Painkiller Already - PKN 388

Episode Date: January 26, 2022

pkn 388 the last woody list pkn or is it or is it uh did you watch the video he sent in our group chat yesterday uh-uh no um i turn notifications off whatsapp because he sent a lot of pictures of him eating insects um the other day and i think i was asleep but uh i catch up every now and then every couple days i go through and read and watch everything He sent a lot of pictures of him eating insects the other day, and I think I was asleep. But I catch up every now and then. Every couple days, I go through and read and watch everything. I haven't caught up yet. I saw he looked sweaty, and he looked like he was in a jungle path.

First of all, a little compliment to Woody. When he turns, you can really see how much weight he's lost in the last year and a half, I guess it is, when he really started banging it out, the weight loss and everything. Like angular jaw, got a little forehead vein, little striation. A forehead vein? Not an angry one, just like a thin one. You know what I mean? Oh, okay. Not like a fuming. But the video he sent, he's in the back of of or it doesn't show anything like that it's just him

like clearly like flying you know driving through because all the trees and everything and all the shacks are are passing behind him and he's like well guys i got another ride and i assumed he was going to pan forward and show us that he was on the back of another bike. No, he pans forward and he is in the back of one of those Mexican trucks. It's like wood slats on the side to carry watermelons and shit. And he's the only thing back there and he's just being driven around fucking a third world country by a guy who probably thinks he's insane. Like that guy just finished his most recent cantaloupe shipment. And there woody on the side of the road offering a king's ransom to drive him you know 10 miles or whatever it is you know what he said he was going on a little trip

and i never asked if he were going alone or uh how long he were going or what he was doing exactly he's like yeah i'm going on a trip to mexico and i was like oh that sounds fun what the fuck is he doing yeah i mean he's just kind of kind of traipsing around mexico riding you know eating bugs it it doesn't seem like a fun vacation to me like when i've gone to mexico on vacation i'm going you do it a little different i'm going for the resort yeah leaving the resort because outside that resort is mexico yeah inside the resort. I'm going for the resort. I'm not leaving the resort because outside that resort is Mexico. Inside the resort is tremendous. Like they're trying to put on a good face for all the tourists. Remember when all those people were walking in streets a while back for some odd reason and the cars kept hitting them?

And I was like, yeah, you stay out of the streets because that's where the cars are. And you stay out of Mexico because that's where the mexicans are like why is he what is he doing yeah he's he's in the worst part of mexico it seems like to me um i'm like you um i've never been to uh to one of those crazy resorts um but i would imagine that the fun would be there and that the safety would be there and that the cartel would be just outside trying to lure me away for a kidnapping i'm definitely blowing it out of proportions though i'm glad he's having fun this sounds like his perfect vacation it is like it's like for me it is nightmarish what he's doing it sounds like less fun than just like going to work but for him i know woody you do you know him even better than me, this is so up his alley.

It sounds like the premise to a horror movie, right? I watched a horror movie once. I don't even remember the name anymore, but it's a bunch of teenagers in Mexico, and I think they find some guy who drives a fruit truck or something to take them way back there to show them

one of those, you know those ziggurats or whatever they have? Yeah, let us go back there to show them one of those, you know those ziggurats or whatever they have? Yeah, let us go back there and look at the one that nobody gets to look at, the one that's all overgrown, and they get back there and there's some sort of disease or insect or parasite or something. They're all itchy

and their skin's sloughing off. It's real fucked up. It's like body horror stuff. That's what could happen to Woody. That's what you're risking. You're risking some sort of evil when you go to that part of Mexico. Everyone knows that. There could be a hyper

venomous bug. They're discovering new bugs all the time. You get bit by that. Are they going to have the anti-venom you need? Like arachnophobia. That's the premise of arachnophobia. There you go. I saw that. I remember walking by that movie so many times at blockbuster and seeing the cover and being or no you know what i'm not thinking of arachnophobia i'm thinking of eight-legged freaks oh that's a bad movie yeah yeah i remember walking by and it's the one dude from like he was

like a 90s like b-list guy running from a poorly cgi'd even the even the spider on the cover is bad CGI. Isn't it David Arquette? I thought that was a David Arquette movie. It feels like one. That's a bad movie but I will say those CGI spiders even in that kind of creep me out because I dislike spiders so much. Yeah, I don't care for bugs. I just watched

the first I guess my wife and I watched, it was either the first episode of The Witcher season 2 or the first and second we watched. i watched it was either the first episode of the witcher season two or the first and second we watched the one where he fights that big uh millipede yeah yeah yeah i think that's my favorite or maybe second favorite monster so far i i liked the millipede they it's still kind of silly like when when it's killed and like the head rolls off it's very it's a bad cgi right there as i was watching and i'm like god damn it i wish they just would have like had it die just fall down dead instead of this like faux dramatic cgi head bouncing in a

way that like objects don't tend to bounce but that oh is it the one where it was chasing the little girl he was chasing the little girl yeah yeah girl uh finishes off in the end obviously yeah i'm liking the little girl character she was always probably my second favorite to gerald little girl yeah she's got that um she's got that hermione thing going on where like you know one day she's gonna be hot like it's like it's you know it's like when you got like a little green tomato on the vine and you're like ah that'll that'll be the good one see what you know you're not gonna eat the green tomato no and you fry it first if you did and those are delicious i love a nice fried green tomato but uh that i something i'm worried about with that young girl character even though i liked

that she's kind of on the witcher path now which makes because i think the witchers are the coolest like subgroup so far probably by design because it's called the fucking witcher yeah and they have like a nice mix of of magic and physicality unlike the mages all those guys and gals it's all magic no physical yeah they're like a hybrid of everybody, right? They're like a physical badass. They seem to have some crazy instincts and sharpened skills, obviously. But then they seem to be able to do a little magic, some potions and stuff. They're kind of a do-it-all.

Every now and then they find a specialist, right? Like if somebody's poisoned, maybe they get some potion guy or a fancy spell to get a mage. But the Witcher seems to be able to do just about anything he wants at a basic level it seems like he or maybe it's witchers as a whole have some level of like magic resistance and so yeah like these major or not some level of a significant level of it and so it's like the mages are all like big dick in around regular soldiers and then it's nice to see them get a little spooked when a witcher's about where it's like yeah that's good it's kind of a rock paper scissors world but regarding the little girl i like her character arc so far

but it with like the added dirt on her face and stuff it's very clear they're like trying to age her faster than she should be aging in the story like is there a bunch of time travel in this like see what i don't want to happen is season three for them to be pretending that this girl actress is like 22 and she's aged it's like she just she didn't look much younger in season one and that's all like makeup driven because it's just one year of time but yeah she's mostly just dirty i think that i've seen um so i didn't read the books or anything and i don't know the lore super well like i'm sure a bunch of people listening do and they'll be frustrating but uh in the in the game the parts that i played of the game

anyway um i think she's a child like the whole time like throughout the story like okay that's better i was i just i don't i don't want that age progression shit yeah i don't think that's going to happen um and they've already proved they're not very good at it uh the aging and the age watch the fucking irishman the technology's not there dude i thought the irishman was good i think the reason movie but no no i think the cgi i think that's good i i think it only looks bad because we know what robert de niro looked like yeah but like when robert Robert De Niro was doing physical scenes as a guy. All right, well, that's a different thing. His arms are all, he's got John McCain arms.

