Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #496

Episode Date: June 23, 2020

In this week's PKA, Mark from Seaosn 5 of our favorite show, 60 Days In, graces us for nearly 2 hours. He shares stories behind A&E's editing decisions to make him look like a goober working his way to be podboss, when in reality he was tight with folks out the gate. You're not gonna want to miss Mark's stories about his time in prison! Also we get into some hockey hazing stories and Taylor shares some tales from his grandfather... so you know that's going to be a good ride. Tune into this killer episode of PKA right now!

PKA episode 496. New guest, Mark from 60 Days In. Kyle? Couple of sponsors tonight. GOAT, Netgear, and AmeriCorps. PKA is proudly brought to you by AmeriCorps. AmeriCorps needs your help now more than ever. What is AmeriCorps? It is your opportunity to help your neighbor and your nation through these difficult times. AmeriCorps members serve their communities by fighting hunger, teaching, tutoring, and mentoring students, as well as responding to natural disasters. AmeriCorps is your chance to get involved and be the greater good. Search the hundreds of opportunities and apply at joinamericorps.gov. That's joinamericorps.gov.

Yeah, link down below. Dot gov. We've really made it. So, Mark, thank you so much for coming on man I was My pleasure y'all Yeah I was saying before the show The kind of beginning of this I started streaming it on Twitch

And everybody wanted to get someone from the show And we were on season 5 I jumped in at season 5 for some random ass reason And they wanted Mark And so Chiz by god God, he got Mark. So thanks again for coming on, man. Hey,

fist bump guys. Hell yeah. There we go. I like a little engagement. That's nice. So it makes you feel good. So, you know,

I like one of the most obvious questions on there, I guess, uh, for people who don't know 60 days in, it's a program where you spend 60 days in a, in a prison or a jail. And you have to try and solve a mission where you need to figure out some information on behalf of the prison guards and everything. But one of the things, the first thing I thought of when I wanted to ask you was,

was there anything so scary, so outrageous that they couldn't even put it on the show that happened to you? Where someone got stabbed or there was blood? Because I imagine there's a line A&E goes with like oh shit that's a little too brutal we can't show up what it's what's about to become a rape you know i can only speak of uh of my pod but no we never had anything like that happen um i think the a and e was pretty true to what they showed minus the editing but we can get into that here as the interview progresses. But as far as anything too graphic, too nasty, nah. Nah, there was nothing that bad.

That's good to hear. I went into every episode or the very beginning of every season kind of making my own internal power rankings where I'm like this motherfucker's gonna kill it or like, oh no, this chick is fucked. Oh no, she's not gonna do well. Or like, oh no, this chick is fucked. Oh no.

Like she's not going to do well. I think that was the season where that was that blonde woman and her only Chiron was right wing conservative. Yeah. Apparently that was, that's all she's ever been about. And like the intro for those people is hilarious. Cause like you'll come from someone, you know, like, like yours where it's like, I just kind of, you know, want to learn how this goes.

I want to try and, you know, you're, you're Christian like, I just kind of, you know, want to learn how this goes. I want to try and, you know, you're Christian, you want to reach them with a positive message. And she's like packing in her nice hair ties and everything, being like only bad people go to prison and I'm a good person. And so I'll be fine in there. And it's not, you know, I think we give it, they have it too easy

in there. And it's like, oh no, this bitch is in for a rude awakening. The people who think that prisoners have it too easy, you know, they never do so well. Strange enough. You know, it turns out it's like, oh no, this bitch is in for a rude awakening. The people who think that prisoners have it too easy, they never do so well. Strange enough. It turns out it's not that easy. Well, I was stuck though with that nomenclature super fan, which I didn't like. That was an A&E production decision. So I think I would have rather been, I don't know who got worse. Worse criticism was either me or the right-wing conservative. So I think if I hadn't finished it as strong as I did, I might have gotten it. I don't know.

I don't know which nomenclature is worse. I didn't think you were going to make it. I didn't think you were going to make it. I didn't think. No, it looked – you really proved everybody wrong. I'm sure you take pride in that. And that was probably – I want to say, in the first episode of every season

there's sort of this moment where you're hanging out with some of the people who run the jail and I want to say one of them was even kind of rude to you, right? Yeah, so Sheriff Lamb, he came up to me and said, man, would you steal pencils?

Come on, dog. I was stuck as the pencil. And then if you guys remember the first day I walked in the pod, Rocker came up and accused me of stealing a pig and a bicycle. So unfortunately, in the very beginning, I was kind of labeled as the weak person. You know, it is what it is. You know, I know I wear the glasses. I'm kind of the big, fat, jovial, nerdy dude. But, you know, what a lot of people don't know about me is, you know, I served 13 years in the Army first.

And then I actually became a corrections officer for a spell here in Georgia. And so I won't say that that prepared me, but i've learned how to put up with a lot of crap and just deal with so i would say i was vastly underestimated yeah yeah for sure you definitely found like a niche within the uh within the pod i guess and it seemed like before long you were kind of like the number two guy among the whites what because like like our audience knows like it's it's very divided racially in the uh in the pods and jails and especially in prisons but it seemed like you were kind of like second in command of the whites at some point you were the guy who's like all right guys white meeting let's go and so yeah but like

there were these awkward moments where the guy who was in charge, I can't recall his name, but the guy who – Yeah, the leader of the whites. Yeah, Lord Farquad. Yeah, Lord Farquad, who's like a legit white. And, of course, super racist guy. But he would say some awful things to you. He'd be like, you know, this race or that race, you know how

they are. Just rat people, really. And you're just like, yeah! And if you guys saw the pre-edited stuff, it was even worse. He was talking all this Aryan-German

Nazi language lingo to me. And I'm like, what was the most absurd thing you had to agree with with him? Everything he says, you just have to be a sounding board, right? You can't go. Actually, I'm not 100 percent sure about that assertion. You have to go. Hell, yeah, obviously. Yeah. I mean, geez. So, yeah, I would say that, you know, he was very he was very much, you know, his views, I mean, duh, geez. So, yeah, I would say that he was very much, his views fell in line kind of with the Nazi party, if you will,

if you can imagine what Hitler would say. And I was like, oh boy, this is going to be awesome. But, you know, I got, especially if you watch Twitter traffic during the show, I got a lot of crap for White TV Day. Oh my God, White TV Day was so funny. But you got to understand, there, it's about surviving. And I'm sure maybe this will lead up to Dylan, the kid that got jumped for wanting to hang with the black guys.

Before we jump to that, can you break down the White TV Day thing for people who don't know what happened there? Okay, so once again, a lot of it was edited and I own it. I will completely own that awkward moment. But, um, so, so, you know, uh, everyone had a TV day, we had a schedule and, and, and in jail, of course, uh, you know, I didn't care what was on TV that day, but doggone it, it's the white guy's day to watch TV, and there's no way you're going to be able to let any other race. And that was another thing that they mentioned it, but the general public didn't take it too well, is it really was a racially divided gel. It was in Arizona. And I actually heard one of your previous podcasts where you talked, and I felt some redemption by listening to the podcast, where you had the gentleman on that had done the British guy, and I don't remember his name. I'm sorry. Yeah, yeah. And

he talked about being in Arizona and how racially divided it was. So it was racially divided. I'm going to tell you, March Madness was on, and I wanted to watch some doggone basketball. But it was more the only reason why I really made a big deal about it was because it was more of, you know, what this white TV day you had to fit in. You know, I didn't like any of the crap that Josh talked about. Once again, I, you know, I did time in the army. talked about. Once again, I did time in the Army. I'm a law enforcement officer now. And at the end of the day, it doesn't matter what color you are. You got to have my back. You got my back. I got your back. So that was kind of the background that I came from. And even though growing up in the deep South, we still have people here that aren't racist.

But it was just one of those things that I had to prove a point. I had to get in, if you will, with Josh, it didn't matter who, uh, any of the other guys because it was the white guys that had my back and I had to, I had to get in so I can find information. So I think they were watching my pod was weird, you know, working at the prison and, uh worked before you know in a jail um you know most guys have that machoism that they all want to watch sports all the time but i was stuck in a pod that wanted to watch cartoons and i was kind of sick of cartoons

i really wanted to watch doggone basketball so in my head it was just a great idea hey let's let's prove myself to uh to josh and um i had no intention of ever being elevated to second in charge that one kind of kind of broadsided me um but but uh the number two nazi if you ever do 60 days in again that could be your chiron number two i put it on my resume. And so I've got that out now. We'll see. We'll see if anything happens as a result of that. But yeah, you know, it was just one of those things that it had.

I could care less what was on TV. It was more about acceptance. And unfortunately there, even though on the outside, I despise, you know, racism on the inside. I had to give a crap about it because, you know, there you don't you don't run with the whites. You get jumped by in the hand. You're dealt. You're in prison. You have to be racist. Like, that's the rule. Yeah. And they will tell you in there in Pinal County, one of the biggest topics of discussion was everything you do here follows you in the Department of Corrections. So one thing you guys didn't really see that was edited out is Josh got all his directions.

He'd make a phone call up to whoever it was up at DOC that was in charge of the white guys. And every decision you make follows you because they communicate with the Department of Correction, the guys in prison up there. Oh, wow. So what was, when you chose March Madness for White TV Day and then immediately it seemed like Rocker, who was like the black main enforcer on the block, immediately it seems like he's like,

you're turning it to March Madness and you're not even going to watch? This motherfucker's not even watching the March Madness and like he immediately starts calling you out where you just I would have been scared right away like oh no I thought I did something that everybody would like and now I'm getting roasted

so I wasn't really scared of Rocker Rocker you saw him fight that one kid Brandon and he you know don't get me wrong I had no issues with Rocker on a personal level but he didn't scare me once again probably being in the military I don't get me wrong. I had no issues with Rocker on a personal level, but he didn't scare me. Once again, probably being in the military, I don't get scared of a lot of things except my wife. She scares me. But that being said, I don't get scared of a lot of things.

But, you know, at that point, a lot of editing took place there. So I watched TV for probably an hour and then and then I I walked away and was, I don't remember what I was doing. And then, then of course, uh, rock made that comment. So, you know, it was more to prove a point. And then the one thing you really kind of saw a little bit of, but you didn't see the whole story is we kind of took everything to Josh to see how he'd react since he was the pod boss, uh, for the whites, for the woods. Remember it's woods, whites only one day soon.

And just to kind of see how he reacted. And at the end he relented and said, Hey, y'all put it on whatever you want to. And it's like, dude, dude, why are you, why are you talking all this talk? And then you back down whenever anything happens. Yeah. He sold you down the river on that. We didn't see that part. Absolutely. I still hate that guy for that son of a gun the number one thing was the tv thing few rungs down was the nazi thing you know mainly the the throwing me under the bus yeah i did another part i liked was once you started to get your yourjo, your groove going, you were like, I'm going to, I'm a Christian man. I'm going to get a Bible study rocking and rolling in here.

And you just start yelling in the pod, Bible study, Bible study. And I could tell the body language because you did the shoulder pop, moving around, the Bible study, imitating the prison, the head bobbing kind of thing. And I was like, as I'm watching, I'm like, please, someone go to his Bible study. Just one guy go to his Bible study. And no one wanted to learn about the Bible. That shocked me because I was like,

I thought that was a safe bet in prison. There's so many people there who were born again or whatever. And there were no takers, no Christians. So can I unveil the curtain of TV magic? Hold the curtain back. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Awesome. So what they did was they took pretty much every time I yelled Bible study, let me explain that story. Let me explain that story just a little more. So I had a lot of people that would actually come to my Bible study. Everyone I had, I had anywhere from seven to about 15 guys that would come.

Wow. And a couple of them, it gets so loud in the pod, just everybody chit-chatting and talking and watching TV and whatnot, that they would want me to yell Bible study. So they knew, oh, okay, cool, I'm going to go to Bible study. And what they did was they took multiple moments that I called it throughout the entire 60 days in and they edited it into one clip. And, and trust me, when we saw that,

I was just like, Oh my God, I'm serious right now. Yeah. Cause it ends with you sitting there to buy my private, a private Bible study. You're like, all right.

And Bible study has begun. Yeah. And it's just me yeah that is that is speaking of which you know how trump yells fake news all the time yeah yeah that was that was fake news this is truly fake news yeah oh that was awesome oh thank you i'll bust that out a little more i thought it was trump for a minute um But no. So I've never had no one come to my Bible study. That was just more, you know, we're going to edit it to make them look corny. In fact, to be to be to tell you a little bit more of some funny stuff that came out when they came out, when I came out of jail,

I made good friends with with some of the production people. And one of them actually came up to me and said, you're going to hate the first five episodes. But after that, you're going to love it. I'm like, huh? Her? So once again, the one thing about 60 Days In that you guys don't see is there's a lot of editing to it. And I understand it because if you saw that 99% of the time we watch TV,

you probably wouldn't tune in so it's 99 of boredom followed by one percent of sheer terror i would be livid if i saw that episode with the bible study and like you're watching you're like yeah that was like week three oh and that call that was like week seven that was yeah and then all edited together those bastards they they really fucked you on that segment. See, now go back and watch and you'll see some interviews. At one point in the interview, I'm clean shaven.

And then the next point, I have a beard. And you'll see. No, I'm not saying that it's all bad. It's not. But it is an extremely edited show. And you'd be surprised. Being stuck as the Bible study guy is, you know, I'm a Christian anyway.

I'm a man of faith. So it's not exactly a terrible mantra to be stuck with. In fact, on my Instagram account, there's one guy all the time. Like, I mean, this show has been off now for over a year. Every time I post something, he's got to put Bible study, but he's got to put study Jesus, dude. I'm like, it's been a year.

Oh, you shouldn't have said that. I'm sure no one else will do that. It'll just be him. Oh, yeah. It's kind of like a large podcast, so never mind. I just set myself up for failure. Yes. Oh, well, hey, it gets the engagement up.

That's what you want on Instagram, right? Yes. So, my goodness. So what was the – or Kyle, you can probably relate this better. The whole – or both of you. The whole money situation. When you went in there initially, did they kind of prime you and say like, hey, don't go to commissary and drop big money.

Go there and spend like $6 on ramen or something. Yeah. So just to let you know, production actually puts money on your books. But they tell you in the beginning, they don't put a lot of money, like maybe $30 or $40 a week. And when you buy phone time and all that, it doesn't work out to where you have a lot. But yes, to answer your question on that, they would tell you don't make yourself a target. Because the moment you go and you buy a whole store, and I've watched some of these other seasons, especially season six here recently,

seasons especially season six here recently where uh one guy i think it was tony got like freaking 500 ramen noodle packets and stuff like that now tony could back it up okay tony looks like he could whoop some butt and take some names but uh but that was a big thing that a and e said uh production people said do not make yourself a tarp yeah there was one guy in season three or maybe season four that as soon as he stepped foot in he treated it like it was supermarket sweep and he was like i need i need all of that all of he's had a giant satchel and immediately this one like jacked black dude like his interview happens and he's not someone who's in on the show he's like i'm gonna push up on everybody i'm pushing up on everybody in this and immediately he like goes to that guy and he's like, I'm going to push up on everybody. I'm pushing up on everybody in this. And immediately he goes to that guy and is like, give me your chips.

Oh, no, give me your magazines. The guy had a stack of magazines, and he just, here you go. Here's all my magazines I just spent money on. And that's the thing. Yeah. You don't give your stuff up. Even as a participant, man, the moment you give your stuff up, you make yourself a target um because uh they'll

they'll see you as a weak-minded and uh so you didn't really see a lot but i would i would trade commissary even even uh in my season and but i would make sure if i gave you a pack of ramen i got two in return so you never at any point do you yeah so seeing some of that but it is what it is but once as so when the editing is also so some sometimes so substantial that it's like okay what do i believe and what do i don't believe yeah but was there uh there was one season i was watching that when they have that little round table at the end, one of the women did drugs, like smoked pot or did some weird drug mixture paste. And everybody's like, that's bullshit. And she was like, no, everybody liked me after that.

Nobody thought I was in the program after that. Were you ever offered drugs or were tempted? You don't seem like a drug user normally, but were you ever tempted like, man, if I do this, I'll be really in. They'll know that I'm not on this program. Okay, so no, I was never offered drugs, strangely enough. I guess I was Bible study guy. But towards the end, and there's some things that as far as intel that I gave the sheriff,

it didn't make the final cut. But in fact, the guy Rocker, Rocker always talked about how many drugs he could get. And he told me about a possible or a staff member there at pennell county that was uh he was crooked and you could get drugs off of him so i actually tried to make up a cell to where i can get it off the staff member so i could go in and just drop the i don't remember what i was asking for i think i was asking for cocaine and uh yeah because i look like a coke head, right? Yeah. Right. No, it's going to be my first time, you know? Yeah. Yeah.

Maybe weed. Like I got the belly for weed, but maybe not. But anyway, you can pull weed off. Yeah. But some of the things you actually didn't see, there were some things that transpired and everybody in the pod turned on rocker and we were pretty much told if we ever talked to rocker again that uh that we would uh we would be jumped

so the entire pod turned on rocker i wish they had shown that but i was actually trying to set up a cocaine bill and i was in the process of of getting it done and i probably would have had it if if he hadn't of uh he wound up punching out an old an old guy and uh and yeah oh that's content why didn't they show that okay so we had a guy that was crazy he was crazy he was crazy but he was just an old old guy you know you don't mess with the crazy old guys he might be one of the woods or one of I think he was a Paisa. So they did a good job of showing what they call Chicanos, the woods, and the Kinsfolk. But what they didn't show was they didn't show what they call Paisas. So the difference between a Chicano and a Paisa is a Chicano is an American-born person of Mexican heritage, whereas a Paisa is illegal. person of Mexican heritage, whereas at Paisa is illegal.

And so, yeah, so this guy, he was just old and he just was just, he just ticked off a lot of people, but he was an old guy. Well, a rocker went up to him at one point and just knocked the crap out of him. And I was standing there like, should I do something? And yeah, I didn't do anything no should i do something no yeah no yeah so uh he hit this guy and the retaliation with that was uh was basically we're gonna run him out of here he's about to get jumped and uh before all that transpired or anything happened we actually got pulled um so i don't know what happened to rocker as a result of that but i almost had a bag of cocaine damn it that would have been a true victory because so many times

i'll see people talk about the mission and it's like no like you three in particular that maybe it was three women during your season where all they did was just i get the seasons mixed up because i've been watching them in different orders all trained together but i think it was your season where there were three women and almost immediately as soon as they discerned oh you're in the program too it's like that was just the click it was like we're you can't blame them though like like that was just the click. It was like we're hardly going to still get in. You can't blame them, though. That's what I'd do, too. Frankly, if the pay is the same, then fuck their mission, right? I'm not going to be getting in with anybody and be like, hey, I know I'm new here, and my charges are a little bit foggy because of that whole federal hold thing, but I really want a weapon. Could you get me a weapon?

And also drugs of some kind, any kind, really just, I would let, no, I'm not putting my neck out for them unless I'm getting a bonus. Now, if there was,

that's how the show should be. It should be more like, all right, we're going to pay you $10,000 to do this thing. But for every piece of contraband you get for weapons, 5,000 cash. And they should, they should just be laying it on you.

That would get me motivated. Yeah, that would get me motivated. And I bet that would motivate you too, right? Like if they had told you... I'm already gaming the system. They gave me this whip. That's a shoelace. Fuck off, it's a prison whip. So that is your belt.

That is your belt. Yeah, but it's got these studs on the end. I would have had shanks. I would have on the end. I would have had shanks. I would have had samurai swords. I would have had what I could, man. But if they're just sending me in for this flat fee and I meet someone who is not a degenerate piece of shit, me and him are going to be buddies.

We're going to sit over there and talk about not being degenerate pieces of shit and how we actually have families and we know our fathers. That's going to be our topic of conversation and hope that we get to watch some March Madness in between, but I'm not mixing it up. Now I will actually, that's a good point. I will say that one of the things they told us before going in, don't act like something you're not.

You know, I'm obviously don't come across as a tough guy. So if I went in there and started trying to pick a fight i probably would have found it so they said you know don't go in and act act any different than you already are so i just kind of went in and did what i do as an awkward fist bump bible study guy as i am yeah and you and you owned that and people thought you were genuine because of it. And that's why you were endearing to a lot of them because it became evident like you're not trying to put on airs and be a wood gangster.

I think I attracted a lot of people with my gender. It's either they felt really bad for me or there's a lot of awkward people out there. If I was going to do the show, my idea is I'd be like, all right, I'll do it. But when you bring me into the pod, I'm not walking in that line all chained up. You put me on a dolly chained up with a Hannibal Lecter mask. Yeah. So, so many chains that it's disturbed. Like that movie Con Air.

Yes, exactly. Like Steve Buscemi in Con Air. Exactly like Con Air. And they wheel me in, and I'm thrashing around and everything, and suddenly it's like, what's that guy have? And then they say, a lot of AIDS and Epsi. He'll bite you. And then, you know, I probably

I would have got the shit beat out of me for that. No, nobody's going to want you to bleed on them. Nobody's going to want to fuck with that. That's alright, brother. I would have given you Bible study after you got your butt kicked. I would have been happy to go to Bible study after getting my ass kicked. Would have been a nice little thing, you know. So, yeah. Go ahead, Kyle.

I was just going to say, I had never seen the show until a couple of months ago. Last year, I did two months in a federal prison. And while I was in there, I told them, I was like yeah i'm here for 60 days and they kept giving me these weird looks and then somebody was like you know uh they think you're in some part of a tv show called 60 days in because you know you really don't fit in you know and i was just like uh i don't know what that is he's like oh it's where they send in a narc and i'm just like, I don't know what that is. He's like, oh, it's where they send in a narc. And I'm just like, no, no, no. So when I got out, I was like, I got to watch this fucking TV show that they were all talking about. But that's got to be a problem going forward because every season the show gets more popular and more and more inmates are aware of the show.

show gets more popular and more and more inmates are aware of the show so if a fucking production crew shows up to your jail you've got to immediately start wondering you know are they filming 60 days in right now so the company that we actually filmed with isn't a and e it's and for safety reasons i'm not gonna name yeah i not going to name the production company it's lucky a casting that does it but they'll come in and they'll have people sign waivers everyone that's in the pod has to sign a waiver and it says what production company

it was well part of me didn't realize it was the guy Ratchet the guy that jumped Dylan and he called home and had someone do some research. They were like, hey, this production

company works for A&E. I'm sitting there the whole time stressing like, oh goodness gracious. There's only one gel show on A&E. I hope they're not smart enough to put this together. Then I played it off completely. I was like, did you see that one guy the camera guy he had a lockdown raw

key tag you know on his keys and they were like what I was like yeah and so then they started believing it was the show lockdown yeah they took the bait thank goodness yeah they need a good cover story because I can't think of many

things you would want to be known as less than a narc in there you know like like like you you can be gay or you can you can be a race traitor you can but but if you're a narc then that's just going against they're not going to have anything to do with you and they may very well hurt you but the very, they're not going to have anything to do with you, and they may very well hurt you. But at the very least, they're going to try to get you the fuck out of that pod. Oh yeah, they're going to run you out. Absolutely. I would. Absolutely.

