Painkiller Already - PKA 609 W/ Count Dankula: Hyenas Vs Dogs, Taylor Becomes A Pastor, Girl Bullies

Episode Date: August 19, 2022

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pka 609 with our guest count and dankula taylor this episode of pka brought to you by blue chew wonky weeds death by gummy bears and of course lock and load the finest volume increasing formula for your semen pleasure increasing check it out link below dank thank you so much for joining us you've been highly requested for a long time i appreciate that i've heard i've heard a few times uh some people have said to me as well that i've been spoken about a few times on here and the reason that i didn't get invited is because some of you thought i was really a nazi and all that so yeah that was that was fun but not as good it's good to be here i've seen enough clips anyway love love love cows prison stories and stuff like that yeah that was that was

good yeah yeah i don't think any of us thought you were nazi if if you were a nazi you'd be the least efficacious one in history like converting one pug at a time there's been a few dogs now i get i still get the occasional video and i've had dozens of them in the past day people going oh look what i taught my dog to do and i'm like oh okay cool that's great man they don't want to join the fucking wolf reich a lot of people don't know i'm sure of our listeners your whole whole story but it started a few years ago where you trained your pug to do the hitler salute as a joke can you walk us i imagine there's hours you can go into but can you give us a version of that i'll try and give like this short postage stamp version but it's like uh my girlfriend that was my girlfriend's pug she's my wife now but my girlfriend at the

time was always going on about how cute he was take as much time as you need sorry to interject if you want to lay out as much as you want it's a long show and it's a funny story i know that's cool then well basically she would even like shove the pug in my face going look at his little face look how cute he is and i'm like fuck off like the fucking dog and other than one day i was like giving him a treat and he lifted his paw because he gives you a paw whenever he does it and i went haha that kind of looks like a little salute and then a light bulb appeared above my head and i just thought do you know do you know be really fucking funny yeah the little cute lovely the little cute lovely animal and then six million you know that's hilarious that'll upset heart to no end but the problem is is a

he didn't do it all the time he wasn't fully properly trained there was sometimes he did it sometimes he didn't do it and i didn't want to take the dog in front of my girlfriend and then try and get him to it and he doesn't do it and it's like days of work just completely ruined right so i decided to film all the times he actually did do it and then i made it into a video uploaded it on youtube with like no intention of it going anywhere i even gave it like a stupid title i only had eight subscribers they're all friends of mine they're all people i knew so i thought there's no chance anyone's gonna find this but then uh ended up with the plan was me and my girlfriend would like have little youtube

nights we would put youtube on the TV in the living room, and then we would watch videos. And I was going to totally blindside her by going, oh, I know this really funny video. Just you sit there. I'll put it on, and then I was going to get my phone out and film a reaction. But before we even got a chance to do that,

I went to a fan fest in Iceland, which is like EVE Online, the online space spreadsheets game I was very very into that game back then so I went to Iceland and while I was on the plane going to Iceland someone found the video somehow, still don't know how

and then they posted it to Reddit and it made it to the front page of Reddit I didn't know, so I've landed in a foreign country, so my phone has not got signal. I'm not getting texts or anything, no notifications. I'm going around Reykjavik. I'm meeting up with my friends over there.

We went to the pub. I got absolutely drunk like that, and then I stumbled back to my hotel room, not realizing that back home, my fucking life has been burned down. I'm running around trying to speak Icelandic and shit, man. Not realizing that hundreds of reporters are calling my grandmother and shit. While I'm running around going,

howdy, howdy, howdy, running around fucking Iceland. But then I get back to the hotel room room i pass out for a few hours i wake up feeling like shit i've like go to check my phone and i'm like oh fuck i'll wait the hotel wi-fi connected to the hotel wi-fi and my phone just blew the fuck up man it's like you have like shit tons of youtube messages you have 38 voicemails and like and then like while i was just scrolling through them i only scrolled through them for like 10 seconds and then my girlfriend called me and i says what the fuck's going on what's happened and then she said why are there reporters at the door and i just went i don't fucking know

is it the video and then yeah i found out that the video went viral and oh no this poor dog ruined your life yeah yeah fuck him man he get nothing i hope you just beat the shit out of him every day after this i do i do it's hard not to there's a reason his face looks like that you know but ended up like uh i just had fun in iceland i just thought ah fuck it you know it's done now uh while i was actually uh helmar veigar was like the ceo of like well he was he stepped down but he was the ceo of ccp games and it was in the middle he has like keynote speech the big speech for EVE Online Fan Fest and I

basically get an email from my job going yeah you're fucking fired so he's giving his big speech and I'm turning around to all my friends going I just got fired and I'm letting them all read the email kept partying

in Iceland and they're all making jokes going, they're going to arrest you when you go back home. And I'm like, ha ha, no, they won't. Because it was one of those, if only you knew how bad things really were. But I ended up, came home, got off the plane, came home to reporters hanging around outside my house. They're taking pictures of me and trying to talk to me as I'm going into the

house. I then ended up speaking to the local youths, shall we say, and told them if they see any journalists in the street to ask them very nicely to leave. Do you hire thugs

to run off the port reporters? No, I don't hire them. It's just, no. Oh, no, they work for free. Yes, yes, they do. In Scotland, each area, you know, each housing estate or project or whatever you want to call it in America has its own street gang known as the young team, right? And basically, they have this whole thing where they don't like you

if you're not from there. So I'm like they're not from here ask them ask them nicely to leave and so for a few days there was there was no reporters no journalists no nothing right but then ended up uh we get a knock at the door and i've just had three bongs when we get a knock at the door and I've, I've just had three bongs when we get this knock at the door and then I open it and it's the CID like a criminal investigation. And those were the two people that came to the door. That's me being arrested. I look like a fucking hobo, man.

And that was the thing that was in the papers. It's like, like no one even knows the crime, but everyone's looking at that picture just going, he deserves it. You deserve it. You look like that's the first time you've seen light in your head.

You look like a newborn kitten. I was recently unemployed. They're taking you out of a prisoner of war camp. What had you been up to in the weeks prior to this? Because you look good today. Nothing. I got fired. I got fired.

I was sitting in the house smoking weed and doing nothing. All right. I can get on board with that. Yeah. Hence the unkempt beard and fucking just shit hair and everything. And also I'm high as fuck. That's why my eyes look like tight vaginas it's quite bad but ended up like there was no reporters in the street but the reason but as you can see from that picture suddenly there was reporters in the

street yeah and uh my neighbors told me that they arrived with the cops yeah of course they came they came like with the police they knew about your gang yeah yeah that was it that was it but the but the thing is whenever the police communicate with the press they're not allowed to tell the press shit like that oh this is the date and time we're going to have yeah someone slipped 100 bucks yeah no well yeah what happened was basically the cops broke the law they're supposed to have a record of every communication they make with journalists there's no records like my lawyer tried to get it and they were like, no such thing exists. And it's like, oh well,

guess the journalists are fucking psychic then. I got arrested because of the nature of the crime. It was a hate crime. Sometimes you get taken down to the station, they book you and go, alright, fuck off. You'll get your

court date in the mail. But I got kept in because mine was classed as a very serious offense so i'm sitting and sitting in cell and i'm just all right okay i guess i'm having a fucking sleepover and in jail tonight and then like in the middle of the night i can hear just screaming coming down the hall just screaming right and then i look out through the little porthole and basically the cops have got this guy in like the superman carry you know how they've got him in a full body harness and they're just carrying him like a big plank of wood down the hall they throw him in the room and i can hear them like kneeling on his back to undo the restraints and then they just back out the room and slam the door and this guy's screaming the fucking place down punching walls kicking the

door this is like three four in the morning when I'm trying to sleep. I'm sitting, punching the wall and shouting back, going, shut the fuck up! Shut the fuck up! Screaming at him. He's shouting shit out, going, I've ruined my life! I've ruined my life! And everything. I know.

Me too! Let's sleep on it! That was interesting. The next morning morning we're getting taken out to go to the courthouse and we're all getting shackled up and everything to get loaded onto the vans. And the porter who's the guy that looks after the prisoners, he was

very nice. He was a nice guy. And I said to him, going, who was that absolute roaster that you put into the cell next to me last night, man? He kept me awake all night. And the guy just goes, oh yeah man he kept me awake all night and the guy just goes oh yeah he murdered his friend oh what did he do to his friend murdered his friend yeah killed him and and i was like okay i understand why he's upset you know but yeah all right well he did ruin his own life but what about his friend's life just

pretty much over well he's a murderer more More or less. Never mind that. What about my sleep? Fuck them. I can't sleep. The friend's gone. You're never getting that sleep back, though. Exactly. What was the job that fired you instantly upon learning

that you'd taught your dog a salute? it was two one wasn't really a firing like one of them was just a call center like it was like repairing say the little pdas used whenever you make a card transaction it was like repairing them so you had people calling you that couldn't speak english and you were having to guide them through a complicated process of like how to reset their pin machine and everything. So that was a fucking nightmare. And the other one was security, and that wasn't so much a firing.

I just never got shifts. I think they just kind of went, ah, if we ignore them, we'll go away. And everyone was kind of like, but I work for you. Yeah, you do. You think so, huh? I think I said, am I not getting any shifts this week and i never got a

text back and i was kind of like and it's not like a security boss to turn down someone that wants to do shifts so i kind of i kind of just went all right okay that's that then but like uh ended up as i was getting like taken out the cell i'm getting handcuffed up another one as i'm getting loaded into the van the van's got like lots of little pods in it for like each prisoner as I'm getting loaded into the van, the van's got lots of little pods in it for each prisoner, as I'm walking by one of the windows, I see a friend of mine like that, but he's one of these friends where you only get to ever hang out with him for about

two or three months at a time because then he's back in for like a while so ended up, I was like, oh fuck, how you doing? I fancy meeting you here like and we were sitting there we're like shouting through the little boxes at each other like to try and talk to each other and he sort of says allegedly i i opened someone's face up with a

meat cleaver he basically slashed someone down the face which is a very common thing in scotland extremely common yeah it's nice it's got a chimp that's why it's here that scottish actor and like he slashed someone down the face, which is a very common thing in Scotland. Extremely common. It's called a chib. That Scottish actor in Sons of Anarchy. He had a Glasgow smile. That was his name. That's what they call him. They call him Chibs. Chibs, because he had two chibs. Thank you so much for that.

What does chibs mean? Chibs are slashed to slash someone's face. Yeah. And what he got was called the Glasgow grin because they cut a smile into his face. I didn't like that. Does he have it for real? Yeah, it's real.

Well, the guy who did it, I didn't realize it was real when I watched that show or saw him in other things. And I'm like, God, I wish they would make that symmetrical. Like, because one of them is lower. It's kind of a Glasgow smgow smirk well it's because it's because he was struggling because they were cutting his face up it's not like the it was being mugged for dj equipment that was why they were trying to steal his dj equipment

from oh man say what you're not gonna hold still man you want it even yeah it makes him look very hardcore yeah does it though yeah he's got a that's clearly not like something he was born with like a hair lip that's that's a violent chop or a slice well there's two whenever you see someone with a slash on their face like in scotland like some people go oh you look you look really tough but people in the know go, you're not trustworthy. You did something. You did something really bad. You know what he'd do, this guy we just looked at.

It seems like he was being mugged. Yeah, he was being mugged. He's falsely accused of being untrustworthy. That's true. Nine times out of ten, if someone has a slash, it's because they stole drugs or they snitched on someone or something like that it's basically like a big punishment it's them marking you basically saying

like untrustworthy it's a scarlet letter on your face that essentially is what it is well it's just wrong to give that to people who are trustworthy i know it's just it's just a thing in glasgow's been a thing in glasgow for over a thing in Glasgow for over 100 years. The tradition. It started with the cutthroat razors they used to carry around in the 1800s and everything that started with that. This is blowing me away, and I'm from the land of gunshots. Oh, no. There's a famous picture on Socky Hall Street in Glasgow

of the razor gangs, as they're called. There was loads of different ones that you get all the way throughout Glasgow, and the razor was the weapon of choice because they're called. There was loads of different ones that you get all the way throughout Glasgow, and the Razor was the weapon of choice, because they're easy to hide from the police, and you can hide them in the brim of your cap and all that type of stuff. They blew up around the 60s, 70s, and there's a very

famous picture on Sockie Hall Street in Glasgow of a member of a Razor Gang walking up and trying to slash a police inspector. In broad daylight, the police said, is hold on i need to find this picture the police inspector looks so hardcore he's got like a cigarillo there it is there that's the exact picture he's still got his smoke hanging out his mouth with fucking and then there's other pictures of him just taking the guy to the ground and everything as well yeah that was that was the

orange walk it's a what is a police inspector it sounds like a management position is he like he's like a detective okay yeah he's like a detective yeah so you're in prison you found out your new neighbor is a murderer what happens next well i get taken to court uh the next day and then that's when you just get put in like the big communal room with like all the other prisoners and then that's when you just get put in the big communal room with all the other prisoners and stuff like that. When we're sitting there chatting it ends up getting on to the

what you in for? I knew it was coming and I'm like, alright, here we go. Here we go. One guy got caught with 200 valium pills. One guy got caught growing weed in his house one guy was just like violated his parole conditions blah blah blah but then uh it gets

to my friend who goes allegedly i opened someone's face with a meat cleaver and then it gets to me and i just start laughing and i'm like, well, I made a meme of my girlfriend's pug Nazi saluting for a joke and three of the guys in there went, that was you! I thought I knew your face! That was me. But then my friend

leans over and whispers to me going, see when you go in, don't tell people that, because you will get battered. Yeah, see, because it's not violent and it's something dumb that I'm in for. People would just kick the shit out of me. That sucks. It's not because they're

anti-Nazi. It's because they're anti- pussy crimes. Oh, no, I can assure you that some some certain parts of scottish prisons are very pro-nazi yeah seems to be a common prison thing yeah it is everywhere but there was a guy like sitting on the floor and he looked about like 18 19 or something like that and like he's sitting sort of curled up this is obviously a whole new experience for him i've been arrested before, like a bunch of times.

It's always just been for fighting. I was outside the bar. I said something or someone said something. We threw punches. The police came like basic stuff, nothing bad, you know, like split head,

bust nose, bust lip, like basic shit like that. Those are the ones where you don't even get charged. They just keep you until you sober up. And then the next morning open the doors and go right fuck off. Because in Scotland there

is not enough time on earth to prosecute all of the fights. The drunken fights. The drunken fights, yeah. There's not enough time. Is there any other kind? The police are leaving pressure.

Both guys are like, don't press charges, don't press charges. The other guy's not pressing charges. They're leaving Lally and saying, the other guy's not pressing charges. Cool people don't press charges. What's your plan? They just want you to leave. They just want you to get out. But this guy was sitting there, and he turned around and says see see if it's your first defense like what what happens and

then all these other like you know seasoned criminals were going if it's your first offense you'll get admonished admonished basically means the judge just chews you the fuck out and he might give you a warning basically saying if you appear in front of me again blah blah blah and all that but then no charges no nothing it still gets marked on your little record but you don't have a criminal record and then that's when that's when someone went oh well depends what did you do and then he turns around and says i got caught with a kilo of cocaine and fucking the whole room just erupted in laughter and i felt so bad because even i was doing it the whole room was looking at this kid going no you're fucked you're absolutely

you're getting at least five at least five and you just saw the color just drain from his face he was cross-legged on the floor just staring at the ground and then everyone sort of realised that we've just told this guy his life's over or some shit and then people start going maybe not if you've got a good lawyer you never know though, white guys

maybe a media judge a drunk barrister who knows I never checked up on him i never got his name but yeah he for a kilo of cocaine yeah he got time oh yeah of course dude that was so scary because like we've all watched television we've all watched movies and that's as close as 99.9 percent of us ever come to the real deal legal system and maybe you see some like medieval movie where they're like all right well off with his head easy You're like, ha, we're a lot more careful these days with people's

lives and even the times of their lives. We consider that before we just, oh, wait, no, 30 years. You're like, wait, what? Mr. Myers, you're next. Wait, what? Like when I watched him specifically, I've told the story a bunch of times, but when I watched that judge put that drug trafficker away for like a quarter century or more, whatever it was, I was like, Oh my God,

this is the real courtroom. You know, all the courtrooms I've ever been in up until today were like, there were some traffic charges present. No one in the courtroom with me there today was thinking about what they were going to do that afternoon. Everybody there was laser focused on the proceedings. You go to traffic court, there's people fucking around back there.

They're not dressed appropriately. They're being silly. The judge might even have to, hey, calm it down. Dude, it was a fucking funeral in there. Everybody was so afraid that you might like be the one that that judge like are you disrupting my courtroom who are you here to see anyway no no tell him it's the mexican dad here that mexican fella it's fucking scary it's not that it's not that at all

i mean so what was the fallout after that you know at that point after they released you were were you under the impression that it was gonna fade away no i just i got released but one of the things that was funny is i didn't have a lawyer at this point because i did have a lawyer years ago when i was younger and fighting all the time but he was like in his 90s so i didn't even i didn't even try and look him up i just thought he's dead he's he's fucking dead but i got they went okay well you've got a like state appointed lawyer and i went in and i sat down to the in front of the glass right and i shit you not he did this to me because one of the funniest things that is fucking pranked during this whole trial i sat across from him and he just done he was writing and he just done that like put his finger up so that he could keep writing your camera head stuck what did he do

he done like that as if okay and just kept writing so i just sat there in silence for about like 20 30 seconds while he finished his notes and then he slowly looks up at me and goes shalom and i actually jumped in frozen went oh my god and he went i'm not jewish and i was kind of like, well, you know, lawyer, you know. But I ended up, I spoke to him and we exchanged contact details. I get sent back to the cell and there's this word, I forget what it is, but basically the judge will look through his itinerary for the day.

And if there's anything that's dumb on it, the judge will just say, release them and just give them their date. Just let them out of the cell and give them their date because the judge wants to be away for five, you know, golf and all that. So it ends up the guy just comes in and says, I forget the phrase, but he just went, something granted. He went, off you go. And then I was like, oh, well, bye, guys.

To guys that are about to get like 15, 20. And I'm like, bye-bye like that's what i left and then it ended up i could give him a court date and the trial ended up lasting for about two years that it was about eight or nine dates during like the whole trial uh that's me waving outside waving can i give you a tip here low wave down here yeah i know yeah i know kyle's advice this is wrong you're looking for something yeah thank god your fingers are apart in that photo get that wrist active the nazis very stoic wrists you gotta work stuff like that i know the newspapers were very

happy when i did that because i was like no i was waving i was waving and everyone but there was footage of me like doing that with my hand as i came out and everything but my wife thought i'd done a nazi salute for a joke and all that but uh ended up ended up what happened it was like eight nine times i was in court and i was in there for two two years two year trial so twice as long as nuremberg every every time i ended up obviously after i got arrested i got a big boost in subs and people started watching my channel and stuff like that and uh while i'm going to court every time i went to court um i would be back in

the papers again my family would be getting harassed you know they would be turning up at my door all manners and stuff and everything and I had nothing I could not get jobs could not get a job anywhere like even in security and stuff like that like I would go to a place and in the interview they would go hey aren't you that yeah then i wouldn't get hired in some places i tried to be honest with them and went yeah just so you know you know there may be a little bit of press interest you know some some media concern about me working here in your pawn shop and then they were kind of like oh you're that guy nah fuck that like no actually i got some old uniforms you might want to take a look at before you leave some some places some fucking places was a like i just lied i just went

oh yeah i'm i'm this guy and would like a job and i got recognized by a customer on my first fucking day and then like the manager got called in because some little rat bitch in the staff told on me. The manager came in and, yeah, I was fired on my first day. Never got paid. Let me ask you this. These are all the bad things. These are people who think you are a Nazi, I guess, and they're like, oh, we're not going to have him.

We're not going to have him here. We're not going to even let him work somewhere. Did you have any actual Nazis who were like, hey, man, I got a job for you. Come on over here to the golf course. Nothing like that? Never had anything like that. Shit!

That's how you know they're completely out of power over there. Because if there were still some Nazis pulling some strings, they'd have been like, ah, get that dangula guy over here. Let's put him in charge of something. Oh yeah. Dude, take this as a, for the young professionals out there, there's nothing that kills your career like being an open Nazi. If you're on the fence, say no.

You can't get jobs anywhere, you know, apart from, you know, the Ukrainian military. Oh, we weren't there. They're not choosy about who they hire. They'll take anyone. They don't care what you've trained. You could teach a cat to goose step. They'll take you.

I'm just saying, everyone's raging that they're using Nazi battalions and stuff like that, but who better to fight against an invading force that wants to take over your country? I'm just saying, it's a lot of similar talking points. Yeah, but also the Nazis have a bad track record against shit tons of Russians, right?

That's true. That is true. Winter is approaching. It's going to... The answer is Afghanistan. You want Afghanis because they're better at shit tons of Russians invading them. That's true. Not in the snow. You've got to give them is Afghanistan. You want Afghanis because they're better at shit tons of Russians invading them. That's true. Not in the snow. You gotta get up to Afghanistan.

Yeah, not in the snow. I think if you put those Afghanis in the Donbass region or whatever it is, the Donbass region or whatever, they wouldn't fare so well. No, because they're not from there. They were good in Afghanistan because they knew all the fucking caves. I don't know.

That's my imagination, right? And that's what i guess everybody teaches but i i picture a scenario where like i don't know they know the cave system like like the the little valleys between remember when leonidas had that like oh yeah only that goat herder and the guy that's pissed off knows the secret way around us yeah i think there's probably a lot of that right like oh yeah we know the secret pass around that our goats travel like but the u.s military doesn't so we just go through there when we want to like move osama here and there do whatever we want like i'm sure that was a that was a huge huge huge waste of money how much was that one they always talk about how iraq was a trillion right what was afghanistan i know i think it was close to two two or three trillion afghanistan was yeah af. Afghanistan was the big one.

They could have put us on Mars in houses that like normal, like big earth houses for three trillion. They would have went so far down the list of people they could afford to send to Mars. We would be going. We could say yes or no.

You know what? Let's pass it to someone elderly. I'll take my ticket next year. Let Nana go to Mars. We can do it anytime. $2.3 trillion. That would be amazing if we put that into something useful. Not even something useful, Woody.

Anything other than what we put it into. We could have built roads we don't need. Let's cross them everywhere. Like it's Civ 5. Like Woody playing Civilization. Now we can pass around. Those schools aren't going to drone strike themselves, man.

Pay your taxes. It's so... I mean, I know it snows there, but it's a different region, right? It's a different geography. It's not mountains and valleys. It doesn't look that cold there. It's forests and fields. Yeah, the cold's not the problem, I don't think. I think it might be the terrain. Oh, it's not mountains and valleys. It doesn't look that cold there. It's forest and fields.

The cold's not the problem, I don't think. I think it might be the terrain. The difference between Afghanistan and Ukraine. I'm just saying the terrain is night and day. I'm just saying Ukraine might get Siberia cold. It's different to deal with 28

versus negative 28. I bet they both get cold enough to kill people. I think if you're wet, you know, if you're a soldier and your boots are wet, shit, it's a 40 degree night. It's going to be dreadful,

right? Like you don't have a way to warm yourself up. You're going to die on a 40 degree night. You're gonna have to be like stepping in place so that nothing bad happens to you. Before you wake. Sounds awful. Problem when you're in a war zone, because starting fires is as dangerous as gunfire.

