Painkiller Already - PKA 756 W/ Tavarish: Israel Attacks Iran?!? WW3 Live Reaction
Episode Date: June 14, 2025...
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PKA 756 with our guest, Tavaresh.
Taylor.
This episode of PKA is brought to you by Lock and Load,
our wonderful merchandise and Harry's.
We'll learn more about all of that later.
Actually, you're not gonna learn more about Lock and Load.
There's no new discoveries.
You're gonna hear the same thing I've been saying
for years.
Or you might do a variation of the joke.
I might do a variation of a joke,
but even that'll be repeat.
So, look forward to that, guys.
I've never heard of it. Can you tell me, like, just do a quick 35 minutes on it, please?
I think we should spend a quick hour, just a crisp hour.
You think people would like that we front load the sponsors and we try and like,
we try and fail to make it organic. It's like, Woody, that game you've been playing reminds me of how much I've been coming. And coupon
go jizz, but to ready.
Last time you were on, you had a flood damage $2 million
McLaren that you were bringing back to life. Yes. Where so? So
it is still being brought back to life.
It actually, I thought it was gonna be a lot easier
than it actually was, and it's very, very hard.
Now, what happens in a lot of these projects
is like any project, scope creep.
So scope creep means that like we first set out
to do like just a regular rebuild.
So we want to rebuild the car as it was when it left the showroom.
And then we decided, well, why not, you know, if we have this car in this shape,
why not make it a little bit more, you know, like why not make it more notable?
Why not do something really special?
So we decided to make the fastest McLaren in the world. So right now, the fastest McLaren in the world
is a car called the Speedtail.
And its top speed is about 250 miles an hour.
So we're trying to beat that.
And the P1, which is the flood car that I have,
originally came with a hybrid system.
So it had a high-voltage battery,
and it was a hybrid, hybrid car.
So we took that hybrid out.
We built the engine.
So the engine is not producing, you know, came with a hybrid system. So it had a high voltage battery and it was a hybrid hybrid car. So we took that hybrid out. We
built the engine so the engine is now producing, you know, the
car combined before was producing somewhere around 900
horsepower. Now on engine alone, it should be 1400. So we lowered
the weight, added power. And now I just got done. I just came from the UK like a few days ago,
and I talked to the original designer of the car. His name is Frank Stephenson, and he designed the
car and he wanted to get in touch with me because he wanted to design a custom body for my car. So
the original designer of the car is like, we're making a one-off thing for top speed.
And again, it's just turning into this big thing.
So hopefully in the next few months,
it should be all together.
But right now suspension is in Poland getting rebuilt.
The exhaust is in upstate New York.
I have stuff getting powder-coated.
So it's not exactly like it is on TV,
where like in half an hour they go like,
oh, the customer's on his way.
We gotta get the car ready.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Dude, that's crazy.
Like you said scope creep and I'm like, right, right.
They probably didn't know this would be rusted
or underestimated the extent of the electrical damage.
No, fastest car in the world.
Yes.
That's compelling content.
Yeah, yeah.
And I think if we have the ability
to do something interesting, why not?
Because one thing about this car is like,
most people when they buy this car,
obviously it costs a lot of money.
So they don't really drive them.
They leave them as they were from the factory.
And, you know, they're cleaning them
with a cloth diaper or something.
But for me, I got the car and it was in its worst state.
So I could put tools on it, I can sit on it,
I can do whatever I want.
And every time I take off a bolt, I'm making the car better.
So why don't we, when we build it,
why don't we build it to a better standard
than it was originally.
How will you go about testing its top speed?
Like I-40?
Yeah, yeah, well, three in the morning, the witching hour.
Those salt flats, I've seen that online.
Well, salt flats are interesting.
The problem with salt flats is you lose a lot of speed
unless your car is specifically made for it.
There are harder packed surfaces
and kind of like softer packed,
but salt flats, you really need to have a car
that's built for that.
So you have tires that are probably a little bit
like narrower and it does a number on the car.
So I'm not gonna be doing that.
What I'm gonna do is about an hour and a half away
from where I live, I have the NASA runway,
the Cape Canaveral.
So it's three miles long.
So that's where the space shuttle landed.
And right now you can actually rent that out
for top speed runs.
So they do, you know, yeah.
And-
Did you say three miles long?
Three miles long, yeah.
250 miles an hour, I mean, yeah. 250 miles an hour.
I mean, it's incalculable.
That's not a lot of time.
It's not, but I mean,
I wager the car should get to above 220,
or like about 215 to 220 in the first,
say like half mile,
but after that it's a real slog.
And you're carrying a lot of speed.
So I like, nobody's really done this,
especially with this car, because from the factory,
the top speed was 217 miles an hour.
So realistically, nobody knows what's gonna happen
to the aerodynamic profile after that.
And we're putting out so much power on the engine
and we're going to the tippy top of the rev range so you know say wait who's gonna be behind the
wheel so my friend and I am Jeremy you say this it is the stick so it is it's
my friend Ben Collins who was who was Top Gear Stig.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, that's...
That was so on the nose, Taylor.
That's perfect.
Yeah.
You have your own Stig.
I was gonna tease and be like,
oh, you're spending all that money
and you're not even gonna be the one
pushing it to the limit.
But if you literally have the Stig,
Yes.
like that would be silly not to use them.
Yeah.
And he is one of these guys that
He's very like posh
And you know, he's very soft-spoken but the second you get him into a car he becomes the most
like
He becomes aggressive and he becomes not not confrontational
But you can tell that he wants to be the fastest thing on the track. So and he's also a guy
that did all the stunt driving for like James Bond. So he did
the Daniel Craig Bond movies. He's done some stuff for Marvel
Fast and Furious. So he does very technical car work. So he
knows his way around a car. And he's also driven the Veyron to
top speed, which is 250 something miles an hour. So he knows his way around a car. And he's also driven the Veyron to top speed, which is 250 something miles an
hour. And he told me he told me that that was on a public road.
So, you know, it seems like he has a little bit of experience
with this. I don't I've never been that fast in a car. I've
never been past 180. I'd like to go pretty fast. I don't want to
go so fast.
There were a couple sticks, right? Yes. Is your friend the one that beat Lewis
Hamilton?
No, so they had I actually I'm not sure. So this is the stick that everybody
sort of like Top Gear in his heyday. So in the middle kind of middle seasons,
that was the stick that everybody
kind of grew like when Top Gear was growing, he was the stick. Originally, they had a black stick,
like a black suit stick. And then he did some interview with like, either radio interview or
some interview where he said, Oh, yeah, I'm the stick. And then they had to fire him. And then,
oh yeah, I'm the Stig. And then they had to fire him.
And then, and for the show, they fired him from,
like they put him in a Jaguar and put nitrous on it
and then fired it off an aircraft carrier.
And then they had a new Stig with a white suit.
So he was a Stig with a white suit.
But then there was a whole hubbub about like Ben Collins
coming out with a book saying, I am the Stig.
And then there was a thing about that.
And then they kind of retired him. But that was, I think, season like 13 or 14. But I mean,
it might be later than that. Yeah, I knew they had a lot of Stig's like, almost all my top
gear watching experiences from those specials. But I have seen like the little jokey ones,
like they love the Americans are big fat idiots joke on there.
Especially Jeremy Clarkson, who is himself fat.
And so do you remember the fat American Stig?
Yes.
Yeah, they got this big fat guy and he's like, it's the American Stig.
And then they like had him race around and it was like, well,
I mean, better than I could, but not as good as the real Stig.
Yes. Yes. No, it was really funny. They had, well, I mean, better than I could, but not as good
as the real steak.
Yes. Yes. No, it was really funny. They had the Stig's African cousin, the Stig's Italian
cousin where he just gets out of an RV, you know, with a bunch of girls following him.
There's the Australian one. He just has like a giant like dong imprint in his pants. So yeah, yeah, they did a lot of, a lot of fun stuff,
but he was the one that did a lot of the, the main sort,
like when, when you saw Top Gear become the thing
that it is today, well, not the thing that is today,
but when it was in his heyday, he was the guy.
Okay. Well then if he can't break the record,
then you know, the car is just not
up to snuff yet. Yeah I just I just didn't build it right I just yeah.
Should have taken that pulse a little more. What are you gonna do if like it's like one mile per hour low?
Like you're already have the place rented are you gonna be like all
right all the seats are gone like you're gonna have to squat Mr. Stig I'm sorry and try to drive it's gonna be uncomfortable for are gone. Like you're going to have to squat.
Mr. Sting, I'm sorry.
I'm trying to drive.
It's going to be uncomfortable for a bit.
Do you need a windshield?
100% I think at 250 miles an hour,
you probably need a windshield because like a rock or let's
say a bug, a bird like that will take your head off.
It just goes lower.
It's aerodynamic without it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Would act like a big break.
But yeah, if we're like a mile an hour.
What if you pop out the rear windshield too, Kyle?
Think it through.
And duck.
That's cool.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, it's going to be fun.
The reason why I did top speed is because it seems like,
when I was a kid, I always thought
that having a car that is the fastest
in the world at something was a big deal.
Yeah, cars can go around tracks and stuff,
but there's no frame of reference,
especially when you're a kid.
But if you're like, hey, this car is like super crazy fast,
like this is the fastest thing
that's ever been put on a road,
then something clicked with me. So when i was a kid that was
a mclaren f1 and the mclaren f1 is still the fastest naturally aspirated car which means
that doesn't have turbos or superchargers so um it went 241 miles an hour and that was in the early
90s and not only did it do that it won like lam Mans and a bunch of other races. It was this high horsepower, low weight car
made by this guy named Gordon Murray.
And now it's $20 million.
Now it's a car that is unattainable.
I don't have any way of ever buying it,
unless even if it burned absolutely to the ground,
it would still be worth way more than what I can get every,
like if I sold everything, I couldn't buy a burned version
of this car. Yeah. So yeah, but now I think the P one was the
yeah, that's the F one. That's what it's so cool. Me, me and
you won the fastest overall. So the P one is the it's supposed
to be the spiritual successor to the F one, the P1 got away from the top speed stuff because they wanted
to focus more on lap times and like that sort of thing.
So I had active arrow and they didn't focus on so yeah,
that's the P1.
Wow.
And they didn't focus on top speed or big numbers,
but it was like part of what they call the hypercar,
the hypercar Holy Trinity.
And it was a hybrid car. And they were trying to roll out this, this new technology back in 2010
to 2013. So they were, they had big batteries and they could do things that other cars couldn't. And
now that technology is pretty obsolete. So I did a bunch of stuff to the engine, made the engine bigger.
I strengthened the internals of the engine.
So we also have turbos made by the original company
that made the turbos for this car.
It's a company in the Netherlands called Tachyon.
And they like, not CNC, they had designed a turbo,
like two turbos for this car.
As we're talking about the McLaren again now.
Yes. I got lost.
Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Sorry. Sorry.
So this is talking about like my car, my P1,
the build that I'm, the build that I'm doing.
And yeah, it's just, we've, we've done a lot and sorry.
Like my apologies. I do talk about this a lot.
So, you know, I get like animated and you're passionate.
It's good.
I probably talk to people who know more about
cars than me most of the time. So yeah, I need more hand
holding. I don't think you've ever spoken to someone who knows
less about cars than me. I like when we have like car centric
guests on in my head, I'm like, I can think of a good question
and like something that is interesting about cars.
And then I'll realize immediately that like all my questions are like, what's the coolest car?
Like the question I want to know.
That's pretty good. What's the car?
Active car. Good. Do you?
Yeah. Cars. Yeah. Or nay. Yeah.
What's your opinion on four wheels? Is that enough?
Is the go fast cars? which one's the best looking?
I know it's got to be at least four wheels because those three wheeled ones
look ridiculous and I don't like them.
They do. And they're really hard to turn.
So, yeah, I mean, listen, we can talk about something other than cars.
I've I've I've been in the UK doing events and stuff.
And believe me, I've had my share of talking about cars.
Let's talk about how you guys do and I haven't talked to you guys in a while.
Doing doing pretty good. Getting getting railroaded by these fucking contractors trying to tell me
it's going to be a quarter million dollars to do some stuff to my have you talked to a second
contractor yet? Well, I was just playing it up. The second guy actually supposed to come around,
come out to my house tomorrow at
like nine or so.
And so I'll get more.
Yeah. This is my favorite Internet drama going on right now. Taylor's renovation.
Yeah. Drama between me and just at this
point, one contractor,
one guy who's like and it's like he must
have thought I just fucking fell off the
back of an Apple cart when
he was like, oh, this is going to be $120,000.
Like really?
Cause everywhere online things again, they were asking,
chat was asking me and I couldn't recall it very accurately.
He, uh, well, part of what makes me think that he was just goosing a bunch of
numbers is he told me basically, Freddie, I had this guy out and and I'm like I want an egress window in my basement there's
already a pretty large window there shouldn't be an ordeal then I want to
rough out for a bath I want to add a bedroom bathroom in my basement maybe
finish out the gym do some flooring and bathroom remodeling upstairs but this
was this conversation was just about the basement okay and it's like it's a big
project to add a bedroom bathroom but it's also like when he told me like, Oh, minimum hundred thousand dollars.
I was like, okay.
Would you mind?
I was, I was polite.
I wasn't being cunty.
I was like, okay.
You know, he's like, yeah, it's so expensive nowadays.
And I'm like, I bet.
Can you send me an email?
Yeah, it's the worst.
Can you send me an email?
Like just kind of a breakdown.
He was like, definitely a hundred percent. I will send me an email like just kind of a breakdown? He was like, definitely.
100 percent.
I will send you my itemized estimation of this project.
And I like reclarified.
I'm like, and so the hundred thousand minimum, that's not for finishing the gym.
That's not for any of this stuff.
It's just for the bedroom bathroom part of this.
And he was my my camera just just I'd give me one second.
He's still there in audio in spirit with us. He was like, he
was like, Yeah, yeah, just for that 100 grand, the gym part
won't be too expensive. There's nothing needed there other than
a little bit of extra lighting for like can lighting overhead.
And then of course, the rubber flooring, which I could install
myself. And he still has not emailed me. It's been over a
week. I sent a little follow-up contact to him like hey
Would you mind sending that email over tell him tell him everyone else is coming in at four five hundred thousand. It's crazy
Start out like that
Everyone else is gonna be seven eight million
What else is going to be seven, eight million?
We're talking like, like millet.
They're using those bolts that the Navy has commissioned that are $7,000 a piece. And so that's what those Navy nails are doing me in.
But yeah, I'm got the second guy coming out tomorrow.
And then I think third and fourth guy should be early next week.
One of them was supposed to be earlier this week and he had to reschedule.
So hopefully I can get it figured out. I'm not in a huge rush, but I feel like that's
the time you want to do these projects. That's the guy you want, Taylor. If he's late during the sales call,
I'm sure he'll be on time for the actual delivery. Exactly. It's like you couldn't even send out an
itemized lie to me. Or the other guy who didn't show up for the estimate. That's true. Yeah.
Or the other guy who didn't show up on, like didn't show up for the estimate.
That's true. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Uh, if I recall the name of the company of the guy who didn't show up was like
budgets to the max, some, some like, uh,
playing up the budgetary aspect. He probably wasn't lowest bidder.
The lowest probably dealing with the storm damage, right? There's like tons of houses there in Missouri fucked up.
I bet they've got all the work they could they can do in more
Yeah, how expensive was that every time I hear about tornadoes? It's like one house not every time of course, but like oftentimes
tornadoes are so
fickle like you can have like three three
There's the they're they switch direction all the time back and forth and so like you'll see pictures of like three houses. Temporal? No, they switch direction all the time, back and forth.
And so like, you'll see pictures of like Joplin or a Joplin bad example, that whole town got
leveled, but other towns where it's like, holy shit, that house is deleted, gone, torn
to shreds.
And the house three over has needs minor shingle work.
Like it's not like a hurricane where it's just a path of total destruction.
It's smaller and it changes direction all the time.
And so most of the people I know who had damage,
it's just roof.
I don't know anybody who got like sucked away.
Yeah, nobody got sucked.
That's when you got a real tornado
when people are getting sucked up and taken somewhere else.
When they find bits of them in another county.
When those wooden posts
are driven through concrete walls.
That's when you know, you know, Mother Nature put on a show.
Yeah.
But I haven't heard the tornado alarms in over a week now and so we're probably out
of the danger zone.
How much do you think those guys get paid?
How much do they get paid?
Those storm chaser guys?
Because they make it sound like it's an occupation that you can go to school for, but I think
it's just an asshole with a camera.
Yeah, that seems like
you could just learn everything you need on YouTube.
Yeah, even that.
I don't think you need to bother with the YouTube.
The only question is like, how close is too close?
And then, you know, Google AI will be like 60 feet
and then you take that to the bank and you just kind of stay further than 60 feet away.
Do the storm chases drive special cars?
Sometimes they do.
Sometimes they have like really tricked out fast trucks with armored paneling.
But sometimes it's just a guy on a Volkswagen with passion in his heart, Woody.
And that's the kind of guy that I want to watch.
I don't want to watch some guy who's got funding, who's got a $300,000 tornado. I want a guy who's in it for the love of the game. That's got. Yeah, I want to get I don't watch some guys got funding who's got a $300,000 tornado
I want a guy who's in it for the love of the game. That's got yeah, I want to guys are the new twisters
I have not I haven't seen the original twister. I saw the original CGI
We were still learning
Great first of all, that was like 94. I saw the theaters. I believed every minute of it. Those guys look real
Let's count it real. I was just like you were you were eight years old, of course
rewatch
Dorothy the whole bit. There's like what's in there five like finger of God. They have that fucking intense
I've seen that clip and it's the most embarrassing thing. Not at all. It's hard everybody's like
I've seen that clip and it's the most embarrassing thing. Not at all. It's hard. Everybody's like, Oh,
dude, everyone gets quiet. The bad guy. He's the bad like tornado chaser.
He's the one with all the funding and the sick and he's got a team,
multiple vehicles. He's got the sick, uh, storm truck. Yeah.
But does he have a bed filled with ping pong balls? I think not.
Dorothy is the machine's name. I think. No,
I didn't see the new one because I saw the old one and I thought it was so good.
I didn't think I needed to see the new one.
And I kind of, I know.
You shouldn't rewatch the old one either.
Have you seen the new one and the old one, Freddy?
It lives in here.
Yeah, yeah, I've seen both.
The old one is, it's good because if you remember,
like it's a nostalgia player, right?
So if you remember certain things like the cow flying
and you know, the two twisters turning into one and
them driving. Yeah, they're merging. It's a really big one.
Yeah, so I think that's, that's good. Because because you were a
kid back then, and it wasn't really hard to impress you.
However, now, I'm watching the new one. And it's like, real bad.
Like I so a lot of people like this movie. And I know people
are gonna be like screaming, but like, dude, it was it was
terrible. It was awful. Because the all of the characters are
completely unbelievable. They're also insufferable. Like I
understand that there's a there's an element of like you
have to be on a spectrum to go storm chasing like it just it
just happens.
But it's like it's so, so, so on the nose like the the main character.
It's like a pretty woman.
And she has she had a bad experience with the tornado.
I think like when she was a kid, her dad got up and didn't molest her.
It was that tornado. Exactly.
That was one. Yeah, the tornado l didn't molester. She's got history with that tornado. Exactly. That tornado killed her dad.
I was stock one.
Yeah, the tornado lured, gave me treats behind school
and he lured me into his van.
It knows what it did.
So she has some history with that.
But then she's like, she's part of some storm chasing thing.
Like she's a scientist, like a meteorologist or something.
And then, but like she seems like she hates all of it. And then
the the bad guy who's like, the bad guy is actually the good guy.
He's like a bad boy. But he also like went to school. So he's good
looking. And he has like a PhD. And he has like all the charisma
in the world. And he does cool stuff. He's a YouTuber, by the
way. And I love how movies portray exactly like him.
And also, I'm not sure if it's YouTuber.
That's exactly what a YouTube, a meteorologist, you're by the way, from the gaming space,
the most likely.
What the fuck is this?
So also, I'm not a you know, like this isn't, you know, super red pill to me, but like honestly,
if you look at him and you look at her, there is an imbalance here.
Like I think he's a little bit more pretty than the main character.
And what I think-
So much better.
He's beautiful.
And like, listen, he's a beautiful man. No, but what I think is better, he's beautiful. And like, listen, he's a beautiful man.
No, but what I think is originally trash.
I need to see her again.
Zach, who is this person we're talking about?
Exactly.
Exactly.
Nobody knows right.
You know, it's funny is I did see the first picture and I'm
like, she's pretty and then I saw him and I was like, wow,
no, that's that's a man.
So what I think is, initially, they had this role for somebody
else, like maybe a Scarlett Johansson or something like
that. They wanted so to attach some, like Sidney Sweeney or
something, right? Yeah. And then they couldn't get her. So now
it's like, all right, we need a second or third string. And but
we still got this, this guy on board, because he signed a
contract for, you know,
five movies after Top Gun.
So like, I think that probably is what happened.
Yeah. I mean, look at, look at that.
Look at, that makes no sense to me.
That is absolutely no sense.
I find it pretty charming.
It looks like his dikey sister.
Get out of here.
Get out of here.
You deserve better, sir.
Look at him in that hat.
Come on, come on.
Look how high our chin is. Look how high her chin is.
Look how high her chin is.
That's haughty.
That's haughty chin.
That's haughty.
That's haughty chin.
Kyle, perfect analysis.
And look at that.
Do you know how much of a tard
I would look like if I popped that hat on?
Do you know how much that hat would be up to be to pull that hat off?
Yeah, well, OK, a larger hat.
Look at her.
That is a good looking woman.
OK, well, well, I'm not saying she's not good I'm listening. I'm not I'm not trying to denigrate, you know,
her looks or anything like that. I just think that's small. There
is there is an element of like, one is obviously a movie star
and the other one isn't maybe maybe she cashed in, you know,
a favor or something. Maybe maybe it's one of those like,
maybe she's the cousin of somebody on set or whatever.
Maybe Neppo baby.
I like how we're just saying like all this crap.
She might be a great actress.
I got you back on this no matter where you go.
Yeah, it doesn't matter.
I've already decided I'm all in.
I'm on the other team.
I think she's delightful.
Yeah, you can go anywhere you want with this.
It's not that she's ugly.
She's definitely crazy to say she's ugly. Yeah you can go anywhere you want with it. It's not that she's ugly she's definitely crazy to say she's ugly she's a pretty girl
but that guy that guy's fucking he has a stunner. Yeah he was he was one of the main characters in
top country music career he doesn't even need to be able to see if I if I was like at the park
hiking with my girlfriend and I saw that guy coming the other direction on the path
that guy coming the other direction on the path.
I'd have to like make up an animal I saw.
Be like, whoa, sweetheart, get a load out there.
No, I think if we look for another 15 seconds, maybe
we'll see it again. No, there's a whole family of bears.
So that's what it was.
Yeah, no, I guess they just flew away.
Sorry. Yeah.
Yeah. So the movie sucks.
I think Hollywood in general has been I think there's an effort to to uglify the
ladies and to lower the the American male standard when it
comes beauty standard for women. I think it's a vast
conspiracy. It began video games and it's it's trickled down into
the movie industry. And we just got to hope that Sidney Sweeney
learns to act in the next three years before she expires.
So Sidney Sweeney is a really nice.
So I met her three years ago, something like that.
And we did an event.
Apparently, she's a she's a car person.
She built like this Ford Bronco or something.
So we met for like an eBay Motors event.
And I had no idea who she was.
She apparently did some euphoria HBO show euphoria
She did some scene where she was topless or something and then she had like good morning America
Coming in talking about that, you know, so they're like, what's it like?
What is it like for your grandma to know what what it you know to have to see you have sex or something and
Okay, this is yeah this this is just fucked like grandma probably isn't watching
Exactly. Um, but no she was she was totally nice. What I like is that now, you know her
I guess she's embracing her sexuality and whatever. She's selling her bath water or something like that. I saw yeah
Yeah, she couldn't bars of so not it's real. So it's a it's bars of soap with with
droplets of gamer girl water in them,
which is, I'm going to say, I mean, Belle Delphine walked so that Sydney could run.
Yes. Yes.
Because she was selling like vials of her Gamer Girl bath water.
They tasted awful.
But it was a whole vial.
Yeah, I don't think you're supposed to drink it.
But yeah, yeah, I get it. Yeah.
You can drink it.
You can drink it.
I mean, you could drink anything if you want to, yeah.
People are saying it.
I'm glad you're on my team.
I mean, not that I would know.
No.
Yeah, that's horrid to buy someone's bath water product.
Like what?
So I don't know.
You can just look at our tits online.
That's true. Online. I got links. Are we still on? Are we
on the Sydney Sweeney? Are we still talking about Veldo
Fiend?
I don't think it matters. I don't believe you. I want to
see.
Anyway, Kyle has like three either one. You just asked for
it.