They don't work right. You know what I mean? So he's throwing punches from the waist when he's trying to be tough. That's where they should have maybe completely deep faked a guy. So they ran into the same issue when they did star wars um when they did the mandalorian i think i you didn't watch that did you you're not into that i saw a few episodes okay well like like here's a little there's a spoiler here for the mandalorian for those of you who care and for some reason i put it off it's excellent but luke skywalker

like shows up at the end of season one and it's a big deal and they didn't know what to do right because mark hamill is always happy to show up if they're paying uh and uh even if they're embarrassing his character i guess but uh i think they went back and forth and i think they ended up using and a different actor that they were putting like mark hamill's face on like they did it a couple different ways like they did it i think i think they were going to try to do it like, yeah, let's throw Mark Hamill out there and de-age him, but they ended up doing this other actor that looks a lot like him, and they did some sort of

de-age deep fake thing over the other actor. I thought that came out pretty good. The problem with it is, if you know what that character looked like when they were young, then you just... They can't get that right. It's no um in guardians of the galaxy did you see when they de-aged uh kurt russell i don't remember that's all right guardian galaxy guardians of the galaxy 2 has a de-aged

kurt russell pretty fucking good like like even though you know remember what kurt russell used to look like it's like that's pretty close that's pretty close. That's pretty close. That'll do. That'll do. I might be being too hard on the Irishman then, because like thinking about it, the reason I rewatched the Irishman was because I had just watched Taxi Driver again. Fuck yeah. And so I was like, De Niro. Let me just go on fucking my smart TV and search De Niro and see

what else is up there. Oh, Irishman, we rewatched that. I don't think I was paying full attention. That's, it is, it's a shame that whole era just by virtue of the fact they're all getting so old and they're going to age out of it like the Scorsese, Pesci, De Niro, like they're all gonna

like that era is pretty much gone. Like the Irishman is probably the last movie from those guys that we're going to get. They're all in like that that era is pretty much gone like the irish is probably the last movie in from those guys that we're gonna get they're all in the late 70s yeah they're done they're done but but the truth is that those guys did made a lot of stinkers in between that just get forgiven um especially especially uh you know not scorsese that you know most of his movies are i don't include i can't think of a bad one the Scorsese kind of well like Pacino's so strong when he wants well I'm thinking of just the actors I'm thinking of Pacino and um and De Niro in particular like like um Joe Pesci just kind of stopped working after he got to a certain age he didn't want to be the old actor and he didn't

think he could still do it and he does look like a little old man so uh but but the other two like they just kept making those shit movies that and they kept making them together every now and then like like just the real sellouts is what it feels like to me because i think both those gentlemen had plenty of money for a long time they should have shown what every alone kevin bucks yeah well i mean no they did plenty of work like they like they should have done what every other respectable actor does when he gets to a certain age and either like continue to do roles well or retire like like gene hackman did like nicholson did and um also uh i mean clint eastwood is the other end of the coin right where he just keeps finding

roles for real old men who are like feeling their extreme age and he plays that role i don't mind i don't mind that with Eastwood because it's clear he's one of those guys that if he were to stop acting, he'd be dead. Some people are like that. They stop working and then they die. They need their work. Yeah, he needs his work.

And so it's almost like, yeah, I'll play another 93-year-old if it'll get me to 94, just trying to not die. I think that guy's really smart. And I think that he's got... If it'll get me to 94, you know, just trying to not die. I think that guy's really smart. And I think that he's got, he's one of those guys that, I've talked about it before, but like, he's got a lot of foresight with his career and stuff.

I wouldn't be surprised if he's got like a role for like a 98 year old retiree or something. And he's just, yeah, I bought that script in the seventies, but you know but I was 22 and doing a lot of coke back then. I figured one day I'd be 99 and this would be perfect for me because that's what he did with Unforgiven. He bought the rights to Unforgiven and he was like, yeah, but I'm 35. I can't play this character. He waited like 15 or 20 years and played it in his late 40s when he was the right age to play that character. That's impressive. That is good foresight. That's my favorite movie of his it's excellent and i can't remember you know i really need to

go back and watch his westerns like his old westerns because i maybe seen like one or two of those at my grandparents house when i was a kid so you remember like uh in once upon a time in hollywood when yeah uh brad pitt's, or not Brad Pitt's character, Leonardo DiCaprio's character is lamenting that he has to go to, I gotta go make Italian Westerns. Don't let the mix concede you crying. There's that whole bit of nonsense.

And that was how it was seen at the time. But Clint Eastwood went over there and he did exactly that. He went and made those spaghetti Westerns, as they were called. Italian made Western movies movies. Sergio Leone was directing these things. The way I understand that it was made, and maybe I'm wrong about this, but what I've read is that he just hired actors. He didn't care what languages they spoke.

The script would be in their language, so they could act it out well. When we're done, we'll just get some other guys to do all the voices though. Right. And they all, we got, we got 30 guys that speak French, 30 that speak Italian.

And we got, and so they would just dub, dub them over. So if you go back and watch, um, I think it's referred to as the dollars series, you know, like for a few dollars more,

um, I'm spacing out cause I'm sweating this pen, but it's, um, for a few dollars more dollars, fistful of dollars.'m swiping this pen. But it's for a few dollars more. Fistful of dollars. Fistful of dollars, and then there's another one. They're supposed to be sort of an unofficial trilogy. Those can be good, the bad, and the ugly is the other one.

Those are iffy for some people. For me, I really like the good, the bad, and the ugly, and I can leave the other two. I like Lee Van Cleef in those as a co-star. But the good, the bad, and the ugly, and I can leave the other two. I like Lee Van Cleef in those as a co-star, but the good, the bad, the ugly is really good, but the best one to me is The Outlaw Josie Wales for his old westerns, and then The Unforgiven is my favorite one of all time, but obviously he's older, and it's not like the old ones. High Plains Drifter is good. He's made a lot of really really good ones but i really like i really like uh the outlaw josie wales i think he's more of a badass in that one than he is in just about any of them he's just the whole movie is just one-liners and people like tell being

being like that's josie wales josie wales everybody like everybody's heard of him like like he's like famous in the West. It's like that South Park, oh, Ben Franklin, oh, Ben Franklin, oh, Ben Franklin. The backstory in this one is that it's the Civil War, and a lot of people don't know about this,

but there were these guys called Redlegs who were Union unofficial soldiers who would ride through the South doing terrorism. Oh, I didn't even know that. Yeah, they'd come down and burn farms and rape and pillage and uh do like a terrorism thing in the south the same was true um and in response yeah it's war there tends to be terrorism yeah sure and in response the south like a bunch of guys got together and like and uh and so that's what

happens clint eastwood's family is killed by these red legs or whatever. They come down, kill his family, almost kill him. He joins with some Southerners. They show up, and he's standing there with his family burnt alive and everything. He's all beat up. The guy's like, Red legs? Yeah. We're going up south. We're going up north. Set a few things right.

Clint Eastwood looks up and he goes, I'll be coming with you and then the music kicks off and it's just like a montage of them like riding horses and stuff and like fucking shit up it's it's really good and so then the union army finally comes up well we've signed a peace treaty all y'all come forward give us your gun sign the paper and like clint eastwood's the only one who's like we're good we're good it's we're not done yet so like the whole movie is him being like a southern renegade um like riding west trying to get away and just killing anything and everything he runs into pretty much um it's uh

it's it's it's like real dry humor and uh real real classic western shit it's good do they have like a scene in there because he's a southern guy of like him not being racist yes to be like whoa he's a southern guy but he's not even racist yeah i can be on this guy's side so there are i don't remember any black people in the movie but there's um there's a couple of instances of other people being cruel to Native Americans and Clint Eastwood being like, no, you're not going to do that. Actually, give them everything you have.

You know what? Don't give the kids a piece of candy. They want jars of candy. That's a different movie, actually. This one, too. In a lot of his movies, he was... I'm a southerner. He often wasn't the cowboy like go gun down a bunch of indians in his movies that's one thing i john wayne was the guy who was always slaughtering indians but uh clint was always killing white people pretty much for the most part he would find a peaceful solution with the

indians if he could that's good that's pretty progressive of him yeah very progressive um and he'd also kill white folks and he'd also cast whoever was fucking his as his co-starring role it was great yeah i mean that's since the beginning of of time i can't remember i guarantee like fucking whoever uh homer you know was like well you know the odyssey and the iliad were passed down for hundreds and hundreds of years. But if Homer was there and he was overseeing the play, he'd be like, well, you know, little boy, you can play the leading lady. Oh, no. If you suck my dick. And he's like, what do you mean suck your dick?

