Painkiller Already - PKA 614 W/ Tucker: Brett Farve Welfare Fraud, GOT Talk Returns, Woody Cancer Warrior

Episode Date: September 24, 2022

P.K.A. 614 guest Tucker Taylor. This episode of P.K.A. brought to you by BetterHelp, Wonky Weeds, Death by Gummy Bears, and of course, Lock and Load, the premium cum pill that everyone should be taking if you're not a bitch. Thanks for coming, Tucker. Yeah. Oh, good to be back. I am in a Woody tier hotel and it is, you know, it really,

it makes me respect Woody's toughness, his mental toughness more because here I'm, I'm out of town as you can probably surmise Tucker. And I was like a David Goggins type character. Yes. Yes. I was, I'm on a trip with my wife's family and all they have a lot of,

a lot of, she has a lot of siblings, all their significant others, like 14 people. We're in this big mountain place up in Gatlinburg, hiking Whitewater Raft and a bunch of outdoorsy stuff. And the whole week I'm like planning around doing the show. And I'm like trying to influence people to be like and I had that I had the plan set where it was supposed to be. Everyone was going to fucking leave tonight for almost all of it. And I'd been encouraging like this could be everybody's like leave night.

Yeah, get the fuck out of here so I can like stay and do the show. And then it was like this morning, like late morning, early afternoon. My wife's like, yeah, no one is doing that anymore. But I'm sure no one would mind you just like doing the show there. And I'm like, so not only do I have 13 have 13 people like on how many times you hit her potentially but i'm also gonna be that dickhead like loudly announcing one portion of an inappropriate conversation to people like it's not just my vacation that's mind-numbing that would be so rude of me and so my wife's like we'll find you a place we'll find you a place so we're like all right there's a hotel real close there wasn't and so we find a

hotel the closest one i drive 45 minutes into into gatlinburg i get here it's a 55 a night hotel and i i get in you gotta give me the name of that place because it looks nice to me yeah i was telling i was telling 57 i think it was i was telling kyle that i'm pretty sure all of the labels and placards here were surplus from the uh pittsburgh steelers because all the room cards all the room numbers they've all got a pittsburgh steelers logo on it i don't there's we're in tennessee so i don't know why that would be but the first thing i noticed when i got here oh my god not that bad not that bad but the first thing i noticed when i got here is i'm like all right desk it's really janky it's really happy and there's no outlets near it and so i have to unplug the refrigerator to find a working outlet to plug my laptop in. This is typical in a hotel.

There are no working outlets. To have my phone charging, I have to have it in the bathroom. I had to lean the Bible up underneath where my plug is in the outlet so that it wouldn't fall out like that. This is a shithole. There's red stains on the floorboards. It's gross. There's so much shit.

I guarantee there's bed bugs. It's a hook there's bad bugs it's a hooker motel it's a hooker motel it has to be i haven't told you guys this i ever relate a story and maybe 10 days ago something like that i wanted a new motorcycle i told you guys i was i put a down payment on a new bike but you buy so many motorcycles that i've kind of lost track it's like that's fair that's fair i don't expect you to keep up but i was in a bad mood so i figured i'll just buy a new bike and um they got a call a little while later and they're like woody that bike we said was coming in mid-september it's not we're looking at a ship date of end of november from japan and i'm like well it gets cold here so you're kind of telling me i'm going to get

this bike next spring not cool well this bike is hard to find. There's a reason it wasn't in stock here. It's not in stock anywhere. So I just hit the internet and I start looking everywhere. I find one in the glorious town of Ames, Iowa. So I'm like, Iowa, fuck it. Count me in. So I buy a plane ticket.

I grab my helmet and I fly out to Iowa. And now I'm on a two or three day ride back. This is how the adventure begins. We go there, we buy a motorcycle and we bring it home. In Cincinnati, I had, or in Iowa city, I had a, I didn't have like my first hotel figured out and I'm tired. It's been a long day between the flight and the buying of the motorcycle. You know what it's like to buy a vehicle with all the freaking paperwork and everything i eventually arrive at this hotel and it seems nice but not outlandishly nice and they say 699 and i'm like that's a lot to me i was like and i just said can you do better like that just seems expensive like can you do better? That just seems expensive.

Can you do better than that? And she's like, yeah, yeah. I can do $399. And I'm like, holy shit. So I said, look, I acknowledge that that's better, but that's still a lot for a room. $399. And I just spent like $12,000. It was like $30,000. It was like 30.

What did you buy? Woody's haggling over there. $699. I don't have $500. Yeah. $350. What are you talking $299? So, and I just complimented the woman's tattoo.

She had this like saying like, you know, something about being beautiful on her collarbone that her grandmother had told her when she was a kid. And it was in her grandmother's handwriting. And I just genuinely like the tattoo. I'm like, that is beautiful. I like that. So anyway, now after this, after I've established my connection, I'm like, what can we do on the price? So she calls up her manager and she's like, I got this guy here and he seems like he'll be no trouble. What's the best price we could do? $199 down from $699.

Art of the deal, baby. Art of the deal. Woody, where were you staying that had that flexible pricing and also like $800 is is like prime like the nicest hotel that you should probably ever be like like i've been to cincinnati okay yeah there ain't shit in there this was iowa city i know i said cincinnati but i got the the place iowa city hotel i could say that look it up but we'd ruin the flow of the uh of the show but yeah all these

prices, this is all true. Yeah. And the hotel was nice and had a restaurant on the, on the roof. If you guys want to like, if that helps you find which one it was in Iowa city, but, uh, yeah, it was cool. And I was proud of myself for, for knocking down the, um, yeah, yeah. Like, like good for you. I think now let me ask you this.

Cause, cause in my, I don't know what the place looks like. So like I was expecting a hundred dollar a night hotel like you're yeah a step above the holiday inn maybe um but but but like were you shocked to hear 600 or were you like i knew it was gonna be 699 no i was i thought it was gonna come in at like 380 or something and it's one room or two now what do you i can't even find one that has room i can't even find one that is more than $180 in Iowa city. Yeah. Like I, like the,

the casino. And I scan with you. I'll recognize the name all the way down to. Yeah. Cause like, I like, I mean, I was just curious.

I was like, that's so crazy. Yeah. That's an expensive hotel room. That's, that's crazy. Um, I know,

I think the most expensive one I ever bought... We got that suite one time in Austin. They did come down crazy on the price of that, come to think of it, from like $5,000 to like, I don't know, $2,500 or something. Still exorbitant and absurd, but we wanted to stay in this crazy suite, and it's fucking cool. But anyway, there was another time when... How much did they come down on?

Oh, it was during one of those la trips it was like probably e3 and there were no hotel rooms because it's like during e3 yeah and i want to have sex with a girl but i'm sharing a hotel room with friends and so i'm like with this girl in her car in LA looking for a room to fucking driving around. And we ended up at like, I was like, we'll find a holiday. And of course we will. Let's drive 20 minutes. And we ended up seeing like an LAPD, like scary crime scene type situation.

And I was like, take us back to the fancy part of town. I'll get the expensive one. I think I spent maybe $700 or something. Must have been good pussy it was like a yeah sure but i mean you know it's about the experience too you're having a good time it was about the experience yeah but at that late in that case i want to say it was like a corner suite like we had like a corner of the building like it wasn't that that's crazy i don't know dude in this room someone stole the things that you use to screw on the

top of lampshades why what do they do with the point they're gone i had to put all the lampshade tops back on i the first thing i did when i got here i'm like i need to take a pre-show shit yeah i go to sit on the toilet and i get a rock back an act the toilet is barely moored to the ground and then and then i go to the phone here because i'm like you know they took my card for incidentals i don't want them thinking like i destroyed the toilet like and because it was already rocking they know on it and then i go to call the phone is disconnected no you're there's not a connected all right that's a new one i've never seen the phone disconnected. It's plugged in but you've lifted up. There's no dial tone.

There's no buttons. It's not on. That's even worse. Does it not plug into the wall outlet? I barely had enough toilet paper here to wipe. I didn't look before I started. Thank God. Thank God. I didn't have to duck walk back. Oh, I couldn't go to the actual check-in place. I go to

the actual check-in place here and it says go to a different hotel so i had to drive to a different hotel nearby to check in and i'm like i'm trying to check in for the fucking pittsburgh steelers in whatever the fuck and they're like yeah you're in the right place and i'm like don't be pissed about it like yeah i hate that i stay in some places, but I do expect someone to be working in the office. That's kind of a hotel thing. When I get there, there should be someone nearby. When they're like, call my cell and I'll get up and come in. It's no problem.

It's like, you make me feel bad. I thought you'd be working. I've never gotten that before. Neither have I. Where are you staying? Oh, yeah. The shittiest motels where the door leads directly to your room. Oftentimes, if you get there at night,

there's no one working there. But there is someone on call. I've gone to hotels plenty of times. It's an interesting job. Because I've often had this problem, not to sound like too much of a sleaze, but where I want to go have sex with someone, but I've got people at my house

that I don't want to wake up and weird out. like it happened for when we lived in that lake house i there was like not enough privacy so like kitty's in the basement and i'm up in a loft but like there's nothing but air if you like drew a line between us there's no doors because she's got a fucking spiral staircase so i'm fucking chicks in hotels all the time for years and uh so like sometimes you you roll up there at midnight 1 a.m and you have to like bang on the the like slidey door and then some some guy comes out like sleepy eyed out of the back and i'm like dude you sleep back there it's like yeah man catching some z's i can smell the weed so i know what kind of job this is i i usually have a little chat with those people when i roll in there late at night for whatever reason. I was asking just for like basic tips, like when I was like checking in, I'm like, so I may not be staying here tonight.

What do I is there a drop box for the keys? Is there something like I should do? And one guy said yes. And the other guy said, yeah, but you don't have to worry about it. And I was like, all right, well, is it don't have to worry about it. And I was like, alright, well... Is it a key card? Yeah, it's a key card. I would never do anything.

Why would there be a sign that says you have to return your keys or you get charged $10 if it's a key card? If I'm in a good mood, I leave the key card in the room when I walk out. I make them with me because if you're ever locked out of your house and it's not a deadbolt they work great you don't you don't fuck up a credit card for like breaking into your own house so i keep one of those in my in my in my wallet yeah they're cheap

i keep i have other ways i want to use that card one time i was locked out i was locked out of my house one time and i i think i had to shit too and i wasn't alone like there's people behind me like can we go inside now it's like i'm just like ruining my debit card breaking into the house house one time and i i think i had a shit too and i wasn't alone like there's people behind me like can we go inside now it's like i'm just like ruining my debit card breaking into the house have you ever seen the pool in uh leaving las vegas yeah yeah it's like a dirtier shittier version of that okay with no water in it that happens a lot yeah they don't i stated up like remember a while back i sent you that picture of the microwave in my motel and it had like a turn knob to set the timer and it was that old plastic that yellows yeah speaking of old plastic yellows putin had this big speech where

he's trying to like he's mobilizing the fucking troops right he's calling up all the active and retired personnel he wants like a quarter million men to take over the ukrainians meanwhile i've heard there's people i saw an accountant get drafted he's like this is my paperwork my name is alexei kumanoff and i'm a fucking accountant i've never seen a guy before and they're sending me to the dunbas kyle i don't think you understand you're thinking attorney these are badasses these certified public accountants i I'm a little offended you just said that. He has no military experience is what

I mean. Anybody who has Counter-Strike is sold. This guy can work an adding machine. Aren't like they're intentionally trying to draft anti-war people, like people who speak out against the war they're trying to draft up?

I think they really locked those people up, but they are recruiting for prison. No, Putin said that. Putin said that anyone who's protesting the war will get conscripted to serve in the war. In the war. I thought I heard something like that. They're also recruiting for prisons. Fucked up.

I'm on both sides on that. On one hand, it's my... Look, I'm not a subject matter expert, but if you recruit from prisons, you probably get tough guys. I'm guessing both sides on that. On one hand, it's my... Look, I'm not a subject matter expert, but if you recruit from prisons, you probably get tough guys. I'm guessing. Right? Just a tougher than the general population. Most general people think if they go into prison, they won't

be the toughest guy there. We don't want the toughest military, though. We want the best organized, right? That's the other thing. I've heard they're more likely to desert and they're more likely to steal. You mean to tell me that if you're gonna get somebody using get let me tell you about let me tell you about one of the guys that they that's confirmed been like released from prison they put his mugshot up in his mugshot he's given like a double thumbs up and they're

like this is kukulov mumalov and he's the cannibal of saint petersburg He ate four people and he was caught eating the victims of a car accident he happened upon with a companion. Like him and a buddy came upon a car accident and started consuming people. That's how they finally caught the cannibal of St. Petersburg and they're sending him to Ukraine with a rifle.

I don't think that guy's going to be a net positive to the people around him. I think he's going to cause problems. If I am that accountant and I get conscripted into war, I'm going to hope that it's a bunch of other accountants over that guy. Oh, yeah. You don't want the butcher of Kiloviev watching your back. No, but in Putin's speech, if you look behind him,

he's got those old phones that have turned yellow, that old plastic. And I was like, I got to read Reddit comments. I bet they know. And a lot of people were under the impression that because those were older school phones that they couldn't be hacked from afar the way that digital devices could. But then somebody was like, nope, that's a VOIP. Oh, thank you. Oh, I thought you were going to show the phones. He's like, nope, that's a VOIP.

Oh, thank you. Oh, I thought you were going to show the phones. But he's got three phones behind him, and they all look like the phones from early 2000s that businesses would have. They've got the one with the little digital screen that flips up and all the multi-lines. But then he's got two of those plastic, ugly, yellow phones. It's like, come on.

We posed this scene we're in, right? We picked that wallpaper out and this desk. We fucking got his makeup looking just right. And we left those phones in the shot? Those are ugly phones. That's your grandma's phone. That's grandpa's phone who used to run a hardware store. Yeah.

I'm not inspired by Putin. Every time Putin speaks, I feel like he's annoyed. It looks like he's about to fart. I get the vibe that he's annoyed that he has to be doing this. Like when Zelensky speaks, it's inspiring and he talks not about himself, but about his country and the heroism

and the bravery and all this inspiring shit that he's trying to rally around. Putin is like, we're doing this. Fuck you. Enough of this. I'm tired. Always. Looks like he's gained some weight. If that's a very recent picture. He's looking a little puffy.

He's getting a little puffy in the face. He's getting a little steroid puff. Yeah. You can always see world leaders gain weight when it gets bad for them. Jericho thinks he's on like quarter steroids. Taylor thinks he's on – Stress. Stress.

I bet he's stressing. It's both of our personal biases. I'm like definitely stressing. I'm like, someone's projecting. No, that's a telltale sign. You know, I bet Luke can't put the cheese nips down. That's his real problem, not the Dunbass. Just throwing darts at the board here, but maybe Big ZD. telltale sign you know i bet you can't put the cheese nips down that's not the dunbass just

throwing darts at the board here but maybe uh big zd the dunbass isn't the only ass you gotta write my blood pressure's not great either he appears to be losing that war um i i saw someone break down like like what's been happening over the last week or 10 days and i guess there came a time when the russians had to choose a place to keep and a place to give up and the ukrainians moved to the place they gave up and now the russians are in danger of being encircled in the south and like it's it's looking like a real war now um where the now the ukrainians have pushed back a little bit and then winter's coming right so they don't know what kind of winter it's going to be though it could be like a sloggy slush fest that would favor the ukrainians or it could be like

or it could be ice cold which i don't know who that favors the same video that that i i watched a youtube video that were that had the same information that you're just giving so i heard that one thing i didn't hear though was about the encircling I heard the opposite that Russia couldn't hold all these fronts because they were too stretched out and as Ukraine takes their space they're naturally not stretched out anymore I don't know dick about war I saw the exact same video yeah yeah

okay yeah so it seemed to make sense to me we'll see how it plays out yeah I don't know I watch it from from reddit so it's just entertainment I suppose but i can't imagine having to fucking live there um like like especially if you're not some quasi neo-patriot you're just jimmy the baker and your wife's pregnant and you're you're not going to go fight in a war and leave your pregnant wife you're gonna stay right here and make sure she's safe but

every now and then a fucking rocket hits hits the street or like you know like like the bakery's closing like because like i don't know like how do you live your normal life that would be so crazy the pandemic's the close the pandemic first world has come to like uh you know dealing with shit like that or like our version of the first world there's a cnn guy for heeds a car how close am i can anyone do better i don't know i've never heard those words no idea okay you probably recognize his face and uh he's a pretty sober smart white guy right you didn't know and um anyway he went to keep and he was talking about his experience there and he's like okay first of all getting there was a nightmare it's not a normal fly-in they had to like go to poland or whatever but he's like once you're there on the surface it seems kind of normal the place isn't war-torn and he's showing like all the candies and goods you can buy at the store like these people

almost seem determined to live life normally in kiev but he's like right under the surface there's a kind of stress a a worry, a concern. There are soldiers out and about that you wouldn't normally have just walking the streets. And so that to me is the living experience that I'll just trust CNN. It's always a good policy tale. We'll back me up. Oh, yeah. But yeah, so I guess it's not wildly different in kiev anyway than it is normally i'm still

willing to take any bets on the length of the war i think we've still got 12 more months of war going um i don't count at an there might be a ceasefire along the way but like not a lengthy one so i don't count that as a loss the war won't be over for at least another year they'll get they'll they're both sides want to see how winter goes right you know yeah that thing about i what did i heard two things if winter's cold it makes it easier for the troops to move back and forth so ukraine or russia might make more moves if the ground is nice and frozen if the ground is soggy then you can expect the lines not to move a lot, but it's to Ukraine's advantage in that Germany has like, doesn't need the same heating problems that wouldn't have the same heating

problems that otherwise would if winter was warmer. Ah, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. That was a part of it as well. The, the,

the, the oil. Yeah. It's really cool to watch this thing go down. It's like a, it's like the plot from a movie or something. How long will it be until there's a movie about this? And will they have

Michael B. Jordan play Zelensky? Asking the real questions. Who's Michael B. Jordan? He's that young black guy who's a really good actor. Who's the guy that played Apollo Creed? That was Michael B. Jordan, right?

Yeah, he'd be perfect for Zelensky. I don't see why you'd choose anyone else. Let's Michael B. Jordan, right? Okay, yeah, he'd be perfect for Zelinsky. I don't see why you'd choose anyone else. Well, yeah. Let's recoup Will Smith. Let's bring his career back. I'm the only one that was on Will Smith's side. I don't... Dude, Will Smith...

I'm on an island by myself. You and Will are there. Not his wife, just Will and I. She threw him under the bus the bitch oh god it's worse than that it's like like when you get into like the nitty-gritty of that stuff it's it's real embarrassing like jesus christ will like you need to tell us your side of the story i need one of those teary balt barbara walters interviews where he explains himself to me because because i can't figure that guy out anymore I want my friend T-Mart to lend Will Smith a golden retriever

make his apology video yeah it was a gold hey guys like I am no what he just he's you don't want to make Mr. Bigglesworth sad, do you? I want to have Trevor back on this show. I really like Trevor. That was like the South Park where he's like rubbing his nipples like, we're sorry. Oh, do we have your CSGO money? I'm sorry.

Meanwhile, they're like adding on to the house in the background i think that dog passed which is really sad but i think i saw i totally forgot about that i remember when that like drama was going down and everything like trevor made a video and i'm pretty sure syndicate was just like he was just like new video with the zombie train today it's like oh that's that may have been the right move just forge ahead i remember this really well trevor was taking it on the chin pretty hard and syndicate i think was already on vacation so he didn't see any reason to like insert himself in the line of fire he just continued to enjoy his vacation if if i recall correctly oh kyle's having tech issues i

guess but um yeah so in the hindsight and i feel like trevor's famous for that controversy and people forgot syndicate was even a part of it uh people forget that i think that's definitely like memed right to the high hell is that photo but um i definitely think people tie both of them to it. People definitely forget the other like the amount of actual like I'll call them like run less than safely counterstrike gambling sites, among other things that were rampant in the streaming world is insane. Like there are so many streamers, both current and past, that did all of that and then some. So it's just like the internet's got a short mind right or short memory and so if you it is literally the truth about being canceled is you can't get canceled if you just don't let it happen so like if you just don't do it then like it's okay like that's eventually people will forget move on whatever like there is a time

limit to that so i mostly believe you i'm not sure who's the red pill guy who just got banned off everything oh andrew tate i'm sorry there's a different you know what i'm saying i'm not saying genuinely awful people i just mean like uh i just mean like for the most part you can really survive anything that the internet throws at you if you just don't care but it's hard not to care a lot of people self-cancel they do it all the time i on the on the highest levels like al franken this is a long time ago but he like gave up his senate seat because he touched a woman's flak jacket boo hover oh he didn't even touch he might have touched a little we've actually went back and forth on this whether he touched

or hovered and uh and the age of the. It was just a bad look for a senator to have an unconscious woman and then you're mock groping her at best. 100% agreed. Having said that, if he was just like, look, I get it. Okay, do it, but no pics.

At the time I was a comedian, I was a bit of a dumbass. I apologize. Let's move on. And if he didn't self-cancel he'd probably still be a senator yeah yeah yeah yeah i agree i agree yeah it's bad look again i'm not 100 sure if he's touching i'm not either and that's the problem i know i know he shouldn't be doing this there's one thing I'm certain on. This isn't a good look. See, this is something he should be doing with no pictures, just for the love of the game.

If any of us put a loved one in that black jacket, we're immediately upset. Yes. Also, the thing I didn't realize at first when this happened, that's kind of a political opponent. She is a conservative reporter that has been no friend of Al Franken's. And now that she's in a vulnerable position, he's kind of mocking her in her sleep. And that makes it more evil to me. You know what would have been okay?

If he did this instead, like I'm going to strangle you. That's okay. If he raises his hands up five, six inches and rotates them outward, like he's going to strangle her, nobody cares. It's kind of like a why I oughta.

What if he did one of these? That's okay, too. He could have photoshopped a black eye and posed like he was boxing. What I'm hearing is you're okay with violence, but not acts of love, you see. The world is. The world is much more okay with some silliness.

I mean, look, we had the Three Stooges where these guys would goof around and make violence funny, but we never had the rape version of the Three Stooges where they'd ask Pepe Le Pew and fuck someone forcibly. That never happened. There's a big difference. That does get rid of the levity of it. Yeah.

He's grabbing a woman's breast and she's not enjoying it. She's trying to get away on she's trying to get away she's like spinning her feet in oil as she tries to escape she's slipping in oil pulling him back onto a leaf actually maybe this is a good idea

there's a semi interesting piece of Trump news so Trump was accused of sexual assault of some sort I think he like forcefully pushed on a woman and kissed her or something. Allegedly, whatever. Moved on her. Moved on her. I forget her name.

I wish I could get it right. Anyway, he's the one that she's the one where he famously said, really me, her? She's not my type. Right. That was his defense that this woman is not his type. Having said that, she totally was. At the time, she was young, pretty, and blonde but um so she's not anymore but at the time this is a long time ago and the statute of limitations something happened in new york that enables her to sue him for this

sexual assault from a long time ago limitations yeah so now she's suing trump personally and he's going to be deposed about it i think but and he's gonna by the way she has the physical evidence i don't know what it is is it come on a dress or something oh trump could provide a dna test and clear his name but he hasn't for years now she's been doing this she dogged him through his whole presidency she dogged him through his campaign the first one that's not to give those things any credence at all but i see yeah yeah so i don't know i think he knows what's on the dress so is it a dress thing or i guess we don't know maybe he's got a condom it's like it's like heinz ketchup that has his spit mixed in he's like this his KFC family bucket. Yeah, literally.

