Painkiller Already - PKA 568 w/Filthy Robot - Jail Souvenirs, Twitch Leaks, Dune

Episode Date: November 6, 2021

pka 568 with our guest filthy taylor this episode of pka brought to you by feels cbd lucy and lock and load as always we'll hear more about these tremendous products later these awesome products kyle's still out in the woods somewhere and filthy are you injured no more than normal no more than normal oh i dude i feel you what happened to your wrist uh nothing no no unique event it's just uh repetitive stuff from just all the time and i was really i had no stream it was a dangerous masturbation incident you know a bit of i caught my arm in some machinery right at the wrong moment it's horrendous there's nothing like coming on a lathe but it's high risk that's right

high risk high reward you made. High risk, high reward. If you made it out of this time. So you're getting this just from streaming? You're streaming so much that you're like carpal tunneling? Yeah, but I feel like I had this last time. Maybe I don't often wear it on this one. It's just it's been worse recently. So it's kind of like I'm on the computer all like typing and stuff.

I just want it on. It just feels better. How many hours a week do you stream? 40-ish roughly. All all right so you're working i think that's more than most full-time streamers what do you think am i on target there i don't know it depends you talk to destiny he says he aims for seven days a week 10 hours a day he's towards the high end yeah he does that i don't know if landmark used to be way up there too but it seems like he's also down to like a more reasonable pace, like 40 hours a week. I don't know how,

how streamers who just play one game do that. Like it seems, and you know, I have an ingrained bias against those open, like rust because it's just too much, but Tarkov like 24 seven, your whole open, like rust because it's just too much. But Tarkov, like 24, seven, your whole life,

like waking up knowing like, what am I going to be doing on December 18th? Tarkov. What am I? What about 2024? Tarkov? It's even worse though. If something like league,

because league has been there forever and we'll be there forever. So then it's like your future and your past are just this one straight fucking flat plane. It's the same fucking game which i don't get i never played it i i can see why someone be a one person streamer one game streamer i i totally get how they do that because you know i watch you for this this is what i like about you you're amazing at this i'm not here to watch you be mediocre at fall guys that is not at all what i like to watch i'm here for this show

put on this show for me forever and if you try to diversify to expand your audience you might not want to go through those going growing pains and you might not even succeed right yeah for sure there's a real chance that the only thing interesting you is interesting about you is the way you do this one thing right that's possible i like how they do it he does it yeah yeah but i i've said many times everyone who works in social media sells their mental health for cash that's just like the nature of the gig when you just stream one game oh you are selling a lot of mental health. Like that is rough to play Tarkov and nothing else every day for that many hours a day.

They're all hating the game, trying not to admit that. Yeah. That's how I always feel when I talk to anyone who does that one game full time, I'm always like, you sure you're not a little bored of it? Cause I get bored of games really rapidly and drives me nuts when i have to

do that for any length of time i fake well really poorly so like by the time i'm done with the game i'm like fucking done with the game like anything a viewer says that irritates me when i'm playing a game i don't want to play they'll be like how's that game i'm like fuck you where were you yesterday i already talked about this you know like every question you know how as a streamer you feel a million of the same question again and again. Yeah, I'm tolerant of that. Oh, I'm not. And the more I hate the game, the more I'm hating what I'm doing,

like the less tolerant I am of it or like the worse the game's going. I don't watch gaming streams like ever because I don't really game a lot. But when I've popped in a couple of times to fill these, and this is well over a year ago at this point, you were playing some game and the way you seem to do it is you play a game, like you said, so much nonstop all day every day for like two months that you are just sick of it. And someone commented, maybe it was like Hearthstone or something, I don't know.

They were like, dude, total misplay. You should have played The Wizard after the Aladdin activator. And you're like, oh yeah? Yeah? Maybe, do you want to fire up your stream and then you can show us how it's done? Do you want to show us? Do you want to do that? And I'm like, oh, he's not even Maybe do you want to fire up your stream and then you can show us how it's done? Do you want to show us? Do you want to do that? And I'm like, oh, he's not even memeing. He's clearly very upset.

And then I went to your rules and it was like, so many people's rules are like, don't be racist. Don't be shitty. Yours is like, don't you ever question my decision in a game. Don't give me your fucking uneducated, bullshit, dumbass, tuned in for one second

like opinion on my goddamn stream i had this i was talking about this stream the other day and this is this is a one of these moments where you just suddenly realize what you're doing for a living i had a viewer some some months ago now uh who asked me a question so i responded to it and then he said i didn't have you i had you muted what did you say and i'm just like are you fucking kidding me at what level of interaction is that all right you know imagine you walk up to a guy and you're like hey hey hey i know you're doing something i got a quick question for you and you're like okay what's your question and he asked the question you respond he's like oh can you say that again i really wasn't listening i didn't even bother to listen after asking you

directly a question i have a complaint on the other side as a viewer as it's not about you in particular but um people have text to speech on text to speech incentivizes donations like crazy so something will happen in game or maybe there's a conversation happening in general between the entire chat and the streamer back and forth and i'm like oh i got a line this is fucking gold this is comedy gold boys i'm gonna pay three dollars for everyone to hear this joke and then if the streamer talks over my joke you asshole i want my three dollars back that was three dollars you think i just toss around three dollars like it's nothing no i'm performing in front of an audience here you're like charging back and re-donating the same three dollars until the joke gets through

i watch a starcraft streamer artosis right who's a pretty big starcraft streamer and um and he has the same kind of deal that like a rain had had in his streams which is his interaction with his chat is at least in part toxic so a large portion of his text-to-speech donations are people trolling him and they'll like some of them read like erotica, like, you know, a cartoon erotica, like stuff that reads out. And it's like, and at some point, like you can see he'll tolerate for a while and then he'll like put a stop to it and move on kind of deal because he gets so many of those. And you're right.

It's farming it for cash on some level. It's kind of funny, but another level you talk about that, that trade of mental health for this, you're literally listening to someone send the shittiest thing they can possibly get through your filters and have it read out loud in front of all your viewers and you and you're just like smiling and it's for like two bucks. I got that so much. I got a foot pedal. You have a foot pedal?

I have a foot pedal that's hot keyed to cancel the text to speech mid-sentence. So I just play it and whatever like the second I hear like a child's name or oftentimes I can see it before the words get read out. And if I just scan it, fuck that. Nope, we're killing it.

This one's stopping now. Yeah, toxicity and text-to-speech, that's just part of the game. The repeated questions, that's the job to me. If you can train the internet not to repeat questions, wowsers, I can't do that. I just accept that that's the job to me like it if you can train the internet not to repeat questions wowsers i can't do that i just accept that that's what yeah that's never bothered me you guys are made of sterner stuff than me like imagine that you just spend like especially if it's like you know imagine if it's something like that's clearly it's like 15 minutes of like you know you've just gone over

this in depth you're like oh let me really brush let me walk through this, especially like take like a magic play, right? You have some like complicated situation. It's not immediately apparent what the right answer is. You're working through it, thinking through it. You explain it. You go back. You're like, there's a couple lines here. Maybe I do this one, this one, this one.

The next guy's like, why didn't you do that? It was the same thing. You just fucking explain. You're like 10 minutes deep. You're like, well, if I repeat this four more times, I guess the stream will be over. You know, it's't at some point. Have you ever seen Zoolander? Oh, yeah.

There's that scene where Zoolander is talking to David Duchovny's character and David Duchovny lays out the whole plot of the movie. Why these people are using male models as assassins and how it's this big scheme and he lays it out there, you know, the the nitty

gritty and zoolander goes ah so why are they using male models are you serious i just spent two minutes explaining that that was in the media recently kyle that was um what did they call it not ad hoc what is it what's it called for um when they pull it out too yeah yeah yeah david just uh just he forgot his lines came yeah he just came forgot his line they said that and for when they pull it out. Yeah, David Duchovny just, just, he forgot his lines. Yeah, he did.

He forgot his line. They said that and they kept it because it's one of the funniest parts of the movie. So, well, no, Ben Stiller forgot his line and then David Duchovny made up the line. Are you serious? I just spent,

I just explained that to you. Exactly why we just went over this. Yeah. That's one of those things that gets posted on Reddit like every six weeks and then goes to the front page. Like if you you if you just wanted to farm karma like i'm sure there's 30 or 40 guys who do nothing but that but you just post that same shit over and over it's about time for someone to start posting uh the tunguska uh event information again like like but what about steve buscemi being on there on 9-11 yeah what if i want to learn that again i need a picture of him in his firefighter gear or i can't believe it oh wait there it is was he a retired

firefighter that went back to 9-11 to help out believe it or not yes yeah that's a good one too you're right it is the same like fun facts all over the internet lost me now mind you i still go there every single day for too much time but i hate it now i'm not interested i i hate scroll through reddit i'm every bit of it is yeah i it's the guys who are too liberal for me which is unbelievable to some of our audience but it's like what is this fucking twisted one-sided look at this issue i i look you could be liberal but don't be like a fucking misinforming propaganda liberal like that that i don't like um or it's the the repeats or i don't know i just can't find it interesting anymore so it'll be good if you go to like small community like like since i've gotten into archery the last few months i'll go to the one

that's about archery and there's nothing there other than archery or guys like form check and then they're like shooting in the backyard and some guy with the label like expert archer will be like your your this arm was incorrect and i'm watching it like yeah that arm was incorrect idiot that was a catch and release child you can't just pump him full of arrows watching hooligans do wheelies through urban environments is one of my favorite things about reddit at this point is it i've mentioned calamari race team before uh basically a squid is someone who is irresponsible on their motorcycle and the calamari race team is uh you know a bunch of squids out there taking videos of themselves misbehaving and i'm here for it man i can't do it i'm not i suck at wheelies compared to these guys but i want to see it and then uh the squid marks which is basically scars or maybe exterior uh

things that hold your bones together during the repair um the ink marks the scars they've got all these terms for it that fit i calamari race team fucking love it i never missed i have to stay away from that one because i'm riding a motorcycle now and that scares me and if i'm going to be if i'm going to have any confidence at all when i ride i cannot be looking at fucking calamari race team or whatever the fuck and i can't be looking at meat crayon or i'm going to continuously be putting around at 45 miles an hour it inspires me i'm like what do you have to get better at misbehaving oh no no it's all i think is like that could be you it could be it very well could be the person that's getting a meat crayon there they thought they were on top of the world that morning when they stepped out onto their bike.

I'm so cool. The worst. The worst. And I say that, but this is like, if I ever see somebody wreck the same bike I ride, that'll hit home. That'll hit home. I don't know why.

I don't know why it matters. But like, oh, that's literally exactly what it would look like if that happened to me. Okay. So you certainly wouldn't want to see like people photoshopping your body onto a bike that you might drive all over the PKA Reddit, for example. You fall off and it tears off all of your hard-worked muscles. Your ginger cuts. Oh, my God. Then we're just like, oh, you got to restart, man.

You ripped off your biceps. That quad's gone. Yeah. I don't like that stuff. Um, I still like everybody keeps complaining that there's no more porn on Reddit and I don't understand what they mean by that. People complain there's not enough porn on the internet.

The front page filtered out the porn. Of course, all the subreddits are still there. Okay. But even if they get 40,000 votes, they won't show up on the front page okay so help me because i don't understand then because when i'm on reddit right now and i click all i get okay um i don't but is your all are you logged in no

zach says it doesn't show porn on ios Yeah, I do it on just a browser on Chrome. Oh, you don't use an app? No. Oh, you're on your phone? Yeah. Oh, maybe Android's the one place where you still show porn? No, my typical ready experience is my computer. I don't know.

When I scroll through it, it's like, I don't know. I see porn. And I like having porn mixed in with my tech news. It's been six weeks. It's time to hear about how this actor cut his hand and kept acting. And then watch a guy repair his refrigerator in a very unique way. And then the guy who made a robot that paints murals. And then I take a nap.

I don't get porn every once in a while, like a risque female cosplayer will slip through, which is pretty porny. You know, she might be topless. But for the most part, I'm not getting porn like I used to. That's a damn shame. That's a damn shame. Well, there's the multi reddit that I have up i i it's there if you want it you just need to ask for isn't there a thing called scroller that like um like like somehow like boils reddit down to

like it like like uh various topics or something like that i think i've seen that i don't know sounds interesting i don't know i haven't i haven't lost uh interest in reddit um like like like taylor was saying whenever i'm like into something specifically i find that reddit and it's like you get that show me what you got moment where you go top all time and you're like yeah these are the top best all time fucking i don't know some i was for a, I was obsessed with... Female cosplayers. Yeah, female cosplayers. Ooh, I bet there's some good stuff over there on female cosplay. Subreddit's top all time. Go check it out, guys.

Let me know. But when you're the, like, when you are going to, like, a niche subreddit like that, and you do the top all time, like, for Archery, because that's one I've been going to a lot recently, like, you go into it like, I'm going to get into this. I'm going to be, like, super into it. I'm going to have so much you go into it like i'm gonna get into this i'm gonna be like super into i'm gonna have so much fun getting into it and then like i bought like 130 dollar you know takedown recurve bow and then like i see all of these like like the upper echelon of elite among

the archers with like that meme like family guy where meg is like you all think you're better than me and it's like the the takedown. And then like all the natural, traditional Mongolian hunting bows and the long, the British bows. And it's like, so I'm not even cool enough for these guys. And then they have like debates there. And they're like, there's no reason to be divisive in the archery community. Let's just all agree that you suck if you use a crossbow. And they're like, you're right. We were wrong to be so divisive.

Just like such a stupid little community. Something else I stumbled across recently. And so there's one called Glitch in the Matrix. That's just like silly little things that happen where like deja vu or like I was walking into the store and this mom with her two kids wearing the same coats walked in. And then as I was leaving leaving the same family came in again it was crazy it felt like i was losing my mind and people were like that's wild like that happened crazy when things like yeah did it so i'm on the tat right i'm in lincoln nebraska on my way home transamerica trail was this big motorcycle ride around the country and i'm riding my bike in

lincoln nebraska A guy rides his bicycle in the opposite direction. He's very distinctive. He has a big beard that would make Santa Claus emasculated. He's skinny and he's on like a beach cruiser bicycle with an oversized basket on the front. There's not a lot of people like this, right? And he's pedaling along in his shorts and like a tank top t-shirt and he's old. So's a big gray beard and then three blocks later another guy just like him same bike same beard same everything i'm like hey that can't be that can't be i'm going like 35 miles an hour that bicycle guy didn't whip around glitching the matrix out i can't explain it i don't have an explanation but that's what happened yeah then and like it's because like

the comments in that one i was reading a few of them they'll be like it's crazy how how you can convince yourself things like that happen and someone will be like you know don't ask too many questions about it you know and someone's like well we're allowed to say this is just silly happenstance it's not retconned and i was like retconned that's a new r slash retconned what is this so i go to that one and this one is like glitch in the matrix but you're not allowed to say that it's just like happenstance it's like and a lot of people are clearly taking it seriously number one they are obsessed with the berenstein bears what does retcon mean again i feel like it means that like you retroactively change something to make it fit with modern day. So they some of them will say like, you know, it was the Berenstain Bears with EIN at the end when I was a kid.

And now in this new dimension I'm in, when I when I phased, now it's Berenstain Bears, AI in at the end. These are the Disney singing bears. Correct. Yeah. And they'll use that as an example of it. And people will be like, yeah, it's pretty creepy. So, Woody, so that in particular is this thing that there is a lot of contention about. Like there is an enormous group of people who believe that it was spelled a certain way. There's a lot of these.

Yeah. What are they called? Mandela effect. Yeah, Mandela effect. Yeah. Yeah. It's just like people mass misremembering something this one here i'll link it so you can look at the comments too

it's a it's a picture of an egyptian uh statue and it says this image was taken in 1856 and the comments are like unironically yeah just show the image though you don't show the thread uh it's just unironically people saying like you know in my old reality photographs weren't even a thing until the 1910s and other people are like i swear every year it gets earlier soon we're going to be seeing pictures of the middle ages you know and they're like yeah in my old someone there was some other comment with like there's a lot of people talking about their old what do they say realities or the timeline that's what they say they say on my old timeline it was baron steen bears and in my old timeline actually uh building seven didn't even fall down but in this timeline it did and it's like people just misremembering shit and everyone around them going like that's so true it it's crazy 1856

somehow feels early to me it's earlier than i would have thought pictures were but there are lots of pictures of lincoln not paintings pictures of abraham lincoln and he was murdered in 1864 i think i just looked at 65 i think you're right it is 65 um so clearly like this is there were pictures around back then that one looks color am I crazy yeah and so like this has been improved with like modern technology and so that's number one kind of stupid like obviously it wasn't you know this crisp back then yeah this one looks great but one of the yeah this is the exact comment I was thinking of in my old timeline photography took off in the early 1900s. Anything before then was super grainy,

and there were certainly no photographs from the 1850s. A clear anchor memory for me is in the movie The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly. The wanted posters of the criminals were all sketches in my old timeline. Now they're photos. Now, is it more likely, I posit, that he's misremembering, or that he's shifted timelines yet again? we didn't do class that day. We just watched 9-11 and I have no memory of that. And, uh, and I am positive that that is because I was 15 years old watching, watching TV and it was a

national tragedy happening. And that's why I don't remember. My memory in particular is flawless and better than video evidence. Yeah. In my old timeline, you were a gun YouTuber. That was a sick line. In my old timeline, your head got stuck and you didn't make it. I'm about to make my first YouTube video, but I'm hit by a car. No, Lefty's still here. We have 400 viewers. I don't know why.

This show sucks. I don't know why I'm listening to this. In my other timeline, it was good. Jackie left after Woody turned to the drink. Yeah, that would be fun. In a timeline out there woody's a drunk just i don't like alcohol at all i love it i know but that's i know that's why i took all of the lack of desire and that one was left with nothing but thirst he got my share yeah there's other ones

where it's just pictures of animals that they're not familiar with and they'll be like oh really and it's like like one of them was like did you know that animals uh can can absorb sunlight and create chlorophyll now because look at this slug it can absorb sunlight from the sun and it's an animal do you remember this in your old timeline it's like we discover new animals all the time like it's it's definitely not a timeline shift but it was it's super fucking fascinating like staring deep what would be interesting i so so that so that all that nonsense is only interesting to me if you put like one drop of science into the bullshit if you got black science man to be like theoretically there are multiple universes and some would by their very nature be unstable because only minor changes separated them from their sister universes, let's just call them.

So it's possible that those universes could merge back together and you could be from that sister universe. And you could be the only survivor who remembers the Berenstain Bears spelled the wrong way. It could be. We need Neil deGrasse Tyson to weigh in on this. But I just recalled seeing this. So don't look anything else on this. What do you remember from the Fruit of the Loom logo? Like, just describe it to me.

Okay. There's a dude wearing grapes dude wearing apple and a pear maybe the the logo itself that says yeah the loom and then what's behind it oh no idea isn't there like a loom i'm thinking a bunch of fruit a loom with a bunch of fruit in it i mean all right so i'll tell you what I pictured immediately. Because the more I think about it, the more it dissolves. And I can't picture it anymore. I have no idea what it is, Taylor.

But were you perhaps expecting they might even be close to it? Were you thinking they might have overlapped slightly with what it actually was? Kyle, finish what you were saying about what you initially thought. Honestly, I pictured a cornucopia full of fruit, like one of those Thanksgiving centerpieces. Yeah, that's not right. And see, that was one that I clicked on it, and they were like, there's never been a cornucopia behind the Fruit of the Loom logo. And I was like, that can't be true. There is a cornucopia behind it

like that one i was like that's surprising because if you would have asked me before i saw it it's like yeah there's that cornucopia and it's full of fruit and and that's what their logo was but no it's just a bunch of people misremembering a corporate logo all right all right so this one is like that right well no because this one is actually freaking me out a little bit because like he found an instance of this that i was completely unaware of right i i literally he went don't look anything up and i put my hands up because i'm sitting really far from a cheap ass laptop and a fucking rental so like i'm like yeah go ahead let's play the game and he's like all right tell me what and i'm like i pictured the cornucopia with the fruit in it and and it's not like cornucopia is a word that's in my daily like vocabulary it's not like i'm steeped in cornucopias over here i've never seen a corporate cornucopia in real life

yeah but you waste the fucking time right like how many things don't you remember clearly like if you think about it just in general like how much of your childhood do you not remember how much i couldn't even tell you i don't remember i know right like for everything so it's only like when you point it out for some weird piece of trivia like yeah that's so weird that that's totally different than i remember then you're like well how many i don't remember on the whole no no you're you're you're you're you're misremembering something that happened 30 seconds ago. It's not that I was confused about. I don't even know who you are. It's not that I was confused about what the Fruit of the Loom logo was.

It's that I'm confused in the identical way that apparently many, many other people, including Woody, are confused in. We all imagined a cornucopia in that logo. Why is that? And just it's just a bizarre it's not like i pictured a cornucopia and what he was like i thought donald duck was on there and like and you know you're you're like i i thought it was a soviet sickling hammer like we're not all picturing different things it's all just the same thing we're remembering but incorrect like i also i saw one where they're like the monopoly man doesn't have a monocle anymore and i was like but what really and for some reason i also thought i

remembered a monocle being on that you know why you know why i got the answer to that one that's interesting what is it different game right mr peanut he stole it. Mr. Peanut. Are you thinking of the Hamburglar? He's kind of the thief. No, I'm not thinking of the Hamburglar. Are they owned by the same company? No. Pull up a picture of Mr. Peanut for me. I want you to look at him.

And I think you'll find that were Mr. Peanut a man and not indeed an intelligent man-sized peanut, he would indeed look exactly like the Monopoly man. Mr. Peanut, I wish Zach were pulling up Mr. Peanut right now. He's just working on it. Mr. Peanut. Oh, man.

He's always had Mr. Peanut. Oh, man. He's always had a monocle. I can honestly say I was not expecting this topic. You didn't come prep for this one? I wasn't either. We just kind of do whatever we're thinking. Now, clearly this fancy Peanut is out for a black tie affair. But because he is a Peanut, he is unclothed. But obviously, black

pants are implied. He's wearing those fancy gloves, the black sleeves, the monocle, the top hat and cane. This is the Monopoly man. Undeniable proof, I think, of a different timeline. No, of course not.

People are confusing the two. Well, yeah course not. People are confusing the two. Well, yeah, of course people are confusing the two, but it is... In my old timeline, Mr. Peanut had a jacket on. Did he? In my timeline, yeah, sure. Yeah, I mean, I bet he'd look good in one. Give him some shoulders.

A little bit of shapeliness to him. But yeah, it was the fruit of the... I mean, the Monopoly monocle one was like I was like, yeah, I don't really remember much either way. I would believe you. Let me... I'd love for you to ask us and then us answer. Yeah, let me...

We need some X-Files music over like this as we do this too. Yeah, that'd be perfect. Okay, where is it? Here it is. Okay. I'm deep for a rewatch on the X-Files. So how do you spell the Berenstain Bears? I guess we did that one.

Oh yeah. I forget who has a W. You're just bullying me at this point. All right. So does Curious George have a tail or does he not yes he has a tail incorrect curious george does not have a tail holy shit wow that's not a monkey no don't go to the next one till i or no you i guess uh man you can just do it without a tail is blowing my mind

zach you can open this this is the same article i'm looking at and i guess you can just do it without a tail is blowing my mind. Zach, you can open this. This is the same article I'm looking at, and I guess you can go through them and see which one we think it is. This one is, is it sex in the city or sex and the city? Oh, I always thought it was in. I feel like I'm going to get it wrong,

aren't I? I think it's actually sex and the city is the name of the series because the right one seems to be the correct one in these. Febreze. How do you spell Febreze? Can I do this one? Yeah. Okay.

F-E-B-R-E-E-Z-E. No, it's always only had one E. F-E-B-R-E-Z-E. Wait, what are the first three letters again f e b oh i already got it wrong did i do it there goes the like group misremembered what is group misremembered the spelling of 80% of the words in English. It's flowing in my mind. Woody spells things

completely differently than we do in our universe. That's right. Did you see his handwriting? He draws the letters differently too. Alright. Fruit Loops. Do you remember how Fruit Loops is spelled, Kyle? I think it's...