Yeah, so yeah, I don't know. I think I agree with the, I guess
the uglification of Hollywood. But I think it's come just like with
politics, there's like an ebb and flow and sometimes a ping
pong and goes from one extreme to the other. And now it's like,
so in the 90s, it was like, stick figure thin with giant
boobs and no butt and then those women were like the babes like
the 90s babes, you know, and then those women were like the babes like the nineties babes you know and then the two thousands that
became a little bit more thick and then uh twenty tens was
like Kim Kardashian and Kim Kardashian was like you have to
have a giant giant BBL ass um and now it's like everything's
kind of out of proportion like if you look at especially my
Instagram for you page it's just giant everything um but I
think they're that's coming into the
mainstream. And now you have like Sydney Sweeney, where she
has like, you know, interesting, you know, features and that
sort of thing. And we're going back into that like, babe era.
So it's, I think there's gonna be like the, I guess, the
Millennials or what's the the generation after Millennials?
Yeah, like, so those might be the boomers of this, you know,
this century. Just, yeah, there's zoomers. But I mean,
like, in terms of the, the mentality with like, women in
politics and all that stuff, it's like, well, back in my day,
like, I think you're gonna see that a lot in them.
Every time I watch them, I've been doing this recently, I've
been watching some like 80s and some 70s stuff.
And it's like it's shocking how like sexualized it is and how like
the women are like bodacious bombshells with titties out everywhere.
And they don't talk too much.
No, dude. And the violence is like ridiculous.
It's like, man, I thought that we were the ultraviolent generation.
Like everything seems so tempered, so tapped down now compared to some of that
ultraviolent and especially with the titties and the nudity and the way that
that was treated. And I remember thinking when I was like maybe 18 or 19, I was going to buy a horror movie.
And I was like, all right, I want to rent one at the time.
I was like, all right, I want a slasher with titties.
And I want lots of people getting stabbed. And like, I want lots of people
getting stabbed. And I want I want at least seven and a half
titties.
There's a whole slasher titty section.
They don't make any movie anymore. Like that used to be a
whole genre of movie. It's like, are we going to stab 10 women?
And we're going to show you seven tits. And it costs 399.
Bring it back Tuesday. And they don't do that anymore. You can't
get that deal. That's not on the market anymore.
The value proposition is there for sure. But I think you can get something that is because there's a lot of indie movies and now, you know, the VFX artists and all that.
They can they can make something that looks pretty realistic if they have a lot of talent. And there are a lot of like, like back in the 80s and 90s, there were like these B
slasher movies, right? Those are the really cheesy, you know, it
has a crappy special effects and stuff like that. Now, I think
those people grew up and they're like, Hey, what if we like
actually disturbed people? Like what if we made something that
like when you when you close your eyes, you couldn't get that out of your mind so they will do something I forget
what it's called there's like something with a was it with a clown or something
like that he like saw somebody like yeah movies are there next level gruesome
and gory and to the point where it's not for me like I watched I watched ten
minutes of I think it started with the second one, because who needs to
see Terrifier 1?
Let's just start off in the second one.
Well, you got to know the story.
Yeah, no wonder you didn't like it.
There's a lot of complex lore.
Right away, he's beating this man to death with a hammer, and they're just zooming in
as the man's face is slowly turned to pulp as he screams in pain.
And I'm like, whoa, I'm not here for this I need you to
like creep around in the woods and go I really dislike that that specific gore
you just mentioned we're like some bad guy is beating a neutral character to
death like in the woods with a rock like straddling him like smashing his head in
and they get like four smashes in and then they a rock, like a straddling him like smashing his head in. And they get like four
smashes in. And then they jump cut to like a close up of another
hit on the guy's head that's already all mangled and the eyes
are out. And it's like, who's that for? Like, come on.
I don't know.
Was that in a pans labyrinth? So in pans labyrinth, there was a
it was like a Guillermo del Toro. So it's a it's a it's a movie about
fairies you know like it's a movie about you know fantastical beings and whatever and then there's a
scene where this guy just gets beaten to death like his his face gets smashed in with like a back
like the bottom of the wine bottle or something and and it's just like you see it getting smashed
in like it's it's pretty hyper realistic
It is it is but also just nightmare fuel. Yeah, they caught me off guard watching that movie. I thought it was gonna
General del Toro believes in monsters clearly because all of his movies have them now. I like that one a lot
You know, it's it's World War two I think too maybe the Italians or something. Mm-hmm. That's it. That's a good fucking movie and the character design is creature design
I should say is always oh, yeah. Oh, I haven't seen that before like like when you go to like
HR Giger designed all the alien stuff and some and also
If you watch species he all that that old movie like that's they also borrow heavily from Giger
Some of his more outrageous stuff, but it's all dicks and pussies and like big
Fucking big dicks like like all of HR Giger's stuff is this hyper sexualized
cybersexual
Biomechanical nightmare fuel and I'm I love it. I love the artwork
It makes a good top coffee table book and I love it. It love the artwork. It makes a good coffee table book. And I love what's on the alien stuff.
Alien and Predator, those universes are doing a lot of stuff this year.
I just watched Killer of Killers on Hulu.
It's an animated Predator movie where you at the beginning of it is three humans on Earth split throughout time.
There's a Viking.
There's a
Viking. There's a samurai. And then there's a World War Two fighter pilot for the Americans.
And you watch each of them contend with a different predator split out through time in their home
environments and win. And then at the end of them winning, they're kidnapped. And all three of them
are taken to like the predator planet to fight in a gladiatorial arena against like a giant predator and it was good.
Like the animation is a little fucky.
I think they used Unreal Engine to animate this thing.
But once you get past that, it was pretty good.
I finished it last night.
I really dug it.
I tried to start with.
There we go.
Cool.
Oh, the HR Geiger Dick monsters got him.
No, that's either that or one of his many dogs chewed a cable and
would be my guess. What is this more monsters? Would he?
Uh, it's just relevant.
It's got a whole new like error message that said he lost connection with me.
What was the last thing I said?
You're saying Sydney Sweeney's tits are really cool and you're going to show everybody.
So big. Nice nips, dude.
Like it's a huge fan.
One of these days, I'll see what her face looks like.
That's what her face looks like.
By the way.
Yeah, that's what her face looks like.
What a ghoul.
That guy's been stalking Arnold for 25 years.
Man, that's sad. No one in his life is like brother.
Shave it off, man.
Hey, you know, man, I was thinking, just let it go.
We don't we don't get to hang out that much anymore.
I was thinking we'd have a movie night and then you
then you kind of show him what's up and then he'll realize it on his own.
You don't have to bully him.
Although he's going to, he looks like he's going to jail.
He'll get bullied there a hundred percent.
The second he walks in, you think there aren't going to be comments.
Speaking of that, did you, did you watch this like quick Twitter video?
I show it's it's it's LA riots, I think.
And some guy like takes a swing at one of the cops and then all of them open up on
him with pepper balls and shit, but then a random person from the crowd, a civilian comes in with the Goldberg Stunner,
like fucking spears him to the ground. And then the cops seemingly are like, he's with
us, don't hurt him. And they just whooped the shit out of the initial like assault. It's
great.
The one on X alerts. So I'm clicking all your links.
Yeah, that's it.
So I have not paid attention to anything in the news lately
The LA riots like it's it seems it seems pretty insane. So is this is because of
the ice ice ice immigration raids and all that stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's I remember like months ago reading on reddit
There was this post that was like LAPD can handle one
Riot with 10,000 people but they kept they'll absolutely fold to 10 riots of 1,000 people
And that just kept getting pushed around and I saw it shared a lot and then that's kind of what's happening
Last week. I don't know if nothing's happening right now. I don't know. I keep looking around for like live stuff
There's so much National Guard and and military presence there now. I don't think anything's gonna happen because he's
Trump sent troops to LA and you know
The governor of LA doesn't want the troops and I think he's suing because he's saying that Trump can't send troops that he doesn't
Want but I think the Texas governor said he wanted troops and they sent troops
So it's it's really interesting because it's not just LA now. It's it's all over the country. There's a anti-ice
Demonstrations protests rallies and I think it's all peaceful. There's one Atlanta. I haven't heard anything too bad
I don't think there's a mostly peaceful. Is it you know, just, you know, fire, mostly peaceful. One of those.
I only saw fires in LA. Um, but,
but I haven't been like hard Seattle and I know they're in St.
Louis and you know, all the major cities, but the LA ones have been wild.
Like, like, yeah, they, uh, those Waymo's I'd never heard of a Waymo,
but apparently that's an electric car that you driverless cars,
you have driverless electric car that you can just have delivered somewhere.
And they just kept calling new ones and burning them.
Why would they keep sending them?
Because it's automated.
There's no people in the loop.
So, okay.
So is this, this is just an Uber service?
A driverless Uber.
Dude, they have been
playing these three I heard burning famous on a loop like everywhere you go
it is the wallpaper for every car just good every time a trash can burns 12
cameras go in like look at this out of control I've seen a lot of videos of the
the rock throwing at cops and stuff. Oh, that's getting circulated.
Yeah.
That's like attempted murder.
Yeah, it's so crazy, man.
I get the protests.
I understand where people are coming from.
Totally get that.
Once you start burning your own neighborhoods down and then pretend like, oh, the, you know, the, the powers that be, aren't going to send more people and more
troops and more, you know, more of their authority to subdue that.
It doesn't make any sense to me.
Um, so the governor, who is this Gavin Newsom, he's like, Oh, Trump, we don't,
we don't need this.
It's like, meanwhile, the city's burning behind them.
Uh, yeah, I feel like, I feel like like that's a little that's a little really stupid.
So, yeah, yeah.
It played right into like in my opinion, like like he couldn't have planned this better.
I'm sure there will be like the people in the far, far like fringy left
who are like Trump sent agitators in because that's often
what's said whenever there's something like this.
And it makes your team look bad that the other team sent agitators in or they were paid to do this or they were
actually federal agents or something like that.
But it looks like a gigantic organic riot to me.
I was watching last night or maybe the night before and it's just this sea of people walking
through the streets.
Everybody's come out for the show.
It's hard to find a good live stream that's like down on crowd level though.
That's what I, that's what I really wanna watch
is some dude like in the crowd throwing bottles.
I feel so bad.
Every time you see my scene
makes it look like nothing's happening.
Like, oh, I missed it.
Every time I look live, I missed it.
I just see the way Mo's burning on a loop.
Oh, I just find like the highlight clips on Twitter.
Like I imagine if you sit there and like watch an actual live feed,
it's going to be like, all right, well, for 30 minutes now,
looks like there's a bunch of annoying people here that I wouldn't get along with,
but they're not doing bubbles at the police. Yeah.
Where's the other one? Ah, OK.
I just found the live stream of the rock throwing guys.
They threw like eight rocks and then they got arrested.
OK, where's the other ones?
It really told them down after down after like maybe the third day or something like that.
I haven't seen any of the crazy things.
The third day.
You know, week one was the most of it.
You know, that was the worst part.
Because, you know, that's when they started like when there's nothing left to burn.
Yeah, right about the time Trump tweeted that the National Guard was going to
down. Like we're just making shit up.
He's joking around like,
no, a LA left. Yeah. It's like the LA fires.
You thought that like everything was completely, you know,
down to ash and turns out like there's still a lot of LA still fine.
You know, and the idiots always go to the Apple store and rob it blind,
but Apple just turns those items off.
Now they screech,
are stolen and you just see piles of them left in the street because it's
screaming, I'm stolen, arrest me.
And that's going to be rough.
That's going to be a rough day for the looters when they figure out that
technology for TVs.
Oh, no.
Fuck, my brand new 78 inch Samsung is yelling
that I'm a thief and I can't even watch sports.
Also, TVs are probably the,
maybe that's a vestige of a bygone era
because back in the day when people were riding,
they would take TVs or something
because TVs were
expensive. Now you can buy like a flat screen HDTV for like
$75 in Walmart, like it won't be the best quality, but you can you
can get it like what what would be the point of carrying around
this this giant picnic table? And then like for what like 600
bucks?
Yeah, you're just you're just carrying a stronger and saved as
a penny earned?
If I were going to loot, I don't know where I'd pick number. Like it's almost
a Jordan store. No, because like,
like you could only loot where other people were already looting.
Like you couldn't go start up.
Like if they're looting the Apple store and across the street, there's like a fucking REI.
You can't run in there and start stealing tents because the cops are going to be
like, that's nonsense. That's a, that's a bananas over there at Apple store.
Let's get the one guy or ship. You're like, all right guys, let's get the crab shack.
No, it's the best thing to loot. I've got just satchels full of living crabs.
I'm like bending over to pick up what the escapees off the street and they're falling
out.
That's what they call asymmetric warfare.
That would be like a meat like I'm getting bullied by the real looters.
They're calling me gay because I'm stealing crabs.
What is it in the Allways Sunny?
Like we're crab people now?
Yeah, we're crab people.
Delaware River runoff crabs.
Legally we have to throw the babies back.
As if there's any legality there.
You can't eat the barnacles.
If you guys were like, if you were in LA, went in Rome, as they say,
where would you have the most fun looting? If you were deciding to go all in? Look, if they were
riding on Rodeo Drive, they would have sent the Marine Corps in by now, but that's where you want
it. That's where you want to go. That's where all the expensive shit is. That's where you can get a
$6,000 fucking sweater. That's where you want want to that's where you want to loot and riot.
What is Rodeo?
Me and it's like a spelled rodeo, but Rodeo Drive is like this one little strip.
And there's there's a bunch of high end stores and there's and nice cars.
If you want to go by car watching in L.A., like like some of the hotels,
obviously, are good places to go.
But like Rodeo Drive, you're going you're going to see Ferraris and
Lambos parked on the side of the street.
Well, that seems like the right answer then.
You go in. Yeah, but you'll see real quick.
You'll see real quick who, you know, who has protection and who doesn't.
So if you go to the, you know, poor neighborhoods, middle class neighborhoods,
nobody gives a shit.
But if you go to the upper class where, you know, the
gated communities and whatnot, they tend to have armed security.
They tend to have have their, you know, their stuff on lock.
So there's a reason why none of these riots happened over there.
And it's probably because a few people got, you know, got their shit rocked.
So yeah, I do.
We answer the where would you go?
Where they died doesn't appeal to me like overpriced wallets and shit like it doesn't what do you mean?
But you're stealing them. You're stealing them to resell them later
Yeah
Keeping them for yourself like
That me makes a difference because in my head I'm like can I get away with this crime because I would definitely go to a car
Dealership I go to like a BMW dealership. They've got something dope. I'm sure
I go to like a BMW dealership. They've got something dope.
I'm sure you can only get one.
I'm a bit of a rule breaker in this.
The first time you get pulled over, you're getting tied to a massive crime.
Right away.
Damn.
License and registration.
If it's a crime I need to get away with, then that changes the scenario a bit some more.
I don't know what I take. What about stealing people? Those are worth a lot, right?
That's true. No, it turns out they cost a lot. The maintenance and upkeep on people is awful.
Yeah, but that's only if you intend to keep them around for a while. Yeah, you sell them to some Saudi guy or like just cut out there
Cut out their kidneys China need loves buying organs and stuff
I mean, you probably need organs everywhere
So like we could find what you can go with China of all countries where they have a billion people
Where I would think I would think like a low population country would probably have a better organ price
Don't you think they want powerful Western livers?
Yeah, they want a nice Irish liver that's been processing alcohol for thousands
of years. It's technology. They can't match. How do they do it? Yeah, no, I think I think
you're actually right. I think what I was misremembering is that China has a big organ harvesting like I guess not
organization because I'm sure it's like you know popping up here and there not
like one overarching thing but yeah they like kill poor people and take their
organs I heard it on a podcast years ago can't remember
true Joe Rogan said it so it's fine yeah yeah it was probably some fucking guy
on Joe Rogan I tried they harvest's fine. Yeah, it was probably some fucking guy on Joe Rogan. I heard they harvest prisoners from Oregon, or uh, organs from prisoners.
We should do that here. Why aren't we doing that? Like that could get your time off your,
like you're doing like three to ten years. What would a kidney buy you?
You know what organs I would want from prisoners? I'd be like, I want that guy's lats.
I want that guy's lats. That guy's been grinding hard.
It's like, give me that big beefy Nazi's lats and you just kill him at the end.
Whatever.
Does it come with a tattoo?
SS tattoos on both shoulders.
I'm like, I didn't make this decision guys.
I got this from a Nazi organ harvester.
I'm not a bad guy.
Well, we got six years off.
Avoid your 60 days.
I ain't giving them nothing for 60 days.
I keep on and sperm sample.
Come on, get creative.
Sperm. Yeah, OK.
Yeah, I don't know.
You're going to pay me for that.
No, I have to do is come earn it.
Huh? What about the tip of your finger?
Like, like, what are your fingers?
No, I'm not cutting anything
off like not even like a like a johnny depp tip like you know something like you know like that
oh it's not too bad i can't have anything i'm keeping all of me i can have some like fingernail
shavings or something like right hair not yeah what if they shaved off all of your hair yeah all
of your hair but they made you look like intentionally ridiculous for the time that you had to serve
right they shaved like a bullseye hairstyle on you oh no you have to keep it by law oh no
they just got worse i'm just gonna do the time it wasn't it's not that bad they give you like a
castanza but poorly so there's still like visible stubble where you should have hair.
Yeah, it makes you look crazy. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, I'm good on that.
I don't think I'd get look good with a shaved head either.
I got some scars up there.
I bet it's all it's all like meaty and misshapen.
You never know.
But the question is, what if they were like,
you can have this giant Nazi's delts or his biceps or his
some giant muscle group and there's the technology that can do it seamlessly.
Okay. I'd make that deal and I'd end up with like a black guy's delts and they
wouldn't match, you know? You'd have to pick someone of the same race or
otherwise you would look like... I'd wake up from surgery and they'd pull the
switcheroo on me. I'm not taking this deal no I don't know if I had blood diseases though I
have black if I had black delts would I look silly that's the only part of my body that's black
everyone thinks I have a horrible like skin condition Woody Woody, why is he dick black? I want to talk about it.
What it's got wasn't in the boondocks or revitaligo.
That show is so fucking funny.
I want you part of it.
No, I would do it. Maybe. Depends how scary it would be.
Blackdale depends on what you're in there for.
You know, I would I wouldn't take I would make sure that it was someone with close enough skin tone that it would be like that.
Those are obviously his lats.
You got to look like Frankenstein when they're done.
Nah, they could do it.
We can go to the, we can almost go to the moon again, Kyle.
We can do this.
Oh, that's so that's Trump cut the NASA budget.
We're not going anywhere.
Oh, no sooner than 2025. Yeah, no sooner than 2050.
You imagine the laughing in NASA when they sent that message out.
We read this a while ago, Freddie, where we were talking like, why the fuck don't they
do some more cool shit with the moon?
They haven't done it in forever.
And we found a like a PR statement from NASA.
This is probably 2022, 2023, when we talked about this on the show.
And they said they're like, we're going back to the moon, brother.
Believe you me.
No sooner than 2025, though,
no, because there's a lot of things to iron out.
Now, if this is something we had done 60 years ago,
I would understand your confusion here.
But this is brand new.
You know, we just can't figure it out.
It's like, come on, good. Get it done. We don't have the rocket to do it right
now. Like, like the Saturn five rocket got retired. They don't make them anymore.
Can do they know how to make it like they've they saved all the paperwork,
right?
They're going to use Elon's shit if they go back and they'll use his dragon
starship thing. He's got not anymore.
He's angry.
He went back on that.
He look, look, tweet.
He's honest, like a 14 year old girl on Twitter.
All right.
He's flip flopped on that and apologized to the president.
All right.
No word.
What do you think Trump told him?
Trump must have told him something.
I bet it was.
There's I bet Trump had people reach out to him and calm him down.
It was just 13 baby mamas.
I would think that was it.
And I also like, I saw the posts from Trump referencing it
and they were almost like crafted in a way
to make Elon feel small.
Like Elon is going hard at Trump.
This is last week, which in modern politics
is ancient history now.
And like Trump was saying
something like, sounds like he's going through a rough time. Feel bad for the guy. And like,
that was about it. And it's like, you know, Elon saw that and he's like, no, I'm a bigger part of
your life. You can't blow me off. I'm a big deal. They asked Trump, do you think Elon was doing
drugs in the White House? I don't know. I hope not. I wish you the best.
You know, it sounds so noncommittal.
And like it honestly, it just when Trump seems like the reasonable one,
like, wow, like that's that is crazy.
You've lost. You've lost. Yeah.
You have absolutely lost.
You know, you know, it's OK.
So I'm not I'm not the biggest Trump supporter here.
But like I went to the Daytona 500 and they like before the race starts,
everybody can sort of if you have a VIP pass, you can go on to the the track itself. So it's like
this crazy bank track and you can walk up and you can go to the pits and you can see everything and
people are setting up and they have these like before race shows. So Pitbull was there and they're doing all the announcing.
And when we were like standing on the bank track,
we see Air Force One just do a slow pass
over the entire like field and everybody,
there's 120,000 people there and everybody goes nuts.
Like yeah, and it just like dips its wing a little bit, you know,
and then does another pass and then it lands at like a,
an airport that's less than a mile away.
And then Trump shows up with, with the beast.
So he has two of those cars, which is like this big limo that's on a,
like a pickup truck chassis. It's super fortified.
Like this thing could withstand a nuclear war. Like it's, it pickup truck chassis. It's super fortified.
This thing could withstand a nuclear war.
It's pretty crazy.
So he shows up.
And this is right when they do the driver start your engines.
So I think it was like Anthony Mackie,
he was doing some promotion for the Captain America movie.
So it's like, driver, start your engines.
And then once the engine started,
Trump goes out onto the field in the beast and he leads 40 stock cars and does three laps around.
And then, yeah, so he does that. And while that's happening, they have the Thunderbirds, which are like F-16s, flying over with their afterburners.
And they're playing ACDC
I Shit you not it was listen. I don't care how much you hate the president. That's the coolest fucking thing
I've ever seen in my life. It's a hundred thousand people going nuts and like
It was so crazy like you can you get I get goosebumps just thinking about it. And I'm there like, you
know, I'm within, I don't know, 10 feet of this car, you know,
and the president when he gets out. And it's it's really,
really cool. Yeah, he came out. He shook hands with some
veterans and some some NASCAR guys thought the Confederate
War. That's it. Yeah, he's still fighting. Yeah. Yeah, it's a war of 1812 veteran. Yes
So no, but it was like everybody there just felt hopeful and they felt like they're a part of something like uniquely
American like this would not happen
Anywhere in Europe anywhere like across the across the world. It can only happen here. It's
So cool, yeah, so across the world, it can only happen here. It's look at that. Look at that. That's so cool.
That is like what I said. No, he just takes out people in the top. I can't see days.
But like afterwards, I, you know, on Twitter, people, oh it's a it's a waste of money to bring Air Force One anywhere
Because when you bring Air Force One, you have to bring this entourage blah blah
It's costing people eight million dollars an hour the taxpayer blah blah
And I'm like if you were there you wouldn't say shit because like holy shit
like it was it was the the coolest thing I've ever been a part of. And it's like, you know what?
I get it.
Like he knows his audience.
He knows that at the Daytona 500, there probably aren't going to be a lot of like CNN viewers.
And he's like, you know, he was the guy.
So yeah, that was my little Daytona 500 story.
That sounds like a lot of fun.
The part of your story where you said and ACDC is blaring just did it pretty well. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which is funny because it's
not an American band, but yeah. But it's so, you know, it's so on vibe for that sort of
event. Yeah. Yeah. That one. He's an absolutely impeccable showman.
He knows how to put on a show and he knows how to,
you know, like take advantage of an opportunity clearly.
Like when he got shot and he's immediately pumping the fist,
it's like, man, that's such a great propaganda image.
It's just, it's just,
This is a marketing opportunity.
It's tailor made, it's perfect with the flag.
I mean, that one, I think that won him the election.
If not, like, I mean, that and the Rogan the Rogan interview,
I think one of the election.
Yeah, yeah, those things definitely contributed.
I agree 100 percent.
And they happened right there at the end.
It was it was it was like perfect timing.
It was like as we're coming down to the wire,
and Kamala was doing like a standard political thing, like
you know, just what you're supposed to do according to
American politics and Trump was getting shot and
that in my memory was like July.
Yeah, it was it was towards the end. So he got shot. And then
he did an interview and then Vance did an interview and
Vance's interview with Rogan. He did got shot and then he did an interview and then Vance did an interview and Vance's interview
with Rogan. He did Rogan and then Theo von and some some what
he did the what's the the flake? Did you do flagrant? Or?
July? Yeah, so
interview was was later too.
Yeah. But it was it was him three hours uninterrupted. He
didn't get up to piss. Like it was you could tell that it was him three hours uninterrupted. He didn't get up to piss like it was.
You could tell that it was just him and his brain.
And this is what I'm glad you said that.
So so then so the left is currently saying that Trump has a catheter and the
right is currently saying that Trump has a hog because when he was at the UFC
fights last week, Kayla Harrison strapped her belt on Trump. And he sort of like posed for
the picture with the belt and it made his pants a little tighter than they would normally be.
Right. And it looks like he's got a hog coming down his fucking inner thigh. And so again,
the left catheter, pissy pants Trump and the right like, my God, Trump is hung.
Look at that. Look at the biggest
one I've ever seen. These are the important issues that we
really need to delve deep figure out the truth here. It's a
probably a shadow on the pants. Yeah. Enhance enhance. There's
something going on. If the picture is not doctored, I'll
find the picture. Oh, it's gonna be done. It's If the pictures that doctor, I'll find the picture.
