Painkiller Already - PKN 550

Episode Date: March 5, 2025

Pka 550 just the boys. What's up boys? How's it going? I was having a good day. Going well, I think. I beat Dark Souls 3 today, doing the DLC now. So expanding my Souls resume. Is it kind of disappointing going back through them? Like, is it like, oh,

they don't have this quality of life. Oh, they don't have that quality of life. Good question. Honestly, I put the have this quality of life. Oh, they don't have that quality of life. Good question. Honestly, I put the two games kind of equal and this is for like my personal ranking. It's okay, quality of life, yes. There's some things missing. I hate that I have to like go all the way back to the Firelink shrine to upgrade my character.

Like that sucks. Whereas in Elden Ring, you can do it all over the place at every set of grays. There's a couple of things like that that I miss. But what I like is in Dark Souls 3, almost every boss is the kind of boss I enjoy. Not mad at hard bosses. Hard bosses are great.

But the boss should be hard because he hits hard, he hits in five like swing combos. He hits fast and slow and mixes it up that kind of heart I like the heart I don't like is he teleports somewhere else all the time Yeah, and then hits me with range attacks while I try to close the distance the heart I hate is he's a dragon flying in the air that makes the whole fucking Stadium catch on fire and I'm like what what's the dodge for this? The whole stadium's on fire. Dark Souls 3 has very little of that. Elden Ring has much more.

Dark Souls 3, I really like almost every boss fight. So I enjoyed it. You rolled through Dark Souls 3. I had chat helping me. And that thing that I like is also, I'm good at it because I practice it a lot. I have like mods and Elden Ring that just let me fight bosses again and again. And I get my favorite ones and that like chest to chest two nights battling. Never,

never skip one. So I'm good at that. And that's what Dark Souls asks for. And then when I'm terrible at navigating, knowing where I am, knowing how to get to where I just got to six times already. It's embarrassing. It is embarrassing. I feel so bad about myself. Like I am just ganned off again and again. Like I have no recollection of this place. I don't remember this place. There's no memory.

Thank you. And then like sometimes chat is brilliant and like really helps guide me through it. Sometimes they're unintentionally trolling and they'll just be like, no, Woody the other way and I'm like the other one. Oh, the other one. I should have thought that I'm going this way and I should have gone the other way. Mind you, there's two 359 other ways I could have gone but I'll just guess I'll guess what you

meant. But I have to guess what you meant about Other way the 30 seconds ago that you saw that I've turned 14 times since then I don't know which one is the other way I did that in Red Dead when I was streaming it but I realized after a bit that it was like I'd be like I'd say verbally like where the fuck do I go from here? And then I would turn around just naturally to look the other way. But before I turned around, a bunch of people are spamming

like other way, other way, other way. And so then I'm like taking incorrect tips because I've already preemptively turned around. And so I just stopped taking hints at that point. I'm like enough people are trying to bother me. I know Kyle wants to go, but I will like, I'll kill everyone. Like, okay, chat, I'm standing still on the stairs.

From here, what's next? And that system works really well, but it does require me to filter the trolls because some of them will be like, by the big tree. I'm not falling for that bait. No, no, no, no, no. That's an end. There are 97 big trees in this.

I'm in a forest. I don't know which one is the big one. No, there, no, no, no. That's a 97 big trees in this. I'm in a forest. I don't know which one is the big one. No, there's one that's distinctly larger. Just look. And then people saying stuff like, Whoa, he doesn't know about the big tree loot box. He doesn't know about the chest at the base of the big tree. We've been, we've been playing Baldur's gate and, uh, we, you're in a party of four that needs to stick really close together so that, you know, if I talked to somebody, you hear it and, uh, and scum controls, you're not using discord. It's like an in game mechanic. It's an in game mechanic. There's like,

every time you interact with like a new vendor or you talk to some one-eyed kid on the street, she's like, hello, sir. And then like vendor or you talk to some one-eyed kid on the street She's like hello, sir and then like we cut to a little talking with her and choosing options dialogue screen, but anyway like Scum got lost last night and I'm just one room away from him and he's spinning his camera around and around and I'm like to Your left he goes spin spin spin spin. I'm like, well every direction is left now every now like That game is left now. That game's been fun. We've been playing.

It reminds me of The Simpsons where Homer's like, the TV goes out and Homer's like, we're just going to do a fun family game. And he gets a Rubik's Cube out. And they're all trying to tell him, like, laugh, dad, laugh. And Mart's like, top-wise, turn it top-wise, Omar. He's like, ah, fuck and parts like top wise, turn it top wise. He's like, fuck, I remember why I threw this away. Just never be unhelpful. Yeah.

You've never been a Rubik's cube. No, if you look up online, they have like just a super easy guide, but it was one of those things that once I realized it was like, Oh, it's just following these steps. Well, this isn't very fun. This is kind of lost. It's magic. But it was one of those things that once I realized it was like, oh, it's just following these steps Well, this isn't very fun This is it kind of lost its magic. I liked to imagine just like Untold genius flying around people seeing, you know geometric shapes and whatnot But really they're like and two down here and one up and then two left to move this square up one and it's like, okay Not not the most accelerating thing.

Did you do them, Woody? As a kid, I've beaten Rubik's cubes through brute force. I was never fast or good, but I've done it. And then as an adult, you know, it's the, your kid is like, dad, can you fix this? So I go to online and at first you just follow the algorithm and then towards the end, if I remember, there was some like decisions, like, if it looks like this, follow this tree, if it looks like that, follow the algorithm. And then towards the end, if I remember, there were some like decisions, like if it looks like this, follow this tree.

If it looks like that, follow that tree. So I used instructions as an adult. That's, I'm not the guy. So Kyle, you're getting a little tired of scums, lack of directional sense. I think we're sorted out now. We played like 25, 30 hours this week and over the course of three days.

It's so, it's insane. Like nonstop. Anytime I turn this PC on, you know, Discord starts up and it's like FPS Kyle is streaming Baldur's Gate 3 and it doesn't matter if it's six a.m. or midnight. It's you know, you could set your clock by. I guess you can't. You can do anything but that. You're probably saying more.

No, I. I could set utilities you can do anything but that. You're probably saying more. No, I. Utilities to it if it's working. Kyle has the schedule of someone who hates sunlight. Like who sees the sun is like, yeah, item D not for me. It's not quite that now. I'm, I'm, I'm waking up, you know, in the morning and going to sleep around midnight

or two or three in the morning or something like that. I just play all day. So over the years, you and I've done this too, have been like, you know what, I fixed my sleep schedule. When in reality it's not fixed, it just drifted to normal for now. Which one of those is it? Well, I'm not trying to fix it is the thing, right?

I'm just living life. So- I'm not judging. So I would say right now it's such that I am awake all during the day and asleep during most of the night. Wow. Like a normal human more or less. That's great.

So you're eating meals at normal times? Eh, you know. Don't get carried away. I have been brought to me right here where I'm sitting so that I can continue to. Are you letting the door dash driver in now? It's like I leave in the doors open, head up the stairs and make a left. I need you to clap while you leave so I know you're not stealing anything It's interesting co-op like it's the type of game where a single player obviously you can play for an hour at a time and touch and go and come back but you know since we're doing it co-op you want to sit down and kind of get going you don't want to if he's made time I want to make time so we played all the way through at one and if anybody who's played the game knows that's that's a long way we

did everything we didn't miss a single quest I don't think so I have a question so I've never played Baldur's Gate, but it's my understanding that you choose the bard, for example, and then you kind of follow, the story you get is dependent on that class you chose and the decisions you make are limited by classes. When it's co-op, whose story is it that you're following? Is there a primary person and the co-op's just tagging along or is he have an equal experience?