Oh, God. How good is the boy actor? That sounds like a toddler. I mean, he was a bad guy. People don't talk about the good parts of Homer. They don't talk about the bad parts. grasp on latin is tenuous at best yeah that was that was one of the first like history books i read like in its entirety it actually wasn't the odyssey it was the iliad yeah also homer but like i had to read that

like full through my freshman year of college and i enjoyed it it was good remind me of so i know the odyssey um correct me if i'm wrong but um what's the character's name it's uh is it it's not it's a disius that's what it is so it is is called uh fourth by his king to go fight the trojan war it goes he's badass it's actually his idea to come up with the trojan horse they go in troy falls but uh he doesn't uh give praise to poseidon i think or something like that yeah and so poseidon basically keeps fucking him over on his journey home cursing him and it takes like let's call it 20 years to get home to his wife comes home wreck shit great story when he comes home and fucks with the suitors that's the best

part i love that part yeah yeah. Yeah. Because they're just, and, but like, I also, even at the time reading it, when he's fucking with the suitors, I was like, dude, you were gone.

No call, no show for 28 years, whatever it is. Like roughly you can't possibly be mad. Yeah. Let's say 15, 15 years, even if it was 15,

like no, no calls, no, no information from the gods that he was still alive. Like, you really expect your wife to just, like, sit around waiting for 15 years? Not only does he, but when he gets back, he, like, tests her. He comes back in the guise of an old man, and he walks into his villa. Because he's not a poor guy. Like, he he's a step below a king himself it seems like he's like a nobleman who has like an estate and so because he's been gone this time these men these suitors they're there for a legal right they're there because like ma'am your husband's dead we all know he's dead you have to remarry you can't just be a noble woman with all these lands and stuff.

You've got to marry one of us. Pick someone. It doesn't have to be me. I'm not trying to be pushy here. Pick the fat guy. Pick the skinny guy. And they're not losers. They're all successful businessmen.

They're kind of the oligarch class of that region. Yeah, they're the guys she has to pick from. They're the noble-h men of the of the region and so adepus or odysseus shows up and they're slapping his son around and fucking drinking his wine and fucking his slave girls and and and he's just like what the fuck one of them bashes a chair over his back he's there as an old cripple and one of the suitors is like look at that old fuck smash and like smashes a chair over and so he realizes that like these guys are pieces of shit and uh at the end when like his son is like 15 like he's

never even met his son before but he like hey he's like yo it's me he's like fuck who met you who who the fuck are you but there's that part where he's just like look stay chill we're gonna handle this it's it's gonna be it's gonna be good tomorrow's just like, stay chill. We're going to handle this. It's going to be good. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. And all the slaves are fucking locking the doors so the suitors can't get out. The wife has come forward with a test, finally. We're going to figure out...

I'm going to pick a suitor. The man who can string the bow of Odysseus and fire an arrow through nine axe handles will be my husband. And what I mean by nine axe handles at the bottom of an axe handle there's this ring so he has to fire the arrow through nine holes essentially and then hit a target at the end and just stringing the bow is like impossible because the bow is like this double ram horn thing you have to like put your leg around and then bend

with all your body's might and then hook the string onto and all these big burly suitors are over there fucking it up they throw the they throw the bow on the ground they're like that's impossible no man can do this and they throw it at the feet of the old man the old beggar and he picks it up and he fucking strings it one go like it's nothing and they all go what like none of them can even string the bow and And then he just thunk. And the arrow goes through all nine. And when it hits the target, they all look at the target and then look back to Odysseus, and he's transformed. He's no longer the old man.

In fact, he might be the best-looking Odysseus we've seen the whole movie. He's greased up. Somebody's oiled him. It's been 15 years. A little touch of gray. A little touch of gray. A little touch of gray. Silver Fox Odysseus now.

But he's greasy and that means he's ready to go he's like tom hardy in them grease me he's ready to go and and he like looks at his boy he's like now you can fight and the kid just goes and like spears the biggest suitor like into the wall like like yeah yeah the tv movie like is awful but that scene alone's worth like sitting through the whole thing. I went through all that to ask you, what the fuck is the Iliad? Because I'm blanking out. It's

just a lot of the same characters. Yeah, but what do they do? I don't remember what they do. I don't remember much of the Iliad. The Iliad and the Odyssey kind of blend together. I just remember I had to read both of them. I think the Odyssey first and the Iliad second. And I remember enjoying the Iliad more because it was more brutal there was a lot fighting in the iliad does the iliad have like the trojan war in it because i remember the odyssey

has like the cyclops reference to the trojan war but it's not it's not present at the time yeah yeah i know i'll have to reread it but i've got so many things i want to read before that i still got to finish the last book of the stormlight archive i finished that uh needful things stephen king book oh it was one of the i'm not going to spoil it for anyone who wants to read it but it's it's it starts out so promising with the the it's one of those like stephen king is a master of premise like a tremendous premise that that gets you hooked the world itself is so interesting whoa satan or you know who people suspect to be a demon or some sort of magic man comes into your little town he starts selling things for free but they all have little curses attached to them like it's given it's fascinating like all the little ways he's like oh this person

was fat and they bought a mirror and the mirror will always show them exactly what they want to see. And so then they like eat themselves to death. That's just an example of what could have happened there. Oh, I'm familiar with the premise. It's so interesting. And then it kind of just peters out and ends. Like he often does that.

The ending of Stephen King books, it's like he doesn't know how to wrap it up. Not that I could do any better. No, agreed. Actually, I take that back. I know how to wrap it up. Not that I could do any better. No, agreed. Actually, I take that back. I think we could. I think we could because we often do. We often do. We really do. Do you remember that show, The Outsiders, or The Outsider on HBO that we were like

really into? The supernatural one where like I think children were being like butt raped to death or something? Did I watch that one? If you haven't, I won't go any further and you really should. Although the last episode is a bit of a downer. Probably outsiders.

Yeah. On HBO. It's a, it was a mini series. It was maybe six or eight episodes. Like a, um, it's either the outsider or the outsiders.

I can't remember if it's plural or not, but, Oh no, I did watch this. It has that, uh, the actor with the, the lisp who's really good.

I can't think of who that is. Ben Mendelsohn, that looks like what his name is. The detective. The detective guy. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Who has that little lish-esque thing. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I really, really like that.

And I think that's a great example of an amazing premise. I remember while I was watching it, I'd be on the phone with my dad. I'd be like, yeah, there's some sort of a monster. I can't even remember exactly how the monster works. I remember the monster is invisible most of the time, that only certain people can see it or only if it wants you to. There was that part where it's so supernatural that the woman makes test to like determine if it really came into her house or not. And it's really scary because it seems like it feeds on like. Like, like, like, like the sadness or the pain of children or something.

