Painkiller Already - PKN #25

Episode Date: February 12, 2015

In this weeks episode of PKN, Audiobooks and lots of Woody's new house talk!

and we're live pk in episode 25 so you know what people fuss at us because it's almost cliche to talk about like the the episode number now we do it every week but i want to say this is right around when a lot of pot most podcasts don't even make it this far i think it's kind of cool that our sub podcast has delivered more than most podcasts i i enjoy doing these i don't understand the uh the people who aren't able to keep something grinding. I think maybe it's just because of our intense man love that we have for each other, and that's the glue that holds this whole thing together. I like the way you're thinking, baby.

A thick, sticky, manly glue. Tell me more about this glue. It looks like Elmer's glue, but it's strong, strong like Gorilla Glue, and tacky to the touch yeah so the super bowl just happened uh i'm not wait my joke oh yeah come on what is the difference between the seahawks and a cheap hooker what is the difference between the seahawks and a cheap hooker um tell me the hooker won't choke on six inches. Timely joke.

Yeah, that segues nicely right on in to Super Bowl talk. I don't watch the Super Bowl every... So here's what I like about the Super Bowl. I like the commercials, usually. And you can get those the next day on YouTube, and they even cut out the bad commercials. So I don't care about the game. It's got more to do with hating, with not

being interested in football than anything, but also my team's not in the game, so why would I care? If the Falcons were in there, or if Peyton Manning, for example, had made it there, I'd have watched it then, because that would have been kind of an interesting story. It is cool seeing Brady win. Tom Brady made it. I want to say he's the same kind of story that

Peyton is. No? I like Peyton Man, no? Yeah. I like Peyton Manning better. I just like him better for whatever reason. I always did because they always had this rivalry. They went back and forth, and Brady always just beat the shit out of them except for that one year. But regardless, I don't know how many Super Bowls Brady has now, but it's a bunch.

He's filling up a whole hand. I think it's four. I think it's four. I saw the memes afterwards. Cause the Seahawks player was saying two, four. And I, I don't know if he was saying his number was two,

four or the guy he beat was two, four or, or no, they had 24 points. So he could be talking about that. He just beat number 24, if I remember right. So they could have been talking about that.

But in the memes, it's always like, you know, four, that's the number of rings that Peyton that Tom Brady has now you know or two was something else like I forget what it was but yeah they're just ripping them so I watched the last I'm gonna say seven minutes of uh game time uh and it was really good because the end of the game I guess was the best part you know it got down to the got down to the end of the game, I guess, was the best part. It got down to the end and the Seahawks had a chance to pull ahead and they moved down the field well.

Lucky, if you remember right, there was a guy – An incredible catch. Incredible catch. He didn't catch it and then it bounced off the defender and then it landed on the guy's lap while he was in a seated position and he's like oh caught it it was like he's falling straight backwards juggling this thing and then he in his mind he thinks it's gone and then but it bounces off his crotch or something and kind of like spins in the air and he's like oh maybe i still have a chance and he still fumbles it a little,

and then he finally is just like, ah, I got it. It was a combination of a heads-up play and a lucky opportunity, you know? And then he, dude, if I'm on my butt after running 50 yards and all that, I probably still can't catch it, even if you drop it in my lap. I mean, he's a pro athlete. He's a receiver. That's why he caught it. Having said that, that opportunity was pretty very lucky catch it was at the same

time they showed other lucky catches like the one where the guy reached behind his head on his helmet yeah caught the ball between his hands and his helmet stuff like that but regardless you saw that and you were like whoa momentum's big you know and this the crowd was going crazy it was looking intense it was like they're gonna push looking intense. It was like, they're going to push right in. There's going to be no problem. And they got down to the goal line, and instead of handing the ball to arguably, you know, the best running back in the game. Beast mode.

Yeah, they got on beast mode. Instead of giving it to that guy, although I saw Reddit posts, he's had that opportunity four or five times this year, and only once he went in. So it's like a 20% chance based on that. But I think that the chance, well, obviously, they passed the ball instead, and the chances of completing that were 0%, it turns out. I'm not a football expert. I'm not.

I used to watch football a lot when I was younger, but I never played it. And I feel like the people that play it understand these nickels and dimes and stuff better than, than people who just watch it like me. Having said that, like when everybody in the stadium expects you to give it to this guy and have him run up the middle, is it always a horrible idea to do something other than that? They acted like it was the worst decision in the history of football.

And I'm like, i don't know if everyone thought it seemed like if you promised me your your move was going to be to run up the center that we just stack all the guys there and stop it like i don't know i don't know why it was so dumb i feel i i'm like you i i played a little bit of football, but I wasn't very good at it. Organized football? Yeah. Yeah, that's more than me. When I was like, I don't know, 14.

It wasn't high school age yet, but it was right before then, like eighth grade maybe, like I played this season. I just wasn't very good at it. Didn't like it. It wasn't my thing at all. And I never got to do anything I wanted anyway. I know a little about football, but not that much. I certainly can't, you know, the nickels and dimes, that stuff's beyond me. I'm not even very good at Madden. But I feel like in the red zone there, when you're right on the line, I always get worried when they put the ball in the air.

I don't like that at all. I feel like, because, you know, the playing field has shrunk down so much. It's easier to defend, right? I mean, you're only defending the last, like, I think the end zone is 10 yards. In this case, they only had to defend 12 yards. Whereas in a normal thing, they stretch it out, right? They've got people running all over the place. It's tough. Yeah, people forget.

They're like, oh, but you're on the goal line. You're six inches away. It's like, yeah. So that means they've got like 10 yards that they've got to defend with their entire fucking defense that up until now has had that huge entire field. It's been shrinking, getting more and more difficult to score

against as they went down the field. And, you know, it's the Super Bowl. That's a stellar defense that they're running. Interception has got to be your biggest fear there. Like, you've got to get the field goal off. You can't. I don't know.

When I saw it, I don't know enough about football to make these kind of calls. Pete Carroll's the man, you know. Tom Brady won a truck for being MVP. I don't know what it was. I think it was a Chevy. And he gave it to the guy that made that interception, which I thought was pretty cool. Some people might say, you know, well, Tom Brady's so rich it doesn't matter.

And I'm like, I don't know. That's a $25,000 truck, I'll estimate. Maybe a $40,000 truck. There's not many people who would look at $25,000 to $40,000 and be like, whatever, don't even need it. I'm busy. Don't bother me. No, it was a gift, and it was a cool one. Yeah, and I don't know that player's particulars.

You know, people always think, just like if they see you on television, they think, oh, that guy must be a millionaire. He's on TV. But just because they're playing in the Super Bowl, that guy might be driving with a fucking Hyundai. I think that player actually mid-season won his starting position. So he's not like an established superstar like Brady is. I hope I have this right.

I read that on the internet. It must be true. I'm sure plenty of the Super Bowl team made $200,000 this year. Not saying that's chump change, but some of those guys have multi-year 20, 30, 40. More than that. I think the league minimum is higher than that. But just the same. They're not making set for life money.

I thought it was $100,000. I don't know which sport it is. I think it's like $99,000 for life money. I thought it was a hundred grand. I don't know which sport it is. I think it's like 99,000 is the minimum. I'm going to Google it. Oh, I failed to Google it. NFL league minimum salary is 420. Wow. That's pretty, that's funny.

That's a, that's a lot of a lot of money okay um that's a different story then even at 420 right like the average nfl uh career is two or three years right so these guys get maybe a million bucks and then you know that it's, but it's a million bucks. And then, of course, it's over the course of three years. And then your agent gets like whatever, 10% of that. So it's $900. And then the taxes take a third of it. So now you're at $600.

And that's $600,000 to last you a lifetime. What it really does, I was going to say I had a friend who played in the NFL. I liked him. It wasn't like we hung out after school together all the time or anything. But whatever. A guy I know played in the NFL. And I know his situation. And basically, he played for, I want to say, four years.

Hurt his knee. And then he just... Like, he got a knee injury that I think maybe some other players, like the team, would have stuck by him. But he was like a special teams guy and um you know they're like all right have have a good career you know like we're not gonna stick by doug coleman was his name um you know so whatever what he did is he became a gym teacher afterwards but he had a really nice home that he paid for with cash and then he got to go through those early teacher years

without a mortgage over his head, which helps a ton. And he lived a nice lifestyle. And then he coached some football teams, and I think now he's an assistant coach on a serious college team or something like that. He's working his way up the coaching ranks.

Did you watch any of the... Well, we watched a few of them together, the Super Bowl commercials. Which one did you like? Of the ones I saw, the Shocks, I hardly even remember. Oh, the Liam Neeson one I thought was pretty cool. The video game one. What's his name?

Liam Neeson. Thank you. N-E-A-S-O-N. Liam Neeson. He vowed revenge in this like mobile game that was pretty cool i i like that one a lot too yeah i liked um there are a few of them that i just skipped out on because i knew that i had i had like heard the premise or i had like sort of understood the premise via a meme or something i guess there were a couple of them with like dead children or

there was one where the lady's pretending like she's making a pizza order but in fact she's on the phone with 911 and speaking in code so that her abusive husband can't overhear. There was a couple commercials with amputees in them.

