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pkn episode 177 i'm having a bad hair day oh no one can tell yeah i hope you're mostly audio
audience you don't know so kyle you were just explaining the first thing that you dislike about
the new place not having your mattress there has anything else sifted in that you're like oh i
didn't anticipate this about city living after
being in a rural area for so long or is it still two thumbs up no it's two thumbs up for sure it's
just my mattress like i i woke up yesterday morning in pain and i woke up this morning with
like lower back pain and it was like really bad so much so that i was just like tossing and turning
and then like i laid on the floor for a while hoping that that would fix it.
And I've just been taking like – yeah, it was really painful in my lower back.
And I hurt my lower back when I was like 13 on a diving board.
And if I like – if I sit in a – like I remember if I sit in a position where like my knees are much higher than like my butt.
position where like my knees are much higher than like my butt so like if i'm in like the back seat of a truck and like a shitty like bench seat where like your knees are higher than your like butt
you know or or in like uh stadium seating like i remember the gym in my middle school had that
sort of thing where it gets really painful but most of the time like 99 of my life like it
doesn't hurt doesn't hurt at all have you ever gone to like a chiropractor for it i've been to a chiropractor but you know he's he's not a real doctor he's just like he's
just cracking stuff in your back and i i don't know about i think a lot of them are quacks i
think some of them actually do you some good but i don't think i probably have like you know what
you'll never hear from a chiropractor? You're cured.
Or we need to operate. You'll hear that from doctors all the time.
Yeah, from a chiropractor, it's like, I don't know.
Like, you're still going to be, you know, in a bit of pain next week.
Like, oh, well, you're the boss.
Like, they got to keep you coming back.
Yeah, absolutely.
You know, they want you to come back for, like, monthly readjustments, right?
So I probably have something wrong in my lower back that could be fixed with a surgery
or something like that.
It's not debilitating or anything.
Yet, this mattress...
You're laying on your back hoping to
relieve the pain. That's pretty debilitating.
Yeah.
I went on the floor
trying to find some relief,
some escape.
I was thinking people lie on the floor,
like on a hard surface sometimes when they have back issues,
and maybe that would do the trick.
But it's just terrible.
And there's like three beds in this place, right?
Kitty got the master bed, and it is like, I touched it,
and I'm like, oh, my God, this is a wonderful bed.
Like, what the fuck?
And then my bed is definitely like three tiers down from that. so it's one of those beds that when you're in it and
you like move a little like the whole thing like like shakes around and stuff
like I had I'm not suggesting that you sleep with Kitty only that you sleep
with Kitty yeah right right and I had a like when you said moving and the whole
thing moves it's like you
know when you watch those commercials and they put like a wine glass on the bed they're like now look
at this fucker jumping up and down it's not going anywhere like that happened literally this this
past weekend i had a girl in my bed with me and she was drinking out of a like can of a lacroix
can like some water and as we were laying down and she was she was reaching over to put it on the bedside table,
but I have a king-size bed and there's plenty of room.
And I'm like, no, just put it on the mattress. You can move as much as you want.
That's not going to fall over. This is a Casper
mattress.
Yeah.
This mattress is the opposite of that.
I was having sex on that bed
a couple days ago,
and the whole thing
is moving around and it's squeaking and making noise it's like in a western when they're having
sex like upstairs and everybody down in the bar room is like looking up at the ceiling and like
dust is falling from the ceiling it's like that and of course there's a third bedroom here and
that mattress is shit tier
like they just threw that mattress in to like claim that they're a three bedroom
there's no way i can go in there and get on that thing so uh it's i'm hoping that you didn't ever
realize during sex could be better is like the the mattress noise because of course you know
usually most people have the spring
and you just get accustomed to like even like getting up in the middle of the night you know
on a spring mattress like there's like a little like noise like that and especially fucking but
these these casper mattresses no noise at all like any of the foam kind of mattress it's it
really is the way of the future and i don't i don't get the the big complaint i see about them
is like oh i just get so hot i get so hot sleeping on it's like i don't get that either
no like i'm no hotter than i am on a pillow top mattress yeah same i uh i love my pillow
pillow top mattresses are kind of cozy sometimes they are they're fucking expensive yeah like if
you want a nice one like a nice king size mattress that's probably like three grand or so i was gonna say four yeah i i saw one for four grand they're just they're
really expensive oh i finally picked out a tv to get but i wasn't i was like ready at uh the store
yesterday to buy it and i was like looking at like i was about to go get the attendant and be like i
want this one and then i was looking at at the box and looking at the dimensions,
and I'm like, this is not going to fit in my car.
There's a 0% chance this will fit in my car.
And so I had to go ask the guy. Would you drive again an Impala?
A Chrysler 300C.
So it's very, very big for a sedan,
but not big enough to fit a 65-inch Samsung 4K.
You need a pickup.
Yeah, and I literally sent that out
in a group text today to my friends i'm
like hey any of you pickup fellas want to help me out this weekend getting my tv back home and
of course someone said yes uh but yeah i'm very excited about it like i i really underestimated
how big that tv is gonna fucking be because i have like a 50 inch tv right now and it's pretty big
from the distance I'm sitting.
It's always been good enough for me.
But this thing, like I was imagining it last night,
and I'm like, oh, yeah.
Oh, it's going to be like theater seating in these things.
I'm excited for it.
I didn't get the curved one because I looked up online,
and Kyle, your recommendation,
because I have another couch and some seating over here, like a recliner and a couch, and they wouldn't be able to see it.
Or if they did, it would have that warped, like not quite.
Is that the way those curved TVs work?
Because if it is, that seems like a bad idea.
They have a focal point, right, that you need to be in the center of that focal point.
Otherwise, you're looking, you can see the curve, and it's kind of off-putting.
Like, I've got my curved monitor here,
and if I turn it sideways, it's like,
oh, that doesn't look right at all.
Or if you're off to the side or something like that.
So you definitely want to, I prefer the flat screen.
