Painkiller Already - PKA 632 w/Drift0r: WW3 Predictions, Kyle Falls Downstairs, Drift0r Cured

Episode Date: January 28, 2023

P.K.A. 632 with our guest Drifter Taylor. This episode of P.K.A. brought to you by Lock and Load and RealDBG.com. That's death by gummy bears now under RealDBG.com. Get yourself some very powerful, powerful gummies. Get fucked up. Drifter, how are you? Are you? You're clearly not well.

We're doing another bed cast. It's not looking good. It's been a wild ride. So I've got good news. I finally found out what's wrong with me. I was actually not crazy. I cannot believe that, shockingly. That's good.

I have a pretty severe lifelong vitamin B1 deficiency, better known as thiamine. And you need that vitamin to regulate most of your organs, your nervous system, your heart, your brain, muscle growth, bone density, a lot of the not so essential things in your body. And probably had it my whole life. Most of the weird problems I've had, including the hallucinations that you guys find so amusing, were almost certainly driven by vitamin B1. Yeah. Two things. One, that's definitely amusing. We stand by that. Two, how many times now have you finally

forgotten to the bottom of this problem? Is this root cause number four, seven? I think it would be the third, but I think it's the really real one because this destroys testosterone and other things and destroy it. It causes your nervous system to essentially disintegrate because the myelin sheaths that protect the nerves do disintegrate. They don't repair demyelinization, causes people to lose their memory. It causes people to slur words. Balance problems has a tendency to cause heart and upset stomach. blood flow that's

what causes a wet brain did you know that yeah yeah people who are like chronic alcoholics like they get wet brain like late in life shout out lady die from the ona show she got you supposed to have dry brain yes because wet brain it means that you have a severe thiamine deficiency and you lose your mind like you no longer are with reality you're like you're in fantasy world and that's apparently caused by a thiamine deficiency so it seems like how the fuck did they not catch this or did you not happen upon like a pair uh the short version is this is something that really is almost never checked for at least in the western world it's considered eliminated since most of our food

is fortified with high uh thiamin mononitrate. So in theory, if you eat one Pop-Tart a week, you should have enough. I have discovered that I am so lucky to have a genetic disorder that causes my body to not absorb very much. So lucky, in fact, it's a new gene that hasn't been researched yet. So it didn't show on the initial test. Do you get to name it? And I think the doctor does. I know this because I reached out to my family. Drifter with a zero.

Yeah. I would keep it with an E. It's easier to spell. But I got my family members to also take vitamin supplements and a variety of issues that they had from cold sensitivity to anxiety to uh issues with psychosis and things like that went away very quickly so yes so genetic how much history of psychosis are we talking here in the family uh are we talking about like an uncle who liked to talk about gremlins and his fighter plane back in nam are we talking about like pants on your head, got a kitchen knife and we're heading out? My grandfather has a body count of about 15 people because he got violent when he got drunk and he would have breaks from reality. Body count doesn't mean that anymore.

Well, you're right. You fucked a lot of guys. I try not to talk too much trash. My mother would go psychotic when she would drink. I saw her break a plate and try to cut her face off with the edges to let the demons out or God knows what. So that's been in the family for a long time. I'm not going to talk about my other relatives because I doubt they want to be on this show. But similar issues when mixed with alcohol.

And the only reason it didn't get me is because I grew up around alcoholics and swore that off. I'm on the cannabis only train. If I had oh my god it'd have been terrible so for your family it's like doubling up with the alcohol because you already have a thiamin problem and then that that's not good and i want a straight edge my friend uh i don't know about it tylenol twice like like oh man so your life sounds so scary to me. In my normal life, I don't deal with any sort of ghouls or goblins or anything like that. That's a daily concern for you. You're like, fingers crossed there's no ghouls or goblins today.

I don't particularly worry about those anymore. I used to. Just on a daily basis. I was seeing things. I used to. Okay. Just on a daily basis. I was seeing things. It's weird. Yeah. Right now, I just worry about managing the health stuff. The good news is I'm supposed to make a full recovery. The bad news is it's supposed to take a couple of years because it's been going for so long. Every system in my body is dysregulated. That's why the testosterone was so low for no reason. And all these other things and all the labs are all out of whack. And I got lucky.

I got in touch with one of the very few doctors on the planet that even has published research on this. Dr. Chandler Mars. She runs hormones matter dot com. And she's been helping me. And her name is basically Chandler Mars. Yes. So what's this? We're going to gloss right over the lady's

name's chandler i mean that's more interested than any of this okay the solution is it just a vitamin uh for the most part yeah take vitamin b1 it's very cheap it's over the counter uh it made me feel better within 12 hours i felt radically better within a week unfortunately after a month, I kind of plateaued. I talked to this new doctor and she said average recovery time is a couple of years because your body's kind of in starvation mode. So I got a lot of fun stuff to work through, but the long term is looking pretty good. That's good. I'm glad it seems like you have a prognosis or whatever to go off of. Does it piss you off at all that after all

of this, it seems like a vitamin deficiency that could have been handled on Amazon? Are you fucking kidding me? You didn't take a multivitamin? I did take a multivitamin, but it didn't have thiamine in there.

Since it's already in our bread, the majority of multivitamins don't include it because it's considered the majority of multivitamins don't include it because it's considered unnecessary. Which multivitamin? Oh, shit. It was just like some chewable gummies I got from Target. Okay, see, that's the problem. Anybody out there that, look,

I take multivitamins every day. I think it's one of the five things you should take. If you had to pick five, it'd be in them. And I take those expensive-ass Thorne multivitamitamins and i promise you you take four pills a day or something you take you take them in the morning there's a morning blend and an evening blend well kyle's on the rich guy thorn stack i'm on the basic nutrition stack well i mean i'm sure that there's thiamin in it like you said there's thiamin in pop tarts like like i had a like does your diet um you know everybody eats

differently i know some people just never touch like vegetables or fruits ever like like was that a thing like no i know i eat very healthy no caffeine no alcohol no tea not a lot i do eat sweets but not a tremendous amount you know try to eat organic local healthy vegetables blah blah blah i you know i'm in texas it's not vegetables, blah, blah, blah. I, you know, I'm in Texas. It's not going to be perfect here, but it's pretty damn good. Yeah. Yeah. I wasn't even looking.

I'm just thinking like you've developed this, this crazy thiamine deficiency where it's seemingly, but it's been my whole life. It's like, how did you avoid thiamine so much? And the answer is clearly that you didn't, that you've got this genetic disorder that makes you need a lot of thiamine. I need a lot. And I got lucky. My life was a perfect series of events. Every medication that I've ever taken for a long time, a lot of the procedures that I've had done, all of those have known side effects of draining thiamine. I've taken sertaline. I've been on

diuretics when I was a teenager. I used to have to get bi-monthly spinal taps and things like that. when I was a teenager. I used to have to get bi-monthly spinal taps and things like that. So all of those things drain thiamine. And there's only two labs in the entire world that'll give you a transketolase test, which is the most accurate one. So doctors almost never test for it. And I only found this because I went to a psychiatrist because I was like, that's it, I'm done. I'm crazy. Put me in a padded room and lock me up. This makes no sense. The psychiatrist said, look, man, you can be as crazy as you want

and not get labs like this. You may have a mental problem, but there may be something else. He sent me to a neurologist and the neurologist is like, well, I don't know what's wrong with you. I just know that it's going to be weird and it's going to be beyond my expertise. I'm going to refer you to like the research hospital, which was UT Southwestern. And it'll take four months, but you know what? I'm going to sign you up for like 15 shotgun random tests to do a little work before you get there. One of them, B1, the trans keto lace and so i'm just fighting my way through that it's going to

be a fun year-long slog uh but at least apparently i often have you thought about killing yourself because i gotta tell you if i had all these problems especially with the mental stuff going on you know something you can't wrap your hands around or cut out because like if you got cancer like like if i had like i don't know if there's an example of a cancer that men can get like when women get breast cancer they can make that nuclear option and be like you know what take them fucking both well ma'am that the right one's still good no fuck this shit like and i have a lot of respect when that when they do that i don't know if there's a nuclear option for men like that but that's what i'd be looking for i'd be looking for the bad part of me to cut out at

some point you know like i don't know if you've ever gotten a thorn in in your foot or something and you feel like i don't care how much this hurts or how gross is to dig around my foot you're coming out there's something like in us that wants us to get that shit out of us that doesn't belong and so like man i could see thinking killing myself like well like some of the stuff you've been through you are goddamn determined to start us off grim today but the honest truth is I try not to lie. You're in a coffin. Am I bringing the mood down? This is a very expensive bed.

Anyway. I bet it is. It comes with that oak lid. You got the inlay and the silver handles on the side. Yeah. The whole anyway. It's a it's a it's a floating bed that glows it's a cyber bed it looks really cool anyway um yes i thought about killing myself i'm not not a lot but the thought of

not seriously i didn't sit here and be like yeah i'm gonna do it today none of that but every now and then when i was trying to go to sleep and in a lot of pain i imagined how pain-free it would be to be dead and imagining being dead helped me go to sleep so i'm lot of pain i imagined how pain-free it would be to be dead and imagining being dead helped me go to sleep so i'm really sorry man that's that's horrible it's horrible you have to deal with this and i'm genuinely happy for you that it seems like you're optimistic on on the path you're on now hopefully you're doing a good job so that's rough what you got you know yeah it must feel really good to have your hands around like I said like at least have a really good

idea of like what what the thing is like like and it's and it's easily solved to they're not like oh we found it it's your butthole we have to remove your butthole we have to core out your butthole we're making a do I just get an even better butthole

like you can't remove a hole. You can only make holes bigger. You can get the colonoscopy bag. You know, the one on your side. I don't see why you'd have to do that. Nowadays, you can just request a corpse anus. Is that true? I got a real thing.

I want a zombie anus. I think that'd be disgusting. Just a greenish anus that's slowly rotting. What's the difference between a zombie anus and a regular cadaver anus? That it's been affected with that virus? Well, yeah, one of them would be animated. I'm kind of imagining a cornhole

with an anus of the dead. It's a prehensile like lips. How does I know that our intestines like force poo out of us Or whatever and I think maybe there's even some That's my understanding Is that how they do it?

I'm asking I know our intestines I think a contraction squeezes like a tube If I'm not mistaken Musculature is intestine muscle A little bit They do move I'm not a doctor. Those are the villi. Those are what

absorb things. No, I have a genuine like... I just thought... It's called peristalis, right? Yeah, it's it is muscular. The involuntary constriction and relaxation of the muscles in the intestine creating lead-like movements that push the contents of the canal forward. Peristalis. Cool. Okay.

Okay, thank you. Yeah. I wasn't sure about that because I know that people eat intestine in a number of different ways. Mostly pig intestines. Chitlins. Yum yum. And then the casings on all the best hot dogs. If you've ever eaten a hot dog that had a crunch, that was intestine that you just

bit right into. That was the casing. And that's a good use. That does make it better. And condoms. Let's never forget that they make... Sheepskin condoms? Sheepskin. They don't stretch and therefore are not accommodating for all users.

They are... In 1942, that's all you had. Do you ever see that next to the other condoms just walking by at the store? And you think, like what who's using sheep's intestine why i wanted to see like is this a superior condom is the gross factor all that's keeping me away from a superior condom experience i had that thought and i got it and literally there's no stretchiness to it really like you know at the base of a condom like there's

less stretchiness to it i've also tried like yeah you know you grab the base of the condom and like like you know you pop it over and then roll it down. I'm not going to give a whole... I'm going to give a pants on. We've all worn pants. Not all of us! Not all men have penises, Taylor. You said you tried this.

Did you try this, just get hard and slip it on? Or is it like, hey baby, I've got this new condom. It's going to rock your world. No, this was just for test run this was okay yeah yeah you never want to break something out for the first time with a with an audience right you do you test your material first to the mirror no totally like a small a small group and then you work your way up to the stadium i start with a focus group heart mode yeah and that's what you do and then you anyway early it's gross anyway like like without making a my

dick so big thing um like like they're not accommodating for like most the average penis i would say like they're they're really small at the base like i don't know who they're made for maybe like scottsman for those i don't know um but but i found it to be far too small for not just me but like any normal man trying to fix. So not good for the girthier listeners here. Correct. And not good for people who like are not allergic to latex. Like there's a better solution

than animal intestine. Absolutely. Imagine being like a teenager or something and you're about to get laid for the first time and maybe you've never been to the hospital or been sick and you don't know that you're allergic to latex and and you slide that thing on, you probably would. I don't know how long that takes, but I imagine the next day would be all sorts of hell.

It'd be horrible, because if you were a teenager losing your virginity, you'd be too into it to even realize. It'd be like the next morning in the shower, like, the water! It's burning my dick! And my dick's all red and lumpy. What's wrong with it? Latex. We have someone in our hangout who was in a real tight latex. It's not a gimp suit unless it has a mask, is it, Kyle? Was that a...

You know, I... I wouldn't call that a gimp suit. It was more of like a futuristic techno kind of eon flux thing or something. I don't know, but he was... It was pretty Tron-ish. It was like of like a futuristic techno kind of eon flux thing or something. I don't know. But he was... He was pretty Tron-ish. He was in there real good.

Yeah. He was a cyberpunk sex slave kind of thing going on. All right. All right. Tell me more. I'm listening. He looks like a guy who like... He looks like a guy who gets in.

Yeah. Which sounds awesome. And I don't mean the way you're thinking. I mean, he like puts lube everywhere. Like, he's got to get in there. Yeah. He says he puts it on his arms, his legs, and you have to just slip the whole thing on.

Well, that would make sense. I mean, imagine your skin sticking to leather at that degree of pressure and how impossible it would be to get out. They'd have to cut you out of those things. Yeah, it sounds terrible. I mean, but he did, dressed up like that, he looked like a gay man who came from the future

to teach new sex tricks to people in the past like he to fight crime to fight crime and have gay sex he's got guns the perfect hero for 2023 i'm literally imagining a gay robocop in bondage now yeah and that's he would appreciate that description yeah he's a cool guy he's a cool guy and it really it made me self-conscious that it's like there's no amount of lube that i could have put on to fit in something like that i would look can you imagine how bad the average person would look in a latex suit like there would be there'd no there'd be if i had to wear a wetsuit in front of people right now i'd pretend to come on the water's not that cold guys i'll be fine it. Taylor. It's like, it's like jumping.

I mean, you guys ever been out of shape and like jumped in the pool with your shirt on thinking you're going to fool people. And it just like shrinks down. And it's like, no, I'm still out of shape. And everybody knows it would be like, the Mexican laborer trick.

Yeah. Where you, where you jump in with your t-shirt on. No, I, that only draws more attention to your overweightness. I've never been the level of fat where I had to wear a t-shirt in the pool. But I've also never been the level of fit that I could put on a wetsuit without love handles being a fucking issue.

And you just look so fat and bad. And I bet your thighs would jiggle just in a bad way, though. Why don't they make more flattering wetsuits i bet they could like like i think there's a market there i bet there's a whole bunch of people who have money who would love to get into scuba or whatever you wear wetsuits for and uh and they don't do it because there aren't flattering scuba suits yeah they need to be maybe a baggy wetsuit yeah a little little little fringe what like gene that's counterintuitive to have a baggy wet exactly like gene cos yeah but i mean you just

have to weather out like or meter out like what do you prefer safety or like not being mocked yeah i like to look good while i dive underwater i'm gonna be the sexiest bitch in this cave i'm gonna be down there taking photos of crabs and i'm going to come back up and people are going to be laughing because they took a picture of my fat fucking love handles enjoying the crabs and it's going to ruin my whole day. I'm going to go, man, well now you get a dark one with some stripes and contours like, you know,

like vertical stripes or make me depressed. Thinks you're in trouble. I'd have to do that thing I do sometimes at all-inclusive resorts where I like, I I eat two hot dogs at one buffet and then I leave and go to a different one so they don't see me eat four at the same buffet.

The buffet is unlimited. You just are too ashamed to eat all those hot dogs. I don't know if that's the lowest level though because once you give up on the shame then that's probably a lower level when you just order all. You're like, you know what?

The four was a lie anyway. Give me six. The whole thing was a lie. I've actually been going to three vendors. Just give me all six. It's like ordering a pizza, and I'm like, and garlic knots and a large, what else does everybody want? Give me a lava cake.

I turn on music and disco lights when i answer the door if food didn't make you fat i would eat the most ridiculous diet do you know how many wendy's i've driven by and not bought french fries from i want them i always want them i constantly crave more french fries i would do to every mcdonald's every wendy's every chick-fil-a i i would be eating constantly my car would have just snacks and shit all over the place i this is the world i want to live in where you could like control your calorie burning rate so you could just be like like all right i'm on 5 000 calories a day for life. And then just go. It would hurt to touch me. He said you'd still smell

like Wendy's. Yeah, because you'd have to burn it all out. It would just... All the Wendy's would come out of your pores. You'd go give your wife a hug and be like, oh my God, you smell like Wendy's fries. I want to lick the salt off your face. Woody, why do you smell like Wendy's in a vanilla candle? It's just my scent.

That's all I do now. Just over eat that. That'd be great. What's your favorite kind of fry then? I think McDonald's takes the cake as far as fast food. Definitely. I'm not on that team and the reason is that their fries are cut so thin they get cold quickly and

my McDonald's fry experience usually involves cold fries. Don't like it. It's never been a problem i've been alpha i'm i'm done with usually unironically i'm half done with my mcdonald's meal by the time i'm about to turn back onto the road you've got the whole oh my mouth burns but better too hot than too cold I prefer a heartier fry I don't like the standard fast food fry So Arby's curly fries have always been a favorite

Especially the ones that are like those little They're like a cylinder They're so tightly wound A little bit of spice on there And they're seasoned But my favorite fry is probably the Zaxby's french fry those of you who aren't in the south don't know but it's a it's like a crinkle fry it's a crinkle cut french fry and then they like hit it with some paprika seasoning salt shit and it tastes good and it's a hearty fry that has like potatoey fluff inside

whereas mcdonald's fries are mostly just a crunchy exterior with nothing inside oh yeah mcdonald's fries are like those fried chips you buy at the Asian supermarket that are super crunchy. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. And they go good with the Zach sauce, too. I've always been an In-N-Out fangirl myself. Like, I do love their fries. But the best fries are the big, fat, thick, like, wedge fries you get at a restaurant somewhere. It's just no fast food makes those.

Yeah, I like hearty fries. I want it to be a piece of potato, I guess, more than like I want it to be closer to a baked potato than a potato chip. How about this? Are there any fries that you don't like? Because every kind you just named, I'm like, oh, I'm down? Yeah. Chick-fil-A has those. Good call.

Their fries suck. Chick-fil-A is so good at everything, but then they break out those waffle fries, and they get like seasoning being rationed and gross and uh and i don't know they're just not overall a well-seasoned or tasty fry yeah the seasoning is a huge letdown it's like salts being rationed there's not a good seasoning on their fries and if i'm eating it's a real white person fry i don person fry clearly not we're white and I need some salt wider than us

like an Irish person there's a number of white people that just don't eat spice or flavor they'll just put the chicken in there with no seasoning and just bake it and it'll come out solid white I've never seen somebody do that he hates people with like tans them out solid white. I've never seen somebody do that.

He hates people with like tans. You skin-dark skinned cocksucker! Those Southern Irish! Fuck them! Y'all ever have your grandparents get mad at Italians? Like your grandparents like, I don't want my granddaughter associating with that dark

skinned Italian. He's so Greek. Whatever. Those are crazy people. You know, you look at them. You see, that's it. Like, I mean, come on. Look at Taylor.

Look at him. You see it. That is. The. You're going to go greasy and. That was a good one. My mother's coloring is pretty much a mirror of kyle's and when my father brought her home my grandmother said she's a little bit swarthy wow oh that's an ancient word i love it

or greek yeah greek and italians i would imagine they're the ones being called swarthy maybe like turks turks greeks italians i picture them getting hit with the swarthy remark the most but i haven't heard swarthy from someone under the age of 80 ever i've only ever read it in like older literature pirates or something oliver twist the swiss family robinson or something exactly like like something written turn of the century like the other one oh i wanted to talk about um if it's okay i first of all glad that you worked out that that that whole thing i think about you every now and then i have a friend or a loved one who's got a a health concern or whatever i'm like look it's not that bad we'll get this cleared up

no there's this guy named drifter on the Internet. I know. Let me. You know about the hat, man? They'll be like, no. I'm like, and you never want to know. So fucking stiff upper lip. It's just leukemia, pussy. Like, you can be Drifter and they'll right away. It perks them up.

But no, seriously, I'm glad you're not like fucking fighting ghosts or like, you know, you were on that Dan Aykroyd path there for a while. I thought it was getting scary. I was never unaware of that like just so you guys know i never like believed that was reality i just couldn't unchange the way or change the way i was perceiving things i was just getting fucked at like the mitochondrial level i i kind of get that in like i have had dreams where i wake up and i'm like mad at jackie in real life knowing that it's irrational and it's not okay and that i need to not project that keep it inside until you come to your senses yeah but i still feel mad like yeah the emotion is the same even though i know the

cause is a lie i can usually knock that out with a shower i've like i've yeah i know exactly what you're talking about and like like sometimes i'll just be in a bitchy ass mood like like sometimes and i can feel it and i've i'll warn people in my life i'll be like look what you just said there was nothing wrong with it you're just having a conversation but i can tell that i i feel like a piece of shit today and i almost went off on you just then for no reason just because i want to fight and i want to be mean so we shouldn't talk give me a little space for a couple hours, because I'm a real bitch right now. You don't want to deal with me. You can't tinker us. I can feel it.

I'm feeling mean and angry and bitter about some nonsense, and I'm like, shit, there's a mean guy inside me who wants to lash out. I better tell my loved ones to keep their distance from hurting somebody's fucking feelings, or vice versa. Something bad's going to happen. I like the way you handle it. I'm grumpy let me finish my breakfast watch some

youtube videos and circle back to you at 10 30 yeah like really mature honestly well i can like tell that i'm gonna be a piece of shit like like and i know that it's not like really me it's just like how i'm feeling right then and i'm just in a bad stance i'm coming from a bad place yeah um and it's never anything that serious it could be it could be a compounding thing like i have a bad dream i'll have a sad dream and i'll wake up all bummed out and then like oh let me talk i told taylor right before the show here's my morning i get up around six or seven a.m and i take my dogs out it's been like that for a couple months now. I'm on this sort of sleeping from 11pm till 6 or 7am. I'm on that sleep schedule. No naps or anything.

Hush. I'm talking about you. Stop. Don't fucking bark. So I get up and I take the dogs out and I make my fucking delicious coffee. I'm really good at making coffee. I got my milk all frothed up and my special coffee beans that i grind myself i don't pick her up she'll bark and uh so i'm heading up my stairs back up here to my office i'm gonna watch some youtube shorts smoke a little and uh and drink my morning coffee and uh check in to check on my tarkov traders because that's what i like to do in the morning. Check the market.

I make it to step 12. That's when I step in the dog vomit that I didn't know was there because it was dark. My left foot comes out from under me. My hip hits that 12th step. Because I'm a man, I prioritize not spilling that coffee. I'm like, we're saving this drink. And so I went down a dozen steps screaming no on my ankle, my hip, and my elbow going, no, no, no, no, no. And every bump, I'm like splashing the wall with more and more hot coffee. If I had just thrown it in the air on the first, at the beginning of the fall, it would

have been better. Right? I'd have made less of a mess. So not only am I at the bottom in a heat, in a lot of pain, but I'm covered in coffee. And dog vomit. And dog vomit. And the whole staircase is, too.

And the wall. And that was the beginning of the day. Yeah. At least it's coffee, so not something that stains horribly. My mind's like auto-completing his story. And he says, because I'm a man, and I'm like, you told your bitch to clean up the vomit, right? That's the auto-complete on this sentence. Went and yelled at his dog.

I would say that if you've got a good partner, after they see you fall down a dozen stairs, they're already cleaning it up. They're already cleaning it up because they know you just went down a dozen fucking steps. Because they know what happens if they don't. The implications there. Conor McGregor knows it better than anyone. There's some lady... Not better than Dana White. There's a controversy there. Well, look, Dana White will slap a bitch.

Conor McGregor will beat her ass and toss her off his yacht and then deny the charges um she's she's kept saved by the red cross or like the coast guard or something she decided it was safer to try to swim to shore wait what he threw a woman off a yacht and then she actually jumped for safety she says she said that he was beating her or molesting or whatever and then she like jumped overboard to to get safety. That's her story. I read this story. It sounded like she jumped

overboard to avoid rape. Yeah, that's the general vibe I got, too. Yeah. Well, what time of day was it? He said, good news, guys. I might be going up, coasting the ultimate fighter this season. Can you believe it? And we all got real excited because it'd be great to have on the show again.

