Painkiller Already - PKN 318

Episode Date: September 25, 2020

pkn 318 woody boys it's your eyebrows there's something different about them they look dark they look lustrous voluminous is it still there this can't be all natural can it i think it actually has lasted two days did you hear about this kyle woody added not at all take it away uh i bought so my chat bought me just for men they're wildly overpaid by the way they're like here's 15 it was six i'm just i'm just making money and uh you do that a thousand times and you're looking at some real money i put just for men on my eyebrows to make them go to the side and this one in particular i feel like there's still a hint of full eyebrow on yeah there is there is this one's maybe almost back to normal

but uh i took my blonde eyebrows and uh they might even be gray i think they're actually blonde though and filled them out i added the just for men hair coloring on them and then i am not saying no more goatee coloration at all there's like a hint i think of that just barely maybe it's too short yeah yeah i shave i shave usually after the thursday show but um uh so i did the eyebrows it was kind of fun as a bit but i had hyped it up for a few days and even a couple hours on stream and it was over in 10 minutes so i was like shit that doesn't seem like enough and we did the goatee and uh my chat told me that arian foster what's his last name aaron foster yeah uh was upset that i was doing blackface but i'm pretty sure they're just lying because yeah i'm pretty sure they were because you weren't doing blackface

oh but like they met they you know they fuck with the streamer and uh there's just like a parade of like he doesn't like this he's upset it's probably i was watching the end of some like at the time you started doing it i was watching the end of a british hoarders which someone suggested a uk fella well meaning watch british hoarders and they're just polite it's not fun it's not fun like they'll come in and be like my name's dr sandra kashina i'm an expert specialist and organizer do you realize you're very filthy here my bruv it's fucking awful yeah i'm looking forward to you getting it all out of here do you want us to stop and look at everything in the in the bin

no you're fucking mad take forever and so they they sucked and it was near the end of that episode people weren't feeling it and i just started getting a fucking flood of what he's dying his eyebrows what he's dying his eyebrows he's pretty mad instead and so fuck yeah that's that's some easy content it was a good bit i had a fun i had fun with it um you can't take yourself too seriously but it was a blast guess who wasted $20? Oh, geez. On the worst Witch King mask in America. Oh, my God.

It's flask. It looks like the Witch King as he's dying. Burn it. Burn it, Taylor. Oh, this would give me cancer. Oh, that's okay. You just stand away. Yeah.

I was like, oh, coming up with just stupid things to buy and then this doesn't even come close to fit in my face no no it looks absurd it's like that i want to see it even more yeah it's it's really dumb and gimmicky but i like dressing up for the streams it's fun i am trying to put together a soundboard i'm excited about that idea i'm i've been looking at soundboards like the hardware that would help you do it right and i'm like man if it's like six by six that's 36 sounds that's pretty good but 12 by 12 is 144 so it's too many sounds here can i remember 124 sounds can you remember 36

you're gonna see the perfect time for a little you know button press and it'll go it doesn't fit with the fucking worthless thing that's uh that's not what i was going for oh that could be good hey that could be funny on the show, too. Yeah. Someone linked to Wings of Redemption soundboard, and it's amazing. Middy has it. He may have this one or a different one. I'm not sure.

But this one is fantastic, and I want it on a piece of hardware. Whenever somebody will be playing a game and someone will fail at whatever they're trying to do, and he'll just play, why? Nobody will be mad anymore if everyone just laughs. That's what I get in my chat every time I fuck up Fall Guys, is people saying the joke from, what is it,

Billy Madison? He's like, you're blowing! I'm so tired of losing in that game. people saying the joke from what is it, Billy Madison? He's like, you blow it! I'm so tired of losing in that game. Have you just won once now? Yeah, still once, but in fairness, I've only played once since the last time we talked about it, and that was for three hours, and I also didn't win.

Oh wait, that's not once. That must have been 30 tries. I mean, there was one session, and it was more like 60. You must get in the top five a lot, though. All the time. Yeah. I just can't finish. I just can't finish the race.

I'm the guy who's four behind Usain Bolt and every time thinks, no, this time I got him. Never. I made it to the finals again. I'm sure that's not a big deal, right? You make it all the time. But to win the finals again um i'm sure that's not a big deal right you make it all the time but to win the finals when they narrow it down from is it 60 to 5 or so everybody left is good and uh you have to do a nearly perfect run and get a little luck because sometimes your

imperfection is not your fault some asshole bumped into you and you can't run outside the pack all the time otherwise you're taking a longer route that doesn't yeah you just have to have like i don't know that one perfect run where no one touches you a little like a little skill there's one guy who absolutely i didn't know you could be clowned this hard in this game or it was some game where you're standing on a circular platform and there's two spinning poles coming around at different speeds. And every once in a while,

the poles will line up. And if they're lined up, when they hit you, they're just going to scoop you off the whole map. There's no way to stop it. So you have to time your jumps around a certain thing. And there's one guy was standing behind me. And right as I was about to jump,

he does a little grabs me. He leaps over me to safety and by that time the gap has closed and i'm eliminated and i was like this is absurd how did you even do that it was it was incredibly aggravating but you're right you get into the finals and there's one motherfucker who's like yeah 45 win rate no big deal i'm at 150 wins or what it's i i i'm i convince myself that those people are lying or they'll be like fall guys 60 percent win rate i'm gonna post my next stream will be fall guys point point eight percent win rate platformers are so fucking frustrating anyway but they're fun they're addictive too but not my favorite platformers don't have this

luck element in it fall guys has a significant luck element yeah yeah it's battle royale platform the only reason i got my one win so i'm okay with it oh i had a thought anyway at a fall guys is fun it's more fun than i thought it was to look at it i thought it was dumb i thought it might have that minecraft quality to it where you look at it you think it's dumb as hell and you never want to give it a shot. And then you try this immensely popular game and you're like, all right, maybe the whole world wasn't wrong.

You guys said you wanted to play some Among Us too, right? Yes, I want to play some Among Us for sure. I got a group of, I can fill up a lobby. I got a group of people. We've been playing like either eight or ten people. I think it's more fun when you get ten people in there and you've got two imposters um oh is that how it works there's well you know the the host of the game can set up to be whatever he wants but you really don't want two imposters if you've got five people playing because then you just lose every time you're not gonna get the two imposters before they get

enough of you to win is it pretty 50 50 like half the time the imposters win half the time the other ones or is it like if you want to win as the imposter incredibly hard um no it's not incredibly hard i don't know i never i don't really keep track of it but it seems to me like it'll go on runs it depends who's some people are better at being the imposter. Like, like the people who are good at it will win a lot. And the people who are bad at it will lose a lot. Like, like some people are just terrible liars. Like,

and I don't mean, Oh, you're no Hannibal Lecter. I mean, it'll be like someone will, will, will call an emergency meeting. I just saw Kyle come out of event and Kyle will be like,

yeah, you did. And it's like, what are you doing? What are you doing what are you why are you just admitting it yeah the correct answer is no fuck you you came out of the vent you piece of shit he called the emergency meeting because i caught him and he beat me there that's what blue player is a rapist yeah like it gets it gets really really mean people's intelligences are insulted people's uh people's entire way intelligences are insulted. People's entire

way of life are insulted. Well, as long as we can do it without any gamer words, we're good for Twitch. I mean, they'll hold back for you. I'm sure. I've been called some gamer words. That's the whole thing, is you just gotta be the Hoover Dam and try and hold back

the gamer words, and every once in a while, some trickling comes through and you got to nip it in the bud. Very creative. Somebody told me that Woody actually let a gamer word slip the other night. That's not true. Oh, those liars. See, it's a game full of liars. Yeah. Is it the one that starts with N?