Like, Oh, dude, the Ukraine, we've given the ukrainians some cool stuff or they just came up with some money to buy some cool stuff because i keep seeing them with thermal optics and and at first i thought those uh drones that drop the mortar shells were jerry rigged but they have like a 3d printed system now they hook us a a a mortar shell onto a drone and then they just fly it over these Russians and pinpoint accuracy in sunroofs. In the sunroof

of a fucking car. I saw a tank with an open hatch. I don't know anything about tanks. My observation is that they keep the hatch open a lot. It gets stuffy. It must get stuffy. Do they not have good heat?

They don't have heaters. A lot of the tanks they're they don't have heaters in there you don't have heaters a lot of the tanks are using don't have heaters they were talking about the heaters only run work when the tank is running so they can't just sit there and idle the tank because they're not separate systems so in any case it seems like the hatch is open a lot and it's vulnerable to these drones just dropping them super accurately based on my reddit really cool shit and you know what the funny part is richard ryan did that over a decade ago on his youtube channel a drone dropping not just an explosive mortar shell but a uh one that that shot um i don't think it's radar it might be like lidar or something some it was it was it pinged

the ground and when it got to a certain um seems silly to call it altitude when we're talking about 15 feet but when it gets the correct altitude it air bursts over the target to get a bigger area of effect we'll call it and uh he did that on youtube like it's like i said a decade ago i remember like i was blowing up a car and i was thinking like richard's doing scary shit over there he's gonna get us all in trouble these ukrainian drones i see like we've seen you saw him take out cars i've seen him take out tanks because the hatches always seem to be open um they're also just catching people on their way into buildings or inside of buildings oh did you see the russian that was

just taking a shit and they got him he was taking a shit and they got him and I was like, come on, man. That's not chivalrous. Let the man live. The worst thing about it was it landed behind him so he got all of that up the arse. Not only was he killed, they gave him a complete hemorrhoidectomy. That's

one of those messed up things. They should have let him finish his shit. You remember in Band of Brothers where they give the Nazis or whoever the cigarettes? Let people have a little dignity before you spray them into the pit. I saw one where they watched from a drone while Russians sort of filtered into a sort of a lean-to house. Like, the structure was already kind of leaning over, but it was cover. And they waited until they trickled in there, and there's maybe like eight, ten of them. And then they hit it with an artillery strike.

So it's just like in sequence, boom, boom, boom, boom. And they're all dead. They're all so dead. I often wonder about that. This might be something you know more than me, but I see them very wounded and running another 12 feet. And I'm like, did they live through it? So when they drop those mortars, those are

hitting with shrapnel. Those are real powerful grenades. Normally you drop in that mortar tube and it's sort of up and over kind of thing. But they're dropping pinpoint on these guys. And so it's hitting them with shrapnel. And it looks to me like they're hitting the ground

and exploding. They don't have Richard Ryan's fancy technology. So it's probably doing like lower body damage the one i saw yesterday i saw it break the guy's leg and then him crawl to cover like you could see that his his right leg was mangled and completely unresponsive i feel like i saw this but didn't make the same observation like i didn't catch that his leg was mangled and there were like a bunch of people there like eight or something right i watch a lot of it so we may be comparing multiple examples but i saw the artillery strike and of course i've seen i've seen so many wild wild things we've never this is the first time we've um i guess vietnam

was the first war that tv cameras were there like they brought that shit back for the public to see they had we had the reels in world war ii but that was a different thing that was government made we got to get out there and take down the jets sort of stuff and then vietnam it was like this is the horror of war but now it's like this is the horror of war now right now this is what's happening on a street corner in ukraine look and yeah that this the humanity the thing is it's unfiltered as well because even when even with the footage that was brought back to vietnam this was like media companies and the government deciding what could and couldn't be shown so you were getting like a very like edited down version to get across the point that people wanted now it's just a completely raw dot mg3 file straight from boris's phone i only partially agree like I think there

is some unfiltered, and that's true. I also think I'm watching a lot of Ukrainian propaganda. The general message is we can do this. We can win this thing with our pinpoint mortars. We're barely even at risk here. We're just picking off Russians equipment and personnel

one by one with our drones as we drop them over, and we'll just keep this up. Have you seen the death toll? No, but I don't trust it. Well, it's the U.S.'s number. It's not even the... Oh, the U.S.'s number. I knew Taylor would jump on that so hard.

Well, give us the facts. At the top of your head, name 200 times the U.S.' lied about that it's gonna be it's gonna be hard to ever provide a source if we can't if we're just gonna say all sources are lies yeah like come on like like that's the number we have whose number do you want to use if we use russia's number it's got to be in the 20s of thousands like if you use the ukrainian number they probably say 120 000 but the united states who's been watching this thing more closely than anyone in the world and it clearly has bias but doesn't

look as good if we say that 80 000 russians have died and then things come to fruition actually like 12 000 12 000 and we were we're off by a little just like we don't want another weapons of mass destruction look like a fool on the on the grand stage at least as far as intelligence community is concerned. I would think that number of 70 or 80,000 is pretty fucking close. That's more than we lost in Vietnam. Zach posted something here that's much lower. Zach, is there a date on yours?

It says Ukraine estimates 43,000 Russians killed. NATO says 7 to 15,000. Oh, and Zach says that's like today. I just don't believe that. I don't know what to believe. I don't know why you don't believe it they're looking so closely but but here's the thing because i've seen completely different numbers maybe you're more educated but i don't even have a sniff test right like if if you ask me like 43 minus 19 i don't know that that's not a thing everyone knows but i can get close. I think it was probably not too far from 20.

So if the number comes in at 94, I'm like, ah, it doesn't pass the sniff test. This, I don't have any idea how many Russians were killed. If you told me it was 1,500 or 85,000, both of those numbers seem possible. Yeah. All right, so ukraine says 43 000 that have died ukraine has raised its estimate of russian soldiers to 43 i saw like 70 or 80 and it wasn't the ukrainian side i don't know what i was reading in any case it's got to be more than it's got to be more than 7 000 because they were talking about 7 000 like the first week

how do we not know generals like specifically like they're they're guys like they're like they have pictures of them does it say they don't because i've seen the third paragraph there it says 8 to 13 that's what i'm like you'd think you'd know fucking it's nine well maybe maybe russians as well though going like no no no vladislav is fine he's over there don't look vladislav is busy. This is Vladislav. It's the same guy. And you're like, blonde hair,

blocky head, I guess. Like, you were saying we're watching real unfiltered, whatever. I'm like, I feel like I'm watching the Ukrainian propaganda. Show me how easy it is to beat the Russians,

how the Russians are so vulnerable and make mistakes in their tactics. And while I love the show. Yeah, it's ongoing. while i love the show yeah it's ongoing while i love the show i don't really have a the background to say this is clearly true or untrue no no i feel that i can't say this this is the thing i see a lot i'm sorry to cut you off i've watched u.s military people observe other military people, like in movies, what's real, what's not. And every time they see soldiers bunched up, the U.S. soldiers, actual veterans with experience, are like, whoa, that sticks out at me tight. You don't stand six people together. That is asking for a shot, right?

Anyone who's played COD with Predator missiles knows you don't bunch up. That's a problem. Absolutely. So I'm watching these russians they're always bunched up on this footage they don't seem to have this aversion to being bunched up like the u.s soldiers do yeah poorly trained probably yeah i think this is a new kind of warfare that's never been fought before they're fighting a near peer someone who is almost as good as they are technologically in some ways more advanced in every way they don't have any

air superiority. The enemy can fly fucking 30. They can fly a Turkish drone that costs less than my goddamn car and wreck three tanks and then send that bitch home to get some more Turkish missiles to throw on the bitch. You know, I haven't found anyone that agrees with me on this yet. Oh,

I'm sorry. I thought you were rapping, but I think big, anyone that agrees with me on this yet. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were rapping. But I think big, powerful weapons of destruction are getting a little bit long in the tooth, outdated, right? The US depends heavily on aircraft carriers. And people who know more than me seems to say aircraft carriers are a really good idea. But I suspect if they were put to the test, we'd find that $10 million missiles take out billion-dollar aircraft carriers left and right. I think they'd get sunk.

And what we're seeing now is $10,000 mortars take out $1 million tanks left and right. I'm not sure tanks are even smart or good anymore. They're not that hard to beat, but they're expensive little death traps. Well, all right. So the Russians have fallen into a situation where they're they're just super vulnerable right like if they were if you're going to invade somebody i heard someone say you're supposed to have a three to one troop advantage for a proper invasion and they didn't come close to that so they're in this quagmire right so the enemy can set up all

these positions and ambushes and somewhere there's a bunch of kids i imagine those kids with their fucking drones charging batteries on power blocks and the Russians don't know where the power blocks are. They don't know. But those power blocks, wherever they are, are within range of Russian soldiers. And that seems like something that Ukraine

can sustain for the rest of time. If their warfare is $40,000 Turkish drones, soldiers with ak's on the ground they're willing to die for the country they got plenty of those and what mortars from drones which cost less than a thousand each then and and just don't even think of the musician the munitions as money because they're just free like there's a the biggest problem that i'm noticing right and this is one thing that has changed warfare,

is the fact that the general population are allowed to own firearms or has access to firearms. I don't know if you've seen that famous 4chan post where everyone goes where's your little AR-15 going to do against the US government with its aircraft carriers and blah blah blah. And then the guy goes, fuck face, aircraft carriers

can't go door to door. And he goes which is what you would need to do to enact full-blown totalitarian authoritarianism and he goes you ever heard the phrase every blade of grass yeah yeah so basically that's what happened in afghanistan it just got to the point where the problem is it's not just the army you can go and beat the army and then the generals can go, alright, we're beat. Stand down. The population answer to no one. They're going to go, fuck that. Go on. Start your car, lad. Come out, you black and tans. Come out and fight me like

it's going to fuck it. That's the way it's going to go down. Eventually, you're fighting not the army, the population who fucking hate you and want you gone because you killed a bunch of them when you were invading the fucking country like there's going to be bombings there's going to be honey traps another thing that the ira used to do send a really hot fucking irish lassie into a bar that's

frequented by soldiers and then she says oh i mean a couple of my friends are having a party you want to come back and i'll suck your dick and the soldiers would go fuck yeah and then when they got back to the fucking house party just five guys and masks boom dead honey trap man like that that type of shit would happen so see even if russia like successfully takes ukraine they won't hold it they will never fucking hold it because see that drone shit anyone can go into their back garden and just fly a little drone at that little checkpoint down the street it will fucking happen they'll never and the best part is they've got the richest most powerful nation that's ever existed backing them and and and and also europe i don't consider myself european don't worry about it we're too far off fuck them

i feel that no but it's true though i think that as long as we're happy and biden has turned on that money faucet for them like like it's rare to see us turn on that money faucet like he's done for them. I lost track of how many times they were like, and another 40 billion. They stopped doing it. don't see there there are maybe like three republicans who are saying you know i don't really like ukraine they seem woke but take those fuck faces and ignore them these things are passing like 97 to 3 the country with official nazi battalions seems woke yeah that's just a thing americans say we uh and it look they'll they'll say whatever they want to say it depends what they're what side of the argument they're on they'll paint it how they want to say depends what side of the argument they're on they'll paint it how they want to paint it because I saw Zelinsky was

maybe going to legalize gay marriage the other day and I'm sure he's getting flack for that I'm sure someone hates him now for that and it's like ah you see I told you but the thing is it's not the fucking time I disagree

I'm kind of to me it's not the fucking time I disagree I'm kind of to me get married oh that's great that's a huge comfort among the shit you know what would have been a better idea would have been to here's what I would have done instead if you really want to I would have said that region that Russia is occupying

that's now federal that we own that that's we're federalizing it all and we're giving away plots to soldiers yeah that's why i'm an anti-asian man it worked for the romans it worked for the romans man if i was zolinski i'd be exploring those alternative rules right now like you want to get married fucking knock yourself out we're in a You think we're going to enforce the anti-gay rule? How about polygamy? Open that up.

Do whatever. They're going to have to. You say you want to give away federal lands. How do we get soldiers laid? I would fight for that. Do you need any Russian impersonators to kind of fire the troops up and then go back to a hotel? Any of that kind of guy?

A smart woman would marry 10 Ukrainian soldiers right before they go to the front oh i'm just saying she'll never have to work again she'll be rich yeah it doesn't seem like it's going to end anytime soon no it won't i i don't remember what i said what i think i wanted to take bets and nobody wanted to but at least another year like at least another year we're rocking and rolling here. We're look, the U S has no interest in, in stopping this thing.

Um, the only people who want it to stop are the Russians and they can only have it stop in a certain way. So we got to wait till things look just right through the lens that Russia can throw up to the camera for this to ever end. That's the only way it ends. It doesn't seem like the Russian population wants out. No, they're on board as much as they call it.

When it first happened, I was seeing a bunch of anti-Russian stuff. Some Russians in concert saying, why are we going to war? We're the aggressors. You guys aren't seeing the truth behind this. There was a protest, maybe in Moscow, St. Petersburg. I forget where. But there were these somewhat biggish Russian protests saying that they should...

All that's gone. No one's saying that. I think a bunch of Russians died, and they're all like, you know what? They were dicks for fighting back. Let's go to war. As someone whose main focus in my work is freedom of speech, it's a different reason.

There's a different reason why you don't see those protests. Ah, you think the Russians are heavy-handed in dealing with those protests. Absolutely, they are. Very, very heavy-handed in dealing with those protests. I mean, basically, if you're a journalist and you say something critical about Putin or any of his allies, you tend to like, oh, he just passed out one night drunk and froze to death in the middle of the night no not even that one died last night you know that was it a putin critic he got that cancer only my enemies get

sarcoma yeah one was killed this week yeah in in washington dc there was a. 9 to 14 generals in Washington D.C. there was a jumper call and then they found one of Putin's critics dead on the sidewalk outside of his place in D.C. I think he was a critic or maybe a political opponent I wonder if they torture him at all first

did they just push him off or is it like ah he got a Glasgow smile he Glasgow smiled himself and jumped off a building we the kgb are very much still still the nkvd like they're they're like they are the kgb they've just fucking rebranded it was like it's like the cia when it's the same people the same tactics the same everything they just changed the sign that was on the door and went oh we're different now it's like i remember blackwater like the mercenary group they rebranded as like you know the happy farm

for hire by any country on earth it's like hey there's a bunch of rebels here and they're like yeah i've heard the congo's great this time of year like that's what they do well i mean like the legality of those private companies is kind of weird but it's not black and white the way i don't think well they've changed a lot about the laws but i know uh simon man he one of the most famous like uh pmcs was a executive outcomes that he was in charge of and they operated mainly in africa and i actually did a show in london just last month and he was there one of one of the mad lads that i did was like there and i was just sitting chatting away to him and he's he's kind of like you know you know like metal gear solid he was kind of like Metal Gear Solid. He was kind of like the big boss of Africa for a while. And usually it was like government.

See how civil wars were happening all the 90s and early 2000s in Africa? Civil wars were happening all the time. Rwanda and the Congo. Yeah. All that stuff happened. Yeah, he operated a lot of those places. And it was a case of whoever was in charge at the time would say our army's not good enough because because i'm just some warlord from a little fucking village

that became president through the last civil war so like so they were like we need some like professionals and they had a lot of shit on a fucking money and they would hire executive outcomes which was fine when it was the government that was hiring them. But Simon Mann ended up getting hired by, I'm trying to think of a way to put this delicately, people that were very, very closely connected to the Conservative Party of the United Kingdom, who were in power at the time. and he ended up going to equatorial guinea and africa and instead of being hired by the government he was instead hired by people with oil and political connections to overthrow a government and he went in and did it however don't know who someone snitched on them and when the plane landed they were immediately surrounded seized he ended up spending like eight years in a fucking equatorial guinean prison which was like hell on earth that's probably awful and it was a guy was a dictator and all that was like the guy was a dictator and you know what he did after i remember

when simon told me about this after he got out of prison basically there was a trade-off i don't know what the trade was but they eventually released them simon immediately went back to the uk he just went fuck that i'm staying out of africa for a while went straight back to the uk he then gets like a letter from the dictator in equatorial guinea inviting him over for a visit right and he's like you will be completely fine i'm not going to break any laws and just come over and let's have dinner simon went over had dinner with the guy and he's sitting there and simon says he thinks it's just a power play like the guy's sitting there just eating going i could have killed you whenever i wanted but i didn't it was just like a total power play like he's just sitting eating

steak with the guy that's just kept him in prison in an Ecuadorian prison. Oh yeah, it's fucking... Sassy! Sorry, a white guy in an African prison. Do you think he was bullied? He was... His words were something like,

I was not treated very well. An African prison? Yeah, he's still doing a couple of things over in Africa because he was telling me, he was, I'm not going to repeat what he said. He basically says this, this, and this. Oh, yeah, in the next five years, it's going to fucking kick off.

We back, we back, we back, baby. So, yeah, that's what he's doing no i mean there's plenty of other continents he can go try his luck on clearly africa's not not treating him right oh it's purely because like see in africa i see because the guys in charge a lot of them are fucking maniacs like they'll just go oh laws uh what don't you worry about that. Laws and shit? Yeah, don't worry. I would guess you've seen The Last King of Scotland. Yes, I have.

That guy is one of the most fascinating African warlords that there ever was. Maybe the most fascinating. Can I please read out his full title? Please, please. It's so good. I hope it rivals Denarius. Let me see. Where else is his title? Starting forward for the Lakers, Denarius. Let me see.

Starting forward for the Lakers, Denarius Michaels. I'll never stop getting you with that one. Here it is. What's her name? Edie Amin. His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshal, Al-Hajji Doctor,

Edie Amin Dada, VC, DSO, MC, CBE Lord of all the beasts of the earth and fishes of the seas and conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in general and Uganda in particular That's his full title

And also he was the uncrowned king of Scotland The last king of Scotland thank you the last king of Scotland which no he's fucking not you don't recognize his authority I think I heard MC in there can this person rap

what is it MC or military cross from the British armed forces which he never got he just made that up he has none of these awards. If you've ever seen his movie, if you've never seen his movie, very good. Forrest Whitaker plays him. I like Forrest Whitaker. James McAvoy is his foil.

He's like the maybe British reporter who's there to do a journalist type thing with him. Becomes his pal. You would come with me and I would torture people. It's like that sort of movie. It's really good. I wanted to know how he died recently so i did some research and i hope i hope it was right but he kind of died in exile in a middle eastern country i think but to the end he was like just let them know if they want me to come back i'm down you know and scotland too if they need me to come in and fill

in as king also down for that he was just so delusional all the way to the end what made him think he was the king of scotland he was a fucking madman like it was just fucking insane why did he why did he pick scotland he had lived in scotland for some amount of time and he really became enamored with the culture. I don't remember how he made that leap to thinking that he had some claim over the Scottish crown, but it might

have had something to do with him considering himself a king in general. And it's like, hey, I'm a king. You need one? Well, there's no current king of Scotland. Those redcoats well there's no current king of scotland so yeah those red coats have been giving you a hard time i'm just saying i love it when americans talk about this because they've no idea how sensitive a fucking subject i do i don't i heard you talking about the black and tans earlier oh yeah basically there's certain places in scotland where if you sing that song you will get stabbed.

We prefer that didn't happen to you. Is there a king in Scotland or not? How are there two sides to this? Oh God, I need to go into history going back to like the 1700s. But basically there was a thing called the Jacobite Rebellion. We had a king, but the king was Catholic. The English didn't like that because they were all protestants so they brought over william the orange which is why i remember how i mentioned about the orange walk earlier like basically that was that that was the protestants doing their little march where

they talk about how much they hate catholics and stuff like that so basically william of orange came over deposed the king he fled up north there was a little bit of a war he then ended up fleeing to france blah blah blah so basically the lineage of kings like completely changed right and then james king james had to flee over to france where he did marry into nobility blah blah blah so basically going down his family tree the current uh true heir of the scottish throne you, the true actual lineage, what's that little tiny country? Liechtenstein? It's like a prince of Liechtenstein.

And the problem is, everyone in Scotland sees his picture and goes, he looks weak. He looks like a little silly boy. I would never follow him. We're going to shove the king into a fucking locker. What's that thing where you guys have that feat where you pick up those stones?

You know what I'm talking about? The heavy stones. Ah, yes, the stone lift. Is it the... It was the one the mountain did, the Husabel stones, but I think that's Iceland. I thought there was a Scottish one.

No, it's Caber Torsen. We do the Caber Torsen. That's the big hole where we basically throw a whole fucking tree. And it's really fucking hard. It's really hard because the point is to get it to fucking flip over. And have you done it before? I did it once. I did it once.

I think I did it about three times. I managed to get two out of the three throws and get it to go over, but fucking hell. You're lifting up a whole tree. Essentially. Then you need to fucking use physics to fucking flip it over. It's really hard, but it's fun. It's good.

They're called the Dinny Stones. The Dinny Stones. The Dinny Stones. The Dinny. Dinny means don't do not it must mean don't try to lift this don't try to did he did he foul did he try and lift these didn't he try and lift these probably started as a joke scottish people are pretty funny oh then he did any steens two giant granite boulders located outside the old potash hotel ah is this some like old challenge or something i've not actually i think it i think it might be The Dinny Steens, two giant granite boulders located outside the old Potash Hotel.

Is this some old challenge or something I've not actually heard? I think it might be a Paul Bunyan type thing after I read it a little bit more. I think that someone supposedly carried those stones. It sounds like one of those... Donald's father, Robert Dinny, according to Donald's own account, back from 1860. That was when apparently the stones have only ever been carried by seven men. Oh.

Yeah. You need one of those men. What I was getting at is if a man like that was over in Liechtenstein, I think there'd be a bigger call to get him back home. Oh, there would. There definitely would.

But it's just like everyone... If you saw him lifting those you saw him like lifting those stones like easily and then tearing into some haggis drunkenly drunkenly well now he's in he's like there's a list to his like walk the whole way to the stones and then he does it and then it's like and he and he asks to come back like like i feel like you guys can make that happen is the lichtenstein guy uh only is he only child doesn't have like a brother you could like a younger brother who have a beefcake nothing like that no idea it's just i know that i know that he's like the lineage but i looked at me

he looks like a fucking accountant but you gotta skip that guy but i do like that the scottish people are like you know we'll try again in a few years, in a few generations. Maybe he'll marry a big Icelandic broad. We're about to have another referendum soon as well. That's another sensitive subject. There's a lot of things here you can't fucking talk about, by the way, unless you want to get in a fight. But the referendum is another vote

about whether or not we're going to be an independent country. What do you stand on that? Because that's a weird one you know with brexit i think that there was a lot of buyer shock uh you know when they saw what they had actually voted for yeah i don't know much about it obviously i'm on the other side of the fucking atlantic but seemingly it seems like there was a lot of buyer shock afterwards like like oh no we fucked up there was there was a there was a specific reason for that it wasn't so much like

we fucked up we knew there would be teething problems. You don't just cause this upheaval and then expect, oh, everything's going to go smoothly and perfectly. There's going to be a lot of bumps in the road. But the problem was the EU were not playing ball with us when it came to trade and rules and everything like that. And then basically we were going, going eu you're supposed to do this can you do this please the eu was going no and then it was fucking us up but then everyone's

like look what you think they were and they were like it's them they did it and speaking of the ira speaking of the ira again now this is a little funny hanging dead like the eu is trying to fuck us up with us but they have no fucking idea the problems this would cause basically the reason that the IRA and the IRA are still there they're still there, they're still out there but they don't do much anymore but they're watching and waiting and that's because of

the Good Friday Agreement basically the British government and the IRA sat down together and made this final peace deal we'll stop the bomb and stop the attack stop the war and everyone will be fine and there was a few stipulations like for example release every single IRA prisoner and all that which was which I believe was granted not all they got like they got most but not all but then there was also no hard border in Northern Ireland right so the Irish

could come and go as they pleased in Northern Ireland. Anyone could come in, anyone could come out. Now, because Britain has now left the European Union, the EU are now saying there must now be a hard border in Northern Ireland. The problem is the EU are saying you must now do that. That violates the Good Friday Agreement, which means that the contract has been broken and the ira would come back so they have to think very carefully about how they handle that so it's like the thing is the eu everyone in europe who does not fucking understand the situation is going but

but there must be a hard border and everyone in britain and even everyone in Ireland is going no do not fucking do that and everyone's like see anyone who like lived through the 80s and 90s and like remembers just hearing about like daily bombings and all that shit like nobody wants to return to that but the EU are just it's almost like they're trying

to do it on purpose because they're like you wanted to leave so I'm just going to reawaken that terrorist grip. I'm going to fucking bomb you. At least you can fish on your own water. I'm like, fucking, yeah.

