Painkiller Already - PKN 406

Episode Date: June 1, 2022

pkn episode 406 over a thousand in i've been watching this shooting i am absolutely loving all the like coward of the county memes that i'm seeing on reddit i if you guys don't know apparently the police they have a SWAT team in this tiny little town i guess it's normal for the police to be about 40% of a town's budget, but they're really rubbing that number in. I don't know what a town's budget is normally consist of. Is it usually all potholes? I'm not sure.

A park. A park. Yeah, yeah. But I guess 40% of the town's budget is this police department, and they suck. I think it's normal to pay 40% and still get police that suck. I think that's typical. But it's not normal for them to suck like this. Maybe it is. They sat outside the room

for 45 minutes. They heard intermittent gunshots go off and their children calling 911 from the room their claim was they didn't realize the shooter was shooting people now i don't know maybe when you shoot people they make noises i would think that like children cry stuff like that um but the police are like you have to understand if we had gone through that door maybe we could have got shot it's like, you're the fucking SWAT team. Why are you leaving nine-year-old elementary school students to sort it out for you? That's why you got that giant shield.

Right? And the special boots and the gauntlets. That's why you're all decked out. Like, all jokes aside, I feel like those guys are completely complicit in this shooting and they should be tried for murder. All those cops, any of those cops who stood by, that cop that tased the parent who was trying to save his child, all those cops need to be put on trial and just absolutely hit with the hardest punishments imaginable. They assisted the shooter.

They worked as a team together, and it's more than accessory. They worked as a team with the shooter, in my opinion. They kind of did. I hadn't looked at it through that lens. They were great teammates. He couldn't have asked. If he had brought in one of those crack teams from the movies

that Joker hires, he couldn't have gotten better results. They're completely complicit in this. They were his accessories. He couldn't have done it without them. Those would be his words if he were still alive. Couldn't have done it without you. Yeah, without his bouncers keeping people out.

I have a little pet peeve that bothers me. It's Texas. This police department apparently wears cowboy hats. Cowboy hats are for tough dudes not big muscular dudes necessarily but fucking men right mask it like brave men who don't complain about cuts or even sprained ankles right cowboy hats are for bad take off your fucking hat copper that's a man's hat well why are you playing as a man when when you're when you're clearly a pussy right you are a bunch of femboys who let elementary school children face death in the eye while you sat outside scared like little kittens

take your fucking hat off i yeah this picture that fucking cowards every one of them this is what pussies look like but in all their press conferences they have these fucking cowboy hats on i'm not accustomed to seeing cowboy even in north carolina cowboy hats are not very common no it's a western thing but if i do see a cowboy hat that guy probably works in the sun and he's you know he does like man shit like nah i'm not anymore they're virtue signaling at this point like it's no different uh wearing that cowboy hat is just like wearing a pussy hat or something like that um they're just letting you know what team they're on most of the time there's a few guys who are wearing cowboy hats it's like well it's the most

practical headwear for what i do but like those guys are far in between that's what i think that's what i often see in my area. You know, like this guy looks like he attaches and implements detractors all the time. You know, he's wearing a cowboy hat. Not everybody's wearing it as a practical piece of headwear. They are letting you know which team they're on. You know, they're letting you know. They're cosplaying as something as well.

Just like that SWAT team there they're all cosplayers uh if it had been like some one of those calls where it's like a wellness check and it was one of those crazy grandmas who can't figure out how to put a knife down they'd have been foaming at the mouth to be first through the door put it down they look let me put my hat on there's no way's going to put it down because she can't understand things. Put it down! And then they shoot her down. That's their bag. Has there been any explanation at all?

Has there been anything like, the sheriff said, stand down, because any explanation on their end, we thought we might get shot. There'll be a big'll uh there'll be a big investigation and there'll be a timeline if you said what i know the answer their explanation has been twofold one if we had gone in there we could have been shot and it's terrible they're

like people need to understand if we had gone in there we could be shot that's hard to hear when there's children getting shot yeah their other thing is and this is the bigger one they say they didn't realize there were kids in there they didn't think they had an active when there's children getting shot. Their other thing is, and this is the bigger one, they say they didn't realize there were kids in there. They didn't think they had an active shooter. They thought they had what they're calling a barricaded shooter. A shooter who's trapped in this room and they can take their time

negotiating, talking, doing whatever it takes. There's no clock on a barricaded shooter, a shooter who's trapped in a room. It is nonsense because there were at least two 911 calls from children saying that they needed help. And they heard intermittent gunshots. That's that cover your ass police shit.

They went through and they were like, hey, what scenario would it have been okay for us not to go in? Well, if there was a barricaded shooter, that's when we stay out. All right, well, let's tell them that's what we thought it was. That's exactly what's happening.

They opened up the old playbook and they were like when are we allowed to stay outside like cowards i i don't know how many children were shot in that room i know 19 people died overall i'm gonna make up numbers just woody pull the numbers out of his butt 12 died in that room 15 something like that like most of them so did they all die silently did these kids get shot and stoically cover their heart and i don't know uh well i mean it's it it began with like two cops seeing the guy and running away right like like it is one of the biggest failures of law enforcement um that i've ever even heard of. They are literally, I really, really hope that these people go to prison for dozens and dozens of years for what they did, for this kind of cowardice. If it were the military, they'd have been shot by now.

There'd be a tribunal or something, and they would be shot if they were in the military, and that would be the proper thing as well. This kind of cowardice has no like i i i want to say someone showed like the oath that you take for that job or something and there's a there's a part that like literally covers this it's like if you're not ready to like put your life and you know before a person someone else's life like this is not the job for you some nonsense like that just the whole thing is so awful all those dead children and then these like fake tough guys that are cut from the same ilk that we've seen time and time again take your hat off these piece of shit fake ass cops like that cosplay like they're gi joe like it's real pathetic and it's hard to even look at i saw that bit you were talking about of like a woman or a man someone

was trying to get into the school and was tackled and tased by police officers to prevent him from going in and trying to save his child like if you were to see that in a movie you would go that's an unbelievable level of evil like i this is disrupting the narrative it's an unbelievable level of evil. Like, this is disrupting the narrative. It's so unbelievable. Like, that is insane. Because at that point, like, why would they keep them from running in there? I've been seeing tactic, what they teach people to do. Like, regular cops not associated with this incident are like, I can't believe what they did.