And, uh, and nobody else said shit else. Oh, well, it seems to pan out in his world. Because this isn't the first time that someone has made an accusation like this,

like this. And we know he lives like a, a wild ass lifestyle with like women and drugs and yachts. So shit, he probably did it right. Like, like, I mean,

or maybe not. I mean's the man's like a quarter billionaire or whatever the fuck he is and i've never been invited and i'm sure he doesn't have like the highest quality people in general let's not even just pick out women i bet his friends in general are kind of shitty people and uh yeah exactly there you go have you guys noticed that there's been a lot of accusations lately? Like a lot of very popular people get, you got Andrew Tate, you got Justin Roiland, you got Andrew Callahan, now Conor McGregor.

And it's just, it's been busy lately. Justin Roiland stuff is particularly nasty. If you've seen it, he's been texting minors and yeah, the district say that again can i i'm sorry to interrupt but i i want to hear what you have to say with this the charges are like false imprisonment and something else that implies like domestic abuse right domestic abuse and the it was false imprisonment by intimidation coercion or other methods so basically if you try to leave, I'll beat you.

And she was afraid and she stayed. Okay. Now you said something about texting minors. I hadn't heard that. So if you Google Justin Roiland minors, you will find some Reddit threads and Twitter threads where a variety of people claiming, now this is not like scientifically police backed up or whatever, claim that Justin Roiland was texting them when they were teenagers ranging from 15 to 16, I think. And I read some of the messages and one of them was something like, I'm drunk and horny in Atlanta. Holy shit, why are you such jailbait? Can't wait for you to grow up or something to that general extent uh even today there was somebody who worked at squanch tendo games that said that justin roiland

was not allowed to be involved in the writing process uh at wb studios because of his sexual harassment against some of the staff there so oh my god you're so beautiful why are you such jailbait i can't wait for you to grow up these are the words of a gentleman this is a man who is waiting for the team those are the words of a creepy guy who would have been old like older than me and some of us at the same time and there was more people putting stuff out there so it's just stuff is spiraling out of control see i don't like that stuff because like you just said, I read a comment on Reddit.

Someone said that they're a little girl. It's not proven. I saw this little girl on Reddit told me all about it. She texts Justin and he talks dirty to her. You know what I mean? That aside, I want to see more about what he did to his spouse or whomever this whole thing's about. I always want details. I want i want nitty gritty bloody details because otherwise it's

whenever we're afraid to like use adult language and adult matters and and we and we get in this like cloud of i don't know um pleasant words that that are that are's like, wait, what did he fucking do? How many fingers? I need to know. It matters. Like, exactly what did he do? And as far as creepy celebrities and their underage girlfriends,

I don't know how Seinfeld gets such a goddamn pass, okay? The man was 39. She was 17. And we're not talking about his text message. What are you going to do? We're talking about his steady girlfriend. That's fucked up. You got Woody Allen too?

I dare anyone to stop me. In North Carolina, that's legal. Oh, it was illegal about it. It was legal where he was, yeah. I'm just saying, that's absurd. You guys might remember this. Do you all remember, I think it was JX23 back in the machinima days?

In his 30s, he hooked up with a 15 year old. But the age of consent in whatever European country he was living in was 15. So it was perfectly legal. But he got dropped from machinima anyway. But legal and ethical are not right. People out there, PKA listeners. What was his name? JX? DX? JX 23, I think it was. It was J and then EX 23.

I hope I'm not putting this on the wrong person. That would be bad. It's been like 12 years ago. He said it. Things that happened 12 years ago. Yeah, you better watch out. Somebody will show up over there with a wooden stake and put you out of your misery. I wish I was a vampire.

Then I could be like a big alpha chat at night and go murder people in goth clubs or whatever they're doing these days. Couldn't eat any garlic, though. I want to talk about the whole Ukrainian thing a little bit. I saw that. What's new? Fill me in as though I don't know anything of the past couple months. It's a really big deal. So there's been this squabbling

from the beginning between the United States and the European allies about who's going to send what, how is it going to get financed, and will you do it first? Because it's like, if the US gives them rifles, then it's perfectly fine for poland

to give them rifles russia's not gonna single out poland now and be like oh you gave them rifles you're next they'll be like the u.s gave them rifles it's kind of like anything the u.s will do everybody else is like all right that's the new line we can do that now it's all good and uh it was everything up on two tanks until like a week ago, maybe a couple of days ago. And they were talking about Bradley vehicles, which are like armored us fighting vehicles. They have,

I guess, is that a 25 millimeter cannon? Something like that. Um, it's a uranium depleted shells, but it's not a tank. Um, oh,

most of tanks, like an APC, MRAP, something like that. Looks like looks like yeah there's so many designations and people get butthurt so i don't get i don't even get try to get specific but anyway they changed their mind and they the u.s had said we're not going to send them one abrams tanks not only because mostly because they mentioned the upkeep and uh and everything that's required to keep them operational in the field you have to have a lot of infrastructure and a

lot of experts and a lot a lot of uh people in the field. You have to have a lot of infrastructure and a lot of experts and a lot of people working on them continuously. You have to have parts there and all that stuff. But then they just changed their fucking mind and said they're going to send 31 M1A Abrams tanks. And Germany was like, oh, really? Well, we'll

send a few Leopard tanks. And not only that, anybody else who has Leopard tanks that wants to send some, go ahead. And so there's plenty of countries who have few leopard tanks. And not only that, anybody else who has leopard tanks that wants to send some, go ahead. And so there's plenty of countries who have leopard tanks. Are those our best tanks? Kind of. So we're going to send the version of our tanks that has the newest targeting stuff, the newest scopes and all that stuff. The thing they're not getting, and it's the thing that no one gets, is our fancy armor.

We've got this depleted uranium armor that, and we don't ship that out to anybody. The only people operating those tanks are Americans. So none of us are tank experts, but I've been coming up to speed on this too. The M1 Abrams is particularly hard to maintain.

It has a turbine engine. And I think it runs on jet fuel it does you could take your average jackass who maintains his own dirt bike ask him to work on a diesel engine and he'll be like all right i understand like 30 of this 50 you put them on a fucking jet engine turbine jet fuel burning whatever and it's like i don't even get it how does it start how do you convert a turbine into like trends moving the whole thing is confusing to me and i can't be alone in that people starting to maintain these tanks like understand it even less than you're not i i

think there's a reason though and this is my tinfoil hat conspiracy reason i think it's very obvious that we're getting amazing field data and testing data from all of our maybe not cutting edge but maybe just barely behind current generation tech to see how it fared and the same kind of thing with the tanks it's like well you know people have been complaining these tanks are hard to maintain let's see how they do in a shit environment let's send them to ukraine and get some data these tanks were designed from the get-go to fight russians in eastern europe that's what really or they're fucking right that that's what they're all about so now it's like oh shit there's russians fighting in eastern europe you think these will help yeah yeah i do i think they'll make a huge difference and it was an interesting thanks as you think that america's sending 31

tanks yeah and i think the uk is sending 16 and someone else is sending 16 seems like a decent amount okay well maybe my numbers are low i'm like 31 tanks don't they fight like i don't know 10 at a time or something i'm not sure how this works yeah it seemed like it right like we looked at how like those armored divisions were made up and if memory serves it's like 10 tanks and then like 30 are of those apc type vehicles and then like 300 men i think i think i think that's essentially what it is roughly speaking and to me i'm like does 30 tanks turn the tide because the news is acting like it is now let's make it 60 because let's pretend the leopard is just as good i don't know yeah but uh

let's do 60 tanks turn the tide i'm not sure one interesting thing about tanks is so far we've sent mostly defensive weapons right and the artillery is defensive the the guns that like well i know there's a fine line between defensive and offensive but tanks are meant to advance your troops to take back the land and it's going to be a little while kyle mentioned that there's a lot of training and logistics that needs to happen so they're not going to have the tanks in two weeks but they're talking about like hey as we enter spring and the ground gets less muddy and they can start moving forward that's when these tanks are really going to make a difference another reason that we've held up aside from the logistics is russia's saber rattling maybe like it seemed like first

we give them guns and russia's like you sure you want to fuck with this and then we give them like bigger guns and javelins and russia's like i don't know i'm thinking about a nuclear option then we give them a high mars and russia's like i really think i should like press the button and now we give them tanks just boiling this frog slowly i don't know what's after tanks what jets come after tanks uh the spring is going to be interesting right because not only is the the snow going to presumably go away and the ice thaw out so they can actually move around and maneuver but they called up that second group of half a million russians that'll be there in the spring and one

thing the uk has been doing in particular is they fly 10 000 ukrainians to the uk every month and they train them on tanks and shit like getting them up to nato spec on all the weapon platforms and then every month they send 10 000 more battle battle-trained Ukrainians back home, and they know how to use the shit now. And there's gonna be 60,000 more of those type of troops on the battlefront for Ukraine by the time spring comes around. But again,

half a million more Russians, 60,000 more Ukrainians, plus all the American intelligence and hardware that we can give away. What's happened what's, what's happened with the, the line, the battle line,

the, the map control. I watch this every day and it's to me like my amateur ass looking at it much ado about nothing. Like it literally like the Russians took a kilometer and they took this village and And I look at the village and it's like, my house guest house and stable is as significant as this bullshit. Ukrainian village. Like, Hey,

you got Wendy's there. The Woodworth residence has been seized by Putin. I have as much square footage as that fucking village does. Like, why, why are I watching this news from 6,000 miles away? that fucking village does. Like, is it, why, why are I watching this news from 6,000 miles away? I don't know. Um,

and, and like, again, a kilometer, like these lines are not moving in any significant way in the wintertime. It seems to me. I guess that makes sense. And there was movement in the Wagner group.

I don't know if you guys saw that, if I'm remembering this correctly, one of their commanders defected to was it Finland Sweden? It was one of those countries and he Tried to make a deal to offer to get amnesty in exchange for evidence for war crimes And there was also issue with the Wagner group and the Russian government but for those of you that are watching the Wagner group is mercenaries if I'm not mistaken and They were complaining about being ill-equipped.

Like one time they showed up and there were guns, but the ammo shipment was two days late. So instead to sit there and wait and do nothing and terrifying stuff like that, which begs the question, the expensive PMCs are not being well-equipped. We know the grunts aren't well-equipped. And you talk about that nuclear option. What me and my friends and a lot of other people speculate is what if Russia's nuclear options are way weaker than we think they are? I guess it doesn't take many to end the world. But if they say, oh, we've got 10,000 nukes, what if it's really like 40 that are really functional and good?

I think it's a my numbers are probably bad, but I think it's around 4,500 or 5,000 or something like that that we each have. They have slightly more than us. i think it's a my numbers are probably bad but i think it's around 4 500 or 5 000 or something like that that we each have it's they have slightly more than us um i was watching a whole thing about this earlier today it's it's weird like we signed this whole uh tree against having any sort of like blanket missile defense because both parties need to be vulnerable for there to be mutual assured destruction, right? One of us can't have an overshield. But you hope that we built one anyway, right?

Yeah. You hope that we don't keep our word all the time, right? I want my government to be honest to a point. It's likely that America has shit that we haven't told them about as it does that russia pretended to have shit that they don't really have like that's the mismatch i love it there's no way either side stopped developing that they're like all right like fingers crossed behind their back i can believe that russia secretly didn't develop didn't develop it no

no not like they did it but like they definitely keep trying to do that shit they just keep it under wraps they no i i think you've got like because they want to get the edge on the u.s they'd want to put that those resources into their own pocket buy a fucking yacht and pretend they did it like that that turns out why that's a part of why the russian army is so weak that those bullets they don't have that the uniforms the winter clothing that they don't have it's because some asshole at the top bought a boat yeah and everything that they're fighting with is stuff that was paid for by the Soviet Union in the 80s and almost nobody has the new stuff because they're all in the boat like you said

yeah all the resources I should say i can't imagine you can make a good boat out of guns i'm imagining a bunch of ak's welded together into a giant yacht well that would still float enough water that'd be a sick one but i i well with all these i've been playing lots of rts so i know those tanks are going to be incredibly beneficial for establishing map control for the Ukrainians. They're going to be able to push in. They're going to be able to distract over here and then going around the side. Don't get me in the mix.

I've been playing so much AOE too. I can, I'm still bad, but like getting better at it. And you know, Taylor, seriously though, can't a tank occupy a town? Like couldn't one tank reasonably occupy a small town of people that only have small arms i imagine so yeah i mean they can't they can't stop like actual shit and guerrilla stuff from going on but it would be enough to be like yeah you can't drive your uh armored uh you know death style truck through the road anymore so it's a drifter phrase the question in a clever way, like, can a

tank hold a town when they all have only small arms? Sure, hypothetically. But these people are supplied by a motivated NATO, and there's a javelin behind every tree. Oh, I thought he was talking about in the other way, like the Ukrainian tank sitting in the

or the leopard sitting in the village. Yeah, right. A tank leopard sitting in the village. Yeah, right. A tank can absolutely hold that village. Woody, could a tank hold your property? Yeah, my best gun's like a piece of cow. Jack, he's like, is he still there? He's like, he's still there.

The tank guy's still there. Go out and talk to him. You go fucking talk to him. I'm not talking to the tank guy he's got one of those russian hats on i'm not doing that i've been watching these youtube videos about um i don't know a couple of the different world wars but also about the cold war and i watched some good stuff about uh the nuclear the cold war submarine stuff today and uh this naval intelligence guy was it's fun to they have russians and like u.s

naval intelligence being interviewed from the shit they did in the 70s and 80s and it's funny to see these sailors still kind of be like at like well you know maybe this happened and uh and then there were some people who knows where they came from but you know they were uh sympathetic to the situation whoever they were you know they talked like that a lot and the u.s guy was like you know we wanted to humiliate them whenever we could because we knew we were better we were so far ahead our technology was just so much better so you know there came a time when a russian nuclear submarine just ran aground you know and on screens, it looked like clear channels ahead. Everything was all good for some reason.

We don't know why. And it just ran into Norway. And it was like, really? That happened? And then they show the newspaper articles. Kursk or something? What was it called? Do you remember?

That was one of the disasters. I can't like identify them by name um and they talked about the first nuclear uh american submarine it was well the first one ever wasn't an american one and the russian was like our scientists told us it had to be lies they said a nuclear reactor that's the size of a city block almost no no you don't put that in a submarine but they had they had that's a big win yeah if you were watching that did they have uh stanislav petrov story from the soviet union did i wouldn't know it by his name what uh he was the guy who's broadly credited for saving the world he was working at one of their detection facilities.

An engineer, he helped design it. And their facility detected a nuclear missile being launched at Moscow. And he said, it's really weird. They're launching one. And then another one showed up. And I think maybe a third one. And he and his role of overseeing the facility that he helped created was supposed to call the Kremlin and give them an opportunity for a counterattack. And he said that he just didn't believe that America would send such a small

attack, but he knew the guy that he would call was a war hawk and would inevitably start a nuclear war. And he said, he just didn't want to be responsible. Even though one of the missiles was coming for his facility, he said that he on a, just totally lied and said, Oh guys, it's a system error.

System error here. It's just one of those bugs. Don't worry about it. Don't call it in. It did turn out to be a system error, but he didn't know that at the time. And he got thoroughly punished and demoted and sent out to Siberia for that one. That guy's a hero. That would be.

It's probably all lies that he told. You guys fucking a general's daughter or something like that no i say the word please well he'd make up a different lie that didn't make him look like he almost betrayed the soviet union to serve america oh see that was just a that was a cover story it's like no i thought they were going i guess the u.s navy had had or or has this submarine with wheels so they bring it down to the ocean and it travels by road quickly

it's technically amphibious so it's for doing sneaky underwater stuff like messing with cables and and infrastructure underwater. So they just drive up to whatever they want to fuck with and park. And it doesn't matter what the what the water currents do because they're sat there and then they're sending divers out to like go fuck with stuff. I guess the Navy had this entire. Oh, there was this huge incident.

I guess the Navy had this entire, oh, there was this huge incident. I think it was Sweden, I think. Yeah, it's Sweden, where Swedish waters were being penetrated by Soviet submarines. And it was a huge problem. It was news stories. The public was told to spot them and report them. People were on the beaches with binoculars. They were depth charging them from the skies, and they had depth charges planted all along the ocean floor,

so if they heard the boat near one of those, they could push a button like Battleship and detonate a charge that was already there. Well, they hear it. They hear the click, click, click, click. Oh, fuck. Hit the big one. So this one guy hits the biggest mine ever, apparently,

and they fuck up the nuclear submarine. And it turns out that what was going on is that the British and the Americans were terrorizing the Swedish to make them not like the Soviets. Oh, no. So they damaged one of those submarines. Who knows what kind.

But when our submarines get hurt, they release this green goo that floats to the top in case they need to be rescued. It makes a pool of green goo. And you're like, ah, right there in the goo. And that's apparently only NATO vessels would do that. But anyway, they went through this long story of how through chain of command,

this guy was in charge of the defense. And he was like, i wanted to detonate the whole ocean floor i wanted to set them all off and they said you only have permission to set off one and i couldn't understand he's like now i understand i was a useful fool and i was played because i was technically a terrorist like they let the Americans or the British, whomever it was, just leave. They were like, yeah, just chill. But the whole thing was blamed on the Russians.

It was this huge international incident. The Russians were constantly denying. I really like those history channel-like YouTube channels. I think the one I've been watching is called Dark Skies or something. They often add kind of a dark spin on historical events. It's like, but little did they know the Americans were two steps ahead. You're like, oh, what'd they do? You know, when I listen to war stories one time out of three, I feel like we're really the good guys.

But that track record makes it hard to really buy into us being good. When were we the most bad guy-ish? Recently, I don't like that we invaded Iraq on the weapons of mass destruction thing. Liberated. A million Iraqis died, I'm told. Thousands of Americans died. And they had no proof of weapons of mass destruction, yet did it anyway. The proof they put in a single capital punishment case, like the I's they dot and T's they cross, is so much higher than what they put for killing a million Iraqis.

And this might be, now I'm going off the rails. I honestly think that the assassination attempt on Bush Sr. is a big motivator for why America actually attacked Iraq. No, sir. Okay, go ahead. I disagree.

I'm pulling memories here, which have been damaged. I think Saddam Hussein was working on a way to export oil to Europe. So it would be you know we have the petrol dollar where opec and saudi arabia and a lot of these countries trade oil only on the u.s dollar right or with the u.s dollar saddam wanted to bust that up and get a euro oil trade going on and the bush administration had this invasion plan on the desk since like 92 ready to go yeah i mean this happened with muammar gaddafi he wanted to send oil from libya and to do it on the you know the euro

and so the u.s dollar is kind of how big business is done and anytime someone wants to change that fact the u.s gets awful fighty yeah they. They fall down stairs. They fall out of windows. They fall on their own knife collection. They have a heart attack. It's just so tragic. Sometimes they stab themselves to death. Can you imagine killing yourself? I hate these assholes that shoot themselves in the head three times.

Yeah. In the back of the head twice in like the trunk of his own car. It's like, what do I do? Don't forget the guy that exposed the Iran Contra scandal where the CIA was trading drugs for to fund the Contras in South America. He died of a suicide not long afterwards. Yeah. Had you ever seen the video we've talked about? This is many years ago.

We talked about it on the show. I found this from like ONA, Opie and Anthony. They were watching this clip from like the late 80s, early 90s of this dude in like California who invented an engine that ran on water. And he was like,

it's not that powerful, but there's lots of places to go from here. If you have tap water, that'll run it. Distilled water will run it. You don't have water, use snow, let it melt. That'll run it. Ice can run it use snow let it melt that'll run it ice can run it let it melt and like it was a local news story covering him like steve myers brand new fuel cell could revolutionize energy use

and he died of being poisoned he he was eating at a restaurant and he got up and ran outside and said, I've been poisoned. And then he died. And it was actually poison. Okay. Like, I mean, he didn't get a ton of attention, but yeah, he had a water cell. And then he was so excited about it that he had to poison himself at Applebee's. Like, oh, it just as I was watching the clip, like from like 92 or whatever, it's's like this guy should don't fucking talk about this man like like why would you bring you in fairness that might have just been Applebee's

yeah something wrong with that microwave there but a lot of people that worked on electric water or hydrogen cars there was a huge number of them that died of suicides and accidents and very few products ever came to market a lot of

products the notes were destroyed so many weird like dozens i couldn't even list specific ones there's probably a wikipedia page that lists all the people that were working on water-powered cars that committed suicide yeah all the dude stanley meyer the electric car thing so elon musk in 2019 announces the Cybertruck. He says the Cybertruck will come out into mass production in 2021. And then it gets a little closer and he says, all right, all right, I'm at 2022. And then it gets a little closer. I'm in 2023.

But he said it like two weeks ago, late 2020, 2023. The Cybertruck is coming out. And my fucking retarded ass is like is it for real this time oh he's saying 2023 and it is 2023 i'm not sure he's done that move before and and you know i'm seeing like some big fucking stamping machine show up in texas and they're like it's for real this time we have a car expert on and he's like it's not for real it's not gonna look anything like that it can't look like that it doesn't meet like passenger stuff like it's just a mess and uh uh he just announced 2024 he pushed

it a year like he has every year for the last three years oh no did he come up passenger safety that's because the cold rolled steel will deflect bullets and stop damage on a construction site but if somebody hits you or you get hit the car will not crumple so your body will crumple. That's how cars were in the 50s.

The cars kind of held up to head-on collisions but the people died inside. It's not just... The modern construction of vehicles allows for this slower deceleration on collisions but the people died inside yeah well it's not just it was so like the modern construction of vehicles allows for this like slower deceleration because that's you know what's really hurting you it's going from we talk about going from 60 to 0 to 60 a lot but going from 60 to 0 is a is a much more serious and impressive thing um and if you can go from 60 to 0 and spread that out over a few more milliseconds microseroseconds, whatever the fuck, that's the difference between people being alive and people being dead meat.

And my dad's got a – well, we built it together, that 1955 Chevrolet. And once we bought it, just a wreck of a thing, and when we got the first coats of paint off, you could see this thing had been in a major collision such that it had been cut in half this was two cars put together it was like what hit at a train so yeah cars are built a little bit different now i don't know that because that thing's made of stainless steel like a delorean or whatever the fuck it is that like i'm sure it has crumple zones intended like you can't oh the n what is the nstca the national highway traffic safety association like they have um they have like regulations cars have to have a certain safety standard you can't just put a fucking has had very very high ratings consistently yeah tesla has yes yeah but like they haven't made a new thing since that that was safe since that this would be their second car realistically so a serious question

i was a huge fan of the cyber truck i wanted to buy one in 2019 had the money ready i'm a lot more skeptical now do you guys still want to buy a cyber truck we'll say based on its looks let's say yeah and if what elon says is true well we'll see the price also changed like like i was like not only is this thing only forty thousand dollars which is kind of where not nice trucks start nowadays like fuck inflation's rough folks and uh and and it's like that's a hell of a deal not only is it electric it's fast it looks cool it's novel it kind of reminds me of the warthog from halo i think i'd wrap mine green i'd wrap it because i'd buy a black one wrap it in green when i got tired of being a fucking weeb i'd peel that shit off and be a normal human being and i'd have a cool looking car it made a lot of sense

but since then it's like looking less and less likely that the thing is just going to happen at all and more like look he's these days he is much more pt barnum than he is edison and that's hurtful for me to say because i like the spacex stuff and i was inspired when i saw him crying in that that spacex documentary that felt real to me that he has a passion for space flight and and all that shit he preaches about Mars. He loves space. Dude, he owns a goddamn rocket company. I'm being serious. He's addicted to

space. He loves space. He went up there in a car. That's a great analogy. You can see the P.T. Barnum aspect of his management of Twitter. That has been a complete and total shit show. And everywhere I go, he's got an army of simps. It's like,

oh yeah, it's a galaxy brain decision to require your employees to bring their own toilet paper because you're not buying anybody. Or they don't own the building. The building is suing him because they haven't paid rent since he took over and stuff like that. So my faith in the cyber... Are we sympathizing with a landlord now?