A place that Chiz and I rented one time in Colorado
had a curved, like, 65-inch,
and as long as you sat right in front of it,
it was excellent. But if you sat over in, like, the lovese long as you sat right in front of it it was
excellent but if you sat over in like the love seat or the chair off to the side it was like
ah shit I this is an ideal I don't I don't like this at all you can you can totally see the
but I have company over I don't want to have to like race to a specific seat like I called
right here it's the only spot in the house you have a 72 inch TV right so when you see like a
55 in someone's house
you're just like
why am I even wasting my time right
they don't prioritize television
the way I do
that's absolutely true and I like that every time
someone comes over to my house and they see it
they're like what the fuck
wow what the hell is that
the guys were moving it the other day and they're like like, what do you got, Dead Hooker in here?
This thing's like 140 pounds.
I'm like, yeah, oh, yeah.
How did you even get it in here?
I had to get help.
That's the other thing about a big TV like that.
If you've got a 55-inch or maybe even a 65-inch, I don't know, one man can handle this thing.
But my TV is it's
impossible for one human being to do it it's just it's so awkward it's too unwieldy and it's quite
heavy it's it's literally 125 130 pounds or something like that this is going to be the first
tv that's so cumbersome that i'm not able to move it myself. Yeah. Which is, it feels like a step up in life, you know? You've arrived now.
Yeah, yeah. I've arrived.
I'm to the point of conscripting friends
to get a nice, you know, and of course I
also get like the nice little satisfaction, of course,
like I know where all my friends live. I go to their houses
or their apartments or condos, whatever.
This is going to be barn on the nicest fucking
TV of anyone. In your circle.
And so when there's, where are we watching football?
Fucking Taylor's house. Where are we watching football? Fucking Taylor's house.
Where are we doing this? Well, if it has anything
to do with viewing, we'll do it at Taylor's.
I already have a nice sound bar and surround sound system
that's going to be very neat.
We've had people come to my house because
this Game of Thrones is going to be a big one.
Let's see it at Woody's house.
I don't have a big TV, but I have a projector.
Even as cool as... I think it's a big TV, but I have a projector. Yeah. So, and, you know, even as cool as...
It's even better.
Yeah, I think it's 109 inches.
But the audio in that room is really well done.
God, that's just bananas.
109 inches.
So...
Did you ever go watch, like, just, like, you know, a news station in there?
So it's just like Jake Tapper, like, and in other news today!
It gets wasted, wasted.
You know, like when I'm sitting, I'm like, let's put on Lord of the Rings.
Let's put on Game of Thrones, like something that rocks, something that involves cannons and ships.
Or like that's what I like to watch on that screen.
My wife, Star Trek, old Star Trek in four by three.
I was like, what are we even doing here?
I thought you were going gonna say like cake boss or
something oh yes yeah my son loves all the cake shows um yeah it's just it's i don't know yeah
you want to use it for like people people overuse the word epic but you want to use it for things
that are literally epic yes like lord of the rings or you know game, Game of Thrones or Gladiator.
I just, exactly what I was thinking.
That's a movie I haven't seen in a while.
Saving Private Ryan.
Oh, The Patriot.
Oh, yeah.
The Patriot's good.
The Patriot has really good surround sound when the cannonballs are going by and stuff.
It's zoop, zoop.
Yeah, I was thinking of both of those.
Gladiator's an excellent fucking movie.
I don't know why I got fuzzy there for a second.
It is good.
Yeah, there we go like you go back and watch almost any mel gibson movie like that he was
in charge of like that you understand why hollywood was like honestly most a lot of us
are jewish and he said a lot he doesn't care for us but god damn he knows how to make some money
with these films yeah he didn't do gladiator he did do patriot you know he did the patriot i love that
scene in patriot where he go where like he they kill his son right right there and then him and
his remaining two sons who are like i don't know 13 and 15 or something go to rescue the older son
and they're like hiding in those trees and they ambush the british it i love that fucking scene
it's so good um Is that towards the end?
Very beginning, pretty much.
Well, it's a very long movie, so when I say very beginning, I mean like 30 minutes in.
Yeah, pretty much.
Yeah.
They've taken Tristan, I believe, who was the actor?
It was the guy who played the Joker.
Heath Ledger.
Heath Ledger, yeah.
They've got him all tied up, and they've got like, I i don't know a dozen redcoats maybe maybe 15 or so and they're like
going along down and they ambush them from a from a high position and they're and he's just like
behind that tree with his musket lord make me fast and accurate like it turns around like kills the
main one and then the little and the kids are shooting too, and every time the British
try to turn their guns on the kids, Mel Gibson
jumps out and he goes,
and then, of course,
finally, he comes down, and it's
fucking the blade in one hand,
and the tomahawk in the other.
And he fucking throws the tomahawk,
kills the guy who's holding Tristan hostage,
and then there's just one left, and he's like,
I give up, I give up left and he's like oh oh i give up i give up he's like no he like pulls the tomahawk out of that guy's head and like runs the guy down and chops him into pulp it's the title of that riverbed i
remember because we watched that movie like sophomore year of high school or something in
like a history class.
Up until then, it's not that really ridiculous of a movie as far as violence.
I remember sitting there in class
with my teacher over there on his PC
or whatever. Mel Gibson's just
murdering this red coat. I'm like,
I don't know what I'm learning.
I don't think
any of this has been historical.
No, none of it is.
There was no Fort Wilderness.
You know what was great?
So my friend's mom, so I'm like a senior in high school,
and she treated us like we were kindergartners,
which was actually kind of welcome.
She called us her sweet dumplings.
She fed us all the time.
She literally referred to her son who
we called jaws her beautiful baby boy all the way through high school she was just the most like
infinite very infantizing you guys know that infantilizing infantilizing is what i'm searching
for and uh and you know i don't know it was nice anyway i had seen dances with wolves and she
hadn't and i was dude, it's great.
And we're going to watch it with my buddy's mom because everyone loved Dances with Wolves.
It's not until you see it with someone like that that you realize how filthy that movie is, right?
She's just aghast at the gore.
And I think there's sex in it.
And, you know, like the violence ramps up.
And it's like, oh, oh my god i had a similar
experience like um we got a rock band right rock band the the game and uh you know the pka dan was
staying with us and whatever and and i thought it was fun rock band like i played it before it was
no big deal it's not until you hear your like 11 year old daughter singing about her sticky sweet thighs
that you realize how dirty all these songs are it's like oh my god i never thought about that
yeah there was nothing more uncomfortable than like accidentally recommending of a movie or
something or tv show at a friend's house when like the parents were present. So when I was, I guess, 16,
when Borat came out,
I saw that in theaters with my dad.
