Painkiller Already - PKN 544

Episode Date: January 22, 2025

Smelly burp. Welcome to PKN 544. That was rough. That's like where you do it internally and then you go. Yeah. Yeah. I had like really bad heartburn and like maybe an hour before the show

and I'm out of anti acid. So I just took baking soda and mixed it in water and took a big glug glug of baking soda a couple tablespoons worth and it just it's I've been burping the most disgusting burps. So I just took baking soda and mixed it in water and took a big glug of baking soda, a couple tablespoons worth. And it just, it's, I've been burping the most disgusting burps, but it got, it gets rid of a heartburn immediately.

It's wonderful. Yeah. It's a good, it's a good remedy. All the acid. Yeah. Baking soda is one of those things. I bet if you looked it up online, it's like, it used to be used for XYZ, ABC by people up until the thirties, like a. Like a magic sort of powder where like half

of it probably worked really well like antacid and the other half was like, you know, headache cure where it was mostly placebo. Hmm. I know it's used in cooking and baking a lot. I got up yesterday morning at 8am like it was Christmas morning when I was a kid. Not Christmas for you. You're a fucking Grinch. You hate Christmas. This is a better. I hate in his heart. I got to hate my heart. I got like the Grinch on Christmas morning.

And I was like, it's time to count our victory coins. And I watched Trump from the crack of dawn until I guess he went to sleep. I watched the whole thing. I never left the TV. I played my audio book and muted it whenever something interesting wasn't happening. I'm still in the audio book. It was a perfect little combination of just the whole day. I saw every scrap of it. I caught every snub in every speech. I caught every mean jab and jake. I caught every mistake and cringy moment from the Trump family. It was wonderful.

It was one of the most entertaining days of television I've ever experienced. It was like a terror attack or something. It happened. Those are the only other days where it gets this good when there's been like a head with nine 11 is nine 11 was one of the, yeah, yeah. Nine 11 was a big day. Yeah. Lots of news coming in and you're learning content. Oh, it's right up there. The Trump inauguration in 9 11. Yeah, there's a war, right? This might be this was as good as a small war.

This was amazing yesterday. I I mean, Melania dressed like Cad Bane from Star Wars coming in with a hat. That was sick. Yeah, I saw her dressed like like spy versus spy. It's cool as shit. She's so hot. Baron would look very barren. Six, nine or something like that.

I heard six, seven. I'll Google it. I don't know if that counts for anything. Something crazy towering over everybody. They got to the arena and Donald's introducing everybody's like, and my son Baron, he's very tall. Look at him. And like Baron stood up and the crowd starts cheering for him. It's like 20 and my son Baron, he's very tall. Look at him. And like Baron stood up and the crowd starts cheering for him. It's like 20,000 people there alive. And he goes, can't hear you.

Can't hear you. And they're like, and then the crowd roars. And I'm just like, that was the cringiest moment. For the most part, obviously, he didn't put his hand on the Bible here. I the reason he did is because this thing was so poorly... What would burn, Trump or the Bible? Oh, pardon? Had they touched?

Which one would have burst into flames? He would have been sucked into the book like Jumanji. And he would have had to have lived several Bible stories, Kruger McCutts style, until he learned his lesson. That's the little movie I'm working on, but nobody wants some part of it. No, no, you're scripting it. You're pitching it. Yeah. Melania like sidled in late to the scene with the books is what happened. She like forgot she's supposed to be holding his books because they swore

in JD before him and like a different and it was a different person is reading JD the thing and repeating it back and different people are holding the book and it's a whole thing. And then Melania didn't slide into place until like the last second with bibles and get his hands up. That I don't know. I know people, some people talked about it. I don't care about that at all.

It's a little faux pas that I could have made. Yeah. But she's also a model. She should know where she should be standing. Let's be fair. She was, um, I watched, uh, I. I watched. I watched. Who's the guy from Facebook? Zuckerberg. I watched Zuckerberg staring at who owns Amazon. Somebody. Bezos wife. Bezos whore wife showed up like Sue Ellen Mischke from Seinfeld. She was wearing a bra and a blazer with nothing underneath

She's got her big fake titties out in the inauguration next to all of these old fancy people. We get a picture of this Zach Oh Everywhere the internet ate up. I saw that I want a picture for the show Zucky's airing at them titties and every time she'd get up to like take her coat off She's like shaking them big titties and they're going everywhere. This this doesn't show us any there's a better one. Yeah, where it's like, he's not looking at her boobs. He's innocent. Well, we can't see your boobs either. He's there we go a little sneak peek. Yes,

check in the fit of her jacket. That's the most human he's ever been. That was hilarious. Yeah, I might. Oh my God. That lady looks a little bit like a reptile, but I'm into it. That guy in the back? More obvious. He looks like he was SQN for lolz. Do you lean backwards a little? I can't see.

Dude, this is exactly like the Sue Ellen Mischke Seinfeld. That is just a bra. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's a bra, not a top. Oh, I know. Oh, I know. She's got a fucking Amazon basic shirt right beforehand.

She's the richest. Pretty trashy. Or the second or third richest or something. No, it was fantastic. The whole day was a shit show. That's Trump had been sworn in and he'd moved on to the luncheon and um, he wasted, he, I won't say wasted after he was sworn in, he spent maybe 35,

40 minutes on a second speech to just his supporters in the next room. And then he left that speech and went to the luncheon and gave a speech. And then he left that speech and went to the luncheon and gave a speech and then he left that speech and went to maybe probably the arena next and gave a longer speech but while he was at the luncheon Elon was at the arena and he figured he'd hop on the mic and stir the crowd a little because hey 20,000 people there they've been waiting since the crack of dawn in that arena they were getting a little tired they needed somebody to hype them up and who better than Elon? I saw him take the stage and I was like, ooh, let's unmute for this. I like pause my audio book and I swear he throws that Nazi salute up twice within 90 seconds of beginning to speak. And I wrote to to I was chatting with Chiz and Taylor and

I wrote and I said, I'm not saying that Elon Musk just gave a Nazi salute, but everyone else is going to be saying that tomorrow. And Woody's right, there were two Nazi salutes. He gave one forward and then one reverse. To be fair, I did of course watch the whole video I know every inch of context. And he was saying, this is because of you, my heart to you, my heart goes out to you. And look, I saw that the way his hand moved, it don't look good.

He didn't do the thing the kids do. What do the kids do? He didn't do that. I don't know, I'm not a pedophile, but. But, but. Is he on much. You're joking there, He didn't do this. No, no, no, no.

I'm saying he could have done that. My heart goes out to you. That's what Taylor Swift would have done. No, he filed here. He wouldn't have done the Nazi salute. I didn't, I thought he, I didn't know that he was saying, my heart goes out to you while he was doing that.

He said it afterwards. He was saying it simultaneously. I was just enjoying the funny screenshot. He was like, my heart goes out to you with that awful accent of his. But again, it's, and look, I'm on his side on this, but I don't like his defenders showing all the pictures of every other celebrity or politician who's been caught with their arm raised at an angle because that ain't all it was. It's the full salute.

It's coming to his chest and then the out that is the salute. That is the sig-hail. But he didn't just get caught with his arm raised like, hey, I'm waving to those people over there in front of me. I'm waving to them. That happens so much when you've got people on stage waving to people every day for months and months. Eventually their arm goes up in an angle that you don't like. And there's a camera 360 degrees around them so they can get catching angle they want. But this was a video, saw him do it, bad look. Don't think he met Sighile.

I think he's just a very autistic man. But the result is the same. Let me jump in because I saw it too and I'm genuinely a little stuck on it. Had it just been this, right? Had he just done two Nazi salutes, I'd be like, I don't know. Generously, we could say my heart goes out to you.

And that's the end of it, if that was the only thing. If he wasn't supporting the AFD Nazi sympathizing party in Germany right now, if he hadn't taken all the Nazis and unbanned them from Twitter and brought them back into the conversation. If he hadn't done all this other pro Nazi stuff, it'd be easier to look at the pair of Nazi salutes and say they're not Nazi salutes.

But in the context of all the things that Elon's been doing lately, Nazi salutes fit super well. You don't like the AFD? Right. So we've been frozen out of German politics for their sympathetic Nazi policies. You know, where the not frozen. But Elon's bringing them back. Trump invited them to the inauguration.