Everybody has an equal experience because when you're playing the game well the idea of a main character and and and the members of your party is a little confusing but There when I'm playing by myself There are four characters that I'm playing as all the time. It might not be the same four, but they all have their own stories within the game. What I traditionally do is play as just four all the way through and I get their entire story from beginning to end. But to answer your question a little better, I guess what we're doing is whenever we go

to the vampire castle, we play as the vampire. And whenever we go to the Githyanki castle, we make sure that the Githyanki characters with us. If we go down in act two, we're gonna bring Halston who can cure the shadow lands. So it's a big story that involves a lot of characters and you play through their points of view and you also kind of stand over their shoulders sometime, but you experience the whole story.

You just get more flavor and more options. Uh, if you are in control of one of the characters who's, um, you know, being affected by the story. Ah, how scum enjoying it. He's having a good time. He's, he's got a, he's got a Kung Fu monk he's playing as. It's like, he's like a old black lizard man That's cooler than your dwarf thing

Whatever you are a goblin a half. Um, I'm playing as now I'm playing is like a like a no Now I'm a drowler. I'm a dark elf So like every every time we meet up with a goblin or something instead of having to negotiate with them and convince them that they should let me by, they're like, oh, sorry sir, didn't see you there. Please, right this way. Do you like a snack? We have great snacks. They just kiss me.

Everybody's just so afraid of me and they're just kissing my ass and terrified. It's fun. That does sound fun. In my gaming news, I've been watching, I've been enjoying the intra-Asian racism on Age of Empires 2 text chat. There's so many, like, I only play team games now and I'm doing, like, I'll sign up for

like a random 4v4. And so the people on my team, I'm not going to know, the people on their team, I'm not going to know. And a lot of Asian people play this game. They like RTS is just bigger over there. And so like, it's very common to see a bunch of Chinese characters, which I've figured out are the slightly straighter shaped Chinese looking letter because like they all like whether it's Thai or Vietnamese or Chinese or Japanese, they all look similar enough to me. And it

unlike Call of Duty, it's actually really rude to like if the three of us were on a team and we joined up to the 3v3 queue and then immediately one of the other team like leaves, it's not call of duty. They're not going to put somebody else in that spot. They basically made it's like, all right, well, there's no point in playing the rest of the game because we're going to have more population than you. We have three people. You have two. This is a waste of time. Now we all have to leave and we all have to re-enter the queue. And so it it's like a really it's just rude to be in a game early and leave and the other team had Chinese characters on it It was like a four v four and then one of the other guys had I guess tai or vietnamese because they were like more squiggly

Queue, you know, whirly-durly characters and Immediately in the beginning of the game, the Chinese guy resigns, leaves. And then like the other whirly-durly Asian guy was like, everyone report this Chinese dog. That is so like a Chinese guy to just leave right in the mirror.

And it's just like, they, cause they're not like, America, we're the least racist country ever. Oh, yeah, it's drilled in you nonstop, like slavery, Holocaust, like be nice and whatnot. And so to the rest of the world doesn't have that like, like Asia, certainly not. And so I guess Europe has the Holocaust ship, but like, you know, the slavery Holocaust stuff, they get a different drilled into us as kids. But like these these intra Asian fights, they'll just be like, they'll bring up stuff from like thousands of years ago. Like, you're just upset because we rape and then King. He's propaganda.

We invent the wheel. You invent the oval. Yeah. But I just laughed at that because I just picture like an angry Vietnamese guy playing on like a PC from 2002 being like everyone report this Chinese dog. That's clearly an insulting thing over there. When to us calling someone a dog is just not that it doesn't have the punchiness to it, but it must be very insulting. I guess it is

insulting. They eat dogs. So this guy seems to be eaten is what they're saying. That doesn't track, like if you called me an American cow, I wouldn't be like, ooh, we eat those. That's true, you know it meant fat though. Chicken though. Yeah, you're a chicken. That's a different thing. What about pig?

A pig. You're a pig. You know, I guess just calling people animals in general is bad, but dog is our favorite animal. It doesn't sting. Yeah. Oh, look at you all loyal and- Right?

Loyal and adorable. I think the descriptor Chinese was where most of the hatred was from that Thai guy. We've never met a Chinese dog. That's the thing. Maybe in China, the dogs are terrible. I heard they're racist. they hate the other breeds. Oh really? No man. Is it the Akita? What's the main China breed? Would it be an Akita?

No the Akita is a Japanese one. Oh you're right. I think you're right. Yeah yeah. I don't think Chinese is Chinese culture big on pet dogs or no? I Have a list the pug the chow chow the chow chow area the Tibetan spaniel and the shit sue The shit. So yeah, the chow chow is the main one that'd be their go-to I guess they were gonna have a dog those things are purple tongues. I think right or blue tongues rather Is that the sharp pay that has that I think it's chow chow or blue tongues rather. Is that the Sharpe that has that? I think it's a Chow Chow. Okay. But I was just watching the dog show the other day. I never missed the dog show. I sit there and watch with my dogs and I'm like, here they come. Here's your role model. And then like the head Pomeranian comes out and I'm like, he must be like your president. Pay attention.

residents, like pay attention. I've never watched one of those dog shows. Is the state of the union tomorrow? It's not called the state of the union in the first year, but congressional address. Yeah. But I believe it's tonight at 8 PM. I saw a thing on YouTube that said a congressional address live upcoming 8 PM, but I didn't actually look at the date. I just assumed that it wouldn't be a day earlier that it'd be tonight But maybe it is I'm interesting to see interested to see what he may say because it's been a wild week

I was watching his blow up with Zelensky live. I was up that morning It must have been like 1030 or 1130 a.m. or something. And I'm like, oh, sweet. Get to see this thing live. So see what Zelensky is up to. This will be good. Strong face. Solidarity. Oh, great. How did you know that Dino T.S. signed? You called it the day before it happened on PKA. Well, I think that deal is outrageous. I think that deal is outrageous if you're Ukrainian. Now to me, I like the idea of Trump taking $500 billion of someone's... Metals.

Metals. He keeps saying rare earth minerals, but I keep hearing him talk about fucking iron. But in any case, I like like that idea because that's we're definitely, we would definitely get the better of that deal. I'm sure we'd go in there. We'd strip mine his shit and leave an environmental disaster is what would happen. Like, like we wouldn't give a damn about how we got it. We just get it. But I knew he wasn't going to sign that. I, he just wasn't the, it, I couldn't imagine him signing it. Like he'll sign something,

but he's gonna want security assurances. Not some like, not some three year promise from somebody like, oh yeah, we'll watch after you. Like he's gonna want security assurances. You guys follow it closer than me. I thought like the whole reason it was a big deal meeting is that like behind closed doors, they seemed like, oh oh he's coming, he's coming to sign the thing. So what it that's what I thought too because that's what I saw on TV that they had. That's what the Trump administration said

and if you're about to have that'd be like we're about to have a meeting. I'm sorry. They had reported that they had altered the terms of the deal to something they could both agree to and Zelinsky was coming to sign it. And then I saw reporting on the deal based on what they did see that like oh, this is a little bit more of a win-win. This is going to be cool. And then Kyle was like there's no way they sign it and i'm like, I don't know but okay. Kyle was right that they didn't sign the revised deal. To me, it looked like a setup. Like it looked like

they never, they brought Zelinsky there. They put them in that room. They invited the Russian press, by the way. And then they had like a 13 v one where they berated him over not saying thank you not wearing a suit and other things. I heard the first 40 minutes was cordial. Is that right? Well, the question was a reporter, right? Heck of I know, but it was a hostile reporter, right? Like it was definitely a guy who was MAGA,

who was hazing him for not dressing appropriately. Okay. Yeah, I don't really give a shit how he dresses, but I, and I didn't watch the whole thing because it was like 50 minutes, but I did see people saying like, the last 10 minutes is going viral, but the first 40 minutes was apparently pretty cordial like normal boilerplate like uh discussion is that not true? I don't remember there being 50 minutes of them sitting

in front of that fireplace. I think it was pretty long. I remember there was a before meeting where they were in like the Roosevelt room or something like that and I'm sure they went on and on. But then in front of the cameras was up to it was way too long. I was sitting there cringing. I thought they were going to physically harm one another like Trump and Zelensky were getting so animated and they kept touching one another. And I was I was afraid that like Trump was going to touch him too much and he was going to like recoil and the Secret Service is going to grab Zelensky. I did what is with the crazy Zelensky's English?