So yeah, thank God I know some of the other pods. The pod with Abner and the female pod that I mentioned 60 days ago. Oh, you're talking about the Enforcer? Who? Oh, Vivian? Who was the enforcer my season? Abner.

Constantly. He slapped the shit out of that kid. That was hilarious. Good for him. That was one of his best bits. The public opinion turned on him. At that point, he was the strongest participant our season.

He was the enforcer. Apparently, if y'all didn't know, he was the enforcer of the Chicanos. If you didn't know that, okay. I saw a lot of public opinion, especially Twitter, that turned on him when he did that. I understand it doesn't look good, but

most of us have never lived in that environment. I think he probably saved the kid's life i understood it because not only was like like he was in a position where he really had to slap that kid because the kid was talking shit to him instead of listening and it was like at some point he had to back up all the stuff that he'd been saying and he had lived that life for real in the past so like he had to slap that guy that guy was lucky that all he got was a slap really that was the big eared fuck who was stealing sodas right no no it was the kid that was uh like he wanted to run with all the different races oh yeah we had dylan but then uh an admance Pod, they had that kid. I think he was from Hawaii, or he looked like he was Hawaiian maybe.

Yeah, yeah. So I understood it. I understand the perception that people had from that, and a lot of people turned on him, but he probably straightened that kid out. Yeah, that kid needed a slap. And really, he had to deliver that slap or he was going to start looking very weak in front of everyone.

If he let a newcomer, and not just a newcomer, but that kid was like 19, maybe 20, something like that. If he lets that guy talk shit to him and sort of... He kind of had to do that to maintain his cover,

but it didn't look good. I remember they were talking to him and they called him if i remember right he told him to shut up and there are some things and you know there are some things you don't do in jail and if you don't respond like if you're called a bitch or stuff like that you've got to respond yeah that won't work yeah yeah yeah it just doesn't look like much fun at all. Something I do get a kick out of on that show is there has never been a convincing backstory.

Like the, the cover stories, they make those so intentionally convoluted and difficult. I watched, I watched a guy who clearly they took one guy whose charge was growing a bunch of pot a huge grow up and they put him in the room with a guy who's in there for a grow up. And even in all his interviews he's just like, I just hope he doesn't ask me anything about weed.

I don't know. So where do you get your seeds from? What wattage are you running down there? How do you handle the power? I'd rather not talk about it. Why? Why not? Well, it's just natural that a lot of these people have never been undercover. Now, in the military, I work as what's called a human intelligence collector.

So what we do is we did some undercover work. So what we do is we did some undercover work. And so I had, you know, I had the experience, you know, not a massive amount of experience, but I'd been I'd been undercover before in a military setting. And I think people, you know, they don't know how to sell their story. And if anyone questions them, like that deer in the headlight type look. I never had any problems in my story. My story was possession of stolen checkbooks. So I took a little bit of truth and I grained it with a lot of lies because I was a real estate, I'm a real estate agent here in Georgia. Well, I don't do it now.

I'm actually back in law enforcement. But I just said, hey, you know, I fell on hard times. We would go we would go to people's houses. You know, I'm showing them the house and there'd be a stolen checkbook out there. And I'm sorry, a checkbook out there. And then I would just steal it. And so I took a little bit of truth, ingrained it with a whole lot of lies. And I think people just don't know how to sell that story and i've never had any issues except uh pigs and stolen bikes in the beginning but we overcame that one yeah there was there was one woman who she was talking to someone else and the other lady was like and what's your name and she had to like kimberly bracelet she looked at her bracelet and then there was another guy who his cover story was that he embezzled money and it is very clear that even in the jail he

does not know what embezzlement means he doesn't because he's in the he's in the cell it's like a white guy black guy they're in the cell the white guy's the one undercover and the black guy asks like what are you what are you in for white guy's like embezzlement he just goes embezzlement what that is and then you hear the white guy give not that correct an explanation of what he did to constitute embezzlement i think it was something like yeah i worked for a charity and then uh they accused us of taking the money. And it was like, I guess strictly that's right, but that's not very compelling. But his celly bought it, if I recall.

And there are other times where someone will go in thinking they're so confident. I think Calvin was one of those characters. Calvin was a black guy who had very nice hair, and immediately they picked up on that. He was the AT&T Cribs guy. Yeah. He was the one that came in and he said

let me show you my crib yeah that went over well wait what did they pick up on with his hair i didn't follow so he basically he gets in his cell and he clearly has like a fresh new do he's clean cut like does not look like a guy that belongs in prison and he leaves to do an interview i suppose or you know as as mark has been saying, it is heavily edited. And as he's saying, you know, obviously this is edited, he's saying, you know, I really think they trust me. I got in there.

They really seem to like me. And then it shows his celly standing on the desk, shouting through the air vent, being like, yeah, his hair way too nice. He's, yeah, he's on 60 days in. This motherfucker's on 60 days in. And then it goes back to Calvin being like, I think I've earned their trust.

It's like, no, you're fucked. Yeah, that was so good. He'd been there like an hour. He just had gotten there. He's like, I get this locked down. And then they just, the editing is so good. You never know with the editing because it's a reality show,

but editing straight, that guy would be'll be like yeah 60 days in i'm just like i'm all good oh yeah and like the one of the best characters i say characters but one of the participants is nate from season three and four and i think you even said in one of your you know interviews you're like i want to be one of the good ones i want want to be like Nate. I want to like conquer this. Nate is the one, if you don't know, he did 60 days so well in season three that they ask him, you want to do 60 more? And he's like, sure, let's do it. And like anything bad happens to Nate during it, like a black guy fucks with his iPad that you can rent.

And immediately everybody in the cell not just the white guys other black guys these friends with they're like we got your back we're gonna go fuck him up for breaking your ipad and he has to like be like you know guys i don't think we should uh we shouldn't fuck him up too bad no no we're gonna hold him down you stomp his eye yeah maybe nothing with the eyes oh you gotta get the eyes to all the 60 days in fans love nate i'm gonna break your heart for a minute you know they actually flew him out there and he was part of our prepping crew like you had us you know all sitting in the hotel conference room and they're telling us you know the when the sheriff and all them introduce themselves he actually came out there and did a whole lot of about an hour of talking to us and

getting us ready and they completely cut it and so he had the opportunity to be at least on the first episode of season five and for whatever reason the the tv gods decided no how did your plan going in for getting along with everyone like go off course or did your plans come and work out like you must have had some sort of strategy for social stuff yes uh my strategy going in for social stuff was to not do anything and sit back and chill about eight days in they called me out for an interview and they they were like, you can't do that. You've got to get involved. And I was like, but I guess it wasn't good TV. So, you know, as I said, being a man of faith, you know, that was kind of my end. There was a couple of things I did. One thing also that got left on the editing room floor, if you will, was I've got a bachelor's degree and all that stuff. So I'd like to think I'm semi-educated.

But, you know, I helped write resumes for a lot of the guys. That could get hilarious real quick oh it was awesome what experience do you have yeah crackhead you know you know um but i helped write resumes for a lot of the guys because you know a lot of them were they were good people i mean they screwed up they had addiction issues whatever the case may be but i didn't want to see him come back so i would write uh i would write resumes i probably wrote 30 resumes in there uh for the guys and then the bible study thing and you ever had to stretch a resume like where's someone like you're like i'm gonna help you out john what work experience

like was there one where you're just filling in words? Any really funny ones? So there was this one guy. He was, I don't know, maybe 25. He was a young kid, I mean, relatively speaking. And every time he'd smile, he had like one tooth. And he had no life experience, like crystal meth. And he did a lot of meth. And he was still a good kid, but I believe we put that he had a lot of management experience

where he was actually a drug dealer. I mean, it is what it is. Did he have anyone underneath him? Pharmaceutical sales experience in the pharmaceutical industry. I like that. One track mind. Doesn't play with deodorant. High energy!

I liked it, yeah. He was the unlicensed neighborhood pharmaceutical or pharmacist. There we go, Jesus Christ. I think he got a job as an ER physician after that. I mean, I hope they don't find out his real past. You can pop that on here.

I can't see him walking in there like, I don't know what you got, but I know what I need. You know what I'm saying? What was... You always imagine the biggest drugs in there are going to be heroin flying around willy-nilly. Is that true, or is it just a menagerie of everything? You know, unlike the other facilities, our facility wasn't that broken.

I will be honest with you. It wasn't that broken. I would say the biggest drugs that came in and out of our facility, yeah, there were some. People suitcased it, and by suitcasing it, what I mean is they shove it up their butt. Yes, yes. But the biggest smuggle out there is the pharmaceutical drugs. So, you know, a pill call would come, they'd cheek it, and they wouldn't swallow it, and then they'd sell it. So that was probably the biggest

drug in there is just prescription drugs that makes sense easier to get on the outside or actually no not at all I don't know anything about heroin that being said I don't know a lot

sure you do don't short yourself you told me all about your heroin days shhh don't look at the crux of my elbow. I'm just going to see it. I thought you breathed in heroin this whole time. What's the one with the spoon? What's the spoon one?

That's heroin. You draw it out and then you inject it. You can also smoke opium. I doubt a lot of opium is being smoked in these prisons. I don't recall seeing any. Nobody's smoking opium outside of 18th century fucking San Francisco.

I was going to say China maybe. Yeah, nobody's smoking opium anymore. Get with it, Taylor. Sherlock Holmes did. Jeez, Taylor. Exactly. Thank you. Sherlock Holmes did Exactly Thank you Sherlock Holmes did it in China That was in the UK

How many episodes in a row are you going to come off like a square Huh Taylor I'm just a bitch Just a drug bitch Hard drug bitch So I like the episode when the guys were making hooch in their cell

and trying to hide it. It wasn't like they were making a bottle of alcohol. Hooch is contraband alcohol. They're making using fruit pulp that they get from either commissary or from their lunch trays. They weren't making a bottle of it.

They had three gallons of it. They were cooking up in like a tote. How do you even hide that? It's it, it smells so strongly. If you've never smelled it, like it's potent sort of sweet, rotten sort of smell.

If you get anywhere near it, you smell it. It was outrageous that they thought they could hide that. So the police just didn't care. Theal officers no they caught they walked in the cell was like i smell hooch and they like drag out a tote full of alcohol and it's like a gigantic trash bag full of this stuff and they're like all right whose is it and the one guy's like it's mine all right come on you're going to the hole and they drag him out of there he was done strong as hooch is that like a vodka level thing?

You always hear the phrase toilet wine. Yeah, I think it's more like wine. I think you're looking at like 10 or 12% alcohol. And it's made, you know, I wouldn't care for that. But if it's all you've got, you know, it'd probably pass the time. Or another thing is orange pills. Did you ever see orange pills? No, no.

They'll dry them out and smoke them. In the prison I was in, they just had real alcohol. They would have somebody go and throw alcohol over the fences or fly it in with drones. When we'd go out for rec time, they would just go out there and they would pick up a bottle

of alcohol, stuff it down their pants, and they'd be back in the dorms that night. Great idea, drones. stuff it down their pants and they'd be back in the dorms that night. Drones have become more and more now. That's been the preferred method because there's a sense of risk. What a lot of people will do is they'll fill it in the past because they would fill the drones, cell phones, whatever, in a football or a soccer ball and then they

throw it over um i don't know why i had to demonstrate throw it over there you go throwing whatever but uh now now there's always a risk an inherent risk with that and uh now it's become a lot easier just fly it in out and you don't have a chance of getting caught yeah yeah um but there was every drug uh where i was like like every conceivable drug um you would smell the marijuana and uh what do they what do they call that fucking synthetic marijuana that that's always messing people up spice yeah there would there would be a lot of people with spice and uh but cigarettes was the main contraband item. The guards didn't give a damn about cigarettes or tobacco in general,

as long as you didn't do it right under their noses. But as soon as the guards walked in to do a head count, everybody that smoked went to the bathroom to light up a cigarette. Actually, that's a good point, because anything that we planned in our pod was based on the guard's schedule, because walk through and you knew as soon as they walked out the door, they wouldn't be back for 30, 45 minutes. So everything from whether it be drugs or fights or whatever was planned around when they left. Absolutely. Yeah. I don't remember the exact schedule, but I think they'd come through around 9pm or 9.30pm and then it would be another three hours before they came back through. We would have two and a half, three hours at a time

of no guards whatsoever at night time. That's when everybody would smoke or get up to whatever else they wanted to get up to. Were there any fights in your prison, Kyle? Not while I was there, I don't think. Not in front of me, for sure. That's because they didn't want to mess with Kyle. They knew Kyle was a whoop there. That makes sense. Yeah, that was it.

That was Kyle. When I first heard about you, I heard that you were a ninja by training. I do have some ninja training. Dabbled. I've dabbled in the ninja arts. I watched every season of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as a child. I had the van that shot the pizzas. So that was...

I like your ass because I watched every season of Street Sharks. I love Street Sharks. I know the theme song of Street Sharks. Get out of here. All right. Well, then we're equally matched very well okay i'll i'll take that yeah no i don't think i ever saw any fights i know i didn't see any i definitely saw people uh get a little rowdy and like threaten each other and i was told of some

fights that had happened before i had gotten there like in my cell somebody had gotten the shit beaten out of them and i don't remember what for what's this in the context because I picture like a a really big room with no yeah our cells were were weird um it's it was a gigantic dorm room with um these concrete dividers that on me they would come up to right about here so like these concrete dividers that on me, they would come up to right about here. So like five and a half feet or something like that. And, but there's no door,

you know, there's just concrete dividers splitting rooms alongside the wall. So, so one of your walls is the wall of the dorm with a little bullshit window in it. And then to your left is a five and a half foot tall cinder block wall until your right is as well then there's just an open space to walk into a hallway and you know easiest to solve maze just yes yeah there's no maze to it at all really and you know there's along each side

of the wall there was a row of these cells if you will and then down the center there was two rows of them as well um so yeah we were just locked in a big, big dorm with 125, 150 guys. You said you were in a cell. Is that what you refer to as you and the guy, the bunk? Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. That's what we called those rooms. We call them cells or cubes. Okay. It was one or the other, you know, you called your buddy,

your celly. So, which, which I never cared for. You're silly that talk too much. It is my favorite story of the whole time. Oh, God. Greg was the worst. Greg, I had a cellmate.

He was about a 60, 65-year-old black man. And he'd been in for maybe eight. And he had about four or five more to go. And he was very focused on getting out, getting his life back together. He'd see his family every Saturday. He would talk to himself continuously all the fucking time. All the time he would talk to himself. Not about anything really poignant.

Really just about what he was doing right now. He's like, all right. About to get ourselves fresh and clean. As he put his hair treatment in and combed his hair. But getting fresh and clean, getting the day started right. Yes, sir. Oh, Greg, getting the day started right. About to get that mouthwash.

Yep, getting fresh and clean. Fresh and clean. I'm like, is he reusing mouthwash? Fresh and clean. Fresh and clean. He spit the mouthwash back into the bottle. He spit it back into the bottle. Kind of clean.

That defeats the whole point. But it was like, yeah, look at Greg making the bed. Greg, I'm making the bed. He was making his bed. Making the bed. Making it up right and tight. Right and tight. Yes, sir.

Making the bed. Starting the day right. Yes, sir. And I'm just up there on the top bunk just like like staring at the ceiling like 23 more days. 23 more days. Most people's favorite character in the Kyle story is Snow, but I'm on team Greg. Greg was the worst. Greg was so annoying. Greg was more annoying than the guy that wanted to rape me. Greg was so, at least I knew where

the guy that wanted to rape me was at all time because i kept my eyes on his area of the but but but greg i'd be asleep and i'm like all right good greg's visiting his family i'd hear good day with the family yes sir yes sir good day with the family and i'm like oh he's back he's fucking back he'd have bo all the time people talk to you about greg i mean other people must have shared this. Yes Frustration. Yeah. Yeah me and snow would talk about Greg all the time We'd be out like during rec time like like doing our laps and I'd be like this motherfucker Smells so bad and he talks non-stop

What's he talking about? He talking shit. I'm just like no no, he's not talking shit. No, he's just talking to himself He talking shit and i'm just like no no he's not talking shit no he's just talking to himself he's talking shit to himself what if he is we're gonna get him for that great you gotta smell i can't remember what uh what snow would call him um but he smelled like from out oh formaldehyde or something like that he had that that hair stuff. Black people have a different kind of hair treatment than we do, and I'm not very accustomed to the smell. No, it wasn't even black.

No, Greg was black. Oh, Greg was black. I thought you said Snow for a second. No, Snow was Mexican, Texan, something or another, but Greg had that stuff he put in his hair, and he was the only black person who used that particular brand. It was like old black man hair treatment that smelled so much fouler than anything else anyone else used. The stuff that the young black guys used,

I'd be like, I'd smell it, and be like, hmm, kind of got like a Axe body spray, kind of a nice smell to it. All right. I could get down with something like that. That smells good because my hair stuff was literally like a bottle of green aloe vera hair gel. It wasn't. And you had to put so much in your hair to make your hair do anything like what mine does now. It didn't work.

Greg always smelled like chemicals all the time and i would just have my blanket pulled over my greg was the worst he was a nice guy i guess speaking of really terrible annoying awful people i just looked back up to confirm make sure and that guy steve on your season season five he is the dickhead that we talked about i think on pkn where he was in there for maybe three hours and then a couple of inmates he's he first of all he's covered up like a bitch just saying and his cover story is that he's listening for for contraband info and then a couple of inmates in there start fucking with him and saying like yeah we're bringing acid into the into the prison and because they know and he thought it was like the biggest find in the history of

prison violence. And we know how big of a problem LSD is in our prison system. You hear about it non-stop and he thought that they were being real when it's like you dip a birthday card in LSD and then you spray a little bit of Dolce & Gabbana on there

and then ship it in there and then I guess everybody's tripping. And then he immediately does the, ah, my neck, my fucking neck or my shoulder. Oh, shit, my shoulder. What was the – when you finally saw him, I guess, on the footage or in that little round table, what was your kind of perspective on it? Was it just, this guy's a bitch? Okay, this guy – okay, just to let you know that uh when you guys watch the reunion or the round table as you called it uh we didn't know about him until uh the

reunion and um man the guy actually had a as crazy as it sounds he had a good edit um really he looks terrible he was he was even a bigger a bigger d-bag man um and uh in fact i'll actually share share some other stuff with you guys before we get done with this conversation about him just to show you how big of a d-bag he is but um he just came in blaming everybody but himself blaming production uh talking about how when they pulled him out he jumped the producer and I'm like no you didn't dude because you would have really like been in Pinal County

for real that would be kind of cool though he'd be the first series history first guy to go to prison but yeah man he was just he came in he was arrogant and he was even worse than as I said a series history. First guy to go to prison. But yeah, man, he came in, he was arrogant, and he was even worse than, as I said,

the reunion portrayed, because I think they were... Because he started naming names of production people, and so they took all that out. In fact, when he left, because he only came in for a segment, we filmed for about 12 hours in New York, the reunion episode, and he was came in for a segment. We filmed for about 12 hours in New York and the, the reunion episode.

And he was there for an hour and, uh, uh, they actually pulled him out and chauffeured him out before they'd even let us get a break. But the guys just, you know, I try to,

I'm, I'm, I'm the king of second chances. And I guess it's, it's because of my faith or whatnot, but I try to give everyone a second chance that he recently faked his own death no one noticed no one noticed he got distraught when he realized there wasn't a funeral they had a barbecue

i mean he we had a going away party on the day after he died. No, but yeah, so he just, I woke up and a fan sent me this obituary. And, you know, I was like, man, it sucks, dude. You know, I don't wish any ill will, no matter how much I don't like or wish ill will on somebody. And that's exactly what happened here is I woke up to an obituary and I freaked out. So I started trying to call him and all this, he wouldn't answer. He turned his Facebook page into a, what do you call it? Remembering me? Oh my God. So I actually, uh, you know, I was, I was freaked out, man. And, and, and so I posted on his Facebook page and,

and some of his friends, man, hit me up on Messenger. That's how big of a D-bag he is. And I'm like, oh, my gosh, I've known him for, like, freaking 20, 30, 40 years, man. And so I had this girl, and she just, like, wigged out on me. And I'm like, I'm sorry. I'm like, you know, I just posted it because a fan told me that he, you know, showed me his obituary. And she's like, oh, my God, I'm going to go to his house. I'm going to go check it out and all this stuff and uh i go to work and i come out of work and uh i have a message about how big of an a-hole i was and this that and the other because

i freaked her out because he wasn't really dead did you figure out why he did it no he's still supposedly dead so he's still supposedly dead. He's still playing dead, so we can't get a word out of him. Sticking with a failed fake death? Pretty ballsy. He's playing it out to the extreme. I even called, and a girl picked up his phone, and she's like,

yeah, I'll have him call you back, and he's never called me back, so I guess he's still dead. Of course not, he's dead. So, it is what it is you know it he's he's even a bigger a bigger jerk in real life is he the one that was the private eye taylor yeah he was the one really going in just saying he was hard as shit and that he had been... I've been attacked while tailing people. And my first thought was, then you're a bad PI because you shouldn't be tailing them

to the point that they get so upset they not only lose you, they get out, confront you, and beat you up. You're a bad private investigator. That guy snuck. He was my least favorite. Lowest in the power rankings by far. Well, if we're going on the whole show...

No, you go by season. Otherwise, it's just convoluted. Because remember, there was that one guy who didn't even make it into the pod. He cracked in the holding cell. No, he cracked in a Marriott. He didn't even get in.

Oh, I wasn't even going to make fun of that poor little man. Yeah, he didn't even make it in. He was at the hotel. That little man did not need to be in there. And I've called him little man three times in a row now for a very good reason. He is the most tiny human being I've ever seen who didn't. Did you see that guy with your own eyes? How tiny is he? I've ever seen who didn't... How small... Did you see that guy with your own eyes?

How tiny is he? I don't know if he was on the same season. Oh, yeah, I didn't think he was. But he knew his name, so that led me astray. When he was given his excuse, he said, I'm 5'3 and little. I will give... We're losing you a bit, Mark.

We lost you on that one. He knew his limitations. Oh, are you? Hello? Hello? Yeah, I think you're okay. Yeah, you were saying he knew his limitations. Well, he didn't before he signed up.

He learned his limitations. He learned as he was watching free porn at that Marriott that night. Did he do that? I don't know if he did that, but he failed at the Marriott. He didn't even get pretend arrested yet. He said, I don't really want to do it, and I just want to go back to my job making candy at the Wonka factory. This is a bad idea. We can hear you now. You're good now. to my job making candy at the Wonka factory. I don't like it here.