This number two man in the AFD was at the end. Really? Yeah. Trump invited Nick Fuentes, another Nazi, to dinner with him. And Kanye, in the middle of all that anti-Jew stuff, he had, he met with him. Like these people give you every clue of like where they stand,

and I still find myself in a position where I'm supposed to look the other way. And I guess that's what I'll do. I don't know. It's not enough. I wouldn't convict. You got to square that. You got to square that anti-Semitism. Yeah. You got to square those suspicions of anti-Semitism with Trump saying, oh, Israel was not giving you the big bombs because I got you. Right. He immediately gave them their big bombs back. Yeah. Yeah. The idea that like Trump is Nazi is absurd.

The idea that Trump is a Nazi is absurd. I think a lot of the Elon Musk Twitter stuff comes down to framing. If you've been told by mainstream media apparatuses that anyone who is in favor of reducing immigration and prioritizing Americans at home, being more nationalistic for us, the citizenry, and aligning that with fascism and Nazism, then it's like, oh, he unbanned all these fascists and Nazis.

I'm talking about Nick Fuentes, a guy who tells you I am a Nazi. I am a Nazi. I am a Nazi. I hate Jewish people. I'm a Nazi. And Elon says, welcome back. I'm pretty sure Nick Fuentes doesn't say he's a Nazi, right? No, I think he does. Yeah, I think you self-proclaimed Nazi, I think.

And there's really no other way to look at it. He's cool with Nazis. People who have swastikas as their profile picture have been invited back to Twitter. Yeah, and like I would err on the side of letting those people on if it means everybody's allowed back. Because what was the setup prior, which was that anyone who's vaguely right wing gets deplatformed is not good. And so if we get those shit heads in. With him, like, I don't know, uh, unverifying people who disagree with him. Oh, like he's not the free speech guy.

He's the my speech guy. I agree. I agree with, uh, I don't like how he unverified and banned people for the H1B shit. If you look at what he actually unverifies people for and unbans them, it's when they go really hard against Israel, when they are anti-Semitic,

or when they come at him personally. That's who he bans. And so the idea that he's like this secret Nazi when some of the people who are still not veri- like, Nick Kuentas isn't verified. I see who he bans. And so the idea that he's like this secret Nazi when some of the people who are still not verified, like Nick Quintez isn't verified, I see his account right now. He can't get a checkmark because he won't give him one. He bans people who disagree with him. And that does not

include Nazis. Yes, he banned Asmongold. He did. He didn't know he actually didn't he Asmongold changed his profile picture. And if you change your profile picture, it goes through, that brings your checkmark back. Okay. And so he isn't like, all this to say, I always align with the free speech part. And I don't care if there are some shitheads that got allowed back on Twitter because the way it was for years was just untenable where it was only certain perspectives allowed. And this idea that,

that Elon is a Nazi when he's like going to Israel with Ben Shapiro and like holding the wailing wall, it's like he was, he was totally placating and bending the knee to the ADL last year being like, please let me have my sponsors neck, please. We'll ban antisemitism. And then, you know, he's not, he's not banning in the direct and you would assume from a Nazi. He's banning people for anti-Semitism or for coming down too hard on H1Bs.

Yeah. To your point, and Kyle said a similar thing. I'm sorry, Kyle, that it's hard to square this. He's a Nazi with his support for Israel. Right. And that's true of Trump as well. Like, but Trump is definitely pro Nick Fuentes. And he's also pro Israel. And I can't square. So where is Nick Fuentes, then he's also pro-israel and I can't square So where is Nick Fuentes in the news? he the last thing we got Nick Fuentes news was when those people were doxxing him and attacking him because he said

He was he was laughing about the reproductive rights Online and so people doxxed him and started showing up at his house to mess with him. One guy showed up with a gun like screaming Nick, Nick, he's outside with a gun. But then that one lady showed up and he spray pepper sprayed her, she fell down the stairs and everything and he had her phone. I think last I heard he was asking people to help him pay for his private security and such because I don't know, I don't know what number he quoted but it was something like 13 grand a month to secure himself. Yeah you you could be right. I, I always had it in my head because like I follow Nick Fuentes on Twitter, so I'll see his posts sometimes. But outside of that, I don't know his ins and outs. He seems like

a, like a Catholic authoritarian to me, like a theocratic, like we should all have to live under like Catholic doctrine. Is that not right? I don't follow any of those people. I don't like those people. I like funny shit. I like what I saw. All the J6 hostages got released yesterday. Every single one I'm released from their bind or stricken off

of them by the word of Donald Trump with a stroke of his pen. They were free. And it was funny. He was like, they asked him like, will this be, will they be free tomorrow? He's like, they should get on it now. He's like, take, get out, go on, go to get out of here, go get, get moving, get them out.

And I'm like, that is exactly what I'd want to hear if I was one of those people locked up. My favorite story is the guy, his own dad out for J six. This little cocksucker told on his own father for January 6th. They put that father in federal prison, took him, his whole family last night was at the prison waiting on daddy to get out because he's been locked up for 18 months or whatever. This little punk is on CNN. Oh, I'm afraid now. I don't know what to do. I keep calling the Justice Department, asking if maybe they can protect me or give me some sort of witness protection. And I'm like, you keep waiting on that phone call. Someone's cut out of the will. Even like he's Nancy Pelosi. Yeah, exactly. I was like, you're on your own, dude.

What a douchebag selling your dad down the river. Fuck him. You're on your own. What a douchebag selling your dad down the river. He thought, you know, I told my girlfriend that I was like, it'd have to be like pedophilia or like just just he's literally turning into a werewolf at night type criminal shit. Like, like, you know, like dad just loses control at night and kills women. What am I going to do? It had to be that like there's no way I'd wrap my dad out.

He was part of January 6th. He wasn't. Yeah. I don't like ratting your dad out. Side note, side note, unrelated. My father turned 77 two days ago. Oldest living Woodworth in history. I mean, as far as you know.

That's broad, but like in my little tree. Yeah, we've never, we know no one who's ever made it past 76 until now. So congratulations to Papa Woodworth. You're gonna beat that. Like your lifestyle is so hellish. My lifestyle is so dangerous. My father wakes up and rides his bicycle 20 miles every day. That's his just daily routine. Okay well he'll storm ahead for a while. That's a lot of miles every day. That's a lot of traffic Taylor. He's in Florida of Florida I think I know where he rides in the in the neighborhood. I'm not gonna know

He may have slow right now I got I got some my friends in Florida were texting me or just before we started up here and it's like not even just A little snow I maybe they were lying to me, but someone was showing a foot of snow in Louisiana Like like I saw 13 inches in Lafayette. I saw a picture by the Florida sign. It would, it looked like a sign you might find on I-95, you know, when you first enter a state and it was only a few inches, but it was legit snow,

the sort of shit that would panic North Carolina. We're not good at snow. I love that. I love that. They talk, look, I get climate change as a whatever they say it is. It's just like what they say. We've only got one more month.

The fact you're joking about this is really beyond. Do you not hear the world's ending five years ago? Oh man, whoever coined the global warming one though, that just didn't happen. It's just more extreme weather if anything. Anywho, I've never seen this much snow. We got five, six inches here. That's probably the second biggest or biggest snow I've ever seen in my life in Georgia. And then I've never even heard of snow down there where it's snowing today. Like down there in the Gulf Coast. It's snowing on the Gulf Coast on the beach.

I almost killed myself taking out my garbage cans this past week because we got like a foot and a half of snow maybe a week and a half ago for like four straight days. It just snowed and snowed and snowed and I shoveled my driveway but I did a lazier job than I should have and I was I was hoping on I was really banking on a bunch of salt doing some heavy lifting and it didn't do it and I did that because my driveway is kind of steep where I was like pushing my can down there. And then I was like sliding using it to counterbalance. And thank God there was so much trash in there to keep me with a little bit more weight. But it was one of those things where like I kind of skid to the bottom and then looked around, no neighbors. Nobody saw.

Nobody saw, back in the house. Dude. If they had, you just went, yeah. I'm down to like two degrees for like the last five nights and all the remaining snow. I've never seen snow lose all attributes. It's just a sheet of ice, the thickness of how much it snowed in a lot of places.

