Painkiller Already - PKN #110

Episode Date: September 29, 2016

It's PKN time baby!

Painkiller Nearly, episode 110. Wow. Can you guys not hear me? You're all fucking with me. So did you plan this in advance, or did it just work out? No, no, no. We've just got a connection. That's all it is.

Yeah, just went with it. Dying of fire. Okay, so Josh texted you? Yeah, so Josh was supposed to come over today. Today is Monday, and we were going to move a lot of stuff around. I got an air hockey table, a lot of gym equipment, a lot of weights. You know, it's literally 45 pounds. In fairness to Josh,

when was the last time that he confirmed that today would be the day? Yes, that... Last night. Last night. That today was the day at 8 p.m. Hmm. Right. You know. Okay. Hmm. Right.

You know. Okay. So he says, I have a question. Question mark. But keep in mind, he's not going to ask a question here. So don't let that fool you. Just letting you know he has one.

Yeah. Yeah. He's saving it. Yeah. This is for later. Hmm. Okay. I have a question.

Mark. My girlfriend has a doctor's appointment about this arm that's broke and where she had the surgery. Can I comb in the AM and get there a little earlier to help you comb at like 10 or so in the AM, maybe 11, or when it's good time for you? You can't drive, she can't drive, and the arm she's broke is the one she uses, man. I like the use of

Al Little, the little-known cousin of Alot. Al Little. Al Little. Then I say, you know, yeah, man, that works, 11 tomorrow, okay? He says, yeah, man, that works. 11 tomorrow, okay? He says, thanks, man. I'm sorry I'm having to work around this stuff. I didn't know any of it was going to happen.

It hit me all at one time, man. But I'll see you at 11 in the morning. Take it easy. So the problem here, the reason he should have seen this coming is because he's like 20 years old dating a 42 year old woman and no offense woody because i know you're right in that bubble zone but i think that you know that like it's different for men and women but it's just bizarre for this 20 year old man child to to be dating this

42-year-old woman. I know he's gotten her pregnant twice before, and he's always like, oh, we lost the baby. I don't know why. And I'm like, because she's 42. That was her third to last egg. That was the last. That's it. Sometimes I ask myself, I was like, do we need to use protection? And Jackie's like, yeah. You know, like the menopause is like 10 years away and i'm like yeah but come on like really like people our age have such a hard time having babies can we not just roll the dice on that assume we won't have a baby then she's with kyle that uh yeah yeah it seems easy for you to say.

But, yeah, so he's dating this 42-year-old woman, and then, of course, last week they got taboned, and her arm was broken in three places. And, look, I want to scream in his ear with advice and be like, get away from her! She's 42, and she's dumber than you are and that's really because you are dumb now come in here and get pick up that crayon we're gonna help would you say that she's a little dumber she's she's a little dumber than he is yeah and it's unfortunate and i'm not saying this to be cruel. They're just slow people.

They really shouldn't be together. It's good that they're not breeding, though. They're trying. They're trying so hard. It's not going to happen, right? Mother Nature is like, oh, shit. Pull the plug on that one. That cannot happen. That is an abomination that's being created.

It's terrible because he lives with his parents he doesn't have any source of income at all um he just has and i mean just has with the help of myself and my dad and other people gotten a vehicle with insurance and the uh the ability to keep gasoline in it he just has accomplished that in life. How old is he again? 20. I think 20. And it's like he's trying

to take on being a father at the same time and looking after this crippled 40-something-year-old woman now. And it's like, dude, why aren't you at the lake right now or in school or working a job? Pick one of the three.

Is health insurance covering this? I don't like asking questions like that because he won't know the answer and she won't either, and so it would just get real complicated. So just let it be. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll see him tomorrow. I'll ask him then when I can like you know gesture a lot and uh and and point and stuff i don't like uh the fact that she's 42 and he's 20 and it's it

that's way different than like you know let's say i'm 50 or something and i marry a 40 year old or something like that it's way different like even A guy being 20 and a woman being 42, that's an insurmountable power dynamic in the relationship. He's almost like another one of the kids. It doesn't seem like there's no way that he is getting as much out of this relationship as he is having to put in, and that's intrinsically unfair to him. If he was 29, things would be different. I feel like if he was 29, there's a lot of

worldly experience. Because the thing about 20, he still lives at home with his parents. He hasn't even seen world yet. He's just a post-high school child. And if he was 29 and he was out and sort of supporting

himself, he'd have a whole different perspective than a post-high school child like himself does. And like, to hear him like, he'll be like worried about his situation and like what's going on and to see him ponder over it, there's just this

part of me that wants to scream. And what I've been doing is like, well, if you ever want any advice, any honest advice, you just come to me and i'm just waiting on him to be like i need that honest advice and be all right take a seat i got you a notepad yeah what good will that do not even a little top i guess um i've had this powerpoint ready for years I'm a laser pointer some of the stats are old but the main message sticks clear

you know he's just like oh I don't know what I'm gonna do oh lord you're not gonna do anything you're not gonna do anything you're just going to stay at home and eat your parents food and like bum tens of dollars from people to put gas in the tank and that's like like like i don't want to we didn't give him money

we we we like loaned him money which he paid back and he works he's willing to work but the problem is that like he's barely willing to work well yeah i don't know why he's so unreliable. There's a chance that he's just incapable, and there's another chance that maybe he's got something else going on I don't know about. Or maybe he's with a controlling 42-year-old woman. Yeah, that could be it. He's got two mothers, essentially, at this point.

I'm sure they're both very... His mom is a real fucking cunt. She's super loud and boisterous. like she walks like a man and like like she's just this big anyway um the guy has a rough time of it and uh i i i i've been trying to get him a little bit of money but like god i can't stand being around him do you think he's dumb genetically or environmentally it's both um and that makes sense if you think about it because you know he's already he starts out genetically in a position

where he can't learn because his mother and father and everybody around him are stupid so he's not going to learn anything from so that environment just becomes double fold onto his already poor genetics i guarantee this wasn't the kid who and who was like a three-year-old like doing his abcs you know what i mean like like he wasn't that early developed kid or anything his mom didn't have like the bow's headsets playing mozart on her belly throughout the pregnancy no you don't think by the way i don't know how this transitioned to my kid but hope had her first speech competition on saturday and uh she beat everybody she got first place ah great all right nice did she

drive herself to that all on her own too no but there's a fair reason it's that um at these events if you can bring a parent that will judge it's a lot cheaper like it's just like it's like 150 so jackie went there too and actually i think hope did drive but jackie was in the passenger seat yeah i'm glad that hope's driving because i think that that's one of those things where like you get better at it so quickly and like every day you drive you're like more and more freedom and you start experiencing the positives of like driving on your own you like maybe you're like i'm really hungry in the afternoon i normally aren't oh look there's there's food i can i can do this like when you start solving problems that you never would have been able to solve before when someone someone's like oh my battery's dead what

am i gonna do and hope's there like aha here i am it's it's nice um so hope there's a couple things there's one like you said right that positive side and i think she's going to gather experience quickly because her drive to school is like 30 to 60 minutes each way right so this is a girl who's going to be getting like an hour and a half of driving a day uh she should really be racking up some experience in a hurry and uh the other part is take that hour and a half and double it for like when jackie had to like take her there and drive home and then drive there to pick her up like that's a big chunk of jackie's day that she's regained thank god yeah yeah that sounds oh that would suck so

is like is it a traffic heavy drive or is it just really far away like is it a pretty easy leisurely drive i mean it's not leisurely no there's traffic that's good yeah it? I mean, it's not leisurely. No, there's traffic. That's good. Yeah, it's it's bad It's not leisurely. Yes, she maybe that is what you wanted her to have like a hard drive But yeah that if she has to work and drive in traffic, that's good Like she's if it were like a leisurely country road drive to school every day She wouldn't actually be learning that much on the bonus So right now there's a gas shortage from like Atlanta to North Carolina Kyle is probably familiar with it too.

And it legit is. A bunch of gas stations shut down, and the ones that aren't shut down have long lines. And it means the roads are kind of empty. So her first week of driving is a little easier, and next week it'll probably be back to normal. I tapped into my backup supply. You have a backup supply of gas?

I got a few gallons here and there. I do too. Yeah, we're saving that as our plan B. Thus far, we've been filling up at the... Well, we have it for the lawnmowers, really. That ain't what I got it for. So we have 30 gallons when it's full, and it's just about full.

