Painkiller Already - PKA 549 W/ Harley: Taylor got Married, Sugar Daddy Harley, Heaven vs Hell

Episode Date: June 26, 2021

Push me over. The show has started. PKA 549. Where are we going? This episode of PKA is brought to you by Goat.com and Postmates. A couple of wonderful, wonderful sponsors. Thank them for sponsoring

the episode. So Harley, it's been great. Well, I guess it's been a long time. I don't even know what to say, though. You're married. Woody's smoking weed. Dude, you have no idea.

I thought that that little pen I bought at first was going to be enough to get high once. It turns out it's enough to get high every night. Yeah. For you, for once. A hundred times. What was the thing that you were smoking? Because I haven't the it was a it was a joint was it a pen it was a vape pen called what was it like orange vagina or something like that or vagina it was orange and uh someone mentioned that like even though it's is it steve it's not stevia that though it's... It's not Stevia. That's the sugar.

It's Sativa. Sativa. Thank you. I can't get it right. Even though it's Sativa, it helps you sleep. And this it helps you sleep thing, it does. Wait, Indica's the one that helps you sleep, no?

Yeah, it's the one that'll fucking knock you out, but I'm sure reallyica's the one that helps you sleep, no? Yeah, it's the one that'll fucking knock you out. But I'm sure really any weed is going to relax you. I smoke a lot, and I always get tired. No matter what, it's like, yeah, this will keep you up. And then we smoke this big joint, and I'm like, I don't know, man. I remember in college, not even fully buying into the different strains because

I'd go to my drug dealer in college and he'd be like, this is heavy, heady sativa. And then I'm sitting at home like, well, I hope I'm not too heady to watch Trailer Park Boys. And then it's like, smoke it. And it's like, no, I'm just high. And then you go and you get an indica.

Oh, this is like fucking purple gorilla mist or something. And then, no, I'm just high again then you go and you get an indica oh this is like fucking purple gorilla mist or something and then no i'm just high again over the last seven days i might be the biggest stoner on this show oh i'm glad to hear that man i'm glad i don't know i honeymooned in jamaica you are a tough competition taylor but let me care if you do inhale and keep in your the longer you keep it in your lungs the higher you'll get yeah i found that to be true it also makes you cough a little more so i yeah i can't want that way but someone maybe i saw a youtube comment but they're like what he doesn't hold it long enough but i'm brand new with this i don't know what i'm doing and um but what happens is we'll be like holding it long right away because like like you're so

brand new to it like i don't know what zero tolerance is like anymore. Like, like I have no idea what that would be like with a dad pit for all I know. Like if you'd like held it in your lungs for like five seconds and then like, Oh, I coughed it out. You wouldn't have been able to do the show. I was afraid of that.

That's why I wasn't like, I see. I think that's the show though. That's the show. There were portions of that show last week. I'm sorry. I heard you cut y'all Harley, but the portion's the show though. That's the show. There were portions of that show last week. I'm sorry. I got cut y'all Harley, but the portion of the show where like,

I don't know. There's no topic. It's dead air. I'm leading back like six feet from the camera and I don't really care. I'm okay with, with anything. I remember back in the day, like I had a lot of friends that just had,

they just had a lot of money. Like they would get like a nice fat allowance. They'd like work for their dad for a day and get like a hundred bucks. And they'd spend $50 to get seven grams of weed. And I had like 10 bucks on the weekend. Like I'd have 10 bucks I could spend. And I remember I would go and i would buy like one gram of weed and everyone else said i have all these these big joints and i'd always be like oh like

i hit it one time you know and i hit it one time that's why i'd be like and then i'd be like i like walk away and i'm like and then on the way out i gotta cough it out too like i gotta maximize highness off my one or hit of someone else's joint just like and just like you can get the right hit you're like you know 16 17 dumb you get like a good hit and you're like oh i'm gonna be fucked up forever i wish i had money the high bar cal do you want to go? No, go ahead. You're talking about your first time smoking weed. Really? Go ahead. It's fun. The high part, like there are part times I've wondered if I was even high, you know, last what happens.

We'll be like, Hey, kickstands up at 7am. That's what we said today. So I'm like, I have got to get to sleep. I'm taking the four biggest hits off this thing that I can. Right. So did not like the show doing a big inhale. I'm holding it. I'm holding it. I'm holding it. I cough it out four times and then I'm in bed and I'm like, am I even high?

I don't know. And then I thought about that for 50 minutes. Then I like rolled over or something and tried to like operate my computer. And I was like, yeah, yeah. It took you doing something to be like, oh, okay. Yeah. And I swear that happens with drunk too. If you just sit in a chair and you're fine.

And then you stand up and you're like, whoa, all right. Now I can better gauge how drunk I am. But it does help me sleep for sure. And that's what it's kind of, I've been using it almost as melatonin. Yeah. It's the best sleep aid. That's my, that might be my favorite thing about it. No, there are many things I like about it.

I like smoking it. I don't know about that though for me, because I, when I smoke at night, that's when I'm like, Oh, now I want to do fun things like really no one's gonna bother me like at night like i if i do it during the day it's like hot i'll like lie on the couch and fall asleep like pass out for 30 minutes watching something like oh fuck but like at night when everyone's asleep and i'm smoking that's like probably like i'm gonna roll another one so it's ready and now i'm gonna do all the things I wanted to do. And then I'll take out a book and like stare at it for like one full minute.

Like, Oh my God, I didn't even start reading. Maybe I, maybe I should game. And then I'll put on like something like I've been playing mass effect legendary recently. So like I put on,

there's like decisions or like where you're going to put like your attribute points and something that's like a decision that I might be like, fuck, I don't know. Okay. I'll go with this instead. Like I'm sitting there for like five full minutes, like stressing, like what move am I going to make?

What am I going to do in these games? I'm like, I don't know if gaming's the thing, but I'll chase like that blazing of the night leisure time at night. That's when I maximize my leisure time. And yeah, I don't know. It doesn't even put me to sleep at night anymore i know like i've trained myself to me there's a storyline where you can get we can have sex with aliens right yeah that's all i would do yeah i got high i'm like yeah i'm gonna

get i'm i'm fucking alien tonight instead it's just like it's like you have to kill this person or that person i'm like oh i don't want to kill anyone right now bro i came to fuck aliens bro not kill these people no not really but still it makes it makes games like that a lot more fun for me because like if i'm not high then i'm just like oh let's get to the next thing let's get to the next thing let's get to the next thing and i'm never stopping to like smell the roses and in in some games like um i tried play... Dude, that became obvious with Vermintide when we were playing. You weren't high at all where you're just like, forward!

Vermintide, somebody has to be the fucking general and be like, no, we got to go. If we don't keep moving, a whole new army is going to spawn in on this spot. Do you want to fight 500 enemies or 5 000 enemies this game like it's up to you guys we can piss piss around here for like the next three minutes and they'll just keep coming forever time is no points yeah

yeah catch me sober in a video game like like online and i'll be that guy i'll be like yo what's the move and i'll be you're the highest level you should lead us like you know i'm old playing a game i don't i'm not here to lose let's work through this and do it you know we're not chilling my friends aren't here they got kids and i'm coming here to win uh i played i downloaded which is there's there's two right yeah i downloaded the second one i think on xbox one yeah it was uh it was a cool ass game i didn't ever got far in it though we um i got pretty obsessed with it on pc um and uh i didn't get to max level um we got bored before that yeah i think i had like like um i think i had like three of the top tier like uh

slots filled and everything else was like one tier below that like i don't remember what that is but like i had like a diamond tier net whatever whatever top tier is it's like amber or something or orange red okay red yeah i had like three red things and everything else was maybe the other three or four were like whatever's right below that orange or amber yeah for sure yeah i was close to maxing out but but but not all the way and uh and that's kind of hard to do we were playing a lot and and i i could actually get back into it right now i i might play a little bit later on like i'm just talking about is gonna make me want to play i like firming time it's really fucking fun i like it's fun to play with because like so i'll have a character that doesn't

have a distance weapon and you can just call them out like kyle your sorcerer on it and it's like it's fun you just like kyle's very good so you can point them at problems and get them solved yeah that's the only one that says time yeah you're late i'm doing my laundry i'll be right back let me push it in the dryer oh okay i like i like that everybody so some games have like um different characters have like different classes but really by the like end game everybody's a jack of all trades anyway it's like yeah yeah i'm a sorcerer but now my battle axe cuts dragons in half and or it'll be like yeah i'm the i'm the uh the troll king but now i've got magic that can summon a thousand trolls too it's like no let's just stay in our fucking lane here and actually have a class system and that's what vermintide does right because like the elf is okay with her

daggers but mostly it depends which elf you pick but it's it's it's mostly about that bow like like she's so good with the goddamn bow um that's a really fun game and i'm so fucking excited because like the uh the sequel the 40k sequel is going to come out and I'm going to have dope. I'm going to be, I'm going to be one of the highest ranked players on the planet in that game. When that shit comes out, it's going to be like me and, I can't remember the YouTube double entendre,

one of the highest ranked players. Yes. I will be the highest ranked player. Um, not the highest ranked player, the highest ranked player. You guys can ranked player, but the highest ranked player. You guys can figure that out. Some of you are scratching your heads right now.

That's because you got a low IQ. But it's going to be a lot of fun. It's going to be a lot of fun. I'm looking forward to it. Oh, it was me scratching my head for a second. I was like, oh, yeah. I'm so excited for that game. It's basically, Harley, it's basically,

are you familiar with the Warhammer universe at all? No, but I'm so excited for that game. It's basically, Harley, it's basically, are you familiar with the Warhammer universe at all? No, but I'm familiar, but I'm not at all. So Vermintide is based on Warhammer fantasy. And so basically that's like, it's a similar universe, but it's also different at the same time. Warhammer 40K is this really crazy sci-fi thing. That's based off of the tabletop game where it, it,

it's this 40,000 years of alternate human history. Like the timeline is fleshed out really well. It's not like, Oh yeah. And then 5,000 late 5,000 years later, we did this. It's like, no.

And then the next year we spoke about total Total War Warhammer, you and I. Remember? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys were playing it, and you told me I should download it, and then I was like, I downloaded it. So I know a little bit, but yeah. Yeah, 40k is the futuristic version of that, essentially. And so that's what this new Vermintide-ish game,

it's called Darktide, I believe, is going to be based on. Do you know when it comes out? Oh, that's cool. I like that. That's what I would need for that, that extra. I like that. Yeah.

That's cool. It looks really, really cool. And I want to say the gore is pretty high on it, too, like almost no combat level gore. It says 2021. So this year. I think it's fall. So I'm not exactly sure.

Hopefully. But, yeah, it's going to be basically Vermintide, and they're going to keep a lot of the melee stuff in there because the melee is so cool, the way you just slash. That's what I was worried about because the melee animation, it's just neat. I think ammo is going to be a concern.

I think that's how they're going to keep that balanced. They don't use chainsaw swords? Is that this? Yeah, there is a chainsaw sword in the 4K version. Oh, yeah, that's cool. You don't make a chainsaw sword and then bail on that at any point in your series. I feel like that's a cool thing. I'm excited about that game.

I'm excited for Battlefield 2042. I mean, I played every Battlefield. I played the bad ones. I liked Hardline, which I always thought was like Battlefield Arcade. Can I ask you as a Battlefield aficionado, it's been my impression that Battlefield smashes it when it comes to the trailers. And then the games are a little hit and miss.

Whereas COD almost always misses on the trailers. But sometimes it's not a bad game. I think Call of Duty single players, I'm always like, ah, Call of Duty, whatever. And then they they have a new like they they put the trailer out and i do get excited for the single players a lot and then i play the shit out of the multiplayer for like a month two months sorry my teeth but you still have to play for a month two months and uh i have plastic things on my teeth by the way if you guys see me doing some weird shit with my mouth, I'm not like... Wait, you got Invisalign? Yeah, I did, like three months ago.

But I speak like a fucking idiot sometimes. Yeah. Yeah, I was playing... I play every Call of Duty when they come out. I think they're so cool. The single player is awesome. I played the shit out of the multiplayer for two months. But Battlefield, like, I boot up Battlefield 4.

You'll never catch me booting up Black ops one to go hop online right now um i play battlefield uh uh you know uh one battlefield four i even downloaded battlefield three their servers up would you ever go and download like black ops one and hop on before it could are there servers up for cod four still or can that not be played online? Oh, Kyle, you're muted. Kyle's muted. I could see myself bouncing back to COD 4. Yeah, not only is it up, but they remade it two, three years ago with Modern Warfare.

So you've got an updated version that I quit playing right away as soon as they started putting new guns in. Don't put guns in. Don't add guns to COD 4. Oh, I hate that. What did they add?

They added a bunch of stuff. Was it stuff that kind of ruins the balance? Because I liked the gun balance. I thought it did. I liked that it was unbalanced. I liked that. That's what was good. If you wanted, there was the MP5, the M16, or the M40A3,

and you didn't fuck with LMmgs unless it was the rpd sometimes if you were trying to have fun and get a cool like a cool kill feed and that was about it yeah i mean you can go outside that a little bit like like there were some classes you could do you could use juggernaut and a dragon off because the dragon off would because in like sniper duels if they had an m40 they would try to body like chest shot kill you but you would know that they can't and that you can't so you'd go for the headshot like you would have you would have the information advantage on on how to do a one shot and also it kicked weird i hated that up into the right i think yeah do you guys play battle do any of

you guys play battlefield did you ever i played a lot of bad company too um which that's like maybe the best battlefield by the way maybe the best battlefield and it like got me pretty hyped on battlefield uh and then the next one came out and i don't remember what it was called but i was just like oh man battlefield three or battlefield four i think and i didn't have anybody to play with and if you don't have any like a squad to play with like like i played that company with like blame truth and xcal a little bit and uh and you know when you're playing with like crazy slayers in a game it's it's always fun like i remember playing zombies with like xcal and chiz chiz was a great zombies player by the way if nobody remembers and it was just like so so this is why everybody likes this you just go round

after round like deep into the game on like nocturne totem or some shit and it's just like oh no that's not what it's like when you when you don't play with some of the best players in the world it's it's i remember the first time i played zombies with blame truth xcal and it was me and maybe someone maybe it was chiz i don't recall but this was 10 years ago like literally 10 11 years ago and i remember like getting in there and i didn't know blame truth didn't know xcal only knew chiz and it was just like all right you know maybe i'll i'll do pretty good i know these guys are good i i had the worst zombies game of my life like one of those like where you you like really overextend yourself and dare rice or whatever it was and it's like i got

every fucking thing and then you like accidentally fuck up your stutter jump and you get stuck and die and i remember like xcal just like bullying me like just like being like you fucking suck and like the truth like i didn't know him at all but he just like kept picking me up like it's all right man it's just a game who cares and i'm like i like this guy i like this guy a lot morebag. That was the last time I spoke to Xcal. Yeah. Xcal. Xcal has aged into a nicer guy, I think. I watch his live stream sometimes and he's nice to me. But yeah, he

used to be kind of a douchebag. Chiz, one thing I like about his zombies. He wasn't being like shit anymore. Chiz is a reviver, man. Maybe Taylor was in this position where you're kind of behind and almost just like you lost all your stuff and now it's around 32 and it's kind of hard to get back on your feet again so you're that poor soul who had 32 like downs yeah then you look at chis he's got 28 revives like he's that guy who just yeah say at the end of every game you're looking at the kills and Chiz is always like, look at those revives, man.

Yes. That's me in every game. Every time there's a game where there's a healer or something, they're always lacking and I always enjoy it. I've never played an hour off of any other character in Overwatch other than

Mercy and I healed the shit out of everyone the damage but all the time battlefield 5 revive everybody i go like i'm a medic with like you carry smokes in battlefield and no one really carries like you could have five smoke grenades in battlefield where it's like huge open fields and there's no one like i smoke out a whole field and like he'll pick people up that were dead are now like a little white walker army that like got back up and we're going to a point like medics change the games and there's really like like when they battlefield for the assault guy was the medic also which was just like so everyone

was the medic um because you wanted to carry the assault stuff the the assault guns but playing as medic battlefield five battlefield one like i was all over that shit i i will die defending that battlefield is a far superior multiplayer experience than call of duty but i know that call of duty is like a million times more popular so it's like a hot take by default and i also know call of duty i could see how it's better for competition like six on six or however they do it yeah and you got the three lanes it's like three lane style comet battlefield is like the last one kyle played bad company too you could blow up the whole level so like it's not like a competition type thing but

the battlefield games like when you see the trailer they always make it a point to try and show you things that can be done in, in, in battlefield. Like, you know, you guys saw the, the guy that ejects out of the jet and shoots the rocket and lands back into the plane. Yeah. That was,

that's real. That's really cool that they threw that in there. Cause that's a thing that like, I think the first time it got done was like 2016 or something like that. Like it's, it's several years ago now, but that's so incredible when you see someone do that in-game. Like, they eject out of their fighter jet, whip out an RPG, and turn around and shoot the fighter jet that was, like, tailing them, blow it up, and then land.

I've seen it done both ways, where they either land on their own jet and recover it or steal the jet of the guy they killed with the rocket. They'll snipe the guy out of the sniper and then take his or the rock the rocket but like yeah it's uh like i love that game like that's a game where like whenever people will like jump like i'll be playing the game and people be like oh like what's up with battlefield i look at it i'm like when you're like on the battlefield and a plane is going by in a dog fight and like tanks you're always just like there's like four guys in there and there's like three guys in that plane and everything's blowing up like it's just i it always gets compared to call of duty and i think it's the biggest mistake to both games even though i did it i was like it's better than quality i just like that style game better the gunplay is just harder the bullets are

slower and they drop and then it's just 64 on 64 they've really figured that out the next one's going to be 128 people like i'm very prepared for that it's completely different that's why it's completely different you can't but when you do that's when you're god i don't think you're that guy on in the plane you're the guy in the plane and and you just do it or even you're on the aa and no one's flying planes because you're like or even if you're just me like epic heel time running around picking guys up off the ground like you always feel like you could do something and if you're shit at games support like battlefield pays for everything like if you shoot in the direction of five guys that your teammates are

shooting and you don't hit a single bullet battlefield knows you did that and they're like suppression assist plus 10 points man and like that to me that's important like you were like you brought up how chis because that doesn't matter yeah it didn't it you said chisel pick people up like in college like you want to pick people up in battlefield it's uh it's gonna get you paid like to do that you know anything like building a fortification or blowing one up everything so even like when i'm shit at a battlefield like when i'm first getting into it then i'm like lmg is like lying down shooting where the guys are and everyone gets ammo everyone gets ammo and you get like a score it's never sometimes it's nice to be like one of the guns you might not like have that match i was talking about where you had an impact but you did did you ever get a question of it all i what do you want to did you

ever get into uh tarkov at all so uh we spoke about this about this a bunch i've gotten my ass kicked in it every time but i was actually streaming last night and i finished at like 5 a.m and everyone i follow is not on but pistilli was so i just sent like a raid like to to him and as soon as it came and he was like oh shit you're on pka all the time he's like what's up and in the chat i was like yeah man uh we spoke about you a bunch so i ended up following him and he was like yeah and then he wanted to know woody why you don't stream anymore he mentioned taylor streams but he was like, why doesn't Woody stream? He's like, it's been a long time.

I kind of fell out of love with streaming a bit, and I fell into some real life stuff, like motorcycles and paramotors. Well, my first thought was you were getting more fit, and you were going to do your motorcycle thing. So I was just like, yeah, Woody's up to a whole bunch of things all the time that's what i typed in that's true and he was like yeah but streaming is just easy to do man just pop it on the stream i was like i don't know when i streamed i was going to bed at like 3 and 4 a.m all the time well you gotta get those hours up that's nothing man when i stopped streaming you know like my

sleep schedule got fixed, which helped me get my diet fixed, which helped me exercise. There was a whole lot of good stuff that happened for me, even if I wasn't streaming anymore. I still think about it all the time. I think about streaming on these trips. Maybe I'll stream after the show. We'll see. When you talked about the destructible environments of Battlefield,

that's what reminded me of Tarkov because they showed off the new map the other day, Streets of Tarkov, it's got like walls that you can like blow out like like you can explode the walls and create new pathways through these uh is that streets or lighthouse that that's in i'm not sure i'm almost positive it's streets um it's uh but but you know i i watched the video like uh being i watched um landmark like watch the video and like comment on it so i could be a little off do you watch it's nice guy but it's spelled noise guy n-o-i-c-e uh maybe once or twice but not i couldn't picture him in my head it yeah i don't think he's done a face reveal but if you like tarkov and you're interested in keeping up with

what's going on noise guy makes i think he pronounces it nice guy, makes the best videos on it. They're often like three to six minutes is kind of his sweet spot. He talks quickly and he lays it all out there. He doesn't get it wrong much. He will say like, hey, this isn't really confirmed, but this is what I'm thinking.

These are the clues. And I still watch every one of his videos, even though I'm not playing Tarkov anymore, because I still feel like a Tarkov player just waiting for time to get sucked back in. Yeah. Yeah. I feel the same way. Wipe is about to happen. They're doing a lot of events right now. Right now, I don't know if you know but they're doing um all of the bosses are on reserve at the same time yeah yeah i saw landmark killed them all at once the wipe's not confirmed by the way it's not confirmed but this is clear i don't know anything about i only was gonna i thought that in my head because that's what the chat was saying they were like hitting

him with that question constantly they were like tell us pastille is the wipe gonna happen is the wipe true and i was like i don't know what the fuck they're talking about but now you guys i guess it's like like a rust thing like how on rust like the yeah to zero and they yeah they take everything from you and the thing in tarkov is you've got these uh these quests that you're doing to like rank up andanking up matters because it allows you to get access to these traitors that are in the game. It's like this wall between you and getting ammo that actually fucking works. Literally, there are helmets that you could shoot 10 times, maybe 20 times you could shoot an Alton

with bullshit 9mm, and the guy would just be like, bling, bling, bling, bling, bling, bling, bling, bling. And it has face coverage too like a big face shield comes down like he's a god damn tank even if you've got a 5.5 A1 M16 ammo like a couple of them will bounce off

his head you need like armor piercing ammo did they make the currency for the game bitcoin so the main currency is rubles but uh they do have a bitcoin mechanic where you can uh and it's actually the thing that i grinded for the most was where um there are gpus in the maps and i don't recall the exact number but like if you get enough gpus you can power up your bitcoin farm in your stash okay people were talking about bitcoin and i was like this is such a crazy like

like niche audience that also i'm like bro tarkov people are obsessed with bitcoin yeah and i'm like looking at the chat and they're talking about bitcoin and all that and then i'm like oh is this an in-game mechanic but it's also like 5 30 a.m for me so i'm like the currency in this game is ridiculous there's it's mostly rubles like kyle. There's also USD, there's also euros, and then there's Bitcoin and GP coins, whatever they are. But mostly, you just sell the Bitcoin and GP coins for either in-game items or rubles. You can make Bitcoin with one GPU, he said, but you can store as many as 50 and you make them more quickly. Yeah. Yeah. So it's one of those things that keeps you grinding because you've got this Bitcoin farm and it's like, all right, I need if I've got like I'm just making up numbers here because I remember the exact ones. But 10 bitcoins will or 10 GPUs will net me like a half a Bitcoin a day, but 20 GPUs and I can get three quarters of one and 30.

I'm getting like one and a half bitcoins a day. Let me jump in with numbers like this is interesting coming through. It used to be one GPU would get you a Bitcoin every day, right? About that. It was like 23 hours. Cool. 50 GPUs would get you about five coins a day. The Bitcoin, the value of a Bitcoin is tied into the real life value of a Bitcoin. Well, in real life, Bitcoin skyrocketed and broke the Tarkov economy. Instead of grinding and getting five bitcoins a day,

it now takes 141 hours to make a single bitcoin so that they nerfed the bitcoin farm. Which was the stupidest way to do it. The stupidest way to do it. What they're going to do is to not tie it to real world bitcoins because Stupidest way to do it. The stupidest way to do it. Well, what they're going to do is...