This is a bad idea. We can hear you now. You're good now. Okay, sorry about that. I'm going to give the guy credit where credit's due, though. He knew his limitations. Let's be honest. If he had gone into Fulton County,

and I'm from the Atlanta, Georgia area, so I know Fulton County, dude, I wouldn't have called. In fact, just to give you kind of a heads up, when you go through the whole interview process, the only reason why I agreed to go to Pinal County is I did some research. If they told me, like, Fulton County or doggone Rikers Island or L.A. County, I wouldn't have done it.

So I give the guy at least credit to say, hey, I can't do this. That guy's biggest limitation is being able to get on roller coasters. Jesus, Taylor. Why can't I ride the Batman? You're way nicer than me. Fuck that guy. You're not entertaining in any way. You should have left the spot open for someone who would have taken it more

seriously. Cause there was someone who got from that shit who would have actually give a fuck, given a fuck. And that guy, that was disappointing. Are you sure that he wasn't good content in a different way? You know,

like not everyone needs to be a surprise success. That that's, that's just one piece of the puzzle at a good show. I now agree with you. Yeah. But if you, if you look at the Casting of each season We're all pretty much the same people They have to cast the tough guy

They gotta cast the awkward Weird guy For me I can think of past people A lot of people compare me because they say I look like Jeff From season one And Jeff's a great dude Just just the guy that got hit. He was the security guard that wanted to be the corrections officer. But you always have the goofy guy, which was me and I guess Jeff

and Matt's son from season five, you know, the father-son couple. You know, it seems like they have their own stereotypes that they want to put in. But I think it's here that really dictates how well you'll do. Who was the really athletic black guy, Taylor? If you remember, Mark, tell me.

Which season? On Mark's season? My seasons are a little mixed up. I watched him on your stream, though. Then it was either seasons 3 Probably seasons 5 or 3 He might have been a cop David How did he do He was super strong

He was jacked I think I called him a wide receiver on a different episode Like he looked like he could be a pro athlete Very fit I love David i mean honestly a lot of people love to talk smack about david because of how our season ended and woody i don't know if you remember but david was the guy that uh he blew the whole season um he told uh he told the corrections officer who he supposedly who he was and then

he told one of the inmates who he was who in turn went over back to Abner's pod because him and Abner had beef in the beginning and then started getting everybody telling everybody that there was more to Abner than met the eye and almost got him jumped so Abner actually

had to tap out and talk that's my source of pride I'm the big goofy guy but I'm the last male to get pulled from my season. Nice little badge you got. It's true. A lot of people talk smack about him. I don't know what happened. He denies a lot of it.

And to be honest, with so much editing on the show, some of us don't know what to believe. Whereas how much is true? How much is editing? And, uh, cause he claims a lot of it didn't happen. Um,

but what I do know for a fact is I was with him. Like I love all my participants, every single one of them, but the only participant I saw on a consistent basis after the hotel and after going into jail was David. And I think the world of David, David's a great dude. He's a solid dude. Um, you know, he's still in law enforcement. Um, uh, and I know a lot, he gets a lot of hate from the public as being the guy to screw up our

season because as a result of what he did, we all got fooled. But I think the world of David, man, do you know your scheduled last date like are you looking in there saying this is the day i get out and trying to make it to that they don't tell you when you're going to get out um they just say it's going to be between this day and this day um you know um so they don't tell you a specific date but i did do little hash on the on the bottom of my bunk i uh did little hash marks on the uh on the bottom of my bunk i uh did little hash marks every single day so i knew how many days i had in um so yeah i would think you get lost among other hash marks from previous right you just pick your hash mark but

there was a lot of like i looked up at some devilish chick with big boobs the entire time. Yeah, that was... He was a very talented artist, and so I put the hash marks right on her chest. Well, you deprived yourself of a big-titted demon, apparently. That stinks. Well, I tried to give her Bible study, but she didn't talk. She was like the way they made it look in the show.

I am so disappointed, and that's the biggest thing to me. I wanted to ask about the Bible study thing, and we did. And knowing that 7 to 15 people would show up for that, and they made you look like an absolute goober, that is very, that's really unfair. That's not cool. That's part of TV magic. Lots of people talking about how good his bible studies were lots of people too afraid 80 won't show it they were the greatest they were the greatest bible studies

in the history of all bible stuff i've never read it before personally it's long and boring that's a good stuff in there. That's syndicated before electancies. When I watched it, honestly, it did tick me off. There was one part that really upset my wife a little bit in the very, very beginning.

They did it, the officers, the sheriff, the sheriff and all them uh did something that uh they were trying to look out for me but after the edit it made it look like but basically uh they said hey you look like a child a chomo oh yes yeah because and it wasn't sheriff lamb being being just a jerk and saying that Hey, that's what you look like. His whole point was obviously you're not a hardened criminal.

You don't look tough. You don't act tough. Yeah. But that's not what he said. He said, you look like a chomo. Well, I'm going to get to that.

Yes, you're right. Absolutely. But what he did was he did a little role playing with all of us. He did a little role playing thing. This is what people are going to say. We're going to act like it. Act it out.

So you know in your mind what's going to happen. And so that was part of a role-playing exercise. And A&E thought it would be a great idea to have him call me a choma. My wife was a little upset about that one. And you don't want to scare my wife. So, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was bad. This is like the second or third time you've talked about being afraid of your wife. So, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was bad. This is like the second or third time you've talked about being afraid of your wife.

Yeah. She's a ninja. Don't mess with her. I think she was trained in the samurai arts. Ooh, ninja versus samurai. Kyle, I want to see this. I saw that on the History Channel once. But it was still a great experience.

I'm glad I did it. As far as elevating myself to pod boss or to second in charge, that was unexpected. Literally, Josh walked up to me one day. He's like, hey, man, can I talk to you? I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, man, I'm getting ready to get out of here in fact it was uh the following week and he said uh he said look dude you get along with everybody um you know i don't want the white guys to automatically go to war all the time over every little thing he says you

seem like you're a reasonable dude i'm leaving for prison next week. I want you to take over. And I was like, no. He's like, yes. You know, that was awkward. And I'm glad I got pulled before I had to take over because I don't know how that would have happened. You were going to lead the whites, the woods? Yeah. You were going to be the head Nazi dude.

Yeah. I was groomed to be Adolf himself. So I was growing my mustache accordingly. That would have been great. If you grew the mustache. It was just like, hey, what's with the mustache though? We don't do that.

No, not anymore. No, that's... Now we're going to start off with as is tradition with the white people rule anthem. Play the white snake song. Drink some... Yeah. We're going to eat white chocolate

and talk about how much the other races are ass. That's pretty much... You'd be surprised how many conversations I had to listen to from Josh that it was just like, wow. It was like, dude, you really are really are messed up man i did like one scene that was in particular stuck out to me where you know with the editing like you said i don't know if this was one of the first times one of the middle last times you talked to josh but it was you guys talking in the cell cameras looking

at it and the little chiron or whatnot at the bottom is saying like josh is introducing mark to a lot of his ideas and then like it shows you because you're the one facing the camera like nodding like sagely like oh oh interesting interesting fascinating hadn't considered that angle before and then josh turns lord farquaad turns around to leave and then you get towards that camera you just go holy fuck and it's just like you just realize in that moment it's like oh mark's mark's got to pretend to be a to be a white supremacist for the season yeah yeah and so that ultimately actually that meeting you're talking about i think that was where they talked about how us white people are better than the black people and as a a result, we are going to act like it. And I was like, oh, great.

What have I gotten myself into? Hey, how do I tap out? How do I tap out? You're like fucking Steve or he's walking around rubbing both shoulders. I'll go. I'll blow this whole operation. You're a bitch. You're a bitch.

That was what I wanted to see that season more than anything was Steve. Get the absolute shit stomped out of him by someone that would have been satisfying. He, especially after when he threatened to throw the whole everybody under the bus. Like really, he would have ruined the entire season. I know you hate this but he sounds like good content right like like didn't he add

to the flavor of that season if they would have let him do what he threatened to do it literally they would have been like well sorry guys you're all out because he was like threatening because apparently didn't you know who was in the program you guys didn't know but he did that was the vibe i got from the show yeah so unlike any other season in 60 days in history we all met each other prior to going in and uh but he did not want to meet anybody so they kept him as the mystery participant so he knew who we were uh but he we had no idea who he was um and that's part of another another reason why i lost it on him you remember the uh if you remember the uh reunion episode i i was like hey let's let's go outside let's go take take care of this and squash it and um and that's that's

that's why i did that because ultimately at the end of the day, dude, if he had said something, that's our life. So A&E's 60 Days In is highly, highly edited, but I want to go ahead and squash some rumors here right now. A lot of people, what you see on Facebook, say it's staged. It's not staged. I'm not an actor. I've never been an actor. But it is not a staged tv show at all it's it's it is a reality show so they edit the content uh accordingly but uh it's not staged so in reality if he had done that it could have put us in a lot of and in a lot of danger yeah

yeah for sure in fact one thing you don't see on the show, one of the reasons when they pulled me out, as you all know, I was the last male participant to get pulled. But I sat there about a week. It was about a week after David got pulled before they decided to go ahead and pull me. And Abner left about eight hours prior to me getting pulled. He tapped out.

Abner left about eight hours prior to me getting he tapped out. But what happened was the Chicanos had come up with a list of everybody that was in the facility that was from out of state. They're not done. And and there were three people that were on that list. Abner, David and myself. So at this point, okay, David's been pulled. Abner just quit because of, you know, what was that guy's name? I don't even remember the inmate's name anymore. But, you know, he went back and started ratting out Abner. So they were like, okay, wait a minute.

You know, if the Chicanos had put two and two together, they would have said, okay, out of these three guys, two of them are rats. So there was no immediate threat at the time, but the sheriff felt it could come. So we're going to go ahead and pull him. Yeah, better safe than sorry in that situation. You don't want to actually die on 60 Days In. That's not the, you don't want to be the first person to get really into it. Jeff carries the distinction as

being the only participant that's ever been hit by anyone on 60 days in i didn't want to carry the distinction of being the only one that died it just doesn't sound like a good time what made you do it in the first place is there like it was the pay would you want to be on tv like okay so i was a corrections officer when the show came out and And, you know, it's kind of weird. It's probably kind of a funny story. But I was a fan of the show. Not the super fan that they billed me. That was more creative editing.

We're going to make him the super fan. But they had posted something on their Facebook page, probably around season one. And literally I got this crazy message from Facebook on Facebook and it says hey I'm from a casting company we'd love to talk to you about being on a TV show okay yeah and I won the Nigerian too yeah sure sure just send my banking account information yeah I got it I got it But I didn't believe him at first. And so I actually responded very hesitantly.

And I said, OK, what show? Oh, we need you to sign this non-disclosure agreement. Give me your email address. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. That's not how this works. So anyway, I did some research. So this is who I am. I did some research.

I found out it was like it was more I was intrigued. I was like, I'm not committing to be on the show. Am I a fan of the show? Yes. Am I committing? No. But I'll go through the process. And I kept getting elevated. Every time I interviewed a series of phone calls, a bunch of Skype interviews, kept liking me. And so finally, they called me up. And they said, Okay, you've been selected. This is the jail you're going to. This is how much we're paying you. How much are you paying me again? I don't want to. I didn't do it for money, but I'm not going to lie. That helps. We talked prior to the interview.

I can't I can't tell you what I got paid. It was like for two months work. Cool. So I did some research on the jail and I said, okay, he can't be that bad. And so I hesitantly agreed to it. Um, my brother-in-law had, uh, had actually done some time. Uh, he went, he went in for 10 years. And, um, so, you know, at the same time I did hesitantly agree to it, but I was a corrections officer. I have a brother-in-law that's in the system. And, you know, I kind of wanted to see things from his perspective. And so, you know, I agreed to do it because I wanted to see what it was like.

And it's infinitely helped me. As I said at the beginning of the podcast, I'm a law officer now. And it's helped me significantly in my interactions with people. Beforehand, training was consistent of, you know, you can be nice to them, but they're always trying to get over on you. And so understand they're always trying to get over on you. And so understand they're always trying to get over on you. And there are people that do that or that try to get over on you. But ultimately, it made me realize, hold on, I have a lot of officers, especially the young guys, going yelling and screaming at inmates

and treating them inhumanely. in at inmates and treating them inhumanely. And I'm sure you can vouch, but they get treated inhumanely. And I'm like, you know, something's got to give because my brother-in-law is one of those guys. And so it's helped me immensely in my own long career. That's good. Yeah, it seems like a natural kind of pairing with what you do now. That's good.

Yeah, it seems like a natural kind of pairing with what you do now. I have no interest in being on the show. You sure? I can put a call for you. Put a call. Hold the phone on that. So from what you've learned of the three of us so far, who of us do you think in a power ranking system because that's how we do things here.

Power ranking system. Is going to do the best versus the worst on 60 days in as the resident expert. Okay. Love you brother, but I think you would do the worst. Oh rats. I didn't but carry on

Yep And I'll tell you why As much as I like you you're a good dude But you're too damn nice Um Woody I think Woody would do the best I didn't see this coming I'll tell you why

He's quiet he's observant he doesn't really talk a lot, so he observes everything. He's got the glasses thing going on, so he's kind of – and listen, I'm guilty, Woody, all right? You know, we're kind of undervalued, if you will. They're like, oh, he's kind of the nerdy guy, but – I've got worse eyes than both of you. I'm joking. I'm not joking.

But I mean, you know... I'll take my wins where I can get them. I like it. This is a... You know what? Spot on, Mark. This is a bullshit question. He's like, have him back for a second interview. Yes! I thought Taylor being strong,

you might have picked him first. Look at him. He's built for lifting shit. You're quiet. You're observant. You know everything. I don't know. I think you kind of know everything that goes on. Yeah, Woody, you could be the professor. Man, y'all know

before he come in here, he'd be flying around. He's a computer repair man. Can you hack the system, get us out of here? Yeah, it takes 61 days. I heard he owned a mining company. If we all go down together, though though we should start our own gang we'll do the we'll name it after me we'll call it the woods

just a thought well I mean it's already an established brand if you have to buy into it we can be like we're still the woods we're kind of like the confederate flag where now we're going to pretend it's about something different that's a little i was back just to tell you sometimes 60 days in isn't a good isn't a good thing especially if you work in law enforcement i was back in the jail

and this guy is like hey wait a minute you're from the tv show 60 days in and i'm like no no never done what what show is that oh you're from 60 days in no Days In, aren't you? And I'm like, no, no, never done. What show is that? Oh, you're from 60 Days In. No, that's not me. He must be a good-looking dude, though, because if he looks like me, I mean, doggone. And anyway, it turned out this guy was pretty high. He was like a lieutenant in the Aryan Brotherhood, and he wanted to talk to me about how I was able to infiltrate the woods.

So I never, I never had that conversation with wasn't, I wasn't too pleased that he recognized me as the guy that infiltrated the woods. I don't know if I'd want to talk to him either. Yeah. But it would be weird. Wouldn't it? It would be,

you know what I would call cause it'd be too interesting to pass up. You'd be thinking like, what the hell is he going to ask? What's he going to say? What am I going to garner from this conversation? It goes one way or the other because it could be, what'd you do? And I'd be like, yeah, fist bump and this, that, and the other. Or it could be, hey, wait a minute.

I'm a lieutenant in the Aryan Brotherhood. And now I'm going to walk my butt because that'll give me street cred. So I never gave him that opportunity. So it's like the Aryan Brotherhood, the main one, and then the woods. So like the Aryan. Yeah.

And then tied detergent would be, you know, the woods. Which one's the Aryan Brotherhood. I was saying like Johnson and Johnson being the big Aryan Brotherhood. And tied detergent is the woods. Like just one. Oh,

I don't think so. I think it's more of a Dawn versus Palmolive thing, you know, competing peers. No, that might be. I was, I was thinking Tide versus Walmart,

you know, like the offshoot. So the area brotherhood is like, we're the Tide. People know who we are. You guys are starting your bullshit. You know know nobody's buying generic yeah they want to be in the real ab yeah and i did like how some of the air like

i like to imagine myself that if i was in jail and i had to join a gang and i had to be like you did in the woods of the arian brotherhood and you make it high up enough they want to give you a tattoo do you think you so let's say let's say you were in there for real and they get to be like you did in the woods of the Aryan Brotherhood and you make it high up enough, they want to give you a tattoo. Do you think you... So let's say you were in there for real and they get to the point they want to give you a tattoo and you have to accept because now you're second in command. They see you're not tatted up. Do you think it would fly being like,

you know what, guys? One step at a time. Let's start out with the eagle. Just the eagle. With a very generic eagle. Just a generic eagle. You can put some angles on it but let's you know be tactful about it but you can't let them know you you just want the eagle or is it just like now you get a swastika bitch you're part of us now i would imagine i think i would go

for the generic eagle because if someone saw me with my shirt off, I could be like, America, America. You can't really pull that off with a swastika. I didn't know. And then as soon as I leave, I'm just a big fan of Windows 10. I like this idea that Mark becomes the number one guy, the head of whites only one day, and says, you know what?

Now that I'm in charge, we're going to stop being racist. We're going to get along with Now that I'm in charge, we're going to stop being racist. We're just, we're going to get along with everyone. I am in charge. We got it. We got a lot of Bible studies, man.

And a lot of this, I make it mandatory, but you know, people give me crap for fist bumps. This was pre Corona days. Mind you, this bumps give you 95% less bacteria than a handshake. So you can call me a visionary.

That's true. Especially the way you guys are shaking hands where. So you can call me a visionary. That's true. Especially the way you guys are shaking hands where it's grab and pull and grab again. That's spreading so many germs. Yeah. There could be hugs involved. Hugs, kisses. Chest bumps. Well, hold on.

Take a step back. Do you know how easily Corona transmits through the poorest tissue in your asshole. Very easily. Yes, I do know. Don't ask me how. Yes, yes,

I do. I'm COVID paused. I'm not sure about that one. Bit of a bug chaser. I don't like that. I don't like that at all. Well, you know,

it wasn't voluntary. I think that's still one of the most disgusting things we've ever discovered on this show is the bug chasing group of people. Yeah, Mark, if you don't know, there are people out there who aspire to be HIV positive. So they will seek out people who are HIV positive and have sex with them. They're bug chasers. And we found some internet forums where they hang out and share their tales.

And Kyle's not a fan. It's some of the most outrageous... The guy's describing how he went about doing this. Because to say that they seek out people who are HIV positive doesn't doesn't exactly put the the hammer on the head of the nail he just he kind of likes the rushing roulette aspect of just lots of really dirty unprotected sex with strange men and dark places so he's just

describing crawling on the floor and and finding any loose condoms that are laying about and just stuffing those in his butt just to get those extra loads if he can. And it went on and on and on. These people spend very little time in Bible study.

Zero Bible study. Hey Woody, I think I'm with Kyle on this one, man. Yeah, I think we're all on the same team here, Mark. You're painting me on the other side. I mean, Woody is a former bug chaser, yes, but he's reformed. We're all on the same team now. He's a reformed bug chaser. Yes.

He made it out. Mark, I've heard this about jail and prison. Once you get over a certain age, you're kind of not in the game, right? Like if you're over 40 or 45 or something, they don't expect you to be a tough guy. They don't challenge you and see if you stand up for yourself. Is that true? How old do you have to be to get a pass? You know, that's actually a very good question.

How old was I when I went in? I'm trying to think. I was 41 when I went in. Because we did it, we filmed in March through April of 2018. So I was 41. And I wasn't expected to be the tough guy. In fact, our soldiers in the woods were the young kids. So we had some kids that came in and we kind of expected them to do all the work. That was kind of bad, but yeah, I had to play the game, right? So I put some of those

kids to work. But I would say about 40 is the cutoff. When you put them to work, what did they have to do? Oh, they had to do if we wanted someone jumped, they had to go jump them. They usually got to do the drugs, the drug running, if that's the case. They're expected to do stuff like that. I never put them to drug running or anything like that, but I did actually orchestrate an issue where some of the young kids jumped Josh. So Josh was the pod boss, but right towards the end, there was something that happened, and he had one of the white guys kicked out, which is weird because the entire time we encouraged him. If you were a chomo or if you beat women or whatever,

you were pretty much run out of the pod, which means you had to go to a CO and say, hey, I'm moving out. So we made this guy move out. We had a new boss of the Chicanos who had just taken over. I don't remember if the other guy went to prison or if he got out. That was over the Chicanos who had just taken over. I don't remember if the other guy went to prison or if he got out that was over the Chicanos before, but he got really, really ticked off at Josh and said, okay, two people from every race are going to flash you up for 30 seconds. And I stepped up and said, no. And what, okay. So if you're not familiar with the terminology,

flashing you up means they get to beat the crap out of you for 30 seconds and i said no that's not gonna happen we're not gonna have any of the other races jump our pod box um so i had the younger guys jump and flash up uh josh so we could kind of uh and the reason why i did that was to kind of uh uh cool things off and yet let it be known that no other races are going to jump on the lines. That's good decision-making. 30 seconds, that seems like you can live through that, right? If you go full defense, turtle up for 30 seconds, I mean, it's not a good day, but...

Yes and no. Because 30 seconds is a long time to fly. And I know it sounds crazy, uh as a law enforcement officer i've gotten in fights where backup was there within 30 seconds and you're pretty doggone winded yeah and when you're being flashed up you're not allowed to hit back so being hit hit on for 30 seconds isn't fun either. But yeah, I guess it depends on where they hit you. We told them body shots. So, you know, no head, anything like that. But yeah, it sucks.

But you can survive depending on where you get hit. Yeah, as I'm processing it in my head. One, you're right, 30 seconds is completely exhausting. Even just going hard on a heavy bag for 30 seconds will wear you out. And if they hit you in the hip and the butt and the thigh and stuff, then you're probably okay. If they're cracking ribs

and such, then that stinks. Alright, ass punches only. You guys know the rules. Yeah, not the middle though, Kyle. Don't get me out. We need some accuracy. Not you, Derek. I remember last time. You punch with your thumb out, dude. Why are you moving up?

Punch with your thumb out. That's not how you make a fist, Derek. It's Kung Fu Eagle Strikes. No, different kind of fisting. Okay, it's an antedir strike, maybe. Kung Fu Eagle strikes I don't think No Okay It's an antedilute strike maybe We're going for something else 30 seconds at the hands of someone who can't fight

That's okay but 30 seconds at the hands Of a ninja like my boy up there Now that would hurt That would probably yeah That is a problem So you had to lay down ground rules So I even had a whole training with the young guys That is a problem. He had to lay down ground rules. I even had a whole training with the young guys.

Once again, it got left at the editing room floor. I made them get up in the morning and work out. It was almost like not basic training from the standpoint of young, but I made them exercise and stuff like that. That way we had some fit young soldiers. They really screwed you

out of some great moments on there. That stinks. That's got to be very disappointing, especially I'm sure in your head, as you have a big Bible study or a workout session and you forged a relationship with them, in your head, part of it's got to be thinking this is content.

