Painkiller Already - PKN #142

Episode Date: May 12, 2017

It's PKN time baby!

We're live, Painkiller Nearly, episode 142. I got a first topic. How's everybody doing with their fitness? And let's be honest. Good, good. Always very sore. I've been doing a lot of push-ups, and I've been doing the kettlebells.

Maybe push-ups are a silly thing to do. I don't think they are. I think that push-ups get a bad rap as like- A lot of people do them. As like the most basic thing, and maybe some people just do nothing but push-ups and too much of them. They're all upper body or something like that. But I really like push-ups.

I like the soreness that I get from them, and I feel like it's usable strength. Like I try to crank out a lot of push-ups throughout the day. Like maybe it's not a lot. The thing with like people saying it's easy, like there's 500 different ways to do push-ups. If you're saying, oh, it's just too easy going like this, it's like, okay, then put your hand in a diamond and see how long you can do it. Or go twice as slow as you're currently going,

and suddenly it's like, oh, fuck, this is real hard. When I was in the best shape of my life, decline push-ups were a core part of it. We would just do, I don't want to exaggerate, 125, 150 decline push-ups. That's a lot. a core part of it. I don't want to exaggerate. 125, 150 decline push-ups. That's a lot.

Yeah, it is. Then I learned Herschel Walker does 1,000 a day, so it didn't seem cool anymore. Oh, one of the greatest athletes of all time did a bunch diddy. That's the problem with this modern era of humanity we're living in. Back in the Stone Age, the dude cranking out 150 decline Push-ups would have a herd of bitches. They'd be like oh, oh glug does

150 crunch crunch and he can count that high More impressive because it's mean you have surplus of calories to burn some sort of grand king of nutrition Now that would be like, you know how rappers go and make it rain? Back in the caveman days, the making it rain would be cranking out push-ups just to be vain. Just like, yeah, I don't need these calories. He would just start juggling rocks for no reason. Like, Ugla, aren't you a little worried about burning energy? Me no worry.

Exceptional hunter. How many push-ups are you doing? From starvation? No, I'm staying to it how many no go ahead um i do i do like 20 25 at a time and uh and then stop and then go about my day and then the next time i'm it's about all i can do um with that end of them, they're starting to get shaky. I remember if I'm not sore and I'm like, how many push-ups can I do? It's probably 40 to 50 maybe, I would hope. In a row? Yeah.

50 in a row, that's a lot, man. Yeah, that's a lot. I do 20 multiple times a day, so I feel like I can do 50. I haven't tried. Maybe that's a good idea, maybe to set a bar and then try to raise the bar every week with the number of push-ups. I think I could do 20, but I think if I did 12 or 15, it would be an appropriate workout. There's no sense in making myself handicapped the following day right now that's what that's what i was saying in that like how many could

i do right now um i don't know i'd be i'd be shaking around 14 because i've already done like 50 today probably uh you know when i woke up and the water was getting hot to brush my teeth i cranked out 10 there and do you put your hands flat when you do them yeah yeah i it's always even you know even young perfect woody uh i preferred knuckles down because it was just always a little easier on my whole thing i just i did them like fist to the ground that's how i never thought about that yeah i've never really done push-ups knuckles down maybe it's helps your wrist more sideways it's a different workout from what I understand. It's a slightly different muscle group.

Maybe it's doing something different to your arms maybe. I like to go wide and really feel it like around my pectoral muscles and that place that connects your arm to your core. I like to do really wide ones until my chest starts shrinking up and my shoulders get narrower than they're supposed to be. How's your kettlebell thing going? Good. I got my big one Monday, yesterday.

The big one came. It was packaged. How big is your big one? It's 45. Yeah, it's 45. I like the kettlebells. I've got a 15-pound one, too. And so I do lots of light stuff with it.

And then I do, like, the full kettlebell workout where I'm swinging those things around. And I almost hit the ceiling yesterday. So I was like, okay, move the workout downstairs with the high ceilings. That's good you're sticking with it. How many times a week are you doing it, the kettlebell? Every day. If I don't do something every day, then I really get out of the the i won't do then there will be two or three cold days or something like that seal you know yeah every day i every day i

try to do something that'll make me sore somewhere um but doing the kettlebells like every day whether i do like a long hour long workout is one thing um there's definitely been days where it was like 15 minutes with the kettlebells and then some push-ups and then go for a jog and that was it yeah I've been doing a pretty good job sticking to it and the diet like even my cheat shit on the weekend was mostly like all right I'll have two beers and a bunch of chicken wings and it's like all right as far as cheating stuff goes chicken wings aren't too bad wings. And it's like, all right, as far as cheating stuff goes, chicken wings aren't too bad. So, you know, it's good. I always feel better after cheat days when I know I didn't just go balls to the wall irresponsible

and was like, I got a cheesecake and, you know, a barrel of Cheez-Its and I ate the whole thing. Like, the next day I can be like, all right, you had like 200 calories of beer and probably a few too many wings, but that's protein, whatever. But as far as working out,'ve been doing like hour to an hour and a half mondays wednesdays and friday fridays i'm on the fourth week of that and i haven't missed one yet and so i'm doing good with that i wanted to do tuesdays and like thursdays as

well and the first time i tried that i realized like oh i'm not even close to good enough shape to do this every single day because i got like halfway into every workout and i was hitting like muscle exhaustion of like just not being able to do it and so yeah I'm at a point now where I want to finish out this fourth week and then I want to replace all the exercises I'm currently doing with 225s with 235s and instead of doing the one I'm continuing to do one arm with 35 I'm going to bump that up to 45 I think and get one of those. I'm really, really liking it and feeling healthier about it. I can tell I'm starting to like recomposite my body a little bit, even though it's new where I'm like, all right, my upper body's looking bigger. Like when I was working out more, I'm tapering more in the middle. And it's really just once you're in a good rhythm,

like I feel like I am for the most part. It's like you want to keep doing it. You know, you don't want to get sucked back into being unhealthy. I hope to join you. I'll give my honest report. I've run twice in the week. I aspire to make three times my baseline. So that's a fail. But oh, and those two runs have not really combined for any gains. Surprisingly, I haven't become much better at running because of the two runs. Run three, you're $6 million. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. That would be great, although it's not my expectation.

I have done other light exercise. I consider paramotoring more like activity. You do have to haul it around, and it's a heavy backpack. I'm not even messing with you at all. I consider the paramotoring definitely a workout. Just carrying that thing around, the running, the jogging, it's physical activity. They always have those charts,

like jogging does X amount of calories per hour. And then down there amongst some actual exercises will be things like dodgeball dodgeball or like skipping yeah or like double dutch and it's like oh yeah any physical activity at all where you're moving around and carrying stuff has got to be pretty fucking good so yeah so maybe it counts for something in my head it like in terms of exercise it ranks there with like sex like you know yeah you worked up a sweat that's on that chart is it yeah but yeah a good sex routine has never chiseled anybody as far as i know like yeah it's no you know it look it's better than surfing the web but it's not uh like one of the exercises

you really tired unless you're a rapist maybe so so anyway i i paramot. And it's also a lot of running. I paramotored. And a little jujitsu. Whatever that technique the rodeo guys use where they tie up a calf real quick. All of those things. I think I've had three flights this week and two runs. I don't know if you give the flights any credit. On the other hand, on diet, I have been doing better. I'm trying to do the keto thing, but I'm sort of learning.