No. The one that rhymes with maggot. Yeah, those two are the only only insta-banned words. I don't think it's true. I don't know. Now I'm wondering. I was told that you got sniped in Tarkov, and you angrily called the guy a faggot, and then you were like, oh, shit, and you had to delete the VOD real quick and then come back. No, no, that totally didn't happen. See? Liars. Liars, a lot of them.

Don't trust them. Yeah, you had me wondering if like i possibly said it and don't remember it but the whole delete the vog scenario and shit i wouldn't know that liars all of them yeah on twitch if you start to say it you have to do that thing where you just extend the word until it's no longer a word where you're just like god this fucking fat this fatty is what I meant to say. Yep.

Can't trust anybody, especially in Among Us. It's an interesting game. You know, I wonder if the Gmod game was the first game like that, or if it was a copy of something to something, something in Terrorist Town. I don't even remember the full name of it, because we played that back in the day, and I hated that. I've something in Terrorist Town. I don't even remember the full name of it because we played that back in the day and I hated that.

I've never even heard of that. It's the same premise. There's like an imposter among you who has a weapon that they can use to kill people and everybody's running around. But this adds a lot of... In Among Us, you're basically on a spaceship and you're given, or

space station, and you're given little tasks to do, right? Yeah, there's three. There's three maps that I'm aware of. There may be more, but I've only played three. And one of them is a spaceship. And essentially, it's kind of like the movie Alien. There's a lot of things wrong with the spaceship that need to be fixed. And each person has like 10 or 12 tasks that they have to run around. I think that's adjustable to run around and do.

And some of them are kind of fun to do. They're not super monotonous. And they're spread out all over the ship. And so while you're doing those, there's one or two people who are just trying to gobble you all up. And every time they kill someone, they get like a 30-second cool down before they can kill someone else. And there's corpses left behind and you know when you find a corpse you report it and then a big meeting is converged and everybody is like all right i found the corpse in the top left of this in the top left

of engineering um i saw taylor just leave there but he doesn't know what he's doing. So maybe he just didn't see the body. I don't know. And then you would jump in like, yeah, I didn't see a fucking body. I wasn't even supposed to be in engineering. I just got lost. No, you know what it's going to be? It's how do I get back to the meeting room? It automatically does that for you.

But yeah, there's a lot of that. And round after round, every time someone discovers a body or declares an emergency meeting, there's this round of possible lynching that goes down where all 10 of us have a conversation. And sometimes it'll just be like, you know what? I just don't like how Mitty is sounding right now. I didn't see him do anything. No one saw him do anything. But I don't like his attitude. Let's lynch him.

And we'll all just lynch midi we'll throw and and when you kill someone you just throw them out into space and we've got it set up so there's two imposters and it's like midi was ejected and you see midi's body flying through space in the vacuum but you don't know if that was him or not oh it doesn't tell you like midi was not the imposter you fucked up you can do that but that's bullshit you don't need you shouldn't get that information because how would you know in real life if you're throwing an alien imposter out of a spaceship that's true you just have to wait till later to see if two people died at once can can you kill the imposter or is the imposter only able to kill the non the imposter the imposters are the only ones who can actually kill one another but the only way you can get rid the imposters are the only ones who can actually kill

one another but the only way you can get rid of imposters is by voting them off the ship and there's no tells other than the behavior or fucking up and like just standing by a body and saying i killed them um you could you could literally witness someone kill someone obviously um the the imposters have the ability to go into vents in the ship to sort of shortcut around the ship a little faster. So if you see someone popping out of a vent, they're fucked. Yeah, they're fucked. But that's if everybody's going to believe you. I've come out of vents before and someone accused me.

And I've just been like, no, you're fucking lying. He did it. Vote him out right now. If it's not him next turn, then vote me out. I don't care. And they'll all turn on him. Vote him out meanwhile me and my buddy imposter get two more kills plus the one guy we voted out and we're way ahead now that makes sense this sounds like a lot of fun it's a really cruel game uh there's lots of

arguments lots of let's do this tomorrow night i'm so down yeah anytime i can i can usually i don't know what time you guys you would want, but around this time, like 6, 7 p.m. Eastern time, I can probably fill up a lobby. And you haven't played at all, Woody, right? No, I've seen it a little bit on Twitch, but I don't even like watching it. We'll see how it goes. Yeah, it's not fun to watch, in my opinion. I think the thing that makes people like watching it is maybe seeing people that they know and are fans of argue with one another. So maybe that's part of it. But the gameplay itself is super lame to watch.

Honestly, the gameplay itself is super lame to do. I don't really enjoy the gameplay at all. Well, I'm better at banter than gameplay, so this will play for me. Yeah. Well, you're going to piss everyone off then. That's okay. Because that's the other thing. so each person has a set number of tasks to do when we complete the task we win oh like that's how we win so if i've done all my tasks and i'm just like all right who has tasks left you're like i got eight and you're like we started with 10 what do you mean you got eight you know this is gonna happen you've got can i do taylor's task for him no oh no they're taylor's tasks i can't delegate yeah and when

you once you've been killed you're not just on the sidelines you're a ghost now that no one but you and the other ghosts can see so you're just like literally like a like a like a casper the friendly ghost kind of like apparition floating around still doing your tasks as a ghost man why would you be doing your tasks as a ghost because they need to be done but what what happens if you don't do them then we lose oh so i'm still on your team i'm not doing my tasks as a ghost you're still on the team but as a ghost now you have to get your fucking task done or we're going to lose this sounds like fun so unless we somehow vote out both imposters which it's it could go either way that's how you win you either win by completing all your tasks before the imposters can kill enough of you or by voting out the two imposters honestly it's more likely

that you vote out the two imposters than you get. It's probably 60% of the time you get them voted out. 40% of the time you complete your tasks, at least in the games where survivors win. The group you play with, who do we need to be wary of? Everyone. Everyone. I mean, I'm not going to say who the bad players are. I want to know the good ones to be careful of.

I don't know. I think class is pretty good. I think class is pretty good. I think I'm pretty good. I think I think I think Middy's okay. Although the other night I was just like we were having a meeting and we couldn't decide who the imposter was. We were getting discrepancies in our

information that was coming from three or four people. And I was just like Middy. He's like like yeah are you the imposter and he went no kill him kill him and it was it was we threw him out of the ship he was like that's bullshit that's bullshit you really put me on the spot there i was like i just asked you if you were the murderer that's no no yeah he was literally like no if i were the murderer would i be so nervous exactly yeah and and there's a couple of people who i won't name who are horrific stupid that's a meaner way okay Okay. It's that they're stupid. It's that they're stupid. Invite the stupid people.

I mean, they just join. They're smart enough to join a Discord call. This will be fun. I'm looking forward to this. Yeah. I mean, I'm going to play in just a little bit. Everybody seems to be really into it. I'm honestly not.

I just like the group aspect of it. I don't like the game. I don't think in just a little bit. Everybody seems to be really into it. I'm honestly not. I just like the, like the group aspect of it. I don't like the game. I don't think it's a good game. But the group aspect is what you're playing for, right? Like, yeah, but I could get that out of other games, but they seem to like it.