And it's always it kept framing like people for like child rape, like murders, rape murders. And I don't remember the fine details. I do remember the ending was not good. It was just, it was like a four out of 10 ending that was just like, come on. We spent eight episodes figuring this out. We figured it out. Now we know where it lives and we're gonna go and you're gonna mess that part up like that's the that's like the end of the hero's journey

like we're there to slay the dragon or whatever and they just sort of went and and the ending was just like wait wait wait we're not gonna go in there and like get on top of them and start ground and pounding there's not gonna be like a magical spear or a fucking scientist with a beaker like no well that's that's kind of lame it's kind of disappointing it's it's frustrating when endings are bad um i watched this movie i probably talked about it before i can't remember the end the uh the name of it again i'm sorry basically it's um it's one of those movies where it sort of like starts almost it feels like 20 minutes in and you're kind of left like wait what all right so for through context clues this man is really missing

his girlfriend it seems like she's a mainstay of his life she's not around anymore and he's living by himself out in this little country house it seems like town's maybe 10 minutes away and he knows the sheriff because he's called him out because he keeps seeing some weird stuff at night and he keeps like drinking and being sad over this girl and wondering where she's gone she just left it seems like that they were on the verge of maybe stepping this thing up to like a fiance type type thing rather than just a serious living girlfriend and and then she just leaves with like like like and and and meanwhile he's being terrorized at night by a monster an actual monster like like a physical thing that's trying to get in the house and uh the ending of that was so excellent and unexpected um i'm gonna find it um because i want to like i want you to

watch this because i think you'd enjoy it it's uh it's the ending was so good i will watch something like that if it has a good ending. Try and find it because I'm looking for more stuff to watch, particularly like the thriller horror kind of genre where it's like a mystery. Mystery horror, whatever you would call it. I guess thriller horror. That's probably my favorite genre of movie.

And it doesn't have to be good. I enjoy bad movies almost as much as I enjoy good ones. You have to like not take it seriously and be stoned to shit yeah man i wish i could remember this if i see the um the artwork for it i'll remember it it's got it's got a heart i remember there's like a heart built into the artwork and kind of a a quirky, smart way. Is it a documentary about Viva La Bam's band? Is that true? Or the band he liked? Was it CKY? Was CKY the band they had that had the heart?

Or no, him. Him was the band with the heart around it, right? Oh, I honestly don't know. This is called After Midnight, though. The movie's called After Midnight. After Midnight, though. The movie's called After Midnight. After Midnight, okay. I'll check that out. That's got a cool logo.

Yeah, the heart with the antlers and the arrows sticking out. I like that. I'm going to leave this page up so I don't forget. I highly recommend anybody who's wanting to watch it, don't read into it at all. Just go get into it. You'll't read into it at all. Just like, go get into it. Like,

like you'll think you've got it figured out and, uh, and then they'll twist it a little at the end. It's, it's fun. And I don't remember it being very long. I do remember loving the ending. Uh,

you were talking about, you know, endings are hard to do. Um, I, I, I like when things are wrapped up in a bow. I can,

I can have things be ambiguous and, uh, I, they can end on a downer. You remember that movie, The Road, where Viggo Mortensen is trying to get his son to some sort of... Yeah, that's a sad movie. Post-apocalyptic, cannibalistic, ruined America, like skies are blacked out, and he's just so filthy and scared the whole movie, and the whole movie is centered around this gun he's got with filthy and scared the whole movie and then the the whole movie is is centered around this gun he's got with either one or two bullets and the decision about what to do with

those bullets because the the decision the most likely decision is that he's going to use that bullet to kill his son first for sure so that the cannibals don't get him it's so fucked and at the end of the movie it's it's just dark it's a real real dark ending but at least they wrap it up it's like okay all right all right have you i was thinking of vigo mortensen movies other than lord of the rings but have you seen him in eastern promises i knew you were going to say eastern promises it is because that movie's awesome it is excellent he is sort of a supporting character in that movie that the lady who's is that naomi watts yeah she's uh she's kind of the the main character she's trying to find those prostitutes or whatever he is essential he's got the cool russian accent he's got the tattoos and he has maybe the coolest

naked fight scene ever in that movie dude definitely the coolest naked fight scene ever in the bathhouse when they're all and there's yeah it's brutal and i've ever seen a naked fight and it's like a continuous shot from what i remember there weren't like hardly any cuts yeah at least in that initial brawl before they like pan over to like the shower side of it it reminds me it reminds me a lot of in casino royale that uh that fight they have in like a uh a stairwell it's a like the blows as they land they feel really meaty and like it's i don't know. Like some movies, you'll watch like a guy get hit in the ribs and you're like, oh, that wasn't a devastating shot because it didn't hit the head.

But in this, it's like funk, like you're hitting a side of beef as hard as you can. Yeah. Like that resonating sound. And you're like, oh, that is what it would be like to get hit in the ribs. While you're naked in a Russian bathhouse. Yeah, and I believe it's a knife fight. I want to say that's a knife fight. It is, yeah. The guys come in with a knife, and he steals the knife, I think,

at one point and does some damage. He's naked, and they're both clothed, and he kills them both, I'm pretty sure, with their own knife. Yeah, I think there's some fat Russian guy sitting there who's not aligned with anyone. Just like trying to, you know, get my balls.

Nice. And yeah, he might, he might catch a little collateral damage of that. That's a damn good movie though. Yeah. Eastern promises. If anybody out there doesn't see Eastern promises,

that's a great movie. If you, if you like that and you want to stay on the Viggo Mortensen kick, you could watch history of violence. That sounds so familiar. I don't know if I've seen that all right all right so you're gonna i i'm surprised you haven't seen it do you remember the archer episode where archer had forgotten his memory and he's like working at bob's burgers yeah yeah that is the that is the opening scene of eastern promises being parodied eastern promises is about a guy who used to be a badass

mob hitman or something. I think he's like amnesiac. History of violence, you mean, right? History of violence. That's what I said. I'm not sure what I said. It's history of violence. He's now working as a small town burger flipping, diner owning husband and wife.

Or husband and father. These guys come in. Ed harris comes in he's got he's got like a i don't he's got like an accent i can't remember chicago or new york but he's just like mickey funny seeing you here and it's just like oh no um but it's it's a good movie like oh no no i remember what it was like like you don't see ed harris until later on because he's the big bad but two guys come in and try to make some trouble and ed harris just has our uh vegal mortis it goes into like muscle memory mode and murders the shit out of both of them in a very hardcore kind of way it's a very violent movie like when people get shot it's it's like you were talking about how the the the was in Eastern Promises. In History of Violence, when people get shot, it's like they explode.

It's almost like Tarantino style. It's almost too much. And so Viggo Mortensen does a really good job in this movie because he starts remembering the gangster that he used to be. I think literally. I think he had amnesia or something. But there's two sex scenes in that movie. It might have Naomi Watts.

It's got a Naomi Watts-looking actress in it, like some pretty blonde lady who was like 35 at the time. But anyway, he fucks her at the beginning, and it's just like this romantic sex scene. But then as he starts remembering who he used to be, he just slam fucks her on the stairs halfway through it as he starts remembering. I have not seen this movie.

I need to watch History of Violence if it's one of Viggo Mortensen's best, because I don't know if it's one of his best, but like it's Ed Harris is really good. Like I really like Ed Harris as a villain. Like, do you remember enemy at the gates with the Vasily Zaitsev movie where they're,

they're in a solid Grodd. Yeah. I just pulled his, his face up. Yeah. This guy is great. I wouldn't have been able to tell you who that was. Yeah.

He's solid. Love Ed Harris and anything. I mean, he's, he's been good in everything i've ever seen him and remember like he was the guy who actually decided to act in um um that asteroid movie with bruce willis yeah like everybody else like everybody else was just goofing around and like he showed up and like gave a-jerker performance. He's like the separated father. His wife won't let him see the son. He's like, can I see him?

Because I got something big. No, that's not Ed Harris. That's a different fucking actor. Never mind. Forget it. God damn it. I saw Ed Harris is in Snowpiercer, the movie. Speaking of that series, is that done?

New season just began. It's funny you brought that up. New season just started. Okay. Wait, what's it on again? They don't release the whole season all at once, right? I don't know. I think it comes out in a subway episode.

