Painkiller Already - PKA 537 w Harley - Woody sets yard on fire, Jake Paul vs Ben Askren, Justice League Snyder Cut

Episode Date: April 6, 2021

PKA episode 537 with our guest Harley Taylor. This episode of PKA is brought to you by Postmates and Goat.com. A couple of wonderful sponsors, but for now, we've got Harley looking wonderful in his office. And Kyle looking, you're a handsome man, but there's something different about you today. It's that crisp clash of your skin with that white blazer. That, what is it, like eggshell blazer? You're looking tremendous. What's the occasion? No occasion.

I got carried away with my online shopping, as I do, like 10 days ago or something like that. I mentioned it on a show or two ago. I ordered, like, I don't even know how many blazers they're still trickling in, you know, because I ordered them from different places. And last Thursday, I dropped this one and a couple more off at the tailor. tailor and uh you know got them got them tailored up and they they came in today

so very nice where do you go where do you go dressed like that like so like i feel like wherever you go you're gonna be dressed up now yeah the only place he got like i've been where you live i've been where you live you're the sharpest guy now okay oh you got to step it up then yeah i guess honestly this is kind of a compliment he's kyle spends all this money to impress what effectively amounts to woody and i yeah what about these fucking guys though though? These guys, too. That's true. They're not all in that color, though, right? You did a bunch of different ones, I'm sure.

Oh, yeah, I did a bunch of colors. I love that color. That's a sick color. It is, but there should be more than one. I thought it was pajama. I thought it was pajama at first. I thought it was like a relaxed one, but I guess it's like a leisure blazer, right? A little Kyle, wouldn't it?

If Kyle found a way to get a a pajama suit like you know they make those so i thought it was yeah oh that's yeah trashy and probably it is it is yeah no i got a bunch of colors like on a beach date yeah that's a great miami like uh csi miami look you know like that redhead guy who finds like murdered women at the docks all the time. Miami Vice look. You need a no socks, dock siders thing going on. You're all set. Yeah, I can't tell if you're the cop or the coke dealer in Miami right now.

Yes. Are you the undercover cop or are you actually the guy? A little bit of both. He's the narc. A little bit of both. Yeah, yeah. I'm working undercover selling the coke. I always play both sides. He's the informant. Either way, he's the narc. A little bit of both. Yeah, yeah. I'm working undercover selling the coke. I always play both sides.

He's the informant. Either way, he's doing it. Either way, he's doing a lot of it. Yeah, I got a bunch of them. I got a black one, a brown one. I got this one and then one that's a little more bluish than this one, a little darker gray. How many? Six, right?

Six or seven. I don't know. I didn't really pay attention i just kept clicking um you know i got some stuff from uh from express and some stuff from armani and some stuff from just gap and um and like it's like i said it's been trickling in all week you had to get them all tailored yeah i always like i'm not a jet i'm not a i don't have many suits but is it normal to order them and need to get them tailored afterwards? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I can't wear off the rack. My shoulders are really wide.

My, my, my waist is narrow. So it's like it ends up being like baggy in the, in the back and like, or, or too tight in the shoulder. So like, this is like an extra large. So when I got it, it was just like, it was way too big, but it fits in the shoulders and the, and shoulders, and the arms were the right length. So, like, I don't know. Yeah, I got to get them tailored. I hate dressing like that unless I have to.

I like it. Like, I would never opt to wear a blazer or a tie. Like, you're not going to jump into ties, are you? No, not going to jump into ties. I like kind of more of a casual look. Like, a button-up under this is fine, but I also like a graphic tee, like what I got going on now. Yeah, like you're wearing a graphic tee right now,

a rainbow with a skull on it or something. Yeah, something like that. I don't even know. Stand up. Do a little spin for us. Let's see what's going on. Let's see. There you go.

What's that? Yeah, Marlboro or something like that. Yeah, I don't know. Now I forget how you dressed before. Oh, leather jackets. Yeah. Yeah. I like that look too.

I got a lot of leather jackets. He shows up with a members only jacket. A members only jacket. Kyle is always wearing a jacket. Do you have one of those? I do not have one of those. Well, he has a knockoff members only jacket, of course. It's not a real members only jacket.

I do not have a knockoff members only jacket. The jacket you're referring to is one of the silliest purchases i've ever made that jacket is absurdly expensive do you have to be a member fellas you have to be a member tell me you paid a thousand dollars how much did you spend on your jacket how much did you spend you don't have to be a member of an Italian designer club. That's a stupid, expensive jacket. But I love that jacket. I keep looking for more of that jacket, and I can't find it.

I've scoured the internet because I thought I lost it the other day. It turned out I threw it in the back of my closet. Is that the one you're wearing all the time or no? Yeah, yeah. It's like that gray Armani thing with the biker style collar and it zips and it's uh yeah i like that jacket a lot if i don't have to wear anything but t-shirts i'll just wear a t-shirt yeah i got i gotta i'm gonna maybe uh you know date this weekend so this will uh i'm either wearing this one or the the brown one i haven't really decided yet but i'd try this yeah you're actually so you're actually going to end up getting dressed and putting on

like a jacket and spinning in the mirror and then trying on another one like you got options now so you yeah i feel like it's worth exploring mixing and matching you send it to another tinder date kyle holding you said you sent it to a brief literally you sent it to a previous date being like hey i'm going on another date so like which one should i wear you know let her know that you have options but like you really consider her close and trustworthy okay very manipulative is that weird is that weird to do that move i don't do that move so weird oh my gosh yes that would be fucking bizarre i was just playing a show in my head it was like a whole it's not that i've ever done it i was just imagining like a show and a guy it was starring kyle it wasn't you but he looked like you and

he just like you know was letting another girl know like yeah i got options you know it played out in my head it doesn't matter i was daydreaming that's when the laugh track comes in i was daydreaming about you in your face yeah fair enough fair enough fair enough yeah yeah yeah i um i don't know like i said online shopping is a bit of a problem um like like i i didn't know what to do with the boxes for a while i had this mountain of boxes in my dining room just what are you gonna fold each one of them up and putting it put it in a garbage bag no you just pile them all outside and then the garbage man throws them away do you think though I don't know if they'll do that.

Like I don't know if my garbage man will do that. They wouldn't do that here. They won't – my garbage man won't do that. I take duct tape and I don't want to break it all down. So if I have a ton of boxes, like when I order workout equipment, I'll just throw all the boxes in there and then do like three wraps around of duct tape to be like, all right, this is solid enough that he can just grab it, throw it in the back, and he's not dealing with a bunch of boxes. You've got good garbage, man. You do. Very good. You've got good garbage, man. I don't know if my guy will do that. This is solid enough that he can just grab it, throw it in the back, and he's not dealing with a bunch of boxes.

You've got good garbage, man. You do. You've got good garbage, man. I don't think you appreciate it because they would never do that for me. Yeah, my guy shows up at like 5 a.m., so I can't really have a conversation with him anyway. So I just burn them. I've got a thing in my backyard. It's not a burned pit like Woody has.

That would be ideal. But it's – I don't know. It's what I call a patch of concrete. No, it's this elevated steel box that has like a cover on it to keep ashes from flying everywhere. And it'll eat up a month's worth of cardboard boxes in about 15 minutes.

A month of air use? Because that's a tremendous amount of boxes. Oh, I have a real of your use because that's a yeah oh i it's i have a real bonfire out there i usually do it late at night because i don't think i'm supposed to be burning things in my neighborhood um but uh but yeah i go out there at like three in the morning and have a nice little bonfire once a month about a month i got a good i got a good i was burning boxes and uh i had this idea that I could multitask, you know, like, I'll set a big fire and then leave it unattended and get other things done. I set the yard on fire.

Our yard is like short, dry grass. And I was trying to fix my motorcycle in the stable. It wasn't running at the time. And I hear Jackie screaming like, I can't find the hose. It won't turn on. And I'm like, what is happening out there, right? Like, is there a gardening emergency? And I go outside.

It is way past stomping out phase. It is like a 600, no a 2,000 square foot fire maybe. How many cars? How many cars big? That would be dozens of cars. 30 cars big.

30 cars big? Yeah, that sounds like a lot. But it was like a big chunk of the backyard and like far cry three when you burn bushes and it catches fire everywhere all around you it's not happening so uh jackie at this point had already had the hose and started to put on the bib we have the problem with the hose babe guys work on it right now where like you almost need a tool to undo it right it you have to screw it so tight to make now. You almost need a tool to undo it, right? You have to screw it so tight to make it not leak that you use a tool for it.

And then to get it started again, same sort of thing. Not this day. This day, I just, whatever man force I had was what it took. Fucking fuck. I took the fucking yards on fire. I turned the thing on. I put out the fire, which takes a while colin is adding more tension to the environment just like screaming and observing fire and that's not

helping at all but uh it turned out when you put out the area it sort of stayed out so i just worked my way around got the edges controlled it and um but yeah now it's pretty green yard was like in the middle of your yard or was it approaching your neighbors or approaching the road or kind of isolated? It was so it wasn't a super windy day. It was approaching the pool and the kitchen and then also out into a field with much taller grass. Like we have a little part of the yard I don't mow. So it is like five foot tall dry grass. And I really didn't want that to catch on fire, but it wasn't super close either.

What if you would have done nothing? Would it have burned all the way to that really tall grass? Yes. If I had done nothing, it would have been acres and acres of fire. So what actually started it? Do you know? Probably the boxes I was burning.

That's my number one canon. It was the boxes would burn and then like, you know how like the paper gets so light, it just catches in the own thermal and lands perhaps in the dry grass. Would have been a good idea to attend it. But I was I'm so fucking fixated on this motorcycle thing that I can't do anything without being distracted by it. Yeah. I got a good one for boxes,

by the way. Go on like a legit move that very low danger. If you, if you trust your community, I just go on Facebook marketplace and I'm like boxes and a person literally come. People love boxes. People always need boxes.

So like when you got a lot of boxes i mean if they're functional workout equipment i don't know if you got like a weird long skinny box or something no but you got like boxes yeah okay yeah these ones people people will pick shit up if you have things you want to get rid of sometimes just going on facebook and be like yeah get it out of here like people will come yeah i want to do that with a stupid fucking entertainment system i've had in my garage for two years now oh my god i got so much shit and i don't want to move it and i've also got a bag of hockey stuff out there like my hockey stuff from when i was in high school i haven't put it on in 12 years and long ago the zipper on the bag broke and so for i guess over a decade now it's like sat in various

garages just rotting like a dry rot and so i just need to drag it to the curb and throw away all this goalie stuff i have a top of the line fucking water rowing machine that i bought two years ago i will never row another lick on so if anybody out there wants one of those fucking house of cards style you know electronic like display tank of water at the end brand fucking new essentially rowing machine let me know somehow we'll figure it out will you cover the shipping i'll take it yeah i'll cover the shipping absolutely I'll take it. Yeah, I'll cover the shipping. Absolutely, I will. Yeah, I'll cover the shipping and I'll sell it for very cheap.

I think I'd have to look at what it costs. I was thinking more like taking it off your hands, friends. Oh, you just want me to ship you. I will take it for negative $125. I'll take it for $2 less than whatever Woody said.

Jesus Christ. At that rate, I'll take it for $2 less than whatever what he said. Jesus Christ. Wait, I'll take it out back and burn it. Wait, is it the Concept 2? No. He said it was water based. It's got the water tank at the end. The Concept 2 is air based. I remember you bought that for

the fitness thing we did a while back. Those are not cheap. I have hockey gear too, Taylor. I bought it for the fitness thing. Now, I ended up using the exercise bike. So I have about $650 of brand new, never worn hockey equipment in my attic just waiting for, 50 year old woody to get back into ice hockey like at some point you're being unkind to your team by joining it i've also got i think i've also got about a 600 exercise bike if anybody is into that

okay if you're just you're looking to hit your cardio up all right just i'm your guy all right i got one of those. You don't like that? How come you don't like that? I feel like those are valuable right now. That one you can actually sell. Yeah, I hate exercise. The prices of all exercise stuff is up.

Well, I've got a full home gym as well that is also for sale. It was about $800. You can get that. You'll get paid for. sale it was about 800 it's one of those that you'll get paid for i i literally i had a home gym and i moved uh to an apartment and i just got back to a house and i brought my my receipt back to the gym place and i was like everything the same and he just like ran through and he came back and he was like yeah it's gonna be like 1800 more and i was like why he's like people want all of this shit now yeah so it's expensive as can be i remember this was what probably september so the quarantine was

in full swing but quite a while ago now like six you know almost seven months ago now and i ordered the adjustable dumbbell handles and I think it was like early February, like by that point, cause it kept getting pushed back like six more weeks every time. And I finally contacted them and they're like, we're bad news. We're not sending you those handles.

Like it's been four months. Like why not? And they're like, we're going under. And so, yeah, yeah. Whatever third party bullshit listing i bought this from

was just and i couldn't tell i was just quickly doing it was a company that was like buying pallets of these things and then reselling them and i guess they just didn't tell everybody who ordered it until they probably there are people still out there that weren't as on it as i was like not sending them emails that are probably like oh what are my dumbbell handles showing up it's like never dude never i was under the impression all these gym companies were killing it. And there's a place in Raleigh that sells used gym equipment. And I was like, you must be loving it.

And he's like, well, it's easy to sell, but it's hard to buy. You know, we buy used equipment and turn it over and we can't get any supply. They're, they're just stuck.

And not also for sale is the, I linked it down below the Marcy 150 pound multifunctional home gym station for total body training i'm moving in six months everything must go guys this is a great time you know uh we'll need to put the links in the description to these items this episode so people can know if you want to purchase these things because my goodness you know this is the time to put the screws to kyle he can't you know he he needs to get rid of this stuff this is a 1200 machine well then i got toys i don't know 310 i can go as high as there's a hundred dollars i'm throwing it i got i got

action figures bro pk garage sale like let's move some shit i got action figures guys you'll love them you'll love them the best boys they've been featured on my instagram i vaped in their faces you'll love it do you want to sell this to someone kyle how should they put a little lead in some a hundred thousand percent i want how should they contact you um you just join the fifty dollar discord and then you'll be able to if you really want it that'll be no problem at all if you really want it that'll be no problem at all that's the first you're getting a fucking steal it's 1200 i'll sell it for probably 600 like like it's half price it's never used don't worry like you're it's it's it's brand fucking new it's sitting in the dining room it weighs a

goddamn ton don't know what i'm gonna do with it when i move i would have bought this it looks nice if this conversation existed i move i would have bought this it looks nice if this conversation existed last episode i would have bought this i would have been like me then let it be me i just got something though so i can't now what did you get i got like uh i think it's northeastern functional it's like really extreme it's uh it's like it's got everything uh functional smith so it's like a it's a smith but like uh uh a bench uh well you just put a bench in there but you could do both um it's just really got like everything it's really got like a everything going on there nice yeah yeah i. Taylor and Woody have a good combo.

I found it. Taylor and Woody both have really impressive home gyms. In very different ways. I don't know whose gym I like more. I think I like Jim more. Taylor likes his gym more. Is your gym right behind you? No.

It's just a pull-up bar i used to what is that can i tell him okay woody has an entire room of his home that is a gym now he's got the gym flooring he's got the full giant mirrors on the wall he's got like full squat rack he's got a big like six thousand dollar cable machine um like bench press that does incline and everything he's got the full setup of dumbbells from like five pounds to what is it now 75 it just goes to 65 and then i'm going to get adjustables to do 75 or 70 and up they're all on this like nice rack because as you might imagine putting whatever that is 600 pounds of dumbbells on a flimsy like wooden rack just don't fucking work yeah so he's got a and i i'm sure i skipped

some stuff i'm he's got like pull up pull up thing and he's just got the brand new machine that i think yeah he mentioned it's a cybex bravo functional trainer it's nice um it's like it oh it's nice it's how it's really fucking nice no no it's. It's a cable machine right out of a commercial gym. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, and the other thing I really like. Oh, that's sick. This looks great.

That's what I kind of like. It's kind of like what I have. Your gym sounds very similar to mine. I don't have mirrors, though. I'm waiting. A neighbor on Facebook that lives near me said, I just moved into this house, and there's a room with mirrors all off on

the walls. I want them gone. So I contacted and I was like, if I can get the mirrors off, I want to keep them. So I'm calling up a guy to go take the mirrors out of her house and bring them into my gym. And it sounds just like your gym. I got the rubber flooring and stuff like that. I'm trying to get fit like Woody. I have an air conditioner and heater for that room. And that's like the – it's one of the coolest things in that room. If I'm working out and I'm hot and I want it to be 63 in there, bam. I have no air conditioner.

Less than 60 seconds. You got me on that. Dude, my air conditioner is OP like a car. I told him that. The HVAC guy came in and I'm like you know how you sit in your car it's 120 and then like 4 minutes later it's 60 something that's what I want

I want that temperature to happen in here I want that type of power day to day everywhere I like to work out at 51 degrees I do I would literally use it right now juice it up a little bit I'm like drinking monster my balls are getting sweaty already i'm not doing anything but i'm just getting sweaty sitting here with the lights on i would i would

turn on the ac there's two rooms in this house that aren't well they have central air but they're not dependent on it it's this one and my gym my office and my gym, any fucking temperature I'm looking for is what I get. And so it's great. What is next on the, is your gym complete now? Or are there little things? Because as I look at it, the only thing that you really don't have that pops out to me is like a pec deck. But it seems to me that you could get one of those, those benches that you can wheel around, you know,

that that'll lay down flat or like do incline and you could wheel that in the middle of your cable machine currently. And you could do cable flies seated. That yeah, I've done that already. Fair enough. Yeah. So it doesn't do reverse peck deck quite as well.

I don't know. I have to figure that out. You could do it. I'm looking at your machine. You could do that. There's room for one more machine. But I have to decide whether or not I'd rather have that machine or more floor space. Because the floor space

in itself is nice. You do your warm up there. You do your deadlifts there, etc. You're pacing around. You want space. I've seen gyms that are overcrowded. And if I were to add two more machines, for i think it would get worse not better yeah i think the space a little bit because i like like i'm just long like bending down and picking something up or even if i want to like put the weights on the side of the bench like i need i can't do tight turns like i'm long and like i like spent like two years being

fat like i can't carry weights and like turn on the dime in between things i need to like do a walk around in a slow turn like i need clearing space like a truck yeah otherwise i'm just like i'm gonna hurt myself i can't fuck around you mean hurt like an ankle or something is that your machine by the way the one that i put there is that what you have Otherwise, I'm just like, I'm going to hurt myself. I can't fuck around. You mean hurt like an ankle or something? Is that your machine, by the way? The one that I put there? Is that what you have? Or is that something else?

Yeah, that red and black one, that bottom one? No, it's not. I'll show you what I have. Oh, okay. No, Woody's is like that. Because Woody does just normal traditional bench stuff, not the Smith stuff. So he doesn't have that on there. I have a squat rack.

Oh, yeah. Mine has both. It has two bars. you just need to buy your own bar but has the smith and not because when i'm by myself and i like sometimes i'll get high and go work out and like that's when i'll like to push it with the smith because i'm like bro i don't want to die in my gym like choking on a on a bench bar or something like i'm like i'll do that i'm an idiot like i'll i'll die out here alone i need all the help that is a bad place to be in like when you're bent downstairs alone in your home gym and you're like here on a bench on the way up and you're like my girlfriend's gonna walk in on me dead if i don't finish this yeah so do you put

the locks on the end the locks on the end of my barbell? Yeah, always. Probably shouldn't. I should probably. It's just force of habit. Yeah. Force of habit. I do it.

So for anybody listening to this, like if you work out alone like Taylor does and you don't have safety stops, the only way to do bench press, especially if you're doing 150 pounds, like it's whatever. But if you're going to do 200 plus, like don't put the fucking locks on the side that way if you ever get it stuck on your chest you can just spill one side all the way down the weights will all spill off and the other side will gravity will take over and it'll just flip right off of you and you won't get you can't get hurt that way i mean if you've got three or four hundred pounds on there you can absolutely get hurt that way but like normal human size weights you dump like 300 you dump one side and then it just slams the power rack loud as shit scary bounces back down at you i i have some habits though they're like that's one of the habits that i have i i do i don't want to say like i'm ocd

but you know everyone sets their alarm on, on specific numbers or the microwave or whatever. I can be really annoying with that. And in the gym, there's like a dozen, I have like a dozen of those things gone. Like all, I'll put this,

the things on, like they need to be on. If I can't do it alone, then I'll just, I'll do it a different way. But even like, I'll like put them on, on the Smith machine. Like I just need to put them on. And then like, I go on the bench and I like take my pinkies and I do this,

like, like I rub it, like I rub them and I do this thing. And I, it's just like, it sounds dumb describing now and doing it. But like when I sit there, I don't even think, and I'm like, got to do very OCD. Well, but that's what you're doing. Like, I don't. It is. It is. But it's well, what I heard is OCD is like, and thinking i'm like gotta do very ocd well but that's but what you're doing i don't it is it is but if well what i heard is ocd is like if it gets in the way of things this doesn't get away in the

way well i mean it wastes some time but it's not like i'm like oh i gotta go back and rub the bar you know it's just the thing i do well really you're just you're still dumb i'm still yeah every time i walk in the room i flip the lights on and off 15 times now that doesn't get in the way of anything so who cares and i wash my hands. Now, that doesn't get in the way of anything, so who cares? And I wash my hands 800 times a day. Doesn't get in the way of anything. Hey, there's a pandemic going on. Sure, I've got bloody hands most of the time, but they're clean.

Got bloody hands. Sure, my hands are so cracked that they're allowing more germs than ever inside. I got my COVID vaccine yesterday. I'm so happy. Me too. I'm so happy I got it. Is it a one vaccine or you get two? No, I get three weeks from now, I go for my second dose.

But the first dose is pretty efficacious after just like six or seven days. Like your ass is kind of covered, right? When did you do the one-off? Was it not offered? It wasn't an option for me. It was either the Moderna or the Pfizer. And from my understanding, the only difference is Moderna, you wait four weeks, Pfizer, three between doses. So I actually clicked Moderna.

But when I got there, they shot me up with Pfizer. So who fucking cares? And so, yeah, go back in three weeks and all this will be over. Is there only one over? Dude, all of them them two injections except for one or are there multiple one injection ones there's only three in america so far pfizer and moderna are double injections johnson and johnson is single johnson and johnson is fucked did you guys read about that no what's up they lost 15 million doses

because some it was human error like they i think the guy conflated two ingredients maybe he put fucking mercury instead of saline solution i don't know what he did but um it's a vaccine you know why'd we put the mercury vial right next to the saline vial so uh but yeah he put in the wrong ingredient ingredient and spoiled 15 million doses of this stuff. But that is only part of the problem. The other part of the problem is that the FDA has said, whoa, this is a facility that has lax controls and a possibility of human error like this. This facility is shut down from making COVID vaccine until we are impressed that this kind of fuck up can't happen so it didn't hurt anyone it got caught in quality control it didn't go far

but uh it does hurt the effort to get millions and millions of vaccines they have multiple uh factories making it right or are they totally shut down i'm not 100 sure a friend told me they're totally shut down but i didn't read totally shut down i'm not 100 sure a friend told me they're totally shut down but i didn't read that because like i'm also thinking it was a paramotor friend oh good okay i was picturing like you know when you're like watching how it's made and it's like then they add the cookie powder to the future oreo dough and it's like the size of a civic and i was i'm like 15 million dose but i'm like, that's probably like a gallon of milk. Right. The doses are so small

that there's like, I think my kitchen could hold enough vaccine to handle America. Yeah. Like, that's not as big as you think it is. Yeah. I didn't pay attention. I didn't look at the syringe, but I think it's like, it's not a milliliter. It's like a quarter

mil or something like that. Like it's a tiny amount that each person is getting. Was it very fast for you? Oh yeah. Well, the line or like the injection, the injection. Super fast.

Yeah, dude. I, she hit me with it and I expected her to like squeeze, but she's like, bam, pal. And then it makes this like slapping,

snapping sound. And I'm like, that, are you done? And she's likepping snapping sound and i'm like that are you done and she's like yeah and i'm like what just happened like you just landed in there i always thought no matter what it was you were supposed to go real slow you are supposed to go based on movies she went fast what slapping noise i'm okay what do you mean it's the plunger hitting the base of the no it was a retractable needle so she didn't pull it from my skin the needle snapped into itself and that's how it was that's how it came out i've never had a reason i don't like that i'm mad at that i don't want noises i want a needle to be quiet like very quiet i don't have problems with needles but if needles are getting loud like

that yeah like all of a sudden there's like that snap and i was like what just like oh my goodness but it's over so i'm like like she's like turned and wrapping up her things she's like is there a problem you grown-ass man i'm scared but you're already gone so i guess i don't need to be scared anymore the funniest nurses are the ones they're going like knowing people don't expect that and doing here and like that. And they go, Oh,

you broke the needle off in your arm. I'm so sorry. Oh, what if she did that? What if she held the syringe up to you and went, where'd the needle go? I had a needle when I put it in. That'd be dirty.