Everybody knows what you do. You go in and you get the shooter. He's like, they do drills. He's like, we're on a swap team. Every swap team does these drills. There are children on the floor bleeding out. You step over them and get to the shooter. That's the move. You don't care for this kid because that's one kid. The shooter can make many more of these. The top priority is the number one is to get it. Yeah, I see Zach. So anyway,

these guys, cowards. Cowards. They're a well-funded SWAT team. It's real despicable. I want awful things for those people. I want them to die. They're just terrible. I have been trying to stay away from it because it upsets me so, so much. I don't know know there's something so much worse about people standing idly by and

even worse just literally being accessories the guys who like the guys who held back um the the parents trying to save the children so that the killer could kill them it's insane it's insanity it's it's insanity it's twiddling your mustache villainous shit it is it is evil evil evil and like there's there's gonna be no explanation for in the end other than cowardice it's it's all it's gonna be it was it was a bunch of big fake uh tough men who were afraid to go do their job and it was a kid it was a little kid they were they're dealing with anyway like this shooter is like 18 years old five foot nothing like. He is not some fucking Rambo. Don't picture Schwarzenegger at the end of Commando

suiting up. Little dude walked in with a gun and everybody ran away and refused to do their jobs. Oh, I'm sorry. Yes, that's all true. Now, as per usual in America, the gun debate comes around.

Whether or not we should ban guns. And I, the filthy made an impact on my thinking like, Hey, every little barrier you put in place makes things a little bit harder. I liken it to a suicide, right? When you stop someone from jumping off a bridge,

typically that person doesn't go back and jump off the bridge tomorrow. That that's what the stats are. Overwhelmingly, they say, thank God you did that for me. I was at a low. That low was temporary. And I didn't realize how I had better days coming. That's what happens when you prevent a suicide. Cool.

I feel like preventing a mass shooting might be a similar thing. And the people arguing against it, not saying they're right or wrong, but laid out the arguments, will say nothing could have stopped these guys. If someone who's motivated to do this is going to do it anyway, they're going to find a way. If you make all these guns illegal, they'll buy the guns illegally. If you do this, they'll do that. There are already laws preventing murder. So how does more laws hurt?

Okay, I get it. But that's a bit of a nirvana fallacy. Like, you know what? If it doesn't stop 100% of the time, if it just makes things a little bit better, it's not worth doing. That's, you know, if it's all possible for someone to get around this new system we put in place, then the new system sucks and, you know, don't bother putting it in place. In reality, if we just lower these, if you make us us they made automatic rifles uh automatic machine guns illegal there still exists a little bit but it's pretty hard to get one if they did that to

assault rifles forgive me i used the term but yeah you know whatever ar-15s ak-47s we all know scars acrs the assault rifles if they did that to those then um you know maybe there'd be a few of them out there over time 25 years from now they'd be turned in someone would inherit that gun who's not really into it and maybe do a buyback program i don't know they would eventually start to get wiped out um a buyback program wouldn't prevent anyone who was going to use it maliciously. A buyback program would make them scarce, right? So there's a lot of people who have them who maybe aren't really into them. Maybe I'm your kid.

You're really into it, but you pass. You send it to me and I just dump it on the buyback program because what? I'm going to have this gun around my house. Now I have to care for it. Well, the buyback program only works? I'm going to have this gun around my house. The buyback program only works if it goes alongside with a ban. Now you're going to have to figure out how to ban a lot of different kinds of

weapons, right? Without the ban, then there's new ones hit the street. Buyback programs don't do much. I agree with you. Let's see. Of suicides, 7% of attempters eventually died.

No, that's not true. It's 100% of eventually died. Whoever's writing those stats. You said it jumped out at me more than the gun thing. I was like, how would you do a long-term follow-up on people like that? If you couldn't reach them, you just remove them from the study as a non-response?

Or do you go, well, likely that data would come in in a way that reflected badly that they probably killed themselves. How would they do that? You know what I mean? It's irrelevant. Check obits. It's irrelevant. I don't think you're going to be able to legislate against this necessarily. You're not going to stop it.

And when you go case by case and you see everyone paints them all the same, but they're also different. That guy in Buffalo was clear of thought and secure of his purpose. He knew what he was doing. He had some crazy ideas that he was basing what he was doing on, but he was on a mission to kill black people because he literally thought that he was right in the middle of a race war, essentially. He thought the race war was already going on. It just wasn't evident to everyone else. And he was going to start fighting in it. Then we've got this guy who seems like he was a low IQ individual, I'll call him. This is the Texas dude. This Texas guy

is an 18 year old who just turned 18. And the text message that he's having, he's like, this all happened because his grandma was taking his cell phone away. I didn't hear that. That's what happened he's like, this all happened because his grandma was taking his cell phone away. I didn't hear that. That's what happened? They'll break this thing down and they'll be like, ah, he actually had this grand conspiracy. No, he was having an argument over his fucking phone, and this was a loser.

And you take a loser's phone away, and it's like, what do I have to live for? She took the phone away, he shot her in the head and he goes i just shot my grandma in the head i think i'll go shoot up an elementary school like that's it that's how much planning and forethought went into this i doubt he had maps of elementary schools gone drawn um i think that like what you're seeing from the right a lot right now obviously they're not going to say i thought he did the manifesto thing or am I thinking of a different last

guy? That's New York. The guy who was like, like had his race war thought, but this guy, like I think Ted Cruz is talking a lot about the door, right? The unlocked door to the school.

Cause that's look, look, you're looking for why this thing went wrong. And it's easy to be like, because there are guns there. Okay. Yeah, that's absolutely right.

