Painkiller Already - PKN #101

Episode Date: July 29, 2016

It's PKN time baby!

Okay. PKN101, I was like, hey, if we have a first topic, and Taylor's like, yeah, that's all I needed to hear, that he had a topic he wanted to talk about. And it's Pokemon Go. Yes. So are you glad that you got behind that before you knew what I was campaigning for?

You know, I've played it now. You have? I have. Okay, so first impressions. Let's get some. It's a very... Aside from all the glitching and laggingging out because everybody's having that problem. All right.

So just to lay this out there, we didn't play it very long. We played it for maybe – I'm going to call it 45 minutes to an hour. Kyle and I went in the golf cart and we drove around. Like my house seemed to have nothing. Like there was nothing in my house, nothing in my field. I knew there wouldn't be a lot, but I thought there'd be lame pigeons here and there. Is it pigeons? No, but it doesn't matter. Anybody who knows, knows what you mean. Anybody who doesn't know,

doesn't know. I thought there'd be a bunch of lame pigeons or something in the yard. No, no, there was nothing. We went over like our house is surrounded by medium density housing. This is like regular suburbs, subdivisions. So we take the golf cart into there and start going after all their Pokemon. Pokemon, I'm sorry, I'm learning the vernacular. And we found them, they were there. It seemed like every couple of minutes

we were catching another one. And Colin was doing it. And I'm being like the best dad I can possibly be, even though he's kind of sucking at these Pokeballs. And we haven't run out of any Pokeballs. But I know from our conversations that they're a limited resource. So I'm watching them, flicking them left, flicking them right, seemingly having no concept of the idea that you have to control how far they go.

I'm just like, all right, all right. You want some help with that kid? Dad's a gamer. So we did that for a while. I guess that's really all there was to it. My phone's not in my pocket. I'd show you my lineup. But yeah, we called a bunch of things.

We even evolved one of them. And, you know, just in the end, I'm like, I don't know why people do this. And I feel like such a dick for saying that because all games are silly, right? And it doesn't matter whether you're talking about chess or fallout or pokemon right you just don't really get anything for it it's for fun and but you don't you're not seeing the fun in this yeah so that's so let me help a little so what you played was like like one like 20 of the actual game so the game is about catching these Pokemon and some of the Pokemon you catch, many of the Pokemon you catch, are nothing

more when you boil it down than fuel. Fuel for your big Pokemon. You want 1, 2, 3, 4 big Pokemon that are special and powerful that you're going to use later to take over gyms. So like, there's a couple of gyms around here with my name on them and my character standing on top with my

badass Pokemon in front. I went out and took two churches today. It was great. And I go in and I have to beat all of the enemy Pokemon that are in there with my guy. And it's challenging because you're dodging, you're using quick moves, and you're using power moves. And I've got a combat situation, my Pokemon versus theirs. I have questions about that so it sounds like you're actively playing your pokemon when you take the other one but that other guy is on like remote control or something like like yes that pokemon you're

fighting at the gym so like i took over the gym today and i left my snorlax at the top of it now if someone comes by and goes oh i want to take that guy's gym there's a Snorlax at the top of it. Now, if someone comes by and goes, oh, I want to take that guy's gym, there's a Snorlax defending it, and he beats my Snorlax, I had no control over its moves. Like, it's just an AI Snorlax. Because if you did have control over it,

it would be really, really unfair. Because you could stack, like, eight people at the same gym, and if they all get a little notification of, hey, some guy's trying to take you down, suddenly's like oh okay now you have honestly zero percent chance because i can just i can dodge as well yeah so you kind of have to have it on ai it's hard enough to beat you know one pokemon in a 1v1 but then if you're beat you've got to beat many of them uh to take the gym over and um yeah it's so if like say you have to beat four okay after you've beaten the

first one does the damage from that fight carry over to the next one or do you yes okay yeah so you gotta really come in there and wreck house it's not like street fighter where every time you're both at full health again yeah well it depends there's a couple different oh sorry go ahead well you can you can you i'm red team so i can go to a red gym and i'm just sort of beating up their pokemon trying to become the the top dog there but i'm also um you know and in that scenario i'm not getting to change pokemon out but if i go to like a blue gym then i can right i can i can use like a like my whole lineup i got like a lineup of guys and so what will happen is I'll take out their first water Pokemon

with my electric Pokemon. And then the next one will be like, I don't know, an animal Pokemon. So I'll switch out and use my psychic Pokemon against him. And so in that regard, when you're going red against blue and actually taking a gym away from the other team for your team, then you are kind of using your whole lineup if you'd like. I see. I was getting a lot better at the actual fighting of like,

apparently you wait. I'm reading on the Pokemon Go Reddit. When you see the yellow flash, you swipe. You swipe twice, I guess, when you see the yellow flash in the beginning to dodge, dodge, because they'll start with two attacks, the AI one. And I was getting good at it with my little, like, weak electric Jolteon, which

is an electric type, which means in this game, its defense is fucking horrific. And so if I just don't dodge and just try and trade blows, I'm gonna get butt-fucked. And so I was getting a little good at that. And then I started using Snorlax. And Snorlax is a Pokemon that is... It's one of the

biggest in the game, and its modus operandi is to take as much fucking damage as you can throw at it and ask for more. Like, thank you, sir, may I have another? Like, Snorlax doesn't give a fuck. And so now all I do to win is just tap the same spot on the screen because I haven't encountered anyone yet that can beat it. But to get back to the thing at hand, what makes the game fun? The majority of the Pokemon that I'm actually going out and capturing,

I'm just giving them to the professor who, I suppose, grinds them into something, which he then compacts into candy, and then he gives me back a candy for every one he grinds up, and you use those candies, obviously, to evolve Pokemon. So I'm trying to get evolved versions of the good and effective ones, like the Vaporeon or a Snorlax would be great. I don't have anything like that. So evolving my pigeon was a dumb idea.

No, you got XP. See, this is another mechanic of the game, is getting as much XP as you can in the most efficient way possible. There's varying mechanics. Yeah, I don't mean to brag, we're already level 4. Like I think we're... That's good.

It becomes a steeper incline as you go. It's rough up around level 20. But the thing is, so like when you evolve a Pidgey, you get like 500 XP. So what people will do, what I do, is I catch lots and lots of Pidgeys, and then I cash them all in for candy, except for, you know, if I've got, if it takes 10 candies to evolve a Pidgey, then I only need 5 Pidgeys to evolve, because I'm with 50 candies. So I get the right ratio so that it's correct. Then I throw down a double XP egg and just sit there and evolve them all as quickly as I can,

and I'm getting like 1,000 XP for every one. So doing things like that and grinding on your character is part of the game. But for me, I'm driving around a lot and going to all these different locations, and that's fun for me, like driving to all the Pokestops because there's lots of kids out there playing and they i don't play like this i never get out of my car and look around like it's an easter egg hunt but i see the kids who are doing it and that shit looks fun it looks like a

real that's what makes the game good i guess because there's a real life easter egg component to it that i'm really not into see then that's the thing too like i see people wanting to like get close and like easter egg hunt and such but that's a thing, too. I see people wanting to get close and Easter egg hunt and such, but that's not really our experience. We just drove around in the golf cart and then stopped driving whenever it popped up in front of us. That's because there's a broken component of the game right now. So there's a geolocation that applies to the Pokemon, and it uses footsteps to indicate how their distance. So if something is three steps away from you, you can consider that kind of a long distance, but

it's in your area, and so on and so forth, down to one when it's very close. Maybe one step away. But that's broken. So all you ever see is three footsteps. So what'll happen, and maybe this has contributed to the success of the game, what will

happen is you'll have a park full of kids, and they start communicating because as a group, they're a big geolocator. So the guy on this end of the crowd can see Snorlax. The guy on that end can't. We know it's north. You know what I mean? So then the crowd starts working together, and everyone could have the ability to possibly catch the Snorlax.

