Painkiller Already - PKA 648 W/ F1nn5er: Wings Dominates Boogie, Mr Beast Fear Factor, F1nn Passes Johnny Sins

Episode Date: May 20, 2023

pka 648 with our guest finster taylor this episode of pka brought to you by lock and load real dbg.com and again freeze pipe a bunch of wonderful sponsors finn thank you so much for joining you look lovely this evening i know oh sorry thank you i thought that means a lot i know wow but you've been tearing up only fansans. How does that feel? Yeah, that's been fun. I reckon when it first started, so I launched in like May, sorry, March 1st. And it's arguable because OnlyFans don't post like stats like YouTube do. Like if you want to find out who the number one YouTuber is,

you can easily. But on OnlyFans, everything's so hush-hush and private. But like, for example, I recently passed johnny sins in likes on only fans so i'm technically more popular i'm a more popular sex worker than johnny sins nice nice it's kind of big the big deal is a man yeah it's like a really big deal do they tell you your percentage it seems like girls are always advertising they're the top one percent or something yeah that one oh man and um so they it's really it was really delayed for me but before i launched like the day before it was uh i think 0.34 and then wow that was the evening before and then the first

day it was uh 0.01 which is as low as it goes very nice I saw a post on there I am kept well abreast of your OnlyFans you pay for it? no I can't stop the links from coming to me what the fuck man that's stealing

you wouldn't download the car put my eyes out every time they send me Finnn's bulge you could just ask by the way like they never send me like your ass i don't even know what that looks like i'm good unless you start right now because that'll get some clicks you want to get x-rated right now we'll just blur it out i mean we don't want to get struck but it'd be fun i'll send it you on discord that'd be such a good reaction clip well i mean it can't be as as upsetting as what i've been getting sent which is a lot of bulge and then i guess

i guess at one point you did a i'll call it a spread because that's funny a spread where uh you were like i can be masculine or i can be thin. Get on your knees. That's what it says or something like that. And it's like you with a blazer on, but just barely hiding your nipples for whatever reason and in panties or something like that. I vaguely remember. I don't have artwork of it.

You got a lot. That's like a 30 photo. You got a lot of those. You scroll right to the end. I'm impressed, my every week a new update whenever you do something more scandalous and i got one though which was just like a poll um because my what i had been asking was how well is he doing how well like are we talking like a house a month or like three houses a month and uh they sent me a poll that you had asked and it had five or six thousand upvotes and it's like oh well it's already a house a month and we're early on

so i we're definitely heading to two houses a month soon i can update you on that poll by the way so that one's public so i don't really mind talking about it oh shit so anybody could vote on that so that's not a good indicator of your your sub count No, that's a very good indicator myself camp, but it's updated like there's time has passed and more people have voted Everyone can only vote once you got to pay $20 to be able to vote and there's I think it's it It's sitting right now at about 14,000 votes on that poll and that's what everyone seems to be aware of how many every single person Who voted paid $20? Yeah? Dude, that's awesome. You're asked and what's your cut of that 20? to be aware of how many questions. Every single person who voted paid $20. Yeah. Dude, that's awesome.

What was the question you asked? And what's your cut of that $20? 80%. Yeah. What was the question you asked? Yes. Hmm? Just a random poll. The content of the poll is immaterial.

It's how many people voted on it is indicative of what the subscriber count is. Because it's not like YouTube where there's a big sub count at the top. so we're trying to use that as a means of finding out obviously he's getting checks so sometimes i really want to say how much money was it pay-per-view right like like you could have a free only fans then be like for 3.99 you can see this picture for some reason i thought for 20 bucks you can participate in this poll you can't but 20 bucks to him yeah so it's you know i get 20 they get a vote and that's how people know a lot of people don't

vote but did people pay separately to be able to vote no those are his subscribers it's like anyone who's already sub can vote only fans is essentially if you've ever been on there it's a ripoff of twitter it's made exactly to mimic Twitter, but way buggier. It's almost like imagine if you can't see someone's Twitter feed unless you pay them $20 and then you have access to everything they do. So it's just a Twitter feed that you have to like go to individual silos and like buy every one. That's true, but I'm compelled to say not everyone does it that way. Sometimes they're like my Twitter feed is free but certain posts cost money that way it's easy to build a following but they it's almost pay-per-view like for each post you can do that on only fans as well you um you'll be like that's what i was

saying if you're one of these girls in the early days and you're like here's my nipple but here's me sucking my nipple and calling you daddy for five minutes. It'll cost you $35 to unlock that video Do you do stuff like that? That's the build-off. That's sort of what that's what I've got Who does that peach just as I am rent? I think does that on one of her accounts Bell does Bell or fiend does something similar where she gets the best of both worlds because she did a sex tape right like about a year ago and she's just been carrying on doing them so what she did was her only fans cost like 35 a month it's a it's

a premium but then she'll also say like guess what i did recently i fucked mia khalifa 50 bucks in dms or however much it is yeah she did that like a week ago so she has like specials was it like it's time to juice the numbers yeah they've yeah oh wow because i i did see her with i don't know all the like titty girls on the internet but i saw i do keep up with belle delphine uh every now and then like i'll see what what new depravity she has sunk to. No judgment. She's making like eight houses a month or something like that. Good for her. But yeah, she was fucking some other chick, or at least naked with some other chick,

masturbating last time I peeked in there. But it wasn't Mia Khalifa, because I would recognize her. I mean, how could you not? She's like... Oh, Mia Malkova. Oh, I'm stupid. Sorry, Mia Malkova.

Oh, that's who it was then. I saw that. Yeah, I've seen it. My bad. Thanks, Zach. Yeah, there's like... Oh, I'm stupid. Sorry, me and Malkova. Oh, that's who it was then. I saw that. Yeah, I've seen it. Yeah, my bad. Thanks, Zach. Yeah, there's like... Here comes the score. Yeah, I saw that on Twitter, and it...

Oh, that's... No! I'm sure Finn had something real well thought out to say there, but I'll say this. Belle Dauphine. I know they caught her using that app that makes your face look younger, like in kind of a childish sort of way, because she left the watermark on one of her pictures she uploaded.

And people were like, can you believe it? And it's like, dude, she's wearing a first graders uniform and carrying a Velcro lunchbox. You're surprised she's using an app to make her. What are you talking about? Yeah, she's got crayons. She's coloring she's a fortune 500 company you know it's funny you said that because when i heard uh mia khalifa

like hasn't she been a big deal for like 10 years now she must be that young did did one weekend of pornography filming maybe one set like one day of filming and that um was uploaded i don't know how many videos it is maybe eight videos or clips or whatever but that is how she became famous on the internet i don't think she got paid very much for that but she's been able to profit from she's so recognizable and iconic with the glasses and i don't know what her race is but she i think she's middle eastern um kalifa yeah i'm looking she's 30 that's actually younger than i thought yeah question do you like girls in glasses kyle yeah and i think uh i think i think if you're trying to fucking my identity is not a costume

yeah my disability my disability is not some joke yeah that's good i was just saying last week i hope my eyesight goes soon because i want to wear glasses i like both these guys have nice nice frames yeah yeah you're just too much like yeah you're coming back in fine now finn so like oh yeah are you high enough up in like the rankings that like you know the people above you you're like oh yeah i'm familiar with those 15 people like like you stormed that far up it's different how you'd think it'd be like i i thought it would be like that where like you know you get to a certain point and then you sort of know everyone because there's but there's so many different varieties of people that do like go at only fans and shit like uh

i don't know there's that one girl that's just a dog she's just that's her whole thing like she pretends to be a dog for that you know there's you know like the big names like you'll know amaranth or beldorphine or something like that and you know they're massive or me and malcova all these people but like there's some variety the number one. The number one dude on OnlyFans is like Amaranth, but like fucking jacked. Cool. He's got like a million followers on there. And I have never met a single person that knows he exists. There was a moment on stream where I realized exactly what my chat was into.

Because I said, have you heard of this fucking dude? He's like jacked, this big manly dude on OnlyFans. You guys would be into that. You're all, you know, a little fr and then no one still no one knew him so that really placed where my audit what my audience yeah they're like a big jacked guy what am i i'm not gay like i want to look at the girly guy's bulge i want to look at that guy's dick i'm absolutely stuck on this i can barely name a youtuber that didn't have like great financial success that started that didn't buy real estate for a little while before they back

out and realize they don't like it have you bought your real estate yet have you made that financial mistake you're gonna get into commercial real estate commercial fuck i don't know i'm just saying something you're renting places out you're gonna buy a gas station like quibble cup oh my god oh i don't know how he did that i don't even know the process there's like um everyone seems to be doing it and it's very hush hush because no one wants to be known as a landlord you know that's a bad label to have but i'm moving from here i've been working on a house for a while i'm renovating it currently and it's actually moving along finally. So when I move from there, I get to make the choice of either sell this place,

depending on how well I'm doing in like five, six months, or rent it if I'm doing good enough to just maintain having two houses so I can be like scumbag landlord. It'd be great. You'll be a great landlord. Landlords are not inherently bad. I will be. I've thought a lot about this landlord thing.

I will be. When's the last time you had a landlord, Woody? 1998 or something like that. That's going to shift your thoughts on this, I think. I've had issues with mine. It's this big corporation corporation and that's worse than a person i'd sue a person i'd sue a man verse but i'm listening if there was some guy across town who was doing this shit to me and ignoring my requests i'd sue him we'd be in small claims

court then we'd be in civil court like like i'd fuck him up i'd make his life annoying but it's this big corporation so when you're like hey uh the water leak in my yard i still have water but just so you know i won't be paying for any of the water that leaks out of this house and the yard is going to be ruined they allow that to happen for almost eight months there was a crater in my yard a koi pond essentially that looked like a bomb had fallen there and filled up with water for eight months it didn't smell thank god but it was uh just an eyesore they didn't care because that much water leaking wasn't a big deal to them because they're a giant corporation and the the process of you know getting your claims uh escalated there's no one who actually cares it's all hourly paid employees it's a nightmare nightmare. And then when my, when my fucking AC went out a few years ago, again, huge nightmare. I was like,

it's 80 degrees in the house and they're like, 88 is an emergency. And I was like, Oh, you know what? Take it back. I hung up on that guy and called back and told him it was 88. And it made after a picture. I had the blow dryer ready. I have two experiences. One, I rented this in an apartment complex. It was a big company like yours. I don't even know how many apartment, super big. And behind the washing machine for clothes, it started to leak. The hose went bad or something. And my apartment didn't have a ton of damage, but the apartment under mine, tremendous. The light fixtures were like buckets just holding water. The floors were ruined. The carpets needed to be replaced.

Their personal belongings were damaged. It was just a stream of water that caused all this trouble while neither of us were home. So I returned to a slightly wet laundry area and he returned to a ruined apartment. Cool. The people that needed to fix it weren't mad at me. They're hourly employees. They just do this every day. There was nothing personal about it.

There were no problems. From my perspective, they replaced the hose. They toweled up the thing and that was it. It ended. I didn't have any problems. They didn't try to get my security deposit back or any of that nonsense. They're a giant company who didn't care. On the other hand, I rented a house from a dude. That dude lost his job. The house had a hole in the roof, a hole in the roof such that you

could stick your arm to your shoulder outside that hole in the roof. You could see outside through the hole in the roof and the water would come through this hole. It would drip down the walls and it would soak Jackie and I's pillows like they were sponges. And we wake up in the morning with these pillows that weighed like 27 pounds. And it was awful. And there was something wrong with the water. And it was well water. And there was a pump. And the pump pumped so slowly.

Like to fill the washer tub for clothing, seven hours. Like it was outrageously slow. When I showered, I'd make a cup with my hand and fill it from the shower head, then splash it on my hair. It's the well. They've got a bad well. This guy is giving me all of his sob story. I'm like, hey, I got these problems that need to be fixed. And he's like, I got problems too.

I lost my job. He could have knocked me over with a feather when I learned I lost my job. So we won't be doing any repairs to the rental place, but I need you to float my family and continue to pay your rent on time. His insurance should be handling this.

We're making some assumptions about the idea that him being insured, he just didn't have money to cover any of the repairs because he was just a dude who didn't have the cash to actually be a landlord and i got it was a terrible experience for us because of it i i can't imagine that sounds super shitty uh it the real problem is you need somebody you can go get and make do what's right and and it's hard to get that done in either scenario i suppose uh at times but i i still think the real thing but when i see people on reddit hating landlords it's almost like they're like

they don't like the system they don't like the way the scales have ended up for whatever reason they're like can you believe it they just sit there and take my money i'm the one working i support a landlord that's what i'm doing it's like no i mean i you know it's real frustrating to see taylor gets a wild hair and says you know what i need a third job i'm really not busy enough and and he decides to save up his cash for this big down payment and find the right place and then you know fix it up for the before the tenants come in and i probably do some level of repairs between every tenant then he's done all the stuff that the renters didn't have to do they were able to just waltz into the house that taylor saved up for that taylor makes payments for to do it like these landlords aren't evil

that's just the way it works if you don't want to be a renter, do what Taylor did. Yeah. I mean, like you're right that it's just like, when I see the, the like anti-work style people doing it, it's like, Oh,

this is a child who doesn't know how the world works. Like they heard someone else say landlords are bad. And now they're parroting that. Like there's a chasm of difference between like the list of like the 20 worst landlords in New York city where like, they're like, I haven't had water in months where like they're like i haven't had water in months and they're like fuck you like i'll send you to jail like there's a difference

between that and like a property man like i have a buddy who's like a property manager he's one of those guys who was like i'm gonna buy real estate in like addition to my job and within one year he was like oh yeah i had to quit my job like and learn how to be a handyman because I spend all day doing handyman stuff at all these properties. Like I thought it was going to be a little passive income, but it turns out it's not. If you're a billionaire, it's passive income because you have a thousand layers of middle management between you and the labor. If you're a dude who's a property manager who has a couple properties, you're working on that shit all the time. You don't have the capital to be like oh there was another boiler issue cost is no issue send another send someone else out there and spend a million like no you're going to be in there trying to figure it out like doing what you have a dozen if you have a dozen um three bedroom homes

that's a lot of toilets that's a lot of bulbs. That's so many furnaces and air conditioners and doorknobs and locks and latches and ovens and microwaves. I know slightly what that's like. You know, dad's farm, those poultry houses. There's thousands of light bulbs. There's thousands of gears and knobs because each chicken gets one, right? So there's thousands of everything in duplicate. And the biggest part of his job has always been maintenance man. Just walking around.

Oh, look at that. If I don't tighten that, everything will burn down. Good thing I was here. Every day is that. Every day is catching something that was three days away from disaster. Have you thought of, like, love for landlord subreddit? No, I've never heard of it. Is it a joke?

I'm actually the head mod. It's a whole subreddit. They've got their own little terminology in there. The landlords are known as land chads. They make memes about me when I increase the rent on a single mother of four. I didn't know this was my position. When you're a renter, who replaces the light bulbs?

I replace my own. You could demand that they come fix your light bulbs, I guess, but I've always just changed my own. I hope this doesn't get anyone fussed at but when chis stayed in our guest house by the way he didn't pay rent or anything he just worked with me and

stuff but but um when he moved out to my surprise all the light bulbs were burnt out this was a time in our like evolution where like most people had contact compact fluorescent bulbs but when they burnt out you replace them with LEDs. That's the stage we were in. And all these compact fluorescent bulbs had burnt out. And he was like, I was just sort of staying here. I'm not going to replace your light bulbs. I was like, huh, I'd never heard of that.

But okay. So we had like eight bulbs to replace. He just slowly acclimated to a darker place. And I noticed he was always in the dark over there, but I didn't ever knock. He's got candles. He's walking around like Ripton and Winkle with one of those finger holders. He would visit us.

He would come over and he'd play Rift with Jackie and Colin and stuff, board games. But I didn't knock on his door and intrude in his privacy. Torch. I think he just stole your fucking light bulbs, man. He could have just... I'm not replacing your copper

piping either. Don't even start. The wiring in the walls was gone when I got there. I want Chiz's side on this. Because what you've done here is you've changed the topic. We were talking about landlords and tenants. If Chittis had been paying you a rate, then yeah, man, you're responsible for everything in there.

You don't break anything either because you're... But he was a guest. Okay, okay. He was a guest. If Taylor comes and stays with me for whatever reason, if Taylor and I said, hey, you know what? Let's do the Macho Men YouTube channel. You come stay with me for a month and we'll film working out

here. I'll come stay with you for a month. We'll film there. We made the Macho Men YouTube channel where we just do voices and we're not all that big. That's a good ass channel. Take this part out. He's in my guest room and he's in my guest room and uh and he's

in my gym and he's burning light bulbs and i got that i don't think that he should be going and like getting new light bulbs so that in my opinion is what you and chis had going on right because i believe chis was there to film a little project it's all about perspective yeah yeah i didn't look at it through that lens i definitely see your point yeah and there was never any ill will i just struck me of course not either way i'm sure he was like you know what i i acclimated to the darkness in uh in like in the spirit of shitting on landlords like i have had bad experiences with big companies like the place i worked or not worked i lived before this like five years ago in that apartment i must have called a dozen times over the course of almost two years, like, hey, I've got an alarming amount of black mold in my back entryway.

And I stopped using my back entryway entirely. You could come from the parking lot behind my place that was fenced in up to my apartment apartment or you could walk around through death alley and and come in through the front and so i always like would walk through the you know homeless alley just to get around so i would take my chances with the homeless instead of the black mold they just didn't care they just couldn't care less it's like hey like it's it's like i've you know i've done some googling and they and the internet tells me like this is alarming like it shouldn't be a torso amount of mold in the top of like your torso. Like like from my neck down to my like waist and as wide just a patch of black mold and like slowly spreading, spreading, spreading. Like I thought I think I could smell it and they never fixed it.

It's like the fucking Stranger Things underworld or whatever it is What's that called upside down? The upside down I think yeah, yeah I knew it was something kind of had a cool way of saying it was a weirdly good show for how many like I only Heard about it from like 13 year olds, but it was a strangely good show I watched all of it and I watched all of it somewhat recently call it like two or three months ago and I'm a huge Steve the Hare Harrington fanboy.

He's the guy who makes that show. Everyone hates on him but he's my favorite guy. My experience with the show was I watched season one and I fucking loved it and then I got arrested and I could no longer smoke weed

and watch the show and I thought that that was what made the show so fun that I love that 80s synth music. I love that. And so I said, you know what? I'll pick it up again when I can smoke weed again. And I didn't. And now there's like four or five seasons.

I think you need cocaine or something for the final seasons. What's happened is their storytelling gets a little fouled up. And it's like every show has five concurrent storylines going on and you have to keep up with all of them. And too much happens in every episode. It gets to be a lot. I've only seen the first season of that show and I kind of lost interest in it. It's,

it's pretty much like a, it's, it's very good to solid all the way through. It's not ever bad. There's cinematography. The VFX are good. It hits all those markers for what a reviewer would say about it. I'm on season

two of From now. I'm almost caught up on that. I think I'll be maybe two episodes in. There's maybe four out so far. I'm almost caught up on that. I think I'd be maybe two episodes in. There's maybe four out so far. So I'm just too down. I'm enjoying it. I am a little frustrated by the speed at which it's going and how that can sometimes play out in incompetently slow-witted and slow-moving characters. It's absolutely driving me nuts.

There's a scene where they set up like a piece of electronics outdoors and the rain starts to come. Oh my God. Oh my God. They have like 18 people on the case of moving it in and they can't get it accomplished in time. Is this huge issue for them? Let me quickly tell them like what we're talking about. And Finn says,

so from is this show, the first season of it is on Amazon prime, the second season, you know, North America is this shit is anyway i've been watching on mgm plus but i'm sure you could find a different way uh basically it's lost but instead of an island these people got there because their cars they were driving along on a road could have been in georgia could have been in california but they saw a tree in the middle

of the road and they're like huh gotta turn back to turn back the other way. And the other way turned out to be just now this loop of a road in kind of a pocket universe with a little abandoned town in it. And the town's got people who this also happened to in it. They're all just stuck there with whatever supplies they came with in their cars. And at night monsters come and they eat you if you don't and you have to stay inside. And it's just like Lost. Every episode you're like you're like oh my god not only are there monsters there's there's demons now and what there's the the ground is hollow like every every episode it's a new crazy mystery that you're finding out and i've been enjoying it it's got the black guy from lost which i want them at the end to tie this back into Lost, like with him somehow.

Go ahead and do that for me. God damn it. How is from Hurley's Dream? I just wanted to make a little reference to Lost. I love it when they do that. Who played Barney in How I Met Your Mother? He's Neil Patrick Harris. He's gay. Yeah, yeah.

If Neil Patrick Harris just makes a little reference to how he's uh neil patrick harris and he's gay yeah yeah if neil patrick harris just makes a little you know reference to how he's what did he used to say he was awesome but he sang it out uh i haven't seen that show really anyway if he would just like make a reference to his catchphrase in the old show i love it when they do that this guy should be like oh i'm afraid the others are out there or just. Dead did that a lot. It'd be fun to do that. I know they had Negan's bat in an episode of Supernatural, and then

Negan had the gun from Escape from New York. He had Snake Plissken's gun in an episode, which is an awful gun. It's like a suppressed MAC with a rifle scope on it. So the eye relief doesn't make sense.

You hold it at arm length and the scope doesn't work, but you can't hold a Mac. The actor who played Glenn and maybe there's more crossover was in a cartoon called Invincible. And in Walking Dead, there's a handful of Invincible action figures and stuff in it. I love that cartoon.

I can't wait until I make another action. I love that goddamn cartoon. I can't wait until they make another season. It's been a while. Is it two years or something? I've had the comic book because I've been like, I'm going to wait until they make the next season and then I will read the comic book. But they're taking ages and I love that goddamn show. It's so good.

I've heard the show and the comic book are significantly out of order compared to each other very different right i guess it's a bit like the boys where technically it's a thing and it was a bad comic book i think invincible was good right that was the consensus that the comic's good but you know they don't want people spoiling it so they change it i saw i saw a teaser for it the other day for season two i think and it had that yeah and it had that Cyclops alien that flew to like hey is

Earth protecting itself well you know it's it's fucking Seth Rogen and then and so it's him and Invincible sort of chatting about where's season two and I think that's what it was I think it was some sort of like breaking the fourth

wall chat in a diner between the two of those but I saw it months ago and I think now so I'm guessing. I think it was some sort of like breaking the fourth wall chat and a diner between the two of those. But I saw it months ago and I think now, so I'm guessing it'll be out this year. I hope so. That's, that's one of the things I look forward to more than anything. Everybody I've shown invincible to,

even if they don't traditionally like animation, they can get into it. Woody had me fucking sucked in when he told me that pink chick was going to have a lot of camel toe, but I just never saw it. I thought there gonna be deep camel toe like i but you were in a cartoon camel toe yeah taylor's coming across a little kink shamey hey what's your problem man that's what you need fencer i i don't i get these pictures of bulges you need to get work some camel toe into this shit like you want to know those little moose not false You're almost false pussies you want to know a crazy fucking thing that I learned about from someone

I'm out. I won't name because it will definitely expose what they're into Thank you thing So you guys okay you guys have heard of cat chastity cages right yes, you know how they work I'll take this one step at a time are you aware that some of them actually have like a cylinder that pushes your dick back in you i didn't oh jesus i didn't know that was a thing you could do so what happens if that can't be someone i've seen someone push their dick back inside themselves and like wrap their balls around their dick before it's it's almost where i'm going is almost that it's like remember those

90s commercials where they'd show you this device to make your mom's hair go into like 30 different do's if you twist it the right way it's like that for your junk i'm old enough for that joke i loved it that's a remarkably similar thing like essentially what happens is you tuck your balls back into you you tuck your dick back into you and then you're left with scrote right what you can do your balls are back into you as well yeah oh that's common though that's just tucking i can do that shit everyone you never like put the waistband of your trousers on a little bit weird and one of them just fucking and it feels weird yeah man yeah i'm them all the way up in there. Yeah. One of them, like,

this little 3D printable contraption is what I was told, which is like it doesn't look anything like it just looks like two ovals, essentially. But you thread your ball skin through it, and it looks like a labia by the end of it. So all of your shit's back in you, and you create a vagina-looking thing.

