Painkiller Already - PKA 520 w Matt Farah - Cyber Truck is a lie, Complex Watches, Patreon F Show

Episode Date: December 9, 2020

Pink Killer already, episode 520 with our guest Matt Fair of Smoking Tire Taylor This episode of PKA is brought to you by Postmates and SmartMouth A couple sponsors you guys are all familiar with We'll talk more about them later Matt, thank you so much for joining us again It's been a couple years, I think

Thank you boys for having me, it is a pleasure coming back again I was going to say hot minute and I stopped myself Are there like meme words I can't say? Because you should just tell me now. We use the meanest. I have watched your section talking about watches with Joe Rogan six times now. I don't know if I told you like the last time I was on your show that the first time I talked about watches with Joe Rogan and we started talking about Grand Seikos and stuff, I got a letter from the CEO of Grand Seiko thanking me for promoting their business in America.

The Joe Rogan bump is very real. I imagine. It's a very real bump. There's something interesting about watching a guy talk about his interests. You know, if he's truly a subject matter expert, he could talk about games, television, watches. I don't have a big interest in watches day to day, but I've watched you talk about it for hours now because it's cars and planes or guns or factories or even computers. You know, it's artistry combined with engineering. And so a lot of the things that people like about cars and motorcycles

and planes and guns and jewelry, it all applies. Plus, a lot of guys don't like to admit this, but I'm okay with it. It's cool to want a trophy and a watch is a good a good trophy we don't get to like you and i can't walk around with like big diamond earrings and be taken seriously to express a level of trophyness but but you can walk around with a 20 or 30 000 watch and it and you know people don't really look at you sideways i don't know how many people recognize that trophy like i think i would very few yeah yeah i mean i will tell you this way more people notice me in my hoop earrings than your watch we're talking about a trophy no i think

if you're talking about trophies more people would probably notice like sneakers like if you had some sick jordans that were hard to find something, more people would probably notice that than a watch, a watch. If you really want to get noticed, you got to go with the staples and you got to go. It's, it's all about brand. If you really want to get noticed by like,

not watch people, which are, you know, I don't gold Rolex. That's how you get people to watch. That's the one I would know if you had a, yeah, I don't even,

I can't even name another high-end watch. I have a watch that's called – not to brag, but it's called an Audemars Piguet. And it's shaped like an octagon. It's not round. And it's quite expensive, and there are not really a lot of them around. But it doesn't – if you don't know watches you nobody i mean i wear it all the time nobody ever says anything i mean no one ever looks at it twice but like if you are where i have owned a gold rolex before for like a month i got rid of

it i was like this is not me and people will just be like nice to to meet you. And they'll just be like Marcellus Wallace's briefcase. It's like you've got really good cleavage and you're catching them all the time. Like, come on. If you want to meet women in their 40s at Mastro's Ocean Club, you wear a gold Submariner and sit at the bar with an open collar, and you are good to go. I remember when I was like 12, I got a crappy fossil watch for my birthday from some uncle or something.

And because in my head I was like, watches? That's what grown-ups wear. I was like, I have to be really serious about this. This is a piece of shit, like 25. I remember jumping into the pool with it and getting out and be like oh my god my fossil watch you still have it i bet we're right it's far enough a time has passed that it's probably moving into ironic cool at this point about the disintegrated somewhere by now what's on your wrist right now man i am oh this is a cool one man this one is a watch called a weiss this is called a weiss american issue field watch and what makes this

watch extremely cool is that my friend cameron weiss made it he is a watchmaker he's a young guy in his 30s um and he started this company, Weiss Watch Company, in California. And he doesn't just make the watch. He designs and manufactures the movement and all of the parts in the movement. So this watch is 100% made in LA. All of the parts are made in California for this watch. And this particular one is very special because it's a paint-to-sample Bugatti French

Racing Blue dial. And it's the only one he ever made with this color. It's for me. So if you look on the back, you can just see the number 1. It just says 1. And so these are really, really cool. One of one.

I kind of complained about that. And I was like, what the fuck, bro? And he was like, never say never. You know what I'm saying? I'm like, why shut the door on yourself? Well, I hope he's prepared for the influx of customers. There may be half dozens of people contacting him.

I really, really recommend people buy. There may be half dozens of people contacting him. I really, really recommend people buy. I mean, you know, you, you can't, uh, you cannot get more, uh, patriotic than buying really, really artisan crafts designed and made, uh, in America. So you should, can you say the name again? I want to Google it. What Weiss watch company, W E I S S. And I believe it's just Weiss watch Company. W-E-I-S-S. And I believe it's just WeissWatchCompany.com.

And their watches are like $1,800 to $4,000. How long does it take him to build a watch? Like in hours? I think it's probably like 30 hours or something. So he's the guy sitting there with the light and the thing. Yeah. Yeah. And he has like one or

two assistants at this point that do some of the other assembly and he has one guy who runs the cnc machines because he's own he owns two cnc machines yo they make i mean they cnc like the smallest little cog wheels they're measured in like microns i mean it's the smallest shit you it's so cool that stuff i i i can't i love when people can like make things like make this from scratch the what machine you're talking about that makes that what is that a cnc machine yeah yeah like uh it's like um it's like a big mill, like a computer-controlled thing that mills out little parts. So you program in a code, and it sticks in a block of metal, and it goes... And out comes a part.

I'm sorry, Taylor, you know what a drill press is? Right where the bit comes down? This is like a motorized bit that can travel around. So you can... You know, your Apple laptop. It's like a reverse 3D printer. Yeah, that's pretty good, actually. Actually, yes, it's a 3D subtractor. Exactly what it is.

It's sort of omnidirectional, so it can come at a piece of stock. And it has multiple different bits. So it can take out different bits and change and do it does a sanding thing and then another bit and it's a it's a it's fair they're fucking badass it used to be like a million dollars but there's still a million dollars well they're all over the it's become like like woodworkers buy them now and it's not an abnormal tool for a hobbyist woodworker to have and those would cost like five or seven grand so it's not an abnormal tool for a hobbyist woodworker to have. And those would cost like five or seven grand. So it's a big investment, but it's possible.

It depends on what they do, right? So like one that's like the size of a bar fridge, you know, that could work on objects, you know, the size of a softball, right? Something like that is what you're talking about, like 10 grand, right? like 10 grand right if you want to do if you want one that is big enough to do metal and that can make let's call it uh wheels like forged wheels for cars like hre wheels in in vista california makes probably the best aftermarket wheels in the world they're very very well made very well engineered and very expensive and they have these giant things and they literally put in like an enormous cylinder of forged aluminum and it cuts them out and it takes you know six hours or whatever to cut them out it's really crazy so one of those or one like cameron weiss has which can make the tiny little

parts those are the really still the really expensive ones in woodworking i imagine the tolerances aren't quite as tight as anything like watchmaking yeah you can get one that does four by four sheets you know and yeah and it it's efficient so if your cuts have to go all the way across the sheet there are only so many clever ways you can maximize you're going to have more scrap on the other hand if you're coming in from the top and every cut is exactly where you want it to be and your scrap looks like, you know, you buy a paper of stickers and there's all the weird, they really maximize how much, when your scrap doesn't have to be straight lines that go all the way across the wood, it's much more efficient. It doesn't matter for a hobbyist, but it's cool. So in terms of the craft of old school watchmaking, traditional watchmaking,

a CNC machine is pretty much the most advanced piece of equipment you could have and still be called traditional watchmaking, right? There's this new dude who I interviewed and he was out of his fucking mind. And his company is called Barrel Hand Watches. And he's got a new company and he's using additive manufacturing, better known as 3D printing. So his watch is insane. And it's made using parts that because they're 3D printed, you know, they couldn't exist. You couldn't physically mill that with a CNC machine the way that you can 3D print or manufacture in an additive way. And so for this guy, this guy's first watch he's ever made is like $30,000. the way that you can 3d print or, or, or manufacture in an additive way. And so for this guy,

this guy's first watch he's ever made is like $30,000. And it's just so crazy looking. It looks like a space communicator. And so they're doing some crazy stuff. And material science is very strong in watchmaking as well. Watches are interesting. So I'm really out of my depth here, but it's like they've solved the timekeeping problem a while back. Now it's this like Rube Goldberg machine, a more complicated way to solve it.

What odd ways? How can we solve this with a little more flair, a little more artists? Yes, it's complexity for complexity's sake. And that is where it gets starts to get really, really fun and crazy. There's people that like, there's a thing called a tourbillon, which, okay, we're gonna go into the weeds a little bit here. But, but a watch has a mainspring, which is where its energy is stored the fuel tank, right? And that mainspring slowly unwinds in a controlled way. And the unwinding is done through something called the escapement. In the watch, if you were talking about a car,

the mainspring would be an engine. The escapement would be the transmission, telling you how much power to put to the ground from an engine that's spinning at a constant speed, right? And so in wristwatches, because you're moving your wrist around all the time, it doesn't matter so much that this spring is this flat coil susceptible to gravity. But back in the day, pocket watches were always kind of in your pocket like this. So if you've got a spring that's a coil spring, it's going to sag over time.

So they developed something called a tourbillon. time so they developed something called a tourbillon a tourbillon is a cage like tommy lee's drum set that spins the thing around to evenly distribute gravitational force around this this spring right are you following am i too far in the woods here okay now they have a new one another thing called a flying tourbillon which is is like, you know them things where you, the gravitrons where you go in this and spin around? So it's one of those for the hairspring. So now it's not just spinning like this. It's spinning on four axes like this.

And there are watches that for pure complexity's sake. All to solve a problem we don't have. A problem you don't have. What time is it? Do you have 14 minutes for me to tell you how I got the time? You know, it's so funny. My good friend, Chef Carl Ruiz,

may he rest in peace, would call these types of watches lecturer's watches because you'd have to explain them to everybody. But they now have watches that have multiple flying tourbillons, which do nothing. So imagine if you were,

if this watch were a car, it would have. Okay. And this is a watch that is ultimately tells time. It has two, two fucking hands on it. So, so the,

these are these tourbillons. They're spinning like this, like just big flashy spinning titties, right? There's two, sometimes even three, maybe four of these things. Imagine your car had one engine, four transmissions, but was one-wheel drive. So imagine the power went out four ways and then came back together to one out drive. And why would you do that? four ways and then came back together to one out drive. And, and why would you do that? And you'd get the guy went,

look at the thing I did though. And you go, well, that doesn't improve the performance at all. In fact, it really just makes it more complicated. And he goes, it is more complicated.

That's why it costs 10 times as much as the one that you're wearing. And you go, well, that seems awfully needless. And he goes, exactly. There's other the watch ensures. There's other, like, useful complications.

Like, I had a watch called a perpetual calendar, which is just a crazy math machine. And that will do the time, the date, the day, the month, the year, four digits. It knows all all the leap it knows how many days are in each month it knows all when all the leap years are uh and it also had a fuel gauge so it could tell you how much power it had remaining um and that watch if you kept it running would only have to be adjusted once every 400 years thank god because whenever i set like the date on my watch and it only goes forward that makes me crazy if it kept track of 10 000 years everything how long would it take me to go you know it's so i have that same watch it also does that yeah just google calendar as well. But imagine,

imagine something that was this big, but it had 900 pieces inside of it that added it. Mathematically could calculate all that shit. It's really, really neat. I mean, that watch came with, because it's a four digit year,

right? So it said two Oh one nine when I had it right. 2019 and the year we don't go up every year, right? Blah, blah, blah. Well, it came with a replacement first two digits. So it came with a 2-2.

So in the year 2,199, you would take it to an IWC store, and they'd replace the first two digits of the year with the 2,200. Wow. Ridiculous. Needless. Totally stupid. And here's the problem. You know why I don't have it anymore?

Because if I wasn't wearing it all the time, I had to keep it on a watch winder to keep it going. If it stops, then setting all that shit correctly again is a fucking nightmare. You have to take it to a shop basically to get it set, so you have to keep it going. nightmare you have to take it to a shop basically to get it set so you have to keep it going so you have to keep it on a watch winder but that means you can't keep it in the safe with the rest of the watches so now you've got this ridiculously expensive watch just spinning around on your nightstand it's literally the first thing that any potential thief would steal yeah and put a light on it too. And,

and they know this and sort of all the mechanisms. It's like a disco ball. And so, and so, you know, it just, it was, it just was so stressful. It's only going to be fine for 200 more years.

At first I was like, I'm going to keep this thing going and it's the mission. Yeah. This'll be a fun game. And then I'm like, someone's going to steal this thing. How much does it cost? It's like 25 grand.

Oh, my God. It's expensive. There's no room in the safe for a watch winder. There's no one. Yeah, there's no room in the safe for a watch winder. Well, no, they're kind of big, and you have to get power in there, too. So most safes don't have a way to get – I don't know about most, but certainly the one I have doesn't have a hole for power.

And if you were to drill one – did you drill a hole in the back? You did? Really? Yeah. What do you have charging in the safe that you need power for? I put a video recording DVR in there. So if you've got surveillance. Oh, that's cool. That's smart. That may – I wonder if that negates the fireproofness.

Only slightly. You know, it's an eight inch drill bit. It's not. You know what? I think it's a good plan. I'm going to consider that. They'll probably be wearing a mask if they made it that far, right? I'm going to consider that, but I've already sold the watch.

I think it was a federal regulation right like you know you don't think you don't think the guy robbing your house is gonna have a mask if he makes it all the way to the safe he certainly is in 2020 he's gotta he needs a mask to go in the fucking anywhere 2020 if you don't if you're not wearing a mask while doing crimes in 2020 you have really lost the plot not only are you dumb you just didn't consider it you have, you have really lost the plot. Not only are you dumb, you're just inconsiderate. You have taken none of the advantages that life and circumstance have given you. You'll see somebody looting a

Best Buy in video and it's like, you're the only guy without a mask. Do you not look around and be like, at least a little bit of facial coverage so that the security camera... Bro, take the TV, but just don't cough on me, bro. You can't mad at a guy for breaking into your house

because he's wearing a mask. Imagine a lawsuit. Imagine a lawsuit. A guy breaks into your house and gives you COVID and you sue him. He breaks into your house, you're quarantined, and you give him COVID

and he sues you somehow. That's the worst. He can't prove it. He says that after your attempt at robbery was foiled, that you held him down and spit in his mouth saying, take COVID, you suck. The other day, dude, you know, in L.A., the masks are really helping the A-listers because they can go shopping at fucking Whole Foods now and not get bothered.

But like the B and C-listers that just live for getting recognized at the grocery store, they're fucked. They can't. Nobody's saying what's up anymore. Michael Jackson was way ahead of his time. He always had that mask. He was good. But when you're the only one, it really becomes. You're the first one through that door.

Yeah. You don't want to storm that beach. Michael Jackson managed not to have famous kids. Except his daughters. He got a hot new single out. I listen to serious. I listen to satellite radio because I drive these new test cars for my gig, and they've always got satellite radio.

And Paris Jackson has a new single called Let Down, I believe, and they're playing the shit out of it on satellite radio right now. I saw her at the Casa Del Mar Hotel, and I believe this was the night she was going to her senior prom. So I don't want to seem like too much of a creep when I say this, but that girl was so incredibly strikingly beautiful. You could see her eyes from like 50 feet away, just like the brightest blue eyes. She was really, really really stunning did michael jackson impregnate her mom after he turned white oh looking at it i don't know this makes any

michael jackson never impregnated anyone i don't i'm gonna go with that theory as well i think that's i think i am like what could be the explanation? I don't know. He has black skips a generation. He has skips a generation. Like twins. You know that Debbie Rowe woman that's her mom? She actually kind of looks

like a younger... Like you could... There's definitely familiarity. That's definitely a real mom. For sure. Yeah, I don't think Michael Jackson is capable of having children. And very white.

Did she have a nose job her nose just like michael jackson's new nose well which one he's had a lot yeah special special i feel like his last nose is the nose that she inherited somehow like i i'm going i thought about the skin she's an hollywood bro you know that shit might not be she might not be natural they give them shits out for sweet 16 presents around here you know where i was from they did too i i'm like you know i'm jewish and i went to a very jewy private school and so the nose job was a very popular sweet 16 can you be younger it seems like 16 is a pretty good age if you want to get it like you wouldn't get it done at 12 when you're still changing right well 12 would be very creepy 16 14 year

old if you don't get that schnoz fixed well what if you go because the nose isn't done growing you gotta wait at 16 i'm saying nip it in the bud full-size schnoz as a girl don't you think it probably would be done? Girls are kind of done growing at 16. Yeah, you're probably right. You could probably start shaving off bone and adding more. Whatever needs to be done. Look, Taylor.

Remove ribs. We need some hot 17-year-olds here, right? I was going to get pretty creepy. This conversation has gone off the rails. Someone fucking hit the brakes. I'm thinking about buying a car next year and i wanted uh yeah cars i like uh so so i i like the cyber truck i'm thinking about getting a cyber truck i that's what i wanted to see i wanted to see your reaction whether it was that or it was oh yeah and and i think i got my answer already so yeah you need that cyber so if it's not the cyber truck here my other like thoughts like like yeah probably uh a high-end

camaro or mustang like okay okay look my recommendation is to start with a vehicle that is based in reality earth okay i would not start with a fantasy movie prop that is not actually a real vehicle that can be built um so while i have i have no problem with the the cars uh that tesla builds and sells and that you can show up and buy and drive. I've driven them all. I think they all are fun in their own way. I think they make EVs cool and they look good and they do most of, well, most of what they're advertised with the exception of full self-driving, which of course is nowhere near that.

But I don't believe that the cyber truck can be built as as it looks in the in the concept phase um certainly not if it is going to be sold in europe and if he it really thinks he's going to build a new vehicle from scratch and not sell it globally he's an idiot you know they shrunk it a little bit. Did you hear that? Look, I think he operates that company by, here's a fucking crazy idea. Now, engineers go figure out how to make crazy idea work. Steve Jobs style. Occasionally, those ideas are fun and whimsical

and yield fun cars. And I think, but those ideas are what drive the hype of Tesla and the sale of stock, which is really the sale of stock and not the sale of cars is why Tesla is valued where it is. And so, unfortunately, their hype machine needs to keep going and so i don't believe and maybe i'll be wrong but i've said it a bunch of places but i don't believe that the movie prop cyber truck you saw on stage that he smashed the fucking window with which is one of the greatest videos one of the greatest videos of all time. I don't think what you would see, if they do make a truck, a pickup truck,

and call it Cybertruck, it's not really going to look anything like that. And so I would take a very wait-and-see approach, and I would not plan any car-buying decisions based on availability of that vehicle. So why do you think the the cyber truck won't be made there's a reason that cars don't really look like that right now and the reason is typically is is regulatory um part of it is just consumer resistance right consumer resistance well

first off you can't build a car with that's an exoskeleton like that where the whole body is just because because of how many cars though right like there's unibody no unibody is different we're not he's not talking about unibody he's talking about where the body is this like the structure and it's it's a it's it's not it will not meet first off the euro pedestrian standards at all, which are much stricter than U.S.'s, but I don't think it'll meet the U.S.'s either. If it did, the only way it would is if you called it a certain class level of commercial truck, which, okay, maybe they'll do that. of commercial truck, which, okay, maybe they'll do that. But wouldn't it be kind of fucked up for this company that's sort of preaching environmentalism and sort of the moral authority to build something that was intentionally heavier to skirt a pedestrian safety regulation. Like to me, that's like real grimy. And, um, and I,

I just think, and again, I may be proven wrong. I don't know everything there is to know about car design. I don't know everything there is to know about engineering far from it, but I know a bunch of car designers and know a bunch of engineers and they're all like, bunch of car designers and know a bunch of engineers and they're all like no and and they didn't have they don't actually have to build it the way they showed it for it to do what it had to do what it had to do was get a bunch of people excited excited enough to to put down a very low deposit amount so that they could turn around and go to big banks and go, we have a new product with 200,000 orders, pre-orders, now give us a billion dollars. And that's what they did. And that billion, that giant loan, and I don't know the exact amount, but it's an enormous amount of money in the nine figures.

That loan is not contingent or that money is not contingent on building the exact Cybertruck they showed on stage. So they could back walk that and change anything and build a fairly normal looking vehicle at the end of the day. And they still got their money. They still got their valuation. Is that what you might think? Is that it is going to end up being a really way more traditional looking truck maybe the front is a little more angled but it's like a ford on the back yeah i mean i think that ultimately if we end up with if they end up making a pickup truck of some kind that it will look a lot

ultimately like that rivian R1T pickup truck, which has a little more. I don't like the look of that. I don't like certain elements of it, but I think a pickup truck has got to be a fucking pickup truck. There's only so many people that in reality really want to drive a Total Recall movie prop. Elon's only seen two movies, Total Rec movies total recall and space balls is the only two

i fucking love total recall um uh those calico machine guns are running around with on mars anything about total recall i fucking love it i bought a calico machine gun just because they used them in total recall so that's awesome all right i want to talk about the review for a second we get get skirt right past that. That truck is cool. And I like what they did. It's cool. So electric trucks aren't great at some truck things.

You know, if you're a landscaping company and you're pulling a trailer with you everywhere you go and the thing is completely wind, whatever, wind resistant, I guess, the opposite of aerodynamics. So it's got that big tailgate that drags through the air everywhere. Electric trucks are probably not the best truck for that job. It's got a lot of weight. Towing an EV is bad. Right. But if you have a truck for some other reason, because you take your mountain bike to the trails all the time,

because I have a paramotor that's an uncommon use case, because you like kayaking or whatever, the Rivian is so perfect for you these light large loads you know if you're a camper yeah you know and rivian doesn't seem to be pretending that 18 years from now it'll be a clapped out landscaping truck they're like no no you're an engineer who plays trail enthusiast on the weekends do i have the car for you? And it's perfect for that. And I like that they didn't pretend they were something else.

A diesel replacement. Yeah. No, it's a light. It's a light used truck. Huh? Do you like the way these look? Like, I'm just looking at the gallery. So I wasn't familiar with the problem.

Like, all I care about is from the side. It looks just ridiculous. Oh, it looks awful. That to me looks like a Tacoma from the side it looks just ridiculous oh it looks awful that that to me looks like a tacoma on the side from like several years ago and the front it looks like it's like an electric razor it looks like one of those european cars that you don't even know the name of like with the headlights you're like what is that oh it's uh who got yeah that's the alfa romeo who gives? I know exactly what you're talking about. You're talking about like a Fiat Multipla or something like that.

Yeah, like something they don't have here. It's got like four small seats and it's like a super frog looking. It's made for those narrow ass European roads that just has no use. And those narrow ass European people. Yeah, exactly. All right. I want to

make a large man i don't know you don't like how the ravine looks you know whatever you don't like how it looks what can i do what can i tell you but um i i think it's it's it's real it's the the one you can buy i don't know if you can buy it just yet but i think pretty soon i don't know what they're doing with their dealer network starting a car company is very very hard okay and soon, I don't know what they're doing with their dealer network. Starting a car company is very, very hard. Okay. And, and,

and I don't think everything that Tesla does has been bad or wrong. I think one of the reasons they've been so successful during the pandemic is you fucking buy their shit on a website, like everything else, like everything online ordering is amazing. And, and so buying a, why should buying a car be different?

