Painkiller Already - PKN 573

Episode Date: August 12, 2025

signs. No one steals signs in football. Yes, they do. Michigan did. There was a huge, huge controversy. There's a documentary about it. I'm not convinced. That doesn't mean that the SEC

wasn't cheating, right? You don't think, yeah, no one checks on the SEC. There's no college football police down there. It's only in Michigan where they look into things. No, if there's any cheating, it certainly wasn't what Michigan was doing.

I don't know. You mean it was? So now Michigan's innocent? I agree. I'm glad we finally found a got on the same page. A little bit of middle ground. Oh no.

Kyle's so Maddie froze. Yeah. So I didn't even understand that. Kyle. This is just like a meme I've heard and I'm not that connected to college football. Didn't Alabama and Georgia and the big boys like they were, you know,

giving a lot of money to people for years? but it was just through back channels where so it was like well we're not technically paying them we just we give all of our five-star recruits i don't know i don't know uh about alabama i know i have never heard that at georgia but i have heard in college football in general there's often a lot of like uh boosters or donors who will somehow through back channels sneak a guy like cars and money and such but with the nil thing that's no longer a thing um and it hasn't been for several years now but Michigan was caught stealing signs. And it wasn't like, hey, coach, I noticed something over there.

It was like, all right, you're my sign stealer. It's all you do. All you do here is steal signs. You are part of our secret cheating program, we'll call it, but don't tell people we call it that. They had a cheating program. That is true. I did hear like, and initially the excuse was like,

oh, I'm sorry, we're not allowed to film opponents. practices and it's like well number one no you can't you can't do that number two it's like you were wearing a wig like clearly you knew something you knew something was up I'm sensitive about my hair line it's like you had a fucking Ohio State hat on trying to fool people like what did you think was going on yeah those people are cheaters that is pretty scummy and they let them keep their title they let them keep all those trophies and stuff I don't get it it seems like when you get caught cheating there should be like ramifications Like, like, they should, they should have the equivalent of the, the trophy ceremony, but it's a shame ceremony. Well, I wish we were here for a brighter reason, but we're not. I think the world neat, like, like, they should drag Michigan, like, the coach, the assistant coaches, the cheater program, like all the players. How do you all feel? Do you feel good? Like, it should be a humiliation session before they can enter into the next season of play. Like, you should make that right.

I could, I don't know about punishing the players for Michigan because there's no way. If they knew, if they're, if they're actively part of a cheating program and they know about it, they were probably just like, damn, our coach is on fire with these calls. This is great. We really are a great squad. They like, they steal signs. Did you say it already? I was looking at Georgia's cheating history at Google.

They were filmed. They would, they sent scouts or whatever, you know, position that would be called to film. practices for other teams so then they could see like oh when coach so and so from i don't know who did they play ohio state does this we can anticipate what they're probably going to do next no no no no so there are so yeah it's literally against rules it's cheating i don't know just watching the other team to get in the scouting report saying hey when they line up in this defensive scheme we should use this offensive scheme so when you give that's what football is there There are like three guys giving signs on the field, and like two or three will be fakes.

They're just fucking doing the macarena, and the one guy is the got one guy with the signs. They have guys on their team with binoculars watching because they know which guys giving the real signs. Totally legal. Not according to the rules that you talked about earlier. Which rule? The not cheating rule. I don't think that's a rule. I think you made that up.

In baseball, it's super legal. I love watching the Yankees do it. It's not. It is. It's not. The Astros got in huge trouble for it. It was a whole controversy. It depends how you do it.

I watch this like every day now. John Boy has made videos about it every single day. People stand on second base and they obviously cheat. And they're like what? That's not cheating. They're in the field of play. That's what I'm talking about. They're in the field of play.

They're players. At the guy's hand and saying that looks like a slider. Yeah. And, and, uh, because he can see. Okay. But if you hire a guy, to sit in the stands with a telescope and look at the catcher and record

it every, every game, and then go in the back with a fucking algorithm, decode it. Then you put buzzers under the players uniform so you can buzz them signals at the plate. Up, slider, slider, okay, get ready. And then you have a guy in the

clubhouse hitting a trash can once for fastball, twice per curve. Trash cans, it's the trash can you go to the line it? You could use your hands and do the whole, like, change up, but you can't, you can't use trash cans? I think trash cans should be legal. You can't use the guy in the stands with the telescope and a radio.