The smart way to do it is to not tie it to real world Bitcoins because then you're constantly chasing the ball. What if the next day Bitcoin dropped to $20,000 and it stayed there forever? Now they've got to completely redo their mechanic again. Two things. One, I thought it was neat that it was tied to the real life Bitcoin and went up and down and you could kind of guess and play the market like with your own stuff like you know what i'm gonna pocket bitcoins and then cash them all out next week because i think it's gonna go up like i think it's neat but like you said it's not good for the game's economy they did it with weather at one point too at one point the weather in tarkov was actually tied in to like

moscow weather but it sucked because it rained way too much and people didn't like the game they had like a monsoon season or something in moscow for a couple months and everybody's like i'm so sick and tired of rain yeah so they changed the weather so it's not linked anymore now it's just the balance they're looking for and they're changing it it's not going to be bitcoin it's going to be like tarkov coin or something so good good good or make it dogecoin i don't care but like don't tie it to a real world value then you're always chasing the ball you're always behind on like you're trying to fine-tune a balance but but like part of the equation is a floating ball that has no that you can have zero impact on so like you can never be right yeah well you're right

i agree i i just think it was a neat concept that didn't work out neat concept didn't work out um i impact on. You can never be right. You're right. I agree. I just think it was a neat concept that didn't work out. Neat concept that didn't work out. I agree with that. Tarkov is the king of games for me. It's just so addictive and requires so much grinding that it's an unhealthy obsession. I don't play Tarkov. Right now, I'm playing

Poker with my friends, playing Magic the Gathering. Like real magic with cards? Yeah. Playing on Arena. We've been doing weekly tournaments in our Discord. Doing another one Saturday, by the way. Everybody listening up.

Also doing the Hangout. Any of you who didn't check your email, you got your links for the hangouts coming up and um make sure you sign up ahead of time get a good spot uh and yeah but we've been playing a ton of magic the gathering arena i've gotten pretty obsessed with it youtube knows i'm obsessed with it because they're recommending videos from the biggest fucking nerds on the planet playing this game this guy um what's his name um fuck what's that youtuber

i watch the guy you said like he jokes about having a punchable face i joke about him having a punchable face covert go blue i thought that i imagined him sitting there like you know me i have a punchable face like ah the dude knows he's got a punchable face like like if it's who does covert go blue uh if this gets back to him man, I do like the content. You're one of the best in the business. Um, but if it gets back to him, but I would, I would pay money to just punch you right in the fucking face.

Cause you got the most punchable face ever. Um, and, you just, you just, you just real obnoxious looking guy. Um, but,

but I love your content. I watch it every day. Daily. I watch it. I copy your deck lists. I play them. I love them. Smart guy. The sincerest form of flattery. You're copying his deck. Absolutely. Yeah copy your deck lists. I play them. I love them. Smart guy. The sincerest form of

flattery. You're copying his deck lists. Absolutely. It's true. It cancels out the face punching comments. I would pay as much money as I've spent buying fucking Magic the Gathering cards just to sock you one good one. Who is this? Ryan the Kisser. His name is CovertGoBlue.

I'll link him. He's not going to give two fucks about you saying no i don't give a fuck but he'll he'll be like oh he copies my deck list knew it yeah man he knows i'm better this guy's punching back and like and like his competition is like this guy with who's like i don't know icelandic or something and his his his accent is so his accent is obnoxious like like i can listen to Covert Go Blue for hours at a time. And I do. Like one of his main competition is like this guy, like, God, I can't stand his voice.

Like I wouldn't care if his decks made you win every time. I can't listen to him for more than three seconds. Just awful. But Covert Go Blue, really good content. Really smart guy. I enjoy it. Is it hard to come up with your own decks? Like, yeah.

Yeah. So there are, depends what you want to do and it depends what mechanic you want to exploit and what i mean by that is like there's a card called winota right and what it does is whenever you're attacking with a non-human creature winota allows you to draw i believe it's the top six cards from your deck look at them and any cards that are amongst those six cards that are also non-human creatures, you get to play those instantly, and they begin attacking instantly. So that's the mechanic behind that. So the strategy is to get out two, three, four, if you can, non-human creatures, then play Winota, and then attack, so that you trigger that multiple times so you're

able to go into your deck multiple times draw six cards pick out x amount of non-human creatures they all go on the board and it's like this knockout blow that you can deliver on turn four and there are many many mechanics like that in magic pause there that seems easy to figure out like oh here's one that makes non-human characters all attack if they're on the board. So I'll just pair it up with a bunch of non-human characters. You need... I've never played Magic, but it seems like I could have figured that

one out. And part of it is figuring out which ones to use, because there's a million useful non-human creatures that are useful attacking. But what they do is they are like, alright, well, a lot of these guys have to be cheap, because we need to front load our position on the board so that it's not just winota and then just you don't want this winota creature attacking alone and then you what if you don't draw six now your opponent just goes oh it isn't well then i'm thinking i don't have one of

those yeah it's it's pretty it's like it's one of the most meta dueling blade thing the one that gives everybody attacking double yeah there's a dual blade binder or something like that. He gives everyone double strike. He's in there at four mana. You want to draw him with your Winota trigger, but you use things like Sacrificial Savior or whatever, that little dog. You use things like Elite Spellbinder.

Sacrifice, that guy's annoying. But that's what it is, I guess, to say, Woody. So that Winota deck he's talking about, there's a couple key pieces that build out a skeleton, and then you can edit around it and figure out and optimize. So I play a... I have a dozen decks on there now. I went bananas with it.

Same. But I have a Mono Green deck, and I love it because nobody in the Discord plays Mono Green because it's so out of meta. And I just tinkered with it and messed around with it and i got it working really well and so basically it's like you just pick a keyword or you pick a tactic and then you find basically through the search on the engine everything in that color that has to do with that and then this is the way i do it and then i scroll through every card available i'm like oh this is like a common that says every time this hits the battlefield or dies i get to put a

one one creature token okay all right maybe i can do something where i manipulate that where i can get a bunch of replays or return to my maybe i pair it with blue and i return this to my hand and play it again and i get some loop going to where i punish my opponent and it's better if it's not fully meta because like if it's fully meta i'll know like you know pretty quickly like oh i know exactly what this person's going to do turn four they're going to try this turn five they're going to try this if they throw you like a look like if somebody's playing black green fusion on there right now you're like okay the fuck are you thinking what are you doing i don't know what to expect like the one i described the one i

described woody you're right it is very simple, and that's why I chose that one because it's the simplest to describe. Some of the combos and some of the tactics and metas are so complicated that they require 80 or 100 card decks to do, and it would be difficult to me to— But no players would even get it. I can't explain it is the real problem. And even though I could, you wouldn't understand it.

The reason I can't explain it is because I don't understand it. There's also ways to shut down meta. One of the last times I played Dirty, for example, he has this white life gain deck. He's still playing that deck? He's still playing that. Dirty, Dirty, Dirty, get a new goddamn deck. You're a one-trick pony.

At this point, you've been playing for months now. You have one trick more than me. What the fuck is wrong, Dirty? Get a new deck. I would get bored of playing the same deck. But basically, I know, because he always plays that, I went back and changed my mono red deck to put four creatures in whose game text is like,

as long as this creature's on the field opponents cannot gain life and he doesn't have a way to get rid of that guy as quickly as he needs to because you know that causes problems for him and so like you can throw a wrench into people's plans a lot easier so if you're totally mono focused on life gain and he wastes his removal on bullshit early in the game and then i play someone that prevents him from gaining life he may have he may have 20 and I may have 6, but the table's turned. In one turn, he'll have 6 and I'll have 6. In one turn after that,

I'll have 1, even if he eliminates that guy. Putting up hedges, putting up blocks, anticipating their move. It's so much fun. I fucking love Magic. I'm looking forward to hanging out with Dirty in Colorado. It's going to be fun. Poker and Magic from that guy. I love Poker. We've got a poker table at the house. We've got a poker table. I won't go into all the amenities. It's going to be fun. Poker and magic from that guy. Loves cards. We got a poker table at the house. We got a poker table.

I won't go into all the amenities. It's sick though. It has all of the cool things that you can imagine. It's expensive, right? Like seven grand? I mean, it's seven grand for two weeks though, right? For a five bedroom house. I think it's super cheap as far as-

I'm not saying it's above the going rate. Oh, it's a lot of money. Yeah. It's a lot of money. Split between a lot of people. Although right now it's split between me because I paid and nobody has sent me their money yet. I might be hanging out at this place like I wish I could afford weed.

I waited so long. All I have is this resin I found. Under the couch. Someone left a dirty bong behind. Yeah, it was like 7,000. It was more than that, actually. But, you know, it's two weeks in like a five, six-bedroom house or something like that. And it's got a lot of amenities that we all really value.

And it's close to everything. It's in South Denver. So it's cool. lot of amenities that we all really value. And it's close to everything. It's in South Denver. So it's cool. And I don't know. I think it's going to be a lot of fun. We've got a lot of people going. I think we split it into two weeks. And initially I thought, like, all right, we'll have this group on week one

and this group on week two. But so many of the guys are just like, can I stay for both weeks? Yeah. Yeah. You can stay for both. So, like, Fish is staying so like fish is staying for you can just carve out two weeks yeah yeah that's why i love these guys that's what's interesting about like 50 patrons these are the kind of people who can carve out two weeks in their schedule no problem and people who blow 50 to hang out with us lead interesting lives yeah yeah and so the funny thing is like i got a one-way flight because i'm not sure exactly when $50 to hang out with us lead interesting lives. Yeah.

Yeah. And so the funny thing is like, like I got a one way flight cause I'm not sure exactly when I want to come back. So like, you know, I'm definitely staying like a whole month, but like at the end of that month, what if I'm just like,

man, I wish I wasn't going home tomorrow. I might find like, like a cheap Airbnb that's like $80 a night or something like that. And be like one more week. Just live in squalor, be high as hell, though. Yeah, sure. Why not? And I can

do this from there. I'm bringing all my shit with me, so it's fine. Wait, you can do this job remotely? It seems that way. The boss doesn't mind. I've talked to him. It's all good. I've changed time zones four times in the last two days. There you go. I can hardly figure out what times in the last two days. I can hardly

figure out what time it is. I don't know. It's going to be fucking sick. I'm going to stay for a long time. Oh, what I was going to say is I was like, yeah, I booked one way and Fitch is like, I'm going to book one way too. I'm like, all right, man. All right, let's do it up. And Chiz

is like, I'm staying at least 30 days. I mean, it's my birthday month. I'm staying at least 30 days i mean it's my birthday month i'm staying at least my birthday birth month i like it like a 14 year old girl it's my birthday month yeah you know he's in colorado for his birthday anyway so like he was already planning a whole thing he's driving in he's driving his uh he's driving all the way from uhi to Denver. Middy, he's driving down from Minnesota. He's going to stay a week with us. That's not too bad.

Four hours maybe off the top of my head. Just guessing. Minnesota's pretty long though. I don't know where he is in Minnesota. That's a good point. ZT is coming all the way from Athens, Georgia. Pretty close to me. He's got quite a little journey to make. I don't know.

There's a bunch of dirties coming from South Carolina. It's going to be a good fucking time. I think we're going to have five to six of us in that house per week, no matter what. That splits the cost of the place up to the point where it's like 600 a week per person, 700 a week per person, something like that. I am so excited to get high. I'm so glad it's almost over. I'm a big fan.

Let me see how many days I've got because I think it's 98 days. It's either 98 or 90. Do you get high all the time now? Me? Not all the time. For the last seven days, like five of them. Are you still in Seattle? I'm in a legal state.

Is that where you were? You shut up. I doxed you. I can't believe I just doxed you. Yeah. That's bad. I could find out exactly where you are, by the way. I know how to do it, too. No, you don't. I do. Do it, then.

You want me to say it? I want you to type it. You've got 99 days, by the way. Man's in my house. He does have powers. Four hours. Nine minutes. Yeah, but they have those hotels in every state, right?

Yeah, this is a very popular hotel. Okay. That checkerboard background has got existence in Belgium. Okay. What should I say? No, I won't. I'll tell you later. You can type it, and you're not typing it, so you don't know.

I did type. You didn't see that? Yeah, but you didn't tell me where I am. You just told me your method. And you said it out loud back. That wasn't me who said that. Oh, I would stay in a bad area. You're wrong right there.

I'm kind of famous for it. Maybe not. You are also really discounting. Maybe if someone would, they would go to 12 different. They go for a little tour. And then you're like, we're in the room? No, I'm not that. Listen, their strategy on how they handle it from there, whatever.

I was just saying I could find out where. Yeah. Hang out. they'll hang out outside oh by the way if anyone i feel like your audience if anyone did do that by the way what we're talking about you're a fucking loser just gonna say that right now in case someone did i do i understand like always being careful but i'd be really disappointed in someone if they did stand out and you walk there so they're like what did i did i found out the whole tire i went all around town i'd be like you're fucking weirdo like they're the fucking champ is it what's that game called where you uh you look at the picture of somewhere on the planet and you guess where oh yeah yeah geo something geo guesser okay yeah like they're the geo guesser champs they like look at woody's hotel room like aha why did i even ask about the state anyways that i mentioned why was i i don't know the reason i didn't answer was oh yeah we were smoking there that's that's the first place i ever bought

weed legally uh when it first started and i remember going in and being like yo so we could just buy weed in here from you and I could leave with it. And they're like, yeah. And I'm like, this is fucking crazy. And on the way out, they gave you like an orange crush or like any cold drink, but they had like flavors like orange crushing Mountain Dew and Sprite. And I was like, this is such a high combination of soda cans. Yeah. Like you get a cold one.

I'm like, this is perfect. Like, I can't believe it. You know, like, like buying weed was very bait growing up for me. And now here I am. They're like, and a soda on the way out. And by the way, everyone is fucking nice there. I remember the first time I bought legal weed and it feeling

like, are they going to drop a metal cage over me as soon as I get to the checkout counter? You feel like you're getting away with something. It's such a good feeling where you're like, so I can just buy hundreds of dollars of this? And they're like, yeah. It's that show with the bike where they put the bike

and then someone gets on the bike and they're like, fucking get her. You know that show? I only see it in the hotels when I'm in the States. For some reason, when I first went to a legal dispensary and I just kept adding things to my total, I kept imagining like well they're gonna say no at some point like but like no it's like walmart you can walk in and as long as you got money like this is canada though in canada where i live in quebec it's

just they really they really took it and just kind of made it lame there's a couple things oh no no edibles no edibles allowed it's a travesty i know and i i eat a lot of edibles because they really they're funny they're super funny they really fuck me up great um i no edibles but you can get drinks we drinks and those taste like you have 130 gram limit per visit which is fine you know like okay 130 grams but the problem is they have equivalency like like uh like there's like a like i buy hash a three and a half of hash and it has the equivalency of 18 grams of marijuana so when i'm buying like a whole bunch of hashes that fills up to the 130 really quickly especially because the drinks they market per millimeter

unlike uh like like what's actually in it like if you were going over the border and you had like 10 grams of wheat and you got caught going over the border with 10 grams of weed they'd be like ah 10 grams you're arrested but if you took 10 grams of wheat and cooked it into like two pounds of brownies and go over the border they They're like, ah, two pounds of weed. You're arrested. And they applied that like in the reverse to like getting it. So when I went in, I had to like split the purchases in two.

I asked the guy, I was like, so if I like is this per day? And he was like, no, per visit. And I was like, so if I pay and I leave and come back, I could buy this. He's like, sounds like another visit to me. And I was like, that's so crazy. Why do we have to make things dumb like this?

I'll buy it, and this is my first visit of the day, and then I'll loan it to you, but bring it back tomorrow. It's because there was some policy made by a 79-year-old who had no idea what they were doing. Some old fucking idiot. Some dumbass. that doesn't even

glaze like woody and us i'm like i'm like fucking idiot colorado has like the has some kind of a recreational limit i don't remember what it was like what you could buy at a time but it was like half an ounce or something like that maybe and i just remember us being like at the store and me being like all right half an ounce for me and half an ounce for her and i'm paying for it all you know just bring a friend with you oh no she has the same exact taste as me and every item yeah double it up my dog gets high my dog has glaucoma look at him look at this video i'm running into a wall if you've been if you've been smoking a lot and like you build up your tolerance from what i heard at least from my experience and the explanation that i heard

is uh you like you know can smoke tons of weed or hash whatever i like smoke hash um and then you try edibles you're ingesting it in a different way so it's a whole new tolerance mechanism because it's different so um oh i didn't know that i found this whole thing that like like yeah edibles could fuck me up but i got this new thing i like doing woody you should totally try it uh is i call it getting scared bad advice incoming yeah yeah i know exactly what you're gonna say 100 okay and if you're listening to this and you don't feel like getting scared because it sounds like bad advice you're a bitch okay because i do it and i and honestly i could be a bitch sometimes over things but you know what you got to just find the right time to get scared

uh what you do is and the whole thing is literally about being a bitch, by the way, is I got this like Tootsie Roll, for example, when I was in LA. And it's like broken into six pieces. And they're like, one piece will fuck you up. And everyone's like, this is the craziest edible. So I ate the whole Tootsie Roll. So it was like six times. Literally, it was like 300 milligrams.

And people take like five milligrams and they're like i'm high or like so like i'm doing 30 milligrams you're gonna get fucked up or like 50 milligrams you know yeah um so i'm doing 300 yeah i would just take the whole thing and i would be so fucked up and i'm like so i'm like in la and i'm like walking to this movie with this this buddy of mine this guy eric and he's got like long hair i met him online actually uh which sounds crazy but i met you fuckers online that's how we met it's his name online was meth syndicate and so i met him and he makes t-shirts and stuff and we were hanging out we hung out a bunch of times but we went i'm like yo we got to get scared you know

i got to eat all this so i ate this wholeie roll. We're walking in LA and the sun's getting hotter and hotter. And then I get this stress. Like I got to get to the movie theater because at this, like it's in Hollywood. So the movie theater, like if you're, if the movie's at 3 PM and you come in at three Oh five, they don't let you in. And the idea of taking all these edibles now and being so high and not being allowed to get in i'm like scared so i'm like already like we gotta rush we gotta get there we're rushing to the movie the sun's getting hotter i'm feeling it all i'm starting to panic a little bit you know and i turn the corner and a friend of mine that i haven't seen since like like literally the 11th

grade like when we graduated is there and he's like yo harley and i look and he's like at the table with this like like 65 year old woman who instantly at a stoned glance is like hot enough that and or like she looked rich enough but not it was a combination where i'm like is she paying my friend to be on this date like maybe he's paid to be here and he's like you didn't assume it was your mom his mom and i know i know him very well from high school and i'm like and we live in montreal also so i'm seeing him in la and like you know and i see him and he's there and i'm like tripping and i'm like i'm like i can't talk to you now i gotta get to the movie and they're not gonna let me in i mean he's like go go go whatever the hell you're saying and i like stumble off we get to the movie and they're not going to let me in. I mean, he's like, go, go, go,

whatever the hell you're saying. And I like stumble off. We get into the theater. We sit down right away. And I'm just like, yo, like you get that vibe where you're like, no,

I can relax a little bit, you know? And like, we're waiting for the movie start. And I'm kind of like drama. I'm like, I, I,

it's like, I'm not getting, I didn't get a drink, but I'm too scared to go outside to'm not getting i didn't get a drink but i'm too scared to go outside to people and we didn't get a drink and i said to my buddy i was like can you get me a water and he's like yeah i'll get you just the water i'm like yeah because he was going anyways so he went he got a water he comes back he gives it to me it is like in this really fucking weird bottle you know i'm like okay i asked for a while i open it up and i take a sip

i have no idea what the fuck it was but it was not water it tasted weird and i'm like looking it up and the bottle looks like a vinegar bottle or something and it's like not hitting like water and i'm like trying to drink it and i'm like it's not vibing with me there's i'm like worried about and i'm trying to look at the label when it's light in the movie, but we're at a particularly dark movie. I'm never getting the chance. And I look over at Matt's syndicate, and I'm looking at him, and he's got

his long hair, and he looks at me like... And I'm like, I don't fucking know this guy, Matt. Did he just give me a bottle of vinegar? Literally. Literally. Literally. That explains the hair.

And this guy, like, what is it? A prank or like? Yo, man, you just drank a pint of vinegar. That's so badass. Literally, like, I'm tripping out. Maybe I have no idea. And I'm looking at him, and I'm like, this guy's fucked up, dude. I can't believe he would fucking do this to me. And like, I'm like, tripping.

What were you drinking? The movie ended. It was the movie theater's brand of water. It was just their brand. Totally. It was water. I was a stone fucking moron. Bro.

I thought you poisoned me. He's like, we talked about Mike. I was so scared in the movie that you gave me something fucking weird. Why would I do that? I was like, you wouldn't. Why are you recommending this experience to people?

He called me getting scared. I'm scared. Exactly. I love it. You come out of that shit like it's the same thing like going skydiving. Way less scared. I went in there and I'm like, I'm dying, man. I'm like, this is fucked. And I'm like, I don't feel comfortable.

I don't want to talk to people. I got scared once to a movie theater and i told my buddies i was like yeah you gotta babysit me because i'm getting scared before this movie and we got there and like there was like 10 13 year olds and they were like sauce boss and i'm like and i'm like tripping heart's beating so fast go to walmart or something i get scared before and i like give them like my card and she's like this isn't the right card so she's saying it to me in french i'm tripping i don't know what i love

it like complete power this is why like i assume like some like super ceo dudes maybe want to get like like lose their power sexually and get like fucked or pegged or something like that this is my version of getting pegged is it edibles it's just like fucked up i'm scared and i'm telling you what do you gotta try it out in the moment you're scared it's like it's like a roller coaster where afterward you're looking back going i'm glad i did that but in the moment you're panicking right oh coaster where afterward you're looking back going, I'm glad I did that. But in the moment, you're panicking, right? It's all your type. It's terrifying.

It's type two fun where it's not fun to live through. It's fun to recollect. Is that what they're called? Type two fun? Yeah. I've just discovered this concept. There's type one fun. Sometimes it's deep.

Sometimes it's real surface, like a roller coaster. It's fun in the moment. It's fun right now. But is it really emotionally enriching? It's type one fun. Sometimes it is type two fun is that time you got a flat tire stuck in the rain you and your girl you hated it at the moment but you look back and you're like that situation was so fucked and it's it's a fond memory even if it wasn't a fond experience now the difference is you you usually

you're born with type one fun if you have too much fun you can develop type two fun and then you have to cut back on fun. I don't know what you're talking about. It's like diabetes. Okay. And then type 3 fun is just never fun. What if you get scared and you do something that's actually scary, though? You'll be double up. You'll be scared.

What if I take 100 milligrams with zero tolerance and then I go skydiving? That, to me, I would never do that. You'll die. You'll actually just die. I don't recommend that. Part of being scared is you are doing non-scary activity. I'm going to a movie and sitting in the dark in the corner.

I couldn't even get the water bottle myself. You got to have a chaperone or something like that. You can't. Going skydiving, bro, do it. I would love to hear about it. We're talking like going skydiving bro do it that i would love to hear about it we're talking about going skydiving in denver so it's like yeah for sure take 150 milligrams and try to stay awake on the way up you're like they'll wake you up like it's your turn yeah okay we're talking i'm i was thinking i've been looking at like all the like random niche things to do in denver while you're there. Like I found this place that teaches you sword combat.

So it's like, you guys want to learn how to fight with broad swords while we're high as fuck. And the instructor is totally going to be some fake Ninja who wants to take it seriously. Center your, center your chief. That's it.

Yo, that's it. I'm coming. Now we're filming a show together. I'm coming. It's just doing filming a show together. I'm coming. It's just me doing things way too high. And we'll make it a point being like, it's not like doing a lot or how,

like we are on literally 300 milligrams. We can't even lift these swords and we are learning right now. Yeah. I found a place that does archery where they've got like these bows that have like soft tips and you shoot each other with them. It's like paintball

but with bows. I was looking at hot air ballooning. Just imagining people, grown men, running around at like 300 milligrams. Like Legolas? Yeah, just running around trying to be people, just trying to exist. Hot air ballooning

doesn't sound like fun to me. It doesn't and it's crazy expensive. It's like $250 a person. Horse ballooning doesn't sound like fun to me it doesn't and it's crazy expensive it's like 250 a person horseback riding doesn't seem like fun either have you guys ever done mushrooms yeah i had a real bad experience i'm gonna do them i'm down to do them again in colorado i'm down to do just about anything why was it a bad experience uh the people around story before but essentially um i went out in public on them oh yeah you drove the car with that yeah with your girlfriend yeah almost got arrested yeah yeah so bad yeah that is bad no you should not you should stay home do it and stay home or go in like the woods or something or something like that yeah or play with like fire or something. I did it. I played mass effect.

