Painkiller Already - PKA 636 W/ Josh Fluke: Role Playing With Your Throat, Trust Issues With Everyone, Patreon AMA Questions

Episode Date: February 25, 2023

pka 636 with our guest joshua fluke taylor this episode of pka bought to you by real dbg.com i think i said does it bought to you by restart the restart the whole show no no no guys i'll quit by real dbg.com and also by blue chew the finest uh erection quality supplements out there brought to you by this podcast josh fluke thank you for joining us thanks for taking the time what's new in your world every time i pop over to your channel it seems like you're discovering a whole new thing i mean so lately it's been um there's been a lot of layoffs in tech. So I've been covering that. Looking at those CEOs, it seems like it's a copy paste layoff email to pretty much every company. It's like, we didn't foresee the future.

And it's like, come on, CEO of one of the top tech companies in the world didn't foresee this. You know, so. Probably didn't though, right? That's why they hired him. He didn't hire him just to fire him. He didn't know. He got it wrong. We needed him and then he didn though, right? That's why they hired him. He didn't hire him just to fire him. He didn't know. He got it wrong. We needed him and then he didn't, right? Yeah, I feel like that's a valid business strategy that they would lean into. I've seen it before.

Of who? I'm not following. So like, if they see an opportunity... Treat me like I have no idea what you're talking about all right so if companies see an opportunity that they know is probably limited at least somewhat then they'll lean into that and they most likely know that they're going to have to let some of them go after the the gold rush is over per se and then they act surprised like they didn't know which makes everyone feel better that works there but like i don't know that's just my take so you think they knew going in these is it like a certain company like because i know like twitter instagram they all had big layoffs

yeah so all of all the ones that profited big over the pandemic like amazon was huge everyone's at home just ordering things at home so they ramped up that hiring and then when that was over bye so yeah well amazon's at least like a great service if like instagram and twitter went down that would be and like by down i mean let's say five months i would be so much more upset if amazon went down for five months it's not even a contest it's not even close think about it yeah oh i i don't go to the only twitter i get is like when i'm on reddit and they send me to twitter i'm like why don't you just fucking screenshot it dude i don't go to Twitter. The only Twitter I get is when I'm on Reddit and they send me to Twitter. I'm like, why didn't you just fucking screenshot it, dude? I don't want to go here.

I'm not even signed into the app. It's like, would you like to sign in? Nope. No, this video isn't that funny, guaranteed. I like Twitter for the screenshots of it I get on other websites. That's how I use Twitter most. Yeah, that's how I use Twitter too. Twitter, you should just trust.

Elon Musk bought Twitter and made Twitter the most interesting place on the Internet for a month ish. Maybe Elon Musk was the most interesting man in the world. Might still be, but he's not as interesting as he was when he first got Twitter. When he rolled in there and he had the fucking kitchen sink and he had all this interest and he's talking about who he needs to fire and how he's going to make this site great. I was compelled. Twitter hit all new usage numbers today what is twitter i don't know it's the same as it was years ago right in the last five years has twitter made any changes that caught your attention it's just the blue check mark that you got to pay eight bucks for i think okay i noticed that difference. They brought that back.

They went to 240 characters or 280, whatever that is. Oh, they have a community notes feature. I know nothing about that. What is that? So I glanced at it. I think, to be honest, I didn't check it out too much. I just saw Elon congratulate his team and said great work on the community notes feature

that helps combat misinformation so people can go in there and fact check each other. I don't know. I didn't click on it, but I saw it. I won't click on it either. Sounds boring. Yeah.

I, Taylor brought up a point weeks ago, months ago where he was like, how long is this manufactured Twitter drama going to last? Right. Where Elon just says something kind of hot take to get everyone to talk about him and talk about twitter and be well it didn't last forever twitter is just the usage numbers are down the

engagement is down yeah he'll have a new thing he'll he will like that's his shtick like he'll have another attention grabbing take or thing to rile up a bunch of news stories like i imagine every time it starts to get like like he gets worried he does something like that like oh yeah i need to you know juice the engine a bit could be maybe it's more less tactical than that he got upset that his tweets weren't getting the views that they were before so he calls in his engineers and he goes guys there must be some bug people aren't looking at my tweets as much as they used to. And an engineer brought all this data forward and said, well, you're not as popular as you used to be. Here's the opinions.

Here's the ratios, et cetera. It's working as designed. People just aren't buying what you're selling like they were. And he got fired. He fired him right on the spot. So they brought in other engineers who said, okay, just special for you. You will have your own algorithm that shows your tweets to people beyond what they would have naturally gone viral. Exactly what I would do if I were him.

Look, we're in my house. We're in my house. You signed in? Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. Nice of you to come on in. Have a seat at my table. While you're here, you'll notice that my microphone goes louder than yours.

It's my house. Would you like some ice cream? You're all entitled to have one. Notice I have two. It's my house. I'm okay with that. They made that out to be like, oh, the emperor has no clothes indeed. But everything now is a... He's so disliked that the internet nitpicks so much

that it comes full circle. And I hope it makes people who are kind of in the middle and just don't give a shit be like, wow, y'all are obsessed with this guy, huh? When I see them tracking his playing continuously and 5,000 upvotes, 800 comments, all just, look at him traveling.

Look at him with everything he could ever want. Everything that I want. Today they had this footage of the Cybertruck driving up over a curb onto a grassy hill area to be photographed next to the rest of the lineup. They used some ramps to let it go up

over the concrete curb because it's got so much um um what's that shit ground effects and shit like it's not made to approach like an eight inch curve and go up over it and make or maybe it was just they were just worried about it getting dirty i don't know they threw up some fucking ramps they wheeled it up carefully at the thing for this little photo thing again it's not like everybody's like all right now do a thing. It's like, all right, put it on the hill over there, Mike. And Mike is like, yeah, I'll do it very carefully with your prototype truck, Mr. Man.

And they're like, look at it. It can't even get up over the curb. And it's like, guys, do you think that a four-wheel drive electric vehicle doesn't have enough torque to get up over that curb? Do you really believe that? It's like the Flintstones. They didn't want to damage it in any way. They weren't taking any chances, but the internet is like,

look, if there's anything we know about Teslas, forget about that self-driving stuff, I guess. That's a bad definition, bad way to phrase it. We all know how fast they go. I saw one in China today. The accelerator stuck. It turned into a semi-guided missile okay it can it's just gliding through china like when it went over a hill the front end touched the ground first

skidded and then it landed flat and kept going it was incredible he had a bus you do like i don't follow the musk news as closely but i feel like i see all that dude's tweets because now nowadays you get suggested tweets from people that you follow and he's one of those accounts that like everybody pretty much follows to see what's up and so i feel like you get fed his stuff constantly but if people are actually mad about like the algorithm the truck like are people actually mad about the truck or is is it a meme? Because that's getting mad at seeing a mascot costume at

Disney World. You understand what a prototype is, right? You know that's not really Mickey Mouse. So there's different levels of being mad about something. Sometimes they start a whole group about it, get a hashtag going. This was more like, look at this thing that happened today. It's weak. They got all uh

their panties all bunched up when he told um ukraine they couldn't use his satellites to target russians anymore he was like guys i was i didn't know y'all were using my internet to pinpoint people with vog grenades how many people have you killed using my satellite so far because that's not what i wanted to do like like and again i'm trying to make sure everybody can watch youtube by the way he wasn't by the way you know it was free right he was giving them his service for free no the government was initially was free right and then he was like and then he realized that again that i think the u.s paid him out the nose for that wasn't there google it right now but i want to say united United States is paying him a buck. Do you know about this, Josh? There was a reason he had to stop because his technology was being used for a certain purpose that would make the government add all these extra restrictions. I forget. I read about it on Reddit. Who knows if that's accurate or not.

I believe, depending on the purpose of those drones, it redefines what the government will classify those as like it's not just civilian anymore if you're using those to drop yeah his satellites yeah like maybe the classification of his satellites might change if they're using and they and i'm not it's not like maybe they're using them for targeting it's like they were using them for targeting very effectively and uh and he was just like no i can't i can't do this anymore y'all y'all got to stop killing people with my satellites and i understand that point of view like look we're over here and like i sent them some money there was a there was a cherry where they were like i remember in the early days they showed this bombed out fucking dog shelter and i know that there's like people

in the rubble too but man i did not like the dogs being in the rubble because they didn't get a siren you know they didn't they can't open the door and run. They can't like, oh, I'm heading to Kazakhstan. Things are getting rough around here. They're stuck in that. Yeah, let's send them some money. I sent him $100. Elon Musk, when he makes a little, oh, I feel bad. Let's do a thing. Now people are dead in the hundreds or thousands maybe, or maybe people are alive by the tens of thousands. That's what I always hear that, especially in in the early days the use of his infrastructure was key to them holding the line to be able to communicate back and forth and strategize that defense

could be i looked it up the u.s has paid millions for starlink i can't get a vibe for whether or not that's the going rate is it good here oh it? Oh, it's expensive. I don't know. I wanted to get it for my dad a while back because my dad's still on that fucking satellite shit watching gun smoke over there. Oh, yeah. Is it available everywhere now? I don't think so.

I feel like we would have heard about that. If Skylink. Starlink. Starlink. Is it available where? Do you know what I mean? I was curious if they have it here. Can I turn it on and get some Starlink and how good it is? I don't know about you, but people can. link is it available where do you know me i was curious if they like have it here like can i turn

it on and get some star link and how good i don't know about you but people can like i have friends who just can't wait for it to roll into their area and i know other people who have it and think it's the greatest i have it it's pretty great i'm not using it right now but i have a star link that i take with me um when i go like outside camping or something, the thing is you have to register its location every time you use it. So you can't use it on the go. At least I haven't figured it out. Because first of all, it's attached to your name and address and stuff. And so it knows it's supposed to be there.

And then whenever you take it somewhere else, you have to re-register it. Also, one thing, if you disconnect the service, there was a little disclaimer that said, I might not be able to get it back due to the overwhelming demand. Oh, they'll give it to someone else. But I don't have to give the equipment back, so I just have a Starlink and I don't know. Hopefully, it'll turn back on.

They'll put you back in line. I think that's just their way of saying don't just expect you get right back in if you come back. You might have to wait a day, a week, but I doubt it would be forever like a long period of time I'm interested. They don't want you anymore I saw a simulation showing the number of Starlink satellites. I had no idea Guess how many there are like art first of all, I don't know Zach

Please find how many Starlink satellites are but like if i had guessed i'd have been like i bet he's got like 20 of them up there like all around the world not because i know anything about it but because i'm going off your vibe that number is closer to 90 i'm gonna guess that it's beyond that it's like two because they're too i bet they're super tiny right they're not like i don't imagine they're like they're super tiny, right? They're not like... I don't imagine they're like... They're not huge, are they? I'm going to go an even thousand. I think they're like the size of the back of a truck. Well, I'm already committed to a thousand,

so I guess I'm all stick with that. Like a truck bed. Maybe like 800. Probably closer to there. They're a 3,500. I win by default, honestly. Maybe like 800. Probably closer to there. There are 3,500. I win by default, honestly. I told you. I didn't guess because I saw the graph.

And it was a swarm of them around the Earth. 3,580 small satellites. You can see them? Yeah, at night, if you have a dark sky area, it's not light polluted. You can see them. There's just little trains of lights that go across people post them on like r slash space sometimes it's pretty cool that is pretty cool i had no idea but eventually they're going to get brighter and brighter and more and more of them and then we'll have groups saying an internet at what cost you can't see the night sky and they'll say yeah i can right here online

they are the night you joke but that's a huge concern like the um the the pollution of the the um the space around us but no no all right so not too long ago a supposedly secret russian satellite broke up in the uh in space and broke broke like a thousand pieces those pieces are ranging in size from paint chips to maybe something as big as your monitor right or bigger i'm guessing i'm just saying but all this shit is moving at hyper speeds through the goddamn upper atmosphere and like it it makes the again it's a huge area out there but they just keep doing shit like this oh yeah that area then space travel or or especially like on the civilian side can you imagine a paint chip hitting

you at 17 000 feet per second a paint chip i can't imagine i don't know what that will do but i do know some of the items we're talking about are like bolts like a one inch bolt that maybe you see all the time that thing moving it did you say 17 000 feet per second that's not a speed that i understand but i can tell you if a bolt hit me that would be like a 50 cal or something but faster than a 50 it's a dude if across the room you without a hard hat i went like you go ow that's what a bolt is at seven feet a second haven't there been times where uh they did like a test to see if you like flip a coin off the top of a building to see if it's fatal that's pretty fatal already so like well actually so you've got terminal velocity right it has to

hit a very old so everything accelerates at the same rate in the atmosphere is what is it 9.2 meters squared or something squared anyway but it thinks have terminal velocity because of the air humans terminal velocity is about 150 miles per hour so it doesn't matter how high i drop you from you'll cap out around 150 155 depending on your build and such right it'll vary a little core is the same thing it's going to have sort of a terminal velocity is it and it's not exactly deadly i think mythbusters did a thing um with that because how about it was smart i don't know the answer to every single item but i know when when when you would have a bullet with bullets the the the misunderstanding is people imagine they're shooting straight up and it's kind of like go straight up and then stop and then go bottom up

and fall straight down. You'd have to be fucking Annie Oakley Master Chief to do that shit. What you're actually going to do is shoot at some angle and then the wind is going to catch it as well. It's going to be in a parabolic arc or whatever and it's going to tag somebody five miles

away and kill them because it's carrying a lot of energy when you shoot it at any angle for the duration i've heard that and i'm sure you're right it just doesn't it's not what i expect i would expect like so let's say 90 degrees is perfect right or 180 from the ground um i would think that me eyeballing it doing the best i could would get to like 85 to 90. You know, like in that range. If you're trying to shoot straight up? Yeah.

And it'd probably be okay. I don't know. I don't know. You could do the math. The math is like 80 is not good enough. And I'm like, really? I kind of thought it would be. I don't know how to do the math off the top of my head, but I know it's some equations They figured out a few hundred years ago

And we could just really quickly figure out how many foot pounds of energy that bullets carrying at an 85 degree angle at a 45 ACP leave okay, sir But I bet with fucking smart is what it would come down to but what's really interesting when you're in space and there's no goddamn Atmosphere to slow things down and shit gets up to those crazy crazy scary speeds where a bolt would be like not a 50 cal but maybe an explosion hitting you in the chest it would just be a tremendous amount of power i've seen those like hyper speed videos of like tiny things hitting blocks of steel at those speeds it plows deep into them and makes like craters like a big bullet hit yeah um just because you know mass times what speed velocity youocity. Huge amount of energy being created.

When I said 50 cal, I was talking about just the mass itself. The speed. It would be like a 50 cal traveling five times faster than a 50 cal. It's not good. We need less space litter. If the Russians are the ones causing all of it, then we need

to get them in line with their space litter. That's litter concentration, so more space would do too their space. See, that's a glitter concentration. So more space would do too. That's what space forces' job should be. We learned the other day how they do plastic in the ocean. I bet they're fucking ruining the skies. They are. Did you know that?

Yeah, so China did a huge proportion of the space debris out there is from one Chinese test. Of course. And the test was, can we destroy a satellite? So rather than do it some responsible way where they put it in the like low Earth orbit and they made sure everything would fall to the ground, they put it way up high. They blew it up and it's all still out there. What a bunch of assholes. Like they knew what was going to happen.

They were already in space like they knew the consequences of it falling apart in space you know you're good enough to hit a satellite out of space you're smart enough to know it'll make a mess yeah yeah i don't buy that lapse in judgment i bet if someone wanted someone like india or china or russia that has to take this down or whatever it doesn't support what i said could they ruin space could they launch like lots of missiles into into space with ball bearings like huge amounts of ball bearings and like ruin space effectively for like that's a really good question because my reaction was no space is too big and then i I was like, well, I mean, if they were trying, they could really make it suck, right?

Here's the other thing, and I don't know. They definitely could. So there was initially this idea that, hey, man, y'all are using those Saturn V rockets or whatever they're using to launch these satellites. It's incredibly expensive. Every pound you put up there is costing you like $20,000. Why not a big cannon?

Why not a big cannon? Why not a big cannon to blast them into space? We need some durable satellites. Isn't there one where it flings them into space? That one's pretty cool. At least they're testing it. That's more of a space

trebuchet idea where I've seen simulations of it operating in space, like this arm that's uh it involves like bringing your space you have these these big rotating arms with mass on one end that orbit the earth and they're rotating at very high speeds and you bring your spaceship along you uh attach to the the long arm the and you're flung by that To your destination. It's a tremendous amount of energy for free, you know in that escape velocity This is cool

But the cannon for the satellites was built into the side of a hill because the barrel was so long you couldn't just have the Barrel in the air had to be built underground to support the mass of it But while that turned out not not to maybe work for satellites and their sensitive inner workings if you were just shooting like capsules full of ball bearings that would then release and explode into like the upper um atmosphere like or into space whatever so they would stay up there for a while like wouldn't you just ruin this space travel for every other developed nation i just put the ball bearings over russia i don't see what could go wrong ah they're gonna go everywhere you ever see a snow globe how would you fix that just complete area denial for wherever you wanted it to send up a series of nets here's the thing

though i can't imagine anyone doing that because the world enjoys the wonders of gps and they have for the last 40 or 50 years or whatever it's been it isn't amazing that that we just made that shit free it's like hey world would you like to always know where you are america's your guiding light and we didn't put the stars and stripes on it we didn't put usa on everything that says gps we should have called it usa not gps but how did that happen this is you know This wasn't a cure for polio. I mean, what sort of information could we gain? I would imagine so.

I have some kind of backup. My watch lets me choose whether I want to use just the American ones or the American and the Russian ones. Do you want to use these extra satellites? How do you feel about the quality of service between the two? I don't know. I can't tell.

I just add more satellites to the watch and it still takes forever. I'm not sure. Is it possible that you could set it up and you'd be like, wow, Rush is getting me to the store a little quicker today. Step it up. Rush just wades. I'm fascinated by your watch technology now.

What can your watch do? So it has GPS in it and it can like leave breadcrumbs on the map to where you went and perhaps get you back. Brilliant. It uses the GPS to set the altitude because the altitude is based on the barometer. So as the air pressure goes up and down, the watch can't know that you're not going up and down you have to tell it right now at this i'm at 300 and then for the next few hours it'll be pretty accurate but in three days it'll be kind of inaccurate it doesn't have the barometer in it oh it does no but it does yeah of course it does you need a barometer to have an altimeter but you have to tell it like yeah you're like right now radio thursday at 8 p.m

at thursday at 8 p.m this is what 300 this is the pressure you find at 300 feet above sea level and then tomorrow it'll be like, well, now this is the pressure to above 300 feet above sea level. I love the breadcrumb thing. The GPS can set it. In case you don't know your current altitude where you're standing, the GPS will tell you. I guess what I was... Can you guide

yourself out of the wilderness with it? Would it be like... Obviously, you've got a compass inside of it, I'm sure. Everything's a compass compass it seems like but like does it have any guidance abilities would the arrow just keep could you be like take me home and the arrow always points toward home on your watch so you could just use it that way because yeah which is useful on a paramotor it's i don't have the vision i'm liking that watch i don't have the vision to really like look at a map and also

your tat i'm flying i'm literally flying a lawn chair so like i'm kind of busy right now to stare at the watch for too long and uh so anyway it's really handy to let's price tag on one of those is it about 1400 no uh higher this was like no this is a good one it had the sapphire lens and you know the stealth black whatever and it was like 500. really that's what that's what my luminox costs you know what it does it glows in the dark and it's waterproof real with real radium yeah i don't think they use the real radium anymore no they don't. I've been in... Your wrists hurt? All of the old Russian armor troop carriers that I've been in

and mobile artillery pieces and all that, they use radium for the gauges on the inside. They glow well. When you get in there, it's like a sci-fi movie. First of all, your eyes adjust to the darkness because now you're inside this thing, but all the gauges are this pretty like

green color you know uh like the i'm sure you do like this seems like the kind of youtube video we both watch like the history of the like the women who used to work in watch factories uh so basically they used to paint radium on watch hands manually and women were sitting in these warehouses and if you don't know radium is more radioactive than uranium it's unbelievably radioactive and so they would like use their tongue to straighten out the tip of their paint brush all day

for years and like all of them died of like their jaws falling off and like all their husbands got prostate cancer it was a real mystery yeah aggressive life out of me and just like

back then this one guy who's the lucky dick who got 80s cancer yeah it just made mine enormous like the Hulk! Like, no, no it didn't. You're dying. I want that Marvel superhero. That's how he got his powers.

It's Leukemia Man. He can summon pity in a single bound. In a single fall. Do they phase it out? What do they use now? Because if you've written in older machines like at what point did they realize this is really not good it wouldn't surprise me at all if the russians still use radium it wouldn't surprise me at all if we use radium but the only reason i

would imagine we wouldn't is because we just spend more money and do things like heads up displays and i know the helmet on the see the helmet for the f-22 pilots for the f-35 pilots it's like a quarter million dollars the helmet is this thing is like crafted to fit you that this is your personal handcrafted um like super duper cutting edge piece of technology with all sorts of heads up shit when you're turning your head you're it's got all sorts of actuators and sensors inside of it i think there's tactic tact tactic feedback is that what i'm looking for haptic haptic doesn't it give you a full 360 like uh you can look down and you can see through the through the cockpit yeah yeah that's cool yeah i want to see a demo of that like that

it seems scary i bet that i bet that tech could be integrated into anything though like like if you just wanted that you don't need all the other nonsense that sounds like a 1200 piece of equipment that sounds like some something that's like yeah i put this on and now i i couple it with my iphone and i can just see through my legs if i look down when i'm flying motorcycle helmets have been ruined by tech and it's a bummer. So here's what I mean by that. There've been a few companies who said, hey, we're going to do a better motorcycle helmet. Maybe they have a little map, like a GPS that's in the side of your vision. Maybe it's just augmented, right? Where they have your speed and your tack or

whatever, you know, this like a little extra, a little heads up display. And the companies that do them were all like Kickstarter campaigns that took the money and ran. And it's happened like three times. Now, anytime a helmet tries to, you know, like, hey, we're a new helmet company and we think we can build a better mousetrap. Everyone's like, fuck you.

We don't trust new helmet companies. It sucks because I would love the tech. I think that'd be pretty awesome. I didn't even want Bluetooth in mine i've i've considered a couple times since and i've worn someone else's helmet that had it and man i want to hear everything i want to hear everything like like i just feel like i get paranoid sometimes if i'm at home sitting with like headphones like if i if i can't hear my surroundings like maybe somebody's sneaking up on me like i wouldn't want i wouldn't maybe somebody's sneaking up on me like i

wouldn't want i wouldn't want to go outside put on earmuffs and close my eyes you know and that's what it feels like sometimes that's yeah yeah i'm different so one i'm wearing hearing protection so i can't hear like i i don't trust my ears to sense a car coming through an intersection or something that's got to be visual and, once I have a helmet and hearing protection, might as well pipe some music in there. I don't hear shit anyway. I only ever wear one headset. The whole time I've ever done this show, I only have

one headset. One side of it. I was like, you had a black one. Don't lie to me. No, I did have a different headset. You're technically right. The worst kind of right. If I'm going to be to me yeah no i didn't have a different headset you're right you're technically right the worst kind of right but uh yeah i'll uh if i'm gonna be riding for longer than just a few minutes i'll put i'll just put some earplugs in i've wondered if some sort of active ear pro might be like the way to go there something that could block out the motorcycle um but give me um like a clear version

of like the road around me because again i'm my my fear is that i'm not hearing a horn that's just a little bit far away that's warning me no brakes or like big emergency around the corner or something like that like i'm gonna hear the guy right behind me going i'm hitting you i'm hitting you and i'll know i'll be able to react but i don't know i want to hear and i'm scared you need engine canceling instead of just straight noise canceling so someone needs to make a startup where they can isolate different frequencies of different motorcycle engines remove it and then allow everything else i'm sure that would give you something maybe i've tried a few different things like ear pods two different bows and like these beats by dre like with active noise canceling none of them fit under the helmet really well. I tried one that I didn't like.