It's not like there's literally one. There's one for everyone. The whole group starts working together in real life like it's multiplayer. I think that's contributing to some of the pros. I think it would be so awesome to get some vlog footage of Kyle and I picture 52 eight-year-olds.

You do, but you shouldn't. It's so bizarre. I got up early a couple mornings ago, went out and got breakfast. Went to Chick-fil-A. It was delicious. And I sat there by a Pokestop with a lure out catching Pokemon while I ate my breakfast. And there were four cars that came and parked next to me, and one of them was a cop. One of them was a cop.

I thought the cop was seeing what kind of weird back alley gang we had because it's really kind of tucked out of the way. I was like, hey. I waved at the cop and he's like, I was like, I'm playing a game. He goes, me too. I was like, that's my lure. I bet they've got some crazy strong lineups

if you're a cop who plays this right now. Because you're like, suddenly, Johnson, we noticed you're patrolling the same four spots for hours on end. Well, it's where a lot of the activity is going on. That's my side of town. Keep my eye on it. Yeah, but it says you're leaving your car

every 15 minutes to recharge your phone. What's going on in there? The thing I want to bitch about with it a little bit, it doesn't have to do with the game as much as me just being a little pissy at how much better luck Chiz is having than me and Kyle. Because I swear to God, every 15 minutes, we get a message from Chiz saying like, oh, caught a new super rare whatever or whoa, an egg hatched into this Arcanine. And I'm sitting there like, how many Pokemon have you caught? And I asked him this today

because it gives you a full running total of how many you've caught total. I've caught hundreds more than him. Hundreds! Not like 100. He's caught like 700 total. I've caught a thousand. And he's got, he's seen 30% more shit. So I'm just not seeing anything because I guess Missouri doesn't have a great ecosystem.

I suspect that Chiz might be cheating in some way. Because Chiz's lineup is so fantastic. And I guess I'm just forgetting that there's big parts of the day when I can't play. But when I go to town, there are some days when I'm running errands, and I can play this game the entire time I'm running errands. So if I go out and stop at six stores and pick up a bunch of stuff, and it's five hours of driving around, I'm playing Pokemon Go for five hours at a time hitting Pokestops,

and yet somehow he's still destroying me. Destroying me. Yeah, the egg thing really illuminated the possibility of perhaps a bit of cheating for me. That's the other thing. So the egg thing, you have to go to Pokestops, hope when you swipe it that you get an egg, then you can put the egg in the incubator,

and it'll hatch, and it's random, but hopefully you get something good. The hatching, you need to walk it to incubate it? You have to walk it, correct. Which is another thing he's not big on. You have to walk it for five around at eight miles an hour. But the thing about it is, so I messaged Chiz and we were talking today.

I'm like, how many Pokemon have you caught? I've caught a thousand. Oh, I've caught 700. Well, fuck, that doesn't make sense. Well, how many PokeStops have you visited? I don't remember what his number was, but I visited 140. Kyle's visited 119 or something like that. You don't know his number? I desperately want to know it. Like ballpark it. I don't know what his number was, but I visited 140. Kyle's visited 119 or something like that.

You don't know his number? I desperately want to know it. I don't know what it is, but I said, what's your egg total? He said, I've had 149 or 142 eggs hatch. And I'm like, okay, that's more than, that's like four times as many as me. Like, how are you possibly getting this many more eggs than me when for the first few days we were playing you were just saying you were playing from home whereas this entire fucking time i've like every errand i go on now is a is so long that when i say

like oh i'm running to get kidoba for dinner because i just trump up new ideas to leave are you gonna really go get kidobadoba or are you gonna go play Pokemon Go? I'm like, well, I'm gonna drive across the street and I'm gonna hit all of those Pokestops and then I'm gonna drive a few miles to Qdoba and then I'm gonna come back, hit the same Pokestops and then there's some more the other way and so I'll be back in an hour fifteen, you know,

for what should be a twenty minute trip. And so I've been doing that a lot and so I'm just thinking like there's no fucking way unless he's just getting all eggs that he has that many more than me. I've got to be honest. Can you buy him with money? No. Like, I'm already impressed with how Taylor, like, outpaces me.

I would say he's outpaced me by, like, 10% every day. Like, he matches what I do, and then he still, like, extends his lead ahead of me. But Chiz just destroyed us somehow. I mean, I'm going out every day. Every one of my... There's no homebody days anymore. This app, it really is.

It's like, we need milk. See you in two hours. I get back and I'm just like, glug, glug, glug, glug, glug, glug, glug, glug. We need more milk. Well, this one was for the gallon challenge the other one was for breakfast i forgot to get a second we need more milk yeah the thing with chiz is like i don't think he's cheating but i don't know because he's also very tech savvy and he could figure something out like that if he wanted to but oh oh the the

smoking gun i'm a higher level than jizz so level are you higher than four i'm halfway to 23 so i'm level 22 okay jizz is a level behind me and he still has found so many fucking more pokemon than me it's like three days ago we texted and we like, hey, what's your Pokédex? And I was like, oh, I've caught 60 or whatever it was. And Chiz is like, oh, I've only caught 40. Kyle's like, oh, I've caught 58. And fast forward three days, I'm at 73 captured and caught unique.

Kyle's right around there. 60. And Chiz is at like 97. So just out of nowhere, just straight up through the ranks. And I don't know. It's all the fucking eggs. And I don't know how he's getting those eggs. Now, I know he said that he's been going out a lot.

So all I can imagine is that he's somehow getting... I don't know how he's getting all those eggs. Because he's getting the eggs and he's hatching them. And there's no way to like you know how I was really the I'm sorry Taylor would you say oh no I've got a choo-choo train I've been running mine on and that doesn't even work that well like you bought the train of course I bought the train I thought that was a joke thanks great yeah I literally have a model train to exercise your phone.

Yeah, I was going to put it on this show, but I felt like I should save it for PKA. So I'll have it in the background making its rounds with my phone attached to the top. That's so fucking funny. It makes smoke. It's got little lights on. It'd be good.

Does it help with the game much? No. Is there a way that you can make the track so it's very long? Yeah, I need more track. I'm going to get more track. It's very cheap, the track is. So I'm going to get more track and make like a 50-foot circle. And honestly, I'll keep tinkering until I've got something that's just outside

with a central spinning point and a long string so that the circumference of the circle that it's making just by spinning a little thing is like 100, 200 feet or something and just let him crank out a few K a day because I got nine eggs in here and they're just getting nowhere. Nowhere.

It's taking fucking forever. As you rank up, is it more difficult to incubate eggs? No, but there are better classes of eggs. There are eggs that hatch at varying distances. And I would equate it to those CSGO crates, right? I think some of them are higher percentages than others. But you could still get a million-dollar prize out of the lowliest of egg, I think.

But there are 2-kilometer eggs, 5, 5km eggs, and 10km eggs. And a 10km egg, as you might imagine, is much more likely to give you something really, really nice. So it just seemed like overnight, Chiz hatched, like, 110k eggs. Yeah, I've had two... No, I've had three 10k eggs

the entire time I've been playing. Every single one of them has been an Eevee, which is the most common thing you can get from there. Every single one. And yet Chiz is texting, Oh, I got an Arcanine. Oh, I got a Kabutops. Oh, I got a Machamp.

All these really rare things that I'm not even seeing on the gyms. All the Geo guys or Geo dudes or whatever. Yeah, he's got golem now. So do you need to collect like multiple of these things to evolve them, right? Well, the eggs give you lots of the candy in one shot. So you might hatch an egg and get like an Eevee and he'll come with 25 Eevee candy. So you're like really close to getting your Vaporeon already and that will contribute to other Eevees you've already captured. So it's a boost in that way.