You could do, you could still in your country for that. You should be able to sue anywhere if they're breaking needles off in you. My God. Yeah. I know Woody went to a Walgreens. No, we're joking about it. We're just joking about it.

Woody went to a Walgreens here in Georgia. So I took Kitty to get her vaccine a couple weeks ago. She's like, she's immunodef, whatever the fuck. So she got hers like super early. Who? Kitty. Who? Kitty. My Kitty? she's a muno whatever the fuck so she got hers like super early and um kitty who kitty my kitty your kitty yeah my kitty yeah okay great to get her vaccine continue yes and i'll see picture in my head and uh and so like it was this huge like facility, like they've like, there must have been six stations that are giving the shots. And then like one line that leads to all six. So when you get to a certain point, you all start splitting up into six different lines.

You're in your car, right? Yeah, in the car. It's drive-thru. It looked like an interstate toll booth. You know how like it's a couple lanes and then it gets real wide? Yeah. With all the tolls it was actually the garage for like this big like um power company they've got like multiple bays in the garage to like work on their their like um utility trucks so that's perfect for like splitting everybody up and like getting the vaccine in the shade that's

the one i went to the one she went to was in a, in like a parking lot, but still it was the same sort of setup four to five stations wide, or maybe hers was even six. And then like one crazy long line that like wraps around two or three blocks, but it moved quickly. I was in line for shit, probably an hour though. But the line was shockingly long like maybe a mile i think i was in a mile long line of cars i in so i live in raleigh people know and it's a blue area in north carolina this little oasis and i searched like several times a day for 10 days in a row never saw a single opening for the vaccine and i I really wanted it. Like Kyle, there's this big relief. I get to go outside. My world opens up again. And there are things I passionately

want to do. And I'm at the seasonal effect disorder and I am ready to begin my spring. I have to have this happen. I need to go. And I eventually I'm like, fuck it. I'm going to go look in Trump country. 16 available appointments that day. I can't believe this. Like, like that's all the appointments. I think like nobody else wanted it. So I just took one of those slots and,

uh, yeah, I mean, it makes sense. Those are going to be more rural areas where, you know, you're in the dense area where it's all going to be flooded. Right.

Uh, and you're going to be more not wanting to get it anyway. I would imagine. Yeah. I put it on the ladder point who knows right maybe they do have more vaccines per person in the rural areas i'm not sure no that's not it um so georgia just opened things up right so that like everyone 16 or older gets the vaccine now which is how which is how i got in line but um prior to that it was the there was sort of a system where it's

like, if they do have extra vaccine, then they'll open it up to people like me. And so I was searching like, where can I go? Where can I go? This is last week. And all of Atlanta, it's a no, like Atlanta is the blue part. Like, especially if you look at election, electoral maps, like Atlanta's blue as fuck, but outside of Atlanta, everything's red except for like maybe Macon and perhaps Savannah, like, like the major other college towns. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Athens I'm sure is blue. Um, so I, I just started searching like rural places and I was like, huh, how about like Buford,

Georgia? That's just at the edge of like what some people in this would consider it to be Atlanta. It's 40 minutes, 45 minutes from me, but it's still, you know, it's a big city. Nope, nope, that won't work. Still too blue. And so I looked at like where my family's from, like where I'm from. Oh yeah, let's go. We've got endless vaccine here at like the CVS, the ride aid,

like every pharmacy just has tons of it. When do you want it now? You just have to drive a ton to get it. Yeah. I would. And I have to get permission to drive there. So I was planning on, um, doing that, like, like getting permission to just go up there, hanging out with my dad for a couple of days. And in the meantime, like getting the shot, but then they were like, Oh, George is going to open things up any day now so i just waited and yeah got it i'm so happy i had the sniffles this morning when i woke up and my throat was just a little bit sore just a little bit when did that clear it up day yesterday maybe yeah like like like 24 hours later and i feel some like minor minor symptoms like nothing really like my nose

is a little sniffly my arm hurt a tiny bit i wouldn't even mention it but it was like a two out of ten and it actually hurt like down my side like my glute on that side hurt too unrelated perhaps i don't know but like your glute yeah yeah it felt like my this little muscle soreness on that side and uh and i didn't oh oh and on the drive home I got really tired like it was sort of dangerous fall asleep I told the story and I didn't attribute that to the COVID vaccine until I found some other people that had the same thing

an hour or two after the shot they were exhausted then it went away yeah yeah or did you take a quick nap and you're fine I almost killed myself and then that was awakening that's how that went down you know i hit the like rumble strips while driving and then i was i just drove home panicked the rest of the way that would have been ironic dying in a fall asleep car accident on the

way back from getting your coke another co excited to start my spring another covid related death yeah that would be such a rain on your parade getting the big car accident break your foot can't go out or something yeah i had like super tiny amount of soreness in my arm, like, like nothing to even speak up, but it was, I was looking for it. Right. I was, I was like rubbing it. Like, am I sore? And I'm yeah, but not really. Like, like you said a two out of 10, I think I'd say a one out of 10, like something, but virtually nothing. And, and honestly, like I would have taken an ass beating if it meant it prevents COVID. If I had to go into a room with three big dudes and tussle with them for five minutes, and then when I crawled out, there was going to be a vaccine waiting.

I'd sign up for that. Three dudes with five minutes to rough you up? I'm hoping they don't want to kill me. I got you for three minutes. My bone saw is ready. I am the cream. I'm hoping it's not the Macho Man Randy Savage. I'm not picturing three Randy Savages.

No, it is. You said it yourself. It is. He's one of them. He's in there. He's one of the three. Catch 22. It's Brock Lesnar, Randy Savage, said it yourself it is he's one of them he's in there it's he's one of the three catch 22 it's brock lesnar uh randy savage and then stephen hawking's corpse so it's really only two guys

okay okay i don't know why the corpse of a crippled man is even less intimidating well the smell you never thought of the smell you smell you bitch well that sounds like the corpse of randy the corpse of of uh who'd you say steven hawking is that yeah yeah is randy savage and yeah and randy savage was yeah he's a corpse also yeah he's dead oh yeah that still sucks i don't want i would hate brock lesnar i like your odds that's, but he's got two corpses and he's swinging them at you. He's beating you up with dead bodies.

Yeah, I didn't know both were corpses, but Brock Lesnar, five minutes alone with him. Dude, Ebola, COVID, they would all shy away from five minutes in a small room with Brock Lesnar. I don't know why I suddenly have to fight one of the scariest men who has ever lived. Because I had to keep the bit going.

Give me like a journeyman 135 pounder. Like a guy who trains, but he's like 4 and 15 in the UFC. Give me that guy. That's a lot of losses. How about Mike? Yeah, yeah. He's very popular with the fans. He me that guy. That's a lot of losses. How about Mike? Yeah, he's very popular with the fans. He's friends with Dana. Give me BJ Penn.

You don't even have to do fighters. You have to fight just two guys. Whoever the most statistically average player is in both the NBA and the NHL. Whoever that is, they're in there with you. I'll pick NBA. You'll get to pick. No, no, no. If we with you. I'll pick NBA. You know, you'll get to pick. No, no, no.

If we're picking, I'd pick PGA. You're getting PGA. Oh, I'm pretty sure I could beat the shit out of the most middling PGA golfer in the world. He's a good chance he's 62. Yeah, he's probably in his 60s or something like that. Dude's out there riding a golf cart around for a living. He's going down. Okay, well now it's not a hard challenge at all.

You're just going to beat up an old man. I'm going to beat up a professional athlete for my right to get a COVID vaccine. That's how I choose to raise funds. Everybody who goes there, it's like, man, I hated since we elected President Taylor that he's making us do this

to get our vaccines. And it's like, yeah, you have to do it. I would make it illegal to choose a golfist because that's just too easy. A tennis player, maybe, because at least they've got the cardio. Oh, gosh. I found it. I found the guy, Kyle. I don't know why I picked the 40th best golfer in the world.

Let's see. He's just yoked. It said my... He'd be a better golfer if he wasn't so obsessed with his strongman career. Kyle will fuck this guy up. Oh yeah, that guy's going down. He's going up the top. You've got to get fucked up, dude.

How tall is he? Six eight? I don't know. I doubt it. If he's not six eight, then this guy's in trouble. Yeah, that guy's getting the shit because he's 5'10". Oh, he gets to bring the club!

Oh, no! That's too much. He's too much of an expert and proficient in the club. He just needs to get a stick. But it's shaped like a club. He gets to hold a golf ball in both hands. It's a club then, I guess. He's 41. He turned pro in 1999 22 years ago

wow man that guy is it must be really good that's the sport if i was gonna pick up if i was gonna be like obviously um taylor would be a pro hockey player if he if he could like hit that wish tree up oh make me a fucking pro hockey player let me let me get out there in the ice bad choice but for me for me i'm picking pro golfer yes pro golfer you don't even get sweaty like you don't get sweaty what do you play 16 times a year something like that i mean you could play in all those little tournaments if you wanted an action and look if you just place like like i can you look at this guy's career earnings i think that that that's going to really make my point for me. I bet this guy's career earnings over the last 20 years are something like $5 million or something.

Is that how you gauge golf career earnings? That's how I am judging golf. If we're picking leaves off the wish tree and getting to be somebody. And what did you say? This guy's ranked 40th. Yeah. That's still pretty high up there. I don't like,

I can tell you this, Kyle, he earned 2.2 million last year. There you go. So he's this, this paunchy fellow is not struggling by any stretch of the imagination. Not at all. Not at all.

This guy's got an Adidas sponsorship, clearly, because he's rocking all the Adidas gear. He's got an Auntie Anne sponsorship. And he played 12 events. 2.2 million. I'm sponsored by Adidas and Chipotle. I'm living in a brass house on this one.

2.2 million. And he played 12 events. That's why golfing is so good. Taylor's picking a sport where he has to play 82 times a year. But I would rather play it. You have to travel. This guy brings home 200 grand every time he goes out on the links like come on honestly you're selling me this is pretty nice and the thing about this is like he's got so much free time if he wanted a career in hockey he could probably get on board with like some you know

he could probably buy himself a fucking hockey team like some junior league hockey team and just put himself on the roster yarmir yager style except yeah like yeah unlike yager he's not the second highest point nhl player of all time so he'd probably imagine that you buy a team for a sport you're not familiar with and you force yourself into a prominent role and you just ruin their season you're losing every face-off you demand to be out there 12 minutes a period. Just sabotaging. And we know it's the third period, so fans, the owner is now going to play goalie.

He'll switch them up. He looks exhausted, folks. Yeah, he looks exhausted. Yeah, I would pick auto racing. If I were a billionaire and I'm gonna like get a race team and like, or like buy my way into any sport, I pick auto racing. Because like, it's pricey. Well, you're a billionaire. So but but but like, no, and you don't have to like fund the whole fucking race team, right? You just have to fund enough of it. They're

like, Yeah, I guess Taylor can drive. I mean mean he can drive a little plus he paid for everything let's yeah yeah get him in the car get him in the fucking car let's go let's go just there's a first race there's a billionaire who bought a formula one team and his son's a driver but his son's pretty good that's my friend lance wait i am i being fooled yeah that's the guy no he's from montreal lance stroll is his dad uh was like made like crazy money they're worth i think 70 billion dollars or something yeah um which i knew he was well off but i didn't realize i actually have a vlog with him where i went to his one one of his like country houses or compounds. And we went pheasant hunting.

I think I spoke about the pheasant hunting on one of these episodes, actually, but we went pheasant hunting and yeah, they, they owned, he owned the, the margarita team and, or,

or whatever. And it changed. Yeah. And now it's his son is one of the racers on it. And he was the youngest formula one racer uh and i didn't know until i met him how intense and demanding the sport is um but he was like like i just never thought endurance for for racing or whatever but like that guy is that guy's exercising every single day like that guy

is like a crazy athlete and plus he's just like the type you know like competitive and like wants to be the best version of himself um he was you know he's much younger than me but i i i met him we hung out and i was just like uh i don't know it's just like inspiring you know like just kind of like obviously he he was able to join the team because of his life but those people that are given things like that either go one way or the other you're either going to like commit to it and try and like earn your keep or you're just kind of like you got it and you're lucky but it just seems like he was always trying to earn his keep with doing it.

It was also a very trippy experience being at his place and going pheasant hunting. So as a rookie last year, there's 20 drivers. He was 11th. And that doesn't tell the whole story because some cars are better than his. Some cars are worse. It's not just the driver. But yeah, he's good. So I just learned about him through Drive to Survive, the Netflix series.

You guys probably know about that. And, you know, when he, they were asking him like, hey, you know, do you expect to be on the team? And he's like, yeah, you know, I got an in with the owner. Like, it was pretty clever. He said it nice. It's his dad. And I was initially maybe a little resistant to the obvious nepotism there, but he's driving well,

right? Like in my opinion, if you're better than half the field, you earned your spot, right? That how he did, right? Agreed. You know,

agreed. Yeah. Yeah. If you're better than half the field, you definitely are your spot. Like I think in that scenario, the only time that like I'm worried about nepotism is if you're like bottom three like literally bottom three out of 20 you know if you're in the if you if you're one of the if you're one of the bottom three yeah i

think that's if he was bottom three like rookie year first time and he's beating if yeah if he doesn't come in last once if he doesn't come in last once at that point, I'm like, okay, you beat a professional racer. Yeah. If my dad owned the blues and he threw me that there at 18, there would not be a drill in practice where they're like, he finished ahead of a few guys on that. No, no, it wouldn't happen. I would be last in everything the entire time. It would be obvious. Like if I if by some happenstance, like the guy's son actually is like that guy's that guy's better at racing than Jimmy Racington.

You know, the most famous racer in all the sport. Like, of course, it looks like I got it wrong. It looks like it was the second season. So his first season is the 15th best, then 11th. And he's currently 10th. It's only been one race. Good. On the upward trajectory.

That's pretty cool. Yeah. So, yeah. I don't know. Harley, $3.2 billion, not $70. So these people are like, they're sitting at the loser table at the billionaire luncheon. What is it? It says $3.2.

How much? $3.2 million. It's his name. Where did I see a way crazier number than that? Not that that is a not insane number at all. Is it possible that his personal worth is $3 billion and his company's worth is $70 billion? That could be true. I didn't even click on the article.

I just... Dude, so the car is interesting. Yeah. He bought a team and the team wasn't successful, right? They went out of business. There was this Indian billionaire that really wasn't a billionaire, ran out of money and couldn't fund the team. And Lance Stroll's father, what's dad's name?

Lawrence. Lawrence Stroll comes in there, buys the team. All right. So the first year they take over kind of an unsuccessful team. The next year they come out their car looks exactly exactly like last year's winning car they copied it like all over they basically are just fielding last year's mercedes in a different color and the other teams like filed a i guess that's against the rules you have to develop your own car.

They found them to be legal and now they're just they have a really good car. It's as good as last year's winner. Nice. That's how I play Magic the Gathering. When Taylor and I started playing a little bit of Magic and we were talking about designing decks

and he's like, oh, so you designed some decks? I'm like, well, no, I just went and saw who won the world championship last year. And then I bought that deck. And he's like, well,

Hey, that's, that takes all the fun out of it. Winning is fun. Makes it more fun. Yeah. Yeah. Winning is what's fun.

That's how I play poker. I just look at the hands that won and then I put them up my sleeve. That just cheating I mean it's fun that's definitely the best way to just get a really good deck off the start is go to the GP or the grand tour whatever it's called I don't even know and then just copy one of their deck lists but even if you do that because I've done that too you'll like get the deck list and be like all right i got the whole thing i got the keys to the kingdom i'm gonna pub stomp with this and then you're like how much to buy the whole thing okay well we can find some substitutions here for you because it's like 710 dollars it's like all right taylor get rid of all the rare lands get rid of all what i did not find any

substitutions and if i ever find the login for that account you don't know the login for your mtg go account you and chiz were dropping hundreds of dollars in a cold war my red deck alone is like 500 i bought the red deck that won the championship it's like i don't even remember the specifics but it's like all these like little red devil cards that are like three ones and like like like you know it's a burn deck it's like all these like little red devil cards that are like three ones and like like like you know it's a burn deck it's the best burn deck money could buy that the rules would allow for magic question will that deck get not as good like does the meta change and suddenly it could change yeah and and then like the cards that you're allowed to play could even change

they could be like ah we decided that this card is just too imbalanced it won't be part of x kind of play or y kind of play but if i could remember that fucking login it'd be mostly usually what it is is that like like if kyle was playing against me obviously we're not going to be staying to format uh restrictions like i would just grab a deck and he would grab a deck and we would just play but like yeah they have to make all the sets rotate out because otherwise people will just build a handful of decks that work tremendously and will always work well and not spend anymore and so like if you want to play standard which is only the three most recent sets you basically have to be spending hundreds of dollars every couple months to keep

up and then one set will go away and it's like well now this deck well shit i just lost a bunch of the integral cards. Well, am I going to invest more into this? You know what? We're moving to a new set. Got to invest in a whole new thing. And it's like, it's addictive. It gets you.

You just want to keep building more and more decks and trying more and more strategies. And I've done this every time where like I would, this is like five, six years ago. Four years ago was the last time I was hyper obsessed with magic. And like, I would be thinking about decks all day. I'd be like in a meeting at work. Literally, I remember doing this.

I remember sitting like magic, the gathering anonymous. I remember like some, some client was talking about something. I should have been paying attention, but I was sitting like, and I was like writing out the deck list plans I was having. And I was like, frenzy devil by four. No, by three. No, you know what? I was sitting there like, uh-huh, and I was writing out the deck list plans I was having, and I was like, Frenzy Devil by four. No, by three. No, you know what? I'll drop this and come up.

Oh, interesting. That's okay. Just doing that. And then you pour all this time and effort, and you have the card up on your site, and you're like, do I want to hit buy? Do I want to hit checkout? Is it exactly what I want?

No, no, no. I need to do more research. Okay, it's a good thing I did that research because I can switch this out, and that'll be even better. All right, checkout. And then you you get it and you play like five games with it and you're like, man, this deck is so awesome.

I got to build another one. The deck building is just as much fun as playing, I think. I was so obsessed with it. When I got back from that Colorado trip, I was going on eBay. I know you've got a lot of cards and you've got a lot of high quality cards. Like every one of your cards for the most part, either has some sort of like sentimental value or some intrinsic value. But what I did at first,

not really knowing what I was doing, I went on eBay and you can buy like someone's entire collection or you can buy like just loose cards like junk cards i have thousands and thousands of like i think i own literally about 8 000 cards pk garage sale i got toys i'm keeping my magic cards we got toys yeah you should keep some product but you figured out after you bought it and i think you've said this before that like when someone wants to sell a magic collection, they take it to a card shop and say, take everything out of this collection that you'll purchase. And then they put that remaining collection on eBay.

That's exactly what I bought. I bought remainders of collections. That's excellent content, by the way. Side note, bringing your collection to a guy and having them go through it. I feel like that's like, if you got thousands of cards, I feel like that's a great content. Just live stream it for eight hours straight. I had way, way more cards

and they were destroyed in a flood at my parents' house while I was in college. I had way, way more. I had to restart my entire collection. That was God's way of telling you like, bro, you're a fucking loser, okay? Don't make me go Noah's Ark on your collection over here. You're done. And you're like, no, I will play more magic.

Your cards are gone. You're a fucking loser. Now you came back. You bounce back. God's like, fine. If he wants it, let him do it. This guy's determined to be a fucking loser, isn't he? He won't spend thousands more. he's doing it the same day my resolve is stronger than ever you can't stop me god you can't in that collection was there

anything valuable that a card that you think back on you're like fuck this could have been like a lot of money right now shit yeah i don't remember like cards specifically but i started collecting well then i feel bad now that i know money is involved the jew inside of it feels bad there was definitely viable stuff it was it was probably uh i'm trying to estimate like five to ten thousand cards i don't know of which there were two binders that were pretty sorry how do you how do you collect how do you get 5 000 how many packs do you buy or like how do you you must come across like lots of like 200 from people that are like bro i'm done just take all my cards like you don't buy all the packs to 5 000 basically like the way i always did it is it's always smarter to go online and buy individual cards if you're building a deck instead of trying to draw them from a pack obviously because then you're just going to lose a bunch of money and so i would

always buy my decks single cards and then for every birthday every christmas anytime someone was going to give me a gift for many years it was just like oh taylor loves magic cards and i'd be like yeah i love those too every once in a while you get and it's just it's a it's a treat to get to open cards because you're so excited and you don't know what's in there but uh yeah that's what i did but basically that that collection was worth thousands and thousands of dollars and it got destroyed which sucks fucking sucks it was you know those those where is this the basement of your house it's like it's just like yeah this is your house or something the basement of my parents house in what would it be 2010 or so i was you know i was in

college and i came back one time and it was like i had a flood not too much damage oh all those things you like and collect you know since 2005 they're gone so maybe your dad was trying to get you laid oh what if that's what happened your dad did it what if your dad's like yeah we had a little flood he sends you a picture like that that he's taken five minutes after he took a water hose. It's just a picture of my box of magic cards in the rain outside.

Yeah. It wasn't God. It was your own father that thought you were a stupid boy. I'm never getting grandkids with these magic cards in the mix. I remember I would go golf with him because he had an interest in golf and i had no interest in golf you're like all right i'll spend time with

my dad and go golf and like i remember multiple times trying to because before i played lord of the rings cards when i was earlier younger than that probably around like 11 12 i started playing lord of the rings cards that went out of business in like 2007 or so but it's the same basic thing basically magic but with all lord of the rings characters and a little different uh game structure but basically i was playing magic and i would always ask my dad like hey you want to play with me or like hey you want to play lord of the rings cards with me and i'm only like 12 or something and like i just remember the one time he like sat down to play we got like one and a half turns in he was just like taylor i'm not i can't do this i can't do this and he just like left and And I'm like, man,

really making me feel like a loser, dad. Like we're sitting in our basement trying to play cards and we get two turns in and I'm trying to be like now you, now Aragorn has four defense. This is before magic. I was like 13. Aragorn has four vitality and eight attack. And so you're, and so you want to play this Uruk-hai and then you attack

with him and you want to kill my ring bear but this and that dad, I remember like, like I would play with my friends and he'd like be like, come in and just be like, and he just always looks of, of disliking derision around, around the card game.

That's my dad. Now, like I'll, I'll like, I'll get like action that's my dad now like i'll like i'll get like action figures sent to his house and i'll like go there and he's like yeah more of your fucking dumb toys came in today i don't understand i don't understand shut up dad you don't have to get it but then again my dad like you know he's like like raced cars like not like actually like a racer he like they cared about cars him and his friends and they like drag race them and stuff and now i'm there and i'm you know like it's like it's similar in the sense it's like playing magic cards my dad like same shit he'd be like what the fuck and then i wonder like what what would my kid do

you know right how can he make it gay would he do am i gonna be uncomfortable about anything would i be like bro seriously you put things in your ass i can't put things in your ass with me i'm like building a hot rod i'm not entertaining to your action figures like this poor kid's gonna be into my little pony dad i like that i consider i like that i consider uh my hobby i like that i considered i considered my hobby somewhere in between uh building cars and putting things in your ass yeah it's smack dab in the middle that's right. You're just like, son, I love you more than life,

but I don't want to watch you suck your boyfriend's dick anymore. It was okay. I was there. I gave him a shot. What are you, a bigot dad? 12-year-old baby Harley. Dad, come suck dick with me. Come on. I'm just trying to bond. You know I'd name him Baby Harley.

I would name him Baby Harley. It's a good name. That's his name. Any other name would be a downgrade. Dude, have you guys seen the Matt Gaetz news? It's hilarious. I've heard of it, but I didn't look into it. So Matt Gaetz is an American politician.