It was a real sad year with the Super Bowl commercials. I don't know what that was all about. Even the Budweiser it was a real sad year in uh the stupid bowl commercials i don't know what that was all about and i get and even the budweiser one was a real tearjerker with the puppy like you know going on this journey trying to get back home to his friends the the budweiser horses i hope this isn't where commercials are going because like so rocket jump put out a video just recently and it was called like every 90s commercial ever did you see the video by chance i never like sort of caught on to how cliche they were right like kid opens the door and they're like wow liquid punch great buying mom and you know they're like

mom gives him the thing and they run a hey superstar athletes playing football with the kids yeah they all go out and play together and and you have to see like the style in which it was shot the bad overacting by the children and then of course they did a you know freddie wong style like there's some special effects and a monster involved but but i was like wow i never realized how cliche 90s commercials are. I hope that we don't run into a cliche like 2000 Teens where every commercial is sucks. It's all raw and just – Yeah, it makes you want to cry. I feel like it's going that way. It feels like it's all raw and real.

Like they went out and shot this shit this afternoon on a cell phone and it's dirty. It's just harsh. Soon Capri Sun is going to involve child abuse or something. Like, oh, man. I needed something more lighthearted and fun. You know, some merriment, some silliness. Remember those commercials when you had the office linebacker, Terry Tate. Woo!

It ain't time for a coffee break, Kevin. It ain't time. He's talking to the pain train. If you finish the Joe, you make some Mo. Woo! It ain't time for a coffee break, Kevin! It ain't time! He's talking to the pain train. If you finish the Joe, you make some Moe! Woo! And he's hitting these office employees full NFL speed. He's coming at them in a way that would cripple a grown man. He's hitting them with blind shots.

There was a series of these commercials yeah didn't they hire a rookie at one point who hit people who were innocent and there were like flags on the play they're like oh he didn't work out you know oh and he had an injury right didn't the office linebacker work through oh yeah yeah he was nursing an injury and talking about uh yeah yeah there were a lot of them yeah people were like i don't know like talking in the hallways thinking that you know he didn't have it anymore the crap out of them they think i lost a step i ain't lost a step it's good yeah there's the quick segue goes to the the office manager he's like people thought

i was crazy when i hired an office linebacker for productivity is at an all-time high because terry tate's running around like a fucking gestapo like with an ass everywhere he goes maniac dude i i almost don't want i feel like right now chris kyle is the third rail of youtube and it's like we shouldn't say anything i'm still not i i can't wrap my head around this guy people are calling him a liar right and i feel like liar doesn't quite describe what he's got going on like let me talk for a second and don't interrupt me if I'm about to kang myself. But liar to me has a certain villainous intent, right? Like someone's a liar if they're trying to trick you into something awful. I feel like Chris Kyle was something of a bullshitter, which is similar but different. What specifically are you talking about?

I've got two examples in my head. One of them is he said that doing the during the New Orleans floods he went to the Superdome set up his sniper position and killed at least 30 people you know he was just he said he was just taking out looters as he saw him leave the store when did he say that I don't know when he said it. Come on, though. I'm sure. If I don't know... Because that matters. If he actually said that.

Because that's a little cuckoo. That's a lot cuckoo. That's insane. If he said that he just went somewhere and shot looters. And, you know, it really depends on the context. Did someone report that they heard someone say that he said that? Or did he, like, write it in his fucking book? Or, you know, is he on tape saying that? Let's see.

Because, I mean, you know, remember in Braveheart when Mel Gibson shows up and nobody believes he's William Wallace? They're like, yeah yeah they think he should be 10 feet tall and he should uh shoot lightning bolts from his eyes and fireballs from his ass i'm sure there's just a lot i'm sure there's been plenty of bullshit stories told about the guy but i need to see where he said it before i can apparently there were a bunch of seals hanging out together in a hotel bar i think in new york although i'm not sure about that point the seals all began telling stories and then kyle offered a shocking one in the days after hurricane katrina he said the law and order situation was dire he and another sniper traveled

to new orleans set up on top of the superdome and proceeded to shoot dozens of armed residents who were contributing to the chaos. Three people share with me their varied recollections of that evening. The first said that Kyle claimed to have shot 30 men on his own. According to the second, the story was that Kyle and the other sniper had shot 30 between them. The third said he couldn't recall specific details. So they were shooting armed men? it does say armed looters contributing to the chaos but

but I don't know this is an article about a supposed bar story yeah the the other one let's see Chris Kyle I'm trying to see where this story came from there's another one that he killed two carjackers in Texas but well that doesn't sound so bad it doesn't and then here's another one that

says that he knocked out Jesse Ventura which has been proven false in a court of law in a civil of law. That one they... In a civil court. But I don't think they proved they didn't say it. I think they just... I don't remember the specifics.

But I... They landed it. It was a federal court case. And apparently it's really difficult to win the kind of case that ventura put down there like you have to prove that he said it then you have to prove that you were damaged by the fact that he said it and such and um all you know ventura met every high legal bar so that's a thing um i don't know i didn't i'm uh cautious of these things because there's like there's a handful of stories out there well the next question is like even if all of those things

are true and and sometimes he he liked to bullshit and tell tall tales about beating up you know celebrities and and shooting looters and what does that what is why does that matter that's where i was headed like i was saying people are calling him a liar because he's telling these stories and i feel like bullshitter is a better term right like this isn't about chris kyle at all but i i didn't read i i read an audiobook whatever you want to call that called the The Asshole Rule. And these Harvard business professors got together and wrote a book called The Asshole Rule. And they were talking about hiring staff.

And they called the book The Asshole Rule. I hope I have it right, but I know the asshole part's right. And they went into it. And they're like, we tried to find a more delicate name for it. There's the jerk rule, the office stink you know or the backstabber he's like and but none of those quite captures what asshole really means you know like if you say that guy's a jerk and that guy's an asshole asshole means a particular kind of thing like he's sour you know he's like that guy's an asshole he's really difficult to be a friend to you know like he he's got no joy he has no joy like backstabber is a thing

but a backstabber also might be really like even friendly to be around you know isn't one of us we can't we can't be friends with an asshole yeah right so they had to call the book the asshole rule because really that word encapsulated a different kind of meaning than all the synonyms to it and back to chris kyle like they say he's a liar and i'm like i just feel like liar is more of a like i'm trying to trick you for gain thing if If any of this stuff he's saying is true, he's more of a bullshitter, you know, like the same guy that tells stories about beating people up in bars.

I guess that's, that's literally one of his things. But, uh, yeah, it's more like that guy's full of crap. Then that guy's a vicious liar. He's not the kind of guy who needs to make up tall tales though.

It would seem. So that's one thing to keep in mind like does he really need to make up a story about like about killing a couple carjackers like i'm he shot like 160 people i'm sure there's plenty of interesting stories you can tell without making one up really because i don't i don't line up with that. I feel like, sure, I do agree that he has lots of true stories. He's a sniper. He has more than 150 confirmed kills. He did four tours. That's like over 300 days.

Is it 1,000 days? That's a lot. I thought a tour was a year. I could be off, though. Anyway, he has more than 150 confirmed kills and unconfirmed kills. I mean he's pegging his personal number at like 250 he says he's killed more than 250 that is not all confirmed and But still does that does that exempt him from telling tall tales I would just think that he wouldn't be i i think i think the

guy told tall tales and the fact that he lost the jesse ventura thing in a court of law in the federal court well he wasn't alive when that happened uh true true i guess i mean he wasn't there to defend himself because you know he's he's, I'm sure that may have, that could have impacted the way things went. If the guy's not even there to, I wish he was there to defend himself. That would have made for a much more entertaining story. You know,

the two of them in court, he said, she said that would be fun. But, but yeah, I don't know this Chris Kyle thing. He's just spinning around my head because I keep hearing all these negative things about him. I wish he was alive to address it. That would be better.

I still keep seeing the people who think the movie was propaganda. I just didn't feel that way. I felt like it was so dark and it made his life look so hard. It definitely wasn't 100% accurate to his book because he wasn't as conflicted in real life about the things he'd done over there, I don't think. How did he die? Did he kill himself? No. A veteran murdered him, basically.

Oh, that's right. Didn't he do a PTSD was working volunteer work or something yeah he was working with a lot of uh veterans who would come back who had physical problems and you know lost limbs and stuff he was doing a lot of volunteer work after and one of them killed him yeah he took the guy shooting and he took him that's what they were doing like they had gone shooting because he he was taking a lot of the veterans target shooting and stuff. And he took this guy with him and this guy shot him, I suppose. That sucks.

Yeah. I'm glad that we brought up his good works along with his stories. Yeah. I don't care if he was honest or not. I don't really care in general. I didn't like the movie. I didn't think the movie was good. I think everybody wants to argue about, oh, it's propaganda, or no, he was a hero.