Oh, no. Is it F-R-O-O-T? Oh. Yeah, that's the right one. Some people apparently think it was Fruit U-I-T, but I've always remembered Fruit with like Fruit. Because I thought

it's like, oh, because it's not real fruit. Yeah, the one on the left looks wrong. It does to me now, too. That one doesn't look right. The other one's some King Henry VIII turkey leg. I don't know what that is. The monocle. Pikachu's tail. None of you guys would know that.

Pikachu does have a tail. No, he does. It was a matter of... Is it shaped like a lightning bolt? It he does it was a matter of it was is it shaped like a does it have like shaped like a lightning bolt it was if it had a dark patch on the end of it or if it was all yellow it's a dark patch uh that's what i thought also but apparently it was all yellow okay well we're from the same universe there yeah we're from the same timeline wait explain that's why you do this together oh does Chick-fil-A have a K in it?

It's the one on top. I think it's, yeah, I don't think they have a K in it. I think so too, am I right? I think it's the one on top. My timeline is the top one. My timeline is also the top one. Oh yeah, Fruit of the Looms in there. Have we exhausted this topic?

Yeah, I'm done. I think we go forever. Oh, I'm done. Let's name go forever. Oh, I'm done. Let's name the states. I have a topic that I had queued up to ask the chat. Are you guys ready for this? Yes. All right.

So buckle in. It's going to require about maybe a whole minute of reading. Oh, dear. I got it. Okay. This is from the true off my chest subreddit. I don't know why I called you the chat. Six years ago, I switched my wife's cat with a

more well-behaved lookalike. So six years ago, I swapped my then girlfriend, now wife's cat with a more well-behaved lookalike. She had an all black cat that was extremely aggressive. It scratched everyone, hissed at everyone and didn't use its litter box half the time. My wife insisted that we could get it to behave better. One week, she went out of town to visit her family and I was supposed to go to her apartment and feed it. The first night I went over, it scratched the shit out of my arm. I joked to the cat that it is

not special and I'll replace it if it scratches me again. The joke stuck with me until I had thought about it enough that it wasn't a joke. The next morning, I went to the local animal shelter, found an identical cat that was already litter box trained and acclimated to people, but was a little skittish.

The old owner died of a heart attack, and the animal shelter people said they think that's why it was skittish. But overall, it was a lot friendlier and better behaved, and the skittishness would help it resemble the original cat. So I adopted it and took it to my wife's apartment, friendlier and better behaved and the skittishness would help it resemble the original cat so i adopted it and took it to my wife's apartment settled it in and then drove her original cat to an animal shelter a town over it's been six years since then and we got married four years ago we still have the swapped cat it answers to the original cat's name and my wife knows nothing

she loves this cat and brags about how much better behaved it is now. Every time I see it, I feel like a total piece of shit. And the comments were all like, the top one changed. But it was like, do not tell her this. Your whole life has been a lie. You are an awful, terrible person. They were just like ripping the shit out of this guy for swapping the cat and i'm like no he did everyone in this story a favor not the original

cat oh fuck that cat he you reap what you sow kitty fucker that cat's been dead for five years in 11 and a half months there was an it where he said he took it to a no kill shelter but it i prefer to believe it was a kill shelter because cats that are assholes should be killed this guy this guy is the cool guy fucking weak this this story acting like his wife should leave him over this oh no it wasn't a dog i feel bad for the original camera. That's because we're dog people. I know. It's because we're dog people. I'll say this. My mom, so my dad had a Weimaraner.

This is when I was around four or five years old. He had a Weimaraner named Sam. Beautiful dog. I still to this day appreciate Weimaraners. If I get a dog, it's on my top list. And because my mom felt that she was the one who always had to take care of this dog and she was tired of that when my dad was away she drove the dog off to like a dirt road and abandoned it and left it there and my dad never found it again Didn't he leave your mom like twice? I hope this was one of the

reasons. That's horrible. That's so much worse than the cat thing. The worst part is I was with her when she drove Sam away and he chased the car for a while. And you did nothing. Oh my god. I was four.

You didn't even try. You should have opened the door, rolled out the side movie style and cuddled the dog. And then Sam and I would have gone on like a Disney adventure, like traveling through the wilderness to get home to dad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Homeward bound. Homeward bound. No, this story needs to be like Odiella, right?

It needs to be like your mom saw you looking up there and it's like kyle you want to fix this hand you that gun and like tells you like you can let it starve out here or you can put it down yourself then it's like a movie twist and you're like put sam back in the car no bitch are you reacting to the storyline i believe it and i start driving and it becomes like a thelma and louise situation where Sam and I have stolen mom's car and we're running from the police. Any of those would have been better. If you had a goldfish, I could swap it for a goldfish that's just like it. If you had a dog, no way.

Dogs are uniquely identifiable. But cats, especially if they're gone for a week, meh. Yeah, I think it's because we're we're dog people I'm like not into cats at all like if it's a cute cat I'll pet it and everything and I'll like have fun like with it sitting in my lap but I wouldn't

want to like own one and I remember my girlfriend had this friend my ex-girlfriend had this friend and her apartment just smelled like cat piss all the fucking time and I know I know how that sort of thing works I bet this girl had no idea her apartment just smelled like cat piss all the fucking time. And I know how that sort of thing works. I bet this girl had no idea her apartment smelled. She didn't know.

And me and my girl would walk in there. And it was like a punch in the face. I remember looking at her and being like, why didn't you warn me? Why didn't you warn me that it's that bad? Because it was that ammonia cat piss smell and it wouldn't be so as bad as that is the cat was a motherfucker like it bit me like like and look i i'm not i'm a guest at someone's home i'm not antagonizing their pet okay this is this isn't when i was eight years old i didn't kick a. I'm 27 years old or something like that. Like, oh, I see you have a rather large orange cat.

What a friendly fellow you were. I didn't know you had a cat. I thought you were just cleaning with eight gallons of ammonia. And so, like, I go to pet fucking cats. Maybe some ammonia perfume. Do you wash your laundry with ammonia by chance? I thought you were distilling ammonia in the back. I thought were ammonia distributors or something do you make smoke bomb do you make stink bombs here like i don't know what it is so like i go to pet her fucking cat and it bit me

and like i don't think i bled and if i did bleed it was one of those bullshit things where like you just kind of like rub. But like, dude, your animal just bit me. What the fuck? How did this happen? When you said you tried to befriend the cat, I'm like, that's totally the Kyle I know. Kyle has befriended every animal we've ever had.

That's what he does. I like animals. People do that and most dogs won't attack you for it. But cats can be... I've been to one friend's house ever who had cats and it didn't smell bad one ever every other person in my life the second second you step in you're like there's a cat here it's unpleasant it's offensive i don't like it i have a little sympathy for him too because like a dog can pee on the carpet once and you you clean the carpet

i guess so that you can convince yourself it's clean like you got an out whatever um but that doesn't it's not a lifetime permanent mistake something about cat urine and that ammonia like it it is a much tougher task to have a cat yeah a cat smell than a dog without a dog smell i'll never have dogs again without like hardwood floors because they're going to piss on that fucking carpet at some point. I'm not good at training dogs. Or throw up. Or take that crazy emergency shit

three inches away from the hardwood. I'm like, why did you stand on the hardwood to get a good footing so you could shit on the carpet for a second? He's just looking at me like, I'm so sorry.

He's looking at me the same way I would look at you if I had shat in your living room. That's what's so great about a dog. Pile in the kennel. A cat could shit in your mouth and it would look at you with disdain like yeah eat it eat it i don't want to smell it anymore do i hope it makes you sick hope it makes you sick i've done when a dog like does something bad and even if it's as mundane as

tearing up a magazine in the living room when you get back you're like hey what what what have you done and i love when like i see these videos especially the dogs online when they can't even look at the owner they're just like they're so ashamed they're so ashamed like a like probably a year and a half ago now that my wife accidentally bought cat food and was like for my two dogs and she was like well they they seem to love it they're there i gave some to them and they love it before i realized it was cat food so we'll just feed them through this and i'm like yeah they love it it's cat food it's nothing but protein like this is gonna be way too much and they're they're like five month old puppies i didn't know that how do you know that how do you know because uh because cats are carnivores so it's a much higher

protein content than omnivores getting dogs so it's like it messes with their their tummy a bit and they're still puppies and like i guess adult cat food looks the same as like puppy food in the in the amounts they are and she got up and went to work and i woke up at like a couple hours later just to one of my dogs doing that thing where he's like snuggling next to you but in a way where he's like i need support i need help like i don't feel good and i was like oh and i felt teddy's mouth and it's all wet it's met with wet yellow stuff that's not good and i i hear fozzy out there and i go out there and i i shit you not not. It was like an angry text I sent to my wife later that day.

Like, don't ever feed these dogs cat food again. Because it was like a Monty Python sketch of the dogs walking around and Teddy would shit himself on the carpet. And I would go to start cleaning that up and Fozzie would vomit on the carpet. And the whole time I'm picking them up and moving them onto the hardwood. And then at one point, I remember explicitly, as I'm cleaning up, I have pictures. I have to find the pictures on my phone because at one point, it looked like that post scene

in Saving Private Ryan, like all the little bombs and everything on D-Day. There were six shits and five vomits all at the same time. And they're doing it faster than I can clean it up. And I watched Teddy. He's like shaky because he's vomited so much. And he walks over between my kitchen hardwood and my carpet, my living room. And he makes it all the way, like Kyle said.

And he goes, right onto the carpet again. It's just at this point, they vomited up everything. It's just yellow foam. I've already picked up all like the semi-solid ones. It was an absolute nightmare. I've never seen... At that time combined, they were 26 pounds. Why couldn't you put them outside?

They did a lot of it before I noticed when I got out there. But I thought that each time they were doing it, they were going to be done. And at this time, the right side fence of my backyard was like was being replaced because it was rotted out and they could climb through it and so if i was going out there with them for many months until they got replaced correctly i had to like keep an eye on them or they would try and run away and so i couldn't snatch them up anyway yeah shame on you fool me twice shame on me where does fool me six times are your dogs are your dogs my wife asked to buy dogs again and i always come down on that side that no that sounds like a fucking

terrible idea and make a story like that that does but that was one day and they brought a very net joy to my life i like and they like they're old enough now like they cleaning up vomit makes you happy it sounds like well it was it. The problem is you've got puppies. My next dog is going to be... I do this occasionally. I go through these phases with everything. If I somehow late end up on the animal

rescue website in my area and start looking at these fucking rescue dogs... You know how if you look up animal rescue website in my area and start looking at these fucking rescue dogs. And they all have like, you know, have you look up, look up a recipe online. They'll give you this whole fucking spiel that you don't want to hear. You just want,

you don't, you just want ingredients. I'm like, how much tomato sauce? And they're telling me about their fucking uncle, my great grandfather in Tuscany. Yeah. Fuck out of here.

But it's the opposite. When you're shopping for a dog, you want a story. So you're, you're like, I i'm going through them and this one motherfucker this one fucking basset hound has no eyeballs guys oh like i don't mean the dog's blind i mean it doesn't have eyeballs it has fucking holes in its skull it is blind it's definitely blind but there's a difference there's my timeline not having eyeballs means you're blind and and his story was like he's like he's diabetic and incontinent and we just rebuilt his fucking like um hip like like he's looking for his forever home and i was like oh that's

gonna take two months yeah oh it's gonna take a long time to train him that's part of it that's two months he'll be dead oh yeah are we certain rebuilding him was the right humane move i love it i i mean if it's not painful anymore i i like it it like i don't want a blind dog though i don't want a handicapped dog like like i was talking i had the same conversation today it's so weird i was like uh you know i told somebody i don't i don't want a handicapped pet because they make me feel bad like especially those little dogs with the fucking wheelchairs oh yeah those are so oh my god and like like if i watch one of those videos where like there's been a chihuahua dragging its fucking hind legs for for like six months and then they hook it up

with this badass little wheelchair and you can see its little face light up when now it can keep up with the other dogs and like now it's one of the pack again instead of like this little thing that had to crawl around and just cry all the time and And then I saw the thing that sparked this conversation, though, was a cat with no front legs. And so it just hops around like a kangaroo. Oh, that's kind of novel. And I was like, I'm glad we're on the same page because I was like, you know what?

I don't want a cat with four legs anyway. But a mini kangaroo. I would take a carnivorous kangaroo though. Can you attach a pouch to this cat? I mean, put a little backpack on that fucker. What's he going to do? Front pack. Oh, he doesn't have arms to hold it on

though. Yeah. That's the crux of it. That's why he's walking on You got to give him a fanny pack and put it in the front so it can be a little rue oh i like that fanny pack on a two-legged cat hopping around fucking great idea do it i can he can carry my joints arrest the cat take him away i want to be the universal they do it's gotta be so bad for that cat like long term like the damage it does to its like structure

like hopping around like that like how old is it before it like you know like the legs aren't working anymore you're like i got my cat hopping around with my wheels on the front i got my hat popping around with my drugs and a fanny pack and the cops show up but it's a black cat so they take him in and anyway they beat him up and take him away i mean we've all seen the videos of dogs or of cops like for no reason just killing dogs when they go for like that's true yeah they love killing dogs that's the thing and sometimes like it'll be like i've seen clips where it's like okay that that pitbull would have destroyed you like it was it was coming to attack you and other ones it's like there's a lab sitting in the yard adjacent to the door and they're like get out here bang bang or i'm gonna shoot your dog again

or the dog is on a chain yeah oh yeah that was a solved problem why did you have to shoot it why did you say you know it's a double solve problem i guess exactly yeah no those guys those guys literally want to like kill something it's very clear and and it happens so often i'm pretty sure they shot the dog at ruby ridge too yeah they shot that was the worst thing they did at ruby ridge that's that's not what i hear yeah but but you know maybe maybe i'd love to see that as a quote next to you like those quote shots where it's got like fdr being like we're gonna take down the fucking nazis we have to fair like one of those kind of quote quotation things under a famous

figure and it's just you black and white like the worst thing that happened at ruby ridge was that dog they shot yeah i like that one i mean that's no they federal agencies and cops or whatever do seem to be very uh trigger happy when it comes to shooting animals though i think they show up and they're like you know ready to do a thing and if there's not a thing to do they're looking for a thing to do they'll create a thing to do yeah there's not a problem to solve yeah make one i'm making this up but it seems like a young cop problem i don't picture a 30-year vet shooting dogs because they're trying to find cool shit to do yeah They're over it. Probably not. Unless they are like the best dog killer on the force.

He was the best. We're not sending out Johnson for this bullshit. We have to keep him in lock for when the dogs come out. Remember that guy who gave the terrible instructions like hands up and start crawling. Hands up, crawl. Hands up, crawl. terrible instructions like hands up and start crawling hands up crawl hands up crawl the guy he killed the guy for not following those terrible instructions oh yeah that guy just wanted to do shit that day for sure what do you think would have happened to that guy if he had just what

do you think would have happened to that guy who was with the terrible instructions if he had just completely frozen do you think there's a point where the cup it would have been a longer range shot i don't know that if the perp froze yeah yeah yeah yeah if he had just instead of following any instructions which because because they were so difficult if he had just been like sir i'm gonna lay here now. What happens next? It's up to you. Please don't kill me. Just lay there.

You decide what you want me to do. I'm right here. Yeah, but the guy was drunk. Yeah. Because I think if that happened to me, not drunk Woody, I'd be like, dude, I feel like crawling and hands up are contradictory instructions. You got to explain this to me.

And the problem was resolved. But that guy was drunk and wasn't able to say things like that and stressed. And they were just that, right? It's the situation. So they're not the other side isn't thinking super clearly either. So that's what I was going for. We're stressed. I've followed police instructions before.

I did it better than him. Yes. Like occasionally. I mean, clearly. Yeah, I don't know, man. I've never been in that situation before. But this one clearly yeah i don't know man i've never been in that situation before but this one it's like nah i've been there i did what i was told i mean they they gave him like the equivalent of those like keeping black people from voting literacy tests like were they literally like it's confusing. I don't think I would have succeeded. Crawl towards me on the ground,

hands behind your back. It's like your head. Now rub your belly. Yeah. And now prepare to die. Tricks on you. I've been doing that this whole time. Yeah,

that's yeah. That was a, nothing ever came to that shooting. Nothing ever came to that. That cop that that cop that cop didn't get into any trial written house trials happening right now i saw a little of it yesterday uh it's kind of just leading off there's some new footage that we've never seen before there's like i think it's ci literally cia drone footage where you can see it from above and um so there's some new information that's coming out during the trial.

I don't know. We'll see. I'm still learning. My opinion hasn't changed too much. It's all down to that first shooting, right? You know, it was an area that was like cleared by the police and sort of,

and written house. area that was like cleared by the police and sort of and Rittenhouse the man is just really passionate about protecting used cars that's I think that's what it comes down to Woody some Americans still care about their communities it's a real cry and shame to see that you're

not amongst them if you wouldn't hold a spear in front of a used toyota dealership you're not even an american when i stand in front of jim chronic toyota i'm ready to die god damn it you want to burn that you want to burn that tacoma burn me first yeah i'm defending this place that would fuck me and try and trick me into getting extra financing. Yeah. They would sell me permaflag. You show up and defend the dealership.

We'll give you 5% off your next purchase. Oh, it's even better than the factory warranty. Let's do ignorant gambling then, which is what I'm going to call this new game, which is where we gamble on what we think will happen

in the Kyle Rittenhouse trial, knowing very little about the situation because I don't want to do any research. That was like years ago now, or two years ago maybe. Yeah, I'm fuzzy on the facts now. So I think he goes free. I think he goes free. I think he's all good.

I think he goes to jail. Perfect bet. You guys are on the opposite sides. How much money are you putting down on this, gentlemen? I don't want to go sissy on this, so I'm going to say $5. I think it's got to be goosed up a little more than that. I'm not going to bet $1 on this. I didn't know that was going to be a joke.

When he said, I don't want to be sissy on this I was like damn are we about to bet $500 on this because I'm not that shit I was like I don't want to bet $500 but I guess I'm not going to back down now well Jesus Christ it's all about the trophy anyway

well I'm not involved so I can amp it up as much as yeah I'll bet 5 bucks how about 5% of your net worth let's not get crazy here this is high risk no how about

$5 and I bet that Kyle Rittenhouse goes free because I caught about I'm not exaggerating, 30 seconds of his defense yesterday or what I took to be his defense. And it seemed pretty good. I'll go this way. I'm going to add a little tie. If he serves less jail time than Kyle, it's a tie if he serves more than I win. So he needs to get a jail, a length a tie if he serves more than I win. He needs to get a length,

a stay that's more than two months. I think if he serves less time than me, I win. Oh, no. You've just increased your thing. I added a tie condition because it was jail or not, and now you're trying to push into my territory.

Oh, yeah. I would say that's five bucks. You have to give Woody odds. and now you're trying to push into my territory. I've got to defend that $5. Yeah, that's right. That's $5. I feel like it's fair. You have to give Woody odds. Because the reason I say that is because... Yeah, now I want odds.

Here's why I say that. Here's why I say that. If you're going to come into my territory. No, no, no, no, no, no. Here's why I say that. Because if he's not guilty on like... I don't even know the charges. But let's say he's not guilty on like, I don't even know the charges, but let's say he's not guilty on like murder,

assault with a deadly weapon, but he's guilty of like negligent discharge of a firearm and they give him like some community service, I think I still win. Community service, sure. But it's about the length of jail time. Was yours 60 or 56 days? I believe it was 58 or 60 days it was one of the other

all right so we'll go to 60 he needs to get sentenced to more than 60 days i win less than 60 days nobody wins zero kyle wins or it may have been exactly 60 days. No, no, no. What it was was I was sentenced to 60 days, but the first day and the last day count. Okay. And so the first day... 58 full days in either the other two. Yeah. So the morning of and the evening of.

For 59 nights. Yeah, because that's how that worked. Because the day I got there, I checked in at 11 a.m. or noon, maybe. I think around noon. The day I left, I think I got out at 10 a.m., 11 a.m., something like that. Zach says three murders and two gun charges. Interesting. Yeah, gun charges, I don't think you typically go to jail for that. We'll see.

It depends on what they are. I didn't realize he killed three. I thought he killed two and had an injury. I thought the same. Hero. I don't know about Hero. We'll see. We're going to find out.

Quite the marksman is undeniable. How many shots did he fire? He fired like five shots and disabled three people. It was really impressive. In a high stress situation he's getting headshots from his ass shooting upwards. People always ask

I think he was getting Yeah, go ahead. Guests. Would you have OJ Simpson as as a guest and it's like of course we would have oj simpson as a guest but this kyle rittenhouse guy seems like fucking plutonium right i don't even think i'd want to talk to him really why not what makes him so untouchable i feel like it's a super controversial uh thing oh no normally yeah i was gonna say yeah but the jizz biz is funny but but shooting black people isn't

did he shoot i don't think he shot any black people i think he shot three white people really yeah when this happened he watched it and. And I remember we watched that clip of him blowing that guy's bicep off, the guy who was coming in with a skateboard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shout his bicep off. Yeah, I don't know. We'll see. But you guys have to remember what side you're in on this

because so many of these bets don't get resolved for like eight months and then no one remembers what side they were on and everyone says they were on the winning side well we've got video evidence right here there's always people to like keep up with this sort of thing for us that's been two years since i've said this but so i'll repeat it again the the next two victims are all about the first one right if the first one was self-defense, then the next two were also right. Then they're just crazy people also coming after him. If the first one was a murder, then the other two people were heroes taking out an active shooter. It's all whether or not the first one was justified.

I thought we all watched it and we're like, yeah, I don't remember even seeing video the first thing, really. But like the second two where there were people trying to attack him, I think we all came down saying like, yeah, he was being attacked. it and we're like yeah i don't remember even seeing video the first thing really but like the second two where there were people trying to attack him i think we all came down saying like yeah he was being attacked he was being attacked but let's say i'm a school shooter right and it's like all right i shot one kid i'll admit that was bad but after that i was just defending myself wasn't he running away and they were yeah same thing with a school shooting like you know like all right so i I killed the first kid and then after that all these teachers came

after me. It's just self-defense. I was a block away and that gym teacher, man, the cardio on that guy. Like whether or not their hero is going for an active shooter or whether or not they're a mob attacking him is based on whether the

first one was justified. Do they get more footage from the CIA drone on the first one? Why have none of us even said anything about the fact that there was a CIA drone present? I bet that's rare. I was like, yeah, I guess

there would be, right? There was like a big planned protest. Rittenhouse wasn't there by happenstance. He had like a medic bag on an ar-15 he wasn't even there for the dealership everything about this guy just screams like winner and and definitely have him a show now and and public servant that's that's what i that's what i'm hearing you're telling me that what do we do we know roughly what time it was i think maybe 10 p.m 11 p.m at night you know it's a it's a nice yeah self-defense hour it's a it's probably a week it we uh a week

night weekend night whatever you know this this young man could be off doing drugs or uh or uh you know harming corollas you know he could be out there roughing harming Corollas. He could be out there roughing up Corollas. Look at that bright young man. He doesn't look dim at all. You know what young Kyle Rittenhouse does

on a, I'm going to make it up, a Tuesday evening? He's out there with his medic bag. Walking the streets trying to help people. And yes, he has a firearm that he's not there with his medic bag okay walking the streets trying to help people and yes he has a firearm that he's not supposed to have sometimes people don't need the medic bag and you know you want to still be able to help well and set the other up nicely yeah he doesn't want to feel obsolete out there. You don't need any bandages? Well, how about now?

He will. Better start running. No, I guess I just don't care anymore. I don't care anymore. I feel like the legal system is not too different than the judging and boxing. I disagree. I don't know what the judgment's going to be, but I do think it will be right.

And the reason I say that is there's so much video. Like when you saw New York Times reconstruct everything, and actually I think it was Ben Shapiro did a really good job on it too, just from the right and the left. They both came to the same sort of conclusion of the order of events and what happened, because there was so much

video, they all put it together and you could see this trial comes along and they add some drone footage which shows an aerial view of like sort of who went to who like they're 60 feet apart one guy went to the other to you know like engage that matters to me that kind of says the thing i wish i remembered with confidence i would have would have said it. I don't remember. That's an important part of it. Yeah. I want to say Rittenhouse, if I'm right, went to the guy he killed to engage him, protect cars, I would say. And then that guy didn't buckle like he expected and chased Rittenhouse, who then shot him.