And we both laughed our asses off,
thought it was hilarious.
And of course, I went to a religious school,
and so some of my friend's parents were really religious.
And so I went over to my buddy's house
six, seven months later,
whenever it came out on DVD,
and I was like, oh, you know what know we should go to blockbuster and rent borat and they were and they were and his parents
were like i don't know i heard that was risky i'm like oh my dad took me to see it we were laughing
the whole time and he's like all right well taylor elliot go go get it and bring it back and we'll
all watch it and so he went uh had to actually bring one of his parents because he had to be 18 to rent it they they got it and we came back and we watched it and it was like
so soon like the the high of like showing someone something funny yeah like kept me going where i
was like they're gonna love it everybody's gonna get such a hoot and then like it started and like
uh he's like as soon as he said like my sister is a prostitute or whatever, I started remembering.
Number one prostitute in all of Kazakhstan.
As soon as, like, I saw that, it, like, triggered in my head.
And I'm, like, oh, no.
And, like, the scene of that fat guy and him running naked through the hotel.
And I'm, like, oh, shit, I'm going to have to tactically plan, like, six different bathroom breaks throughout this movie because this is going to be so uncomfortable.
And it literally was. it was so fucking uncomfortable like maybe 40 minutes in uh
my friend's mom just got up and laughed and a little bit later uh his dad got up and left and
like in a semi-joking but not really joking way was like last time we take a recommendation from
you taylor and like yeah right went upstairs and uh after that his that wasn't even a big deal it was a fucking movie but his
parents apparently thought it was a bad influence we probably were though that's just because of
the movie but outside the movie were you not a bad influence on this guy probably not i mean mayhaps
i remember like i was i was watching pulp fiction at my parents' house when I was maybe 16 or 17,
and my mom had never seen it before.
And she has to walk in right as they're having the conversation where he's like,
hey, eating a bitch's pussy and rubbing her feet are two completely fucking different things.
He's like, I don't know, but they're in the same ballpark.
No, sticking your tongue in the holiest of holes.
What movie is this?
I remember all this.
Pulp Fiction.
Oh, okay, yeah.
She's like, what are you watching?
And I'm like, what?
It gets better.
They're about to blow a guy away over some burgers, over some breakfast burgers.
This is some good shit.
Like, just stick with it here for a second.
I'm out of here.
She was like not into that at all.
Dances with Wolves, you mentioned that.
I can't re-watch that.
It's so goddamn sad. When they kill his wolf,
oh,
when they kill his wolf,
I cried and cried. The wolf
literally gives his life to
save him.
It's so sad. I can't re-watch
Dances with Wolves. I've never seen that movie.
I probably should. The, The Wolf Dies.
Well, The Wolf Dies
at some point. It came out in the 90s, so it's
okay. Dude, it's a...
You know, it would have died by now anyway.
It's an excellent fucking movie.
It really is. So, let me just give you
the cliff notes of how
things get started. Kevin Costner is
a Civil War soldier who's been
wounded in the leg. And he's is a Civil War soldier who's been wounded in the leg,
and he's in this Civil War field hospital, and the doctor's like, he's like, I'm going to have
to saw that leg off, but I got to go get a drink. I've sawed off so many legs today, I'm tuckered.
I'll be right back with you. And Kevin Costner's sitting there on the bed, and he looks over at a pile of legs that have already been cut off.
And then he looks over at a soldier walking along on crutches without a leg, and he's like, no.
And so he incredibly painfully pulls his rubber boot back over his wounded foot, mounts a horse.
And the situation of the battle is that the north and south are at like a
stalemate thank you nobody's moving they're both behind these rows of fences and they're just kind
of shooting back and forth and all of a sudden you see costner in the center of all of them
riding the horse and he just puts his hands back you know like like straight back in the air like
riding the horse like kill me kill me and like the the southerners start shooting at him but
then they just stop you know they're they're so like taken aback by this guy that they that they're
just like look at him he's got no fear and then like this rallies all the northerners up and they
all let's go help him and they all charge the the southerners who many of them have unloaded their guns
and haven't bothered to reload because they're taken aback by Costner.
And it wins the battle.
And so the general comes over, and he's like,
that's the bravest or the craziest thing I've ever seen in my life.
I'm going to get my doctor to look at you.
Saves the foot, and he's like, I'll station you anywhere you want to look at you saves the foot and he's like I'll station you
anywhere you want to go what would you like to do
and so he chooses to go out west
to some outpost like away from
the war and he gets
out there and he ends up like dealing with
Indians and stuff and he makes friends with
the Indians and it's
an epic movie it's like three hours
plus he practically becomes an Indian
he practically becomes an Indian. He practically becomes an Indian.
He wins their trust over.
It's very good.
There's a couple of sad scenes.
It's very well acted all the way through.
There's a lot of heartbreak.
I always feel bad when they're killing that one guy.
And he's like, don't kill my mule.
Don't hurt my mule.
killing that one guy and he's like don't kill my mule don't hurt my mule and isn't this the same movie that like has the same plot as avatar and the smurfs a little bit yeah yeah yeah but this
was before all those i don't see the avatar link where you like you infiltrate a group like the
indians and then you're known known like you become trusted by them.
I see it now.
I feel like that's kind of a common story, right?
That's the plot of WoodyCraftFactions.
Pretend to be your friend for six
weeks, you let me in your place and I steal all your shit.
I'm glad you mentioned that.
I've been watching this guy's videos.
They're a couple years old now his his his uh youtube is daniel from sl or daniel sl like the letters sl
or something like that and he plays rust and i've never seen anything about rust he
fucks with people he is the biggest troll of all time he pretends like he's their friend
and then he just completely
ruins their gaming experience. It's so funny. This guy's like, hey, I'm going to log out.
I'll be right back. I'm Farmer John, by the way. And he's like, oh, cool. Are you friendly? Yeah,
I'm friendly. Yeah, me too. And so the guy logs out, and he sees where the guy logged out from.
So when the guy logs back in, he will appear at this position. He knows where he's going to be.