So yeah, we just keep that much on site and then whatever. But, yeah. I'm hesitant to – I'm not going to try to retell it, but I was just chuckling to myself. I heard Norm MacDonald on the Howard Stern Show tell him this hilarious fucking story today. Norm MacDonald's really funny. I really like him as a as a guest and everything he's got he's got a lot so many good stories what's uh funny i didn't like him during

what i'll consider the peak of his career like when he was on snl or even afterwards he did a few movies i was just like dude you're a dull low low-energy, stalling, dragging-out, boring talker. And then now that, like, I guess maybe he's better in doses because, like, now when I hear him, it's a pleasure. And he tells stories, and, like, the timing is, like, so perfect. And, like, people are cracking up just waiting for him. I am going to try to retell it. So he says um it was some sort of talent show or something at the at the school and all the little children were

uh were telling stories and most of them were trying to tell parables and this little girl told the story about how her mother had uh had eight chickens hatch from their eggs and then she had she had four more eggs um and then she she took all of her eggs and her chickens and put them in the wagon and took them to town. She was going to sell all 12 of her chickens. But it was a bumpy road. And along the way, the eggs cracked. Chickens made it though.

And what do you think the lesson of that story is? And of course the whole classroom says, you know, don't count your chickens before they hatch. Don't count your eggs before they hatch and uh little johnny in the back so i've got a story and the teacher's like oh god that's okay i said no no i i've got one of these all right it's it's about my uncle terry he was in vietnam and one day is his whole platoon hated him they hated Uncle Terry and one day he woke up just south of Da Nang with a big pile of armory

rifles, machine guns, explosives a big pile of Jack Daniels and nothing else, the whole platoon had deserted him left him behind he knew he had a mission to do though, so he started drinking from that bottle. He drank long and hard, and then he picked up the AK-47 and the knives and the grenades, and he walked into the jungle. And not long after, he came upon a village. And Uncle Terry didn't know, were these the people he was sent there to protect,

or were these the villagers that were working with the North Vietnamese, the people that he was there to kill? He didn't know what to do, so he took another long drink from that bottle. And he unleashed with the Kalejna Koft. And from right to left, he swept it across them like the farmer's scythe. And they all fell before Uncle Terry like the wheat in the field. The men, women, yes, the children, all fell before Uncle Terry until he was standing in the mud and the blood and the guts. He just took another long drink from that bottle.

And when his hand went back down by side he felt moisture and the fear of it all he had urinated on himself and he felt shame and then he rubbed it a little more he noticed that it wasn't urine at all it was it was semen and he felt proud proud at what he'd done. Because he'd completed his mission. And the teacher says, Dear God, Johnny! What could the meaning of that story possibly be? Johnny says, Terry's in that bottle. You best leave him alone.

When Terry gets to drinking, that's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it? That's it. That's it? That's how all of his stories are. He tells a huge long story and you expect a really clever payoff.

You expect in a movie, when you're in the last 15 minutes of a psychological thriller and you can't see the twist but you know there has to be one for the movie to make sense that's what you do with all of his jokes. You're looking like, okay, what does Terry have to do with the eggs? What does he, Terry and egg, Terry egg, what could that be? And then it just ends up to be fucking nothing.

On Letterman, he told this long-ass joke about, I think, like a butterfly or something or a bug that goes to a doctor's office for his kid's problem, and it's like three or four minutes of him slowly telling a stupid joke on David Letterman, and then the culmination of it is just... I know the culmination, yeah. He was at a podiatrist's office, and he's like, why did you come to me?

And he goes, oh, the light was on, because he was a moth. Because he was a moth, yes. Thank you for jumping in and saving that. I love his style of comedy. It's not something I could watch a ton of, but he really, really keeps you interested while you are watching. Because you don't know what that dude's going to say.

His cadence, the way he speaks, nobody else talks like that. Nobody leaves those spaces in between words. Yeah, I like it a lot. It's kind of like... Oh, what's his name? What's that actor? Christopher Walken. Christopher Walken. Yeah, that guy. It's a little bit like that. I like it a lot.

He was really good on Stern. He told a lot of funny stories. I can't really think of any of them right now besides that one. I thought that was hilarious. What's the parable of that story? He's like, Uncle Terry's been drinking. You just steer clear of him. You just stay away, because when he gets in that bottle, that's the whole...

That's funny. So last week on PK, we're talking to Harley about Shoe Nice, and we've talked about him before in the past. And so, I don't know which one of us was the biggest driving force behind it, but we all knew we wanted Shoe Nice on the show. And so i don't know which one of us was the the biggest driving force behind it but we all knew we wanted shoe nice on the show and so chis reached out to him and i guess uh two days

from now on thursday for pka this week we are going to have shoe nice as a guest and see how that goes um i watched a vice documentary type special about Shoenice that Chiz directed me toward. We all saw it, right? Yeah, we all saw it. Yeah, yeah. So I'm really interested in getting him on the show. I've got a lot of questions for him. I'm sure we all do, right?

Yeah. He's a very interesting, unique fellow. I didn't know nearly as much about him until i watched the uh the vice thing i'm sure if you just google shoe nice vice you'll find it but um yeah i'm hoping that he's willing to drink a lot of liquor or something and then eat a lot of paper or pennies or something else right after that's what i would like to see because that's his big skill and you know that's what we would want right like yes yeah i think i want that to be part of it chis was chis was like ah well what is he gonna do just come out and eat something and then what are you gonna do for three

hours and 59 minutes and i was like well we'll talk about what he just ate of course and it'll there'll be some lead up i think he needs to eat something and do a thing um but of course we'll interview him as we do in our own little way and ask questions about his past and his life and like why he eats stuff. And if it's, is it pica? Is that the disorder? When you eat things or compelled to eat things? I don't know if the guy's got pica or not. That's, it seems like he's just likes attention. So, so I think that's more likely um yeah usually people who have pika like they try and secretly like eat dirt and rocks and grass and things they're not toilet paper like they eat stuff they're not supposed to and they do it secretly because they're a little bit ashamed

of it and they're like i know i'm not supposed to eat construction paper every day but here i am again like they wouldn't go around being like, hey, everybody, look at me eating this stick of Elmer's glue. Like, because they'd... Or maybe they would. I don't know. I don't have that disorder, but that's... Did you ever eat anything as a kid that you shouldn't? Like, do you ever eat glue or anything like that?

I ate a couple of leaves after watching Land Before Time. Oh, yeah, Littlefoot. Yeah, I was watching Littlefoot eat some leaves, and I was like, it can't be that gross. Like, he's doing it. And then I ate a couple of leaves. Star leaves, rightfoot. Yeah, I was watching Littlefoot eat some leaves, and I was like, it can't be that gross. Like, he's doing it. And then I went and ate a couple leaves. Star leaves, right? Star leaves, yes.

I'll take land before it's time for 800. I looked for a couple of star leaves, and I still remember the sensation, because I went and I tried to find one in the forest behind my house. I was very little. And I was looking for one that kind of looked like a star leaf. And I just picked the one that looked similar ish. And I remember the feeling of putting it in my mouth and just like,

it was one of those like fuzzy leaves where like the top is a little bit furry and it feels like, you know what I'm talking about? And immediately I took a bite and I just felt like, I guess the cellulose and the nasty crispy crack and subsequent little feelers almost on the leaves on my tongue and it's like this is not at all what sarah and littlefoot and uh spike led me to believe it would be like um yeah that's all i can think of is stuff i wasn't supposed to eat i usually stuck to food

i watched that movie a lot of times i've seen the land like when i was a kid the land before time was very big it's a tv show right yeah i'm that they made a TV show and they made many sequels, but the first one had very good hand-drawn animation and voice acting. The rest of them are lessers of the very first one, but as a kid I watched the first one a lot. We had it on VHS, so it just got rewound and played again. I was so obsessed with dinosaurs that it was a real question I had for my parents and grandparents.

Why are there no Tyrannosaurus rex coming to try and eat Littlefoot's grandparents? They're clearly the older ones and more vulnerable. I was so fucking into dinosaurs at the time that I was genuinely confused why they wouldn't show. You know, the real struggle. The strife of being a plant eater.