I Oh, it's gonna be done. It's like the pictures of AOC. Oh, Lincoln. And then then you believe she wore this? Like,
yeah, that's because it's photoshopped. Yeah. Yeah.
AOC. She's getting out there. She is pictures. Just trying to be
president. Oh, Kyle with his gosh darn error messages.
Yeah, you know, the Secret Service keeps giving
him that same error.
Honestly, it's a popularity contest, right?
The president, it used to be there's some sort of reverence and now it's just like a
complete shit show circus.
And it's whoever, you know, like now they're talking about,
like look how big Trump's dick is.
Like that's, that's insane.
That's really stupid.
That's really, can we all agree that that's dumb?
That's like a really dumb level of argumentation.
That's pretty.
I mean, it's nothing.
Oh, look at, he seems pleased with himself.
Like Kayla Harris, she's never seen one that big. I'll leave that lady's a monster.
She had one. I think Kyle,
would you let her fuck you?
I mean, yeah, choice.
I mean, yeah, she's she gets what she wants.
You know, nothing I can do about it.
She's so big.
She she she she won the 135 pound championship that night.
And a different guy, Marab, he defended the 135 men's
championship.
So they weigh in at the same weight.
And afterwards, they're backstage.
And she's like, oh, you've got a belt, and I've got a belt.
We'll get a picture together.
And they're just really happy for each other.
She's bigger than him.
She's taller than him. It's crazy. She cuts so much weight. She cuts so much
weight. She always looks like death. The days leading up to
her fights, but that is a big bitch. She's so big.
So I always think about you know, it's the the 100 guys
versus a bear. And you know, I always think about if you have a
gorilla, right? Like, if you have a gorilla, right?
If you have a UFC fighter, a female UFC fighter,
at the top of her game, what does it take for a normal guy?
What does it look like for him to beat her in battle?
Does he have to be twice her weight?
Or if you just take him off the street, he
doesn't have any sort of technique or anything. It's
just sheer size and stamina or you know, whatever God gave him.
What does that? What does that look like?
She probably fucks up an average guy like a literally average
guy. Like if we're talking about five foot nine, doesn't work out
has a job guy, she kills that guy. But if you're talking about
like tough guy at the bar, they all annihilate her.
Because I always think about this, and I don't know if I've talked
about this on other podcasts, but like the, the Charlize Theron
movies where you know, she's, she's kicking people and, and,
you know, they're flying across the room. And it's like she's
like 110 pounds. And that guy that looks like a like he was a reject from
the Secret Service. He's like six foot five and like 260. If he
really like if he cocked back and hit her as hard as he could,
her head would come off. Like it just it doesn't make any sense.
Yeah, yeah, she would like she would be brain dead immediately.
I get that.
Let's talk about we talked about this a lot and I always land in the same place.
I don't like it when the story describes this woman as just a highly trained
woman like, oh, she's ex CIA.
She's she's a Green Beret Army Ranger ass kicker girl.
Like, I don't cut it.
I don't cut it.
There's some physics involved, but I'm happy to go along if you say she's half elf, if you say she's got some fucking
biomimetic gel that she rubs on herself every day, if she was cursed by an ancient like
genie lamp or something, any of that.
Super soldier serum, yeah.
Sure, any of that.
I'll buy it.
I'll get on board.
I'll believe in your bullshit.
But if you try to base your thing in the world
that I live in and you tell me that 120 pound women
beat up 200 pound trained men,
then I'm just like, no, no they don't.
No they don't.
There's some math problems.
If it's Wonder Woman it's fine.
I'm trying to answer his question in my head.
And I'm like, I'm trying to use an actor, right?
Let's pretend all actors are untrained.
I know a lot of them have some training.
Let's throw that away.
What does the actor look like who beats her? Right. Vin Diesel. I think he beats her.
Right. So let's go a little down. Matt Damon. I think she beats Matt Damon.
You know, which Matt Damon is he Jack? Yeah, I don't like the Martian Matt Damon.
How tall is he? He's Jason Bourne, dude.
It doesn't matter.
He could be four foot nothing.
I choose to believe that Jason Bourne can throw a punch and that he can beat up Kayla Harrison.
Maybe not now because he's older.
I specifically said I'm trained.
Okay, I know.
Keanu Reeves is pretty highly trained.
If we throw that all away and you took a regular person in Keanu Reeves body,
she probably beats him up. I think she wins. I think she's got Keanu,
but I don't think she has been Affleck. I think Ben Affleck beats her.
He's a big guy. Post-Batman. Yeah.
Marky Mark fucks her up. Oh yeah. Yeah. And he's only five eight.
If he didn't, he doesn't even know about the fight. He just,
he just doesn't like women.
I'm not even sure about Marky Mark.
Like again, untrained version, right? You know, we're just doing the,
the what Marky Mark is. He's jacked. Yeah. He's jacked.
Mark Wahlberg is big. Yeah. Kayla.
I bet Kayla Harrison bench presses 200 pounds. I bet Mark Wahlberg,
I bet he's much stronger than that. Like he looks, I don't know, I haven't looked at his
Instagram lately, but like three years ago when he was training for fucking Transformers 27 or
whatever, he was big. I don't know. And he also hate crime that got that Asian guy that time,
which again, we're trying to throw away all fighting skill. I got that. That's that's more about the dog in it.
OK, OK.
And in that case, what about what about like really big dudes
like the guy who he'll in in Breaking Bad?
Like, I know he's is he is he dead or what?
I feel the fact that the earthquake or whatever.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Right. Landslide or whatever.
Landslide. Yeah.
Is he the overweight black guy?
Yeah. With the pointy head.
Yeah, that guy loses.
He doesn't have any cardio at all.
That guy gets boyed.
But that wouldn't matter.
Oh, cardio doesn't matter in fighting, tell me more.
No, no, no, I'm not saying it doesn't matter,
but if he does something and he uses his weight
to his advantage and snaps her leg in two, that's it.
I don't think he knows how to do that though.
No. Just fall.
I'm with Woody on this one.
That guy is obese, or at least last time I saw him he was.
I know he has lost weight and since they had to put that fat suit on him for a better call
Saul I believe.
I know he's lost a significant amount but he looks like handicapped to me.
Kayla Harrison is a two-time gold medalist in judo.
Okay.
And I just think she'll fuck him up.
Yeah you are completely right because I don't want to fight Kayla Harrison.
I think if Kayla Harrison fought to the death, then I probably die. I think that I die at
a 10 times. It's what I always say I'd instantly like launch a charm offensive ask her why
we're really doing this. Use your skills. I got it. There's no sand to throw into her
eyes. Then I'm in so much trouble.
Yeah. I mean, like I was saying was a real thing. I probably said this before, but I read about this.
Like, what country was it?
It was in Portugal. I think it was a Portuguese Fencing champion from like the 15 or 1600s.
Okay.
And he wrote a book on the art of sword fighting and how he won all these these these many
duels that he'd had and pocket sand was the primary thing. He
kept a bag of sand on his belt and in the sword fight, he's
constantly throwing sand in his opponent's eyes. That can't be
true. I had fencing in high school and sand would not go through the
mask that they were wearing. They didn't wear masks! These were swordfights to the death.
Was it fencing 101? No, these were rules to the death.
Oh okay, okay. I'm all wrong then. That makes more sense. They're fencing rules to the death?
All right, not in the Olympics they aren't, but in his time they were but it was it was all about more pocket sand. So I I'm a
big proponent of pocket sand. I believe that I could defeat
kill Harrison if I had my satchel of pocket sand, but I
would not want to fight her big scary Olympic champion ass and
under any other circumstances. She's so big and scary.
All right. Last last hypothetical it's her versus
boogie with pocket sand. She kills him big and scary. All right, last hypothetical. It's her versus Boogie with pocket sand.
She kills him.
She kills him.
Oh yeah.
I don't know, his sand skills are pretty quick.
At least they get wings.
Give her a competitor.
Give her an underfeed athlete.
Wings and Boogie with pocket sand.
You'd give them a leaf blower that auto feeds sand
and it wouldn't matter.
Those guys, when you're big and like, I don't know, your cardio is bad and your hips are bad, like
you probably don't want to fight an Olympic champion of anything.
And I watched her destroy that woman the other night.
It wasn't close.
It was mean.
She's great.
I think I look forward to it.
She'll fight Amanda Nunez now.
And that's like your women's super fight.
A lot of people consider Amanda Nunez as their goat. I guess I do. I can't think of any other women that are up there and have accomplished when she decks Chris Cyborg
When she had annihilated her Oh God, that was a wonderful night
Just just just just overhand right after overhand right it was and her performance was just as dominant against Rhonda Rousey. Oh and
Everybody everybody Rhonda Rousey also an Olympian everybody, everybody. Rhonda Rousey, also an Olympian.
I think, but I'm not sure.
Yeah, I think you're right about that.
So when you guys talk about an athlete or a fighter
or something like that, it seems like you gravitate
to one or the other.
What do you got?
Because I'm not into sports or any of that,
but I want to know what do you find, what qualities do you got? Because I'm not I'm not into sports or any of that. But like, I want to know, like, what do you find? Like, what qualities do you find in a person that you'd be like, oh, yeah, this is this is my person? Is it like an underdog thing? Is it, you know, like, just like skill technique?
University of Georgia had a quarterback a couple years ago who like he like sort of believed in himself and he went and played like lower levels of ball so he could start
and prove himself until he earned his right to get on the team.
So that he's playing fucking college football at 25, 26 or something like that by the end.
But I kind of like that.
And I just like a winner.
I like people who are the best at whatever they do, whether it's that you see those, those Japanese markets where they're slicing the tuna and those guys
are like perfect with those crazy samurai sword blades.
And this video is rock. When I'm stoned, those are great.
You just see street food vendors making scrambled egg sandwiches in Korea. Like I'm into that.
But then when I see Tom Brady, who wins like all those super bowls and, and it has that
crazy lineage of greatness where it's like
It's not a fluke when you do it six fucking times and they like I'm currently rewatching
the Jordan documentary the
What's what's it called? It's it's great. It's third. It's not called the house money
It's like last dance.
Last dance. Oh my god. Last dance is so inspiring and and just I have a different take. I'm not about winners. I'm again. I'm about triers. I like the heart. The like the refuses to quit the dog. Like I like Alex Caruso. He's a basketball player. You guys probably don't know him. He's not a star. But good golly,
that guy harasses you playing defense from one net to the
other. There is not a free inch on that guy. He's not the
biggest. He's not the strongest. He's not the fastest, but he
often gets the toughest defensive assignments because he
is relentless. That's the kind of guy like Luke Richardson was
a hockey player for the Flyers ages ago. And he was another one.
Oh, the the Philly fans loved him.
They chained Luke because when two guys go into the corner, he comes out with the puck.
He was never a leading scorer.
He was never in the conversation for leading scorer even on his team, let alone the league.
But my goodness, no one tried harder.
No one skated full speed every time they touched the ice,
every time like he did.
Joe Lozan, Joe Lozan's a UFC fighter.
And he had a couple of fights where he got really bloody
to the point where he couldn't see anymore
these forehead cuts.
Didn't bother him.
Just fucking spit the blood out to the side.
He made the octagon so bloody,
they wrapped it up and mailed it to him afterwards.
He has it in his gym, just hanging on the wall. It's all Lowe's on. That stinks.
And there's a bunch of examples. Oh, oh, Donald Cerrone, right? He had this fight against Nate
Diaz. Both of them went in there thinking that they were the alpha, right? They both just,
to each of them, it was ludicrous that the other guy thought they had a chance two rounds in
clearly Nate Diaz is winning this thing. Nate Nate's got it.
And anyone else would come into the third round and be like, I
don't want to and Nate Diaz gives him double fingers and
Cowboys like, yeah, you got a point, but I'm not done yet.
And he lost, but it was the heart.
It was the heart that that made the one my fandom of Cowboys.
Roni, that's what I look for.
They don't have to be great.
They just have to try harder than anyone else.
Do you remember in 2004 and the the thing was in the playoffs
and the World Series, Kirk Schilling came out after the foot
surgery leading through the stock
Ah, ah, I watched that whole I watched the whole playoff series for the Yankees
I watched the whole World Series that that was such an amazing like time for baseball watching the Red Sox come back
It was one it was like something from a movie how it was maybe
Ninth inning and it's like down to their last out and their last pitch and David Ortiz hit that home run
And they rallied and won and they came back and beat the Yankees all those game chilling
Pitching on like little rest after a surgery
They've just stapled the fucking tendon to his bone or something to get so that he could move that fucking foot right?
I was just told under and I have a surgery on his ankle
They opened him up and did a surgery and then he played like two days later and it's oh, I mistakenly
thought you meant that he had a toe injury and I was like, wow,
surgery and a bad toe injury.
I might not be well informed, but I've always thought baseball
doesn't get to participate in the heart conversations and
Curt Schilling's alley was like the epitome of that. Oh my god,
you don't get it. You don't get it. He had like a fresh cut and through the sock you could see
dribbles of blood. Meanwhile, hockey players were out there with broken bones and missing teeth from
14 minutes earlier. They're going back. It is always so funny post hockey playoffs. People will
be like, you know, it seems like Leon Dreisaitles, just not his normal self in this series. Is it laziness, lack of work
ethic, and then the team will release something after the series and be like,
he had three broken ribs and you couldn't tell because he was wearing
gloves, but two of the fingers on his left hand were taped together because
they were both broken. And he figured I can kind of pass this way. Like, uh,
it is funny, like the, like it's UFC and hockey as far as the intensity of injuries and I like I mean I like I mean, I'm a st. Louis Blues fan
So if they play for the Blues, I like them unless they suck and then I hate them but
the way I like the players that like get brutalized and then just
Handle it in a way that I know I'm way too bitch made to. I'd be like,
ow, ow, ow, ow, I want to go to the locker room, this sucks. But like, like Mark Mathot, he was
a defenseman for the Ottawa Senators, and this is years ago, and Sidney Crosby, people who don't
even know hockey know who he is, he slashed Mark Mathot in the hand with his stick. And Mark,
with his gloves, was like, ah, rats, son of a gun.
And I was like, oh man, that must have really smarted.
And he took his glove off on the way back to the bench
and he had chopped the end of his ring finger off.
Holy.
With the slash.
And so they had to sew the tip of his finger back on
and they were, and like hockey's the only sport
where they're like, ah, geez, that's a lot of blood.
Glad the cameraman turned away.
It looks like, I would put it on the bench as saying
that his finger's hanging off a bit of blood. Glad the cameraman turned away. It looks like I would put it on the bench as saying that his fingers hanging off
a bit of flesh. That's iffy. It's, what do you,
what do you think the chances are him coming back into this game?
And then the analyst is like, ah, I mean, I would say easily 50 50.
And he did get back and they sort of back on and he came back out.
A football player did that too. Yeah. Yeah.
Football's cool with that as well.
I like when they get because people bully professional athletes for like,
you play a game and you make millions of dollars and it's like, OK, come on.
They're providing more value than that.
You know, if no one cared, they wouldn't be making any money at all.
But the ones who like put it on the line, that's that's cool.
When it's like they're clearly they're clearly your fire.
I like that. And just greatness.
Like I have no connection to the Edmonton Oilers,
but I want them to win the Stanley Cup over Florida this year because, number one,
Florida won last year. I don't like repeats.
And number two, like Connor McDavid is the best player since fucking Mario Lemieux.
And so it's frustrating to like always see that as like, oh, you know, he's great,
but he doesn't have a cup yet.
And it's like, just get him the cup.
Come on, come on, Edmonton, get it together.
You're playing tonight and I can't even watch the game.
So, you know, you know, it's funny, like whatever, whatever you just said in the
last last minute, um, you could have made a hundred percent of that up and I'd be
like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that sounds, that sounds exactly like, yeah, yeah.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
So like, I love the, you know, what. Yeah. So like I. Well, fan as well.
Yeah, I love it.
I love the you know, what does he need a finger to play hockey for though?
Yeah, you have to hold the time.
You always using it to hold your stick to pass to shoot.
Just take the stick to his hand.
I'm talking about a pitcher who's lost his foot.
He's like the quarterback.
He's what I could have sworn I saw his foot right there.
Yeah, I'm not.
I'll surgically put together. I'm not bullying. I'm could have sworn I saw his foot right there. Yeah, I'm not. He was all surgically put together.
I'm not bullying. I'm not bullying Curt Schilling.
I'm sure it was a real alley, man.
I want to see.
I got paid millions of dollars.
Put that shot in the Hall of Fame.
That shot's in the Hall of Fame.
Your guy's glove got thrown in a fucking dirty old box.
That's crazy, dude.
If they had to like put every bit of bloody equipment
up in the Hockey Hall of Fame. It would look like a holocaust museum.
Oh, oh my. It would be just covered wall to wall in horror. Yeah. A room full of shoes.
Dude. So, so do you, do you guys? Wait, wait, wait. Don't change topics yet. I want to see the sock.
Yeah, I want to see. Zach, please put the sock up. Look at look at look at dirty sock on google. Yeah. Look at what this man powered through. That's hilarious.
Do you know that I literally me personally uh I have had more blood on my socks after hockey games
than that because I had shitty escapes. It's not the amount of blood or the size of the cut. It is a surgical incision.
His tendon that's allowing him to move his foot is put together
with fucking glue and hope and he won the game. It was the 2006
championship series. Everything was on the line and he came back
and won and pitch 2006. Yeah. Yeah. Didn't the cards win
doesn't say 2004 2004 2004. It says 2004. Yeah. So
apparently the bloody socks sold for
$92,613 at auction. I don't know about you. I feel like I would spend like that money on something else, you know
I get a brand not
Sydney Sweeney, yeah
Well, I was going to the other one. Belle Delphine sold her bathwater.
So it's not for $92,000.
I bet she could get $92,000 for a whole tub.
I feel like after you got the first first vial,
the rest is just why would you want that?
Why would you want that?
Why wouldn't you? You know, what am I going to do with it?
I know what they did with it, but like, why would I want that?
Yeah. Why would I have, I,
I wouldn't trade that for the one piece of sports memorabilia I have in this
room, which is a game used Ray Bork stick signed fucking sick,
by the way, if you know anything about hockey, uh, Ray Bork,
Woody knows who Ray Bork is. So he's a real guy. I'm not making them up, Freddie.
He's a real guy. No, no, no. Yeah, he's my favorite.
He was alter ego. He's a trader who switched teams so he could
get a free cup after his time had passed. I mean, mayhaps.
That's what he did. The Bruins weren't doing it for a man. He
had to switch in Colorado. They were hot. They had Forsberg.
They had Sackick. Why would you not join that team? Adam
Foot, all those guys, Patrick Waugh.
So those qualities that you guys like in these people, is that like projection from like
stuff that you see in yourselves or stuff that you want to see in yourselves?
Because I know Kyle, you said, you know, I want a winner.
I want somebody who's like, yeah, this lineage of people behind them and stuff like that.
I mean, is that how you want yourself to be portrayed?
No.
Okay.
No.
I just like the guys who do things that no one's ever done before.
They've got this entire system that pays people millions of dollars and reigns pussy and fame
on them if you can throw a ball good.
Everybody wants to throw the ball good. There's kids out there right now training at three, four, five years old to throw
that ball good.
And that entire system feeds all the way up to the majors and then up to these
championship games.
So it's all that feeding to just get the best of the best of the best to go
against each other.
And then you've got one guy who can seemingly just win the whole thing a
third of the time. I like that greatness. It's like he's everyone's trying as hard as they can. No one
everyone's coming in for that second practice. Everyone's eating right. Everyone has a nutritionist.
There's no like easy way to get an edge over anybody. So when someone does like that's
fascinating to me. That's something I like to watch. What do you think Taylor? Did you pick the
attributes of your of what you look for in an athlete because that's who you'd aspire to be? I think selfishly it's
just because that's what makes the game the most entertaining to me is like I want the absolute
best players on the ice because that's the most fun. Like when the blues play Edmonton, I get a
little excited and I'm like, I get to watch Connor McDavid tonight and every player in the NHL is
incredible to Kyle's point.
Like these guys are like distilled, like none of them suck.
They're all the worst guy in these professional leagues is going to roll.
Even the best guy in like European leagues or South American, whatever, whatever it is.
But I want to see greatness.
That's cool. And when there's like a huge amount of leadership, as far as
overcoming a bad injury, that's also sick.
Like, towards the end of, pardon me, the Blues Stanley Cup run think it was Colton Pereyko, our six foot seven defenseman,
and hit him in the face, shattered his jaw, and they had to wire his mouth shut. And it was like
an up in the air thing. Like, is he going to play in game seven? Is he going to play in game seven
of the Stanley Cup finals? He can't breathe properly. He can't do this. He can't do that. And when I was
like, so like, again, it's sports and I was being short-sighted. I'm like, yes, I hope he doesn't
play. I hope he's kept out of the match. And then no game seven, everyone's like his chara playing.
He skates out with like his jaw still bloody,
like the kind of wound because like the puck doesn't just hit you in the jaw. It also creates
a large gash because that vulcanized rubber sticks to your face and does some tearing.
And so he looked like a monster and he was out there with like gauze in his teeth playing
in the most important game of his career outside of maybe 2011, his Stanley Cup win. But that was awesome.
I remember seeing he as well as you could expect the Blues won four to one.
But what?
Whoa, what?
Don't lose that in the wash.
You tell me he lost.
Yeah, well, of course, I would.
I did that one. The fucking face was missing.
I would never talk about this game ever again.
If the Blues had lost, it would have been faded to me. I never would have mentioned it
would have made me too sad. I remember being so wrapped up in
the out. Yeah, they won. 29 on the bench. It feels more recent
to non injured player play. Yeah, time's flying by now.
COVID changed. So a few weeks ago, I was in Italy and it was
like I was going back to the hotel after
after dinner. And apparently there was a soccer game on
soccer football, there was a there was a football game on and
the Italians won. And I've never seen this before. I mean, I get
you know, there are towns where you know, there's hockey towns
and baseball towns, football towns, all that stuff. And
people go crazy when when their team wins. This was like the everybody in the 10 mile radius
just went like if the zombie apocalypse just happened. Every
single car honking for an hour and a half nonstop, people were
yelling and this was midnight. So it was it was really funny because I'm like, Hey, I'd like to,
I'd like to go to sleep, you know, maybe, you know, it's,
I'm going to, I'm going to try to get some rest cause tomorrow I got to get on
a flight. And now it's like our guy hit the ball in the goal one too many
times. And now we're, we are just, we're on it. You know,
we're spazzing. Yes. Yes. So it's, it's interesting to me how that there's a,
I mean, it's, it's all. So it's interesting to me how that there's a I mean, it's all
obviously, it's it's a component of we're Italian, this is where we live.
This is, you know, we're proud of this culture, that that sort of thing. But
it's like, I always find it funny to see what people what cultures kind of
gravitate towards that, like, we're gonna have this one thing that we all agree is super important.
And it doesn't matter if we think about it, it doesn't really make any sense, but this is what
we're going to hang our hat on. And we're going to laugh, we're going to cry, we're going to have
relationships with other people based on this. So it's always just weird to me.
Yeah. Well, it's a fun way to socialize and also like, oh yeah,
I bet you couldn't get any sleep because this isn't like, oh, I didn't sleep at all.
This isn't like Germans screaming. It's already Italians.
Like they're they're loud as can be.
I have a video.
I don't know if I could send it here, but I do have a video and it's hilarious.
Like I just go out of my hotel room and it's like, baby, baby.
Yeah, that rules that I I don't like soccer. I just go out of my hotel room and it's like, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be my buddies will be like, all right, I got to turn in early. Bayern Munich plays at 440 a.m. Yeah, I'm like, oh my God. It's going to be like,
and that game could realistically tie zero to zero. That could, that's a real possibility.
You could bet on that. And so, you know, more power to if you enjoy it. But I like
that whole culture they
have in Europe of like, and in South America too, like they spaz about their soccer teams also,
like that's really neat. Like everybody's in on it. It's, it's like bigger than the NFL here,
as far as the cultural reach and kind of the tendrils it has so deep. And that's fun. Like
you can, I bet if you live in Italy and you talk to any random person
about the Italian soccer team,
like it wouldn't be like,
like someone here trying to talk to me about the Cardinals
where I would have to like, yeah, I don't really follow.
I don't know baseball, sorry.
Like everyone over there knows and that's cool.
As an American, I'm baffled by how they all know
the lyrics to the chants.
Like, did you guys listen to these new songs?
Have they been, were they rehearsed? Time began? Like, oh, yeah, dude,
it's like Catholic mass over there where you have your
pamphlet. And they're like, you read through the prayers. Yeah,
you just have to know. And that's cool. I like their, their
sports environments over in Europe.
Well, I mean, not to not to change topics too much. Have
you guys seen what happened with that that Boeing that went down in India?
Yeah. Holy shit.
London, I think.
Yes, it was going from somewhere in India.
It was a Boeing 7878-8.
So it was an earlier plane.
So they made them in about like 2000.
That's what Trump's getting.
Trump's getting one of those.
Well, he's going to know he's going to 747-8. Oh, 2009. Trump's getting one of those. Well, he's got a 747 dash.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
Yeah. 787.