So he puts bear traps in that position, and he waits. And when the guy logs back in he will appear at this position he knows where he's going to be so he puts bear traps in that position and he waits and when the guy logs back in he's like
what the hell what's happened to me my legs are broken you you did this to me didn't you and he's
like no i didn't some other guy knocked me out and and then he put those bear trips traps in there
he's like no you did this you did this to. And now I'm locked in this room with my legs
broken. I can't even...
What am I going to do?
He's trolling. He's like, you want some rice?
And the guy gives the guy a bag of rice.
And the guy's like, no!
I don't want your rice. My legs
are broken, you twat.
And some other random guy walks along
and he's like, what happened here?
And the guy's like, it's got here he trapped me, and he broke my legs.
He's evil.
And Daniel's like, no, that's not true.
This guy's the bad guy.
He attacked me, and I broke his legs, and now he's lying.
And the guy's like, I don't know.
This Daniel guy seems to be making a lot of sense.
I think I believe him.
And the other guy's like, oh, you fucking idiot.
You fucking idiot.
He's going to kill you in some horrible, sad way you just wait and he's like crawling he's
crawling toward a cliff and just before he rolls off the cliff and commits suicide because that's
all he can do he's just like he's gonna get you you fucking dummy he's gonna get you you wait he befriends this one guy and and like the guy thinks that they're like
buddies and they're like hiding in a house and daniel's like shooting his gun off he's just
randomly in the corner and the guy's like hey do you hear those shots was that you he's like
no it wasn't me oh shit we're pinned and like it's hit it's daniel's house so he has control
over the locks so he's just like pulls up a menu and he's like lock lock oh they've locked us in it's a hacker he's
he's like stabbing the walls he's like oh did you hit that wall no it wasn't me he's like running
around in the other room oh they're outside they're outside the walls oh it's definitely a
hacker and and it comes up on the screen this is day one and like like day like, day two comes around, and they're, like, traveling together.
And he's like, you have any water?
And he's like, yeah, yeah, here's some water.
And he's put bleach in the water, of course.
And the guy's like, oh, I have a funny taste in my mouth now, and everything's blurry.
I guess it says that on his screen.
He's like, did you find this water?
He's like, yeah, yeah, I found it.
He's like, oh, no, I've been poisoned.
I've got to make myself throw up. And he's like, like, vomiting. he's like oh no i've been poisoned i gotta make myself throw up
and he's like like this is a game mechanic and rust yes this is a really funny game like yes
this is just it's just called rust rust yeah it's it's um if you want to see like um i haven't even
described it yet but the really funny one just search the rust experience and it's from daniel
it's either daniel sl or daniel from sl uh i'm not sure but it's the, and it's from Daniel. It's either Daniel SL or Daniel from SL.
I'm not sure, but it's The Rust Experience.
It's fucking hilarious because he's trolling this guy so hard.
The guy gives him a bow and he's pretending he's brand new to the game.
This is a game where new players are at a massive disadvantage with loot and knowledge and stuff
because it's not the kind of game that takes you step by step and holds your hand.
It's like, what am I even doing? You you literally spawn in naked like your dick's hanging out out in this
wilderness and there are guys with guns in some cases and like armor and shit and and he's he
befriends this guy saying he's a new player and the guy's like yeah here's a bow and arrow and
he's and he's trying he's pretending like he doesn't know how to use it and he's just drawing
it and letting it down over and over he's's like, no, you hold right mouse.
Hold right mouse.
How do I know if I have the right mouse?
Right mouse, click.
And he's just like failing at it repeatedly over and over and over and over.
And the guy's just like losing his mind.
He's like, do you have a mouse?
He's like, dude, this is a $45 mouse.
This is no joke.
That's not even a lot for a gaming mouse.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't know.
It's like bottom tier mouse.
They go like $130, yeah.
Oh, even crazy, you know.
It's absurd.
He's very funny.
He's only got maybe eight videos.
I watched them all, though, in succession.
And they're very, very funny, the way he trolls these people in Rust.
It made me want to play Rust.
I'm probably not gonna,
but... Dude, the videos
I like, I don't think
anyone else likes.
There's a guy, Rainfall Projects, right?
He's outstanding.
If you were to watch his videos, you'd be like,
I wish this guy was my friend. He's so cool and handy
and whatever.
I'm sitting here thinking, I wish I had a broken irrigation buggy.
I'd love a project like that.
What's funny is...
Are there, like, seven views?
No, he does better.
Like, he has 22,000 subs, but his videos get, like, triple that in views.
Like, pretty good.
And I had a friend who literally
said that like he's like i watch him too i wish i had a broken irrigation buggy yeah i like the
blacksmithing channels a lot i i watch a lot of those i really enjoy watching projects yeah i i i
kind of want to do one of i wish i had someone to hold my hand and walk me through it like the
tempering and the hammering and the forging and all that um because they they make these knives
these blades and weapons out of all kinds of interesting things i saw a guy take a wrench
just a large like uh three quarters inch wrench and he kept the back end you know the circular
part i don't know what you call that uh the closed end of the wrench he kept that there
uh so you could hang this thing up but then he took the part that's like a, you know, a wire or whatever.
And he like bent it out into a tomahawk.
And, uh, he's like, wow, this is a really, you know, it was a craftsman wrench.
So it's good steel.
And now that it's hammered out, it's like, it's never going to break.
It's, it's really cool to see them make that stuff.
I've seen them take cable, like a strand of like one inch or one and a half inch cable. And because it's twisted, you know, as cable is with all the smaller, uh, wires
in there, uh, when you hammer it out, you can see that detail in the blade, uh, when they etch it.
So that's really cool. Um, I enjoy those, you know, and they, and sometimes the videos are
half an hour long of them hammering and hammering and hammering and hammering.
And I like seeing the guys who have – some of the guys are old school, right?
They're literally using a hammer and an anvil.
And some of them have the auto hammer that's just – you kind of feed your blade into a machine.
Even the auto hammer is old school, right?
It's like, hey, I happened upon this auto hammering machine.
It weighs 13 tons.
We came with a forklift
and it's really hard to get in here.
We laid new concrete on the floor
so it would have a place to sit.
It's a big thing to get one of these machines.
Yeah, man.