Have I ever shown you those pictures of the dinosaur footprints out in Texas you may have yeah it's pretty cool it's like an allosaurus so it's like three big toes like much bigger than my boot that was cool yeah those things are neat I really don't like all of the

stuff you see online where they post like this is probably what T-Rex looked like and it's just some fat idiot bird with little arms and they're like see you thought it was this big cool armored lizard turns out it was just this shitty bird the whole time like people almost get glee it seems like out of shattering the cool dinosaurs that we know and love and replacing it with these feathered fucks that are just not very threatening looking which is what you you want in a dinosaur. That's what makes them cool is that they're intense. You know, tiny brains,

lots of muscle. They don't give a fuck. Right. They should be alligators that can stand up and chase you and shit. Yeah. But they weren't blooded. No, they weren't. I think they were. I'm not going to disagree with Taylor on this topic.

Well, I don't know because usually really large warm-blooded predators like that it would they would have to take in so many calories to keep their body that temperature like that's why big predators that are reptiles are cold blooded right so they only have to eat every so often like i don't know anything about dinosaurs bloodedness but i always assumed that they were cold-blooded. Don't you remember Jurassic Park where, I think it's always been this big thing, were they cold-blooded or were they warm-blooded? And there's this part where he's like,

they are warm-blooded. When he finally sees the dinosaurs and everything. We don't know if they're warm-blooded or not. They're dinosaurs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Steven Spielberg solved that one for us. Yeah, I'm fine imagining them

as Steven Spielberg depicted them because it's not like I'm ever going to see one and be like, ah, I had it wrong the whole time. Look, there he is. Like, it's never going to happen. So I could just have my magical version of what a Tyrannosaurus looked like. Yeah, we should be able to live in the past a little bit.

Like, if it came out today that the Trojan horse actually was just a complete piece of shit that just a bunch of retarded trojans brought him and then like the general the trojans later was like why would you bring that in you idiot like but no are like the history because the greeks get to tell it is that they built this beautiful horse that they were they duped those buffoons into pulling into uh their city into city into Troy but like you want that whole story was from the get-go like that was that was not meant to be

believed though the actual story of a Trojan horse yeah yeah I don't think anything like that actually happened but you know if it did come out kind of like the Noah's Ark thing where every few years they post hey we found Noah's Ark again found it, and it's like some either way too good looking of a boat to be believable or way too shitty and small to be believable because both sides have an agenda or something like that. The challenge with the Bible story is the problem isn't that it's false. The problem is that you promised it was true, right?

It isn't that it's false. The problem is that you promised it was true. You're hanging your whole argument on this infallibility of God and the truth and that every word in this book is one to hang your hat on. And then when stuff that's just really crazy talk comes through, like every animal being on one boat and saving it through and et cetera, then it's like, no, that just calls into question

the rest of it. This is not a new argument, but that's the thing. If they weren't so unrelenting on this, then their flexibility is their downfall, their inflexibility. Yeah, I don't know how many Christians still believe, like, literally the bible is the word of god and it's like it was actually six days of creation i know quite a few do oh yeah like

half of those people they're like well those days were you know they could have been thousand years million years it does say in genesis uh you know uh to the lord a day is like a thousand years and a thousand years is like a day it's like like, well, that's really fucking convenient. You can pull that shit. But that's part of the challenge, right? And they'll say like, all right, so this part, whether it was six days or 6,000 years, I'm flexible on.

But that part over there, where it says we need to kill gays and stone people for this and that, nah, there's no movement in this one. You must strike the gay on the head with the rod 27 times. They're like, 24, 25! Like, they're counting them out.

Yeah. They've been talking about years, all of a sudden we can get flexible. The shit about shellfish and fabric of mixed composition, that will let go. The gay thing? Oh, he was serious about that. He who has never even thought about gay sex, swing the 28th blow. That's a great story.

This is interesting to no one, but I'm very excited personally my paramotor helmet just today i got it going so that i can talk to other people and i can live com to my gopro at the same time and yeah i'm i'm very much hoping that like i don't know it just you know how gameplay is not about the gameplay like all my commentaries and stuff, historically, were just about whatever. I want to see you pee from the air. I want that to be one of them. When you gotta go, you gotta go.

And see you get in some weird position where you pee without pissing your pants. That'd be pretty neat. You know, I used to compliment Kyle on his video ideas. Oh, this would blow up. Imagine you have to twist so your penis is down and not blowing piss right onto you.

So you don't bring an empty Gatorade bottle for this pee. No, no. You just pee into the prop. Or you just pee forward, and as you're flying it's just... Just a misting of your own urine. But then by that point, you will have already started peeing, and so you'll have to see it through.

This helmet really comes in handy at times like these! This GoPro is waterproof and urine-proof! And watch this! My entire suit's storm-proof, it can handle a little piss. It's urine- it's semen-proof too. Then you have your little post-peace shiver and you go down. Oh shit!

I'm very excited about it. I'm hoping that I can be an interesting backdrop for times I just want to talk. Hopefully it'll be cool. We'll see. It'll be a whole other story. Yeah. You can land anywhere, Kyle.

Just do that. I thought it was bad bird shit on your head. I feel like that would be a revenge scenario, right? Like, imagine if a bird poops on me and you, like, fire it up. You know, like, all right, guys, let's get them back. You know? Take to the skies. I don't think you can catch a bird up there they're they're literally made for it there's a guy who kicked a bird up there

and uh yeah he he saw an owl and this owl like really captured his his like attention so i watched the video it's like 17 minutes long of him like chasing down this owl and like I don't know what owl exhaustion looks like but I think that's what I'm seeing. I'm thinking that these owls are great flyers but they don't usually like run for their lives for 15-20 minutes in a row and he eventually gets to it and he kicks it and I need to see it again. I don't think he recovered. I think he kicked the owl and he goes tumbling out of the sky and hits the ground and he may have killed the owl he just kicked an owl to death for the fuck of it it was well it was one kick but

he was in mid-flight so the owls are really highly protected and the fact that he did it from the air makes it worse i i hear you and the whole paramotor community like hates this guy and that's one of the things that they really he's done a few things that uh they don't like but kicking the owl is is like top of the list that was the thing like what else did he do besides kick a fucking owl that's shitty if i did a nature walk program where i was supposed to go out and show you like this is a birch tree this is uh you know uh lime grass or whatever made up shit i say like and then just in one episode on a whim i chased down a rabbit to the point of exhaustion

and then just give it the fucking boot side of the head boom i wouldn't i couldn't then just upload the video and be like all right guys thank you so much for joining me a lot of nature walk sometimes you got to fight back am i right like you couldn't do that so yeah the good thing this guy's taking shit you shouldn't just be able to if you do if you do it at least hunt down a garbage bird like if there's like a trap like a pigeon or something this was like five years ago so like people are not letting go of it and one of the things he does he shot from a paramotor like a pistol and uh i think it's one of those emotional bank account things where like because they all hate him they're making an even

bigger deal about shooting from his paramotor my issue was he had like brush like it was like a desert environment so picture like six foot tall brush and whatever to his left. And to his right he had water. If he had shot the water, I'd be really cool with it. Since he's like flying by, shooting in whatever like desert version of woods he's flying by, I'm like, like you're not sure sure what's in there. I know you know it to be a generally lightly populated area, but you're shooting on the land, like shooting the water, and we're all cool. You know those bullets are just splashing around, doing nothing.

Fish rights matter! Fish rights. Yeah, he could have shot and really accounted for where the bullets were going, but instead he shot in the brush. Well, that's pretty shitty, too. The problem where he went wrong was when he turned his camera on when he went owl kicking and air shooting.

Because, like, there's a place and time for just about everything. I mean, I probably wouldn't kick an owl. But if I had a paramotor, I'd probably want to shoot from it, too, especially if I'm out in the desert. But you probably shouldn't record it even if you know you're doing the right thing and you're being safe. Because I think it's against the law, eh? And that owl thing, that owl thing is big, is a very big deal. They're a federally protected species, and game wardens will hunt you down and put you in jail over doing something bad to an owl. He got away with it because it was like a helmet cam or something.