I believe Rittenhouse was originally offering him some water. Get the fuck out of here. He was right. Rittenhouse, as a trained Eagle Scout and medic, is fully aware. He looked dehydrated. That's the biggest threat. The first threat. Dehydration.

Dehydration. By the light of that Molotov cocktail flying by your head, I could see you looked dehydrated. I can see from across this parking lot. By the light of that Molotov cocktail flying by your head, I could see you look dehydrated. Gentlemen, I noticed that you've been around those dumpster fires all night. You've been yelling a lot.

You're drinking a 40 there. That alcohol is not serving to hydrate you. Would you like some water? And they attacked him. You're going to hydrate one would you would you like some water and they attacked him um you're gonna hydrate one way or the other he was trying to hydrate them and if anyone should get odds it's me because i i think that like the media has already convicted this guy long ago um i you know they were making a big deal when like um company had some of the management or something like that took pictures with Kyle or something like that. Coffee company?

Yeah. Was it Black Rifle Coffee? Might have been. Might have been. That's interesting. I love Richard Ryan, but they're almost MyPillow adjacent in there. Our customers are Republicans, and that's just what we market to.

Here's the thing. Here's the thing. Both teams drink coffee. Both teams drink coffee. They don't both drink Black Rifle coffee. No, they don't. I guess not. We need to start a company called No Rifle Coffee.

What if you're selling coffee? I just don't know why I'm being divisive. Look, I bet they sell a lot of fucking coffee. It just never made sense to me to have a politically divisive coffee brand. And I'm positive that's not what they set out to be. Okay, there is not a company called No Rifle Coffee.

We can take advantage of the other side of this. That's our next merch idea. No Rifle Coffee. Instead of flavoring your coffee, you just get one of those pills you guys are pushing these days? Yeah. The ejaculate? Yeah.

You get a couple shots of that in there. Would you like some ejaculate? It comes out like milky white out of a big pump. Would you like some ejaculate enhancement? Because if you would like two or three bottles, then we can send you the link and you can purchase them. Offering me?

Very kind of you. Like a 5% discount? 10%. 10%? We can send you the link and you can buy some. That's fucking funny. I should ping him up I want a silly amount I think he'd do that for us what's another stupid name

for a safety on no because that's still a gun what's an anti-gun product we could make and take advantage of this? To be the foil to black rifle coffee. What do people who don't like guns like? Unarmed coffee. Hands up coffee.

Conscientious objection coffee. Don't shoot coffee. Don't shoot. Flower barrel coffee. No, that sounds like. Pussy coffee. Pussy coffee. We might be stepping on that celebrity That's like selling pussy scented candles

Gwyneth Paltrow Yeah She'll kick your ass She's an Avenger Yeah she's Tony Stark's girl So she gets a I don't know if she's literally an Avenger She's in the Avengers

They gave her one of those suits Yeah right but are they all... I don't know if she's literally an Avenger. She's in the Avengers. They gave her one of those suits. Yeah, right, but are they all Avengers? I don't know. She showed up at the end, though. She did, yeah. The trouble is she's so effective. Like, Tony Stark took a couple movies before he was good at operating that thing.

Hey, did they retcon the events of Iron Man 3? Clearly they did, to some extent because remember at the end of iron man 3 he destroyed all of his suits and he was like no more iron man obviously that couldn't stay but remember she got those powers i don't know

she had super powers she was impervious to fire and i think i do remember dune powers where she was impervious to fire. You know what I do remember? Dune. I was going to say that. I wish you'd watch Dune.

You had homework to watch Dune for a week now. You had enough time today to watch Dune twice and you said that wasn't enough time. This is gross exaggeration. What actually happened was yesterday evening at 8 p.m. You said, hey, you should watch Dune so that we can talk about it tomorrow. And I was like, oh, yeah, I'll get right on that.

We haven't watched for that show, the PKM. Oh, well, then I'm misremembering. Don't go against my memory, Kyle. You'll never win. He's always right my apologies i'll tell you what actually happened i i i looked at the movie and i really didn't feel like i was in the mood to watch it and i didn't realize and and and also i didn't realize that like anybody would really want to talk about it i I thought maybe we'd just touch on it a little, but now you've kind of made it a big topic thing. So I will step away if you guys want to talk about Dune, because I haven't watched it, and I do want to watch it because I'm excited to watch it.

We could actually do that. You know what? We'll just drop the spoilers now tag so you can come back safely when we're finished. Or, I mean, you could – no, no, no. I'll step away. You'll continue to – oh, I see what you mean. That's when you know to come back. Yeah okay okay i'm just gonna go over here so i can like see that i'm gonna go the back porch is behind me i'm gonna go out there sure so taylor you watched

dune and you had a not too far in different opinion than me but different what did you think yeah so like one overall i was not blown away by it. It, you know, just high level first, like it kept my attention and it has a very deep world with a lot of like, kind of, you know,

tendrils going out to different things. And it's clearly like, there's a lot of depth to it. And I liked that. I, you said you thought it went on a little too long. Like I disagreed, like totally the opposite way because I felt like they were they would introduce like ancillary groups to like the families.

And then they would immediately like act like that was a foregone conclusion. And you should know who these people are or like the prophecy would come about or like the Sears when they go in there. And there's a bunch of references to an old fucking prophecy and i was hoping like oh yeah i want more backfill i want more backstory on how this effectively a coven of witches is behind the scenes manipulating the politics of the families and then you know two quarters or two quarters three quarters of the way through that's just another family introduced on the side of the way through they bring in like that third family because it had just been the two you know the antagonist family and then atreides and then they're like oh and now there's the sakinian family who's coming to help this other and it's

like okay well i wish i knew more about i forgot the name of them but i this other family with the really tough fighters is sarkin or something sarkin and sarconin let me jump in for a second a little differently if i'm watching a movie and then you spend whatever like 12 minutes giving me shit that's not on the test right that's just ancillary and then we never visit it again you've wasted my time right when i tell you what happened in that movie i don't cover the bullshit that's not on the test i tell you the central like core timeline i feel like if you just shoot straight up the middle and skip all the side quests on dune this is a 60 second description for a two and a half hour movie of what happened and that to me is a sign of a poorly done movie i just don't think that they fleshed out the world

enough like there there's clearly a lot of depth there when they would reference the coven or that third family not the harkonnen or the atreides the other one like not a family hackanin harkonnen isn't that one aren't you talking about sardicar the sardicar that was the third family they're not a family okay well then see i didn't know who that was they were bringing in soldiers from some other banner and i was like i wish i had a little backstory on who these guys are and why they're against uh the atreides five second backstory on it yes i would actually they are the elite imperial guard they're essentially the emperors so this is the the feudal structure of this is like an emperor with a bunch of lords and the the the lords are under the emperor but they all have their own power so this

is the emperor's elite troops being brought in which is a big part of the plot because the emperor's elite troops are not supposed to be being used against any individual house so those being brought in is really indicative of the emperor is supporting this kill this kill of the atreides family essentially okay yeah that makes sense i i would have loved to get a little more info on the emperor i'm sure they're holding that back on purpose to keep like suspense up for all that because you didn't really get any empire any direct empire look uh but yeah it just felt like there's so much density to this story they could have made it a six movie series and explored a lot of this a lot more but it felt almost like

they were rushing they could have made it a six movie series and i would have liked it maybe even more like it sounds like i'm asking for less i'm just saying if you're gonna have a lame little branch that doesn't go anywhere that's worse than no branch and not as good as a great strong branch i really like that i like the film a lot and then although i feel i'm getting more pushed towards that direction as i hear criticism against six a lot of things you're saying, I didn't find to be criticism. And I liked some of the shortcuts they took with explaining things. Because there's so much backlog of things to kind of get through. That I liked that they were moving the movie forward while still giving hints of these things.

And I thought they did a lot of that visually. I thought the shots of the ships were really cool. It gave this sense of future tech. And divergent from our humanity kind of tech right like real alien looking stuff but still in this kind of future to like to to suggest that this stuff is divergent and different and then like i don't know i liked a lot of that i when i my biggest complaint of that initially was there's a big part of this world that didn't get explained in there somewhere which was along the lines of you know technology is all all person centric in this world right yeah like ai computing

machines aren't allowed anymore and there's there's a whole history with that and that that world of that and i thought that was really central to that because sometimes you look at the shit you're like why are they flying this how can that ship run like underneath the ship without getting shot why are these people doing these things as opposed to a computer doing it they're flying around in spaceships and i felt like that for me like was a bit of a hole logically if you don't know the backstory of that was never explained but i thought by and large i did a really great job of for me situating this family structure this this feudal system in space in the future with these cool scenes of like showing like the sizes of these things and like the i don't

know i loved it i loved the i hadn't seen one take on it there's some things that you saw on it that i didn't for example i what i was gonna say before you started was you know who loved this movie this movie this movie fucking loves itself with its grand cgi 45 90 second like rolling into watching the the ship the room the landscape whatever and i'm like oh my fucking god i get it your cgi budget was high i get it i get it but now you're like no woody they're trying to tell you something quickly about what the tech looks like and it's like okay all right maybe maybe you felt these saw through a different lens same with the infrastructure though right like that's those huge shots of these of these massive buildings with like this imperial architecture it's supposed to be the feudal stuff right this is supposed to be the power and wealth

of these noble families and imperial imperial structures compared to everything else out there i thought it was just like such a cool shortcut with this and and to your point about i thought the movie was jacking off to pictures of itself that's how i interpreted it but i see what you see now and i watched uh i watched a interview with the um i think god must be the director right who put this together and and this is a love letter to the to the book right this is a guy who's like a huge fan of this who was was trying to do it justice, you know, to like put like the imagery of the book in the story into into film. And I thought it did an incredible job with that, by and large. I thought there was something cool about the universe. Actually, the combat is the thing about Dune that I like the most.

And for people who don't know the universe at all, this is what's up. They wear these shields during combat that don't interfere with you. They're not like a suit of armor. It's like an electric suit of armor almost, such that bullets and fast-moving things, even a fast-moving sword, wouldn't penetrate this. But slow-moving things do penetrate it. So you can interact with the world as if you weren't wearing this thing. You could pick up a ball and throw it like normal.

But if I were to shoot a gun, then your shield would block it. So the way that they do combat is they have to like, I don't know, like sort of position before submission. Like they have to get the guy in a spot and then slowly push the dagger through the shield. And it means that like,

that's how combat happens. A gun doesn't work in this universe because the shield stopped fast moving things and from a like viewer standpoint it's like oh i like this because it it is hard to rationalize how jedis are the most badass people in star wars when it would seem like a dude with a blaster or sh or four dudes with a blaster would eventually get through his blaster deflecting lightsaber. But in this, you really

do get on board with it. It's like, yeah, guns, things like that, they don't work that well. You can't help but imagine that with that much technology, though, they'd come up with something. Like something that can penetrate it. You know what they should have had? There's always an escalation as you go on woody the uh playing q you know from james bond a gun that shoots a net right just like hold the guy down like a net with the weights on the end

that traps him and then you can slow kill him that would be a really effective range weapon that might that actually like i'm i i buy into like the you know that's just the universe like they don't have guns and that's probably for the best like to keep the the fighting better and more intense it does but like something i didn't like is when they get hit and it flashes red around them like it is a very like i was watching that top down part of the battle where they're all fighting and it's like it really is just a mishmash blur of blue and red at a couple points and it's like i'm not even able to like see the people swing and it's just kind of mushy so that was distracting i think it sounds like you didn't notice blue means the shield stopped it red means the shield's been

penetrated yeah yeah and it was just like it was a top-down battle and so you're seeing like a bunch of blue and red and it was like disorienting where it's like i'm more focused on the colors flashing than i am trying to like watch somebody's sword or something like that so i'm seeing the red is a clue that people are dropping on the battlefield but think of think of what this does for like both cinematography and like storytelling and then also what the implications of this world are right because there's none of this because they've gone away from computing and they try to do this by the betterment of a person so they have like these human computer type the mentat stuff right which are these super you know the superhumans essentially and the whole benedicte thing is breeding the superman kind of deal this is all of and then the shields make it so

individual combat is a realistic thing again in the future. You know, like all of these things are about then like hero figures. The whole world is structured around impressive entities, right? The impressive leader of this family who's trained in all these things, capable of all these things, individually changes things. And the whole film, I mean, first of all, that's really good. That sets up a really good stage for storytelling because then you have these heroes that are kind of ridiculous in some movies, have a bit more sense in this world. And then second, the whole structure of everything in that supports it, which is so cool to like watch and see that. So I feel like I like hearing about Dune more than I like watching. Because to watch it is just to watch slow CGI scenes unfold for two and a half hours.

Have you read the books? You seem to have a deep knowledge. Okay, that makes sense. Yeah, I read the books as a kid, and then I listened to them again with my wife. How old were you when you read the books? God, I don't remember now. Yeah, I read the books when I was too young to read them.

I was in middle school, and I don't get it. You know who I liked as a character, who I hated in the original dune because he was disgusting is the head of house harkonnen who like floats around the baron like i i liked him a lot like i watched the first dune a couple years ago on kyle's recommendation he's like just go into it knowing that it's horrible and it's just you're watching it because it's silly like don't take it seriously and like that guy he's like got like pustules and boils going off but they got that guy from um chernobyl i don't know him from other stuff but that actor from chernobyl and he's got that grizzled voice

where he's going to do it we're going to take us to tradies and it's like yeah okay this guy i'm he's not a goofy fucking idiot like the old version of him. He's actually like pretty imposing. And in the first one, like when that guy would like float at someone, it was like an unintimidating bubble almost. But this guy is like, even though he's like a big, fat, disgusting blob, he's like a very powerful, big, fat, disgusting blob who's like floating towards you with authority. And so I thought that they did a good job mitigating that silliness from the previous one and making it intense yeah i like him he's menacing he's a he's an actual villain as opposed to a clown now which is really nice yeah the first one it's like he's like having trouble wiping his ass like spinning around like it's charlie in the chocolate factory and they have to like rope them back down to clean them this first one was so bad you know yeah it was i'm really excited about this i'm hoping this is the start of a series i i mean it's going to be based on you know how it does right this is the decision about whether or not

they make more of these this is always designed to be essentially beginning of a series of these and i hope they do because i i thought the first one it went on a bit long for me overall and it was very visual like parts of the story i thought dragged a little bit for these visuals but the visuals in context like but it required a lot of extra context, right. For, for this to be so cool. But for me,

they were really good. I was really, I left that really impressed with that, that film, which it doesn't happen a lot to me when I watch this. So, well, it looks like they're already planning three and they split the first novel

into two, which I'm sure you, you must've noticed. So yeah, hopefully they'll parse it out even more. Maybe have four or five movies. It's a cool universe. The next ones might be better because the first one has a lot of like ever tell a story

like if i were to tell you a story about formula one well first i need to tell you 13 things about formula one you don't know already and now you'll understand why this is interesting dune had that same problem to solve it's like i need to explain to you the shields, the tech, the families, this, that, and the other thing. And they still miss shit. By movie two, they can just be like, and here's what happens next. And that's it. Just give me the good shit that I'm looking for.

So maybe it'll be great. I don't know. I guess I'm like the masses in that I enjoy a movie that has a big universe. Show me another universe. Show know, I enjoy it. Show me another universe. Show me Lord of the Rings. Show me Game of Thrones.

Show me whatever. Marvel. I'm digging your entire universe. I like your rules. I'm here. But anyway, so now that we know the universe's rules, maybe next movie will flow better. Yeah. One more example from this, Woody, for that world and the universe for this right because you bring that up

you know um so this is a big spoiler now so if you haven't seen this movie sorry i'm gonna actually be specific about it you know the attempted assassination scene where they're trying to kill paul and there's an actual guy buried in the wall to do that that's that's more of the lack of computers why wouldn't this just be a drone they sent off in this because there are no drones in this universe there's no autonomous things like this so it's literally a guy who's who's expected to die there and just to stay dedicated enough to that family for whatever hold they have over him to stay and attempt to assassinate this guy by manually controlling this device to go after him kind of deal it's just like even that like doesn't make any sense outside of like the rest of the framework for why that would be true but when you

get like why that would be true there it's a lot more it's definitely more of an interesting scene at least to me something that was that like i was watching it with my wife and this like jumped out at her she's like there's like house harkonnen and house atides. And then there's just this guy named like Tucker Alamo who's, who's out there like fighting and it's just a disjoint. What was that guy's name? Oh, Duncan, Duncan.

I think it's Duncan Idaho, right? Duncan Idaho. Yeah. Close enough to Tucker Alamo, but Duncan Idaho was such a bizarre, like little throwback. I was hoping they would give an example of why his name is duncan

idaho because it you know what i mean there are fantasy names like if some guy named alan was in the the nine lord of the rings members that would stand out like a sore thumb like aragorn gimley and alan like it would be disjointed and so all these cool fantasy names and then fucking you know but paul paul's not much of a fantasy name either right that's true but that's a normal name where it's like okay that's just a guy named paul in the universe but you know tucker alamo that that was a bit disjointed or whatever his name is now i'm not going to be able to remember his name ever okay duncan i don't that's what it is but yeah i'll i'll tell kyle he can come back. I really enjoyed that.

Where are you living now? I'm not trying to dox you. I said this last time I was here too. I'm in Cedar Rapids, Iowa right now. For the long haul. Oh, I liked Iowa. I just was there a little bit. Yeah, Iowa's cool. I like it more than I would have guessed.

Bought a house out here. Oh yeah? Are you in uh you're in the house now you have proper internet all that i do no longer fiber that is here no longer in a depression chamber in a local office building no no escaped the office building and at home finally we're streaming for sure that's funny like even as a streamer you had to escape the corporate life for it did make it it did make it that extra step of miserable for sure like anytime like you're doing this you're like okay well at least i like my job i work from home and you're like traveling to an office there and you're just like oh no like you're so visible i gotta pop in your stream and ask the same question every day you can start with where are you living now filthy where are you and then do it again

twice in a row it's not fair well that's good because that was genuinely depressing that time after the show where you flipped it around and showed that thin office window where you look out it's because i know exactly how that is sitting in that office and looking out that window and being like god if there were a blade or something like yeah like how is this different than minimum security prison i had all the motion sensors too for the lights and i would go in because i'd stream on the weekends and no one else would be there on the weekends except me so i would i would like arrive in the way because i was doing those in the winter months i'd arrive it'd be dark i'd go in all the lights. I would go in because I'd stream on the weekends and no one else would be there on the weekends except me. I would arrive because I was doing those during the winter months. I'd arrive, it'd be dark.

I'd go in, all the lights would shut down after I came in. They'd light up as I walked in and shut down as I got in there. Then I'd come out for water or something in the middle of the day and there'd be no one in the office and it's just all dark in there. Whenever I had to work long hours,

you work and dinner comes and goes and then somewhere around 8pm all the lights turn off around you. And you're like trying to get the turn back on. And then the HVAC changes. So you have to manually find you can press a button on these little support columns

to turn the HVac back on so your little section of the building is properly heated or cooled and uh it and then it only lasts like 30 minutes or so then you have to do it again it's every like 30 minute reminder that you shouldn't be there yeah but no one else is here it's just you working by yourself it's crushing yeah it is yeah thankfully lots of people are never going about you're reminiscing about corporate america about uh filthy's old position where he had to sit in that office and woody and i were saying how how much that stinks and we get it and like how so many people especially like millennials and younger are not going back to offices like they they will. They will quit before they do it because there is no reason.

There's no reason. I have it. So right now, the balance of power has shifted towards the employees. The economy is actually very good. Unemployment is four point seven percent. The Dow Jones Industrial Average is at an all-new high. I promise you, if Trump were president right now, Republicans would be banging the gong about how fantastic things are.

I bet. But those are the realities, that unemployment is super-duper low and staff is in short supply. So that staff has recognized their advantage you know i think um last i looked the uh what the fuck is john deere what i'm getting it wrong the tractor people kyle john deere you guys ever john deere okay i don't know why i can't think of it john deere they went on strike their latest offer was to double their pay and increase their benefits that's great i thought thought it was the increase.

They were doubling the increase offer. Oh, maybe that. All right. Well, you know, when you read headlines, you don't get fully informed. I don't know. I didn't. I just read a headline too.

But I agree. I think I did a double take. I'm like, what? Their offer was just to double their pay? Like, what the fuck? All right. All right. Well, anyway, employees everywhere

are recognizing their advantage and asking for more, which is smart. I applaud them. But someday the unemployment rate won't be 4.7% anymore, and they might get people to come back to the office. That's where all that was headed. I've been seeing some interesting stuff where it's like you'll see companies being like, there's a worker shortage. So Chipotle won't be able to get this done for you or there's only two people working and like i think it's maybe michigan or some other state instead of them like raising wages to get people back they're like now we're hiring people as young as 14 it's like they would rather go back

to child labor than pay people something more fair. Specifically, 14-year-olds weren't allowed to work past a certain time of day. I don't know what it is. In New Jersey, I know it's 11 because that impacted me. It's just because the motion sensors can't spot them. They're too small. Yeah. So they're changing the laws to be like, all right, now kids can work until any time of day.

And it's like any number of hours. Forget the 12-hour day. Is that going to be good for the film industry? I didn't consider that. There's going to be a bunch of new diehard movies coming out with a 14-year-old star. No, no, no. Whenever you've got a kid in your movie, it's a real problem. That's why so many twins end up being like child actors and because you get

to work them for twice as long yeah and the director gets access to two children now yeah that was good or producer whatever Weinstein was there used to be a word for menage a trois that involves two children oh

it's a fucking felony going to jail award for menage a trois that involves two children. It's a fucking felony. Go into jail. Go get an ice cream sandwich. That is pretty absurd, though. Being like, yeah, we're not raising our pay. We're just going to start hiring 14-year-olds. Peritoire.

Which I do not. Yeah. That is a corporate- friendly way of dealing with that Problem I Can't gloss over that That Zach came up with Woody asked what do you call a three

Way with two children and Zach said a pedo Toi Show Blanks a pedo twa it's a sick line show those in the blanks that man has three children folks all nine months apart yeah this is more than tech issues hot load um what was i gonna say i lost my train of thought anyway yeah yeah but whatever i like that employees are sort of pressing their advantage and getting what they can yeah like in some ways for the anti-work like i'm here i feel it like i'm here for it i like it in some ways the anti-work it's like you know you've got a little anti-ambition here. I never see anti-work people being like, you know, you should start your own business.

You should buy some houses, fix them up, flip them. There's a lot of money to be made in this. A little sweat equity will help you build your wealth. It takes a lot of capital to flip houses. It takes like none. At least my friends do it with none. I mean, you have to get approved. You use other people's money first time

homeowner no down payment stuff uh i'm trying not to dox anyone but it's like i think once you get it rolling it rolls quite easily and there's a lot of um tools in place to get things rolling so like if this fucking it can be done buyers markets any any sense of it you've got it's not it's not like you like check some boxes on a website and you can flip houses uh he's not saying that in in this case they were able to buy without saving a lot of money and then fix it up sell it or rent it uh airbnb is a thing now like there's a couple people in my life making like actual money on airbnb oh you know what here's here's the thing i see on reddit a lot and i don't get it so maybe you could explain it to me maybe i'm in the dark

here and and i'm the only one why do they hate landlords they seem to like demonize like the the idea of someone making money by owning property and the idea of there even being landlords and like I haven't seen this I know what you're talking about I've seen bad landlords get hated on no no no deservingly so the concept of there being landlords people who profit from just

owning a bunch of property that's where reddit goes too liberal on me this is the socialist stuff that's going around right now right the idea that this is someone making money what is it i don't i don't want to go into the terms i don't know the fucking terms like i don't want to guess it wrong kind of deal but it's like the like away from like the what is it the means of the production kind of deal so this is someone who's just taking taking money from someone else for doing nothing is a kind of sentiment of that what it's actually is a guy who took on a risk by buying, by making a huge investment,

oftentimes with their own two hands, fixing up a place and making it nicer than it was before increasing its value, renting it out. And then these renters are like, fuck you. Why do you get to do this? Dude,

you could have, this is available to all of us, especially if you haven't bought a home before. Yeah. I mean, I like, yeah, I see where you're coming from with the middle of the road thing. They are going too far with every landlord is bad or something. I'm not that clued into that universe. I can definitely empathize with the concerns I've seen, which is every adult in my life told me to go to college, and that would give me a job that paid me enough that I could get a comfortable house.