I enjoy those
because you get a finished product
that looks like,
I don't know,
it's like a $300 or $400 knife
that they often make out of just,
what many of them will do, they'll be like, I found this on the side of the road.
I found this piece of steel on the side of the road or like this piece of steel has been laying in my field.
What is the thing that holds a railroad tie down?
The railroad spike?
Yeah, yeah.
They'd be like, can you believe there was a perfectly good railroad spike on the side of the road?
I'm going to make a knife out of it and then it just
begins you know
I've made knives out of those before
but I
and I enjoy the
fantasy of
pretending like one day I'll learn how to do that
where some guy's like oh yeah this is
you know type 68 steel
which means I can temper it at XY flame
I'll take it right back to my forgery.
I've already, I actually pre-carved a handle for this, wouldn't you know it?
And it's like, like, God damn it.
Like, how are you this prepared in what is ostensibly a hobby?
You know, you just find this and you're hammering it out.
Like, it's all, it's like a more advanced, but equally satisfying version of primitive technology.
Or not quite as satisfying as primitive technologies.
Because that guy, like, like, he builds a forge to build his shit
that he uses to collect things to build what he's actually trying to build
in the video, you know?
It's out of control.
Do you still watch primitive technology?
Oh, yeah.
Every time one comes out, I watch it.
He moved.
I was like, no way.
You have, like, 1,000 man hours into that hut and the nearby forge.
You have a hammer hammer he has an auto
hammer as the water goes by the hammer starts hammering and i'm like oh my god you like you
just left all that behind but he did yeah someone will discover that and they'll be like what the
my theory is that's what happened my theory is someone discovered his old location and he moved
to get private again.
I was thinking that someone, now that he's like, maybe he sold the property and someone discovers that and they're like, 911?
Yes.
I believe there are some aboriginal people living in my property.
You've got to see this shit.
You've got to see this shit.
I'm worried they're going to come scalp me.
I didn't know they were this advanced yeah man speaking of aboriginal people i so i play uh pub g with like a really
diverse group of people i mean they're all white oh yeah now well wait wait you do play with
they're not diverse she's some sort of dirty ethnic i don't know what but yeah he's spanish
spanish diversity among white folks it's's true. It's not true.
I play with some big mechs.
He's Mexican and everything, but no blacks.
No, there's a black guy.
There's a black guy I play with, but that's not true.
He won't name him.
He's not going to name him.
Big black.
Ted the black guy, we call him.
Hey, get over here, blackie.
Big Mechs' avatar, his his character was a black man and we
literally made him change it we were like come on we're all blonde girls like like like this is not
this is not a porno we're shooting here we're like like you gotta become a you gotta become
either a red-headed girl or blonde girl with a ponytail it's one or the other that's what we do
here like we're all cute chicks uh we're
pretending like we're some sort of girl squad so you got to get on board with that but no i was
talking to the guy from australia last night he's a really cool guy uh just rohan i've said his name
now i can't talk about the racist things he said damn it that's okay nobody knows who rogan is
okay so he um he was talking about the aboriginal people in australia i was suggesting to him that
he watched quigley down under because it's you know it's based in his country and he mentioned
he liked america and western movies and stuff i was like oh man there's a western movie made
about australia and you know the aboriginals are kind of key key in that movie and it's got the
guy who played snape in harry potter i like guy. I can't think of his name right now.
But he's like, ah, those people, if you can call them that.
They're not really people.
I mean, do you ever look at them?
They're so –
You've seen them?
Yeah.
He's like, they're so black.
He's like, they look like cave people.
They look like Neanderthals or something.
It's like they haven't evolved over the last 50,000 years.
He's like, you know what they do? They come into town and they steal gasoline. And if they can't steal it
from the gas station, they siphon it out of your car. I was like, what are they doing with it?
He's like, they're huffing it. They're huffing it to get high. They steal your gasoline and they
huff it. They're all criminals and sneaks and they're not even real people.
They didn't used to be real people
under the law, but the liberals came in.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
And I was just like,
Jesus Christ.
This guy.
You mentioned the Avatar.
They steal gasoline just to huff it? What a waste.
On WoodyCraft, there was a group of people.
We had these forums, and the forums were really active
because it was like half the game is social, right?
That was like a big part of what was going on.
A lot of people changed their avatars to black people,
and black people wearing crowns or big, thick necklaces.
And I'm really stuck because I'm like what
level of censorship do I want to enforce
am I racist
for making them change
for not allowing black avatars
or are they racist for using
black avatars
it's not in my opinion it's not your
responsibility to govern that
that's what we end up doing nothing
to do it however you want because you know what happens if you say hey i don't like when you put a crown on and have big
gaudy chains or whatever and make your avatar a black cube like then everybody's gonna want to do
that and nothing
you know or they'll go actually yeah like you're probably right just find another way but it like also like you try to make it a
place where people don't feel if you were to walk into a place and everyone was racist you know
dropping n-bombs and wearing crowns and thick like it was it felt like they were mocking a culture
yeah and that's not cool yeah well they were probably uh but speaking of mocking a culture. That's not cool. Well, they were, probably.
So speaking of mocking a culture,
have you been on VRChat?
I know you haven't. Have you watched any videos of VRChat? Of course you haven't.
Let's watch one real quick, and I'll show
you how absurd VRChat
is. What is VRChat?
VRChat is where
you put your
vibe on, you go into this open world
kind of thing.
And everybody's kind of walking around.
You know? And this is
what's happening over there, apparently.
This is what people are up to
over in VR chat.
Alright, I'm queued up at zero whenever you guys
are ready. Same. Three, two,
one,
play.
You don't know the way do you know the way
what is happening here i don't understand these guys are pretending like they are This is my new home. We cannot escape together.
I don't understand.
We are only weak. No, we are only weak.
We are only weak.
We are only weak.
We are only weak.
We are only weak.
So we didn't check the...
Yeah.
We didn't check the...
We didn't check the...
We didn't check the...
Why does this look so shit? This shows blood. Action is coming! I don't understand this generation.
I don't understand this generation.
Welcome to old age, Taylor.
First you're telling your stories about Blockbuster, and now you don't understand the kids' videos.
I will teach you the way.
I will teach you the way.
Do you know the way?
Why is that guy a can of beans?