So I play with them anyway. You know what I've noticed? It doesn't, it seems like Tarkov is really going down. Like not like, it seems like it's on that second half of the curve where it's starting to tick tick tick tick at least like when i see and you know i'm not hard scoping pastilli but it almost seems like he's starting to like intersplice other content like he's prepping

for the post tarkov world of streaming you know yeah um so tarkov goes in waves like it gets um wiped and then the interests come back in it so so that's a thing uh i think that for pastilli and landmark and guys like that they achieve everything there is to achieve in the first four weeks or so and they personally wear out of the game and that's a big aspect of why they're grabbing other stuff plus you want to be a variety streamer you want to be summit where anything you play is the hot game it's the hot game because summit plays it not because summit chose the hot game that's kyle was talking are you talking about which categories were crushing it yeah yeah you know fucking uh mind sweeper would win

if summit streaming it right because because he's summit so uh i think they're also just working towards that it's sometimes an investment to play another game even if they get fewer viewers that makes sense yeah i i agree with you it's the um the nature of tarkov and it's it's not unique in gaming but it's a bit unique uh uh among games that are out right now for the most part is the wipe cycle so everybody's done there's there's there's a lot of people who have like done everything there is to do and they're kind of like burnt out and then there's another wave of people who either started late or just got wiped out and never really got started well and they're like i don't want to jump back in there i got nothing i got nothing and else has everything, and they just push my shit in.

I have to play like a rat, and apparently on the internet, that's a bad thing to do, and I don't like it. And so everybody's just kind of waiting. A lot of people are waiting for the next wipe, I'm sure. But, you know, Landmark's got his 8,000 viewers pretty steadily. I saw him playing Warzone last night. Like, at the

last sort of third of his stream, he switched over to war zone played that for a bit he's been playing some of that i saw him playing it today yeah he said he's probably going to play the uh the new cod when it comes out that would be smart whatever that is that would be smart yeah i don't think the new wipe will be with that like yeah i would guess wipe isn't for four or five months or something yeah yeah i was gonna say next year it's the same page yeah yeah and then the other thing about tarkov is it's a fucking alpha or whatever the hell like like they're still they're still releasing content and not just maps they're still like overhauling the game mechanics and adding it's not like how

cold do you wipe your ass yeah all those things like they'll add food items and they'll they might change hydration like they're still adding more ways to bleed what what kind of addition what sort of realistic addition would be enough for you to say enough um would it be wiping your ass having to keep toilet paper on hand would it have to be there's a game called scum that we played a little bit where you would... Yeah, you would end up having diarrhea in the middle of combat.

And there was no way to just shit your pants. You'd have to pull your pants down and have a real liquid shit right there. Isn't that a prison tactic? Shit all over yourself? Well, this wasn't a knife fight. It was a gunfight across like an airport you're like behind a car you're like behind a car with an ak like shooting at a guy

and all of a sudden you get extreme diarrhea and it goes to a third person view where you pull your pants down squat and just shit liquid everywhere and and your teammates are like the fuck man the fuck we need you it's not like an 80s movie where they're like you americans cannot fire on the man covering shit you have your rules and regulation that just no no we're all convicts we're all uh we're all deviants so and you gotta you gotta piss and shit at various times you know like how did scum go i've heard people talk about it and they were very excited about it as it came out and hated it right out of the gate like it just yes too much it was too much it was too slow it reminded me of like the bad part of daisy fucking nobody's streaming it if that's it means it was really

like i bought my own server or rented my own server so that we could actually see what the game was fucking like and like spawn items in if we wanted to. And we spawned all the best stuff in. And we were like, you know, even the best shit is super lame. It's not fun. We got quite a few people in there because I just invited everybody who listens to the show to just join. And I drag them in there. And, I mean mean we had maybe 30

minutes of fun out of like 10 hours of playing and then we were just like man we really need to go back to pub g huh this is not fun this is just not fun we you get into like two gunfights an hour at least in tarkov you know you get into two gunfights a game it's at least you know this the scabs are helpful i don't remember what the ai are in scum they might they may have been like killer robots or something i really don't remember anymore but they were not fun to deal with i didn't like it it was it was too much of a survival simulator it was too hardcore like tarkov it's like right, drink a little water. Yeah, you're good now. But in this game, it was like, your potassium is low, bro.

Haven't you had any fruit lately? Literally, I want to say if you scroll down to the bottom of your stats, I want to say there was literally like vitamin wheels. Like if you've ever used an app that tracks your, your calories, micronutrients, vitamins, and they've got those wheels that you need to fill up with like various colors of vitamins and shit. It's like,

Oh man, you're B12 not looking good. You can run at 10% normal speed now. And it's like, wait, because of my B12 deficiency. Yes. Yes.

Also your fingernails, they're going to be very brittle. This is, I'm making most of this up, but literally there was like, you're barely, Yes. Also, your fingernails. They're going to be very brittle. I'm making most of this up. You're barely exaggerating. It was real shitty. I've never gone to Summit

1G's channel before, but I just went there. In the last minute of you describing it, I think he's gotten 60 subscribers. He's playing Scum? No, he's playing scum no he's playing just chatting he's been live for 14 minutes he's got yeah he's been playing daisy a lot wait he got 6 000 subs in the last no no like he's got 6 000 people watching and just it's just a of of people subbing it's it's crazy yeah i guess there's got to be a point where you have to stop

saying thank you to subs these big guys streams would just be nothing but thank you and a thank you and i'll thank you every so often like i feel like i don't differentiate between the different levels of gifts you know some guys subs it's like hey taylor thanks for the sub man big dick move some guy gives five subs and i do basically the same thing i'm like i do i repeat it how do i show proper gratitude do i do i think it five right like like how do you thank you thank you thank you thank you i need it i clearly i need a kazoo or something i i a kazoo i need my own you you need your own sound effect tools i'll you know it went in doubt i'll just go into an and do an accent. One of you guys needs to go ahead and pull the trigger on the gong. The gong. You know what?

I'll do it. Jesus, give me something. Oh, I found it. You can't have a symphony over there. Yeah, didgeridoo and the gong. Too complimentary. One of the guys I play with was like, Kyle, I went and got the didgeridoo that Taylor has. It's awesome.

It's pretty cool, man. Everyone else in your house hates you. That's what I was thinking. Nobody wants to hear. Yeah, they do. They do want to hear that. Not at your home. Because your girlfriend is in the other room.

I think it needs somebody donated so they're like let it go i know at least a thousand people who watch me on twitch who love the didgeridoo so fair enough you know but it is obnoxious there's really no use i've got a i i was watching uh freaky eaters did i tell you guys this no i was watching freaky Eaters. Did I tell you guys this? No, I was watching Freaky Eaters on the stream because my biggest streams by far are the ones where I make fun of hoarders or I watch something else and I'm kind of overtly mean to the people. There are a ton of black women who just love eating cornstarch, like the actual just a spoonful of cornstarch. And so I was watching a Freaky Eaters where this woman admitted to eating two boxes of cornstarch a day. And no. Yeah. And I was like, there's no fucking way.

You know, I'm gonna go check for some cornstarch. I bet I got some cornstarch. So I went and got some and I used this big fucking tablespoon for a giant scoop. use my this big fucking tablespoon for a giant scoop and it is infinitely harder than the cinnamon challenge yeah your mouth just goes dry immediately dry and then you begin to like almost have a panic because you can't chew it and you're like all right if i even inhale a little bit through my mouth my law i'll get lung damage and so you're like trying to breathe it. Like at one point I just went and just a huge cloud and I can still see cornstarch all over my fucking. It's all over my didgeridoo right there. It's all over the place.