Also because there's people there. Also because people are allowed to move freely in this country. We have that right too. He was able to get to the school. I don't know why. I like the door thing. Do you? Yeah, because I know the door thing's been a thing for a while

because I've got some family members who teach. The school's a locked down area. It's supposed to be shut. It's not come on in everybody anymore like it was when I was a child child. The door was supposed to be closed. He was able to walk right in. There should have been,

like everybody keeps saying, what could have stopped this? A guy with a gun could have. And you're like, oh, don't tell me that. I hate hearing that. Okay, well, what do you want to do? Well, here here's the thing i'm pretty sure the school had an armed guard and there were what 25 guys with guns dressed in cowboy hats and police uniforms

here's another thing and we try everything it's the death penalty if you if you run like that is honestly look the failing here the failing here that the thing that's different about this case in my opinion about this one in particular and it's a little microcosm that it is is that all the cops joined in and helped they did everything but shoot kids um that's the thing that's different about this to me that the cops helped this time so i think the focus on this one in particular if we're going to legislate anything maybe we figure out how we punish cops for dereliction of duty maybe this is when we figure out when a cop does something like this we do that in general i want to expand

this right like if a cop plans evidence if a cop shoots someone who's already handcuffed let's start right here where we're at like i agree with you 100 but like when the cops run away and kids die okay that's second degree murder we'll call it that one you get 35 to life sir wait but i'm a good old boy didn't you see the hat 45 to life get out of here like like i really want some street justice here where there's one of the where's that texas judge who would do this in the street for us i was like these texas uh guys just so you know texas this is your worst look ever when we saw your grid go down and we didn't laugh too hard because snow makes my state shut down but this is this is the most humiliating thing that's happened in texas since the alamo

texans take your fucking hats off take your hat off take your hat off you pussies take your hat off you pussy the alamo remembering a loss imagine uh is this what happened to the alamo the truth they all ran. We saw them Mexicans piling over the wall, and we thought maybe they was having a little festival with our guys. We heard the shooting, but they celebrate with rifles a lot.

These guys are such cowards. I hate them so much. I hate them so much. I hate seeing those dead children too that's that's the worst part those they do that thing where they they blow up the picture of the little kids and so now they're almost like life size again and then they make like a big row of them and it's just like oh it's so hard to look at all those cute little fucking kids and they're like what were they like seven and eight and shit i think like

yeah yeah very young it's so gross it's so gross oh if i were one of those parents i would have a hard time not doing some things at this point about those police officers i i don't understand like like why there's i hope that that this doesn't die down and that somebody pays. Do you think they'll just pin it on some chief or something? What's remarkable about this story to me is that I haven't heard new news since day two. Day two, it was, hey, these cops kind of held everyone back and assisted the murder. Without new news, there's no legs yeah the story has no legs we're going to talk about something different soon oh and by the way half

the country it half the country believes you know uh it sucks that this happened but don't take my guns i didn't do it which is fair right i kind of fall into at least half most of the country believes that i think yeah i would say the majority believes that of this one anyway can a different story yeah yeah i guess so well more than half then perhaps it was somewhere near half i think we can agree uh it feels that hey don't fuck with my guns i didn't do anything why are you punishing innocent people that more than half perhaps wants a new story anyway. They're more than happy to just say next. Well, I mean, they've already seen that they need their guns because the police will not be the ones to swoop in and save their children. I saw a video by Cracked about a guy that prevented a knife, a serial knife murderer who was on a knife murdering spree.

Have you ever seen this video? I have not. I wish I could show it to you. But anyway anyway the guy narrates it it's all animated and it's pretty good it's well done and unbeknownst to him there is a serial knife murderer the guy's killed a lot of people it's in the double digits with a knife thus far he goes on the train this is our guy us we go on the train and crazy knife guy goes on he kind of identifies him as a little weird when he

steps on like the guy's just not in his right mind and he starts banging on the door to get into the engineer and he tells the engineer that he wants to kill him the engineer decides he doesn't like this offer keeps his door closed two policemen come now they're behind a door with a window you can picture a subway door with a window we've all seen them you can usually see a long way and uh the guy's banging on the door so then he takes us puts the knife up against our throat and says if you don't let me in i'm gonna kill this guy and he's like fuck this is a rough way to start my morning. And that goes on for a little bit. He decides to fight the guy.

He's like, I decide that I'm going to be a badass who takes down this serial knife-murdering crazy person. He's like, the problem is I don't have any training in being a badass person. So I just do my best. I watch a lot of UFC. I go for a single-leg takedown. And the video gets hilarious. He's like, it's supposed to look like this. It doesn't.

He, like, grabbed him. He didn't go for his legs. He went, like, over his waist. Notice how he counters with an uppercut stab. He's countering with downward stabs. He's cutting, like, the guy's lat. He's cutting the guy's arm. He's getting all these cuts on us.

he's cutting the guy's arm he's getting all these cuts on us and um to keep the story rolling along he eventually gets the tackle he gets stabbed a bunch of times like on the head and on the face he bangs the knife hand against the ground causing him to drop the knife i didn't think that worked apparently it worked for him and he gets the knife wielder to drop the knife. He subdues the knife wielder with bleeding out. He holds the knife wielder down. Then New York City's finest decides to open the door and they handcuff the disarmed

dude, leaving us to bleed out and die on the subway. A hero named Napkin Man comes along and applies pressure to our wounds so that we survive long enough for medical care to help and then he sues the city and says these cops didn't do anything they watched as i subdue this guy by the way the cops were on tv as heroes that stopped the knife murdering spree they didn't mention us at. They didn't mention the video teller in the slightest.

The cops are the people who stopped this and saved the city. And the case gets thrown out of court. So then he goes back to court and represents himself because he's out of money. He's just a person. And sues the city again by himself. And they, I got distracted.

He loses that too, but at least the judge describes why and he's like you had no prior contact with the police no relationship established that they were going to protect you and therefore they had no duty to stop the knife wielding dude from killing you case dismissed and it's an eye-opener that like, yeah, again and again, the police aren't really there to protect you like you think. It's like not even standard procedure to step in and save people who are being knifed or beaten

up or whatever. Not even close. That's the propaganda that we've been fed by television for the last 35 years. Protect and serve is like the ice cream of the future for Dippin' Dots. It's just advertising. They're not obligated to protect or serve you. I mean, it's a goal. We all have goals, guys.

It doesn't seem like a lot of them are taking it seriously. We would like to be able to protect and serve you, but hey, one day at a time, am I right? Pow! Pow! So, anyway, the video is great.