I just think it's interesting. He pissed on her. Right? I hope it's pee. I hope it's pee more than anything. I hope it's a fork from a KFC because he's the only person who's ever used a fork with KFC. Not even a spork.

Where did you even get this from the back? Carol said he knocked her head against a wall, down her tights and briefly penetrated her before she swiftly pushed him off and ran out of the store that's worse than my memory had like a woodpecker like he was just on her that fast briefly penetrated i got the impression he didn't finish from reading that but i well you never don't she makes it sound like he like like attacked her cock first you know what i mean yeah yeah right look um maybe he did i don't fucking know donald trump but uh i i seems like politicians in particular get uh uh accused of this stuff a lot and there's a lot of money to be made on both sides of it like the accusation and books and all that stuff so I hope

it does get deposed though because anytime he gets forced to speak it's fun and I hope he gets cleared of it though because I have a lot of money riding on this guy dude I love that you just doubled down president do we have a bet what's our bet ah who can say which one i feel like

kyle either said he would be president again or he would i think the competitor so i don't do that more i saw a poll that got me all excited they're like trump dropped five more points in public approval or whatever some rating and i'm like dude that's a significant drop etc but it wasn't like he was at like 35 and desantis his second best was at 19 like he's still nearly double i don't think i don't think desantis is like everything trump is but like wetter like a more like a shitty somehow less charismatic and shittier version. I don't know. Maybe I don't pay attention too much to DeSantis,

but at least I could conceptualize how my dad would get into Trump in general, versus DeSantis. I'm like, what the fuck? DeSantis isn't even funny. He's not funny. He's not. Not at all.

I kind of like that they're flying DeSantis isn't even funny. He's not funny. He's not. Not at all. I like that they're flying and busing those migrants up north, though. That's really funny to me. I like it a lot. That's the other guy, though, right? That's both of them. That's Rick Scott and DeSantis and the governor of New Mexico, I believe, or Arizona.

I don't know which. Here's what happened governor abbott from texas had these migrants that's who it is de santa sent a venezuelan to texas to do what's called bird dogging which is to say hello my fellow countrymen why don't you get on this plane i have a better life for you and he tricked 50 people into getting in a plane where they took them to Florida. And then they tricked them again, saying, we're going to take you to Boston, where they had the facilities, the jobs, et cetera. We're lining you up. By the way,

these people are in Texas legally. They're not illegally married. That's still in question. Okay. I've been told that they're legally. Look, I'm only as good as my school. But apparently they're asylum seekers. so their status is they're currently legal but they might get kicked out later if asylum's not granted but they're currently legal so they take these they're probation appropriate fine i'll accept yeah i can i can line up with that but they're not like on line to get deported or anything like they're just seeking asylum and they're there legally and they're going to the place where it happens they just haven't gotten in line yet they're they're they're there they've seeked asylum they're going for their stuff they're not like it's not like they snuck in and

got jobs and living under the radar that's not what's up they're there legally trying to hopefully the process works for them all right so anyway they take them from texas they put them in florida they take them from florida they tell them that they're taking them to boston but they don't instead they fly them to martha's vineyard which is a net positive in my head like i think that's a better place to end up you know it's very nice it's a better place to live yeah better like you know the rich people in martha's vineyard got that turned around in no time they were like we love immigrants we love them and they're like bring in the military and get them out of there i thought that was like i thought that was the republican uh uh governor or whatever but like

i just know we wanted this for border towns not our multi-million dollar mansion neighborhood yeah it depends who you listen to like the people the left is like look they greeted them with open arms they gave them food they gave them shelter they gave them the supplies they needed and then they moved them to a town which i think was boston still in massachusetts at first it was a military base at first they like housed them they had the national guard they like i got them the fuck out of there well they did get them out but the left tells the story as then we move them to a place that was more able to accommodate them instead of this small island with 15 000 people on it that's isn't prepared to receive 50 immigrants cool cool the

right is like oh they you know they're these hypocrites immediately deported them to somewhere else in the same state i mean i like i i said on pkn i thought the whole like shipping people around was performative and embarrassing and stupid but like no like that that point seems salient to me where a bunch of rich people in martha's vineyard who don't actually really connect with the outside world are like yeah bring in more people more people more people and then they end up in their neighborhood and immediately literally the military the national guard is called in to remove them so yeah that they're right about that like that is hypocritical like a border town with working class people is better equipped and has more resources to support these people than Martha's Vineyard.

There's not a politician for us, though. See, what I want is a Florida governor who ships illegals to the north, but via high speed rail. Okay. That's how Japan would do it. That's how theapan would do it that's how that's how the germans would have done it it wouldn't have costed 50 million dollars or 12 million dollars or however much it costs that's the fund of money he has to keep doing this i don't know what it costs to send 50 or 80 or whatever you sent i do but that's like a drop in the bucket compared to his $12 million illegal shooting business.

He spends something like $12,000 a person to ship them up there. An outrageous amount, but nothing like the $12 million that is the whole fund. Yeah, he can send 1,000 at that rate. Yes, he can send 1,000 people to Martha's Vineyard with the money he has set aside for this. Population's

only 1,500. So DeSantis is being... It could be 1,600. It's actually 15,000. But we'll arm them! There's no guns up there. Oh, so DeSantis is being sued personally for human trafficking.

Apparently it's a not clever idea to ship illegal immigrants to Lawyer Island. We have a bunch of virtue signaling attorneys in Martha's Vineyard now who are defending these poor people. Pro bono, I'm sure. What if they charge us poor Venezuelans? All right, what do you guys got? Mr. Goldstein doesn't work for pennies.

Give me those teeth. It's a vineyard, you know, guys. Yeah, it is a vineyard it's like a piece of string get to work these grapes aren't going to pick themselves damn it yeah I don't know I still think it's funny I don't care that he gets sued it's not like they're going to lock him up or something he's going to keep doing it

I think it's funny I just think it's funny and I hope it keeps happening it's the same thing as Trump right I just think it's funny I don't think it's funny. And I hope it keeps happening. It's the same thing as Trump, right? I just think it's funny. I don't think it matters who the president is, really. I think there's enough people who are out there to be checks and balances. It just really doesn't matter. We're going to get the same bullshit.

Where you want to be is like head of the CIA. Yeah, that guy probably gets to make some decisions. I don't know. That guy's probably stressed. Is that who's running the ship, after all? Zach, show us a picture of the head of the CIA. Yeah, that guy probably gets to make some decisions. I don't know. That guy's probably stressed. He's running the ship after all. Zach, show us a picture of the head of the CIA. Taylor, we'll call him out real quick. If he's fat.

I mean, think about all the goodies you get being the head of the CIA. Does anyone ever say no to you? Ever? He would have got out of room for $1.50. That guy owns the hotel. See, that guy gets to do whatever he wants.

Yeah, he looks like he sits down and deeply sighs at least a couple times between meal bites like he's he looks very tired i'm not sure he's thrilled to be the head of the cia it's not like all i don't know like how many perks you can't like walk into costco without a card and be like no guys i'm the head of the cia i'm gonna shop here i bet you know i bet that would fall under his purview i bet he he could go and get a $1.50 hot dog. With no membership card? I don't know. If he walks in with a couple guys with earpieces, black sunglasses.

Oh, I'm sure, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'd be flanked by eight of those guys 24-7. We don't need to look at him for that long. Where were we before we went down that weird avenue i don't know i don't know we're talking about your bet on trump oh no that didn't happen uh yeah i bet a bunch of people um basically i took trump to win the presidency against the field before he'd even said he was going to run um and i still think it's the best bet the the safest bet. You wouldn't pick anybody against me, like one individual. There's no one else who's more likely, even with all this legal stuff, than Donald Trump, I think, right now.

Yeah, I don't think there's anyone who's a bigger favorite than Trump unless you count the field collectively. The field collectively. The idea of a second person is what he's running against, really. Because, you know, I really think of Biden as a weak, weak candidate at this point, like doing it a second time. And we've seen, like, it's difficult for a young man. It was difficult for Obama. You know, it's such a, although last time he hid in the bunker and he won, maybe he could do that again. Trump beat himself.

And I wouldn't be surprised if Trump beat himself again. I think if I gave Trump a mic right now, he'd just talk about me, me, me, me, me. I won the election. I'm the greatest. I'm uniquely qualified for this. I'm me, me, me, me, me. Not not a word about what he's going to do for you. Just about the shit he hates and about how people are treating him unfairly. And I don't think that wins elections. I mean, I don't see much from him anymore because he's doing his rallies he's doing his rallies again but like the main thing i see from him every time is like

the election was a lie it wasn't true and it's like like you gotta fucking get over it man like you're you're coming off like a loser like you're coming off like a sour grapes loser like that doesn't play well i watched some of his rally the other day and um shit i don't remember him directly talking about i think he brought up hunter's laptop at some point that's a good topic that's a good topic like that topic can work we talked briefly about trump on hannity and you're like he's right he's right i think you were talking about declassifying documents but here's what else he said. The way the FBI came in so aggressively, Trump has a theory. He's like, they wouldn't bring in all those people.

They wouldn't come in so hard, unannounced, the way that they did, the aggressive tactics, unless, and this is what people are saying. People are saying they were secretly looking for Hillary's emails at Mar-a- i read the quote prove that no no oh my god he's right that's that's why they did it they wanted hillary's this explains it all so we don't need to worry about play duh did he reveal if they may have found did he have them what nonsense and hannity is like wait are you saying that you have them no no no no just people are saying that that's what they were looking for that's how it goes back he might as well have said the holy grail or something even more ridiculous like i might have believed that i love that there's like physical like a physical data drive with like a terabyte of just text files of

emails. And there's just like getting passed around by like Jason Statham, the back of an Audi. He added that. He's like, it's out there somewhere that it exists. They're just looking for it. Like,

I don't know. Definitely. Holy grail. Some MacGuffin out there. Some like full of Hillary's emails. Well, shit. I don't know. I don't seem likely. I'm i'm gonna go out on a limb say unlikely i look forward to the campaign

because um anytime you've got that all those powerful people in those millions and billions of dollars like moving around and it's time to pick a new head poobah it's fun to see what what they go with because so often it's it's like bad's like, oh, they don't know. They thought Sarah Palin was a good idea. A whole team of people got together and picked Sarah Palin and everybody was like, oh, you know, she's real dumb, eh?

Well, they needed someone nice to pair with McCain because McCain always sucked. Well, then she wasn't the answer she wasn't the answer mccain was losing clearly so they were like do we choose someone who's kind of status quo and hope for the best or do we roll the dice and they rolled the dice and temporarily it worked when people first met her in the whole hockey mom rottweiler lipstick joke and stuff. Yeah, yeah. Like, she killed it.

Yeah, she did. It was pitbull. And McCain briefly got a boost out of it, but then over time she didn't really do a good job and it dragged him down. I think – I didn't remember it as a partner up a nice with a bad. I remembered it as, hey, we're losing.

Let's try something. And I like the move. Don't just keep doing what you were doing and lose. Yeah, I look forward to seeing the campaign. I hope there's lots of nonsense. I hope there's more accusations. And I hope Trump continues to fucking curse

at his rallies, which is great. I'm going to go to the next one. I don't think Biden's running. I don't think he should. I don't think he will. I don't think. I think running i don't think he should i don't think he will um i don't think i think right now if they but if you i'm pretty sure if you just look at it on both ends of the spectrum it is first place is biden or trump and then well i'm sorry first place confirmed i'm voting for is biden and trump remove that and it is first place literally anyone anybody at all and then then Biden and Trump in second place.

And that is a prevalent thought. Here's my dumbass. I think Gavin Newsom goes up against DeSantis, and that's the next two nominees. Is Gavin Newsom very popular? He's the California governor. Do you like him? I don't know that he's super popular.

I mean, he is more popular than people who don't live here think he is. A lot of people think like, oh, my God, he's running that shit into the ground. At least from most people around here, he's just a really safe, moderate, like, read centralist character. character but he's still a democrat air quotes a lot of people are pissed off because he did the whole like uh dinner at french laundry during lockdown type shit where you know he's like you know going to parties and stuff so that definitely pissed people off but he's he's more popular than like michael bloom or whoever the hell it tried to run for a governor here yeah that guy

who like put in billions of dollars of his own money and everyone's like we don't like you yeah it was the funniest thing he switched to democrat like two two months prior and then was like i'm gonna spend a hundred million dollars of my own money to campaign and he did not win so i what a loss it's cool when someone has a hundred million to blow. Like. Right. They were just like, you know what? I'm going to take a flyer on this.

I'm going to drop a hundred million into a hobby of mine. It is. It's also like seeing like Trump, Bloomberg, like billionaires running, being like, I need your money, folks. It's like, you guys don't like you really don't like donating to bloomberg like isn't blue i i guess comparing bloomberg and trump are billion both billionaires in the same way that someone worth a hundred million dollars and someone worth one million are both millionaires because i'm pretty sure trump's like three billion which is like low tier billionaire and bloomberg is like what like

80 billion like real deal something like that yeah yeah but bloomberg i think is the wealthiest person in new york yeah he could like he could buy and sell trump not even notice i like i would imagine yes yeah i guess bad comparison bloomberg doesn't need money the way the way trump needs it a lot of trump's wealth i think is not very liquid i mean he owns real estate which is so he's wealthy but you know how much can he put his hands on i'm not sure but um i forgot i don't remember bloomberg taking a lot in donations i think he's self-funded if i recall but i saw this tweet it was like one of the things i like about joe biden is he never asked me to pay his legal fees i'm'm like, true. We have to pay his medical bills. All their medical bills.

That's true. And all these people have a lot of them. I don't know if you guys have been following some of the stuff that's been going on with educators in our neighbor to the north, Canada. Nope. But there's two great images. One that we can show and one we can't.

I linked one of them there. This is a teacher, a TDSB teacher who identifies as an otherkin furry. It's photographed here teaching in their fursuit. The Toronto District School Board is facing backlash over the incident just days after photos emerged of a Halton teacher wearing enormous fake breasts. Now, that's the picture I can't show you, unfortunately. But if you guys want to, you definitely want to Google that picture. So what do I have to Google here?

Because that is a shop teacher. Halton teacher, huge boobs. Yep, yep. Okay, so this team. Oh, my. I have seen this picture. I didn't realize. So she's been teaching shop class

with those nipples like fully exposed like through the the cloth and they're huge like like if you're for those of you are dumb enough not to have already googled it each one is as big as a small child and and and there's video the kids will like sneak their cell phones out as anyone would because it's got to be a huge joke and then and like there's a video of her operating a chop saw and and she she has to like move her tit out of the way she's like you gotta be careful with these i was gonna say they're a shop hazard they're a workplace no what is in there it's not these are right actually anime boobs no they're made out they're silicon they're like silicon um they're they're specifically if they're really high quality they're specifically made to just basically sit on your chest kind of

like a body plate almost they're molded to you and i know it's because i literally uh was at a place where somebody was like you want to feel my tits i was like hell yeah let's see what these things are like they're you know say no yeah yeah never say no how'd they feel uh they felt like you'd expect like silicon fake tits like you know but like but like they were just you know i i don't know those are those are so like what's the point that's like those are insane like that's number one shop hazard kyle's right number two like those are so absurdly big and out there that's like that's like just a form of exhibitionism like yes like yeah it comes off totally as exhibitionism like you're just wanting everyone to look at that

all day like what the fuck like no no no no i have the real answer okay i think she's pulling a mr garrison she's being as ridiculously awful as she can while not breaking any rules until they fire her so she can sue them in Canada they cannot fire her they can't if they do she's

pulling a Mr. Garrison I hope so much it's a Mr. Garrison what do I have to do to get fired I'm sucking dick up here do you remember that episode where he's like oh yeah all the parents are clapping and he's like i'm a proud gay man and that means i like to get my dick sucked by other man sometimes in front of your children like he's just like all these things and he's just trying to get them and they just keep applauding. What the hell's going on?

I'm being a fucking perv in front of their kids and they're clapping me. Yeah, it's become reality now. Unless, like, this is just a big troll and I've been bamboozled, but no, those both appear to be real stories. They seem like joke stories. I thought the furry was pretty hot. You know what? I'm more okay.

The furry is not even a sexual thing. Don't you judge me? In my head, I would be distracting. Yeah, it would be distracting. Both of those are distracting. Especially in gym class. He's like leading

in a game of fucking dodgeball. That guy in the furry suit smells like shit. You can't understand what he's saying. Guaranteed. That's what I'm saying. If you can't understand what he's saying and he's not mic'd up, then it's a learning issue. Dude, take your fucking wolf head off, you lunatic!

He starts growling at you. Then you have to go to the principal for upsetting him you have to approach your teacher with an open palm is it a closed closed that's why he attacked you you spooked him uh dude we haven't talked about Brett Favre yet. Oh, my God. What a... He's my champion. I heard a take on this.

So, here, if people don't know anything about Brett Favre, I have his thing. So, I guess he worked with the governor of Mississippi. Mississippi has something called the Department of Human Services, and they are to take care of, like, basically poor people. They call them at- residents cool two payments went to farve or payments supported by farve one was speaking fees of 1.1 million dollars and you might think like all right well maybe it seems like a lot that is better be a really good speech for 1.1 million dollars nay nay it was a no show

speaking fee so he didn't have to give the speech to get the 1.1 million dollars that would have otherwise gone to poor people from mississippi yep straight into bet far's pocket the other thing was five million dollars and that went to his daughter's school where she plays volleyball. Brett Favre was under the impression that she needed a better volleyball facility to show off her talents. And they donated $5 million that was supposed to go to Etnid Residence. Instead, it went to Brett Favre's daughter's volleyball court. That's been a nice volleyball court because i'm thinking five million can do that thing better be state-of-the-art yeah really i thought five million was just the you know a

starter fee five million dollar building look like why are they not doing it in the basketball it's five million dollars in in in in mississippi and so you're not like it's mississippi not adanistan right no i'm but it's not california either yeah i'm, it's Mississippi, not Afghanistan. Right. No, but it's not California either. Yeah. I'm saying it's like land value is not a, is not a problem. Right. So it's all material costs. $5 million material costs and labor is like, that's your nowadays.

That'll get you. That's like what my bathroom renovations costing. I mean, can we find out? I'm sure. I'll leave. I'll leave. Daughter's volleyball facility. In any case, the dude stole six million dollars from poor

people and he's in these text messages with the governor where he's like hey uh the media nobody's gonna know where this money came from right because it would you know and the governor's like hey i understand why you'd be a little concerned about that no worries nobody will ever know and i'm sitting here like on my toilet reading that message like y'all fucked up like that's the outside zach if you can go to my picture it'll show the holy shit unless you have one and he built a temple to volleyball dude the inside looks dope too that's a photoshop dude that literally looks that literally looks like somebody said how do we spend $5 million on volleyball? Not here's $5 million worth of volleyball stuff.

Look at that court. Oh my. That now, look at that. Three. Oh man. No money went to the volleyball imagery here. Dude, that is a really nice facility. It looks like I found a rendering.

I thought it was real when I showed it to him. Yeah, it's a rendering, but still, I'm sure it looks like this more or less. How much is Brett Favre worth? It's shocking to me that this man... It's not that he can't afford the $6 million donation. Instead, he was like, well, I don't actually want

to do that, but I would like to flex my pull because what other reason could you have for siphoning money from that specific group of people like he has some sort of fucking illicit deal with the governor to get free fucking welfare money he's worth a hundred million dollars and he had to get another million for his own pocket it and and so the thing i'll mention about him saying are we gonna get caught for this basically i'm paraphrasing you know are people going to find out is his defense is i had no idea where the money was coming from i you know i

thought it was a speaking fee like i don't know i don't really pay close attention but it turns out he was personally texting like what if people learn about what we're doing so he knew exactly what he was doing yeah now here's the thing seven million dollars a year and he's making it eight yeah now here's the thing seven million dollars a year and he's making it eight yeah espn is barely covering this i haven't even seen it on the news much i see it on reddit a little bit and it hit me but it's not like getting plastered wall to wall when michael vick ran dog fighting facilities right and he's personally responsible for like seven or eight dogs dying and he kind of funded it he wasn't you know nothing he was the guy it was wall-to-wall coverage it was everywhere espn was talking about it abc nbc nbc whatever i mean that that makes sense to me because like one story

is like very easy to spin to make the public care like it's harder to get the public to care about like a misappropriation of funds because this this shit happens all the time, unfortunately. If there's photos of abused dogs, that's going to sell. That's going to fly. Also, Michael Vick was at the peak of his career. He had just been on the cover of fucking Madden 2004. He was killing it. We, the Falcons, were very proud of him.

He was so fast. The dude was like benching 500 pounds. It's like a running back that could throw. He's faster than a running him. He was so fast. The dude was like benching 500 pounds. It's like a running back that could throw. He's faster than a running back. He was incredible. He was so, he was, I don't remember what his 40 times were, but they're absurd. Faster than pit bulls.

And that not quite. That caught up with him. And like they started showing all the like, they showed it warts and all. Like there's ways for media to cover when a person that they kind of like does a bad thing and then there's ways to like throw somebody they're like these are the rape stands they're a big part of of this style of underground dog fighting where you tie the female down and and have her raped repeatedly by the male and it's

like that has nothing to do with that's like just a part of breeding dogs whether you like it or not i don't i don't like breeding you know that whole industry but like i think it's a legal thing i don't think it's animal abuse but they're like zooming in on these things and somebody's like standing next to it the poor dog would be placed here and like breaking down dog rape and i'm sitting there like man this is they're gonna kill this guy by the time it's over they really threw him under the bus i've had that thought too like i i've wondered like i'm wondering i've had the thought that you did look misappropriation of funds a guy who's been retired for i don't know 12 years more uh is not the same sexy story that dog murder is but i do wonder like is it not it should get more

attention than it has he is a shitty story i hate it it makes me know that he's a piece of shit because i think there was a thing a while back where he was like sending dick pics to other women finally was married or something reporters he got a reporter literally canned and like blacklisted because and denied all the allegations stuff that you came out on it. Denied. Yeah. This requires a trip to Bing. I want to see what it takes.

And so we know he's a bit of a piece of shit already, but this is really scummy. It's Mississippi, right? I want to say I've seen him in his Wrangler commercials like repping his hometown and stuff and talking about all that and like man to be stealing money from the poorest citizens of your home state the people who like need to eat i don't know it's it's going it's food out of port as far as like actual i heard it called welfare money like yeah as far as like actual negative impact brett farve did a lot more

negative it's just like as far as the ability to get people to care about to say like people care so much about abused animals yeah i don't like it either viscerally i'm glad they got him yeah i'm i you know it really you know ruined a couple of the falcons for a generation really like we're on we still haven't recovered from those brett farve was responsible for destroying the falcons for a long time uh no michael vick oh michael vick yeah michael vick brett farve didn't do the falcons any favors either hey yeah i don't remember us having any real issues with with the with them ever uh but uh but no it i just remember i think he had killed several of the dogs with his bear like he drowned them in a bucket i want i think that was a thing michael vick had been drowning dogs and buckets which is ghoulish like why wouldn't you shoot them um like some people

might like be like that's ghoulish but like i don't know that's that's how you put animals down when they're like broken and sick and dying you get them out of their misery as quick i would rather be shot than drowned in a bucket oh 100 oh you're gonna die on that hill huh yeah easy pick is that really brett farve's dick his dick sucks oh yeah i saw it too that dick sucks but when i binged it myself i got some better dicks but i wasn't 100 i remember like i remember seeing the pictures of his dick and being like dude the the potential roi here is not good like you. You're getting ladies because of your arm, my friend. Not because of what you got here. Send him a picture of your bank account, not your penis.