Alright, don't do that so just just get some dude just to get one of those like it looks like a like an athletic cup but it's just a vagina like like like who are you trying to fool here like i just want some camel toe like it seems like that's too low tech of a solution. Seems like Finn's got a whole sort of tuck and tie. Very early 2000s. Camel toe is one of my favorite things. Really? For some reason, women in the last 20 years just decided they didn't mind showing their camel toes. In my day, women did their best to conceal a camel toe.

It was like, oh, is my slip showing? Is my panty line showing? Is my camel toe showing? Nope, all good. Do I have barbecue sauce on sauce on my shirt oh let's go out then now they're like oh get it in there deep they want to they want a deep camel toe they're like he can't see my clit in these fashionable victorian just learning now i am 1000 on board with Kyle. This is a trend that's happened during my lifetime. And it's a trend that I like. You know what I haven't?

Here's the trend that I predicted and hasn't really come through. If a girl's nipples are hard, she gets an overwhelming amount of attention. People see those hard nipples and they're like, fuck, this is great. But I haven't seen girls like try to make it happen promote it happen i haven't seen bras with pebbles on the front or anything like that i i don't know why the hard nipple or fake hard nipple trend hasn't taken hold yet you might have just created a good product idea all right here's the product idea it makes more sense for like people like you finn um but it would be a bra that you could have like a little

remember those air jordans oh yeah all right you got a little pump you know down in your pocket literally be in your pocket you can pump your uh that's perfectly concealed it goes it's in your pocket runs up your leg up to your fake titties and you pump those those those like nipples hard but oh it's a good idea you know i i just want it on the side. If I see a girl flapping like a chicken, we know the nipples are coming out. Oh, that's so much better. Oh my God, that reminds me. You know about the penal implants,

how those work, right? You know a fourth job. This is the implant that helps you get hard. I think it was more in vogue before sildenafil became a thing, but I think it's still people have to get it who are non-responsive to any of the pills

or even the injections. Basically, they put an inflatable thing in your dick and in your gooch between your balls and your your ass you've got like a nipple like a basketball or a football has like an athletic ball do you remember those air jordans you could pump like to jump higher yeah is it good yeah it's like it's exactly that is like above your dick to the side like where your pubic hair would be. There's a button and they press on that. I once saw a guy on a talk show. It might have been Oprah. If not, it was something like it.

He loved his so much. He's like, this is the greatest thing. You force the accent, and I'm solid, rock hard. He's like, every guy needs this. They're like, no, not every guy. He's like, no, you should have it as a backup just in case.

I was like, oh. Everyone should have expensive invasive surgery. I was young. I'm like seven years old. Like, well, shit, I guess I might need a backup. I don't know. Seven years old. I should be watching something else.

It's like a very clear memory for you. Daytime TV, stay home from school sick. This this is what you learn i guess you didn't see a picture you can't see a button like you can't see like a push-out area of like oh that's where his dick button is from what i get oh finster maybe you know something yeah those guys say i know there's like so trans guys this is a big thing for them for obvious reasons when you get like so for example like you're transitioning from female to male right now testosterone is crazy it can do cool shit but it can't grow you a dick so they'll have like a penis sort of they'll construct you a dick but the dick won't work we're not quite at that level of tech so there's one that i've seen that is essentially like a

switch like a light switch under your skin you can just sort of dook right on your side and it will just you don't need to charge the thing often or at least love for years and it will just robo dick i want to explain away the usbc connector in my you're like you're like dick techs out like yeah you're like 70 years old you have five dongles attaching your dick woody that thing's fucking cool. The RGB lights were my idea. I was just imagining if you bump into a doorframe.

You bump into a doorframe. You're always getting stopped by TSA. I'm so afraid of a car accident. And it's like, sir, you would have been fine. But your penis was activated. And it exploded, sir. It exploded. I'm sorry. Was there anything left? No.

Nothing. We made the decision based on what was remaining and well, sir, we made you a vagina. We had to make a call and I did it. I'm a shot caller. So I had an idea

for you Finn for an even additional revenue stream have you considered foxy boxing huh I haven't even heard of it everybody's doing boxing now and if you haven't heard of foxy boxing it's where girls

dress up in foxy scantily clad outfits and then they box and so you could either take an easy route, challenge a woman, or... You need to design it. You could do it in America. We allow that.

Yeah, we allow that. Florida? For sure. The Fallon Fox fighter? Actually, not Florida. No, no, no. Never mind. Florida's the worst. They lock you up just for existing.

Oh, my God. Yeah. We were planning a... Okay, hold on. I won't skip the subject. The boxing thing. Do you want to know some insider information into the Creator Clash thing that went on?

Like the first Creator Clash or the second one, technically? Yeah. A friend of mine was due to be... A girl was due to be in creator clash too. This did not come to fruition. Where did credit clash happen? The second one was at Florida. It was at LA or some shit.

I think so. Either way, Florida, but basically like it never ended up happening because they needed to find, first of all, holy shit, the PR of that. There's no way to make that go right. If you have also she was strong as shit like she was a trans girl right so she transitioned to be a woman wasn't always yeah but also like not like what i'm looking like uh you know like she did it and got jacked like she just really liked that look so she's got like she's strong as fuck for anyone

what's her name is have you going to say that? It was Marisa. Or Mia Reza on Twitter if you've heard of her. But like, yeah, she was due to fight someone. I think she talked about this before. But like, she was due to fight someone and it ended up not happening because the laws around that, you

have to find someone. So she had like her birth certificate, anything like that wasn't amended yet. So it said like like a her birth certificate anything like that wasn't uh amended yet so it said like male on the birth certificate like sex so the boxing commission had to get someone that was in the exact same position as her which is extremely rare because there's not many trans people that exist and especially ones that still have like male on their certificate for like legal reasons so i'd find it pretty hard to find an opponent, I'd think. I could fight a dude, but I think everyone would look down on the dude that I fight.

No, just find a sneaky still dress up. You gotta find another dude who does what you do. I could kick the shit out of Sneaky. I'd win that fight. That's the confidence we need! Sneaky, I've got him on Discord. Hit me up. I'm down down to fight sneaky if there's anyone

i'm not even joking like i'd have to watch that like that would be so fun i've got big hands man i don't think people quite realized how like the the aesthetic of me doesn't scream like a bigger dude i'm like 5 10 5 10.24 yeah and i got like big fuck do i have anything that's like a measurable size like a standard size thing fuck i have no it'd be uk standard size so we have no idea sort of fucking big my shit my hands are bro i can do some damage you could throw you got some meat hooks you pulverize anyone you go up against this finger and you've got looks like you have Andoril in the background as a little bit of extra

security, right? Is that Andoril the sword? Aragorn's sword? It's just a random claymore I think someone sent me. Just a random claymore? I can't remember. Did it have the same name after it was reforged? It changed, right? The name? I guess, yeah. It became Andoril.

It was the Shards of Narsil. But before that, it was something. Narsil. We need to get to the bottom of this. We do. We need to spend, what do we got, three hours and 21 minutes. It's not going to be enough. I wrote down, I wanted to ask you, Finn, what was the bridge too far?

An internal limit in your head where you're like all right i'm not getting fake tits are you gonna fold your dick and balls up into a fake pussy i'm not doing that i think the what how do you mean like what's the what's the one step too far is there like a is there like a limit in your only fans where you're like well no i want to know what's the step before it's too far like like that's that's the better that's what i want to know what's the most you're willing to do when the thing with bell that i had to really quickly clarify because everyone just assumed that we fucked and that was something on only i can tell you that fuck it do you want to hear some like actual number like some dollar amounts because it's kind of funny how it worked out that bell

delphine picture made me fifty thousand dollars posting that on twitter like right and then i had to clarify oh yeah and by the way one month later when all those subs renew no one stayed so it's because they all thought that we fucked uh we did not fuck and i had to like make an instagram story it was like i don't do porn i'm not gonna do porn i'm that's not what i'm gonna do i'm very very single right now. Yeah. Well, okay. I didn't know that So I'm sort of I'm all over the place, you know I turns so a fun thing that happens when you start an OnlyFans is then People start hitting you up for shit. Like I'm get it like I'll get hit up by

relatively popular people that also have an only fan dude so some of the hottest women on earth will hit me up in my dms and say like hey do you want to collab and they do porn so that is essentially a professional business email for hey you want to fuck which is cool as fuck and i have to turn them down every time so i'm like no you don't have to that's not true that's true but they want to film it. You should sit. My move would always be, you know, let's do a test run. See how we feel about each other. Because I don't want to upload content if we're both not feeling it.

You don't do that. So we do a test run, make sure we like each other, and then, you know, we come back around full circle. It's called business due diligence. I don't make any sort of business decisions without trying every way from Sunday. So it works. I do really love the idea. Me and a friend of mine have been joking around about the idea of like we should film.

I should film something. Just get something recorded because we both really like the idea, the aesthetic of having like a usb just a random shitty flash drive just like would scrolled across it like sex tape and it's worth like i don't know how much that should be what like in i reckon i could clear like a good half million to a million if i released the sex any chance that you like escalate to that like it's belle delphine right she went ages and never showed her labia right like that was like her sort of calling card until she did and then it wasn't long before that when she was actually doing like penetrative sex do you think that you'll ever escalate beyond where you are now oh yeah no so the plan is to just keep going because it's only been a thing for

like two and a half months so the plan is every month i'm just gonna keep upping it a bit i i think it would be a bit like it'd be like spoiling a movie if i said where i wanted it to go by x time but yeah no i'll get there i respect it i respect it yeah get in on the ground floor boys finster yeah i need like an investor you want to get your username into finn's feed as much as possible. That way one day he recognizes it and he thinks, oh, I know that guy. Maybe I'll fuck that guy. We're going to have a personal relationship at this point that we've

built over the years. If you give Finnster $35 a month, there's a non-zero chance you'll have sex with him. I mean, this is the secret. This is the secret that OnlyFans people don't want you to know is they want

a relationship with you personally they try to keep it under wraps but they love it when you reach out and like fuck it come to the house it's great we love meeting you we always fuck you that's the rule what?

we always fuck you. That's the rule. What? We always fuck you. With the Claymore. Amaranth gets up. If you follow Amaranth's second account on Twitter, I think it's like every week she's like, look at this new stalker that we got on CCTV trying to break into my home. It's fucked. it's such a popular i'm real uncomfortably attractive it's uh it's uh that's a good looking lady i think she's fun like i see her interviewed now and then and

she they asked her something about her fans and she's like ah they they can't really type that well with one hand. That's funny. I could not tell you what her voice sounds like. I have no idea. Couldn't pick it out of a lineup, but I've heard it before. Could not pick her voice out, but I know exactly what she looks like. Yeah. She's been on a couple good podcasts.

She's been on all the interviews. She did Anthony Padilla. Yeah, but I've got to listen to somebody a lot, especially if it's a woman's voice, to be able to differentiate it from other women. Don't you think that's true? It's harder to differentiate women's voices women. Don't you think that's true? It's harder to differentiate women's voices from one another than it is

men's? Men seem distinctive to me. Maybe. I guess I never really give them that much thought. I guess it's like... I mean, is this one of those all-women Santa-like sort of thing? It's cool. I'm taking a step to that.

They're all high-p pitched and whiny stop stop stop ouch yeah you know you know how women are. Jesus Christ. I didn't want to completely get away from From, though. I do want people to watch it because I think it's a fun show. It's not some AAA title. It's not fucking Breaking Bad or Game of Thrones, but it's a real fun show to watch.

I watch it as soon as it comes out because I want to know. I'm going to be so mad if they're fucking us over and they have no idea what the all the answers to all the goofy ass questions they're they're asking. I need to know. Is God is it God? Is it demons? Is it magic? Is it warlocks and wizards? Is it they make it clear they're not dead.

I feel like they've told us three times that they're not dead. Yeah, they ask the question. There's a this is not a spoiler, but there's one group in the show that writes their stuff on the wall in an effort to figure out the overarching mystery. And they asked, are we dead? And then they explain it. They keep ensuring us it's not purgatory. It's not death. So that I think we're supposed to know.

I think it bugs me. No Bibles? Yeah, please go. I'm sorry. Yeah Yeah interesting about the Bibles I I got knocked off my train of thought Oh it's better as a binge watch I think because I think sometimes these episodes

Can move a little slow they have this Overarching mystery that they're gonna Like I'm what 14 hours Into it now and I've only learned A bit it is better If you can just watch them back to back if i watched if if one of these episodes came out and that was all i had for the whole week and there was 90 seconds worth of forward motion it would frustrate me yeah there's multiple plot lines one

of the interesting things and i'm not going to spoil anything here but the season finale of season one had three different cliffhangers it's like like three different crazy there was there was the crazy thing happening at the diner there was a crazy thing happening in the basement of a house there was crazy shit happening off in the woods um and there may have been more i don't remember the diner thing um you drop it showed up at the end of season one uh oh oh it that was unusual yeah yeah an unusual thing happened there so so so then it ends and you're i can't imagine having to wait a year like i'd have completely forgotten but but it made me instantly buy that stupid fucking mgm plus app

that has nothing else on it my camera overheated your backup camera somebody's hot it's like you've got a man hot in the uk it's awful do not does every house have air conditioning in the uk nowhere has air conditioning i've been in like i know one millionaire in england and he doesn't have air conditioning it's i would bet what in north carolina children's tree houses have air conditioning it's a safety issue yeah i don't i don't know why we don't do it i think it's just that it's hot for three weeks in a year when i hear that all the time that's bullshit that's such bullshit they say that i i vacationed in uh washington state in seattle i think or maybe outside seattle and they don't have ac there they're like yeah it's only hot here for like three weeks a month.

Well, that's when we were there. That's when we were there then. Holy shit. We had fans all over the place ordering them off Amazon. It was terrible. I'm into this reef-keeping thing, basically saltwater aquariums. All those fuckers in England have chillers for their fish while they sit there sweating in their living rooms

because you need them. Yeah, that's something we have over the their living rooms. Because you need them. That's something we have over the UK. We've got that thing. You can still buy portable ACs, but they suck. Dude, you have one of those here, you get bullied. Look at this dumbass.

Yeah, you really want a window unit too. You don't want your compressor inside the house putting all its heat in. It's fighting with itself. Silly him. You want central air conditioning it's got a tube there's not enough space in the floors because we have like brick like it was what i so i asked of renovating this house and i asked about like oh shit how much would it be for me to get like actual real air conditioning and it's it's not expensive two and a half weeks income not even that I'm going to have to jack off on camera or something

it's going to take me three days to pay for all this you've probably seen commercial places that do this you just do that exposed metal industrial ducting overhead just supported by because what do you fucking care it looks good to me

there's no room you're talking like british house british roof ceilings yeah we have like real low ceilings in every house and then the floors it's made out the houses are physically smaller there's no room in the walls what do y'all do better than us huh what do y'all do better than us what's what's better over there because you're like our houses are small and hot and they're wet for three weeks of the year. We go semi-aquatic. I'm like, day-to-day life. What do you think's better?

There's nothing. I'm trying to leave. There's literally, like, it depends who you are. Like, if you're someone, like, very low income, UK's the place to be. Because we have so much better social programs and shit. But if you're a fucking OnlyFans guy or girl or YouTuber, then yeah, America is the place because everyone that you know is over in America.

Makes sense. Bell's here. Well, you just need to marry someone. I'm working on the visa. We've been fine. Well, let me marry someone to come to America. I was like, Kyle's just giving out terrible financial advice right now

why don't you just buy a fucking boat while you get married a house boat you have no idea you don't get it I am'm in the woman's position. I get to marry up. That's what I can do now. I've got to now find someone up. Teddy Murphy.

There's a lot of billionaires in Florida. Ex-New York guys who want the heat. There's a lot of strippers there. Find one of them. Which I think is the move. Marry a stripper? Get your visa, marry a stripper? There has to be some stuff that the UK does better.

Get her out of that club and on your OnlyFans. And, I mean, she pays for herself in, I don't know, three seconds? Yeah, we do food better. It's so much better. It's one second longer than I'd last. You think your food is better?

No, it's dog shit. It's dog shit? I think our food is okay it gets a bad rap the only thing that we do right there yeah and it's still dude like i just imagine like italy and france constantly gossiping about the uk's food like just always being like can you get believe this the beans for breakfast it has been like fucking 500 years and they'll still eat beans for breakfast. Like or whatever the fuck French people sound like. That's it. That is that's honestly that's that's the part of you of English culture.

I hate the most is like trying to act as though beans for breakfast is is normal, is acceptable, is a way to start the day. No wonder you guys fell off when that started becoming a... The alignment of the UK's collapse and a proper English breakfast aligns perfectly. My anger is climbing. I've made beans on toast for now three different Americans, and all of them resoundingly said, that's all right. Beans on toast, it's exactly what I thought it would be. Yeah, it's soggy. I'm ready

to seize the day. Carpe diem. Unanimously better than expected, but not... Can't wait to be gassy by noon. Yeah, if you're lucky. What do we have that's the equivalent of that? I know that people make fun of all of our bullshit dessert breakfasts

where people eat pop tarts and stuff. To me, biscuits and gravy, like southern biscuits and gravy, seems so... I grew up eating it, but still. I would still love to eat it. It seems absurd. It's an indulgent breakfast. We take a biscuit, which is different from your biscuits.

It's this big flaky, buttery flour thing that's savory and salty, and they tear it into little bits, and then they pour white country gravy on it, which is made by making a roux of butter and flour and then adding what? I think milk or cream,

half and half, depends how fatty you want it to be, and then salting and peppering it, and it becomes this delicious breakfast treat. You just complained about the soggy beans on toast thing and you're just putting liquid on bread it becomes like a porridge almost like a meat and there's chunks of sausage in the gravy i didn't mention that um yeah that to me is a weird breakfast that we eat and i would understand if someone saw that and thought it was weird the same way poutine to me is i don't know the gravy sliding in there seems a little off i've had it before though it was fucking good so i don't know this i i just admire the i just admire the american confidence to have the only we've got like american branded restaurants here we

walk past a few i've never been in one but it's just all branded like you want pancakes and waffles and just dessert it's a dessert parlor that's all there is i admire that about you people it's great i really don't understand how that even fucking happened uh like i went to ihop a while back for breakfast and they're not even pretending anymore. It's like cupcake pancakes. I swear to God, I'm not making that up. There's a cupcake pancake. They put a sparkler in like a butter tray for your birthday. It was like the treleche or whatever pancakes, like every decadent dessert you can imagine. Carrot cake pancake.

When I was a kid kid like the crazy thing on the menu was the smiley face pancake that they would make for a kid and it was just a little whipped cream man yeah it was like can you believe it they put whipped cream on there for breakfast yeah now i once had a smiley cake smiley face pancake but it was made out of blueberries it's so scary looking it looks like a hard i know exactly what you're talking about i can picture it's like bleeding purple it's like mouth is screaming in pain you know what you know what's funny is like in america you scroll down this and you're like you know let's take it easy. Original buttermilk, please.

The least decadent one. Now they do like a protein. I can't feel my left foot already, so give me the Harvest Grain and Nut. Red Velvet. That looks good. Good OnlyFans post-it. They all look fucking good. They do a protein pancake too that's not as crazy,

but I'm not sure if they even have sugar-free syrup at that place. The idea of anything but sugar-free syrup to me is like it. Look at that shit. I mean, come on. It's a birthday cake. Kyle, I agree with where you were going on that.

So sometimes when I go for like a sugar-free alternative, it's a bit of a sacrifice, right? You know, in my coffee in particular, I find it very tolerable to have Stevia instead of sugar, but it's not bit of a sacrifice, right? You know, in my coffee in particular, I find it very tolerable to have stevia instead of sugar, but it's not the same. It's not as good. I find my almond cream to be very tolerable. I enjoy it, but it's not as good as real half and half. But if you were to put sugar-free syrup and regular syrup in front of me, I'm not sure I could

identify which one I had. It's the same. I'll say this. If you snuck the sugar-free into the sugar bottle, I wouldn't complain. Oh, so you could tell. It would never come to me. If you put them side by side, especially like... All right. Well, if I could read the bottle, sure. Well, if I knew I was...

If I was doing the Pepsi challenge between two empty cups, for example, but there's some maple syrups that they make like a fine scotch where they age the maple syrup in smoked bourbon barrels. There's multiple

grades of it. The different regions and what kind of weather they had that year affects the taste of the maple syrup. I could get down with something like that. For the most part, that sugar-free what's the name of it something farms i think we get the same one off amazon we do yeah it's like it's a it's 10 calories for like two big spoonfuls of syrup it's what's it made out of it i thought syrup is super what is it's some kind of fake sugar and gelatin i guess and it smells like, I guess. And it smells like maple.

When you pour it, it's like maple syrup. I make this for breakfast. What I do a lot, it's egg beaters, which is egg whites that they chemically make look yellow and thick and not like jizz. I pour that onto three pieces of low-carb torn and with like cinnamon and sweetener in it and bake that. And I've got this like eggy custardy bread thing that I soak with that sugar free syrup. It's so good. It's so good. It's good for you.

I just ordered it off Amazon. It's the orders being processed on its way. Okay, let's go. It's good. As far as artificial sugar stuff goes, it's the orders being processed on its way okay it's good as far as artificial sugar stuff goes just got that sugar-free syrup money just tossing it how much uh how much how much weight have you lost from from say fencer from say like a year ago i'm i'm 60 so the heaviest i was was don't do kilos get a goddamn calculator out

we're using the lord's units and if you say stone i swear i was about to say and it's never impressive it went from 17 to 16 stone oh i hate that oh i lost a lot of weight 17 knife stone now i weigh 16 5 and it's like get your units right dumb england's just that old. We measured shit in rocks. But I was like, at my heaviest, I was 172 pounds at 5'10". And right now, I try to actually gain a little bit of weight, but

if you asked me a week ago, I was 132 pounds. 132 is 5'10". That's thin. That is thin. Ladies, take notes. Yes, ladies. God. Ladies, take notes. Yes, ladies. God. Men are even better at being women.

This man has denser bones. He has a higher concentration of muscle mass, right? He has every excuse that women make for being overweight. Literally big bones. He has every one of them. And he's blown past them to be 5'102 5 10 132 well it's with man bones also like a cool aesthetic that i found is like i've also gotten lean i didn't just look so i lost weight eating a basically just a shit ton of protein but like lower calories i did like a bunch of maths i

found a i found a vegetarian substitute for chicken that has a better calorie to protein ratio than chicken. Which is kind of dope. Yeah. What is it again? The actual brand name is called... This is the stupidest name. It's called What the Cluck. I hate it.