This is going to make me look great. I'm going to look like the king of the castle here. And then you're watching and you're like, uh-huh. Uh-huh. Oh, the Bible. Hun, watch this. Oh, they made me look like a bitch. What the fuck? Yeah.

But that's part of the character arc, right? If he was cool guy from number one, maybe it wouldn't have had the same impact. There's a cool guy from day one, I should have said. Wouldn have had the same impact. There's cool guy from day one. I should have said, wouldn't have the same impact as becoming pretty much the leader of the woods. That's true. Yeah.

And I actually have to agree with Woody there. Yes. I feel like we got cheated on the same token. Seeing the remarkable rise from crazy, awkward fist bumps and yeah. You know, going on the entire pod 50 times to second in charge of the woods so i mean you wouldn't have seen that rise um and i'm not

going to say i didn't raise you know get better but but you would it wouldn't have seemed as dramatic so i will tell you your most popular moment, as far as everybody being pro-Mark, according to my Twitch stream, was when you confronted Steve. Everybody was saying that was very high T. And so that's good. High T, Matt.

High testosterone. Because he was just, he came in there talking, like he was all this, that, and the other. And he was just, he came in there talking like he was all this, that, and the other. And he was named, as I said, if you, and asking him other participants, they added him to where he actually looked better on TV

at the reunion than he was. I can't imagine him looking worse. He looked like such an asshole. But I can't talk bad anymore about my almost dead, but not quite so dead, co-stars anymore. Maybe rest in Louisville, Kentucky. Don't know. Really?

He's just on a huge PI mission right now. Undercover mission. Undercover. Dude, I loved when they talked about, come onto my property. I have landmines. It'll blow you up. I'm like, dude, really? I'm sure the ATF would like to know about that.

Yeah, it's like, are you a retarded person? Who protects their home with landmines? You're being kind of judgmental, Taylor. I mean, what if a stray fox or a dog or a bird lands on a really sensitive one? Then you got a mess and a ruined lawn. What happens if the Secret Service were to stage a raid on his house?

That's true. The Secret Service would be like, Mines, we'll let you keep doing what you're doing, buddy. We don't have machines for this that will trash your yard. You know, that does tickle me about the people that prep, and they save bullets, and they're like, just in case, forever, I'll be ready. I'm like, dude, they can freaking blow you up by flying a grenade into you.

They're not even going to put people in danger at that point. They'll be like, okay, press this button, boom, you're dead dead so tell me how those landmines work out for you steve that's the thing well you're talking about uh doomsday preppers now something i've found with that show is you either laugh at how unprepared they are or you find some motherfucker who's a multi-millionaire from the dot-com boom and you're like oh my god he's genuinely gonna make it he's gonna fucking make it through this isn isn't he? So if you had to go on not another 60 Days In, but a different reality show, what would be your next pick?

Naked and Afraid. Really? Nice. I like that one. No, I wouldn't pick that one either. I don't want to catch a thorn in my nutsack. See, the problem is I'm fat. Not at the end of Naked and Afraid.

You would be thin. I don't think it's long enough to thin you out I think you want survivor for that 21 days with no food these people lose 30-40 pounds sometimes yeah some of them lose some there's one hilarious one no it's really not because they're working constantly all day

and I think it's 21-23 they just fail to find food for 3 weeks it's it's 21 23 they just failed to find food for three weeks it's like our survival trip but three times longer there was one guy who was like big jacked with some some gut on him and he went in at like 230 pounds and the woman he was with went in at like 1 130 or something for easy math and by the end of it they have the side by side photos and she lost and because she insisted they have a 50 50 food split oh no he went he lost 40 pounds and she lost like six and so you see his before and after and he is now the kind of shredded where it's like dude you need a cup of water. Yeah.

Well, Oh no. Dehydration is big part of the weight loss. It's not all fat. Yeah. He didn't lose 40 pounds of fat in three weeks. He lost a ton of water weight and probably 20 pounds of fat or something. And some muscle.

And a lot of muscle. Yeah. Yeah. I will say, I will say what's cool about being on the show is, you know, I'm on, I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, is you get people that follow you from all sorts of different reality shows. So it's almost like reality stars unite! So I've had actually conversations, actually a lot of them, uh is that a big brother i think i would think big

brother would be kind of cool but it's all a bunch of young kids so i think they would tick me off i would want to do survivor survivor still seems like the cool one yeah i've got a survivor as well that follows me i think that would be semi-cool but it could suck at the same time i used to want to do what was the joe rogan one with the bravery fear factor if your fact is the one i wanted to do i don't want to eat roaches yeah i i drink cum those would be the hardest ones for me they crawl all over you and up your nose i thought i'd be fine tolerating insects crawling on me a lot of them were like uh climbing based or water based. I thought I'd be fine tolerating insects crawling on me. A lot of them were

climbing-based or water-based and I thought I'd do really well on that. It's if I could just make it through the eating challenges. I thought I'd do well on that show. I know I would gag. I would just vomit. Even if I could force myself to put those camel spiders in my mouth, I know I'd just throw them off.

You gotta do what Homer Simpson did for that spicy chili challenge is you drink a bunch of wax coats the liquid wax coats the inside of your mouth and then you can eat any amount of spicy chili it worked for homer simpson about 20 years ago yeah actually no the more i'm thinking about that episode is it actually didn't work so that's right he had that psychedelic trip right after and it goes on for like five minutes. Yeah, where he sees the fox on the fucking

Arizona plane or whatever. He takes a step forward and the sun comes up. Step back and it goes down. Up, down, up, down, up, down, up, down. And then it like cracks on the horizon and breaks. And he's like, oh, oh, oh no, oh no. Dude, Old Simpsons is so good. I can't bring myself to watch a new episode.

Is it bad now? I haven't seen a new episode. It's terrible. It's not as good. I mean, during its golden age, you could just look at the writers that were working on that show. It's incredible. It was very talented.

The writers turned out to be big writers and important people. Conan O'Brien comes to mind. But who's to say that these batch of writers won't turn into great people? Me. It's bad. It's not as good anymore. It's just not as funny. I haven't seen it, so I wouldn't know. Hey, so y'all asked me a question earlier, and you wanted me to rate you

on who would do best in a gel setting versus... I already know I'm last. And I still love you. Nothing but love. He's restacking it. This isn't going to be good. Yes. But there's a lot of social media traffic. I want to ask you guys. It says I talk and I sound like Hank Hill. So I'm going to say something real quick,

and I want to get y'all's vote. Do I sound like Hank Hill? Hold on. Check this out. Damn it, Bobby. Yes or no? Damn it, Bobby. You don't sound like Hank.

Yeah. You don't think so? I see it. No, I see it. I hear it too. I hear a little bit of it. Yeah.

You need to, I'm trying to, I need a good phrase from, Oh, Bobby, do you know what the plaza is? It's worth a gaze. Go dancing.

Yeah. That's a good one. Yeah. And I'm, and I'm ripping that straight from some other impressionist because if you can listen to an impressionist to do a sentence it is so much easier than doing it from the person because it's like i think even anthony can be talked about this like you listen to someone do an impression of someone else you're like oh that's the cadence

you need that they figured out the formula and then you can just take their work repurpose it you know this is a whole new language my impressions are so bad if you were to tell me how you listen to music and then instantly know all the notes and can play it yourself it would be just as foreign to me i don't know how you do that impressions are hard impressions are fun i like i like trying to get certain impressions to resonate in the uh in the shower you know those are fun you hank hill actually ironically that's one of the good ones you can get his oh like if you extend that you can get that i like to think taylor's in the shower solo doing that repeatedly his girlfriend's like what are you doing i'm right here new drugs when you could just mow the lawn that show is a a brilliant show glad to hear that you're oh it's

come on kyle it's okay no it's not it's great just okay it doesn't make you laugh out loud and you don't like the way that it kind of develops characters a little better. Not better necessarily, but different with shows like Family Guy. I like the episodes when Hank's dad's on, and I like the Bill episodes when we go back in time and we do the Billdozer. I love that. And Project Walrus Man. I like all that.

But Hank's day-to-day life and bobby and con jr and all that i'm just like man well con jr sucks and con senior sucks they're not that interesting peggy can be annoying but the gang you know bobby hank bill boomer i like everything with Dale and Bill. I don't like Hank and I like Hank's dad. That's it. Um, I like those three characters. And,

uh, if, if anything else, if it's like a Bobby centric episode, I'm just not into it. So before we lose Mark, Mark, your police officer right now,

police officers getting a lot of attention in social media and in the world, where are they right? Where are they wrong? Ooh, I'm going to get some hate no matter what i say thanks for throwing it's a well-designed question what do you want to be disliked for so obviously the big hot button issue now is george floyd and systemic racism. I have not yet met a single officer that believes that the killing of George Floyd was justified. No, you can't sit on a guy's frickin' road for minutes at any point ever justify that. And that's where, you know, I know we're getting a bad rap right now, those of us that are in law enforcement, we're getting a bad rap right now. Those of us that are in law enforcement, we're getting a bad rap right now.

But this is one of the things that, as I said, I've yet to meet one single officer that agrees that that was a good thing. So are we right? I think we need to work on people. As I said, one of the things I did in the show was I got to see things from the other side. So I'm not going to say all the DOs were bad, and that was one thing about the show, that they didn't concentrate on the good DOs. You know, I'm sure having done 60 days in federal prison, you know, you would say there were a few good COs.

There are a lot of good officers out there. And unfortunately, almost like it seems like lumped together with all the bad officers. I would say there are a lot more good officers than bad officers. But I mean, if we're going to have an honest dialogue about racism in America or police brutality, we've got to also say, hey, there are some bad officers out there, and there absolutely are. and get them out of law enforcement. But on the same token, I think the general public has to understand that 90% of, I would say the majority of officers, 90% of officers are good officers and we're just doing a tough job. The criticism is if 90% are good, let's say 90% looks the other way regarding the bad.

They are there to enforce the law. You could take the George Floyd incident. There were four people there. Are all four of them that 10%? Is that the argument? Or maybe some of those guys just go along too easily. I think, and I'm only going on what I'm trying to remember here. On the George Floyd incident, they were all rookies.

Had just like one of them had only been on the week. And I think when, when you're new, you automatically defer to the senior. Um, but no, I think we have to root out bad where they're bad and we have to call it out.

The problem is just like where, whatever it is you guys do, you know, you might have a really bad employee, and no matter what you say, it's up to the administration to – it's up to management to handle the disciplinary issues. But I will tell you there is no – we don't go to shift briefings, and at no point do they say, hey, today we go kill a person that doesn't happen and i think we get an unfair an unfair rap uh-oh go ahead i think sometimes they do i mean so there's been you're like that never happens well it probably happens sometimes okay in my yeah and and i don't think that i don't think i think it's a false comparison to say that whatever jobs that we might do, there might be another employee that's doing something

wrong and it's not really on us. Law enforcement, it literally is their job to enforce the law. I think that you've talked earlier about how in the Army and in law enforcement, you don't see color. I definitely believe that's true.

You don't see white. You don't see black black or brown but i think they definitely see blue and green you know i i think that in the army i think you're going to see green i think yeah we're on the same team here we're all green and and in the in the police force i think yeah we're all blue here they're they're not i think there's a lot of of that that goes on. It's interesting this week. I see so many of the Atlanta police department stepping off the job. I saw that. Yeah. I'm thrilled about that. They should just get fired, right?

Like if you want to self-identify as someone who's in support of, for example, shooting an unarmed guy running away in the back. Great. I'm glad you self-identified. I appreciate that. Here we thought we were going to have to figure out which one of you were in favor of that, and now you come forward and tell us. Congratulations.

If they're not showing up for work, they're already, you know, they take an oath as a police officer. They're already going against their oath. Just go ahead and let those people go. You can't just not go to work in any job, or of course you get fired. If the challenge is figuring out which ones are the bad ones and then they come forward and say it's me thank you for your help yeah yeah well i think there are officers out there that

have forgot their homes they forgot it is a people it's a people i mean it is a public service job which means i work for the public. Yes, there are times I can't be nice. There are times I have to do a job. But for the most part, what I will tell people that I talk with is you dictate the level of nicety or the level of service that I'm going to give you. In other words, if you're cool, I'm going to be cool. And I think you guys know me well enough, especially watching my shows, my personality on the show doesn't differ than in law enforcement. And if anything, as I said, having done the show,

it opened my eyes to people that are stuck in the system. You know, yeah, there are people, and I think no matter what side of the political aisle you sit, we'll all agree, there are people that deserve to be imprisoned for the rest of their life, period. But then there are oftentimes there are people that it's an addiction issue. It's a whatever issue it may be. Let's get to the root of the problem. I'm a big proponent of rehab. I'm a big proponent of, you know, people aren't going to change until we figure out what the issue is and we can and we can address that issue um you can keep them incarcerated and then it's just a big a big circle of reincarceration um but let's let's figure out hey are they addicted get them off the drug let's get them off fight the addiction because oftentimes these guys will come in and they'll suitcase in drugs and they're just as messed up in jail as

they were on the street let's give them a chance let's give people a fighting chance um to overcome whatever it is yes the people that commit murder the people that commit rape the you know the people that deserve to be in prison they need to to be. But a good majority of people, I think, you know, we need to address it. And I think as an officer, you can't forget that, that, you know, you're in people serving business. Yes, there are some interactions that I have that don't end and, you know, with the greatest of outcomes, you know, but many more, much more often than that, you know, um, I try to be as nice to people as I possibly can. Um, you know, to each his own, I guess.

But as I said, just doing the show has, I think, helped me in my career because, you know, I don't go in yelling and screaming at people. There are some times you have to be fair and all that, you know. But that's, in fact, actually, that's one of the key words. You always, you have to be fair, but you have to be fair. And I think you always have to be fair. You know, I'm not going to go in there treating every person I interact with like some jerk and I understand the majority of them

I understand they're all people even the people that are that are murderers, rapists the truly evil ones the truly evil ones, I still treat them like people, i've got a

job to do and i believe you should be in prison for the rest of your life on some of them that doesn't mean i have to you know uh treat you like crap in the process of doing i think most people would definitely be on board with your rehab point of view like if it's if it's a war on drug style thing where someone's in there for fucking ever because of some drug charge in the late eighties, like of course it's better for us as a society to, to get those people rehab than it is to have them just in prison, probably causing more problems than they would otherwise if they were clean, because now they've got a drug addiction and they're trying to do whatever

they can to fulfill it while in jail causing violence or whatever else. So I met a guy who goes to prisons and he teaches decision making courses and his pitch to me was kind of interesting because he's like they're all in there for decision making and my knee-jerk response was like yeah well like they're all decision making right every every second of life is one decision or another what do you really mean but these guys are considering options that most people just don't have on the table. You know, I need some money. Should I knock over a liquor store? Yes or no? Right? We've never thought about that. We've never thought of that as a viable way to

get some extra cash, rob a convenience store or liquor store or what have you. And he's just trying to reprogram people to some extent so that they just say, you know what? The cost benefit on that is not a winning outcome. You know, even if this goes well and I get $75, I eventually get caught and get three years. This sucks. A lot of people that commit burglaries, you know, robberies, it stems from some other issue. That's why they're committing the crimes.

Do in some of those cases, do they deserve prison time? Absolutely. However, once again, let's look at the issue. Why did he? Because sometimes armed robbers, they do it, and I'm not saying it's right at all. So, hey, if my department's watching this, at no point am I saying that armed robbery is good. But they might be committing these crimes because of an addiction or, hey, here's a big one, is what's your family

upbringing? What was your upbringing like? You know, we model our parents whether you want to or not. Now, sometimes that's good, sometimes that's bad, sometimes that's bad. So let's... I'm not a big proponent of what they call defund the police, but someone explained it to me. Hold on, actually, let me take it back. A buddy of mine is a criminal defense attorney,

and he said, we're not saying defund the police. We're saying let them get back to fighting crime. Let's deal with the issues, you know, some of the other issues, law enforcement's being called out to, let the professionals deal with that because we're acknowledging you guys are working a lot harder than you need to. You need to be fighting crime, not being a counselor, you know, psychologist, social worker. The skill set required for a policeman is too broad, right? You guys are sometimes dog catchers. You're sometimes dealing with the homeless.

You're sometimes dealing with the addicted. You're sometimes dealing with the, you know, armed robbery. If we could maybe have someone else deal, like if there's a homeless guy and he's whatever, stopping customers from going into a store, that doesn't need to be a policeman in there. That could be some other kind of specialist who helps them get back on their feet and puts them in a program.

The vagrant squad. Sure. And there's- Those guys don't need guns. They need clubs. Because some of those hobos, they won't feel a gunshot. You've got to really pound it. You've got to send the message home.

I'm thinking Negan from Walking Dead, right? Yes. One of those bats with the wire on. Or even better, we can decide one city that we all as Americans are okay with making shitty, and then we will incentivize every homeless man everywhere. No. You're halfway there, Taylor.

You know what? Actually, I disagree with this. Chicago? Because the obvious solution to this would be St. Louis. You know, I watched Escape from New York. It's St. Louis or Detroit. Take your pick. New York's already an island.

New York is already an island, right? We could just duck down the bridges and put them there. They made a movie about that. Yeah, it was a good movie. Isn't that how Australia started? Isn't this just Australia? Isn't that how Australia began? Look how well that worked out.

Yeah, it was an island of convicts from England. They just went and dropped off. And now look at them. Now they've got fun things to do down there. A lot of fun, not a lot of crime. Kind of racist to the Aboriginal folk. Some good coral reefs, I hear. Yeah, good coral reefs for now.

You know, get in while it's hot. Yeah, because it's probably going to be gone. Well, one thing I would use this platform to say, guys, don't hate us. Don't hate all law. You're anti-blue.

Don't understand. We're people, too. Yes, there are bad. So are the Nazis. And we agree. too yes there are bad so are the nazis and we agree some of them are bad some of the nazis some of them wait a minute probably okay see josh was misunderstood see the pod boss he was just misunderstood no but uh maybe don't hate us all yes there, there are bad, but there are many more good. I like you. Well, I certainly don't hate you, Mark. I think you're a very likable guy. Everybody's going to like

you. Hey, I'll treat all of y'all to a beer. Sounds like a plan. I'll drink the coke, though. I'm not allowed alcohol. Well, by that that point you will be I'll get you a cherry coke

maybe I'll get you a jack and coke virgin jack and coke that's what I'll get you it's just coke I know thank you so much for coming on Mark we really really appreciate it

we'll have to have Chiz talk to you about hooking up the next person I know a a lot of people wanted on maybe a couple months from now is Nate, who stormed through two seasons very successfully. So that would be very neat. But thank you so much for coming on, man. You had a lot of interesting takes. I am so, I'm like upset on your behalf about the Bible story. That is, that is sticking with me. That is so unfair. That is having 17 people in there and them editing it to make it look like

you're just some goob playing by yourself. That's what it is. Hey, one thing before I go, I'd like to talk to you guys about a lot of people want to know what's going on with Dylan. Dylan was the kid that got jumped because he wanted to hang out with us. He's doing really, really good.

I talked to him. He's got a couple of months left in the Senate, and he is planning on starting his life. He's doing excellent, though, and we talk quite a bit. Good. But he is doing very, very well, and I just wanted to update that and so you all know that, hey, he's a great kid. He really is a great kid.

And I think he committed, once again, a guy that he committed burglary to feed his drug addiction. So he's about to wrap that up. He's got about two months left, and he'll be out. That's awesome. I'm glad you're doing well. Yeah. Got a good role model in you. Hey, I'm going to follow all you guys

on social media. Make sure I get your social media. Don't subject yourself to that. Chisel, make sure he'll hook you up with every link you need. Is there anything you're promoting or shouting out? Or just came on to chat? Hey, if y'all want to follow me at TheRealMark60 on Twitter or on Instagram,

at TheRealMark60, Mark with a K. I just live life on there. Sometimes it's social media. I mean, sometimes it's 60 Days In stuff. Oftentimes it's words of positivity because I really think we should just be kind to each other. That's what I think would solve a lot of world's problems.

If we were just respectful and kind to one another, we'd see a lot of good come out of this. Hey, I love you guys. Thank you all for having me on today. Thank you so much for coming on, man. Have a good one. Talk to you all later. Take care.

Pig. You asshole. Woody's face was so good. My look of disapproval. Don't talk shit on my man Mark I'm just kidding to people who are watching I turned his volume up all the way in discord that was the best it could get he was using an iPhone

and that's what it sounds like oh I thought it was good for me it sounded good on my end too oh he was cutting out sometimes towards the end he was for For me in the very... You guys have lower standards than our viewers. And also, sometimes it sounds worse for them. Like I know in my car it sounds worse than it does on my computer.

Yeah, I think that what I get in my ears is very different than what like goes to you and then gets recorded and then cut. No, it sounds fucking great to me. And it's not until I go to my car that i hear what people are complaining about or some other yeah and i at this point i listened through speakers and three different headsets sounds amazing and then like i need to find i've heard in earbuds make it sound bad so i'm gonna try that too and uh like i yeah so anyway it's harder than you'd think no i believe it I can't stand those

in earbuds. They hurt my ears so much. Do you try the foam ones? Like the smushy ones? I didn't know there were smushy ones, but the Apple ones are hard. I'm not a fan also. I just wear this headset if I'm listening to music on the go.

I drive everywhere with this on. Yeah, I am. I'm kidding. That would be incredibly dangerous. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For sweaty things. I always keep one ear out to hear traffic. I prefer earbuds for sweaty stuff, like mulling or exercising or what have you.

Now, it isn't something you would expect, but I am getting a lot of Google ads for high-quality calipers now. Because I purchased those one-head sizing calipers, which, Oh, here, here's a side little thing before Kyle, I know we need to hit some ads soon is I, I was going into the head measuring thing. For those of you who don't, didn't see it, Taylor Merca on Twitch, we're taking that fucking platform by storm is 2000 subs I measured my head with a caliper and there is actually a Wikipedia page for all of the

common measurements for the human skull there's 13 of them and let me let me read to you the percentages I got and I gotta find the actual while you look it up when hope was born she was a gigantic baby she was nine pounds nine ants nine ounces and then she just got bigger from there and if you don't know they measure babies in length weight and head circumference i always

looked at those scores like they were school grades if she wasn't in like the mid 90s or something it's like we gotta feed this kid more she's turned into like a b plus child you know 89 in length like what the fuck i have an a child not some not some 89th percentile some bitch So I have a feeling that Taylor is going to be an A child. Yes. I'm trying to find in my fucking browsing history

where this fucking shit was. Regardless, there's a bunch of measurements where it's like measure from the bottom of the chin to the top of the head. Measure from the center of each people, the center of the other pupil. Measure this. Measure your jaw.