I could start saving. I could prepare to get a mortgage. And it's like, oh, well, now I'm in crippling debt. This degree every adult in my life told me to get is no longer as valuable as it was when they got it. And I'm being told, oh, well, sorry, you're up shit creek. You better go work at Domino's with your $35,000, $40,000 in debt. So I had a different sort of underground degree. All right.

So I want to hear your feedback on this. Growing up, my father didn't say get a degree and you'll have this future. He said, Woody, he doesn't call me Woody. Woody, 80% of degrees are bullshit. You need a job training degree. You can be a doctor. You can be an engineer. You can be a nurse.

You can be an accountant. I'm like, I think I want to get a business degree. No. Business is a general bullshit degree that doesn't get you a job. Accounting is a degree. Mechanical engineering is a degree. Computer science. These are job training degrees.

What about English? English is for finding a husband. That's what the English degree is for. It is not for getting a job afterwards. This is like what I learned. So when I hear other people say, man, I got this degree and now there's no jobs on the other side. I'm like, well, yeah, you got the wrong one. They didn't tell you these were the wrong ones they told me that these were bullshit degrees and that there aren't like it's not job training the job training degrees are the ones i remember when i was maybe other people didn't hear this yeah yeah i i formulated this by watching seinfeld as a kid as bizarre as that sounds because i just remember like the characters in that show and how like they had those nonsensical degrees and like how like whenever george wanted to go get a job he couldn't because he had like he had like an english degree or something like i don't remember

what george costanza's degree is in i wish i did off the top of my head but it's something like that was a thing in that show it wasn't architecture but like he's always struggling because like what do you do he's like well i i worked at vandal a industries and it's like he's always struggling because what do you do? Well, I worked at Vandalee Industries. He's going to make it up the whole way through. Philosophy. Philosophy is a degree that oftentimes lawyers take.

You get a philosophy in your undergrad, but know that you're taking a giant risk. If you don't actually get accepted into law school and then pass law school and become an attorney then you don't have then you basically you you ruined it chose a degree that doesn't get you a job that that's what philosophy is oh did you are you great i'm sure no i have a i have a psychology degree undergraduate psychology degree which was almost useless for me when i finished uh finished my undergrad there are a lot of um therapy degrees that are similar and i might

be off on this but i think i'm on target like if you finish with an undergrad and you want to be a physical therapist or a occupational therapist or something like that you can't get a job that some jobs require masters and i think psychology is one what's interesting there was stuff i could do but almost nothing was particularly well paid and almost none of it was particularly interesting work either for me so it was like i had to go back and get my graduate degree before anything would open up some jobs one thing that's always been interesting to me like you mentioned the two kinds of degrees um now you can't really pull like a frank abagnale jr and just go become a doctor or become a lawyer because those are like job training degrees like you said like even in that movie catch me if you can like he thinks it's cool

to be a doctor until like that kid comes in all fucked up and he's like vomiting in the in the broom closet because he saw a skint knee he's like oh wait wait a minute i can't be a doctor this is dumb and then he goes and pretends to be a fucking lawyer and uh but but like you can't do those things what you could do is like any of those jobs that require a business degree, it seems like, why can't you just get a fake diploma? What if you just printed out a fake business? I don't know what kind of job requires a business degree.

May as well try. It's not a crime. Is it a crime? To print out a fake business degree? There's no way that's a crime. There's just no way. There's whole institutes devoted to exactly that. All right, but it's signed by the Ronald McDonald House.

Here's my thing. It seems like University of Georgia prints out, I don't know, how many of those a year, those diplomas. So why can't I, as a private individual, print myself one out? I have two. What gives them the right? Buy or make fake diplomas. It is fraud if you try to

pass them off as real. But they won't know it'll be so good. Alright, so let's talk about it. The fine print, this is not real. Because the way that you check to see if a diploma is real is like a bouncer checking your ID. You're like, you're holding up the light. It's got like a business with a z in it here's the thing let's say that your business having an s in it yeah that was like

it must have been a different timeline all right so let's let's assume you're applying for some sort of manager middle level management position at like some some it doesn't matter what company your job is going to be like managing people in an office scenario perhaps and you need this this degree this that you are going to fake are they really going to like fucking like check it out really or like call anybody or like scan a fucking barcode i think they're just going to be like oh okay you've got a you got your degree from blah blah blah and you were here for this number of years okay and like yes i think if you go to a big enough company if you're working for pepsi or cisco or oh yeah maybe then they check you if you're working for someone small then they don't yeah i would imagine and it'll

probably go by like whether or not you're doing your job like if you're faking it and you truly have made it and you see no idea what you're doing. See, that's where the genius comes in of picking a job that you can do A, but also that your business degree would cover, your fake business degree. You wouldn't become a doctor or a lawyer. You're anti-switching someone's dog out without their knowledge, but you're pro-hiring someone who doesn't actually have the right degree? Yes. You're okay with switching your degree out on someone? Absolutely. I'm glad you're

keeping up. And you're also willing to send me that link still, right? Yeah. If I'm being honest, I'm not going to send you the link, but whenever this is published on Saturday, you can just go into the description.

You can look it up yourself. He doesn't have the skill set. He's been lying about this skill set the entire time. Actually, that is true. Kyle is the worst copy-paste driver I've ever met. Yeah, I don't know. I've been teasing about it for 10 years. Yeah, Control-C, Control-V.

I don't get it. At first, he pushed back. Like, no, Woody, I'm good at it. I feel like now he's come to accept that he's actually slow at copying. He was still right-clicking a year and a half ago. I got fed up with it. I got some pedals under my desk.

One of them is control C, one of them is control V. I'm the fucking control copy-paste master. One of the pedals, really? It injects me with something and then I'm happy again all right so you are you walk in you you've you're past the hiring process at this company you're a businessman now at least as far as they know vandal a industries you go into their let's say it's fucking i don't know pick a company you'd like to work at and then what's the idea that you would

come to the floor with where they'd go, man, this guy, he's not lying at all. Definitely. He knows. That's how they think about it too. You go into the Chipotle board meeting, you need to have an idea. Day one, they're calling on you. We need to revolutionize

our business, Mr. Myers. I didn't make some money. Here's what I would do. They want to revolutionize our business, Mr. Myers. What if our product didn't make some money? Here's what I would do. They want to revolutionize Chipotle? We need to take Chipotle and totally flip it on its head. Okay, so what I would do is I would need a day

to come up with my proposal at least. They can't expect me to just have this ad-libbed. Then, I call my friend that works at corporate for Chick-fil-A and I get her to do my work for me. And I turn that in.

A double cheat. Yes, double cheat. Yeah. You know at Chick-fil-A behind the glass, they have all those little buckets full of pickles or whatever. Oh, stop it. I said Chick-fil-A, but I meant Chipotle.

Anyway, you can say I want this, I want this, and they build your thing along the way. Is that not how Chipotle works? Am I mixing up my restaurant? No, I just didn't know what the fuck you were talking about, Chick-fil-A. Have one of them be juice enhancer. We can just leverage lock and load the ideas we've come up with already and we use them you shoot out both ends this is a winning idea just be like hey jizz enhancer and then they sprinkle it on and you suddenly your sandwich is

better than it would have been we need to get our jizz we need to get our jizz enhancer in storefronts i was saying this on pk and starbucks you need to get our Giz Enhancer in storefronts. I was saying this on PKM the other day. Starbucks. You need to go into Starbucks. No, no. But seriously, though, I was in this adult toy store or something like that, whatever you want to call it, yesterday, an adult store. They got dildos and vibrators and lube and shit. My guest room.

And the whole area around the counter was full of all sorts of products like Lock and Load. We need to invade that retail space. That's what we need to do. Taylor, don't you do this for a living? I was about to tell you how you can do things like this. We would need to find whatever the biggest chain. He made it up. No, I printed it.

Whatever the biggest chain is, probably like adam and eve or something we need to figure out how to contact their buyer i'm sure that they have different buyers like they probably have a dildo buyer and a costume buyer maybe it's only one i can't imagine it's just one then we need to get in contact with him or her it's usually a woman and we would need to find a way to make a meeting where we could use some data probably from der Derek's site that we could make the case that, Hey, uh, what's the data looking like on your other, on your other come pills.

And they could be like, well, this is the amount we're making annually or quarterly. And okay. What kind of promotions are you doing for those? Oh, that's interesting. Okay. All right.

Well, this is our margin so far and we can do X, Y, Z. We, this would be like a Derek thing. I don't know what the margins look like on the backend, but yeah,

that's B that would be how you would do it. The only issue would be, is that I don't know what the margins look like on the back end. But yeah, that would be how you would do it. The only issue would be is that I don't know what kind of distribution those networks have. And unless we actually start buying advertising to push sales at that retailer, it will get deleted in a few weeks. They'll go, nobody's buying this. We're not going to do this. So in order to even do it, we would need to have an active and running marketing campaign driving weeks they'll go nobody's buying this uh you know we're not going to do this so that's it's a in order to even do it we would need to have an active and running marketing campaign driving people to adam and eve so for this product it is a lot of work to get into retail and so i just wanted to sell

i'm doing it but it's no work at all for me. Alright, so it sounds like Okay, hang on, hang on. So it sounds like you've got a real good idea of what needs to be done here and I'm glad to hear that. So, just give me an update in about six to eight hours. Two days. Yeah, six to eight hours.

Go ahead and get on your phone. And there's a risk to this too because if we enter a store and we're in the storefront that's now our like nielsen and iri data and so if that totally tanks and fails and we want to do this in the future at walmart they're going to pull up the past experience that this product didn't retail and go this did not sell we're not taking a risk this nielsen and our IRI data, IRI data. Can we fake that?

Like my diploma? No, no, there's no, would that be, would that be like, would that be what, what people like you,

what like nerds call fraud? It would be highly illegal to, to do, to do that because it's a little bit square. illegal I know I sound like a real bitch not wanting to Ryan Nielsen queer you're going to need to write this down

send it to Kyle in about a month he will copy paste that back to you and be like where are you on the progress for this are we in retail I'm just going to I'm just going gonna go take a pic i'm gonna put it in a store take a picture of it make you guys think i've done this no i literally want to be in brick and mortar i literally want to be in brick and mortar stores though like like there's something very appealing to that in general to me and like like i walked in like being a published author

it's not even about the money it's just having your product it's it's expensive there's there's like there's slotting fees for them to even place your your your why are you making this not fun i'm sorry i'll just give them a ring and say you want cum pills that's exactly what i want you to do i want you to call them and say hey is this is this the fucking cum palace? And they'll be like, yeah, this is the cum palace. Well, ha ha. It's funny. I'm also in the jizz biz, matter of fact, and then you tell them that

you've got the pills and you show them some of your Polaroids and the next thing you know, we're behind the counter. By Polaroids, you mean filled condoms. Yeah. You act like you're going to open up a briefcase for paperwork and it's just used condoms

stapled to the top of it. It's a calendar and every day I staple a used condom to a day. You know those advent calendars where every day has a candy in it every every day on my calendar has a christmas ones where it's a little like thing you open up and it's just like a jizz filled fucking condom in there every one of them every day is filled these new easter each one filled higher than the last

that's what it is and then we'll get in trouble because it's like caulk or something we get caught i'm telling you walk into a boardroom with a briefcase full of condoms used you'll make condoms dude unironically the you're walking out of there about getting the easiest part about getting this product into an actual store would be showing that it actually works because it does. Like that would be the easy part. It would be. It really does work. Like.

Yeah. And it would be marked up a bunch of like Adam and Eve compared to Derek's site. Interesting, though. Interesting to think about where like, are you are you imagining that, Kyle? Like walking into a sex shop with a lady friend and being like, what happened, Stance? You know I'm a part owner of this company. That's why you come so much? Yeah, yeah.

You didn't think this was all natural, right? No, I'm going to tell her the pills were based off of my DNA. I mean, the downside to it is there's rapes and murders popping up all over the country for me. No, not like that. They're not bottling my cum and selling it to people. They found that I was genetically superior and produced an enormous amount of semen and then studied me. And then using that information garnered from said study, they formulated. Okay.

As an adolescent, the first time you came, you almost drowned in your own semen. And from then on, you realized you had a superpower. It's your origin story. That's right. And it wasn't until my pastor told me many years later that this was unique. This was special. My pastor.

It took me a second to process that. You are made after the Lord's own heart, you little cummer. You got the Holy Ghost leaking out of that. The whole thing. Well, this is a natural time for it. We're going to hear from a couple of wonderful sponsors. Feels CBD. CBD isn't about what you feel. It's about what you don't feel. Stress, anxiety, pain, and feels is a better way to feel better.

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So check those two out. And of course, as always, check out Lock and Load. The ultimate comes up. It blows all the others out of the water. It's the only one that really works. We got science behind it. Science, beakers, beakers and science, all of the things that are associated with it. So check out that link below.

Code PKA. Have some savings. You're not going to read that ad read I sent you? Oh, shit. Oh, wait. Yeah, I'll read the ad read. That one's so much more fun. Did you change it?

There is a little. Yeah, don't mention that part with that three-letter agency, though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I haven't read through this. Honestly, I just scanned it. I read it. Alright. Do you have no... Okay, hold on.

No, this is a bad idea. We're selling cum pills. Read it. I'm trying to make it sillier. Do you have no self-esteem? A slow, dribbly cum shot? Girlfriend wants a facial, but you're too much of a beta bitch? Well, today's your lucky day, lad.

With this supplement, you can shower your girlfriend and cum from across the room. Show it off to all your friends and family. Impregnate 10 women at once and even feed the homeless. In seconds. Lock and load your new friendly load stack. Load stack loads. No proofreading here. The new way to shower.

He's going back to showering your friends and family. This is the worst read ever. Are you illiterate? It's repeating the same stuff over and over. He says three times in here to come on your friends and family. You know, you gave me a lot of shit about Dune. I sent this to you three days ago. You can fuck right

off with that. This is not equivalent to you not watching Dune. Okay, this is worse. This is so much worse. This is 30 seconds of work. I would have read it. Yeah. And you can have it now for only $49. You, yes you. You can spray cum like a garden hose, and we'll give you this offer right now. And right now, only if you order in the next 30 minutes.

That's not true. That's not true. You can get 10% off. Yeah, you heard that right. You can cum everywhere for 10% less. Amazing. So try Lock and Load. It will solve that dribbly cumshot issue. It'll solve world hunger.

World hunger. Wanting to come with friends and family. So that ad read is from Pojo because he is the only entry this week. He is also the winner this week of the Lock and Load ad read contest. We will need your entries in the YouTube comments down below. Next week's winner hopefully will be better. Thank you, Pojo.

Oh, the last thing. We'll change topics, but that PKA code gets you 10% off everything in Gorilla Mine. So if you want something else, maybe that terkesterone, that legal steroid thing that everyone's excited about, you can buy that along with your order and and if anybody wants to work out i highly recommend the bombsicle

uh pre-workout that derrick makes it's what i use it's so fucking good um let me take that back let me rewind a little i wouldn't drink it if i weren't using it to work out it is a delicious supplement it is not a soft drink it is not like my favorite beverage or anything. There's a difference. But for a supplement, it tastes really fucking good. And yeah. Kyle and I go different. So Kyle likes the supplement, the pre-workout with no stim. And then he takes his own stim if he wants it.

He gets to control it. I like the pre-workout with the stim just because I want the stim. I don't know. You can choose whichever one you want. Yeah, you probably never have that instance where you don't want it. There's sometimes when, um, like when I'm cutting weight,

I'm taking stims on like a regular basis anyway. So having them in my pre-workout messes that up. It's changes your dosage, right? Yeah. Yeah. I can see why you do what you do, but I like my way too.

Cause I just want the stim before the workout. For sure. If you're one of those people out there that's just been sitting, listening to the last few weeks going, I don't know if this cum supplement is for me. I don't know. I don't know. I'm Josh.

Josh. There's someone out there named Josh who just got spooked. Some dribbler. Yeah. Some little cum dribbler, some bitch, some dribbler who's not exploding with pride every time he comes. These are genuinely selling like hotcakes. So get over there and try.

It is so shocking how many people are buying these cum pills. It is. It genuinely is. So, you know, Derek's going to have to re-up again soon. So check it out. I hope you guys enjoy it as much as we all do. And I love, Kyle, I love your just true desire to get it into a retail store.

Because that would be like a true mark of achievement. I want to see it at CVS. I want to see it at Walmart. I want to see it lock and load at Advanced Auto Parts. I want to see it. That's my reason. I want to go. Make your own lube. What do you want to do when your That's my reason. I want to go. Make your own lube.

What do you want to do when your car's broken down? You want to relieve some stress. And now you can do it. I want to go to the mall to Cinnabon and for them to offer me a sample of Lock and Load.

Okay? I want it to be everywhere. Everyone should be shooting frothy, hot, thick, steaming loads of cum that are just viscous and thick and look more like some sort of curdled

dairy product than semen. It needs to be part of the entire planet's daily process, right? Everybody uses shampoo on a daily basis. You're kind of weird if you don't shampoo your hair. Lock and load should be a parallel. We need to figure out testing on the effects on women. If you don't shampoo your hair, lock and load should be a parallel. I don't think black people do that.

We need to figure out testing on the effects on women. What people have, what is that increasing? We don't know yet. Does anybody know anything about it? We don't. It might do nothing at all. We need to wait for the data, the hard data to come out.

Anyway, that's enough about our compils. Kyle, how much longer are you in your, your new home or your, your temporary temporary home are you heading out in the morning maybe staying you never know never know might just live in illinois two second uh backstory on that i'm in illinois right now now. The other night I was in Georgia and I was thinking,

I wish I was in Illinois. So I got in my car and I started driving to Illinois, as you do. And then I got here and I found an Airbnb. And so now I'm in Illinois. It's pretty nice here.

Illinois is right near Iowa because they both start with I. Yes. No. They are actually really close, but not for that reason, I don in Illinois. It's pretty nice here. Illinois is right near Iowa because they both start with I. Is it? Yes. No. They are actually really close, but not for that reason, I don't think. I mean, maybe. From where you are in Illinois, you're not going to zoop to Iowa from where you are in Illinois.

You could, I bet. From Southern Illinois, that'd be quite the drive. One day, you'd get there. Same day, I bet. Well, yeah, same day, but that'd be a pain in the ass. And they don't even have legal weed in Iowa. no no they do in illinois though nope they do in illinois it turns out um it's very expensive here um and in my look i get annoyed when people are like oh yeah the weed in cali it's so strong or no no it's about the weed and and in washington state i hate that because i'm just different exactly that that's kind of where i've always kind of

stood it's like how is your weed actually going to be different i get there are different kinds of weed but how is like the weed from a certain state just going to be hands of hands of hands down above like weed from another state This weed here kind of sucks. It does. Not only is it overpriced, but I ate a 100 milligram candy bar last night. And I will say this, it was delicious. If they sold these at the store, they'd be popular. Because there was no weed in it? Yeah, that's how they make it taste good they take the

way out yeah it was um it doesn't have that weedy taste that's why traditional candy is unmatched you know it was like uh it was like some sort of toffee bar but it sort of looked like a like a like a hershey's bar or something like that like square and everything and it was 100 milligrams and i ate the whole thing and i didn't notice that i had eaten it i didn't i never felt milligrams and you didn't notice yeah i didn't notice at all i had 50 of delta 8 the legal stuff and you definitely i definitely noticed until i fell asleep well i've been eating 1500 milligrams of delta 8 at a 1,500 milligrams. I wonder if ours could have been different.

I wonder if it's all dosed the same. I wonder if it's all processed the same. I wonder how quickly tolerances build up. I don't know any of that information, but I know that I eat 1,500 milligrams of Delta-8 at a time and I don't notice that either, really.

The guy at the counter acted like the edible I bought was the Mac Daddy Strong edible at that store. I'd love to know the brand. I'm going to do some more research. I threw the wrapper away. I'm going to look around. So far, my experience with recreational Illinois weed is that it's weak compared to what i was getting in colorado and way more expensive granted i'm not pot i know the the tax is included here in all the prices so like they have this process here that's real that's real interesting you go

in and there are kiosks like touchscreens and you go through like a touchscreen menu and you order what you want and you write your name and then you're allowed to go into another chamber where the business is done and someone's already got your order like put in a little bag and ready to go and you know you just exchange cash for your your weed. but it's a little more locked down in Illinois than it is in Colorado. There's armed guards and shit, and it's... I don't know. The employees seem all really friendly, but the process is a little sketchy. Hmm. How hard is it... I don't know how to answer this if I were you,

but Florida has medical marijuana. Can any non-Florida resident just go to a scam doctor and get his card like they're so i don't know what a scam doctor is woody that sounds like some some that sounds like a dark just a doctor who makes a business out of giving out medical marijuana cards oh you mean so you just go to weed doc.com and uh no no absolutely um so i thought that was i was about to go to weed doc.com i if it doesn't exist i'll suck your dick so um immediate google like come on it's gonna exist so um the the deal with Florida is I would need a, a,

at least a temporary resident residency so that, um, I could say that I was a temporary Florida residents and then I could get a medical license in Florida. So I would need an address there. Yeah. Hey, SS YouTube money coming back again.

Do you know that I've considered that? Like I was like, I was like, oh, no. If I had the fucking boat, I could get a Florida medical marijuana license and like just just drive like the four hours south and just smoke anytime I wanted. Like little vacations like that. Like four hours is nothing. Does everyone know the backstory on SS YouTube money? Kyle bought a sailboat to keep in Florida to give him a Floridian address. And I think the goal was to legally not have state taxes.

But it never really happened because he started getting these more advanced firearm licenses that required Georgia residency and sort of stability. So he couldn't just change up his address crazy. Am I on target? No, no, no. All right. he couldn't just change up his address crazy. Am I on target? No,

no, no, no, no, no. All right. So the, so all memes aside, I,

I'm more, I didn't lose a lot of money, but I lost some money, but I did not have to pay state. And the way it works is you don't have to pay state income taxes for the time that you're in Florida, which would be half the year. So you don't have to pay state

income taxes for 50 of the year so the days you upload videos yeah sure you know whatever whatever's the proper thing to do and um but no it worked out fine it had the firearms license never entered into it there was just a point where it was like i don're not saving a ton of money here or anything. We're just bleeding $10 a month here on slip fees or something when it's all said and done, and I just wanted rid of it. And I definitely lost a few thousand when I sold it. But all in all, when you consider the tax benefits, I think it cost me $3,000 to own a boat for a couple years,

something like that. I don't know. Okay. But no, if I had that thing still, I could, it counts as a residence because it had, there's some,

there's like a few check boxes you have to check, right? Like a bathroom, a bedroom, et cetera. And, um, the Marina where I had it slipped at,

um, you know, you've got like a PO box there. So that's your address. What's the lamest house you could have could you invest in a tent in florida i'm going to look i'm going to look in what the lamest house i could buy in florida is and like what if there's a rental property that's literally like 50 a month or something like that for like that that I could just have.

I don't want to do anything sketchy. I want it to be legal. I want it to stand up to the rule of law and everything. But I don't know. So your definition of sketchy is a little different than mine here, it sounds like. I want what legally qualifies. I just want to legally play as little as I can.

I just sublet a rental tent with five other people, but it's a six-man tent, so it's not sketchy. Oh, and I don't care about the taxes. I just want to be able to go down there and smoke weed whenever I want and not have to drive to Illinois. Yeah, you're not far. Illinois the closest? You're not super close, but you're not far from Illinois.

Illinois is seven hours away. Virginia doesn't have a way to purchase it yet even though they're legal and it's roughly seven hours as well but it would you know obviously it depends on which part of Virginia you're going to like maybe the part that's seven hours away is

never going to be any good because it's so rural and then Denver is really far going to be any good because it's so rural. And then Denver is really far. That is quite a track from you, yeah. Kyle, have you found... Kyle, I'm in. Sorry, go ahead. Kyle has not moved again yet. He's still tracking

around. So he's still in Georgia? Yeah, still in Georgia. Have you found any really good public street fighting videos in a while no because i never know where to look for the i've actual public on pka is videos we don't show to people and i feel like we bring it up every week hey guys let's talk about more videos we're not showing you fair enough yeah i thought we could show fight stuff because it's usually just like someone's phone the thing we can't show almost the most i thought that was sports yes why uh what's the

limitation on this the legality of it in some way generally youtube has stepped up its um copyright claim and they have an anti-fighting thing in particular, like to show stuff. They knock your video or get strikes and shit like community guidelines. They're not all, YouTube is not about stealing people's content like it used to be. And they're not about fights.