Why is he not better at that yet? How was your Ukrainian? I don't need to speak Ukrainian because that's not the global language of finance and diplomacy. I think it's excellent. And it's been getting better as we go. I did like that. I saw one thing where he's like Mr.

Trump, I am really serious. Like he did the Eastern European like weary. And I was like, yeah, that's how you can tell he's a legit one. He's from he's from the Ukraine for real. Yeah. I didn't think it was an ambush because Trump was surprised by the way things were going, he's like, I think it's going to make good TV and everything. But I mean, we'll keep going.

And I want to keep going so that people see that like, do you wanna do business with this guy? And why was that? Why was the Russian press there if it was like spontaneous? I don't know. Who was there? Which? The Russian press.

Well, it wasn't spontaneous, it was a big planned meeting and everything. You know what has me, I can tell you the concessions they want from Ukraine, right? There's not gonna be anyone there to keep you secure after they leave. They have to give up the minerals. You have to give up all the land that Russia has currently and some land that Russia has declared to be their own, but they're not currently occupying. You have to lose Crimea and you can't join NATO. The concessions they're

asking from Russia, take a break from war? Like it's seemingly, like you could describe it as a temporary ceasefire, but nothing stops you from going back for the third time. What option does he have? I'm saying they're asking Ukraine to make all the concessions and they're asking Russia to make zero. So that United States very much

works on Russia's side. Russia has the power right now. Well, the thing is that, I mean, Russia has the power right now. Well, the thing is that, I mean, the US had the power against Afghanistan. Russia had the power against Afghanistan. US had the power against Vietnam. All of those things. The little guy was able to kick people out of their own land. It's hard to take over someone's land, it would seem.

Those are different things, though, like they were that Ukraine's at the peace table for a reason. They want peace. I think they're in big trouble. Trump's going to, he doesn't want this thing to continue. He wants to be the peacemaker. He wants to prove that the only reason it's been going on this long is because Biden was incompetent and he's not.

So he wants peace by any means. He doesn't care if they get security assurances or not. And Zelensky is going to be backed into a corner with this thing. I hope the result is that Europe actually does what it's been saying the last week and they pay for the fucking war. Like they're having a meltdown over there. Oh, America's this and America's that. It's like, no, you're just mad because we won't pay for the war anymore. You pay for it. You pay for it.

They might. And I wonder, like, do we really want that? Right? Because the last 80 years have been pretty good. Right. America sure has been financing kind of global peace, but we've had a lot of global peace. Now we're trading in Europe, Canada, and Mexico as allies in exchange for Russia and North Korea. Right. Those are our new allies. Those are the people who line up. Trump's values a little more, right?

LGBT stuff, Trump fucking hates it. He'd be very popular in Russia. That's something they like too. I don't think Trump cares about gay stuff. But what I'm saying is, Trump sort of aligns with values in Russia more so than the values in France. And I'm trying to make sense of why we're like talking about leaving NATO and ditching our traditional allies and taking Russia's side in this war. I don't think that our new allies are like North Korea and stuff. I think like our strongest allies are still the United Kingdom, France, Germany, Australia. Like the reason these are big stuff,

like if we were truly no longer allies with them, we wouldn't give a shit their perception on any of this, but we still do. Like we want to be on the side. Like we are the Western world, like, and we've funded it for many years. And so hopefully the whole Trump thing, like actually does get Italy and Germany and France and all of them to be like, Oh, this big daddy over the sea isn't going to finance all of our security anymore. We're going to have to re-up our manufacturing of guns and bullets and we're going to have to train more guys and we're going to have to take care of Europe because it's kind of silly to be like 80 years after World War II, be like, oh, the Russian men is rising again. Who's going to be the one who has to deal with it in Western Europe?

America and the other thing like we spent that all that time. We spent all the last 50 years or whatever, ready to defend them at the drop of a hat. And they got to spend that last 50 years doing whatever they wanted with that money. You know, and they didn't have to invest in their military the same way. It'll be interesting to see where this goes. Like, for example, Australia just bought US subs, right, fairly recently.

Yeah, that was a deal. But you know that US isn't particularly loyal to their allies anymore. Like if I was Australia, I might be wishing I bought French subs because- What allies? I mean, we're incredibly loyal. We've been paying for the Ukraine War for-

We just implemented 25% tariffs on Mexico and Canada, right? They're bullying us. I mean, that's not part of... I don't see the tariff thing as like being mean to allies unless you consider all of Western Europe tariffing us over the past century, you know, equal, because Mexico tariffs us, Canada tariffs us,

Sweden tariffs us, France tariffs us. I mean, Mexico and Canada are part of what used to be called NAFTA. I forgot the new name. What is it now called? I don't know what the new one is. I don't know what they're renamed. Oh yeah, Trump renegotiated it, which is hilarious because he slams it all the time as if he didn't renegotiate it. He does all sorts of stupid stuff, but like I don't see tariffs protecting your own nation's manufacturing corps, whatever you want to call it, but like I don't see tariffs protecting your own nation's manufacturing core, whatever you want to call it as like an enemy thing like Our allies tariff on Canada says they're not gonna send us electricity anymore

That's a lot of things. I'm way less. We have we have the the cards like in regard to every little tariff battle because one third of the global consumer market is America. I think a lot of people hear that and they don't really fully internalize how fucking insane that is. You cannot be a country on the border of us and just be like, you're hitting us with tariffs, we're hitting you back. It's like, no, no, you depend on us infinitely more than we depend on you. You can't win an attrition battle with tariffs against the US, you can't. They're saying-

Let's see how it plays out. Like Trudeau says that Trump is trying to crash the Canadian economy and send them into a depression so they're easier to annex. Like I think that says more to the power of American sanctions than anything, if that's what the Canadian Prime Minister has to say. Is he a Prime Minister? It also says something about the strength of our friendship, right? If Trump is calling

in Governor Trudeau and they're saying they're trying to annex our country and there isn't going to be a Canada anymore, and then we're here on the podcast saying that like we're great friends, we're true allies like, I don't know, it doesn't, it feels like there's a realignment happening here. But I just want to throw out one last thing. It is really hard to read Trump. Like most people, if they get upset during Magic the Gathering and flip the table, that game is over.

Right. With Trump, you don't know. You reset the table and he'll be like, All right, let's keep going. He and Lindsey Graham, my cards weren't in their sleeves, bro. Are you kidding? And irreconcilable differences, right? They were giving out each other's phone numbers, personal phone

numbers and shit during the thing. He's ripping on Lindsey Graham. He's ripping on Ted Cruz's wife, he ripped on DeSantis in a bunch of ways, and then they all make up. Right? Like, like battles that you would think you couldn't come back from. He's so transactional, his mind's always open. So if you told me, I in six days, we'll have a deal with Ukraine, I'd say not impossible. It seemed like that door was closed, but closed doors with Trump don't look like, they're not what they seem sometimes. Yeah.

I mean, I think it's gonna work out. Like I don't think there's any actual chance that like us in the UK and Canada and Western Europe don't remain the strongest allies. They rely on us too much not to be allied with us. Just transactionally, to use that term, which I like. They depend on us. They don't have the ability to secure this global hegemony without the US as the backbone. And so I just see it more as like trifling, like fights. I don't know what being their ally gets us. I don't know what being their ally even means.