What are you doing? Show that you have an extra million dollars that you didn't have before. Show her a fucking pool in another country that you're sitting at. Don't show her your little dick. In his case, especially. He can get you to a pool in another country that you're sitting at, don't show her your little dick. In his case, especially. He can get you

to a pool in another country. That's so scummy. I don't like that he's stealing money from poor people. Do good white collar crime. Steal money from corporations. Or from the government.

I used to be in accounts payable. You have to understand, understand when you're in accounts payable there are invoices coming to your company constantly just raining in invoice after invoice after invoice and you are measured by how quickly you turn these around like you've got to pay these invoices on time i've always wondered why don't more people send invoices to companies? Just be like, you know what? I've heard stories of it working. I've heard stories of people doing it. It works a lot, and apparently that's fraud.

That's fraud? Who knew? Apparently they keep track of this sort of thing. It's like a profit margin, and they're like, where's this money? I was like 19 when I had, maybe 21 when i had this job if people just sent me random invoices you might you might have made some money i wasn't very good i think it's true of a lot of companies i think if you send them an invoice and like you make

yourself look like a vendor that would be in the like if it's a construction company and you call yourself woody's tile woody you know woody's greek tile they'll be like oh 1800 for woody's greek tile yeah okay yeah we're doing those condos on the east side sure clickety-clickety-clack like 1800 a drop in the bucket of some you know what i bet would work well company what i bet would work well for that is like a fake pest control company like you just send people pest control invoices like to random hotel chain no but you need to do it you need to do external only because then they're like why didn't see them oh yeah we just did routine spray around every three months you know that's smart this

is signed up for we got to remove this part from the show guys we're joking we can tell jokes we we all go to jail over like 800 dollars well tucker woody and taylor all agreed it was kyle's idea yeah i mean he's already familiar with with that wonderful facility in Alabama. Oh, my God. Oh, so I was thinking about I'm going to get my girlfriend an Xbox for her birthday. Nice. And I had to, like, Amazon has this thing where it's like, hey, you want an Xbox? And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ask nicely. And I was like, what the fuck? And I, like, clicked the button or whatever. I'm like, all right, we'll get back to you. And it was like, what the fuck? And I clicked the button or whatever. I'm like, alright, we'll get back to you. I think they're gonna weigh me. I don't know what they're weighing right now, but they're deciding right now whether I get one or not. They're literally going

to... I think for everyone. I'm not special. I think it's just a thing. If you want to buy an Xbox, they're like, yeah, we'll see what we can do. You know what? I wonder if it's the Xbox Series X or something. There's an X and an S. One of them's white and cheap, and the other's black and tall.

That's the one you want, the big black one. Okay, $775 for this thing. $500 on Amazon. That's what you want to pay. So I'm wondering if they're checking your loyalty. I promise, we'll find the $500 one. That is a loyalty thing. It's like buying a Porsche.

They're like, you or Ferrari, you have any ferraris in your garage before no well fuck you all right let's get this guy over here he's got none of them i'm hoping i went to it and by the way you'll have a hard time finding a more loyal amazon customer than me i get amazon packages six days a week yeah on a slow week and uh it says request invitation yep so it'll be interesting to see if they give you one and they don't give me one um you can just pass it on to me that'll be great but here's what i'm gonna do here's what i'm gonna do i'm gonna do i'm gonna play xbox games with my mouse and keyboard because you can plug that shit right into that thing and that thing

does 4k 60 fps on like triple a titles uh so i'm sure it'll do you know lower those things down playing a 1080p monitor i'm getting 100 i think it does 120 or 130 frames maybe more it's like a cheap gaming pc that's as far as consoles go it's apparent i have the black cube one and it's pretty powerful i'm gonna um play the new cod a lot and i think i might do it that way i might use that thing as like a gaming PC and shit on console kids with my mouse and keyboard. You should. Just have fun teeing off on kids getting used to the

controller. I got inspired by somebody's YouTube video where they were like, if you use a mouse and keyboard on Xbox, you are literally a cheater. And I was like, really? They were like, it is a massive advantage, and you are going around the way the game was even designed and i'm like really you're not dissuading kyle at all

you know i would imagine you would get is it called auto assist aim assist and i'll turn that off awesome mouse you won't get aim assist if you plug in your xbox or plug in your shit to it it's not true one-to-one like it does it acts as if your mouse is now a controller and not as if you are using a mouse and keyboard so i know it sounds weird but it does not feel as good it's the same shit with when you're using like the zim so uh which was that like plug in your keyboard or your keyboard mouse that everybody used for years so you think it feels worse? I had this imagination that it would be a mouse with aim assist that it would suck you

on target. Woody, why would that ever happen? Everybody would use that then. Because the controller has aim assist and that's what Kyle's saying that everyone uses it. Yeah, but nobody would do it. No, it doesn't work that way. Maybe Xbox doesn't differentiate whether using a controller or... Well, it's not how it works, I promise.

I want it to work that way. I know you do. It's not going to be like playing Halo on PC and you're like, wow, I'm incredible. It's like... That's exactly what I want it to be like. I want to be able to keep my head... And everybody's goofing around with those jiggly-ass thumbs. I want everyone else to have to play with a Guitar Hero controller.

Well, I have a... I saw a guy playing Cod with a flute. He's like... He's slowly moving the crosshairs. Really crazy. Back in the day when people would use the guitar hero stuff i thought that was ridiculous but a flute might be the the weirdest way i've seen somebody do it so far a flute is the coolest i like that yeah i'm looking forward to that new cod um i've seen some like i don't know pros and cons to it like like people don't like there's no dead silence

people don't like uh that sounds i saw a field upgrade field upgrade what is that you just he really seems to know no i want to know uh you i was just i was just playing it before we got but you get it you get it every uh like you earn it over time so it's like every like two and a half minutes but you can get upgrades get you can get perks to give it to you fast or whatever but yeah you get it like once every like minute, two minutes. It's not bad. Okay. Because I saw a video where you were tweeting out something like,

we're not bringing back Dead Silence. It's just perpetually earned like throughout playing and completing objectives in games. So as far as I know. So it's just, yeah, it's still a thing. Can I repeat and tell me if I have it right? So about a minute or two into the game, you get dead silence for the rest of the game. No,

you get it for, you get it and then it's like 15 or 20 second activation that you use specifically for like, ah, finally I can flank now. You can save it up in search. So if you play search and destroy, you don't have a first round. You might get it in the middle of the second round and then you can use it at any point or you can just you know use it and then get it again

later on so it's like uh yeah it's an interesting way to use it because like completely without it is no good and completely with it is no good either the footsteps are far too loud and they turn them down they're so loud it is truly a game that just, you are not, unless you're just like Adderall out of your mind, you're not running around corners and just like, yeah, because you can hear somebody. It's a lot of processing to do.

No, it's just like very, footsteps are very loud. So it's very, and it's good audio. So you can hear where they're coming from, how far until they get to the door, just sit there, aim. And then it's like,

time to kill is very quick. Not too quick in my opinion, but like you can't fight back if you're getting scared. No, it looks good to me. I'm, I'm,

I want to play the battle Royale. It's not called blackout anymore. Is it something? No war zone war zone. Okay. Yeah. I want to play that. I want to play that.

I always liked those. And what's the Tarkov like mode called DMZ? Have you tried it? No. And we don't know much, I've played Warzone 2 which is just Warzone, just new map like terminals in Warzone 2

and like Strike and some other like fan favorites, Dome Yeah, I saw some gameplay, it looks good But the DMZ, we don't know much about it, nobody's played it that I know of and I hope it's like the Tarkov-esque you know, experience but I truly it's like the Tarkov-esque experience, but I truly do not know.

I have no idea. Okay. I'm glad that you're here. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I'm interested in that mode as well. I don't know. I haven't played multiplayer COD in so long.

Nobody has. It just seems so monotonous. Nobody. I don't know what I'm doing. It's not fun anymore. The era, I've said so many times that for me and for a lot of people, you can see it with the emergence of Battle Royale, the era of especially non-persistent lobbies where you get in

and you play 10 to 15 minutes. The games are shorter than that. It's now 7 to 10 minutes of gameplay. And basically it's for what? To what end are you doing this? You're not ranking up. There is going to be rank play later on, but you're not ranking up.

You're just like, what's the point of doing this with your friends playing the same over and over and over short form games versus battle royales for me or story or 40 minute long Counter-Strike games? You have a lot more interaction and there's a reason to go back. It feels less mind-numbingly repetitive, I think.

No, I agree 100%. You know what? I've been thinking, I know Tarkov's going to add the arena mode, but they really need to add is wager matches. That's what, no, exactly the same way that RuneScape, I'm gonna, I love RuneScape. RuneScape literally has the same thing where they have

the wilderness, you have the game, right? You can play, but you can go out into the wilderness and you can PVP. It is a free-for-all kind of like there are rules, but it's basically like if you want to go PVP, consider that normal Tarkov, but they have arenas where you go up and you stake. You basically find somebody,

you agree to things that you bet, you both agree on the things that are wagered. You go in, you play, the winner automatically gets what's wagered and you can do that forever. It's so much that forever it's so much fun because it's completely safe and like more fair pvp do you know do you know how popular it would be on twitch if you had if you had like the top streamers playing like high stakes wager

match free-for-alls let's just say where they jump on some sort of an arena style map with with eight other with seven other players and everybody has put up like 1.2 million. Like rubles in game, you know? And we're going to play first, second, and third. And five people just lost 1.2 million. And like a million of it's prize pool and two million of it just goes poof or whatever, however they want to play that game.

It might be a hacker's paradise, but I still love the concept. Well, a hacker's paradise, sure. A booster's paradise, sure. Like illegal hackers paradise but i still love the concept well a hackers paradise sure a boosters paradise sure at like a legal account trading right but i think that just because like they've already taken a lot of effort to like reduce the amount of like flow of money through traders and are through the flea market and shit i think that i would just simply be happy with um uh two options bring whatever gear you'd like you don't

lose it it's just pvp maybe you lose ammo maybe your gun gets damaged but like you don't lose your gear and then i would also like the opposite uh give us both standardized gear and let me see who the better pvp is when you flatten the level the right i i agree standardized gear is easier to do than you think in tarkov i mean like, there's always a meta for the tier 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6 armors. There's one that's the best one, and you just throw that on everybody. You know, AKs, you could have generalized kits. Use it for weapon tech.

I mean, I find it hard to believe that Tarkov, that they get a normal amount of feedback on new weapons before they put them into the game. It's slow and stuff, but the amount and the rate that new weapons add, like get added to the game. What better way to stress test the balance of that weapon and how it performs than literally getting people only using that gun in the arena so you can get, you know, more data versus like waiting for somebody to find the mutant. Now we know that the entire wipe we have to wait for us to like change the mutant because it's too strong now i really like the idea of staying because there's grenade launchers in the game yeah grenade launchers in a 1v1 like say you go to factory are going to be op awful yeah and that's how like you could literally do factory 1v1 or you could do like you could make these uh

the these experiences way more enjoyable to me as a player than you would if you were doing it in Call of Duty or Halo or any of the games that I grew up playing in the first place. I saw Landmark say this. You don't want to make it just factory with extra steps. You can already go in and play private matches with your buddies with whatever gear you all want and set your own rules. Like, all right, nobody bring a mutant, no tier six armor like you can already do that but what i would like is

the wager match thing i just remember like sitting on the couch next to white boy and watch him just crush wager matches and just like get all those points and be like man you're destroying them like like like i want that concept but with tar that was i don't even remember what he was winning but in those wager matches like like what that currency was used for but like tarkov currency i do understand it's hard to come by like like that game already has that currency to like bet and gamble with and in it so it'd be so fun i'd like that a lot and what if you could set the amount you could agree upon like um custom amounts like two guys could agree to do like 10 million ruble 1v1 or something. That'd be neat.

Yeah, I just think that would get around a lot of the stuff that they're trying to stop. Ah, that would ruin it. Yeah, it would be an issue. A rich friend could bet a lot and throw the game. I don't know how to get around that, but I do love the idea of wager matches. It's a shame to just ruin that. Well, anyway.

I'm all in on Darktide. That's the next game. I probably will barely game. You know what I've been doing lately? Darktide? All right. Yeah. So Darktide is a four-player co-op game.

Think Left 4 Dead-ish or Vermintide. Oh, is it Warhammer? Yeah. Oh, I did see that. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm super excited about that. Lately, and I haven't been gaming a ton,

but Colin is into Fall Guys. You remember Fall Guys? Fall Guys is good, and it's getting better. It's actually a lot of fun. So Fall Guys, like Colin never stopped playing. He just kept honing his skills to the point where my son is a Fall Guys fucking savant. He's like a bully.

He wins all the time. there's 60 people in a game he wins like every third one and uh he just go best skill-based matchmaking and fall guys by the way there's is there yeah yeah so he's not enough he's crushing everyone he's just fucking smashing people and he always takes a picture of himself like the monitor his ipod ipod so it was like a fucking cooking like baking sheet it's just filled with photos of him smashing one guy after a nut just like all these wins and he sends them to like me his friend his mom and uh uh it's hilarious so i started trolling him like i'm the one who's actually good like if you ever need advice you know just come to me it's cool i've got this and i can barely get out of the first

round like i'm not very good but i constantly offered to give him advice and it's he's like no fall guys is so hard for you i'm like not for me nah just because it's hard for you just make it hard for me exactly i'm like i'm the best ball guys player in the house don't get confused yeah he's like what no you can't win i'm magnanimous in my losses i'm letting you win it's a it's a hard i have one win ever and i bet i played a hundred rounds probably around 100 um and i got one win it's it's i gotta say so they either announced that it's coming soon or whatever but they announced that they're opening up like custom level steam workshop whatever basically you you know you want to make your own not steam workshop

it's epic right no it is steam i can't remember it does matter they basically that you know you can make your own levels first of all it's got to be the greatest idea because how hard can it be just put a bunch of fucking hammers. It's like Halo Forge, right? Have as much fun as you want. That's cool. And then private lobbies, so you can play with your friends.

I think that Fall Guys is a fun game, even if you're just playing four people, because, like, it's just you and your friends, and, you know, you don't have to worry about just, like, backing out afterwards. Somebody always wins. So, like, the game idea was great. It's just, it's definitely a lot harder now the the people that have continued to play non-stop

i played for like five six hours i won once and it was like a grueling victory and i think i he gave it to me he's like look at this idiot i got gold crowns and everything dripped out in gold and i've got like the standard bean suit like first time here no i i'm the bean in the cowboy hat so people know i've played oh yeah yeah a level one outfit you you would not know he's a sleeper yeah exactly he's a sleeper no one he's so good like then you can see him like working waiting, grabbing rings at the right time. He doesn't sit there. If you need to finish a game with a tail or something, he's not getting a tail all game long. He's just chilling.

And then with 15 seconds left, he takes your tail and wins. See? Then I wouldn't have liked to play with him because I was always the idiot running around with a tail and then it's like, five, four, three, and then someone who's actually good is like i'll relieve you of this idiot yeah when i was playing there's somebody literally just

afk'd for the first 90 seconds or like 80 seconds that game and then 10 seconds comes back he's like all right i'm time time to win like he was like what's the point of running around you know i just stressful for me oh i i made such an ass of myself like just missing dives through easy hoops like on stream just looking like an idiot it it was a hard game to play on stream for me because i i'm not good at games and also it has such an aura of a game that is very easy that when you suck at it it's like oh guys trust me like this guy doesn't have a lot of purchase on the ground he's slipping he's sliding like i know it looks like i just scared him into the abyss but no and there's player collision and it's very crowded so what you

intend to do is not what you get to do oftentimes because people are pushing you around but uh i don't know colin just figured out how to be the pusher, not the pushy. He grabs people and throws them to the side. He knows exactly what's up. Everything's easy to him. It's pretty funny. Is that game Among Us, which was so big a couple years ago, is that still popular? No.

I don't think so. That was one of those games that kind of blew up because of the pandemic. It was like people people even my normal friends were just like hey it's a good thing for us to just go and like backstab each other and it's on mobile and yeah then it spawned a shit ton of other ones I don't think many people play right now I have a non

gaming topic for Jericho so you are in addition to being a streamer in the music business but the music you deal with is like electronic music mostly yeah it's dance music yeah can you tell the songs apart because they all kind of go like a wicka wicka beep beep it's kind of it's like the most boomer thing like can you tell it about songs for you would you be like oh sure i know that one yeah and

pretty much any song i've listened to in a while like no way no way there's no way you're gonna blow your mind when i hear like a kick and snare from like a techno song and you're gonna be like there's no way it's not the same song but like yeah of course first of all none of our songs sound even remotely similar they're all very unique right this is not this this is not like looking at hamburgers and saying can you close your eyes and tell them apart this is like looking at to me like vastly different meals and being like well can you tell like yes i can tell you who the guy is that made it because i can hear it you know so it's like uh it's it's like looking at different paintings and being like

you know it's if van gogh paints a clock did he do the drippy clock? Like his clock's different from like, I'm not sure. A Warhol or, or, you know, or Salvador Dali. So you're thinking. yeah,

Dali. So it's like, you know, I, of course I can, but that's just, uh, it sounds a little racist,

you know, like, can you tell them apart? They're all the same. They're all the same. I guess I can tell them apart. That's a, that's a great way to respond to someone having difficulty differentiating anything being like wow little racist wow you can't taste the black truffle oil on this burger

racist yeah we glossed over your your your ridiculous impulse purchase you got a thirty thousand dollar motorcycle what'd you get? Oh, yeah. Did you get like Evil Knievel's bike or something? No, it's kind of a dad bike. So what happened was I went on this long trip, the one where I broke my leg. I did a thousand miles in a day, but it really wasn't the appropriate bike for that. I did that on a glorified dirt bike

and I'm like, I should get a touring bike if I think this is fun. So I got a honda goldwing oh yeah it's it is i looked at all of them and narrowed it down to two i looked at all the harleys the indians the hondas etc the victories and uh it just seems like the honda goldwing is the polished sort of look at that it's got a big fat sport bike look up here zach it is a 2022 blue honda goldwing i am looking at a 2022 honda goldwing the looking at your dash it's got apple carplay it does have apple carplay it looks like that looks like a good cool cockpit right there

it looks very sporty uh you're gonna be like judge dredd yeah that's what i got that's what i bought but from the side it is not sporty from but from the if you look at the are you kidding look at that looks cool to me how many is it a 1800 cc it is a six-cylinder bike my next biggest bike hell yeah it's a v6 yeah that's that's that probably moves it does it goes fast and you put a passenger on I took Jackie out to a steakhouse the other day this is a little on the nose but basically the mission is to

go to cities a few hours away and have sexcations with Jackie that is what we bought this bike for and we're trying to do the first one on Wednesday I'll let you know how it goes on the show thanks for telling us about your sexual plan plan you know i'm gonna go on sex this weekend but revolutionary they're revolutionizing the sex life over there in north carolina

oh yeah we are so that's it was like by the biker sex now exactly we'll go to the beach we'll go to fuck i think winston-salem's our first date and um yeah you know just go on little vacations you know overnighters or something somewhere else and make an adventure out of it i like it so i like it i like your motorcycle too it looks real cool yeah i like this one i think this is my favorite of the ones you have to i would be intimidated by it and like what i like to call cqb scenarios yeah it's 800 pounds like i i when i took jackie to the steakhouse when we came back we're in this residential neighborhood and there's um some of the roads are like unfinished so they're just they're not big cul-de-sac shaped like thermometers

instead they're just roads that end and i practice u-turns with a passenger on it i was kind of like proud of myself for nailing them yeah like my bike's light enough that I can make stupid decisions and do things poorly and just make up with it for it with a little like putting my foot down and being stronger than the bike weighs because it's not that heavy. You tilt it a little. You're pushing 80 pounds or something, but I don't know what it feels like to push 800 fucking pounds. That's what I always. It's like you throw a a passenger with a helmet and some moto gear and stuff you're threatening a thousand pounds like that's what it weighs you are rolling around a thousand what size engine does it have by the way 1 800 cc oh

baby that's so cool 1838 i think is number. I bet there are cars that have smaller engines. Sure. Yes, what do you mean? Yeah, 1.8 liter car. Some are smaller. Yeah, like four cylinders. How much bigger is that than your next largest engine? Double.

My other one's an 890. Yeah, so a double. Yeah, that's cool, cool but no incremental increases for you it's a fun bike and like i said i bought it in iowa and i immediately drove it home i don't know 1400 miles ish something this is as the one of us who knows the least about bikes this is far and away the aesthetically the coolest i like well i'm glad you like it um it's fun i i particularly there was a black one like 60 miles from my house and i'm like nay nay i will fly to iowa instead and make a uh make a ride out of it now is that preference or do you just like uh really wanted a blue one it was

straight up actually jackie liked the blue one so i name all my bikes. I have a dual sport named Kinky because it likes to get dirty. I have Buffy, which is a really aggressive, lethal, light and strong dirt bike. This bike's name is Sapphire. One, it's blue. Two, it's a stripper name and it's built for three ways. Sapphire.

That's the bike's name. There you go. You're having a lot of fun. that's the bike's name there you go you're having a lot of fun i don't know what that is it's the same bike but like something honda did okay um that looks very retro that looks cool yeah and i do see it's the same engine i don't recognize every piece of it though like the seat's different i guess wheels they're solid well mostly solid are they i got a full screen oh yeah you're right yeah that looks neat um no i like your bike that's cool well that's uh the whole thing is cool i never stray outside of

like black and red for colors for things though like even the fucking chair is black and red you know even your gym stuff you were going all my gym stuff is black and red. You know what I mean? Even your gym stuff. You were going. All my gym stuff is black and red. I just think those are like strong colors you can't go wrong with. Those are also the Targaryen colors. Black and red are great. I can totally see why you do that. But no, I like I wanted blue. I want to know.

I wish that I could be like you would stray outside of those. Too easy. You don't think I want a yellow car? Yeah, that too. Yeah, my sports teams are often black and red. Braves are blue and red, but it doesn't matter. No, I would like to get a blue something,

but every time I go to buy something that costs more than, I don't know, $100, I'm like, let's get a good color. No, Kyle, you don't want to be like me. Every time you find some cool hats or sneakers sneakers you realize you're in the ladies section you do you do accidentally cross dress a lot i think these things happen like i love when michael scott did that and they looked at the tag of his suit and it was Miss Sterius.

It was a lady's fucking suit. The pants didn't have pockets. He's like, yeah, it's a man. They didn't have back pockets. It's just his smooth ass. It's not a good look for men. Or maybe it is a good look, but it's not the look that we want. It's way too tight on his shoulders

and his arms and it makes him have birthing hips like with the shoulder pads like the whole thing it was bad bad look there's there's nothing like worse than putting on an ill-fitting suit suits like they can either really tone you up make you look good or they can you know they can they can donald trump you and make you look like you're not as fat as you are or they can Chris Christie you and fatten you up. Dude, Chris Christie doesn't exactly look slim in a baseball uniform. But if you would have

thrown him in some bigger pants. Come on. Like bell bottoms or something? Anything bigger than what they make. What were those jeans that the school shooters always wore with the enormous bell bottoms oh like in the night like ginkgo jeans ginkgo jeans yeah big giant ginkgo yeah ginkgo i hear ginkgo if i saw those come back when i was they are coming back i saw somebody wearing them and i saw somebody wearing ginkgo jeans i knew their dad beat them. Usually if I saw a jean coat jeans,

they, it was a kid who wore those and also wore skater shoes and they'd have, they'd have a number of chains hanging off the pants, but we were always chains. Yeah. Always chains. Um, in a lot of invaders,

Zim tops and, and, uh, bracelets. So, all right. Well, that's a different kind of man right there. So, oh my god.