I dove into it right away, and then I learned later. So I'm not an expert on it. But some of the very basics are like cutting carbs. That's a big deal. So the magic behind keto, I'm sure it will be debunked in five years. But basically, they rework your diet so that you burn more fat the more your your calories come from fat so um i have been pretty good about cutting out like the good sugar i mean i still get sugar from like fruits and vegetables and shit we know that the shitty

sugar yeah that's expected yeah yeah but um but you know as far as, like, I don't know, any jelly beans that may have crept into my diet. Ah, corn syrup. Yeah, or I love some juice. Cut that out. I love juice, too. I get the apple juice that's, like, you know, the just orange apple juice that used to have Keith or Sutherland's father. Donald Sutherland used to be their spokesman.

He's like, it's like simply orange because it's just oranges. But they've got an apple juice, and it gets that sediment at the bottom like cider does. It's opaque. You don't see through this juice. That's not juice. That's some sort of apple pre-cum. And when you shake my juice up, this cloud of sediment disperses throughout it. And even then, you're meant to look at it and go, ah, health.

But really, it's like, oh, this is basically soda. It's like ground up apples in there. Yeah, it's just a ton of sugar. Today was my cheat day. Keto gives you one cheat meal a week. If I understand it right, I'm still learning. So I went to my favorite Thai restaurant, and that was disappointing. Love Thai.

Yeah, so I had my first cheat meal on weekend. Yeah, so I've been pretty good on the diet. That's going to make the big difference for you. If your goal is mainly to lose weight, you can't run yourself into better shape. Eating is where it's at. I've got two thoughts. One, I feel like the exercise component changes your body composition, changes your wants and needs. Whereas diet, if diet without exercise just becomes a test of discipline and unhappiness.

Like that Scottish guy who just stopped eating for a year and lost 200 pounds. So I'm hoping that, you know, if I get into running and stuff, what I crave is better. My wife, she's been supportive, which is super helpful because she does both the cooking and buying of the food. And she's like, look, I got you these green beans. They're in the produce part of the fridge, and you can eat them like potato chips. And it's like, well, I really appreciate that. This is how people get unhappy.

Couldn't you have carrots? Because carrots seems like the way to go. I love baby carrots. They belong, baby carrots. But I'm going to try these. I haven't eaten them yet. They're not going to be good. Well, she...

They're not bad. Baby carrots are pretty good. They're surprisingly good. Well, better than you probably are guessing. She eats them herself and she'll offer me one, but I haven't really

had a bowl of string beans to kill a craving. Anyway, so I'm cleaning up my diet. I personally give myself a C minus or something on the exercise. I'd like to hit that three times a week. But see, the important thing is we all just talked about it, held each other accountable, and making sure... You guys aren't the only friends that I bullied into doing this.

A couple of my other friends who are doing keto, so I'm glad I thought of that again to bring it up to you. I'm not doing the keto thing. I'm still eating brown rice and carbs. I'm just trying to eat healthier. I'm only watching protein macros, trying to get 200 to 20 a day-ish grams. They're doing keto like what you're doing, hardcore, and they've lost weight quickly. They've been doing it for a month. One of them was probably about your weight, a little taller than you, but he's lost like 11 pounds in the last month. Very minimal activity too. He's not even running. He's just taking the diet pretty seriously. And he's saying that after like the first two weeks, he's like, yeah, I just kind of started craving different

things. Like I would just go like seven hours one day and be like man i didn't get hungry that whole time and then i would end up getting ravenous and just stuffing myself with tons of vegetables and chicken or lean meat and at the end of it i'd feel like i gorged myself but i'd check the nutrition it's like oh i'm actually you know the way they described it's like i feel like i'm eating the way i'm supposed to and i'm like well man that's also a very nice marketing really are you smashing like they're smashing zebra bones on the on the sahara like getting the marrow out when i hear eating the way i'm supposed to i'm like you mean you chew your food because that's how i'm supposed to eat but basically it was meant as an encouragement of they're already

seeing results pretty quick and you'll see it too my reason weighing was four pounds below the highest i've seen and uh i attribute that to likely bullshit like you can't just pick the highest weight ever and then like a morning weight and say look what i've done because weight fluctuates so when i lose 10 pounds i will know i i am – beyond any shadow of a doubt, that's not just daily fluctuations. That's an achievement. And then once you do it, once you're like, oh, I've knocked 15, 10 pounds, whatever it is, you're like, that is 35,000 free calories that I can consume now and do whatever I want with. I could eat like four or five Thanksgiving turkeys and yeah.

Four or five Thanksgiving. Actually, I mean, trying to get to 35,000 calories of turkey would be a feat. Unless it's fried. Harley made a living off that. Yes, he did. I hope he's set for life. All the people listening out there, I've been

noticing on the Pka reddit when i stop by people are being like fat shame me and i just think that's that's great it's excellent for people want to be a little bit shamed so they can get on the right path but even like the little comments i see when i was reading on the most recent pka people being like oh yeah i've been doing it for three weeks now lost seven pounds you know of course nobody likes it or cares but it's like all right fucking this guy like one of us listening i did one of the can i jump in on the fat shame thing my um so i was i had these vlogs from like whatever a week and a half ago or something and every so often somebody like woody looks fat woody looks bad and i have discovered i don't enjoy fat shaming I never asked for it I'd like I do it well on my own

so fuck you guys but next time you're thinking about I just don't want to go on that run you're going to think what about those internet assholes and you're going to be like you know what I'm not giving you something to critique me about because the only critique is going to be man those cabs look like they've seen a lot of pavement recently

good for you I hear where you're coming from and and there's probably some asshole out there thinking he's doing me a favor but yeah I didn't I didn't like it I was I'm already motivated I could see it I can see what you see dick other shaming is only useful if that person has already you know come to terms with full self-shame. It's like the Bible says, you know, faith without works is dead. So you need that self-shame, that faith in yourself that you will fail without constant shame. If you're like a real body acceptance person and someone else shames you, then that probably doesn't work at all.

No, it probably wouldn't. doesn't work at all no probably wouldn't or it would feed into their desire that people not like the way they look so they can justify not changing and file it under people being jealous or not liking some other aspect of their personality as far because those like big body shaming people like as big and as fat and as ugly as many of them are it's always like goddamn like you being this fat is not your main problem. You're very unpleasant. Yeah. Yeah. People don't like you because you're rude and not likable. I think I was watching a TV show and they came up with the line, you know, for someone who looks like you do, I'm surprised you don't do more to compensate with your personality. And that's these people.