Do you know the way?
Do you know the way?
You need Ebola to know the way.
I'm stuck.
This looks like an immense How are they choosing the stupidest
avatars?
They go up to the girl and they go
They're trying to look up skirts
And they're accumulating more and more followers I guess They're trying to look up skirts.
And they're accumulating more and more followers, I guess.
I would say if I was in this game, I would instantly become a hedgehog and start working
on my African accent.
They're smelling her crotch.
And you know what?
That's probably a dude. This is awful.
How does this have 5.4 million views?
And it has 212,000 likes and only 1,000 dislikes?
That should be inverted.
They're just clicking their tongues for the last two minutes.
And some of this audio is abusive.
I am, at this point, just about determined,
like from a discipline motivation standpoint, to endure to the end of the video.
I guarantee you the ending will suck. There's not gonna be a crescendo.
I don't think they put together a three-part like introduction, body, and climax on this video.
They didn't tell us what they were gonna say. Tell us, and then tell us what they told us.
You know what?
Like there's no intro, body, outro.
They're not even creative.
Go outside!
Feel outside!
Taylor, that's the perfect response.
Do you know the way?
Get a girlfriend!
Meet someone! I would rather click at people on the internet.
I would rather pretend to lick the pussy of a woman who is actually a man who is so sad
in a game
in order to get attention.
I like it.
I bet if you broke it down,
I bet there are more male
players of video games with female avatars
than there are female players with female
avatars. And I bet it's
not even close.
But in this, you can hear their voice, of course.
There are plenty of...
Girls play that. There's lots of girls in there
to be fair. Actual girls.
They were
saying, you do not know Dewey
so loudly and frequently
clicking their tongues i never heard the girl quote unquote say anything but like uh there are
definitely lots of females playing vr chat what do you get uh so you've clearly done vr chat what
what do you what what do you do you socialize man you know you go around talk to people meet people
you're walking around in this little world. What's your avatar?
Whatever you want it to be. No, what's your avatar?
I don't play the game.
I don't play that game. No. I mean, are
there points that you can get?
Is there a score? I don't think so.
Then it's not a game. It's a social experience.
It's like Tinder, but you don't meet anyone.
Oh, it's like Tinder, but you get
clicked at by fake applicants.
And there is a zero percent chance of getting
oh it's full it's above zero not far above but
half of a tenth of a percent yeah and then you know there's a 10 chance that the guy will be a
cop yeah yeah this uh i'm gonna wait for vr to get another generation or two down the road and then I'll
take another peek at it because this is
what people are doing if they're going around
in what appear to be MS Paint
renditions of Sonic
and a can of beans
where the label isn't even correctly
sized on the beans it says like
the bottom half of bushes
you know like
this is so stupid
yeah the new generation coming the the new i
think i think vibes releasing a new one uh pretty soon maybe better resolution and a wireless feature
so you think it's which no what's the good one vive right yeah and they're releasing a new one
yeah now did i hear oculus released a new one am i crazy i don't really follow it that closely to
be honest i don't know facebook owns it right i think so you know they're wasting it
maybe um you know i we talked about this before but like the real issue is like the the number of
headsets out there it's when you compare like the cost of making a triple a pc game to you know all
of the customers that are available, your customer base,
is massive. It's X million of people.
But with the Vive, it's like
whatever, 600,000 people?
A million people maybe now?
I really don't know.
But even if you sold a copy of your game
to every one of those people, you don't get
to the budget of a game like GTA,
which was like a quarter billion dollars.
Right?
You gotta have Valve, you know, really funding the thing, you know, hoping
that it's going to be big in the future.
They got to get the cost of the headsets down.
You know, it's a peripheral that's $600.
And that's only half of it, right?
Because you need like a 1080.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
It's a peripheral that's $600.
You know, you got'm saying it's peripheral that's 600 you know you gotta it's it's uh it's expensive and you definitely need a 1080 to to like run most
of the stuff um well you know it seemed like the 1180 should be out soon am i crazy the 1080 ti is
so fucking expensive like i'm i'm looking at building kitty a PC right now, and I was considering maybe giving her my PC
and building myself a 1080 Ti setup with an i7-8700K.
You're going to give her the one that you just completed?
Maybe.
That's like a year ago, though, right?
Yeah, like a year ago.
I was looking at the i9 processors, and that seems kind of unnecessary,
unless you want to do streaming on the same machine you're gaming on, I guess.
But I think it's...
I don't want to get this wrong.
18 fucking cores?
Is that right?
I mean, I need a lot.
Like, maybe that would make sense.
The one thing I do every once in a blue moon, record, stream, and watch videos at the same time.
Which apparently ruins everything on this machine.
A fucking i9 processor is pretty...
You just got quiet.
Did he get quiet to you too?
Yeah, he got quiet to me.
Oh.
Too quiet.
Do you know the way to turn your volume up?
That's funnier than that whole fucking video.
Do you know the way?
Now you look like you're going to be like,
Well, I don't necessarily regret the crime,
but if I were to do it again, I'd do it differently.
They would tell me that they were going to show me the way of the Lord.
And then he pulled his penis out.
Why is your camera not focused?
By that point, I was sold.
Try to, like, fix it better.
Yeah, yeah.
Like, better or faster.
Yeah, okay.
Now it's...
All right.
Have you tried being more competent?
I can't see what's happening.
I would love it if that worked.
But actually, he's a little censored.
That's weird.
Well, you're not quiet to me anymore.
At first, there was only one priest, but later on, more joined.
Dude, did you see a priest just came out?
A priest?
A pastor?
As a pedophile?
I was on Fox News, actually.
Shucks, I'm looking for it.
He's a pedophile.
Memphis pastor gets standing ovation
after acknowledging sexual incident with teen.
I'm not sure if this person is tied in
with Weinstein or something like that.
But anyway, he said he was going to drive her home.
Instead of driving her home, he drove her to like an isolated dirt road and told her to suck his dick and take her shirt off.
What?
Yeah.
When was this?
1998.
Oh, so he waited, you know well 20 years just to be sure she wrote him a letter and said uh you know like hey do you remember that time you said you were
like you were my pastor and you were going to take me home and instead you drove me to a
like deserted area and made me suck your dick and take my top off? And it appears he does remember
because he told the story
to his congregation and they gave him
a standing ovation.