It means we pay for the wars in Europe forever. Does it mean like sparkly, fun feelings all the time when I think of Germany? Okay, well then we're allies. But if it means subsidizing their military form, then probably not so much. I don't know, especially when like anytime that we have something to say about how they do things, it's we're sticking our foot in their business

or whatever the phrase is. I wish I could answer it. I always wonder like, okay, okay, okay. I get that. Say Israel. Oh, we have soft power in Israel, right? Israel is an ally because we give them all this money and weaponry and such.

Aren't they great to have as an ally? And I'm like, how? It's like having my kid as an ally. And I just pour money into them my entire life. And then if we ever get into a fight, I defend them too. Like that's a terrible analogy. No, no, like there are allies where you don't get, like the whole point of an alliance

is that it's mutually beneficial, right? And so if it gets to a point where it's like, hey, Western Europe, we've kind of been bankrolling this for many years and not only have you not kept up your end of the bargain, but we asked so little that it's like if Kyle let me live at his house and we called that a quote alliance and all he asked of me, no rent, no utilities, no food bill was that I mow his yard. And that after maybe eight months of living there,

I start mowing a third of the yard. Then I start mowing a quarter of it. And then I stopped mowing it entirely. And when Kyle comes at me to be like, you need to mow the lawn, I'm like, wow, sticking your nose in my business while I'm trying to jack off on your desktop. I'm gooning in your guest room and you're pounding

on the door about the fucking backyard. Okay? Why does it matter if I cut the back? I'm kind of on team Taylor for this if I'm honest. You're like demanding that I mow the grass and I'm coming like democracy is it dies in darkness. Do you remember that? They lost a vote until they said democracy died. That was so embarrassing. I remember the phrase all the time, but I don't remember it being a response to something specific. Oh man, the sky is falling. The sky is falling.

Yeah, it was histrionic. The Washington Post had that as their header for a while. And it's like, how does no one see that? And they're like, hey, outside of our little four walls here in DC, this is really embarrassing. Can we take this off our site? Is that what you want above a site reading about like what dog won the show? Some non political article about like a fun beagle. We'll see. The thing with Zelensky didn't go bad until Zelensky like, and maybe it was the English,

but Zelensky's like, you have nice ocean, but, and you're not feeling it now, but you will feel it and it's like whoa Well, we're gonna feel from across the ocean, right? What are you even saying? What are you thinking right now? Yeah, what do you what are you saying right now? This thing you could say you know, I I thought there was more words to it But I'm not sure enough to call Kyle wrong. I might be the wrong one but it was something like you know when they get to Poland and then you start having American soldiers defending a NATO country through what is it Article 5 that's that's when you'll feel it it's better for us to stop it in Ukraine but he didn't say all that but he said some of that yeah I hear any of that I heard you

have nice ocean, but, and you don't feel it now, but you will feel it. And then Trump is like, whoa, whoa, you don't tell us what, you don't come here and tell us what we're going to feel. You don't get to dictate to us what we're going to feel or how we think about anything. And then that's when JD Vance went in on him and started like, you know what,

you haven't said thank you recently. I want to thank you right now? The fat-faced JD Vance edits Thank you, mr. Zansky, can you pull that up Zach? I was laughing so much. That's mad man. That's mad man. Dude, they're giving him a hard time. He's uh...

Dude, right and left, everyone agrees that those baby face edits of Vance are so funny. Those are great. I love him. I hope he embraces it. I hope he embraces it. I hope he embraces it. And that would be a good move because he advanced 20. If I win the look 2028, but when I shave the beard, come on.

Oh, thank you, Mr. Zansky. What is it him with no beard are going around now too. It's just a way to make him. I've seen some like pictures of him that are so changed that I saw one guy being like this is like a feces ship

of a meme where like there's not even an original part of JT Vance in the picture anymore. It's all bit slowly replaced into funny. Yeah, the eyes are wide. It looks like they think they do to your photo sometimes when they turn you into a hammerhead shark. Taylor, a question you're uniquely good at. Do you know how to spell Zelinsky?

I keep seeing two spellings and I don't know if they're both right or what. Basically, one or two Ys. I thought it would be Z-E-L-E-N-S-K-Y. Okay, so I saw Trump write his name with double Ys at the end. And it was a, whatever a truth is a truth. And he spelled it that way four times,

meaning it wasn't a typo. And I was like, is this some kind of insult? So I looked into it and other people, respectable people like Associated Press, Reuters, whatever, were using the double Y. But then I see the single Y used half the time. Heck, here's one on, I was looking up the thing about what Zelinsky said, trying to get the quote right.

There's two Ys in this. There is any consistent spelling to his name. I don't understand. That's weird, but it could be like, because that's already like an anglicized version with like, you know, so I got the answer if you want. Oh, fire away. It's just the sound of his name,

the last name ending doesn't have direct English equivalent. So there are multiple ways how you can write it. His foreign passport says Zelensky with two Y's, but even that's not compliant with the current Ukrainian to English name translation rules. He probably has a passport with both standardization, before standardization. The answer is just so.

So kind of both work, but one is more current? No, both work. It like, he doesn't write English, so he wouldn't be able to give you an answer. You know what I mean? It's that. That's the real answer. He's like, do you spell your I with name with one Y or two? And he's like, what's your Y? I spell it with a backwards R. I don't know. No, it should be in all caps with that goofy you with an oomlaut over it. He just says, please, sir, can I have some more?

I say, no, but the whys, the whys. I'm curious about the whys. Yeah, like I said, I saw Trump spell it with the double Y four times in one truth. And I was like, that seems wrong. Fox News uses, I think double Y, so does MSNBC, and CNN uses one Y. NPR seems to use double Y, I don't know.

I like the one Y. It's like you're already making it English, just make it English. Your first name is Polodimir, you're already foreign enough. Yeah, Polodimir. It's like we'll get to name others. Yeah, double Y, double Y like brand names.

Think about how Lord of the Rings that is, you know, everybody's always complaining about Sauron and Saruman. And I like, dude, one of these guys name is Vladimir and the other's name is Vlodimir. Yeah. In another lifetime, we could have been friend. In the future, when when they learn about World War Three and how it began, like they won't they'll believe it was a mistranslation or something. We think we really just lost the leader of the Western powers.

We don't know. His name was lost to history. So we call him Volodimir. Why does it sound like Voladimir? Yes, it's just it's been a thousand years. We just forgot. It doesn't even make sense. I hope the thing cools down but

i don't know what i wonder what what's in putin's head like is he is he like does he want to end this thing soon does he not care what like i would love to know what he actually thinks because i don't think anyone does i bet he wants to end it much more than he's going to let on in public to end it much more than he's going to let on in public. Because it's just a, it's just a, if nothing else, it's a huge expense in arms and manpower that they're investing when it seems like, like they, they've acquired those two regions militaristically that they want to keep. And so like, but I could see him like doing his Russian press being like, we will continue for as long as it takes. Russia is strong, robust manufacturing. But I bet in his head he's like, huh, come on,

let's wrap this up. Do you see that guy, another Russian politician fell out a window. It was a friend of Chael Sonnen's, I guess. Wasn't that giant guy, was it? I like it. It was. Probably not the one you know of. It's a former Russian wrestler that Chael Sonnen knew about and he's like the rush he tweeted. He's like sad news today, like whatever that guy's Russian name is, was like we're let be like, but we're led to believe he fell out of a window of his own house while cleaning a house where he has made. Ah, I mean, those Russians are a clumsy bunch. It's very clumsy.