It ain't Netflix. Where is it? Something. Regardless. It's something. I want to watch that i wasn't sure if that was one of like the amazon shows or whatever that like they get two seasons in and they're like oh that's yeah nobody's into this nobody's liking it that much we're gonna pull

it but hopefully they continue because i like and ozark just came out i'm i need to get through season two of ozark or i'm sorry it's season two of the witcher my wife and i need to get through season two of ozark or i'm sorry it's season two of the witcher my wife and i need to watch like the last i think there's only 10 episodes eight episodes per season with the witcher so i think yeah like we only have like six more seven more and then i want to do ozark i'm so excited have you started the new ozark yet i didn't know it was out someone mentioned it to me dude every time you're on netflix it's fucking promoting it for me i haven't i don't open netflix unless i hear something is new because they just netflix is kind of bad it's mostly garbage yeah i've considered canceling it several times but i i don't know i

know i'm going to want to see trailer park boys or some nonsense that's on there and end up signing back up uh it's the same way peacock got me to sign up for their bullshit service that has like two things on it. I'm paying like $4 a month for the office and parks and rec, I guess. And that's it. Two shows that are basically carbon copies of one another. I think I get some like NBC sports stuff too. Maybe like, like maybe some hockey,

but obviously you don't give two shits about that. I mean, your, your team, and I know you're stoked about this, the Colorado avalanche, two shits about that. I mean, your team, and I know you're stoked about this, the Colorado Avalanche, the team that Kyle has supported for a year is... For a year!

For a year! Year and year he's supported them. They are the best team in the NHL. I can pick them, baby! Oh, you can pick them, baby, because Colorado is the best team in the league by far right now. They're dominating everybody they come across. You ready to do another bracket? Yeah. You know what?

I want to do another bracket, and I want to once again do my absolute best, considering I watch so many. My wife just the other night was like, her mom was here. A couple other people were here. They were doing some stuff, and something came. It was during the day, and I was like, well, there's a here. A couple other people were here. They were doing some stuff and something came. It was during the day. And I was like, well, there's a game at eight that I want to watch. And she was like, is it the blues are playing tonight?

And I'm like, no, no, I want to watch the Colorado fucking Calgary game, whatever it was. And she's like, you don't need to be watching every game that comes on. It's like, no, I want to watch. I want I enjoy. watching every game that comes on it's like no i want to watch i want i i enjoy like no i i love watching the sport of hockey i enjoy the movement i i because it's the only sport i'm familiar enough with that like as a play is developing i'm like oh i know exactly what's happening right now i i know what that defenseman is trying to do to that left winger i know what the right winger over there where he's trying to make himself open.

Whereas like if I were watching football, which I'm not that familiar with, I don't know the pieces moving throughout the play. I just know like, Oh, that guy seems open. Oh, he didn't throw it to him.

Why didn't he throw it to the open guy? Oh, because the quarterback was being pressured from that side and he couldn't throw over the, the defenders, whatever. But hockey, there was something else going on with with hockey news uh and it's not hockey related really it was you know how like

shit will happen and people will react to it in a way that is totally like remember the this is an extreme example remember like years and years ago when reddit thought that they caught the boston bomber yeah and they basically doxed and terrorized the totally wrong guy just a totally 100 innocent guy got terrorized and fucked with so this isn't nearly as extreme as that but basically so there's a uh's the NHL, and then there's the AHL, and then there's the ECHL, and a couple other very minor leagues that still have fans and stuff and smaller. Like Boise, Idaho has an ECHL team, and a couple thousand people maybe go every game. If that, it's not a big thing. people maybe go every game. It's not an, if that, it's not a big thing, but basically there was an ECHL game and Jordan Subban, who is a black player, the younger brother of PK Subban, who is

an NHL defenseman, obviously black, also their brothers. And PK Subban has been in the league for many years. He's a defenseman. He used to actually be very, very good in the last four years or so. He's really dropped off. And now he's he's like a one of those those guys where it's like man remember what that guy used to be like now he just costs too much money to stand around and he capitalized basically his younger brother jordan subban in an echl game got in a brawl like a like a tussle not a full-on fist fight with this guy named like Jacob, Jacob something. I don't remember his last name. And they were in this big fight and Jacob,

the guy gave like this muscle man. What he says is like a muscle man. Like, Oh, you're so tough. You're, Oh, you're big and tough when the ref has you.

Oh, you're big and tough. Like doing that. And this guy, the, the black guy, Jordan, like went off and tough like doing that and this guy the the black guy jordan like went off and was like this guy was making like monkey uh stuff at me he was saying that like like he basically said

like he said he was doing like that oh not kind of thing and and which would obviously be absurdly racist and unacceptable but like and and immediately pk suban who has a large twitter online presence the older brother of the of his younger brother obviously and he starts going like at jacob whatever his name is why'd you delete your accounts you were being racist to my brother you should like stuff like that and everyone immediately is is like the whole hockey Reddit, which the commenters on Reddit are the dumbest people alive, largely. They all agree with one another, and they all jack each other off and sniff each other's farts all day.

And people who don't get downvoted to oblivion. And there were huge threads like, this is the most unacceptable thing ever. This is such a bad look for hockey. And it's like the guy Jacob made a video, like a response to it. And he's a young guy. He and Jordan Subban, the guy they're in a tussle with, they're both young guys because they're in the ECHL, but they're both 26. If you're 26 in the ECHL, I'm so sorry.

You're not going to make it to the show. There's no chance you're going to dominate so hard in the ECHL at 26 that you go to the AHL and then you dominate that much harder level of competition. And then you miraculously make it to the highest level of competition on earth. It's not going to happen. Not that that really matters, but this guy, Jacob came out and he made a YouTube video or a Twitter post. And he's like, I have been inundated. You know, he's talking about, and he's like, voice is shaking. He's like scared And he's like, I have been inundated. You know, he's talking about, and his like voice is shaking. He's like scared because he's like at the behest of like an online mob. The media as a whole hates him, you know, Sue band and all these like big NHL name players

are coming out, hating him. And he makes a video and he's like, I was not doing anything racist, uh, at all. What I literally said to him as we were like as the refs were coming up to us is once jordan got grabbed by the ref you know i was going oh yeah you're big and tough when the refs are between us aren't you you're you're so big and strong when you're between us and he is doing this he's doing like the oh you're such a big strong guy oh you're such such a big strong guy and that is obviously like on on rewatch everyone should be able to go yeah he's clearly doing big strong guy oh you're a big tough man aren't you when the refs are between us and then the the hockey reddit does that other stupid reddit shit or any forum where like a little bit of evidence comes out to the contrary and they're like well this this seems compelling but it doesn't mean that he wasn't racist

and it's like and then it's like another commenter was like are there any videos of him doing this to other competitors and I saw this other guy post he's like yeah here's one and there's a video of this same guy jacob going you're so big and strong to like some other guy who's white and so it's like such an obvious example of like everybody loving that dopamine hit of like oh yeah oh i'm not racist and everybody knows it yeah yeah oh i'm not racist and everybody knows i'm a good guy oh laud me laud me with your praise like that kind of shit is what you see and then these fucking pansy ass pussy media people and commenters as soon as evidence comes out that they were dyed in the wool wrong and and this echl team by the way immediately released that player destroyed terminated his contract that guy's professional

hockey days are likely over on what was totally a misfire. Totally. The fact that you're this passionate about a minor incident that happened in ECO hockey somewhere. And what state? What team was it? No idea. Could not tell you. Was it even in this country?

Well, yeah, it was in this country. It was in the East Coast Hockey League. The minor, minor league. Ah, I, it was in this country. It was in the East Coast Hockey League, the minor, minor league. Ah, I thought it might be a Canadian thing. Yeah, you're a bit of a hockey fan. No, I don't follow anything. I don't think as much as you follow hockey, even though I am a world champion, Atlanta Brave, and George Bulldog.

It's been a good fucking year for Georgia. It's been a tremendous year for Georgia. You're getting the Thrashers back. Are we? No, you're not getting the Thrashers back. Third time's the charm. Oh, my God. I mean, I don't know.

That would be awesome. I think they should take... I mean, the Arizona Coyotes are totally failing. Like, they've never worked, ever. It was a team. Yeah. Yeah, the Arizona Coyotes. Isn't. Like, they've never worked. I know there's a team. Yeah. Yeah, the Arizona Coyotes. Is that the Gretzky team?