It fit on your jaw and it's bone conductivity. Have you seen that? Yeah, we looked at those on the air. Really neat idea. And I have a friend who swears by it. He's a bicyclist also. But for me, like, I don't know, like you could press your jaw here in a really uncomfortable way. And that's what it did.

Have you ever used a throat mic? The ones that. No. So the microphone goes here and uh it doesn't matter how loud you speak because it's like tapping tapping straight into the vibrations of your is your trachea um no i don't believe so esophagus is what you die if you choke that allows you to speak and recently paleontologists found evidence that dinosaurs had tracheas which would mean that they could speak i I think. Or not speak. They're not language, but

noises. Don't sell yourself short. No, no. I've seen several cartoons where they spoke. I put on one of those. We were wearing those mics and the tanker ear sets one time when we were inside this APC, and it's just punishingly loud. It's like being inside of a tractor.

Somehow you could get in the tractor. I can't imagine that. It's like that. of a tractor like if you somehow you could get in the tractor i can't imagine man it's like that and then you put on this heavy duty old-timey russian helmet and it's like oh shit this is noise canceling old school style and like his voice is being pumped into me like almost through a tube or a hose or something via his throat mic and it's just it's we've got perfect communication. Me and this guy who's also who's in the front role-playing mind you. I've had that in touches your neck.

I've had that in airplanes. It doesn't touch your neck. So maybe yours was better still. But if you hop in like somebody's helicopter and they have Bose headset, they're the best, I think, for their passenger. It's like, oh, this is going to be nice. And sure enough, it is an incredibly loud environment inside a helicopter. Super loud.

Yet the right noise canceling and headset can make it seem pretty good. You can talk to each other well. What do you wear when you fly? The paramotor? Surely you're not listening to that lawnmower so i have um like ear protection that you get like construction would wear earmuffs and under that i have noise canceling uh like music they're the beats by dre things i don't know they're like i apple makes them now of course but anyway yeah so just wireless earbuds under hearing protection so i kind of double up hearing protection and dre things i don't know they're like i apple makes them now of course but anyway yeah so just

wireless earbuds under hearing protection so i kind of double up hearing protection and listen to music and then you have the altimeter on your knee or not on my watch okay so that's the only thing you use don't have any knee pad stuff when you're flying no that's nice keep it no if i do acro stuff i'll put a gopro on my thigh so i can film it in the wing but and that's just mostly for learning or maybe if i die or near die there'll be interesting footage yeah you gotta hope last moment yeah right hopefully knock on wood it's another near die you know another near die fingers crossed but yeah it or even like if it goes well it's footage that only i'm interested in where i can look at it and you know just evaluate my inputs and what I did and learn from it.

Because if you're doing like acrobatic flying in the air, I'm really task saturated. And my memory of what happened doesn't always match the video. So it's nice to have video and really get it right and know what you did right and wrong. It's a good term, task saturated. I like that. it's how i feel playing age of vampires when i get attacked task saturated and i start to panic uh josh i wanted to check in because last time you were on we talked a long time about your family and that that situation and everything that the drugs that the betrayal and all that has any more

anything new come of that are you still in the kind of the clean break not clean break but the the break uh portion of it they've tried to reach out a few times but i'm pretty much unresponsive um can you refresh your mind the listener's memory like just a quick sure so um uh when i started doing youtube I was trying to help my parents out because they lost their house, my parents lost their jobs. And so, I brought them to Utah where I live and floated them until they got back on their feet. It turned out they never got back on their feet and they decided to start doing drugs. I mean, I make it sound kind of bad, but like, you know, how do I, how do I phrase this here? It didn't go as we planned at all. And drugs were involved and they started lying to me and stealing from me and pawning my stuff and so on. And I didn't want to believe it at first. You'd never in a million years, would you think that your parents doing that? And I guess looking back, of course I can see, yeah, that's pretty obvious now, but at first um you'd never in a million years would you think that your parents doing that and

i guess looking back of course i can see yeah that's pretty obvious now but in the moment i know i have the flu today i'm sick whatever right like i need some money i was like okay um but then eventually uh i had to cut him off and well i refused to pay their rent and my grandparents cut me off uh and said never talk to us again and that just basically no contact with uh with the family so since then it's been like maybe two years or something so far um and they've reached out a few times but it's of course i've had this conversation with myself a few times how i would handle it but it never goes the way i think whenever i get like a text or an email because of course their numbers are blocked but they just make new ones or whatever so

my sister has a kid now apparently um that's interesting is that your problem now? No, no, I don't, I don't think so. I just like, part of me is just like, I don't know who thought this was a good idea. Like, you know, like why did this, I mean, I hope it goes well, but like. I love your, I love, I know it's going through your head right now. I mean, I hope it goes well, but. I don't know. I doubt it. That's not where the smart money is i don't know from is this sister also struggling with drugs you mentioned the parents but yeah that was the actual cause it

was my sister uh some was like involved with some bad dudes and then that spread i believe to my parents and then they were all doing it. Yeah. Has there been any attempt at reconciliation from their end at all? Or are you not even hoping for that anymore? They tried, but it's very like, it's like nothing's changed. You know, they'll say things like, well, my dad sent me some emails like a few weeks ago. And I haven't said anything about it or anything. But it was just like, well, if you don't talk to to me I guess I'll have to live with it and it's like

what what are you guilting me with like an apology sort of thing it's just weird thing to say yeah or like yeah I'm sorry about then but this is now type stuff is what they've said that was then this is now just manipulative stuff and um of course there's like a part of me that wants to share like life achievement achievements with my parents you know like what i did look what i've you know um and that goes through my mind every time they reach out like would it be different if i responded but then i you know no not really what is the drug which drug is in heroin i believe oh yeah i'm just wondering'm like, maybe it's his pot. And Josh, a bit of a square.

No, no, no. Great turn of events. I go over there. Woody, Doritos everywhere. Garbage untaken out. Dishes in the sink. In the sink, Kyle. I cut them off.

They were watching Cheech and chong i don't know how many times they've seen it woody they're like zombies they're not my parents anymore like i'd be like shit man maybe you should smoke with them but no you're not this you just walked into their apartment and they were there boneless like those old commercials soaking into the couch remember those weed commercials i used to like hanging out with sarah until she started getting high and then it was just her on the couch dude i guess sarah's having a dope time right now give her those commercials made me think that weed must be so fucking crazy because it was like like you would put a baby in the microwave on weed what it's like i don't think i'd do that. You remember that one, right? It's not the microwave, it's the oven, actually.

I think the deal is like the babysitter's getting stoned while the mother is away, and she's like doing a bunch of stuff while she's stoned, and she's supposed to put the turkey in the oven, and the baby in its crib, and I think at one point, she wakes up and hears the smoke alarm going off, and she looks in the crib, and think at one point like she she wakes up and hears the smoke alarm going off

and she looks in the crib and the turkey's in there because that's a different that's a different commercial this is what i was talking about yeah i remember the deflated person just out just yeah yeah i didn't they let off strong none of these ring a bell for me but what i did see was nancy grace on fox news she was always banging the drum about how pot made you murderous it made you want to kill people and every time a murderer also had like a fucking roach in his ashtray i maybe use that right yeah they're like this is the cause here it is he went into a murderous rampage because of the marijuana yeah what was he doing before he got high and it's like well he was a rapist but it's like it's like

okay uh so with with your family uh i guess last time you were on it was like a year ago so like it's been like twice as long has it been like i don't know last time you were on it was like a year ago so like it's been like twice as long has it been like i don't know last time you spoke about your girlfriend and how like her father like he had a great relationship with him have you kind of started to feel like kind of shifting families almost like you have another support system network hopefully i i would say it's like 100 i've just leaned over now but it wasn't very easy at all there was a lot of me like can i trust them can i trust them do i really i'm sure of him but he i mean he met me like three times and he was like yeah y'all can come live in my basement if you want if you want to get out of the city while you do something else to figure it out like that to me is pretty open human like he had no real

reason to do that other than me being his daughter. Girlfriend's dad. Yeah. Standard. If I'm being honest, like standard, that's what good, that's what decent people do. Yeah. For that.

Yeah. That's decent people type shit. What you need, what you need is like an arbiter of decency to like hang out with you and be, when somebody's like, like offers you some gum, you'd be like, can you believe that guy offered me gum shit? What should I do?

I think I'm like, dude, you should just keep walking i mean it sounds funny there's been a learning curve for me realizing what is normal now like people being nice or people being nice to get something like it's easier for me to see the difference whereas before i couldn't um i mean to put it simply i guess i was just pretty gullible like i try to see the the best give everyone the benefit of the doubt. And that I think they instantly know that if they're that type of person and then, I don't know, they take advantage, but it's been a lot of me. I don't know.

For a while, I just trusted no one, no matter what, like everyone's at a distance and now it's like, okay, this, this feels, this feels all right. But I would say like, they're basically my family at this point. All the holidays together, we go on trips. That's great, man. Yeah. Pretty hopeful. I'm glad I have this ending to tell, I guess.

No, yeah. It's good that you get to see the other side of it. Because you had kind of a warped sense of of what family and those relationships are about i mean that's but there's a there's like a little bit of like maybe resentment for having just now finding out that it didn't have to be that way and for other people it wasn't that way and so like you know i have to remind myself like it's not too late you can just enjoy it now but like you know i look back at my childhood and i'm just like wait other people didn't do this and like i can't imagine my father lying to me like like that's such a crazy thing that that he would that like i can't imagine like if if if there was

any money between us him trying to like get away with not giving me my money back like like that is such a foreign like you might as well like say it's it's like someone who was molested by their father man like what your your dad doesn't you know fill you up a little every morning like no dude he doesn't ever fuck that is not a daddy thing yeah probably the most it's just as alien like probably the most memorable times where i was just i didn't know he was lying at the time but looking back he came to one of my pilot lessons when i was getting my ppl and um he rolled up in the parking lot he had like this little i don't know like a scarf on his governor's face he cracked the window he's like come over here because he was going to

come right along with me just to hang out father-son time but then he's like i got i got i got covid i'm sick i need money i gotta go to the doctor that that wasn't true and i told him oh no and it turned out that was a lie now he's gone well let's remind him where he was his i think i remembered i think he told that when he was on i can't remember the amount of money yeah the amount of money that we were talking about too is like tens and tens of thousands of dollars don't forget like that whole we got to get off that story you're gonna depress me i know he's i know i don't even want to talk about anymore it's such a sad fucking shitty story it's awful well it seems like it's going better for him so that's a good thing there we go hey sorry i hit the refresh button on my browser and uh yeah my bad i i did hear what you're saying kyle so we'll

move on to the next topic i don't think it's a bad topic i just feel bad making you go over it again it's so rough man no it's it's been a learning experience so i've learned to like kind of put the emotional side away but there was that where he pretended to have covid and had like an actual emotional breakdown in the public parking lot and my my instructor's there and i gave him the money and he left and there was another time he's like hey i need 80 cash here's my check i get paid tomorrow um you can cash it then i was like okay here's the cash i'll cash your check and you've paid me back but he knew that check was going to bounce like things like that that you only realize now it was premeditated and just manipulative that makes you go hmm yeah it's unbelievably shitty to knowingly use your

influence over someone that way to to take from them leveraging your kind of emotional influence i would never do that to my kids like i don't have kids but i can't imagine ever stealing from them or lying to them or yeah it makes it worse right like like and if something bad happens to you when you're out and about that sucks if someone breaks into your living room and does it now your home your your safe space has been violated and it doesn't feel safe anymore this is your parents right if someone's a dick to you and you met him in online and you just trusted the wrong guy and whatever, that sucks. But when your mom and dad do it, that wasn't supposed to come from them. They're supposed to be on your side.

They know how I tick. They know all the things that would stress me out or push me over the edge or whatever. So it's just, yeah. You probably already found with YouTube Frame how so many people who just entered your life want to use you in some way. Ooh, do you have this many subs? You know, I've got a message I'd like to get out there. I'm doing a Kickstarter for my next trip.

Can you tell everyone about it? Or whatever. How many, I'm sure you get tons of emails from people that have great business ideas. Does that happen to you often? Cause it happens to me. Lots of startup ideas. You're overestimating how much email I read.

Well, have you, have you, you know, there's going to be a diamond in the rough in there somewhere. You got to keep reading all those business suggestion emails. It's like, Hey,

you and me can like do this and you build it and then chill it on your channel and like i'll manage it yeah all right i do everything yeah it's like mr beast burger but it's my channel and it's like you're not mr beast like what are you gonna do that guy's more famous than like leonardo dicaprio almost at this point if you include like the total global population i bet it's hard to he's there i don't know who i'd pick that's a good point that's a good point every so often i think like even my own what do i have 400 million views on my channel something like that um who am i more seen then right do i have more views than i don't know taylor swift uh fucking definitely not that music videos yeah she's i think she's one of like those okay so she's a mega star yeah you gotta give me another one like uh

so bad with celebrities right like the kardashians big tons tons of followers tons of yeah but like i i just feel like there's someone you know like a name that you could do and and be like yeah actually you know what he's more known than that guy in boondock saints not you weren't for that one fucking movie you would have macaulay culkin like if it weren't for home alone as far as total views because like his online presence he's one of those celebrities that was big a long time ago. You know what I mean? I almost wonder if you took away Home Alone 1 and I only had to compete with Home Alone 2, I may have Macaulay Culkin.

In what regard? Home Alone 2 is big. Views in what regard? I'm just comparing every random... How does Macaulay get a view? Someone watches his movie. I don't know where else he's getting views. He's on multiple television shows in prime time is he mccauley he's in multiple youtube videos with like multi

millions of views like he pops on red letter media's channel sometimes it does like a two million video then you would be better at this because like i just picked him because i'm i was trying to think of an older celeb what he was saying his channel has like 400 million views tremendous what what level of celebrity would you have to go down to to be like i've got more views than like so that guy here's what i've always liked to do ron howard's brother you got him beat i always like to compare youtube views to movie ticket sales because that's the way you can really shit on that in that regard the movies but those are people who show up to a place and plunk down $20, so it's a real shitty way to compare.

Like the guy who went, nah, I don't like him at all, never again. Like, that's a ticket sale. Right. The guy who watched six seconds of my video and said, nah. It's weird to, it's a weird thing to throw any kind of a metric around and get a feel for

for like the impact of a youtuber but yeah 400 million views is such a tremendous amount of eyeballs minutes watched is a cool metric too you can go in and see like total minutes watched like consumed minutes so each person who watched a minute that's counted you know that's a fun metric i feel like that's like a pound for pound kind of kind of metric maybe gives you better an idea of what's really going on it seems like it'd be when i look at mine it's i just compared to like this is multiple people's lifetimes there's no way that you could ever achieve this as one person impossible so this is insane do you guys ever like i'm sure you've done more meetups than me but like to me when i'm looking at my channel, I just see views. And then occasionally I'll poke at CEOs and stuff on LinkedIn. And sometimes my subscribers will go there and also let them know what they think.

And it's just so like it's very like maybe a humbling experience to see the real people and their professional icons and what they do. Because everyone's just using their their troll names and meme names for their comments that they would normally do but then you have then you see them like maybe forced to be a little bit more respectful like i don't know it's just wild because i see a view count and then i don't know i just like these are i sit in my room and rant you know i've done i've done a bunch of different meetups and gone to a bunch of different events that like so we've hosted a bunch ourselves like our little podcast here has done like multiple paintball events where people would come and join us. I've done, I've done some of those myself. Um, and then I've gone to a bunch of like events and stuff like that. I find that people are overwhelmingly awesome when you meet

them. And once as, as someone who does stuff, like once you get over the weirdness that each of these strangers that you meet is, is, is, knows you as well as you know stuff, like once you get over the weirdness that each of these strangers that you meet is, it is as knows you as well as you know yourself, like, like just go ahead and greet them. Like they're your best buddy and like go right into inside jokes and talking about like people by their first names without explaining as soon as you're comfortable with that closeness that you have.

Like I always like meeting people, you know, it's always like meeting people you know it's always funny at a meetup do you ever feel like you don't have enough time to like give them that time they've given you i imagine that's kind of how i would feel like you've watched so many of my videos i wish i could talk to you specifically for 20 my very my very first one um i did a paintball event in juliet illinois at a at a place was very cold, and I was there for two days. And a lot of people showed up the first day. And it was just me, and the park's closed.

And I got like 275 people that have shown up, and each of them has spent over $100. And I was not physically up to running for eight hours a day for two days straight. It was. Exactly. I wasn't prepared but i did but what and because like they there's so many of them that like they're not all playing simultaneously so so they're taking breaks like this guy go and play for 20 minutes then he's out tinkering with his gun filling his shit up buying a snack having lunch i can't do that because another group is going out there and they want to play too and then they're coming off so

they're rotating and i'm going and i went straight for both days and on day two when i started i just remember my quads and my thighs and my ass because you it's a lot of crouching like if you're master chief and halo lots of that going up and down over cover and i'm i don't know how many squats i had done the first day but more than i'd ever done and i was i remember just being so in so much pain like starting that second day but being but feeling awful if i if i didn't go out there and like give these people their money's worth i didn't want to i didn't want them to go back and be like, yeah, he just hid inside the building the whole time. I think his butt hurt. I don't want to be that. I wanted to remember you fondly.

Yeah. No, we've always done a really good job, I feel like, in those things that giving people their money's worth. If we save that one kid's life, remember that duct tape kid? The kid had shown up, and instead of buying paintball gear, he had crafted it all out of duct tape. You know, like making layers of it and like patterns and like knitting it together. And he'd made this tactical vest and he wanted to meet me so much that he was waiting outside the doors, like our exit entrance, not the public exit entrance, like our little personal area there. But he was sitting on black concrete in July.

And like, and I'm wearing duct tape not very breathable wearing duct tape and i just had come back into our building and i was just gassed from the heat and the running i'm cooling off stripping down drinking gatorade and i see that kid and i go how long's that kid been out there and nobody knew i'm like hey buddy, buddy, you okay? He's like, ah. Come in and give me some water. Kyle! I'm like, we got to get some Gatorade. He was about to die out there. It turns out he's like somebody's special needs son of a friend or something like that.

I still have a cup that that kid gave me. I think his mom worked in like the um ceramic industry or something so she had just had like tons of samples and so he brought those samples and started giving them to us which some of them like laser etched for us like did he have our names on them maybe or that i don't recall because mine is a kettle one like copper vodka mug i think you're supposed to drink uh like like white russians out of it i think the copper or something about like moscow mule thank you that's that's what it is um and uh i've never done that but it's still in my fucking like cabinet and i've never used it because it's coppered it makes things taste bad but i look at it and i think that's that weird little kid's mug he gave me

that time in chicago that's that mug that's supposed to be used for that one specific drink that i don't drink. Yeah, but that kid gave it to me, so I held on to it for the last decade. Yeah. Well, you just keep trying drinks out of it. Something will be good. Maybe milk. Milk out of your copper

glass. Oh, go ahead. I got a couple things. Is that a cuneiform tablet? Yeah. You got your notes? Okay, what do you got? I watched a movie and a TV show. I think they're both good recommendations. Which do you want to hear about?

Movie. It's a Nicolas Cage movie with it's a it's a nicholas cage movie with pedro pascal it's called um it's got an odd name it's like the incredible burden of a measurable talent or something like that you'll find it if you've searched but it's uh it's fascinating nicholas cage plays himself and the premise is he's he's down on his luck he needs some money his agent's like there's a guy who wants to pay you a million dollars for a birthday party, and it's Pedro Pascal. And so he goes to Pedro Pascal's amazing

place, and they have this bromance that kicks off, and it's really interesting. It's really funny, and I liked it. And it might be the best Nicolas Cage movie I've seen in a really long time because it's a little meta,

um, because they're talking about making a movie together. Pedro's like, and so they'll be like, I don't know. I definitely want a big drug scene though. You know, where,

where they're just fucked up. Meanwhile, they both just dropped acid. They're referring to the drug scene in the movie that they are making, that they are in right now, as well as the movie that they would potentially create together in this fictional universe. So it's very meta in that way. And that happens a couple times.

And he's like, I don't know, you're going to want some moments for the trailer. Pull! Boom! It's like, that was in the trailer. Him shooting that gun was in the trailer. There it is. But the story's actually interesting and i found nicholas cage cage's performance of himself was really good

it was really good i don't know i think he's one of the greatest american actors you know you don't have to do that you know this is like that this is like that thing when somebody shows up and they're like guess how much yes guess how much I spent on this? And Taylor's like, $85 million. There's nothing better. Guess how much weight I lost, Taylor? 75 pounds. And it's like, fuck!

No! Not that much, damn it. Are you a piece of shit? It's fun. It's fun. No, I've been enjoying the last of us so much that i wanted to watch some more pedro pascal stuff and i yeah that's i knew that was out so i went back and watched it last night i really liked it i thought it was great how do you mean the most recent one i was gonna say how would you compare pedro pascal's performances to like one of his more like the mandalorian do you prefer him in that role or i i prefer the last of us but

like what do you think in terms of all of his other roles like game thrones you know i really liked his his suave nature in uh in game of thrones i like that he was finally we had a character that had enough like power, like like not just physically, but enough power like socially in that in that world that he could talk shit to anybody that he could go up to the Lannisters and and be like, yeah, you know, they're like, oh, yeah, we don't really have bastards here. And it's like, yeah, well, we don't rape women and their children to death in my country. We find that distasteful. You know, he could he could talk shit to them. So I like that a lot. That's my favorite performance of his. That being said, I'm loving him as Joel.

I'd never played the games before. I'm vaguely familiar with what they're about, but don't have any interest in the game. But I'm loving the show. I think we're all up on the show to varying degrees. I think it's pretty good. Yeah, the newest episode was good. I think it's pretty good. Yeah, the newest episode was good.

There's a few little things that are pacing related that I don't care for. It's too fast. They're kind of rushing through. Too fast. Thank you. They got to stop. They should have spent some time taking a break, and then they can carry on. Yeah. I think it's supposed to take longer.

At least the story is like, what, a few months? It's like the travel time in the show yeah and then that's like an episode or two and i think that's a symptom of a a project that that that needed to get enough viewership to get a season two they needed to craft a season one that would be a winner no matter what um and i think if it was a slow burn and it wasn't at the quality i think it's capable of being a slow burn. It turned out it is, but they didn't know that. They didn't know that the chemistry was going to be that good.

So I think when they wrote this thing, they were like, yeah, let's get them all the way there by episode five. How about that? That was ridiculous. It was jarring. It was just one week an episode when, what was it, like episode three or four or whatever, where they're like, ah,

they're like passing the fucking royals stadium in kansas city and it's like that is so you're a thousand miles like in in just between episodes you're right and i sent you guys more of a an odyssey across the country um i sent you guys the map today i'll send it to zach too and it's a map of like the infection according to the is that what that map was yeah i don't know what cordyceps is i know st louis is a little fucked i guess i'll learn on the show yeah yeah it's so fucked in this scenario uh so cordyceps are you know the fungus that that caused all this it's the it's the the macguffin if you will uh it's the big bad guy. And this map is based off of the intro map.

When you're watching the show, the intro is a bit like Game of Thrones. You're not just seeing colorful montages of stuff. You're seeing relative information. And Game of Thrones, it changed week to week. It was really cool. But here you get to see kind of how the outbreak started and spread in various areas. But if you look at this, how difficult it would be to go from Boston, I always forget just how far up and in the corner Boston is.