That guy has great eyesight and the telescope allegations were not proven. I've seen the telescope. He's got that thing you put the quarters in at Coney Island. Having a buzzer on them, is that real? I feel like he told me that before. That is. Yes, because it was out of Tuba or somebody. Like he's coming around after he hits a home run while cheating.

And they're doing some ceremony where they're trying to rip. his shirt off to like celebrate and he's like no no no he's like signaling i'm fucking wired i'm fucking wired don't don't rip off my shit like i read they rip off his shirt i've never seen that celebration outside of women's soccer i don't know man i'm just telling you what happened astros are huge cheaters mission's huge cheetah sounds to me like we'll never really know unless you watch the documentary woody has injected enough to out for me man i wish the blues would cheat damn it like show you want it the sixers are never accused of cheating that's the benefit of winning 20 games a year yeah or like on the new york jets nobody's

they're just losers are they the is there a team that has like a worse history of losing in any of the four major sports maybe like buffalo bills or new york jet i know the the Jets are the joke one, but that's probably because New York is such a big market. The team worse than who? Like the Jets or the Buffalo Bills, maybe Toronto Maple Leafs The Lions come to mind. I know they've been good recently, but it seems like for

decades, you know what? This sort of thing Chat and GPT would lie about, let's guess. Who's the most consistent losers in the NFL? I would say the Browns have to be way up there. The football team has the worst record

since pick a year. 2015 Let's do the last 10 years 15 10 years Okay well that might ruin the Lions thing I know they've had Jacksonville Jaguars

Oh yeah okay And the Jets were second Okay Jacksonville No wonder they wouldn't take shit Like I feel like I'm not an NFL guy But I never hear about Jacksonville fans Like they changed it to 19 market

I change it to 1990, which is kind of my sports watching personal life. The Browns were the worst, and the Lions were third worst. Yeah, I think of the Browns as the big loser. Like, there was a year maybe, it's been a long time ago now, maybe 15 years, but I think they had like a one-win season. Or maybe it's- The Lions, too. Ooh.

The Lions had like, I want to say three wins in two years, something like that. It was brutal. That's rough. The NBA, according to Grock, which, you know, these engines never just aggregate nonsense. Minnesota Timberwolves, an all-time record of 1,162 and 1,914, a 378 win percentage is the lowest of any team with at least 30 seasons. No championships, no final appearances, and only 12 playoff appearances in 36 years. Jesus, they need a dynasty just to break even. Oh, they didn't have been an incredible.

They need to go plus 800 games. Yeah. Choose his team. Sacramento is also one of those, like, famously struggling teams. I want to say the Sacramento Kings made the playoffs once or twice in 30 years. The Hawks are so bad. No one talks about them here. This is the Falcons?

The Atlanta Hawks, right? Isn't that our basketball team? Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, I just, I don't know why I jumped to the Falcons. You're right. Yeah, that's how little I think about the Hawks that I follow about. Like, I'm here. No one talks about the Hawks.

I never hear anybody mention them or talk about having a fandom of them. I just always imagine they're the worst. Your best player is Trey Young, and they don't seem to want to re-sign him. Like, our best player, anyone else can have them if they want him. It kind of sucks.

But he is the guy, like three or four years ago, Trey Young made me a fan because he was in the playoffs against the New York Knicks and they were roasting him not just the fans but like the organization put together cheers and signs for the fans to execute with about his receding hairline right it was like and the people that got to me that got that was such a big thing it got to me I know yeah and you're not a basketball fan right but New York ripping on Trey young and Trey young draining threes laughing at the chance he handled it like a pro which made the new york fans even

more upset i'm pretty sure trey won and he became like public enemy number one but in kind of a respected like like a laker Celtics thing like he's our most hated guy but i gotta hand it to him you know he played well and he handled it well i hear NBA players on podcast talking about Celtics fans like they're the the Ku Klux Klan they're just like man everywhere is rough but you go into Boston it's like them some racist pieces of shit