787.
Okay.
Yeah. 787 was called the Dreamliner.
So a lot of interesting things about this plane.
I'm sorry.
I'm just a little, I'm a plane geek.
So the wings and the fuselage were made out of a carbon fiber
composite and they introduced a lot of really cool technologies.
I've never flown on this plane, but I really, really want to. But I saw, like there was a video
of this plane. Apparently it took off. And like 26 seconds after takeoff in India, they issued a
Mayday call. And then they lost like about 600 feet of elevation, they lost the they lost like at about 600 feet of elevation, they lost signal with the air traffic control.
And then there's a video of some guy just,
taking a video of the plane
and it's just going down very slowly
and then you just see this giant plume of smoke.
And it's crazy.
For some reason they seem to lose both engines simultaneously
and then just lost airspeed installed
and hit an apartment building.
I mean I wonder I know that there's going to be you know a full investigation all these countries are looking into it but like you know what are your you're you know you're into aviation you know
how a little bit you know the yeah so what what do you think I mean we can put on our speculation
hats here like this is outside my head I was reading about it on Reddit, and
there was an airplane mechanic, supposedly. And he's just like,
I don't know, the odds of both engines going out simultaneously
are astronomical. They say. And it was just like, yeah, I don't
know what would cause that something electrical, I guess.
They said it wasn't bird strikes.
Okay. What was your?
Gremlins.
I'm glad you read my comment on Reddit.
That's good.
I pretended not to think about it.
On one hand, I get it, people lie.
On the other hand, I've been that guy
describing why this paraglider wrapped up
and what he did wrong, how he didn't catch the surge
and you know, like there are experts out there.
There's a lot of people.
There's a guy I watch on YouTube is called a mentor pilot
and he does these analysis, really deep dives
into these airplane disasters.
And sometimes the people survive, sometimes they don't,
sometimes it's just like,
oh, they got investigated afterwards
and you know, the pilots got reprimanded or something
But sometimes it's these major major disasters where he does a ton of research and he understands he's actually a pilot
He flies like a 737 so he knows and he's also an instructor
so he knows what like how these systems work and he can give people a really kind of
Not not a surface level understanding, but he goes really really far into it
So I mean there are there are several things that can happen
I mean, I don't know if they rotated too early and they didn't have enough
Have enough speed and just didn't have enough thrust
I don't know it just it seemed like they were still they were in a stall condition because the plane was like this, like at an
angle. And then it was just they were just losing losing
altitude. So it's it's interesting that you know, when
you watch these, these deep dives, how quickly things can
go from like everything normal to we are for certain going to die. It's like 10 seconds
and like it can go like and there could be several things that go wrong at once.
Now it's not it's not like these things go wrong all the time but like if the right um combination
of things go wrong in a plane there can be a situation where it's just like all right now
it's flipped over and you can't recover it.
You know, or, you know, some, uh,
you have some airspeed thing that's unreliable and then that, uh,
feeds into another system that, uh,
was like put in without the proper training. And then, you know,
now the plane's doing things that you can't account for.
And instead of the normal law that it's governed under,
there's like this thing called alternate law. Like there's a lot of different things that go on in these systems.
And if the pilots aren't trained or the pilots like they sometimes they just freak out. Sometimes
they're just like overwhelmed with things. And they don't see things that are like right in front
of them. So like, I don't know, I'm interested in knowing what happened because like 200 something people died and this is
right after rotation.
So like, man, like, and it's a newer-ish plane.
So it's the first one, first Dreamliner that ever went down.
Isn't there always a black box in there that like records all the decisions of the pilots?
I don't know what else it records, but I-
Yeah, yeah.
So, right.
Yeah, so there's a data flight data recorder.
So that records up to the point of an accident.
Sometimes it doesn't record things
because if there's no real accident,
if there's just an incident
and it doesn't get reported or whatever,
it gets written over.
So it's like, it's just a continual loop of
recording. So that way, if something does happen, stops
recording, and then we know what happens up to up to that up to
that point. So there's conversations of the cockpit,
there's what the instrumentation is doing, and where the plane
is, you know, the where it is in space, so you have satellite
information, that sort of thing. But I mean, it's gonna be it's gonna be
interesting knowing what it is. It's more often than not pilot
error. Because it makes sense. What else?
I don't know. I have in my head is not pilot error. This is based
on nothing. But two engines went out at the same time.
I like how that happened.
And when it happened is awful.
Obviously if it happened on the ground, they'd be fine.
Right?
If it had happened a few minutes into the flight,
the pilot would have had a lot of options like Sully did
who put it down in the Hudson.
But instead it happened at about 600 feet.
They call that the impossible turn in aviation.
There's a point where you have enough altitude
where if you were to try a U-turn
and get back to the airport,
which is incredibly attractive to a pilot, right?
They very much like landing at airports.
For our preferable over farms and shit,
not just on only is there a runway.
Buildings, mountains, yeah.
But the buildings and mountains,
but also there's like fire trucks there, EMT there.
There's all this stuff you need
for a bad situation at the airport.
So when you're at 600 feet,
there's a temptation to turn around and try to put it there.
Not in a plane that big,
but like in general aviation, like a Cessna,
they wanna turn around.
And when they do, they're out of altitude.
They burnt it all doing the turn
when they could have had better choices.
But it's, I mean, it's, I think more often than not,
it is pilot error just because it's interesting to see when people
have been doing it for a while, sometimes they adopt a muscle memory.
And when they forget one step of that, it's really hard for them to walk it back, even
though it's a super, super simple thing.
So let's say if you put the throttles into the takeoff, the
toga mode or whatever takeoff go around, right? If that for some
reason doesn't happen, and it gets put into a different detent
or whatever, but like their brains are still operating as
if they're going on a regular takeoff, that like, it just
might not register to them just because it's a muscle memory thing. So it's because there's a lot of
stuff to do when you're flying a plane like this.
I saw like, the every with like the Palestine War, the Israel
Palestine War, and like, sometimes you'll be scrolling on
social media and get stuff you don't want to see. And you have
to be like, Oh, geez, I don't want to see that right now.
That's that's, you know, grotesque. That's sad. Right.
And I saw that I saw a picture
that reminded me of that today about the India flight.
And it was like, here's a selfie recovered from a phone
by like a family that was all there.
And it was just like a nice looking, you know, Indian mom and dad.
And they're and they're sweet kids, kids like all smiling all getting ready for like a
trip and it's like oh yeah why why'd you post this this is so sad like that just
awesome it's two it's 200 people and what's what's crazy is I you know what I
would do if the plane started going down what What? I think I'd grow up a Stewart.
Hands on her tits and they're like,
actually they were going to make a full recovery and I'm like, fuck.
I opened the door. I'll never fly Air AB again. Oh my God.
Yeah, as soon as that happens, I'm stealing a full can of coke
and groping it.
I like that this is just like an 80s comedy now.
Yeah.
Wonderful.
I think that's a good way to go.
I think Plane Crash is a pretty good way to go.
I don't think you'd feel much pain.
That's a terrible way to go.
That is fucking horrifying.
That's crazy. I also would like to get that is fucking horrifying. That's crazy.
I also would like to go out in a fire.
And you know, I would just I would like to have both of your legs are broken
and you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, that's not what the fire burn hotter legs are broken.
That's a plane crash at 60 miles per hour.
We're going 360 miles per hour.
We're going not not on takeoff.
You're not. Kyle, you do know there's a survivor right?
You're talking about my plane crash that I have invented.
I've heard most of them burn today.
The Air India one, you know there's a survivor?
Yeah, I heard that.
Is he all burnt up?
If there's a survivor,
then there must have been a handful of slow dyers also.
Sure, sure, sure.
There's no way that there-
I wouldn't be one of those.
I would also not be one of those people
screaming and crying all the way down.
I would elect not to be one of them. No, I'll be one of those people screaming and crying all the way down. I would elect not to be one of them.
I'll lean into it, Woody.
They put me in that crash position.
I'll like angle my neck so it'll snap easily
against the seat. Unbuckle the seatbelt.
I don't wear the seatbelt anyway.
I pretend like I do when they come by and I'm like,
oh yeah, it's buckled.
It's not though.
There's a light above you that tells them
whether or not it's buckled.
No, there's not.
That's not what that light does.
That light does not.
It tells you whether or not you should.
You don't know what the light does.
It tells you it tells you
No, I realized immediately
Immediately how gay and dumb that was
Remove that remove that
No, it's been anyone who reminds me of my light debacle. Ban anybody who doesn't...
...slipped up without the fucking light.
Fuck.
Well, buckle up.
There's not one chance.
There's not one chance that someone survived.
That was a fully...
It was fully loaded with fuel and it exploded.
And it hit a building.
Like, there's no way anyone survived.
But they did though.
Someone lived through that. that like they actually did.
Wait, are you sure you didn't know that there's someone that survived
the jump out.
That's crazy. Okay.
Pass muster.
No, I heard him. I survived.
He might have survived.
That doesn't pass mustered.
And I that doesn't pass. But so hard. Yeah, I in the- That doesn't pass mustard. And I laughed so hard.
That doesn't pass mustard.
Yeah.
I was like, he doesn't know.
That's pretty funny.
He's like, he's taking for granted.
Let him have his spot.
He jumped out of what?
The window?
No, I think this is from the building.
This is from the actual-
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Right?
All right, well that doesn't count.
That doesn't count.
Hold on.
That's what I'm seeing also, just to back up.
He was in the emergency seat from what?
This sounds like complete and utter bullshit.
You know, this did happen in India,
and so this could be a scammer.
He could be, you know in India
where they get on the trains
and they actually like ride on the top of the train?
Did they do that with planes too?
Because if he were up top,
he may have been able to slide down at the last minute.
They might. They might be like those Afghans.
He could have landed in a huge pile of trash and refuse that absorbed the blow.
Yeah, that's a George Carlin bin, isn't it?
It's one of those foamy rivers, perhaps.
Those frothy rivers. Those healthy froths.
It's like landing in marshmallows.
No, but then you die of like some horrid strain of hepatitis.
Yeah, staph right away.
Okay, so based on this Twitter post, or ex-post rather, the sole survivor of the Air India
crash escape by jumping from the plane.
He was on seat number 11A.
So I'm going to go ahead and say this is not real.
Like that because
the thing I saw said he jumped from the second story of the window.
I can read.
Yeah. But did he do that after his plane crashed into it like a fucking cartoon character?
Yeah. I think he was probably not on the plane.
Yeah, that doesn't that doesn't seem realistic.
I'm not I'm not ready to shoot that theory down.
Maybe he was in the in the plane is what he says.
And it crashed into the building and he stepped out of the wreckage
Like like fucking Brad Pitt and then zombie movie World War Z
Which there was no world war there was barely any disease and and then he's just perfectly fine exactly where needs to be but then
Oh, what you know what the apartments on fire and he has to jump out of that and then he gets those light injuries
That you see what a day
Talk about I wouldn't know. I just think talk about it.
I wouldn't put it past like, what a hero.
Reality to be like, oh, it turned out he was in the building and he pretended to be on the plane
and that's why he is like minor injuries and they're saying he jumped from the second floor
of the building to escape the fire. That's how he got away.
Yeah.
So the plane, the entire plane hit a building and then blew up.
I don't see how anybody like it.
It just doesn't seem like a human being made.
It is an unbreakable scenario.
That's why both Wendens went out.
You got a Mr. Glass out there looking for superheroes.
Took down this little Air India.
This is all making sense.
Yeah, but the Indian guy was a little broken.
It was a little bit. Yeah.
Yeah. He had a few scratches.
Yeah. Yeah.
Maybe maybe it's someone else's blood.
Maybe.
What a funny lie to tell immediately.
Be like, thank God you're here.
That was so scary.
I jumped out right at the time that the cameras were not covering the door.
Okay.
I found two articles that said he jumped out of the plane.
It seems ridiculous.
Like wouldn't other people have tried also?
Like wouldn't there be a couple people who jumped out?
You don't have enough time to...
Okay, so if you had foreknowledge of this, by the way,
if the plane took off, they're not gonna announce stuff
to people, it's just gonna seem like the plane's not,
not going up into the sky.
It just seems like you're gonna still be in the seat.
You're not gonna be like, oh shit,
this plane's gonna crash.
You're gonna take off your seatbelt,
run to the door, open the door. There's no there's no shot that
that that's
in this makes sense. If they told the passengers that they were going down,
the stewardess is what I'll get groped.
Yeah, that's true. Yeah, yeah. All the coke is missing. Yeah, yeah.
Double fisting whole cans.
The stewardess.
My last bit of centience, I'm guzzling a full sugar Sierra Mist.
Oh, sweet nectar.
I shouldn't have groped to that lady's tits and stolen this soda.
I should have jumped out like that industrious Indian guy.
You know it's not called Sierra Mist anymore, you know why? I didn't. I thought that Sierra Mist was totally gone.
It's because there was a porn star named Sierra Mist.
That's right. And they let their trademark lapse and they were like, you know what?
Sierra Mist doesn't want to sell, doesn't want to do business with us. So let's just
rebrand Starry. So now Sierra Mist is called Starry and Sierra Mist is a whore on the internet who's doing quite well, I'm sure
Sorry is gonna lose the eventual battle to sprite it's just soda. I thought they were gonna lose to Sierra Mist
I guess they lost about
Taylor where are you? Where are you from? Where do you live?
St. Louis, um, So I was just in Kansas
and Missouri like a few days ago. And I was I was there for a
friend's wedding. And I was introduced to I don't know if
you guys have it over there. You might it might be a Kansas thing.
But Spangles. Have you ever tried this?
I haven't tried it. I've heard of it. Like, yeah, but so
Spangles to everybody in Kansas. So my girlfriend's from there.
And apparently, everybody who lives in Kansas considers it kind of like, I don't know, low rent food. But it's fucking awesome. It's really good. It's like, it's, it's kind of like a five guys, but everything's like 50s nostalgia. And the burgers are really good. The fries are like that really nice, crispy, like double fried fry. They have
like good drinks, but they also I'm not a big drinker, but they also have margaritas 32 ounce margaritas with an extra shot in
it that you can get from your car for $7. So if you want to
get day drunk, I mean, this is this is the place you get a
really good cheeseburger, you get you get some awesome fries and then you get this margarita and you you end up spending like $15
Like it's so cool. That's a hell of a deal. Oh, yeah, you get your Spangles burger your Spangles margarita
I've never got my brother lives in Kansas City
I'll have to ask him if he's ever popping over to Spangles, but we had a
Place called tropes. It was called Tropical something, but
everyone called it Trops in Columbia, Missouri. I went to Mizzou for college and they had
like an irresponsibly dosed margarita you could buy. It was just a margarita shop where
you could go in, buy it. They put it in a giant Styrofoam cup for you. And then they
send you on your way because usually you're like picking it up before you're on the way to a party or some get together.
And they had the one me and my buddies would always get was called the silver bullet. And it was like,
like, like a total of like seven or eight shots of alcohol and then another 151 on top of it.
And so it would be like, we're going to a football game. We just have to get one drink at trops and then drink like most of it on the
way to the tailgate.
And then by the time we get there, we're golden.
Like we're already fucked up.
And that was like, uh, they had a, I used to use a fake ID there all the time
earlier in college and they had a wall of shame where like if you got caught using a fake
id they'd take your picture and then they put it up behind the the thing and i just like always when
i'd be using a fake id there i'm like you know what i don't like this shit and like this is just
like cheap easy drunk fuel if i get caught and they take my picture and put it up whatever like yeah I'm gonna ride this train till the wheels come off and they
never caught me it was the most obvious fake ID it was not a real ID it was like
an old situation it was an Illinois ID I don't even remember the fake name I
wish I did I'll have to try and ruminate. And like it was so clear that this was a fake ID.
The fucking holograms didn't look right. Like you couldn't build it correctly. So I got a
Pokemon card. The company that I got it from sent me like two, maybe three as a part of the deal.
I bought it on the internet., it was funny. My mom actually
took my picture for my fake ID because they needed a picture with a correct like DMV background and
my mom like, I was like, hey, uh, I need you to take my picture and she's like, what for? And I'm
like, I'm ordering fake IDs off the internet and I need, you someone to hold it for me and she was like
well okay and then she just took the picture for me. The picture part looks good. She did a great
job with the composition of that but yeah the one of the times I lost a fake ID I went to a
gas station. I was on the way to a get-together so stopped at a gas station got some beer got
was on the way to a get together. So stopped at a gas station, got some beer, got, uh, or didn't actually buy beer. I was buying cigarettes and I was getting some old, some camel crushes.
And I had my fake ID above my real ID in my wallet. And I thought it would look like seedy
if I passed over the fake ID and got the, my real ID out. And so I was like, okay, well,
this has worked a bunch. I'll just give him my fake ID for these cigarettes I'm he's probably doesn't even care I'm back in college I'm obviously over
18 that was when he was the age not 21 and this Indian guy immediately was like this is fake as lost a fake ID on cigarettes.
I had to tell him my real ID after he, afterward, for him to sell me the cigarettes.
It's just fake as shit.
And it's like, really?
Yeah, it is, it is.
I can't believe other people haven't picked up on it, but.
Cool.
Well, speaking of fake as shit,
I actually looked up the survivor of that crash.
Holy crap.
So this is CNN world. So I don't know how reliable that is. It
seems like better than Twitter, right? It says it seemed
impossible, but shortly after news broke that an airing day
flight had crashed in the city of Ahmedabad video started
circulating on social media showing a man walking from the
scene in a bloodstained shirt. Imagine what that's like, like
just put a minute behind you.
And he just, you're just in your apartment murdering like every other
day when suddenly 787 dreamliner.
30 seconds after takeoff, there was a loud noise and then the plane crashed.
It all happened so quickly.
It quoted him as saying in an interview at the hospital where he's being treated he said he'd been visiting
family it was trying to the uk with his brother who had been sitting in a different row all right so
he had called his family to tell them he's fine adding that they were upset about his brother and
all of the others who died yeah okay so a doctor told told CNN that Ramesh's condition was not very critical and that he could be released in
the next couple of days. So this off man like nonsense. This seems
insane. Yeah, I okay, he has some blood in the images, but
he's not very badly injured. He is very comfortable and under
strict observation. No issues said Dr. Raj Nish Patel,
and under strict observation, no issues, said Dr. Rajnish Patel, professor and head of surgery at whatever.
Okay. So, okay.
He was, he was sat in a seat 11A of the flight,
the emergency exit row just in front of the plane's left wing.
And yeah, I guess that seat is right where the spar of the wing would go under
and it would be a solid place for the aircraft to hit
The ground but as far as survivability above it that is incredibly surprising. I
Okay, all right. That doesn't sound real
Now but I mean CNN CNN reported on it. So, I mean they've never they've never messed up
This be a marketing ploy by that new Final Fantasy Final Destination movie. It could be yeah, they actually make a plane go down
Yeah, they take the plane down for them because I saw Zach linked a post that said that Final Destination movie. It could be, yeah. They actually make a plane go down, yeah.
They take the plane down for the-
Because I saw Zach linked a post that said that
the seat that the survivor, quote,
survivor claims to have been in was seat 11A,
which is the seat in Final Destination 1
where that dude is like,
I gotta get off this plane.
And spaz-
Is it really?
Apparently. I did no due diligence. I looked at the
tweet and I said, wow, this is written in semi broken English,
but that's okay. Okay.
Okay, yeah, it's seat number 11. This is this is bullshit, dude.
It's bullshit.
How do you know it's bullshit? What is it?
Dude, cuz it's 11. It's it's staring you in the face. It's bullshit. How do you know it's bullshit? What is it? Dude, because it's 11.
It's staring you in the face.
There's no way he's like, oh yeah, he's fine.
Everybody else grew some death.
Him?
No, no problem.
Yeah.
Well, we know in the coming weeks.
11A is the thing that makes you scared.
Yeah, if you get taken out by a Rube Goldberg machine or something.
Yeah.
No, I think the most compelling thing is that everyone else died terribly.
Oh, is that what it is?
Okay.
So in the first, so the premise of the first final destination movie and all of
them thereafter is that a whole class is going on a senior trip to like Paris
from Chicago and the one kid drifts off to sleep waiting on at the gate,
you know, before they board the plane and he dreams about the next 30 minutes in
which he bought, they board the plane and then it immediately goes down after
takeoff. His seat number is 11 a because he has this board the plane and then it immediately goes down after takeoff his seat number is 11 a
Because he has this premonition and he slowly starts seeing the things he dreamt about come true
He freaks out during the boarding process
gets his whole class ejected or at least a
Certain amount of them ejected from the plane and then they all like watch the plane explode out the windows of the airport in the coming
Days because a mistake has been made death is coming for them to balance the slate of the airport in the coming days because a mistake has been made
death is coming for them to balance the slate of the living and the dead but it can't just jump
out of the shadows and shoot them it has to like fate has to befall them and like an overly uh
kind of piano start dropping off of the strings that the movers improperly dealt with and yes
quite literally that kind of thing they They do that for like nine.
Every time I'm driving behind a log truck now, I'm like,
a log truck scene is scary.
I'm getting around this log truck because they get scared.
Everybody has this moment for the log truck scene and final destination.
It's either two or three.
Two, that's two, yeah.
Like now when they're on the highway and they see a log truck,
they're like, nope, let's get around this. Start bouncing and going through people's windshields and cutting heads off.
It's funny because logs don't really bounce.
So it's just like, well, what would they do if they fell off a truck?
They would probably hit the ground and roll.
Yeah, they don't bounce like they're made of rubber.
But yeah, there's no no chair.
This was seat 11A.
Also, they said that 11A is in front of the wing?
What?
Okay, my geek part of my brain is-
Yeah, I thought the people that traditionally
were most likely to survive plane crashes
were way at the back.
Is that not right?
It depends on the crash, yeah.
But I mean, if it's full of fuel and then it hits, yeah.
I mean, you have a lot of stuff in front of you.
So imagine every row in front of you is an airbag, just made of meat and metal, you know?
Hmm. What a terrible way to go. You're so wrong about that being a good way to go.
Oh, it's a good way to go. You instantly just you're done. You're done. The crater. The descent. If you have one
of these lazy crashes where we skid across the runway and burn
alive and jet fuel, I don't want that. But if you like like 911,
for example, they didn't feel nothing. That is in front. Oh,
no, no, no, they're going full speed into that building.
There's there's no way they felt anything. So 11A is in front of
the wing. But it's I don't think that's I mean, it is it is an exit row.
So I, it all adds up. This is all adds up. No, it doesn't. No,
no, stop. Let's
you you you shut up.
Show me the air.
No, this is crazy. Everyone else burns to death. No one's even
close to surviving. And this guy's bruised.
Like that doesn't make sense. He, he left.
You sound like you haven't even seen Unbreakable.
Well, I've seen Unbreakable and that actually is the most surprising part.
Not the survivor.
I mean, you're right. Nine times out of 10, you say a movie,
I either pretend to have seen it or I just am honest. I'm like, I've never seen Titanic. I don't know.
You've never seen Titanic?
I've seen bits on TV, but it doesn't seem like my speed. And so I'm not going to watch
the whole thing.
Actually, speaking of Titanic, that would have been a good way to go. Not the people
on the Titanic, but the Ocean Gate. Oh my God. Yeah. Very preferable. You say very preferable.
Titanic. Like, yeah.
Well, they went down to the Titanic.
I mean, very technically, they are people who perished.
Like, their names are now on a plaque that's on the boat.
And that is, you're right,
because I didn't realize how instant it was
until I watched a YouTube video on it.
Yes.
And it's like, there wasn't, like on a plane crash
or like obviously the real Titanic, there's a lead up in the case of
the real Titanic, a very long one, a plane crash, a much
shorter one. But like, there is a time of abject horror where
you are in no control, you have no ability to exert control of
your situation. Those guys go into the bottom of the sea.
Apparently, like there was never even a second of like, Hey,
this mad cat's controllers running low on batteries. This doesn't seem like a well constructed thing. Hey, there was never even a second of like, hey, this mad cat's controller is running low on batteries.
Or like, this doesn't seem like a well-constructed thing.
Hey, there was a weird creek there.
Is that concerning to us?
It was just instantaneous.
Right.
They say if you can hear the noise, then you're OK.
And because if you don't, then that's it's just lights out. There's no you're
it's faster than your nerves can can transmit the pain to your
brain. It's faster than the speed of sound to
like, Oh, yeah, you're
getting anything. Yeah, you know, that there your brain
works at the speed of chemistry. They got they got fucking
imploded. And some of the simulations show they make the people out of these little cubes.
Yeah.
And they're just shattering as the person implodes to nothing and it's like turning into goo.
I saw the wreckage.
Now the wreckage, it just looked like it was torn apart.
But I haven't seen any chunks of people or anything.
There wouldn't have been. I don't think there like chunks of people or anything which there there wouldn't there wouldn't have been so there were according to them
Yeah, the air inside got super heated and essentially they were vaporized
I mean the amount of pressure down there it was what is it 12,000 feet something like that?
I mean just look at pressure at
Stupid it's so stupid
I watched that whole documentary about it and you can even
see there's a part where the Zach was talking about it in the text over here where the wife
is up top and she's like monitoring and there's another guy with her and the cameras on her
and you hear and she goes, what was that? Yeah, that was the sub-exploder. Yeah. Uh-huh.