He's a member of the U.S. House of Representatives from Florida. And he's been accused. He's like under investigation. I guess he's not the subject. He's something else. He's not indicted yet. Anyway, sex trafficking. And it's not as bad as it sounds apparently

he was fucking this 17 year old in florida and paid for her flight to go somewhere i have george in my head but i'm really not sure about that and kyle did you want to jump in? Is that the Mann Act? I think that the law against that was a segregation era law that was meant to target interracial couples. I don't know. I would love it if the Dems are using that against this guy. So, yeah, he's Republican, but it's not really about party. Anyway, so he went on Tucker Carlson's show. And Tucker opens up with this, you know what? I don't know anything about this case.

Well, we got Matt Gaetz on here himself to talk about it. We're going to see what he says, which I interpret as I'm going to interview this guy uncritically and just accept whatever he says as truth. Because he doesn't know anything about it. I'm like, all right, cool. So the guy comes on and his defense is fucking hilarious, right? It was never, I'm not fucking 17-year-old girls. It was always, I'm not traveling with them. This idea that I was generous towards my ex-girlfriend, first of all, what's wrong with that? Second, check my travel logs.

I did not travel with a 17-year-old girl. They're accusing me of traveling with this girl, and I absolutely didn't travel with her anyway, so there's that. And I'm like, but you fucked her, didn't you? You're not denying that part of it. It's the travel part. But that is what the human trafficking part is that he's

really so they're not going after him for fucking her they're going i'm not sure that's illegal right we think it's 18 but then we looked it up huge numbers of states have 17 as their law and then there's even some 16 i thought 16 was the common one so so here's a common case of course check your own states at At 14, you can consent to people within four years of you. So if you're 14 and the other dude's 18, check the birthdays, right?

If you're 16, then you can consent to Matt Gates if you want to. Now, I don't know Florida, but that's like a common one. So I know that's North Carolina and that's New Jersey. It's 17 where you are. Okay.

So apparently I'm guessing it's okay to fuck 17 year old girls. Maybe not politically, but legally. But it's not okay to buy him a plane ticket. And that's where he fouled up and we'll see how it plays out. But the reason why I said no. Woody, you're right. there's way more 16 in this list than i thought if anything that yeah there's more 16s than 18s in this list the reason why i said the mafia thing was because he i i heard this yesterday or whenever i think it was yesterday

uh it came out and apparently like seven hours before he had, uh, he retired from what, whatever it was that he was currently doing, uh, and took a new job somewhere else, uh, way less than the public. I supposedly some, uh,

some, some show. And he had said that the allegations, uh, against him were false and that he was being extorted. So the extortion thing made me think like just mafia just because it's extortion but like i thought that was funny that when it came out he said that he was being extorted but like seven hours before it came out he like retired from his position and i always just

thought that sometimes like the old the old he retired he was doing something yeah he had he had switched jobs he had uh i actually this is all something that i read on reddit last night stoned uh-huh so please excuse the way i'm like translating it but you could pull it up he had like uh he had uh retired as a politician to start uh to be on a show um he had like basically relinquished power is that not accurate that he had relinquished power. Is that not accurate? That he had relinquished power from his position right before this broke. And then he, it broke.

And then he said he was being extorted and he went off this engine saying that his dad is working with the authorities and his dad was wearing a wire. And I thought that was weird. Cause why would you wear, why would you say you're wearing a wire and you're working with the authorities if it's supposed to be like a low key thing? So two days ago, an article came out saying he was considering not seeking reelection and instead getting a job at Newsmax, which is like to the right of Fox News. Yeah, that's what he has.

He has not retired. And if he wants to get reelection, he lives in a state the Republican, not a state, a district where the Republican automatically wins. So assuming he wins his own priority primary, he keeps his job. Yeah. And that's politician talk. He's definitely going to run again. Definitely. Oh, I don't know.

I don't know. I think that I could see him leaving and getting a job at Newsmax. I think it might earn more money. It obviously earns more money. You think so? And then House of Rep, yeah. And it earns more money, and I think it's a better fit for him. Like, he's never introduced any new laws.

He doesn't seem that interested in governing. He's the guy that wore the gas mask. You don't think that he wanted that? You think he wanted to do that separate? You think they he wanted that? You think he wanted to do that separate? You think they weren't related? I assume that was like a tactic. You could do

much better for yourself, I guess. Not like being a politician. If you're in the middle of doing this type of thing, the scrutiny when you're a politician is so much more intense, I would assume, than if you're just on some show. But like you said, there's many reasons why it could be the right move but i always think i thought that always comes off as kind of guilty and nowadays with like cancel culture i'm always

mystified about how things are handled uh when people do shit or whatever and i you know in the old days it was kind of like don't say anything until newspapers get tired of printing but now you don't say something and the conversation gets crazier and crazier and people go farther back on your twitter and you're not saying anything to defend it and things get crazy then people start imagining stuff and looking at other things and inferring shit like you know like i think of like uh like uh chris d'alia never said anything when it went to hell uh when it went to shit for him like you know all these the allegations that came and i i remember like nothing he didn't say anything for a while david dobrik didn't say

anything when things got bad or when people started pointing out stuff um you know in in one case for chris it was like a year later, he came back and made like a video. And in David Dobrik's case, like shit just got too hot to not mention something. But it seems like people try and do the older tactics. And I feel like we're at a place with like an unprecedented strategic approach with the internet and Twitter and how fast things move. Like, what do you do if you're, you you're in a scenario where you might be cancelled for something or even if it's something actually bad and you should be or if it's something where us here would be like

that's not a big deal, they should shut up about that. Whatever it is, it's interesting to me whenever that happens it's probably my guilty pleasure is watching these drama things because I'm just like, oh, how will this person handle this type of scenario? So I only knew about this. I don't know anything about this guy at all.

Never heard of him, but I knew about this cause I was like, Oh, you know, it was like one of those scenarios, someone approaching a strategy of what to do. And so I always try and read into that stuff. So the,

the leaving his job thing, it's kind of fascinating. So I don't, I don't know if that's ever going to turn into anything. I could believe a world where house of representative was always a stepping stone to a media job. That seems kind of Matt Gaetz. I've followed Matt Gaetz for years. And so I could see that.

I could see him being happier and wealthier and better at the Newsmax job than he is as a House of Rep. But yeah, apparently fucking this teenager. Is Newsmax big? But that's a federal thing, right? If it's traveled, it's like a federal crime. Sorry. I didn't know if Newsmax is big enough to be like giving out big contracts and stuff. Are they on TV?

Yeah, they're a cable channel. Oh, okay. I don't have cable. They're growing like crazy. They are taking Fox News's market share. Now, my dad is like a month and a half old. growing like crazy they are taking fox news's market share now my dad is like a month and a half old but uh fox has been plummeting doing worse than cnn worse than msnbc worse than they've been doing the worst and it's because while they previously had the entire conservative audience

now it's being shared with one american news and newsmax yeah what we've seen like every single traditional news station by percentage has become less and less popular like cnn and fox and msnbc are the kind of weather veins of that you can see like five years ago they were all way bigger titans within this industry and like net net like number wise it might not be the dramatic thing you're thinking but the fact that they've stagnated a bit and for a while there for a couple years msnbc and cnn almost switched places because cnn used to be like the rock and roll and fucking uber successful one prior to like 2016 and then 17 18 msnbc i just know because i work in advertising so i see the the numbers and the rates they charge except the

problem with msnbc's was that, you'd see all their ratings like, and then Rachel Maddow just boom, just blows it out of the water. She had incredible ratings. This is like four years ago or now? This was like three years ago that Rachel Maddow was really, really booming. I don't know what her ratings are like right now.

I haven't checked. Probably not as good because like you said, you know, different, different companies are cropping up. And then a lot of people are moving away from the traditional medium entirely and turning to online for their news. It looks like Fox is doing better than I thought. I don't know where I read what I read. They did do the biggest drop off. They lost 40% while the other guys like MSNBC lost 19%.

Yeah. They're still the biggest. Even though they lost 40%, they're still the biggest even though they lost 40 they're still bigger than msnbc anyway i don't know if this is what people want to hear about but uh yes newsmax is growing and growing it's like okay well then that's probably the smart move money wise go there and start getting like a hannity style well not probably not a hand i don't know what hannity makes yeah harry's top of the food chain but yeah like i feel like it's a smart move too not only is it probably better money wise but also like the job that he's good at more fun a little less scrutiny a little more fu a little less like

please like me i don't know like i feel like a media job is better than a politician job but for mental health and happiness and yeah i'd rather be in the media i think you can do both. I think one transitions to the other so fluidly. Transitions, but not at the same time. You don't get to be a cable anchor at the same time. You wouldn't want this incestuous relationship where you're the governor of

a state or maybe the mayor of a city and then your brother is a newscaster. That wouldn't work. There's no way that you could get an Emmy in that situation. That would be tremendously unethical. Imagine if they put him on TV and tried to use that as popcorn while there was a huge

controversy. If that was the case, though, you would just report on your brother accurately, and of course you'd never have him on your show or anything like that because, again, ethics yes yeah yeah journalistic integrity yeah yeah being on the news you guys way better than being a politician he should do it yeah plus he might not get reelected well no it's florida they probably like you guys watch any uh

you guys watch any conservative YouTube channels? I watch Fox. I go on my YouTube and I get a lot of that. That's what I get a lot of. Not that much. Sometimes I'll click on something. Something interesting will be said and I'll click on it. That's why YouTube is really good.

What are the political changes? I know, but i don't really take it in like as much sometimes i wonder if i'm like like my youtube is logged on an ipad or something and someone else because like it's a lot but like i'll get like a lot of like it's no i know you're right you're right i wonder what uh oh there's something here about star wars is there a new one coming out and then they're like oh this, this guy loves Star Wars. I bet he dresses up as Boba Fett every Saturday and goes to fucking... They're right, though.

But they're right about that. They flood him with information about Star Wars. I wasn't right. That's what happens to me with Fox News. I'm like, all right, Woody, maybe you're an echo chamber. Let's listen to some Fox and hear both sides of the story.

And YouTube is like, this guy fucking loves Tucker Carlson. Let's feed him some more. I'm like, oh, well, that's captivating. I watched that one and that one and that one. Now I'm watching Hannity and Laura Ingraham. Go ahead. I watched two videos about Warhammer 40K because it's interesting.

There's this YouTube channel. I don't know off the top of my head what it's called. I'll actually pull it up and give him a little plug in case anybody else is interested in this shit because he makes great videos. pull it up and give him a little plug in case anybody else is like interested in this shit because he makes great videos um and now i have like multiple bands of it recommended because i watch youtube on my on my tv i scroll through it yeah this guy is um he's got he's not great at branding sorry buddy it's l-u-e-t-i-n-0-9 like luten 09 he makes these long in-depth lefty ox four eight bullshit right there or some klm five nine eight six some kind of loser doesn't understand maybe his name is

luton his name is definitely luton but like like i can't find it if i told you this guy's youtube channel luton but some of the letters are numbers are numbers. You don't even know how to spell Luton. I don't. I just looked at it and I'm not sure. Spell it. L-U-E-T-I-N. No. No.

I just spelled it out loud for you. I just spelled it out loud for you and you can't spell it. That's how hard it is to spell Luton. How hard it is is I've known Taylor for a decade now, and he's never misspelled a word. You know what? I'm sorry to ruin it. But this isn't a real word, though, right? This isn't a real word.

Hold on, Kyle. Look up how Luton is spelled real quick. L-U-E-T-I-N. That's exactly what I said. You said L-U-T-I-N. L-U-E-T-I-N. I said that. You didn't say anything.

Roll the tape back. I thought you said L-U-E-T-I-N. We're not capable of doing that sort of thing. It doesn't have to be a real word, right? I'm telling the viewers out there, crucify Kyle for this. This isn't a real word, though, right?

What is it? Is it a name? I just don't think you're a very good speller. Well, that's... F-a-l you're like Taylor's kidding but I'm a good speller it's because he's a reader

Taylor how deep are you in what book are we reading like the Slayer of Kings or something yeah I finished the first book and I'm like it was like six or seven hundred pages the first book I finished that one I'm on the second one now I'm only like 40 50 pages into that one I'll probably read some of the first book get better or do they keep telling the story as if it's someone

press shuffle on the chapters no it gets better I don't know how far you are in but it goes a lot more battle heavy and the more they go to Cal the bridgeman and that army story whether it's I don't know if you're even at the point where they're talking about the generals in that army like Dalinar and all their other guys that once they once they introduce that and the cat that and the cow story are really really good second half of the book and the second book starts with that story and I'm still in that first chapter so I'm really enjoying it what happened is someone in the patreon suggested a series of books to Taylor and I. I got the audio books and he got the printed books because he's smart.

And so I've been listening to a while driving such and he's been reading faster than I've been listening. Anyway, it tells the story of three people who from where I am are just unrelated. You're like, I don't even know why I'm learning about these three people. It bounces from one story to the next to the next and i struggle because they all have like not normal names what are their names like caledon dragon and shalon and dalinar and a bunch of like fantasy difficult names to remember yeah so that adds to my confusing names if you're a magic player that adds to my confusion i feel like that's not i'm always like whose storyline are we on now like what what am i listening to what just what happened in this again why is this book on shuffle and i am struggling to

keep up i just don't like audiobooks as much like i find myself all the time while i'm reading like i'll get a couple paragraphs down often and i'll realize my mind was thinking about something else and i'm like what did you read the last two paragraphs you don't even know bitch pop back up yeah and so I do this constantly and I am often driving but sometimes even flying when I'm listening to these audiobooks so it's only getting like a third of my attention and yeah I can add to the challenge and that's tough like with because like I think the only large book series that I listened to a good portion of it was Game of Thrones and I retained a million percent more when I was reading it. Versus when like something would happen in Game of Thrones where it's like, what?

Arya did this? We're on an Arya chapter and we're at the end? What was that? Last thing I remember, Jon was talking about the wall. And now Arya is killing someone in the Faceless Man house. I've missed a huge portion of the story. would re-listen to stuff because when i listened to game of thrones we talked about on the show and we would have like theories about what was going to happen next on the tv show and it was like i've got to be tested on this i i can't just

hope i can't like this is this is on the test i need to know know. And I'd listen again. Oh, what I was going to say before we got into that silly spelling debacle, um, from the right Warhammer. I know you spelled it right. I was teasing. So I've seen a lot of, um, I watched like two Warhammer 40 K things because I was curious about like

some of the mythology, some of the lore, and then just kept recommending them. So I was like, this guy's got a nice voice. I'm going to, I'm when I go to sleep tonight, I like to play like a YouTube video in the background, usually someone with a soothing voice, something educational. If I can, I'm hoping I'll absorb it

in my sleep, honestly. So I'll turn the TV down to like seven or eight so that I can just barely make it out. And it really puts me to sleep. I wake up and I feel so stressed out and I can't put my finger on why. Like, and I look at the TV and it's the most gruesome shit I've ever seen in my life. And I start like paying attention to what he's saying. And he's telling this story about like some space Marines or something who go to a planet and they discover where like these chaos demons have been keeping humans in pins and force feeding them through these like mechanical like tubes down their throats. And they are gigantic and swollen to the point of almost bursting.

And you can see where they've been vivisected and they've got tubes and hoses running into their, into their chest and stomachs to keep their organs going. And then they go into the next room and they see the room where they starve the people for the second after they've been inflated. They're literally sucking the fat out of them like liposuction style. And then they see all of the people who are the final result walking with capes of loose skin that they have to hold up to walk. And they're walking toward the,

the in, in like single file line, completely dead eyed out of their minds to be skinned. And they are being skinned alive and their skin is being tanned and, and turned into like some sort of fucking product that these demon people are fucking making. And i'm just like holy shit let's go back to astrophysics i like learning about black holes this is awful yeah what the hell how to get to that that's what warhammer 40k's universe is like the most horrific

thing you can imagine and it's one story after another that's equally horrific when they want to refuel their ships you might think oh but they just pull up to a gas station and they put the space juice in the side. No, no, they take these poor fucking people and they put them in this suit and the people have to carry a lead casket on the outside of the ship that's full of the energy source that nobody really understands anymore because we're 40,000 deep into mankind's existence. And it was 10,000 years ago when they invented all this cool tech. And since then, we've kind of forgotten how some of it works and it's almost magical to us at this point. Well, they've got this guy in a, in like a, a protective suit and they're, and they've got him continuously being, being like injected with

gases and chemicals to keep him going. So he can't feel pain while he makes the long walk carrying the lead casket of fuel to the engines. And as he's walking, the lead casket isn't even good enough to keep the fuel from affecting him. So his flesh is falling off of his bones. And by the time he gets there, he is barely even in one piece anymore. He's crawling and pushing the casket, and it's only the chemicals and gases that are being fed into his suit that are keeping him moving forward. And by the time he's there, they end up having to scrape up what's left of him. So every time you have to refill the engine, one person dies at least? Several people. It's never just one to do any of this stuff. Cause it's like multiple caskets.

It's make a bigger coffin. I don't think a human being could carry a bigger coffin. That's probably the explanation out in space. Everything's weightless. I think there's some artificial gravity on the whole of the ship. Look, I'm not, I don't have any answers for this stuff.

It would be a cool game. If, if like, if that's the history, I didn't know that was the history. We need a Warhammer 30k, when everybody understood how everything worked, because you would have even more advanced technology.

40k spans the gap. It's like the whole 40,000 years of human history. That's why there's so much lore. Because you can go back to when the Emperor of Man was first taking over the Earth, and there's tons of lore about that. And then you can go to like current current, current quote,

quote, quote unquote in the 42nd century or wherever the fuck they are, where the emperor man of man is like this living corpse that's kept alive on a, on a mechanical golden throne. And they have to sacrifice psychers brought to him from across the universe, the galaxy every day, thousands of souls sacrificed to keep him energized and still quasi living it is and you got to keep in mind that we've colonized so many worlds like one hive city on a planet could

have 200 billion people in it in one city and and and like there's millions of worlds that we've colonized it's a it's a really fucking dark universe they're making magic cards with those themes gonna be very very yeah the astartes the space marines are the cool some of the coolest fucking characters in all of like science fiction or sci-fi or whatever not just sci-fi but just fantasy it's it's it's because it's a real mix of fantasy and sci-fi. It's some fucked up shit. It's so fucked up. The way they travel. I'll get off this topic quickly.

The way their space travel works. They got regular engines and stuff to put around a solar system. But when you want to travel across the galaxy. It ain't like Star Trek. Where they're like, engage. And we just go to warp 8 and we just get there. No. You have to tear a hole in space-time itself and go to the warp zone, which is essentially hell.

It is populated by demons. And you travel through a hellscape filled with dark gods, demons, and tortured souls to get there and i i think maybe one out of ten times it just doesn't fucking work and you just everybody dies oh god you better hope you explode you don't want to stay there staying there might be one of the worst fates you can imagine well but if you die you're gonna go to hell anyway if you're i don't think it works that way it's it's it's this is like a literal hell this is like a place that exists there it this this is this is it's it's some dark dark stuff it's it's and and so yeah it won't be a little faster to transport through that dimension than like a normal like lilac field dimension and the in the like big capital was like i don't care if

it takes if it saves even 10 minutes, send them through hell. Could be. I get nauseous. I get a little sick to my stomach watching these videos, but they're so interesting. I try to watch the ones that have a little more of a sunny description of what's going on. Like, oh yeah,

and then there was this happy time where like of the Horus her Like, oh yeah, and then there was this happy time where like, of the Horus heresy, you know, when half the space marines turned on the emperor and invaded Earth and this and that

and five trillion people were massacred. I'm like, all right, this is much more uplifting than that other shit I was listening to. There are no happy stories is what I'm getting at.

There's no happy stories in the 40K universe. And that's all you're getting suggested now on YouTube. A lot of it youtube a lot of it a lot of it and the alien races are terrifying and there's lots of them just just disgusting evil and terrifying i'm excited to play that game the total yeah when it gets added to the magic cards well oh and then obviously yeah total war and the um you know the Vermintide sequel game. The Dark Tide.

That's a hive city that you're going to be playing in. That's one of those cities that has between 10 billion and 200 billion people in it. That's the play area of the game. Yeah, that game. Infected Hive City. All I get suggested now are... I've watched so much Jujimufu videos the last week. I'm mad.

All I'm getting suggested are videos from Brian Shaw, Jujie. What's his name? He's not suggested here, but he always is. Bugenhagen? Is it Eric Bugenhagen? The fitness guy who's funny? Kyle, you know his name. Eric Bugenhagen?

I don't know how I don't know this guy. Jujie didn't upload a video for like four months. Now he's uploading like 20 minutes of content a day. And I'm just like, alright. I love his content. I like how uplifting he is. He's just a nice, genuine guy. I like this new dynamic

of his wife filming instead of Tom. And you can tell he and his wife have a good relationship like they're they're really always a down it always seemed like Juju was kind of trying to pick him up and while that's admirable

if you do that for years in a row it's like all right asshole stand up on your own it's like stop needing to be picked up this is what this is the permanent dynamic of our relationship the idea is I pick you up and then you stay on your fucking feet not every goddamn day you you pretend your legs don't work while i drag you around that's what it turned into and some of those would be like you know oh i'm real tired today it's like are you tom this video is about juji doing 3 000 curls in a row

are you tired today are you sleepy is that is that an exaggeration or did he do 3 000 curls in a row are you fired today are you sleepy is that is that an exaggeration or did he do 3 000 curls in a day no it was uh it was a video where it's like we do an eight hour chest workout it's just eight hours and by the end he's just like you know tom's being you know that other guy you mentioned he's got a poor branding again like like but that guy is epic he's the one who guy is epic. He's the one who has that. Yeah. He's the one that has that little montage. What's the song it's set to where,

where he's just done, done it, done it, done it. What it is. And he's like, he's, he's like doing all these absurd lifts.

Like the lifts you hate the most. He's doing like behind the back dead lifts and stuff with ungodly amounts of weight. Like, like he doesn't, if you see him only lifting 300 pounds, the most he's doing like behind the back deadlifts and stuff with ungodly amounts of weight like like he doesn't if you see him only lifting 300 pounds he's curling it or something like like everything he does is with like five six seven eight hundred pounds just he'll do it in ways that look dangerous yes oh they're so dangerous what he's doing like all the titles of his videos are like, man jumps rope with the least amount of clothing while his wife films and watches. Is he the one that picks up the weight behind him? Like he stands in front of the barbell.

And I don't know how to describe this to the audience, but he grabs it. He puts it on his lower back. And then he does all these like terrible moves to get it up here. He like pumps it up his back. Getting it up. And it's like 550 pounds it's a tremendous amount of weight that he's doing that with and like even at the end like throwing a little shade at like athleanx he's like throws it down and it's so obviously real weight it just goes in that florida soil just like and he's like oh why didn't it bounce why didn't it bounce i don't know guys here's the name of

the brand look up what they sell fake maybe maybe it didn't bounce because this is a quarter of a fucking ton that i just snaked up my lower back and then did walking fucking lunges with in sand yeah it's it's so funny i predict he's gonna get hurt like and i think like i don't think that that's uh really a wild bet like like i'm thinking about making a bet with midi that the braves go farther further than the padres do this year uh he wants to bet 100 bucks on it that's a risky bet that's a risky bet betting that this guy's gonna get severely injured in the next like two years pretty safe yeah i bet every football team loses at least one game next year pretty safe pretty safe it's kind of rare when someone runs the table one time ever

i think this guy's in wwe or at least like a minor character in wwe because that's in his little bio makes sense he's got the personality for it and the body my god but like these you're these behind the back 275 pound presses it's like that's that's so dangerous yeah yeah that's my thing i'm like he has done the fitness equivalent of drinking live streams like now everyone expects him to hurt himself for a video. Yeah. He's an interesting guy and he's funny. He's got a good sense of humor.

Um, I like him a lot, but like I watch his videos for the spectacle. You know what I mean? And all his videos are like 90 seconds long. just him freaking out in a dingy garage gym it's just great i like and so many of them are like you know like flexing as hard as i can in front of an unimpressed toddler like did you guys see the Jake Paul, Ben Askren press conference? I heard about it.

So I heard about it. Yeah, that's Sigh, by the way, that you just made encapsulates so much emotion that I can relate to about that whole press conference. Just the fact that you were like, dude. So that's the type of content by the way that i live for coming into it not the side the the press conference i was a little bit pro jake paul right i didn't know i don't know this guy i don't know his content i just know he's a youtuber out there making vlogs and something about being a youtuber as a celebrity like you gotta earn it like every fucking day you know every day you go out there,

you're not Tom Cruise who works for eight weeks in a row and then takes four or six months off and then does it again. And everything's kind of handled for you. Someone's booking it. No, guy like Jake Paul is out there every day on the front lines. And I was like, yeah, yeah. You know, I hope the guy does okay. I hate Jake Paul so much now now i feel like i got to know him a little bit during this press conference whereas i wasn't exposed to him before he is an asshole he is just a dick he is impossible to like i don't know why he's popular he's mocking ben ashgren he his uh humor if you can even call it that was the lowest low low. Like, tell that joke again, and then this time I'll remember to laugh.