Like, oh, my gosh, you have nothing going on you are ugly to look at and ugly to talk to yikes yeah that's a real a real thing i always while ago sorry i was gonna say one of our patrons in our hangout uh the other day he's lost 30 pounds um and uh he said he had like he i think he said he had 50 more to go or something like that he's got a ways to go but he's 30 pounds in. That's a big deal. That's a lot of weight to lose. I would be very proud of myself if I had lost 30 pounds. 30 pounds from here,

I would be pretty good. It might even be a target weight. Well, you could always amputate an arm. You could. It would have to be like a calf. Ah. Why don't you just spot treat your fat like that guy in

7 where they just hand him a knife in his law office and just make him cut a pound of fat off his stomach a pound of flesh 5 pounds of flesh 7 is a fucked movie that is a fucked movie but to Woody's point

it is wrong to think of it like that but when you see someone who's like deformed or fat or very ugly your first thought is always like they're probably pretty nice you know because they probably had to be pretty nice to to survive you know and not be mocked into ridicule or into you know just miserable they're still here they're still here you must have some friends and be nice but then when you meet someone who's like hideous and they're also just a douche it's like holy shit like which came first here the chicken or the egg like did you get so sick of people treating you badly because you're overweight like i doubt it because most people don't walk

around treating people bad because they're fat in real life mostly it's just underhanded snickers behind your back or the bad attitude which came first i guess that's it yeah yeah you know seems like those things he's like there was a guy like that with next to me at subway like two weeks ago where he was a heavy guy uh i was in line behind him and he got his fucking footlong sub or whatever he was getting and in the vegetable section of it Where you know after when they're adding all the vegetables and the sauces and whatnot? He's like I want you know tomatoes all right, but man's like that's not enough tomatoes I was like she was then the guy was just like okay. Here's here's a couple more tomatoes

And he goes I want salt and pepper on the tomatoes And so the guy takes a salt and pepper on the tomatoes and so the guy takes the salt and pepper out and starts putting it on the sandwich and he goes i didn't say salt and pepper on the sandwich it says salt and pepper on the tomatoes you're getting it all over the sandwich and the guy was just in the this poor like small guy that i get sandwiches from all the time they were just like okay and he's like carefully drizzling it on there, and he's like all right now. I want mayo on it All right, here's stripe maize like I said light Mayo Like I know you didn't like I'm right here

I'm a different mom I see what I got a little fucking work here And you didn't know my playoffs and and the guys like all right well What do you want me to do? He's like well put some more light Mayo on and so I guess so he just puts a stripe of light Mayo in addition To the regular Mayo because I guess that means like well now we're halving the calories you have 150 the amount of mayo calories you realize that right yeah and you've got salt and pepper all over it but like i was just baffled standing there being like man you're a clearly not the best looking guy and my thought would have been

like oh he's going to be a sweet nice man and order kindly oh he got salt i meant to say only salt and pepper on the tomatoes but of course that's ridiculous i can't expect you to do that but no he just was cunty about it and it made me think like goddamn like yeah i it's a reminder attractive people are sometimes nice and ugly ones are sometimes mean. So, you know, don't listen to Hollywood. Anyway, I could not believe that you would ask someone at Subway to salt your tomatoes while it's on your sandwich. Can I just say, it's not that, I know Woody likes his tomatoes salted and peppered, first of all. I think I do as well. And if I were making my own sandwich, I wouldn't ask this because I

don't want to get into a whole thing, but if I were making that sub sandwich, if I were back there, I'd lay out about three tomato slices and I would carefully sprinkle each of them with salt and pepper and then place them on that sandwich. Tomatoes are one of my cheat items now. Yesterday, so I used to have a tomato sandwich, but now

bread is a memory because fuck me. And so I just have a tomato. Sometimes I'll bread is a memory because fuck me. And so I have a tomato. Sometimes I'll pour like a little drizzle of salt on it and eat it like an apple. And that's like one of my snacks if I'm having a hard time. Bread is not quite a memory for me. I ordered this sourdough loaf from San Francisco. It will be here any day now. I'm excited.

It's this big round. You ordered a sourdough loaf. They bake it, and they ship it the next day. The same day, I mean. They get this loaf to you hot off the oven in San Francisco, and apparently they pinch off a little bit of the dough from this 125-year-old

thing of dough they've got. So you've got the old-timey sourdough in there. So, yeah. I haven't given it up quite yet. Man, I would love to just eat a loaf of sourdough right now. Oh, my God. That's up there in my favorite breads.

It keeps flipping back to the whole, Kyle's like, there's like five things I do wrong, and if I fix any one of them, you know, here comes Adonis. And I'm just like, oh my god. Did you order a loaf of internet bread? Did you? I've already decided what I'm going to do with it. I've got a biscuit cutter that's really sharp.

I'm going to cut the center of it out. I'm going to core it. I'm going to core that and I'm going to pour queso in the middle. I'm going to pick the edges off and dip it inside of the middle of its own self. Turn it into a bowl for my queso. And then you're gonna have like a half pound...

Who am I kidding? Two pounds of soupy inside cheese bread? Yeah. It's gonna be delicious. I really love sourdough bread, so I am excited. So Colin quits on fitness, huh? No, because apparently he runs fine on one cylinder

that's all that matters yeah it's like kyle's like well there's five things need to fix in my diet one through three is that i enjoy frying things i'm what i call a fryer and four and five is that i order extreme strange breads off the internet sometimes for no reason that little you know instigation i just say that looks good, I'll order three. I saw that bread and they went on and on about how delicious this bread was and I was like, I do like sourdough.

Clickety click and it's one click and it's bought. It's on the way. Have you ever tried that 35 calorie a slice bread for sandwiches? No. It's like Nature's Own or some odd brand and you know if you want like a real slice of good bread for a sandwich it's like 110 calories or something like that and this one's like hey you get a sandwich just got 35 calories a slice and oh

my god there's a reason for it like it's it's got nothing to it it's like two basically sand kit not sand cakes. A wafer. I said rice cakes. I said sand cakes because that's what my mind thinks of when I think of rice cakes is sand. Just dry, brittle, awful, not pleasant. Without peanut butter, it's an abomination. But those 35-calorie slices of bread, not bad if you put like a third of a pound of turkey on it. Because then it's just like a delivery method for a ton of protein. Now it's a wrap!

In the same way that french fries could just be like ketchup shovels. You can get spinach wraps that are much better for you. I like wraps. That's one of the things that like, if I have to eat fast food and I'm trying to eat well, I'll get some sort of a wrap from McDonald's or Wendy's and it's like

a tortilla with a piece of grilled chicken in it. It can't be that bad. Oftentimes, those wraps have a lot of food in them. They weigh like two and a half pounds. They can be a good load of calories in there. It's just a bigger serving than you might guess. Have you ever looked up how many calories are in tortillas and what they use for wraps?

Because that tears down the wrap illusion quickly where like basically what you come to find is like all right these two pieces of bread together that'd be like 250 calories but what if you give them an enormous piece of flat bread and then pile stuff into it people will think it's less bread because it's thin and then like you check and it's the exact same amount like the tortilla at itoba is 300 calories i'm just thinking here like i bet if you bought a wrap didn't eat the bread but just the contents of it are usually not so bad like chicken and lettuce and whatever no you'd open it up and use a fork now the bread is a plate i bet that's not that bad i bet that's a a decent meal. It's not. You could actually... I get that at

Chipotle sometimes is the burrito bowl. And then you can use the back of the wrap to clean your hands. Yeah, and then throw it to the wind. Can you imagine if someone from... It could be biodegradable. I always thought if someone from Ethiopia saw

our calorie information and they weren't familiar with our culture, they might think it's like, oh, they need to make sure they have the energy necessary to continue the day. So you would not want to eat a low calorie sandwich or like whatever they would do. They think that low calorie notifications are warnings. Like be very careful. It is low calorie notifications are warnings. Like, be very careful. It is low calorie. It will not be true throughout your day of diamond mining. You will faint on the ladders. I think at first that the $5 footlong, a good deal, almost order the roast beef, only 600 calories.