That's really dodgy. I don't know any of this stuff at all. Do you guys? I'm old enough to remember the bombings and it made the news all the time that was back before you chose your own news it was on tv yeah and uh yeah there was always like some bar or some restaurant or whatever there were just car bombings bombing bombing molotov cocktails were like a big thing yeah um oh i think you misunderstood i knew about the ira

i was meaning i didn't know about that border like i didn't know matter that much that like having a hard border would like i didn't know about that detail okay we're turning back on now i'm well aware that when brexit came out i'm no longer here i was pro-brexit so i'm really like forgiving of other people that were pro-brexit who just didn't understand how complicated it was. I heard independence and my dumb ass American ass was like, yeah, I like it. Let's do independence. This is like kind of a, most Americans default to the position of like more freedom, more independence, et cetera. And now that I understand just what a tangled knot they're trying to unweave,

it's like there is no good solution to do this well. You can't do it without pissing so many people off that it was better where it was, I think. You disagree? I disagree, no. Definitely was the best reason because it was a we were definitely better off leaving because see the amount of laws that were getting passed in the eu that we like had to follow through on if there was any money that they demanded we had to pay it and everyone's like oh yeah but we got some money back and i'm like yeah but we were paying like so fucking much and and all that and

then everyone's like oh in exchange you get to use the trades and it's like well why can't we just negotiate our own trade contracts like there's even like weird stupid limits because i've been there in the eu parliament they have no fucking idea what they are doing no idea if there's anything that is to be regulated they will try to regulate it like i was in the day i was in and this was when we were doing the article 13 so i'm there and the strasbourg court like in the big room where they do the vote i'm essentially in the european senate like that's i'm sitting in there they were voting on regulations about how long polish candle makers were allowed to make the wicks and i'm i'm google it i'm not making that up right that is some of the dumb shit some of the other stuff as well as oh any any of this certain type of drink product uh must only come in 330 milliliter and 500 milliliter

cans or bottles but then there was this weird fucking custom drink in japan that makes its own bottles that don't fit that so then the eu had to pass another resolution to the bill to allow this one specific drink from Japan to be able to be shipped into and sold in the EU is so stupid. And that's the type of shit that we have to contend with. And everyone goes, oh, but you get your veto. You get your little fucking veto.

But this is the problem is Europe are massively fucking left-wing, apart from the eastern parts of Europe. Mainland Europe are overwhelmingly left wing and they are passing like left wing laws over right wing places so the right wing places

that's why you're getting Hungary and Budapest and all these other Bulgaria Romania are all going fuck this like we are sick of this fucking shit we want to fucking leave and all that it's because it's became overwhelmingly left wing like in the eu and that's why it's crumbling because it's not a balanced system here in both sides of the aisle it's one side of the aisle going here's the laws you're getting them tough shit here's article 13 that's just passed fucking overwhelmingly

where we're going to create essentially a great filter like they have in China to moderate online content. A great filter, okay. Yeah, basically that was Article 13. They've changed the name of it now, but that passed overwhelmingly. Something less scary, I hope. We're calling it the Doomsday Device now. Oh, right.

The same day I was in, they were voting on a resolution about ai weapons whether or not it would be okay for them to continue research into ai weapons and it passed so they're gonna yeah that won't backfire it's incredible how many movies start you sound like a subject matter expert on it and i'm not but it's super hard to be an actual subject matter expert on all this shit you know all the the tangled web that is the EU and the countries in it and who's going to get mad if you do different. If you pull out, people are going to be really mad.

And as you mentioned with that border, if you stay in, as you articulated, people are going to be really mad. So what do you do? Well, I think it's a case of it should never have happened in the first place. Like all this. The EU should have never happened. Yeah, it should never have happened in the first place like all this the eu should have never yeah yeah it shouldn't have happened in the first place like i think it started initially it's just a big trade agreement thing trade agreement whatever that's fine but then see as soon as you have another country able to have some semblance of say of what laws get passed in

your country over like a completely different culture. The amount of times that I see I argue with leftists online all the time and people bitch about, oh, they just drew random borders in Africa and mixed cultures together and caused wars and blah, blah, blah. And that's what the EU's doing. They're passing,

they are culturally different. People in Czechoslovakia have a completely different, fucking not there anymore, Czech Republic, have a completely different view on, I'm not there anymore. Czech Republic. They have a completely different view on the way society should be than people in England or people in France and all that. But then

they're passing laws over these and it's just causing conflict. That's why I think, you know, Scottish laws for Scottish people, English laws for English people, that type of stuff. Because who's going to know better how to govern themselves than themselves?

The more local it gets, the closer it is to the person being impacted. We wouldn't want to be under Canadian... We wouldn't want Canadian... Canadian? To be able to create a law that we were supposed to follow. I don't even like the laws that we come up to follow.

I don't want to follow some no you might have lost your audio i lost you on mexican laws but everyone he said he doesn't want to follow mexico yeah your kyle um your audio is definitely off kyle maybe this is a silly question but like like as an american like i i see the whole thing like the uk like i've seen that graphic where it's like oh here's the uk here's great britain here's like all that stuff yeah like i know scotland and ireland not too fond of england in a lot of ways is there any bad blood between the irish and the scottish or are you guys kind of like well we're in this together somewhat well uh scottish catholics and irish catholics get along, we're essentially

ethnically and culturally the same Scottish Protestants and Irish Protestants get along, same thing apart from basically the Catholics hate the Protestants and the Scots hate and love the Irish, it just depends

there's a lot of weird shit that most people don't know about, we've got segregated schools we've got catholic schools and we've got protestant schools i'm sorry you're not supposed to call them protestant schools they're called non-denominational schools but they're protestant schools yeah what is so as an outsider this seems like a very silly and mild thing to disagree over. What kind of Christian you are. You're all Christians. It goes a lot deeper. What is the difference?

Culturally, you live in the same places. You have the same blood in you. You look the same. You talk the same. What are you angry about? It's a case of Catholics believeolics you know believe in god and believe in the pope you know they like the pope and see the pope as the messenger of god protestants see whatever king or queen they have as sort of like the pope they are the messenger of god in

some cases they are gods now the protestants loved the royal family, and the royal family decided to go in and fuck Ireland up. So that's the problem. And then also they took a big chunk of it in the Northeast, and the Irish didn't like that. It turns out people don't like being invaded.

Let me repeat this back and see if I have it right. It's not actually about being Catholic or Protestant. It could be orange hats and green hats. The problem is that historically, orange hats and green hats have never treated each other nicely. No. The core differences are huge, though, right? It was Martin Luther, right, who nailed the shit to the church and separated.

And the whole idea is the Catholic Church is set up to be this fucking oligarchy, right, with these priests and these popes between you and God. And the Protestants are saying, that is a scam. They have set up a business between you and God. You can talk to God without paying a guy to handle the switchboard, okay? Anytime you want to talk to the creator of the universe, look up and start talking. You don't need to pay that guy. Oh, and by the way, you also can't pay him

when you go off and steal and rape and murder and pillage. You can't buy a pre from your sins with God. You have to talk to him about that, not a guy here. Huge difference. I don't know. Was was it a thousand years of people fighting and dying over it no you hit the religious differences there like you hit a big one right on the head that's and like if you and if you believe that with like your whole heart that's a huge difference of like basically one party saying like that's why the church hated luther so much

because you know looking back you go oh he nailed some edicts to the door whatever but it was basically him saying you're all frauds you're all scam artists everyone hey i'm i'm the james randy of hundreds of years ago i'm calling bullshit on this and of course the catholics are like it's not just that luther they hated they hated everyone who was attempting in their view to subvert the influence. Is James Randi the guy who proves psychics were fake? Yeah. Let me get my baby powder out real quick. You see the guy start sweating.

The old James Randi clips where he tricks those magicians are so fucking funny. So good. I'm sorry. I just didn't think everyone got your reference. I didn't and I appreciate you getting me there. Thank you. That would be the best gig on earth just being the guy in the 70s who was like all of these magicians are fake i'm gonna make that my gig disproving a 70s magician who who never looked

anything up online that's james randy that's wizard himself. Didn't one of the guys that he disproved go on to become a fucking child murderer or something like that? He disproved so many that after a while... I think it was the guy that done the phone book. What happened to his pinky? It looks like it withered. It looks like a gypsy put a curse on him. He's probably a fucking hundred years old.

He looks Gandalf mode. Look how big the nose is. It's like growing. Gandalf the Black. Have you seen Two Hobbits? That guy's so fucking old. I watched a new movie last night. Magic's a lot of shit, Frodo.

It's not for you. It's not for you, Frodo. Stop being a sucker. LED light, Frodo. Got it off Amazon. He's blowing out of his nose onto the book, Frodo. Put a bit of styrofoam and prove him

a charlatan. I watched a movie called The Black Phone last night. It's on... I don't remember which i'm it's on one of them for like free but uh it's ethan hawke and ethan hawke plays a uh child murderer he kidnaps little boys keeps them and murders them and uh it feels like a it's very much uh like a stephen king movie because it was written by stephen king's son

and i think it goes by a pen named joe smith or some shit like that it's on peacock thank you zach um i thought it was pretty good i'd give it a solid seven out of ten uh it's quick it's to the point and woody we would love it a lot because i remember the other day you're talking about signs how it gets to the end and you're like oh yeah the glass is a water and oh and okay swing away the guy's a fucking home run hitter and that yeah you liked how those pieces came together same something like that happens here when you get to the end all the you're like all right you know i get it everything seemed like everything came together uh it was called again black phone the black phone it's uh it's in like call it mid

70s i think you know it's thrown like telephone a telephone yeah yeah so so mild spoiler it's the premise the the young boy who's being held in the uh basement of this murderer there's a phone down there not connected to the wall and it. And there's somebody on the other end of a non-plugged-in, old-timey telephone. Okay. Very good. I thought a solid 7 out of 10. Really surprised. Did it spook you?

Was it more of an intriguing mystery, like thriller, or were you actually taken aback with scared? Not pop-out scared, like disturbed. Do you know what I mean? There was some disturbing imagery, I would say. But I would say this is one that if you were like 16, you could watch and not have a problem. This will not give

children nightmares, actually. Don't show children. This is not one to show children specifically because it's about a child murderer. It's more rough subject matter than anything you see. And honestly, the most disturbing visual thing that you see in the film i think is a father disciplining his daughter you're like oh damn the 70s were

rough calm down dad yeah he's like don't ice that bottom i want you to remember this and it's like fuck no i see her was he molesting his daughter no completely separate set his character is is disciplining their daughter and and that was to me i was like ah god i hate to see that ah come on she's had enough she learned her lesson uh i like i like the movie a lot uh there's not a lot of characters and a lot of them are children child character child actors thought they all killed it like i never had a problem with it especially um the little boy he's been kidnapped. He's your main character, I'd say. His sister, she's in the movie a lot. Both are really good child actors. And Ethan Hawke's always good at whatever he does.

He's not a great villain, but you see him without his shirt off, and you're kind of convinced that, okay, he's a physical, scary guy. You don't want to tangle with Ethan Hawke necessarily. Yeah, you have to be jacked to murder children. Well, see, that's the thing right like you don't but to overpower a 12 or 13 year old boy who's like fighting back in a hand to hand it's not like he's going to come down there with a gun like he's going to come and like kill this kid with his bare hands or a knife or something and you see ethan hawke without his shirt on you're like oh shit this kid doesn't stand a chance.

Like that's not an option. Like fighting back doesn't seem to be an option for this guy. We got to think our way out of this puzzle. And he's being kept in a soundproof basement while the search for him continues. This looks good. The way you said that's not an option is how I instantly thought of everyone in the,

in my life who said to punch that bully in the nose. It's like, if the bully was at risk, he wouldn't be doing this. It's not an option. That's such a funny thing they would tell you as a kid. If you are bullied, you just pop them right in the face.

And it's like, generally the kids that bully are doing so because they can't be stopped. They've realized, oh, I'm bigger than everyone and the adults can't hit me either at this place. Okay. Because that's this kid named Jared in kindergarten in first grade.

He was this big kid. And I remember when she shoved me down in line and I was just like, I don't really know if there's recourse here. Like, I don't know if I can do anything about this. Trust me, that bully. You know, that might be true, but he's in no danger. I got bullied in like the sixth grade by an enormous black girl. Huge. The girl's even worse.

She can't fight back. Exactly. That's what I was getting at. The worst possible person to be bullied by is a giant black girl. Because when you tell the story later about how you beat up a black girl, you can't be like, you don't understand. She was one of them big ones. Like,

like, like nobody wants to hear that shit. They don't want to hear that. She was like five, 10, 190 fucking pounds. And she was taught. She was looking down at me,

shoving me. No one wants to care that I ran away. And then she chills chased me down when I thought the chase was over and caught me later. No one. No one cares. No. Oh, we lost your audio. Audio was again. God damn it. Lost you a couple times tonight.

I don't know what the fuck's going on. Yeah, you don't want to get beaten up by a girl or picked on by a girl because there's no recourse. I don't think I ever had to deal with that ever in my childhood. Did you guys ever have a girl yet? I famously dealt with that shit and i dealt out recourse i remember you you like a fucking tell us what's the tale of how you beat up a woman

i'm interested i've told this story many times on my channel before but i in fast forward which they teased me for and there was this girl she was in my grade i'm 13 years old i just entered high school uh which is ninth grade 13 years old and she was bullying the fuck out of me so i hadn't hit puberty yet and i was like wide in the hips and she used to do that like hourglass thing with her hands to describe me that's too much music and um and she would call me gay right but not just gay like she's gay he's the f slurries this that and and just like chirp at me chirp at me as freshmen in gym class we'd run laps around the track that was what we did for gym every freaking day and the

track was like maybe two blocks from the school so on the walk back she'd just follow me and harass me day after day after day non-stop insatiable with the like just her love of bullying me and um while she was a girl she occupied like a much higher social strata than me and um one day my dumb ass was like, talk like that. We'll get you slapped. That's what I told her. So she changes it. She's like, slap me,

slap me. I dare you. Slap me, slap me. I want you to slap me, slap me, Woody. You won't fucking do it.

You're a pussy. And I didn't. And then the next day, same fucking thing. Slap me, slap me, Woody, slap me,

slap me. I dare you. You won't do it. You're a fucking pussy. I wound up. I didn't slap her like this. My hand was down here. Left heel making contact.

I just, boom, backhanded her as hard as a human can hit another one. At least as hard as I could. She belongs to the streets. And she was shocked. Right and and oh my god the five finger like welt on her face that started to redden up was obvious there was no getting around what happened they could have matched your hand yeah they could have they could have taken fingerprints off of his back of the hand and um i just hit her the one time, and that was like the end of it.

Unbeknownst to me, she's dating the captain of the wrestling team. I don't even know what this guy looks like, right? But I don't have a chance. I don't know what's going to happen. So for the next few days at school, I'm living in fear. I'm like, what does he even look like? His name is Tim something. And one day they're like, Woody, you'll know it's him.

There's a wrestling match today. So everyone on the wrestling team wore a shirt and tie to school. That was a thing they did to sort of, you know, whatever. And I'm eating at lunch. And this guy with like two henchmen comes up to me all wearing shirts and ties.

You know, you get what you get, you know, we'll see. So I turned and he's like like are you the one that hit jen and i was like yeah yeah that was me and this is what he says he goes i know what she's like you can't do that again and i was like okay yeah and that's how it ended my theory is he heard the whole story like i told it like like

he didn't just hear that woody hit her like out of the blue or whatever he probably heard that i was getting bullied by this girl for months and um and she broke me and that's well that guy had some self-control that's good what he was i was gonna say a nice bully he wasn't even a bully seems like he was dating a bully he seems like he was a good guy hopefully they broke up, I hope he's doing well yeah, he seems nice I understand

I understand I've done it really, how did your situation go? did you ever have to smack a girl in self-defense in school, Dank? no uh but i used to work as a bouncer so i've i've had to right i would see when it's two big massive roid heads full of cocaine right i would a hundred times over rather break them up than two girls jesus christ because if it's two big guys they're throwing

punches you get into the middle of them and you push them back and like they're like nine times out of ten they're not going to try and hit you they'll try and punch past you but they'll try and be cool with you but they'll still they might even low-key be happy to stop fighting yeah yeah some of them are like some guy will like use, use the shield. Like, you know, you're lucky he's holding me back. That type of shit. But see when it's two girls and you're in, you're in the hair, trying to untangle fingers out the hair and everything. And then you can't tell what hairs really isn't because the extensions have

come out and stuff like that. And it's just like, it is an absolute nightmare. But one of the worst ones that happened to me was, but also see as someone who's worked in security anytime there's a fight almost a hundred percent of the time it's over a woman a girl has been involved at some point some guy brushed against the guy's arse when he walked past the bar he said something he shouldn't have or whatever or someone is now dating this guy's ex and he wants to go up and say some shit like it's always been stuff like that but there was two girls fighting i'm

getting in and one girl was on the ground she's on her knees and like they're just throwing wild punches each other you know when girls fight two girls fighting two girls yeah i'm like two ghettos well okay that's a little bold, but... You know, when two ghettos fight... It is a rough deal when two ghettos fight. That's kind of racist about my accent. Uno reverse.

It's the same as Sargon of Akkad. I can't say his real name. Karl. I call him Karl. Not Karl. Well, I can't do that real name, Carl Carl, I call him Carl not Carl I can't do that, I call him Carl but basically, one girl's on her knee, and you know how whenever girls just grab

the hair, pull the head down and just wildly throw like a hundred punches, maybe one of them lands, right, so I'm one girl's on her knees and I'm in between them trying to like use my body to block the punches because it's girls like they don't hurt, right, but I'm trying to untangle the hair the girl behind me had reached like through the gap under my legs and she couldn't see she then grabs my crotch and just crushes from behind me

and i'm sitting shouting at her going it's me that's me you fucking grabbed it everyone like that she dug her fucking nails in because she thought it was the other girl, so she's trying to dig her nails to hurt her, I ended up after it, she's outside, her mascara's all down her face, she's all fucked up from the fight, and she came up like, I'm really sorry, I didn't know that was you, I'm sorry,

and I'm like, it's fine, went into the toilet for a piss, I've got scratches all over my dick, right, all over my dick right all over my balls all over the inside of my leg fucking everything and then i had to go home to my wife like funny story like this girl you know believe me yeah no look at luckily luckily like there was witnesses and all that as well, but one of them involving a woman, this was, and I was impressed

by this, even though I was almost blinded for life, right? I shut my eyes just in time. Two big guys, long story, but these guys had a problem with each other, and we always had to keep them apart in this bar that I was working in, right? But then one day it came to a head, and they ended up fighting.

So we get in, and there's three of us getting in the middle of it, because it wasn't just these two guys. It was, like, all their friends jumped in as well. So we're trying to form, like, the wall in the middle of them to keep them apart, but the two main guys are fighting. I try and get into the middle of them, and just as I'm pushing, like, the big guy away, this guy was, like, 6'7". He was a fucking big dude, right?

The other guy's girlfriend has ran behind him, and, like and she'd grabbed the glass and jumped on a stool jumped on a table remember the fucking end scene fave fucking what was that fucking looney tunes basketball fucking movie like space jam she goes leaping through the fucking air like that and just smashes the glass right down in the guy's head but I shut my eyes just in time and just tons of tiny shards of glass hit me in the face. A couple stuck

and everything and I was cut but it was like little tiny, tiny, tiny cuts and everything but then we were trying to, after she smashed the glass, that was all the girls got up and it was a fucking riot. We had to call the police and we're like grabbing people and wrestling them out the club. But then as soon as we come back in and break up the rest of the fight,

that person we just threw out would come back in and like keep fighting and everything. So yeah, that was a fucked up night. But that's like, even though I was nearly blinded, it was, it was fucking impressive.

Like she got air she got fucking air and she had she had a target fucking dead on i mean i was angry but you know yeah i respect her so when when all the pug stuff happened to you you said you had a youtube with eight subscribers did you have any plans whatsoever to go into video making before this happened youtube was a stupid side hobby like my first ever video that i uploaded was just me zooming in on the dog's face and calling him a cunt that was like that was like my first ever youtube video it was just a dumb side project to do for fun with my friends.

But then every time, like I would make some videos, like giving updates and stuff like that, like sort of talking about certain things. And then I was only doing that as a bit of fun. I was like, I'm not making a go at this. But every time I went to court, like I would get in the papers again, subscribers would go up. Other YouTubers wanted me on their podcast and to talk to me

and then people would subscribe to me. And then ended ended up like it was actually sargon that was like you should start making videos like you know what you're talking about and everything you should just go for it so i started doing it more and more and featured on other people's channels and kept going back to court for more court dates and it just grew and grew and grew and grew and now it's my full-time job now and i've got a studio and staff and all kinds of stuff now which i did not expect this this was not planned because the thing was as well and like the amount of people that bitch about me going online and like like laughing at like leftists and all that stuff all the time is they get angry about it and i'm like you know

that the reason that i'm here doing this is because you wouldn't let me get a fucking job yeah like i wanted to just go back to normal i tried like i didn't want to make a go of youtube but you wouldn't let me get a job so i had a shit ton of free time and guess what i did with it and then it turned out it got popular so basically it's their fault everything everything i've said and every bit of trouble i've got and since is their fault yeah you could be working at joe's pawnery or whatever the fuck i can't even let you to do with it i should i should be the arsehole bouncer again i should be i should be doing the doors in glasgow that's what i should be doing but no i'm fucking on youtube now that was i did try and go back to normal i didn't want that was the thing

i see being in the public eye and all that type of shit i was like i don't i kind of don't like this i don't like people i don't know knowing about me and all this shit and i'm like tons of people know my name i don't like that and all that and it was just kind of weird so i wanted to go back to normal but it's weird when you meet them like you meet you meet someone to you that's a total stranger but yeah they know a lot about you yeah information disadvantage it's all my favorite kind of people some of them are funny i had one guy that came up to me in the street and went like that count dankula i've seen your balls and i was like yeah uh hello good good to meet you too man yeah well it seems like it's worked out pretty well with your success on youtube you got almost a million subs is there

any more fallout you might have to deal with from the pug prank or is that in your in the past everyone's still absolutely convinced that i'm a nazi and that video was me trying to get jews killed like there are some people out there that are so it's how long has it been this is 2022 this fucking like six years yeah six years ago like fucking and people are still fucking going on about it going indirect way to kill jewish people teaching your dog to nazi salute like i would have done something so much better if that was my intention. At no point would I have done this and went, yes, this is propaganda.

