Painkiller Already - PKA 578 W/ OVERTFLOW & BlameTruth : Kyle Trolling Diego Sanchez, Wings Stories, YouTube Boxing

Episode Date: January 15, 2022

pka 578 starting with two guests this week overt flow and blame truth taylor this episode of pka brought to you by feels cbd and as always the best cum pills in the world buy yourself some lock and load come like a man bust like a champion all the olympians are taking this i'm here like a man is what you do now coming like a horse is what you'll do soon yeah come like a better man come like a man who comes more but yeah thank you guys both for coming on of course yes absolutely i heard something was going on with you blame truth that you had a very unsettling or or bad experience in the last couple days you might not have been able to even do the whole show can you tell us about that uh yeah um whenever i come

on to the show afterward i'll check out the subreddit just out of ego i guess and people are like man that bt is like a tweaker and i'm like i'm not on anything but that's just me you know but uh here's a tweaker story um took way too many i misread an edible um i misread an edible label by about 10 times the amount zero what did you think it was and what was it five and it was 50 but i did more than just one so it it was uh i'm just recreational user like once a month you know 10 times five is a reasonable amount to take. Yeah, I was like, oh, five. These are no big deal.

I'll pop three, four, you know, whatever. And it wasn't good. Really bad. What happened? Did you throw up? Truth be told, I didn't feel like i was in control like i was a passenger like you know couch lock did you ever hear that you're like dissociating almost uh it was the only thing i could will myself to do was walk in a circle so if you look behind me you'll

in fact i i wonder if i can pull the ring camera footage because i have a ring camera in my house it doesn't it doesn't record but they might have something but um so if you look behind me there's like a doorway there you can walk through that doorway and then walk to the kitchen and walk through it's like a big circle thing i was just walking in a circle for what seemed like an hour at one point sometimes that's what you have to do when you're too high is just like stay moving try and get through it i remember when i was high and i had my hands like this and you asked me why and i told you i was holding on yeah it was it was it was bad though uh hallucinations a little bit mostly auditory

um jesus a lot of stuff i was out i mean i was like i was like i think i slept for like jesus like 15 16 hours something like that it must have been refreshing yeah i caught up on sleep yeah it was that sounds absolutely terrifying yeah it was i mean you people forget like because like compared to hard drugs weed isn't really that impressive in its effects but it's a real drug it'll fuck you up especially edibles like it's easy i thought it was unimpressive in its effects edibles have always been fucking well you go hard with the i i'm too afraid to go half as far as you have don't do it like like you get a thousand milligrams i would like i've smoked enough weed in my life that when i get way too high i sit there and i'm like you're gonna be. You've done this a hundred times.

A thousand, I might be one of those guys who goes to the hospital and is like, I don't know what needs to happen, but please give me something. I did not partake in the devil's lettuce. The only time this has ever happened to me, and I don't think I've ever told this story ever. I'm a little embarrassed, you guys, okay? It's okay. I was at a Call of Duty event. Snoop Dogg,

Wiz Khalifa were performing. My cousin was there with me. He ended up having to go home. He had bought edibles from somebody just from like, not like an actual store or anything, but just from some guy there. Just a guy, you know, trustworthy guy, probably. So he eats one of these chocolate bars

and then he leaves the other one on the counter. He's there for a few more hours. He's like, you know, those didn't work at all. I'm gonna go ahead and go home. No problem. Whatever is the same one. So I he leaves. He gets on the plane back to Texas. I'm still there. I'm drinking a little bit. I have no food in the room. I eat the chocolate bar because I'm like, oh, he got he got scammed. It's just chocolate. I eat it. I'm literally the guy who calls the ambulance who's like in the bathroom. Tell my friends like, dude, I'm having a heart attack. My cousin gets back to Texas and his twin brother calls me and tells me, yo, I had to help Adam off of the plane.

There's you do not eat that chocolate. And my cousin's like being on edible. So if he could handle it, I was I was in the midst of a serious panic attack it affected me for many days no no i mean didn't you taste that it wasn't good chocolate at the very least i i was drunk taylor oh oh no well that makes it way harder yeah that's my only experience with edibles it was very scary yeah and all drugs are like that, really. Because we talk about weed like this all the time. Because I'm not a degenerate, I don't do fucking cocaine and heroin. But from what I hear from those people, a lot of times they'll get used to this weak-ass cocaine or heroin that they've been using.

And then they'll get exposed to someone who goes hard in the paint. But with cocaine or heroin, they get exposed to like someone who goes hard in the paint like but with cocaine or heroin they get exposed to their shit and then that's when people like literally die or like have episodes and stuff marijuana is the same thing like people be eating these cutesy edibles that you get at a store and then some stoner granny will make them some brownies and they they go to another goddamn dimension they get like the meet the devil. Looking back, it's wild that I would go to a friend's place in college or whatever, and they'd be like, have a brownie. It's like, how much is in there? I don't know.

And you would do that, and there were times I explicitly remember. This is two of the times I've been highest in my life. Both happened to be times I was trying to explain Magic the Gather gathering to someone that happened with kyle and chiz in colorado where i i tried to keep up with with kyle and chiz which was a not a great idea and i was basically like not able to form words almost till i came back from the precipice and this was another time where i did that same thing and like i can remember like my i ate this huge brownie and it started to kick

in quickly usually you get a nice little ride up but this was strong enough that it kind of accelerated there and he was like putting down a card in a tapped position and it wasn't supposed to be tapped and he was asking me a question about creatures or something and i remember in my head being like you can call an uber and be home in half an hour right now and but my man but my mouth was like you can't tap that yeah and i just ended up sitting there playing turns out magic the gathering great game for when you're too high it's just it's enough attention that you're not focused on how scared you are do you think there should be some kind of like all right so here's

what i think let me just like storm this bridge i've always said i think that like most drugs narcotics and everything should be legal but like at least at the very least decriminalize and we should treat with treatment instead of prison yeah because like i've been in prison before a little bit and like there's like villains in there like like people that border or like borderline evil and then there are people who are in like positions who are going to continue to do things that you might consider to be evil regardless of like what's inside of them and then there's a few guys in there who just like wanted to make a little bit extra money and then there's like people like me that just like getting high and they don't all belong mixed together we

need like three or four different facilities for for all those people to go like diverge yeah well the people like you shouldn't have a facility at all. Well, we should. It should just be full of dope and pussy all day. They should be like, oh, that guy's cool as shit. Come right in, Kyle. Yeah, yeah, you're stoned right now, aren't you? What if we had those mental health depression centers,

but it's just full of pussy and drugs, alcohol, just the least healthy way to cope? I want to help write the theme song to that place. It would say, the chorus would be pussy and drugs, pussy and drugs. Come have some pussy and drugs. It's not very creative, but I guarantee it'll work. It gets to the point.

Who says when you're here, your family? Olive Garden. Olive Garden. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't agree, though, on that whole drug thing. I think that you should be able to do we're all adults here. I think that pretty much you should on that whole drug thing. Yeah. I think that you should be able to do – we're all adults here. I think that pretty much you should be able to do whatever you want. I think there should be treatment centers if you need it.

I don't believe that people should be doing months in prison for a little – a small little blunt there. Yeah, I don't care about it. And, like, I just think you should be able to do whatever you want with your own body. I think – I am kind of of the mind that like selling drugs i kind of see the thing there right but like using drugs has never made any sense to me like like i'll tell you what else doesn't make sense to me but i don't want to legislate against it it's those people that get those goddamn gauges in their ear what are you doing to yourself no we can we can let you get we're not in a real society if we don't get rid of some of this stuff look i'm not trying

to i don't understand and i don't want you to stop but i'm not going to take your right they should have their gauges removed and be forced to run through the woods at night until a fucking stick glances through. And then that problem solves itself. No, no, no. People who reshape their tongue. They have to learn fly fishing in an afternoon. You guys are describing a good friend of mine who he gauged his ears to the point where he overdid it. Yeah.

And they blew out. Give up. And he had that means where the earlobe was stretched. It just fucking broke. It snapped. It just blew its O-ring. Oh, so it's like not elastic anymore? Yeah.

No, it just broke. So then he had to, I swear to God, he did this. He had to cut his earlobes. He had to cut them off. No chance. He had just a gummy worm? He did it. He didn't go, he did it himself.

No, this guy, he's one of my best friends. You're talking about tongue gauging or whatever you said. He split his own tongue with a needle and fishing wire. I saw him do it, or I wouldn't be saying this. Wait, a needle and fishing wire. I saw him do it or I wouldn't be saying this. Wait, a needle and fishing wire. How did he... Time out, time out. This is going to really bother me if he describes it.

You can picture it, Taylor. No, no, I can't. How do you actually split it with the wire? Do you like... Did he sew it through the bottom of the tongue and then just like pull? There's a video somewhere on the internet I'll have to ask him for it of him doing it to someone else.

No! They wanted him to do it. Well, thank God. It's not hostile or anything. Not hostile. But he's like threading a needle. You thread this needle. You stick it through.

You've got fishing line. And then you just, you know, gradually... Tie it through you've got fishing line and then you just you know gradually tie it to a doorknob and use it like a saw kind of like a saw yeah that's how he did it at least what a lunatic that he sawed his own tongue and oh did he talk weird afterward no he talks fine

so there wasn't even like a beginning phase where you talk to him and you're like you sound different? Not really. I've always thought that. Having two little forks on your tongue, that's got to make you pronounce things different. Maybe you can whistle better or something.

Sounds terrible. He has a split penis as well. What? Take him off, Kyle. Keep him off. Kyle, put him back on. Keep him off. Okay, so he bifurcated his penis.

Because I'm not a rookie. How far up? How far down? Oh, wow. Wow. I think it was just the head. I've seen it. I know exactly what that looks like.

I wonder what the stream looks like once you do that from what I have heard it changes it's a dribbly mess I would get or maybe you can part the head and then pee well

through the opening I'll have to ask him you know when you've got a garden hose but you don't have quite enough pressure to get that mud off your truck and you put your thumb over there and it goes... He's got to do that to his dick now. I could actually ask him right now. Tell him to send a photo so we can all see.

Yeah. If we can get a video of him urinating, I'd like to see the stream from a POV kind of angle. I don't know if it would be cool with sending the photo, but I'll ask him about the urine. Definitely, it wouldn't be half and half pee. He had to pick a side for his urethra. I mean, we can FaceTime, whatever. This doesn't need to be a part of the show.

I'll pay for the lonely fans. I suspect that this penis was done by a professional and that his friends didn't come out this well. But this is what we're looking at. Zach, you can't show that. Yeah, you can't show that, Zach. What if Zach instantly... You saw it do the thing where there's a little pause and you're just like, no!

You know what it looks like? It looks like a mountain goat's hoof. It does look like a hoof, doesn't it? It looks very hoofy. I need another look. What is the benefit of this? What is the benefit? I don't know. Who's helped by this? Zero benefit. In my mind, if I'm a chick and I see this,

I think this guy has some new and exciting moves. Oh, I'm thinking this is my last evening on this earth. This guy's going to bifurcate me. He did that to his own penis. You think I'm safe? No. Yeah yeah probably not man no there's a place for this like like uh what's it called when you put like um bbs and stuff under

the skin oh okay stupidity oh no no no i got it it's called sepsis nope no that's the second part called permanent ed that's the one let's go the one. Let's go the other way. Let's go the other way. When you see a girl, right, and all of a sudden, like, her nipples are pierced and her tongue is pierced and maybe her labia is pierced, don't you think, like, oh, I'm in for a wild ride? No. No, not necessarily. I know a girl that's got her, like, clitoris pierced. Uh-huh.

I mean, like, it's pretty cool, actually. Sometimes you can lose that thing in the night. But not anymore. That thing's got a fucking bell on its neck. You'll never miss that thing. The only problem is that thing can get caught on your tooth. If you're really going wild down there, you can pull it away accidentally. And that can hurt everybody. It doesn't feel good for for anyone but no i like like piercings like that on

girls but i don't know that the same is always true like the things that guys find attractive about girls is rarely are rarely the same things that girls find attractive about guys right so like i would we really need more female guests in the lineup if you ask me because i would love to have a woman here and be like and get her point of view on like a dude. We get a girl every seven years. What more do you want? Every seven years. See, there's a joke there to pick at someone, but I'm not going to stoop that low.

OK. You can talk about someone else who only gets a girl every seven years. So anyway, we need one because I'd love to know what a woman would think about. Hey, yeah, if you met a guy and then suddenly he had a pierced taint, what would you think? Oh, a pierced taint. That guy's going to be a wild ride. No, she's going to think, well, I'm going to remember those exits that I checked

down before I got here. Ask politely to go to the bathroom. I leave my purse behind. That won't alarm him and there's nothing in there worth my life. She's gone. There's also like high class women, it sounds. I want to know the kind of girl that sees a taint piercing and thinks it's my lucky day. Oh, shit.

That girl might be sturdier than the guy. There's a chasm of difference between a nipple piercing on a woman and cutting your penis in half vertically. Okay, there's a chasm of difference between a nipple piercing on a woman and cutting your penis in half. OK, that's true. That's true. Like if you like the most normal women, even most kinky, crazy, kooky women, you pull out your mutilated, bifurcated penis like no one is going like it's a it's a gut visceral reaction. You know, when you see somebody who's like disfigured or maimed or burned, you're like, oh, that's a it's a gut visceral reaction you know when you see somebody who's like disfigured or maimed or burned you're like oh that's what you feel like when you see that dick it's not like this guy takes risks it's like oh this guy's a so like a complete psychopath who

like mutilated himself for attention probably uh yeah i don't get that at all the self-mutilation what are the things so and again that's a fine line, right? Between self mutilation and body modification or decoration, whatever you want to think about it. But like, what would you do? What is the, what are the levels that you could see yourself going to? Cause I could definitely get like, I don't know, tattoos for sure. I know blame trees has a bunch.

But what piercings would you get or other kinds of body modification? Would you somehow be open to like, if your wife was is like let's get matching earrings or something like that like like i know that's lame but like yeah like stick with me here like forget the lameness of it and just just look at like i'm open to changing my body like what things are you open i don't i don't think i can't think of any piercing that i think i would look good with what if it became cool though you know how like like like every night how in the 90s, everybody had frosted tips? The new frosted tips is getting your ear pierced.

Everybody's doing it. Woody and I have already done it. We've got that thing from Star Trek where it goes from our nose to our ear. We're going to have a sleepover and we can all pierce each other's ears. And our tongues. Let's do that.

I got the fishing line. If you decide you don't want your ear pierced anymore, you just take it out and it kind of fixes itself. I think. I don't want to draw any more attention to that area of my body, so I don't want a piercing there. That would be embarrassing. They'd be like, look at that fat idiot

with a clear infection. Is that staff? Don't belly buttons get more infected? Yeah, they get more infected in general, right? I would imagine so. It's not a clean area. Lint and stuff gets stuck in there. I wouldn't want to pierce my penis.

I would be afraid that the piercer would get it wrong. Number one, it seems unpleasant. Number two, the frenulum part that you usually see the piercing in that's the really sensitive part of your dick what if he fucks something up and you lose some sensitivity that's not worth it i'll say this every now and then like like when i'm injecting myself in the arm i'll hit a nerve i've only done it like i've only hit the nerve like maybe three times and i do this every single day for like over a year now right yeah you you bump

against it every now and then it's kind of like a funny bone feeling it's like oh there's a little twinge when you fucking hit that thing in the middle it's so goddamn painful but i don't i don't yell out loud but i go like like when you like stub your toe really hard again or just finish i pull it out and immediately jab half an inch to the left or right because it hurts so much. I think the needle is in the middle of the goddamn nerve. It hurts that bad. It's super painful.

I don't even know how nerves work. Aren't there nerves all over? I don't know how nerves work either. They're sort of like feeling the area around them. All I know is that when you hit that thing in the middle it's way more painful than just like hitting an area near it or just an area of muscle like i don't feel it when i just hit solid muscle and nothing else have you seen those

things at museums where it's like an entire human nerve system or an entire human cardiovascular system and it's just like how are they getting that out of there like they're clear you know what i mean like they're a bunch of tiny little capillaries how on earth are they getting that out of the body without like fucking it up and cut do they put you like your body in a tub that dissolves everything but that's what i thought initially but have here's i'm curious about your question have you seen the one where it's like this is what you are this is your consciousness everything else is just the suit that this resides in and it's the brain the brain stem and a good bit of the spinal column and like that's your and the eyeballs like detached it's like this is you everything else is just like your mech suit

and it's like we we're fucking disgusting. We're so fucking nasty. If we saw us in the waters, we would start polluting more. If we knew that Greenpeace would be vomiting over the sides while dumping the oil.

They wouldn't care. It would be so disgusting. It's not talked about enough, but in that movie, The Revenge of Ultron, he spent five minutes on the internet and decided humanity had died. That's the plot of the movie. That's happened in multiple movies. The Marvel film?

Revenge of Ultron or something close to that. Is that why Thanos decides to kill people? Because he went on Twitter for 40 minutes? He was like, I don't think 50% is enough, guys. We're going clean slate.

The real reason Thanos did it in the comics is because he's an incel. Really? Yeah. He's in love with the female embodiment of death and he wants to impress her. This is him buying her a nice ring by killing half of existence.

It is sweet. Did he get laid out of it? No, no. She just kind of giggled and left with Chad. Damn, who's Chad in that situation? Life? Probably one of the Eternals. Probably the one played by that Indian guy whose name we can't pronounce.

He's super jacked. Yeah, the guy who was in uh silicon valley and then he got on roids and his face grew in some weird ways well he's on a crazy transformation yeah he's on a lot of shit yeah he's like he's got cheekbone gains he's it was like you had that bone structure under there what the fuck yeah i think he's like he's on a lot of things. He's like, he's speed running to Joe Rogan head. Speaking of crazy transformations, Kyle, I just want to say congrats on your crazy transformation. You look great. Huge inspiration to me, man. I was already trying to get less fat because I got so fat during quarantine.

I think I have like a tailor build in a sense. I'm kind of like a bear. Bear. Yeah. You know, there we go. Gri strong fat, you know, strong fat. But after seeing you, literally, I'm not kidding. I watched your whole live stream, too. I think it was like four hours or something of you. I watched that from the gym, from the gym. Yeah, I watched it and then I went to the gym and I decided i got up to about 245 or so over the whole like last year and just doing social media you don't leave your room

or anything i got back into training a ton of jujitsu after everything reopened and i was like 240 something and now i walk around about 200 and now i feel way better and the real catalyst for that to me like i've always been relatively like chubby athletic but senior transformation like made me think oh my god i gotta i gotta really do something here so yeah yeah i've done a lot of people i didn't i didn't consider that that was going to happen um during my spike transformation but it turned out that like a lot of people were inspired and that's a really been a really cool like side effect um uh broba is it broba that made the crazy transformation yeah it's a broba he's down like 100 pounds or so so broba's username or username has the word fat in it and uh because he was fat and he has

lost so much that he is like he's gone from like a four to like a seven or something like that like like he's he looked he just looks good all over like he's jacked he's got he's like muscular he's lost how much weight is it like 80 pounds of fat it's got to be almost 100 remember what he used to look like he was straight up fat that's why he went from he went from obese to uh like jack using like just working out and doing intermittent intermittent fasting and like i think i think he does some 72 hour fast like regularly but he's just dropped all the weight and lifted and lifted his own weights and uh it looks great yeah it's cool to see people do that it's funny man you do you do so much and this is like the lifestyle right you don't realize how much it affects people and it's it's so funny

it's because i just want to tell you in person man even like somebody that you probably forgot about me from five years ago but i'm here and i'm inspired bro i didn't forget that i thank you for telling me that it means a lot that's cool you've you've been doing jujitsu and such for a very long time haven't you that's one of your passions yeah it's definitely one of my things um i have most jump in real quick dude there was a time when i was like pub stomping people who either couldn't grapple at all or could only wrestle and didn't know what a submission was. And Overtflow is like, hey, how about me? And it's like, no.

He's like, I'm a purple belt. I'm a little bit bigger than you. Yeah, yeah. That's why, no. I'm trying to make it look good for the cast. He's working on his KD ratio. He doesn't need that shit. I gotta admit something. You think I'm looking for game

battles, asshole? No. You wanna go pro at this? I gotta admit something. At the time that I said that, I was a very small commentator. It was way back in the day. And I said I was a purple belt. That was a lie. I was like a three-stripe blue belt at the time. So I just wanna put that out there. It's something that I've covered up

for a long time. I need to come out with it. What are you now uh i you so blue black belt close uh yeah i'm getting my black belt uh either this month or in april nice in brazilian jiu-jitsu yeah in jiu-jitsu that is crazy i don't know a lot of people might not recognize what a big deal that is that you get a black belt in karate or even judo i'm blushing you know it kind of just means like you've attended for three or four years like it had a black belt in brazilian jiu-jitsu is a rare feat yeah i i don't even know one in a thousand people make it that far like it might be less i got a link for amazon if anybody wants to 20 bucks 20 bucks yeah he's talking like this shit's rare. $15.

Oh, my God. You know when your dad tells you something and you're like, oh, man, he's proud of me? It's kind of how I feel right now. Thank you, Woody. I appreciate it. If you see me in a hotel lobby or something, don't hit me. I don't want this. Never that.

Never that. What is the process like of getting it? My answer is still no. Remember that. What is the process like of getting it? My answer is still no. Is it a number of wins you have to get against other black belts for the guy to hand it out? The easiest way to describe it is the belt is knowledge and the stripes are time.

It's kind of the easiest way to describe it. I think that's a fair description. I started in 2007, but I was in high school at the time. I'm the same age as Taylor. I'm 30. I was in high school at the time. So I'm the same age as Taylor. I'm 30. I was in high school at the time, so I just never was consistent with it. As soon as I graduated high school, I had not much going on. So I started training jujitsu seriously in 2010.

And now here we are in 2022. And it's crazy. I don't feel black belt level necessarily but then if i if i look at any relation to the the tournaments i've won or the people i go against uh the only people that really catch me are black belts so i must be like doing decent um but yeah it's i literally i'm wearing a jiu-jitsu shirt right now i got you this little guy is me in here me in a jiu-jitsu uniform my dad got it for me oh that's awesome yeah it's a pretty cool little thing so yeah i love, I love jiu-jitsu, man. It's crazy to me. It's insane. Oh, God.

Congratulations. That's awesome. Yeah, that's awesome. When you see someone else wearing a black belt, if they had purchased one, is that like stolen valor? Would you be offended? I would have to challenge them for my honor on the spot. What if they said they didn't want to waste their time with someone who hasn't even attained the levels that they've trained with Shaolin monks and they're just not going to waste their time with someone who's just barely a black belt? I don't fight anymore since the incident. Those type of people.

Those kind of guys. Yeah. The incident is where i got my ass kicked pretending to know how to fight yeah it was that last time i took that amazon black belt and wore it last time i had a black belt on my waist one on my head two on each wrist who will try to convince you that they don't fight because their techniques are so deadly that if they were to use it, like, look, I would fight you and I would win, but you would die

and I'd get in trouble because, you know, I do this special death touch thing. Pull your heart right out of your chest, man. Yeah. It's funny. It's funny you guys should mention buying this stuff because when I was younger... Oh, they're Hansa registered weapons. Oh, Hansa registered weapons. I love that line from fucking...

It's Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. But Bruce Lee was like, I would bite you, but my hands are registered as deadly weapons. I accidentally kill you in a fight, I go to jail. He's like, anybody accidentally kills somebody in a fight,

they go to jail. It's called manslaughter. I do not like the people that go around saying, yeah, I'm registered as a deadly deadly weapon, et cetera, et cetera. That's just not true. It's just not a true thing. Perhaps it could be used against a court. Like if I go to choke somebody, they could bring up, hey, this guy's black belt at hugging people.

Like they could bring that up. You know, that's the whole premise of Con Air is that Nick Cage was such a fucking badass that those guys that were roughing up his girlfriend at that girlfriend at that bar he had no business like like like throwing down with him because he's so goddamn deadly because he killed them both with his bare hands there's something to be said for that though like i've always felt like like uh what's the guy's name from miami is it jorge rivera i don't know that's a baseball player masvidal is who i'm looking for jorge masvidal i guess got into a fight with people at a bar and that in itself is not cool to me right he should be self-confident and not have to prove it that would be the ideal version of a pro fighter to me but i can also understand that you also can't just pick a fight you can't win and act like you're immune from consequences because of it

okay cool then he goes into the bathroom and he sees another guy in there and just on sight knocks him the fuck out. And they're like, how did you know he was even with the other ones? He's like, I didn't. I couldn't take that chance. I have no problem with that. I have no problem with that.