What's he supposed to do with it? Tell it again, and he's going to get mocked. He was just mocking him. He was making sounds at him. Jake Paul was, he's the villain, but maybe I'm falling for it. He is the most unlikable, easily hateable dick ever. Go ahead. falling for it he is the most unlikable easily hateable dick ever so go ahead so um I don't I don't watch a lot of that social media stuff you know like like like the the Instagram stuff and

tick tock stuff but um my I never met uh Jake I I got to hang out with Logan for a day or two and he was as genuine and kind and like down to earth as anyone else, you know, that we know like, like very, very nice to me. And, um, but I've never, I didn't meet his brother. Uh, my, my only experience with his brother is watching some clips of him online. And it seems to me that his goal is to be as douchey as possible because there's no way he's actually that douchey like no one is that douchey like everything from like his hair to his the sunglasses he chooses to the way he dresses to like the car he drives it seems like he's doing his best to like nananana boo-boo i'm richer than you you fucking loser why aren't you rich and like getting pussy like me fuck you you piece of shit

like that seems like his shtick i fell for it and and hey it might be him i don't know the guy i've never even like been in a room adjacent to to a room he's in i don't fucking know but that's that's kind of what i think what i would imagine because it does i can't imagine that someone like that actually exists that that's that douchey so bravo to him maybe he's a I think he's a really good actor um based on like I hit the his performances that I've seen thus far I hate him almost as much as I hate Ramsey fucking Bolton right like like he's good at it and uh Ben Askren on the other hand is like you know it's fucking funky Ben Askren like his thing is being down to earth he's very smart

he's clever he's good at uh press conferences uh he just if you were to talk to him for a little bit you'd be like oh this guy's with it he's sharp yeah for sure for sure um and you know his fighting style has allowed for that you know he hasn't been hit a lot ever uh he's he's he's uh he's a cool guy he's got a cool fighting style. And did you see his promo that he made where he's doing the Rocky IV workout? I liked it a lot. I have to believe the promotion helped him produce that. He did great. I agree.

I loved it. But I don't think it was just him and his wife out there in the snow making it. Frankly, I do. Okay. Come on. That was some pretty low-quality shit. I thought it was amazing. Maybe that's why I think this. him and his wife out there in the snow making it frankly i do okay like that was come on that was some pretty low quality shit i thought it was amazing maybe that's why i think this yeah me and you can make that in two afternoons like like like like there was nothing what in there was

impressive i mean i hear you but i like like the parts where he duplicated what so for those who don't know he made this little montage replicating the montage of of sylvester stallone working out in rocky four and if in case you've never seen that movie in rocky four he's gonna fight uh ivan drag off or whatever like like um big giant russian guy played by dolph lundgren and to do it he's gonna go to russia to train so he's training in like this remote russian farmhouse and his workouts are all like rustic, right? There's no hot, no like modern flipping tires, pull-ups off tree limbs, running through knee deep snow. There's a part, um, you know, doing lunges with, uh, with lumber on his back and, uh, you know, doing a pull downs with like just pulleys and

rope and, and bags of sand and stuff like that. Literally putting a yoke on his back, like the kind you would attach to farm animals to plow. And then there's a part in the movie where like some, the KGB guys, I think maybe, or that are supposed to be following and maybe they get stuck in the snow and he either drags their car or maybe he drags a farmer's wagon, something like that. Well, in ben askren's video he doesn't have access to a fucking wagon and he can't pull a car so he gets his two little kids in a in a little snow um like a radio flyer maybe is that what it like a little what are those a sled in a little sled and he ties the rope to himself and he's he's running with them like like pulling

them through the snow and they're throwing snowballs at him it's cute but it's like they made that shit in two days like like the guys he's like hitting gloves with like if it's the promotion we find a look-alike right we find a guy who looks like the uh the black guy that he trains with in in rocky it's not apollo creed apollo creed's dead in this one spoiler alert that happens at the beginning of the movie the whole movie the whole movie's because of that whole movie's because of that i must break you fucking good if he dies he dies oh that's the best quote yeah that's the and then and then the whole movie gets ruined at the end because sylvester sloan does this fucking weepy fucking patriotic like anti-cold war speech to like the soviet government in the middle of the rain he's like yo tonight i just realized that maybe maybe if y'all like me and if i like you then maybe we can all get along yo

and it's like i think maybe there's some bigger issues at hand causing the cold war stallone like like maybe i was the right age for that movie 13 year old woody's like rocky just solved the cold war yeah my favorite my favorite rocky i love meanwhile it really happened they'd have fucking stuck him with a polonium ball bearing and he'd have died of cancer like eight weeks later yeah have you seen that who's that russian politician where like just out of nowhere he started visibly dying from being poisoned like i think that's the guy having the death pool no no it's a different this is a they've got him locked up right now and the rumor is they are slowly poisoning him i read that recently well they're easy i mean

i'm sure they got better at it since this other guy who oh my god i can't believe i'm not remembering this story russian guy poisoned anyway on the press conference thing i can't wait i think it's april 17th i'm suddenly very interested the press conference did its job it made me hate one of the fighters taking interest in the fight i don't know how ben askren wins i don't know how he can do it i his striking is so bad and it's a freaking boxing contest but i you know what i i don't like so jake paul boxed one guy two or is he three or two but but like i was gonna say like one guy that was like an athlete and he did he did beat him but the other the other matches there wasn't enough there i i personally think like i i half agree with kyle um i'm deep on this stuff by the way this is like

the content i take in. I'm in with Kyle that he's an actor and he plays it up. But I do think an element of that is to deflect the fact that he doesn't really know how else to act. He can only do the character. This is a guy that got famous when he was like 18 or 17 and has been frozen in time as what happens with people that get a lot of fame early on. He's always been this guy. He's always been this character. So I feel like, to an extent, he's spent just as much time

in the last few years being this character as he has been Jake Paul. And I thought it perfectly hit its stride when he was challenging Connor and he was going off on Connor. And I happened to like it. And I was like oh i would love to see him get beat up by connor this would be great or or on the weird chance that jake just knocks him out randomly like it could happen a punch can get lucky i would love to see that either way i would like to see those guys hit each other i'm down for and it worked when it was

connor and he said all that stuff but now with, Ben, like you're looking at it and you're like, God, you look childish because of how this guy's being, you got to read the room. You got to adapt. And that press conference was so exactly as you said, like, it was like high school improv jokes at recess when you're in the seventh grade or whatever. Like it's like the type of things that he was saying. I was like, just don't, you don't have to keep talking you're not up there with conor mcgregor this guy's chilling man he's chilling like he actually even if you beat him it doesn't look like he really

cares it sounds like he's here he's coming and he's collecting the bag i wasn't a big fighting fan so i didn't know who he was and started looking up looking into his stuff and and everything after the fact but jake paul's been a heel and it's been looking into his stuff and and everything after the fact but jake paul's been a heel and it's been one of those entertaining and enjoyable heels but recently like once like this guy's just too chilling for me to even like it's like bro this is a real guy and you're in here like a uh like a young thug like caricatureature, like a rapper vibe. You're yelling and you're standing. And then at one point, Ben puts his hand on his face and pushes it. And Jake kind of does a little not punch hit on the side of him,

and he doesn't move and he walks away. And later, Jake Paul was like, oh, I gave him a clean pound on the side of his ribs. And I was like, that's not what happened. He did this weird slap thing. It was it was so awkward the whole thing was awkward and i love that shit which is why i'm also excited for like that youtubers versus tiktok boxing i don't know if you know anything about that but youtubers and tiktokers but i love you there's a whole picture for it and everything i love the idea of like youtubers that i don't really watch fighting tiktokers that i don't really watch fighting tiktokers that i

don't really watch and everyone's gonna hit each other like i'm happy to spend 30 on that order some pizza call over some friends that fucking hate these people and hate this content but we get to watch them all punch dude i'm good i'm good with it i want ben askren to beat jake paul so much now i completely fell for whatever act Jake Paul has going hook line and sinker I'm the mark not the smart mark the other one and who just wants to yeah I'm the rube who wants to see Jake Paul lose because he got me and I don't know how Ben Ashman can win this his striking is not that good Jake Paul looks great on a bag he looked great against uh Nate whatever his name was who was also a heavy bag

we do have a standing bet oh who did i pick do i have jake paul to win yeah i picked asker i'm not sure i lose that but i want to tough that's a tough one because i i think that's why he did the rocky thing is because jake paul's always talking about how he's got the best nutritionist the best trainer training him the best facility and he does he's putting a ton of money in and it's like ivan drago when he was like all hooked up in rocky four with all the wires and the doctors and the scientists and they're like maximizing the efficiency of his work out and like i love that video because i didn't see it until you showed me just now he's just like kind of like yeah okay well i'm rocky bro i'm lifting

wood and fucking digging snow. And he can't. He's got to be able to knock Jake Paul out, though. Like, if you're a bad MMA fighter, that's like, if you're the worst race car driver, it doesn't matter. You're going to smoke me at racing, even if I trained for months, right? Ben Ashgren is a grappling specialist. He's a very good grappler he was an ncaa champion multi-champion i'm not sure but he's very successful in college and then in his pro career he spent most of his time in the like lesser organizations he fought in one he fought

in did he fight in bellator i forget like ones you barely heard of and he did great he was their champion but all through wrestling all he would do is just sort of bend over, grab your ankles, and start the fight. And now he's in a boxing match. And it's like, well, I mean, he's been practicing boxing all this time, but it was never. Dirt boxing, no. He could close. Someone like a wrestler, you could close a space, right? Yeah.

Kyle, did I see Chael's what? Take on the fight. His prediction. It's the worst. Who is that? So Chael Sonnen is an MMA fighter. He was elite, very good, fought for three titles or something like that. And now he's a YouTuber who does commentary on MMA.

Cool. So he's like, Ben Ashgren is going to win this, clearly. He is a professional fighter against a YouTuber. And Ben Ashgren is a competitor. It doesn't matter what it is. This guy is a competitor. And he is going to bring that natural love and lack of fear of competition to this fight and win. And I think he went on to say like it could

be chess it could be this it could be he would win because he's a competitor and i'm like no no no it's a boxing match he can't win at chess stop doing that stop acting like being a competitor is gonna make him win at race car driving or chess or whatever what the fuck this is the worst analysis ever jake's jake's jake's competitor too clearly also like to be that type of youtuber even as ridiculous as it is like that guy's like competed intensely with his own brother over something as trivial as views now he's fighting for literally the respect of adults something he's never had he's like fighting so that someone like us here could be like jake paul did it though like hey at the end of the day he's an asshole but he knocked out an mma

okay you know like there comes with like that amount of respect that he's desires and that's the type of guy that chases something as trivial as views you know he's competitive he's got like so that edge i don't even buy into and it looks looks like Jake's cared for months. He's cared a lot about this. What I think there's a tiny bit of truth there is it won't be Ben Askren's first time under the lights. Ben Askren's been in Olympic trials for wrestling, NCAAs. He's been in the UFC. He's going to walk out there. I'll pretend there's a crowd.

There might not be. And be like, okay, another day at the office. This is my whatever thousandth time doing this whereas jake paul it'll be his fourth so maybe less nerves on ben ashburn's part but it's still a boxing competition and ben's not good at that so how does he win kyle did i miscategorize chiller i thought a wrestler so so you you nailed it all but but the thing is i don't know what the downside of cheating and boxing is i watched conor mcgregor fight floyd mayweather it was not clean standard boxing it was not the sweet science it was

conor mcgregor yanking on him pulling on him clenching with him took his back messing with him fucking like trying to lay on him tire him out and conor won at least one maybe two out of five rounds i think might have those numbers a little i think it went like 10 or 11 rounds he got tired okay he won several rounds against the best boxer in the world and connor ain't the best boxer in the world um here we have a very different set of circumstances but i think a similar outcome i think you've got ben askren who is going to like really lay on him clench with him a lot like they're going to be split up over and over and over and i seriously And I seriously doubt that Paul is being trained or his sparring partners are anything like Ben Askren because what do they do?

Find a bad boxer for him to fucking get a good look? What do they do? Find a current NCAA wrestler? Like, hey, you ever box? I got in a fight after gym one night. Perfect. Come on. Like, I don't know how you get him that look,

how you duplicate what he's going to be facing in there. And I think that if Askren went in there and tried to, like, look like a boxer and follow the rules to a T, yeah, I think he'd get smoked. I don't think he's going to do that. I think he's going to be all over this guy. like and look he's not gonna throw him he's not gonna he's not gonna like get a double leg i'm not saying that i'm just saying that he is going to fight a very dirty boxing match that i don't think that jake paul's gonna be ready for i agree with that i

think someone like a wrestler can close a gap very quickly like that's what you specialize in and like boxing or not like i don't think jake paul is that good of a boxer to adapt for the scenarios that he's gonna be in and i agree with kyle i feel like boxing is like uh you know a sweet science as you said and i think this guy should should be able to close the gap really quickly and be inside. And if you're inside in a boxing match, like someone's done. Like this guy's got it. He's got to be able to knock out Jake Paul.

I don't know. I feel like even if he wins, someone like himself being a wrestler, you don't knock out Jake Paul. I don't know if he really did it. Like being a wrestler you don't knock out jake paul i don't know if he really did it like i really want you to knock him out and i asked for jake paul he just needs to survive even just surviving to the end and and going and winning a couple rounds i think that's worthy of of respect to an extent you know it's a cool matchup it's a cool matchup it and it makes for conversations like this because it is such a cool matchup.

If Jake Paul were fighting Conor McGregor, we'd be talking about how silly this is, how Conor's going to fuck him up. If Jake Paul were fighting— He wanted it. He wanted it badly. Oh, of course he did. That would be one hell of a payday. I think that was a drop ball by everyone that made him take that fight. We all want to fight Conor McGregor.

That was a bad move. He definitely—they should have take that fight we all want to fight conor mcgregor that was that was a bad move he definitely they should have had that fight set up i mean jake paul positioned himself there with in a game of clout chess jake paul positioned himself there in a win-win scenario he wins if he gets knocked out he wins if they don't do anything and it looks like they're scared of him and he wins if he goes in there and and loses like no matter what he's he's gonna he was he was gonna win that but then this ben ben askren like i like i was saying before i watched the the press conference i'm like oh no you're equipped for like the showmanship of of a connor scenario and this guy's just like he looks like such an adult it really did make him look like

it made him look like a dumbass youtuber And I always hate when that happens because I'm a dumbass youtuber, but I want people to know this guy's got kids And all with the same woman. I don't think you understand who you're Jake Paul's the favorite. I didn't realize that 220 minus 220 favorite That's cool. That's just cool for him being the favorite like and um that's cool that's just cool for him being the favorite like and that's a long journey for this guy who was gonna have a youtube boxing match and now like he's being the favorite even though these aren't boxers still cool still a cool thing my books anyways demetrius johnson says he wants ben askren to win but doesn't see how that could happen uh i don't know why are we making jake paul stronger then why are we feeding him these people like like you know nate robinson and people that he's gonna knock out like why give

him more power he's carefully managing his career we're creating a monster we are he's good at it he's good at it are more people gonna watch this for ben askren or for him for him but i don't know people are gonna come with different reasons i'm coming for ben Askren or for him? For him. I know people are going to come for different reasons. I'm coming for Ben Askren, but I bet there's a lot of people who are coming for Jake Paul, and that's the beauty of this game. I bet you're in a small minority there. I'm definitely not.

No, no way. I would say it's – Look, there's definitely an A side and B side, and maybe Jake Paul is the A side, but that's not to say that the B side is, it accounts for nothing. Like, you know, the, the B side of this is strong because it represents all of mixed martial arts. Nobody who's an MMA fan would go watch a Jake Paul fight normally. And nobody is a little bit all encompassing, but the majority, I think it's fair to say of MMA fans, the guys who

bought last Saturday night's pay-per-view for example to to watch in ghanu fight they're not interested in fucking jake paul until they hear that he's fighting funky ben i'm not interested in fucking jake paul sorry what'd you well they might want to fuck him he's he's kind of cute he's cute he's a real cutie handsome man yeah yeah but uh but yeah they're not showing up to watch jake paul fight i don't know name some youtuber or tiktoker that they've never fucking heard of but they will show up to watch them fight funky ben who's this real fan favorite you know he's a guy that that joe rogan was singing his praises for years and like um i love him i love him i I liked his short career in the UFC.

If it was, if nothing else, incredibly entertaining. Was it two fights or three? I know he beat Robbie Lawler in that mad house. He beat Robbie Lawler. He lost to mass Fidel. And then did he lose one after that?

I don't recall the third one. I, the, the two that really stick out because they were both fucking like, like they're the kind of fights that I think would be good to show to someone who's never seen MMA before. And you're trying to introduce them to the sport. There are some fights that are like that. That's the third one.

Ah, that's an interesting matchup. I'm assuming he lost that. He did. Yeah. And then he retired. Yeah. It makes sense.

If you can't beat Maya, you know, then, then your rest your funky wrestling isn't going to cut it if you can't beat someone who who really should be in your wheelhouse of competitors you should beat but he beat robbie lawler and it wasn't quite yet the ghost of robbie lawler and shit the ghost of robbie lawler is going to be a terrifying fucking individual let's be real because just because of his fighting style. That was a wild fight.

Very entertaining to watch. I loved it. It was just like, holy shit, what's happening? Oh my God. What? It's got to be over. Wait, it's not over? He's coming back from that?

It was wild. It was fucking wild. And then, of course, he has that eight-second fight with Jorge Masvidal with so much shit talking. Let's be honest too. Like, like if it was five, it's only because it took three seconds for someone to come over and stop it. Like it was, that fight lasts, lasted however long it takes to run halfway across an octagon. Imagine running 15 feet as fast as you can. That was the length of the fight. That was

the length of the fight. A shocking knee to the fucking skull knockout that's going to be part of highlight reels for decades to come and you if and there had been so much shit talking the kind that makes money shit talking leading up to that it was a beautiful thing and and i felt awful for robbie but i felt great for j Jorge because I like them both. I stopped liking Jorge. He lost me. He's been dodging too many fights. He wants Usman again.

He wants him again. He's getting it. Usman, you think he can handle Usman? He can't. He already lost every round. The Argentinian left Usman? We don't know. Nigerian, but I'll work with it.

Is he American? Is he not? The Argentinian left, Usman? We all know him. Nigerian, but I'll work with it. Is he American? Is he not? Probably Eastern European or something, right? He's Nigerian. He's a big terrifying black man. Is he the Nigerian nightmare or is that in Ghanu? I think it's Usman.

They're both terrifying men. They could both be Nigerian nightmares as far as I'm concerned. I believe you. I was just, Usman sounded like a Bosnian contractor to me. He looks like an African contract fucking killing guy. He's a terror. Nganu? That sounds very African. I would guess African.

Nganu's first job was like the salt mines of Nigeria or something. Emerald mines. Like he literally worked there. That is not part of our language. I had something in my teeth. Everyone thinks that my name has the K at the end, but I just had something in my teeth at the press conference.

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That was, you know i that wasn't even a read that was just from the heart taylor oh i'm sorry is the read done yes sir what do you watch on youtube lately what is the algorithm pumping into your head recently my algorithm mean, it's funny because my algorithm is a constant trickle of 18th century cooking. There's always a couple, at least one of those suggested because I watch, I love that channel. I'm not memeing. I really do love that channel. Jujie for the couple months that he was kind of out of commission. I was watching Brian Shaw's channel a lot. I was watching Larry Wheels. He's really good.

That dude's yoked out of his mind. Who else? A couple other big guys. Robert Oberst, who's the guy, his claim to fame, strongest shoulders in America. He's the guy who says don't deadlift if you don't need to, unless you're practicing for the deadlift. And I've been watching –

Is it hygiene issues? Why does he always look so bad? Does he? I think he just looks like a sweaty dude. That beard is not flattering. Oh, no. I guess not. He's mega fat.

He's like the Danny De devito of strongman competitions like it like are you trying to look your worst always i don't i mean he clearly is playing in because i think one of his like shirts that he sells is said like as like strong and pretty and maybe he's playing up the fact that he's a very ugly man but he's also he's tall enough and wide enough that like he can look however he like with his nasty ass beard he looks like a viking warrior like like right off of the the planes or fucking boat wherever they're fighting he looks like he just stepped off that he's huge like i feel like you get a lot more leeway on your disgusting hygiene when you're also like six foot nine you're so impressed with

like like this imaginary dude if he's in a sword fight i don't even know that he wins if he knows well i mean he probably doesn't even know how to swing a sword not like me master bladesman i've been studying the blade since the beginning i've been studying the blade these i've been studying the blade taylor've been studying the blade Taylor, the blade of the Midwest, of course. No, I think that he looks more like a battle axe man or maybe a

war hammer kind of guy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I don't think you would toss him Gimli style, but he does look he has a very Lord of the Rings dwarf face like like very round, very fat. I empathize with you there, man. Can't do anything about the Rings dwarf face, like very round, very fat. I empathize with you there, man.

You can't do anything about having a fat face. But his is like strongman fat face. Ever since I've been a young boy, I've had very, very supple cheeks. But his protrude. He's powering so many calories into his body every day. He just appears to be like trying to fail almost with regards to, he just doesn't look his best. He looks his worst. And it,

I like every time I see him, I'm like, did you say him? What is harsh? It's so funny. This is a thought. I'm harsh. This motherfucker.

What is like, are you even fucking trying? Cause you look like, you look like the strongest homeless man that ever lived. Imagine a motherfucker that wakes up every day and combs his hair with a balloon. How much garbage do you have to eat every day to get your macros? Just like, wicker, wicker, wicker, wicker. I'm a trash man.

He combs his hair with a balloon. He roughs up his fucking unkept beard. He's 100 pounds overweight and body fat. Well, but that's not fair when you're talking about strong men. Like they, you know. All the other strong men are losing weight. Brian Shaw's getting fitter. Thor's looking fitter.

They're fighting. They're getting ready for a fight. It's because they're like semi-moving out of the strong man sphere. Well, they look good for it. Yeah, he does look way better. I obviously followed Brian Shaw's channel really closely and like first of all him laying in that what's it called dexa scan where they do that thing in that machine it's like they should have taken him to like a horse farm and let him use that it was absurd how like and he's such he seems

like such a gentle giant where he's like i don't know if i'm gonna fit in here and it's like oh he's playing it up to be and it's like oh oh no he he really might not fit in there and the results like the guy lost like i don't know 30 pounds and it said he like gained body fat he clearly didn't he clearly clearly didn't this dexa scan is inaccurate because he doesn't fit in the machine yeah and it was like he was too kind to point that out, that they gave him an inaccurate DEXA scan. He didn't want to tell everyone. That's obviously what happened. And I'm also being suggested all the strong man and like juji, like grip strength stuff, because I've been watching or I watch the show on stream, actually, Taylor Merck on Twitch, called The Strongest Men in History. And it's these guys going around doing strength challenges from like olden days where it's like this guy in the Old West lifted a horse over his head.

And it's like, well, that's clearly made up. We're going to do it with, I don't know, what's reasonable, 700 pounds. We'll do. And then, of course, like Eddie Hall's like, you Someone find a pony. Yeah, you think 700's pretty challenging? Really? I expected more from you, Brian. And it's like, okay, 900. Oh, really?