And that is very appealing to a lot of people. I don't think, I don't think the rest of the car making universe understands quite how much everyone hates their dealers. And so eliminating dealers is really appealing to the general consumer. And also if you're not that into cars, if you're not that into cars if you're not that into cars a tesla as an extension of your cell phone i i totally get it i totally get it i absolutely get it we had another car person on what's his name thank you vin wiki you probably you live in the same circles ed ed boleyn i just saw him last week. I just did some stories for him on his show. There's a good guy.

Oh, that's cool. Are they uploaded yet? I fucking did like 12 of them in four or five hours. I gave myself a 10-hour layover in Atlanta to go do a bunch of them to promote my new show, which is called Sorted. It's a tuner car shootout, if you're interested in that kind of thing. Old school magazine style tuner car shootout um if you're interested in that kind of thing old school magazine style tuner car shootout it's on youtube but you can find all the episodes at sorted or not.com um new episodes every week and so i went to go do some things i did like 12 stories in four hours and then went back to the airport and flew home so what was what was ed saying about what he called a tesla as a car an appliance right yes and somehow that seemed really fitting you know appliances kind of just work right they

they're electric oftentimes they're many of them are just like the other ones and the best one is always the newest one. There's no nostalgia for an appliance. There's no emotional connection. No one really wants a 2013 Model 3. You know what I mean? They're not going to be collectible. I think they're lovely for what they are, but I think that they are among the world's first truly disposable cars. Interesting.

Because it's like a PC or a phone. The best ones. Are you guys fucking gaming on Pentiums for fun? Nah, you're not. There's no nostalgia for that shit. You're not like, yo, bro, I fucking ironically check out my iPhone 1 I'm using. Fucking fashion statement. If Apple reintroduced the iphone

one it would sell like hotcakes well as a case yeah but not as at all not as the functionality like mechanical watches records old manual transmission cars these are things you engage with right and you remember the way you engage with them sticks to you and so you you go back 20 years later and you get in that air-cooled car and you smell it and it makes it vibrates in the same way and the shifter goes in in the same way and it takes you back but there's no you're not going to get on your your power pc that you had in 1991 and go man i really as it goes fucking prodigy and you're like oh it really takes me back don't answer the phone all right so you so you've mostly convinced me now if tesla does release the

truck that looks like the truck that they showed and it has to be fucking sick i just really my rational brain says to me that it's this is some hypey movie prop bullshit and they'll web they'll walk it back and i don't want you to base your car buying decision on that yeah i hear you but well you know i if it comes out it looks like that it performs like they say at the price point that they have at fifty thousand dollars if that thing is going zero to 60 and 3.2 or whatever they said, it's like, all right. It won't do all those things.

By the way, Tesla, one of the things they do is they make all these claims. They go, it's going to do zero to 60 and two five. It's going to go 400 miles. It's going to go this, it's going to cost 50 grand.

The, what that means is a version of it will do two five a version of it will do 400 miles a version of it will have this whole special thing a version of it will cost 50 well then they're just one yes that's what they do because on their website they have each version they have each version's price point and then those stats listed for each price point separately. I hope that's something. I believe you. I'm not saying that it will do those things.

I'm saying that if it does do those things, I'm sold because I want to wrap that thing and like it's a halo fucking warthog with that like darn green. Put a wrap on that thing and just some black wheels and uh that'll be alive for a few years but look i like total recall too man i'm yeah i want a johnny cab like fucking everybody else wants a johnny cab rips him out of the fucking socket it's great well that's another thing is people is people i like to talk to a lot of people on podcasts about what people perceive as the inevitable future of autonomous cars, as if that's just our predetermined future and we just are going to get there and have to get there. And it sort of justifies itself, right? It's like a manifest destiny kind of thing.

But I always like to remind them that in the last 20 minutes of every fucking future movie the same shit happens either the hero wrestles back control from an autonomous vehicle and gets it into self-drive or they find some old car or motorcycle from the pre-av area and they're like freedom and drive it out a building or some shit. The end of the movie is always they always reclaim the driving freedom, man. I was a terrible Star Trek fan.

Kyle's incorrect on this regard. It was awful. The key to space problems is base jumping and motocross and skateboarding. The first one was good. The second tour. I have to keep the core from melting down, but this car won't start without my COVID chip.

All right. So if it's not the Cybertruck, I've been driving the same SS Camaro for nine years now. I want to get a new one. I mean, nine years, you must have liked it at least a little bit. I love it.

I still love it. There's nothing wrong with it. I've got 90,000 miles on it. It's never had an issue. It's still as fast as I want to go and need to go. That's the time to sell. Yeah, probably sell. 90,000 miles, never had an issue.

Sell. Sell. It will never be a better time to sell. The closer you get to 100,000 miles, you should wait until you see the cliff your car goes off in value the second it has a six-digit mileage reading. I'm serious. 90 is a good time.

I think I'll just keep it forever, though. I think I'll just keep it forever. We'll do that. Yeah. I don't have any interest in getting a $9,000 or $10,000 out of it. What else? Probably Camaro or Mustang. That's kind of like like like what i'm thinking like you're really really expanding your horizons i mean this is why i'm asking you if there's

something else like you know like a fifty thousand dollar price point like a higher end camaro or mustang it seems like if you're keeping your old camaro your other car should have a different mission right it could be right? It could be, it could be trucks. It could be a daily driver Camaro. And the other can be special occasion. Camaro. No,

you need, you don't, you don't need a backseat. You don't need any utility or anything like that. You're cool with a, with a, with a, all right.

I mean, look, both the new camaro and the new mustangs are pretty nice my advice if you're gonna get a mustang is find a way to get the shelby and not a gt based one and the real reason i say that is the end well the engine is very special but also the transmission the shelby has a different transmission than the regular first off we're talking about a manual gearbox right i'd honestly prefer an automatic i don't know well that eliminates shelby um in that case it doesn't matter because both the camaro and the mustang use the exact same automatic transmission

10 speed uh automatic 10 speeds probably f-150 and silver auto and everything basically has it now yeah it must be good right now and like sometimes i'm gonna stop and go traffic and i can just imagine just working a working a manual and it's not appealing understandable but it just means you can't get the shelby unless you want to find a way to get save get 80 grand together and get a 500 because that's the best if you're gonna have ever ever sports cars you could have an auto and a stick just tossing that out there no good point it's a very good point i'll give the old one to my dad or something and let him turn it into some sort of a weird frankenstein car

okay well look okay for 50 grand if you wanted something different that was very fun to drive and practical enough to use every day and it was automatic um the volkswagen golf r is always great it's really comfortable it's really fast the um it's a low testosterone car maybe a cabriolet not a problem like uh is there a problem does there bug kyle vespas look fun i ride a fucking vespa every day it's the shit i have no yeah i still wear heelys nobody's judging you guess who's not laughing as i've got all my groceries looped up on the slight decline to the parking lot. Guess who's not laughing?

Micromobility. No one. Dude, I'm buying Heelys. Oh, my God. Bro, if you were in Venice right now, if you were in my town rolling Heelys, people would be like, oh, shit, where can I buy those now? You can buy those again? Where'd you get them? Where'd you get them?

How much? Damn, I think that Heelys guy had one of those watches with 10 counterbalancing mechanisms in it. Damn, that guy rocks. He's got glasses with no frames in it. The Healy's guy probably cashed out. He probably does have one of those crazy watches. He probably cashed right out. Oh, yeah.

Well, look, I mean, honestly, the new Mustang and the new Camaro are great. I mean, I don't have a lot of $50,000 competition for those. I mean, you can go back to Challengers, but that's a really old car at this point. I'm driving the new BMW 4 Series with the giant rabbit teeth. Have you seen that? The crazy new mouth on the 4 Series. If you really want to have a shocker, Google 2021 BMW 4 Series and look at the front end. It's really gnarly.

But, I mean, we only want brand new cars. I'd be open to a used car. Like, I don't know, if there was a Vette a couple years old. I mean, $50,000 gets you a lot of Corvette. It really does. You can get a bunch of Corvette. It gets you a pretty decent amount of Porsche if you're interested in Porsche.

I have the maintenance on a Porsche. I don't want to be doing that. Did you bring me coffee? I'm looking at this 4 Series Beamer. He brought me fucking coffee. I'm doing a show. Is everything kosher down there? all right i must have just pulled the trigger just pulled the trigger on some 80 dollar heelys did you actually just buy heelys yeah that's gonna be fun dude when we do the

live show bring them i'll bring my heelys i had to go to the fourth listing though because all of them were by size and it was like small kid big kid and you have to you have to find one for the last time i went online shopping while doing a live podcast the fucking audience members kept buying shit kept buying the shit i was like oh look at this gone what the fuck dude we should do a fan meetup and have everyone who hasn't bring heelys everyone who stick be taylor me there's a sex club, so you can all suck each other's cocks while you're at it. Oh, okay, right. We'll do it in the back of your fucking Volkswagen.

I'm not buying a Volkswagen. He's the one that wants me to buy a Volkswagen. What's wrong with the Volkswagen? Matt was talking about something speedy that was fun to drive. How about this? how about lightly used because they just stopped making them

but 50 grand gets you all of it a Chevy SS like the sedan the LS powered it's the Corvette sedan or how about a Cadillac CTS-V how about like a 2000, how about like a 98 town car

I don't think, I think you guys How about like a 98 town car? I think your age stereotypes are a little off. I think we need to recalibrate. I'm looking for more of a car that a woman would want to get into. Oh, get the fuck out of here. Like a 22-year-old

woman, not a 25-year-old. Oh, it the fuck out of here. Like a 22-year-old woman, not a, you know. Oh, it's nice and high off the ground. If you want to meet terrible trash women, you need a Corvette. If you want to meet 22-year-olds, then take the He-Man. All right, settled then. I'll get a couple-year-old Corvette. That's it. I'm not going to fuck around and be dead

straight with you. If you really want to meet high quality women No. I know you do around here but you're way off. I'm serious. You are a fucking sexy Italian. You get a scarf and a leather jacket and you roll a

Vespa and you are a classy gentleman. Classy gentleman. Or you get one of my off-road Porsche. My Safari 911. When you have a Safari 911, you are a man of mystery, especially when it's pink. I think you can probably see it. The mystery is what kind of guy does he like to fuck?

Wall of cars outside my window. You do have a wall of cars. My Porsche is down there. I have my off-road Porsche. There's some other... You have an automobile vending machine in there. Yeah, it's like full-size Hot Wheels down there. Do you want to take a tour

in a second? Yeah, that'd be awesome. All right, in a second. Let me just have some more of my coffee because I need some up to counterbalance this. The down, yes. more of my coffee because i need to make i need i need some up to counterbalance um this the down yes yeah i shout out to my sponsor tradecraft farms the official ganja of the smoke entire podcast fire son all these are these new pens that are fucking 94 they're serious oh that's an a shout out to my probation officer who drug tested me last

tuesday ah that means you're good for a while good for a while where are you guys at in the country again i forget atlanta atlanta raleigh all of you are atlanta so i'm in st louis raleigh st louis raleigh wow okay good we got the south southeast spread yeah. The whole SEC area. We win the championships. Okay. We'll see. Next time people can see each other, we can do it. What's centralized there? Can we do Buffalo Trace in Kentucky?

Colorado is our central meeting point as soon as I'm off of my federal probation. I think that's the closest location to all of us. Not because of the weed. Kyle's a snow bunny. Loves to ski. California is my favorite

state currently. Colorado is my second favorite state. You can do pretty much everything in Colorado. It's a little too dry, but that's okay. Good state. It's a very, very fun state. Lots of opportunities there. You talking about alcohol or weather? No, dry.

You get dry. Like, your skin gets dry. Even here, it's that part of the season. Every year, I'm like, this is the year I start using lotion. Never. It always gets to the point that it's like, you grab a pen and your finger crafts, and it's like, damn it, I lost the battle again.

Next year. My fans were giving me mad shit about ashy elbows my fans were watching me drive and they're like I'm trying to watch this car review but all I see is Matt's ashy elbows I've linked you so many times to what kind of lotion you should be using I've literally bought some and I will

it's not part of my routine so I don't think to put it on. And if I ever do, it's one of those Corvettes are pretty affordable after a couple of years. Yeah. Yeah. Corvettes like right now actually is a great time to, to, to get a, if you want a front engine Corvette,

now's a good time to get it because all the hype is on the new mid engine Corvette, which I mean, look, if, if you can i mean if you can you know make the budget happen the new corvette is incredible really really really incredible car yeah you could definitely it's not six figures the new corvette is like 65 000 and you could definitely definitely attract trashy women with it especially young ones because it does look because mid-engine more like a ferrari or something man is there a car that attracts even trashier women than the corvette ice cream truck viper i'm not dealing with viper i've driven a hundred percent the clutch was so goddamn stiff

i don't want to do it and it was like burning my left leg the whole fucking time like like the the the the heat shielding on that pipe that's coming down the side it's like what about maybe a harley davidson can we get trashier than a viper maybe a motorcycle uh yeah i mean if you want but that's uh you're you're skewing old there you're skewing older young young you know what just i actually really thought about the the vehicle i in my experience now granted i look like this so in my experience, now granted, I look like this. So in my experience, it doesn't really matter what I'm driving. The women are not just flocking, right?

But the vehicle I have driven, two vehicles, both from the same company, in which I have never in my entire life experienced a reaction from females, is Morgan. The Morgan three-wheeler and the Morgan plus four. When you drive one of those, not only are they both very fun to drive, they're both mildly crappy in terms of they break a lot and whatever there's British and old designs. But when you drive one of those, you are like man, a mystery. You are fun. You don't take yourself too seriously you they can't tell if the car is old or new and it doesn't really matter um but if you're like you're not threatening you're but like you're but you've got you've clearly got some money to to waste on something as silly as gonna

say i bet this car pairs nicely with a gold Submariner. Something like that. I can't remember women just tapping it on the side to just Morgans are fucking awesome man. The Morgan plus four and the Morgan arrow and the Morgan three-wheeler. If you really want a positive

reaction from genuine positivity from women, they really want to talk to you about what this thing is and get in and ride with you a morgan for sure uh i've been in a three-wheel morgan i can't he uh it's it's he owns like part of this club in new york called the box oh alex roy yeah of course you've been in alex roy's three-wheeler yeah yeah yeah he's my homie he's my super homie yeah just driving me around give me a tour of new york oh it's him driving you around manhattan too right hauling so much ass and it's so fucking loud it's like it sounds like a motorcycle like a harley it is it's a harley engine it is a harley

engine that's why the best thing about a morgan three-wheeler as you probably learned with alex is that the laws just don't apply to you at all no i'm pretty sure we were supposed to be wearing helmets that's pretty sure yeah we got pulled over by undercover nypd and he didn't even let them talk he just gave him tickets to his next show like it was bizarre it was a fun night that guy's a wild man this is very interesting in a morgan three-wheeler how much is a morgan three-wheeler Very interesting in a Morgan three-wheeler. How much is a Morgan three-wheeler? $50,000. It's a weird price for a toy, right?

Yeah. There are a lot of people in America who can swing a $50,000 toy. It's not a stupid, stupid amount of money, but it is a lot of money for a toy. It's a lot of money. Taylor, you could buy this. If this is what you really wanted, you could have this. Right. Yeah, yeah.

You could. But also, this three-wheeler, it looks like the kind of thing where an airplane crashed 50 miles from where they need to be in the desert, and they had to cobble together a vehicle and make it there for the extraction point. That's what this is. That's a really good description of that, actually. And you know what? It drives like that, too. It's a little rumbly on there it's super rumbly

I mean seriously it's like being fucking Baron von Munchausen dude I'm looking at this I could put this in the stable I've got storage for this I'm just not that kind of financial masochist you buy shit like this

you know if you buy one that's used that's had the shit kind of gone through um because there's they have what they call a heavy duty package which basically alex roy invented by breaking his a dozen times a dozen ways so alex has had like three Morgan three-wheelers. He bent the chassis on one because the problem with a Morgan three-wheeler or any three-wheeled vehicle is that you can't straddle anything. You either, you hit the pothole with one of the three. It's just a matter of which one. So,

you know, that can have some disastrous results. On the other hand, it is, it is a truly unique motoring experience, unavailable anywhere else at any price. And Alex and I call it the best fourth car ever because if you've got a regular car, you've got a sports car, you've got a vintage car, this is the level beyond that it's the fourth car this is where like you just need to scratch that itch for another car it's so it's pure energy it's not like it's not like the the new mclaren 765 that i just drove it's basically driving an indie car on the street just so crazy this this is just energy assaulted at you in a in a way that no other vehicle can do um i've never seen something right yeah like like we pulled up in front of his club and there was a line outside who is this big line of people

alex roy his name is alex he's a an author and he is a road tripper and automotive journalist he's kind of a can't one of the the canon mall guys the guys who race across the country and he works at a an autonomous vehicle research company he's really interesting he's a really interesting person he's got he's got his hand in a couple little nightclubs around new york city he's kind of like a uh bit of a socialite. He looks ridiculous. He was wearing that jacket. He was wearing that jacket. He had covered in all these

medals and medallions. The fake police jackets. Yeah, yeah. It was absurd. It was like a German police jacket covered with medals and medallions and shit. When I take you downstairs, I'll show you mine. He looked like a North Korean general. He looked like a North Korean general just covered with fucking medallions and uh when we pulled up in front of his club there must have been a hundred people in line outside everybody

stopped and looked because you know they wanted to know what that explosion was that just pulled up it was so goddamn loud like uncle buck picking up the kids at school yeah there's never been anything more conspicuous than that fucking car we pulled up and got out and then walked to the front of the line and i know they must have been thinking who's that space man who just arrived like we're looking at looking at alex it was it was nuts yeah it was really funny his money the nightclubs uh inherited some of it a lot of it almost all of of it. That's a good way to end it. His father started a very big rental car agency in Europe called Europe by Car, which when he passed away in, I don't know, 2002 or 2003,

Alex took over ownership of, and he ran it for a while and eventually sold out to somebody. And he has since spent a lot of time writing about cars. And he's a very good writer. He also wrote a book. And he now works at Argo AI, which does autonomous vehicle development. And they just signed a massive, massive deal with Ford as a partner, which is pretty cool. Good for them. And he also is a partner in a very high-end stereo store. Not like Buck's Super Stereo World.

They're a dealer for Macintosh and those crazy fucking damn shits where you've got to sit in one chair in the middle of the room, whatever. Have you ever been to his club, The Box? I box i have yes what was on the menu that night what what was the wildest thing you saw on stage i mean there was like midgets and like you know circus performers but also some like burlesque shit i what i remember most about the box was that i got two red bull and vodkas this was a long time ago when I drank Red Bull and vodka. I got one for me and one for my friend and I remember the bill was $48. I got two Red Bull and vodkas.

I ordered bottle service which is a bottle of Absolute vodka, a bottle of orange juice and a bottle of cranberry juice and maybe a couple of Red Bulls and it was $800. $800? Do you know how much a bottle of Absolute is at the store? Like $30.

No. $38. $13. Oh, it was the big bottle. You're paying for the service, Brock. But we were right next to the fucking stage, and immediately two hot chicks came over and sat on my lap and my buddy's lap just so they could get to the alcohol.

Yes. That's what you'll be doing. my lap and my buddy's lap just so they could get to the alcohol um but i saw a woman i'm actually not sure about the genders so i saw one individual lead another individual out on a leash and then like beat the shit out of him and then they're like put whipped cream the one in charge put whipped cream in their ass crack and like forced the other one to eat the whipped cream and then i want to say at one point i think that was a female um shoved this big butt plug dog tail up the uh one on all fours ass and he definitely didn't like it he was he was like ah it was like that it was like that scene in pulp fiction it was that look on marcellus Wallace's face. Who is this for? This doesn't sound like anyone. This is for the whole crowd.

Oh, we were cheering. We were cheering like the hometown team to score a touchdown. It was like, yeah! Get it up there! This is what happens when you skip out on your tab. You also get quasi-raped in front of them. Tuesdays at the box.

I was out with Alex at some club in New York. There was a Russian bar underground. It was fucking cool as hell. And we're drinking there. And about 40 minutes into us being there, he was like, I think I own part of this place. And we went and got the manager. And the manager confirmed that he did actually

that story that i just told her there makes him sound like kind of an asshole and that story took place in his peak cocaine years he no longer does cocaine and he will laugh upon those times fondly because he didn't hurt too many people during those times but that was peak cocaine alex he was mostly just forgetting what assets he owned pretty much because he didn't hurt too many people during those times. But that was Pete Cocaine, Alex. He was mostly just forgetting what assets he owned. Pretty much. That's more like Arthur than fucking anything else, right? But he's really smart.

He's really kind of like a philosopher, actually, if such a thing exists today. Yeah, yeah. That was one of the weirdest nights of my life. We were on a rooftop. I can't remember what it's called called it's some sort of rich kid club like i don't know they pay a hundred thousand dollars a year and you get to be a member of this club and use their fucking facilities and we're on the roof oh it's like solo house right yeah yeah yeah yeah he's a member on the roof having drinks and it's like me a lamborghini racing male model who's my buddy and um uh who's the guy who won

the medal of honor that year um fucking a medal of honor winner he just had been on bill o'reilly he's with the american sniper no no not that guy he didn't win the medal no it was um the guy he shot uh his name's um. Dakota Meyer. Dakota Meyer. Oh, yeah. I remember that guy. And he's got like a colonel as his handler to like make sure Dakota Meyer in no way disgraces the United States. And also that nobody beats up Dakota Meyer in the streets or something.

So it's like this straight laced, like crew cut, like gray haired colonel who's shithoused drunk, just out of his mind, wasted. They didn't say I had to stay stay sober and then we ran into nobody care if i disgrace the uniform have another water and then we run into alex so he fit right in with the group yeah you know yeah it was uh it was an interesting night i feel like i've heard the alex's version of the dakota meyer story before i feel like i feel like that's how alex has run into some because after he when he he so the cannonball record right you know new york to la cannonball record was uh was 3207 and that was set in 1983 and alex in 2006 and his friend dave maher beat it and did a 3104.

And that was like a pretty big deal because it had been a very long time. And people really thought that with modern traffic, it wasn't possible. The roads were emptier back then and blah, blah, blah. And Alex used like modern technology or as modern as was available at the time, these weather charts and police frequencies and all kinds of crazy shit and so and then he wrote a book about it and he waited smartly until the statute of limitations was up to publish the book but the book talking about how he did it it got him all these like government speaking gigs he started going to speak at the

fbi and all this shit about like countermeasures and like all this wild stuff and so he ended up like just occasionally being around like really really weird random government adjacent kind of people yeah that's how he got an investment to go after cannonballers right like just in case we've got a speeder no no he wasn't no he wasn't he wasn't he wasn't teaching the government how to go after other cannonballers he was teaching they were trying to use his techniques for like preparation to like drive fast like for like convoying across other countries i mean i don't know he never really actually talked about what they talked about at the fbi but maybe eventually he'll share with me yeah he told me that basically they were like

how did you do this we want to know how you did this thing you did yeah and uh i don't know they they really went into like what they were going to do with that information but they wanted to know how the fuck he did what he did yeah he had a plane flying overhead you know he did he did right so what we're going to have countermeasures and people have cessnas out in front of their cars jamming well by the way i think it's more like weaponizing what he did potentially by the way we're back we're going back in time like 14 years at this point you had ed on i mean these people are running 25s now dude yeah. Yeah. 25 hours there. They're cutting six hours off of Alex's time.