The guy could have been... I've been in the same situation in Tarkov many times. Hallways full of bad guys. You've killed all of them you saw. You run to the bathroom to start healing the blood that's gushing out of you, and there's another guy in that bathroom.

He looks just like your buddy, but you can't be fucking sure, and there's so much. You've got to kill him too. They've all got – yeah, you team kill. Hey, man, it's understandable. Well, he takes down some friendlies, you team kill. Hey, man. It's understandable. He team kills. Well, he takes down some friendlies, but he never gets caught off sides. I'll tell you that.

God damn for sure. Nobody's catching. He took out the guy. The alpha offered him a mint right next to the duty. Not everybody. He's like, he's trying to get in the stall to get a shit. You guys know Ryan Hall, the MMA fighterma fighter right yeah i love ryan hall right he's a grappler right leg specialist okay yeah yeah i know hit bj pin with this crazy like leg lock or whatever but there's a video of him online somewhere of him

eating pizza have you seen it and he takes the guy he takes the guy down and just kind of sits on him while like he's like hey don't like make sure the pizza doesn't get cold or something that's not how it starts the guy walked he's drunk drunk very drunk and he goes in the diner i'll call it and he's being an asshole total he's being an asshole and ryan hall is not even making eye contact he's just eating he's just he's paying no attention to this guy who's being an asshole. And Ryan Hall is not even making eye contact. He's just eating. He's just eating. He's paying no attention to this guy who's being animated and kind of picking on him. And the whole table is like, you don't know what you're doing.

That's Ryan Hall. That's fucking Ryan Hall, professional fighter in the UFC. Everybody at the table is afraid of that guy. Yeah, yeah. If you were to see me sit next to ryan hall you would probably think i could beat him in a fight you would be very wrong but he is not an intimidating looking dude he looks like like he might be a librarian or something but he's a very much a badass can you find a picture of ryan halzak and uh and he ignores him and ignores him and ignores him until

eventually he can't be ignored anymore he might have started touching him or touching his plate or something. I forget the details. And Ryan Hall very casually gets his hands on the guy, takes him down, puts him in a position where the guy is helpless. And the dude's – look at that guy. He's one of the baddest guys in the world. Find a picture of him in a shirt. It looks even better. Yeah.

He looks really skinny his biceps are uh impressive to me like if you look carefully in that picture but yeah yeah but um in a shirt he's a big guy you don't see much and his friend this is the bad guy's friend is like stop being an asshole he's being nice to you right now. He could do anything he wants. Because he could. I'm watching this clip right now of Ryan Hall handling the pizza thing. And I can feel for him that he's like, he really is sitting in a way like, please let me eat my pizza, please.

Please let me eat my pizza. He probably earned that pizza. Double legs. He doesn't even go for for a sneak attack or anything. He just fully, what's it called, telegraphing a punch. He just telegraphs the slowest double-leg takedown of all time as though

he's taking out the trash like a chore. Look at him. Tell me you don't think... You would be confused into thinking that guy can't defend himself. Look at his ear. Not me, don't think you would be confused into thinking that guy can't defend himself. Look at his ear. Not me, though, because I'd see those ears and know that he could be on me like a fucking

spider monkey if he wanted to. Look at that guy. He's wiry as fuck, but you know he'd just be so strong if he put his hands on you. Yeah. So he's an athlete who competes in weight class. He would squeeze you what you thought was really hard and then he would start cinching up. Right?

I was joking. Eat your pizza, man. Third-degree black belt. Third-degree black belt, it says. It's crazy how much of a specialist he is. And speaking of UFC fighters, I just put something in the chat. I thought that this would be cool to you, Woody, and also Kyle. And not Taylor, though, because he doesn't like this.

I just train with a bunch of ufc fighters the most prominent one probably being jessica andrage oh that's cool yeah super cool she's she's awesome super sweet way small they're always like oh she's itty bitty she's itty bitty you always think in your head that these people are going to be it's kind of like the same thing when you uh are playing online with a guy and he's crushing and call the duty pub stomper and then you meet him in real life you're like oh it's not really entirely yeah it's much smaller than i thought you look so big on tv he was so big and strong and nazi zombies exactly she's great she's awesome at jujitsu black belt very good super technical and super super nice and tiny also i have a story about a bunch of black belts getting picked on at a bar for my friend's birthday, if you want to hear it. How did that go?

Yes. Oh, very well. Well, the group that picked on us were other black belts. Turns out they were the real Cobra Kai. So these guys, I was out with a couple of my friends, like maybe about 10 people. We're out for my friend's birthday, and he's one of the lead black belts at our gym. This was a few years ago. And we go out for his birthday.

It's probably 2 a.m. at this point. He's completely inebriated. We're going to walk him back to his room. And the whole table is nothing but either, like, bouncers or high-level jiu-jitsu guys, so, like, brown belts, black belts. And the bouncers are not the big bouncers that you would expect. They're kind of like the, uh, the smaller guys, the ones that people typically don't mess with if you're in a club,

because you're like, yo, if you're small and you're a bouncer, probably, you know, something's going on. Right. So we, uh, we're all out. We decided to walk my one friend home as we're leaving. My friend is so drunk that he kind of stumbles backwards into a group of kind of gangster guys. I don't know how to describe these guys. Jerseys on, tattoos, gangster fellows.

There's probably about four or five of them. The Asian mafia. I've seen these guys. Exactly. It was the Yakuza. A lot of missing fingers in the group. It was like a mixture of Mexican and white guys, I would say. With all tatted, all kind of the attitude type guys.

And I apologize. I'm like, hey, sorry, my friend. It's his birthday. We're just going to walk him home. Sorry about that, guys. And nothing really happened. He just kind of bumped into them. So I leave.

I walk this guy back to his room with my other friend. We drop him off. We come back. And apparently these guys had decided to bully the other guys at the table after they were already they were rude to me when i left when i said when i apologized they were like yeah you know get out of here blah blah i'm like no problem i'm leaving you know and we come back and all i all i catch a glimpse of because we come back at the at the tail end of this apparently one of the they when they left the three guys uh confronted two of the

guys that were at the table with us. The brown belt that we were with punched one guy. I guess he knocked him down. But what I saw was my friend who's a black belt, skinny kid, like unassuming Ryan Hall type. I saw him double leg one guy, throw him on his head, take the other guy, toss him down, and just get on top and start beating him before security came over and broke it up. And it's like the two guys that you picked on was a balding older man and a skinny kid. And these guys beat up three gangster guys.

Come on, man. After I was so nice, I was like, I apologize. I offered them... That's so shitty, yeah. They waited until you left. They waited until you left. That's a shitty position for a bouncer to be in, I'm thinking about.

If I'm a bouncer and I see two people start to fight, I want to see them like throw in punches like this. Like if I'm a bouncer and I see two guys teeing off with power, I'm like, guys, come on. Come on. Get out. Get out of here. You two. He's like, Taylor, get in there and stop it. I'm a fight expert.

And this is petering out. Taylor's just eating Cheez-Its like watching the whole thing. to he's like taylor get in there and stop it ah you've got here i go i'm a fight expert and this is petering out taylor's just eating cheese it's like watching the whole thing come on guys there's a video actually speaking of that same situation in a way woody's probably i would assume woody's seen it it's a video of two guys getting in a fight at like target over black friday and the one guy takes the other guy down. He starts like jujitsu in this guy, like passes a guard, does this. The other guy apparently also knows jujitsu,

like sweeps him and they end up like kind of just stopping the fight. Cause they're like, it's like, I want to see if we can find this video. It's actually, I was trying to pub stomp. So have a good, best of luck to you. Videos get us claimed every time. Now it's actually i was trying to pub stomp so have a good best of luck to you

videos get us claimed every time now it's not what it used to be oh yeah well it's very funny if you haven't seen i suggested it's like jujitsu versus jujitsu at target or something target target's not a venue you see that off have you seen the girl fight where they're going at it like in a field or something like that and the one girl fucking double legs the other, throws her an arm bar, and breaks her fucking arm. No, I have not. Good guy. This sounds familiar, but I cannot say for sure.

So I don't know a ton about Jits, but it seems to me that when you get someone an arm bar, even in competition, they don't just jerk it for the break. They're going for the tap. She broke this girl's arm. She didn't want to tap. She wanted to girl's arm. She didn't want to tap. She wanted to break her arm so she could beat her more severely. Ronda Rousey liked breaking arms too.

She snapped. You heard it pop in the video. What was his name? Sorry to interrupt, but before I forget, Husamar Palhares. You guys remember him? He got into a lot of shit because he straight up just enjoyed breaking people's legs.

What an asshole. He did a move called a knee bar. You kind of hug the guy's knee and extend your back and it causes it to bend the wrong way. The thing is, it's not super painful but it's super damaging. Everything just breaks and rips at the same

time. What would happen is the other guy would start tapping and he wouldn't stop he wouldn't stop and the ref would like sort of hold him by the shoulders and stuff try to break it apart he's not yeah and the ref would physically try to peel him apart and he still wouldn't stop he was still trying to injure your ligaments it was it was his knee bars, heel hooks, mainly. I thought something was wrong with him. No offense. It was Amar Palharris.

Don't rip my legs off. I think something was wrong. He was in the UFC doing this? Yes. He was in the UFC for doing it and he continued to do it. He won a title in Strikeforce or something and then got stripped

because he would win and then wouldn't let go of the shit. He went up against another guy. He'd be like somewhere else, not in the fight, just like, holy, this guy is – Dude, I don't think he did that. I mean, I think that's something – nobody does that normally. Why did you keep trying to destroy his leg? You know, I was thinking about other things. I was distracted.

You know, you can't blame me. My mind was a million miles away he goes into it as a highly regarded grappler as well so yeah let all right i want to see this this guy's your size this guy's skilled you know try this shit against jake shields i want to see it he clawed fucking jake shields eyes all 15 minutes and still won the fight if you watch it like jake's eyes it looks like he's a zombie infected or something like he and he's it's not subtle like like sometimes there's a thumb in the eye and you're like ah you know what like loose fingers they find their ways in the darndest

places not this he is like like a girl clawing at eyes. It's totally intentional. About five years ago? Okay. I hate it. It really is the beginning of a sport when this stuff happened five years ago.

Look at Jake Shields' eyes. Look at that. That's not from punches. That's just from claws. It looks like he picked up a non-friendly cat. And it ended up getting him. Thanks, Zach. I'm glad you found that. That's so bad.

That's funnier than I thought it would be. In a bad way. That guy's a real piece. Speaking of brutal fight videos online, there's a video I saw of a club in Eastern Europe or something. And it's like a CCTV camera and it's in a strip club. And some guy near the bathroom entrance, you know, is clearly very drunk and, you know, being loud and rowdy. This other guy comes over, knocks him out like cold knocks him out and

then the guy who knocked him out as he's laying there he gets on top of the guy and breaks both of his arms as he's knocked out he knocks him out and then gets on top of him and breaks one of his arms turns breaks the other arm and there's just a man laying there knocked out with two broken arms and it's like oh no this is and of course you like go in like the the comments or whatever and it's a bunch of like unverifiable bullshit where they're like apparently he was a rapist and other people are like no he was a drug dealer who sold him bad drugs like no he was part of the eastern ukraine mafia and this other and it's like no that looks like a drunk guy who just got both of his arms breaking both of your arms

that's what an asshole that's like something to me that's just like so obviously so like he was actually despicable like actually disgusting i feel like i'm at a point too with i live in las vegas so i i see some wild stuff happen occasionally and i feel like i'm at this weird point now too where um if i saw something like that i feel like i have and i think everybody has a moral obligation to step in but i don't want to get involved with anything but i feel at this point man when you see stuff like that happen it's like if somebody doesn't step in that's like disgusting to me you know oh i would zero percent chance i'm stepping in i don't want to be the second i don't want to be the third and fourth arms no i'm sorry like like there was a there was a i was at walmart one

time um just like this was back when i was uh i don't have no nice way to put i was just fat as shit so i was just incredibly out of shape like winded going up the stairs out of shape and um i recall like sitting there i think i was eating bojangles just a cajun filet biscuit like a fat ass with like mayonnaise and lard on it and i'm sitting there eating it and i hear like a woman screaming and i'm looking around i'm like what the fuck's going on and i'm sitting there just fucking like biscuit crumbs in my beard yeah like and there's this woman there's this there's this man trying to like i think it was like an ex-boyfriend or something uh trying to break

in not like break in forcibly but trying to like i don't know just talk forcibly like trying to get in this woman's car he wasn't like breaking the window or anything and she's like screaming like help i like i don't want to talk to this guy help and he's like still trying to get in i'm just watching this whole thing yeah just eating a fucking biscuit just like watching it all and i'm like i could help but by the time i my fat ass gets over there i'm winded like it's over hold up there's an ending to the story yeah uh the cop showed up and then he got in the car and forced her to drive the cop showed up like a minute after I decided I wasn't going to do anything.

Okay. Well, that kind of works. Okay, good. Good job. Dude. Talking about interfering.

One of my favorite videos on the internet is there are like five girls beating up one. I think it happens in China or Asia somewhere. Everyone's Asian and they're not like having the restraint you'd expect if five people beat up one you'd think that after a short period of time yeah they'd be like well we kind of made our point right she's cowering protecting herself she offers no offense at all she's defeated you won you won Claim your victory and do your celebration. Why are you still beating this woman?

Are you trying to kill her or maim her? What the fuck is happening here? And it goes on for some period of time. And it's like, is anyone going to help her? And to my head, the soundtrack of I Need a Hero starts playing. When this guy flies in. One man against five women these five women are fucked wait is that the guy who enters the battlefield with a leaping kick yeah okay that's a great video yeah and these five women by the way they don't realize they're

not gonna win they're still engaging he will like defeat one and she'll collect herself and come back in the fight and and but he's he's hitting them like they're men oh dude he is throwing punches the way you can only do against a woman no defense whatsoever every bit of strength jaw sticking out almost daring you think like never ever hit a what dude this was the situation where you do like he's defending somebody they're gonna kill that girl they were getting the shit out of her yeah they were beating the shit was that guy he was a random guy right i don't know the backstory yeah i don't yeah but it was in like the middle of a restaurant. Like a

hibachi restaurant or something like that. Maybe not hibachi, but yeah, that's a great fucking video. Just to enter the fight with a chest kick to a woman. Just boom! And then she's off screen. She's out for the

rest of the video. now it's one on four hilarious so apparently it may have been yeah there's another video like that where it's a boyfriend and his girlfriend's getting beat up like outside of a club it's the same situation four or five girls beating this one girl up and the guy comes in he's like he's like a short like a guy that probably wouldn't beat any of us up, you know? And he comes in and he just KOs all these girls and takes his girlfriend and leaves. It's like, yeah, good, good. Don't hit girls.

But for that, yeah, it's going to happen like that. Yeah. Speaking of fights. I love fight videos online. As long as I love fight videos online, but I don't like the head kick kind of end to all of them. Like when someone gets their clock cleaned, it's like, OK, it's over. And then you see like the head stomps and the curb stomping and using like they're the toe of their like the way you're not supposed to kick a soccer ball, like doing that to someone's temple when they're already knocked out.

Every time I see that, it's like this good fight video just became a snuff film because that person's likely dead. I do watch them, but I really can't watch those type of things. It really upsets me. I don't like watching. I will watch them out of morbid curiosity sometimes. Sometimes it gets too morbid, and then I go back to the Ryan

Hall video where he calmly takes the guy down and eats pizza. Dude, I will make up backstories in my head as i'm watching violent videos to rationalize what i'm watching like it'll be like that guy is a rapist is there any evidence of this whatsoever no but but have you seen the matt sarah video love it no i don't think so i don't know if I can do the same play-by-play, but it's reminiscent of the Ryan Hall video. Is that better, I think, even? He's in just as much control. And Matt Serra's doing this?

Yeah, Matt Serra against Random. And I think he even warns the guy, like, look, look, look. You still have a chance to walk away. I'm not the one. I'm not the one you want, if I recall. It's like he gives him some sort of overt float. Do you recall this? Yeah.

So he's at a buffet. I believe he's at Red Rock here in Vegas. And he's at a buffet with everybody. And this drunk guy's being loud and obnoxious. I believe that maybe he had an altercation with one of the waitresses or something, even, too. And he was just in there being obnoxious. Matt Serra takes this guy down, gets gets him out gives him a couple slaps he doesn't even hit him and he's very Italian

so Taylor you're at a buffet you double like somebody you're in mount you give him a couple slaps tell him to relax and you're Italian go I'm watching the video right now it really it really is funny like somehow this guy got so mad that he he punched

his own shirt off and he's laying on his back and matt sarah's like like almost looks embarrassed at having to get involved he's sitting on top you know just just blocking this guy's full strength punches like he's not even giving it a mind just like you know you know how it is guys right you know how it is when you're a professional fighter the rest of you the thing about matt sarah is uh he's incredibly good at jujitsu but that motherfucker can punch too like he can he knocked gsp out i mean he did um dude this dude is like a truck this dude is lucky as shit that matt sarah decided not to hit him seriously oh for sure and but that's what you get when you get a controlled person.

And that, to me, is the type of video that I want to see. I like that one, yeah. A lot of control. It makes you feel good. Yeah. Yeah, because you're putting yourself in there. Oh, yeah. And you're Matt Sarah in that situation.

I put myself in there. I'm the rowdy pizza guy. I need to know how to run. This is not a pizza. Can that be a character in a video game the rowdy pizza guy boxing like my tyson punch out i think it was called but it should just be all internet people right like you know the first guy you face is that angry bagel person the first guy you face the first guy you face should be one of the Paul brothers because they look like fucking Glass Joe.

Wow. I don't know. They're pretty big, though. You don't want to start. If I fight either of the Paul brothers, I'm having a bad day. Yeah, they're going to beat the shit out of me. They're not bad. And they're good. And speaking of that, that's an excellent transition. Wow. Yes, I did fight on the first Logan Paul.

Yeah, I know. I know. I was going to ask you. I have it written down as a topic. How are the bright lights? I know it's not your first competition, but it must be your biggest one. Oh, well, here we go. What are you ready? So I'm a wrestler, jujitsu, judo kind of guy. I never really had boxed before. I've done like I've I've done MMA sparring, which I mostly just rely on like jujitsu for that. Right. I'll do a fake a jab and then takedown. The boxing thing, I didn't get the contract until about a month out to go do that. And so it was, I didn't have a ton of time to train, even though I had kind of put it

out into the ether and talked about it. It was never confirmed until about a month out. But I ended up fighting FaZe Sensei, who is a part of FaZe Clan. He's like, was Tommy, the main owner, Tempur's Sensei back in the day and still is. But I introduced Sensei to KSI at a party in Boston. They ended up training together. And then when this whole fight card came about, Sensei could not find an opponent. He was going to fight a couple of guys. I don't know if I'm allowed to name them, but they're big fight guys on YouTube. They're like very big millions of followers for training professional fighters on YouTube.

And he was set to fight these guys, and they both pulled out. So because of that, and I knew he wanted to fight, I called up JJ. I called up KSI. I called up Sensei. And I was living with Keemstar at the time. And I called them up. I talked to Keem about it. He would promote it. Sensei is like my friend. And at the time. And I called him up. I talked to Keem about it. He would promote it.

Sensei is like my friend. And at the time, me and him had the same following count. It ended up getting put together. JJ loved the idea. So we put it all together, ended up fighting. And yes, that was my first time. I had fought before in front of like, I had grappled before in front of about 1500 people.

But over there in Manchester Arena, I think they sold out with 22,000 seats, I believe. And I got to say that was, uh, that was, it really does take a lot out of you. You know, it is a, it is a weird thing to walk out there and there's that many people like screaming and yelling and recognizing you. It's really a, a huge distraction from the fact that you're about to get punched, punched in the eye, you know uh it's crazy but it was it was definitely a uh an insane event i brought my dad out there he was my water guy i asked him like like the month before i'm like hey dad you want to come with me to uh uh manchester i'm gonna have a boxing fight he's like yeah sure okay and we get there and he opens

up the curtain and sees all the people and he starts like tearing up and he looks back at me he's like wow it's really a it's big thing huh so there's like pictures of me and my dad and then i'll throw one in the chat but it was definitely crazy and at the time i think that face sensei would have cleaned up everybody on the card he would have beat everybody both of of the Paul brothers, KSI, everybody. And he was the only professional fighter at the time as well. He was the only pro fighter. Nobody would fight him. I took that.

And of course, I fought a professional fighter. You know, I don't know what he bought for me. I thought it was fun, though. I thought you hung in there. Did you lose by decision? I lost in the last six seconds via liver shot TKO. For months, my whole comment section was FaZe liver and i was like thanks guys man liver shots liver liver shots are no fucking joke man um i've never been taken out by a liver shot have you have i yeah uh i used to box when i was younger but never never hit really in the body uh big

target up here so um but uh no i mean just from watching like uh like boss ruden i think was a big liver shot guy he would just knee guys in the liver they'd collapse and he'd be like that that shot broke his liver anyway you know doing doing commentary. Well, it's a really important organ, and you kind of need it for everything. Yeah, for real. I put a couple of links in the chat just to some of the pictures. I don't know if you want me to show it for funsies. But I'm supposed to actually – I've been in talks to fight. I was supposed to fight at the Staples Center, which is an crypto.com center.

I was supposed to fight at for logan paul versus k2 um in 2019 but they hit me up like 10s out because sensei broke a rib and so um it was kind of too soon for me i had to cut a bunch away and they didn't offer me um enough for me to really think really like be motivated and unfortunately in that amount of time it's breaking up so bad it's difficult to hear your words and your videos hardly moving. Oh shoot. Yeah, it might be lagging a little bit. Yeah, it got real bad suddenly.

Is it? Is it so bad? My guess is you have tabs open. Do you have like 19 tabs open because you're doing all these links? Yes. Hold on. It'll be funny if as he closes tabs, he gets slightly better. Slightly better?

With each one, he's going to improve. I think Chiz has 128 gigs of RAM just so he can never be slowed down by Chrome. Have you ever seen his browser open? He uses his tabs to manage his to-do list and such. He uses his tabs to manage all of existence, apparently. Because he has like 400 tabs. And that's not a big exaggeration.

It's probably 150, 200. It could be. Is that better? Not yet. No? I would advise a restart. I would say it's a 2 out of 10. If you were on the moon, this would be

unacceptable. This is like a 98 chat room. Yeah, Neil Armstrong did better than this. Alright. You can come back. I'm going to reset my internet then. I'd advise probably your browser.

I'd do everything. yeah i do everything though okay okay maybe i'm on the wrong page can't miss then i'm gonna reset browser if it's not fixed i'm gonna start to fix the internet cool okay playing truth what was your first tattoo first tattoo um where'd you put it? Right here. What does it say? Fight off your demons. Okay. Reference to my favorite band. It was a buddy of mine who was doing his first tattoo. You can't really fuck up text.

It's just bold text. Just do it. Get your practice in. You can fuck it up. No rag rags. you oh yeah one misspelling and uh i i trusted spelling uh but yeah you could fuck it up like that but no um he was he was just getting started he's been tattooing for 11 years now i think um and that was one of the first ones he did. So, I kind of helped him get his start a little bit. He ended up doing this one right here,

which is Hereditary. Not sure if you guys have seen that movie. Yeah. You put that demon shit on you. Yeah. On your one arm, it says, fight your demons or some shit. And the other, you've literally got some demonology. Yeah, it's the legit payment some demonology it's just yeah it's a

it's the like legit payment crest yeah but it's okay i don't just in case i'm not gonna put any demon stuff on me there's no way to make a good faith case to jesus when you're dead if the worst thing is look we always talk about how like look we don't believe in goblins and nonsense right but there's that like tiny infinitesimal percentage it's like when a Look, we always talk about how we don't believe in goblins and nonsense, right? But there's that tiny, infinitesimal percentage. It's like when a loved one gets sick and you pray to God. Even though, right? There's that shit.

If you're there, listen up. It's one of those. And sometimes it can go the other way. You go down a dark basement. You can be like, if you're there, listen up. I'm just coming in. I just want to get some fabric softener. I'm right out.

You keep seeing shit going on. Have you seen that movie Hereditary Taylor? You know what I've done? It's so scary. My wife's gotten scared before and she's been like, Taylor, go check the basement in the middle of the night and I'll get a baseball bat. And I was like, this was like a weekend night. I was drunk and I was starting to go down the stairs. I'm like, if I find you, I'm going to rape you. And then my wife started laughing and I was laughing it was i would love just to hear just to hear scurrying out like the door like eight eight sets of footsteps just so afraid you've broken into the wrong rapist's house i like to imagine i like to imagine someone's

broken into my mom's house saw those those meat jars, and just backed the fuck out. Got the fuck out. You're like, oh, so. I'm sorry, Kyle. Go ahead. The hereditary demon stuff. I have seen hereditary. Yeah. Super good.