Drank a bunch of vodka. He had become political apparently, and they threw him out a window. That's what they do in Russia. It's so hard to throw. They probably had that giant Russian politician do it. That former pro boxer. we've seen pictures of that crow Magnin or a Neanderthal guy like they probably just had him do it wait what's his name the former pro boxer looks like a monster he must have

that pituitary thing he looks like Bigfoot Silva like he's weird-looking okay he's got a crazy brow like see Alexny. No, that's not it. No, that's not a giant one. Nikolai value of Valwev Nikolai Valwev boxing record 50 and two high seven foot weight. Maybe he had that removed. It is weighted on there, but yeah, this is the this is the guy that they had toss him out of there. Damn just just an ancient skull. That guy walks in the room.

I'm jumping out the window like. Why are we going to let him rough me up first? Let's get it over with. That's some solid back hair. That is that it's look at that. Those two fight each other? That's not fair. What the fuck?

So Taylor, which of those two physiques would you rather have? Oh, the, do I, wait, if I pick the, can I pick the giant guy, do I get to be seven feet tall or just the physique? The only thing you can change is the skin tone if you want. Oh, okay. If I stay at my height,

I'm obviously taking the shredded guy on the right. But if I steal into the seven foot guy's height, I'll take his physique plus the height. But no height addition. I think the short guy's six five, no? He's gotta be big, like, cause the other guy's's seven feet tall and so he's only a head shorter. Oh That looks exactly like the same person looks exactly like that whack pack member you like Kyle Forehead oh

Person perhaps. Yeah It's hard for me to say I'd rather be the guy on the right now, but he had a much more aesthetic physique. What a fucking monster. Like what's the reason for the bruiser ripped off the British challenges testicles? Who are the two people that beat him? See that guy on the left, he was never meant to be like talking policy in a suit. The black dude won.

The black dude wanted just a bad moment. won? It's just a bad moment. Okay. That's a really bad moment. Unless maybe he won by DQ because he killed him. It was going to be normal DQ, but then he began to eat his heart. He says, now I have the strength of this. You came in inside me.

I eat his dark heart. Yeah. I bet that what if that guy like wasn't even popular. He's just like, I'd be major politician now. And they're like, well, we don't know. He's like, I'd be major politician now. Oh, I know what the guy was mad about from the wrestler that fell out the the window he apparently the Dagestanis are being sent to the front lines and a disproportionate rate and I think that he was speaking out about that and then he got clumsy a lot that window

I think I heard rural people. This is like two years old information were being sent at a disproportionate rate I wonder if that's similar to Dagestani or you know, yeah I think that I think that I can't remember what how they expressed it but they were saying that the that I don't know I guess Dagestan is a country still but it's part of Russia. I don't even know how that works exactly. I share your confusion. I can't. Because they're not the Soviet Union anymore. But, but, or are they? Um, so I'm not really sure, but I know that, uh, that guy probably didn't clumsy and fall out of his window. I think that's just how they kill people in Russia.

That's how they killed that guy from the whitest kids, you know, here, they threw Trevor Moore out of window, through Trevor Moore, out of wind. How else would they do it? I heard it was drugs. He was familiar with his balcony and I didn't hear it was drugs. His friends said it was because he was trying to suck his own dick and he died. But I think it was because he must have been on to some. He must have been on to the funniest sketch of all time. And then big funny SNL had to send agents to shut it down because they're like, no,

if good comedy sketch shows come on TV No one will watch our hogwash anymore. So we got to kill Trevor Moore I saw Shane Gillis was on SNL this week or maybe it was last week. I keep I've been watching I saw his monologues from it. I haven't yet. Was it good? It was good. Yeah, it wasn't like Shane Gillis monologues are Deceiving almost. He almost acts like he's bombing, but I'm laughing at it.

He's like, yeah, I had a question. Everyone asked their girlfriend at one point, have you ever, with a black guy? And the audience is quiet and he's like, right? And I'm finding it hilarious and he's kind of bombing on stage and he's acting like he's bombing on stage, but I think internally

he knows this is funny. Yeah, and if you watch it the very Andy circles around again and like ask the same thing to another. It's good he did. But anyway, yeah, it was super funny, but you could watch it and think that it didn a... But anyway, yeah, it was super funny, but you could watch it and think that it didn't go well,

but I thought it was funny. You'll tell me what you think. Wasn't that one of his bits from his standup special? He reused it on SNL? I've never heard him say that before. Not exactly. I thought it, cause he had a bit about how like, one of his ex-girlfriends dated a Navy SEAL and so

he was like there is no possible way to follow that like a scarred up jacked Navy SEAL hero. Yeah, that's the beautiful dog special. Now I'm wondering if I'm wrong I'm trying to look it up. No you're right it's exactly everybody's right. Maybe he made him use it again. That's not uncommon. It's a different joke. It's completely different joke. It led into that though. Uh-uh. I'm pretty sure on the beautiful dog special, regardless, regardless,

I think it led into him calling Navy SEALs, pussies and saying that the ISIS guys and the flip flops were the real heroes. They were brave. That was very funny. And he identifies don't have their shit together. Oh no, that's me. Meanwhile, like you look at our guys, there's some stone cold guy in a helicopter just murdering 30 journalists. He just gets terminated. Just doesn't even feel it like a machine. I can't identify with that guy at all. Yeah. Well, he's like the in vogue comedian right now.

He's doing very well. So I don't know who else is even big right now. That's not like a brilliant. At talking about politics without alienating either side. If I had to guess, I'd say that in his heart of hearts, he's a little pro-maga, but you know, he just like puts it out there and lets it float by himself.

He never like really takes a side and it's brilliant because he doesn't lose anybody either. If you listen to his old, because like I've listened to a lot more of his podcast clips than I have his standup. And like, especially his older podcast clips. He's very much he's always talking about how much he's like, oh, Trump daddy coming back, baby.

He's like, he's like a big Trump guy there. He was at the inauguration. He was a guest. Yeah. Right. But, you know, it's crazy that part of his career, he's got to play the game a bit. You can tell that whoever puts Trump's guest list together, like they got the billionaires down because those guys all pay a million dollars to be there. But like with a traditional inauguration, there's definitely somebody who's who's so knowledgeable about, oh, it's like

putting a wedding. It's like when you're putting the seating together for a big wedding, it's the version of that. But for all of Washington and those candidates in particular and they put together this perfect No, Joe Rogan was at the church Joe Rogan was at the church before you they go to like it's like the most Private like just friends and family kind of thing. Like I'm sure there's a there's a thing like that with weddings, right? Where's like, oh, yeah We're gonna do just the friends and family here at the this ceremony and then we have the party after

It's just 30 of us in the here. And then there are going to be 80 of us here. Like Joe Rogan's in the room with like just friends and family. And you can see the look on his face. He's just like, fuck. Yeah, this is where I sit. Fuck. This is crazy. I can't believe I made people drink cum 20 years ago.

And then after that, it's, you know, when they're actually in the, uh, I can't remember what the place was called when they, where they did the swearing in and that room, Dana white is there next to Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama. And he has the same look on his face. Just like, fuck had I fuck. Yeah. What am I doing? I sit next to Obama and he would say, it just says sit next to Obama on here. Like, it's not even number. What's, uh, Michelle, can am I doing? I sit next to Obama. It even says sit next to Obama on here like Not even number. What's uh, Michelle? Can you get up? What's new with you Barack?

Can I call you Barack? No, okay So you a fight fan not at all well, no, no baseball basketball Soccer foot hog not a sports guy, huh? He's a big basketball guy. Basketball guy here, still burning them Newports? I gotta know. I'd wanna know. I'd wanna know.

I'd be inappropriate. I'm never going to sit next to Hillary Clinton again. I'm gonna get a good whiff of her for sure. I'm leaning in and I wanna know what she smells like. Cause I hear it's bad. I hear it's either sulfur or like baby diapers and maybe a mixture of the two. I imagine it's too much makeup like many other grandmothers. That's my suspicion. No, that's too reasonable. She smells like the blood of the innocents on

little St. James. That's how they stay young. What's that stuff they get from the... Adrenachrome. What's that stuff they get from the... Adrenochrome. Adrenochrome. She's just... It's what they get from the babies they abort. They suck the adrenochrome out so that they get superpowers and they live forever. How much is adrenochrome? Well, first you got to convince...