And Alex got to go talk to the government afterwards. Like, what the fuck is going on? Like, the people that are doing it, especially, like, it's a bit controversial. And I'm not really deep in that world, but they always come talk to me about it, what they're calling the COVID cannonballs. They always come talk to me about it, what they're calling the COVID cannonballs. Because the question is, because the roads are so empty, the time got – so Alex did like a 31.04, and then Ed beat Alex. He did a 29-something. And then this dude Doug did like a 28, right?

But then in this year alone, I think like 10 new records were set because the roads were empty. There's got to be an asterisk there because that's not fair. Like there's no traffic. They got to take it from March on. All those have a little. This was during COVID. So in the beginning, in the beginning, there was this all sort of holier than thou kind of bullshit.

And it was like, well, what if you cause an accident and an ambulance for you and a hospital bed for you man means that someone who's got covid and so there was there was that in the beginning not for me but there was that in the beginning and then that went away very very quickly yeah and then and then now it's all sort of like well the times just don't really count as much nobody really after the first like you know 48 hours of outrage does nobody fucking yeah they the times just don't really count as much. Nobody really, after the first like, you know, 48 hours of outrage,

there's nobody fucking. Yeah, they don't count as much. Like, like if you bring up like Babe Ruth's home runs in earnest, it's like, get fucking real. Come on. That guy,

that guy who's like the guy pitching against him had to like leave in the seventh inning to go run a paint store. That's not, that's not fucking impressive. These guys would be like, yeah, he was in the major leagues for 25 years, and then he retired to run a fuel station in Arizona. It's like, come on. Or like Mark McGuire's Sammy Sosa home runs, right?

You got to put the asterisks, right? Or Lance Armstrong, Tour de France, right? You got to put the asterisks. Yeah, you don't have a problem with asterisks and Mark McGuire, do you, Taylor? Of course I do. I remember thinking – no, I actually don't have a problem with astroskin mark mcguire do you taylor of course i do i remember thinking no i i actually don't it was just because i'm there so i remember just seeing i like my thighs yeah they were but it was those pictures of him gripping the bat he's just he's grabbing it so hard and i was always convinced like damn come on hit it in the big Mac land again.

And if he hit it into the big Mac land, we all got big Macs. And he was on like a McDonald's made a terrible decision because they put it exactly where a right-handed guy is going to hit it. And so it was just like, Hey, I know three days in a row, big Macs.

Taylor right there in left field, 350 feet away. There's a big bullseye. And he's like a semi-pro with will ferrell corn dogs as i was a kid my i remember my thought for years being like this guy's such a big deal mcdonald's took notice and named a burger after him oh that's good i was like i was like eight or nine. I got a McGuire rookie card. Because, you know, I mean, like, yeah, ooh, right?

I just watched that. There's a documentary. Have you guys seen it about, like, whatever happened to sports card collecting? No. Oh, I don't remember the name of it. But the guy pretty much goes into why, like, sports cards from the 90s and shit are worth fucking zilch. And it's basically because the entire market was fraudulent. It's kind of an interesting story, but yeah,

fraudulent market. But I've got a McGuire rookie card, and he's like this scrawny little dude. It's like, I just got to see the cards just next to each other, like the first year, last year. Bonds is the same way. Bonds was like a speedy base stealer.

And then all of a sudden, he's this muscle monster with armor on at the plate. Yeah, he was like a speedy uh you know base stealer and then all of a sudden he's this muscle monster with armor on at the plate yeah he was like west wasn't like wesley snipes in major league based on early bonds i think it probably i think it was i was into baseball card collecting in the early 90s and i'm one of the few guys i know that made a nice profit on it i sold my cards and bought did you really I bought a motorcycle with my profits. So where was the peak? I think I bought the bike in like 94, something like that.

Oh, yeah. Oh, so yeah, you were really ahead of the curve. Maybe a little earlier. Maybe earlier than that, 92, 93. But in any case, I'm still waiting for my beanie babies to mature. I mean, most people were thinking of holding those cards for like 20 years. If you held them for three

and still sold them in the hype, you're you're the only you're fucking smart person in the entire well or a person who really wanted a motorcycle do you still have the motorcycle is the question that would be amazing no i don't have that bike what kind of what kind of bike was it it was a honda interceptor 500 that's a cool bike. My first bike. It was, I mean, to 17, 18 year old me, it was very cool. This is a pretty cool thing about, I was reading Mark McGuire.

There's an article from 2011. It says, according to Bell, his ex-girlfriend, beginning around 2000, Bonds, this is about Barry Bonds, testicles underwent a transformation. Specifically, they were smaller and unusual different shape. Bell also testified about how he developed acne on his shoulders,

couldn't keep an erection, and became increasingly violent, once threatening to rip out her breast implants because he'd paid for them. I don't want to laugh, but fuck. Barry was doing stuff. I will laugh, and I will. More Plates, More Dates did a video today about what it's like to be on Tren. Did anyone else see it?

No, but I'm aware of what it's like to be on Tren. T-R-E-N? Is the full name Trenbalone? Trenbalone. Yeah. Is that like an HGH kind of deal? No, it's like a hardcore steroid. Yeah.

Oh, okay. I'm just naturally this big. It's a horse steroid? T i don't i'm just naturally this big you got it's a horse steroid is it really is uh it like look if you have to get awesome looking fast tremble own is the risk you take it is the this is the full deal the risk you take right right like there are some safer steroids there are some that occur naturally in your body and then there is this gold sparkling glitter nitrous oxide of steroids that you could take it that is tremble on and uh the guy is talking about it and it sounds a lot like being on pms emotionally you know like like things

that you might find you know like like everyone's been grumpy. You know, you understand what it's like to be grumpy. You feel like your upsetness is justified, but everyone else feels like you're blowing small things out of proportion. This is how I describe being on trend, that you're just, it sounded like PMS. And I'm like, man, if you're going to do a trend cycle, you might just explain to everyone else around you that you're going to be a little crazy with paranoia and aggressiveness and just explain to everyone else around you that you're gonna be a little crazy

with paranoia and aggressiveness and just unable to handle all of life's emotional bumps in the road did he talk about the cough he mentioned the cough but he didn't talk about it much i guess there's a cough it's i mean it is a hacking uncontrollable cough that you will think you are dying from um that you you'll get just about every day that that you can't stop coughing and it's that cough we've all been like really bad really sick before and you cough and cough and when you're done coughing you have to catch your breath and like brace your you're all red face you're just like oh that was bad and oh that's good good. During a respiratory pandemic. Yeah, they'll fucking love you. Just fucking wheezing

and coughing. Good luck convincing them you don't have coronavirus. Every day on this steroid, you will just... Is it like the same time every morning after breakfast? It's like, all right, well, just randomly. Time for a hacking fit. You guys really sold me on this.

Where do I buy it? You look like Wolverine. This is a hacking fit. You guys really sold me on this. I tell you. You look like Wolverine. That's a side effect I had no idea about. That sounds fucking awful. I don't want to deal with one random, intense, unpleasant, coughing fit a day. Taylor, you just deal with it for a couple of weeks, and then you look like Wolverine. I don't look like Wolverine. I don't look like Wolverine either. It's literally what he suggests that

Hugh Jackman took for the last Wolverine movie to get super vascular and all dried out. Taylor worried about enlarged heart. You're fucking stuck. Think about getting your heart bored out. Bigger valves. I assume this is good.

It sounds good. That's what vasodilators do. The human heart is like a Subaru engine. When you push it past about 350 wheel, it just goes bang. It's just coughing all the time because you're so overloaded. Do you guys want to go on a quick tour before my

boys start mopping? Before they make the floor wet? I got to unplug my good audio, so you're going to have to deal with onboard, all right? All right. Input device. Here we go. All right.

Are these investment cars? Do you fix them? My business, right here, on top of making videos, my exit from the gig economy is called Westside Collector Car Storage. And it is for customers to store their collector cars. I also keep my cars here. But I live on the west side of L.A. and by the beach.

And there's just this type of business doesn't exist in this area so i built this bought this property built this building and i'm gonna show you some cool shit but first check this out this is my studio this is the smug entire podcast studio nice do you also still have a watch podcast it had a really clever name no the watch and listen and uh i after two years of it i just i couldn't do the research of watch research anymore i had to either get snobbier or nerdier and i was neither so here's my here's the lounge upstairs cigar lounge right engine block coffee table this sounds like the social aspect of the club is part of the draw you meet people people like you. Yeah, you'd think, but people don't really hang out.

That lounge, you have to have a lounge because it's a thing you have to have. But it's really for – and, of course, members are more than welcome to hang out. But the fact of the matter is they don't hang out very often. I use it for hanging out with my friends more often than with customers. That might be part of the sales pitch, right? Sometimes you buy things even – It's where you tell them the price in the tour. All right.

All right. So we're going to go into what we call the cathedral room. All the cars. In the cathedral room, we've got... These are the first ever quad vehicle stackers installed indoors. It's the first time they've been installed over a basement because we have a 40 car underground level below this. And it's the first time they've been installed with battery tenders integrated. You can see these reels.

Those coil up battery tenders. They go up to the top level. And first time they've got sprinklers integrated for their sprinkler nozzles the whole way up. And we've got crazy ventilation system up there. So we can run about 10 cars in this room at a time. How old is this business? Wow. I bought the property in 2016 we've been open three months we opened in september 1st this is exciting you know what you don't have a lot of vacancy like you have filled i'll show you i'll show you we've got some but i'll show you so okay derek back there is doing a crazy paint correction so this is a buick gnx very rare car version of the Grand National.

So he's doing, you can see they tape off the trim. And so this is a pretty low mile car. And like, let's see if I can get you like a reflection of the ceiling. Yeah. It's pretty sick. We've got What's the total

capacity there? So we can hold 110 operating or about 130 max capacity 130 if we park cars in the aisles and stuff here's my new new old ferrari it's a 328 gts and then this is my my affront to masculinity my off--road pink Porsche. It's actually called Casis Red, but it's got a four-inch lift and a hot rod motor. And the interior is very fun. I'll show you the interior. We use city bus fabric. Oh, my God.

So it's really, really fabulous interior. That is a disgusting car. It's fucking awesome. This thing rules. It's the best L.A. car ever. And, and uh you know you got a bunch of good stuff up here uh some old stuff there's a little zr1 there porsche um some supercars back here and then we've got the whole other the big wall you have behind me and that wall is tandem so there's two deep. Are there a handful of celebrity clients? Just guessing by the cars maybe.

You know, there's a couple of clients that we have that you might call corporate type celebrities. Like you maybe haven't heard of them but maybe you've heard of the business that they run. That kind of thing. We're in Silicon Beach

over here so we've got Google. That's my friend Chef Carl Ruiz. I'll portrait him. Let me see. I think this will work. I think I can go downstairs. My Wi-Fi should work the whole way, so we're going to try this. This is cool.

No one who's like, oh my god, that A-list celebrity. How's the connection? Good? This is amazing. We're in like a concrete... We're in like a concrete basement. Oh no.

There he is. Am I here? Oh, did I go away? You're back now. I'm back? Okay, cool. So these lights I really am proud of. They're really beautiful, but this is our underground level, and look what I have. Oh, there you go.

Three-wheeler. And then we've just got a bunch of cars down here, a bunch more. So all our walls and stuff are Porsche colors, and then the ramp to get down is that way I can motion sensor light so anyway I built this to satisfy a need that I felt uh existed in the the market in this area and you know I've been in the gig economy for like fucking 15 years and after a while you go well what is my exit from the gig economy? Eventually, what does that look like? Because, you know, your last video won't make your next

one for you or record your next podcast for you. And so, um, not that there aren't residuals that, you know, there are, but, um, uh, the point is, you know, what, what, what is the exit plan? What do you do? So I figured I could be a landlord for cars. And so we deal with the care and feeding of specialty cars. And we've got beautiful fin tail caddy back there and some interesting old muscle. You've got a cool charger back here, 70 charger, I believe, 69 of 70 charger. Not really sure. You guys still have me? Yeah, we're. 69 of 70 charger. Not really sure. You still have me? Yeah, we're hanging on your word. I'm going to try to...

I'm going to go up this stairwell. I hope I don't lose you. If I do, it's quick. I'll be right back. We're going to go up the back stairs right now. You're here, so... Go back into the main room. You can do it, Internet. I've been switching Wi-Fi access points.

Yeah. There he is. He's back. Yeah, that would be my... Oh, no. Are you there? Yep, yep. We're here. Are you guys there? Unfortunately, I think I'm... I think I don't have the key to this door. I think I'm stuck. I think I'm stuck in this... I'm not stuck in the

stairwell, but I think I have to go back. How did you get so much occupancy so fast? We're dope. We do dope shit. I don't know. We're very fortunate. We've had – we have customers who have – Did you start with lower prices than maybe you'll be in two years? Yeah.

We're priced aggressively. We are priced aggressively. I wanted to be a guy with a full building we were I was a guy with an empty building and then when you're a guy with a full building you're in a much better position to negotiate yeah yeah all right well I can't stand in the stairwell forever so talk amongst yourselves for a second let's get back to somewhere else where I need to be that's really cool it. It's super cool. I find the business really fascinating. I'm trying to thread the needle between overly nosy and, you know, learn about the business. Yeah. Curious. Cause it's neat.

Something that you wouldn't expect really. Yeah. Totally different world to where what I live in. But I mean, if you're rich enough to afford those cars and you just are thinking like, Oh, it'll be nice to just get close to the beach and then just hop in and grab it. So I don't have to or whatever, whatever the concern is. Like I can see that being super, super valuable to someone rich enough that this doesn't even really enter into their bottom line. So, Matt, if I want to drive that car today, what's my, did I lose you?

You stuck. He's in an elevator, I think. I'll ask him when he comes back. Yeah, probably just be a second. There we are. Wait, I'm sorry. I was in an elevator, I think. I'll ask him when he comes back. It'll probably just be a second. There we are. Wait, I'm sorry. I was in the elevator. I was going back up to the studio.

Can you hear me yet? Yep, yep, we have you. Here's me at 17 with my first car. Look at that guy. What's the car? It's a Subaru. Nice. I apologize.

I'm back. You know what's interesting? I was overhearing a little what you said. What's really interesting is, you know, not all the cars are super valuable cars. It doesn't always the cost of the car doesn't always justify spending the money to keep it here. It's really just people want what they want. You know what I mean? They love they love a car and it might be a fairly regular car, but to them, it's more special than other cars and it deserves a little bit of special care. And where I live is a little different from where you guys live, just in terms of how space is used. You know, you hear you can, you're by the beach. So

you get a 3000 square foot house by the beach. It's like a townhouse, like, like a row house kind of thing. No property. Maybe you get a two car garage, probably no driveway. And that could be like three to $5 million. So it's, it's very expensive, but there's not a lot of space even. And so people have money to spend in this part of the world, but what they can't make more of is any space. So if you want to live in this part of town, which is a desirable part of town, and you want to collect cars, there's a pretty big gap in between, okay, I have enough money to collect a couple of cars and okay, I have enough money to buy my own commercial building. So that's kind of the world where we live in. I'm not on my good mic. Let's go in the other office.

Yeah, I'm not going to leave. I'm still, I'm going to make it the whole way. I'm going to drive my Morgan today. What's the process? 15 minutes and you'll have it towards the top. Well, look, oh, if you're talking about cars that are up on Stackers I don't know what I'm talking about

Maybe the other ones I can drive out myself On the stackers you need some amount of lead time You don't need any lead time Wherever your car is you can just show up And we will get it for you Having said that It is to everyone's benefit If you just give us 10 or 15 minutes heads up that

you're coming down, just so we can make sure that either if your car is blocked in by something or on a rack that we can get it down, because it is very easy to get cars down. Or if it's already conveniently located, we clean the glass, make sure your windshield is clean. We check your tire pressures with stuff like that. And it's just, we're able to offer a better level of service if we know people are coming. Having said that, we've organized the cars in such a way that the cars that really go in and out a lot, pretty much live on the ground. And cars that don't go out as much, the less often they go out, the further they go up the racks. And so it would be very rare, even though it only takes like maybe 10 minutes to get a car off the very top, and that's disconnecting all the battery

tenders and everything. It would be very rare that the owner of one of those cars would show up unannounced and determine that they want to drive it and they want to drive it right now. And they're super, you know, even though I tell everybody, I sell everybody just show up, especially like my 10, 10 or so customers that really take their cars out a lot. I'm like, because most of the cars, frankly, they do a lot of sitting, which is fine. It's not a hard job that way. But the cars i say just show up they're always like i'll be by in a half hour and i'm like you don't have to tell me this you can just show up like we're open um but they just out of politeness or whatever like

they do anyway so yeah it's cool it's easy you've got me looking at corvettes over here corvettes are great man there are a lot of car for the money. There's a lot of great aftermarket support. They're a very known quantity in terms of the engineering and whatever. There's not, you know, they're a little, they are more expensive to maintain than Mustangs and Camaros because they share fewer parts with other

cars in the lineup. You know, a lot of Corvette parts, even though it's just the GM, Corvette parts are unique to Corvette. And so, um, in some cases there can be a little more expensive to maintain than you think, but the regular service items and stuff, if you don't break it or crash it or whatever, they're pretty stout. I had a Corvette for 18 years. I liked it. $50,000 buys a lot of Corvette. What can you find? What's right in front of you for $50,000?

This one's actually $46,000. It's a 2017 2LT with like 4,000 miles on it. Can you get into a Grand Sport? A 2017 or 2018 Grand Sport would be like the best car you could buy for $50,000. Because you get the Z06 bodywork and suspension. That's ace. Yeah. What was the one called an lt it's a 2lt just that means uh it's like 1lt and 2lt is like luxury trim so you get like the better leather the better seats like that kind of shit yeah basics yeah it's like

we're in the 60s to get the uh grand are you yeah worth it well priorities too like for me probably not you know like my dumb ass you know what i would value a really good phone integration well they all have good seats that's all the same that's all the same it's better as they're newer in roughly you know yes that's true um i really like nice seats i like vented seats i don't know if corvettes have that maybe not but they do corvette's a car for a fat old man they have air-conditioned seats well some of this is the best vented seats the best vented seats are porsche because they they don't blow they suck that's better Yeah, it is because it sucks the moisture away. And also, it's like a fart vacuum. I can make it back.

Yeah, it's very good. It's a very good system. My truck has vented seats. And I don't think I'll have a car without it again if I can avoid it. It's a nice feature. It's hard to go back. If you're going to go back, then you want to go cloth. You know, cloth?

I still love a cloth, man. I'm all about the cloth. I don't know why cloth isn't more popular it's a really good material for a seat because i'm drinking and it's just like oh well this will never be the same again that's what uh what are they what's the fucking spray not teflon what's the spray scotch brite scotch brite thank you oh i was gonna go with what we sold it as at the dealership. Fucking permaplate. What's that scam name again? Stainfree.

Stainfree. It's $1,595. Yeah. Hank, I had cloth seats in the Tacoma. I have leather seats in my F-150. And I think the cloth ones are easier to maintain for me. The cloth is pretty durable. I mean, unless you literally spill a fucking open bottle of red wine on the thing right i was thinking like you would take like a fruit that is my use case it's coffee but it's got vodka in it it seems like like let's

say for example you drop a french fry between your legs right this is a possible thing and then it gets smeared in all those holes and you have to clean it and they get it's an issue they make a brush for that they have a they have a brush to clean the little perforations in the leather what's it called i'll look up i don't fuck it i don't fucking know i'll send you a brush yeah like a like a yeah perforated leather detailing brush yeah it's it's an actual thing. We have them here at the shop. That's a very satisfying thing to clean those out, though. It's really nice. My friend Larry Casilla has a detailing company,

and he's very successful, and he is like the detailing nerd, and he knows everything about chemicals, and he'll really go deep deep deep on on some of that kind of stuff is it i'm trying to i mean this will be better for discord something like that are we sharing uh there should be a picture in your discord oh oh hang on sorry i need to go i'm not i'm on full screen oh yeah yeah that's pretty much it okay yeah okay basically it looks like a pool table brush kind of yeah like a grooming brush maybe it'll be cool it'll come online shopping is great i mean jeff bezos is apparently not a

great employer but whatever freaking human slavery it takes to get me my upholstery brush and one day i'm in for yes not my problem i feel i'm very conflicted about that piece of shit and amazon's a shitty company but god damn is it convenient none of us had a problem when we ate cheap fruit for the last i don't know entirety of our lives like where do you think that's coming from you think there's a bunch of like well-to-do white guys with button-up collars out in a field somewhere picking them off and hey whether don't ruin my fruit fantasy no organic slave fucking labor you have a chocolate bar you know where that shit comes from like rubber i'll tell you i mean i'll tell you what dude since

you know since 2016 you know in the because i'm from new york and and and i don't you know i don't want to get too much into politics or anything like that but but i i was regularly asking myself you know how we got to here that you know and trying to figure that out because i i clearly was not was not uh taught any of that in my in my jewy private school and so i've been reading a lot of history books and a lot of that kind of stuff and learning about yeah all kinds of slavery man are you familiar with twitter are you familiar with twitch the the gaming streaming thing yeah so i stream on twitch woody's Gamer Tag, for anyone listening. And if you're an Amazon Prime person, you can subscribe to a Twitch guy for free. It is taking Jeff Bezos' money and giving it to me.

It's a Robin Hood thing. It is an act of heroism. So guys, go ahead. Do it now. And do they pay you? The whole point of this thing. Great segue. i'm just curious if someone uses amazon prime to subscribe to your twitch stream for free do you what what's

your what's your cut of that then you get a cut from out of amazon's end normally what happens is you pay five dollars and i get half in the case case of Twitch Prime, I get $2.50. Oh, okay. Yeah. So I get paid about the same. As far as I know, I think this is right. I get paid $2.50. You get paid the same, but it doesn't cost them anything. Outside of what they were already paying for Amazon Prime.

Right, right, right. Yeah. Assuming you're a fucking human, you have Amazon Prime. Right. Everybody does. Yeah. assuming you're a fucking human you have amazon right everybody does yeah are you guys are you guys all the way back up to a full-fledged cable subscription worth of of apps on your fucking smart device i'm glad you brought that up disney plus netflix hulu and espn plus are my

current subscriptions it's yeah kyle you wanted to jump in all right so uh do you have hbo max woody no but i did hear announcement today i think that's where you're headed let me read the announcement from the warner brothers will release its entire 2021 slate of films on hbo max the same day they hit theaters this is going to include dune matrix 4 uh mortal combat godzilla versus king kong the suicide squad tom tom and jerry and many more basically everything that every warner brothers film that hits theaters this year will hit fucking hbo max the same day at no additional cost i love it so hbo max in my head i could be wrong on this but i always viewed it as like one of the other ones, right? You don't get HBO Max unless you already have Netflix and probably Amazon Prime. They divided it.

