Painkiller Already - PKN #208

Episode Date: August 23, 2018

It's PKN time baby!

Painkiller Nearly, episode 208. Where are we starting, Kyle? We had a couple of weeks to talk about this. Well, I've got to say, I've seen Wings. I've been watching Wings streams. He's been streaming some Dark Souls and some other stuff and enjoying that. But he's saying that he's not going to get into the new Call of Duty. And at first I thought that was a really bad idea

because that's traditionally kind of where he's grown. And even though he rages at Call of Duty, I feel like people will come just because he's playing it and maybe he can turn some people around to you know just enjoying his content somehow and raging is the show he doesn't like part of that show but but yeah carry on yeah but then i watched shroud play uh i think it's black ops 4 i'm not positive because I'm just not into it, but I watched Shroud play Black Ops 4, the newest one, the beta, and it is so fucking fast-paced. It is...

It's as fast or faster than any COD. It's like Modern Warfare 3. Everybody's just flying around. Let me ask you this, though, because Shroud makes Rainbow Six look fast-paced. Shroud makes every game look fast-paced. The guy just charges at you and shoots you in the head.

Are you sure you're not looking at this through a distorted lens because it's Shroud? No, it seemed like the way to play. It seemed like that's what everyone else was doing as well. At first, he took some acclimating for him to get up to the speed it felt like that everybody was playing at. You've got this Batman

grappling hook thing, and maybe I'm wrong and it just has one charge or maybe it has infinite charges but with a cool down but you can shoot this thing onto any surface on the map like like a like a vertical surface just a wall in front of you and it'll just like repel you at super speed across the map so he's just jumping around hopping through every window conceivable there's no more of that likes of a skybox type scenario where you go up and you're like ah this is my skybox right i can i've got three fields of fire i can i can lay down and go prone if i want to it's hard to throw grenades in here and there's only one stair that like leads into this room like i can hold this down there's going to be none of that there's gonna be none of that there's no one entrance in

a claymore where you camp from a skybox. Because everybody's got a Batman rappel hook, right? And they're just going to zip right up through your window and stuff. And I started thinking, like, this is not Wings game. This isn't my game. This isn't my game. This is way too fast. This is like an arena-style shooter is what it looked like.

Yeah, but if he was willing to roll with the punches of getting furious over it being a different style of game, it could be even better, because it wouldn't be a staccato of he's actually doing okay, and then there's a blip of freaking out. It would be continuous. It would be more of the content that people actually go there to watch. They go because they want to watch him dislike the game and freak out.

But you've got to keep in mind, he's never acting. He's never playing it up. When the people are enjoying him the most, the way we're describing him, when they're enjoying his rage, they're enjoying his pain. He can't entertain you without cutting himself. They is if it's some other person, Kyle. As in Kyle, isn't the Pied Piper for all of these attacks. As you know, you got everybody with blindfolds on behind you

walking through the lane. Oh, I'm just leading people into different corners of the internet. Don't mind me. And then you skip out on your pan flute. It would be a shame if someone let a bunch of shitheads right into your stream. That's so true that's funny that was well put but wings redemption to a whole new audience that's all right like like he's always talking about how he made this youtuber and made that youtuber i'm

just trying to return the favor that's all i'm just trying to sense people's i was looking at it the wrong way you're doing this out of benevolence and i respect it yeah yes that's you're completely right uh so i'm like i'm i guess i'm only now realizing what i'm asking for right the wings of redemption that rages at call of duty also tweets pictures of hollow point bullets in some weird call it's been like a year or two now. Yeah, it's been about a year. Right? No. He had to have been... He did it several times. I feel like there was some...

Like one year ago. Yeah, I feel like the last COD, let COD come out. He might enjoy it through November. Let December roll around. The leaves fall off the trees. There'll be suicidal tweets if he plays that game. Yeah, he's got seasonal...

What is it? Affect disorder. Seasonal affective disorder. Sad. That and whale pox. I don't know what whale pox is, but I feel like it's not a thing. Scourge of turn-of-the-century sailors.

Only marine mammals and old-timey sailors get it. And wings. I was actually wondering what he was up to lately. So here's my thing. I like happy wings. We've had a lot of happy wings on PKA. I like angry wings. It's almost, I've come to realize,

I like every wings except low energy wings low energy wings is the worst wings and when he just comes on and says man i don't feel like being here start giving me money or i'll leave then that's the worst show he knows how to put on i think that's across the board for every streamer not even wings like people can tell when you're phoning it in like people are pretty good at that i would be okay with him phoning in it you know like like if he got up there and just pretended to be um ice poseidon right if wings of redemption did the arm thing and like started saying crazy things about his nut then even though he's playing it up and acting,

even though Wings isn't actually ice, I think it'd be a show we all enjoyed. There'd be highlight reels coming out of it. It'd be a blast, I think. Just not low energy. Because honestly, I think my favorite part is that he's delusional about certain things, like things like gaming skill or charisma, what have you.

And then every now and then on a live stream, he gets his like delusions corrected. And there's a moment where he has to reset the way he weighs himself in the world, figuratively speaking. Like you can like see the cognitive dissonance happening. Yeah. Of like, I thought I was like really good at this,

but it turns out I'm not good at Dominion on fucking whatever this map i don't know yeah god of war stream like like like like the god of war stream is a good example right you know i played he had built so much into i play every game on the hardest difficulty well now for a decade they trolled him so hard because look god of war on its hardest difficulty i wouldn't fuck with that either it's it looks excruciating. It's one of those games that made a really hard difficulty level for only the 1% of the 1%. And he's not that. He's a fan.

And so he lowered the difficulty to like, it's called Give Me Pain or something like that. It was something cool. Probably every other game's hard. Yeah. He lowered it to that. They're giving him so much shit. They're like, why aren't you playing on hard? He's like, I am playing on hard. I'm just not playing on the hardest. Like, he started running with that,

but they trolled him so bad that he's got a friend who's apparently really good at God of War, so he, like, mirror casts that guy's gameplay onto his livestream while holding a PlayStationstation controller he's not pretending he's playing he it's it's like he's like fantasizing he's playing almost like it's just for it's a game for just for him this whole holding of the playstation controller he's

imagining that he's as good as this guy almost he's visualizing like professional athletes do right there first you dream of success yeah first game seven look you visualize yourself succeeding and then you go physically do it so that's his live stream he's and it's the other guy playing and occasionally he brags about just how good he is at at god of war and it's just or he gives that guy advice on how to play and it's hilarious he's like oh yeah you want to get those those frosty motherfuckers first. There's like some ice demons or some shit. Yeah, get them, get them.