Measure jaw to nose. All of them. And I genuinely went into this thinking like, oh, man, this might ruin a little bit of the big head bit. Because I know I have a big head. But I thought it was going to be like on the above average side. No, not even close. There were a lot of times during the measurements that I would like pull it off and look at it and then look at the averages. That can't be right. And then, and then put it back on because it broke down on it. It would say, this is like the, if you're in the 1% with really small head,

then here's the 25, here's the 50, here's the 75, the 95 and the 99%. And so there were, there were 13 measurements, each of these different areas. And here are the percentiles that I scored in 99th percentile, 78th percentile, 80th percentile, 99th percentile, 78th percentile, 80th percentile, 99th percentile, 99th percentile, 99th percentile, 87th percentile, 99th percentile, 93rd percentile, 60th percentile, which I realized later was an error. It was actually 99th percentile, 99th percentile, 96th percentile, 99th percentile, 96th percentile, 99th percentile, 99th percentile. And so I genuinely do have an enormous score. What did you did you get 78th was that one of the early numbers yeah it was i think that was

i think that was like the the eye i was guessing that one yeah yeah yeah i think my eye difference is is pretty normal ish but it's just the rest of this shit just adding up, adding up. And so, yeah, I really thought I would get better scores than that, or better, you know, what would be better, but still. They say big brains aren't related to intelligence, but don't they have to be, right? Is it a big brain? Like, I know, I know they're going to say, no, Woody, it's the surface area, it's the amount of folds, etc.

All else put even, if all factors are equal, the bigger wrinkly brain has more surface area than the smaller wrinkly brain. That's correct. That's why it's not people. And if we go to the animal kingdom, right? Dumb things like birds and ants have small brains. And smart things like humans and dolphins have big brains. I feel like this brain size intelligence link is more appropriate on target than people say. There's a couple of different ways.

So one is that's why some researchers are like Neanderthals were even smarter than we are because they had more brain capacity in the skull. But there's also stuff I've seen where it's like, it's more about brain size to body ratio so like our brain to body ratio is insanely high higher than anything else in the animal kingdom it's not even close whereas like a blue whale which does have a very large brain and is smart it has a brain way bigger than ours even though it's way bigger they do like that

proportionality towards the size of its body and And of course, a blue whale can't do calculus. Neither can I. But no matter how smart a blue whale is, it's not going to figure that shit out, even if it had little whale fingers. And so the brain proportionality to the size of body seems to make sense. I get that as a trend and something that might be true. I don't know why it would be true. I don't know why it would be true. Right. Why is it that a big brain in a big animal is not as effective as a medium

sized brain in a small animal? We're out of my depth now. I just remember in a biology class learning that and being like, God damn, that does make sense because those whales have some big ass brains and I'm smarter than whales this is a really bright whale i mean i don't know how to maybe they just if they had thumbs then you know they would have been figuring things out in a different way if dolphins had thumbs

we would have bigger problems than china i tell you. They'd be causing problems on the coast. Just stay out of the water. Just stay out of the water. They can breathe air. They'll evolve their way out. How far inland are they going to waddle? I don't know. If they get thumbs, they go in a whole new direction. Yeah, I guess it's your guys' problem. They're not making it to St. Louis.

You're not making it to Atlanta. It's like 300 miles or something. Well, then Woody's the one to be in trouble I guess how far is Raleigh from the coast? it's a three hour drive I always picture in my head

if I was one of those people who lived close to the ocean I would go to the ocean all the time and then I really think about myself and it's like three hours, a three hour drive. No, no,

no, I don't want to do that. Three hours is close to you. I used to live two blocks from the ocean. I did go to the ocean all the time. It was, I was saying for you, you're the closest one.

And I've never, I can't imagine. I hate the ocean so much. I would, whenever I'm in a city like that has an ocean, it's rare that I even go. Like if I'm in LA, I'm not going to the beach. No fucking way. When I'm in a city that has an ocean, it's rare that I even go. If I'm in LA, I'm not going to the beach. There's no fucking way.

Last time I was in Cocoa Beach in Florida. I didn't go to the beach. No. Oh, I hate it. It's all sandy and salty. It's salt water. You get to experience nature and see little critters that bury into the sand and go look for fish. I like the ocean.

And I'm good at it. Is the door of the explorer over there? You're going to go look for fish? Yes, I'm going to go to the guy who's renting out dirty snorkels, and then I'm going to pop it in my mouth and go look for critters. Yeah. Absolutely going to do that. Not on the East Coast, you're not. You can hardly see a foot through the water.

I will look for them there. There's a swamp out there. I mean, there was some... Where I was in Florida, I guess that was more like Panhandle. That was alright. When I went to the British Virgin Islands when I was like 15 or so, crystal clear, you could see lots of cool fish

from a ways away, like the schools swimming when you're under there, even close to the shore. That was neat. Where was this? That was in the British Virgin Islands islands well in the caribbean right is that what that is okay yeah yeah good stuff they had cool ocean what's the best the best ocean you've ever been in what he said i forget the name of it i've been to some that are ranked best in the world uh but whatever like you get to a certain level and all right it's perfectly clear you're in some sort of cove usually there's no waves so my personal i guess if you were to ask me i'd say hawaii i like the black sand that was kind of a novelty and there was waves that you could play in and do. And the facilities were good. So you could rent like surfboards

or kayaks and shit like that. So I had a really good time in Hawaii on the beach. Other people prefer oceans that are just like saltwater lakes or something, you know, where they're protected and there's palm trees and stuff. But that to me is boring. I remember being at,

and this is almost a equivalent to like going what do you understand this going to a men's league hockey thing and seeing someone who's so much better than you that it it intimidates you to the point of like man my foot hurts i want to go home but i remember being like 12 13 and nobody's judging 12 13 year old kids on the beach when i was in hawaii and i would like want to go boogie board, but I would see surfers out there like real deal surfers. And I'd be like, I'm embarrassed. I don't want to go boogie board in front of the surfers.

Cause like when you're 12, you like give, you think that they care more. Yeah. Yeah. When in reality, like they didn't obviously give a shit. They're having a fun time on their own.

But yeah, I still remember that being like, Oh, I'm going to, I'm going to look so lame. I'm going to lay on my belly on these little leftover waves that being like oh i'm gonna i'm gonna look so lame next to my belly on these little leftover waves that they already finished i would just yeah surfers are not interested in the same part of the wave that you are right they want the bigger part and they want the unbroken part that's next to the broken part that's the area closest to the

curl is where they live a boogie boarder especially a new, tends to just get pushed by the whitewater. There's no surfers competing for that. No, definitely not. What is this hockey thing you linked, Kyle? Read through it while I do the ad. It's just more news about your disgusting sport. Oh, that's not fair. Well, it's fair if you read the article. Read the very bright article.

Is your home Wi-Fi struggling? It is bright. Look at you. You're glowing now. Good God. TheHockeyNews.com. The play. Ken Campbell, put on dark mode.

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Yep. Reading this right now. Hmm. You guys do one Kyle. I was going to, but now I will tell everyone about GOAT. If you're buying sneakers online, there's a good chance that the shoe you're looking at is fake. How can you be sure that it's real?

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you won't find better prices for 100% verified authentic sneakers anywhere online. Find the perfect 100% authentic sneaker at GOAT.com slash PKA. That's GOAT.com slash PKA. Yeah. Check them out. That's how you prevent yourself from getting ripped off with imitation sneakers spelled goat g-o-a-t dot com slash pka so kyle this article you linked this is some hardcore fucking hazing right here this i'm going to read some of this is and this is a this is nhl this is a couple minor league teams, different minor leagues.

There's OHL, CHL, a lot of different ones, QMJHL. A lot of these are accused of this. And so here's just the first paragraph, and it goes on for pages. Launched in Toronto on Thursday afternoon against the Canadian Hockey League, the Western League and the Ontario League and the Quebec League was brought forth by Daniel Carcillo and Garrett Taylor and the allegations are explosive and disturbing. According to the lawsuit, players in the class were

among other things forced to masturbate in front of teammates and coaches and forced to sexually assault teammates to consume saliva, urine, semen, and feces. I didn't see that. Other players and to sexually engage with animals. Animals? Players had heavy objects tied to their genitals,

had their genitals dipped in irritants and toxic liquids and had objects such as hockey sticks, brooms and food forced into their anuses. Consume large amounts of alcohol and illicit drugs. That part is why would they add that sentence? I feel like they just like, Oh, you thought they were doing this sober? No, Why would they add that sentence? I feel like they just like... It was long enough at the end.

Oh, you thought they were doing this sober? No, but like, it's weird to me because they're like, dude, there was some hardcore stuff going. They had to consume saliva, urine, semen. Oh, and they fucked animals too. I'm like, how does that just... That's the lead, right? Am I...

I'm with you a thousand percent. They're like shoving eggs up people's asses? They had to engage in sexual acts with animals. First of all, be more specific. What kind of animals? Because if it's the mascot for the team, that is hilarious. If it is the mascot for the rival team,

bonkers, head on the ceiling, hilarious. If that's the case, I need to know. If the rival team is the Penguins, and you're like, fuck a Penguin! And you're standing there

face to beak with a poor Penguin. A poor Penguin. Where'd you get this? She's like, I'm really not affiliated with Sidney Crosby. Where did you find a penguin? I don't know what they're asking me to do to a penguin. If they

brought out an actual penguin, I'd be like, I gotta call the police. Let me read some of this stuff. During showers, rookies were required to sit in the middle of the shower room naked while older players urinated, spat saliva, and tobacco chew on them. At least once, the head coach walked into the shower

while this was happening, laughed, and walked out. Rookies were repetitively hit on the buttocks with a sawed-off goalie stick, developing large welts and open sores. The injuries were so bad they couldn't sit down, even while attending local high school classes. They advised the teams of the abuse, and it did not stop. On road trips, rookies would be stripped naked and sent into the bus bathroom eight at a time.

The older players would tape the boys' clothes up in a ball, which were thrown into the bathroom. The boys were not allowed out until they were dressed, which could take hours. What? I'm missing something. Older players would pour chewed saliva and urine on them through the bathroom vents. This took place in front of coaches and trainers. Rookies had to bob for apples in a cooler filled with the older players' urine, saliva, and other bodily fluids. The older players would put the rookies in a laundry bin on wheels,

four at a time. They would run the laundry bin into a wall as fast as it would go. Players suffering injuries, including being knocked unconscious. It was called the Rookie Rocket. Wait, wait, wait. What was it called? The Rookie Rocket. Older players would organize orgies at

house parties. Rookies were required to take part in sexual acts while the older players watched and took part. The head coach walked in on a naked rookie taped to a table with his buttocks in the air. The older players were whipping him with the belt. The head coach took part, whipped the child and laughed while the boy cried.

Jesus Christ. Are you trying to make a good hockey team here? That's most of the good stuff. I'm reading ahead. Yeah. You get the g most of the good stuff. I'm reading ahead. You get the gist of it. The head coach provided the team credit card to one of the older players to buy alcohol for the team rookie

party. The 16 and 17 year old rookies were required to dress up in women's clothing and forced to consume large amounts of alcohol to the point of blacking out and vomiting. Lots of stuff like that don't stop oh my god that was so during team practices the head coach took taylor aside and demanded that he fight other 16 and 17 year old players to increase the intensity level of the team this

took place numerous times taylor was sincerely I'm sorry, Taylor was seriously concussed during one fight in practice and he and other team members suffered injuries during fights. Yeah, man. Some hazing. Is this what it was like for you, Woody? In what? No. Men's League and B-League, Men's League

hockey. Alright, Matt. It's your first day here. Hop on the table and strip down yeah welcome to the rookie rocket so welcome to jackass this is a rookie rocket my team had like a lot of professionals on it there are like different kinds of engineers packaging engineers a guy manage a golf club probably made more than all of us and like that but if you got there early or stayed late in in hockey there are some magic numbers 10 is really good 12 13 are good but if your player if your team has 11 players then you're

kind of fucked and it's hard to do like the rotations it taylor knows so what would happen is i'd stick around and be like hey i see you've got 11 but if you had me it would be 12 you know would you like to pick me up and i'd get yeses a lot these other teams weren't like ours they had fucking strippers in the locker room and stuff so yeah like legit strippers and i'm in there and it's like huh you know it kind of feels like i'm the stripper too but okay because you know you get totally naked you're putting a cup on and everything like this is the whole deal and uh so yeah that had that going on but it wasn't quite comparing to this no i i didn't know i played hockey as a high schooler not nearly at the level these guys are

playing at but higher than high school aren't you glad no no hazing of the kind like if a coach would have come in and even seen you like talking shit or bullying some new player like you would have been sat it would have been like no that's not what the team is you don't talk so so taylor i'm sure like in the back of your head you you thought man maybe if i committed a little more maybe i tried a little harder maybe if i just had a little bit of an edge, I could have gotten to the pros maybe. Maybe that was a possibility. Maybe in all the alternate realities that exist, there's a Taylor out there somewhere,

and he's playing goalie for the Blues. After this, though, after reading this, is that little part of you going, whew, we dodged a bullet, didn't we? Oh, come on. I'm glad. Something crazy that I guarantee, the goalies were not getting fucked with this way

because you do not psychologically fuck with your – this is something that's very – Woody, you can back me up. Goalie is a very psychological position. No team wants to bring on a new goalie that's promising and immediately start hazing him. Being a goalie – So which positions benefit from psychological torture? Enforcer. So if you're a forward, if you can get in the head of your forward, make him cry himself to sleep at night.

Man, does he play hard. Maybe your enforcer, Taylor, huh? Like, fuck with that guy a little bit. Make him a psycho. If it's the enforcer, yeah. But, like, even that. Like, I'm just saying being a goalie is like being we've been raping donnie all week he's gonna crack some fucking skulls he's still a man hat trick you know he was skating kind of wonky but he

but he scored his shots on taylor let me ask you this right so perhaps you've shared the dream of being a professional athlete. I think most guys have. I've certainly won daydream. Everybody who plays sports thought about it, of course. Yeah. Now, would you take a little hockey stick up the anus in exchange for playing for the Blues? Yes.

It's a good deal, right? I'd take a lot of hockey stick up the anus. I don't think I'd tape the big knob on it that I normally do. How much, how much literal shit can a man eat before he's just like, you know, I mean, I,

uh, counting sounds fun. You know, I would take a lot of shit. I don't, I don't think Kuntar is going to spit in my eye every day. We're going over the numbers for the Jefferson account. So, you know, the team are like, you're going over the numbers for the Jefferson account.

The team are like, you're complaining at this? You're a bitch. I escaped Gulag to complain. That's some serious fucking hazing. I had no idea stuff that intense was going on. Allegedly. We'll see. I guess we won't see because I'm never Allegedly. This guy was no joke too.

How do you pronounce his name? Cicerelli? Carcillo. Yeah, he played for the 2010 Hawks. But I don't know how much he actually played for them. Let's see. Let's see. He played as much as he could with the injuries he sustained.

Well, this was when he played for the Blackhawks, and that is – Oh, wait. Embarking on a pro career that lasted 10 days? The Blackhawks? No, Daniel Carcillo. He played almost 500 games total. Oh, I switched. I moved on to Taylor without realizing it.

Oh, he played... Okay. Won the Stanley Cup, I guess it was 2013 with the Hawks. Only played four games in that postseason. Had one assist. So, you still got your name on the Hawks. Only played four games in that postseason, had one assist. So you still got your name on the cup, so pretty fucking cool, dude. And those guys who scored one assist are better than – they could go over to Europe or Russia and play

and just absolutely be the Harlem Globetrotter version. Is that true? It seems like nowadays the Swedish Olympic team or something, they're competitors in it. Canada doesn't win every year. Russia doesn't win every year. Russia wins. The national teams are very different. Canada is always

so fucking stacked. Russia's very good. Sweden is getting up there as being good. Germany, their team's not good, but they have a couple of players like... America's in it The US is in it Don't get away from the rape and abuse, boys Who cares about the standings in Europe?

They're eating shit You know what? Thanks for bringing me back to Earth You know, Slovenia's got quite the team this year No! They called a rookie rocket. You know what? The first time I met you, Kyle, you put me in a rookie rocket in the parking lot of a fucking Walmart. Welcome to YouTube, bitch.

Yes. That's what it was. I got hazed, and then Woody and Kyle made me eat their cum and shit. Are you sure this is going to get me subs? I didn't eat all that hutch cum to not take my turn when it was time. I ate it from Hutch and C. Danners and by God, you're going to eat it from me. Everyone thinks C. Danners is so nice, but you haven't sucked his dick like I have. Hello, everybody.

Time to eat my cum. Yeah, that shit that is some fucking intense hazing that is you know it's next level it's too much the one that was actually funny though like i could get on board with was when they took like eight rookies stripped them naked took all their clothes and duct taped them in this big clothing ball, put them and then threw it into the public bathroom with them. And it would take them hours to like get the ball untangled. And that is genuinely hilarious. Every so often it's cruel and it's,

it doesn't hurt, but you're in there with the rest of your bros. And so it's like, you're laughing about it. You're having a good time. You're not isolated hurt but you're in there with the rest of your bros and so it's like you're laughing about it you're having a good time you're not isolated like you're all just fucking naked looking for your pants and your shirt no one gets concussion i can't name it but there have been some in the nfl there's a lot of hazing and some of it's financial hazing right like ah yeah you have to buy all this dinner and the dinner's like fourteen thousand dollars and you know it seems like these guys are making a lot, but some of them aren't.

They're making like $300,000 that year. Cut that in half after taxes, and then $15,000 dinner is like 10% of their annual income. There's no fucking joke. So I like it when the rookies come in, and they try to haze them, and they're just like, No, no, listen. I'm 22. I'm already the best wide receiver on this team. I'm immune to hazing and fuck you all.

And the other players are like, yeah, he's right. If you're really good, you don't get nicked. When you're fucking that alpha, then at 22 you're telling the 30-year-old veterans to suck your dick. I tip my hat to them. And they have to because that's the nhl way this is nfl but i guarantee that they were in 2005 or whatever they weren't like all

right sydney all right sydney crosby run through the gamut of the spankings like it's like no i'm i'm better than all of you by a huge margin. I'm not doing this. He was the one swinging the belt. He's like, he is terminally boring. Yeah, so was Jared Fogle. He didn't rape them. He had sex with them.

Did he do that or was he child porn? It was both. He was a chomo. A triple threat. Yeah. I'll rape them. I'll kidnap them. I'll look at their porn. I'm so glad I found that article. That's fucking... That's hilarious.

You had me laughing so hard with this. It just kept me mounting. Like, they called it the Rookie Rocket. Yeah. What did they call it the rookie rocket the concussions and that we keep glossing there's so many horrific things in there that it's easy to gloss over the forest bestiality yes yeah that got one sentence in the article that shouldn't get one sentence that's its own article. That's its own article.

I really want to know more about the animal. I want to know so much more about the animal. Oh, what's the name of the team? What's the name of the team? We might be able to figure this out. The team they played on were the Chicago Dog Fuckers. The Sarnia Sting.

So maybe they had to let bees sting them. Then there's the Mississauga Ice Dogs. I'm impressed you pronounced Mississauga. I'm not convinced he did. I looked at it and I was worried. M-I-S-S-I-S. I don't know.

M-I-S-S-I-S-S-S. M-I-S-S-I-S-S-U-G-A. Jesus Christ. Dogs are getting their dicks stung by bees i don't think that counts as sex that's some i mean that's sexual to some people but i i think there was some but did they fuck an animal or did an animal they definitely fucked in it what did they do i don't know i want to know the hockeyockeyNews.com. I was about to be like, surely they didn't get fucked. But then it's like, maybe. Maybe they got fucked by an animal.

I don't know. The animal part. You've bobbed for apples and piss and cum. You have no self-esteem. No. I'm reading the animal part. And they don't mention that. It's very hard to track down.

It just says, hey, these are things that happened in the Canadian hockey league, the Western hockey league, the Ontario league, the Quebec week. And then these are like a broad list of things that it's like, man, that's fucking 400 teams. Exactly.

Yeah. It's like, these are three very large leagues of juniors and what it's not like it was all on the same team. Yeah. If I could just look down like minnesota ice dogs and the allegations and maybe i'd learn more but the way they phrased it it's hard to track it if you just google hockey hazing animal sex there are far too many results

hazing animal sex oh that's a lot of porn sorority hazing dog porn video this should be you know it really serves me right for using technically tell her that is illegal well i'm not clicking it i'm not clicking on that oh you can watch it you just can't produce it or i shouldn't display just how much about this I know. You already have. The fact that you had more info on top of that little sentence, it's troubling. You know, Charlie knows bird law. I know animal fuck law.

Oh. I got excited. I cut off the topic. Are we wrapped up on the hockey? did you guys see the Trump West Point thing in the news on that I did not you missed that I haven't been that super plugged in

so Trump did a speech for the graduates of West Point this year it's the army university college thing and two things happened one he was unable to drink a glass of water without using two hands. Like he started one-handed, then he had to finish and use his second hand to tip the cup up. This got past you, huh? No, no.

I've seen him do that before. Why the fuck does he drink water like that? This one was a little – so I've seen him do a weird lip-pursing thing where he's like... Before he gets to it. But yeah, I'm sure I can find it. And then the other thing was he had a real hard time walking down a slight incline. That's a pretty good incline.

It was not a pretty good incline. Yeah, it was pretty serious. Oh, I did see that. You could have skied down that thing. He said it was slippery. It was not slippery. I know it was pretty serious. Oh, I did see that. You could have skied down that thing. He said it was slippery. It was not slippery. I know that for a fact. I did know that he... How do you know it wasn't slippery? I'm curious. A friend of the family

graduated from West Point and he and the boys were... You got a man on the inside? I do. He and the boys were fucking around on that slope, on that exact thing. There's grip tape on it and he and the boys were fucking around on that slope, on that exact thing. There's grip tape on it, and he and the boys were playing with it the night before. And it wasn't rainy. It was bright and sunny. If I'm fat as shit and I'm 73 years old, I'm treating every – 74 years old even makes my point better.

I'm careful on every decline. Yes, yes. It's just – If I fall, all that weight, all that growth. That's it. Boom, done. I guess it's kind of fair play, right? Because Trump questions everybody else's health nonstop. And hopefully that link works.

Yeah, it does. So they're kind of pushing it back at him. You know, it was worse in my memory. You see, he starts to take a drink, he kind of struggles, and then he tips it with his other hand. You know, it was worse in my memory. You see, he starts to take a drink, he kind of struggles, and then he tips it with his other hand. You know what I think it is? I think that he's got so much spray tan makeup on that if he were to dribble on his chin, it might

run and look crazy. He's just being careful by using... I don't know. It looked to me like he's having trouble with the tip. So, the internet's going wild with it. Some guys are calling it like a neurological disorder, right? But it could be, in fairness, just a really sore shoulder from golfing or something, right? Like it doesn't have to be a decrepit.

I see shoulder injuries through a different lens, like a shoulder or a knee or whatever. That to me is almost an athletic issue. People who play video games don't have shoulder injuries people who go golfing do so like there could be a lot of reasons he struggles to drink a glass of water it doesn't have to be frontal temporal i mean his decision making is so sound that how dare we question these little things touche why do you drink because i don't get like the strength thing doesn do you drink it? Because I don't get it. The strength thing doesn't make sense to me because he did get it up to here.