Which one did he, like, own or coach or something? I think he does own some of the Coyotes somehow. I don't know the inner workings. Poor investment. Yeah, poor investment. Well, but, I mean, it's a sports league, and so they all, like, share Well, but I mean, it's a sports league, and so they all share revenue like the way the NFL does.

So it's basically there are losing teams and winning teams. And so every year, teams like Toronto and Vancouver have to bail out Arizona and Carolina. The way that, I don't know new jersey and oklahoma probably bail out alabama every year yeah sure are there do we look it up once and like some states are like like losers like like they don't make money like like as far as like federal federal dollars are speaking like they take in more than they uh spend or something like that yeah i think there's something like i think a lot of those are uh like farming federal subsidies and so it'll be like nebraska what a loser state and it's like well those are enormous soybean

subsidies that they're receiving it's not like everyone in nebraska's on fucking welfare i'm just looking for an excuse to shit on alab Yeah, well, fuck you, Alabama. Actually, don't let them live in your head rent-free. You won. They're the losers. They are the ones who should be like, we're still better than Georgia. Look at all the previous championships we have. How much does your

state depend on federal funding? Well, that's nice. Looks like Alabama is a nice dark blue. You can scroll over and see the presents man missouri doing pretty hot yep yep same as georgia and woody's state taken more than either of our states not acceptable alaska is just a real money pit apparently alaska new mexico west virginia alabama new mexico and alaska get your shit together can i i've said i've been to three of those i haven't been to alaska the other three fucking suck west virginia is what was that west virginia or was is that just plain old yeah that's west

virginia i see yeah yeah um they fucking suck and new mexico was is the most depressing place i've ever been where were you in new mexico it all looks the same i don't know the brown part i imagine new mexico and arizona just both look kind of orangish dirt no not dirty but like the you know you know what i mean new mexico has none of the pretty red rock formations that Arizona has. Like we went to Sedona and that part of Arizona was so beautiful. I'm definitely going to go back at some point. Like the canyons and stuff, the rock formations, stuff that I don't even know the names for. But New Mexico, I remember poverty, bad food and the color brown. Dark brown.

That sounds depressing. It was was awful it was so i thought it might be kind of pretty because of like breaking bad and like albuquerque and like you saw some neat stuff but i guess not yeah none of their yards really had grass that's kind of depressing yeah the yards in the show have yards in new mexico oh in breaking bad they've all got the pebbles yeah yeah i i flew into Albuquerque a couple years ago when I went to Colorado for a few weeks

when I was like between probations. And I remember that. I remember thinking like, yeah, there you go. Yeah, I mean, the mountains look awesome. Yeah, the mountains look great. And it's so goddamn dry there that i can i

can feel my eyes drying out looking at this picture i can feel my nose starting to bleed after four hours there yeah mine always bleeds in vegas if i'm anywhere out there yeah a little little psa virgil's zero sugar root beer is horrible. This is bar none. The worst cream soda I've ever had in my life. It is sweetened with monk fruit. Oh, no monk fruit needs to leave the sweetener game because Stevie is here.

So all everything is better than coyotes of the sweet. Yeah. They are the Arizona coyotes of the sweater day. This is the Arizona coyotes. It's just... It doesn't even taste like cream soda. I wish you spat it out. I wish you... All over my keyboard. Destroy another one.

This was hugely disappointing because this is expensive, nice root beer. I always expect a nice quality soda. Their regular diet root beer, Virgil's, very good. When people ask me what my favorite root beer is, I always just tell them Barks, B-A-R-Q-S because Barks is fine. But I only say that

because I don't think they'll be able to find Virgil's. I have to go to the DeKalb Farmer's Market or something, wherever that place is and uh i get the uh the big i think it's a liter it's a like a liter glass bottle it's got that cantilever top the thing that you like yeah those are awesome and uh it's like special bavarian nutmeg root beer and i'm like fuck yeah it is and i i remember the first bottle ever got like eight years ago we got that thing home and I was

my girlfriend was like you wanna we're gonna try the Bavarian nutmeg root beer now and I'm like well we gotta get we gotta chill it first she's like well let's just put it on ice and I'm like ah we will wait we will we will wait for this

and we did by the time your nose is done bleeding you'll be ready to drink yeah that'll be that's how you can keep up the time i just remember getting real good and stoned and drinking that amazing root beer but yeah that's my that's my favorite um i can't remember if i've ever had the the sugar free yeah don't don't go for the zero sugar and that like that's why i get virgil's sometimes is like a nice little treat because it's such an elite cream soda root beer company. But they miss the mark by a million miles with this. Nobody buy it.

Nobody try it. It is disgusting. I've been drinking a lot of Coke Zero for like weeks now. I think they messed with the formula or something, and it tastes really good to me. Obviously, it's not Coke. Someone had a Mexican Coke the other day coke um someone had a mexican coke the other day and i had a sip and i was like oh god that's good that's so much better than this foul substitute this is nothing like coke but if you drink enough of these you're like oh that's pretty

good yeah close that's okay i mean like zevia oh blows that virgil's Zero Sugar Root Beer out of the water. And Zevia is not bad, but it's also not, like, on the level of even, like, A&W bar style. Zevia's an acquired taste, though. Like, if you've never had a Zevia and you crack one open, you're probably not going to love it. Like, you need to get at least a couple. The first 12-pack of Zevia I got, I don't think I finished it. I had to, like, go back to that well and, like, try again a few weeks later and i was like i mean i guess well you keep you have to buy in like the the variety packs and i bought one of those ever and i realized like oh so the mountain dew the

grapefruit the dr pepper these are all disgusting and and terrible this this the lemon lime sprite uh that's okay on ice that's okay on ice it tastes weird sprite is probably the one soda like the one full sugar soda that i really enjoy like once in a while on like a hot day an ice cold sprite is just fucking awesome i like all sodas i haven't had a mountain dew in years because they taste like syrup but they're good they are those are good i've been drinking too many energy drinks recently i should actually cut back on that i got uh richard ryan's thing the uh the black rifle coffee they make little um oh shit here's one right here fucking yeah. These little energy drinks I've been getting at the gas station. Nice. Espresso mocha.

They're really fucking good. 300 milligrams of caffeine or something. 200 milligrams of caffeine. I don't know. I went to the gas station the other morning and I usually get a different thing that's kind of similar, but I saw that I grabbed. It's really good. 200 is a pretty good amount. Yeah.

Like as far as caffeine, 300, the bangs and the rains at 300. It's too much. Caffeine affects me differently. In small doses, it makes me sleepy. And a small dose for me, I guess, is around 200 milligrams. Because like the other night I was like, or the other evening, I was trying to decide if I wanted to take a nap or if I want to just push through it and like,

keep like doing what I was doing. We were playing games and I was like, I'm going to take a caffeine pill. I'll just, I'll get my sleep schedule. Right. I took 200 milligrams of caffeine, fell asleep 30 minutes later and,

and, and didn't wake up for nine hours. Jesus Christ. I fell asleep on the couch playing one of those videos that's just like thunderstorms and lightning and stuff. And rain. I love those.

I just woke up nine hours later so well rested with 200 milligrams of caffeine. I don't know. Maybe I need to take more for it to have any effect. Seems like you do. I've been smoking this THCO or whatever, but I'm getting at the gas station.

And it's really strong. How is it different than Delta 8? Just stronger? Yeah. Yeah, I guess it's just stronger. I don't know. It's really similar to like the the stuff i was smoking colorado i feel like it's i've been i've been looking around at like the delta 8 sites

recently because i've never like gone to those and like i didn't even realize that you could just have that shipped to you go to uh reefers bay uh that's i did i ordered some uh some gummies from them the other day and so we'll see if they're good midi turned me on to those people and uh the concentrate is like 50 cents a gram i think for concentrate so you can't really beat that it's i was shopping around on their site it is way cheaper like like like 100 cheaper 50 cheaper than like where i go around here like the in-person store so where i was going like here it was it was like 30 a gram oh fuck versus there where it's 50 cents a gram so yours is even worse like these like this like 625 milligram container of gummies at the place i go to is like $33.