Yeah, power move, power move. It would be like if my wife was watching and giving advice. Oh yeah, get the people with the white frosty hair. Get the blue ones. No, the other blue ones. Get them, get them. Oh, get them. It's like an example of something not mattering

until someone made it matter. And off of Wings, to someone else who did that, Medeker released a new video last night, or the night before, on this dude named Mundane Matt, who I had no idea who he was or what he did,

but he was involved in Gamergate a while back. I don't know all the details on that either, but I know he was involved what he did okay but he had like he was involved in gamergate a while back uh i don't know all the details on that either but i know he was involved in it and he was like leading the charge in a lot of ways of like no false flagging of content because a lot of the feminists at the time were like flagging anything they didn't like and and you know getting things taken down and so that was a big to-do in uh their community uh i'm a skeptic community i'm not sure which one you put it under uh but that was a big deal in the gamergate thing and he denied for years that he flagged anyone and people would come up to him and be like hey you know i made a video

critiquing you and it got removed when it only had like 2300 views that's really odd he's like yeah i don't know you know people might be like false flagging on up you know to make it look like i'm doing it and he was in a live stream for like two hours with medicare and a couple other people and i watched like the snippet that medicare put in there and it was like over and over him doing like that scumbag lying to your face like guys i'm telling the truth i would not do this it's someone else trying to corner me someone trying to like get me for it i did not do this i didn't flag anyone i've never flagged anyone and one random dude on the chat was like oh, hey, I Just found this feature on YouTube that allows you to

Share what videos you flagged so here? We'll all share all the videos that we flagged and so everybody but this dude starts uploading Not even just screenshots so they can't edit it like screen shares so that you know it's not you know it's not like they're going to go into it yeah you'd have to go on the script code whatever the fuck it is and like mess with it and all of these people are doing it it takes two seconds for them to be like there it is yep see look i've flagged one person nine years ago because they stole a part of my video or something. I've never flagged anyone. He goes radio silent for 15 minutes where they're like, Matt,

Matt, send it to us. And for the first couple minutes, just send us a screenshot. And then they go, no, it's been long enough now. He's probably doctoring a screenshot right now. That's what he's doing. No, you share your screen with us. And he stays quiet for another 10 minutes. And then he comes back with the most bullshit.

I mean, I've been in a bad place for a while. I was considering self-harm like a year ago. And he shows all these videos that he's flagged. And keep in mind, if you go back and you click your flagged videos and you unflag it, that's removed. It doesn't show that you ever flagged it then. And so in those 15 minutes, he could have taken down a fuck ton more that he didn't even show and the cap on it all was there was this dude named like deso deso or something who made critique videos of this guy mundane matt and throughout the very beginning of the conversation medicare's like so you know who this deso guy is it's like no i have

no idea who he is i've never heard of this guy half a dozen do like 10 of his videos just like all going back and it's like his subs are tanking he's getting more hate than ever and it's like and a perfect example tie into what you were saying about wings it's like something that didn't really matter until you made it matter until you stood on the hill and we're like i don't flag and i despise those who do they're like yeah but you're flagging everybody yeah or the other day uh this this is a little bit back actually a couple months ago so i and forgive me if i get any of this wrong because i don't know the game dark souls very well but it seems to me that it's like a single player rpg that has multiplayer aspects where there's definitely one aspect um where a guy can like jump into your game and like duel you right

then and there when you've been like fighting through like single player dungeons for a long time and wings is like nobody better come try to raid me i'm the best there is i'm the rocky balboa of dark souls you better not bring like a any set you know some sort of game knowledge came into play you better not bring like a a green quarreler in here i like that he used a fictional over the hill character to describe who he was go on you better not bring a green quarreler character up in here or like a silver snake oh you bring a paladin you're fucking done son he's literally saying this and uh and all of a sudden somebody joins his game and just beats the shit out of him real quick just destroys him and so then he starts like signing out of the game every time someone joins he's like that's the only way you can get him to

stop that's the only way you can like cut like kick them you gotta show them that it's getting to you yeah he starts dashboarding basically and when he does that it like kicks their connection and he's able to like restart the game very quickly and continue on his single-player thing. He's like, why is everybody joining my games? And it's like, because you just threw out an open challenge to anyone playing the game on the planet to come and bring it. That's why.

It'd be like Woody being like, my compound is so well defended, none of you could breach it. No matter what weapons you brought, you couldn't storm my gates. Taylor, I don't like where we're headed with this. Why's it gotta be about me? That was just the first and silliest one I thought of.

But yeah, you don't wanna... Dark Souls is like one of the hardest games ever, right? I have a family living here, Taylor. No one's gonna... Try as you will. I welcome your attacks. no one's gonna try as you will you can't get us we're too strong i miss my mean dog we are all trained in martial arts yeah right even the dogs and the daughter

colin scale the facade grab the hidden gun on the roof how'd he get up there so fast? Dude, when I was a teenager, this is off topic, my parents used to look at me too much. They'd just stare at me. And I always felt like I'm just watching TV or something and they're observing me.

And it was like, this is creepy. And I get what was going on. I was going through puberty and they would just see me in a different way. Colin, my gosh, he's never been this thin. He's never been this strong and he's never been this tall. He's taller than my wife now. And it's just like, holy smokes, like this kid is like 15 years old. I know it's no 12, but you know, he's on the Woody schedule. Suddenly he grew like, I don't don't i'm making up numbers six inches in the last six months or it's like it's wacky but yeah that's kind of bring it on if you

dare i find myself not being creepy dad i'm like all right you've had your look you can have another look tomorrow don't sit there and stare yeah that's got to be an interesting thing for a parent to be like because i remember on the side of the kid being like when i was taller than every female member of my family being like whoa rules changed around here like now only dad gets to tell me what to do you know of course i'm joking i would be respectful of my mother because i knew my dad could still come home and he was like but still come home. But then when I got bigger than my dad, it was like, ha ha! Success.

It's probably weird coming from the other direction where you're like, oh, this is kind of like a forming adult man. This isn't my little boy anymore. It's like, really? You just put food in here and it turns into a man? What a weird process, but here it is happening.