It's infuriating. When you shovel, and Taylor, I'm not telling you this because you already know. sheet of ice, the thickness of how much it snowed in a lot of places, it's inferior. When you shovel, and Taylor, I'm not telling you this because you already know, but to the people who don't live in a snowy climate, if you shovel badly, that's so terrible. If you shovel, you need to get it practically dry. Otherwise you get a sheet of ice and it's so much worse than four inches of snow. Like I would far prefer to trudge through

four inches of snow or even 18 then a quarter inch of that perfectly smooth ice on an incline. That is the end. Yeah, this is bad. No, North Carolina. That's not true. North Carolina. You do a shitty job shoveling and let the sun take care of the rest. But if you're in a cold climate, it's a bad idea. My neighbors have a heated driveway, like the ones across the street. And so, like, and they also have a snowblower. And so I'm out there this time. And every, for the last two big snows over the last couple of years, I've been like, all right,

I have to get a new snow shovel because the entire metal ridge of this one has fallen off. And so I'm hacking it ice with a piece of plastic. Oh, that's why it ice with a piece of plastic. That's why it was so bad. And by the time I remembered I needed a new one, it was already too late. I couldn't go out. The roads were too bad. And so I'm just like shoveling, like hacking at forming ice with this piece of plastic. And the two guys across the street from me are like going over it with a snowblower. And then as soon as as they're done like you can see the snow hit their driveway and become water immediately because it's unheated. Something else about these guys, I for some reason I thought that these like two adult men who live together across the street from me

were like roommates or brothers. You're adorable. And they, I think they're gay. And I think that they're almost, that's kind of like, that makes me a little more progressive. Actually, it makes me less progressive because they were always the neighbors that I had a little stink with because the people on both sides of me,

they welcomed me to the neighborhood when I moved in. They were very polite. The people across the street never even said hello. Oh, the opposite. No, not really. But a little like, oh, the neighbors that never bothered me at all. You're cool. Leave me alone. No, if someone moved in next door, like I'll go give them like a fruit basket or something, say welcome, like make them feel welcome. I don't want to be part of that. No, I mean, I guess you're going to be there for a while. That last place I was at, they came and knocked on my door

early in the morning and was like, hey, we locked ourselves out of our house. Do you have a ladder? And I lied to them until I didn't have a ladder. And then I started feeling guilty because they're trying to climb back into their house. They're stuck in the front yard. And I was like, hey, weird thing.

I found my ladder that I, and it's like a really nice place. My 12th, I produce a really nice ladder that clearly I would not have forgotten. But yeah, normally I don't like fucking with neighbors. I don't want to, I don't talk to them. My younger brother has in his neighborhood near his house, a couple of his neighbors are Indian. And he was sending me pictures during our big snow where he's like, I endure like our friends group chat. He's like, dude, this is unreal. I've been watching these guys try to shovel out their car for like half an hour of real time. And he sent me a picture and it was like nine Indians standing around like a Honda Fit. And they were like only shoveling out

like some of the snow in front of one tire. And then they were like flooring it and just pushing it down into harder, more compact snow. And my brother was like, I mean, golly, like do I need to go out there and show them how to shovel snow? Like, tell them what to do. And well, he's a good neighbor and a good guy. And so he went out there and helped

shovel out this Indian family's like little Honda, because he said they were making like the snow would have naturally melted before they discovered their car was like no longer pointed towards the road. It was like as they were just flooring it to the point that it was turning direction towards a yard, they just flooring it again. And that it was turning direction towards a yard, they're just flooring it again. And while he's out there, another Indian family across the street comes out and also starts failing at getting their car out. And so he had to help two different Indian families

shovel their cars out. They're just not familiar with snow. No idea. So at Cisco, in an effort to be a good company that gave back to the community, we would help out with these charities. My favorite was Habitat for Humanity. And I would go to the Habitat for Humanity work site

and I don't wanna overstate it, but I'm useful, right? Like I've done similar stuff like this before and I've built a deck or two, like I can do a thing. And you can follow the instructions of the foreman and you're good. These guys, not useful. The rest of the Cisco IT department, if we built your home, my apologies.

A bunch of Jimmy corners out there. A lot of bent nails. Dude, they're hammering, they put two hands on the hammer and they drop it as quickly as they can. That's why I have no fear. Those people are so uncoordinated. I, this is what I was going to say earlier when the snow shoveling, but I didn't want to be this mean they are, they are as uncoordinated as women.

Like I think of an Indian man, the same way I think of as a white woman, when it comes to like, Oh shit, that thing broke. Come on, let's get it going. We've got to get out of here. I might as well ask my girlfriend. She might actually get in there and shine a light. I would never want one of those effeminate, clumsy-handed, no-hand-eye coordinators, Indian men.

They don't have sports in school. And they don't value sports as a society and they don't have sports in school. And I think that that's related to why they can't just, if I put a hammer in the hand of someone, you know, who never really done any construction, please, by lunchtime, they're gonna have kind of a, you know, something of a hammer stroke.

They'll have sore thumbs and a good hammer stroke. Something like that. Have you seen that like grip strength study that's been going around as a meme? Where it shows like grip strength by different nationalities and ethnicities throughout like Europe and America and India. And the average Polish woman has a stronger grip strength than the average Indian male. Ah, I thought it was going to be a masturbation joke.

Like the average Indian incel has the strongest creep on the internet. No, they are having an angelic with their penis. Yeah, that's so funny. But yeah, they just don't know how to handle snow, which is like, They don't know how to run. They don't know how to throw. If you ask them to, hey, toss me that. They can't handle it. If you, if you ever like, Oh, let's jog and catch that cab. Oh, look at Patel. What are you doing, buddy? Why are you, why are your hands not moving? Yeah. Yeah. But Kyle, they hire each other at a rate that far exceeds most, most other

groups. And so they're excelling at that. I don't know how their cricket team beats anybody. That must be state sponsored or like they you know it has to be like where they play like Bangladesh. I think they play fucking Pakistan for blood. I have serious shit crickets their national sport and cricket and some I'm sorry India and somebody else are the top two countries historically. But yeah, if you want to pick a world champion cricket team, India's probably not too far off.

I'm way out of date, but that used to be. Yeah, my guess is it's a rich Indian people thing, probably a Northern thing. And it's definitely introduced when, during the colonial times, like just. It's basically baseball, but somehow more confusing. I don't know. I'm not going to shit on the game, but I'm also never going to get into it.

I've seen a good bit of it. It looks interesting, but I don't want any part of it. I've got enough sports that I don't want to watch. Australia number one. Wow. I just read India was number one. Oh, I just went to ICC.com. I went to Google's AI and there is no better source, Taylor.

Yes. Dude, I love asking like AI is something that I could immediately spot as fake, like just the topic I know a lot about. I asked about the Mike Summers. Who are the number three through seven top NHL, you know, assist leaders and they'll be like, like making up names sometimes. What is heian from? It's like what is pretty good. I mean like what planet was Justinian?

Goes to Vladimir Putin. What planet is Justinian, tetrarch of the ultramarines from? And it'll be like zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz's an ancient Roman name and he was a person and I think a lot of the Warhammer names are Roman or that I suppose not Roman or Latin names. Your current audiobook is Warhammer based? Yes I've been I'm on my one two three four I'm on my one, two, three, four. I'm on my fifth Warhammer book in a row. They're about a dozen hours each. Uh I I jump in. I love 12 hour books. I think that's about the sweet spot. A 37 hour book, a 45 hour

book can be a bit of a chore and a six hour book maybe never really got there didn't develop. Yeah, I I'm reading books that are connected and in the timeline and they're the recent occurings in the war number 40k universe So it's the dark Imperium trilogy. So that was three 12-hour books and then followed by another book. It's like Call and the great work or something like that. So I'm enjoying those thoroughly. Is there an order to these books or are you choosing your order? Yeah, there's a suggested order. It's one of those things where it's like,

oh yeah, these are sort of connected. And this one happens after that one. It's not super important that you read them in order unless you're just completely out of order. Cause there's Warhammer 30K essentially and Warhammer 40K. There's this 10,000 year gap in between the two where stuff happened, but the main story, big shit happened in 30K,

a big shit's happening now in 40K. So you wouldn't wanna like be reading 30K stuff and then slip into a 40K thing. But I'm reading the newer stuff that's come out in the last three or four years, I think right now. I have a prediction. As a book reader, something's gonna happen to Kyle

that happens to so many book readers. When Henry Cavill eventually drops his stuff, he's going to be unhappy with the variances between what he produces and what he knows should be true. I think Henry Cavill is a bigger nerd for that universe than I am. I know that Henry Cavill's a bigger nerd for that universe than I am I know that Henry Cavill is a bigger nerd for that universe than I am so I'll be fine with it Like he plays hard to be a bigger nerd

He plays that he plays the tabletop game. He's been playing his whole life like like he's okay He paints figures and has multiple armies He plays with other when they ask him a question. He doesn't have a vague answer. He's like, oh, yeah Well, you know the blood angels and love, love, love, love. I know outlines of the universe and I've read six books. It's just so big. It's just so big to know everything, especially those campaign books and all that information.