Like I took some mushrooms and I put on mass effect and I went to like the squad select screen to like choose like, like, like points where attributes will go. And like, I have a big TV and this like super 4k detailed alien face, this guy, Thane,

if you know who Thane is, he looks like a, he looks like a fish dude, but Thane is like just badass looking and he's huge and he's sitting there and he's like like blinking and like he's just existing and he's like he's like he just exists and I'm like this guy right here is like a real thing to me and I'm just staring at him to the point that i actually had to just like get a t-shirt made of this moment of my trip like i actually tripped to the point where i was like

this needs to be memorial but here it is this is literally me recording the screen and it was just this yeah exactly and here he is when he's moving and it's huge on the screen and i'm like staring at him i'm like bro he's blinking it's just fuck and then i'm thinking like in the fictional world this guy like he this is his species or whatever and then you start thinking the developer like thought this up someone wrote this and then another guy drew it and then another guy made it in 3d and i'm standing like in front of my tv like just staring at it i literally got a t-shirt i got a t-shirt with thane on it like two days later i was like yo this is my boy man for like 40 minutes me and this guy

connected yeah yeah but see that was like safe space staring at your tv at home alone no i did it in the danger zone yeah you went to like Friendly's or something. Yeah, I went to Walmart and passed out, and then I went to a barbecue restaurant. It was a goddamn fucking nightmare. It's one of the worst experiences of my entire life, and I've had some. But I think it's decriminalized.

Psilocybin, I think, is decriminalized in Denver or maybe Colorado on the whole. No, I didn't know that. You got to do acid now that's what we're talking about by the way um i would do i would try acid for sure um i would try just about anything i don't want to do meth because i don't like um like yeah that's a bad idea some are good i'm listening i'm not gonna put i'm sitting here i'm like yeah eat 500 milligrams it gets scared yeah don't get scared by doing meth though don't touch yeah that's a genuine

scared experience though no i i just don't touch meth. That's a genuine scared experience, though. I just don't think it would be enjoyable because I've done Adderall. I want to do busy work. I don't want to do a drug that makes me productive. I want the opposite of that. Meth means more than enough. I don't want to eat meth.

I imagine all the drugs feel good. They feel good in different ways like it's this energetic like like motivated to do stuff kind of scatterbrained kind of kind of high whereas like weed is just like relaxed and fucking people always said that uh yeah i've a friend unfortunately an old buddy of mine and he had smoked meth and i was like what's that like and he was like and i was like what's that like and he was like like i was like what's it what's it like smell like taste like and he was like you know when you get a new car the smell of a new car i was like yeah he was like that's what it

tastes like and i was like that's the scariest description to me that ensures i will never i was already never going to ever i love that smell i know that smell. I know, but do you want to drink it? No. I kind of do. I'm going to drink a little of it. It's like chemically, no. It smells very chemical to me. It smells like... I smell like new car on the inside now.

What is that smell? It's glue. Plastic? It's glue. He told me that he got that... That he would do meth and clean his house. I remember my friends would take Vyvanse or Adderall.

Where could I get Vyvanse? You could just get Adderall or Vyvanse. That's the same thing. That's literally what it is. That's it. It's a cheap imitation of meth. It's a big house. She's got a lot of cleaners. She tried grinding them up and snorting them. More. You get mad at her. Stop picking at your face

and clean the counters. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I fucking love that Harley's in my old room. I'm looking at it. That clock behind him. I fucking love that Harley's in my old room. I'm looking at it. Like that clock behind him. I spent hours shopping for a completely silent clock that wouldn't interrupt it. Like, cause I had one that ticked and I could hear it just faintly in my videos.

The picture underneath that, I'm pretty sure that's Kyle, Joe Lozon and I in Chicago on, in like one of the world's tallest buildings that, that vertically oriented one next to the television, it's like melted crayon art that I think either one of my kids made. When I was working super hard on the doorknob, there was a do not disturb button so I could sleep in.

And there's a fly swatter, I think, hanging from the doorknob. And look at this Photoshop job, by the way. And you're in those squares, by the way. And he had in those cars by the way and he had wired that tv into the wall in like a wild kind of way like like i looked in there behind that tv and the crawl space and it's it's it's pretty cool how he had like stuck that tv in the wall yeah so the tv is the room is very small so when even when a tv sticks out like that eight inches it it takes some room and the door wouldn't so anyway anyway, I embedded the TV into the wall and built like a, I don't know,

like a little indentation. And then underneath it, you blocked it out with white, but it had like a, whatever, DVD and Xbox and PlayStation. Underneath that also built into the wall. Behind that TV is the attic steps that lead up to the attic. So underneath the steps

is where I stored the Xbox and the PlayStation. You could open two doors and get access to them to do all the attic. Underneath the steps is where I stored the Xbox and the PlayStation. You could open two doors and get access to them to do all the wiring. Under the stairs? Basically, the stairwells had a trap door that you could open and then get to the PlayStation and the wiring and stuff.

It was strong enough to walk on. I did a whole thing where I built that room out so I could get work done. I love that extra effort for the TV. The bunk bed that you had above your desk. It's so reminiscent of those Chinese work factories that had

the mail to prevent suicides. He's got that outside his own work window. I didn't like it. It was a loft bed, but I didn't like having legs that went all the way to the ground. So it's in the corner of the room on two walls. It's supported. Then there's a chain that linked to the ceiling that held the like suspended joint so that you did.

It wasn't like in the way when you worked underneath it. I did that room. Right. You did. I'm sure whoever bought it is like, what the fuck is this unusable room? This is the sex room. Not very practical, though.

You get to fuck up here on these scary joints. This is the room we believe they kept a man prisoner. This is the original. Oh, my God. This is the worst. That's why I took out of it. There's a man who works 80 hours a week right there. He's so pale.

Oh, God. He's so pale. Oh, God. He looks so blown out. It's so long. I thought it was. It was this one. He looks so much happier now than that guy. You know what this looks like from this right now, from this then to you now?

You literally look like Steve Carell in The Office from season one and then like the last season. I'm looking at like, that's me earning the money, this is me spending the money. That's the difference. Steve Carell season one. I was like, if this you can talk to that you, he goes, keep it up.

Don't you get in that fucking joint, Ned. Jackie just feeds me exclusively with flat foods under the door like here's some pop tarts, some pizza I'm tired of living on non-bread couldn't never get tired of non-bread that's great

oh Harley I want to hear about your Invisalign first of all, why did you get it i never noticed your teeth being imperfect in any way um well i do have a lot of hair that covers my mouth anyways so it's like not you wouldn't you wouldn't even see it like my teeth didn't that's like what everyone says they're like we don't even see your teeth bro uh i i like just kind of i i my first thought and i'm so happy i didn't do this my first thought was uh i'm gonna get like fake teeth like i'm gonna get big ass fucking chunky white steve harvey teeth and people are like why and i'm like it's gonna be fucking hilarious i was like i promise

you my face everything will be funnier when I have big white teeth like Steve Harvey. I went to an orthodontist. He was like, hey, you're a fucking idiot, by the way. And I was like, I know, I know. I went there on 300 milligrams. I was like, big white teeth. You should talk to the fencing company

that did boogies. That did what? Yeah, that's it. The fencing company that did boogies. That did what? Yeah, that's it. The fancy one. The boogie teeth. Fucking slapped another coat of lacquer on that boy. See, you have to trick

the dentist into painting him white. I'm a bad person by association just because I know you do. That's what I wanted, though. I have fake teeth. It's okay, wanted. I wanted that, though. I have fake teeth. It's okay, Boogie. Boogie's never going to see this. They don't have YouTube in prison.

Oh, that's right. He's in legal trouble. Yeah, he's got a legal problem because of the gun incident. Oh, yeah. I still think Boogie was morally right, even if he wasn't legal. I think he was morally right, too. You get everything up to shooting and in the air though. That's why rule one, we've said before, when you're

even in those carry classes, they explicitly say, don't fire warning shots. Don't do that. That's a movie thing. I'm kind of glad he didn't shoot the guy. He might have even bigger problems. What he should have done is not open the door. He should have just been very boring. Don't

reply. The police come. That would have been the move. I would have been furious. I should have just been very boring. Don't reply. The police come. That would have been the move. I would have been furious. I would have definitely been furious. We were just talking about it before with you and the doxing. The guy showed up and he started exercising hassle doctrine.

You've got two options at that point in my opinion. Either one, you do what I think all of us would do, and you're just like, Stay inside. All right, I guess I'm going to stay inside and call the police now because it's happened again. Or you put on your tutu,

slap on some red lipstick, and you rush him. You rush him. And the system hypno worked. And you just fucking start making out with him right there. You tackle him to the ground like he's your lost fucking love. Yeah's the that's the only way to beat stuff like that you have to agree and amplify you walk out in a gimp suit with your penis hanging out and you say come on do you fuck his ass when do you stop how no you're the you're grinding your

you're grinding your ass that's the idea of me doing that is so ugly in my heart that's so you in my heart. That's so ugly. You're on top of him, and you look like when a dog's scratching its asshole in a rug. Oh, my God. Think about me doing that to Boogie. Just think about that. Me and Boogie rolling around on the grass, both in gym suits. God, I love that.

With big fake teeth. As if I don't think about that all the time. Yes. I want you in, like, assless, those pajamas that have the little button- thing in the back like a pajama onesie those are so like western like yeah like an old man with like the stove and the fire burning yeah yeah for some reason he needs to show urges robert duvall would wear in a western i genuinely want to know why harley got invisalign yeah so um i got – I had this thing. It's so funny.

I used to call it ghost teeth. Like my teeth were like – let me make me bigger. My teeth were like – Zach, can you full screen Harley? I could do it. I could do it also. I could make me bigger for everyone. Hey, man, what's up, guys?

Welcome to PKA. So they were like – this is it, by the way, in there. I wish it was. You see these nubs on the teeth? Oh, yeah. You can see it there. Sure, sure. It hooks onto that.

You have to keep them on 22 hours a day. You can't really see my teeth now. They were like, I thought that they were very um what's the word i called them ghost teeth because they were like almost translucent they were almost translucent like they were like like it wasn't like yeah they were like thinning or they were like gray looking like blue like i called them ghost teeth because they just looked like a haunted ghost's mouth. And I went to the guy and I was like, yeah, I got ghost teeth. And he was like, yeah, I see what you mean. But I was like, I want to, like I was looking into that,

getting like veneers or something. I just wanted to just have a better mouth. My mouth here is like square. It's like smaller here, more narrow on the bottom. And if you see my overbite, you can't see because I'm getting an extra little bit of piece here because my Invisalign is in, so it's actually making it have more space. My overbite, you see that? Oh, yeah, you do have a bit of an overbite.

Yeah, it's like a 90% functional overbite. Whatever that yeah yeah you have a bit of an overbite yeah it's like a 90 functional overbite whatever nothing important though not worth like rushing to change or anything but if you just want to it was something that i thought about doing and i thought i have all these fillings uh-huh damn a lot of cab yeah i used to be scared of the dentist like i literally like i went to go see a dentist specialist because i didn't like the dentist. And he was like, yeah, he's like grabbed my arms. And he's like, put your arms here. Don't move them while I work.

And like I was like didn't like the drill and like it nicked me. And like I started to bleed and I like spat the blood on him and kicked him. I was like eight years old, but like 5'10". I'll beat the shit out of my dentist right now. And so I just was like I just was bad with my teeth. And I got all these cavities. I was like, you know what? I should just get like a white mouth. It'll be like Steve Harvey.

It'll be hilarious. And he was like, no, he's like, he's like, even if you did do that, he's like, yeah, you can get on a plane and go to Turkey and they'll fuck your mouth up and put the veneers. And he's like, but what you want, like if you got like braces then did it it would be infinitely better because like your foundation you don't want to like get veneers on how your mouth is set up now and he's like in the job that they're going to do he's like you're going to have to go and see them again in like 15 years at least or something like that i mean that's not uncommon for veneers like you have to get those touched up every 10 50 yeah he yeah he exactly so and he

was like it'll be expensive and you'll it's just thing he's like get braces because you i recommend you do that anyways and then he's like and then you could see from there um so i looked and i uh i um because of like i just do stuff on camera like uh they'll either give you braces or Invisalign. You pay the same price, but like you just, if you are, you don't just like get the kind of like, like they, they will give you Invisalign instead for the same price of the braces. Um, and, uh, yeah, so I did that. I've been doing it for three months. Uh, I, I by default eat less now cause I have to take them out and brush your teeth every time you keep them in for 22 hours.

But I'm weird. I like I get like I'll get like higher or something and like feel them in my mouth and be like, I'm so happy that every single tooth is being squeezed so hard right now. It's very hard to explain. But like, I like some shit like that in my life sometimes. Like when I used to get a mosquito bite, I would like take my fingernail and push it hard on my mosquito bite. Like, oh, oh. Or like if I had a scab, I'd push my thumb on it. Like that hurts.

It's like when you have a sore tooth. Like when you have a sore tooth as a kid and you're like, I wonder if it still hurts. Ah! Yeah. Exactly like that. Except I'm an adult. But yeah. When I did Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, I had a mouth guard that

you'd get it, like you'd put it in boiling water and then it would mold to your teeth. I felt good with it on. Anytime a thing got bumped, it got distributed across your whole upper jaw and it was better. With the braces, I have a similar type thing. I'm like, if I got into a motorcycle accident

right now, this would help a little. Wouldn't be that tooth-on-tooth bite or smack and it'd be distributed the load. It feels good to have a little bit of tooth protection in all the time. When I was going to get my teeth fixed, this was years ago now, they told me I would have to go traditional braces because Invisalign wouldn't be enough to fix what my problem was because I didn't have a cross bite or an overbite. It was a direct on top of one another bite, which is apparently like the worst thing for your teeth's aging and so they were like yeah you can either uh get traditional braces which will be a little cheaper and you'll have them on for about two years and i was like what's the other option what's the other option because it's like and i even told him i'm like all all my jobs have to do with talking and i just i didn't tell him about the podcast and i'm like i

don't know if i can handle that level of bullying like just being mocked ruthlessly as an adult with bray oh that would have been brutal i even with this in my mouth sometimes i'll say something and it'll be like uh like a like a fart noise and that in the middle of a sentence is just right away you stop talking like yeah i know i know i'm you know like i hate to keep picking on boogie but but no, I don't. I noticed when he came back after he got his teeth done that he had a speech impediment now. And it's like...

He needed to get him shaved down a bit more. No, he did. You didn't notice? I think I forgot as you were saying it. He was like, hey guys, it's nice to be back on PKA. I always enjoy doing this. Had he had them for a while? Fuck a path. They're big.

Here's the thing. When I wear my braces, sometimes I do a little thing. I might get an S wrong. It's hard to describe, but there's something capped on your rear teeth. And your tongue, which normally fits nicely between your two teeth is now smushed. So it just gets interfered with as you go to use it every once in a while. And part of the problem is it's different every week, every week you have a slightly different set of teeth.

So you don't just adjust to it like you would maybe. Fair enough. Yeah. Here's just way, way, way, way too fucking big. I mean,

I got mine. I, uh, cause mine aren't veneers. There's like epoxy, like some sort of dental epoxy that just built my teeth. And I went home. I have that. Yeah, I went home that that evening and talked to my I guess my now wife and was like, oh, is this is this OK? And she was like, it looks good. Don't even notice.

And I walk in the bathroom and i'm like liar and then like i i literally the next day drove to the dentist and was like i don't have an appointment i was just here dropped a lot of money for these teeth i need you to shave these down like please i have i have my show tonight and so they went he went there and like a little dremel and he like cut off like half a centimeter of all the teeth and made it look normal and i bet it was a lot i'm being hyperbolic i'm sure it feels like that in your mouth it feels like three feet of difference in your mouth with your tongue like and then you look at it and it's like an infinitesimally small amount removed but basically that's what boogie needs to do go back be like i want you to shape these a little more

take off because what i what i knew is like the back part of it they left that like super chunky almost where like my tongue wasn't feeling like it was fitting in my mouth correctly and i'm like i want you to like thin out the back of my upper teeth so that it feels normal and i can speak clearly and they did and he did how dare they not come out of the gate doing that that's a kind of fucked up there's laziness and like yeah that is for sure like i don't think it was laziness. Yeah, that is, for sure. I don't like that. Laziness or just a craftsman shit? I think basically he was like, that's good enough.

The way dental offices make their money, it's like a mechanic. The amount of turn you get in that chair or that bay is how much money you make that day. Once they're good enough, it's like, all right, boom, out of here. I think he's ready if he asks like, if he asks, sure. If he doesn't ask, fuck it.

Dude, my dentist is a huge deposit. I know I've talked about this before, this emotion bank account. I chipped my tooth. I bit a fork because I'm stupid, and I chipped my tooth, and it was one of the front. It was both of the front two, one a tiny bit, one a little more. And while it was small, dude, if you have messed up front top

teeth, nothing small. And I was like, I have a show. It was either like tonight or tomorrow. I need you, bro. And he does like Miss America's teeth and stuff, but he's very good. And he's like, yep, I get it. Come on in. And he made room for

me and they look perfect. You couldn't tell it yep, I get it. Come on in. And he made room for me, and they looked perfect. You couldn't tell it happened, and I'm happy. But the fact that he took care of it on the spot instead of rescheduling me for two weeks, that made a big deal. I met, when I was in Arkansas, I met Woody, actually. I hit him up. I was like, oh, I'm in Arkansas. We should just meet in person because, I don't know, we're on YouTube.

I don't fucking know. And he was like, yeah, for sure. And he was like, yeah, in Arkansas. We should just meet in person because we're on YouTube. I don't fucking know. Yeah. And he was like, yeah, for sure. And he was like, yeah, we'll grab something to eat. And I'm like, sick. I'm like, I'm fucking going to eat with fucking Woody in Arkansas. And this was like pre like the operations he got and stuff. So I'm like, we're going to fuck it up.

You know, like big boy shit. We're both over 300 pounds.'s get it you know and then uh like he like yeah he's like here's the address i'm like cool i'm like i pull up and it's a sushi place and i'm just like i do not want to eat sushi in arkansas like it's not the thing like i didn't want like i thought this is boogie you're talking about yeah boogie yeah we met I think you said Woody. Kyle, muted. Did you think you had forgotten the time you had sushi in Harlem? No, I was going along with it this whole time.

I was like, I don't know where this bitch going. I might have said Woody. I don't know. Yeah, when I met Boogie. You know, I was like. No, man, I'll grab sushi with you in Arkansas. I was like, whatever this story is, I'm co-signing it. I don't care.

You're like, it is true. We did. It's like my murder alibi or something i'm like i need you bro just yeah you're like this is before the surgery we're both over 300 i'm like all right so you'd be like i was the story i was so lost i was like i was like what he's never been 300 pounds and i'm like what my bad did woody have that i don't know about no i met woody i met woody uh when did we meet what was the first time first time but i think it was in vermont uh was it vermont epic shoot and uh i was with kyle and yeah okay was that when you thought i hated you what's it for sure you did i was gone 100 we all knew it you hated all of us.

Actually, the only thing that made me change my mind about that was I happened to catch like an old Freddie Wong episode of this show that I had never seen before. And I left it on. And you were like, it was like the episode that like no one got the satire of it. It was the first time where we pushed how far can we satire with epic mealtime and we did the drunken mess and uh we got a lot of hate on that episode because it was like i was like full satire 100 like not it was not doctored at all after and it did like did not hit the mark on youtube and you and freddie were like yeah and the way you were talking about it i was like oh shit maybe what he did like us back then.

Well, I'm like, well, then he's just, you know what? Fuck him. He's weird, bro. I was acting like that. No, the vibe that I had around you, like you were doing a shoot. You had to, you were like buying groceries and you had like a lot of stuff to do and your camera work. Like I forget it was doing the camera work,

but he knew what he was doing. And I was trying to like be supportive and stay out of the way at the same time. And I took what you were doing very seriously because it's a big business, you know, whether- Yeah, but I went and filmed with Kyle and we practically had sex with girls on his kitchen floor while filming.

So I feel like I was very respectful around. At the same time, there's levels to it, right? Like it is this like silly thing at the heart of it but but then then again it's like there's a lot of money at stake here and like like this is this week's like paycheck and everything and this is like the continuation of like the the thing you know you can't just go a week without a video really and keep things keep the ball rolling so we're like those i went through like old laptops the other day because i'm like i'm like i'm gonna need to make sure i've got a good laptop for it for when i go on this trip to colorado in

three months uh i was trying to figure out if i need to buy one and then i was gonna start shopping because it was prime day or if um you know one of my older laptops i haven't used in a bit is is gonna work because all i needed to do was do this yeah but anyway um i was going through those hard drives and i found all of the pictures from, and I found all of the pictures from that night. I found all of the pictures from that night where we filmed that shit at my house with those crazy bitches. There's like a chick wearing a Russian flag and nothing else. Oh, my God.

I have never gotten this answer. People know during that night there was a party going on, and it was clear the guys and girls were all uh starting to hang out and stuff so i excused myself and went to the bedroom was not appropriate place for me to be with those girls and also i'm like 40 something in marriage i'm a wet blanket so that you know that it's my impression that the guys don't want me like what watching them exactly right you know this so so i got out of the way I heard a girl Make obvious orgasm

Noises coming from that main room And I No one has ever seemed to recollect That incident That had to be maybe with Kyle Because I definitely gave nobody any pleasure I didn't know Was it like faking

Was it like a Harryry met sally type thing happening yeah also glasses was doing a bit um good impressions yeah i mean um the only sex i had was with the girl that i brought that night um but but um we um i think after you left we went and did some sort of a bikini photo shoot for her Instagram or something in the snow where she's wearing like nothing but a bikini and snow boots. And then we all went upstairs. And I think I think muscles glasses may have vomited on a girl. So that kind of like shut down their their sexy time. Yeah.

And then Harley's other lady friend, the blonde lady and i were in a bedroom and she she crushed some pills up on the nightstand and offered them to me and that really turned me off who went in home so and like that's how you get your wife to clean the house by the way the adderall that way like i like weed and and she's just like crushing these fucking white pills up on the uh she went to the stranger she went to the neighbors and stuff like knocking on their door being like we sent them to the neighbor's house to knock on the door to look for weed because like that's the way you get weed right like if me or you go hey y'all guys got weed like get the fuck out of here we don't know you but it's like two hot chicks they're like 20 22 years

old or whatever show up like hey you guys got any weed if there was weed there they would have gotten it yeah they would tempt them with the possibility of pussy and then quickly leave with the weed maybe if we went with us at the time the year that it was they maybe would have been like oh my god it's bacon and guns from youtube maybe there's a chance there's a chance that was our people recognize bacon and guns it was our demographic in china though you're right you're right you're right yeah it's true but i'd be like yo this is like i'd be like this is a plan she's gonna there's gonna be like eight guys that come in here and jump us if we let this person in yeah like it's like the middle of nowhere snowy road and there's like just like a girl there i'm like this looks like a trap

they're setting a trap right now those girls do you been with those girls? Do you keep in touch with them? Yeah, they're... Well, one of them I do. She's a good friend of mine. She was on Bachelor Canada actually. Is she the blonde one? Yeah, she went on Bachelor Canada and she made it pretty far. She's still a friend. She moved, but we still keep in touch a little here and there.

I knew her from back in the day. Oh, she fixed that field problem she had. Jesus Christ I was so weirded out by that and turned off at the same time when she looks back at me and there's like pill crumbs coming out of her nose Single Woody would have saddled that shit up

I'd have sucked those crumbs right out of her nose I was just like Just lick under her nose and get going There are pill crumbs coming out of your nostril I was just like I just really want some dope. Why is it so hard to find weed in Vermont?

Just before, it reminded me of last week you were talking about the Church of Kyle and when you were going on it, you were like, yeah, single man status and then I think Jericho brought up he was like yeah there's web there's ad billboards uh for like like sugar baby sites yeah and you guys were like yeah damn

and i was listening and i was like oh i need to be there for that segment which is why i brought it up like i have experience i've had a profile on that website like i went i went there cool so like my ex-girlfriend when we were like like breaking up we were just very friendly she was like oh yeah like check out this site you should like look at it you know and like i went on the site and uh like she like made a profile for me you know and like we like looked at it and like she had a profile and then like never used it and then like five days later i like went back on and like we saw each other on online on the site and like it was like fresh so that got mad at each other like oh you're on the site hey

what are you looking for something like yeah i was just trying to see if you were on it but like yeah what the fuck? And like, we got into a fight. And like, I stopped using it, but I kept the profile. And I did hop on there a whole bunch after the fact. And never, ever met someone or paid someone, but it was really fascinating to me how many people that I knew were on the site. Like it was very, very frequent that I would like see a girl that maybe I matched with on Tinder would also be there or match with her on a dating site. And then I'd go and like,

look at the age range and I'd see her there. And'd be like oh it's like looking for dating dating's off like like it's kind of like i remember this time and it's not quite the same you guys said it was like uh kind of like being escorts it's not quite the same some people aren't having sex on it whatever it could be to some people they could be using it like that um escorts get kicked off the site but regardless anyways um i just always, I went on and I would like see people and remind me of this time when I was in Vegas and I was like at this hotel that I was staying at and I walked out and there was a girl there and she was like, like, Hey, I'll suck your dick for, you know, 300 bucks. And I was like, nah, I'm good. And then I was walking

in like an hour and a half later, i was at the bellagio and that same girl was at the bellagio and she was like i'll suck your dick for 600 bucks and i was like what i just saw you said 300 bucks and she was like we're at the bellagio now okay and then i thought about like the girls that like you'd see can we go to the hard rock real quick yeah let's pop into how about you give me a hand job at red lobster i see them on tinder and then i go over and i see like them on seeking uh or what yeah that's probably the site that was that you guys saw the the billboard and i go that's it and they'd be there too and i'd be like well isn't this interesting if i are if i'm to message you on on tinder shit's free tonight but if i message you here maybe it's just like

pay you to accompany me to dinner or some shit you know what i mean but it's like ultimately the same service with a different set of rules right off the bat and it was fascinating that like almost every single person that i saw like I can't, I like literally eight out of 10 people on Tinder were also on those websites. But is she more inclined to match with you on the sugar babies one? Right. Maybe she sees the same guy in both places and like Tinder. Fuck no. Oh, but this guy would be great.