Same price? Spicy Italian, 800 calories. 200 calories make a huge difference. Same price, spicy Italian, 800 calorie. 200 calorie make huge difference. Same price. They even give you a free water with nothing swimming inside. I've got a couple things. So one, I watched this documentary on Netflix. Don't remember the name of it.

But these kids went to like South America somewhere and tried to live off next to no money. Like South American wages and tried to live off next to no money, like, like South American wages and stuff. And they were just starving to death until a local family like adopted them and taught them to mix in fat with their, like, I don't know, rock soup or something. So, so yeah, they literally just add fat because they need the calories to make it through. And the other thing I was thinking, like, some of me, like, oh, this is a bad thought, but there has to be a chemical answer to weight loss, right? Like you see people pop on Adderall, their appetite is gone. Their metabolism is up. There's cheat codes

in this. You're more active. Your heart's, your heart made it, your heart is, all right. So if you think about it, I don't know if everybody does, your heart's always beating. It's a muscle that's always burning calories. If you smoke cigarettes, your heart rate is higher than it normally would be all fucking day long. You're burning more calories because of the cigarette, which is also an appetite suppressant. Now let's multiply that by 50. That's Adderall or any kind of amphetamine. Really, your heart rate's always really high.

Not really high. It never frightens me, but I'm like, yeah heart rate's always really high. Not really high. It never frightens me, but I'm like, yeah, it's a little higher than it normally is. And you're just energized. You're pumped and motivated, too. It's like, oh, there's some stuff out there that he's doing. I'll run to it. Well, even more than the metabolism is the low appetite. It kills your appetite.

It raises your metabolism. Cigarettes, like Kyle said, same thing. I was looking at a girl I went to high school with on Facebook, and it's like, she's pretty thin for, I assume she's 44 like I am. And it's like, right, but she's a smoker, right? She's working cheat codes. Well, there's plenty of fat smokers. Yeah.

That's true, but dude, there's also a lot of thin smokers. You know, people who are thinner than their peers and they're smokers. I bet smokers on average are thinner than their equivalent counterpart. Anecdotally, I would completely agree with that. This is sounding like a Marlboro ad. Right? Cigarette smokers are...

So I don't... I don't leave sex here. There's a lot of bad stuff that happens with cigarettes. One of the biggest is the stink, you know, and then there's health effects too. No smell cigarettes in Marlboro. No stink, no fat. Yeah, I kissed a

smoker once when I was a teenager, and I found her. I was just like, this is disgusting to me. But they do stay thinner. You can't argue with that. You can't argue with the results of smoking habitually.

Cocaine as well. Cocaine. I cut Kyle off. He's about to be funny. If you compare her skin to mine, I've got her beat. I'm just fatter. It really does match with your skin. Oh, and if you're a girl,

it makes your boobs sag. I have no idea, but I bet she's got saggy boobs. Yeah, this is like the rest of your skin loses elasticity. Smokers' boobs, they're the worst. Wow. Wow. The more you know. I did not know that.

Yeah. Chiz and I have been playing this Battle Royale-style game called Player Unknown's Battlegrounds. Player Unknown. Smoking guys have saggy balls. I don't really care. Royale style game called Player Unknown's Battlegrounds. Player Unknown... I don't think guys have saggy balls. I don't really care. I think that just comes with age. The game is named

Player Unknown's Battlegrounds, and Player Unknown isn't unknown. Everybody knows who he is. He's kind of a famous guy who was a really good player at DayZ and the Arma games, and he got with this gaming studio about a year ago and they created this game. Uh,

it's about nine or 10 months into production and it's an alpha like early release right now. And basically, uh, you can play single solo duo, which is two obviously, and then four player squad. And you begin the game in a cargo plane,

uh, flying over an Island and you pick uh whenever you want you jump out of the plane and fucking start perish like like uh skydiving to earth and you know you can kind of navigate because you're skydiving you can pick out which direction you want to go and then you pop your parachute you can pop high and you can sort of para glide really far away or you can pop early and get to the ground as fast as possible And it's a mad rush for guns and armor and gear and vehicles because you begin with like a t-shirt and tennis shoes And you quickly arm yourself and the map keeps shrinking. There's this circle That shrinks like every five minutes and makes the play area smaller and smaller and smaller game with that mechanic. It's real popular

Probably I don't know. Okay, forget it then. But it's so fucking addictive and so much fun. I'm traditionally really bad at PC first-person shooters. Like, when we play Counter-Strike, I'm just awful. But I'm pretty good at this. I get kills. I don't, like, just shit the bed and, like, fudge stuff up. Like, when I'm supposed to get a kill. I get kills. I don't just shit the bed and fudge stuff

up. When I'm supposed to get a kill, I get the kill. And they're super, super satisfying to kill someone because everybody is terrified in the game. It's a lot like Mad Max or The Walking Dead where if you see a person, oh shit. Alright, fucking go into game mode.

You're crouch walking and hiding because the sound whoring is so good. We played seven hours yesterday. We played seven hours of this shit. Like, into the night playing duos and squad. I like the idea of it being similar, like the you survive

DayZ aspect, but the way you and Chiz are describing it at least, it seems like it doesn't have that, you know, oh, I just played for six hours and I lost everything. Like, it doesn't have that frustrating aspect. The games have been last, like, sometimes the game lasts five minutes. You drop in, but you happen to drop in next to another guy, and there's a mad rush for anything and everything,

and maybe you grab a frying pan, but he grabs a shotgun, and he just takes you out, and it's game over. But some games last maybe 40 minutes to the point where I've won a game, which is a big deal, apparently. I didn't know that. They're 100-man servers, and my squad won a game. And it says, winner, winner, chicken dinner, and everybody cheered and went crazy. I had no idea how rare it was, but I've won one, and I placed top 10 almost every single time. Is that how you place top 10 is basically you were among the last 10 to still be on the map yeah yeah because inevitably you get down to one player if it's solo two if it's duo and then or the final squad uh and then the game's over but the the circles

keep shrinking no matter what so at the end of the game there might be four teams playing inside of a really small area and people are it's like vietnam people are hiding behind shitty cover and there's just bullets cutting shit down all around you it's uh it's really intense at times and then there's like long periods of just boring silence um if you're not looking for for battle where you just loot and scramble for stuff but then if you want to go looking for a fight it's it's not hard to find it's uh if you live stream that you know with the camera and like like you know proper live stream i bet you'd make like noteworthy money i bet maybe good audience i bet you'd make you know even out of his start you know two hundred dollars or something and then they would go up from there as you built a schedule.

Chiz and I were talking about, well, he is. He said he was going to record some tonight because we got so many really, really funny clips last night or moments that were just noteworthy. It was like, oh, if this were in a video or even a movie or something,

if that scenario went down in a live-action movie, you'd be like, oh, that was crazy. Can you believe he came in at the last minute and saved the day? there was a moment where my you know my teammate is behind a tree and and he's flanked three bad guys and he starts taking them out one by one but they turn on him and they knock him down and our guy is crippled and crawling and they've still got one guy over there just shooting at him trying to finish him off and out of nowhere

chiz comes in a buggy and crusheses the bad guy against a tree at full speed, and that's the game. There's so many moments like that where we're just all cheering and having a great time. I feel like, as a business model, I bet Twitch earns ten times what YouTube does in the gaming world. Probably. Which is why, nowadays, YouTube for gaming channels,

with a few exceptions, is mostly just like a promotional avenue for their Twitch. You know, like, with a few exceptions, is mostly just like a promotional avenue for their Twitch. If someone has whatever, half a million subs on YouTube, they keep that alive so that people watch them on Twitch. Yeah. I would like to do that. That would be a lot of fun. I've got to get better at the game though before I want to show anyone my live performance. I can run around and I can shoot people, but I don't know if anybody would want to show anyone my live performance. I can run around and I can shoot people, but I don't know if anybody would want to watch it.