But still, you don't get one that's ready to be evolved again normally. He's not immediately useful either. If you get something you've never had before, you need more of those to start winning gyms, right? Almost all the time. That's true. Unless you happen to catch

one that's really rare and already really strong. There are diamonds out there running around see that's what keeps me into the game really is because there's a percentage calculated in the code of this game I'd love to see it how often does a Mewtwo

CP900 just show up and when and where but it's gotta be like a one in a million shot because I don't see them ever yeah you know I see lots of ratatas and lots of pidgeys and now that as I'm ranking up different Pokemon are becoming more common though so that's definitely a component of the game so now I'm seeing a lot of pollywags I'm seeing like lots of the Ekans the snake guys the the gold eanes the like the one that looks like a really pretty koi fish.

I'm seeing more and more of those. I've seen three pincers since I've had the game, though. Or Scythers. See, it has to be somewhat regional. I'm going to Texas. Hey, there you go. Yeah, I'm going to Texas at the end of the month. I'm really excited about the prospect of hunting some Texan Pokemon. It's going to Texas. Hey, there you go. New shit. Yeah, I'm going to Texas at the end of the month. I'm really excited about the prospect of hunting some Texan Pokemon.

It's going to be great. I've got the only, like, super rare thing I've got is the Snorlax. And I don't even think that's super rare. But, I mean, it's pretty fucking rare. Very few people have them. But I've caught three of those. So I've got three of the same really rare thing, which, of course, I slaughtered one of them

to feed the stronger, and that one who's in second place right now isn't too happy about his chances, but maybe he makes it. We'll see. He's really hoping for a little... He's really hoping for a little brother. He's really hoping. He's out there helping me, doing the Snorlax call.

Come over here! You can trust me! This guy's great! Not that guy! you're too big yeah that oh i just don't get it there's chiz has got to be either cheating or hanging out at a poke stop oh i'm fucking yeah let me throw that in there i i think here's here's what he could be doing if he's sitting somewhere and i think he may have said that this is the case i think he's he's going on little pokemon adventures and he's found a good place to sit and like drink coffee or something and i think he's sitting between multiple pokey stops and just spinning them all and you know from one seat and it's just you know if you were to sit there for eight hours i suppose

that this could happen but i don't know how he's hatching the eggs. I don't understand either. And I don't care if he cheats to hatch the eggs, because I'm all for cheating to hatch the eggs, because that's one part of the game that's just too greedy. It depends how you cheat to hatch the eggs. I made the argument last night that because it's

a children's game, that Kyle's use of the train is totally fine. It's par for the course. That's what a child would do. If you're on the computer hacking into a phone and making it think that it's connected to a 747, a child would not do that.

That's not acceptable. I wouldn't do that either. You have to tie it to animals. You have to put it on a train. You can put it on a string and swing it from a bridge or whatever you want to do, but it has to be a children's solution. I thought of tying it to animals.

It's my favorite one. Yeah, me too. I love that. If you lived around here, we've got three dogs that'll really cover some kilometers. Like, yeah. It's going too quick, though. You need a shitty little maybe 12-year-old dog. Three legs. They wrestle with each other and stuff.

They're not always running in a straight line. They're just messing around out there. That worked out nicely. Yeah, I'm going to find some way to hatch my eggs more quickly because that's one component. Because I'm full of eggs, and it's like, well, I guess I've got to go walk around and not play the game actively anymore

because I have no room in my inventory to go out and hunt more eggs. Well, I can keep them, but I want to hatch them now. That's going to be the little thing that I want to buy more as the game goes on, are those incubators. Because I'm not going to have the fucking patience to go one by one on those things. They're not that expensive. They're like

30 cents each use when you boil it down. But you can hatch a bunch of eggs at once, right? If you need multiple incubators. Yeah. The game comes with one that's free, that has unlimited uses, and then from then on, you have to buy them.

So, if you've got 10 eggs you're working on, you need to buy 9 more incubators and start walking. Unless you want to leave a bunch of eggs not being incubated and you just walk, say, five kilometers for the one that's currently in the incubator. Then that hatches. Then you can pick another one and put it in there.

But if you want to get credit for all of them, you've got to load them all up. I guess there's not much value in it. I just feel like if you're a dog walker or something, you should totally just have a backpack full of phones. Yeah.

That's a service already. Chiz linked it the other day. They were charging, you know, for different kilometer distances to walk your Pokemon. And it was like $5, $10 or something like that. And I just imagine a guy, like you said, backpack full of cell phones doing his regular 10K run, you know, and just being like cha-ching cha-ching and there's another component of the game and we'll probably wrap up pokemon talk after this but where like currently i'm the master of a couple of poke gyms so i'm earning um the same credits that are exchangeable for money and items in gamegame from my time of being the leader of that PokeGym, as well

as some in-game magic fairy dust bullshit. So, there is that, too. So that's the part I'm into now, is I want to literally take over every gym in my area, which is like six or eight gyms, so it's definitely possible. You're holding them for a long time,

too. Yeah, for days, which I think is unusual in a populated area. Plus, I've got a 1700 CP Vaporeon in there, so he's pretty tough. Yeah, those things are so OP. I have a different topic. I'm pretty happy with it. Yeah, go for it. I changed the oil in our cars today, and I think Jackie's car might be dying.

There were metal shards that came out of the oil pan and I'm not 100% sure where the shards came from like first of all I changed the oil in two cars at once and then as I dumped a little basin into the bigger basin that's when I found the metal so it could have been from either one but we suspect it's from Jackie's car and the I'm not talking about shavings like some of the chunks were like a centimeter long and you drop them and they go ting when they hit the metal. It looks like the gears on something or the bearings get stripped out.

I don't know what it is. I think that you should trade that car in ASAP and get her a nice new car. That might be the move. Like dress it up, whatever you got to do to make it not have any symptoms. It doesn't really. It ticks a tiny bit, but you have to listen for it. And it doesn't tick when it's in park.

I don't know what the scoop is. I don't know. Maybe scoop is yeah i don't know maybe put a tip make 10 more uh weight than normal oil in there see if it quiets it down for the day you know just put like an analog clock in the passenger seat so then i keep a lot of them on me he'll never know i'll just put the tourettes in full that's me or just every time it starts to tick you just oh what's that oh no my tourettes it changes every time no sorry it's it's oh it's crazy that's when you accelerate it so so um uh but yeah and again like i so it could be a bunch of things.

Last time I changed the oil, I literally did every mower and every car and the golf cart at the same time. So I'm like, was it left over from that? I really don't think so, but possibly. This time I did both cars, so it could have been either car. But the fact that Jackie's car has a slight tick to it, it implies something. It's really mild though and I think that engine that's in your truck is super reliable yeah it has a reputation as being that it seems more likely well not Toyota's yes but also

the particular engine that he has is it's just it's a very durable thing and so it's more likely that it's Jackie's v8 or V6. She has a V8. She often reminds me that her car can beat up my truck, which is bullshit. I love that you're like and I thought about it and no, it couldn't. That's not even true.

You misinterpreted. I'd back away slowly while her car overheated and stalled, and then I crush her from the driver's side. It's not that it's bullshit that her car could do it. It's bullshit that her car could do it. The state of affairs that we're in is bullshit.

Her car is faster. It could pull more. It has a higher tow rating than my truck. Bitch. You need to say, no, my car can beat my truck. You don't have a car. Would you like a flying machine in lieu of a new one? She's running to the store to take coffee.

Hey, the cake would come in handy. Full throttle! The weight of that gallon of milk makes it hard to take off on the way home. Splatters it on landing. And that's not cape weather. It gets sucked in. So, yeah, I don't know.

For me, it's a big thing. All of a sudden, we could potentially just rock the car for a while and see if it really does have issues or we could maybe do a trade-in or that's where you are on that yeah because you were already thinking about getting the new car for jackie so it's like ah this is a sign from god if there is one you know whoever sends signs through automobile failure as they do say maybe a sign from Satan I don't know someone is sending you a sign that yes it is time to pull the trigger on that woody this one's

getting sickly and as of right now it's just a little tick but next week I don't know fucking timing belt goes flying or something who knows what could happen you know you could trade that bad boy and get full value maybe several thousand dollars more than it's technically worth and you know you could trade that bad boy in get full value maybe several thousand dollars more than it's technically worth and uh you know get her in something new and uh fashionable how old is the car that she has now it's an 04 so all right i guess that's actually 12 years old huh yeah it's time yeah trade to get a new metal shavings. It's not metal shavings.