He's a hero, he's a villain, it's propaganda. And Kyle's just like, the movie had poor editing. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, doesn't anybody see that Clint Eastwood's lost his fucking mind? Like, this is shit. Like, I know Clint Eastwood's infamous infamous or famous however you want to look at it for enjoying he likes to do one cut

if all possible like I've heard I've heard interviews where the actor talks about how if Clint Eastwood doesn't like a take

he's like well that was fucking shit let's try something else you know when they do poorly but like most of the time he wants to do it in one cut and it didn't

it didn't look good it didn't look good there was a lot of i can't believe it's nominated for all those oscars bradley cooper definitely deserves his nod because his performance was great but when um brokeback mountain was nominated for all these oscars and such and there were some people saying that it almost had to be because it was politically incorrect not to vote for it you know not to nominate it but i saw the movie and i thought it was really good yeah i thought it was very good

i wonder if this is a case where it's politically incorrect not to nominate it like the hurt the the last um like a the last movie that's comparable to this one that's sort of a military type thing that's similar in a lot of ways is the hurt locker and that was numb that won the oscar uh several years years back the hurt locker is so much better than american sniper did you see jarhead yeah i saw this thing on reddit and the guy was a marine and he said that he loved the hurt locker because it really mirrored his personal marine experience he He says you have these trailers, right? The advertisements for Jarhead, which makes it look like a nonstop action movie. And then you actually watch it.

And it's just a bunch of Marines jerking off, literally in the desert, you know, goofing off, jerking off, tons of boredom, don't know what to do. You know, they had more injuries from like propane stoves than they had from iraq and and it was just like a big fucking goofball tour over nothing and he's like yeah that's what it was really like to get into the army i thought it was a non-stop action movie and then i actually get there it's just you know me and a bunch of guys combat jacking in the desert and that's like ah it's pretty interesting um i like jarhead i liked uh i liked all those movies hurt locker is definitely the best one i can't believe i don't understand why this american

sniper movie is doing so well and i see the people walking out of it i see the interviews with people walking out of the theater and um i don't understand part of it's the controversy that has to help well sure it's it so it's the it's the biggest american war movie ever made now um it's uh clint eastwood's not lost his touch it's gonna win some oscars i saw donald trump on saturday night live years ago when the apprentice was like the biggest thing. And he's there talking to the camera in this particular like Donald Trump mega convincing way. And he goes, I am now the highest paid actor on television, which means I am the best actor on television. Just like that.

And it was like. That's brilliant. Yeah. on television just like that yeah and you're like wow he seems to have the stats to back up his case I don't know what to say you know and you know you say well is this the best war movie ever well by what metric it is nah it's obviously not saving private ryan was crazy good i don't see how anyone is enjoying this because all right so some people will go to this movie and they'll want to see an action movie they'll want to see black hawk down black hawk down was an action movie with a heart you definitely felt something at the end of that i personally felt angry i was like why didn't clinton kill more black people and i was like we should have went back and like blown some stuff up and mogadishu the the helicopter went down

they drug our soldiers but clinton oh clinton the president right right yeah you know that's what that black hawk down is a perfect perfect example of what they're making American Sniper sound like, and that's an action movie that makes you feel. That's not what it is. You'll feel because he's got this. Bradley Cooper does a great job, and he goes on a tour and comes back. He goes on a tour and he comes back. Was Chris Kyle ever in Somalia? No, not that I know of.

Then that's not the book I read. Shucks, I wonder whose book I read. Maybe someone out there knows. Tell me if you figure it out. One interesting dynamic to the movie is that he's got a satellite phone, so he'll literally talk to his wife while he's out sniping. So there's several scenes where he's got an earbud in, and he's looking through a scope talking to his wife.

Then shit will hit the fan, and there's a whole battle, and she's hearing half a scope talking to his wife and then shit will hit the fan and there's a whole battle and she's hearing half the battle over the phone. That happens a couple times in the movie. So that's really interesting. But then every time he goes back home, he's more and more changed. That's interesting.

He's really struggling. He's breaking down, crying. He's not the same guy. He's really struggling you know he's breaking down crying he's not the same guy he's there's really fucking with his marriage there's this uh one talking point i see online is uh the whole snipers are cowards thing and i don't like it i i don't either i don't get that like snipers and a really neat job like it's a little bit math. It's a little bit physical activity. There's a ton of patience involved. Most of it is reconnaissance, I'm told.

Most people know my history, but I've never been in the military, so I just know what normal people know. We watch a lot of the History Channel. I saw all of Vietnam in HD. Every bit. Just because you're not there in the action, I don't think you get to call them cowards.

I think a lot of the sniping he did, one of the things that they showed him doing in the movie is he got restless up on the roof sniping because the Marines are down on the ground clearing houses, breaking doors down, going in, who are you, who are you? And his brother was a Marine, so he's watching them do this, and it doesn't feel right to him, so he goes down

and starts clearing the houses and helping the Marines and teaching them things because they feel like the two Navy SEALs are talking to each other. He's like, these Marines, they were civilians three months ago. They don't know what the fuck they're doing down there. Let's go train them up a little bit. And the other guy's like, these Marines, you know, they were civilians three months ago. Like, they don't know what the fuck they're doing down there. Like, let's go train them up a little bit.

And the other guy's like, fuck that, man. I'm staying up here. Like, he's like his spotter. He's like, you either come down there or you're not my spotter anymore, basically. So, like, they go down there. Also, the guy went there house to house, you know. But in that book, it went differently. Like, he was, you know, yeah, I want went differently like he was you know yeah i want

to go clear houses this and that and the marines were like all right you can hang out with us but you got to go in the back because your rifle is completely inappropriate for this task you get in the back and we'll keep you safe and that was that was how it went hey uh well he would use there were two different rifles um that i him use. He probably used three total, but one of them was like a semi-automatic suppressed. Okay. Yeah. In the book I read, they described him as unarmed. I'm like, he's not unarmed. He's got his sniper rifle, but I guess if it's bolt action or something, then you've got one shot. He was always carrying, it seemed, two sniper rifles. He had a semi-automatic one and a bolt-action one.

And at one point, he made an insanely long sniper shot that I don't know if that was a truth part or not, but it was like 1,200 yards or something. Maybe it was more. Maybe it was 2,200 yards. Yeah, it was 2,200 yards. I've read about his long one. The commander was like,

he can't even see that far. But I don't understand why people are enjoying it because it's not an action movie. There's a couple of action scenes and the worst part about it to me was that fake CGI blood, the kind that you see in the Expendables movie and a little bit in 300.

And it just doesn't look good. It doesn't't look real i don't know why they don't huh he made a 2100 yard shot yeah that's crazy that's it's beyond yeah i can hardly put that in perspective i don't know that i've ever shot more than like 150 yards like that's that's you know pretty much compared to 2100 that's not even a long shot it's it's not a problem at all so yeah it's incredibly far it's it's beyond a mile say what you will about the man he was very good at sniping people yeah uh there were good parts to the movie but i felt like it was edited badly. I felt like Clint Eastwood wasn't around when they started editing

and the guy who edited it wasn't around when they filmed it. It just felt like they had two different ideas for what the film was supposed to be and there wasn't even enough footage to add up to what the editor wanted. There was so much of what Clint Eastwood wanted taken out that like his

vision was lost as well. It's what it felt. That's how it felt to me. I felt very disjointed and, and it felt like the story was jumping around. I was often confused and I'm not someone who gets confused easily with movies. I usually,

I am right there. Like you're going to struggle. You'll struggle mightily. If you come out of that movie, knowing what his brother looks like, I'll give you a dollar. I wonder brother looks like i'll give you a dollar i wonder what the truth is that's funny i wonder what the truth is like so i watch movies with you and chiz and i have in my head that that you don't mind helping me through the movie at all that it's even kind of funny like are they married yeah what are they married but i or I might be taking you out of the moment.

I don't know. I don't mind. I don't mind. It's usually good to make sure that everybody's on the same page anyway. I like doing that with Game of Thrones for people because I saw someone point out that I was wrong about the Tower of Joy or whatever it is. And that Barristanison, uh, Barrison the Bold wasn't there, Barrison Selmy. I knew he wasn't, but, but, but, uh, Taylor suggested that he was and I kind of went along with it. It was a completely different character. I know he wasn't there. I know he was wounded at the Trident and then he swore fealty to Robert and Robert accepted it. I know. Cause

he fought with the Targaryens against Robert and the, and the war. I know all that. Taylor confused me. So I'm listening to the audiobooks now, mostly on your insistence that I would like it. And you are right. I do like it. It's awesome. I do, in my dreams, I get caught up to kind of current Game of Thrones. And I'm realizing I'm like 60 hours of audiobook out, maybe 90. It gets a lot. And I'm

three hours in right now, which, you know, I'll keep moving, right? I drive at least an hour a day, like, and then I listened to some more. I eat lunch in the truck lately and that's a thing. So I'm, I'm churning through some hours, but gosh, like I've. So for you to catch up, through some hours but gosh like i've so for you to catch up for you to catch up you would have to get through um book three because uh season one of the television show is is book one season two is book two uh but seasons three and four are are are book three combined um they split book three and a half and made two seasons of television out of it what's the most recent book? is it four? or five? I don't know that

I think there's five books there are five books total and there's going to be seven to complete the whole thing so we're waiting on the sixth though his publisher has already said it will not be this year.