People will definitely take it seriously. Step one, the dog. Yeah, the dog. You would have been Hitler's top guy. But that was like, but the problem is, is I did this to sort of counteract it. Everyone goes, oh, you made that video and that means you're a secret

white supremacist and then I post the other video that I made of me teaching my black pug to salute whenever I say black power and whenever I say fuck the police he gets dead excited and all that and I'm going well this obviously

means that I'm a black supremacist and I support BLM and they go well that's not the same because because dumb fucking reasons there's no argument after that like guys come on he's clearly just doing anything that requires a salute that a dog you need a chihuahua you could go far with that there's a lot of chihuahua well the part of the meta comedy of it is even though white supremacy, the master race and pugs, that is definitely not something that they are because their lungs are in their fucking ears

it's just the most genetic abomination if there's any animal where you have to get a part of its throat removed if you want it to live past 8 years it's not supposed to be here they're a fucking abomination if you want it to live past eight years it's not supposed to be here yeah it's not like

they're a fucking abomination but are you getting a dog oh uh yeah yeah i'm um i'm going to uh the animal shelter later uh either early either tomorrow or um a couple days from now i couldn't get him to answer on the phone today i called a different shelter and uh they only do like visitation between a certain couple of hours for some they're very lazy these animal people i don't they're always complaining about not being able to get rid of the dogs but you try to get a dog and they won't give them to you now can you see what the inventory is online it's been a long time since i rescued a dog so you can go there and you can be like so a lot of times particularly visitation my leg is the fucking jew so there's a few dogs maybe you have your eye on see how they react

when you get there yeah yeah and i've looked at like multiple shelters so there's a there's a bunch of dogs but uh there's one place that that in particular seems to have fewer pitbulls um and like pitbull mixes that that's the predominant like homeless dog let's just call it that in atlanta pit bulls i'm racist against pit bulls i don't want one you can just leave it at that uh i don't want to talk about fucking statistics right now but like i just don't want a pit bull i want like uh maybe a german shepherd um but something that kind of looks like that maybe or some some cute fucking little dog that's 30 to 60 fucking pounds something like that i want a dog that'll like chill and sit on the couch and play fetch and all that shit but i don't want a dog that could like clamp onto my hand and i have to like murder it in my kitchen

when i cry with a kitchen knife like i don't need that it's latched on finger it's butthole it ate my fingers it started with them so yeah gonna hopefully now they catch me like that and they dog is defending itself from my and i go to jail dogs out there on the street biting more fingers off now fuck those dogs there's just they're ugly, if I'm being honest. I want a cool-looking dog. I want a dog that looks like it could get some dog pussy if it hadn't been neutered. You know what I mean? I always say I want a dog that looks like it could maintain a decent Instagram.

Okay? And I'm not interested in doing that. I'm just saying. If we put this dog on Instagram, he'd have 5,000 or 6,000 followers quick. He'd want to know what Rufus was up to. Yeah, I saw one. There's a husky corgi mix. He's like a little stunted corgi. Looks real fucking cute.

He's definitely in the running. There's like maybe 12 dogs I'm looking at that are all, like I said, like 30 to 70 pounds and I don't know, fuzzy. And they're 80 bucks. You could get all 12. Dude, they're having a special right now at one of the places. I can't believe there's a special on an 80 dollar dog. They're $ a special right now at one of the places. I can't believe it's a special at $80.

They're $20. They're like all of I don't know if it was all of August or all of the fall. It was like everything must go. It was like $20 adoptions. And the thing is you go through their adoptions and a lot of them have heartworms which isn't a big deal. Apparently they make it sound like

I have heartworms but you just you know you give them their medicine and they'll be fine so i'm not too concerned about that but a lot of them you don't haven't been vetted oh that's no pun intended they've been vetted but not but not vetted you don't know why they're there right yeah there's some of these places and they're like this is carlos he's a 12 year old beagle on his last legs but he needs a forever home his owner died he's great with children babies cats and squirrels like oh wow he sounds like a real good guy to know for the next six months of his life like you know what's up with that guy but some of these places it's like we call him dingo

20 bucks you should get multiple dogs it's one of those ones if it's only six months old if the dog's only six months old when i heard that they were 20 i was mad because i went the other day and they told me i was there on the wrong fucking day and i wanted i thought i was like if i had told that girl if i pulled out like a wad a hundred dollar bills and been like look i want one today and let's just round it up to $350 for the dog, because I think you guys need the donation anyway. We'll call it a donation. And maybe you can take as much of that money as you want, but I'm just telling you, I'll give you $350

and you get me a dog today. I don't care who keeps the money. I think she's just taking me back there and giving me the dog. I'm giving him $350 either way. I figure that's a fair donation for a fucking mutt who's probably going to ruin my life. Are you supposed to donate in addition to the $20? You're not supposed to, but I think it's like you order a door to act.

It's like an unwritten rule I'm asking? I think it's the right thing to do. It's more of a Kyle thing as opposed to a custom I'm unaware of. The charities that I donate to are always dog fucking charities because I feel sorry for those fuckers. I'll donate some money, a few hundred dollars. How many dogs are you going to get?

Probably just one dog. How many do you really want total no i'm gonna get one dog i think because uh like i said i look at you and i see pack leader pack leader oh okay yeah so you're gonna need more than one follower like a dozen at least for proper start with two feel like those african gangs that walked in the street with fucking hyenas and shit man i'll admit though i would not fucking have a pet hyena but those pictures look fucking badass like they do they do but like how i feel like that's more of an intimidation thing can you train a hyena really well is it just gonna going to go bananas and kill it?

The fact that in the pictures they're all muzzled, I don't think so. There's no way that after they're done with their quest for the day of intimidating someone Oh, look at that good guy. Look at it. It's conspiring to kill that child. It's literally laughing.

It's a serious question. Serious question. Not a bit. You put that hyena and a pit bull in the octagon. What happens? The hyena is going to kill it. So the hyena has one of the strongest bites in all of Africa. They're the animal that comes along after the fact

and crushes the animal bones to get the marrow. It might be the pit bull. I think it has the strongest bite in the world. I think for PSI, pounds per square inch or something. I heard that the crocodile and the pit bull

were the two that had the strongest bite. Now, I heard that from a police dog trainer. I don't know. Oh, he's a liar. Yeah. And a pig. He looks like a dog. yeah okay in woody's in woody's like defense here i mean the the pitbull is not even fucking close not even near it but the saltwater crocodile lapped everybody else it says 23 000 psi for that and then the next highest is a great white at 4 000 how could that even be is hyena on your highest is a great white at 4000. How could that

even be true? Is hyena on your list? Is a human being like 250 or so? No, hyena isn't even on here. But these are all big-ass animals. Sharks. But it's PSI, right? Maybe if you gave a blue

whale a bite test, it'd be a very tight bite, but not per square inch. I also, I don't know. I would like to see a hyena fight a pit bull though. I think that's a real good matchup that I've never thought. Fuck it up, man.

I think I'm sorry. I'm sorry. The hyena would absolutely destroy any pit bull you bring to the table, whether it's a so-called game pit bull or fighting dog. It doesn't matter. A spotted hyena could kill a pit bull with one bite to the neck without even holding on. The hyena would break whatever bone it latches onto

on the pit bull on top of that. The hyena has a 50 to 60 pound weight advantage and is three times as strong. I didn't know hyenas were that big. I doubt Zach wrote this. He probably found it. Yeah. Oh, yeah, he found it. No, he's a hyena keeper. You don't talk hyenas unless you talk to Zach

first. I keep telling him it's not going to take off. It would be great to bring, like, I don't know, Michael Vick's pit bull fighting farm show up with a hyena. See how it goes? They don't let that man ball out if he hadn't been using hyenas instead of pitbulls.

There's too many protection agencies for dogs. You start fucking with them, you're going to miss some seasons. I didn't realize hyenas were in such a different league than pitbulls. I've seen pitbulls defend other dogs in the house against wild animals

before yeah i think that's the other thing whenever we set up these like fictional animal fights is like animals in the wild don't usually want to fight unless there's something to fight over yeah they'd use like like most of the time they're just like fuck this no reason to hurt each other i don't know what you even are a hiya what like you know right like it but if there was like a reason or they're like thrown into that pit scenario literally where they're one-on-one that's a big boy all right so i think it's some forced perspective look i i'm as a kid who grew up shooting deer like well you know how to take the picture to make this that's an that's an overweight man we made a good fucking shot there though uh and and i don't know what that rifle is, but it looks meaty.

Yeah. Okay. What is his head on? Is that a volleyball? A rock or something? No, no. A stock? A rock.

Oh, okay. A stone of some kind? I don't know. Nothing. Not like a name brand hyena head joist or anything. I was looking for a perspective. Like, you know, oh, that's a volleyball. You know how big that is.

Ah, I see. I just found a 5,000 word article of a guy breaking down a fight between a hyena and a wolf. I'm curious. What are your guys' takes? I won't say anything. Who do you think went? Just to clarify, they're both pack animals, but this guy's, for the sake of

example, it's a one-on-one. I guess I go with the hyena but the one thought i've had throughout this whole thing is i think the female hyenas are the big ones and the male hyenas are the little ones so we're talking about a female hyena versus a male wolf we're just picking two big two big examples it doesn't matter what what sex they are just the size i think i go with the hyena because the hyena lives in a world where he's dealing with bigger scarier predators the wolf lives in a world where he's dealing with bigger, scarier predators. The wolf lives in a world where he is the top dog. The wolf, he's a scaredy cat, right?

He really picks his fights. I don't think wolves take on scary shit. Hyenas battle lions. Yeah. They outnumber them. But hyenas are fighting lions. Wolves? Wolves are scared of me.

You know, they're skittish. They will run. Yeah. No, you guys are all right. It's the hyena. And the only big benefit that the wolf had in the matchup was claws. Because I guess the hyena doesn't have claws that can really do damage. But, like, at least four paragraphs of this is just going through the way that a hyena and a wolf,

should they latch onto each other at the same time, which apparently would happen when these kind of animals fight, that the hyena would be really upset by the wolf's bite, but the hyena's bite would destroy any bone in the way. It could almost behead a wolf with its bite. Here's a good one. I'm sorry to interrupt you. Jack, will almost behead a wolf with its bite. Yeah. Show us. Here's a good one. Here's a,

I'm sorry to interrupt you, Jack, will you show us a hyena skull? So it's like large hyena skull. So I think if we look at like the jaw, like, and the, and the teeth, it'll might get average hyena skull.

Let's be real here. I think if you see, get some perspective on how big a hyena skull is, like, like we'd know how big this thing really is. Yeah. I know that when I saw a Buffalo for the first time i was like wait what that's real like like when you when you meet a giraffe for the first time in person it's it's shockingly they're enormous

so the real benefit the wolf has over the hyena is that it's a lot smarter so like a pack of wolves would be able to orchestrate attacking something i I guess, better than a hyena pack. They'd get that rifle. That guy had, they'd, they'd pilfer it. Yeah. Yeah.

So it'd be great to have perspective hyena in the back. So I'm going to choose to believe it's that big one in the center. Okay. So on the left is a hyena on the right is a mastiff of these two. Oh, Oh, I mean, is a hyena on the right is a mastiff of these two oh oh i mean those are some real deal molars on the on the hyena yeah that's what i want to that's what that's how it like crushes bones so from what from my david attenborough uh knowledge it you know it uses those back molars back there

to just crush bone and get to the marrow that way it doesn't matter if the lion is the top predator there's gonna be leavings that only the hyena can access by cracking his bones. They think that's how early man first developed his taste for protein and meat and sort of took that step because bigger brains need more calories, and they think the only way

we could have gotten it is by scavenging and getting the marrow from the kills of saber-toothed cats or whatever the fuck. You don't think that it's mushrooms like Joe Rogan? I don't think that that's crazy to say, but I don't think so. I don't think so. I saw a short of Joe Rogan today,

and I guess the guys who originally discovered and deciphered the Dead Sea Scrolls, the only one on that team that was not religious said that it was a complete misunderstanding, the whole Judeo-Christian religion, that the Jews were trying to hide their practices from the Romans, so they hid what the religion was actually about in a bunch of fairy tales and nonsense.

But he thinks it's about, again, mushrooms. That guy thought that it was God would rain and then suddenly these mushrooms would pop up when god sent the rain and they'd eat god's mushrooms and they'd have to trip out and that seems even less likely than it being the word of god like truly it's more likely it's the word of god than what you just said well we see that but but we see that in those little cultures right those little shamanic cultures that that do have like a medicine man who's doing some fucking mushrooms in there and that's their religion he's the one who comes and the guy who's high as fuck is the one who comes out is like so first the moon was

small but then a woman they're making the nonsense up off their high gourds, right? So, I don't know. It makes a little sense to me. Another great job. But I mean, that's why those societies top out at 14 people. All of us messed up with our career path because it's clear that organized religion is the place to be. Organized religion is the place to be.

That is where we belong. It really is. I wish I believed. I truly do. And I wish there was something more to believe in. It would be so fucking comforting. Give me some proof. Give me just a little. I've been on this earth for nearly half a century.

I haven't seen a shred of evidence. You got this book where God is just popping off all the time. Anytime he sees some shit he doesn't like, he's sending an angel or a flood or some pestilence or some bears you show me one magical bear if a bear walks down the fucking streets of my atlanta neighborhood i'll believe that's all i need well all right not any bear if they're like yeah circus bear got out of that but a magical bear shows up there were magical bears they were murderous bears if you recall magical murderous bears like a bear that flies i would believe i saw i i told

that story from the the the elisha one yeah oh yeah we're i don't know uh dank are you familiar with the bible like or did you just like go to religious schools and like they kind of drilled in your head but you didn't not they drilled that into my head but i was just kind of like it's not for me so yeah okay when i was a kid i was in the same situation except i was so goddamn scared of hell i was like anal about it like i gotta take this serious this is real like if and i remember as a kid like my thought process being like like the teacher would say something in sunday school or whatever about like hell is very real. And people will end up there if they don't believe in Jesus. And it is torture for all eternity.

Now let's talk about Job or let's talk about Jonah and the whale. And I remember like all the other kids, like the teachers, the parents, they just kind of move on. the parents they just kind of move on and i would be like the one person who like was treating it like it was truly real in my head where i'm like guys we can't be talking about jonah hell is coming imminently we need to be prepared for this we need to be going for the big fish first guys and over like over getting older i was like if a lot of these people really believed this they would have been acting like i was as a kid like Like, God, hell is there. It's imminent. Everything we do needs to be fixated on not ending up in hell.

What could matter in this material plane? There are people like that. When we see the people who believe, we stop and go, oh, that's not a real Christian. When you see a real Christian, the rest of them in the room are like, oh, he's not one of christian when you see a real christian the rest of them in the room are like oh he's not one of us because the guy who actually reads that book and does what it says cannot

survive in mainstream life anymore like yeah that doesn't work yeah see one of the one of the things that obviously i do videos on like celtic myths and stuff like that because a lot of them are like dying out and a lot of people don't know about it. But there was one story where Celtic myths are things like the Kelpies, which are magical horses that could walk on water. And there's also things like the Nucleave, where it's this half-man,

half-horse that had a breath that would just rain pestilence down and all that. But then there was another story I read and it's called The Gilly Do. Now, The Gilly Do was a guy that lived in the forest and he had clothes made of leaves and all that but then there was another story i read and it's called the ghillie do right now the ghillie do was a guy that lived in the forest and he had clothes made of leaves and shit like that which is where i'll see ghillie suit that's where it comes from like the ghillie do right the guy that lives wearing twigs and stuff like that and leaves and sometimes kids would get lost in

the forest they would come across the ghillie do the ghillie do would say well it's night time now it's too dangerous to go out come back to my house and like the first light in the morning i'll take you back out he would feed them they would go to bed the next day they got up he would lead them to the forest and go your village is that way be more careful in the woods and i'm like why is this a fantasy story that's just a guy that lives in the woods. I was like, see if he was like talking to the animals or like the trees moved when he sang or like moved out the way or there was some, he's a guardian for lost travelers. He was just getting to meet the fairies or something.

I was like, this isn't a fantasy story. I completely believe this happened. I completely believe there was an eccentric lunatic dressed in vines who would say, I am familiar with this small regional area. Allow me to assist you. That I live in. Yeah.

This is where I live, my forest. And everyone's like, yeah, this mysterious creature. It's not a mysterious creature. It's a guy that lived in the woods. That's all it fucking was. Maybe that was an early on. like that's all it fucking was but i never maybe that was early on maybe that was an early on myth before there was a precedent set that they had to be fun and like they just started telling that one and then someone pops up later with the pestle and centaur and then they start moving forward

with the good ones because i imagine like look at the roman pantheon the greek pantheon rather they didn't hit that out of the park on the first try guaranteed like they probably had to workshop zeus and the rest of the cast because that's a way harder thing to to hold together than christianity where it's kind of one guy and it all comes from him that's what i remember thinking that was so cool as a kid and like as a kid being like obviously this is fake and jesus is real but like man it would be cool if it was these like semi mortal people that were in charge. I feel like they'd be able to empathize with me a little more.

They're very flawed. Yeah. And I've said this before, but our modern superheroes are the Greek Pantheon. Like it's the same shit. Like, and if you look at the powers of those Greek gods, they're about equivalent to a Marvel superhero.

Like most of these guys aren't like... It's not like Zeus comes down and says, ah, water into wine, and the earth explodes, and you're made of gas now, and you're made of trees. He can't do that shit. He's Zeus. He's the god of fucking thunder. He can change it. He's got powers, but he's not limited.

But they all have to do with getting laid. Every Greek story could start with just unfortunately Zeus was horny yeah every single one it is every single story about Zeus is like and then

he used his shape shifting powers to gaslight a woman and fuck her and 30 million people died and it's like oh okay and then all of Athens fell into the sea and it's like okay and then all of athens fell into the sea and it's like oh well this is written by someone from sparta with some you know an axe to grind probably it's funny like thinking how much of history that like we think of as like objective fact is like something that got slipped in there where some guys like and like like imagine like

alexander the great was most likely gay but imagine if he was like a fucking conservative priest like pastor level like like i'm not gay i'm gonna suck a dick in front of you to show you how much i don't like it like like that level of thing like it would be funny if like one of his enemies slipped that in after the fact like he's a great warlord this and that yeah but his buddy uh uh paris he was he was fucking him in the ass did you hear about that no but this is this is the year 300 800 bc throw it in was it was it was it nero was it nero that had a femboy it was yeah now that's the right one it's obviously not the name i said but Yeah, I can't remember. It was Caligula or Nero, one of the two.

Basically, his wife died and he was beyond distraught. But then his little wine boy that brought him his wine, he kind of realized, you look a lot like my wife. You are my wife now. And the more wine you bring me, the more you look like her.

The more wine you bring me, the more wine. It was basically some weird shit where he fucking like made him grow his hair long and everything and was going around everyone and was going this is my wife you will refer to her by her real name my wife and all the roman soldiers who are terrified of him are like yes your wife looks lovely today nero it was one of those like no nobody wanted to say anything the emperor has no clothes you know like it's scary i remember i was reading this thing about you know there's that old thing about nero you know playing the the equivalent of the violin or a fiddle or whatever on the the balcony of his palace as rome was burning right yeah and i was reading this and this is a while ago it was some some guy who's

clearly obsessed with all these emperors and he's like little known fact that's actually false he wasn't playing the violin while rome was burning this is used to malign nero's character and then like the next paragraph is like he was in the basement molesting children while it burned like and it's like this is worse like this is much worse than where we were at a few minutes ago but i was like that's one of those famous things that ends up becoming like a fucking like urban legend and one of the ones that see how you've seen it all the fucking fucking Pinochet throwing communists out of helicopters like me

turns out all of that's bullshit Really? Pinochet didn't throw communists out of helicopters? He murdered a lot of fucking people the man loved a firing squad he killed a shit ton of fucking people but as for the way the story goes is he would take them up

in his helicopter and he would either shoot them in the head before he threw them or just throw them straight out but it was to send a message or a warning to the other communists of this is what will happen to you but the only source for it was his helicopter pilot now if he's thrown it out above cities and everything as a warning, someone's going to see it. If you're throwing it above a city, people might go why is my car absolutely fucking obliterated by a dead guy just lying in the middle of it? Someone would have said

something so he'd see how the whole instead he lined them up and shot them he lined them up and shot them but as for the helicopter thing, turns out that's all just a lot of shit it was apparently some shady shit. It would be wildly inefficient. It would take so much fuel to just be like, oh my God, we're losing the battle

because of the amount of helicopter fuel we're spending. Pinochet is a man who has his own sort of sadistic style, I imagine. He was all about fascism, that guy. He was the reason cocaine like fucking exploded because cocaine what was it what was he again he was chile he was chile but basically a lot of the cocaine production was down there right but not not not a lot of people had like the connections to get it like to europe america blah blah blah it was mostly you know

little small timetime connections. But then, basically, whenever they came across a drug compound, everyone got lined up and shot. There was no trial, no fuck-all, you were dead. And so they decided to go, maybe we'll move to another country where there's maybe some kind of due process instead of just us immediately, as soon as we're caught,

we're forced to dig our own graves. Like that type of shit. So they ended up going up to fucking Colombia and that's when they ended up meeting with fucking Pablo Escobar and all the other people and that's how they had the connections because they already had smuggling routes into America

and that's how cocaine became big. So you've got penis shit to fucking thank for that and also the CIA. Couldn't have done it without the CIA Yeah of course That's interesting I feel like I'm learning a lot tonight I know so much useless information

that's all I talk about on my channel Here is some shit that will better your life in no way for the next hour Tell women this on Tinder. They love it. Well, there's a market for the red pill women thing now. You can get on the Andrew Tate grind

and get a bunch of views that way. You know what's new along those lines? Kyle, I got a thing. You mind? They've come up with a male contraceptive pill. Like there's a pill for guys that's in late FDA trials. And I thought it was pretty interesting. I'll give the link to you guys.

You can see it too. There have been a number of attempts at a male pill for some time now, but it always fucks with your testosterone. And I think this aspect of it is interesting in that it makes guys moody and like there's mood swings and maybe pimples or something else i forget what it was like the female one yeah like the female one but for guys they deem that an unacceptable side effect because guys don't get pregnant the threshold for what an acceptable side effect is is lower. But should it be?

Do couples get pregnant or do women get pregnant? Women get pregnant. So you agree with the doctors. There are some people who feel like this is the patriarchy with its foot on the back of women's necks. It's the opposite of that. Women get pregnant. She's the one who decides if she stays pregnant. She's the one who gets to decide whether we check that box from

fetus to baby she decides when that happens my biggest problem with a male pill my biggest problem with the male pill is i don't like the idea of about to enter a woman and she looks up to me and says oh have you got a condom and then i have to look her in the eye and say it's okay i'm on the hill i would just immediately feel like a giant pussy she would instantly dry up she would she would call me a taxi or something manly and no i couldn't say that i mean the problem with that is no no woman in the world should ever believe a man who tells you he's on the pill well that goes both ways. But this thing that I remember this quote from the article, since men do not have to suffer the consequences of pregnancy, the threshold for side effects from the birth

control pill is pretty low. That's why we're trying to develop a non-hormonal birth control pill to avoid hormonal side effects. And I'm not an expert in this, but apparently they found out that like semen production is somehow tied to vitamin A. So they found a specific vitamin A blocker. I don't know what other effects this has. That's freaky.

You need vitamin A for something. I don't know what you need it for, but I trust that you do because you can buy a pill. I guarantee it's necessary for something important. Maybe sperm production. Yeah, that's it. But anyway, yeah, they found that, like, you can – vitamin A is a nutrient, important division, growth, cell division, reproduction, and immunity.