You know, I could go get it. Do you want to see it? No, I could picture small bits of metal. I got it. It's just when you say shavings, it implies like sprinkles of metal. No, these are like chunks. Little chunks. Little chunks.

Oh, that's, yeah, that's pretty serious. In any case, I mean, you were already thinking about it. So like, what would you get? Do you have any ideas? Or does she have any ideas? Yeah, that's pretty serious. In any case, I mean, you were already thinking about it. So, like, what would you get? Do you have any ideas? Or does she have any ideas? I think she really wants another 4Runner. And all I want for her is to open her mind to other cars. Like, I just feel like whatever car we buy.

Can I make a suggestion? Yeah, but let me finish the thought. I feel like whatever car we buy should win the car buying competition, right? car we buy should win the car buying competition right like we should be looking at the explorer the forerunner the tahoe and whatever else is is there and whatever rises to the top should win it shouldn't be a one-man race to start with because then you don't know the best one one could go i gotta say i'm a huge fan of the ford explorer i've rented it on my last three trips and i'm and i'm gonna rent it again on this next trip. I've driven that thing in the

mountains of Colorado with snow and ice. I've driven it in the deserts of Texas with sand and fucking jumping over railroad tracks and stuff in it. Driven off-road in Texas, all over that wildlife place, up really steep, gravelly

hills where the four-wheel drive had to be really thinking to keep all four wheels uh from from slipping it was loose gravel and i don't know what the incline was but it was a you wouldn't want to walk it it like walking it would have been precarious right it was it was extreme and that thing went right up it like it was nothing and i was terrified at the base and by the time we got to the top i was so proud and that thing went right up it like it was nothing. And I was terrified at the base, and by the time we got to the top, I was so proud of that car. So I would go explore. And there's lots of creature comforts that are just really nice, from the backup stuff to the AC seats, the heated seats, heated steering wheel. That's really nice.

I mean, we're in Colorado. Every time we got into the car, we had to knock the ice off the door handle, so a heated steering wheel is just wonderful. And they have heated and cooled cup holders you can get it with, which is just... It's silly until you have it. And then it's like,

oh, I didn't realize how much I really have an opinion on the temperature my drink should be. Like, it can't get any cooler, it can't get any hotter but those are really really nice the ford explorers like we when we were in sacramento what's the one bigger than an explorer that they still sell expedition expedition yeah is that the biggest one those are really big yeah those are the biggest the excursion is the one they discontinued and yes oh okay then then i must have had an Expedition, but I'm not certain.

I thought it was bigger than the Explorer on that trip in Sacramento. And, oh my god, it was fast. It only had a six-cylinder. I opened up the hood. I was like, what the fuck is this magic thing under the hood? The thing went like 95 quietly, and it just slithered around. It was a six-cylinder? cylinder yeah i don't think that's a thing well then maybe it was the explorer then it was definitely ford it had air condition is

is the same thing as like the yukon xl like that's big it's a big truck it's it's three rows instead of two it's like a suburban same size asban. I should go back and check the tapes, actually. We vlogged that whole trip. I didn't used to like the Explorers. When I was selling them, I didn't like them. I liked the Chevrolet better at that time. But right now, I haven't driven the Chevrolet.

The newer ones, so maybe if I got into one of those, I'd be blown away by that. But I've got a lot of experience with the Explorer and no bad thoughts about it. What other ones are you thinking about? Because I haven't driven any, but I've heard that stuff like the Honda Pilot is really nice. I think that's a size smaller. Or maybe not technically a size smaller, but practically a size smaller.

Oh. Yeah. The Pilots I see on the street don't appeal to my aesthetic. Boxy. You know one that's, like, unique pilots I see on the street don't appeal to my aesthetic. Um, boxy, you know, one that's like unique and apparently is super nice. I've never driven one, but I've been in one before the Ford flexes. I think they're a little goofy looking and they have like that kind of shiny roof on a lot of them.

And they look a little bit hotter, but they're super nice. They're, um, I think they're like one of the crossover SUVs, the Ford Flex. And Jackie has surprisingly strong opinions about being taller than other cars. She wants to be able to crush them like a bug. That's part of her buying criteria. And she has just loved that 4Runner the whole time. How about a Yukon? That would be on the list.

You'd think we should be looking at the Yukon. Those are nice too. That's the GMC version of the Tahoe, right? Yep. So it's nicer than the Tahoe. Yeah, and it really is nicer. I never really liked the Lincolns. Even the Navigator.

Something I didn't care for, but definitely the Cadillac and the GMC versions over there with GMC are just great. I've been talking about air-conditioned seats for a while now. Now, part of it comes with Jackie's air conditioner until about a month ago when I fixed it properly. Didn't work well. Like, it really struggled to cool the car off. And I added the refrigerator in it, and I changed the blower assembly. And now it works great. But the whole time, it's hot.

And leather seats, I don't know why people love leather seats so much. Everyone agrees leather seats are the thing that you want. Except me. Like, dude, they're really hot. They don't breathe. They're sweaty. Like if your car is not really cold, like if you don't have a fresh, less than five-year-old air conditioner, I'm doing one of these deals afterwards, like airing out the T-shirt because I sat on a leather seat.

You're familiar with this, right? Yes. Yeah. And that doesn't happen with cloth. I have cloth seats in my truck, and it's not the same kind of thing. But I think because of that, air condition, Jackie's like, it's not that I love the leather seats, I love all the other stuff that leather seats means.

You know, if you have leather seats, no one has cloth seats and like air conditioned seats, nav systems, high end stereos and all, like I don't know if backup cameras have become more standard. If you literally would prefer cloth seats, you could special order a car, and it doesn't cost very much. Right. I hear you.

Because people would do that sometimes, you know, for some reason. They would want, like, something. They'd be like, I don't. Or a good reason. You know, sometimes they would want all the nice shit, but they don't want carpet in the truck. They're like, I don't want carpet in there. It's a work truck. So they'd want, you know, the rubber don't want carpet in the truck. They're like, I don't want carpet in there. It's a work truck. So they'd want the rubber

mats. So that would happen sometimes. And for some reason, some people would special order a manual transmission and they're driving daily F-150. But yeah, if you literally wanted cloth, you could do that. But the real thing to do is to get the air-conditioned leather

because then it's perforated with this cold air puffing through it and it's like sitting on an air hockey table made of soft leather we had it in sacramento and um it's great like all other air conditioning you know it really helps like once the car gets moving you know like it's not like you turn that remote start baby it's gmc yeah that that would be great uh and we even had it i just wasn't really used to it but it takes a second to figure out well lock and then start i don't like announcing that my car is starting and i'm still not near it a lot of the time yeah the thing is for us it just starts yeah i think at home it would make a lot of sense if you're like staying

at a hotel like you're not even in remote distance till you hit the parking lot and then what you go back to the eighth floor and let it cool for a bit it's a long distance i can start my car yeah from i do it in my bedroom like i'll wake up on like a cold morning and i'll be like that car is gonna be toasty as a motherfucker i'll take a shower by the you know that car will be running for 20 minutes by the time i get to it i open the door and it just heat bellows that billows out it's great have you ever uh remote started because i've done this before where i remote start my car when i'm like gonna go do some errands or something and like 90 minutes later i'm like oh fuck it turns itself off i've been running so long that it turned itself off yeah i don't know how long that timer is, but at some point it's like, well, I guess he's not coming.

That's great. And after it's all warm for him and everything, son of a bitch. This isn't good for me. Aren't we going to get any more eggs today, Kyle? I think that kid's taking that church gym back. I'm so jealous that you're holding gyms for like 30 hours. the longest i've

held one now is the longest i've held one is almost three hours with my best shit because as soon like most of the stuff around here is like if i walk up to it and i beat the gym as i'm walking away there's another group of people they're like let's take over the gym! I was looking at who my second in command is over at the First Baptist Church, and her gamer name is Junkie Princess. I'm going to have to get that Messenger app and find her.