I hope you, I hope the listeners find it too, but yeah, the cops don't protect you like you'd think they do. Yeah, no, it's, it's probably not like that would be, honestly,

that's kind of my standpoint, I guess at this point, it's like, do we really want to take the guns away now that we are really sure the cops are not there to help us? Like the guys with the guns are not on our side. No, they're going to come posted something here that I want to read out loud. Neither the Constitution nor state law impose a general duty upon police officers and other governmental officials to protect individual persons from harm, even when they know harm will occur. Police can watch someone attack you, refuse to intervene and not violate the constitution. Police can watch someone attack you,

refuse to intervene and not violate the constitution. Well, the constitution. Yeah. They're not violating the Magna carta either i know i i okay sure sure sure i i hate that it said not violate the constitution but yeah like it's not their job i know a cop and he's like yep the more experienced you get the slower you respond to bar fights it all sort itself out before you get there it's like what like what about the maybe one of those guys in the fight really wishes he wasn't in the fight. Maybe he doesn't deserve to be there.

Maybe he didn't do anything wrong. Maybe it's not really a fight. Maybe it's a massacre that's been misreported. Somebody was like, hey, there's a fight going on in there. No, there's one guy with a hammer. St. Louis-laced. Yeah, there's a fight. It's Woody and the Mountain in a fight,

and Woody wishes he wasn't fighting. Please help him. The mountain has a fistful of knives and he's just using all of them. It's fucking rough, man. You've started on that Shorzy show, huh? I did. I got through the first two episodes and I think

it's genuinely funnier than Letterkenny. I think it's genuinely funnier than letter kenny i think it's a better show it has and it's silly to say because i love shows like seinfeld that are so directionless and everything but seinfeld has enough charm to get away with that like shorezy at least unlike letter kenny has like a direction to it like yeah trying to keep the hockey team from folding in the Northern Ontario fucking senior hockey league. Yep. And the no show. Yeah.

And their hockey organization. And it's very funny. I like the it's almost like Letterkenny. He like got a bunch of funny ideas about a character and he used all that to make a funnier character that has a bunch of little funny idiosyncrasies where he'll be incredibly cruel and mean to someone and then someone will say something very tame to him and he'll be like really we're gonna go there because if so i'm gonna need to cry now so i don't do it later and embarrass myself and he's like you know like are you about to cry he's like yeah and guess what i'd probably be crying a little bit more if i didn't get some out earlier i like that he's full waterworks crying every time the national anthem plays

he's just sobbing as the canadian national anthem like the the time like during the show and i won't ruin any more jokes but i like i genuinely laughed out loud pretty hard is like he got he had to grab like a bunch of you know d-list hockey x prospects to try and bolster the lineup of the team so they can win some games and keep the team from leaving and so they all fly in these four guys flying from toronto and then he picks them up in the jeep and they get back to his house and it's like an hour later and they're eating ice cream and he's like you guys uh none of you calls your parents it's been two hours since you got off a plane and they're like like talking in french or whatever like in their difficult newfie language and he's like talking on the phone somebody's like yeah i mean these guys must be fucking big

shots riding planes all the time because they've been in for two hours and haven't called their mom just he goes on about that for a while even later on it's like did you call your mom by the way yeah they're like fuck i i didn't think i because i didn't have that great of a taste on mouth from letter candy but i think this is a funnier show i like it i i think that it's better that it's um you really stick with like the main guy there instead of bouncing around to multiple groups uh like letter kenny is a bit like a sketch show in some ways because you kind of as you bounce around like maybe it tells a bigger narrative but i don't know there's a lot of. This is kind of just Shorzy. And I don't know if you've gotten deeper into it and you got to see his siblings.

No. That's a shit show. Where you see like his brother and sisters. Oh, that's great. Shorzy's brother and sisters are fucking... Is he going to Eddie Murphy it and be all of them? No, it's kind of a weird wackadoo situation where they're adopted, so they're all very different people.

And you get to see his dad, his adopted dad, gives this slide thing of his childhood, so you see why he is ruined, why he is this way. No, I like the whole thing. I like them talking about the ice cream cones so much. They call them sticks yeah like drumsticks like they keep they kept calling them stick who wants the game stick and i thought it was a hockey thing like somebody got a game stick and he's like how many game

sticks you got he's like 18 i got the costco pack and i was like oh i bet in canada you go to costco and buy an 18 pack of hockey sticks like if you you've got a team, you know, I bet I could totally see that being a thing. And, but no, they mean the fucking drumsticks. And they're all like, they're deciding like, hey, shouldn't we all get an ice cream? We did win. No, the MVP gets the game stick. Well, could he have his game stick as we'll call it first? And then everyone could join in and have

an ice cream thereafter well i don't know about as long as we make a make it known that this is the mvp stick okay and he gets his first well all right then and then it cuts and everybody now has an ice cream it's just so like silly um it is i like the fighting i i like the fighting when they like showed all of the moves like because I don't know any of that shit like I don't know how many of those were like known dirty moves or just like assault in the

street because one they're like the sucker punch and I'm like wait I know that one he just hauls off and hits the guy randomly while they're on the ice knocks him out the nuts thing is real some shitty guys will do that sometimes when they get angry.

Just flick you? Are they trying to do it so that no one sees that as well? Is that important? They are, but sometimes they just get so mad they do it. Like Ovechkin has gotten so mad. I mean, it's Ovechkin,

so people don't stay mad at him, but he's probably ruined a couple guys' ability to have kids. He'll take the blade of his stick. He'll take the blade part and try and go over the nut nut area of like the gooch and like rap rap rap rap as hard as he can why don't people stay mad at ovechkin is he charismatic or just good because they'll be like just see ovechkin hit that guy in the nuts and it's like that's a shame did you also know he might pass gretzky's goal record and it's like oh neat no way. No way. Yeah. He's the only person ever that might have a chance.

He's at 780 career goals. Gretzky is at 894. And so he needs 114 goals to catch and tie Gretzky. And he's 36. And so that's, you know, but he also plays, you know, there's a whole hockey website about him called Russian Machine Never Break. And he never gets injured inexplicably. Like he just doesn't really break.