So the press receives the message after the explosion because of like it takes it takes so long to get back up or something
which didn't make sense to me. But that's what they said.
So Kyle in reading the expressions, did you feel like other people in the room knew what it was?
Nobody knew what it was. Yeah. No.
They started to bonk and yeah. She was like, what was that? She was yeah.
Because you know, then the search began and the Navy was called and hours and hours and then we started watching it on the news later on. It was like, what was that? She was, yeah. Cause you know, then the search began and the Navy was called and hours and hours.
Then we started watching it on the news later on.
It was like, yeah, but they only have four hours of air left.
Yeah, but they knew that there wasn't anybody there.
So the pressure down there at 12,500 feet
is 6,000 pounds per square inch.
So it's roughly 400 times the pressure that we have now. It's 400 atmospheres.
So that's pretty insane. That's really, really crazy. So imagine that just all around you
in every direction, just forcing you into like a singularity, you know?
Yeah, that's a good way to go. You like, you were still planning your post expedition
lunch in your head when you get God.
I'm not convinced faster is better.
I know I'm not pro suffering,
but if you were like, Woody, you die on Monday,
I'd be like, oh, you know what?
Thanks for the heads up.
I'm going to, you know, tie up some loose ends
between now and then. How do you know what? Thanks for the heads up. I'm going to, you know, tie up some loose ends between now and then.
How do you get out?
What does about our death?
I'd rather bank
armored, you drop a stewardess on an airplane.
You'd be like, honey, this is the folder with all the financial.
This is the bank. This is this.
This is the bad.
You're going to need to know this
after I'm gone.
I'd say my goodbyes.
I don't know, just sort of wrap things up,
do what I gotta do.
Maybe break out the paramotor one more time.
I mean, that's what I'm saying.
And that would be the final destination part of it.
That would be one day morning
when you're like, one last flight.
Like that would be the thing that cost you your life, man.
So that's interesting because like, I don't know about you guys, like I've had a lot of
really interesting experiences just in life.
Like I'm 38 and I've been fortunate and you know, getting to do a lot of cool stuff.
And I think about if I died
tomorrow, what would my like regrets be? What would I like?
Do I have things that I really, really wanted to do? And, you
know, just they fell by the wayside? Or do I have, you
know, dreams deferred or something like that? And I
always come back to, I feel like I've done enough. Like I know,
I still want to do more. I feel like but like, if we were to
call it, you know,
call it a game tomorrow, I wouldn't feel bad about it. And that's a good place to be mentally. Yeah,
yeah. But like, that doesn't mean I want I want to, you know, I still have life insurance and all
that stuff. I want everybody to be taken care of. But like, it's still, I don't know, it's, I feel like I've gotten a lot of
things done that I wanted in life. And, you know, everything
past this is just kind of gravy, you know, like, I maybe I'll
feel differently in five years where I'm like, No, I need to do
more. But like, I feel like, you know, I don't know if a lot of
people can say that. But what do you guys think?
No, I mean, that's if that's how you feel that's great
Like I think the average thing would be people being like, oh man, I should have done this
I should have done that should have handled this differently. I should have grew up to stewardess. Yeah
Shock on those three coats. Yeah. Yeah, you're looking at you're doing that
You're having that little like forethought from the position of like you're in an afterlife looking back at the present life though kind of.
Not necessarily.
I just mean like right now if this was just lights out.
I'm not saying like looking back on the totality of...
Well, no, I'll be too dead to care.
But I think just in terms of if I had a choice, If someone says you are going to die tomorrow
and this is 100% certain you can't do anything about it,
I wouldn't be like,
the only regret I would have is like,
I wish I would spend more time with my family
or just have more time with people that I love.
Yeah, exactly.
Just rewatch the first five seasons and that's it.
Now I'm gonna go get that writer.
I'm gonna go get that fat fuck, take him out. I've only got a day it. I'm gonna go I'm gonna go get I'm gonna go get that writer I'm gonna get that fat fuck take him out I only
got a day left I'm taking him with me there's no way he gets to outlive me
that's a good one that's a good one. No sir no sir I'm gonna don't worry I'll
make him tell you how it all ends before I you know. Would you like bludgeon him
to death with Winds of Winter? Yes yes I would I would make him eat his words
actually until his I would I would would make him eat his words actually until his... I
would force feed him his unfinished, the blank pages that he hadn't finished and then kick
him in the stomach when he was gorged with them to rupture his belly. Like in second
seven. So this sounds like fan fiction. It sounds like a good, you know, you should...
Is this like Harry Potter and the Curse Child? Yeah, the estate's very litigious. I didn't
mean any of that. In video game yeah of course it's
all in Minecraft yeah yeah no I think after this there's either absolutely nothing or they're
gonna wake you up out of that pod and be like what was it like mm-hmm what if you wake up out
of the pod and you're short you'll be in the future where pods exist so you won't care
You'll be in the future where pods exist so you won't care. What if you're like 5'2"?
I mean, who's to say the average man isn't 4'8"?
Like I could live with 5'2 if I'm in a future with pods.
We can go, you can just simulate universes and pods.
And apparently I'm, there's the main character in my simulation.
So, cause they woke me up. Y'all didn't get woken up.
What if, what if when you die, you just get woken up and
you you're in like the beginning of the most mundane part of your
life. Like let's say you had to wait in line at the DMV for three
hours. But then you get just get put back in the in the beginning,
very beginning of that. You're like, Oh, god damn it. Like,
it's like a repeating purgatory. Oh, yes,
exactly. So like a bad road trip or something. Yeah. Yeah,
that's always one of the scariest depictions of hell that
you're in a pocket universe that that that's on repeat for all
eternity, right? Yeah, not the whole burning in a lake of fire
thing. So it seems to sort of pale in comparison from sitting
at the DMV for the next eternity, knowing that when you
do finally get called, it starts over again.
Because every time he says you don't have the correct paperwork, you're right
back pulling your number.
Yep.
Yes.
Yeah.
Um, the issue I have with the idea of like heaven or hell is, is that it's so,
it seems very one-dimensional.
It's, it's like, well, you don't like this and you like
this. So you're going to be happy for all eternity. But the only reason why happiness even matters
is because you have something to compare it to, is because we have bad and good. And also,
I think there is value to life because at some point it ends. If it was never ending, it would be essentially
meaningless. And then if you only had good stuff where you just like, all right, just
a constant drip of, you know, oxytocin or serotonin or whatever like this, I'm just
feeling happy all the time. Like that sounds like hell. That actually sounds like hell.
You know what the way to fix that is like one day a year in heaven you have to visit hell.
I was saying one day a year all crime is legal. You have a little bit of a purge. No like you're in heaven
a jillion years into that you're right you will have forgotten how shitty things can be. And so just one day a year, you leave heaven and all the delicious foods that you can eat as much as you
want of and you never ever gain weight and you have to go live a day in hell. And then that's
horrible because you're on fire and it hurts. And then the next day you're back in heaven and now
suddenly that food's sweeter again. You're like, man, I was taking, I was taking this for granted. I don't think that that would, that would really help people that
much because let's say if you're, if you're a billionaire and then you do a, you guys remember
this, this movie Brewster's Millions? So yeah, so it's Mel Brooks and he gets to, he's a, he's a millionaire and he decides, like his friends do a sort of bet that if he can make
it 30 days as being homeless, then he gets some crazy amount of money.
And through the 30 days, his friends end up fucking him over and then he ends up falling
in love with like a real, you know, hot homeless woman, which is never occurred.
That's as unreal is this fucking survivor.
Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. She was seed 11 a two. But it's it's just
like, I don't think one day of perspective, like, is it? Yeah,
I think so. I think it not the Eddie Murphy movie where if he
wants or maybe no, that's trading places. That's right.
He has to spend all the money in a
weekend or something Richard it's not Eddie Murphy though it's the guy who set himself on fire prior
which is Richard Pryor yeah he to inherit like 30 you're right you're right he has to spend a
million in like a day and the whole point is to teach him that the money's not worth anything that
it's about and through a day or two of wasting that money. Yes, he learns the value of money. It's
a fun little story at the end. Right. So I so the movie I'm
talking about, I think is life stinks. Oh, that is Yep. Yep.
Yep. That's it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There we go. Life life
stinks. There we go. But, you know, same same error, right.
But I think you don't get one one day of perspective shift and then everything's fine. Like if you're
if you're a billionaire and then just trading places, like
trading places is another one kind of similar thing. And you
also get to see Jodie Foster's tits. Not Jodie Foster. Jamie
Curtis, Jamie. The cars. Yeah, they're much better tits
anyway. Yes. But yeah, also the idea that like, let's say you
get you
have to go. You have to go to prison, right? Like one day of
prison doesn't make you a better, better person. I think
because there's no stakes. Yeah, exactly.
I think the idea that you're gonna get out tomorrow is
already like a softening of that.
If it was like, you're gonna go,
you're gonna get a, like every month you get judged.
Every month you could go to hell forever.
So you better like, maybe that's the thing.
I don't know.
I just, I hate, I really don't like the the concept of heaven or hell it just seems
Kind of dumb to me like and I'm sorry if I offend people and you know in the audience or you guys
I don't I don't mean I like the idea of it being and a lot of like fantasy and sci-fi has done this
I like the idea that everyone would have a their own have a hells and heavens that we're not gonna be in some big gold
fucking castle or some city of gold and with clouds to walk on and just all that bullshit. That your version
of heaven might have been like that great day with your family down by the lake pushing
the swing and having a barbecue. And you just get to have that day as much as you want.
And it's that maybe you have even have that ability to like, you know, how you would love
to watch Lord of the Rings again, fresh,
having never seen it. If you could just be like, fucking reset Lord of the rings,
you say, what's it about? Well, have a seat.
And you're back in that fucking center Rama. Like,
like you got the smell of the popcorn and sticky shoes and your brothers.
Yeah.
It's this great movie about walking where they pretend there's a fellowship,
but really Frodo does it all on his own.
Just so not
Yeah, Sam, okay Sam carries it they all carried their own weight
I mean Boromir bit of a slight error early on and then he seemed like alerts 20% way through the movies
Is there a canonical reason for those Eagles?
I think I think they Eagles are their own people.
They can just command it about.
That's a very human-centric idea
that we should just order the Eagles to do this and that.
You could say, why didn't Haradrin just show up
with their Oliphants and carry the ring?
Because they were doing their own shit.
They had their own motivations.
The Eagles are-
Oh, they were too busy.
Okay, here's my take.
I think I got this from somewhere else.
But Sam carried Frodo and the ring didn't impact Sam
because he was carrying Frodo.
So why not put the ring on a chicken
and carry the chicken all the way to Mordor?
Exactly.
The transitive properties of the ring and its effects
are a bit of a loophole.
I think the biggest reason they didn't do that
it's because it would have
ruined the story.
It's quite cool.
No, I understand.
It's quite cool.
Even that, like think about it.
Gandalf had it with the pincers and all was good.
He could have just held those pincers and gone all the way.
That's true, too. Why he had to put it in a bag.
Now, Gandalf was immediately feeling the temptation. Remember when he went to touch it on Bilbo's floor
where they use that big giant ring?
But when he grabbed it out of the fire with the tongs, it was no big deal. It's quite cool to the
touch. And then he put it in Frodo's bare hands.
I think it would have to, I think it has to do with whether or not it's in your possession,
because Frodo is only very rarely wearing the ring. Mostly it's on a chain around his neck. Sure. It impacted him greatly though.
Yes, it did. So I'm saying like chicken. Yeah, you could.
Then one of the greatest stories of Western literature in the past 150 years
wouldn't have been good. It would have been really great.
If there's a chicken loophole,
it would have been an awful story about a really ornery increasingly ornery
chicken.
How much damage would that chicken do?
Like I wake up and Smeagol's licking his fingers.
He ate a fucking chicken in the night.
Didn't Bilbo have the ring in like a, like a,
like an envelope or something like in in his pocket yeah he was walking around
with his pocket there you know for for a long time and he'd like sort of rub against it and think
about it um there's lots of that that's it that's a bit of an issue but it's it doesn't really
be able to explain unless you think too hard why did bilbo barely age but smegle aged horribly
please explain oh it's it's just a time line thing.
So like Smeagol was centuries older than any other character.
So like Smeagol had the ring for like five, six hundred years or something.
He actually did age well.
Yeah. If you fast forward the clock on Bilbo another 500 years,
he would have been a ghoulish little creature like like God.
I think it also corrupted Smeagol in some ways too.
Like he already had a point.
He took the ring with murder and he coveted it.
So like so obsessively and spoke to it and it spoke back.
He had a very different relationship
than the Bilbo had where Bilbo sort of like put it on a shelf and left it there
and like was just in this protective aura around it, not focusing on it daily.
Yeah, Smeagol indulged it and that was a big thing that he did. He offered no pushback. He loved it.
He was so much so that the ring felt that Smeagol was a little too touchy feely and left him and
like rolled out of the cave. Yeah, well it's because the ring was trying to get back to Sauron. And it's like, holy shit, 580 years I've been in this cave with
this lunatic eating raw fish singing to himself. We got to get
out. We got to bounce. Maybe someone slight there's no one
more insane than this on earth. So I can only upgrade by anyone
else finding me.
So if you got if you got the ring in a box or you encased it in rock
and then you just gave it to one of the eagles, I mean this thing is solved in an afternoon, right?
Oh you know a few days for sure. If the eagle would carry it although then they also they have
to do with the fel riders you know. They have to kill the Nazgul first. The Nazgul are going to be
patrolling. Because the Nazgul are going to fuck those eagles up. They're going to be at Minas
Morgul or whatever like in that. how would the Nazgul find the Eagles?
They didn't yeah, how?
the Dragons
Yeah, so like so I understand how they would win the fight if they could find them
But they had they struggled to find Frodo. So how would they find the movie?
So it was tough to find Frodo because there was anywhere in Middle Earth he could be but it's kind of like Woody if you're trying to return the ring
and I know there's the only place you can return that ring is my guest room bathroom garbage
only one blockbuster still open like it's gonna be I can spawn camp I can be like all right I'm
gonna keep three of my ghouls outside my bathroom because he can have the ring as much as he wants. And frankly, the longer he holds onto the ring,
the greater the chances. There wasn't even a guard outside the door of mountain. Yeah.
Like the Apple store is better. That was sloppy. The tactical mistakes happen.
Yeah. Like like like like balls to it lately. Just stro road in there and not strongly by the way they were like they crawled through the door if you could have had Igor the one-eyed bald orc who you always leave in the back and he could have stomped out fucking salmon and Frodo yeah there at the end they were all like Smeagol almost defeated them one orc would have taken him out or like a locked door. Locked door would have done it.
You don't even need an orc,
like just throw a big old like bar behind it, locked door.
Just a tall door handle, they can't reach.
Even a locked, tall door.
I love the implications of that.
That's another solution.
But what if one gets on the other's shoulders, Kyle?
Ah, you got me then.
That'd have to be a very tall door.
You got me then.
Or just have a troll, like you chain a troll to that front door. It's like bitch
You're not getting past that. So what if what if to get past the door?
They had some lock and load. Oh
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Excellent transition there, Freddie.
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Look at that.
So just a quick, quick question.
So this is version two of Lock and Load
because I remember the first one was nine pills.
Yes. So we basically
we, you know, Derek and his guys,
me personally, me, Woody,
we came up with a way to,
I guess, make the pills, the pills are larger now.
And so it's not as though there's been like a reduction
in any of the dosages.
It's just, they used to be those tiny like powder capsules
and now they're those larger, like,
I think we also say, you know, those things like cod,
like the fish oil tablets, like that are kind of big.
Yeah.
And then we also save some space,
consolidated some ingredients.
I don't think we backed off on much
because the sunflower lecithin is still the same amount.
Correct?
No, they found a more concentrated version
of one of the ingredients.
I forget the details.
Oh, maybe it was the pygium.
Okay.
Well then yeah.
Prions, we had prions.
Prions, yeah.
We added things to give you prions.
You do need those.
Like RFK.
Yeah.
So quick question. So I always i always you know since we're talking about lord of the rings i always look at um movies and you know
these fantastical movie series um and think about what the implications are um so i recently re-watched
all the harry potter movies and it seems to to me Voldemort wasn't actually that bad.
And the real villain of this would have been Dumbledore.
Because-
Okay.
I don't know this about Harry Potter.
I'll be easy to sway.
So Harry Potter, I mean, it's,
I'll give you the broad strokes.
He's a wizard and then he has to beat the bad guy
who is, you know, the most powerful wizard in the world and he just wants to kill all the half-bloods.
He wants only pure-blood wizards. He doesn't like humans and he's basically kind of like Hitler.
So that's what I remember from the movies. He himself is a half-blood.
That makes him even bad. Exactly. Very much Hitlerian, right?
He's also looking fascist who brainwipes and
tortures and his nose is fucked up. Correct. Yeah, he has no
because he's turning he's like turning into a snake and blah,
blah, right. So I think, you know, Voldemort's not he's not
a good guy. But Dumbledore, he's the he's the professor. He's the
good professor that guides Harry and and Hermione and Ron. And
the good professor that guides Harry and Hermione and Ron. And the way I see it, all he does is he gets in the way. He doesn't give Harry or anybody like very pertinent information. Like he died in
the sixth movie or something like that. He could have just given Harry like a paragraph of like,
here's what you do to beat the bad guy. Here's like, I know
all of this. But no, he does he does the traditional boomer
thing. And like, well, because you didn't read my mind, I'm
going to punish you. And that the entire next movie is them
trying to interpret when Dumbledore meant, even though at
any point, he could have just told them straight up, have
direct communication and solved all of this. And this happens in
every single movie. They talk about
Dumbledore being like the greatest wizard that ever
lived, but you never see it. He doesn't demonstrate any of his
powers. He anytime he needs to do something, he just leaves
like they go Oh, Dumbledore is away on vacation Dumbledore is
away on business. And then Harry has to go to school where he's
you know, there's mortal danger for him and every other kid
It's it's a terrible terrible fucking situation. So
Voldemort all he really did all he really did was like, yeah, he might have killed a few people
but it's it wasn't as but like he it's not as bad as
Basically convincing a bunch of kids a bunch of kids and parents to bring them to a school where every year something terrible happens. Kids die.
They have like these traumatic traumatic events and this happens like as like
super regularly. Um, all,
all Voldemort ever did was like just scared some kids.
And then that's it. Like he couldn't even kill Harry Potter.
That's how ineffective he was. And I think,
and he did a lot of people die in the last movie
at the end there?
Yeah, but that's only because he recruited an army.
It was very apparent that like when-
That in some circles is bad behavior.
You know, no-
Hear him out, hear him out, hear him out.
It is.
I'm not saying he wasn't bad right at the end, right?
But he was portraying
lapsed on the bridge.
He's a terrorist.
Wow. OK, cool.
All right. So this this is
this is the worst thing that's ever happened.
That's the worst thing that's ever happened.
You don't see anybody going in the water.
He just OK. He that's true.
It was more of an infrastructure attack.
He broke some infrastructure.
I'm so sorry. This is this.
Now you hit the kid. You praise Ukraine for doing that. Yeah. Well, exactly. Yeah.
I don't mean to be. You're right about you say you're wrong. You caught me on it.
Okay. Double was very absentee from what I recall from the movies where it'd be
like, there's something incredibly important. I must tell you, but not now.
incredibly important. I must tell you, but not now.
And he's like, damn dude, like there's,
there's living trolls in the bathroom. Yes.
There's a tree that will take you to death.
There's a tree that beats you to death.
If you get beaten up by the whopping Willow, then that's on you.
What did you think that the school with kids? It do? Don't put it in a school with kids.
There's kids in the school.
It's guarding the secret entrance.
It's not, why is that?
Okay, don't make this a school.
Don't put a school here.
This doesn't make any sense.
That's true.
Don't go in the woods,
cause you'll get eaten by spiders or bludgeoned to death.
Sending your kid to Hogwarts is only like that.
It wasn't his idea to put it there.
It's only a barely safer school than like that LeBron James school
Where like everyone's like no, we're not learning to read we're doing a gang
So key and peel did a whole bit where it's a Harry Potter wizarding school, but in Compton
That's funny, I mean they needed metal detectors and shit. That's funny.
I mean, they needed metal detectors at the regular Hogwarts because a lot of those, they
were giving those kids too much power.
Yeah.
I got no complaints about Dumbledore, but the whole like premise of the books is that
they're every year returning to a school that is very dangerous to attend.
Also, the universe in which this like this universe
establishes that you could
against somebody's will turn
somebody into like an animal
or like some inanimate object.
Sure. And it's it's nuts because
like, what if you were like a piece
of shit? Like, what if you were a
bad person?
And so,
right. But like, I feel like
Voldemort could have done way worse, like way worse.
Imagine if you're a guy and then you wanted to like...
He tortured Neville's parents to death.
Oh no.
Poor Neville.
Oh no.
He didn't do it.
No, Bellatrix Lestrange did.
Yeah, but she works for him.
This is like, leave Hitler out of this. This was Gerbils mistake
Like this is this is a I'm not saying I'm not saying he didn't do anything wrong
I'm saying that because because of Dumbledore's negligence
I think that he is the bigger villain and even in death after Harry Potter died
He got you got a vodka davered and he to heaven, and then he talked to Dumbledore,
and Dumbledore still wouldn't give him
a fucking straight answer.
So that-
Because he couldn't.
Because he couldn't.
Because if you tell Harry Potter what's going on,
then things won't play out the way they're supposed to.
Harry Potter is great.
Why not?
Well, he's a sacrificial lamb.
You can't tell a seven-year-old,
oh, in about seven years,
you're going to die at the right time
so that evil can be defeated.
Don't worry, you're also going to get pussy from a cute redhead.
Is that not new?
Oh, Ginny Weasley, I suppose, but she's very young.
You shouldn't be saying that.
But he's still, he's a good girl.
Are they like 25 by the end of that show?
No.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They're 16, 17.
The actors are getting pretty old.
I know, they're all older than I am.
God, man, like it just doesn't make any sense.
The whole thing of you're doing this at the right time,
except for the fact that when Voldemort got a body again,
he was very, very weak.
If you got like four wizards from that school,
like the professors, they could have taken him out.
He was almost taken out in that first one.
Remember with Harry's ancestors or whatever,
and then they're like, let go,
like when they were doing that, they almost killed him.
You're telling me that a Dumbledore wouldn't have done this?
Well, because when Voldemort was raised from the dead,
they used Harry Potter's hair,
and once again, binding them together,
their life forces together,
and their wands also share the same,
I think unicorn tail core.
So they're really nerfed against one another
and they don't figure that out until the very end.
That's how Harry Potter keeps escaping.
He keeps escaping because Voldemort wants to be the one
to physically do him in with a magical wand.
If he just got a knife or a fucking gun, that's the fucking,
that's the version I want to see the YouTube, like Freddie Wong version,
where like someone gives Harry Potter a 12 gauge shotgun.
There's Harry Potter with guns. That's a YouTube video. Yeah, for sure.
Every evil wizard would have a hard day. Uh, day. If Harry had an AR 15,
that's gone differently. You need a good song. There's a song that says if I was in Hogwarts I would
solve problems with physical violence. I mean that's the thing I didn't like about Harry Potter.
Just the way they handled magic in it where every single time something came up it would be like
single time something came up it would be like oh Harry this door is locked you know unlock us Doris and it's like okay well that's handled and then it was just
too much of that what I would have liked is if once he got into heaven and was
talking to Dumbledore Dumbledore was like Harry my god I gave you the time
machine thing and you used it once. This can solve everything.
Use it again.
Yes.
Time Turner and he didn't give it to him.
The Ministry of Magic loaned it to Hermione so she could take extra classes.
That's what they do with the most powerful mechanic in the world.
They give it to a 12 year old girl so they can take an extra biology course.
That's what they do with it.
That's crazy.
Yeah, the worst thing that ever happened.
Yeah. What are you going to do? You want to get real do with it. That's crazy. Yeah, that's the worst thing that ever happened. Yeah.
What are you gonna do?
You wanna get real nuts with it.
Why don't you start doing the math on their currency system?
Nuts and galleons and silver sickles.
It doesn't add up.
It doesn't add up.
No, it doesn't.
Also, Harry, Harry is canonically a millionaire.
Like he's worth probably three, four million dollars
or something like that.
And it's literally in a pile of gold
that he never even bothers going to because he mostly, when he's not at school, school, everything's paid for And it's literally in a pile of gold that he never even bothers going to
because he mostly when he's not at school, school everything's paid for it's boarding school. But
he's mostly in the summer season the muggle world, the human world and all of his expenses are like
minor and they're covered by his aunt and uncle. So he has no expenses, no overhead, three to five
mill in the bank piled up in gold earning, earning God knows what kind of old timey interest.
His friends Ron are so poor. There's a scene where they go to Harry's vault. First they
go to Ron's vault and Mrs. Weasley, she's got like eight fucking redheaded kids. She
goes in there and like gets everything they have and rakes it into a bag and it's like
27 or $36. It's something like that when you like equate it out to pounds from galleons. Don't ask me how I did that, but I did. And Harry watches that
happen, then they go to his vault and he tries to be quick so they don't notice
as he grabs a chunk of gold. Like he just drags out thousands of dollars into
his fucking satchel to buy his stuff. And it's like, why don't you...