She sounds like she's right up my alley. That's going to be great. Then I'll have this crazy, ridiculous girl riding around with me catching Pokemon. You could help me notice because you joined my gym. Yeah, exactly. You think this is the kind of gym you can just walk into? No dude?

How do you think this works? Oh, it's your first time. I'll walk you through it. So you haven't talked about it, but you have talked about dating and stuff. So I guess it's kind of out that you're not, your girlfriend moved out of the house no it's not out but but i guess you're gonna tell her well you just know because on pka you talked

about dating well we always had like an open relationship where i could fuck other chicks anyway so but yeah she uh she moved out um i forget i had a good place to go from there and now i lost it i did i it was, no, Kyle would approve of this line. Oh, oh, oh. How's the house with the extra space? Has that made a difference to you? Is that part of why you have another room event? I don't know what the... Yeah, yeah. Some of her stuff's... Well, not really. I guess... Because she took a lot of space because she had an Etsy business going on. And then that would make her take more space than a regular person.

Yeah, she was at the far end of the room that's to my left now, but I'm still not utilizing that space. Oh, sounds like a difference. That's where you're moving though, right? Yeah, that room is like the length of the entire, or the width of the entire house. So I don't know how long it is, maybe 80 feet or so. No, it's ridiculous.

I don't know how long it is, but that or so now it's it's ridiculous um i don't know how long it is but um that's where i'm gonna put all the vr stuff and i'm gonna put the uh the gaming tables and my gym and assemble all that stuff in there is that the train room no this will be the train room i'm gonna train in here right now it's upstairs in the living room because i i like i got it and immediately set it up but i'm gonna i'm gonna put it down here how big is the train set? It's not very big. Just enough to go around the bottom of a Christmas tree? Just enough to get the job done.

Yeah, about like that. Maybe seven or eight feet long oval, something like that. Nothing crazy. I'm going to Texas to do my explosives training on July 31st through August 3rd, which falls on a PKN, so we'll have to find a way I don't know if I'm going to be able to record it from there, if I can I'll do that, or otherwise we'll have to find some other way to record it

You've done it off your phone before I don't know if you're too remote for that Yeah, see that's the thing, I don't know where he's at I literally don't know exactly where he's at, but I know it's near the Texas-Mexico border, and it's a bomb range, so he's probably kind of out of...

Right, yeah, they tend to put those outside of the metropolis. Yeah, it's not like they blow stuff up there every weekend. Like, every day, all day, they're blowing stuff up there. So it's like uh so i'm gonna go take that class he's gonna teach me a lot of things so i'll learn how to do all kinds of cool shit from shape charges to safety procedures to you know manufacturers and uh and all that stuff it's gonna be really fun lots of high explosive training um i might film some of it i'll see if he's okay with that i don't know if it's gonna be like it's probably gonna be like a one-on-one class, just he and I. But if there's

other people there, that would make it easier, obviously, to kind of record when I talk to them. But I don't want to be like, tell me how to do it. This is for later. It sounds like a really fun trade show. Like where you show up and instead of like a stupid annoying business where it's like you know well the reason you should invest in our plastic forks as opposed to their plastic forks or whatever the fuck this is like you learning about bombs and guns and destroying things from a real not to say you're not an expert in it but from like a guy who's devoted his life to it purportedly yeah that's what he gets that's what he does for a living he's done demolition work um he's done um he was on cnn the other day to show them what what that the one pound c4 charge would have done to that guy in uh dallas so he demonstrated that for them he blew up a wall

with this with a pound of c4 and showed him and everything so yeah he's uh he gets he's been on a few tv shows he's always an explosive guy for that. As both a practical, this is the guy who's going to come and do the explosions, and also as an in-front-of-the-camera talent. So he is the guy who does the best, best Sling Blade impression you have ever seen in your life. Mm-hmm.

Now, let me tell you, when this guy... I'm glad he's gone. We're going to talk about Sleepless Little. When this guy has the same hairline as Carl from the movie, you know how it's like real thin on top? And he has the same shaped head. And he's not as heavy set. But I swear to God, he puts his head forward

and furrows his brow and does his lips. He's just a bomb. Don't his lips. It's just a bomb. Don't be scared. It's just a bomb. Some folks call it C4. I call it a good time. I swear to God, he looks and he does the impression

so well that I was embarrassed to even do mine in his presence. It was so good because he had everybody at the table laughing their asses off. I'm like, Woody over there, he doesn't think it's funny. Woody needs to come back and do some of his knee slapper impressions. Oh, man. That kind of like weird asymptotically approaching Indian, but you never hit it. That's all of his accents are asymptotically approaching Indian, but you never hit it. That's all of his accents are asymptotically approaching Indian.

Yeah, I think it's because he worked with so many Indian people that he got a little bit of a handle on what they sounded like. But yeah, that's the guy who's doing the training class. I think it's going to be fun. He's a cool guy. I've hung out with him before. It's going to be awesome. I'm looking forward to blowing some shit up so

is that gonna be something so you said he just he's because has demoed buildings before is that something that if you wanted to do that after he's giving you like a training course you could go and they could say all right so i i assume the way they would do it is there'd be like an engineer there who would be not an explosives expert be like all right this is what we need here and then you would do it no i don't know the particulars of that i would imagine that i would need some sort of certification to work within specific locales like i bet if i wanted to do some demo work in chicago then i would need some more paperwork than i've got right now like some kind of civil engineering stuff me i don't know you know you would think

that but i swear to god like i thought there was going to be a lot more um things to a lot more certification required for the licensing that i've already got um already you know i can i can get on the phone and order some c4 and they'll send me the c4 and the blasting caps and the detonators and all that stuff and then you. I can go do some blasting with it if I wanted to. I'm all hooked up and licensed to do all that. For all I know, yeah, I could go demo a building on my own if somebody would pay me to do it.

They'd be like, so what have you demoed before? I'd show them a couple FPS Russia videos. Well, hang on a minute. This is my demo reel. They're like, oh, dear God! No, no, no, no on a minute. This is my demo reel. They're like, oh, dear God. No, no, no, no, no, thank you.

It shows you've got experience demoing 1982 Ford Pintos and budget toilets from Home Depot. Is that correct? Yes, yes, not just budget. We go full scale sometimes, depending. Not low flow for us. I mean, we have some principles here. Some of those are good high end toilets. You have to be.

Low end toilets you get punctured by the porcelain more. I don't know. I think that's one of the most dangerous things if you're close to it. Those things are just sharp. Where's the glass? I feel like... I'll i will i will leave you guys got 14 more minutes show to do you're on your own i fucking hate it what's that bow behind you kyle is that

your is that a compound bow or is that just a cool looking like lord of the rings bow that is yeah it's a recurve hunting bow. I'll grab it. I thought you were going to do that thing where he pulls another of what he has behind him out from in front of him. That's a really neat and unique weapon you have behind you and he goes, oh, they sent me eight!

I've never gone bow hunting. Fuck! I think he dropped his AR-15. It's alright. It has a bayonet on it, though. Like, it probably did some damage to something. Mayhaps. Alright, let's...

Let's make sure that's steady first. Yeah, so this is... It's hard to get it all in frame because it's so fucking big. But I don't know, to show you what the ends look like, maybe that will give you some idea. Whatever that says. Martin. What's the pole on it? 60, well, it says here somewhere. I bet it's not.

Probably 80? 55. 55. So it's not too hard, and you're not holding it back, and there's no let-off, obviously, because it's a recurve, but you just kind of pull them back and let them go. Huh. I don't think I'd

bow hunting that much. It seems like it'd be so much harder and not that much more satisfying. But that could just be because I've never hit something with an arrow. And maybe when I hear that dull thud like it's an Uruk-hai on Pelennor Fields, then I'll suddenly know that satisfaction.