I think it's a stability thing. I think it's a stability thing. I think maybe he's a little shaky. Old people get those shaky hands, especially when they're on amphetamines. Old people do get those shaky hands. I've never seen in Trump before. This is a guy who gets a lot of camera time you'd think we'd do we'd observe it other times we've seen this before yeah he's gotten shit before for drinking with two hands

i've seen him do the two-handed drink before not the shaky hands so that's what i was pointing no i've never seen shaky hands not not i don't know if i could tell anywhere i don't know i guess maybe shaky hands as a non-trump fan i like to see him get shit for health problems even if they're imaginary every once in a while they helped hillary down the icy stairs and they're like look at this decrepit woman she can't be president now trump is getting help down a gentle slope with grip tape on it that's not slippery. Or he passed out into an open van and had to be treated. In the heat. It was very hot, Taylor. It was a very normal day.

She was the only one that passed out that day. You know, you don't know that for sure. I'll just say this. We all have older family members. When's the last time they passed out and had to be drug off into a minivan? I'll tell you this. My grandpa's older than Trump, and he never has to drink a drink with two hands. And he would beat the shit out of Trump.

No, no. I believe everything you say. And his foreign policy is second to... Yeah, and he's never made a mistake in relations with China. That's true. That's true. Not one. Not a mistake in his relations with China. That's true. That's true. Not one. Not one in all his Chinese dealings. I'm going to have to talk to my grandpa about running from office.

He's a man of the people. Papa, I need to talk to you about something. I know you think that being the youngest candidate in this race will be a problem, but no. Other presidents have been younger than you, Papa. Yeah. Just go up there and say whatever you want you're gonna be way more likable than everyone on the stage i'm gonna be like man by trump these guys kind of suck this motherfucker james from southern this guy's making sense i also had a coon problem and then I put out poison and now my trash is fine. You know what? I want to know how he trains

his blue tick hounds. Well, I'm going to go into extreme detail about that. What's your economic policy? Well, just try and get everybody a job. Back to the blue tick. Does he have blue tick hounds? He did at one point have a blue tick hound. He's had many, tick hounds that they're for at one point have have a blue tick hound and he

he's had many many hounds over the years that he's what does he do with them hunts what does he hunt with them fucking everything whatever season it is he go coon hunting yeah yeah he goes coon hunting you ever do that i never actually went with him to go coon hunting it's pretty sad? Why? Well, they chase the raccoons that are rather intelligent through the woods until they climb into a tree for safety because that's what they do. And the dogs, their job is to tree them. And so the dogs all circle the bottom of the tree and like growl up at the raccoon to terrify it.

And then the hunter comes along with a flashlight and a pistol. And your goal isn't to kill the raccoon to terrify it and then the the hunter comes along with a flashlight and a pistol and your goal isn't to kill the raccoon it's to wound it severely enough that it falls from the tree that way the dogs can fight it oh just that's sad just and my grandpa didn't have running water until his 20s and so he doesn't really give a shit about excuses I've told you the stuff he does he like he went out with my youngest brother when he was like 6 and saw a squirrel on it he was teaching

my younger brother to shoot it's a little 22 he took all of us and did this and he was like see that right up there yep yep shoulder it you got it just like we practice get it right there and he's like helping him to aim at a squirrel his little 22 learning to shoot my youngest brother shoots it and just good shot apparently twitches and falls dead and then my grandpa's just there you go there you go that's! That's the first one of many! That's the first one of many! Given those

way too hard farmer back of the backpats. His hands are just giant and thick and strong. His hands the size of my head just slapping way too hard. Congratulations. The size of what? My grandpa's a big man. And my youngest brother

just apparently broke down weeping. How much he struggled over the the death of that poor little chipmunk or squirrel squirrel not a chipmunk and you know that's what you need you need a grandpa that's good i've said this before he fucked with me when i was three because he's real good with his hands and he made a real nice looking duck out of play-doh and he did that because i was spending all day that day i was like maybe three years old trying to make something that looked like a bird that i saw at one of the ponds

out of play-doh and it sucked because i was three and then he like took time to make a real nice one and he goes there you go taylor there's duck for you and i was just like looking at it studying it like wow cool man someday i'm gonna be able to do this and then he brings his giant southern missouri farmer fist down as i'm like two inches from it looking at he just goes quack and i just it scared me so much i just i apparently was inconsolable for like half an hour over that i'm three and he was busting a gut just laughing so hard over it my grandpa's a troll he's a very funny man and all he wants now he doesn't he doesn't give a shit about politics he doesn't give a shit about what's going on in the world he just wants to watch professional

bull riding in peace he's not a nascar man he's a professional bull riding man where every time i'll go into that room where he's sitting there after dinner just digesting I'll be like hey who's this he's like fucking trash how does he feel about the Brazilians in the bull riding is he cool with it does he root for him against him doesn't care do you like he he likes whoever's doing really well he doesn't give a shit about the the race thing whoever's he'll even say it's interesting he brought that up he's like yeah these Brazilians, they're real fucking good, real fucking good. This Feller Jose, he come in,

he rode the Titan, shit, 11 seconds. You know what the second fastest, second most time? Some fucking ride it for eight and a half, barely made the cut. He rides it for 11. And it's like, he just loves bull riding. Immense.

Yeah, when I brought it up, it was a national thing to me like it like is a there's the texas good old boys and there's sort of a culture there and then these brazilians come in and they're tough as nails like really just fearless bull riders i guess they're all fearless but he just wants he likes whoever can ride the toughest bull the longest and that's who is i guess i always thought it was like nascar where you kind of care who went who wins the races but you're really there to see somebody get stomped the fuck out i mean that's entertaining too because unlike nascar one out of three from my limited bull riding experience just sitting next to him after like dinners and such watching it these guys get fucked up constantly it's like every single time they're about to pull

that lever and let the bull go crazy it's it's like a 70 30 chance with a 30 being that he gets absolutely fucked up and the bulletproof vests now like i'm sure they still get fucked up but i look at it and i'm like oh that's that's like a serious bullet it looks like a chill cowboy leather vest like you might see in a movie but you look at a little more closely go ahead it seems like you might know that only protects them from the goring that that protects them from full-on penetration yes but they're getting crushed but it must still distribute even the crushing a little bit like if it's a hoof but a hoof it's gonna take what was like one inch of pressure and turn it into three or four so like it helps a

touch right it'll keep them it doesn't make it lighter no it's all about keeping they keep preventing a serious goring i think you. You know, just a penetration. They're getting crushed. They're breaking ribs and crushed sternums. Let's do it this way. Let's say I'm wearing a bulletproof vest and you punch me hard with your knuckle. With and without the vest, I feel like the vest helps a touch, right? It seems true for a winter coat, though.

Yeah, it does help marginally. A bulletproof vest like like is isn't anything special like like it's just it's just kind of tough like it's not like thick it's it's it's thin it's just a lot of like i don't know it's it's it's a soft fabric it's uh it's not the the injury might be the most has nothing to do with the goring it's either getting trampled on like arms and legs and stuff or it's you know they have to grab with one goring. It's either getting trampled on arms and legs and stuff, or they have to grab with one arm and yee-haw with the other as they're doing it because you can only hold with one arm.

And what happens is as the bull bucks, their head comes down way too fast, and the top of the bull head smashes into their forehead, and that's what seems to be the big cause of injuries. It's like they won't be able to stay steady enough and then that bull bucks too hard and then the hard skull of that bull is crashing into your forehead and it's like yeah you're gonna get concussed you're gonna get yeah this has a ton of foam in it yeah this is very different than bulletproof this is cool this

is exactly what they fucking need you know no they need helmets no only a pussy wear a helmet fighting one in seven guys it seems like is getting their skull cracked on the back of those they need helmets. No. Only a pussy would wear a helmet. One in seven guys it seems like is getting their skull cracked on the back of those bull skulls. Some of them are a little thinner

than others. It looks stylish. Can I get this in black? Yes I can. Yeah. You can't get it in black. I will take a large. So yeah

this helps a lot. But it's only on your chest. I don't see any nut protection on this thing. No, there was that one. Who was the rider who got his testicle crushed? I don't know. It was a famous one. I don't know.

That sounds pretty fucking terrible. There's so many famous bull riders to choose from. It's hard to say. There's Cletus McGillicuddy. There's fucking Tyson. You mentioned Jose already. Jose. Alan.

John. John. Steve. Worst bull riding wrecks of 2010 PBR. I wish we could watch this. Probably can't. What if I found a live leak video? Could we watch that maybe? Bull riding wrecks of 2010 PVR. I wish we could watch this. Probably can't. What if I found a live leak video? Could we watch that maybe?

Or is that also no good? It seems like the sort of thing that's copyrighted. Yeah, YouTube gets tougher on that all the time. Oh my god, these people are dying. Alright, I'm going to stop. Sorry. Dying is rough. Yeah, man. I like the weirdo sports on ESPN and stuff.

Like when they do – Strongman, kind of weirdo sport, but I guess I was headed more to like the lumberjack competitions and the knife ones where they take a knife and just cut a bunch of ropes and logs and shit like that. Yeah. Yeah, I like that shit too. That would be – I used to do paintball on there. I. Yeah, I like that shit too. That's not like me. I used to do paintball on there.

I always liked it when they did paintball. I bet. I can see why you would, but I find paintball to be super repetitive. You know, the guys just sort of set up in the same position, shoot ropes of paint accurately. I get it.

But I guess it's hard to do videography really well. Like it doesn't lend itself to it. And I'm not seeing like, did that guy get hit? Did it bounce off him? Did it not explode? Like weird. Yeah.

I don't think that competitive paintball or, or spectator paintball works well with semi-automatic guns. Like the really good guns. I think it would work so much better with like pump guns. Bolt action. Lever action. Something that really slowed them down, you know, the rate of fire. Because when they're just shooting those full automatic ropes of paint,

it's just, I don't know, it's not. I like the way you're thinking. It'd be fun to give them double-barreled paint shotguns and watch the strategy in that, you know? Like you've got to way you're thinking. It'd be fun to give them double-barreled paint shotguns and watch the strategy in that. You know, like you've got to... Real guns. I specifically said paint. But there was a guy, you probably know his name.

In League of Legends, he used a double-barreled paint shotgun. It was like a sawed-off shotgun. Only held two rounds. And this guy was so much better than somebody like me that he could pub stomp with two rounds with two barrels. Yeah, there are a few people who would do stuff like that. The tactics that they – the way that they played the game so much differently than we did because they would have – there's the guy who used the bow and arrow. I don't remember him, but okay.

It's a really cool setup. So you've got like – you've got a bow and it has an arrow attached to the string, but it's attached, attached on the back of the arrow. So imagine an arrow that will not come off the string that it's being held on. And it goes into a tube. And at the end of the arrow, instead of a broadhead or a pointy thing, it's a cup. And when he draws back,

it allows a paintball to be fed down in front of it. And so when he releases, the arrow is pushing a cup, which is catching the paintball and launching it out of a barrel. So every time he draws back, he loads another paintball. And every time he releases, he loads another paintball and every time he releases he fires and no more accurate than a paintball gun probably so probably takes more

talent to be accurate with it yeah that was a really good description because i pictured it differently i i thought what he was going to shoot was an arrow with kind of a painty beanbag on the front yeah yeah but no that's pretty cool yeah yeah and i was worried about that too like man i think i'd rather be hit with a paintball than that three and a half pound thing i described hawkeye over there killed billy what do you mean where's billy at now he's dead when did i i was picturing a full-size arrow with a little ball on the end like a beanbag right that right? That's all wet. Oh, that penetrated me. Oh!

I have oil-based paint in my bloodstream! It stings! It burns! Oh, it burns! Yeah. Those guys were always interesting, but at the same time

I was just like, I just want a was just like I just want a real gun. If it's a spectator sport I like the lumberjack challenge specifically when they do that thing where they climb up the pole really fast. There's a lot of good ones. I like it when they take an 800cc motorcycle engine, put it on a chainsaw

and cut through the big log three times. That's cool as shit that i want to see somebody i saw a guy this is a little bit of a change of topic but i saw this guy clearing out protesters over the weekend with a goddamn chainsaw did you see that video i feel like i saw that from a few weeks ago is there a reason a spanish guy mexican guy he's he gets out of his truck and he's got like work boots on and like work jeans and he's just walking down the sidewalk revving up this

chainsaw telling everybody get the fuck out of here and then yelling about how the media lies to them in like broken spanglish that sounds awesome pretty cool guy and uh i like the dog show honestly i like the dog show and i like the dog challenge i prefer the dog challenge but i like to see the pretty dogs all the agility ones maybe agility where they do the big long jump thing and then they do the the full course i like all that stuff too i like when somebody brings a dog that isn't good at that like on purpose they show up with like their their fucking american bulldog and he's just like, the fuck are we doing here, Pulse? Did you notice everybody else is a terrier?

All right, here we go. And it just makes a mockery of the whole thing. I like that too, yeah. Oh, on a related note, the NFL Combine. I don't know if you're familiar with this, but people are going to be upset. I don't know more. But there's an announcer, right?

He's on the crew that talks about the Combine all the time. He's old. He's fat. He's not an athlete, right? Not at all. And he runs the 40, right, which is a competition they're all ranked in. And then they take his 40 time and through the magic of, like, video production,

put it up against this year's prospects. And it's pretty cool to see, like, a pro versus Joe. Like, that guy represents me. A very weird Joe, it sounds like. Yeah, yeah. He's not the worst worst, but he's not good. He's not even remotely good. It's fun to see how a regular

dude on the couch would do against these people. Poorly. Poorly is the answer. I'm glad sports are sucking right now and they're all losing money. They don't deserve it. It's back. Something else to watch.

Nah, go watch some UFC, buddy. They're fighting right now. Are they? It's a Thursday? I think so. Okay. I thought I saw the 18th there was going to be a card. What's the card? I don't know. I know a handful of fighters are trying to get more money

and I don't know how to feel about that, right? You want everyone to be rich. How can you argue against a fighter wanting more money? But then it's like, Jorge Masvidal, who the fuck have you beat? You beat Funky Ben Askren quickly, I'll give you that. Then Nate Diaz, who fights every couple of years, and who's he beating? Who the hell else is Horny?

He beat Darren Till, I think. That's a good win. But the guy's wanting champion money. He won the BMF belt, which was this made-up, badass motherfucker belt against him and Nate Diaz. It's like, dude, you think you're the best? Fight someone good. I dare you. Fight Colby Fight someone good. I dare you.

Fight Colby Covington. Fight Usman. Fight, who's another top guy? They offered him Usman and he said no. Pussy, right? Pussy, he would kick my ass. Nobody wants to fight the fucking Nigerian nightmare. They call him the Nigerian nightmare.

I think if he was forced to jump around on one foot and use one hand or hey masvidal still beats me so let's go easy on the pussy thing but yeah because i will ruin your financial future yeah but so goddamn scary nigerian if he didn't talk so much shit if he was like look i'm kind of a gatekeeper guy I don't you know I don't want to fight Colby Covington because it seems like it would really hurt then that would be a different thing but instead he says no I'm the baddest guy on the planet but I don't want to fight other people who are actually the baddest men in the planet my thing about the whole fighter pay thing is you get paid your worth and but you've got to honor your contract.

You can't sign an eight fight contract and then things go well for you for three fights and you get some clout and then say, oh, let's renegotiate this because the UFC won't do the opposite. If you lose three and nobody gives a fuck and nobody's buying your jersey,

can they cut you if you've got the contract but don't they have to pay i guess it would depend on the terms of the contract right they're one-sided yeah they can cut you at any time i think they can only cut you after a loss but um they do do that sometimes there's a guy fussed recently he went three at oh and then he got his first loss and they kicked him out of the u. Even if you've got more fights on your contract. True. Yeah.

Interesting. I'm confident about that. So, yeah, if you lose a fight, they can cut you, period. But I don't know. I side with the UFC on the whole thing. Yeah. I worry that I'm being a jerk or against the fighters. But it's like, yeah, you've got a contract. I just want them to fight. I'm being a jerk or against the fighters, but it's like, yeah, you've got

a contract. I just want him to fight. I'm a fan. Every time they say, oh, I'll absolutely fight that guy. I'll fight Kamaru Usman for $30 million. That's my way of not fighting Kamaru Usman. Me too. You lay those demands

out, and that's how you dodge that fight. How much would you legitimately fight him for? Usman? I would want to meet him first, right? Me too. Usman, you realize that I'm a sweet guy, and I have a wife and kids. I have a special needs kid that I'll need to take care of for some time. You burned that string.

Yeah. Dude, in a fight with Usman, I break out every card I have in the deck. And if he's like, yeah, you do seem like a nice guy, I'd probably win by, like, rear naked choke. I'll fight you for 50 grand. 25 grand, maybe. Excuse me, Mr. Nightmare. Just so you know, when we go out there on the stage,

I'm going to say some things. I need you to know right now that I don't mean any of them. All right. But you know, we got to sell some tickets, right? We got to let the people, they got to want to see you hurt me,

but I don't want to see that. And neither does my family. It would be hilarious. If in one of these pre-fight conferences, a guy played off, like he was really scared and referred to him as Mr. Nightmare. Like Mr. Nightmare. I don't want you getting upset with me, quite frankly.

I would love to see that. That would be fun. I don't want this, but Dana says if I turn this down, that's it for me. I'm just going to give it my all, sir. Sir is perfect. Mr. Nightman, sir. That would be my approach. Mr. Nightman, sir.

The hardest thing about this fight is when you hit me. And the second hardest part has been making weight. It's been a real struggle for 170. Jesus, I haven't weighed that since high school. You see that as your way out. He's like, we'll do a catch weight. Don't worry. 185 works. You know, that's almost as big a problem. Can we do like

197? I think I can make that. Yeah, I'll bulk up. Sure god oh did you i saw jocko talking with joe rogan did you see this by chance i haven't seen it yet i it's been on my like to-do list so i i forget the third party's name but he's an athletic non-fighter type guy. And if people don't know, Jocko Wilkerson, does that sound right? It sounds right. Something very close to that.

I mean, probably people just know Jocko like Madonna. Yeah, that's me. So this guy is big, he's strong, he's a Navy SEAL, he's a trained killer, and he's also a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu black belt, right? And he's having this cool weekend where I forget the three things they did, but they're like, they did something that he's never done, like maybe surfing or something like that. They did something the other guy had never

done. There were three guys, each had their specialty. They had this super cool weekend. Well, this guy that he was rolling with is not a fighter, right? And he goes against Jocko. And I think Jocko doesn't realize how non-Jockos are fragile. I'm watching him describe what he did to this man. And he's going like this, but he doesn't look like me. His deltoids are like bowling balls. His neck is thick like a tree. and he's got traps that stick up and he's like yeah so i put him in this ezekiel choke

and i'm like holy shit this guy's like made out of wood and strong like a pro and uh anyway so he's on top of him in full mount putting on an Ezekiel choke, which is like you kind of take your arms. Anyway, he breaks the guy's neck. Oh, no. He breaks a bone in the man's neck. And Jocko's describing it, and he's kind of laughing about it, but he also feels a little guilty about it. He's like, but, you know, that guy struggled.

And Joe Rogan is like like you broke his neck you broke a bone in his neck it's your obligation to be a little more careful and joe's trying to like i see him both not tearing him down on the jre this giant platform and also being like you know what happens with regular people is they roll with the brazilian jiu-jitsu black belt and think that that person is going to keep this all under control. And Jocko's like, well, you realize he was trying really hard. So yeah, I did.

And it's like, no, no, no, no, no. That's not what they think. They think that they can sort of spaz out because you've seen this every day for decades now that you've got it all under control, that they're safe with you. But you're not safe with jocko dude jocko doesn't under like if i was rolling with something delicate like a

parakeet then i would understand that this thing requires a delicate touch i don't know how i roll with a parakeet exactly but this guy doesn't realize we're parakeets compared to him yeah yeah that's not cool so the guy uh like his um he's coughing he's having struggles you know and he's just not it's like something stuck in his throat and he thought he had throat cancer and he's like weeks are going by months are going by he's like man i think i got i think i have cancer it's it's hard to swallow and and like and he goes to the doctor he takes an x-ray and he's like you have an untreated broken bone in your neck and it's calcifying in a weird way oh wow he's like did something happen and he's like i know when i know what Jocko broke a bone in my neck, and he never got it treated.

Bones heal. People don't know. I learned a bit about this because I broke a bone a few years ago. If you never get it treated, like pretending we're not in modern medicine, they find a way kind of to bridge again. And sometimes these bones are trying to do it, like misaligned. There's like a Z, but it heals. They find a way, and then you've got a Z shin.

That's the new you. And that's kind of how I imagine his neck went. He just has... So they did some sort of surgery and scraped away the extra calcification, and he still has trouble. And he fucks with them a little bit. When he's in Jocko's presence, he's like... That's fucked up. and he still has trouble. And he fucks with him a little bit. When he's in Jocko's presence, he's like...

That's fucked up. Yeah. I don't think Jocko seems to understand his level of responsibility to be gentle. Right? Like, we're putty in your hands, Jocko. Be kind. Yeah. But you were spazzing, Woody.

Yeah. Like, comparedocko. Be kind. But you were spazzing, Woody. Yeah, like compared to you. Listen, you know, when Colin was a little kid and he wrestles with me, I'm taking care of him. Good example. Yeah, and much better than the parakeet one. I don't know how I went there. But yeah, you know,

when you wrestle with a kid or something, then you make sure that that kid ends up okay at the end of this session you look he was going hard too right imagine say that to a parent well uh i mean he was going hard he's seven right i know and he was giving me everything he had. And I thought, if I don't give him everything I've got, he's going to think adults are just bitches. He's going to think I'm a bitch. Couldn't have it.

Just guessing. Are you talking about a child molester being too gentle with a victim? Yeah. How did you know? You can hear us in the other room. So I gave him the Stone Cold Stunner. Wait, the Stone Cold Stunner? Yeah.

Yeah. Is that what you're talking about? I don't think so. No. There's a guy named Jocko. You familiar with Jocko? Maybe he's really popular on YouTube. Jocko Willink?

Is that his name? Yeah, that's the dude. Yeah. He rolled. Jacked as shit. Yeah. And he's a Brazilian Jiu-J willing is that his name yeah that's the dude yeah he rolled yeah and he's a brazilian jiu-jitsu black belt next navy seal and he broke a guy's neck a friend of his uh they were just no he was just too rough with him while rolling and uh and he feels bad about it but he's also able to still laugh about it. I didn't get the vibe that he felt bad enough. Well, we'll skip past it, but was he paralyzed?