So there's really not, like, super definitive proof that it's him. Now, people that know him, like in the paramotor community, are like, dude, I know that voice anywhere. I recognize those thighs. Like this guy has a lot of footage of himself. That's kind of what you see because he's seated. And like, I don't know. Like when I was a kid, I could see a guy and know that that was

him surfing just by the way his body moved even though he was too far away to like make out his face um with this guy it's kind of the same thing like you know how he flies you know what he looks like you know what model paramotor he flies and you know all the owl hate speech he posts on social media yeah this is dragging on but yeah so anyway that he's done some bad stuff but he got away with it because like the police can't really be like oh i've identified your knees yeah yeah well that that is man i can understand accidentally killing a bird in the air because hit the prop they could definitely run into you or like you they and they're not very they're pretty delicate They have to be to fly around.

So even a big bird, like if you had a big eagle by the throat, and it didn't talon you, and you gave it a nice gut punch, that thing's done. It's not going to be like, oh, God, thank God I'm the king of the skies, and then jump back up. No, it's like, oh, my bird bones. Oh, they're all hollow, so I can fly. It's not prepared for this

like no it'd just be shards of bird bone and you couldn't even feed it to your dog because it could choke so that's all it would be but to seek to go oh look at that large majestic predator top of the food chain not the top anymore am i right fellas remember to leave a like and subscribe and then go after it i don't know that's that really shitty. I don't like that either. I I've broken. No, I've never broken rules of course. But if I were to say fly after sunset,

something you can't do, uh, there'd be no video of it on YouTube. Yeah. Um, cause you're not an idiot. Right. I can't believe he did that.

I, it's such a big deal. And I'm so like conscious of it because like hunting growing up we had the game wardens like always on our backs and like looking for any infraction and it was a big deal it was like you know you on the dove field a lot of times guys will drink so like the guy right next to me is fucking drunk i know he is but i mean no it's just gonna make his aim bad he's not gonna shoot anybody i don't fucking care it's me personally um but but the game warden comes out he's like oh you had a few to drink haven't you he's like yeah i've had a few he's like why don't you go sit over

there under the tree for a little while and let's just sober up and it's like all right this guy's cool but right before he got there you keep it the way a dove field works is you got like a dozen guys out in the field where the doves are coming to eat, and you're catching them between where they roost and where they eat while they're traveling, when they're coming a few at a time. Yeah, they're flying over.

So we're waiting on them, the 12 of us in this field, and I had the best spot because I've been scouting this thing for like a week, and I've been practicing non-stop, just just nonstop, thousands and thousands of rounds. And so I'm killing every fucking bird that comes in the field. And I see a hawk coming. And I'm like, oh, there's a hawk.

I kind of like drink my drink or whatever and kind of look back up at him. And right about the time I look back up at him, I hear boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And he just fucking crashes into the ground. And I'm like, what the fuck what the fuck like like this is as big of a deal as if an eight-year-old just got taken down like like like shot or something we're all like losing our minds and i i'm just like i'm just like it was either that guy or that guy and we're screaming get it off the field get it off the field because this is a federal crime that someone just committed someone will go to jail if the if the game ward comes and and the one and the guy's like i didn't shoot it you shot another guy's like

i didn't shoot it you shot it and i'm like one of them fucking shot it they both fired uh somebody needs to go get this thing and finally some uh um smart individual ran and jumped on a four-wheeler and ran and grabbed the bird and took it and disposed of it. And literally ten minutes later, two game wardens show up in two different vehicles and start spot-checking everybody on the field. Just an idiot. You think they would have seen the hawk on the ground?

I just sent my bird, Samson, over here to scout. Haven't got him back, though. Oh, no. He's got the falcon glove everywhere. He's blowing his falcon whistle. Nothing. It's odd.

He never does this. What's your bird look like? About this big, full of holes? Well, the fear is that somebody tells, right? The fear is that someone says, hey hey they just shot a hawk over there it's laying in the field right over there it was one of those two guys over there you know that happens a lot people just tell on you

and I don't mean me but like that's how people get in trouble with this sort of thing is they're bragging about their exploits of poaching animals and then someone just fucking turns them in um that happens a lot we were always very afraid of the game warden growing up because it's like oh i shot 13 doves instead of 12 uh better do something about this because you know the the game warden in our area didn't like us in particular and he checked us every single day

um and like he would he would he would lurk in the areas that i hunted in and when he heard a shot fired he would drive toward the gunshot and look for you so he could make sure that you're putting that deer on your tag. It was a real motherfucker. Yeah, Jesus, settle down. Like, if deer were in any way threatened, and there weren't enough of those rats,

those giant rats running around, which is what they are, they're a huge problem here. The ticks that they carry have Lyme disease, or the ticks that they have carry Lyme disease, I guess what they are. They're a huge problem here. The ticks that they carry have Lyme disease, or the ticks that they have carry Lyme disease, I guess I should say. And that's serious. I didn't know how bad Lyme disease was, but you could get bitten by a deer tick once

and get Lyme disease and be allergic to red meat for the rest of your life. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's no joke. Woody would just kill himself. Maybe, well, that's it. I thought they could cure Lyme disease now. I think they can treat it.

Chicken and fish is not a cure for Lyme disease. No, it's not. I know there's a UFC fighter who had Lyme disease recently. He actually fought Joe Lozon twice. I think sometimes it doesn't. Because the guy that I was listening to talk about, he's like, yeah, I think sometimes it doesn't. Because the guy that I was listening to talk about, he's like, yeah, I got it eight years ago.

Haven't had any problems in three years. But you never know. That sucks. I get ticks a lot. I feel like I just do shit that gets you ticks. I used to get a lot as a kid because I was out at my grandparents' property romping around the woods, and you'd always come in and, like, have to check your head, and there would always be a few just hidden in there.

Sometimes you'd miss one, and it would be like I'd be going to school, like, I don't know, a Wednesday after a weekend, I went to my grandparents' house, and I'm, like, I don't know, 11 or 12, and I just, like, will check my nutsack, and there's just a big fucking almost full tick. And it's the disturbing parts of that. Not like hanging off your ball sack. Like in one of the crevices. One of the niches where you're just like, oh, that's so upsetting, but also gross because you know that it's been with you the whole time. This didn't just jump on.

This has been a passenger. I found a tiny, tiny tick on my nutsack like 10 days ago. Like this is still the life I lead. And I was like, I don't know why I was looking at it, but I was checking it out. And like, is that a freckle? Or like, what do we got here? I take it off, and sure enough, like that's a tick, and it's a tiny one, which are the kind that I think are more likely to hold Lyme disease.

I'm like, well, great. Now that's a thing. You know? Like, I don't know. Like, does it make you a dirty person or something? Like, how do you avoid ticks other than, like, live an indoor life? You're getting them outside. So they're crawling up your pants, like, all the way to the top and stopping there.

Pants. Aren't you adorable? We're getting to the root of your problem. Yeah, we are, right? You don't wear pants it was 98 out uh-huh yeah i don't wear long pants when it's 98 out i wear shorts well the ticks like that they find it provides easy access to your testicles apparently um can't argue with the facts. Yeah, I wear my jeans. I don't know if it would matter. I think, like, it sounds like you're

in, like, brush or tall grass or something. Tall grass. It was an airfield, right? So it's just tall grass that we got. Ah, yeah, that makes sense. You ever get chiggers? No. Oh, my God. I've gotten chiggers so bad. Chiggers bore into your skin and, like, leave this little leave this little Arab hole breather out

and they just itch. And you get rid of them by... What I've always done is put nail polish on them because it clogs up their little breathing apparatus and they just fucking die in your skin and you scratch them off. Nail polish remover. What happens if you don't do it?

Do they eventually leave on their own? I don't know. Eventually they die by suffocating or the hole closes up or something. I think that's what it is. But they itch for a while if you don't do anything about them. They suck.

I used to get those at my grandparents' place constantly. And it's just a whole legs worth of tiny little smaller than a mosquito bite dots that itch horribly and it's small is it bad little cheese and ivy itching yeah I don't know I don't know if I'm allergic to it because I mean I was with friends all the time goofing off in the woods and it like sometimes a friend would get poison ivy

and I just maybe I just lucked out but I never got I the first time i met someone who wasn't allergic to poison ivy i didn't know that was a thing i was old like 30 something and and i'm like he's like oh it's not allergic to poison ivy it doesn't affect me and it was like he had a superpower because like i'm i think now as an adult i'm like a regular person like i get poison iv ivy, but it's whatever. As a child, I got it super bad, crazy bad. And one of the ways you can know if you're really susceptible to it is like, do you get poison ivy from eating cashews? Because they're in the same family. So if you're mega sensitive to poison ivy,

then cashews can affect you, and they did to me, of course. I would get poison ivy, and I swear, it just blew in the wind at me. Like I was hardly in the woods at all. I'd get poison ivy in and I swear it just blew in the wind at me. I was hardly in the woods at all. I'd get poison ivy in areas like my balls that were covered. How did that happen? Got it on your hand and you scratched. Probably.