Pelennor Fields, you say. The neck. Where are Pelennor Fields in the game? In the movie? What's that? Where are the Pelennor Fields in the movie? Well, the Battle of Pelennor Fields, there game? In the movie. What's that? Where are the Pelennor Fields in the movie? Well, the Battle of Pelennor Fields. There actually weren't Uruk-hai there.

That was when... Outside of Minas Tirith. That's Pelennor Fields. Oh, okay. Yeah, sure. Outside of Minas Tirith. Between Minas Tirith and Askelia. I want to watch the trilogy again.

I should just like, Hey, you know what? Today's vlog is me doing fucking nothing. Have all three of them lined up for the big screen. What would make it interesting is if you literally watched the whole extended trilogy in one sitting. Because that is an experience that's a little different than just watching the Lord of the Rings over the course of a week or two. If you sit there for 11 hours and 45 minutes or whatever it is, and actually watch all that shit,

you might have a better understanding. But I think you'll have a hard time, you know, like not getting distracted by something unless you'd like lock yourself into it. Dude, yeah. I've become so distracted by everything all the time. I pretty much watch, if I ever watch a show,

which is pretty rare, unless it's one of the big ones. But I have a laptop on my lap a lot for these things. I just don't always give shows my full attention like it used to be standard practice. Check this thing out. You gotta give yourself,

or you gotta give Lord of the Rings, I guess, all the attention if you're gonna watch it. Oh, that's awesome. That does look cool. Kyle's got his bayonet on his AR. That's awesome. But yeah, Lord of the Rings, you'd really like it if you sat down and you really gave it a fair shake. And I have the problem of instead of watching it. I've seen all the Lord of the Rings movies several times and I've read every book no i mean like fair shake is in like uh

like it's like no you should give it a shot like that's totally not fair i've seen them all like i haven't watched them in one sitting but uh yeah if you sit and watch all the extended editions at once like it's not 12 hours it realistically though it's like 10 hours almost 10 but it's i don't know i have a lot of fun with it because i associate a lot of good memories with lord of the rings and it's a lot of fun because i like i still i was so fucking into that card game that of twice a minute during that show three times four times a minute i see a screenshot and i'll still remember every bit of game text on that card where i'll be like ah, ah, that was, you know, Raging Uruk. Nine strength, four vitality, damage plus one, cost four.

Like, all that nonsense. I like the other one more, but that's cool. I think, I don't know which one I like more. Yeah, this is, I don't know what the name of the skin is for people who play CSGO. It's really colorful and looks like graffiti. It's a monster biting something on the other side. Yeah. The one he showed initially was like a fade, I guess they called it, on the site.

Yeah, the rainbow thing. I forget what it's called. Case hardened. Case hardened, okay. Yeah, I like that one. You didn't get any tiger tooth, did you? I don't think so I got that spider pattern

Which I honestly don't care for very much I don't either They just sent this I didn't ask for this I think what happened was They sent us a lot of knives, to be fair I feel shitty complaining that I got some that I didn't want. But it was like, ah, that was the only one that I didn't want.

Because they sent like eight knives each or something like that. And I don't know. I think they're really good display pieces. I don't know much about bayonets, but I can't imagine that this is literally the best bayonet choice if I actually wanted to bayonet someone. But as far as a cool looking thing, I think it's really neat. And I'm going to put them on the wall, I think, whenever I get

the gaming... That room's painted. I'm covering fuse boxes today. I'm trying to come up with something that looks slick to cover the fuse box covers because they look like shit if you don't. I bought something silly. I don't think you want a knife that shiny in real life as a bayonet.

It's too nice. You need to have raccoons and curious critters crawling up and looking at it because it doesn't look the way a knife should, I guess, in battle. I guess most of those would be black if you're actually going to go bayonet someone. Yeah, I would imagine so. I don't think anybody's going in with a case-hardened bayonet. No, probably not. But those knives are really cool.

I just don't like the web pattern as much. But the tiger tooth one's really cool. I loaded up on those. What you got there? Dire wolf shield. Oh, yeah, I already saw that yeah I've been looking at that I bought it ah nice 369 99 you too can have a dire where dire wolf shield of house Stark elite war shield I just saw a made item

materials wood leather and steel so it's the real deal uh we'll stop attacks from men up to five four women up to five nine it um it doesn't say any of that oh it does it's not yeah it's a half inch red oak and it's leather and it's steel that's awesome we have a game of thrones room and we have like a spot over the mantle and we've been looking for a long time to put something there my wife has no idea i ordered it i'm not sure that this will be an approved purchase but hey i'll rebuy that thing from you it's a perfect thing they also have the uh the hound's helmet i don't know if you saw it um but they have a full-size replica of the hound's helmet which looks really impressive i bought it on j 2nd. I just looked at my receipt. It should be coming sometime this month.

I look forward to that. Yeah, that's awesome. I've been looking at Game of Thrones related stuff to stick in my room. There's two or three shields that you can get. They're all a similar quality. Don't you think we'd be the Starks? I guess everybody thinks of themselves as the good guy. I'm totally a Stark in this thing.

I don't know. Oh, yeah? I can see how the Freys are really pissy. You know? Like, if you actually look at the history of how they were treated for so long, you can kind of get like, ah, yeah, everybody really did poop on the Freys. He didn't show up for the fight, though. They were cowards remember they called him the late Walder Frey

because he showed up for battle after the fighting was already done I mean I thought he did that as well as like a fuck you to them I think he's just always trying to weasel himself into power in the book I thought they clearly said he waited to see who the victor was and join that side

you're probably right I just misremembered i just i almost i want to feel bad for their house some because they're all so ugly and they all wear terrible bonnets and it looks dark and their food is the only house in the kingdom where george rr martin spent one line describing it you know a pot of tepid stew went over the old man's lips as he grimaced at his six-year-old bride for not performing as as you know anticipated but the uh the terrells are pretty cool i don't really have a yeah fuck them i i guess i'd be stark or oh there's no snow one i wish there was one just for all the bastards in the show. Yeah, they don't have their own house.

They should band together, though. They have a rough time. They have a very strong one. I saw a fan theory on Game of Thrones that Daenerys was going to turn into the ultimate bad guy on the show, that she would be the major heel in the last two seasons that Jon fights against I would disagree with that one strongly

because there's no way that they could have a battle while that army of the undead are marching because that's going to be the real problem again wild fan theory stuff but people act like Bran is going to go back in time to build the wall and to do all this stuff with the help of the children who are currently dead, but not back in time. Yeah, I think that maybe.

There was a line. Do you know when? Bran the Builder? So when Bran was hurt after falling down off the wall, there was a nanny or nan or grandma or whatever who cared for him, and she often read these stories. And she said something like, you know, I get all you brands confused. You seem like all one and the same to me.

Because she would tell stories from the old days. And the implication that people are getting from that now is that brand the builder and there's a bunch of brands throughout Stark history are all him bouncing around through history getting these things done. is that Bran the Builder, and there's a bunch of Brans throughout Stark history, are all him bouncing around through history getting these things done. And the theory is that that's how he's going to deal with the White Walkers, not so much fight them head on now.

Although, here's a little bit of a time paradox problem there. If all of these people have memories of Bran going back and being Bran the Builder and Bran the Shithead and Bran the Sheepherder. The Raper. He's got to stop in one timeline just to rape someone.

I'm Bran the Raper! You can't be that bad, I'm crippled. Just a lot of flopping around, really. You have to be on top. He's not crippled when he goes through history. Do it. He walks around.

So what I'm getting at is that because we already have people who have memories of Bran the Builder, it doesn't make sense for them not to also have memories of anything else that Bran plans on going back in time and doing. You know what I mean? anything else that Bran plans on going back in time and doing. You know what I mean? So it would be like... So if they do show Bran going back in time and changing things, it's not like he's going to change anything from our current path anyway because their memories implied that he's...