Do they test very well in that sport? No, no. That'd be one. I've never heard of any NHL guy. There's a lot of things you can take. There's a lot of things you can take that sort of support everything around your muscles, all the ligaments and tendons and stuff, the stuff that's holding you together,

your joints, all that stuff. There's a lot of steroids and stuff that you could take to just make that shit bulletproof. So when you hear about I would imagine when you hear about someone who's bulletproof like that, it's probably more likely something like that than a genetic aberration where they're just tough.

Yeah. Or he's just been lucky. There's just people who have good careers. It's so sad. I always hate to see the guys who were like, he was the best that we'd ever seen, but he was like this glass hammer who tore this or that and the other,

and he was never the same guy again. The guys who can't go on and put that... like bo jackson is a good example oh yeah he was the guy he's like injury he had all the jokes about him in the nfl game or in madden like 2000 maybe it was madden 2000 where bo jackson's stats were so good it was it was before madden came out i think there was just a it was a different football game that was like one of those 2d up and down the screen kind of deals, I think. And I think it was Bo Jackson's game maybe,

or something like that. But it was before Madden, I think, or at least before Madden looked like Madden, but yeah, Bo Jackson's ridiculous. The ESPN 30 for 30 on him. I can't remember what it's called.

It's, it's, it's, it's, it's his old slogan is really good. Oh's his old slogan. It's really good. Bo Nose? What's that? Bo Nose? Yeah, maybe something like that.

Maybe Bo Nose. Something similar to that. Some spin on his old thing. He was a multi-sport athlete, right? Yeah, he played baseball and football professionally at the same time. It's insane. His physique is the crazy thing. And like his physique is the crazy thing. Like when you look at like they my favorite part of the whole thing is the interviews with like high school coaches, college coaches and people who grew up with him who saw him do these like physical feats.

And he sounds a lot like one of those mythical characters like John Henry or who had the big blue ox, Paul Bunyan. Like he fits. He's like a tall tale. He's like a tall tale with some of the things that they, they say he did and little things, you know, that, that like seem like you wouldn't make them up. Like they talk about him jumping over the cars. They talk about him dunking.

I think he jumped over someone's head and then dunked a ball not a ball though they're like he had a stick because we didn't have a ball and it's like something about them saying that it was a stick made it seem so much more real because why would they say he had a stick if he didn't have a stick and he didn't do the whole thing and then him him jumping out of um thigh hot thigh deep water and doing a backflip flat-footed uh stuff like that like all that crazy shit um killing the pigs with rocks like like like he could throw a rock all that shit and then like his high school baseball coach is like yeah he hit one over that tree one day and hit one over that billboard and over those lights and just like these

ridiculous home runs he was hitting at 17 uh when the high school uh coach first joined there to like get that new job he was like he was like yeah yeah okay okay who's that big old bodybuilder y'all got doing landscaping over there and like that's bo jackson he's a junior here he's like oh yeah does he play ball yeah the bo jackson shit's great and then uh you know you get through like all the nike stuff and uh i don't know it's his injury is a wild weird injury he's literally just too powerful for like the body that he was put in into and just tore it apart it was his hip or something right yep he did this thing with his hip that interrupted the blood flow and the muscle like died

in this incredibly painful thing and then they like rebuilt the hip or something and he still came back and played with an artificial fucking hip but he wasn't the same guy yeah that's a ridiculous injury to come back from

he's a nice guy right i never heard of anything really nice um at the end obviously you get you get um to talk with him and he's he has this really um interesting way of speaking because he had to master a stutter so uh but but the stutter's gone but he speaks very deliberately and uh his thing right now he's like i don't keep any of those trophies i don't have any of them people ask where's my trophy room this is it and it's deer heads because all he does is he shoots his bow now lately he hunts with a bow and he's just got deer heads everywhere and he's probably great at that too he's so good at it lebron james i know LeBron James. I know I'm bringing the basketball. LeBron James was a superstar in high school. ESPN was televising his games when he was like 16, 17 years old. And he was huge. His high school would go up against some other good high school. Big, big deal. as the obvious number one draft pick there was nobody else who might have been the number one draft pick and then he lived up to the hype this guy has been a superstar since he was 16 years old since he was 16 years old he could get mad girls he could get into trouble police could look

the other way there has never been any real lebron james controversy no no he doesn't talk his hair sucks we know it's not there anymore yes and he's overly political i don't agree with his politics one bit that's the worst thing you can say about lebron james right yeah like dude if you took young woody and put him in lebron james's position there'd be some shit going down there'd be plenty of stories about broken windows and and stolen goods and who knows what else i i think trump would have had to get me out of north korea too is he like uh is he like a guy who's really into basketball like the game of basketball it's amazing i i have um

i i saw him interviewed afterwards they're like hey you know this thing just happened can you tell us what you thought of that play and from memory he tells you where all 10 players were on the court he details who got passed to who how it went down what he was thinking what the switch was and it was like oh my gosh like you remember this i didn't even understand all of it as it happened and and you can you have perfect recall of seemingly every play in the game that you just played. He is a genius at basketball. There's a guy.

The reason I ask is because like the best and the, the, just like LeBron, like the best, you know, you know, by far, no one is close to him as Connor McDavid in the NHL.

And he is like boring as shit in his interviews, but he's clearly just a guy who loves the game of hockey and sees, and sees three moves ahead of everyone else. But you were, and that's probably so good. It seems like they put the perfect basketball and hockey mind just happened to land in like the best body for that sport as well. And that doesn't happen very often.

That's why this guy's like a once in every 20 year talent because he, I saw this thing about LeBron James. I'm going to fuck up the numbers here, so don't get hung up. Most people take 11 steps to get down the court, and he takes seven. Oh, my God. He just strides longer. He's just bigger. He's stronger.

He's 45% better than you right off the bat. Yeah. When you said the guy remembering, it reminded me of this interview. So you won't know, you might know who he is. Stephen Stamkos. He's the captain of the Tampa Bay Lightning.