He never helped the Weasleys?
He kind of does, but not really.
Like the only time he comes close to financially
helping the Weasleys, he buys the kids some chocolate
and book one from the cart.
And then again, and when the brothers,
when like the Weasley brothers want to loan the stuff.
It does not come close to financially helping the Weasleys.
No, no.
The second one.
Buys a piece of chocolate, no.
That's the whole Weasley brothers. You just created seven jealous chocolateless kids
because only one gets the bar. He funded these kids like magical store so he got them into
business but still Ron is his friend. Ron is the one who spends a whole year with a broken wand
at wizard school. Ron is the one whose robes for like the wizard prom
are so humiliating that he doesn't want to wear them.
You know?
And it's like, dude, you can't help your bro out
with a $40 wizard robe or like fucking 40.
Here's a shit head.
You're right.
Super shitty.
Like there's no way I can have my like poor bro showing up.
First of all, I'm Harry Potter.
I can have some ragged mufflin like bro showing up
all with his high waters on and his nikes from 1992
and what about hermione couldn't hermione just be like robes fixes yeah like so that's that's
another thing so what how is there how does an economy work at all because is there i mean that's
that's some drip that is a mirror for it look at those ruffles. It's terrible. I want to wear that in the Elden Ring.
That's a very...
That's like how I dress my character in Red Dead Redemption.
It's some fucking nonsense.
You're alright, boy.
I don't know how alchemy works exactly in the Harry Potter universe,
but I just choose to believe without any deep research that they can't make silver, bronze, and gold.
But you only need that insofar as it buys other things. that they can't make silver bronze and gold that those yeah but how does but you don't need but
you only need that insofar as like it buys other things so how do you have a a scarcity
how do you have scarcity when you could literally magic things out of air you know i don't think
they can magic those things but i don't i think there are certain things they can't magic out of
the air in general and i think that one of the things is this bias your food well you're exposed
to this bias from the books in the
movies where every wizard you see is like a master wizard.
Whereas you might imagine that the average wizard can't do
most of that shit. Like when we see Marvelo's family, like like
Tom Riddle's, like, like, like ancestors and stuff, like,
they're shitty wizards. They don't know how to do stuff. I
think that's part of it, too. And also was written by like,
not a great writer.
Yeah, it just it just seems like if let's say Dumbledore could
make food come out of thin air. Sure. Why doesn't he just do?
Yeah, yeah. But he doesn't like we're gonna have a feast. But
every kid in here is just paying me money to do this.
Well, I don't think he can make it up in air because like what
happens is the house elves cook all the food and then he Makes it appear from the kitchens on the plates
So I I am I am a little confused about how things are like come out of nothing
I don't like that. I don't think they can actually do that in a way that breaks the economy and they go to star trek post
scarcity commie wizards
Yeah, it just just seems like there's uh,'s the rules are a little inconsistent. You know, so
big time. Well, I don't know, there's tons of inconsistency.
She's not a great writer. Just just just not.
If we if we're gonna talk about one inconsistency that drives me
up the fucking wall, it's back to the future three. If you
western one, right? Yes, yes. Okay. So when he, when Marty McFly goes back to 1885,
he meets his great-great-grandfather
or something like that, right?
Okay.
His great-great-grandfather is married to a woman
that looks like his mom.
This does not make any sense.
No, it doesn't make any sense.
Because, yeah.
You know at the end when they're getting on the train,
there's that little boy pointing at his penis
inexplicably.
You ever see that little factoid?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He was trying to.
The actor has to pee, I think.
Yeah, yeah.
The little child actor has to pee.
And in the shot, he's like pointing at his penis.
Yeah, yeah.
He's like, yeah.
But I mean, it's a six-year-old.
And they're on probably take 20.
And he's like,
hey, I got I got I got to piss.
Yeah, I don't I don't like those movies. I like the first one.
But after that, I like the Harry Potter movies.
No, no, the Back to the Future movies.
I love the Harry Potter movies.
And I'll be honest.
I talked about this the other day.
They cast the new Harry Potter and like
they're the race swap and some of characters and and it's not even a small
race swap it's like a race swap that makes this story weird now because Snake is now a black guy
who gets made fun of he's going to be getting like bullied mercilessly by three or four white
white rich dudes who make fun of him being greasy and then and then then when he talks to their white girlfriend who's not a white
girlfriend anymore because Hermione is Mexican, Spanish, brown. They picked a brown Hermione.
I haven't even looked to see what the internet thinks of that yet, but they can't love it.
It's not going to be good.
Yeah, yeah. But the black Snape is the main problem because Adam Driver looks just like
Snape. Adam driver is a wonderful actor
He's pale as it can be he's got that big goofy nose
He like think of him in the Star Wars movie just that version of him. Yeah, I
So the most unbelievable thing about that is that the black guy
would get made fun of and and not
Be able to court a white woman, especially growing up.
That's sort of insane.
Look at this.
They look exactly the same.
Those are different people.
I mean, that's an AI interpretation of Adam Driver.
The hairline looks like something from my nightmares.
But I've seen real pictures of Adam Driver and of whatever the Snape guy's
name is. And that seems just like a giant fumble. Yeah. To have a guy who's like, hey,
guys, we're making this new show. Who are we going to cast? Oh, as luck would have it,
there's someone who's like weirdly a doppelganger of the very popular character. Should we go
with him? It's like, no, we're going to change from the ground up. Like we're just, we're changing the whole thing.
Okay.
All right.
Well, I never thought of-
I feel like the new actor's in a tough position too.
Like-
Oh, for sure.
But I mean, it's-
It's in a hole.
It's sort of why they never recast, you know,
the back to the future movies.
Like they didn't, never went back and did them because-
Zemeckis won't allow them to.
Zemeckis won't allow them to do it.
But JK Rowling was like,
all right, here's another billion, let's go.
So I feel like it's not old enough to need a remake.
Yeah.
I'm okay with it.
So, cause it's a TV show.
So they're going to be able to spend an entire season
per year of the Harry Potter year.
Look, I don't like that Snape thing.
And to me that genuinely sours it for me.
I don't know if I watch because of that,
because it's just weird to me, and it seems purposeless.
There's no reason to do that.
I'd be fine if you added like any number
of diverse cast and characters amongst the kids,
because we only get like 15 or 20, 30, 40 named kids
in a school of a thousand, 5 kids or something like that, right?
You have plenty of room to expand with extra characters and you can give them some like agency they can do stuff in this universe
But what this thing is just super weird
It could happen in the future right like it maybe something interesting how they have to retell the Harry Potter story. You mean
No, like I don't know what the TV show is going to have,
but it seems like we could move forward and not cover the same timeline.
Right. Oh, that's what I did.
No, no, no. They're telling the Harry Potter story.
The first the stories.
Yeah. I would rather hear about the new, you know, they've done that, though.
That's fantastic creatures and where to find them or whatever.
They all know that the Harry Potter universe.
Yeah, there's really.
But they're in America.
And yeah, it's all sorts of wacky adventures.
It's fun.
No. What do you write about this?
Like, I'm not as into Harry Potter as as you two.
But like, I would rather see a different
story within the Hogwarts universe, like whether it's a 200 years before prequel.
Who knows what problems they were going through then. Voldemortort wasn't even around like just there was a new big bad. Like I would. Yeah.
I would be fantastic piece and where to find them is it's what what if they did so I whatever.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What if they did a like a prequel sort of a backstory to Voldemort. So when he was just getting out of school,
and let's say he worked at the Ministry of Magic, and then there was a big conspiracy of, you know,
like they brainwashed him or something, and he was starting to be an orer.
Oh, that could be like he got MK ULTRAD.
But we know he didn't. We've got his full backstory. Like, I would watch the war,
the war all the time when he was was in charge because they often talk about the
Dark times when Voldemort and the death eaters were running rampant when they make it they sort of analogize it to like the blitz
Almost like like the battle for London or whatever when when the Nazis are overhead
You just have it you're cowering turning the lights out because they could come and torture your family tonight
That would be okay
But what I would really rather have if you're not gonna canonically go back and just do books one through seven,
show me Harry Potter as an or,
which is basically like magic FBI.
Like let me see Harry Potter go forward and be magic FBI.
And why don't you get Daniel Radcliffe?
Holy shit, he's the perfect age.
Get him in there.
What are we doing?
Get the band back together.
Like get them all back and do Harry Potter eight, nine, nine.
Well, I mean, they have the Cursed Child.
So that's that stage play.
And Tom Felton is actually playing, not Draco,
but well, he's playing Draco, right?
He should play Lucius in the new show.
They should have him come and play Lucius.
There's no reason not to cast him for that.
Well, yeah, yeah, that's true.
But I know he's playing, actually, is he playing, yeah, that's true. But the I know he's playing.
Actually, is he playing? No, it's in the curse child. So he's doing Draco. But Draco grown up.
Yeah. Yeah. I like the Harry Potter universe a lot. I read the books as they came out. And I
watched all the movies. I cried when Dobby died in the movie theater. course. You know, I was upset.
It was very sad.
But there's a, where did that beach,
that beach is actually a place.
So people go to that beach
and they leave like a rock for Dobby.
And Dobby beach location.
And there's like,
I like that one. Taylor, you wouldn't leave a rock for Dobby.
Do you know what he did for us?
Dobby doesn't know.
Oh, he's given Dobby clothes.
You know what I would, I would give Dobby like, uh, like panties.
Dobby has like a Captain America moment there at the end where he's like,
Dobby is a free elf, and he's here to fight for Harry Potter. Like fucking some shit up there for a
minute. It's great. Yeah, but in the truest sense, Dobby in that moment was kind of just like Samuel Samuel Jackson crying in Django when his slave master finally got shot.
He's like, no, no.
Dobby has magic that supersedes the magic of the wizards.
OK.
And being a free house elf, because he got that sock via Harry Potter,
that old dirty sock, he has magic that allowed him to go into that magically
warded home that the Death Eaters were holding out in and rescue everybody.
That's on the elves for being conquered if they were that inherently powerful.
Like that's not that's a hundred percent on them.
They get got.
Now they're made into slaves.
That's on you guys because you had magic teleportation, crazy powers.
That Yahoo.
But I don't think that does. God exists in this universe.
He has to write.
Evan does.
They went to that King's Cross station in the sky.
Remember?
Yeah.
Yeah.
God would have to be real because heavens real.
But it's like is like the Christian God because like they
celebrate Christmas.
Is there any other kind?
Is there?
Yeah.
Speaking of Israel, I keep getting,
speaking of Israel, seamless transition.
Yeah. From Baltimore to Israel, the real death eaters. I think they've been attacking Iran right now.
I think that Israel's bombing Iran, hitting those nuke sites.
They've been talking about it for weeks. The US has been saying,
we're not going to do anything,
but you never know what Israel might do.
They've been sort of saying they're going to do it
without saying they're going to do it.
Oh, we got video from Iran, explosions.
Look at that, explosions all over Iran.
That's what we need is another war in the Middle East.
Why does it feel like we're always
on the edge of World War II?
Three. Two, three.
Hey, I lost count.
Who counts for three ever?
Who knows at this point, you know?
Yeah, I can't remember the first three letters
of the ABCs.
Yeah, it feels like they are.
But yeah, like when it was Ukraine, Russia,
it was like, is this gonna escalate to World War III?
Where is this headed?
It seems like it's just gonna stay mostly between those two
for a while, I guess.
But now Israel's bombing Iran, which is what?
Gonna solidify partnerships that were previously fractured
in the Middle East because they all hate Israel.
Maybe.
Ideally, it would not pull us into it,
but who's to say it because it seems like
you know Israel Israel says jump in our politicians say how high it's not true. They asked us
to take part in these strikes that are going on right now. We declined. We said we'll pay
for it and that's it. We'll pay for it and we'll run cover for you at the UN, but that's it. Anyway, I know the check is late.
I'm so sorry, guys.
It's in the mail.
It's in the mail.
It's in the mail.
Yeah.
It was on the Air India flight.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm just I.
So anti-Israel.
I don't know.
I cannot.
I couldn't care less about the entire Middle East.
I don't know.
The entire Middle East.
I don't want anything.
How about you see? You don't see what they did?
We were watching that clip a couple days ago and it's, it's all this flour has been spilt out in
the dirt, like hundreds of pounds of flour, and they're just digging through the dirt,
like, like getting handfuls of dirty flour and putting it in their shirts to like carry away,
and it's so sad. And then out of nowhere, some Israelis start shooting them with machine guns. So everybody's running with their
shirts full of dirt flour, trying to get away. Those Israeli heroes were shooting to save their
own lives. It was them. It was them or the Ethiopian looking starving victims. And it was probably,
Kyle, it was probably that like, you probably aren't up
on this, but there's a new type of C4 that looks exactly like flour. And so
they were probably collecting weaponry. Yeah. And so they had to shut that right down.
What if it actually was though? Like what if we found out that what was
originally believed to be flour turns out to be a ammonium nitrate fertilizer.
Later on the refugees crafted into a bomb which was detonated outside this school you
see here.
Oh fuck, I was led astray.
If we saw that, we'd just get killed the whole time.
We'd have to reevaluate.
Don't you feel stupid?
Yeah, I'd feel real dumb.
But I'm like near positive it was flour.
Yeah, that shit's crazy.
We could make such good propaganda for the Israelis.
I wish they'd hire us.
See that right there, we just came up
willing to spend that whole situation.
Flour?
No, that's ammonium nitrate.
Didn't you hear?
Yeah, look up Snopes.
You know, you need, lie.
This isn't lies.
We control Snopes.
We control Snopes.
We create the Snopes lies.
Yeah, there is nothing for us in the Middle East. Every single
thing that happens in the Middle East, it's always a disaster. It's always terrible. It's never like
awesome new ice cream flavor discovered in fucking Lebanon. No, it's always something horrible.
And we've had enough. Enough. You guys handle your own shit.
Clearly, clearly you got some some ethnic tensions going back millennia. You guys are not our problem.
I've never been to Dubai.
So Dubai is like, it reminds me a lot of Vegas because there's a there's an air of like,
there's a big air of fakeness and
there's a there's an air of like there's a there's a big air of fakeness and nothing was here five minutes ago so like in the 60s it was literally a desert and now it's like the sprawling metropolis
and these super big high rises and billion dollar you know whatever's everywhere and it just seems
like i always think about dubai like this um it American ish and like westernized up until the point where you realize like, oh,
shit, things are a little different here. It's like
talking to Tom Cruise. Like if you talk to Tom Cruise, you go,
Oh, this is a pretty nice guy. Pretty nice guy. And then you
like tell him one thing and go, Oh, shit, he's fucking crazy.
Oh, I didn't I did not know this. So if you I think it was
in Dubai, like some some woman got sexually assaulted and then she went to jail, which is like and then you have these very middle really, really. Yeah, it is. And then they have like, really, really backwards laws and it and
with her? Yeah, yeah. Does she have? Does she have three witnesses? She's probably driving that harlot. There is,
you know, for every millionaire, there's there's a you know, 100
people living in abject poverty, but just in a slums outside of
town. So it's, it's just it's just really weird. I don't know.
I've never gotten like a good vibe from the place. It's cool.
It's cool to visit, but just like Vegas, you know,? Like in Vegas you don't want to stay there for more than
three days. You know, as if you're visiting. Nose bleeds. Exactly. Yeah. Oh yeah.
From the cocaine. Razor Booker. No, the desert air. The desert air. The desert
air, of course. It's very dry. This damned desert air. It's a dry heat. The desert air gets me going. Man, I feel like I'm wild on this desert air
Draining because of the day night cycle it it it's I watch this thing about nuclear submarines And they really do a good job of establishing this day night cycle, even though they're in the twilight of the deep ocean so like
They do things on a schedule. It's important that pizza party every night is is
Important so that you know that like this is nighttime
This is nighttime pizza, and it doesn't feel like you're eating pancakes at 9 p.m. They just doesn't do that
They work against that in every way they can everyone talks about there's no clocks in the casino.
That's an obvious one, but man,
just like those rooms black out completely
with the curtains.
You wake up and it's sort of like dim outside,
but the lights are so bright from the buildings that,
is that 6 a.m. or 6 p.m.?
I'm not really sure.
It just, you can melt away there,
especially if you're high on that desert air
Yeah, I do love blackout curtains though. Like it's it's great when you're trying to get rid of jet lag
So whenever I fly to UK
It's always like I need a day to just like get rid of lag because you're you're going over there It's usually like a six seven hour flight, but then you lose five hours
so you get there and you haven't slept at all. And then you're now you're in the middle
of the morning and night now you got to get to do work. So I love
hotels with blackout curtains. So but it does it does fuck you
up. You know, if you wake up and it's Oh, yeah, it's 6pm. And now
you don't know what to do with the rest of your day.
PM. And now you don't know what to do with the rest of your day.
Yeah. I've never been to Vegas. I don't know if I like gambling enough to really live it up the way everybody seems to love
gambling. I'd pick one of the simple games ever. I would learn
how to play craps because everybody at the craps table at
every casino I've ever been to those guys are fucking laughing.
They're joking. They're having a fun ass time.
And then like the really serious people are at the poker tables or the blackjack tables.
And I would I would be too intimidated because what I've learned from mostly
Kyle is like blackjack and stuff like that is a bit of a team game.
And so I would be worried that I would through ignorance.
Fuck it up for like the guy sitting to my right or sitting to my left. Small state. Nobody care. I would. That that I would through ignorance, fuck it up for like the guy sitting to my right
or sitting to my left.
I play small stakes, nobody would care.
I would just play.
That's the thing.
Like if you're playing like $2 blackjack,
nobody gives a fuck.
You know, there's lots of like weird games to learn.
There's three card pokers and Chinese pokers
and baccarat and stuff.
There's lots of silly games like that,
that goof around on.
But if we went there,
my goal would be to teach you how to play,
you know, Texas Hold'em. If I was with you, I would trust you to instruct me. Yeah, like that
game's so fun because everybody's sitting there like drinking and talking. If you're at a table
where nobody's talking, then it's no fun. But if everybody's sitting there having a good time,
it really is fun. I believe you. Yeah. I mean, I've been to Vegas plenty of times, but it's just like,
I've never gambled. Like, I think I've gambled like maybe once times, but it's just like, I've never gambled.
I think I've gambled like maybe once on a slot machine and I was like, okay, that's
good.
I had my Vegas gambling experience, lost five bucks and I'm good.
Slot machines seems like the most boring.
You don't get to do anything.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, there's nothing and it's all computerized and like a hundred percent.
You're just gonna, you're just flushing this money down the toilet.
Right.
I mean, Vegas is really good to people watch.
Like if you wanna look at just a variety of people.
So if you're looking at Las Vegas Boulevard,
like where the fountains of the Bellagio are,
so you have their street performers,
their strippers trying to get people into a club,
like literally smacking people in the ass as they go by. There's
these like Mexicans giving out like playing cards for hookers
you can get in your room. They go like that. They don't speak
English, but they Yeah, there's and they're at every probably
2020 ish feet. And then you have the weird tourists who bring
like their kids so they'll have like strollers at like
1 30 in the morning walking down Vegas Boulevard and like what what is
happening I don't this is great this is like every GTA NPC just on one street
it's a great environment walking just walking down the boulevard there because
you smell weed and the women aren't wearing much and occasionally you'll
just see some random titties get flashed and everybody seems they everybody's having a good time. Like you don't see the depressed loser out there. It's it's everybody's up
Everybody's doing good when they're you know walking around outside and then there's street acts that are usually pretty fun
There's those guys that dress they have the transformers like the you know
The cartoon and they like turn into the truck and just drive and they hop up and transform it to a man
It's great. I don't even know how they do it. No, that sounds fun. Yeah, you should go also. There's also the art.
So you would hear, let me sell it to you. The buffets are genuinely one of the most impressive
things in the world. They drop, you know, 50 to $150 for these all you can eat buffets and you
get what you pay for. So it'll be all you can eat buffets and you get what you pay for.
So it'll be all you can eat crab and lobster and seafood and steaks and rib eyes and just
fantastic.
As far as the eye can see.
I would take them for a fight.
I could lose $400 at the casino and take them for a ride.
There's like a top 10 list of like, of course there is of like, but there's a, there's a,
there's a plethora of wonderful, all you can eat buffets.
And it's like, oh, go to this, you gotta go to this one.
No, the one at the wind, no, the one at the Bellagio.
No, go over here to this poker room.
They have the best thing.
They do brats, all that.
Like it's like that.
It's fun to do.
I would want hot crab.
Not the cold crab.
The shows are really good too.
Like even if you're not,
you might think you're not a Britney Spears,
but when you see your concert,
you're like, fuck, that was great. They put
on a goddamn show.
You know, it's really good. The so I went like years ago, but I
saw David Copperfield and David Copperfield, you know, old, old
time, like kind of old school magical act. And, you know, it's
a pretty small theater in the MGM, but he's been doing it
forever. And I went in there and I thought,
okay, this is gonna be kind of, you know,
kind of hokey and, you know, it's not gonna be very good.
And I came out of there, I'm like,
that was one of the best shows I've ever seen in my life.
It's so crazy.
Like the stuff is, you know,
he's definitely a master of his craft.
He'll take like a beach ball
and then he'll throw it out in the audience.
And he goes, I want one person to catch it.
And that person throws it to another person.
And then it goes like four layers deep.
And then he brings that person on stage,
and then he goes, what do you have in your pocket?
Or something like that.
And then at the end, he has this big thing
where he's levitating off the stage
and flying around the room.
It's very, very cool.
He flew around the room himself?
Yeah.
How did he do that? Magic.
It's actual magic. Yeah, he's harnessed the power of flight for himself.
I think it's wires.
I like that in sci-fi and fantasy, by the way way when the bit is that the guy has magic and he chooses to become a magician like a show
Because he could just abracadabra and everybody's like wow I saw the guy in half great
But he's really sawing the people in half or something always like that looks like that. What is it the prestige or whatever?
You know they think he's his magic, but he's actually just creating a perfect double of himself and killing himself every night.
Yeah, that was a good that was a great movie.
Sorry, spoilers.
It would be it's actually way it's way less impressive to be magic and put on a magic show than it is to not be magic and put on a magic show.
But what if you had to kill yourself every night?
Yeah, but it was always like a different version.
It's kind of impressive to have magic though.
Like, oh, I just think that's cool.
It's cool to have magic.
But if your whole bit is you're doing magic on stage and you are magic, you're not even
like you're not doing the David Copperfield like playthrough in your head of like, to
make this look real, I have to do this and I have to do it from this angle.
And I have to have a person who kind of is this archetype. So I can guess correctly,
like you don't have any of that lead up. You're like, what am I going to do for my show? I'm
going to magically saw this lady in half. Yeah. Magically. Yeah. Like, and then you don't. So
it's just not as impressive. It's like, yeah, if you were like, if you, it's the same way,
like if you had super strength and you were the best lineman
in NFL history, that's less impressive than just being a guy
who's an awesome lineman because he works real hard.
Yeah, but I mean, let's say if you're in a Harry Potter
universe and then you become a magician in the muggle world,
like does that, is that, does that cheapen it?
Or are you like opening these people up to actual magic?
You know, like is, I don't see that as cheap.
You're born with it, you know?
Have you guys seen a real magician, Tyler?
Not a real one.
Maybe at a birthday party when I was like,
like a real actual magic?
Never a real deal one.
I have very little exposure to warlocks.
I went to a show and never seen a wizard in real life.
And it was really impressive.
I was young, but one of the things I remember
is he flew a light bulb around the room.
It's a big room.
There's hundreds of people sitting there.
And the light bulb came close to us
and we weren't even that close to the stage.
And I was like, and the way it moved,
it wasn't like on a long string.
Like it would move and stop on a dime and then zip somewhere else
I'm like, I I never did figure it out
Um, I don't think I have seen a magician in person actually I
Am not drawing a blank. I don't think I have no I've never seen a real one
You should know real one. I want so Chris
and
and
Vegas and Chris
Angel was the complete opposite of David Copperfield. So he was
he was about an hour late to his own show. And people were getting
real belligerent in the audience and his show was absolute trash.
Like, yeah, like the mind failed you. Yeah, mind freak mind
freak done done freaked me out of my money. So it was I can't I
don't know if he's still doing a show. He might be. Um, but it's just,
whatever you saw on the show,
you realize that like everything on the show is just very, I mean,
it's obviously very scripted and, uh, and made to for, for that,
but it doesn't translate well to stage at all.
That was funny. Like,
I would have gone better if he was on time or did he just lose the crowd
immediately?
He was losing the crowd pretty, pretty quickly.
Um, but the fact that he also on top of that was, was late and people were, you
know, these people were drinking all night and they wanted to see something fun.
And then they were sitting in their seats for, for an hour.
You know, I like the idea that the crowd.
Like had an informal contract where they were going to fuck up this performer for fucking up their night.
Take his jacket. Don't give it back to him.
I remember watching the other end.
I remember watching the mind freak show on, I don't even remember.