But I don't know. I had it. My arm would swell up like Popeye's forearm. And I would go to a doctor to get steroids. It would all get black and blue and everything i i've missed school because of poison ivy i got poison ivy bad and uh i'm not a fan it doesn't sound like it well i uh i try to avoid the the ticks and the chiggers um i remember when when we were uh on that first survival trip in north Carolina, I had a few ticks. We were just laying on the ground, so it figures.

That'll happen. But, yeah, I've gotten chiggers always from, like, fields with tall grass and standing in tall grass. And, like, they really itch. They usually get between all my shins and, like, kind of around my ankles in that area. Yeah, those suck. Is anyone not susceptible to chiggers? Because I swear I've spent a lot of time outdoors and I... I can't imagine that anyone would be not susceptible because it's an insect, I think, that crawls up your leg and then bores into your skin.

Do they just find me unattractive, chiggers? Perhaps. That might be it. Boys, this one sucks. It went sour. I think he drinks pickle juice. That's so gross that you drink that pickle. We should talk about that on PKA because I feel like it would be funny if you were like, oh, yeah, I drink pickle juice and then I chew up the seeds. And Chew Nice was like, ah! Chew up the seeds!

As he's like drinking his wood glue. Yeah. I would like to see that, because that is that sounds like a challenge to me, to have to drink pickle juice and chew up little seeds and bits of remnant pickle, shards of pickle, if you will. If you think of it a different way,

like, pickle juice is the magic elixir that makes bread and butter pickles bread and butter pickles. That's salt and water and vinegar, right? These are my favorite things. Just a lot of vinegar. A lot of nitrates. Yeah, I'm sure. Look, I'm not arguing that it's good for you. Don't get me wrong. Look, I'm not arguing that it's good for you.

Don't get me wrong. This is a thing that I drink maybe like twice a year as a sin that I commit, but a dietary sin. I got some work to do. It's a hot day, and you crack open a cold can of pickles, and it's just like running down your neck. It's more like, fuck it. You know, I want a snack right now and I got like some time allotted.

Actually, I'll tell you, I watched Independence Day 2, that movie. It's like somehow, I was interested in that movie. I didn't catch it in the theater and I'm like, I'm going to watch it right now. I'm just going to shut down the world, forget any work or responsibilities.

I'm going to enjoy this movie and while you might like your popcorn I like bread and butter pickles so I've got the jar and a fork and I go and is it as it starts getting toward the end like that's what I'm like getting like oh yeah yeah yeah yeah because I don't drink it I I maintain discipline I don't drink the juice until the pickles are all gone. So I'm like, oh, there's only like four more of these fucking pickles before I get to that sweet elixir at the bottom of it. And then it's like, yeah, the pickles are gone. So then there's still like seeds and like little baby pickles and shit left in there. So you stir it up and make a little tornado

in the bottle in the jar and then you drink the tornado of It's the last of your creatine. But instead it's pickle remnants. And that is disgusting. It is astounding to me that you're like oh Bud Light, gross!

And then you're drinking like half gallons of pickle juice as a treat like i there's no way that those beers like a bud light tastes as bad as pickle you couldn't pay me to drink pickle juice that sounds horrible i can take a sip i just see what i find weird here isn't that you drink pickle juice because you're a sip like i i'm familiar with i like pickles i don't like bread and butter i like some people take pickles. Some people take the juice and spritz it on their sandwich. Sandwich. Yeah.

Yeah, that's okay, too. But you're drinking this stuff like a beverage. You're drinking like six ounces of this stuff and chewing the seeds. So it's a little... It's got to be more than that. I mean, Jeremy with his pickle shots. That should be your next drink of choice. You get the shot of pickle juice and the shot of booze, and you boom, boom.

I had some of... I was just about to bring that up because I had a couple of those... It was probably in the last three months that I was at, like, a cookout, and they had pickle backs or pickle shots, whatever you call them, and it's just a shot with half Jameson,

half pickle juice, and everyone was raving about how good it was, and I tried a couple and really it was more of a surprise of like this is not as wildly disgusting as i thought it would be because the the i guess trade-off is that okay if there were no pickle juice in here it would just be full of jameson which i'm not a huge jameson fan i don't think that tastes great jameson and jack daniels are two liquors that everybody seems to really have a hard-on for, and I've never enjoyed either one.

Jameson's better than Jack. Jameson's definitely better than Jack. Vodka? Vodka's terrible. And Jägermeister is awful. Oh, no, that's where you're wrong. See, Jäger, if I had a bottle of Jäger right here, I could sip on it like like it's any

like coffee or something like liquor I'll say this yeah I I've heard that and I and I get where they're coming from I drank Jaeger they told me it's just like black licorice I thought I don't really like black licorice but it's better than alcohol and uh and I drink it and I'm like it's like vodka ish like it has it has the alcohol in it with a black licorice sort of aftertaste. I don't know. I really like it with Red Bull. Do a Jaeger bomb, as the kids call it. I feel like I'm almost too old to do a Jaeger bomb.

Almost. Red Bull is great at covering up flavors because it's such a sweet and and tart sugary carbonated drink. So you can mix it with anything, like Red Bull and vodka, Red Bull and Jägermeister. Like it's going to do a lot of masking. I want to do two alcohols that lived up to the hype. One, like peach schnapps or some different schnapps. It's like, oh, yeah.

This, I mean, you still get that alcohol kind of nastiness to it, but it is actually masked while still being heavy in alcohol. It's easy to make a really weak, like, strawberry daiquiri and be like, oh, it's just like a, you know, Frosty from Wendy's or something. Yeah. Yeah, because there's no alcohol in it. No, schnapps, actually heavy in alcohol and whatever. But what's better still is some of these magicians that can make the moonshine.

Like an apple pie moonshine or a peach moonshine. You can make it. I've never made it. I'm sure it could be taught. That seems like the kind of thing you'd have fun doing. Dude, I have a paramotor friend. I won't say his name because I don't... I think it's legal if you just make it for yourself.

Yeah, you just can't sell it. You can't sell it. So sometimes he brings it and gives it away. And that's the truth of it. I'm not just covering it. He sometimes gives it away. And like after our first flight, there was going to be this like, you know,

bar trip celebration. And he's like, I brought something special. And that's when I was first introduced to his moonshine it's magic you could drink he has it in like a mason jar you could drink the whole mason jar and it's as strong as vodka like i don't know about that see i'm listening i don't believe that it's as strong as vodka i i would like to do some some testing on this stuff because my experience with with moonshine is this. There's like two kinds. I think they call it a clear. You know, there's always a southern accent involved,

so it's kind of hard to tell exactly what these were. It has to clear right there. It has to clear. And I think usually what they mean is like, this is like as strong as we could make it. Like this stuff is going to burn your ears when you drink it, kind of alcohol. And then there's like the candied ones that are like peach pie or apple pie or something and all the ones

that i have gotten of that i can pour like a juice glass of that stuff and drink the whole juice glass of and i'll get wasted but it's not like drinking a juice glass of vodka you know it's not like gonna i'm not gonna be vomiting so i might have stuff like what you're describing woody at uh a couple of like the liquor stores here where it's like the mason jar clearly it's like mass produced but it still has like in the mason jar and it has like some fruit or whatever is in there sitting in there and it'll be like you know uh plum pie or peach cobbler or whatever and those are usually like 40 proof so like 20 alcohol so way more than beer or wine tried it because i think i have my local gas station i didn't i thought it was too sweet

terrible and a little bit syrupy i didn't care for it yeah that stuff's terrible i i just want to say i might be off target in saying it's as strong as vodka but i will say this it's curiously strong compared to how good it tastes and it's's easy, if not warned, to drink too much of it because you can drink the whole jar and find yourself sick. I mean, imagine if wine tasted like Sprite. You'd be like, oh, yeah, yeah, this is my fourth Sprite today. You'd be shit-faced. You've had four glasses of wine.