And the equivalent of this on that site, a reefer Bay is like 18 bucks. Yeah. No, it's huge, huge discount. As long as I didn't order very much the first time. Cause I want to like make sure it's,

it's good. Like have you bought the gummy bears or the gummy pieces, whatever off there? I have not, not from that website. I think Middy has, and he says they're strong. I think he's had good experiences with everything, but he buys the bulk oil. He buys a big jar of oil, an ounce or two at a time.

That's so much. Yeah. He's like my taste tester. We'll be in there gaming, and Middy will come in. He's like, hey,. So we'll be in there gaming and Middy will come in and he's like, hey, what's going on guys? And I'm like, are you high? He's like, yeah!

He's got off work. Middy is, every day, Middy is blitzed. No, I'm talking about his job now. He's having to lay hands on another minority who's trying to take some fucking lobster up out of that store i don't know what i need to ask him

this like like midi i know you watch the show why why are you so good at your job because if i had your job i would stop just enough crab thieves that they would employ but not so many that they would promote me to the crab cop of like the scariest store in the state because that's what they've done middy he's the crab police he's a crab cop middy has has has saved so much crab from being stolen out of that store he works at he's lost prevention um that they have promoted him and they're like we need a man like you downtown and he's like wait what i'm just trying to make ends meet here no no no son you've got a future and as a crab cop you're going downtown to to mega city one now you're a crustacean detective midi midi sent me a video of what happened where he's going to be working

during the, I don't know, Freddie Gray thing or last time there was a police shooting. They burnt the place to the ground. And when I say place I mean the city. I don't mean the store. They like burnt the town down. Without getting too specific,

he's up in the northern Midwest area. That's where they're sending him now because he's up in the in the northern midwest area and that's where they're sending him now because he's been so goddamn effective as a crab cop i saw this i saw this video because he's got access to all the security stuff because he's a security guy but like this lady is clearly stealing like bags of crap she just bagged it up and she's walking out and he's like lumbering after her. He's like, you know, like six, four, six, five, like 260. Like after he fell on and and all of a sudden a car like pulls in front of her. She's running. He's chasing in a car, cuts her off.

And I thought I was like, oh, shit, that's her partner. Now, I mean, he's going to have to deal with something other than a 100-pound girl. No, that's crab cop number two. He gets out. He's like, I saw you chasing her, boss. Minnie's like, give me the crab, lady. Give me the crab. No one gets hurt.

He says, I told her, I've got 150 pounds on you lady she says what does that mean he's like it means i'm getting the crab dude what a piece of shit to steal crab but he's like really diligent about his job. I think he must like it. He must like confronting people with their thefts because someone was like – I mean it must be fun to confront people when you're 6'5 and the highest level of criminal is like a crab person. Well, he caught like a couple the other day, a guy and a girl, and the guy had been stealing sunglasses I think, like dollar store sunglasses,

like not even like some sort of designer shit. Like an $8 pair of sunglasses or something. And Middy was like, hey, hey, hey, your pockets. Take it out of your pocket. Put it back. And he was like, shit. Fine, fine. Took it out. Put it back. And his girlfriend was like, shit.

Y'all really stopping people for shit like that? And he goes, are y'all really stealing shit like that? Fuck you, honky! And they left. Are you really stopping people for stealing? Yes! Yeah, it's

normal when someone steals, you go please pay for the goods which you're trying to confiscate. Are you really stopping us for such a petty theft? And it's like, are you really committing such petty thefts like don't you get what you're saying yeah so it's been interesting he's always got you know footage of him tussling with people the one guy who like bucked on him and was like like like did one of those and he's like it's a real david and goliath type scenario it's it's like clearly you do not want to fight Mitty.

I don't think Mitty's a kung fu fighter or anything, but at some point, he's just going to squeeze you real hard. He's a big guy. Yeah. The bigger person is more likely to win, generally. This guy was a little guy by any standard. Especially when they're not weighed down with pounds of crab. That little fellow's agility, isn't he? His agility score is down because he's over encumbered

he's he's crawling to his car covered in crab because he's over encumbered and then midi has to come and beat the shit out of a little head kick action yeah what was the other thing they steal oh the air dusters he's also got the problem where people come in it's a big store i i think you should picture like a sam's's Club where they just have everything. And I guess that they come in, they steal the air dusters. They huff them. Those keyboard cleaner things. And so they've got like – I think they had a guy living in one of the stores.

Not his store, but one of the other part of the chain. Subsisting on computer duster? No, he was living up in the attic of the store, up in the ceiling, and then he'd come down during the night and huff himself high as fuck on air duster. Okay, I like that guy. They only found out because they walked

in, I think, one day, and he was just passed out in the aisle. With cans of computer duster. There's just empty, empty dusters all around him. And they're just like, they thought someone had broken in, but then they're like, nothing's broken.

Wait a minute. There's a little Robinson Caruso rope ladder leading up to above electronics. This piece of shit's been living here. That's hilarious. Have you ever seen the video where that guy falls out of the ceiling of a Waffle House on to well we've all been to a waffle house before imagine you're in a waffle house all right the clinking of plates the the the foul-mouthed ruffians who

attend a waffle house with you there um and then somebody just falls out of the goddamn ceiling i've never seen that video they just fall on the goddamn ceiling. I've never seen that video. They just fall out of the goddamn ceiling on the floor. And, you know, it's the whole Waffle House ceiling falls apart, too, right? Like the tiling and the insulation. There's wires and cables like everything in a Waffle House ceiling falls on the floor, including a man who'd been living in the ceiling of a fucking Waffle House. A horrible establishment to be living in. How does he even get up there?

They're open 24 hours a day. I'd rather live in an IHOP. Really? Yeah, I think IHOP's better than Waffle House. You know where I'd want to go? Where? I'd want to live in an Olive Garden because when you're there, you're family.

Yeah, and then when you barge down drunk or whatever, demanding unlimited breadsticks. I would be lowering myself down upside down to grab one of those enormously oversized bottles of wine. You could go down there and get a two liter bottle of wine.

Sorry everyone, I'm trying to get fucked up. Lugging that up with you. That's great. We've talked about it before. I won't go into it again. That is a really creepy thing, the idea of someone living in your attic. And look, if

100,000 people end up watching this or hearing this or knowing about this, the fucking odds are that one of you has someone living in your attic. And the odds of that group of people, one of them is a murderer. So, you know know there's six people out there

but someone living in their ceiling one of them is dealing with a homicidal maniac I don't want to check my attic because if I don't check it's not there I think that at least one of the people listening is in someone's attic right now he's sitting up above an olive garden

with a magnum of wine. Trash. Goddamn Kyle knows me well. We are fucking... I gotta go. I'm gonna go live in Kyle's attic. Right after I finish this 128 ounces of Merlot that's been sitting on the display shelf

at Olive garden since 2003 there's a bunch of sediment in the bottom but i don't mind i bet there would be i always saw i doubt they fill those giant bottle i know exactly we're talking about those like bottles of wine the size of someone's like a child's torso like there's no way that they're putting the good wine in that that's just like filler that it's like a fucking water with food coloring in it i bet it's got to be gross stuff i know um i was cleaning out my cupboard the other day and i found a bottle of uh i found a bottle of red wine that i was using for cooking and when i like tilted the bottle so that i could see the bottom it had stained the bottom of the

bottle so it's been forever it you know a year and a half two years sitting there probably probably something like that probably three years it may be from like the last house even because it was like a liter bottle of wine it had stained the bottle that can't be good no i'm not drinking that i poured that out we've had like on our drink cart like there have been times where like there's been a wine that was like half open for many months sitting down there on the bottom. And it's like, oh, I'll have a glass of wine tonight or my wife will. And it's like you open it and it's like, can wine go rotten?