You should... into a man this is what a weird process but here it is happening so yeah you should uh no i was trying to think of a way for you to get trt by like bringing in jackie's levels but you'd have to like smuggle something in of hers a blood sample right yeah this is making a lot of sense taylor i bet her testosterone sucks Well, Mr. Woodworth You are pre-menopausal That's disappointing Didn't expect to give that news today Yeah, no, actually So I went to the doctor last week

Because I was sick I got antibiotics and a couple other things And I was like, you know, hey, let's talk about steroids again. And she's like, well, you know, your levels weren't low enough. And I was like, what would one do to lower their levels? She's not on my team with this line of thinking. She's like, you know, steroids are for people who have naturally low levels. And it's like, well, this isn't going anywhere. The question would be, how do I naturally increase? Like, what do i avoid to make sure i increase my testosterone or you could just ask me what to do kyle said to drink but that's a tall order for me it's it the the ticket to

lowering your testosterone and google search results will back me up um uh it seemed like missing out on a lot of sleep, like maybe staying up for like two whole nights and then getting wasted the night before would dramatically lower your testosterone levels. If I hung over though, wouldn't they catch that? Nah.

You just gotta play it off. Set it for like an afternoon appointment. This is how I always am. You're all sickly and pale. Well, you vomited twice. Smelled like oranges. Yeah, I think I will Google it and look into it and see if I can. I have another test set up sometime in the fall to have my tea tested.

And hopefully I'm lower this time. And i might try to rig the test some way that i can get a bad score yeah that'd be fun i i i i've literally read um those two things and there were some other things too there may have been some foods or something like that but but you could definitely do it yeah maybe maybe like keeping your balls at a certain temperature for a month straight. Ray just rocked the bikini all the time. No, the ice bikini.

Oh, I think you're going the wrong way. It's the other direction. You want it to be way too hot. Yeah. We want to stop the testosterone from being made. I would have thought they were one and the same. Do we know that these things are different? Or are we just speculating wild?

That's what we do on the show here, Taylor. How about you guys both do this? Kyle, you wear cold panties for a month. Woody, you just buy an Amazon Costco-sized thing of hot hands and just constantly keep one on each nut sack for the next – on each testicle.

Yeah, I can't think of a reason why we don't both do that, Taylor. That sounds great. It's like a comfortable month. I could – what is that? It's soothing. I just need like flannel panties that I wear all the time. Bake those puppies. Flannel panties.

Yeah. It's genius. Maybe moreannel panties. Yeah. It's genius. Maybe more than one layer. Yeah. I remember my dad tells stories where he's like, yeah, when I pledged for a frat in college, it wasn't like today where they're like, you got to get really fucked up and then do pushups and shit.

And then if something crazy happens, like did at Mizzou in like 2010 or 2009 or whatever, when I first got there and was like you know this frat got kicked off because they hit somebody in the head in the front yarn with a shovel you know that stuff doesn't happen anymore i remember that yeah my dad was like when i did it in like the 80s he uh they they made me wear burlap underwear for like a week straight couldn't take it off they followed me around and i'm like that sounds awful and he's like and at the end of the week,

they drove me into a middle of a field in southern Missouri and made me take off all my clothes except for my burlap underwear, and they just left, and it was at night in the middle of a field. I was so dark, and I was so scared. And I was just like, oh, that's kidnapping nowadays. It was so dark, and I was so scared. I mean, being in those fields late at night with no light, watching the dim flicker of the truck that dropped you off there

finally disappear over the horizon, you're like, oh, shit. Did he make his way back on his own or did they have mercy on him and say, ah, just joshing? I think he said he made it a few miles down the road to like the closest stop and they were there like at you know a gas station or some shit a few but because i mean he didn't have a phone or anything obviously or or any money burlap underwear don't have pockets number one yep yeah what else i never heard about any of like the gay shit that you actually like all the jokes like the elephant walk none of the people that i knew from fraternities ever did that oh god i'm just

figuring out what that is i assume you hold the guy's dick between his legs and walk naked is that what an elephant walk is i i feel like an idiot now because that must be what it is i've always pictured them like reach them giving a reach around. No, it makes more sense to be bent over. Okay. Yeah, that's probably what it is. Okay. Yeah, no, the one I always heard was the come on the pizza thing.

Last guy eats the pizza. Dude, there's no way that that happens in real life where it's like, all right. Because there's one retarded ejaculator who takes 20 minutes. And by that time, it's like forming right you know because there's one like i know retarded ejaculator who takes 20 minutes and by that time it's like forming into that mouse pad by the time high school was over i had one best friend who in particular was you know my bestest friend and he put and he did a frat and even to me he wouldn't tell me what they did right he just he wouldn't share and i was like dude like i was dying to know i and it wasn't i couldn't let go of it and he's like all right woody pretty much all frats jerk off and all

sororities fuck and i've just taken that as fact or at least fact through the lens you know of his school that's what they told him yeah that's what they told him yeah this is totally normal pull it out yeah well he was he eventually you know became like a officer or something in his frat god knows what he did right no no yeah who knows i mean one that i do know that i thought was really funny but also gross a little bit not super sexual but sexual enough that it's gross is some of my friends our freshman year when they were pledging they'd be like they told me about all the stuff they had to do even though it's like super secret you know when one of my friends you know a year or

two or a year later was was arriving at school he was like dude it's like so secretive like you don't even know and i like spent like two hours one afternoon just tried to just to piss him off being like dude like this isn't 1971. We have the internet. Do you want me to pull up all of your little secret handshakes and chargers for your crap? Because I can do it. And he's like, no, you can't. You're not allowed to put it on the internet.

And so I found all of it and showed it to him. And he's like, that's bullshit. I'm like, yeah, you're right. It is bullshit. You guys keep trying to pretend like you got this super cool organization, but really you're just doing push-ups in a dark room wasted. But this one uh my friends they were like yeah we had to go and each of us had to drink like half a bottle of vodka like really quick and then we had to spend like the next few hours in our underwear doing tequila

shots off of each other and what that means is like putting a lime slice in their mouth putting tequila in their belly button and then putting salt on their nipple. And so they have to lick their nipple, take the shot and then get the lime out of their mouth. And that made me laugh. But in a way where it's like I wouldn't care for it. When I was at my first college, when I was still a swimmer, there was a guy there pledging a fraternity, but he was older. Right. He wasn't 18 18 he was like 23 or something which to us was wildly old and he was a marine and uh but you know like he had gone there they're paying for school or something and the frat is doing all these things they're putting them in

the tough situations in an effort to bond them and this marine is seeing through all of it. A hundred percent. Like it's nothing to him. He's like, this shit is bullshit. I am bored. And, and he was like comparing joining a fraternity and like some drinking games. They made them play to the bootcamp and the hardships that he had gone through as a Marine.