Yeah, and you'd be drinking way more because you'd be like, man, I really like this wine. It actually tastes good. It's sweet and carbonated. Not gross like wine. It actually tastes good. It's sweet and carbonated. Not gross. Yeah. Yeah, wine I never got into. And I try it again every now and then. It seems like

every three, five years I'm in some situation where they're like, oh, you just don't appreciate good wine. Like, this wine here is fantastic. This is super, oh my my god this will blow your mind like all right like maybe i'll find out what this whole wine thing's about and then i drink it and it's like ah i remember it's just about the same fucking thing it was before i think it takes i i

the way that i would get into wine is if i was like i don't know if i was dating somebody or going on dates with somebody who drank it a lot. And like, you know, three or four nights a week for a couple of weeks straight, we were having a bottle of wine. Then I would definitely be like, Oh yeah, it tastes good. Oh, it's delicious.

Uh, it's just an acquired taste. I know it is because I used to think it was tasty. I used to be like, you know, wanting another bottle of red wine. And then when red wine made me sick, I needed a white wine.

And then when white wine made me sick, I was like, no more alcohol ever. I, yeah, I, I can like, so I went into it and it's like, okay, so wine has a really complex taste, right? So when you drink it, try to appreciate like all the shit that's going on in your mouth, the tannins, the barrel it came from, the this, the that. Is it stemmy, the great? The oak. Yeah, like try to appreciate how complex this taste is

and i drink it and i don't appreciate it at all i'm just like i don't like this taste i can uh i didn't taste a little buttery with scotch i can do that we're like but the thing is like scotch is usually about like 80 proof so like as strong as vodka and so like the strength of the liquor means that i can't just pour like i've got glasses over there for like scotch and shit like it's not a big glass like you pour a small amount and then you take sips like with wine it doesn't force you to drink it slowly enough and i don't like it enough so like i'll have some in my glass and it'll be like a red at my dad's house or something and i'll like take a drink and i'll see like you don't have that much more to go you could just get this done right now

like all right i just get all right you want another one no no no you really complimented the steak or whatever you wanted it to do like it's just reds that i really don't like very much like and i know that it's it's not because they're gross it's just because i haven't put in the time to learn to appreciate all the subtleties of it are you sure it's not because i know there are a lot of subtleties i just don't really taste the dessert wine once that was a red and i really liked it yeah like we would we would i remember we ate it with dessert and we had some sort of chocolate pie or something and i was like this is really tasty like i i want another like we should get two bottles of this it was good

so I can go either way but I just don't drink on my own and like I don't know anybody in my life that's like close to me that really drinks or should drink like I know some girls who would probably like to drink but it's like you're not allowed anymore because you become emotionally

unstable no booze for you and no crack for me for the same reason you see how that works if i do crack i might get crazy and burn you with a cigarette lighter you do you do alcohol you get a similar reaction so no booze for you um so so there's just not a lot of alcohol drinking going on in my daily life i've got booze here um but i just don't drink it i i wouldn't even know if we have booze. I bet we do, I'm sure. Sometimes people give it to us, and then like 10 years

later we still have it. Oh, I have it from, we had a wine sponsor. Oh yeah, you still got that. Yeah, yeah. Probably. Club W. Club W, yeah, yeah. I think it's a bottle of champagne upstairs and a couple bottles of wine. I like that. I like that because I really have a preference

for carbonated beverages. And so anything that's carbonated, I like a lot more. So champagne is way above wine for me. And it feels like you're celebrating. Yeah, I think champagne's one of those ones where it's not better after time, right? I think it gets more bitter and less sweet. I'm not sure.

But I drink champagne so fucking rarely that for me it still feels like it still tastes good like i like it i just think of it as like carbonated sweet wine which i guess is what it is yeah it's like alcoholic sprite to me or alcoholic ginger ale or something it's it's pretty tasty those dessert wines are good though like we've been listen i've gone to nicer restaurants where like afterward it's like oh you want a dessert wine and then you have some like this pink dessert wine and you're like man this is this is great like this tastes really good and then like you look at the bottle and you see the alcohol content and it's like half of what a regular bottle of wine is and

you're like aha if i found the variable like you know what we haven't talked about? Six percent. Topic change. I just got excited. The whole terrorist attack thing has been a gun lover's dream. So they attacked us with plumbing supplies and with a knife, right?

What did you say? And a pressure cooker. And a pressure cooker, right? So the fuck is knife, right? What did you say? And a pressure cooker. And a pressure cooker, right? So the fuck is that, right? But plumbing supplies, a pressure cooker, and a knife. And in the Minnesota one, I think in particular, the knife-wielding attacker was taken down by a concealed carry guy. I think he was an off-duty cop.

And he trains tactical stuff. It's almost, while he's a cop it's he's also like a gun enthusiast who you know he owns i think that's what he does now i think he's a retired cop and owns like a training center or definitely a shooting range and he like teaches classes on how to do that kind of shooting like yeah you couldn't have fucked with the war more right a worst guy you can't imagine a worse guy to mess with. I guess maybe I know one or two who are world championship speed shooters,

but he is one in 5,000 as far as how good he is at not just shooting a piece of paper, but shooting a gun in a mall at a bad guy. He's the guy you want. Do you think he was thinking at the time, like, oh my God, it's happening? Yes. It's finally happening. Do you think he was thinking at the time like, oh my god, it's happening. Yes.

It's finally happening. Do you think he was like rehearsing what he was going to say to the media as he was pulling it out? Well, it wasn't really that hard considering all the training that I put into this. Bam. I really don't need your thanks. I'm just being an American citizen. In my head, I don't know what's true. But like I picture that – because the knife guy stabbed like nine people, right?

So I imagine there's like a bunch of people screaming okay eight or nine maybe it was a i don't know the bunch of people screaming a bunch of other people like running away and he's like headed upstream through a crowd of people like oh my fucking yes yes make room yeah and he finally like oh yeah a knife wielder you brought a knife to a gunfight you fool and then he'll and uh and just shoot him like eight or ten times don't let that guy leave yet he shot him like six times or something like that although there was that other guy that got shot so i get the two muddled up a bit we yeah we had a couple terrorists i was off reddit and like not on the internet for a day or two, and it was like there was a couple of

two or three terrorist attacks. That was pretty interesting. More pressure cooker bombs in New York. Of course, they forgot about the fact that New Yorkers will steal your shit, you leave it on the street. So people are like, that's some nice luggage there. They open it up, and there's a pressure cooker inside. And they're like, what the fuck is this? Steal the luggage and leave the pressure cooker

sitting there. So thus it loses its camouflage, and people reported it. department of homeless security ah you should save that one ah you blew that one too early i think i saw somebody tweet that i'm not taking credit that was pretty clever though but um i saw someone tweeted uh it was some news anchor i don't remember exactly what station it was for but he was like uh we are very very very lucky that the shooter decided to try and use explosives instead of using a gun and it was like that is why are they describing him as a shooter in this scenario the attacker the terrorist whatever the guy said. Probably an inside terrorist. That's just wildly

uninformed. Like, you have to be a real idiot to believe that, or someone who has no qualms with lying to people and misleading them. Like, that's... Bombs are way worse. Like, I'm sorry, Timothy McVeigh? Like, has anybody even come close? Has anybody come

close, aside from 9-11, which once again wasn't guns, to matching Timothy McVeigh? Like, a couple hundred people died at the Oklahoma City bombing. I think it was 200 plus, right? Right around there? No, you're saying it rings a bell. Yeah, I think it's like, but

the point is, like, bombs are so much more devastating than guns. And it's not that hard to make a bomb. I've never tried, but I assume that, you know, obviously people are figuring this shit out. ISIS is out there saying, hey, go to Sears and buy

this, and then go to Home Depot and buy this, and then stop on over by Lowe's and make sure you get it at Ace Hardware so they don't track. They give you tips for that kind of shit. 168 confirmed deaths and an additional possible death like i don't know one possible they never found what was left of that other guy 680 non-fatal injuries okay so it's it's not even in the same ballpark as any of our attacks it's they're not even playing