But yeah, I would not. Two thumbs down. Totally flavorless. Very gritty. Not worth it. Not worth it. And high calorie. You know, and she did look.

She had the body of someone who who secretly eats two boxes of cornstarch a day fair enough fair enough which is disgust a lot of those people i thought were faking it uh there's a woman there's one woman who i guarantee wasn't faking it the woman who ate nothing but cheesy potatoes for 33 years It was all this. Every. Every machination of cheese and potatoes together. But that's all she ate. Every single meal. Her husband who was like not an unfit guy. He looked like a guy who was fit 12 years ago.

Like and he's just kind of gained weight. But he still got the frame of a guy where it's like okay. Okay. I see what you were doing. Taylor I'm feeling personally offended by this description. Carry on. You're in much better shape than this gentleman. And he would sit there with like his Brussels sprouts and his brown rice and his salmon or whatever and sit at the table and eat.

And she would sit there with homemade or oven frozen French fries covered in nacho cheese. Or she would bake a potato covered in cheese. And those are the only ingredients. At one point, he cooks or like boils her a Brussels sprout and she goes to like eat it and just sniffing it. She starts openly weeping, like can't, we can't handle it.

Just crying about it. And meanwhile, they're like, they, and the show is so fucking mean spirited. I love this about it. They'll go, okay.

So, uh, and this, these are the real numbers. So it seems you eat eight pounds of potatoes a day and quite a bit of cheese. It's nothing.

It's eight potatoes a day and nothing but cheese. Not eight pounds. Eight potatoes a day, nothing but cheese. They had a whole scene where they're like, come on out, fat fucking cunt Trisha or whatever, and she stands in front of just a driveway somewhere and it's like release the potatoes and it's like this is the amount of potatoes you eat in three months and like two burly guys tip like multiple there's potatoes all over the goddamn place and she just starts going like

it's just big fat ugly fuck what if crying about the amount of trying to hoard them very quickly jokes on you that wasn't even it then the the dietician lady comes out and she goes and now for the cheese they had to go to a restaurant supply company to get bags of cheese big enough. They threw three 50 pound bags of shredded Mexican cheese or something on there to be like and this 150 pounds of cheese is what you eat

in four months. And she was crying crying so hard. She eats 40 pounds of cheese a month. She looks exactly very heavy. That's a pound and a third of cheese a month she looks exactly very heavy oh wait that's a pound and a third of cheese a day i'm telling you this is all she eats so she's an enormous person she's a very big person see i was picked i was picturing like a normal sized woman for all of this and i was like

maybe it's a good diet they were like you are low on every vitamin like yeah yeah whatever's not in cheese and potatoes she's low on can i circle back for a second what's a good gong budget right how much would you expect and i don't even know what to buy. There is apparently a $115 but nice 12-inch tabletop gong. And there's a $175. Oh, wait. This is just a gong stand. My mistake. I thought this was a standing gong because the picture implies that.

But no. Those sneaky bastards. Yeah. The picture clearly has a gong hanging from it, but it's just the gong stand. If I were you, I would go big with the gong. Oh, my God. Okay. I was about to advise you to the exact opposite.

If you don't buy a big gong, I'm buying a big gong. The challenge with the big gong is, well, partly it's budget. It's like $550 for a big gong and then $200 for the stand. We're approaching a $1, big gong and then 200 for the stand we're approaching a thousand dollar gong purchase taylor um but uh is it even as good as show wouldn't it be better to have a 14 inch gong that you can bang in front of the camera as opposed to a 56 inch gong when you walk across this is your gong i think you're right woody that makes sense because you can hang it up this is your gong i think you're right woody that makes more because you can hang it up

give it that's the 114 dollar gong yeah that i had uh i'm thinking about maybe this is the one maybe this is the one this is a name brand gong zil john i haven't heard of that i'm serious like this number one companies where they're like did you know that zil john has been in business since the year 850 like we original gong maker you know this gong creator they make a ton of drum stuff i only know because my brother also make didgeridoo not authentic yeah there are when i first saw gongs they were all like 15 it's founded in constantinople in 1623. Yeah, so it's a very old company. That's how I knew it. I went on some stupid Wikipedia thing. You know how you do. Where I was just looking through a list of the oldest continually running companies on Earth.

And the coolest one was obviously the oldest, which was the Japanese Hotel, which has been open for over 1,000 years. I think everybody knows about that one. But yeah, the gong thing is a good idea. I'm not stepping on your toes. I think everybody knows about that one but yeah the gong thing is a good idea someone in the comments says they don't really get loud until you get to the 26 inch models how loud do they be because they're not going to be playing

Jack you should know that you just got a subscriber if Woody holds it right here gong can you hold up a 26 inch gong with one arm and hit it oh yeah absolutely Can you hold up a 26-inch gong with one arm and hit it? Oh, yeah. Yeah. You can.

Oh, yeah. Like, it's just a gong. But they hold up a 60-pound dumbbell with one hand, so. Right? Like, I. I bet it weighs a couple pounds at most. A 26-inch gong. Because it is just a thin piece of metal, right? I would like it suspended from your ceiling so that it's just always right here

ready to be gonged. I like that also. There's a ceiling fan here. It's a bit of an issue. You can lose the fan. You're just sweaty as shit. No, attach it to the fan so it's spinning and put your head into its path to ring the gong.

Now that's a recipe for a dented gong. Oh no, Woody's head. It slices him instead of hitting it square, and now we've got a whole debacle. I like the idea of a gong. I also like the idea of some sort of a mini pyrotechnics show behind you.

Yeah, well, I'll let Woody storm that beach. Just kind of a sparkler. You can get a smoke machine. Those are pretty cheap. This stand is good for 28 to 40-inch gongs. That's a lot of gong. You got a good bit of play there.

You can't go for 28. It's going to look absurd. 40-inch gong would be insane. How much is a 40-inch gong? You said hundreds of dollars $1500 oh my god maybe we back off of the 40 inch gong

that doesn't include the stand I bet there's a free gong sound for your soundboard that's a thought too yeah that's free here's a 16 inch gong for a hundred dollars i still have to pay gilbert godfrey to do my notifications

i i need to do a little more research a lot of the stuff i want him to say you know sometimes they surprise me and i don't know gilbert godfrey but like they read the script man they read the script and it's kind of neat no one holds them responsible for the ridiculous stuff they've been asked to say that's good to hear and he also like he's a pretty blue comedian so i would imagine he would roll say anything what do you want to say uh i was trying to come up with stuff about tay's house. Like, you know, thank you for subscribe or thank you for don't. Thank you for donating to Taylor's house for the criminally retarded or whatever the fuck would be. Criminally retarded.

Cranially challenged, criminally retarded. I want to get a couple of versions just that I think would be good. But I've got a notebook in the other room. I was writing stuff down. Criminally retarded. That new phrase i've never i've never heard that phrase before it's a funny phrase isn't it it is like someone's so retarded it's like we gotta take you against the law it's against the law how dumb you are oh i think i think he'd roll with with some of phrases. But I've been poking around the Cameo site, and there's no one that tugs at my strings like Gilbert so far. I think I'm going to stick with him and stop searching.