And it was just killed a baby. You got to take five shots of vodka, then do the dizzy bat and then run outside and shoot some afghani attackers yeah i did it was it burned into my head because he saw the whole thing through a different lens you know he was an adult you know even though he's 23 or something a marine 23 is an adult and uh and yeah he's just pledging a fraternity with these kids seeing through it and even at like 23, the people hazing you, it's not the oldest people in the frat who would be like 21 or 22. It's usually the 19-year-olds who are sophomores who are trying to give it back out because they had to take it the year before.

Upperclassmen don't really give a fuck about that. And the ones who do are overwhelmingly seen as pricks within the organization. Where all my friends would be like, oh oh yeah this dude's a fucking junior now and he's like like all excited to like smack him around or like scare him and it's like dude you realize how fucking lame that is like you're just scare him yeah just scare him oh my friends frat they were so mean to each other that that was an interesting aspect of it too like i i would come hang out with him you know because we were both in college and we just sync up again he's like this is my friend from high school and they're like woody's nice he's not like you people back off and yeah and and they were just constantly mean and i was like a protected uh guest you know in

because they had like a real frat house that they lived in and everything and they're like all right he's sleeping now fucking let him sleep you know like like this is don't try to draw on him don't try to wake him up don't try to you know like don't sabotage just let them sleep and uh but it i don't know these people i'm like what they put each other through all the time just like destroying each other's personal property and constantly messing with their sleep and homework and acts of sabotage non-stop i don't like that yeah there's a reason that after freshman or sophomore year usually after freshman year a lot of these fraternity brothers will be like i'm moving off off site i don't want to live in the house anymore because it doesn't take a ton of time to be like to go from man look

at all this freedom i have to be like oh my god i am so tired of everybody being blackout drunk like i some of my friends would like be at a frat and they'd come into an exam the next morning and be like i'd be like what the hell is wrong with you did you get wasted last night they're like yeah they made us drink until like two in the morning and i feel terrible and i barely got to study and that seemed dumber than anything to me where it's like you guys have to maintain like a gpa i think i have i could count them on one hand but it's all it's all the fingers of friends who ended up dropping out of college because they went to hog wild freshman or sophomore year in a frat and at least two i can think of did that because they didn't leave

the house see but i'm fascinated with the individual who by junior year doesn't do these things you're you're describing the person who is like this is where i belong and they're like they take a fifth year and then a sixth and they're they're like an actual van wilder type character who just lives for the tiny amount of power over younger men and in real life a guy like van wilder who stayed in a house for like seven years nobody's like dude that's van wilder he parties so hard he's 27 like he's still hanging out here you know knocking in boots with uh with you know 20 year old college chicks and doing whatever he's he's gonna do in real life you're like what a fucking loser what a joke joke. But nobody thinks you're cool.

You know that was based on a real person? I didn't know that. Although it could be based on thousands of real people. Right. That's a good point, too. There is... We used to have these high school parties. I don't know if every high school was this organized,

but we used to... It seemed like we'd go to fields, have bonfires, and drink almost every weekend. And, you know, if you're even mildly cool, you'd know where it was that weekend and people would hang out. But, like, the coolest kids from last year who clearly didn't have any future would also come to these high school parties. That's even more loser-y. A couple people would be like, you know, that's JD. You know, like, people would be like you know that's jd you know like yeah jd's here he's the coolest but overwhelmingly it was like dude you're living in the past you

are a high school graduate now you've got to move on you know none of the girls were into them is they went from hero to zero yeah yeah it's just like those people who would always show back up at your actual high school. Where, like, do you know how many times I've been back to my high school since I graduated? Fucking goose egg. I've never thought, like, let me pop in! No. No. But there were so many people who, like, I'd be

a senior and they graduated three years ago and they'd, like, just walk into the class and the teacher would be like, oh my god, Jared! Guys, this is Jared, he did this! And everyone would would be like jared you're a fucking loser dude 27 walking into a high or 24 whatever it was walking into a high school why are you giving jared such a hard time he was coming to give something back no he wasn't he's coming to take up time and get a little attention in front of the teacher be like i used to run shit around here like no i'm old enough to remember you and you didn't that's why you're here yeah if you're running shit you would have left and it got onto greener pastures it's fun so there were

i i actually also haven't been back to my high school and now uh it's gone but i could cover that later but uh the people that did come back usually it was just a walk down memory lane, it seemed. You know, they'd visit their favorite teachers, the ones that they bonded with, and just, I don't know, say hello, drop in. Yeah. That was it. Yeah, I went to, on Google Maps, I was, I guess I was thinking of, like, some of my old memories, you know, from high school. And I wanted to look at it on Google Maps and be like, you know, happened and i couldn't put any of it together and i'm like wait a minute like the tennis courts in the high school are in the wrong places like this doesn't make any sense

and it turns out that yeah they built the new school next to it tore the old one down and how long did you how long did you look at the wrong school before you figured that out i mean it was a couple of minutes like I was trying to put it together. None of this makes any sense. But it's been a long time. I graduated high school in 91. It's kind of my nature to assume it's my fault. So I'm like, I must be fucking this up.

How can I remember this wrong? But yeah, eventually I found it out. I Googled it, and sure enough, there's a new school, which is good. My school, like the center of my school was terrible. It was old. It was from, I think it was from the forties or something. And it had this old heating system with really loud vents and everything. And it didn't have any air conditioning, but the wings, the parts they added on were newer so you almost wished that you had like a science class the newer parts in the heat of the afternoon where the air conditioning would be most beneficial instead of 8 a.m where you barely needed it but yeah oh i uh i watched you

manji after you mentioned after you were talking about it was good yeah i liked it yeah i liked it for sure it was good it was good yeah he's he's charismatic the rock like that's what he does i what what was his superpowers do you remember the phrasing of sparkling smile and and charisma or something like that there was like a bravery or something and maybe climbing i forget but uh because he took advantage of the client but yeah and you know they describe it and then he just like flash a big smile or something. And you're like, my goodness, that is almost a cartoonishly good smile. It's a great smile.