They divided it with the Go and the Now. They really fucking shot themselves in the foot there. I hear you. It's confusing to me. I don't know how they stack rank, which ones I'm supposed to get, et cetera. And HBO Max, to me, remember your Morgan is a good fourth car hbo max is a good like fifth or sixth streaming service right fifth subscription but now that it's going to have like it's no longer old movies you want to re-watch or something that caught your interest two or three years ago that

you never caught it is now new releases current events in terms of media it bumps it way up the list well they gotta they gotta do it they gotta the it's probably it i bet you the movie houses are subsidizing it you know what i mean because none of the because they're probably not having to pay the theaters you know they don't have to however how do you think how does that ecosystem work wait who pays who there the theater pays them they have to, or however, how do you think, how does that ecosystem work? Wait, who pays who there? The theater pays them. They have to buy the film. So do you think HBO is buying the film from the, from the,

uh, from universal or from Warner brothers? How do you think that works? They're paying, they're paying Warner brothers a huge amount. They must be to get the rights to these films on opening day. And, and it would never have happened if it weren't for COVID because the movie,

you know, the theater industry is suffering so much. Like profits down i don't remember the exact numbers but it was like four billion to 300 million or something so kind of prediction but here's a question though without opening day and i'll let sorry what i'll let you have your prediction time before that without opening day in in a part without an in-person opening day does fucking opening day mean anything nope other than like you can go back to twitter and comment about it like that day or whatever the fuck like it just doesn't who gives a shit if it's opening day if it's streaming at your house i said shit on tuesday who cares i still really prefer going to a theater as soon as i can again i will but this is gonna be

awesome so i've said for a while that like telecommuting that the advances if you call them advances i think a lot of people would are not going to go back they'll have a hard time explaining to taylor that he can't do his job from home sometime in 2022 yeah right they certainly will he's like i haven't right right i think i think he's gonna have a huge go to twitch fuck you long-term effect on commercial real estate right that's not gonna change soon it buying patterns from mom and pop were already shifting to internet but i think that that is not it's going to be durable that's not going to go away this movie theater change that we're seeing do you think that this will be durable is this

hbo max thing going to be the new standard? Or is this just a COVID exception? I don't think we're going back to theaters. I don't think it's ever going to be the way it was. Lots of people like me, and I think even, well, lots of people would prefer to just watch it at home. Like, we have big enough TVs, surround sound systems. Like, I don't lose. I can walk and get an 80 cent soda from my fridge instead of a $6 one. And I'm in the comfort of my home.

I can pause. I can resume. Like there's so many benefits to doing it. If we're going to move up market, I think it's going to become a more luxurious experience with sort of pods, like opera boxes with better seats, table service. Like we have,

that's the theater. The high, yeah. The higher end theaters are doing that. And it's fucking great. I mean, I love it. I think it's awesome. If you compare apples to apples, then the theater is just better.

Because traditionally what I've had to compare the theater to was that like, hey, you can buy the film from like Amazon Prime today or you can go to the theater. And it's like, how much is it? $20. I'm like, fuck fuck i don't want a 20 digital release when i could just like take a girl to a movie and like like it'll be a date

you know it'll be a whole thing it'll be an evening cut the whole popcorn and you know yeah absolutely yeah i mean it's dark in there no need for pretext we'll just pull it out but you know i like the theater i like the gigantic screen i like the crazy rumbling audio i don't like being in the theater with other people unless it's a comedy it's it's fun to watch a comedy with a big group of people who are or a sporting event one time we went and watched a ufc fight live in a movie theater and you know we're all cheering you know and there were some people who are who are not conor mcgregor fans and they were they were watching their guy get his ass beat and it was just like yeah our guy's winning it felt good it felt good it was so great out in the theater that conor

mcgregor fight conor won but he didn't win every second of it so you know different guys had their moments and it added to it eddie alvarez is that there's no it was um the short american wrestler uh oh yeah um i i thought that was eddie alvarez he did steroids he got busted for it and it wasn't eddie alvarez but yeah i like watching comedies with big groups of people because everybody's laughing i'll never forget watching jackass when i was a kid in theaters. Oh, yeah. Everybody's melting down and watching Borat for the first time. Bro, Dumb and Dumber opening weekend when I was a kid. Dumb and Dumber had moments where we were, I think, 94, so I was like 14. I mean, what a great age for Dumb and Dumber.

And we were fucking rolling in the aisles in groups, droops of people. During Dumb and Dumber. I mean, when he fucking. That's exactly how Borat was for me. Ah, I mean, when he fucking exactly how bored I was for me, I think I was like 15 or 15 when that came out and I saw it with my dad and like, it was the, it was the absolute funniest thing I'd ever seen in my life. I agree.

I wore out in a theater really would take it to the next level in terms of what you would get away with. You know, usually like that age, like I'm 14, my dad's obviously an adult. Like I, if we're watching something that I think is hilarious that age, like I'm 14, my dad's obviously an adult. We're watching something that I think is hilarious.

He's like, this is a little fun, a little stupid. If I'm watching something that he thinks is funny, it's like I'm too young. I don't get any of these references. That was a perfect mashup. There was nothing in it that was just like, I'm sure there were references that if I watched again I would get, but it was mostly just like, yeah, I'm going to talk silly and make you look stoop.

This is my man, Keeney. It was Chad Mendes, by the way. Yes, yes. Did you see the new Borat? It was pretty, it was interesting. I didn't see it. It's stunk. I didn't make it all the way through, man.

I didn't like all of the scripted stuff, and I didn't like him in the other costumes. There was a couple of gags with, like, I don't make it all the way through, man. I didn't like all of the scripted stuff, and I didn't like him in the other costumes. There was a couple of gags. I don't know. He's getting his daughter an abortion. Well, what he's trying to do is get a cake topper taken out of his daughter's stomach because she's accidentally eaten it,

but he's calling it a baby, and he's saying that he put it in there, so there's a big confusion between him and the doctor, and it's like, I literally audibly went, ha! And that's as close as I got to laughing at the new Borat movie. I couldn't do it. It didn't feel nearly

as organic. Like, there were situations you could watch in the first one where you're like, either that guy is the best actor of all time, or he has just been surprised by this strange foreigner. Well, see, the first one came along with lawsuits and shit like yeah yeah the first one was real crazy those people a lot of them no one knew who borat was really i mean i i did because i had lithuanian roommates and they were huge into the ali g show and so like they were showing me this shit on their

pc they legally downloaded it i don't know where else you would get it back in 2011 or whatever. That's hilarious. I was watching the Ali G show when it was new in 2001 when I was in college. That was the funniest shit ever. Ali G show was crazy. It was on at the same time as Chappelle's show. It was at the same period. And it was like those two things

were on and both those shows were like, holy shit, this is on television. A lot of the people that were on that are in the first Borat movie things around and both those shows were like holy shit this is on television fucking crazy people a lot of people that were on there that are in the first borat movie were like suing them i think at one point he gets like picked up by like some frat guys and like a motorhome and oh yeah either gets him to talk about some gay stuff or do some gay stuff and like they didn't realize they were about to be in a blockbuster movie yeah like like in a camper van he's like see you guys you play with each other sometimes yeah dude we get naked with jigs all the time but it's but it's like they

edit it to be like yeah we get naked with each other all the time like just like clearly i like the best i liked when he goes what was he singing that like like bastardized national anthem at that Texas rodeo. Rodeo, yeah. Nobody is having it. Even the guy like in the, like the lead up guy is like, I don't know where you're from, but I know I don't like where you're from. That's a good line.

And in fairness, like at that point, like that guy was totally justified because Borat was being an absolute boorish asshole to him. But then he sings Throw the Jew Down the Well, and everybody in that bar in Texas or wherever the fuck is joining in and singing along. In fairness for that one, he was jovial and it was a catchy song. Fair enough. It wouldn't have gone over in New York City.

No, no, probably not. No, that's a middle of the country song. You get too close to the coast and he gets a pushback on that. But yeah, we're at one. I don't need to watch it again. Sorry, I just got interrupted by my shop manager.

That's okay. You've got hundreds of cars to manage. I only have one car. It's alright. They do a lot of sitting. It's all good. So I've got to get out of here in like 10 minutes. Any other ground you wanted to cover?

On the official? I'm happy to fucking wander all over, but if you had anything car-wise that we fucking quickly turned left away from. So you were talking about your exit plan on the gig economy yeah am i to interpret that you don't find your job to be the dream job no no it's not that it's not that at all okay the the you just on an individual video and story basis, you make less money than you think you would. Right? And so, consequentially, I have to generate more content by volume than I would really prefer to be generating.

In order to really, really make a good living. And I'd like to make a really, really good living. And so saying exit from the gig economy doesn't mean I want to stop making videos and writing articles and doing podcasts about cars. It just means that I want to not have to do every single possible story I can find about cars and stuff that might not be so intellectually stimulating and worth doing and be able to focus on some other stuff because I'm secure that I have a regular income that is a little more under my control than, say, YouTube's or whatever. So now you can be more selective with what you do want to do on the YouTube

side and whatnot. Ideally, ideally that's the point, but that's the target, right? Yeah. Yeah. And as a brand new, I mean, look, considering we've only been open for three months, like I am able to travel for, for I have to run the shop a couple of days a week, but I'm able to travel for work for like five days, up to five days at a time. And my GM, you know, what the exception of

a couple phone calls and texts a day, you know, he's got it covered. So So I think we're in good, good position there. So yeah, I mean, I don't want to stop doing any of the things I'm doing. I just don't want to have to rely on those things to pay my mortgage every month you know and so i have this thing about jobs i people i watch this podcast are going to have heard this before but but i haven't so let's go all work is work right if you're an attorney you figure out work sucks in a few weeks all right that bummer but if you're a youtuber if you're a professional basketball player a fighter jet pilot or or whatever it is rock star it might take a couple years to figure out that work sucks you know like and if you're

in that spot congratulations i kind of am inferring that you have learned what so many other youtubers have also learned that it turns out work is work. What was an absolute dream job, I can't believe they're paying me to do this at one time, becomes a have to do at some point. No, look, no, no, no, no. That's not entirely true. I bet it's partially true. Look, when work is done, I never wanted to really be a YouTuber. That wasn't the goal.

I always treated YouTube as a rolling audition for television. I was always kind of waiting for this to get my own television show, and YouTube was always kind of my way to try to do that. It happened. I got some smaller shows, and I've done some stuff, and I'm happy to have done what I've done. But ultimately, YouTube is like McDonald's, you know, and it's about volume. And yeah, you know, there's a certain amount of quality, I suppose, you have to keep people's attention and whatnot. But really, it's not, it's just

about volume, you find a formula, and then you don't divert from that successful formula. If you do, in fact, try to divert from that formula, you will be punished. I came here for that thing you did last week. Do it again. Exactly. I mean, that couldn't be the more accurate quote of the day. I mean, it's perfect for what it is. And so that was never really the goal. It's just where it ended up. And so when I realized, oh, okay, this is a volume game. I played the volume game as hard as I could play it. And yeah, the video is fun. It is driving that car and talking about it. Like that's fun. It is, but there's a lot of work behind it. And I'm not lazy. I work fucking long days.

I work long hours. It's not about laziness. It's just about, it's about just, just keeping up with volume indefinitely. I can't, I can't franchise myself. I can't copy my, I'm not multiplicity. The only, the only, the only thing about. You'reity. The only thing about, let's go back to Total Recall. What's the same thing about every trip you've been on? It's you, there you are.

You know what I mean? And so every video I made, I had to be there for it. So there's only so many times I can expand myself and my day. And so at a certain point, you have to go, I can't chase this volume anymore. I have to find a way to exit the volume strategy and do this at a pace that will generate the kind of content I'm proud of and not just the kind of content that needs to be made because I came up with a rule that says that, and the algorithm says that you really need to have four videos a week and not two or three. My friend went to test pilot school, right?

And this was his, well, he made flight simulators for the Navy and to do that better. They sent him the test pilot school. This was his dream job, right? Everyone has their own target for him. It's like,

Oh my God. One day he wakes up, he flies a helicopter. The next day, a fighter jet, maybe maybe some cessna maybe some uh the is it the osprey that lands vertically with the props like all kinds of cool shit so that he would be you know more open to making better flight simulators cool after a couple months of test pilot school he's like this is work i thought this was going to be fun when we flew that giant white and orange uh coast guard helicopter and i waved to my wife at the house that's what i thought test pilot school was turns out after you stall a plane you have to write a 40 page report on what it's like to stall a plane so that all my flight simulator creation buddies at

the navy replicate it properly yeah it turns out it's like 80 math 10 budget and it sends up like two percent flying you know what i mean work is work but you know like even if it's your version of a bullseye uh some nba player is is doing the 103 point shots in a row and it's work and on top of that if you want to make you know executive money which is you know

business office work like that's not fun that's shitty work but if you want to make that level of salary and earnings doing the fun thing you can't do it by not working as hard and as smart as the people with the suits on. You have to take that approach and that work ethic. And I'm not saying that people should martyr their own health for their job. I don't believe that that's true. I think you should have a quality of life and blah, blah, blah. But it's a fucking

business. And so for me, if I went, okay, what's the best thing about my job? Press cars, access to the people who design and make cars and the interesting people in the industry and sitting around my podcast, talking, talking to my friends about cars. That's the three best. What's the worst part about it? Well, individually, the money per video sucks balls. Okay. But what if I could keep doing this and eliminate this? Well, that would be nice, wouldn't it? So that's where we're at. Now we store cars and I have a studio. And in my studio, I pay rent to myself.

It's quite nice. I recommend it. Yeah. I hope this is a grand slam for you. I know the business is three months old. You're probably still figuring out where you are. We're making some adjustments, but it's pretty cool. If you guys, I mean, once people start traveling again,

next time any of y'all come through LA, by all means, come hang out and we'll have a scotch in the lounge and go up on the man lift and look at cars from the top. It's fucking cool. It sounds cool. It sounds fucking cool. It sounds cool. It sounds super cool. This place looks sick. Thank you guys for having me for these two hours.

I'm sorry I can't continue on. I got to get back and close up the shop, but I enjoyed this one, and let's have it be less than two years until we do another one, yeah? I like it. Yeah, for sure. Let's hit me up soon, and we'll do another one. But you guys have a great night. Thanks for having me.

I'll plug it out real quick. The Smoking Tire Podcast. Get it where you get podcasts. The Smoking Tire Car Reviews on YouTube. The Smoking Tire Podcast channel is on YouTube also. The video version of our podcast from our beautiful new studio. Check out this software we're using. It's called SwitcherCast.

It's real cool. Our whole podcast studio, the board is an iPad Pro, and all the cameras are iPhone 11s. It's so fucking awesome. It is the coolest rig. It's a total broadcast solution that only uses Apple devices. It's my favorite thing ever. It's all wireless. There's no wires in the whole studio. It's a total broadcast solution that only uses Apple devices. It's my favorite thing ever. It's all wireless.

There's no wires, no studio. It's great. All right. I've got a URL up. I'll look into it. Yeah, check into it later. Yeah, that's cool. If you happen to be in L.A., we've got some.

Oh, you know what? You said you wanted to see a cut. I think we lost audio. You're muted now, Matt. Oh, shit. Sorry. You're good. You're good. You're muted now, Matt. Oh, shit. Sorry. You're good. You're good.

You're good. Okay. I just unplugged my mic. If you wanted to see where are any empty spaces, we're up on the third floor outside my office here. So there's some empty spaces on the third and fourth levels. All right. LA people, put your cars in there.

WCCS.com. Westside Collective Car Storage thank you guys so much for your time I really appreciate it have a great night you too that was really neat what a cool area to hang out and work

especially like cars aren't my thing but I can imagine I don't know if I'm into anything as much as he's into cars but i'd love to be around a bunch of magic cards my head goes to the word like what's taylor really into no well people don't really design buildings around cheese it's salt in the meats charcuterie section uh nobody ever hangs out here but i keep it stocked for me I was glad we had him on I like him oh yeah that was really neat

it's a cool transition the way he was talking about to try and get something more stable so he can do his creativity more on his terms which is neat so I was oh actually real quick are you about to do an ad?

Yes, you guys can, well, don't talk about yourselves, but, um, uh, this episode of PKA is brought to you by Postmates.

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coupon. Postmates and SmartMouth, a couple of high T companies. Go check them out. Click on the links. It makes us look good when you do so. Anyway, it sounded like you had something. We talked about it a little bit on PKN, but I know not everybody has access to that for some reason.

Yeah. But we had an awesome, you know, because it's delayed if you're not a patron. All right, all right. I thought I made a mistake or something. Did I not upload it? You thought I was going to be not upload it passive aggressive right in front of your face on the show jesus christ i didn't interpret it like that for some reason i was gotten to it i was like did i do something wrong i had no i was completely unaware okay i'm sorry you wouldn't sandbag you like that on the show no no no that's not what he's talking about um but uh but but we had a great

hangout this weekend we got our fuck show that we have been that has been uh certainly did has been teased now for about a month so uh it was uh it was very interesting one of our um a little awkward i guess but also like like just just fun just funny I was comfortable with it. I think Taylor was weirded out. Taylor looked very uncomfortable during it. It was a little odd at points. I was fascinated. I was fascinated. One of our wonderful $50 patrons brought his girlfriend out,

and she just stripped down completely nude. He threw her in a sex swing, and he broke out the sex toys and went to town on her and then she just hung out nude on camera with us in the chat for she just i remember sitting there she sat there she was just sitting there naked on the bed and like he brought something up to her like you know something like clearly trying to get the the process rolling but she was close to the mic and she's like i'm pregnant i gotta eat and just like it's like oh yeah she's also by the way she's pregnant yeah it's a prego fuck show yeah that's gonna i couldn't tell that she was pregnant there were no so she's recently pregnant yeah that's the best kind um but was it yeah i had a fun time watching like okay so the guy was

using some uh some techniques with a dildo and a and a vibrator like it was like it wasn't an actual hitachi magic wand but it was uh in that class and uh kyle and i were both like yeah that's a technique that's there that's pretty much i'm familiar with that yeah that one's a high success rate and some of the other guys were in the chat were like i haven't used any of these devices before like this is all new territory for there was a little bit of sex ad going on you could tell like not all of our 50 patrons are uh are are suave debonair gentlemen and perhaps they had they were seeing some things for the first time i think maybe my life as much yeah there was some guys had no toys in their sex life at all and it was like yeah uh but it was fun and i so anyway guy having sex knew what he was up to that was not his first time pleasing a woman uh some of the people

watching might have been their first time please they learned some things yeah it was not his first time pleasing a woman. Some of the people watching might have been their first time pleasing a woman. They learned some things. It was not only titillating. It was educational. All right? It was fun. That's what you get from the $50 patron hangout. She was comfortable in her own skin, which I thought was kind of cool.

Right? I might be painting a lot on it, but she sat around as happy as could be. She felt no desire to rush that shirt back on no she was playing peekaboo with her pussy for like two hours yeah just sitting on the bed just ha ha basic instincting over and over yes yes there was a lot of vagine um so yeah if you want to become a $50 patron maybe maybe get to partake in a fuck show. Maybe next time there'll be more camera angles. That might be fun. We're going to work on more camera angles. DMing with

that gentleman earlier. I've sent him $800 for camera gear, some lighting. None of that's true. But yeah, $50 gets you not only into the PKA Discord, where whenever Taylor and me and

Woody are playing games together, you know, we're, we're, we're in there. And, uh, whenever I play games, I play in there. And if I need extra people to like play zombies or vermentite or rust or whatever the hell I, you know, I pull from that group of people and, uh, and yeah, it's a good deal. Have a lot of fun. And every month we do one of these four hour, four hour hangout sessions where we do like two, two hour sessions. But if you're, you know,

if you hang around in the first one and wait for the second one to, to maybe fill up, you can usually slide in for a full four hours and just hang out with us and shoot the shit. It's like a second PKA once a month or a fifth PKA once a month where we're just in there learning what made all these people uh interesting enough to to be a 50 patron and it's really interesting some of these people like some of them they're just like this was my last 50 uh you know it's ramen noodles for me for the month

but i love you guys it's like damn all right fuck you're not good at spending choices are you but then there's some guys who are like yeah you know i started my own company when i was 18 and just kind of took off you've heard of home depot you know like it's always something like that i'm gonna drink 300 of thc liquid right yes there's always rampant drug use uh one of one of the guys, they'll pre-game this thing. That's mostly me. They'll be posting links in our Discord like

this is all the alcohol and marijuana that I am bringing to the hangout to get drunk and stoned. I couldn't find mushrooms but don't worry. Next month I'll have mushrooms and I'm like, oh my god, dude. Starts at 11 a.m central no no no they so for the first show earlier then so we don't we can only do 25 uh patrons in each

show not only does it get a little ridiculous if you got more than 25 but also like that's the group limit on discord so on discord so they line up at 5 a.m. They are in line for seven hours in there pre-gaming, chatting, talking. They don't just click it and leave it. You might be thinking that. You can't because Discord will move you to the AFK room. They're in there for five hours waiting on us to arrive. So I usually wake up about an hour and a half early, take a shower,

and the first thing I do when I get out of bed is I come over here and join the room so that I've got a slot because it's going to fill up. You won't have a slot. I was late to last month's Patreon and, but I stayed for four hours and I, I did a solo show after everybody was gone. There's one guy, Ch choco thunder we always talk basketball and usually after about four minutes kyle's like all right that's enough basketball talk i'm like kyle's not here this is this is gonna be great dirty's like all right that's they're talking in-depth stats and like who's gonna play point guard for the nets this year and i have no one else in my whole life to talk basketball with and he is both really knowledgeable

and forgiving when my knowledge doesn't live up to his and and uh i i like talking basketball with him but it doesn't last and he's a real unicorn in our community because he's African-American, and we need as many African-American fans and patrons as we can garner. If I had black guys to join the hangout, I might get a fifth basketball minute. Or an interracial fuck show, which is the real goal. Yeah, that would be better. Chocolate Thunder's got a white girlfriend. Maybe we can talk him into it. He showed up late.