Having seen hereditary, would you tempt fate enough to put that nonsense on your hand? No, it's not nonsense. It looks fucking cool. Let me just say that. I didn't like the movie enough to put it on there i thought it was all right so i think the movie's excellent i like that director uh his name escapes ari ari aster i believe yeah yeah um i feel so bad for the girl in it like with the no i was so glad when she got when when she died i was so happy um that girl looks like that in real life apparently

and no one ever and no one ever ended her throughout her young existence like i don't she has the the same thing as as dusted from stranger things whatever that's called uh yeah yeah the no syndrome there's like i don't even think i don't think they have snaggle teeth i think like they don't have their teeth yeah take a while to come in and they're all it's cranial i remember like i remember watching that movie and being like damn this girl's killing it but like she's got to live every day with that face yeah i'm like very unfortunate with that disorder or disability whatever not disability uh yeah have you seen her like and like there's no way to like pretty that

particular disorder up like the kid like the guy, he looks kind of quirky and like, ha ha, that's that funny little kid. But the girl, I saw her at the Oscars or something and wearing a dress. You can't pretty that up. That's a rough look. But that movie is very unsettling. What's her name again? Millie Shapiro

it looks like is her name. That's the Stranger Things kid. Oh, he does have teeth. He's got some teeth. Well, he's got stuff in his mouth. You can totally pretty that up, right? Taylor, you're a hockey fan. That's the guy. I follow that. I do understand.

As a guy who's seen enough hockey players missing teeth, they actually do a pretty good job of putting in a clip in of whatever it's called. So the issue isn't the lack of teeth or an abundance of teeth either there's a mission abundance of teeth she has teeth but they're not human teeth i've seen some people who had too many fucking teeth you know you have they smile and they're like ah it the worst is if you got too much gum like if

you've got way too much gum i've seen pretty beautiful women who had way too much no it's not the worst but but it's funny it is i feel that my best friend growing up had too much gum and we all nicknamed him jaws there was this girl in high school we called her as she's a really pretty girl really popular girl so i didn't feel too bad for calling her this but me and my buddy called her Gator Mouth because she had this really wide smile like wide wide not because she attacked neighborhood dogs

sometimes redheads but she had a really big mouth and then big, like a lot of teeth I need a woman like that I was going to say a lot of teeth big teeth we'll call them big teeth I need a woman like that. I was going to say. A lot of teeth? A lot of teeth. Big teeth, we'll call them.

Big teeth. All right. Chompers. To Kyle's point, it's not the teeth thing. It's like the different. Her skull is misshapen. It's the skull. What's her name?

Her name is Millie Shapiro. Thank you. Yeah. It's borderline down syndrome. She's got one of those faces. It's bad. In the movie, she does that. They do a lot of close-ups on her face, and she does that shit,

and it's very unsettling throughout the movie. They sort of build this sort of... You're just not comfortable with anything you're seeing. You never relax and don't have a little bit of apprehension going on throughout the whole fucking thing. And then the last 20 minutes when shit's falling apart, it's real, real goddamn wild.

She's a good actress. That's her best angle ever. What are you talking about? This girl's fine. You're just mean. This is also from when she was younger than Hereditary, think right yeah yeah i'll say this i hope whatever she has isn't hereditary that's the sequel it's just her

you know it's just her giving birth or something yeah yeah that's she doesn't look that bad in in like i'm gonna look here at myself oh that's a bullshit picture that's a bullshit picture what'd you do no that's just on google maybe it could be like there you go yeah oh i think that's her sister actually yeah yeah like that when i this movie it made me like pretty sister even though she was killing it playing the scary little girl like every time i would see her like it made me sad thinking about like her having to live with whatever that is you know what i mean whereas like the stranger things get people are a lot more forgiving to guys for stuff like this than women they used makeup to give her that

double bag thing i think i don't think so it's not the double bag thing i might it's the bone structure it's a very it's a bird i'm not trying to spend 20 minutes here making fun of this ugly child but like what he's trying to act like there's nothing wrong with her and i i think he's baiting me but that's not his style i feel like he's just gonna keep going actually i think she's kind of hot and i'm getting to the point where i'm like this disgusting some human fucking animal could have been chopped out at birth and cast onto the rocks. Woody just keeps casting his line to the same area of the pond and he keeps getting a bite.

Man, Kyle likes making fun of kids. She's got a very bird-like face. I guess that's the best way to put it. Yeah, sick bird. Birds are pretty. Nothing wrong with looking like a bird. Sick bird. Birds are pretty. Nothing wrong with looking like a bird. Nothing wrong. Especially the majestic owl.

The owl is the best bird. Owl's the best bird. It is. It's a good bird. I like owls even more now that I know that them and crows have like a feud. No matter where they are are crows and owls hate each other

I feel like that's lions and hyenas like one is clearly better than the other well I mean the way it would go is like apparently like I mean if one owl finds a crow that crow is fucked the crow is dead the owls are much bigger but a bunch of crows

a murder of crows a murder of crows really a bunch of really intelligent bunch of crows a murder of crows yeah such a cool name bunch what did you graduate from eighth grade and stop do they have like other other crime names like a rape of jackals rape is a dolphin a rape of dolphins that's a pod i grew up but i get your joke um the uh i grew up hunting crows so i know a little about them um like like we would get up at the they're the they're the most intelligent thing i've ever hunted i think way smarter than fucking deer deer tardis crows like crows have like a word for people like like they send one crow in to scout the area out like first of all we're using like a game caller this loud speaker that's playing a recording and the recording you use for crows there's like three or four but like the ones that work really well is um one um one crow either injured and he sounds

really sad he's like whimpering almost and uh they love they'll come to that to help their buddy but then there's one where it's like it's like 30 crows fighting an owl and beating the shit out of it. The owl is making this really high pitch sort of noise and all the crows are just like, fuck yeah, get him, get him, get him. You play that loud as shit and then you slowly

lower the volume over the course of three minutes and you bring them in and they'll stay at range and they'll send one guy of at range and they'll send one guy in they'll send dopey and dopey will fly and i kind of look around and you've got to zap him you've got to zap dopey or you've got to hide or he'll get back and tell him yeah if he if he sees you or if you shoot at him and miss he'll go back and be like fucking run it was a trap and they'll literally leave and and the hunt's over you've got to like find

a new location you've got to leave that place and drive somewhere else but if you zap him they're like well eddie must be in a fight we hear we can hear it let's go buddy come on everyone and they'll come two or three at a time and you're just like wearing them out all day it's a ton of fun what do you do with crows once you kill them what do you mean like like you don't think what do you think like you asking if i do weird shit yeah i'm asking how tight that because i'm talking about how a young boy bonded with his father over the course of years yeah jesus you're trying to take it to this weird dead crows you're right i shouldn't have asked well if you take one prisoner you can you can make him like you can like rough him up a little bit and he'll like yell at the others and they'll come to that too stockholm syndrome kind of skinny you turn him out you threaten him slap him around

a little he'll talk i didn't make him walk around with his uh claw in your pocket yeah we would do that too we put decoys out um i i have an owl decoy that like flaps its wings and a bunch of crows that you just like sit around it that also flap their wings you it's it's a whole uh rigmarole we built one of those once we took it like a yard owl that you could buy it if it's just like stationary yeah and we'll have motors make its wings flat i'm like i'm like dad you know the motorized one's like $150. He's over there putting wires together. I'm like, this one will be better. This is 12-volt.

Who's carrying the car battery? Who's carrying the car battery? Did you ever... What a mess. It's flapping. It takes off. The car battery on his back. Did you ever stuff them?

Did you ever do taxidermy with them? We stuffed them, all right. Oh, yeah. I knew when I said that, somebody was going to make that joke once you start stuffing them the rest of the crows come running yeah no we um we always we taxidermy deer if we shot them and they were like big impressive deer yeah or like the first deer i ever killed with a bow i taxidermy that one. Other than that, the only thing I ever remember growing up, my dad had a stuffed fox. And they had done this thing where

if you pushed down on the tail, it was like a switch. And inside the fox, they had put some sort of a sound effect thing. And it would go, and as a kid, that's the funniest shit ever. There's a realistic fox that makes a silly noise when you walk by it. I thought you were going to say it's a switch and it triggers like the billy bass on the wall and it

starts oh if the fox turned its head yeah take me to the river that would be we're talking about stuff and birds right yeah i think yeah you could look at the size of a bird's egg and determine whether or not you could have sex with it. And I bet it's more birds than you think. I mean, you could have sex with any bird you're stronger than. But like a robin, for example, that egg is too small for me. Well, you couldn't fuck a robin. Yeah, but how big is an owl egg?

Chicken egg. Chickens are down. Chickens are DTF. This is just widely known. This is how STDs start. This is how COVID started. Did HIV actually come from someone fucking a monkey, or is that like a meme that's become history?

The meme I always heard was they ate a monkey brain. I always heard fuck a monkey. I heard fuck a monkey. We're split. See, a generational thing. I heard both. You know what? We're going fuck a monkey. I heard fuck a monkey. We're split. See, a generational thing. I heard both. You know what? We're going fuck the monkey.

I've always heard that. I just never believed it. Yeah. Not that a person wouldn't fuck a monkey, just that the monkey wouldn't allow it. Yeah. Oh, yeah, like the monkey is way stronger than you. It's going to fuck you up if it doesn't want you messing with it.

What if the monkey was down? It had to have been down because it didn't kill the guy who then spread AIDS. What I'm saying is it's unlikely that... Okay. I think we missed a turn somewhere. I hope nobody fucked a monkey, though. What kind of monkey would you fuck?

What is the most attractive of the great apes? There's a lot of hair there. Woody, what do you think? Hairless chief. Which of the great apes is the sexiest? Is that the core of the question? Yeah, yeah. I like the way baboons present.

Yeah, I like that big flat face the orangutans have. Yeah, but they're all pear-shaped. I like that. I want to do something weird with those flaps. Zach, can we get a picture of a baboon ass so the people understand how attractive they are? But don't search baboon ass. Search baboon booty.

Do only the male baboons have the blue asses? I don't know. I'm going to have gay monkey sex. Is it important to have blue? What? I think that's a sign of infection, though, isn't it?

No, I thought that the blue ass was to show how virile his... I think of him as red. Whoa! That does look infected. I don't think you've got enough cock to handle that. Oh, no. That is... It looks like they tried to recreate uh like goats with a fucking baboon ass it's like a pig nose it looks like a fruit or something like like

it shouldn't be it looks like a close-up of a cat's nose it does yeah oh i do see that this is like a blurry close-up of a cat i might might want to change my answer. Look at the one in the background eating the banana. Yeah, I want to fuck that one. They're getting me in that banana. Yeah, seductively. I mean, I guess, I don't know. If I fuck a gorilla, I'll have the strongest kids.

Yeah, that's true. Right? That's true. Oh man, it's like an owl mixed with a gorilla. I think you're describing like the perfect. Oh, you know what? The body of a gorilla with the mind of a dumber animal. I'm not a scientist, but if I fuck a silverback gorilla, I'll have the strongest kids. Yeah.

And if the silverback gorilla gets. The joke is we're both boys. But anyway, carry on. and if the silverback gorilla gets mad at you and tries to fuck you it's gonna be the most pleasant of great ape rapes because gorillas have the smallest penises of the the big apes true did you see that thing where mike tyson was actively trying to arrange a fight with a gorilla yeah yeah yeah Is that true? He was on a lot of cocaine. He would have died.

Can I say this? He would have put up a little of a fight. No, he would have been beaten to death by his own detached arm. Animals are always taken aback by confidence. You've seen it, right? You've seen how those little animals would be confident as fuck. A little dog would run off a big dog and first for sure like the little dog comes out and it's like hard as fuck the big dog is like whoa i need to evaluate this before i go

any further let me size you up little man god damn you're aggressive like they don't know what to do gorilla would have the same thing i think i think mike tyson comes in there and he's just fucking you know he'd give him one of these one of of those King Kong chest things and the gorilla be like, but fuck. And they'd be like, Mike, don't make eye contact. And he'd be like,

bitch, come on. He'd be, he'd get a few in. And then I think the gorilla might, might maul him. I think what would happen is he would get like two of the heaviest punches in ever before the gorilla fully internalized.

Like, are we fighting? What's it doing? Is it petting at me? Oh, he's trying to fuck me up. And then the gorilla would use his gorilla arms and tear off his genitals and his feet and his hands. I'm going to make a wild statement here. Mike Tyson

with brass knuckles beats a silverback gorilla. That's outrageously stupid. Mike Tyson with brass knuckles kills a silverback gorilla. That is bar none the dumbest thing you've ever said. I think he would break his hand still. No, they wrap him. We're going to wrap him. We're going to wrap him.

We've got custom made Mike Tyson. I don't think you could. I just don't think you could. Mike Tyson is somebody I would never want to get hit by, but I don't think you could knock out a gorilla. I mean, if we're talking just strength alone, the amount of strength in the gorilla package, you could put Andre the Giant,

what was he, 7'5", 500 pounds legit? You could put him in there and the gorilla still overpowers. People who have fought gorillas and chimps and stuff all say that. I've heard that. There's a guy, he's an MMA fighter. Badass. He's not UFC level, but let's just agree that if the guy fights MMA for a guy he's an mma fighter badass he's not ufc rival but let's just agree that if the guy fights mma for money he's badass yeah and uh he fights a baby chimp a baby chimp and he barely gets out of there it's certainly you wouldn't call it a win he's like

you know like i hit it on the head i was afraid afraid I was going to hurt it. Unbeknownst to me, you can't hurt it. He held it by the arms. This is a baby chimp, right? This guy's like 200 pounds against 30. I don't even know. And he's like, I told him, and he's not

like people. He's like wood. He's like a wooden animal and it just apparently they're just solid and just drawn yeah dense and and able to take a headshot he was hitting it with like a club oh you know this video no but i'm listening like what i know my my my hours and hours of being stoned and watching david attenborough are coming here. Their skulls are tremendously thicker than ours, and it matters. We think of our skull as this thing that's like, oh, yeah, that's a helmet. All right. Basically, it keeps our brains from spilling out, right?

That's all our skulls are good for. Theirs aren't like that. Theirs are still good at defending them from everything and anything. I punched a cow in the head one time. Don't ask why. The cow was probably looking at you funny. I mean, I hit it in the top, between the eyes

hard. It hurt my hand so much. And when I say there was no give in a cow skull, I mean, it felt like hitting a wall feels less solid than hitting a cow in the head. You can put a little dent in sheetrock, it'll wobble a little bit, even wood.

This lat part on the top of their head, it's just... It's like the corner of a retaining wall. Isn't it crazy how some things are harder than hard? To me, ice is harder than concrete. Ice is harder than concrete. Ice is definitely harder. Being cold doesn't help.

That's true. Everything feels harder to fall on when you're cold. You know what the hardest thing known to fall on when you're cold. You know what the hardest thing known to man is? Your icy driveway. Because it's both. It's icy concrete. Nah, he's right.

It's icy concrete. If you've ever walked down a steep driveway trying to take the garbage out and been like, okay, it's just that bullshit ice. That's like ice that's skidding around on top. And then you hit that solid piece at the bottom that black eyes and your your heels go out and your ass just hits the oh no it's terrible dude i thought i thought i was gonna i thought i don't have a lot of that hill bone my driveway's steep and like i fell down it two winters ago and it was like it was one of those falls where it's like the worst, where it doesn't look like you fell that hard. So like anyone who saw it wouldn't expect like a bunch.

But like it was the way Jackass describes it, where Johnny Knoxville, like in an interview, was like, what you want ideally is something that doesn't hurt a lot, but looks like it hurts a lot. The worst possible thing is something that hurts a lot and doesn't look like it hurts a lot because then people are like oh did that even hurt and it's like yeah that was more painful than all the other skits me falling on the ice yeah but no we didn't even put it in i've i've done that exact thing but i've actually fell on the back of my head doing that um for whatever like talking about skulls and stuff for whatever reason i don't know why, maybe it's the shape of my head or something, but I have never even been, I've never been knocked out. I've never been like rattled and I've hit my head like that quite a bit growing up. Homer Simpson brain.

I think I do. It's just, I don't know what it is, but it's not pleasant, like hitting your head that hard and then like realizing you did it and then nothing you know what i mean it's like did i just do damage like what happened um so well that's not good some of the most painful some of the most painful like injuries to me um are when you hit your elbow or your knee uh really hard like i was playing paintball at my dad's field one time. There was a cattle thing in the woods that was buried by the ground, one of its legs was. I went

down on my knees hard, expecting really soft composted earth. My knee instead hit a solid piece of round steel. It just hit my kneecap so solid. It jarred the nerves

it was like your funny bone went off and i had i couldn't it like paralyzed my leg for like a good like minute or two it was just like laying there with my leg completely asleep and throbbing like it was wild it hurt so fucking much they they did a uh a question or some kind of q a or something like that you guys know mcfoley mankind yeahankind? Yeah. Crazy, you know, fly off fucking tops of cages and shit. He said the most painful thing in his career was this thing. It was like somebody just shut his

somebody shut a steel cage door on his head or something. He's like, that didn't look like much, but I remember specifically that being the most painful thing that's ever fucking happened to me. I don't know why, but it just hit him and he was like it didn't it doesn't look painful but it's sometimes the stuff that doesn't look painful that's the most goddamn debilitating i mean i've i've never been knocked out but that's not really i'm not knockoutable yeah no woody how many times

i don't know you start counting and i'm gonna start counting and i'm not talking about the flash knockouts. I'm talking about like you wake up, and you're not sure how long has passed. One time I got knocked out, I was playing basketball. And you should know I'm not that good at basketball. And someone threw it. It bounced off the backboard, hit me in the forehead. And then, I don't know, I was looking up wondering how long it had been.

Really? Yeah. There was another time. Basketball? It must have just hit you like square. Seems like stuff like that. Right. Must have hit it and then jarred your brain or something.

I always thought I was young. Yeah. I probably didn't have as much skull to sort of resist movement. As an adult, I got knocked out by a hockey check one time i was um i was in front of the net i was kind of extended to uh to defend and someone just laid me out so yeah was it a dirty hit like shoulder to head it was a no check league oh well what a piece of shit all hits for dirty yeah This is touch. Blame true for saying.

I don't think I have any superpower to not be knocked out. I've just been lucky. Because I remember taking the closest I think I've gotten is a coach of ours in a hockey practice. I played goalie, obviously. He teed up from the top of the circle when I was maybe 15 and he took like a full force slap shot and it hit me right in the cage and like up until that point i had always imagined like oh a helmet it protects you from everything if i were to get smoked really and i'd taken shots off the face you know obviously off my mask and everything but like it hit me so hard and so square that like it knocked my mouth guard

out somehow. And I remember like, he was like, come on, Taylor, come on. Like for the next shot for the drill and feeling like everything's not a hundred percent like cool right now.

Like I feel woozy almost, but I didn't want to like get in trouble. So I just kept playing. That's what everybody does. That's how, that's how we get some of these sports injuries. Right. Like, injuries right like like it's not just that first one that first little uh concussion that made you a little dizzy like imagine if you're in the nfl and now you go back out again for a pass but now you're woozy and you don't see that guy coming retrospect that coach was

a piece of shit for shooting it that hard on me it was one of those things like where if there was like an adult me on on the other side of the glass and that was my kid and i was like if me was my kid i would have been like the fuck the fuck is wrong with you shooting at my kid like that but like as a kid you say how old you were i think i was 14 15 so i was playing in a pretty competitive 27 year old i'm a pretty big guy i mean the proof's in the the proof's in the pudding right he hit it hard enough to concuss you hard enough than any 14 year old for sure i've been knocked out three times um i had that atv accident i hit my head on the asphalt

um and when i woke up i was having a seizure so that's a hundred percent out um i had this homemade rope swing attached to a tree and like um it was made out of like uh the cable that i think it's actually like power cable the kind that would like run across and like power homes is that that thick shit for some reason we had a bunch of we made a loop in the bottom tied the rest up in an oak tree and you'd stand on the hill and swing out over like a low-lying little area. Big swing. And while it was at its apex, I think it snapped. Or maybe on the way back. In any case, inertia was with me,

and I put the back of my head into the ground real hard. If it snapped, you were heavy at the time. Yeah. It was the wrong time for it to snap. It's not going to snap at the light drop-off point. If it snapped, you'd just land like fucking off point yeah well like if it snapped you just like land like fucking a cat and be like oh and like play it off you know those like shitty oh go ahead i'm so sorry and and then my cousin knocked me the fuck out when we're boxing for sure

yeah yours reminded me of when i i was in a moped accident once and I got knocked out for sure. When I came to, everyone was surrounding me. There was a crowd gathered as my eyes reopened and I was talking nonsense about Santa Claus and shit. It's embarrassing too. Wait, am I good, you guys? Am I okay? Yeah, you're good.

I paid for 500 and I'm so upset. I've had two panic attacks that ended with me hitting asphalt, though, or concrete. And when I came to, I was like, I had like a bloody lip or something and a bloody elbow. So, like, who knows what I had in my head on those? Because, like, I just, I don't even remember. I remember being in my yard. A stressful thing then happened.

And then I remember waking up on the asphalt in my yard. Was it an acute stressful thing or a stressful time of life? Very acute. Yeah. Yeah. Like a thing happened. It was like, oh, no. And then I just passed the fuck out.

You have panic attack things like that, right? Where you pass out, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Happens to my sister, too. Like Tony Soprano style, like full, like lose your breath. Everything goes gray.

And then you're on the ground. Yeah, my sister, that's happened to her a few times. Maybe two or three times that I can remember where she's passed out like that in a similar sense. So, yeah, that's not fun. That sucks. Yeah, it happens to me in court, which is a great time to have

a panic attack. Yes, right? That could work to your advantage. You don't want to be all, you're in the court. Your Honor, my client is clearly too much of a bitch to handle. As I crawl away. You can't put me in there. I went down in this

court one time and I want to say my cousin grabbed, I had a belt on and my cousin grabbed one belt loop and one of the sheriff's deputies grabbed the other. And that's all that kept me upright. And they sort of like puppeteered me to a back room. They weekend at Kyle.

Yeah. And then like, I was like, they're like, don't worry. The ambulance is on the way. But like the thing about a panic attack is once it's over, there's no, it's nothing but embarrassment. If you, if you can feel such a thing i can't anymore and and so like you just want to get out of there like like you're not you don't need to recover from this this isn't even like if your blood sugar got low and you went down

you just got like a like a an adrenaline surge and it knocked you out for a second now you're 100 so i'm just like ambulance you say i'll be right back and we're fleeing the scene as the ambulance shows up i I know what an ambulance costs. I'm 22 years old. This is America. They're trying to financially punish you. I'm like, that judge was trying to fuck us in there, Scott. But that ambulance driver, he's coming for our hearts and souls.

So we got to get out of here. Dude, ambulances in America are a problem. You don't want to take a ride. Not unless you need it. Now, when you need it, you're like, five grand? I would have paid anything to get to that hospital that fast. To not die. But if you just need some oxygen,

and that fucking Krukenwagen shows up, you don't want him there. I was watching that video the other day about how words are pronounced in all the pretty languages, and then German at the end. Have you seen this? No. They're like ambulance.

Ambulance. Ambulance. Krugendwagen. It's like, what? Germany and Russia, they've got that down. Like, very intimidating sound russia even more so because they're let it's everything's caps like yeah everything it's so loud kyle i've worked with russians i know you have too were they angry all the time in in non-angry situations? Sergei was the rapist.

He was a real sweet guy, family man, very fun-loving and lighthearted, always joking. He was like a 45-year-old guy and just always laughing. I was 20, and we were good friends. We were always yucking it up, having lunch together and joking. We got along well. yucking it up having lunch together and joking um we got along well dimitri seemed like he hated like being in america maybe like like like like something about his life was wrong like he i think he didn't like he was annoyed by everyone's ignorance in stupidity i could tell that like like he didn't suffer fools um and and he was an intelligent man this wasn't somebody was posing

like like i could tell he was just annoyed that people weren't quite as smart And he was an intelligent man. This wasn't somebody who was posing. I could tell he was just annoyed that people weren't quite as smart as he was and that no one was noticing that he was as smart as he was because he was always having to slowly explain. He mansplained, but the people needed mansplaining too. This lady came in one time. He was a bit of a smart ass too. And she was like, I bought this car. And every time I go above 85 miles per hour, it starts making a grinding noise. I hear whistling sounds coming to the windows. And he goes, speed limit is 70 miles per hour. And then he just smiles and nods.