Okay. Sticking with three digits. Interesting, Brian. They talk shit to each other. Like, the clip of Eddie Hall standing under the, you know, obviously, like, the two stands where they have the barbell on it, and they put 550 pounds on it and he with his arm like this

gets it up off both sides. Single arm barbell press. Only got it like an inch on either side of the arm. You don't do those? 550 pounds. That's pushed at one for me. Yeah, it's a mind blowing amount of strength to do that. It's so cool. I saw a clip of them and maybe this is from that same

show. It would seemingly have to be. But they're all at this diner in, I think, in England. And there's a part where Eddie Hall has to take a shit. And they won't let him out of the booth. They're keeping him in. They won't move. And he's just like visibly uncomfortable he's like no no i really really i i have to take a power lifter shit you don't even understand

like because god knows how many calories he eats a day they were eating a meal like like the they were right in the middle of what had to be a 6 000 calorie meal Like it involved multiple ice creams and like half a dozen burgers and a pile of nachos and fries and shit. Like they were eating more food than a normal man eats in three days. Yeah. Each one at once. It was cheesecake. They were eating multiple slices of cheesecake each. And I don't mean two or four, like they had like five slices of fucking cheesecake each and i don't mean two or four like they had like five slices of fucking cheesecake each and ice cream to go with it or something like that it was i remember the senior talk they they all got like i remember watching it because they all got like a full pound burger in front of them but then there's like a plate of ribs and wings and they eat for probably 25 minutes before like all those men are like all right you guys want to start on the burgers pretty excited

i've been looking forward to the burt and it's like how are you not just vomiting oh yeah because you're six nine and you weigh yeah brian's really slim now he's a svelte 400 pounds you know just i just that's what i used to most of you recently i just love these strongman channels i used to hang out with uh like a guy that was doing uh bodybuilding competitions and stuff and i'd hang out with him on sundays and we'd eat like pigs on uh watching football this is like way this is like 12 years ago um and he'd come over he was like one of the biggest guys at the gym and he was going to compete and we would order every single sunday it was like everyone chose a place that they liked so like i always chose Domino's and I would get like the breadsticks, cheese sticks, pizza.

My cousin would get this place Dagwood's, which made like 12 inch subs. And they would have like a party platter with a whole bunch of six inch subs. And we would do like, you know, three places like that and wings. So we'd have like sandwiches, wings, pizza, and we'd eat like crazy. But the difference was the guy who was competing, he came with like his own food first. So before we ordered and we were figuring out what we were doing, this was his Sunday. So it was like his carbo shock day or whatever the fuck his plan was. And he ate like a double Big Mac, supersized fries, the McChicken on the side.

He had a big-ass milkshake. Then our food would come. Now he's eating with us. And I'm like destroyed. I'm like finished. And I thought I was a bigger, I'm like destroyed. And then he would go upstairs when he was done. All the food's cleaned out.

You go upstairs and come down. And he had a pie. And I always thought the pie was the funniest. And he'd eat this whole pie. After all that, and then he would sit down close his eyes while we're watching football like and it's like the first games aren't even done and he would sleep through all the second games and we like and he just grew i'm telling you bro we'd look at him be like yo he's growing he's growing and he's just there like this and i swear to god in his sleep he was growing and it fucking i love that i love i just love

everything about that i love all the the workout guys i was listening to you guys when i was doing my thing and uh i had to eat something real quick and woody by the way you fucking roast like i don't know what you were talking about but i was listening and you were like he just looks terrible is he trying i thought i was listening he's talking about this guy i'll link the channel if i was going to own a restaurant it would be one of those like um stoner restaurants that we ordered from in Denver that one time. Their whole menu had cutesy names that were marijuana names for all the food. All their food was perfectly created for people who are stoned as fuck and have the munchies. Nothing was healthy.

Everything was over the top and silly. I remember we got these milkshakes that like fruity pebbles in them it was like fruity pebble milkshakes and just everything was ridiculous it was so good so i i had that a weed a weed fruity pebble uh weed dessert at la there's a restaurant in la where they give you joints and you smoke at the table and they bring you food and they had like a fruity pebble dessert thing but you know sometimes you get high and food that like on other highs or other scenarios you'd be like that would be so good but sometimes your high just doesn't connect or you're just maybe like you get high and you're too freshly high you're like more scared about life than you are hungry so you can't think about eating and like she came by she was like the fruity pebble dessert and i was like just scared that a waitress is talking to me i'm like that and uh yeah anyways the person

next to me ended up getting the fruity pebble dessert and i was like and then when it comes and you're hired like oh let me get a taste of that and it was fucking good it was good like i was blown away i was i like savory stuff when i'm high like like i'm i'm not so much into desserts like i would never like just kill a pint of ice cream or a gallon ice cream salty treats though uh but like pizza and tacos and nachos and like french fries and stuff like that like that's chips take over cake like like anything that comes in a bag and isn't good for you macaroni and cheese like like all that's the kind of shit that i want if i'm high me too i like i don't always

i like a good like i love hamburgers and sandwiches like when i'm high like you bring out like part you guys have party sandwiches yeah it's like a weird okay yeah party sandwiches bro like that's type of thing you bring and i'm like i will fucking dome the whole box instantly like i stopped thinking and then i get this weird thing like i'm like i like sometimes i'm high and i mean like i eat fast i'm like i know i'm rushing i know i'm eager but i'm not consciously thinking about i'm just like eating fast and like i'm just like do you guys do mushrooms i have and it went poorly yeah kyle had it is a weird drug some type of drug that like makes you look at your number one best friend and you like feel awkward around them if it's not like if it's

just the vibe is weird you could look at someone like i've had someone who i've done mushrooms with and like i left with like we were like three best friends and we left we're like yo we're never speaking ryan again was that fucking weird we were like yeah man he saw his face on on the bed there on the couch he was like making that face i was like i hated that face and like now we're done with that guy that's it we're done you know but that's also doing it like 18. Do mushrooms make you hungry or no? They can. They can. The thing is, I smoke weed during it at the same time, so I guess I'm all...

Yeah, that's a contaminated experience. You don't know if it did that. Yeah, I've contaminated the stream, so I don't know. Does that make it worse? But that's... I don't know what weed does to it, but eating toned it down. That was the way that I was able to come down a little bit is when I finally ate some food.

That time I took those mushrooms and had that nightmare experience. Do you think it was the food or the fact that time was passing finally? Man, I didn't know what I was fucking doing. I had done mushrooms before, but I was so afraid of them because it was a new thing that we almost like micro dosed the amount we had it was like me and a girlfriend and like i think maybe we had an eighth like an eighth of an ounce and like instead of splitting it we each just ate a little and nothing really happened so then later on like the next day we ate what was left and what was left was only enough to like make colors pretty

which i think for a lot of people would be like, yeah, sounds good. Colors are pretty. Now we went to a park. The greens were so green. It was, it was actually scary. It was actually nice. Um, but it, it wasn't the experience that I was going for cause I wanted something new and something powerful.

Um, so like two years later I'm with a different girl at my house and she's got either she got them or I got them. I got them. That's right. I remember now. And I got again an eighth of an ounce. But this time I ate the majority of it and I gave her, you know, whatever she was willing to eat. But I ate the majority of an eighth of an ounce of mushrooms. And then like some kind of a fucking moron we went out i drove us 20 minutes to like go to dinner and and like i still to this day can't fathom why at a restaurant like oh the waitress coming over your table and being like are you okay sir do you want a drink oh you have no idea like i'll go through this quickly.

That's terrifying. I'm driving down the fucking interstate, and the road is stretching like a rubber band in front of me. It's being pulled away from me. Yeah, for sure. Dangerous. Yeah. And then I get a text message from Kitty,

and she's like, hey, will you pick me up some carrots from the grocery store? And for some reason, I should have been like, nah, I'm fucked up. I can't be going to extra some reason i should have been like nah i'm fucked up i can't be going to extra places but i was just like destroy the one ring like yes she might as well have been a fucking mordor like so we go into mordor aka walmart and i am freaking out man like i am i am inching closer and closer to a panic attack and i have actual like panic attacks like i'll go unconscious if i don't have panic attack. And I have actual panic attacks. I'll go unconscious if I don't have water to throw in my face. Panic attacks, like full Tony Soprano panic attacks.

I feel it coming on as we're standing in line at Walmart. So I start making my way to the bathroom. I know if I make it to cold water, I'm a-okay. Throwing that in my face is just like flipping a switch for those, for me. I never made it i passed out face first into one of those carousels they hang sunglasses on at like department stores wake up and i'm surrounded by a crowd a crowd there's a retard that must have been hilarious for anyone watching you're like like banging no it was scary they don't know

what's happened to me no they absolutely knew you were on drugs they did not they absolutely did not they they didn't they i was like oh my blood sugar got low i'm diabetic and so you're dilating and then do you see that crackhead do you see that fighting the glasses case i had my sunglasses on so they can't see my eyes. So, like, I wake up. I'm surrounded by a crowd of people. Someone's getting me, like, a Gatorade or something out of, like,

one of the coolers that's there when you check out at Walmart. Three Gatorade. And, like, my lady friend comes over, and she's like, come on, we're getting out of here. And some chick in the crowd is like, he's got to stay. He's hurt. And she's like, I'm an EMT. He's he's hurt and she's she's like i'm an emt he's coming with me and so i'm like thank was she yeah and so that would be a sick mushroom

lie sometimes your brain right you just get creative as fuck and you're like good call you're like i don't even know how i came up with that what a sweet mushroom lie we get to the door yeah just like you lied on shrooms you're just like on cruise control sometimes we get to the door and just like you lied on shrooms. You're just like on a cruise control. Sometimes we get to the door and there's cops and an ambulance there. And like the, and I walked past them of course. Cause like, I'm all good. And the cop,

like, I guess the crowd was like, it was that guy. And the cop like catches up to me and she, she's like, Hey, why are you walking away from me? And I'm like,

you're here for me. Like, like what did I do? She's like, they said you fell. I was like, yeah, I fell. I was like, yeah, I fell. My blood pressure, my blood sugar was low. I didn't feel well. Am I in trouble for falling? Like, I didn't break anything. She's like, well, I guess not. You sure you're okay? Like, she's kind of thrown off by this. I'm like, it's working. It's working.

And like the ambulance, the EMTs are there like with their ambulance and uh and and they come up and they're like where's the guy at and she's like apparently this is the guy and and i'm like hey guys how's it going they're like this is the guy i'm like yeah i'm all good i got i got a little blood sugar i just need to go over there and get some barbecue and they're like sounds good to me i like the ribs and i'm so we we fucking go to the barbecue restaurant eat barbecue and uh i just remember the girl being like can we go now and me being like i think i'm still too fucked up to go um i'll be right back i'm gonna go to the bathroom and look at my eyes so i go in the bathroom i look and i'm all good my eyes look normal now okay lucky

come back to the table and she's trying to play it cool not to stress me out anymore she's like so i saw they got blueberry pie and i'm like we're going fucking home she's like oh thank god closes the menu throws it i don't really want blueberry pie i want to get the fuck out of here and when we pulled into my driveway i've never been so happy in my life like there was this moment of like all the stress leaving and this pure happiness. And, and it wasn't just relief for having like gotten out of this nonsense. It was also part,

partly from the mushrooms. It had to be because when we got into my bedroom, we just sat in bed and hugged each other and laughed and, and just, just were so overwhelmed with happiness and relief and so much oh that you're like we're alive and you know i'll never it was i can't tell you even now why i decided to go out um i i i really it doesn't make sense to me you're a mushroom here that's why you made a mushroom decision like Like, yeah, let's go out.

I wasn't high when I made the decision. I was sober. And I don't understand why I made that decision. I really don't. It's so stupid. Huh? Had you done shrimps prior to that? Like, did you know what to expect kind of or not really?

Well, like I said, I had done it like a couple years prior, but not enough. Only enough to like make colors interesting. And I wasn't driving back then. I was just being driven to a park to enjoy the wilderness. But yeah, stupid doesn't begin to explain or define what I did that day. Reckless, foolish. I completely regret it. It was an awful thing that I did.

I mean that. I feel stupid and embarrassed by that story but it is funny i'm glad it is funny you know somebody will get embarrassed by that shitting story in my ex's house it that makes my teeth i think yours is worse frankly it's it because like i'll never see those people at walmart again oh i'll never see these people again yeah but they they know who you are and they do know who i am like they're they're sitting on their couch right now watching this going like yeah he fucking ruined the foyer i didn't ruin it it was hardwood at least i mean i can imagine a little bit of my shit got under the the molding at the bottom or something this fool goes into one of

those like half bathrooms to take a shit at a girlfriend's house and it overflows shit all over the floor and into the hallway. It was the most humiliating. I guess I was 17, senior year of high school, so like 12, 13 years ago. I wanted to kill myself

for at least a few years. Her dad was mad. It wasn't even her dad. Her dad was mad. Her dad was mad. It wasn't even her dad. Her dad was like a kind of passive guy, wasn't very involved. I remember, what was it? The first Star Trek movie came out in like 2008, 2009. So I was a senior in high school.

And every time I would go over there, he would be watching that in their living room. Every single time he was watching that Star Trek movie again. He obsessed with star trek loved it but yeah he wasn't the big one it was when i shit and it flowed out of the bathroom into the foyer his mom or her mom rather yelling like there's shit in my fire and i just i can i that whole scene there, I don't, I would be hard pressed to find another memory in my head that is as cringy as, as well, cringy, but also like fortified. I can see the tile. I can see the toilet. I can see the pictures they had hanging on the wall in the foyer. I know exactly where.

You know why, right? It's because you have traumatized. It's because you've dwelt on that memory so many times. You've pulled it up and replayed it because that's how memory works. How many times have you replayed that? I mean, has there been times late at night, your head on the pillow, trying to get to bed,

and that comes up and you literally audibly go, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. Get out of here. Get, go away. Nope, nope. Or you're like hanging out with like a friend or something and you sit there and just you think about it and you're just quiet you just kind of go like fuck like remembering and they're like what you're like nothing nothing but in your head you're like reliving yeah yeah that happens sometimes i'm just like oh my god it's Someone's like, what? You're like, I was embarrassed once.

I went to a girlfriend's apartment when I was like 18 and like took a really smelly shit in her bathroom and there was no like aerosol spray or anything. And I knew that at some point someone smelled the bathroom and it was like, it was, I did my best to like make it not smelly. Like, like as the shit is falling out of me into the water i am actively flushing you call that a prison shit by the way that's how you do it in prison as well but in prison they've got those like industrial aircraft toilets that'll like flush instantaneously over and over and over so as i was making it out of

your asshole you were flushing like it's being drawn like a... It's being drawn out of me. It's being drawn out of me like a cat with a ball of yarn. Just fucking yanking the shit out of me. And still, the room smelled. I think I maybe even struck a match. I remember striking a match, but that didn't do much for it. And I just remember thinking like, I hope she doesn't tell her friends. I hope they don't know I've got smelly poops. i hope they don't know i've got smelly poops

dude i just i just had another embarrassing memory pop into my head this is my oh god this is my freshman year sounds good already this is my freshman year at college and i was in some uh some class. It wasn't a very large class. I don't even remember the subject. But the teacher, this nice lady, middle-aged lady, was like, hey, I'm having a get-together at my house. Everyone in the class can come. It was only like 20 people in the class, very, very small for a college class.

And maybe it was like ancient history or something. I don't remember. Some kind of civics. And so I'm like, okay. She was like, this isn't required, but you'll get extra credit, you know, if you come. And I was like, boom, you know, I'm doing fine in this class, but extra credit is always great if I want to slack off in the future. And so I go, it's probably like 11 of the 20, 25 people in the class there. And she has one of those kitchens and we were sitting at her kitchen table. And then there is a bathroom attached to the kitchen right like very very close like another

half bath i go in there i just pee because i don't have to poop and then like as i'm standing there like washing my hands i like like i have one of those reverberating farts that is like i just and i was in the bathroom. And so I was like, I feel safe. I could just let loose with the fury of, of get it out, get it out.

And it was, it was so loud that I start hearing the people that are there laughing outside. And I was like, I once again, once more, the horn, the horn of Helmhammerhand will sound in the bathroom.

Dude, I have not thought about this in, what is it, almost over 10 years. You actually just gave me one, actually. I remember. Oh, going up to the kitchen table was so embarrassing. On the set of Video Game High School, um i have played a role and there was a whole bunch of extras now there was like these this setup where like i had my changing room but then there was like this room for extras and uh like i remember like walking with like a bunch of people and i was like talking to them and i was like oh yeah hey this is me

and they're like yeah this is us and i'm like sure i get into my room close the door behind me and then i just exactly like what you said like a reverberating fart like a braps a pungent braps like i should push the horn you know and i'm like yeah you know like i'm like that's a good fart you know um and then i'm like taking the shirt to get ready and i turn around and that's when i realized like i look up up, there's no, the, the, the wall doesn't reach the ceiling. It's just like open. It was so weird. I was like, look up.

And I'm like, what is that design? And now I didn't get the, the laughing that you got. I got something even worse. I got like, did you like whispering? Like they're whispering like they were being polite being like did you hear that and i heard the wisdom and i was just like oh fuck well whatever i mean at that point in life anyways i was like i don't know i guess it didn't matter i was like i if any like it's not the it's not like i shat on their fucking foyer floor or anything.

One thing, one thing I was always, one thing I was always really careful about was when you're mic'd up and you, and you go to the bathroom or something to turn that motherfucker off. Because like, yeah, you don't want to come in the corner like that one guy. Like, yeah, I've been mic'd up a lot. Right. I'm sure you have too. And like, you know, we, sometimes we'm sure you have too and like you know we sometimes

we just be in the field and like my cameraman has like one ear on all the time so he's always got me plugged into his ear so if i walk off like even even i'm gonna fart i'm just like this thing needs to be off unless i am talking so i it's it always was off like a lot of the times you'd be like you have to you'd be like, turn your mic on. I'm like, no problem at all. That's a whole lot better than me shitting in your ear. How can you turn that mic off? You're shitting.

Yeah, there's been a lot of times where that would happen. You get mic'd up at the very beginning of the day and stay mic'd up all fucking day long. You also have to be careful if you walk off and maybe you're a little miffed about something like you don't want to talk shit about somebody like like potentially and then have them be like am i really an asshole like come on man like i'm sorry that was that we're supposed to hear when i when

i was like nine i'm remembering this I was playing baseball and I hated baseball. You know, I was younger than that. I must have been like seven because I wasn't that into hockey yet. Once I got into hockey, my dad got more accepting of like, OK, he's going to play hockey. That's his sport. But I was terrible at baseball and soccer. I just had no interest. And I was like up to bat once.

And I had been telling him like since I was like three up to bat, like, I've got to go to the, I got to go poop so bad right now. This is one of those, like, you know, it was a grade school where it's like schools up here. Then there's like a different field and then kind of a dip down below and then the baseball diamond. So it's, it's a bit of a jog to get into the bathroom. And I kept telling him like, I have to, I have to go to the bathroom. I have to go to the bathroom. And I think in his head, he knew he knew i hated baseball and he was like this kid's trying to get out of batting so that i lose interest and he doesn't have to play baseball anymore and i think that's what he thought and so i went uh i went up to bat and i hit it all right enough for maybe a double except i got

to the second base and because third was on the side of the school, I just ran through third, didn't go home, ran all the way in and shit. And I don't remember how they managed that score or something. They probably just put a different shithead kid on third base for that. But, yeah, he believed me. He believed me after that. I was playing – this was in a tournament, and I think it was Detroit when I was like 16 playing hockey.

And me and the other goalie, me and my backup goalie, both had the flu. And so one game, thank God it was towards the end of the trip that we got sick. There were only a couple games remaining. And he and I had to keep switching back because I started the game. I remember us both talking before the game. I was like, Adam, you know, it's a 10 game tournament whatever it is i've already played eight there's only two more can you can you step in for me man he's like i really don't want to man i'm like but you you better be fucking ready if i skate off because that means i need to take a shit and so

i like start the game i get maybe like four or five minutes into the first period and like a whistle happens and i'm skating over to the bench so fucking fast like adam you're in you're in adam i'm getting off the coach like basically told us he's like i know you guys are both feeling sick you handle this however you need to handle it you know we'll try and keep our forwards and defensemen keeping you safe as if that means anything the other team's not helping so you know we switched i think four times throughout the game because then i came back and I wasn't about to jump back in the game. I wanted to sit there and feel sick. And so I sit there and I let him, like, grind out, like,

till the first is almost over. And then he starts skating over, being like, I got the hot snakes! I got the hot snakes! And he's just skating over and then I have to jump back in the net. It was, that was the worst game of hockey I ever played. I was telling him how Woody, when I was maybe 16, 17, I was playing a tournament in Detroit and the last two games of the tournament, me and my backup

both had the flu and so we had to like and it was like the stomach like shitting flu and so we were just switching back and forth. They should have made a rule like you can't switch a goalie every nine minutes. We have to. With every other position. That was the thing. Roberto Luongo, one of the

best goalies in NHL history, there's a clip of him where like he's just in the middle of the thing. Roberto Luongo, one of the best goalies in NHL history, there's a clip of him where he's just in the middle of the game. They're like, Luongo's skating off quickly. What's going on here? Not sure, Adam.

What could possibly be going on there? And the afterword is like, yeah, I had to shit so bad. It's like, no, you just left the game against the Maple Leafs because you had to shit.

Is the backup goalie ready to jump? Like, every other player is always instantly ready. If you see your guy come over, you kind of know it's your turn. But even if it wasn't, as the backup goalie, can he just throw his mask on and get in and do like a shift change? That's what we did. He didn't play that much because, frankly, I was better than him. But games that he would play, like, I would always pray, like, please do well.

Please don't get pulled. Because there was nothing worse than middle of the second period. It's like, oh, your goalie's getting fucking hammered. He's out. You're in. It's like, oh, awesome. I'm cold. I've been sitting here.

I'm tight. I'm not ready to play. Other team's on a roll. Yeah, the other team already has momentum. You really want your goalie to take a few shots in the beginning of the first to build confidence. You don't like backup. How long would it take you to get ready to play?

Can you just throw your mask on and get in? Uh, I, I never played backup on a team. I was, I was the starter on the backup. Even the starter doesn't play. Oh yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Like holding it off. Yeah. It was, I would want, uh, like between two and four shots and i'd be like okay i'm feeling good like if there was a breakaway and i saved a

breakaway it's like all right boom i'm in the fucking game like i'm ready to go if it was just a bunch of point shots then it kind of takes you a second to get your angles carly by the way you look like the most you look like you're going're going Halloween as a hockey player right now. Like you look so hockey-ish, not just the Canadian. The backwards hat. If I put my hat on forward, I feel like I look like a retired baseball player. Let's see it.

If it's on forward, it's retired. I see it. I see it I see it you look like a picture for the fucking expos if I do this if I do this I'm racist pedophile yeah that too

if I do this I'm racist you know what I don't think that's fair I don't think your mustache screams racism it's more the mullet yeah yeah it's the mix it's the mix You know what? I don't think that's fair. I don't think your mustache screams racism. It's more the mullet. Yeah, it's the mix. Mullets are going to come back. I think they're kind of back a bit.

I think they're kind of back. Some people literally just banned mullets for their players. What? Yeah, I saw that the other day. I didn't look too deep into it. Let me get the nitty gritty on this. That's a good question. That's fucking dumb. What did Kyle say?

I missed his words. He said that they banned knowledge for a school. Oh. Why the hell would they ban a hairstyle? They said because they deemed them unacceptable. Let's see. Salt Lake City. I might be siding with the man on this one.

Oh, is it Brigham Young? Trinity college in Perth, Australia is a school for boys. Um, and they, uh, in their newsletter, the school stated the current trend of growing the hair at the back of the head and or closely cropped at the sides of the head to accentuate the quote unquote mullet style are, are untidy, non-conventional and non-acceptable at Trinity college, as is the trend of long hair and fringes. This is fascism.

Yeah. I think that's ugly. They got a long list of how the hair should be cut if you're going to attend Trinity College. That's what North Korea does. I don't like that. No, thank you. Yeah, I don't like that. You should be able to look as dumb as you want.

Like I get it if it was like you're playing football and you have bangs down to your nose. Unacceptable. You need to be able to see the ball. Like, come on. You're business in the front, party in the back. You're already business in the front. You can see. I do.