Yeah, I'm sympathizing with a landlord. There's Satan, then landlords, and then pedophiles. That's where it goes. These people are renting their property out to others at an affordable rate. I got in with

the landlord on that one. You can't just break your lease and not pay. I'm with him. I'm just not going to demonize Elonk because he didn't pay send the landlord to space i don't care i demonize elon musk for this and i've said it before if you tell me you're gonna finish painting this room in two days and it takes you three you made a mistake i get it we've all been there if you tell me you're two days away and then it takes you 733 more days you lied in the first place and elon musk does that every fucking time it doesn't matter if he's talking about when we're going to be on mars when the cyber truck is going to drop how far his fucking cars could drive

everything he says is a lie and an exaggeration and i'm frustrated by that more than anything else he is like i think kyle nailed it in in that he is infinitely more at this stage in his life, Billy Mays, than he is an inventor. Come on. Come on. The man is incredibly good. He's a pitch guy. That's what Elon is at this point. He's the best pitch guy of all time.

Give him credit. He's a good pitch guy. He gets attention for his shit. He's the best there's ever been. Steve Jobs. Well, I'd say Billy Mays is pretty good. I think you're being unfair to Billy Mays. Billy Mays sold mostly good products. Billy Mays here, high on cocaine,

talking about Kaboom. Oh, wait. I saw them. I love doing this. I like Billy Mays. I like how I was saying Elon was the best of all time. I did this last night. I pull up CNN and I pull up Fox News

and I go back and forth and I don't watch the programming because that's dreadful. I did this last night. I pull up CNN and I pull up Fox News and I go back and forth and I don't watch the programming because that's dreadful. I watch the commercials. I don't get a lot of commercials. This is where I can get them. I got this Hulu package where I get everything live and it's like I have cable again. It feels good. It feels like home. I go to CNN. Their commercial

is this multiracial family that's like they need car insurance or something and it's like some car insurance that's for specifically for like handicapped polyasians or something like that yeah and um polyasian pretty high rates and i was like all right all right little niche for me but i guess you know you know know your viewership and i slipped switched over to Fox News and it was that MyPillowCockSucker. He's on there and he's got, I shit you not, he

has pulled the crucifix necklace out so that it dangles and it not well. It's not hanging like a chain that you would wear outside because sometimes you wear a chain outside and it's fine. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it. He has just pulled it out enough to be like, look right here. It's like dangling awkwardly right out of this little whatever this creepy little thing is. Oh, it's not as long as it should be. No. just like pulled it out enough to be like look right here it's like dangling awkwardly right out of this little oh it's not as long as it should be so no yeah it could be he just he's

like so it's clearly a last minute decision hold up this is fox news we need more jesus in this this is a commercial that's right but when he filmed it he's hawking pillows and he's talking he's got a picture of jesus christ behind him with the thorny crown and he's got and he's got a picture of Jesus Christ behind him with a thorny crown and he's got I think the cotton comes a huge picture of Christ with a thorny crown if he were in the shot it would be half of the screen those better be some good pillows

and there's a big crucifix behind him and then of course I think the cotton comes from Israel or some shit have you ever heard that guy that guy loves israel mesopotamian fucking cotton that the lord blessed and and he's just hocking this shit so hard and i had to turn all that shit off and go over to espn um where where where they they advertise to me with slim gems and beer you know what the most unacceptable thing about his pillows are that I found out?

Is that if his pillows, they arrive all compacted, and then you have to put them in the dryer. So it's like now you're making your own pillow. Oh, that's cool. And I just don't believe it's going to be that good. I would give it a fair shot. I'm not a pillow-ist. I would try it it but i don't want to have to make my own pillow and i think we're well past the time of that no pushback pillow we want a firmer pillow now what

if the box was shaped like what if the box was shaped like a hebrew tomb with the stone rolled in the on the side and he was like on the third day on the side and he was like on the third day on the third day Jesus rose rested it rises it has your pillow has risen it has risen it has risen indeed so you wouldn't buy that

but your grandma sure as heck would buy that yeah no honestly there's no fucking way my grandma would get higher quality pillows than that she's not she wouldn't buy a pillow she had to put in the fucking dryer is the my pillow bad is there anything it's not a bad product i bet it's a very outspoken um right wing and and you know i think he went hard trump and and like maybe some other but it's probably said some awful things probably fine i'm sure it's a good pillow yeah how complicated does the pillow have to be exactly i have a few fancy pillows like like like i don't have like a matching set of pillows i have like four unique pillows that that you would see

on like maybe the internet and be like oh what a funky pillow and like never buy that 120 pillow that feels like a bag of knots. And you sleep on that? Yeah, I've got one where if you feel it, it feels like it's made of stretchy rubber bands, like hundreds of them that are all in there being, I don't know. And I've got a couple of the gel pillows. You've got stuffed animals too, right? Fuck no, that's some weird shit.

You go into a grown man's house and he's got stuffed animals. And look, if he's got some plushies from some Star Wars shit or whatever, that's alright. But if you've got a busy bee that you need near you... This is an orange creamsicle. Yeah, it's got a fucking name and it's not... You haven't even been ironic in giving it a human name.

Like, this is Pete. You went so far as to be like, this is Vanilla Dave. He lives in the kingdom of fucking Vanilla Beans. He sucks my cock while the monkeys watch. I got a bunch of stuffed animals. They're all like, you put your neck in them, sore all the time.

Just got something a little more decorative. And being bedridden, you get an exception. Oh, well, if I want to watch TV, I just do that. Okay. I'm sweeping with a broad stroke here but you know i'm sure some of y'all not him that have stuffed animals or normal decent people my wife made me custom ones they're pretty fun uh and the other thing is i feel like from your wife

i'll be honest i feel like with like the current environment and the way it's been for a long time like i've talked about how it feels weird as a as a man my age to talk to little kids in public like like because you'll have kids approach you be like like playing with balls in your neighborhood or whatever like like there's children that live in my neighborhood and like their frisbee will fly in the yard and i want to like i'm thinking like i'd love to throw frisbee with those fucking kids i really would i like throwing frisbee will fly in the yard and i want to like i'm thinking like i'd love to throw frisbee with those fucking kids i really would i like throwing frisbee i'm gonna i'm gonna urge you not to follow that instinct dude i know right yeah you're gonna get arrested do it do it show how strong you are something you think you can throw frisbee fast and hard

in that bitch protect your face bitches i'm. I'm cool. You put like a squat. I do the whole Xeno warrior princess. La la la la la la la. Decapitate little Timmy over there. Great idea. They wouldn't mind that. I feel like if I bust your kid's nose with a baseball and he comes home, they're like, at least he didn't bust your ass. At least he's not

a fucking pedophile. He's 36. If we're being kind. Random children in the park. If we stop counting for a while. I think there were those two little black girls in my last neighborhood. They were super friendly. I remember for

Christmas or their birthday, they got those little electric Barbie cars. They went so fast. I wanted to run run over there be like hey that thing is so cool but when i was a kid like an 80 fucking eight or whatever like hours were slow and they made a noise they went it sounded like a power drill struggling okay hers is like zipping around almost silently and it's fast she's obeying the stop signs in the neighborhood it's cute as shit and i wanted to talk to her and like they would come over and be

like hey mister hey what are you where do you live what do you do what is what is that i like your car like whatever and i'm like fuck is your dad here i want to wave at him i need to make eye contact with your father before we continue this conversation. You get that nod of approval, it's okay. I don't want him to discover me having a conversation with his kids because that's fucking weird. He doesn't know they initiated it. He doesn't know that I wasn't like, hey, come here. And if I'm a parent, that's what I'm thinking, right?

Because it's scary. Kyle, just act natural. Go over to the kid. Get on one knee. Get real close. Grab him by the shoulders and say, you want to be friends yeah you want to be friends you know what Tom Brady would do in a moment like this young man you know what he'd do I saw the way you threw that ball a minute ago that was that was beautiful son I know your daddy

doesn't kiss you on the mouth like this that's because he doesn't love you the way Tom Brady does he'll never be a champion like Tomady hold on take a step back for a second there's a patrol car driving by give me one more kiss son and if anybody ever talk comes around here talking that bill belichick shit and don't you tell anyone about this is our little secret yeah kissing pals that's all just make sure that you bring all you have to do like to show that like you're interested in being friends with the kids just like bring bring toys bring bring things like give them candy i didn't say i want to be friends with a fucking kid all i said would be nice to be able to be friendly to children because right now i feel like i need to be like cold i need to be like

they need to know that like i'm that man or something. That would be better than Oh yeah, we love going over to Kyle's house. He's got so many toys. Oh, it's so great. I don't want you saying that shit. I want you being like, yeah, I don't know what that man's name is, but when we tried to wave and play bubbles with him,

he spit on the ground and gave us a mean look and slammed his door. That's what I want. He hates children. He's the fur and gave us a mean look and slammed his door. That's what I want them to think. He hates children. He's the furthest thing from a pedophile. He hates children. It's better for them to think that you're like the Cruella de Vil of fucking children than them to think that you're trying to get them in their house

and fucking make them into a pile. You're making children so you do it 101 times? But women don't have this problem. You need a lot of little ones to make up for that one big one. That would have made more sense. Why didn't she get a big, full-grown Dalmatian? The two parent dogs. She didn't need 101 puppies.

She needed two adult dogs. She was an idiot through and through. I didn't respect her the entire film. No, no. Puppies are softer. Puppies have softer fur, so it'll make a higher quality coat. You treat the fur. I'm sold.

I'm sold. I want a puppy coat. She had cornered the Dalmatian market. No one else was making Dalmatian coats. There was no point of comparison. She wanted hers to be unique the way I remember it. It's been a while since I watched the Dalmatian coats. I hated

101 Dalmatians. Of all the Disney movies, I was actively bored by it. I really disliked it. There were some adult names in there. No, no. Because I liked Jungle Book and all the other ones

that were older. Oh, it is one of the older films. You just like the racist one. Isn't it one of the older films? Isn't it from the 90s? I mean, it's really old. I think it's from the older... I think it's in the 90s,

but it's set in the 60s or something. Who knows where it's set? But I'm just thinking back that I remember the McDonald's toys, right? The little beanie baby plushie things. How many you got, Drifter? Those? None. I had them when I was a kid. When I was a kid, I had all of the McDonald's

101 Dalmatian little beanie baby whatever they were, I had them. What I currently have is none. I don't have any stuff. That's what I was getting at earlier. As a grown-ass man Yeah I don't have any stuff That's what I was getting at earlier As a grown ass man I don't want any weird Shit that you might think

With some Justin Roiland type paraphernalia In my house right I don't need any stuffed toys I don't need anything that a kid would look at And be like that's fun Come on kids Come into my house No one's going to tell

Nothing matters Suddenly this old nihilism Come on, kids. Come to my house. No one's going to tell. No one's going to tell. You're safe. Come on. Nothing matters. Suddenly, this whole nihilism shtick. Everything's getting very real, Morty. Fuck. Everything. I was all about nihilism until, fuck, man. I'm going to be in prison, Morty. In prison. Being raped. For real this time, Morty.

He's going to have to go to trial. He could recreate that stupid trial clip that he voice acted. Like the real life on the transcript. I did that smarming. Nothing matters, Dick Morty. I did it for years and now everything's closing in. It's very real.

Dude, it's sad to see. I legitimately enjoy that show. I've watched it. I have fond memories of watching that show with loved ones. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. That's a little part of my like culture or like my life is ricking more just a little bit i don't want to be one of those fucking weirdos it was remember those guys who were standing on like mcdonald's counters like like i want the sauce fucking want the sauce like like

remember the guy that won the sauce and got death threats over it yeah like my fandom never rises to those levels like like i will i'll sit here and just be a quiet like appreciative fan like a good boy and that's how i am with rick and morty and so it's to me it's it's the death of the show 100 it's the death of the show because he's not just a voice actor okay he's not just the guy who does the voice of apu he's half the fucking writing and idea staff as well. People will be like, no, oh, the other guy's all the ideas. Do you really think so? You really think they've been partners and they're splitting this shit down the middle because one guy can do funny voices?

We couldn't have outsourced him $50 million ago? People on Twitter disagree. Like I said, the guy from Squanch Tendo Games. Of course they do. You've got to disagree. He's the creative director or something or another at Squanch Tendo Games. He said Justin Roiland hasn't been involved in the writing in the show since like season three. Is he distancing himself from Justin Roiland?

Oh, yeah, because Justin Roiland had to also retire from his own studio. He put in his letter of resignation. You know, what's funny is like if you if that's true, I've always maintained that season three was the last good one. So if that is true, Justin Roiland was the lifeblood of the show. If that's the case, and he really did take a step back after three, because there was a marked tone difference in four and the other ones, and it was not as funny. It wasn't as good.

They tried to get Jerry in it too much. I don't give a fuck about Jerry, and I don't care about Summer, and I don't care. It's about Rick and Morty. Summer's fun. Summer can be fun. I'm just kind of being silly, but I don't care. It's about Rick and Morty. Summer's fun. Summer can be fun. I'm just kind of being silly.

I'm disappointed in him. I think that's what I'm really feeling. Hey, man, you had a responsibility to be an upright, decent human enough so that you won't be legally removed from your job and society. I was counting on you to entertain me, asshole.

I'm invested. But now none of it matters. And I guess this was a show that didn't really matter anyway. This wasn't like, dude, if this had happened with Game of Thrones, can you imagine? Can you imagine? It was bad enough with House of Cards. That was bad. But something even

bigger like Game of Thrones. What about the upcoming Flash movie with that Ezra Miller who had kidnapped women? I don't know how that's going to go. even bigger like game of thrones if what about the upcoming flash movie with that uh ezra miller who had like kidnapped women i don't know how that's gonna go or you know channel five with andrew callahan channel that channel five and all gas no brakes was modern gonzo journalism it was some of the best reporting anywhere that we were seeing even if it was a bit silly and but he was like for blm and stuff he was like on the streets interviewing people inside of a burning building. Nobody else was doing that.

Like you said, now it doesn't matter because he's checked into psychiatric care for sexually assaulting or coercion a ton of women. Yeah, it's a bad look. Are we on to all gas, no brakes? Yeah, a little bit. Yeah, I knew that he had

done something and then he had apologized. I didn't know that he had checked checked in somewhere i thought his documentary was um bad i thought it felt like a youtube video and it felt like an unfinished work and it felt like they were 75% of the way to making something that was even on hbo's level and the fact that it was there was weird to me i watched it i enjoyed it but it was a it was a dis. The fact that it was there was weird to me. I watched it. I enjoyed it. It was a disjointed mess. That wasn't some artistic flair of his. The way

it begins is absurd, but that aside, he didn't have a product to sell. It feels like he was contracted to make this thing maybe two or three years ago. What happened was he got COVID on January 6th. So he's not there for the ultimate event of the documentary.

He's like, it's all building to January 6th. Right? Like, and he's there every step of the way he's at these rallies and events, like watching the, the fervor be, be,

be fucking stoked. And then he's like, and then I got COVID. So I wasn't there for any of january 6th i was actually with my nephew tommy tommy what's going on i don't know what do you think about politics and i'm like well are we are we going to interview this fucking random kid you gotta pat it out you lost the ending to the movie yeah it's like wait this happened and then you kept filming like yeah like it seems like that's kind of crying to h of it. You didn't go crying to HBO and say,

we're going to have to get somebody to fill in for me. I thought it was okay to attend Republican events with COVID. There you go. No, I think he was really sick, though. For a while, it was pretty rough. He didn't have one of those fun COVID days. He didn't stop Herman Cain from going to the rally. You make him lose.

Herman Cain award? Herman Cain. I used to, Herman cain jokes aside i knew of herman cain for a long time leading up to this thing and uh he was an interesting guy and and uh he spoke so well he's got this brilliant had this really interesting way of speaking and if you remember he had a very simple tax code nine nine nine it was like nine percent sales tax nine percent income tax maybe nine percent corporate tax or something like that he's like flat tax across the board everything nine percent it's like that's every time they asked him a question that was his answer

is israel has been stepping up their aggression on the gaza strip and the iranians are threatening to uh do this that and the other What do you think? I think nine, nine, nine, every time. And he, of course, lost that. He didn't make it through the primaries, but he had this really popular political radio show here in Atlanta. And I listened to it a lot because he was a fun guy to talk to, and he seemed like

he was in the know. He had been a candidate, and he would speak on that sometimes. But he was a COVID denier who died from COVID. So now there's a award named after him. And that's what he'll go down as. It is like the first line in his obituary. I love that his family was still tweeting COVID denial stuff from his account after he was dead.

From his point of view. Were they signing it like Susie? No, I don't think so. I think they were sharing news and stuff. Oh. They didn't want to lose the reach of the account. They were tweeting as if Herman Cain himself was still denying COVID after he died from it. They should have kept that bit going.

Are they saying it might still be? I'm prepping for my run of 24. I don't know if you guys know, but when you die, your accounts do get inherited. Little Grim, I had to set this up recently. If something were to happen to me, my wife can actually run my accounts as legacy accounts and continue to monetize them and make long-term revenue long after I'm toast. And anybody can do that.

So Herman Cain, he was elderly. He could have just set it up for his grandkids or whatever, get the account, and they can just go ham on it and make money and sell pillows. Someone just has the password. They didn't go through any of it. There's tweet. But, I mean, the best example of this is Mountain Dog. I bet if you go to his channel right now, there are videos of him reuploaded.

This guy died how to blast your triceps in 2024 like so drifter there's this guy named mountain dog okay 20 or something and he's this was this enormous like geared up you know uh bodybuilder guy and he died of his heart exploding as they do. They kept, I think they deleted his old catalog slowly and re-uploaded it. You can go to his channel and it's like 10 tips. Five days ago,

nine days ago, two weeks ago, two weeks ago, two weeks ago, three weeks ago. This guy has a regular upload. He uploads more than PKA does. You're getting dead for years. A ghost is beating you in consistency congratulations and so i hope they're still getting money there's another one was it yoda slayer was it yoda slayer a minecraft youtuber who died and uh his kids took over the channel for at least a while

yeah i wouldn't be surprised i mean it seems like if i were mountain dog's kid or whatever i would have been like i mean i guess we may as well double dip here on a lot of this and just keep going literally free money i think i think someone mentioned that his family needed the money for something um like and uh and that that was kind of a known thing that and that that's everybody was like yeah let's go re-watch that old tricep blast video to help mountain dog's family with i don't know whatever he's a professional bodybuilder i'm sure he knows how to grow muscles just don't take his cardiac advice yeah i mean like he had that arm shit you you know those veins we've talked about where the where it really grows getting like a like a river veins yeah yeah it's really gross it you know where

it's it's not like a bicep vein across the length it like goes a little bit and then they're squiggle squiggle squiggle squiggle squiggle like back and forth all all knotted up gross and apparently that is like a huge indicator those like folded up veins of like your heart is actively dying like it's it's real gross like that fingers if you have if you have the tips of your fingers get fat and clubbed that means you're you're dying no if they're clubbed you'll know they'll look like little penises oh let's not go straight to the hospital how many girls can i fit on one hand you're bleeding out of your ass or whatever probably at most did either or any of you i should say uh watch episode two of the last of us i did i really enjoy that show i think it's great

that show was very good that's gonna be a big popular show i think and that little girl's gonna be a big star yeah you know why she's that one worth saving up for? I've been trying to wait for it to complete so I can watch it like a big marathon. Here's what I do honestly. The third episode will be out six days from now. And it's going to be

almost an hour and a half. The first episode is 82 minutes. The second episode is about 55. And the third episode is over almost an hour and a half again. If second episode is about 55, and the third episode is over almost an hour and a half again. If you started with episode 3, you'd have three and a half hours of content

to roll through roughly there. Three hours and 50 minutes or so. A lot of content. It'd feel like more than three, so it wouldn't be a bad time to start. It's a fun show. I have never played the games. What I know of the games comes from like scrolling through reddit and just seeing pictures of the game i've never even watched a video i have no idea and i don't care too frankly um i like this this tv show though

and the fact that the game fans say that oh this is great they're so happy with the the adaptation is i guess a cherry on top it's good to see that but overall it's just a good fucking tv show it's it's like well filmed it's it's well done there's some there's some little corny jokes here and there where like the little girl's kind of like a smart aleck but i don't mind that that's kind of like what she was in game of thrones and i don't mind that that's kind of showing through in her still a little bit um she's a fun little character uh and pedro pascal is always good he's playing that like ptsd ridden guy who's 20 years too old in a world that doesn't really um let have too many old men in it anymore and he was a he was a gulf uh war veteran you know this thing is the beginning of the show is set in 2003, and the majority

of the show is set in 2023. The bad thing that happens that fucks the world up happens in 2003, and then the future we live in is 2023, and they're on this mission walking across, I suppose the whole country. Right now, we're still in Boston, but it's Pedro know pedro and the

little girl doing their like mandalorian yoda impression and i'm down for it i'm down for it it's good i mean uh you know the the girl the little girl actor she's 19 that's why she's doing a great job is because she's like an adult playing a younger role because you're right like there are so many times where like that yeah where the kid like if they actually get a 12 year old to play a 12 year old you're like god damn it like i know you're really trying like i know you're doing your absolute best but i like you're a reminder i have a theory about this i i feel like there's a a gap in the middle where they get kind of self-aware and become bad actors like 11 year olds play 11 year olds really well or nine year olds, you know, they're, they're excitedly playing and their roles usually expect them to be children and they act like children and they're crushing it.

You'll get the Sandlot or whatever. And they're just, you know, running from place to place as if they were playing in their own backyards. Cool. When they hit like 16, suddenly they're terrible actors. They're self-aware.

They don't know what they're terrible actors they're self-aware they don't know what they're doing they're saying their lines wondering what people think about them saying their lines like a non-actor would and then maybe if you're lucky in adulthood they become actual good actors that it's what happened to me in my um child porn career i started pure right the emotions were real, you were a producer. No, I was a child. And the performances were authentic. Everyone could see what I was doing.

That'd be really odd for that industry. And that it was genuine. And then as I hit my teen years, suddenly they're like, he's acting. He doesn't have the same fire that he used to. It happens to us child stars all the time. All the Eastern European gangsters that normally run the child porn racket, they're like, this new little woody guy. Seven years old.

He take half our margin. What is this shit? He's slamming the table with a baby skull that he uses as a gavel they're like watching your videos not even like jacking off just like mad like how are we to compete with this metal strip of acting

and then you get self aware this has been a little woody production it's like it ends with like shh Woody production. Bing! It's like it ends with like shh. I used that same intro and guitar riff that I did on YouTube. Oh, I can hear it. For YouTube, you're just like

I need a little jingle. Hold up, I got this old thing laying around from my original career. One of the guards delivered my mail Monday, so we're going to do that. We're going to do that again. Dear Woody. Dear Woody, you've destroyed my life

and my family's. Another one of these. I will never be the same. Only letter a certain kind of letter these days. It's not good for my mental health, and they know that. All right. Let's go to you omar how's your day going you know how i'm going bitch man in a little while i'm gonna fucking kill woody

like i'm tired he's a fucking child born shitty he talks about it like he's fucking tarantino are you actually a chomo if you were the child are you actually no he'd be a he'd be a cholo of righteousness he'd be eliminating the perverts and that happened cholo chomo no the cholos and the nazis they they all hate pedophiles do they something they can agree on they may be like hitler that guy you know a lot of good points what wait you pedophile oh yeah we got to get rid of this guy oh you're gonna you're talking shit on me on my 13 swastika tattoos well you know remove the plank from your eye before you know try to read this guy's mind all right so here's my question let's say you go to prison for realsies right like like uh you you're you're in you're gonna have to join the aryan brotherhood

it's like clearly like the only option i'm gonna look so fucking ugly my question is i got i got questions about the tattoo situation because i'm willing to be a girl just let me have my hair they won't be intimidated let me be the guy with the mohawk at least like yeah that's an offer we extend to some guys but you physically know like shave your head i'm just wondering if it's like if in that scene in office space where they were upset because jennifer aniston didn't have enough flair right she he's like well you know you've got 12 pieces of flair but look at jimmy over there he's got 37 swastikas all right he's got a swastika in his ear look at that yeah that must have hurt like you got one swastika

taylor look i'm just thinking that maybe you'd want to show your passion for the for the brotherhood i think that that would be difficult because like you'd want to start out being like they're like all right we're tatting you up and i'd'd be like, yeah, you know where I really like tattoos like my heel. And they'd be like, no, no, man. This has got to be visible with the t-shirt on. And then you'd slowly get more and more.

You shave your head and get the tattoos on the sides of your head and stuff. So in prison, you're a Nazi. And then when you're out, you just let your hair grow out and it's all gone. That's honestly probably it. Yeah. Unlucky you, male pattern baldness kicked in halfway through that sentence.