Very good. Very Canadian, like goal scorer. And he has this thing where he's been in the league for probably 12, 13 years. He's got 500 plus goals. Very impressive. And like,

this is just like, I can't believe they haven't done more with this for like the memes for their like social media team. But like this interviewer was like, so apparently everyone on the team is saying, you know, every goal you've ever scored. And if I mentioned one in a game, you'll tell me how you scored it. And he's like, I don't know about that. He's like, all right, April 3rd against Columbus, all right, April 3rd against Columbus, you had a goal. How did you score it? And he'll be like, I remember goalie was Sergei Bobrovsky because it was April.

He was injured in May. It was a wrist shot from the top of the right point. And they're like, yes, it was a wrist shot from the top of the right point. They're like, all right, you had a hat trick against Arizona in 2013, almost like nine or eight years ago at the time. And he's like, first goal, breakaway, scored on the left backhand, second goal, top of the left point, slap shot one time or third goal, empty netter at the end.

And they're like, that's correct. And it's like, he just knows every goal he's ever scored. And it's like, how would you possibly know that? That's like autism. That's literally sports autism. Yes. I played men's league hockey. I scored, I don't know a couple

dozen goals i don't i remember like two oh i remember hang on a minute hang on a minute i ever scored all right so how many goals has that guy scored like 500 some all right so that's yeah oh 400 i was gonna try to complain compare this to women you'd have sex with, but no. 400 is a lot of women. Well, yeah, I haven't had sex with 400 women. Over point for me. Yeah, even so, you couldn't be like, June 12th, 2010. You got a blowjob.

Who was it? You were like, yes, yes, she could deep throat it. She did this cool thing where she got the head sloppy and jerked me off. That's right. He's a savant for receiving blowjobs. That'd be so funny. I'd be like, alright,

give me any date between 2000 and 2005. And it's like June 2nd, 2002. I beat off. September 17th, 2004. I masturbated twice that day. Whoa, this guy's insane. Right, right. That was male-female-female porn. Yeah.

It was MMMFFF. Have you been watching Chael Sonnen? Not every video, but many of them. I think that Chael is training, and I think that Chael is on a lot of juice right now, and I'm wondering why. Because Chael's knuckles are swollen and red, and I can see his bicep vein in both arms all the time.

And his hairline's not looking so hot. I'm wondering what Chael's up. And then Chael's video today was called, Could I Beat Khabib? Yeah. And it was a really good video. Because I perked up when I heard him say it. I was like, I don't know. Yeah.

So people don't know. Khabib is a much better talent. He's a, he's a undefeated fighter. Some would put him on the short list for the best fighter ever. Okay. Jail is at his prime, 30 pounds heavier towards the end of his career.

50 pounds heavier. Yeah. 205 versus 155 so him calling out 155 pounder is kind of like you know i don't know i don't know let's agree that khabib's a better fighter he certainly had more success but oh look at that i see his bicep vein in his right arm left a picture from here immediately. He's a little – I don't know. His face, he used to be so much thinner. His neck is so goddamn vascular when he talks. When he is getting to the end of a sentence and he doesn't want to take a breath, so he's just powering it his neck gets so big red and vascular like thick like a tree trunk um like he's definitely still on uh yeah at least well he says he is too so it's not like uh yeah i mean look he's he he admits to

cheating and the sport throughout it so like yes i think even it might have been that video but in one of his recent videos he's like i'm the poster boy for steroids in the history of mma and it's not that i like being that but i've accepted that i'm that yeah um yeah he always talks about being able to eye test and look at people tell who's on it do you think he stole the eye test thing from great doucette no no he's talked about that for a long time. I think it's parallel thinking. Well, yeah. And I mean, a lot of people do that. And there's little hallmarks

and call signs of steroid use for sure. And sometimes it's just as little as being like, way too fucking jacked, bro. You're just way too jacked. What are you? It's like, all all right i've got like vascular delts okay like i think that it's kind of hard to get vascular delts you gotta have low body fat you have to have squeezed enough muscle into your fucking delt that it's pressing the the veins against your skin but these guys have throbbing delts and they're just walking out even as a swimmer i didn't have vascular delts like

it's a delt heavy sport on the front especially you know like yeah like doing curl what i do have that i really like i had it as a swimmer too i have when i lift my arm i have like a divot here oh yeah yeah and um i used to to psych myself up in the mirror uh before a swimmer starts they go like this and they're like this is sort of the way and i would look at myself in the mirror and admire my own deltoids because okay it's a deltoid heavy sport like this and whatever amps you up to get you know in the winning mindset yeah it was it's it's probably my favorite part of my physique and has been since i was a teenager yeah yeah good delts are good. Good delts are good. They make clothes fit better.

I don't know. They make you just look bigger. So are traps. Those muscle groups make you look like a boxier, bigger human being. Shirt hang better if you have delts and traps. Yeah, clothes fit better. Everything does. But yeah, I think Chael's on some sauce and like today's

video i was just looking his knuckles are all red and swollen and he's like doing this with his hands and stuff and it's like this guy's been hitting stuff today his hands hurt he never stopped training he did stop dieting like sometimes delt not del dealt uh chale has gotten in positions where i'm like you're kind of a chunky monkey he's no daniel cormier true never never but like like taylor the fighter daniel cormier he always had a weight problem it was always like dude he's that guy that you point to like the pitchers in baseball like whoa i can picture him yeah he didn't look like he belonged in the ring. Uh-uh. He's a butterball. He's very short,

but he fought at a heavyweight thing. But he was the champ. He was very good at it. And you always wonder, if this guy could have laid off the chicken, could he have been the greatest of all time at, what is it, 180? 185? Look at that. So he must have been a heavyweight there.

He looked a little better at 205. Yeah. Well, that's not not representative i mean he that it's not like zach found his worst picture he looked like that in six fights like yeah yeah yeah i think i was remembering him more critically if you see a guy like that on the beach like no part of you is like what a fat guy who's never active. You'd be like, oh, that's a very powerful looking guy. He's a tank. He's a fucking tank.

Just imagine him, though, with 30 pounds of fat gone. What a freak of nature he would look like. He fights in a sport with weight classes, though. You're comparing him to dads. Does the fat help defensively?