I think it's tidy. They said it's not tidy. I think a mullet could be tidy. But I'm starting to think what kind of mullet this is. once he said what did you say it's australia yeah i'm picturing those like weird weird gelled like spiky mullets like the fashionable ones that were like like like like like douchey guys for a couple years you know what i mean what i'm thinking about yeah like a the ricky martin in the front and the like it was like you were like uh you're like a jacked like british bloke and like you got that like spiky mullet it's like it's like the euro

style mullet you know there's gel in it it's not like it's not like the extra lettuce like in a hockey helmet or something like that but i think it should be loud i don't like that i don't like i don't like uh you are canadian you can't get away from it you can't get away from it i don't like the man you the man knowing my moves or telling my moves like that. Right now where I live, there's a curfew. I'm cool with COVID shit. Locking things down. I was choked

when the gym was locked down. I'll blame me getting fat on that to the day I die. I'm just saying, when they added the curfew, I was like, no. I don't like that. As a Jew, maybe deep down, I don't like the i don't like as a jew maybe deep down you know i don't like the government telling me to stay inside and then i'm like oh yeah what are you gonna do if we don't oh dude i love the government

i'm good with something something's like i get it but like the curfew like now like so if I want to go walk my dog like if me and my girlfriend wanted to go walk one of our dogs like you need one dog per person like you can't walk your dog with like a husband and wife can't walk their dog together after 930 and I'm just like I don't know

I know I don't it doesn't to me it's just ugly and dumb and that bothered me the curfew was definitely bad and then I can't say shit because like the numbers here are are good they're like they're dropping uh but at the same time like you know who knows so I'm just kind of like like some things like that the hair the haircut I have even though it's not it's not the government you know it's still a form of the man some moves I don't like some things i don't like where i'm like no no i'm with you on a lot of things man you know fuck put a tracking device in me i'm cool man

5g whatever this my hair not not that not the telling me to stay inside no you can't you can't even go move your car if you people get tickets they go move their car like after 9 30 that's like extortion how would you move your car and they give you a ticket if you don't move it that's trash how would you feel about some sort of a badge or something you wore that indicated you had been vaccinated well he's what do you mean oh they they make you wear that no i'm asking i i i was gonna say the flip like if they're like if they're like uh yeah you have to wear a yellow arm badge if you're not vaccinated i feel like that's even worse because it's like a sign that like you don't have like you're not allowed to be there

and then people are looking at me i got a yellow arm badge like he's got a yellow bag don't let him in here you're not allowed in here you can't come in that i feel like it's like it's like they would have to pick a different they'd have to pick a different color and definitely not a star. They'd be like, no, it's a circle. The star of vaccination. It's a I think

it's definitely weird questions. Vaccination. It's weird, isn't it? If you want to travel freely from country to country, you should be vaccinated. That's given, isn't it? You know, like if you want to travel freely from country to country, you should be vaccinated. That's given the government way too much. Not a physical.

What buildings I'm going into, my day-to-day schedule. No, no, no, no, no, not that. What if it's just like your actual passport, right? The one that the U.S. Marshals are holding on to. Now I need to use it to go to the grocery store. I need to use it to go to a bar. I need to use it to go X, Y, Z. to use it to go to a bar i need to use it to go x you don't need to but but like what if what if you're what if your

passport like literally you're you have a passport you probably have a passport i've got a passport but like i said the u.s marshals are hanging on to it right now what if there was a second page in my yeah you know if i ever want to go to chicago again what if there was a second page you know there's a second page in my passport book that says vaccinated and like if I want to go somewhere I can be like aha got one of these and be like oh right through here sir just like the quick pass

if you're talking about different countries I totally get that no no no no I'm talking about fucking the most mundane places I'm not saying you you can't give them this amount of power I'm not saying you... No, no, no. Hang on. You can't give them this amount of power. I'm not saying that you don't allow people to come in unless they're vaccinated.

I'm saying it's just like... I got an easy pass here in Atlanta. I get to drive in a special lane. I've got the quick pass at the airport. I get to go around security. This would be something above and beyond what the

average person would have. And it would be like a little quick pass for me through life. It won't be though. They'll say, oh, we want to track you for COVID. It's like, no, they want to track you for a million different reasons. And they would overextend. Yes, it is. If they're discerning and scanning every time you go into an establishment somewhere. You didn't say any of that. Well, but that's what you're saying. I'm not saying that.

I've got an ID in my pocket, a driver's license. Same thing. I think this is one point. I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but you are tracked right now everywhere you go all the buildings you go to that information is available

and it is available the government still has to go through steps to get that from AT&T from Verizon, whatever and this is just to make it easier for them are you sure? I'm not like, I'm totally not a conspiracy theorist at all, but I do believe that the government knows exactly where I am

and they really don't have much pushback to find that out. I thought that was the whole, like, the beginnings of, like, you know, the whole Edward Snowden shit was just that, like, yeah, they have that information that's available to them. I've assumed that, like, they do know where you are. They do know what you're doing. They always have that. I feel like in the whole war

against big brother we totally lost that before we even realized we were at war with that uh terrorist attacks on the capital the riots uh they use their phones to determine who went inside yes yes they did and so like i'm not saying that they can't like ascertain all this information if they want it they obviously can it's the government very powerful but like we don't want to easy track this kind of shit like i agree with the government to do that like look at what happened with the patriot act we're just gonna we're gonna get rid of those terrorists in iraq it's like oh oh so you're not gonna surveil americans forever oh no you are so like don't don't give these fucking bastards any more leeway to track us or do any invasions of our privacy than they already have.

It's already so over the line. I agree with you. like if you're if you're having this uh if you're uh wearing a passport i find that interest an interesting question that he brings up because if like what you said to me like an arm bad show that you've been vaccinated is that's the type of stuff that and once again i'm not a conspiracy theorist but tearing apart the people from one another is like you know the whole like divide and conquer if some of us have visuals that we are vaccinated and others that aren't that's when it gets like to a whole like get the fuck away from us this is the vaccinated line you you're not vaccinated like i feel like government already knows they know how many times I wipe my ass today. They know.

But I don't need neighbors to turn on me for not being vaccinated as quickly as them or something like that. Those people should be turned on. I am all for it. Opening day for the Braves is coming up. I would love it if attendance was limited to vaccinated people only. And if you're vaccinated you only want that because it'll be less crowded and you can no i don't care if the place is i mean i don't mind baseball game it's stadium seating like pile in here with me there is some good stuff this limited capacity life is pretty hype some of the things that i do now you're not allowing him to

make his yeah i don't care about what his point is is that he wants to be surrounded by healthy people and there are irresponsible people who either make up 5G conspiracy theories about the vaccine they're irresponsible people who just say fuck you I don't give a shit about anyone but me they're not getting vaccinated they're not wearing masks they're not doing their part

and Kyle's like you know you can be you but stay the fuck out of public areas. If you're going to be an irresponsible asshole. And the best part about it, it's about protecting them from themselves. It's not that I don't want you to come. It's fine with me.

If you're unvaccinated and you come to sit right next to me at the Braves game, we'll do the wave together, right? We'll do the fucking Tomahawk chop, but I can't have you sitting next to another version of you and and like you infecting him and then him going in fact all right that's how we got in a situation already where we can't go to ball games and we and we and we like get barked at when we get up to go to the bathroom at the restaurant we don't put our bib on our face right like we don't have we don't have vaccines here in canada for people my age but the second i do obviously i'll jump on the vaccine the second i get the chance um until then i don't i don't have vaccines here in Canada for people my age, but the second I do, obviously, I'll jump on the vaccine

the second I get the chance. Until then, I don't do anything. I stay in most of the time, wear a mask everywhere. But I did, on a side note to what you were saying, I went to go see Kong vs. Godzilla, and I wanted to see it in the theater. So my buddy bought the seats, and he bought them because it has to have a clearance between every seat

so we were like nine people and he strategically bought the seats within the theater like as if it was mind sweeper to keep everyone away so we got this whole theater practically like by just picking and choosing seats with max clearance and we get in theater there was like really no one there and it was one of those things like you know i get in like super baked i get into the theater and i'm like yo this limited capacity shit is okay you know but i agree with you yeah like even though people are getting vaccinated not getting vaccinated like uh the not vaccinated people should be protected from themselves um but hopefully there's still some limited capacity vibes that can stay because it wasn't the worst and i'm gonna tell you i'm gonna have low-key ptsd after all

this covet stuff i think a lot of people will that they're not registering i think later on people are going to realize that like you know you kind of lost a year i think you're right and you didn't let that soak in and it's going to come back in the weirdest ways because now trauma works it's you're not going to know what it's from and like it's going to come and hit you in the weirdest ways because now trauma works you're not going to know what it's from and like it's going to come and hit you in the weirdest ways it might be something strange you know like some reality show that was playing at the beginning of pandemic or who knows what but i think a lot of people are going to mess with that but there is an element for me where i'm not so eager i had a lot of concerts i was going to and stuff i'm not so eager to go and be shoulder to shoulder with people i kind of like think we're a little gross now i look at

us i think you're 100 about like the ptsd like and not even ptsd necessarily like like you can look throughout the the covid thing like we're social animals we're supposed to be sociable and talking to people like look at the explosion in addiction problems opioid overdoses deaths of despair suicides exploding Like already we know that like before COVID though, right? No, no, there's been a huge explosion in suicide since COVID, but I mean, suicide has been, you know, I was talking about opioids in particular, like opioids for sure have been a huge problem for a long time. Definitely. Definitely. But I mean, like addiction, things like that, deaths of overdoses, suicides, all of that is.

And so you're a million percent right, Arlie. Like like it's you don't even have to wait till ptsd that'll definitely be a thing too but people are already like you can see locking a bunch of people down like we're social animals we're supposed to be so i got two things you said he was the opposite of me i wanted to know what it was you said you was the opposite of me. I wanted to know what it was. You said you were the opposite. Yeah. So you were like, hey, I'm enjoying this limited capacity thing. I like my elbow room. The fucking Woody social slingshot has just been getting loaded and loaded and pulled until great tension. I am on a fucking motorcycle trip on June 4th.

I can't wait to let this bitch go and just fucking get out in the world and start my life again. We are going to hit this midlife crisis shit head on. And we are going to... I'm looking at motorcycle tattoos and there's random... We are launching out of the gate, ladies and gentlemen. We are going to make shit happen.

We are going to begin life again because it's been put on pause for too long i have to know what what is the motorcycle tattoo idea the beamer boy bmw's like like i like that one oh the logo yeah well it would say that's ridiculous hold on i like cheese it's i'm not gonna get the nabisco logo on myself what it would you get it if you got a lifetime supply of cheese for free yes on my forehead if need be i'm not sure this one has a transparent background. Something like that is, you know, in my mind, nothing's set in stone. Where does that go on your body? I don't know.

See, the places that I like to put tattoos are like chick places. Like, what about my ankle? What about my wrist? Or, you know, like, whereas guys get them on their deltoid or, like, bicep or something. That's not where I want them. I feel like calf is a cool place. Hey, hey, hey. You're getting paid now, too.

Don't fuck with the... Calfs are good as they are. Don't be dare. I just want to characterize those beautiful, Greek, carven calves. One of the problems with the tattoo is the... I don't know where I want it. Maybe a butt cheek.

I can just hide it there or something. Is that the girliest of all Kyle made like the, I don't know. I don't know where I want it. Maybe a butt cheek. I can just hide it there or something. That is that the girliest of all Kyle made a face. I don't know. I mean, come on. If you got, Hey, I'll say this.

I'll get a group tattoo. If we could all agree on something and I'll, I'll put it just about anywhere. So think that went over. All right. So, so I got two things. You guys are going to get a pill tattoo.

No, no, absolutely not. Death before dishonor. Of course. So AMC theaters, I'm going to take advantage of this, this weekend.

You can choose from any of their available fan favorite movies for a hundred bucks. You get the whole theater for a hundred dollars. And their fan favorites are like classics like Jaws and stuff like that. For $150, all the new releases, the whole theater. And you can bring a dozen people with you or something like that. But if you just want to go on a movie date, you and a girl can get the whole fucking theater, watch Jaws, and then go to dinner.

Me and my girlfriend did Shrek. I never saw Shrek in theaters. I never saw Shrek in its entirety. And we did this about three weeks ago. Got to the theater and watched Shrek. And it was like, cool, you just get baked. AMC should be paying us some fucking money. Message at AMC's Twitter and let them know

we're pimping them out over here. And they should be paying us. I'm going to be like, times are tough. All right, I'm'm gonna say some strong words to amc right now um and the other thing is you mentioned kong versus godzilla i watched it last night on hbo what did you think of it i thought that movie was um also right off the bat it was good i liked it it was good. I liked it. It was good. And I liked it.

But there were a couple of times when I was watching that movie and I was like, this is fucking weird, man. This is a fucking weird ass movie. It was sick, but there are things that are happening. And I'm like,

they talk about Godzilla. So casually, they're just like, Hey, Godzilla's back and he's hurting people. And I'm like, if Godzilla is is back he's not hurting people he's destroying fucking cities he's leveling and i just thought it was so weird they talk about him like he's like he's hurting people's feelings something godzilla's back and he's hurting people and then king kong there's a guy he's on a boat king kong's

on a boat now oh king kong's jumping boat to boat. I know those boats hold tanks and fighter jets, but this is like a fucking huge-ass ape jumping on boats like it's a Super Nintendo platformer. I was obviously really high, but I was still like, this movie is fucking weird. I loved it, though. Dude, I didn't like the first half. The first half-

Agreed. The second half was stronger. The first half, they were like, second half was stronger the first half they were like all right we've got to come up with a way to make godzilla fight king kong and uh we're really gonna have to make up a lot of silly shit to make that happen like the whole storyline uh i'm not gonna spoil anything so anybody listening don't worry but the whole storyline of alexander skarsgård like and that that ship they use to go to this, this isn't a spoiler. This is just a plot point. They go to the center of the earth, which is where Kong is from. Like

all of that was like silly to me. It was like, why are we even doing all this? This is just filler. Like, I don't need any of this. I just want to see them fight when they finally fought. That was fucking cool. I actually liked liked that i thought the fight was well done um it that was the fun part of the movie that was the part of the movie i liked the most i don't like that little girl from stranger things she's it was i kept being like oh yeah she's in this what are we doing here and she's like a sleuthy like investigative like type and she there she's in these scenarios guys you're watching the movie and you're you're literally gonna be like well you got it pretty easy doing what you're doing like getting around and and being

where you are you know her dad calls where are you she's like i'm in hong kong in the secret lab and i'm like yeah you are aren't you by accident that was funny the word and then there's uh and you know what i might unintentionally spoil some things here by the way but guys it's king kong versus godzilla king kong godzilla fight, but guys, it's King Kong versus Godzilla. King Kong, Godzilla fight. Anything, nothing matters. It's one of those movies where nothing in the movie matters, and I'm just happy we got tons of fight. It wasn't like a 10-minute fight at the end, and that's why I'm going to give it a good review because we got those fights, and that's really what it was.

And it looks cool. It looks pretty cool. I'm sorry. You were about to say? really what what it was you know and it looks cool it looks pretty sorry you were about to say um that there's a black like janitor guy who's like the comic relief and he didn't even make me grin like he didn't say anything they were trying so hard to make him the comic relief the sort of jokey always got got some funny quip to make and i was like god hate this guy. He is not funny at all. Yeah, he reminded me of a person that I actually know and I actually hate. So I was like, it looks like this guy is doing an excellent impression of someone I dislike.

So I'm actively getting mad at him. A couple of characters like sucked. I thought even Alexander Skarsgård, who I love, I was like, I don't really care about this guy at all. He was kind of shit. But like, once again, like it was just king kong and godzilla were really awesome like they did something to that movie that were fucking cool look this is a movie where a giant lizard fights a giant monkey in the middle of hong kong at the end and the most ridiculous thing in the movie is when alexander skarsgard who is an author gets behind the the the wheel of a hover skywalker luke skywalker he gets behind the wheel

of a hovercraft and all of a sudden he's like han solo or something in the millennium falcon doing like 720 spins through rubble that's crashing down from the sky and stuff and it's like has he ever even driven a fast car like like like like when how was he a pilot in a was it was and then that thing he just like and that was new technology to him it's not like it was his or anything you know what that thing was like like keep in mind this is i don't imagine a helicopter a harrier jet those would each be much easier to fly this is some sort of a hover uh like a space type for mass effect it's like the mass effect like it's got like four like engines on the side they're like anti-gravity engines like this thing doesn't have a propeller not a jet engine this is like a sci-fi craft that he is flying

it's a spaceship essentially and he's just like here we go and he just gets in and drives it like it's a volkswagen or something that was the most unrealistic part of the movie in which king kong fights godzilla king kong had it rough like king kong like he's like you know he's just like from shit situation to shit situation to shit situation it's like the humans are just like yo wake up wake up and he's like we're in antarctica now and they're like yeah go in the hole he like goes through the hole he's like fighting creatures in fucking lord of the rings now like he had it hard that whole movie and all i was just like you know i'm not a spy i was just like you know i want king kong to catch a break somewhere here yeah i went into it i went into a team king kong godzilla is great but i just

relate more to this big ass ape than i do a fucking swimming lizard type dinosaur uh but like uh i think uh i don't know i i i know godzilla godzilla is deadly he's always i never thought king kong like anyways i don't want to spoil anything check it out guys it's cool and that movie you could rent it on amazon or whatever for 24.99 it's free on hbo uh max oh and it's free if you have hbo uh but speaking of amazon have you guys seen the show invincible or red no i've seen the previews for it's the animated show yeah yeah um it's animated show it's it's it's low-key it's just superman it's about like a half uh i mean it's about a an alien superhero that's literally superman um and he has his kid and there is a superman show now where superman has kids and it's like oh their kids have powers i don't know

but this is the story of like superman's kid um and there is a scene in it with him omniman the superman and he's like fighting the justice league and this is like robert kirkman like uh walking dead so it's like imagine superman fought the justice league and fucked them up like this isn't the first episode and i for me it's what got me hooked on the show so i don't think there's uh spoilers here but like it's like and it's on youtube all over youtube that scene he like just like if superman really just fought i've always been like batman could fight superman he has a plan sorted out but imagine superman was just instant about it was like no i'm gonna fuck you all up right now and it's like us it's like disgusting put that show on guys i recommend

invincible on amazon prime there's three episodes up now as of this recording and that shows good time i recommend it for you guys also but shows like that shows like the boys against yes batman would have a chance here's why batman has a chance all right i'm team batman has a chance also batman has a chance to get superman the same reason i have a chance against brock lesnar i know we're going to fight yeah i bring a gun i bring a gun and now i win you act like that's ridiculous to say batman's gonna bring a fucking crypt kryptonite gun oh he literally does in the movie you gotta also you gotta think yeah you gotta think of something else also it's like that like like i imagine superman like this is a guy uh i've never been to kansas so i love everyone from kansas he's like an american dude in kansas he's got like white k-swiss like cargo shorts he's got like a backwards hat like right up to here he wears like you know two polo shirts with the paul colors popped he's

like a a real kansas like american boy like you know he he doesn't have any serious hobbies uh you know he ended up going into dirt like this is just superman's got the brain of just a guy yeah and it is brains over bronze i think and batman is coming with a fucking plan and and one misstep superman like i mean obliterate him but like if if like this is the key thing like kyle said if he knows if batman knows then i think he has a great chance and batman doesn't know that's something and he's fucked up if you're mad like wake up we're fighting, it's over. How fast can Superman fly? What? How fast can Superman fly?

Oh, it depends on the comic. He can fly around fast enough to reverse time. He turned time back in one of the movies, dude. Just as fast as he wants. That's the last. If Batman's fucked, he can probably dodge bullets. No, that's Superman. Oh, he can absolutely dodge bullets, but it won't matter because the bullets bounce off of him.

Superman brought back time? Krypton. if you're getting krypton bullets at him lois lane died in an earthquake and he got very upset so he reversed time and brought her back yeah that's in one of the movies though look okay flash could do that and then the other and the other thing is is that superman's like a genuinely like pure hearted, like individual according to comics, Batman's a real dirty fighter. That's kind of his thing, right? Like this argument.

I always hear this argument that Batman would win because he'd be willing to win. Whereas Superman will take pity on the other guy. Yet Batman hasn't killed Superman, right? It always ends with, Hey, I just want you to know I could have,

right? And it's like, Oh, so where's this killer instinct that you always get credit for? Superman could just the same be like, yeah, I'm looking at you right now. You're dead the second I choose laser eyes. It is such a lopsided fight. It's just a dude with a gun against a god.

It's not fair. He can fly apparently fast enough to reverse the Earth's polarity. It's not fair. He can fly apparently fast enough to reverse the Earth's polarity. And he can like if you shoot a nine millimeter at him, he can like see it, register it, and then casually move to the side. And then you can catch it with his eye. You think he's moving for a nine millimeter? He's making that for sure. So he can dodge these regular bullets if he's so if he if he pleased.

He doesn't have to just let him. But a Krypton gun is gonna kill him why wouldn't he just dodge that you gotta you gotta you gotta get deep you gotta go deep here though here's where you go those go you go oftentimes as fast so the way they did it in the comics is they uh they used um um it i can't remember the the i get confused with marvel and dc but they it would maybe green arrow uh in this like alternate time frame what had happened was nixon this is the time area that it took place and nixon had like outlawed all of the superheroes and and you had to have like a superhero license

and uh superman had actually cut off one of green arrow's arms so that he couldn't be a superhero anymore and so like you can't draw the bow one fucking arm well batman like recruits him to like help him in their final fight when he's fighting superman and the green arrow i don't remember exactly how he does he's got like a one-armed bow or something but he shoots the green javelin he shoots a kryptonite uh he shoots a kryptonite arrow at Superman. And Superman, of course, hears it coming, turns around and catches it. And he's like, really, dude? But then the tip of the arrow explodes and it's kryptonite gas that he breathes in. And it weakens him severely.

And then Batman comes in and starts beating the fucking shit out of him. Because the kryptonite gas withers him away. That's a two-on-one, though. But no, he's not going to fall for that. Batman doesn't fight fair. Yeah, I agree. I also think that the thing is, when you look at the richest man in Gotham,

you've got to connect with the richest man in Metropolis, and that's Lex Luthor. And these are just two rich guys talking, but these are two guys that it is very important to them for very different reasons to know the ins and out weaknesses of superman and as i believe lex luther has like there it depends it all depends on the author and everything lex luther luther's got a power suit that helps him fly and be super strong and it's never strong as superman spider or i'm sorry superman that's a superman

villain that's a superman's nemesis um and he's a great he's a great villain but i read this one uh book called luther and what was so cool about it was uh it was it was lex luther flying into gotham and he was just like you see the plane landing and lex luther's like i fucking hate this city he's like it's so dirty or whatever he goes to the fanciest restaurant in gotham to have a one-on-one dinner with bruce wayne um and he goes to bruce wayne and he's like hey listen i don't know if you know about the alien in our city um and you're just some guy he doesn't know he's batman he's like but it might be valuable for you because i know you have ties with batman to take this and use it and i've seen you see lex luther give batman

kryptonite and he's like uses and bruce wayne's all like what am i gonna do with this shit but batman inside his head is all like oh like this is very interesting like what is this like material i've never seen before but you see lex luther giving it's like this is very interesting like what is this like material i've never seen before but you see lex luther giving it's like this is like a network of humans because superman is an alien and if superman existed you know how many people on earth would be like bro this guy could tear the world apart in a second it's almost like similar to the kong king kong versus godzilla has a similar storyline to some extent like men want to be the apex predator and if superman is the apex predator there are a lot of

powerful men that'll be like we need to do something about this and batman's not just a powerful man but he's like a paranoid guy yeah and and i know in justice leagues in the past like batman has a file on how to kill every single member of the justice league and the enemies get their hands on it at one point like superman doesn't have a file he's just like i'll fuck you up bro yep that's it in that luther comic by the way he ends up making it is some sort of javelin uh kryptonite javelin um and he shoots like this harpoon but like it's just not enough like it really isn't enough psychology the psychology of luther is fascinating like it's one of the coolest things in all of comics because he

i saw this one i I don't remember what, what, what, what movie it was or what cartoon or whatever, but he's having this conversation with Clark Kent about why he wants to like take Superman out. And, and,

and he's like, he's working out in the gym at the time. And like Luthor is like the pinnacle of, of human fitness. Like he is about as strong as a human being can be like he has no powers right none none whatsoever he's just incredibly rich and he's a super genius and uh and and he's like spent his life becoming the best human being he can be he's he's he's knowledgeable in everything from like fucking ancient ruins to to art to to to, you know, he invents all these like crazy gadgets and futuristic toys.

It's why Luther, uh, enterprises or whatever it's called is so, uh, it's why he's so wealthy. And he's having this conversation with Clark Kent and he's like, you know, I spent my life, you know, becoming as close to perfect as a man can be. And when he's doing this, he's doing like overhead presses with like 350 pounds or something. Four plates or something absurd. He's just crushing it. And he drops it. It's just like, boom, boom, boom, boom. He's wiping the sweat off. He's from fitness to intelligence to culture. Every step of the way, I've tried to perfect my life, to live the perfect life. And then this alien lands and he's just given everything and more, everything that I could ever want to accomplish. He's given it. He didn't work hard a day in his life. He's a walking

weapon of mass destruction whose motivations we don't fully understand because when's the last time he had a press conference and answered one question to us? He flies around at the speed of a bullet enforcing justice as he sees fit. He is unregulated. He answers to no man, certainly no he has to go he needs to go for my sake for your sake for the world's sake god damn it he's right and even clark kent is like hello clark kent's like kind of right he's damn it right you can't have this guy what superman does is he immortal does he live live forever? Essentially. Okay, well then eventually he's going to become a fascist.