It was so funny. He showed up late in the second hangout, uh and i was like you missed the fuck show and he's like fuck he was so upset he's like i missed it i missed it and then he's like scanning the boxes and he sees the naked girl in the background he's like fuck damn it why didn't anybody text me this might be a little dangerous to talk about publicly but it turns out the animation we never hit the patreon goal to hit the anime to have to have to deliver on the animation we hit it briefly but it's supposed to stay there and we never received that we should come up with the goal that's better than that one so i don't think

anyone really wants the animation that's a pretty cool like 2014 idea what should we do that people do want like i would love to switch it so that if we ever hit it it's the right goal yeah and just to clarify like the issue is that like because of the way the money like flows into the patreon patreon and like shows the dollar amount like it's the dollar amount that like we're able to cash out at the end of the month that has to hit 15,000. And, uh, and it didn't do that, which is what meeting goals mean. It hit it like in the middle of the month for a day or two or something. It's in the thirteens now, but, uh, yeah. So basically you had like rollover from the previous month that was making it look that way. But, um, first of all, I'll say if people really do want we can do like some sort of

a vote or a poll or something if if if what the amongst the patrons by the way on my twitch chat taylor murca on twitch right that's a good yeah that's where we'll hold it we'll hold it through a paywall over everyone who donates three dollars gets a, no. Free to vote in my chat so we get the best idea. Oh, just post a comment, huh? And subscribe with Amazon Prime. Free. Free. Well, yeah, yeah.

I was in, I mean, we were talking about it on my Twitch. And the consensus amongst those guys, which is a tiny little subset of the people watching the show, was that the animation complaints were really just people enjoying poking at us and that they weren't there wasn't a burning desire to get an animated highlight and it's like yeah i don't care the way yeah right uh i like the idea of having a goal and i also like the idea of something cooler than an animated i'll tell you what i'll do i'll email every patron patron and get them to do a poll about that and uh and because those are the only people whose votes matter because they're the ones who are paying for that's how we should hold elections in general yes yes every dollar

no it would be like letting anyone else vote would be like letting mexicans and canadians vote in our election that's the comparison i'm not letting Mexicans and Canadians vote in our election. That's the comparison. I'm not letting those damn Canucks vote in our election. What if the amount they buy on the Patreon is the amount of votes they get? Your vote will strengthen. You dollar guys, you get one vote. And the $50 get 50 points per vote. That's only fair. It's democracy.

What did you say, Taylor? It's an oligarchy. It's like the most powerful donors make all the decisions of course my vote counts for 5 000 taylor's for 5 000 and woody's for 5 000 i wasn't sure where he was going on that i was i was like we'll see what no no that's a whole different kind of government um so yeah like like uh and maybe i'll ask i'd like to hear what the the wider fan base thinks of course about like what what other good uh goals would be because maybe there's a goal that would convince you to sign up for the patron too if that were a goal perhaps so like like that's not lost upon me but um but yeah you know i'm open to any this could be a bad idea i'm not remotely married to it but would people rather have a dedicated

like pka plays or some amount of them over an animated highlight a month i thought that was already a thing am i wrong you're i don't know you're probably right um it seems like we did a we did that last month we did like a we played left for dead right i need to know our own levels better for sure but but yeah i don't know maybe there's something better than animated my little and if not i can think of funny clips from the show over the years that would be hilarious animated like yeah i don't care and uh of course i'm doing the animation myself with paint. Yeah. Obviously, it's not cheaper that way.

Just so you know, they are $5,000 and is what it's costing for me to do this. So it's not about saving money. It's just taking a loss on animations. It's just about stealing from you all. That's what it's about. Huge high quality, like family guy style animations. We're in the red again god kyle's animation is hired seth mcfarland what were we thinking now we have to pay him residuals on the peter griffin voice why did we hire celebrities to do our voices. I didn't think... That's the dumbest idea ever.

Find someone who can impersonate us. Starring Matthew McConaughey as Matt Woodworth. My name's Woody and I like to do woodwork. Isn't that funny? Doesn't even sound like him. He just passed away in Russia on Fiverr to do Kyle. So many years passed when it was a joke. I was driving a tractor back

before it was cool just squiddling his thumb yeah um but yeah i i i love uh hanging out with those guys in that hangout i actually look forward to like the night before it i'm like hangouts tomorrow hangouts tomorrow we're gonna see some wild shit like somebody's gonna get somebody's gonna go somebody's gonna go unconscious someone will go unconscious from from drinking or smoking or you know we'll hear some wild story there you never know what you're gonna see in the background and you might see a fuck show yeah i'm surprised that actually happened i thought that was all talk after the last couple months the first guy that said he was gonna do do it was all talk. He said I was supposed to understand it was a joke.

He wrote it in text. I'm supposed to get the inflection in text-to-speech's voice that he was only kidding? Yeah, I kicked him right out immediately. No refunds. But then someone else filled that void. You lied to Woody.

You've overstepped. I'm like Mike Pence. You go to jail for void. You lied to Woody. You've overstepped. I'm like Mike Pence. You go to jail for that. You lied to me. You're a bank. You're going to lie to the grand jury as far as I'm concerned. You're done. There are consequences and repercussions for that sort of thing.

But yeah, I'm hoping we get another show next month. You want me to ask that gentleman if we're going to get some more action? I do want you to ask that, yeah. Hey, we're doing the show as I type. It has to be a different woman, though. I just wanted to know. No pressure. No, no, no.

A little pressure. Hey, you're going to be able to deliver again, right? Well, dot, dot, dot. A little pressure hey you're you're gonna be able to deliver again right well dot dot dot a little pressure will we all get a another fuck show next you consider another bit of the call another fuck show so to speak yeah my friends

seem to be able to find mushrooms the kind that get you high reliably for free if this is the case why isn't everyone doing it apparently it's not fun? No idea. I've never looked for those mushrooms.

It is not a fun high. Oh. For some people, it is. It's a different high. Like, you smoke weed, and you're like, ha-ha, let's go watch some Family Guy and eat some fucking bean burritos. You take mushrooms, and it kind of needs to be a guided experience, like acid almost. Like, you might need a sober person around to look after you you can have a bad trip you said it would um magnify your feelings and so i was at um i was doing a paragliding getting towed behind the boat thing and uh he's like yeah what are you

like you know you really like these guys is it i'll just say it's mark and elena they're the people that are going to do van life after army and uh and i think really highly of them anyway he's like if you were to do mushrooms around them you guys would all be like so cool you guys would have like you've got positive vibes anyway the vibes would get much more positive that's how he described a mushroom high maybe that's wrong uh when i took mushrooms the first time we went to the park i had a good time i felt a little bit of uh what's the word um just sort of giddy happiness i suppose okay um just kind of it was very pleasant but it wasn't an overpowering kind of thing i don't think i took enough i did notice the colors of uh especially the greens

were just popping like they were almost colors too popping yeah it was a bright sunny day and we were in a park obviously you know with trees and lots of grass but the grass in particular the way the sun was reflecting off of it it almost seemed like the grass itself was emitting light like it was like the grass was like a neon light source almost like like just to a small extent but a noticeable extent were you running around or were you just like sitting looking we were just walking through the park you know walking by a lake and uh eating some ducks a lady friend is that yeah okay yeah i only had like an eighth of an ounce so we like i don't know if

we split an eighth but um or maybe like we did a trial run first and then we split it again so we like i don't know if we split an eighth but um or maybe like we did a trial run first and then we split it again so we each got ended up getting like a 30 second of an ounce in any case it wasn't enough um and then the second time was like a couple years later with a different girl and that's the story i've told before about passing out in walmart and like having a whole complete meltdown like basically a panic attack that led to unconsciousness and falling face first into a rack of sunglasses i know less about drugs than anyone but it seems like if you're new to a drug it's smart to have a tour guide you know like that's even true with alcohol you might not know like if you If you somehow had no information about alcohol, you might want to know, like, oh, yeah, for a guy your size who doesn't drink, three beers is probably where you should stop.

After that, the fun gets bad. And then from there, you can make a more educated decision next time you drink. Maybe. I don't know. A tour guide. Something like alcohol is way more like tick, tick tick like ticking up whereas shrooms is gonna like hit you more so like more suddenly you know like like if you're like what do you let's say you're sipping a bud light you finish that bud light you start the second one the middle of

the second one you're like oh i kind of feel that first one after the second one like you're really inching that that feeling up whereas if you're taking lsd or shrooms it's like oh fuck i took way too much time to consume if alcohol if you could drink nine uh cans of beer as easily as you could eating a gummy bear then you could drink too much yeah it's true you can still drink too much like that i guess all drugs and drinking stuff all has to do like how much you ate it's just alcohol is harder to drink than these other things there's like a natural inhibitor either the volume of it or the taste of it

or something so he replied he's like yeah I think we can arrange something and then he sent me a picture of his girlfriend's tits what a cool guy he's just pulling her shirt up. I'm pretty sure he just took that picture.

We got called for an encore, hon. It's an honor. Talking about acid and shrooms made me think of this movie I watched very recently. Have you ever heard of a movie called Dead Man's Shoes? No. In 2004. It was some bullshit like recommended for you in the Amazon section, just on Amazon Prime. And, you know, wedged between a couple other shitty movies.

And it was one of those things where it's like, okay, whatever. That's pulling me in a little bit. Description is like, man with retarded brother seeks revenge on those who bullied him when he returns from the army and it's like this seems a little dumb but that's an interesting premise I'm in and so I start it and I'm kind of like doing something else not really paying that much attention

within like 10 minutes I'm pretty hooked on this first of all something about this movie is like you know how usually movies are edited in a way that you can tell when there's a flashback because of context and flow. They must have realized either in the editing or at the end that the, the flashbacks are so jumpy and disjointed in this movie that they have to put

like that old timey filter of like crackling screen and, and black and white on every single flashback throughout the whole movie to like cement home. Because if they genuinely, if they didn't do that in this movie, I was was i would be totally lost to be like watching the witcher yeah they don't pace it very well but basically i was like oh basically this guy's gonna come back and get revenge on some guys who like called his his slow brother some mean names no it shows like flashbacks so basically he leaves this this handicap mentally handicapped brother of his

doesn't have anywhere to go so he starts hanging out with these like no good nicks these no good nicks in fucking manchester wherever the fuck they were in england and it shows the flashbacks and i'm imagining them like throwing beans at him or something being like ha ha ha you can't read or something it's one of the guys corners him in the kitchen and is like what the fuck do you think you're doing here you're a fucking retard you're a fuck screaming this in the guy and is like, what the fuck do you think you're doing here? You're a fucking retard. You're a fuck screaming this in the guy's face as he's doing it. And he says, and this is one of my favorite lines in the movie.

I know you'll like this. Kyle is he gets in the, the retarded guy's face and he goes, you can either get on your knees and suck my cock. He's saying this to a retarded guy in the kitchen. He was like, he's scared. And he goes, or you can opt for the special surprise.

And he goes, special surprise. And looking like the heaviest, fastest punch, he hits this handicapped guy and drops him like a sack and then starts kicking him. And it's like, OK, this is a real level of terrorism that I wasn't expecting when the title of the card said bully. I thought like we put glue on his chair while you were in the army. No, they're like screaming, calling him a retard, beating the shit out of him. Then the brother gets back and like from the army and he like immediately makes it his mission like i'm gonna get revenge on like these five guys who did this and so he goes around like in a gas mask and within at no point in the movie is the brother at all on even footing with these bullies he's like

a spetsnaz level operator these guys who are bullying him like at one point when they realized they might have to kill someone they're like oh that's fucking deep bruv fucking kill some fuck he's coming for us any like they were like panicking and he he comes to their place of you know you know drug house or whatever they're like low-level losers and he breaks in and like this is like the first eight minutes and it shows him in the gas mask standing over two of them with a hammer in his hand and then like a bunch of makeup and then like the next scene you see all the guys wake up with like makeup all over their faces like an actual prank the guys who like were kicking his brother and calling him a retard and they're like oh my god like he was in here he could have killed us if he wanted to and so they like all in like a

little british car drive to where this guy met because they're like it must be that retarded guy's older brother he's so fucking scary why'd we pick on him and they go there and it's like five of them surrounding this guy and he's and they're like yo we know it was you and he's like i could have killed you last night i'm going to kill all of you stop me you know like oh you know we're sorry about this you know he's like i'm gonna kill every single one of you and then he just leaves just fucking leaves and then uh uh it shows another flashback of like how they they terrorized this this kid so like to initiate him into the gang he goes up to this woman and they're like drug house this is while the the other son was still in uh the other brother rather

was still in the army and the mean man is like hey bitch you go in there and you fuck that dimwitted motherfucker she's like i don't want to fuck him he's weird i don't want to and he's he starts beating the shit out of her be like i'll fucking kill you if you don't get in there and fuck that guy what are you gonna do what are you gonna do now she's like i'm gonna go in there and i'm gonna fuck that guy then she goes in there and she's like knowing that other guy's gonna kill her she's like trying to jack him off but he's just laying in the bed going what are you doing what are you doing like not not fully liking it it's way more brutal of a movie than i thought

it was going to be but then he starts really letting them have it he starts he starts killing him blows a guy's head off uh the the gangsters stalked him down to his house and then brought i guess one bullet for their rifle and like as he came out because like you know it's england so like they don't really have shit and so they're like in their car like 100 yards away the dude comes out with an axe for some reason one of their own guys runs over to talk to him and they accidentally cap their own guy in the head rifle and they kill him and then their concern is oh bruv we just fucking killed johnny there on this fucking porch he's gonna call the police on us. He's not going to call the fucking police

on us. He's going to fucking murder us. They go back and it shows the final thing. And as he's murdering all of them, little other flashbacks, but it gets to the core of the bullying that shows the reason that was revealed now

that his brother killed himself this whole time you were just seeing uh like i guess a ghost like a six cents version of the the handyman we had to get brother standing watching him do this but it was really a ghost his just memory and so the what happened the big thing is this group of guys they kidnapped him like right after the the brother apparently went the military. So they must have been waiting. They kidnapped him. They forced him to take acid. They like held his head open and were like feeding him acid.

He's like, oh, oh, oh. They keep doing it. It's brutal. And they take him to a farm and they're like leading him around an abandoned farm. They take a rope, put it around his neck, and they're leading him like an animal. And he's tripping on acid. Isn't this a real movie? I would just,

I just watched it. And then they get into the, this like burnt out cobblestone building and like this little hole in the wall from the inside and the outside. And they like pull him in there. They force his head into the little hole and they pull the rope through the other side. They're like, you're going to stay right the fuck here.

You're going to stay right the fuck here. You're not going to come. And then they all run away as if they've pulled a prank and then they just leave this handicapped man in the middle of the this abandoned farm and he kills himself and that's the reason that the brother came back from the military with five axes to grind uh and he killed all those guys except for the last guy who he brought to the same place his brother killed himself and then he forced the other guy to kill him instead because he's like i just realized killing is awesome and i'm gonna keep doing it

all the time if you let me live and so he forces this other guy and the other guy's like was the one of the group who like just his biggest crime was not stopping it like even in the he's like you know this is fucking and he was and this guy's like i don't want to i don't want to kill you he's like fucking kill me just fucking screaming bullying this man and just stabbing him to death and then he bleeds out and that's the end of the film uh it was uh i'd give it a seven out of ten it kept me engaged the whole time yeah even if what he went to get a pin pad to write down the title so that he can watch it later i think that's why he walked away i think that's why i think he was so interested in dead man's shoes the 2004 film which was in the recommended for me section at amazon that is telling that's the best part about that whole awful thing you just said.

In the little placard thing, it said bullying. That is not bullying. That is 10 levels above bullying. If you see bullying in there, you think it's going to be schoolyard pranks and silliness. And the revenge is going to be that we spook him harder than he's ever been spooked before. Gosh darn it. We're not cutting people's fingers off and forcing handy people to hang themselves so anyway i thought that was an interesting interesting movie uh sounds awful sounds awful you're not gonna give it a watch no no i don't think that one's for me that that like i was getting getting uncomfortable listening to you describing it. I was just like, oh.

And then they raped him. Oh, okay. Oh, and they wanted him to suck his dick. But they just beat him terribly instead. I guess that's better. Yeah, because he opted for the surprise. He opted for the surprise. Yeah, he opted for the surprise, which was just...

Well, I guess it's kind of his fault then, huh? This guy, almost as if he knew he was about to hit a slow person, yeah for the surprise which was well i guess it's kind of his fault then huh he tell this guy almost as if he know he was about to hit a slow person telegraphed like elbow to ankle just like full like half crescent just a waning gibbous punch that's how much of a there was over the top. Jesus Christ. Yeah. It was way more brutal than I thought. I thought it was going to be a silly little tale. Watch the whole thing, though. Watch the whole thing.

Well, I needed to know how it was going to end. In for a penny, in for a pound. In for a penny, in for a pound. And then at the end when I found out that the retarded brother was dead the whole time, it was like, oh, well, this really is the original. Spoiler alert for all of you film aficionados who are just about to load this one up.

No, I said that in the story. But 16, 16 years ago, they could have watched this. Well, let's see how it did on Rotten Tomatoes. 58. Not bad. It's actually not bad for a movie about avenging a bullied, retarded person. Yeah. bad for a movie about avenging a bullied retarded person yeah and like they did the kind of like acting of a of a handicapped person where like it was just like a guy whose eyes dart around a lot

and and doesn't and just puts his teeth on top of his lip like there wasn't a lot of there was no one flew over the cuckoo's nest level acting here. It was just like, all right, we need you to bite your lip and look around like you're kooky. He's like, all right. That was about the level of it. But I don't know. It was it was the little revenge parts where he killed the bullies. That was nice, you know.

But then when he dies at the end, you guess. Well, they certainly deserved it because, oh, that's the way he killed three of the bullies, too, is he they were all like looking for him because they were all there's like these like three stooges of guys were looking for him in their own house. Like he's probably already here. And they're like looking around and they can't find him. And it shows him in their kitchen pouring an enormous amount of LSD into their tea. And then the three bad guys drink the tea, and then they're all tripping balls, and he just goes around. And one of them, he just fucking executes.

Another one stabs him to death. That part was good. Because those were the ones that deserved it. They were the ones that threatened the guy to suck his dick and forced a retarded man to take many, many tabs of acid before abandoning him at a farm. Jesus. Yeah.

It wasn't uplifting. No? No. No, there wasn't a second part to that sentence either. Fair enough. I left the inflection there and then I realized

there was nothing positive to say. Yep, there was nowhere to fall back. Yeah. No. What have you been playing game-wise? Have you been play anything different uh i've popped back into magic the gathering arena a little bit and it's been so fucking

long since i've played that that like standard has changed two or three times and so basically now i took the deck that i had built a year ago at this point and i tried to jump into like a standard match with it and they're like nope nope, nope, you gotta go change everything. And so I'm trying to build up a backlog of cards now. I'm sticking all the green so I can really focus in on that and get as many cards and really focus the build on that so I can get more competitive with it faster. But even with the shitty decks, I'm winning most of my matches. Part of that is I'm winning the over-fucking-whelming majority of my matches

because I'm still like in bronze tier four playing against like some people who don't even know how to play it because i'm just starting in the stacked or ranked or whatever again but yeah i've been getting really into that i'll probably stream some of that in the next couple days i've been real busy with uh with stuff this this past few days so i haven't been able to but yeah that's the one i'm jumping into i want to do uh more zombies that'll be fun i haven't done zombies in like a week i want to do so i'm gonna play some of that tomorrow night if you're down to stream it of course yeah i play every day um i've been unlocking diamond weapons i got all my shotguns diamond i got the knife diamond i got the grenade launcher diamond but you finally got the grenade launcher i that was the first thing i got taken care of oh maybe i was required yeah the shot the shotguns i've

been working on this week uh but now that i've seen the diamond camo oh it's so shitty it looks awful the thing is just to show you have it or are you gonna back back it down to a cool looking one i'm gonna change it to something else it's too ugly like i don't even like looking at it's like pink rhinestones all over your gun and it's not even like a pink that looks natural it's just like this glowy pink that looks like shit the thing is if you unlock diamond on every weapon in the game then you get like some sort of uh like a like camo that moves it looks like i don't know like black murkiness moving around they've had those before yeah so i'm i don't know if i'm gonna try to get that or not i'm yeah i'm watching a clip of the diamond ammo right now this really just isn't that cool

it's it's hideous it's not worth having so is the gold like the gold for just completing all the challenges on one weapon that's bullshit you get diamond for completing all the challenges on one weapon. That's bullshit. You get diamond for completing all the challenges on every weapon in a category. And it's shit. So like, I don't like any of the camos. I don't know why they made them so shitty like that. But I am enjoying zombies. All your meaningful stuff has been upgraded all the way for a while, right? Like the perks, the...

Oh, yeah. Yeah, I've spent all the Ethereum crystals that I can. And now you just don't earn any more Ethereum crystals. I'm looking forward to them dropping the new perks. And I think they're going to tinker with adding some new Easter eggs into the game. But it's going to be, like I said, like February or January at least before we get a new map. Are they adding those new perks into this existing map? Will they be added in the new map?

That's my understanding. And nothing is like super confirmed by treyarch just um from i watch a lot of zombies uh videos on youtube and uh that's the that's the that's what they think is going to happen that they're going to release those four perks and a few other things onto this map. Or maybe at the beginning of Season 1, whenever that is. And then Season 2 will be the Vietnam Firebase map, which sucks we have to wait that long because I'm already getting tired of this map.

I've played so much. Oh, you must be exhausted. You've put hundreds of hours in. I don't know how many hours. A hundred hours, then. I don't know. I don't know if Battle.net has a timer, but it's a lot.

That's what those video game companies are shooting themselves in the foot when they put those timers in there. You think so? Oh, yeah. People don't want to see that they could have been a concert pianist in the amount of time that they've played League of Legends. That's how I am with Civilization V. I've got like 2,500 hours.

That's how I am with Civilization V. I've got like 2,500 hours. That's insane. You could probably be fluent in another language. I absolutely could be fluent in another language. But why bother? You've conquered the world hundreds of times. So many times and so many different ways. You forced them to adopt your language. My language, my

religion, everything. My customs. Do you even play that game anymore? Ever? Can you remember the last time? I don't remember the last time I played, but I will play it again sometime. I'll play Lek Mod, and I'll get three or four people, and we'll play a multiplayer match probably this year,

or next year. I was never nearly as into Civ as you, but I did get into Civ 5 a few years ago when you were teaching me how to play it and a few things, and then Civ 6 came out, which I think you were really excited for, and within three play sessions

I was like, this is objectively a worse game. It's clunky, it's shitty, the aesthetics of it are weird and bad and cartoonish and blocky, which I don't like, and so I think I would just jump back to 5. Yeah, I'm not going gonna play six ever again uh but i will play five again uh like i'll mod it and i'll play it and it'll be great um what was the other game i was thinking of um oh we've been playing jeopardy yes you've been saying are you still eight and one i'm not i lost a couple last

night oh to who who was the class class is really the only other one who wins. He's a smart guy, and he got real lucky at one point. One of the categories is European geography, and I'm just like, no, fuck, that's not fair. He ran the category in Double Jeopardy. He knew every question. He ran the category. He ran the category just like, boop, boop, boop, just every time, just instant answers. instant are there a couple ones for you where

it's like you u.s states uh there will be like american history american geography uh so he doesn't know that shit and i know that shit very well anything that's religious i usually like come close to running the category uh pop movie and tv that's all gonna be me uh almost every single time i get all of those uh we had one uh category last night was on youtube and that was one of the jeopardy categories so we did pretty well at that yeah you know but sometimes it's really hard yeah class is the other one you don't hear me you should be able to hear me uh in that moment i lost a little bit yeah kyle's nemesis at jeopardy yeah it's been very fun i like jeopardy i like code names i like those uh competitive uh i don't know intellectual type games have you played the the decoding one where you try to undo a bomb like i will give you clues and you'll perhaps

to a bomb like i will give you clues and you'll perhaps we've looked at before it looks so frustrating i've played it before but it looked like it was going to be too much to get into and way too much to be good at like like i can all right we'll get the bomb stopped but we're never gonna be good at this unless we have a notepad in real life next to us and like you're flipping through pages guiding me through stuff and that just didn't seem fun to me. Maybe in VR but still I think it needs to be frustrating. I like trivia a lot. This is the one where I'm like

you know describe the wires to me and you're like oh there's a red a blue and it's something and then I tell you the like which one to clip. Yeah. It makes for some compelling videos. To that. For video content I can see how that would be funny. We. It makes some compelling videos to that. Oh, but for video content,

I can see how that would be funny. We'd be like, no, you stupid fuck that. Yeah. And man, each other, the other red wire that's magenta.