You got to create a situation where black Americans are extremely likely to abort the children. So then you get the adrenaline. I'm on it. I saw Kanye talking about this the other day. This is all true. Did you see Kanye wearing his swastika gear? I did. He didn't seem that confident in it, which was funny. It's like if you're going to wear a swastika shirt, you better be all about it. If someone asks you about your swastika shirt, you better be like, this is my thing. Ask me anything about it. If someone asks you about your swastika shirt, you better be like, this is my thing. Ask me anything about Hitler and they'll be like, what do you think about this? And you're like, awesome. Like you just keep reaffirming it. But I saw the picture of him and it looked

like Bruce Willis with that sandwich board on him almost where it was like, if you're not going to live your dream with your swastika, why are you one foot out on your shirt thing? I saw a video. It was him maybe taking garbage out or something. He was like walking around in a parking lot. But he had, it's a white tee with an enormous diagonal swastika right on the chest. And it's like... And it's like, I don't know what to think about him. Usually, I think I can look at someone, even a celebrity, and kind of maybe I'm not accurate, but I can make something that makes sense come to mind. I'm like, ah, he must be doing this, that, and the other.

He wants publicity. But this, I think, is legitimate mental illness. And he's just been having a manic breakdown for like a decade now. And we've just been watching. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's reasonable. He does seem to be a very erratic guy. Show that Zach. Like he's just like out in public,

like just chilling with his, he looks lost. You're right. He looks like he's being forced to stand there. You're right. This is much like that Bruce Willis movie where he had the, what was it? A sandwich board or something. I hate ninjas in the city.

Yeah. Oh my gosh, he's doing Nazi salutes too. But look at that. He didn't commit to the sig heil. You're already wearing a swastika shirt. You better do it prim and proper snap those heels. Yeah, he like he did a little sig heil and then he and then he like turned and pointed in the other direction as if to try and hide it and it's like you're wearing a swastika shirt

and it's not even like the kind you'd see on a middle school desk. It's like turned correctly too. Like he looked up and he probably had it the way you like in your memory sometimes you like forget that it's not parallel to like the sides of the flag. But no, he like looked up on Google and he's like, nah, rotate that shit. Yeah, perfect.

Simple shirt design. Like I remember back in 2011, every YouTuber would just put like four words on a spread shirt and start selling tea. That's Kanye, he's still in that stage. Yeah, and the shirt is ill fitting and it looks like he's gained weight. So he's always probably, he's been a little pudgy usually.

Battle of the Bulge has been a constant fight with him. How is he with his wife? They they divorced That's him because of the shirt. Are you sure I thought that was? Like I thought it was like a developing story. I didn't know it already happened I mean if she changed her mind, I don't keep tabs on her But she said she was leaving him because of the not the swastika shirts What's her name Bian Bianca? Bianca Sonsori.

There's no new news on it. Maybe there are. No, it's still just stuff saying it appears imminent. Well, come on. I think she made a statement. She's like, this is all I'm going to take. This is Swastika things, the last straw. Malt.

A representative of the couple denied claims of the split. But I wonder which one he works for. That's Milo Yiannopoulos, who they're referencing. I can't tell if you're joking. No, I'm serious. Yeah. Yeah. Milo. I guess Milo, I think a true thing is that Milo actually did work for Kanye in some capacity, but it's also Milo.

So like take it with a dash of salt as to whether or not they're getting divorced or not. And if he's saying they're not, I don't know. Doesn't seem like I know any more or less than these people write in articles saying that it's imminent. Right. I don't know. I guess seem like I know any more or less than these people write in articles saying that it's imminent. Right. I don't know. I guess we'll find out in time.

Her sister's getting popular now. I think the Sensori's might be the next Kardashians. Ooh. Who's the sister? Dude, she matches Bianca in talent, I would argue. Angelina Sensori. I don't know. Tell me what you think Taylor.

She's not ugly duckling. Let me know. Big fan. See? I mean, I know what the Taylor is telling me privately that she's not hairy enough, but outside of that, that's a banger. Oh yeah.

Outside of her not being, you know, gruff enough for me. Taylor's really like it. Tell me if this sounds like Taylor. Y'all agree. Like she lacks a boyish charm in some way, but outside of that, she's good. I very much like that she has nothing to do with boyish charm, but she's skinny

and she's got nice titties. I don't even know which one she is. Zach did the thing. Is she number two? He did the thing chicks on Tinder do. and she's got nice titties. I don't even know which one she is. Zach did the thing. Is she number two? He did the thing chicks on Tinder do. Where they should be like. I was gonna say that.

They put four fucking girls on there and you're supposed to be not face blind to tell these people apart enough. Your opener should be like, are you two, three or four? Because I'm good. Those are all her sisters? All four of them?

Oh, they're all sisters. Well then I don't know which one I'm talking about. There's like a, okay, well, is it the one second from the left? That looks the most similar to the pictures I'm seeing. Which one, Taylor? The one second from the left, I think, maybe? Okay, I'm gonna rank them,

two, four, three, one. What do you guys think? The one is underaged, almost certainly. In the white? She looks like the mom to me. You just said that four is one. Two, four, three, one is what I said. So I put four as the.

I didn't know she was under. Oh, I see. I misunderstood how you were throwing the numbers out there. Well, I mean, I don't know if she looks very underage to me. Oh, she looks like she's going to learn how to drive this weekend. Yeah. For the for the listeners who don't know, the one on the far right is she looks to be like eight or nine wearing a Dora the Explorer backpack. She's so young they haven't bought her real shoes yet.

Yeah, running around barefoot at the wedding, spilling fucking cups. Yes, she has a sippy cup. I'm trying to find out how old they are. It's not that easy. Let's see. Bianca since or his little sister Angela copies her skimpy outfits. Really copying Angelina. Is that the youngest one?

No, that's the that must be the second. I don't know. I don't know. But it could be could they could be the next Kardashians. They're, uh, they're a pretty family. Now they just all need to whore themselves out. Yep. Let's see. They could be the Italian Kardashians because the Kardashians one is 20.

Now when's that photo from though? I don't know. Earlier today, earlier today, Kyle. Earlier today, do you rascal McGovern's about to kick your door in? Thank God she's 20. I don't think she well. I didn't think she looked at you.

Send these pictures of your poop to Bianca's and Zorie's little sister. Like no, no, you got the wrong guy. What do you have those muffins for? Who are the muffins for Woody? Are you the muffin man? I don't think so. The forest gave me to them.

Stop lying to me. Do you think I'm a fucking fool? I would hate to have Rascal McGovern's breathing down my neck over my day. That would be very stressful. That'd be a good prank to pull on somebody. That picture's less than a year old. Okay, good.

I've seen the one where like, it's not even a prank, it's just an awful thing to do. They just go after some guy in a random shopping mart or something like, this guy's here to meet a child! This guy right! And the guy's like, oh my God, what are you doing to me? Sometimes they run, which makes you look guilty, but what else do you do?

Well, that's just ruining everyone's grocery experience. Yeah, yeah. I'm trying to pick up a rotisserie chicken or some snacks. I don't want to hear a bunch of hooligans screaming that some guy picking out fucking lettuce is a pedophile. That would ruin the vibe. I think we're gonna try to get Rascal McGovern's on the show. I want to talk to him about his greatest capers.

I want to, I want to hear about taking down the, the, the king pin of King pin of doodoo picks and, and, and everything else. I don't know if he was there for the, the pumpkin smashing thing. I don't think that was his crew. He was a different guy. Yeah. Yeah. There's a few of them.