Maybe MTV. I don't remember what channel it was on, but the mind freak show,
true TV, maybe like way back in the 20 plus years ago. And he would always be walking there and always he's looking so casual
with his eyes only like halfway open. Like we're going to, I'm going to find, I'm going to pick a
random group of people. And then he'd like walk past 60 people to find the closest black family.
And it was like, like, oh, really? You're just
randomly picking people again. And you're always going to black people who absolutely
love magic. Like, come on. Like he never stopped and was like, I'm going to do tricks for this
fucking Vietnamese family. They'd be like like you tricked me. This is not real.
Well it's kind of like the opposite to David Blaine.
You know like the whole magic of David Blaine was that like I'm going to
I'm just going to do this thing for a very long time.
Like I'm just going to stand up for four days and like okay cool.
I like David Blaine.
I'm going to be underwater for a week and a half.
I love that, yeah.
I saw David Blaine's interview about when he held his breath.
At the time, it was the world record for holding your breath.
It's been since beaten, I think.
But he talked about, he's like,
well, I was looking at how to like cheat it.
And we were looking at installing a device in my windpipe.
And then there were these rebreathers's and we finally decided the best way
to do it was just to do it for real. So he starts doing these breathing exercises with deep sea
divers and he trains for like a year or two and he brought and he talks about like what he was
going through mentally breaking the record because he I don't remember what it was but it's like 18
minutes or something stupid. It's crazy long. He went with like holding his breath. But he talks about having
hallucinations and going through this crazy shit. And he talks about he's like, the thing
is I'm an illusionist. So nobody believed I really did it.
That is, you know, risk in the trade. You make your whole when you make all your bones
off of like throwing a deck of cards at a deli window and then the seven
of hearts.
I was incredible.
How did he do that?
I don't know.
I don't know.
And I liked that one.
I love that one.
Yeah, just check the longest breath hold.
2021 a Croatian guy did it for 24 minutes and 37 seconds.
How many 24 minutes and how much brain damage did he have after that?
Like he wasn't OK after that.
It said he pre breathed 100% oxygen before the record attempt.
I guess that's allowed.
That seems a little little cheap, but that's still insane.
Like it is.
He also tried to break the non oxygenated record,
but he didn't get it.
He stopped at eight minutes 58 seconds which
is still wild. David Blaine's record is 17 minutes. That was David Blaine without oxygen.
Okay. Oh okay. Every once in a while I'll just randomly decide to time how long I can hold my
breath on my phone. Do you guys ever do that? Like every
couple years? I'll just random. I used to do it tons as a kid. Like for some reason,
it was something I, I must've watched a movie or something. And so when, when there was
like downtime in class, I would watch the clock and hold my breath to see how long I
could hold my breath. It's crazy. The difference as an adult versus being a kid. Cause I remember
as a kid, it was like, I thought a minute was like a crazy amount of time
to hold your breath straight.
And then even now, like my fat ass out of shape,
like I can easily do 90 seconds plus
every time I like do little try.
It's probably been a year since I've been high enough
on my power to be like, I wonder how long I can hold my breath.
Five dollars if you can hold your nose for 90 seconds. Mouth closed, nose held.
Hold my nose?
Because I'm trying to avoid cheating, right? We can all do the thing where we barely breathe.
Okay, how about it? So I have to go, but before I do that, I think I can do that.
Let's say you get your mouth closed, hold you know, I'll put my mouth on the microphone
so you can hear if I'm if I'm breathing. Okay, I don't want
that. I want to see you don't want ASMR mouth noises. I do.
Okay, I'll pay for that. Okay, well, we'll do it. We'll do a an
honor system here. I'll tell you if I breathe. Okay. Pitch that
nose. What do you want the nose pinch?
If your nose is a pinch, this isn't even a thing.
Okay. Three, two, one.
Someone time it.
So I'm in 45 seconds now. I'm going to give him credit for like
42 starting.
Okay.
I'm just looking at the recording time in the top left.
He started at like three hours, five minutes and 33 seconds.
And it's now three hours, five minutes, 52 seconds.
A lot of times in movies when they're having to dive to the bottom of the pool,
there's a mission impossible where Tom Cruise has to hold his breath and do this crazy thing.
There's a liquid cooled server he has to swim down into.
And I hold my
breath along with him and I can't hold my breath as long as Tom Cruise. Just the excitement of
watching the movie has my heart beating a little but I'm like he's swimming though. Any sort of
physical activity just ruins my ability to hold my breath. I could do like two lengths of a pool, like a backyard
pool. And when I come up the other end, I'm like, but yeah, I've got Woody's probably
the best at this.
I used to be good at it. I don't know if I'm good now. Yeah, I used to train that in swimming.
It'd be so funny if he made his camera freeze and just left and like five minutes from now
All right
so I had him in about
42 to 55 one minute 13 seconds ish. What'd you get? Tom Cruise beat you again? Yeah based damn it on the
Timer it was like
Minute 15 or so but pretty good pretty good. Pretty good. Yeah, pretty good pretty pretty solid guys
There'll be no fiber headed your way, of course.
Tom Cruise held his breath for six and a half minutes underwater for a scene in Mission Impossible
Rogue Nation. Six minutes. That's science-ology, man. That's crazy. Well, Freddy, I know you got to leave.
Where can everyone find your newest escapades? Go to youtube..com slash to barish you just look up flooded McLaren p1, you'll find me
There you go. That's an amazing
Thanks a lot guys. All right, take it easy. All right. Take care. Bye. What was the longest you ever?
Held your breath like in like your swimming prime or did you not even record?
We never did it with that activity
Like we would do things where we were allowed one lap,
one breath per lap, like that's the thing we would do.
And that we'd go on for like eight laps.
But I never like just held my breath underwater for time.
How long is a lap as far as like time, like 30 seconds?
Well, that wasn't a fast lap.
It would be like, let me think.
Two laps is about 50 seconds at race pace.
One lap was probably like 30 seconds a lap.
Dude, doing that eight times in a row, that's,
that's kind of got to suck by the end.
It used to be in shape. Yeah. But like, there is a pride thing to it.
Cause some people you do a flip turn, so there's no breath there.
And some people would like touch and do like a turn fit
for butterfly, not for freestyle.
And it's like, you fucking push.
You failed.
Everyone knows you failed.
We all saw it.
I didn't want to be that guy.
That's fair.
Yeah, I just, I'm so distance from the swimming world.
My brother was, my youngest brother was on swim team as like a young kid. And he was really,
really good. He was winning meets often. And then he got to the age where like, like middle school
age, where he was like becoming a man more and would have to wear those jammers, which are like,
it's like a speedo that is also, it's a shorts length speedo and he was uh i think like
one of his friends or something like said that was gay and that was all it took for him to be
i'm pivoting like i'm pivoting to a different sport and it was i wish i had jammers
we were the tiny little bikini style back in the 90s.
Yikes.
Yeah.
That would drive me away from the sport.
You'd shave everything that bathing suit didn't cover.
Oh, I would hate, I wouldn't want to do the shaving.
I think Kyle's the inverse of that.
He shaves only what that bathing suit covers.
Yeah, that's what I do.
You trim it down under the bathing suit area.
But my legs. Hydrodynamic clean shaven.
That's all.
Melt it off with chemicals.
So you're just smoother than a baby's bottom.
I didn't want to take it to the baby's bottom.
I was going to try and go anywhere else.
Fair.
That's where you arrived.
That's where I stayed.
Yeah.
Damn it.
Yeah. I tried that in where I, that's where I stayed.
Yeah. I tried that in there once that you recommended me and like, because of your,
uh, insistence of like, you know, use it as directed, but don't keep it on for more than
six minutes or you're going to get chemical burns. I was like standing in my bathroom
naked, like everything covered, like my nut sack has a bunch of fucking chemicals
with a pressure washer ready to instant remove.
Yeah.
I think I got like four or five minutes in and I'm like, ah, I don't have the stones
for this sort of like, I rinsed it off too early.
And then a lot of the hair did come off.
But then it almost looked like I had like, like, like a cancer kid's head before they fully shave.
Like a dog with mange.
Yeah, it was like, okay, most of the hair is falling out, but there's still some, some,
you know, really long ones that haven't.
So I stand by what I said, because there's that moment where you've got the timer going on the
sink. And I recommend four to five minutes for the first coat. And you're like, if you start dealing,
if you're like, okay, it's time to get in. But then you need to take off your coat. And you're like, if you start dealing, if you're like,
okay, it's time to get in, but then you need to take off your socks and then like, oh,
let me hang this towel here. So it's there when I get out. And all of a sudden, 45 extra seconds
have gone by and those seconds matter. You need to be ready when the five minutes gives up to not
only get into the shower, but like start scrubbing that shit. Yeah. Water's already running like,
yeah. And it's not going to take all the hair off the first coat, but by the third coat, the shower, but like start scrubbing that shit. Water's already running. Like, yeah. And it's not going to take all the hair off the first coat,
but by the third coat, the third, like time you do this, like the next shower,
everything will be gone, like melted off.
Can you do it three times in one day or you got to do it over?
You're going to get chemical burn. I feel like if you do that,
like maybe my skin is just extra sensitive and,
but it's sensitive skin you're using it on.
You're putting the chemical on your balls that melts hair.
So I like to take my time and, and because I have burnt myself before and it's like
It's like a stingy sunburn kind of feeling it's not good. I want that
Is that your two for hair removal to this day nair?
No, I usually just use a razor but but you know if you if you're going for uh, for for for
All the way then the nair is the way to go and for you, especially if you're going for all the way, then there's the way to go.
And for you, especially because you've just, you know, you blow so much money
on Razors if you had to hack through all that.
Yeah, it's pretty hairy down there.
You just use a hedge trimmer.
You want an indiscriminate chemical attack on that hair.
You can't go in there, shoot a hair at a time.
You got to genocide a sniper. You need a napalm.
Do you ever let it go for a long time and then like you feel some of those hairs on
your scrotum and it's like, how is this such a brambly thick hair growing out of like what
is a bag of skin? Have you ever had those crazy thick
scrotum hairs?
No, I don't get those.
Yeah, well guess what? Everybody in the audience is saying, I know what you're talking about.
They're leaving comments at this very moment.
They're so coarse and thick that they poke through your jeans sometimes.
And it's not most of them. It's just like you feel it and it's like this feels like
this is the girth of a beard hair.
Now what the fuck is going on here?
I don't have beard hair on my balls. I've got little wispy.
No it's mostly regular hairs but every once in a while you feel it and you know like you
got it there's like a tuft of hair sometimes and you can like like roll your fingers around
it.
No.
Yeah.
No.
No you're the weird one here dude. Yeah all right all right I just just say it you know. Yeah. No. No, you're the weird one here, dude. All right. All right. I just just say, you know,
big strong. I googled Harry's scrotum and it disappointed. I don't know that this is a real
thing. I don't think you should have googled that. They weren't real scrotums. I didn't learn anything.
Oh, they were fake things and stuff like musical. Oh, cartoons, key chains. I know about newicles yeah that's
what you do for like help your dog's confidence after they're castrated yeah
you get it genuinely it's literally now that you said it every I've heard of them
yeah yeah I'm thinking about getting Toby some newticles this poor little bag
shrunk up to nothing it's pitiful oh like it almost like turned it like an
Audi belly button like it's just gone I'm thinking about popping another one in mine. Yeah, third one. Yeah, it's an alpha move. That's a sigma move. That is a sigma
male move to get a muticle. I get a big one. I get like an ostrich egg.
Actually, no, that seems all. You wanted to match? You want like a third that's bigger?
I want it to be sort of. No, you're right.
It should. You know what? I think maybe get them, but get, replace them, right? Just get
two brand new big boys and inject testosterone. I genuinely don't know from a medical standpoint.
What need do we have of testicles if we're injecting testosterone? What else do they
provide? I know sperm sperm
But okay, let's get past that because I don't want any of that Anyway, what else do testicles do besides make sperm and provide testosterone?
Medically speaking like could I have them removed and just inject testosterone and be none the worse. They probably only Jay does it
She has testicles. They're just shrunk. Oh, I'm mixed up then who's the other one?
I think she has testicles. They're just shrunk up from the estrogen.
Oh, I mixed it up then.
Who's the other one?
The inverse of that.
Oh, you're talking about the,
you're talking about the trans man
who's all bearded up and stuff?
He's totally masculine vibe.
Well, he's just got a big old lady dick now
from all that testosterone.
Right, I'm just saying he's living your dream.
What was my dream?
What did I say?
You live without testicles as a man. Oh I say? Have your testicles removed surgically so that you could
I guess that's a mentally ill person. I didn't want to like go insane. Oh right your dream's not that of a mentally ill person at all.
Well no keep in mind we're replacing we're replacing my standard guys with some big old clankers. Not only are they huge, but when they bang
together we get some noise. All right. Right. Right. It's like that office. I don't think
it's a good idea, but I, you know, have you considered getting eight of them? Kyle, just
what am I dog? Yeah. The office toy has, You know what, I would get, I would get. Oh,
you're talking about the whole click, click, click, click, click thing. I'm just thinking
outside the box here. I'm a big brain guy. It's a big brain guy. I would get a dozen
small testicles. It was like a bag of marbles. Yeah. Okay. Got a couple of D20s in there as well.
I have edged dice in there. It's very uncomfortable. Oh, turn it into
a magic eight ball. Put a little window so you can see. So you can see in. Put a window
on my bag with a man that I have to shake it. And it's like, you know, I could have
girls where it's like the new magic. Are you going to give head tonight? Unlikely. Fuck, shake it again.
The new Magic 8 Ball is going to be AI. They're not even going to have anything
floating around in a goo. You're just going to have a little screen that you
activate by shaking a thing.
Yeah. The whole point of it is that it's a tactile physical thing.
Well, the AI could find a... You remember like I never had a magic eight ball,
but I remember at a friend's house, he had one and it just would not work. Like something broke
on it. And so only like the two same faces would ever show up. It's like, it seems unlikely.
Seems unlikely. Yes, without doubt. Okay. Well, those are our two options. So there's no funds, you know, flip a coin, eh? Yeah.
What a fun thing. Do you think the guy I guarantee the guy that
invented the magic eight ball had a bunch of naysayers around
saying this is the dumbest thing I've ever imagined. And he's
like, you have to believe me.
And then the guy who invented the moon boots got way too much
encouraging because that is the dumbest thing a
Hundred percent fucking scammer and if there was some form of class-action lawsuit that I could
Were you scammed by moon boots in 1997 on?
Were you led to believe that you could soar through the air just like the kids in the commercial you may be entitled the compensation
the kids in the commercial, you may be entitled to compensation.
Because that was gay. That's fucking pump up Nikes, too.
They made those things like they were going to give me some air.
Dude, I had those in Hawaii and I love them.
I love them, dude.
So I different people have different preferences in their hockey skates,
but I like mine really, really tight.
I like all the ankle support and it felt secure.
And I felt like my footwork was better with tight. So I I pull my really, really tight. I like all the ankle support and it just felt secure. I felt like my footwork was better with tight.
So I'd pull my laces so tight,
I used a tool to pull the laces like kids do.
And then I would pump up the sides and pump up the sides
and I'd sit there like just outside the face-off circle
and some asshole would tap the deflate with his stick.
It's like, ah, boiled by the opposing team.
Oh, remember the Marty McFly
show on a ship?
Yeah.
Do you remember the Back to the Future sneakers,
how they would like lace themselves up and do the whole bit?
They made those like five years ago.
They're not as good, but they're close.
Like in the movie, they really are aggressive about the way they
and like security your feet.
But the real ones go really slowly and sort of like get tired get it though
You just sort of pull them all wider. It seems like Texas easy to make
Because it's pretty neat I like the idea of sneakers that do something
Hmm
Other than just sit on your foot like he's back. All right, you mad I
Like the sneakers that are like illegal to use in races because there's so much better than everyone else's sneakers
I think that's dope
Sneakers at what now? Oh, yeah, they have sneaker tech
That absorbs the energy from the impact and launches you forward and they're
breaking marathon records to the point where now you're not allowed to wear the super sneakers.
It's just like a better foam and design. They're really thick on the bottom and they're pretty
dope. Whoa. Zach found them. There's a short video like above his link that'll show how
they work.
I saw that. Those are some ugly sneakers. Yeah, they're pretty ugly. You know,
they're from the future though. Sensibilities are different then.
Aren't they from the past at this point? Or what year did they travel to?
Oh, I don't remember. 30 years from like 80, like now, like 10 years ago or something.
Like 10 years ago? That's what I thought.
Yeah, something like that. I thought they went 30 years into the future and the movies
from 85 or 86. So. Yeah. But I don't remember. I really didn't like the later movies. I just
like the first one, you know, him trying not to fuck his mom and Doc Brown being hilarious.
But I didn't like when they went through the
whole Donald Trump thing and then the Western one was just garbage. Anything that I don't
know. I have sensibilities about Westerns maybe, maybe just lame like that.
You're right. I want to disagree with you, but you're just right. I sometimes I like
try to convince myself a movie or properties better than it is, but the first one was great and it fell off.
Yeah. I was done with the story. Well, they will bet the future. So yeah.
So the premise of the second one, partially speaking, is that Biff,
the bully from high school from his dad's high school, um,
got the Almanac, the sports Almanac. And he's been using it his whole life basically
to become a Donald Trump-esque billionaire
with all of his winnings.
And he's the villain in the future.
He was known as the world's luckiest man
because he like never lost a sports bet.
And I would, oh man, I would be tactically losing sometimes.
Wouldn't you?
Yeah, you'd think that makes sense. But
that also comes up in the Stephen King book, 11, 22, 63,
because he's gone to the past. The way he's chosen to make money is through gambling, but he wins too much and they come after him.
What is he doing in like underground illegal circles?
He's East Coast.
There's nothing else to do.
Oh, I didn't know that.
I thought there were always states that had...
I don't know.
Atlantic City was legal through my whole life, but this was the 60s.
Yeah, so I'm not sure when it became legal.
Yeah.
He's having to deal with semi-nefarious, like back alley gambling establishments as
he goes.
Well, that's a terrible place to win too much.
That would be a that would be a fun like, you know, to have all that to have all that
information and be to be the luckiest man in the world.
Like you'd not only want to win your bets, but you'd want to start like a program where
you've taught people to win their bets and just bullshitted.
You got to believe you got to see it.
You just make it up.
It doesn't matter.
You know, what's going to happen.
You got to tell them how to analyze teams and pretend like there's like game
theory and statisticians working for you.
But really you just got the almanac.
Yeah, really just have an answer sheet.
If you could do it with stocks, they'd let you keep going.
Yeah.
If you just had, if you had the stock and you would have been way richer, you
could do all sorts of insane things.
You could buy low and sell high and you could, you could mess with futures.
Any, any number of ways to just make insane amounts of money and become a
fucking trillionaire.
Are there maxes in gambling?
insane amounts of money and become a fucking trillionaire. Are there maxes in gambling?
Like if, if Elon Musk was like, I want to put $5 billion on the Florida Panthers to,
you know, win this series and win the Stanley Cup this year, would, would like casinos take
that or would they be like, Oh no, no, no.
Maximum is a million, 2 million, whatever the number is.
Sports gambling is weird because they're like, it seems to be a bit of a science and you
would, you, you do see really big bets.
Like half million, million dollar bets on prize fights and stuff go down.
But when someone like Dana White wants to go there and do play blackjack for like 50,000
or a hundred thousand dollars a hand, they're often in like special side away private VIP rooms
where certain casinos will take that action and certain won't.
Like Phil, Phil Ivy, famous Texas Holden player is one of the best.
I think he's the best Texas Holden player in the world.
I always thought he was. He was just incredibly accomplished.
And he's a black guy, right?
Black guy always has his mouth open. He's the one that Polk was talking about when he was on was just incredibly accomplished. He's a black guy, right? Black guy always has his mouth open
He's the one that Polk was talking about when he was on a month or so ago
who took took all those Chinese casinos for it was 9 or 12 million because
They were card edging or whatever you call it Like there was a particular brand of poker cards that were misprinted in a way that you could memorize the backs of them and know
What was there and oh he would go to the casino and he say, look, I want to play.
I think it's backer at, but I could be wrong.
I want to play my genre, whatever the game is.
I want to play this game with this deck.
I want a private room.
I want three private dealers who can sub in and sub out.
I want champagne here.
I want the green M&Ms. This is
Lucy. She's my partner. She plays with me. I bank. She bets. By the way, she's an expert at reading
the cards. He's brought in someone who's like, he's good at it, but it's all she does. He took
them for like tens of millions, like nine or 12, 20 million, something crazy. They actually won a court settlement against him and they started garnishing
his world series of poker winnings and like they're getting their money back from
him. So now he only plays in like this other, I say now,
I don't follow it like super closely,
but now I only see him playing in like these Asian tournaments and cash games.
Like he's not on India, like a American scene.
It's definitely not cheating if you ask me.
Because-
Yeah, that seems crazy that they won against him
because they made a mistake with the cards.
He told them to pick those cards
and those were like legit cards,
but he had found a secret about that card
that they didn't know.
He didn't go into, it's what some people will actually do.
Like, and you've seen this, they'll mark the cards that they're currently playing with so that if they see that
card over by you they know that's an ace and they know you have an ace which is a huge amount of
information in a game where each player has two cards. Well that's obviously cheating but it
doesn't seem like what this guy did which was just exploiting a mistake. That's not cheating.
That's on the fucking casino.
That's right.
I would feel cheated though.
If I lost to him and then I found out he knew what my cards were the whole time, I would
feel cheated.
When he's playing against the house, there's no player.
It's all against the casino.
I follow, but I'm just trying to apply the same morality.
It's easy to root for the individual over the company, because that's my like need your reaction to.
But if I try to think about what's right versus wrong,
forgetting the fact that one's a person and one's a corporation to say you have
to play with what's basically a marked deck and I know it and you don't.
And then I beat you for what would you say? Tens of millions of dollars.
Yeah. It was like 12 12 mil, something like that.
Let me see.
It feels like he cheated.
And I know it's a corporation, but cheating's cheating.
Baccarat, by the way, 9.6 mil.
And 2012, him and his partner, Chang Yin Sun,
won $9.6 million playing Baccarat
at the Borgata Casino in Atlantic City.
And that was just one of his like nights.
Like you got to keep in mind, like he was he was doing this everywhere
that would, you know, do that.
Isn't one of the simpler games where I only know how to play Texas hold them.
I'm not qualified to talk about even blackjack.
I don't know how to play at a higher than just silly tourist level.
Hold them. I think I know even a little bit about and other poker based games like a stud and draw in Omaha and a
little same. Which one is the one where you get five? Stud. Stud? Or what is it? Our draw is also.
Okay I should have known that but like what amongst poker pros, what do they see as like the game that best elucidates your skill?
Cause I know I've seen like enough Magnus Carlsen shit where apparently in the
chess world, it's like classic chess,
like classical style chess is where you really separate the men from the boys.
It's not speed chess.
It's like where you are using your entire brain with plenty of time to analyze and think.
And you know, maybe I shouldn't do that. Like you're not pressed. And so they see that as like the
ultimate clash. I think they would say there are these tournaments. First of all, it would be a
tournament that is high stakes. So it'd be 10 to $50,000 entry fee. So you get real people who are
playing in a serious way. But then they play a mixed game
and it's they mix Texas Hold'em, Omaha, and a couple other games. I think it's four different
games and it rotates. I think that's probably the most difficult discipline of poker and you would
imagine that the people who are best at that are probably best at poker, period. But the most popular game has always been Texas Hold'em.
And I think that's where it makes a lot of sense
for people to put their time into Texas Hold'em
because if you're going, the real money isn't to be had
necessarily winning tournaments and cash games
unless you legitimately are the best player in the world
or one of those best players in the world.
But as the sponsorship deals,
that's the way when you're not paying your entry fees anymore, when your your losses are being covered and you're getting paid a salary because
you're directing gamblers to whatever website. Like when that was going on,
that's when those people were getting actually rich,
like plenty of people win $10 million in a tournament every year.
Like like people, they track people's career earnings and you can see whether they're up or down
online, for example.
There are guys who have gone up $16 million losing streaks and it's like, oh, he's just
done.
But the guys that were shuffling people toward, they get sponsorship money was the thing.
I don't know if, I know it's not as big as it once was.
I'm sure YouTube poker players probably do pretty well
in that regard, but until they opened the US up
and like make it legal again,
I don't know if they're gonna have another boom like that.
It was a huge industry.
I don't remember how much money was the online poker
industry was worth, but I thought it was billions.
It was crazy.
Everybody was playing in the early 2000s.
We were all obsessed.
Everybody knew was obsessed.
Like my bosses played, my coworkers played,
like everyone was into it.
Do you think if they like made the laws surrounding it
more lax, it would return to that?
Yeah. Oh yeah.
If they just made it so that all 50 states could just log into a FDIC sort
of guaranteed insured kind of gambling website where you didn't know you were getting ripped
off and you could always have your money protected, you didn't have to deal with like the Bahamas
or some offline account or some sketchy bullshit or using Amazon cards to move your money or whatever. And then you also allowed like advertising for that gambling.
It would just create a cycle of money.
You know, people would watch people play online and on TV and those people would
go online and play and then it would just go round and round forever.
It's a huge, it's a huge industry.
Are we a weird country? Like, is this totally legal in like Europe and other
places or is it?