Now you look like the most extreme Nazi ever. That guy wants everyone to know what's up. He must have been born with those birthmarks. Could you imagine being in prison? The Aryan Brotherhood calls a meeting and they're like, look,

Taylor, we appreciate your support for the cause of white supremacy and selling methamphetamines all over the United States, but we just don't feel that you're committed on a fashion standpoint. The Nazi flair isn't out there. You don't have a single face tattoo.

We got your arms tatted up, but you don't even have anything crazy over your heart. If you get molested in the shower by another gang, we need them to have Nazi tramp stamps to stare at. They're letting us down here. Maybe a bit of a dog whistle tattoo. How about

88? Let's put a nice 88 on there. This is what happened. I was genuinely thinking about getting another tattoo. And I was like, so where are we on this? What should I get? And I'm always on the lookout for ideas. I'm 90% full of shit. Like I have.

Think about tattoos for 10 years. I have one. I mean, you've already got one. And I thought about, I was like, what if I took Jackie's birth date, like the month and the day and the year and added them together and got that as a tattoo? It's not quite as corny as the dates that everyone else has it in. It's 88. And I'm like, 88. That's a cool fucking number.

I like that. Especially this Eric Landros's number. I was a fan. Yep. I'm like, I could get 88 tattooed on me and that'd be like a badass idea. I'm like, I could get 88 tattooed on me and that'd be like a badass idea. And then I looked into it some more and it turns out 88 stands for HH,

which stands for how hit Hulk Hogan. Yep. Yeah. All the little Hulksters know 88. The Hulkster was not shy of the N-word. Or dating teenagers. One of those is cool. You know, like if you go back

and listen to what he said... Hulk Hogan. Yeah, yeah. It's fucking hilarious. We need to clarify this. He goes on this rant. So maybe y'all haven't heard it. So basically, his daughter...

First of all, if you don't know this, Hulk Hogan had a reality show back in the early-ish 2000s. It was when reality shows were kind of new-ish, and everybody was kind of getting their own. Like, that kind of reality show was new. The one that Paris Hilton modeled.

Yeah, and Danny Bonaduce show was the greatest reality show ever made, by the way. Ozzy Osbourne. Danny Bonaduce, they only made one season. He chugged a bottle of absolute vodka and skateboarded into traffic at one point I thought the Gary Busey show was wild

oh I don't know if I saw that but back on track who was I zeroing in on oh Hitler in the 80s we were talking about the minimalist Hulk show so Hulk has everybody in Hulk's family looks like a fucking Nazi super

baby. They're all bleached, blonde, beautiful, and like big-breasted or muscular, or both. And anyway, his daughter Brooke was kind of becoming like a fake pop star, which was a possible thing to do. There was a couple of fake pop stars back then, girls who couldn't sing, who were just

attractive and could lip sync. Like Ashley Simpson. Like Ashley Simpson, who got found out on SNl and a classic fucking clip on you'll find on youtube if you want a real laugh and uh anyways daughter brooke was becoming one of these beautiful like good-looking blonde girl and i think that she had gotten a black boyfriend or was dating a black guy and he's like caught on this voice message the hulkster is saying something like if she's gonna f a ninja then she could at least find a football player or something or a basketball player like

somebody it was something like along those lines and it's like damn Hulkster oh my god can't co-sign any of that Hulk had it rough did he have a relationship with his daughter's 19 year old friend if I'm not mistaken

That was the Hulk Hogan sex tape And his wife but hey a lot of No no no that was his friend's wife That's a whole other situation I don't know about that though so that was okay They had an open relationship I saw that sex tape I gotta say Hulk Was looking great for being like 65

Dude was still jacked I was impressed I think that's a crime i don't i don't think you know that was recorded without his him knowing that's a seat that's him like recording that's a crime now it wasn't a crime at the time because they had a camera right what didn't he kill gawker because gawker put up his sex tape and then he was like take that shit down and then they were like hulk hogan asked us to take down his sex tape and we're not going to. And then they were destroyed. Yeah.

All of them. The court was amazing. You remember in court, the judge told him to stop laughing because this wasn't funny because the Gawker guy was like telling jokes and shit on the stand instead of being a normal witness. I didn't see that. Did you get money out of it, though? Like, I know that he bankrupted gawker but it liquidated them so whatever their liquidation was worth that's yeah assumption like did i'm gonna google it i wonder if hulk hogan i would like to know too

i do know that he did voice acting he was in uh china illinois on adult swim he played the headmaster of the college or whatever he was it was a surprisingly good voice actor. I think he lives in Tampa or it's, it's down in Florida, but I was, I was there one time and we saw him at like this, like bar grill type. It was like an outdoor bar with like, they serve food on too.

And I was like, Oh shit, that's fucking Hulk Hogan. Hulk Hogan. They were like, let's go, let's go talk to him. I was like, we are not going to bother Hulk fucking Hogan at a were like, let's go. Let's go talk to him. It's like,

we are not going to bother Hulk fucking Hogan at a restaurant. Like, like suplex you. Well, I'm not worried. He's going to beat me up. Like I always end word. So like,

I'm not like a Hulk Hogan fan or anything, but I do think of him as like a real celebrity. So if I went over there and I thought he looked small in person or, or if he was rude, like for no reason, or, or if I like, you know, anything that made me

think less of him that would you don't meet your you know your heroes again not that hulk hogan is a hero but but he's i think of him in a certain way and i don't want that to change just like a father figure like you know like a like a bleach blonde racist that's been hiding his male pattern baldness since 1987 i want him to be that in my mind taylor and if i were to meet him and he's a good guy fuck if he wasn't a good guy you wouldn't like that what i meant if he was he's like super courteous to you and you're like he's a he's a pussy yeah like all for show like all the other wrestlers like the undertaker does child's charity. Kane is a sweetheart. You know, all these other people.

Or what is it? Stone Cold Steve Austin is a devout Christian now or something. It's like, I want Hulk Hogan to stay a trashy piece of shit. I want him to be the guy that beats his wife and blames her for it. I looked up the Hulk Hogan settlement because I was curious and I thought listeners might be too. So he was awarded $140 million, but they didn't immediately pay and they whatever. It settled for 31 million. But the way that it works out is the attorneys take a part of that.

He has to pay taxes on that. He has to pay taxes on the part that the attorneys took. And Hulk Hogan's take home was about 10 million, which is that's dog shit. Oh, come on. That's 10 million out of 140. It does out of 31, right? Sorry.

Well, it started at 140. That was what he won. And then they settled like Gawker was like, fuck you. I'm not paying 140 million. They did agreed to pay 31 million. Hulk Hogan's portion of that being about 10.

Mike, my guesstimation is Gawker was like, we sold the fucking desks the chairs and mike's pencil holder we've got 31 31.2 if you want to round it up 31 31.2 you can take that or you take my fucking fillings cocksucker and they're like all right 31.2 gawker was a media company they wouldn't have had much in the way of physical assets, and their value would have been brand goodwill or brand evaluation

and future potential earnings. Well, they came up with 31 somewhere. Yeah, well, that's where it would pull from. Or would they be forced to take out a loan? That'd be crazy, right? Who's going to loan a bankrupt company? Okay, we're talking about this. Have y'all seen the Alex Jones shenanigans about how he's trying to avoid getting paid?'s insane so you know that they the jury won 1.4

billion dollars or something like that and of course he's going to appeal or whatever but uh he's filed in court that he is personally bankrupt and free speech systems is bankrupt and actually in debt to another company in Nevada. It's the holding company for the supplements. He's like $30 million in debt to them. But then when you look who owns the supplement company, it's Alex Jones and his parents. So he's $50 million in debt to himself and his parents. And he's like making all these bizarre court filings saying free speech systems is broke. And because of that, we want to use our remaining funds to pay our employees to stay on the air, to keep earning money,

to pay back the families. But the employee that he wants to get paid is himself his entire year salary up front and like goes on the show and literally on the show says, please donate to the cause. You're help keeping me on air by the alpha male, whatever.

I promise you none of this money will go to the Sandy Hook families. We're going to beat that. And then two days later goes to court and says, we're bankrupt. And the only way we can ever pay these families is if we stay on air and keep selling the supplements. And it's getting very illegal, very fast, if you can't tell. There was a ruling saying that he can't, that that's not going to work. So what happens is he owns these companies and his companies own these companies. And I think there's even a third layer of companies that own the companies that own the companies. And the court has said, yeah, none of that bullshit's working.

The families are due money from all the way through. Woody, let me ask you an old white man question. Like when you've got an old rich white man question, when you've got companies that own companies that own companies, is that always a sign of some sort of malfeasance or is there ever a realistic good reason to have what I assume are shell companies? There are good reasons. Is that what

those are referred to as? I hear people talk about shell companies and spy movies. Is that what they're talking about when you've got all these silly companies sort of owing each other money? Yeah, you you got wolf cola out there taking all your losses for you the question is good reasons so the question was asked to me drifter um the old question the rich one yeah and we cover this in business school too but um it can be both sometimes there are companies that own companies because this is the division of the

way that the companies operate, right? Pepsi may have a different company for each of its brands. Pepsi probably has a different company for Wendy's than it does for the soda, etc., etc. So you would want to organize your companies by their business structures and silos. That's one reason. Another is kind of what you were hinting at, which is like limiting liability and such. For example, every taxi in New York is its own company. And that company owns almost nothing but maybe the taxi. And that taxi. And that taxi maybe.

And that way that if that taxi kills someone who's owing $10 million or something, they're like, great, you get $25,000. That's all this company has. And the car! And the car. And then the victim doesn't get what they might expect to get from this giant taxi company. And that's what the shells are for. All right.

So Alex Jones almost certainly structured his company from the very start in sort of a sneaky, precarious kind of way that maybe he always... He is hawking silly supplements. Not like us. We make good... Canadian or American made? I'm not really sure. We make good supplements here, wherever they come from. They make you bust.

For reals. They're made in the USA. Are they? We got a fucking stamp on it. Thank God. How many stars are on the flag hang on I can't see the cuffs matter everywhere

made in the US of A for red blooded American men who want to come more it's hard with my brain United States of Amelia what the fuck you just made it get there that one Amelia? What the fuck? He just is like,

made in America. Get there. That one. Look at that focus. Oh, he broke out the knife. Made in America. So do you guys not use shell companies? That's why I was kind of butting in, Woody. To protect my identity and stuff. We don't talk about our corporate structure on the show.

We don't? Mm-mm. Because I don't okay because i don't know yeah i mean i imagine lots of like really rich people do it to just hedge like what he was saying like it's not always insidious it's like a liability thing but in this case it probably was a hedge against like known impropriety that was going i could almost make an argument both ways like you know the media company is one thing the supplement company is

another that i don't know what else he has cooking you know another one that sits atop and owns them both but uh i'm pretty sure in his case he's very intentionally like moving money away from the company that lost the settlement. Oh, on a different note, I don't really follow the royal politics. I think it's one of the... The royals seem like their version of the Kardashians to me in some way. It seems gross. Really, the way the media acts is the gross part, though. Prince Andrew aside, they've been the grosser side

of that relationship generationally like they killed princess diane as far as i'm concerned not that i you know like whatever but um more recently with the prince andrew uh sexual stuff with the jeffrey epstein and everything the queen uh like a month or two before she died, took away like his. He was no longer allowed to call himself his royal highness. She like took that away. And then she like called her boys at the Navy or whatever and took away all of his fake like military awards. And they actually might not have been fake. That dude probably served in World War Two. Like odds are that they took all that away to took all that shit.

He is absolutely the queen. I mean, the queen was in. All right. You're right, because the queen was in World War Two. So maybe he was in Vietnam. Her son wouldn't be. Yeah, they probably stationed somewhere. He got the new king now kicked him out of the palace.

He's no longer welcome on the royal grounds. That's what I was going to say. And they made a big story of this. Woody, they were like Princerew has lost his suite at buckingham palace where he's lived like forever and apparently it's like super pimp i don't think it's like some nice bedroom i think it's like a huge wing of a palace um and basically he's been kicked out of it and they were like now he'll have to reside at his other palace at St. James. Ha ha ha! That bitch. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

I think it was St. James Palace. I read it this morning, and I just had sustained a bit of a head injury as I went down the stairs, so my memory might not be with me. Zach, could you find us a picture, if that's true, of St. James Palace or whatever palace he has to live in now? Because Reddit was like, a win for the good guys

and i nobody was focusing on the fact that he now has to move to his other palace i wonder if buckingham palace is a nice place to live they're doing a 400 million dollar renovation right now i'm not pretty good i'm not doubting that it's a great building i'm wondering if it's a great lifestyle can you walk out of it and just go places? How's the parking? Is it like staying at a hotel where it's kind of a pain in the ass to get to your car? I guess there's staff that takes you to your car. Is that a pain in the ass to have valet service?

I kind of like my car right in the driveway. It couldn't be more convenient. It's not too far from the kitchen. That looks nice. Looks like you'd enjoy a present in the driveway. It couldn't be more convenient. It's not too far from the kitchen. That looks nice. Looks like you'd enjoy St. James Palace there. He drives himself. What a commoner. How many Range Rovers is that?

Right? I just wonder if living in Buckingham Palace is a cool lifestyle. Or does it kind of suck? You're a little captive. You get a private chef oh my god yeah you get every everything is private imagine if you woke up at two in the morning and you were just like i want a whole thanksgiving dinner your private chef has to make that happen imagine getting stoned and any fantasy food you

think of they just have to deliver as soon as they possibly can that's life in buckingham palace imagine imagine if you if your rolls royce limousine pulls up to like uh over to some attractive ladies and you lean out no matter what the fuck you look like and you say good evening ladies the prince wanted to know if you'd like to go to the palace with him tonight he's's having a few select friends and people over, and he saw you, and you're very striking. Would you like to join him for the evening? There ain't no fucking way them girls are not getting into that

Rolls-Royce limo to go to the palace, right? Right? Isn't that literally every girl's dream growing up, or at least what Disney told me it was? Swim to where, but Prince Charming? To be clear, these girls will put out in this scenario i don't fucking know i would imagine because of the implication my probability because like i am like i i don't know maybe not beautiful girls young ones or whatever but like i'm not short on people to go to lunch with i could call a friend like it's not like like I have problems getting company.

What is the bonus for getting these girls? They're not going to eat your ass and play with your balls at the same time. And we said we weren't sure, but that's the clarity I need. I'm not sure if every single – what I mean to say is, I don't know, this is a hundred for a hundred shot here that every girl that you pull over is going to hop in and blow the prince. What I'm saying, it's got to work 75, 80 percent of the time. If it's a single young lady who's like, really, the prince wants me to go to the palace?

I think we're implying I'm going to fuck him, huh? Well, if you're lucky, madam, let's fingers crossed, bitch. And she's getting in. I got to believe that. I got to believe that I gotta believe that lady that listens let me know not Prince Andrew himself because he's like

decrepit but like you know Prince Charles from like his heyday if that big eared cocksucker pulled over in his limo and was like would you like to go to the palace to my suite? You'd pile in there, right? My mind is on well, he has enough money

that he could get one of those high-end escorts. I forget the They do. There was a New York politician who had an escort who was like $12,000 a night. I forget her name. The New York Madam? No, that was the one that committed suicide. escort who was like twelve thousand dollars a night i forget her name the new york madam no that was the one that committed suicide well if you remember it's sort of funny you say that

woody because that is what jeffrey epstein was kind of operating as is sort of that middleman who gets you a girl um they they said those girls were getting paid three hundred dollars i don't i don't know if they were um if prince andrew had to pay for anything the way the story was told like they had sort of sold it to that girl but the girl was telling one underage girl was like telling another that like yeah I got to fuck the prince like yeah

they let me have sex with him that's the problem with this industry like you think it's cool and in theory libertarianly should be legal to just hire high net force if you're rich or like but then you think it's cool and it, in theory, like libertarianly should be legal to just hire. I didn't say that. If you're rich or like, but then everybody that works in that business, they all traffic people and they do horrible things with underage girls.

And there's no, because if you're like, if you think about it, if you're running the escort agency for the Royals, are you just going, picking up Insta models or are you going to be the really horrible guy that can fulfill any request so here's the problem that if you pay i don't even know 300 500 for an escort then you're getting

the kind of person that you're talked about that you're talking about right someone who's who will fuck you for 200 is not someone you want to fuck however someone who will fuck you for 12 000 she has a master's degree she is beautiful she is wearing their tight black skin or dress or whatever and selling herself for twelve thousand dollars to people who are connected rich and powerful like elliot spitzer was i think when i hear that there's a twelve thousand dollar a night prostitute it's in the same vein as like a five thousand dollar a shot whiskey or something it's just it's just silliness it's just silly just over nobody's nobody's flying in and dropping twelve thousand dollars you're her only client that's a different scenario she's not a prostitute anymore

she's a sugar baby now she just doesn't have to do five tricks a day it's a couple of months call that woody a wife a wife call it a wife oh you pay her twelve thousand dollars a month and she fucks you that's your wife not your wife every wife who's done her job every happy one do you guys think prostitution should be legal yeah sure i think it should be legal and federally regulated i think um that that will have a lot of good entrepreneurs who'll step up to the plate and uh and fill the void that'll be left by the disgusting pimps that that are currently you know right now it's just there's there's a cycle of abuse there right and and there's a lot of hesitancy to like put your

to dip your toes in the world of prostitution if you're the government I think But man it works in Nevada right You see like so much less So much less like death, abuse, violence Suicide rates and all that stuff Drug use, everything that corresponds All the other negatives that Sort of usually go hand in hand with that Vice, they're diminished considerably

When you regulate and legalize Is it legal in Nevada? Inside, alright so it's like Outside of Las Vegas I think It's legal considerably when you regulate and legalize. Is it legal in Nevada? Inside. All right. So it's like outside of Las Vegas, I think it's legal. Interesting. That's my understanding because if you get that's outside Vegas, that's out in the desert.

So my understanding is that if you get a prostitute off the strip, that is prostitution. And if they want to make a deal of it, vice will come lock your ass up. I bet it's not a big deal there because it's so common. I bet it's about like a DUI, a light DUI, I'll call it. Guessing.

But you can go right outside and, you know, the city to a whorehouse that's 100% legal where you, you know, I think I saw an HBO-like documentary in one of those places. I've never been to one, but, you know, you go in and pick a lady to fucking go fuck her. There was an HBO reality series about it. I've never been to one, but you know, you go in and pick a lady to fucking

go fuck her. There was an HBO reality series about it. I've seen a bunch of episodes. The Bunny Ranch, right? Yeah. I may have watched the same documentary. It came on probably about 1am on HBO, Moonlight Bunny Ranch. I gotta make the most

of this. We've only got it free for seven days around the holiday. It was dark times before the internet, okay? All of you guys are old enough to remember when it was whatever was on cable. Oh, you guys had HBO? I'm watching it through the squigglies, trying to make out boobies.

Squigglies! When he's propping up his dad's pornos and shining a bright light on one side to project a woman onto his wall. If I wiggle the pages, she moves. It's like she's dancing. She's really here. Yeah, dance, you dirty hole.

Dance, you fucking slut. I'll tear you right out of that book, you bitch. Just like I did Sandra. That was dirty talk is on point. I like it. I'll tear you out of that book you bitch imagine it being even worse imagine it being like the 30s and you have to go to the to the bad part of town to go to like the grimy porno theater and the porn that's there is just whatever of the two tapes reels reels that they had in town and you got the guy cranking it and six other dudes sitting beside you watching this

old porn if that were the only way to consume it in the 70s I'm not surprised a lot of people just steered clear because sitting next to a bunch of the kind of people who would masturbate next to other men in public has got to be just a

ghoulish experience it's got to be just a ghoulish experience. Like it's got to be satanic in those rooms. Is it just all men sitting in what to me is like a 1990s movie theater next to each other? Is that, I only know 99.9% men. There'd be very few female clients. Yeah.

I would be surprised if any, that's the going into the rapist's den potentially i mean maybe if you're running like lesbian fetish porn in the 70s but even still that'd probably be mostly men yeah you'd think there'd be women working there like it's a target rich environment yeah maybe where do i find horny men. Everywhere. On the sticky section. No, imagine being the janitor that has to clean that up. I would imagine that that has got to be the highest paid job at the establishment. I was thinking of the cum scrubber.

You don't think so? Or an ex-con. No, I think they just get an ex-con who just has to keep a job to stay out of jail and they pay him absolute crap to scrub up all the cum off everything he couldn't hack it at denny's as a line cook and so now he's rubbing cum on the in the adult theater uh what a life what a life we just made up how sad yeah no i would would you guys feel comfortable doing that if they were if you were like man man i want to jack off but it's 1971 and i really don't want to get in my car and drive to this place where everybody knows like hey that's ted beating off ted and yeah yeah yeah like no i couldn't do it i bet it was super prior stigma yeah prior to vhs and betamax like i guess there really wasn't much porn you could watch at home.

Yeah, it doesn't seem like it. There would have been some little reels maybe, but that would have been rare, rare, rare. And you got to set up a projector and a screen. You got to clear the whole family out of the living room to set up the projector. All right, everyone, it's time for you to get ice cream. Time for the kids to go to get mom and dad are putting on a show um yeah yeah it's funny we talk

all the time about like ah you kids didn't understand before the internet porn was rough we had to watch cinemax uh shit people could say that to us and be like you didn't understand before vhs we had to use magazines. It could even be illegal in certain places. People were getting arrested at gay bars basically for being gay into the 60s and late 50s at least. Pornography was

and obscenity laws and freedom of speech were not quite what they were today. You could get arrested for obscenity or Pee Wee Herman got busted for public exposure. It was not as legal as what we deal with now that was a false flag he didn't he wasn't beating off in there thank you kyle i thought that was a decent from dude i loved that movie so much peewee's big adventure so i didn't know about that i didn't know there was a movie as a kid i had seen the show though i grew up with the show um he was playhouse yeah it was time for the mail again and then like that thing comes in the the window the the mail there was it was like a a really disjointed and jarring blues clues like where there was a lot he got a bad rap because

because parents couldn't explain to kids my age that he was jerking off, so they kind of made it sound like he was a pedophile or something. Yep, so my parents told me. And so that kind of stuck, and it was like, dude was just jerking off, right? Like, minding his own business in his seat that plenty

of other dudes had jerked off in, I'm sure, and that's what he got busted for. How do you even get arrested for that? What cop is like, you know what? That's what he was doing that night I'm sure it was a cop whose job that night Was to sit in that theater and look for somebody jerking it Or they targeted

Maybe they targeted him Specifically Look, if I'm a cop and I see a celebrity Duck into a porno theater, I'm going to be like I'm this close to busting dayway i didn't think about what an asshole they were you little fuck like a guy jerking off in a place where you jerk off is bullshit it is bullshit you jerk off with a wink and a nod there though because it's not supposed to be like it's like yeah we all know you're doing it it's like when you got a beer in a brown bag right

like yeah we know what's going on here but just keep it on the down low all right yeah don't go crazy but it's like maybe I'm wrong but I feel like the adult theater business model is guys go in there and jerk off that that's the whole model 100% yeah they're not like taking memories see we Herman jerking off that other people go

in there hoping not to be exposed to sexual acts he's the victim this would have been the mid to late acts? Hold up. This would have been the mid to late 80s. So I assume it would have been the Nancy Reagan morality push. You know, I would guess lockdown all this stuff.

I would guess 90s because yeah, I was born in 86. So okay. And I knew about this shit for whatever reason when I was a young man. So okay. So, okay. It was 1991. Uh, and then,

I mean, let's see, I was born and I knew about this. This was one of those like grade school things that came up. That was like, you know, that show Peewee with Peewee Herman, he molests kids.

What did they tell you about AIDS? Uh, I, I really didn't get much of an education on AIDS other than like it's an std like and it's the and it was like told as like the fucking worst one like the do not pass go you will die of this at the time that was 100 true they did not have the treatments they have today yeah it was a doubt magic magic's whole like campaign on nbc was was still very much going on when i was like five uh so i remember being five four or five years old and watching like magic on tv being like you know

talking about fucking aids and like growing up knowing that like it could get in your blood and you couldn't get it out and you couldn't stop it from killing you you were just dead yeah unless you were magic and nobody's that big and strong it was like maybe if you ball out hard enough you can survive but probably not you're white magic johnson getting aids or hiv was uh was almost like a 9-11 sort of you remember where you were when you heard it moment for people my age and uh i was at a away meet for my college swim team when we found out that magic Johnson had this. And we were all like,

whoa, he's going to die. This guy has like two years left. And I can't think of a celebrity today who is the parallel to magic Johnson. Back then. He was like the best basketball player. His career was still active.