For some reason, I always like picture it up there around Virginia, just on the right side of the coast. No, it's way the fuck up there in the corner. corner and they're going from there through like there are a few paths that you could take on this map that would be more difficult than what they chose I'm sure Zach will get it up eventually it seems like they took

one of the scariest routes possible to do what they needed to do not intentionally it's just there was no there's so much shit between them and where they're going but there's no reason when going from Boston to Wyoming to have a stop in kansas city if kansas city is also like a ground zero kind of well i think they're following they might be following the games as far as that i don't care where they stop or like where they do detour i just wish they'd slow things down a little bit because to

me the meat and potatoes of this show the meat and potatoes of this show, it's the opposite of Walking Dead. Walking Dead thought we needed to have these characters chatting all the time. And it's like, dude, we're done with that. I don't care about this eight-string character's backstory. I don't care that his pregnant wife, that he had to kill her five years ago. Because he's going to be dead. When they start introducing characters where it's like, hey, calm down joshua this isn't your d3 football field and it's like oh like that's not we've never had the making of the athlete like he throws a brick

and kills someone later and makes a comment i'm gonna scream like yeah i i don't need those guys backstory but but in this i feel like the meat and potatoes isn't the, the fighting of the zombies. Like it wasn't walking dead for me. I loved a good, like zombie battle in that show or, you know, for,

and this, I want to see Joel and Ellie talk. I just want to see them talking the whole episode. Cause she is so good. Yeah. Look at this fucking trip. They're making their chemistry is fantastic. Um,

I thought that his performance in this recent episode where he cracked up and started crying um was tremendous when he's crying to his brother um um i thought that was great that that almost made me cry and um but yeah you look at this trip that they're making you know look where kansas city is it's right under the biggest blob in the nation the biggest blob that exists in the nation and you're just gonna pop into kc you know why go to why go through that nice little area from toledo to chicago up to minneapolis yeah i guess it'll be cold up you know to be fair taylor like if you've got cold spanker for it right oh i mean but do you want to walk in the cold i would that

would be my choice i would choose the cold. I would choose the cold. And those zombies, by the way, we've talked before about how there's different kinds of zombies, right? There are the slow, dumb zombies that can't navigate a ladder or a chain link fence. And there are the fast, scary as hell zombies from 28 Days Later. These are pretty much 28 Days Later zombies. Some of them with... They have special abilities am i under the so the infection's slower but don't they run hard am i yeah this is its own

thing right this is very interesting i like when we get new kinds of zombies 28 days later is a good example because those weren't zombies those were those were people with like a hemorrhagic fever slash rabies type thing. So they were alive and living. And you don't have to shoot them in the head. You just got to put them down. I have a more inclusive zombie definition. No, no, no.

They're in there. No, no, no. I appreciate them. They're one of the types of zombies, if you ask me. This is a whole new thing, though, being like a fungus puppet. I really like the implications of that and the and the special types of them is neat you know the bloater thing i think that the clicker is coming up from the ground you got the click the boss one that came out

yeah um i find that very interesting here's another um um thing i did not like at all the casting of like the boss lady back in the town yeah i got no problem with a boss lady but like why didn't if you wanted that kind of character her to look and sound like that why don't you just get um um melanie uh who's a nick offerman's wife megan melanie like like i'm oh she's a good actor she's on snl like like i don't know google mega mulaney you'll you'll see what she looks like um anything would have been better than the the the chubby chick from two and a half men is that who that was yeah because like yeah you're right he's like obsessed neighbor who's like always trying to like get him to fuck her again like it was it was distracting seeing those like hard-hitting guys like pretending to be afraid of her whatever it's like respectful i would say because of her brother megan which is her brother but like she wasn't

doing a very good job yeah nick offerman's wife megan mulaney i just thought that and who who puts all the fungus down there in the catacombs and is dusting their hands off like fucking done. 100% done. You gotta do more than just put him in the basement. You gotta fire something, fill it with concrete. Anything. Anything but nothing. Get her in there. She's great.

Him without a beard is weird to me. That took me a second. I like his hair like that, though. I'm good with the hair. The beard's just not the actor. He's much younger than you think. Beards age you a lot, which is like when you can add on a few years and still

look good, that's a bonus. Like when you're 22 and you look 27 at work, that's a thing. But when you're 45 and you look 55 with your gray beard, that's a whole different fall away. 45 and you look 55 with your gray beard that's a whole different fall away taylor guessed his age i dude so i was i'm on them fucking money 52 yeah you tell i was stoked on that he has a good beard no what are you you're you're just you're you're making fun of gray beards and i think it's because you don't want to come to terms

with the fact that you have you have a tremendous gray beard. My beard is gray as fuck. That Jackie abuses you. She has the world of one good beard. All I'm saying is this chick is a better actress than the one that they used. And she's Nick Offerman's wife. I'm sure she'd have been happy to work on the same project as her husband. I just had that thought when I was watching it. But really, any other character would have been better.

There's also too many fat characters. You know, here's my problem with there being fat characters. They shouldn't be fat. Here's what I would love to see, Taylor. I'd like to see the overweight characters be like the most greedy, rich, overfed characters. Like everybody else should be. If you went to a place and met a community where everybody seemed to be starving, but then you met the

boss, and he was like 350, 400 pounds, which in their times would be like 800 pounds, that would be a cool thing to say. Like, yeah. They call him Boss Hog. He's like, I get seven parts, and you

get one. He's just an ogre he's taking like he's never point out that he's not british ever you know what as i think about it back to the guest that's what that's how american companies run like the the ceo at top gets paid three thousand times as many as his workers three thousand times as much as his workers three thousand times as much as his workers do he just hogs it all he fills his own mouth and everyone else is left for scraps aren't they three thousand times as rare though than just a guy who can turn a knob if you think about it i don't know i don't know i mean when you have a dude like i see the argument right like a lot of

people are like you don't do anything whatever but like that i believe it's because they have the ability to shift a lot of people's money one way or the other so like if they're managing hundreds of millions and they're getting paid a few million and they have the ability to make those people way more money or way less money or make them lose money then i think at least that's the justification i've heard from them. I saw, I saw a Congress woman, um, talking to a CEO today. He runs some, like he runs,

he moves 2.6 trillion. He manages $2.6 trillion apparently. Um, and, uh, she's like a cashier at one of your branches here in Irving, California. She makes 1650 an hour.

She's a single mother and, her apartment 1600 a month. And he starts, she starts going through this math. And before she's even done with it, I'm like, She's a single mother and her apartment's $1,600 a month. And she starts going through this math. And before she's even done with it, I'm like, why is a single mother trying to live on her own in Irving, California, working as a cashier? I think that she's made like eight poor decisions before we get this CEO in a spot where he needs to justify what he's paying people. Like, where's the baby's dad where's the

where's the lady's husband where's she took no he has zero education okay where oh she's paying for child care as well she has no parents she has no network whatsoever you're talking about a special scenario here a lady who has gone out and had a child on her own who has no one in her circle who can help her at all like not not only that, her mom abandoned her, her dad, her sisters won't watch the kid. Like, like she's got nothing.

And, and when she finishes this math, of course, this lady is in a deficit, not even, uh, accounting for other necessities that like clothing and, and,

and school lunches and things like that. Still at a deficit. She's like, now how is she supposed to make up this deficit? And he's got one of those lawyer answers. I'd have to think about it. I'd have to think about it. I's got one of those lawyer answers i'd have to think about it i'd have to think about it i'd have to think about it you'd have to think about it you operate 2.6 run 2.6 trillion dollars and you can't make up a 547 i'd have to think about this are we done i have a 130 blow job on a yacht

that's exactly how it went but you know what for that i'm gonna have you kill you that's the kind of billionaire i'm gonna be straight up bad whenever i see those like it seems like almost like a court proceeding in that they're afraid to upset the senator or the congressman or whatever they may be i what if he was just like fuck you what would happen oh is he like a court or something like what would happen have you seen like when zuckerberg like when he's been questioned by him it's like zuckerberg is trying to look super serious as though he's not more powerful than all of them where they're like, Mark, what's the deal with this part of Facebook?

And he's like, don't know. And that's, that's not my purview. Like he just, he said whatever he wanted during his, what was depositions? No,

not depositions. What is it called? What is it? A deposition? I'm not sure. Isn't it like, don't they ask when they, when they summon the CEO of Google,

they'll ask questions and just some of the senators and congress people they just don't understand the answers that he's giving yeah and so they're just grilling him and grilling him and and he's just repeating the same answer like this i don't know how else to say it and they're like well we don't we don't know and i imagine that happens with mark as well have the vocabulary steve king steve king is a racist as fuck i think house of representative guy i think he actually got voted out but um he's like why is it when people google my name they keep coming up with the racist things i said different news articles different things different quotes videos of me it's all negative and to his mind it's google big tech out to get him but in reality it's like dude that's

the most newsworthy part about you yeah your racist stances yeah they don't have the vocabulary and they don't have the experience with those tools platforms and technologies to to even explain he was complaining to apple about google results yeah they were trying to explain that's happened yeah was that that ancient guy who like it's like why can't google be on my phone and he's like that's not it's like complaining to chef or yardee because your food was cold at the olive garden all right like you don't even know what you're talking about sir it's like they're both greasy italians and i don't like i'm telling you the breadsticks were cold, goddammit.

You're a chef, aren't you? Well, yes, sir, I am a chef. All right, what does a chef do? And he's making you go through this list of things, and in your mind you're like, how is he ever going to get to me controlling the temperature of breadsticks? I don't know what I fucking do. Some 85-year-old Republican would have a gotcha where it's like

i explain this are you're having us believe that you are not a chef look at this photo and it's just like him on the can and he's like again i am a chef but i have nothing to do with the unlimited breadstick policy if sir if you were, it's a minestrone soup. I will make it right. Oh, so you're admitting you're culpable. No, I just want this to end. I just want it to end. This soup will get it done.

You'll be feeding the people in Guantanamo Bay now, Mr. Boyardee. You know, Chef Boyardee was a real man. Him and his sons, I believe, started a meat, initially it was a meatball company, I think, or maybe a deli, and then they ended up transitioning into the canned goods market, and they spelled his name phonetically, because it may have been around World War II, and maybe you didn't want to be a mamma mia kind of food out there in cans. So Chef Boy-R-D sounded a lot better, so they just spelled it like that. Plus, we can't howdy

everyone like america i saw them eating that chef already i think in like last of us and uh and then they kind of commented about that she's like he knows it she's like chef already knows his shit and he's like yeah he does you know what kind of stinks is like i bet he was really good he like i'm sure but he was really good at making pastas and stuff and now it is like, I bet he was really good. I'm sure. I bet he was really good at making pastas and stuff. And now it's like, I guess if he joined the canning operation. I haven't had Chef Boyardee since I was like seven. And therefore, I still think he's really good. I recall it being top flight food.

It is good. It's not bad. Like if you add, it just needs a little garlic it that's all it's lacking seven-year-old me did not share that opinion the sauce is like this sweet kitty sauce that needs like some basil and garlic to like kick it up a notch but like i haven't had chef already in a long time but i do have it in my pantry as like emergency food when i bought all that shit when we didn't know how bad the pandemic was going to be. Emergency.

I'm so high. That's what I ask at the pantry. Oh, I'm glad. I shouldn't be using a stove. You reminded me. Donald Trump taking the move, flying into Palestine. Wait, what the fuck? These are your notes now.

Yeah, I didn't show you my cuneiform tablet. It's the first language, Woody. It's real over here. I had to bake this in the sun. It's been terrible weather.

I had to learn another language, for Christ's sake. Donald Trump landed in Palestine, Ohio this week, trying to take advantage of sort of the left's sort of non-take on the whole thing, or at least their non-hyper-focus on the thing. And I noticed that he landed with supplies. I saw a bunch of Goya beans, like big pallets full of beans and pallets full of water. And the first thing he did, or the first video I saw anyway, he goes to the McDonald's.

He's so personable. Everybody's smiling and everybody's recording him. Everybody's happy he's there. Behind the counter, everybody's lined up at attention. The boss is here. He says, a lot of good-looking people back there. A lot of good-looking people.. A lot of good looking people.

I bet I know this menu better than any of you. I bet I know it backwards and forwards. I'm going to tell you. Look, we're taking care of all the fire department and all the police officers. So whatever they want, I got it. And he kind of buys out McDonald's. And it was just like. It's a good move.

Dude, it's hilarious. I buy it. He knows that menu. kind of buys out mcdonald's and it was just like it's a good move dude it's hilarious i buy that if they sent biden into burger king and had him try to do the same thing true he'd had a hard time raising his voice loud enough for everybody to hear it yeah he wouldn't know the menu yeah he wouldn't know i also struggle with that i can be loud i just can't be loud and nice i can only be loud it right yeah you got it here's the trick smile while you yell i'll try it that's how you do it hey guys you get one of those i've heard i've heard what he yelled it's it's oh that um the ai program 11 i think it is where you can sample lots of like uh audio and then they they they had. They've got one they call

Blue Boy Woody. They're using it against each other in our discord. They're being mean to each other with our voices. It sounds just like me. It sounds enough like you that it could hurt somebody's

feelings that grew up watching your Minecraft. It's real funny shit in there. They're going back and forth with those. I want to see it. Maybe the Hangout this weekend. Oh, yeah. Hangout is coming up this weekend. Always have a blast in there.

I haven't seen any nudity in there in a while. It's very disappointing. I'd like to see at least some talking about it. I'm on it. I'd like to see at least some talking about it. I've got enough years on my phone. I went to clean out my phone the other day, and there's so much Woody vascularity in there. He's just popping around every

corner as I'm going through my... My phone warned me. It's like, you've got 95 megabits left or something. We've got to get in here and clear some shit. Well, I've been on a cut so um i'm getting a new phone um for some reason the s23 is really cheap um it seems like a good phone to me it seems like an eight nine hundred dollar phone but i think i got it how much is it

i think they're like eight or nine hundred, but I got it for like a couple hundred via my carrier, I guess. Does it have the pin? It doesn't have the pin, right? It's just the brand new S23. Is it the Ultra or just regular? I think it's just the regular. I think it is the regular. Oh, wow.

I'm sorry. I just Googled the phone. Yeah, it's a big upgrade for me because I got like a Pixel 5. I don't know what this is. It's a three-year-old phone, though. It thousand bucks for the regular one on quick google yeah i'm excited i got the green one so it's gonna be fun to have a new fancy phone with a bunch of features i'm gonna take a lot of dog pictures again i don't know what the fuck this is but um i can't i just remember i got the one that had the big the best battery life

it's a motorola something, and it's so heavy. But it's got a two-day battery. Who will you be giving the new phone to? ATF? DEA? I don't say that. I don't say that. Jeez, I literally, like, when I-

FBI, you want to change it up a little bit? I literally said that at the time. I was like, you know, the last nice phone I had was the s8 edge you ever see one of those there it was amazing at the time i think at the time it was like it had a four maybe it had an 8k screen it had something like cutting edge nicest phone in the evidence lock it it was the nicest they came they came they locked me up like three weeks after I bought that fucking phone cash. It was so nice. The gimmick on that one is that there's no bezel.

The screen just goes to the edge and wraps over. I don't know. It feels nice. It's nifty. Did you have a case on it? I don't know. Okay. I generally don't use cases.

This one's broken right now, which is why I'm replacing it. The dog fucking knocked it down. Are you ever going to get it back? What happens with stuff? If they take stuff from you, you can't petition to be like, hey, can I get that back at least? Or are they just like, this is ours, and we'll talk to you? How does it work?

I think because it was evidence of like, because that was the phone where I had texted my girlfriend and been like, hey, you want to smoke some weed tonight or something like that one time and uh and so they just keep that bitch forever um and i got a bunch of my other shit back like like my pcs and like they took my garmin like the the way those warrants work it's like anything that turns on they're they're getting shit that doesn't have any connectivity they're just getting little devices and shit like anything like that's a vape that's a vape pen what are you taking you know anything that turns on they're gonna write them on your behalf like hey hey the fbi i have a lot of pictures of my shirtless friend they mean a lot to me can i have a copy i had um i just wanted to put myself on your radar real quick because,

because I made so many videos. One of the things that I would do, I would get somewhere to film and I'd be like, fuck, we didn't bring any memory cards, go to Walmart and buy three memory cards. And so I ended up with a huge, a plethora of memory cards,

everything from, from eight gigs up to like 64 gigs. And I mean like a double handful of them over the years. Each one of those individually bagged, labeled, zip tied up and then placed into a bigger thing. So when you get your shit back, it's like, where did y'all take?

Because they made this many memory cards look like a filing cabinet full of evidence. They just had to sit there and watch your videos. They just had to sit there and be like i bet one guy was like man this is a sweet job we're gonna leave this guy alone come on is that a tank no they and a lot of it was like the b-roll stuff like you would take a gopro with a magnet on it stick it on the barrel of a tank turn it on and let it roll for three hours stupid question kyle

have you ever been in a tank and i asked because i can't tell the difference between a tank turn it on and let it roll for three hours stupid question kyle have you ever been in a tank and i asked because i can't tell the difference between a tank and all the things that look like tanks yeah i have um i think the bradley right the sherman no sherman sherman sherman the uh the world war ii like sherman tank with maybe a 37 millimeter cannon on it um i've been in one of those with the working cannon and shot the cannon and driven over a jeep and um that was the time when it was like a collector's item like like obviously these things are rare because they're world war ii tanks but this one's like dressy like the the stars are painted right the fenders on these things you might think oh it's a tank

but it's tough well the fenders are just like car fenders the part that like sticks out on the edges and uh the guy who owned it was this big belly guy over there with overalls arms crossed i don't know what they told him to let me in this thing you know who knows what lies he'd been told by because there was like a middleman between me and him anyway and me and the and i'm filming with a reenacting crew these aren't not just a guy. That's Mo. He drives it. It's like, no, that's fucking Gunnery Sergeant Pete Townsend of the 44th Brigade. They're all wearing the exact

shit. It looks like Fury. There's pictures of it. I'm sure on my social media somewhere. It's like Fury. They're all in their gear with their helmets and everything. I'm in that thing and we're supposed to drive over the edge of this Jeep Grand Cherokee that I've procured for $800.

I want to crush the motherfucker. They're like, slowly go up to it, push up onto it, and then back off. I'm talking to homeboy that's driving it. I'm next to him. He's got his gear on and everything. I'm like, this is exactly how it would have been you know rolling through the streets of

some french town look how hard he hit this motherfucker he he hit it full fucking speed he didn't slow down a bit dude i hyped him up and he crushed it you know it's a tank so like a couple miles per hour okay in reality like jogging speed you know it's a tank so like a couple miles per hour okay in reality like jogging speed maybe but it's a tank so it like and and i don't know if you can tell from this angle but that front fender thing there is fucked up on the other side i'm pretty sure yeah that's uh what am i holding there oh i'm holding see i've got two rounds there the one on my left is like a solid lead projectile and the one on the right hand is uh my right hand your your like camera left is like a shot shell um which turned out to be completely ineffective even at close range just nonsense but what does that mean

like it was a like a tank i think it was around yeah yeah yeah i think it was supposed to shoot a bunch of balls or something if but we shot it and and I don't think we made contact with the target. We saw a little dust downrange where it hit the ground a few spots, and it was like... That would have scared some folks, wouldn't it? How many times did you shoot it? I honestly don't remember. We probably had a dozen rounds or something like that, I'm sure. They're just loading those. What was it like to get the rounds? How did you them where did the guy oh yeah so um if it the guys

who own tanks artillery pieces things like that that still fire um they load their own ammunition so they have enormous loading dyes kegs of powder like out of like video games you know the exploding barrels they've got those um and they'll make their own projectiles, form them out of liquid lead and make their own bullets because obviously you can't go get those old rounds anymore. And it requires some special licensing. Like first you've got to have a tank, which is really just a road vehicle in the end.

A lot of them have plates on them so you can drive them somewhere. We did that a couple of times, but then getting the breach to be live, I think it requires a type 10 um which is very very high level um you're able to manufacture destructive devices and make that breach live and then you just need rounds for it like i said that's kind of a small cannon i think that's 37 millimeter if i remember correctly it's been a while

but i shot a tank destroyer one time and that thing was like the bullet was big like it wasn't like something you'd hold in your hand it was like something you support with both hands like a goddamn child it's like this is the fucking bullet that goes in this fucking hell cat tank destroyer thing that thing was different that was like was it open top that was also like a it's called a tank destroyer but to my eyes it's like what's the fucking difference to tank we're down in this thing with the you know with a you're in it that one was a lot cooler that was a more modern piece like maybe korea or vietnam i'm just guessing i don't know shit about tanks that was when we nearly killed jeremy because jeremy was hanging out the top of the tank recording and i was shooting a plywood hut that we had put a trash bag full of Tanner right in.

I don't know how much we just filled the trash bag, like a big, like black trash. How did you shake it? Did you just shake it in the bag? Wow. And then we like tied a knot in the top, tied a rope to that,

held it in the center of, in the air inside of a car, a plywood hut that was like two by fours around the corners, begged the crowd to back up and they refused and so I got in that son of a bitch and let her rip and shit went everywhere pieces of two by fours that like a tornado had like torn them asunder

and made them into like lethal splinters that would just right past us I'm down in a tank I don't give a shit I've warned everyone i'm not sure you wouldn't be liable like not my hey guys i'm shooting toward you how many people were there like they didn't move not my 15 20 at least 15 how close were they when you're like three yards behind me um and like and like up on a ridge like like they were in the blast zone like that shit went up there to where they were um they they refused i i begged

and begged and i'm like i'm filming here they like we're on public land this ain't my tank like y'all need to leave i'm about to blow this shit up and they were like let it rip you know it's pretty usually usually tried to uh not have a fucking studio audience for things like that but i think that the guy that owned the tank like brought all of his buddies um to see the show what russian tanks have you been in the ones with the oh i don't i don't know what it's called um but it's um i drove it through this guy's house in Texas. He wanted his house destroyed because he was building a bigger, fancier mansion. And he also owns the APC or whatever it is.

It has a cannon, but it's non-operational, or at least it was at the time. They hadn't gone through the paperwork and everything of making it fire. But the gauges in that thing were radium. I think the gimmick we did there was I drove through the house at like full speed and then at one point i parked in the house and then we were trying to blow the

house down onto me so we set charges all in the house and like blew the house down yeah there you go wow see that that's a good shot from the drone there that's richard ryan's work uh rich richard was on the drone yeah richard ryan's on the drone there why is the explosion coming out of the roof like that because we set the charges on the second floor there's uh there's three charges on the second floor those charges are um i don't know the exact mixture but it's uh there's some plastic explosive and uh i and uh i think it's all plastic it's mostly plastic explosive but it's against water barrels and it's hyper pressurizing that water and creating those jets that you're seeing blow everything out.

So everywhere you see like a cloud of vapor, that's the water being used to send everything flying. It's a lot safer than the alternative, which would, you know, I didn't realize it was on a river when you felt, when I saw the video. Oh, that's a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. There's a place. Um, there's a, yeah, there's a sick pool in the backyard that like overlooks that that little valley and uh and that's his river it flows into a big lake that he's got the lake is full of like these giant inflatable obstacles to like ride your

jet skis around um that house was nice wasn't it before before you blew it up? That was technically a mobile home. So they brought that in. That's a modular home. See, that is a modular home. Because Dale Earnhardt lived for a long time in what's called a modular home. They bring it in sections and stick it together. Because he wanted a nice place fast at one point when he got all that money. But they were destroying that to build a very legitimate mansion, I'm told. But yeah, that guy's got every toy you can imagine.

I can't think of anything he doesn't have that you would want, you know, like if you want a fast car, a jet, you want your own skeet range. I mean, he's living on a wild game preserve. I have I have a wealthy friend and uh he's getting into flying now and he's like yeah i think you're gonna buy a jet and it's just like that he was asking me for like yeah what would you look for if you were choosing a flight in school like instructor you know and and i i didn't know but i had friends who have licenses so i passed it on but uh i it's just kind of neat to be like to have that kind of

cash he can have anything he wants nearly i mean there are some super yachts and stuff he's yeah but like he can make things happen as well because like i know there was a time um over there in texas where they were like well can't have a jet without a runway can we let's get started on that and it's just like hey call the graders we need a runway we're gonna need we're gonna need three miles of concrete to make that happen like how do you make that happen um they just made a fucking runway you know right there on the property i don't know what that must have cost what does a runway cost land and take off jet off is it a million how nice is it i don't know we got we got is it i don't know i is it? I don't know.