You know, it's part of a time loop. It depends on how you handle time travel, right? Like, the Back to the Future model of time travel would disagree with you no I wouldn't it would because now you go back in the timeline and change it right and create an alternate time he's but what you're what you're the core of the theory is that he's already went back in time and changed things and become brand the Builder and all these other brands and for the narrative to move forward in the story at all, featuring time travel, he would have to be like,

all right, let's go back in time and change things. And then he becomes Brand the Builder and all the other brands. But then what's the other thing he does that affects some change on his current timeline? He has to do something back in time that he hasn't already done if he is supposedly Brand the Builder. It just doesn't make any sense. I hear what you're saying, and I follow the

time travel thing too. I'm just saying it seems like there's still room to tweak the timeline or something. I don't know. Not from a narrative standpoint in 13 episodes though. Because he'd have to make two trips back. He'd have to go back

and change a bunch of shit, and then a season would go by and be like, you know what? I went back and made all the things that we already had happen, but now I'm going to go back and do a new thing. I just don't see that being plausible. I love the idea of it. I love the idea of it.

And him, you know, because I really liked that Hodor, with the whole hold the door thing, when you have that realization that, oh, it's been part of the plan the whole time. I liked that Hodor with the hold the door thing when you have that realization that it's been part of the plan the whole time. I liked that. I thought that was cool. I wish that were the case, but I don't think that's true.

I look forward to the way... I want to see how it wraps up. I feel like the next two seasons are going to have a lot of plot advancement. We'll look back at it and be like, yeah, the last two seasons and two episodes of the third to oldest season, the one we just saw,

did as much as the seven years before it or six years before it. Like, the last two years are as much as the six years leading up to them. And that's, we'll see. I'm more anxious about them just fucking up in some way with the show than i am concerned about how it's actually going to end up because now i'm kind of panicking with like well shit like this isn't a lot of time to wrap this up did you um did you

see that it's not coming out till summer as opposed to spring yeah yeah it's wait is it still 10 episodes per no season or now it's seven per season uh seven and six seven then six yeah oh no oh okay wait so it's seven this season and then the next season is just rumored to be six so they probably don't even know themselves okay um yeah i just i i hope it ends up turning out alright the whole story of it it sucks when the last season of a show just is not good and then the whole memory of the show

has to be tempered with that last season normally they start filming in July but because winter is coming at the end of season 6 they're pushing off filming to the colder months. So instead of the episodes starting to air in March, April,

they're not airing until summer. So hopefully it turns out. All right. Yeah. We got a while to wait. And I don't know when Ricky Morty comes out. I've heard the 26 thing reconfirmed and stuff. I'm not getting my hopes up.

Yeah? It seems like they would be sneaky. Just do that seven days from now. They haven't nailed that down? They're still keeping it a secret that it's going live in seven days? Yeah, at that point, it's just kind of bad business. Right? I got this great business idea no advertising no we're gonna release this huge huge show that everybody's wanting but the get this we're not gonna tell anyone as a matter of fact we're only gonna release it on hulu maybe

one of us will tweet about it i don't know know. That's what Louis C.K. did. Oh, his shows have been booming. His shows are not very good. Horace and Pete? As much as I kind of like him. I liked Horace and Pete, but it wasn't fun, right? So when he described it, he

was like, there's no laugh track out there, and it's not all jokes, but when there is a joke, you put it out there, and it just sort of lays there. And, like, you know, there's no one there to laugh track out there and it's not all jokes but when there is a joke you put it out there and it just sort of lays there and like you know there's no one there to laugh at it because it's not a funny situation i i watched the whole thing i don't recall any jokes laying there or laughed at or there's just no funny in it it was good it was powerful. I got to the end. I felt sad. It's set up in such a way that there won't be a sequel. I don't watch any of... I don't like any of his stuff.

Louis C.K. has never entertained me. I don't get it. I want to like him because everybody seems to. It's not entertaining. Horace and Pete is not entertaining. But it's moving. And that in itself, like I'm always impressed when some fictional story moves me. And it did that, but, you know.

I haven't watched Horace and Pete, but I've watched. Wait, am I missing? Please tell me what it's really called. You're about to make fun of me. I was watching Louie or Lucky Louie. I think it might be called Horace and Pete maybe Horace and Pete is another show he's made I have no idea I just I've only seen some of Louie and Lucky Louie and it really is yeah I have the name like in the beginning of the show I think it was Louie I could be mixing them up it was actually pretty funny and more light-hearted and then it just devolves into this big pout fest of it's it's

like a dark humor and sadness masquerading around as though it's deeper than it is you know where it's like oh man look at me i'm living this deep life single dad kind of with my two kids and in this big city with only all the money in the world to support me. Oh, my God, what's going to happen? Because in the show, he is Louis C.K., a wildly popular comedian who's a millionaire. And so it's really hard to put out the vibe of, like, oh, woe is him. Like, wow, raising those two kids with only a few million in the bank and everyone on your side, whew.

It's, I don't know. So Horace and Pete him check out this cast all of his appearances on ONA way from years ago he was really funny on ONA and that's why I liked him and you guys have both missed something really significant in entertainment this is Louis CK Steve Buscemi Buscemi Alan Alda Jessica Lange Stephen Wright know, the one-liner comedian. He's funny. Kurt Metzger, this is a huge cast. He plays a smaller role. But the two biggest roles are

Louis C.K. and Steve Buscemi, and then Alan Alda is probably the third biggest role. I'll have to check that out. Maybe I'll eat my words because I really like Steve Buscemi a lot. Steve Buscemi delivers a powerful performance, but it's not fun. You know?

Yeah. I don't know. It's almost like if season two of Bill Burr's show, it ends up that the character he plays, the dad, is diagnosed with skin cancer in the first three minutes, and then it's not like, oh, look at these wacky times in the 70s it's you know a commentary on the lack of medical access

these lower income families had back in the day I mean my god think about it the implication like just silliness like that I don't know I feel like these comedians they get out of their depth when they try and get too artsy not to say they can't. Which show is this? I was talking about bill burr's show

the cartoon that would be as though him he did that he doesn't do that it's a comedy show yeah he's not trying to make big social platform issues or speeches but that seems like louis has moved that way like his last two specials have been not funny and i go into those wanting them to be funny because i i think he's a really funny guy are you grading him harshly though like like i i like the whole you know but maybe thing like it was funny i i'll admit i wasn't i swear i can't get a he can't get a chuckle out of me i i've watched like three of his specials the ones on hbo the ones on netflix i've watched them all and like like i'll get like they're like an hour long roughly. And I'll get

like 40, 50 minutes in and I'm just like I've had enough. Like there's no way he's just going to close strong and it's going to be all worth it. This is fucking terrible. And that's just my opinion of the guy. I'm sure he's done funny stuff. I guess he's a funny guy because everybody loves him. But I'm still waiting

to see him do a funny thing. I can't tell you how how little i like him i like bill burr and i enjoy his specials and stuff he like don't let me knock bill burr but i feel like more than most comedians he's so much delivery like bill burr could tell a bad joke and a bad story and have me laughing about it but then later like upon reflection, it's like, you know, that was just kind of shit. I watch his one-man podcast sometimes and watch. There's nothing to see. And I'm just like, dude, you were taking so fucking long to tell you a story. There's no one interrupting you, yet you still can't stay on track. And then he circles back to it. But he'll go like seven

minutes off topic and then circle back around and get back to where he was. to it. But he'll go like seven minutes off topic and then circle back around and get back to where he was. And it's like this is just hard to listen to. I love that. I think it's hilarious. I like the freeform stream of thought thing. Do you listen to a lot of it? I listen to it every week, yeah.

Okay, yeah. I've been listening to a lot of excerpts. I heard him talking about Goodfellas the other day. I thought that was just – I was like, wow, this is great. The reason I asked Taylor if you watched a lot of it is because I thought it was funny at first and now it has just wore the fuck out on me.