Well, that's so disappointing. Okay. Well, that's fair. But on the fight thing, Kyle, have you followed UFC 268?

It is in like three days or the day this video comes out. And it is pretty much a Super Bowl UFC event. Dude, wait. That's not the one that's got Usman, is it? It is on Saturday. Does that also have Rose? Yes. I don't know how I'm going to be able to.

I'm going to be here still. Okay. Yeah. So I was just looking at it um i'm not going to be at this house i'm transferring to another house that's a little nicer um but uh i'm it doesn't matter it's neither here nor there i'm just worried about the tv situation now because i really want a laptop most of the time. But yeah, so the main card is five fights, and that means there's ten fighters. I care about eight of those fighters, which is maybe five more than a normal card.

It's pretty badass. So, of course, Usman fights Covington. That in itself, it seems like UFC is a little short on interesting fighters right now and covington is near the top of the list his nicknames are creative on like a trump level but it's still working for me he calls uh uzman kamara uzman juice man because he looks like he's on steroids and covington just sits there at the camera perplexed like i don't get it the guy's 32 years old he's got pimples on his back and his shoulders

it's like a second puberty it must be like a chemical imbalance who knows why this could happen to marty juice man it's hilarious does he really have acne on his shoulders he does but he's black so it doesn doesn't have red dots and show in the same way it does on white people. But he does. There's a guy in his division called Kamzat Shamirov or something like that.

It's a hard name for me. Anyway, he calls him Kamshot. I don't know. It just does. We should get him on Lock and Load. Kamshot. Yeah, he's a real good troll the stuff he does on social media is is always ridiculous he's always got like girls that are barely

clothed and he's I think I think his opening like like line is always what's up virgins and nerds I think like that's his intro therefore I like it I like yeah he's trolling i i you know sometimes i can't tell what's him and what's the thing like what's up virgins and nerds with the bikini girls

and stuff like all right clearly he's he's being a showman here but then there's some other stuff like he was ripping on a competitor fellow a guy in his weight class because he got knocked out with COVID. And he's like, how weak is this guy? It's a common cold. 99.9% survivor. Most people get it. They don't even know they have it. This guy goes nine months without fighting.

He's got to quit the UFC. This is a weak-willed, poor constitutional man. And I'm like, I might be marking out for the gimmick here because i think he believes this no i don't know i think that's the character again because that's too mean um i think it's all i think it's almost all a character because um i don't know i don't know i think there's some some some covington in there but i could be marking up so who knows i don't think he was always like that though but yeah you're right That's a huge fight because the last fight was closer than I think people remember because I went back and watched it, and I think it was all tied up going into the fifth round. And so, dude, he would make such a better champion.

I like a champion who's brash and entertaining like that. And when they've got the belt, they're able to really stand on a larger stage in front of more eyes and and i think it would also give him like carte blanche to to say more ridiculous things he's like i am the champ like he can talk more shit when he's the champion it's hard to get your jaw broken and then go talk shit both literally and like street rap style it's just like wait are you talking shit he just broke your jaw like you can't really say anything he hasn't fought he maybe fought one time since he lost to uzman before and um uh he blamed his corner he's like my we're in between rounds and my corner tells me to breathe that's not advice i need we're all good at breathing everyone here knows how to breathe

you know like i want some actual advice i can use when i go out there again that now i don't i used to watch uh i forget the name of john jones's coach wrinklin anyway first thing he'd tell his fighter is like all all right, deep rest, calm down. And basically he got him to get more rest out of that two minutes than he would have otherwise or one minute, whatever it is between rounds. So like, I get it. Like first thing, calm the fighter down. Then I speak to the calmed version of him. But I also think if I was in that, for me as a make-believe fighter, I would want my corner to be like, dude, he hates your right.

He hates your right. Keep firing that thing. It's scaring him. And once you get him backed up, then you can do your three-punch combo. It'll work. That's what I'm listening for. I would want technical stuff as well. Unless like whether it's something like, hey,

every time you're throwing that jab like like he's he's he's like lowering his left hand he's dropping his left every time you throw it every time you throw you've got to follow up you've got punches and bunches that's what i want to hear i'm like i'm inspired now or if he says hey man hey when you throw that leg kick are you noticing how much he hates it no no i'm actually like looking at his knee because i'm throwing a leg kick well he hates it or the other side hey woody every time you throw your left you bring it back to your ribs instead of your jaw you know keep that hand up he's gonna start noticing it um you know stop doing that whatever that's the advice i want

if they just say breathe you can get them you look good in there buddy that's not helping me all right so anyway a bit like a poker movie with a with a tell though are we really going to see that in every single fight is it like so noticeable to the people not involved in it that you could realistically and reliably do that a lot more than a live tell because you know they are going in there and like fighting right so like they're matching up in various ways and and like there's always going to be some room for improvement it might not be as definitive as oh when you do this he does that so now you do this and you win like it's not going to be that but it's it there's going to be some room for improvement like after the first round that they should be able to see maybe it's hey circle away from his right you're circling into his power

hand like circle circle away all right get away from the cage what are you doing he's bullying you like it could be something as simple as that just not breathe i wouldn't want breathe i would want breathe because i don't know anything i would need breathe but you know i did forget to breathe i've been hit a lot oh thank you i got you know what i i've been so terrified i've been picking face all day that is a good yeah yeah i would anyway so then the next is rose versus what is that chinese chick's name wang li or something wayley wayley dude i'm z-h-a-n-z-a-n-g um yeah they're it's funny it's so close i think they've had a fight go each way they're one and one this is the trilogy fight i think no and am i mixing it up with it to someone else i believe they've only fought once and rose knocked her out

uh because here's the way i remember it let's see if i can stone string this together andrage dropped rose on her head so then she was what it is and then andrage got destroyed maybe by um the chinese girl and and then the chinese girl beat the fuck out of joanna um yon jay check and then Rose knocked her out. Those are the fights that I remember. That sounds right. Also, Rose beat Andrade too. I have it in front of me now.

But yeah, I mixed up. I thought it was the Chinese Qigzhang, something like that, that dropped Rose on her head, but it wasn't. I had it wrong. Yeah, that was Andrade. Yeah.

Who was going to beat me outclassed before that it's this is a situation where i don't think there should have been an instant rematch rose just beat this woman she got the title um but this woman's from china which is a market that's very important to the ufc They would love to get all those Chinese viewers. They're giving her a shot at the champ right again. I disagree with you. I felt like this was a time for an immediate rematch, but I didn't want it

to be. We're the same in this regard. We're always worried about Rose. We're always afraid for Rose. We don't know how she can win. And then she does. And when I'm watching her fight, I'm surprised every time

by just how good she is. Because I'm not exaggerating when I say this. She's top two or three best fighters in the UFC, I think. Just her movement. No, human three best fighters in the ufc i think like like just her movement and no human beings who fight okay i think rose is i think she's in the top two or three like like because every time i watch her fight it's masterful it's masterful i don't i've never seen her commit a mistake the only thing she ever did was when she was destroying andrage

obviously like she let herself get picked up and dropped on her head that's the only mistake i've ever seen her make other otherwise she's just maintaining perfect distance and just looking incredible is she the third best woman ever i've got um who's the big strong one who's just wrecking everyone well there's amanda nunez there's there's there's there's there's the big strong one who's just wrecking everyone? Well, there's Amanda Nunez. There's Valentina Shevchenko and there's Rose Nama Yunus. And they just happen to be your three current champions right now across four divisions. And I don't know which one is more talented. I lean towards Shevchenko or Rose though,

because I think Nunez, like big thing is her power. She's just got so much knockout power for 135. She beat Cyborg. At 145, she beat Cyborg. Yeah, it's a ton of power. Cyborg can barely make 145. Anyway, UFC 268 is coming.

I'm totally psyched. It's one of the Super Bowl events. Chandler's fighting Gaethje. Love Gaethje. I love both of those guys. um chandler's fighting uh gaechi like that's love gaechi oh i love gaechi's the main event agreed well i don't know if you've seen enough chandler but you'd like him he does a really good interview he's smart he's clever um i'm sure i have i can't picture him in my in my head right now but i'm sure i have yeah you'll probably get exposed to him again after this weekend and be like oh i don I like that guy.

He's good. He's one of the people I want on my team. Yeah, I've watched every card for, I don't know how long now, maybe since prison, but I'm going to watch this one one way or another, even if I've got to go to a bar out here or something. But I'm looking forward to it. It's a good one. Then Frankie Edgar fights

Marlon Vera. Holy shit. Yeah, it's a wild card. So yeah, sorry iflon Vera. Holy shit. It's a wild card. Sorry if that bored any of you non-UFC people. Seriously, I say this occasionally, maybe three times a year. This is that card where you're going to be exposed if you spend

your $70 to some of the best of the best across multiple divisions fighting against good uh competition and joe rogan is going to be back for the first time since conor mcgregor fought so uh it's a good time to come back that's an interesting thing with rogan he um to me rogan was the most important employee at the ufc i mean obviously dana white but like maybe more important than

any single fighter. He was the voice of it when he's like, Oh, he got rocked and stuff. I'm like, man, I, I feel like Rogan is, is this essential to this thing as anybody that's changed for me now? Yeah, he does fine. But there are other people who do that job well too. Um, here's what I wish because he's very important for me. I'm very glad that he's coming back. It hasn't been the same without him. I need him there. I wish he had a show.

I feel like he's got so much money, he doesn't have to do anything. But man, I wish he had some sort of ESPN show. I wish he was behind a fucking desk for an hour every night, like five nights a week, like talking UFC, like just this pure UFC show. I don't know if there's enough content for that. There's so much content for that. There's two other shows that do that.

That talk UFC an hour a day? Michael Bisping has that show, right where it's on espn i think and i think so does um um the fucking um chael chael's got a show i knew that chael had a show i don't know i never see it and the rare times i get exposed to it he says that he like repeats everything on his youtube channel that's that's channel. I'm sure that's all true. I haven't seen it either. I just know he has a show. I don't watch ESPN.

Anyway, I feel like I've indulged too long. Yeah, too long. But yeah, it's a good weekend to watch the fights. So, wedoc.com is not really a website. Someone owned it, squatted it, and didn't set up a website. Oh, you got to suck my dick. dick yeah so does my dick get sucked for that or not i'm curious i wasn't talking to you when i said it i was a teller exclusive um i'll only suck it if his wife watches how else did you think we're gonna do this perfect now but i'm all about the yin and the yang. I get to suck your dick. And if the viewers are interested in that,

is that a Patreon thing? Yeah, you could zoot right here. Nice little three-hour event. Hey, if we make this a five-hour show, we can do it on the show. Five hours? I don't know about that. I love Woody's face coming to the realization of like,

wait, no, don't suck his dick. You can suck his dick, you just can't put him on my channel. What do you think about that? Oh, that's your concern? Is that a strike? How does that work? Not a copyright strike. They gave you one strike for a blowjob. It is in fact Kyle's dick in Teller's mouth.

Oh, wait, other way around. We're going to do both. I'm definitely coming now. It is, in fact, Kyle's dick in Teller's mouth. Oh, wait, other way around. Sorry. We're going to do both. Oh, okay. I'm definitely coming now. We're like, it's just the joke completely falls flat. Like, you're actively sucking my dick, looking up like, ha, ha, ha. Can you imagine? How far we brought it.

Can you imagine if I wasn't doing this jokingly and we're like high-fiving? It's like that old 4chan green check. I mean, surely this is part of your long-term running ad for the load enhancer here, right? This comes out there somewhere. I don't want to ruin my keyboard. This is how you get this here.

This is your moment to break into the mortar and what is it? mortar and what is it fucking physical building market yeah no no no Kyle's push for what it's in a store brick and mortar brick and mortar this is your this is your moment to break in we could we'll show well I know

CVS have you seen this video of my co-hosts and I giving each other head so like well I mean you did bring a gun to the meeting, so I guess we're going to watch it. Can we do that standing 69 thing?

Do you think you're strong enough to hoist me? Yeah, definitely. I know you're strong enough to remain hoisted. Yeah, I'll lock around. I'm not going to lay there limp. I'm locking in. And after we're done done we'll go get a nice workout in and i think that's gonna be the workout that will be you can add yeah i feel like it's pull day for one of you and push day for the

my wife like gets home like that's not what it looks like it's really because it looks like you and your dog cast friend are giving each other head my dogs are in their kennel looking like that this time we didn't do it but that guy we're around constantly is

giving head in the other room then the pieces fall into place she leaves you okay and then you and i go and and who was that rapper who had the house married no who was that the rapper who had the house for sale near you oh it was like jay-z nelly yeah nelly nelly was selling this mansion that he owned near ish taylor and i was, you know, Taylor, if you weren't getting married, I'm about to get off probation. I can do some crazy.

You and I could have bought Nelly's mansion and we could have, we could have streamed from Nelly's mansion and, and done silly shit there. And he was like, Hey, Taylor literally went, Taylor literally went, Oh,

don't say that. Cause that sounds so cool. It does. It sounded cool as shit until I did a little more digging on the Nelly mansion and was like, oh, there's a reason this is 600 grand. They could use it as a post-apocalyptic set. It's that level of dilapidation. It's collapsing.

The basketball court looks like an earthquake happened there. There's a giant crack through it that you could fall into. If you're dealing with that, just lower your standards. Just tremendously low. The house is in the middle of the woods. It turns out Nellie is a scumbag. In some parts

of our house, the inside and outside are not separated. But outside of that, it's a cool place. Yeah. The indoor pool is technically the outdoor pool. It's an indoor-outdoor pool because of the lack of roof. Because we don't believe in windows here. We want to live side by side.

And I would totally get you on the steroids as my husband. Yes. Yes. You wouldn't have to maintain your fertility with Kyle. No. That's true. That's true. We could both just get juice to the gills. That'd be great.

Like weird big. Like Jake Cutler off-season big. Yes. I know what that looks like. Like where the abs are showing even though you're overweight that level of muscle. Zach, pull up Jay Cutler off-season.

I need to see this photo because I don't know how jacked Jay Cutler is in the off-season. It's not a desirable body in my... No, no, it's very undesirable. It's a real freakazoid type situation. Oh, this is the all right zach i found the picture for you to show here i'll demonstrate my copy paste skills yes just get your pedals we hold hands in every grocery store we go to this is jake jake cutler was um mr olympia so

the number one top bodybuilder in the world for a while. Can you zoom in on him? Look at this guy. This is his off-season physique. He's huge. Is that real? This is a real photo? It's a real photo. It's a real photo.

He looks like the cave troll in the first Lord of the rings what you have to keep in mind what you have to keep in mind his head may look a little bit small there his head is so big dude if i wasn't worried about getting my ass kicked i honestly believe i could steal jay cutler's girlfriend oh he, he'd eat you. You know what's funny?

I think that... Is that a mass gainer in front of him? Is that pro-mass? Like he's not to the end of the road yet? I think it is. I think it is. I think he's eating oatmeal.

I'm going to use Jay Like Cutler picture just to Show people what he's supposed to look like That guy's that guy that is a powerful build Right there yeah Like in his prime or something Like we would just walk around like that Just like just bloat Max yeah we would never cut

So it'd be So it'd be a huge life change for me Permabulk yeah cut. So it'd be a huge life change for me. Permabulk. Yeah, we just get huge just like that. So Taylor, what's the biggest change since you married your friend Kyle? Well, no more cardio. I'll tell you that right now. As a matter of fact, we both quit

cardio. Kyle likes me bulky. Kyle likes me to feel soft. He says if I put enough weight on it'll fix that dent in my ass oh no yeah oh no well that guy I cannot believe that's a real photo but now looking at him like in competition form yeah that that's totally believable because this guy is inhumanly big. Maybe it's a weird curiosity, but when someone's that big and they're pushing things to the limit like that, I'm curious about the little things in their life.

How big of a shit does that guy take? Probably enormous. Hopefully Google can't solve that for us. I kind of want to see it. What is can't solve that for us. I kind of want to see it. What is he doing there? Is he crushing a normal man? It's part of his posing routine, and it actually works.

Most people just show off their thigh muscle. He invented the Jay Cutler stomp. So before he posed his thigh, he'd stomp his heel into the ground and then flex it. And it was an impressive display. Jay Cutler is the... There's a saying in bodybuilding,

nobody wants to fuck Jay Cutler. I didn't make that up right now. I've heard that many times. Nobody wants to have sex with him? Yes. The whole point of it is that like you can't stop you can go too far yeah yeah kind of to me the end game is kind of where kyle's

pictures were like that like that's for sure that's where you aspire to go to um but that guy has to get there right because like i'm looking at him on stage like everybody else is going to the fucking limit too and so it's like a like a cold war he has a different goal he's trying to win bodybuilding contests he's not trying to win tinder and no one wants to fuck jay cutler now that it's also like careful you don't want to get too strong like no what i don't have to be careful about that that's not gonna happen to me like i'm not in danger to look like that guy what happened to him didn't happen accidentally no no that was a huge amount of effort like you see a burn victim and you're like yeah be careful around propane ovens but

you see jay cutler and you're like don't worry about it man that'll never happen to you yeah you can pick up everything in this gym and that won't happen to you. Is Jay Cutler, is he not competing anymore? Because I just looked up. Yeah, he's aged out. Oh, okay. Because Mr. Olympia from last year, who is this big Ramy. Rainy Ramy.

Yeah. Big Ramy. This guy, he's still a monster, but he is noticeably smaller than Jay Cutler. I need to see him next to each other. I'm not sure. I think Big Ramy is actually jay cutler i need to see him next to each other i'm not sure i think next to a normal person actually really big i'd like to see because it's really hard like just the shot of them to get any sense of perspective sometimes he's really bulked out bodybuilders or five nine you know so when big rami comes there and maybe in the picture doesn't

look bigger than you realize he's like six four, four. It's a different thing. Yeah. Yeah. Looking at them next to each other. They're, they're both equally big. All right. I wouldn't even know what to critique on there. Who's not that Lou Ferengo. I thought that guy was huge.

He played the incredible Hawk. So in my mind, he played an incredible Hawk when I was a kid. And in my mind, he was just a ginormous person. His muscles are huge, but I think he's pretty short how am i wrong about that you might be right because i mean they use shorter guys like that to look huge oh he's six five i'm oh fuck oh never mind i fucked that up entirely jesus i don't know who i'm thinking of i'm thinking of

something the wrong guy well six five uh maybe uh the colombo guy like arnold's friend because maybe i am he was short and he was more powerful than arnold in every lift i believe huh i mean yeah lou lou farigno he looks he's huge in these old hulk things it's just i think painting your entire body green it's not flattering like there's nothing i feel like it's getting rid of a lot of a lot of the good lighting and angles that they use like he just almost looks doughy and then you get close and it's like no those are they're visible abs under that green paint well have you ever seen pumping iron no i've never seen that wait you've never seen pumping iron taylor uh do you know what it

is that's that's schwarzenegger's movie okay so taylor pumping iron is a documentary about arnold schwarzenegger trying to win his fourth Mr. Olympia in a row or something like that. And it's the lead up to it. And the idea is that he's pit against Lou Ferrigno. And so they go and they cover Lou Ferrigno and his training with his father. They cover Arnold and his whole shtick. And then it culminates.

And then they also cover bodybuilding as a sport and talk about like the deal with it and um then it culminates with the mr olympia pageant i believe it was it could have been a universe or something but i think it was olympia and there's this one part where it's like maybe the day before or it's at least maybe it's the friday and the thing is going to be on sund, but the contestants are there in wherever the fuck. And Arnold is having lunch with Lou Ferrigno and Lou Ferrigno's father. And what you have to keep in mind is

Lou Ferrigno is deaf, and he reads lips, but he's not very verbal. I didn't know that. Especially back then when he was younger. He struggles, and he was embarrassed by it arnold on the other hand has been taking acting classes and learning english like like for a couple years now

and he's as you know he's arnold schwarzenegger he's he's a pretty slick guy and he's sitting there he says something like you know and he's eating like his salad or whatever while he says this he's like man you look tremendous lou you look tremendous you must have been working so hard so hard it's a shame it's a shame if you just had three maybe four months to peak you could you could have done something this year you know you know you're you're close you're close three or four more months and you'd have been there like he's saying he's saying this and lou is like kind of picking it up and lou's father is just like you motherfucker make a scene and lou lou can't say anything because he's incapable of defending himself in like a verbal argument so it's it's it's arnold schwarzenegger comes off like an asshole he bullies everybody he bullies people in the gym

during training he bullies people before the gym during training. He bullies people before the competition. He wins the competition and is still incapable of extending any grace. Even after he wins, he's just like, you could say the alpha in everyone, but that sounds cool. It didn't come off cool to me. It came off as foolish. Yeah. yeah like he came off to me as someone who had worked so hard for so long and believed while they were doing the work that they were the best and then they got there and all of their hopes and dreams had been affirmed and then he literally is wearing a shirt that says arnold is numero uno and he's smoking a joint and he's just going yeah he's just like like it just looks

like he's he is the epitome of a winner like like he's like he's done it right like like he's he spent the last year working toward this thing and he's like head and shoulders better than everybody else it really isn't even close and he's a genetic freak and and the bullying thing i don't see it as like high school bullying like for the sake of being cruel i see it as him trying to get a mental edge on a mentally weak opponent yeah although you might you might argue the ethics of that and whether or not that's a reasonable way to approach that but that's also how it came off that's the picture it's like manipulating an opponent manipulating an opponent it'd be easier for me to to agree with that narrative if that was when he did it but no he would like his training

partners he was an asshole to the whole time it's true like he's always just better than you better than you better than you and i wonder if this is the whole persona you guys were talking about moments ago with the uh the ufc stuff like talking about like the game they're spitting versus the social media image versus what they believe kind of deal isn't that just this yeah i i have so i see your point um this wasn't hard time describing why some people do it and they come off as like assholes or cringe or whatever. And other people do it. And I'm like, this is a hell of a show.

I want to watch more. But there's a very fine line, right? Like between being offensive and being like entertaining. Yeah. Or I don't know. Like I have seen people do this jerk thing with a little bit of a wink. Like, you know, I'm playing a character here. If you really think the ref was distracted and I hit this person with the steel chair, then you're a fool and I can't be responsible for your level of stupidity.

But this is the gimmick and we're having a good time here. I enjoy that. But with Schwarzenegegger it didn't seem like that it seemed like this was his honest and sincere bullying of the people around him yeah i have no dog i have no dog in that fight in the sense of like i don't know anything about honor schwarzenegger particularly or care one way or the other really but uh when i saw that documentary that was the kind of vibe i got was like this is a person attempting to manipulate an opponent so yeah that's what i got his workout partners yeah and who knows who knows what that is part of that might be like the it might be a fragile

ego thing or it might literally be like this is how you got to think about it to fucking like that's the headspace he needs to be in all the time to make this win who knows i don't know maybe that level of tea i mean maybe he's pushing his training partners for all i know i don't know yeah i do know that you do need to watch that movie though taylor it's yeah i'll check it out this is really interesting i'm looking at and it's him and his prime media like it's maybe you can watch that while you're watching dune yeah yeah well i'm watching that calcum catch up on dune i might actually watch dune tonight i hope you like it because i know you've been wanting to to like it i think i will like it i won't love it um it's pretty good wanting to like it. I think I will like it. I won't love it.

It's a pretty good environment to watch it in right now. It's so quiet here. I can say it now because I'll be gone in the morning, but I'm on this lake. And I think it's like a vacation spot here in Southern Illinois, but for the summer, obviously. So no one else is here. So there's no one here on this big finger that like goes out into a lake

and i i mean if i scream for help outside there's no one here um there's there's no one anywhere near me like miles away like there's houses but no one's in them because they're all like vacation houses sometimes it's neat to take an off season. We're going to the beach. My family in a time that's coming up, but I'm not telling everyone in advance and it'll be cold. And it's like, I did it last year twice when my friend got those places and I really enjoyed it.