And it takes him like 5, 6, 10 years to write these things, so God knows when they'll wrap this thing up. I'm trying to find out how many books it is. Are you sure that you're right because we could just stop there oh i'm positive there's there's five books in existence you have okay

the television show has has has gone through three of them so far um now i read online recently that they sort of confirmed that the show will finish before the books do. Yep. Now, that's only if they don't split any more books though, right? Oh, shucks. Yeah, I don't know if they've considered that. I'm sure they've considered it, but

they could split books, or they could do, they could change the way the episodes come out. They could string us along. They could make fewer, longer episodes. And I don't know if Game of Thrones is making money. That matters, right? If Game of Thrones is profitable, like real profitable, shucks. They'd stretch it out for 20 seasons if it was profitable.

They could just do it for a long, long time. If it's barely profitable or if it starts slipping, then they might want to wrap that thing much faster. Well, they are launching their standalone service with the new season of Game of Thrones. I think that's going to be big, and I think it's going to inject a lot of revenue for dragons and such. I can already tell in the Season 5 trailer that it looks like they've upped their CGI a little bit. They've got this shot where this huge golden idol falls off that pyramid of marine, I'm guessing.

And it like tumbles down and explodes and looks pretty good. The dragons look good. I've been enjoying the audio book. It's well read, like you said. But you know what? In particular, this one thing is burning into my head. You told me they were describing how well Bran climbs, right?

And they're like, Bran is a super clim climber he likes to climb trees and books and he died climbs on not books you know walls with cobble in them and there's this has loose mortar but he handles it that way and he likes to be barefoot because he feels like he has four hands and yada yada yada and as you were describing it i was like i don't know if I like that. That seems like a lot of description. My attention spans only so long. And having read Tolkien, some of that description is bullshit. Like, if that was a Tolkien scene, he would have spent three and a half pages on the walls. Right?

He would have described the color of the the stones how deeply they indented the the moss the touch the the humidity the temperature he would have done everything on scenery so much to the point that you're like how much fucking scenery is there like when can i do something on this dark road i know it's fucking dark i know it's a road let's do something yeah exactly you know like oh my god you're taking too long on the scenery and when you were saying they spent all that detail on like his climbing ability then like i was like i don't know that's not selling it and then i heard it and i was like yes this really is essential development i like this it makes it clear and um uh i it's engaging to me not not boring. And I'm engaged pretty much the whole way. Yeah, they're so descriptive of all the characters

that you get a really good mental image and avatar that you kind of create of what Bran is like and what his strengths and skills are. And when they're well-defined, the story is much more interesting. And they really do go on for a bit about how he climbs

and they tell stories of him climbing and bit about how he climbs and and and you know they tell stories of him climbing and you know how he's faster than any of the guards and he's he knows the city better than anyone because he's climbed the highest peaks and all this stuff it's great i'm on like i said i'm on book two i just started book two you're way ahead of me in my dreams the book would have some pictures i want the audiobook to have pictures that go every once in a while just to tell me like because sometimes they'll flip over to like a whole new thing like they're talking about brand climbing and then this is probably wrong but all of a sudden they flip to like you know danny meeting call drago or whatever the fuck his name is and uh and i'm like you know wait really like he's big and strong now like

that's not oh new guy new guy okay mental switch now i'm in the scene now i'm with you and well they do announce it it'll you know they'll be talking about tyrian and then they'll go denarius denarius sat upon the large cushion in the center of the room oh that's what they're doing i'm like why did he read that sentence twice oh it's not uncommon for them to read a sentence twice every time that they go to that they change characters and locations you know they'll they'll they'll speak the name it's it's really the they'll speak the character's name that so it'll you'll be you'll hear about denarius and what's whatever's going over going on with khal drogo and then it'll be it'll be like uh john john and his wolf went through the woods and blah blah blah like they announced that's

sometimes they're reading sentences twice and i'm like is this an editing mistake or like i i don't know what's happening there but i haven't heard that oh yeah but i'm 100 certain of it and it's happened more than once and i'm like i don't know what's going on here. But Game of Thrones, that's pretty engaging. I'm hoping to be at least caught up with the show when the show starts in April. That's a real struggle. That's 90 hours. And I think I'm being kind because I'm pretty sure book three is like super fucking long.

Books one and two, as far as the audio portion are like 28 and 29 hours respectively. But I believe that the third one might jump on up to like 40 fucking hours which is indicative of the fact that they made two seasons of TV out of the third book. Good lord.

That's a lot. The coolest thing about the books, the biggest difference to me is besides the fact that, you know, there's no budget on his pen. If he wants to say there's a million men, he can say it. So that happens a lot. So the fights are always bigger and there's more men there and more crazy stuff going on.

But the characters are all so, so young. Like Prince Joffrey's 12. Wait, Joffrey's 12? Wait, Joffrey's 12? Yeah, Joffrey's 12. I didn't catch how young he was. I caught that Rob was 14 and Rob Stark is like 27 in the movie or in the TV show. And all the characters are quite young. That's kind of a big deal.

Then again, they're kind of pushed into adulthood a little more quickly. Yeah, super quickly. quickly denarius is 13 um it's just i guess what i'm trying to say is it's critical to remember that 12 doesn't mean what it means to us you know or 14 especially at 14 they're like all right it's about time for you to start pulling your weight around here whereas in my world 14 year olds um there's a part where bran is talking about being eight he's eight and he's like it's not that much younger than 14 i'm i'm almost a man like i should be pulling my weight around here i should have killed those intruders like he's feeling guilty he's like even rick and could have could have fought him off somehow like and rick is four he's he's he's feeling guilty that he couldn't fight off like

like six barbarians by himself they described hodor and so far they haven't mentioned how big and strong hodor is i don't know if they're gonna go into that more but they just they just said he's a stable hand who says nothing but hodor and i was like oh there's the bitch but i'm waiting for them to describe hodor is this like mountain of a man who can carry brain without any trouble they do they said he can carry an anvil like a bale of hay over on his shoulder maybe they get to that dude that's a little i feel like i'm it helps me a ton that i've seen the show first because i like i don't know i'm like all right i know this part i know like it's basically filling

in all the details for me and it's fascinating but I'm not hearing it for the first time yes because you've seen the show it's like the structure of everything's already there and they're just kind of doing the finishing work and filling in all the details and and uh it's great it's really cool if you're watching this and you haven't seen the game or haven't heard the game of thrones audiobooks if you have time you should listen to it if there's no part of your day that involves a drive or like sitting in front of a computer or something then then probably it's not for you but if your day does involve some of that just like lifeguard duty where you're sitting there waiting for time to pass then uh do it yeah i've really enjoyed it um one one thing i like about it as well like a lot the characters

aren't as clean all right and by that i mean they're not as black and white as uh as they are in the show even tyrian like tyrian's not perfect like he's pretty he's a pretty great character in the book now that i'm through book yeah you're way ahead of me because all the characters seem black and white to me so far ned stark freaking white he's gorgeous he's wonderful right he's in on the inside externally he's just regular person um his wife wonderful person uh doesn't really love the cold but i don't think it's... I think his wife is... She's got her... She is really

shitty to Jon Snow, and she's always been shitty to Jon Snow. She's like super rude. She's never said his name. That's how shitty she is to Jon Snow. Good point. But I saw her as a super loving and supportive wife. That part of her was the thing that I

took home the most. The kids all seem great. The Stark kids. loving and supportive wife. Like that part of her was, was the thing that I took home the most. And, um, the kids all seem great. The star kids, uh, they seem really, you know,

Rickon is a fucking wild man. The youngest one, he's got his wolf's name is a shaggy dog, which is the lamest name ever. Is it breaking like three or something? And he, yeah, he made the name of,

that's why it's so ridiculous. Cause he's a three year old and his wolf is And his wolf has been raised by a three-year-old, so it's insane. There's a part where you get inside the heads of the wolves for a moment and you get to see what the wolves are thinking. And his wolf is crazy. His wolf is just like circle, circle, circle. Don't ruin it. It bites people constantly. it's bitten like six

people at this point now which wolves are alive at this point in the show um so john snow has his wolf brand still has his wolf um i think lady no not the lady lady was killed early on. Joffrey had it. Lysandra or something? It's Arya's dog. Arya's wolf. Remember she threw rocks at it to make it run away? In book two, they tell a story of how at that part

near the Trident where she ran the wolf off, she hears in an inn that the wolves there have a new pack leader that's a female giant wolf and they've been running into the towns and stealing babies from women's arms. The lord of those

lands had gathered a great host and all of his wolf hounds and tracked it back to its lair and few of them had made it out alive and now they just left it alone and she's like hearing all this while she's at an inn and so I'm guessing that dog's still alive, that wolf. and now they just left it alone. And she's like hearing all this while she's at an inn. So I'm guessing that dog's still alive.