I do these live streams. And when we stumble across like an interesting part to explain Elden Ring lore, I get into it and I use deep voices and stuff. And they like the voices, but they're not interested in the lore. They don't get it. They don't understand Mesmer coming back and ripping and tearing until the entire horns that are done. The bodies piled 300 feet in the sky that we will see later in this playthrough. They're like, do the jokes again, Woody. This isn't funny.

No, do it. We got a Roy Dutry sit up, really get some in there and settle this story. RIP. Yeah, I have this guy that I'm listening to is really good. It's one of those things where it's like, okay, now I know everybody's voice or at least how he does

the voice of every, every main character. I find that men do women badly voices. Women do men worse. Like I at least get like, oh, this is supposed to be a woman. A woman is comically bad at like trying to do a guy's voice or something. Men do children well though. Really?

Please sir, can I have some more? And it's like, you go right in. Mark Stimson, Lisa. That's a girl. That's a woman doing that voice. That's what I'm saying. Women do the best kids. I was saying men do the best kids. I was saying men do kids well also. I don't know, who does

a kid voice in cartoons that's not a woman. I thought it was like industry standard because might be you always pick women. Who does Bart? That's a woman. I don't know her name. Nancy Cartwright. Or is that Lisa? Nancy Cartwright does a bunch of them. And she's also a Scientologist. So she does those Scientology like call things. She's like, Hey, there, this is Nancy Cartwright, the voice of, it's like runs through the whole thing. Like she's on the night show. And like, by the way, so your soul to Scientology. She's, I've seen her do it. It's really gross. Uh, those science. Well, the Bart lady is good. She does a lot of different voices. I don't know if Nancy Cartwright

is Bart or Lisa. Lisa is like the easiest job on earth. Does she do anyone but Lisa? Yeah, yeah. I think they all do multiples. Have you heard the Lisa voice actor talk? She's just talking. She sounds like Lisa. It's pretty close. I haven't watched the show in so long or cared about it, honestly. I mean, it's been, I haven't watched a new episode in maybe 20 years. Yeah. I don't want to do it to myself. I don't want to know. Have you guys ever been like pushed towards voice acting? Hmm. Sure. No, I've never thought about it, but it would be like such an easy, I thought for sure the two of you and especially Taylor,

cause he does so many accents would have heard he should do voice acting a thousand times. I've heard it and you've heard my accent. Oh, they just thought I had a good speaking voice. And this is like early in YouTube. And I guess I wasn't used to being gassed up. So I took it all as true. I guess my voice is pretty special, huh?

But now that I see what voice acting really is, it takes range to be decent. They don't just wanna hear you talk. They wanna hear you do more than you. And there's a big difference between being able to do an impression where you say like, like if someone can do Rodney Dangerfield, but all they can do is like,

oh, no disrespect. There's no respect, no respect but all they can do is like, Oh, no disrespect. There's no respect, no respect at all. Whatever he sounded like. It's like, Oh, okay. Now, now talk about, now I want you to complain at the DMV that they got your weight wrong as Rodney Dangerfield for this episode. And then he'd be like, Oh, wait, what? I can do the disrespect thing.

And it's like, no, you have to be able to do all of it. So I remember one time I was on the spot trying to do an accent and I was like, I don't know what to say or how to say it. And Taylor goes, those are the two most important things when you do accents. It really like kind of took the focus off of me and I appreciate it.

But if I gave you a script, could you be much better at it? Like, what if we gave that same person a script? They'd probably do okay, right? If it's written, well, yeah, if they knew what to do, and it needs to be written in the guise of Rodney Dangerfield, like the writer has to be good to I keep telling Taylor, I've been looking for an AI program that'll make little little cartoon animations for us. Because I want to get my my two scoops of valor. script off the

ground. That's that's about the black heroes of World War Two who ran the ice cream barge in the Pacific. You know, I don't know about this. It's essential to the world. Is it real? Yeah. Well, well, all right. So the real part is that there was an ice cream barge or there are two actually we had during World War Two in the Pacific.

We wanted to bring our boys some ice cream from home. It's like you've been fighting the nips in them treat them. The yellow monkey swinging from tree to tree out there blasting at you. You better be able to have a Klondike bar when you get back to the base camp or whatever. Anywho, they, they, yeah, they brought these two gigantic ice cream vessels to the Pacific. The amount of ice cream they could make per day is staggering because you had so many thousands of men. But I was joking to table

They always make these movies about like the black person from World War two who like got the mail going or the black women who? Did the math to figure out how you know how to get the space? Capsule to turn around or whatever yeah, it's like I have two scoops of valor It's all about the the black captain of the ice cream barge and how he saved World War two and beat the Japs Single he's the real reason we won. Yeah. Yeah captain Jeremiah crunch Dude I I was at an airport this guy I was first interested in the plane Something about this old biplane. I don't know how many cylinders the engine had but you could see them all and it was like 18 it was like something you don't see all the time

in this sort of rotary pattern. And then the owner of the plane comes out and he must be 80 something. Like he's super old. Turns out he flew in World War II. And he had strong feelings about, is it the Airman of Tuskegee? How close am I?

The Tuskegee Airman. The Tuskegee Airman. Thank you. And he seems to think their accomplishments were exaggerated and that they were not good pilots. They were kind of DEI hires that have been celebrated incorrectly. I remember on the show we looked up some analysis of the Tuskegee Airmen where the guy almost seemed and it wasn't some bullshit guy. He was like an Air Force history guy. And he was kind of writing in a way where he's like, you know, not to take away the valor of these guys from the bravery, but, you know, it's not like they were the best

pilots out there. They weren't slaying the way you'd be led to believe in pop culture. And it's like, okay, well, I don't, I don't really care either way, but seeing movies like Hidden Figures and all that, which is the one where it's like, did you know black women got us to the moon? It's like, well, yeah, we know our Hollywood engine tends to kind of create things out of nothing there to fit agendas and narratives. And it's so offensive. And you can say that without like taking away like, yeah, they were brave fighters and they

should be lauded for that, but you don't need to throw a bunch of fake shit on there. Black people, if I'm a black person, I'm so offended by this bullshit movies. Like, oh, look at this little thing you did one time black person. When there are, I always bring up that goddamn guy who was a slave, an escaped slave who like stole a Confederate naval vessel and like took it back up to the North and gave it to the Union Army and then fought in the war and then became like a representative for the United States.

It's like, make that guy's movie. Put Denzel in there. Let me see Denzel be the coolest slave ever. I would watch that movie. I would love that. But don't make up new nonsense and and and take Like these three black ladies who like oh, they're better. They didn't have a bathroom in the main building They had to walk across the street to pee. I don't care. Do your math do your math

I don't care big chalkboard fucking bull big chalkboard fucking nerds But you didn't invent calculus you're just doing it like like nobody's impressed. You know what I mean? Like there's a rule book. Nobody's impressed. You're fact checkers. They didn't get us to the moon. They like check any Kyle. Anyway, I appreciate their, their contribution. It sounds like they were a part of the team. I'll get their own movie though. Yeah, they just described them as part of the team. I don't know. you know, like, hey, this person was three levels from the top and they helped.

Well, I mean, if they told the real story, a lot of people wouldn't like it. It'd be like, and then the brilliant Nazi scientists that we couldn't have. No, no. If we were to make a movie about somebody, if you're gonna do a movie about somebody who's left out in the space program, do Michael Collins. You know Michael Collins, Wes Taylor? Nope. He was the poor motherfucker during Apollo 11 up in that capsule watching Neil and Buzz go down to the moon and walk around and kick rocks. I don't know him.