It's a great smile. Yeah. So I like The Rock. I'm surprised. Would you say he did poorly in Rampage? Yeah. Well, it's not that he did poorly. It was that it was a silly movie, right?

It's giant animals fighting each other in Chicago and The Rock. I don't hate the premise, to be honest with you. You know, I guess it's like a popcorn movie. You know, it's just kind of a silly. I think it's based on a video game. I'm almost certain I used to play it. I think there was a rat in the video game, too. But you operated gigantic monsters that were ridiculous, and you tore cities apart.

So it's loosely based on that game, I i have many hours in that game well it was uh it was perhaps not worth bringing to the the big screen yeah the game was very simple i i hardly remember it but basically you climbed buildings you smashed the sides of them and then there were things that tried to knock you off the buildings. And you would die. That was basically the core of it. I don't know how they built any plot around it whatsoever. I mean, there wasn't a whole lot. It was, you know, oh, there's monster animals.

Oh, they're going to this one place. Let's try to stop them. That was about it. That was about it. There were some chemicals and there was some space. And then the rock came on and he beat everybody up. And that was it. I'm trying not to get excited about Conor McGregor's next fight.

They're luring me in. I've been watching the promos. I've been watching the fan-made promos. Yeah, but they're still so good. The fans make fan-made promos just as good or better sometimes than the UFC itself. I'm going to try to hold my excitement until it's a little bit closer it's it's until they make weight oh i would see see this is where i like to talk about the silly scenarios that can happen and and like like what if what if habib like fucks up what if he gets hurt like the day of

or the day before like a tony a Tony Ferguson knee blowout type thing. But you know that both Tony Ferguson, I don't know, Poirier, Nate Diaz, everybody is ready. Everybody's ready. I could step in and me and Conor will just fight for

Khabib's belt. How about that? How about stripping? Do it. They would. They totally would. Khabib's belt is not that legit? How about stripping? Do it. They would. They totally would. Khabib's belt is not that legit. Anyway, he didn't beat a champion. No, it's a belt. Kyle knows, but Tony Ferguson got like an empty belt. I forget who he beat.

Kevin Lee, maybe. And then Ferguson got hurt. So they stripped his belt. They're not injuring him, nothing. They're just like, all right, forget it. Nevermind. We take his belt. They're not an interim. Nothing. They just like, I forget it. Nevermind.

We take it back. You're not champ anymore. And Khabib had to beat Al Aliquinta, the number 11th ranked guy, which is like crazy bullshit. Like the 11th ranked guy doesn't even get a shot at the title. Suddenly that's all Khabib needs to do. And now he's the champ.

So I feel like his title is not that legit it will be if it beats connor but they would happily strip him and make connor and the other guy fight there you know ferguson fight so many weird things can happen uh with that fight if if one or if one or either of them get hurt or don't make weight or something like that i'm very excited ferguson is healing ahead of schedule because he's psycho. He said he's good to go. Yeah, he's medically cleared. It's not just a personal opinion.

He's actually eligible to fight again. Taylor, like eight months ago, this guy tripped over some wires and he tore his knee apart on the inside. And he had a scar that that was like legit like seven eight inches long and like stapled together like frankenstein down his knee now he's running and ready to fight again like it was like seven eight months it was nothing good for him it's absurd healing yeah he's wolverine do you suspect any tomfoolery I I don't know how you heal that fast it's very impressive if it was I it's a good question it ran through my mind on my head too but Ferguson

is just a psycho about training like every minute that he's awake I bet the guy watches TV while doing sit-ups if anyone could heal ahead of schedule, it would be him. I suppose so. It's really big. I think it's going to be the biggest fight in mixed martial arts ever. It'll be the biggest pay-per-view, biggest card. I'm interested to see who else they put on that card because it's definitely going to be some people they care about.

I agree. I think that Boston dude, Patrick maybe, with the crazy like us with a quibble cop hair is on it um i can't remember his name but uh anyway the one reason it might not be the biggest fight in mma history because i think it might be i think you're not crazy there it's that it's in august like when they did the aldo fight for example they did a world tour and they pimped it for a year and there was even a canceled event which where he beat mendez where it kind of served to promote the aldo fight when he fought alvarez

just these other fights had tons and tons of build-up somehow with this one they're like all right 10 weeks let's go and that's it i i i'm guessing it had to do with one or the other of the fighters was like i'm fighting this year i want i i want to fight in this period of time and they just had to make it that way because yeah they're definitely not doing the world tour but i think they already did their world tour i think that when conor mcgregor was throwing fucking dollies and habib was slapping around middling fighters in hotel rooms um they were doing their world tour then i think they're getting so much free press off of that from you know espn sports center mainstream

media fucking tmz like that that the build-up's already there solid counter-argument yeah i i look forward to it a lot, man. I want to see it. So much is riding on that. It could be so huge for either one of those guys. It's going to be a life-changing moment for one or the other of them because it's either going to cement Habib as a legit champion and a legit just badass at 27 or 28-0

and beating Conor McGregor to solidify that belt. Or it's going to be like, oh my god, Conor won again. Is Conor still Conor? I don't know. I don't know. It's been so long since he's fought. Who's the last guy Conor beat? Eddie Alvarez? In 2016?

He beats up Irish gangsters every weekend. Or at least once could be probably slaps few women around I count those he's 400 and 0

I don't follow other sports that much you know I mostly just read about them and keep on top but I miss having other sports I miss football and hockey. I want them to start again. I want a new sport. A new one?

What do you have in mind? Some sort of combination of the other sports, but you include trampolines. Okay. So what does that entail? Like a football trampoline? You ever see a tramp-a-golf? I don't know how that helps things at all.

That's how they're going to get from one hole to the next. Just bounce and bounce. You know what? It would be better. Did you ever watch Slam Ball? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So many broken ankles per capita in that game like every single game it seemed like some dude would come down with one leg on like that inner part and then

the other leg on the center rigid part just like because they're on trampolines so they're coming down from like 13 feet in the air basketball with trampolines and full checking oh and they had boards like hockey it was absurd it absurd. You have one designated taserman who can help shut the ball guy down. He'd be a big Samoan sniper. I really enjoyed American Gladiators, but it's kind of fake.

It's got a bit of WWE to it, it seemed. They really weren't bashing these normies the way I'd like them to. That's the show I want. I want the gladiators. You want ruthless American gladiators. Like The Running Man, if you've ever seen that movie, where you've got colossal big bad guys who are stopping you from making it through.