And I'm sitting next to him like, good point. Good point. He had no retort. Who would do that? I sold you a car for day-to-day drive. I did not know you wanted a race car. We can provide this. What is she going to say?

No, I don't want a fucking race car. I want a car that doesn't make grinding and whistling noises. But he's going to just be like, you signed the contract, the car's still driving, and you're breaking the law law and you're coming to me like it's my problem. She's got no retort to that. He was a fun guy, though, but he hated life, it seems.

He was so miserable. When he got mad, would he ever mutter in Russian? I never heard him speak Russian, no. Sergei would speak Russian to me to teach me Russian. I didn't pick a ton up, but just little bits. Only the accent.

Only the accent. There were a couple of phrases I knew, but I refused to repeat them because I know they're off. I think I know how to ask what time it is and tell someone to go fuck their mother and call somebody a son of a bitch and stuff like that. All the necessary. Yeah, yeah.

And cheese. I know how to say cheese. I don't know why. For pictures? Or for food, like. And cheese. I know how to say cheese. I don't know why. For pictures? Or for food, like on a sandwich. I think it's like sear, but it's like they roll the R in this weird way that I could never do. It's like sear.

It's like some fucking weird shit. I could be wrong about that. He was Ukrainian. I mean, it's the same. He probably gets it. It's all kind of the same. Eastern Europeans would strongly disagree with that. Yeah, isn't it weird how a person from Florida, a Floridian,

and a Bostonian are so far apart. These people, if they were in Europe, they would have nothing in common. They would speak a different language. They would have a completely different culture. Whenever someone comes over that has visited with me anyway from like europe or whatever that's the thing that's uh i think they notice right away it's like like wow like this place is fucking huge what do you mean you can drive for six seven hours and you're just

have days more drive you know like like because i think those european countries are for the most part pretty small right i mean they're all walking distance, it seems. I have a friend who came over from over there and he was surprised. His biggest takeaway was like, man, America is built for cars. You can't even walk to the grocery store. That's something I never even thought about.

We're too big of a country geographically compared to them. I think we suffer from that, though, right? I feel like we're not very well cultured because everything is America. graphically compared to them i think we suffer from from that though right i i feel like we're um we're not very well cultured because we everything is america it's america for for days where whereas if you're in europe you could take like a little day trip and you could go visit a whole different culture and like like see like their architecture architecture their art their language their their

way of life for us like you go a state over, and it's just Alabama. They're just like us, but stupid. They're so much more divided. They're just like us, but their football team sucks. Yeah, but their football team is terrible. They didn't even win the championship this year, these fucking losers. Yeah, it's been a bad year for them. If you do those map overlays and you take the U.S. on top of Europe,

it makes it seem a little more reasonable because it's like okay like i mean sure the culture between ukraine and southern italy or sicily that's like the same distance as like boston and northern florida or atlanta or whatever like yeah those cultures aren't quite like boston and atlanta they're totally different cultures but it's not quite as disparate as another thing and that's right in italy like that same geographic like it's just like i think i don't remember who said this but like it always stuck with me is like in the united states a hundred years is a long time and in the in europe a hundred miles is a long distance yeah yeah that's that's really well said. Because here,

I can drive the distance of three, four, five European countries to get to Denver from St. Louis. They're still speaking English. They don't even have a discernible accent from me. Here's the other thing. During that drive,

you will learn nothing new because the interstate system in the United States, maybe this isn't the same for everyone, but for you Europeans and Asians, everyone who's not from the US, let me tell you something you might not know. The United States is cookie cutter.

If you're on the interstate highways, the ones that allow you to really pass around at 70 miles per hour at high speed from state to state, major city to major city, everything is the same on the side of those roads. It's billboards and the same 15 restaurants, copy pasted, the same on the side of those roads. It's billboards and like the same 15 restaurants, copy pasted the same Tanger outlet, copy fucking pasted.

It's corp, it's corporations fucking stamp every 3.5 miles on the next exit for ever. And the way you know where you're leaving like areas is like, Oh, we stopped seeing quick trips and we started seeing this other nice you know roads gas station oh we're in the south now pilot pilot or whatever something to eat you have like six choices there's like chick-fil-a cookout mcdonald's wendy's that's all you need on repeat and i would just every six miles the same fucking like six of those ten choices just comes up again.

There are so many subways in this country. So I refused to do that shit when we would travel the country. I would tell the guys, I was like, look, we're driving to Texas today. We're not going to eat at a McDonald's. We're not going to eat anywhere that we've ever eaten before on this fucking trip. If we're stopping for fucking Hardee's in the morning, I'm going to scream. You've got to find a goddamn diner, a local business, something like – if we're going to Texas, I want Texas barbecue.

I want a Texas barbecue that doesn't have a fucking trademark on the end of it. Not Texas Roadhouse. No. And we would do that for real. We would always – we would pull off the interstate, and we'd drive like 5 ten miles sometimes just to get to some place that wasn't a McDonald's or some shit so that we could say we did a thing. That's like the best part. In Kentucky, we went, all right, so some of this may not be accurate, but this is how it was told to me. Apparently, Colonel Sanders, the real Colonel Sanders, was married.

They divorced. And in the settlement, I believe she might have gotten to keep the original original recipe the dark i think it was her recipe um but he was allowed to keep saying he had it but there's this restaurant in kentucky that's like this big mansion where you go in and it's that family style dinner where you're just like we'll take dinner and they bring you like everything and just cover the table with food there's no ordering like this and that and the other. It was so fucking good. It was like Mrs. KFC's

family-style restaurant that was generational or something in a mansion. That shit was amazing. It was worth the 30-minute detour. That's awesome. That's one of the best parts, too, about road trips is stopping off at those little tiny places that you've never seen. Maybe it's just one restaurant that's owned by a family that has like

some great food. And that's like an experience. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's like the most fun part about traveling for me is eating things in different places. Hey,

that's it. No, that's it. It's part of it. It's part of that's when I go somewhere new, I'm like, what am I going to get to eat? If I'm not disgustingly full by the time I get to my destination, I'm upset.

The first vacation that my wife, then girlfriend at the time, that we ever went on, I told her we were going to Florida. And my dad wasn't staying at his Florida place, and so we were staying there. And I was like, I have to go to a crab leg place a couple times while I'm here and she's like I understand and I'm like I don't know if you do it's gonna take a while because I'm gonna order three or four entrees and

I'm gonna like be chaining them like a smoker like just crack crack crack they're gonna come ask if it and she I think she thought I was joking because I tend I do joke a lot and we get there and we both order our meal. I get my first order, which is two pounds of snow crab legs, an absolute a paltry peasant tear offering of of an amount of crab. And I ate the entire thing and she finishes her meal about the same time I finished mine and the lady comes back and is like are we all done and I'm like I'll do another

and she's like an another and I'm like another meal and then she was like okay I'm gonna get that going for you and oh no it's even worse I ordered ordered four of them. And so then she brought out the second one. And there's like corn and potatoes on the side. I'm not touching the sides. Really? I love those. I'm not touching the sides until I'm done with the crab. I'm not wasting stomach space on that. And so I eat through the second one.

And I'm about halfway through that. She comes back, asks how everything's going. I say, go ahead and get started on that third one for me. And I finish the second right as she's bringing the third out. And I get through that. Meanwhile, my wife has been sitting there for 35

minutes watching me eat. And then I go... She's like... She's like... And then I finish the third one. I order the fourth one i order the fourth one and the lady goes i uh i'm sensing you don't want your sides and i'm like sides can stay don't eat sides just just the crab and then when she brought out the fourth and final two pounds she also brought out

a very tall poured glass of wine for free for my wife to she was like i can tell you're on it was it was a two hour two and a half hour dinner and for two hours and five minutes of it was just her watching me eat it was it was great i got home i started to like feel ill on the way home because that's a normal part of eating eight pounds of crab and then you get home and the shit you have within an hour after eating the crab it's remarkable it's like how does it already smell like crab it's like when you eat asparagus and you piss 20 minutes later it's like how to get through me that fast but yeah that was man that's one of them oh yeah i i had some butter i i went through a couple tins of butter that was the first time really every other place i've i've been a dick and ordered a bunch of food she got a great tip though

on this what was it 200 meal i was gonna ask you had to buy more entrees every time wasn't like an all you can eat crab thing no it was like 30 30 35 bucks for two pounds of snow crab and so they should have charged you 31 without the bread they should have i should i need to make a complaint the uh i vote i always go to like joe's crab shack i don't know if that's low class or not but it's good they're like sell it by the bucket you know like literally and you get to keep the bucket i think if you eat enough i always eat enough to get the bucket i do not think i am on your level i didn't learn how to like snap them correctly until i was a man grown um dude you know when you see those like rubik's cube competitions yeah that's how that's how i am with crab legs i'm i will i am i am faster than

people even know you can be with crab legs. I give it a little one way, a little, snaps a little, and then all the way the other way and pull. It usually works out pretty well. I usually get all the meat out, but I got to get the tools out if I want those little baby ones.

It would be really cool to eat crabs with Taylor and have him open my food like I'm a child. Yeah. It'd be really cool if you crabs with Taylor and have him open my food like I'm a child. Yeah. It'd be really cool if you fed me, Taylor. I have straight up done that for people before. They'll get crab with me and they're over there like retards, just mushing it.

They're trying to snap the big leg piece, the juicy piece everyone likes. They're trying to go like that, just one direction. No, it's a snap down, then quickly snap back up. then you move it upward a little bit and then it pulls out one big solid piece and they're over there picking at it like idiots if you go to a really high-end restaurant and order lobster they do it for you you know they offer yeah would you like me to do this and and oh they're on your level i think i

mean i i know that's rare air but but yeah the way that they can open a lobster and crack it and shit, they do it for a living. They're very good. Oh, speaking of rare air, can we shift for a second? I wanted to talk about this. Woody, we talked about that gentleman. You'll know his name probably, and if not, I'll feel like an asshole for putting you on the spot, but the guy who crashed his plane.

Oh, let me look it up. Something Everett or something? So let me give... I like everett or something so dreams every so let me give i like doing this occasionally i like giving my very ignorant take on something and you who is much more informed fill in the blanks for me so it seems that this guy is some kind of like uh it seems like this guy is trevor jacob trevor jacob makes uh youtube videos about being a pilot and doing extreme things it would seem and recently he made a video where he's in a real shitbox of an airplane that I can't imagine he normally flies.

I mean, I don't know a lot about airplanes, but I was looking at buying an $80,000 airplane once, and it was 10 times nicer than this fucking plane. So I would say this plane looks like it cost about $8,000 fucking dollars. Can I jump in a little? Yeah. So he did buy an inexpensive airplane as kyle described some people would think that this like 1934 airplane was kind of an heirloom to be cared for not to be trashed carry on yeah so in the video

he's got cameras everywhere and the first thing i noticed was he's wearing a fucking parachute then he's like oh no the engine's out but he starts doing this thing like where he's pulling the yoke or whatever back and forth and like stalling the plane out on purpose clearly and then you go to another camera angle there's a gopro on the fucking wing and and then there's another one on the tail the tail one is pointing forward the one of the wings pointed toward the cockpit and so you've got these really great angles there's another one on the tail the tail one is pointing forward the one on the wings pointed toward the cockpit and so you've got these really great angles there's another camera in the in the cockpit with him and he's wearing one and he's got his like stick cam you know he's prepared already i'm a little skeptical about the amount of camera equipment this man brings on his daily

flights can i add to the parachute thing yeah so it is it's uncommon for a pilot to carry a parachute but not unheard of it is unheard of to carry a skydiving parachute with a reserve backup for your regular plane flight let me ask you this is it common for them to be wearing the motherfucker yeah like you have like a narrow backpack that you might wear especially if you're like a combat pilot in the old days like they would have a set for sure then yeah yeah well that setup can still exist today but it's not very common what he had if i understand it right was a legit skydiving uniform on with like thick reusables it looks and by the way you guys can watch this video if you want like like just search the man's name and you'll find like not only his video but

like tons of reaction videos the reaction videos are lame because they're they're under the they pretend like like we've been doing for the last minute that we don't know that the man just like jumped out of his plane for shits and giggles to like show you what a plane looks like when it crashed and but but the problem is i think is that he filed like an faa report maybe saying whoopsie daisy had a bit of a crash and it's clear he didn't it's clear that he crashed his plane on purpose but he has great camera angles from all those gopros because they all got recovered and when he's like parachuting in or whatever he's filming the plane as it makes these like loops and like faster and faster toward a mountain you get to see the plane hit a mountain and uh so and like faster and faster toward a mountain you get to

see the plane hit a mountain and uh so i think what he did is like crazy irresponsible i guess and wasteful too but that's right up my fucking alley right crazy irresponsible and wasteful so i got no issue with that and it seems like look i don't know a lot about planes again seemed like he'd rigged the plane to make right turns though because it just sort of like went round and round and then crashed my only thought would be like could the you know how like sometimes a rider will come off a motorcycle and that that bike has a funny way of just going and going straight up because they're meant to do that and it's perfectly balanced like i'd be worried that maybe he jumps out the plane rights itself and glides like eight miles to like a city maybe he maybe the reason it spiraled down

is because he accounted for that like he went to a spot where it'd be safe to crash a plane you know like he didn't really do it over a city or over a neighborhood or something like that agree he went it safe to crash a plane it looked desolate i was worried i was worried about how he was going to get out of where he was landing it was so goddamn desolate yeah like if there is a responsible way to abandon your airplane, perhaps this is it. And he clearly jumped out of the airplane. Yeah.

On purpose. Yeah. So there's something called a NASA report where if you violate an FAA rule and then you say, Hey, I violated it. I didn't want to, this was the,

this is why I made this mistake. I did this once I, I was flying and my motor went out. And I had two choices. I could either fly over houses and get back to my yard, which I've landed in a thousand times and I'm very good at it. Or I could land in the marsh and take my chances. So I decided that my move was to fly over houses, which you can't do, and land in my yard. Then I filed a NASA report.

I was like, hey, this is why I broke this rule. You know, it seemed like a safety issue for me. And, uh, and you're all set. This guy filed a NASA report like, Hey man, darn this thing happened while I was wearing a skydiving outfit with six GoPros all over the plane, plane broke. So I had had to jump he didn't have to jump he could have landed this thing safely it just turned into a glider you know he would have been fine but uh instead he abandoned the plane and said you know oopsie daisy uh here's my get out of jail free card made a mistake yeah he did the opposite of what we said we wanted pilots to do last week and that was stay with their plane to the last minute before they eject.

He ejected, and the plane was fine. He said, like, 12,000 feet. I give up. Yeah. I'm out. But I think it's a pretty cool video. I enjoyed watching it. I hope he doesn't get any trouble,

because what he did was all the things that I said, but it was also a cool fucking video, and I guess I don't care about FAA rules. i couldn't care less i'm with you guys like like there are good faa rules designed to keep people safe most of the rules around paramotoring are designed to keep other people safe they're like you can be as stupid as you want but don't fly over people houses crowds shit like that don't fly in places where there are other planes, like big airports. And it's like these all seem like fair rules. You know, I'm cool with it.

This guy may have broken some rules, but in a way that he didn't put anyone else in danger. So I don't care. Yeah, I agree. The video is pretty cool. Yeah, I'm watching it. It's pretty neat. It's pretty fucking cool. Like I'd never seen, I don't know, like modern cameras are so good gopros are so good yeah this is amazing quality

too yeah there was a part where uh when he's skydiving when the background looks so scenic and stuff i was like you know if this was cgi i couldn't tell it like it looks like a movie almost yeah it looks like it's beautiful it's so beautiful it doesn't look real it's got it's good uh it's got a cool effect but yeah i mean i i think what i what i think is super lame is how all the other like plane guys on youtube or whatever are like giving this guy shit because i think they're just jealous i think there's jealous that this guy like is getting so much attention and so they're doing the dumbest fucking thing they could and giving them a lot more attention like they've never

played this game before because they make stupid fucking airplane videos but uh but trust me like the best thing you do is shut the fuck up and file a report with the faa dummy it is impossible to make entertaining aircraft videos like it it's basically driving with lots of rules and and you just go up and drive in a super noisy environment and they're almost all bad why does pka not have a tiktok just throw it out there just a question what is this i don't even have a personal tikt. I don't do personal social media. I don't have any of it. You are a Twitch streamer. Yeah, I have a Twitch account. Actually, you're a former Twitch streamer. Let's be real.

I'll be jumping back. Me too. Yeah, I'm about to restart probably. Complete Tarkov with me. No. You're a dealer. You watched me the other night. Didn't it look fun? Yeah. Yeah. Dude.

We won a fucking heater last night. Like 13 win streak, killing PMCs every raid. Me and Dirty are like fucking in the night with flashlights and machine guns. You and Dirty were fucking in the night? All night. All night. We played Tarkov, we fucked. Back and forth. I'm lucky to have him.

He's a cute little twink. You're goddamn right he is. I bet Dirty's ass is hairless. So anybody who plays Tarkov, I'm keeping this short for you who don't. I'm sorry. But if you play Tarkov, I got a fucking Merlin key. That car on Lighthouse fucking falling out. Made like 7 million rubles last night

just having so much fun. I come up with an idea, Woody. Here's the thing. People are starting to get the level 6 armor. The slicks and stuff. You can't fuck with that. We don't have the ammo for it. So I switched to all leg meta. Everyone gets shot in the legs now. I use only the ammo that does flash damage, like no armor penetration. I can't shoot

through shit. But nobody has armor on the legs, so everybody dies to five bullets to the legs, no matter what they wear. Have you tried the double barrel shotgun? That's smart i'm using the mcx with uh the 300 blackout with uh like whisper rounds so it does like 100 damage per shot to legs it takes two bullets to a leg three bullets to a leg to kill somebody there is a double barrel shotgun and you can shoot both barrels at once and when you hit legs it insta

kills the player but if it doesn't you have to reload so that's the balance yeah um i like my machine gun more i'm not saying you're wrong i'm just saying you might like it especially if you wanted to run a cheaper kit oh that we don't do because with that merlin key i i make so much goddamn money every raid like every every dirty's getting jelly of my key it's it's one of the rare keys in the game. And it's just so good. It's just so fun. You open the trunk of a car in the woods

in like perfect safety where nobody could fuck with it. You spawn... I spawn right next to it all the time. You open the trunk and it's all items. It's like 300,000 worth of like bitcoins and stuff. It's like the Red Room in labs or something. Yeah, it's really fucking good.

It's 300,000 rubles that you put in your ass, in your gamma container, so you can sell it to a vendor and nobody, if you die, it doesn't matter. It's wonderful. But that's enough Tarkov talk. It's been tremendously fun, though. I'm glad I started playing again.

I do want to say this real quick. I don't know if you know, Woody, I'm not sure what notes you had on me, but the last few years, I actually signed with TikTok back in 2019, and I have close to 2 million over there on TikTok now. Exciting, huh, Taylor? Wow.

That's awesome, man. Congratulations. Is that a lot? I don't know anything about TikTok. I'm not kidding about the whole TikTok thing. They've been the best platform that Kyle left. Kyle left. I literally don't know if TikTok ends with a C or a K.

It's definitely a K. And I'm telling you guys right now, I think that a big thing, obviously, the RSK fan base is huge. The Real Sweet Kids is huge. I think TikTok brings it to that next generation. I think that you guys can definitely throw up 100 highlights per episode and grow your platform like crazy.

I've helped a ton of people do it. I manage multiple accounts with over 10 million. Now I work with a ton of the FaZe boys. Actually, FaZe Clips lived with me for a couple of years when we first signed with TikTok. He's the original founder of FaZe, and he wants to come on the podcast at some point if you ever want to have him.

He's got a crazy story. I don't know how TikTok works, really. I don't have one, but if it's just uploading a bunch of little clips, because there are clip channels for our show on YouTube that do crazy numbers. Bro, bro you have a podcast and there is a series there's like an ecosystem of highlight videos that take a piece of our podcast and upload it reverse uno card we take their highlights and upload them on tiktok it's no work at all. It really is a big thing, honestly.

Zadok! How long of videos can you do on TikTok? They just released the ability to go up to three minutes. And then they also have live streaming capabilities. And they're going to be, I believe that they're going to be a huge Twitch competitor this year.

They're working on a ton of stuff behind the scenes with that. I think it's going to be amazing. believe that they're going to be a huge Twitch competitor this year. They're working on a ton of stuff behind the scenes with that. I think it's going to be amazing. The platform itself has treated me very nicely. I signed with them in May of 2019. And I really 100% believe in the platform. The stuff that I've seen done through there and the way that they work with creators is great.

I think PKA should throw up 100 highlights a week from a PKA episode and you grow. I think that you would grow like crazy especially for that next generation of fans that are maybe a little bit younger right now we had a clip i think it was on the front page of tiktok a little while back where kyle and i were making fun of lizzo for being so fat i saw no i did see it on snapchat it might have been on tiktok too oh snapchat that's what it See, that's how fucking far away from it I am. I don't even remember which site it was on.

He's already doesn't know what the Q is. I'm the 30-year-old boomer. I was going to say, I've been told to make a TikTok and just upload clips of me yelling at Call of Duty for 20 seconds. They're like, people will love it. I'm like, okay. Chinese-owned TikTok, Is that a thing? Yeah, but that's a huge user base

right there. I don't want anything made in China. I'll tell you that right now. Not unless it's money. Not unless it's a million followers on TikTok. I'm good with the Chinese coin. I went super heavy with TikTok.

Everything I'm touching was probably made in China. I think this chair, this desk, the fucking phone, my mouse, the keyboard, it was probably all. Probably, man. It was made in my garage. And so why not trust TikTok? I work super heavy with them. So if anybody had any questions or anything, I'm more than happy to help if you ever need a... I just believe that it would be effective you know yeah what are the what are the let's i'm gonna cut cut the chase

uh what are the what are the monetization deals with tiktok so i'm gonna share with you guys because it's just us boys in here you know yeah yeah of course but i'm to tell you guys right now, I made more money off of TikTok in the last year than I made off of YouTube when I was grinding it hard for like five years or whatever. So the monetization options right now, they have a creator fund where you get paid like per video, just like YouTube, like ad revenue. It's very, very low though. I think my best month was maybe like $1,200 and and I was getting like 30 million-plus views a month. Jesus Christ.

So, yeah, it's not great, but what they also have is a brand marketplace where companies can reach out to you for brand deals and sponsor your videos. Oh, that'll be big for us, yeah. When we go off on one of the Nazi bits. I'm not saying you'd be surprised what blows up on TikTok ifok and we started out there

taylor who was it that made the uh the nazi uniforms uh hugo boss maybe we'll get hugo boss for as a sponsor right they'd be like these guys they're right here language i mean like unquestionable the nazis won best dressed of World War II. Very stylish. If anything, when you go back and watch Band of Brothers now, I'm almost a little frustrated where I'm like, goddammit, how come the side I'm on is wearing these

basic bitch-looking outfits and then some no-name German soldier who's not even an officer has got flair. Every American World War II soldier looks like he's wearing his Big every every american world war ii soldier like looks like he's wearing his big brother's army uniform they're all baggy yeah they don't fit well like like the germans they got like fitted suits the helmets always got that snap dangling like like no remember those world war one helmets they had with a fucking spike oh if only you know i'd kill

for one of those spikes you put a spike helmet like that on taylor and we got a weapon just put me in the cannon fire me off he's just he's just one of those flails on the chains but he's just like a person i don't like the fact that they change nazi zombies in call of duty to. And it's like the exact same Nazi zombie uniform, but they take off all the symbols and they're like, they're just zombies now. I don't know, Taylor, if you keep up with zombies. I don't keep up with zombies anymore, but you're right. Like that was part of the fun in the world at war. One is like that.

I just kill the Nazi zombie general or something like he had like a fucking metal. I mean, they didn't have swastikas or anything, but I knew what it was. They had the iron, the iron eagle, the iron cross. Iron cross. Yeah. But now it's like, no, we know they're not Nazis. And it's no, why can't they be Nazis anymore? I wanted to say this.