the same sport that was a lot of ammonium nitrate yeah i'm, so we had 49 in Orlando, but 49 is just a lot less than 168. Yeah, it doesn't diminish any of the issues or the tragedies. It just points out the fact that, wow, you're a really disingenuous piece of shit. If your first response at this is, well, you know, we be thankful that that he didn't use guns and that he decided to try and use a bomb would you be saying that same thing if they made the bomb correctly or if those homeless people those vagabonds didn't stumble upon it and it actually went off at the right time and it killed a lot of people like would you be saying that same thing of course not of course you'd be saying the same thing because it would have been more devastating

than i don't know i'm not an expert and i don't I don't know much about the bombs, but I'm guessing it would have been successful, with air quotes, on the level of that Boston bombing. Yeah, I'm sure. It depends if you've got a crowd. That was a super condensed, packed crowd. This was a subway, right? I don't know where it was. But I'm just saying, the marathon thing, that crowd,

it was like they're lining the road or whatever and like they're shoulder to shoulder really packed in there but yeah an environment like that is what i guess what they're looking for um but yeah i would much much uh much more fear for a bomb than a gun because well there's obvious reasons anyone who says that says that's an idiot or they're lying to you like you said yeah but yeah lots of lots of crazy stuff in the news this week lots of bad people out there doing their thing uh i can't it can only be good for donald trump you know that it's true he is the law and order candidate after all every time chis posts like uh uh anything that's um that that's uh um like like oh this terrorist attack happened or they're shooting

there here there and i'm just like law and order candidate so much i didn't realize like i guess i just didn't read the tone very carefully and choose his message i didn't realize that he was getting like upset or bothered but as i come back i'm like oh sometimes actually yes he is mad i uh i tend to be i mean maybe i am intentionally tone deaf like in text but uh because i don't like to read tone in the text i i prefer people can get it too extreme or whatever but i came back and reread a few and i'm like oh yeah he's upset he's upset you know when someone's like cursing in text there's a special kind of like deliberateness to it and uh yeah he's mad yeah yeah i don't i don't i don't like discussing political things with chiz on the internet because he gets mean and angry and uses dirty dirty words your virgin ears

conversation with the man about politics. Without it, like, you know, regressing into a na-na-na-na-boo-boo kind of fight and calling each other peaches. You wouldn't like arguing with my wife. There's two problems with it. One, she is very, very well informed, which just is a pain in the ass. Like, every time I mention, like, you mention, but this happened or that or whatever, I tend to be contrarian. I don't know why when I'm with her, I'm practically pro-Trump.

She always has every detail and every counter-argument, and that's dreadful. Then the other part of it is, she just, I don't know, isn't happy with you for not being pro-Hillary. Don't you see? You're off target on this, and it's something we've got to fix in you.

How could anybody pick a turd sandwich over a douche? Pretty much exactly. Yeah. Really, my honest belief, I've been honest for a while now. I guess if I had to pick now i'd pick hillary but she's really crooked and if it wasn't for jackie would you still pick hillary or is that kind of the thing you know one of the issues i have with trump now is his vp so i believe that trump is going to be a bit of a hands-off president which doesn't mean bad right people don't get it be a bit of a hands-off president, which doesn't mean bad,

right? People don't get it confused. Reagan was a hands-off president. He was pretty effective. Bush Jr. was a hands-off president. I'm not sure about his father. And,

you know, they let the VP do a lot, right? Cheney did a lot. It doesn't mean bad. It just means they delegate more. And when you look into shit is it pence is that his vp yeah pence yeah um he's dreadful like he's super religious and he inserts his uh

like his his beliefs into government he's not really a pro he's not a secular guy he likes church and state to be mixed and he'll take take his state attorneys and send them to other states to weigh in on their issues. And I could give you the article, but it really turned me off from his VP. And that was a problem. Am I mixing up hints? What's Hillary's VP name? Kane. Oh, bad man.

Tim Kane. Maybe I had it right all along. I'm looking forward to the debates they're coming up soon uh we'll see if hillary can can stand for that long well hopefully trump doesn't completely blow it yeah we'll see on the debate dude i could see like i have no idea where that's headed right i can totally see trump nailing like the best zingers in presidential debate history which seems to be how they grade them right and just smashing it and i can also see trump you know coming up empty uh and looking uninformed compared to hillary i think he's either going to go in the way like more calm reserved kind of trying to look more leader like and play the politician part and he'll do well or he'll get flustered early and resort to

crazy don where it's nothing but ridiculous zingers and he'll and everybody on the alt right will think he won and everyone else will be like uh yeah no because that really didn't look very becoming of our leader that looked like a child you know getting getting pissy so i don't know what he's gonna end up doing it just depends the level of professionalism he's capable of carrying out interesting so you think being unprofessional hurts him i don't know i don't know yeah because people are acting they act like the alt-right is this huge group of people when really it's a minority of people who are very loud on the internet like most people who are voting for him are still just regular republicans who don't like the idea of you know crazy racist alt-right people getting their way and so it's just like a

feedback loop of oh trump's doing great you know, maga! But really, nobody's jumping on the train. A lot of Trump supporters are really Hillary anti-supporters, which I can see. They're not crazy. That's what I would put myself in. I dislike Hillary more than I dislike Trump. I think Trump's going to win, because I don't think Hillary's voters

are passionate about her. I don't think there's anyone passionate about her. I don't think she's going to about her. I don't think she's going to get the black vote. I bet Trump comes close in the black vote. I bet Trump gets like 14% and she gets like 30% and then the rest don't vote. You know what I mean? I think something like that's going to happen. I think there's going to be terrible voter turnout for Hillary because I just can't understand people getting passionate about her and I really can't understand the kind of I can't see liberals getting passionate about voting against Trump enough to go vote I don't know maybe that's just me in this and I'm

fooling myself but that's just how it feels I think a lot of people will go out there just to vote against Trump but I think that will be you know counteracted by the fact that, unlike Obama, there's not a ton of people hugely passionate about going out and having their voice heard. Hillary has had potentially the easiest run to the presidency of

all time. It should have been. Hey, can you beat this 74-year-old socialist in the primary? Apparently I can kind of eke it out if I'm really, really been. Hey, can you beat this 74-year-old socialist in the primary? Ah, apparently I can kind of eke it out if I'm really, really shady. Hey, great news, Hillary. You're not even running against a real politician. It's Donald Trump, the guy who donated to you.

Oh, that's awesome. That's great. Oh, I'm like tied with him now? I'm barely beating Donald the Apprentice Trump, a guy who wrestled on WWE as a stunt in the last, like, 10 years. That guy, like, she is fucking bad at this. A grounded pound. Do you guys go to FiveThirtyEight very much?

Yeah, I follow him on Twitter. I go there and kind of look around and see. That's my number one site that I go to because I think they got every state right for the last two elections. It's 100 out of 100 states. That's pretty amazing. And I thought that with the Hillary medical collapse, like kind of in the rearview mirror now fading off, that we'd start to see it revert to where it was two weeks ago. And that is not the case. Trump is just continuing to gain on Hillary.

And he's doing better in their polls plus thing. Like what they do is they take the polls and then they modify them a little bit. One of the things they include is momentum. So Trump, like even if the polls model says it's 60-40, they have it like 55 45 um because trump has momentum so uh it's i don't know i thought it was interesting because the like the donald subreddit goes nuts on how like you know what a cucky is and all that but as it is now 538 is benefiting donald more than the actual poll numbers are because his with a little twist they put on it helps him well that was just a thing for a lot of those like

very intense donald supporters for a while where it was like oh these polls they don't even matter it's all just a part of the machine and even if hillary was losing 99 to 1 they'd still report 60 40 and then as soon as that swings they kind of either have to maintain that position of it still doesn't matter or basically admit well yeah we were kind of just having a sour grape situation where we were pissy that we weren't winning like so there's no winning in that situation when you've been proven to be incorrect because there's like nate silver the guy who runs 538 i think that's him um that's right he he has a vested interest and i don't read like the opinion stuff on there i just look at like the polls and like his predictions that dude has a vested interest in getting this right like that is his career yeah he like unless like i don't know if hillary clinton

like is like you know i'll give you 20 million dollars if you really make this work for me maybe then but i really think that this dude is trying 100 to just get this right like that that's just what i think that's his job and he's trying to do it that's his job security if he if it comes out that oh it looks like 538 was actually wildly off everywhere, all that credibility out the door. Those past elections don't matter because now the credibility is there. They have this winding path to 270 votes. And if you go back like a month,

Hillary's blue path was way past the 270 into Trump territory. Now it's literally one more state like i just watched the pink and the red like of trump's march over and over um and now all he needs is new hampshire if trump picks up new hampshire and everything goes as the polls say trump is the next president or virginia i think live for your diet or colorado yeah okay so uh new hampshire i picked because it's the state that's the closest colorado pennsylvania michigan wisconsin and virginia you know like any of those would do it too but that also you know assumes that all the states that are barely trumps go trump's way too yeah Yeah, he's going to win by much bigger margins than that.