No, they're just, I've seen some videos that people are very good at. They're very competent. And you're like, how are they doing this? It's a, it's good stuff,

but probably takes a while to get to that level. Yeah. I'm not interested in that so much. I've played it before. I think I've beaten it before, but I didn't like it. Woody, I saw how interested, just a reminder, that movie I was describing, that really good sounding one was called Dead Man's Shoes. Yeah, I probably won't be

checking that out. Such a stupid fucking movie i swear amazon's recommended for you section just means you know whatever people aren't watching please watch this like please get the metrics up on this trash content did you guys watch the liberator what's that uh it's sort of animated it looks like they took real life actors and used cell shading uh it takes place in world war ii and there are these guys who kind of watch um i guess they were smuggling jewish people out of germany and uh you know they they basically go to a haunt oh fuck I'm completing my things.

This guy is a good... I mixed up two stories. The Liberator is a guy who goes and takes a bunch of soldiers from jail. They were in their J company. And he gives them a sense of purpose and they fight and it's pretty cool. I like it. There was times

when I was like, this is like an animated Band of Brothers. Maybe a notch below that but i enjoyed it a bunch of brothers is still a really good show like maybe what is this on netflix netflix yeah kyle you didn't see it i watched all of it i have not seen it um but i'm looking at the the the look of it right now it's kind of cool yeah i think it's pretty good the other one i talked about is not as good it's like a horror war movie but this one is pretty good um they use rotoscoping anyway uh the animated part i almost wish it wasn't but uh it has its own look and i got involved with the characters and it was pretty cool the animation style distract you or something it looks like borderlands almost the the video game i think it's cell shading and uh yeah it's like real people real actors real jeeps and stuff but then they like paint over them and it's like a little distracting painting them over them uh in post and i'm pretty sure in filming

you know they would like maybe you've seen like knuckles have creases that are just exaggerated and stuff i'm like i that guy probably looked ridiculous during filming because he has lines on his nose and accenting his ears and stuff but after the cell shading it looked less ridiculous but the liberator is a pretty good watch it's it's like a but the liberator is a pretty good watch it's it's like a it's like a more realistic archer kind of animation yeah what i what i did watch and love was the new episode of the mandalorian that was the best episode in a very long time it was the the title of the episode is the jedi and uh we get to see uh ahsoka uh played by rosario dawson uh she did a great job um and uh the lightsaber stuff was cool all of her combat was cool the whole episode was great we got a bunch of backstory we finally

learned what baby yoda's name is what his backstory is grogu did you know his name was leaked like a year ago i didn't i don't read into i don't read leaks and stuff if you had me make up a star wars character's name it would be better than grogu uh kyle the jedi that we met can you say her name again it's a hard one ahsoka ahsoka is that foam hat she's wearing supposed to be a foam hat are those like head arms what is that obviously a foam hat thing she's wearing that's her hair that's it's hair so you could cut it and it wouldn't hurt her that's my understanding but i haven't delved too deeply into it i thought she was an alien species that has hand hair or something she is she she lives to like 250 years or something like that and she's like 40

there no this if you cut this shit off it would bleed that's something that's a good yeah that's maybe the phrasing that i needed if you cut yeah are you looking at the animated version or the or the no no i made sure to put in the the mandalorian it's uh and it's rosaria dawson like it it looks more like slugs like they'd be squishy slugs than like tight hair it looked can she move can do they kind of like move around on her like their tentacles i never noticed i'm moving it is so obviously a foam hat from a low budget prop department this looks like you could buy it off Amazon for $4.99 as a Halloween costume. Oh, wait a minute.

That's a headdress I'm reading here. A headdress? Like, here's the picture I'm looking at. That's... Yeah, see, it's got wrinkles in it. Right? That is so clearly a low-budget foam hat. Oh my god.

Yeah, that's like Halloween store. Look, I guess I don't know what it is. I guess I don't know what it is. Well, I can tell you what it is. It's a low-budget foam hat. It's clearly what it is. I wonder, did someone paint it in prop department?

You know what? Maybe they painted it, sat on it by accident, got it all wrinkled up, and were like, fuck, well, I'm not going to paint another one. I think it's supposed to have those creases. It's like the inside of your elbow when you bend it, you know?

Wait, but it is not hair. It is a headdress. it's like the inside of your elbow when you, when you bend it, you know, wait, but it is, it is not hair. It is a headdress. Now I'm, now I'm not sure. I think that the thing she has on over it is, is a headdress of some kind,

but that is some sort of like flesh. Yeah. See, if you like, if you stabbed her in one of those, she would notice. Yeah. Like some sort of fleshy material.

It's irrelevant. She's got weird head. Um, it was a great episode. We got to see a Jedi. We got, uh, we got,

uh, Michael Bean was in the episode. He was Michael. He's one of my favorite actors. He Terminator, uh, aliens, uh,

and tombstone three of my favorite movies of all time. He was in them and he plays the mercenary. It was one of the better episodes. Lots of backstory, some fun Baby Yoda shit, and we got to see Ahsoka played by, I don't know, the perfect actress to play her. I'm a big fan of Rosario Dawson

anyway, and she did a good job. I liked the lightsaber fight with that chick who had the staff. It was a good job. I liked the lightsaber fight with that chick who had the staff. It was a good episode. Are you still watching through it, Woody, or are you checked out? Actually, I guess I'm current. I've seen this episode on The Mandalorian.

Okay. I liked it. I think Kyle enjoys it more than I do, but it's all, it's weird. I am simultaneously saying, you know, one of the better things going on right now and not that good, which seemed like they'd conflict with each other, but that's where my head is. I don't know.

Somehow I find, I anticipate it and then I watch it and it's a letdown every time. And I do that every week. Maybe you just got to set your sights lower, right? This is blamed about other people just got to set your sights lower. Right? I have complained about other people doing this to Star Wars for five years now. Like, that was a good movie. You just expected it to be a cultural icon for the next 30 years.

And that's too much hype. I watch Mandalorian. It's a good show. It's just not, you know, our worst level. Good. Yeah. To me, I think it's some of the best star wars content that's ever been made uh the special effects are so fucking good they're

as good as the movies when they have like space stuff and like especially like three episodes ago when they were uh flying their ship down on that ice planet and going through crevasses that looked great uh maybe i only take notice of the things I think are, I might just be looking at it through a negative lens, which I hate when people do, but here I am. And, and every time like,

okay, star Wars, I'm sorry, start Trek next generation. Every time the ship is getting hit, the people just shake and then they shake the camera and it looks like the low budget special effects. It is every time i see that in mandalorian i'm like what the fuck is who thought this was good enough what the what the

hell is i expect them to actually build a spacecraft first i look at baby yoda everybody thinks baby yoda is the coolest thing i'm like it's a doll right everyone else can see this is a very fake looking doll uh but no that's that's not baby yoda that's goo goo the baby yoda looks low budget to me i'm like i bet in person he's wild it's not CGI. Absolutely. What do you think? Somebody's operating a puppet?

No, it's a reanimated Verne Troyer. I think it's a little bit of both. I think there's like a, there's a doll there of some kind, but I think there's CGI and it's little, little peepers and its face. I'm Googling it. Um,

I think you're right about it being a mix. At least the first thing I'm Googling it. Um, I think you're right about it being a mix. At least the first thing I'm finding, I expected them to breed an actual tiny green alien for my star Wars films. I, I guess I expect it to be at the level of like whatever it was, 2003 avatar, you know, like that level of animation and CGIgi and work i have this feeling

they could pull off in 2020 for the mandalorian instead i'm getting alf the tv show alf you are not comparing the fucking baby yoda to al well i mean it's funnier I don't think you remember what ALF looked like Yeah That's my reaction to you comparing Baby Yoda to ALF Wow Look at that alien

ALF is at least as good as Baby Yoda Honestly though Kyle if you scrolled up from ALF and you saw that headdress and the face paint you might think that's from the same program that she's talking to alf like uh the the clarinet player at that kooky bar that they go to look you could throw you totally throw alf into the background of a star wars episode i will not debate that they had an ant man that they communicated with a couple episodes ago and he was literally a gigantic ant.

I don't mind that. Yeah, I mean, also the... I mean, even the Baby Yoda Gip you just showed looks a little Gremlins-y. Right? They're remaking

Gremlins. Or no, they're making a sequel. They're making a sequel that's the uh they're making a sequel to gremlins yeah gremlins 3 dude this baby it's all in camera no cgi i guess if i'm being honest what he has a little more eye movement and stuff than alf did but i still every time i see baby Yoda, he looks super fake to me. Yeah. What do you mean? You've never seen gremlins?

No, I said, I've only seen the first one. Okay. Well, that's the only one real travesty. And I was going to say like gremlins. I think my girlfriend convinced me to watch that like this past Halloween season. And I was like,

I've always scrolled past this. It looks so stupid. It's a Christmas movie. It's actually Christmas. I guess it was longer than I thought thought and i actually thought it was pretty good so i'm old when i saw gremlins we saw in the theater when it was like a current event not some historical movie and uh no ever all the advertising around gremlins was it was going to be a movie about adorable little things

like it was supposed to be funny they they like they took the funniest moments the little it looked like it was a movie about baby yodas and if you've never seen gremlins these little baby yodas turn evil inside the first 15 minutes or so and then the well am i a little am i going fast on this well you well you've got one so i can't i can't remember what they're called all but one goes evil well no like or something no so no they fed him after midnight so you've got this little critter that looks a bit like a furry baby yoda and i can't remember what those are called they're like some magui that's it and uh and you get this for a pet and they're like but don't feed it after midnight don't get it wet and when you do all that's what creates gremlins they like pop off of him and become gremlins like like like but then the gremlins are evil. Little eggs pop off.

Yeah. And the gremlins are evil and reptilian looking rather than the mammalial magui who is like a friendly, nice, little, cute fucker. I haven't seen it. I thought one made him evil and one made him multiply. But I might be off on that. I thought, was there ever a stage in the movie

where there were a bunch of non-evil ones? No. It's been too long. Yeah, it's literally like 30 years ago. But all the advertising for it was about, I guess, the Magwai. So we thought it was going to be a happy, funny movie. And you know, when you first saw Baby Yoda, he's like, ooh, and his ears perk up.

And you're like, I love this this thing that's what we were expecting and then all but 15 minutes of it are about evil lizard things killing and destroying and you're meeting horrific ends right because like as they're people are killing the the gremlins with all sorts of household items like i'm pretty sure one goes in a blender and he's just like no no no and there's like just like chop him into bits when it's microwaved yeah yeah yeah when it's microwaved for sure do you remember when they uh the way like and the the gremlins would creatively kill people too the scene when they like that that old lady is in that like assist ride up the the stairs chair that stairs chair apparently this one had like an 11 setting and they turn it all the way up and she's going like screaming up the stairs and then she flies

through the front of the front of the building uh yeah it's a good movie i mean i i i was i went into it with the only knowledge being like this looks looks retarded. There's no way it's going to be good. And so that's why I was surprised. That is a good way to approach a show. It's the opposite of what I do to the poor Mandalorian, where every week I'm like, well, that's not the best thing I've ever seen. I mean, I think they set your expectations high

because you liked the first season a lot more than this one, right? I think that's true. Well, better yet, I think I started the first season with a really positive outlook, expecting it to be great. And by the end of it, I was like, you know, these seem like we're not advancing the overall plot very much. It's 90% this week. We either got lost or our ship broke or, you know or we have to get out of this place every week. And a couple episodes,

maybe five episodes in, I'm like, you know, this seems kind of formulaic. And I would say they're still kind of formulaic. For sure. I mean, that's what the show's going to be. Because in a universe where you have light speed, I don't know, faster than light travel,

the goal seemed to be to get Yoda to his people. I don't know what the goal is now anymore, because that changed in the last episode. But if everything just worked, and you knew where stuff was, you'd just be like, all right, we're going to take him home. Boom! All right, we're there. Here you go. And that's the end.'s like like how it should have ended could make a 30 second episode there never seems to be any trouble while they're traveling at light speed you know ships don't interact with each other at light speed they just sort of you know zip there so he goes from town to town to town trying to figure out where

the jedi are so he can get yoda there specifically i guess yeah they're about if you don't if you don't like the mandalorian there's got about to be a whole bunch of other content that you also want like from uh disney plus because i'm hopeful you're gonna get i'm hopeful they're gonna make they're they're gonna make an ahsoka spinoff for sure they're gonna make they give her a spinoff they'll make a fucking uh is that a prediction or is this something you know no they're saying they're They're going to make a... A spin-off? The foam hair lady? She's big in Clone Wars.

Yeah, she's a lot. She's the most popular Star Wars character that's alive in that universe right now and is current. I don't know. Luke Skywalker is right in there. He's somewhere. Young Luke Skywalker is somewhere in the Mandalorian universe just chilling somewhere

uh but i don't think there'll be yeah i think i didn't have the time period right so what's john he's dead luke just killed him well actually he killed himself uh the emperor killed darth vader spoiler alert that's literally from like 1982. Return of the Jedi. Spoiler there. Sorry about that. Or is it Empire? In any case, yeah, it's the end of the original trilogy's third movie. We're right after that.

The Empire has fallen. The pieces are being picked up. The Death Star is gone. The second Death Star is gone. The second Death Star is gone. And Luke Skywalker is out there with Leia and Chewbacca and all those people somewhere. But they'll probably not make an appearance. Well, Mark Hamill's almost 60. And I'm sure he's upset about how they handled his character in the last movie he was in. character in the last movie he was in.

The only thing I remember was you guys telling me that he sucked on some bear's nipple for sustenance or something. Yeah, he drank the milk out of some space bear. Were they penguins? I don't know. It seemed like he was farming space penguins and also drinking some sort of

a blue milk substance at one point. I don't even want to talk about it. I'm as upset with that as i i'm almost as upset with how they handled mark hamill's luke skywalker character as i am with what they did with game of thrones how did you want them to handle it what should luke have been doing other than farming penguin mill i mean he's like the most badass character in star wars history like maybe he was tired of living in the gig economy and he wanted something a little more predictable i always thought mark hamill was a little bit

me me me in his criticism of this thing he's like man i'm down and out on this island a better story would have been this hear me out hear me out i come with quadruple lightsabers in my hands and i take on the entire empire by myself blocking lasers and new jitsu fucking kung fu flips as i go off knock out the death star with my bare hands and wouldn't have been great if i was the hero in the next three stories too what if they cgi'd me younger or older who a fuck? I could have been the hero of all heroes that this universe has ever seen. They had me as a non-star. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, my God. You should bring him back in the next one. And they're like, he's such a powerful Jedi. He need not even move to fight. He's like 55 pounds overweight for the first two films. You know, he didn't put on that weight for the character. No, he did lose it, I think, in the last one. He wasn't in the first two films you know he didn't put on that weight for the for the character you know no he did lose it i think in the last he wasn't in the first two he was in the last three minutes of the uh of of the first movie and then he's in the second movie and where he dies and he had lost a ton of weight he was in shape the whole time he was on camera and and and

he's he is he is literally the fan favorite if you look at like any message board any forum any subreddit that discusses star wars they do not like this trilogy this did not go well they don't like what happened with the ray character and how and how everything ended but they love luke skywalker and they wanted him he he doesn't it's not it's not him being like yeah i should have been a badass it's like i i am a badass you like set me up and for three movies as like the greatest badasses of all time there's like a prophecy about me and like you know yeah he should have been a badass instead of like coming back as a like sitting there cross-legged on his island and then like i don't know i just wanted to hear your retort to what he's saying it was about me me with hamill because your eyes were just daggers that's what i'm saying that's what i'm referring

to right now like like it is about him it's his story it was the story of luke skywalker that's what the first three movies are all about how there's a prophecy of the one who's going to come and balance the force and then he showed up and he balanced the force and he defeated like every obstacle in his way like the right way he was never tempted over to the dark side he's just win win win win win strongest character in the universe like last jedi master remaining and they just kind of threw his character away well how are they going to make new jedi masters if the last one isn't there to teach he's supposed to be there to train one and and then they become a Jedi Master, but he

gets there at the end to fight and he doesn't fight. Even Yoda in that stupid sequel movie had an awesome lightsaber battle. Dude, that was weird too. That was cool. When Yoda was flipping around all crazy. Right, so Yoda's walking with the cane the whole time

and then it turns out the cane is a ruse. I loved it. I loved it i loved it and there's like some music and stuff but a little part of me is like i'm in the government i am it was weird that he could sword fight like that and not walk and uh mark hamill was fat in the first movie i think i think he was he lost weight but he went from super fat to really fat, if I recall. And in the second one, maybe he looked better. But it just felt self-serving for him to be like, I should be the toughest guy in the next trilogy too. Pass it on.

Obi-Wan wasn't, I don't know, the badass so much in the first trilogy. And by the way, Jedi's going to sulk in privacy. It's like totally a Jedi thing. Yoda did that. Obi-Wan did that. Luke did that. That's right on par for them to have a giant midlife crisis or end-of-life crisis, whatever you call it. Him going away and sucking on penguin titties,

that's like what yoda did titties it was how he went out at the end it was how he died that's what i had a problem he could have died fighting that would have been fine too he died because look he sat cross-legged on his island tailor and he like force projected his image onto another planet across the galaxy and he he was literally a distraction to hold back the army his like a ghost of him was because they thought it was real and like the man like the big bad guy wanted to fight him and so he distracted them long enough for the good guys to get away and that killed him yeah apparently uh force projecting was so exhausting he turned into dust uh marvel he got all tuckered out taylor did you know what he should have done is he should have stopped before it killed him

he should have stopped right before it just turned off the broadcast and he just been weakened a little right is that that's how it works Or he's projecting even for a moment like a death sentence and the clock was ticking down. You're right. I don't care about the Star Wars universe at all. I didn't watch the third movie because that upset me so much. That would really piss me off. That he dies because he knows everything

about the world and the universe's mysteries but he doesn't know when is too much for his dust turning limit in my opinion he's self-sacrifice kind of suicided so that these other people could get away by the way he could have probably what they although the same thing would have happened if he just got in the ship with ray and actually went there and and just died which would have been perfectly acceptable maybe he was died enough if he had just died in a fight have been perfectly acceptable. Maybe he was tied enough.

If he had just died in a fight or if he'd done that thing that Obi-Wan Kenobi did in the first Star Wars movie where he just lets Darth Vader kill him. He's like, if you strike me down, I will return more powerful than you can even imagine. Like that's acceptable. Who got the last laugh?

Yeah. Darth Vader. There's like, are you, are you dumb? No, you're going to be a neutered ghost at best and he didn't return more powerful than he could ever imagine he barely returned at

all he was a dream it's a good point but thank you maybe he maybe he thought like that that would like back darth vader down he was oh shit the truth is i never thought i could win this fight and i was hoping you nobody i want to lie about the powers i did it was terrible why would you trick me into this blue who's the perennial the best swordsman in the universe is it yoda um lightsaber battle and you gotta watch on youtube to get that answer general grievous loses like four arms to obi one at a time right am i right seems like obi-wan kenobi was he's the only deep drive reference i have it seems like obi-wan kenobi was the best that we

saw on film because he just defeated everybody like he beat darth maul yeah um but didn't they two on or two on one darth maul for a bit they they weakened him well he killed qui-gon jinn so they were separated by the they were they were two on one for like a moment but that had no i forgot he kills liam neeson first yeah but and then like i think there's some like fan fiction about mace windu like samuel jackson's character. He defeated the Emperor, but then Anakin comes in and sucker punches him

and cuts his hand off. I don't know. It seems like Obi-Wan Kenobi's got the best record in the Star Wars cinematic universe. Darth Vader beat him, though. Sure, it's a default victory, but that's because Obi-Wan gave up. They need a rubber match to

figure that one out because he already defeated darth once who defeated darth vader in the lightsaber battle ever obi-wan obi-wan he cut his leg that's how he became darth vader oh yeah yeah but that was anakin he probably got robot powers like he's he's actually less powerful because of the suit really oh? Oh, that's stupid. I choose not to believe that. No. Less powerful? He's got all that technology.

They're going light speed through space, and it's taking him. It's a life support suit, not like a Superman suit. He's walking around in an iron lung. Man, this is way less cool now that you're telling me. With no legs and missing an arm. I think that that. He can't breathe on his own. The breathing option was more of an intimidation factor.

It was a choice. That or the hot air from the lava seared his lungs. Yeah. Yeah. Man, that's disappointing. You're right. His suit didn't do anything cool. It actually, apparently it was made to be extra uncomfortable and irritating to his

skin so he'd always be mad and it would help enhance his uh is that true is that part of the that's true but he's in charge i think you're right no he's not i googled who was the best uh sword master and it's like as if kyle was reading it while i asked it to him obi-wan kenobi is is is the greatest jedi swordsman something about mace Windu was considered a master of all the forms. There's Sarushu and something else. Anyway, all the guys Kyle named are at the top of the list and, and Obi-Wan,

my scanning is number one. And I hate star Wars. I like to, it's always like to finish these talks off with, I feel like it makes my opinion that Star Wars is bullshit. It bolsters that opinion. To let you know that I am so steeped in Star Wars backstory and knowledge. I've read the comics.

I've watched the animated shit. I watched these deep dive videos where they're talking about characters that were written about in non-canon novels. All sorts of bullshit. I know about Yoda's girlfriend. I'm on board. If you rail against Christianity, yet you don't know any of the Bible, your opinion doesn't count for too much to me. But if you're an expert in the Bible and you rail against Christianity, you can go toe-to-toe with the people that support it, then you're more impressed. So anyway, that's you.