No, no, no, no. That guy's way too calm and chill. This is not the kind of guy that would wear a JNCO jean traditionally. Look at that power stance, though. You talked about Trump in a suit. Have you seen his butt in the Hannity interview? Is it huge?

I haven't. I've seen his butt on the golf course. And that was huge because... First of all, it's my prerogative to hardscope Trump's ass. I'll do what I want to. I don't know if it's juicy. Well done. What is happening? He's caked

up. He's overflowing. Dude, he is absolutely caked up. That's my president. Well done on showing this picture, by the way, Zach. It wasn't very good. It looks like the way he's sitting, because he likes to do that lean forward thing, it looks like his shoulders are narrower than his hips. It looks like his entire upper body is this. He looks Kim Kardashian-like.

This is such a confusing picture. Can you pull up a photo of Squidward eating when he eats too many Krabby Patties? That's literally what I feel. He's in the vault shoving down Krabby Patties. No, Squidward, it'll go to your thighs!

My thighs. And then he explodes. I mean, look at that. It looks like Trump's torso is on top of a larger man's lower section. It's insane. He makes, he, it really makes, yeah, he does look like that. It makes Hannity's ass look pretty small and dare I say beta. It's easier to surround yourself with

fat people than it is to lose weight. Especially in America. It's true. There was this guy on the whitewater rafting trip we went on. He was probably 6'6", 6' foot seven and every bit of 500 pounds

like pear what sport it was a whitewater rafting trip he was he was in another boat thank god i remember we were like in the waiting area it was him and his group it was a whitewater raft but he treated it like a kayak he was playing anchor and like literally like i i saw him and i was like please do not have that guy be in our raft like he's so big like it's like it turns out if you were any large wrangler yeah like if you were any larger i imagine they would have been like you can't go on this. But thankfully he wasn't in ours. And like the instructor who was in our little boat was like tying the things on to us. And like he was like, yeah, some people like real, real big people. You can't get the life jacket on them, right?

Because they're pear shaped. And so you tighten it on the lower pear part and then they get in the water and it shoots up because it doesn't get there. And I'm like and he's like clearly like frustrated at someone in another boat no one in our boat is is that body type like we all can wear you know we're very fit we can wear you're all shaped enough like a human being that the human being size stuff fits you yes and so we're all good mutant in the other boat though right there's a this guy this guy is enormous in the other boat and we are in i guess our like teacher because there's a guide in every raft like he our guide was like the grand poobah the main in charge guy

and so as they're all going he's like we're on the cleanup crew so in case anybody gets stuck on a rock or a rapid or something we can go over there and I can help them out and we'll guide them out of that. And this big fat guy fell out of the boat, maybe 100 yards into this. Like we, we were still in the back. We had not gone yet.

Our guy was like, all right, you know, Stevie, Joe, you're up next. Go ahead. And then he would go.

And then the guy like right in front of us went, and he's even commentating for us. He's like, we're going to hold back a little bit. It looks like they're struggling, getting congested up there a little. Oh, and he was talking to his guides. He's like, oh, Big Jim, oh, Big Jim, get him over that rock. Get him over. Don't you stick up on that.

Oh, Jesus. And he's like, oh, they're not going over that one oh no and then the guy fell out and he falling out almost feels like not dramatic enough like he barreled into the water from the boat it's like when you watch like a skyscraper or something huge fall in slow motion you're like oh there you go like when they drop a rock from the top of the dam and you see a giant splash exactly they he falls out and immediately every they had just gone over the safety thing of like all right if somebody falls out in the rapids you turn them towards the boat and then you like grab onto their thing and you like just lean back into the boat and pull them yeah and this boat in front

of us has this big fat guy like back to the boat in the water and they're like trying to pull him up but he's too fat and his back is arching and they can't get him back out of the water he's wet now so like two other and they're like we're like trying to catch up at this point but like two other boats like almost like the uh the the national guard or the coast guard come around him and they like all help get this guy back in but like the rest of the trip we had to remain like three four hundred yards back behind this specific boat because this guy at any point could cause was he alone was he alone he had like friends it was him and three other people and the guide in there that sucks because if he's by himself then we can yell but i don't want to start a whole like fight with a group of people i could you know i i could mock

the fat man and then keep my distance but i don't want to get beat up i mean if we if we wanted to lose him we could have lost him we could have blown right by him but i just like i feel like they're ruining your trip is like my thought process it's like it's like if we have to slow down and wait for him it was one of those things where like you like when i saw him fall out like i felt real i got that feeling of like oh no like come on guy like please like i was like embarrassed for him because you know he's like at the amusement park when they yeah and he's like like this is what i was fearing now i'm too heavy to get back in the boat and i wasn't annoyed at all it was it's funny looking back but my real thought was like just a lot of empathy like oh this poor big fat guy like this was probably his fear today and now he's going through it

he brought that on himself oh i was gonna ask if you'd ever seen anybody like who was too fat to go on a roller coaster or something and get removed. Yes. I mean, not get removed, but I mean, we've we've I think on several occasions, like there's been people that have had like have made the situation around them uncomfortable because of their sheer size. And like usually it comes, for example, I live in a in downtown L.A. and the one of two grocery stores there's a whole foods very nice you know very clean there is a ralph's not nice nor clean very much the only other grocery store and so the creatures that you see egg enter and exit that are like it's like oblivion characters on randomized you're like all right i didn't know they made them like that but the way that they have it to

like discourage being able to get out of there without your cart is that they have like a gate it's like a turnstile gate and i've seen on several occasions people that are like i i think they should get the benefit of the doubt because it can definitely fit a 300 pound person if they're proportioned like 580 you know they're just wide but anything more than that and we're taught and like especially people who have like a bag many get stuck and because they get stuck they can't push the turnstile down so then it bounces back and they're in that awkward position where they just feel like so they yell they're like ah it's like it's like a creature being caught in a gate and you're like you know

this i gotta come over and like shake it and stuff you're just like damn all right um but yeah i'm trying to think damn i should go to whole foods like what am i gonna do and it's the only way in and out there with a can of grease uh yeah i i mean they're more grease man there's uh there's there's there's people that use the um i flew into new york la guardia airport over the weekend for my cousin's uh wedding and they have complimentary carts like for the elderly and fat people who don't want to walk the very large airport and so they do have these on super uncomfortable looking plastic they almost look designed like like the benches outside of like uh libraries to like be uncomfortable for homeless not to sleep there yeah so but yeah and but so i saw benches yeah But I saw so many just, you know, like very, very morbidly overweight people overflowing on this very plastic see through plastic thing.

And it's just like at what point is there are you making a conscious decision? Like, I know it looks awful. Like, I know it is just completely, you know, not made for me. This is for people who have like, like yeah who like physically can't get anywhere and it's just like no they get out they'll like get out and walk too when they realize they can't fit in it it's like okay what the fuck yeah yeah i don't know i i've told the story before but i saw a lady who would not fit in i think superman the ride at six flags over georgia i think it was superman. It was like a stand-up coaster. You know, you sit on the bike seat thing at the top thing.

The clamshell clamps down. It wouldn't clamp down on her. And they were just like, I'm sorry, ma'am. It's not going to happen. And she had to like, she was in the front, like the very front car. And I was one behind her. And they got her ass out and she left. And she was in the front.

It's a longer line to get to the front, too. Yeah. You have to wait a little bit extra longer. I don't know if she had the fast pass i always get that thing um i don't know it i can't imagine going to an amusement park without a fast pass like i can't imagine going to an amusement park anymore if you haven't done in-depth research on how to get there and min max or stay like it makes me anxious when people like we're just going to king's dominion and figuring it out and i'm like like no i don't think we should it's a sat to King's Dominion and figuring it out. And I'm like, no, I don't think we should.

It's a Saturday. It's Labor Day. And I think we should choose any other day. But it's true. No, I don't think we should. I'm going to think we should have an agenda in place. Otherwise, you're going to walk in and it'll be like, what do we do first? I don't know.

Let's have a 22 minute bicker fest about it. I want to go and check out the line at the coaster at the back all right and then we can walk back here to the front and then ride our ride it's like shut the fuck up yeah we'll get there we need to go to rides i do this three or four times yeah and then move to the next one yeah i usually try to go uh on a day when i don't think there's going to be a lot of traffic, like a Tuesday early as they open on a rainy day. Like it's fine rain. Yeah.

Like if it's drizzling, as long as it's not pouring or anything, the coasters go faster. I can't argue with it. Yeah. They have a stand up coaster and I go unconscious at the bottom of the second loop de loop every time. It's really fun. It's like the one that they have called the Goliath at the Six Flags here.

I'm going to take you paramotoring now that I know that. Oh, yeah. You're going to knock me out and kill me. I'm going to get high-fiving. I'm hoping you go unconscious at the bottom of our acro moves. Is the Goliath like the top thrill dragster in Cedar Point where it just fires you out and you go straight up and right back down?

No, I can't remember if that's the case or not. dragster in cedar point where it just fires you out and you go straight up and right back yeah uh no i can't remember if that's the case or not um but i but it it's the tallest one it's like this orange thing and they kind of built it so it goes under underground right there's a bridge etc but the reason that i like it so much because you know like it's if you do get your head down you'll kind of black out at the bottom of the uh of the thing is because when you get to the top you can see with 100 certainty if there's ever a wildfire because it's just you're sitting in in like the north area of la county like the sun setting it's beautiful and then there's just like eight or nine fires that you can see out in the distance puffing and you're like oh baby it's a great roller coaster that's fun you should feel a little yeah yeah while you're like, oh, baby, it's a great roller coaster. That's fun. It makes you feel a little high.

Yeah. While you're up there. I love roller coasters. That's coming closer. Roller coasters are a nice blend of safety and fun. Like, it's not fun enough. It's not Woody is bored by roller coasters, I imagine. Look at that. That's a pretty scary little drop, and then you go underground.

Yeah, that looks like a ton of fun. I like roller coasters a lot. I think they're fun. I don't know that the like fun to wait ratio is good enough now i know how fast passes but i'm my experience is like disney world and stuff where it still sucks disney is literally the worst and i can and i have and i live here and so i've had the pass and stuff it's just simply i know people talk about it live here disneyland sorry i don't you know same thing in my head but like you you know when you make it such a pilgrimage spot and people for better or for worse now are it's easier to get there and

whatever like it's not necessarily like the bucket list trip people like you want to go uh again and i it's just they put too many people in the park so you're right the weight to doing anything ratio unless it's a specific day or you have like exclusive access is awful you're getting in like five rides for the day and i think that like what's the point that sucks i think if you stay in the disney world hotels you get fast passes all day i'm pretty sure that's right but that's more money more money to the god. Yeah, yeah. And Kyle's like, why wouldn't you get the FastPasses? The thing is, it's expensive, right? We're paying like

a thousand bucks a night for these hotels. It's not like you're paying an extra hundred for a good time. See, Six Flags is roller coasters anyway. Like, fuck all that. Actually, they do have a bunch of kiddie shit. They've got the Right, but it's more fun. Like, theme parks are

cool but but roll or sorry whichever the the amusement parks whichever the ones with the roller coasters mostly are the ones that i want to go to say i don't want to sit and you know on a vlog flume ride that has like a chucky that's where we get hot they have one of those here but that's where you get stoned in the tunnel of spooky ghosts and whatever. You gotta go to Cedar Point, Ohio for the amusement park. They have the entire... There's not even like...

There's a tiny little area where it's like, ye olde corn dog shop, and that is all the fucks they give about flavor. It's all about the roller coasters, which is what you want. You can go to six flags uh here in atlanta and just you can ride every ride two or three times and just a few hours like like it's when you've got the fast pass and the vip bracelet shit you not only skip to the

front of the line um and you've only got to wait on other people who have the same shit so there'll be like five of them like the coaster will run five times in five minutes so your your line waiting is literally five minutes you've still got to walk all the way there but it's actually a short they give you a shortcut like it's like all right everybody else you head out that way and then come back you sir right this way yeah that's the roller coaster right there get in it's and then once you ride it once you come back and you're like want to go again you're like abso- just close the clamshell down and you watch the person who actually just waited like 37 minutes or some shit go oh because they thought they were next but no i wasted money and now i have to go a second time it's it's the most power you can have over another human being for $45. The power to ruin their day.

I remember there was a story in the early 2000s. I must have been like 10. And it was like, I remember me and my friends talking about it. They had built this new roller coaster called The Boss or some big wooden roller coaster that we were advertising about at Six Flags St. Louis. And there was this big story of like, oh, this one guy is writing it all day every day to break the record of the most

times writing a wooden coat, like something like that. And I remember like all of us, like nine, 10, 11 years old, just being like, Oh, that's gotta be like the coolest guy ever. And like, then like as an adult thinking about it and being like man like that's that's a loud alarm bell that someone is suffering like someone someone in that gentleman's life needs to ask how he's doing and be a helping friend because that person is miserable like if you had to write it for like eight hours that would honestly be a fun record to go for.

But if it's like two days or something, if I've got to take a shit. In weeks, what? He just kept writing it for like a whole summer. Come on. He was shitting on that thing and like sleeping on it. I don't know. Oh, come on.

If it was weeks. I didn't really read the news at the time. A lot of it was like rehashed information I was getting from other 10 year olds do you think that he has do you think that he has um like brain like severe like not brain damage but like there's got to be some sort of side effects to riding a rickety thing where you're just constantly in vibration especially wouldn't because you're just like i bet you're just... You think he's getting brain addled from riding the coaster too much? It's a wooden coaster. Even the smoothest

wooden coasters are... This is some 15th century kooky shit. Oh, there is a fallout. Kyle, in my defense, I don't know what addling means. I think he's responsible for this opinion. I think I just don't know if addling means. So I think he's responsible for this opinion. I think he's written a lot.

Women couldn't fly because some of their anatomy wouldn't work. What rattles your brain? What does it take to cause a little damage? Well, okay, sure, but... Impacts. Lots of little impacts. If I vibrated your head with a massage gun, that's not awful.

It doesn't fuck you up, but eventually it's bad for you, right? No, it's good for you. You're very relaxed. No, you'd be... How am I going to vibrate your brain? This is a new case study. I've got a Theragun and I'm just going to take it to the back of my head for a bit. Yeah, put a Theragun on

your head for eight hours and see if you remember where your keys are. Well, maybe not a Theragun. I was thinking of one of those old-time vibrators, but a Theragun on your head for eight hours and see if you remember where your keys are. Well, maybe not Theragun. I was thinking of one of those old-time vibrators, but Theragun is like... Oh, like a magic wand? Yeah, like a magic wand. Well, there's no head protection on a lot of the wooden ones, so you're just kind of... I always bring my helmet. Shaken.

You always bring a helmet? You want to talk about a way to get to Button Line at a theme park? Bring a helmet. Bring a branded helmet. want to talk about a way to get to button line to the theme park bring a helmet bring a well-worn helmet with like like like disney stickers that are partially rubbed off like and just for your measure put a little spinny thing on the top there is a way to make disney world fun and it's not fast pass and it's not staying at the thing wheelchair it's bringing a disabled child yes no okay it's okay yeah you know we have worked

that benefit and and yeah you will enter every ride through the exit line and they just put you right on it's i've gone with kitty before and uh and gotten the wheelchair uh uh ride that's okay that's pretty sweet a lot of ramps involved though make you take the long way and i'll talk to that i mean i don't do it i mean she you make her push yourself obviously yeah i mean kyle's obviously dragging his fake club foot behind him so he can't be bothered to do that that's how you tired if he had to push her we can't have that no no no i i i like the i like six i haven't been to a lot of other ones we went to disney fucking land or some shit when we were in la one time me and white boy

and i remember like and x jaws and kitty and I remember on the way back, we drove past whatever the cool coaster park is out there. You could see all the coasters, like a spring stretched out and thrown in a pile. And I was like, oh my fucking God, this exists? We rode T-Cops, God damn it. T-Cops! We spent all day on bullshit rides, thinking we had gone to the good part. Point in Tucker's column. You needed to go with the plan. You got to look up look up what are the rides what's my priority list of rides because

a lot of the time you can go a moment oh epcot i don't give a fuck about a guy selling bad quality italian food i want to go to the no you go to epcot to get hammered but you're right you're not going in there to like experience anything else it's just i i think i think yeah i think you could have done better with the plan but also like even going to any of those parks like there's not a good theme park in california it's too busy here it's just you need to go to cedar point or like the off-brand place where there's nothing else but the theme park like that's why people go there you know and that's the other thing and what he was talking about the stay it when you're at disney um world when if you if you're lucky enough to come to beautiful six flags over georgia there's a motel right next door 47 a night you're good you're good you're gonna love the i don't want some shitty room the the door better lead directly

to my room from the outside absolutely we don't absolutely. We don't waste your time in some big lobby in some fancy hotels. We don't got no fancy stairs, neither. The slide works. Dude, this hotel, it sounds like there have just been a series of parades outside my room since I sat down. I can't imagine how loud I am to other people because I can hear normal level talking. The last time I did an acro weekend, there were Mexicans singing

outside my door. They weren't half bad. What did you do about it? Nothing. There were four of them. They were just all talented. They were talented singers. They had the radio going and they were singing along as but they were just all talented. They were talented singers. They had the radio going and they were singing along

as if they were trained at this by the pool while drinking. And I'm like, darn. Do you work here? Is this the entertainment? Because it's English, please. I know Tucker. Sing in English!

I didn't say anything! Being upset about Mariachi fans singing in Spanish. I think the... We're gonna be here fucking singing in English! You better learn to speak American. Yeah.

Kyle, we haven't talked about Iran yet, and it was on your list of topics you wanted to cover. Oh, man. So I guess the morality police beat a young lady to death over not wearing her headscarf, hijab, or whatever it is. So she wore it. She didn't wear it correctly.

Yeah, there was some hair showing. The morality police took her into custody where she later died. What, do you see somebody with their helmet not buckled up right? Are they wearing a helmet or aren't they? Like, that ain't going to work. Okay? I'll tell you this. You're in NASCAR.

You got that bitch unbuckled. They're going to disqualify you. Kyle, you make a strong point. So there she was, hijab unbuckled. So the NASCAR morality police would take you in and kill you. Okay, so, you know, they come by. They check out, you know, her... I would start to watch NASCAR.

I'm going to be honest with you. I think if NASCAR was one 10 is oppressive. Taking him out to kill him. Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s hijab has slipped across the most recent turn. I'm seeing a lot of hair. Okay, yeah, yeah. So that thing is over the top center of her head. If your screen is small and maybe you're in a phone so it's hard to tell there's a morality police yeah they have like

religious police there yeah i think saudi arabia also has morality police yeah so they beat her to death and now i think women uh nationwide there in iran are protesting um burning their jobs in the street and i've seen a couple of clips of iranian they're not wearing proper uniforms but they're often referred to as like police or something and they've got milk they've got gear like tasers and stuff but i saw like a cop with like with like a club and a stun gun and he's like stay back and he's like he's like using the thing and it's flashing blue and they just beat the shit out of him 30 strong. That's what I'm saying. It's not like in the movies where one guy gets to keep taking two at a time. You got to see what happens in real life when 30 people want to whoop your ass.

I saw them try to grab a woman who wasn't wearing her hijab. Like, morality police. Like, ah, you too, huh? They grab her ass and start dragging her away. Again, 30 people attacked that man and i don't know if they killed him or not but he's not awake anymore i i saw a similar thing so this guy's on a motorcycle and he spots a woman either not wearing a hijab or hijab i'm not sure she's either not wearing it correctly or she's not wearing one at all because it's in the midst of this protest.

And he hops off his motorcycle and he hits her. Just whacks her up on the side of the head, kind of like a palm strike. And there are like 22 men nearby who aren't having it. The guy thinks he's going to go back on his motorcycle just having taught her a lesson. Nay, nay, nay. They pull him off his motorcycle, they put him down on the ground, and they start group kicking him, and they beat

the fuck out of this guy. I don't know what happens to him. They don't show them saying, all right, he's had enough. That's not part of the video. They just cut it. It never is over there. It's like, all right, he's unconscious.

Now what do we want to do that's the thing awful probably I wonder if this guy's going to laugh at his asshole it's like are there mass protests going on now it would seem and it seems like guys and girls

have had enough of this a job thing. You know what? I think. The pistol shooting into the crowd. He was going bang, bang, bang, bang. Like shooting people with a handgun. Jesus Christ. Wild, crazy stuff.

They're having some real protest. What the hell? Yeah. Yeah. Iran's going bonkers. I wonder if there won't be a revolution over this right it would i assume it would be like i assume it would be uh something involving like a wow i assume it would be something like the younger more secular uh or secular like uh locations yeah urban yeah the

ones that are more like i guess i'll call it modern like forward thinking for that area are going to be the ones that are actively calling for change but if the moral police and everybody else involved is 68 and ancient like what's gonna matter have directionality what jesus what a bigot forward thinking oh i have no idea yeah you know i just whatever i mean i would be interested in like what what is the actual what's the breakdown over there of people who are like yes i love religious police versus people who are like this is archaic we don't want this is it i don't it's hard to think

that so the way that women have worn hijabs in iran i understand is getting more and more i'm gonna call it slutty. Cause it's funny. It used to be, you couldn't see hair at all. And then you could see a little bit in front and now they're wearing it. Like almost like my headset is right. We're like, you have full head is showing. She's got her full brow beaming boys.

And the, the hijab is just sort of working its way back to where women actually have a hairstyle while wearing it. And I guess the morality police put their foot down over this they don't like the way this is trending and the population is like you're fucking insane well they did beat that woman to death um presumably maybe maybe she had asthma and that's why she died in custody oh yeah that was your take on that other thing the i'm often wrong about these things that gentleman that the cops murdered i don't remember which one that was but i believe you

yeah i don't know which one it was either no it's hard to keep up with them police activity remains to be my favorite youtube channel in existence where they just show you show you that that raw if they do edit it they only do so for entertainment purposes they just make it a better story and it's just it's just cops shooting it out all day every day and so many people like god if they tell you to get out get out don't drive towards them they'll shoot you 12 times lately you see so many people get shot on there unless it's a woman i've noticed that if it's a woman and she drives toward the cops they'll usually let her go and like crash

into eight more cars but if it's ever a dude they light him up like for car chases specifically like there's this scenario that happens a lot where the person's in a car and they won't get out and the cops have their guns out and the person wants to drive away and the cops are standing in front. And if you drive towards them, you are now like, like a murder. Yeah. You've already started.