Yeah, but you don't, it'd be bold to show your whole face uh as it is it would be bold to like people don't necessarily show everything but like i'd go and see like a tinder picture and then you would see that exact same picture like ass cropped only or something like that or like you know like uh a particular picture that wasn't really demonstrating which person it was but you're right yeah listen you miss your shot on tinder you can go slide in on the other one and be like i have money for this but it was like you guys were talking about it and i was like you know what i i should i wish i was there because i want to say how common it actually is um and how common it was to just like like literally like people even like in my hometown i like had searched my

hometown and like looked at people my age and i was like wow i went to school with all these people yeah now they're out here you know i'm just gonna pay like like like i i feel like either we're on a date or it's a business transaction but muddling the two together seems odd to me it's like oh yeah we're on a date that i'm paying for. Well, here's the date with extra steps. Yeah. You're a young guy. Like, it's not like you're a young, good looking guy. It's not hard for you.

You know what I mean? Like I didn't have any purpose on the site as well. Like, but if you are, let's say me and you 20 years older than we are now, and you want to be with a 25 year old, you could maybe not come across one in particular, but right here you could be like, yo, I have money and I will buy you things. That makes more sense.

Consider me as an option amongst all the young hottie boys you're matching with on Tinder. You know what I mean? Yeah, but I think still as a 55-year-old man that I'm just like rather like just i get an actual prostitute right yeah well i hope i'm just married with kids at that point are you still going to be church of kyle in 20 years from now i don't know man probably probably like like i just think taylor's made the biggest mistake of his life and it's

gonna i mean i think five years from now he looks back and he's just like, What's that? What's that? I heard some shit talk. We were talking about how I heard this song that reminded me of you the other day. It's called something about I put the right No, I've heard that country song.

My friend with a bigger dick than me. Yeah. I put the ring my friend with a bigger dick than me. For the right, I put the ring on the right left hand this time, something like that. It's just a beautiful love song about, about marriage. And it just reminded me of you and how happy you're going to be.

And, and I got, I got a tear in my eye thinking about how my friend is finally found his soulmate and how they're going to be happy together. And it meant a lot to me. Well, God hard it's hard to believe it but i did get married if we want to talk about that have you quoted borat at all yet no let's talk about borat no i mean like like seriously before you were like my wife and i I was like, no, yeah. Yeah. Not having done that yet.

She has never done all the time. She'll love it. St. Louis. I'm dying to hear about Taylor's wedding. I'm dying to hear that. Tell us, what do you want to say? Basically, everything went super well. The wedding itself, like we like the actual ceremony.

We tried to, like, take all the things we didn't like about other people's weddings which was namely like having to go and getting rid of them into yours oh okay no again combined like my dad's side of the family's catholic and if you've ever gone to a catholic wedding it takes fucking forever there's so many readings there's so many you're kneeling you're standing you're kneeling you're standing and we were were doing it outside in June and it's more humid in St. Louis than people might guess. And so we were like, all right, it's got to, she like gave me a couple of the ceremonies to read through. And they all had like the amount of time each one takes. It's like 15 minutes, 14 minutes, 14 minutes, 13 minutes, 12 minutes. I grabbed the 12 minute

one. It was like that because I was dreading getting all doused in sweat. And so for the ceremony itself, we didn't invite anybody at all other than immediate family, like no cousins, like cousins would ask. And it's like, no, we're not opening the floodgates. It's just immediate family.

So like literally my brothers, my dad, my dad's wife, and then my grandparents and my, my grandpa, my dad's eyes dead. So, but my grandma isn't.

So she was there. And then my, my, my wife's immediate family knocked it out in like 12 minutes and even before like when we proposed like later that night or when i proposed later that night i got uh we both got drunk and we just were talking around like who do we want to officiate our ceremony and i have this very funny friend of mine who's one of my best friends and i was like that'd be a lark if we just had him do it and had him get had him become a minister and so like i just drunk texted him that night it was like want to officiate our wedding

and he was like hell yeah dude and so we just had him do it he became a minister and everything uh and we she my wife she wanted a little bit of religious stuff in there and i'm like i like that you know throw god in there makes it seem more serious like read something from read something from corinthians but like as it was going yeah first corinthians and and the such and love your wife is the lord loves the church and such a boilerplate and like as it's going it's such a small group of people there's no reason to have a microphone at all and we're outdoors and this fucking horrible dj was like in the back like trying to get a mic to work for my buddy who was doing the officiating and even in the beginning like i was like hey matt can you just talk loud enough he's like yeah this is easy as shit and then as he was saying that the mic

turned on i'm like all right we'll give it a go i guess so this idiot who just spent all this time setting it up we get to like right before first of all by the time like my brothers and everybody's sitting down i'm already dripping sweat i'm so, it's 94 degrees outside. 94 degrees. I'm a sweater. How much prosciutto had you had for breakfast? I don't see why that's either here nor there, but a decent amount. There was definitely lunch meat to be had.

And so like, as we're about to do the vows and stuff that like, like middle of like, like Wednesday afternoon kind of gathering in high school where like the mic goes like that happens right before and then like he's like fixing it and like me and the officiant like my buddy are just like just turn it off just turn it on the guy just turn it off and then we did the rest normally went off really well uh it was i i thought the sweating was going to occur during the ceremony it was actually the hour and a half of photos outside afterward.

But I had a high IQ maneuver that morning. On the morning of my wedding, I went to Kohl's and bought two more shirts, backup shirts for when I sweated through. I only needed one, surprisingly. But we finished that and we used the same venue for our ceremony as we did for the reception. So that was our thing, just immediate family at the ceremony and then have our friends and everything come for the reception. So like that was our thing is like just, just immediate family at the ceremony and then have our friends and everything come for the reception.

That was a ton of fun. The only thing I was like adamant about was like, I don't want a bunch of pomp and circumstance. I don't want speeches really. We'll do the first dance stuff. Cause that's nice and quick. And I enjoyed that, but I don't want speeches.

I don't want toasts. I just want like people to get their food and then sit down and eat. And then we do our little first dance and everybody socializes plays games outside talks catches up and it ended up being exactly that it was fucking perfect it was great um and the the dj was acting like a little weird throughout the night like kind of jumpy and stuff and i didn't see this it was after i had gone outside to do like like what he knows he's married you end up doing like the rounds where it's like i can't wait to like talk to my friends and hang out like no bitch you're talking to every single person that's here yeah and so you do that and then i was talking

to a buddy later in the evening and he was like hey did you you noticed uh do you notice anything about your dj and i'm like yeah he like disappeared a few times he's like yeah i walked in the bathroom and he was standing next to the counter and he just as soon as he heard me open it he went hey hey what's up and apparently he kept dipping off into the fucking bathroom and doing coke and that's not the vibe that's not the vibe of the wedding that's not the the environment it's not the environment we're trying well he's trying to make that the vibe but that's not the environment we Yes, it was. It's not the environment. Well, he's trying to make that the vibe, but that's not the environment we were trying to cultivate. It was him doing fucking cocaine in the bathroom.

And he was all right, I suppose. All that went fine. Like the reception, everything, not that much else to say. It was great. We had a wonderful time. And then the honeymoon, we went to, we had one day off after the wedding and then we headed to Jamaica for a week, which was a blast

and the whole time i was like all right i went to jamaica like eight nine years ago when my dad got remarried and it was super easy to get weed i hope it's that easy this time like didn't know what to expect and i like the the porter the guy that like carries your bags like we get to the hotel or the resort rather and he starts moving it all and he's he starts telling me he's like you open up that pamphlet there you can get yourself a free cigar down at the lounge and i was like a free cigar down at the lounge you know uh you know joseph i don't smoke cigars but i uh i smoke ganja can you help me with some ganja and this was four minutes after we got there he's like yeah man you just come up here you know and i'm, how much is it? And he's like, you know, 50, 60, $70. And I'm like, which one though?

I can't do Jamaican. I can't, I'm doing my best. It's hard one for me for some reason. But anyway, I tell him and I'm like, like, how much is it? Like, do you guys do grams? Like what, what is the amount? And he's like, I'm going to level with you, man. Just give me like 50, 60, 70.

I bring it back to you. And I was like, I'm going to level with you, man. Just give me 50, 60, 70. I'll bring it back to you. I was like, all right. I gave him 70 bucks. He leaves. Every time that happens, I'm like, have I been taken for a fool? Then no. Immediately, he comes back. It was a slight bit less than a quarter. Slight bit less than a quarter. Not too bad. It was in a fake pharmacy pack. They had clearly put it into a quarter. So not too bad. And but it was in like a fake pharmacy pack. Like they had clearly put it into a pharmacy pack and like resealed it.

And like I don't know how they did it, but they did that. And it was like so clearly not pharmaceutical grade weed. There were seeds in it. But oh, dear. But and then like going around the resort, they're selling pieces. They're selling chillums and all like little stores. So I just get one of those. And so the whole the whole week, i'm just grinding that up and smoking and people approach apparently spreads like wildfire around there like like hey this guy you know he'll buy it he'll he'll

buy it so like approach him and so i was like like i felt like a princess like all week like i have members of the resort being like hey you want some hash oil man and well you know i got easier you're actually you're actually a mark by the way oh i'm like i think i think you bought like five dollars or ten dollars worth of weed for 70 and they're like yo this is the guy and they're like bring it they're like i got shit too man get it this is 48 bucks right here 48 bucks i think that's what they were uh maybe i mean maybe like maybe like $10 there, but I know what weed amounts are. It sounds like a win-win. It was about a little less than a quarter for about 70 bucks.

Listen, I would be going being like, yo, I don't want trouble with anyone. I don't want to end up on anyone's bad list. Here's a couple bucks for you and your buddies. Just let's get it over here. Oh, no. The guy, I gave him the 70 bucks. And when he came back like i threw him a 20 just for like maybe like 25 bucks just for going to grab it oh he's telling

everyone yeah he's telling everyone like this guy gave me a great tip and i don't give a fuck it's my honeymoon i got i got some cash to burn and so like maybe three days later this like random woman who works there walks up and she's like you know you want anything that's you know not smokable and i was like you got edibles like gummies or anything and she's like you know you want anything that's you know not smokable and i was like you got edibles like gummies or anything and she's like let me see and so like nothing happens the rest of the day i assume she forgot seven or no it was like eight in the morning the next day i'm sitting drinking coffee on the balcony looking at the ocean like reading my stormlight archive book and i just hear this jamaican lady who's like looking up like hey and i was like hey

and i was like hello like can i help you i forgot who it was because i was probably you know drinking the evening before and she was like i got what you need and i was like okay and i'm like what did i ask her for and so i came down there and she like has this this big container of gummy bears like not gummy bears like gummy cubes like clearly homemade gummy cubes and like i smell it to make sure it even smells like kush i'm like okay this smells like real edibles and she's like you know 30 bucks and i'm like all right whatever gave her 30 bucks and i left it in our little beach bag and this little pouch all of the gummies melted into a jelly and now there's no way to know what how much you're having and so like the

next morning the next morning we were getting ready to go to breakfast or out to the beach and i wanted to eat some edibles uh i guess this is right after this or no the next morning after it melted and i was like scooping it out and like i was like eating it like an army ration with a spoon and i was just trying to eyeball like, oh, it tastes like just weed. Oh, this is terrible. There's no flavor. And I just ate like half the bag. And maybe 30 minutes later, I'm like, damn it.

This is probably nothing. And then I genuinely got pretty fucked, way higher than I thought I was going to, eating those edibles. And so that was a win. That's how every edible story goes. Yeah. I thought it was going to be a week. Every edible story goes. Yeah. I thought it was going to be a week of a lot more drinking. But once the pot started flowing, it was like, you know, this is kind of nice. I like that better, actually.

And they only have Red Stripe there. And Red Stripe tastes like shit. That's the beer. It tastes like shit. Yeah. And I had a mixed drink. I had one mixed drink the whole time on the first day. The table next to us, this nice couple, were like, try a Bob Marley. And I'm like, okay. And I and even when I was and I had a mixed drink, I had one mixed drink the whole time on the first day, like this table next to us, this nice couple were like, try a Bob Marley.

And I'm like, OK, and I got one of those. And I'm like, there's like three shots of liquor, some heavy handed Jamaican guys trying to get me fucked up to get tips. And so I was like, this is risky. This is going to ruin my week. And so I just was drinking Red Stripe the whole time. But it was so fucking hot that after every like 11 ounce Red Stripe, you'd have to drink 20 ounces of water and so getting drunk was an absolute chore there was there were so many evenings a bottle of rum dude there we did get a bottle of rum my my wife was like i ordered to room service because obviously unlimited room service and they bring in they restock your bar and she's like i ordered a bottle of vodka and a bottle of rum and they don't tell you prices she thought she was getting little airplane bottles to like put in the drinks she bought a liter of rum and a liter of vodka that's we did we barely touched it because like how much were they i have no idea yet probably probably somewhere between 300 yeah we didn't open the rum, and so she brought it home.

She had one vodka drink, and that was it. But yeah, mostly it was like getting stoned, really, really drilling the poor late-night room service people. Like, I need another pizza with Jamaican jerk chicken on it. Like, I need a whole Jamaican jerk meal. And I remember once them being like yeah and this is uh room a34 and i was like yeah and they're like did you just order a jerk chicken up about 40 minutes ago and i was like i was like i don't see why that matters it's like i ate so much jerk chicken i was i was eating all sorts of shit. Turns out Jamaicans, they put pumpkin in everything.

Very odd. You wouldn't expect that. But yeah, we had a blast. It was stoned as shit. We got a nice massage, went on some off resort treks to a waterfall area, which was nice. Except the waterfall thing was kind of fucking bullshit. I thought it was going to be like it was a really cool tiered waterfall that was probably looking up at like 600 yards long and like you started at the bottom and like through the water you trudged up it something they

wouldn't allow in the u.s because people would slip and crack their head and i was like imagining like from the pictures i'm like this is gonna be so cool like i'll be able to like be on my own like going up and exploring little nooks and crannies no the guy's like all right grab the hand of the person behind you like boy girl and so like bless her heart she was so nice but this morbidly obese woman was behind me and so so much of my my fatty a huge fatty and normally you know whatever i well babe i don't care except that it's my people make me sick you know fat people in that context make me sick because i was having to take all my effort to pull her up onto these ledges like she's she's half a second from a broken ankle at any

given point and this uh this fucking jamaican tour guide could not give less of a fuck he's walking around like clearly on something keeps just yelling like round here they called me bigfoot and i'm like i know bigfoot can you can grab, he was hitting on her when he was saying that? No, he was just, he was, no, no, he was announcing it. Just he's, he's, I thought he saw that fatty and he was like, yeah, they call me big foot. No, he kept walking over and being like, good job, man. Good job. He kept calling me like, he kept going, good job boss, keeping everyone safe. You're ruining my experience right now by making me have to leave. Were you high?

Yeah, I was really, really high. That's great. I love that. I feel like you're missing out. This is just pool day, Taylor. This is your specialty. It's pool day. Okay, it was pool day, but it was like I wanted it to be like free climb,

like walking around day. But no, that was not in the cards. It was like at any time I would get like a little bit ahead. You bent over rows. Yeah, some really intense bad form rose as you're standing on i have a question was there any dead dogs when you were there on the street i didn't see it but it's funny you say that my my wife like on the way to the resort on the bus she's like oh my god do you see that a dead dog so she saw i went to jamaica

once and i was not prepared to see like i saw like eight dead dogs in the two days i was there oh like on the street and i wasn't ready for that i didn't know that was part of it and yeah i mean i know people that have been there like yeah i saw the dog where people didn't and i just yeah i guess you did dude it was depressing it was depressing as shit driving because you know jama, like outside resorts, it's a third world country. And so like it's brutal driving. Like I was going to say 80 percent of the buildings are unfinished. That's actually really generous. I'd say like 90, 90 plus percent of the buildings like you're driving by.

And it's like concrete with rebar still sticking out of the top. And there's so much unfinished that it's like, what's what is going on? Like what? Taylor, you're looking at it through the wrong lens. That rebar is a testament to their ambition. Someday they're going to have a two story building. I see buildings without rebar. I'm like that guy, he doesn't dream. He's giving up the future. Yeah, dude. I saw multiple restaurants where like, they're clearly not worried about copyright law. I saw Jamaican TGI Fridays.

But it was just a shack that I painted that on. It just said like green paint Jamaican TGI Fridays. Smart and cool. I went to a synagogue when i was in jamaica really yeah there was like one or two there or something but or maybe just the one i went with like my mom and we were like yeah cool jewish shit be here cool man are there jamaican jews yeah probably jamaicans there has to be there must be some well there's like there's like a a line that is similar from judaism and rastafarian is something like that there is there is a uh some commonality apparently or something like that like some shit but i don't know rastafarianism seems pretty tight

like you could tell which jamaican guys on the side of the road were Rasta men. And cause they had the big fucking hat thing on and they looked really dirty and high. I bought a stick when I was there. I still have it. Really? It's like a walking stick, like a carved walking stick. It's like in my mom's house,

like my old bedroom was just there, like leaned up on my bed. Cause for like, I was just a thing I like swing and poke with and shit. Dude. Like for all like the scammers, like the, the, bed because for like i was just a thing i like swing and poke with and shit dude like i was right for all like the scammers like the the because like this oh yeah i went back in the place yeah they do that thing where they're like this one guy was like carving little things like these little like statues pieces of shit well it actually looks kind of cool and he was like no man you know you

take this right here and i'm like i'm not that. Then you're going to give me a second one that costs money. And then he was like, well, what happened to me was I got, I got, I went and I saw like, there was like a pipe there. And I was like, oh, like I'll get, I'll get a pipe. There's a cool pipe. And I was like, can I get this pipe? No, he, he had one. He was like, here, he's like five bucks, five bucks.

And I was like, no, that one there. And he was like, nah's like five bucks five bucks and i was like no that one there and he was like nah that one's 20 and it was like way better but it still looked like it was five bucks maybe he's like no that one's 20 and i was okay 10 bucks 10 bucks and he was like 10 bucks uh okay and i'm like cool and then he goes and he puts it in the bag and just because i was like accelerate away i took the bag as i'm giving the money and i pull it out and it's the five dollar one and i was like this is the five dollar one he's like okay he's like you take two and i'm like cracking up it's funny so i just left with the two pipes dude they scam the shit out of you and like in your head you're like dude some guy tries to scam me like i'm a rube i'm

gonna not be involved and then like they they do it and you're like overcome by like almost like oh god your life is rough man like that's why i said it to you when i was like you were a mark because i've been to jamaica i've been a mark oh like the two pipes that i didn't want instead of the one pipe i did want you know oh yeah the weed thing they're they're following me around all but they were not following just me around they're following everyone everyone was high like the entire resort i actually like that i like that a lot not that i have a honeymoon planned or anything or a marriage plan but i like going to jamaica and getting fucking high as hell they have a honeymoon and i like that better than drinking or anything like i agree they have they had like a little smoking area for cigarettes.

And I watched this fat fucking boomer guy. Big belly. He was fat? He was fat. Big fat boomer. Looks like a Rush Limbaugh listener. I was walking him. Walk over to the smoking area.

Rush Limbaugh listener. He's probably going to roast some like cigarette and then he pulls out just an enormous joint and like by himself this like boomer like the like the twitter boomer with the reflective sunglasses just stands there and smokes it all by himself it was a cool respect for boomers for that i liked it but yeah it was it was a lot of overeating and that was tremendous so yeah i had a great time that's great i love the late night pizza ordering room service that's a great move once like you're in a hotel on vacation room service like for me like i'm about it every single decision i'm like we could find something that might be quite a bit better or someone could bring us something and i'm down with them bringing

something oh for sure like yeah and part of it was the fun of room service. Neat. I never order room service. When we were in Cherokee a few months back, I had the most expensive breakfast I may have ever had. I think that bowl of oatmeal was $12. It was just a bowl of oatmeal. It was not fancy oatmeal.

They put a fruit on it or something? Give you a couple blueberries? They didn't give you any of that? No, it was not fancy oatmeal. They put a fruit on it or something? Give you a couple blueberries? They didn't give you any of that? No, it was just oatmeal. I ordered a full breakfast. It was oatmeal and two scrambled eggs and some bacon. Even the toast, I think, was $6

for two slices of toast. I'm pretty sure I had a $45 breakfast and it did not live up to the $ 45 price there's like nothing on a breakfast menu that should even approach 45 no breakfast is the cheapest meal of the day unless you're having like steak i was saying the uh i was sorry i was saying that judaism and rastafari uh rastafari uh and ism i i was saying and then i was like shit maybe i dreamt that it's not actually true i don't know but i see here uh zach sent the lake aside from a mutual belief in the old testament judaism and rastafari closely aligned in essence tradition and heritage as both are abrahamic religions i'm not going to

look any further that sentence is enough for me to say that me and rastas are brothers i'm just gonna leave it right there yeah yeah you guys you guys disagree on who the savior is going to be. You guys think that the Messiah will come back, but they think that look to Africa where a black king shall be crowned. He shall be the redeemer. Oh, keep waiting, boys. No, we want that one too. I like that.

I'm Jewish. I want the black redeemer also. You can't double dip on Messiahs. What do you mean? I could say the Messiah and the black redeemer are the same. I expected the Messiah to be black. If he wasn't black, I'd messiah to be black i don't know bro i don't know i like that you're just it's one in the same you're the fusion if it's like some like beautiful looking like uh like dude like coming like like being like i am the messiah i'd be like no you're not bro

fuck are you i'm much more excited about the antichrist than the messiah i'd be like no you're not bro fuck are you i'm much more excited about the antichrist than the messiah who's that gonna be the oh it's the same that's the same for us well my religion is the same guy yeah that's also yeah but i call him the black redeemer now though yeah the black just like yeah he's coming marcus garvey says the black he's coming he's a fuck you guys up he's gonna get us the antichrist i think i think in judaism when the messiah returns we all go we all are all to the kingdom of heaven or some shit like it's over the anti we beat the game we did it he's here we're good the antichrist is like the most comic booky part of the bible like that before the end really comes a fake real end is going to come and you're going to be bamboozled and he's going to make you get like

666 on your forehead or something and or no on your hand something with 666 i know a lot of people are very touchy with religion and stuff like that and you might have the audience we are and it's okay there are a lot of people that'll come and hit me up and be like you fucking worst guest on pka and i'm like suck my jewish sour dick it does happen though in my dms um so i i do know maybe i do trigger some people um but i think like hell's gotta be fucking cool man like i think about it like because like as i understood in my own version of understanding what's going on with all this, like, well, Satan wasn't that bad of a guy, was he? He was just like, just disagreed, you know, or like whatever it is, his background.

How many people did Satan kill? Like one, six, none. That's less than Michael Myers. The answer is zero. But the, the, the, the number of people that God has killed is in the millions and millions. Yeah. Like,

like God, like killed everybody except for like one family at one point. Once again, it was hard thing. Yeah. Well, don't you worry that heaven is like a beautiful field with the ones you love,

but like Vegas is a fucking like hell is Vegas with like party people. I always worry that like, if you're on, if you're in heaven, don't you want a vacation to hell? Do you want to have that option to be like God for like a weekend? Because if hell is Vegas 24 7

for the end of time, that is hell. But even if you're like fully torture, even if hell is total torture after a billion years of nothing but pleasure, you're going to need a point of comparison so you can even appreciate it. So you're going to want to pop for a weekend into hell. But the way I've always imagined it is like –

You think he's torture? Who runs the show? Who runs the show? Satan. Does he sound like he would – With barbs on it covered with like hot sauce. So that's actually – that's a misnomer. Satan is not the ruler of hell.