Did he tell it
in that way?
Well, I thought, you know,
he admitted to having a sexual...
She was 17.
He admitted to having a sexual incident
with a female high school senior in the church.
And he took every step to respond in a biblical way.
Tennessee.
Man, well, maybe he bamboozled them when you really get your crowd hyped up.
Who loves the Lord?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Who's going to do what they can this week to show the Lord that you're working for him?
You're putting feelings out there. You are the salt of the earth like that kind of shit like yeah
who forgives me for making that little girl suck my dick in 1998
yeah it's like all right no take these back she's you know on that you forgive me but yeah that's a
what a fucking creep ah okay so what happened was she i said she was tied in with wines or something i was wrong
she heard about the matt lauer thing and thought i guess me too and um she wrote a letter to this
guy and said do you remember the night you were supposed to drive me home from church
and instead you drove me to a deserted back road and sexually assaulted me
and uh he begged her to keep it a secret and she didn't and now
he's admitted that it's true did she ever get home clearly yeah right she didn't mention that
i bet he did drive her home as well and she was ungrateful uh-huh get out of my car you come
slut you can jog it up the rest of the way dude there was a girl in my high school. I won't say her name, but she was regarded as what they called a total hose monster, right?
And yeah.
A hose monster.
A hose monster, yeah.
Wait a second.
That was her reputation, that she was a total hose monster.
And she needed a ride home.
And it was like a 20-minute drive or something.
Like it wasn't a real trivial thing.
But I was like, man, apparently this girl sucks dick all the time so i'll give it a go no
ducks dick sucking happened whatsoever i don't know what young woody was thinking like like just
out of a sense of appreciation she would start blowing out no you gotta pull it out well i i
didn't know i didn't know and uh, you ever seen pubes like this?
That's right.
Have you ever seen pubes like this?
A little on each side.
Why don't you get a closer look?
You feel a little tired?
Maybe you put your head in my lap.
Yeah, I drove her home hoping she would just spontaneously come up with the idea.
Like, well, you know, I don't have gas money, so I guess I should suck you off.
And that didn't come up.
It is very rare that the just take your dick out strategy pans out.
But it's not a 0% success rate, so it's still viable.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Because a lot of girls read between the lines.
And they go, oh, it's probably not sweaty and needs to air out probably once it sucked clearly yeah and apparently this pastor knew that rule and took advantage of
it and now incorporating it into the beatitudes or whatever the fuck he's talking about on his
sunday sermon they should probably uh bring up the assistant pastor and get him out of there. Right? I wonder what the gap
is, like, in terms of, like, sexual
activity between a girl who's
regarded as a total hose monster
and another girl who maybe just
sucks as much dick
but apparently not asshole's
dicks. It depends on the
situation, right? Because, like, I remember
there was a girl in school, like, and she
you know, she had fucked a bunch of guys and once right so hose monster and there was
another girl who like uh um um like like she invited some guys her house and they were like
all right well we're gonna go and she was like oh and she just took her top off
you know like like that cool girl right right well she sounds great yeah see also it depends especially in like
a high school level it's not even you know 100 the actual sexual activity that's going on it's
what what the girls decide they're going to do to turn one of the girls into a whore you know
because most high school people have had sexual experiences and you know the big group of girls that hang out together that are you know the popular the prettier
ones they can turn on any one of them and be like samantha is a whore like she actually is let's
like spread that around a bit and then before you know it even if samantha's sucked less dick than
you know susan or whatever over there or monica like she's the quote whore and it's just uh an accepted thing you know like
the way uh uh i was gonna use a really bad example because i'm like yeah you know like the way you
knew some kids in high school were gay even though they never said that you were gay so everybody
called them gay and then it turns out they're gay like you know so that that example doesn't work
but yeah it i bet the the difference in dick isn't as much as you think.
Yeah.
I also wonder, there were a couple guys in my high school that seemed gay, right?
They were just really effeminate.
And I never found out if they were actually gay, but now I'm curious again.
I find out every so often.
I never saw him actually suck a dick.
But at the talent show, he's saying sang why must I be a teenager in love
It was so gay
He's singing
He did do that
In a sequined skirt
Yeah he was twirling a baton
Singing it's raining men
But I'm not sure
I'm not sure
I remember he sang that he wasn't in my year
and it was like well uh two two things to note here one he's really good two this is super gay
there were two people i suspected of being gay in high school because like i've just i've described
our shower situation multiple multiple times and nobody ever got an erection in the shower with a bunch of other men you're in there to
clean like even at the age when it's like all it took was a little like puff of air to get you
going like nothing ever happened except for these two guys these two guys who consistently every
time they would come into the bathroom or into the shower
like you'd see them walking around and you'd see they just had you know their high school boners
right there just raging and ready to go and they'd stand there and shower as though they didn't
and and they were both already like slightly odd guys and so like they wouldn't be taught
because usually like you're talking to your friends in the shower and everything they'd
do it do it quietly and like be on their own but it was like god that that is so weird like you'd think
like get a boner once in the shower you know okay you had an odd morning or something i don't know
what's going on with you but no judgment if every fucking time you get in the shower with a bunch of
other of your classmates who are male you you are probably gay and the boner didn't end in the shower with a bunch of other of your classmates who are male, you, you are probably gay.
And the boner didn't end in the shower.
Like he'd like walk out and you'd be like near your locker and you're like,
Oh,
boner Robbie's coming through.
All right.
Like,
hang a towel on it.
Yeah.
Hang a towel.
It was like,
God,
that.
Have I told you my,
have I told the story on the show of the,
my friend who I thought was gay?
Yes. Oh yes. And he's not gay. the story is great yeah and you asked i guess i told it was gay yeah dude i thought you were gay yeah why
would you think i was gay uh yeah mark is great but not gay did you guys have any uh gay deniers
in your high school where like everybody would kind of know they were gay, but they'd like have like pretend girlfriends and shit?
No.
I don't think so.
No?
Nobody with a beard?
There was this one kid a year or two, maybe just a year below me.
I don't remember.
But he was like one of the arguments that made it clear because obviously I went to a religious school.
They'd be like, you know, gay is a sin.