Maybe you go through one of those bullshit X Games puzzles where you're swinging around on monkey bars and running up vertical walls, but when you get to the end, got to face off against mongo like like a 350 pound giant guy in a suit with like a double-ended club do you ever watch pros versus joes do you remember that show yeah i think so so that was also trumped up a bit at certain points it was annoying if people don't know pros versus joes they take pros usually like top end pros like a herschel walker or something like that and then they'd have regular people try to stop them from like running into the goal and they're running into the end zone and the even the joes weren't straight up joes they're like this guy was a high school varsity running back

for three years and like yeah he's a regular person i'll admit but he's probably the best running back in my whole neighborhood you know like like they weren't just out of shape yeah he's not like an average fat guy yeah his gut is shifting on every step it's like a fit non-athlete who can still compete and would like do well and like he would be like the ringer on somebody's softball team yeah like a corporate softball game yeah and then you see what happens when they up who's the football player that had the marijuana issues i can't remember his name ricky williams that is him yeah so ricky williams would just like wreck people just and he's like they're like ricky what are you gonna do this time he's like a spin move what are you gonna do this

time i'm to lower my head because he was talking. And he would just lower his head, pound the guy. And he has two more chances to stop him. And you could tell on chances two and three, he didn't want to play anymore. He didn't want to play anymore. He was done. I'd be done too.

I am like, oh, that show was just, it was what Kyle was looking for for but in more sports than gladiator yeah i'd watch that if they brought it back and made it a little more intense i i would like anything where there's uh clubs i i really enjoyed that uh mixed martial arts where it was like uh medieval combat you know with the helmets and the the swords and shields where there was a lot of helmet bashing and uh i'm maybe you saw the clip the guy does a fucking high kick intense that the guy like a guy did a legit like a head kick like like and not and ko'd the guy because it's

a metal shin plate onto his metal helmet and he kicked him hard like like like it looked like he knew what he was doing he was not like one of those people was like oh i think i pulled something with that one no he fucking like extended and fucking kicked this guy in the fucking ear with a metal shin plate and knocked him unconscious. I like the ones in that game where like they'll get a guy in like a headlock and you can see his helmet and they'll just like take the pommel of their sword and be like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, smash it into the top of their head and you're like, oh, that's like it's creating dents.

Like this is dangerous. The thing about Kix is is you'd be surprised there's a lot to watch you know just watching a guy's hands occupies a lot of your vision you put a person in one of those helmets that like blocks most of their peripheral vision and put kicks in there with like shins that are like baseball bats covered in armor. Oh, man. That has to be a huge advantage. Just out of the blue, kicks to the head covered in armor. I found the clip, if you'd like to watch it,

of this guy getting head kicks. This might start a YouTube tangent for me. Interesting, Kiles. In the AM for me. I think it's because... Yeah, it's weird. i think it's because yeah it's weird i think it's because this laptop thinks it's in the a.m because like um the battery pack doesn't work so i have to keep it plugged into the wall so every time i unplug it which appeared to be at last been around 3 a.m um it stops counting the date and time it stops counting the date and time.

All right. Oh, wait. Don't worry about that. There's music, and it's awful. I'll just turn the music off then. It's like medieval guitar music or something. I don't know what it is. Probably not copyrighted. The fighter delivering the kick is Vyacheslav Levikov,

a Russian fighter in the WMFC, which is, of course, as we all know, the World Medieval Fighting Championship. Are you guys ready? Yes. Three, two, one, play. He's done this before. Oh, there's no way that guy knew that was coming.

Wow, and he's not finished. Look at that guy. Yeah, kick him in the fucking head. Did you see it? Yeah, he died, he's dead That dude in the Samuel Tarly thing is like I'm up next He killed him

I do like that the ref has Armor and a shield At first I was like, oh he's cosplaying I was like, well actually That might be really important What weapon would you want if you had to get into the WMFC? That fully auto shotgun Kyle had in a video five years ago. Can't. It's got to be medieval.

I think I want a sword and shield. I think that's just the way to go. And I think I'd want my sword shorter rather than crazy long and unwieldy. I think I'd want a cross shorter rather than crazy long and unwieldy. I think I'd want a crossbow. Right? Crossbow. It seems like that would penetrate. You get one shot and he missed.

And now he's just got a piece of wood in his hand. I wasn't going to win anyway. I want the shield. I'm looking at this. These people don't have much in terms of chest protection. It looks like it's just some leather. Yeah, that's just you're supposed to hold your shield there, I guess. Not a lot of shooting.

About like a flail. Just something to try and keep them at bay. But what if you get out of hand with that? You just kill them, right? I mean, better them than me. Is a flail a spiky ball on a chain? It wouldn't be like a spiky one Like you're trying to kill them It could just be like a regular ball

You're thinking more like the Morningstar I still want it on a chain though Because I want it to be erratic and unpredictable My lack of understanding of the weapon Will only make it more fearsome I usually know where these Morningstar guys Are going to go with this But god damn it's so boom boom

They teach you first day of Morningstar Stool don't do that he's doing it He are going to go with this, but goddammit, so boom, boom. They teach you first day of Morningstar, Stool. Don't do that. He's doing it. He's going to catch me. I remember as a kid, every so often we'd have a net for wrestling and whatever. A very ineffective weapon. Nets never got anybody. I feel like if they threw a net at you, you'd just

sort of not be netted. That's a terrible choice. Those gladiators did a great job with the nets. Those weren't just like sitley nets. They were like weighted fishing nets. So the whole point was just to not like catch them Scooby-Doo style, but just to get enough of that in there that like their sword

or knife gets stuck in there and just gives you a couple seconds to take your trident and run them through. Those guys were some of the most successful types of gladiators because they were they had a big advantage are you going by a source other than tv and movies um no it's not in tv and movies they're usually the ones who don't win usually it's the traditional gladiator who wins at least if you're going by like gladiator the movie and

shit the one with the best oiled up body wins yeah generally yeah no this was like a like some actual fucking article i read a while back years they usually didn't fight they usually didn't fight to the death anyway you know but but yeah the uh the old trident guy with the net was apparently very effective and i think it would be like like i don't know what the net looks like but i'm imagining a very large net and the entire perimeter has like lead letter stone weights so that when it does fall on you it sort of like spider webs all over you and tangles. Yeah.