But I'm not very familiar with the app, honestly. Seems like some celebrities are raking in a sick amount of money doing this. Really? Just doing nothing but recording a couple MP4s. Like the actual big celebrities, they're priced at like $500 five six hundred dollars and you have to imagine what half dozen people a day doing that i would think i don't know i don't know like alissa milano is 250 dollars no but she's not very big i was meaning like the like there's a couple I'd pay her not to say something to me. What was she even in? Eliza Milano.

Was she in Charmed? I don't know. I've never even. I think so but I think of her as from Who's the Boss with Tony Danza. I've never watched that either. You guys are young for that but she was like the mega hot Christine Applegate

of her time. Okay that's why I don't know say that again no i was just making a cancer joke it's okay oh oh did she hit did she have cancer no christina applegate did then yeah mastectomy did she have cancer or was she like no one of those did she have that condition where she was like guaranteed did she have like preemptive mastectomies god i hope not like angelina jolie didn't she have that condition where it was guaranteed? Did she have preemptive mastectomies? God, I hope not. Like Angelina Jolie, didn't she do that? I'm not sure. Yeah, there's a genetic condition where you're like,

you're definitely going to get breast cancer. Do I have it? Oh, no, no, no. We just know that with your genes, you're going to die of breast cancer if we don't take your boobs. So sometimes they just do it ahead of time. Fuck you, I'm keeping them. Do they ever just scoop out all the

potentially bad bits and just fill it up? That's what they should do. They should hollow it out. That seems safer, right? Yeah, and give me what they take out. Oh, you don't want... Oh, yes, I do. I want to use it as cooking oil. Shoe Nice will do

stuff for $10. Shoe Nice is for $10. Just needs another pint, does he? Needs another what? Another pint. Yeah, right. Crystal Palace or whatever the cheapest vodka is.

I would cook with human fat. You know what? I would rather not eat something cooked in human fat. Why not? Well, no, I bet. We taste we taste like pigs right so it probably tastes like pig fat what if it was like french fries like these french fries were boiled and human fried

and human fat you know what I need more lived experience I'll do it sure yeah boogie is 30 bucks just saying boogie does it he eats fries cooked in human fat Boogie is $30. Just saying. Boogie does it? Mm-hmm. He eats fries cooked in human fat? Yeah.

I'm sorry. I'm on Cameo. I know that a bunch of YouTubers do it, and it captured my interest. I don't know. I'm thinking about Taylor's House. What would be cool? Yeah. Gilbert Gottfried's pretty good, though.

He's got a great voice i like that a lot i told my dad i texted him i i was told i was looking at a motorcycle he was like you might as well be riding around on a nuclear weapon get lamar on the show i need an ally i want him to help me does does i never even asked, does your dad have a drawl at all being from where he is? Or is he similar to you when he works through it? No, he's got a southern accent for sure. I don't know anybody from the south that sounds like you, honestly. He has a southern pace.

I'm sure Kyle's right, but his drawl didn't stick out to me. But his pacing did. He'll speak at the rate he wants to. Yeah, he's not in a hurry. It's not like one of them voices like this or anything, but, you know, I definitely, yeah, no one sounds like me because I made up what I sound like.

You're just trying to imitate that Midwest master accent. Everyone can understand me. That's why we're all the newscasters. That's what I'm going for. Absolutely. I'm impersonating someone who knows how to enunciate. You're doing a good job. But yeah, he didn't love the idea, but that's okay.

He's ridden one before. He doesn't get to. I think he owns one now. I don't know. He goes back and forth. Like he had one for a long time. Like I want to say my uncle bought one and was like, I made a mistake. My dad was like, well, here's $12,000.

And now I own one. Your dad probably did it. Like he seems to do a bunch of projects, right? Like he probably wasn't going out every weekend or anything. He would just zip around like maybe once a month for like 10 minutes. Like he wasn't going out every weekend or anything. He would just zip around like maybe once a month for like 10 minutes. Like he didn't ride it. He really bought it to get somebody else out of their debt, which is just him being nice guy. Anyway. Um, I don't know. I've looked at a bunch of them now. I, I'm still have no idea what I'm going to get. I need to ride

some motorcycles and then I'll know. But, uh, the short list, I'm looking at the Harley 883 Iron, the Indian Scout 60 maybe, something like that. Still the Honda Rebel. I need to see one. I think it's going to be too small for me though. What turns you off? I think my knees are going to be like coming way up. I think I'm too tall for the bike. I think my arms are too long and my legs are too long for that bike.

I think when the bike is under me and I stand up, I think there's going to be this much room between my crotch and that seat. I'm going to have to sit down to get on it because it's 24 inches of seat height on that bike. You'll be stopping every 15 minutes because your back hurts if you do that. Yeah, I've got to find something that I can ride for hours at a time and not be like hating myself uh the kawasaki vulcan i've looked at it um i like i like the look of it again i need to see it's just uh it's a bit larger than the than the rebel so again need to ride it and there's a couple others there

was a boulevard bike that looked kind of cool but mostly right now i think it's between the uh the indian scout which is probably way too heavy for what i want and i need to feel that before i know for sure and the harley a83 which looks fucking awesome yeah the a the harley and the indian are kind of neck and neck i think the the indian's probably a little... I think they're both probably like 8,000, something like that new. Maybe a little bit more with ABS, like 8,500, 8,700. But I'd probably find a used one.

They're easy to find used because so many people buy motorcycles and then they're like, this was a poor idea. I have made a mistake. Are they the same level of power as the Honda? Like you're not bumping up? No, these are a lot faster. Oh, okay. Well, I was looking up sidecars.

Oh, these will pull a sidecar. All of these are just so scary. I do not trust this. The Honda I was looking at is like just under 500 cc's. And I'm no expert, but the fact that they call it an 883 iron leads me to believe that maybe it's an 883 cc. Is this the Harley we're talking about? Yeah. You're probably right.

I don't know either. But the Harleys notoriously have less power per cc. Yeah, I read that the engine is much more modern than the Harleys. Is it because the Harleys notoriously have less power per CC. Yeah, I read that the Indians, the engine is much more modern than the Harleys. Is it because the Harleys are heavier? No, just because their engine design is older. Oh. I was looking at one side car and it looked a little bit comfortable. It was like, weight limit 220 pounds.

And I was like, well, if I like push up on Kyle's seat. I'm like, I'm doing a curl the whole time we drive, pulling up on you. Just holding onto your fucking hands. I gotcha. 15 minutes into a 10 hour drive. Yeah, I would need a stronger one than that. That would be hilarious to have you in the sidecar of my motorcycle i would love that so much that is funny he could just sit on the back the goggles on

i don't want him on the back of my motorcycle and he doesn't want to be on the back of my motorcycle no that would make that's a lot of weight that is the normal way this problem is solved only if he he wears the assless chaps with nothing underneath will i let him on the back of my motorcycle i thought that was a given whether i'm making my ass print on the brand new side car or on the back you know either way we'll see oh no i'm not gonna i'm not gonna sit on a leather seat with a bare ass i'll be so slick and sweaty i'll go from sticky to sweaty in one second and then that'll be my new sitting style i can't you can't have a full-grown man riding bitch woody did you lube this yeah i did i did like it makes sense when you've got a little girl on the back of the motorcycle.

It's almost like an ornament. But when you've got Taylor's ass right back there holding on to you and leaning into the turn. I'll have you know. Soon we're going to be leaving the 220s and into the 210s.

Good, good. I wouldn't want someone who weighed 150 on the back of that thing. I wouldn't want a man. He's going to change how the thing rides anyway. I don't want any extra weight on there. Yeah. At least a woman, more weight towards the bottom, lower center of gravity. Oh.