I only know of rascal though. Yeah. I, that's what Vitaly Z does now. I think a bunch of people are doing that now being pedophile hunters. I've said a couple of times, we can probably, uh, we can probably catch us at least one. I think it's, you just throw a little bait out there. You know, you don't need to be a an expert to do this. You don't need a license or anything. No, you can just go out there and futz around.

Do what you want, you know? You can probably high risk though. You you target some guy who's not and who isn't like a retard. Like you're probably going to get sued, right? I made a cute profile of a underage girl and I just hit up Woody in his chat all the time. But I'm telling him to play different games and he gets me. He's mean to me.

Dude, since I mentioned that on PGA, all the time but I'm telling him to play different games and he gets he's mean to me. Since I mentioned that on PKA the people come every one of them thinks that the first one to do it's like a thousand times a day people are like hey what do you want to play Minecraft or they're like all right I get it you just got here and you think you've stumbled upon a banger. here and you think you've stumbled upon a banger. He doesn't know that me and you are at a Discord chat with dozens of all happening. We're over there like changing accounts. 200 new emails. Very mild.

No, I just saw someone shared a clip of you a minute ago with me. That's, um, you, someone asked you if you were a beverage or if you were a soda, what soda would you be? And you seemingly really thought hard about it. Good answer. I'd be a V8. V8? That's not soda. I don't drink soda.

But I was like, a V8 is a complex drink. You get everything in there. If you look at the can while you drink a V8, you taste the celery, you taste those carrots, you taste those tomatoes, the whole thing. And I'm the same guy who's like, oh, heckity heck, I can't believe this is happening. And then 10 seconds later,

I told someone their breath smells like cum, right? V8 is a complex drink, I'm a complex drink. A complex man. I do like, I haven't had a V8 in many years, but I remember I got got by like the V8 fusions for a while in my mid 20s where it was basically just a V8 for people who didn't want to commit to just a Clamato juice. And so it was like, as much sugar as Gator, like as non diet Gatorade, and it would even have Gatoradeade style flavors But I'd be drinking it at work and be like, yeah I'm just a guy who cares about his health and it's like like 38 grams of sugar added or something absurd I'm sure root juice. It was this fruit and vegetable. Yes, I wouldn't go back probably sweetened on top of that We talk about V8. Yeah Yeah, I mean I refuse to believe the it's not good for you

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I refuse to believe V8 is not good for you. The regular V8 probably is good for you. You know, unless, unless RFK has to tell us something about it, you know, but if they're putting, you know, is what's causing the measles outbreaks in Texas. If you told me it was red dye, I'd be like, yeah, it could be. It could be a dude. It seems like,

it seems like they've known that red dye is bad for us for a long time. And then companies like like Doritos are just like, now, fuck them. More of it in more red and it's like Doritos. I bet you know, Frito light Frito light. Yeah. Is that the high level or does it go to like, I don't know these things all wrap up to like, there's like three companies that own all the general mills. Yeah, it's probably general mills or like Con Agra or some gigantic one above that. But like Frito is enormous. Con Agra was the company that we that owned the the chicken company. My dad worked for a long time. Only delays owned by Pepsi. Pepsi is one of those. Pepsi owns a handful of fast food restaurants. They own young brand does that sound right now on the young brand they owned Cfc

Number of that and then like coke the same thing. Yeah, there's this co-bell and Pizza Hut Caves, maybe KFC. Yeah, who would have known that like delicious sugar water would become popular enough to just run entire segments of manufacturing consumer products? I just think we're smart to diversify like that. Cause in my head, things like Pepsi and Coke, they're like cable news, like walking dead, not dead now, but on their way out.

There's gonna be a new fashionable drink that takes his spot. Kyle says, Oh, I don't think so. I think Coke just has the market cornered, like, like, globally, like you can go into some tiny Vietnamese village where they don't have TV and there's going to be a guy sitting on a stump drinking a Coke out of a glass bottle. Like it's everywhere. stump drinking a Coke out of a glass bottle. Like it's everywhere. I wonder if Pepsi is still a, I know you said Fanta was like a wartime Coke thing, but wasn't Pepsi big in the Soviet Union because Coke wouldn't sell there and Pepsi was like, you guys are retarded. There's a hundred million so drinkers over here. My only knowledge about that. I do remember some pictures of like Soviet Russia and somewhat holding a Pepsi in a commercial

or something like that. I don't know about that though. Dr. Pepper's number two's access, but I think it's by a huge margin. I think- It's absurd. I have it in front of me actually. So Coke's market share has been really flat

to low 20s, high teens, like between 17 and 20, for 30 years. Dr. Pepper's 8.3 currently, up from five and a half, 30 years ago. Pepsi's also 8.3, down from 15. Yeah, these are delicious. I think Dr. Pepper's better. It's cherry soda.

No, Diet Pepsi is the best of the diets, but I also drink Diet Coke. Diet Pepsi's not top five. Diet Coke is of the diets, but also drink Diet Coke. Diet Coke is absolutely the worst. And then Diet Pepsi is like two notches above it, but very near the bottom. Like I were making a tier list. Diet Coke is probably a D tier.

F tier is like Sam's brand shit and like Walmart brand, all that stuff. But A tier is the zero sugar brand stuff. Like Dr. Pepper Zero, anything that says zero after the end, it's just better. Even Pepsi Zero, Coke Zero, Sprite Zero, all that stuff. It's a different sweetener, it's better. I can't tell a difference.

I think there's a technique to drinking carbonated beverages that I lost. My swim coaches, apparently drinking carbonated beverages either was rumored to or actually like impacts your body's ability to process oxygen. I don't fucking know. But to a swimmer that's really important. So I stopped drinking carbonated beverages

through all those years and just never really picked it up again. And now if I do, I'm like bad at it. Like the bubbles kind of burn. I'm like burping or something or like, like, what do you guys do? Letting it fizz before a swallow or something. I don't know what you're doing to handle this problem, but I just abstain from carbon. Yeah. You've got to shake it up and then warm it up in a pan. That way you get all that fizz out. I think you're doing something that you don't even

know it. I bet you're just like easily handling this bubble situation where mine that that soda is still popping off inside my belly. I want the popping off. Yeah, I want the bubbles. Like, oh yeah, it rolls over my tongue and then I let it go to the back and I like let my tongue go flat, taste it all and then it all goes down kind of burning a little as it goes. Yeah. And then you can give a silent burp if you have a big, a big burp. Oh, you know what I did the other day? Like I had really bad, I had really bad heartburn and I didn't have any alpha seltzer

and I mixed baking soda and water and I drank like two full spoonfuls of baking soda in the water. I've never burped like that in my life. Every breath I, like I wasn't having to actively like open and burp every time I took a breath and then breathed out. life. Every breath I like I wasn't having to actively like every time I took a breath and then breathed out the when I exhaled, like I would just burp so it was it was like I was like worry.

Because it was like creating new gases in your belly. Yeah, yeah. All that CO2 has been created from the from the I was like worried. Cause it was like creating new gases in your belly. Yeah, yeah. All that CO2 has been created from the acid in the baking soda reaction. So like the room is starting to stink. Like it's like, it's getting actively smelly in here. And I'm like, God, I'm and opened the door. It was gross.

Dude, did you have an idea of how much baking soda you're supposed to do? Or are you like two tablespoons? How much should I use? I had so much... He said two spoons. I could feel the acid right here in the butt, right at my Adam's apple. I could feel the acid there burning. So I got two spoonfuls into a glass, put it in the water maker and like shook it around and just glug, glug, glug, glug, glug.