He's up there doing laps in the orbiter, waiting on them to get done having fun. I would have left. So we can drive them home. Fuck them. By himself down there for like a day and a half or something. I don't know how long they stayed on 11, like a day and a half. I would have made a stink about that, wouldn't you? I would have been like, guys, there's zero chance that I don't at least get a little traipse around the moon while we're here because I'm gonna, I came all the way here. Like I'm not gonna fly to Disneyland and then not ride a

roller coaster. Are you guys golfing? You're doing research? No, you're fucking throwing footballs and having a good time. Golf ball out of orbit. Not necessarily you or us, but like, if enough force can be applied to a golf ball to send it out, outside the earth's a qualified human could the golf ball would come up. No human can now. Yeah yeah i think it was further are we talking about on the moon on the moon yeah did i not make that clear i'm sorry on the moon because there's no air to slow it down and it's just gravity pulling it back how hard could you

put a golf ball in the moon's orbit with a club that'd be dope that would be cool but i feel like it would take a lot more than what we have. Cause there's still a lot of gravity on the moon, like relatively, isn't it like a quarter of the size or size? Enters my attention too though. Yeah. Escape velocity for the moon. And how long would it have to maintain fast as a golf ball? Go Taylor. Do you know this? Like well over a hundred miles an hour.

Oh, but approximately a hundred, like 120. Oh, shit, I would guess like 150. The escape velocity for the moon's 2.38 kilometers per second. You're gonna have to hit that thing pretty hard. You're gonna have to happy Gilmore. You're gonna have to smash it. You better get a running start.

All right, what about with a running start? I'll concede that. Maybe running start and then pull the trigger on your cannon. that's how I would have set up this base program like ACME a big slingshot on the moon to send To the planet. Yeah, I think Cuz I watch this whole really dumb question. No Incidentally, do you know the story about like the I think it's the fastest man-made object ever? It's a manhole cover.

I think the fastest now is one of those probes that they were able to like, yeah, it's gravity boost a couple times and it got just tall and ass. But like the second fastest thing mankind has ever done is that manhole cover over an underground nuclear test. And it they use a nuclear weapon to launch a manhole cover. And they see it for like one or two frames in the high speed photography. And like it's moving. They think it left Earth. They think they shot it into space. So there's just a manhole cover somewhere out there.

Moving. Just moving. Let me just say like, like that would be the best beginning to an alien movie would be like a flashback to that test. And then like 75 years later, and you just and rock music starts playing and you see that manhole cover. It's burning past past Mercury or wherever the fuck it is. City of Las Vegas. And it takes out but it takes out the aliens. That saves the day. It takes out their leader. Oh, that's where we're going. It takes out their leader in the midst of speech.

They're like, And it reads, sir, something coming in, moving incredibly fast. And then it like hits their ship and blows them off. And then they invade us because we accidentally assassinated with a manhole cover, a high ranking leader. Yeah. And that's how you get a...

And then it could even, when they arrive, could be the far future. And so it would be like a flashback and then a kind of flash forward. Yeah, that's what I want. I want the flashback. Which ends up being a flashback. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that. I almost like the whole movie being like the aliens are kicking our ass and then at some

point just like 75 years earlier. And they show that happening. That's the Deus Ex Machina that. And then at some point, just like 75 years earlier, and they show that happened. And that's the Deus Ex Machina that comes in and, you know, Wednesday. I like how stupid and tacky your idea of like fucking welcome to the jungle playing ball. Yeah. Dude, you know, you know, it gets you pumped though.

If it's like all hope was lost here. And then slowly you hear that music ride. Welcome to the jungle. We have fun and games. slowly you hear that music ride. And you see that manhole covered and it says like city of New York fucking, like, like water company, water, water and maintenance. And then the aliens are like, we were, we will proffer revenge on this new York. Then they invade us. But we've advanced. Elon Musk admitted that he is not the POE2 player.

He said he was. And then it was a shared account or something like that. He kind of made it sound like, you know, you can't compete with the Asians without sharing accounts as if he was like a co-equal partner in this account team, which is not the case, but he did meet admitted at least. I think that account was streaming while he was at the

inauguration. Oh, I heard that. I heard that. He's like, all right, cats out of the bag. Just do it. Just stream. Showed Elon on his phone. And they were like, Elon grinding POE in the at the inauguration. then I show side like splits her and they show him this you know his characters doing well did you see the the little video of Elon doing his like autistic nonsense and like standing

next to Baron and Baron looks kind of just fucking annoyed I saw all of it I genuinely watched it 12 hours of it yesterday non-stop trying to catch every moment. I think it was a historical day. I wanted to remember it. I wanted to see any like little one. I think that's when little mistakes happen, unless the internet catches them, then they just get erased from history. Because the next broadcast would be like, oh, yeah, just cut that part in the beginning where the audio wasn't off. I was like, I wanted to catch if especially with this presidency, I wanted to catch if there are any flubs or weird moments.

Oh yeah, I caught this moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What a nerd. There was another image where Baron looked even more annoyed. Is Elon standing on a box or something. How are they even remotely? It's the angle the cameras down low and and Barron's closer to us. Yeah, and that make Baron holler.

I believe there's a seating, you know, oh he might be like in the row in front of him like yeah, I mean a seating. Yeah, okay. Yeah, and it's the depth of field the camera. It's a barons making a lot of these famous guy. If I were getting my picture taken as like the new president, zero percent chance I'm letting a six foot nine guy stand next to me. Fuck you. Take a seat. Stretch. No, no. I'm gonna, everybody else is gonna be sitting down. I wish my dad had, wish my dad had impregnated a Slovenian six foot tall supermodel. Fuck. I would love to be six foot nine.

Look at Elon on the right. That's just photoshopped, right? That picture, that enormous man. Everybody else lined up for a picture and he's like, oh, I will stand four feet in front of everyone. Well, how would you do that, Mr. Elon? I like it. Now he's the same height as everyone. Is he short? I don't think he was. Now he's the same height as everyone. Is he? I don't think he was. That's his photographer, I bet. I always forget that Eric Trump is the one that gets passed over.

He's a pretty big boy. They're all big. He's much bigger than Don Jr. So I watched him signing his executive orders last night, one after another, and the guy was like, this one does this, this one does that. And he's signing them through. And obviously you probably heard he signed one, I suppose, directed at Birthright Citizenship,

which immediately triggered the lawsuits, which will go to the Supreme Court and then we'll see. Yeah. I don't know. To me, it's a very cut and dry, like that's what the 14th Amendment is. And it couldn't possibly win. But I also thought presidential immunity

couldn't possibly win. So here we are. Yeah. Well, we'll just reinterpret a little bit of this and that. I don't know what the original intent of the law is. I was told it had something to do with slaves. The original intent was to make sure that, yeah, the original intent was slaves

to make slave citizens. But also, the original intent was to make sure that, yeah, the original intent was slaves to make slave citizens. But also, Kyle, you can't undercut that Americans in the 1840s certainly intended this to apply to economic migrants from India. That goes without saying. Mexico and Canada also have birthright citizenship, but I'm all for removing hours because of the way that it is taken advantage of by a number of individuals. So I'm all good. I'm all good with it. I also saw that he stuck to his guns on Panama, Greenland and a number of other of those sort of outside the box kind of silly ideas that he's been floating. And that really surprised me. I expected things like Greenland to go by the wayside

and us to talk more about Ukraine, because that to me is the forefront of like foreign policies is sorting out Ukraine. I have a quick birthright citizenship and I looked it up. I didn't know this. It turns out that by and large, every country in North and South America

almost have rule of land. So if you're born there, you're a citizen. And almost every country in Europe, Africa and Asia, it's based on your parents' citizenship, with few exceptions. So I thought I was looking it up to see like every country does birthright citizenship, but it turns out it's a North and South America thing.

Yeah, I agree with you, Kyle. I think it's for the best because we're being taken advantage of with it. I saw the migrants crying at the border and that that perked me right up. He they immediately he did a lot of petty things. So so the so the Trump presidency comes in these waves. There's the big policy changes, but there's also this litany of petty changes and things that have clearly, he had like a petty committee get together. And think of petty things that they could do when they got back in. Like General Mark Milley, for example,

Biden pardoned him, he was on maybe the J-6 committee. He was a big thorn in Trump's side. Trump wanted to go after him, of course. He's been pardoned by Biden since they went and removed his photograph from the Pentagon, you know, and I mean, I mean, look at he split somebody is somebody new like somebody was looking at their watch and they're like, it's time to see fire.