They have butchered the just so well, like there's Vanguard, right? World War Two game. But it's not it's not there's no like factions so when you play multiplayer it's it's my team versus the enemy team there's they don't have even like americans versus italians or the germans okay well that that's not very fun like you want to you want to see the team you're on like i don't care i don't i don't give a shit about the soviets but in cod 4 when i was on the soviet team i was fucking team soviet exactly you know i want the immersion i want the immersion of being in a scary bunker in germany a nazi zombie pops out and i gotta get to round 46 i like that immersion it feels real to me i like it

and i don't get why they get rid of the not nobody i can't imagine anyone was playing nazi zombies being like damn i love the nazis everyone's just thinking like what round they can get to and like it adds a little bit of flavor it wouldn't matter what it was if it was soviet zombies i want the little hammer i want the flare they don't want to they don't want to um i think the whole no factions thing is just again it's just to just not offend anyone but then by not doing anything you're offending people because they want to to you know experience that they want a world war ii game to have historical factions i'm offended that people aren't offended by my world war ii. Shinonuma was Japanese zombies.

What the heck's going on there? That's true. They had them wearing rice farmer hats coming at you. Very over-the-top Japanese. Little kitty backpacks. Does that one do a DDR? It's round seven. It's dogs and the ddr zombie you have to kill him before he aces fucking uh through the fire and flames or whatever did you guys ever play ddr no my my buddy still plays it he got a fucking he got a he got a rig in his uh basement so he's

just like and he's got a wife and you know not kids but like a bunch of dogs and skinny and fit he's he's actually not i wouldn't call him skinny he's got um we'll just say dad bod you know um but he is in good shape i mean he likes to eat but he he gets his workouts in with ddr yeah um yeah very good at it be a legit fitness plan oh yeah absolutely she lost a lot of weight he's lost a lot of weight he was about 30 pounds heavier so i had a friend in in high school who i've said it before but he he built his own ddr pad with like sensors and wood and panels that he got from home deep he's he's the smartest person i've ever met in my life,

a legitimate genius. And we were like 15. He built one, and he was significantly fat, like probably 60, 70 pounds overweight. He got autistically obsessed with DDR, and I swear. Autistically obsessed. He lost 80 pounds. I would go over there, and I'd be like,

what's up, man? And he'd be like, oh, you got to see how good I am on this next level and i'm like plug it in do it up show me and he like he got so fast at it that he had to add onto his pad a handlebar on the back so that you can grab onto it while you're jitterbugging or whatever the fuck you're doing he needs to weigh less yeah he was yeah he was so fast it was like you know when you watch somebody play guitar hero and the the the signals are going up at a rate that like your brain can't even comprehend how they're doing it like that's what it was with his feet and i knew him as a fat kid and so it blew my mind this is so funny man and i'm embarrassed i was about to say i knew somebody who lost. I was like, I know somebody who has a friend who lost a lot of weight doing DDR.

It is your story. So I was like, I just watched the podcast. And he stopped doing DDR, gained all the weight back. Is it more impressive if someone can do Guitar Hero and they're perfect at it because of memorization? Or if you could give them a brand new song they've never seen before and they could knock it out? That's more impressive for sure. That would just be finger dexterity. Because I feel like 90% of people who are good at Guitar Hero, that's what they've done.

They've just memorized it. Which is hard. Don't get me wrong. But I don't know. I've memorized keystrokes before and certain things before. And it's like once you have that memorized it just happens right all the guy do through fire and flames on expert blindfolded yeah that's a memorization thing that's that i saw a guy beat mike tyson's punch out blindfolded okay well that's absurd wow that is absurd but he did it on games done quick i think when they stream i want to say it was that but yeah have

you ever watched any of the like uh the speed runs and stuff and the people doing, especially the Mario stuff where you can do the custom arenas? Have you ever dipped your toe into that nonsense? It looks like a nightmare. It's funny. It keeps coming back to this. The guy with the split dick and stuff like that, he held a record for Mario. Most dicks to me.

Most dicks. Most dicks inside Mario. He split it eight ways and held a record for um most dicks to most dicks inside mario split it eight ways and held a record he holds a wreck he held a record for uh a mario world mario world speed run he was like number seven in the world support or something like that i don't fuck with it because it's a lot of i don't really have the patience to to do the memorization and like the practice. Yeah. I get really frustrated. I get really frustrated. And if anyone's never seen these things, like they, it's not like Mario that you're imagining.

They create a hellscape of a Mario world that requires incredible memorization and timing to like get through. Like you would never just look at it and be able to do it. And then they've got chat watching them. Yeah, it's stressful. Hundreds of people are watching you fail over and over, and sometimes they'll get so close and they'll make a dumb mistake. Like one that...

It's like, oh, you just had to jump. Why didn't you jump? Meanwhile, he just ducked, dodged, and matrixed his way through like fireballs and those and bullets and those and those like those flames spinning things yep those are the words you have to jump and there's only one square you can survive on yeah and it's many things coming but the worst part is the whole map is spinny things they're all going different ways and then there's like a seesaw that someone's coded in that

you've never even seen in mario and you don't know what it's going to do like sometimes there'll be like new assets right like a whole new mechanic that that is not a mario mechanic it's just part of however you code these these arenas and there's no way to know what's going to happen unless you've done your research like you don't know what that all right there's a spring and fire comes out of the bottom of it when i jump on it i guess that thing's going to catch on you've done your research. You don't know what that... Alright, there's a spring and fire comes out of the bottom of it when I jump on it. I guess that thing's going to catch on fire and then I've got to grab the strings. Oh, no. A platform like that just seems frustrating and upsetting.

I wouldn't want to do it. You guys are talking about hard levels? I don't even know that hard levels are worse than normal levels. Because what happens in a normal level in a speedrun is you need to play it perfectly every jump needs to be pixel perfect they the way that they phase through walls and such is all about hitting it exactly the right time at the right speed at the right angle

and you play like you get really really good at say the beginning of this but you only make it to the end of this run every once in a while you don't you give up if you know you're not making it having a good run so you have 10 times more experience at the start of the run than you do the end and these guys foul up at the end all the time and it's the speed runs are super impressive there's a youtube channel that breaks down the speed runs and they do a super good job with the history of Berserker. It's a YouTube channel that breaks down speed runs. They should call it autism through the years.

See, the mistake he did here was not going fast enough. No, no. They'll be like, Taylor, people were just eking away, knocking off hundreds of seconds by getting slightly more perfect and then taylor figured out that if you jump in the middle of the air and throw the turtle

shell at the thing you can jump off the turtle shell afterwards and save yourself a quarter second that people have been screaming and fighting over hundreds of a second all this time suddenly taylor had 25 in his pocket you know he's setting records every day that's so interesting to me those Those old ones, especially like Nintendo 64 speedruns, like Super Mario or those older games, those speedruns, there's so many little glitchy things like you just said. You know the turtle shell?

Bounce off that and then you catch onto the ledge over here and you save that little bit of a second. I watch those for hours. It's things that you would never find just playing the game normally. You would have to go in there and just be throwing shit at the wall. Like literally just like random. Sometimes somebody,

sometimes somebody comes across that and then somebody else sees, Oh, this randomly happened. And then they put together, you can make that jump. It's like so insane. And those are very interesting on racing games. What's a lap.

Huh? What is a lap? Exactly. You'd think a lap would be going all the way around the track but what if you take a shortcut on the track how short of a cut can you take and still have this game mechanic count it as a lap and people like figure this stuff out and do weird ways to like go past the magic spot and then get teleported back and then start over and they get they get a lap counter done without doing a whole lap.

Have you seen them speedrun Doom, the new Doom Eternal game? I have seen Doom speedruns, yeah. Oh my god. They bind jump or something to the scroll wheel, and then they wedge the character between a wall and a post, and then they flick the scroll wheel, and the character goes, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da!

Woo! I haven't seen that for the first i watched on this series where creators watch the speed runs of their own games and the end of the day and one of the devs is like what the fuck did he just do like he's a little upset the other guy's like he's bound jump to his scroll wheel and when he wedges himself there the game is registering that he just jumped 8,000 times and has to make sense of that somehow.

They're not happy that this guy's ruining the game. They're like, we could do this here. Oh yeah, we could add a thing here that would really mess him up. They're trying to ruin this guy's fucking life. Yeah, they're debugging the game because the guy basically discovered a bug there was there was some game i read where uh some guy had like rigged up a wii remote and the sensor to the

game like some game on steam or something and it was like somewhat playable but through no intention of the devs and then one of the devs saw it and was like you know what that's kind of cool or it was like the connect that was a microsoft connect something nobody's even gonna fucking have anymore you know and he's like you know what that's kind of cool you can play this with the fucking connect and then this dev just got as kyle said like autistically obsessed with the idea of he wanted to make this game playable and beatable with the fucking Kinect. He did.

For seven people who have the Kinect. I think I have one in a box. I think I have a couple of them. Every so often you see a guy play Call of Duty with a guitar hero controller. How do you even navigate with that? I just keep standing still dying

this isn't fun i think i've seen them play it though i don't know how no they definitely have like a lot of different things like the guitario thing i've seen like foot pedals all sorts of things you know what makes me upset though is the fact that nowadays with the games everything gets patched right away i miss the days of world at war or cod 4 when you'd be playing search and destroy on crossfire and then you'd be playing search and destroy on crossfire and then you look up and i'm standing on top of the tallest building with a rocket launcher you could get out with your shitty aim rpg and even even while you're cheating you're like i hope it kind of goes where i think a lot of those weren't like cheats or oversights. They were just strategic fucking

places to get. Oh, you had to jump on your friend's back and get out of the goddamn map on that one. Those are the ones that are... And then you could sprint out there with an M40, and you could walk through a building that was just like a hologram of a building.

You walk through it, but then when you turned around, it was like a two-way mirror. You could see them just fine, but you have a magical wall in front of you. Is that a real wall so you can shoot right through it? Of course. That was probably the most fun that I've ever had. I've had a ton of fun with COD and gaming,

but playing Search with friends and being in those secret spots is just so much fun. They need to stop patching things. Leave them there. They patch things, but then they break things that aren't fun to be broken. So they patch some kind

of experience glitch or something. Something that makes the game more fun. They'll patch that, but leave in invisible people or some shit. It doesn't make sense. Some games don't want you to have fun. Tarkov's like that. They clearly don't want you to like find any kind of fun way to do things.

Like they don't like that. I've never played Tarkov. I want to mainly because you guys talk about it so much and I have zero experience with it. It's a, yeah, I've got a bunch of people that are starting for the first time. Cause I've been playing it a ton in the discord and people watch me streaming in there and uh they're like oh should i pick this game up and i

always no no you shouldn't no you shouldn't you noticed you went to sleep and then woke up and i was still playing there's your answer dummy like i have not i have time for the gym to eat i don't i don't i eat here playing tarkov like like like it's been a wild week i've been i meant to ask you uh kyle uh what did you do diet wise specifically for your like uh you know the uh before we before we jump to the diet discussion we're gonna hear from a couple of sponsors uh this episode of pka brought to you by feels cbd cbd isn't about what you feel it's about what you don't feel stress anxiety pain and feels is a better way to feel better feels is a premium cbd that will help keep your head clear and feel your best it's hassle-free directly delivered to your

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PKA is the code. You can use that on all the other wonderful products over at Derek's shop. Gorilla Mind. I always want to say Gorilla Mode, but gorilla mind right gorilla mind so gorilla mind.com code pka for any other pre-workouts any other other stuff you want to get over there but principally buy our cum pills yes yeah you're curious about what they do you You're curious, you fucking dick. Buy the company. I did get Derek's protein powder, and I like it. It's good. It's good protein powder.

There's no reason for me not to buy it there because I've got a discount code now. Everyone raves about his pre-workout, the stim and the non-stim, particularly the non-stim people. I need to. Code PKA if you're doing that. No stim. Makes me anxious. With protein powder, all I care about is the macros,

how many calories for how much protein. That should be obvious. I don't want to miss bulking things. Other than that, I just really need it to taste good because that's the tastiest thing I eat every day is a protein shake. Oh, that's depressing. Here are my things. I want

it to taste good, I want it to have lots of protein, and I want it to stir well. Yes, you want it to mix well. No chunkiness. I use a milk frother. Oh, I bet that's good too. But see, I'm going right in the food processor. I put three cubes of ice,

a scoop of leucine, a scoop of creatine, three scoops of dextrose, eight ounces of orange juice, two scoops of protein powder, a scoop of collagen, and some EAAs. Have you ever put it with just water? Fuck no. A lot. I've only had it with water when I've had it. I do it a lot. Yeah.

I don't like it. So my whole thing with diet is like you do the food substitutes that you can live with. At first, I mixed protein powder with milk, whole milk. It's delicious. It's fantastic. It's so good. But it's pretty fattening. And then I started working my way through the milks, and I got the cashew milk, and I like that.

It's really good. And then I tried water. A step too far for me. Like, look, I'm trying to get fit not hate life yeah so i so i went back to cashew milk and stopped there it's 25 calories a fucking cup there's like whenever people get that weird about the diet i'm like first of all you wouldn't be talking to me about your diet if you could measure spinach and care how many calories there were in there so let's just forget about counting spinach ever as a fucking calorie.

Also, like you burn more digesting that shit. Probably. Yeah, it's nothing. Spinach is there for fucking vitamins and minerals, not for calories. Like eat as much as you want. Nobody's going to overeat on spinach. It doesn't matter. But as far as the diet that I did, we did the vertical diet because I was eating.

So I was in such a calorie surplus that it was hard to digest all that. So one of the things the vertical diet is supposed to do is have a lot of easily digestible carbs, I guess, and support like gut health and stuff so you digest those meals more quickly and get them out of your system and you can get on to the next meal. I think it's also good for like insulin resistance and

a number of other things. When Derek tells me something is good, I sort of zone out after the third paragraph about how good it is and i'm like dude you had me at do this you know like i don't need the whole like science spiel every now and then don't get me wrong it's interesting but it's not required to convince me is what i'm getting at and so a lot of times like i just do something because derrick says to do it and like there are pills i've been taking for over a year and I don't know what they do. I don't know what fucking ubiquinol does for me. Exactly.

I have no idea. I take it every day. It's expensive. Protein with water is actually, you know what? One of the best delicacies that you could possibly have is after a hard training of jujitsu, you can't make it home. You go out to your car. You brought your protein with you and your shaker. that you could possibly have is after a hard training of jujitsu you can't make it home you go out to your car you brought your protein with you and your shaker and all you got left is a hot water bottle that's half drink this is one of the delicacies delicacies so good hired is my chef

no my protein shakes are fucking delicious and they sound yeah from what you said in the in the food processor it sounds pretty fucking good. He's got orange juice in there. He's putting sugar in it. I got special cups just to put it in because it's so big. It's like a giant. I literally drink it over the sink. I get an ice cream headache while eating that protein shake. I'm so fucking famished

after the gym. You need something like that too, especially with what you're doing as far as keeping your diet intact. You need a big, filling, tasty protein shake. I just got root beer float protein and I have these creamy root beer Zevias. I'll put milk, half of this,

blend it up and I'll have a big 16 ounce protein shake. Who makes that shit? Who makes that shit? The root beer float protein. I think it's Nutribio. I'm getting some right now it's good they didn't have it when i got it the first time it was out of stock but i they just restocked and i got one like last week your internet's fucked up again yeah what could that be and just so you know we're gonna judge your entire appearance this is damning he has this is embarrassing so what so what's happening like degrading wi-fi uh

i think i think he's got no it's japanese hackers stealing his bandwidth it's ddr tiktokers they're stealing his bandwidth he's lagging again a little bit yeah not even a little bit uh since you said are you lagging again? A little bit, yeah. Since you said, are you lagging again? You haven't moved. Oh, okay. I reset and everything. I pay for fiber over here. I was about to say, you said you had fiber. You should have no fucking issues.

It looks like you're on your phone or something. No tabs open. I would suggest another restart. They fixed it last time. I hate to say it, but I'm sorry, but it's true. I will. I'll be back in five minutes. Good luck, buddy. I'll see you restart. They fixed it last time. I hate to say it, but I'm sorry, but it's true. I will. I'll be back. I'll be back in five minutes, guys.

Good luck, buddy. I'll see you soon. All right. See you soon, guys. You didn't hang up yet, dummy. I like that guy. And he was right. I had no memory of him.

I do. I can't help it, though. It's not that personal. I don't remember anybody. Did we lose PJ again? He's restarting. He's restarting his router. How long had it been since we'd had him on? Years. I'm going to guess like four years.

Something like that. Maybe I wasn't on that show. That's possible. That's going to be my excuse. Do you know who Janet Woodcock is? Porn star? No, it was five years ago when you were on the show. Oh, that's possible. That's going to be my excuse. Do you know who Janet Woodcock is? Porn star? No, it was five years ago when you were on the show. So Janet Woodcock is the head of the FDA.

And she has come out and said that everybody is going to be infected with this new coronavirus variant. Pretty much every single American is going to get covid now okay the vaccine makes it a little more chill you know it's not so bad but um it i had it last week i've been getting a you had covid last week yeah during the show yeah i i've been getting a booster

every week no it didn't come up but you're getting a booster every week but uh yeah give them to you it was like uh it was like i could definitely tell it was like different than the flu like the come on of it because like it was it was tuesday last week tuesday i think yeah yeah and i was on a call from 10 to 11 30 11 4545. And like at 10 a.m., I was sitting there feeling one million percent normal and was like thinking about I'm on the call, but I'm thinking about my workout. I'm like, I'm going to get a good workout and I'm going to feel good. And then by the end of that meeting, like I had this headache behind my eyes. And like when I I don't know if you had a headache like this, like when you look in different directions, it's like a soreness behind the eye. like this like when you look in different directions it's like a soreness behind the eye and i was like doing that thing where it's like i'm not getting sick i'm gonna work out i'm not getting sick i'm gonna work out i'm gonna work out you know just like dennis and you're okay

just deny and just like dennis from it's always sunny i'll be like sickness speak garden and then by like 1 p.m i was like like, OK, like it started accelerating so much. Like I just had a big headache, no congestion, no like fever or anything. But like it quickly was like, OK, I'm not going to be able to to work out today. And it it came on super suddenly. And then during PKN last week, I was feeling like groggy and out of it and kind of just like as soon as we finished pkn last week i went straight to bed and slept for a couple hours and did that stupid thing you do where it's like i'll just nap right now that won't fuck with my sleep for days

and yeah and then then i was like worried i was like damn if i'm like feeling like pkn's fine it's only an hour easy peasy but i was like man i'm not gonna be able to do pka very well if i'm still feeling crappy on thursday like that's how like the headache was and then wednesday it was like 50 60 percent of it was gone like out of nowhere overnight and it was like both so basically it was the fastest like come up for a sickness i've ever felt and also the fastest come down from a sickness like it was bizarre and how quickly it came on and then how quickly it disappeared i know a lot of people who have gotten covid this week so i as much as i hate what he's theory i know what i hate is that it might be true no tons of people are getting it

right now of covid that is going to spread through America and inoculate everyone, kind of like a vaccine would. I hope that's the case. That's good. Because just this week alone, our medical friend overseas in Japan, he got it.

And also Fish got it, like back to back. How's our medical friend over in Japan doing? I'll tell you privately. It's a pretty fucked story. Not super smooth. He's fine. He's fit, so you'd think he'd be fine.

Don't worry about it. His health is fine. This whole situation about the whole thing was kind of fucked. It's a private thing. I don't want to say it. It does seem like a lot of people are... I saw that graph the other

day. This is where we were during the first lockdown and the second lockdown. This is where we are now. Here, I'll pull one out. I wanted to just be like, that's a fake graph. That's bullshit. You mean like the case going up to shit? Because it seems hard to believe. It seems hard to believe.

It's hard to believe. It's like it seems like it's 10 times as much as it was when we were all hiding. Yeah, that is bizarre, isn't it? 10 times is a lot. But also it ties in with my

personal observation. I can think of four people in my real life friend group people i talk to all the time that have had covid lately five with taylor all right so let's okay so can we go back to like i wish we could go oh that is all time what what's that i mean wait that's all that's all time yeah no no that looks about right to me oh okay holy shit all right that's terrible when was it when we were talking about toilet paper wasn't that like june or july of 2021 that's the first bump yeah that's 2020 no no toilet paper was 2020 all right wait all right am i not reading it right okay i can't tell what

december that is let's use this number let's use 35 000 for the seven day average. And now show me where we are now. So I was wrong. It's not 10 times. It's 20 times. It's 20 times bigger than when we were hiding and stealing toilet paper. I know tons of people who are getting it right now too. Also, here's the problem though. Now we have tests that are free and everyone has them.

And so now we know what the case is. Back then, maybe it was three times what it is now. And so now we know what the case back then, maybe it was three times what it is now. I thought I got it at the start. It was like Taylor said, really fast, like flu, almost like the flu,

but not really like something to fill off. And then I slept and I woke up and it was gone. So I've never had that before. This was like a year ago. Yeah. About a year ago. Just odd. I've never been sick like that. The worst part about the

flu or anything is like the fever. I think I had like a fever for a couple hours Tuesday night because I wasn't sleeping very soundly. But if I did have a fever, that was the only time I did. That was about it for me too. It was just like a couple hours.

Neither of you saw any medical attention or anything? I don't know if it was just like a couple hours neither of you saw any medical attention or anything i don't know if it was coveted or not no i didn't need medical attention it was i needed i needed 15 cream soda zevias no i like the idea of like what he said with the with the root beer that's an all-time sorry to interrupt you cop but that's an all-time chart. I'm pretty confident in it. So February 2020, that was... Yeah, those are the two bumps, right? That January one is like when all those New Yorkers died, right? Am I right about that?

When we saw the body bags in the hallway, that was wild. Yeah. Now, if I were to do a death chart, it's not nearly as spiky because this omicron variant's not as deadly it would seem and we understand how to treatment treat it now and how's right the treatment is better now and then there's also like that omicron spike is pretty recent and the spike in cases is it usually takes like 10 to 20 days for the spike in deaths like that accompany it and we. Hard to read these stats. It's hard to interpret correctly.

It's really bad in the last two weeks. The deaths are just coming now. If it's a less severe variant, it should be less. What you need is cases per test administered almost across the board to get any kind of

real stat. That's true. If we're testing people, not just tests administered almost across the board to get any kind of real stat because like if a billion if we're testing we're testing people not just like we're testing the same people all the time over and over like people are constantly getting tested now whereas you're right more tests are going to yield more positives but also more people that think they're sick means more tests too like if it's just the number of positive tests they're free now granted i hear you but like i haven't been i've been tested once and it was because i was sick it turned out to be strep throat but um only sick people get well no mostly sick people

get tests sure uh i don't know i think it's hard to interpret the data but clearly there's seem to be a lot of people getting it in my life recently, anecdotally speaking. Yeah, there's definitely a lot of people getting it. I know so many people in my life who got it. That chart is coinciding with my observations, so I tend to think it's right. I do as well. The only people getting it that I know

are the people that are double-vaxxed, and then I think they let their guard down with it, and then they go just doing things normally. They don't take precautions i think i think everybody's getting it fish is the best right like he's like yeah i got covid people are like oh were you vaccinated he's like yeah yeah and i'm like wait a goddamn minute tell them when you got vaccinated fish the day they told me i had covid wait wait he got it

and then he got the shot? It might have been coincidence. They're like, you have COVID. Have a COVID shot while we're here. You dumbass. Are you supposed to give it to someone who's currently sick? Who cares? Just COVID.

Who cares? You know what? That's actually 100% my take also. Who cares? You know what? That's actually 100% my take also. Who cares? I got two boosters last week. They just hand them out like lollipops. They don't give a shit. Drive around to as many locations as you can in one day.

See how many shots you can get. Has anyone here been boosted? You've been boosted, Kyle. There's no way I'm going into a fucking gym without that booster yeah i get the booster too because i have a trip coming up i've been cagey about the date so people don't know when i'm not home but yeah uh yeah it was part of my motivation for the booster um i about those dates i know what you're talking about i've not been vaccinated yet i was going to before a show like like a concert.

They fucking canceled the concert. So now I'm like, well, I can put it off some more. It's just more of a, like, it's an inconvenience. Call of Duty just came out. So I'm like, well, I'm going to be working every day, you know? So I need to, like, not be, because it can not, you know, the vaccine can knock you the fuck out for a few days so i'm like it's just inconvenient i'll wait i don't really leave the house like it's fine you know yeah the next day after my booster i was pretty much fine like i thought i was fine maybe i lied that i was fine to myself right and then when i hit the gym i got through my warm-up and i i was just like you know what no this is a break day

yeah i was just like i i dude i i wasted so much time between i literally my warm-up took over an hour and i was like i'm not doing more and yeah uh so the next day i got back at it. Kyle, quit with your judgy bullshit. He wasn't feeling well. Let him be a thing that he wants. No, that's for a workflow. Oh, his... Oh, am I bad? Yes, you're bad again. I thought it was me too. I literally thought he was judging me for honestly being a gym day.