I am. So when you put someone on the back, obviously it accelerates slower, and you just teach them to sort of keep their spine in alignment with yours and it rides pretty well. But if you do wheelies with it, I'm not very good at wheelies, but when you do wheelies with a passenger, it pops up so much easier. The biggest wheelie I've ever done maybe had been accidental with a passenger on the back and I tried to pull it off like i meant to do that but it was a poor decision jesus you didn't even mean to do a wheelie no i meant to do a wheelie but i had done that like you know many i'm not very good at wheelies but i had done this particular wheelie we get the front like two feet off and and right away a bunch of times but i was like 12 o'clock i think i hit the foot brake to bring it back down it was it was

wildly out of control it's not your pastor is terrified yeah my passenger he was really fit he was from uh the wrestling team and uh he thank god yeah yeah thank god he's a grappler he held on and uh it was a mistake it was a poor decision by an irresponsible version of me. That would have been dead on the highway. Speaking of grapplers, I was more happy after watching that Tyron Woodley fight than I have been after a UFC event in a very, very long time. So I saw Colby Covington won the bout. And what's the fallout? Is he going to the championship now or was that the championship? So there's two sort of good fights for him.

And both of them already have uh fights coming up i think yeah he's just going to be waiting for a while to for his next uh which is next that sucks about covington so the last time covington fought he fought the i think he was the interim champ so he and the like real champ went against each other and the real champ broke his face so covington had to rest for like is it a year a year and some it was last december when he when he got his jaw broken okay so uh so he's been out for nine months it felt longer to me but like 10 months anyway um and i i really like watching him fight and i like watching him hype a fight and i like this guy on my tv so it was a bummer that he was out

for like 10 months now i think he's going to be out for a while again too because he pretty much the people he wants to fight will have to have two fights worth of waiting the one that's coming up and the one that will be with him yeah taylor he he he beat the shit out of tyron woodley and then they were on the ground and uh his head was against tyron's ribs and tyron kind of had him in this headlock and the way they moved or whatever somehow or another tyron's ribs got broken badly by colby's head being squeezed against them or tyron trying to move with his head there they and it wasn't like a fracture you know you hear broken bone and you think like like oh it's a little crack in it? It's like the rib did this in the x-ray.

And Tyron started screaming as he lay on the floor. Ah! My ribs! My ribs! And they had to stop the fight due to crying bitch on the ground. Really? Awesome. I've never seen a fighter scream in pain.

His rib was hurt earlier in the fight i i i don't think they've discovered the like the actual kick or punch that damaged the rib but he said it was hurt earlier and uh there was a real good body kick to that side of his ribs uh earlier that i remember seeing okay maybe that was it but tyrant but you know tyrant's a fighter he didn't like his face didn't change a bit when he took that kick some fighters are good that way yul romero is really good that way and uh yeah so so he had that damaged rib and then like kyle said he was he was on his back and he went to like prop his elbow underneath him because he wants to sit up that's part of getting

off the bottom and uh and in that move he just cracked his rib and kyle's right he was like my rib my rib and um i think did colby punch him in the bad rib twice before they ended the fight i don't know but i hope watch it again because i and i don't even know that really good with the left foot right in the ribs maybe that was oh maybe that was it maybe it's the other side it was a right kick but it's irrelevant he took a right kick that i remember if you could find the end tell me if colby sent two punches to that broken rib before it was over and i don't fault him too much because i was personally confused about what was wrong with tyron so colby might have also been or he might have just been putting

oh he heard it pop you know he heard it pop yeah probably yeah i guess that is the spot where it popped because it was damaged yeah i don't know yeah he would have his head was right on his ear was right on it he heard that thing pop those two don't like each other and i don't know if they don't like each other because colby wants what tyron had you know like if that's it or um or if there's just if they just hate each other I don't know you can see after didn't watch it with sound but you can see Woodley saying my ribs my ribs at the end as Covington is hitting he throws like three more of those like weak looking UFC punches which yeah yeah he starts working on the ribs you're right woody he started throwing some little some of these yeah oh god that's gonna hurt fucking bad so taylor the best part of this night was that colby

covington is a big donald trump supporter he was at the rally like the week before with with trump and uh when he won the fight they do this post fight thing now they don't do that thing where like the guy they they do go in the ring with mics in each other's fight, they do this post-fight thing. Now, they don't do that thing where they go in the ring with mics in each other's faces anymore. They do this thing where they sort of sequester you with a headset on like this, and you talk remotely. And you talk to Joe. Yeah. Well, Joe wasn't there, but he's talking to Megan

O'Leary or somebody. He was like, you know, you've done a great job of announcing tonight. This is the fighter. Why don't you take a break for a minute? Let me take over. And he has this rehearsed speech he drops where he's just like, if you thought that was a beating, just wait until November 3rd

when Donald Trump takes on Sleepy Joe. It's going to be a landslide. And then he just goes off attacking other fighters and calling them silly nicknames and stuff for like a solid minute and a half the champion his name is um uh kamara kamara uzman and i guess he went by marty in college a lot of um immigrants that i've known just adopt easy to pronounce american names like as a thing so they they call him marty anyway he calls him marty fake newsman instead of kamaru oosman yeah so so then he gets the actual press conference where he's sitting at

the table with you know the sponsored beverages in front of him and there's a whole crowd of media questioning him and somebody walks in the room and they're like we have a phone call from you from the president and he's like what no are you serious we have a phone call from you from the president of united states and he's like takes his headset like moves it he puts on your voice and a voice puts it on speaker and and the voice goes please hold for the president of the united states and he's just like and he has a full comment in the post gate or the post yes live on fucking espn and and uh and donald trump comes out like that was a hell of a fight that was a hell of a fight i was i just had a big rally 30 000 people and i told him i gotta get out of here gotta get home i gotta

watch that man fight i gotta watch him fight he's like you know you're a fan of me i'm a fan of you we're like two peas in a pod something close to that yeah it was great it was great yeah i just wanted to imagine trump being like are we gonna finish this in time for the fight i mean christ are we gonna get out of here and i like that i i thought i picked up something from trump that i also like he wants colby to win he's a colby fan he really is and i think he really did rush home to see it and he's like that guy was strong that guy wasn't he's like yeah he wasn't easy but you made it look easy and he's like yeah that's what I do but like he gave a little respect to Tyrone Woodley because if you look Tyrone Woodley I don't know if he's on juice or not but I he's often referred to as one of the guys with the best genetics in the history of mixed martial arts he just looks

like a perfect specimen and colby's no he looks good too but oh yeah tyrone even better and uh you're just like oh shit i want this guy to win but jesus you know he's up against tyron one of those fighters who's just like not smart about it because you know like they're just like the equivalent of the nhl like neily akapov first overall pick incredible with all his skills but he had no hockey sense like it's the opposite he's really smart for his own good he's um he's reluctant to engage um he tries to parry a lot and and sort of like lots of feints and he's really just looking for a big overhand right the whole fight and even his and he's done that for like five fights in a row and he's and he's won

it's three but yeah two i think one but one just one like one draw maybe two wins and then three losses in a row that over his last six you're in his shit out basically even his own corner even his own corner they're like you gotta throw basically is even his own corner even his own corner they're like you gotta throw them hands baby you gotta throw them hands so taylor in fighting what works well is just quickly throw a punch without telegraphing it right that's a great idea if you like load it up like you're going you know like all right here it's gonna come it's gonna come and then you throw the big one it does land harder but everyone sees it coming and it's not a good fighter who's

like ah i'm happening so this this guy tyrone woodley the mma community is having a blast with it because they're like he's been loading up that right for 15 rounds now for the last two and a half years when it lands look out world dragon ball z episode tune in next time whatever the fuck it was he's so afraid of getting caught that that he just he i watched it with my dad a second time uh day before sunday afternoon and he was just like you're right is he afraid he doesn't look like he should be afraid of anyone but he looks afraid Sunday afternoon. And he was just like, you're right. Is he afraid?