That wolf. So Aria has a wolf. Bran has a wolf. And Jon has a wolf. That might be it. And Rickon has a wolf. Oh, there's a fair amount of wolves left. That's good. Yeah, they killed Lady and they killed Grey Wind who was Jon Snow they killed gray wind who was

john snow's dog or um who was uh rob's dog right and yeah lady gray wind wait did john snow get i thought john snow didn't get a wolf he got the albino wolf that the others had pushed away from the group it's uh his name is ghost hmm yeah ghost is on the wall with him. Ghost is a cool name. Yeah, that's what Bran thought. Bran had trouble coming up with the name. Yeah, I just heard that part recently. His name was Ghost.

Bran really wished he thought of that name, even though his dog wasn't white. It's cool to get those parts of the book. A lot of the history, every now and then they'll do a lot of exposition. They'll start talking about the Targaryens and the First Men and all that stuff. That stuff's pretty cool. Samuel Tarly, or whatever his name is,

the fat guy on the wall, he's just pathetic. He's much more pathetic in the books than he is in the show. I already feel sorry for that guy. His father basically told him to get out or he was going to kill him. Joffrey is like the captain of the football team douche, but not the sniveling little kid douche that he was. I still think he was well casted you know even though they didn't get like this generation's james vanderbeek to play him yeah i still think

that joffrey casting was outstanding yeah i agree uh i don't think they could have done much better than they did uh they they change you know they make a few changes like that but oftentimes they're they're for the better or you or they were just about saving money. I haven't seen anything so far that I thought, ah, why didn't they leave that in? Or they really should have kept this character in. The characters that they remove, they usually have like two characters. There'll be two or three characters, and one character will absorb all three of those and it'll serve thank god because i already struggle with the number of characters and i'm only three hours

into the first book there's 60 more characters yet to be introduced yeah this is a guy who says things like liam nielsen okay like what's wrong with that yeah there's there's a lot of characters but anyway i'm really enjoying it and it's helping me fill in all the blanks on game of thrones which sounds like i'm you know i'm really completing my task i was productive today but i'm just enjoying it it's entertainment it was good yeah it's really good dude house talk so the house if people don't know we had a pretty significant renovation happening on my home. And I don't know, a lot of it's just paint and lights and kind of like bringing it up to the next level.

It's a beautiful home. But if you were to look at it real close and it's like, oh, this wall is bumpy when it shouldn't be. And hey, look, there's a popcorn ceiling in here. You know, that's not really cool anymore. So we had a construction crew come in there and do a bunch of work but it didn't go smoothly the first two weeks the electrician sucked well okay the electrician that we thought we were getting got too busy so they replaced him you know they called someone who was available and whatever sucked and it feels like their suckitude still exposes itself more

and more like the okay first there was this woman she came in there and she just like her whole vibe was that she was an apprentice not a master right in terms of electrician and like she'd put the lights up and they'd'd be off by, like, three inches. I'm having her fix it, and now they're only off by half an inch. Which seems like, what are you really fussing about half an inch? And I get that. But if I hadn't fussed, it would have been three inches off. All zigzaggy lights, recessed lights in the ceiling.

That's crap. That's awful. And, I don't know. I tell her to run one Ethernet line to this room and she's running two for some reason. And I'm like, what the hell? You know, like I'm like, I bought the ethernet line cause I wanted it to be really good stuff. And, uh, and now I'm worried there's not enough for the job and she just fucking everything

up. So she gets fired and, but the company doesn't get fired. She does. So now the owner of the company and his son are working on stuff his son is a lazy piece of shit and not being harsh but gosh everything he did was like i'd rather be sleeping you know like every activity everything he carried he was like mopey and and he just wasn't like moving and it translated into the quality of his work and that everything was just kind of like oh okay i'll do

it and you know like for example they were trenching a line connecting that my two homes do each other this is the the two homes in raleigh not r Raleigh to Apex. And the trench at parts was two and a half inches deep. If you don't know anything about putting a trench, that's not a trench. You might as well lay the cable on the ground. At some point, an inch of dirt will get removed or a shovel. Like, if you can hit it with a pickaxe, your trench isn't deep enough. And two and a half, this is my livelihood, by the way. This is the Ethernet line they're burying.

And that was the day that I got fired. I'm showing it to Ed. I'm like taking a picture, texting him a picture of the depth of the hole. And he's just like, I'm coming over now. And we look at it and he calls up the electrician. I heard him. He's like, you know what? Don't come back.

You're done. Don't come back. I'll find someone else to finish this job. No more you. And, uh, I hired a trencher, you know, to do the trench properly. And he dug up like right where their hole ended, by the way, they hit an underground power line and left it. Like they didn't mention anything. And, uh, it was like, it wasn't cut all the way way through but it was like ripped up with exposed copper underground and uh you just know they hit it and we're like don't say anything let's just stop here and that was how they handled it and then the other guy comes along and he didn't he didn't hit it with the trencher he had like a line like he could

find the lines and locate them under the ground and And he's like, here's the line right here. And I'm like, that line goes right where that trench ends. So he gets his shovel out and carefully shows it. And he's like, yep, here's the damage they did. Fuck. Like, ah. So we have a new electrician coming tomorrow. And he's supposed to, it's funny.

They're like, this guy's really reputable. And I'm like, what? How come the last guy was ever here? You know, reputable shouldn't be a selling point. But it's going better now. The last two days have been better. They broke my house. There was a structural support beam.

We're having a recess light put in the living room and there's this like double two by ten that holds up like two layers of house it holds up the attic and the house and the second floor above the the family room and uh the recessed light would have had to have been off center because the there was a big structural support beam there so some guy comes with a sawzall and just starts like cutting it gets like 90 the way through like all but the last inch and then stops and realizes that like this is a major structural beam and today we had an engineer come out and determine how to fix it, which is basically sister it to two laminate like LVLs. But, you know, if you go into my house right now, there's like temporary two by fours in the living room preventing it from collapsing. It's like, fuck, you know, and sometimes I think to myself, like I question myself, like, am I being a dick?

Am I are my standards too high? No, no. myself like i question myself like am i being a dick am i are my standards too high no no there probably shouldn't be two by fours preventing my house from collapsing in the family room that was they were just trying to install a light and now i'm sure this dude the engineer alone is going to be whatever like 500 750 bucks to come and tell them how to fix it and then they're gonna have to buy i don't know 500 worth of lumber this is like specialty engineered structural lumber and then they're gonna have to install it and by the way that the family room has all this like decorative molding like cutting the ceiling into 10 sections and such and that's's all going to have to be like taken down and then redone and put up properly. And, uh, um, I, this task is going to be, I'm making a number up $2,500, $3,000 task.

Yeah. In my head, I was like three grand. It's like two days of work, like lots of people working on it. Yeah. Yeah. A different specialist and stuff. And if they had said, Hey, Woody, we'll move this light one inch for three grand.'d have been like you know it's cool it's cool right there i hope they don't try to bill me for this you should mention that now you should be like i just want everyone here to know that like this whole thing like as the specialists are up there and like things are blinking and lasers are being used. Clint, I want you to know I'm not paying for any of this. Whoever cut that board, they made the decision that all of this would be necessary.

I would rather not have any goddamn lights in the room than for this to be going on. Like this is ridiculous. It's so stupid. While all this mess is happening, the guy who owns the construction company, the general contractor, his cousin, I don't know if he died. They said he was going to die.

That's right. And he had a quadruple bypass. So the general contractor had to fly out to, he's in Las Vegas, to possibly be with him while he died or something. But he had a family emergency and had to go. So, um,

you know, I have to be a little gentle with him, but like you said, you know, like everyone should know this here, not on my dime. Yeah. Yeah.

You, I'd want to get that out of the way now because right now you've got more leverage. You can be like, okay, well, all right, I'll pay for this extra three thousand but just so you know we're we're stopping after that i'm gonna go ahead and find a whole new group of people like right now you've got some leverage to prevent having to pay that three grand it doesn't feel like that to me i feel like if i'll because i paid half you know what you do is pay half up front you pay half when it's done so I'm sort of in bed with this guy.

And, you know, it just needs to be like, look. And it wasn't cheap. It wasn't like, I don't want to throw the number out there, but it was plenty of money. It's like way more than just a paint job. You know, something goes wrong. Heck, they're going to fix that. The master bedroom has these two tall wooden doors. Well, four tall wooden doors. they're both double doors though and um they don't shut right and they don't lock and when they shut

you can see through the middle of them definitely not the kind of privacy you'd want in your bedroom and part of the thing is to fix it and it turns out fixing it is harder than they thought the doors are warped and uh in my head i'm like well it's in there fix the fucking doors you know the master bedroom doors are going to be handled oh is it harder than you thought well suck it up buttercup you know i didn't tell you how to fix it do you think you could talk jackie into getting one of those enormous game of thrones style doors like it's like an entire like they cut down a weirwood tree just to make your fucking door like it's like that entire like they cut down a weird wood tree just to make your fucking door like it's like that wide it sounds awesome and i'm sure i could talk her into it but

that would be an upgrade if the doors we have are not bad kyle they must be 10 feet tall i don't know how tall they are i don't know if i could reach it with my i don't think i could reach the top with my as a matter of fact i cannot reach the top of the door with my hand i'm certain of it you know by like if they're not nine feet tall they're 10 like they're big doors they don't they'll have to be custom made if they if they can't i think the door's warped and uh you can't get a warp door to line up right and shut properly and everything so given that situation I think they're going to have like a custom woodworker come and measure out new doors and create them. That would be cool.