Well, anyway. Yeah, immune system and vision and your skin as well. They're finding that the side effects are pretty chill. I don't know. Maybe this will be – maybe 10 years from now they'll find that there's more and it's a way for guys to not be fertile without having like mood swings and the fucking depression pills that women suffer what's the use case for this for this product who's the man who's like ah great just guys who guys who like raw dogging without being dads that's a quarter of the podcast right now. That's true.

No, no, no. That's the desired effect, but how are we ever going to make that be a thing? The woman's not going to trust you. Kyle, there are some people having sex with people they trust. Well, no. What Kyle is saying is that

don't ever trust any man who tells you he's on the pill. What if you live with him? What if you're married to him so it doesn't so kyle okay so we're talking so now it's for married men so that's a very niche market of married men who are like i'm not gonna take a they're not gonna they're not gonna take the pill no one's gonna hold on the core point of it and kyle's right men wouldn't take the pill is that the reason that women are more likely to take the pill is that they physically bear the brunt of the child bearing so there's like a real threat of I will be pregnant.

I need to take this. Men, that's ancillary to them, especially if they're just having a hookup or something. They weren't concerned before. They're going to go through extra steps to do it now. Like I don't see the use. Yeah. In the hookup market, there's a lot of complications going on. There's also STDs that you're trying to avoid that might make you want to take condoms that or there's trust issues involved but this person is new to you but there are tons of people in committed relationships who don't want a baby right now maybe they want one in the future maybe they've had their boy and their girl and they just don't want babies anymore so guys are looking at a non-surgical option for infertility,

or women are looking at an option that doesn't involve depression and mood swings and weight gain and all that bullshit. Vasectomy seems better than taking a pill forever. It's a terrible idea. If you're the kind of person who's in, let's just say, a committed relationship, but it is not time to have a child, or one of you does not want children. What we're talking about is ruining some people's lives with a child because you know, there's no going back, right? I mean, there is, but we're pretending that she's not going to have this child that wants the child once she's impregnated,

that's it. We're having a child, right? You shouldn't be trusting one form of birth control anyway. Like, like sure. Add this to the pile pile if you mix but a man should never trust this for his primary birth control and a woman should never trust this as as her primary form of birth control and so there's no purpose for this there's going to be no women who are like why couldn't it be even that scenario it sounds like you want more than one berry oh sure well i mean that's one of them i mean i would never take it i would never take that pill and potentially mess with my hormones even a little bit. It doesn't do that. They say it doesn't.

I don't know what the consequences of that are. I don't know what the consequences of tampering with my vitamin A are. I know that we measure my vitamin A with a comprehensive blood test every couple months, and if it's off, it's going to be a problem. Now, Kyle, riddle me this. If your vitamin A came back as zero, would Derek be concerned? Yes!

No, but Kyle, it's only for cell division. I need cells! Maybe it cures cancer. But what I'm saying is this is a product with no good market because no men are like, ooh, I'll go to the doctor

and ask about fucking blanks. The pill that makes me cheat blanks, whatever trendy name they're going to give this nonsense. No. No guy's ever going to do that. And no woman is going to If it's a product that people want to take, then whatever they can take it. i just personally oh i'm not gonna i'm not stopping people from

taking i'm just a stupid fucking product i don't think any of us care about it that way it's just like i look at it and i'm like this is a product with no market at least a great product but there's no there's no direct market for it because in a couple scenario or a hookup scenario the woman is going to be the one who principally wants to do this and so there will be an understood norm that the woman is still the one who takes primary responsibility with birth control like women know that they have to do that because guys don't deal with the brunt of it so they're more lax with it you know what if the guy doesn't want to trust the woman what if the guy thinks oh she could baby trap me yeah he wears a condom yeah he'd wear a condom

you have to wear a condom if you're fucking a woman who might baby trap you anyway what lies are you gonna weave that are gonna prevent get me to take that condom off wear a condom if before you're about to fuck you're like man i need to go through this set of procedures to ensure this unstable bitch doesn't ruin my life you need to not you shouldn't be there and just as much so like and it's not just that like we're viewing this from the viewpoint of like man i would hate to have to like pay child support but there's plenty of women this will ruin your fucking life too like like have have a kid at 22 and have that guy like disappear and send you a check for 1500 every month and see how the rest of your life goes yeah that's gonna be a

rough trajectory i like that guy that i was talking about, that black guy who gives dating advice. Women call and they ask, what do men want? I want this kind of man. How do I get that kind of man? And he breaks it down. We ain't dead. The guy you sent me, I Googled him. He died of a heart attack less than a year ago. Are you serious? Yeah. Samuels, whatever his name is. Look him up. He died of a heart attack less than a year ago. Are you serious? Samuels, whatever his name is. Look him up. He died? He died of a heart attack. He was like 52.

Who's the bodybuilder who's making videos three times a week? I'm watching so many of his videos right now. One after another. Rocky Mountain something? Oh yeah, Rocky Mountain Fitness. Mountain Dog. Mountain Dog. right now like one after another rocky mountain something or oh yeah rocky mountain mountain dog yeah that guy's got more content than ever he's not even slowing down he was talking to a um this woman who um who had a kid she was like i don't know 30 35

average looking lady with like a 10 year old son. And she's like, yeah, I'm looking for a husband. He's like, no, you're looking for a stepfather. Like, well, I want both. Well, first and foremost, though, you're looking for a stepfather and like, and like broke all that stuff down. And it's really remarkable when he asked what their expectations are from, um, a man, like, like what they're looking for. And I want a man who does this, that, and the other. Okay. So you want a man who does this, that, and the other. Okay, so you want a rich man. No!

You just said you wanted $2.5 million worth of kids. You want a very rich man. Now, 2% of men, you want a black man, right? Okay, 1% of men. That's true. Half of rich people are black. He's playing fast and loose with the math well he's breaking down how the percentage of black men who make the money that she's talking about and then he says okay so that's five percent of of of the men in the world that's who you're going after who's going going after that 5% of men? Who's your competition? It's younger, better looking, fitter women without a 10-year-old son that he's going

to have to be feeding. He's like, I look at that kid, you know what I think? You know what I really think? I think if I have kids with you, you want more kids, right? Yeah, two or three more. I think that every dollar that goes into your kid's mouth is a dollar that doesn't go into my son's mouth. I think that your little crumb grabber is going to be running around anytime I want to get physical with you. There he is. That little crumb grabber is. I want to go on vacation, fly you somewhere. Crumb grabber got to come too.

He just breaks all that down. And it's just like, she's like, yeah, I guess. Well, what can I do? I would start by losing about 30 pounds oh my god that's the one you sent me where she's like he's like so how tall are you 5 11 he's like what do you weigh it's like she's like 190 and she's she's more than 190 and he's like they're talking and at one point he's like you weigh 200 pounds she's like 190 and he's she's more than 190 and he's like they're talking and at one point he's like you weigh 200 pounds she's like 190 and he's like that's a sandwich and a big shit like

and like uh at one point he's like give yourself after he did that breakdown that kyle laid out he's like so what are you cut take your body out of the equation just face give yourself a one to ten fresh out of the shower yeah you're wet you look in that mirror what are you you cannot say a seven and she goes i'm an eight and he goes without missing a beat he goes beyonce's an eight and like he's like he goes beyonce's an eight kelly rowland's a nine, and Rihanna's a ten, even with her big head. And he shut her down really well. I mean, obviously, it was another one of those situations where it's like, oh, here's someone who professionally talks on camera versus someone who doesn't professionally talk on camera.

You can take an expert in something, put them on camera, and one of us retards who does this for a living could walk circles around him if that's like you know what i mean like it doesn't mean we were right if you find an awkward enough historian i'll be in a debate about rome and i can barely spell it but if he's awkward enough he's very good more my favorite encounters um this lady said bring me any deaf physicist i'll humiliate him he's signing at me i'm like i don't know what you're saying being unbelievably just add a hominid attack you would say that you're a physicist yeah you would say that wow it's harping about the speed of light nothing about the speed of

sound from this guy. He said something about her weight, and she said, I'm going to go. He said, you need to go to the gym. And he sort of makes this point. He's like, when was the last time you were in a size four dress? She's like, elementary school. He said, so you see, this is it. We've peaked right here.

We're not going to magically get back to elementary school fitness. That ain't going to happen. So here we are. You're an average woman. I give you a six. You're a six. All right. You're cute. All right. You are. You are cute. You know what a six gets? A six. You know what a six is? Average. You know what an average black man makes? Forty two thousand one hundred dollars a year. So you need to be looking for a man that makes forty two thousand dollars a year because that's what you are. She's like, but I've got a master's degree and he plays a sound effect. And it's somebody it's a different girl when I'm a Ph.D. We don't care. We don't care. He's like, I've got the kind of man you're looking for is a wealthy man. I am a wealthy man. I don't care about your degree. Why would I care about your degree?

You're going to come work? You think I'm sending you to a job? No, I want somebody to make my life peaceful. And he talks about what he wants from a woman. You know who said that really well? Derek on More Plates, More Dates said it on the J. Rogan Experience. They were talking about, they didn't use the word, but they were talking about women's

sexual market value and how when a woman is professionally successful, Derek was like, that's almost like a negative to me. He's like, I'm professionally successful. I'm looking for a support system. Someone who's there to help me, lift me up, support me emotionally and whatever. He didn't use all these words, but efficiency, run the house, whatever it is. He's like, if this woman is a doctor, then she's got her own thing going on. I'm not looking for someone who's got her own thing going on. I'm looking for someone who wants to partner with me on my thing.

It's a very interesting position that he takes with his videos. And it's not like he's going to some university and owning the libs. He has a radio show for women call in who want to know, how do I get a man like you? Because RIP, by the way, really good looking guy and like really well put together. I don't know what his profession is,

but he seems to be wealthy. Like he seems well to do. Kevin Samuels. We're talking about. Yeah. Yeah. The, the,

the black gentleman. Um, and, uh, there's one interaction he had and the lady's like well you know um i thought maybe i could get an older man the kind of man who he can't get those 25 year old women he's like i'm 52 i can't beat him off with a stick it's just good stuff all right peter that guy damn i can't believe i just discovered a new

youtuber that i enjoy and he's dead. Yeah, I didn't know until you sent me him that I looked him up, but we can jump back to whatever, but before we do, we're going to hear from a couple of wonderful sponsors. Before we do that, I'm going to get a drink. Go for it. This episode of PKA brought to you by

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a bottle to a couple months ago and it was someone who doesn't live here anymore and so he came back in town and he was like, oh, that cum stuff you make? Holy shit, dude. He said that and I was like, I know I can trust you because he would have come back and he would have told me, that shit's bull.

He's taking nine pills for nothing. No, it works works so code jizz or code pka for 10 off also you can get any of the protein powders any of the pre-workouts i would have demanded a sample taylor you can't trust that guy i'm just i'm just laughing at the fact that you had a friend that came back and went dude i come so much well when you're in the jizz biz, you try and help your friends out. We're going to send you something. You're going to be just absolutely soaked. Oh no, my stuff's on ice. Me and my wife do IVF.

My stuff's on ice. I've had to come into the jar and hand it to the nurse awkwardly. It does not increase your sperm count. It increases your of of seminal fluid and shit he doesn't want to mess with the cocktail he's on it so you went to the i'm sorry we're interrupting our own edge you went to the the fertility place jerked off in a little office and then handed it over yeah no no magazines no, no TV, no nothing. I had to connect to their Wi-Fi on my fucking phone

because there was no signal. And I just went, what is the weirdest fucking hentai that I can look up to have their sysadmin fucking freak out? And I was like, shit, man. I just Googled pictures. I think I literally went, porn, what do I do again? And I went on to Google and typed in, like, big boobs. And just, like, went in and laid images.

And I was shit, because I don't fucking know. A child. Like a barbarian. But I ended up, like, I had to come out. I had to, like, come out. And the problem is, is you come out into a waiting room of everyone who knows you've just had a wank. And not everyone's there for a

wank there's women there as well and they tell you if there's no nurse keep the jar in your armpit to keep the sperm warm and all that so i was just sitting with like a jug of cum in my armpit for like five minutes and nobody came so i went outside for a smoke and other than then the nurse came and went where is he and people in the waiting room went he's outside smoking and she was not fucking happy with me she was like really upset and like in the car park i'm just handing over like a jar of cum i've done this twice i yeah yeah when so we had hope really quickly but for colin there was this delay it turned out it was on my wife's side a little foul up with the c-section. But we didn't know why we weren't having a kid, so we got me tested. The first time I go in there, and they gave me like a jar to take home.

And they're like, wank in this thing, drive straight over, and do the thing. And the test went well, but I guess they do it more than once. And they're like, yeah, so here's a little sample collector. You can go home, do whatever. And I'm like, don't you have like wank banks right here? And they're like, yeah, we here's a little sample collector. You can go home, do whatever. And I'm like, don't you have like Wank Banks right here? And they're like, yeah, we do, but you can go home. And I'm like, nah. I don't have a trip.

I'm here already. You know, like I'm good to go. And, you know, you have to like abstain for two or three days. But so I was ready. I wasn't ready to abstain longer. Like I did. Let's go right now. I'm all pent up. I'm ready. I'm a finely tuned athlete and i'm peaking today so uh so they put

me in a little wank bank and there were magazines there worn out pages missing folded where folds don't belong like these oh many men these were slut magazines that men had passed between them. I'm talking about the magazines themselves, not the pictures. The women were lovely, I'm sure. But the magazines, they were passed from guy to guy to guy. The things I've seen. Those magazines could talk.

They'd have one story to tell again. I like the fact that pages were folded as if someone wanted to keep their place. I'll be back. Yeah. Continue. Someone was manhandling these magazines. Were they stored up in a tube at a point? I don't know.

When I got out there, this is the part I didn't like. I've got my sample and there's a nurse behind a counter. I didn't have to wait. They were ready for me. She goes, okay. I'm like, right here in ready for me. She goes, Okay. Right here in front of me. You're checking up. She might have to be like, Did you miss?

No matter how much I gave, I would go out with a comment like that. Even if it's not a drop miss. It's all over the toilet seat sorry it looks like ghostbusters in here you know confident with that cup of coffee you guys be like i got it it's the cum they expect you to be in there for a long time maybe like some people because it's a fucking weird place to do that so you'd have time if you wanted to get like a couple loads out you could they look

a lot at your um like the density of it like i don't think they count every sperm yeah they just want to know like a sub sample i think i wonder if you put a second and third load in there if it would hurt your numbers oh fuck you're right. Are you thinking that those later loads won't be as dense? I'll bring some. I am, but I'm not a scientist. I'm just a guy really good at masturbating. Well,

your first pass of the day is the one that's supposed to get tested. I think so. They have you save up for a couple of days, and I think your first load is your best effort. If you told me, Woody, we're going to run a 100 meter dash, but run three of them to get the best time

possible. It's like, bro, trust me, they get worse and worse. That's a good comparison. You're right. I'm glad you guys talked me off that ledge before I made a fool of myself at the sperm clinic. I just go there. He's been in there for 45 minutes.

I heard you. It took me a while because I kept getting put off because it's just a little shitty doctor's wooden door. I could hear everyone's conversations in the waiting room. I'm sort of sitting there like that. I don't give a fuck if you're going to fucking Rachel's

barbecue at the weekend I don't want to fucking hear about this I don't want to go, oh but we have to go because I said we'd go I'm trying to have a wank You're like yelling from the room Talk about your pussies Shut the fuck up I'm trying to get this office

I'm trying to get out of here Talk about your tits I'm spinning barbecue fantasies in my head Come on Get this office out of here. Talk about your tits. I'm spinning barbecue fantasies in my head. Come on. I think you guys are masturbating at a lower level than me. I don't think you have my subject matter expertise on this. I could totally spin her conversation. You sound like you sit there with headphones in,

listening to whale song at the right time. It must be exactly 68 hertz to achieve like peak have you ever seen that old king of the hill where hank has to give sperm and the the doctor's like mr hill would you like any visual aid and he's like oh yes if you have popular mechanics i'd appreciate it you have to masturbate in the cup. Yeah, but he has horrible sperm. That's part of his character to overcome.

What? Oh yeah, King of the Hill is coming back. I hope that Mike Judge has a lot to do with it. I hope that he's still the writer, the main, the head honcho. Because so much of King of the Hill is his brainchild. It's the brainchild of Mike Judge. So as long as he's super involved, it'll be good.

I'm curious about how they'll handle... Will the characters be ageless like the Simpsons? Do they just come back and Bobby's still a little kid? I hope so. And Joseph is 13. He just hit puberty still. Is Lady Bird still a fucking live? Or are we catching up

and Bobby's like junior propane salesman Dad I'm trans now Bobby you're not doing that liberal stuff in my house that is my purse that's good that's good so I hope that it's the exact same world

that's funny that's funny I hope it's the same fucking thing I want it to be reminiscent of the old show it's such like a feel good show for me I want the characters to be the same I liked how basic it was and yet still just utterly funny like the simpsons had this whole homer accidentally got abducted by aliens and then became the u.s president like all this wacky shit whereas there

was a whole episode of the king of the hill of hank trying to figure out who kept putting their trash in his bin and it was a funny fucking episode at all it's fucking it was a lot more ground is yeah more yeah yeah they they seemed like real people some of the time and uh and that's that that's pretty damn good a lot of characters are dead it's a good way not a lot but several of the characters are dead now the voice actors oh really who else other than i mean luan died in the middle of the run um what's his name the the one that the musician um that was in like so many episodes i can't remember who it was not one of the core four main guy oh uh the guy who's the like walmart um yeah it's like a person in there something like that um oh i thought it was luann's boyfriend he was it was him it was that that

loses it luann always dated. It doesn't matter since she's dead. But yeah, I look forward to seeing the show again. I haven't seen it forever. I don't rewatch it, though. Chuck Mangione. Yeah. I don't ever.

Chuck Mangione was the one always playing the trumpet or whatever. He was the mega low mart. Yeah. Sponsor or spokesperson. I don't know. I honestly don't long for it or anything um i i i thought it was okay watching it but i've never gotten obsessed with it like re-watched it over and over the way i have so many other shows uh oh woody did you finish for all mankind

i've uh the first half of season two is where i am okay okay yeah still highly recommend that show to anybody who hasn't seen it i've watched it all there's three seasons out on apple tv it's so fucking good i really like it and and you mentioned that they so for people don't know this show starts i think in like the 50s or 60s definitely the 60s and uh seven i think that's seven 69 landing on the moon areas that is about where it started i think you're right so's any case I'm in the eighties now and they age the characters so well. And like some characters age hot,

like Gordo's wife, for example, and Ed, the, the dude, some characters gain weight. I don't know. I don't know that good with names.

Is the black Gordo, Danielle Gordo gains weight Is the black woman Danielle? Gordo gains weight. And the black woman who broke her arm? Yeah, yeah, yeah. She didn't age hot. And the aging is so convincing. And I don't know that I've ever seen it done this well.

For me, anyway. I don't know. It's working for me. Maybe I'm watching it on my computer screen. But I don't even know what age the actors really were i can't tell which ones were the real actors and which ones have been aged it's so effective on me i'm surprised to hear you say that because it wasn't good to you i feel like it's some of the worst i've ever seen because they all look the same i'm like gordo looks wildly different so they took their time on

gordo i almost feel like gordo was like can i gain 50 pounds y'all i mean if you want to but we weren't thank you so much i've always had to get paid to do this i think gordo's gonna lose weight because i thought i saw like a hint of fat suit on his belly in this one scene that i don't want to yo-yo okay yeah look here's the thing. Especially with, there's a main character. She's the wife of the main astronaut, Ed's wife. Ed and Karen, what you're talking about. So Karen, as a character, never ages. They just make her hair a little grayer every 15 years. And so, like, I've finished season three. She's, it's 95, so she's

about 60. She is so hot. Dude, but Ed is too. 28. She's one where maybe I feel like they chose some characters to age into. There's a rare guy.

Who's the doctor from er he's really famous actor stamos but he's a good example this guy uh george clooney i'm looking for george clooney the way that he aged he just seemingly got older and more handsome like it was really good um there's one of the characters on the show they did that for him I'm like, he got a hookup. He got a better haircut. I remember my girlfriend was like, he got a better haircut. I was like, yeah, he's way better looking in his make-believe late 30s

than he was in his make-believe mid-20s. I agree, yeah. I think I see him over 40 now. I'm not doing the age very well. He looks 60-something. And all they do is they give him a short haircut so you can see a more pronounced balding pattern, although he's got all this hair.

And then they do this sort of sallow cheek thing where they make his cheeks a little dark, like in there, to make him look a little sunken. But that just makes him look more athletic. And this isn't a huge spoiler i hope you don't mind me saying this i know you won't he starts doing trt in the third season every now and then they cut to him and he's got a syringe in his ass that's funny other characters like you're shooting up anabolics left and right and he's like stay on mission

yeah it doesn't matter he needs some fucking trt dude 60 going on space missions so i've learned about aging uh that sallow cheek thing humans lose fat in their face as they get older even as they gain fat right i heard it called fat i'm not sure you could be well you that's a different thing um they actually lose fat like there's puffiness under their cheeks that migrates like and it's not a good look um but the thing is on guys it's not such a bad look like you know you sort of get high cheekbones and a cut face and guys can age in that sallow thing and not look bad for women it's almost never a positive improvement you know he's got the most sallow face?

Lance Armstrong. When he was doing his thing, and there's no fat left on that fucking bone, and his face was just chiseled. Not that he had a great jawline or some perfect look. It was just, God, there's nothing left on his face. He's peddled it all away. He gave it away for those thighs.

A guy with no fat in his face can look pretty good. I don't think that always works for girls, especially when their skin loses elasticity. You see UFC fighters cutting weight. Sometimes on weigh-in day, they look really handsome, even if they're not handsome every day. Chael Sonnen used to look really good on weigh-in day. Really chiseled. Yeah, Chael did.

Chael still looks good, and he looks powerful. Chael still works out. Yes. He talks about it too he talks about he's training with professional fighters now I think the fire is going a little bit now he's just keeping in shape by sure yeah yeah and I'm sure it's like it's great to rub elbows

with people who are like plugged directly into the business he's trying to report on so there's a fight coming up I think it's not this next one but maybe the one after it it's definitely the the not the next but the next after that big fight and it's the i'm gonna call it the fuck you nate diaz card because here's what the ufc has done the ufc has nate diaz and the ufc hate each other last time they had a meeting nate walked out of it and pissed on their lawn outside and then photographers took pictures been pissed on the lawn he's like yeah because fuck them that's why i and pissed on their lawn outside. And then photographers took pictures of him pissing on the lawn. And he's like, yeah, because fuck them.

That's why I'll piss on their lawn. And so they're like, okay, one more fight left on your thing. You're going to fight. Can I pause there? Yeah. So a lot of times when a fighter has one more fight and if I have one more fight left, I can redo my contract now showing loyalty to the UFC. I can hope to win it, bet on myself, and redo the contract. I've really got an advantageous position. I am a world beater. You gave me a

tough fight. I won. I need a new contract. I'm in a good position to get a better one. That's not what Nate's doing. Nate's going to finish his contract. He's going to call out Jake Paul or something like that. He's leaving. He's leaving the box. He's leaving the box. He feels like there's more money outside the UFC. So the UFC wants to use his big name and boost up some guy who's not leaving the UFC. You take him there. That's some of it. But what the UFC wants to do is they want to embarrass Nate Diaz on his way out.