I like it. You can just throw it in an air fryer. I throw a bunch of fucking like msg some garlic salt and stuff tastes great and then i make like a little sauce sugar-free it's like some soy sauce and like sugar-free chili thing and i'll mix that up tastes fucking great it's like 400 calories and like 50 grams of protein or something else oh i got a subreddit for you it's called 500 is enough and it's all all about, it's mostly ladies and femboys. And I don't mean like femboys is how they present.

I mean, little dudes whose metabolism support these, you know, 1500 calories a day. And so they have, they have these perfect 500 calorie meals that they eat. And it's, it's called 500 is enough,

or maybe it's enough for a day. It actually might be 500 calories a day or maybe it's enough for a day it actually might be 500 calories a day 500 is not enough for a day it's something like that i remember i've got it around what i stay my when i'm cutting i go to shitty restriction food have you ever seen that this is really for people with eating disorders and they'll'll be like, here's lunch. And it's a fucking cracker and a grape. And it's always like a sugar-free monster energy drink thrown in on top of it. The White Monster Ultra? Yeah, those ones are good. Unappealing.

The White Monster Ultra is... I'm used to seeing it as I scroll. That White Monster Ultra is like the quintessential trans girl drink. That's a meme. That's the biggest of all the monsters. They hit it out of the park with the white one. It's the best flavor. The trans women, they claim that one.

I think we should take that away from them. Trans people have too many rights anyway. I reckon we take that one. They just got Bud Light and now they're going to take Monster White? No. I'll share it with them. Is it never enough? I posted a photo with Mr. Beast.

Oh, sorry, Chris from Mr. Beast because they recently came out as trans and I met them in Japan, which was very fun. But I took the photo while I was holding a monster can because that's what everyone was drinking on set and I got quote retweets like, holy shit, the finster's trans,

this isn't coming out. Cause I'm normally. Are you going to get to be in a Mr. Beast video? I bet if you, Oh my God, if you want to, how long do you want to talk about this?

The Mr. Beast set and the whole video process was maybe one of the most insane things I've experienced ever. It's whatever you was it for? Or has he not released this one yet? It's not released yet. I think it'll be out in a couple months. But the answer is no. There's no fucking way I'm in it. Whatever you think

a MrBeast video is like, it's not. It's like a... I think when I got invited to it, so Chris phoned me up one day and said like, hey, I need... They recently came out as trans online. And they sort of went, hey, I kind of need, they're all from North Carolina, I think. And they said, hey, I need some sort of queer presence in my life.

I need someone that understands what the fuck this is. Do you want to come on this all expense paid trip to Japan? And I went, yeah, that sounds dope. And it's in four days. But, like, yeah, getting there, I was told it was going to be, like, a director or two, some producers, a few cameramen, some audio guys. What you'd expect to be an on-loc people out film it probably two three minutes of a video and we we didn't get the amount of crew that were there and security we didn't even see them in one place there were at least 40 to 50 people on this thing it's much less like a youtube video even at

the highest end of things and more like a movie set. I have as much chance of being in a Mr. V's video than like the audio tech, just walking onto a Marvel movie and saying, I want to be, I want to be that superhero over there. Let me be in that one that you've got no chance. You can't sneak into the crowd. There's like four layers before you get, I spoke to Jimmy like a good bit,

but like not on, not while things were happening. You can't get there. It's kind of difficult to explain without saying what we did, but there was a scene when we were on a boat and that was the only time that we were allowed sort of close

to the set, I guess, or close to where they were sort of filming stuff. And we were relegated to the girlfriends and wives table that was sort of off to the side um but it was still fun it was really cool to watch happen mr beast was on this show and he was telling us about some of the like logistics issues he had i didn't even think of it but so for example i think he did a video where he put a million orbits obits something like that in somebody's yard so this is like a little jelly bean,

but when it gets wet, it swells up to like 10 times its normal size or bees. Okay. And you would, I was like, all right, so I guess I just bought a million or buying a million or bees is a thing. You can't go to dollar general and buy them. They don't have a million of them or whatever it is, a billion, some giant number. you can't go to all the dollar generals in town you can't go to walmart you you have to contact orbeez and have them produce a million outside of the normal supply chain and then to ship it over you have to get a shipping container for just your orbeez on a on a tanker i don't even what they're called some big cargo ship that's what it it's called. To come over the Atlantic from like China where they're made to you. And he has like all these videos coming out.

All this stuff is happening like simultaneously. The lead times for the logistics on these videos is shocking. It's a really big deal. So if you watch Mr. Beast, maybe more so his old stuff, he came across, he played a dumb kid in his videos. But he's actually an ambitious man who's like putting a lot of, wow, who's putting a lot together. And I'm happy for his success. When he gave away so much money, I was like, bro, can you just take a little for yourself?

Just take a little for yourself. I'm worried about you. I'm worried that you're going to come out the other side of this thing having done so many generous acts and not be wealthy yourself and i was so wrong he's doing fine he's doing great he's killing it meeting him with the way i kept describing it after like the first day we we've talked is that if you were going to make a cartoon of a rich guy it's kind of what mr beast is like but nice we went to a we went part of this video i think there was like a cool down period they were sort of exploring the area where we were and part of it was like oh there's like a casino and in japan there's like um

pachinko machines and stuff there's like japanese gambling that's like a big thing i don't know lots of anime cool shit and so we were with the sort of crew were there security was like guarding the door so you can't you can't really get in unless you're you know in the fucking team but like uh he would just walk around he won like two grand but they uh in uh what japanese currency there's just one dollar is an equivalent to like a one coin so he's got a plastic like grocery bag just filled with these fucking things like about a thousand dollars in just coins and he'd just grab a handful and just you want to gamble with me like letting them drop fucking every every one that day was

littered with a like snail's trail of coins that's my that's my career path someday i'll be a yes man for him yes sir jimmy it's a really hard job you gotta like leave your hand on the hood of a car for seven days without rest or something yeah he like he like resents me and bullies me he's like eat this bowl of roaches loser i'm like like crying it's like think fast he's like shooting a shotgun full of gold bouillon at me like oh you got you got gold in your chest you should have caught i saw a tiktok or something the other day where they did kind of like an old school fear factor challenge just on the street and it was for so little money like it was like a couple of dollars every cup every cup had a dollar amount on it you lift the cup first one i think there was like a cricket under there like you eat the cricket you get the

dollar he eats cricket they give him the dollar the next bucket cup whatever says like five dollars on it he's like now you can risk the dollar and lift the five the five dollar uh cup but if you don't eat it you lose your dollar and he's like i'll do it and it's like a worm and he keeps going until he's eating like fear factor level cockroaches and scary ass spiders and i think he cleaned up with a with a cool 1750 or something it was awful it was awful i couldn't believe it joe rogan yelling at him chew chew chew chew if joe rogan came back for fear factor i think they could get people to do much more awful things just because they're there with joe like so there there's such a culture that that respects and likes and has a fandom for joe there would be some bro on there it's like what do you need me to do

mr rogan what do you need some of the like funniest clips i've seen of rogan is him talking about fear factor like what he was thinking as the host like someone asking him like so like you just like got used to guys like drinking cum and eating this stuff and he's like oh i mean i guess but it's fucking disgusting dude like i'm having to yell and encourage these people to like drink the cum faster you can do it you can do it think of your son he needs tuition it's like that would be just a surreal job to have like do it do it chew what would you do if joe rogan yelled at you to do it? What's the furthest you'd go? It would depend what the person that went before me did.

If the person that went before me was knocking it out of the park, not even gagging, eating everything, I'd really try and look like I could hang with them. But I know I couldn't. As soon as a bug touched my tongue or something, I think I'd throw up. I don't think I could even eat a cricket. a cricket factor had a bunch of different aspects to it like i feel like i'd be really strong in the like lay down in a you know coffin filled with cockroaches like that i could do uh there was

some athletic stuff like swimming underwater in an airplane and like swinging from a helicopter i feel like that that's the the kind of bravery i have the eating stuff that's not my cup of tea i i would really struggle to down a glass full of bull semen oh yeah it'd be easier i would hate skydiving like it's not an area of interest of mine but if it's like all right you have the stein of bull semen or the plane it's like strap me up i'm going like i'd go twice in the plane yeah i'll take can i drink this on the way up like this am i just not cool i reckon whoever fear-factored the type of person that can complete that who it's made for i am the opposite of that guy i can't there's not a lot of money have you ever done them have you ever heard the people that like go

they got in a shark cage underwater yeah i've seen like in the ocean like the the visual cages where you get to watch them like eat chum from real close sure my parents have done that that's that's like on my never that's my opposite of a bucket list like there's not there's there's i would do everything before that i would kill a man there's really absolutely the worst thing on earth i think that's interesting that doesn't like the i maybe i'm putting ultimate test in those cages but like i don't think i'd be nervous at all i'd be like all these guys get in the cage like i'd have the same like visualization of it i do on roller coasters where it it's like, everybody else is okay. I'll be fine.

I was going to make that exact same comparison. This is equipment that you guys use every single day that thousands have done before me. I'll trust that it didn't break right before I got here. There's that one video, though, of the shark going over the top or whatever, and now he's in the cage with the diver and he's just laying there the cages have a lid is it a weak lid is it like a tank where the top is weak or was it sometimes they have those bigger bars at the top like that aren't that are more spaced out maybe it was a

smaller shark and it swam through that if you're gonna do it you honestly want to be around some monster sharks you want to be around some big ones i don't remember exactly how he ended up in the cage i just remember when he came out i think he came out the top but the guy was fine in there you know the shark wasn't trying to get him once it was once it was stuck in a fucking cage it was just trying to get out of a goddamn cage sharks are scary did you see that video shark attacking the guy's uh boat he's like on a little it's like a canoe with a fucking sail on it really i don't know what kind of craft that is but a big ass tiger shark came out of nowhere and hit him hard like some jaw stuff that that's yeah that's so scary that's a big shark too yeah they should have closed the top this is a good time to

tell you the reason why is because i have a phobia of shark i tabbed out so fast sharks yeah like it so much so i i like i have threatened to break up with a girlfriend over her showing me a photo of a shark doing something damn i i a year-long relationship i was so deadly serious what i mean are there sharks in england is it like at all no it's a phobia that's they make no goddamn sense there's there's nothing there's like there's dudes that are afraid deathly afraid of puppies and they look like joe rogan like there's no there's no sharks in england i hadn't even thought about it i thought it was like too cold or maybe they have like cold in california shitty teeth shitty teeth sharks can't even bite you where there's no orthodontic industry yeah

they've only got one more of two yeah there's like i have no clue why it's one of those just like always been a thing because it sucks though sharks are awesome they're so cool they're like a tiger but like get more there yeah i don't i don't know why kind of grumpy like it's cool watching a shark eat something like when you watch it skyrocket out and like take that seal which is hundreds of pounds on its own and just like lift it like a little piece of paper eat the whole thing it's it's insane but like come on now the sharks do that like i'm thinking of killer whales but no there's a there's you probably know the clip i'm talking about that huge great white white that bites the fucking seal

and almost bats it up with its nose. There's killer whales doing it. There's sharks doing it. Seals apparently just huge. They never take W's. There's just an L of a species. Every now and then, one of my favorite videos is when the poor fucking seal jumps

into the back of the boat up by the engines. I love that video. And the guy's like, fucking get in here, bro! Because the shark is like right there like, oh, fuck, you've joined with the humans. That just makes you a target, surely.

How big was the boat? Big enough. I'm going to call it over 20 feet. Would you allow that sea lion or whatever it was, that seal, to just hitch a ride, or are you going to correct and send him back to nature's maw? Oh, absolutely. As long as he doesn't bite me or anything, those things

have scary teeth. This is the flip one. Sharks are just the dogs of the ocean world. Come on in, boy. Dogs of the sea. Seals, they're like little puppies they got this cute little fucking face those big black cartoon eyes

they got big teeth I'm not 100% on this but I remember someone said it on a YouTube video look at him you wouldn't let him in you'd have to that's too small of a boat to let that thing live that's too small of a boat if there's a shark in the water I don't care how cute that thing is. I'm kicking

him. I disagree. I would keep it. Now there's blood in the water and more sharks are here. Look at him. He's coming with us. He's just a little buddy. He just wants to be safe. Just let him hang out. I'm going to put a heel down that

fucker's throat. Everyone else is petting him. You're coming over the top. It's a danger. Hit it with the oar. Yeah. I don't know if I'm making this up or not, but I definitely saw someone say it in a YouTube video.

But you know that photo that you showed of the killer whale or something something just fucking yeeting that seal or whatever it was i've heard they don't even like do that because they need food they just they're just assholes they just yeah i think that might be a i know they do it to porpoises too they'll uh they like torture them and have fun with them they'll like catch them and then let them go the way a cat will uh do that with with little things but they do they almost play soccer or i don't know badminton with with them something some sort of sport where you get thrown into the air repeatedly and die slowly yeah badminton that's the one i mean the uh the killer whales Have you seen the clips of like there will be a seal on top of a floating piece of ice?

And because the killer whale can't like just leap up into it because it's a large enough piece of ice and they'll push down on their tails really hard to create suction and like pressure that pulls the ice down and then it pops back up and a big wave then like pushes the seal into the water so they like figured that shit out of like oh it's unreachable there all we have to do is create like a negative little pressure thing in the water to create a wave that pushes the seal it's it's like that's not even as clever as these things so when i lived in ocean city i would routinely watch the i don't know if they're dolphins or porpoises i can't tell the difference but they would herd the fish using there's like the beach and then a jetty and they just herd them in to the point where you'd see the fish like jumping out of the water all rabid and crazy.

And they would just get them all in there, and then they'd start eating them once they were all trapped. Wow. You're in the water with them? No, no, no, no. You could see this from the stand. Oh, okay, okay. This is why we moved out of the water.

This is why we evolved. We couldn't handle it. I generally think of killer whales as friendly to humans. You don't really hear about any stories of them hurting people. I remember there was a horror movie called Orca, and that's what it was all about. Happens in captivity. Oh, for sure in captivity. That's a different story.

That's a whole different thing. Because I think they're smart enough to make decisions. When they killed those trainers, I don't think they like it's it's like when a big bull like gets mad and just starts flailing everywhere it's not like that i think they're like motherfucker i said no and they just take them down for a little swim uh but i saw i saw an orca hit a boat i think yesterday on reddit like Come at it on purpose and terrorize the person in a small boat.

Again, kind of like that tiger shark thing. That was scary. I think of sharks as really dumb. Like eating machines. Like a binary computer. Really simple but efficient. Eat?

No eat. It's like eating and fucking. That's all it does and it doesn't even fuck well but like they can't hold on but if whenever you see one all scarred up it's mostly because they have to bite each other to fuck so like there's no way that two two big sharks can have sex and one of them not get mangled i mean it's clearly a working system evolved very much in a long time i feel like that's how you find the dumb animals exact said they're smarter than alligators alligators are another one that you could go back three million years and you'd find alligators longer they're like dinosaurs right like i think don't have a good grip on evolutionary time scale i think of i think of

those uh those guys guys as surviving dinosaurs. They're just scaled down. 80 million years? Sure, call it that. 80 million feels like 60 to me. When you get the big numbers like that, it's impossible to wrap your head around. At a certain weight of an object,

I have no idea anymore. How much does an elephant weigh? An African bull elephant? Yes. Right? 10 pounds? He. Like, yes. Right? 10 pounds. He says 20,000 pounds. Taylor says 12,000. I'll say 10,000. Finn? African bull elephant. Just off the top of your head.

You don't need to calculate. 2,000. 2,000 pounds. How much do I have? It is. I can tell you it's certainly not 2,000. 13,000. Taylor wins.

Perfect. My point is dude, I had no real idea or concept. The difference between 6,000 and 12,000 pounds, I can't look at that and tell. It's just a fucking lot. When you talk about a million years versus 10 million even,

I can't have concept of that. Those numbers are too big. I don't walk out arms. What are you talking about? I don't walk out arms, so statistically, honestly, there's no real evidence I can't lift that. No one's ever proved it. It's an unfalsifiable hypothesis.

That's true. Schrodinger's deadlift. you both can and can't until you until you try never tried we brought up rogan a while ago and it made me wonder so no world leaders or athletes who's the most famous person on earth no world leaders no athletes how wait across all age groups under 25 i'm betting mr beast anyone under 25 that is the most famous man on earth oh elon musk maybe probably the rock i was wondering i was going for like older people who are stars like tom cruise right because he's been a star for so long. Fucking Jackie Chan.

De Niro. Yeah, I don't know. Someone who's famous in China, you have to make sure that. Does it have to be China? I just mean the total number of people knowing who you are. Why didn't you pick India? India too.

Some Bollywood star is the the top guy i don't know i don't know how big is india big on our movies or is that is china bigger on it india speaks english i think i bet a lot of people know the rock he's so reckoned you don't get the rock confused with anybody else it's gonna be a musician i bet because that's more like translatable to different musicians i feel like they have more staying power like just aerosmith for example right aerosmith had a second coming when i was a teenager they were big before i was a teenager and it's my suspicion that even like you know a guy like taylor who aerosmith was never on top during his, you know, music listing days and still knows them only because of Armageddon. I think. How about Elton John?

Elton John's huge. He's played fucking everywhere. Like everybody knows who Elton John is, right? I don't know. I think this is going to be one of those things where we're just out of our depth because of our, I mean,

we're trying to reach for China and like, like, like make it a global thing, but I don't know. Oh, M&M's bigger, huh? The WWE guy who's huge outside of America and known here, he's the actor John Cena. No. John Cena's a huge celebrity in Asia.

My dad would not recognize John Cena, neither would your grandparents, I bet. But if you showed them The Rock or Arnold Schwarzenegger, they would. I think both of those guys are better options. Arnold Schwarzenegger, that's a good pick. I like that one. If you want a quick ego boost, or pick me up, I think that John Cena

follows like 500,000 people there's a good shot you're one of them and if you haven't checked, check like I think they just mass followed a bunch of accounts like he follows me he follows 500,000 people he might follow you

that's genius, that way you can follow the people you really want to follow without getting attention wow, doesn't follow me, fucking blocked John Cena I followed one person for the longest time i only followed team arts mom and if i followed one other person they'd be like you know oh this is gonna be the next guest on bj like people noticed but you just followed like the only person you follow for like a decade only team arts mom does she ever have any good tweets i can'm sure. Yeah, mostly she was proud of Trevor.

I want her to have her own thing. She's proud of her son. I don't know. She's crocheting or something. Look at this one. Yeah. T-Mart got into that CSGO like hot water and she kind of

backed off social media. Have you heard about CSGO2 yet no yes i've heard of its existence yeah csgo2 is looks so fucking cool i'm not in the beta but i wish i was you know the the whole skin thing like where what team mind got in trouble for it's it's recently just exploded again like i don't know it's a good time if you had a CSGO, you had a knife or something, and you've never played the game again. That shit's probably quadrupled in value after the announcement of that.

I bought a knife in 2016 for $150, and now it's $1,000. It's absurd. Is that your game of choice, CSGO? I'm boring. I don't play video games much now i split gate is sort of my go-to if i want to pick up a random video game you're just i just i would have loved to but csgo feels like everybody's already so good and it's so hard to be good too like those people click on you so well i know my friends be good too like those people click on you so well i know my friends i know my friends that uh came from csgo that that was their main game before whenever we go to something like tarkov or

whatever call of duty they're always really really fucking good it's um it's like if you're gonna do mma it's like being an all-american wrestler it's like oh oh are you good at csgo oh come on we just gotta you're good and you you'll get you can hit people you'll be fine it's yeah it's it's like a really translatable game oh shit my internet so every time i've tried to play i just get beat up you know everybody's uh it's it's hard to play that game is it actually harder to be good at csgo than other like first person shooters i don't know enough they've been doing it so long csgo is basically like you know those aim training websites or something you can go do? CSGO is a video game version of that.

It's just very basic. You can apply CSGO aim ability to everything else. So I'm okay at Valorant. But it's the same thing where Valorant, the skill gap is so fucking high with all these characters that everyone else knows and I don't that I can't get into it. The trouble with CSGO, people know these lines of sights and nade spots and smoke bomb spots and molotovs and it the people are such experts that i just get scared away from even trying and i've discovered i'm not that good at games anymore like i i was never great i never pretended to be xcal but you know you can hand me the controller for a game i've never seen before

oh are you playing fucking some spongebob squarepants platformer and you can't beat this level give the controller to dad he's got this on lockdown and i'd be like here you go yeah my pleasure now i'm not that guy colin's playing fall guys over there and uh colin if you don't know is my special needs son so he's always like he says things he's like you're hard for try or for fall guys aren't you and i'm like yeah i'm hard for fall guys it means you're having a hard time with it yeah he does it's really hard to me that's funny god damn that's uh i i don't think i've tried to play that that's the one

where you're all running um yeah obstacle course it's harder than you think it's harder oh no i could look at it but there's player collision so whatever you meant to do you like you have to adjust for all these things that inputs you didn't put in there. I haven't been playing anything recently. Taylor and I kind of burnt out on Total War. All the reviews I saw on Company of Heroes 3 were bad, especially the old school Company of Heroes 2 people. They're all upset. Seems like it wasn't much of an upgrade.

I don't know. I don't have a game right now. I'm going to jump back into Warhammer 3 again. Watching hockey instead of gaming for the past couple weeks i've like found myself just the past few days lurking back over to turin's channel so i can watch and like get the updates of like what factions are good which ones aren't like it it's just it suffers from the same thing that so many awesome RTS games suffer from. And that is that it is not a popular genre at all compared to FPS. Like the number of people who want to play online multiplayer with you and total war is makes the group of age of empires.

Two players look like an army, an immaterial army. It's frustrating. Cause it's like, God, I want to be, I want to be so into this and it's so much fun.'s like all right who's in my bench that i can play with i got my boy kyle it's like okay all right and it's because you and unfortunately it's one of

those games where like you can't just jump in with people who know what they're doing or it's not going to be fun for them the same way anyone can jump into call of duty and have a bit of fun like yeah it's just it's it suffers it will never get over it because it's just a limitation of people's interest in the rts genre i think maybe i'm wrong but i think and it's a few things compounding that like it's the least popular game uh of uh and it's the least popular um mode of that game if you're going to multiplayer from campaign and then it's the it's the least popular mode of multiplayer that we enjoy playing so yeah i think for that you've got to join a subreddit um or not a subreddit discord of people who are into that i'm in two of them they never play in there they're never fucking in there i'm in two of the biggest discords for that fucking game and i'm always like i you know it shows a little screen on that discords bubble if

they're streaming in there so i'm always keeping an eye out who i'll jump in and play with these guys i'll make some new friends yeah no. I go to announcements. It's from last year or some shit. Oh. If you haven't seen this game, Finn, it is the coolest looking, aesthetically most awesome, best voice line acted.

It's unbelievable how well it's done. It's unreal how well it's done. I'm going to get you. If you don't you i'm gonna get you if you don't have time for games this is not the one to jump no it's another one of those but rts is great if it's a great one if you like that there are games that i wish had more players that i really love and there are games that i feel like i grew up and loved and they've gotten worse and i wish they were just better like they stopped making bad decisions for

the game like pub g i loved pub g and ah they keep they keep doing it dirty they keep fucking it up a little bit every every new thing they keep fucking up just slightly more and i can't even play anymore aren't there i i remember all right so i've played a lot of pub g i don't i don't know my hours are but it's over a thousand i'm sure it could be over two thousand it played a lot of PUBG. I don't know what my hours are, but it's over 1,000, I'm sure. It could be over 2,000. It's a lot. We played that. I played, if I was alone, I played solo. And on and up and up to squads.