I detest it. I'm like, oh my god, you fucking ADD piece of shit. Would you just have a coherent thought and story in your head? There are people who are good storytellers, right? Kyle's a good storyteller. And the story flows from A to B.

His stories take wild detours into, would you get back to the point land? And, like, Bill, I love you, man. But, God, get back to the point. Just like everything, it's all personal preference. Like, I guess I've got used to it because i've listened every week for years now to the monday morning podcast and i like when he you know it's like oh you wouldn't fucking believe what happened to me yesterday uh i started out at breakfast i was having these waffles what the fuck's up with waffles or whatever the hell he

does and he riffs for a while on something else i like that it's like creative and fun for me to see like how his brain works yeah how his brain works that's a good way to say it and i also i like comedy where delivery is a lot of it because i think that takes a lot of skill and knowledge of your audience like he does to know exactly how to deliver something in that way and make it uproariously funny as opposed to let's say i said the same thing as him and it just falls on deaf ears because i just didn't do it right you know i think that's a really impressive i'm more impressed when the writing is super strong like i think that's neat uh yeah yeah you could name some of the better ones chris rock is in my head eddie murphy's in my head these These guys would tell jokes and I could retell them and they'd be funny.

I don't know. Remember when Michael Scott that's what HR came for. Michael Scott was literally retelling the different kinds of black people joke. He's butchering it. He's trying to amp himself up into it and he's like, every time, every into it when he's like every time every time screaming like a black guy oh i i have to watch the office it like maybe an episode at a time

because it's so teeth grindingly uncomfortable like parks and rec is a similarly shot show and it has some uncomfortable moments with some of the characters. But it doesn't even touch the level of awkwardness and stomachache that The Office will give you when Michael Scott walks in. I used to hate Michael Scott's guts, and I still do to some extent. And I don't know, after the fifth or sixth time I watched through the entire series, every episode, now I'm just waiting for him to do a stupid thing i still don't like him i still like hate him as a person and if i were a part of that office i'd have dimed him out to corporate years ago and took and taken his job because he is terrible at everything he's terrible at everything he is literally mentally retarded he is he is He is the worst kind. He is awful. It's absurd

that he's in that position. He leads the most successful branch, and he's actually really competent. He doesn't, though. It's always on the cusp. It's always on the bottom. There was one point in the show, yeah, in season four, when his branch is doing well, and they're like he has this

dinner with David Wallace where David Wallace is trying to figure out what's going on. The reason he does well is because there is no boss at Dunder Mifflin. There's a madman and everybody else has to work extra hard and pick up his slack. Everybody else is good at their job. I need to watch it again. But my recollection is that office is always the best in a bad company. And the other offices are all getting shut down.

best in a bad company and the other offices are all getting shut down you know the reason that that cute girl that kind of liked uh jim jim thank you comes over her office got shut down uh yeah utica um but but see that's as the show progresses yes there is a point later on when they went to be convenient to the plot they made done actually what the reason that dunder mifflin was on the bottom they were going to shut dunder mifflin down but remember uh the boss from from the uh from unica or whatever he leveraged his new position as regional manager to get a job at staples so now they don't have a now they don't have a boss. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So then they give Michael Scott control of the whole thing and they bring all the people

from Unica to come work for Michael Scott. He fires or they quit every single one except for one. And it was yeah, every one of them quits or is fired. Every single one of them by the time it's over. The black guy, he exposes

as an ex-con through racism and some sort of prison bigotry runs him out. The fat guy, he literally tries to lift onto a table by force and the guy's like, I'm not comfortable with your management style. I quit. He's like, no, you don't quit. You're fired.

So now they gotta pay him severance. He is just a bleeding wound under mifflin like it's funny like i remember the scene at chili's where he landed the paper sales and he was curiously competent right do you remember that that was because and it but you gotta be you gotta be careful there you gotta look at who he's selling to he's selling to that the black guy from uh snl who is like clearly also a doofus. It just so happens that Michael Scott's sense of humor meshes with that guy perfectly. He just fell

into that. It worked. Yeah, you're absolutely right. He sold that like no one else could. He does that a lot from time to time. That's why he should be in sales. I just feel like he's accidentally curiously competent. At sales. Yes. yes yeah i would say

okay he's kind of the example of the person who did well in their sales position and so they were like okay you know you're the best salesman so you go to management and then it ends up that everybody who's good at sales is not necessarily good management he sucks ass at all of his responsibilities in there which is why he's ass at all of his responsibilities in there which is why he's constantly walking out of his office going like or whatever he does trying to strike up a conversation because he doesn't know what he's supposed to be doing and he doesn't want to be doing it so he just distracts his whole yeah he's not a good boss and he's an idiot but that's like okay so dwight was a terrible boss, right?

He got in there. He immediately fired his six-shooter, and everything was terrible. But then by the end, remember when Dwight did a recap? He's like, yeah, my assistant manager is my best man at the wedding, and I've got this, and I've got that. And you're like, you know what? When you really tally score, this is going okay. And while I don't have the stats to back it up,

I really felt like Michael Scott was in a similar position. Like, you know, look, the paper industry is getting killed by these like bigger, lower margin companies like Staples. But when you really take score, he's making the best of a bad situation. That's how I recalled his whole success. To me, it's the whole office pitching in to keep him propped up. And they sort of do that for one another,

and that's what the show becomes about. You know, they all need each other. And he does see it as a family. You know, he sees the office as his family because he doesn't have a family. Managers get success for that, though. Like, you know, like, if it's like the only reason this is successful He sees the office as his family because he doesn't have a family. Managers get success for that, though. If it's like the only reason this is successful is because he's built a really good team that works hard,

yeah, that's his gig. That's what they do. But the thing is, if you put anyone else in there, it would, well, not some of the people they put in later. There were worse bosses than Michael Scott, it turned out. Will Ferrell. later like there were worse bosses than michael scott it turned out because i mean the ship kind of the whole show kind of it's it's a real downturn once michael scott leaves and they start in injecting new people into the end of that position over and over um i i don't like it as much at that point but michael's a fuck up i would i would not work for michael oh no i would dime him out so fast for for any one

of his many violations for whether it was sexual harassment or misusing office supplies or you know constantly having liquor at our office parties like in like season one toby is like michael you you can't have alcohol at the party he And he's just like, Toby, no! No! And Toby's just like, what's wrong with you? Michael just keeps going. You can't have alcohol at office parties. That's a thing.

I mean, I'm sure it's company to company. At Cisco, when I started there, they had, yeah, they had every Friday afternoon there was literally like a keg rolled in at Cisco for the first two years I worked there. Were there a lot of ladies working there? They had, yeah. They had every Friday afternoon there was literally like a keg rolled in at Cisco for the first two years I worked there. Were there a lot of ladies working there? Yeah, there were karaoke machines. Interesting. Sounds like a real party environment. That everyone didn't

want to go and be the first one to use. Sat there brand new for years. I bet Indian people love karaoke. I bet that's a thing about them. I don't know. Do they? No. They're too shy. They're a pain in the ass they like like with like with a shy american guy you'd be like come on come on come on and enough peer pressure and they'll you know give in and it's fun for everyone including them with indian guys

it's just like like they won't fucking budge it'll never happen it's like if you try to do the same sort of like come on you, we're all doing it. I did it. I look silly, but it was a good time. You should do it. They just turn it more sour and less fun until you give up. It's awful.

They're no fun. I think that a lot of Asian countries, karaoke is really big, so that surprises me. I've heard that about Japan. I guess they're not one of the fun ones. Or at least not the IT variety of the Indian guys. I'm sure there are some fun Indian people. Just not in IT at Cisco.

We'll call that a wrap? I think so. That was fun. Alright. Shit. You guys have been off screen for part of the show. all that a wrap? Yeah, I think so. That was fun. Oh, shit. You guys have been off screen for part of the show. I see the issue. Well,

someone will be upset with that. Oh, they'll be fine. I'm sure they'll be very kind about it. It won't be an issue. Alright, PKN episode 101. See ya.