Do you think it's related to how good you are? Somewhat. If we got a good squad together, maybe it wouldn't matter. Yeah, I'd consider that. I'd like to do that. I don't think I have the internet connection right here to do it, though. I forgot about that. What is your upload now? Did it get better ever? Not very much better. Are you off or something? No, no, no. Okay, I'm sorry. What's your upload now? Did it get better ever? Not very much better.

No, no, no. What's your upload now? It's like two or something. It's poor. It won't work. I'd have to rent an apartment and make that my live streaming apartment. That'd have to be my live streaming office, basically. The idea of just making compilations

is a good idea. If Chiz was like, I just making compilations it is a good idea if chiz was like yeah but that goes around yeah but that gets around what he was saying that that twitch is where you would really want to be and with and live stream i'd like to live stream because it would be fun i've always wanted to do that just never had the upload i thought i i i like watch playing the game and talking as long as i do it's fun. Even now your upload is really just two? Yeah. Huh. I wonder if his phone is better. He's livestreamed from his hotspot. From the hotspot. Yeah. That's a thing too. Could get one of those Verizon files things.

I did that in Florida. You guys know the story. I stayed at that hotel before. I tested the internet connection and then I tested the internet connection. And then I stayed the next time. I was in a different building because it's a motel at different sections. And the internet connection was terrible. I really thought I did my due diligence to make sure it was okay. Anyway, during PKA, a lot of it I streamed from my phone because I thought it was better than the hotel. Yeah, yeah.

I've definitely done PKAs from my phone before. It works pretty good for that. I don't know what the upload. Yeah, yeah. I've definitely done PKs for my phone before. It works pretty good for that. I don't know what the upload and download speed is. I'd have to check. This new phone is better. Speed test is a, you know, it's an Android and iPhone app, so you could find out. Yeah, I had it on my last phone.

I would watch it on the live stream. I'd want to see that. Yeah. It would be easy to put a good team together that could actually win i mean i was playing with some just some random fans that sent me a message uh yesterday and we won those guys were really good there were a bunch of british guys and uh i did my british accent at some point oh fellas is it motorcycle helmet over here and and they had no sense of humor about it whatsoever he was like he just went pardon me and i was like um there's a

helmet yeah i'm sure any of the three of us have enough social media reach that we could put together a team that wins most of the time yeah it's uh when you're playing is there a problem at all of i wouldn't think as much because the shrinking map but is there ever a problem of like oh god damn it i didn't get top five because you know sneaky pete one one two over there was sitting in the corner the whole time with no kills being like is there do you have to participate to win or if you just okay so it's you can't just camp and hide out no because the combat the map area keeps constricting usually toward the dead center of the map more more or less. And so that's where there's bigger concentrations of people. And so there's this constant flood of people sort of migrating

toward that circle. And if you're just hiding somewhere, you're probably don't have great gear because you haven't been running around scavenging enough. And the gear matters because there's like level one armor, level two armor, level three armor, and the same with helmets and the same with everything in the game. So if you're naked and have a good gun and try to shoot some guy with level three face mask or level three helmets level three armor he's gonna turn he might turn on you and just kill you um and with the constricting thing you just can't hide have you found that most of the time for the beginning you're hopping out of the plane and being like all right i'm getting to the fucking center first and i'm gonna grab the sniper rifle or whatever. I'm getting to the

cornucopia. Or are you like, alright, I'm gonna land in the corner and then mischievously find my way in picking people off. Yeah, we've tried all kinds of different strategies. You've gotta keep in mind that it's one of those games like DayZ where the map is an island and it's absolutely

enormous to the point where I haven't seen the whole map, not even close in my 12 hours of playing. Um, not even close. Uh, so you, you, you can drop in multiple towns.

There's maybe eight different towns and there's an, there's a military base and there's a nuclear power base. So there's plenty of spots to go to that'll be good concentrations of shit. But usually we try to get really off the beaten path. So, and you can kind of look around as you're parachuting in and see if anyone else is landing with you and i don't like to land with people and have like a mad scramble for frying pans and handguns where we have to fight naked

i really like them like what stuff spawns or is it like do people know like all right i'm just going to nuclear power plant because the second floor there is a sniper? Or is it all random? It's not random at all. It may be like whether or not there's a SCAR in this bathroom or an M16 in this bathroom is random. But there are definitely areas that we all know are like hot spots and concentrated areas for high-end gear. And people will really try to go for those spots. You'll see like 15 people landing in this one building complex,

and it's like, well, shit, like four guys are going to get out of there with a ton of gear, but pretty much everybody else is going to get slaughtered that goes there. So we'll try to find like some just houses or apartments or something off the beaten path, and you can find gear easily. It's not like DayZ where you would spend hours looking, and you would feel naked and like not have a gun or bullets for it you almost within five minutes 10 minutes of landing you have an m16 with a scope and it's fully automatic and you have armor and a backpack and gear and bandages and now it's

now you're looking for a car or something to taylor's question oh i woody craft used to have a game mode called hunger games or survival games because it was copyrighted and uh uh anyway the people that like battled each other like let's say that Kyle's gear on a scale of one to ten was a two and then mine was a three so I win now I take all the stuff off his corpse and I'm kind of like a five and you can and then say the game's 20 minutes long the last five minutes, everyone gets teleported into this restrictive temple where they fight it out.

And the guys who were just hiding in the corner for their lives, they're naked with a stick, right? Meanwhile, the people who have fought and successively upped their way through, they're in diamond armor and swords and bows and arrows and shit. When you kill a guy, especially in squads,

like when we kill another team, we'll set an ambush. One thing I like to do because cars are super rare. Not super rare, but they're super valuable, and you don't see them often. Not everybody has a car. You won't see a car every game. We'll park the car in the middle of the road and then surround it out in bushes and buildings and just wait for some poor guy to come along and be like, look, it see a car every game we'll park the car in the middle of the road and then surround it

out in bushes and buildings and just wait for some poor guy to come along look it's a car and as soon as he like gets in and tries to like get in we all just open up kill him and then we go and take all of his shit and that's the best part of the game when the guy's dead and there's a crate of his shit there and everybody's like yeah yeah yeah oh i've got 762 ammo do you need a scope yeah i need a scope here's your and we all take their shit and then reset and then do it all over again. So you just set a little trap. I like setting ambushes. They should let you play as a female character,

and then you can go out there with no armor and just, like, hold X to cry for help. Now people will think that they're helping, but really it's more Walking Dead-ish. Do you remember the paintball guy who just tagged everybody? I think he had, like, a two-barrel paintball gun, but mostly he was just a ninja who would sneak up on people and tag them. It'd be cool to see someone do that against your play style.

Just like work their way around the ambush and, you know, gotcha. There's a lot of mind games. There's a lot of mind games because the doors to every building are shut by default so if you if you look in the distance through your scope or whatever and you see that the door on the house is opened inward then someone went in that door if you see it's opened outward on the other side you know he's already left that that building because you always push a door when you interact with one so you can kind of look at four buildings off in the in the distance and be like that one's been gone through that one's been gone through, that one's been gone through. No one's left that building yet.