Satan is supposed to be suffering in hell also. And so I always pictured it like Twilight Zony, that like whatever your version of hell is is what it is, and whatever your version of heaven is what that is. So like for Harvey, or Harley, sorry, if you're fucking

really into Vegas, that's your heaven. And your biggest fear is hell. Like sharks or whatever the fuck. Well, I'm Jewish, so there is no hell. It's not an option. We don't have that. What if we're all wrong and the Mormons buttfuck us?

I've been watching American Horror Story. That sounds like heaven for some, but... It could be. I've been watching American Horror Story, and I just watched the season with the witches, and that's what hell is for them. A couple of them go to hell, and it's like their personal hell. They all

have personal hells they go to in the afterlife and it's different for everyone. Completely different. It has to be personal hells. That's an incredible amount of resources. I don't buy it. That's a lot of resources even for Satan and the gang. A hell for every single person.

How is it operating? Who's monitoring every single person? Who's going in there? And then when you have virtual machines, and it doesn't take as many resources as you think. But it does, because they're going to go and deep dive into every single person. Who's in charge of that? And if this guy's so bad, if this guy's so bad,

you think he's going to do a good job of figuring out what your personal hell is? He doesn't have to. He's a badass. All he has to do is apply a little tweak to you, and then you generate your hell and run it in your head. See, Satan isn't running hell. So you don't think that they're going to be tweaking us all properly? Who are these solid, honest workers that are showing up on time and tweaking you perfectly?

Oh, so now God is like he also owns hell yeah he sounds like that doesn't sound like that nice of a guy though yeah but he loves us are you comfortable if you're in heaven on this beautiful field with god you're like i love you god but you know he's like fucking tweaking maybe like your great-grandfather because your great-grandfather murdered people in a war or some shit he's tweaking him to have the most suffering that he could experience are you really gonna vibe with god in heaven knowing that your family is suffering down there you're gonna have to unless there's like i don't know what the policy is in heaven like once in heaven always or no satan was in heaven and he got booted out so i guess you can still lose once you're the point is is that god loves us so much that he creates a reality in hell for each of us

to endure if we don't believe in him. I saw a bumper sticker the other day and it was one of those bumper stickers that people... The thing on your back window when someone's got a... I hope none of you have done this or know someone's done this. If they have, I apologize.

Are you about to make an apology? Make fun of bumper stickers. Do it no it's it's when people put those memoriams on their back windshield for dead people and it's like stacy moore like dude that has single-handedly ruined a couple chick-fil-a experiences got got her wings too soon or something like that and i'm in my head i'm just like we don't get wings you dumb bitch have you even read the book have you even like we don't get fucking angels are completely different species than us we are people they are angels you don't wait you don't get

wings no you don't get wings first of all angels don't have wings there's nothing written down anywhere that says angels have wings. So let's just knock that out of the park. If Satan has wings, if Satan has wings, I'm going to be mad. I'm going to be like, no, bro. Team wings over here. But secondly, I can't believe I just said team wings on PKA.

I didn't mean it that way. We don't become angels, and they don't become us. We're a completely separate species of thing. No way. I'm not going to get into this shit just on that tonight. That's what I'm reading on. I'm like, yo, angels don't have wings?

Bro, I got a lot to learn. Angels don't have wings. We don't become angels. You don't go to heaven and become an angel? No. You don't become an angel. So the way, honestly, angels got screwed. You wouldn't want to.

If you read the Bible, you can see the angels got fucked. So God created all the angels got fucked so so god created all the angels first you know what and that was that was where lucifer led a third of the angels into hell and rebellion but basically god created all the angels right and then to their face was like eh i need something to keep me going i'm bored as shit i'm gonna make people and all the angels are like like you just made us man like like and so huge insult to angels because god was like i don't even love angels like that i love and he even like writes this fucking book like i love humans so much more than any of these fucking losers that are hanging

out with me up here and so big spit in the face to angels if if i were an angel like i would i would be a low-tier angel i would have been in in the beginning when Lucifer was like, come with me. If I only saw a third of the angels going with him, I'm sticking with God just to be safe, for sure. Because he created me. You've got to stick with the logic. And there's this mean part of me that just wants to yell at them and be like, first of all, your loved one is being – well, we don't get eaten by worms because of the disgusting way they deal with our

bodies. They're just forever like in there, like pumped full of chemicals in a box. But first of all, like your loved one is like looking real weird under the ground. Did you know they sew up your, they put a butt plug in your uncle's ass and so his lips and eyelids shut. Did you know that?

It's like cremation is the way to go. Cause they do every, every, every, every person you've ever seen in a casket had a butt plug in them right then when you saw them. Granny had a butt plug in her. This is getting hot. I don't know. It's getting kind of hot now.

Are they like fun butt plugs? They're the worst kinds of... You like seeing a fox tail trailing down between your grandma's legs? Hang on. Let me find a picture of post-mortem butt plug. I'm going to Google post-mortem butt plug. Kyle, you were talking about those memoriams on the back of cars. Have you ever seen one where it's like 1988

to 1991 and it's like, you got to let it go. The car is older than the kid, yeah that's a 2018 nissan altima like your kid died in 1990 you got a three-year-old kid you lost like get over it he had no personality god he's probably a senior angel by now that kid was shitting himself get out of here uh Are these the butt plugs? Yeah, there you go. Look at that. Look how awful that butt plug looks.

For those who aren't looking, it looks like a normal butt plug, but at the back, it has like big, like a screw. It's like a screw. It looks like an oversized screw. Do they empty out like your bowels or do they just screw the shit into you?

I don't know about emptying the bowels, but they definitely like drain all the fluids out of you. Like, like, like, like, and then they pump you full of, um,

some sort of preservative. And then your eyelids and your mouth are both like, um, uh, they use different methods. I think there's glue. They sew and they've got these double-sided tack things

that are like, I don't know, needles are going into their eyeball and the other needles are going into the eyelid to keep it from moving. It's gruesome as fuck. Get cremated, folks. It's cheap as hell. Are you guys all going cremation also? That's what I want. Get them buried in the ground. Yeah, I'm with Harley.

I'm doing whatever it takes to get this butt plug. I mean, I don't... Exactly. Hey, you just sold us. We can get you one of those. One of those actually came with this. It was a two pack.

All that thing needs is a thread and I can do it. Yeah, no, it's fucking ridiculous. First of all, your loved one is not anywhere. They're rotting in the fucking ridiculous like first of all your loved one is not anywhere they're rotting in the ground and second of all like they under even if all that nonsense you believed in was true we don't get wings and you wouldn't want but maybe if they're like me maybe if maybe if they're me and they're just getting their dick sucked in hell i don't know and even then less less to mourn them they're fine bro don't worry about I get annoyed about that stuff. And even then, less to mourn them. They're fine, bro.

Don't worry about them. They're killing it. If you have to choose between wings and souls, do you pick souls? First of all, they don't get wings. So there are no angels with wings. Angels don't have wings. But second of all, they don't have souls. No one's never seen a Victoria's Secret show.

Yeah, angels also have no souls. They have no souls. What does a soul do for you exactly? lets you go to hell i guess if you don't believe in imagine just what you believed in anything you could have chosen it's what you could have believed what you believed in and if you didn't know better you go there you're like hey you get wings you're in this magical field and then for you they're like nope you didn't believe it this is what you believed you get no wings and the angels hate you and you have to hang out with them every day to me it's important the same way like knowing who spider-man's girlfriend is important it's like like no no no

it's it's it's this not that okay like like no no no venom isn't a bad guy he's sort of an anti-hero like like no superman can't do that he's not like like that's why it's important it's because there's a friend's name mary jane or he's had a couple um there was mary jane and then there's the blonde who's escaping right now superman no i think he said mary jane yeah i did but i was about to say lois yeah lois lane superman yeah yeah um but but like like it's all made up but just because it's made up doesn't mean you shouldn't get it right you know what i mean like like like lots of things are made up but but like i mean movies are made up but don't like

misquote a movie like like get it right when you when you when you say it like yeah it's like when gandalf is about to fall to the balrog and he looks up and he goes get out of here i want to see that one though but i like that one i feel like you know what like there's so many versions there's so many versions which the version which version which one you know what's a good version of the bible is the new king james version because it's a lot of old timey sounding stuff and that makes me feel like it's more real if there's like thighs and vows and shouts shouts shout yeah that feels more real than like i remember i feel like it's more real when it's written in a 3 000 year old language that's true but i can't read like that's pretty real i remember being in like sunday school and like them like having this like printout bible that was like supposed to be cool

and it was like yo jesus it's me john the baptist and i was like i'm seven and this is really gay like i know that this wasn't i read i read the bible as the good news bible or something and it was like an archie comic it was like almost accurate quotes but everything was an archie comic style and like they had speech bubbles it was a comic pretty cool way to go through it yeah some biblical stories are great you know um i mean i remember reading the bible and like after the old testament i was like i don't know i feel like the sequel kind of fell off a little bit. Are there any? Well, you're a little biased there. But it's true.

The real bangers are in the Old Testament. I agree. I agree. The New Testament, it's like all made, 25 snakes with a sword. You know it's all made up, right? Because they've got two halves to this thing. And it would be like if Tolkien wrote the fucking Fellowship and then Tarantino wrote the two towers you're like all right well man gandalf's kind of a badass now that says the

n-word a lot i don't i don't know i guess that's just the way things are now is that how wizards are they say the n-word a lot yeah yeah that is very true like there's also legless has in 1911 now he's been he's been popping caps a lot of fools dude the the character development of god makes no sense that's true because he is an absolute cunt in the old testament like he kills people just for like like someone like what was it what do you mean he is now he is now with what i'm saying in the world now he is right now at this moment but if we if we just happening, though,

we just see him from the perspective. If we just see him from the perspective of the Bible, like in the old Testament, like he's turning follow his own followers into salt for having the audacity to look back at their childhood home, burning to, to the ground in the new Testament. It's like,

dude, guys, come on. Like, just don't be gay. And don't, you know, you know, not believe in me.

Say you're sorry. Hey, apologize. Say, are you sorry? All right, then bring it in here. Come on. You get a lot of chances. You get a lot of chances now. Back then, it was no chance.

It's like, what'd you say to me? 40 days, 40 nights of storm. Yeah, and if you read Revelation. 40 years in the desert. I remember remember being in like like religious class in school and then like we're gonna go through revelation and like that that book doesn't make any fucking sense it really doesn't it doesn't matter what kind of foresight you have it is just rambling what does it make sense about it it's uh it's all written very i guess metaphorically or like distantly where it's like, and there will be six horse or there will be four horsemen and the four horsemen and ride in and their names will be pestilence.

Fuck it. Just blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then this will happen and the sky will turn to blood and all who do not follow me will be destroyed.

Except not really. They'll stick around for a while and there might be a second chain. It's like, it's very disjointed. And cause I've, I've read rebel. It's, it's honestly the most interesting book of the chant and it's like it's very disjointed and because I've read it's honestly the most interesting book of the Bible because it's like a bad acid trip like you really can't tell

what who wrote it who wrote Revelation it wasn't it wasn't Peter what no Peter didn't it was John right who wrote Revelation yeah I'm not gonna be able to help you listen I don't want to I don't want to knock it or anything to everyone. I think I do have personally, I respect people and their choice of their God.

I respect people and their religion. As long as it's not fucking with me or fucking with people that I know or fucking with anyone in general and it's bringing you a happiness and something, that's great. I respect that absolutely i don't think anyone should have their religion disrespected me personally the idea of like there being no afterlife is kind of cool because any chance of an afterlife leads to the conclusion that there could be lots of things that are worse than death like you die and it's like oh yeah no

you didn't know yeah no it's not heaven not hell it's you're in this dark room and there's 4 000 people screaming at the top of your lungs in your face until the end of eternity or something like that where you're like no you float in blackness forever thinking about whatever for eternity like anything eternal like we're not built for that shit and i don't want to go through the next level evolutionary enlightenment that would be required with some torturous afterlife i'll be like life is cool we did it i hope my team of humans are still kicking it out there uh respect to everyone and all that but like i mean if you think about the afterlife like hell's up bro if it's really like as bad as you say it is kind of the

way we describe it yeah it sounds kind of up too you get it is kind of the way we describe it. Yeah. It sounds kind of fucked up too. You get up there and they're like, we have rules here. Get this dick off. Stop sitting around. You smiling? Oh, that would be so funny if you like get up to heaven.

It's like, it's paradise. And then you like go to piss and it's like, oh, no one has a penis in heaven. And it's like, no, you can't fuck.

Cause God's approved. And who cares if everything's made of gold like if everything's made of gold then who cares right like the point of the reason that gold's viable is because there's not a lot of it right like that's cool then because they never saw walls made of gold yeah yeah well you never see such a thing you know god must be like persian because that sounds tacky as hell. Yeah. In the new Loki. Listen to this nonsense. And the dragon stood on the shore of the sea. And I saw a beast coming out of the sea.

He had 10 horns and seven heads with 10 crowns on his horns and on each head, a blast with a blasphemous name. And the beast I saw resembled a leopard, but had feet like those of a bear and the mouth like that of a lion. The dragon gave the beast, his power and his throne and great authority. One of the heads of the beast seemed to have had a fatal wound, but the fatal wound had been healed. The whole world was astonished and followed the beast.

This goes on for like 10 more lines. What is this? Game of Thrones revelations. Game of Thrones. And the white walkers came and all were in despair. It's kind of revelations. He gave a throne. And the white walkers came and all were in despair. It's kind of, yeah. I remember reading that and trying in my head.

I'm like, all right. Ten horns. Seven heads. Some of them don't get two horns. But some of them get two crowns because it's a crown on every horn, not on every head. Okay. And then the mouth of the lion. Did he run out of horns?

Or crowns? Were there more horns before and he lost some? Did some crowns fall off some horns? Which head is dead? Is it one of the side ones being held up strenuously? Or is it like a middle head? Is it like a hydra where you cut one head off and two more sprout up? Is that how we got in this predicament?

We should have killed it outright instead of cutting heads off. There used to just be one head and one crown and two horns. What exactly does Medusa's pubic hair look like? Probably scary. I love what he's total lack of knowledge on the Bible. Oh, yes. John and Peter.

Those are characters. Oh, yes. Do you guys believe in heaven? No. No, but they'd be pretty cool to believe in that. But you wouldn't go, eh? You think you'd make it into heaven if it was real? I don't think you'd get a choice.

I think if you win the game, they force you into heaven. It's like, sorry. You just go to the end. I feel like the rules are stupid. Like, I wouldn't get in based on the rules they made, but I'd do my very best to be a good guy. If someone goes their whole life caring about others and trying to do good things and not being mean,

and they're still like, no, no, no, you didn't hate gay people enough or something, it's like, well, fuck your rules. Oh, you think it's like that? You don't think heaven's like, no, no, we've changed thousands of years ago. People have not got the memo. Being gay is totally cool. I don't know what we were thinking back then. That'd be a more fun heaven if it was like there's pot

and alcohol. Omniscient and omnipotent, but we got it wrong. That's not how that goes. I don't know. I mean, God was wrong. I got it. What's your personal heaven? My personal heaven? Hmm. All right, my personal heaven is... You can eat whatever you want.

You don't gain weight. Yeah, my personal heaven has got to be, like, I get to live out some sort of, like, superhero fantasy because, like, I'm so into, like, the comics and shit that, like, I literally want to be, like, a fucking superhero. Like, I want to be fucking Thor or Superman or something like that and just swing around a city all day and fight crime.

But nothing would be at stake. You would know it was all... I want things to be at stake though because it's my heaven, so I can get hurt. That might be a part of his heaven is where he doesn't know that it's his heaven. I would prefer not to know that it's heaven. I would prefer to just believe that I was Thor, the God of Thunder,

or Superman. I don't know about that, Kyle. You're going to be like Thor, and they're going to be like, brother, there's much to discuss about this Asgardian bullshit. You have a job. It's like heaven. You've got responsibilities. People are like, we don't have enough food, God of Thunder.

And you're like fuck okay it's just like if you want that i want something like that and like my personal warrior i don't know i don't know there's just fighting is that what you want to do you want to kill people fight people smash them with a hammer and fly around and shoot like personal i want to kill lots of people with a hammer yeah personally honestly i guess that's not now that i think about it i could i could accomplish that now you could just go to st louis yeah you could what what if like personal hell i would say like you're in a dmv but people are jamming toothpicks into your fingernail beds i mean that i don't i don't i can think of worse things though, right? Like what about – Two fingers. What about like –

I don't know. I think that – I don't want to say – I think they're like drowning forever. Like what if you were drowning forever and you were always stuck at that point where you were just – That's the worst. That's what I'm saying. Worse than death.

Anything that continues forever, a certain thing would be even like eating your favorite food. Or on repeat, right? Where like you drown to death and then you get a breath and then you drown to death again. Have you guys read Dante's Inferno? No, but I'm aware of it. I don't think you gave the answer to that before you asked it over here. We had to read it in school. We had to read it in school, but like the way, like the, uh, the final,

the lowest circle of hell in that is exactly what Kyle's describing. And it's only for those who like explicitly like betrayed the living Christ. And it's like Judas Iscariot and a couple other, and a couple other people and they're just frozen in ice and living and they can feel everything and they never die and they never no no i went to a private school yeah okay yeah so they they taught us all sorts of religious shit and you're here and you're like there's no heaven no i mean if you wanted a good grade they fucked up if you wanted a good grade you played in i mean i got a good bit of religious education too. I, I look, I don't know what it is that makes people believe. Um, I think that when you are getting older and the end of your life is approaching,

I think that you are more likely to start believing because it sort of gives your life meaning and, and, and you don't have like a stop sign ahead of you you have uh um a uh an intersection ahead of you right instead of instead of just a a wall and i also think that like you know the old adage that there are no um atheists and foxholes can come into play because i think that when we're, I think when any of us are having a real, real rough time, it's like, God, if you're up there. Throw me a bone. Help me out here. Cause this is, I'm doing a lot here.

If you could help a lot, if you could just help a little, I'd really appreciate it. I don't know if you're that kind of God, that interventionist God or anything. Like, I really wish you were like the America of gods right now. And you just saw oil fields all over this nonsense I'm dealing with. And you could just swoop in and help out a little bit. No, but he doesn't tend to help. But and I also think and it's completely separate. I don't think it's fair to like paint all religious people with the same brush.

I think that there are people who are just dumb. I think there are people who are just dumb who are religious. I don't think that all are people who are just dumb. I think there are people who are just dumb who are religious. I don't think that all religious people are dumb, but I think that most dumb people are religious. Maybe. There's a bunch of stupid-ass non-religious people too. I don't know if that's true. Oh, for sure.

What about those people that get touched by someone and they're like, ah, they're like, the demon! Let the demon come on! And they're like, ah! I think those people were attention whores. Nobody's ever looked at that person because they've never done anything interesting before until

they started flopping around on the floor on a televangelist show. And they're all like, can we provide her to be flopping? It's like religious virtue signaling where like if the person next to you is speaking in tongues because they were so consumed by the spirit of the lord and you're not speaking in tongues what does that mean it means that they're winning they're winning that little battle in the pew right now so you better start going also i said once i got brought with a i spent the night at a

friend's house when i was in maybe grade school and i went to his church with his family the next morning and they were one of those churches and it was bizarre like people would just like start staying just right in the middle of the dude talking people just stand up and and you like and even at that time i'm like these guys aren't good at improv they're using a lot of the same sounds over and over and i went to the same kind of church. You're not supposed to laugh in church, and I didn't as a fucking 10-year-old me, but we're just sitting there, and the preacher's fucking telling us a bunch of lies, and then this old man behind me that seemed very normal because he gives me a peppermint every time when I come in the door just starts having a fucking conniption fit back there and speaking in a nonsensical language that he's making up. And it's just like,

this is just comedy hour. I know why dad refuses to come now. Like, this is bullshit. This is bullshit. Why is mom dragging this here? Why do I have to come when dad doesn't? I wish dad had so much work to do that he needed me today and I didn't have to be here. I would so much rather be like working somewhere right now than listening to this nonsense or sitting in that ladies class. My Sunday school teacher had been crippled as a young girl and was in a wheelchair. And this is the woman who is telling me about the love of the lord it's like it's like you were a very pretty promising young lady and then your legs were taken out from under you at 19 years old and here you are 55 years old and single teaching me about the love of the lord

in your fucking chair that's so that's the best person to teach to be honest with you because you're there and it's like how could you not look who we got this is like that's like a top tier person to come and like explain something like that you know what i mean a successful dude bringing a dude who's getting pussy like you know what because i believe in God. I need him to come in and be like Alec Baldwin in... What's that movie that I... You know the name of it, but I don't. This is a good one. It's like...

It's a name repeated. It's like... Something, something, something, something. Green Valley or something. Yeah, there's like some Gs in there. You know what they should have? Gary Glenn Ross or something? Glenn Ross, Gary Glenn.

Oh, that sounds good. They should have... I need Alec Baldwin. You see this watch? This is a $90,000 watch. Did you see my BMW outside? That's the Lord. That's the Lord. I need him talking about how big his dick is,

how much pussy he gets, how big and expensive his watch is. That's the guy that runs the church? That's the guy that runs the church outside of church, by the way. You just want Trump the pastor. He's like, my cock's huge and it's because of God.

That's why I don't listen to this crippled bitch. If God loved her, he would have made her president. Am I right? He's doing like type five. He's lying the whole time because his hands are so small. I agree with all that shit

too. Like what you said there, like if God loved her, she wouldn't be a cripple. Yeah. Like if I wouldn't cripple somebody I loved, I'd cripple somebody I didn't give a fuck about or some little like puppet. What do you mean he fucks us all up, bro? I loved, I'd cripple somebody I didn't give a fuck about. Or some little puppet that I went to play with.

Tons of rapists can still walk. Most rapists can still walk. When's the last time you heard of a crippled rapist? Okay, all rapists can... I wouldn't say that. I wouldn't say that either. You don't think so? You don't think that

rapists can... Name one crippled rapist. Well, Cosby in the end. I don't know any. I don't think so? You don't think that rapists can... Name one crippled rapist. Well, Cosby in the end. I don't know any. I don't know any by name, but I'm just saying statistically there's got to be. I'm just going by numbers, like a numbers game here. So real quick,

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for that 100% authentic sneaker. So check them out. Take advantage of that. So there you go. So I believe my friend Ari turned me on to this new subreddit. So these young ladies are known as the Connelly twins. Do anybody know who the Connelly twins are? I have not heard of that. So their subreddit is just r slash the Connell twins. No, why? I mispronounced. C-O-N-N-E-L-L twins.

And don't bother going because I have a better link. I'm there. That I'm going to drop in here. Here you go. So these are the Connell here. Here you go. So these are the Connell twins. Fatfappy.com Ignore the fact that it's on Fatfappy.com

There's literally a dick and an ass now in the link you sent me. I'm sure there are going to be many dicks and many asses in the links that I send you. They're pouring milk on themselves. Yes. Yes, yes they are so these are incestuous twin only fans girls okay waiting for the shoot how incestuous what's very incestuous

um the more you scroll just like i gotta say it's to me i'm just so happy i'm not like choosing to like fuck my brother on the internet like my gig isn't uh fucking 69 with my birth brother like on a bed while like our buddy takes pics of us it's girls so it has like a sexiness to it but i just what a what a bummer am i right guys that'd be awesome no you're saying brother though what about twin what if it's what if it's your twin just imagine me but a girl and it's like like i just don't want to fuck the me of a girl, to be honest with you. No, no, no. If I was a hot like this, that's what I'm talking about, my twin. I don't want to fuck my twin brother.

I don't want that. I'm scrolling through this website. Not incestuous enough. I'm just saying. I know you got to pay for that stuff maybe. You got to pay for that. They go down on each other and stuff. They even got the same tattoos.

Oh, okay. That's an interesting piece of information zach yeah thanks man um yeah i i'm i'm a big fan of the connoisseur no disrespect though it's uh they're they're pretty hot they got a little bit of a five head thing going on but um i think you can excuse that because they're banging each other and they're related. There's a video at the top. Yeah, so you can excuse it. You can excuse it.

You excuse that away, right? You know, it's just like, all right, well, I mean, you put up with some things when you bang your sister. So, but no. It's actually totally cool with the buyback. Lesbian video of me and my sister, $50. $50. I respect everyone's hustle. I really do. Just happy that that's not my hustle. I'm respect everyone's hustle. I really do.