I thought it was... Rest day? Double thumbs down. Were you feeling sick? You know what I do when I'm sick? Bench press. I do bad form bench presses. Throwing it up there.

No, take a fucking day off. You got goddamn COVID. Take a day off when you fucking want. Jesus Christ. When I did the edibles earlier this week that knocked me the fuck out, I took too many. I was like, wow, I'm feeling kind of weird. I looked at the label, you know, and I'm like, oh shit. I took like 10 times the amount of milligrams. Yeah. 200 milligrams. And I'm like, okay, I'm going to go

work out. Like I'll start working out. And I started to work out and I'm like, I should not be working out. Like before I do anything, I should stop working out. I should go take my contact lenses out because I might not be able to, you know, later. And I should just like chill. And yeah, it was like I nearly did a full workout, just really stoned. I don't know if that would have been good or bad, but probably bad. You're more likely to make a mistake that'll injure yourself or something like that if you're not feeling 100 in the gym like

i've come around to that that like if i if i'm feeling shitty like not like mentally like physically like i thought if i've got a bunch of soreness or like a sharper pain like i used to be like no just fucking forge your head. That's what hard workers do. And it's like, no, that's stupid. I'm, you know,

basically stealing success from my near future for this unsuccessful on a net basis day of working out. I did a, I did a fucking, um, like a dumbbell shoulder fly, you know, a chest fly or whatever.

Yeah. And I went a little too heavy with that. Kind of like, you know, you're on the bench. Oh, yeah, yeah. And I do those into supersets of just dumbbell presses. Okay, I like that. Yeah, that's been a great chest activator for me. But I went a little

too fucking heavy. I was doing like I think it was 50 or 55 doing that. And at the time, I'm like, okay, I can do it. And I got to go fucking deep like Arnold. He's like doing the fucking dumbbell flies. He's like going way back. Me and Arnold, two peas in a pod.

And I did something to my fucking left shoulder. And it was some kind of rotator cuff sprain or injury oh no um just i could still work out but it was like sore for fucking months you know um just like i i couldn't lift it right or pop and do some weird shit that's a weak area if you get it going the wrong way or hyper're hyperextended. I hurt mine a little bit doing like rear delt stuff on a pec deck because, you know, it can – my pec deck, like we all do, I guess. It can invert so that it's a rear delt thing. You're pushing it back. And I don't know.

I hit the wrong angle, and it put a lot of stress on like a joint or i don't know something in my shoulder and it was very painful yeah and i never fucked with that again i switched to dumbbells and i i do this lane i i don't know i didn't look on the internet i just try to find something that felt good and i end up like putting a towel on like an incline bench and putting my head on that so i can bend over and then like yeah i've seen that before and that actually works so like like i i can't feel much activation when i do the butterflies like like like you're talking about like i want that exercise but i do it and i'm like did i just do anything i i feel like my form i feel more activation with the peck deck itself because i feel like i can focus more so much my pecs i'm

like really like like i can really activate them and feel them burn and when i'm done they're sore as fuck and it's just like i can feel the whole thing like i can isolate exactly you can like as you're bringing it in like you're feeling the tightness as you like especially like right in the center it's just like almost gonna cramp i it's so i don't have a i have a home gym i don't have access to a peck deck, so I'm like, I've got to find something. I felt the same way with you where I was like, man, these fucking dumbbell flies don't do

anything. I'm like, wait, what if I do them? Do them heavy, go deep, and then superset it with fucking presses. No, that makes a lot of sense. That's been better than bench press. I think you just need a spotter. That's one of the things. I would need to go a little bit heavy and i would be afraid that i'd hurt myself like like if but if i had another guy there especially somebody who

knew what they were doing and was stronger than me who could just be like spotting me with those i definitely see i'm just i'm just so at home gym introverted so i do everything by myself so uh like if i'm doing bench press i leave one side of the um the weights like unlocked i leave both off i do everything i do everything alone and and like i don't i i work out with a you know it's over 200 pounds it could be a little bit dangerous if you drop that on yourself so like and i do go to failure like a lot so i always leave them off and i haven't had to do it since i've like started working out the last year or so but back in the day i would always leave them off when i would

work out my basement and i've it's stuck all right here we go you just spill one side off and the other side i know gravity does the rest right and then you tried coffin presses i do coffin presses the are you talking like where you put the yeah for people don't know uh you have dumbbells it's kind of like a bench press except that you pull them against each other sort of tight and do a bench press while you hold them that's a really good one yeah i like that one yeah okay there's a little bit of if there's one downside of it it's that you can be a slacker like a lot of the work in it is self-imposed by how hard you press them together. You need to squeeze.

Let's say I'm using 35s. How hard I work today and how hard I work tomorrow can be very different with the same number written down because a lot of it is based on how hard I'm squeezing it together. I almost wish I had a system where I could be... Every now and then someone takes the gym equipment

and does weird shit with it. I just thought of a thing that what if i take so i got my cable system right it's the cables are rather far but you know i can step over here grab one then like or go to the other one and i got them like i can do my routine yeah so like what if i do that i've got them now they're under tension now i lie on a a bench and they're being pulled away from me, but I also get dumbbells in my grasp and do coffin presses

lying down while the weights are being pulled apart. So I'm having to actively... This is a great idea. Why haven't you added chains and resistance bands to this set up? But why have the... I also have a woman beating me with a bat the entire time.

Have you seen the movie Swordfish where he hacks into the computers while getting blown? And then Halle Berry sucks his dick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that Halle Berry? No, that wasn't Halle Berry. No, it's a blonde skank. They saved Halle Berry's tits for later very many actors

so Kyle I feel like you should suffer some sort of distraction while you're doing this like that add sex to the routine so like physically difficult sex fat women I've got this

we're going to need large the problem is the more jacked I get, the bigger the women have to get. I mean, that's the punishment. If you see me walking around with like a 400 pound chick, you know I am fucking jacked. You know that you're piping that fat pig down nightly. For yokes. But I'm doing walking lunges with her on my back so we all we all work out in some capacity here uh have you this is crazy i've it sounds weird

but i've been working out for what two years now or so and i've never really had to use my strength that makes i've never had to use like my strength in a real thing before like everything's simulated um i called uh i called uh was it i think it was lowe's hardware out to deliver a fridge for me i bought a fridge there i'm like hey can you guys get my old fridge and like you know take it off for me because it's just a big piece of shit it's like 30 years old 20 years old it's it's toast well they they brought the new fridge out while i was like downstairs turning the water off to that fridge they just fucking left so they brought the fridge out left my old fridge and then the new fridge here so i'm like well i can't leave this old fridge yeah fucking dicks right i can't leave this old fridge here so i ended up just as i can put it

it's just fucking there's nowhere to grab on a fridge so i have to just kind of just bear hug it and just kind of like fucking you know walk it out walk it out walk it out and like put it over the lip on the back door and i'm doing all this shit and i'm like pushing it and fucking lifting it and it's awkward and i finally get it out there and i'm like holy shit like i just moved a goddamn like 300 pound fridge where i can't grab it anywhere like i just i just did that i'm like that feels awesome i think i've only done two things that required any real strength like since i've had any real strength and one was picking my motorcycle up because it didn't it fell in an awkward way um so that it

was like extra hard to get back up yeah and i yoinked that thing you only dropped it once ever yeah yeah yeah step up your drop game uh i i i pushed the limit in those parking lots buddy i'm fucking razor walk along the razor's edge i'm leaning that thing over it that parking lot push past the limits and drop your motor crash your bike fucking rough um but but like i was my adrenaline was definitely helping some but i yoinked that bike up and i don't know what it weighs but i guess it weighs 450 or 500 obviously i didn't like pick it up off the ground but you pick it up with one you start the harlem globetrotter thing to spin i stood it up like

it was like nothing i didn't even consider it being like i didn't do that thing where you back up to it like i just grabbed the bike and picked it up and then like my garage door broke and like the spring part that does the work for you so now i have like this this workout routine every time i want to go out did you get that fixed yet honestly i kind of i kind of like that i have a workout and because my sleep schedule it's hard to get a repairman out that at like four in the morning like when i'm free and uh and so i just you know sometimes i add a few reps you know i get down low get it up you know knock out 10 while we're here and then and then throw the door up i have to tie

it with a piece of bailing wire uh then back out then go back lift it up again undo the i enjoy this i enjoyed it like it's really convenient when i have bailing twine and levers Lift it up again. No, I enjoy this. I enjoy this. It's really convenient when I have people over. You've got bailing twine and levers. I'm like holding it with one hand while I explain to the girl that she needs the bailing wire. Yeah, come on. Yes! Yes, all of it! It's always fun.

No, I haven't gotten it fixed, and it's still part of my daily routine. I was putting all the Christmas decorations away. There's Colin and Hope at the bottom of the attic stairs. It's the fold down attic stairs that kind of suck. I like those. The two of them are pressing up like a Christmas

tree and they can barely hold it. They're like, this one's heavy, this one's heavy. It's like, guys, if the two of you can overhead press this, I can one-arm dumbbell curl. Grab the Christmas tree with one hand and pull it up myself. I'm going to break the tree just to assert dominance.

It's in a package. It's wrapped up. We still haven't taken down our Christmas tree. I keep procrastinating it. Fuck that. That pumpkin outside is looking rough. You got a pumpkin outside still? Yeah.

It's just completely gray and fuzzy. My decision to keep the Easter decorations out is about to pay off. No one's laughing. Come Easter. no one's laughing come easter no one's laughing shortly your kids are out there like dad i found a 2018 egg oh the chocolate's rancid did you uh did you do a lot of easter egg hunting as a kid was that something like a tradition yeah Yeah. I loved it. My dad's side of the family, grandparents, they would hide huge amounts of eggs. It felt like a huge amount of eggs. Do you ever...

They lived in a small house. My grandpa was a butcher, and so he didn't make a bunch of money or anything. Oh, it's all starting to make sense now. He was. He was a butcher. money or anything it's all starting to make sense now he he was he was a butcher and he uh like i in my head i had it like they had the biggest yard in america you know what i mean yeah and then like i drove by it many years later and was like that that was the yard that like if we hit a wiffle ball out of we were like that's a real home run that's like a major's home run it's

fucking 20 yards at the longest. It's just not very long at all. But yeah, we did Easter egg hunting a good bit. Did you? When you say, oh, sorry to interrupt. No, no, no, go ahead. When you say eggs, do you mean, would you guys mean real eggs?

No, no, they were little plastic eggs that would have like Hershey's Kisses. We did real fucking eggs. Oh, you guys did real? We did only fake eggs? We did boiled eggs. They would have... There was a really good egg every year that had $5 in it.

That was the huge egg. Some other ones would have $0.50 in quarters, but it was mostly candy. My father had a client. This guy did a Christmas egg hunt that he would invite us to and many other people to. It was like a big event. And his yard was large.

It was a Christmas tree farm. Yeah, but you could tell these trees will be sold four years from now, five years from now, next year, etc. And he would just spray. And the loot in them was worthwhile there was one egg it was like smaller than a human head like maybe an infant's head and it had $100 in it if I recall

this is like $194 this sounds fun $194 so it's $300 now this is a retirement plan this sounds like something I want to do next month in real life. Yeah. It was legit.

And there was a section for little kids. I was older than that. The eggs were easily found. Yeah. And then the bigger kids would go and they'd be covered by leaves and stuff like that. And I'm sure they weren't all found. They couldn't have been. But there were enough out there that you could get stuff.

And it was cool. It was a good time. I look forward to it every year. This little kid in my neighborhood, we made the plastic eggs, of course. And we made hard-boiled eggs, Easter eggs. I hope that I'm clear. I'm coming through clear. I hope so.

You're good. Yeah, you're good. And this little kid in my neighborhood, he's probably like, he's got to be maybe five or six, little tiny Mexican kid. His name, I'm not going to dox him, but he's a little tiny guy. He comes over. We got Easter eggs, and he just is one of those kids that's kind of nosy. He's like, what are you doing, mister? What's going on?

You come over, and my dad's like, we got Easter eggs. The kid takes an egg. He's like, what do you do with this? And my dad's like, you eat them. They're hard-boiled eggs. You eat them. And the He's like, what do you do with this? My dad's like, you eat them. They're hard-boiled eggs. You eat them. The kid's like, oh. He eats it with the shell on it and everything.

I was like, no, no, no. It's a candy shell. It looks like candy. Maybe that's what it was. What a dumbass. I didn't have to be explained how to eat eggs. Her name was Miley whatever the fuck from earlier in the show um yeah she she bites it goes um but no uh i i wanted to eat the eggs like i wanted to eat the eggs like that as a kid myself because they look kind of like candy like on the outside they

look like an m&m or something you know so like yeah so i wouldn't blame him too much you know it caught me so off guard. I was like, oh my gosh, this kid's parents are going to come beat me up. That's actually a badass thing to do if you're in a fight or about to get in a fight. Just grab a horrible egg. Just fucking bite into it. Or a raw egg. Just bite into it.

Guys, I don't want to fight this guy. He's clearly retarded. That's what you do i mean that i can't imagine the disappointment on easter of being told that my treat is a hard boiled egg that i guarantee i guarantee that bitch making the hard boiled eggs was not paying attention to the time they were in there to make sure the yolk is nice and yellow it was that hardened green outside yolk 12 minutes crappy kind yeah 12 minutes that's all you need then you put it in the ice water yeah no you put the eggs in you put the eggs in the cold water you turn the water to hot uh set the timer for 12 you get

the water boiling uh put the lid on turn the heat off 12 minutes take them out ice water they're perfect dude this happened this happened like less than a month ago now I'm thinking of it. I was stoned out of my mind late one night and I didn't have any snacks here. And so I hard boiled myself like seven eggs and I ate all of them. And all in one sitting. Yeah. Yeah. And like I, I was making myself, I almost made myself throw up the next day from a

shower fart because like in the shower it's so hot in there the smell it permeates so quickly it's the steam yeah yeah yeah the steam carries the smell so quick. Like, you think about farting, and you can smell. Sorry, that sounds like it's always sunny, like episode or something. Like, you have seven eggs, then you make yourself sick the next day. Not from eating them, but from farting in the shower. I don't know. And at the time, I was like, this makes sense. This is a snack people eat.

I even remember thinking, like, this makes sense. This is a snack people eat. I even remember thinking, this is healthy. Seven eggs at 1am on everyone. My wife's asleep. I'm just playing magic on my tablet high as shit. Do you salt them? Yes, of course. Yeah. Hot sauce. I feel like I would be

tempted just to make egg salad or something at that point and have egg salad sandwiches. I could do that. I could take seven eggs and make egg salad sandwiches and eat seven of those man mayonnaise and maybe relish yeah i eat like six eggs and four egg whites for breakfast so it's like seven eggs that sound crazy to me eggs are like the most fucking filling uh food for me i can't i can't usually have more than five or i don't scramble them anymore. They make me sick to look at. I just eat them raw. Really?

Never been sick? No, I don't believe in that. I just blend them up with a scoop of protein powder. If you don't believe in it, I can't get you. I don't believe that moving cars can hurt me. I'll tell you what I don't. He's yet to be proven wrong like i don't know how people get sick from eggs like the eggshells are clean obviously you're

keeping them in the fridge and like like what am i gonna do like crack an egg like leave it on the counter for a day and then come back and eat it like no i'm cracking and eating it it seems like that there's like that one in ten thousand chance chance or something. You get salmonella. But I'm looking forward to it. They also punched up the danger of salmonella. When I was a kid, I remember my mom being like, I've had it too. But I remember my mom being like, you can't eat too much cookie dough because you could get salmonella. And it was like, I'm willing to say that. That's a lie that Big Mom tells.

Big Mom lie. He's in the pocket of Big Mom spreading deep state bullshit. Now, these moms are telling us we can't eat cookie dough as much as we want. This is 100% verifiably false. Look at my body. Look at how red I am. My cholesterol is through the roof because of cookie dough. You know, that could be

Alex Jones or it could be Colonel Sanders After like I don't know Too much weed or something I don't know what Colonel Sanders sounds like He sounds kind of like that I would wager he's racist I've never been more sure Of a fictitional character being racist than Colonel Sanders.

Have you seen the John Goodman comedy skit? Oh, we have the finest chicken for all customers. Well, most customers. Taylor is going to sell fried chicken, can't you? Are you seriously going to not allow a certain race to come in? Well, i'm a racist that's how he would do he'd be willing to leave the money on the table have you seen the john goodman version of colonel sanders like that comedy skit no oh it's incredible i love john

goodman there's a part where he's like he's like that's right colonel santa don't care colonel sanders doesn't care if you're gay or black or purple. And then he looks at the camera real close and he goes, I'm going to tell you the truth. I don't give a shit what color you are or what you do. You're all just money mouths. He's just like being evil as shit and gay. And like, it's pretty great.

That's hilarious. John Goodman is one of those actors like i wish he was in more stuff because i uh what was it called 10 cloverfield lane is that right i was gonna say yeah he's great that's i love that movie first off oh brother where art thou he kills it but i think there's something called in the electric mist where he's uh maybe in louisiana and he has like a role maybe some kind of like criminal um guy or something but i remember him being good in that i think uh in the electric mist maybe something like that i remember like my dad got really excited once when i was a child at a at a cardinals game because like we were

walking into the cards game and john goodman is from st louis and so and we were walking by and he was like taylor that was john goodman and i'm like eight i'm like neat dad i don't know who that is but it wasn't until later that's like oh that was neat john goodman parked in the shitty area where people want to save money also. He had that fucking Roseanne money, but he still was parking in the free area with us. That must have been good money. You're saying Roseanne money wasn't good money?

No, I said it must have been good money. I heard you say it must be good. Kyle, you were acting like it wasn't. I was saying it probably wasn't even John Goodman. Oh. It's just some other fat guy from the Midwest. Because I'm like, you know, I don't think John Goodman parks out there. I'm pretty sure, like, John Goodman probably has, like, box seats or something, right?

He is John Goodman. One time I saw the white Power Ranger at a Target, and my sister's dad got me an autograph from him when I was like four. I've had that autograph for years and I'm convinced now he worked at Target. It was not the white Power Ranger. That was not the white Power Ranger.

Did y'all know the white Power Ranger was black? That's pretty fucking great. You know, the first season, like, I think everybody knows this maybe now, but like all of the, like the Kung Fu fighting and like all that stuff was from some Japanese show. Oh yeah. So they just bought like all this footage

of like guys in suits fighting like putties and shit. And then they were like, how can we use this? And then they made Power Rangers. So like power rangers are in high school hanging out they're like oh no now we gotta go fight the putties and then they just play the japanese show yeah and it it meshes pretty well because it is a stupid show but that does make sense why so many of the fight scenes like they're in the backyard of their high school and then they're suddenly in a mountainous region of japan yeah yeah yeah have you guys ever seen the movie kung pao yes yeah yes amazing movie it just reminds me of that same thing it's like they took old footage and made it like they dug over it and made it into a comedy like old martial arts films became this comedy

that made no sense is that really what they did? Yeah, they took a bunch of different movies and put them together. Yeah, that's one of the gags. They intentionally, I think, tried to make it not match up. Wait, wait, wait. This is the movie where the guy has a chubby friend and they're like street rats. No, that's Kung Fu Hustle.

Okay, never mind then. Kung Fu Hustle is also a great movie though. I was like, Kung Fu Hustle is like re-dubbed? Like that was supposed to be serious? Because I think there's a part where a guy uses like some sort of Chinese mandolin to like kill people. Yeah, I love that movie. Watch Kung Pao if you haven't seen it. It's called Kung Pao Enter the Fist.

It's hilarious. It's very good. Yeah, it's super funny, man. Okay. Can recommend it as well. Yeah, there's a scene where he's fighting a cow and they do the Matrix joke, which was so overdone in the 2000s

or whatever. Now I do remember. Yeah, you remember the cow. I think they're fighting. The cow stands up, I think. Utter punches. He's got the tongue.

Not even a little. Wait, that, that was written and directed by Steve Oda Kirk. That's the guy from a better call Saul, right? Yeah. No,

that's, that's, no, that's a Bob Odenkirk. You're thinking, let's pretend. Nevermind. This isn't interesting.

Let's pretend you're right. Because then you can connect Brian C cranston to all this because he was one of the like guys in the suits and power rangers like fighting the mega mega droid or whatever the megazoid yeah yeah yeah he was he was he was in one of those like monster suits doing the fighting back in the day were you guys like i know pj is my age were you guys into power rangers or ninja turtles more because i was definitely a ninja turtles kid more than the power rangers ninja turtles here it was ninja turtles when i was like five and six and seven but like it definitely became power rangers around like seven or eight because like

that was a lot more popular and um and and you know the power rangers kick shit so like we all wanted to kick shit now in the playground and jump off of playground equipment. And we got hurt a lot. When I was in high school, Ninja Turtles became a thing, and some people liked them. And the rest of us were like, the fuck is wrong with you? We're in high school. This is a show for children.

Shouldn't you like girls by now? Yeah, it would be weird for someone Woody's age back then to be into the Ninja Turtles. That wouldn't make a lot of sense. But I was like I actually came after the He-Man shit, but for whatever reason

I was super into it. You know what I love was Beetleborgs. Did you guys ever watch that? Yeah, yeah. Big bad Beetleborgs. Yeah. I never got into that one. Terrible show. Terrible? I loved it. It was great. You can tell a lot about me from that. I remember in my head thinking that the Street Sharks is what cool kids watched. I remember seeing that jacked great white shark who was the leader of the bunch being like,

Damn, I want to be as cool as that guy. I want to be the street shark. How much would it suck to be the hammerhead? Well, no. The hammerhead looks pretty cool. Yeah, but his whole life is ruined now. You know what? It's going to be hard to walk around. The shark

bitches don't want to fuck him because he's weird looking. Yeah, he's weird looking. He's completely different. Dude, the hammerheads were so cool at the aquarium the weird looking. Yeah, he's weird looking. He doesn't look completely different. Dude, the hammerheads were so cool at the aquarium the other day. Yeah, hammerheads are the coolest sharks. Oh, they're neat looking. Are they sponsored by Black & Decker still? They are.

At the Baltimore Aquarium, all their hammerheads are sponsored by Black & Decker. At least they used to be. Oh, it's home to people at the Georgia Aquarium. Like, everything's sponsored. See, it's not that crazy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like, they built... I the Georgia like everything's sponsored. It's not that crazy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like they built I don't nonsense.

I just got that hammerhead. Nonsense there after you paid. That's sick. I think that's my favorite of your tattoos. I like that one.

Keep the sleeve rolled up the whole episode. Keep the sleeve just the one sleeve. It's a little it's a little flaky. But yeah, you need to take up smoking and keep a pack of cigs in that sleeve. It's just the one sleeve. It's a little flaky, but yeah. You need to take up smoking and keep a pack of cigs in

that sleeve. Oh, thank you for going full screen. That's pretty cool. Dude, I love the blue so much. Why the hammerhead? I just watched Jaws, and I was like, okay. Is that shirts to the strangers? That's not the kind of shark that's in Jaws. It's not the kind of shark that's in Jaws, but I

was just like, everybody kind of gets a regular shark. I'm going to get a hammerhead. Why'd you get a dolphin? Why don't I just watch Jaws? You know, I just watched a movie about the sea as a whole. Why did you get a shark tattoo? You know that movie with the dog that get lost and comes home?

Homeward Bound? Homeward Bound? Homeward Bound, yeah. I just saw it. I used to watch it. Solid movie. When I was a kid, I used to watch Flipper. You guys ever heard of Flipper? I watched a bit of Flipper.

They did kind of the same thing where they had just stock footage of fucking sea creatures. And one of the big things was like Flipper fighting a fucking hammerhead. So I was like, you know what? Let's get a fucking hammerhead. I just watched Jaws. I like sharks. Should have got Flipper. He was like undefeated. I should have. You know, maybe I will. Maybe I will. Hammerheads are bitch made according to that documentary.

Whenever you get like the first few tattoos, you're trying to attach all this meaning to it and then after like two or three, you're like just give me something cool. This looks cool. I'm thinking about getting a tattoo. I've been thinking about it for like since I was 15 so I figure you know after this long maybe.