I don't know. I don't, I don't know. I really don't.
I think if poker is such an American thing, I've never thought about that before.
Like maybe it's, maybe that's just, you know, Hollywood influencing me.
Well, it's the weird, it's weird the way we,
we legislate around gambling anyway, because
we have state lotteries.
It's perfectly fine to bet on the horses, but you can't bet on the football game unless
you're in this state, then you then you absolutely can.
But not that football.
That's European football.
You can't bet on that here.
Yes, it's just like it's this wishy washy bullshit.
Not only that, obviously, there's Indian casinos.
And then there's places like Las Vegas and Atlantic City and Reno
Well, that is the whole state of Nevada, right?
But there's also like riverboat casinos. There's also
Casinos where they have those they yeah
In Missouri and then there's also like offshore casinos where we just drive three miles offshore and now we can gamble out here
It's like we're just do it.
Yeah. What are you doing? Make a decision. Either make it so it's totally illegal or make it so
it's totally legal. I want Sin City America. I want legalized prostitution, legalized marijuana,
legalized machine guns, legalized gambling, all that stuff. It should be like Grand Theft Auto
when you walk out. Well, yeah, they just sell those at the store late
Like like like candy
It's just being polite. It's just being polite. It's about it's about hearing protection. It's not about I saw those assholes
That Democrat was like who lobbied to put the silencers
Bill thing in the bill was that was that the assassins lobby and I'm on the NFA
the bill was that was that the assassins lobby and I'm on the NFA subreddit and they're like you're that guys were assassins
and everybody's like fucking cool.
Hell yeah.
Like it's just it is a cool thing.
Why is it going quiet enough to be polite not annoy your
neighbors and not hurt your ears?
It's not making it whisper quiet except for sometimes some
very specific instances.
I suppose.
Yeah, when you stack all your buffs, 45 gets real quiet.
Forty five sounds like a paintball gun.
Like I had that.
Yeah. Twenty two goes just super, super quiet.
And you can in addition to suppressors, you can get these things called wipes.
It's like a it's a plastic contact lens type looking thing
that it goes in the tip of the suppressor
and you sort of put it on there
and then you screw a thing on top to hold it in place
and it creates a solid seal at the end of the barrel
that you only break with the first bullet.
So that first shot, you also feel the threads
are the baffles up with thread cutting oil.
It's this thick gooeyey oil. And all those things
combined together create like a really quiet first shot.
Like the CPU overclocking of quiet shots.
Yes. That's exactly what you're doing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's super, super, super crazy quiet.
22s, anything subsonic can be made very, very quiet.
22 subsonic? Some are,, very quiet. 22 subsonic?
Some are, some aren't, it depends what ammo you buy.
Okay, the only one off the top of my head
I knew was subsonic was 45.
It's not always subsonic, is it?
It's most of the time subsonic,
but you can of course buy some plus P45 ammo
that'll break the sound barrier.
I know there is supersonic 45, but
if you went to the store and bought 45, you would almost certainly be buying subsonic
45. Like FMJ, target ammo, that's all subsonic for the 45. It's like 700 feet per second or
something. Maybe not that low. It's low. Well, I'm glad silencers are back.
We'll see if the big beautiful bill that robs our grandchildren blind goes through or not. But don't worry Kyle there's plenty of
money in there for Israel you know because they're popping off right now.
Yeah that's crazy hopefully that doesn't escalate even more but it always
it's a good thing. It always feels like we're right on the cuff. They're enriching uranium, they needed a good blowing up.
That's my genuine feelings.
Look, I don't like Israel anymore than the-
We're okay with them enriching uranium, right?
No.
Trump's made a deal where they're allowed
to have nuclear power plants.
No, they're enriching it too far.
It's like the difference between 87 octane
and some 110 racing fuel that they're crafting
out of ethanol and evil.
It's like, yeah, we said you could have gasoline.
That's rocket fuel.
That's what they're doing.
So not knowing what I'm talking about,
I wondered if having Iranians operate nuclear power plants
for the next 15, 20, 50 years.
Along the way, they'd learn enough to make nuclear missiles.
They would, yeah.
Like I would think so.
I mean, like have you seen-
They already have the missiles.
So the missile technology is just-
Well.
You buy.
Nuclear warheads, perhaps I should have said.
The miniature, yeah, the miniaturization of the material
and putting it in the warhead is the hardest part
after the enrichment, which they seem to have a handle on. But that needs to be blown up. I'm sure if Israel launch
strikes, then it needed to be done. I'm not even being facetious. I really am glad they
did it.
Yeah, they're not ones to make the rubble bounce. They only do the minimum in what's
absolutely necessary. So true. I too take a dim view to some of the heavy handed tactics being used in Palestine.
Or excuse me, Western Israel.
But...
No, it's just, have you seen the charts of like all the times Netanyahu has stoked the
flames about Iran's nuclear capabilities.
I've seen the charts.
Have you ever seen one of those?
It's like a high school science fair.
It's a ticking clock.
This is how long America has left to live.
And it's like three seconds.
It's like the Netanyahu chart I saw.
It was like 1992. Iran is within two years of having ICBMs that
are you have nuclear capacity for payload, and then 1994 and
then 1996. Then every, every couple years driving car
claims.
Yes, it's like this thing over and over. And now it's like
again, like, oh, Iran's gonna know what I would say to your
like, you know, why Iran wants the nukes so bad. It's because
Israel has nukes. That's why they want them so bad. You know
what, Israel has real deal nukes, they have the Jericho
missile that could like reach LA if they want to do like it's a
real deal nuclear missile. Look at this. Look at this cartoon
bullshit.
Checkmate. Very scientific right here with the
Wiley Coyote.
I was going to use the same
reference.
This is this looks like I got me
down for the Americans.
What they don't show in this photo
is every American
congressman standing and applauding.
They don't want to be the first one
to sit down. They have to stand
and keep applauding.
Yeah, this is like a fucking Tim and Eric sketch.
How ridiculous that is.
Taylor, the reason that these charts keep looking out of date
or like poorly aged milk is because of the actions of Israel
because when they go in there
and they blow up these nuclear facilities,
all of a sudden that cartoon cherry bomb
gets a little less full
of of of of iranian nuclear evil it lessens a little bit and also like iran is one of those
countries that's like big talk like we will not stand for this anymore and then it's like
really because it looks like you're going to keep standing for. Oh look, you did keep standing for it.
And so like, they're a big blustering nation.
Seemingly. Oh yeah?
So you don't think there's gonna be any
like counter-strike tonight then from the Iranians?
They won't shoot ballistic missiles at Israel?
I'll take that bet, it won't be tonight.
It's coming tonight or tomorrow night.
Well, I mean- I'm out now.
It's really about the three hour third of it.
I mean, we killed Soleimani.
They're mad about that.
They put a hit out on Trump for that.
They put a hit out on Trump.
They don't.
Iran is like a powerful country within the Middle East.
Very much so.
But they don't have the ability to project power outside of their
region. Is it hard?
They have ballistic.
How hard is it to shoot?
Like the president? Like, is it to shoot like the president?
Like is he that protected all the time? That teenager could knock it out. I'll tell you that.
Well, if he had a better scope, maybe he could. I just don't know how hard. I don't know whether
presidents rarely get assassinated because people aren't motivated or because it's really hard to
pull off. We're not going to find out tonight. I'm not going to shoot him. My plan is to vote against him.
You promised.
I guess.
That's such a funny question.
Do you promise?
For that to you, Taylor, do you promise not to raise
arms against Donald Trump?
Never in my life.
I'll go wherever Trump leads when that means that I have to carry a gun
and storm into Iran for no benefit to me and mine.
I will be gunned down.
No one is storming into a ram. No one is going there.
We're just going to blow up their toys when we decide that they're looking into
the blue cities.
Yeah. We just need to, uh, we just need to keep, you know,
keep doing exactly what we've been doing for decades in the middle east.
And it seems to me,
The Iranians are a bunch of no goodniks. All right. It's, it's,
I'm not going to whitewash their crimes. They're evils. They, you know,
they're propping up of all these terroristic regimes that the,
the Luthys and so on and so forth, you know, the, the bad folk of the world.
That's true. That's true.
They attacked that ship of ours in the Mediterranean in the 1950s.
That was the other guy.
USS Liberty?
When was that?
Am I wrong?
I think it was the 50s.
Was it 62?
I thought it was either early 60s or late 50s.
I'm going to go 67, but I'm still looking. Do an over and under? I thought it was either early 60s, late 50s.
I'm gonna go with 67, but I'm still looking.
Do an over and under on Dad's table.
How many think Dad?
36.
It is 67.
I think it's 32.
How many, Dad?
Oh, you're saying that 67 was the year.
I'm gonna say 32.
You say 36, Dads?
What do you got?
What do you got?
Yeah.
How many Americans were slaughtered?
I know the number.
Do I hear it? Yeah, we let me. Yes.
Thirty four.
Oh, look at that.
Right in the middle.
You went over.
Look at us.
The perfect app.
You average our answers.
We're on the fucking money.
All right.
Hell yeah.
Pretty good stuff.
You know, so we have, you know,
that was an accident.
Okay.
You know, look, look, I don't like it.
People start causing a big fuss every time one of our missiles go awry and blow up a fucking Jordanian wedding.
OK, I figure people just need to understand shit happens when you party
naked and occasionally we're going to fuck up.
All right, we're blowing up all sorts of shit.
You think that was the only wedding we blew up that day?
No, we blew up eight weddings that day.
That was the only one they complained. Oh, no.
I didn't know we blew up so many weddings that day. I don't think that's true. And shit happens when you party naked is hilarious. That was the only one that complained. Oh no. I didn't know we blew up so many weddings that day.
I don't think that's true. And shit happens when you party naked is hilarious. That is funny.
That's a good quote for Trump to bust out. A lot of smart people telling me,
shit happens when you party naked, not to be offensive.
In the movie Bad Santa, that snot-nosed little kid, that's what his shirt says.
But in the movie, Bad Santa, that snot nose little kid, that's what his shirt says.
Wait, what is that? Oh, dude, that bad Santa is so fucking funny. That kid isn't his name is
Thurman Merman. Your name is Thurman Merman. Jesus fucking Christ. He's my favorite part is when he's like, I beat the shit out of some kids today.
He's making up.
That bitch is like, what the fuck?
He's like, maybe feel good.
And he did.
He really beat the shit out of those kids.
Every time he opened, when he opens his car doors and then the bottles of liquor rain out
when he's ass fucking that fat chick in the dressing rooms and John Ritter's character is
like overhearing and he's like yeah yeah you ain't gonna shit right for a week
and John Ritter's character is disgusted he's relaying all this to Bernie Mac's character. He's like, I heard him in the ladies, big and tall, very passionate.
He said to the lady, you're not going to S H I T right for a week. And Bernie makes like,
week and Bernie makes like, oh,
ass fucking terrible, terrible.
Not strictly against policy, though, not a fireball offense.
These fucking peaches, spit the pizza, the pits out.
I love that movie. It's so dark and, and, and his soul is so black.
And it's, it's, it's a great dark comedy and anything Christmas related. You can, it's, it's great. it's a great dark comedy and anything christmas related
You can it's great. You can haul that out around the holidays for the family. I like it
I was like, what's the funny part? It just kept dragging on for me. I like the midget, you know, he's hilarious
God rest his little soul. He passed several years ago
Um, they age like age like dogs those poor little guys 17 years
Fucking terrible full of love, but but you only get it for so long on this earth. That's the way God wanted it, I guess.
I wish Bad Santa got the elf treatment.
And it was just one of those big Christmas movies.
It is for me.
It is for me.
It's opening monologue where he's like, I got half a liver and I'm an ex con
and my life's a black pile of shit,
but I can crack a safe, Steve, I can crack a safe, okay.
My dad taught me that.
Only thing he ever did, piece of shit.
This is a dark blackness flowing out of his soul.
And then he's having like parking lot sex
with the hot waitress and that weird Indian guy
like starts trying
to rape him or something. It's great. It's great. I love I love bad Santa and Billy Bob
Thornton in general anytime. I don't think I've seen too many things where I didn't like
Billy Bob Thornton and his brand of just dark humor and sort of I'm a piece of shit that
he exudes. He must be a piece of shit. Right. There's no way he could act that good. He
seems like an asshole. Yeah. And land man. He's that character, by the way. I recommend
land man to you. It's the only Taylor shared and written produced owned piece of shit that
I would recommend to anybody. Is he good? To me, it's good. You were right about the
propaganda. He does spew some some anti-epa propaganda at that one point
But I ate it up because he sold it to me so well. He put a fucking convincing. Yeah
You dumb shitty bitch. Don't you know how much co2 is produced by that concrete?
And how many years before we have to rip it all out?
Fuck Billy Bob's a man. He knows he's got a They're going all the way to like the tractor trailer that delivered the
crewman is if that's like this major thing, right?
He broke it down. Well, um, no, I recommend landmine, uh, man, he's,
he's a representative for an oil company like securing wells and such.
And he's just an awkward, mean son of a bitch. And his jailbait daughter,
who was played by a 22, 24 year old is just really nice to look at just just just
just just just just pussy lips popping everywhere just just camel toe all day er day it's it's a good
show anytime i start getting bored of like the show all of a sudden like pussy pants McGee shows
back up on screen and i'm right back on board again. I wonder if the next season will be the same.
Cause I, I, I, I hope we're tighter and deeper.
Who is the, um, who's the game of Thrones chick?
The mother dragons, the actress, Amelia Clark.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. I felt like she kind of pulled away from the nudity.
She did, but she became the star of the show and an a Lister.
This is some little show on AMC.
A little bitch is going to show that pussy all we want.
I just wonder if she's going to start having higher standards and back off on the
Lululemon show.
No, I'll get some Lululemons and pull them up.
Oh, boy.
You know why he named Lululemon?
I was about to ask if that was true because that's the kind of shit I would do.
It is true.
Okay.
I don't know the story.
It's because the, yeah,
the guy who made Lululemon thought it was funny how Asian people said, would have to say Lululemon.
And so he picked that as his product name. And so it'd be like RuruRamen. Like that made him laugh
because we're kindred spirits. If you don't know Woody, they're like super trendy
and very expensive.
Like spandex pants.
Leggings and all sorts of things.
Yoga pants, yeah.
They've been stuff now too, I think.
Maybe.
Just pop.
I bet they don't sell.
Oh, I mean.
Did you buy Lululemon stuff?
No, I don't buy very expensive clothes.
Usually.
We're kindred spirits.
We have the same like glittered shirts. The same exact Amazon fucking basics shirt.
Like no basics. It has an A and an M that kind of falls off after you wash it 50 times.
Let's see what this looks like. Because I'm imagining some real nut
huggers. Oh okay. Oh no it's like this is like nice shit. Really? Oh it's like
linen pants and like summer cack. Yeah okay. Oh yeah these are like normal clothes.
Yachtwear. It's like just it's like a just summer spring.
Like it's the kind of shit you would have worn with Sperry's when those were in vogue
20 years ago at this point, I guess.
I had Sperry's in like high school, I think.
And my God, the smell.
Oh yeah.
Rancid.
What are they?
What are they?
They're like dockers.
These like leather brown sailing shoes.
Yeah. Oh, okay.
They're like super comfortable sailing shoes.
Like they were great.
They were super soft, felt nice.
You didn't have to wear socks with them.
But then like my 14 year old feet would just smell absurdly.
I remember it was like the where socks with them.
It was like the Birkenstocks era.
I remember when everybody thought Birkenstocks were cool in middle school.
There would be kids who would have them and like I would just be sitting in class
and I would suddenly smell something offensive and I'd look over and it'd be like
fucking Ted popped his Birkenstocks off under the seat under his desk and it was like holy cow I gotta
stop wearing these. More than once my mom put my Sperrys on the front porch.
Yeah they smell awful. If I couldn't find them I knew where they were.
That scene in the office where they go to the wedding and Kevin left his shoes out in the hallway to be
polished but but the staff found that the smell was so offensive that had
become a health hazard so so they were incinerated I only have shoes that I
have and then at the wedding he walks out and he's got his feet in tissue boxes.
He's wearing like Kleenex boxes for shoes.
I empathize.
I get it.
He had some stinky feet.
You can't wear shoes without socks.
I learned that a long time ago.
I had a pair of loafers that I would just slip on
and like go to mailbox and I was like,
these smell like death.
These smell like death. You smell like,
there's 25 year olds watching who listened to you talk about the office the way
you listen to people talk about friends.
Those people have bad taste. Like, like, like,
this is the time, right? Like, you know,
the office is pretty much before their time. They were kids when they were.
No, no. First of all, both of those shows have seen a zoomer interest and research,
a huge resurgence of their popularity because zoomers are both are into both of those shows big time.
But the office more than any other. The office is incredibly popular. Its popularity has to
entirely surpass that of friends, even though that one drug addict that was on there got stewed to death like fucking roast beef. All right, P. Yeah.
Friends. I never, I like I want I had I used Friends as like a background show
while I was working out probably 2018 or so. And by the time I was a little bit in, I almost
finished the most of the series like indignantly where I was like wow my my
thought about this show based on what people had told me mostly girls should
have known then that like oh this is like a Seinfeld but just like you know
kind of different and how funny it is but it's just as funny as Seinfeld not
even close the best episode of Friends couldn't touch the absolute worst episode of Seinfeld.
Not even close. They're not even genuine trash. None of it was fun.
None of it was funny. None of it was funny.
The dude had a monkey for like two episodes and they decided, hey, guys,
we're having too much fun here with the monkey.
So we're going to pull him out.
And then we're the only good part was Jennifer Aniston's hard nips.
That was the only thing I liked.
I think you're overlooking Monica.
Monica's nips were great also.
But it'd be like, oh, now we get a cut scene with fucking Joey.
It is like masturbation captain seat where they both sit there. And I always hated it.
I never laughed at it. It's one of those shows where you pull the laugh track and
it's and it's exposed as a fraud of a show. It's like this is bullshit. This is a man you like in today's world where we have
so many options it wouldn't even be a top 20 fucking show. Oh yeah. You know the guy alive in
the ratings like the first season or two because there's nothing there. There's nothing there but
pretty whores. Pretty whores with ridiculous amounts of
money based on their careers.
Like I don't know how a paleontologist has all that money,
but the waitress has as much money as they're all incredibly rich inexplicably.
And they're dirty whores. They're all dirty whores.
They're all disgusting whores.
You know the explanation for why they're so wealthy.
It's because if you're going to shoot something,
you can't do it in a small apartment. That's why why they're so wealthy. It's because if you're gonna shoot something,
you can't do it in a small apartment.
That's why their place was so large.
They needed room for cameras and such.
And so I'm not trying to say it was a good show,
but that show in its prime did for me
what I sometimes like music to do.
It's just a little uplifting, right?
It's not serious.
It's not a great work of art.
I don't think it's going to live on in time memoriam.
But when that theme song came on about the friends and then
they had their little jokes and the laugh track hit what
Fresh Prince of Bel Air is.
Maybe I smiled more than I would have if some other show
was on.
Have you ever seen the episode of Fresh Prince of Bel Air
where Will's dad shows up and he's like all
lovey-dovey with Will, but then he abandons him again at the end,
even though they had the trip planned and they had this big scene with uncle
Phil yelling at the dad and then,
and then Will shows up and they and him and Phil hug it out and he's crying.
Like, like that's a good show. Yes. That's a good fucking show.
Prince of Bel-Air the whole way through was a great show. There's another scene
I really liked where Carlson
Carls is called Carlton. Thank you. It was called a sellout and he kind of you know
It talks about like his own value system. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Yeah, you be you I like it. Yeah Carlton ruled
I always liked Carlton's own dance
I always liked Carlton. He had his own dance.
It was fun.
It's in Fortnite, I think.
And I liked the butler.
He was great.
Giles?
Mm-hmm.
Giles.
I think Giles was his name.
I think you're right.
Yeah.
Aunt Viv, who got replaced, the actress did.
Yeah, they could have replaced her 15 times and I wouldn't give a shit.
It's all about Uncle Phil.
Didn't matter.
Yeah, it was about Uncle Phil.
Maybe if she was better, we wouldn't feel that way about her.
Because I agree with what you said, right?
Did Uncle Phil originally have such a banger part or did he just hit it out of the park
again and again until they wrote more for him?
He's great.
That's probably right.
Yeah.
Yeah, they...
It is interesting when shows take that route where it's like clearly someone was intended
to be like on the outskirts.
And then it's like, no, this guy just kills it. We got to write a Phil centric episode.
Everybody likes Phil.
Parks and Rec, the name of the guardian of the galaxy, Hector.
Chris Pratt.
Chris Pratt. Yeah, yeah. So Chris Pratt originally had a very small role. He was only supposed
to be in that for a couple episodes. Kept hitting it out of the park. And eventually he became one of the main cast.
Yeah.
Well, you're forgetting the main thing.
I'm having to look the guy's name up.
Steve Brandon.
That's what it was.
Brandon, which in season one.
All right.
So, I think I sucked and he wasn't funny.
That's the problem.
So Parks and Rec is like written and produced by the same team as the office.
They wanted a carbon copy of the office.
And so that's what Park Park and Rec was supposed to be.
Obviously you see some carry over.
The guy who plays Moe's, cousin Moe's in the office,
he's the writer, director, creative,
line Parks and Rec.
He comes over to Amy Poehler and does a new thing.
They bring, the one actress came over,
I can't think of her name.
She's the main actress in Parks and Rec.
But they had this Steve Brandovitch character or something and he's the gem of
Parks and Rec in season one. He's the quasi love interest for the Leslie Knope character. He's flirty. He's handsome
He's like available, but he's a little bit of a man whore and it came off bad
He came off as sleazy and disinterested and Leslie kind of comes off as a mean character in season one
They had to fine-tune that as well
But they just straight up like kicked him off the show and replaced him with Andy
In season two and then going on Andy became a main player because like you said
He was a couch surfing shitty boyfriend and he was yeah do that and then that was gonna be it to their credit
I appreciate the pivots, you know that they kind of reevaluated their talent after their little filming and said ah
This guy wins this guy loses and I think they made the right call office office mutates over time
Obviously you had Michael Scott being a scumbag in season one. It also his hair is wild and then Kevin in season one
Kevin's like a normal guy. Almost, right?
He's got like, he's a musician and he's a gambler and he's into the Eagles and he's
an accountant.
And by the end it's like, I am retarded.
Yeah, he's like an actual retard by the end, which was funny.
That scene where he, I know we're just talking about fucking TV show moments now, but like
seeing for the, when it aired, because the office was a show that my family and I would watch as it was coming out most weeks when I was young. And that scene where he like comes in with the chili
and just has the most aggressive spill of any food I've ever seen.
Like I was dying in my living room with my family,
laughing at how fucking funny him trying to scoop it up
with like a clipboard.
That was so fucking funny.
Like physical comedy,
like you can really appreciate it in the moment
because it's like this guy had one shot at it.
It's like the Kramer stuff.
Like some of the stuff Kramer pulls off is like that's so like the I'm sure you know
This example marks on the door and stuff where like crank he had they've done that thing like so many times that he's kicked that door
50 a hundred fucking times and it's just covered with black rubber. Yeah, it's so good
Kramer I think is the the goat of the physical humor as far as like modern era
stuff. Like there's all of it is so fucking good, so funny. But even you watch season one of
Seinfeld, Kramer is not a complete lunatic yet. He's played down. Like he's more muted. He like
is that he's polite to Jerry. So you're talking about you're talking about when a character originally is one thing and he sort of takes the show over.
Family Matters with Steve Urkel and family met. So I love those black sitcoms. I watched more of
those. They're good. And Family Matters for those who don't know is a black sitcom from the early
nineties that had the nerdy neighbor character named Steve Urkel. The main cast was a was a black sitcom from the early 90s that had the nerdy neighbor character named Steve Urkel. The main cast was a black cop and his big black family and the kids go to school
and they got the grandma living there and there's the romance and the support in the
family because money's tight. And then Steve Urkel is this nerd who's into Laura who's
the cop's daughter. By the end of that show, it was the Urkel hour. Urkel had, Urkel would do time travel.
Urkel had, Urkel would make a machine
that would turn him into an alter ego.
His name was Stephen Urkel,
but his alter ego's name was Stefan.
Yeah, I didn't like Stefan.
Stefan would slide in like, hey, Laura, how's it?
And she's, and Laura's super into Stefan,
which I thought was super bullshit.
So you know it's Steve and Urkel.
Like you know, like this thing.
And, but he took over that show.
He became the star of that show.
Oh, it wasn't even a disguise.
It was, she was just like, Urkel had to deal with the fact
that Laura just was only into him
when he went through his wacky sci-fi machine
that he had in the early seasons.
It's a hundred percent ground in reality.
It's a cop and his family living in Chicago.
By the end, it's sci-fi.
Like we've got Doctor Who living next door.
I hated the Stefan bits in Family Matters.
Did not like Stefan at all.
I agree.
I was a kid, so I liked all that shit.
It was like, yeah, turn him cool. I was a kid. I was a younger kid. I didn't like it. Yeah. That's fair.
That checks out. Yeah. Yeah. Well, poor Will Smith. What a fall. I think we've had a fun
time. You guys ready to call it? I am. PKA 756.