You know, just maybe fly my paramotor from the beach, hand out some tandem rides, do whatever. Yeah, that'll be fun. No, I've, I've often done that. Um, motor from the beach hand out some tandem rides do whatever yeah that'll be fun no i i've i've often done that um i think a lot of people like going up to like gatlinburg when the leaves are

changing but i usually go up there when it's like snowing or something like that like i don't know i like little little winter vacations and i i've always liked being really spontaneous i'm so glad glad my fucking probation is over and i can do that more because like sometimes i'll just be up late and like see a commercial or something and be like hey i want to go there and i used to just do that and the last couple years it's been locked down but it was fun to just get in the car and go and with this job you can do it like if you remember your laptop yeah we said this on pka and i guess i'll catch pka up a little bit so like i decided to go to illinois at midnight with no prior thoughts of going to illinois i was just like hey i want to go to illinois i'm gonna do it packed my bags in 10 minutes got in the car

left and uh drove seven hours in the middle of the night. I got here when the sun was coming up. And I packed everything in those 10 minutes. microphone, lighting, cameras, all the wiring, extension cords, all my toiletries, everything I could need. I even brought sodas. I was like, you always stay somewhere you need soda or whatever you're going to drink. I brought two 12-packs of soda so I wouldn't have to stop at a store. I left my laptop, my brand new laptop that was bought for trips like this i left it sitting on the couch i brought the charger left the laptop well you're halfway there i know so i went to walmart yesterday and i bought a 200 laptop and that was being real sketchy so i thought that maybe it was the performance of the laptop so i I bought a $500 laptop today and it is still real bad. So either $500 laptops still aren't good enough or it's the internet

connection. I don't know, but I'll be back home the next time we record anything. So for now, until you find another commercial plan at two in the evening and visit New Hampshire, I think I will. I mean, it was a particularly effective marketing campaign that really nails Kyle. commercial plan at two in the morning and visit new hampshire i think i will i mean

it was a particularly effective marketing campaign that really nails kyle like it uh it honestly wasn't the weed um but but um the uh it was this sort of happenstance the um but where i am now, though, I was thinking like, I'm already here. I almost didn't, like last, whenever I visited you that time, Woody, like years and years ago when you were at the Apex house, I remember I left

your house and I was like, you know, I'm in North Carolina. I got friends like in Pennsylvania. Maybe I'll just drive all the way to Pennsylvania. And I like... Did we like come from Boston. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh no, not that time. The time when you were, um, when, uh, when I stayed a couple of days and we watched like the UFC fights and we did like a laser tag.

Oh yeah. I remember that. Yeah. That trip. Um, like when I left your house, I, I,

I actually considered like continuing a little silly trip and just driving to Pennsylvania and hanging out with some friends up there. I'm already in Illinois. Where could I go to from here? Well, what's on your docket? Yes, St. Louis. Visit St.

Louis. Look at all the sites. You can see the crime. You could go up into Minnesota and see the true cold. Oh, I can see Middy. Middy's up in Minnesota. Yeah. I'm trying to get us to do some

kind of PKA meetup episode that they've been clamoring for. If we want to do a PKA meetup, let's make it fun. Yeah, let's go lazy. First of all, here's what we should do with our PK meetup.

One, not plan it here. Two, we should make it an event where, I don't mean an event where others join, but where we're going to do a thing. Make one of Woody's type two fun memories and i'll slash your tires but no more camp i was gonna slash your tires oh thank you then we're all in the rental giving

and receiving bka huh yeah um and uh and just do it that way because i'd like to like i don't know i'd like to do a thing yeah that would be fun i don't know what i did for you all your freedom now like you can just pick up and do whatever i because i've been watching cause a very close friend of mine watching him get anxious and like not be able to do shit and to be able to just 1 a.m fuck it i'm driving across the country like that's great i'm so glad that wasn't longer than two years jesus can you imagine if it was like four years i think it was i think it could have been five have you really been out for two years kyle uh yeah how long is probation yeah wow it does feel like longer than that no it feels like your prison stay was more recent i said it backwards yeah

yeah yeah no i followed 25 it's been 25 months almost to the day holy shit yeah 25 months yeah it seems recent to me too i've still got my uh talladega federal prison camp uh pin my my give you give you a pin yeah no it's a writing utensil right yeah yeah oh that was like a pin like you know you got one for the shop like a badge i still got my pan gotcha no um yeah it seems recent to me too um so yeah i'm glad that's that's fucking over but yeah i believe that i could have been sentenced to six months in prison and five years of probation fucking hell yeah well if you decide to hang out in southern illinois any longer and you want another three hours on your trip, let me know.

I'll let you know. You can say hello. We can get the bows out. We can get the bows out. My dogs can bark at you. They'll be so afraid. It took me a while to come back when I went to the bathroom earlier because I went out there and Fozzie has been like having this weird breathing thing. He gets so excited. He starts hyperventilating and so i went out there

and he was like so excited to see me because my wife's at home right now and so he just started wagging his tail and he starts going like not able to and i'm like fuzzy it's okay it's okay but it's okay are you gonna kill your dog by the fact your dog likes you i mean maybe i hope not we actually we have him set up to go to the vet. Is this like an intro to animal abuse? We're taking him to the vet on Saturday because every time he gets stoked, he's having trouble breathing as much as he wants. And I don't know what it could be because the other dog's fine. He's too happy.

They need to give him the opposite of those SRIs, just some sort of depression pills. You know what I would do if I was at Taylor's house? I think I'd hit the Taylor gym. It's a high quality gym. It's a very good gym. The Taylor gym. It's a bunch of... Compared to Woody's, it is dirtier

because it's all unfinished. Woody's is all nice, crisp, clean. I like that about it. I do have a lot more space down there, though. I was thinking the other day, maybe I'll just put up drywall. Not finish the whole thing, just drywall down there, make it look cleaner. And I was like, am I going to

shoot up in the hockey area at drywall? Fuck no. Yes. I'll put holes in it. And that could take hours to fix every three years. Like, no big deal. It would look like such garbage, because I have one of those, like,

you know, insulation foil things, like, that's like foil and foam or something. And it's behind the hockey area. And it is just chewed to shit after just a cut. Because between most sets, I'll go and, like, grab a couple pucks and shoot, and then go back to working out. What if you put up drywall with netting that that could work actually yeah put up some netting

okay all right solution i was trying to think i'm like find a way to poke a hole in it so it doesn't seem like so it seems like you've thought of this but i have not thought of it makes a lot of sense because it um i don't know it's not just the fact that it's dry walled which looks nice but like the lighting and the mood sort of brightens up like it to me a poorly lit basement is a depression chamber but uh a really finished basement with some drywall and stuff is a pleasant place to exist now it may have been poorly lit in the past like i was gonna get those those shop lights at first a couple years ago like those big long shop lights then i looked around on amazon for like those led just screwing things where you can fold like a butterfly like the the lighting does that make sense so you just you screw it in and then it's got a bunch of led panels that all are flat so there's like imagine like a flower there's like five petals each one has

three and then you can kind of fold them around they screw into a regular light bulb thing but then there's a bunch it's almost like a tiny ceiling fan with the little wings yeah and for like the first two years i used these ones i just first one on amazon it's more of like a yellow light that you would see in a room like a normal room and just like two months ago i was like i really wanted to be bright as hell in here and like really not thinking went and found those same things and i was like absolute brightest fucking one i got four of them because i need i need four to cover my whole basement area and it genuinely took like two days of working out down there before i was used to the brand like the huge amount i like i was like benching inclined benching and the thing

was so bright i was like oh good like i had to look away from it but oh no i can't do that i i fixed it now so it's not as intense but it's uh i didn't it's way better lighting now if i didn't think it would make me look like a complete asshole i would wear my sunglasses in the gym like like when i'm there during the daytime like like i would absolutely wear them yeah you you think it would make me look like a complete asshole, I would wear my sunglasses in the gym. Like when I'm there during the daytime. Really? I never wear sunglasses. My gym could be better lit. It has a really big window, so it's typically lit when I work out. But if it's ever night, which is coming sooner, it's too dim.

Yeah. I have some windows in mine, but it's a basement gym and so it's only certain times that like those big long windows are actually getting light anyway but yeah it's it is i'll say uncomfortably bright if i turn this like all the way up and i leave them all on but i'm used to it now it's nice yeah but yeah the the gym if if, if either of you are ever here, have to get a workout in. We're not doing the same days. Two people are not doing pole day at the same time. We want no lines. No lines. Okay.

Pole, push, legs. I'm almost on the other team. Like, oh, man, I guess I have to rest while you go. It sucks, doesn't it but your rest can be going into the hockey area shooting some pucks at the the targets in the corners seeing if you can pick one every once in a while put a hole in that wall yeah put a hole there's so many it won't even matter but every like i'm not good enough to like just put it in the top corner every time because there's a bag in each of the top corners where you fire it into and if you score obviously it goes in there but like every once in a while just like coming off a bench i'll like first one like whip it and it just right

in there and every time that happens i'm just like it's not getting better than that let's put the stick back and go back to lifting other times i'll be i'll get like all fucking 35 of those orange pucks i have i'll be like all right you'll do your next set when you can hit one in both in a row and like half an hour will pass and it's like you just need to get back into it if it were gonna happen it would happen by now i love that little like addition to my gym the little hockey area it's just such a fun little thing to have and when like if people come over and i have like a party and someone gets drunk enough that they want to put on the goalie stuff

that's great then you can really hurt them and it's their own fault right well i'd see that's i've learned this because i played hockey my whole life growing up street hockey basement hockey everything you if someone volunteers to be a goalie you do not hammer them you don't fuck with them you don't try and dangle them at least not for the first like hour you build confidence you make them think they're doing very well you make them want to stay in goal give them a couple satisfying saves because if you just shell someone who's not used to playing goalie and they catch a puck on like the underside of their arm and they're bruising they're gonna say this is the worst position in the sport. I quit. And it is.

It is. It is absolutely the worst position in the sport. If I could go back as a kid, I would have said no to being goalie and played out instead. I was always jealous of how much more fun it seemed they were having. And of course, you put your own thought process in it. But I was playing for a pretty elite, good team. And I remember I'd see a friend of mine, a forward, give up the puck. Give a turnover in the neutral zone. And he just skates right off.

And it's like, that guy just fucked up big time. But nobody knows. He's just another guy on the bench. Me, though, I have to stand there the whole time. And so if I try and get a puck and it bounces over and I look like an idiot, I just have to stand there game i have to stand there the whole time and so if i like try and get a puck and it bounces over and i look like an idiot i just have to stand there and like get made fun of by people oh man yeah i didn't realize until i tried goalie how hard it is to handle the puck yeah like dude so the one of the lower like beer league levels is the C-League level.

If you were going to play hockey for the first time, right? You're 33 years old and you decide you want to play hockey. You enter in the C-League. There are guys in the C-League who absolutely handle the puck as well as NHL goalies. Like most guys in the C-League are as good at puck handling as the NHL goalies. And I'm like, why are they so awful? Why are they like awful why why are they like practice a little you dick and then i tried it with a goalie glove and a blocker

and that ridiculous unwieldy heavy stick it's hard yeah it's hard it makes you look incompetent like even in the nhl there's like three goalies maybe two who when they come out to play the puck you're like all right i'm they'll probably do okay but for the most part like if it's a goalie from europe and they leave the net every player in the nhl because you know they do they do tech just like any sport where they're like shoot high on this goalie do this do that when like mark andre flurry comes out of the net to play the puck you can see the team he's playing against get more excited because he's he's so apt to fumble it and fuck it up or get hit by someone on accident one of his own teammates or misplay you're right it's it's like almost an archaic thing in hockey to even have the goalie come out unless it's like

an easy setup but when they come out and like they're already in the ozone it doesn't make any goddamn sense like they need to drop that. But anyway, hockey, hockey, Carolina Hurricanes undefeated nine and oh, two more wins. And they take, I think, sole possession of the longest win streak to start a season ever. That'll be 11. Yeah, they are right now the best hockey team who have ever played. There's never been a team go undefeated. And there's never even heard of them.

Thus far, no one has proven they can beat the hurricanes that's true and they've beaten world beaters like chicago phoenix like all of those tight but they are genuinely super good i i was listening to uh it may have been the hockey guy or some hockey podcast steve dangle. I don't know which one, but they were talking about how they could see, like based on how the season's folding out a blues verse Carolina Stanley cup because the blues are looking very good. And so are the hurricanes. And that's not a matchup I'd want to take right now because the hurricanes,

I think are just, they're just better. Yeah. We'll take a over the hill. Tara Sanko, one arm, good old lefty. See how well he can still shoot. You know what's funny? He's having a tremendous season. He hasn't faced us yet.

That's true. That's true. But I love your just like go-to sports things. Like that guy, fucking piece of shit. He's having a wonderful breakout season. Even so. Who cares? speaking of sports i was just thinking woody i don't know this because i don't know much about you totally honestly are you a big hockey

fan because this is the first time i heard you ever mention hockey is this are you one of these guys who's like my team's doing well so i'm like fucking all in for it kind of definitely that latter guy i have been a big hockey fan before um and i played it for about 10 12 years or something but uh i'm not keeping up with it lately yeah you don't really follow sports too much at all filthy right no no i might be doing um what were you calling it c level i think whatever i think i'm probably gonna be starting some f level soccer this year this year i'm gonna do a men's team in the or uh not a men's team co-ed team in this area just to get out of the fucking house and enjoy your future injuries i can tell you as a fellow grown-up who walks into sports like that i

yeah so i'm mostly doing it for the beers and the social honestly but um if i have to i guess i'll deal with it. My youngest brother, he's way too young to be getting hurt in sports. He was living in Chicago a while ago and he was like, yeah, I'm doing this indoor sports league just for the same reason you said. I want to get out. I want to be able to see people. One of the first games, he wore cleats in indoor soccer and sprained. They thought he tore his AC out because you're obviously not

supposed to wear cleats in indoor soccer like there's no I didn't know that special indoor cleats right you are supposed to wear indoor cleats whatever the normal kind of cleats are that have too much grip and I think he tried to go fucking buy some oh well make sure you buy the right ones because he

was apparently not and he's like like, yeah, it was terrible. It's a huge loud pop. And then I went home. And then that night he's like, and I was laying in bed saying like, you can fall asleep. Just just fall asleep. And he's like, and he's like, no, he had to like call an Uber to take him to the hospital. He was in so much pain. Wow.

He's better now. They thought it was a full ACL pop, but it was some like middle of the road one. He's all better now. But yeah. Good. acl pop but it was some like middle of the road one he's all better now but yeah good good yeah that that sounds ideal then yeah i do just what i'll aim for too yeah are you you need to go really try hard yeah established and i'm gonna i'm gonna treat it like i'm playing a video game right like so i'll just be yelling like aggressively at the opposition like they can't hear me i'll just act like i'm just alone in a room shouting to a camera i'll be perfect filthy drop pass don't you what the fuck was that are you kidding me look at this shit you know like when my teammate you know who's also going to be some like you know just random person who hasn't

played sports in 20 years kind of the old passes the ball and misses it i'm sure that'll go over well i can't wait oh yeah you're mad at them giving you like coaching tips from the bench yeah my friend sprained his ankle zach can you share this picture with everyone this is the worst sprained ankle i've ever seen in my life oh that does not look good no people say broken bones are broken bones are not really that big a deal. Sprains. Oh my God. Okay, I'm glad we're all on the same page. I'm like, wow, they're taking this real well. He's like bending an arm and someone photoshopped a foot on there.

It's a sprained ankle. It was actually non-surgical. What the deal was is most of the time they would operate on that and they're like you know what there's a new way to address this do you want to try like an experimental thing and he had really good results he's fine now he heard it mountain climbing oh my god it's amazing that he would say yes to that because they'd be like hey we'll get this really experimental technique for something that's been happening to most of human for humankind for thousands of years would you like to be that and i'd be like like, no, I'll go with the

traditional treatment for this. All right, we'll walk it off. What if they cut his feet off and put some skateboards down there or something? All right, let me know how it goes. We're giving you the We're trying something new. We're giving you the same legs that

South African murderer had. Oh yeah, the blade dude. Pistorius? P. Oh, yeah. The Blade Dude. Pistorius? Pistorius, yeah. Oscar Pistorius. The Blade Runner. What a cool fucking nickname, man. Man, I hope he's out of jail. See those...

Same thought. Murderer. Was he a murderer? Maybe I made that up. Yeah, he killed his girlfriend. He killed his girlfriend oh yeah girlfriend through the bathroom door does that shot her shot her yeah oh that's mean it says height five foot two in stumps oh that's that's what it says it says five foot two and then in parentheses in stumps and yeah i guess you can choose your height when you're the blade runner you're like seven and a half feet tall.

In stilts. Let's see. When's he getting out? Five years in prison. He should be out two years ago. Oh, shit. Let's get the Blade Runner on here. Oh, no.

His sentence has since been increased to 15 years as of November 2017, but eligible for parole in 2023. Hey, PKA 800, let's go. You go to prison as a fairly innocent, careful murderer, and then while you're in prison, they turn you into an actual

criminal. Yeah. They're like, every day they're stealing his... Oh, so there's no way they're giving him blade legs in jail He's probably on stilts Yeah or just in a wheelchair He would use the blade legs To jump the fence

No someone would beat his ass Take the blade legs and make a grope They wouldn't have to have shivs anymore They'd have a full scimitar No he would just be doing cartwheels Like cutting people's heads off He's an Olympic athlete Cartwheels? Yeah cartwheels

How? With his fucking magic Olympic legs I thought he was using those to cut people's heads off He is That's why he's inverted No no he's doing cartwheels He's putting his feet at head level And just becoming a rotating blade.

He's the blender. I feel so stupid for not getting it. It was really deep and really good. It was really deep and very deep, very good. Everyone's talking about it. Yeah, that guy, you know, I don't care for him.

Oscar Pistorius. I think he did something wrong. He's a bit of a ruffian. A no-good Nick. A ne'er-do-well. You guys see the Twitch hack? Twitch? Oh, yeah!

Is this from a while ago? The coolest part was they exposed everybody's earnings. I mean, I don't mean a big time, you guys, but I'm like the 8,400th largest earner on Twitch. Nice. Which is hilarious in some sense, right? Because there's 8 million.

They were like, I think for that period, there were 8 million people who streamed on Twitch during that time. Oh, I actually thought that was a really low, bad number. But I forget Taylor's rank, but he was higher than me and i didn't look you up filthy i'm sure you're hires i don't know i think i was i was like 3700 or something like that okay no idea i didn't look into it yeah i guess well i want to know now zach what was i it might have been too old for you oh it was just the last yeah it wasn't it wasn't like particularly comprehensive because it was you know the last like i think it was just the last yeah it wasn't it wasn't like particularly comprehensive because it was

you know the last like i think it was like 18 months or something maybe longer maybe it was longer than that it was 27 i can't remember i didn't even look into what it was it was just the twitch portion of that too but it might have ended before you got there kyle and um also it was about subscriptions and ads it didn't cover donations which um for sponsors oh no those guys were only making a hundred thousand dollars a month a lot of my revenue comes from the text to speech like it's probably the most profitable part of my stream people ask me questions and i answer yeah and uh that's kind of like i think this is why people would watch me they would ask questions and i would answer and that was like

they're not there to see me play Escape from Tarkov. Yeah. Why are you doing that, Woody? I don't know any better. I enjoy the game. Yeah, so anyway, the earnings didn't include that and that was a lot. For me, it was probably better than subs.

Did anything ever happen about the leak? Filthy just kind of went away. You hear some stuff from some small partners, not getting income from this in some way. But, and YouTube finally implemented all the features they don't have because they got the source code to Twitch. Yeah.

And I mean, it was the whole source code leaked. So I'm not, I'm not expecting that to be totally done yet i think we'll find some exciting easter eggs later um what could they find in there i don't even know there were like golden kappas that were given to like certain people they made it seem like it was random but it was hard coded in that was some stuff to like certain partners hitting like uh essentially like immune to ban requests kind of deal. You'd have to go through

essentially their Twitch interactive... Twitch personnel, Twitch agents, whatever you want to call it. Legit. I remember I think you couldn't just... Back in the day on YouTube, you couldn't community strike people. You were immune to strikes, even copyright strikes if you were a certain class of channel. And it sounds like, oh, it's rigged for the big guy. Maybe so. It is, but for a reason. Exactly. If you're a PewDiePie or something, there's probably a

million haters every video who want to fuss and you have to protect him from false claims yeah i think the biggest the biggest interesting part for me was how few people are making it on twitch from that and like because you know like so i see that number and i can see the number that's leaked for my income off that right and i can go okay well that's you know i know i know what my income is from all of my revenue sources as opposed to just twitch for example example. So then to see that in perspective and be like, okay, well, I'm making this amount of money and I see myself as this successful

or like this amount of making it kind of deal in life kind of deal. And then like to think like, well, but I'm like the 99.99 percentile of people streaming on Twitch. And granted, probably most of these people are not attempting to make a living of it. But even from like partners,

you're just like, holy shit. So a part of me goes, hey, well, you know, the you know, we knew the top people were making fuck tons of money. We know this already. And that's not even that's not even the bulk of their income coming out of that. Right. Because this is their Twitch numbers. For sure. Their big numbers are coming off sponsorships.

It's going to be companies, companies playing paying product to be placed in their stuff. You know, like that's where we're going to see the money from this. I'll forget that for a reason. Yeah. Oh, yeah yeah oh yeah or or doing these exactly checking out that new game maybe he plays his main game forever but whatever that is right so you see some of that and you're like well these numbers don't mean anything and watching the community react to these numbers was kind of dumb from my perspective but then the other too much credence in it like yeah like the twitch numbers fucking matter the twitch numbers didn't fucking matter at all like anything like if i look at that and i go well twitch is x percentage of my income

and and then you you extrapolate that out for these other people and you assume it's even better their percentages like in other words twitch is an even smaller percentage of their revenue by and large i would guess from a lot of these streamers but then you see the other side of that which is well if i'm at this level and i'm making it at such a small margin essentially what the fuck are most of the people doing there? Like how few streamers are actually. If I'm better than almost everyone and not rich, my goodness,

almost everyone else is broke. They're getting themselves that this is even a job. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly that. And it was kind of shocking how high that was because I'm a, I'm a pretty small streamer. And like to see that, like as a ranking for that i'm like wow really on the

whole fucking platform with eight million people streaming i'm 3700th you fucking kidding me like yeah that kind of that kind of blew my mind a little bit that portion of it i wonder if there will be well i guess they couldn't really leak uh like sponsorship deals because that's more independent and on the back end depending on the streamer so wouldn't i thought not through i've never taken one of those i don't know if the offers i get are like legit or not and also they're not huge like the offers i get are like 800 bucks and i don't want to be an asshole or anything but i'm like yeah for 800 i'll just fuck you i'll just do what i prefer to do like yeah it's like this isn't enough for me to really get behind your your product right right i'm gonna play some game

that i'm obviously paid to play you know and pretend i like world of tanks for this uh no well i mean tons of games i mean they obviously make their money back in spades or otherwise they wouldn't do this like is stuff like among us and fall guys, I feel like we're almost entirely artificially created as a trend by paying huge streamers to make it popular and encourage people to download it and, and get on there. I didn't think of that, but I bet you're pretty right.

Ish. I mean, if those games weren't fun, then the advertising wouldn't work. You have to advertise a product people enjoy. Kyle was never going to play Fall Guys, though.

He said it looked stupid. It was stupid and it wasn't very good. My son still plays it. It's on his computer right now. Really? He plays it all the time. He's very good he's my son is he's got to be a one percent fall guy player he wins like every fifth game does he have oh he has more than one win okay well then he might be a little better than me

he has more than 500 wins i think like i don't know like he't know. He wins a couple times a day. Jesus. Yeah, I was trying really hard to win for hours of streaming and I won once. Ever. I remember I was joking that I was going to get the game

and beat it once as fast as I could and then never play again. It looked like so little fun that I couldn't bring myself to spite you. How many people play? 60? Does that sound right? Something like that. It's a huge game. And then in the final round, they'll be like 6.