That's what oh, well, he's not a general anymore either. But if he was all of you actually he was fired, but it was one of those he Trump put out a proclamation He was like all of these people just so you know, you're fired Mark Milley you're fired from the and it was like some like the president's association of Blah blah blah outreach and oversight like some nonsense position. Yes people had been given There's like three or four people that had nonsense positions like no notice today

You're fired and it just does the petty list of people that needed to be fired. I know there was a lady in the military who got fired some sort of DEI nonsense. The Coast Guard chick. That's it. Yeah. Yeah. So the previous person running the Coast Guard was guilty of burying like a ton of sexual assault charges and like rape and like problems in the Coast Guard. And he got replaced with a woman. Now replacing him, I'm 1000% on board with. If she's a DEI hire, you guys know I hate that as much as you do. But Trump felt like she wasn't securing our borders. I don't know if he feels like that or if he just says he feels like that,

but he said because she wasn't securing our borders from those immigrants that she got fired. Yeah, they killed the app that was helping immigrants, migrants get in and apply for amnesty or whatever it's called, asylum. They killed that app. And then you can just see literally they're out there like,

okay, okay. Like the app's not working and they're crying. And there's just photographers all around this old lady crying like, I saw that. Yeah, fucking vultures. And then I can just imagine, cry a little harder.

Tell me, tell me, tell me how your dreams have been crushed. What do you think of the TikToks? All right, we're full. That seems like a weird softball to give Trump with the youth like right away. So I don't know if y'all have heard Trump talk about TikTok. Give Trump?

Cause they've banned it. Who banned it? Didn't the Biden administration on like the last day? Trump talk like, uh, cause they like, like young people, uh, didn't the Biden administration on like the last year. So here's what happened. Joe Biden explicitly came out and said, I'm not banning TikTok. TikTok banned themselves. TikTok is like, I guess we're banned now. If only, uh, we could now when you open the app, a notification comes up that says Donald Trump will save us and then a few hours later

They're like we're back and I'm like, is this an orchestrated event or what? Well, no, I just specifically said he's not banning him. Biden said he wasn't enforcing it Ah, there's gonna be no enforcement there, but Trump is saying that he will enforce it unless they sell to an American That's his thing today. He's like you've got a trillion dollar Like this is his new bit. He's like, you've got a trillion dollars. Like, this is his new bit. He's like, you've got a trillion dollar product here. That's worth nothing unless I say it is. So sell it. So somebody buy it. And then take the United States in as a 50 50 partner. United States government will now be your 50 50 partner

in tick tock. This business that's now that's worth a trillion dollars, unless we say it's worth $0. And that's how you get to Have tick-tock in the u.s I'm like, oh my god and and trump has like I don't know who these billionaires are to his left He's like, yeah this guy might buy it. You want to you want to negotiate here in front of the press and he's like Jesus christ. No, sir Jesus christ, no, sir. What the fuck are you talking about? Look like a coordinated event?

Like tick tock shut themselves down when no one else was doing it. They put up a notification saying Trump is going to save us. And then they came back and I'm like, what is this show? Dog and pony show. It's called 3d chess. This was called. Yeah. What's the, I just want to say they made fun of 3D chess for eight years. And here we are. And every notable social media company, every notable billionaire, every notable person of influence has changed teams.

They changed teams. It's not like they were out there in the fog, in the mist. And Zuckerberg was just an independent. Like all these people were on the left's team eight years ago. And he's won them all to his side, among other things. Well, they're opportunists. They will go wherever the wind is blowing. They care about their bottom line more than they. It was past that they were banned, right?

And at the time they got banned, it was because TikTok was filled with videos criticizing Israel. And America is like, we're fucking, TikTok gone. You can't criticize is like we're fucking TikTok gone you can't criticize Israel we're done and now that TikTok is Trump feels like TikTok is on his side TikTok's fine and Biden wasn't going to do anything like he came out officially stated I'm not doing any against TikTok so they shut themselves down put up notice, I'll praise Lord Emperor Trump, and now they brought themselves back.

Can I just say, I love that he answered multiple questions on it, because they asked him multiple times last night in the Oval Office, well, he did a, I don't know how many press conferences he did yesterday, but it was his eighth maybe, and he's signing executive orders, free-balling questions. Anybody could ask him what they want.

It's just a madhouse in there, and they asked him about TikTok, and he's like, what changed your mind? Cause you said this was a threat to, they were spying on Americans, you know, America. And he's like, yeah, but this is mostly a kid's thing. They're spying on our kids for what? I don't think so.

He's like, look at your phones. They're all made in China. All of our devices are made in China. So if we're worried about being spied on by China, I don't know if TikTok is the place to start. And I was like, oh shit. He actually, somebody inject him with some Cochit juice. Oh, and the best part, the best part of the Oval Office,

we all know, I'm sure, the outgoing president writes a note to the incoming president, leaves it in the desk. It's something that I often think about with like this, like, ooh, I'd love to know. I wouldn't tell anybody if you just let me look at it. Can I see the handwriting? Like what kind of pen do you use for that kind of correspondence? But they're like, sir, sir, did President Biden leave you a note in the desk? And he goes, huh, let's see. I'm like,

you haven't looked yet. Look at that. And it says 47 with like a double underline under. He's like, huh, maybe we should read it of course he did but my great bit would have been like it would have been hilarious if he was like you're the best-looking president more hair than me or more sprite than me. Everyone, the entire country voted you're more attractive. Every night that you would beat her. Effortlessly funny sometimes. Just the mannerisms and his shit. I enjoy that bit of them. It's

very funny. Yeah, a new day has dawned. It's just the first 24 hours has now passed of Trump presidency. 24 hours has passed, so is the Ukraine war over? I believe that we are going to end the Ukraine war this year, I think, for sure. I think Zelensky's ready to talk. I think Trump's house is... Let's hurry's. I like that Trump didn't immediately turn off the tap as it were because that would be a terrible negotiation stance to begin with. Like that's something you negotiate, right? I think he'll bring Putin to the table and I think he'll fix it. I really do. And I don't think it's because I don't know why it is, but I think he will solve it. I really do. I think the Ukraine war will end this year.

I wouldn't take a bet against the Ukraine war ending. I do think with Trump as president, Ukraine is now in a much worse position and I won't be happy with the way it ended because I'll only be happy if Ukraine's restored. And I don't think anyone's predicting that. Yeah. I mean, like what it seems like is that a lot of the guys in

Trump's ear, as far as these geopolitical conflicts go, a lot of them seem to be really against the Ukraine war, just because they see it as like an opportunity cost of money that could otherwise go to Israel, where it's like they're not it's not even that they're like, hey, let's back out, take care of America first. It's like, hey, not even that they're like, hey, let's back out, take care of America first. It's like, hey, this money could go to our more favored ally down here instead.

And hey, we don't want to waste all this money and resources fighting Russia when we could start a war with you with Iran. But who knows how any of that will go. I have hopes that he will end these conflicts or at least pull us out of how invested we are. But yeah, I don't think it's going to be overnight. If it was overnight, they'd be sick. What is the justification for undoing the executive order on

lowering prescription drug costs? Wouldn't you like to know? Why is that good? Like someone explained to me why that was one of Trump's day one priorities. I have no idea. No idea. Probably some rich pharma company who wants to keep putting the screws to people. They bought yet another politician. I genuinely have no idea. Yeah. Like I don't know on day one, he gets rid of birthright citizenship or tries to and raises prescription drug costs. And I'm like, what are we doing here? No, the birthright thing I'm totally in favor of, like we're being taken advantage of there.

The idea that you can come here illegally from Honduras and then have a kid. And now it's like, Oh, now you qualify for, you know, welfare in the U S Oh, good G G well played. It's like, no, no, no. We, we're being taken advantage of. Shut it down. Yeah, I don't like it. I think birthright citizenship is right. I think sending children who were born here

back to some other country, they don't even have to citizenship it. Well, I don't think they're gonna do that. Well, what happens to those illegal immigrants, those children that are birthright citizenship? So they're gonna be grandfathered in, clearly, like anybody who's born today, right? Like you...

Well, let's not do today. Let's do like after this, let's say that it goes through and the executive order is real. Yeah, and some... You're born in like 2027, right? Yeah. Then you're not a citizen, boom, right?

That's what we're just talking about. No, no, no, if your parents are... We're talking about people who whose parents are not citizens. If one of your parents is a citizen, then you're in through birthright. If both of your parents are not, then the same thing would happen as if I and my girlfriend broke into Japan and then had a kid. They would tell us all to leave, which is what you should do. That's absurd that you can just break.

It's not a citizen of America. Right? He's born in Japan like that. Like he doesn't have a US citizen. Yeah, he does. He does. His parents are American. Yeah. Yeah. Just like in the military, like tons of kids were born on bases in Okinawa and stuff. Sure. If your parents, if one of your parents is a US citizen, then you've got US citizenship. But to Taylor's point, if you went to Okinawa and had a kid, they'd be like, get the fuck out of here. No, that kid's not Japanese.