And you just kind of, like, can't really, like, defend or move around anymore, and he's poking. So is that the move? Because I don't feel like I'm going to beat a sword fighter at sword fighting. I don't know shit about sword fighting. Oh, you'll learn. Just hold the net, try it out, and then, worst case scenario,

you take a kick to the head and you don't play anymore. Oh. You see, yeah, you're in the – The modern. Yeah, the modern play tournament. I see. But, I mean, even in gladiator days, it was really rare for them to be like, kill him. Because think about it like this.

If we had like an emperor up there and you're like oh man i love glavius he's great and they're like oh i like bacchus he's the best at the end of that at the end of every match they're like down with that guy bacchus you're dead you're like oh fuck well i don't want to come see them they're playing it'd be like if trump or obama or one of the presidents sat up there at the super bowl and was like ah and, and the Patriots streak comes to an end. And they execute the Patriots and then all of New England is like, fuck. Now we don't have a team. It was pretty rare.

That might be pretty popular. No one likes Tom Brady. I think the richest athlete of all time was a charioteer in Rome who made like just oodles and oodles of money or denarii or whatever the fuck it was back then. I'm pretty sure that's true. doing olive oil ads and all kind of stuff yeah that's that's his own sandal deal apparently that's true though like they

would have their own sandal and olive oil deals uh there was a deleted scene from gladiator that they only didn't uh film because they thought it would be so it wouldn't be it would be unbelievable and silly but it was uh maximus doing an olive oil commercial. Yeah, his name... So Tiger Woods, one billion earnings, is the most of an athlete right now. A Roman charioteer by the name of Gaius Apuleius Diocles

made the equivalent of today of 15 billion for charioting and selling olive oil. I'm very skeptical about the like uh conversion rate inflation rate between like ancient greece and now like i don't know how they put that together did that guy the purchasing power to buy like a really large mud hut which you know in today's hell no it was rome like he had enough money that he could buy and live and in a way that wasn't a you know acquirable until like a thousand years later because of the dark ages and and all that shit so like rome like rome was ahead of medieval europe by a good bit yeah until

near the end and so this guy was living you know peachy keen compared to most but of course he couldn't buy a TV or things like that. He was probably way healthier. But he could get slaves to put on all kinds of plays for him, right? Who needs a TV if you've got... Dude, he's rich enough. He doesn't need slaves. He just buys the actors themselves and has them

do little things for him. Sex slaves are cheaper than wives. If you're a $15 billion guy living in your dope-ass place, you got two aqueducts coming straight to your house. You'll find yourself to be a $7.5 billion Gaius and

there you go. Oh, not back in the good old days. She is a witch. Oh, you're not? You're happy with the way I treat you no she's not a witch she's if i tell you again don't believe me because she'll be using her witch's magic that's funny yeah man i oh have you guys been following the amarosa trump thing no it's so this is not serious politics but it's kind of just funny where we are now.

You've got Trump, who, of course, is a reality TV star, who hired Omarosa to be a senior position in his White House, who is also a reality TV star. And that ended poorly. John Kelly, the chief of staff, fired her. I don't know if Trump actually didn't know she was being fired or if that was just a way for him to handle an awkward situation like, oops, fired you, but I want you to think it wasn't me. But she released the recordings for that when she got fired and when she talked to Trump about getting fired.

And now she released recordings where she talked to someone else about Trump dropping the N-bomb. So it's not recordings of Trump dropping the N-bomb. It's recordings of her talking to someone else. This is in the campaign days. So they're discussing how to handle the fallout. They're strategizing on what will happen if the tapes of him dropping the N-bomb came out.

And during the strategy session, they kind of agree like, oh yeah, he him dropping the N-bomb came out. And during the strategy session, they kind of agree like, oh yeah, he definitely drops the N-bomb. So now Trump, she apparently signed a nondisclosure agreement. So he's suing her because she violated the nondisclosure agreement where she wasn't supposed to talk about those things. And she's releasing tapes. And if you're a guy who follows politics like it's a sport this is just juicy stuff now see where it goes they're really hitting on the

really important issues that media i was just gonna say it's not important not at all but oh my god it's salacious the head of the dnc had been accused by one and now maybe two women of domestic abuse and they were covering this instead. Keith Ellison. If that happened, then yeah. But thankfully, that's not the case. That hasn't happened. Yeah, it's funny you say that.

It totally happened, and nobody covered that. Yeah, and I believe you. Chinese spy and Dianne Feinstein's close inner circle for 20-plus years, that didn't really make the news. It's craziness. He's just not as juicy as Omarosa and Trump. Like in terms of entertainment news. No, it's not that they want to hit Trump. They don't want to focus on anything that's negative about the other side of the aisle.

Don't make it just about Trump. I think if there were recordings of Hillary Clinton dropping the N-bomb coming out, that would be kind of interesting too. People would talk about it. Especially if she was the current president of the United States, leader of the free world. Maybe the reason they're not talking about is this guy the head of the DNC or the ex-head of the DNC? I mean, she's on record calling black people

super predators. Nobody cares about that. These people are super predators. You've got to be very careful about them. You've got to be wary. Okay. She was talking about super predators, though. Dude, she was talking about people who were in and out of jail repeatedly. She wasn't talking about people predators though dude she was talking about people who were in and out of jail repeatedly she wasn't talking about people by their skin color right trump

is dropping the n-bomb allegedly yeah yeah you know he's the people on his team i mean if he had won awards in the 80s for being a positive member of the urban community, and let's say he got it from fucking Al Sharpton or somebody. If he got that, and it was approved also by Jesse Jackson, and he got a lot of pictures with all of them. Do you really have the opinion that Trump is a leader for civil rights? No, I'm saying that it's... If you look at his actual...

Go ahead, Kyle. I have an authority. Sources are saying that whenever the option is his, he has the black whore pee on the white whore. That's always been his modus operandi. And to say that he's racist,

I won't have it. Can't argue with that. I think Kyle's on to something. It's just, this is the thing they're on. Yeah, this won't last long, I don't think. Omarosa is doing her book tour. It comes out in a few days. It'll be done.

What is it, Tuesday? Yeah, I heard Democrats talking about mounting for the next presidential election, right? And they were saying that Joe Biden is the favorite. I think that's bad. It reminds me of Youngblood. And then... I think that's bad. It's bad. Young blood. And then they play a clip from... What's her name?