You're an expert in the Jedi Bible, yet you hate it. I hate it. It's the most overhyped, overblown, terrible. I mean, the first three are awful. Every one of them are awful. Here's me ranking star wars content every one of them the clone wars is the best thing that was ever made it's it's number one okay number two in my opinion is the mandalorian maybe i've got recency bias but i really like pedro pascal i really like the mandalorian backstory the mythos and everything

and i i kind of i do like the nostalgia of them going back mythos and everything. And I kind of, I do like the nostalgia of them going back to a universe that could have been so good, but wasn't. And they're, they're making it pretty fucking good. I agree with you. It's not the best show ever. It's not game of Thrones and it's prime. It's not that, but it's real good. And I, and I, whenever it's coming on, I go watch it. And then the third, the third best, uh, star Wars property that I've ever seen was rogue one i liked rogue one a lot when they go to like steal the plans for the death star you got a whole new cast of characters none of which you've ever heard of before you got that cool robot that you actually

feel sorry for when it dies that's the third very good after that i don't fucking care any it's all about the same it's all garbage some of it's more infuriating than others rogue one might be number one to me it's great that's my favorite that's great i wish they do like um batman right this is christian bale's batman uh return of the dark knight is that what it's called something like that dark knight returns yeah okay i think i think you're right yeah and uh that to me to my recollection was the first mainstream sort of gritty superhero story it was dark right good guys had a bad side and it could be rough and i thought it was really good you know i think there was a little hype around heath ledger's joker and his death and that made it like the highest ranked movie of all time. It beat Casablanca or something.

Gone with the Wind, whatever it beat. Yeah. But it was really good. And I think I'd like to see them do that with Star Wars like they did with Rogue One. You know, go dark on it. Stop making it for children. Stop trying to wrap toy sales and video games into it. You're right.

But this is my dream. I want them to take Star Wars and go dark with it. And let's give that a try. Yeah, I agree. Look, I like the Christopher Nolan Batman trilogy. I like it. I certainly don't love it. I like the first one. Like is definitely't love it. I like the first one.

Like is definitely the word. I really like the second one. Heath Ledger just really makes everything better. The third one's garbage. The third one is hot fucking garbage. The Bane one? Yeah, the Bane one.

It makes no sense. You have to suspend so much disbelief that you might as well be watching the older batman movies like batman forever and stuff where he's fighting arnold schwarzenegger's mr freeze and uma thurman's uh like poison ivy and it's just absurd like like i don't know if you remember mr freeze's henchmen are hockey players like he has they come out with sticks and skates and there are goals set up. And guess what? Batman has go-go gadget skates in his boots.

So he's prepared. Yeah, that was a cool movie. Yeah, if you're eight, which you probably were in 1994 or whenever the fuck that shit came out. Anyway, the third one is like that. There is this scene where Bane and his group of thugs have taken over gotham city which is just a stand-in for new york city and they've got a nuclear device i get it so like maybe you can't assassinate bane or the whole city goes pop but there's that scene at the end where i think batman it's an all it's an all-out fight so the bomb's out of play now street brawl and we're

gonna have a street brawl to determine to determine like the future of Gotham. No one has a gun and no one has a blade. You can go back to gangs of New York and they're better armed than the 2014 Batman movie or whenever it was when they're having a street ball gangs in New York, at least they're fucking bringing out clubs and blades and knives and shit. They went fisticuffs to determine the future of a city yeah and it was i'm watching it like what the fuck is this we're gonna have a fit

does it matter who's gun laws in gotham maybe very strict gun laws yeah as we as we all know those prevent guns from even being present that's true true. Also, did you notice the guns are in New York City? There's plenty. Thankfully, it wasn't a nuclear device free zone, but it was a gun free zone. I'm sure they remedied that immediately. No more of it. In that fighting brawl you're talking about,

everybody's running like it's 300 towards each other. And then you'll see guys from Bane's forces be like, I'm going to run past people who passed me so I can pair up with the guy they told me to. Oh, there's Mike,

my stunt partner. Come on, Mike, let's go. It's just a bunch of one-on-one fights. Then Batman, I think, just walks through and Bane's up there just at the top of the stairs. Yeah, that was. And then I remember the fight between Batman and Bane not making sense because they had wildly disparate analysis of Bane's strength throughout the film.

Where it'd be like, damn, Bane is so strong, he can pick up Batman by the neck and throw this 250-pound man with his metal suit on like a rag doll. And then other times, he's holding his back while he bends over. It's not – it's just there's no consistency. So then when you're watching them fight, it's like, oh, no, there's no way for Batman to win. We already established he has to be a clever, sneaky guy to beat Bane. That's his tactic. It's fucking Batman.

He doesn't go head-on and clash with someone stronger than them. He figures the workaround, right? No, he just starts just starts and then suddenly for the first time in the movie it's like bane and batman are the exact same strength and they're like trading batman had started exercising in the hole that's true that probably equaled up to what is bane's thing he like stole and now he's strong or he injects and now he's strong or he he injects breathing tremolo i'm going with that when i like it i'm always huffing he just inhales tremolo through that device in the cartoon he had like the cartoon he had like those tubes that like were running into his neck and he could like

pump more of that green shit like into his body and he could pump more of that green shit into his body. It was almost like he was just inflating. He was just like... That was my favorite version of the action figure that I had. Didn't know anything about Bane in the universe as a kid. I just remember seeing him at the store and being like, that guy rocks. He can take on all the Ninja Turtles at once.

And so that's what he did. Beat the shit out of the Ninja Turtles. Beat the shit out of all of turtles of the uh the power rangers too i don't think you take power rangers oh just he destroyed the power rangers and i know because i was god controlling it at the bottom of the stairs you know do you remember that like how how action figures no you're right i got plenty of space right down there in my house to play and he'll prove it if he has to. They can be the Power Rangers.

Like that same action figure toy thing where it would be like, dude, right now, the Street Shark is my uber most favorite. And so he's going to dominate Batman. He's going to trash the Flash, like all of it. And then after a while, it's like Shark Guy sucks now. Oh, Bane rocks. All right, Bane, you're my favorite. You're going to start off by taking on the ex-champion, the street shark. Oh, he's fucked up. Did you ever do that?

Oh, yeah. I absolutely did that. I was five, and I'm pretty sure you're talking about last Thursday. But I would have all my toys laid out in A team and B team, and I had a bunch of those little green army men. And so those would make up the the bulk of the force but of course yeah they were the fodder uh they're the front line soldiers but then i also had like you know all your like a lot of dc heroes like batman and stuff and i definitely had ninja

turtles and power rangers and maybe not power rangers because they that hadn't happened yet but i had ninja turtles and i had the ninja turtle van that shot the pizzas out the side that was fucking cool it would get involved uh and he-man i had a lot of he-man shit you know i remember like trying to shoehorn in like the scooby-doo gang in their mystery van because i had the whole mystery van set i got for a gift and it was a really cool van but after like a couple play sessions it was like all right this is now the street shark you know van this is this is shaggy's not getting anything done in these fights velma has gotten ko'd immediately in every battle she's been in this isn't losing her glasses fred and fucking dana or whatever the fuck are having sex in the back seat of the mystery mobile yeah which was heavily implied throughout that show yeah yeah daphne i think that was her name

right it was heavily implied they were having sex in the back uh not in the back there but it was always because they were always a little touchy feely and then the the natural split up was like daphne and fred always went together and they would make sure like Velma had to go do like her alone thing. Cause she couldn't lose her glasses every episode. If she had someone with her to pick them up right away. And then Scooby and Shaggy obviously. And they, even though they're like the D team,

they're the ones who always get results. Fred, Fred is all that Fred does is take credit at the end of the episode with the final reveal yeah his dick's still wet from daphne in the broom closet and you know that high motherfucker shaggy and the dog he blows smoke into the ear they're the ones who who really are finding the yeah those are the ones who they were always stoned every time they'd come out of the van there'd be a little puff of smoke following out behind them. It was great. Like Scoob.

I'm old enough to have watched the Flintstones too. When I was watching Scooby-Doo as a kid, I did not know they were stoners. It's pretty clear now. It's just like a pot leaf. Did you watch the Flintstones too? Yeah.

I know you watched the Flintstones. I didn't watch yeah my grandparents i know you watch the flintstone i i didn't watch that i liked more than the flintstones i liked the jetsons i watched the jetsons i liked anything with bam bam he was my favorite i like bam bam too yeah i think he was also my favorite um i was a bit of a bam bam as a child i was just running around breaking shit i didn't wear as many clothes as Bam Bam did though. I like that Bam Bam could beat anybody up. Like his father would get into trouble at work and Bam Bam just like banging

people around. Like anytime his dad was about to get crushed, Bam Bam would take care of things. Hell, I and like what a great marketing campaign. How did they go from all right we got this cartoon about these cavemen to vitamins vitamins that's our product what no

dave what are you talking about we have a cartoon about cavemen it's a comedy show come on some toys maybe or maybe how about how about a club that looks like bam bam's club kids love that right get them one of those little leopard print togas. Right, with the stone wheels. Vitamins. They're still a thing, aren't they? They still sell vitamins. Yes.

Fucking Dirty was in the chat the other day eating half a bottle of them as he sat there. He got a super bad headache. Yeah. You were telling him the whole time that that's not candy. It says it on the side that that's not candy it says it on the side that's not candy like he the only person like the dosing for for for children two and up is uh is and i'm like he's like i'm way over two he's like doing the math like a 25 year old man can take a dozen of these things apparently like no you know how much copper and like iron that is like you're gonna get a headache yeah

you're gonna get way too much zinc copper and iron and you're gonna get nauseous and feel like shit i'm gonna shoot coppery loads yeah or it'll make you feel shitty and you won't shoot any loads at all i don't know how the math works i know that copper and zinc like use the same reuptake system or chemicals or whatever and so like if you take a ton, like way too much zinc, you could develop a copper deficiency or the other way around, but you have to really, you'd have to do something as dumb as eating an entire container of Flintstone vitamins in one sitting in order to get that.

Yeah. So the load stack is moving along. Um, Taylor just needs to, after the show, obviously, you know, we want to,

yeah, I saw that pop up. Stuff's been happening mid-show, but Taylor just needs to settle on a label and they can begin production. I think Derek told me that we're looking at January for sure.

Obviously, because it's taking so long to get the label going. That's the main thing that's been our hold up. I hope it does well because I have more ideas. I've been researching heavily. First of all, there's a lot of compounds in the load stack. Like there's a lot at this point because I've done so much research and I keep finding new things and we just keep adding them. And Derek also, like he has friends who are like

into biohacking and this thing. And they're like, Oh no, yeah, I've been doing this thing for years and it works really well. And it's like, all right, we'll throw that in too. So like on the side, I've been looking at how to flavor your cum and I have found a lot of interesting things.

There are two products that are, that already exist and they are insanely expensive, like hundreds of dollars a month or something like that for one of them like and i looked at the ingredients and it's like this is like five dollars worth of shit they're selling for 150 a bottle like like i'm not looking to rip anybody off like i just want my calm to take we come in at 149.99 yeah i'm fucking We're going to undercut them by at least a percent. So, um, cause I,

cause I don't know. I don't know this for sure. I'll, I'll maybe I'll, maybe I'll, I don't know. I'll see my text message says maybe I'll find out a day or two. Um,

what my cum tastes like. And, uh, um, but I, but I think with like some of the other supplements that I'm taking, I was reading that like things like heavy metals, like,

like not heavy metals, but, like not heavy metals, but metals like zinc and, and, and iron. And I think a lot of supplements like that can cause like some flavor issues with common. They were like, Oh,

this makes it taste bitter and this can make it taste sour. And this can make it taste like this and like, like, like chalky. And I was like, Oh, chalky. And there was like a lot of flavors that corresponded to various

vitamins and minerals. But then they had a list of how to counteract each one. And it was like, ah, this stuff gets rid of that zinky taste. This stuff right here, no more problem with all that copper you're taking in. That's a perfect next step for us. First, we master how to make the loads volume as big as possible. And then we take that voluminous load and we specify, we, we, we get into the DNA of it and make, make it taste exactly to your girlfriend's preference or your boyfriend's

preference. We don't care as long as you're buying it or your preference beat off into your own mouth. If you want and, and gave your own reception, you know, Kyle, you should probably for the sake of, you know, Kyle, you should probably,

for the sake of, you know, making sure it's a valid and replicable test for semen taste, you should probably, you know, at least a little... She's coming. She's coming. Now, Kyle, I think you could get results back tonight if you were dedicated to the cause. I mean, but I... I can overnight a sample to you, Woody,

and you could just get back to me. No, once the temperature's changed, that's just... I mean, I wish I could. I wish that would work. You're tasting it like wine. You're like, get me a sample. You're doing that thing.

We'll get it done. I'm a camalier. Camalier. I think that's the product name. I'm getting notes of vanilla. Notes of vanilla. And chlorine. Yes.

We need to have camalia, strawberry, camalia, coconut, whatever it is we can do. It's a, it's an, it's like,

and it's like a waiter holding a glass full of cum. You like smelling it first. Ooh. So you want to let notes of honey, right? I'm picturing a guy with a tux you know animated a cartoon with the the little butler tray and a dildo that's ejaculating you know and it could be white for coconut red for cherry yeah maybe that's

maybe red oh hey if we can color our cum. That just sounds festive. Regulations as we can. Ho, ho, ho. Right in time for Christmas. Red and green cum. Your girl will hate it. Red and green cum. It's gonna look like that

AIM toothpaste with the Oh, yeah. Dude, that's the best best toothpaste for your kid and you see that shit the only thing better than that as a kid remember the bubble gum uh like toothpaste uh yeah that pink shit that tasted like bubble gum how could that be good for you like even as like a six-year-old i was like this can't be the best thing for my dental hygiene. It seems like there's sugar in my toothpaste.

I mean, it tastes good. This is literally... Am I brushing my teeth with candy right now? There's no way this is the best thing. I like the bubblegum flavor. As a kid, I liked the grape kind. I think that's what I used. There was grape toothpaste?

It was like gorilla grape toothpaste or something. It was a picture of a big ape on there and it was like man monkeys brush their teeth i better also um i use baking soda toothpaste no no it's it's charcoal it's charcoal and baking soda it's like the still use that do you yeah you gotta stop that charcoal shit you know what that's doing right like it's just a higher level of grit and so it's like actually wearing away the abcid enamel of your teeth like you don't it's made by colgate it's not like i'm like grinding charcoal up in my in my back oh no i don't know like i know that but over time like you'll develop teeth sensitivity because it's scraping off little layers i'll be okay what is this the whitening

stuff you're talking about charcoal toothpaste it was really big a few years back and then people were like yeah this is causing sensitivity and grinding issues what does it do does it make your teeth whiter like what's the upside yeah it makes your teeth a lot wider because it's literally removing enamel. So you're saying it's whiter, though. Yes, to a point. And then it will become very painful and much darker. I'm going to replace these in like five or ten years anyway. Every couple of years anyway. It seems like you should be on board.

I've been a couple of years on these teeth, on these chompers. I know, I know. But what, every ten years, 15 years, you get new teeth? In the next, like, well, it was this past time, like three years ago, two years ago, whatever it was. Maybe almost three. And then I'll switch them again to veneers in like two or three years or whenever these start falling out of my head. And then that will be the last time. Because veneers are fully permanent.

Unless, like, once again, false. Knock one out. Veneers are fully permanent. Unless, like, it once again falls apart. Veneers are fully permanent? Like, you're a young guy. You're saying they last 50 years? Yeah. Yeah, veneers last a long, long time. And I could always get one if I wanted to.

Yeah, it's tougher than our teeth. So, I think it is. I like it. You go with aftermarket parts that are better than the factory things. I see where you're headed on this. I mean, it wasn't a choice i had to for one to have teeth but it's for having teeth there's this race car mentality right like first you make the engine stronger and then you got to make the transmission stronger then you got to make the rear end stronger i feel like you have an aftermarket mandible right the the the muscles there so now

you got to make the t stronger before long you'll do like a jawbone upgrade race you know what i'm gonna do i'm gonna i'm gonna skip the veneers and go straight to like jaws from uh from james bond sharp entire interlocking teeth i remember at the time seeing that guy in jane and i guess all these movies and i was like seven seeing him and being like damn that guy is so cool i want to be just like him like i think in my head i remember the thought being like man everybody respects that guy as an offense is the worst as a defense sometimes opportunities present themselves right but imagine taylor taylor imagine you're gonna fight someone who's like good at fighting but your offense is limited to biting it's the worst you get your ass kicked so bad we'd be able to buy them we have

human mouths we don't even have a snout you You gotta get an angle to hit a certain area. Are you eating with your nose and your chin in this fight? This is a terrible idea. Best case scenario, you cut their hand when they punch you. That's about right. I think that's about right. How do you feel about the headbutt, though?

Headbutt would be better for me. I feel the headbutt is a good opening move. Especially if you do that move where you grab them by the collar and really pull and hammer it at the same time i feel like it has some of the same drawbacks that the biting does like i i feel like if other people let yeah but you're really exposing your face i'll tell you what back when headbutting was allowed in mixed martial arts it it wasn't used very much. But I bet when it was. Yes, because they're squaring off first.

Are you ready? Are you ready? But in a bar or something, if you could close distance with someone and actually grab them by the collar like that, first of all, they can't punch you. They're having to go around your arms like this. They're not going to have a lot on it. They can't twist or pivot. It seems like you have so so much power you know what i would do i would have you ever seen a giraffe fight i would take all my momentum and swing my head into it from the side like that that might help and they'll be so confused by the nobody

expects a telegraphed headbutt actually actually what is he doing yeah i don't know much about head bites i don't think i've ever fought in a fight that involved a headbutt and i certainly haven't done any training that involves headbutts i know nothing yeah i don't know if i could headbutt properly but i know i would i know i would much rather get punched real hard than headbutted real hard. Yeah. So the headbutts I've seen in, like, real fights, in the UFC back when you could, a guy would have, like, full mount or side control and he'd headbutt. But it seems like you could use elbows in that situation. I'm talking about that boss rootin' headbutt that he talks about opening up fights with.

And when he does it, just when he's talking about it even like 50 year old boss rooting it looks so quick and powerful he's just like he's just like you know you just boom it's just like oh god you kill someone and he's like talking about trying to hit hit the bridge of the nose with it uh yeah he i he'd be terrible to fight him. I have a guy who wrote in and he gave his case for fighting baldness, like denying that it's happening. Do you want to hear this? It's about a minute long read. I thought it was interesting. Okay. He kind of won me over on this.

All right. He lays it out. I don't need to preface it. Hey, Woodyody big fan in the newest episode you said people who are balding should stop hiding it and i wanted to offer you another perspective from someone who is balding i'm i'm gonna say mid-20s anonymize him a little bit now and i recently and i first realized my bald spot when i was 17 it was devastating and took a huge hit to my confidence. I've always been well-liked.

I played varsity baseball and basketball in high school, and I was in a large top fraternity at an SEC college, so I went out to a lot of bars and parties. As you bald, your hair gets thinner, and it created a pretty bad look for my scalp. But I could get away with it using colored hair fiber to cover it up for the most part. Do you away with it using colored hair fiber to cover it up for the most part do you guys know about this colored hair fiber are we talking about like a fiberglass type material that he has so i googled it i didn't know about this it's called topic and this is

i had i put like a bunch of things together because my twitch chat says that I use this. But I will, this is the website. Trying to give people a little bit of background on what he used, because it's relevant to the story. And so what I thought people used was like a spray paint almost that went around the hairs and made each hair thicker which it gives like a bit of volume but these are little hair fibers that you seem to shake into your head and it kind of looks like regular hair looks pretty good in the videos anyway dude if it

rains does it come off or if you get wet yes yeah yes you get a rudy juliani if you scroll down taylor it looks like a salt shaker full of cocoa powder i i see it and it for a second i thought those were little bits of hair but that's probably not right they kind of are there it so it looks like cocoa powder in that picture i'm with you kyle but i've seen it um under more magnification and they're very short strands of hair that i guess kind of attached to your hair like get caught up in your own hair and and oh it does say rain and wind resistant but not true they don't yeah yeah yeah so let me i'm wayne is he right and when resistant what does that even fucking mean he yeah he uh let me keep reading because he talks a little bit about water okay so let's see it gets thinner it's

a bad look for my scalp but i could get away with it using a colored hair fiber to cover it up for the most part but you don't always have that stuff in your hair and with thinning hair it looks terrible after wake up waking up in the morning or after a long day of sweating it's often easier just to wear a baseball hat than to maintain. A strong wind or going underwater like at a lake could ruin your hair until you shower again. That's why men often cover it with baseball caps or I guess beanies. Doctors don't recommend hair transplants for anyone under 25 because you won't know the extent of how much farther back your hairline or bald spot will be in a couple of years as it worsens. This didn't ruin my social

life in college and I was able to get away with it wearing a cap or hair fibers for events and I never got much flack for it. Now at 24, it's getting worse and I pretty much accept that I'll have to shave it by 26 or so unless it magically stops falling out soon. I do use medication which has slowed the balding. I worked at an office before, I'm sorry, I worked in an office before COVID, and my mind constantly races if someone's standing behind me, even with the bright lights, they can probably tell the hair fibers.

So I pretty much accepted that even after I got a hair transplant, I don't like my prone to bald, prone to look bad hair, so that's why I plan to shave it. I'm just not ready yet. So I wear a baseball hat unless I've showered, and I put in the hair fibers, which I don't do anymore since I work from home. So I hope this helps you understand why we don't just shave and just try to hide it. When I've recently showered and the hair fibers are in, I look decent. I believe

far better overall than if I were to be bald. So I'm just not ready. But if you saw me in the morning with no hair fibers, it would look awful. That's, that's his take on it. And, um, I didn't even know this was an approach. Derek just did a video like yesterday, uh, called like the nuclear option for hair loss. And it's like all these, like, he's like, it's tons of like medications and drugs that's like a lot of side effects a lot of side effects some bad ones some bad ones actually this is what you would give to chemically castrate someone it's like all sorts of like nuclear options for hair loss it was an interesting video there was a i don't want to get it wrong maybe one of the try

guys got hair restoration surgery and something. Does this sound right? I think I've heard something about that. I've never seen the content. So it's not a secret. The guy made a video about his hair restoration and how it damages own self-confidence. And, um,

and then he got this back and he feels much better about himself, which I'm all on board with. Knock yourself out. I want to get rid of this stigma. I feel like if women had hair restoration surgery, it would just be like you know yeah a lot of women get it when they're 25 it's it's just a thing they do dude you guys you guys may you listeners who are 23 years old might not realize pretty much every girl starts dying her hair the second she gets her first gray every girl you know who's over like 25 dyes her hair they don't have even one gray usually um and if it were

if women lost hair i feel like it'd be super normal for them to have like anti-hair losing stuff but uh definitely uh but of all these guys you're supposed to just tough it out there's nothing i don't think there's anything wrong with them using this stuff like no there's nothing wrong with it i wouldn't do anything visual like that like like a cream or a like a like a spray or like the little fake hair fibers um but i would i would definitely look into like pills or like finasteride or minoxidil. So this guy's situation in particular where he couldn't get restoration surgery because he's too young. They don't like you to get hair. What they do is they take hair from the back of your head and put it on the top, I guess, the roots one at a time.