We've already began the attempted murder charges or the assault with a deadly weapon charges. And like, they oftentimes will just start shooting the driver over and over in those scenarios. But I've seen that it definitely matters. Like who the person is. I saw a lady in Georgia. She must have rammed like 12 cars she's got a kid in the back seat like a toddler or something and they find they have to sandwich her yeah they can't just light

them up yeah because you couldn't see the kid well i have to make sure you hit it anyway you gotta wait till we get the door open yeah i don't want to wing that little fuck we thought it was a small dog oh go ahead no they had to like sandwich her with like a car in front and a car in back and like when they got her out and she was like what what i do she had rammed 12 cars they'd been beating on the windows begging her to stop i didn't do nothing i didn't do nothing like what are you taking that one she had a baby in the car too yeah that do you i try to look up what happened to her like i i found her name and i searched like sentencing and stuff maybe it hasn't happened yet because it only happened in like june or july just as slow but it was an outrageous example of a woman just running over she ran one guy three

times three times tried to stop her car by hand the fuck what was he thinking he was like pushing on the hood trying to stop her car wouldn't the car like always win it's like that man versus car bit from uh rick and morty um yeah i don't know that that's the best channel on youtube that shit is awesome there's this huge library that you can go through uh and like sometimes it's cops being like actual heroes saving babies that are dying like cpr not often but sometimes like just as many i'd say i'd say it's i'd say it's more good cops than bad cops. No selection bias on the YouTube. I don't I don't think so, because like this channel just shows you like cop interaction. Is there any like is there any like really good like I want a top 10 like, you know, you know, version of that where it's like top 10 like hostage situations.

Number 10, you know just got what i would do then is go to the police activity channel and then go by like views like most views yeah most viewed because like one of the most viewed is like a hero rescue um there's a bunch of there's one where like you know the cop ties a kid's tie who's speeding who's going to like something important um but then there's like fucking shootouts where they like knock on the door. Come out of here, James, get out here. And James opens up with an M16 from inside like it's modern warfare

and kills a cop immediately. Larry's dead and he's laying there. And then the other cops are like, what the fuck? And they're all shooting just randomly like an action movie into the building. And you can hear the guy in there. Come on. And it's like,

what have we stumbled into here? Like there's tons of them like that with machine gun wielding bad men. And it's like, how did I not hear about the massacre at on sixth street that I'm watching right now? How am I only now learning that this happened? It's like some action movie shit, like one out of 10 times. I saw a crazy crackhead go after a female cop with a knife. Like the cop knocks on the door, ma'am, could you come outside? She comes outside with the knife

already back and stabbing at her. And she shoots that lady and the lady's guts are out on the ground while she's crawling, still trying to stab while a canine unit is dragging her across the ground. And the cop goes, careful there. Don't step in the intestines. It's so hardcore. And it's this cute female cop. And when she gets stabbed a little, it's not bad. It's in the arm.

But she screeches over that radio. Ah! Code! Whatever code is for like, cute girl just got stabbed. Need some white knights. It's like a code 77 and every cop within 50 miles came like they were there so fast it was i'd never seen that kind of response time the president could be down and they wouldn't have gotten there that fast they were hatching her up and killing that other lady like as fast as they could it's great i bet you've seen this footage have you seen it was on reddit today a ukrainian drone hovers right over two russians in a foxhole these two

russian men are like practically sleeping nearly cuddling in this foxhole and uh you watch these drones they drop with such precision as i watch the bomb fall i'm like oh it looks like it's a little off it's a little off no they're never off they can hit hatches and tanks they can hit like i swear if i held my palm out they'd hit it they're so good at it they should just start hitting them in the head with like rocks like like like add some humiliation to it like a russian colonel taken out by an by a lucky eight magic eight ball today a ukrainian kid plays cod yeah we thought about war and we never imagined they'd be using the kill streaks on us

they dropped this bomb in there and immediately something flies out that i thought was a body but no one else seemed to think it was so i don't know and then the two of them seem okay like they're pulling the blanket off one of the guys is kind of hugging the other which i take as a sign of distress but i don't know and the other guy is like just sort of working his legs like figuring it out and he seems okay it's a two minute video two and a half minute video at first and as it unfolds he starts moving his leg in a weird way like he has an extra joint above his knee and you're like oh he's hurt and the other guy who's kind of hugging him stops moving i think he's dead it takes him

like a minute to die and then the first guy with the bad leg i think he's dead too and the footage just ends and it's like god damn war is hell especially like modern war seems unfair you know like all war is hell i don't mean to knock it but if we're fighting with spears it's at least like a battle of skills and wits and athleticism inside we're fighting with spears the night before we fight with spears i can find a hole to sleep in and know that you won't dig me out of my hole these guys have no where to hide they are in a foreign country protection where where seemingly like the the locals might fucking kill you but if if the ukrainians see you from the sky they'll just kill you like that like like it's like the other team has kill streaks

that's so scary yeah yeah that's not the war that you ever want to fight when i imagine war we're on the ground and we're looking for the bad guys and well you know what it's you know you know like the even if you you grew up with like the fetishizing the idea of like i could go to war and like i could get around right it very much highlights the at this point in time war is is is even more rng in terms of like like you you are just not going to be safe at any point you could just uh all of a sudden be out on patrol and it's like the thermal drone saw you i'm sorry like there's no you just get notified you were spotted by a thermal drone yeah it is you have to see the footage

because, you know, every once in a... We've all seen so much death and carnage on the internet that we're numb to it. But this one, it got past my numbing agent. And I was like, fuck. Like you said, it's so RNG. These guys didn't do anything stupid

that I could see. Everyone has to sleep. And in a foxhole i mean what were the choices and fuck yeah and it's like you can't you can't there's no way to like train your way out of it it's like oh that you know if that guy was the greatest sniper in global history it wouldn't have mattered a hill of beans it's like yeah but you still got caught by the drone you're done the problem is equipment right like there's plenty of equipment that would get rid of those drones there's electronic warfare that would prevent those drones from being able to operate in that area not if they if they control the area better than the front wouldn't involve guys who are close

enough to rc a drone right well i mean you say you say that but then also you're talking about like the the ability all it takes is like one blind spot to let the tiny drone in versus yeah and like the ability to cover all of that effectively really israel doesn't have problem with that like like like first world like the united states wouldn't either like we've got all sorts of things that that shoot down incoming projectiles and uh electronic but you have to assume that that's assuming that's putting a lot of assumption that you're even worth the amount of tech that's going into protecting you from that like certainly not those guys right you'd have like how high up on the chain of actually fighting

yeah but like how high up on the chain of actually fighting do you actually get drone protection like where kyle brings up a good point we're in ira now. We were recently in Afghanistan and that never happened to us. Our enemies didn't really have that capacity against us. They didn't have that capacity. IEDs, but IEDs. Look, you can learn to detect to the best of your ability, but at a certain point

you're left to the true randomness of I was the one that checked the pile today. Or like I're driving through. Yeah, it's tough. Yeah. I think it's going to keep going for at least another year. It's going to be lots of cool YouTube videos.

I'm seeing lots of guys with GoPros running around. I've seen some crazy battles. I also saw a Ukrainian vaporize like a dozen of his comrades today accidentally by misidentifying another tank. He just blew up a bunch of his buddies. accidentally by identifying another tank. He just blew up a bunch of his buddies. That one's got to feel bad, huh? You vaporize a dozen

of your guys? There's nobody double-checking that kind of stuff? I guess it's war. That was Yoder's job. In Iraq, the first war, which you guys were young for, friendly fire was our biggest cause of death.

It was by far the biggest cause. I watched a thing a couple months ago, and they broke down. They showed all the units. I know you know somebody who was there. I wanted to ask what division he was with because they're like, and then the 187th went like this. They really break it down. Saddam had prepared for that trench style warfare and we went in with those tanks with bulldozers on the front

and buried hundreds of them alive we just drove over them instead of fighting them i didn't know yeah damn it's great it's great yeah yeah the guy i know his unit was wildly successful you know, just a lopsided battle. They show like and then a unit of like 13 Bradley vehicles and seven so-and-sos like broke off

to the left, but they destroyed everything they ran into so it was okay. It was like every time the Americans would make a little mistake, it'd be like, but they just killed everyone and it worked out. But for the sixth time, they didn't have tanks. No, they did.

It was the range. It seemed like we had a 100-mile range and they had a 50-mile range. I'm making these numbers up. We would just see them first and shoot before they could even do anything. Our optics were a lot better. We had the thermal optics already.

It was a real shooting gallery. They killed a lot, a lot of Iraqis. What do they call it, the road of death or something? I think they call it the road that they blamed on the Russians in Call of Duty. They were like, the entire mission is the russians doing the exact like same thing and you're like hmm i just feel like this went differently in my dude it's funny the u.s military is not completely innocent right like we've done our shit you go it's like how dare they attack civilians oh really? Was Hiroshima a military site?

Yeah. I think it was. It's like we're in a bit of a glass house. I think Hiroshima was a military site. Those damn Russians did that. I think there were factories there. They were building stuff in. You know, I'm sure a lot of them made it, though.

I'm sure a lot of them made it. There were probably workers in the weapons factories complicit complicit everyone i bet when you get to that portion of the road when we when you get to that portion of the road we just saw i bet there's a bit of a feeling like all right we get through this part home free there's like 600 cars there there's you know there's a guy driving he was like come on you think they're just going to blow us up? They're not going to shoot us.

They see we're giving up and running away. Oh, no. They did. They killed them all. There's that famous shot of a human skeleton and it looks like something right out of Terminator. There's the flashbacks in Terminator where they show the nuclear future with the skeletons and cars

hanging on the steering wheels. They did that. We did that, I guess. I don't know. If I can say we when UGA is number one, I can say we when we blew up Iraqis too. Yeah, for sure. Those are the rules. Before we jump

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So be sure to check out Lock and Load, check out Better Help Below and check out Wonky Weeds and Death by Gummy Bears. All right. Sorry. I stepped right on Kyle's super interesting topic of UGA football. I know everyone's really excited, so we don't even have to wait for him. What's your favorite part about UGA football? I don't have a favorite part about UGA football. For me, it's hard to narrow down. My team, NC State, unless I'm mistaken, is undefeated. As a matter of fact, no one has ever won more games in that number of attempts so possibly the best team ever that's incredible yeah that's great yeah are you are you ranked is nz state ranked they are actually and by our standards it's a good ranking i'm gonna look

it up but i think they're 12 12 you're right damn good for them that is awfully high not as high as georgia who is like over almost doubled up on the coaches poll of alabama impressive yeah alabama is looking real beatable this year they barely squeezed one out against texas i think um i think it was maybe a point and it was a low scoring game uh uga's defense i don't think has given up any any points that weren't just kind of like they brought on some backup guys like defense i don't think has given up any any points that weren't just kind of like they brought on some backup guys like i literally don't think they've given up very many points at all i had those crazy stats i showed you the other day it was absurd like yeah we might go back to national titles it looks like there are 62 64 possible first place votes and UGA has 59 of them

I can't get into college football or college sports anymore because and I think a large portion of it is because I didn't go to college full time and so I don't have that like alliance outside of what I grew up I like used to love UNC

football and basketball because my whole family went there but like now i just find it hard to stay into like involved because the turnover rate of athletes especially good ones it's like i'm almost rooting for players to be just good enough to carry my team but not good enough to get poached in their freshman year and i'm like well that generational talent is gone like i mean and so i it's like a lot easier for me to build a um comfortable fan base and fandom around like pro sports but i like it more because they are still human beings they haven't become professional athlete drones yet um so they're just kids so the pressure is definitely getting to them often and and that's

a big part of the game i like that it's a different it's a different version of football it's so much higher scoring like it is just a shootout every time yeah you can have a wider kind of offense uh that's fun you know that's how you get guys like tim tebow who go on and make failures and fools themselves when they go to the pros but win titles in college but no i i love these stats for georgia georgia has won 18 straight regular games uh margin of victory and that stretch is 33 points um good they're 21 and 1 in their last 22 games they've won 17 of those games by at least three store scores um just they've outscored their opponents this season 130 to 10 jesus christ wait you know what's crazy i well it's only been three games or right then because

i watched them this week and it was like 45 nothing and i remember sitting down looking at the tv going close game huh and my cousin was like yeah i don't know why it's on and i was like we played south carolina last week, and I think it was right. That's who it was, yeah. 48 to 7. 40-something to 7. Yeah, I'm looking at it. It was 48 to 7.

But the first game, 49 to 3, was against the number 11 ranked team. Wow. That's more impressive to me. That was a whooping. I think we're playing Kent State tomorrow, or Saturday, rather. So that should be an absolute trouncing. Make sure to watch that. Yeah, but then they've got to really scrounge it together

because they've got Mizzou on the 1st of October. Is Mizzou also getting votes by chance? No, Mizzou is not looking good. They're getting votes, but it's for a different kind of – they're playing for worst team in the SEC. That's their... No, we will not be worse than Vanderbilt. Absolutely not.

But no, I'm pretty pumped. We might go back-to-back here with national titles. It's actually, you know, it's looking more likely that that happens than not, I guess. And then the Braves are doing well. I think we're going to get into the playoffs maybe as the wild card. I'm hoping so.

I haven't looked lately. The Yankees are going to make the playoffs and i know they're not the top team and they're not the top playoff team but the i just keep maintaining it's a little more interesting when the yankees are in it sure okay um i i just i just want to get another shot at the um the dodgers every year i just want the dodgers to lose and i go dodgers i don't give a fuck about baseball like i literally it is so hard 160 damn games a year and i'm like i i really truly can enjoy playoff baseball because you can kind of i feel that storyline you know the best of fives or best of seven series and stuff like i like that and it does feel like there's stakes to it and and and whatnot but i just cannot get into hey guys it's

the 48th game of the season it's our second game of four against the colorado rockies we're playing like like the game is made for people who like what have am radio or like drive like drive i agree a lot or like i agree it's really good on the radio it's so good for passive listening that i love that part of the sport because there's always a game on but i hate it as like anybody trying to be anything less than like a casual or more than a casual fan it's like that's too much no i agree i agree i usually start watching when it gets to playoff time but i don don't like regular season baseball. I don't like regular season anything, really. MMA doesn't have a regular season.

It's always a thing. It's like your blood. MMA, I'm going to start thinking, I think we shouldn't even think of it as a sport because it's a fight promotion is what we really like because I don't watch a lot of Bellator, if I'm being honest. I'm a UFC fan. That's what I am.

I like the concoction of Joe Rogan and Dana White and this weird thing that they're doing over there. I like the drama and the WWE nature of it. Today I learned that Joe Rogan has a clause in his contract that when Dana White leaves the company, he gets to go

to. I think he has the option of leaving. If Dana White leaves, the contract's over. I thought that was interesting. You think he has the option of leaving if dana white leaves a package deal over yeah i thought that was you think he wants to leave i think he would i mean that's what he said yeah the way the well joe's the one who like explained that he's like oh when he leaves i leave like that's in my contract no i mean like do you think do you think that dana exercise that is the question yeah um i think joe is a little tuckered out of the scene like he doesn't like traveling really far for events he tends to do the vegas ones um he only likes to do the big ones if there aren't fights on the card that appeal to him he just passes on them and lets someone else do

that card so the idea that joe would retire and leave the sport seems i'm not sure i'm like being a ufc commentator is a teeny tiny platform compared to his podcast well like he has a he's the biggest broadcaster on the planet all right so joe so joe started working with the ufc around ufc 11 working for free he was like like i know you can't pay me um i'll come and do this gig could you get my friends some cool tickets and like get my hotel? Like he worked like that for years. He has a passion for MMA and for the UFC. And like he I think he truly thinks of himself as blessed that he gets to go and sit where he sits. Because that's something that like I guess money can kind of buy it.

But it's so much money. It's no, no, no, no. It's access. It is literally on two fronts. You can love something and still be a part of it and whatever. And I'm sure even if he did step away, there's no way that he's going to, like, the fight of the year. Right.

Well, okay. From, like, the sport. No. Like, he would still be into it. Like, it's something that he likes. You know, it's something he cares about. He'd still get great tickets, but I don't know that he'd sit at the apron

of the ringside. Yeah, exactly. Those tickets in particular, being able to sit. And not only that, after the fight's over, he's the guy who goes in there and talks to him. You see how it is now. He's not like, hey, nice to meet you, man. They're like, Joe Rogan! What's up,

Joe Rogan? Joe Rogan experience, y'all! I'm Joe y'all i dreamed of him talking to me chael son had the best take on that ever joe rogan's like what what does it feel like you just took him out you did this that and the other he's like this moment isn't about me joe rogan this is about you i want to know how it feels to be this close to the most electrifying man in fight sports? How does it feel? Are you shaking in your boots standing next to Chael and Chael's octagon and Chael's arena surrounded by Chael's fans?

How does it feel? And he's like, Joe tries to answer, well, we don't have time for that, though. He's got this old bit, and it's like, he's killing it. It was so good. And, of course, you know that he's the this old bit and it's like he's killing it it was so good and of course you know that he's the type of guy who was in front of that mirror rehearsing this for hours but the thing about it is he's got to pull that out of his pocket after taking a beating if you watch him

do that speech he's fucked up his hair's all must up he's all scraped up and sweaty bruised under his eyes and he's still rehearsing that thing like an actor. He's great. Yeah. I don't care if he did beat those women up. Say that again? I don't care if he did beat those women up in the hotel. It's my understanding it was a fair fight.

Like, no one accused him of bringing a weapon. That's right. So he is the weapon. Yeah. Maybe they had it coming. It seems like they talked some shit who do they replace bruce with like who do they replace he still does it right yeah no at some point they will have to move on from it and there's a chubby bald guy that they do the

thing so there's a chubby bald guy that that does his gig when he's not there tremendous voice like he'll hit it you won't even miss him you honestly won't he doesn't do a little dance or anything and wear silly suits but his voice is so strong whenever he's doing the fight night cards or whenever they're in europe that guy i'm sure i always think about that i'm like they offered to fly bruce buffert to europe and he said no for some reason but he never does he always goes to the European cards but if they're in like some shithole part of the world that they're experimenting on some fight night card here comes that chubby bald guy hello and I'm like this guy will take seventeen thousand dollars to fly to Thailand we know it now yeah that that's how I think of when

Rogan doesn't headline a card like like oh is the top of the card ferguson you know he's got a hundred million dollar contract back home though that and i bet it's hard to like fly to the uk and do a card and and then get back home to do your scheduled show with or even and even if you like it like okay here's a good example how many of us or how many times did we get invited to do something you know play a game or something and you're straight up like well that that's enough for me like i don't need to do any more of that or like i'll get the i'll get it on the next beta weekend or something like you even though you love it priorities wise there's only so many times you

need to do it and there were times when it was like hey woody we'll fly you out here we'll let you participate in the opening of this thing you obviously will make videos about your experience and whatever and we'll cover your expenses like my hotel and my flight and it's like this actually just cost me a lot of money you want what to me feels like free promotion i know to you it feels like you bought a hotel on a flight but i'm over here like i didn't get any money yeah you think i wanted to visit your local holiday inn you think that's right like dude i don't want to come to sacramento literally um you know that's choosing beggars uh type scenario that happened for a long time unless the opening gets you something like like there was a time when if you got to the opening

of cod that would give you insight that would make your head value. Or it was just fun, right? If it was something you actually... I did tons of things that I was just like, oh, that'll be fun. I think I got an offer to see what was that game? Plants vs. Zombies. Yeah.

It's not worth it for me to come out there and see Plants vs. Zombies open. It just cost me money. Yeah. it was a good cell phone game i was gonna make that i think it was that it's a stupid navy seal movie i can't remember the name of it but they they like flew flew us out to la and i was like there must be i don't understand why we got to meet these people in person like like phones exist this is a fucking five and a half hour flight and they wanted me to watch the goddamn movie and at their studio on on their like private screening room and i was i was thinking like should i be great should i be thinking oh it's so nice of them to do this for me or should i be mad that they've done this to me

like why don't you send me a fucking like like there's send me an advanced copy they they can do this thing where they send you a code and you log into a server and you get this one-time pass to watch a movie and i and i you get the it's like a screener thing and i've watched movies so early that the special effects weren't done and they were comical it's like there's supposed to be an suv spinning across a bridge and they just got like wireframe shit and no audio happening. But, but I was so annoyed by that. Like,

like having to go all the way out there. Was it zero dark 30? Yeah, I was, I chose to be gracious instead and be like, thank you so much for giving me the opportunity. See this American sniper. One of those. Oh,

I would have rat American sniper would have been more money. Um, zero. No, it wasn't your 30. No, no, no, no, no, It more money. No, it wasn't Zero Dark Thirty. It was the Navy SEAL one. It was the one where it was... It doesn't matter. But it wasn't either of those.

Those were like mainstream movies. Oh, they sent you a bullshit Navy SEAL flick. I wasn't that it was bullshit. No, it wasn't Lone Survivor. Actor Valor. That was it. See, I've never heard of that one. It didn't take off.

You should have watched my video and you'd have been cued in to go watch. Yes, there's a guy who falls in the water and gets caught by FPS Russia. Yes, there is. There is. That does happen. I froze my ass off doing that. I was so shivery. I need help getting undressed.

You needed help getting undressed? That's not very Russian of you. No, I couldn't get my clothes off. They were suctioned to me. I was all cold and shivery. Did you quickly go back to regular voice Kyle? Like, get me the hell out of here. It's fucking freezing. I was in even regular voice

Kyle. I was like, okay, Scott. When I get in cold water, I hyperventilate. Okay, Scott. I don't want to do this once. I'm going to go under the water! I'm talking him through what's going to happen, and then I have to hold my breath under this water. It was the middle of winter in Georgia.

I know the water wasn't 30 degrees or something like that, but I bet it was fucking 45 or 50 or something. It was awful. It's just cold at that point. It was so goddamn cold. It was awful. It was nighttime almost. Yeah, that was stupid.

I don't like cold water. The water sucks. Next next time hopefully it's a good movie you get to go see you get your pick of the litter of of american military propaganda films that's what it was financed by the navy i think that was a big part of it sometimes you'll watch like american military movies like that and you'll be like American military movies like that. And you'll be like, I know we have our biases, but there's no way this guy was like helping deliver babies. There's just no way this was happening.

You know, they teach that in sniper school. I don't think so. I know. I saw some like funny, like posts going viral of like an American soldier, soldier in a movie who had just killed someone. And it was like a joke being like, America will conquer your country, attack and level cities. And in 20 movies, make a year about how or make a movie about how it made their soldiers feel sad.

Total sieve cultural domination that's right you're watching it's like they fought back and they yeah that's so good no we're the best we're the best uh the united states won't stop like history is written by the victors Hollywood is an incredibly powerful thing And even when we don't win We have enough money to make Vietnam seem like a win Dude, every movie I've seen Makes Vietnam seem like a push at worst I think we did okay

I'm sold on that At this point I mean Look You're only feel the other way Because you thought we were playing Dom Okay I don't know who has the T flag But we won TDM easily Look, you're only feel the other way because you thought we were playing Dom, okay?

I don't know who has the C flag, but we won TDM easily. I'm told we won every battle. Not the war necessarily, but kill confirmed. You kill them and then their ear pops up as like a glowing little rotating. If Cod had balls, that's what it would be instead of a dog tag.