He doesn't look like he should be afraid of anyone, but he looks afraid. He's so tentative. And Colby is like a cardio phenom. So he's just pressing the action continuously. And so Tyron always ends up with his back up against the fence because Tyron's never coming back at him. So he spends 90% of the fight with his back up against the fence because tyrant's never like coming back at him so he spends 90 of the fight with his back on the fence and then he'll grab colby and just hang on for a dear life as long as he can instead of doing anything and i just want to ask him like hey man

i want to like stop the fight right here right here like run in there with a microphone so what are you trying to do right now what is your goal, no. Be honest. Like, give him the truth serum. I'm just holding on. I'm just holding on. You know, they're going to give me $200,000 for this. I just don't want to get hurt. But he got hurt. I think tentative is a really good word.

I don't know if afraid is the proper word, right? I don't think it's afraid. He's afraid of losing, but not afraid of getting hit. He's tentative, and he's just waiting for this perfect opportunity. And some other fighter was like, hey hey when you're 26 years old all you want to do is go in there and rip out your opponent eyeballs and eat them but when you're 40 you kind of want to take them to lunch so i'm watching covington and woodley go at it woodley's approaching 40 by the way he looks amazing but he is approaching 40 and uh uh you know he went for that like friendly fist bump twice colby's like the fuck no you know

and uh it just he's he's not aggressive like he was never super aggressive but when you dialed it off from where he came from now he's tentative and i've always despised him uh his i didn't like his fighting style i don't like him personally i don't like his interviews i don't like his fucking instagram live shit i don't like his rap music i don't like his opinions on why he wasn't getting as much push as some other athletes like like he's he's a race baiting loser he's a good speaker and he's smart but he he was never interesting and it takes two things to win fights good or to be a highly paid fighter. You have to be a good fighter and you have to be interesting. And he kind of just went to, like, complaining about why people didn't like him more.

You know, Joe Lozon was really popular, is really popular, I guess. But he would, like, vlog the five days leading up to the fight. He'd share the background stuff. You'd see what him and his team like it's really endearing they're like it's not just that he vlogged it it's what you saw when he vlogged it it's like oh man this is a really nice guy it's a nice guy there he's sharing beds dude joe lozon has slept with more men than anybody i know right it all the time it means it's it's the deal they pack in six people to a room sometimes you'd see him cut weight like he'd really share all this stuff and after the fight you'd see the the high of winning or the low of

losing and he shared all that and it made him a popular fighter and then of course the fights themselves he made a point of putting on entertaining fights because he's a professional fighter and you're trying to get people to want to watch you to fight tyrone or tyron i think anyway uh yeah tyron he mostly just complained that someone else didn't promote him and make him popular on his behalf and it's like bro you know even conor mcgregor's out there on instagram saying i dream of fighting here in dublin someday he's out there showing his cars his boats his lifestyle he comes in costume every time he does a damn press conference you know whether it be a big feather jacket or suit that makes him look like a leprechaun i don't know but these guys

are doing things to make themselves interesting woodley and he just wished he was that someone else made him interesting. Maybe he did. So he just doesn't or hasn't internalized it. Like, no, this is an entire show. It's not just you show up and you fight, you,

you put on the outfit, you goose it up, you make a scene, you get everybody incentivized and like, Oh man, these guys hate each other. Like maybe he was trying to, maybe he was trying to with his rap career.

But black people don't pay for pay-per-view. I didn't think of that. Like Colby. Colby was winning and about to get cut from the UFC. He was so uninteresting, right? No one gave a fuck about his boring fights. No one gave a fuck about his boring interview. They told Colby Covington,

you're going to get cut from the UFC whether you win this win this or lose it so he goes out he wins his fight it's in brazil and he's like all of you are dirty filthy fucking animals i don't care about you you all fucking suck you can go back to your mud huts or whatever the fuck you said like i'm not quoting him right but i'm on i got the tone right it was hard this guy rocks and the ufc was like you know what we're not cutting you now you're interesting so that's let me find one of his instagram videos because they're hilarious yeah he just now he's fully embraced the he's a hero all right well i guess i got a semi shit post to stay relevant jail sun and has this thing he's like look you could be a face or a heel everybody wants to be the face it's a very

crowded market but if you don't mind being the heel if you don't mind being an asshole there's job openings all over the place for that guy and colby covington spotted that and that's where he is they gotta they have to embrace being the shock master of the UFC. I don't know who the shock master is. The shock master. What do you know who the shock master is? No. He was a WWE fighter that was hyped up to be the next big guy,

where it was like, be careful. I never watched WWE, but apparently they'd have the cavalcade of evil versus the guys who are righteous. And there was a new righteous member coming aboard, and he was going to turn the tide for them. And his name was the Shockmaster. The Shockmaster. And as they're introing him,

there was a two-by-four in the drywall. I'm sorry, can I just say, the Shockmaster's costume is a star Wars helmet, like the, like storm trooper helmet covered in sparklies. Like, like it's, it's bedazzled the fucking back,

but it's clearly a storm trooper helmet. He's also wildly overweight. He's probably 275 pounds and not like stone cold steve austin 275 he's like bubba the farmer 275 i see wearing this sparkly helmet he looks like he owns a barbecue place is what he looks like and he looks terrible and he was supposed to come out as they even his like teammates were like doing their terrible wwe acting where they're like ah well you won't stand a chance once we introduce the newest member of our team the they all go shock master and then he's supposed to burst through the drywall and just be this

triumphant big guy in a fur vest and a storm trooper jacket wearing wearing you know the half pants and he comes out of there but he trips in the two by four eat shit on live tv his helmet falls off he scrambles to put it on and because it was such a bad reveal they had to turn the shock master into the the mr magoo the dunce of the w the WWE every time it'd be the Shockmaster coming out it was like and all in that moment you just know because you can see the guy just his eyes like as he realizes

his mask is off it was his big moment nobody tells him there's a 2x4 at ankle height they just tell him storm right through that area there. He does fall so hard. And, uh,

yeah, so he, he had to embrace being the heel. And so I'm sure that was a terrible day for him. It was the worst day of his life. Yeah. Colby has these Instagram videos where he's like, I don't know.

He's always bragging about fucking his hot girlfriend or he calls it bedroom cardio or something like that like like it's it's funny i enjoy it as a show it's also lame the other fighters make fun of him for it yeah like he hires models to pretend they like him and then sometimes he'll like hit on the models or something and they're like no perfect that is exact heel material but it happens off screen but yeah it's it's funny he um he wears his maga hat all the time because you know that's super divisive another part of being the heel he's taking something and taking a hard stance on something he probably doesn't even give a fuck about and i go back and forth i think he might actually be a MAGA fan, or maybe I'd just

be buying into it. I think he is, yeah. Maybe. I'm just saying, either way, it's a good plan if you're trying to pump your interest level. Yeah, I would say that if the presidential election took place on a pay-per-view night, and the only people who bought the pay-per-view voted, I think Trump would win a landslide.