But you don't do that at like 22 because i guess you're still balding you're still figuring out where you're headed so if this is a bridge for you knock yourself out i don't know it could be the same explanation i got for lasik which when i was his age and for you know his balding started at 17 my eyesight worsening started at six, I think. And so like all the time I was like, can't wait to get six good years. Yeah. No, I didn't have six good years.

It was, why can't Taylor read off the chalkboard? And I was like, I can't see it. And they're like, what do you mean you can't see it? And it's like, was it like that scene to the blackboard?

And then they did. And they're like, he's still not like writing or reading any of the stuff on the board and they took me to the doctor like immediately like oh this motherfucker doesn't know what's being written i just imagine it's like that scene from my left foot you ever seen my left foot with daniel day lewis no but you've told me to it's like when they true story and he's got i believe it's cerebral palsy forgive me if i'm wrong but like whatever it is um he's like severely handicapped to the point where he can only use his left foot with any precision. And as a young boy, I don't know, 5, 6, 7, 8, he just lays on the floor.

They just leave him laying on the floor because they don't know what to do with him. And they think that he's mentally retarded. And one night, the mother is teaching the other children some basic arithmetic or ABCs or something like that. And the chalk falls on the floor. And he gets the chalk with his left foot. And I can't remember exactly what he does, but he solves the math problem or something. Help! He solves the math problem with his foot.

And his father, who's like working class i don't i don't i don't remember what coal mine or whatever is just like my boy my boy is in there and he like runs to the bar with like his little boy on his back and he's like this is my boy this is my boy and it's just like it's super powerful before that the dad's like that fucking waste of space he thought he thought his son wasn't in there he didn't think he had a son really he just had well i guess i was just like the my left foot guy if that's where you're going that's exactly where i was going i was asking if your parents thought you were retarded no they thought that i was well they didn't live what if you'd lived the first

six or seven years of your life and they thought that you were like like a re they thought you were retarded they knew i was badly behaved sometimes so i'd run around all the time but then they also it wasn't because i was retarded they they put me and i've said this many times in the show so i'll keep it short they put me in like the learning to read for slow kids class where like while the other kids went to do something did their reading like me and two other people and i've said before like i got in this class and i immediately i'm like i do not belong here in this class all right kids put your drool rags on wait what dude but like you say all the vowels starburst. You don't get you don't get candy in that class for a good bit until it was like like that. That may be my first like academic dread is like someday I'm going to have to leave this candy class.

Because like the reason they put me in there is because I just tried to memorize all the stories in the books instead of learning how to read. And so I would just like say what the story was and they'd be like, no, no, no, no, no. You're talking like, you just said a boy rode a bike. That's not this story. And so I got caught. And so then they sent me to that class. And I stopped trying to memorize it. At what point did they send you to the optometrist?

That was actually the year after. That was first grade, I think. I was beginning of first grade, so you're six. That's when I first got my contacts and glasses. How could they be so misguided? How did no one notice that you were essentially blind? That is some incompetent parenting to not figure out that your kid can't see. Parenting and teaching.

I'm exaggerating with the couldn't read because my eyesight was just starting to get bad. But it was like to read stuff or try, I would have to get closer than other kids. I couldn't. Yeah, that's how you notice. What a tricky, tricky thing to pick up on. I can see how no one got that. That's a tough nut to crack. Nancy Drew, come over and solve that mystery.

How many baseballs did you eat to the mouth playing e-ball before someone, you know, not only is he retarded terrible hand-eye coordination. Yeah, that's ridiculous. I guarantee that scared my dad a lot when I was little. I think about Colin. Soccer, I was terrible. Him, hearing specialist, vision specialist, like everything just to

make sure we got everything checked out, see what we could do for him. You over there, just... The ball's right over there, Taylor! I can actually see that, but I don't want it. I'm going to keep... I remember my dad would be like, can you just stop playing with bugs in the outfield?

Can you just stand there and play? Oh, mine would scream. Mine would scream from the bleachers. Oh yeah, I'm punching my glove let's go let's go let's go tigers oh don't play oh it's another bug no don't look at the bug don't look no don't look at the bug it's more interesting than the ball but don't look at the book i remember like my my dad's like one of his happiest days of his life was like because i would rollerblade like in my basement all the time like with the hockey stick and play that just for fun before they had like hockey leagues and they got me in a roller league when

I was six uh which is like I think the earliest you could start hockey on roller at six years old and I was immediately I was really good at that because I had been skating my whole life and like I'd been playing against like the few friends of mine that could skate and like I remember him like when I would score and stuff to he'd be like, oh, woo! Like, wait a minute. Oh, because that was before I played goalie. And he was like, oh, we got something. We got something for him.

And then my younger brother, not the youngest, but my younger one is like all-star fucking athlete at everything. Like, the one thing, I got to a higher level and competed at a higher level of hockey than him, but he was better at football. He was better at baseball. He was better at soccer. He was better at baseball. He was better at soccer. He was better at fucking probably tennis, probably all of it. But yeah,

felt good. Felt good when I was like, oh, now my dad's not going to have to be secretly ashamed of me while catching baseballs to the face. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I saw, if we can move on, if we're moving on from that, I saw a a movie a brand new one so i

won't spoil it we talked about it recently fat man the christmas movie i was just talking to my dad about that yeah yeah with mel gibson in it is it it's it's like if you go into it no one's like it's going to be like a tongue-in-cheek silly but also you know kind of intense Christmas movie. You'll like it. Mel Gibson does really good. He's a good actor. Walter Goggins. Yeah, Walter Goggins. He's like the assassin, the high-tech fighter

guy. He's tremendous, and I really like him a lot more. He is really good. I don't want to give away too much but it's i won't say anything actually it's really fucking good i my girlfriend didn't like it as much because she's like i thought this is going to be way less violent no it's like you know people

like oh you know how die hard die hard is technically a christmas movie even though it's shooting in violence you know that like old meme this is so much more violence than die hard and much more intimate level violence like die hard a lot of just you know firing over this way oh i'm ducking back in the room oh firing back over that but you're not seeing like where did you see it this uh i bought it or i rented it off amazon it was like seven bucks or something yeah just uh last night my girlfriend and i watched it. It was pretty good. Mel Gibson isn't nearly fat enough to be Santa, but when

people, I'll just say, when people find him and wherever he is, trying to kill him, trying to shut him down to finally get Santa, he's got the intimidating posture of you think you're the first to have tried. That kind of thing. it's it's really funny like the the little like supernatural things they give santa

where like some some heavy thing falls over this is an important story point but like these two guys are like trying to lift it and he's like one second boys just this fat old man just right away so it's like all right santa's got super strength yeah super longevity so he's like in some way a superhero in this so it's really good you'll like it i think you'll both like it as long as it says it's bad i hope you're right and they're wrong we'll see well i mean it's they're always gonna trash mel gibson movies he has punched his ticket in hollywood reviewers are not gonna give his movies a good review. I wanted the blowjob before the jacuzzi.

Before the jacuzzi. I hope you're raped by a pack of... Brutal. Brutal voicemails. I left my water bottle at my dad's house when I went to visit him. Literally on the drive home, I Amazoned a new one. I like this one better. This is an iron flask.

Do they have a noisier one? Maybe with like a cowbell. This is actually the Maraca. Did you ever get those ball bearings in? Yes. I like to fill it with ball bearings. That way, you know,

when I'm alone, I can do myself a little mood music. No, this is the iron flask. And the difference between this one that I like is it's do myself a little mood music. No, this is the Iron Flask. The difference between this one that I like is it's got a carabiner. Yeah. It's got a clip, and obviously it's got the sippy straw thing. Unlike my other one that you had to tip back, this one's got a straw, which I prefer.

So yeah, it keeps my water cold all fucking day. It's 40 ounces, so I fill it up three times. It's a good water bottle. I like it. You think the straw's better? Yeah. I like not having to tip it back because I do put ice in there, as you can tell.

And sometimes when I would tip it back, the ice would clog the hole and I would be trying to get water out and I couldn't. The thing about the straw is it's either unclean or very difficult to clean. Here's the thing. Okay.

Maybe this is water out of it. Maybe this is dirty, but I don't wash these. I just keep refilling them. I don't even know if that's dirty. That's not even dirty. You're just drinking. Do you drink anything but water out of that? it's why it's just water i just keep filling it with water

we purely bring the water in right let's say it was a nalgene bottle right a simpler tip thing don't you think a little bit of spittle gets back it's not perfect i'm really good i mean i mean it gets rinsed out every time like when i get more water i sort of like do a little like swishy swish dump and then you know throw 10 ice cubes in fill the rest of the rest with water i do this three times a day straw so yeah then again you could argue that it gets flushed every time you drink from it kyle drinks like a kid drinks where he wraps his lips around the whole thing and dumps like have you ever seen that well i'm sure you have woody with kids like you see him tip a soda and you see like the the level go down and then the level go back up because

half a mouthful of soda just tips back up they haven't mastered drinking fluids yet no no they gotta keep them on straws for a while i want to see fat man yeah i don't want to overhype it but i it kept me engaged the whole time and it was a lot more killing than i thought the opposite i'm watching vice do you know this movie is it new uh call it a year too old um i think it's christian bale who plays dick cheney to call it a year too old um i think it's christian bale who plays dick cheney oh i heard about amazingly he plays him he like he is dick cheney he gets like hunchbacked he got fat christian bale is one of those guys who does body transformations as an actor he's fat he looks so much like dick cheney and i I guess I'm learning things and I hope this

movie's accurate because I'm taking it as mostly true that I didn't know like the fact that he's like how he did so well in his political career he's loyal to the right extent but not over so and not under so he uh he doesn't talk too much doesn't run his mouth, doesn't say the wrong thing ever. He thinks a lot more than he speaks. And I don't know, you just get to sort of learn what this guy's about. And they don't portray him as a benevolent politician. Dick Cheney in this movie is portrayed

as sort of a calculating, power-grabbing, hungry kind of politician. And, you know, know look so it's like the acting is top steve carroll plays rumsfeld very very well i i thought of him as an actor who you know got his start under john stewart and then had some funny films i didn't know his acting chops were this good you know like, like, I didn't know. Like, I didn't appreciate Philip Seymour Hoffman until after he died.

Then I'm like, man, he did kill every second he was on TV, didn't he? Steve, Carol, Carell? I think it's Carell. Carell, yeah. He's a really good, just, actor. He acts well. And, like, this cast is so amazing.

I saw Condoleezza Rice briefly, and I'm like, oh, my God, she did great, too. It wasn't her, the actress that played her. But the subject matter is a little boring. Even as a guy who follows politics like I do, I'm just like, yeah. It's the part where he shoots his friend in there. I haven't gotten to it yet. I haven't gotten to that part yet. There's a little bit of timeline bouncing back and forth i'm not sure if it'll be there but uh yeah it's i don't know i'm

watching vice i'll finish it if nothing else i'm blown away by the acting it's just not a story about evil santa or anything it's naturally entertaining yeah i'll probably watch uh fat man later tonight i'm gonna play some zombies as soon as we get done here nice but yeah i'll probably watch a fat man later tonight i'm gonna play some zombies as soon as we get done here nice but yeah i've been wanting to see that and i think it will i liked my my dad with that goddamn direct tv i wish i could find a way to like share shows with him i'm thinking about buying some dvds for him for christmas or some blu-rays what would you get him you know i just finished watching that just that show justified on hulu a few weeks ago and i think he might dvds for him for christmas or some blu-rays what would you get him you know i just finished watching that just that show justified on hulu a few weeks ago and i think he might actually like

that because it's kind of like a southern tv show a lot of like redneck actors in it and it's fun that they poke fun of that it's in kentucky and uh but he also likes like westerns and it's a bit of a western in a way like you know it's this gun toting cowboy hat wearing marshall it kind of reminds me of gun smoke a little bit does he watch longmire on netflix he doesn't have netflix he doesn't have the internet he has the internet it's just bad right that was about to ask well he just turned it off like it was so spotty and so poor that he was just like enough but it was tinder i guess his phone's probably better yeah just oh yeah that's his network but like when i when i got my my grandpa's netflix setup

and everything for him like we were in the kitchen talking my grandma or something and i come in and he's like switch back to regular tv and he's watching longmire this western show that's now on netflix on like a and e and i'm like oh do you like Longmire? He's like, yeah, I like Longmire. It's on at seven once a week. I'll pop in and check it out. And I'm like, Grandpa, just let me show you real quick. Go back to Netflix. And I'm like, look at this. Longmire, seven seasons.

He's like, all seven seasons of Longmire are on there. And I can just sit and watch any one of them. And I was like, yeah, any Longmire. He's like, any longmire he's like well shit excited to be like i can watch longmire whenever i want now like instead of popping in halfway through an episode like yeah i can't deal with well one i want to choose when i watch it right that's like a mandatory thing and two i don't like ads at all hulu thinks i'll i pay for hulu what happened is i paid for

espn plus then i got disney plus it turns out you had hulu and it's the same price so i have the bad hulu subscription with ads i watch it zero minutes a year i never i will not watch an ad yeah i have professional grade hulu and it's awesome uh i'm watching hulu right now uh what's this oh i'm watching letter kenny i fucking love letter kenny that is i can it's the dialogue is so unnatural that it grows on you more than a bit of it it grows on you if you got a problem with canadian gooses you got a problem with me you better let that one marinate. I like the hockey references and the Canada references.

I like it. It's just like there's something about it that it wears on me quickly. Like The Simpsons, South Park, King of the Hill, Family Guy. I could watch 10 episodes of any of those in a row and be like, oh, man, episode 10, there's a really funny moment. That one, I'm not totally tired of it. I can't imagine watching 10 episodes of Letterkenny in a row. The opposite is Taylor.

I really like the dialogue. The dialogue is the show's strength. But what else is it about exactly? Guy fighting neighbors or something? I like that. So I only like it when it's about Wayne. I don't like when they cut to the group of goths or whatever and that one kid that looks like Tom Cruise when it's about wayne i i don't like when they cut to like the the group of like goths or whatever and that one kid that looks like uh tom cruise when he's young like just fucking hanging out in their basement doing weird shit i don't like any of that i don't even like the hockey

players i find them annoying i like wayne i just i just want it to be like like they'll show like and his friends i like his sister i like his fat friend. I like the core group. I like Squirrely Dan and Wayne and his sister and the other guy. I do like when they get in fights. It's awesome. They're always getting in fights. It's fun. I love that he's always got the same manner as when he's going

to get in a fight. He's just rolling up his sleeves as he's walking. I like it when he gets into fights too and it's there's never any question who's gonna win it's like he's the toughest guy yeah he's the toughest guy letter kidding and other people want to go and measure themselves and see if maybe they're the toughest guy and they are not i don't believe are there any close fights i don't know i haven't given that water bottle two thumbs down just saying yeah

drink much idiot yeah do you have a drinking problem kyle do you have a drinking for you incompetent drinker yeah yeah the first time i was on airplane i wasn't even old enough to understand an alcohol drinking problem and i was just like oh because you can't drink right i inhaled some water um so yeah there's one where like the guy sucker punches wayne and knocks him out and then they have to take care of that and it's funny i was just talking i was talking about this kind of earlier the guy shows up and he's like yeah you suckered me bob he's like yeah i suckered you so let's let's shake hands be we'll be even then we'll fight again rubber match he's like all right good deal like he goes to shake hands with the guy and wayne pulls him in close head butts him and knocks him unconscious and then walks away it's

great now we're even yeah Did they do a rubber match? Actually, no. That was enough because the guy was just dead. He knew he couldn't beat Wayne anyway. They're trying to save the Canadia Gooses, which is what they call them. And they're putting out coyote decoys to scare the Gooses. To scare the Gooses. And they're like,

you know, these do scare the Gooses, but there ain't no coyote. They'd want anything to do with a Canadian goose. No, sir. Those Canadian gooses ever made it to Africa. The lions that have a hard time with them. That's right.

They run them right out. The only thing that wants anything to do with a Canadian goose is a Canadian moose. They're just like all about Canadian gooses. Like the whole episode is them. Like just repeating the same lines about the Canadian gooses. I hate the Canadian. I about Canadian gooses. Like the whole episode is them like just repeating the same lines about the Canadian gooses. I hate the Canadian. I hate Canadian gooses. They love them.

They're so mean. They're sitting there like pontificating on whether or not ants could ride a sea-doo. If there were enough of them. And they're sitting there like having this long drawn out discussion about whether ants could ride a seadoo or not and they're like you know they're really just a hot yeah they live in a colony they work together they support their queen they're they're a hop skip and a jump away from human beings if you really think about it if if they made a tiny jet ski for an ant i i think he could ride a seadoo they call them sedu's you do i think you

can ride a seadoo well he ain't got no opposable thumbs, so you'd have a problem right there. You'd have to get him a little foot pedal. Yeah, yeah. And then the one guy's like, I don't know. I don't know what I would think of an ant who left his colony to go ride in sedus. Well, hold it right there, bud. Imagine yourself. You've been

working hard for your colony. All of a sudden, a scientist shows up outside and says, hey, we want you to be the first ant to ride a sedu. We got it right here you're telling me you're not going to go ride that sedu damn right you're going to go ride that sedu you're going to be a legend they're going to be singing songs about you for generations you're the first ant to ever ride a sedu you get the fuck i'm sorry i spoke without thinking apology accepted see yeah she's so stupid those little dialogues are my favorite the rest of the plot not much to it i don't know yeah i just wanted to like more than i actually liked it i'm digging it i'm uh i'm watching season five right now it's that's where that

episode came from it's really funny it was great just random bullshit they're talking about little weird traditions that are just some of them are just like little known canadian traditions but some of them are just made up they do some sort of like super hard easter egg hunt like where one person every you know it rotates which one hides the easter eggs and you can't drink until you find them all it's that's not a fun game yeah they're always boozing on that show from like i think the season i've seen oh they're always wasted but they can't drink until they find all the eggs so they're all like that's really wanting to find those eggs otherwise they'll get wasted and not care about the eggs yeah yeah i guess

that makes sense they clearly had one year where they didn't have that rule and they didn't find all the eggs. Probably. They had to workshop it. Just like we're workshopping load stack. My workshop is complete. I've added two new things since last we talked that I did a little research and they seem to work. One of them I have been using.

Don't blow your load on the show. You can tell us the actual number. The other one I ordered and it's on the way. At this point, the amount of pills I take daily is shocking. If I said the number, you wouldn't believe me. A surprising percentage of them is just about

cum volume. Yes. Over, I think I'm taking a dozen pills a day for cum. is i'm not even sorely needed product it's like god and we are filling a a void that needed to be filled we're going to be filling a lot of voids by brock well played i like it there we go what business would you guys start if you wanted to have a post gig economy income like matt did prostitution ring yeah that's never gonna die it's probably the safest

thing well prostitution and marijuana same place in nevada that'd be good how would you get john's i don't know people guys who want to show up they'll just google search it yeah if you're google searchable don't the police google you it might be it's legal it's legal in nevada in some counties and so and because of like the the few amount of people who have brothels open like how much money are you spending on seo to get yourself included there and all those searches are going to be hyper specific like it's it'll sell fucking up yeah we'd be you know we we if we were all in a whorehouse right now doing our show from there i think it would be good advertising don't you yeah tremendous advertising be a fuck show every

show i would yeah i it could be a new bit all right for the next five minutes you have to vote and guess who's getting their dick sucked of the three of us if we all try to act like we're not it was kyle okay another kyle it was me i took reverse blue chew i'm not even hard perfect focus i upped my blue chew to the nine milligram uh uh uh pill i didn't know that i thought it'd be five or ten they went right i'm not complaining not at all six to nine though they went six oh six to nine now it all makes sense now it all makes sense so why did you up your blue chew your daily blue chew regimen uh because i was

just taking one and then biting another in half every day anyway and then it was just like holy shit i can just i can just buy a pill that is the correct dosage that i for me that my doctor recommended it's to lower blood pressure is that the deal like it's a vasodilator it does lower blood pressure it also uh you know makes your dick hard which is nice yes that's a side effect of it what's vasodilator really mean makes your veins bigger and bigger yeah more more blood pumping faster red blood pumping fast so it gives you there's like less back pressure on the pumping and you basically just have better veins yeah and i never i always thought it was a volume thing i'm like well don't you eventually just get more blood and then you have the same compression you did before but it's more like a back pressure thing like a

restrictive exhaust maybe on a motor. Exactly. And you'll also get a better pump in the gym. You'll be more vascular if you're looking for that sort of thing. That's smart. I'm going to start doing that. Huh. But does that help you get gains in the gym?

Yeah, forcing more blood into muscle tissue. Makes them perform better, perhaps? No? It makes you gain more muscle fibers on recovery. You're doing more damage to that muscle fiber. And you're also carrying more nutrients into the muscle fiber. Okay. All right.

I didn't really get it before. I just heard it's a vasodilator. And then I'm like, was I supposed to connect all those dots myself? Because I didn't really get it before i didn't i just heard it's a vasodilator and then i like was i supposed to connect all those dots myself because i didn't have that do you ever take any pre-workouts or anything no no i used to but i i didn't find it to be that i don't know for me i didn't think it did anything it might have been the wrong things it might have just been an energy type thing not like yeah there's some of them that have stimulants and some that don't and some have beta alanine which just as derek says makes your butthole itchy oh i might not have that one like normal doses has no performance enhancing like at all it just makes you itchy so you're like oh that shit i took works i can feel it it's just like yeah it's just making you itchy man ah i don't that's the worst supplement ever

just it's the worst itchy you want to lift no it's going to distract me from lifting whenever my wife dislikes someone she like curses them like i hope he gets itchy that's her that's her go-to that's her curse yeah that's quite magic at best i'll say like aids damn taylor he's playing hardball yeah i don't want him to itch i usually go with trapped underneath a burning car yeah i suffer longer if they're trapped underneath a not burning car well see the gas see that's the thing it's it's a bit of psychological torture too because in my curse i always mention that the the gas tank has been punctured and is slowly like dripping onto them a small fire right over there and they can't do anything to stop the puddle of

gasoline from slowly getting to the spark this happened in that batman movie you're roasted i wouldn't be surprised. It's probably happened in like 50 movies. It's a real trope. Whenever I take a long time to kill someone in Tarkov, I explain that that was my motivational. I wanted him to die terrified. I shot left of him, right of him.

That guy died a horrible death. Much worse than if I had headshot at him. I've been playing tarkov with larry and the boys before and like i'm like i see a guy like did you get him like no no i just scared the shit out of him though he won't be a problem for a while he's hunkered down yeah yeah i've had many opponents if you've ever been like solo like walking around it's all quiet

and tarkov and all of a sudden and the bullets are ricocheting you're like oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck yeah you can identify if the guy's in a team you know like like you just do you see a couple of them where you hear multiple footsteps and you don't give away any information you don't have to hunker down it's scary as fuck to get shot at in that game yeah yeah all right well it was a good show i enjoyed our guest this week yep um links down below for him links down below for our patreon patreon if you want to see the upcoming fuck show now would be a good time to sign up i think because it's the you know beginning of the month so you're getting the whole month ahead of you as far as i understand um and uh yeah i enjoyed it any outros nope we are good pka 520