My goal was to play with a squad, but if I got online and I wanted to play, I would run solos all night sometimes. I love PUBG. I'm okay at it. Playing eight hours a day, I was okay at it. And that's good enough for me. All right? I won a lot.

My squad was very good, as it always is. So we would win a quarter of our matches. It was fun. It was so fun. And then I got pulled away by other games and other stuff. I probably played a COD or an RPG for a few months and then played some Tarkov for a year or Rust. Something like that took me away from it. I came back to it like two years removed with my, with my duos partner. I got midi. I was like, dude, let's play some PUBG. I think he was streaming and he wanted me to play

with him. So I got in there, he dies and I'm, I'm playing as well as I can because his stream is watching me and I'm in this like peaking battle rock to rock fighting this duo and i finally kill them both because i've been playing so carefully and i run up and they were both bots they were both fucking bots but you can't you can't tell that it's a bot not it just seems like a weird bad player yeah but a weird bad player can still one tap you with a car 98 so he just wasted so much of my goddamn time was infuriating there's so many bots in the multiplayer i can't stand that yeah there was a they did do one cool thing i always sort of thought i mean pub g is based on like daisy right that's like the engine

or something it used that was like its thing and um i really like that idea as a game i wish it had like a pve thing and then they announced they've used all these bots that they've used. They've got all these bot game modes. Hey, you want to practice PUBG? You can go into a lobby of just bots, which actually sounds kind of cool to me. So you'd be able to go like offline play and you'd be able to just play an infinite amount of rounds and you'd be able to just fuck with bots and then get into a real game. However, it's they made it. So it's still you still need to be

online for some fucking reason and then you also can only play three games a day and then when it crashes that counts as one of the games because pubg crashes all the fucking time how would there be a limit to me the game limit i don't know i this is what i mean i love pubg they keep making shitty choices they had a huge uh amount of concurrent players at one point over a million maybe like it was it was something wild um and they just blew it they couldn't keep up and all the the big uh the big uh games like cod and battlefield came in and took their chunks and fortnite obviously took a huge chunk because it's just, I never did it for me. I didn't like the building, but man,

they innovate constantly. It seems like, and they stay current and relevant. I thought my notebook was good. It was basically just pub G, but fortnight style. So it's all right. But the new topic,

did you see Tyson Fury is, has beef with Joe Rogan now? How is he the boxer Tyson? Yeah you see Tyson Fury has beef with Joe Rogan now? How? For what? Is he the boxer, Tyson Fury? Yeah, so Tyson Fury, I think, is still the current heavyweight champion of the world. Oh, he's the huge guy. He's ginormous. Okay.

Yeah. 6'9"? Is that what you just said? That's the number I also have in my head. He's a gigantic boxer. How tall is Jon Jones? 6'5"? 6'4"? 6'6"? Much smaller than that guy. Joe Rogan said that if those two

were in a room together, that Jon Jones would win. But I think he might have said that he would fucking kill him. So, Tyson Fury replies, and I have the quote in front of me. I heard Joe Rogan say something about me, and I've been off the social medias and didn't reply to that little pussy, little fucking

midget, bald-headed midget. I heard him say that John Jones could fuck me up if we were in the room together. I don't think so. Not a man born from a mother could fuck me up in a room on our own. Nothing happens in that room. I'd be walking out. Not a fucking problem. He's wrong.

Bullshit. Well said, bullshit. That goes so hard. Holy shit. You don't like his fucking Viking energy there? I love it. I love it. Well said, but bullshit. Born from a mother. Dude, that's some very Saruman shit talk.

Whatever happens in that room, I'd be walking out. Not a fucking problem need to be genetically engineered and then they like take the helmet off my mother was a man john jones mom's a trans man nobody knew i think john jones could kill that man in a room for sure i i do think that i think joe's right um i think so too with the reach advantage over him ever they're not gonna fight john jones is gonna john jones is a black belt today like every fucking thing he's a really good wrestler he's really good at jujitsu he would choke um that

guy to death he just wouldn't let go he'd choke him to death or he'd break his arm and then pick him apart i just think that's what would happen guftison had a reach advantage and he really struggled in that fight but john jones was also in a bit of a low like emotionally and he was doing coke beforehand stuff like that night before um i'm trying to i can't think of anyone else as long as john that he fought he's typically bigger than the other guy because he mostly fought in 205 um so he'd be smaller than fury but like kyle says he just has so many tools like i i it is surprising how susceptible you are to leg kicks that how you don't see them coming when you're focused on a guy's hands and that's what would happen to fury i think or or you know the takedown if a guy who like like him wants to wants to double leg you and put you on your ass he can do it so so goddamn fast like yeah blink and it'll be over and if you don't know what

you're doing and i don't mean like because you watched a lot of ufc i mean if you didn't train this as a child like a goddamn spartan then you're not going to have the muscle memory instincts to to sprawl correctly how's uh how's' chin? I don't know anything about him other than what you guys tell me. He's never been knocked out. He's never really lost. But he hasn't fought a guy eight inches taller than him either, has he? He has not fought any giants.

Has he fought anyone that could not be beaten by any border? I'll grind his bones to make me breathe. Dude, I hope he's hyping up a fight i hope they're selling a future fight because i'd love to see it who does that guy fight who is in the weight class of that dude that's six foot nine there's other guys dude the other people look just as good anthony joshua comes to mind i think he fought him who's the is that the guy he fought twice i don't know i know from talking about him that he doesn't i don't think he's ever

lost right unless he's lost in the last since last time we talked about him i don't know if he's ever lost maybe not uh do you think that john jones could take a big hit from a guy like that like uh let's say this guy let's say he's going for a double leg and this guy you know being the best boxer on planet earth hits him in the face as he is want to do do you think that stuns him clean i'm not sure there's a anyone born from a mother can take a shot from him like that but but the question is like you know is john's head gonna be that exposed and he gets teed off on like you're suggesting deontay wilder that's that is who i was thinking of zach can you picture up a pull up a picture of deontay wilder if aliens were coming to this planet looking for the perfect specimen of a male

they might grab deontay wilder this This guy lost to Tyson Fury twice. Okay. And so we're pulling up the loser. We're pulling up this is the man that can't that's not a very good picture. This guy always looks so impressive to me. And he's a

heavyweight too, so he doesn't have to cut fat. He just doesn't have any. Yeah. Is there a weight so i i feel like any i feel like it you're kind of setting yourself up for failure like how what how good of a boxing you're right like you'd have to catch him with a nice clean hit otherwise the the mma guy is just gonna have total control of it unless it's like a situation look at that the white guy wins that fight um yeah god damn that guy should be terrorizing a village fucking 600 years ago in eastern europe the legends are born of that man

is heavyweight in boxing just this way and up or is there a limit i don't know boxing that well whatever this in the ufc it's 265 pounds in boxing boxing, I don't know if there's a super heavyweight or something heavier than heavyweight. What did they make wings? What did they say? I think they said heavyweight. Titan weight. That'd be a good name.

I guess it's like a... I don't know what the rules are, how they get those YouTube boxing things sanctioned or whatever. Do they call them bouts? Are they certified the same way a professional bout is? I don't know for sure. Also, it's Europe.

It's England, so I extra don't know. I couldn't believe he came out fucking with a microphone. Oh, we have to talk about the fight. I can't believe we haven't talked about his fight at all. Dude, I was so... When he came out there singing his own – or rapping his own walkout song, I got hyped.

I was in a Discord call with PKA fans. We were all hyped. He was a showman, and he was just exuding confidence. And, oh, people don't know, I was texting Wings before the fight that morning back and forth. I like to text because he's obviously having a big day. It's a big deal. He can choose our level of engagement and walk away.

It's not like the phone where he's like, fuck, I wish I wasn't here. But we were texting, and Wings got a lot of confidence by watching Boogie struggle with the stairs. Harley mentioned that line. You're going to feed me. You struggle with the stairs on the walk up the stairs and he was telling me like that guy couldn't get up the stairs without the handrail i've got this like he felt really good about it and he was right um the during the walkout wings rapped his own song and one he did well at it but two like i feel like if i did that if i put myself in his shoes the whole time i'd be

wondering if like what people were thinking of me and you'd see it you'd see that like lack of confidence he doesn't have that thing no he was just out there doing it he was just being a showman and uh um and he goes out there and they start the fight bo Boogie is on a stool. Boogie's on a stool, not like conserving his energy. He doesn't want to stand while he waits for the white. It's a bad look. It's such a bad look. Like, oh my gosh, this guy is like, look, anyone can get tired in a fight. Fighting is exhausting, more so than you might realize.

But to sit on a stool and it was like i standing is not that exhausting anyway do you want to watch the fight you just want to like cover it real quick it's 10 minutes good gosh we were allowed to watch the whole thing aren't we there's gonna be a highlight maybe play like highlights or clips of it i like like maybe like it would be cool if you were this would be hard but if you jumped around to the shit we're talking about. I wanted to talk about when he came out rapping. First of all, we were fucking... Hyped. Everybody was talking a little, but I was like,

He's singing! Shut up! He's singing! Shut up! I couldn't believe he was singing. Now, here's what I was impressed by. The whole night. Maybe the most impressive thing he did. Your heart's going to be racing right in that moment moment you would think if you're a normal human being maybe i i'm not sure that that that he like gave a shit at that moment his he was i wish we had a heart monitor on him

but when he comes out like he has to walk and rap Look at him. He's in his comfort zone somehow. Look at him. Look at how well he got in. Yeah. Boogie nearly tripped. he's got a big head and riding in flip yeah Boogie nearly tripped when he leaned forward he had to like run to get his legs back under his upper body to sort of catch it

like it was a center of gravity thing I had not seen the clip of him coming onto the stage doing the rapping that is so much cooler and better than I thought his entrance would look. You're right. He looked comfortable as shit. His little casual pointing. He looks in his element there.

He's playing to the crowd. He was just in his happy place somehow. I gotta see boogies now by comparison. UFC champions have bigger nerves than Wings appeared to going into that fight. Yes. What I was going to say was the combination of him being

huge, or whatever, having to walk out, rapping, and the scariness of that moment, he should have been out of breath when he got in there. So one of those things just isn't true anymore. You know what I mean? Like, I don't think he had any nerves. I think he's just, like, whatever that is in a person

that gives you nerves, and you're like, oh, what will people think? I don't think he had any nerves. I think he's just whatever that is in a person that gives you nerves. What will people think? I don't think he has that. He's out there with fucking ice in his veins. This is the heaviest combined fight in the history of boxing. That's awesome.

The clips of those wildebeests. Ariel Hawane tweeted. Ariel watched this with his kids. Ariel Hawane is the biggest MMA journalist this with his kids. Ariel Hawane is like the biggest MMA journalist in the world. Wings gets some punches on Boogie. Right about now, Boogie is surprised that this is an actual fight.

He's like, oh damn, we're punching to the face? Okay. Boogie spends a lot of the rest of the fight doing this. Oh, are they taping his pants? Oh yeah, here comes the rest of the fight. Buggy did. Oh, are they taping his pants? Oh yeah, here comes the taping the pants.

Yeah, the moon nearly rose. Yeah. I'm still pissed about this, by the way. I streamed two days ago or something like that, and someone just went, did you see the wings fight? And that's how I found out that it even happened.

Because it was in London. I would have 100% gone to this. On paper, on paper, you might think that this wasn't a fun fight to watch. But when you're there and you have the whole wardrobe malfunction, you have the announcement team having a little bit of silly fun with it, the walkouts.

And then Wings putting on a really good showing like better than i think i mean this is what i thought he'd do but i thought boogie would have something to go with it because wings was throwing these kind of combinations just this sort of one two overhand thing against um like keemers over overt flow or somebody holding mitts and that's maybe a week or two ago we saw that and I was like, oh no. Wings hits hard. Wings hits hard.

Man, this isn't going well. And Boogie's realizing that right now too. Yeah, the trouble is Boogie never earned his respect. You've got to get Wings playing a little D2. Nope. Wings was free to tee off all fight long. Yeah.

There's that clip like that gif I've seen 50 times now of like boogie, like slowly turning his face like directly back into wings glove. Have you seen that one? Just getting replayed all over. It's a bad. I don't think there was any point at that that wings was not having a blast based on it like it looks like he's having an actively good time after like the first couple seconds where it's like wait you mean i just get to t off up here

okay did boogie land zero punches i don't remember any i didn't see any in those zero so and again fight analyst kyle here called okay we saw him with no hip rotation right those arm punches i talked about the real problem it seemed like was his shoulders though he couldn't get his arms elevated enough to get to get any strikes in at all and he was shorter man by a considerable amount and man wings can throw punches and boogie can't. And in boxing, that is a real problem. One guy can punch and the other one cannot. I hate to disparage a man's courage because it hits so deep,

but what boogie was doing in there, turning his head, looking the other way, getting hit in the back, just, you know, just putting, well, yeah, his head looking the other way getting hit in the back just you know just putting well yeah that's what he needed was to take punches to the nose keep his hands up and return fire what he did

is just put his hand away look the other way hope for mercy and there was no mercy to be found in that ring i know that's that's so funny i know i've been i've been there was no but wings hadn't forgotten and he hadn't forget yeah the edits would come out of all that holy shit boogie wasn't engaged facing the music and returning fire he was just looking the other direction and putting up the weakest defense you possibly could. Well, he'd had no training. I mean, like, Boogie getting... That's an interesting action shot.

Boogie getting into the ring at all is great. That dude is... Boogie isn't retarded. He knew he was going to get fucked up. If he didn't know... If he didn't know that, then he's being silly. He knew he was going to get fucked up. Like if he didn't know, like if he didn't know that, then like he's being silly.

Like he knew he was going to get messed up. He thought it was like there anyway, 20 to one or so. So like just to, just to go and do a boxing match shirtless in front of this many people. Like, yeah, that's brave of you.

That takes balls. Yep. Uh, especially knowing that it's very likely that you're going to get fed. Like that absolutely takes balls maybe that's why he did maybe he thought there was food in there i'm gonna feed you oh i know it wasn't a good showing by boogie but um it's like i told him when he was on here if you finish you should count that as a win if you don't go down you should count that as a win

because you're dealing with a much younger much and i don't mean healthy as sort of in like a like a like oh i don't know you don't look very healthy i mean like a man with far fewer serious medical issues than him a healthier younger like fitter man who's bigger i don't know if i said that considerably bigger and i don't mean like taller. Taller and more muscular. I think he's later though. He's like 12 years younger. It's a big difference. Yeah, I mean, I'm not saying it went well for Boogie,

but at least he finished. You know, he got his check. I saw he did a reaction video, I think. Boogie did. And so like that means he's in high spirits about the whole thing. I say big ups to Wings. Big ups to Boogie. Both of them for doing it.

Very impressive. None of us were quick to say like, oh, yeah, this is going to happen. We all thought, oh, it's going to back up. No, they fucking proved a lot of people wrong, got their asses in the ring, and fought. That was, you know, with how much fun Wings had, he's going to get back in the mix, you think? Yeah, he's heavier, but he's just taller and broader. think yeah he's heavier but but like he's he i just he's just taller and broader and like he's you know like uh wings looks like a boxer here and boogie looks like he's one of those like dove body commercials yeah like it's it's a body acceptance dove commercial and there's

gonna be a a pregnant black lady next to him with stretch marks and uh and like an indian lady who's got a huge ass but no boobs. I'll fight Wings and or Boogie. That would be good. You could swap this scale out. Don't agree to that. Why? Wings is going to piece you up. He knows what he's doing.

He weighs... He's about 5'10", 5'9". He's the same height. You think he could beat up Wings of Redemption? he's about 5'10", 5'9"? he's the same height, you know I got equal chance, I reckon you think he could beat up Wings of Redemption? no I don't think I've got enough mass in my arm to throw

you know he's on T as well is he? I think he's been on T for over a year that's the other thing I don't know if we talk about his schedule like every two weeks, I don't know if it's the same here's what Boogie should do he should cry out asterisk asterisk fucking fucking show pictures of wings holding the bottle of testosterone and the syringes up because he's done that before

you know he's explained how his how his thing works i don't know if he's still on it but i know he he was on it and that's not supposed to supposed to be something you just hop off of i know that um body fat lowers your t right i don't know where like in the spectrum of that but i bet both of them have really suppressed t yeah yeah it's also not anymore though because wings should have like super physiological he look i'm not a doctor you know i i use dr darren for a lot of stuff. I just thought like when he, and maybe he changed his regimen, but when he described it before, it seemed like he was taking maybe a lot,

but too infrequently or something like that. And that's not even like someone's opinion. It's just that Esther has a half life and he's going well beyond it. So he's getting these, you know, low T then high T in the middle and then low T. And he's just up and down throughout the course of, it was like a couple of weeks,

three weeks, maybe even, but you know, not a doctor. Like if you would imagine it would give you mood swings. I know if you were a woman and your estrogen was doing that or whatever, I bet, or whatever that hormone is that,

that makes you, uh, you, that makes you gals the way you are. That's a really funny like... I know I like in conversation both as a joke but then occasionally accidentally Taylor and

I have messed up and been like yeah she'll be here in a minute or where she at and it's like fuck I bet I would hold a door for that dude i was on a i was on a show with uh i was doing this kiff uh popular streamer has this game show thing it's like a basically family feud but like on twitch so they poll chat and they whatever but like in the group chat setting up for it it was supposed to be originally like um But in the group chat setting up for it,

it was supposed to be originally like OnlyFansGirls versus FanslyGirls, which is the other site that does that. And then it turned into Blondes versus Brunettes. And he completely forgot that I was not... In the chat, he was like, Damn, dude, we need eight girls and there's seven right now. It's like, They ended up pulling this random dude in. It's like miss like I added him and they ended up pulling this random

dude and it's like great now I got seven girls and one dude they just forgot I just left them I let them run with it have you ever done the corny ass Austin Powers that I'm a man baby I wouldn't attract anyone besides boomers

that was a really good movie in middle school man very... I wouldn't attract anyone besides boomers. That was a really good movie in middle school, man. Dude, you know what? I killed at the lunch table. That actually... That went all the way down to my feelings. Like that. Wait, what? Austin Powers? That classic film that I loved as a kid? That's boomers

now? I am very sorry. Technically, it does work. I bought it... Listen to this gigabrain strategy. I bought a Buck Knives hat specifically to appeal to older dudes because that's who

buy OnlyFans. I bought a hat that's like Buck Knives since whenever the fuck it was and god damn did that work. I don't like that's like buck knives since whenever the fuck it was. And God damn, did that work? Oh my God. You need like a, I don't like that. You're putting them down.

Yes. Classics. What about camo? Would you get some older guys with, if you started wearing camo stuff? I did. I wore a, uh,

maybe that could be kind of cool. I will. I think you should do. I think you should, you could do really well if you did, um, like femme boy. Um, you're not that, but you should. You could do really well if you did like Femboy. You're not that. But you know what I mean?

Like, like, what's he doing? What do you like? Airsoft guns. He's a fraud right now. He's making a mockery of the vagina and all of its keepers. He's the Al Jolson of women. He's the equivalent of Michael Scott going full black face and wig you know we haven't spoken like in 2023 have we i don't think i'm not sure i'm not fucking with you i've had two controversies and they that was genuinely

an argument against me which was i i will quote a very funny feminist which said i was doing woman face that's my beautiful your account woman face yeah it's diane feinstein but fine is spelt fine yes she's not she's not 103 and not like actively do you have you seen the videos of like them pushing diane feinstein down the halls of she's like actively turning to dust as she's moving down the hall i don't know if what they say is true because i'm reading that right wing news um she legitimately didn't know she wasn't there for months that she took this leave of absence she looks terrible but zach get us a photo of diane feinstein in that wheelchair I saw another one like

side by side with Emperor Palpatine and they like made her quote like whatever he said about being scarred by his battle with the Jedi I am disfigured from my battle with the Jedi but it's her face oh now look.

That one's a little far away. And they haven't photoshopped any Star Wars elements. Her left eye doesn't open. It doesn't? No, she's like, that's usually a sign of a stroke.

By the way, this is what a boomer looks like, you asshole. I bet she's like silent generation, not even boomer. I was going to say, you're a decade off of Max, dude. You're so wrong. She remembers Hitler as like an up and down. No, my father's a boomer. Did you forget? Here's the story.

The soldiers came back from World War ii and they all had kids and that giant like baby boom that happened from all of these people having children at the same time created a population expansion that put a strain on the entire infrastructure it was like really hard to get into college all the schools where like the teacher to student ratios got fouled up stuff like that like so zach has this 20 year range where they're boomers he wrote 46 to 64 they've divided that they kind of say 46 to like 52 or something or the real boomers the people who were in the first couple years from the return of the world war ii soldiers they've stretched that to like the 70s that's not world

war ii so i'm the child of a boomer. My dad is a boomer. I don't think you get how I'm using the term boomer. It's anyone older than me. You're misusing it. Anyone older than me is a boomer. What do you get how I'm using the term literally as figuratively? Dude, you guys are not getting this right now. It's pretty boomery.

You guys aren't wanting words to mean things? Very elitist suddenly people born in racism it's racist yeah racist suddenly it's yeah someone born in the late 80s is a boomer because they remember life like without camera phones oh yeah i'm still shocked every time someone says like i remember when invented computers. We had a big one in school. You don't know anybody who knows when they invented computers. How did grandma? I'll say that the most boomer thing about me

that it's one of those things that on paper sounds awful. I learned how to type on a typewriter. We had typewriters in my school. I will say this, you learn a lot faster because when you fuck up on a typewriter, there ain't no delete.

No, you got to rip the paper out. There was this age of typewriters where they had an LCD screen and you just type the sentence out and then the computer, I guess, would just like after you said go, I'm happy with this. It would type it all out. Yeah.

It was. I hated it this is this is not gonna line up sliver of technology that that stems the gap between the the electronic typewriter which is what i learned on you know the oh you might picture a typewriter where you're mechanically fucking driving hammers or something it ain't that shit i'm not a gumshoe detective or anything secretary um but it's it was like it was a big fucking machine and it had a very pleasant sound when you hit a fucking key chunk chunk and when you got on a roll if you could type you know 80 words per minute it's fun it's kind of cool and a whole room full of them i like you know i'm a typewriter what happens to anyone who's had some level of success is they

think it's all theirs like oh yeah I got to where I am you know because uh my own hard work and gumption and bootstrap bootstraps like that yeah yeah so listen to my privileged upbringing yeah I would write out my book reports in like fourth grade and my father who had a secretary who typed like 130 words per minute would just like like put it up, type it all out for me. And then I'd hand it in at school. You lucky bastard. I remember like being in fourth, fifth grade and them telling us like this book report has to be typed. And I remember just like, OK, it's going to take me three to six minutes to write it.