It's weird if he's not in the final round. Like something odd happened. Yeah, often I would not make it to like the last round, you know, where it'd fall or you get knocked over or sometimes you just get fucked because it seems kind of random, like all the pendulous balls that swing at you and everything. Are you streaming again, Taylor, or no? No, not yet. I think I'm going to kick it up again soon, though.

I haven't for a while. What happened with the show's most recent streamer? Oh, yes. Yes, you are. I don't know the story. I think I'm the show's most recent streamer. Oh. Yes, you are. I don't know the story. Do you mind giving me a few seconds? Basically, my wife has a health issue, a problem with her spinal cord right now. I haven't dressed on the show in a while. And basically, it was like all that time at night that I would, if I'm not doing this or PKN or streaming, I was kind of like, all right, well, this is like a lot more important than that. It's a very serious thing.

It's called the cavernous malformation in her spinal cord, which is really rare. It's an overgrowth of blood vessels. They thought it was a tumor. And then they figured out when we took her to Mayo Clinic way up in Minnesota that it wasn't a tumor. clinic way up in Minnesota that it wasn't a tumor. It was this malformation of blood vessels and that can bleed and cause a huge number of problems ranging from like pain, which, you know, she had a pretty painful night last night too, to like, you know, if something really bad happens and there's a really bad bleed, it could be paralysis. So it's very scary. We were originally, or I guess so many things have changed that it almost matches back up with what I said a couple

months ago that we're still waiting to do the surgery. Cause she's, she's still struggling with pain and everything, but because she's improving, you know, as a whole we're hoping that we can, cause it's easier for the doctor, the surgeon to remove and take care of if it's like shrunk a lot instead of

when it's really overgrown. And so if we can wait it out and hopefully it doesn't re bleed, then we can either avoid a surgery. That's what we're praying. Or we'll have to just go to Mayo and get the surgery, which, you know, insurance doesn't cover huge amounts of it.

We found out, but it's such a rare problem that like, there are like one hand number of people in the country that have dealt with this. And so the guy at Mayo, this dude with like an italian accent very he wrote the book all the pamphlets on cavernous malformations that happens but he's i'd say mid-50s okay probably mid-50s um yeah yeah for sure um and so we're still waiting we're

hoping that'll continue to go down if a couple months go by and we get another mri and they say it hasn't shrunk or that they think it might bleed again there's no way to predict the bleed um then we'll probably go the surgery route but we're hoping to because you don't want invasive surgery especially on your spine there's always a huge amount of risk there like it's and it's not on the spine it's in the spinal cord which is like fucking scary very very very scary for both of us and so really the streaming thing was like you know i'm going to take a break for a while these evenings i'm going to spend time with my wife

you know we're both very very anxious about it thinking about it all the time and so that's kind of been where i'm at uh because now we're planning to wait a couple more months or at least like another yeah i guess another eight weeks or so before she gets another mri we have to go back up to mayo or we're going to go back up to Mayo to get the MRI because their MRI machine even is better than anything in like the, the rest of the Midwest. It's like two levels above it and they can see more, more distinct detail,

which on something that small you really need to see. So we're hoping and you know, really that we can go up there and get the MRI. They'll say it's continued to shrink, you know, hopefully pain continues to go down, but we're prepared, you know, it's her mentally preparing for it more than me, but me also. I'm so worried, sick about her. But yeah, sorry, that's a huge downer. But that's why I've been taking the break

from streaming just because it was kind of like, there are more important family things right now. I need to be there for my wife, especially in those nights. Sorry to bring that up. I didn't know you were on this. No, no, no, at all not at all not at all uh people people ask me about it often and so uh it's good i i talked about it again um can't stream because you're caretaking all the time or is it more just knocked out of the groove it's it's like knocked out of the groove but also's like knocked out of the groove, but also like it's good for both of us instead of like multiple nights a week,

her being out there by herself, like kind of ruminating on all these scary things that I'm out there with her. We're watching movies together. We're, you know, playing games together or whatever it is. And that's good for both of us. Like it's not me doing it for her.

Like I want to be around her too because she's my wife and I care about her deeply and i'm just you know i want to be there for however i can but gotcha yeah i'm planning to kick up streaming again though uh i don't know how often or what i'll even do i if i leave it up to the audience actually what if i come back and all I do is magic now? People would hate that. They would hate it. Taylor, it's time for archery. I get stream archery. I'm not confident

enough in my form and abilities yet. I don't want to get roasted by all the expert archers. I should do weightlifting twice. They were all cool about form abilities. I saw one of those. Oh, did you? You need to put the camera downrange, though, and shoot toward the camera.

That'll be cool. And expensive. That's an idea. I'll get a little piece of Lexand. Just a really short stream. The better I am, the shorter the stream will be. It shows the bottom nine hours and 40 minutes. Yeah.

Just couldn't hit it to save my life. just couldn't hit it for a while have you had this thought that you want to get her operated on so that this doesn't cause a problem during pregnancy like if she's gonna pump out a kid or two then you don't want her to face this during that yeah that's definitely been a thought in our minds uh so we're not getting pregnant right now because of this especially and you know yeah especially me i'm not gonna ever get pregnant i'm a man but um yeah that definitely is entered into it um but then it's also like men can get pregnant not this one but uh but yeah that's that's kind of what we were thinking also. And so before we did that, we'd want to have, and even then, like, unfortunately, it's not like a broken leg.

Like, there's so little data on this that, like, even when we're asking the guy who wrote the book on it, he's like, what can we do to predict a bleed? Or what should we have her, what activities should she not be doing? This, that, the other thing, all these questions. And he's like, you know, I wish I could tell you more. There's not enough data. Like this is a very rare thing. And so we don't know what causes a bleed. We don't know how to predict it, but it can bleed again at any time. And we're like, okay, but once you do the surgery, it won't bleed again. He's like, well,

we can't guarantee that either. You know, like it could, it could bleed again. The surgery could fix it. And so it's like, well, fuck, this is a very, you know, he's like, and genetically it could be like a genetic thing that ends up going away. So it's like there's so many up in the air things, even when talking to like the expert of experts on it, that it's like it's difficult, I feel like, to make a decision. But the surgery is designed to stop this from happening in the future, right? It is. They never want to guarantee an outcome but that is the point of it yeah yeah and like he said that like with successful surgeries

he's had patients get it and then go 15 years with no problems or whatever it is uh so it's just a matter of there being so little information about it that it's like okay but is it like we get the surgery and then there's a 10% chance it'll bleed again? Is it a 30%? Is it now it's 50-50 instead of a foregone eventuality? Where is that line and when does it make sense? Because if it's not that big of a benefit, spinal cord surgery is no joke. So you don't want to go into that willy-nilly.

Not like, oh, your leg's broken. Let's just pop that right back. Let's let's fix it. We'll put some screws in there, do this and that. Later too. You're good to go. Yeah.

Yep. And so she's bummed because she hasn't been able to work out in months now. And like, just, and it'll go coming like just yesterday I was lifting and she was down there with me walking on the treadmill only like a 30 30 minute like brisk walk on the treadmill. And last night she was having some pretty significant pain. And so it was like, well, fuck.

I choose to believe you're down there flexing on her. Just like, man, my back feels strong. I'm going to do good morning, honey. I'm just I'm setting off the lunk alarm. I'm throwing my own dumbbells across my gym. Yeah. Oh, you know,

speaking of, I bought a rackable by a easy curl bar. So if you guys don't, for people that don't live, the easy curl bars, the one with all the bends in it, you do biceps and maybe try some work, whatever.

I fucking love my rackable bar. It is the greatest thing to have i'm so happy with it i kind of abuse my weightlifting equipment like i'll drop it or whatever and i'm just like go and go into the just like fucking drop it on the rack i knew that it was going to be nice because i didn't have to pick it up off the floor anymore like that's what i expected i didn't foresee how nice it was when you're done to not carefully put it down. I just drop it on my squat rack like I do everything else.

And yeah, it's literally improved pool day. How heavy is the bar? Like 45? 35. And that's another thing too. My last bar weighed 18. So the math of like 18 plus 225s and a two and a half

that's incalculable. No one knows how much I'm lifting. Nobody knows. But with 35, like any bro knows that like whatever you throw, I don't curl this much, but you throw a pair of 45s on a 45 and it weighs 135. Then you do this bro math

like two plates of this, whatever. And you kind of have these like known solutions. It's that. You kind of have these known solutions. It's that minus 10. I have these known solutions. I don't do math. I just remember how much different plates weigh. It's still incalculable, but I know the answers. Are you doing anything else with it?

Like weird grip bench or anything? I don't know how extreme it is because some of those curl bars almost have a hammer curl in the middle. It's not that strong. So far, I just do curls with it, and then I do the reverse curls where your palm's face down. But we'll see. Maybe I'll work something else into it.

Kyle, can you see yourself building out a home gym if you decide to move or something like that? Are you for sure? Yeah, you're going to love home gym master race, man. i um that's something i've given a good bit of thought to um again i haven't quite decided what i'm going to do so that's gonna wait but uh but yeah i've looked at equipment i would keep it pretty i mean i would base it around like the workouts that i like to do right like there's certain pieces of equipment that i absolutely have to have and there's a few that i don't need at all obviously i need dumbbells are a given and uh you know but but there's there's some stuff i need and some stuff i don't a lot of it's expensive though i might price it out and be like i'm a gym guy really yeah because like how expensive are you talking for this well like if you if all right so

the gym i go to if you were to try to buy all of the equipment that i actually use granted all right so so it's it's a little unfair because i'm using different machines and there are other machines that would combine multiple exercises multiple machines into one you know i mean there's like but i use like eighty thousand dollars worth of machinery every time i go you know every week like when you compare every uh combine everything i do because there's so many machines and like a you know a gym gym right i assume though that the benefit of like the home gym is the idea that you know for the sole reason that i prefer to run from my house as opposed to go to a gym to run right which is the you remove that that that step that prevents you from doing the shit that you want to do anyways right that's the convenience of it so

so um i find that if i've driven somewhere to do a thing i'm much more likely to complete all of my tasks whereas if are you as likely to have done it in the first place if you if you have to drive somewhere for me it's the it's like if i had the extra step of going somewhere to do it i'm less likely to do it at all than i would be if i could do it from home i'm the same way yeah like i'm definitely having my gym here makes me feel like there is zero excuse for you to not go down there and lift right now like anything like there's no excuse it's right there there's no line like just go do it and that gets me doesn't bother me it's it's it's not terribly far to my gym so i really don't mind just getting up and going i also like hours away in southern illinois and i mean i really like right now it's about

eight and a half um but uh your home gym wouldn't be any closer, but carry on. Yeah. Yeah. So it's a bit of a coin flip. And I definitely see the advantage of being like, hey, do I want to work out? It's 30 steps away. Probably should. Versus like driving even two or three minutes.

But like I said, like once I i get there like the idea of like not completing my task and going home is is uh like that happens so few times like like ever like maybe two or three times i would um or i have like stopped mid-workout and just quit and every single time it's been because i was either nauseous or like vomiting or something like that or like my blood sugar was so bad that like uh you know i had just i had fucked myself up understandable i mean i think you would like it like and you we've talked about this before like you'll finish your entire workout and then if you feel like you have a little more in you like you'll just be like all right well then if you feel like you have a little more in you, like you'll just be like, all right,

well it's pull day. I'm going to go do like kind of a menagerie of pull exercises until I really feel burned out. I do that in my gym and it's like, there's no time limit. Like I get through my entire, you know, push,

pull, leg, whatever it is day. And it's like, you know what? I don't feel like I hit my quads enough. I'm going to do the leg extension machine again, or I'm going to do,

I'm going to do the T bar row. Cause I feel like my back has a little more in it. And like, it's just, I mean, honestly, I, you know, I, look, I get going to do the T-bar row. Cause I feel like my back has a little more in it. And like, it's just fun. I mean, honestly, I, you know, I, look, I get the advantages and the disadvantages, but I mean, I do that at the gym too. Like there's plenty of times where I stay and do, you know, an extra 20 or 30 minutes of just nonsense.

And when you go, you're not really waiting in line cause you're going at good times. Oh yeah. There's no line. I, you know, I, I, I usually go like late at night, um, or off hours sometimes. And, and, uh, even when the time there's been a few times where I've had to go. I've sent you guys videos because it's usually something kooky going on at noon or in the afternoon. I mean, it's crowded, but I don't have to wait. I can move my workout around to the point where there's, all right, well, he's on this but I can do that first. I can

work around them. I'm never standing there waiting. And if I am, I'll just ask to share. I got no problem asking to share. Asking to play through when they're taking forever? Yeah, just share a machine. To share the pec machine or

something. A machine in particular is good for that. If you wanted to share a bench with me, it's hard. We bench different weights, Kyle. Stripping and adding all the time. But if it's a selector machine, which is we just move the pin. Exactly. With the pec deck,

especially if he's doing the same arm position or whatever, we can just move the thing around but if you were if you were building one so you'd want a power rack barbell you'd want like probably five to a hundred pound dumbbells right like the set i would imagine five to a hundred um i think i don't think i need to go all the way to 100. I think I can get everything done with like... See, farmer's carries are weird

because I don't know if I'm better off going lighter or heavier. So I'm not even going heavy with farmer's carries anymore. I usually stay around 75. I was carrying hundreds around, but it was like... I think I can just carry the 75s a little further. You can use weights for that too. That's what I did.

I pulled farmer's carries out, but I have – you do it with plates. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I just like to go further with carrying less because for one thing, it's just like when I release it, even with gloves, it's like – I don't know how to describe it, but it's like pulled like a callus. It's like shifted the skin to one – and I'm just like – I don't know. I'm like, but it's like pulled like a callus. It's like shifted the skin to one. And I'm just like, no, no, no.

I'm like, pull back down. Pull back down. Because you've been holding a fucking hundred pounds for. Yeah. They give you a bunch of calluses. It's not just callus. Farmers carriers. My issue is I go pretty heavy on it.

I think I do 90 in each hand. And to me, that's heavy. And it's like when you pull the heavy shit the injuries are a little tougher the the tendon strain this and that and um that's why i'm not back into farmer's carries because i'm just wanting to be a stronger frame before i add them if you were buying a machine kyle seems like pack deck is the one you would buy to add oh i don't know i would look at a lot of the like more high-end machines that do a lot of different things and and i would just have to look and and find the one that checked the most boxes and there would be a little bit of math

where it's like all right i want a machine that does all these things is it does it make sense to get this one that does them even though it's like a seven thousand dollar,000 machine or an $8,000 machine or whatever it may be? I mean, it worked for Woody. Like you have that super, super nice functional trainer that does everything you could need. I like that thing a lot. Yeah. I use it all the time. I use it today.

What brand is it again? I forget. Cyrex? Cybex maybe? Something like that. Yeah, that's really nice and it's i value my stuff being ready like i like my dumbbell set but you know what the shelf they sit on makes it so much better than it would have been otherwise the selector functional trainer like you want to do face pulls i set it up in like 15 seconds and I'm

ready to do that. I love the trainers at my gym. These are people or machines? No, the machine. I don't even know how to describe that machine. You know, you've seen that gigantic red rack thing that I've shown you before. Oh, the cable crossover. Yeah,

that whole setup thing. You can just do so many things so quickly with that the most expensive part of the home gym is the room like that's where the money is spent you're saying the most expensive part of the home gym is the house so you just told me what is the home yeah yeah yeah just consider like oh i want to add uh whatever like some sort of lat pull down in some other machine. If you want to bump out that room to make space for that, you're like $35,000

into the room expansion budget to add four grand of machines. Yeah, you're better off getting one of those backyard metal buildings at that point, right? You just get something with a big basement.

The best machine in my gym is the HVAC machine. I remember Taylor said it and it stuck into my head. To him, the coup de grace, the finishing blow, the best part of my gym is that functional trainer. And it is probably the most expensive thing. But whenever I describe my gym, I'm like, it has its own AC. That's the big thing that I got.

I love it. And it's a heater. It's a mini split heat pump air conditioner thing. I can have any temperature in that room I want. It means so much to me. It's my favorite thing. Yours is in the basement, right? Or the lowest floor? Yeah, yours. No. I can have any temperature in that room I want. It means so much to me. It's my favorite thing. Yours is in the basement, right?

Me? Or the lowest floor? Yeah, yours? No, it's on the first floor. It's attached to the master bedroom. Oh, okay. Yeah, because mine's in my basement, it's like 10, 12 degrees cooler than my main level. Oh, yeah.

And so I just have fans, and then I set up a couple machines, so I'm getting blasted it's like i sweat a lot when i'm doing the t-bar row and so i never sweat i never sweat it's like 62 in my gym nobody else likes this temperature but i'm the only one in there i don't know i'm sweating what i don't sweat yeah Yeah, you do. You glisten. I get slick. No, I almost never sweat because there's so much rest time

between each of my sets. It's three minutes. And I'm walking around, so I'm keeping... I don't know. I feel like the sweat just kind of dries off. And I'm never dripping with sweat. um like if i super set i am the small of my back will be a little sweaty but like and but that's it and if i if i usually wear these when i work out like like my headset

um and uh like the ear cups will be sweaty the leather on this pattern on my shirt maybe all right so so these aren't like crazy expensive i think they were like 250 be sweaty the leather pattern on my shirt maybe all right so so these aren't like crazy expensive i think they were like 250 or whatever the leather is fucking peeling off of the cups it's really shitty the m50s right it's probably because it's in the gym another benefit of the home gym you don't have to just listen or watch to whatever they have there i know you can like do podcasts or music or whatever, but I like having TV shows on when I work out. I don't want to listen to rock music. I want Family

Guy or King of the Hill or something to distract me a little more. I like that. Click on the link, Kyle. You can buy replacement earpads for those and it's no tools, 60 seconds to swap them off. That's wonderful. I'll get those. I'll buy those. Filthy, are you still rock climbing a good bit

in that new gym you found? I've been in and out of that with COVID. Post all the vaccination stuff, I went back into that and was climbing for maybe a month and a half or so and then Delta flared up again. I did heavy bike riding this summer and fall is what I was doing.

I was doing 30-mile, 35-mile rides. How much is your bike how much expensive is god i've forgotten now 20 i think it was 2500 i think okay so a good bike but not like insane yeah every time i know did i do that tell you about my friend's bike can't remember maybe oh i'm sorry maybe i've come i don't remember honestly so fire away uh and we're the only people we're gonna be boring are your viewers so i'm fired up they matter anyway and quickly dude apparently is like this world-class cyclist and his bike is stupid expensive it's a bicycle i think it costs like fifty thousand dollars he gets it free he doesn't have to pay for it. It's all sponsors and stuff.

I want to see a picture of a $50,000 bike. I don't want to ride it. The wheels are like half the cost itself. The removable wheel part are like $25,000. I want to feel the difference. I want to know what that is. If I ride a $2,500 bike and I've

rode many cheaper bikes throughout my life, I want to know what a fifty thousand dollar bike feels like to ride like what the fuck is the difference what does he and his team win like he and i don't know he and his team win like every they win 85 of the races they enter like it's almost a lock that and he in particular i think wins half of his team's wins like he just just really good i had this thought process when i was buying it i i sometimes right pretty regularly bike with my wife and i'm like i didn't i deliberately i went steel frame again deliberately and part of the thought process is like i'm doing this for

workout man i'm not i'm not entering races i don't want the lightest fucking bike out there part of part of the goal of this is like it sucks to move this fucker you know like that's that's part of what the thing was so anyways i did have that thought like some extra spokes in there that's right just wind resistance it's well some lead you know fucking weights on there no not quite as bad as that but you know you get the idea like you're like at a point i'm like i want i'm one of a nice ride nice bike etc but like i don't want to go too far with it so yeah the only challenge like you said racing or even just keeping up with your friends like if you start getting beat by friends at your same fitness level it's like oh that's not that's not fair you just i say i never even

thought like i guess i could join like a biking team or something like that for for that oh i don't know i like i like it i like hanging out with my wife when we do that we go on these rides they're pretty fun i like to just work out my own fucking pace whenever I want for that. And you know, on a good day, I'll go super far kind of deal versus, you know, whatever.

Like I got a really nice bike trail. The Cedar Rapids is actually really nice for the bike trail stuff around here. So like, I'm pretty close to, uh, I can jump on a trail that goes forever basically. So it sounds like a mountain bike.

Am I right on that? Uh, yeah, kind of. It's more of a mix in that. It's not like a pure mountain bike. No. So cyclocross bike. it's more of a mix than that it's not like a pure mountain bike no so cyclocross bike yeah kind of they're they're they'll blend together a little bit once you start getting into it so it's not it's not a road bike it's not a pure road bike

so okay okay his is a pure road bike he does a criterium racing i'm not sure about that you but i don't think anyway should be allowed on the roadways. I think if they put it to a vote, my side would win, hands down. I think your side would win, but I don't think you should put people's rights up for vote. It's to protect the individuals. I say riding a fucking bicycle isn't a ride, it's a privilege.

And those can be curtailed at will. And we need to put it up for a vote. I think it's in the interest of national security that we get these freaks off the roadways in their tight, skimpy outfits, acting like they're trying to pass some sort of aerodynamic test. They gotta go.

We need more men in tight, skimpy outfits. They got bikes without wheels on them you put in your house. like they're trying to pass some sort of aerodynamic test they gotta go gotta go we need more men in tights they got bikes without wheels on them you put in your house get it keep do that shit in private was that taylor asked that question are you kyle if i was in the climate again what was the reason taylor if i was climbing i was curious oh yeah yeah no i mean used to be like a big part of your identity oh i'm going back into it for sure so um now it's it's now you know i'm uh late late fall now in uh in the midwest so like we're starting to get temperatures out there that's not super pleasant to be on and i've been putting off that kind of covid decision for as long as i can to just enjoy

the fact i can work out from home work out on the bike kind of deal. But I will be climbing again. COVID doesn't impact my actions at all. I give lip service to caring about it, and I certainly wear a mask any place that wants me to. A mask has never impacted me from reaching my goals. I don't give a fuck. I don't call it a face diaper. I'm not one of those guys. My climbing membership is at a major uh university gym and it's fairly tight quarters

in there once you get climbing so it's like it's good i hear you but i would personally be all over it i'm i'm i don't think covid's over but i'm over it i'm just on the bad decision train i would i would do whatever i want i i look i got both shots i me too i bought the rice and the beans i bought the toilet paper i got the shots now i'm now i'm gonna wear the mask whenever you tell me to but i'm gonna do anything else i want all right i'm that's where we are yeah i guess my point was along the lines of this when i don't have to make that a reality right where my decision goes well i could go back to climbing which i enjoy or i could just do the biking for the fitness because i'm doing both of these things for fitness right so i'm like well it's while the weather's nice i

can do whatever i want for that and i've been choosing not to have to make that decision right not to choose between fitness or fucking covid kind of ever in iowa and now it's november in iowa so that that decision is rolling around again i'm gonna join this soccer league just for the the the fall and winter kind of season really do heavy indoor breathing in your soccer league that's my point right so i'm already opening myself up to that risk so i'm very likely going to go back to climbing for that because at some point i'm just like enough to fucking enough but it is still a concern in my mind so i got a lovely immunity the best covet immunity is double vaccination and covet itself yeah that's very true that's right that's the way to do it right that's where you're hitting most diseases just get them and then maybe get a booster from a

different company because that's what i'm going to do in a few months yeah so i'm torn on that because it i thought moderna was the second best one i thought pfizer was better yeah now there's more and more data out it seems like moderna is the best one to have which is what i have i mean i'm an amateur virologist it would make sense to mix it up a little get the pfizer oh yeah i'm gonna mix. But I feel like I already have the best one. Why not get a third best? Well, why would I step down and get Pfizer? I got a rabies shot the other day,

just in case. No, didn't you hear what he, why didn't you just get rabies? There were 12, the best protection longterm. There are $12. I was like,

give me one. Let's go. Did you really get a rabies vaccine? No. Is that a thing? I don't know what people get. I don't know my vaccines really well. I've been looking at like...