Yeah. So that's it. Yeah. It's like the big Game of Thrones doors you're talking about. It's better than what we have, but it's not a lot better. The only difference is I picture that having like lots of intricate carving and stuff. Whereas these are kind of like, I don't know, two by seven panel doors or something like

14 panels. I want a door that you require like a battle axe to get through or something like that. You know what? I'd like an arched top. The doors are square, but I think if they were, if it had like an arched top, that would be, that'd be really epic. That would be cool. But.

Well, hopefully you figure out your whole electrical situation, which has now become a structural engineering situation. Yeah, and then there's other stuff, right? Like the banister's loose, right? So the banister's loose. They say they're going to fix the loose banister. And then after they start, they look at it, and the banister, this is right in the front of the house

it it has like lots of different sections it's like they really kind of erect or set put the thing together and with the way it's built it's not an easy thing to strengthen you know so they're like you know what maybe we'll just replace the banister instead of trying to like you know there'd be so many man hours in recreating stuff, and the banister effectively has joints in it, which it's not supposed to have. So now they're putting in a new one, and I'm like, I don't understand the pricing on this.

Did we collectively decide that a new banister was easier than a fix? Because I hope you didn like remove fixing the banister out of the quote and just stick me with a new thing but there never seem to be price tags next to anything yeah and well that's no good well we talked about my leverage right yeah the fact is i have a quote on what we pay and I pay him for the rest at the end. I think I'll be in a really strong position, right? If he comes to me at the end and like,

all right, Woody, that was 90 grand. I'm going to be like, no, it wasn't. Here's our original amount, you know?

And I don't remember agreeing to any of that stuff that you built for me in there. I appreciate it. And it is lovely. I don't think I've agreed to any of that here. The way the conversation went was, you know, you said it'd be easier to replace it than fix it. And it is lovely. I don't think we're agreeing to any of that here. The way the conversation went was, you know, you said it'd be easier to replace it than fix it.

So you did, you know, that's, you could have just fixed it. Yeah. But it's ridiculous. Uh, we'll see.

I've never done a renovation like this before. I kind of sort of have in that my parents did it when I was a kid. So I barely experienced it, but, uh, I've never been in charge. this before i kind of sort of have and that my parents did it when i was a kid so i've like barely experienced it but uh i've never been in charge so it sounds like it's going pretty well so when's move-in date any any rough estimate it's silly you i'm never moving in we don't want to live there or anything yeah you're so silly i'm waiting on the unlike the the happen i'm waiting on the, I'm like the, the happen. I'm waiting on this to happen. Like someone comes to the area

and they, and they end up buying that house for like double what you paid for because it's just perfect for them as well. And then you're just back where you started with more money. You have to start the whole cycle over again. Dude.

So, they said it'd be done January 31st. And that's right around when Time Warner installed, too. Time Warner might have beat them by a little bit, like the 29th or 30th. But my internet line is there. It's done. It's installed. I use it every day. So, that's cool.

But the construction now is the hold up oh and the furniture that's the other thing even at the front even at the construction finish today furniture would be like two weeks away so i want to say we're moving in at the end of february but we've missed every other date so wildly that i've given up on it just seems like something i do but don't expect to ever finish like i keep plugging away at this out of habit but i like emotionally i i feel like we'll never finish that's that's kind of where i am it has been going on for for a long time if you include the house hunting do you remember when i closed no i the bid was accepted on that house with the pool yes that was like september or something yeah yeah i remember a long time ago

september or august right because we were hoping to move in there for Halloween. We were like, we're going to pass out Halloween candy from this house. How exciting. How stupid, right? Halloween, like, it was a long time ago. Yeah, it didn't work out. So you're going to get in there eventually. If I had to guess, I mean, another month, another month, right'll so the last two days i've been excited about the construction and what's excited me is that we haven't gone backwards so you're blinking for me i just started talking because you stopped but um uh like nothing really has gone wrong in two days now uh there's a there's a guy who's working like the um the master bathroom like there's this big bathroom but then there's like a toilet bidet section that's separate from the rest of it and it didn't have a door and uh i get that but i don't really poop in front of my wife uh some

people do not judging some people don't please don't judge but we were like we want a door let's keep the magic alive you know that that's just how just how we roll. And so there's a guy putting a door in. Apparently it's a little tricky. It's kind of a crooked frame. He's got to do it. But he's qualified. He knows what he's doing, and he's going to get it right. And I'm excited about that.

They put in some HVAC. There was a room that had this ugly brick floor. And we're going to go hard wear it in there and expand the doorway and make it all like a nice part of the house. And there was a mini split unit in the wall. And that mini split unit on the wall, I'm totally doxing myself, but whatever. I've done that so many times.

The mini split unit on the wall is tough because you can't put furniture in front of it. So it's this weird decorating thing. So we had HVAC from like the main house, like tunneled under the ground into the room and done first class and that happened today and it's done really well so it's like yeah i kind of feel like only like four hours six hours of work have been done in the last two days but at least nothing was fucked up they didn't break anything yeah there's no structural

damage there's no underground wires cut. Like, there's just moving forward. And I'm happy for that. You'll have this sewn up in another month or so. For sure. There's no way it could take two months. There's no way. Like, even if they burnt something.

Even if there was a geyser of water. This is what could happen like hypothetically it snows the structural damage isn't fixed yet i don't even know if the house is recoverable insurance claim at that point wow what why would snow do something like that because it's heavy and it's not able to support the weight because someone took a sawzall through a structural beam nah i feel like it would still i feel it nah it's i'm sure they've got a huge many stories of house would come collapsing in in the center i feel like it's what would happen dude as a matter of fact the

engineer like they weren't comfortable going upstairs, like human body weight. Like, like now, now I'm, I'm exaggerating a little bit because they shorted up with two by four. There's two by four is holding it up in our living room right now. So it's kind of like there's a temp hold on it, but if it had snowed prior to yesterday, it would have been awful. I would take a lot of snow though.

Right? Like an inch or two wouldn't do it. I agree. I think it would take five inches or something. Yeah. Which isn't that common in North Carolina. It's just the notion that snow would destroy my dream and life, work, and savings. No good?

Yeah. Yeah, it's just a little uncomfortable. Because Javier got a little too liberal with the sawzall. Yes. You're close with the name too that's awesome that sounded about right too that's great i can't believe someone would do that i hope that like that guy should get yelled at that guy should know he fucked up that's insane i would never do that it's it's had so much attention? Like it's been the topic of conversation for days now.

Everyone's like been fretting about it and stuff like Danny is a carpenter on site who's very good. I like Danny. But at the time I was just meeting Danny and everyone seemed so incompetent. I politely like questioned his competence, he's like you know dude i can fix this i can make it right and i'm like are you sure like do you know do you know what to do and he's like i know not to cut like that and javier will call him to protect his anonymity uh he was right there you Like, you just know what the scoop is. Like, that guy, this topic has been beaten to death for a week now.

He's, even though no one yelled at him, in front of me anyway, I feel like it's well known. I'm sure someone yelled at him. I suspect it'll be, he's a subcontractor, and I suspect they're just going to straight up deduct his damages from what he gets paid. Oh, that'd be great. Yeah.

I wonder if he knows that yet. That's interesting. We'll see how all that plays out. Javier may end up going wild card on you and have to be dealt with. It wouldn't be in his best interest. Like, I'm sure he's owed a bunch of money for the work he's done. So if he were just to be like forget i'm out of here we're like all right we'll take the free work you know thanks for fixing all those popcorn

ceilings and you know like i said the house is really nice but if you get up close to it you're like oh yeah you know this is like the homeowners had done a lot of work to it over the years so a lot of that is like do-it-yourself quality, not professional. We're just sort of raising the standard. And making everything match too, I'm sure. That's a thing too, yeah. And decorate.

My wife went to look at lights today. $6,000. $6,000 in lights. That's going to be some nice lights, man. That's going to be some nice lights. What. That's going to be some nice lights. What kind of bulbs are we going with? We've got to get some special bulbs, right? It depends.