Eventually. I mean, there's comics for you guys. If he lives forever, he'll go through every possible thing. He'll try every way to manage the humans for their own best. I'm doing this to protect

them. If I have to do something egregious... I'm sure that's probably a couple comic book lines it is i think that is a couple of them where oh yeah yeah i'm sure i'm sure and so like okay first of all the way you explain that kyle i don't know anything everybody knows i don't know anything about the superhero universes i get them confused often but lex luther was making some good points there that makes a lot of he's amazing he makes superman interesting i don't find superman interesting i find him interesting i heard i work really hard to get good stuff and this guy got good stuff without working hard so we should take it from him why life's not fair suck it up no not kick him out no because it's more it's more like yo at any moment this alien that you know nothing about could tear our planet in half.

He could breathe in space and fly to another one. But he hasn't. All he's done is devote his life to making this world the best place it can possibly be. There's been no one ever as pure-hearted as Superman. And then you've got Lex Luthor over there, a supervillain, trying to convince you that you need to stop superman because he is we don't know we don't know these are super villains in the universe like we do because we're readers but people there they don't know they're like they're like lex luther's literally like yo he's a boss ass all-american entrepreneur if you don't like lex luther you don't like america

oh it's good that's it i hear you but he's not making a good argument right no he's a super villain he is ultimately wrong but you could relate a little bit to what he's saying no but is but is he ultimately wrong in his argument that hey allowing this person who's basically immortal and who can circumvent any of our laws at a whim and he will eventually pivot to an area that is bad for us that's kind of a natural thought process and do we want to live here in our society when at any point he can just decide you know what i don't like this whole government thing i'm going to destroy every government on earth and i'm going to be the ruler like i mean it's scary that someone has that much power but

if he hasn't done anything to deserve a punishment then he shouldn't get one it's just remove him it's true what helps superman's muted you're muted you're muted you wouldn't you wouldn't agree to that if it was if it was a person though right and not some like flying alien wearing an s on his chest you would never say you know biden's never really done anything that bad i mean i guess he can have control over every aspect of my life in fact every aspect of every human being's life so So yeah. So he's going to live forever now. All right. Well, I guess he'll just, you know, be in control of everything forever. All right. Sounds good. If we're doing parallels here, I think the stronger one is all of you are against guns, right? Like what you could do by owning a gun is horrendous. You could go to a mall.

You're an infinite KD. Everyone else is walking around unarmed and you have a gun. So I need to take your gun from you so that you don't do things. And it's like I have never done anything bad. Why are you punishing me? I disagree. I think the biggest thing, I think a more equal comparison would be a society full of guns and then one guy who didn't earn it is in charge of every single nuke on earth and you need to realize that even though

that guy with with his finger on the button of every nuke on earth china the u.s everything he's been benevolent so far he's been benevolent so far so why we're also missing i assume that anything in this world would ever change like in this situation to earn all those nukes i'm sorry harley he just nobody know how yeah but he shouldn't it's not just that we're missing what we're missing is super important is also this guy is like aliens are attacking and he's defending us every time that's a big plus we're not only he I like Superman. He literally saved the whole planet yesterday, and he's going to do it again

tomorrow. That is a big plus for Superman. A tyrannical dictator will defend his kingdom from an attacking army so that he can maintain a tyrannical dictatorship. That doesn't really make it through the wash for me as a rationalization well there's nothing that could no so on the same topic as on the same

topic as this conversation which will spiral into circles in to infinity because we're talking about fictional characters i uh i watched half of the snyder cut last night it was four hours and 15 minutes long. I got sleepy about two hours into it. Not because it was not entertaining. It was just late. It was really late. I had to get to bed. I had to be up early this morning. I am so shocked by how

good it is. I watched the Justice League that was released, the Joss Whedon cut, and I hated it. I really disliked it. It was literally the worst superhero movie. And I thought that like, okay, so the Snyder cut, okay, what is he filling four hours with? How could it be that much different than the movie I've already seen?

It is so fucking good. And there are moments where like, now when I watched Godzilla versus Kong, there was maybe like two seconds in it where I was like, Oh, this is epic. I'm seeing a thing. This is like, this is almost like Lord, Lord,

like Lord of the Rings has a bunch of epic moments where you're just like, especially the first time you saw it, we were just like blown away. You're like, fuck. Yeah. Oh, when Gandalf appears at the top of the hill.

Right. And he's about to ride down to Helm's deep. It's like, fuck yeah. Oh, when Gandalf appears at the top of the hill, right? And he's about to ride down to Helm's deep. It's like, oh shit, Gandalf's here. And he brought the whole fucking Rohirrim. Fuck yeah, let's go. There are so many moments that are honestly equal to that in the first two hours of the Justice League recut that i've seen that are epic they're like they spend so much time on each character fleshing them out like bear the flash gets his time cyborg gets his time um wonder woman gets her time wonder woman gets a whole like action sequence the amazons they get a whole action sequence aquaman whole action sequence everybody gets their story told, and I'm only two hours in. There's this part where, like, it's the part where in the Joss Whedon cut,

the bad guy shows up, and he steals the box from the Amazons on their island. And it's real quick in the Joss Whedon cut, like maybe 10 minutes. I think it might be half an hour or more in the in the snyder cut all action literally all action and it's not it's not that crazy like shit flying everywhere and you can't even tell who's winning or losing and it's just like braveheart style fighting where it's just i mean that was and so terrible like it's not star wars style where it's just like everything's exploding and you don't know which ships are which. And it's just lasers here and lasers there. And so it's a good thing they all got together before they started and agreed the good guys will shoot green lasers

and the bad guys will shoot red lasers. I already have no fucking clue what's happening right now. How did I never think of that? Yeah, right? They all agreed beforehand. So, no, there's this great sequence where they're trying to keep the box away. There's this one moment where like this, this box is being, has been like safeguarded by the Amazons for thousands and thousands of years.

And it starts moving and wiggling and vibrating and making noise. So like, I don't know, let's call it 50, 60 Amazons are surrounding it and they're all around it with their weapons drawn out and everything. And, and like the queen of the Amazons is like, like shows up, she gets the call. And, surrounding it and they're all around it with their weapons drawn out and everything and uh and like the queen of the amazons is like like shows up she gets the call and uh um the bad guy

comes through a portal and he says something like uh i can't remember exactly what he says but he's he's like show me your fear or it's like you will fear me and the queen's like, Amazons, show him. Suck his dick! The queen kind of smirks and she's like, Amazons, show him your fear. And all the Amazons like chant together, we fear nothing or something like that. And it's like

one of those like 300 moments where I was just like, ooh. I got the chills a little bit. That's going to be a cool battle i'm ready and they all just start fucking shooting arrows and swinging swords and killing all the uh the the dragonfly demon it's a crazy game of keep away it's like a keep away they have this game of keep away that is really cool and and this is our raid i think who's the main bad guy sorry steppenwolf steppenwolf he is but the real bad guy is darkside

darkside is like an uber villain in the dc universe dude i fucking spelled that right because i knew it was based on a german like like like like steppenwolf s-t-e-p-p-e-n wolf yeah steppenwolf is steppenwolf is darkside's like Wolf. Yeah, Steppenwolf is Steppenwolf is Darkseid's, like, bitch boy. Alright? And Steppenwolf himself

is, Steppenwolf himself is, like, almost equal to Superman. Like, he can beat up anybody in the Justice League except for Superman. Dude, this guy is like, he's like that scene where they're talking about Nazis and like, are we the baddies? Like, he's wearing devil horns, a devil

head on his chest. He's got a, he not only horns a devil head on his chest he's got a he not only has a devil horn on his chest he has a smaller lower devil on his stomach you gotta make sure you know who steppenwolf is worshiping satan probably right oh uh by the way just just just to say the uh like steppenwolf is like far more powerful than the justice league and uh and the amazons and stuff but like when you do when you do continue it was in the first one also um if you saw the the older one i i'd forgotten some of the scenes but superman does come and has interaction with steppenwolf and you realize that like however much more powerful steppenwolf is to the justice league superman is that like times 10 to steppenwolf really it's like you only get the one thing

that bothered me about this one and the joss whedon one is like i like seeing extravagant things in the theaters and like so superman should should should take up a portion of the movie and if it's four hours it does kind of suck when it feels like superman is in it for 10 minutes um because he is it is like very short uh but like superman's powers and and the way they show it and it took a lot of build-up is just very cool like i don't like superman or find him quite interesting uh but when you get to see him in a movie that's when it gets cool because i love when movies movies show extravagant things. There's a part when Wonder Woman's blocking bullets from a fully automatic gun. And it looks cool because it's like, what would that really look like for real?

Or just their take on it. And there's a couple flash moments that are really cool that remind me of the Quicksilver moments in the X-Men movies. Remember those? Yeah. All those? Yeah. All those scenes were so cool. And I like when they could show you the powers. Because when you're like a filmmaker or whatever,

you got to sit there and think about like, how am I going to show this in the coolest way? I personally thought the whole movie was kind of goofy and shitty, but it was so entertaining. And it reminded me like, you know, Zack Snyder's. Yeah, yeah. Zack Snyder's got an eye like this guy knows how to make things look fucking cool and good and i used to love zack snyder and i saw sucker punch and i despised that movie i wasn't about it at all yeah he did i remember when every movie looked like 300 after that for a while like every

action movie wanted that style that darkness like that blood spattering style yeah slow motion action and in like in 300 it was so cool because it was unique at the time where it was you know the slow or the fast motion slash and the slow and you see the guys like torso tear apart and then you're right every movie after that was like oh 300 found the formula we're gonna do a worse version of that and it was it's funny you mentioned Zack Snyder and his appreciation for style like what he has because that I thought about that too I made daily vlogs for a while I made like 140 of them or something there is nothing in Casey Neistat's editing that

we don't all know how to do right it's just's just jump cuts and some music, speed it up. Like it's not that. What Casey Neistat has is taste. You know, the music that he chooses, the pacing that he puts in. Of course, the things that he does are extraordinary. But even when he's not doing extraordinary things, right? He can just put a hook in that fucking studio, which is so interesting. And he edits it with a taste with a style that makes

it compelling with the pacing with the music with the jumps are in the spot that lets you see what's happening and it's like that's why this guy's so good at this it's not people think he's good at editing we all know how to click on jump cuts. He's good at pacing at music selection. He's good at lighting. Like he's, I don't know. I appreciate what he does. And I guess he doesn't really,

I just want to do this channel. Yeah. He has one video in the last six months. I think Jesse Wellens is a good, is a good followup as cause Jesse Wellens take also makes like these vlogs. And I watch it. I'm like, bro,

relax. You went to the beach. I can't believe you brought three camera devices. There's like, you've got the drone shot, but make it look like you, like, you know,

everything just goes together. So crazy. And I, and I do have like a, a lot of respect for that. People that just have an easy time, like, you know,

or at least they make it look easy. You know what I mean? They make it look easy when they pull it off. It makes every task so hard though. I don't know. I've done vlogs of me changing the oil on my truck. It takes me 15, 20 minutes to change the oil in a car. It takes me an hour to do it while taping.

Just the – I don't know. There's so much pain in the assery involved in lighting and videotaping and stuff it makes every task three times harder do you think you'll ever go back and do some more vlogs like that or not really interested at the moment at least it doesn't excite me i was thinking of doing them for my trip that's a good idea i mean that's it's two months away plenty of time to amp yourself up it's i i kind of want it documented, you know, like even just for me and family or whatever, you know, to show the adventure. It's almost a way to like communicate with guys while I'm gone. Like, hey, this is what it is.

This is what I'm seeing. This is what I'm doing. I'm going with a buddy. Oh, Harley doesn't know. Harley on June 4th. I said motorcycle trip. Motorcycle trip from North Carolina to Oregon and then back some way via dirt roads. And apparently there's something called the Transamerica Trail, which is basically gravel roads, mountain passes, shit like that.

It's all sort of off road. And that's what I intend to do. The East Coast sounds really awesome. The fact that it's off off road also sounds really awesome. That sounds like a really cool aspect to it. There's like a trail you can only take with like a bike you wouldn't be able to get in there with a car mostly yeah there's they call that single track when it's just like motorcycle width and there's some single track in there a lot of it is just like gravel roads and stuff like your that's cool it would be oh what's the people you'd be going at because if

it's a lot of it a lot of it is dirt and gravel like 40 miles an hour 50 like oh i don't even know motorcycle wise like how fast will you be going i think there's parts of it like so in north carolina actually a lot of it's paved there's just some like river crossings but paved um and in there of course you'll be able to go like 50 70 it looks i've watched a ton of videos on this on the dirt roads i'm estimating these guys are going like 30 you know something like that oh damn no wonder it's gonna it's gonna be a long trip but but like it's not about getting there fast or he'd be on the interstate yes if he just wanted to get to oregon there's a flight every day where do you sleep are you getting in hotels you have like hotel strip or do you like camp out at

all there's two ways to do it you can do it via camping or hotel my my buddy is like so we're doing hotels right or motels like picture small town bed and breakfast air b type things and i think we're doing it that way part of it is i'm not that good at motorcycles especially off-road i've real limited off-road experience. And if you camp for even one day, shit, you're bringing the capacity to cool food, cook food, tents, rain gear, yada, yada, yada. Whereas you can save a lot in gear if you're not camping. So I think that's the thought. Just lighten up the bike by 80 pounds by not camping.

What kind of bike do you have? It's a BMW G650GS. It's an adventure motorcycle their smaller one um i could show a picture of it yeah please is that is that they call it how long you're motorcycle that's interesting how long have you been a motorcycle i didn't even know that did i know that did we ever talk about that and by the way the link that i put there was for a luther book that i read that's that if you liked what kyle was going off on it's all from the perspective of luther um it's just by brian brian azarello for those listening if you're interested brian azarello dc app check it out if you want or not fuck dc i don't give a shit they're not fucking paying pk they could suck our dicks suck our little sour

jewish dicks i didn't know link was going to have a bunch of fucking... I got to pick this fantasy book series first. I can't buy any more books. I like that black one there. That's what mine is. It's black like that. That's what you have. That's sick.

What amount of weight... This is like... I don't want to disrespect it. I don't want to disrespect it. But this is like the thing I always jump on in open world video games. If you have this as an option like i'm going on that this is like like i don't know if you played the latest ghost recons but they have some of these like and you're like going up and down like dirt roads and shit like that this looks like it's between i

don't know anything by them talking about my ass this like it looks like it's in between like a sick ass motorcycle on roads and like a sick ass dirt bike. It looks like it's not as hardcore enduro like as a pure dirt bike but it's meant to be a little of both. Will you have huge saddle bags on that? Yeah saddle bags and a top case maybe

which goes like on the very back behind the passenger like a boxy thing. What's a top case? Shit. When did you get into motorcycles? Container on the back and then like two giant saddlebags on the side. Right? I'm clicking on the wrong thing.

Because if you're going to potentially camp, you're going to have to carry a good bit of stuff. Oh, you said he wasn't going to camp. I thought. Yeah, fuck it. Camping's stupid. Unless you want to low-key fuck your friend, then camping would be hot. No, I want to low-key fuck your friend then camping would be hot no i want to i key fuck kyle so so blazer kyle can fucking he could blast all of us right boys or it doesn't look just like this this is what a top case is it's that case behind oh i've seen this yeah i know the uh the thing i

linked like like um i think we talked about this last time and i've seen this yeah i know the uh the thing i linked like like um i think we talked about this last time and i've talked about it now as i am i know everybody doesn't want to keep hearing the same shit but this is such an aesthetically pleasing bike this indian it looks so cool i know right i fucking love it i don't like the red as much i think i don't like the red either i'm black maybe even matte like a matte dark gray finish we're same fucking page brother either black uh shiny black matte black or the matte silver that they do as well uh in 185 days i'm moving and uh and like this is pretty high on my list of priorities that that i want like like i want that fucking motorcycle and they're cheap. As you can see, like it's nine grand, like it's, and that's a brand new 2021 is nine grand. Like granted it's,

that's probably the non ABS model that's being like promoted there. And I do want anti-lock brakes, but used, you can pick these up for six grand, five grand. Even if you get one, a couple of years old, I want the current current body style which you're looking at there i'm not exactly sure when the body style changed but that's neither here nor there that's a little bit down the road but yeah i like that bike a lot it doesn't have the versatility of what woody has but i i like the style of it whatever fits your mission right yeah yeah i mean i really do like woody's bike a lot like like it woody's bike looks like a it looks utilitarian how much is your bike woody uh so they don't make it anymore knew it was like 7500 and i think i got it for and i have no concept of how much

motorcycles cost i'm shocked is that higher i like i i looked at your motorcycle i thought that was like a twenty thousand dollar thing and then the one that i'm looking at here i'm like i would have thought that was twenty thousand dollars i have no concept then again i'm also automatically thinking canadian numbers and like uh like a ski do is like fifteen thousand dollars and i just i don't know why i didn't think like yeah i don't know why like some brands are really expensive like harley davidson's can be twenty thousand dollars like you said ducati's like like can be really expensive um that i knew i knew that was an expensive brand but i still thought let me show you the bike that i love or something i just want to squeeze in i feel like i dodged

harley's question twice when i got into motorcycles as a teenager and in my 20s i rode motorcycles all the time i didn't have a car so i just that was how i got everywhere and um then there was a huge gap and i got this bike four years ago i rode it kind of didn't ride it for like two years and now i'm back at it so there's so i'm sorry i cut you off at the end that's cool um so this link right here is the bike that I, I love the way it looks. I think it's super fucking sexy in that color scheme that it's being like put in there, but it's way too fast for me. Um, I'm, I'm a completely unexperienced rider, inexperienced rider. And, um, I think the Scout 60 is a lot more stable. I've

seen people suggest it as a first bike, which seems a little crazy at a thousand CCS or whatever it is, 1100, I think maybe. Um, but my thing is like, just don't fucking twist the fucking accelerator that hard. And I have no interest in going fast or like what, like a bike guy would consider fast. Like the speed limits are fine with me. If that makes sense. I have no interest in going a hundred miles an hour, even much less 150, 200 miles an hour, which some of these crazy high end sport bikes are capable of. But this bike, this 1200 Indian, this FTR is so sexy to me.

I don't like seeing the fort nine video on this bike. I'm pretty sure it's this one. If it's made recently, no. But like if you go back six months, I watched every video for every bike that was current. He does a video, and I think it's this motorcycle, about like what beauty is in a motorcycle. And he points out this sort of like line,

the red one that goes from the bottom left to the upper right through the shock uninterrupted he points out the special effort they put into towards making the top of the motorcycle level like it is right that's not not all bikes are like that the the fork rake it like they go through all this effort to make this a beautiful motorcycle and he's like a lot of this stuff you wouldn't appreciate unless you're a designer. But if you're a regular person, you just look at it and say, ooh, I like, and that's where I am on this. I'm like, yeah, I like this.

I instantly liked it. And I'm like, oh, wait, this is the one from that video that the designers really put a lot of effort into making this so wonderful. I like this. I like that it's upright. It's an upright bike too. I like that it's upright it's an upright bike too i like that like like it's not full-on fucking um uh rear rear peg uh bike you know it's yeah it appeals

to me a lot rear peg rear peg yeah rear peg bike will get you fucking real bad that's what it'll do yeah i have no interest in that like like, like, um, but, but man, um, the Indian motorcycles really appeal to me. They're American bikes. Um, I think they're older than Harley. I think they're the original American bike could be wrong about that. Probably. I wouldn't know, but Harley is, um, from what I've read anyway, I'm not a bike guy. I don't pretend to be, but Harley seems to me to be very overpriced and they don't get nearly as much bang for your buck. And you don't get as much bang for your cubic centimeter of engine displacement either. Like just the optics of it, how it looks like.

I just linked something because I was curious and Harley was 100 percent on the dot. Twenty thousand dollars for this 2021 Pan American 1250 special Harley Davidson. for this 2021 Pan American 1250 Special Harley-Davidson. Compare the two. This thing looks way less cool than your Indian or Woody's bike. If you told me this Harley was a $3,000 bike, I would have believed you. It doesn't even look cool. It looks like a fucking scooter.

It looks so ugly. Their prices are jacked up, aren't they, Harley-Davidson? Big time. It's not just the coloring of it. Scroll down and you'll see more versions of it that are even more expensive. They all look shitty. None of them are cool. I wouldn't pass.

I don't know shit about bikes. Probably less than anyone here. But if I were to pass one of those, like a $20,000 bike, which is apparently very nice, I wouldn't register that. I would think that was like, oh, yeah, someone cobbled together a bike out of miscolored parts. It looks like shit. Oh, I watched that Fortnite video.

I just looked up the video that I saw. It was the Harley Davidson killed itself video, the Fortnite one. Yeah, yeah. That was a sick-ass video. And it was just talking about how motorcycles were so cool coming back from the war and stuff like that and then harley davidson fucking with their prices is to make it seem like more of like a like not designer but like something like that like you know sometimes

it like gets people interested and then what they did uh and they get like i don't know was it subsidizing but they get a lot of help from the government or whatever it is what's those sons of anarchy bikes where like the pipes or the tubes go down really low and the wheels way out front are you looking for chopper is that what it's called a chopper like this style well it's a style of bike that's what i always associate as a non-bike knowledge haver of harley's like i always assume that's what Harley means. Like a chopper. So this is an adventure bike in the same class as mine. I actually like mine more, but maybe I'm biased.

But Harley's making electric bikes now. They're doing everything they can so that they can expand their market beyond 65-year-old dentists who are people buying it today. And they're just trying to appeal to kids people buying it today yeah and they're just trying to appeal to kids adventure bikes whatever they're just trying to they're like oh look our market is

drying up seven years from now they're all going to stop buying motorcycles so how do we get the next gen of buyers and what is the benefit of a chopper style motorcycle is it more comfortable to ride is it the visual that people like like is i think it's about the. Yeah, you're kind of doing a sit-up a little bit. They usually have back support like the way that the seat sits, but I've ridden one. It wasn't for me. I felt like maybe I'm just uncomfortable with it, but I didn't feel that in control.

The upright style that Kyle likes and that I have is the most comfortable for me just sitting up sitting on top uh but yeah i don't know i like harley sometimes i think about getting one i'm on craigslist all the time looking for more bikes now but i don't even know what i want i see like or all like oh this is what i want i want this i want this then i see it and i'm like but um yeah get an indian scout 60 i know right where you can keep it this ftr looks cool how much is it oh 11.5 is not as high as i expected you can again i bet that's non-abs if i had to guess i looked in the wrong spot that was like previous models starting as low as 11.5 no these are these are 15, 17. Yeah.

I watched a video. The gauges are very cool. Everything about it is real cool. I don't know. It's a cool bike, but it's not the one that I'm going to get. I'm almost certainly going to get the Scout 60, which I'm pretty sure the only difference between the Scout 60 and the Scout is one less gear. I don't need six gears. Honestly, I'm on Harley Davidson's

website. I'm looking at all their models these are the ugliest bikes in america these are terrible there aren't any choppers there's nothing cool it just it looks like shittier versions of what you guys are both interested in the indian you have or you're you're selecting kyle very cool aesthetically what are your bmw very cool i like i like the finish you decided on i wouldn't have liked it if it was colored but i like i um it doesn't look good on their website but i've seen videos and stuff of their electric motorcycle that i thought were pretty cool uh the live wire all right i bet an electric motorcycle doesn't have any problems with range. Because isn't that the biggest complaint with the cars?

It has huge problems with range. Really? Yes. Because electric cars have room for a gigantic battery. But they still have range problems. They'll be like, oh, 200 miles, 250 miles. It's like 100 miles on a motorcycle. That's fucking bullshit.