It's just a private landing strip in the end, but I know they land like a jet that you and the boys get in and hop on over to New Orleans and kind of thing. I've never seen an asphalt runway. Asphalt taxiways, yes, but not runway. Maybe it has to be grass or concrete. I don't know.

I guessed concrete. I don't or concrete i don't know i guessed concrete i don't i don't i don't know i don't know um no that's yeah that's pretty wild when you've got hundreds of millions of dollars and uh and and you've also like the way his thing is set up there i don't think there's a bottom i think um you know it's it's a non-profit they're running there with the wild game thing taking care of those animals. So, you know, I think things are set up real well there. I don't know this for sure,

but I think the non-profit is making a profit. I don't know. I'm just guessing. The profit is the enjoyment of the rehabilitation of animals and a love for the outdoors, I'm sure.

Well, I stand corrected. All right. The quickest way to survey his land is his private jet. Of course, to check on his animals and stuff. Yeah, makes sense. I keep saying it,

but I want to go kill a bear. Every time I'm like, yeah, I really want to go on a bear hunt. What kind of bear do you want to kill? No, any bear won't do. It needs to be a scare bear. Grizzly or a polar? A polar bear? Jesus. What kind of bear do you want to kill? No, any bear won't do. It needs to be a scare bear. Grizzly or a polar?

A polar bear? Jesus, want to go to the zoo? That would be fucking hilarious. And the kids are crying. I'm going for the arrow. Don't worry, kids, stay back! Make yourself out to be some total badass with a jungle background and a spear. I gotta go for a bear. And then you throw a spear into the cage.

Ah! Oh, my God. I come out like an Arctic explorer. How's he get a car? A polar bear. It looks like he's in the tropical rainforest. Or maybe one of them. You have one of those thick pelt coats in Atlanta.

You're so sweaty. Weltering. I just imagine you as that guy from Jumanji with all the stereotypical hunter gear. So you would fit in as well. Oh yeah. I was dressed for the warm weather. What else do you really want to do?

I think it's tall order and it's expensive at the same time. I don't even know if it can be exactly legally done. But I would like to kill a grizzly bear with primitive arms. I want to kill it with a bow and or a black powder rifle. What bow? Do you mean like old school? Oh, compound bow. a bow and or a black powder rifle, but I don't want to use a super, do you mean like a compound bow? Oh,

no, I would use a modern compound bow, right? Like we ain't got to go like native American, uh, on this shit. I'm not going to fletch my own arrows out of horse shit or anything. I'm going to get a modern compound bow that shoots 350 feet per second with a broad head,

this two and a quarter inches of razor blade thunder. Wouldn't you feel maybe a little more satisfied if it was like a old timey recurve bow or something? Are you out of your fucking mind? Not that it's wouldn't it feel cooler?

Like you bring it down like that? If we're being silly, then we can go down that realm, but if you want to know the truth about the difference between a recurve bow and a compound bow, it's like, wouldn't it be cooler if you killed it with a pistol with no sights? It's like, yeah, but I'm not a magician. So I don't think the idea of killing a grizzly bear

was a recurve bow. Settlers did it in the days of old. No, they didn't. Nobody killed grizzly bears with recurve bows. I was thinking that they did and that that would slide in past the goalie. No, he would kill you he would kill you um i don't i don't i can't imagine someone killing a grizzly bear with

a recurve bow i imagine it'd be like a two-stage fight the first arrow then you have to fight it with your hands like if we're falling back to a spear um or if we're in an elevated position we're just going to wound him like it just doesn't have enough power, I don't think, to penetrate him. You could shoot him repeatedly. He'll stick around for that. I'm back at the zoo idea. You can't really get him with the bow. I got all day, cocksucker. You look like a bull in a bullfight

with all the freaking things sticking out of him. Your mouth is stained blue from the icy stand. You look like me every time I play Minecraft with just arrows popping out in every direction. But with a compound bow, you can kill a bear. You can kill a moose. You can kill an elk. You can kill anything.

Compound bows are tremendously powerful if you're doing what you're supposed to do with them. A moose would be cool. Yeah, but I want to kill a bear because I want the bear skin. Are you picky? Would you be okay with any form of... Put put the rug on the wall if that makes sense would you be okay like a baby grizzly like or are you like no if i'm going grizzly hunting i want like like an alpha male that kind of has a territory well well i think i would be okay

with any grizzly bear like as long as it was like big enough to kill me like like as long as it like 500 pounds and up, like, I think I'd be satisfied. I could kill a little one. That's a good metric. Yeah, like, as long as it's big enough to kill you, that's still cool. Obviously, the bigger, the better.

I don't want to feel like the bully in the situation. You know what I mean? I want to feel like I'm punching up. You are the bully. He's not coming to your house with a bow. Like, fuck you up. God gave me over all the beasts of the land and the sky. Taylor, I'll have you know.

You might want to look that one up, okay? So he's in my house wherever he goes. Go ahead. God's house. Jot that down. We have been given dominion over the beasts of the land and the fish of the sea. And so I think we should continue to abuse them and pump them full of plastic. I don't care about those Bangladeshi fish.

Plastic it up. Maybe they'll make some floaties and it'll be easier on them. We'll get better fish that aren't so lazy. Yeah. Oh, no. My Bangladeshi fish fries. No. I'll care when it impacts me directly.

And by then it'll be far too late. Next time some motherfucker tries to tell me not to use a plastic goddamn straw, I'm going to show him that that chart we looked at of how much plastic goes in the sea per country that we're not even fucking on we're not even on the chart the chart united states you know i'm gonna start doing i'm gonna start cutting these straws into itty bitty pieces before i throw them before i rinse them down the drain that's what i'm gonna do i'm gonna cut them into such tiny pieces they'll go down the drain just just shredding it making it i'm gonna you're gonna

cut them into little worm shapes so the fish are confused and i'm joking like like being a piece of shit but i saw i've seen people on twitter being like take this libs and like pouring grease down the drain it's like that's like i hope you're that's not your house because that's not your house. Because that's not ideal, man. Bunch of fucking pussies say you shouldn't pour half a gallon of bacon grease down your fucking tank. Yeah, well, you shouldn't. I'll say this as well. Look, I always figure you're not supposed to do that. And hey, I bet you're not. I've always done it.

And I've dumped huge gallons at a time of vegetable oil down my drain. Never had an issue once. Here's what I do. Here's what I do. I move every year. That's true. Here's what I do. I move every year.

That's not fucking funny. My house has had a horrid leak for months i mean i did flush half a turkey down the toilet after thanksgiving i just dump it down the drain i'll tell you what my method is i usually heat it up first on the stove the oil and then i'll uh you know i'll run the hot water down the drain and then i'll throw some like some like some soap, some dishwashing soap down there. Because I like to imagine that kind of cuts the grease and maybe coats the pipes a little. So it slips down through them a little better, doesn't stick as much. I don't know. It got to help, though.

Sounds like it works. I'll give it a big squeeze of that. And then I dump that hot grease straight down there and I'll let the water run for, you know, five minutes with the, you know, add a little soap every now and then. I never have any issues and I don't care what's on the other end of that. Follow up soap seems like it would cut it too i and you know the drano is amazing i i almost want the thing to get clogged so i can use drano on it's so satisfying it is satisfying to use drano drano is amazing if it's stuck if it's slow drano goes right past it and it doesn't work you got that fancy kind that foams up i've had way better luck

with the little fishing things that have the pokey sides i have those yeah did you ever make the did you ever make bombs out of the um the uh that that um that lie uh drain cleaner stuff i grew up in a city kyle i jumped off. I rode my bike everywhere. I went surfing every day. I've never made a bomb. Woody and I are lame. All right, so here's what you do. In Minecraft, you get yourself like a 20-ounce bottle,

two-liter bottle if you're going big boy. For the three liters, you'd have to go to like a Minecraft Walmart or something like that. And then they used to make this product that had lye in it. That you can't remember the name of, yeah. No, I don't even know what that stuff was. But you'd put some aluminum foil in that bottle, and you'd add some of that other stuff in there, and you'd just put the cap on and give it a good shake. And I saw this happen to so many stupid kids.

You'd tell them, hey, man, shit takes about two minutes to activate. Then it's going to start producing a ton of gas. A chemical reaction is taking place. That gas is going to start pressurizing the bottle at a rapid rate. Once that chemical reaction has begun, you've got about 20 seconds before that bomb goes off. That bottle is going to get really big, and you might think, 20-ounce bottle popping? What's the big deal? It is like a shotgun blast going off next to your head. It is the loudest thing you can imagine.

Because it's over-pressurizing something. Take it to the very limit of that plastic, and you'd be shocked how big that plastic gets. A two-liter gets huge. Oh, it grows. Does it just scale up? Oh, yeah. Could you do it with a plastic barrel?

Maybe. There's an exothermic reaction happening too so it's like boiling aluminum foil in there and it's getting hot it's getting hot in the bottle and it's making this gas and it's just boom by the end and so people are sitting there like it ain't gonna do anything and it's like you're playing with an explosive like throw it i could throw it yeah those things are i can't believe you don't make any bombs growing up not even any little black powder stuff we didn't make them and we had firecrackers and repurposed firecrackers cherry bombs you ever dump out firecrackers and just kind of repurpose them that that was all i've ever done never i don't know the problem was that is like

most chinese firecrackers are kind of sealed up with that mud. They use mud on either end of the cardboard tube. Yeah. They take mud on either end and then the powder charge and the fuse

and then more mud and then it hardens up and that's what firecrackers are made out of. So getting the black powder out of them was always a problem. So I would just

go buy black powder from the store. Then you could just get around all that other stuff and do what you want to have your fun with your what age was this when you learned how to do that this was very recently i mean like no it wasn't no it wasn't four and a half um i think i started making like the uh i was about 15 probably making the um the ones with the toilet bowl cleaner. Old enough for Kevin Spacey. I was probably 12 when I started making my own firecrackers out of brass shells and gunpowder and cannon fuse and stuff like that.

That's what you would get out of firecrackers or what I would get. I would either get the sparklers or if I was lucky, I always want to go to the fireworks store, but I didn't want fireworks. I wanted cannon fuse. I wanted to make my own fireworks. I just needed fuse. Making your own fuse is a little scary. Did anyone question how you knew so much at such a young age about things that go boom? Well, I mean, I didn't run around town talking about bombs. I mean, if you needed materials, wouldn't they be like,

why do you need this little, little boy? He always keeps a well-worn copy of the of the unabomber manifesto and again you know i wasn't making like a daily practice out of like blowing stuff up but um you know i knew how to do that and that's what we did for fun there wasn't a lot else to do we're just blowing stuff up on the farm making all sorts of little really just pyrotechnics it it depends how you look at it if you look at it um if we were in california we would be testing pyrotechnics for our film career that's coming up but because we're in georgia we're like

whack power extremist maybe you never know it's like dude we're just having fun out here we want to make some cool videos yeah learning how to be russian i remember uh freddy w sent me this video on skype when he just had figured out how to make these fireball pyrotechnics and i was like i can do so much better like the next day like we were going to work trying to like blow that away trying to like fix that um no i've always liked blowing stuff up it's fun we like you grew up on a farm like when i would go to my grandparents farm often like we would ride atvs and like do stuff with the cows and like shoot guns a lot but no bombs a lot of paintball on the phone i have yellowstone questions so your grandfather has an actual cattle farm not anymore he's he's too old he used to okay that still works

did he use cowboys and horses to manage the cows no no he used uh atvs and a truck largely how many head of cattle are we talking uh it was like at the peak i think it was like 700 how big is that farm for that it was it was pretty it was pretty sizable usually it wasn't that many did he sell the land since then he sold some of it yeah yeah because it was just too much he like he just always loved it like he he grew up farming you know it's what he knew what he's comfortable with like he's one of those guys like coming to st louis is like the big city like he it's pretty big hates it He hates coming here. He'll be here for a day trip. He would sell calves or cow-calf

pairs? No, he sold directs to the fucking meat people. So they were probably taking the... He matured calves into cows and sold them. Probably keeping the cows and selling the males. That's all he did his whole life?

Just cattle farm? When he was much younger, he was an electrician. He would climb the poles and do that kind of shit down highways. That's what it was called. He's a lineman. Did

trucking. He did a bunch of stuff. Can I go back to the ATV thing? Were there a team of people directing the cows in some direction on atvs like four of them just buzzing around like it wasn't because the pastures were like subsectioned off in such a way like he didn't have a shit ton of people and so like they would just move them to smaller pastures like piecemeal. Like it wasn't a huge drive somewhere.

It's like, get them over there, close the gate behind them, knock them over to this pasture, close that gate. And that'll be at this pasture and this one for the next X amount of days. And they're moving them so that like there's fresh tall grass for them to eat here and rotten old grass yeah and so like you you naturally like cycle through pastures to so that you're not over fucking up one of them because the cows will just destroy the ground if you leave them in that there's a ratio there's a formula for um how much um square footage you need per cow if if you're and and then a timetable right because there's there's a amount of land that you can throw you throw one count of pasture you don't need to rotate them anywhere there's yeah how many do you need to add before you do right you know if we've got 20 acres here how many cows do we add before oh we need to be rotating every six weeks or whatever it may come come to 700 is a lot earns a lot did you ever well it was i'm probably

remembering more and i know like the biggest groups i saw were like when he and like a couple of his other farmer guys were like sharing pastures and stuff. But I remember as a child, like being blown away by it and like having so much fun, like seeing so many fucking cows run across pastures. And then like knowing like I remember being kind of scared of him when I was like a very little kid because it was like that thing could just barrel over me. And then like it was a cool moment being like when he would be like they look him up say hi and then i remember like i got so comfortable with them that i would be like when the new cows would come i'd be like welcome to the neighborhood like saying hi to him and i'd like pet him on like play with them and it was not play with them i didn't want to play but there's a place in florida that teaches you to fly paramotors and not far from there are huge.

Just I can't even call them pastures. And I don't know how to estimate the acreage. I'll say 15,000 acres. I don't even like miles of field. Anyway, they hate it, hate it, hate it when people fly low over the cows, like within like 100 feet or 200 feet up can you explain the damage that i'm doing to cows by flying 200 feet over them they could miscarry they yeah they they're very easy to scare and stress out and novel uh novel stimuli like spooks them very easily so if it's something that they haven't experienced before you flying

and low over them could could spook a couple of them because they're fragile they would spooks them very easily. So if it's something that they haven't experienced before, you flying in low over them could spook a couple of them because they're fragile. They would spook and make bad decisions like going to deep mud or get a fence. Yeah, Kyle's right. It could fucking miscarry. It could just get so scared. For what it's worth, I'm really good about it, but people aren't.

Oh, fuck it. I'd go down there and kick one in the ass. I don't care. I'm flying low. It would prefer that because if you kicked a kick one in the ass okay i'm flying low it would prefer that because if you kicked a cow right in the ass it'd be it wouldn't look at you like i think we said this before if brock lesnar punched a a bull in the head as hard as he could he'd break his hand on that big flat piece of bone as thick as a as a cast iron skillet did you see that video of the russian punching the camel the other day? I thought, what an idiot who punches a camel.

I'm guessing the camel hated it. He walks up to this camel and fucking slaps him one. Like he thinks he's Arnold Schwarzenegger and Conan the Barbarian, right? The thing mauls

him to death. What? it bites him on the shoulder and picks him up that pussy throws him camel it throws him i don't know how far maybe 8 12 feet and then it runs over there and stomps him a few times and then it starts like biting the shit out of him like mauling him and then it picks him up again and flicks him again. Like it's like grabbing him and then flicking that big long neck. It kills him. You can see the blood on the ground. If there's a video, what's the... It's like a security camera type situation.

Is it in the snow? Yeah. I found it. Yeah, I just linked it. Yeah. We can't share it, of course. Yeah, we can't share it. Most 100% chance they'll wreck us.

Good stuff. He hit the camel and the camel's letting him'll wreck us but good stuff he hit the camel and the camel's letting him slide he is continuing to fuck with the camel now he's wrestling the camel he's on his back up kicking the camel and it's going poorly for him it's going very poorly wow the camel is dominating the camel like kyle said he is picking up dragging him around and shaking him like a dog with a rope toy. And once again, your champion is Corey the Camel. Shaking all comers, any human, any bipedal ape,

he says, I'll take you down in this snowy parking lot. You know, the human was winning the first 15, 20 seconds of the fight. No, that was the couple seconds. The fight hadn't begun yet. That was a couple seconds of the camel being like, what's going on that was the couple seconds. That was a couple seconds of the camel being like, what's going on? And it's like,

I guess we're fighting. And then it murdered it. It killed him. It's at a children's camp is what it says. So like, what did that camel do? Like, why is he?

I don't know. Why is he bullying camels? Yeah. Camels are, it's an animal that everyone understands they're mean, right? Like,

no, they're not mean. I didn't know. They're ordinary, right? No, they're not mean. They're ordinary, right? If it's in the snow, it might not be happy. I bet it's not having a great time and I bet they're not treating it well because I met a camel named Sushi and she was amazing. I thought they were mean. I met a camel at a

petting farm and their lips are almost like fingers. When you feed them, you put your hand flat, and they just sort of pick it up with their lips. Unlike your lips and mine, the two fronts are different sides. They kind of have... Is it prehensile?

They got this vagina mouth where the left side and the right side can do stuff. They work independently to pick things up. I bet a camel can suck some real dick. Oh, yes. I'm not storming that beach oh speaking of sucking dick i thought someone linked me this earlier i guess um i can't wait to see where this goes yeah this oh actually let me just link you like so so that you have you guys have the visual um this this guy's uh i guess he had a blow job on live stream on Twitch.

Accidentally, I'm sure. You know, that's what I thought. That's what I thought. Because the headline reads, he received a one-day ban on Kik. Oh, Kik's a different streaming service, by the way. After allegedly receiving oral sex on stream. So I saw allegedly. I watched it.

Are you just seeing a still image? No, it's a video. I mean, you need to log into Twitter. Oh, I here i got you i got you i've never heard of kick uh that's the place where you know how after after slots got banned or not banned they technically didn't get completely banned just non um some sites like some casinos are no longer allowed but after that they all went to kick is what i could tell oh it's like a gambling streaming site no it's not just for that it's an alternative to twitch but you're allowed to do slots and stuff over there that you're not allowed to do on twitch

so like even like trainwreck he was doing slots on twitch every day and then he went there so i think that's like their alternative to keep slots going. I didn't know. So I read allegedly got a blowjob and then I watched the video and I watch him skull fuck a girl and then come down her throat and her go. Allegedly, allegedly. And then she goes, thanks, daddy. It's like, what do you mean? Allegedly. I just. I don't.

Why can't. So why can't they just make him the king of Twitch? I don't know who this guy is, but it seems like he's doing a great job providing content for people. He does make good content. What did she say at the end? I heard hello, daddy. It was something like that.

Hello, daddy. That would be disjointed. That's not the beginning of their encounter. It had to be something else. I guess I couldn't make out. You know, once you hear something, you can't unhear anything but that. You know, to be fair, Woody, she was sucking dick on Twitch, or not even Twitch.

Her mouth might have been full. I doubt what she said was that profound. I think her mouth was full. I doubt it was like the key to world peace or anything. It was probably just like... I respect her. I like it. You're key to world peace or anything it was probably just like I respect her I like what she's doing making the world a better place

one day suspension you know our boy Finn got more than that right for adjusting his man bra that's bullshit you know fight for Finn hashtag fight for Finn this ishtag fight for Finn. This is bigotry.

This is unacceptable. So Fenster is a good friend of the show. And what he does, he is a cis male. He doesn't. Fenster is a cis male. He's a straight guy. But he cross dresses for Twitch. And he is so pretty that it's dumbfounding.

And he is so pretty that it's dumbfounding. And he was adjusting his bra with his man chest underneath it. And he got banned for female presenting cleavage or something. Yeah. That's your boy right there. That's Finster. That's a guy. That's a straight guy.

Finster sounds a little like this. Yeah, he doesn't do a voice at all. I think he's British. He just totally has a guy's voice. Yeah, it's upsetting. What? For now, Kyle, you just keep needling away. He's starting an OnlyFans. It's only so long

before he figures the voice out, right? You think so? I think maybe he's had... I mean, that's what the image that we just showed there was. I think that was him being like, OnlyFans? Like, that's what he's gesturing toward. And in case you didn't notice, you may have been staring somewhere else with your leering gaze.

I must have been. I must have been. I didn't even notice. I was just enraptured. It is such a funny job that he's like whittled out for himself there where he was like i like to play video games and it's like not anymore now he was all he was a successful minecraft server runner and streamer like this isn't a guy who's like well yes it's this now this is slowly he's transitioned from

a successful streamer youtuber to an uber successful femme girl either i should say he's a trip i learned about this in business school he didn't make a mistake that's really common so one thing that happens is people be like you know what i make water filters and i'm gonna install these water filters in everyone's house and it's gonna be cool and then along comes a business or fucking a fish tank guy or whatever and they start buying your fit your water filters a bad businessman says no this isn't what my vision was it was all about kitchen sinks so take your fucking restaurants and you whatever a good one says oh there's a market here you know i can serve this market if it's coming to me, I do that. That's what Finster did.

Finster had a business. I didn't know he had a Minecraft server, but a Minecraft server is certainly a streaming thing. But then he found a better business and he pivoted. And now he's one of the more profitable streamers on period. And that's the full time. He had a $300,000 donation. Wow. Yeah. He gets a lot of like five figure donations that are from like weird people four figures is noteworthy like of course it is three figures what was the like when was the first time that

he did that for twitch was it just like i'm just gonna he's trans so he doesn't like to talk about it he sort of he sort of morphed into like a he gets prettier first of all like your tattoo let He did that for Twitch. Was it just like, I'm just going to... He doesn't like to talk about it. He sort of morphed into like... He gets prettier. First of all, I like your tattoo. Let me see that. But he's kind of... I thought about getting that exact... Both of them.

You got the feather and the bird. Show me the birds. Okay. You got to turn your arm the other way. I have your stereotypical sorority girl tattoo. Yeah, I almost got that same one. Oh, and choose a connection with nature. your stereotypical uh sorority girl tattoo it's yeah almost got that same one no one chose a connection with nature and with the 35 section of the board yeah but at the time i felt really

cool even though now it's like no it looks good you know i like it i i legitimately do none of us have tattoos we're lame i do that my tattoo every time i see it on jackie in particular i like it i don't know i think it's cooler than renewing your valve they got like avocado halves that is very sweet and his has the pit yeah because it's like the dick i get i don't know we actually went back and forth they're like cute and cartoony yeah zach can you show our tattoos i don't know people have seen it when i was getting this one it was like when i was living in finland and he was like because at the time i was going for engineering degree and he was doing the birds on my wrist and he was like just let me know when to stop and i looked away for like i don't know 45 seconds and he went from here to

here and i was like well that's gonna be long sleeves for the rest of my life pretty much if you look at it mine has the pit and it fits in hers, like boys and girls, I guess. I don't know. I see it every day. I don't know. We

it was kind of on a whim, but it was like a long-term whim. I've been thinking about a tattoo for a decade. i'm so glad you're properly mirrored that would annoy me for like a decade i thought about it and then we were on this weekend vacation and i was like you wanna let's get tattoos tomorrow we started just brainstorming for ideas and uh sure enough we found a place that was open that had good reviews and we did it and it worked out really well. The next morning, we were both like, I can't believe we just got avocado tattoos on.

Yeah. And then that was the last regret. But each of my halves is going to be like the left and the right side of a living avocado's face. So they're just going to be screaming and in pain on each of them. They're going to. Yeah. Is that on your wrist, Paige? Did it hurt?

Yeah. Yeah. I'm surprised you haven't caught the the tattoo bug usually people are like no no woody because when people get their first tattoo they often start like once that seal's broken they suddenly they have a bunch of ideas and they want to keep going so you don't have them no i can't think of anything i like that much exactly yeah yeah so i think it's like you know my body is just such a work of art that like to add some little addendum to it just frivolously seems foolish same my body too but it's like one of those like art pieces where it's a good garbage can and uh it's modern art but it's art all right and i'm

not gonna you don't need to be scribbling in the corner of, you know, your finished, you know. Yeah. Yeah. Now, but I could definitely see getting one. I've considered them a few times and like... Gun to your head right now. What's it gonna be?