He even came back and play a little bit with AIDS. This career is still active. He was like the champ. His career was still active. He even came back and played a little bit with AIDS. His career was still active. He was the champ, and he was so charismatic. Everybody loved Magic Johnson. They don't feel that way about Joel Embiid or Kyrie Irving or whoever is today's best player and joke-ick. Magic Johnson was popular culture. And damn, it was a big deal.

I'm glad he's okay. Yeah, and he spent his life educating and he's and and like he's still do i mean he's fine right like for it i don't remember this as well at the time because people didn't want to play with him yeah yeah okay i didn't want to play with him they didn't want him on the court uh and it was like oh if you got aids you must be gay well they asked that but they didn't want him to sweat like you're gonna sweat playing basketball and no one wanted like they're like how do i play with the guy who's about to sweat all over me yeah and you know what like people didn't know i think it turns out that that's not a real concern but when i you know in 1993 or whatever it was it was like yeah you know, you know, it's not fair. What do you, yeah, it's scary.

Nobody really knew it was all, I mean, all the stuff I got, I went to public school. The information was wild, conflicting. Uh, I had a police officer come to school and say stuff like, uh, people with AIDS would try to bite or spit at them, which probably wasn't real. Uh, one way it is. Uh, well, one person told me you could get it from sweat one person said you didn't uh if i went to bible school it was only gay people get aids uh it was i mean early 90s education on this was like like almost nothing today i'm like can you get it from

swallowing cum i think you can't but it seems like you should i think you're gonna need an open womb you would need something because like i think the reason that it spreads so much from anal sex is but it seems like you should. I think you're going to need an open wound along the way. I think the reason that it spreads so much from anal sex is because that creates a lot of fissures and damage to your tissue, and so there's a lot of inroads for it to go in. I think that's a very absorbent area, too. I think much like the inside of your mouth, maybe it's absorbing some nutrients down there, like sucking up some little AIDS particles.

I don't know if you know about the AIDS molecule. You've seen it right under a microscope. No, I'm trying to be silly here. It's a virus. I was I was so worried about looking like a dickhead. I was like, I think he's joking with me, but I'm not. about looking like a dickhead. I was like, I think he's joking with me,

but I'm not a thousand percent sure. I wanted you to laugh at me, and then I was going to say that it was shaped like little gay people or something. It's just a bunch of little Harvey Pius things running around in a microscope. I mean, back to the time.

Before it was HIV, it was GRID. Woody, are you old enough to remember GRID? Was that a thing? GRID. When it was HIV, it was GRID. Woody, are you old enough to remember GRID? Was that a thing? GRID. When it was very first discovered, it was discovered exclusively in gay communities. And for the first three or four years of its existence, they called it gay-related immunodeficiency.

Oh. And they genuinely thought that there was something about being gay that caused people to become immunodeficient. And it took a while for HIV as we know it to become the name. Yeah. For them to realize it's just the mechanics of what they're doing that makes it more, much more likely, not like a gay people have a gene.

Taylor, I don't know if that's true. I think that if that were true, then they wouldn't let gay people give blood. I can't even keep up. It's because they don't i get that one it's weird to me that gay people still can't get it's weird to what would he gay people can't get blood like that's a thing

they fixed that woody Woody. Your lefty buddies. They didn't. You can't get blood if you're gay. That's just a thing. And I'm like, isn't that? Is there just a really homophobic guy at the door? I asked you. There's a questionnaire.

Have you been to Africa in the last three months? Have you had sex with someone for money in the last couple months have you had a tattoo are you gay this is in the questionnaire yeah i don't think i thought i thought they let the gays give blood now that's the only yeah i'm sure that they don't yeah so basically they just like exclude people who are likely to have that. Is that it? That might have been true in 92. I doubt it's true now. Maybe I'm remembering the question correctly,

because Zach here says that if you haven't had gay sex in the last three months, they let you do it. Yeah. That's weirdly specific. No, it's not. Well, you're in the middle of a dry spell. You're trying to feel good about yourself. You want to do something to help the world you go hey you want hey you want to slim down maybe it's been three months do you need to slim down a little how about a pint of blood you know what that weighs fucking two pounds bro yeah and how many calories does it take to

replenish that blood that's something you're not considering i bet some you're gonna you're gonna have that gaunt faint look after you give this blood. It's going to be a good look for you. I'm going to start giving blood. Well, three months, you said? Dude, I pass out every fucking time. Taylor, that was a good joke. They might not notice, but I like it. Drifter, I bet you've given a lot of blood. Do you get squeamish at all with the needles and the multiple vials of dark fucking plasma being taken and shit?

I didn't used to. Last year, I had one of my veins explode again they're like we have a training nurse and we want you to be her first real patient we have a we have an expert nurse here to help her i shit you not uh i can't have but you know you're supposed to stick it in sort of long way she went in sideways straight across the fucking the main nurse was like whoa and it was and after that i'm way more reluctant to give blood now oh my every time i do it i get very lightheaded i get faint uh and and and the time and time is ticking you got to be quick to get

to get if you got if you're gonna take seven or eight vials you better get moving buddy because they have to uh click and unclick the thing so they have to try to hold it still with one hand and pop it out without moving it and then click another one in without moving it yeah and every fucking time you're getting re-stabbed i yeah well it's wiggling around in there and like and like the last time i gave blood like i or you know got got all my blood work done like like me and this guy are having a conversation because and we both know that that i'm trying to he's trying to keep me awake and i know so i'm trying to keep me awake and i've got like you're gonna be okay yeah fucking reservoir dogs isn't it great that i know that immediately the way you said you're

gonna be okay that you mean reservoir say the magic words you're gonna be okay fucking harvey kytel's the best um yeah i know i'm going down eventually i got those i bet we all know what those brown paper towels taste like when they're wet you know those cheap ass recycled brown paper towels that you've had yeah from from sports never like they were always at school so like anytime you have them in your mouth, though? Well, the water drips off of them. You taste them eventually by putting the cold thing on your face. And it has a smell.

It has this wet cardboard smell. Yeah, it smells and tastes like school. Anyway. That's wild. I can viscerally smell exactly what you're talking about. And I haven't seen one of those since I left school, like high school. They've got them at LabCorp before I get my blood work done. Old LabCorp. They'll provide them free of charge.

That gentleman was great. I always, I've told this before, but I always try to hype them up because I want them to do a good job. I was like, I bet you're a professional at this. You probably do it every day. I probably won't feel a thing, huh? They're like, oh, shit.

Maybe, I guess if I try hard, I can live up to this guy's expectations. I'll do my best. You got a good attitude. I try to set them up, and if they do the first, no matter how well they do the first initial thing, I'm like, damn, you are good at this.

I'm trying to really build this guy's confidence up because I want him to shine right now because I need him for the next 10 minutes so that I don't crack my skull on that countertop. I gave blood at the blood connection or something. And I tell the same stupid fucking dad joke every time. In my head, these people are doing this all day every day i am their 19 000th person they've done this on yeah and my veins are easy to spot like honest to goodness from like 14 feet away i told a woman i'm told my veins are easy and she's like yeah i can see it from here you have the easiest veins I'll encounter today. Like, that's who I am. So I get this woman and I say the same stupid fucking joke.

Like, oh, is this your first time? And she's like, wait, what? Seriously? Like, this is your first first time? And she's like, on a live person, yes. This is my first time. Oh, on a live. How'd it go with the dead guy?

I think it was like a model or something. Like she went through phlebotomy camp yesterday, and now it's her first day actually sticking something that's alive as opposed to like a mannequin. And she like gets up next to my vein and waits there and waits there and waits there. Like she's fucking icing the kicker in an nfl game and and i by the way like i've donated blood a lot of times so it's no big deal i don't you know

i'm like all right all right it's your first time someone's got to be and it might as well be guy like me and uh then she puts it in really really slowly she's maximizing how much this hurts and then she pulls it out a little bit because she got scared and re-stabbed guys the blood it's it's shooting not like in the roof or anything but like four inches and i'm it's getting blood all over my t-shirt all over my shorts like i'm bleeding everywhere what did she do well she's under the guidance of somebody who's better and and that person oh really with like a bandage and like covers the open wound yeah yeah and then they wrap it up with that stretchy little colored bandage and they switch arms and arms.

Yeah. Yeah. And I even let the new do it again to my other arm because I'm like trying to be nice. And she she also did it really, really slow, but she did it better. I mean, I got no patience for that lately. I can be I can be super polite while people are bad at whatever they're doing and be like encouraging or helpful or whatever i need to be in that moment but not what if you're jabbing me with a needle like i no no no i'm not this is this might be a learning hospital or some shit but i'm not a

learning patient i'm not a guinea pig you get somebody knows how to fucking do this shit or i'm gonna be so goddamn difficult about this. Don't let him do anything. I've done what Kyle's talking, but not for me. One time they couldn't find Hope's vein, my daughter, and she was like three, and she had a big cut on her forehead. It was using the ER, and they wanted to give her an IV, and this woman, she couldn't find her vein. Now, Hope's veins at the time were very hard to find.

Kids are tough. And I think I've told this before, but she stuck her once didn't work stuck her twice didn't work and i was like you're fired and uh they're like no no no this is a hospital we all have to learn we have to do it like you've tried it go get your ace and they're like we don't have aces around here but i'm like yeah you do you know this is what i said i was like everybody here knows who's really good at this everyone on this floor knows that nurse who gets the the hard veins the first time it's time to get her and they're like yeah and i'm like yeah and they're like okay and they went they went and got someone else leave bro she got it first hospital 15 minutes away you could see hope's skull like we were gonna stick oh my god but we were gonna stick around

but we see i heard somebody over here needed the ace like a gunslinger shows up got six shooter needles like uh like the mexican bullet belts just needles give me a smile sweetheart sweetheart. Look at the fib. She's probably 45 years old. And she was the ace. And she went and she... It didn't even seem hard to her. She's just like, all right, this is what I'm here for. Yeah, because she was the ace and they fibbed.

There was an ace the whole time. They were just like, this guy doesn't need the ace. Yeah, I'll be the one to decide when they need the ace. I've always been real squeamish about about that and getting that done not a fan of oh i read what is a hole right just like when you're watching it come out of you you know what it is it's it's this might sound weird it's my blood that bothers me like if you if you're hurt and i need to help you like i'll be i'll be fine like like like um it's it's when i'm bleeding and my blood is like coming out of me and it's it that really fucks me up um it's also a bit usually if i'm

gushing blood i've also just sustained a bit of an injury too so i'm a little out of it because of that so like maybe that's contributing but just in general like like i'm talking about giving blood so that's that's clearly the different case. That bothers me. Seeing my blood come out is a big part of it. I try to look away, but I know what these big-ass... I'm like, how many do you have to take? Because I never know. It depends what's been ordered.

Your blood is your life. He flips to the second page of tests, and I'm like... I feel like you're describing my life right now. Basically that every three months. It's like eight vials or something, which I don't know if that's a lot. I'm sure there's some

four. But it's a lot. It feels like a lot of my blood is gone after they're done and I feel lightheaded. But yeah, I don't like seeing my blood come out. But like shooting deer, that never bothered me. That blood's never been a big deal. No, it's animal blood. It would be upsetting to see an animal bleed

if it was your dog or something, but when you're going out there to shoot a deer, it's going to break your head. Well, yeah, I'm talking about more like the sight of blood certainly isn't the problem because I've been in slaughterhouses, and I've hunted a lot. I've seen plenty of that.

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Limited time offer. Hell of a deal. Get fucked up on drugs you can get online. I have a death by gummies story. I'm famously the THC virgin on this show, but that's not really true anymore. I've been taking the wacky weeds one, like once a night, I like,

I like going to bed with the, it helps me fall asleep. It's good. Putting my son to sleep is kind of an ordeal lately. I don't need to talk, but yeah, it just talks and talks and talks and he drags out. He doesn't want to go to bed or whatever.

And, and when I have a little wacky weed, it's like, you know what? Yeah, tell me about your third favorite death of Walking Dead. I'm interested. I love... Damn, what else do you... No, no, don't turn those off. Every time you tell this story, I feel...

I think it's going to lead to you drugging your son. And every time, I'm happily surprised when it's just you relaxing so you can handle his little story it's it's it's how it goes so much more wholesome so i'm down anyway i am no longer the thc virgin that i once was i'm a bit of a thc slut now taking it on the daily deep throating these gummy bears so um i'm like you know what i'm running low on the wacky weeds in between shipments. I appreciate what you guys do for me, but I could use more.

But I have these death by gummies that stack up around here, right? Because I'm not a heavyweight like that, but I think now I am. Now I'm going to have a death by gummies gummy, and I'm going to have a whole one because I feel like getting the effects of it tonight. How many milligrams is a whole one? I don't fucking know. Enough that i woke up in the middle of the night

and went to the bathroom and laid on the tile floor because it was cold i am not ready for this shit yet 150 milligrams no they're they're a hundred a piece and and just like we always tag this to the end of the read like we're we're not fucking around. Like, don't. I'm being serious. We're not fucking around with how strong these are. Buy yourself one pouch, one of the 1,000 milligrams, and that's not 10 edibles, even though there's 10 in there. That's way more than 10.

Do not start with one if you have a low tolerance. You will have a bad time. They're very fucking strong. So take it easy on them. Yeah. And if you are currently a guy who says well i take 250 so i'll just enjoy this 100 by death by gummies there's a very real chance that the people who sold you your 250s lied to you and death by gummies is not so you

might be taking 20 or something and thinking it's 50 and then you've upped your dose by five times not knowing what you're up oh yeah death by. Death by gummies is so strong, the government stepped in to go these are too strong and they said, fuck you. People are getting too high. The government kind of had a point, try a half or a third

of one. Fascism, you should be able to get as blasted on and look and I'll show Drifter. It's not a gummy bear. It's this. It really is. You could.

You should eat one. I mean, Kyle likes to be high on the show. I don't like to be high on the show because I feel like it makes me like, that's not actually funny. Don't say that. Oh, you should have said that. Or something like that. Kyle can do it just fine. I know you don't get high for the show either, right?

Like, three times I have. You know, like, it's not like I'm opposed to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We did it for the... Like, if I took, like, a few hits of the vape, I'd be fucking fine, but I'm not taking edibles on the show. And I don't even, like...

Like, I like getting high when everything is done for the day, you know? Like, there are people like Kyle who, like, enjoy, like, there are people like kyle who like enjoy like getting high before working out or like with their morning coffee or whatever like if like sometimes i'll do that and i always regret it i'll be like oh i should take a hit or something and then work out and i'll do it and be like fuck like oh yeah this is why i don't do this because i still have shit i have to do but i'm gonna do it slower and not be as focused and i

won't even be enjoying the feeling of being high whereas like like after i knock this show out my evening's done and it's like i can just relax enjoy play some games really you know enjoy it i don't have to feel like i'm fighting back against it in order to be effective which is what i feel like if i'm high and i have shit to do like i i don't want to and like you fuck your tolerance up being high all day. Real bad. I didn't think about that. Yeah, maybe that's why I'm not getting into death by gummy shape

because I'm only doing it for bedtime. I need morning, noon, and night gummies to help me. If it's a new 24-7, it'll really ramp it up as different than once a day. When I first started getting sick, I had to 24-7 Delta 8 to kind of function because I was feeling like crap and very rapidly i started getting used to it and building up a tolerance which was no fun because then you just have to take more and more to get the same

effect yeah well in this case more and more is this much yeah yeah like if i see an edible now where it's like you get to eat this whole cookie for 20 milligrams, I'm like, fuck you. Like, fuck you. Give me a gummy bear that I can just go and I'm good. Like, I don't want a whole snack. I want to get high and then later enjoy a snack that's not that doesn't have weed in it because your weed cookies don't taste good. Guys, they're not regular cookies are better. I've never had a weed cookie.

You're winning me over to your taste. It tastes a little like weed, which takes you out of the cookie experience A humming bear doesn't taste like weed The other problem is though If you like have Like all the delicious edibles Weed cookies, weed ice cream, weed sodas And all that stuff in legal states

You'll have one of those and be like great And then you'll get stoned and get the munchies And the only food you have are like More weed sodas and weed brownies and you're like just have another one or two it's not so bad and you're gone yeah i tried a well i was this is years ago in colorado but they i was at the dispensary and they had blue moon beer weed weed beer and so it didn't have alcohol in it it just had thc in it and you know when you're in like a legal state especially years ago it's like you want to try all the different things.

Like, oh, I want to try some flour. I want to try some edibles. Like, what? A drink? Like, I'd never seen a weed drink before. And so I got one of those. It was the worst consumer decision ever. It was disgusting.

It was the worst tasting beverage I've ever had. And it only had like 15 milligrams in it. And so I had like one swig. It was like. It was the worst tasting beverage I've ever had. And it only had like 15 milligrams in it. And so I had like one swig and was like, no, we figured it out with smoking it. Like for sure. Smoking it and eating it. We don't need to have a disgusting,

skunky, skunky liquid. It's like, it's still got hops in it. And it's like, why? That sounds gross. I can tell you the sodas have improved considerably.

I had some last year in Seattle and they were, I wouldn't have no idea there was any cannabis in them at all. I'll try one next time. Not a beer, a soda. Because the soda with the sweetness, it can at least fight back against it a little bit. As a heads up, the sodas hit fast. They're all sugar, just like the gummy bears, but they're already like liquidy and digested. They just 10, 15 minutes.

You're going. I'm good with that. I like the quick onset. I want a stevia gummy bear, right? We're trying. We're in a cut, baby. Stevia weed gummy bear for the bougiest of bougie people. Stevia gummy bear.

Oh, I can't have that. Weed is getting bougie now, though. I mean, because of all the legalization stuff, the Snoop Dogg brand is fancy. They have ultra premium weed and thousand dollar bongs and every type of food. And 20 years ago, it was just whatever you could get. And maybe you could turn it into hash i don't have my own expertise but i lean on kyle's and he's like yeah you're fucking screaming eagle and purple headed monster or whatever they're all weed to him like he can't tell the difference

he's not even that big into the difference between invicta and steve thank and Indica and Stativa. Thank you. Indica and Stativa. I couldn't not say Stevia and I was stuck on it. If Kyle says they're all pretty similar, he's a subject matter expert. Yeah. We're in the final count here in Missouri.

10 more days and then I can walk right into an open dispensary and get to buy in and I've said one popped up yeah I mean like close to you yes that I am noticing fucking everywhere like now you just I'm just driving around it's like that wasn't there that was a fucking steak and shake and I'd be better I'd prefer that to go back to a steak and shake because like I'd rather have steak and shake than like another weed store but i'm i'm excited for it's going to be fun like just being able to go and buy it and and like missouri top tier one of the coolest states we got the best gun laws

we we look at states like georgia and with pity in our hearts for those fascist gun laws and the fascist weed laws here in missouri we're above it all we have buy yourself a gun and then go you know enjoy legal weed later in the day without the gun you fucking lunatic don't bring the gun but you can do everything the land of freedom i think i think we're going to see a lot of people hopefully i don't want people to move to missouri the way they moved to colorado i don't want that i don't want any fucking like hippie, I don't know, Wisconsinites coming. I don't think that's happening.

Like two thirds of the country has legal weed now. And I'm in the exact opposite. Texas is like quadrupling down and they're arresting college students for having Delta 8 vape pens and hitting them with like drug trafficking charges and crazy stuff like that. Delta 8 is illegal in Texas

and they just enforce it selectively, but it's still on store shelves. That sucks. Then you don't even get Delta eight there. You can, no, you can buy it, but also you can be arrested for being in possession of it.

And recently they've been cracking down on students. Mostly North Carolina is considered the first bill they're going to consider. And like this Congress is medical marijuana and with that i've seen medical marijuana be like new jersey's where it was like if you have this one specific thing that that little girl had then you can get legal weed and there's no stores because they'd all have to cater just to her yeah and i've seen it like california used to have it where they sounded like there were fucking ticket booths on the sidewalk where doctors give you i was there there were it was ludicrous uh so that was basically recreational under the guise of medical i don't know where we'll be on that spectrum but they're going to consider it

once you get medical it's just a stepping stone like you will get to legal eventually once you have that like missouri got medical in like 2017 or some shit and now just a few years later we've got the real thing i don't know what medical gets you because like okay now i have my card hypothetically where do i buy it it's not going to be on every corner like it will when it's legal legal there's gonna be a lot but i guess i'm thinking mostly about california and washington like it was medical but there was still dispensaries with plenty of brands and and uh stuff going on and you the license was not hard to get and they were all over the city it was just legal with extra steps yeah that's how it is in a lot of places we'll see how it lands I don't know anybody who's like super

against it anymore well you should come to Texas boy man 30% of Texans are against legal weed so it's staying illegal because those are 30% magas yay well that sucks what you got

Zach are you here Zach I hope I know you're having an internet. That's the whole weed topic. I'll come up again. If you could open that, Zach. It's picture critical, though. Zach's here, right? You know,

it's hard to say. Zach, can you open that? I'm sure he's working on it. It takes a second. This guy is dating a woman she's he's 26 and she's 23 however she looks like she's what would you call her 11 something like that oh dear and uh people are accusing of being a pedo and he's like dude like this is a real relationship with the 23 year old woman her stunted growth is a side effect of brain cancer treatment that she received as an infant. Her disability made it hard for her to find love.

And he's like, dude, I love her personality. This is a 23 year old woman. Why are you acting like I'm some sort of pedo? And I'm kind of on his side with this. Like one, she has a disability and she's entitled to find love too. Right? Like I would take this chick over a fat one. I mean,

like it was really easy. Like when you were intro in the story to be like, Oh, that's kind of ghoulish. And then when you were like, but she has a brain tumor that forced her like this. And does she not deserve like love or something as an adult and it's like that that's a fucking good point she she is an adult and you

know she had a brain tumor so now she can't date anyone ever like that's pretty fucked up i get i get like the the optics of it like looking at it that especially that paddleboard picture is like okay like some jacked dude and then some little child. I would have said a nine-year-old. Okay. But really, in terms of things that affect her desirability, not as bad as too many donuts, right? Am I alone on this? I mean, you can...

So what's... I think you're alone. Okay, so she's not going to grow. I'm sorry, Taylor, what did you say? Kyle, you're muted,'m sorry Taylor what did you say Kyle you're muted bud what was that you're not going to I think when he's all alone on a little island

oh I tried he's by himself on little St. James I tried to get us past that quickly. Take this woman and stack rank her. How fat would she have to be before she wins out physically over the fat? Like Lizzo? Everyone takes her over. How fat would a chick have to be

before you'd fuck a kid instead? Thank you. That's where this is going. Damn. I know we get wilder in the show and I heard that and I'm like, ooh. Move past that. Bye, y'all too.

Look, look, look. I think that sucks for her. Yeah, it's sad. I think she looked, I think in some of those pictures like specifically the paddle boarding one you can just kind of see like you can't see her face. So, like, I don't know. I bet her face looks more adult in, like, person or, like, in certain lighting.

And, like, her being tiny isn't the problem to me because there's plenty of itty-bitty girls. And there's plenty of, like, relationships with huge size disparities. I remember, like, seeing Shaq with that, I don't know, girlfriend slash wife of his or something and thinking, like, come on, is this a joke thinking like come on it's a joke what if you find the tiniest girl you could sex with her must be like a puppet act like dude every night you're committing a war crime against she's hyping herself up in the bathroom for every time. Come on! He's got NBA money! He's doing smelling salts

to take that cock. He's gonna get me the finest electric wheelchair. You gotta get so high to get around it. To jump on top of Shaq? Jesus Christ. Yeah. Yeah, so that guy's getting a bunch of hate, I suppose.

Well, don't post your shit on social media, bro. That's step one, right? I shouldn't be able to see your paddleboarding photo with your little nymph of a wife or whatever she is. When I could see her face, I could tell she wasn't a child. Yeah, agreed. She had adult creases.

Not trying to be mean. She's got a TV show. I don't care about any of this anymore. She has a TV show? Yeah, she bitch got a TV show. I don't care about any of this anymore. She has a TV show? Yeah, she's got a TV show. I don't care anymore. Once you get a TV show, you're a little pussy big bean. But imagine you're like a waiter, right?

Imagine you're at IHOP. And this guy sits down with a little girl. It's late. You're not paying much attention. You think it's a dad and his daughter, right? And they sit there and then you look over and they're like making out and you haven't had time to like... When's the last time you saw a couple make out at dinner?