No, no. The bone broke in his neck, and he didn't have it. He didn't know that he broke a bone in his neck. It wasn't like the spine. It was something else. It might be that that's what they said that when jeffrey epstein hung himself and the the coroner was like yeah he's got a shattered hyoid uh i've seen a lot of hangings and that's literally never happened so people just heard

this but i think that happened is instead of getting it professionally like aligned and fixed like you would a broken bone he didn't know and it got like over calcified and now he coughs and they had a little surgery to help it but he's not 100 better so what how is how is your streaming going i haven't maybe i haven't been on when you've been streaming i haven't seen you i haven't been streaming as much uh it's because i'm really really into tarkov and it's like i'm fucking leveling up i'm on a mission to make money i'm on a mission to do this and and my stream like they want to play marbles they're asking questions like should i marry this girl we've been together for 21 months now i just inherited 37 000 from my grandmother how do i reinvest it and it's like look i love you to death but i'm really

i'm trying to hit level 30 before the end of the night so i need to get back into streaming i did do a stream ish last night i was on pastilles podcast there i think it's pestily and they never correct me but um he has a tarkov related podcast and sometimes they have debates and what i'll call normal players you know people who aren't gods are poorly represented so he reached out to me he's like what are you even playing this thing hardcore for four or five months now uh why don't you come on and represent normal people so that's what i did it's like a strictly tarkov podcast it's a mostly tarkov podcast but it can go anywhere what so that's what i did it's like a strictly tarkov podcast it's a mostly tarkov

podcast but it can go anywhere what i did nice room to have you on very cool yeah yeah i enjoyed it it went i think it went well it hits it'll be on his youtube channel before too long yeah sorry on the front of twitch oh really yeah you were like fourth fifth oh i didn't know always on the front of twitch that guy is the king of the castle right now good for fucking him i'm glad he's one of those guys like i see him on there and like because we all spoke to him and he's such a genuine friendly guy it's like hell yeah dude like i hope this rolls for you for a long time yeah like he's doing great he's a great guy this drop event is uh is great for so many people it's a really cool thing they're doing. Now they rotate the drops for the uninitiated.

What that means is... I still don't know what that means. Yeah, that's what I'm getting. If you are watching a Twitch streamer who has drops enabled, and you have your Twitch account linked to your Tarkov account, you get random items given to you for free. So you're getting paid in in-game currency essentially for what for tuning into a twitch stream and um this time around they're rotating

who has drops enabled like all right this guy gets it today and tomorrow that guy gets it the day after and the day so before what they did is like all right everybody has drops but then sort of the cream rose to the top and like three or four people really reaped the benefits, Pastilli being one of them. That was when like he came to my attention and then we got him on the show. But this time they're like giving it to different people at different times.

So like I saw Aqua FPS, who's a guy that I really like a lot. He's like a, I think you'd like him, Taylor. He's got an interesting sense of humor and he's real fun and lighthearted and he has a good time with the game. Kind of looks like you a little bit. Well, handsome. Yeah, good-looking fella. Smaller head, though.

But he had 21,000 people on his stream, and he's normally a guy with a few hundred, maybe 1,000, something like that. Jesus Christ. Yeah, so instead of everyone get not everyone but instead of like 30 people getting it or even 10 and everyone going to pastilli now yeah they take turns and also they do this by the way never stop doing this if you're a tarkov person with drops i'll put my stream on this guy so i get drops even though i'm not watching you know i'm I'm getting drops

because I'm in the other room and when their time is up they raid the next guy with drops so like I went on I was gone for the weekend doing my whole flying thing I did it last weekend super great time and uh I hardly missed any drops because the whole time it was like you know all right I'm done. Send you on to the next guy. There's my laptop in the hotel room getting transferred to the next dude. Still getting drops. Shit that you're getting in the drops or like every once in a while,

it's you get 10 cents every so often. And it's like just the amount of time you watch. It used to be good shit. And I've heard rumors of some people getting good shit, but this time around it's early in the wipe so everything's worth a little more than it will be two months from now but it's seriously like bullshit hats you can wear that aren't protective socks wires like things that i might not pick up off the ground is is a lot represent a lot of my my drops yeah it's straight up fucking trash do you ever watch

deadly slob yes i like him yeah him uh landmark is incredible yes i watch i like him too um i don't i don't know if i like him or not i don't know if i like him can i talk about him sure he was for me landmark was a bit of an acquired taste uh so people don't know if I like him as a person. Can I talk about him? Sure. For me, Landmark was a bit of an acquired taste. So if people don't know, Landmark is amazingly good, right? Maybe ex-Cal-ish, like one of those guys that just seems to win every gunfight for some reason. You're like, God, what is the subtle difference between the way he does it and I'm doing it? You watch that, right? But the player, it's not jokes the whole stream or whatever

and over time i've come to appreciate him as sort of a sincere more like maybe a hard laugh right so if something's actually funny he'll laugh along if he smiles and i've taken his you know not every second is funny to him as a more genuine version. And I like him. I like watching him. I'm in his streams all the time. You know what he did that made me mad? This is what he did that made me mad.

So I want to play with him. And he has a – there's this thing on Twitch. I'm sure Taylor knows. If you watch long enough, you build up these channel points. And it takes something like 150,000 channel points to play with him, which is a lot. That's a lot. So I got up to like 90,000 points. And I'm like, you know what?

I'm getting there. I'm getting there. Getting close. Right? You know, like it's not soon, soon, but I'm narrowing in on doing duos with Landmark. And like I said, I got to about 90,000, and he removed that benefit and i'm like what

i've been saving for this since february now somebody let landmark know what he wants to play with you tell landmark to play with wood i haven't um,000 made up points I did sometimes I feel like maybe because I'm on this podcast like I could maybe get

special treatment sometimes but I've never I'm going for you right now you tell Landmark that Woody wants to play with him I've never asked for any special treatment usually when I want Landmark's attention I put it in a donation message just like everybody else does and and uh but if there's no other way to win i might use this card i might have to you got to be careful with those twitch point rewards yes like i think i told you guys like i there was one reward twitch suggested like add more channel points

like when i got partnered one of them was like 1500 points to play an ad for everyone and i was like oh i don't know why someone would want to purchase an ad that everyone has to watch but whatever okay and i enabled that one and i tell you i got i got a minute and a half into that stream before these motherfuckers had set up so you'd have to watch like an hour and 10 minutes dude i did the same thing if you didn't and i and i had to go like people were like what the fuck i'm like i'm going to the settings i'm turning it off i'm turning it on and then it even said it's like would you like to remove this benefit you have 73 minutes of ads remaining no no i'll go ahead and no dude i have

one it's kind of expensive ish it's like 5 000 points or maybe 2500 in any case i have to hydrate and my chat will straight up bully me right one guy does a hydrate another guy does a hydrate another hydrate i can get 20 30 40 60 hydrates in a row it's like how am i supposed to even do this i like the timeout one i i leave the timeout one up because that means you can pay like a thousand Twitch points so that somebody else in chat who you don't like can't talk for like five minutes. And every once in a while, someone will piss off the chat

and they'll like pile on. Or it's like you can't talk for, I don't know how it works, but it's just like timing out the same person. It's fun. I have a ton of fun on twitch you have feed your pet no no i don't have many custom ones that i've got that's one of the ones twitch suggested for me i made mine kind of expensive like 200 000 points or something it's maybe it's one something but in any case uh yeah so they'll give your dog a treat i have to go downstairs.

I get the dog. He's usually like, you guys have seen him before, but he's a great date, so it's not a dog you see all the time. And Goofy Ender comes in with his one floppy ear and eats the treat. Everybody likes it. But as much as I enjoy that stuff, when I buckle down and I'm trying to rank up in Tarkov, that's why I haven't been streaming as much.

I like that when people, like you're saying, they'll take your side a little more. I was trying to finish the 60 days in, and I was like three minutes from the end, and I could hear Fozzy. I know it was Fozzy because he was ringing the bell so aggressively. I could hear him ringing, and I was like, oh, guys, we just got to get through the last three minutes.

Fozzy really has to go to the bathroom right now. And immediately, everybody's like, go let your fucking dog out, you pause the fucking video go let your dog his bladder's this big i was like you guys are right you guys are right i'm going to let my dog out so it's a fun like the twitch is so much more fun than youtube like the immediate chat interaction is fantastic it's fun like seeing all the jokes they make and they make funny ass jokes like i will definitely if the chat's moving really fast and i see a real good joke in there and people didn't notice it i'll snipe that shit steal it as my own that's my joke now bitch so yeah twitch

has been a blast yeah i need to get back at it i was having having a good time. And I hit level 30. I hit level 30 last night. And I feel like it really turns the corner in Tarkov. What level is Pestilli? Pestilli. I think he's in the 50s. Yeah. But the difference between 30 and 50 is much bigger than it sounds. It's probably five times more or something. He ranks up really quickly

because he's really good on the mouse and keyboard, and he's also really knowledgeable, so he finds things faster. It also depends how much you want to rank up because there's a certain point where it's just, I don't know, like a badge of honor. The number doesn't matter. Like 40 badge of honor? Like the number doesn't matter? Like 40.

Yeah, I guess so. Are you getting higher base stats? Like every time you up your base stats get better? Those are like an RPG character, so it doesn't really matter so much that you're level 50 versus level 45. You'll get better at reloading

the more reloading you do. Or you'll get better health the more times you've healed yourself. So it's like Skyrim. Exactly. Where you can just cast illusion over and over to no one and get 100 illusion. Well, they've patched that sort of thing so that you can only rank up

so many skill points per raid that you're in. So every time you chamber raid that you're in. So every time you chamber a round, you're ranking up your assault rifle skill. So you could sit there with a macro and have it just reload an SKS over and over and over and lay in a bush, but there's diminishing returns.

So once you go up like two or maybe three levels, it's like, okay, now you get one millionth of a point every time you reload instead of one tenth. So levels, it's like, okay, now you get one millionth of a point every time you reload instead of one 10th. So yeah, it's one of those things. So you can't choose it. Efficient.

Yeah. Yeah. Um, yeah, although that's pretty much right. Um, it's, I want to find a new single player game,

a really fun new single player game with a great, great story. Fallout New Vegas. I mean, but like I'm bad at games. So what? Perfect. Fallout New Vegas. Is it really that easy?

Put it on normal difficulty. Yeah. Okay. But get invested in the story and care about it. If you see it as a race from point A to point B. Let me pitch this to Kyle and ask him. Taylor's putting on a show. He's interacting with the chat.

Every time there's a cut scene, he kind of diverts his attention and doubles down on chat interaction. Won't that not work with Fallout New Vegas, or am I wrong? There aren't cut scenes, not really. I don't remember cut scenes. I mean, there may be be it's been a couple years maybe i just don't recall them there aren't gonna be cut scenes there's plenty of time to just stop though and talk if you want to and it's one of those things where like you do a lot of fetch quests but they're good fetch quests so like somebody will tell you to go to this cave somewhere across the mojave and kill all the monsters that live in it and rescue timmy and so like you know you'll get into a bunch of fights

on the way to rescue timmy and then you'll finally get to the mouth of the cave and do your thing like i played to me it's the best single player game ever i played borderlands and all the story happens in cut scenes and i felt like i missed most of the story because those that's when i could really pay attention to chat you know borderlands is one of those games where there's like six thousand bullets coming at you but they're all kind of inaccurate and you just be where the bullets aren't but that's hard to do while looking at chat so yeah it makes games a lot harder but it makes it more fun too and easier in the way that if you can try and discern between the lies and the truth, when you ask like, Hey, where do I need to go from here?

So in my opinion, like, like, uh, I think fall at new Vegas is, is the best single player game you could possibly play. Um, as far as like incredible story, you can play it for forever. Like there's so much shit to do it's a gigantic open world with many main missions to do um bioshock is fucking cool yeah i already wrote down bioshock like i'm making a list of things that i like i want to get through red dead redemption 2 because i'm genuinely having fun playing red dead yeah yeah that's a brand new triple a title you should you should stick with that for a while red dead

title you should you should stick with that for a while red dead yeah yeah it's it's fun you would like it kyle oh i'm sure it would yeah i've watched videos of it and i know of it i know what's going on but um but yeah fallout fallout's so good dude i think you need a new pc it's time to pull the trigger on that um probably not for fallout though right yeah i would need like a new graphics card right you won't no you can play it years old it's much more than four years old it's probably closer to 10 years old but it's um mods if you the mods you can mod it to make it look so cool and you so so here's the thing about pc gaming you haven't even gotten into modding is so cool like you're a big fan of things like Lord of the Rings obviously so like and Fallout

especially I guarantee there is a Fallout mod that your character looks like whichever you can make him Gimli if you wanted and you could give him Gimli's axe if you wanted and it would do what or you could be Legolas any of those things

you know you could pick I guarantee there's a Robocop mod where you have Robocop's gun and Robocop's helmet and you have his voice lines like the things that mods can do to a game like Fallout in particular are virtually endless like literally adding voice lines so

that like every time you do like a VATS kill, which is where you go slow motion mode and kill somebody, you can make it have catchphrases from any number of movies. Mods do so many incredible things. I've played New Vegas a little bit, maybe a few hours worth. Not enough to really get deep in. Is that the one where like at

one point you go to some shantytown shitty like it looks like cardboard that's all of them where i get metal so that's all of them um essentially you play uh at the very beginning of the game you get shot and buried alive essentially and then saved by this western town doctor the game takes place in the mojave desert and the central figures are the um the rnc the or which is like the new the nrc anyway it's it's the new republic of california new california republic ncr something like that and then there's like caesar's legion but but they they can't fucking read so they call him kaiser instead of caesar uh you know it's post-apocalyptic it's in the future everybody was in those vaults locked away for like a whole generation so um you know everything's all mutated and irradiated and i love those games

they're my favorite games yeah they i mean they look so in-depth and fun like i can see getting into those and to woody's point like the chat interaction like i would see it the same way as skyrim where it's like if i want to look at chat i can just kind of stop moving my character that's true just stop moving them as long as there's not a giant near ever does everybody the first time they play skyrim see that giant near uh white hold or whatever the fuck it is white run and be like i can take him you just get absolutely yeah put up your dukes and then he just comes over and covers you with that giant club yeah yeah yeah um yeah it's definitely one of those games where

like as you're like walking through the desert you're always getting into like encounters and uh like all fighting random shit. But there's plenty of times that you can just stop. What are those scary bipedal monsters? Which ones? The ones that are like, when it's coming at you, it's getting real. The ones you have to give

special attention to. Those are just humans. It's a monster. You're thinking of Deathclaws. That's what it is yeah i remember really underestimating those a few times they they they didn't even seem like they were taking damage from my shit they just kind of were walking up to me they weren't we're not especially the amount i was missing i remember there's the mission like where you have

a gatling gun, and I was walking around that town, and it's like, the Deathclaws or whatever the fuck it was. I was just like, dude, I'm the fucking Grand Poobah of lead slinging right now. Nobody can stop me. And then you see a Deathclaw 1,000 yards away, and you just are right on it. And then by the time it gets 50 yards from you, it's like, oh, the health bar hasn't moved at all.

Yeah, that's Fallout 3. That's Fallout 3? Yeah, that's the one that's got kind of a colonial kind of feel to it because it takes place in Boston. Oh, this is definitely... It's in the desert, huh? It was in some shitty desert town. I know so little about it. It was just running at me.

I know so little about it. It was just the deathclaw running at me. There's just this preloaded mission in Fallout 3 where one of the very first things you do is you face off against a bunch of gang members with a minigun, and then a deathclaw comes up, and it can be kind of hard because you're so early at the game.

That'd be fun. I genuinely just want more GTAs to come out. GTA V is the most fun game I've played possibly in my entire life. One comes out every 15 years, so you're cool. I would love a new Skyrim.

But everyone at Bethesda should be put in jail for the amount of time it has taken them to make a new Skyrim. They're doing online. No, I don't want to do online. I want the single player brand new game. I don't want to be one shithead among many. I want

to be the king shithead running around the world. Yeah, I'm with you there too. Yeah, I'm the same way. I don't want to play Elder Scrolls online. I want to play a new Fallout or a new Skyrim, a new Elder Scrolls game. I can see how GTA 5 online would be fun because it's all it seems to be like tongue in cheek. You're joking around around like pretending i was watching one guy's stream trying to get a feel

for it and he was literally his character and a bunch of other characters his character was on trial and he was having to like work with another character who was his attorney and they were having like real arguments with a guy as the judge like hearing the arguments and i was like this is this is either the dumbest thing i've ever seen or very very cool like what are you gonna do sentence him to not be able to turn his game off and restart like can you not do that yeah that game that's one of the most expensive games ever made uh it's like a quarter of a billion dollars. Grand Theft Auto? Yeah. I think you're right. You guys played Star Wars, didn't you? No, never played it.

Oh my God, dude. Taylor, can you look up the actual amount? I'm curious about it. I think it is. $250 million was the initial cost. Yeah, yeah. I remember it was super expensive and it was really profitable too.

Oh yeah. Sometimes you... $265 million. $265 million is what it costs to make? That's Oh, yeah. Sometimes you... $265 million. $265 million is what it costs to make? That's what it says. Thank you for looking it up. Yeah, it's... And it turned out to be...

I think it made over a billion. Does that sound right, too? It did look in there, yeah. It made $6 billion. Wow. Yeah. Most games keep the costs way lower. You guys start like if you're looking for just something to play you're all in tarkov right now woody and kyle you're mostly in tarkov

if you're looking for a story mode fun single player gta5 is it's brilliant and the you know how people be like oh the the dialogue in this game is so funny it's so real it's so entertaining usually that's a bullshit claim it's honest to god hilarious so much of the dialogue all bust out laughing at some of it the music is great yeah you pick some through so many different radio stations

I like that a lot and just the little mistakes that'll happen where you'll be on a mission and then you'll accidentally run a few people over and then suddenly you have to be on a high speed chase. You didn't get into the multiplayer for Grand Theft Auto? No, I haven't done any multiplayer.

I just didn't do it. Are you using a controller? Yeah, for GTA I am. And for Red Dead I am. It's like typing. After a brief break-in period, you are the grandma doing this, dude. Someone please clip Kyle and I's disappointed faces.

I'm the alpha gamer. Dude, you don't understand. I just nailed it. You are the grandma pecking away with two fingers saying, it works just fine this way. Meanwhile, everybody else is going fucking 80 words per minute with masterful control.

Oh, go head-to-head on a Guam battle. Wait, a what battle? Guam. Remember typing class where you had to get your Guam up? Yes, general words a minute or something like that. I'm telling you. I'll get on it.

I'll get on it. I'm looking forward to when Taylor gets his new gaming PC, right? 16 cores, NVIDIA 3090. It still looks a controller to it. You can't do that too. You can't do that too. You can't do that. I'll buy a brand new PC and then I'll do like a Twitter poll and be like, what do you guys want to see?

You want to see me play this new awesome game with a thousand mods? Or do you want to see me make fun of this TV show? Make fun of the show. Make fun of the show. Make fun of those fucking fat people on my 600 pound life. Make fun of the people on intervention. Make fun of the people on my, oh what was that other one thousand pound sisters uh have you have you bought more monitors yet i've only got the same two i've always had

or i've had since i got the pc yeah i have this one for you guys every time we do recording and then this one for gaming i think i'm gonna tilt my side monitors vertically have you seen the new curved monitors? They're like crazy curved. No, mine is a gentle curve. I guess it's something. This thing is intense. Like it's like a fucking you.

What's it called? Shit. I don't know. I just watched an article on it the other day. I read an article. I was going to let it go. Jesus Christ. This one's $900. Samsung CJ90, 43-inch LCD.

Tailored. That's beautiful. That's a beautiful skyline they've got on that stock photo. I mean, the way your streams go and it makes sense for you to invest in – I guess I'm a little looser with business expenses than personal expenses. You know, like it, you don't cheap out on what's bringing in the dollars.

I agree with you. I, I made the mistake last night. Someone said like, are you going to keep doing the prop shit where you're fucking around with like the, like that kind of silly stuff and I was like yeah I'll keep doing it when it's

good for a laugh if you want to donate the exact amount of money it costs to buy something on Amazon I'll just I'll write down what you want and I'll do it I had somebody donate $12 to buy the nicest kazoo on Amazon I had someone donate $30

to buy the cheapest didgeridoo dude uh seven dollars for a zela and then 95 for a propeller hat uh the one of the guys i do this acrobatic flying thing one of the guys i was with last weekend that's funny uh he likes asmr right and i was telling him about your plans to just fucking middle finger the ASMR category on Twitter. Because Taylor pulls four digits, right? Taylor will get a thousand people, sometimes into the thousand. And

with that, he can rule ASMR. So he bought a kazoo, a child's keyboard, and like a slide whistle. Oh, chalkboard is great. Anyway, I told him about this and even though he likes asmr he was in complete support of your idea to raid the category and he's like that's funny i'll watch it i'll check that out so hey i got you one viewer glad i could help i i mean

that's one of those stream ideas where like in my head late at night when i'm writing it down i'm like dude that's funny as shit. And then like the thought of actually doing it, I'm like, all right, but what do I do in like minute eight? Yeah, I had that same question. Like this is the great nugget of an idea. How is this a two and a half hour show? I don't know. But let Taylor figure it out.

Definitely not. I'll figure something out. I'll make it funny. Yeah. How much is a binaural microphone what was that i didn't even hear what you asked how much is a binaural microphone am i pronouncing it wrong by oh is that the thing where it's the two ears on the side and like chicks will be like i love you and you're not a loser and you're cool yeah uh that's what you need for asmr that would be

how expensive is that because that could be worthwhile uh i'm looking it up real quick the ears on both sides have you seen those kyle yeah this one's 400 yeah i don't know if it's that funny it really depends on if you'll use it more than once the first one i found might be the same as kyle's It was $400. Are you looking at the one that literally has ears on the side? Go to the ASMR channel. A lot of these chicks are just touching ears and whispering. It's the 3DO?

Yeah, yeah. So we're on the same one. A lot of them either have ears on the side. I saw another one that also has eyes and nose in the middle. Eyes? Yeah. It's strange. I'm Googling. another one that also has like eyes and nose in the middle. Like it's, yeah. Um, it's strange.

I'm Googling. Yeah. I'm going to check out the ASMR channel right now. What's the stupid fucking thing. I don't get it. I hate it. You're hearing people chew and breathe. I don't care. Jeez.

They, some of these are crazy expensive. They can be. Well, I don't know the difference between the $400 one and the $1,000 one. The $2,000 one. The FS Pro 2. You know what I'm realizing?

I'm going to be the only man in the ASMR category. The only man getting views. The only guy getting views. There's some chomo in there with four people watching too. I've thought about that it might be funny. It wouldn't pull that many viewers or donuts or anything,

but it would be funny to just buy one of those alarm clocks where I can set it to ocean sounds and then just start a stream and not even be here. Let it play in the ASMR. Do you sleep to anything like that? Like any white noise or anything? Let it play in the ASMR. Do you sleep to anything like that?