Owl. An arrow. It would be like a, like a, like a old timey arrow, like a wooden arrow with feather fletching and brought in like maybe a stone broadhead with like some tied to the back of it like a little ribbon

that droops down and it would be like that long um something like that say say won't say anything where does it go and where are you putting it uh like like right there okay like like right there like pointing down like like down, like toward the end of my hand. It shares a similar vibe to Josh's in my mind. Exactly. That's why I noticed his. Like he has tattoos that I've looked at. Like I have pictures of those tattoos on my phone.

Like not his, because that'd be weird. But like tattoos. Hold still. Looks weird when you're sleeping. The vibe is the thing that I look at the most. Like what is this guy going for? Whatever. The only ones I'm not in love with, for me anyway,

everyone's going to have different tastes, is the people who go super badass. Like, I got a tattoo. It's a snake or a skull with a flaming snake coming out of it. Or, I don't know, look at my giant panther on my deltoid. And I'm like, all right, it's nice. I like it. It's for you.

It's a little much. Because that's a poser tattoo. It's a poser tattoo. And one of the things that everybody hates a poser. Everybody hates somebody who's a fucking poser. And if you do a thing or if you are a thing and you see someone like being a poser in your little world, you spot them right away. And so you know that going in. So, like, don't be a poser in your little world you spot them right away and so you know that going in so like don't be a poser like when i bought my motorcycle jacket and my and my helmet stuff

motherfucker i'm not gonna put no rocket ship on my back it's not the back of my jacket doesn't say like like see you later if anything it's got a flashing light that says don't mind me you know what i mean like i'm not here to be a poser like i want you to know right off the bat hey noob here i'm here to learn i so it doesn't say like demon slayer or like like like or like billy badass on my shit how about it says you're here for a good time not a long time no it's just the opposite it says I'm here for a long time not a good time I'm running around my bike can eat corners alive and I'm just like lazing like I went out today

that was nice did you? Honda 650 something ABS 650R something like that it's a naked street bike it's i don't know it's a 650 cc maybe 649 it's a four-cylinder bike it sounds really nice um it's red and gold um i

like it a lot i love how it looks i would if i had to choose between never looking at it again while it was sitting or never riding it again i think i'd pick never riding it again like i love to look at it i i have thought so many times about wheeling it into my house and just putting it on like like in the corner of the living room just to look at it and i i was so close to doing it multiple times i was just scared to ride it through the living room i did it once parked it in there overnight i was like god damn she looks good i'm cleaning it up house stinks like gasoline when i'm motherfucker motherfucker because and like a couple times i was on your carpet

oh it was all hardwood but like revving that bike up in a house is such a cool noise every time i go through like a tunnel or like under a bridge or something i'd pull in the clutch and hit the throttle it's a requirement i don't think you're being a poser then it's just like you just have to do it every bridge if you can you gotta rev at least are you a big uh biker joshua yeah i have so many bikes i have a ktm 1290 superventure oh i have an 890 nice and then um a 450 uh honda four-stroke i don't know i got a bunch i just a bunch of trails i just back out of the driveway woody is you sound like woody's best friend you should you should woody woody already wants to invite you on his next like like, cross country trip.

Woody goes on these like crazy cross country, uh, adventure bike tours. Um, he's done some group rides. I don't know why I'm telling you his story, but I think I'm better at telling him. Um,

he's done some, he's done some group rides and he's done some like, so he did a solo ride around the holidays where he had a deadline on his return so that he could have Christmas with his family. And knowing that he went where to where woody i went from north carolina to southern california and then back down nevada and then back down to north carolina how long by himself on a fucking whim on that ktm it wasn't the ktm yeah it was it was the 890 uh it was like 16 to 18 days something like that that's the camping the whole time or you know i didn't camp it was it was the 890 uh it was like 16 to 18 days something like that that's the camping

the whole time are you no i didn't camp it was december oh okay fair enough yeah yeah but i do do that i i did camping um for the smoky mountains i did camping for the mid-atlantic back road discovery route the colorado trip um but not that one see i am a poser biker. See, I have that thing. I like to go and go slow. I don't think I've been faster than maybe over a hundred. I usually keep that thing at like 60 or 70 and just cruise around. I don't, I like going slow. I like people looking at me on the bike.

I like, I like, I like, I like going through intersections and how it sounds. I like going slow. I really it sounds. I like going slow. I really am scared to lay that. It's not that I don't trust it, laying it over. My biggest fear is a road hazard sending me into the woods on a corner in Georgia and no one knowing that I skidded off into those woods. There's a lot of like, I could just get flung out into that kudzu if it's like this leaf leafy growth we have here in georgia that's thick and like you'd be you'd be in there crippled like it might cushion your blow a little what if i what if i break my pelvis

and i'm like down there like trying to crawl up a hill and like i can or whatever and i'm down there for you know what i mean i have those thoughts right it's it's a little bit like that. I usually take it real easy. Woody goes on some goddamn adventures that would scare me. Just getting lost out there. That watch is a tremendous thing that you've got. That would make me feel so much safer about

doing stuff like that. A Garmin inReach. There's an SOS button that'll call a helicopter. Does it have a monthly charge? The new iPhones do something like that. What did you say, Josh? Does your little button have a monthly charge you have to pay for? It does.

Here's the story on that new iPhone feature. That is blowing up 911 operator stations with false readings. I've heard. Yeah, it's a real issue. Roller coasters got a big big thing i don't know um i haven't heard about it lately so i wonder if they improved the software or if it's just an old story yeah i i guess i haven't heard about it lately either you would think it would be like a quick

fix but um i i don't know i mean there's a lot of things that like i guess it's an accelerometer maybe measuring g-forces deceleration is it just auto call 911 is that the yeah supposed to do you think you've been in an auto accident okay i guess it you know man but what if you get hit by i don't know i don't know how it works but it was interesting that it was like making all those calls that shouldn't have been made i uh on the motorcycle thing i so i've been teaching my wife to ride a motorcycle and she's a slow learner so we've spent like a good year in the subdivision just like doing u-turns all under like 25 miles an hour i don't need to like pump my own tires but guys i am so

fucking good at like parking lot drills now you need U-turns, figure eights, anything 12 miles an hour and under. I'm really good. Let me ask you this. Can you do it on the big bike? All any bike. I can do it on the Goldwing, the 890. I can do it on a Supermoto. I can do it on a

Grom. I have I don't know how many bikes. I think I have eight motorcycles. I have five. Jackie has three. But I ride them all. But I ride them all. So, like, yeah, any bike.

And with a passenger, too. I can do all those. Oh, my God. Yeah, that's a lot of talent. I've seen, have you ever seen the police department? Yes, they're bad at me. I'm not all those. Oh my God. All right. Yeah. That's, that's a lot of talent. I I've seen, um, have you ever seen the police department? I'm not that good. I would love to try it though. Cause I think I can do the course.

I just see how fast they do it. And that's impressive. So the gold wing is a big, um, like cruiser type motorcycle that has all that shit on it for anybody who's wondering often they'll have those big back seats with a, with a chunky bitch on the back. And,

uh, and like the, they're also what a lot of on the back. And, uh, and like the, they're also what a lot of the police cruisers, certainly on the West coast, um, like, like employ those big bikes. And I've seen where they do.

I don't know if it's, um, if they're just getting qualified or if it's a competition, I think it's the latter, but they're going through very slow, intricate maneuvers. Like not, it wouldn't be measured in miles per hour

because they're creeping along doing very crazy. I'd fall right over. I'd fall right the fuck over. I had to put my foot down when I was getting my license. I put my foot down at least once when I was doing the out and back figure eight thing.

I would definitely drop that goddamn gold wing how much does it weigh probably eight something 858 like it's a lot that's a reference i can pick my bike up you can pick this one up too you don't have to lift it in the air to pick to pick it off the ground you i'm sure you could do it i mean it's so big i mean i can literally get mine up off the ground mine's like 400 pounds or something like that you can just lean back and almost deadlift that bitch but the your bike if your bike fell on you you're in trouble on me would be trained like let's say like the gas tank is right here

i mean usually traps a leg like that's the more common thing i uh but it really traps it i would imagine like that's heavy you would imagine your legs broken and maybe bent like how it's not supposed to be around the bike and you're down in a ditch as well creating even more angle do you have what do you do pull your leg out from under the bike making it do this like rubber band type when i was on the transamerica trail my friend's bike fell on him and i had to pick it off of him and i'm like i can't fathom this his bike was it's a honda 650l if people know what it's like a big dirt bike and uh i'm thinking i could have easily gotten out from under that bike what happened what's there and he's like a full-sized american and i don't know why he couldn't get it off but when i crashed and broke

my leg in colorado off doing the jumps off road i needed a buddy to pull the bike off my broken leg and it's like well i'm glad i wasn't alone took it more carefully when i was so you'd have gotten it off yeah like even if you had to you know i think i'd have managed i mean i my leg was broken and it took months to heal but i also rode a couple hundred miles through the well he's a deterrent like like woody would be one of those guys on the survival show who like did that crate he like yeah that's when i realized i had to cut the arm off i had my favorite knife my features like i always have a knife i was talking about the features of the knife again we can cut it just keep them talking like does your um does your ktm have

like the braces on the side for your bags no uh i use the rack the mosco moto reckless 80 so it just straps on because the 1290 that i have I've taken it up like the super, I don't know, pretty steep, gravelly hill. And as I was going, I did not have enough momentum. And this is like my third day of having it. So, of course, I automatically think I know what I'm doing. So, I go up this steep hill and I get to the top. I run out of inertia and momentum. And then I'm pretty sure I'm going to die at that point because I'm going to come straight back down.

pretty sure i'm gonna die at that point because i'm gonna come straight back down um but then i i've i don't know i kind of like tilted it to one side and just fell underneath it as we both just slid down the hill and the only thing that kept me from being crushed were those little bag holders those oh yeah yeah the pannier racks things the move is you probably know this but if you can if you're failing a hill climb turn right like before you get to a total stop and that way your left foot goes on the hill it's nice and it's easy to reach and your right foot goes on the break and you can just saw the handlebars and point it back down like or you just keep going like stop on the incline and like try and lean well the goal is to like all right i got 10 feet to go and i'm pretty sure i can go three more.

This is our problem. Turn right, and now you can put your left foot on the top of the hill and your right foot on the brake and work your way back down the hill. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. He's turning around. We're going back down. Yeah, you're turning around. We want this thing. This thing goes in one direction.

Yeah, and if you turn left, you don't have the brake and that i mean just put you in a trickier spot yeah there's no reverse i mean so to be fair i was trying to my girl's dad um he rides bikes and i have two bikes and i was like here you go try it out he's like oh i've done this before and so i was trying to follow him and i'm expecting him to be like some boomer that doesn't know how to ride and this dude's kicking my ass and i'm doing everything i can to keep up with him on a 250 on my 1290 which is obviously skill issue right so um oh but wait the 250 is easier to do in this scenario yeah yeah so but at the time i was pretty inexperienced and it was a pretty dumb move on my part but he went up that hill and i'm just like of course i can do that too and then you know i'm just like i hope he realizes that i'm not behind him how long

is this gonna take yeah and so he came back and that's you know helped me lift it up but like i should have done that yeah i was just peer pressure by my girl's dad i don't know it felt kind of bad to be honest it's like i'm getting whooped by this guy my 250 but okay that's super common like something about motorcycling is so technique based that guys who are not nearly as athletic as you might be able to outride you yeah before we it seems there's like there's a lot of different kinds of motor oh you got yeah before we jump to the next thing we're gonna hear from a lot of different kinds of motor. Oh, you got the ads. Yeah. Before we jump to the next thing, we're going to hear from a couple of wonderful, wonderful sponsors.

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Code PKA. Get your... We always recommend the Tadalafil option. information and we thank blue chew for sponsoring the podcast bluechew.com code pka get your your we always recommend the tadalafil option kyle led us down the correct road with that initially and i've never turned back uh but try whichever one you want just use code pka pay the five bucks and shipping and you can see if you enjoy blue chew your dick will be amazing send a picture to kyle show us your results it's going to be incredibly hard. You want to mail those via Woody, of course. Yeah, send them to me. I'll pass them on. He handles my mail.

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be the true blue 100 milligrams of delta 8 put you on your ass and you know potentially scare you if you're not ready level they don't fuck around with people take them take them low and slow nice and easy like a roast like don't don't don't don't be crazy with people. Take them low and slow. Nice and easy, like a roast. Don't be crazy with these. I take three. No, you don't. No way. I got the HHC ones came in the other day, the new shit.

I started with a half. Next day, I took one. Next day, I took two. And yesterday, I took three before I watched that Nick Cage movie. And that Cage movie had me laughing my ass off. Then I did like an hour of The Office trivia, laughed my ass off at that. And then I slept so well. So well.

I take it before bed. I mention this all the time. My tolerance is not going up. I've been taking the same amount for months now. I'm told I need to be high all day and night if I really want to get a tolerance. Yeah, pump them fucking numbers. Don't do that. Enjoy the low tolerance.

Like, if you do what Kyle does, you're going to be chewing through them much faster. But, yeah, they wanted me to specifically mention the HHC ones that you can get at realdbg.com. Code PKA23 for 23% off. The HHC gummies. So, like, apparently they are stronger than the delta 8 gummies because they're both 100 milligrams so if you are accustomed to the 100 milligram delta 8 maybe start a little slower on the hhc since it is stronger yeah so that's what i'm talking about i've tried them i've eaten like six or seven of them or something now um they are stronger it's it's a it's it's more of a giggly high uh i normally aren't one of those people who's like oh this one tastes like lemon

cream pie and it makes me silly oh this one's blueberry dream and it makes me sexy like it's like dude it gets me doped up let's go that's usually what i'm looking for but legitimately i've noticed with the hhc ones i've been like giggling my ass off like to uh to silly movies and shit so um either i've been watching funnier movies or they're legitimately make me feel a little bit gigglier when i eat them um they're slightly stronger for sure what i really noticed was they kick in a little bit faster i feel like it's almost like taking a drink those things are kicking in kind of fast and the delta eight gummies than the death they are yeah when the big well this is these are also death by gummies this is another chemical this is

hhc this is the stuff that i smoke as well i just wanted to be sure we weren't talking about wonky weeds that's why i said so they're well you can still use code pk20 at wonky weeds if you want their vapes and hhc as high as you want but uh code PKA23 works on realdbg.com. You can get the HHC gummies or the Delta 8 gummies. And like Kyle said, like they're both very strong, but the,

and they're both 100 milligrams, but the HHC one is stronger. You don't have to be a hero though. You can get wonky weeds and you're okay. Yeah. Some people, if you want to take it easy,

just go to wonky weedseds, PKA 20, and get yourself a cart, an HHC cart. Or if you really want to start easy, get a Delta 8 cart, because that's probably the lowest one. Yeah, go get a Delta 8 cart, pussy. Do that. Go get one of those pussy carts, bitch boy. No.

Get the one. Kyle's over here vibrating through walls on HHC. Or you can smoke this shit that I smoke that has a... That shit's strong. There's a bear on the cover with bleeding eyeballs.

Okay? Super silver haze. No, it's quite strong. It's like a dopey dope high. The edibles, on the other hand, is more of a giggly

type thing. I like them a lot. They're tremendously strong. Keep an eye on the legal side of things as time goes on. One chemical or them a lot, they're tremendously strong. Keep an, keep an eye on like the, the legal side of things as like time goes on, like one chemical or another is going to get phased out. I would say.

Yeah. I know Delta nine is on the, is on the way out. I think Delta eight is right behind it. No word on HHC yet, but you know, as time goes on, pay attention to your state and,

you know, legal legalization as that evolves. It's crazy how they just like it's thc right it's thc and then they just tell it a joke and now it's delta eight or something yeah they're like all right all right that's illegal new joke i don't think this has it's drug technically i'm not sure that this has anything to do with a marijuana plant that i'm smoking i think this is just like i think hht i'm not sure that's a that's a that's it's i think it's extracted the same way they do all these where they kind of like remove something a little meaningless and then go we made something different i think they added no you know you

didn't it's really come on we pulled out all the water it's not pot anymore it's dry it's a little different with the htc i did some reading the other day i think they they added another another chain to the molecule or something it's it's a little bit different what they've done oh i know it gets me high changes it seems strong yeah it's interesting it reminds me of kind of like the whole sarm situation it's it's like the um you know you can you can use it but eventually people start looking and then maybe they think about it and then they change their mind. But yeah, it seems like it just kind of reminds me of that. Yeah, it's like supplement industry a little bit and the SARMs.

For a long time, with SARMs specifically, there was some, I mean, I guess there's still a lot of stuff that you can get that's kind of borderline. It's kind of out there. And real quick, this episode is, of course, brought to you by Lock and Load, the premium, premium cum supplement,

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These women think you're not even having a good time. Come for more. Come for more. I'll get back to you. It's only been out for a year and a half. How about come all Ye Hateful? Not hateful. It should be happy.

Our viewers are. No, our viewers are named 20 times. They've been hateful. And what about this show makes you think they hate crime? I mean, they hate crime and terrorism and all sorts of of people. They hate crime and terrorism and all sorts of bad things.

They hate tear. Get your cum supplements. Get your cum supplements. You want to talk about that retarded congressman that was all stroked out and then two months into his job and he's checked

himself into a facility? I honestly wasn't sure in the lead-in if we were talking about Weinstein or Fetterman. But now I know Fetterman. Weinstein is. I was talking about his senile. I might have her name wrong. Oh, Dianne Feinstein.

She's like 100. She's ancient. So that guy with the stroke who can't talk, he's not able to perform his duties? Who predicted this? He can't listen. He's refusing to resign, is what he said.

So we'll see how it goes. Refusing to resign? Mm-hmm. After hospitalization for depression. Wait, so you don't think it's depression? No, that's just what the headline that i saw was it was just refuses to look at this fucking ape you know my problem these shorts don't compliment his calves pull them over the knees or drop them down to your ankles but

what he has going on i'm gonna be honest how do those legs support that much man you know there's no leg hair look at this guy, for real. He looks like in Men in Black when an alien would do a poor job of impersonating a human being. Like everything about him. He's oversized to fit a little person who's operating gears. He's terribly dressed because he has no concept of

human clothing or how it should wear. He's expressionless and his and he can't like respond to things well because it's an alien operating I'm not a human fucking being so they're translating in there they're like I don't know I don't know what to say just pretend like we can't Kyle's cry bought it they bought it lord and you people in Pennsylvania thought dr. Oz was too for some why did the Republicans send up Dr. Oz? At least Dr. Oz can hear.

So, Dr. Oz beat somebody else. I forget who. Because he got Trump's endorsement. And a lot of people blamed Trump for losing that Senate seat. They flipped it. Because they put up a weak candidate. A candidate weak enough that Fetterman

could beat him. That's a good one from Zach. You see that? He said that they elected the patient instead of the doctor. They did. That's a great one. Apparently, Dr. Oz was a legitimately good, talented heart surgeon, and he innovated in the field of heart surgery. I thought he was just an old-timey TV guys selling a magic elixir.

Cause that's what I thought he was Dr. Phil, not a real heart surgeon. No, I think Dr. Oz is like a celebrated, talented doctor before. I wonder why that didn't show up in the media at the time.

He had a studio audience come in once with samples of their urine so he could smell it. Yeah. He's like, yeah,. Is that true? Yeah. He wanted to smell their urine to detect something medical. This guy Fetterman, if you can pull up a picture of him again, I just figured out

what I think he looks like. Did Fetterman used to be like 800 pounds? If you look at his body under clothes, he has that extra Fetterman used to be like 800 pounds? I don't know. If you look at his body under clothes, he has that extra skin build. Do you know what I mean? That's not a bad picture.

That's the best. We can't see it in a suit. It doesn't look real. It looks like his flesh is sloughing lower. In the t-shirt, you can tell. 15-104. What's that? You can tell Obama did not want that kind of hand.

I think Dr. Oz thinks that oversized clothing makes you look thinner. That's my theory. So he just buys triple extra. And you know what? That's the most endearing thing about him. I went through that phase too, John. Let me tell you, I can immediately tell that Fetterman has no awareness

of his body, his size, or he's just stupid. All he needs to do right now is take a half step to the left and him and the president can hold fucking hands. Right now, it looks like he just caught Obama. He's going, Thief!

You say thief, I see it it differently and we're hand in hand John Fetterman caught a fish in this picture this is happening he's just showing him off that's what I'm saying he looks like he just caught Obama Obama's like help this guy sucks a big retarded white man has me

he's a big guy who can't speak well or listen at all. Who's in charge of a post that revolves around communication. Some Martian overlords. To me, he just looks like the guy that goes through Costco and just goes to the big and large section and just loaded up on that. And that's just been his wardrobe. I'm sure you guys said, and I wasn't listening, but what are those tattoos it says are those like are those his victims birthdays or something like oh it is something notable like when someone died what did the yeah i'll look it up when

it's birthdays it's birthdays for sure right 5 18 15 it's probably fucking is that where it cuts off it's just passwords these are the launch coats russia has captured senator federman's arm no i was right those are so he was in charge of some district i forget what it was and every time somebody was murdered like there was a violent crime he tattooed the victim's birth date on his arm what a loser what a fucking loser didn't do a very good job did he no he didn't he's all tatted up but the funny thing is y'all are like yeah they started here and they got to there no no no his back is just

he looks like a Russian mobster in Eastern Promises when he takes his shirt off it's just blackness you can't even see it's like the number 23 where they're writing numbers over other numbers like fucking samoan joe coming out fuck that guy fuck that guy so he was a mayor and every time someone was killed in his city that's he'd get their date and the other one is a zip code from where he's from yeah i don't know't know, man. All politics aside,

if you told me... So the real problem is that he's even being... that he's up there. I would think... I would be comfortable with him saying, I'm out. This is my deputy governor or whatever the position is.

This is my second in command here. Fucking Bill. And as long as bill is like semi-qualified right slide him in there and maybe mr fetterman can like help bill along the way and he could be bills he could be mr fetterman's interpreter to some regard but you reach across the aisle let dr don't give me a fucking representative that's literally stroked out that's literally diminished that's literally brain damaged that's now in a hospital hiding because his head doesn't work he can't yeah but kyle why does it matter if elected officials are brain damaged doesn't matter to me but if i was in pennsylvania

i would care i mean i'm look as a as a forced non-voter um i'm a little ashamed of marjorie taylor uh uh she usually she makes a real scene every now and then and they're like yep from the 15th district of georgia and it's like shit what's uh did you see her call for a civil war like a national divorce she called it i i know all about that yep she referred to it's what a lame way to refer to a civil war well she doesn't want a civil war she's like she wants to secede and and but but see and of course it is look this is what people do when they want you to talk about they say stupid ridiculous things so that people who know better will go and say well doesn't she know this that and the other the answer is yes she does because she plays a stupid person on the

internet she happens to be a multi-millionaire who's done nothing but win win win as far as i've seen her i see her on the national global stage out of the 15th district of georgia somehow somehow she's in shouting matches with the president of the united states on a bi-yearly basis i think her strategy is just to polarize yes way to the top. Yes. Thank you. She doesn't want a fucking civil war. She wants to keep running the greater 50. She doesn't want to be a congresswoman of 13 states.

No. She's happy. You really think she's voting? I need less power. That's what I need. I need less power. No. Fuck her. She wants us to talk about it. Stop talking about it. That's why her commercials have her shooting a Barrett.50 Cal and blowing up a car full of Tannerite. I know a little about this.

I know, it's pretty cool. She wants you to talk about her. Well, it's worked, and here we are. Yeah, that's Cal's point, yeah. It works. Intellectually, I know all this. Intellectually, I understand that she's not really trying to govern she's sort of auditioning for the next right wing media position that opens up she's trying to win

elections by super motivating a small base instead of appealing to everybody like i get it but i'm still like this bitch called for a civil war this is like traitorous don't people see it then well it's not traitorous we live in a republic and i i think the state should absolutely be able to see like like what if what if the government what if our government like started um rounding up all of a certain group of people they were like ah we need to imprison anyone who's this color, and they're euthanizing them. Our government's turned against us. We need to secede. I don't know, but let's pretend it's the western states. They've turned evil.