Yeah. If you go to IHOP after 1 a.m., you're going to see all sorts of shit, especially at Waffle House. You don't want to speak up in a 1 a.m. IHOP. You'll be killed. You keep he's piped down in there, white boy. Yeah.

Allow the IHOP patrons to do... Pancakes will beat your ass. Oh, I've seen those. IHOP is equally scary. Look, everybody's going to talk about the Waffle House experience. I have seen some crazy... I think I saw a video where there was a shooting in an IHOP. Maybe it killed the guy.

Show the fuck with me! Show the fuck with me over my pancakes! And it's like, dude's dead at IHOP. I've seen some Waffle House beatdowns. The greatest Waffle House clip ever, though. Some crazy fucker was living in the roof of a Waffle House. What? Simultaneously, a patron or an employee was recording, I think, because the ceiling was a little bulging.

And then this cocksucker fell off onto somebody's, like, Grand Slam breakfast. And then had to make a mad dash for it, because he'd been outed as the scary man who lived in the ceiling. Don't miss out on Denny's. Wild stuff happens at Denny's or Huddle House, for those of you in the South. Huddle House.

I haven't heard of that, but Denny's is a classic. So there are Huddle Houses here. I've gone to them before like when when waffle house isn't an option in hartwell georgia that there is no waffle house uh there's only huddle house you got to slide on over to livonia if you if you want that waffle house and those delicious scrambled eggs but every now and then you can't make that little drive you just having a rough night so you don't um so i've had some huddle house before it's not great not great but it's it's you know they're doing their best to copy waffle house that should say all you need to hear

oh they they're not up to snuff are we gonna catch up to those genius i think i might have told this story on pka before so you guys can stop me uh but when i went to denny's here in Plano, Texas one time, we found a couple of, they were obviously fraudsters performing some sort of remote exorcism via FaceTime and pretending that they were in an office. And anytime the waitress would come by, they'd quickly hit mute so the client couldn't hear them. But the ceiling was mostly what was in view because the phone was low angle. And it was hilarious. I stayed extra just to sit there and listen to all the nonsense it was all the old huckster stuff of like cold reading clearly catholic woman super worked up yeah as

soon as the you send the money on paypal or whatever we'll start the ritual it was the i got a real kick out of it i got a whole show with my dinner and it was great i'd love to get some rituals in my life i don't have any i feel like that exorcism is just as legit as any other exorcism i want to i want an old white guy there you know what's even better though like like when you see an old black priest like like i'm like that guy's a real believer because you know how they are in those those countries right there and and he's stuck with he's like a he's like a black belt priest when When I see a black priest, I want to see Samuel L. Jackson play a priest and I want him to exorcise black demons specifically. I want to watch that movie. Oh, I did have an idea for a TV show.

Pretty much. I had a really stupid idea for a TV show. I enjoy a lot of our sponsors' drugs and sometimes I come up with these ideas, but i thought for some reason you know how like they're busting all those people from the january 6th stuff it's like every week they're like sending people away for half a decade the one guy i think his sentencing guideline was 12 to 18 months roughly and he was like no way i'm i'm gonna try a jury and the jury game like four and a half years so they're all going away for and i was thinking like if you knew someone who was there and you could turn them in but you weren't gonna

like you'd have a lot of leverage over that person and i kind of want to see a tv show about that where like you like make the person be your butler like or something silly like oh my god like like and anytime they're like i'm not doing the dishes he's like oh what was miss pelosi's number again all right all right but could you at least pre-wash them yeah you know maybe they have that really i want to see that play out as a sitcom he's a january 6th like writer and he's got to keep i love it i love it he has to work and put the make the poor guy wear a little maid outfit while he scrubs the dishes. Oh, you don't like it. We

can send you to prison. That's a different show. There was one recently that that guy who put his feet on Pelosi's desk and wrote her some like I think he called her a bitch and in writing so that when she came back to the desk, you'd find the note. He had a plea deal of five years. They turn it down taking his chances which I had a plea deal of five years and he turned it

down taking his chances which i might have too right like five years is a lot that'll alter your life um and it's coming back and now he's facing 30 it's not locked in yet and i'm like i don't know what to think about that it's complicated for me 30 years seems like a really long time yeah but it was a coup attempt to overthrow the government and you know somebody died and like well i get that it had all the i guess if it's a duck you know quack like a duck you know walk like a duck all that i guess i get why you call it a coup but it's almost giving them too much credit in order to hit them with the maximum penalties, right? Calling it a coup.

Because when I think coup, I think that the minister of defense has been getting all the generals together. And he's been putting a word in their ear like, look, the supreme leader is not so supreme these days. He's a fucking combo meal at best. We got to talk about this. Like, look, I've talked to the transportation secretary. these days he's fucking combo meal at best we got to talk about this and like like like look and i've talked to the transportation secretary he's uh he's open to some of our ideas if we put 40 united that's a coup that's when i get the key holders in line and then i walk in the room and take out el presidente myself and i walk out of that room and i say i've i have freed our people

liberty and then I take over. Then the same fucking building with the same fucking rules and laws and guns and shit. That's a coup. What those jackasses did was go MTV redneck on that big white building that I'm supposed to respect.

Storm Congress building. They were looking for Mike Tence. Big white building. They were looking for Mike Tence. They were looking for Mike Tence. They were looking for Nancy Pelosi. They were chanting they were going to kill her. I don't know what would have happened if they actually found those people. They would have killed those people.

100% chance. And it would have been Republicans too. They were people out there hunting for Ted Cruz and all sorts of people. I agree with you. The coup I I think, was on the like the government end of it and less on the redneck storming the Capitol end with all the fake electors. And from what I read of the January 6th report, the biggest brained idea I saw is I'm sure most of you are familiar with the fact that they organized fake electors and tried

to send people to Washington saying they were the electors for Arizona or Nevada or whatever when they were not. And that's illegal. And the idea was that they would do that and get all these fake electors into the electoral count and force Mike Pence to say that there is fraud here and we have to stop the count, which would then bump the timeline further for more election shenanigans. That doesn't seem like it would work. What were they going to show up and be like, I'm the Arizona elector. And they're like, all right,

Mr. Stevens, can I just see that ID? And they're like, fuck. Yeah. It's about, well,

it was like the Arizona government is actually Republican. And if they had been in the bag for Trump and hired their own electors, then they would have voted for Trump in the electoral count and he would have won. But it turned out that none of the governments, even Georgia and Arizona and like the Republican ones went for that scheme of alternative kind of fake elect. Yeah.

A lot of turns out a lot of them actually are like decent Americans who are are like no i'm not going to throw away the constitution and make donald trump our emperor uh fuck you but but amongst that list of decent americans doesn't include donald trump no it doesn't because he's a winner okay at all costs touche yeah mostly a winner the greatest winner of all time look look how. We always talk about how many shots Michael Jordan missed and blah, blah, blah. We're mad because Donald didn't win every time. How many times do we have to get to the moon?

He tried one time and didn't make it. Nobody's ragging on Apollo 13, are they? Do they swing that all the time? His picks didn't win the midterms. How the asshole would do that? You didn't even make it that time. His pics didn't win the midterms. How the asshole would do that? You barely, you didn't even make it that time. Yeah, and those pictures suck. Yeah, but I went.

I went. Yeah, going back you know, very soon. I'll believe that when I see it. I won't believe it when I see it. I don't know who's been. You know what? I'm sold. I'm in, I'm in. I'm in.

Somebody's been funding the shit out of NASA because they've got a legitimate moon plan in order. Is there a timeline? A broad one. There is, but I don't know off the top of my head. It's like an Elon Musk timeline. NASA does that shit too. We'll be on Mars.

We found an organism on Mars you remember that big news story you've been razzing NASA over that for half a decade it's such a big deal you don't even like aliens I would if they were cool

they're not going to be cool they're going to be microbes there was life outside the planet that would fuck up everything imagine every religious organization cool, they're going to be microbes. You're going to be like Big Whoop. Then you're right. There was life outside the planet, Taylor. Oh, but dude, that would fuck up everything. Imagine every religious organization finding out, oh, there's alien life. I looked up the moon timeline

and it's fucking hilarious. We're going to send people around the moon, and I believe I'm on this, no earlier than 2024. Nice. That's embarrassing. That is embarrassing.

We're talking about 2023 right now. But no earlier is not a timeline. If they said no later than 2024, I'd be impressed. They said, I promise you it will be after 2024. It could be 3024. That man keeps his word. He does. Technically correct. The best time of correct.

You want more liars in the government? I'm not going to vote for that one. Fucking El Presidente. No, thank you. I like NASA's attitude of honesty and upfrontness. And I can't wait until they take that sort of

spirit to the moon again. Again. No earlier than 2024, they'll go around the moon it says that's the second mission the third one will put people on the moon so cool i'm just making shit up we're talking like 2030 ish it is we went there let's do a bet let's do a bet let's do a bet i'll bet that pays off in 2030? No, because I think it's going to happen sooner. I bet a million dollars. One million dollars.

Yeah, I'll take any amount of money that NASA's not on the fucking moon in 2026. Any amount. Dealer's choice. I think I'm with Taylor on this one. I'll give you odds. You think that they didn't do it for a half century, and then they're like,

oh, fuck, we forgot to carry the one. You're giving me almost four years. You're giving them almost four years. I will bet you my entire net worth, hundreds of dollars. Alright, then that's the bet. You get the accountants

working. Because that is binding. You know what's funny? This happens and Kyle takes me to court, makes me destitute. It's an oral contract and you've got it recorded. He takes both your dogs. I was joking. Jewish accountants, Taylor.

Your entire net worth. Clothes right off your back. I want your shoes too. Yeah. I'll hire my own Jews. They make the best attorneys. That's who you want to hire. Everyone knows that. They don right off your back. I want your shoes too. I'll hire my own Jews. They make the best attorneys. That's who you want to hire. Everyone knows that. They don't fight each other. You know better than that.

You'll have to get a Romanian at best. You won't be able to find a real one. Dude, if I have to hire a Romanian attorney and you've got a team of Jewish guys, I'm going to go to Guantanamo Bay for welching on a bat, like, because my fucking Romanian guy is going to be like, so I do this. I do get green card. It's like, fuck man. Come on. Like start treating this.

Like it's real. Like Kyle shows up with this team of professional looking suits, immaculately groomed. And your lawyer is like this slightly overweight guy that walks in with pants that are too big, the spenders, you know, a little tie that's too little for the big body. Yeah, no, no. Well, not the skinhead. He's got like the three, like Homer Simpson hairs going over, not covering the bald spot at all. Glasses are greasy. And you're like, yep, this was a, what was it? This is small claims court, but I'm going to prison. And Kyle walks in with seven five-foot-four men, and I'm like, oh! Oh!

I'm going to jail! No! No! He's anti-Semitic! He's anti-Semitic! I love Israel. I wore my Israel t-shirt. That'd be so funny.

Actually, not really. It'd ruin my life to be sued for the moon landing. Did you see the Memphis cops that beat that man to death? Is there a video yet? I know of this story. The video's coming soon. They said the video's real bad. So they beat a black man to death. Thankfully for the city of Memphis,

all five officers are like Wesley Snipes Black. There ain't a light-skinned man in the bunch. Have you been to Memphis? Look, I'm just saying, all five officers in the clear as far as my people are concerned on this one. So apparently the charges came down today against the five officers. my people are concerned on this one. All right. So they apparently the charges came down today against the five officers

and they were varied. It seemed like one of a couple of them were like improper procedure is all they were going to get. But then the one cop was getting like second degree homicide

or maybe and then another one was getting some form of kidnapping. It was very odd charges. They had clearly spent some time figuring out exactly how they were going to charge each officer, and some of them are getting it way worse than others. I got to see the video. I mean, I don't really want to because presumably it's a man being beaten to death,

but if you're going to stand somewhere on the topic, I guess you need to see what happened. It'll be out soon. Public freak out. They always get it. So stand by. The former officers, then it names all five, have each been charged with second degree murder, aggravated assault, two charges of aggravated kidnapping, two charges of official misconduct, and one charge of official oppression. I don't even know some of these charges but i looked it up because i read all of them in charge of murder and that turns out to be on

target second degree murder it's so weird i saw a picture of each man with his charges oh you know what it was it was a list of all the if they're all being charged equally then what i mistook for a charge per man was the list of charges that all the men were getting, maybe. And I think that because I think the charges were listed in a in like a graph across from the men's names. And I guess I never presumed that they're all just getting the exact same charges. OK, OK. I want to see the video. I might have my own opinions on their level of.

Yeah, like like if if you beat a man to death and i stand by and do nothing i'm not innocent but i'm also not as guilty i think so yeah i'd like to be hands-on to be culpable on all those charges you've got to be like i guess none of them was a superior officer i'm guessing literally that none of them was the superior since they're all being charged like this you would think normally there'd be, Oh yeah. Sergeant major general Peterson. He's getting the, the,

the bulk of the charges and the enlisted men below him. They're, they're, they're, they're skating away. Cause, cause they, they were just following orders or whatever the fuck.

What did the cops say? I ain't said shit. Cause their lawyers are telling them not to say shit. Good lawyers. Ah, well, I was looking at one of their YouTube channels, and look, he's denying all this.

He says it's big government coming down on him and his black brother. What's up, guys? Naughty Cop here. A little bit of hot water. Naughty Cop 2898.

Seal Clever 101 here. Naughty cop 1488 here. Alright. On that note, I think it is time for me to go. I got some other stuff to do. I'll be open and honest about it. Tonight is date night and guys in my condition do not get around a whole lot, so that is not an opportunity that I'm going to do. I'll be open and honest about it. Tonight is date night and guys in my condition do not

get around a whole lot, so that is not an opportunity that I'm going to miss. And before I bounce, I want to tell the people listening at home to check your vitamin levels B1 if you have weird, mysterious problems that you don't understand or don't make any sense because as I've discovered, it can affect about

47 different things and kill you if you have a weird problem that makes no sense, just Google it. If it seems to make sense, take a cheap $10 vitamin. Might save your life. There you go. So if you have these symptoms, take Drifter's advice. I'm really glad you're doing a lot better, man. It seems like you have a good outlook on this, so I'm glad to hear it.

Yeah, there's plenty of B vitamins in Lock and Load. I'll tell you that right now. A decent cum supplement would have saved all your problems. Maybe. No, I'm putting my USA seal of approval on that. The United States of Armenia approved.

You're going to cum so much you won't be able to be depressed. That's right. The hat man will fear you. Thank you so much, Drifter. Take care, man. See you. Yeah. Good luck.

Good luck, you noble young man. I hope he's at the base of this this time. I do have my own concerns. It's the fourth time he's solved this problem, but hopefully this is the last time he solves it. He seems more sure about the solution this time than he did before. Maybe that's me.

That's good, right? I was surprised that when he finally got out of that bed, I was like, you can get up? I didn't know that was an option. You can only get up during dates. That was a stylistic choice. It's like a

Swiss Casey hand cam. I think he explained it to his last time i'm sure why he's like laying in fucking bed but like we just didn't even ask this time i don't think any of us really remember exactly and like now that we know it's a vitamin deficiency why the fuck's he still laying in bed you know like like and like i don't know shit but i'd figure you could eat some fruit get a b12 shot or whatever and you'd be good to go I bet you know, I think you only get B vitamins if B1 would fix it, imagine what a B12 will do, Taylor

I don't think you know your vitamins Taylor, did you go to school? B1, we moved on to B12 and you're still talking about B1 B1, the lamest of B vitamins everyone knows it that's why it got ranked 1 or the lowest

I don't know if it's B vitamins we've moved on one or the lowest it's like i don't know we've moved on to 12 others it's like star wars now i was uh i was watching uh last of us obviously because it's a tremendous show two thumbs up so far really like it i agree and i hadn't had hbo for quite a while because i just didn't use it and so i regot it for last of us and i was scrolling through their catalog trying to find something other than Band of Brothers to watch because that show is fucking sick. And I saw this show Succession. That's about like a big media business magnate who is like in the fucking preview. So it's not a big spoiler.

He has a stroke, like a mental you know lapse as a stroke and goes in the hospital and then it's like you know he his kids trying to fight over the succession of this big powerful media company and it has brian cox in it who i love i really like that actor that older actor he's great and so he was the reason he was on the cover and i'm like oh fuck yeah like this guy i'm checking this out. And the idea of it is awesome. But it is, and it's HBO. Keep in mind, this is HBO, not AMC, not something else. It is the worst dialogue I've ever experienced in an HBO show.

And there is no close second. It is jarring, jarring how these people talk to each other. It is not even vaguely reminiscent of the way people communicate. I'm going to do an example of dialogue of what is literally on this show. Watch it and I'll prove you right. Oh, fuck you. Oh, go fuck yourself.

You just fucked mom. Oh, yeah, I would fuck mom if she wasn't fucking dead. You fucking cunt. Fuck you. Yeah, fuck yourself. Any two characters could be that the whole show is pithy banter with no depth between characters that reveals no subtext no nothing i think it's really highly regarded it is and it's shocking because it is the worst dialogue it is jarring

how unnaturally these people communicate and the fact that there is no differentiation between the sons and the sister and the way that they communicate is jarring. Like what I just did there, that over-the-top fuck you, like, pithy banter. Like Gilmore Girls, but hateful? That's a perfect example. It is almost as bad as Gilmore Girls.

You can watch the actors about to say their thing. I just wish they were topless during their little banter. It would have been a better shot. I love Gilmore Girls even more. With a little nipple fucking tweak. Oh yeah? Blah blah blah. Tweak! Oh really? Blah blah blah.

Tweak! Fuck, I love Gilmore Girls. Just jagging off. And so like, maybe you would like this, but like it's awful. It's the dialogue is, and I'm trying to like it so hard. I'm six episodes in.

I really want to like it because I want a new cool show. It is impossible to be invested in these characters at all. They're not only unlikable, which would be fine. There's Ramsey, Joffrey, but they're uninteresting.

We're seven hours into the series and they haven't revealed even an onion layer beneath their pithy banter. This is succession. It's really, really rough, the dialogue. It's one of those shows that as you're watching it, there may as well be a small caption at the bottom that says, You are watching TV. You are watching TV.

This is a show. Don't get too invested. You've seen Boardwalk Empire, right? Oh, that show's way better than that. That show's cool. Yeah, yeah. Boardwalk is amazing. I think season one of Boardwalk is its best season. seen boardwalk empire right right oh that shows way better than that that shows cool yeah yeah boardwalk is amazing i think season one of boardwalk is its best season that but the the richard harrow character is one of my favorite characters from like all of everything how many

men have you killed i've stopped counting yeah that guy's awesome there's a scene where he like storms that fucking mansion at the very end to save that little kid and he's got three guns with him he's got a like a six shooter revolver he's got a 12 gauge shotgun on a sling and he's got his uh his like bolt action sniper rifle and he just walks in to like the gang hideout yeah and he just start he doesn't say shit he starts killing like immediately dead dead dead and they're running and he's like can't run from this dead dead and one of them tries to pull out a gun he's like oh i've got a second gun here shotgun dead dead dead and then he's walking up a staircase with a bolt action clickety click clickety click all the way to the top to get the kid that is such a hardcore fucking character he's a world hardcore fucking character. He's a

World War I sniper who's been shot in the face. Half his face is shot away, so he's wearing this little thing on his face. I can't remember what the word is. It's a mask or a prosthetic? Like a prosthetic half-face mask thing that looks very unnatural.

I think it's a little bit opera-ish. Yes, and he's such a great wonderful character that he makes that show after what happens at the end of season one i won't spoil it for anyone who might want to watch it because it's a great show succession is nothing like that so don't yeah that's a shame because i want a new show too um i'm thinking about going in and i'm thinking about re-watching the wire thinking about going back into into the wire and trying to, I don't know, view it from a different lens. I watched a YouTube video recently that sort of breaks the wire down. You know why every season is important to the wire.

And it was interesting to view it all from like instead of each season individually to view them as this bigger thing and how each piece fits together. So I might watch that again. I don't know what I want to watch, though. I'm out. I'm out again. I just finished 1883, which takes me to the end of the finished Yellowstone content. We watched all of Yellowstone in 1883, and then there's another one called 1923. It's just still going out.

It comes back in February, so I haven't seen that yet. I liked 1883 more than yellowstone yellowstone has started to really suck and i feel like people aren't shitting on it as much as they should yellowstone's regarded as this good show but it's not it's not the relationship The relationship between Jamie and Beth is horrific for not enough reason. They take up the reason three seasons in, which is total bullshit.

I don't think that was planned from the start because it doesn't all fit together. Jamie has no idea why she's mad at him. He's like, if you want to hit me so you don't hate yourself, then that's fine. I'll take it. Meanwhile, he got her a hysterectomy or something. By the way,

this is a very feminine woman. A woman with big old jugs and great butt and the whole thing. From the neck down, she's smoking. She has a hysterectomy? 20 years ago, she wouldn't look like that. That's not at all what she would look like.

I don't know. Yellowstone has no no plot the guy that makes the show mike sheridan kyle do you know who he is in the show yes oh i didn't know he was in the show i know that mike sheridan if he's if he's who you're talking about if he's the creator he has an empire that you might not be fully aware of how how wide it spreads so obviously there's i don't want to like take you off the rails here but see there's the sylvester stallone show you know that you probably know of um and then there's also the jeremy renner show those are all i think in that same like universe of that guy he has all he runs all those shows as well as the yellowstone renner show um he's the guy with the legs now right the guy with busted up legs well i don't know if they we'll see he's hawkeye let's just call him that's nice to say he's really bad let's be nice no cats um so there's mike sheridan in the show do you know the cowboy that is the badass fucking most

handsome cowboy he's always so proud of himself doing that fucking spin move and the dialogue is like watch out for mike sheridan he fucks every chick from texas to montana they all love him he's so fucking handsome and incredible that's how he writes himself into the show and then he shows up you don't know mike you're gonna know as soon as you see he does that fucking spin move on the horse he's always doing the he's the best trick cowboy winning all the oh okay he writes himself into the show no is he the one where they show up this is taylor they play this stupid fucking game that i'm pretty sure they made up for the show where they like run their horses as fast as they can and then pull them to a complete stop as fast as they can so they like fucking slide that's like really good

for horses yeah that's totally what ranchers would do like you'd like to use your horses I think it's some kind of a game that like rich cowboys play or maybe they made it a rodeo event I thought Taylor might know no no that's not a rodeo event I don't think you're supposed to

gallop a horse and then like demand it to stop as fast as possible it's not good for it zach zach help us out we're not cowboys and uh and so if he's the guy who's like the hot shot at that who like could have taken the other guy's life but was like hey kid don't worry about all that you don't owe me all that money if he's that guy come on he is kind of the big dick swing and he's cool he's got good looking he like clearly is the richest guy there like except for maybe kevin costa except kevin costner's got a whole problem with his empire this other guy seems to be having a problem like he's up here on vacation because everything's fine back home in texas that's kind of my point he writes himself in as the coolest richest best

cowboy awesome guy every fucking girl wishes they he would better you know like like he's always like a better businessman than kevin costner horse trading them and whatever and like like i don't know i just feel like if i wrote my own show and introduced myself in it not like stan lee did you know where he's like working the retail counter but instead as the guy superman wishes he was that's what sheridan does and then he did it in 1883 as well he's he's in that show you'll recognize the character if i get his picture and uh he's like one of the traders or something and he walks in there and like delivers wisdom that sam elliott doesn't have and i'm like dude you it bugs me like like he's and soon he's gonna like fuck all the main characters you know

like beth is gonna leave rip for him because he always makes himself yeah that's mike sheridan he's like tarantino always making sure he's in the scenes where the actresses don't have shoes on like just happenstance he's always there when that happens that's when he takes his cameos what what does CR stand for? Where do you see it? I see the state of Texas within the sea. And the sea looks very reminiscent of a horseshoe, obviously. But what is CR? Something ranch.

It's cool branding. It's cool literal branding, Alma. I like that. Is that not the name of their ranch? The Christian Ranch? I don't know. I bet he sells his fucking shirt. He's not from the 4- sixes i i'm a little mixed

up actually look at his collar right there man i like that hat dude oh my gosh i am ready to fucking invest in some cowgirl ranch wear or something because like every time i look at the show i'm like kevin cosner's jacket is the bomb and and the the weather changes so he has a different jacket like every episode yeah damn right he does and i love them all every time they're dressed is that oh it's just a brand cr ranch wear okay well i like his hat more than that i looked up what they're wearing it's called i messed up the name it's not cardhart very often it's like fillmore or philtmore or something like that. I want to see Woody shirtless on a horse like Putin.