And you can really work out if there are people there, where people might be by just how doors are left open or if a building's been gone through yet. And the distance, the draw distance I think it's called, the distance that you can see stuff, including other players, is enormous. And it's super dependent on what kind of scope you have. That's why every time you get a scope, you're like, oh, now my... It's like your character's vision just went up by 20%. Now you can actually see people who are more than 500 yards

away. We were playing a little while ago and Chiz had a 4-power scope, and he's shooting at this guy about 1,200 meters away, and the guy can hear the bullets so he's shooting at this guy about 1200 meters away and the guy can hear the bullet so he's laying down but he has no idea where they're coming from and and he's just aiming higher and higher and higher um it's gonna lob in a bullet yeah it it's it's more like real the the parts of it that mimic real life and the sort of shitty things that you could do to another person in like a walking dead Mad Max style scenario are the things

that I enjoy the most. Like fucking people over and setting traps and like out thinking them in one way or another. Can they hear you? We have it set up so they can't but you can set it up the other way so there's proximity so they can hear you. Seems like the best way to do it

would be to keep them turned off so they don't know your plan. Yeah we do team only and to keep them turned off so that they don't know your plan. Yeah, we do team only and that's how we actually communicate. We don't use Skype or anything. We use the in-game communication and just make it team only. What happens if we're in a group of four? If we all hopped on, all four of us, and played, and

let's say two minutes in, I get sniped. Am I allowed to... Does it just boot me right away or am I allowed to spectate my squad? You spectate. You spectate, and I've had maybe three or four games where I died really early, and then I had to watch my squad. And it's, honestly, I never minded once.

It's really entertaining to watch, and I like to play like a support character. I'll be the one looking at the map and figuring out where we need to go next, because you have a very nice map that you can scroll in and zoom into, and it's like a geographical, real-world map. And I'll sound-whore for

them, because I seem to be better at that than anybody else. The sound-whoring is off the chain in this game. If they want to sneak up on you, crouch-walking doesn't even cut it. They have to crouch, aim-walk, and move at like a snail's pace. That happened to me last game I played actually we've

had any any bad deaths yet that have where you've been like oh i appear quite the fool like that kind any good stories of that many many deaths like that um i've had i i there's plenty of times where i just run out in the open like a dummy and get shot. Last night I had a shining moment in front of my whole squad. I was really proud. Chiz, one of our guys goes upstairs to the third floor. He's dead. We don't know what happened. Chiz is like, I'll go.

I'll go. I'm going to get him. I'm going to get him. I'm like, wait, Chiz. Let me catch up. Let me catch up. Let me catch up. Chiz is dead.

Fuck. I get up there and the bad guy is taking Chiz's shit. He's rifling through Chiz's dirty old dead pockets. And I open up on him. I kill him and switch to an AK and look at the distance and see four more guys. And I kill two of them with my AK. And then I switch to my shotgun and go to the stairs. And I kill one more of them before you can come up the stairs.

And then they blew me up. But it was just a real—moments like that, even when you just get a four-kill streak, are just heart-pounding and cheering-type moments, because the kills are hard to earn. They're really, really hard to earn. There's med kits, there's medical kits, first aid kits,

and bandages. Medical kits. Yeah, they're in three tiers. And you apply them to yourselves, and depending on... A bandage takes like three seconds to apply. A first aid kit, like seven seconds. And a medical kit, like 15 seconds or something.

And they heal larger and larger amounts of your health. Things like Red Bull heal you. Painkillers help. So the healing's pretty instant. It just takes a while to apply. Yeah, it takes quite a while to apply. And the kits themselves are not frivolously used. They're pretty rare.

Yeah, not ultra rare. You almost always have two on you, but you won't have four, you know? How many bullets to kill someone? Four bullets most of the time, dead center to kill them. And range definitely starts taking away from that. So it's a lot. Yeah, you were saying you have to like aim higher because they

have the bullet drop off effect how much was the game 30 it's um it yeah the bullet drop isn't as extreme as like real life but it's extreme enough that it's required you got to add it in or sometimes you won't hit a guy um it's so fucking... I don't know if I mentioned this from the beginning, but there's 100 players in every single game you play. There's never a game where it's like, oh, only 60 joined, only 85. It's 100 every single time. It seems to be wildly popular.

Are the people that run the servers making any money? Just, you know, no reason. Just throwing it out there. I don't you know no reason just throwing it out there I don't know enough about I see that there's an option for custom games but I think because it's early access it's not on like private servers I think that they're serving the game

but I don't know much about that stuff I don't see an option but it's not like with Counter Strike or something like that where I've got to like, oh, I'm going to join this server where these rules are applied. It's public matches. That's what I mean to say. Yeah, there are public matches that I've been playing.

Oh, so you're playing sponsored by the makers of the game. Yeah. Yeah. Because the game is like brand new, right? Like this is the first wave of people playing. Oh, when you play it, do you go to alpha or do you just go to regular game? Because it gave me

the option to click both. I still haven't started mine up. So what I have downloaded is called Player Unknown's Battlegrounds. And that's it. I see that there's I downloaded the test server that they have too, but I haven't. That's what I meant, test server. Yeah, you don't need to use the test server.

That's where they're testing out the new patches and stuff, I would imagine. Oh, that's cool. I'm excited to try this out. The thing I loved about DayZ was it felt like a real-life simulator in so many ways. It's like, oh, this is exactly how it would be if I had dropped in on this island naked. It would suck. It wouldn't go well most of the time.

And this game captures that and that immersion that you can get into with your character and stuff. But it's also fun to play. And four hours don't go by before me, Woody, and Chiz find each other using the sun. That's the worst part.

Oh, my God. There's a map. You press M, and a big map pops up. You right-click any point, and a yellow avatar pops up on it. And anybody can place points anywhere they want. Navigation is a cinch. That's where Disney fucked up. I just Oh my god

I get it if you make it too easy If I could just teleport to Kyle at the start of the game That would maybe take away From that aspect of it But for us to be like well I put the water on my left side You put it on your right side And eventually we'll find each other

Even if we're wrapping around the mountain Unless We're back to back right now Unless you pass like ships in the night and eventually we'll find each other, even if we're wrapping around the mountain. Unless we're back-to-back right now. Unless you pass ships in the night. I'm not even sure. Yeah, and then you run and you run and you run and you run, and you see someone and you're like,

Kyle, are you a girl? That's not me. Oh, no. There's no question. Oh, no. Well, then you're in deep shit. You want realism in these games but not too much like if they came out with skyrim again they're like skyrim now with realistic cardio capabilities for your characters so you can't just hold sprint and just go like this up mountains because in skyrim that's what i loved about it where it's like oh you you

better follow this waypoint 10 miles around it's like no how about I take just as long and go right up the side of the mountain and then I'll be there like or straight jumping Skyrim I don't have as much time as you guys but like your character can climb mountains you know it's whatever but a horse oh my god they're like four-wheel drive or something like they just horses are climbing unwalkable surfaces there's cliffs and maybe they like you could do that when facing giants in that game where if you were on like i don't know i think it works for all the horses not just like the specter ghost assassin horse or whatever where you could just gallop up onto the side of a mountain and then just sit there as the giant looked at it like,

ah, can't quite get him. Can't quite get him from there. I can't walk up this slight incline the way that horse can. Yeah. Here's a nice clip for you, Woody. Skyrim's gotten a lot of attention. Even now, people talk about Skyrim, and that game is four years old. It's a great game. I love it.