Do you have any tattoos PJ? I don't have any tattoos. There's a few that I have in mind but I'm kind of on Woody's page and maybe possibly yours and Kyle's maybe. Definitely not Blame Truth trips but I'm in this position where I kind of want to get a couple maybe to um symbolize the whole social media thing that I've done uh I think that that's cool maybe just something as simple as a little

like press play button um definitely maybe a jujitsu tattoo maybe a phase tattoo those right now with three a black belt around my waist oh no three. A black belt around my waist? Oh, just a full black belt around your waist? A little tied one. I don't know what would be a faux. No, no. I know what would be really cool. A black belt tramp stand? Across your chest, the word

black belt. By my neck? Pull it down. Yo, I don't know if you want to mess with me buddy they don't give these to just anybody you can't get this off amazon you got you got black belt and comic sans there are some cool like black belt tattoos one of my friends speaking of sharks and stuff he has like the outline of a shark but it's uh it's an outline of a shark but it's a black belt so it's like the outline of one it's kind of cool there's some like neat little things like that um a big jujitsu meme is saying you know the ground is my ocean and you don't

know how to swim and i'm a shark and even if you're a lion if i throw you in the ocean you're just another meal for shark i think yeah don. Don't do it with that many words. It says in the beginning, imagine if you will. Big paragraph. Right here. But just paraphrase the way you did it. Not written well at all.

It's just like, the ocean is... That's pretty good. I like that yeah there's some cool ones man i'll make you like some cool ones if i was gonna get a black belt i'm uh that's a big penis there um the skull one the skull one's pretty cool but it you kind of lose it looks like he's biting um oh yeah well it's biting the har, yeah. It looks like the skull is biting... They ripped off the Harry Potter shit. That's the skull.

See, that's not good because there's a piece of tape on there, and you get multiple pieces of tape over time. See, you add it on over time. It looks like he's biting an alternator belt. You kind of lose it. It's a black belt. It looks like he's the skull of someone getting fucked by a stronger black belt he died in a automotive repair incident and his skull yeah yeah you gotta you gotta be

careful pj with the with the tattoos because every single person i know even the people who have been like hesitant about getting tattoos the second they get that first one the the floodgates open and they're like getting additional tattoos all the time like i don't i don't know a single i know tons of my friends have tattoos i don't know a single person who has one tattoo should i get one in mexico that seems like a good honestly honestly like i don't think it's a bad idea i mean i mean i wouldn't get weight loss surgery there but i didn't tap out that one's a good one okay literally it looks like a different guy put in didn't it looked like i couldn't tap out. Jesus, tap out. He had three different artists work on it.

I believe the tap out one was first. Jesus is so poorly done, it's painful. The D is sideways and so is the N. They're all different sizes. The shark tattoo, not bad.

They're a few. And apostrophes never look good in tattoos that shark tattoo is terrible what are you talking about oh i think it's artsy you don't think that's fucking horrible i'm gonna come back it's terrible i'm gonna start with one like you said i'm gonna get a little phase tattoo here a little play button here you're gonna see me the next podcast in five years pka jujitsu something oh yeah you're right being a retard to own some idiot online ruining your body for it yeah i i've never gotten a tattoo i there were definitely phases in my life where i was seeing a bunch of friends get tattoos and I was trying to think of something I would want.

And I can't think of a single thing. Like I made a joke like, oh, if the Blues ever win a Stanley Cup, maybe I'll get a tattoo of that. And then it happened and it was like, I don't like them that much. Like it is just a hockey team I follow. So I don't want that yeah i think that i'm kind of in that boat of like i would want something that means a lot to me first and then i would be like yeah let's just get some random stuff now like a samurai fighting a i don't know an octopus it does seem like cool well it does seem like it's like a cherry you're popping and like

once you get past that initial tattoo it's just now what can i think of that would be kind of cool is that how you feel blame truth about that uh when i got my first tattoo i thought it was kind of cool that i only have one so i got one for a long time like 10 year gap and then i'm like you know what like i'm getting older like let's just fucking do this so in in the past, God, what is it? Two years? I've just gotten two, three, four, five.

I mean, I've lost count. Like ten. That's a lot. My problem is I've thought about some of the tattoos I would have gotten ten years ago, and I'm glad I don't have them. So why do I think Machinima! Machinima!

Premier director. Yo, I would seriously, I would love to have You're like taking your shirt off slow at the gym. I think I'm gonna get I swear to God I think I'm gonna get the fucking Machinima Respawn logo somewhere on me. I'm not sure. the fucking Machinima Respawn logo somewhere on me.

You were a premier director, right? Yeah. They wouldn't accept me. Weren't we all? We were like five. Then they expanded it and they started giving it to everyone. They gave it to literally hundreds of people.

I'm pretty sure we all got participation. I was a fucking nobody and I got it that was i don't know but there was a time when there were like five and it meant that if you put it on their channel you were like at the head of the line you know there was the junkyard yeah initially it was like uh junkyard ken burns c nanners hutch like those were the truth right for me yeah i was the thing? Yeah. Yeah, one of the big guys who got it. And I remember at the time thinking like, that's so cool. I'm just a regular director in the premium.

I was talking to my wife about Dirty Business People and how it killed machinima, right? If you make a win-win deal, okay, an agent should take somewhere between like 5% and 50% of your pay, depending on what you bring to the table. If you're like a pro hockey player, they take like a couple percent for negotiating your contract. But you're really the guy making all the money. If you're a no-name actress or YouTuber and they bring a big deal to you, the agent can take half of it. But it's almost fair because without them, there would have been no deal. The same is not true in the because without them there would have been no deal yeah

right the same is not true in the nhl there would have been a deal hopefully they made it better by more than you paid them cool machinima would take 90 of your money ea had a deal with machinima and it was like a 10 cpm and it might have been 80 it was a 10 cpm and machinima took eight of those dollars and gave two to the director they didn't take that much from me but i signed with them before i'm still going oh no problem ea found out about it and stopped working with machinima and started working directly with directors they cut out machinima from the deal because machinima was fucking over everybody over that's the kind of

like fuck over shit that seemed like you were making tons of money once when they could have made less money again and again and again and again it could be it's a bad call you're 100% right they could be massive right now they could be one of like the the the tent poles of youtube and gaming they could have so much. They were bad businessmen in an outstanding position to succeed. A big part of why they failed is

one, they invested a ton of money trying to be the stars themselves instead of agents to the stars. Two, the agents of the stars thing, they were crooks. Every part of their business like venture was like the short-term gains kind of thing it's a pump it and dump it kind of scheme they just wanted to milk it dry when it was clear that it had so much potential like they had so much talent what were you trying to say blame tooth i was just gonna say i didn't get paid uh

i think because i signed on so early i got some kind of weird deal where i was getting more than that more than um you said they would take like 90 or whatever uh i think mine was closer to like they would only take about half with my particular deal this was a specific thing having to do with an ea opportunity that was was for a few videos on a battle state or whatever. I had no idea. I just went to Machinima and Machinima Response channel. They deleted all their videos.

They're just 100% dead. I tried to apply for them way back in the day and unfortunately they turned me down so I can't be with the cool kids like you guys, but Yowsh hit me up. Y'all remember Yowsh? Oh, I do.

I remember Yowsh. I signed to them. I was on a 60-40 deal for seven years before I noticed. I remember when Machinima sent out, like, we all had our contracts, you know, with our set CPM amount. contracts you know with our set cpm amount and i remember talking to like woody and and kyle and other people at the time when they sent out those new contracts you remember and it was like a a new because they made you sign a perpetuity contract and then you got they sent a new contract out and all that it did was if you signed it and sent it back you would get less money like that's all that it was and i remember talking to

like woody kyle other smart people i was a fucking child at the time and i'm like are you guys like signing these and sending them back what's going on and everyone was like fuck no dude do not sign that do not send it back you are signed on a perpetuity contract with them they can't undo that one they're trying to like supersede that with this new new signing don't do it and i'm like okay thank you real quick before kyle gets back do you think if i ask him nicely he'll unblock me on twitter uh he probably doesn't have his twitter login if kyle even had access to i don't even know i'm blocked i would be shocked if he do his own password you're blocked no but i can do you one better i'll block you on twitter right now

my guy thank you how about he blocked me like 2012 when i asked to come on the podcast like so long ago i was like yo guys can i come on the podcast i just like tweeted it and it got probably six retweets he's like blocked dude i tried to work with yash here's what happened like they so for starters i made a lot of videos i made at first one video a day and then i got to be two videos a day and at my peak i got a good amount of views like 150 to 250 000 views a video cool so yash would have these deals where like it was first come first serve but it was like a million views so and then for that million views though the cpm was really high it'd be like four dollars and they circled me in and i'm like sweet sign me up i'll take a four dollars on top of the

whatever i got already like two or two and a half or something and uh then of their million view inventory that they had to sell i would take like 550 000 of it over that week and the rest of their network would split the other 450 and they kicked me out of the network for like because i guess i wasn't for really dominating too hard yeah they came well part of it was my videos get views but another part of it was i made so fucking many i make it like two every day. And it just, you know, but when it ran out, I used up all their things and they kicked me out of the network. I totally forgot about. Yeah, I miss the old days, man, when it was like for sure a community community.

Like we all knew that there was like only 50 of us. And even though at the time maybe i only had i started in 2010 so i only had a few thousand subs like that year um but i feel like these big guys were reaching out to me i did a dual comm with wings of redemption back in the day it's like the community just tight-knit you too right that's crazy we've all done dual comms with no come on no i've done a dual com with wings did you no way i came in there dude i was so prepared for my dual com with wings of redemption it was like my big shot and i gave him some gameplay that i thought was pretty good you did too kyle and uh i had talking points and time stamps so like wherever the conversation went if there was ever a down like a down moment or like a

silent part i it was like here's the thing coming up at one minute and 54 seconds that i'll explain and and like i i was more than prepared for that i had a same on kill in that video where like okay one of the rules in call of duty is if you were looking at a spawn the spawn the person wouldn't spawn there so you never really saw people spawn. But there was a bit of a glitch on this match, and that if you looked at it through a chain link fence, which you could shoot through, they would spawn right in front of you. And for a period in the game, I just sat there killing people

as they popped up in front of my sights. And I don't know. It was the kind of thing people like to learn. You want to hear the best thing about my dual comm with wingsings is that it took me, A, a little bit of time because I had to get a sniper MOAB in MW3 in free-for-all, which was tough. Gosh darn. I ended up doing it. And he took, like, way long time. I forget what it was.

It appeared about a couple months before he got around to doing the dual comm with me. And then he didn't even link me. Oh. And, like, i had won the whole competition to do this i remember i was i was like nervous leading up to my dual comm with wings and my dual comm with woody because they were both very big guys and i was like this is your chance and i remember like thinking for some reason that like Wings was like a consummate professional. Like in my head, like this is 2010.

And so I went into it and I was like, we were sitting on the call before we were going to start. And I'm like nervous. My heart's pounding. I'm like, I hope I give a good impression because he's such a big guy. He's got 12,000 subs or 20 000 subs whoever was and like right before we start i'm like ready to go he's like you good i'm like yeah and he goes okay well hold on a minute i gotta go tt what is like tt did he have to poop no he had to go pee you know it's like but he said

that's what he said okay okay that's all right can i tell you my story and I was like, I gotta go to T. It's like pee pee. Okay, that's... Can I tell you my story? I'm all excited, right? And I'm doing a dual con with Wings, like my big chance. I'm prepared and I've got all my ducks in a row and I'm ready to do this dual con. He cancels on me. We have to do another day.

Okay, alright. I get this is nothing to you, but to me, this is my big moment, but fine, fine, fine The next day, we're about to do our dual comp. He's like, what do you do for constipation? Do you have a grandma? I was like, Frosted Mini-Wigs is kind of magic on me.

Maybe. Wiggins is great, man. He was one of the first guys i ever watched actually i think like him chris smooth some of the optic guys so when i got around to doing the dual com with him i was like the same way uh taylor i was like oh my goodness this this is insane i'm gonna i'm gonna throw up and uh yeah i still gained like a few thousand subscribers but i think he ended up linking me like later in the week or something like that. I was like, oh, shoot. That was my chance.

What if the reason he didn't link you is because he still had that constipation? It's possible. Every dual comm, he just gets constipated. He gets nervous, too. PJ, you shouldn't feel alone. He also forgot to link me. Oh, shoot. Let's grab drinks sometime. He linked me, too.

I didn't know who he was he had seen like i don't know maybe a machinima video i'd uploaded or maybe it was something on my channel like like some modern warfare 2 gameplay and i asked if i wanted to do a dual comm and i was like well i don't think i have any footage you know any gameplay to like give you right now to do one do you want to wait till i get some or whatever you know i can get some this weekend i'm sure and he's like let's just do my video and you just come talk with me i was like fine that's perfect that's less work for me and i can continue to get paid for my own stuff and if you say you know that works and that's that infamous thing where like he's talking to me about being on the korean um like going to korea to play starcraft or

whatever and i didn't know any better i was i'm blown away i'm like god i'm this guy's like some sort of like elite global gaming athlete like like like i'm in rarefied like air here like like i better be nice to this guy maybe he could show me the ropes on the global scene i believed it all i thought that this guy was so cool he seemed so confident his gameplay was so good and apparently he'd like traveled the world like plying his trade i was impressed that's so amazing when you look back at like all that stuff and like uh i think taylor had just said he had 12 000 subscribers is huge i remember when i first heard that like some of these guys were making a thousand dollars a month from playing games i was blown away i was like dude

if i can make a thousand dollars a month, I wouldn't need anything anymore. I wanted my first paycheck. It was, uh, was $2,000. And I got it when I was 18. Yep. From, from YouTube and stuff. And I remember just being like, Holy shit. Like I'm dropping out of college and let's get, how old are you now? I am 32, about to be 33 in march yeah happy early birthday thank you thank you um it's it's funny you guys mentioned wings i never did a dual con with wings i've always been cordial with him over the years he doesn't think you like him i know i like him it's because i i use him as as he's got some memes so i use those in videos sometimes i feel like even if you don't like wings you can't help but like him. He might have saw me in the

troll discord. I would go there for meme clips to put in my videos and stuff like that. I think he also felt like you never did a dual comm with him and you were shutting him out of the cool kids club. I mean, it wasn't that because I did it like cn

did do that to him yeah uh cn is was like that because because and because it was kind of messed up because like everybody went to call 35 world at war for like a minute and then they were like you know what four was the way to go let's keep making videos of that and they kind of did and that game the the content evolved for another year. But there were two guys who made videos of World at War. And they were Sea Nanners and they were Wings of Redemption. And it only made sense for them to collaborate at some point. Because they were the only guys on the scene that even did videos for this shit. And Wings always felt like Sea Nanners was really snubbing him by not wanting to collaborate.

Wings was correct. He was. And this was before Wings had ever said anything that you could judge too harshly. He was the campy guy who liked to shit on people. That was it.

And he was a little red. Whereas Sea Nanners, Wings of Redemption... A blue, you mean? I'm saying redneck, but nice. Oh, I see. Whereas Sea Nanners drank wine yeah he enjoyed his rosé or whatever it is with his games and at night they were different people yeah they were very different this is true with that said though i mean i did dual comms with uh fucking like uh

hutch back in the day and um uh who like Tabe. If you guys remember him. Tabe's been on the show. Yeah, there you go. What does Tabe do now? Does anybody know? I don't think he likes me very much because I called Hutch a retard. I think he likes Hutch. So I think he unfollowed me. He must really like Hutch.

That's all it took. So you have a bit of a feud with Hutch, right? Not really. I right not not really i just think not really um i it's like one of those things where i just i don't i don't dislike hutch i just can't i think hutch can be very difficult to disagree with amicably i've i've tried to i can't follow the man it feels like i'm following if i follow him on social media it feels like i'm opening up facebook and seeing like my family you know what i mean or something like that he seems to be really like into politics and and a lot of stuff like that like to the point where

it's almost i wonder if it's a stressor for him in real life like maybe i i don't get it like i don't understand being that that need it's not just that it's that it's that he has it's like he tries to have the worst possible opinion that he can't um he had some kind of opinion about skill-based matchmaking or something in call of duty like motherfucker i play this game like i'm better than you at call of duty i can say that uh i think that's a given i'm like motherfucker i played this game for 15 years i've been around as long as you have. How are you this dense when it comes to this? You're in the same fucking field. Are you just saying things to ruffle feathers or just have the worst possible take you can?

In which case, it worked because you ruffled my feathers. Is this about the game or politics we're talking about? I don't know where you stand on skill-based matchmaking but i would assume that you're against it i'm against it because uh it's it's at the at the um it basically hurts your connection if you're better so you get put it sacrifices connection quality which is not what you want to ever do you never want to do that in an online game ever i don't care if it's fucking i didn't even know that i think it's just wrong because like you it should just be a level playing field for everyone we're all playing this thing together my problem let me jump in it sacrifices friendships that's my problem right like prior

to skill-based matchmaking a guy like blame truth would be very welcome on my team blame truth is super strong player it's fun to have them on your side with skill-based skill-based matchmaking suddenly blame truth makes the other team good suddenly i suck all night long because i'm surrounded by professional e-athletes when i want to play with people at my own level and yeah it's like blame truth i like you but you ruined my night with your kd and now i don't my favorite my favorite games are the opposite of skill-based matchmaking i love it like i have i have gear sufficient enough and tarkov at this point that there are a lot of people who just can't kill me if they're shooting me in the chest or the head like their guns won't do that to me 22 shots yeah yeah yeah like i could i could shoot what you get for i could be dancing around in front of them they could just be emptying their guns in me like their guns just don't work anymore

and uh and that's that's how it should be like that's how i have i got shit on for the last two weeks now i have gear you you've earned that you've earned that like i worked so hard yeah yeah no um it's funny what are you mentioning that because i actually played uh some black ops cold war with my my buddy and his dad uh i would say they're both below average you know below 1kd and i get in those lobbies and at first it's fun for me because i'm like man these guys fucking suck and i'm stropping you know uh like the highest streaks you can every game nobody's's shooting shit down. They're having a good time because they're winning. But then by game three, the game's like, nah, man.

Like, no more. It just puts in clones of me on the other team while I am playing with lower tier competitions. And then nobody's having fun. I'm like, I don't have a team. You guys are getting shit on.

And they were just like, hey, man, we like you for a few games, but we can't play with you. We got to go back to our lower tier lobbies. That's literally what they told me. The Ferris thing is just a mixed bag. Just reach your hand in. You get a random team. I love it when we play against the 10th prestigious. I love it when we get the random guys that are all terrible.

Why not? That was what was so fun about, I did a thing on Black Ops 4 on stream live. No, no, you know, completely legit. Just playing with people from stream. I'm like, let's see how far we could take this win streak. And me and my stream viewers partied up every fucking time this was stream live.

We hit, I think it was a 320 something win streak in Black Ops 4. Just not even, not even talking. I'm listening to the fucking Metallica, you know, half the time. And it's just like, it's just like, uh, you simply, you simply cannot do that. Now. That was something that I could do. That was just me and some random people hop on. You don't even have to be that good.

Just as long as you're, you know, as long as you're're communicating and such we weren't even doing that i mean we weren't even doing that yeah we were just i mean non-verbally is what i'm games are absolutely the most games are the most fun when you're absolutely dominating not like a close game like a close win can be satisfying but i want to absolutely dominate i like i like it's so night and day difference that like when we would like get into a lobby like like if we're playing like a full team of people playing pubs or whatever like you immediately feel the difference once when the other team is good you're like oh shit okay never mind never mind all right it's a good team so no don't get switch to your good kids m16 red dots yeah switch to our try hard stuff yeah like like

when you get like pre-fired immediately or you catch that spawn then you're like uh i'm dead yeah me too i'm about to jug mp5 he's in three story he's in three story like when they start taking position on you like everybody's like mood switches and everybody starts tryharding and that's what's that's so fun because you never know like with call of duty it's match you based on connection are you matching against fucking mlg gods with this or are you matching against you know people that just got their fucking Xbox last week? That's so much fun. It's a mixed bag. It keeps things exciting. I argued with Hutch. His argument was like,

we're going to protect the lower skill players. I'm like, motherfucker, it's so easy to cheat. It's so easy to exploit that. I got a PS5 and an Xbox Series X. I can fucking session join this dummy account it takes you know 30 minutes to make this like account shit i just fucking session join it

i could literally shit on noobs all day but that's boring i don't like when it's like that i like it when it's just it happens i like to just search for a match if they're bad cool if they're good like that's how tarkov as well like you never know what you're gonna get into like exactly we'll play five six raids in a row and we're just shitting on kids who don't have a lot of armor and then suddenly it's like i'm dead oh it's it's eight five a one he had a raid bag and a slick and it's like oh no like the mood completely changes it's like we're we're fighting a big man now like this it's it's big boy time and only that but but uh call of duty's never really had anything to play for like if you put me in these harder skill lobbies give me something for it i get not i get shit everything that's worth getting in the fucking game i have to buy

i'm not buying some virgin anime dildo shit you know from the store for like 20 bucks were you and hutch arguing again about skill mate based matchmaking no i just i just did the smart thing and just like he's blocked and everything i just blocked him until he shows up in your skill-based matchmaking he offered he offered to uh have me come on his stream and we debate skill-based skill-based matchmaking and i'm like i can't imagine anything more boring than that. I was going to say, dude, I think some people from the PK subreddit said I should do that too. And I'm like, I just don't really want to do it because it doesn't matter how much I prove him wrong.

He's just going to... He's like a soundboard. You know, like you hit 10 different things. He's just going to say those things. You're going to prove him wrong. He's going to go to another one of those things. The cycle repeats because I've done it before on Twitter. Not that I'm always right, but there's some things he's been misinformed on.

People will see us talking about it. They'll be like, no, Hutch, you're wrong. BT's more on the right here. I don't want to debate. There's no debate. He's just wrong. There's nothing to debate. I don't want to debate. There's no debate.

He's just wrong. There's nothing to debate. It's definitely more fun when you're not hamstrung by having to play competent players. It's more fun for people to tee off. But this is the rift in your relationship, skill-based man. This is a silly thing. It's a systemic issue

and this is a prime example because we could be talking about the fucking carbon footprint of a Chipotle burrito and it would still go the wrong fucking way and end up being frustrating. I think I like Hutch more than Hutch likes me. I'm pretty sure Hutch doesn't like me.

Why doesn't he like you? I just get that vibe. I'll pop into streams and talk and stuff and he'll pretend not to see me and that's just his that's just his stream don't worry buddy he popped into my stream i pretended not to see him i don't know i just often feel a little like like he's not down he doesn't like me it's okay i i do an asymmetrical relationship. He loves me. Does he? No.

I thought he was like, man, got a big owl fucking poster in the background of his stream or something. I mean, this is a verifiable fact. Hutch is one of my biggest fans. He's always DMing me, messaging

me, and I'm like, get out of here man with your fanboy nonsense yeah i get it you you like stuff like this you liked my retarded asian character and you you loved it no i don't think you would like most of the characters i've done on the show no he uh it the main rift was when he went i think it was when trump won the first election and he went super political after that. And I'm like, dude, this is like, this isn't healthy. It's cool to be into something, but to be into it this much. I mean, I'm really into COD, but I don't go out with my friends and start talking about COD.

I don't get being so passionate about something that you can get angry and start like a heated conversation with someone. get being so passionate about something that you can get angry and start like a heated conversation with someone like at some point i just start devaluing my opinion of your opinions right like like like and and i don't care if that's right or wrong it's what i'm gonna do so i can stay sane in a world where like you disagree so staunchly on something that seems like so common sense like we should all agree on this sort of thing i have to tell myself stuff like that because like I'll get on Twitter and I'll see like I only follow like a couple of people who follow me and then a bunch of hockey accounts. And I'll like see a hockey analytics guy say something that I really hate. And I have to like tell myself like, so so down, idiot. Like he's you know, there's no reason to get into a fight because this guy's analysis of this player that

you like shows him to be more negative than you think like chill chill out like i i definitely see that in myself i saw that earlier today i was waiting for a start the show and i had twitter open and i saw some nhl analyst saying something i thought was fucking retarded and i was about to like tweet like five things like this is another reason this analytics is wrong this is another reason this forward is better than you're giving him credit and i was just like no you know what don't don't even engage with that what are you mad about are you mad about hockey you fucking retard you're mad that some other guy who enjoys what you like a lot and you would have a huge amount in common if you were to sit down at a bar and talk, you're going to be mad at that guy?