Yeah, come on. Load it up, Doc. Give me one of those too. I've been looking at stupid travel. When you go to Africa, you get a bunch of vaccines that Americans don't typically get. Yeah, yellow fever. Yeah. I'm like, I wonder if my doctor knows what to give me because you have to like show vaccine passes and such oh yeah i'm sure there's a list

online and and you're like yeah i need to get that that dingy fever vaccine all those nonsensical diseases as always they're giving you this what you need to do before you go there if you actually because because i know that like in the next five years your goofy ass is going to try to go to africa for some reason you're going you know you're going you're going he's got to folks he's got to go to africa oh maybe he'll bring whatever he needs that to be a motor motorcycle it needs to be a bad decision i'm just gonna go there it's gonna be the last post be a motor motorcycle it needs to be a bad decision i'm just gonna go there it's gonna be the last post on your youtube channel it's gonna be like oh the

paramotor is going down right now but i'll be making a landing so i do not know um yeah i think that's a very poor idea but i wish you the best of luck in africa amongst if i didn't make poor decisions i'd miss out on half the shit i do. You know what I kind of want to do? I want to go to that Sentinel Island where those uncontacted people are. The ones who are like assholes who shoot bows and arrows at you if you try to show up and teach them electricity and stuff.

But I want to show up with body armor and less than lethal weaponry and bully them. That's the way to go. Wait. Taylor should bring his own bow and arrow oh they don't even know look at you fuckers with your homemade bow we're talking about you bow and arrow the sentinel islands remember that guy went and they killed him that they shot him with a bow as you approach right you need to go with some body armor and some archery skills and some modern weaponry.

Guns. No, no, not guns. I can't have those. Now you're a bully, Taylor. Don't be a bully. Wait, wait. You need a better bow and arrow. You need a crossbow.

Whatever it takes to beat the people of Sentinel. We're trying to go in and dominate. We don't want a crossbow because they're going to be too quick with those little stick flingers, and you're going to be reloading, even the modern ones. We need, if we're going to really just run the score up on them, we need guns. We need guns because they're going to be better at archery than us. That's all they have.

But I said we should train and get better. They make their own bows. They probably use deer horns and vines. I've made my own bow before. It breaks when you pull it. I remember doing that as a kid. Like, why won't any of these curved dead branches make a bow and arrow? I used a bunch of duct tape.

Right. So you're going to go in there with maybe a compound bow and a sight. They don't have a sight. That's true. It'd have to be a range game because you'd have to see them coming because they're on their home turf. They know the trails.

I don't want to kill them or anything. I think we should go in with body armor. Oh, what are we talking about? I was going to kill them. I feel like if you were... Kyle is talking about God Complex here. He wants to go in with body armor that's indestructible and a weapon, a non-lethal weapon that they can't

deal with. This is even more fun. This is the juggernaut armor from Modern Warfare 3. I want to go in there and bully them and blow their minds with some basic technology and shit and make them think I'm a god and then tell

them all crazy, kooky, made-up shit. Dude, they already would think you're a god. Look at... They're all probably... I'm going to guesstimate average height. 4'10". In that tribe. You, 6'2", and you're built like an Adonis.

They haven't seen lats before. They won't know what that is. They'll think it's spirits that are providing... They climb trees and they have a lot of wings. They don't don't know so yeah i like that idea more than killing them all becoming their god but then what sort of what sort of nice like little trinkets could they even give you what do they don't have gold out there or like some oysters maybe you know maybe i could just like like yeah if not gold oysters that's the's the payoff? Oysters? Yeah. Seems like a lot of work for oysters.

They're like $8 each. You could go clamming out here. There's no gold here. There's no gold here. But there'd be oysters. Oysters. But what would your first edict be as Lord of the Sentinel Islands?

Oh, help me. What is it called? Prima Nocta. It's the thing we all say we would enact in all of his fantasies. The first step in pretty much every single fantasy, monkey boss scenario, genie, magic wish.

What's pre-monocta for the four people who haven't heard us talk about it? Wish upon a shooting star birthday candle type scenario. Well, we immediately go to sort of a pre-monocta type situation. Well, it's your right. That's right, as king or emperor. I haven't decided yet. You're's right as king or emperor i haven't decided yet you're gonna go king or emperor you're not gonna what else is all respect for you the first time to take your armor off kyle well well i i think i would like to be referred to as lord i think that's a ring to it lord what about like your majesty i i don't care for that. I would prefer Lord or Liege

because that sounds more... Ooh. My Liege. He's going to like Dune, isn't he? Yeah. Oh, a lot of Lords and Lieges and Dukes. Yep. Barons.

Is Baron Harkonnen in there? Is he going to be up to some no good? I think we can trust him this time around. You're going to like the actor who they got for him. The grizzled guy from chernobyl he's good i'm aware i saw the uh the casting months ago uh yeah i'm looking forward to it i'll i'll get it watched my liege is great that's such a good one under underused yeah that's what i want that's what i want i want to wait no is that a title or does my liege mean like person i am like beholden to i believe it's the latter i i believe it's the latter i i believe you'd be like liege lord i think that's the name of a magic card um yeah a liege lord is uh like you're like

someone who has medieval authority over you um for sure yeah well i mean filthy brings up a good point in that the second you take the armor off the illusion is going to be shattered so you're going to have to be prepared to like live i love by that but that'll be like lunchtime by then i'd have long gotten bored and either left or slaughtered them and they're like wait you were going to tell us about antibiotics and you're like i'm bored i'm bored you guys are living in bullshit little huts i thought i were going to tell us about antibiotics and you're like, I'm bored. I'm bored. You guys are living in bullshit little huts. I thought I was going to be king. I'm king of nothing.

Can you make another one of those Twinkies from Magic? You asshole, that was my pocket. Yeah. I only had one. I only had one. Yeah, I would get bored by lunchtime and either just abandon them or slaughter them one way or the other. I just kind of like the idea of bullying some savages, I would get bored by lunchtime and either just abandon them or slaughter them one way or the other.

I just kind of like the idea of bullying some savages, I guess. And there's that one little group of them left that's kind of bullyable because they're assholes. It's like getting off your bucket list. Bully some savages. They're running out of savages. That's true. There's so few savages to bully. There was a time when if you were a Spaniard and you're prime and maybe your dad had a little cash and

you had a little sway with the queen, you could get yourself a fucking vote. They were using Woody's solution to disease too. The Spaniards. The bullying those conquistadors put down. They were the best at bullying, I would say.

You think so? There have been a lot of good bullies throughout history. I think the conquistadors were the greatest bullies of all time or at least the spanish were pretty good spanish they were pretty good bullies and the inquisition all spaniards then i then it's just a win i think the conquistadors alone you know you know those you know they thought that when the conquistadors showed up on those uh those horses with the armor and everything they thought it was one being theyadors showed up on those horses with the armor and everything, they thought it was one being. They didn't differentiate between

the horse and the man riding it because they'd never seen a horse or a man with armor. They didn't see him hop off? I can't ask you that. The illusion didn't last long. Are you sure there were no horses? We're talking about the screen. A very short-lived illusion.

Nobody get off your horse. For a moment we thought it was just one organism wait it's clearly a man on an animal we're not familiar with nope in the history books you're all retards are you sure you have horses at all um i don't think they had no there were no horses um i'm pretty sure there were no horses and so so here's i think it's gone back and forth i think that there were horses in north america and then they went extinct and then we brought horses back to north america um so i think at the time of the indians for example or the american savage as i like to refer to them there There were no Indian. There were no horses.

I'm pretty sure that all the horses that the American Savage interacted with like during the Wild West and such were horses that had been brought over by Europeans. You know, I occasionally finish my time on PKA and find that some of the things said here were not true. I don't think that's right. What? I think that's the first not true thing that's been said yeah apparently have you seen braveheart yep yep that's where they came up in a discussion

of braveheart somewhere so i'm i'm interested about this horse theory like um do you have any wouldn't lie which which part of you curious about? The part about them existing in North America? I've never heard that before. I don't have a source on hand as I sit here in this. I'm not saying that is necessarily one of the things that may turn out to be different. I've just never heard that before.

No, I'm pretty sure I watched a documentary about that. I'm sure Zach could correct me. Okay, look. Now, I googled it. The first six links said it was a myth, but the seventh one said that it might have existed. So, suck it. I don't know about the extinction.

Hang on. He's talking about Prima Nocta, folks. He's not talking about the horses. I am talking about Prima Nocta. They can both be wrong. I'm aware. First of all all I never said pre-monocle was real I was referring to the Gibson movie which I

view to be a historical document it says right here that historians David Wachter and Heckner McKinney said it might have existed I mean might again pre-monocle I mean if it existed there'd be

some I mean I imagine that we'd have some like historical complaint letters from from people about the implementation of it like there was a huge riot over at Prima Nocta and back then they just burned those letters didn't read that shit you kidding me that's true and the people who would be my wife I'm not gonna like sit here and like read your complaint

letter and also like I'm gonna send you an angrily written letter. They didn't know how to read, so they just have to draw a picture of the king deep-dicking their wife and then put a frowny face on the top. Storm cloud

frowny face. I don't know what they're trying to tell me. I don't think they're too fond of me fucking their women. Just riding into town. No, killer. The interpretation of that would clearly be like they want me to make it rain from orgasming on their wife with my

house. Right? Bring down the thunder, they're saying. Clearly they want some lock and load yeah that's right i want to know about the horses zach help me okay i typed in did indians have horses and the first thing says horses were first introduced to native american tribes via european explorers all right so it doesn't mention a previous extinction just that they came over when europeans brought them here that is the question. Were there horses in North America

long ago? And I believe the answer is yes. Predating those Native Americans. I don't know what makes them so Native. I don't get it. I don't get why we just picked a period of time where there's like a cutoff,

right? There's a cutoff to being a Native American. Yeah. What is a cutoff, right? There's a cutoff to being a Native American. Yeah. Yeah. What is the cutoff? I never thought of this, but I see your point. Like they walked over here,

presumably across the Bering Strait or something. The land bridge. And that makes them original. Yeah, we came here by boat and we're not original? I'm a purist. You have to be literally the first guy. Everyone else... Ownership comes from walking, not from boating. You can't claim shit in a boat.

In America, to be a native. If you walked here from someone else, you're an immigrant. By the way, Zach just confirmed I'm correct about the horses. They were in North America and went extinct. What is Zach, like you're linked to Google? Yeah. I'm not prepared.

I don't have my tools. Zach, what happens? That's my job. 45 million years, 45 million year old fossils, a bit before the Native Americans. Aeohippus, the modern horse's ancestor, evolved in North America, survived in... This is boring in the middle of it.

Just read it. 45 million years ago, the horse's ancestors survived in Europe, Asia, and returned with Spanish explorers. The early horses went extinct in North America, but made a comeback in the 15th century. You can't read that? How can you spell so well but not read it? No, I can read it. I was saying that I lost my enthusiasm.

I lost my enthusiasm for the horses because literally today's It was like The important thing to remember here is that I was right. Not according to the bullshit link I have. This is for history.com.

Who would be better? What does it say? That's the thing I said. He's not going to read it. It's too boring to read. Horses were first introduced to Native American tribes via European explorers. That's what I said. Yes.

So I was right. But I'm saying... so i don't understand they went extinct way long ago like a an ancestor to horses or they made it to modern horses and then they went away because it doesn't make they were ancient listen it's hilarious that you're so smart yet your attention span is so short the uh how does it describe it the modern horse's ancestor was here 45 million years ago but the modern horse was brought here by spanish explorers yeah was that short enough let's make sense of that because the question then is well if it's the ancestor was here how did how how what was the continuation of that all right so this branch goes extinct but how did this branch that was the ancestor make it to europe kind of

deal is this like pangea we're talking about wait what is this time frame no no no no pangea was hundreds of millions of years ago so this would this this involved the land bridge yeah this is like that like russia alaska bridge right evolved here, moved with humanity at some point, or just on their own across this land bridge to Europe, or on their own. Then went extinct here, and then got re- That's the idea of this?

That's not the idea. That's the factual evidence that happened. It's what happened. They existed everywhere. Am I going to learn after this that this is bullshit again? No, he just looked it up. There's fossils of the horses here. Alright, so that's... Just don't look it up anymore after we're done talking.

And then there weren't any horses before the... If you're tired of getting disproved on these things, just don't look into it. I don't know why it matters anyway. I just wanted to be known that those savage Americans didn't have any horses until we gave them horses and that I don't know why it matters anyway. I just wanted to be known that those savage Americans didn't have any horses until we gave them horses. And that I don't think that we should just arbitrarily say like, oh, yeah, if you were born before this date, you're a Native American.

Because I feel like I am a Native American. And I feel like my people, the Neanderthals, aren't protected anywhere. And I'm tired of that, too. That is true. I feel like we don't get casinos. We don't even get get a video poker room. I'd be satisfied with that if you had enough Neanderthal blood.

You can open a video poker room. Maybe not a whole casino. Maybe not a fucking Harrah's. Video poker rooms is done already. What should Neanderthals get? Something good. But all the good stuff is taken. I want to be able to sell...

Brothels. Savage Americans don't have good, but all the good stuff's taken. I want to be able to sell... Brothels. Brothels. Boom, yes. Brothels. Savage Americans don't have brothels. Neanderthals could run brothels on their land. But you should have to be at least whatever percentage I am. I was going to go with things like raw milk and warm

eggs, but brothels is just a lot better. It is better than warm eggs. The description is warm eggs. It conjures the image of the worst-cooked diner egg ever. It's just lukewarm and not really cooked.

You must understand there's certain groceries that Americans do differently and eggs are one of them. We sell our eggs refrigerated while nowhere else on the planet does. Would you like an egg? It's a hot, hot, hard-boiled egg. It's been in the car all day. No, it's not hot.

They're not hot. They're just room temperature. Get your hot eggs here. No one's there. Room temperature eggs. The hottest egg since 10 million years ago. It's not so much an egg as it is a baby chicken. It's like when you're looking up recipes, Kyle. The hottest egg since 10 million years ago. It's not so much an egg as it is a baby chicken.

It's like when you're looking up recipes, Kyle, it'd be like, my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather came up with the hot egg on the steps of the Mongolian desert or whatever the fuck we're... The Caucasus Mountains. I went to school with a girl and her grand... No, great-grandfather invented the Cobb salad. There's no way. He did.

There is no way she invented. Okay. It was her great-great-grandfather. Our great-grandfather. No, he lost interest in the middle of those greats. So in his mind, it was just the great-grandfather. He lost interest in the middle of those greats. In his mind, it was just the great-grandfather. It's no good. The Cobb salad was born in the wee hours of a Hollywood

California morning in 1937 at the Brown Derby restaurant. The owner, Bob Cobb, was ruffling through the kitchen's refrigerator, pulling out various remnants. This is Bob Cobb. You knew Susan Cobb? You're talking about Grandpa Cobb!

Heir to the Cobb empire fortune? That's how this shit works. Every time there's a Cobb talent, someone gets a kickback. I believe she was also related to Ty Cobb, which makes sense because of Royston. But no, actually, Taylor, I was trying. His big rival, Waldo Wedge. No, because we're at four hours, I was trying to do another Seinfeld bit

because remember the Seinfeld episode where the guy claims that his dad invented the Cobb salad? He didn't. No, no, no, I'm wrong. That's Curb Your Enthusiasm. That's Curb Your Enthusiasm. That's Curb Your Enthusiasm. Well, then I have seen that one.

Yeah, I haven't seen all of them. You need to watch more of that. I do. I'll watch it after I re-watch Seinfeld for the 100th time. Have you guys seen You? I want to cover You before we end the show. Have you guys heard of this show? I've heard of it, but I haven't seen it.

Apparently, You is one of the more popular TV shows happening right now. i'm watching it on netflix i don't know if it exists somewhere else first and uh i'm only like whatever four episodes deep in so i can't spoil too much for you guys but there's this guy he's a bookstore manager and he seems to be wonderful his dialogue is all very clever he's super perceptive and this girl walks into the bookstore and you want them to be a thing. Cool. So to increase his odds at saying and doing the right things, he starts like, you know, just observing her from the shadows. And you're like, oh, this is a little stalkery. But he's only trying to be the best boyfriend possible.

You know, like gather some intel whatever and then like he sees her with another tender date and starts masturbating in the bushes and and you put you like him so you forgive him for this yeah everyone who hasn't done it and then you know he takes her boyfriend in the basement and hits him in the head with a hammer and eventually kills him but you like him so like you know it's cool and then she has some character flaws that start to get revealed and it's weird how i'm rooting for these people who aren't so great but i'm forgiving a forgiving sins like murder and i'm into the show check out you it'll hook you in less than three episodes. Just why are you?

I'm glad we got here. For a while, I can't remember what the stupid ass question we would always ask our guests was, but I hated it. I thought it was so fucking stupid. Was it about the mermaid? Yeah. God, I hated that. That was so fucking stupid. I hated it. It was stupid the first time for me.

But this is a good one, though, that I think maybe we were talking a week or two ago. Filthy. If you found out a close family member had committed a serious crime, would you turn them in? Close family member committed a serious crime.

Do I get any hints of what the crime is? Yeah. I was vague because I don't know. are you close with your like mother father or yeah sure or my brother brother's probably a good one okay so you find out that your brother has meth distribution no your brother no i'm not my game okay your brother we'll start we'll start you know your brother has killed someone your brother has killed a date um he got her too drunk they got a little bit rough she tripped and fell down the stairs she's dead he's killed her he calls you he's like what do i do what do you do

what do i do so i'm it's not even like it's not even he's asking me to hide the body. He's just wanting advice of what he does in this situation? Not yet. We'll escalate. Okay. Well, the first thing, of course, we're going to try to take care of him, especially with the scenario you just put out. You said there's an accident that happened, essentially. Yeah.

So, of course, we're going to try to do everything we can for him. My real question. That's a softball. So where are we going with this? Yeah, yeah. I'm waiting for the warm eggs to drop. She's allowed to fall down the stairs who all right so first of all who was the guest who was so quick to rat their dad out who was that was that uh drifter drifter okay so we had drifter on and drifter

was ratting his dad out for like tax evasion and shit it got to the point where it was like hey dad did you pay that parking ticket when we're on vacation? Because I'm going to have to call Ohio and let them know. He's such a stickler. Meanwhile, I was like, the only thing I turned my dad in for was if he was actively part of some sort of child molestation thing. If he was molesting children or if he was involved with any sort of of business thereof i can't i can't i can't i'm not ride or die that like like that like something has that was your border human trafficking was fine it was just trafficking of minors yep that was the border for your dad yeah okay that's that's the extent of love for you and your father

yes it is yeah have you told him that i think that'd make a really nice card i think what i told my dad was that he's my favorite person in the world and he told me that i'm his favorite person in the world and that was enough okay good you got each other just goes without saying that last little bit he understood the limitations of that yeah unless there's any pedophile shit dad well he knows he knows if he's you know turns out to be a chomo, then look, I got to rat him out. But if he's selling 18-year-old girls from Bolivia, I can keep my mouth shut. Okay.

That's the deal. And I was just wondering, would you keep quiet about the 18-year-old girls from Bolivia that your brother was importing? Yeah, probably. Right? See, I like to hear that. I like to hear that. Because you're a family man. We all appreciate family here. We would all keep quiet about our brother

trafficking Bolivian women. We would all keep quiet. We wouldn't want any part of it. We might even tell him not to come around. Well, maybe a taste. Just a little. Maybe I get a little entertainment a few times a year. By my silence, entice me.

Let's do all this over the phone as well. Yeah, text it. Text it. We're going to do this in public on Twitter. Send me an email. No, no. Just tweet me. text me we're gonna do this right send me an email all right i'm trying to fucking you know send some women i'm glad to see that you would uh you would not write out your family member um i let me just say like quickly i don't know i know you probably don't watch the show every week, but Drifter, real good guy. I like him.

I hope he'll come back on and be our guest more. But sounded like he had some real mental health issues that had me very concerned. And I was amazed at the end of that show that we hadn't discussed it more by the end. It felt awkward that we hadn't discussed the fact that he was coming off. I don't want to make light of it like he came off like he might have some issues right am i wrong here okay yeah for sure

we're all a little crazy with the hallucinations and everything definitely i mean we're all a little crazy but all right so let me help you out with this filthy so that you'll get on my side because Woody's being like, we're all a little crazy. He sees a dark man sometimes in his home. The dark man will look at him around corners and stuff. He sees him a lot. In dreams? No.

During his waking hours. It's not real, so it's a dream. It's called real so it's a dream it's called schizophrenia he's experienced he told you guys that he sees a shadowy figure that is in his reality and this isn't like he's thinking about like there's a person there or something this is just he literally sees a figure in his house and he has a hard time grasping what's real and what isn't real. Or he said he did as a child. Okay, I don't want to misquote, but my

understanding was that if he saw the dark man tonight, he wouldn't be blown away. Yeah, yeah. Like some shadow people or some scary and like he knows it's not real. And look, you know, we're shooting this shit here. I bet he makes really interesting content. We're shooting this shit really interesting content we're shooting

we're shooting this could be a pro in his but he doesn't make that kind of content he doesn't make like silly content he makes like funny little serious gaming content or whatever like he doesn't he doesn't go yeah so i saw the dark man today if you are seeing people regularly like actual hallucinations you should definitely go fucking talk to someone that's for sure that seems to go without saying that i don't even know why you are asking me that in like a sentence like that that's um because because because woody was like hey we're all a little crazy and i was like i don't know i'm worried for drifter sounds like kyle doesn't see dark people that makes him the weirdo am i right i don't see the shadow realm dude let me just say this i know we're like it's time to

end the show but like right i looked out my window the other night and i remember that there's nothing out there but if there's been something out there i remember thinking like what if something was out there it would have what do i do your window and there was someone in your fucking house because you see people in your house you're just like ah it's normal he doesn't do anything he's just there if i saw actually it'll be a real guy if i saw a fucking dark person out here right now and just so everyone listening is clear i'm not talking about an african-american we're talking about shadowy figures shadow hallucinations if i saw a dark person i could never sleep alone or live alone again for the rest of my fucking life he just looks at me around corners my skin was crawling as you were describing that yeah um but but yeah i enjoyed you i always do filthy um i

wish we had spoken about that new game that um um humankind game or whatever it's called what's it called i have been playing i did play some humankind a couple months ago i'm playing dark dungeon 2 right now i'm looking forward to the magic set. That's what I'm probably working with next. I'm not sure. Are you talking Age of Empires 4 perhaps? I'm not sure where you're going. You got it right the first time. The one that was a bit like Civ 5. I'll come check out your stream

sometime soon. I always do right after you're on. See what you got going on. Sounds good. It's good talking to you all. Hope you're doing well. Hopefully none of you are seeing dark figures. Oh my god. I'm so scared now. You're going to be spooked tonight. It's going to be ghouls and goblins. I'm all alone.

I'm miles from people. It's black and white. If you see them around the lake, that's kind of normal because it's dark out by that lake. There was something moving around in the bushes when I went outside to smoke earlier. Every movement is unexplained and dangerous when you're alone. I'm going to text you scary things. It had to be a deer or a coyote.

It could have been a person. It didn't have to be one of those. It's true. They don't even have big knives here. The knives in this house suck. You don't have a big knife. That doesn't mean they don't. Very good point. Luckily, all the doors have big panes of glass as do the windows.

I was thinking about that today. My wife will fuss at me if I don't do the deadbolt on the door. These are glass doors. If you do any of the locks, you've done more than enough. Because none of it's stopping shit. It's the illusion of security.

It's security theater yeah low-hanging fruit right you stop the guy who like pulls on the door see if it's open you don't stop the guy's kicking in your door and for that either lock gets it done don't tell me i need to do the regular lock and the dead boulder we're unsecured around here no we're we're unsecured you just don't know it that's right that's right so filthy where can everybody find you those look secure twitch.tv forward slash filthy robot you can find me on youtube at filthy robot twitter filthy underscore robot that's the best spots probably to get to me so a stream five days a week thanks for having me me on guys. Real lock. Of course.

Well, you're just going to have to hope we don't see him next week. We know what happened to Google filthy robot. He's the top three hits. Yeah. Oh, by the way, this is,

I made this. So there'd be fewer echoes in the room. Like, like this is all like a giant blanket on the table. Very good. Yeah. It was a lot better than PK and for sure. Yeah. There's like,

there's like two chairs on the table covered with a blanket see the effort this man puts into it he'll drink off doing all i got giving it all i got blankets and chairs folks blankets and chairs pka 568