Not the liberal states, not the conservative states. The west went evil on us. We would want to secede away from the west, or we would want to cut them out and push them aside because a war had to be fought because for whatever reason, the whole west coast is now like west coast surfer dude nazis and they're and they're all and they're killing anybody who's like lighter than taupe it does it does feel like they got

kanye like he's not even black enough and it was not tan we we do like all those all those founding fathers were all about them all the time you you know, and they were seceding. So if we're going to be consistent, we got to allow seceding, but only if like the funny part is good for content. You know what? The problem is when you say something like that too, well,

the funny thing is the funny joke that goes back and forth and the game that's played is the other side says, well, let's look at the federal money that goes in and out of the States that would supposedly be seceding oh look at you kentucky 2.8 billion in the hole look look at you louisiana 2.2 billion in the hole and it's like going down there i was like please not georgia we're in the we're in the blue i'm pretty positive i think i think we make more than we take in but most of the south you know is on the welfare system by and large the blue states are supporting the red states sure not exclusively and and there and there i think there might be reasons for that like like maybe the financial sector being in a no

it's just more profitable industries in a lot of blue it seems like the raw goods population it seems like the raw goods come from the red states, and then they get transposed and transformed in the blue states. Isn't that because of... I mean, there would be a lot of government deals for people that do the manufacturing of raw materials. There seem to be a lot of subsidies in that area. I think so. Oh, farmers are welfare divas.

Yeah, so they get all the discounts, and then they ship it to the actual... Where they make the rest of it. Do they pay farmers to throw shit away? They don't know they're socialists. Farmers. They don't realize they're communists, but they are. Well, I mean, the government won't let them operate in a free market anyway. When they start paying you not to grow corn, right?

Like the government's already told you, like, we're not going to work in a free market economy right off the bat because we'll pay you not to make your corn so they're just playing by the rules uh which is what everybody says that's why i've never had an issue with trump's fucking taxes because he's i loved how he handled it in that debate that time he's like it's like i just follow the rules how long have you been in power that you haven't changed those rules yet? Hillary's been in, and he starts talking about how long Hillary's been here in Washington. And rules were the same every year. Every election cycle were the same.

The ones I use, the ones she uses, and the ones those donors out there that are bullying use. And it's like, oh, he's like, that's right. They wouldn't let us have tickets, folks. They stacked the seats with their donors and supporters. And they're out there. It's like, oh, he's like, that's right. They wouldn't let us have tickets, folks. They stacked the seats with their donors and supporters. And they're out there. They boo louder because it's true. That was one of his defining moments, I think. That was a good one.

That was a good moment for him. His best recent one really is that McDonald's clip. Like the spontaneity and conviction that he delivers. Like, I probably know this menu better than anyone here. Actually, I definitely do. I have looked at it. And I what do you even said? Like you if you were to go like Trump interview question one, what's the number seven?

He'd be like two cheeseburgers. Give me something difficult. Like I guarantee you'd be like, what kind i guarantee he would fucking know he'd be like what kind of nuggets do you like he'd be like i don't waste time with nuggets have you ever seen a photo of me with one of course not i wouldn't waste i'm a beef guy like that he doesn't do that and if he goes chicken we know he goes popeyes and he eats it with a fork and knife to spite people online you think he's sitting there on a plane really eating fried chicken with a fork and knife that'd be psychotic if he does that i have to change my

opinion on the guy i'm surprised he deviates from mcdonald's i thought that was just his his lifeblood isn't it he loves it and diet coke right i love sodium what's his diet coke tweet where he's like lots of people mad at me about the diet coke tweet. Doesn't matter. I'll keep drinking that trash. I'll keep drinking that garbage. That's what he said. He had a Diet Coke button on the... What's the desk called? Is it the Resolute Desk? Oh, the Resolute Desk. Or is that a

specific desk that has a name? I think that's the case. I think there's a handful of desks that are in storage. One of them is called the Resolute Desk. You can choose that desk. They're desks that were owned by...

Previous presidents. I think in the West Wing, maybe, there's some talk about that. It was one of those shows where there's a new president. It's like, which desk are you going to go with? Well, I don't know. There's the Lincoln Chestnut. There's the Washington Oak.

It's the desks of former presidents maybe. I'm guessing that the cooler desks are not as nice, right? Like I bet Lincoln's desk from the 1800s is a little plain compared to Sean Hannity's desk. You can still smell Mary Todd's like cunt juice

on it where he banged one out on her. Ew. Yeah. Well, maybe if you were drunk it's oh no like he did it every night it was like you ever see those degenerates unfortunately there's the corner where mary todd would rubber clit on the corner exactly exactly it's worn smooth statues dicks will be polished like fucking shiny the tits too like i like that when you see statues and it's like it's good luck to jack him off and it's like

i love that is it the bulls balls on new york like on wall street yeah wall street yeah is that a good luck totem or something? I've seen a lot of those statues where the tits and the genitals will always be polished up. Oh, and you know what else? This speaks to the beauty in humanity. Dogs. Statues of dogs.

The heads are always petted gold. Oh. Dogs are great. Dogs are awesome. everybody wants to get that good everybody wants to give that good boy a stretch that's the damn look how deep in the crevice that somebody got like they went all the way up there yeah that's where the luck is stored the poor asshole not a bit of attention spent there you don't know what that bull was into. A lot of people on Wall Street making some assumptions.

Yeah, kink shaming. It's not even that cool of a statue if we're being real. It's a pretty cool statue. You ever see a better statue? Is it too small? It's not too small. Zach, show us the world's largest statue. It should dominate the cityscape.

No, Taylor's right. State Puff Marshmallow Man. This is exactly. People should be in awe. I agree. The Statue of Liberty, but with a big set of swinging balls. After they finish it, they get rid of the Statue of Liberty because it's embarrassing to be associated with thank you zach this is the world's largest statue okay get us the stats on this thing zach i think it's it's in indonesia do you know what it is i don't know it no it's it's

a stupid man but but it's the biggest it's the biggest one what i'm saying is that when i was growing up i always heard and it was the 90s to be fair american shit was always the best like like our i thought our shit was the biggest and the tallest and the fastest and the deepest like whatever you could be like it was the biggest strongest biggest fastest always it seems like the last 20 years of my life it's just fucking like the ever when i saw the statue of liberty i was embarrassed i was like this is some French fucking artwork from a hundred fucking years ago. This isn't impressive. And then, you know, when they rebuilt the twin towers and they didn't make it the world's tallest building, I was really surprised because post 9-11 and I mean the week after 9-11, that's all I was hearing.

How like, oh, we're going to fucking build something now. Show them. And I was like, come on, you built a cool building and all but like i don't know i hate seeing um those buildings in dubai and that that look like they're from the future of a cooler race of people yeah see how i mean here's the statue from brazil seems so much bigger wow exactly pull up the one oh but it's on that big like peak in the yeah christo the redeemer this is better taylor okay oh i was just saying because it says the names of them here the statue and here's the other thing that shows how much we are dominated right now we're not even in the top five wow no no it's worse than that because the statue of liberty

is on a huge pedestal that's taller than it is. Look closely. Look where her dress is. And look at that. The one that we're beating by one meter is so much cooler than ours because it's like something sitting down. It's larger. That other one stands up. It's as tall as the dude on the left. That guy's got a sword. The swords are cool. Honestly, the Statue of Unity is tight. If they didn't make it an old grumpy man, they could have made it anything.

He could have a sword. Look at the one that's 108 meters. It looks like some Game of Thrones god that looks in every direction. 102 is also on a tall pedestal, but I think that's the Russian one. Is it like the mother? The Spring Temple.

Is that the one that's celebrating Yuri Gagarin or whatever going to space maybe yeah a garen 100 sure could be he get all i don't know but you're 100 right kyle like this is embarrassing we haven't made a cool show show us the skyscrapers like not just like like like like i think like by tallest buildings and uh and like i mean if you start looking at cities with a couple million in them, it gets real embarrassing. At least the St. Louis Arch is bigger than all of those. We have that victory.

I don't think so. We're the biggest man-made monument in the country. I just double-checked so I wasn't unsure. We're 30 feet taller, the St.. Louis Arch than the Statue of Unity. Think about what an arch is though. Oh, it's not nearly as cool. There's not even a guy. The Statue of Unity is the India one. Was that the biggest

one? That's the biggest one. So the St. Louis Arch is bigger than the biggest one? Yeah, the Arch is bigger. What is it like to go on the Arch? It's really not that exciting. The elevators are dangerous. How does it work really not that exciting the the uh the elevators are dangerous how does it work that sounds exciting you get in you get in a little capsule with like these white plastic seats i haven't done this in like 18 years for a field trip and then you go in you have to sit down

in the elevator and then as you're going up you can like feel it moving laterally also kind of like going up the side of the arch and then you get to the top and they have a bunch of windows and like it's just a hill and so like you can like walk across it it's really nothing special at all but it looks kind of neat i imagine it's like one of those when you go to the bank hit up the bank teller you just hop in one of those and just shoot straight to the top sort of is that how it works that's a base that's basically what it is yeah you just shoot to the top and then you go neat taylor you've been up in the sears tower i don't believe i've been up in the sears tower no oh that's a that's a that's next time you're that's the one in chicago right yeah yeah it's not called the sears tower anymore no it's the willis it's yeah is it the willis tower now or was it the sears tower i'm not sure it's no longer

the sears tower in any um i know. It's no longer the Sears Tower. I know Woody's been up there because I've been up there with him. They've got a place where you can walk out. There's glass below you and glass all around you and you're just sort of stuck out over the side of the Sears Tower. Dude, you are so

goddamn high. It's a cool look. Oh, that's us. Look at me looking friendly. Irresponsible. You had the best shirts for a while. Dude, that was pretty cool.

Am I wearing mandals? Can you bring that picture up again? Don't you still wear mandals? No, I don't have them. I have flip flops, I i guess or sandals but like not with the strap on the back i thought um i picture that as part of your uniform walking around in mandals no the internet beat that out of me in like 2013 you bullied me out of my preferred shoe wear i think they did i think those are just sandals

but it's weird i got some custom air forces on that day some custom air forces hell yeah oh nice damn how old were you in this photo kyle i guess that was 2012 26 27 something like that how high up are you right now like you walked out you can look right below your feet pretty five i don't know more i think maybe 700 i don't know i don't know i'm sure it's easily googleable googleable was there any sense of hesitation when you're like yeah because like like that's not like the only one that like the whole room is lined with little um alcoves i guess i'll call them it's 1 300 feet to the i don't know if that's to where we're standing though i would imagine that's like the top of the radio tower or something but you know you were seeing everybody

do it including like children and they were like running around and stuff so you just did it was there like a maximum people sign for the little ledge i was a little nervous like i even though i had seen people stand on it before me and i'd seen people stand on the parallel ones and the other ones you're still taking a step out onto the glass there was you know i probably hit it but i definitely felt it in my heart you know i was like this is a little sketch yeah my hands get really sweaty when i get high up like even if it's something like that where i know i'm safe like i'll i'll notice my hands getting getting sweaty yeah i don't i don't deal with it super well it's kind of embarrassing like i'll get wiggly i'll get a

i'll get i'll get like such an adrenaline dump that i i get the shakes um and it like i've got to like slap that out of my hands like like if i'm actually trying to like do a thing up a tree or like when i was a kid i was so scared i don't know why my camera keeps creeping away when when i fly oh sorry i didn't mean to interrupt okay i was gonna say when i would have to climb these trees when we were hunting and i was like 12 so my you know my dad's 38 42 something like that i'm 12 and uh he's like yeah get up get up there get up that tree it's like early morning but the sun hasn't come up yet and like he needs to get me up my tree then i have to drop like wheel my gun or my bow up with a string and then he goes and finds

his own tree somewhere else and he can begin his own but he's got to like babysit me a little bit make sure i get up the tree and i'm up there and i'm just fucking shaking fucking higher and higher and he's like higher higher they'll see you there fucking shit we were in a situation where like the land wasn't flat so like if the land's flat the tree can go straight up and like if i go up 20 feet i'm 20 feet from everything around me but because the land was like this oh yeah i have i can't go 20 feet up the tree i've got to go like 40 feet up the tree and it's this really tall like oak tree and just up and up and up and up and those things don't bite well in those so when you put your weight on it it would slide a little like that you'd

lose you'd lose an inch or two every time you bit down higher and i'm just shaking and i'm you and you've got to climb with your hands you're climbing oh those are some of the scariest fucking times ever i was just real scared of that shit and when i when i would finally get there i'd just be fuck i'd be so happy to sit down is there anything that spooks you more than that? Like a common fear, perhaps? Hmm. Like, I would much rather deal with heights than the thought of being out in, like, open ocean. Oh. If I'm out in open ocean and there's, like, a gun next to me, I think I'd take the easy way out.

Like, I can feel myself. We're hanging on to it. I would absolutely panic. Like, I would be the easy way out. I can... We're hanging on to it. I would absolutely panic. I would be hyperventilating. The thought of not being able to see land and being in a boat or in water and then all of Satan's minions below waiting to eat.

I'd rather climb Everest. I'd rather be lost in the woods in the demonic Japanese suicide forest. I'd rather live there for sure for sure yeah i agree i'd rather be the tour guide of like check out hikoro fresh like i think it's really cool to be like in the ocean and not see land and swim around like that that's that shocks me that is the scariest thing i can imagine i could float around but thalassophobia i couldn't do i don't know if you guys heard of that but like

we know that is yeah okay fear of the deep and the unknown that's not a that's not an irrational fear that's an acknowledgement of the visuals that correspond with it are very triggering when you see like um one of those um underwater caves where you've just got like a round opening in the water is just crystal clear blue and you can see 450 feet down to the bottom. It's like, man, jumping in this feels like killing myself almost. It's so deep. It's unnerving.

Just the roiling waves of a stormy open sea are one of the most powerful things that you can visualize at a whim. When you see those giant waves and those like like the ships crash headlong into them it's so incredible like that's problematic like i love those videos i love the videos i've and i've been in those seas on a cruise ship but um yeah just

like big shit that like i don't know if it went over the nose, like the best of the videos do, but it like way towards the nose, way up in the, the windows on the side, like my, my cabin was normally up and you could see out the windows. But as the waves came by now we're underwater,

right now, the waves are covering and your room is below the sea. And I thought that was pretty cool. I was happy with that situation. I went out to the deck to get sprayed and everything. There's a movie. The original is called The Poseidon Adventure.

The remake in 2006 with Kurt Russell is called Poseidon. The premise is that a cruise ship is hit by a rogue wave and it flips upside down. This movie fucking blows. It'll be better the way Kyle tells it. Yeah, tell it.

You'll redeem this. Cruise ship flips upside down, right? And obviously it's flooding the ship and so they're making their way upside down to the bottom of the ship and so they got they're making their way upside down to the bottom of the ship they've got to head up up is down now right so like things don't work the same way so we're going through elevator shafts and water's always coming up and kurt russell is at this time i'm

gonna he's still like muscular like dad kurt russell like like he can handle some business you know what i mean from soldier i yeah yeah like i don't think he's got quite the soldier physique took entire year like he he he got proposed that movie and he was like i need a year a year to get in shape for that and he did he came looking good he didn't get all roided up or anything like hugh jackman but uh but he he got an impressive physique i love soldier all right well if you're gonna shit on poseidon then i won't tell the story anymore, but it's interesting. I was listening! Oh, that's it! That's it! They've got to work their way up to the...

That's the premise. Capsized, upside down, cruise line up. I don't understand the endgame in this, because you're trying to get out of the ship, right? Ideally, you'd stand on the bottom of it. It's never going to flip back over. But if you work your way to the bottom of the ship, it's like, ah, little known fact.

There's a trapdoor on the bottom of the ship it's like ah little known fact there's a trap door in the bottom of the ship to get out there's no crews are coming you know rescue crews are obviously coming because you know a cruise liner's capsized like they're coming they're gonna be cutting holes in the bottom like like at pearl harbor that's what happened you know you had maybe the arizona there were guys down there alive for days in the arizona it's a that's real sad stuff they're just down there in that blackness. And, oh. They didn't have people to save them, I guess?

They cut some of them out. Some of them they weren't able to get to. Is your fear surrounding the sea and the deep to do with creatures? Because I would happily swim in a million foot deep Great Salt lake or dead sea where nothing lives there like that would not bother me one iota as like as long as not waves to like

drown me yeah it's the creatures of the deep that's scary it's not just the creatures of the deep it's it's like the unknown part like like yeah i don't know i don't know what could be down there or out there especially in a storm i imagine everything goes down below the storm but like i just imagine like like some demon fish down there it's like oh look a human he's in the storm let me terrorize him maybe the devil himself just sees me up there wants to fuck with me it's it's huge oh yeah that something's gonna grab when i was in the me down when i was in the lake of the ozarks when i was like 10 years old and i was like knee boarding or whatever and like i fell off and i was bobbing in the Lake of the Ozarks when I was like 10 years old and I was like kneeboarding or whatever. And like I fell off and I was bobbing in the Lake of the Ozarks, which is fucking not clear water.

And like I felt something like suction on my foot and then go away. And it scared the absolute shit out of me. Like I was so scared sitting there waiting for the little boat to turn around and pick me up that that stuck with me. I remember telling my brother, I'm like, something grabbed me. Something sucked on me. Are there things that you did?

Emotional damage. Can you think of any things you did when you were a little bit younger or maybe even a kid that you're like, I would never do that now because that is so scary or dangerous. Can you think of anything? a little bit younger or maybe even a kid that you're like, I would never do that now because that is so scary or dangerous. Like, can you think of anything? Because I'm thinking right now, and this wasn't even that long ago, when I was at that lake house in Gumlog,

I had these two ladies down by the lake and I would jump and we were all in the water off my dock and it was nighttime in muddy Lake Hartwell water and you know the docks there were floating in the water like you put your hand on the side of the dock you know and you can kind of tread water and we're all just hanging out there like getting kissy or whatever and i would swim down and it was like multiple strokes right like the water changes temperatures twice and you get to mucky muddy silt and then i would come up slowly letting my like air bring me up so that i could i wouldn't like so i could grab them and scare them basically i'm thinking about that now i don't want to swim down there i don't want to swim down there dude

fuck what if what if i get oh i don't want to swim down there. I don't want to swim down there, dude. Fuck. What if I get, I don't want to swim down there. I'm scared thinking now. Like, why did you swim down there? Have you got a snapping turtle? Realistically, the worst thing would be a gar. Yeah, those are gross. That's what happened to me. Similar to Taylor, I was tubing in Lake Altoona, I think, in Georgia,

or kneeboarding, whatever. And we got off, and then I got one of these little clear inflatables and I was just kind of paddling around the shore. And one of those Aligars comes up and just looks at me under the fucking tube. And I actually, I just scream like a girl. My parents are on the boat looking at me.

They're like, what's going on? And I thought at the time it might've been like a legit, um, alligator. Cause I didn't understand the concept of Aligar. It's time. Yeah.

Zach, show us an alligator gar. Well, they're mean looking they're trashed fish yeah normally yeah what'd you call it a trash i don't think you well they eat garbage on the bottom so i've seen them with bigger teeth than that yeah like they eat fish they do i thought they did i thought any fish with teeth like that it's not gonna do much to a person person, though. No, but it's scary to see. And I don't want to encounter it 12 feet deep or 15 feet or wherever the fuck it was. You're in his. They follow you.

They're curious. They followed me around. It followed me for a good 15 minutes after I screamed. It's weird. And the fact you have no domain, no ability to traverse the water like everything else can. This is more what i was like afraid of um than than that previous thing yeah yeah i've swam with like hundreds of wild dolphins or i can't tell the difference between a dolphin and a porpoise but you know one of those and there's a

certain like fuck you know what's gonna happen in this situation whatever they choose that that's how this goes down me versus 200 dolphins my will is inconsequential oh 100 like imagine all the dolphins laying on like a football field you're gonna run for a thousand yards if you want like that's the same equivalent is i will be the nfl's leading rusher if the other team is all dolphins. Just kicking them in the face as you run by. Deer farming, fucking flipper. The worst sport, everyone hates it. It's dolphin football.

It wasn't asked for. No one requested it. These billionaires are out of control. Kyle, do you have a topic on your tablet there there I do It's a TV show starring Sylvester Stallone That's very good Tulsa King

Tulsa King Have you watched any of Tulsa King I'm at least two maybe three I'm about three episodes in Here's the premise of Tulsa King Sylvester Stallone was a Nework mobster he just did 25 years because he wouldn't like tell on his boss or whatever he gets released from prison right at the beginning um he's got he's got some voice over why you see him getting like released from prison

it's funny it's like good stuff um he's got some good lines in there and right away it's like okay he's gonna be kind of a wise zealot smart funny kind of guy and he is um and he gets he instead of taking him to like uh a mobster reception at the at uh scores the strip club he's like we're not going to scores there's no party he's like nah long island oh okay we go to a house whose house is this they didn't say he's getting scared and like he's basically walking the room like prepared to die We go to a house. Whose house is this? They didn't say. He's getting scared. He's basically walking in a room prepared to die.

It's not even that good of a news when he gets in there. It's not death. They're like, look, there's nothing here for you anymore. There's nothing here for you. He's like, I just gave you 25 years of my life. My family won't talk to me. There's nothing for me. It's like, Tulsa. I'll give you Tulsa. Fucking Tulsa.

You're exiling me. Look, I've given you your whole fucking city. You get a whole fucking city. Now get out of here. That's basically how it ends. And I'm like, okay, so he runs Tulsa, Oklahoma now? Yeah. He does. But the thing is, there's no mobster network in Tulsa, Oklahoma. What they're saying is, we okay you going to Tulsa and taking over. So you have to make your own enterprise. He rolls into town, because he's missed the last 25 years or whatever,

and he's 75 years old. He doesn't know anything about like the iphone or anything and and like like he's almost getting into a fight with his cab driver because the guy says he looks like a gangster he's like don't you say i'm gonna look like a gangster did you ever say i look like a gangster he's like nah man i just mean you look cool and all you think being a gangster's cool well yeah i guess you know slick with it hot that's what i'm saying all right then like he's getting ready to like pimp slap his black driver. They drive past a medical marijuana dispensary.

And he's like, what is that? He's like, it's a weed store. Pull over. Pull over. He walks in there and basically strong arms them. He beats up the guard. He tells the guy, take me in the back and show me your books. I'm your partner now.

And, like, you know, like, threateningly, he just assaulted the guards. The guy shows him the books. He's like, you made $500,000? Where are you keeping that money? He's like, the bank. He's like, I know you're not keeping it in the bank because then the feds can get it. Where are you keeping that money? I don't have it.

He's like, look at these shoes. The corner of these shoes are very sharp. Very sharp and very hard. I'm going to break it. Who are you keeping that money? I don't have it. He's like, look at these shoes. The corner of these shoes are very sharp. Very sharp and very hard. I'm going to break three of your toes if you don't tell me where that safe is. We both know it's right there.

He gets up and he opens the safe and there's this giant pile of money and he peels off like $100,000. He's like, alright, I'll see you in a hundred thousand and he's like all right i'll see you in a couple days he's like that's all you're taking like i told you we're partners now i'm gonna look out for you that way if the any of the gangs or the criminal element comes in here he's like there's never been any criminal element to you hey what are you a smart aleck you listen i'm protecting you and he just protected you from people like me. Like me.

There's more coming. There's not, though. He's the problem. But he walks out of there with this man's money and gives the driver half of it and is like, go get me this car and hands him a page out of a magazine. He's like, you want a Lincoln Navigator? Yeah, a black one with all the shit in it.