Maybe the body shots? There's something to be said about the fat. It does help defensively, and I think it adds a lot of power. I think when these guys are walking around this big, they're just moving around a lot of mass. A lot of meat. He seemed to know how to use that. I'm not saying anything anyone said is wrong,

but his cardio would be better. He would move better. How about this? What if because he is this short butterball, when he gets on the inside to do that wrestling stuff, he's just perfect for throwing things over him? Like his body shape is aiding him in the wrestling. Could that be hard to move?

He's a sphere. If he had less fat and more muscle, wouldn't he do that even better? You would think that, look, like I do, I do accept your Sonic, the hedgehog argument.

There are certain moves he can do. I was thinking critters. You know, you know what I just thought of that's brilliant is you, have you ever seen a honey badger where people grab the skin and the skin is so loose that someone can that the honey badger can pivot within its skin and bite you the ultimate fighter is someone who has lost 500 pounds and has not gotten the skin surgery and they're in great shape now.

And now they are impossible to get a purchase on. You try and wrap them up, your face, oh, you had rear guard? Hey, bud, pop, pop, pop. You just turn around because you're so free in there. Like flabby tricep. You could get a big handful of that flab and cast it like a net, like you were in the arena. The new dirty thing would be like,

all right, no fake pretending. You're not trying to suffocate him with your skin folds on top of him. Folds in the mouth, folds in the mouth. Just get that out of there. Folds in the mouth. Because people would immediately start being like, oh, I didn't even realize my big fat tricep fold

was preventing my opponent from breathing. Oops. It'd be like the new eye poke. You're allowed to do that. Fistfuls of tricep skin into the guy's mouth. You're allowed to cover people's mouth and stuff, right? I'm pretty sure. Yeah, you're able to like,

yes, people hate it. They hate it. You can see them fighting it like, oh, like trying to get air. It's real shitty. And oftentimes, like the hand is like trying to get air it's uh it's real shitty and oftentimes like the hand is like covered with sweat and blood and it's just like oh yeah you're getting my nice little face wash yeah yeah i'll redistribute the snot that you're dealing with because you've been punching the nose all night yeah it's a real nasty fucking sport um i'm

looking forward to the next one i guess i haven't any good. I guess they didn't have one this last weekend. Is anything cool coming up? Well, I think it's big that Valentina Shevchenko says that she was going to fight the winner of Nunez-Pena for the 135-pound belt. And my prediction is that no matter who it is, she wins. Because I think she won at least one of those fights that she had against Nunez in the past. It was one of those things where when the scores were read, I was like, what? Come on.

Did she have decision losses? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, to Nunez at 135. And I think she's the best that there is. She's the best looking that there is. I mean, in the ring, like when I see her move so fast.

Oh, you're right. I'm sorry to interrupt you. And her last loss to Amanda Nunes was a split decision. So at least one of the judges agrees that. I'm telling you, I'm telling you, she won that fight. Like if you went back and watched, you'd be like, she was hitting Amanda at will and staying out of Amanda's range,

and she never got punished by all that power Amanda has. She was using those kicks so effectively. I don't remember if they ever went to the ground. I think they're both pretty good at that, so I think it was mostly a stand-up fight. It's been four years ago now almost. But anyway, no, I thought she won that, and I think she'll win the rematch

because I don't know how Manunia has lost to Pena anyway. Pena's great at like – Change teams. She's not doing that thing where she's like, you know, I can't believe it. I can't believe I'm here. She's like, yeah, I'm here. I said I'd be here, and that's what I did.

She's like milking every bit of – I like that she called out fedor if people don't know fedor is arguably the greatest heavyweight male fighter in the history of the sport and uh all she wants is a payday that's her point by the way she's like 33 or something i don't know how old she is yeah um and pretty enough what'd you say pretty enough yeah yeah she's pretty enough. What'd you say? Pretty enough. Yeah. Yeah. She's pretty enough. But the 33 thing I was harping on because she doesn't have a long careers champion, right? It's not like she's going to be champion five years from now.

No fucking way. She probably won't be champion next year. She knows she has a very short lifespan as champion. So what does she want to do? Money fights. Bring me the money fights. They're like, will you rematch Nunez?

Yes. How much? Then will you rematch nunez yes how much then will you bring on fedor i don't care you give me a million dollars i will fight the greatest man to have ever stepped in the octagon and i'm like i like it it's a good look so she's she's doing the current season of the ultimate fighter the reality show that the ufc has you know around its sport where they bring up upcoming talent and they have and they and they pick them with their fucking reality show and uh and what they do taylor is they have two people who have a grudge or a big match coming up and they have them be the the captains of the teams so they have this amanda nunez woman and this pina woman

each coaching a team of fighters and and but the problem is amanda nunez doesn't speak fucking english like she sounds like she's deaf that's she sounds like she's deaf when she talks and like they have to edit it so heavily to get around the fact that she can't fucking speak english that you just hear her say they're like picking teams and it's like cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut because if you let amanda nunez talk for five seconds she sounds retarded so you just hear kathryn and it's like then you see katherine walk over cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut they're trying so hard and then did her team lose and then pina's got so oh it's a molt it's a full season of this shit it goes oh i didn't know it's not ugly oh it's it's yeah i couldn't watch more than 10 minutes of it because i pay so much goddamn money

already for ufc content and i i got like i fast forwarded through like 10 the first 10 minutes just trying to get through the slog it's just trash because the first like 30 seconds was was peña the girl that we talked about wants the money fight talking about zip recruiter. I'm like, I pay a monthly fee just to have this channel and then $75 an event. And this cunt with his caked on makeup is telling me about zip recruiter before I can watch her fake ass reality show. And I literally just hit the home button and went back to YouTube where at least I, when I pay them, they cut the ads out. Yeah. Well, I will not be checking that out I'll watch the rest of Shorzy though

yeah check out the rest of Shorzy uh I do recommend it's six episodes it's like 22 minutes a pop so I mean it's like a it's like a movie watching the whole season of this thing and uh and they do work in a lot of funny little jokes. I like him as a character. I like how awful and nasty he is. And I like they still at the same time write him to be like a good guy in a way. Very sensitive. He's very sensitive. I wouldn't say woke, but well-adjusted perhaps. He's not toxic.