Just happy that that's not my hustle. I'm happy that's not what I'm doing. I don't think you'd make much money. No, that's what I'm saying. I'm just happy that I'm not even that hot where I sit there with my other hot twin. I'm like, should we lick each other's pussies for some cash? I'm happy it's not an option or anything like that.

But you know what? I'm sure they're killing it. I think this level of dedication where you're going to fuck your sister, that level of dedication, you probably would have excelled at anything you guys set your mind to. Dude, they're probably going to be well-adjusted later in life. I don't know why we care about

any of these things. I don't care if they fucking kill each other. I don't care if they commit suicide in the i don't have to get i don't care if they like oh well listen i'm only i'm taking the conversation this way because i don't want to beat off on pka oh my god i don't want to get that later i don't want to get horny with like taylor woody and yourself you know what i mean so that's yeah i mean that's where i'm at so i'm only i'm only scrutinizing it I mean, it's not me fucking my brother. Cause really like, yes, they, they're very attractive here. Yeah.

I could see myself coming back to this link. Absolutely. At a later date. But I do think it is, it is interesting though. Isn't it? Like that's a hustle. Everyone's got their hustles. I mean, my hustle has been weird enough doing shit on YouTube.

You know, you guys have both had weird hustles before. But my I just this is a hustle in itself. And I'm like, I'm glad that's not mine. That's not what I'm doing. That seems like an easier hustle, though. I wish that I was a hot chick that could bang my sister and be like top 1% on OnlyFans. I wish I was like a hot girl that reacted to youtube videos like i'd rather be i'd rather be like sniper wolf than these girls i'd rather watch like eight youtube videos and sit

there and be like ha ha ha then they're leaving this like million millions of dollars like house you know what i mean but then i'm sure people are like oh that guy i wish i wrapped my dick in bacon for the last 10 years Played video games on fucking the internet Um, you know, there's always going to have that I think I saw a picture of chick doing um doing asmr the other day Where she had the microphone stuck like so far Into the ass crack of her yoga pants and pre I think she was farting into the mic. I think that's what was going on I think she was doing some fart asmr um think she was farting into the mic i think that's what was going on i think she was doing some fart asmr um and she was super hot uh but but i think that that's the next step now that they've demonetized the hot tubs oh no they they don't know what they did was they made a section for

hot tubs they made a special section and then they they they found the new meta was asmr like licking the ear microphone and stuff um and uh then the two uh microphone licking queens got banned a temporary ban for that so that asmr they're gonna have to pull that back now because they were like it was like you had to pay more for eye contact and then they were just like doing fake blow jobs on this microphone on Twitch. Like it was, it was really, it was really something special there.

It was, it was really a thing. You hear that kids? Jesus Christ. It's so fucked up. What goes on over there? I don't get it. I don't get it.

Like I, I watch a good bit of Twitch. Like, like I usually watch on my TV. I don't interact or anything. I just, I don't know. I'll send a donation. I don't get it. I watch a good bit of Twitch. Like I usually watch on my TV. I don't interact or anything. I just, I don't know. I'll send a donation. I'll hit, I'll hit somebody up with my Twitch prime. But, but I'll just like put landmark or or some,

like some magic streamer on my, on my TV. And if I'm in my bedroom just chilling and I'll watch a couple hours of that. And I, at no point am I like, man, I wish Landmark would make eye contact with me right now and lick the microphone. It's such a decision. It's such a move to do that. Like, that's a hustle in itself, though. Like, licking the microphone. The girls that choose to lick the microphones and stuff on Twitch, they made this choice.

And they do that every day like if i didn't like hanging with my friends and cooking in a kitchen and making funny videos then this would be a hellish job and i think a lot of people are like oh i want to be famous and they start licking a microphone and it's like yo if you get traction you got to start licking a microphone like you're not going to be happy when that's your life like some people you got to just make sure you're happy with what you're doing ultimately because it's too it's too easy to end up doing something that could be what you repeat doing and it would just suck i don't know if my internet's good enough to talk to you but is it so bad right like if you don't have job skills that can earn good money but you have the option to lick a mic for cash it's like

a lot of cash too a lot of cash so you're right yeah i got a mic right here i'll lick that fucker for 100 bucks what if you don't make it what if you don't make it and then you just put the content like like what about the people who like wanted an only fans they did it it wasn't worth it they stopped doing it but everyone in their town checked it out for a couple weeks, and now they just have an OnlyFans existence that does nothing for them, and they still cross that line.

By the way, this is a hilarious thing here for right after on the ASMR. On one hand, I agree with you, Harley. On the other, nowadays, though, is that so bad? Oh, do nudes exist of you? Nudes exist of everybody under 30. Yeah, I know.

I don't think it's a bad thing. I mean, I don't think it's a bad thing at all. And I respect everyone's hustle. But I would definitely impose on my daughter that that is something she should seriously consider never ever doing. Because you leave a digital footprint and that might not be the best digital footprint on my daughter that that is something she should seriously consider never ever doing um because you leave a digital footprint and that might not be the the best digital footprint that you want

to leave should you don't get to pivot you know you don't really get to pivot after that it's hard to pivot that's sound unless you're doing it safely or whatever um but yeah it's like listen it's a very very last resort there's like 18 year old 19 year old girls that go and do that and i'm like well shit i hope you make the good money because it might you know might be something you want to keep a secret later or you're unhappy with and i say this not from my experience or anything but like you know i watch like people like prominent porn stars that opt to do porno and then later are like i should have never done that um so i don't, but just be sure of it. Definitely. And you mentioned on that link, I sent us a clip. Sorry. I was going to say, you mentioned your hypothetical daughter.

She's in an extra tough spot because she's going to be born a little famous. People will have an interest in her that she doesn't get to be dumb privately. Yeah, maybe, or maybe I just see now that there's so many people that are like famous or have an audience that like i feel like it just means less now you know we grew up in a time where like if you were famous at any point well you're going to be famous for 15 years like if you were a famous musician you're famous for like 20 years but like youtubers it just it's so fast you know what i mean yeah the turn like you might be recognizable but you might not be like as iconic as as like uh

you know lead singer of guns and roses or something like that you know um you got to check this clip by the way it was just me popping into the asmr um you can pull it up on the screen here if you want um i was trying to make the point that i was just making now uh it was this twitter link you were in the asmr category no i just went to go look at it oh and i just happened to catch like a really phenomenal moment of uh amherst i was trying to prove the point that i was like this person's like she's intense she does this job all the time non-stop do something that you can imagine doing all the time now. I will tell you this girl right here Pants are like inside her. Do what she's doing.

You want to do it because you don't want to do this. Jesus Christ. You get to the level. I know how to take my twitch to the next level. Just my, I know how to take my Twitch to the next level now. I couldn't even make my point because it was just so crazy what she's doing. But I think that's content, actually, but normally it's not like that. Get this girl 400 more subs so that she can do her cosplay suit and pick something else. They get the gold.

They reach the gold that stream. Of course. I was there. Jesus Christ. But yeah, then she got the temporary ban after that and what'd she do that that they banned her for that well yeah because then she takes it off and then she's like eating it like i don't even want to do an impression of it because it's actually really nauseating especially coming from me but she's like sucking the mic and stuff

like that so they banned them for that because they're basically like sucking it like it's like a dick and like looking at the camera and you it just got to that point where it was very sexual so they did the temporary ban which essentially what that does is like the biggest promo those girls can get because then everyone looks and sees them and notices them and yeah i don't like when people get mad at that content they're like oh my god this bitch is doing this i'm like no no that's fine she's fine it's the guys that are jerking off on twitch you got to have an issue with why is this guy on twitch jerking off to the girl i do think that's funny when people like i would be amaranth she's a really big streamer but

i do think i i agree with you harley people are like i'm not succeeding on twitch because there are girls showing their asses and and it's like is that the audience you're appealing to like am i gonna get less viewers making fun of youtube videos because someone's in a hot tub no like yeah literally like the no one's no one was coming to your room scape stream to jerk off but they're here jerking off it was never gonna be you bro yeah and if you're mad at anyone get mad that there are people coming here and jerking off on twitch and encouraging it if anything but once again i don't really you know it's like one of those don't hate the player hate the game yeah in the game they made it like a totally different category so now it's like don't hate the player don't hate the game just to hate the audience i guess

hate everyone that's buying tickets here you go but yeah what is this don't pay oh we can't show that no you can't don't show that What is this? Don't pay. Oh, we can't show that. No, don't show that. Okay. Well, all right. Well, that's entertainment. I knew this already, though.

I knew this already. Harley hosted this link I just sent you, actually. Harley's on the ball. That's so funny. Good times. That's a hustle right there, killing it. Do your thing. I haven't streamed on Twitch in a while. There were nights leading up to the wedding and everything and all that.

I was like, I could stream tonight, but like, there was like just a base, like a higher than normal baseline level of just nervousness and anxiety and excitement where I'm like, I don't think I would be very funny tonight if I did. So I, I'm excited to get back to it. Like my Facebook thing just ended. It just ended on last, this month. This is my first month. No, I mean, basically,

I don't know what kind of details I can give of it, but it just wasn't worth it. But rather than continuing to stream there because I didn't move forward, I would be starting not as a partner, but I already have partnership with Twitch and on YouTube.

So why would I go back and work back up to that place? So I went to Twitch and Twitch has been great. I've been there for a month. And yeah, man, if you ever want to get down, I know we always say that,

but at least now I'm on Twitch or maybe Woody comes back to takes us through some Tarkov. That'd be a fun three-way stream or something like that. I don't know, bro. All right. I'm following you boys step up and download Battlefield 2042 when it comes out.

How about you download Magic the Gathering Arena? Oh, a game that can place the matches. There are four people here. We could all download that new Vermintide. I have that. I have Vermintide. I have that.

I have Vermintide. Oh, he's talking about the new one when it comes out. Oh, okay, the new one. Yeah, the one I'm excited about. Yeah, it's coming out. Have you seen the new Loki? No, I guess it'd be only yesterday, right? I've only seen two of them. They're cool about that, though.

They release it Tuesday night at midnight, if that makes sense. only yesterday right yeah i've only seen two of them they're cool about that though they release it tuesday night at midnight if that makes sense like like the moment it is technically wednesday it comes out uh um i watched it i won't spoil anything i liked it i heard someone call it a filler episode but to me it's been the most fun episode because talk about loki yeah yeah yeah yeah i i thought it was good a lot of people were mad because i don't think this is a big spoiler but like um loki sort of mentions that he's bisexual of course got it got a virtue signal fluid or something yeah yeah i know he mentions that he's bisexual and you know it's it's it's pride month so gotta get that in there no they showed his id and on his id under uh gender it said fluid no um what i'm referring

to is in the episode right um she uh he doesn't make me wrong i'm telling you they showed his id in the loki show and they said he was gender fluid it was i believe that happened okay um but but what i'm referring to is is him just saying that he was bisexual but do you think do you think that that was like they were filling some sort of SJ quota? Or do you think that Loki gives birth to a wolf? Does he give birth to a wolf? He's a mother and a father. Loki is that himself.

He also dresses like a girl to get information. He's like her maverick. Loki is hardly a a person but when you really break it down into our simple mortal terms then yeah he's definitely fluid because i mean he gives birth to a wolf yeah he's not like he dresses like women it depends if you're going from like norse mythology or from marvel comics right because they're they're pretty different uh interpretations of Loki, who is the trickster god, and he is

the Norse version of the devil. But if you're going by Norse mythology, then there was the time when he turned himself into a horse and got fucked by another horse and gave birth to a horse. What was the point of that? He's Loki, man. He's always goofing around.

He's a trickster he's having a good time does he uh when he births wolves are they like fighting members of his team um or is that not like i mean i know they're not going to show a scene of him birthing wolves in marvel but can he like is that one of his powers he commands wolves i don't know if that's a marvel it's fenrir it's therir. It's the big wolf. And in Marvel, he's not the father and mother of Fenrir, but they both exist. Yeah. Well, I mean, yeah.

I don't know. I don't know how they handle it. Honestly, commanding wolves wouldn't be a very useful power. It's a big wolf. Oh. Yeah, it's a monstrous wolf. If it's a big monstrous magic wolf, then that changes the game. It is.

Yeah. Doesn't the wolf kill thor no mythology everything's happened i don't know about marvel uh i i haven't read a lot of the marvel comics or like watched the videos of the comics which is what i actually do i don't read paper comics because that's fucking weird hey come on you own like do you own like paper comics like i read them on an ipad but a yeah see i've done that i've done that that's different like i've read a bunch of the walking dead shit like that and then i also found like um this youtube series for the walking dead where the guy like basically like flips digital pages and reads to you but at the same time he'll also be

like what you got to keep in mind here is this, this, that are happening. So that's pretty cool. Oh, he sells it. He sells it. Cause he'll get to a part of like,

now, if you remember, and like, he'll be like, like, like two issues ago, this is a big deal. I,

I watched that guy. I know what channel you're talking about. It's a good one. Yeah. Speaking of like fantasy stuff, we got heart Harley. Have you ever read the stormlight archive no have you heard of it no so it's it's called the stormlight archive woody and i what he's

listening to it like we're we're going through the whole series every book is like 1200 pages of like dense good fantasy like really good fantasy it's the best fantasy i've read in fucking forever let me know when netflix is buying it well i'm kyle was saying just like on tuesday during pkn was like hey you know i got a lot on my plate i'm not sure if i want to jump into a you know 5 000 page book series and then i texted in our group and i'm like kyle told me to mail you the books knowing that there's no excuse not to read them once i've sent him $100 worth of books. And so I packaged him up and

shipped him off to him yesterday morning before he could say no. And so Monday you've got 3,500 pages of books coming to you and you are gonna like it. And Harley, I know you're a fantasy guy. Stormlight Archive by Brandon Sanderson. You'll really enjoy it.

Is it related to Mistborn? It is the same guy. Okay, but not a different series though? Completely different series. Because Mistborn gets recommended on Reddit all the time. Oh, well, I'm sure it's good. He's an excellent author. I bought the Mistborn series to read after this one.

I bought every single book that Brandon Sanderson has written. I will take this recommendation. I'm on it. Stormlight Archives. That blows me away, Taylor. Oh, I'm in a reading phase. I'm reading everything. I'm just loving it.

It's great. I have Trailer Park Boys. Now my new background show is I put on Trailer Park Boys, turn the volume down a bit, and then I read Stormlight Archives. That's what I'm going to do right after this. At first, I thought you were going to say you were reading the Trailer Park Boys books. I was like, you read their books? I don't think there are.

That would be ridiculous. It would be very short books. Yeah, I'm going to start on it. As soon as it gets here, I guess, I'll pick it up. I am this way with books, though. If I get 50 pages in and I'm not interested yet, I'm done. I will not. I'm not going to. I'm done. Like, like, like I,

I will not like, I'm not going to sit there for, I can't sit there for two hours or something. You're going to enjoy like this. One of this guy's like, like rules of writing is like limitations are more interesting than powers. And like, that is true.

And so like, unlike a lot of fantasy series where it's like, you know, Kaladin can fly. That's what he can do or whatever it is. He like lays out like the actual magic series where it's like, you know, Kaladin can fly. That's what he can do or whatever it is. He like lays out like the actual magic thing where he's like, it's called the lashing. And that's how you change your direction.

You can do a half one to hover and you can change your direction in the air. Cause all it is, is you're not flying. You're changing where gravity pulls you. So you can change and say, gravity pulls you to the side. So you're flying there. You can change your direction.

It's very, it's it's very it's super interesting you got to give it i will absolutely give us a shot and and woody did you know that we talk about it that uh three body problem is coming to netflix no yeah netflix bought it and the the guy who was in charge of the rights to it was like poison through a meal, like in December, 2020, just a side note. Maybe it's related,

but there was billions. It was like a billion dollars on the table for it. It was like really expensive deal and they didn't want to like sell it. And they sold it to Netflix and some guy that was involved in the company died. But yeah, now that you say it, we talked about it on the show,

I remember. That always happens. Dude, when I listen to the Stormlight Archives, I think about it as a Netflix show, and it would be expensive to me. Do you hear about Lord of the Rings? Amazon Prime show? Yeah. $350

million per episode. They are going to ruin Lord of the Rings. And nobody is cast yet. I have no confidence in Amazon doing Lord of the Rings at all. Why don't you think it would be good? I just can't picture Amazon doing that great a job portraying the Lord of the Rings. I'll tell you one thing. I'll tell you one thing.

The Expanse is a phenomenal show. and the most recent seasons have been on amazon the boys is one of the best shows i've seen on tv um i know it's uh animated but invincible is also one of the best shows they have like three of my favorite shows and and they make them they have my trust now in a sense, better than Netflix does. I thought Jack Ryan was quite good. I like Jack Ryan, but I also like the one that everyone hated, Michael B. Jordan. No, Amazon, they're going to put in a bunch of extra characters

or remove characters. What story would you want them to tell as a Lord of the Rings guy guy you wouldn't want them to do the same thing again right wouldn't you want them to do what was that book called the silmarillion yeah there's a bunch of stories there or whatever there's a ton of stories in the silmarillion but the silmarillion is also like the disjointed ravings of a madman like in a large way where it's like like he'll finish like and this is what happened in the first stage oh but also this happened and this large way where it's like like he'll finish like and this is what happened in the first stage oh but also this happened and this is another thing it's really not it's it's structured so poorly it's difficult it really if you've ever read it's difficult to get through i would say i

would like them to go to the first stage where they were physically fighting sauron that would be cool go back then where it's elrond, Gandalf, like obviously Saruman is on the right side at that point. Like that would be interesting. I would like that. I don't want to see them rehash the same series while adding and removing characters needlessly because I just have in my head this fear that they're going to do what they did with the Hobbit where they just throw random bits in for no reason and remove other bits and it just it you they lose the plot at some point oh fuck the hobbit you know what they should do they should also like on the topic of ruining things um they should take uh because apparently george rr martin's finishing game of thrones and like fuck game of thrones right

yeah i think they should take like the last three seasons and fix it and just do it and like give it to like some cool ass japanese anime company and like release it like that i'd watch it wouldn't be that expensive dude i'd watch that too especially if like if they care if they if they came back and voiced their part their roles i would absolutely watch an animation fixing the last season of game of thrones you know my dumbest statement was was like was like seven years ago when I was like Game of Thrones is better than Lord of the Rings I take that back now I think Game of Thrones is better than Lord of the Rings um if they had if they had in every way they're incest bro aren't you keeping up with him?

I think it's a more adult series. I think that Lord of the Rings is kind of like they got kid gloves on for so much of it. Nothing bad really happens to any of our main characters. Some of those hobbits should have gotten stomped the fuck out of. No one got their dicks cut off.

Nobody got their dicks cut off. Nobody died. Ormir died. Gandalf died. Gandalf came right back and he got a badass suit. Gandalf got upgraded. Not only did he get upgraded, Azorah...

Who's the god in Lord of the Rings? I know Morgoth is like the devil like the valor no like the god like the the creator of every of everything the guy who created the valor oh i don't know how the fuck anyway that guy like pulled gandalf to like his fucking iru or something to to his like timeless temple or whatever like like and and you know gave him the white robes and and and and all the extra powers and everything and like like so he didn't really die like it's an it's a cool part of the story because you you don't realize that he's gonna come right the fuck yeah um but but like i don't know it's it's a bit of a it's more of a

teen series look i love it it's one of my favorite things ever you just prefer the brutality of the Game of Thrones and you feel like it's a little more real I like the stakes because like if look if Martin had written the Lord of the Rings they might not have destroyed the ring

you know what would have happened? Mary and Pippin would have been like 69ing in that cornfield they would have been fucking so much bro know what would have happened? Merry and Pippin would have been like 69ing in that cornfield. They would have been fucking so much, bro. Gandalf would have definitely banged What about second breakfast? Licking Merry's ass. Right here between my legs, little hobbit.

That's the way it would have gone. Aragorn would have molested them once they got out into the wilds. I'm not sure my mic is good enough to participate. Lord of the Rings didn't have enough stakes. No, I meant to say Game of Thrones didn't have enough stakes. Once you figured out who the whatever lot armor was.

I've said this time and time again. Jon Snow should have died. He did. Jon Snow should have died. Absolutely. Why'd he come back? Why'd he come back? He should have died. He did. Jon Snow should have died. Why did he come back? Why did he come back? He should have died. Walking Dead has higher stakes than any other show there is. See, I read that one.

Name a safe character on Walking Dead. You know what show has the highest stakes? My 600-pound life. Because they will be told by that mean iranian man like you are going to die if you don't get it and it is uh and they'll be like i was eating nothing more than 200 calories a day and i've still lost you have lost 13 pounds in the last month you are lying let's get him as a guest actually we need to be careful who we get as a guest because we've had a lot of deaths we've had a lot of deaths um unfortunately we we just had a a new one just the other day uh john mcafee um oh yeah that's right crazy

yeah and it's interesting because he had said that if he's like, I'm happy in prison, the food is good, the people are nice. If anything happens to me, they killed me. And then he dies. Like he hangs himself like a couple days later. That's so wild. That's what I don't know. Like what? I know he's a big tech guy and he was like uber wealthy.

Like, you know what I think it was? What? I think John Mcffey really loves attention like i think he's i think he's a very smart attention whore and he was like they've got me i'm not dying in prison maybe even he was sick um you know maybe maybe he had some maybe he had cancer or something he was really old he was very old he didn't look healthy like maybe he was just like i'm gonna kill myself but they're gonna talk about me for a long time how funny would it be though if it was john mcafee who actually had like a dead man switch and a bunch of shit it wouldn't get covered if he even had any damaging stuff but that would be funny that of all people it's the absolute maniac who said that we were dumb for not doing,

or we were what pussies for not having tried heroin before. Yeah. I mean, I would try it. I don't know where to get it, John. Helen released the, Oh,

it was 76. I think 76 in prison, you know, like, like maybe, maybe, maybe he killed himself, but my guess is he killed himself um the the fact that he had like been so adamant that like if i die they did it like i think he's

a like i think he really loves the attention i think it's what 18 months was a death sentence for that dude maybe maybe maybe like maybe it's rich people live a ton of time now. He's a drug addict. That's true. I don't know if he's a drug addict, but I feel like he definitely enjoys his drugs. Drug user and drug addict are different things, though.

I think he's definitely enjoyed his drugs. But I mean, he was doing such weird stuff though right it wasn't like he's like yeah i see you know i shoot up some heroin every day i have to it was just like yeah i like to put little droplets of heroin in my eardrum i can hear the world and he was clearly bloviating a lot of that because he was pretending like hey sasha or whoever the woman was like pour the other half of that bottle of gin into this glass and bring it to me.

And it's like, dude, you did not just at 76 drink a whole bottle of gin in 30. There's no way. Come on. He was talking about weird drugs we had never heard of that you needed an atomic scale to get the right amount or you'd die. Do you remember that? Yeah, and that's the kind of thing I don't want to fuck with. It's the kind of thing i do want to fuck with it makes me think money just doesn't solve everything you know it's things like that it's like that's like really it because you could like be like i

gotta get this drug that's on the atomic level of something it's like man you could just buy a ps5 from a scalper even you know like you could just you know but five from a scalper even, you know, like you could just, you know, but like, that's not it. They said, there's obviously more there.

There's, there's more, there's things that money just doesn't sort out. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'd be like, have you seen, uh,

I saw something about Britney Spears. Oh yeah. Like sounds like a blast in the, where she's talking about how like her dad, like when she was having a mental breakdown years and years ago like basically took control of her whole life and like was her power of attorney was everything and she was saying like yeah they had an iud implanted in me and i really want to have kids but i'm not allowed to remove it without his permission like some some really fun and they put

they put her on a conservatorship A conservatorship. The documentary is really the free Britney documentary that talks about all this is actually really interesting because I didn't know that this could even exist to this extent. It sounds sad. They put a device in her. Absolutely.

It's really fucked up. I was at the time where we were like, ah, Britney britney silly bitch she shaved her head she's so silly rich people are fucking you have no idea like this person's like life has been really fucked up the medication she's forced to take everything and i'm like i had no idea that things could be like that but that's like a court ordered thing yeah how is that really fucked up exactly it's so fucked up and even just like her therapist the amount of drugs he puts her on and stuff like that um they like keep her

complacent it's really fucking crazy that's a it's legal it should be legal it just shouldn't i don't know if it should apply to britney right there was a time where britney made her own decisions she would fuck things up really bad so you can kind of get why they got it in the first place we're doing it for colin colin just to be able to put an iud in her though is like a next level thing on an adult woman that like you know you're doing all this but like at the same time she can go touring but she can go do concerts you know everywhere and like you know you could like you could iud thing is fucked. So look, with Brittany, it is totally fucked and I get it and I'm on your side.