And then typing, I guess I'll probably be done by tomorrow morning maybe and like i would like mess up and i didn't i remember fucking up and accidentally hitting insert and not knowing why i couldn't like backspace normally anymore and be like i don't know what to do and so i just like deleted everything and like restarted again i remember like sixth grade like this lines up with not with Woody, maybe with Kyle a bit. Like I remember being given a floppy disk to like save work on in like sixth grade and having a feeling in my head of like, this is like,

whoa, they're trusting me with something. Like it's just a little floppy disk, but in my head it was like, this is how they like, this is how you do things as an adult. Hang on know what a floppy disk is i know what it looks like no not a floppy icon yeah floppy disk it's a little square thing it's got a little metal slider to yeah it's like it looks like the it looks exactly like the save icon that's what

they modeled it off right yeah exactly that yeah when you hold one it feels nice it does when you pop it into a machine the machine the machine is sort of spring-loaded you're pushing a thing and then all of a sudden it clicks back into place and it goes in it's really cool tactile feel but those things are like eight megabytes if i remember correctly 1.54 maybe 1.45 megabytes the moon not a lot i don't know i had the number eight in my head but but i i was playing uh video games using them in the computer lab of our poor ass school and um and you you had you'd go to the fucking they were in like a cart all these cartridges were in like a thing like a like a toolbox and you pick your goddamn 8-bit game

a thing, like a toolbox, and you pick your goddamn 8-bit game. Maybe that's why I'm thinking 8. 1.44 is what it was. Yeah, okay. Maybe I'm thinking 8-bit game, then. I just remember that I kind of missed that. Alright, here's what would be cool. Do you remember, like, in Taking Them Out, with that button that, like, would go,

and then it... It felt like a secret agent, like, securing the folders and the data or some shit. It's like a swordfish. I almost wish I had a, a drive like that, but it was really, I don't have, I don't have information to move around anyway.

We used floppy disks when I was in college. Like they were still a thing when I was going to school and, people would like trade them like, Oh, do you need this? Here's a, here's a disc with this like group project or whatever. The thing is they were a buck a disc,

which is like nowadays saying maybe five bucks. And people would just give them to each other like they didn't cost anything. But not me. I'm broke, broke, broke. I'm living in a low-income housing unit with a violent drug dealer underneath me. I can't just give away fucking $5 like it's free.

This is a half a meal. But I guess I did social pressure i found out that apparently there's a 500 gigabyte um floppy disk that is available nice i nice that's where the sex tape's going because how cool is that you write across the floppy disk no one will steal that shit or know how to use it it'll be they wouldn't know how to get it out in vhs man vhs you can like write it in big letters so you can read it, right? That I did grow up with. I did have VHS. Really? I'm surprised.

Okay, Boomer. You were poor, huh? Oh my god. VHS was normal up to the mid-2000s. Yeah. What do you mean by that? Like 2005? Like 2003, 2004? Yeah. I have memories of them, so it must have been

at least 2005, 2006. I think you're stretching it. I feel like DVDs were that time. I think DVDs were coming into the... I remember them being very expensive in 2000, 2001, and then you know how tech does. There was some point where it went from

thousands of dollars or $1,000 to $800 and then $500. I just remember when Walmart finally introduced that $20 DVD player. It was like the size of a DVD box. It was so little, this piece of shit, and everybody bought one. But that meant you could get a decent one for $50 or $80 or something, so that's what we did. Or maybe I had the PlayStation or something. I remember this the playstation was a cheaper dvd player than a dvd player was that's

what i did and like that because they're like loss leaders or maybe they sell them at cost whereas the people making dvd players were trying to make a profit so why not get a playstation it did it too yeah didn't sony own and invent the blu-ray and and and own that and so they were licensing it out to everyone else but then so then they were free to just throw a blu-ray player into their playstation maybe i'm mixing up dvd with blu-ray on this story oh maybe i am too um i'm a little stoned uh i i think it's blu-ray though i think i think sony owns blu-ray because i remember that was the that was the second generation of competition between HD DVD

and Blu-ray, right? Wasn't that a thing? Yes, I remember that, too. There were people with collections of HD DVDs. Yeah. Right next to their fucking... What was the other? The VHS? LaserDisc. Betamax.

My family standardized on Bet beta max because it was better and uh but as the years went by the selection just dwindled and dwindled and we had to switch i remember like being frustrated by how many of like my lion king and um jungle book cassette tapes not cassette tapes my vhs tapes like my little brother would like tear the stuff out of oh and like i remember thinking like there has like why do they make it where anyone can just destroy it like just it takes half of one like and then it's never gonna go back you can't roll it back in there it's all folded and fucked up it's not gonna play it won't even play right i remember like having to wait weeks at one point for a new copy of jungle

book and like being pissed. Like you son of a bitch. Like I, you know that while mom is doing her disco workout, I like to dance to blue. Like, you know, that's my day.

You know, that's what gets me up in the morning. Like completely unreal it uh yeah yeah enough that like i came back in from outside and it was just laying there with like half the movie pulled out of it and it's like we both like the jungle book like wasn't that i want to be like oh yeah yeah I played that nonstop. I can't imagine that was a fun thing to be around. Cause that's all I listened to. It was just blue. Um,

were there Disney movies that you guys just saw as a kid and hated, uh, 101 Dalmatians. I hated 101 Dalmatians. She was, she was so mean. Yeah. Old lady.

You hated the character. Yeah. I hated the character though. You were supposed to hate the character, though. You are supposed to, but it also didn't have the excitement in the songs of Jungle Book. Jungle Book's the best one, I think. I like

the OG stuff. For some reason we had a copy of Bedknobs and Broomsticks. That one's old as fuck. Bedknobs and Broomsticks is the story of a witch who has become so via correspondence which means you're writing in via mail to somewhere and taking a class that way they mail you the materials and the instructions you learn that way it used to be a way it's like the the phoenix online uh of the old uh of uh you know the 40s. And so this guy was a ripoff, right?

He just found some old book and he's been mailing spells to her. Well, it turns out they fucking work. She's become an actual witch. And because London is being bombed, it's the Blitz, all the children are being moved out to the countryside. And she has to take in these three orphans who are like, I don't know, eight, 10 and 12, something like that. And they quickly realized that their host S is a fucking witch.

So they're like blackmailing her to give them better food because she eats like shit and they want like kids food and stuff. And they go into a magical world of imagination and songs. It's just wonderful. By the end, spoiler here, the Nazis invade via, I think, maybe paratrooper and the water. They invade England. The witch saves England by reanimating medieval armor and having it beat all the Nazis to death. It's a Disney movie. There's like 30 minutes of it

that are completely animated, but all the characters stay real. They just put them in an animated world and have them interact with animated characters, and they play soccer for their lives. This doesn't sound good. It's so good!

The Isle of Naboomboo or some shit like that. I like Shrek. I think Shrek had good music. I think Shrek had a good story. I think Shrek's better than any of these. There's also 70 years of technology. Shrek is solid, you're right. Jungle Book, though.

It's so good. There's some good ones. Toy Story. I really like Robin Hood I really like Robin Hood that's one I play a lot I like the song from that and Made Marian is one of the more fuckable Disney princesses even though she's a fox

and Friar Tuck she's got titties you can see fox titties under there I'm a furry ally you know what I remember from the Robin Hood movie? I remember there's a chicken character with huge tits. You picked

that out, not me. Don't judge me because you're wearing fox ears, weirdo. Suddenly I'm the oh my god, he likes foxes. Look at me, I'm a fox. he's the weird one you're the fox lady you two are they cat you get cat and bunny and those are the only two cute ones you're allowed there's like rules what okay well dog girl would be weird in my opinion

so yeah it would so for some reason the cat ears are like just the ears on a chick are hot um i've also always said that uh arwen i like i like live tyler but only in the lord of the rings movies only i don't think he's only with the fucking ears and shit and that vaseline filter they throw on the camera um she looks like she's in a fairy land all the time i'll time all like out of focus and hot yeah um they have to do that so you don't realize that vigo mortensen's way too hot for her but if you step right over i know what a dream but but when you step right over to like full furry and i'm picturing like picturing like a sexy blue pony person it's like way too far

but somewhere in the middle there's a middle ground right and i'm wondering where is that middle ground between oh look at that chick she's got cat ears on fucking i know it meow right what is it i've got i've got it i've got a good opinion on this i don't think you can debate this it's whenever it causes you an inconvenience so like pause too far the weird furry slipper things too far butt plug with a tail i would deem almost acceptable i think that's that would be on the okay line of things because then it's a separate reason just not like going to get an mri something no we'll talk about don't forget that topic i've got that written down yeah you're referencing the event right that happened not just making a joke right oh you don't know what happened i do not all right so does everyone

know what a rail gun is yeah you know all right so in theory explain it the nazis are using electromagnets to accelerate a projectile down a barrel so the same way that uh you've used magnets before and they repel one another. They're doing that over and over in sequence, timed perfectly by like a fly by wire system so that you accelerate these objects really, uh, fast and, uh,

without any propellant. A man went in for an MRI with a butt plug in recently, and he became a human rail gun because now his complaint and he noted this in his lawsuit because yes he survived was that that butt plug said 100 silicone but in the core was a steel uh item there you know it's a steel core like uh i guess for weight or you know rigidness and so the mri being the mri being the most powerful magnet any of us will ever come into contact with unless we work at cern or something and are accelerating protons um it accelerated that fucking um fucking butt plug

all the way up to like here. And I'm slapping my hand on the middle of my chest sort of area. It's like up in his shit so goddamn far. And of course, he was there in my ride, so they got a good image of it. Ah.

Why would they not put you through a metal adventure before? Did you eat a butt plug right just now? No? Well, then we have an issue. They just asked? Oh, my God. They go on your word? They put you in the world's biggest magnet without...

Just like, hey, did you have any metal on you? And if you can't remember, you just take your life? I think they ask you about tattoos. Is there iron in a tattoo or something? Hang on, guys. I'm seeing so many things here. So what this is, is I think a standard x-ray or something they did after the event. This is the, oh, my God, let's figure out what's happened to him.

Look down at where his asshole is. They have inserted a thing and inflated it to, to staunch the bleeding and create a new asshole for him because his old one is gone. That is that, that, that, that like gray area.

That's perfect. Zach. Yeah. That's the, the gray bulbous thing right above his pelvis. That is, that's something they have inserted into him and then inflated for the purposes of sealing his butt.

Because look how wide the back part of that butt plug is. The part that you kind of grab with a couple fingers. Oh my God. Yeah, that ripped through him. So he no longer has an asshole. And I think if you look at the plug itself, there are two round spheres in it. Those are metal. So this guy wasn't even close in his guess.

It looks like it's mostly metal. It's mostly metal. That's a really big butt plug. Yeah. Let me stick an artillery shell, dude. Nah. That's normal. I'm not on that level yet, Woody.

That's the training phase of the steps. You know how it is. The confidence to wear that in your asshole in an MRI right he wanted or oh of course he wanted it in his ass but it's like come come on man now you got it way in your it could also be this went way better than he ever thought he might have also wanted the the novelty of having an mri of himself with that thing in his butt and thought that was going to be cool to have like uh but i mean and look he turned out turned out he was right he has an incredible uh series of scans here but his he's never going to shit right that's i don't know it's like a like. He's going to get a colostomy bag for sure.

Dollars of donuts. He's getting a colostomy bag. Oh, I hope not. I cannot believe this person's alive. Oh, I know so. Are you sure this person's alive? You sure? Surely.

They wouldn't have put that much work in after. I'm not 100% sure, but my recollection is that he was filing suit. I'm not sure if he was suing the mri operator or the the butt plug company but i think it might have been the butt plug because it says 100 silicon on the outside but they mean on the outside it's it's so that you know that oh god yeah that's exactly it yeah so is this like you know amazon listing it showed that there's ball bearings in it and to be fair like now that i'm looking it's possible that even though it showed up on the scan, look in a certain way that the grabby part in the back was semi flexible. But I still stand by that.

They had something stuck in his butt there to keep it from bleeding out or falling out. I wonder if it happened. Oh, don't don't circle that one, Zach. No, no. Did it happen instantly or did it like escalate? Was it like instantly? I bet it was instant. Yeah, it's so fast.

How big is two inches? Tyler? I'm trying to imagine it. You can just do it with your fingers. About the size of your thumb? Okay. No, that means... Oh, that's diameter. Doesn't that mean two inches in diameter, right?

Two inches in diameter is the thickness from edge to edge. And it's... How much is a soda can? That's always a good... Like a 12-ounce soda can is a good one to go by. What's a soda can? What do you think, three something?

This is definitely bigger than two. I call it two and three quarters. Well, then that was a serious ass plug. Yeah. Fuck. Oh. Oh. What do you say?

Three inches? Taylor, how wide is a soda can in the middle? What did you say? I said two and three quarters. I'm going to say two and five eighths. It's three exactly. Oh, I'm sorry. I cut you off.

I'm sorry, I cut you off. I'm sorry, Finster. I was going to say smaller than two. Is it two inches, Zach? Oh, he's already proofread. The can is exactly three. I don't know what Zach has there, but I googled it. It's just like a...

Either way, yeah, this is a helpful picture with the penny. Oh, it's learning what two inches is. I understand understand although he would also have needed to handle the penny before oh yeah that's a funny thing using american currency as the uh oh yeah that's what's interesting about sending on a message to aliens is like oh yeah we're this not that and they're like what the fuck are those two things i have a friend that the whenever they visited the uk they i didn't realize they were doing this but they were making up currency in america i knew what a quarter was i didn't know and i know what a cent was and they just kept making up gibberish words and they're like this is whatever

15 cents is and it was just nonsense words and i believed them for way too long. This is a quickle. It's like it wasn't of like that. It's a gimbal. It's a time. In olden times we had much cooler currency. I'm sorry.

I stepped on you twice. There you go. No, I was going to say I definitely clocked on as soon as they said something like, oh, this is a floob, you know? I go, oh, no, it's my show. $2 bills real. Remember that? It was different in the olden times, Kyle.

All right, so obviously it's a huge amount of time, but I'm thinking of American currency. Those Wild West style banknotes, the banknotes from the 1850s to 1900s or so were big you had like a almost like a half a sheet of notebook paper like like like like this big stack of of money and then they had different denominations i i really like the golden coins which at the time i assume no i know like like whatever whatever whatever that weight of coin was was the value of gold that it was. So a $20 gold piece

represented that gold right now is worth $20 for this fucking much. So whether I'm handing it to you at the mercantile store or whatever for pay or I'm... Or you're melting it down and handing it to the gold smelter.

You're going to come out with the same value either way. So they had tons of different denominations of coins of silver and gold back then that meant what they were. And like, do you know why they added those lines like the ridged texturing to the outside of coins like in the Roman Empire? Because they didn't they didn't used to have that on the edge and what people would do is they would clip coins and so they'd get a coin of gold and they'd clip the edges off and be like, hey, I'll pay you for this

and they don't know, you were clipping the coins and so they started adding textures so you could tell, hey, this coin's been clipped this is not what it's actually worth, it weighs less than this now that was probably a really, you can also feel, you can also tell by feel if you're blind,

you know, really easily what's going on. Dimes to pennies, a cert, certainly with the ridges. But yeah, I remember watching a whole thing about how people would, when they find the old coins from Roman coins,

I think a lot, they'll be clipped, but it's sort of like, like, like they would nail livestock's ears will be clipped sometimes this little triangle cut out of them um but yeah they're just taking a little chunk of silver out of the out of the fucking dinar or whatever that thing's called yeah the dinar uh before we get on to the next thing we're gonna hear from a couple of wonderful wonderful

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If you decide to go for the cartridges, that's a nice, gentler way to do it. Whether Delta 8 is going to be weaker, HHC is going to be stronger. Ifc is going to be stronger if you're intimidated yes if you're intimidated at all start with delta 8 vapes if you think you know i want to try a stronger vape try hhc uh for the gummies themselves don't fuck with them if you don't have a high tolerance start very very slow and this is good advice because you're going to get a lot more bang for your buck anyway because like 100 milligram milligram gummy is going to last you like multiple multiple sessions so don't overdo it and and scare yourself start slow um i would don't don't even start with half like yeah start with don't take a bunch of them and brew it into a weird tea certainly don't do that no that'll and then concentrate that tea in like

an old timey coffee pot you know the one with a burner and the little cup with a filter. Don't concentrate it in there in a hotel room all alone. Because that would lead to a really scary evening. Don't do it! You have to trust me. They're a really big deal. I took a half a death by gummies

the other day. Can you get a hangover from weed the next morning yeah you can feel fucked yeah you can wake up feeling this ain't even weed i slept till 10 30 until 10 30 a.m so yeah uh start slow with the gummies uh that syrup fucked me up so like start real slow with the syrup don't be like what... What? Start real slow with the... Syrup's too much for me. I quit with the syrup. Jesus Christ, you guys aren't me. What would the syrup do to me?

I literally... One of the first times they sent me the syrup, I had been taking the gummies, and so I didn't measure it out. This was many, many months ago. I drank probably a third of it, just thinking I'll be fine. A third, maybe even closer to half.

You need to listen to our ads, Taylor. Well, I thought my tolerance was high enough at that time. And it wasn't. Like 30 minutes later, I'm like vibrating on the couch. It was too much. Start very slow with the syrup if you get that. I think the gummies are the best thing to have. The gummies are my favorite by far.

Gummy edibles are great. I'm all about the HHC vapes. Every time they send me a baggie of them, I'm like, it's as close to a childhood Christmas morning as I'm ever getting again, as far as happiness. And, and,

and it's just, it makes my whole fucking week when I, when I go out there and there's just this surprise little package with a whole shitload of those vapes and stickers. You know, I just throw those right away, guys. As many vapes as you can get in that bag. Stickers be damned. All jokes aside, I got so many fucking. I've been putting them on my neighbor's car.

Help spread the word. He's covered up over there. He's covered up. I truly I've never understood how you can be high and entertaining because it always seems like a way better idea the thought of being high and on camera sounds great sounds hilarious good content but i i can't i just stopped being a sweat claim man it depends what being high means to you right so when would we like i don't i'm intoxicated right now but i'm not stoned that might not make sense like like like it's the difference between being buzzed and drunk um i'm definitely impaired i shouldn't be operating any fucking machinery you wouldn't want me shooting a watermelon off your head you wouldn't want me uh making any like

maybe decisions about the life insurance policy maybe we'll keep those till later but you know i'm fine but if i got stoned i wouldn't be verbal i i wouldn't be verbal i i would be i would be staring off for long periods of time i might drool a little i think i just wouldn't enjoy it i feel like i so i did like a i hadn't ever had an edible before and I tried it on stream And it must have been like five million like not a lot But enough like I don't know being a little bit high just makes you you're exactly yourself, but slower in every way So it's just not good to be it's great feeling hot. I can't entertaining people

Oh, yeah, everybody differently the edibles thing is what would be scary now? I would never take an edible and come do this uh that i wouldn't fuck i wouldn't do that not a lot no i wouldn't even do that because when i take an edible what did finster ask you're putting it all up like a small dose or something like that i those edibles are a real deal that lasts for a long period of time. I'd honestly, if I need to, I can be sober in an hour and I can drive somewhere in an emergency. Like if I cut my foot, but if I take a bunch of edibles,

what am I going to, now I got to bother somebody else. Somebody else has got to take me. You know, it becomes a whole thing. Or what if someone needs me? What if I got to go help? It's great that we'd never pay for an ambulance.

That shit's ridiculous. Oh, wouldn't even consider it. And maybe it should be because can you imagine how many more ambulances they would need if they made them free because everybody would see people would be calling the ambulance to get a ride like by the hospital yeah you know what i'm feeling better i'm actually hey that's my that's where my buddy lives they'd hop out of the ambulance and go on their way. Drop me off at Buffalo Wild Wings. I'm feeling better.

They evaluate you on the phone, I think, like over here anyway. Like, they'll make sure the problem's serious. We have, by the way, I don't know if there's something. Help me, I'm hurt. Bullshit. Genuinely. Hey, I got a cut on my foot. It's bleeding heavily.

Are they like, drive yourself? So, listen, here's the state of things if you drive for a while you will see billboards paid for by the government that is someone like i can't describe okay like a band-aid on their finger and they're looking at the camera like that and it's just big text to say like essentially don't be a pussy like don't come to the hospital if you've just got a fucking cut on your thing deal with it yourself you're taking up the resources bro like big advertisements like that so it's an issue but like the only time i've ever i remember when uh when i was playing baseball and i got hurt they just have an ambulance there i think that was the deal i think they have one there in case anyone gets hurt because they schedule the ball game so there's multiple fields there's like five ball

games going on at once there's a lot of kids running around someone always gets hurt but that's the only time i've ever gotten oxygen out of one of those things and i remember thinking like this is just cold air what the fuck are we doing let's let's go to the hospital why aren't you giving me this cold air i had no idea what the purpose of that goddamn oxygen was when i had a broken foot exactly you gotta find one of those funny little like I'm on about. The stupid guy. The little bandage on his head. How much

are ambulances in America? Here's a guess. Let's do the guess thing. I don't know. I want to go first. I have nothing to base it on. I'm going to say the average in the United States is $5,000. Huh? based it on i'm gonna say the average in the united states is five thousand dollars

hi that's the what it's just like an uber but with like that was my exact guess so i'm gonna you can do it to me go ahead hey i'll take five thousand one i'll go fuck i'm not gonna win that all right i'll go three thousand four thousand all right i'm i'm i was dude my guess was in the hundreds but what the fuck because it's i get the whole like medical personnel but it's like five minutes oh twelve hundred that's lower than expected yeah that's more that that's you know how much uber x cost? Yeah, this is a good deal. Wait, to where? Okay, is the issue partly that everything is so fucking far away?

No, it would be less than 12 minutes, I would expect the drive to be. It's that in America, you get screwed. They screw you. Everything medical is very expensive. I thought it was way more. That's a lot of money if you just like banged your banged your arm and didn't know

what they cost and you're like wait a minute you're charging me this for my arm and this for the trip there it'd be awful but i thought it was like almost prohibitively expensive like limp your way there like fucking crawl your way there. You're going to double your bill. Is it called Medivac? What's the helicopter called? That can be really expensive. That sounds about right. Your buddy got Medivac, right? You know how much that costs. I don't know what he paid.

Probably a shit ton. I think we said somewhere between $25 and $50 for those. But I bet it can get crazy if they got to do some wild shit. I would want them to spare no fucking expense if I was on a mountain or something, though. You know what I mean? All right. Sorry, I interrupted.

40 to 50 grand. Yeah. Ooh. And remember, guys, this episode is also brought to you by Lock and Load, which I forgot to mention. Call PKA or Code Giz for 10% off anything over at Derek's wonderful site listed below.

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That's the best way to package it. So Code PKA, Code Jizz, 10% off. like a rail come yes one thing i have to repackage it so code pka code jizz 10 off anything you want on his site his weight loss supplements his better sleep supplements his protein powders pre-workouts nitric stim no stim fantastic i like that i like the dream uh the dream stuff i don't know if he has it in stock it's almost always out but it legitimately i found that it legitimately gave me some funkier dreams that seemed more uh real i guess when i was there more vivid dreams more lucid dreams uh as well uh i liked that and it's like full of stuff you can tell it'd be like 1 000 milligrams of it's all sorts of made-up gobbledygook I've never heard of. But I promise you, it helped me sleep and have some weird dreams, which I enjoy.

You ever have lucid dreams where you can take over and be fucking Thanos? Is that right? You choose to be Thanos? Well, Thanos-like abilities, basically. Omnipower. If you're in charge, is that a bad guy you'd go to? If I was going to pretend to be a bad guy

in a dream, I think living out some sort of Al Capone thing might be kind of fun. Like being a gangster, that kind of shit. I meant, I didn't mean creating a new fantasy world, like a holodeck. I meant, now I am God. This is my virtual reality world.