Yes. Dude, that's your Christmas card. Imagine how great that would be to send to all. I would frame that. I would frame something like that. Do you remember I had... Man, this wouldn't play now. Do you remember many years ago I had photoshopped picture of me as Vladimir Putin I put on my Tinder? That would not fly.

Like nuke my DMs, bitch. So many girls would play along with that. Yeah, it'd be great. The fun ones would. Yeah, I'm fucking right up your Crimea. Get a joke right up your Crimea. Yeah, you can have a lot of fun with

that people are people have a good sense of humor about that on this side of the world like it's it's only over like if you go over to maybe fucking poland and try to pick up somebody with some poop humor you might get yeah i mean that ukraine stuff is like me hearing that like sam and frodo are struggling in near ribbondale it's not real for you at all it's not even vaguely real i'm not even sure europe exists i've never seen it you ever heard the way that they that every one of those countries talks made all jokes aside i'll just say about like you're not maybe not really existing like who's to say that any of us exist you might just be the one guy here and and because of the way time dilation works it either perceived or real time dilation it doesn't matter which

your whole life your whole existence could have just been this little where somebody booted the pc on so it just like ran all the memory real quick and you're just that you're just that your little flash of energy that ran through the circuit boards real quick and and everything is it's real that thing about europe exists i hope so i've had that thought too you know i've been to europe a couple of times but am i sure i have right like i wasn't watching the whole time they could have taken the plane in great big circles landed me not too far away from home and told me you've stirred a memory i went there by plane i went back by boat and they could have still fooled me. I don't know.

He's circling over the great lakes. I forgot to write this down in my, in my stone journal the other day. So there's this British reality show from, I don't know when the early two thousands or whatever. And what they did is they ran a national contest. This is not long after like virgin and other people started going to space. And by going to space i mean like you

know they go to the upper atmosphere look around and come back um so they announced we're sending i remember how it was four to eight brits to fucking space you're going up and we're gonna and they're gonna have a reality show to fucking pick the the person we're gonna go through astronaut training and that's part of the show and they do they have this national fucking thing just like american idol where they get all these people together and they boil it down to the best of them and they uh they put them in and the plane to fly to russia to do their training it's it's partnered with the russian government like a lot of that stuff was back then you could pay the russians like 20 mil and they'll take you up to mir to the space station

or whatever well they put them in the plane and then it circles around the uk for about six hours and then they landed them at a at a base you've probably seen if you've seen any action movies before it was in the rock it's where they stole the vx from it's this impressive military base they train in over in the uk and they shoot a lot of movies there well they land them there complete with russian guards and dogs barking and then they train them up to be astronauts for a few weeks or months or so you know silly stuff's mixed in though and they're always like why do we have us learning this this is silly this doesn't make sense it might be a gag oh that guy gets voted right off or whatever mind mindset on the show so then they're like all right just uh

they bring a scientist in and he explains to him how uh once you understand gravity you can control it because we've got to explain why when we get to space they're not going to be there's still going to be gravity right because we can't fix that so long story short they fake take these brits to outer fucking space eventually in a fake spaceship and they think they're in a fake spaceship up in space and then one of them's like i don't know about all this do you think we're really in space and they're like of course we're really in space, you nit. Oh, harumph, harumph. You need a couple plants in there. Dude, it was so fucking good.

They tricked those people into thinking they were in. I can't remember the name of it, but if you search British fake space show, I'm sure you'll nail it. That's hysterical. I had never heard of it until I watched some YouTube video about it the other day, and I was dying laughing watching the clips of them like training to be astronauts and like just just them buying

when the scientists like pointed at like a chalkboard and explained how there would be how they could control gravity and they had like a gravity generator it's called space cadet space cadets that's a great that's a good name retired yeah wow yeah yeah maybe that's the new show for me maybe i'll watch space cadets yeah i'll you know that sounds infinitely better than succession i'm gonna watch space cadets i tried like it is a show you know when you watch a show and you sincerely really try to like it like I I found myself in like episode five doing that thing where I'm like this is fucking stupid no no like come come on it's got Brian Cox in it like keep watching it and it was last night I finished

episode six and I'm like there's this is not good this is I just a bad dialogue. All right, so maybe there's a show on Hulu called The Old Man, and that's pretty good. I only got three or four episodes into it, and I got sidetracked, but not because it wasn't good, just because I got sidetracked. Oh, Jeff Bridges, I love him. Jeff Bridges is a star. He's on the screen 80% of the time, and the villain is... John Lithgow?

John Lithgow. I love him too. This is great. Yeah, it's pretty good. He's got these two, uh, Rottweilers who are like his super duper trained,

like loving companions. And, uh, there's a scene, a couple episodes in where somebody gets the best of him. They, they, they kidnap him or whatever.

And, he's in the backseat all handcuffed up. Well, somehow or another, he like manipulates and kicks the guy in the fucking truck wrecks and they've had this ridiculous fight where he's fighting handcuffed and he's like 75 so it's it's not going his way but he's still like this really well-trained old man and he's got a six-pack by the way jeff bridges has a six-pack somehow he's like 70s man he looks strong and uh and like finally it's like shit jeff just

got his ass whooped and the guy's like are we done and the rottweilers show up they've been running the whole time they've been running the whole time because this guy's been drove away with jeff bridges they've been chasing the dust to that car for 20 fucking minutes and they just caught up they're ready to kill yeah Yeah, ready to kill. Yeah, it's great. I was enjoying the show thoroughly until... I got sidetracked by something. I can't remember what.

I want more voice acting, like cool Warhammer videos of those Ogryn. Oh, I got to email that guy back. Yeah, I got to email that guy back. Oh, we do. Yeah. Yeah, I think he wanted me to do the voice video but i was like taylor's the voice guy that like couldn't get involved with this thing uh i don't know what he would want us to do or anything but that would be neat that'd

be neat i'm i love that warhammer 40k stuff and i'm i'm super psyched for whatever they end up doing over at uh amazon dude i'd be nervous to do actual voice acting why he's gonna give you something to read in some context it'd be really yeah but like you want it to be not nervous no it'll be fun like a fun thing it'd be like damn like i'm like doing a voice for a video like that so that'd be neat it's just a youtube video but like that's still kind of cool you know what i mean yeah i i do enjoy his production value it's it'd be fun to to do something like that possible yeah i'll email him back. Have you guys watched Euphoria?

You're talking about shows you tried to like. No, you're back on the child point again. Is that HBO? Yeah, it's HBO. I scrolled past it. It looked like a tween show or a teen show. Is it not? It's a super popular show.

Kyle's acting like it's a weird thing to watch, but it was a big deal. It's our demo, man. I don't think it's a super popular show kyle's acting like it's a weird thing to watch but it was like a big deal it's our demo man i don't think it's for us maybe i'm wrong is it like a high school drama it's i would it's a it's high schoolers having sex explicitly in every episode dude there is too much happening in every episode i'm capped in like this move too slowly. Nothing happened in the last hour. Like that's a complaint that I often have about slowly developing shows. Euphoria is like six episodes packed into every hour. It's way too much.

Nothing seems to, everything is so consequential that nothing's consequential. Everyone's almost always dying. Everyone's going to rehab. Everyone's breaking up. Everyone like, yeah. I don't want to say sexual assault but it's like sexual assault adjacent or maybe even literally and uh like every

fucking episode it's not like oh do you remember two years ago that thing happened and they're you know traumatized from it no that thing has happened like six times this year and it's it's hard to get into are you over it now like you're like it's just too much fuck this i'm definitely not even looking or caring about what comes next i'm not sure but if a new season came out i might be curious enough to know if they righted the ship okay yeah well i'll have to keep looking on hbo for something better otherwise i'll just end up re-watching the original band of brothers which is a great thing to re-watch it's tremendous i love band of brothers i i'm sorry i super loved it when it came out but when i watch it now i'm like oh you know what it turns out that a lot of this

isn't the part that I loved about it. Like, I want to say there are eight episodes and the last two are kind of not World War Two anymore. And the first two are kind of not World War Two. They're like training and we're getting to know the integrity of Captain Winters and stuff like that. And I'm like, oh, when you get back to it, there's really just two or three great episodes some of the greatest tv ever made in band of brothers and a whole lot of other stuff i'm okay with the beginning i do agree the end it really you know at the end of any story can at the end of the lord of the rings it was like felt good to wrap up and give everybody they're just

you know whatever they needed but in this it's like come on let's kill some more nazis like just a few more we can find some that won't surrender that like that's what i want i wanted to be like hey wait they say there's some nazis up north that don't want to surrender they say hitler's still alive right gotta kill the last episode is about like i don't know soldiers getting excited and having car accidents or something. If Band of Brothers were made today, after its huge success, they'd be like,

look, we need a season two. How about they go to Brazil and look for Hitler? That would be awful. They did a season two, and it was Japan. Captain Winters,

the whole... Like, honestly, with the Band of Brothers thing, it's... I'm surprising you both like have that same take like i i actually i disagree with woody on the beginning part i really like when they're like kind of five miles up five miles down uh or ross from friends and and lieutenant winners like i really liked that development because it showed them like growing as a group but you are right like the end of the series it it's almost like after they're in Hitler's hideout,

the Eagle's Nest or whatever it's called, from there on, it's kind of like, okay, we're kind of meandering now. Whereas I think the end of the Pacific one is the one part that's better than the original because the end of the Pacific one, the guy goes back and it's like really hammers home

like how he's a totally different guy. Like he's changed. He's fucked up now. He will never be able to even engage with people who didn't experience that in a way that's real because they can't possibly empathize with what he's been through. And that was the Pacific series,

which overall still solid, not as good. I don't like the Pacific. I dislike the Pacific. I made it through it once and every time I've tried afterwards, through like and that was the pacific series which overall still solid not as good i just like the pacific i i made it through it once and uh every time i've tried afterwards i always end up going oh yeah i don't like this i don't really like this this isn't fun at all this is like about the horrors of war uh i i want to see like like come on give me a little bit of that john wayne shit everybody now wants to be anti-war fuck you you. No. Give me that John Wayne shit. Give me the sad ending if you want,

but I want to have some hoorah, blow up the bridge, and fucking Tom Hanks shooting at the tank, and then the fucking bombers come in. I want some happiness. I want some good times too. It doesn't have to be a drag. They did make the Japs way scarier than the Nazis as far as the implication of like

you don't want to get captured by these japanese they'll saw your hands off and fucking inject shit in like like they no i think that's the case the stakes seem like i think that if the germans took you captured like whenever i'll say this whenever i see a movie of a german prison camp and there's some americans in, they're like sassing the commandant and like wearing a leather jacket or something. And the commandant is like, I will only let you go so far, my Kruger. And it's like, dude,

the guy's got like doo-wop hair over there and a leather jacket on. How much farther are you going to let it? It always seems like it's not so bad in the nazi prison camps for the americans they're like shot down for the soldiers yeah yeah the soldiers you did the you know the pure ones but but on the other hand like i feel like the japanese were just real awful awful pieces of shit you know i they're just just scum scum yeah i was watching a great thing about the Japanese Zero today and about how technologically advanced it was for its time.

The kill ratio was 12 to 1 in the Pacific. Weren't they mostly just crashing it? No, no, no, no. That's at the very end of the war. At the end of the war when they didn't have any other way of... It was the last resort sort of thing. The Japanese Zero outperformed everything it fought in the Pacific with a kill ratio of 12

to 1 in the early years. No. Yes. The Air Force manual said to go to high altitude, to do a passing run on them, and then to go as fast and low as you could to escape or you will die

because they could not fight them at all they would lose every dog fight at a ratio of 12 to 1 yes i had no idea we were getting wrecked it was so much better than anything the world had ever seen the reports that came out of china because the war began for the japanese began there were that they were just shitting on them and everybody in the west thought it was just exaggerations. They're like, yeah, the Chinese have biplanes. Of course they're getting shit on. But no, when they started fighting, they were getting destroyed. It was only after they captured a zero

and they were able to understand how it was made and the things it was sacrificing to do all the things that I'm describing, to be so maneuverable, to have a 500-mile range, I think. It was sacrificing a lot. It didn't have any armor. all the things that I'm describing to be so maneuverable to have a 500 mile range. I think, um, it was sacrificing a lot. It hadn't, it didn't have any armor. Uh,

it was like a millimeter thick, the, the outside skin. It was just too quick to hit for, for the guys. It was too maneuverable and it weighed like 2000 pounds less than in the American plane. That was his counterpart.

So it could just outmaneuver them at a, at low speeds. So the doctor to one, that is that's a horrible ratio yeah that's that's not good that's for the first we were losing that bad for years yeah damn i i never in the air huh well yeah that's important on the pacific i suppose that was mostly carrier battles, but there were sinking ships too with other kinds of aircraft. No, it was really

interesting because I think Howard Hughes, the piece of shit that he was, was like, clearly it's a stolen design of the Howard Hughes speed craft that I designed, of course. Finally, they captured one. Because the Japanese doctrine was, if

your plane is going down, it should go down as hard as possible. It should be destroyed. If you can, burn it. The thing that sparked the whole Japanese internment camp movement, the case they used, was where after Pearl Harbor, one of those planes crashed on one of the islands. The way news went in those days, the locals didn't the locals didn't immediately know that there was a world war two had begun and about Pearl Harbor. But long story short,

some Japanese natives on that Island allowed that pilot to escape custody, burn his plane and, um, shoot a couple of the natives there injuring them and in the whole process. And so they use that Japanese couple as the scapegoat, if you will, for the whole Japanese internment camp thing. Um,

but yeah, they finally captured one and they saw how that one, like a single hit would destroy it. That's just a lucky hit would. And they also saw that, I guess it wasn't very maneuverable at high speeds cause it didn't have any hydraulics. It was,

uh, you know, sacrificing that. What did the Americans in their existing planes do? Because they couldn't just be like, all right, shoot more accurately. Did they have to immediately go back to the drawing board, design a new plane kind of like the Zero, and then put the Americans in there?

Well, they had to change their tactics right away. Like I said, they could fly at a high... The Japanese Zero could climb to 33,000 feet or so, 34,000, 10,000 meters, and it could do it extremely fast. The American tactic was to stay high and to do one run as you dove through the Japanese and then flee because their top speed was faster.

If they dogfight, they were just going to die. And later they had better planes. Back in World War II, we were just not the power we are like we were later like we'll see like we were getting owned by the german tanks in europe at the same time right so we had a potential fight with china because i agree with what you're saying like we went in there and we didn't have the technology advantage what we had was a manufacturing advantage yeah and over time we even had a technology advantage i think kyle was about to explain that as the new planes came in

the spitfire etc we were better than the zero and that happened after 1942 like i think better the zero wasn't getting better every year what the zero was was holy shit you were 10 years ahead of your time when it matters you you have peaked on the tech tree in this one little area right when you needed it, and they just shit on the whole world. But the Americans, they weren't just... The Japanese had a system that could produce like 100 good pilots a month or something like that.

They only had 550 total zeros ever, I think, or at their highest number. But because they had that maybe 500-mile range, maybe it was 500 kilometers, really far, they were able to exert their influence on a much larger region with 550 planes than anyone could imagine. So they thought there were thousands of them

because it seemed like there were, and they weren't losing a lot of them either. Yeah. That's really interesting. I'm impressed by your guys' war ii plane knowledge you gave me too much credit i was reading the wikipedia as kyle was saying everything he says is right when you said i think it was after 1942 i was like what like i had known that for seconds before i said it um uh but kyle seemed to know it all anyway um if we were to get into a fight with china would it be the same thing would we walk in there with better tanks better carriers better airplanes and then they would have this manufacturing capability that allows them to do

to us what we did during world war ii i mean they would they would push our if it was a manufacturing battle like they'd push our shit in. It's not even close at this point. We'd have to have a really superior design. I don't think any... I'm sure someone knows, but I don't think that I'm equipped

to even begin to understand what that war would look like. I guess we're fighting over Taiwan, right? So... That's what it is like their backyard backyard oh yeah yeah we're fighting right there with the when the japanese are going to be there in new zealand and australia the the massive pacific fleet um look you know i'm always the guy like going hoorah american power because god we just outspend the rest of y'all tend to want or some shit. I just think we're gonna win.

As long as that dollar is the trading currency of oil. Look, I just think the U.S. is gonna win every time because they outspend so much. I just think that when it comes down to it, our shit'll just be a little better. And there will be more of it. And I don't know

that the war is gonna devolve to that 1950s thing where it's literally factories pumping out we need more planes if we need more planes that's that suggests that we're losing planes that they're losing that we're losing them a huge rate that means we're losing pilots too right like i don't know if that if let's say both sides i don't think either country is set up to train new air forces full of pilots and get their fifth or sixth generation planes pumped out in a timely fashion planes don't work like that well let me ask you if there was a country between the u.s and china that could do that it would would it be the u.s or would it be the country with all the manufacturing and with five times our population what kind of manufacturing

are we talking about taylor we talking about, Taylor? Are we talking about building shitty steel? Are we talking about building Chinese cars? Are we talking about building the cutting edge technology that you need to fly under advanced radar systems and deliver laser guided, radar guided bombs precisely and pinpointly to dissolve a country's entire infrastructure? And to add on to what Kyle's saying,

like also this is an environment where we're trying to invent new shit, not just copy what America did five years ago. Yeah, but I mean, the idea that we, that the U.S. even has the option to, like, vaporize China's manufacturing districts. Like, they would do the same thing the Germans did and change and just constantly be switching

fucking machineries and shit in all these normal-ass manufacturing plants. Like, they can't outproduce us in a way that we can't anymore. It goes back to what my question was. Military equipment. What kind? Tanks, planes. Any of that shit they can do faster than us.

It may not be as good. I'm just saying they absolutely can. And the US depends on China's exports a hell of a lot more than China depends on the US's imports. Which means that the US has a vested interest in not destroying the entire manufacturing economy of China. Well, I think both sides have economic worries if

they go to war with one another. I think it'd be a massive global event far beyond the military might of it all. But I don't know what that war even looks like. I don't think anyone... I think we all... You see what's happening in Ukraine, right? Nobody knew what that war even looks like. I don't think anyone... You see what's happening in Ukraine, right? Nobody knew what that war would look like.

It turns out it looks like 21st century World War I all over again. They're in fucking trenches in the snow out there. I thought Ukraine was going to lose their stay. They lost the Kiev airport for a few hours. Do you remember that? Yeah, yeah. I thought it was over with that. You know what?

I bet that's a whole fucking movie. I bet the siege and then retaking of that airport is a whole fucking diehard-esque movie. Because what it sounds like happened is the Russians landed fucking paratroopers in their capital, captured their airport with what I can only imagine were the

baddest James Bond... Skeleton crew. Sylvester Stallone, cocksuckers Russia can muster with their night vision on and their fucking hex grid armors or whatever like landed at the airport took that shit and there were some ukrainians somewhere that got a phone call and they said hey the fucking spetsnaz just took our airport the country could fall within hours they're here for the president and they said all right we're on the fucking way i want to know that guy's story like he hopped in the truck with his gun and killed those people.

Yeah. That would be cool. The seals come out of the back. Maybe like give them sardines. I got those metal teeth like uh like like dude has like jaws yeah yeah maybe maybe i'm oh or no i think most people agree with this i uh i put a lot more i guess respect on china than than russia as far as like oh yeah capacity and shit like i feel like russia isn't at all equivalent to china maybe i'm like being silly i think russia's been a third rate power for a long time i think i think that's being exposed right now china's real deal have you

seen the fucking shit they have their kids doing in school they're all fit they're bouncing basketballs in sync no michael jackson dance they're thrilling all over the chinese i see that as propaganda you know like like i dude i bet i bet if you showed a bunch of chinese podcasters who were like normally censored and had never seen it before i bet that you showed them the fucking crowd at uga when they start throwing up the letters to spell words out and told them that this was our students and that

what they're spelling was death to China. They'd be fucking scared if they saw 85,000 people fucking spelling shit. Little do they know, they're spelling go dogs. They couldn't give a fuck less oh we eat dogs

oh we eat we hate dogs we come to America we gonna eat all your dogs we conquer you and then we make you watch we eat your dog the whole football team scared like is that about us if the ATF was watch when we eat your dog. The whole football team's scared. It's not about us. When we do get conquered, I was joking.

I was joking about that, guys. Fellas, when we get conquered. Are you worried about upsetting our five Chinese viewers who are using a VPN? Oh, this is the final straw. I'll start reading that like, what was that that massacre they had the man

the the um tiananmen square yeah i'll start reading the tiananmen square wiki get y'all all fucking locked out although i would never do that just to a poor chinese viewer because they'll they'll get you or i guess not reading it but they can't look it up i i haven't seen the video but somebody was saying that in rust um they were dealing with chinese hackers and they're outside their vase like screaming in chinese and they just started reading that that uh that that whole wikipedia article yeah that's like bad mojo over there you know you're gonna be talking about all that that that shit didn't even happen as far as they're concerned that's like voldemort's name and the n-word mixed together yeah it's too it's powerful it's too powerful and no word should have that sort of power no no i always did you

know i've done that joke before it's not funny anymore doesn't that suck when you're like like what do you do a joke and you're like i've done this fuck that's not funny woody uh you said i don't know if you want you said that wings was texting or calling you today and you did you ever get back to him back and forth so he texted me last night but it was really late like i didn't catch it until just before bedtime so i was like i won't call now it's 11 30 turns out that would have been a good time to call yeah i hit him up this morning and i'm like hey it's now a good time to talk. Yeah. I hit him up this morning and I'm like, hey, it's now a good time to talk. But he didn't get back to me like 530 tonight. He had just woken up.

And I don't know. Like I had to have dinner. I had a video meeting and then the show. And I was like, I don't have time to fit in a wings call. So I don't even know what the agenda is or the topic. He just said he needed to talk. So I hope he's all right so when you when you messaged me that that like oh man i need to get back to wings blah blah blah um i just went

on youtube and searched wings redemption and like the the newest stuff seemed to be that he lost his psn account again and uh whether it was like a realistic concern or not, he seemed to be concerned that I guess they had contacted his local sheriff's department and let him know that he had talked about possessing CP before. And it's sort of a jokey kind of way. And maybe they need to look into that. And so he was worried, as he put it, that they were going to come and like take all of his shit. So and, you know, which would be his all of his shit. So, and you know, which would be his streaming set up and everything. And,

uh, and you know, you don't get that shit back. You know, when they take that shit, they've taken phones from you, not for that, but for ATL.

Oh yeah. Yeah. They've taken all sorts of stuff. Like I lost a gaming PC for a while. I had to go pick it up in a federal building. Really? Yeah. They had my,

I like wheeled it out in a cart from like an area like upper level why didn't they take it from you was it it was on the explosives charges when they like came and tested that car i had blown up for for what it was was they they they came and they thought i was using high explosives in my videos. And I really wish someone had said, hey, what are you using? And I've been like, oh man, it's Tannerite. And you do this to it a little bit.

And man, it looks good. And if you do this, then it looks like this. And it's pretty basic stuff that's all legal. And instead, they thought I was using DebtCourt or TNT or something. And so they confiscated all my um tannerite dan tanner would send me like packages uh that weren't like civilian packages or i don't i don't know why like uh like they ordered yeah he's sending me stuff which is a little bit different than sending you stuff not only do i have all the licenses in place but yeah ask questions it's the same stuff it's the quantity that's different am i right yeah and the packaging so like the individual packaging that he would normally

send things out is meant for a to be safe for a consumer meanwhile he knows what i'm doing with it i'm blowing a whole fucking nissan altima with it or some shit so he just sends me a big barrel of stuff right it's only up and up but like they took that and then they took the car remember the car that i took from jeremy took back from jeremy and blew up because he he had to hot rod my actual target vehicle and got that gas yeah the gas can't the gas tank like stirs up this dirt goes in the the uh the fuel filters car stops working i'm like all right jeremy that car of mine that you've been driving around for months, basically making your car,

give it back. It's got to go. It was a, a pathfinder. So yeah, they took that. Is that the one whose door flew towards you? No,

that was just a pickup truck. Oh, yeah. That I don't really, I think it was a Ford. The one with square body Fords. Maybe I had a combination of you're right and I'm wrong and it came out as I'm right.

That's not what I was going for. I don't know. I'll agree. I'll agree. But yeah, when they finally gave me all my shit back or whatever, it was just a cart full of electronics.

Because they don't really... I think what the warrants will often say, it won't be like iPad in the dining room. It'll be like anything with a screen. It's like, dude, that navigation system is one of the dumb ones. It's one of the old ones that just goes from point A to point B. Your toaster oven

has a countdown. This will be coming with me. We're going to need your Samsung fridge. It's like, fuck! Yeah. If they were to take his shit away, it'd put him out of business for a considerable amount of time. Wouldn't be good. I don't know what he's been up to.