They want him to get an absolute beating. So they have found the most powerful guy that they could possibly match up with him. And it even makes sense. Like, it barely does. Like, everybody's saying what I'm saying, that they're leading Nate Diaz to slaughter. This is about embarrassing Nate Diaz and beating him in front of as few people as possible because they have removed everyone from that card that you've ever heard of.

And if you look at the card after that, it's a killer because all the guys that were on Nate's card have been pushed on over there. It's like, oh yeah, we want those fights to happen. We're a business. But not on Nate's card, because he gets a dollar a pay-per-view. Or two dollars a pay-per-view.

Whatever it is. He gets points. They're ruining the pay-per-view for Nate. They're going to make that card as shit as possible and fuck him out the door. It's going to be like Nate Diaz on the card. Shamalov? Is that pronounced his name? And then like a bunch of people you hadn't heard of like fetch.

Pull up the card. Like, look at it. Like, like, like, look, I'm not like I'm not to the point where I know the top 10 guys in every division, but I'll know their names if I hear them. Like I couldn't rattle them off, but you say, I mean, yeah, that guy. Oh, yeah. Oh, I remember him. He fought so and so the people that are on this Nate Diaz

card, it's a real shit card. Johnny Walker, I know, but nobody else. Johnny Walker was kind of a big deal about six years ago, five years ago when people thought he could beat Jon Jones, but then he lost on the way to Johnny.

Oh, my gosh. I follow UFC more than most people. There are a bunch of people on this card that don't even have profile pictures. Yeah. I was looking at the player unknown over there coming out of Russia. I don't know who Dennis Tully Johnny,

but we haven't unlocked that character yet. And look at the heavyweights that they're using. They're using their fat heavyweights that are unranked. Look at Chris Barnett. He looks like a 265 pounder, like one of those jobbers. He's from Spain? Who is this guy? Never heard of the guy. No idea. And then leading

the night off, these guys, these unranked, never heard of them. Here's another player unknown out of Mexico. A lot of times when someone decides if they're gonna pay for a card they're looking for more than one fight they care about yeah oh absolutely it's a top line card matters a lot but i really want to see two or maybe even three belts on i'm the extended version of that i'm gonna be there all night i get there for the early prelims at 5 36 p.m i'll like get my like popcorn and my soda or whatever like dim the lights like i'm here for the night i'm here for five hours of fighting

me too and i'm not gonna click by when i get to that portion of the night if there's not at least three fights on there i care about a little that are consequential in their division is a way it's what i mean by fights i care about too because like where's somebody you care about on your tv like oh there's plenty of people that i'm like i root for like like i wouldn't care if it's on the undercard i gotta get in there to see or against i just want to care yeah i don't care about that card in the slightest that is that is that is them fucking nate diaz and it's so transparent it's weird that they do that i guess they feel like won't impact our business we'll just have a big card before and a big card after. I would like to know, and I never will, the real amount of money collected by people who are UFC friends and UFC enemies. Nate Diaz got paid. He's getting pay-per-view,

right? He's had a lucrative career. Same with his brother, Nick. But they both hated the UFC. Nick left the UFC and fought at Strikeforce for quite some time, his older brother. I'm trying to think of other examples who really had to fuck the UFC. And then you get a guy. Tito Ortiz. Tito's a great example. Yeah, yeah.

And then you get a guy like Daniel Cormier, right? He was the UFC guy. Mighty Mouse, yeah. Daniel Cormier is a really good example. He never didn't play hardball on the contract. His contract didn't pay him very much. And then Dana would bonus him million or millions just because he felt like he earned it. Here's $2 million because that card did great.

I know you're not under contract for this, but we appreciate what you did here and we'll give you two million they would do what was right how does that compare to the people who fuck the ufc i they it might not be as good you know you're leaning on dana white's generosity that's not that's a risky strategy but it is but it sometimes works i think that what you're looking at with nate diaz in particular is a real antagonistic like street person who goes into board meetings with businessmen with fucking charts and demographics and they're like okay we put together this you know when they're getting paid it's not like i'm a contractor coming to paint your house they're like we're gonna pay you this much here this much here this much here there's categories there's balloons that are getting squeezed left and right.

And he's just like, fuck all that. I'm here to fight. And then it's like, no, no, no, Mr. Diaz. We're going to need you to let us know that you're going to be available for all of these media requirements. Nah, fuck that bullshit. Well, all right. Well, that's probably going to affect the pay-per-view numbers over here. And like I said, if you don't hit at least 600,000 buys, then we're talking about a different dollar amount nah fuck all that i want to fight in ghanu

mr ds stop calling me that yo that's my dad it's like motherfucker when conor mcgregor comes he comes with a lawyer and we do business it's expensive but it gets done. Dana talked about that. He's like, I've got guys that are hard to work with. But Conor, once you agree on a deal, he does it. He shows up to all the media events. He does his job.

He says the juice is worth the squeeze. It's a tough squeeze, but it's worth it. Everyone's making money. Conor made a ton of money. Nate, like these other guys, I just it nate's a squeaky wheel did that work out better than it would have in this alternative universe where he was a better worker i don't know he he's not the guy who could be squeaky anymore that he was that guy like like if you could rewind six years on his body like then he can be squeaky but he's done um he if fighting he's done but his ability he, if we're fighting,

he's done, but his ability to draw a crowd, we'll test it. What's going to happen is going to be, and I, my prediction for the fight is that it's going to be very, very bloody and there's going to be a doctor stoppage or there's going to be a submission and we're going to see Nate Diaz stop for the first time. It's going to be,

I don't see it ending either way. I don't know that a human being can knock that man unconscious, but I think that, uh, Kamzak can cut him enough that a doc will stop it. And he can definitely like, I don't know that a human being can knock that man unconscious, but I think that Kamzat can cut him enough that a doc will stop it, and he can definitely, I don't know, break his arm, break his knee, blow his – I don't even know that that man will tap, but that's the guy who will put him in a position where it won't matter afterwards.

He'll either be broken or tapped. Yeah, I see Kamzat winning by submission, but I hadn't considered that nate wouldn't tap dr stoppage yeah it's it's gonna be a doctor stop he's gonna his face is gonna be mangled that kamzat throws those elbows he's so dirty he's got such strong wrestling they're gonna be on the ground this is this is gonna be on the ground it's gonna be nasty and if kamzat wants to like go off plan like like like like he did last time he's still gonna box nate up for a while and cut nate let's say they're equal let's say the younger higher ranked guy is equal to the old dog with

boxing skills this guy's face falls apart that guy's a brand new guy that's got all that fat in college and we were just talking about in abundance right like one guy's face rips apart the other the other stays strong one guy's the old over-the-hill bull with CT and a speech impediment. And the other guy's just a killer. Just a fucking killer. Who's the one with the speech impediment? Taylor, I think you're on the wrong microphone.

It's Nate Diaz that has a speech impediment. He also has a ton of scar tissue on his face, which is, I think, why Kyle's mentioning all the blood he expects to see and when a when a fighter gets all scarred up and heals and cuts and heals and cuts he's just prone to getting ripped open and bleeding he bleeds quickly and like something about like the i would hate to get cut from a punch because we say cut and that's polite because like oh yeah you got cut oh yeah

sharp knife that's what does cuts no you got tore somebody tore your face open somebody tore your face open with a sticky piece of rubber slicing against you real hard it's a terrible wound those are gross i don't usually connect to fighters but i am connected to joe joe lozon sometimes i'd see him about to fight and it's like you know like i i wish i could help but i'm really glad i'm not there i'm really glad that i'm not about to be i you're the one who belongs in the octagon joe i could say that about some hockey players too though because like bringing it back to something that everybody can enjoy um they you know i can imagine i can imagine being like let's say i'm a hockey player and last we're in a three-game series or something,

and last game out I did something dirty, but it was close to the end of the game. There could be no reprisal. And I know that they're hunting me. Maybe they didn't mean to do it, but I hurt the goalie or something. I did some faux pas. I did a hand signal they interpreted as a Nazi salute. I don't know.

But knowing that they're coming, that would be scary. There's a little bit of that in prison too. It seems like getting that warning and having to live with knowing that they're coming is scary. It would be really scary, regardless of the sport.

You get that in baseball too. Although in baseball, it's like, no way you'll throw it at my head. He won't throw it at my head. Would he? Is this the right mic? No, it's not.

It's okay. In high school, I had that. I don't know if you guys ever been called up. And it'll reconnect it. Is this better? No, they're saying refresh. Refresh the web browser page. Have you ever been called out when you knew you had a fight at the bike racks

at the end of the day? When you got to your your bike that fuck was going to be there waiting for you oh yeah oh i knew when the guy that i had i had beef with like i knew like oh man i'm gonna be in construction and he's gonna be an automotive and that means that like i go outside he can just walk right over and fucking jump me like i had a problem with a guy that was like i was 16 and he was 18 and tough break it was a huge difference yeah that's a critical year i had a beard like you didn't say i'm 41 and he's 43 i still can't grow the beard that 18 year old when he shoved me against that fucking like car jack outdoors and threatened me. I can see his blue eyes this close to mine still with him like, I want to do the such and such and such

and such if you such and such and such and me being like, this is scary! Like, I'm a boy! I was so little. I'm sorry, I think my USB thing isn't... Yeah, that's the wrong mic. Maybe if you plug it into a different USB port. I'm not sure you can hear it.

But I've talked about this before. I was riding my bike home and a car pulled over off the street and blocked the sidewalk I was riding my bike on. There were four people in that car and I think

three of them could have beat me 1v1. Now what's my move? And he did this thing where he stood over my front tire and held my handlebars. One, I can't beat him normally. Two, how do I wiggle backwards on my bicycle and get away from this guy who has that grip? It's a tough situation. You need that scenario that you see in movies sometimes where you find a tougher, older kid and you pay him off to come beat that guy's ass. God almighty, if I had known that if there'd been like a 21 year old dude that I could have given $250 and he would have solved that

little problem that I had, oh, I'd have gotten jobs and like my trajectory would have would be completely different today because of all the work experience i would have gotten at 16 to earn enough money to hire a 20 or under year old to beat up my bully i remember thinking like my options are hide fight and get beaten terribly because that's what will happen or like use a weapon like am i gonna hit this guy with a hammer and i and even at 16 i'm like what if i fucking kill him though i don't know how to like i was like i gotta hit him hard enough with this hammer that like he goes away and the fight's over but not so hard that he goes away and we had over we had a mini baseball bat in my house it was like

16 inches long and heavy enough that if you hit someone it would really really hurt them and i'm like what do you really think this makes you win a 1v4 they're gonna hit you you're just in no time at all you're going to hand them a club and morally justify them using it. Let's hope they only hit me with that little bat. I hope they're not kinky. Yeah, you just gave them a fucking anything. It's a dildo if you're mean enough. You don't want to deal with that.

No, it sucks. There's nothing you can do, especially when you're in in that gap or if you're just a little kid like we're talking i think at 18 maybe i could have done something to 20 year old this guy but 16 versus 18 is never going to happen maybe is right yeah maybe versus 20 like god at 18 i was still growing it's closer but he's still killing yeah yeah that's what i would have been with me yeah i mean i mean it's the difference between a guy who's still like worrying about his gym shorts and a guy who's like working a full-time job and like lifting weights after work or something like like this is a man versus a teenager yeah it was for a long time yeah it's no good no the one time in school that i thought a really big guy it was still a fair fight because he had gigantism,

so his bones didn't really work. Wait, he had gigantism? That wasn't an advantage in a fight? No, basically, you can have a gigantism, and you can be a really big guy. He was one of those guys where he was like, this sounds bad, I'm not going to say his name, but anyone that went to school with me will know who I'm talking about.

Who knows among which gigantism. There's only one giant in all of Scotland. He had one of those like big foreheads where you could tell like something's wrong. He was fucking huge, right? He was massive, but he was like slow because he couldn't move, right? He had like one of

those, he had like one big shoe to like make up for like the length of his leg and all that. Basically his body didn't grow, right? Right. And I, and this was the thing. I don't even know. It was such a stupid reason for the fight to fucking start. My dad's a firefighter.

He's retired. He's long retired now. But we were in the queue in the cafeteria, and he turns to me and he says, your dad's a firefighter, isn't he? And I went, aye. And then he just went, and now there's a children's TV show over here called Fireman Sam, right?

It's just a kid's show. He's a fireman. He goes around and fights fires and it's for children, right? And he just goes, ha ha ha, Fireman Sam, right? And I don't know why, but I threw my bag off and just started hitting him. And I don't know why, but I threw my bag off and just started hitting him.

He's hitting me. This is a retarded man with gigantism he's wailing on. No, he wasn't. He wasn't mentally retarded. So high stakes. You said he had a big forehead and he clearly just made a child's joke. He was physically retarded. Would you describe him as a fat-headed retard? Right.

Mentally, he was all retard he went right mentally he was all there he knew what he was doing right he understood the situation right he was just very big and slow he got a few punches in and those punches fucking hot by the way right those were like the first but he got he got me right there on the cheekbone and i was i was lying back on the table at this point because he used his size to just grab me and pin me down. He got a punch in at my face and I was actually like, fuck. And that was when I managed to wriggle away and everything and I was hitting him and we were rolling around

and tables were going everywhere. And then it ended up it got broke up and I get taken up to the rector's office. That's like a superintendent. And he ends up going like, why did you start hitting him? And I thought back going, I don't know. I don't know what happened. that's like a superintendent and he ends up going like why did you start hitting him and i thought back going i don't know i i think he just caught me at like a really bad fucking moment or something man i have no fucking idea but then they do the thing where they force you to shake hands and

then like that's the end of it right but i'm i gave as good as i got but he was like way bigger than me that only advantage was he couldn't really move properly because he was a retard well i mean it seems like your biggest advantage was surprise yeah leapt on the oh no you see when the bag gets thrown off that's go time like that's that's he knew i remember i had some snacks in there for him i want to this i was young call it like 11 years old or something right so it wasn't like deep into He knew. He thought he had some snacks in there for him. I was young. Call it like 11 years old or something.

So it wasn't deep into the fighting. And I was physically better than this kid. But he was picking on me. We weren't in school. We were outside in grass in front of all the houses and everything. And he had a spitball for some reason. He hit me with a spitball. And I i was like i can't just let that go right like i can't pretend this didn't everyone's solid or whatever i get this guy in full mount and i have him pinned down not hitting him or anything and he punches me in the ear and it hurt it didn't just hurt it kind of burned

like it was a special kind of hurt and it like it rang and it and i was like oh well i guess ear pinch ear punches are on the table and i'm in full mount right so i get in like one two and punch both his ears and he starts crying and i'm like well i guess i proved my point you know the fight ended there just with two i didn't hit him in the eyes it didn't pop his nose i guess gave him two ear punches and he's crying and i'm like uh why did you start this but how old was he he was always my age too we were both like i was really hoping you just said a number and i was gonna say oh yeah that was last week last thursday before the show so you see what is one of the greatest punches i ever threw

in my entire life i was immediately followed with one of the most embarrassing moments in my entire life right it was like there was this nightclub that we used to go to like every single weekend right and it was kicking out time and kicking out time is always the nervous time that's when that's when shit always happens and there was four guys. This was happening further down the street. There was four guys beating the shit out of a friend of mine. So we all went, what the fuck? We all ran down to help.

I'm drunk as fuck though. But immediate adrenaline. Oh, fucking here we go. I'm sprinting down the street now. It's been raining. It's been raining. I'm sprinting down the street now it's been raining it's been raining, I'm sprinting down the street and I'm I run and it's like a full force

I'm running at full pelt and the guy even turns around and I'm just like boom and he fucking spins and it was like a fucking anime I hit him and he fucking spins it was the best punch i've ever thrown

he was out like he was snoring after that right i wouldn't have done that if it wasn't four of them versus like my one friend right but ended up as soon as i've done it i slipped and fell right on my arse and i'm running at full speed so i'm just sliding down the street i like arrived at the fight and then immediately left on my arse sliding down the street it rips my fucking jeans open and my arse cheeks get shredded like the fucking bitch

so I got up and like the fight the guys have like ran away because about like fucking 8 guys ran down to like fucking get these guys for beating up a friend and fucking like everyone's like that looking me, and I turned around and just went, is it bad? Everyone, all my friends,

everyone outside the nightclub are all just laughing because the back part of my jeans is gone. I now have just assless chaps. My two arse cheeks are sticking out the jeans, and they're just bleeding like fuck with like stones stuck in them

and shit from like when I slid down and I had to fucking go home and everything and the worst part was I had to sit in a taxi with like leather seats but we had to like hide it from the taxi driver yeah so I'm sitting there

with like my bloody arse on these leather seats and I'm like anyway thanks my bloody arse on these leather seats. And I'm like, anyway, thanks very much, pal. And just getting out, just knowing he's got arse blood all over the back of his taxi. And he's going to pick someone else up. So some poor people that night were sitting in my arse blood. Man, that must have been such a roller coaster of emotions to feel that hardcore and badass and then to be demonstrably humiliated in front of yeah but i imagine most scotland

the lord the lord gave us injury though like like like like i would i've never like had an ass injury uh i uh well i decided to get into one yes you have both of you guys are ass injury veterans i got into one of those um like like a metal cart i went down an asphalt hill in a metal cart one time and landed on my back and like slid on my spine a little bit and just like took it took the skin you could see the vertebrae it's like no skin where the vertebrae are on my lower back and uh that sucked but not nearly as much as what he's describing that's awful no the other the only other arse injury that I've had is fucking... I broke my tailbone skateboarding.

That was fucking horrible. That was so horrible, man. You hear that's one of the worst ones. That was like, you go to the hospital and they just go... They'll x-ray it and see if the position, like the bone's broken, is really bad. That's when they need to operate but mine was still where it was supposed to be but it was fucking broke right and they basically just go here's a shit ton of painkillers buy yourself an inflatable rubber ring and it was

like a year of you can't sit directly down on your ass you're always like leaning to one side like all the pressure is on like the back a year a year of that jesus christ it was fucking terrible but the worst part right and the worst part was this happened in school right so i was what happened was i was skateboarding i like went up on the ramp like my trucks caught and it was a big ramp and i just fell backwards and my body made like a v-shape like an arrowhead and the tip of the arrowhead was my arse and it just hit the concrete and I felt it like pop. It was fucking horrible but ended up... See

one thing they don't tell you about is anytime you cough or sneeze, all the muscles in your body like tense up and see when they tense up down there it's fucking excruciatingly sore. It hurts so fucking much. See, when you're sitting there and you feel yourself a bit of sneeze you're like oh no

oh no no no it just fucking hurts right the only way to stop it from hurting is to stand up like perfectly poker straight clench your arse muscles as tight as you can and then cough or sneeze and that's the only way that you could stop it

and it happened to me in school so I'm in the middle of class having to stand up and sit back down and everyone started calling me sergeant because i'm having to fucking stand to attention anytime i wanted to cough or sneeze that fucking sucked that was a fucking horrible injury man i mean sergeant is as good as you can hope for for an ass like they picked on the least embarrassing part of that whole process yeah they did do the whole oh you need you need to like have a rubber ring when you sit down in school and i went no i will lean to the side and when that leg gets tired i will lean to the other and like i am gets tired, I will lean to the other. I am not going in there with a rubber ring because I know exactly what everyone's going to say.

Oh, yeah. You can't come back from that. No. Bringing a rubber ring. That took a really fucking long time to heal by the way. Even for a few years after it, sometimes when I would just be sitting down normally, it would get sore and I would have to stand up and walk around.

That was shit. That took such a long time to fucking heal. You think that's your worst injury ever? Probably. I have been stabbed before. How did that happen? How and why?

It was while I was on a date. Was it with your own girlfriend? No, no. It was a girl. I was single, and it was a girl that I had a bit of an interest in. And basically, we went to the local Asda, which is like our Walmart, and we were just getting some sweets and crisps and stuff like that, and we were going to go watch films. This was in was in the days of DVDs though so it wasn't

Netflix and chill I was I was basically going to hope to look at the DVD symbol bouncing around the screen you know that that type of thing but uh it's a long story I'm not going to go into the full history but there was a guy that I had a long running problem with right basically he he would get me I would get him he would get me, I would get him, he would get me, I would get him. A bit of a rival. Yeah. So I'm just sitting outside Asda, just talking to her,

and she jumped and shouted, Marcus, and I went, what? Not realizing there was a guy, he was running up behind me, and I felt like he punched me in the side. But it was like when someone taps your shoulder and you turn that way, but they've ran the other way. So I felt me in the side right but it was like was like when someone taps your shoulder and you turn that way but they've ran the other way so i felt this in my side i turned that way but he'd ran that way and i turned around and as soon as i saw the back of his head i knew who it was i thought he punched me like i thought he'd fucking punch me so i'm sitting shouting at him like fucking like giving him powders and then my fucking great but like uh she then starts like screaming and i just look down and you just see

like blood just like soaking my shirt and everything i left grab the injury like how did he get you it was it was a screwdriver it was a screwdriver that he got me away but the way it was is like see if it went straight in like say that that's my stomach if it went in like that then i was in like serious trouble but he got me at like an angle so it was just all flesh it was all flesh so it was like somehow both deep and shallow like there was a long injury but yeah i follow it could have been really bad if you got it straight in then it could have been really fucking bad but it went in my side and like to the front of my stomach it was all just fat and everything that it had and the thing was is i didn't know what to do so i looked down at it and i looked up at the girl and i just started laughing oh man and i just said and she's freaking out and i'm like

calm down calm down calm down it's fine it's fine it's fine so what did you do did you get real medical attention or just apply pressure and heal people i put pressure on it and people ran out of asda like freaking out and everyone going oh my god someone's just been stabbed and everyone then fucking but then like ended up like i get taken in an ambulance the cops talked to me i didn't tell the cops shit because yeah if you if you do it could be a lot worse but it ended up like i did say to the girl like i need to go to hospital uh i had a great time though. Maybe we should do this again, like making all the usual jokes. She never spoke to me again.

Because I'm starting to explain the situation. People are going, oh, that's a guy I've got a problem with. This happens sometimes. We're in a prank war. If you date me, it'll never be boring. Damn. Just casually got stabbed.

It's a very, very common thing in Scotland. It was actually really fucking bad here for a very long time. It got to the point where if you got caught with a knife, it was six months mandatory sentence. No ifs, no buts. Six months. And then the prisons filled up really fucking quickly and they had to like dial that back i have a question yeah we we were the murder

capital of western europe for when they say no knife does that apply to shorter knives and multi tools and stuff like you you can be arrested for having a multi-tool yeah that's insane that yeah that's really bonkers what if there was a guy there was a guy in Aberdeen that got arrested for having a potato peeler. Google it. Google it. Yeah. See if you're fishing or hunting or camping. It's then down to the police officer's discretion.

Without moving my chair, I can reach five knives and three axes. Well, keep them there and you won't have any problems. You won't have the Scottish authorities breathing in your head. It's weird to me that they have laws against just sharpened edges. We have them here. You can't walk the streets with a blade.

They don't have a constitution. I have a multi-tool in my pocket always. That's a big difference. Don't we have like a three inch limit on the blade that we can even carry something like i have three and a half in my head but i'm low confidence yeah that's interesting though because there's constitutional carry of firearms in so many places where you can just strap that bitch on your hip does it pertain to swords can i throw a katana on my back absolutely you can yeah the one question i

got wrong on my concealed carry was that it enables me to carry knives it doesn't I thought you could just carry knives by default I'm going by that or maybe like special knives like the ones that they do have limits on

like butterfly knives or those ones that shoot out like I know they have laws about those right why are butterfly knives like illegal but you could out. I know they have laws about those, right? Why are butterfly knives illegal, but you could walk down the street with the big fucking crocodile gun? It's got to be something from movies.