Yeah, they keep remastering it. They keep modding it, making cooler shit for it. Oh, I was thinking about Paramotors. Paramotors would be a great add-on to the Battlegrounds game that we've been playing. As we've been playing it more and more, we see things that could be improved, that we think at least.

And one of the things is, like, we could use a few more cars or vehicles, or at least types of them, and a paramotor would fit into this game well. You're not always so close to people that you'd immediately get shot down, and there are vast distances to cover at times. It would be really

cool to be able to take off from a little field and then putt back down and zip around like that, get a bird's eye view. A paramotor would work in this game. I wish it were in there. That could be a DLC. Or on the best Battlegrounds server in the multiverse. If that ever pops up, maybe that's another item.

Who knows? Who knows what the future brings? I'm watching this clip that Taylor sent on repeat. It actually kind of repeats on its own. Yeah, you should open it too. Very good. Very good clip. I really have to commend number...

Number two here, I think. Oh, his knee! His face. He gives him kind of a forearm to the chin. I didn't catch his knee. Look at his left knee on the hit. He gets pretty bad on his knee, but the reason

they're stating that he's out is because of a concussion. Because he gets caught with a stick right in the side of the head there. Yeah, I saw that on the second clip. No, I thought I saw a forearm. I missed the stick. He got hit a few times. This is like one of those car crashes

where it doesn't end right away well that's right because lord knows that uh crosby would do this to somebody else did he just take off a finger three weeks ago he took a three-hit combo on the way in i don't know this is like some mortal combat shit he got messed up fucking what he took was a little karma to the face a little karma to the face a little karma to the knee to woody's point in fairness i i bet mark mathot is still growing back his fingertip right now i bet that's a guy who watched this clip and is like that's what you get you fuck like yeah i bet he's loving it but oh man pittsburgh fans got to be a little nervous now because he's not he's not like losing any other player in the league

like you're it's not like you can't replace sydney crosby like they're now don't make too big a deal out of it he's not anything he's not the best player on earth by a sizable margin definitely not that's what i'm saying uh yeah yeah that was a brutal hit though i feel bad for him just because you know he's a good player and he's fun to watch since I don't have anything against the Pens because we only play them like three times a year. But, man, that – you have to wonder if he did that personally. He's trying to watch him grow a playoff beard.

Outside of that, he's just a piece of shit. He grows a very bad playoff beard. I noticed that when he's just a piece of shit. He grows a very bad playoff. I noticed that when he got whacked there. Yeah, it's more of just a playoff mustache. Someone made a Pokemon card of Sidney Crosby. The Crybaby Pokemon. And then it just has his moves as cry

and complain to refs. What were his moves? Cry and what? Oh, and complain to refs. Call Bettman, who's the NHL commissioner, to be like, suspend him for hitting me. But yeah, that really sucks for Pittsburgh fans. And Washington fans have to be ecstatic. The way that whole clip goes, though...

How is that series going? 2-1, Pittsburgh leads. Yeah, I actually knew knew that i didn't know if there had been more games that fell off and two to one is also no st louis plays tonight but they're losing two to one right yes nashville is over st louis two one edmonton's over the ducks two one which i did not expect uh ottawa two nothing lead over the rangers and penguins two one over the caps right now but i mean good god if the caps fucking lose this series now after sydney crosby is out after they just traded for shattenkirk for the blues from the blues and they're just stacked like if they

don't win it this year good god like you guys just move to baltimore and pretend you're a new franchise to get those demons off your back. Like, there's just no way that they're going to. Yeah, the Hartford Whalers. Bring them back. Dude, I. They should bring them back. They have the coolest logo.

They wore pants. That's the coolest part about the Hartford Whalers. I'm sure this is killing Kyle. But those fuckers wore. Everyone else wears shorts in hockey. Every team. The Hartford Whalers came... Everyone else wears shorts in hockey. Every team. The Hartford Whalers came out there in long pants. They were the best.

It did look ridiculous because if you look at photos of them now, like here's a guy who's clearly from old-timey hockey. What the fuck? Why wouldn't that just pop up? Like the pants look is very very slavic uh here we are i i thought the last one was what we were looking at they're just sending me the photo book okay i don't know how it's like a it's like a track suit yeah it's like a track suit. It's like a track suit on the bottom.

It's even got the stripes. Oh, it's not coming up for me. I was telling you, it's like when Russians and Slavic people squat in those pants. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's doing it. Do you have another? He's doing it. I don't know how Kyle got to this link. I can't get to it. I had to click the redirect thingy.

Me too. I used to wear pants when I played ice hockey. Something about tape and their stockings. Hockey players wear these long socks. They call them stockings. And my shin pads would have a tendency to slide around my calves and go sideways and stuff. So I liked pants where I could tape them up a little better.

Here we go. Yeah. That guy's looking good. Look at that goalie's blocker to get an idea of what year we're looking at here. Wow. Oh, you gave another picture. It's medieval. Oh, and his mask.

His mask, he's just got the regular face plate. Hockey mask. I like the hockey pants. They're better. They are better. Everyoneockey mask. I like the hockey pants. They're better. They are better. Everyone wears shorts. I understand shorts are cooler. I didn't realize they wore shorts until just now.

Right? Yeah, they're really, they're just padded, padded shorts to make sure you don't. You know, like if you throw a baseball at like a bed sheet on a clothesline, it doesn't do much. That's sort of the theory behind the hockey shorts. They're just kind of padded and bagged. Catch it. Okay. Yeah.

And obviously you need some pads there so you're not seeing three broken tailbones a game. Yeah. You fall on your face on ice pretty often. So that was good news. Sidney Crosby's badly injured, it appears. That's good news. He's badly injured, it appears. That's good news. He's badly injured, it appears. Yeah, I mean, I don't

like the news that he's hurt, but I like feeling like the Caps have a little more chance now. Come on, Caps. Let's get this done. It's about time you made it. Speaking of hurt, I think I have a broken thumb. I hope it's not broken, but that's actually my current theory. Let's see it. There's not much to see. It's been two weeks. It looks normal. If I were to say squeeze broken, but that's actually my current theory. Let's see it. There's not much to see. It's been two weeks.

It looks normal. If I were to, say, squeeze this, that would hurt a lot. And every so often, just in its range of motion, like normal, it clicks and there's a pretty extreme pain in there. My theory is that somewhere there's like a bundle of tiny bones in there that they're not connected like they're supposed to be anymore like i get pins in this hand i don't know i'm meeting with a surgeon on the 14th the same guy that fixed my other hand which seems to be working fine yeah so uh so i i

got with him again i might even call and be like can we speed this up because i'll make a short story long the last time i waited like four weeks six weeks to to like see a doctor because hoping it would heal and they're like whoa you are right on the edge of like a surgery window let's let's book you for tomorrow and that's that's how it went down so i'm like maybe like i don't know when did i do an icarus race that was like four weeks ago already right yeah you should go get that checked out you end up having to get an orangutan thumb I don't know. When did I do the Icarus race? That was like four weeks ago already, right? Yeah, you should go get that checked out. You'll end up having to get an orangutan thumb or something.