Some will have LED bulbs, but a lot of them had decorative bulbs. Of course. I was thinking hand-blown glass, right? I would like some mountain men to, maybe some monks to be blowing this glass. I don't know. If I were to describe this style, was like almost industrial kind of thing and oh yeah i know what you mean yeah and uh my wife was really excited about it but i like i just looked at the prices like i'd see a wall sconce right it's a wall sconce it's like this big not no big deal right i'm like eight hundred dollars and she's like yeah we'll

need two sixteen hundred dollars like i don't think i like it sixteen hundred more than what we have now i i just i don't see sixteen hundred reasons to upgrade there's lights there now and they're like oh by the way those lights are off by like a foot we're gonna have to move them fuck Javier you got some drywall work to do you better not bitch

it's gonna be a real masterpiece when you get this thing done I'm looking forward to seeing it they had to do some exterior siding work you know because i remember i talked about removing the mini split and such so um uh so they had to redo the siding outside and i'm looking at it and there's gaps that are like bigger than a quarter inch like 3 16th inch and uh wait 5 16th inch it's bigger than a quarter inch and uh i'm looking at it and i'm just like this is too sloppy like i've cut a lot

of wood in my day and i know i would have done a much better job than these people and it's just like who do you have on this task that that did it and they're like we'll fix it well whatever and at the time they're showing it to me they're almost trying to convince me they're like well look at this other siding on your house that's not done you know that we didn't do and i'm like it's fucking perfect it's like a solid like a perfect eighth inch line all the way down and by the way you don't want it touching you need to fit caulk in there you know so that it sticks and whatever i'm like that you it's i'm like look at this wavy jagged line in this bigger than quarter inch gap and they're like well here's what the existing looks like i I know. Make it look like

that. That is the standard that we're holding this to. And today, the guy that fixed it was like, yeah, you were totally right. He's like, I would never have done that. It's all fixed now. We went out, they bought more supplies, and they did it properly. But it still makes me

uncomfortable that I have to walk around and be like, this and this and this. You can't trust contractors. They're sneaky people like there's so many horror stories about people not liking the work that's been done by contractors and getting fucked over i i at first we were all friends you know it was like yeah this is so great thanks so much for working on my house i love it you guys are the coolest now i'm like i don't care if they like me anymore you know like we hired you here to raise the standard what is that fucking like gouge in my ceiling what i don't curse at him but i'm like do you see this and this and they're like did someone sand here already because and i know this because i saw him sand and uh that's why i'm

fussing because this is the finished product it's already been sand and uh that's why i'm fussing because this is the finished product it's already been sanded and it's not up to snuff and uh you know so i i pointed out he's like i can fix it like yeah damn straight meet that guy who's like mourning his many dead family members over there right that's yeah he needs the second in command who's more reliable that's that's danny and that's why things have been better the last two days but um that makes sense yeah but um um that's what i'm gonna tell ed and i need you to walk around here with high standards it shouldn't just be me you should be looking at these lights and instead of convincing me it's good tell these

guys to fucking get their act together that's what we need because yeah he's always like it's gotta be amazing that's bullshitter so that's where we are on the house talk and and like i said emotionally i just feel like i'm never actually moving like like logically i recognize it'll finish someday but i've um like the hope is gone it's just plugging away it's like like if i don't look at the end zone or you know if i don't look at the finish line then i i won't be hyper focused on actually finishing i can just focus on the task at hand or it's hard for me to describe it's it really seems like it's uh it's been one complication after another i i'm going to be really happy for you when you finally get

to like go to sleep in the house and like all your shit's moved in and all the utilities were hooked up and you've got all the price tags and all the you know ripped off and all the like that that clear that clear plastic that comes on everything all that's ripped off and you're actually in and done yeah that just seems like that's gonna be that that's gonna be that uh satisfied seal meme at the end of it the living room had a really nice ceiling fan in it and we were like all right take the ceiling fan out of the living room because it was too low it made the ceiling seem low etc it's the one with all that molding across the middle and we're like we're gonna put this in my son's room and that'll be that so they take it down and then they leave it in a construction site for like a week and people are like tripping over it and kicking it or whatever then they put it in the server room and i'm like

guys this like keep this door closed you know this like it in the server room and I'm like, guys, keep this door closed. This is the one room we're not touching. And the server room looks like crap. It's awful. But it's not for people. So we were like, I don't want to spend any money. It has popcorn ceiling. Don't give a fuck.

Just leave it alone. I don't want to spend a penny on the server room. It's not for humans. But they had to get the thing out. Then they put the ceiling fan in the garage. But the garage has big trash piles and and stuff all sorts of broken drywall and ripped out molding and stuff and i'm like the ceiling fan was nice when we got here and it's been treated like trash for a couple of weeks now and then i looked at it today and it's broken like the one of the blades

i was like is that an optical illusion or is that blade bent and then you see the other side and it actually had like the crease of brokenness on it and not the end of the world they'll just drop that ceiling fan towards the budget or something we'll find out what it's worth 200 bucks or something and they'll say all right 200 towards your lighting budget. We'll handle it. And it's like I'm emotionally attached to it. But I do feel like, dude, you're trashing the place. That's the issue. You're trashing the place.

You're cutting structural stuff. You're stepping on ceiling fans. Stop trashing the place. Sounds like you're having a really hard time with construction crew and i don't know what's normal you know like what's normal do all construction crews break a ceiling fan somewhere in the process i don't know yeah i don't know either it's the the cutting of the construct of the beam is the worst thing. That's the... The rest of the stuff kind of sounds like... You know what I don't accept also?

The electrician that trenched two inches deep and still managed to cut a power cord, but instead of fixing it or telling anyone, they just kind of pretended it didn't happen and started filling the hole in. Whose power cord was it? Mine. So we have floodlights in the front yard, kind of pretended it didn't happen and started filling the hole in whose power cord was it mine so we have floodlights in the front yard and you know you flip a switch in the house and the lights

come on and they shine in the house that cord this underground romex thing was cut with a trencher and they just stopped trenching there and called it good hmm can't do that assholes yeah no good yeah i don't think this is normal i think this is shoddy and they really need to be watched yeah well that's it sounds like watching them has become kind of a full-time job oh yeah you should take your gun over there you should be sitting over there cleaning it all the time i got a gun with me i always got a gun with me they don't know it but it's there it's always an option it's not so i don't know i heard a bunch of people clamoring for house talk now they've had plenty of it i'm sure yeah it's house talking game of thrones talk alike yeah yeah so um i'm out of words i i wish i could better explain this it'll never happen but i'm

marching toward it anyway because i know logically that someday it'll happen kind of philosophy i've done it was school i was like that many times people like how long till you graduate i don't even know i'm just i'm just taking the right courses so that it happens someday like yeah i feel like yeah if i stress over the the finish line then like it it's like a watched pot never boils you know i'm just gonna i'm just churning away and and then eventually it happens. And that's kind of how I'm doing the house. Well, good. I think you're going to be done with this thing in two months for sure. Like two months from now, you're going to be like what I described a minute ago.

Like 100% done. I think you might be right two months from now. We'll see. It also depends on how moving out of here goes. Like what I want to do is kind of move as much as we can on our own. Like all my computer stuff and my shop and things like that. And then maybe, excuse me, hire a crew to move the furniture. Because Jackie's awfully carrying furniture. She's...

Yeah. How is she driving a moving truck? She'd probably suck at that too. I'm just imagining like all your belongings sideways in the... Like not even on the road either just right there in the yard somehow she flipped the moving truck the thing is i am more than i don't know if i'm either twice as more than twice as strong as her and then i can carry more things or heavier things without her help or i she's just like never put in full effort right like

i don't know if you know anyone who just never tried a hundred percent at anything you know physical but she might be there you know like we used to go running together on the boardwalk and you could see like as soon as like it was getting exhausting it was like time to stop no exhausting is the point of it that's you know that means it's working but yeah and anyway i feel like i'm tearing her apart i don't mean to she's great but she's awful Exhausting is the point of it. That means it's working. Anyway, I feel like I'm tearing her apart. I don't mean to. She's great, but she's awful at carrying things.

I've only ridden in the car with Jackie once, and she wrecked at the end of it. She was not able to dock at the end of the journey. She crashed in in her own yard matter of fact it wasn't like we were in some strange parking lot like european food store where like the spaces were narrow no no we were in her front yard we were teasing her about being a bad driver and then two seconds later she crashed it was great that was so great i didn't say a fucking word i was oh i think i busted out laughing i've gotten really good at at her crashing now i'm just like it's all low speed like it's basically parking lots that get her and um maybe her next car will

have like the 360 camera like maybe that would help her a ton then again i like that i feel like it's not paying attention that nabs are not necessarily like bad judgment or something kitty's car has the um has a camera and then it's got like lines um sort of i'm trying to think of the word um but they tell you where your reverse path is and stuff yeah exactly it shows you where the car is actually gonna gonna travel uh superimposed it's got lines superimposed on the screen. And, you know, the rear sensors are great. I think that's – I've got one on my car as well. Do they beep?

Yeah, and then it turns to a solid beep when you get close. Because I back in the garage a lot, and I like to back all the way in so I can close it if I want. You know what I really, really like? A lot of new trucks come with cameras that help help you hook up the trailer hitch like they really help you get that thing lined up whereas i do the walk out of the truck visually inspect it and it often takes me like three or four peaks to get it right now when i had my buggy and i was um doing it all the time it would often take just like one look I didn't pull up with never you know first try but you know go back look one time adjust and pull right in but

I'm not that good right now and I'd love to have some cameras to help me yeah that would be nice yeah so uh is it time yeah I think that's a show that's that's at least an hour and a half probably it feels like I got to talking I guess yeah we did a lot of Game of Thrones talk and then Is it time? Yeah, I think that's a show. That's at least an hour and a half, probably. What was it? I got to talking, I guess. Yeah, we did a lot of Game of Thrones talk, and then you did a lot of house talk. We talked about the shitty guy who cut your beam for an extent.