A Lincoln Navigator. The coolest a black one with all the shit in it. The Lincoln Navigator. The coolest of SUVs. I don't know if it is. It's fucking sick. They're nice, but that's a weird request. The first couple episodes are him like, it'll get you started. Especially if there's an assault involved.

I don't want to spoil that, but there's another beating at the car dealership that I'll gloss over. I hope so. There's a severe beating at the car dealership. You think you're the assassin? I'm the assassin. It goes like that. But then just him trying to put his money in his bank account. They're like, well, you need ID.

I was like, here you go. This expired in 1993 like shit um well i don't have any well you have to go get some and him like going through the process of getting a driver's license and of course he like turns to the left they're like what are you doing what are you doing no it's it's cute and it's funny but it's violent at the same time um and and like he takes everybody plays the roles like seriously it i think there's going to be death and murder um there's a sylvester stallone pulls off being physically intimidating at 75 honestly he does he's big and bulky and uh

there's a scene where he fucks a woman and then afterwards um she's like uh how old are you he's like ah come on. What do you want me to say? You might as well be asking me, where were you when Kennedy was shot? She goes, where were you when Kennedy was shot? I was a senior in high school. She goes, that would make you 75. He goes, I got to go gotta go i gotta fucking go and like gets disgusted with him

and rolls up out of there and he's like oh he's like will i will i see you later maybe tomorrow when she's just like and she like closes the door and she's gone but lately it's kind of a sad no you geriatric yeah no it's it's fun i like it a lot septuagenarian yeah it sounds about right septuagenarian if you're in your 70s rather than octogenarian up in your 80s right true fact um i like it i like it a lot i'm gonna watch some more probably probably tonight without surprised without spoiling it do they leave room for season two is there a season coming i'm not through season one um but i would imagine so uh i think that it's produced by that same guy who makes the yellowstone stuff sheridan something yeah i forget his first name well regardless that guy um this show and

that other show with renner jeremy renner the hawkeye guy who like almost lost his leg recently he's got that show that's like Mayor of Something Town or some shit. He also produces that. I think they're all supposed to be in the same universe. It'd be fun if you saw some crossover stuff happening. Kingstown.

I am simultaneously addicted to the Yellowstone universe and disgusted by the Yellowstone universe. It is so stupid and lame and it is i mean yellowstone in particular they've just been fighting billionaire landowners from california you know those liberals uh for five years now get into their plot jesus fuck like this is the only thing you got? Someone's trying to buy your land? Steal it? No, I get it.

I don't think they're going to have any other bag. I wish they would just expand. I heard it's going to end. Kevin Costner doesn't want to do it. Kevin Costner's people came out and said this isn't true, but the rumor was he was filming in one week and then they're like no no we'll work harder than that and one week

specifically the rumor was they had like 50 days to do the whole thing and they did like 45 days on the first half of the season so he's like get your shit done and then they said that wasn't true so yeah that's definitely not true like production times especially on a big show like that with all the animal stuff it's got to be a couple of weeks per episode at least like star trek the next generation was two weeks per episode to give you an idea and like and it's way more controlled they're able to set everything up yeah like yeah they got like three sets animals or you know sometimes things that are weather related or yeah i watch a lot of like star trek uh behind the scenes stuff and they said we did everything in three takes usually just one take we go in there

we do what do you think about this mr wolf i think we're in trouble captain right then scene all right we got it right we got it, right? We got it, right? Fucking lunch. They just roll. I heard Scorsese's like that, I think. I might have messed it up. No, Clint Eastwood is like that. Eastwood is the guy. If you need a second take,

he's like, what, you fuck it up? What do you suck? One take. I don't know. Eastwood makes good movies. They say he doesn't do a lot of takes. I haven't seen the one that he made about the Atlanta bombing thing. Remember we had the Olympics in Atlanta and there was a bombing. They got the wrong guy. And they got the wrong guy right away.

And the media got carried away with it. I'm blanking on his name. Richard Jewell, I think. Thank you. That's the name of the movie as well, I think. And look, I was a kid. was 96 so i was 10 but i remember this vividly how like oh it was this they got him it was that guy he's like all over the news and it's like this is the guy who tried to blow up the fucking olympics meanwhile he's the fucking hero cop who came in like paul

blart looking like paul blart too but he's the guy who was like came in like Paul Blart, looking like Paul Blart too, but he's the guy who was like, bomb. And he's like, get everybody out of here. Probably saved lives. Like got the bomb defused, got it out of there.

It never went off. Saved the fucking day. Needed him on one of those hijacked planes on 9-11, but he couldn't because they ruined his fucking reputation in 96. And so that's what the Clint Eastwood movie is about. It's about him. I don't understand. It's sad, but it's good.

I haven't seen that many of Clint Eastwood's directing. What has he done other than Gran Torino that he directed? The World War II one. Is it Flags of Our Fathers? Or is it something of of Our Fathers?

Or is it something of Iwo Jima? Ghost of Iwo Jima, maybe? He made a World War II one. I think it's from the Japanese perspective. That's really good. Oh, that'd be cool. But I'm spacing on the name, I think, maybe. I remember the Mule.

I think Sully. Unforgiven. We're skipping out on. Million Dollar Baby. Oh, oh yeah with hillary swank i'm so outclassed in movie discussions i haven't seen any of these well i'm cheating you've never seen million dollar baby that's like a break ridge it's a boxing movie heartbreak ridge is great so that's so that's when clean is clint is like that like still physically imposing age of like maybe 45 or so and and, and he's like muscular.

He stayed muscular his whole career. If you look at, there's a movie where I'm called space Cowboys where, where he goes to space as like a 70 year old man, he's got bicep veins. But anyway, going back to the other thing, heartbreak Ridge,

he's training some soldiers and he's got his own like squad or whatever. And it's, you know, it's the classic cliches he's like there's like a slick guy with cool glasses and he steps on the glasses and everybody's like a jokester or whatever and he like kicks kicks their asses makes them a fighting unit and then they end up in some half-assed battle slash war and maybe like south america or something and so you get like some explosions some battle and some moorah shit.

It's good. It's okay. It's like an action movie. Who's a, who's your favorite director? The best one. All time. All time.

That's hard. Stanley Kubrick. Stanley Kubrick. That's a good answer. I like Nolan. That's who I would have guessed. You like Nolan. Well,

because he does all his vfx practical if he can that's his thing he will like that scene in inception where they're like on the walls walking he built a rig that literally just turns the room and they walk through it and so he's really cool yeah that's why i like i enjoy that too um i i think that um what he does with the camera is really cool. And I like that it harkens back to like older school stuff. I like that he likes 70 millimeter and he goes through the expense

and the time and the effort of shooting in it. What's his next movie? The next movie is called Oppenheimer, right? About the creation of the nuclear weapon. I'm gonna go the fucking hour drive to the 70 millimeter place. We've only got one in Georgia and I'm gonna go the the fucking hour drive to the 70 millimeter place we've only got one in georgia and i'm gonna go watch it in 70 millimeter just like i watched hateful eight in 70 millimeter i watched interstellar in 70 millimeter um it's a different experience um

it just looks different i wouldn't say it's like groundbreaking or anything but for me it's worth driving an hour and or maybe just i'm just a douchebag and I want to say I did it but I watched Hateful Eight twice once they had it in focus and once they didn't that's the drawback of 70mm what do you mean it wasn't in focus? they just played the whole movie out in focus so everything that you've probably ever watched in a theater was like a big

digital projector unless you go back to maybe when you watched Jurassic Park as a kid maybe they had reels of film but it's been a digital projector for a long time where they go boop and a movie gets shot on the screen. It's like you would at home, but bigger and fancier, but he's shooting in 70 millimeter, which is a very wide film stock. 35 is what's used a lot. I think eight is like what you do in like a home real zippy zip camera um but 70 is uh is a very dense very wide film stock that captures a ton of information a lot of depth of color and diversity of color and it's a it's an incredible and it's very wide it's a very wide um

shot and uh they've got to focus it with a lens up there. There's a little bit of like, I don't know. You've got to be a projector, projectionist, not just a button presser. So if you don't have a projectionist, you've got a button presser. It's out of focus. I've never been to the theater. I'm imagining like a drive-in theater, but inside that kind of size. It's at the Mall of Georgia in Buford. It's about 40 minutes outside of Atlanta.

It's a standard theater. I mean, it's a big IMAX theater. When I say standard, I mean, the seats are the same. It's just a bigger room. But it is an enormous IMAX screen to watch it on. That sounds pretty awesome. I haven't seen a movie in IMAX like since like probably since like high school i watched avengers endgame um that's the last

one i watched in imax uh i wanted to see that and that and uh but but i i used to watch a bunch i think i had like the crown club card for like a couple years in a row and i was like we're gonna get our money's worth and like i would go watch two movies a day um i'm already like like uh one of those unethical life uh pro tip guys were like when i was like 18 16 17 18 when you've got a car but no morals yet or or like tons of readily available income you go to watch one movie and it's like well now we're here like why not watch two movies right like so i would always just stay and watch a second showing of like a different movie i never

did that i i i didn't want i don't want to sit down and watch two full movies back to back theater yeah i that's a lot of sitting still this is it's hard to sit still for this fucking show for four hours straight you gotta you gotta move around a little bit you're not tapping your feet all the time i'm always moving i got my legs crossed here i'm just i'm in my zone here this is my comfort zone when i'm gaming in here i'm in here for 12 hours sitting here like like i do this thing with my neck where i do this and that and it goes because i'll sit here for fucking three hours straight and not move. And then I'll remember and I go, Oh yeah,

don't turn it. Don't turn it. And I'll be like, if I turn it, it'll like twist up and fucking not. No, I think I take my gaming seriously. I spent a lot of time in here.

You're not even. Yeah. The last thing I was playing. It's not a way to, let's playing... It's not AoE 2. Let's see. It's not The Last of Us, but it should be if you're that into the show. I think, right? I feel like that's what I should do after.

Well, just after watching it, I feel like I should play it. Because I had the idea. I played the very beginning of it, but then I had to move. So I didn't have my PlayStation anymore. But now that I'm watching it, I'm like, I just want to go back and play it. So I don't know. You should.

I played a tremendous amount of escape from Tarkov, uh, in January. Um, I would guess I was spending 60 to 75 hours a week playing, um, for about, um,

for about 32 days, I think till I maxed my character out. And, uh, then I quit that. Uh, but before that I've been playing dark tide, which is a Warhammer 40 K, um, game yeah it's an unfinished game um but um i played that awfully

religiously too i maxed two characters out in that anybody that listening knows that's tremendous duty to be done yeah so i get real obsessed with games or with any sort of like hobby that i get into i get kind of obsessive about it and if i'm not doing it then i would just be thinking about doing it anyway or i'd be researching how to do it better like how to play the game better or how to strategize i'm i'm avoiding playing the stupid game that taylor is playing which is aoe 2 oh it's like a 15 year old game taylor and i's pcs cost more than vehicles it's's a game from 1999. Let me finish my thought.

Taylor and I's gaming setups cost more than our first vehicles that we drove down the road. And yet, he wants to play a game that probably runs on an iPad. It is. So the reason... Josh, have you played Age of empires before of course the franchise age of empires 2 it's one of the best known rts games if you like real-time strategy style games then you love aoe too it's a very fun complicated game it has a wider broader tech tree than any other rts i'm biased towards it

because like you know starcraft very cool probably starcraft 2 is the most popular rts out there today it's wildly popular still i i'm not as into the alien side of it as like all the sieves of the aoe to uh two side where it's like i can play as the hindustanis i can play as the franks the britains the garjaras the the vikings the vietnamese like there's it's like I can play as the Hindustanis I can play as the Franks the Britons the Gujaras the Vikings the Vietnamese like there's it's and they all play differently and it's so fun and like managing the different economies like I'm having a blast at it

and trying to get better with build orders and shit and Kyle just thinks it's lame and I don't think that's fair I think like it's not about the newness of the game or the graphics or anything it's about and you know the reason AoE 4 didn't suck me in is because they got rid of a lot of the complexity. They got rid of a lot

of the stuff that made AoE 2's build up. They simplified a lot of it and I don't like that. Not that... I'm not even good at AoE 2. I'm not even good. I just have a fun time playing it. It's a great... I'm learning build orders

now i'm really good at fast castle into nights not really good but serviceable at it like i'm just having a great time playing kyle you would you would have so much fun with us if you played me you know what it feels like all playing you'd have a blast with us dude you remember you know um you're good at these uh these old-timey vocabulary words. There's an old musical instrument where you rub your fingers over glass. If you hadn't said that, I would know. The glass harmonica. I know it.

The problem is I know it too. If you gave me multiple choice, I'd immediately be like, B! But I'm not. Anyway, what you're asking is me to come along to your music class where you learn to play that it sounds like frenulum i want to say frenulum but i know that's silly i know i just

i play the frenulum i know you're great at that oh amazing i'm a fucking artist fucking or as the commoners call it the skin flute but but that's what it feels like it feels like you want me to go to your silly like like you didn't even learn like a harpsichord class for example you want me to learn some stupid instrument that won't get pussy attention or money like you know what i mean it's like dude no no look taylor i'll learn an instrument with you guitar or piano you know that's the fucking core ones like that's how you get pussy money and attention one of those i understand you're serviceable and you can play a little john uh john mayer fucking at a party oh dude those high

schoolers they fall for that every time i understand those high schoolers those those gullible 15 year olds right like i was like oldies to them your body is i don't know anything about that shit did you write that 98 is that 98 degrees i'm like i wrote this about you body is one why do you think i got my guitar i haven't heard of john i know two chords no i disagree no that's true you you have a fundamental enjoyment of strategy game you like it and you would have fun with it. The problem with this game...

This game was released before the simplifying of games. I just argued the point that he's trying to get me to learn the hearts of the court. He wants me to come with him and learn the hearts of the court. He's pitching this game from the 1960s at you. Kyle,

you're going to love it. It's before games got needlessly complicated. No, no, no. I have alternatives that check every box. I have alternatives that check every box. I have alternatives that check every motherfucking thing. I think the depth is there. You could just play

Inventory Simulator. That's called Tarkov. You could play Inventory Simulator or you could play Tarkov. Yeah, you could play Inventory Simulator, or you could play a more fun game like AoE 2 where you're managing a lot more. Warhammer 3. Warhammer 3. I like the economy part of it.

I like having to balance my production with an economy, and with Warhammer, it's fun, but it's just selecting an army based on the amount of gold you have. I like having a build order plan where it's like, what am I going to focus on economically in order to facilitate an army push in this way? What civ is my opponent playing? I need to scout out the front of their base,

see what their production buildings are. You're describing Warhammer. You're describing Warhammer. No, you don't check for production buildings anymore. I'm playing Dwarves. I'm going to play the fucking Dwarves. You're going to play the fucking High Elves. And you're going to be like,

oh, ho, ho, that's a lot of armor, but not a lot of mobility. I'm going to need chariots. I've got a limited amount of gold i have got to bring chariots but i need a front line oh my god now that i've got a front line and three chariots how am i gonna afford a general i've got to get the captain of the guard but i can't have him just walking let me put him on the pegasus like you're gonna you're gonna put a build order together like i've played it also like but you don't do it again you don't see your opponent's army pick before the beginning of the game and so you are picking what you think the meta will be about what you're anticipating facing in aoe2 or rts is

like starcraft you're actually scouting figuring out what their production buildings are then manipulating your economy to facilitate the production of units that will counter that tell me all the uh tell me all the great things about goldeneye while you're at it buildings are than manipulating your economy to facilitate the production of units that will counter that. And that's fun. Tell me all the great things about Goldeneye while you're at it. It's a tremendous game as long as you don't have a fucking odd job in your group. I'm not going to play Goldeneye on my fucking Rolls Royce computer over here either.

I made the point, Woody, that our PCs cost more than our first vehicles. And he's wanting to play a game that'll run on an iPad. It's such a fun game, dude. It's got a 1440 GPUpu he can fucking run real life at 80 frames dude you like this is the same argument i could make about movies i could be like oh why do why do i need to watch uh unforgiven oh i don't need to watch unforgiven that's a that's a complete fallacy skyrim is so much more than this all right the fact that you're on to that argument means you've lost you've lost if you

went to that argument now the fact that you're ascribing that to me they got skyrim to run on a digital pregnancy test and me and taylor's playing a game that's less demanding than sky you guys don't you got you're just fundamentally not understanding what i'm saying it's not it's not about the newness it's not about the graphics it's about the complexity and the strategy and it's fun there's no other game that scratches that itch you got poor vavity and those other guys playing that old-timey ass game learning the harpsichord with you when they should be getting all their life skills together and and fucking learning a man's game a man's game dude if you if you played like five games with us i guarantee you would have another on your monitor a build order and you would be getting good at it quickly taylor because you like strategy games i looked into what it would

here's the other thing we should play horgan trail on your get good at it. Here's the other thing. We should play Oregon Trail on your fucking Nvidia 4090. Here's the other problem. I know what I like, and I like it. So I own the game. I spent about six hours looking into what it would take to get good at the game.

It's a tremendous amount of time that you must have spent. It's going to take me 50 fucking hours at least to get good at this game. Because just learning the first 15 build order is going to take me a day to memorize it and have it down. And then after that... First 15 builds quick. Yeah, but I got to get them quick. I got to memorize them like it's the back of my hand.

And then I just feel like, why the fuck am I putting this on my mental hard drive? Why is this being programmed in here by repetition it's not about gaining anything as soon as you're ready to play it's always about winning and gaining that's the only reason i do this and whenever you're ready to play a next generation game with me i'll get in there deep with you okay that's why i wrote right here that's what i wrote right here well warhammer i'm totally down for Warhammer. But I know you'd enjoy it. Or Company of Heroes 3. Company of Heroes 3 is World War fucking 2.

See, that one is more tempting to me. You don't really have to manage an economy much. You just have to hold outposts. But it's still, I like that management more. I like the map-based control. And that part of Warhammer is really cool, where you can use the terrain to your advantage or disadvantage of your opponents.

It's fun. It's a great game. I love the setup of the Total War franchise. But there's just a different layer of economy added to it that I really enjoy that's a bunch of fun. And you know you would like it. You're afraid to play, because you know you would get so fucking into the build orders and you'd be playing all these different civs.

You're afraid to get into it. You know you'd love it. Age of Mythology is the exact same game, essentially, just different civs. What you're playing is an expansion pack. Or maybe what I was playing, or Age of Mythology, you could say, is an expansion to what you're doing. AOM is a lot simpler than AoE. There's a lot... The tech tree is a lot simpler than AoE. There's a lot...

The tech tree is a lot simpler, and there's only three sibs with three gods each in Age of Mythology, and there's 42 sibs in AoE. I remember more than that. It's weird. Well, I love Warhammer again, because every couple months, they charge you $15 for a whole new sib, Taylor.

By the time you're done, that game costs like $300. Oh, good. I'm not even kidding. I'm not even kidding. So I played a tremendous amount of Warhammer 2. It'll remind you of Magic the Gathering.

A little bit. It's another great game. When I first started, it was like a list of shit that I needed to buy to be able to play all the races. You get maybe eight to start with, and it's just buy, buy, buy, buy, buy.

And by the time you're done, a lot of it's free now because it's for the second one anyway, I guess, but it's a couple hundred dollars worth of DLC at least. Have you seen the train simulator DLC? It's just endless. You can scroll on that Steam page for like 10 minutes, and it's just $100 trains.

What is it like? A new route to download or stuff like that? Just a new train car, I guess. I haven't ran out of enough fun. There's enough fun games without the simulator game. What's that Russian game that just came out? Is it Hearts of Iron with the

sexy robo ladies that everybody's having a cow about? Because all the dudes are like, that's what a woman looks and and and the women are like no it's not that and and i wish they would reply you don't know what a woman is but it's the the rope the robots in this are just like titties and ass it's just this big hourglass with no face i mean they're robots but but still they're like these big sexy soviet robots with machine guns. Hearts of Iron was a... Yeah, not Hearts of Iron. It's...

Oh, what is it? It's Atomic Heart? Is it Atomic Heart? Yeah. I haven't looked into it all, but it looks like some sort of... Not cyberpunk exactly, but some sort of weird alternate future Soviet Russia or something.

A little bit of Bioshock vibes for me. Maybe. Yeah, I haven't looked into it at all, but I plan on playing it. The thing is, the Sons of the Forest came out today. So that's my next game. If either of you want to join me in Sons of the Forest, I think it's going to be a blast. It's a horror survival game.'s an it's a yeah yeah it's like i gotta push the pc to the

limit let's see what i can do yeah i'm excited about that so it's story driven um so the first game um basically you're playing crashes on this island well it turns out on that island there's some secret organization is doing genetic altering tests underground in a hidden base and above ground are like their failed experiments which are like these mutated cannibal people and so you have to contend and first thing that happens while you're disabled from the crash your son your like 12 year old son is snatched up by like the leader of like the the the people he's out for test subjects i guess and so you spin the game um trying to rescue your son now it's not it's uh completely um open world and you need like five items to complete the final mission to like go and get your son so you're

gonna need like a climbing axe well that's down in this hole over here you got to spelunk through a cave and eventually get it same thing with like the lighter the map the compass the oxygen tank the flippers weapons are very scarce there's a very cool crafting system um where you like actually do the shit like like and uh there's uh you can build cabins and all sorts of traps to defend yourself from the cannibals of the island the combat is really visceral and and and rough the spelunking is terrifying it's very frightening the forest because sounds like that yeah that's what i'm describing oh okay yeah okay yeah um so well you know the sequel's coming out the premise of the sequel is you're like a special forces squad being sent to an island to rescue somebody so So that sounds way better. Because in the first game, you were throwing spears.

And it was scary because you were so unarmed. I look forward to it again. Here's the best part, Taylor. One of your comrades, it turns out, had a whoopsie. And something happened to him. He got hit over the head. And now, for all intents and purposes, he's retarded.

He can't hear and he can't speak. But, he could take a piece of paper and go and type into it go get logs and show it to him and he's your slave. He'll just keep bringing

logs back. You have a retarded man-slave as part of this game. And it'll do whatever you tell it to do. Yeah, it's awesome. And it looks like you've got some sort of mutated pussy. There's this lady with, like, four legs and at least two vaginas, I'm hoping. I don't know how many buttholes. We'll see.

But she does this, like, seductive dance in one of the trailers. And she's doing,'s doing a ballet performance. And then before you know that she has multiple limbs, it's cool. And then all of a sudden, extra limbs flip out behind the other ones. Yeah, she's a monster. I mean, we're on an island, Taylor. Beggars, choosers, you know how it is. Yeah.

But the monster will kill you. No, no, no. She's down. Taylor will be killed. Oh. DTF. This is a pretty cool game. Yeah. But the monster will kill you. No, no, no. She's down. Kill or be killed. Oh. DTF. This is a pretty cool game. Yeah.

You just demand things of retarded men and fight or fuck aliens? Yeah, and we do it together. Love that. I like camaraderie. I don't know if we each get a slave or if we have to share one, but I'm happy to share my slave and I'll let you name him because I know you'll come up with a good name. Oh, that's great.

I'll come up with one. I'll come up with a just offensive enough we can swing it name like for our tarted man who fetches logs. If he can't do anything else but logs, then he's not very exciting. But if you can't do anything else but logs then he's not very exciting but if you know whatever you want him to if you can tell him like kill hey kill that ghoul and then he just

kill they'll be pretty useful i think he'll defend i think he'll like fight like like like but the the purpose he passes the butter oh my god yeah but i've been here's the here's the downside of all this it's a 30 game um but um it was supposed to release and i might be a little off in these states it was supposed to release last may i think and then they were like we'll get you in the fall and then they're like actually early access in february So that's what they've done. Actually, we saw what happened with the Darktide people. We're going to finish the game first. No, they're not going to finish the game.

They literally went early access, released the game. So it's going to be most of the game, I'm sure. That's obnoxious. I don't know. I see a bunch of people in our little... They don't make games like they used to, do they? No. Really, they peaked in 1997. Really, they peaked in 1997.