Probably. Probably. I think your average ufc fan is probably a pretty conservative guy yeah well i mean it's definitely i mean what what's is the average ufc fan a white guy yes oh well then yeah obviously is that true oh yeah the overwhelming majority of white men vote republican uh it was the ufc white guy part that i wasn't oh yeah yeah it has to be. It's definitely male and it's definitely white. I just think it has to be.

Even if it's just male dominant to that level, then definitely it trends more towards the red side. It's definitely male dominant. Yeah, it's totally male dominant. That makes sense. Good for fucking him. I didn't know anything about the guy, but it seems like he's doing a good job playing into the heel thing. He's one my funny he's one of my favorites he's

very funny his instagram is great he's dumb too which is fun he's not smart i mean he's he makes some good decisions i guess there's different kinds of smart he's not eloquent he's not a good speaker he doesn't plan his words ahead he went in there with kamara uzman who's the current champion member and uh mma the subreddit just universally agreed he lost 10-8 in this debate and it's hard to win right colby goes in there he calls him fake newsman hits all his hits and uh he's like i'm gonna do this and that and kamara uzman just kept saying i broke your face we already fought i broke your face. We already fought. I broke your face. And he's trying to act like Colby's trying to act like he didn't lose. And he's like, the referee stopped the fight after I broke your face.

He's like, I protested right away. He's like, I broke your face. He had to take a year off nearly. What's his nickname? Colby. Colby. Oh, it's nothing like cool. It's not nickname. The Colby. Oh, it's like, it's nothing like cool. It's not a good one?

Because I was going to compare because the other guy, the Nigerian Nightmare, there's too many syllables. You need to shorten that a bit. Ooh, I don't know. I like the Nigerian Nightmare. I do too. I like the Nigerian Nightmare. Like when Bruce Buffard said, the Nigerian Nightmare Oozma.

Maybe I'm wrong. I just think just Nightmare would be cooler. God damn. That guy says everything so cool. That sounds like an STD. The Nigerian Nightmare. That's AIDS. Chaos.

Holy chaos, Covington. I had to look it up. Chaos is pretty good. Did you see the women's fight where the girl ate a fucking knee on the way down to the ground? Right in the middle of her face. It was excellent. I can't remember

the girl's names, but it's one of those situations where they have a very athletic girl with a six-pack versus housewife wearing the full get-up so you can't see her belly. And the housewife is just taking a real pummeling, and she's back on the fence, and she starts dropping to her butt, right?

Like doing a squat. Well, her butt's about this far off the ground, and the other girl puts a fucking knee right here in the center of her face. And the ref is like, oh, holy God, is she alive? Stop the fight. That's an illegal blow. Wait, wait, I don't actually know. That wasn't illegal.

I made a mistake. So can you still fight? She's like, yes. This is my way of telling you I don't want to. And he's like, all right, you're good to go then. Get back down on your ass. Yep, sit right there. Hey, honey, come over here.

She wants some more. The girl's coming over. She's got face tattoos. She's very pretty, but she's got like hearts and stars in the corners of her eyes. Oh, what a shame that is. She's like, all right, you get in the position that you were in. She's like, you mean standing right over her with her sitting below me? Yes, that.

All right, and go. And she knees her again. And then just continues to pummel her for like the last whatever, 90 seconds. When it was over, there was blood everywhere. There was so much blood it was that brazilian hot chick that won with via grappling do you know her story i'm trying to remember her name there's this she's from arizona and i think she got a brazilian boyfriend and she moved to brazil and she started training there. Her Brazilian accent is crazy.

Like you can hear her. She sounded like a valley girl in 2010. You listen to her now. It's like she forgot how to speak English and she speaks like a Brazilian in English. It's crazy. I've heard the accent before, but I couldn't pick her out of a lineup. Like I've heard this discussed on like the MMA subreddit. Like they've shown before and after videos of her speaking.

And it's like she's playing a character that doesn't speak good English now. Yeah. Oh, I found it. Mackenzie Derm. Can we watch this for two? Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. This is two minutes, 40 seconds long.

And she loses her... You'll see. And it's worse now, by the way. This video is from 2017. Are you guys ready? Yes. Ready, set, play. I'm a blue belt underneath my dad, Megaton Diaz.

And my background is Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. My dad's reaction when I wanted to go into MMA was, you're too pretty. She's like a West Coast vocal fry. I don't want to see my daughter getting hit. Yeah, sounds like a normal girl. I think Jiu Jitsu in Arizona is developing very rapidly. I think that we're growing, growing, growing.

We're producing a lot of champions and I think we're going to be one of the top states in the United States. A lot of the training in Brazil is more like rolling. You do a lot of just rolling in the classes. It's not as much a specific training as the United States. You do like five, like ten rounds in each training session and it's just go, go, go in the levels. It's a different level, you know. Hey guys, I'm Mackenzie Dern. I'm here in Maine for the Origin Immersion Camp and it's great and we're about to go inside and I'm going to show you guys some great techniques.

Let's go check it out. Sometimes I'll be like all lazy in the training and like my grips are weak and I'll be like, oh, I don't really want to train. And he'll just like try to make me go, go. And then like he'll say like, oh, someone's training harder than you right now. Somewhere in the world. And then I'll be like, oh man, I have to train harder. Is it creeping in now? And like back then you never fought any girls.

But my first tournament I fought a girl and I lost. Oh, wow. I was fighting and my dad told me to do something and I looked at him. And then she took me down and then I cried. Looked at him. And then I lost. And look at him. So I think I was able to see outside.

Sometimes you just need a break, you know. And I feel like maybe I was sad about the knee surgery. But maybe that's what I needed to bring me here, you to have help me put to this level you know i was missing something i yeah for sure girl i know that i found she's gonna start speaking portuguese any minute now and they treat me like a little sister you know so like they push me and kind of they push me mess me up a little bit but they like really care for me and um to help me get better so i'm like so comfortable it's like she forgot her words. I have a jiu-jitsu community. Is she eating a lot of headshots?

Kainzi, how's it been? It's been good. I've been training hard, but also I was here for vacation. Really nice team. I had to pass Christmas here and New Year's and was eating a lot of food, great food. So now it's kind of a little bit hard to come back to the training for the Europeans. I want to see you truly live.

I want to see you truly be who you are. I'm glad we stuck around to the end for that. If you had seen her in her interview with 2020 the other night, I forgot that was her. I didn't realize she was the American chick. She says she's Brazilian now. She has like a Brazilian. In the UFC when they fight, there's like a little flag next to their name

to let you know what country they're from. It's Brazil. What an asshole she is. Faking an accent like that. And that wasn't even good. I think she's training in Brazil so much she's picking it up right if you live in an area like like you'll pick up you'll pick up someone else's accent true but was she in brazil for four straight years i guess ladies and gentlemen the income i think if she's she's in one of those interviews, she was talking about training

in Brazil. So I don't know. I don't know the timeline either. Of course, I wouldn't know shit about this sport. Well, let me know when

you guys want to play among us. I'll get some together and we'll play some. Taylor, arms looking huge. Thanks, homie.

I hope you don't get upset. If I get upset, it's better content for my viewers so there we go i wasn't talking to you kyle you know how how much i care about my gaming my victory we'll see we'll see yeah we'll see I don't know PKN PKN 318