It's something that got legislated because somebody saw something scary in a movie. It has nothing to do with the danger. I bet you're 100% right. It totally is. It's the same with switchblades, right? Every bad guy in a movie is like, flick. Oh, that's a bad knife. Bad knife.

See the weird thing about it is, see all these things in Scotland, you can buy them. You can buy them and you can have them in your house. The instant you leave your garden, you're breaking the law. How do you get it home? That's true here of a lot of things.

So there's a lot of things we sell here as paperweights that are just bludgeoning weapons. Amazon's got plenty of them. There's plenty of paperweight brass knuckles or blackjacks or all sorts of little bludgeoning tools and instruments.

They're all illegal here. See even the spring battens like the police use. totally illegal. Not allowed them. You're not allowed pepper spray. You're not allowed tasers. A cricket bat for playing cricket. Yeah. Of course, that's what it's for. Yeah, of course.

What was it they say? Oh, if you keep a baseball bat in your car, also keep a mitt. You're loyal. Well, thank you. Yeah. And if I'm ever showing up to beat somebody up with a baseball bat, I'm wearing my uniform. Thank you. Yeah. And like, if I've ever showed up to beat somebody up with a baseball bat, I'm wearing my uniform. I got cleats on.

Meanwhile, you're like 36 years old. You haven't played baseball in 18 years. I'm wearing that fucking like the whole uniform to court too. It came at me when i was playing ball what did you play sir irrelevant it's my made-up game speaking of weapons because because there's a lot of street violence in scotland that's why it was like all that stuff was like horrendously like illegal you would get immediate time for it but there was one

big fight i was in because like i said you know like youths you know we're from here you're not from here we don't want you here and then the fight would start well there was a fight where there was all of us and there was all of them everyone always goes like oh why are you talking about shit like this on stream this is Scotland this is just what people did

growing up like fucking this is just the way things are here but a guy turned up to a fight with a stepladder, a little stepladder, like a little three step stepladder, and we are all laughing at him and pointing at him, going like that, what the fuck, what are you going to do with that, what are you going

to do with that, and then we all charged into each other, I got knocked out with a stepladder. At least, at least, allegedly, I don't remember a fucking thing. I don't remember shit. I just remember waking up after it and I'm sort of like,

body jerking around and shit like that. And all my friends are going, fucking hell, man. Your head ate that fucking stepladder, man. You got fucked up. What was that, man? Gang in Scotland, just just like rolling in office chairs various things from the supply backwards like like chicken legs like the bones are slightly sharp

like they're the jets. You just snap it at you with staplers around. I bet you guys fuck somebody up with a stapler. It's just the weapon laws here are just fucking so strict. Firearms are just completely gone. None at all. You get people as well that go, no, you can get a shotgun and you can get like you can apply for a license but like to meet the requirements it's just not possible the only

way that you ever meet the requirements for any type of firearms like pistols full ban pistols are completely banned you're not allowed them full stop but like you can get like a deer hunting rifle or a shotgun but the the hoops and requirements you have to meet are so strict that like nobody gets it and in order to get those licenses you would have to have never even breathed near a police officer in your entire life like i got i got my you see even an air rifle like a little two two spring loaded like air rifle you need a license for that as well and my license got rejected not for the nazi pug stuff not for the fucking fighting or anything like that but because when i was 17 i

was caught drinking in the street that's why my license just allows you forever from owning a hunting rifle for something that happened like 15 years prior so not even a hunting rifle a 2-2 air rifle this thing would give a deer a slight bruise right it's just i mean i'm pretty sure those are in the toy section in america yeah if you shot me with that you would hurt my feelings yeah and then woody would respond with a real weapon yeah what do you be like that's neat here, here's my gun. The reason they got banned was this happened in Glasgow. There was firefighters attending a building that was on fire and everyone was crowded around to watch. And some dickhead was firing an air rifle at the firefighters,

but then he hit this two-year-old boy in the head and the two-year-old boy ended up dying and because of that all air rifles absolutely banned so basically there was shit tons of hobbyists like all over scotland and it was like a pretty expensive industry it was pulling in like a few million like every year and everything like that but now it's completely utterly shut down because like i said that the hoops you need to jump through the requirements like nobody could fucking meet them but that was the plan like that was the plan like to take everyone's fucking guns away yeah absolutely that's not a knife thing because they're really useful tools yeah i've got a little one i use for fishing and everything as well but like again even if i'm

fishing and i get caught with that knife it's down to the officer's discretion. I ask about that. Our officer is like, well, this guy's clearly fishing. It's a fillet knife. Some will be complete dicks. A lot of our police officers are like, everyone talks about police officers on power

trips in America. Ours are so much worse, and it's a lot to do with the... It's hard to be a lot worse. What is worse about them? Police officers in Scotland tend to be Protestants. Which is

us going back into that whole thing again. And if you've got an Irish last name, then you might be in a little bit of trouble. Really? So they find somebody with with they find an o'malley you know in the middle of the lake he's more likely to get in trouble than uh you know smith they they deny that shit happens they deny it happens but it fucking it fucking happens it happens huh well that's fucked up yeah like not not being able to have knives is so fucking foreign and bizarre because like when i when you think about a knife like what what list what where in the list when you just think knife 40 do you think stabbing someone it's so low you think like yeah

when i think it's like yeah i keep a knife that would be illegal where dank is right near my front door and its only purpose is boxes yeah yeah oh my god right now i hardly leave bed because my leg's broken but normally i use my knife every day and it's almost all on amazon boxes yeah it's yeah something it's just it's removing such a utility like what yeah sometimes you need a knife the concept of the edge being illegal i know but like the concept of a sharpened edge being illegal is so it's like outlawing subtraction like what no this is cavemen figured this shit out i don't know how you uh i don't know what the laws are there but i'm guessing that it's illegal for him to have a knife that he doesn't need for work outside his home right well you miss what dank said and that like it's up to the

cop's discretion so if you have a multi-tool that you use to pull the hook out of a fish's mouth if that cop doesn't like you you can arrest you while you shouldn't have that that can kill people because then what will happen is they'll be the the fucking all of a sudden there's there'll be a gang called the leather men and all they'll do is fucking look if you want to kill somebody with a leather man man you'll absolutely make it happen leather man is a sturdier knife than that green piece of shit there but well what he was saying was that if you go fishing and you have you know what a fishing knife looks like probably the audience just do it's a special fillet thing and it's clearly a purpose-built fishing knife it's up to the officer's

discretion if this is you're on a you're in a rowboat in this situation the officer might be like no i don't think you should have that knife it's like clearly this knife has utility for what i'm up to yeah well i'm sure there's gonna be repercussion for you in the legal system down the road though right you'll get to the court and the judge will be like ah well was he on a fishing boat yeah did he have fish yeah was he cleaning the fish with the knife yeah I think it's a fishing knife officer yeah but the thing is you still get arrested

and you still get fucking your knife confiscated and you still have to go to court and all that stuff and that shit just shouldn't happen it costs you money it does though I mean I got arrested for like carrying that pistol that time they were like ah your permit doesn't work and it's like you say so i mean you do have handcuffs and you have a gun also and you did you have a concealed carry oh yeah i was a thousand percent legal yeah i didn't know if you were open

carrying or something i was open carrying but it doesn't matter in georgia like i have a permit to carry a handgun yeah in north carolina you don't need a permit to open carry unless it's changed i could be out of date concealed yes but open no yeah there wasn't a distinction here at the time like like i haven't made that point i was like open carrying is the more kind way to carry like like like as far as law is concerned i'm like i got it out here for all to see i'm not hiding the damn thing because i don't think there's anything wrong with what i'm doing that's what i'm implying by my actions here i walked into a walmart wearing a ruger sir if i thought if i was up to no good i wouldn't have been playing fucking spyro yeah in the in

the video game section with my cousin all You wouldn't have picked a Georgia Walmart because you're not the only guy there with a Ruger. You're in Hartwell, Georgia. My odds of getting out of here are slim. If I start shooting, I'm not making it past home. The good old boys in the parking lot are going to slay me. Dude, you go to a southern Walmart parking lot at 11 p.m. at night, there's a crowd of guys out

there who will gun you down it'll be a firing squad they're all they're jacked up trucks with you in their mouth trying to fuck some hillbilly yeah and they all got their culture in it and to be respected that's right yeah um yeah i didn't really think about how everyone else had one but yeah and in north carolina every so often i see someone open carry but somehow they're able to vibe i do this all the time like like especially the old guys yeah even i saw young ones open carrying recently and they had this like if you have a problem this is really a you problem i do this every day vibe about them and they were like 24 and i was like okay i don't know i just it wasn't alarming because they didn't seem to give a fuck no i don't mind it at all um and people try

to make that a racial issue sometimes they're like oh they're all about gun rights until we want one and i'm like i love seeing black people with guns. We want as many as an ex-gun owner. We want as many black gun owners as we can get. We'd love for you to be part of the fun that is gun ownership. They're for defending your rights

and y'all get your rights trampled on more than anybody. You shouldn't be able to vote unless you own guns. You know, you're close. You shouldn't be able to vote unless you own guns. They've got to... You know, you're close. I have something similar where I can't vote or own guns.

You move those pieces around. We could double negative that back into some parlay back into voting. I think I'm going to build a PC soon. I put my parts together and it's like i don't know low three thousand dollars to get the best i9 and the best uh you know cpu and the best uh 3090 ti gpu 3090 ti that's as good as it gets that's as good as it gets or the brand new one

that's now available but it came out like a year ago or whatever. I don't know when the 39Ti came out, but it's the best one I can get right now. So that's what I want to do. And correct me if I'm wrong here, but why waste any money at all on a motherboard? Why not get the most basic bitch motherboard that everything will plug into, which costs like $130?

I don't need Wi-Fi or lights or any of that shit. I need my RAM to stick in there, my CPU to sit in there. It's an outlet. I think you're right. I feel like whenever I once bought the best motherboard you could buy. This is a couple of generations ago. And all the extra features it gave me, stuff like it was designed for competitions where you crank up your cpu and you know of course there's air cooling and there's water cooling this had features for um

co2 cooling i think and okay you know where you pour like liquid liquid nitrogen or something that's what i'm looking for yeah yeah so that you can overclock your cpu into ridiculous speeds while you pour like i don't need any older than i as a consumer i never use this what's the competition it's a thing it's a hobby oh it's okay it's not meant to be practical it's meant to win a competition okay now and uh this was a the kind of motherboard that enabled you to do that and it just wasn't useful to me yeah i'm gonna cheat out on the mobo uh i'm gonna spend my money um obviously on the gpu and the cpu cpu 600 bucks gpus 1400 so you're already two grand right there and you don't even have a case right so uh the only other thing that i think i'm gonna

spend any money on um besides obviously a decent do you need a case wouldn't that be great a case for cooling just letting it all lay on the floor? They say it's not. I'm with you. I've had that same thought. But people are like, no, what you need is a tunnel. You need directed air from here to there. You don't need it open. And I'm like, but I don't know.

Open sounds really good. That makes sense. I understand. You want airflow. You need airflow. You got to get rid of all that heat that CPU is going to be making. The fans are right on the hot stuff. Why not have it open around the fans?

But they say I'm wrong. Yeah. And then DDR5 RAM is out. So I guess I'll grab 32 gigs of that. I don't fuss too much about the speed of the RAM, but I like to have too much. I like everyone to be like, what, he didn't need 64 gigs.

I know. But I got a Photoshoposhop open i'm not even using it yeah and i'll never use it and i'll never close it i think i think it might matter a little bit for some of the games i'll play we'll see um but ddr5 like i said is the new stuff it's a little bit expensive but i think i can get 32 gigs of that for like less than 200 and then um uh i don't do storage at all my current pc has 256 gigs of total storage because what the fuck am i storing over here if when i get tired of a game i uninstall that shit i've got real internet i can download it again in 10 minutes like why would i store

gigs in terabytes and terabytes of games so i'll get like a now one terabyte uh m.2 is like i don't know they're giving them away they're just okay now so like it's a badass pc it seems like the best pc money can buy for like 3300 or something so i think i'm gonna start on that do you ever reuse your old cases and stuff like you must have you must be i bet you've got two or three pcs that are outdated now uh like four pcs that are outdated. That you don't even turn on? No, don't turn them on. Well, my 1080 Ti

system, I just gave that to Kitty so she'd have a gaming PC because her old gaming PC was from the previous generation when we both bought PCs together. We had like these, I don't know, they were like 660 GPUs, SLI'd, some 590s I think. That's what it was.

It's been a long time ago. I usually just give them to a friend or somebody when I've got a system. What am I going to do with a 1080 TI gaming system? It'll run every single game you'd want to play, but I don't have any use for that because I want to run the most extreme games at the highest settings and stuff. I feel like if I haven't

turned the computer on in four years, I could probably throw it away and harvest its case. Yeah. I don't know. There's good stuff in this one. I can't just throw this one away. The one I'm using is a 2080 Ti that runs Tarkov at 95 frames per second. It's a good PC.

I feel like if you disable that PC, the one you're currently using, you're going to be like, oh, fuck. It had a password. It had my tax return on it. It had whatever. It doesn't. It's the one before that that you haven't used. I have one old one that has stuff on it, and I don't know how to get it off.

That's a question I need a computer guy for because there's an old, it's not mechanical hard drive on a three-generational PC. And I'm like, I bet there's some old nonsense videos on there or or who knows what like i'd like to see what's on there because uh survival footage you're gonna finally release it from that weekend yes like literally i don't know where it is like because i went through all my thumb drives and all my um little um um little cards the other day and i got a pile you know because i wouldn't was terrible about organization. And when we go to do a new shoot, it's like, Oh, we're going to film in Tennessee tomorrow. Go buy three 32 gig cards. Then, you know, we got fresh ones. Now we know we're not taping over anything. I don't have to go in and format

here they are. And so I just have a pile of them now, but I went through everything and all I've ever been able to find that was difficult to find was uh our paintball footage from chicago and i know it's the building where you get shot in the face point blank i'm like this is when it happened and i'm scrubbing through it i spent half an hour the other day just watching that footage and couldn't find the moment it happened but i distinctly remember watching you eat that fucking paintball to the forehead and thinking like if woody were a meaner guy he'd scream at that kid i won't say the guy's name but that other fellow we know he'd have screamed at that kid oh i know you're thinking of um yeah that guy was careless with his wasn't his best day no shot me in the face oh man oh i was talking about the

the youtuber who screamed at the kid a decade ago yeah i said it wasn't his oh yeah that was yeah that was uncomfortable i remember going back and being like i'm gonna i'm gonna get more air in my gun didn't like that yeah yeah i don't remember if i said anything nice to that kid, but now I hope I did. Yeah, I talked to him about that. I know we're being so obtuse. I heard his side of the story and how it built. He was having a pretty rough day. It wasn't like he got shot.

I don't know. He just felt like it kept getting worse, kept getting worse, and he blew up. Yeah, well, I mean, i don't give a fuck what he thinks of me so you know he showed up there um to do a job and then he didn't want to do his job and uh he wanted to be talent instead of um a worker and that's what actually happened and if he got upset about that because some kid shot his camera uh that's that's his problem because he wasn't there as talent he was there as a cameraman so hey we're doing a project here with a bunch of famous youtubers you want to come record

it oh yeah that's what i do all right and then he gets there and he's like i'm one of the guys i'll record everything today and then i'll just jump in and play paintball for the rest of the weekend it's like no we flew you here to be a videographer or videographer that's what happened if i'm being honest about what happened and that is what happened it is but it was a great time playing paintball for me i always make sure that like shit will be going to everything will be going to shit behind the scenes and people be like oh you must be so stressed out kind of like why the fuck would i care what any of those people think i'm gonna go play paintball with those kids i'm gonna light their little asses up.

They're going to be like, FPS Russia fucked me up. We had some good times. I remember, so we were maybe four or five people with good guns. I was one of them. And then there were like 80 people with Tippmans. And it was like, all right, let's play 5v80. And really, the teams were pretty lopsided. The 5 had a huge advantage.

Whoop them. Whoop them good. It was like playing Nazi zombies or something. You just wreck everything. It was fun. Yeah, it was fun. I haven't played in a little bit. Last time I played anything, it was Airsoft out in Atlanta.

There's some pretty good Airsoft places indoors. Can you paintball in Scotland? Or you can't Airsoft and paintball too? Oh, no, it's okay. We've got paintball here. There's paintball courses, but there's rules for how you transport your paintball guns. Jesus Christ. Yeah, they're supposed to be in special cases where it's's it's meant to take you like a while to get into them in case in case i don't know in case the police pull you over and you might

want to give them a bruise you might pull it out and give me an owie yeah like yeah i'll pee i'll peeve you off like oh kyle i didn't tell you there's a um i have a contractor at my house right now we're working on the master bathroom and uh you know i pop my head in to see like how it's going it's been multi weeks and he's like you're what he's gamer tag right and i'm like yeah yeah he goes so you you know fps russia and i was like, I'm playing like I'm a big deal. I knew him before he was Russian. And he goes, he's younger than us,

like a bunch younger. And he's like, I met him at Living Legends. Meanwhile, I'm there. There's no recollection of me. He's like, I met FPS Russia at Living Legends and I went on to become

a professional paintball player. He started listing these teams that he played for. They don't mean anything to me, but it sounded like they would mean something to someone else. You just kind of affected the trajectory of his life in a paintball way. Good, good. I hope he does a good job on the room.

Me too. He seems like a nice guy. He's good. That's really cool. I hope that I affected a lot of children's lives and their trajectories just didn't all just go down. I hope they didn't all become like assholes and like blow their legs off shooting lawnmowers or something.

Like that one jabroni who ruined it for us all. I seen that video. That was fun. You can have as much fun as you want until somebody gets hurt. That's kind of the rules in that sort of legal area. Woody does something that's also in that legal gray area with his paramotoring.

If a paramotor, God forbid, ever did a bad thing, and let's just leave it at that, it'd be bad for all paramotors. When paintballers see people shooting those things out of a window at pedestrians, we fucking cringe. We hate it. it's the worst thing that could happen it's it's it must be how like um you know muslims feel when they see terrorists spouting a bunch of stuff they don't believe in and you know on television it's like oh my god this isn't what it's paintballs

about fun yeah people in paramotoring probably are similar in this way you're only allowed to hurt yourself or you know people in the sport like you guys all have an agreement if a paramotor is falls out of the sky and dies which happens way too often then it's fine they don't make any new rules they say that guy made a personal decision that was his risk envelope and it didn't work out for him. Cool. The day he lands on a stroller is the day that we get new laws. Yeah. Yeah. Well, hopefully that doesn't happen. Yeah. That's, I was thinking about, um, motorcycle licenses. So when you get a driver's licenses for car, the permit doesn't get you much. You need to have a 21 year old next to you, at least in the States I know of. And, uh, and then that guy sits there and guides the permitted driver through the process. He doesn't help you with transportation

at all. It's worthless. You know, like you already have a 21 year old who can drive you in that situation. You can already get where you need. He just there to teach motorcycles. On the other hand, you get a permit. It's pretty much as good as a license. I think you can't have passengers and I don't know any other restrictions, good as a license i think you can't have passengers and i don't know any other restrictions like a motorcycle permit you go around the whole country you can go as far as you want i'm pretty sure you can drive at night but i'm not positive you can ride any bike you want big ones little one small one doesn't matter you can do any bike oh yeah over here it's what is it you're only allowed up to a certain cc and no passengers either uh yeah

i could be wrong i thought in europe there was a power there's too many rules in not a cc limit but i'm not positive but um uh here any bike literally anybody ridiculous bikes with six cylinders and shit you can have them with a permit and i kind of like the idea because if a motorcycle gets into an accident typically one person is hurt. I rarely hear about people in cars getting hurt by motorcycles and certainly not seriously. That motorcycle is making a personal decision with his own risk profile. So I kind of like that. It's like a freedom thing to me.

Like, yeah, that permit. Knock yourself out. You're not going to hurt anyone else. You hurt yourself. You're allowed to. What bothers me about motorbikes is because they're a lot cheaper to run than cars. The tax is cheaper.

The petrol is cheaper and everything. But the thing that bothers me is you're not just relying on yourself. You're relying on other people. You could be the most careful motherfucker ever. You do your signals. You do your turns. You go, oh, is it raining today? Maybe not. And everything. You can do all of that. you do your signals you do your turns you go oh is it raining today maybe not and everything like

you can do all of that all it takes is for one dickhead not to check his mirror and that's that's you yeah that's yeah that's what bothers me because i would ride a motorbike but that i'm like i know i'll be careful like when i go through a green light i look both ways i don't depend on the other person stopping at the red light having said that you can't be perfect you know like i stop at red lights who's to say the guy behind me also does yeah you know like you are taking a risk that's just what's up so i don't know it's nothing's gonna, probably not. That's what that other guy thought. That's what the guy who fell out of the sky thought.

That's what the... That guy who got the top of his head chopped off. Now he looks like a real asshole. He was an asshole beforehand. Fuck that guy. What a dumbass. Yeah, hat-wearing motherfucker. what a dumbass dude hat wearing motherfucker i think he might be bipolar i don't know the nastiest grumpiest person on facebook flies a

paramotor talk shit to everyone he pulls my name out of a hat all the time all the fucking time has nothing to do with me and he's like i bet fucking matt woodworth is gonna come here and say something i have a bit of this forum in months i hear that i hear he's like, I bet fucking Matt Woodworth is going to come here and say something. I haven't been in this forum in months. I hear that. I hear he's a real level-headed guy. And then that walking asshole who does nothing but start shit and talk down to people for years.

Yeah, sometimes he loses his head. He's on the ground and he chops fucking part of his head off. Off the top of my head, I can't think of any issues with what he's done. And I tell him, no one likes this guy. He's deformed now.

What did you say, Taylor? He's deformed now. But it's almost like a version of the Glasgow Smile. It's showing, hey, don't trust this guy about aviation tips because he's not reliable. He needs one of those graduation caps.

You know, just flat on top. So what was that? What was it? Do you mean like a paraglider or some shit like that? Zach, can you pull up a picture of a paramotor? A cool one. The coolest one you can find. So it's like a paraglider which I guess you know except that there's a

propeller on your back so you can launch from flat ground and fly up whereas paragliders have this is gonna be bad oh that's a trike anyway I think I know what you mean when it's sort of like strapped on your back like a jetpack kind of yeah it's a

backpack propeller eliminate the wheels that chopped the tippy's head off you mean where it's sort of like strapped on your back like a jetpack kind of yeah it's a backpack eliminate the wheels and that chopped the tippy's head off so when you start it if it goes wrong and it like starts at full speed it jumps at you and it's really hard to hold it back because it comes at you and it twists so like like you're a strong guy If you put your hand on it, you'd think you could hold it. But when it comes at you and twists and tips, even a strong person gets defeated by it. And the amount of thrust they have is something like 130 pounds. So you're like, it's just hard, dude. 130 pounds on your best day.

Maybe if it was a straight force, you could hold, but 130 pounds where it's twisting and pushing and you're getting your head chopped off. Which is what happened. Good! Yeah. I'm glad that he had that axe. Nobody more deserving than this asshole. It just topped him. So he's not dead.

It just took a chunk out of the top. Now he's got a friar tuck thing going on. Remember Kill Bill when she cut off the top of Lucy Liu's head? It's exactly like that. That's what we're talking about. Or in Hannibal.