It was a lot of baking soda, but it fixes heartburns instantly. And I don't know if you have acid reflux, but it's awful, it's awful. My dad has it. What about in, I don't know, gingers for nausea, I guess. Yeah, yeah, you need something to neutralize the acid is baking powder Poison no baking powders

Used in baking so either one of our I didn't mean that sound that way. No, it's okay I mean, I feel like everyone knows this but me so baking powder is different than baking soda. Yeah It's activated in some way. I don't remember. I don't remember exactly my fear fear is that someone would swap them up, but I guess in either case, it's not that bad. Well, you know, you got that can of baking soda, like Arm and Hammer that you put in the fridge for smells. I've got, oh, that's what happened. That's the whole story.

I got a new thing of baking soda because the other day I looked around, no Alka seltzer, only one thing of baking soda, the refrigerator baking soda. But I'm telling you, Taylor, it hurts so bad. This is like 2 in the morning and I'm trying to sleep and when you lie down, the acid starts like coming up even worse. And I feel I'm almost the point where I'm going to make myself vomit to get acid out of me.

There's so much. It's so bad. So I get the baking soda from the fridge and put it in there. And that tasted like every meal that I've had in this house for the last two years. It tasted like two years worth of leftovers. And then I remembered, like this is a Simpsons episode. Like Homer did that one time.

He ate the baking soda out of the refrigerator and like reminisced on all the ghosts of meeting of leftovers gone by. What? Yeah, that was disgusting. That's the worst thing I've ever tasted. I think. Do you often get acid reflux that bad? Yeah. You know, I drink nothing but carbonated sodas and I drink 10 of them a day, probably minimum, plus coffee. I probably have two cups of coffee, which is just it. I think we found the culprit. And I love spicy food. So everything I eat, there's a bottle of Tabasco here on this table. Where I put it. I cleaned up in here yesterday,

but anyway, I've usually got hot sauce on everything. So, you know, I've always got acid reflux. I have to go bananas with bad eating to get acid reflux. Like if I get acid reflux, it's very rare, but it's also like a, like, it's like if I eat a whole pizza by myself and it's like heavy in the tomato sauce, then I might get it a bit falling asleep. But then even that it's not bad. I get it if I skip a meal. It's like my body made the acid that it would have needed for lunch, but I didn't eat lunch and now I'm just like burning up. So yeah, I do that a lot. I go, I was going through a ton of Alka Seltzer,

but then I actually looked at how much it costs. And that's the time I ordered it and it was like $2 per Alka Seltzer or something. It's like eight, it's like $16 for like 10 of them or something. It was ridiculous. I've had people tell me that mixing like, you know, those bottles of apple cider vinegar you see at the grocery store, usually pretty big. I've heard people tell me that if you mix some of that, like, like a small amount into like a glass of water, that it helps

with acid reflux. It doesn't. It makes it worse because you're adding vinegar to your stomach. No, it's because like it's rebalancing it or something. I'm not making this up. I don't know the facts behind it, but I've had people tell me that before. But I don't know. My experience with that is I remember like five years ago, I was, I started taking, I don't know how much apple cider vinegar per day because of some health bullshit I read and every time I took it I was like, oh instant heartburn Oh

Should have drank that shot of acid. So if adding acid makes it work, I wonder if adding milk would make it better Yes, I go to milk it up I have woke up in the middle night with acid reflux And there's no aqua seltzer and just guzzle milk Just try to get something to line the inside of my throat and stomach so it doesn't burn less I think it's basic. Yeah, probably a little but not my like baking soda is baking soda Just it's instant relief. It's it's one of the few things and oh my god as soon as I swallowed better Milk is slightly acidic.

Ooh, not a good sign. I didn't expect that. But way more basic than your stomach. So it'll still, it'll still eat in there. Yeah. You ever see that thing where they take a human tooth and they put it in like soda and watch it, like eat it away.

Propaganda. Oh, Taylor's right, way more basic than your stomach. So it could pull the average up. Yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, you know, stomach acids. Pretty acidic. Yeah.

I know, but I didn't think about it in terms of comparison until Taylor pointed it out. Yeah. All right, that makes sense. I wish we could use our stomach acid as some sort of defense mechanism. I always think that whenever I watch a Discovery Channel thing and they're talking about

the human stomach acid is four times more corrosive than battery acid. I'm like, shit, why can't we spray it at stuff? Like, that would be great if I had like a cut like underneath my chin, I had two little ports and I end like when I'm threatened, I could like, like shoot it into the eyes of my enemies just the tubes could go straight to your stomach. It's already there. They could just that's there that's where evolution is taken and then you have no acid reflux because you could

just be like i gotta go clear out the pipes in my yard i've got to purge my gland sorry be right back do it in your neighbor's yard there's a big dead spot i need so i need i gotta milk my venom sex can you imagine how why like that would be bad for humanity? If like, it's like, oh, you're not going to honor my expired gift card. Just spot to be disputes. Yeah. Oh, one more thing. I know we're over time. Did you see Casey Anthony's back in the news? Casey, let me give you a little reminder. Casey Anthony allegedly murdered her three year old daughter and then got away with it. That was an OJ allegedly though. We know what's up.

That was an OJ scenario. She's like back. She like started a social media like tour and she's started accounts and everything and making videos. Hey guys, Casey Anthony here. Casey Anthony here. Casey Anthony here. Hanging outside of a preschool. I was gonna ask that, I didn't know how to phrase it.

Like, is she hot? I don't know if I wanna see it. She was pretty back in the day, that's why people were like, gosh, she couldn't have done this. She seemingly aged five years. She looks like she aged five instead of 10. She looks great, you know?

I'm not saying I'm gonna settle down with her but hey she didn't kill any adults you could defend yourself against her she killed the kids so she could party more see she improved other one of the right is the before on the left is the after on the left is the after that's her now yeah yeah that's this week and on the right is when was this it's almost a tie Yeah, that's this week. And on the right is, when was this? It's almost a tie, which says, it's just still a positive thing to me. And you know, she's pro-choice.

True. To the extreme. Yeah, she's the most pro-choice. She's up for those 44 month abortions. Yeah, she's down for a fricking six trimester abortion. A 16th trimester or something like that. Holy shit, that was like 17 years ago. The Casey Anthony trial.

Oh, look at Taylor experience aging. This is so weird. Casey Anthony didn't though, did she? Oh my God. I don't like it. I'm like, I should get new boots. These boots are 27 years old, huh? Yeah.

I guess I do. Hang on. When you're getting them, you're like, ah, my last pair. I'll just call my cobbler up. Dude, I've had cobblers repair my boots several times now. That is, they're like, oh, thank God for that Matt guy. No one else is using our service. No one likes to be cobbled anymore.

It's terrible. It's the end of it's an industry. They have heavy duty sewing machines. People don't know this, but you can take anything to a cobbler. You got something like heavy duty vinyl that needs your backpack needs stitching. Take that baby to the cobbler for two and a half dollars, they'll repair it. I swear it's true.

Wow. Two and a half dollars to a cobbler is a fortune. Let me tell you. They take that money, they take it, they pay them in coins. They take that. It is worth it. They bite.

He bites it. Oh, yes, he's out of the way. Cups his hands gingerly to receive his payment. They're dressed like medieval peasants. It's a well-known paramotor thing. Like the harness that you wear, like the fabric part you sit in, it rips if you fuck up.

And you can take it to a cobbler and they have the equipment to sew it back properly. Like, do you have time for this, Mr. Cobbler? This is war. Well, I was planning to kill myself back properly. Like, do you have time for this, Mr. Cobbler? This is war? Well, I was planning to kill myself this afternoon. I was supposed to get to work on your clothes. He's pulling a gun out of his mouth when you walk into the store.

You're a coward and you always have been. Oh, I can help, yes. This is bad. You're a coward and you always have been. Oh, I can help you. Yes. This is bad. Brother's a blacksmith. No, that would be the better career. I think it's dinner time, folks. Yeah.

All right. All right. PKN 550.