Like, I'm like, that guy's not sinning.
That guy is as gay as the day is long.
Nobody chooses to act in the way this limp-wristed,
you know, skipping fairy kind of guy does.
Nobody acts like that.
And he went through like multiple girlfriends.
He only ever hung out with girls.
And the relationships that they had,
it wasn't like
when you'd see in high school you know like on one of those couches in the common room like a
boyfriend with his girl arm around his girlfriend or something it would be like him like sitting
like legs together like prissy like shooting the shit like gossiping with his girlfriends and then
like when the other girls came around like bring them all over and they'd all gossip and it was
and then a couple years ago i find that someone asked me do you remember uh do you remember
richard from high school?
I'm like, oh, yeah, the gay guy.
And he goes, you know what?
He is gay.
He's gay now.
It's like, no, he's been gay the whole time.
He's been gay the whole time.
I wonder what the girls think, though.
They're like, yeah, Richard, he's not threatening and fun to hang out with, so why not date him?
What are they thinking?
Maybe.
I don't know.
so why not date him?
What are they thinking?
Maybe.
I don't know.
Like, I think part of it is that girls want to go out with, you know,
popular guys who have standing.
And part of what makes a guy popular and have standing in high school is his perception among the girls in the grade, you know?
And so if you're a gay guy, all the girls love you,
which in turn boosts your social value.
And so one girl then is going to go, okay, I can't get one of the jock guys,
but I can get this other socially valuable guy.
Maybe that's kind of it.
I don't know.
Wow.
Taylor's really figured out the dating economy of high school.
The high school dating economy.
Shocking.
Yep.
Shocking indeed.
Have you guys – I've been super, super healthy eating recently in the last week or so.
And I'm waiting for the feeling of health to kick in.
Like, I've been forcing myself to eat giant salads and, like, carrot sticks and broccoli.
I went to TGI fucking Fridays today with a couple people from work for lunch, and I made myself get
a turkey burger with no cheese
and the side was broccoli
because it was only like 680
calories and plenty of protein.
At the end of the meal, though, I was like,
I feel pretty good about myself.
I don't feel guilty. I feel good.
I feel like I didn't throw it, because I could have
had a double bacon cheeseburger with fries
and eaten 1,600 calories that meal and not even felt like it and thrown the whole day away.
I've been looking into using catering services to deliver my food.
Instead of just getting one meal, order for 20 people.
Get enough for several days.
Last night I ordered from this barbecue place, and I got the family meal.
It's four rolls, a pound of meat, two family-sized sides.
I ordered an extra side.
I didn't think two was going to be enough.
And, you know, Kitty ate some of it.
Just probably about as much as a child, right?
Yeah, exactly.
She used, like, the tiny plate, you know, the one that you could almost put a teacup on.
She was like, this is my portion, and I've got, like, the biggest plate in the one that you could almost put a teacup on. She was like, this is my portion.
I've got the biggest plate in the house just covered with meats and sauces.
What kind of barbecue?
I got pulled pork, smothered it in barbecue sauce,
and then I got potato salad, baked potato casserole, and baked beans.
Then I ate all four of the rolls because she didn't want them.
I ate all four of them.
I ordered a 32-ounce
sweet tea. Killed that.
Had a few orange sodas.
What's your weight at now?
I don't have a scale here, but my pants
fit pretty tight. That'll be a fun surprise for you when you buy one.
Yeah, right? I did put on
my skinny pants today, and they were pretty
tight, but my ass looked good
in them, so I was like, ah.
What are your skinny pants? What's the dimensions uh i think they're 30s uh so um i haven't worn 30s since i was 13
what size do you wear i wear 32 or 33 it depends like that kind of just depends on the the make
of the jean i wear 34 but they seem to be too big.
But I don't want to buy 32 because I don't want the ego hit if 34 fits better.
I'd rather have 34s that are too big.
That's where I am.
I just went to this paramotor thing, so I saw a lot of people I hadn't seen in a while,
and they're all praising me for how thin I am.
Yet I know in my heart I'm a piece of shit who hasn't really lost any extra weight in the last like six or eight weeks. Um, and then the whole time I'm there, I'm pretty much surviving
on restaurant food. So that comes with some guilt. Like it's hard to eat all restaurant food and
really hit your like, you know, healthy goals. But, uh, I'm back and I'm eating well now and
you know, we'll get back on track. I have, uh, I went to the grocery store yesterday, and this is what I'm eating tonight.
I got crab cakes, salmon cakes,
lobster macaroni and cheese, and deviled crabs.
Oh, that sounds good.
Yeah, yeah.
So tonight I'm going to eat all of that, actually.
I've got two crab cakes, a salmon cake,
my deviled crabs, and my lobster macaroni and cheese.
I'm going to eat that.
And then I predict – I also have some sushi.
I got a big platter of sushi from the grocery store because they, like, make sushi in the grocery store.
So I've got, like, two sushi rolls and, like, eight pieces of nigiri.
I'm going to get that down tonight.
Sounds really good.
It's going to be great.
I've been eating so much indian
food like indian food virtually every single day i've been eating curry i've been getting like uh
lamb vindaloo or like chicken tikka tikka masala oh i love that i i really really love it i get a
ton of naan bread with it i'm just dipping the naan bread in the i get it really hot and just
tears are just pouring down my face i can feel it burning in my belly but i just eat more and more and more i almost god your dinner sounds
so much fucking better than mine i'm gonna make turkey bacon maybe a couple eggs an enormous salad
of spinach with a little bit of light vinaigrette and uh probably a sweet potato apparently there's
something called chicken salt i I bought it off Amazon.
We're going to put that on the George Foreman chicken
and go wild.
See what's up with it.
See how it is.
See, and after the meals,
Woody and I will feel better.
I'm going to take a nap after my meal.
I have to.
Yeah, it's mandated.
I physically can't stay awake.
I'm going to hit the kettlebells
because it's Wednesday and I haven't.
Yeah, every time I eat one of those big
Indian platters I have
to take a nap there's no staying awake
after you eat that much chicken
and lamb and potatoes and
spicy rice
it's so god damn good my mouth's watering
right now as soon as we get done here
I'm going in there and eating something
I am as well.
Well, I think we're done.
All right.
PKN 177.