I think I dislike him now. I want to go cut a beam in his house. It's going to be stronger than it was when they found it. It really is. It's just, you know. But at what cost? Like, if you wanted, like, a super strong house, maybe that $3,000 could have went somewhere else, you know?

And then the other part of it is they were back on the house talk. But, like, even if they're like, yeah, Woody, no, no, we'll cover this. Don't you worry about it. You know, that's, you know, that's, that's good. And there's my time, but that's not even where I was headed. They're going to be like, but, you know, what wasn't included in the original contract was painting the half bath. And that's like a real example. We decided to paint a half bath that we didn't want to originally.

Like, and that will be $ thousand five hundred dollars for that paint you know and be like well yeah try to tell me i didn't pay for the structural you know i don't think that's gonna happen either you'll be okay at the end of this it's gonna be and you know in the end it'll cost what it costs i suppose it'll get done right because you're there watching them like fucking batman ready that's that's kind of what it is you know like and sometimes i like i'm on site a lot now that the internet works it helps me a ton wi-fi doesn't work i really wish it did so i'm like tethered to the cable modem direct cable modem but um how's the speed it's 50 down five up it's the same as i have here um oh and it's gonna be 100 down 10 up like really, like in the next month or two.

So that's kind of cool. But oftentimes I do yard work and stuff. Like there's a tornado came and did damage a while back, like years ago. So there are piles of debris around the yard. And I just take my little, I have a golf cart with like a pickup bed in it. It's an easy go and they used to call it a workhorse now they call it something else and uh i just go around and grab like debris fill up the golf cart dump it in the pile and uh i'm cleaning up my yard stuff like

that there was a some of the trees in the yard are being like killed with vines and i just save the tree because it's nice you know jackie does it she's like that tree is 12 feet tall that would cost 350 dollars and i'm like well shit i guess i'll keep it alive then yeah i told you about my my dad's um he he always had this idea that he didn't want to start with these young trees that you would buy he didn't want to buy trees he just thought maybe we could transplant a tree to where we wanted it and he was digging up these huge trees that you would buy. He didn't want to buy trees. He just thought maybe we could transplant a tree to where we wanted it. And he was digging up these huge trees,

roots and all, with an excavator and then transporting them. And they all died. He planted like eight of them. And I mean, these trees were like this big around. They were pretty big trees. And they were, I don't know, 15 feet, 20 feet tall, something like that.

Great. And after two years, we just had a graveyard of dead trees. they were pretty big trees and they were, I don't know, 15 feet, 20 feet tall, something like that. Right. And after two years, like we just had a graveyard of dead trees. They were all, they were all black and, you know, whenever the wind would blow hard chunks, some would fall in the swimming pool.

Like they'd all fall apart. That sucks. Cause I liked his idea, especially if he has like an excavator, like the proper tool. The roots would be so huge. And that was going to be my question. Like, did he cut all the roots off be so huge and that was gonna be my question like did he cut all the roots off did he just leave it with a little root ball or no as much as he could

like it would be a huge mass of roots and we dig these big holes to like lay them out like like they were power lines we were laying in the ground and we'd water the fuck out of them and you know that was my next question did you water it he had it set up so that you know um he had pipes with holes drilled in him like inserted in the ground so you could get water down into the root system like way down and he fertilized them and then they died they all died and i was like you tree killer look what you've done all these dead trees i loved it i thought it was so funny and then like It's so sad to me. Dude, trees are so expensive, right?

Maybe like seven years ago, he went and got all these furs, I think. And now he's got like a huge hedgerow of furs. But like the transporting doesn't work. If you, you know, in front of my house, we have that oak tree. It's really big. Like you couldn't hug it. It's too big for like even a full-size man to put his arms around yeah six it's probably five feet diameter it's very big it might be yeah it's it's big and uh um if that tree were to get say like knocked

down by a hurricane then we could literally like file an insurance claim be like we had eleven thousand dollars worth of damage that's what that tree was worth. That's a real thing. Trees are expensive. My property has very few trees, which is good for mowing, I think. My dad was fucking with me. I went over to his place the day before yesterday, and I pulled up. The day before, I'd been over there shooting,

and I had really been shooting. I had my short-barreled, fully automatic M16, and I put a silencer on it, and I was just shooting from the hip, just spraying this huge mass of targets, just having fun by myself. I came back the next day, and Dad was like, you shooting yesterday?

I was like, yeah. He's like, well, you must have skipped a ricochet across the field. There's a cow laying over there dead as a doornail this morning when I went over there. I had to bury her. I was like, really? He's like, yeah, yeah. Bullet hit her in the throat in the jugular, I suppose. She must have pumped out three fucking gallons of blood.

It didn't go easy either. She had torn the ground up everywhere a lot, suffered a lot. It was bad. I was like, shit. Oh, that's terrible. I feel terrible. I was like, well, figure out how much I owe you and I'll

pay you. And in my head, I'm like, $1,500 would be pretty light. Something like that, right? $1,500 or $2,500? Depending on the purity of the cow. Go on. I know his cows. There's no purity to be had. She was $1,500 worth of steak, for sure.

And I'm just like, fuck, man. I'm just fucking with you. You're so gullible. Fuck. You had me going. Like, I asked him twice. I'm like, for real? Did that really happen?

He's like, yeah, I just told you. I buried her this morning, like, making me feel bad because he buried this cow I'd shot. He had me going. I thought I'd murdered another fucking cow. If you had shot my cow, I'd have taken it to the butcher. He said he had found it, like, the next day to the butcher he said he had found it like the next day so like the next morning so like yeah we've done he's done that before we've we've butchered the entire cow before and we had so much beef that it it was years worth and at the end i think we just threw it away yeah yeah i like your relationship with your dad it It's like, I have a good relationship with

my dad, but he's definitely like the sort of mentor, like experienced sort of guidance type of guy. You know, I call him when I need help a lot, you know, or like I'll have a business decision to make or, or, you know, I don't know, just like I tap into him for advice and I value his opinion and his accomplishments and stuff. When I hear you talk to your dad, there's that aspect of it, but there's also kind of a chummy sort of thing. Yeah. We're, we're definitely on the, uh, an, an, an even play. We're definitely kind of equals, I suppose, in each other's minds. Like, like he knows I'm a, I'm a pretty smart guy. I know he's a smart guy. We kind of have a mutual respect going for one another.

I remember the last time we had a serious argument was like three or four years ago or something like that. We'd gotten to some kind of... He was doing something ridiculous at a bar. I was trying to tell him to fucking cut it out because he was getting ridiculous. I thought he was going to get us in trouble and he just snapped on the way home, pulled over on the side of the road. He's like, get out. We get out of the truck and go to the back of the truck

and he's just like, you can't talk to me like that. Anybody who talks to me like that, we're going to have to throw down. So either me and you are going to fight right now or you're going to have to apologize. I'm like, well, I'm sorry. I had no idea that it was going to come down to this. He was serious.

He was like, you can't talk to me like that, not unless you're ready to carry an ass woman. So you're going to have to apologize, or we're going to have to fight. And I'm like, well, I'm sorry. Let's start there. I had no idea. let's start there. I had no idea.

Let's start there. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, my father respects me, but it's more of a, like, he's proud of me, right? Like, you know, it's my accomplishments. My family is quite good. I'm living a life that a lot of, that you can hold your head high on, right? You know, things are going okay. So he's proud of me. But he definitely is, you know, the creator and I am, you know, the son.

And that sounded like a God thing. I don't know. But yeah. It's not chummy, usually. I mean, he is very conservative. Yeah. Oh, him and god he's he's mega religious now he's mega conservative he wasn't that religious as a kid he even said some anti-god stuff when i was a kid you know like like or at least anti-church stuff you know i don't know if anti-god is right but there's certainly some anti-church stuff. You know, I don't know if anti-God is right, but there's certainly some anti-church things.

Anti-religious establishment, probably. Yeah, and he had a stack of pornos that'd be waist-high on a child, right? You know, this is back when Bourne came in magazine form. Yeah. And, you know, so that's... And I don't even know what kind of unspeakable shit those two have done in the bedroom. But, God.

The Lord said, go forth and be plentiful. Yeah. Dude, get this. So, I didn't piece this together until my adulthood. This is a good story. I wish it was on PKA instead of PKN. But my mother had some sort of, like, damage in, like in where her pubic hair was. It was a tumor of some sort.

As a kid, it was like, oh yeah, that's a weird thing to happen. Shucks, I forget the name of it. But I later learned, because of my interest in MMA, that this particular type of injury comes from repeated pounding in her pubic hair area and it's like fucking mom and dad like all the time really tell me fuck the tumor into her like dear god like she had like a hematoma or something oh god yeah that's so intense i feel like i feel like that dear god yeah yeah my parents are legendary in that regard and i i got to retell this on pka yeah i'm gonna do research i'm gonna have to find some pictures but yeah then basically yeah what she had was a some sort of pube injury from repeated pounding

that they needed to be drained or something jesus okay all right well i think that's a good way to end the show all right pkn episode 25 good one