It's so much smaller. It should be better. So is the battery right like if you want to tow a battery behind you on like a little u-haul trailer then wait you go a long way on a motorcycle forever with a bunch of car batteries on a u-haul you look like an asshole weight's a big deal on a motorcycle because if it tips even a little bit then all of a sudden that's you pulling it up and um so that you know they have this balance like how light can they keep it they have this balance, like how light can they keep it. They have problems with range, but also I'm told,

I've never ridden an electric motorcycle, because it's so quiet, you connect to the road in a different way. You're not hearing the engine. You're hearing the tires on asphalt. You're hearing the birds. It's a different sort of zooming environment that's really pleasant. I think it sounds attractive to me but i haven't tried it isn't a big reason that a lot of people get motorcycle or i guess this is probably also a chopper thing like they like the loud noise it makes regular motorcycles don't quite

boom that that right a lot of car guys saying like like you can put pipe you can put different pipes and and your your motorcycle can be as loud and obnoxious and as obnoxious as you want it to be. And, but, but one of the things about, you know, there's that South park bit about, you know, what do you call somebody that rides a, when it was loud, Harley's up and down the street and ruins everybody's time, a faggot. And, and you can, you can see it that way. But the, the reason that a lot of people want loud pipes is because you are on a two wheeled rocket ship. That is one little nudge away from you spinning down the interstate at 80 miles per hour with nothing between you and the asphalt,

but your fucking pants and your shirt. So they want to be loud enough and your skin meet crayon style. So they want to be loud enough that people know you're there. The, the, the problem is i don't want everybody to know you're there when you know who the biggest douchebags in the fucking world are those people with radio systems on their bikes that ride through town like there's a nice little area near me with like lots of little little hippie coffee shops and like antique stores and shit. And it's mostly foot traffic and you know, there's speed bumps to slow the cars down. It's a nice little area. We go there, we, we, we hang out. It's, it's a real nice place to go. And this

cocksucker comes riding through on his loud ass motorcycle and he's just, and I'm like, what a douchebag. And then he starts playing kid rock so fucking loud that you can hear inside the fucking coffee shop. What an asshole. Oh, I agree. You know who I hate? Well, I'm looking at my game and I'm going to head out west. He likes the song so much that everybody has to listen to it.

I'm with Kyle, but this behavior, the twist on it. So now COVID, outdoor seating. it so now covid outdoor seating i'm always doing outdoor seating at restaurants ideally with a propane heater or something those guys that start their loud ass bike and take like 10 minutes of warming up before they leave just fucking go you're bothering everybody out here there is a whole restaurant full of people sitting outside because of the coronavirus listening to you warm up your goddamn noisemaker that if your bike takes 10 minutes to warm up fucking get a different one just start it and leave that's how i my bike i warm it up for

like as long as it takes to put my gloves on what 40 seconds it's so fucking inconsiderate it's like someone being like oh it's a little chilly out you know I don't want my car to be even a little chilly so I'm gonna go roll all my windows down turn on my car and turn the radio up I'm gonna put on the oldies as loud as it goes you're a fucking dickhead you're a rude

person don't do that it infuriates me I'll never be that guy even if I had a loud bike I don't know. Think about the people around you. Just start it and leave. I'd start it and be like, I'm so sorry. Yeah.

Yeah. Anyway. So, but yeah, I'm very excited about this trip. All my waking moments are thinking about it, preparing for it. Just spent three days working on my motorcycle. I did a task that should probably have taken one and uh but it's finished now and tomorrow i'm gonna ride it very nice that was awesome that's a cool last trip no you know it would be the perfect apex is if your interest in this met with your interest in outdoor survival and and it you know and so you were like camping the whole way but i'm also glad that that's not the case because that would have

absolutely ruined your trip it it would have been so unpleasant like day two and you're like i'm so tired of beans there's the sleep apnea thing too i'm like how am i going to sleep with the c-pad machine and charge it every – am I going to charge this – like run off a battery and then charge it off my bike all day long during the drive? How am I wiring this? And like that kind of – it's so much nicer to just stay in a motel and not have camping gear to bring around. The BPAP machine helps you fall asleep obviously. the beat machine helps you fall asleep obviously but ever since you got it has the act of like laying in bed putting it on your face also helped you fall asleep because it's like this is sleep

mode time we're finalized that's it whereas like if you were just laying there regular you might be like oh man i want to watch the motorcycle video i want to i don't know you know what i'm not quite tired enough yet have you noticed that absolutely absolutely it's like you know we're initiating the sleep sequence put this thing on and go to bed uh it doesn't help me fall asleep although maybe it does it helps me stay asleep that's the big thing is it weird while you're awake feeling it like push air at you or no not anymore at first it was now like i'll wake up in the morning and i'll like leave it on because it's heated air it's humidified air it's pressurized air what am i just gonna fucking breathe whatever airs around me like some sort of fucking peasant no you just have a car

like a like a person who's on chemo kyle you you're muted. You are muted, my friend. Would you like it if it were flavored air? Oh, I didn't even think of that. That sounds great. What if it was butterscotch? What if it was butterscotch? And you were just like, Jackie's like, where are you heading, honey? To bed.

She's like, it's 5 p.m. You know, I'm a little hungry. Yeah, I'm heading to bed that would be badass such an awesome feature you could like set it to change so it's like yeah throughout the night i breathe lavender scented air so it keeps me asleep and then around 6 a.m it pivots to coffee scented air this is great yeah i don't know why my BPAP's not flavored. I feel like I'm missing out on something. Put some of this orange creamsicle in there and you're never going to want

to wake up. Yeah, but sometimes I'll wake up in the morning. Put pizza in there and breathe it. Breathe pizza for lunch. In the morning I'll wake up watching videos wearing the BPAP and just like, you know, easy breathing,

easy, warm, humid, lovely breathing on your phone. Right? Like you can't leave the bed with it. Right? Yeah. There's a hose,

you know, you're, you're kind of, as a matter of fact, if you sit up straight or like if the cord, like I'm on a laptop or something, I have to reach down and grab it. It's like,

yeah, it's not going to invest in a longer tube. It's not that it's like pulling my head um yeah it's not gonna invest in a longer tube it's not that it's not it's like routed behind the pillow in such a way that it's like not disturbing so it that's why it's such a short leash okay but uh yeah that's one of those things from like man i'm glad i don't need that. But then also, I might need it. You probably don't know until you try it. You don't know until your sleeping partner lets you know. I don't really snore, but I do have a lot of trouble staying asleep for more than a few hours at a time. Do you wake up having to piss or are you just waking up?

Often, I'm just waking up. I keep waking up having to piss. I drink so much water but before bedtime i gotta slow that down like like it's not a prostate issue or anything like that before our resident doctors get ahead of themselves i uh it's it's i'm always like filling this motherfucker up and drinking my maraca and drinking more water and uh yeah same exact one and uh got the nalgene over there okay old school yeah i piss all the time i'm just i'm just like every time i get up like from this

show i'm like taking the longest like it's one of those pisses where i'm just like oh yeah i'm glad you taylor's decided to read some ads i needed this you do those ones where like you sit down to piss and you didn't even well those ones where like you sit down to piss and you didn't even well that sit down to piss sit down to piss and shit if you have to piss and shit but regardless you're pissing and it's one of those pisses where it's like it's so much more than you thought there was where it's like you're sitting here doing the show and you're like i could go for a pee kind of and then you stand up and the second you say like oh no oh this was an emergency the whole time so like so much p is always in my system it's shocking all right so

like i went to go get that covid vaccine and i've been drinking a lot of water already my vaccine time was at like noon 11 a.m at 11 a.m so i get in the car and I'm driving and like half I'm sitting in the line for this thing. So I've driven about 30, 35 minutes and I've been waiting for about 10 and I got to piss so bad. And I'm just like, there's no way I'm getting out of this line and there's no way I'm making it to my shot without pissing. But I've got like a really tall coffee cup, um, like styrofoam cup from a gas station in the car that was left over from my trip to the mountains. And it's like a 22 ounce. And I'm just like, yeah, we're just gonna piss right here. We're stopped anyway, waiting in line.

So I, I start pissing and I'm like, we're going to fill her up. We're going to, yep. Yep. I fill the whole thing up. I pissed 20 fucking ounces minimum because it's almost brimming. All right. So when nobody's looking, I dump that out into the grass. I crack the car door, look around, make sure nobody sees me dump my piss jug and I empty it out. So then I wait in line for about an hour, hour and 20 minutes or something like that. It was a long wait. Get my shot. And then you got to wait 15 more to see if you're going to have a reaction. I got to piss again. So I'm like, well, glad we emptied this out. As I'm, as I'm dry, I do have to do this one driving. Cause I don't want, cause there's cops everywhere in that parking lot. And

the last thing I want is an indecent exposure charge at this point in my life. So I'm driving down the road. I put the thing in cruise control. I put my left foot all the way on the floorboard so I can like arc myself up, do like a plank or whatever, like a reverse plank. And I'm pissing into this thing again. I fill it up again. I fill it up completely again. And now I've got 20 more ounces of piss riding shotgun with me.

I get home and I'm like, you know, I've still got a piss and I piss more like I'm riding around all the time with like 50, 60 ounces of liquid just rolling through my body minimum. So when I go to bed at night, yeah, I'm waking up like at least twice in the night to piss. When I'm when I pee that much, I'm like, I should weigh in. I should wait. I just cut it. I wonder what I weigh right now. Yeah. So 128 ounces is eight pounds. You know, you can do the math. Do you have times where you notice you wake up and pee all the time? Because at like four 30 in the morning, I'm always waking up to pee. It's like predictable where I'll wake up and it's just some ethereal.

I don't know what time it is. I don't know what to. Oh, 431. Oh, 428. Oh, 433. Like I, I'm always pissing. I feel like at 430. I have done that, but I'm not that consistent.

Like, like you describe. No, I, I wake up. I wake up two or three times in the night and it's always to piss. And I don't know i would say like three hours into sleep i wake up and then three more and then three more or something like that and when i wake up randomly just like oh i'm awake i don't have to pee i i don't know why i'm awake it's always having to piss because like constantly and i hate it i uh i sleep really well i take my um you know not getting paid or anything by derek but he should

pay me derek um i i take my i take my fucking gorilla dream and uh it really like puts me to sleep and uh and i and i i sleep really well and i have my my weird fucking dreams too which i appreciate i've tried is uh it's not nyquil it's called like z quill and it's like nyquil without the acetaminophen active ingredients it's just like hey take this it doesn't have anything in it other than uh dimethylhydramine or whatever it is that's in benadryl to make you kind of sleepy and i've tried that to make me sleepier and it works sometimes but a lot of the time i just have really bizarre dreams and I don't like it. Like just really unsettling,

bizarre dreams that I don't like. And I don't, I really don't dream that much or at least not nightmares. Like I, I guess I wouldn't say that I dream all the time. I'd really, I can't remember the last time I had a nightmare. I just don't remember your dreams.

I smoke weed. I smoke ash before bed. Does that make you dream? You get no dreams at all. You get nothing. You just wake up. I always thought remembering your dreams had to do with waking up unnaturally.

If you just wake up and do the full cycle and ease into consciousness, you don't remember your dream. But if I were to like shake you you'd know what you were dreaming about when you when i woke you up that's such a bizarre thing that like scientists nobody really understands our dreaming our dream structure why we do it the the meaning of any of it it's just it's a fucking bizarre thing and you know that like other animals dream too because i'll watch i'll watch fozzie uh one of my dogs in particular he'll fall asleep next to my leg

late at night if i'm reading or watching the show and he does his little kicks and his like and it's like he's clearly he's clearly dreaming about running that little dumb ass yeah that little fucking dumbass. My dogs do that. Taylor, you have two dogs. Do you like one more than the other? See, it's split because Teddy is cuter than Fozzie. That's objective.

He just is. He's the runt of the litter. He's very little. And he has kind of a wool-like coat. So you pet him and it's very thick and wool like and so teddy's so cute he also likes me a lot because of the work from home thing attached to me fozzie is the objectively better dog he doesn't go to the bathroom in the house ever he rings the bell to go out he does everything correct and he's still adorable and so i would say i'm sorry teddy i know you're a big viewer of the show but you're lost out to fozzie insofar as my favorite dog

because like ted and teddy hasn't figured out how to ring the bell yet he just like i'll be like uh my my girlfriend falls asleep way earlier than i do most nights and fozzie if he's they both go to bed with her in the bedroom and Fozzie will come out in the middle of the night ring the bell and I'm like oh okay you gotta piss you gotta shit Teddy will just come out and just stare at me like a little neurotic weirdo until I like get up and take the initiative and I'll I'm even testing now because I'll like I'll I'll say something like Teddy you want to go out psycho potty and if I say it really quiet he's like kind of tilts his head and i go we'll go psycho potty and then he gets all excited and so he's like so dumb i need to say it in a specific tone of voice because he's clearly not understanding the words that i'm saying he just knows the tone of voice

so if i'm like i think he understands the words he's's just like, nah, you're bullshitting. You're bullshitting me, bro. I'm not buying it. When you mean it, then I'm down. Apparently dogs can recognize like a thousand words, apparently words. They're smarter than we believe. They know what's going on. They read off your emotions and your state of mind really well. They have some talent. They've evolved too.

It's really cool like our relationship with dogs is like nothing else in the animal kingdom and on the planet like like they didn't exist before us we recreated that thing and and like they've evolved to be our best companions that whole man best best friend thing isn't some sort of fucking slogan or some made-up hallmark shit they just are like like the reason their eyes look like that the reason they have those uh they have whites in their eyes look at a fucking wolf's eyes those dead fucking eyes they won't make eye contact with you uh my buddy out in texas like i hung out with his pet wolf that thing will not look at you he

just observes you a little. It's sort of that corner of his eye kind of thing, checking you out. Like a fucking convict in the fucking lunch line. Everything he needs, he's smelted. He's checking his fucking corner. He doesn't need to fucking look at you. He knows what you're about. He's like, I know your weaknesses.

I know I could fucking kill you in a second. I'm not even going to look at your stupid hairless ass. I don't even want to see your non-furry face right now. Meanwhile, meanwhile, your dog makes complete eye contact with you and takes cues from your eyes. Like, like you look over there and he's like,

well, what is it? Like, like he knows what's up. Like I love dogs. I, that's like the bill burr, that bill burr bit,

you know, he has that whole bill burr bit about the dogs. Yeah, or he's like, your friend comes over, and your dog's like, you want me to fucking kill this guy? I also have two dogs, and I posted them there. But, like, I definitely, me and my girlfriend, we have Tootsie. That was my first dog.

He's great. We love him. He's the best, perfect creature. And then we got Goro, like, four months ago. Is Goro the first? Goro's the ch We love him. He's the best. Perfect creature. Then we got Goro four months ago. Is Goro the furry one? The chihuahua. Even in the pictures, Tissy doesn't look cute. He looks like a weird demon with a stick skewered on his tooth.

What a sweet little pup. I love all dogs. Yeah, so these... We literally call them other dog. We're just like, yeah, get Tissy an other dog. The whole joke is just like yeah fuck that oh those are cute fucking dogs to see is good on his like to see because he's like good with us he needs us no matter what he needs people who's the shaggy or oh see that's to see yeah if i put gore when i put him outside like this guy's good he's gonna catch a catch a rabbit. He's going to catch something. He's going to make it till tomorrow.

The other dog never will. So Gorham, I was just like, yeah, you're good, bro. Shut up. But they're so hilarious. Could kill a rabbit? No. Listen, he's very impressive. The pictures you have, he's a puppy.

He's a puppy. But he is like, he's very fast. have his puppy his puppy but he is he is like he's like he's very fast he's got some skills you know i remember looking at the history of like the other dog the uh it's a yorkshire terrier i'm telling you that chihuahua killer that chihuahua is fast i'm telling you but the thing is like if you asked if you asked him if he could kill a rabbit a hundred fucking percent boss you just that's it he's got heart he's got heart kill any rabbit i'll kill you he's not gonna kill humans anybody they gotta fuck with goro

he literally he is like i remember looking up like yorkshire terriers because the dog so useless i was like what are these dogs what was their function because i remember i get i got high once and i saw like hunting with dogs and it hit me i was like oh man's best friend because i did think it was like a hallmark type thing that's's cute. Shut the fuck up, man's best friend. Yeah, I get it. We like them. No, like the relationship that humans have with dogs is like better than any other relationship out there on Earth, which I'm sure when we're like, yeah, man's best friend, dogs, horses are like, I've died for you, bro. I've carried you on my back into war. And those are your friends. Like, I just feel like horses got swerved on the whole man's best friend thing.

But like, I do get it. Like, dogs, like, we got like working relationships. And I looked up Yorkshire Terriers. I was like, what did they do? And they were like, during the plague and stuff, they hunted down rats. Like, they would like go into like little, like they would follow rats into little burrowed holes and like drag them out and stuff they hunted down rats like they would like go into like little like they would

follow rats into little burrowed holes and like drag them out and stuff like you know and i was always like my dog i don't know but my dog's like some la bitch i got him in los angeles he's a useless fucking little hoe they'll do it but i did they've got i did yeah i came across a real york sure terry once and it was the thing. I was standing in an elevator going to my friend's apartment, and the elevator doors opened up. And they must have got like this big, even though the Yorkie was like that big. Most of it was fur, I guess. It opened up this much, and this guy came into the elevator so fast and meant it so much. This was like a real perky yorkie he like came into

the elevator and his nose went into all four corners of the elevator and then he was standing and his nose was in my balls all in like one second it was like so crazy like i could see how he chased his rats his owner didn't even come into the elevator yet the doors weren't even all the way open and he came flying and it was like boom boom boom boom and boom in my balls like he smelled everything everything that was in there that was interesting and he assessed me and he was like in my nutsack and i was just like oh this is it this is like this is like an athletic little dog like he was agile you don't look at yorkies and be like oh yeah they're agile you're just like yeah a little fucking they yap a lot but like i got it my dog is useless but yorkies i was like oh i see and i

my buddy had a yorkie that would do like a flip you would take a treat he never taught it to him he would just do the treat and the dog would do like a flip and it's so funny i was like that's crazy like that's like interesting and then chihuahuas are like, I understand like why people say they're like, they got attitude or whatever. Cause that Yorkie would never, ever, ever growl at me. He's never growled at me in my entire life and I'm irritating and I could bother him. He'll be sleeping and I'll be like, wait, you little bitch, you know? And he's just like, but the chihuahua, when he's sleeping and i just even hover over him he'll be

like like his eyes are closed but he'll start growling at me like he'll growl like he'll never bite anyone but like you go near him when he doesn't want it he's like dude chihuahuas they're fucking ornery like they they're kind of known for being nippy and shitty at people i mean it's not a big deal because unlike like no it's true or some big dog like oh an angry chihuahua whatever like an angry pit bull that's a scary thing but a chihuahua yeah what are you gonna do nip me i can just knock you away dude the most you're one of the most irresponsible friends that I knew in high school was also the guy that had his pitbull. We'd hang out.

I love dogs. I love pitbulls. I happen to think they're one of the most beautiful dogs. I think they're so cute also. They're beautiful and cute and fucking scary. One of my buddies, he'd come there. I'd be like, yo, is this guy coming over? They'd be like, yeah. I'm like, is he bringing his dog and if they're like uh yeah i'm like i'm

not coming because like this guy would come and he'd come with his pitbull not on the leash and he always showed off and i actually found it really fascinating he would like open the gate like a full fence like you know like a seven foot fence like chain link fence he would open the gate and close it and then call his dog and the dog would just scale the fence instantly and i was always like man that's scary to just see the pitbull climb the fence and hop over and cool and then he had like he thought it was so cool to say code words to the dog that'd be like what is it what is it what is it and then the dog's fucking like face you know when they're like shit goes back and they're like and their face is different

bro for real the guy starts pointing at you he's like yudin yudin my neighbor was Israeli he had a doberman and my mom was like why'd you get a doberman they were nazi dogs that dog's a nazi dog and he's israeli he's like the dog is canadian what do you say this dog just eats juice what are you stupid

the dog would be bred to be like oh jew no they don't fucking know they're like oh man this guy had apples yesterday i'm interested in that yeah dogs are so awesome i i love dogs everybody you guys all like small dogs dogs none of you okay you pick small dogs i picked small dogs but i guarantee if i met your dogs i would love them too i love big dogs too i wish i wish i had the space for big dogs when i was getting it when i got my last dog like i just didn't have the space um you know and i i love big dogs i see big dogs bro like we have a connection my day look at me they're like you fucking animal you fucking animal couch they're like like tall enough that you can hug them and stuff and they put their head on yeah that's good those little motherfuckers they're great

danes so they're like they're tall and uh and then you can squish them like that's something we don't know my family's touchy i guess like you know colin just lay on and put all your weight on the dogs you know just lay on their body pillows or something did you get those um like bladder supplements we talked about i did i she's been doing better so my dog one of them is old and she had a problem with just peeing. And she's just been doing better. I got them. I was inconsistent.

You're supposed to give them to her twice a day. And it's like three pills because she's big twice a day. And I'm doing like once a day sometimes, twice a day other times. I'm not sure how much of a difference it made. But she has been doing better. But yeah, dogs get old. Then they get leaky.

Do you think you'll do... Are you settled into the Great Dane as your dog breed of choice, or do you think you'll ever branch away and try something new? So, last time, I was the one who was like, you know what? Hey, just research, right? Let's just look at other dogs, see if anything else fits what we like in a dog.

And Jackie was like, no, only Great Danes. I'm like, well, I'll be over here looking. And if I find something I think is better, maybe something just different as good, I'll circle back. And after I looked at dogs, I landed on Great Dane again. So there was nothing to do can i throw one into the mix that you might want to consider because they look a bit similar but they're medium sized instead of super sized the weimaraner we had one maybe as a kid she was a mutt uh she was great i love weimaraners i had one as a kid, Sam. Sam was my best buddy. Is it Weimaraner or Weimaraner?

Well, I'm from Georgia, so it's Weimaraner. Okay. It's Weimaraner? It's probably Weimaraner. Anyway, I love that dog. You know who has one or had one anyway? Onslaught from YouTube. Oh, okay.

Oh, man. They're beautiful. I like the silverish ones,'re the gray it's that that's really yeah really shiny almost reflective like glint to their their coat it's and i don't think they shed i think they're maybe one of those hypoallergenic breeds perhaps onslaught's dog was his name was champ and he was so athletic our dog was never that athletic and she got kind of fat and whatever you saw his and he was just like let's play let's catch a deer so you guys want to go catch deers it's like yeah i don't know he just looked like he was always built to get do things very similar to that kind of dog i just posted a picture of of cabapoo puppies i have two cavapoos harley and they are so fucking cute so i don't even honestly

i want to kick their fucking ass i'll tell you that right now i'll kill you i want to i want to but you know what i mean you know how i'm saying like you know we come home and you see it looks like you motherfucker you just want to get it shake it a little like not like a violent shake but just kind of almost a vibrate oh no i like i I like to go and put my hand over his skull gently, but I put it over and he's just there and I'm like, I could fucking kill you right now. I could fucking kill you. And he wants to lick

my hand. I'm talking about murdering him. Looking at this picture of this dog is raising my estrogen levels. We have a harness like that for our dogs to walk them. I get dissed for my dogs all the time. It's not pink. It says Voyager on the front.

And so we put that on them. We took them on a walk the other day. They fucking love it. And you take my dogs on a one-mile walk. And by the end of it, they're like, what is wrong with you? You know how big we are. Stop it. Why did you bring us on this walk?

I'm not as strong as you us on this i'm not as strong as you taylor i'm not as strong as you see that that picture you just posted that's how that's how teddy looked when he was a little smaller very adorable little puppy i i love my dogs i love all dogs yeah i love your dogs too i'll tell you right now yeah they're adorable they love you maybe except the the bad thing is that I bought them right before quarantine began. And so their entire formative months, because it's accelerated because they're dogs,

they weren't around people. And so that's really spooked them and made them less affable towards people. Because now if someone comes over, they're like, we got to bark. We got to bark really loud. What the fuck? Someone's coming to our door. Nobody comes to our door. And so that, you know, they're probably going we got a bark we got a bark really loud what the fuck someone's coming to our door nobody comes to our door and so that you know i hope they're probably going to be ruined forever because of this development and i am almost positive that both of them were abused

before we got them just because like i'll come into like i've had teddy for a year and a half almost and i'll like come in to pet him on top of his head and he's terrified. Like the way a dog behaves if they were smacked or like hit or something from the top. And so it's like you come up from the top and he's so, so frightened of it. I had a girlfriend like that. Yeah, well, she learned when she was at the puppy farm.

Every time I go to pet her on the head. He's bringing down the law on her. Well, you guys want to call it a show? Yeah, I think so. I think so. Harley, where can we find you? YouTube.com slash Epic Mealtime. We upload episodes now again.

Did I say that last time? Yes. Well, they're back. The show's back now yeah we've got muscles glasses on there you guys should go check it out yeah the same muscles glasses

shut up 537 time for me to shut up