That doesn't sound bad, really. It's all orange. All that orange fur, you're going to be shaving it all the time? I don't know. Maybe let it ride. But yeah, so anyway, I'm worried that my thumb is really hurt. It's not healing anymore. Now, I met with the guy.

I mentioned it in the PKA Hangout. We just did it. And he's like, if you can move it, it's not broken. And I thought, well, he sounded really confident. I guess it's fine. But then I remembered that the last one was broken, and I couldn't move it. Yeah, right?

Yeah. And I mean, we always talk about how successful those guys are. He's not a goddamn doctor though. Yeah, no, he's not. He even mentioned that. He said, I'm not a doctor, but if you can move it,

it's not broken. So we'll see. Yeah, I usually don't want to hear what comes after, hey, I'm not a doctor, but I just want to cut him off. We'll keep it to your fucking self then because it sounds medical

like it let's say kyle that you hypothetically had like a lot of chronic problems with your right knee sometimes those people become knee doctors you know like dominic cruz has had four i think knee surgeries it's at least three it might be be four. And he's talking about, he's using all the medical terms. I swear to God, if you gave him like a pile of parts, he could reassemble a human knee and put it all in the right spot. That guy has like an associate's degree in knee surgery from having had several of them. And so sometimes he paid for it. Yeah. Like you're like, y'all trust me, like, you know, I have whatever, a rhythmic heart, whatever, then he becomes an expert in that condition, almost doctor level.

Yeah, that makes sense. I bet he sat through a lot of explanations from very expensive appointments. Probably soaked a little of that in. Yeah, yeah, and rehabs and the whole nine yards. Taylor, what are you posting? This is one more thing for you to see that you would like, Woody. Same game, a Penguins player hit and concussed another Penguins player because the Washington guy dip-dived and dodged him.

Oh, and he's mad. I missed the beginning. The request is curious. Oh, that was excellent. Yeah. What a great movie. Oh, that was excellent. Yeah. What a great movie. Oh, that's fantastic. But it's not the hurt guy that's pissed, is it?

No, the hurt guy has a concussion. He's out. He was the one walking down the hallway covering his face with a towel. Yeah. Is the angry guy the one that hit him? Yeah, Hornquist. He's the one who hit him. Well, I need to see this again. It doesn't, to me, look like Hornquist he's the one who hit him well i i need to see this again it doesn't to me look

like hornquist really pulled back oh number 20 pulled a huge dodge on him though he he wasn't pulling back he was trying to hit as hard as he could and that guy dodged it like a cartoon character now that i see it yeah he had he had kind of left his skate it's look like it looked like to me he was on one skate which is illegal. So he was going all out to deliver. Yeah, he pushed off with his right leg so hard that it's in the air. Yeah, he's giving him all he's got. He was halfway slew footing the – Like a speed skater?

You kind of leave your leg out there to hit the other guy's leg. Oh, my God. He was totally slew footing that guy. Watch it again. Taylor knows what I'm talking about. leg. Oh, my God. He was totally slew footing that guy. Watch it again. Taylor knows what I'm talking about. Yeah, he was trying to. He was trying. It's in hockey.

This is a very, very dirty move. You sort of leave your leg hanging out there to hit the other guy's knee. And I'm ready for it. You're not. You lose that battle. So he was trying to slew foot the Washington guy. Yeah, the Washington guy had his right foot extended, which means his leg was open for Hornquist

to come in, brace his right knee, and go knee-to-knee with the guy. And if you're going knee-to-knee on the ice going that fast, the guy who doesn't have his knee braced is likely going to get his knee fucked, which is why it's very frowned upon. And the Washington guy dodged it masterfully, and his teammate caught

a fucking high one to the face. What a great dodge. Yeah, that was great. And then you can see how mad Hornquist is because he knows that he's the one who totally fucked that up. You saw that Sheery, the guy that you hit on your team, was right behind him. What the fuck were you thinking,

throwing such a huge hit like that? Even if he had hit the correct player, he would have driven him into his own teammate. That's a hell hit like that. Even if he had hit the correct player, he would have driven him into his own teammate. That's a hell of a hit. Did what? Did Washington win this game? Yes, they did. I don't even know.

Number 43, is he a big player for Pittsburgh or just third-line defense or something? No, he has really been doing well for pittsburgh connor sherry so connor sherry who apparently is hot right now sydney crosby and the game this was a banner night for washington but who knows how good he really is because this happens with the penguins oh look at this he tries to hit him with his stick as he's going down like like when he makes impact his right hand is off his stick. After he hits his teammate, he brings his right hand to the stick, and he slashes from 3 o'clock to 7 o'clock over the other player's shoulder and misses. I do see the slash. I'm not 100% sure that's intentional.

We'll keep watching. He might have just been off balance and falling. Wow. That's a good version. Pittsburgh is the most hateable team in all of fucking hockey, and it's awesome to watch them go three stooges on each other. It is the worst thing to watch when your team does that, and they drill their own guy, because it's like you're watching Mighty Ducks. You're like, oh, Jesus Christ. Like, fuck, this doesn't bode well.

And you know that that ruins morale on the bench when they're like, all right, guys, just because we lost Sidney Crosby doesn't mean a thing. You're some of the... Sidney Crosby didn't win that championship last year by himself. Oh, he's the best player in the NHL. Setting records doesn't mean nothing. You guys got...

Wait, what record did Sidney Crosby break? I'm saying that, like, as far as production... Maybe a team record. I was I'm saying that as far as production of points, goals, assists in the playoffs, Crosby's kind of right now mostly in his own league because he's so good. But you know that that Pittsburgh coach had to have a real conversation. Crosby's gone. We can still do it. And I like to imagine that as he was describing that, you hear that and you're like oh no Hornquist did you just oh fuck fuck

god damn it. It's okay guys we got a really good farm system we're going to do some call ups and we can still win this thing these guys sometimes they say you know the best game in the pros is in the playoffs against the capitals for the first time so I will say dude the Flyers it seems like and maybe this is all the pros is in the playoffs against the capitals for the first time so i will give them a go the

flyers it seems like and maybe this is all teams but whenever the flyers call up some rookie from the phantoms it seemed like that guy was on fire like suddenly that guy's one of the best players on the team because he's i don't know maybe just given 110 while everyone else is just another day at the office but you do a call up like that that, and the guy's going to get a point. He's always going to get a point. It's a weird thing in a lot of sports, not just hockey, that rookie seasons will often be better than their sophomore season, and they'll call it the sophomore slump,

because you come into the first season, you kill it, and you think, I'm so good, I'm going to be in this league forever. And then you realize, oh, fuck, is the nfl or nba or nhl like every one of these people has capacity to be as good or better than me so i gotta keep it ratcheted up but yeah it's hard to know which ones are gonna be good with pittsburgh it seems like every year like this guy shiri they're like man connor shiri playing great out of nowhere nobody thought he was that great until he got put on a line with syney fucking Crosby. And then, whoa, he starts getting points.

And then you take him off of Sidney Crosby's line. And they're like, ah, nope, nope. Once again, it was Sidney Crosby doing that. You give Sidney Crosby a lot of credit. He deserves a fuck ton of credit. He's the best player in the world. He is not. Anyway, Kyle is having.

He is a disabled player. Kyle's in pre-aneurysm right now. He's got to have a blood clot first. You guys want to call it? Yeah, I guess it's time. Good stuff. Anyway, PKN episode 142. I could talk all night.

Bye, guys.