It wasn't Red Dragon. It was the third one, right? Yeah, it was called Hannibal. No, it was Hannibal where he feeds him his brain. He cuts the top of his head off and removes it and then he cuts a bit of brain out and fries it over there and then gives it to him. Isn't it Ray L it ray leota it's ray leota all right that's why that scene works so well because ray leota was awesome i loved him man that that might be yeah he died uh within the

last year how that might be in his 60s i think by the way there have been a lot of a lot of mobster actors like dying recently by the way there's's been a lot, even in just the last few months. We all criticized Putin. Yeah. Hey, don't. I don't know about this Putin guy. That would be...

Rewatching it, he's such a great character. I love Paul. I love Silvio. Silvio, man. He's the best guy in it. Even the intervention for Moltisanti where he goes, your head was in the toilet and you were being sick.

Disgusting. I said my piece. Your head was in the toilet. It was disgusting. Come on, Paul. You said nothing bad. I've said my piece. My head was in the toilet. It was disgusting. Come on, Paul. You said nothing, nothing bad. I've said my piece. It's supposed to be a constructive dialogue. And it,

it actually ends with them stomping the shit out of his collarbone. And get like, no, they fracture his skull. He has a hairline fracture in his skull. When they get him to the ER, they went too hard. hard she's like he's a very lucky man it's just a fracture and tony's like oh good good good and she's like how did he how did he get hurt again tripped off at something yeah yeah let me go talk to him and immediately starts fucking

straying if you ever do this and that again i'm gonna fucking kill you if you or anybody else fucking dead and he's in that neck brace and everything I'm sorry Tone I love that shit it's so good Ray Liotta has six more movies releasing good gosh oh Jim's every one I'm sure he saved the best for last good fellas no thanks

come on this is gonna be some garbage they call them uh what geezer teasers right when you you get the old guy who used to be famous on your cover he says like 20 words in the movie he gets a 90 of the budget and he doesn't do anything he's not integral to the plot he's like the guy they go see halfway through to get their guns from him or something what was the movie with um i can't there were two great actors in it one was was Irish and one was a mobster. I think it was to Netflix.

One was De Niro. The Irishman. The Irishman. Did you guys like it? No. It was too long. Yeah, it was too long. There was a lot of...

I liked it, but it was too long. I'll say that too. I enjoyed it, but it was too long. It had a lot of that Scorsese shit where it's like okay this is just like for the vision of it like for the art he perceives in this shot like nothing's being advanced and usually like I enjoy

when he throws that in there it helps with world building but there was a shit it could be too much you know he used to do that Breaking Bad like I love Breaking Bad I think it's one of the best TV shows that's ever been aired and it ended well which is rare even on great tv shows but i can recall watching scenes play out in the reflection of a chrome door handle and i'm like oh my god you're jacking yourself off with your cinematography i hate that too like every if it's if it's sprinkled in if if once

throughout breaking bad there was like a scene where it was in a mirror and then you realize it's in a mirror later you're like oh that's neat that's a neat little trick to the camera but every two episodes it's like all right we're gonna do this whole scene of junior talking to his mom in the rearview mirror of their prius or whatever i think they i saw something filmed out the exhaust pipe one time and i was like we're watching this scene through a paper towel roll the whole time what are you doing you're not gonna break the immersion if you show them close i know i'm not in the film like i don't need to sneak up on the protagonists i'm aware of what i know what the score is here like there's too much sometimes it's it's like it's to the

point like i totally agree with you on this that it is that their artsiness sometimes takes you out of the moment where if it was just you watching you know walt and jesse talk or whatever you're in you're paying attention to what the characters are doing. If it's from an exhaust pipe or a reflection in a Chrome door handle, you're not really paying attention to what's being said. You're looking at the weird warped, like, like a fun house mirror effect. So yeah, it less is more sometimes. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

I hear better call Saul is tremendous. I think me too. I need to try more of it. The finale's happening right now, I think, or it may have already happened. Wrapping that one up, I should probably get on that thing. I still haven't watched the end of The Boys for some reason. I've just been putting it off. Oh, that's interesting.

Yeah, I haven't seen the last episode yet. I need to get on that. I got on For All Mankind. I got really absorbed into that. I'm also absorbed in for all mankind i i watched the boys on like on time i liked it it ended well but it i was calling the boys the best show on television for a while but i feel like it's a little formulaic and i had a prop look you don't know anyone who likes sex scenes more than me in regular tv shows true nobody but i'm watching like some gratuitous shit sometimes and i'm like are you trying to shock me is this like when rap music discovered cursing in the 80s like it's not even good right now you're just doing this to do it

like you're overdoing it i yeah i'll take it out. It's too much. I hate to say it, but there is a fourth season of For All Mankind coming, but the third season is the worst season so far, for sure. The first season is the... I think the second season might...

First two are very good. The first two are very, very good. I think that the first season's the best i i think i would go with that um but the third kind of kind of the characters do a few things and you're like come on i'm enjoying a little bit of the advanced game in for all mankind so in the first season just getting to space is kind of hard just getting to the moon is kind of hard having enough fuel to land on the moon is a tricky, can we pull this off sort of thing.

In the second season, they're established. There's a base. It looks comfortable there. It looks like regular people who aren't astronauts could live in the space station. It's the end game. It's the part in Tarkov where you're rich. And I kind of like that it's not all about

like, is this rocket even going to leave the ground? I think you lose a little bit of the adventure of the whole thing, but what you gain is all the politics between Russia and the United States because, spoiler alert, the Russians want a base on the moon too. So now you've got an American base and a Russian

base on the same crater even, on the moon. And they're in the same place because that's where the water's been discovered. The Americans discovered the water for people who don't watch the show. And at least in the parts I watched, feel entitled to it. Like, we found this

water. It's ours. The Russians don't agree to that set of rules. They're like, this is the moon. No one owns it. Season 3 is interesting because just when you're starting to feel comfortable with the time that set of rules they're like this is the moon no one owns it yeah and uh season three is interesting because just when you're starting to feel comfortable with the time period that they're in it's like ah swinging 60s all right we hate women and yeah we'll allow the black to fly i suppose and then all of a sudden it's the fucking 80s bro the gays are the ones not getting treated right now we got to get them in here and then like now I'm in the nineties or I have been,

cause I finished season three and it's like, it's a whole different group of group of people. There's a part where the old white guys are like, it's just about what's in your pants nowadays. Sad face. Like they don't get to fly their planes anymore. And it's like, yeah,

it actually is, but that's okay. Cause they're good at flying them too. Like, I don't even mind that they've got the lady astronauts. It's like, look, that's what we're doing here. It's not just about who can build the best rockets. It's about whose way of living is superior, the communist Soviets or the Americans.

And it's like if you're a woman in the United States and you're like, I don't know. In the Soviet Union, they send women to the motherfucking moon. That's where they are on the playing field over there. Yeah, we don't do that here. I see your point, but I hate it. I like it merit. What if you're German, though? What if you're in West Germany and you're like,

Soviets have shit together. They're sending women to the moon. Mama, I want to be an astronaut. I think if I go over there, I've got a shot. So they're playing that game they're in real life i've criticized the biden administration for this like like when he picked his vice president um i think he picked her because she's a he definitely said he was picking a woman he ended up picking the black woman of color i believe he it was his credentials oh did he say he was going to pick a woman of color a woman of color i think was what

he said i could be wrong i thought he said just a woman, and he ended up picking both. I want to say the Supreme Court justice was going to be a woman of color, and he limited himself to just women of color for the Supreme Court justice. So there's like four applicants. There's four. She turns out she's immensely qualified, but I still feel like in terms of right and wrong, best available. That's the most fair, best system.

To say best available amongst women of color, it's like, well, you've cut off a lot of good people. That's not this name. See, the reason that I don't like it is it's like, ah, we have appointed the first black, et cetera, et cetera. Everyone's looking at that person going that's the only reason why you're there you know it wasn't your hard work your hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt going to university for like six fucking years but in the show that it was you just you were black congratulations as a real world thing as a real world thing obviously not in favor for it but in the show, it's brilliant.

It's what they need to do to win this space race they're in. And if you look at the black lady astronaut, might be the most honorable, selfless, hardworking, credentialed. Well, they're not going to make her a dummy. I'm coming to show. In pause right there, there's actually another astronaut. She gets last place in almost every category while she's training, but her husband's an astronaut

and she's pretty, and that's why she sort of makes it to the end and gets to space. They pick four women. If you're last place in any of those, they just gotta cut the chaff. You shouldn't make it. They're gonna pick four women, and they pick the three best and the one prettiest.

Because it's about, like you said, the point they wanted to make. Because Nixon wants a girl astronaut to take her fucking visor off on the moon and to be pretty. Because we're going to be... Is this somebody on the... We're making TV here.

We're making propaganda. We're making TV here and he wants a look how our geniuses are even sexy not like these ugly russian women are pretty oh wait was she you think she was i thought i i didn't when she lifted her visor i still sent a dog into i didn't know it was a woman i didn't know it was a woman they were like it's a woman and i'm like that's the most unreasonable thing i've seen so far that guy i mean it's a woman it doesn't look like a woman she looks so plain faced and like prairie driven like like like that pale would like chapped part sarah plain and tall sarah plain and tall up on the moon but

she's like she's clearly like a i don't know she's got a full face a wide full crop picking in the middle of nebraska-picking, in the middle of Nebraska face. Or I guess in the middle of Siberia. A Ukrainian wheat farmer face. Yeah, absolutely. There's tons of Ukrainian wheat farmers. I'm looking for a picture of her.

Yeah, if you search Russian female astronaut on the moon, I'm afraid I'll get a real one. I don't think they sent anybody to the moon. Yeah, well, there's never been a lady on the moon like i'm afraid i'll get a real one i don't think they sent anybody to the moon yeah yeah well there's never been a lady on the moon so you won't find any oh wait what am i thinking or russian all right yeah i guess they didn't they kind of we kind of backed off after after you know the first four or five guys remember what um oh that's the late that's an american lady look at her yeah i know our

oh yeah exactly case on this one i made that same mistake on further review monocle adjustment for that one did i pick the right person i can't tell i think that might be a real life woman. You know how we as humans started out? This is a real cosmonaut, Woody! I'm in Google Limit Search. I don't have a lot of details. Well, that's a real...

The article talks about how she was a cosmonaut. Well, if you read the words, that's cheating. Valentina Tereshkova. In any case, very good show. I highly recommend it to any of you who like sci-fi anything like that it reminds me I could see that maybe this is the

Expanse universe how it got it's shit kicked off the Expanse is another fun little space show but no I dig this a lot I found it for real I can see why Kyle and I didn't line up because you don't see her very well you don't zach's about to show it to everyone i'm like squinting at that like

that's a woman i think that's meant to be the real one she looks so similar to me perhaps oh they may have honored the real cosmonaut by making her the one who would have gone up there because they did that with um one of the characters, the Cobb character, Sally Cobb, you know, the real, the best of the ladies. Okay.

Yeah. Yeah. That's a real, she really was, I believe part of that Mercury program that they described early on with women. And like, and so what they've done by rewriting history is like taking the person

who was actually in that position to get that job and giving it to them and i want to say john glenn is not in there but they talk about him all the time and his personality and neil armstrong and buzz aldrin yeah yeah so and that guy who runs the space center with that flat top haircut i either that was a real popular haircut or they've not deep the the one before him um but he looks just like uh it's that haircut you always see when a guy's running NASA. Even Apollo 13. I can't think of the actor's name, but same fucking awful flat top.

I'm glad that's not a thing anymore. Well, your friend's got a flat top, but that's not a choice he made. No, no. And it's not his friend. As a foe, he's like... Aw, come on. They're pals. The guarantee is ash. That guy, he talks shit about me. as a foe he's oh come on they're they're pals the gear into his ash that guy he's talk shit about me i accuse him of having uh like cte and ask him how he got it

he's gonna need hair plugs soon is it just smooth up there or what definitely not smooth he doesn't want to show i just know that it's not round like show it you coward yeah take your pull up the picture from um search the great outdoors bald bear i mean this is what this is what he looks like this is what he looks like picture in my head uh it's so funny oh i'm it's real good when people who are kind of dicks or whatever get their comeuppance a little bit especially like like this way because this is i mean this is the guy who's like, ah, you're flying your armchair wrong. Your lawn chair's going up too fast. And then like he cuts

the top of his skull off with his armchair. He has nothing positive to say ever. And he's constantly ripping and he rips on me in particular when I'm not even in the conversation. He just pulls me in for no reason. Look at this bear. Real life. This guy flew a paramotor.

Poor bear. John Candy shot that bear with a shotgun. That's a good movie. I saw it. I've seen it more than once. Me too. That was a family flick that we'd watch a lot. I think it was a John Williams movie.

John Candy, when I was a kid, was impossibly fat. Can you pull up a full body picture of John Candy when I was a kid was impossibly fat. Can you pull up a full body picture of John Candy? It was like you didn't know he was going to survive. He's a big boy. I need to see him because in my recollection he's like... That's okay. You can laugh at me.

Do you remember the Goonies? There was a guy named... I'm an easy joke. Shubby or something like that? What was his name? Fuck! Do the truffle shuffle. The Goonies. Oh, fuck. Do the truffle shuffle. The truffle shuffle. Yeah, that guy.

If you see that kid now, he's hardly fat by today's standards. And I feel like John Candy would be the same thing. Let's see. Okay, he's a big guy. He was always a real fat man. But he's like Chris Farley fat. Also an obese man. But look, if I go to...

There are super obese who can barely make it out of their homes. Look, we know one. He's standing. The man's upright. I actually called Wings today. I know you're thinking of him. I owed him a call. He texted me and he texted me again yesterday.

And I was like, I am not being who I aspire to be. And we talked about it. He told me some privilege stuff and I don't recall like what was on and off the record, but my goodness, the trolls are after him right now in a way that doesn't seem fair. Like the punishment doesn't fit the crime, man. They're going

so hard. What now? I don't know what's new. There isn't really anything new. They take some things out of context. Wings of Redemption is not a pedophile. We've said that on the show all the time.

If you want to say Wings of Redemption got irrationally mad at a teammate for not being good enough at rainbow six okay okay i believe you i believe it like all right true but like there was one time and he he like looks back on it and he's like it wasn't a good look i get it there was these two girls in a lobby and they were being all flirty and that was the vibe of the room and they said something about going over to his place and he said you better drive real slow so you're 18 when you get here that's not pedophile look it's not a good look we all agree it's not a good look but to like go bonkers and alert authorities or stream elements.

That was more cringe to me than anything because he wasn't like, I'll say this, I've heard that whole conversation and that's not just some girl in a lobby. That's their Discord friend who they've been hanging out with every night. And it's like, I jump in Discord and I hang out with a whole group of guys. There ain't no children in there. And if there are,'t know it and if there are they're not girls and if they are i'm not hitting on them all right like i'm not saying shit if a fucking 16 year old girl pops into my discord chat over here while we're playing tarkov i'm gonna i'm gonna be like we need to

talk to you about about being in here i'm not sure if it's such a good idea miss little miss like i want to talk to your mom like we gotta talk about this we need to make sure you should do you should do what we did we we had we had a clear out by the way we we had a fucking excellent clear out you trick them you say my discord server's strictly over 18 and we one day went okay we're all on the rails like if you're if you're over 15 then you can be in here and we were like so go on what one of yous were lying and everyone's like i'm really 16 i'm really 17 and they all fucking fell for it

exactly so we were like because the problem is the mods were getting sick of doing that scene for fucking life of brian like are there any women here today like that type of thing right because you're going the way some of these people are acting i can't tell if it's standard internet autism or if these are some people that should not fucking be in here so we did that shit tons of them fucking fell for it and we just banned every single one of them yeah i remember there was a guy in the 50 hangout we do this hangout that the um with the show i'm just looking at my calendar it's not i'm okay but we have a we have a hangout and somebody

looked under 18 and we were all like yo yo they provided id like we had they had to prove they were because this is not a place for kids bro how old are you fucking 19 fucking prove it let's go run them papers let's see you look 15 bro i can't be having a conversation with you in here yeah and look like he didn't mean anything by it but damn it was creepy watching him mac on a child like like and that's what's happening like i watched him mac on a child and i'm that's what's happening like i watched him mack on a child and i'm like he's almost exactly my age and and look i don't think there's anything right wrong with dating if everybody's an 18 year old adult or whatever like i got no problem with any

of that i don't date any 18 year olds just so we're clear but goddamn i'm not macking on no 17 year olds on discord or whatever while we're playing a video game together. I thought the line, drive real slow so you're A-team when you get here. The crime doesn't fit this pun. He's like, Tom has dicks anyway. Maybe there's more to it. I don't know. He's not a pedophile is what it comes down to.

What it comes down to is he's a buffoon. Treat him like a buffoon, not like a pedophile, alright? Make fun of his intelligence. Do right? Make fun of his intelligence. Do that. Make fun of his weight. But don't make up evil shit. He doesn't.

What other ideas do you have, Connor? I thought this was going to be beneficial. Make fun of the way he waddles when he walks. You know? The way his thighs rub against each other. Ask him if he has to lubricate them. And if so, what kind? Chafing is no joke. Chafing is no joke. That's why

we recommend only silicone wet platinum lubricant for your giant fat thighs that rub together. We know they're bald, by the way, boy. Look, he's not a pedophile. He's a fucking buffoon. Treat him like one, but don't frame him as a pedophile. Goddamn. Because here's and here's the worst part. I know nobody gives a shit,

but there's some actual pedophiles, and we should focus on getting them out of like i don't i don't want to say our community but just the fucking internet because it seems like there's a lot of them internet i always make we always talk about it it's like why are there so many pedophiles it's like i don't know but they're really fucking are because they're just they're like 80 more pedophiles taken out in charlotte north carolina sting and it's like, wait, there were 80 in Charlotte that all knew this, all the same circle, like all hanging out together, like knowing the same people. Oh, you know, Joe? Yeah, I know Joe.

Yeah. Mike. Yeah, I know Mike. Ah, you ever go by the basement of the laundromat on third street on Saturday nights? You're goddamn right. And they do that pedophile fist bump or whatever they do. He's my son's godfather. And we go to

the same rape circle. Jesus Christ. But, you know, save that evil shit for them. There's plenty of actual pedophiles like EDP or whatever that you could be focusing your evil on. Do you know that not knowing pedophiles like pedophiles knowing each other? Do you know that no not knowing pedophile like pedophiles known

each other do you know that's the only reason that jared fogel fucking subway jared got caught yeah he was in a big network of like child porn sharing and this is the weird shit like see we see when it first came out you know sub subway jared is a fucking non-synop man and everyone's like i like my children like i like my sub six and 12 and all this type of shit. The thing that was doing the rounds was that fucking phone call with that fucking journalist. Did you hear that phone call? No, I never listened to it.

Basically, Jared used to do trips to schools. Because at first, I just decided to read up on this shit one night because I thought this recorded phone call is why he got fucking caught. But he was doing trips to schools to teach kids to eat fresh and eat healthy and he did the thing with the pants and all that shit, man, right? But he was standing next to a journalist

and apparently he started making really inappropriate comments about the schoolgirls, right? And then it was this whole sort of, ha ha ha, I haven't decided if I'm joking or not. I'm trying to gauge how you feel about this. Like, weird shit, right? The journalist kind of thought, right, something's here, so I'm going to, like, pretend to be into this shit.

And then she ended up having, like, a bit of a relationship with Jared. There was text. There was emails. And there was a phone call. And I'll say to anyone watching, don't listen to the phone call. Do not listen to the phone call. It's fucked up, right? Oh, I've heard that.

Is that when she's picking it out of him, what he's into and stuff? Yeah, and she's getting him to say, he's trying to get her to say sexy stuff about that type of thing, and he says some horrible shit. And by the way, the journalist deserves an award for being able to stay in character throughout the whole thing,

because there's even some times that she almost breaks. He says something horrible and you hear her going like, that's hard. She's trying her fucking hardest right now. See that phone call? That happened

four years before Jared actually got caught. Wow. Didared actually have interactions with real life children or was it all about pictures and stuff there uh there was allegedly he he liked to go on holiday to thailand a lot so yeah yes so he was he was molesting children serious question is it legal there? No, it's not legal. But apparently it's one of those things where if you pay the police enough, apparently

they look away. Yeah, it's fucked up. How much? Shoot. Are we talking about like $125,000 made up currency? $10. That's a lot of money to that.

This is so hilariously on the nose. I'm looking at his transcripts and it's like he went into this with the goal of like, I want to make sure the prosecutors are home by dinner. It says like there's a prostitute or prostitute pretend one. And he said to them, I'm horny again. Is your Asian friend available? Then he followed up with, I can pay you a little finder's fee. I'll pay you big for a 14 or 15 year old. Then they said, maybe.

And he said, depends on if they if they can prove their age, if they can and you can get me 16 or below i'll give you 400 at least he asked again do you have access to any young girls like 15 or 16 because that's what i crave i would hook you up nicely if you did like that he just out out and out saying like looking for for wow right away see those messages sorry what right away when i took from that jared is not a baller at all he was like i'll pay you big and mentioned 400 fucking dollars when i when i heard that i was like what like seven to fifteen thousand dollars is what i was picturing in my head that you'd like slip somebody for like finding you a 16 year old asian girl he's talking about 400 fucking dollars cheapskate this this was the

weird shit like see that phone call you would imagine like once that phone call comes out get like that set is done it's fucking over right he's he's fucked but he lost all that wait for nothing she she gave it to fucking subway she fucking and then basically because she she also gave it to the feds and the feds, that's not enough for us to go on. He's just talking about shit. He's not actually doing it. Right. But that should have been it over.

But then Subway apparently were getting like complaints. Apparently he was making really inappropriate comments about staff and their children and blah, blah, blah and all that. And these date back to like 2004. Right. And then Subway apparently said something like, well, technically he's not an employee. blah blah blah and all that and that these date back to like 2004 right and then somebody apparently said something like well technically he's not an employee so like we can't fire him and all this shit right and weird shit like that now the only reason he actually got caught years later is i

think it's those messages you just read out another guy got caught and this guy was like a manufacturer. He made the stuff, right? So I don't want to talk about it. But basically, he had a computer with all of his customers that he was dealing with it in. It was selling it all to and all that stuff. But he was also the co-owner of a charity with Jared. And when they caught that guy, they went onto his computer and found the messages to Jared of him trying to actually select

and then solicit and then send the pictures, blah, blah, blah. And that's the thing is seeing those four years, those four years after that phone call, who fucking knows what Jared got up to. Oh,

a lot. Jimmy John's. God damn it. Yeah. Quiznos doesn't employ rapists. No, they don't. Dude,

can I just say Quiznos is so delicious. That number one sandwich, they put that olive paste on there. No, they don't. Dude, can I just say, Quiznos is so delicious. That number one sandwich, they put that olive paste on there. That's some good shit. They should change their tagline to like, Zero Children Raped Since 1962. I would love that. Like whatever their founding date was. No, no, no.

It would be like 27,000 days without a child rape. I was just going to say, everyone should probably focus on going to a sandwich shop that doesn't promote a pedophile and everyone's like oh but their sandwiches are really good yeah it was that time where like subway convinced everyone that's like i'm trying to lose weight i need a loaf of bread i need a whole loaf of bread and turkey with an impossibly low amount of protein in it. That's what I need. Their meat is so depressing. I think we're going to call it a show.

Dank, where can everybody find you? All your stuff. In my fucking bed. I'm so fucking tired, man. Four in the morning. This is way past my bedtime. Thank you for sticking in, man. We really appreciate it. We really enjoyed you. Thanks very much.

You can find me, Count Dankle, on YouTube. Don't follow me on Twitter. My behavior on Twitter is atrocious. That's good. PKA 609.