You run up and quickly cut the ear off and hang it on your necklace and keep moving in one solid motion. And there'd be an ear marketplace. An ear marketplace. I like it. If you want a new skin on your gun, it's like 500 ears. Let's go. Ah, that's a bright ear. You know

lefties only. What if Tarkov introduced the Ukrainians as a faction i don't see that going well given they're a russian-based company well oh tarkov yeah they're gonna have to be kind of chill about that situation yeah you gotta as a businessman in russia or like a russian man who does business in russia you should probably not do anything political at all every day i hear about a putin ally like having an accident crossing or enemy falling out of a window like lots of falls lots of people falling very confusing some heart attacks a guy fell down the stairs i fall like once a year his

enemies are toppling over like the three fucking stooges it's crazy because they definitely I mean I know it's kind of like a broken record at this point but they do it in such an obvious way because like the whole point is that you know like it's not supposed to be you know covert it's like USA they'll kill you

quietly and somebody's like I just don't understand he had a heart attack at you know 27 years old crazy and Russia like yeah you just had a heart attack from the back of his head or something fell out of a building yeah a lot of so many buildings i've never the windows here locked antoli greshinashko fell from a great height he fell down the stairs and died here's another guy who had a stroke and quotes did you i've read that like there's a ruling where if the next of kin and the owner the family dies the russian state can take the funds like as that and so you know a couple oligarchs die and whoops looks like their son or

daughter died too and what's what's that like all of your money belongs to the russian state that's crazy like you know let's use this to offset inflation. I had this bet going with Chiz that I thought there would be a terrorist attack surrounding the Queen's funeral. It just seemed like such a big moment that maybe some awful person would do something. I thought something would happen.

I really wanted to count when that guy rushed to the coffin the other day. Did you see that? Some guy, like... So they've got... The viewing of the queen's body has been going on for days. I think it might be over now. There were people waiting in line for a dozen

hours plus. Everybody patted David Beckham on the back like he's a fucking superhero because he waited in line for the rest of the pours. There's old women doing the same shit! Fucking pat... Anyway. Not as heroically. This one guy rushed the coffin, and i don't

know what he was gonna do but they shut that shit down they were the the three fanciest dressed men you've ever seen in your life like had him on the ground wearing white gloves and like a heartbeat um the the british always have like silly ceremonial garb that they wear, but they bring out the goofy shit when a queen dies, apparently. Because this guy looks like he's a 10th prestige. This guy over here is wearing the traditional bobby cop hat that's shaped like a penis. And then Colonel Mustard's over here with a mustache that won't quit and ruffles on his shoulders.

It's absurd. They've got these guys in... One of them's wearing like a black tunic with red trim and the other one's wearing like red with black trim like it's like the targaryens or something up there it's it was so weird to see have you seen the uh have you seen like the people who fuck with the um what do you call them the the default like big hat guys at buckingham palace yeah or like and they will just smack the shit out of you like they're like we are here to guard things and you know just because we look a little silly

doesn't mean we're not here to the outfits do take away from their they do you think that they're cosplaying and they're like no these are real big stuff pull me back the other way i hear you but it's a tourist attraction. The whole place is a tourist attraction, and they seem like employees you could take pictures with, and they allow it a little, but then respectful photos may be taken.

I just feel like you get a little too close, and suddenly they're spazzing at you, screaming at you, embarrassing you. Yeah. Damn! Dude just wanted to break it down do a little robot style stuff and dude hauled off and he was just dancing damn all right well i don't maybe there's some more context maybe that was like his fourth different dance number he did he did the cabbage patch the worm the charleston

he's doing the lawnmower. He's doing the twist. And like dance number eight and dude had just had enough. I don't know. Is that a desired job position, do you think? Or is that – I wonder how much they get paid. I wonder if it's like – Jesus.

See, now that's a hardy mug that you just heard it's a solid stainless steel somehow i don't know how i don't know how they buy those i guess they're on the website or maybe only we get them i'm not sure i would like that more oh it was exclusive to us yeah i don't want anyone else to have one the average pay in the royal guard is about 38 36 grand a year okay so that's like a punishment job that's like when you wanted to be a cop but no no no that's quite right it's 36 grand a year in the royal guard so assuming you probably get bored lodging food expense and health care that's worse where are they lodging you at like a barracks full of weird hats tucker brings up a good point like sometimes you see military pay and you're like they make 30 grand a year that's awful and it's like oh well they pay for all your expenses it's like you get 30 grand which is like

the equivalent of having like a hundred grand a year salary and living in a like a normal yeah so it's just they live in london okay like i would imagine that living there is akin to living somewhere like la where everything's a lot more as they live in buckingham is that not in london yeah no they say yeah uh they say they live lavishly in buckingham lavishly oh luxurious living conditions at the buckingham palace aha so they live lavishly in buckingham lavishly oh luxurious living conditions at the buckingham palace aha so they live lavishly in the palace and they make money on top of that i'm gonna look well you don't want to like it's not medieval times i'm gonna need a 401k i mean i can just live in a castle somewhere but i guess i'm saying i live in a castle lavishly and okay so they're

like cops in a fairyland i wonder how many speak to one and be like dude is this like the job that you always wanted or is are you actively trying to get out of here right now wink wink like would you rather be a cop would you rather be like a real security guard like this is such an in-between weird fucking made-up thing yeah yeah because nobody's got it you're not like even if the entirety of the buckingham palace is being threatened immediately the people around the the police with mp5s that are standing around buckingham palace are the ones that are going to be doing anything that i mean like you you have a those guards with with rifles with the sa80s or whatever yeah they have like they have like some like real actual you know military grade weaponry and then

they have the showmanship guards that i'm not saying are not trained to kick ass i'm just saying a sword fight like yeah like what do you show up i wish somebody would show up want to start a beef with king charles and pull out a sword and start approaching and the kin. And then these guys have to pull their swords out to do some business. That would be, well, that would make my,

that would make game of Thrones worth being bad. That would fix that. If I got to see something like that, a real sword fight, I've never seen a real sword fight. I don't think I would want to. I saw a guy attack some British guy the other day with like a little hand axe and the british guy seemingly had a hand axe too and they had a little hand axe fight in the street and that was gruesome

i wonder what a real sword fight would look like what here's my like an actual sword fight but like right what kind of sword would you here's my take on it i think the side of the sword my take on it i think the side of the sword is not that useful i think the tip of the sword is what wins a sword fight like so with that like fencing but fencings are those foils are a little flexible to do real damage no but like if you have a rapier versus having like a broad sword you know who wins in this regard is it's like uh yeah like i think what you want is a mobile agile sword where you can poke with it i think it depends on the metal right like isn't there going to be like it's isn't it going to be like ufc right you're going to have strikers you're going to have like grapple

can i have a spear and a shield instead yeah see i'm we just need to go back to gladiatorial combat every time i want to see people i have your eyes you know i have the idea that it would that would be option a over any sort of like uh arm coward no i would engage there's pride on the line no i would run so goddamn fast um or a bow i'll do that would you drop your sword your spear and short sword it's way too heavy to run with I'm leaving that shit behind I might try to like sling the shield onto my back so they can't shoot me in the back as effectively

as I run but I'm running I think before I run I'm gonna analyze my opponent can I easily win can I win a foot race no like I need to know I need to know these things before I win a foot race that's a problem right I things before I cheat. If I can't win a foot race, that's a problem. I'm not built for speed, Kyle. I'm not either.

I'm not either. I don't want to have a sword fight, though. They look gruesome. I saw two chicks fight last night, and they're doing that thing where it's like a hockey fight where left hands are used to secure the other person and pull them in. Right hands are delivering the punishment. But one of them has a knife

and the other one doesn't. And the one who doesn't have a knife doesn't seem like she minds. And so she's getting stabbed in the face over and over. And I'm like, why is nobody stepping in and stopping this murder? She stabbed her so many times.

Yeah. Websites. Best fighting swords. Wow, Websites like best fighting swords. Wow, they're all over the place. An ancient Egypt. Nobody knows. I feel like Tucker's right. Just looking at and scanning through this article,

it depends on the meta. There are some people who do this sort of combat with blunted weapons on YouTube. And then they ask that guy these exact questions and he'll break it down how like spear and shield beat sword. I think it might be. But he's like, but two guys with swords and like they've done it over and over with guys who are trained with less than lethal spears and swords and shields and stuff. And the same thing pretty much happens all the time when you take certain weapons

against certain other weapons. Yeah, I mean, it's rock, paper, scissors almost. Yeah, yeah, it's a lot like that. That's why RPG games are so good when you've got that sort of aspect going on. Can't wait for that. I need a new game to play. I've been watching a lot of gameplay trailers. I do like the idea of using that Xbox

with mouse and keyboard, though. I'm hoping that Tucker has spoiled it now by telling me it's going to feel like shit. I'm sorry. Yeah, it's just not going to do it for you. i do like the idea of using that xbox with mouse and keyboard though i'm hoping but but tucker has spoiled it now by telling me it's gonna feel like sorry yeah it's just not gonna do it for you that's not the way you want it to which really sucks but no i want a new game though um i saw that uh gta 6 all their all those assets got leaked yeah and they're making a huge deal out of it and to me it's the biggest leak in the in the history of video games not in the history can can you pause there and explain to me why so i saw a little bit of the leak and it was like a person walking around and and i couldn't tell that the graphics were revolutionary there was print all over the screen i'm like this is a leak that tells

me nothing about this game uh what am i missing you did not watch all of the content i mean there's like 20 different little clips and stuff i don't know are you up to speed on it like did was it interesting to you it was interesting enough to me um but i am gonna be honest with you like i just looked into it at pretty like face level So ironically enough, Trevor T. Martin texted me and was like, you see the leaks? And I was like, what? Like, oh, okay, maybe he's trying to confirm it. The reason that it got leaked

is their Slack channel got hacked or phished rather. An employee had their Slack channel phished and then they went into the Slack channel and took all the developmental videos and stuff. It's not gonna look good because it is an alpha build. So it has none of the polishing, right? You're just looking at framework. But what was cool is that there's videos of, like,

the entire engagement with, like, you walking into a burger joint and then robbing it, then, like, how that works, going out, taking heat, hiding. Like, there's animation pickup drop-down. It's not that, like, the video itself is, like, look at the next- gta it's that look you can see the framework for a lot of what's coming and it yeah it spoils the surprise but like it's certainly made predictably everybody who saw it they're like we're waiting eight years for this

pile of shit like we've played alpha builds of games they like they're not gonna look good and i thought this looked pretty good so i felt like it got undue hate yeah i felt this exact same way i didn't understand on one hand i don't understand kyle we lost your audio right after i don't understand i know you hate that um yeah so i'm not a grand theft auto guy i just didn't understand like why it was interesting i even still don't get it you're like oh it showed him like a pickup animation. And I'm like, that's interesting to people. I mean, it's not. I don't think it's necessarily that.

Like, I'm not sitting there drooling over the pickup animation, but I'm also not doing the same with Call of Duty. But, you know, people care about Call of Duty's pickup animation or something like that to a level. So I think it's more exciting that like, hey hey this little thing that we know was in development like usually we'd wait and then we'd get like a trailer and we'd see rendered footage of what they want to show us that gives us no idea of like how what is a day what is like you walking around the city feel like and it gave us more info into like what's the city look like and didn't i see a female protagonist yeah there's a fee we know there's a female protagonist at the very that's huge now that's the that's the only thing where i'm like okay now this is different because they're switching back and forth i think that there's confirmation well yeah the ability to do anything like that is is

kind of new because correct me if i'm wrong but you're always like their guy they pick you your guy i remember people being like do i have to be black on the last one? There was a huge thing about that. And so the ability to have multiple protagonists or different sexes, that's all new stuff. But I don't see it as this big loss. That statement from Rockstar was like, we are devastated

that this has happened and this beautiful thing has been released and you know it now. And it's like, dude, nobody this beautiful thing has been released and you know it now. And it's like, dude, nobody fucking cares. Like, like,

did you think that you were going to be like, look, and we were all going to like, Oh my God. Like, like I know we were, but that hasn't gone away. Everybody's like spoiling it though.

Like you, like there, I think that there, there's no way that they can react any other way than saying they're devastated. Right? Like they had, they had the project files i

don't understand why game features are spoilers you know like it's not like they told me um who the bad guy is and how the story ends necessarily but it gave you already it has helped shape people's opinions of the game and they've seen what is far and beyond not what anybody would like stupid people if they're judging alpha footage? If they're saying the graphics are bad, like, dude, that's... I saw so many other developers backing Rockstar up and being like, this is what our game looked like in alpha. This is what our game looked like in alpha.

And showing you all these beautiful games that we know now looking like garbage or like incomprehensible stick figures in an in an ocean of polygons stuff like that yeah it's uh it'd be a lot like um having you know having some you got a crush on this girl and she comes to over and sees your room your room looks like it's pretty nice but it's like not good looking and you're gonna be embarrassed about it right you know it's not that you're not like you're you got a good thing going but i just think that they were like why couldn't we just you wait a little bit we'll clean the place up. It'll look way better.

Like just, but now you've got this idea. Yeah. I don't know. Do we know anything about the release date? Uh, 2024 or some shit like that. I don't know if there's a hard release date,

uh, or like even like a general year, but that's what I think just given looking at this, it's not going to be next year it's so long between games so yeah so long when did it come out is it already seven years old something like more than that uh eight yeah 2013 it's too long because it needs to come out quick enough that people are the same generation of gamers they've been supporting it so much though and changing it that that it kind of has done that it's had this like multiple life thing um rockstar i'm gonna probably get this

wrong somebody can hard check this but and it's gonna maybe sound like i'm talking about my ass but i'm pretty sure that rockstar made more money on microtransaction shark cards than they ever made off the hard original sales of any games like something like a billion dollars in revenue over shark cards and it's like well if you're making revenue that is like twice the revenue of a red dead redemption just off of your existing content selling fake money in gta why are you in set you're not exactly waking up every morning like fuck we gotta hurry up on this one like they're like making money hand over fist so i think that allows you time to not feel pressured and rushing it and maybe that's kind of like another reason why they reacted that way they're like well we're not gonna hurry it up like yeah we're making money

i'm not thirsting for it like like i i for some reason i wasn't into gta 5 at all i just had lost my interest in that type of game i don't get it anymore um maybe if i played the like online thing where everybody's running around role-playing, I see people being cops. A lot of fun. Yeah. A better example for that. And what I'm talking about is like half-life three. People were pining for half-life three at a time when the people who played

half-life two, I think I have my versions, right. Are like not even gamers anymore. Like I played this at 16 years old. Now I'm 30. They're barely even gamers. Like what is this?

Half-Life three. Isn't going to sell like you think, because these people are like raising children. I feel like GTA might be making that mistake. No, no, it's huge. It's huge.

It's, it's like the only game where, I mean, I think they said that they were going to try and rein it in a little bit, but like the fact still stands that if you want a game where you can go in with your friends and 25 other people and blow shit up, and then...

It's basically what Fortnite is doing, right? You can do races in GTA, roleplay in GTA, you can do custom maps, TDM, whatever. It's like its own little micro... It's an expensive game to create, too. It's a meta. It cost a quarter billion dollars to produce or something. It was some expensive game to create, too. It's a meta. It cost a quarter billion dollars to produce or something. It was some absurd cost to produce that game.

It's hugely profitable. And I know that it's still very popular. I see it on Twitch a lot. I never watch because I just don't give a shit. It feels like I'm the only one arguing to reinvest this game. I know it cost a quarter million to make, but I'm looking at 800 million yearly over the course of the last nine years

is $7.2 billion, right? I'm looking at 800 million yearly over the course of the last nine years is 72, 7.2 billion, right? Plus the sales. So we're at $13 billion. I think I did it right. Right. So we're at $13 billion in sales for a quarter billion investment.

And everyone is like, dude, just let it ride. I'm like, no, no, literally again, do it again.

But they are doing that. What do you mean? Like you're literally like rocks like in a decade though like but remember this okay all right they built the it took years to get to gta5 okay in the first place and that game came out on playstation 3 right it came out two generations of consoles ago so now it's like to build a game in your head that you know is going to take five plus years of development and you're trying to consistently keep up with the next gen tech. So you're always like, hey, is our platform robust enough to keep doing that? Is the game engine going to be able to handle that?

It's a lot more than just throwing money at the problem when you're actively fighting against tech advancements in time like that. Because Unreal Engine 5 didn't exist. It was like Unreal Engine 3 back then. And you're like... Yeah. I don't know the answer to that.

I accept your argument that it's hard. I just can't line up with it's not worth it. No, no, it's not that it's not worth it. Okay, same thing. You're a sysTech guy. Why does Call of Duty have server problems on launch day? Just buy more servers. Well, you know, yeah, that doesn't work, right?

Right, like there's scalability stuff. Yeah, yeah. Sometimes I do this to imagine it. Imagine you have two computers and you need to connect them. It's one line, right? Simple as that. Imagine you have two computers, you need to connect them. It's one line, right? Simple as that. Imagine you have three connect computers and you need to connect them. Well, now you have like a triangle, right? It's kind of feasible. Let's do four. Well, it's not a square anymore because now some computers are two jumps away. So it's a square with kind of an X in the middle. Now do five, do 10. How many lines does it take

to connect 10 computers all to each other directly like it's getting really complicated and you take this problem and you scale it like to a larger level and it's like oh it's not just a matter of throwing more computers at it because the lines of communication get too crossed and too numerous and it doesn't scale literally six computers don't do twice as much as three you have a problem that's not so now you need to do it in a more clever way that's why you can't always just throw more money in it oh that's interesting thank you for that explanation yeah and but and i think the game dev is equally similar like you can have more people developing assets you can have more

people working on individual stuff but at a certain point you're only able to turn out as much new content on your existing platform. You can't rewrite the entire existing platform and then update it in secret. That's what Counter-Strike has been doing in general with Source and Source 2. And it's like, you know, there's not a flip. They're not just going to flip a switch. It's like slowly you see bits and pieces get added to it. So like, I don't know. it's just hard to think of the spaghetti code being patched together with more billions of dollars to fix it yeah i don't know and there's still the little part of me that's like but but the money yeah this is a 13 billion dollar product it's worth making another one to get...

What is it? 26 times your return? Jesus Christ. I wonder if it's the most profitable game ever. Is it? If you strangle that... There's been those little ridiculous tiny games that just did bonkers. Yeah, you just say Among Us would win.

Or Minecraft, yeah. Or what's the one where you bounce the ball around with the fucking cars with cars oh rocket league rocket league yeah well rocket league's not anywhere near that but like the but you know i just don't think it costs much to make i i don't know that game was actually something else it was called like super rocket turbo cars or something and then they just like like well that didn't get super popular. And then like three years later, it came out with Rocket League. I'm one step away from the guy who owns Rocket League.

Do you remember Heather? Who used to do our stuff? Her, I think, brother-in-law owns the company that made Rocket League. Wow, Psyonix. Yeah. I met him. I met him at a wedding having to do with Heather's family. And he was just showing me

the stuff he was working on. Before Rocket League, that company was much smaller. He was doing good mobile platform games at a time when everyone else was doing Flappy Bird. He shows me this thing that's spaceships rocking around. I was like,

holy shit, I didn't know an iPad could even do this. But it turned out Rocket League was his big hit. Ambitious dude. There's a game coming out called the Callisto Protocol. I started watching the trailer for it and I was like, man,

this looks just like Dead Space to me. It is, yeah. It's actually the spiritual successor. It absolutely is. i don't know if this is dead space two or three uh those were both kind of abominations i've seen the lead guy talk about how shitty it was making those games and how much interference there was how they wanted to like oh we need co-op now and he's like this is a horror game the idea of having a buddy with you like ruins the no co-op moody woody and i played that game co-op it was dreadful

yeah you can't play that game co-op. I don't remember. If we finished it, it was an act of labor. It was a labor. I think that we finished it the same way that you finish anything else that you're just like, alright, we got it done. Let's get the fuck out of here. There's six hours left of this game.

Let's just hammer it down. I think that even... We were releasing videos with that content. Eventually, I just put up like a four hour video i think i remember getting stuck in that part where we were um like like flying through space and avoiding space garbage and like what do you make it through and i think you're better than me but for some reason that thing wasn't your cup of tea i hit that space garbage like eight nine ten times in a row and we're recording and i'm just like i'm getting in a row. And we're recording. And I'm just like, I'm getting mad. Yeah, you're like, we're wasting time.

I think you're embarrassed, right? Like, is that why you were mad? I just want to get on with it. And it's not even like, it's almost like I would get so deep into it. And then I get hit by, you're like, you're flying real fast through space junk. And you've just got to avoid it like this. And from a first person or maybe a third person a third person it's a third person weird camera so you're like trying to like judge depth too i hit a lot of shit i hit a lot of shit uh for sure i hated that but

this game the callisto protocol absolutely is a is a successor it has the stomp it has like um how the uh the the hud is in is somewhat built into the player's back and their suit. It has a similar suit. The weapons look similar. I mentioned the stomp. There's even those like, I don't know what you call them. There's little interactive moments where you get like sort of taken by the game and go do like a scripted thing. I saw the character getting going like down a drain and he's like sitting on his ass going through the being going down this

like water slide type thing and he has to shoot there was a similar thing in dead space where like this tentacle comes out and grabs you by the foot out of nowhere and up ends you and you're like what the fuck and you have to really awkwardly shoot the tentacle three times maybe before it drags you across the floor and kills you and it was i there's only one instance like that in the whole game i saw him talk about how laborious it was to like code that and like make that work like weeks and weeks of time they tried to take it away from me i wanted it i wanted it and we did it and right back into this game so i'm psyched about this i'm definitely gonna get callisto protocol as soon as it comes out.

I didn't see the release date, but it looks like exactly what I like. Well, that's cool. That's cool. For me, that game is Borderlands. Like, yeah, it's had a couple misses, but I remember the initial one so fondly. If they came out with a new Borderlands,

I would give it attention. You know I tried to stream Borderlands with Harley and somebody else, right? I don't know. Oh my God. I was like, they were like, Harley's on. Stream with Harley. And I was like, yeah, sure. I'll stream with Harley.

And I was like, but we've got to come up with a game that Harley can play that I can also play. And we settled on Borderlands 2 somehow, which everyone was the good one. We took a poll. We were like 20 minutes into that game and I felt so uncomfortable with how bad the game was that I was just like ants in my pants

wanting to get out of my chair. It felt laborious. I'd rather do work. I'd rather write a report or something. You ever been forced to learn about something you're not interested in? Now as adults, we learn about what we're interested in. I'm going to learn about Vikings. That's cool.

They used to make us learn about shit we didn't care about. That's dreadful. That's what it feels like playing that game. Ten more minutes, guys. Ten more minutes. Just letting you know. Nope. I fucking hate it. Don't tell me about settings they're all on yep yep nope nope i just fucking hate it nope another a better gun ain't gonna fix it guys we're gonna play poker harley it takes a while to get into

like it you said like 20 minutes into it i hated it yeah that tracks because yeah like your character hasn't really started to like feel his oats yet you haven't invested your tokens into more abilities and stuff like that i'll be honest i could imagine a world where my gun was as cool as it could be and the enemies died super fast and i still didn't care like i just what i hadn't i've been playing games like tarkov where like even poker has this similar thing where it's like when we lose that was real money that guy has my money now and he's being polite about it but we both know he's happier because he's got my he's stolen my money now like and i play games like tarkov and rust and stuff and

then i go to something like that there's just no stakes it's like we're saying with tucker earlier like why would i play team deathmatch and call of duty unless i'm being paid to play team deathmatch and call of duty i'd never do that for fun it doesn't look fun the experience you talked about playing a game and really wishing you weren't in it that's how fallout went for me i was playing fallout and i just walked and walked and walked to places i didn't really care about a story i couldn't pay attention to to dialogue that required more attention than i had at the moment and i was streaming too so when you stream i watched yeah you helped you guided it didn't help though i tried a little you know i was so stoned

you were so stoned yeah at the end you're like what i'm really sorry i gave you all bad directions and i'm really high yeah i think i was trying to get you to the part where you like the girl gives you the rifle and teaches you how to shoot the bottles and i wanted to get you that rifle and then get out of good springs and go to prim and like like just get that done because you run into npcs you meet you see all these crucified people you learn about the legion which is all these assholes wearing hockey gear pretending like they're Caesar's Legion. You get the story moving along, but somehow it was so stoned that, like, I don't know. We were fighting lizards and shit.