Like any white noise or anything? I've listened to big relaxing classical music montages before, and that helps me fall asleep sometimes. I listen to the same thing every night. I go to YouTube, and it's... Yeah, Tragula by Ramzan. Let me see exactly what it's called. It is called Epic Thunder and Rain. Rainstorm sounds for relaxing

focus or sleep. It's literally just well, that's an ad from Brightland Watches. That's a nice watch. Let's just stop. Stop. Stop. What are we doing? I'm trying to stop it. What?

That's not what... Well, then play the video. I was trying to. It just kept rolling ads out. I want to hear the epic thunder. It's really loud. Is it epic? Epic. It's still the ad.

There we are. I hate that so much. You like that? It's 10 hours long. That, to me, is so treble heavy and crunchy and yucky that I could maybe be okay with it if it came through, like, good speakers, not a phone speaker. But through a phone speaker, it is like Woody repellent. Like I,

I think maybe it's translating poorly through from the phone to the microphone. My wife plays it through her phone sometimes and it's just like, make it stop every night before I go to bed, hook that thing up, roll it back to the start and go to bed it's great that's my go-to there's a mermaid on the front of this yeah and that's relaxing mermaids are are naturally terrifying so but yeah that's the music for sleep eight hours long you got mozart debussy chopin choubert and so i looked for a binaural microphone

for you that had a head right because i think that it's a it's a good prop but the price is 8400 like it doesn't make sense uh you know it's not gonna i'm not gonna break even on that investment you're not no no no yeah and just like outside of this thing, I don't mind a thing that doesn't even make money if I feel like – like if you told me that like this video I was uploading lost money, but I was going to build the show in such a way that in the long run it's a good investment, like that's okay. But $8,400, that's just stupid. Agreed.

Yeah, like I'm never going to use that stupid caliper ever again or you know what i won't use it until i will and i'll need a very precise measurement someday and it'll be like i'm glad i bought that retarded shit someday you'll want to measure the interior of a sphere or something and and you'll be able to do it like how wide i can open my mouth no like i totally do like all right there's a hole how big a drill bit do I need to make its copy? And now you've got the tool for it. Or you'll get into hand-loading ammunition. Very useful.

It could happen. Dude, tools are great because they last longer than people. Through my entire life, my tool collection has just grown and grown and grown it gets a little better all never broken a tool i've broken a tool here and there but by and large it's it goes mostly up yeah i i think maybe i've broken a ratchet maybe before but if the tool has a battery then oh six or seven years later, it might be junk.

Even if it's not, there's going to be ones that's so much lighter, longer lasting, and more torque that it's time for the upgrade. Mm-hmm. Yep, yep. Maybe I should buy that $400 mic because this entire category seems to just be women flicking ears and shit. Yes. Isn't there a way to just do two mics or something and mix it? I don't know.

It's funnier looking at the ear mic. Yeah, right? And for $400, you know, use it even twice and it might make sense. You do what our dark friend from North Carolina always does. You buy it, you make your video, send it back.

He's from North Carolina? I don't think so. No, he's from Georgia. Wherever he's from. He's our dark friend, Kyle? That's how we describe him? Well, I didn't want to say his name because we've talked about some of his illegal activities before. But he could be our strong friend, or our

weightlifting friend, or our low-body fat friend. friend no he's our dark friend he is black he's the one like one i have a picture of him actually maybe don't well yes you combine them with the illegal activities i shouldn't show it yeah that's the thing i yeah we you know it's it's hard to keep track. We've done so many of these. We have done a few. In any case, maybe you just use it and then maybe you use it in the return. See, it would have been funny, guys.

You missed a joke, but I promise you I had one. It was in the chamber. It was in the chamber. Yeah, just return the motherfucker. It was in the chamber. It was in the fire. Yeah, just return the motherfucker. It's too bad. Hell, if that pays, get the $2,000 one, right? $8,000 one. Yeah, do it.

Do it. No, the one with the ears is kind of funny. I wonder what the other side of it is. I assume it's two mics and two feeds and OBS. You take a little setup. You then figure it out it's basically probably just two mics you know and you move from one to the other and it's not mono so it actually does something but uh um and your audio interface does it handle two mics i don't know the one that the thing your mic plugs into, are there two holes or one? He doesn't know, which is funny. I had to look too.

I was like, I don't know. Well, I have the same mic as Kyle. That's mic, though, the interface. Your mic plugs into something. No, I think I'm a one-hole boy right now. You would need to do it. Really? Maybe two. I don't know where to look. Can you give to do it. Really? What? Or maybe two.

I don't know where to look. Can you give me the model on it? Of the mixer? Sure, yes. The mixer. The mixer is... We know the model of the microphone. I can see it. It's a Shure SM7B.

But the... This is a Zenyx 302 USB mixer. Why does he sound like a woman now? Or a very effeminate man? Are you saying I got the Xenyx? Do that same voice, but push forward. Just pull a little more forward like this? Do I sound sexy now?

Do I sound like I could lure a couple of boys To come be a couple of straight boys To come suck my cock on a tiger farm? Yes you do I don't know if it's going to translate But when you get past them When you get past them It gives you a little something extra

It's almost like The farther past the microphone You get, the more like a homosexual you sound. Oh, the further past it, the more that you sound like an absolute pedophile. So what does it sound like if you actually deep throat the mic? Can I hear that? You're going to have to put on a different attachment for that.

Yeah, I'm not going to throat my mic. I don't know if I can fit this girthy boy in there. That's more of a live stream thing. Taylor Berka at Twitch.com. Taylor Berka at Twitch.com. Come join the winning team. It was a cock underneath. And I told him at 2,000 subs, I do the phrenology thing at 3 000 we're like 2200 right

now i'm gonna do full full clown makeup and clown costume and i'll do that for a stream or two i had a question taylor so obviously when you first start streaming almost all of your audience is from this show right but you're dominating twitch categories from time to time and are you finding are you getting many fans who don't know pka yet not as many as you would hope but every once in a while you'll see some stray dog coming what the fuck is happening some poor soul yeah mostly it's just a bunch of people being like and then they'll get like join the retard army a lot of rape talk in here that's what I've been

looking for so my chat's genuinely hilarious they have some good jokes some good bits they'll do and then other times though someone will get too into like copy pasta stuff which isn't as funny do you get that Woody do and then other other times though someone will get too into like cop like copy pasta stuff which which isn't as funny because it's do you get that woody where it'll be like some long paragraph that's like hey yo it's tanner from high school i run a fucking mortgage fund now

and i make millions i remember this motherfucker from high school he was a bitch then he's a bitch and like that i get stuff like that like you know hey, I've got a story of Woody. This time I met him at Walmart, and the first half of it's kind of real-ish, and by the bottom I've raped their puppy or something. Yeah. That's just part and parcel. Why would you do that? Yeah, why would you do that, Woody? I mean, you didn't see the puppy.

If you did, you'd be on Team Woody. Damn, that's a hot-ass dog. Yeah. The puppy had its tail up, which is puppy for asking for it. That's fair. I've read that. Cesar Millan said that. They're built for it. Yeah, and cats too. Cats raise

that tail all the time. They want it. Giving you the old brown eye. Fuck cats. Literally. yeah no twitch is a blast having a good time with it yeah i need to get back to streaming more i had such a good night playing last night i i met all my goals i even uh i split off from my friends and i realized like i'm one successful quest away i'll give it one try i'm up too late already but one more game and the next game hit all my expectations i upgraded i hit level

30 which like opens half a dozen things yeah people probably don't want to get in talk i'll talk too much but after i split off with my friends i did a a mission. Right now, I have so much stuff I can upgrade about my character that the process takes like 50 hours. It's happening now, Taylor. It's just churning and churning and churning. After this show, I'll kick off a few more

events and go to bed and I'll wake up in the morning. We've turned the corner. I'm about to get mega man in this game yeah i i just we definitely stream different ways we do you're working on a game and like i i'm just trying to fuck around mostly because that seems to be what my my subsection of this pka audience that likes me enough to come check out the streams is like they just want to fuck

around like they just want to joke and goof and like I just the other day like I tweeted I was like or I guess it was just yesterday it's like hey what do you guys want 60 days making fun of 60 days in or do you want Red Dead Redemption 2 and part of me was like man it'd be kind of nice to play some Red Dead I really like

Red Dead and it was like nope 60 days in that's what we want we want to watch you make fun of retards in prison i was like all right well that say a similar thing happens to me like i'm playing i'm loving tarkov right i'm addicted to this game at an unhealthy level i'm all about tarkov and my chat is like marbles can i get some get some Marbles? And it's like, oh. Now that there's no music, I feel like Marbles is even harder to pull off. It added a tone, a vibe, an excitement to it. I'm playing Thunderstruck and making a really big deal out of Marbles, which isn't that big a deal. Yeah, but you do a really good job commentating Marbles.

Thank you. You do a very good job of that. I didn't want to say it to Mark. Love Mark. Such, such a great guest. But the first time you see Mark, wait for Kyle.

So he's in. So I was saying, Kyle, Mark, our guest, great guy. Love him a lot. The first time I saw him in the show though,

he was standing there in a gray t-shirt, nipples protruding. And so for the next entire season, he was standing there in a gray t-shirt nipples protruding and so for the next entire season he was just called nips and so i didn't i didn't want to ask him about being called nips but i i do i i'm about to add an emote because i hit oh no i'm about to add an emote that's just him with the nipples on if If that gets passed or not. Now I don't want to add it because he's such a genuine guy. I don't want people to make fun of him. Maybe a close-up of the nips can be an inside joke.

Exactly. A nip close-up. Twitch will be like, yep, approved. I love Woody's reaction when I called him a pig. It was so good. It was like, ooh. It was his disapprovalval what's funny that i noticed is that i added a ton of new emotes like new funny trump faces funny faces of all of us uh my jeffrey epstein emotes

took a little longer to get approved and that was funny but now now you can epstein it up on on my channel over there i've got a couple Epstein options. I love that meme I sent you the other day on text of the guy who had bought Epstein's island, and it's just Epstein and a beard. Yes. Just Photoshopped big Arab-looking beard on there. Was that island cool?

Did he have it to himself? So here's what I picture. Super rich guy with his own island all the infrastructure you want somehow he has a power station there and plumbing and a temple there a temple and it's like i don't even know like a sandals resort for just him like it's 50 meter pool like what is the island like um it's up for sale. Let's take a look. You can buy it right now? You can buy a rape island?

They don't like it to be called that anymore. Let's see. It's a private island. It is about 78 acres, which is rather large. Little St. James

is the name of it. That's what they prefer. Spitting in our face with that name. It does look nice. The photos of his temple on there are so fucking creepy. Sexual abuse is listed on here above amenities. It should be his activities. We have water polo, we have shuffleboard and sexual abuse is listed on here above amenities. So I like it. It should be as activities. Like we have water polo,

we have shuffleboard and sexual abuse. Yeah. And we've got the entire color spectrum of all the world's races of nine year olds. Yeah. I don't want to go there. I'd love to go there. Actually,

I would, I would go, I want to go, I want to go snoop around Scooby-Doo style. See what I can find. You think you're going to find like a, you pull like a candle holder on the wall and you fall into a fuck dungeon? Ruh-roh, Raggy, it's a child being raped. I'm going to try and do, oh, I don't know, Scoob.

We need to get out of here. If I get more than two words into Scooby-Doo, if I do more than Ruh-Roh, it just kind of becomes Bubbles. Jesus fuck, Rick. I'm not going to rape these kids. I don't care what fucking island we're on. It's not legal. That shit is fucked. I don't even allow kitties on here. Can you imagine? You could rape a kid. Can't bring a kitty.

Oh, man. Bubbles. King Bubbles. I want more. I made the mistake of starting an episode of that animated trailer and I think I made it about three minutes in before I was like, this is going to make me sad. Have you seen all the movies? You've seen all the original content I've seen.

I think I've seen every movie. There might be one, the newest movie. I don't know what year that was made but i don't think i watched that one but i watched the christmas one i watched uh the subsequent one where the end of it is like jim lahey in the middle of a street after like a uh a brinks heist like one of those yeah you know those armored cars yeah he's like threatening to to kill ricky in the middle of the street. Yeah. Or Julian.

Yeah. That's a good one. Yeah. I've seen them all. It's, it's fucking great stuff, man. I, I,

you know, but it's over now. It's over now. I can't, I can't get into the animated thing. No, I understand why they're doing it. Well,

yeah, they got to make some, make some coin, but still he's dead. So like they, they have to animate him. Oh, plus they, plus they're all you know much much older jim lahey his not not the i don't remember what the actor's name was you know he's dead now but the videos on youtube of him making his own kind of

beach front not beach front but maybe canal he likes concrete or something yeah he likes and placing rocks and building like he built a theater he built all these like retaining walls and it's really impressive and the way that he explains it is so antithetical to the way that you like you're trying to watch jim lahey talk about this and he's doing it in such a calm reserved like the guy doesn't even drink in real life or he didn't even drink yeah drunk person that well and it was just like a mind fuck watching that where he's like calmly mixing cement

being like and you can't get too antsy with it or you'll mess it up you have to keep it very don't you just wish at the end of one of those videos where he's like being his true self and it's nothing like Jim Lee that it just zooms out and he puts his arm around Randy and he's like yeah we, we just love it here. We just love it here.

I saw him, I saw maybe the same video as you. And then I heard he died and I was like, how? Because masonry seems like the kind of activity that would keep someone in shape. He likes mixing concrete with his bare hands. He likes carrying boulders and shit around. I think he died of cancer, though. Did he?

That'll get you. Well, I guess masonry doesn't keep cancer away. Masonry doesn't keep anything away. I mean, body fat? It keeps away poor retaining walls. It keeps away the ocean water. It keeps the water out. Yeah.

It's an undisclosed illness, but it was short and unexpected. Maybe like a stage four pancreatic or something really rough. Who knows? Maybe he's still alive, like Epstein. He just stumbles in one day to a brand new Trailer Park 4 series. Not even bad. He faked his own death like Mark's co-worker dude person. That was one of my favorite shows for so long.

I would show that show to everybody. It's better if you're high. I don't think I could watch Sober. I don't know how anybody watches Sober. It's better if Kyle shows it to you. I don't know that I would have enjoyed Trailer Park Boys if Kyle didn't lay it out with the lore. Watch this guy's pants for the next seven years. He doesn't change them.

In season three, episode four, he rips them. That rip will stay there for the next... Kyle Newton! Yeah. Kyle is a student of the show. He's like, you know, in the very beginning, is it Randy who drinks? No.

They all drink. Julian is who I'm going for, though, I think. Julian. And he's like, Julian gets out of prison, and he comes back, and they put, like, a mixed drink in his hand. It's alcohol with ice in it. And he's like, Julian gets out of prison, he comes back, and they put like a mixed drink in his hand. It's alcohol with ice in it. And he's like,

you know, with the exception of three times in the next 10 years, he will always have a drink in his hand. And I try to like, I don't know, find exceptions to that. I guess I'm an asshole.

I was like, let's see where he gets this wrong. Nope, he's not wrong. He's right. It's funny. That show is better when Kyle introduces you to it. Most shows are. But yeah, I've shown that show to so many people,

like so many people who'd never seen it before. It's a treat when I meet a new girl or somebody who's never seen that show. And I'm like, are you with the Trailer Park Boys? He's like, well, I am from kind of rough neighborhood no no no no the tv show tv show trailer park boys no great we're gonna need a half an ounce of marijuana in about eight or nine hours let's uh let's get started that's what you want boys is i remember the first episode or two. It wasn't Kyle that turned me on to it because it was years and years.

It was before I was part of this show when I was in college. And I only watched like one episode or two episodes the first time I was introduced to it because the intro itself is so sad. It's like the shittiest, saddest existence of these kids riding around in a trailer park and everything's like broken bottles everywhere. And then the shitty camera work. It made me feel bad for a while where it's like, oh, this is just a sad life for these poor kids riding around. Whenever I'm introducing it to someone, I try to tell them that it's a documentary and keep that up as long as possible. And you can tell who's retarded that you know. Well, most people, by the end of the first episode, they're like, wait a goddamn minute here.

Because there are a lot of wild things. Shouldn't they have arrested that? But every now and then, you'll have somebody going for like two three episodes before they they're like the fuck is this when did this happen is this stuff just legal there on a related thing you mentioned documentary there came an extra episode of tiger king that i haven't watched was it good no no no no it's uh joel mckale um doing like uh skype interviews with some of the people who are on the show it's not another i thought they had re-edited some extra extra content more footage it is not that so i watched 15 20 minutes

of it and turned it off oh it was that bad like it couldn't even hold your attention i'm not a big joe mckale fan outside of like uh mckale is it joe or joel he's the guy who did from community and the one who used to do uh talk soup oh yeah i definitely know this person yeah yeah yeah i i mean i don't know i i didn't like him at this i think he was a big fan of the show and that's how he got the gig and i just didn't care for it you know he's the character he normally plays is way cooler than you you being like whoever i'm talking to right like his whole shtick is i'm like so cool but that's not really a fit in the tiger king crowd yeah you know he was just kind of being himself and i want to say the first interview was the rotten toothed guy who now has teeth

yeah and it was just it wasn't for me um it didn't do it for me i watched the whole thing but the only reason i was able to kind of stay engaged through it was because it was i watched it as soon as it came out like right on the tail of the tiger king but it genuinely is pretty fucking boring like that new episode was clearly just a grab for attention they're like oh my god this is the biggest thing on earth uh uh get everybody on a zoom call and we'll record it i wonder what tiger king would have been like if they hadn't lost the footage, right? You know, the animal abuse, the footage that Joe Exotic seemingly destroyed.

How does that change it? Joe Exotic came away as this like almost sympathetic hero of a story that had no heroes, maybe the favorite character in this wild story. If it captured him like killing lions for sport and being cruel and being racist then people might have viewed it through a whole different lens i almost thought of it like maybe i'm wrong i thought the whole like oh free joe exotic joe exotic is the best like it seems like memes almost to me where it's like yeah this this guy's clearly

all these people for the most part there are some good people in there but a lot of them are just some shit it's memes but carol baskin was way more hated than joe exotic and probably she should be she killed her husband yeah she she is a murderer yeah her husband never murdered anyone as far as he make money selling drugs and he flew his plane low over the ocean, single engine, and his plane's missing and his car was at the airport and that's how he died? No, because there's no drugs at all. But the thing is that his planes were not capable of making the flight that he went on, the trip he was going on.

He would have known that, yeah. Yeah, you know, those planes had like a 150 mile range or whatever, and he needed to go like a thousand miles, whatever it was. Carol Baskin was a shady bitch. No one will get around that. She was a shady fucking bitch.

And she was unlikable. She didn't make any funny jokes or anything. Have you seen those guys who convinced her that they were Jimmy Kimmel? And that she was going to be on The Tonight Show? Yeah, I did see that. That's hilarious. Good for them. I saw a bit today, like a hidden camera bit,

where this guy calls a computer repairman because his PC is not working. He's got like a gaming PC and the computer repairman cracks open the case and looks inside and it's full of beans. Like cooked. Actual beans. Like cooked black beans. Like when you yeah exactly and i mean like no joke like five ten pounds of cooked black beans and and the guy's like whoa dude there's this is this is you how did this happen he's like i bought bought it off Craigslist two years ago. I've never opened it up. He's like, I can't believe this computer could work like this. He's like, your motherboard's back there somewhere.

The guy goes, are those all motherboards? He's like, no, those are beans. That's food. This is food. He's like no those are beans that's food this is food he's like so do i need to that i thought that was like like is that for like cooling like to keep it cool no no the beans are not doing anything that you want to happen we've got to get the beans out beans he's like i hate to say it but I think you just need a whole new computer covered in slimy bean juice at this point

pointing at the beans he's like are those the motherboards that's food oh man that is fucking funny dude He's like, that's food. No, that's pig. Oh, man. That is fucking funny, dude. Fucking great. It's just full of beans.

I've got the video here. I mean, we can't watch it because he sees something behind the scene. If you're listening and you want to hear it, it's Vlog Creations. Do you want to hear Don Lewis and where his money came from so i guess there's used cars which is part of it carol baskin says oh another part of it is i guess he bought real estate fixed it up and sold it and then what i was referring to was he frequented Costa Rica as a business, as a vacation spot.

And he had business dealings that required him to fly back and forth in his little plane to Costa Rica. And, uh, his car was at the airport when he went missing. And some people think that it was just a plane crash in the water but but they explained in the show that his planes couldn't travel to costa rica he got got he got fed to the tigers i'm convinced i bet my bottom dollar hmm like he wasn't flying himself to costa rica

because his planes can't make it no he's tiger case i don't know maybe i could have my facts wrong yeah they explained in the show that he'd have to refuel like a handful of times to make it. Is that the case? I don't know. Maybe I could have my facts wrong. Yeah, they explained in the show that he'd have to refuel like a handful of times to make it. He just didn't do that. He didn't fly himself there. Even though so many people in that show are unlikable assholes, Carole Baskin was the most

unlikable asshole. That's why people hated on her. The thing is, besides Doc, Doc also seemed like he had a lot going he seemed like the smartest guy in the show and he had a lot like that he was hiding but carol seemed so manipulative and like such a liar like when you see her tell the same lie back in like 1994 or whatever. And then today, and she does it the exact same way. Like the way she's like,

she's like, Don said he had to get up early, early, early, early. And she like rolls her eyes and like nods her head back and forth. Like she's like mocking the way he said it early, early,

early, early in the morning. And like, it's like, she's told this lie so many times, like, like she's got her lines down basically. Like she found a lot of the words and she it's like she's told this lie so many times like like she's got her lines down basically like she found a lot of words and she's not going to deviate from it unless it gets real serious so yeah fuck her carol baskin so these are the different stories

conspiracy theorists say that um don had been flying his plane to Costa Rica every month and he became tangled up in a dark drug trade. Chatter led to claims that his so-called friends, suggesting Don liked to bury cash in the ground. Theorists concluded that Don was killed by a drug trade gone wrong. Carol Baskin says that he would fly to Costa Rica every month to have sex while she was on her period was with like other women king uh and i don't know what the truth is probably probably the sex

i think i think it was the fucking the monthly thing ties into that right like yeah he had a schedule where every 28 days he would go down to costa rica for business right i got some uh business to take care of south of the border later every month you just yeah so anyway i was repeating a conspiracy theory it turns out yeah um yeah i don't i don't know i think she killed him it's so weird that like he was seeking protection from her like a like weeks before he goes missing and it's so weird that like the will was written to stay like in the event of my disappearance yeah i remember that it's very shady there's too many up in the air aspects for it to be

totally up and up it's like she was planning for contingency issues yeah I don't know I mean she just seems like a real creepy fucking person too she's a bitch and I hate her fuck you Carol Baskin I know you're a listener of the show she's a patron

actually she's a patron we hung out with her $50 a month to hang out with us. She's a bitch there, too. Gave her the money back. Wasn't worth it. Was it last show or two shows ago? We had two women in there. Yeah.

At the same time. Probably the last one. A couple of ladies. That is hilarious. So anyway, Kyle Kyle do we have any post rule info friends.gov no

okay then PKA 496