Become water! Like, now there's fish inside of you, water man! Haha, how does it feel? There's fish inside you, water man. How does it feel to be breathed? I mean, okay, well then that's good. I haven't had a real good lucid

dream in a while. That's one of the things I would do to my enemies. I would make them be the water in Woody's fish tank. And every time Jackie came to laze the enemies, it would burn. Make them into the water? That's what I would do to that goddamn guy who knocked on my door trying to sell shingles to a house I rent today. It was like waking me the fuck up. You got solicited for shingles for the

house you're renting yeah yeah i have a no solicitation sign yeah i have a no solicitation sign yeah more that which is a long ass driveway they don't ignore that yeah that's true that's true you had one at your last place it was pretty pretty long. It was not only long, it was a little creepy. It had a turn in it, I think. It did. I would tell people who were coming there for the first time, especially if it was a girl, like, let me meet you at the mailbox. My driveway looks like

something out of a horror movie. You drive along a dirt road and then dead end. You're like, wait, what happens? No, no, no. Look directly to your right. You missed it. There's a different colored road now that goes up into these trees and uh yeah it would be sketchy as fuck i i've invited people over and they would just keep driving straight into nothing and then be out looking around and i'm like looking out my window like shit

it's gonna scare the fuck out of them when i explore the sex it was great baby no one can hear you screaming oh my god yeah yeah it was sketchy it was sketchy um i liked it though it was pretty private you know i could that hot tub in the backyard it was it was nice to have like a private area back there and then that's where we did the wings boot camp all the way back there in that like back field area which i think was yeah on that too um i had to tear all that shit down i'm so white trash i had left a little bit of it up right up until it was time to move out um and uh i filled uh yeah i had to throw all that shit in the dumpster they were like what what did you have going on out there i lied and told them that i had uh dogs that did um i was oh that's the obstacles for my dogs yeah

yeah i didn't want to go into the whole story. It was going to be hard to explain. You know, the whole solicitation thing? I kind of like them at this point. The only people that really knock on your door are people who want to sell you different windows. But occasionally, I get a great one, which is someone preaching whatever religion it was. Which means I get to answer the door like this and not say anything while they talk to me about religion and they say ah cool bro and they have like oh you're the problem

i love that shit they're great still yeah right they realize they've been doing nothing inside them that's got to be off-putting like like i think another thing that uh maybe you could do uh like a religious themed photo shoot right like you do like a nun thing that would annoy a lot of people oh no no you got to go to church though and like get whoever your photographer is to like get me dead here's what i want here's what i want here's what i want i want you coming out of a confessional booth, giving like a wink. Like you just, like you had a lot to confess. I think you'd be good at this, man. This whole management of only. Oh, that would be so funny.

That would be so. I mean, I wouldn't want to be associated with it. I'm just saying you should do it. I don't want that smoke. Leave the Catholics alone. They've been doing it for a long time like i recently learned that my area of england i've been everyone every i keep saying like i want to move to texas that's if i can get to america that's where i want to be because taxes

but like if i can get there that's that's the plan and everyone in my chat always says something like you want to move to texas you are you fucking kidding me and then i will google i'll go off googling the stats technically i live in a more religious area than, like, Texas on average, and it's certainly more than Austin, you know? Oh, yeah, I was just about to say, somewhere like Austin is like a funky little liberal town. Nobody's going to hate-cry me there.

Only, like, 20-something percent of the people here are not religious. It's, like, an absolute giant majority, which means my Uber rating is down. I looked this up the other day because I thought that I was in this vast minority of the unbaptized, but apparently modern children in the United States are only baptized at 25% to 32%, something like that. I don't know. I have a rough memory with the stats but it was low and and i wonder maybe i should have googled would you baptize your kids fuck no i'm not baptized what i'm gonna wash them in some magic water yeah all my kids are baptized hey man look

i'm not judging you or your lifestyle but you you asked me if I'm going to baptize my children. And when it comes to my imaginary family. Yes. They're very important to you. I don't believe in imaginary all-powerful beings that don't seem to ever do anything any more than the next guy. But I don't know. It's kind of like a family party in celebration of the new baby. We kicked off each of their college accounts with it. Would you do the same festivities?

No water, though. And hey, leave Father Jimmy hands at home. We're going to have... Yeah, let's actually do this at Pizza Hut. That would work just as well. Or a nice restaurant. You know what I do like to believe about myself? I'm not sure it's true.

Because you're talking about a young man, typically. If that priest was mean to my baby... Ever see him slap the kid because you're talking about a young man typically if that priest like was mean to my baby ever see him like slap the kid because they're crying i hope i would be that dad that's like how do you like it fucking give that old rinkley ass dunk him slap him like just do what he did to that infant and be like what do you think now huh you dish it out now you're against a guy who's bigger than stronger than you i'm gonna let's dance motherfucker take that box of fucking wafers he's got crush them all up how you like that i hope i mess with that guy you always see the dad they're like oh man what should i do here he's a priest everyone respects him and

here he is hitting my child i hope i'd be the guy that's like yeah that's a real what the fuck do you think you're doing kind of moment so yeah that that baby's gonna get fucked it's gonna be sad and not in life later on and not know why it's gonna be scared and maybe you'll be fine but but that guy's job is to spritz my baby and to speak latin anything beyond that is uh is not gonna work out too well like i've seen him be violent with those kids to a yeah it's like dude you could snap some kid's fucking neck if you jerk him the wrong way don't do that i'm 100 gonna be the type parent that needs the advice like don't shake the baby i i couldn't be a parent for a while because i would get so frustrated

don't worry about it yeah they can shake him a little when they're bigger like two or three we had this inflatable thing it was like a bouncy castle but small enough to fit in your living room and and uh it also had like cages on the side and a roof we called it the dome of terror hope loved it i would be in there and it'd be like you ready to dance and i would just take her and slam her against the walls and the inflatable floor. And I do this thing with kids, right? Like jiggle them and they giggle, giggle, giggle. They love it.

And that was the dome of the ring of terror. I do that to my dogs. You like against the walls. No, I think you called it. What do you got the jiggles or something? Sure. Like I'll put my hands on my dogs. I kind of pin him down and go like really give give him that i call it giving him the trembles and uh and

when i do it i got like he's doing making that noise it's a real good time i teach kids to go uh and then i hit their chest uh it's a it's a huge crowd pleaser yeah oh man you're a good but you're a good parent dude At least you're having fun. What about me? I told you I was cool with the dog. Oh, yeah. You're a good dog. I don't get some like... I don't hit any strays there at all. I hate it.

My dog's toenails are too long. You're nice. You can't brag about your dogs now. She hates... This is not one up at all. She hates no no you this is not uh one up at all she hates it when you clip her toenails can't stand it so we like keep the clippers on the coffee table and i'm like a ninja in there i just get one i see i like i i eyeball it from a little distance when she doesn't know that i'm scoping her out and be like all right that's my target

toenail i walk up i clip it The whole operation takes like one second. She's like, how dare you? I was like, yeah, too late now. I got 19 more. You're a good dog. I like you. You're doing great. My neighbor's the fucking worst.

He moved out and abandoned his two goddamn dogs. It's like a 10 year old dog and like a three year old dog and they're fighting all the fucking time where the little ones the young ones beating the shit out of the other one he left them over there and it was like 90 degrees with no water and no food um but i guess um enough of us neighbors called uh and complained that uh the guy's parents who actually owned the house forcibly made him come back and take care of the dogs to some extent. So that's good

I guess for now. It's just a piece of shit. It's real sad. They're over there all fucking panting and there's flies on them and shit. All those poor pups. Yeah. That's ridiculous. Oh, and then like animal control. No you going to take revenge on their behalf?

No, no vengeance will be on my hands. Coward. I told you, I've already got beef with that big lady. How many felonies do you have so far? Two.

Those are rookie numbers, Kyle. You gotta pump those numbers up. Those are the convictions. The beef you have with that big lady, it seems like she just wants beef. Because it doesn't seem to be your fault. That's how she got big. Here's how I know that she's just a real piece of shit.

When I first moved here, one of my dogs got out and ran across the street into the neighbor's yard i immediately went over grabbed him took him back inside but as i was doing it a random gentleman was walking his dog down the sidewalk and i was apologizing to him for perhaps spooking him with my unleashed dog and he was like oh i don't care but the queen bee lives right there better watch her don't let her catch you slipping and that's when i knew we had like a homeowner association fucking bad bitch

in the neighborhood the queen and that's that's what it is um it's a she gets up every morning at 6 a.m i know because i'm often up at that hour taking my dogs out and goes to work every day. And then she comes home and fucking worries about me and my dogs. She's already reported me to animal control at least once. She's fucking ridiculous. And then one time my groceries got delivered to her stoop instead of mine. And she said, tell your delivery drivers not to use my driveway to turn around in i have a crack in my driveway and i pull in in a special way not to put pressure on that crack and they're

just right back and right in using my driveway to turn around and i was like i'm i'm not going to be able to communicate that to the drivers they really struggle ma'am they already got the food at the wrong address and you're wanting them to have special back out instructions like i don't think this is gonna vibe and she's just all okay then fine that's how it's gonna be so now i'm like trying to rig up one of those water balloon launchers from the 80s and shoot like roundup filled water balloons over my house into her yard like medieval times. Round up. Yeah, like kill her whole yard.

But then I remembered I'm a goddamn adult. And so I just. So you're going to TP your house. No, I turned the other cheek. God damn it. Just let it go. Decide that I will be the adult and and I'll just let her influence slide, and not be a piece of shit, and not

shoot water balloons into her yard like a child, which is what I would have done when I was 20. That's what you would have done at 20, is launch a raid into their yard. I had beef with this one guy, and I went in the dead of night. He couldn't get two actors. On both sides of that.

That's stupid. But yeah, I've killed someone's yard before.'ve sprayed it with a roundup and gotten it took weeks for it to start dying at first we were like damn it nothing happened damn it grass is tough and then like it started dying it you know a penis would have been brilliant it really would have but we were just trying to cover as much surface area as possible. He deserved it. He had been outright mean. Rude. Rude was the word. On the Unethical Life Pro Tips subreddit, they're all about clever

revenge there. It's really the theme of the subreddit. How to damage people. Some of it's rough, like fucking with people's cars in ways where it's hard to catch you. Have you seen the revenge subreddits? The nuclear revenge.

Have you seen those scales? It's like professional revenge and petty revenge. Petty revenge. Petty revenge is fun. I like the ones where someone they've been stealing the guy's breakfast burrito for a month so he fills it up with habaneros.

That's revenge, god damn it. You don't have to report someone to the feds. I photoshopped him into January 6th and I'm reporting him to the FBI. You saw my burrito, so I planted crack on him. I'm not kidding. That exists.

Like, okay, so the scales of this, the petty revenge is the habaneros in your fucking burrito that someone's stealing. Or, like, slightly making someone look bad at work. And then it goes pro-revenge, which is the natural step up to that that they created, which is, like, you know, killing someone's whole lawn, you know? Yeah. Then there's a few after that ending in like nuclear revenge where it's literally like this guy stole my burrito at work i killed his wife like that sort of level of shit it's insane none of them are justified if you go on there you'll see some insane shit you know one of my favorites was a guy kept stealing a woman's um milk and like that she used for coffee or cream

or whatever so she replaced it with breast milk and then told him afterwards. Some guys get really creeped out by that. Who the fuck got enough free upgrade, dude? For whatever reason, so cow's milk.

I love cow's milk. Cashew milk is what I've found to be the best milk substitute for the, for the calories. It's expensive as shit though. Uh, when you start adding it up, I didn't really,

for some reason I thought those were gallon containers I was buying. They're like, like $14 a gallon for that shit. Jesus Christ. It's like rocket fuel. Yeah. Apparently so. Might as well just go ahead and get macadamia milk.

But it's, um, um, the idea of goat's milk or even human's milk is kind of a big turnoff. I'm watching Barry, and there's a scene where one of the characters is sort of hiding out in Chechnya on a goat farm. And he pours his off-brand Chechen cereal in his bowl, realizes there's no milk. And he goes out and straight up milks a goat and then goes back in and just eats that warm goat milk cereal hot milk for your cereal hot goat milk right off the teat i bet it's better than dry cereal i bet it is too but i don't know goat milk's kind of got that twang to it that sort of goat cheese is in in

the world of cheese it's not a winner like it's it's all cheese is good cheese for the most part i'm a real cheese connoisseur i've i can point out on it to a map where the closest charcuterie places are i am a connoisseur my favorite i'm a connoisseur. My favorite dining... I'm a connoisseur as well. You point to anything, I'll tell you if it's cheese. That's how I can tell. That's cheese. What are your favorite cheeses? Orange.

There was a place in Brighton, which is the only good city in England. It's just very calm. It's a bit like if you were going to port over like california vibe of people you know they're kind of chill they're kind of hippies nothing's like a high rise you know it's just a nice place there's lots of like locally owned coffee shops and shit and there's a there's a cheese place there's a chocolate it's like you get you spend like 30 pounds you can have a like a medieval fucking dining experience like a a whole you know like what one of those shots on a king's table where the knights are

reading shit like that and it was great it was run by one french guy and he knew everything about everything that's right like it was empty the whole place was like filled with grandma furniture but it was so comfy i love that place i've never gone back because i think it would like ruin the first experience i had of it i'd love it was a board restaurant and just yeah i guess like a tapas restaurant just like picket stuff and be like oh i'm not overeating even though i'm just picking at things for hours calories of cheese i've been i've been watching this youtuber um i mentioned him before he does all sorts of eating stuff or food related stuff but it's it's often it's really interesting stuff he's been on rogan before but he was um he was in i

don't know singapore thailand somewhere like that and he went to the cheapest buffet in the city and the most expensive buffet in the city the cheapest one was a dollar and you had heaps of meats and like noodles and shit it was so much shit but it was a lot of low-grade meats it was like oh look at that oh look at that oh that's the eyeball still in there look at that that's a good fish head there's like all sorts of fish uh based stews and some fresh sort of like pastes of meat uh that i wasn't quite familiar with but then when he got to the one that was 80 us dollar roos, holy fucking shit.

It rivaled anything I'd ever seen in Vegas, like those expensive ones in Vegas at Chacho. There was so much lobster and crab and oysters and just everything. I've never been to a nice buffet. My buffet experience is pretty much Golden Corral. Next time you go to Vegas, that's the that one of it's my favorite part of vegas because i don't like prostitutes in-person gambling bright lights places that don't have fucking clocks um and uh i'm not a fan of the place for you or i also don't like cocaine or fucking meth guys desert folk you don't you don't like in-person gambling,

but online gambling is cool. It's a strange one. I love in-person gambling, but something about the Vegas experience is so awful. I would much rather be in kind of a private game or a semi-private game, like a quiet poker room somewhere. The experience there,

it's just constant drone of voices, unless you're playing late nights, I guess. But it's just... And it's a big table. I don't love it. I don't love it. You're in rooms full of other people. Your poker table, when you get up, there's a guy behind you whose chair

is back. You're like, oh, let me bump this guy right fucking behind me. Maybe that was the poker room I went to, and it was just a big one. But I just don't like Vegas in general. But buffets are amazing. They're incredible. I'd love to go to the buffets. Zach, show us some images of the Las Vegas' best buffets.

Yes. See if you can find a top 50. And then we can go through all of them. Narrowing it really down, huh? Mm-hmm. We have time for the top 125. We have time for the top 125. We have the top 125. Yeah,

that's what we need. If I went to Vegas, I would, like, other than, I have no interest in gambling. It's just not that, it's not something I'm interested in.

Yeah. Live shows and eating is about all the rest of it. And I bet there's probably somewhere fun you can go and like rent dune buggies and drive all around. Ooh. So the problem with doing that,

every time I've ever rented something like that because of insurance and safety it's such a neutered experience that you almost wish you hadn't done it i went on a toured snowmobiling tour once and on their website they told us how many horsepower these fucking things had you know what i mean so i was getting hyped i was like give me the fucking big boy let's go i want to get some air and then they led us along like you ever see kids on a on like a horseback adventure and you're all in a line and the instructor's like over here there's a hill coming up so everyone down shift and go to whatever quadra mode and it was we waited until the group we let we let the group leave us basically uh to catch up to them so that we could haul ass and hit the hills and stuff and actually ride for fucking 30 seconds at a time occasionally it was so maybe there's ones that

don't do you like that but i bet with the dune buggy thing, you'd be in a similar experience. Because when I think of renting dune buggies, I think of like getting air and like landing hard and swerving around in the desert. I'd want it to be fun, not, you know, a guide. Oh, like zip lining. Oh, go nice and slow. I like zip lining. You've defended zip lining and you've made it sound more fun than i ripped on it basically just saying what the south park guys made fun of it yeah yeah that's you know everything

the south park guy said was true except i'm not afraid of heights in particular but i don't like them either especially if i'm not secured and i was scared to go on a couple of them and i was scared the first time i rappelled backwards off of a surface into no man's land like we're all standing on a platform me and woody and all the boys and they're like all right jump backwards off this platform you're 40 feet up go and you're you know you're rappelling you're catching yourself but it's a weird step to take if you've never done that before so there were scary moments of that. So that was kind of thrilling and fun. And then that place we were at in particular, it was in North Carolina or where Tennessee and North Carolina and Georgia do some weird shit.

I think it was like a quarter mile long or something, 400 feet off the ground. We were like over this huge chasm and it had started raining as we were going so the first people you could hear the the noise that the pulley makes on the cable and it gets quieter as they get away from you and you see them get caught on the far far end of this fucking canyon we're traversing but the rain kept making the cable wetter and wetter and the guy was like oh you boys are gonna whoever wants to go fastest you can go last i didn't hear him say that so you're just like your lips are and i think maybe either woody didn't hear it or like he didn't realize that he could have shifted behind me or maybe

he thought i really wanted to go fast and i certainly wasn't gonna ask to go slow so i and dude the guy the first guy had said it went when i got on that bitch it went it was so fucking wet uh that was scary that was legitimately scary and i did panic at one point earlier in the day and almost stuck my fucking hand into the pulleys which would have eaten all my fingers off. And it's embarrassing because... I would have ruined your whole day. It would have ruined my life. It's so embarrassing because I own a zip line.

I have one. At that time, it was fully operational and I was using it all the time. I wouldn't even put on the safety harness. I would just run like a fucking... It's TV and grab onto the thing and hang on to it. As I like went down the thing. Uh, and then like getting a zip line,

uh, there's a company that'll come out and like two dudes in a truck and they'll throw up like one pull after another for you or one zip after another for you. You could make like the best, like chart, you know, the slides coming out the house sort of thing, like a zip line to the back of the garden thing from the second floor.

That'd be cool. Yeah, I had it so that you could take 20 steps out of my dad's yard and climb up a little tower and then zip all the way down to the bottom of the hill. You get pretty fast, but nothing like what I'm talking about, that place that Woody and I went. That was fun, I thought, though. And also, like I said before, the real cool part is there's a lot of camaraderie. We made friends with those people.

Woody's a really friendly guy in real life. He's always talking to people. He's trying to friend cash register operators and cashiers. They prefer cash register operator. They do. But we were buddies with all the people that were in our little squad by the time that day was over. It was a good time. That's how it is skiing. You like make friends with someone on the lift.

Because like if you've never skied before, like you can either go in like quads or doubles. And like usually like a lift will carry like four people. And so if you're in a group of four, you'd be in all four. Or if it's like you two other people and then you and someone else, you get matched with two other people. And then there's the singles line, which is the fastest moving line. It's the best way to ski. Don't wait in line at skiing to ride the lift up with your friends. Just everybody get in the singles line.

You get to ski a lot more. But the people who are in the singles line are like the people who want to talk to you about snowboarding so badly they they're not they don't dabble in snowboarding they love they live for snowboarding they live for skiing and so like in in the world of people who show up at a mountain to ski i'm very good at skiing of people who like don't know like what they're doing like I know how to skate and so I can go down all the way up to black diamonds and everything pretty competently these guys like sometimes you get off a lift and you can see like oh there's a giant carved out area to the left where everyone has gotten off the lift and gone to the left because that's the

easier runs the normal runs and then there's a curve to the right where you can like still see individual paths through powder. And that's where like these guys go to like, it's called a back bowl. And so like, it's not even a real run. I remember once I went to like the top of one to look like a double black death diamond.

And I looked down and I was like, what, where, where do you put your feet like where what do you do because it's like you would be falling at times like to the next like and it really eye opens like oh i thought i was like serviceable at this i'm not even like i would i could die if i tried to go on this route that this guy's going down right now it's it's impressive like the the reaction time like a really good skier snowboarder has how fast they are responding

to the moguls it's a really fun activity and i think you would love it kyle if you just lock those ankles in place we get we get some nice big strong ski boots lock those ankles in place you'd have a blast you'd be the thing be there's really no way to practice and and see if it's going to be a trip wasted right we're gonna might skiing woody and my and my bitch made ankles um uh i think i think that snowboarding might be the answer if i could wear a good pair of like socks and like you know boots just outdoorsy boots and then get buckled into that thing i don't think that would put all that it would be pinching my goddamn ankle yeah but i i'm also fully fully aware i could not snowboard see you can't go nearly as quick on a snowboard as skis

so you'd want to do skis i think everyone has a over the top a bill like in their head they can ski Because they're like me I you skied once when I was 12 and now I can ski permanently. I'm a good skier I can't I know I can't but in my head again. I know I can't you can see Yeah, I can barely ice skate I got a fucking scar right there because I've Tried to ice skate and bust busted my lip like so bad that they like had to clear the ring because they needed to clear the blood you know when i was a kid that sounds awful you ruined everybody else's time yeah yeah for like a good 10 minutes they had to bring the little machine great if if. If I'm on the ice by myself,

I won't fall down. That won't happen. And I can go anywhere I want to go. But if I had to navigate around people and occasionally slow down or make really any sort of sudden turns, it would go very poorly. And I would end up having to just drop and

land on my ass rather than run someone over. That's what would happen. Yeah. Well, you would want to land on my ass rather than run someone over. That's what would happen. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you would want to fall on your ass if you could. Oh, last time I skated or the first time I skated, really, I remember my ass being more bruised than in my life. Like my ass was just so bruised and sore that i couldn't i could barely sit down it takes like one serious fall on ice to like really wake yourself up again and be like oh yeah like like this is

really unpleasant it's so fucking hard and cold it's so cold it's seriously hard right it feels hard to make a concrete it's hard to explain it somehow is it's like you just bounce off of it and you're not allowed to like you're not allowed to act like it did hurt i gotta like pop back up because there's kids around and shit my buddy yeah my buddy's my like a couple years older than me he's teaching me he's lithuanian so he grew up playing fucking hockey with with some so it's just just use your ankles kyle and he's, Kyle! And he just feeds away. Oh, of course. He was like...

I'm holding in so many fucking jokes. The whole like, oh yeah, your ass really hurts. Sometimes it's like, you gotta bounce off it. Dude, I was... I try to grin and bear it and not let him know that it hurts.