What was his analytic that you disagreed with? He was saying something about, fuck, what player was it? I don't recall the specific player, but it was saying that the downsides of a forward, wasn't even a Blues player, but he was saying the downsides of a forward outweighed the benefit they brought with point getting, and I wanted to be like, are you fucking retarded? Clearly clearly not look at his power play points look at how look they even put

him on the penalty kill sometimes and like just realize no chill out retard there's no reason for this there's no reason for you to care that see i only do that when um so my youtube persona is like a professional fucking wrestling character so sometimes i'll get on twitter and i'm like yeah let's let's just fucking make a fool like let's make a fool this guy and i'll get into that mode where i'm not trying to be like argumentative i'm trying to be like you're stupid here's why look at this but it's like in character that's my excuse at least to rail on people life gets better i mean and you you can't speak for everyone but we are all individuals who spend a tremendous amount of time online for our jobs yeah and the more time you step back from that i think

the healthier mentally people are like it's not healthy to read all that stuff it's not healthy to read about yourself even it was it was sam hyde who like convinced me of that with a video a couple years ago where he was like, because he has a tremendous amount of negative and positive things being said about him online all the time, if you know who Sam Hyde is. Very funny comedian, jokester guy. And he was like, it's not about, his point was like, a lot of people talk, internet personalities, about how you don't want to read negative things about yourself all the time and that's very true very fair but he also had a point like you don't want to be reading positive things about yourself either like you don't want to be reading about yourself it's a

toxic you know loop that you're in and it creates narcissism in yourself like it's a net negative to read about yourself even if it were all overwhelmingly positive and that really resonated with me i was like he's 100 right that's interesting because i go after every pka i go to the pk subreddit and i read because i want to see if people liked what i did didn't like what i did you know it's mostly positive but you know sometimes people are like man blame truth's a fucking tweaker and i'm like dude i don't i don't i drink like that's it no i'm not i'm just i drink a lot of caffeine i'm down like three cokes it's just not worth in engaging in for mentally for a lot and that's stuck that's stuck because i'm bringing it up here i'm like i'm not a fucking tweaker like what are you talking about

it's funny like so taylor's right uh the subreddit is like 90-10 negative to positive on me, I think. Maybe I have that. Maybe it's 50-50. I don't know. But the negative stuff sticks a lot harder. There are times where I go through a wave where they're overwhelmingly positive on me. There'll be little stints like that. That'll fuck you up in a different way.

Suddenly, like he mentioned narcissists. Yeah. Suddenly, I think that everything I say is really important. Jackie, hush. I went with hush on purpose. I've got something to say. Yeah, yeah. Do you not realize how valued I am online?

The waitress is like, wow. And Jackie's like, he's an alpha talker. It's what he does and like but that stuff is like too much positive fucks up your brain and your sense of self-image and stuff and too much negative is even worse it's not good to read about yourself no i'm gonna not go to the subreddit yeah dude i don't go there at all now and we're like advertising it but uh it's gotten to the point where it's like I will vehemently defend my right not to know what it says. Like, oh, are you in my life telling me about it? No. I went on there and I was abused.

I was abused. Were you really abused? Yes, I was physically assaulted. By a Reddit commenter. Yeah, I went out on there after the first. My comments seemed to be a little, it was like half and half. Either people really liked me and they enjoyed me on the show or they were like, this guy right here, the worst person ever.

So yeah, it was really a rough spot. Half doesn't feel neutral, does it? Oh, yeah. I'm sorry. Half doesn't feel neutral. It feels like you're being bullied into the ground. I don't know, man. It's funny. When you read somebody

else's, you have the perspective that probably you should, right? If I read yours and it's 70 30 positive for example i'll be like oh generally positive view of you if you read yours and it's 70 30 positive it's like 30 negative is fucking rough everybody hates me how did a third of these people hate me what did i do i didn't do that's just not true i think on my last episode it was like man this guy is definitely a top one percent pk i guess he's got the energy and he's handsome and who had like a thousand upvotes and then the the second top comment was this guy's the biggest liar ever

kyle hates him and he should never breathe again what's going on it's so funny dude like like there are times like i'll be convinced i had a hilarious bit like in my head i'm like that was so funny people are gonna love that and i go to the youtube comments and i scroll down and it's like oh i guess it wasn't funny at all i guess nobody liked that one i I had another topic too. I would just before, you know, before anything closes up or anything, I was curious the whole YouTube boxing thing.

I just wanted to get you guys to take on. I know it's been talked about before, but I, I'm in talks right now. It looks like, I mean, I have the contract available. They're working on the guy that I'm fighting is much bigger.

So they're working on his side, but they got a thing coming up in March with this YouTube boxing. ksi's brother deji is going to be fighting on it uh i believe uh or phase temper just got announced to fight somebody so phase temper is uh one of the main guys that owns phase clan of course and then i believe that they're i don't know if this is um announced yet but i definitely saw rumors that vitality is fighting as well. And then I'm going to be fighting probably one of the FaZe guys, hopefully FaZe K. They also suggested that I fight Sensei again, FaZe Sensei.

And I was like, maybe an MMA and maybe not just boxing strictly. He's black belt boxing. I'm not black belt boxing. I'm white belt, two stripes boxing. So I guess I just kind of want to get your take. How do you feel about the whole YouTube boxing space?

Is it something that you want to get into, Taylor? Or what's going on? Are you saying participate in or watch? Participate in. Both. You know I'm pushing 50. You look great. I think you can come back and maybe take out.

You are bar none the fittest near 50-year- old that I've ever met in my life. Woody, Woody, Woody, fucking Mike Tyson just came back. Looked great. First of all, he didn't look like he used to. A little bit. He looked darn good. I know that Kyle's going to beat up

Diego Sanchez after he feels better. If Diego will ever sign the contract. I know. It's so crazy to me that he's scared to sign the contract. It's weird how scared Diego is. Yeah. It's hard to believe, actually. I'll say this about Diego. He talks a big game online, but whenever we get into a private conversation,

he is as soft as he can be. He's always... He's just like when Wings was trying to rig that 1v1. He's like, no, no, we do it this way and that way and i'm like no for real i hate you fuck you i'm gonna kick your ass is it not enough when he calls you sir he's yeah it's fucking embarrassing he calls me sensei i don't even he calls me he bowed and he didn't give me one of those shit bows he kissed my fucking toes he's disgusting he said josh he asked if j if Joshua could watch him give me head, his actual sensei. He's fucking weird, dude.

What a D-Gen. He's like, it's not gay. It's about respect. I'm like, no, no, no. A thousand times. No, I don't care if it's gay or respect or whatever. It's you. You're weird looking.

Like, I don't want you near me. Like, I'm going to beat you up. But like, that's not going to take long. So if he was a more handsome man, you'd say yes. Oh, just for the dominance. Yeah. Yeah. Dominate him.

Yeah. That's the biggest strike against him is he isn't even cute. No. Bear with me on this. Logan Paul versus Mike Tyson. Jake Paul versus Conor McGregor. Kyle versus Diego. Diego won't show up. He won't show up he's been on three different contracts

he keeps changing he wanted like goose down gloves at one point and and I don't even know if those exist he wanted them custom made or something he's always Kyle I've got an idea I'm gonna be your corner hype man yeah and if you start. And if you start to lose in any way, I start screaming the N-word as loud as I can. And now all attention is directed at the corner guy, and no one's going to see you lose. Kyle, I have a plan, too. Hear me out.

I am your other corner man. If you start to lose in any way, I go to Diego's corner. As the fight's happening, Woody's like sidestepping. Hey, pretty good. Take off my Kyle shirt. Diego's shirt under his. Let's read in the video too.

Diego can wear UFC-sized gloves. Kyle, sock and boppers. Sock and boppers. I haven't heard that in a long time. I offered to use one hand. And a sock and bopper? At this point, I'm going to have to hop on one foot, I guess. He's just a coward.

He's a fake, a fraud. I've heard that a lot of his fights were fixed. I heard that, too. It was from you, but I heard it. Yeah. That's where I heard it as well, and I trust that. I heard it from one of my close friends, and I treat that as gossip. It was a private conversation.

He had no reason to lie. Like, none. Guys, I live in Las Vegas, home of the UFC. If you guys see me next and I got a big old black eye, you know what happens. Hopefully you don't have a big black eye. Hopefully you're totally clean and you dominated. If you have a black eye after this,

it'll be because Diego tried to kiss you and head-butted you accidentally. You'll be fine. Dude, there does have to be a little bit of like uh of of ego you know saving for you like even if you lose a boxing match the only reason you didn't kill the guy you're boxing is because you decided not to use jujitsu you know what i mean like i don't know you lost the fight but if it was a suddenly like oh gun on everyone like it's a prison fight, fight to the death. You're like, oh, okay, I win.

Awesome. Perfect. Great. It does make me feel better. I can utilize my skills I've practiced for a decade. I don't know if you guys had seen it, but yeah, I fought the only pro fighter on the card, and halfway through I hit him with an outside trip and took him down for funsies. It was super obviously illegal. The whole crowd was very upset with me i saw that i saw that on your instagram i saw on your instagram uh actually posted where you're like mid-trip or whatever yeah oh yeah you just followed me yeah yeah uh like a couple months ago

yeah yeah i remember saying that i was like my boxing coach my boxing coach would bully the fuck out of me and uh like i remember i've said this before he'd hit me so hard like in the body and in the ribs and stuff and i'm like is this how hard you hit in like a real fight and he's like no this is how hard i hit in a real fight same hardness like so so yes like yes that's that's what you're doing and then yeah pretty much and you let me do it again huh i like you woody no one ever lets me beat him up like this and then like so he just beat like it was bullying it was bullying he's supposed to be coaching me what if he said that he's like usually people stop me by now but um he's a boxer and i was a grappler and at one point i hit him with a hip toss i'm like over at flow you know

like a guy can be say a blue belt overall but this like he spots back take opportunities like a brown belt and he does this like a white belt um a hip toss is one of the my moves that i'm good at and uh he's wide open for it and i flipped him up and his feet were way in the air and i placed him down like even gracefully and uh all the other boxers were like i like that one that was so illegal it's not grappling but i've done the same thing and i loved it it's crazy how uh somebody like you said even a blue belt is so much more advanced than the average person just like walking around on the street. It's absolutely insane to me. We have a lot of guys that train

with us like cops and military guys and stuff. And those guys that come in that are fresh, man, you give them a small white belt with three stripes and it's just over for them. That knowledge is like super separates the new guy from the guy who's a blue belt or whatever.

Dude, and some of those professions that you talked about, they're supposed to be tough guys like cops or whatever. And none of them, prison guards, knew what they're doing on day one with the exception of army guys. They don't know how to fight, but their cardio is for real. For sure. I have so much respect for the guys that come in and train the cops and stuff, you know, because they're not obligated to do that. And it's like crazy that it's crazy to me that more don't, you know, sorry for cutting you off.

Oh, no, no. Okay. I was just going to say like the, the whole boxing thing in front of people. I did box when I was younger. I had a trainer and everything. Kind of got out of it when I was like 15. I have a real...

I think I've talked about this earlier, but I have a really fucking good head. As in, I don't really get days. I don't get rocked. I never have. So that's good. I wasn't technically that great at it. But if I applied myself, could I be good at it?

I think so. but there's something. I'm so introverted that just being in front of a crowd or at a big event would probably psych me the fuck out, and I'd lose just based on that. You definitely get an adrenaline dump for sure. You get this crazy. I felt like I was moving in slow motion out there. Even when I've competed before in front of a lot of people in jiu-jitsu, it is a weird thing when everything – it feels like so much pressure and there's bright lights on you.

I got choked unconscious at a jiu-jitsu tournament. That was embarrassing. I was super embarrassed. I threw up bananas. Can I pause you right there? Yeah. So you've been choked unconscious. You were super embarrassed.

When you saw someone choked unconscious, I'm sure you've seen it, do you think much less of them or it's just the game no i think i think that they're cool i'm like right you're fine yeah like like i do stuff like that too like oh for me this is super embarrassing i think that this happened for you oh dude i totally understand this is just the game i got choked unconscious a couple weeks ago actually um and in the most embarrassing way my trainer was we were doing chokes all week and so like demonstrating yeah and i'm like the high belt there's like 40 people there and he's like just holding a choke and he just starts kind of monologuing a little bit but it was fine it

was very light and i was like uh just uh a bow and arrow okay so So he was on my back and he was just very lightly holding it, but we had been doing chokes for like five days straight. And you know, after you get choked a little bit, they come on quicker. And so I was just hanging out there and I should have turned my head, but I was like, Oh,

I'm totally fine. Then he tells a whole story. And then I wake up in my hands like this. And I'm like, I'm like, like I was just having a little, like a baby seizure, you know,

there's no, there's no, there's no shame in that. I'm so embarrassed, man. Everybody's like staring at me. My friend, a little baby seizure. There's no shame in that. Jesus Christ. I'm so embarrassed, man. Everybody's staring at me in my brain. He gave you a seizure? He gave me one.

We called it the chicken dance in my gym. It's the worst if you're on asphalt and you can't control it, but you're grinding your face into the asphalt. Oh, gosh. Yeah. See, the thing about the crowds is an embarrassment for me. can't control but you're grinding your face into the asphalt oh god yeah i did that the see the thing about the the crowds is an embarrassment for me like uh to to go to this concert that got rescheduled you know for a few months away i have to psych myself it's just being around people that

many fucking people really have you ever been on the stage um i think when i was young like really young doing plays and stuff but uh it's weird because because I can get on and I can talk to hundreds of thousands of people as long as you're not around me. But get me in a room with like 20 people. I went to it. It's easier to talk to people in a small group like that because like you can read immediately how you're being perceived. And so you can change it real time. It's not even that. It's just the fact of being around people,

that many people. I went to, it was a beer and burger festival. Fucking hated it. I was just... Really? You hated a burger and beer festival? I did not feel comfortable. I was like, guys,

I was there with my friends. I'm like, guys, I'm going to take a walk. So it's sort of like a crowded hallway and you're not happy there. I don't like crowds. I don't like airports. Have you always been like that? Yeah.

Yeah, I'd say so. I'd say the last couple of years of all this craziness, I definitely would consider myself kind of the social butterfly of most of my friend groups. And even going through all this, I feel like I was getting social anxiety when we would go out again and stuff just because the amount of people. And I guess it's kind of like a perishable skill like if you don't work

out you get fat if you don't talk all the time you're talking skills get a little bit crappy yeah you know very true very true yeah and i tend to avoid it as much as i can so i need to work on that but uh yeah i really don't i don't mind public speaking that's always been something that doesn't really bother me because I'm always like one of my even when I was given like presentations in college and it was like everyone else in the group didn't want to do the present

presentation part. It was like, oh, fuck it. Like what? You want me to present in front of a bunch of people who aren't paying attention anyway? I don't give a shit. Yeah, like I was always students judging me who cares i had a lot of fun like when we could do and that's probably why i got into youtube i always thought that i would maybe be like a radio dj or something i thought that would be fun but i

was always the kid too that would present the project or like if there was a chance for me to go to the front of the class and like talk about whatever i'm like yes i want to do that oh yeah i was always the first to volunteer for any sort of like talking in front of the class because that's the smart way to do it. Like you're judged. If you're the first person to present anything, high school, college, regardless, you're going to be judged less critically than by the end. Because believe it or not, you know, teachers are human, too, and they're paying a lot more attention and more willing to give you the benefit of the doubt early on. Whereas if you're the thirty ninth of forty one presentations, they're out of it. They don't care. They're not paying attention.

They're not they're like probably psychologically turned off and angry at the fact they have to watch all that shit. And so that'll probably translate a bit to your final grade my comfort level with presentations is directly tied into my preparation level if i'm a subject matter expert i can get up there and talk and i'm pretty comfortable with it i'm happy to take your questions if my knowledge is thin if it's skin deep and i'm really just hoping to get out of there undiscovered, you know, I would like to get unscathed. Very true.

There's a big difference there. There's an impractical jokers where it's something very much like that. Like they have him pose as like an, an expert in quantum physics or something on a panel. Yes. That's hilarious. And, and,

and like they're, and they're asking him these questions and he's just trying to like well you know the thing about that is i could take it or leave it frankly you know they're asking him shit like what do you think about the new study out of harvard showing the neutrino field is actually a bit thicker and more robust than we thought before and the implications on that and he's like yeah the thing about that don't get me started on neutrinos i'll go all day he's just got a bullshit his way through it and they're like no but could you specifically if you had to because you do choose one you know i'm so glad you're watching a bunch of impractical jokers now that is such

a funny show i i'm really enjoying it um i find i noticed that the things they usually fail on is when they have to say something mean to a stranger that's what they have a hard time with um the awkwardness they usually pull out but i remember like there was a woman a black woman came into a check a checkout line and she had this ridiculous wig on that made her look like James Brown and they were and they were gonna they told him to say oh wow it's the godfather of soul and he was just like hello ma'am how are you tonight that's what's so good about it like that's why their prank show succeeded where a bunch of others failed is because they make themselves the butt of the joke yeah and and the thing that makes them the most uncomfortable is like

what insulting a random person like they'll make themselves the ass the butt of the joke all day but the second you ask them to like make another person the butt of the joke they all get very uncomfortable they don't yeah they don't like doing it i i saw one where they're they're driving a a a taxi or something and this black lady is in the back seat and she's telling a story and they're like roll down both of her windows mid-conversation as they're driving down the road he does it he doesn't really think much of it he goes now say i thought i saw i thought i heard you crack a rat back there so i rolled them down and he's just like but i uh thought i heard you crack a rat back there. So I rolled him down and he's just like, but I,

uh, I heard you crack. I heard you crack a rat back there. It's so painful for him to get out. Like, like it's the, the, the,

one of the most uncomfortable punishments I've ever seen on that show is when Q the, the heavier guy, one of the heavier guys. They're all fat. His punishment is he has to teach an art class to a bunch of children. And the kids are painting their little art,

their children. And his punishment is he thought it was going to have to be to teach the art class. And then they're like, you can't leave until you paint a red x on every single kid's painting in that room and so these kids are like working on cats they're like six years old and he has to like paint over it the big red x so what it was they said okay look at this little girl's painting of the flower he's like yeah it's pretty good tell her it's great

but not but not but not good enough and then x exit out and he's like no i can't do it like all right that means you fail this episode your punishment a red x on every child's photo fuck he like gets like one 12 year old who's like seen him do the red x to five other people and she's like don't don't you paint a red X on mine. Don't paint a red X on my photo. And he's dipping it in like, it's so uncomfortable. But that is a light punishment compared to the tattoos.

Compared to the tattoos, true. But it's so uncomfortable. All the mothers are there. The tattoos, the piercings, they made the one Italian guy get those diamond studs in his ears. That was pretty nuts. Yeah, it's a good show. I've enjoyed it a lot.

It's on HBO if anybody wants to watch it. You can popcorn through three episodes so fast. It's a good show. It's very funny. One of the bits they did, they had these running gags sometimes that are really good. Essentially, they did this thing where one of them climbed on a statue in New York. And I guess it's a federal statue. And it's like minor league trouble, right?

Like a little fine or something. But instead they told him that he had to go to some proceedings. And so he goes there and meets with an actress posing as a government official at a courthouse in New York. And she is super bitchy. She's like, we're escalating this. You knew you were trespassing. You just said it on camera to me,

sir. You just told me to my face. You knew you were trespassing. Yeah. And so, and then like, then they go one week later, it's still a bit still going.

And, and they show up and like pull their permits, not just for what they're doing that day, but for the entire city of New York, which would pretty much fuck their show they're like that woman is pulling our permits citywide all of us anything and they're just melting down and then they turn around and there she is like laughing her ass off at him it's they go really in depth with their it is it is so fucking funny i love impractical jokers i i was gonna ask you kyle but i guess anyone you guys know who i dubs is the youtube personality he like makes uh he like makes

funny videos but also like funny documentaries on interesting individuals and he and his team were going to make a documentary on sam hyde. Do you know who Sam Hyde is? Yeah, he was the creator of Million Dollar Extreme. Very funny guy, very edgy guy. And iDubbbz was going to have, was coming to where Sam is with his setup and everything and was going to make a documentary about how he fell off. And it was going to apparently be kind of a sandbag

you know a sandbagging kind of thing except sam hyde had his own team of documentarians there when i dubs arrived and he filled filmed a concurrent documentary as i dubs was trying to do it and then released it way before iDubbbz could. There's a million views on Sam Hyde's channel. It's called The Truth About iDubbbz and it's not even a roasting or anything of iDubbbz, but it is Sam Hyde

absolutely alpha-ing iDubbbz. Sam Hyde, if you don't know, he's 6'7". He's a huge guy who lifts and boxes. He's a nasty beast, he's six foot seven. And he's a huge guy who lives in boxes. He's a nasty beast. He's a nasty beast. 100% nasty beast.

And so Idubbb shows up to film this documentary. And Sam Hyde and his team had invented huge numbers of ways to fuck with him and make it seem like his situation was way worse than it was. He was like, number one, tons of alcohol alcohol everyone's got to be drunk all the time we're gonna buy a bunch of pokemon cards and keep trying to explain pokemon cards to him as though it's like a new nft style thing and yeah we're gonna have a bunch of dead wasps on the table for no reason. No one's going to address it. There's going to be a huge amount of dead wasps everywhere. He said he was going to start a rap song and he was going to rap freestyle and the hook would be swag like Idub's. Just like keep making him more uncomfortable.

The first thing when Idub shows up to like film this sandbag documentary sam hyde goes we're just gonna do something we do all the time come on come with us he takes i dubs under a graffitied dirty bridge 15 minutes after he gets there and forces him to box with sam hyde who's six foot seven and huge and they're just like fighting under a bridge a little bit. Sam's not going full force or anything, but it is so fucking funny that I dubs a guy who like usually makes the video being the aloof. Look at this idiot guy being the uncomfortable,

terrified guy because you see Sam Hyde in full boxing gear. He's got that girdle on and he's got the the things on and he's like trying to teach i-dubs how to box but he's like mogging him like being so much bigger i have to watch this he he has he has i-dubs hold like the the kicking thing and sam is unloading powerful kicks into him under a bridge with graffiti everywhere. And he plays it off like, yeah, this is our favorite bridge. We love playing down here.

He humiliates him. It is so fucking funny. There's no way iDubbbz is going to release that documentary because other things. They had a whole document that's on Twitter on a viral thread of all the things they thought of to fuck with idubs they wanted to they put fake shit on the bathroom floor uh he said one of us has to be brandishing a gun just in case i gotta hot someone

all the time he hired a fake bodyguard to stand by the door at all times if idubs hadbs had to go to the bathroom, he'd be like, escort him to the bathroom. And he would escort him there and be like, everything's clear. He could always be talking about Tinder girls coming to the office, but they never show up. Sam Highs made a bunch of old videos videos one of the first things he made them do he has like an office with all these workers and people and he was like this is just something we do every day we watch all my classics and so he made him sit down and watch all of his classic videos in a row it is it is so fucking It is watching a troll get the fuck trolled out of them and not know how to

handle it. It is so goddamn fun. I love Sam Hyde. I've been a huge fan of his forever. How long is the video? It's an hour and 50 minute documentary. What? Two hours? Like almost two hours of him. And he just takes him to a field at the end and they just shoot guns.

Like it's just... I'm about to watch this right after this one. It sounds like an Eric Andre skit He just takes him to a field at the end and they just shoot guns. I'm about to watch this right after this. It sounds like an Eric Andre skit or something, like a big extended Eric Andre thing. It pretty much is. I'll link you guys the document of all the stuff they were doing. Litter the floor of the office with nuts and bolts and random nonsense.

So there's just a bunch of ball bearings and nuts and bolts all over the floor for no reason. They're all drinking 40s, getting trashed. Everyone refers to Sam as their Obi-Wan. All right. I have enjoyed this thoroughly. that a wrap yeah i got a couple things i wanted to say before i head out guys if you don't mind uh i appreciate you guys for having me on hopefully i'll be on again within the next five years that would be absolutely beautiful i haven't missed an episode since 27 man mw3 2027 i'll be ready. And I want to, I want to say thank you guys.

I appreciate the show. And, uh, beautiful. It's the highlight of my week. I watch it all the time. I canceled dinner meetings. I didn't go to jujitsu.

I'm here and I'll do it again next week. Just let me know whenever. Sounds good. Thank you, man. Of course. Thank you guys. Thank you for coming on,

man. Of course. And Blanche was like, don't call me. I'll call you. Also, if everybody could go follow the PKA TikTok, TikTok.com slash PKA, it's going to be made, right?

For maybe highlights. Oh, it's going to be taken now. Don't follow that, it's not us. Don't follow that, it's not us. Make it before this goes live. Let's go. We're PKA TV real, because that's what was left. Three, six, seven, four. This was live. Let's go. We're PKA TV real because that's what was left. 3674.

All right. All right. PKA 578.