Oh, you think that kid's Japanese? Wait, but I use the anti-global housing vouchers in WIC. Yeah, I don't know. I'm not a subject matter expert on this, but maybe it's just because we've always done it this way and it feels like it's race motivated to Say that oh, you know this this this killing us all these Mexicans having kids here anchor babies this that like it It feels like they do it on purpose

It is a they fly over pregnant like trying to trying to do that Like it's not like whoopsie daisy or it's oh I was fleeing from from the fear of my homeland And I am pregnant like no no you've like timed this not like, whoopsie daisy, or it's, oh, I was fleeing from the fear of my homeland and I am pregnant. Like, no, no, you've like timed this. To make their kids citizens. I agree. I think they really do do that. I don't know how widespread it is, but it's been done.

Let's all agree. It's thievery. Yeah, it is. They're stealing resources from a country. I think a very common situation is that the parents are here illegal, the kid knows no other life, he grows up here and now he's getting deported from what is to him his birth country, his, I don't know, identity, he's American, but because his parents weren't, he's with the parents. Like they're the ones who broke into a country. The victim is the person who didn't do anything.

That's me, taxpayer. The victim are also taxpayers. You know, if one of those parents... This guy could be very much a productive, wonderful part of America. Just because they're brown doesn't mean they're unproductive citizens. We're not just stopping the brown ones. No white, no yellow people. But they tend to be brown.

But like, you know, just because they're Mexican doesn't mean that they're bad citizens. No one's saying they are, but the idea that our policy- So you said you were their victims because of their existence in America. American citizens are victims when people come here and then compete for lower wages

against working in middle-class people who are then, they have their quality of life lowered. And so like, there's all this outpouring of sympathy for like, oh, look at this kid in this scenario where everything was, you know, hunky dory. And then they're also then they're 18 now and they know nothing else. Why is this kid that was competing for lower wages?

The parents who come here and they're- With the kid, using the kid as an anchor. The ones who will now live here. How does that work when you use your kid as an anchor? Do you get beneficial citizenship pathing if your kid is a citizen? Is that how it works? Yeah, you can, and it's easier, like with chain migration,

like once one member of a family has made a citizen, it's easier for them other families to apply or other members of that same family to apply and then come over in larger number. And so like our immigration system is fucked. Like, it screws over the working class. I saw those fuckers in Chicago saying like, if you're illegal, do not worry. Senior children to school. Do not answer the door. If they knock, do not answer. And I'm like, cocksuckers. What I genuinely hope happens is that they go into Chicago and I hope they arrest any public official law enforcement officer of any kind who harboring within your city, then maybe we should lock you up first thing.

Yeah. Like that fat piece of shit guy from Chicago who's so morbidly obese, he looks like a cartoon character that I can be there. I've heard enough. Oh, my God. I was on a run of mayors where they just all go to jail. He's going next. He's stealing donuts or something. All traditions are equally valuable, Taylor. Chris Christie, look at that slob.

Have you seen the pictures of that black lady who was their mayor a few years ago? She's a looker. She's always dressed like a Batman villain, wearing an oversized coat and a goofy hat looking exhausted. It's wild that you could win an election being so looking like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I thought you always thought you had to be like, you know, from central casting, like good looking, like Mike Pence looking kind of kind of kind of man or,

um, or, um, or something like that. News sounds not bad, you know, for, for his role, like it, it's far as. Mike Johnson has a very professional look to him. Did you hear him? Paul Bryan. The Speaker of the House was talking today. He gave an interview. Look, who knows if he's just given a ball.

Actually, I'll say this. I don't think Mike Johnson, that's his name, right? The Speaker of the House? Yes, yes, yeah. He's the one who has that masturbation app that makes you. He does with his son, yeah. And to me, that says,

this is a guy who probably doesn't lie a lot. This guy isn't a flippant liar. I bet he's an honest kind of guy because he's if he's that like serious about this, this this this spires to be as honest as possible in the role, right? Yeah, he said that it took him he for eight weeks. He'd requested a meeting with President Biden and they had pushed him away and he's like look, I'm second in line to the presidency. We had I don't't wanna go into it,

but we had a national security issue that was developing and I wanted to touch base with the president on it. It was keeping me up at night that I hadn't been able to speak to him about it. And as I went public, I said, I can't speak to the president. He won't take my meeting. It put pressure on his people. And I was given a meeting.

He said, but I walked into the Oval Office and it was an ambush. There was the head of the CIA. There was Kamala Harris. There was the head of the CIA. There was Kamala Harris. There was this person and that person. And we go round and round. And at one point, President Biden put his hand on my arm and said, Hey, guys, I think me and the speaker need a moment.

He said, you could tell everybody was going, Oh, no, he's done it. They had to leave because he's the commander in chief. And I asked him this and that and the other, and we touched base. And I said, Mr. President, one more thing. The liquid natural gas exports, why did we freeze those? Because the people in my state want to know. It was a lot of money that we were making, sending liquid natural gas to Europe. And by stopping that, obviously, we're fueling Putin's war machines.

Happy vendor, happy customer. This thing helps Russia. And just a quick, I'm sorry to interrupt, Kyle. Kyle is telling this perfectly accurate and without any bias, I saw the same thing. So carry on. And he's, I don't get it, Mr. President, why'd you do that?

He's like, oh, I didn't do that. I signed an executive order to do a study on liquid natural gas. I was like, no, Mr. President, you stopped the export of liquid natural gas. I was like, no, Mr. President, you stopped the export of liquid natural gas. I read the paperwork. I know what I'm talking about. You signed an executive order that says that I didn't do that. He said, I'm sorry, Mr. President, but could we ask your secretary to print out the order and go over it together? It's just like, I don't think he's making that all up as a as a bald-faced lie just a made-up

Nonsense lie. I think that's true And that's scary as fuck because what that tells me is that the people that were in that room before The president asked him to leave were the people running the country. It was Kamala Harris It was the leader of the CIA and it was whoever else he mentioned in that in that sentence Those three or four people that were in that room Who were like the president's handlers, as it were, for that meeting. Those were the people running the country

for the last year, two years, how many? Yeah. That's crazy to me. That always happens and it's just a matter, it happened to a greater extent under Biden, right? Who ran the country under Trump? Do you think Trump really knew the details of everything he was doing between four and eight years ago?

I bet there were a lot, he's not a detailed guy. He's not in on the details. But I think that it's easier to slip something by Biden. And yeah, he was run by his team more than typical. That's rough. Like he was an empty suit, just a figurehead for years. Poor guy. And we just had a bunch of special interest groups.

And there wasn't even really an honest pretense that he was running the country. It was like, hey, we haven't heard from Biden in six months. And it's like, okay, well, he's riding a bike today. Fuck, he fell. God damn it. They were hiding him. It's I amongst, and I and many others, kind of denied that they were hiding him for a while.

And you'd see him speak and I'd be like, look at his speech, look at his, here's a 40 minute speech. Do you want to watch the whole thing? Skip around as much as you want. And tell me if this is anything like the version of him that you see on Fox News News and it wouldn't be. But I think that it got to a point where it would have been

and maybe I was seeing him on a better moment and- They really- We all know- It only collapsed because the lie got too big. Like if that debate hadn't happened, no one would have whistle blown. No one would have said anything. Anyone who came forward and said,

this guy is not with it, would have been called a conspiracy theorist. No, make no mistake. The people who were actually like, That's why they flipped on a dime. The public strings were thrilled that the president was in decline. Oh yeah.

They were thrilled because they had more control. I can just imagine, they were like, oh man, just imagine the things that we can do now, now that we're the leaders of the free world. You know, it's a terrible scenario. At least like Trump might be like, Whoa, you did what now? Or someone who who is against some nonsense can be like, Hey, Mr. Trump, what were the liquid natural gas? We turned off liquid natural gas. That's my favorite kind. What are we doing? Like, like even yesterday, we turned that back on today, right? Like I bet the liquid natural gas

is flowing again. You think how many of those like shit ton of pardons that Biden did on his last couple of days? Like how many do you think was him sitting there going like, all right, guys, we got to buckle down and get this figured out. And like how many do you think was just pushing things in front of a stamp? Maybe he's a sneak. That's fine to me because that's how those pardons often go, especially with marijuana users, whenever those, they send people out to find those most deserving of those types of pardons.