Right. Do you ever get to the spot where you almost feel naked without a stick in your hands skating? Yeah. Yeah. It was definitely weird. I think I went years without skating where the only time I was on the ice, I was wearing all my goalie equipment. And then I went out and skated and i wore regular player skates and it's a if you don't know about hockey like this will sound like cope goalies use a different blade

on the bottom of their skate it's longer and it's got like edges that's because as a goalie you're pushing laterally you're not pushing back in a stride to try and move forward you know quickly in almost a running you know stride you're pushing hard laterally stride to try and move forward quickly in almost a running stride. You're pushing hard laterally. You're moving back and forth across your skates. Are goalie skates sharp? I thought they were kind of dull. Some people like them dull.

I liked them pretty sharp usually. And basically, you move laterally. And so you have different strides. So you push down and back like this with goalie skates. You'd pick down and back like this with player skates. And so back like this with goalie skates you'd pick down and back like this with player skates and so like they don't rent goalie skates and so i was like with people when i was like probably 17 18 and we were going skating and i didn't have my goalie skates and so i looked like like not a good skater at all out there and i'm like guys like i'm like constantly

like missing my toe pick because i'm not these aren't the kind of skates i use please don't judge me like i you know i know how to play hockey you've all been to my games like please like i played goalie at another school but the problem is if you wear your goalie skates without any other equipment they're enormous they're like big hard plastic on the outside clown shoes looking thing and you're skating like this with no equipment on you look like a fucking goober as a goalie skating without it but yeah you do feel naked without the equipment it's colder you forget how cold it is out there your pads on man is uh i know that england has

a professional hockey league where like the people who can't hack it in the lowest leagues in north america go there and it's it's such a low league that paul bissonette biz nasty he was an enforcer in the nhl only had like 200 games in his career all his jokes were about he had like hands of stone like he just fought and shit like that and he went like end of his career he couldn't even make the ahl the nhl's minor league he like pops over and like starts playing in the england hockey league extraordinaire whatever and like you look at his stats and it's like oh my god this dude that like would get like got mocked out of the minor league basically into a media position can just dominate in England.

And he's like, it's great. The fans, they don't understand the game. They really don't get it, but they're wasted having a great time. They're trash. Dude, you think people get drunk here? They get fucking trashed in England. The more you talk about hockey, the more I figure out what hockey is they get trashed

they get fucking hammered I guess European fans of sports love getting shithoused we drink so much differently how much does the average Englishman drink a year how much alcohol does I want that stat.

All the time. It's a fancy little bottle of liquor there, huh? It's some one-cent-me whiskey. I drink dog shit whiskey. Why not? Good point. It came in a big thing. I have been starting to grow boobs

ever since I started drinking it, though. You see, an amateur would check the cork for tampering. I'm drilling a hole right through the glass down at the bottom. I'm replacing it with a quartz crystalline. Wood at the top, I'm okay. But there's like a...

When we went to, again, we went to Tokyo. Oh yeah, fun fact about Japan. Okay, wild guess. Please. Oh, yeah. Fun fact about Japan. What's... Okay. Well, guess. Please. What is the most popular drug in the world?

Recreational drug. I'll make it easier. What's the most popular? This is an easy one. Hot. Weed? Okay. Exactly.

What is it in Japan? Alcohol. Heroin. Anyone else? Oh. Cocaine. Oh. Are they smoking that fancy opium from the western movies?

That looks fun. I wonder what do Japanese people like? Probably not. It is meth. Their most popular drug in Japan is meth. Doesn't meth make you skinny? They are skinny people. And they're productive aroo. No wonder they're getting so much shit done.

This is Cheaters. It's such an interesting place. But the only... We were at a restaurant or this sit-down diner. This room, this private room with a chef that does the thing. And they'll take your order. And he just about spoke English. Enough to say when I ordered a double whiskey shot.

A double whiskey soda thing. And everyone else ordered Coca-Cola. And I said, the double. He went, British. double whiskey soda thing and everyone else ordered coca-cola and i said the double he went british and but that guy was pretty great again didn't speak a ton of english but enough to insult specifically me specifically drinking do the british drink more than like the french or italians or germ i imagine germ Germans really pounding down beer. Who do we think drinks the most?

Because I'm going to go with a Korea. I was going to say, because I've heard that about you too. But I made up the game because I know the answers. So. God damn it. Everybody guess, Korea.

This game will be, what is Kyle's favorite food? He's running the table on us tonight. Dominating. God, ever since we agreed to put money on Kyle-based trivia, I've been losing my mind. Especially the subjective point hour. What is Kyle's current

favorite? Fuck, I hate these. I never get these right. What number is Kyle thinking of? It's always close. It's always like, no, not four. What number am I thinking of? Seven.

I was going to say seven. Seven is usually what I guess when someone says guess a one to ten number. I was picturing seven. It feels the most random. Wow, I was pretty good at this game. I was the first one to come up with seven. Wait, name a number. Three.

Those are both numbers. Everyone's a winner. I don't like that game. I don't like that game i don't like that game it's stupid it wasn't educational at all yeah korea definitely i've heard they drink the most it's hard liquor too that they drink a lot of more than you think right like sake oh yeah sake is good or what is the korean one that's awful tastes terrible the k Korean one that's awful? Tastes terrible? The Korean liquor. Have you tried soju? Soju. That's what it's called. Soju's good!

You're fucking with me. It tastes like juice, but it's like 20-something percent alcohol. It's good. Maybe I've only had bad stuff. I've only tried one kind that I got from the grocery store a couple years ago. It is only half as strong as vodka.

And it has every bit of unpleasantness, at least. And I tried and it's like known to be one of those ones that's like it's too. It doesn't taste much like you might add a bad one. I don't know what it was, but it was one of those ones where you need to be careful of how much you're drinking of it because you don't quite realize how much you're drinking. I mean, it doesn't impact me. I an ally i only drink bud light so i'll be honest whenever i hear someone say that about alcohol i'm like yeah you won't even realize how much you've drank it's like dude i pretty pretty good track of much water i drink like yeah i can't keep up with this special elixir that comes out of a bottle with a cork in it it's someone's vodka into this Fanta, I'd be like,

I put vodka in my Fanta. I wouldn't know immediately. So you're right. When they're like, oh, you can't even tell this hard alcohol. It's so smooth. It's like, no, you have an acquired taste. The same way you're not lying to me that you think it's smooth. The same way the cigar guy isn't lying to me when he's like,

this is a good one. I don't know enough about the cigar thing to shit on it but i i know i'll never enjoy the taste of alcohol the taste of alcohol itself i hate it now what i do like is is getting like like slamming a few so that i've got that buzz and now they taste pretty good i'll say this i i've drank some strong-ass fucking drinks if I'm buzzed. And to me, it's like, I can't taste caramel and vanilla at the same time. Fuck yeah. Is that leather?

Hell yeah. Maker's mark, baby. But I hate having to go to that place to begin with. I just so much rather get stoned. Man, it's just... Someone was asking about a drinking episode today, and I was like, man, please don't make me do that. All right, I will do a drinking episode if...

Here's my if. It's just a friendly have a few drinks sort of thing, but it could have no drinking games because I take the drinking game seriously, and for whatever reason, like I do every goddamn game. We couldn't play Twister here without me calling a rules violation. I promise you. I'm a fucking asshole.

Oh, my dick, Woody. Yeah. Woody bit me! It was part of the game. Those were both the same incidents. I didn't see nothing. Like, it was just a little bit. You could totally have a drinking 43 minutes, you know? I don't see nothing. It was just a little money. You could totally have a drinking 43 minutes.

I don't have any alcohol. You probably don't. Let's talk about... What I will say is if we just have a few casual drinks on an episode, I'll do that. I don't want to promise blackout the last one we did.

I don't remember that show like i blacked out an hour or two hours of that shit legitimately and i've never blacked out in my life and that was uncomfortable because because i was like what did i say they were like you went on a rant about elena and her husband and him being crippled and her leaving. I was like, all right, well, I stand by all that, but did I say anything? It was awful. Were people laughing? Was it funny?

Kind of. I was more laughing at you because you were belligerent. Well, you had Taylor laughing. He was loving it, but he was tanked also. Taylor is my muse. He's the only reason I do this. I can never get a laugh out of him. It's really rare that I get to that really happy place, a nice buzz, where everyone's having a good time, and then stop there, or maybe just maintain that.

No, I either zoom right past it or fail to achieve it. It's difficult. How long are you out pot partying or doing whatever you're doing when you're drinking okay so let me quickly inform you that taylor is a bit of a casual drinker occasionally he'll have a beer every now and then woody and i don't drink and what we mean by that is we have no reason to possess some we would never possess some casually uh alcohol we would never order a drink with our dinner we would never do that if we are in a social situation where everyone else starts doing it to fit in and to be

friendly i will drink a good bit woody will begrudgingly have one or two but he'll probably have none yeah i might get none too you might yeah i mean our drinking uh most of woody's recent drinking experience and i mean that in the last five years, has been on drinking episodes on this show. Wow. It's not a good habit to pick up. I mean like a drinking day

would be like some kind of activity. There we go. So these are different shows. I can't see why people want one though. I can't see why people want one, though. I started... If I remember correctly,

I went through an entire fifth of vodka, which is a fifth of a gallon. And then I think, again, I blacked out quite a bit of this, but there was a second bottle. I know I came back with a second fucking... And I think there's... Oh, here's the funny part.

In my glasses there's a reflection of Elena's nipple titties. Her big pepperoni nipple titties. That's how good my monitor was. That was that Asus Predator, the fucking ultra-wide. That shit was $1,500. You can still see her huge

pepperoni nipples in the reflection of my glasses. Look, I'm just saying... you can still see her huge pepperoni nipples in the reflection of my glasses. They're lovely. She's pregnant. Look, I'm just saying. I think they're lovely, too. We all love a giant inflamed pepperoni nipple, Woody. We all love that, and we understand that it's natural, and that turns us on.

Motherhood's hot, all right? I'm not shaming anybody. But those were two different episodes, and the one on the right, that's one of Taylor before Taylor was a host here he was a guest and that that was the night that he melted down on Lefty

my fucking internet went out my internet was out on the night of the Wings 1v1 and on the night of the fucking of the Lefty meltdown damn you 0 for 2 on that you had bad luck I always had shitty fucking internet on the night of the fucking of this lefty thing. The lefty meltdown. You had bad luck.

I always had shitty fucking internet. I love the modern times. I remember that. How weird it was to have a friend who was into the same shit we were, like uploading videos and being like, oh yeah, I'll see if Kyle wants to play this. Oh no, that's totally prohibitive. Like he's not able to play because his ping is uh 260 and so he's getting shot before the gun sound make his

long time ago but it was hilarious how wings would just kick people out of the strangers strangers you know he'd be like you know boy toy 69 leave the game leave the game you got host and you're terrible leave the game and you just like bully strangers into leaving games taking l's because he wasn't enjoying their ping i don't blame him for that um you know he was he was getting he was he wasn't there playing for fun you know he's trying to get a commentary right he's not there to conversate yeah i mean you it depends what kind of videos you were making i don't know if i did a lot of team bait stuff i don't really remember what kind of card videos i think but but his stuff was often

team-based him playing domination and getting a bunch of kills so kind of makes sense to want to kick those people out yeah makes sense he's playing for his job it's his livelihood he needs those good those epic scores what what's when did monetization come into youtube because i always i hear mixed opinions on when it was like easier or harder to be a youtuber and i don't know if that was during that time where you could do like cod gaming modern warfare too that's your date like you track dates via video games around because i'm remembering the video that different youtubers made at the time i can picture them talking about um how they needed to hygiene how you needed to pop over and watch their commentaries on machinima now because we were going to be sending them like our best videos

and having them upload them over there that was the beginning of monetization for us and that was a few months into modern warfare 2 i believe i believe. I want to say during Modern Warfare 2, we went from like, it was only monetized on Machinima's channel to it was monetized on our own as well. That happened, yes. It makes sense why there were a bunch of like, I guess the whole, whenever I hear about that era

of YouTube with wings and everything, and all the drama that came from it, it sort of makes sense. Because no one had a grasp on it yet, I guess. That's why it's a bit more toxic, I guess. No one had a what? Like a grasp on it. Because everyone started to make money, and so naturally

no one really knew exactly how it would work in the future. I get why that created a strange environment or one that Wings would kick off about losing a fucking 1v1. Oh, that wasn't sure that's not on the line though there was a lot on the line like you have a short lifespan typically as a youtuber and back then you made like good money but not retirement money you know

yeah but i guess like now it'd be way harder to break in and make something i feel like like the huge guys are like mr beast yeah he's so well it seems like he's kind of transcended the platform even like yeah it seems like he already has with the kind of like views he gets if you just go to buy his channel and just look at his video catalog it's like every single one of them is like 100 million if not close it's ridiculous and what is that compared to like if you're just taking

like apples to apples views what on earth compares to that like other than some of those YouTube accounts that like have like that are in India that have a quadrillion and not saying it's like about your heart.

He's like these big YouTubers, not just him like they are driving totally different thoughts and processes about like the future of media like 1.2 billion in the last day. If you aggregate Fox, CNN, 40 million a day and msnbc and add all of

their shows together and quadruple it they don't sniff they don't sniff mr beast on a day like they are it's unbelievable the reach he has compared to traditional media like he if there was a war of if there was a war between all, every host on Fox, every host on CNN, every host on MSNBC versus Mr. Beast's Twitter, just Twitter,

just his YouTube and Twitter. He wins that handily. It's not close. He has more online engagement. He has a younger audience by every metric. He's like, he slays them. It's really cool to watch that.

These big multi, By every metric, he slays them. It's really cool to watch these big, multi-billion dollar institutions get blown out by a guy like him. They don't take that much to blow them out. Like a million views blows them out. I was looking at Fox News because I thought they'd be the most popular one. 200 million views a month. With like a YouTube short also interesting i didn't maybe it makes sense with tucker carlson but they lost 200 000 subscribers this month

yes that's that's part of the whole thing you know okay have you been following the whole christian mr beast coming out thing no is that completely not for you i've only heard of it i've seen some of his videos, but I don't keep up with MrBeast. I've never seen a video. You've never watched a MrBeast video? He makes good videos. Maybe not the demographic, but they're alright.

Very solid. His fucking girlfriend follows me on Twitter. I can't talk bad or I'm going to get a hit squad after me. It's like the MrBeast squad. What were you going to say about Chris? A big thing that happened recently was chris which is like the main second person like the fucking you know been in mr beast video since they started it right um they uh they came out as trans or they came out they said that they were taking hrt for the last couple months and i fucking kicked mr beast and his girlfriend's ass in this video game dude I dominated that fucker I am sorry get on it

there was yes we means means soda which is my friend with the blonde hair that looks like they're fucking jacked into the matrix they're really concentrated kick their own but yeah um chris you could probably find the the chris tweet but essentially someone had said oh yeah so chris is on the left there in the pink in the pink yeah okay and so they're like the the main crew the talent and everything and uh they recently came out as trans or they came out as being on hrt they're going by any pronouns currently i've been just trying to use she, her, because they're clearly going for feminine.

But like, and I've met them. We're relatively good friends. But people lost their shit because obviously the Mr. Beast brand is so fucking massive. And all the conservative views are like, they're going to infect our children's minds.

But like, you know, this infect our children's minds. This was sort of the biggest thing that happened recently because, again, the giant reach this guy has. It's nuts. People are very pissed. It's a big debate. Whenever I hear about him, I hear that he's healing blind people

and the lame. I don't know why he hasn't grown out some jesus hair and just fully embraced being a fucking messiah because all i hear about is and then people give him shit about it that's what i've seen on reddit like yeah he'll heal he'll heal a bunch of crippled children who would have never been healed otherwise and they'll be like he monetized it though didn't he what a bunch of fucking losers right you get mad at that what cunts what absolute cunts to see like a little kid like get his sight back and be like he's doing this for

attention it's like whoa you've cracked the code dude a guy making videos is doing it for attention like fuck off it makes me a little worried about chris like i that must be hard to have that many people disapprove of you online like i i feel like i've had a little worried about Chris. That must be hard to have that many people disapprove of you online. I feel like I've had a little fraction of that. And there have been times when I struggled with it, especially, whatever, eight years ago. But he has a whole other level and he's younger. You're talking like that guy, Mr. Beast, right? He's got all these views and everything.

Chris has like 10 million on TikTok and he just posts like videos of him hanging out with a kid, you know? Like they're just vibing, you know? 10 million followers. So he's like got his own huge accounts. Sure. Like extremely, extremely popular.

She's great. And then like, you know, it's rough, but that's sort of why like they took the Japanapan trip right like they wanted to sort of just fucking leave it for a while like be off social media is that what you're saying the meth and fed yeah we all did meth together obviously they made six videos what do you call it when you're doing meth because like i bet there's some sort of like inside speak like yeah we're fucking we're fucking popping some meth off.

You know what I mean? You want to get jangle jangled? Yeah. You want to get juked up? I can get juked. That sounds real, doesn't it? Getting juked up? Yeah.

I'm going to get cranked. I'm going to get cranked. That's good. That's what you do when you're on that is you you take meth and then you crank your dick for 15 hours and it still doesn't come and it doesn't come yeah can you imagine that like being like so excited that you got your meth and you're gonna do your meth and like this time i'm not this time i'm not jacking off for nine hours and then it's like fuck i jacked off for nine hours damn what a great drug is that what meth is i think so it i always heard it helped people be

more productive but that seems helps you be a real dick all day what's the difference between like coke i imagine is the productive one and i don't know what the fuck myth. I don't know. I know it's in a functional method in media. I've only seen cocaine users be functional. Microdotting shrooms is like, I thought that's what the cool productive people do. Those are like Silicon Valley productive. There's no like blue collar guys fucking doing mushrooms on the like blank bricks and shit. It's going to be like people in like making tech companies.

The blue collar guys, the ones growing the fucking shrooms under their house. Growing shrooms is very difficult. You can't beg fungus to grow. You get the wrong fungus. You get the wrong fungus. Black mold.

Scrape off Taylor's walls. Woody fucked up and got smallpox. Everything's getting fuzzy. I got the plague pop oh shit that's one thing I would legitimately be scared of growing something because I always harken back to that sixth grade, I think. Yeah, sixth grade science project where we all took gelatin, you know, the basis for like jello, but it doesn't have sugar or it doesn't have coloring. It's just clear gelatin. but it doesn't have sugar or and it doesn't have coloring it's just clear gelatin and then she told us to take this piece of yarn and this little vial and go home and rub it on something in particular like this is what the brick on my house is or this is my daddy's boot and then put it in there and bring it back and you put it in there and that is a cult a cultural will grow like whatever bacteria was exposed on to that thing it'll grow and become visible because

there's it's nothing but food for that for that stuff i put mine in my dad's poultry house which is the most filthy thing you can imagine and it turned green and we had to call the whole thing off and i don't know if it was my bag that got her sick, but when she was disposing of 20 bags of God knows what kind of bacterium we had grown, literally, here's how we did it. We took the bag. That's a terrible idea. We took the bag. Why would you do that in a poultry house?

Today, kids, we're making mustard gas. Yeah, right? We took the yarn that had the yuck on it, put it in the gelatin in a Ziploc bag, and zipped the bag up, and then with duct tape, secured it to the wall of the classroom. And it sat there against the wall

so you could look right through the clear gelatin and contrast it to the white concrete block. You could see what color your yuck turned out to be. And that bitch got sick. Our teacher, she was gone. I don't, you know, as a kid, time's weird. It felt like she was gone so long that, like, maybe she's not coming back.

Like, they're being cagey. Nobody's making eye contact. Like, maybe she's not coming back. But she did eventually um she had some kind of a virus or something from your fucking bag i was reading online today this story i guess a dog peed in the house so someone put bleach on it to deal with the pee and they said that it makes some sort of noxious world war one gas is that true yeah ammonia and bleach but like there's something wrong with that dog if it's pissing an amount of how big is the dog four or five hundred pounds like it was just on because no amount of dog piss is like you dump bleach on it and it's like,

like you're in the trenches. I always thought it was like not that much because I constantly heard stories of people bleaching their toilet and then immediately pissing into it and then like feeling faint. That's because they use ammonia and bleach are both common household cleaners and a lot of over-the-counter products. It'll just say shower cleaner this toilet cleaner that if you use that foam stuff in conjunction with like some other product you'll gas yourself and die in your fucking shower probably not you'll probably just fall out gasping and wish you uh hadn't done that but um uh i i don't what was the what was

the first part of the question it was about making mustard gas out of bleach and ammonia. Oh, the piss, though. The piss. Bleach and ammonia will absolutely make the mustard gas. Yeah, but not from piss. In Minecraft. Yeah, how much was I allowed to say on YouTube? But I'll do some experiments with urine.

And I'll let you guys know Tuesday on PKN how that went. You know what? I think that'd be legal. Return of FPS Russia. Oh, yeah. Let's make some chemical agents. You know, on this episode,

we violate NATO treaties. We're not going to make any chemical agents. We make most powerful bathroom cleaner on Earth. You remember the King of the Hill where Peggy has an advice column she puts in the paper and she can't think of advice and then she like put something in there and comes back home and

hank's like what was the advice you put in peg and he's like i had a brain blast i told people to combine the cleaning power of ammonia with bleach and he's like no tomorrow peg you're telling people to make god dang mustard gas and then he has to go out and finish it what a great show it's going to be ruined when they remake it of course yeah it might make chlor for some reason chlorine is coming to mind i think it's because in world war one like i know the germans used some sort of chlorine gas mixture that they like allowed the wind to sort of fog out over the battlefield. I'm thinking of a chlorine gas, but it may be

bleachers, chlorine. Well, there you go. There you go. What's that chloroform that paints out one thing? That's not real. There's something... What? Apparently it takes a long time to knock you out.

It would take me so long to put you out with chloroform that you'd be getting bored you might hey what's the big idea friend you want to take this off me hey it burns the nostrils three more minutes of this and i might get sleepy like i'm getting cross i've heard of like some strange-ass drugs being used in like you know the la sort of party scene shit like that. People are doing roofies themselves for fun. Oh, yeah. That's a strange one to me. I googled it.

It said five minutes, which isn't anything like the movies. Yeah, they need to be... It's a delicate process from what I've seen in movies where they put a damp cloth over... Not a damp cloth, a cloth or a mask over your face and they're

dripping with an eyedropper the correct amount over time because it's evaporating really quickly as it hits the mask. So you have to keep dosing them over time until they lose consciousness. What I never understand, and if we're ever in a survival situation, here's how

you do it, man. If you've got to take my leg, do not have me chug our bottle of alcohol. We need that to fucking sanitize the wound you're about to create. Choke me the fuck out! Choke me the fuck unconscious, and then get the blackened decker out.

How long would it take for you to be choked out? He can choke me unconscious in less than 15 seconds. you'll be back so fast no i'll be out no hold the fucking choke get my leg off i don't look get my leg off so when i i've been choking a couple of times i come back pretty quick like less than 30 seconds probably less than 15 but i'm confused and that confusion for me lasted a long time. Why are you cutting my leg off? Oh, more, more, more. One time I was on a business trip, but I was so into jits that like,

even though I was like visited a gym because I didn't want to miss a whole week and I got choked out. I drove home and it felt kind of like irresponsible. I was like, this is akin to drinking and driving driving home after having been choked out so the effects were lasting on me i feel like choking you out like yeah you would literally have to have woody hold you unconscious for like the entire sawing because within two seconds of him letting go you're like screaming and thrashing and no no i know he'd be thrashing yeah so we called it the

funky chicken at the gym like you sort of jiggle yeah i don't know i i mean i've seen some chokes held for too long in mma and they of course it's hard to tell if they're semi-conscious mostly conscious they're probably just laying there after the fact so it's kind of hard a lot of times they're like instructing them to lay there right like? Like, don't get up, don't get up. We're looking at you. But if you were cutting their leg off, they'd probably be more active and with it. All I know is I watched a, what did I fucking watch? Oh, the John Adams HBO series. I watched part of that and they have some kind of a goddamn ship to ship battle. And this guy gets his legs sawn off after drinking a bit of rum.