A lot of time traveling, not seeming to get anywhere. Oh, that's right. I got lost. I went the wrong way. Yeah. Yeah, so it was a rough initial experience. And then if you're like me, have this like anxiety of trying to put on a show I'm live streaming right so the whole

chat is just telling me that they're not happy with what's happening and then that is part of my gaming experience see that game is so beloved and it's got this it'd be like Tarkov right if you just if someone had played Call of Duty before and they're like oh jump into Tarkov oh I need to set everything up no I don't

set anything up fucking Fucking get in there. Alright, you're in a match now. Fuck. Alright, what do I... Oh, you're dead. What are you doing? I'm trying to watch some fun here. Alright, now you're going to need a new loadout. How do I do that? Dude, you're wasting a lot of time here healing. Come on. You're like, you're

feeling the pressure and you don't know what the fuck you're doing. And Fallout's like that. Like, before I started a new Fallout, I just started a new fallout bill. Like, like I spent three hours modding it before I began the play through. Then I spent like 20 minutes. I'll call it researching how I wanted to put those special points, what slots I wanted them in.

And then there's a whole plan, like what to do as far as that's super important. Don't you get more points later on to like compensate? i mean just so there's intelligence and strength and you wanted to do 10 9 but you fouled up and did 9 10 along the way can't you just put it where you would have you totally um it depends uh if it was like one away that ain't a big deal but like let's say you made your strength three and you decide you want to be able to beat people up. Well, the perk that lets you like knock people out with one punch, you have to be seven strength for that. It's like, oh, well, we're just fucked.

We're at seven levels to even of just wasting strength. Meanwhile, there's a perk over here with like nine points in it. And we really should be accessing the perks that that gives us access to down on the bottom on the the perks are stronger it's and they're better so you plan ahead and the builds have names it's just like any other rpg really i want to be a samurai well you can so you're going to need the the perk that actually gives you a samurai helmet that'll be strength 10 you need to know those things going in so yeah that's a terrible game to play what i'll call raw because dude like before i know the game inside out i've got that a thousand two thousand hours and i don't start a playthrough without

watching some videos so it's just us have you been lifting lately are you still in the gym yeah yeah i finally got it cooled off in there i'm so happy i was scared wiring that motherfucking um air conditioner i didn't want to do it by myself but someone wanted twelve hundred dollars for the install alone after i'd already purchased the thing and i don't know what it costs i like to forget little things like that but i don't know eight hundred to twelve hundred dollars itself and i was like dude you're not charging me i lied to him in the text message i was like i just found a master electrician who works for 50 can you believe it i can't imagine it will take dozens and dozens of hours at that rate and he's like he just wrote back good luck all right let's order some tools and i like spite installed an air conditioner but nice but But no, I'm going to be much happier now.

It's cooled off in there. I haven't bothered with the rubber floor. I just wanted to get moving because the rubber floor requires me to rent a truck. And then I don't want to do it. I don't want to get them here. Amazon delivered mine. Oh, see, I want to do um the what is it called the tractor um supply store at the tractor supply store they're like considerably cheaper those stall mats are and they caught wind

that lots of guys were building their home gyms using stall mats so they got a new stall mat that's made for gyms at the tractor supply store and those are really good but degassing them which makes them not stinky you know it takes a couple days and a scrub and everything and it's just laborious they're so heavy as you know so i think i'm just gonna skip it i'm only here for nine more fucking months and then i'm okay going somewhere else i uh yeah i bought like a higher level rubber mat and it's because it it's not yours is a garage gym so presumably any of that gassing if you don't do it perfectly will go outdoors mine would go into the master

bedroom so that would suck yeah right and like i'm told those the horse stall mats which is level lower than you're talking about can kind of have like give off that odor indefinitely you know that room always smells a little bit like horse. Everyone says to use that. There's a special cleaner. It's like Mean Green or something. I've heard of it. They're all about that stuff. They're like, yeah, use the hose and then let it soak.

The sun shining on it's a big deal. What it is is they use recycled tires. Whatever that petroleum or whatever that's like locked into the rubber has to like leach out or something it's a it's a pretty powerful smell but you won't want to work out i like sometimes i throw up in the gym anyway i don't need something like that going on what the hell i feel like that's not doing it right you know but i know you're doing it right all my all my favorite youtubers say that i should be throwing out they're like you're not doing it right yeah so i i lifted on like a thursday and then i went

and got the motorcycle we talked about earlier and then i got the surgery on my nose and i can't lift for two weeks so it's been like two weeks already yeah and there'll be whatever three more days before i can lift again. So I haven't done anything. How's the wound looking better? A lot better. I think it's going to heal. There's still some redness under it, but the,

um, you can see the, the scar like that's there. Yeah. Really well attached and mild. So like on either side of the cut, you're like, Oh, it's still a little raw there maybe the stitches what he had face cancer yeah i'd say you're looking at a cancer survivor tucker

so a duo of us yeah honor us please i'm sorry you bought our bracelets uh you know i remember man whatever happened to all of those in a landfill somewhere? They killed turtles in the grove. I mentioned last show, Jackie's going to see a plastic surgeon. Well, she saw him, not for the surgery, but for a pre-surgery consult. And she brought pictures of me. She's like, hey, here's my husband. You want to look at him again? You know, like five more days into the healing.

I'm glad she did that. Yeah, it was cool of her. And again, the plastic surgeon is like, this is going to be fine. That kind of knows him kind of really because we'll pay you some money just to get around in there really and he says that he's like yeah you know if it doesn't heal right you can come to me but you won't have to yeah it's kind of so he's looked at my pictures twice now and said to be cool have you talked to anybody about like a scar cream to put on it afterwards yeah actually so they sold a scar cream for a hundred bucks and they sent her home free with it or free included with the 25 000 surgery she's getting but uh yeah yeah i mean

you got to throw some little things in here and there yeah yeah do you remember the name of it is it a prescription or is it i don't i could text jackie what the name of it is i just curious like like i've always used maderma uh which is over-the-counter stuff um and uh like i know that i've recommended to taylor he used it for some scars he had and i've always used it with like scars that i would get and it really works takes a lot of the red out you have to use it every fucking day though it's part of your routine now so i'm using something else that the that my surgeon gave me until the stitches come out, which is Monday, and then I switch over to something you're talking about. It's some sort of medical-grade silicone. I don't

know. Oh, cool. She hasn't written back yet. She hasn't read it yet. But in any case, they did give me some scar cream to use post-Monday. I saw that a new season of 60 Days In came out. And it was like $25 or get a seven-day trial with something called Friendly without an I.

F-R-N-D-L-Y, some app. And I grabbed it. The Dolphin Finder. What Friendly is, it's like old people cable. It's like basic cable for $9 a month. It's got like the History Channel. It's what my dad watches because there's no internet where he lives and uh and i'm like fucking don't forget cancel at the end of the month all right go and uh it's happy it's filmed during the pandemic here local to me in in in

georgia and uh i'm like i see those kind of cop cars all the fucking time. This is where I go when they get me, I guess. It is so bad. First of all, they've got that familiar cast of crews. They've got overweight white woman who thinks she's tough because of this. They've got muscled up Spanish guy who borderline cries when he gets mad and is way too aggressive for the jail that he's been put in. Like he's the problem now. And,

and so they get in there and they're like, Oh, first things first, 14 day quarantine. And everybody goes into two man cells for the next 14 days, 23 hours in one hour, 23 hours in one hour out. And they are all going crazy

and two of them have quit like a day in because it's like all the other prisoners are losing their shit, they're kicking doors all night long and then sleeping all day long and then the other ones take like meds so they're so doped up they can sleep through the noise so this lady who's like trying

not to be a morphine addict anymore is like just taking it and going crazy crying in there it's awful it's the worst season that i've ever seen i'm glad that i didn't pay for it i can't wait to cancel friendly it's terrible they're just in i'm sure at some point they get out of quarantine because the whole point is the interaction with the interaction they get an hour a day and guess guess guess who they interact with each other because they immediately were like did the sick he the other prisoners. They get an hour a day. And guess who they interact with? Each other. Because they immediately were like, did the signal.

He's like, the signal is I've got a headache. And this guy is like, you had any headaches yet, man? And he's like, yeah, I get headaches all the time. You know how I be. Oh, yeah? You ain't having a headache right now? Nah, not right now. They're like, guys, okay, you can just, you get it. You both know.

They go on with this for so long that I'm like, guys, okay, you can just, you get it. You both know, they go on with this for so long that I'm like, Jesus fuck. Yeah, we know. So now they're just buddies now. It's a terrible fucking show. And I ran out of things to watch. So I had to break down and watch the new Game of Thrones. And it's not that bad.

I watched, I think I'm three episodes in. Matt Smith, you know, the guy that played Doctor Who. I like him anyway, and he's a main character. He's like the brother of the king and kind of does things his own way. They try to make him the funny guy. I think he's funny, but he also castrates people in the streets. So he's a little scary in the streets. He's a little scary. In the streets? In the streets.

He's a pretty hardcore fella. Then this little blonde girl is kind of the other main character. I'm okay with that. I like her a lot. I think that we're fast-forwarding in time. Already three episodes in and several years have passed. I think they're about to recast her with an older actress.

The little kid did a great job acting and uh so far i've liked it i just feel like they had this little battle that involves dragons and battleships and stuff and i'm just like this seems like a minor league thing who's our bad guy here like i don't even remember what his name was he doesn't even have a real name he's just the crab feeder or something he's got like a video game title i i just feel like the events are a little small right now but i'm only three episodes in i like that doesn't look like that we made fun of the helmet right but they had the bat wings now that i've watched the show that's like his silly helmet that he wears when he's jousting i think it's supposed to be silly because they're kind of doing some silly jousting, which he takes way too seriously.

I forget almost how game of Thrones was propelled by the Ned Stark season. You know that it was his performance, Sean Bean, I think that, uh, that really made season one so great. And season two, you're like,

what are they even going to do? And I know Tyrion, what was his name? The, the actor, little foot okay and uh whoever played joffrey carried the next season or so but it's like if that first season didn't have sean bean in it i'm not sure game of thrones would have been recognized as the show it was i think look this is good um this is doing bonkers views okay it's it's it's gonna be it's not gonna end anytime soon they're gonna do their thing because it's incredibly successful again they're moving time forward um the the lannister that we met this guy named jason lannister i recognize the actor but i

wouldn't know his name i think maybe he was in 300 or something like that. But I liked him immediately. And they're framing him as such a douchebag. But I'm just like, nah, that's cool. He's bragging, but he's bragging about some real shit. He meets the main character and he's like, my name's Jason Lannister. I'm from Casterly Rock. I own it. And they're there for a big hunt. And he's like, yeah, this is fine hunting land. Believe me. A kingly forest. The best hunting, of course, is Casterly Rock and our wood. Every time something comes up, he brags about a thing he has. But it'll be like, I do, of course, have the most gold

in existence. i own it you know because i'm me and he's trying to like be nice to this girl and she's just not having it and i'm like you know i think i think she'd swoon for the gold i think i am i want to suck jason lannister's dick he's got a twin brother i'll let them both get on board if i could be part of that stuff it's it seems like he's a cool character and i hope there's more of him i guess i like the show i guess i like the show i don't love it but i like it and i'm going to continue to watch it i didn't watch all there was available i think there's four or five episodes or something there's lots of dragons um there's lots of there's i've seen some people get burnt alive um again saw a man get castrated randomly. Wasn't prepared for it. There's been a lot of bitching and

moaning about how much it sucks to be a girl and a woman, but I'm okay with that too because it kind of does in this time. There's a part where a king needs a new wife and they're like, I'm making up a name. Janna, she'd be perfect. And they break it down. The bloodline is this. The father has that.

She's beautiful. And then the king goes, she's 12. She's 12. And the guy goes, she'll mature, my grace. And so he meets her, and she's this cute little 12-year-old girl.

And she's like, I'll give you good heirs, my lord, i'll be faithful blah blah blah and he's like is that what your father told you to say he's like yeah he's like what did your mother tell you she's like that i wouldn't have to bed you until i was 14 and he's like even him he's like like even the man who lives in these times is like fuck too much like but everybody's like no my lord take the child like everybody's like that's the right thing to do and they're they're shaming him for not wanting to marry the child it's it's pretty cool uh i like it i like the show i like the little girl little girl's kind of a badass. She's got her own dragon. They all have dragons.

No, the 12-year-old has no cool factor. She's just a womb. A prop. But our main character, who's the princess, I'm getting into a little bit of light spoilers here, but the whole issue is that the king doesn't have a son. He needs an heir. And who are we going to pick for the whole issue is that the king doesn't have a son. He needs an heir, and who are we going to pick for the heir? The king's brother, of course, wants.

He's like, hey, either you make a son or it's me. And the king is like, either I make a son or my daughter, whichever one is convenient at the moment. And his daughter's left floating there in the middle like, am I the queen or not? Maybe.

And so it's pretty awkward as far as that goes but it's i do see why it's tough to be a girl now that you're laying it out like that but there's my knee-jerk reaction was name a time in history when being a beautiful woman was hard i mean it depends on your version of hard i look it's never been harder to be pretty than it was to be ugly. I guess there's sometimes, but not as a rule. In general, if you're ugly, it is going to be harder than if you're pretty. Yeah, in general. And I think there's even a discussion in one of the episodes where someone tells the girl, I think Jason Lannister tells her,

everybody would kill to be you. She's like, not if they could be me. And I'm thinking like, you're a princess! You rode here on a dragon! You're hanging out with this, the richest man in the world is wooing you right now, and you're telling him to shove it up

his ass, and like, this is your day. It's a little hard to feel sorry for her that she can't cement her reign because it seems like being a princess is pretty sick yeah so yeah i'm having a hard time like feeling like there's any like real threat or scary thing in this universe that we can't handle because when the chips are down, we're all, everybody's a badass and everybody has a dragon. Lord of the Rings is out now too, right?

I won't watch that one. Because it doesn't have the Cimerella Million lore? Oh no, I'm just racist. Hmm. Okay. No, it's a bunch of things. It's not Little Mermaid. It doesn't look good to me.

I have no problem with the mermaid i'll probably watch little mermaid no i have a bigger issue with the mermaid i don't know like if winnie the pooh came back as a brown bear i'd be like he had a very distinctive look it was part of the smoky the bears he starts horning in on the fire business then i'm gonna call foul that's i don't that's a yellow man taking a brown man's job if fucking kevin spacey played muhammad ali i'd be like no we have to pay some sort of homage as to what this character is supposed to look like mel gibson's gonna play martin luther king next year you saw that right i did see that yeah uh look i i don't mind there being black dwarves and and and like fantasy characters in there.

But what's weirder is when there's only one. Like, are we to believe that... It's just one guy and the entire Hobbit Shire is like... You're like, why did you just throw one guy in? He doesn't have a family. There's nobody else. Because in reality, if he were truly this aberration, this dark elf, everyone would, in a non-offensive way be like tell me sir what land do you come from where there's dark is ebony like they would just be curious right

and he'd be like ah i come from the dark isles of the west side like he would all my all my folk are dark of skin like i'd love that if you told me that i'd be like cool but when there's just one random black dwarf like hanging out or something i'm just like where's his people did they like rescue him from like or the black elves and the white dwarves at war with one another and then they rescued a black one like tell me the story because i do notice that that person's skin is darker than everyone else's and they live under the fucking ground. Yeah, I guess

something about the... The mermaid should be green anyway. Yeah. I don't know why she should be green. I don't care what color the mermaid is for some reason. I guess she's just saying she's a fish. She should have some of those weird little critters

attached to her like navel area. Like lamprey eels. Yeah, like STD. Like little groupies. The real mermaid is Davy Jones from Pirates of the Caribbean. I need me some like octopus centric man. Remember in the lighthouse that mermaid

that he was fucking with that weird that's a great movie. i guess i just a lighthouse i watched the last five minutes of that movie by accident oh you should we should watch the first 95 or whatever came before i know it's fan i know it's really really good it's pretty wild it's not my type of movie i'm sorry the four by three black and white it's just it's not for everybody but i'll say this if you want like a weird like find the best scene of it's willem dafoe going on this soliloquy this rant where where like he's like drunk and mad and like the and robert pattinson's kind of sitting down looking up at him while he paces back and forth and he's just i can't duplicate it but it's like

a sea shanty mixed with a rant that's just unhinged about crazy shit and it's really fucking good i like the movie but it being four by three and black and white is it takes a minute to get buckled into that yeah why would they make that decision artistic you know it's like an artistic decision i don't get mad at when people do different aspect ratios or frame rates right like it didn't they shoot uh the hobbit and like 38 yeah 48 instead of 24 like and like yeah that did look jarring right the cinematic fps and stuff but like i don't care that much it's not it's not a big deal um but that specifically it just makes it a little bit harder for me to get into it because it's like actively taking it's not an enhancement quality it's a purposeful like degradation of the film that you're shooting it on

yeah yeah oh but um what was i gonna say other than oh i won't watch lord of the rings though i just won't um i don't think it's gonna be very good like the fan reception seems bad. It seems like it's a story about, I keep seeing the black dwarf queen and an angry black woman. Her face is always like real mean in the camera. Does the queen have a beard? No, not really. And then, and then I keep seeing like glad real all mean faced all the time.

And it's like, it just seems like it's about a bunch of angry women. And, and then there's that one little munchkin faced guy. And, and so I guess I'm just not interested in what they're selling and the fan reception seems to be mixed at best so i'm really hoping they fail that'd be cool i'm watching stranger things i'm on season two right now and i heard season three was good so we'll get there okay so i watched season one like when it came out and then i got arrested so

i didn't i i felt like weed was a key component to that show being amazing because i was blown away by season one it truly is some of the best tv there's ever been season one of game of thrones stranger things okay but then i heard about how bad two was i heard it was real bad and then um uh i watched the uh like the last episode recently season of season four because it was just on in the room and it was like stranger things is up yeah yeah yeah um and so i tried not to like pay too much attention but just glancing at it it looked really fucking cool like crazy special effects and stuff maybe it's four that's good. I heard it got good. I heard four is good. I heard two is bad. I heard two is bad

also. We're just, whatever, one or two episodes in now, so I can't say. I want to ask some MMA questions. Oliveira is about to lose his title, right? He's about to face that Islam fellow. In a way, he already

lost his title because he lost he missed weight true but let's pretend like that's not because the espn likes to because he won the fight okay sure yeah i mean he's not walking away with the belt the other man is when they when they fight on saturday or whenever it is so i was one of those people who believe that charles olivia oliviera was um kind of only champ because khabib left like you know he won the vacant belt and was one of the weaker record champs to have yeah and then he just starts kicking ass and every time i'm like well now he's gonna go against a real fighter like gaethje wins now he's gonna go against a real fighter like poirier wins beats him too and it's like well fuck and he chokes somebody else out too uh he he's been yeah he

takes so much damage when he fights like he he gets knocked down by punches and every one of those fights and then he gets back up and knocks them down and either tkos him or chokes him the fuck out and it's like this is such a reckless style that a guy like islam who's gonna wrestle fuck him and smash him it just seems so easy for him to beat this guy i i don't know what the odds are what the line is or whatever but i would happily bet even money if somebody wanted to that islam was gonna take that belt like 100 in my opinion i don't i don't i just can't imagine it going the other way. How good is his opponent? Because I mix his opponent up with the other dude with the bad mouth, the Chemaev

or something. Yeah, this is Khabib's boy. This is the one that Khabib has been screaming. Like, give my guy a chance. Put him in there. Your belt is fake. Put him in there. He's been chanting this guy's name forever. We're about to find out. When is the fight? It's soon, right?

Oh, I get them mixed up sometimes, the multiple cards, but he's 22-1, Islam is. It's October 22nd, so a month away. Not as soon as I thought. Dude, you know the fight I'm looking forward to? Jake Paul versus Anderson Silva. Jake Paul KOs him. Anderson Silva, I shook that man's hands at a pub g event when we played together such a nice guy but they felt like you know when

you just like you're like man i don't know if you got it in you like the fight in you anymore because you fought so much kind of feel uh but also jake like i i don't know like it's gonna be a show in person i've seen jake fight and i'm like not paid by the way of course but like is it gonna be an interesting fight for sure but i don't think that's gonna be the bastion of good fights in general no i was curious if you possibly like met both of them at one time and like i haven't met jake but like 2016 yeah yeah yeah he's a lot bigger now. Yeah. I met Logan around the same time, and he was very big.

I don't know which one of them is bigger in real life, but Logan is a big, big dude. I mean, I'm sure he's bigger now. They're both on fucking steroids and working with professional trainers, right? So they're fucking huge. I think he KOs Anderson. I think Anderson's old and way way past his prime and i think that jake has plenty of power and anderson likes to get cute like like he's done it so many times

he's gonna get caught eventually round after round after round he's gonna get caught and i feel like it's just as likely that he gets knocked down three times in a row and the ref stops it that could that's just as likely. Not talking about you necessarily, but people, I think, misinterpret the way Anderson Silva gets cute. So here's the score for those of you who don't watch a lot of fighting. He's a counterpuncher, right?

So what he does is he sits there. He waits for you to throw, which opens up a window for him to, you know, your defense is gone and he takes advantage of that. He's a counterpuncher. He loves to do that. So how does he not look like a boring chump while waiting for you to move, right? How does he make like, I'm in a situation where my style of fighting requires you to throw

punches at me. How do I get that to happen? Well, I dance. I fucking mock you. I stand outside your range and I put my hands down. do you know this bullshit that's how i convince the judges and the audience that i'm not just standing here waiting for you to make mistakes i despised anderson silva throughout as long as i was a fan i've always hated anderson silva i've always thought i can't remember which fight it was but i just remember knowing that i had wasted money to pay for anderson silva to dance and i think i think i think it was the fight where dana even said it afterwards he's like that was horse shit that was damian maya maybe it was so bad and and that that like poisoned him in my mind and then you had chale out there like talking so much shit and

chale went out beat him five fucking rounds in a row and then lost. Oh, yeah. It happened in the fourth? I thought he went in the fifth. He won four rounds and lost in the fifth. That's why I argued he only won four. Chael likes to say he won all five. He lost in the fifth, so he didn't win that one. Okay, I follow.

Of course, of course, of course. Chael's like, this is the thing that's understanding. Well, he was winning the fifth. He's like, listen, I won four rounds. He won one. If I had any idea that had I tapped, I would have lost the fight. I wouldn't have done that.

There's just a misunderstanding in the rules. Chael just lays it out there. He was up four rounds. He was up four rounds. I'll tell you what. Y'all call that a fight? When I go in there

and I beat him up for five rounds in a row, the other guy wraps his legs around my neck for 30 seconds, and you say he's the winner? I don't think so. I'm the champion. And it's like, no, you just described how you lost. And then he buys a belt at the gift store in a casino and starts carrying it around like the champ.