No. I still do not think he's going to win the election. No, he's not going to win. Hillary has every establishment person on the planet on her side. Everyone is

pulling for Hillary. The Bushes are pulling for her. Yeah, there was like i really don't think old bush's vote is going to carry a ton of weight since a lot of the reason that people i was reading an article about this today a lot of the reason that people are voting for trump or at least a good group of people is they feel like he's not in that class of political gurus he's not in that like upper echelon of political people rubbing shoulders in the White House. So some people might see that and be like, yeah, good. We don't want your brand

of conservatism back. I'm just saying what people may construe that as, but maybe it will impact votes. I have no idea. Forgive the tinfoil hat stuff that's about to come out of me, but let's say you buy refs for a basketball game, right? If two semi-closed teams play, buying the refs work.

If you buy the refs, your high school team cannot beat the Clippers, right? They just can't do that much for you. I feel like there's enough fucking crooked people out there that will turn a close race into a Hillary victory. that will turn a close race into a Hillary victory. Trump needs to slam the door on this thing, or there's going to be some voting irregularities that put Clinton in the White House. I mean, all it would take would be for someone to literally slam a door on Hillary,

and she'd be out anyway. She's so frail and fragile that we're just a stiff wind away or a car door getting slammed or something like that from her being out of this thing anyway. Yeah, she's clearly in very bad health, and so this could at any time crumble down. You don't need a sniper's bullet.

Great health. I saw her kiss that little girl. She looked lively and ginger. I want to CGI it so that you can see the life drain out of the little girl's face. And her skin turns to paper and then just blows away in the wind. And then it shows Hillary younger, revitalized.

Yes! Yes! Hillary Clinton is now going to be the youngest president and a woman. Just sucking the life from this nine-year-old girl. Yeah, I think Trump is going to lose, I think Trump is going to lose. I think Trump's going to lose, and it might be crooked, it might not. Yeah, Hillary won the primaries crooked shit, right? Like, a handful of DNC staffers had to resign in disgrace. You know, they're sending emails about manipulating.

And then the big ones get rehired. Yeah. Immediately. Yeah, thanks for dying on that hill for me we got a job for you like that's yeah she's so clearly crooked manipulative cunty whatever you want to say trump she is she's going to twist it somehow and it's not that i don't think trump is morally above rigging an election because Cause I don't, I just don't, he does not have the means to do it. Hillary has the means she has. She knows everybody and everybody wants her in like the media wants her in the

fellow politicians, all the Democrats want her in there's, you know, there's Republicans for Hillary, but there's no Democrats for Trump. Like it's, that's just the way it is. Trump is not some moral bastion of,

you know, ethics and freedom, but he also doesn't have the capacity to do that at all. The thing I learned about today, so Trump lost a lawsuit, and as part of the payment he had to donate some money to charity. So what he did is he had, apparently this is a charitable foundation, a Trump foundation, and rather than pay the charity with his own money, he just took it from the charitable trust and used other people's money to settle that

lawsuit. Yeah, I don't doubt it. He's not a good guy. See, it's ideas like that that's going to get this country out of debt. Alright? Here's a man, the authorities come to him and say, you owe some money, you did wrong and he says oh did i

well someone else will pay for that watch this and he moves a few things around all of a sudden some other people pay for it that's what we need on a national scale we need to be affecting global commerce with that kind of mindset you know like mexico pay for the fine. So the deal with Iran, and I probably have some detail wrong, but it has occurred to me, the first thing we did is we gave them a lot of money. And then we're going to see if they continue to behave. And I'm like, why didn't we space that payment out? Why didn't we be like, all right, tell you what, you need to behave for the next 12 years. We're going to give you one twelfth of the money every year for the next 12 years.

Why'd they get it up front? Why are they still behaving? Like, they got the money. Well, they're not behaving. Are they, like, reliably? Like, what do you know that I haven't heard about? Oh, just about Iran violating... What was...

Is it the nuclear thing you're talking about? The non-proliferation of nuclear weapons? Yeah, I think there's more to... Maybe I have to do more than just that. It's so complicated. I heard Sean Hannity explain this thing for an hour and a half one time. And he went on and on about

how... Well, I'm sure you're well-informed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. And I said that. I prefaced it with that. But he was explaining that, like, you know, that it's more about the ballistic technology that they can continue to work on and that not working on the creation of the nuclear material wasn't even that big of a deal because, you know, you're basically giving them $180 million to work on the hard part of delivering a nuclear weapon to Israel, which is the ballistic program, the missile which carries a payload to a place. And that was his thoughts on the matter.

He's super, super duper pro-Israel, super anti-Iran, and super anti-Obama, though. Where are we going to be in 20 years when figuring out how to send a missile 1,000 miles is just on the internet and not a big deal? It's on the internet. I think there's a lot of technical stuff that has to be taken care of first, but I see what you're saying. Yeah, that's going to be a real fucking problem. In civilization, what happens when everybody gets to that tech is the missiles start crossing the fucking ground. when everybody gets to that tech is the missiles start crossing the fucking... Like, I know

as soon as I get to ballistic missile technology, because there's a ballistic missile leaving my capital and heading toward yours. So, who knows? What's probably going to happen is we're going to have some sort of... I know Israel has this thing, I think they call it David's Sling or something.

They've got a bunch of them like that. They're these anti-missile things. So they'll shoot those missiles in over the wall, and these things are launching countermeasures up at them and shooting them out of the air and shit. So I think the Israelis are pretty well protected with that, especially with the hundreds of millions of materiel and cash we give them. And then on our side, I'd like to believe we're in a similar situation,

a similar boat, plus we've got the Atlantic and the Pacific on either side. I think that we are in D.C. I'm almost certain that certain buildings are protected in D.C., like the White House and the Pentagon and such. Some ballistic missile, right? We're talking about it entering over a state, not really like a machine gun is going pop up over a building and like shoot a ballistic missile like some sort of uh anti-missile technology i think is currently implemented around dc and the pentagon but the thing is we're a big country like all they need to do is take out freedom one and we're really upset freedom one is the replacement to the twin towers isn't that

what it's called yeah but i think if we're talking about ballistic missiles, then we're not talking about losing a building, we're talking about losing a city. And, you know, they wouldn't shoot one. They might shoot one. I don't know. But anyway. Oh, and then North Korea has subs now.

That's a thing. They have subs that can shoot missiles, but they don't have subs that they can get within range of our cities, and they don't have missiles that can carry enough payload to matter. So maybe, maybe they could come. I guess in that scenario, the mission is to take out Freedom 1, is to get this North Korean attack sub within range of the building. But God, we're good at defending against that, I think.

I think we've got so many listening devices across the oceans, and our subs are so good. I wonder. For all I know, there's – oh, here's an interesting thing. So there's a Russian aircraft carrier, and I saw a picture of it, and I was like, damn, that thing looks futuristic and good. My image of the Russian army is frozen in the 80s, and I see their stuff now, and I'm like, dude, turns out they weren't sitting still all this time. The trouble is they don't have pilots that can land on an aircraft carrier. So I think they're literally bringing

an aircraft carrier to Syria right now with no planes on it. Huh. So it's a missile cruiser. A big one. Yeah, a big vulnerable ship. But big one. A big, vulnerable ship. Those things have lots of armaments. I just don't fear any...

At this point, I think that the next time there's going to be a big war that we actually should be worried about, it's going to be too late to matter anyway because everybody's just going to destroy each other. But I don't fear North Korea coming and doing anything to us. Maybe to our interests. They might blow up a city over there. Or they might take out a building over there somewhere.

Yeah, that's a big problem with North Korea and South Korea and the DMZ and then China on their side and us over here. That could be what kicks off World War III. But I'm not worried about the North Koreans coming and doing anything to us over here. Those fuckers. Yeah, not at all. I don't even believe in sarcasm. Call it a show? Yeah. Alright, PKN

episode 110.