And it was like, fuck. Just fucking kill me, dude. That's the Paul Giamatti one, right? Yeah, he's great. I wish he was in more stuff. Dude, can you imagine how the best thing they had readily available for getting your legs sawn off

was alcohol, which is the worst thing to have in your body if you're about to lose a bunch of blood is it like yeah it thins your blood out and so you bleed a bunch more yeah that's a problem yeah it's a huge problem but they're like well it's either this or he just dies of shock from the pain or like whatever it's i wonder if that's uh it's also it's also something i wonder if i know it's good for high blood pressure, but I wonder if that's a cumulative effect of the red wine

or if that's like, no, just alcohol in your system thins your blood and it's good for your blood pressure. I don't know. It might not be the alcohol at all. It might be the grapes or something. Indeed, because red wine is supposedly the one. But yeah, man, the idea of having a limb taken off on a battlefield. Fuck me.

It's so awful. You're already fighting in some horrible war watching people's legs get ripped off Mel Gibson style. I saw one of those vets came back, right? He's all crippled up and they built him this

very nice house. They got to lower all the countertops and everything. It's a nice house. They've got to lower all the countertops and everything. It's a nice house. Every countertop in the house is the right level. Everything's got to be special. From the microwave to the refrigerator

to where the food is stored, a man in a wheelchair has to be able to grab and manipulate and operate everything in the house. The more you think about that, the more complex you'll realize these remodeling must have been. Then the guy's like i'm tom with channel 5 news and i'm showing you what neighbors around here have been reporting for months now well there's john there walking around his house here's him hopping in his truck and doing this and that his truck was like an f-250

on big tires lifted you had to climb in it they they walked he wasn't even trying to be tricky so john do you want to you want to talk i heard that you had this house built it was a lot of money tom it's a lot of money to build this and he he's just like, get off my property. And he's like, we decided to respect his wishes. No shit. Tom looks like he might shoot. Oh, I'm sorry. Do you not believe in miracles? I do.

Anything is possible with Jesus on my side. All things are possible through Christ who strengthens me. That is the defense I would use if I was in Texas. I would absolutely use I was in Texas. I would absolutely use that defense. Did you hear the aftermath of that, Kyle? Did they take his shit away? They paralyzed him for real. I think he got murdered in prison.

What the fuck? And his wife went to prison too because she was in on it. Holy shit. He was murdered. I didn't know any of that. Oh my god. What happened to the guy with the weights that he stuck in the trout? Did they kill him too? Same people got him?

I don't want to see this guy. Dude, when he was going down, he should have stabbed himself in the L3 vertebrae or whatever with an ice pick and been like, God took it back! I told you it was a miracle. Now he smited me just to keep me out of jail.

I switched to Islam on the down low and he knew about it. He's stolen back his glory. I was wrong. It was Jesus the whole time. It was a huge mistake. Harkening back to half an hour ago, would you be worried if you were me

unbaptized walking the earth and all? You think I'm opening myself up? Yeah, absolutely. You think I'm opening myself up to any sort of spiritual attacks that I otherwise would be immune to? Let me put it this way. There's no doubt in my mind that that is happening to you. Yeah. You absolutely need to cover your bases.

You can even get baptized multiple times. But what you don't know is it's kind of like a reset thing. You get Baptist baptized, and then you get Episcopalian baptized. It deletes the baptism. Oh, come on. This isn't funny now. I need to be washed in the blood of the Lamb. I would never joke about this.

You fucking... No, you need to get it. And it takes like no time at all. When I got baptized... Who blows the horn? There was no horn. When I did it, I had Morona. No, not at the fucking...

First of all, I'm well aware that the moil blows the horn and that there is one. I was talking about the one when the Lord comes back and they blow the horn and they start taking the good souls up and leave the bad ones behind. That'd be Michael. Gabriel. He's the guy with the horn. Gabriel is the trumpet.

Will it hurt the unwashed ears of the masses? I don't actually know if that's going to hurt the unwashed ears. It'll be a jubilation, a sound of jubilation for those who are saved and a sound of terror for those who aren't. But I don't know. I got confused between reading Revelation and watching that movie Left Behind.

Yeah. With the guy from that 80s sitcom in that. And also the Seth Rogen comedy. Yeah. In Left Behind and in This is the End, they have this version where it's like, oh, the rapture happened, but there's extra time on the clock. It's OT.

You can still make it in. You can slip one past the goalie, get into heaven. That's like This is the End and that other movie, Left Behind. I don't think that's biblical. I don't think there's a last call. I'm pretty sure once that happens, you're either in or out. They want you on your toes.

See, it would be counterproductive for that to be in your religion. Like, hey, hey, you know, all of you who are in on it from the very beginning, you get the same treatment as the guy who sees hell coming and then says,

oh, me too. Yes, please. There'd be no advantage to... I hate this with video games when they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

We're, we're pre-selling it. You give us the $75. What do I get for, for buying it early? Ah, you get a soundtrack. Oh,

like, oh, okay. No, fuck that. No, you burn in hell. You burn in hell.

It's worse than burning in hell. You stay here on the scorched earth. I don't know what exactly happens. I guess you would live on the cursed earth under the, the antichrist until he just turned it perhaps into another scape of hell yeah perhaps dropped it down another dimension into his own realm or realms the antichrist will be sneaky because he's not gonna he's not gonna come out and be you know he's not gonna have horns he's gonna be He's not going to have horns. He's going to be a tricky, good guy who does stuff like heal the blind.

The mark of the Mr. Beast. The mark of the beast. The mark of the Mr. Beast. Hang on a fucking minute. You've just struck on something. I think I may have. I think you might. What do you know about the beast?

The mark of the beast? The mark of the Mr. Beast? The mark of the Mr. Beast. That's just a hickey. The mark of the Mr. Beast is when you buy one of his chocolate bars. Has he ever done a video where he like inoculated a bunch of people for like smallpox in Africa or something like that?

Not yet. That could be next. He might have done. I think he cured some not cured something, but I think he got a bunch of like vaccines to people once, I think. He had a lot of people injected with something. Maybe. Alright, well let's keep subscribing to

Mr. The Beast. Mr. The Beast. okay all right well let's keep subscribing to the beast mr the beast i'm so surprised if you're not i'm so surprised you came to this conclusion without seeing that giant twitter thread on that because someone just randomly tweeted one day mr beast is the antichrist and i don can't explain it, but he is. And that was the whole thing. And everyone's like, well, you know what? Beast, Beast. Makes sense. Say no more. One for one.

Healthy people, two for two. It seems like that would be against his credit, but it works. Have you ever seen The Omen, Taylor? It has a famous baboon scene. Do you remember the baboon scene? Not really. Or the angry little monkeys, at the very least, whatever those are. There's a scene, and they use real monkeys,

where they have that woman and her child in a car, and they just have it swarmed with monkeys, like the big scary kind with the fangs. And they're hopping up and down and screaming. I might get this wrong, but my recollection of the behind the scenes was that they had kidnapped one of the monkeys and like made him think that it was in the car or something like that and they were like trying to help their buddy so that's why they're all going

crazy and like banging on the car now then the premise of the movie the omen is that they've birthed the antichrist and this little boy damien who, who plays... It's a good movie. It's old, but it's good. He's a spooky fucking kid. They kept making sequels. I've only seen the 70s version. I think that's the one you're talking about. Yeah, absolutely I am. It's real disturbing the way those monkeys are swarming the car, though. Rosemary's Baby. I've actually never seen that, but I want to see that. That's another good Antichrist movie. I know it's good because everybody says it is, but I've just never seen it.

I've seen a lot of people beating up monkeys all the time lately. Monkeys are pussies, and we have dramatically overestimated their ability to fight. What scale of... While we took on like 7, 12 monkeys, we all saw it. Those were little bitch-made monkeys, that is true.

I put a guy beating up a monkey on that bridge today in the whatsapp he assaulted a monkey by the way he did assault that monkey that monkey did not have that coming i think that guy should be in jail yeah that guy was like nicely holding the monkey the monkey went to attack him and you fuck around and find out and just to be clear he was one of of those muscular brown Asians that looked like they could really throw down. Like... All those monkeys and got the pink backpack. And rabies.

Oh my god. I mean, but like, those monkeys... First of all, that clip of that dude beating those monkeys on the bridge today, those monkeys did not have it coming from what I could see. They were kind of being playful and silly, and that guy was like throwing real punches at little monkeys don't care for it i would have stepped in i would just i i thought the monkeys had it coming i need to re-see it now because i i'm open to the idea that i'm wrong but i thought the monkeys threw

the first punch i would have put them in a full nelson and given the monkeys each like two free shots guess what now you have all sorts of monkey scratches and you're going to be sick in the hospital for a while that fucker like you tried to reserve a parking spot exactly fuck you you bullying these monkeys they're littler than you monkeys again i want a theme park where you can fight different animatronic animals that are covered in like nerf style armament to keep them from hurting you. So you can actually do battle with

beasts. What's that robotic company that have the little dog and everything? Boston something? Boston Dynamics. Give me a Boston Dynamics Silverback Gorilla all nerfed up.

And let me do battle with that motherfucker. I want him to sling me across the room 15 feet into some netting. Really nerf it up. Let's have a good time. The kids are going to love this. The kids would love that. I would love that. I would be the first one in line. I'd try. I would be its friend though. I wouldn't fight it and I would convince it

to join with me. You reprogram it, dude. You need not to battle any longer, great one. There was this study they did. This questionnaire they gave to a bunch of Americans, and they just asked, in a list, what animal

could you beat in hand-to-hand combat? Isn't that a list? We've got a sense of humor. That's what that list means. It also shows that we are a nation of settlers. We came and we fought the engines and fought the scary bears and the animals. You guys all stayed home in your nice, comfy, no AC houses. It was us and the French. It was us and the French.

Yeah. The French? Yeah, they were with us up there in fucking Minnesota in those trapping waters up there fighting off those dirty North Canadian Indians. They were all French. You saw that Leonardo DiCaprio movie, right?

The one with the Oscar? When the bear mauled the fuck out of him? Yeah. Do you think that was Leo's best performance? No. Do you think that was real? If I ever said that, I'm wrong. But it was definitely fuck out of him. Do you think that was Leo's best performance? Do you think that was real? If I ever said that, I'm wrong.

But it was definitely not his best performance. I thought it was awesome. Did you like Titanic when that little boy toy hooked up with Kate Winslet? Say what? Which one was his best performance? Which one did you like? I was suggesting Titanic because

he was... Blood Diamond is really good. Blood Diamond. performance which one did you like oh i was suggesting like titanic because he was no blood diamond is really good you called him a blood diamond blood diamond shutter island catch me if you can um the one where he played howard hughes was quite good um inception was really good i don't know if that's oscar worthy though he was better than inception he had i think shutter island and and Blood Diamond came out the same year. That or I watched them the same year. That's also possible, too.

That's why it stuck in my head. I remember Shutter Island sticking with me. Inception's his best movie, but the question was his best performance. I don't think Inception's his best movie. I like Shutter Island more than Inception. I like Catch Me If You Can better than any of those movies. I love Catch Me If You Can. That's where he's

the fraudster and he's running from fucking the most famous actor in the goddamn world. Tom Cruise. Tom Hanks. Tom Hanks. Yeah, he's running from Tom Hanks. Yeah, I couldn't think of that. Off the top of my head,

that's it. That's my favorite Leonardo DiCaprio movie. But yeah, I don't know that he deserved the Oscar. You know, I've seen it two or three times. He does, like, really have spittle coming out. He's all groaning.

It's a matter of who he meets. Right? Like, does he deserve the Oscar? Did anyone else deserve it more that year that's the question to add very true who are the nominees oh i don't know shucks i could look it up oh yeah let's let's fully flesh this shit out let's see if we don't deserve it who got shit on so leo could have track of who wins oscars and stuff i know i know if someone hasn't and they should usually but I forget like years later who the other nominees were for sure

I usually watch the movies that win the Oscars this year it was everything everywhere all at once right? didn't they win best picture? and then a few years ago it was The Shape of Water I usually try to watch the nominees I have it in front of me.

Bryan Cranston in Trumbo. I don't know that one. Matt Damon in The Martian. Michael Fassbender as Steve Jobs. And Eddie Redmayne as Danish Girl. I didn't see Danish Girl, and I couldn't pick that Eddie person out of a lineup, but I saw all those other movies and I really liked,

um, Damon and the Martian, but he didn't go to, I think it's, it's, there's similar movies. If you think about it, the journeys that those characters go through,

it's, it's, it's, it's, they're stranded, they're hurt. They got to come back from it and get home. And,

uh, I think Leo's performance is better because he's just real. He's just more fucked up. As bad as it is to be stranded on Mars, Jesus, Leo's in the wilderness with enemies everywhere. And animals trying to eat him. That was real snow and he was cold. And that was real ice water.

He ate those fish raw. Yeah, whereas I'm sure that wherever desert they filmed the Martian in is raw. It's a fucking set. He's probably in Southern California. I bet he's in a Paramount fucking studio or whoever made that movie.

I don't know, but he's in a big old blue screen room. Old moon landing site. Yeah. They went low budget by doing it on the moon instead of actually that's my conspiracy theory is that stanley kubrick is still alive and still faking space oh i haven't heard that one i don't think anyone thinks yeah i think that's only that's true no i believe we went to the moon 100 we did all that stuff i mean mean, nobody else has been, so we're definitely the winners.

Lots of people have sent probes and you know, shit. And I, I think we're going, huh? That doesn't count. You can't send a person there. You can't send a person there and then be like,

dude, look how impressive this Rover is. Like once you've gone that you can't go back. What I would do if I was China, I would send like self-assembling monument or statue or something that would kind of one-up the flag that we left.

And I think maybe we left a plaque that said, we came for all mankind. I think that's what it says. Sexy. A plaque? Pretty cool. I don't know. It's probably made out of platinum or some shit. It lasted a trillion years.

But no, the Chinese should land some sort of little robot that assembles itself like a wedding cake, like taller and taller. It's just a big Chinese. That would be great. Maybe Mao, just sort of looking disapprovingly down at the American flag. I want like Mao and Neil Armstrong and a Captain Phillips meme that says, look at me, I'm the American flag. I want like Mao and Neil Armstrong and a Captain Phillips meme

that says, look at me, I'm the astronaut now. That's what they should do. Maybe the statue is just kind of a comical Xi Ping or whatever his name is in the astronaut suit, like smiling. That's the one-upsmanship that I'd like to see out of the Trump administration. If he comes back from the seven-point deficit

that he's at right now in the national popular poll. I didn't know that. I believe he's down seven. It might have been nine. I think it's probably two different polls. It's so early. I actually think Ron DeSantis will win the primary, but I'm not sure. He's not going to put a statue on the moon.

No, no, no. Not a fucking statue. I need Donald Trump to go. Ooh, make the fucking nfts real i need i need imagine here's the thing donald trump sold nfts of him on the moon if he then became president and actually went on the moon do you you know what a Donald Trump on the moon NFT would be worth? Nothing. Nothing. I would like to see Trump make a major plank in his platform

just to recreate all the NFTs. I want to see him as a cowboy, an astronaut. What else did he do secretary of treasury i'm choosing this nft of a dollar sign you want a trump calendar shoot i need him to go though like like what if he announced he's like not only are we going back to the moon i think i'm going to take a personal hand in this. I'll be captaining the mission. And so he has to like. That'd be very Trump like.

For whatever reason, according to military code, to do what he wants to do, he has to have a military rank. So now he gets to wear the uniform. Right? And he just slowly, he slowly transitions into the uniform at first. You're like, yeah, he has to be in it.

It's his induction day. He's being respectful. But he's wearing it that night at the party, like the after party. And they're like, he wanted to spend more time with the crowd. Of course. But then the next day, he still got it on. I hope that he's coming.

People, people, you're not going to believe this. You're not going to believe it, folks. Just found out, just now, just now. We never going to believe this. You're not going to believe it, folks. Just found out, just now, just now, we never went to the moon. We never went, but believe me, folks, this is being corrected.

This is being corrected. You've been lied to for too long. The Trump administration is making it to the moon. Don't tell us we can't do it. We can do it. These scientists, they tell me they destroyed the technology. You can't go anymore. I say, fuck you. We're going. Who's going to be the first man, Mr. President?

Who's going to be the first man or woman, or perhaps other to step foot on... It's going to be Barron. It's going to be Barron Trump. We want to have the first 7'6 person on the moon. He will be the tallest

astronaut ever, as well as the first to step. Can the president wear the uniform? I looked for Trump in pictures of his uniform for real, and he wore what I'll call Air Force-style jackets, but he's commander-in-chief. That's a school uniform.

I'm not trying to be silly i or no it was a school it was a military it looked like an air force jacket or an army jacket or something and it was while he was president like a bomber jacket like i've seen a lot of guys do that i don't know that that's what i can find it yeah i'd love to see it because i want to call a spade a spade. I thought you were referring back to... W was a pilot in the reserves. True. Here's a... Zach, you can show it if you want. He wore this. There's a couple different things. I've been wearing stuff like that.

I wonder if he's... Is he entitled to wear an actual uniform as Commander-in-Chief? That's comparable to what I'm wearing. He's wearing a jacket that has like it's like a commemorative thing maybe with the the gerald r ford right but then that's his fucking name and it says commander-in-chief like wait is that what you see yeah on his on his on hit our right his left breast oh okay j trump commander-in-chief like i told you i make my things so small so i

can look roughly at the camera. I understand. I'm just sharing. I see it now. Right? So that's like military-ish, but it's not a uniform. If you told me the commander in chief was entitled to wear the uniform, I'd buy it.

Yeah, I bet they're allowed to wear whatever they want. Again, what would his rank be? Commander in chief. No, no, no. he cannot wear a fucking military there's a this the whole point of the presidency if i understand correctly is that you have a civilian running the army and that's a separation you cannot have a fucking rank what i'm saying is this jabroni makes it so he becomes a goddamn banana republic no i fucking like commander in chief you know what i mean he's like i had banana republic fucking like commander in chief you know what I mean he's like hey they call me the

commander in chief I thought make me at least a commander hell fuck it make me a goddamn five star general no six the first ever like he's just making shit up second ever six stars we've had six star generals isn't uh Washington uh how many dragon

balls were I mean Jesus isn't George Washington the only six star generals isn't uh didn't they make washington uh how many dragon balls were i mean jesus isn't george washington the only six star general ever i heard that they gave him like a special rank of everyone what is it called when they do it with a dead guy posthumously yeah posthumous that's what i'm looking for i think they might have posthumously yeah i knew it was some sort of trivia thing where it's like oh actually george washington ranks higher than everyone because they gave up my, because it was basically a magic combo. They retired that card.

It costs billions on eBay now. Yeah. Reverse. I'm president. What is it, the Black Lotus? Yeah, the Black Lotus. That's the expensive one. On the subject of astronauts, would you like to see the youngest astronaut in space? It was via Jeff Bezos.

Let's see. Yes. Quite good. Here's a Twitter link, Zach, if you'd like to pull up any of those photos. And I'm not kidding. This is the youngest astronaut currently holding the record. He's not sending babies, is he? It's a furry.

They went in a fursuit. In a furry suit. Did he want to risk losing human life? They are in the astronaut suit. Look at this. It's like, yeah, they actually did it. That's what that pose means.

His pronouns are he, she, and they. That's all of them. Yes, but the species on the other hand is his pronouns are he she and they that's all of them yes but the species on the other hand is Mr. Meeps god damn it that's not a look I bet Mr. Meeps

is one hell of a god damn astronaut you know I got no joke I worry about the potential for fire with his furry suit I really hope that the apparatus for fire with his furry suit. I really hope that the apparatus for relieving themselves will conjoin with whatever portholes

or ports his suit may have. This is the vanguard of our potential PR wing to aliens. Nah. We need somebody. Put like who's a good Patrick Stewart. He's old. Matthew McConaughey.

Patrick's too old. He's frail. I want Matthew McConaughey leading the fucking... Before it was cool. Because he can be smooth and calm with the aliens, but if they step out of line, he can go there. You know what I mean? Hey, go ahead and pull that out of my ass. Pull that out of my ass.

I noticed looking at your energy shields they're uh not very polarized do you know how many nuclear weapons we're in possession of like he'd go there he'd go a scary place he could talk about virus bombs or something and they'd be like based as well pussies we are not threatened by y'all have pussies now we are robots i guess instead of alien i'd watch that movie i'd watch a movie where matthew mcconaughey was standing down the alien general on first contact and he's like y'all a bunch of pussies actually do y'all have pussies jay dave explain the concept of a pussy to this motherfucker and like like some guy next to him like explains what a vagina is and all the

context everything that matthew mcconaughey just punches him i need that i need that you gotta put that head to head with the summer blockbusters matthew mcconaughey fighting back avatar three perverse way against the aliens where they're like we are here to share technologies like hey i want to talk to you about pussy once again we are here for curing disease if i could hang out with one celebrity it'd be matthew mcconaughey i'm so sure of that that he or or honestly and and and they're they've they've done stuff together woody harrelson seems pretty chill too like those guys in particular seem like they would be down to earth and not seth rogan seems like such a fucking piece of shit such he doesn't seem fun to hang out with tom cruise seems fun to hang out with he could take you on adventures and show you how to do flips oh man he's gonna want me to i don't know if i it'd be like that uh seinfeld episode where george

wants them to try to get him in the cult but they're not interested in him so they don't try to recruit him and he's like you don't want me i'm not good enough for you he's like now he's trying to get in the cult like The whole time, I'd be ready to reject Tom Cruise's invitation into Scientology. He wouldn't say shit about it the whole time. I'd be like, given he's leading, I grew up really religious, but

just didn't do it for me. Antidepressants? No thanks. That just doesn't feel right. He'd be like, hey, whatever works for you works for me uh you know everybody's happy wouldn't say shit come on god damn it talk to me about the thetans i want to get fucking censored what do they call it when you hold on to the little poles and they ask you all those tested yeah my body thetans i've gotten so fucking many tom Tom. I'm flush with Thetans. I think that's a show.

Finn, thank you so much for joining us in our Return to Asia. Finn, if everybody wants to see your lady bulge and your rear end, where were they? Yeah, go over to

Finn's OnlyFans. If you guys want to see his lady bulge and more go to Woody's Hard Drive dude I could do a discount code we'd love a code come on as soon as this episode comes out the first I don't know

100 people get 69% off I could do like, as soon as this episode comes out, like the first, I don't know how many, I don't know, a hundred people get, yeah, 20, 69% off, dude. It'd be a big sale. Boom. What's the code to be? What's the code to be? Oh, it's just good.

There's going to be a link. As soon as you, as soon as this thing's out, first person to go there, first hundred, you can do it like that. All right. Boom. So in July, Saturday, 9 a.m. All right, boys.

PKA 648.