He usually knows how to kick the bee's nest and get things all stirred up for himself so who knows maybe he did that but uh maybe he'll get in touch with you and give you the the inside scoop i'm always interested for some reason i can't help it sometimes when it's interesting i'm interested when it's just his general like perpetual nihilistic sort of depressed funk it's like dude as someone who's been as low as him he should be able to appreciate the medium high moments like my my little prison experience has made me appreciate every fucking

day man i'll wake i fell down those stairs today i bet a lot of people would have been bummed out after that i was thinking man stairs in prison are so much worse to fall down stairs in prison are made out of fucking metal or concrete, if you're lucky. If you're lucky, you fall down concrete stairs in prison. Concrete gives a little. You're going to tear all your back skin off. Concrete's not sharp, at least.

It's just rough. I'd rather fall down rough than sharp. There's a big difference. Anytime I'm a little bummed out, I think about, like, sure is better than fighting with Parker over the fucking channel on ESPN ain't it though because Parker would have beat you

to death. It's great that you have that sense of perspective still of just like yeah. So I mean you're six, two, three something like that. I'm sure there were people in prison you could beat up. I don't know how to fight man. Like I mean i know how to fight but when's the last time i like somebody in there's

50 and six inches shorter than you would you want to fight that guy okay well i mean look there were people in there i could have beaten up especially if i like attacked them i suppose you know but but like that doesn't like make make you any less scared because the people that i'm gonna have an issue with first of all it would be even scarier if someone i thought i could beat up was trying to give me a hard time because now what is what does he know that i don't willie this little motherfucker this little joe pesci piece of shit is pressing me want my fucking ramen noodles and that's which I know I can't fucking give him.

I give them to him in a heartbeat in the real world because I don't fucking value them. And I don't value them here either. But I know I can't give Joe my fucking noodles. But am I going to deck him right here? I know I can. But why is he so confident that he thinks he can take my fucking noodles? He must know something I don't. He must know there's three or four big fuckers behind him who are going to come grab me.

He's like, is this Joe Pesci, the eye eater? Like, who is this guy? I don't. He must know there's three or four big fuckers behind him who are going to come grab me. He's like, is this Joe Pesci, the eye eater? Like, who is this guy? I don't know. Any of that shit is scary. So, the idea of a big guy being threatening, it's like, okay, I understand him. I understand him. Even if you just stomp the little guy and win in the short term, now what?

60 days turns into 180? Maybe. Maybe. I don't know. Maybe they, my guess would be they'd put me in the short term now what 60 days turns into 180 maybe maybe i don't know maybe they my guess would be they'd put me in the hole like all right if i assaulted someone that'd be charges that'd be like charges like if i if i just wanted to if i was some retard who went to that silly billy prison that i went to and i was like i'm gonna i'm gonna cream somebody on day one let them know that i don't take no shit if i had one in there and like cream some 58 year old tat when he wasn't fucking like hit him in the temple when he wasn't looking like pissed on him like i'm a fucking brother i'm in here for tax

fraud yeah i'm like i'm like my name's my one of them dude they'd hit you with charges and like you'd be up at a scarier place where like they they have to repeat for real like so no i i don't know man the whole thing was fucking scary it didn't matter who was like bothering you or why they were bothering you it was gonna be to be scary because, like I said, I don't know. You're in an alien world. I'm here for 60 days. Some of these people have been living in here for decades. I can't even think of them as normal people.

I just tried to smile as much as, well, maybe not smile, but prison smile as much as I could and be happy. Prison smile is you just sort of bend over and present? No, this is it. This is a prison smile. They call it winking your asshole. What I mean is I wouldn't full-blown smile because somebody would be like, what you smiling at?

You know, but let them know that What you smiling at? It's not nothing. Dude, that could totally happen. what you trying to do oh it's not nothing dude that could totally happen you know so but you don't want to be mean mugging nobody neither you don't be like hard looking like

all brow furrowed and like frowny like then you kind of come across like you're trying to make them break like their gaze and you don't want to look them in the eyes really anyway you glance at them in the eyes and then you like go about your shit right you're trying to make them break their gaze and you don't want to look them in the eyes really anyway. You glance at them in the eyes and then you go about your shit. You're trying to do some animal body language shit to let them know you're not a pussy or

an asshole. I'm just here to be one of the herd, bro. I'm just moving from point A to point B and then I'll be point C as soon as possible. You want to give that up. Or I did. That seems like the high iq maneuver my name's big rig mccoy and i'm here to take over like and i'm the premier rapist in this

establishment dude but no i would be i would rather give somebody a hard look than a smile it honestly like like like like what the fuck you like like a big goofy grin at a motherfucker that you don't know i don't know what i don't know how they might take that but if you got gave a hard look they might be like damn dude's having a bad day i know how first day is first day's no fun yeah it's like no i'm autistic and it's like man this motherfucker says he's autistic too. Beat him up. I don't like the way that you're branded as first day, right? I don't know.

Maybe you're wearing the wrong color jumpsuit. You don't have your flip-flops yet. You've got noob written all over your RPG character. Yeah. Oh, you do. No, you walk in there with your shit in your hands just like in the movies and TV shows. You got that big care box full of horse

shit from the government right you know you got your goddamn pencils and erasers and shit and you got your rolled up mat the best one they could find you got your shit and so like there it's clear you're moving in like you see somebody new in the pod like you know or the dormitory you know like never seen him before you get to the point where you know everybody in there maybe not their full name but like you know to call them spiff or fucking buck or fucking dude or whatever the fuck you know and like oh new guy okay everybody takes notice that somebody's new so yeah you know and if they are dressed weird or like something i don't know you guys should take note of that i wasn't there uh were there were there emo kids was there like a clique of emo and goth kids and uh or prisoners were there like i'm so over this prison no no uh the

whiteys uh were in the minority big time and uh and we didn't have a lot of uh room for expression i think you'll find in certain scenarios that the blends of each race sort of tone down to like, oh yeah, he's a white guy. There's no emos or goths or rednecks. What if I go in wearing a bandana and I really maintain this?

I think in some prisons they would kill you. I think where I was, they would probably send you to the doctor or something, but it'd be a while before he saw you yeah were there old guys how did that yeah yeah there was a couple there was one guy that was just so old and i don't remember what he'd done but i remember thinking it wasn't bad enough that he should still be in there like maybe 75 85 like i'm thinking of my future right like at 55 is he just like you know that guy's just not part of the game.

We let the 25. Well, there wasn't there wasn't any game per se and where I was anyway. Like the only as far as that went, the closest thing to anything like that that I saw. I mean, obviously there's people selling things and gambling, but that's just like imagine high school again when maybe some kid is selling fucking gum or something like like hustling a little bit. And some and some other kids are playing poker in the in the gym it's more like that than some organized crime conspiracy you know it's just guys having fun uh and and the only like real game i saw was like the people in the like laundry or the kitchen would sell shit you know like the physical dominant hierarchy is what i was trying

to describe like i didn't see anybody really getting pressed or like anything like that really it was just that that a couple scary moments that i had that weren't too fun i i didn't see anybody like intimidate and really intimidating anyone there was that one dumbass that kept flashing is like drugs and uh and paraphernalia and they sent him to the hole but uh but he was honestly my high school sounds rougher than that well i don't think it was well i mean i mean where to god if you looked at someone for more than like three seconds you would they would hit you they would fight you they would like i mean people would get robbed and you couldn't really do anything about it because what are

you gonna do like like like the the white guys would get robbed if they didn't lock them you know that was one of those things that i was scared about that it was it became a thing that like uh um snow solved for me when i was like nah i can't go out and walk today and uh my my mexican cellmate explained to him in spanish that kyle's afraid to go outside because he doesn't have a lock for his locker and he's afraid that someone will hide their drugs in his locker or just rob him and either he's going to lose his shit or be framed and Snow's like

yeah there's a good chance that could happen yo yeah those seem like a good place to hide some shit yeah nobody's going to be there but he goes and he got me a fucking lock and he wrote down a little piece of paper, the fucking combination. Like I was a child,

told me not to lose the fucking combination. A little piece of paper and everything. He's like, memorize it. If you lose that, I'm gonna rape you. Just kidding, bro. Just kidding. Just kidding, bro. Where's that piece of paper? Just kidding, bro. Just kidding.

He hooked me up with a lock and that was a that was one of the nicer things he did other than that meal he made me on my last day what a nice guy snow was it seems like someone who's caught up in a corrupt system let's get no i've been wondering about snow he murdered two gang members he he told me about it i don't believe he told me snow did pull-ups with rocks attached to him does that ring a bell so he had um the laundry net with the the fucking uh the the medicine ball things in there yeah do you have any idea how much weight he added to his pull-ups if it was medicine balls you could i would guess 30 or 40, something like that.

You know, but he wasn't doing a lot. And he was not overweight. He wasn't doing a ton of them. He was just doing, he would do sets. He would do like, it's hard to remember, but because I wasn't doing them. I remember thinking like, that's silly. Like, no thanks. I'm just, I'll just walk.

I would stand there and like, wait for him to do his shit. That was before you really got into fitness. Like yeah i had no interest in doing that but anyway um i don't know maybe six or eight or something and then he'd like we'd do another lap and then he'd just keep repeating that i bet i could do i think i think probably i mean this he wasn't a superhuman or anything he was was just snow. Yeah. But I mean, pull-ups with 40 pounds. That's no joke. I mean, this is a man who didn't have access to protein.

And he was... Yeah. That's true. He wasn't even hitting his macros, and he was still shredded. I don't think he was shredded. He was built, perhaps? He was a scary guy. Just a real scary, large enough fellow. Like when you see someone with gang tattoos that have been blacked over like a real life sensor like just a brick over

his yeah they just blacked over like huge swaths that seems so much harder than just getting rid of it or no i guess i guess it wouldn't be i don't turn him into a puma. I didn't. You don't ask things like that. He volunteers far too much information anyway. Far too much information. He clearly liked you a lot. Now it's part of the show. He liked your company. He enjoyed

hanging out with you. He was talking about some sort of drug gang shit and then being a little vague about that but kind of be like, you know I did what I had to do I put my work in you know and it's like fuck dude Kanye style like I don't want to say

like what I murdered him yeah he's being ridiculous and then I say what kind of person he's Jewish that may go down as one of the funniest clips of all time yeah that Kanye clip I swear to god it's like it's like they're in his ear with his kid with a gun to the kid's head and he's like trying

to dance around it because he doesn't want to completely ruin his life he's like i don't want to say what kind of person and the guy's in his ear say it say exactly what kind of fucking person is or fucking north by southwest is gonna get it he's like and in his head he's like it was a jewish person the guy's like that's right it was now keep it was a jewish person yeah you couldn't have written a skit better than that than then his delivery in that line yeah yeah it's comedy fucking gold jerry it's hilarious gold jerry go you're gonna use that ovaltine bit jerry yeah do you think do you think less of uh do you think less of jerry because of his his young girlfriend can we get a picture of her zach can we get a picture of jerry and his

17 year old at maybe at the time girlfriend legal and at the time he was making seinfeld and that is a tremendous actually piece of cultural art Seinfeld is if you want to I haven't watched it I should have and done my due diligence but the quality was so poor but you can go back and find Seinfeld doing stand up in 1990

about his 17 year old girlfriend and that doesn't age well I'm told everyone's saying it's inappropriate i say fuck you what are you gonna do about it try and stop me billionaire now right jerry seinfeld am i right wow he's a billionaire can you blame him and at the time he was just having a fun time. She might be chronologically 17, but biologically she's 21. She looks 21.

I can see why she's on his arm. She's on his arm because he's well, I mean, the thing he should be most ashamed of is how much he single-handedly ruined a lot of scenes with Kramer and George through his bad acting, and that's his largest crime, far and away

her hair is so fantastic you think that's like 90s hair big 90s hair I like that hair I really do I do like the big 90s hair when you go back to like Star Trek remember like Beverly had that big like she's she'll be well there's

no good pictures of her like she's one of those ugly Irish broads, all rosy, all rosacea'd out and fucking pale as fuck. Anyway, I have this mental version of her that's attractive and she has... I have this false memory of

Beverly Crusher in which she's attractive. But no, she had that big red hair, though. I like the big hair. Not like Peggy. Remember Peggy from Married with Children? The crazy? had that big red hair, though. I like the big hair. Not like Peggy. Remember Peggy from Married with Children? The crazy? Not that big. Al, let's have sex.

Like that shit. That's a good picture of her. Nice job, Zach. You nailed it. This is prime Beverly Crusher. It was all downhill from here. That's some pretty good hair. I like that hair.

It looks like it has a lot of vitamins in it. Yeah, I think we're on the same thing. It has body to it. A lot of red hair is stupid. All right, now show me the picture of her. This is what you Google. You Google Crusher and Troy stretching. Show me that picture.

So this is a really good episode. In this episode, they're stretching each other out in this like 1990s leotard shit that chicks for some reason they need to bring that back yoga pants are like so close like leggings like bring this look back to this this crazy like outside thong thong outside your underwear like the uh the american gladiators outfit kind of a little bit you'll see um and uh look at this look at this they're like stretching each other out now the beauty is when you watch this in hd because i can see pussy lips in this definition you can you can see some some pretty good camel toe in in this episode and also in the episode where wharf gets some pussy later on uh i can't remember the name of that one but yeah

they're they're stretching out right now talking about how limber they are after she got fucked by her grandma's ghost lover. I don't like that. Yeah, see, Beverly got raped by the ghost that used to fuck her grandma. And she really enjoyed it. Raping from beyond the grave? No, no, no. The ghost is like,

ooh, I'm gonna fuck you you like that kind of ghost like like comes in remember that scene where in ghostbusters where dan akroyd gets blown by the ghost exactly like that but on a woman um and and she's all like oh like all tingly and shit because she hasn't been touched in a coon's age right because her husband died in some sort of war or something and picard is so afraid of sticking his dick in his friends fucking his dead friend's wife that he just can't fucking do it so little picard stays in his pants and beverly is just cooming so hard when she just gets that it's that ghost ectoplasm in her and uh and that's just a real episode none of what i've said is crazy how some of this shit can be real.

There's a – Walking Dead, I know it's not your favorite show, but there's a character named Abraham, his girlfriend Rosita, and then Elliot, I think. These names are like 80% right. Anyway, Elliot is this weird, like, autistic guy with long hair who speaks in a really funny, pseudo-intelligent way, socially inept. When they introduce us to those characters we find out that elliot frequently likes to watch the other two fuck he's a voyeur and the other two

are fully aware of it and it's kind of their kink to fuck in front of him and it's like this is walking dead oh okay here's the couch sex scene where elliot jerks off behind a fucking bookshelf watching these two fuck and then he gets caught by a fourth character and he explains yeah they know they know they're like yeah we know i do not remember this part of wagon dead where there was an exhibitionist and a voyeur that meshed I'm a hundred percent right. And I'm not exaggerating. I believe you. It's just, yeah.

Especially in the apocalypse. I think, look after the zombie apocalypse, I think I'll be a lot more supportive of any sort of choices. Anybody wants to be make right. Cause the pussy's dried up. Me and Scott used to talk about this in the, when we sat there at 17 and 18 and we watched,

um, um, the day watched the Dawn of the Dead, the Zack Snyder one, they go in the mall, Ving Rhames, pump shotguns and fast zombies. For the first time that I'd ever seen, it was the fast zombies. And we started like, you know, I grew up with guns and shit. So it was like, oh, my God, if zombies came, it'd be the best thing ever. And so we'd fantasize about what we do in the zombie world and stuff. And we kind of run through it.

Well, I want to stockpile this much of this. And yeah, we need powdered milk, Scott, powdered milk, or whatever I came up with. And I just remember thinking, like, there's going to be no pussy. There's going to be no pussy at all. And I used to joke around about, I have to get some zombie pussy, Scott. I have to get some zombie pussy. And that was the joke. Obviously, you wouldn't fuck a zombie pussy, Scott. I have to get some zombie pussy. And that was the joke.

Obviously, you wouldn't fuck a zombie. Of course not. That'd be your test. You'd get some awful dick rot or something, for sure. You'd catch it. But the whole point is, you've got to be a little bit open-minded, I think, after the zombie apocalypse,

because your choices are going to be precious for you. I'm with you. I get what you're saying. We'd get gay. If you need to. But moreover get what you're saying we'd get gay if you need to but moreover like if you're like you know wanting to watch me get on you know with somebody it's like dude

what are we going to do lock the door and leave him outside like come on we all live together now just three of us it's not like he wants to get involved or something let him watch yeah dude in a just a little gaming news in the last fucking minute of the show that only like have you guys ever played games that became cross-platform and then you got like

all excited to play like noobs on things yeah i guess that's an experience i've never really had that much but and as you know i've been playing age of empires 2 a bunch which funny has a bigger player base than their new game and because it's it's classic every rts is based off of it and they on on tuesday are releasing this rts game on xbox and it's cross platform and so i am saving up till tuesday and then i'm jumping in the ranked ladder to try and like finally start seeing how decent i am i'm one and one on the ranked ladder i'm not i'm not good and so but i'm i'm gonna trash these xbox kits there's no way that i can compete with these that they can compete with me with like i got bad keyboard micro i could be wrong about this

but i would guess that what that it's going on like the um the xbox marketplace which can be utilized through the pc it's just another way to get your games right like no it's not it's controller it's controller you can either hook up and play it on the controller but like i play my x i buy games through the xbox system as an app on my pc and play them on my pc specifically cross-platform games like a sea of thieves. Yeah. It's similar. Like what you're saying is true.

Like you can hook up a keyboard and mouse to your Xbox, but the vast majority of Xbox gamers aren't, aren't you get on Xbox live on your PC is what I'm saying. Yeah. Xbox is an emulator that runs on a PC. Yes. Maybe I apologize for not like framing this the correct way. So they spent a huge amount of time

making this game playable on controller they're trying to reach controller people and it's an rts game and which means you have to move villagers and shit constantly you always are managing and i saw that they like simplified it for for console people so you can like hit rb and go to like man-at-arms rush like an infantry rush and they'll just automatically send villagers out to those resources for that to do a small rush the problem with that is that it's no I mean

to say on Xbox prepare for this like but that's going to be worse than an actually managed economy like they're not how can you micro units with a fucking controller on Xbox like so I'm hoping that i'm playing against controller people because frankly all the people who enjoy this game that was remastered after 20 years like three years ago are already on keyboard and mouse like anybody knew they are they're really targeting the xbox controller player and they're putting on

xbox pass or game pass or whatever to try and get as many controller players as possible. And who knows? Maybe the controller auto instructions will be so good I'll get butt-fucked, but I hope not because I want to go on and I want to start winning. Press that trigger to win game. Yeah, press that trigger to win game. Press L to auto-aim your archers. So I know you're into that game right now,

but if you ever try to get over into Warhammer 3 I'll play that with you I can dive deep into that game a modern game that your new PC will power like no other you need a new powerful PC to max that game out Taylor when you zoom all the way in with your

scroll wheel and you look at your group of like orc goblin folk each one maybe not each one but like there's like a dozen different things they'll be doing at an independent time there's like 120 men there these little green fuckers with they're all unique but their battle axes will gleam and glisten and one will be like hey i'm gonna get them with this like different tattoos like one of them will just be freaking out. And they look really detailed. And then you send them forward in the thousands to battle my thousands. That I'll get into.

I'm just about burned out on Tarkov. I think I'm done. I beat it again. I'll jump into Warhammer. I just like. Three weeks. Three weeks. I got level 44, I think.

Like I got everything. I have millions. I can make millions more at the flip of a, I think. I got everything. I have millions. I can make millions more at the flip of a... Past the point of interest almost. I'm done. I beat the game again. They did just improve the game tremendously today with a ton of patches. Woody, they made it.

They reverted the weight and recoil system to back when you liked the game. Like years ago. I played before the weight system, really. And after it. Yeah. So I imagine it's like when the weight system first started. How about the inertia?

I wonder where that is. To experience the inertia, you need to start getting overweight. And they slid the bar over what's considered overweight so far forward it's absurd the penalties for something like wearing a piece of armor i don't know if you ever looked in those negative red numbers but it'll be like 12 movement speed for just wearing some basic level four shit it's like three percent movement speed now like they cut it by by huge swaths the

recoil the vertical recoil they took almost all of it out the m4 is is insane the m4 is insane all the his name's veritas right the veritas he led the charge on this him and trey 24k okay so i watched a veritas video and his videos are so good i'm not sure it's a good business model because it's so hard to make an amazing 45 minute movie about this shit sending a message but my goodness when he comes out with a banger it is as good as any video on youtube on this subject matter and he's taking real life soldiers and showing what they can do and how this video game character can't match a regular guy and he's like you get shot in the leg and like look at this fucking giga chad who's you know got shot in the thigh and was still able to sort of, you know, do way better than your video game character can.

These guys walk 12 miles with this pack on their back. They jog and they occasionally walk and then regain their stamina and get back to their jog. Yet in the video game, you have to lay down in the grass to regain your stamina. They're like like that's not realistic you can regain stamina through walking and uh they're carrying he also knows the weight of the packs which is more and they just made your video game character kind of a pussy he convinced me oh i've always said that like i'm way better at most of the physical things than my character are uh is like like if you if you actually look at how far he's running,

it says in the game, you'll do like two kilometers in a whole raid, but your character's been out of breath multiple times? You kidding me? You knock out 5k every day and you'll get out of breath at the end of it, but you won't

stop running. I would walk as like a cool down like my cardio is kind of shit right now and i can still recover walking you know like they made your character a real vagina to slow progression and and they they reverted not only that stuff but also like some of the other annoying things like your hydration and energy decline that supposedly they reduced that so you don't have to be constantly eating and drinking my character's a fucking Chad his metabolism is like 50 something so he can he can go into a

raid and kill half a dozen people on nothing but like a couple roll aids and some like he can fucking get it done but that making it so the lightweight changes are great like making everyone making the the bar for making you overweight so uh increased it's a great change all by itself the horizontal

recoil is insane because there were only like 10 guns that were usable they were like 10 to 13 guns or something veritas covered that too like he showed people operating these guns and how they could dump a mag into a metal target at like fighting distance now i've operated a fully auto gun but only a little bit and i wasn't as like i'm more like the video game characters but someone who's a trained pmc can dump a mag on target in this game you literally shoot 12 feet over the guy's head like It is very hard to control. Yeah, it's frustrating to see your character not being able to do stuff that not only could I do,

but I have done. I was in a fight with a guy with a Glock, a Filiato one, and when I went to shoot, the Glock went, and I shot the ceiling, and it's like, I've done this shit before. I'd have shot that fucker 28 times in the stomach.

Maybe I don't put them all in a dot, but they're all on him. Remember those turkeys I blew up in Texas? Yeah. It's smaller than him. I would have fucked him up. No, it can be frustrating. But yeah, huge good changes to Tarkov.

But yeah, I think I'm done with it. I'm moving on to something else. You're done with Tarkov? Yeah, yeah. It's beaten. It with it. You're done with Tarkov? Yeah, it's beaten. It could not stand before me. I'll get Warhammer 3. That would be fun to play. I'll get that. I have it. I bought it the other day.

I played one game of it. Didn't really have anybody to play with so I didn't play anymore. How much money do you have in Tarkov? Like 10 million right now or something. I'm just gliding. Yep. I made that 10 million right now or something i'm just gliding yep yep yeah but but like i'll i made that 10 million in a day though because i spent all my money to buy the sniper levels it cost five and a half million and i was like bummed i was like down to so so little money i couldn't insure my gear and uh and i made like 10 million a day just just running my scav and I go into factory and go straight out the door

so it's like a free 150,000 just every 15 minutes. I used to do that but I get my free scav kill. If you're a scav in this game, as you know, the first scav doesn't try to kill you so I'd shoot a scav in the head, take his stuff and run out the door

and then I'd just leave with two scav loots, mine and his. Yeah, that'd be a huge mistake these days with the scav karma system. They won't let you scav as the head, take his stuff, and run out the door. And then I just leave with two scav loots, mine and his. Yeah, that'd be a huge mistake these days with the scav karma system. They won't let you scav as much now. Your scav karma goes down, now it's 20 minutes, 30 minutes, an hour. They just don't let you play anymore. Which is good. It's a fun mechanic.

Alright, what's four hours and nine minutes? Time flies when you're having fun gentlemen I'm gonna go eat and enjoy the evening PKN 632 watch the last of us