And they find pardons that are going to be good for messaging and stuff. So I don't fault in for that. I don't fault in for the pardons that went out while President Trump was taking his oath while he was giving his speech. That's when they went out. They went once he was engaged, then the pardons happened. They happened while Biden sat there scowling with that chorus of our former presidents, backed by Dana White. It is the greatest image of all time. Maybe you haven't seen it, Woody, but Dana White is sitting right there with George Bush, Laura

Bush, Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, and the entire Supreme Court. The Supreme Court has the best seats. They're right here. And then just behind them is the Clintons, the Bushes and Obama and Daniel White is touching them. He is right behind them. Like one row behind them. It is amazing. I couldn't believe it. It was, oh, that's so great. You could tell he had this look in his eyes like, what am I doing here? Yeah, there, that's exactly it.

He's like, this is fucking wild. This is on the inauguration sit-by in President W. That is good seats, all right? Like, you can't buy that seat. I think you earned that seat by being Donald's actual friend and inviting him to your UFC events and shooting the shit with him for years Yeah, I agree. I think you're right. The rest of those guys bought their seats though

That's that's on the left side of the dais. Yeah, Dana's out of place Yeah, look at look at look at uh Clinton there he still looks okay from certain angles like like yeah, he's sometimes too thin I think but Hillary cackled and cracked up when they brought up renaming the Gulf of Mexico yeah, she she like started laughing. It was it was a great it look anytime you see her do something human It's nice to see because remind you that she is just a human being Despite everything else and it look if she if she laughed more like that and showed more of that side of

herself, she had gotten fucking elected. She didn't tell people the Pokemon go to the polls hard enough. I need you to Pokemon go to the polls. Hillary and how she looked more human. Dude, Al Gore was 10 times more charismatic post-election. Like everyone liked that guy after it was too late. Even South Park went back and apologized. You know that?

Oh, no, I didn't. So there's an episode of South Park tour, two of them called Man Bear Pig, or they serve, they're about the Man Bear Pig. And the idea is that Al Gore has come to town and he's telling everybody about this ridiculous monster that doesn't exist aka global warming and And and and man bear doesn't exist blah blah blah and they make fun of the whole first episode He's runs around with a cape like he's saving the day like he thinks he's Superman. Oh, I'm all gore

I'm here to something you've got to believe in my bear pig and they just rip on it for entire episode and like eight years later They started seeing like maybe Al Gore was a little bit right about some of that stuff. And they have an episode where he comes back and he's like, they apologize basically. And look, we found Man Bear Pig, we've got to kill him. You know? Like there's an actually a Man Bear Pig to kill.

So yeah, I said months and months and months ago that better than Kamala would be Al Gore. I know he's an older guy, but I think that he would stir something and millennials, those of us who remember that guy as being like of that old school politician ilk. I think a lot of those people would like him. I think a lot of old Republicans would like him.

And- There are half dozens of us still salty that Buddha judge didn't get the call. No, I remember the, I remember the hanging charge of the DNC. Put me in charge of the DNC as like a, as like an inner agent. I would be like, guys, we need this gay mayor everywhere. He had to make a big deal about it.

You know that like, you know that like smarmy way he carries himself? Yes. Absolutely. Get him out there. I like him. I know that everyone does. He's had on like train explosions and all sorts of things in the department of transportation. He goes into Fox News and wins all the time. You know, he did a town hall there. The whole fucking town loved him. He could go on one American news and show them the error of their ways. I don't understand, is that? Oh, they edited his head on the Asian man. Yeah, you can see it by his chin.

I see that one and I'm not Taylor. Taylor's the AI spotter. I don't understand what the meme is though. Obviously that's not him on the left. It's not even the head facing the right direction. Can I just say like when you throw the real one to the right, clearly, but like I always saw, you know, this little thumbnail, the guy on the left, that seems like could it be real? Like I wouldn't put it past him to have his fake titties on like feeding the baby. I thought it was real. I guess I never inspected it for, you know, I never ran its credentials, I guess I would

say. He probably just bottle fed his kid. Did he buy a kid? Is that what they're making fun of? He adopted a kid. Okay. How much did it cost to adopt the kid? I adopted a car a few years ago. It's not deductible to adopt a child. Taylor adopted a house about six years ago. child. Taylor adopted a house about 60 years ago. No, you buy those kids. That's the way it works. They're expensive.

I've heard people going through that situation where they're infertile and buying kids and it's tens and tens of thousands of dollars for a good baby. There's that great moment in Raising Arizona where the guy's like, how'd you get that baby? He's got, you got a healthy white baby. They told us all they had was an Asian and a Negro born with his heart on the outside. He was like a bargain bin shopping for children. Like that's all he wanted more.

Like you've never seen Raising Arizona. It's a Cohen brothers movie. It's wonderful. It's on Plex. I promise if you watch it never seen Raising Arizona. It's a Coen Brothers movie. It's wonderful It's on Plex. I promise if you watch it, you'll love it It's a childhood favorite of mine all the Coen Brothers shit is good, but it's got John Goodman Nicholas Cage I like a bunch of other people but basically the Nick Cage and his wife are infertile and he's a small-time crook he they met because he every time he goes to prison to get his mug shot taken she would take it and she was she's a cop and and they their infertile can't have a baby she's so distraught that her life is fault she loses her job she sits all day she's she's gonna kill herself and lo and

behold the richest man in Arizona Nathan Arizona has quintuplets or something crazed like aptuplets octuplets like eight of them and they're like We're gonna they got more than a hand that man had too much already too much money too much I got more than and his wife has this act they got more than handle. They got more than handle high Now go in there. Give me my baby And so he's climbing the ladder In the mansion stealing a baby and they all end up crawling away from him and they're like trying to crawl in and he's losing his mind and he goes back to cars. Baby, I couldn't do it.

They was crawling all around. You get back in there. Get me my baby. Hi. They do. They steal a child and then it won't even notice one. Wonderful movie. It's very, very funny. I looked up adoption numbers because if I was a viewer, I'd want to know how much it really costs. Adopting out of foster care is $2,800, but those aren't the good babies. They're not babies either.

A private agency, oh, they might not be babies, true. A private agency averages 20 to $45,000. Yeah. I think if you want yourself like a Chinese baby, I think you're in for some import fees, some tariffs you gotta pay. Trump's raising those tariffs, that's gonna fly to the babies.

But if you want like one of those broke down used models, like one of those certified pre-owns, you can get like a 13 year old kid with troubles for like $2,200. Yeah. Dude, you can get a horrible 2011 kid for cheap. Yeah, just some kid who's always suspended from school because he doesn't have any positive.

You can get you can get an eight year old that scribbles all day for $1,200. He can always talk. I had an aggressive dog. It made me learn about nature versus nurture. Some dogs are, you know, there's no dog, no bad dogs, only bad dog owners. Yep. Big dog wants you to believe that nonsense.

There's a whole breed called pit bulls. I've seen dogs that are vicious and want to kill people. Oh yeah. You had them. Dack. I get it right. Well, that's protected. Dack. Dack. Did I get it right? Well, Dack's protected. See, the difference between that, like, there are dogs

that will go in Rome and murder people. I saw there's a police activity video where the police are chasing two murdering pit bulls and, like, killing them, like, chasing them down. Like, dogs go crazy and get blood thirsty and kill children and rape children and murder people and eat their owners. And then, again, there's that ridiculous syndrome thirsty and kill children and rape children and murder people and eat their owners and then again

There's that that ridiculous syndrome where if you have a seizure around your pit bull It'll eat your face off and try to kill you something about it sees you is like a wounded pack member Or maybe you've been affected by something and like it's gonna call you out of the pack now Hmm You know, I'll be would just lick my face little Murphy little Murphy just yip a little he wouldn't which of your dogs would be the most aggressive Toward me or toward another person? And so Toby almost easy. I'll be Toby went after an Indian guy in a parking lot yesterday. I took I got Toby

I see the moment down syndrome or that dog died. So Toby's got Toby's the Bernie Doodle He's about 70 pounds and and and a big big fancy boy He saw that I got it. He's shaved down now. He's looking he's looking fancy I I sent him but we were in the parking lot after he got groomed and some Indian guy was Like Toby really he's MA. He's MAGA. Toby is MAGA. Yeah. Yes.

Oh. Well, I think that's a, that's a PKN, isn't it? Well, I guess it is. Make America great again. And have a wonderful day. We'll go back to my audio book and make some dinner. Make America Great again. And have a wonderful day. I'm gonna go back to my audiobook and make some dinner. PKN 544.