Don't give a fuck. Dude, all right. So we had this substitute teacher when I was in middle school. casino and starts carrying it around like the chip don't give a fuck dude all right so when i we had this substitute teacher when i was in middle school this fucking loser he brought his wwe championship belt to show us because he thought it was cool and and look i wasn't the coolest 11-year-old in the school or anything, but I knew that this guy was a loser, and he would always be a loser, and that there were probably no one there who was even close to as much of a loser as this guy was

because he was trying to impress 12-year-olds with his belt he bought off the internet. And I still think back on that as perhaps the most pathetic lamest thing I've ever actually seen happen because he was like yeah and it was expensive

maybe $1200 or something to me at that age mind blowing money that is still mind blowing money for a WWE it was expensive whatever it was it was expensive is that the one from mind-blowing money that you that is still mind-blowing money for a wwe yeah it's huge whatever it was it was expensive is that the one from why are they so ugly though i don't understand every fighting belt i'm like gross like what are we doing here i remember being

cooler than that but uh maybe it wasn't but i do remember him bragging about it and all of us being like, you bought it? Like, yeah. Like, told us how much. That's a lot of money. We're more impressed that you acquired so much money. Kind of surprised you'd waste it on that, though. Have you seen the modern UFC belt? It's kind of neat to me.

I don't know if Zach can find a picture of the modern year sea belts but i like it a lot every time you beat someone you get like their flag on your belt like you've taken that country to you beat a nigerian you beat an american you beat the brazilian and before long you've got this like collection of uh i don't know trophies on your belt from other countries you've defeated there was a on the on the last fight night card there were two bad cuts and one of them in particular you could see um the artery you could see his artery um his his whole forehead area like right here is just blown up and you could see the don't show the wound i was afraid you were about to be so bad um but you can see like a bluish like blood artery thing that goes like north to south under this guy's fucking face because his face exploded from a knee and then um that asian guy

took a um an elbow to the eyebrow and it it cut his eyebrow in a way that is you could throw a cigar in the gaping wound gaping wound it wound. It looks like a pussy in the face. One of them won their fight, though. Those hurt so bad. Which one won the fight? Was it the black guy or the Asian guy? I forget. They both... Well, they were in different fights.

Right. Like separate events, but I believe they both lost to TKO because of the cuts. I think the fights got ended. I know the Asian guy, they ended that fight. They stopped that fight.

I think the black guy was a worse cut because he's the one you can see the blood the the artery or whatever it is it's probably wrong i was under the impression that some guy came back and won even with that cut maybe i'm wrong too i just i i didn't watch that fight i didn't want to watch it because i like i got i think i got to the second round the cut happens in the third on the asian guy and i was like wait what am I doing? I know what's coming. I don't want to see it. And I just turned it off.

I didn't watch the fight because I'd already seen the cut. And it's so bad. Cuts don't bother me a ton. The broken leg like Weidman had and created. Yeah. Like he was on both sides of that. That's rough. When they break their leg and then they like put their weight on it because they don't know it's broken yet.

And then it folds underneath them like Laffy Taffy. Connor almost did that. Did Connor's bend? He did. He put a step back and it went like that. And then he was like, oh, and he fell down. I've seen much worse bends. I think Weidman full on Laffy Taffy'd his fucking leg.

Anderson too, I think. Anderson's just bent anyway. If I remember, it was Laffy Taffy as they were putting it back in place to stand on. Real nasty break, like full-on break. Disgusting. And then they step on it, and seeing that... I've seen that in basketball too, but the worst I think that I've seen is when people are on that goddamn leg press machine and they get their fucking knees hyperextended and it folds them in half. Like every time I accidentally open one of those videos up, I pause it right before I have to see that again.

And it's like stuff like that keeps me off leg press machines. I have no interest in buying one. Shit ain't happening. It makes me so uncomfortable. Do you squat much? you do you do squats yeah i squat but like i'm not going heavy i've never put more than maybe 250 pounds on like i'm not interested in dancing around with a bunch of weight it's scary to me i squat later than that even at like 135 i back pain starts to creep in i do body weight squats lately maybe my where does it hurt your

back lower center uh okay i wear a belt um because i felt like my form wasn't good enough better with it okay and i i don't know if it is i wear a belt because i feel like it it keeps me from hurting myself even if i am like bad form i throw the mirror on the side so i can like i've recorded myself a lot to like try to go back and be like yeah and i of course use the titan uh squat bar um which kind of kind of rolls it back further down your back and kind of and then you've got the help the handles here that you can kind of roll it forward or back more because my problem is i work really hard to press out through like the center of my feet and my heels because my natural instinct is to press up through my balls of my feet. Yeah.

That implies a bad form. I don't know. I do them barefoot on a towel. I don't know. I saw somebody. It's not how I do it. Yeah, I watched some YouTube video. I don't know. So I do them bare'm not saying it's wrong. It's not how I do it. Yeah, I watched some YouTube video. I don't know.

So I do them barefoot. I do deadlifts barefoot too. And I don't know. It feels good to me. I don't know if it would feel better with shoes. I just do what the man on YouTube tells me to do. But yeah, I don't think you need to do them anyway. Your legs are huge.

Like what are you? We've already said this. You're so bad at RPG games that you've maxed out your leg skill and you're still fucking squatting over there. Diminishing returns. By now you should have gotten one of those headgear things to do neck exercises.

Like a big ass crazy neck. Stop the legs entirely. Literally stop. They're huge.'re huge they look i haven't missed a leg day well i miss it now because of the nose i'm not supposed to lift anything but after i broke my leg i never skipped leg day again i'm fucking wrapping lead on my cast and just doing leg day because i was trying to prevent the atrophy and yeah well see that's different that that that's that's a whole different thing having having one calf bigger than the other i don't know what they could do but i bet jogging would be weird like you might be you might hurt your back because your left calf is stronger than your

right calf it'll bounce back i went to the orthopedic surgeon yesterday for the leg yeah and um mixed news really like he's like all right here's what we got uh the soft tissue stuff coming back fine looks good your range of motion looks good your strength looks good your muscles look good it's cool still hurts a little bit but like minor and no more than it's supposed to so soft tissue cool the broken bone hasn't moved at all that implies to me that the thing is healing this fibrous tissue whatever but the x-ray this shit still looks broken he's like i was sort of hoping it would be like you'd see gray on the x-ray where it's filling in and mineralizing.

And he's like, not much. And I'm like, let me see. Show me the x-ray from four weeks ago. Dr. Woody's going to take a look at this thing himself. I have a trained eye. Maybe you're not looking carefully enough. So sure enough, we put the two next to each other and it's like fuck it if i didn't know what i'd say they were the same picture i didn't see any

time more more milk yeah so i asked him like down i put it specifically i'm like when can i start doing cool shit again like i want to ride my dirt bike i want to jump shit like i want to make bad decisions and uh he's like well there's two things we're looking for one these are your pt exercises when you do them pain-free that's a positive indicator and like four weeks more on this bone healing so that's kind of what we're looking at yeah do you ever you ever ask them i always ask my doctor this i'll be like okay okay are there any like experimental or dangerous options that like like let's say i had to go stop an asteroid from hitting earth this weekend and we needed to like knock this right out what will we do then like i always ask that i throw that hypothetical out there and

they'll be like well if it were an asteroid like yeah like six miles wide like a planet killer and i'm the guy we want to hit you up with some anti-inflammatories right away. And I'm like, yeah, yeah, let's get those coming. How much are those? Oh, like $65. Oh, no. I better take two then, huh? I like where your head is.

I'm not sure my doctor's cool enough for this line of questioning. Yeah, he might yuck it up and riff with you or anything. It won't be funny, but he might give you some better drugs. Yeah. I mean, he did stress that I take fish oil and vitamin d not calcium that's the one i would have guessed but those were the things that were important to him so i do but i didn't ask him like you did i wish i had you know yeah i bet i bet derek's probably got a doctor he's got all sorts of fucking like beakers bubbling away with something that your

bones would grow back you'd have negroid bones that's what that what that's no that's what it says on my chart i've got a when i when i get scanned when i get scanned they've got uh they got caucasian and negroid written at the top of the chart because because there's a different bone density standard for for for the two and uh and and my bone density standard for the two. And my bone density goes into the Negroid ranges. I'm very proud of that. It increased over time. It went up by a significant amount.

Tea increases your bone density, right? And you had tea. And it's racist to hear, but somehow not racist because it's factual but the normal t levels for black men are higher than white men which are higher still than asian men this is just average t levels if you look into this you'll see that that's true yeah and it's everything makes me feel racist but i'm like yeah that kind of tracks doesn't it are you shocked to hear that the ranking goes black white or asian is it if you just think of it as an athletic performance enhancer, maybe, is it even fair anymore?

Should we separate maybe? I'm not sure how you would do that, though. Keep them equal, of course. Make it fair. Separate but equal. Yeah. We're on to something. That's got a ring to it, right?

I've heard that before somewhere. Yeah, I mean, what could be more fair? I think what I'm looking forward to... Tucker pretending to have audio issues. What are you guys talking about? I think a lot of sports stars are on steroids. I think there's a ton of like design.

You're insane if you're not. You're insane. Literally, the the the the question of which steroid is better because, you know, there's there's limitations to what you're allowed. Actually, the real question is, like, here's what we are testing for. Do anything else with that and like you'll catch every now and then you'll hear somebody like oh i tested positive for this one thing and i was getting ringworm like uh steroids or what whatever and it's like no like when you when you're like right when you watch a thing that lowers your estrogen level so you don't get

man boobs. Yeah. That has nothing to do with ringworm. Yeah, and it's like, okay. When you listen to Derek talk about this, like, there are... It's not even like trying to find a needle in a haystack. It's like needing to find a needle in a haystack but thinking you were looking for a fucking cat.

It's like, they don't know what to look for with fucking cat it's like it's like you don't they don't know what to look for with some of these things these guys there's so much money involved that these that someone can get together in a laboratory and create a new chemical a new compound that nobody knows about and they'll be like look it's just you and fucking a rod and like four other people y'all know each other right like y'all are the people on compound j all right don't fuck this up and i mean yeah like i feel like that's just what happens oftentimes these designers super drugs are not the best ones like for sure not no if if they could take anything they'd take like tea and tremble on or something right something they get caught doing

that so they're taking the best drug that passes the test not the best drug yeah like part of the icarus thing um they were using um these mouth russians that's the russian doping stuff right yeah that's where they uncovered all the russian doping stuff one of the things they were doing so that the compound was in and out of their system, but still giving them tremendous effects, is they were using something called Oxandrolone, which has huge strength bonuses, healing stuff, and no real side effects.

Sounds like a perfect steroid, right? But it's pretty fucking detectable. But what they would do is they would have these mouth rinses of the stuff. They would gargle it and spit it out, and it's just sublingually in their bloodstream. They get some effects, obviously not as much as if you just popped a pill or swallowed

it, but they're getting effects that can't be caught, right? And they're becoming way stronger. They're healing way faster. They're just better. Yeah, you're just looking for 1%. It wasn't just Alexandra alone. I'm going to need 100%. I can't be competitive.

I'm going to need compound V. I don't know why you're not already on some juices and sauces, Woody. You're already like... I should be. I break every three weeks. Dude, you're already pretty fucking big. Look, i think you can get bigger but like there's there are genetic limitations to my understanding there's there are these like genetic caps on our rpg characters for how muscular

we can be we just all have different body types right you see some guys that are just skinny for life some guys that were just always just man he'll get fat if he fucks up for a minute like they're just people who are built different genetically. You're getting close to about as much muscle as you're genetically going to be able to hold. But a testosterone injection is just an override. You just hear that. And your body goes, oh, we need a lot more muscle. And somebody goes, how much?

Oh, love it. And they just pull the floodgates and then your fucking muscle fibers all have two hammers fucking doing crack cocaine and adderall and they're just making as much muscle fiber as they can making you extra fucking strong if you let's say you bench press for like 220 right now for 15 reps a month later so that's got sick eight weeks later you would add 30 pounds to that number and do it the same reps easy easy like that's conservative and if you really went hardcore you could make it 50 like no problem like not even hardcore like you just treated it seriously you'd put 50 if you'd like eight more i just want to be able to lift again

the that's the other thing you won't lose muscle if you don't lift now you can just take some time off and your body's like whoa he why did he build all that muscle we're we don't need all that and it's just like throwing it away like it's just shoveling it out the back it's it's waste product now but with some testosterone your body's like we'll be hanging on to that we'll be hanging on to that let's burn some fat because it feels like now like just as i approach like my prs like i hit one pr and like a stupid exercise i don't know tricep push downs but i was like sort of getting back after the broken leg and then the nose comes and i drop

i don't lift anything for two weeks you would hit all new prs work back again it would be it would be and it'd be interesting because like the way i did it as i started off is like untrained and low t and for you and for you to start off your t's probably okay or maybe even can't be that high i'm almost 50 but it can't be that bad you're like libido is fine and you're muscular right there's there's no way to like beat that with hard work ethic. That's genetics right there. It's hormones. You're okay, but if you were super physiological or bordering on it,

if you were capped out for what a man can and should be. Right, if it was back to 17-year-old levels. You'd explode so crazy fast. You'd be buying new equipment in in two months you'd be like i'm gonna burn right through this equipment the weights yeah you'd be like i'm gonna need more stuff i don't have enough i don't know i don't have enough shit to lift that sounds outrageous maybe dumbbells my heaviest dumbbells 65 yeah i could see no no i mean it's it's coming at some point you know at some point you're going

to want to like dial that in perfectly to be the the the ideal version of you spiritually and emotionally and all that stuff so like why not get a little head start on it see like i said my girlfriend's birthday is not for like a month and a half two months i'm buying the xbox tomorrow okay now i get to play xbox for an extra month and a half like not losing any points here genius get your xbox smart i don't know i can't wait till we get trt woody i can't wait it's fucking fucking uber woody i can't wait for it y'all i hope he doesn't tell any of us and we just see him start just fucking just get just bulk up like we just see him fucking getting those shirts like where are

those shirts getting smaller are you just getting bigger both you got a problem with that yeah i'm all raging they're all all the shirts are blue and tight suddenly i think uh the fucking tank tops the stringers are my cup of tea what what this is just what guys wear that's what i wear now starting fights at gas stations and shit no i never had any issue with that everybody always says that whenever i talk to someone who doesn't i don't know know much about it they think that steroids or trt in general i guess is going to make you more aggressive or a piece of shit really that's what they mean when they say aggressive is a piece of shit they don't mean that like i thought they meant short-tempered like i literally thought that yeah like but short tempered is a piece of shit to me as well like someone who's gonna yell at olive garden that's

a piece of shit okay it's breadsticks and salad dude chill out so but but but like if you're yelling at olive garden you're a piece of shit there's no call for that so i imagine some guy you know i think i've talked to people about him like oh don't people like that go into roid rages and i'm just like i think before the roid rages they were already going into regular rages yeah so exacerbates some people underlying yeah yeah it makes some other ragers into scarier people. Derek's videos always make Trenbolone seem like insane.

Guys turn gay. Guys turn aggressive. Guys turn weird psychologically. You ever put on so much mass you wanted to suck a cock? Try Trenbolone, bitch!'s like no really stories he tells yeah i don't get that one that one's weird making the dudes gay or whatever i have heard about it like really blowing their hormones out of make them

crazy making people like crazy crazy so like that but that libidos goes so wild like gay is like a thing and they're just like oh my god i totally wanted to fuck this fat woman on a bus. My understanding of Trenbolone as a compound, I've watched a lot of those YouTube videos. Maybe I'm getting things mixed up here. But it is that it was never meant for humans. That it is a horse steroid that... And the only way people are getting it is... One of the ways is by taking the pellets that they normally inject into horses,

these time-released horse steroid pellets, and like, I don't know, doing something to them to make an injectable compound that they are then injecting into themselves via, you know, a fucking syringe. Maybe also, like, people are just good enough chemists that they don't need that pellet to begin with, and they're it up i don't know but that's where it came from i'm almost positive i think it's a fucking horse steroid not only that hey one that's meant to be like a time released let's not get crazy that's what they said about ketamine and you know that's

now what he's on it you know do you know this about what he what he's on what he's going uh what he's on the ketamine now yeah nice what he's like uh going on like fucking weekend bang trips on his new motorcycle he's just like clutching the blanket for 40 minutes at a time dude k-hole's a pretty good i i've tried a couple drugs now k K-hole's got to be my favorite. You are, that is a very interesting, that is a very interesting take because it is very much a hit or miss for almost everybody that does it. I didn't expect to hear that.

What would be people's negative experience? I think that the vast majority of people who recreationally try ketamine, the only people that take ketamine regularly don't have a problem with being in a k-hole sometimes because that's just the natural progression of that drug um the people that accidentally try ketamine or do ketamine or end up in a k-hole stop doing ketamine they that is the it's like being in sleep paralysis prison like why it's like to me

yeah by the way what we mean by k-hole is like a bad experience where you're like having no when you're paid out when you're caved out and you're just like you're you're we're not talking you're feeling wiggly or like you're incapable of functioning as a human because you're sitting there maybe you want that lost it's like uh yeah if you haven't had a pretty fun i'm not gonna say lost but like you're uh it's just it's like i don't know just the uh i in my head i a lot of times run into people who are you know in the midst of their ketamine journey at a you know warehouse party at a club or someplace like that and they are in the corner that they like yeah they just prescribe it i was blown away when it was like so i ordered some

ketamine last week and got fucked wait what where are these people like you said at a warehouse party and that was the part that like here's my ketamine experience i'm in a bed it's a happy place i've got my scented candles going i've got the binaural music it just goes clickety click you probably like it and uh um uh usually there's some like motivational thought-provoking speech during the first seven minutes you're most right sort of entering the k-hole part and i have a weighted blanket on me and then i just like go for the ride how much ketamine are you taking i 400 i think is it are we 400 grams yeah i could look at it it's in the i mean 400 i mean 400 milligrams so 0.4 grams i guess so yeah i mean i mean like i i mean is that a little bit to you or

i don't you know i'm gonna be honest the only time i've ever seen ketamine it was not weighed in anything specific outside of what's in the bag but like i mean yeah like you're using it the way that people are prescribing it in a medical situation that has a lot of positives, but just like, you know, you, you're doing it that way. It's like saying like, you can take some shrooms and have a positive effect, but if you do, there is a amount of shrooms you will take where you are lost in the sauce. And that is the same with ketamine. You may not be taking enough to get there, or maybe you are, and your experience is very nice. And there are some people that love it as well.

I'm not trying to say that you're weird. The K-hole you described where you're like incapable of fun. I'm like this with my hands like crisscrossed on my chest and the weighted blanket. And I feel like I'm flying in clouds. And I just go with it. Like everything is happy. And I remind myself that like she's the difference between yeah like your marriage is good you have no debt everything

is fine let's sort out like you know like these are the thoughts yeah that's why you know and it's like all right i'm on a slippery well lubricated ride i said i was going to do it but uh i just drug my feet i Google, and there's a place that does the drips near me, but I want to be able to administer. I want to be at home. I don't want to go somewhere and do an IV thing. I want to be at home in a comfortable

chair watching, I don't know, Nightmare on Elm Street or something and get going. Oh, Mandy. Dude, I wish I could get you the audio track I listened to. It would be boring, I think, without the cat. I think it's Guns N' Roses. But the opening speech that comes to it,

about how people use their time effectively and what the meaning of life is, just sets the rest of the K-hole in the right direction. That just seems a little heavier than i want to like get into it tuesday night it is a it is a uh i i don't know i think just like everything you can administer a little bit or a lot and i think ketamine to me is a lot like you know you can have a a light marijuana experience or you can do dabs and ketamine turns to dabs very quickly and uh you have to really take care

like woody is to set up a good environment i also don't like the drug so i'm not a good person but i have a lot of friends that recreationally have like uh yeah love it it's my favorite love that but like yeah but like yeah so but like understanding that ketamine is a whole different beast. So it's, I mean, but it's also very proven to be good. Dude, it's so difficult to describe the effects of drugs. Like you're like, oh, I like it. I like acid, but ketamine is a whole different beast. And if I'm listening, I'm like, what's it like?

You know, to me, I'm in a happy place. I feel really like there's some joy involved i feel like none of my thoughts are encumbered by second guessing that they're all great ideas could you enjoy this drug when you're not alone though because because that's what i want i want a drug that i can i can have fun whether i'm alone or not and and with acid it it's like, I'm so giggly that like, it's that, it's that, it's that laughter that feels really good when like,

when it's like inappropriate to laugh, like at a funeral or in court or something, but you've got that like giggly laugh, like that it's that like, you're already on the verge of cracking up. So that all somebody has to do is like make a silly face or like remind you of a thing. Or they'll often be like a running joke when you got a bunch of guys hanging out or something and then

they'll just be like at least he didn't shit his pants and then you'll just like lose your shit and like like actually just start laughing so hard i that's my favorite part about acid was that was my mushroom experience i've told the story so many times one of my friends brought a lousy camp chair by the campfire and we just couldn't get over it it was this tall it was it was eight inches tall and and like you know six by six inches to sit on and we just mocked that chair for being inferior to ours all night long everyone had a blast about it sober us would not have found it that funny no but like you said it's that just such a good time everyone was enjoying each other's company. That was my mushroom experience.

My ketamine experience is more of a solitary journey of joy and introspection in a positive way. Okay. That sounds interesting, but not what I like. I really like something that's – I love acid. Just being so giggly. And I like seeing something. Everybody just always made – like Cartoons made marijuana and alcohol always seem like you're going to see pink

elephants and shit. And every time I would do one of these things, I'd be so underwhelmed until I took a whole bunch of acid and I actually saw some shit wiggle. And you're like, wow, it's like a cartoon. Even then, it's not like a cartoon. It's just like, alright.

That is dead, but now it's weak like all right like all right that is dead now it's not underwhelm you you will absolutely feel like waves of motion and pulsation and like you're flying on a magic carpet for you and it won't disappoint carry on have you considered doing a sensory deprivation tank in conjunction oh my my God. In conjunction. I'm a little scared to mix them, but I hear you. I want to, I want to do. So I think I watched a YouTube video about the guy who invented acid and that's what he was doing. He was taking huge doses and going into a sensory deprivation tank. Um, I wanted to go, go there last time I was in, um, out there with the Taylor, the Superbowl party. When I was a Taylor, I was like, dude, let's just take a bunch of edibles and get in there.

And he was just completely against it. And so we never went. Nobody wanted to do it with me. But like, I would love to do that. They're cheap. Like it's it's it's I don't know, $50 or something like that for an hour. I'd want to be in there for at least an hour. But you just completely floating.

No in that saltwater, completely blacked out with the earmuffs on i'm sure you could throw some music in if you wanted to and just go that would be wild a ketamine trip is about an hour long and then after that it's it's toned down a ton and i find that to be the right length so it's not like you want to drive after an hour yeah there's a great hour and then an hour of like i should hold the handrail when i go down the stairs yeah acid is definitely one where you're like you're buckling in for the rest of tonight all and and and that means till morning like this is 12 hours that we're not going to be right uh uh and and then we're going to go to sleep after

that so we're all done with our day. Oh, you need to go somewhere? No, no, not anymore. Everything delivered. And you're hoping nobody asks you a serious question. You might want to turn your phone off. But it's a really good time. It's a really good time. We should wrap.

Tucker, anything you want to pimp? You know, continue. If you guys like music, check out my record label Night Mode. We just got some music in Counter-St, uh, it's been going really well. So still doing that. Oh, that's cool. All right. PKA 614.