If Colin was a girl, maybe that's a decision we make, right? He can't have kids. But what if he's a woman? I think we're all saying that this makes sense in some situations, but this one definitely seems fucked.

I don't know how they applied it to Brittany. Maybe she needed an 18-month conservatorship definitely seems fucked. I don't know how they applied it to Brittany. There might've been like, maybe she needed an 18 month conservatorship, you know, where it's like, look, you're crazy right now. You're shaving your hair off.

You're likely to destroy yourself. You're not thinking straight. Mom and dad are just going to, you know, act as your guardians for the next 18 months until you can get back on your feet. Now it seems like it's been 18 years with her. It's fucked.

Right. Yeah. But am I coming through? Okay. Yeah. It's fucked, right? Yeah. But am I coming through okay? Yeah, you're coming through fine. Okay. But, you know, if your kid has Down syndrome, conservatorship is what you do. For sure.

Yeah, she's... Good Lord, she's 39. She's almost 40 years old. Britney Spears. She was like the superstar when I was in middle school and stuff. So perennially, I'm always like, yeahars she's like she was like the superstar when like i was like in middle school and stuff so like perennially i'm always like yeah she's like like 20 23 like young but no yeah not at all yeah i remember walking into a taco bell my mom my dad my sister and uh there was like a a cardboard cutout of britney spears just you know super fucking hot and my dad's like wow and my mom goes she's 16 lamar

and he's like fuck i don't know she's like i remembered this time because when i was 16 she was like 16 or i was even a couple years younger and i was like i swear bro if i could talk to her if i could talk to her she would want to give me a hand job i was like i swear bro if i could talk to her if i could talk to her she would want to give me a handjob i was convinced i was convinced i could get a handjob from britney spears if i just had a moment to crack some jokes say some some things i swear i was like i could she'll definitely want to do it yeah i just i just found this tweet screenshot from john mcafee he said my muslim cellmate explained that if i die in the service of Allah, I will receive 56 virgins when I go to heaven. 56 virgins? What kind of God is that?

I would trade 56 virgins for one Bangkok prostitute any day of the week. R.I.P. F's salutes for John McAfee. Oh, that's... I guess we'll never... We have He Died, Nate from 60 Days In Died. Bro, stop talking about this. I don't want to die.

I don't want to die. I feel like we're cursing me here. All right, we're going to do a death poll. Yes, I have Harley. Oh. No, that would be... He's like 500 pounds. We're going to do a death pool. Yes, I have Harley. Oh. No. He's like 500 pounds. He's going to prison.

Who? Name a better pick. Boogie? Boogie's not going to really go to jail. Probably. I said that about myself before, but I was wrong. I don't know. He might go to jail. He might go to prison.

But I don't think that it's – he belongs on a death pool. If anything, he'll lose weight in prison. Oh, that's the thing, though. You don't have to lose weight in prison. You can get as much food as you want in there if you really want it. And he's got plenty of cash. So, like, he could – or, like, he's got plenty to afford, like, as much food as he wants in prison.

He'll be buying snacks for the whole block. Yeah, it depends what he wants to do. You'll be buying snacks for the whole block. Yeah. It depends what he wants to do. You know, I remember, um, uh, that's what snow told me once he was like,

some people, they come in here, man, they, they lose a ton of weight. Some people come in here and they gain a ton of weight. And it's like, I'm so mad if I got fat in prison,

dude, I guarantee I'd be that guy who just stress ate the entire time and i'd come out there was a there was a guy who was in there who looked like awful because he had lost so much weight over the last like three or four years just like he looked i mean he had went from like 600 pounds to like 270 or something like that and it was like oh my god i you are just all wrinkly now you look like one of those like one of those like turner and hooch dogs with its like face hanging all over and wrinkles and stuff like that oh that will resonate with our audience the turner and hooch yeah you guys get the turner and hooch reference right everybody gets that right you've all seen

that that classic tom hanks movie from 1986. There's a reboot on Disney Plus right now. Turner and Hooch. Yeah, with Josh Peck. You've seen Turner and Hooch. The guy from Drake and Josh? Yeah. Okay. You know what?

Not the other one. Not the other one with the underage girls. Who did that? The other one. Not Josh, then Drake. Oh, and I thought you were were like there's another josh pack but drake was doing underage girl shit yeah that's that's recent messages and stuff and things so josh ended up being the cool guy the whole time even though he was fat i always knew that

you always knew that i never watched that show but i remember seeing the the commercials and shit and yeah i never watched that show either i I remember seeing the commercials and shit. Yeah, I never watched that show either. I was like, I missed that. That was like right before me. Right after you. Yes, right after me. Yeah. You're 30?

Yeah, I'm 30. So it was a little. Yeah, what an old idiot. You're so stupid. What a retard. I mean, I didn't watch that. No, you chose, but it's your people. You chose not to, though.

That's pretty cool of you, man. You were a cool kid ahead of your time. You were like, all my friends watched Drake and Josh. I'm Lord of the Rings. It didn't come out until I was in late middle school, so nobody was watching it. I can't even click this link. It's like, pay me, pay me.

You know what I do want to see? Usually, I kind of hate reboots, but when it's animated stuff stuff it makes sense to me because it's like like you're i don't know it did it feels like you can still do it again like you just draw the same characters right do the voices and like stay true to the source material and like it's as good as new they're uh they're remaking he man and i'm so kevin smith very cool kevin smith that's good is it kevin smith behind it yeah it is like it's oh i going to be super excited. Very excited for that.

And he might never meant anything to me before that, by the way. He was a toy. I never saw the cartoons. Oh, I was. I watched the movie, though. I didn't like him. Wait, was that the one? That's where Snarf is really annoying, right?

Is Snarf in He-Man? Is he the little like everybody's like a powerful cat? And then there's an actual cat that hangs out and his name is Snarf. Is that Thundercats? Oh, that's Thundercats. There's a lion-tiger thing in He-Man, isn't there? What's his name?

There's a beast man. No, He-Man is the one where you have the... Is it the Enchantress or something like that? Or the Sorceress. You've got Skeletor and obviously the titular He-Man who's got

the swords. I've got the power of the universe. He-Man was right in Euron Harley's wheelhouse for ages. It was a little before us. It's a little before us, but that just meant that our parents thought it was cool. It ended in 1985. I was born in 1985 i was born

in 1985 86 like my brother was 1977 so he he got down like he got down with with it's really an interesting it's an interesting thing they did uh but there was a cat by the way it was his cat battle cat was like oh he rode the line it's a tiger it was yeah and it uh it it and it was a tiger. It was a tiger. And it was a cat that turned into it. So what they did with He-Man is they created these toys. And they were like, all right, make us a bunch of cool-ass toys. All right, so I guess this is like, this is fucking He-Man. He's a big fucking dude with a sword. All right, keep going with that.

This is like Skeletor. He's the bad guy. All right, keep going with that. This is like Skeletor? He's the bad guy. All right, give me more. Give me like 20 more. And they just did. And then they're like, all right, now let's make a show about those toys you just made so we can sell those fucking toys.

They made the toys, then the show. And part of the thing with the show, I think it was in the movie even. Because it was PG-13 or PG or whatever, Dolph Lundgren couldn't use his sword as an offensive weapon. Dolph Lundgren? Yeah, Dolph Lundgren.

I was shocked that it was Dolph Lundgren. Why Ninja Turtles can't use their weapons either in the cartoon. You can't use your weapons as weapons. They could be there, but they would jump on the guys or hit them with the shells but yeah you didn't get to use the weapon yeah were you guys too too uh old for power rangers or no no i'm perfect for power rangers i watched season one episode one come out like like that was like when i was like first grade i think it is when that came out

i'm guessing power rangers came out in it would have been it was 1993 to 1996 they had their first run i didn't see it until like 96 and i was like i'm a 91 so i was no yeah i watched that shit come out like i didn't like it when they started making the later seasons and they started replacing all the characters because when i watched it it was like the first iteration right you had zordon but you know why that happened that's because the show uh saban was going out of business and they didn't have money to produce a full show so they bought a japanese show a japanese like hero group show and they filmed all the kid parts out of costume. Really? Like two locations.

And then when they morphed, they cut to Japanese footage. And when they go on the big monsters, they cut to the Japanese footage. Power Rangers was so popular that it was so much more popular than that Japanese show had ever been. And that Japanese show existed for like three seasons. So when Power Rangers was still bumping and this show was done, show had ever been and that japanese show existed for like three seasons so when power rangers was

still bumping and this show was done they didn't have any more episodes so that's why they came up with like power rangers turbo that's a completely different japanese show completely different from the power rangers we know but they call it power rangers but now they have to recast everyone and rebrand it and somehow make power rangers fit into this new hero show and that's why there's like 80 different types of power rangers shows because the first iterations were all japanese shows that previously did you see the movie so the reason that like like when you i remember watching the show and you would see all the characters like with the english-speaking voices and then they would go into like Megazord or whatever it was.

And even though they were just in a field, it shows the animation, and now they're standing by a bluff somewhere. No, no, no. Not just that. Whenever they're in costume, I think in fighting, it's the Japanese show. All fighting is the Japanese show. So that's why the scenes didn't make any sense in that show because it would be totally different uh outside environments they had like two or three putties to mess with the humans yeah and then the choreography was really simple and then it goes to like the japanese one and there's those sparks explosions and they're doing double flips

and shit off trampolines they had choreographers and it was way different for the japanese show you know when um with the american version uh who played one of the monsters who's like you know when they're fighting like the uh the tentacle monsters like the people in the obvious mascot costume looking things are gigantic like when they have to go into the mega droid or whatever um brian cranston that was one of his early jobs was he was in some fucking goofball costume like fighting the Megadroid or something like that, bashing like cardboard cities. That was like Van Damme was almost the Predator.

Yeah, he did a lot of on-screen stuff as the Predator and in that hot pink colored insect costume that they had at the time. And he was really upset because he thought his face was going to be seen. pink colored insect costume that they had at the time. And, uh, um, he was really upset because he thought his face was going to be seen. Like he thought that the predator was going to have his face. And, uh,

he, and he, he, you know, he wants to be a star. He's Van Damme. And, uh,

and, and, and like, he ended up quitting off the, off the set or, or getting fired, whichever, whichever take you want to believe the,

the production ofator is hilarious. Everybody got food poisoning except for Arnold because he had his own food sent down because he was on his ridiculous diet. And he had this huge commercial gym shipped down. So him and the other dudes like Carl Weathers and Jesse Ventura are all pumping iron continuously when they're not on screen. And he let it slip.

He did this weird thing. I can't remember exactly how he did it but like the bicep thing with jesse ventura he had someone sort of like mentioned to jesse that like jesse your arms are bigger than arnold's like like and and like how big are your arms jesse and jesse was like whatever they are like ah they're they're 21 inches or 22 inches. And they're like, oh, you got Arnold blown out of the water. You should challenge him to a bicep measuring contest. You'll embarrass him because you know part of the production deal is none of us get to go shirtless, only him, because he doesn't want us to look bigger than him.

And that is a thing. Nobody but Arnold is allowed to show their arms off. I work with would look they wouldn't give me his height they wouldn't tell us his height of course not he's five he's about five eleven and a half or something so so like whenever um jesse ventura like right away early in the movie he gets blasted in the arm by like a regular small arms like gunshot and it's when he's like i ain't got time to bleed that's so they can wrap his arm in bandages so you don't get to see his bicep in the movie so anyway he does go to arnold he's like yeah we should have a bicep measuring contest and i was like yeah yeah we should and of course they get out the fucking measuring tape and arnold's got like 26 inch biceps or whatever the fuck he's got

and just makes jesse look like a piece of shit in front of everybody. He's 22. I was lied to about the girth of my biceps. Just humiliates me. Even Jesse Ventura is fucking huge in that movie. A mountain of a man. Carl Weathers is enormous in that movie. They all are. Everybody

except for Shane Black is just a monster. Did you like the Predator, the Shane Black one? The remake is awful. God damn it. They don't know what the fuck he's doing. I know. Every character will be like a one-note caricature

of a human being. How about that? That'll be cool, right? We'll have a guy who's got Tourette's Syndrome, but he only says funny shit right no you're wasting a good act that had a movie ending that they're like little after credit scene I was like don't have a scene here after that movie like this is anything weird yeah there was just yeah that that movie was hilarious though that's a good movie to get scared to and watch you know kyle you need to fix it i can't hear you sorry predator is one of the best movies ever predator 2 is is pretty good especially if you're a dan the world building of predator 2 i like i did i like that scene at the end where they hand him

that fucking um that that blunderbuss or that like black powder pistol and it's got like i don't know some guy's name and like a date that's like 1791 on it or something like that to like indicate that they've been coming to earth for like hundreds of years and whenever a human bests the predator he gets a trophy like like he's he's won like like like in this fair combat like they had this honor code this honor system the the predators are that species is called the yautja and like they have this whole like honor system that they live by that's what the movie should be about there's so many good stories from the comics I like to rely like that part about it. There's this there's a good story about how like

They there has been created like this if they want to do like an alien versus predator movie the storyline they should have done Should have been about there's a situation where like this human scientist creates an alien predator hybrid and and the Yautja get wind of it and they view it as an abomination. So they put together like this, like a team of predators to like go kill this hybrid predator queen on this planet. And so there's humans, predators and aliens on this planet. And so there's humans, predators and aliens on this planet. Instead, they did that awful shit where they go under the ground in Antarctica into the into the upside down pyramid ziggurat. It doesn't make a lot of sense.

And then they did that sequel to that where they're like in small town America or some shit. And it's so dark you can't see anything. And I think it's rated PG-13. Every almost all those movies have just been awful. And then they did the one called Predators where they had the I liked it the one with Adrian Brody right yeah that's because Adrian Brody's leading the team

with that big old shard he's actually a Jew but he's got the big ass he's got the Jew nose and he's doing his best Batman impression because Adrian Brody's a tough guy they got some good AA-12 moments in there. They did. They had some cool ideas.

Good guns. Listen, it was not memorable, really. By the way, this link, best part of Predator 2, if you want to put that full screen, I think you can put a full screen. You think we can watch Predator 2 on YouTube and not get copyright match? Oh, it's been snort solid cocaine?

Yeah, it are. Yeah. Have you ever, have you guys ever heard of it? Aztec death whistle before? Yeah. Yeah. It's lame. What? I've heard of it the first time ever. I heard the noise on a video. So it might be lame. I have no idea. And I saw

it and I was like, this is so crazy. Why is it so lame? I was coming in here like it was fucking sick. I know how cool that it can sound at its best, but I think in reality it doesn't live up to that. Did you hear him on Real Life? I think I have one, yeah. There was this thing I did on,

when I, so here's what happens. I'm live streaming on Twitch all the time. People would donate like two or $3 and I'd say, thank you. Or maybe answer a question. Other people would donate $25. And I wanted to distinguish that donation from the tiny one.

So I had different things. I had a little electric note thing I could play where I had a little lamb. The gong turned out to be the big hit. I bought like a 26 inch gong. But I also bought an Aztec death whistle, a Jew harp and some other things. And the death whistle, it barely made noise. It just sounded like, it was lame is it possible

that this thing is similar to like a musical instrument and that you weren't hitting it right because I just watched a video of an Aztec death whistle and it sounded pretty like when I see a pretty it's a pretty girl you could probably watch

that one here if you click here's this link also before you click that one you might want this one this one's a pretty girl, we could probably watch that. Yeah, that one over here. If you click, here's this link. Also, before you click that one, you might want this one. This one's a minute and 11 at the middle endpoint. Actually click Kyle's first because it's a girl playing the note. I've seen it. But then this one at a minute and 11 is 100 horses and 100 Aztec death whistles blowing. And so it's like a simulated charge of what it would sound like.

Well, the Aztecs didn't ride horses did they or the spanish invading army would use this so i guess they took the aztec death whistles not really sure the backstory of it but he's the doors but yeah when the conquistadors showed up on the hell on the horses. The natives thought that they were horsemen. They didn't understand that it was two fucking creatures because they'd never seen a horse before. Horses are European. There were no horses in North America or South America. So they see these fucking conquistadors roll up in armor with guns on a horse,

and they think it's a new creature. So, Zach, when you play this, is this Kyle's? Yeah, go to 111. That's where she spends a minute. No, that's my video is 111. So, Zach, when you play this, is this Kyle's? Yeah, go to 1.11. That's where she spends a minute. That's my video is 1.11. I think she plays it pretty quickly. She plays a couple of them. She's got like three different ones.

She's playing a female one. If you're looking for something truly creepy, I bet there's basically bone rattling. You gotta go to 1.. This is boring as fuck. These are death whistles. And they are haunting.

They're scary. That is scary. It's the girl one. The other one. It sounds like a... It's a whistle that doesn't work. It sounds terrifying, Woody.

You have to, again, if there's a pretty girl. The context. You're not supposed to be scared because you know it's a pretty girl on YouTube playing a whistle. Yeah, I'm a little turned on. You're supposed to be in a forest hearing this noise in the distance for the first time in your life and having no idea what it is. Click the link I sent you and go to 111. And not just any forest. You're in a strange new land

on another continent. It's nighttime. You can't see. You don't know what animals are in this forest or what animals exist in the world in general. And you're hearing that. Bro, you believe in demons. You literally believe in demons.

Yeah. Not in the way that Taylor's and people he grew up with believe in demons. The way that people who burn people as witches believe in demons. You would be shitting yourself. That would be so

fucking terrifying. It's already pretty it's a scary noise what demons i'm listening to harley's now with the horses and the oh are you talking about how they use horse noises to sound like an aztec death whistle talking about the aztec death whistle there's links below they're uh they're watching them it's all right all right i you're selling me a little bit. It's scary. I think at this point I'm a little Pavlov dog. I just get turned on by death whistles because of that chick.

But, yeah. How crazy is 100 people and 100 death whistles blowing? It sounds like an army of like 1,000 fucking demons. It's a lot more annoying than just scary. You can go to 130 instead of 111. I just went to it. I went to Kyle's link. It's a different whistle.

That's a female hornbearer, though. That's a different whistle. A female hornbearer. That's what it says there. I don't know the details of it, but yeah. The sound of 100 Aztecs charging towards you as you load your gun and prepare to win the battle. So if you heard this emerging from the darkness.

It's very unique. Very unique. Imagine if I play this instrument in Chicago downtown. You are. You are playing it in Chicago downtown. I mean, see, those death whistles are so scary that the Spaniards just turned and ran. No, they conquered

them pretty quickly. Pretty easily. A hundred conquistadors with horses and blunderbusses. Turns out they're not that ruined by whistles. These guys, they actually dominate. They're warriors, though, to an extent this recent one

right here if you click that that's not that's cops this day and age getting smoked by a death whistle no that's not real that's not real is it i don't know you think someone would lie on the internet there's someone in the comments that they ran away like 60s cartoon characters even if I was a cop I'd be like bro no way man no they like ran the way like Shaggy does where it's like then they ran

what else do you think they could be running from if not that noise I don't know if those are real cops then we just figured out the perfect way to commit crimes the cop is is horrified of the aztec death whistle i can't believe you had one woody it's so funny i was like i'm gonna buy an aztec death whistle now i just don't want to get like some wish Aztec death whistle that sucks I think I got it from Amazon

The Jew harp was tough How do you play a song with one note? I've never even heard of the Jew harp I don't claim this It's called a jaw harp or a Jew harp People told me to buy one for the stream but i've never actually played yeah it's just one note is it can't be like the hot like is it like um it's like a thing like this with a string stretched across it it's not a string it's in the oh there's no wire

it's not a guitar string it's not a wire either it's like they're like hit it like a spring material like a metal spring material and when you flip it it vibrates and just goes and i guess the way you make music is you do it at different paces there you go i don't know if jews harp have anything to do with Judaism or if it's just because they call it a jaw harp too maybe they just got lazy and some people call it G harp or maybe it was a very cheap

musical instrument I think it was I'm not going to buy my nephew a violin my god he's 13 what's he going to do we'll get him a nice harp doing that i'm gonna get this for the next time i stream them

you can't get this you can't get this anymore no one else can get this cultural appropriation if you get my jew harp we have to buy a jaw harp this guy does sandstorm with the jew harp i guess he can't even play it anyways everyone else he plays it well we need like an anglo harp so so we can play this is the best jew harp player i've ever met yeah it's good eh it is just one note but but i like it i better get so much pussy pulling that out at parties. You know what I heard today that I had no idea was so

fucking lit? I was listening to, this is going to sound so stupid and my YouTube recommended it's going to be messed up forever. Home Depot song on repeat for an hour is fucking sick.

The Home Depot song? There's no way you get claimed for that. What is the Home Depot song? Bro, the fucking sickest bop you'll ever come across. I was blown away. Someone told me to play it, and I was listening. I was like, yo, Home Depot has no right going this hard. And all the comments are hilarious.

Someone's like, I'm 45 minutes in and now have four children and a wife. Yeah, there's it really is. It's the Home Depot music, but with a lot of stuff layered on top. No, that's theirs. That's it. This is the Home Depot song. That's what you get you get a banger someone should put this on a speaker and lows i probably love this song for some reason

dude uh you know improving home improvement am i right someone's like i showed this to my dad now he's an american citizen hey what's your favorite song me it's complicated owning a house like i remember being a kid and having to go to home depot with my mom and dad and being like this place fucking sucks there's nothing here i'm allowed to touch or play with because it's all power. All the stuff I want to touch and play with, I'm not allowed to because it's power tools. It was awful. I hated it.

The light section. It's too big of a building as a little kid. So when you walk in there with your mom or dad, you're like, I'm going to be here for eons. And it always does take forever. And then after buying a house a couple years ago, the first few times I walk in, I'm like, I get it. Okay okay this is fun i don't know these are things i like i can oh a fire pit okay well that one sucks oh i can build my own fire pit you say okay with all the tools here

all right i'm i'm putting the pieces together i get why people like this what do you must actually because you're so handy you must like walk in there and just be like seeing projects to do right at some point you need a pickup truck to bring that shit home right i used to rent the home depot truck every weekend you know how else am i gonna get plywood i don't afford focus i need a new circular saw or something and i well not the table saw, for example. A band saw. You get your Home Depot. Then you get a pickup truck so you can bring that shit home every weekend.

Do you ever see yourself circling back around to woodworking as a hobby? Or do you think that's kind of in the ledgers now? I probably would have already if it was easier to air condition in the stable. It's just Northolina is rough for outdoor stuff like that you gotta catch up on everything you gotta woodwork on twitch you gotta do everything that you've been sleeping on you gotta bring it all back together

do it all on twitch do it all at the same time think about it woodworking i imagine is something that's like cathartic like you're just like focused in on it and you're doing it not necessarily wanting to explain or i don't know that's the way i am with like i get people all the time like when are you gonna stream yourself working out when are you gonna stream yourself lifting and it's like all once my basement's fixed i'll do a twitch stream taylor murk on twitch i'll do a twitch stream like showing my gym but i'm not gonna to film myself working out, that's me time that's like, that's my

get the angst out time Taylor, don't you think you'd like working out with 500 people giving you shit? No, that's a big part of why because, yeah, I guarantee I would like finish a set of Incline Bench or something and be like, man, that was a good one

I kept it extra tight for the Twitch boys and then i'd go over there and it'd be like fucking retard doesn't even know how to lift he put it down it's like you'll simultaneously get you'll get a weight being like people being like too light of weight and also too heavy weight you'll never hit hit there it'll never be good it'll always be too much. That's it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Especially on working out, if there's any activity that almost half of men in existence feel the need to comment on, it's how other people exercise. I was doing a work. I was curling.