Really, they peaked in 1999. I mean, this isn't nostalgia or some old-timey shit. It's like they literally don't finish games now. They literally go early access because they keep getting away with it. And I don't mind when they're $30 and they promise you future content will be free. Tarkov, dude, I've got my money work.

Money's worth so many times over. I'm perfectly fine with the balance that I've struck with Tarkov monetarily. We've been talking about gaming, Josh, what are, what's your all time favorite game or games enjoy? I have a shitload of time in war Thunder. So that's why I was asking all the tank questions pretty much.

But yeah, it's just tanks jets that probably too much time and too much money into war thunder but that's my thing for sure what are you doing is it a war game on a simulator so you got combined battles you got tanks uh or you have just jets um i mean pretty much just tank simulator versus jet simulator. And it can be kind of broken sometimes. But my main thing that I'm wondering is, like, they don't go all the way up to modern tanks and jets. They stop at, like, kind of like at the Cold War now. But it just makes me wonder what's going to happen

as they continue to progress the USSR tree in that game. Because, I don't know, current events is kind of like where they're at and what they're using right now anyway. I saw a graveyard today over there for the Wagnerites. I think the Wagner guys. It goes on and on. I'll send it to you on WhatsApp. I don't know if we can show it, but you can look at it at the very guys. It goes on and on. I'll send it to you.

On WhatsApp. I don't know if we can show it, but you can look at it at the very least. It's shocking. That's Russian. Yeah, the Russian private military. It's like they're black guys. Yeah, it's a little bit different than that. It's more of a state-sponsored terror cell, right?

It's kind of like Blackwater. No, not at all. They recruit from like prison and stuff there for wagner oh i i saw one of the the speeches that they give to at the prison it was good and honest and i liked it this dude this dude all right so imagine this dark prison yard full of prisoners standing i'm there no one the there's snow on the ground it's nighttime and this guy's up on a platform and he's yelling at him he's like we're looking for men who've had it hard and are going to continue having it hard we're looking if you've assaulted if you assaulted someone if you killed someone that's good we're not looking for people who are getting out soon if you've got 10 15 years we want you if um if you've. If you've got 10, 15 years, we want you.

If you've done many, if this is not your first time in, if you're a second time, third time, multiple offender, we want you. Don't misunderstand. Where you're going, it is hard. We need you for the meat grinder. He's telling them. He's like, are they beating you here? Have you been beaten by the cops, beaten by the guards?

Do you want to get out of here? Do you want to get out of here? Do you need to get out of here? He says, I myself was serving the 10-year sentence. And I'm sure many of you have many skills like I had. Many of you have skills that even I don't have. Beaten by guards? The front line might be right for you. Unless it's someone walking through a park. I'm doing my part.

And then if you look on your... If you look what I sent you, it's literally like a panning shot of an extensive graveyard of these guys dead. It's wild. Yeah. Have you been following it every day still, Kyle? Yeah, yeah. I can't not. I watch

a ton of footage of tank ambushes and lots of grenade stuff. and um i saw uh something that showed the accuracy of russian versus ukrainian artillery it was fascinating so you you have opposing trenches right and from from elevation you can look down and see the ukrainian trench and the artillery fire is this very it covers a huge area like it's it's in the general area many of the shots are ineffective many of them it looks like it looks like you randomly sprinkled a big area and that the trench happens to be in meanwhile on the russian side it's these dark circles that

just line their trench and most of the misses are just a few dozen yards away on either side it's this concentrated artillery fire mortars whatever makes an explosion when it hits the ground because by and just to be clear there's thousands and thousands of strikes in this field it's not like a few holes it looks like a i mean it is a war zone it looks like some terminator 2 post-apocalyptic shit the trees are all shot down it's a smoking ruinous like no man's land where everything is upturned and upheaved from explosion and fire i want to quiet on the western front i think it's so it's like battlefield one you play that that's what it looks like it's actually happening i have watched a lot of footage of like you know whatever there's a war in syria there

was a war here there was a war there and they show you the destruction but really they cover it kind of like they do floods like they they try not to have all the standing healthy buildings in the shot and and here's a building that's been wrecked here if you watch a tornado the truth is that tornado has taken out a line of homes and most of the town is fine but they photograph it in such a way or video it in such a way it looks like that tornado wrecked everything because everything you're seeing is wrecked you might make the assumption that everything you're not seeing is also wrecked cool when you look at these towns in ukraine you know bakmut or whatever they're after now. And they are leveled.

Every building is ruined. All of them. I can't fathom how many missiles or how many artillery shots have been fired to level an entire town. It is. There isn't a useful building in the whole fucking place. And I'm like, good God,

everyone in there is just too depressing to follow you start awesome have you seen the have you seen the pov i mean millions of people are never gonna be able to return to their home of the tank in bakhmut it's it's on the russian side but it's the pov of a russian tank in bakhmut and they move forward a little bit between the apartment buildings and you know all the trees are just kind of toasted black kind of falling over roots up up upheaved and stuff and they go for a little bit and they take some shots and they back up a little bit to reload or do whatever around the corner i don't know if you've seen that kyle but it was

just it didn't seem real i don't watch tank that fired at a building maybe twice and then ran out of there as the artillery got more accurate i saw that maybe it's not the same one in any case wrecked and that i don't kyle do you want to jump in or do you want to keep going yeah i don't watch any of the russian stuff but um the the best video that i've seen from the entire war is is this one right here it's uh it's fairly recent um and it's uh it's a guy defending his uh his uh his trench he starts off with a fucking h-e-r-p-g at a at a position it's hard to see but then he switches over to like maybe some kind of ak545 aka and whacks like three guys like in pretty quick succession kills them you can see him you can and

the first one he kills i've seen it slowing down where you can see like his suppressor in the bottom left of the shot and he goes like a three round burst and you see like the guys you see the guy die like like real close and then he like he's like throwing grenades shooting under barrel grenade launchers shooting an rpk loading an rpk and i'm like where are his buddies the only guy that's with him is in a hole in the ground literally in a little bunker and he's just handing him ammo and explosives oh here you go buddy here's some more here's some and he's just like blah blah blah grenade blah blah missile or whatever he's he's like a kid playing a video game out there. It's fun to watch. Yeah. I just, I really don't like

videos of people dying anymore. Oh, well, what if they're bad people? Come on, in Lord of the Rings, you know, when we... Oh, well, in Lord of the Rings, those are orcs. They have fangs and they're bad. That's what they call the Russians. Yeah, they call Russians orcs. They call Russians orcs.

Well, but they're people. They're not spawned from the ground. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Watching people die is sad. Have you ever seen a Russian be born? That is true.

I haven't. I haven't seen, you know, now that I'm thinking of it, I haven't seen anyone be born. I've seen a cow born. I helped cow birth then that's it not even on it's probably on youtube i'm pretty sure you can watch birthing videos on cgi i have not gotten around to that corner you know maybe maybe someday but no i haven't i bet terrible to masturbate have you ever uh i think there used to be like uh i heard rumors or maybe red there are mammogram videos with like indian guys horny as shit on in the comments on youtube that's very funny that is funny where they'll be like like feeling their breast and they'll be like

you are so incredibly sexy and it's like it's like she's just checking for lungs. No, of course not. I hope you'll find something. Yes. Because my cousin is an oncologist. He could help you maybe if you find something. That's how he gets things. That's his bag. Can you imagine?

Can I check your dates for two miles? And it wouldn't be good. No, the Hindu Stanis, the Indians. I have a Ask Me Anything or AMA, yeah. Oh, yeah, we need to do this anyway. That's your $10 patron token. That's one of your many, many benefits. Are you ready?

I hope they did a good job with this question because the reason we don't read a lot of them is because sometimes it just feels like a third grader wrote it, and I'm trying not to embarrass people, and it's like, man, do I read it the way he spelled that word? Do I really call him out? Anyway, go ahead, Woody, please. I bet you got a good one.

Here's the deal, boys. In parentheses, not trying to buy into the church of Kyle. My girlfriend of almost three years, both early 20s, has gained 20 pounds since we've started dating, while I've gained mostly muscle. She is going to college and working part-time while I already have my degree and work full-time to support us both. I find time consistently to go to the gym five to six times a week, hashtag gorilla mode inspiration. And while she has a short stint for about two months, while she had a short stint for about two months,

she fell off the wagon. What advice, what advice do the hosts have for encouraging your partner to take better care of themselves? So she works part-time, can't get to the gym. He works full-time, can get to the hosts have for encouraging your partner to take better care of themselves so she works part-time can't get to the gym he works full-time can get to the gym she's gained 20 pounds um it depends on a few things um it who's whose name's on the lease seems like yeah like i i think you want to be careful about about pushing things too far

because there could be a red line um but but i don't think it's going to be as dramatic as you think because unless you're dating a person who's mentally unstable which hey i'm a big fan of that myself but but i'm gonna assume that you're not um then i think that you could i think i think the first step is always that sort of friendly nudge I know Woody and his wife do this thing where they look at each other when they're a little chubby and they go mmm they fat shame each other

now they haven't needed to fat shame each other I think in a couple years that's based in red pilled to go yeah usually bloggers are like oh is that a pie I love that you do that that's hilarious oh enjoy you can do that to her

that's my advice use the woody maneuver every time you see her eating here's what you need to do learn how to play the tuba and walk behind her when she walks. If you have a prescription for Adderall, if you could just sprinkle in five milligrams a day into one of her

puddings. She's having multiple puddings. You know she's finishing off that. You get those snack packs and they come in like like four like a four square you know you're gonna finish that four square mashed potatoes you mean that four you mean that four section is not the snack no you're supposed to snap those off so that would be my advice honestly like like like don't don't drug her or or immediately like remove her from your life i suppose but but um i would say it's like a a nudge at first where

you're just kind of like hey i'd like for you i'd really like to work out together because some you always make it your problem this is this is how men operate by the way um you make it your fault your weakness your problem that you need them to help you with because anything else won't work you can't show up and say because anything else won't work. You can't show up and say, hey, you clearly don't have a lot of willpower, stick-to-itiveness. These are my strong suits. I'm going to help you apply them so you don't look so bad anymore. And I like you more because I like what's inside, but lately not so much what's outside. That's what you want to say, but you can't say that shit. What you say is, what you say is,

what you say is, I got a problem. I hate working out alone and I don't think I'm going to be able to stay motivated. I want you in there with me. I think it'd be a good bonding thing for us. I actually came up with a workout program where we can do stuff together. So we're going to do some medicine ball stuff. That's see, see, you can't let her wander over there and get on the step master or whatever, because they'll fuck around and they'll end up on their phone. What you do is you toss her a medicine ball and she tosses it back. You wiggle a rope and she wiggles the other side. We do group activities now.

We're going to mix in 20 minutes of calisthenics every other day now, and you'll solve your problem in a couple of weeks. And here's the thing. Her sex drive will go up, and it'll be good. You'll be all sweaty afterwards, more anyway yeah good times do that dress up as a mugger and kyle i think kyle gave the best i don't think i can add anything to that like i don't know i i think i like kyle's plan a lot i think it's great if it doesn't work though you're in your early 20s and you can't keep in shape talking to the girl really you're pre-fat bitch actually you're fat fat and you're pre-fatter if you're packing on the pounds at like 22 23 i don't like your future you think you think what do you think

this fucking land mammal is gonna look like at 40 right She's struggling at 23. 23 is easy mode. It's easy mode. You can fucking have no diet and just live a regular fucking gluttonous life at 23 years old. If you want to be a fatty fat fuck that puts on 20 pounds at 23 years old, you are telling me

that you're going to put on 60 pounds by 26 years old. Oh, taking strays. No, you're so right. You're so right. If you're having troubles at 23 with your weight, it's like this is a habit thing. A habit's got to change because this isn't going to get easier as you go on. If you have a cookie problem at 22, it's what he's absolutely right the real question is is this

girlfriend of yours that's why i mentioned the least one to start with right we're gonna how what's your living situation if you're paying all the bills sir like are you gonna be destitute if you say the wrong shit are you on the second floor i hope That was in the question to some extent. He says that he said he was supporting. I would probably ask what her favorite exercise is and then I would maybe offer to join in that if she was open to it.

Forklift. He says I work full time and support us both. Forklift? His favorite exercise? Yeah. Operator? is both forklift is her favorite exercise lift yeah thank you for the mime i'm on the industrial machine what kind of exercise is that you gotta keep powering through yeah no i'm worried about her future you know what lots of people are hot future. Lots of people are hot at 21. Lots of people are hot at 21. And it sounds like maybe she was.

Now she's 23 and she's fallen off the hot wagon already. Dude, she has. Have you. Wait, do you put a baby into this fucking bovine? Like she's going to be an entirely different person. I graduated from Bovine University. Dude, if you if you want to get the most like the best takes out of woody bring up fat people or people gaining weight because he has no patience for it and i what is one of my favorite things about you fat people come up

it's like go fuck yourself lose weight lose weight fatty like so he's always he's always hated them but like now that he's like super fit he's on his high horse he's up there on his high horse and he sees anybody with like because what it is is he's had to suffer for what he has and so when he sees someone who hasn't he he sees he knows that they are lacking that, is he's had to suffer for what he has. And so when he sees someone who hasn't, he knows that they are lacking. He's like, you didn't do what I, you can't do what I do. You couldn't even dream of doing what I do on a daily basis. And I get more done. He's weighing and measuring these people at a glance.

You see, Taylor? And deciding like, worthless, yes, worthy. and deciding like worthless work yes worthy worthless it's like that scene from sabotage where arnold's like you 48 body fat fatty have you seen that yeah it's so funny like because that's like what arnold falls back to he's like oh he's fat you know it's just i don't know if you can find the scene it's pretty hilarious you moron i mean if you're on you can call people that all you want if she gained 20 pounds and she was 37 you know and like whatever but like dude i don't know i don't like it i don't know maybe maybe she's six five i feel like that would have been a question you gotta keep your house fucking tight

jackie put on her wedding dress from 30 years ago this week. That is a good way to... Did you bring it up where you're like, Jackie, bi-monthly test! Put it on! I just had lunch. No excuses!

I'm timing you with my fancy watch. No excuses. The barometric pressure is just like last time tell me the barometric pressure is making you bloated i know and we're in the gym together like exactly um i just think like like what he makes good point i i guess i forgot how old this guy was i'm just thinking generally speaking like maybe like you're considering marrying this person. Go with what I said. If this is someone you've been dating for, I don't know how,

for how long, for a few months. And you just like improved your own, like letter grade, if you will. Like, like sounds like you've been working out and getting in better shape. Yeah.

You want to get on out of that. But, but find a nice excuse. You know, don't, don't have her. I'm curious about the, I,

I picked up a little bit of like she's not matching me on a lot of fronts he says he's finished school and he's supporting them both working full-time and hitting the gym she works part-time and she's still in school and maybe i misinterpreted i felt like there was a little like now she's in her fifth year while I carry the water for both of us, making it all happen. I don't know if that's true. Maybe I'm stretching it. I appreciate the details. No, that's good.

No, I would say if she's someone you want to hang on to, my ticket is the way to improve her. But always know that Woody'sody's route is is absolutely practical and pragmatic and you can just pull the ripcord on this and upgrade like it here's the deal do you want a hot girlfriend in two months three months four months or three or four days if he upgraded his position like i don't know he might be a really good catch he's in the gym all the time he's gainfully employed he's finished school like sounds like a little resent is in that message to me yeah that's what i was trying to say yeah well he's already a little a little

annoyed at how much more he's pouring into it not only physically there's a sexual market value we all have a sexual market value. We all have a sexual market value, and he's realizing there's a gap between him and her that's growing. I want clearance. It's the effort. He's pointing out that I do more than her, and I'm able to get this done. She's clearly not prioritizing it.

Yeah. And if she's not independently prioritizing that, she's not going to continue to after you stop your little song and dance of this we have to do all this together like it's unlikely so if you're having to like if this is your goal it might be easier you know it sounds like this guy frankly is quite a bit out of her league if we're being real it seems like by the way he's talking about this, that he's out of her league.

I mean, he's a fan of us, so he's a goddamn winner. We know that for sure. An absolute winner. Great sense of humor. You know what I'd like? Don't go too wild. He might not be Patreon. No, he is.

He asked the question. Oh, he is the Patreon, man. What am I thinking? This guy's a stud. We need $40 more from this successful man and we can upgrade him to the in-person consultation. This is going to be happening in just a few short days.

It is. That's what you want to do. What comes along with that, Woody will break up with your pig for you. He will bring his bluest shirt. what comes along with that, Woody will break up with your pig for you. He will bring his bluest shirt. He'll take blue fucking underpain under his eyes.

I will send that heifer on her way. I'll get through guys with ATVs because we do this modern to just corral her to some other pasture and we'll get her set. Next time you make her dinner, make yourself spaghetti and put apple cores and compost in get her set. Next time you make her dinner, make yourself spaghetti and put apple cores

and compost in front of her and be like, oh, I'm sorry. I thought that we were both eating what we liked. You, a pig, and me, an adult. Do that. I think that's actually a good idea, isn't it? And then you go

man maybe just pick one of these so that nobody dies no it's a it's like a gathering combo i'll say this like like like maybe y'all don't know maybe y'all haven't dealt with enough uh women um that are mentally ill. All this like breaking up and being mean shit is a bad idea. You always take the L right off the bat. Oh, man, I didn't live up to your expectations. Shit, I'm going to have to better myself. Thank you for, hell, this breakup is going to be a growing moment for me.

That's how you walk out the door. You don't say anything mean. Women are scary. Do it the way way i said women are fucking scary you don't they'll ruin your gas tank my cousin's truck for the longest time was just beaten to shit all the time because women would come back with one more camp one bitch came back with a hammer and just went down the side of his truck just knocking fucking dents in the side of it. He got his gas tank sugared so many times. I think the

fuel filter was just getting ruined every time. It didn't get into the engine, but that's an expensive thing in its own right. Just a fuel filter is like $175, that whole mechanism and everything, but then there's a whole process. He had to get a locking fuel cap. Don't be making more money. This guy, he's great.

By the way, you want an unethical... Multiple women? Does he just have lots of girlfriends? Yeah. Yeah. Scott would just have sex with these women

and promise them the moon. The next day, have a different girl in there and the next day having as many women as he could possibly muster. I don't know what he was telling them. I don't know what he was telling them or whatever, but I guess... No, my new teeth are in the mail. No, he's not.

That's not his cousin. Oh, speaking of Jeremy's cousin. Although it's funny to say Jeremy's cousin because he hates him. He is my cousin, yeah. Oh, yeah. say jeremy's cousin because he is my cousin yeah oh yeah um so um he's not um yeah jeremy um so as you know my i think he is like fourth or fifth cousins like down here that's not even related right so but but you could marry it's this guy that like worked for me for years josh and he um he had these very rotten teeth like meth he had like meth mouth okay not from meth though i know that for a fact just from not taking care of them and

plenty of like sodas and shit or whatever anyway rotten disgusting hard to look at uh my cousin scott is a normal human being with who brushes his teeth and is a handsome fellow anyway the two of them are hanging out yeah just differentiating the two like um but uh i guess they were somewhere i think in a walmart parking lot so classy but jeremy like pairs off with this girl and scott looks and they're like making out like jeremy and this girl are making out over there and i guess jeremy like leaves or goes away from the situation the the crowd and scott goes over to her he's like how can you do that he's like what how can you kiss him what are you talking about he's all right looking i'm talking about his teeth how can you put your tongue in his mouth and and kiss him you've seen him right She'd only seen him in the darkness of the parking lot.

He goes, when he comes back over, look in his fucking mouth. What are you doing? Damn, Scott is a hater. I don't like that. I don't like that. He just didn't want her to get infected. He's a lifeguard, really.

Dude, they're so bad look you you'd want to look out for somebody too like like it would be like like hey you know that you know he's a dog man right what do you mean he's half dog didn't you look he's got a tail god damn it you've been making out with a dog man like you gotta let people know he names those teeth were problematic like i don't know how they i i don't think I've ever seen teeth worse than that on a healthy person. People would ask me about it.

Some of them were these... You know what they look like? Maybe you've seen them in RTS games. Maybe Polynesian swords that are pieces of sharp volcanic glass. The obsidian. Yeah yeah like there's a like that's what his teeth were they were like separated and like round they looked serrated

they looked like they could put a real like how does that happen from say like gollum like gollum remember when he bites into that fish like i it was i bet they weren't the right shape they weren't the right color and they certainly weren't pointing in the right direction. He really had it all. That was just from neglect. Just from deciding, brushing teeth, not for me. I know that he...

So he dipped, he smoked, and lots of Red Bull and Mountain Dew and stuff like that. Don't you like brushing your teeth in the morning and at night to feel cleaner in your mouth? I don't throw a party about it or anything, but I get in there and get it done.

If you went five... No, but I'm saying, Kyle, think about it. If you went five days eating and drinking and smoking weed and without brushing your teeth, way before that five-day mark, you would be going, fuck, I want to brush like i want to clean my teeth way yeah i've known i've known some people who didn't brush um obviously uh i don't

know what jeremy did since then he's gotten dentures so he has a much better aesthetic but i worked with a guy uh selling cars and he was a i would say 60 year old black man late 50s more likely um big ed big Ed was like tall as shit. Six, five, six, six or something. Former basketball player. And he never brushed his teeth and they were like super duper gross. And I asked him about it one time. I was like, Ed, what's going on with the teeth, boss?

And he was like, I don't brush. I take peroxide and I dilute it. He told me the ratio that he diluted it to. I rinsed twice a day. That's it. I was like, cool. It's not working. I didn't press them any further.

They looked gross. I feel like you could see pus around them. Sounds like you could just be in pain during the day. How do you function like this? Teeth problems are very painful. You don't want that. I know with Jeremy, it was just always super gross. I'm glad he got those fucking dentures.

I give Jeremy a hard time. I guess he deserves a hard time. I'm pretty sure he stole a bunch of shit from me. That's fine. The government was going to eventually steal it anyway. It's okay. It wasn't toothpaste. My floss is missing. All right. It's not Jeremy. Stole the mouthwash.

Jeremy's over there with his stink mouth. Yeah, I remember rotten fucking teeth somebody pulled me aside once like like we were shooting in uh in tennessee and the guy that like owned the property hey another guy what's going on is that meth is that methamphetamine and i i i was like no i don't fuck with anybody that does any methamphetamine. I wanted him to know that because we're like, they're doing a bunch of money transaction trading hands. And like, I'm looking for a future deal with this man.

I'm like, nah, we don't fuck with no meth. He's just a dirty redneck. And he's like, oh, okay, good, good. I can deal with that. Dirty rednecks I like. I like dirty rednecks too. I know a lot of them. But it always just...

I mean, you can see them in those videos that we shot. They look pretty rough. I love that he choked out wings. That's one of my favorite things that ever transpired. I love that. Because Wings was on here talking shit, our former co-host. He's like 400 pounds. And we go back and forth about,

I could beat up a bear and I could do this and that i use i i usually try to be honest about those and like not try to say something stupid like i i can't beat up a bear he'll kill me i i think i'd beat up a dog that's about as big as it gets yeah wing said something like he was so big and like wide that you couldn't rear naked choke him he's like uh he's like nah you could i'm just so big and so round and everything i just like flex and like roll my shoulders and you just like pop off of me or whatever and like finally i got him to my house and and jeremy and i had been taking um uh jujitsu for two and a half months or something like that so he get he was getting his practice on his rear naked chokes and we did it

on YouTube. We made a YouTube video of him putting a choke on wings and then wings trying to defend it. It was fun. It was fun. Fun times. You guys want to call it a show? Time to wrap. I think so, Josh. We enjoyed you so much.

I'm glad to hear that your leachy awful family hasn't stuck their fangs back into your life at all and that you found a wonderful new family in your in-laws, to-be in-laws, hopefully, or whatever they may be. So very happy for you. Thank you. Thank you. And might I just say, I know that I've been quiet. It's just been a really long time since I've done a podcast like this. So I hope that I haven't made it too awkward or anything,

but it's been a pleasure listening to Kyle's stories. Not at all. Yeah, of course. All right. Check out Josh's stuff. Link in the description, PKA 636.