Pocahontas. What's her name? Elizabeth Warren. She's an even worse move than Biden. She might be. She's like, It's gonna be an uphill journey every step of the way, but I'm heading up that hill.

Did you hear Michael Avenanti, the Stormy Daniels lawyer, give his presidential coming out speech? No. He's already old fucking hat. He's just trying. He's like Scaramucci

or all these other now no names where you'll see Sean Spicer or Scaramucci or these people who were part of it for a little bit in the media, and they're trying to make careers out of it and sell their books. And it's like, no, these people are – literally in Omarosa's book that she released, one of the people that she said – I haven't done a ton of research, but I did see a tweet about this that included the screenshot of the page. She was like, it's on page 149. She is saying that she talked to me about it and that I said, Trump said this, this conversation never happened.

I didn't tell her this. And she's using me in her book. Who was the person who said that? I'll have to find it. I think I liked the tweet. I'll look through. Oh yeah. Because the person that she's recording is also saying that it didn't

happen. And then she changed her story. She released a recording of someone who said that Trump said the N-bomb. And at first she was like, we never had that conversation. And then when the recording came out, she's like, well, you know,

it's kind of out of context. Omarosa shouldn't have released it. The whole place is filled with liars. They lie at outrageous rates. I don't trust any of these fucking politicians i don't i don't trust the media even more than i don't and that's not even true i i hold them all to incredibly low regard for what they're willing to say to get things done like they will lie and cheat and steal and make something up and then uh pretend it was a story not take down bad stories

you know like cnn this morning had something where they're like trump calls an attack in in london a terrorist attack you know before all the sources are even in and like before he'd said that sadiq khan the mayor of london had said yes we're treating this as a terror attack and you know cnn doesn't pull that down like the amount of trickiness that people are trying to pull over the faces of others is is so fucking damaging to our public discourse you can't you can't talk about anything now without assuming the other person has is trying to pull one over on you or and maybe not even intentionally you know because as a general member of the population you can easily get sucked into bullshit and if it just gets promulgate promulgated enough you know you just keep saying something over and over over until it's an accepted fact trump's a racist Trump's a racist Trump's a racist He wasn't a racist until 20

Until he ran for president he won awards. He was a racist when he lost that court case for Trying to black people out of his real estate It wasn't it was to keep people who wouldn't be able to pay their rent for extended periods of time They just happened to be black. Yeah, so when he does that and he says that lower income in your mind That's a dog whistle for black people, but when Hillary Clinton, in your mind, that's a dog whistle for black people. But when Hillary Clinton says super predators, that's not a dog whistle for black people. Well, you're talking to Kyle, I guess? No, no.

And you're saying that he was meaning that that was racist because he was using low income. Kyle said low income. They busted him for discrimination. And it was against black people. But it wasn't because they were black. It was because they didn't have the means to rent there and sustain living there. That's not what the court said.

I don't think so. I'll look into it more, but that isn't what I've seen. Regardless, it's so fucking toxic. It's fun, though. I like watching it all explode. Every day there's another explosion. Every day it's fun though i like watching it all explodes every day there's another explosion every day it's uh it sometimes it's like this where it's really trivial and completely unimportant

you know i don't want to act like racism is unimportant but amarosa is unimportant i don't know how that hanger on got in yeah it got on your senior staff in the first place. How do you report on Omarosa more than Antifa assaulting actual journalists and cops around that group of 20 losers marching around in Charlottesville this year? Not much coverage of that. Antifa doesn't deserve much coverage, right? It'd be like covering the KKK every day. They're a minor little fringe organization that hardly exists. I've never seen Antifa. When have thousands of KKK members gathered together and then

assault? No, they didn't. There was thousands of counter-protesters and a couple hundred of those people. This year it was even smaller, a group, and the people that were making the violence are on the left. Good people on both sides of that argument. There were good people on both sides. What about the guy that killed the person

with their car? He was a bad guy, right? Do we all agree on that? It's easy to pick him out. He's definitely a red M&M. But there were some green M&Ms too. Not everybody killed someone that day. Just the one guy, as far as I know.

I like where you're headed, Kyle. Just the one guy. But the anti... They weren't even anti... And to be fair, he didn't strike her with the car. She died of a heart attack. Wait, is that true? Yeah, she died of a heart attack.

Well, I think it was related to the car hitting her. I think it was related to the 400 pounds that she weighed. She did not. I think you made up that number. She did. Really? She weighed 400 pounds. She smoked packs of cigarettes a day.

If you see that picture of her face that they use on the news, that's not what this woman looked like. Well, I still maintain, based on nothing, that she would have lived days, if not weeks longer. Days, if not weeks. Had she not been hit by a car. She could have extended her quality of life until November. Yeah. She was a beautiful person with a light inside her. Because it couldn't escape the gravity

he was enormous i didn't know she was all fat to be fair i i watched a lot of videos on that thing and i've talked about before that there are conspiracy theory videos that like that show the title to that guy's car and it doesn't match up with the the car that's in the video and they show the car at various stages of like being torn apart and uh and there's some images that make it look like he's wearing a shirt at one point or maybe his seatbelts buckled at one point and then it's not but it's like well maybe he buckled up you know i don't know he did he did just run over a lot of people but uh but in watching that they go frame for frame and they show the girl who died and like no she never got hit by the car there was a couple of guys that did

get hit by the car and miraculously just of guys that did get hit by the car and miraculously just didn't get hurt and of course the conspiracy theory video makes that makes that out to be something i don't believe that i think a crazy man drove into a crowd of people but um there are black guys who are just like they should get a job in like the special effects department somewhere because they're just their legs are bending the way they shouldn't and stuff and they just end up they just land like like an athlete and just walk away he he was backing over a lot of people people drive like motocross bikes all the time getting various like little crashes that are probably equivalent to that car accident you know just you miss your

jump you hit the side you climb back on you keep riding people are more durable than you know than it seems sometimes yeah for sure but uh but yeah he didn't hit her with the car i mean let him free him right he just scared her with the car it's like when a dog carries your hamster around in his mouth he didn't kill it it just had a heart attack sounds like manslaughter to me. Sounds like he frightened her. Oh, we're back on that. It was that bad looking. Whale slaughter.

Ah. What does Greenpeace think of this? Alright. Well, I guess that's PKN 208. Yeah, we've mocked a tragedy. Par for the course. Had a good time.