I had my thumbs out, my thumbs in. I don't even remember my buddy might want to put your thumbs out i'm like why so you're hitting your back too much right now i'm like that's okay okay well that's fine harley you do not want to activate those back muscles on everyone has a a a comment what a fucking asshole correcting the only thing the only thing that i've ever made a comment on because i don't go to people and like say something is if i see someone doing something really fucked up in the gym that could hurt them on three occasions i've gone up to someone and i've really been like oh that looks like an interesting uh exercise what muscle is

it working and every time that i've approached these people they don't know they don't know what to point out i'm like oh i'm like because it looks cool but if you don't know which muscle you're working out you shouldn't do it and that's my like low-key way of not trying to be like you know but trying to come over like i'm asking yeah because i'm curious like i want to learn from you and then i like I'm I think we learned a lesson together here Discount the fact that Harley's fucking six foot seven I would never like I'll go over to some people and I'm like I wouldn't want a guy like if you're gonna come and give me advice like if someone's gonna come and say something I better

Look at you and be like Damn, take your shirt off do a little spin for me okay what did you say again all right i'm listening i like when you're at a gym and you like you see that like body of the guy who is not cut at all and just big like just like looks fat and then you see him go like just warm up deadlift with 715 on there and it's like the heart attack boys this guy the heart attack boys yeah you got like massive muscle you're pushing mad weight your face is red and like you just there's no sign that there's even strong muscles in there that's where i aspire to be yeah i want to i want the body of a much fatter juggernaut who can just run at a wall just like that guy in x-men i remember watching x-men movie and being like dude juggernaut is

the coolest that guy rules his only power is running through things and like it doesn't seem like he can turn direction very well so largely useless. He's also got a magic helmet. What does that give him? I think it gives him invincibility. Oh, shit. He can't die? Well, that's a tremendous power. Yeah, he's invincible with the helmet on, too, I think. Only with the helmet on, though. He has virtually infinite kinetic energy when he's running. It's

magical powers, though. He's not a mutant. Well, he's pretty cool, is what I mean. That was a pretty cool power. Is he a D-list? He's not a mutant. Well, he's pretty cool, is what I mean. That was a pretty cool power. Is he a D-list? He's a bad guy. He's been in two movies, so it's tough to call him a D-list. He's a bad guy in the X-Men comics. He's depending on which iteration.

He's a X-Men with tax. Yeah, depending on which iteration you're going by. In the cartoons, he was uh professor xavier's um step brother half brother or something yeah half brother step brother something like that brother of professor x his half bro what kind of relationship was his dad having that guy looked like 40 years younger than professor professor x well that's just cast a bald head wait so wait you guys um never read comics right but do you like those movies where time repeats itself like i happen to love like that tom cruise movie oh yeah yeah yeah i like i liked uh

happy happy death day and happy death day to you uh there's a new like netflix movie i think of that it's got like mel gibson and then but he mel gibson's not the star he's more of like a side character the main character's like this jacked dude where every morning he wakes up in his bed next to the woman he fucked the night before and immediately he's like people are gonna try to assassinate me right now because i've seen this movie and at first i figured out how to escape my bedroom before getting shot down. With the helicopter. Yeah, with the helicopter right outside. I saw this movie.

It was sick. I liked it. For the life of me, I can't remember it, but I remember watching it. I put it on as like a bullshit whatever movie, and by like 10 minutes in, I'm like, all right, I'm in. I'm into this. Yeah, yeah. I love that. It was super, super cool. And then every day, he gets to repeat repeat himself and so he can learn things throughout

will sasso's in it he's like the bodyguard of the guy of mel gibson at the end he was the big guy for mad tv that does that hilarious arm i know will sasso yeah i missed him i didn't notice will sasso yes he's brief it's brief he has like one line but yeah he's hilarious yeah there's there's an x-men comic called House of X, Powers of X, and it's just like a super interesting take on it. It's Moira McTaggart who has relationships with Professor X. In this story, she's a mutant, and the way her power is is the mutant X-Men life goes through,

as we all know it, exactly how we've, if you've ever read the comics, how it is, except when she dies, she's born again on her initial birthday. Time has reset, but she has retained all her information. She goes through life a different way and tries it again. And like, it kind of ends badly again. She's born again. So she goes to professor X and finds him early. And she's like, read my mind. And professor X is like, whoa. so now he has the information of her two lifetimes and his two lifetimes and then so they could advance technology through mutants in her lifetime and then she dies and she's born again and she goes back to professor x and he

reads her mind he's like oh shit we have a lot of work to do and it's more and more and it gets to this like super perfect mutant future where professor x and magneto are like boys and professor x has like cerberus permanently on his head and he's got this crazy suit he could obviously walk because he could avoid his accident and everything like that and it's how like mutants don't rule the world but they're separate from the humans and they have their own perfect society where they know the future because professor x has lived it so many times and it's like they're on attempt like 1000 or timeline 1000 but it was really sick and there's like really some crazy uh mutants in it but house of x powers of x i know you guys won't but sometimes i say shit like maybe an audience i'll probably watch like film comics explained like do

a thing on it like i like those yeah that'll. Yeah. That'll be perfect. Look that up. That guy's sick. That movie we were talking about. It's called a boss level and it's on Hulu. That's right. Yeah. Level on Hulu. And it is actually entertaining than you think it'll be. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It is. I was astounded watching it where I'm like, has it been an action sequence for 40 minutes straight? Wow. It has. It's good though. though it was good it was pretty good yeah it has like fun little dialogue in the middle of it and he has to stop at different areas like literally oh i won't give anything away uh boss level on hulu it's a very entertaining movie just just just a popcorn movie just i might check that out because

i've been watching american horror story like every day and it's really taking a toll on me like like like like spiritually and emotionally what did you think of the second season with the insane asylum that i haven't seen that one yet uh so the three seasons i've watched this week are roanoke uh the coven which is the witch one obviously and i'm almost finished with freak show but they just like forcibly like mutilated this girl's face and i was getting kind of nauseous so i uh i i i went and watched like some star trek to like cleanse my power i like i i watch it until i get sick to my stomach and like like not like grossed out but just kind of like disturbed a bit just disturbed and it's like it's it's like take it's like if you watched like enough gore videos on live leak after a while

you're just starting to get numb to how horrific every episode is it's so fucking rough man and and this shit is on fx it's so rough i i was i was telling people in the discord i was like hey i'm watching american horror horror story if anyone wants to like watch with me i'm why i'm on i'm on roanoke and i think class started watching he he met he i think he's uh he was stoned and he like messaged me he's like i'm 10 minutes in i'm just disturbed i don't like this and i and like i messaged him today i'm like hey do you He's like, I tried, but it was just too much. I can't deal with this. It's just,

it's just awful for the sake of being awful. Is it that scary? I haven't seen the season. It's just that it's awful. Like the things that happen are so awful. Like, like people are getting disemboweled and burned alive slowly and like tortured endlessly.

And, and like everybody's dying and, and everybody's lives are so miserable and sad and awful. It's fucking terrible. Are you finished with all the seasons you began at this point? Like you're pretty much ready to start a new one. Uh, I'm at the end of the Freak Show one, and I don't know if I'm going back.

I don't know if I'm going to go back. I think that's the one that happened. I think that's the season right after the season two, which is the Insane Asylum one, and I think that's where I stopped watching because I just lost interest it was like oh this guy's he's named lobster man and he's got like two welded together long fingers on his hand and he uses it to finger fuck women it was like well that's not scary and so i it got worse there was there there was like a killer clown and like all

the freaks are just kind of hard to look at after a while and like ah their backstories were just gruesome and horrific it's a lot to take in man is it as scary as oz it makes me feel the way oz used to make me feel yeah yeah and it wasn't that i'm afraid of anything in oz it's just that like i'm tired of showing people yeah the prison i'm tired of seeing people suffer. I'm tired of seeing the suffering. It's just so much suffering. The Roanoke season was pretty good. I like the premise, the way they did it. What's the bad guy in that one?

There's like eight bad guys in that one. Serial killers? Because they all have a theme. Yeah. The freak show, the serial killers, the insane. There's this lost colony of Roanoke in north carolina um nobody knows what really what happened to it and uh and basically like this like couple goes and like buys a house in the woods and weird shit starts happening and what's actually happened here is that um

there's like eight things going on so So like, like first, like some Druid priestess snuck over with some, some Spaniards or some shit in like the 1500s. And then like went into the woods with her forest God shit. And then she like influenced a Kathy Bates character who was part of the Roanoke colony and made her like do human sacrifice. And then there's two sisters in the 70s who were like murdering their nursing home patients for fun and then there's like a slave owner who was uh who was like brutally murdered and uh but he's a ghost yeah they're all ghosts but three nights a year they

get to like inhabit the earth and like fuck with people and and kathy bates is like the butcher and she wants to sacrifice people horrifically to the land and so she's disemboweling them she'll like put pig heads on them while they're naked and then roast them alive um she'll disembowel them slowly she like cuts them open and like puts a meat hook in and is like slowly drawing their intestines out. Do you like Kathy? I love Kathy. I love a good actress. I fucking love Kathy Bates. Ever since I watched misery for the first time and she made me feel so much

like anticipation and fear watching it where I'm like, this is just a guy sitting in a room, like not writing the book that she wants. And like, I have like my heart's beating quickly because I'm also anticipating the madness she's going to burst into the room with when she's not pleased with the ending. She's so good at being like a horrific piece of shit. Like in the witch season, she is like a slave owner who like for shits and giggles, just because she's bored, has a torture chamber in her attic where she is just torturing all of these black

men to death. One of them, she just stuffs shit in his mouth and then sews his lips shut. Or she'll just slowly cut their pancreases out and use it for her beauty cream. She'll sew bullheads onto

them to make them into minotaurs. Or just cut them apart slowly because she likes the way they scream. Yeah, she's a really good actress, and she's good at playing the spooky character. I like her. Have you guys ever heard of a complete – well, not completely. It's a recommendation. Have you guys heard of Racer Trash ever?

Racer Trash? Racer Trash. It's a thing on twitch it's like a collective of editors and stuff they have a twitch racer x trash but they take movies um and uh they kind of like make them vapor wave and edit them like special like they had one you've got mail but it was called you've got nails and it was all like vapor waved with like Trent Reznor music or nine inch nails music, or they'll take like super, uh, super, uh, vapor wave bros. And it's the Mario bros movie, but they like reedit it. It looks like you're watching it on a burnt VHS. And it's like these

really crazy things. They only exist on Twitch when they air them and then they disappear, but they're really good. like i feel like i should shout them out because i feel like some people i don't think the younger audience will like them but people around my age will like them um 35 uh i it's like a good vibe it's like really sick the work they put in they're like funny interesting kind of like a chill vibe like if you got blazed and just watch the i just went to their site. Dude, the vaporwave aesthetic is tight. I like that.

Yeah, their whole site is really cool. I was looking at that earlier, too. I had never seen it. But yeah, their movies are just crazy. If you did go to their Twitch and turned on notifications, you would know when one goes live. And I'm always happy when I catch them. They're such a trip. They're really just such a weird, trippy thing thing but you won't be able to see anything um because they take it down

because it's like not theirs it's not their content you know speaking like weird ass content like did you guys ever get into tim and eric back in the day? Big time. Big time. Have you watched Kyle? You never watched Tim and Eric on a day on cinema. Oh dude. Tim and Eric is great. I loved old Tim and Eric, but there's a new series on Hulu. I think it is not new, but Tim and Eric bedtime stories.

No, I don't know. It is like genuinely like upsetting some of the stuff. Like it, it's so weird weird it's so uncomfortable it's so upsetting one of them is like like this like you know eric the tall guy is the neighbor and tim comes over and is like trying to get him to come to his like his super bowl party or whatever and it's like yeah so i'll see you there you'll be at my super bowl party he's like you're

uh you know i just moved in with my family i'm not sure he's like yeah yeah, so I'll see you there. You'll be at my Super Bowl party. He's like, you know, I just moved in with my family. I'm not sure. He's like, yeah, yeah. You'll be there. And then this guy starts leaving dead animals on his lawn and digs... It's fucked. It's really fucked up, but in that really funny Tim and Eric way. I'm excited to check that out. Tim and Eric bedtime

stories. They're so funny. They're so funny, they kill me. Yeah, I love Tim and Eric. And I watched all of decker if you did you watch decker i didn't watch decker no oh that's tim like heidecker and he's like decker like a super agent guy like there's one scene it's like the plane gets hijacked by a terrorist and it's like this guy comes on and like you know like a stereotypical caricature of a terrorist and he's like hi my name is abdul i've hijacked your plane so the whole show is so ridiculous and it's always upsetting like i used to watch funny stuff i loved laughing funny movies whatever scary movies but

then you get to this point where like scary doesn't scare me hereditary spooked me but like funny like what i'm gonna watch a whole movie and laugh like four times maybe uh if i go on tiktok tiktok is at the point where i'm getting such fucking mutants on my for you page that i will laugh at that but like it's rare that i get emotions watching these movies or tv shows or whatever. That's when I fell into cringe content. Obviously people like watching cringe content. Most people do.

Some people, whatever. I watch it and I cringe and I liked it because I cringe like it would hurt me. And I felt something. I was like, good. I feel something. But then I watched so much cringe that I've bypassed fringe. Now I like mad content content like someone like doing something no like someone trying to do like uh like like something like uh like uh like a 27 year old

like pretty boy doing like a 16 year old girl's tick tock dance like wearing like the worst outfit was like with like a long dangling earring or something and like or just even like a like a 23 year old like uh like giving like life advice and wisdom about something where you're like man you don't know shit but they're playing the influencer game you're watching someone maybe they want to become like uh they want to be like a youtuber or something or if you watch like a family vlog and someone's telling you what they do with their kid on how they do it and like i don't know shit but i hate what you're talking about like shut the fuck up or like or a rapper with like an intense political message that's like, how much does the Illuminati control behind the

scenes that we ain't aware about? And I'm listening. I'm like, shut the fuck up. That's pretty funny, though. I like this content now where I watch that stuff and I'm like, bro, this guy's got to shut the I'll watch someone fake holding a glass of wine, doing this long apology

about it. And I'm'm like put the fucking wine down for a second and then shut up and like i'm like hate watching like people's content i know it sounds ridiculous but it's one place where i can find like an emotion watching something and i'll watch my friends like why are we even watching this sucks i'm like i know right tons of people it fucking sucks wasting our time make it louder bro dude tons of people hate watch stuff i just don't like that i don't like watching stuff that makes me mad that's where i'm at that's where i got i graduated it wasn't just like something came on and i'm bothered by it or i'm like turning like i go out and i'm like i like putting on something i'm like but can you stop was like, look at this fucking idiot right here. Look at this person. Like, look what they're

doing. And it's funny enough is just statistically thousands of people have done that to me with my content. Just statistically, that's how it works out. But I'm saying like, I see some stuff where I'm like, bro, this guy's such a fucking loser. And never go and comment i'll never go and write oh you're a fucking loser i'll never send the message but i do i do appreciate them for existing so i could pull up their car and my friends hate it i'm like bro no why are we gonna listen why are we gonna listen to this dumb bitch and i'm like bro it's not even that we're listening to a dumb bitch i'm listening to a dumb bitch talk about another dumb bitch like that's how deep i am in this shit dude if i if i watch that i mastered content i mastered

content like funny stuff cringe do you do you add stuff i'm like horror stuff i'm past it all i need i want to watch something if i'm not playing a game well like if i'm gonna be here i better feel something and you guys youtube ain't made me laugh in a long time so let's let's fucking bring out the hate then if you like that i never i never would bully someone or message or do anything like that i think that of course not you're a stand-up gentleman but like well no you're watching sorry to interrupt real quick if someone bullies no continue monologue i fuck them up i will hold a look let me let me grab the mic here for a sec if someone messes you have on something and be like oh you're a stupid jew i'll go to their dms and i'll be like is that so you really think that

hey you fucking loser no you should you should go in there and be like i'm a smart jew and here's why it's just kidding no i'll even feed into it i'll be like you're like, I'm a smart Jew, and here's why. Just kidding. No, I'll even feed into it. I'll be like, you're damn right I'm a stupid Jew. You're right, I'm a stupid Jew. Does that bother you? Don't say that about yourself. Is that bothering you right now?

Don't you – when you watch content like that – I get suggested a ton of hockey content on YouTube because I watch reviews of games, highlight stuff. The hockey guy. Shout out the hockey guy on YouTube. Love that guy. Like super, super unbiased,

but like, I'll see a video of it, not from him, but I'll see videos suggested to me where it's like, why the St. Louis blues in 2019 didn't deserve to beat the Boston Bruins. And I'll like, see that.

And I'll be like, if I watch this, I know, I know the rest of my day will be, I'll be showering tonight and I'll be like, if I watch this, I know the rest of my day will be, I'll be showering tonight and I'll be like, and another reason that they deserve to win. Like I, I, I. That's different. That's like, if I watch something where someone's like, uh, this is why star Wars has never been good. Or this is why star Wars is a piece of shit.

I would be like, yeah, I don't think so, buddy. I mean, like I'm watching weird content. I would be like, yeah, I don't think so, buddy. I mean, like I'm watching weird content. Like I said, like I'm watching someone be like, like, like an apology, like a perfect thing is like an influencer's apology on YouTube. I'll like, hey, watch that for a second and be like, you fucking insincere liar. You're not sorry about shit. Yeah.

Every time I see. Yeah. When you see an apology video, it's like, first of all, never apologize. All you're doing is, all you're doing, no one's going to go, guys, he apologized. Stop, get off his back. They're going to go, he apologized. Admission of guilt.

Hammer him three times as hard now. Like, that's the way it's going to go. Sometimes you apologize if you want to control the narrative. Sometimes that's the game. We'll be like, I want to get ahead of the game and apologize about this. And people are like, damn, we didn't even know we should get mad about that. But he already apologized. We've been disarmed beforehand.

I don't think you ever win in the modern day by apologizing, especially if it's like a specious in the middle thing. Yeah, things get crazy. Things get carried away. Do you give a fuck at all about your Montreal? I say Montreal. I was going to bring that up. Your Montreal Canadians.

They are an OT right now. And they can put it away. And we can go to the Stanley Cup tonight. I am so excited. I've never done this before. But I was refreshing while we were on podcast. I'm team Habs. Habs all the way.

Please, please beat those Vegas cocksuckers. They haven't been in the league long enough to deserve a Stanley Cup. No, they can't have one. No, thank you. Yeah, it'd be great. It'd be great. That would be awesome. I saw all the festivities.

Montreal is exploding just in the name of this bar. If they win this, it will be fucking crazy. And obviously, if they go to the Stanley Cup, it'll be fucking crazy. The city's insane. When it comes to hockey, like, bro, people will tip over cop cars here for, like, regular season wins. Yeah. It's not a special event.

Like, people will go crazy. And that's, like, I actually just go on Instagram and, like, click on people's live Instagrams after games, and I'll see what's going on. But, yeah, it's tied to, too. That'd be pretty cool. You know what would be awesome? What would be great is if Brendan

Gallagher got the OT goal. I like him a lot. He's my favorite player on the... I know very little hockey. There was a McDonald's burger named after him here. There's a McDonald's burger named after Brendan Gallagher? Yeah, there was. Is there one named after carrie price they're they're this was this was the this was two years ago or so

he was still there but no there was no uh burger yeah i don't know what kind of deal he got with mcdonald's quebec or whatever but yeah that'd be pretty cool i'd be happy if that i'd listen i'd be happy enough that i have it open and i refreshed it. I'm not a sports guy at all. And I, you know why, what you were describing already is I was looking at this and I was like, kind of like, Oh,

I'm going to be annoyed if they don't win. Like, I don't give a fuck about hockey and I will be annoyed if they don't win. I don't give a fuck about hockey. I'll be annoyed if they don't win. So someone like yourself, when you were describing it, that's the type of anger I would always try and avoid.

Cause my brother's a huge Broncos fan fan and he loves them and he used yeah he used to obsess over them yeah you know like like this is like you know we talked like 15 years ago they're winning super bowls and shit and like he would love that he was all about it but like he would get mad when they lost in the playoffs or things like that and i was always looking at that like oh that ain't worth it. I don't want to be mad every other Sunday. It's not a thing I need in my life. I used to be mad about sports until the blues won the Stanley cup. And now every time they lose out,

it's like, ha ha. You can't take it away. We got one. We got one. Yeah. Yeah. Even Montreal and Toronto was like a very exciting.

Cause obviously they did take it away. What if they did take it away? What if they found out that you guys were stealing plays or something? Steroids. Steroids wouldn't do it, I don't think. Everyone's on steroids. But if they had literally done some criminal shit, like they had broken into facilities and filmed their opponents' practices. Some Patriot shit. They had broken into facilities and filmed their opponents' practices. Basically what the Astros did.

Some Patriot shit. Dude, there would be a literal march on Boston. A march. We're going to destroy Boston! People here were so excited. You remember the old shit? Oh, they stole signs. Okay, I see here.

The Astros. It was originally a – Let me tell you what the Astros did. I can break it down in like five seconds. Let me tell you what the Astros did. No, I'm kidding. I don't know at all. They had cameras. They had a guy out in the crowd with like binoculars or a telescope or some shit,

and he's looking all the way up there reading the signs. He knows what pitch is coming, so he's relaying that by radio to the dugout, which is where the players hang out. I don't know if you know baseball. A guy in the dugout would hit a trash can with a bat, and one hit meant fastballball two minute two minute breaking ball he's giving the batters the pitchers that are coming based on a fucking code and you can and because it's that kind of code where a guy's just hitting a trash can you can go back and watch the games

and watch them actively cheat it's all recorded what happened Did they get in trouble? No. That is cheaterly. No, but the issue here says it's been part of the game and it's not against the rules. The part that is against the rules is technology to do so. That's bullshit.

It is weird. For a runner on second base to look past the pitcher, see the sign, and to signal the batter. That's all part of the game. Montreal Canadiens win the series with a three-year third goal. They eliminate the Golden Knights in six games.

Fuck you, Vegas. You haven't been in the league long enough yet to win a cup. Let's go, Montreal. Yeah, I like hockey now. Fuck you. Who's your favorite player? Gallagher. league long enough yet to win a cup let's go montreal i like hockey now fuck you who are your favorite who's your favorite player gallagher he had a hamburger at mcdonald's that's awesome that's fucking i saw i saw i'm gonna be lurking on dude r slash hockey is gonna be a bonanza tonight i can't wait to go see all i had. It's great. Yeah, and you know what sucks about rslash

hockey? They used to be quick. Every single highlight was there. Now they're like fucking posting tweets of like insider info that has no backing where it's like, Jack Eichel is going to be traded to blah, blah, blah, and that gets 2,000 upvotes. It's like, that

was some retard saying that online. Post the highlights. Post the goals. Post the saves. That's what everyone's here for. I don't care about your commentary. Sorry. My buddy just sent me this. Real quick. Just...

Looking at me. I'm seeing you. Looking at me. That's awesome. Oh, man. I'm so psyched. I'm so psyched the canadians won that series the canadians will be the first team in nhl history to go to the stanley cup playoffs with a less than 500 record in the regular season wow they magically less than 500 record mean what does that mean it means that so like the golden knights record for example in in the regular season, they won 40 games, they lost 14,

and they lost two in overtime. The Montreal Canadiens won 24, lost 21, and lost 11 in overtime. So they were 24 and 32 overall. And Carey Price, their goalie, just decided in the playoffs, like, yeah, I'm going to win a Stanley Cup. And he's just been and if you don't know, Woody, Carey Price, he's not some rookie bullshit.

He's an established elite goaltender. Did he play for the Hurricanes for a decade? What's that, Woody? Did he ever play for the Hurricanes? No, his entire career has been for the Habs. Okay. 500, Harley?

It's a percentage with an extra number. So if they're under 500, they lost more than 50% of their game. Yeah. Why would they do that? They literally – Because of the weird COVID divisions, there has never been a team with a lower record than the Montreal Canadiens making it into the postseason.

And now they're going to the Stanley Cup. That rules. That's awesome. I did see Vegas Knights game in Vegas. I've caught a couple hockey games before. Watching a game in Vegas was interesting. It was fun. They did too much

Vegas slash Cirque de salatia there because people are like it's got to be a show i guess for people they can go anywhere are they gonna go see a game and they try hard there was like three rolexes given away to someone in the crowd like tons of cash giveaways under the seats they did this weird pageantry they had like a giant castle with like cheerleaders dancing in it and it had quite a bit of pageantry it was pretty loud there too because everyone's a stranger no one really cares about the truth specifically but i like that yeah vegas made the stanley cup their first year and even as a first year team they had like better

pre-game shows because it's vegas and they know how to put on a show. It's cool. And their competition for other things for people to do in Vegas at night. Wrap it up? Yeah. Everyone can find you at HarleyPlays on Twitch

now. Yeah, twitch.tv slash HarleyPlays. I'm always going to be streaming with Taylor Merka, so for sure, come check me out i'm always going to be streaming with uh taylor murka so for sure come check me out you're going to see him there if you want to see him he'll for sure be there all the time i know you guys love taylor so go to twitch.tv slash harley plays you'll probably see taylor there big green play there i like it and what he's going to be woodworking for sure on harley's channel i'm going with kyle check me out on kyle's channel we're going to Kyle check me out on Kyle's channel we're gonna be taking mad edibles and going skydiving and learning how to use as why handers

yeah you're all yeah thanks for having me by the way I like being here every time love it PK 549