And it's like, well, a $12 wine from the grocery store probably can. Just pour this out. I don't know if that's even true, but it seems like it could be. Did I tell you about when I accidentally signed up for that wine club? No, I know you, you're such a wino. You love the notes and the fruits.

No, I'm a cheapskate though. And whenever I see an opportunity to like, like, like squeeze a dollar out of like some promotional program, I tell myself I'll remember to unsubscribe, but I'm going to get these savings. Yeah.

And I don't remember how it started. It was like started it was like it was a chain event that got me going but i think i'm initially like what was it i think i was buying a set of i think i was on like a sex toy website and they were like if you spend eight dollars you get a gift card to a wine website for twenty20. I was like, that's pretty good, $12 free. I was like, this is just free money. I found something that cost exactly $8, some cheap piece of handcuffs

with fur on them or something that I've never used because they're garbage. Sure enough, I go to this wine website and they give me $20, but they're also like, hey, take the $20 if you they're also like, Hey, take the 20 if you want it, but maybe you'd like to be a premium wino piece of shit.

Who's in our silver club member medallion customer. Yeah. And I was like, God, that's so much savings. I can't go wrong. You don't even like wine. I hate wine. I don't drink it. And and but it was like the more wine i bought the more free wine they give me and a certain there was this point

where it was like if i spend just 90 dollars i will get so much wine that I'll just never need anymore. Lifetime supply. I don't know what I got wrangled into, Taylor, but I'll say this. I was subscribed for several months before I realized what had happened, and I have never had a sip of that wine, and Kitty will never go thirsty again. All of those things are for sure. At least she won that whole endeavor. She got a bunch of free wine out of it i was like one day i texted her i was like hey you like wine right and she's like no not really would you like a whole bunch of it because i'm like i'm allowed

to keep it at my home and she's like well sure and i like showed up with like oh no i had it shipped to her do you like wine no not really well well she said that and like literally there were 19 bottles of wine in route it was so absurdly cheap like like every time you added like eight more bottles it was like every time you paid for one they'd like give you eight more for free or something. And I was just like, just in glass, I'm making money. You can load up the back of a postal cart and drive to Michigan. I must have been drunk when I did it. I don't know how. I love wine.

One time you've been wine drunk in the last decade. It literally took a long time. It literally took like a couple months before I realized that I was subscribed to some sort of wine club. You kept getting wine to your door, right? No. No. I don't even know how the wine club worked. It seemed like it just kept taking money from me and holding on to it.

You're just a member for fun? Not even like a cookie club where they send you cookies it was like every it was like every 40 i gave them they gave me like a like 160 worth of wine or something and but that was accruing every month so when i finally like discovered my mistake i had like two or three months of like accrued wine and not just 120 worth of wine like i paid for like of like a crude wine and not just $120 worth of wine. Like I paid for like $780 worth of wine or whatever the math comes to. Like I ended up with so much fucking wine Taylor and I've never had a sip. It's not even like,

I mean, I'm sure there are people out there listening. I'm also subscribed to showtime. Very similar. That's an even bigger waste of money. There's nothing on showtime showtime sucks i think dexter was on there i quit watching dex the new the dexter revival after like two episodes that's terrible ah i just it's it felt like the same old same to me

and he's still good but everything else felt bad um i didn't like any of the other stuff and i'm gonna guess that in the end because it's already been i've only seen two episodes but i immediately knew like like like who the bad guy was like they did such a bad you know that thing where they'll like zoom in on like the the bad guy's face you'll see his eyes yeah but if like the character has like incredibly distinctive eyes how about this you know so what if what if they zoomed in on the character's mouth and it was steve buscemi's mouth yeah but then but then they tried to like keep it a secret who the bad guy was and steve buscemi's in the next scene i'll snaggle to oh those are the teeth that's the teeth the bad guy's teeth yeah it would be like if they were trying to keep who batman was a secret from the audience you're like are we supposed to not know or like i don't

understand who's this bat enthusiast bruce wayne yeah it doesn't make any sense so like right away you're like um i'm pretty sure that guy with the green eyes and the caterpillar eyebrows is the bad guy because they keep zooming in on them while he's like holding the girl hostage. And then there he is as a main fucking character. Yep. Plus like, I know that actor, like I know what he looks like,

like that failed immediately. And then I think that, uh, in the end, cause his son like shows back up that his son's going to turn out to be a serial killer and probably maybe kill Dexter. Yeah. I'm not watching that.

I'm not watching the original series. Didn't suck me in to give the second one a chance. i've rewatched it it's the original series i remember it starting off so well and yeah like sucking me in so much and then a few see it was like a few seasons in that i was like you know i'm not even enjoying this like i'm not ending an episode and going like oh what's gonna happen i'm ending an episode and being like how's the whole story gonna end how's this gonna wrap up like i have to just get through to the end the way game of thrones was final season where you're just chugging you know dragging through it trying to see what the end is no i agree with you 100 it was it got so repetitive and formulaic by the end i really didn't care for it but the first two maybe

three seasons were excellent of dexter um i did i don't like this revival thing i'm done with it it was like that shit uh the blacklist that show oh it started it started out really neat with uh slater slater but what's the actor's name oh um slater is that right you're thinking of christian slater um but but that's not who it is it's um it's um god it's spader kevin's uh it's it's spader james spader james spader that's his name well i like him a lot but that that show like fell victim to the same thing like i remember years ago chiz was telling me you gotta watch the blacklist and i started watching the blacklist

and it was like the first season i was like this is really interesting this is really neat and then after that it was just every single scenario james spader's the smartest guy in the room nothing is ever truly a threat because even when something happens that he couldn't have possibly predicted because it went against his previously espoused plan it'd be like and how do you feel about that james spader and he's like tied up like fucking you know gun to his head and he's like you've fallen into my trap and it's like this shit is so fucking gay i don't care anymore yeah that that really is exactly how it would go like but i honestly i let you pull four of my teeth out to show how how much i'm i have your teeth james why would you allow me to do that those are my baby teeth i'm like a shark i'm always regrowing the teeth

i like that part of it um i i how badass he is. How like he's just unflappably badass. I really enjoy that part of it. I like characters that are like that, but I do kind of know going in that it's going to be something kind of silly like that. I like this though. I stopped watching I think because

of the pandemic. I think they did like an animated thing and I heard that that had happened. Like I think they just couldn't do an episode like couldn't film it so they animated it oh that's terrible i heard that and that kind of i was like oh i'll probably like skip this whole season then and like oh the trailer park boy strategy let's see how that pans out well i don't know like maybe they did a good job i do like james spader a ton have you ever seen the secretary i think so yeah it's like the one where he's got the BDSM relationship with his secretary. Oh, no, I have not seen that.

Oh, that's really good. That's really good. So many girls have told me that that was how they got into BDSM and being spanked or whatever. It's The Secretary. or whatever um it's uh it's it's the secretary it's uh james spader is the the boss and his secretary is um jake gyllenhaal's sister uh maggie gyllenhaal i think and um and she's really hot in it which is a struggle for her but she does her best though just like her brother she's very talented actress and she and she gets it done somehow no she has a weird face she has that kirsten dunst face where like

she's got a there's a few angles that it's like oh shit oh it's you hey remember jerry had the girlfriend who was only pretty in certain light yeah she had like almost a mustache in the dark light with like the all the bags under her eyes. He would always take her to the same booth at Monk's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They'd have to switch places. It'd be a totally different person. Well, you want to call it a PKN?

Yeah, I think so. I haven't eaten since breakfast. I slept the day away. I'm going to go eat some dinner as well and pour out this rancid fucking zero sugar root beer. Probably a good idea. All right. PKN 388.