It's not toxic masculinity by any means. It's just toxic. He's just a little gross and rough around the edges. He's grown up. Well, you get a little window into how he grew up, so that's fun. His sisters are great. That whole thing was hilarious. I look forward to you watching that episode.

But yeah, they did a good job. I hope they get picked up for another season. And I like, I don't know. I like that he's like built up as the dirtiest player in all of hockey. That's kind of fun too. Yeah. Yeah, it is funny. I enjoy it because it's a hockey themed show also.

That's what I thought. Yeah. And like other things I'll be, because it's, it's not like Mighty Ducks. They'll do a couple things where I'm like oh someone who actually played hockey like is out there doing this because that guy knows how to skate like that guy is doing that's what i was gonna say next i was gonna ask you like so like outside looking in i don't know a lot about hockey but i can infer a lot like like from the way they're speaking about things and i'm like this is written by like really passionate hockey fans who like know the ins and outs and the nitty gr really passionate hockey fans who like know the ins and

outs and the nitty gritty like like these guys like having the spit and chiclets guy on the on the panel like i recognize that guy right away i don't know anything about hockey but i know spitting spitting chiclets like i know that guy's on there and uh no it's it's a it's a it's a hockey fans passion project is what it feels like that's a great way to put it and like i looked up the main guy and what is the main guy's name it escapes me main guys i call him short christ yeah that's name being shorzy probably not that i've jared quiso that's his name jared quiso he played uh looks like Junior A, like everyone did, which is like a hockey league.

And he played with Jeff Carter, who won the Stanley Cup twice. So I imagine that his first dream was being in the NHL, doing all that. He's a big guy. He looks like a pretty sizable guy. He looks, I mean, well, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe he just stands well. No, I mean, I don't know how tall he is, but he looks wide. He looks like a pretty sizable guy. He looks, I mean, well, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe he just stands well. That's the other, like. No, I mean, like, I don't know how tall he is, but he looks wide.

He looks built. He looks, yeah. It's hard to tell. Farm boy. Yeah. Good show. I'm hoping they make more of that. Other than that, I don't have anything to fucking watch right now.

I've been sad. Every time I try to pick up a new show, he actually doesn't look as big as i thought he was gonna look here like he looks pretty lean there he looks pretty lean yeah he doesn't look very wide either no he's got a great physique though he also looks a lot younger in this i think i don't yeah it's hard to get those lower two abs isn't it yeah i feel your pain, it's those long... Nah, it's easy as shit. We were talking about it. He puts a burger down, really.

He's in great shape. He's in terrific shape, but he still has a foreback. Yeah, I mean, abs are genetic to some extent as well. Not as genetic as calves. My trick is to convince myself

that my upper two ribs are the top two abs. I have a six pack. I just apply a little liner down there and just draw them right on in. That's how I got my ten pack. I just lean shirtless into a chain link fence for 10 minutes.

You look terribly ill now. I walk out and they're like, oh, he's got those He's got like 60 really sore looking abs and little diamonds all over his torso. Yeah, I've got nothing to watch. I watched

some Seinfeld earlier earlier today i've been watching this youtuber who just makes fun of steven seagal uh so so like every he just takes every steven seagal movie in order and watches 20 minutes of them and riffs on it and uh you would think that would get old but i'm like 15 videos in and and like because he started at the beginning of steven seagal's career when he was making decent films and he's going to the end like because he started at the beginning of steven seagal's career when he was making decent films and he's going to the end like now i'm in the point like 2008 2010 at this point he doesn't get out of the chair anymore he's just sitting in the chair and he wears big body armor and a shamag a shamag is like a a man scarf um like one of those arab scarves that's you know

there's lots of ways to wrap it but he wraps it around his double chin. And so he's got the scarf around his double chin and the big body armor. Like if it were Tarkov, it's like the fort armor or whatever. It's the one that hangs way down to your dick and covers all the rolls. It makes him look like a Ninja Turtle, though. And he just kind of sits there and says ridiculous things. Say, I'm'm gonna snatch every motherfucker birthday that's a direct birthday that's a direct quote i'm gonna snatch every motherfucker birthday

is english his first language in that film well that's great because it's funny you mentioned that because seagal is like santa claus he speaks the language of all the children so whenever there's a scene where he needs to speak russian like there's one scene where he goes from you're not he's speaking this guy in spanish you're not spanish you're arab and he switches to farsi immediately starts speaking in this like like uh this this uh middle eastern dialect but he'll only do it for like four words because that's all you can memorize quickly when you're when you're just going biggie, biggie, bum, bum. You know, he's just making shit up sometimes.

And then he'll be cast against people like Danny Trejo, who's a fucking Mexican. And he'll try to speak Spanish to that guy. And then Trejo will, of course, speak fluently. And he'll be like, all right, back to English. He had that show where he was a cop, right? And he's with cops harassing people in New Orleans, literally stopping people like, you got anything?

Like shaking them down. I've never seen that. There were so many traffic stops. We're like, well, that's another one that just hadn't done anything wrong. It turned out that we just harassed with our lights in his face and had Steven Seagal yell at for a minute the one guy the one guy like they found some weed on him or something he's crying it's

this white guy and he goes i'm so sorry mr stallone what a compliment steven seagal goes this guy thinks this guy called me stallone yeah no i wish yes he's gotten so fat for so long now and like like i said he does that akito stuff akito has a lot of like moves that i don't know look a lot like this to me where you're like grabbing people and redirecting them it's almost like tai chi sometimes with all the flowy nonsense a a lot of cardio. Well, like he's supposed to like legitimately be good at it. And the fact that I think, I think the fact that he's six, four to 20 lean was like why he was so,

he made a keto like so practical. It's like, you're a giant man. I think you could make up a martial art called, called fluffy hands and huge. He's, he's one of those guys who's notorious for beating up stuntmen and actually hitting them

because it looks better. I bet it does look better. Also, sexual harassment. He's back, too. He's pretty strong, actually. I give it to you. In the dead. Not anymore, but in the 90s.

Now we expect our action stars to be a little more juiced, like Thor. Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure. Fucking, I need to see that movie. We should wrap. We got to do our hangout right after this, I know. With our precious, precious $50 patrons.

Very good. PKN 406.