I wish that place would burn down like they just hate Boston and hate those Boston fans yeah Boston Celtics fans are known for being extremely racist that's the reputation they've had for decades and decades and decades

and I have to feel like the players are like you do see us too, right? Like, you can't go shouting n-bombs and me not feel like I'm catching strays, but that's what they did. I bet they were easy on magic back in the day with the AIDS. I don't think anyone would make that bet. I heard Carl Malone was the only player who,

I guess, didn't want to play with magic or spoke out openly about not wanting to play with someone who had AIDS or something like that. And then maybe he assaulted, magic in a game like fucked him up oh that's the last thing i would do to someone yeah to keep your distance from that guy

and then and then he uh he impregnated a 13 year old and and uh the lakers signed him carl malone did carl malone play for the lake he definitely impregnated a 13 year but he did that in college when he was 20 before the NBA career i thought that he continued on with his child impregnations

later in life maybe i'm wrong But yeah, I thought L.A. picked him up later in his career, like, oh, two? I think, like, during that, like, championship run, they had Carl Malone on there in the early 2000s. I'm looking. He did. His final season was with the Lakers. I didn't know that. He was over the hill.

He wasn't Carl Malone anymore. It wasn't the, what are they going to be a mailman? Yeah, because he always delivers. And it's funny. There's this great combo. You probably know where I'm headed with this, but he was playing against Michael Jordan. And he's like,

you're up against the mailman, you know? And he's like, yeah, there's no post on Sundays. They were playing on a day in which the mailman doesn't deliver. It was a great comeback. I wouldn't have been as clever about, yeah, but he's a child rapist. That would hit to. You just call it. But meanwhile, like, Michael Jordan isn't even listening to the insult.

he's like having an internal conniction over how much money he's about to lose on this game he can't rig. That's what he would be worried about. I don't say that about the greatest. He didn't rig any games. Nobody's ever accused. I don't think he's ever been accused

of betting on basketball. I thought that was a big thing. It would be a big thing if he had done it. I don't know the details of the accusation. People say he took those years off because he was in some sort of betting trouble. But I have no proof. I say that because I like conspiracy theories.

No, I heard that at the time. Like, you know, they're like, oh, maybe he's left basketball because he has these gambling issues and it's chasing them. It's causing trouble. Is it true? I don't know. I don't think the league would have suspended their biggest star. Like, like, the only thing I could see is sometimes a lot of times in sports, when someone is suspended for PEDs or a scandal, the league will be generous enough to be like, let's call it like a vacation. Or bad back.

Yeah, let's say that you're getting like physical. therapy in the Bahamas and not that you were fixing games or on steroids or whatever the actual reason. Yeah, I've heard those like conspiracies in regard to celebrities where people will be like, oh, so-and-so actress is entering treatment for Lyme disease. We know that's code for rehab or some other such code and literally never looked even beyond that one tweet I saw and but I believe it. Who's the SNL guy? Pete something gets great girls, but he's not that attractive himself. Pete. I know who you're talking about. People make fun of him for his eyes. Yeah, Davidson, Pete Davidson. He has a different, I like the way he does it. He's like, yeah, I'm going

to a mental health facility. You know, I like to go every year or so to get a tune-up. You know what? I'm here for it. Like, I was getting a little down, having some negative thoughts and the side of the check into an insane asylum for a while and I come back out feeling better. I like to do that. That would be good. Maybe he's like a regimented kind of guy who's he's like, you know what? Spring, summer, fall, we go bananas. Every winter though, we return to rehab and we have a nice reset quarter and then we go back out into the world. Yeah. He got all his tattoos removed. Did you hear that? No. No. Is that like a technology that's, 100% there.

You can't even tell they used to have tattoos or is there always a little lingering? A laser it. It's gone. I think they can get it down to nothing, nothing. But along the way, it just gets fainter and there's a really ugly stage along the way. Oh, that's the cream. Sometimes people who want

to get a new tattoo will just have their old one laser to be like half gone and faded and then they can tattoo over it without it really showing through. man that sucks pay thousands of dollars

to get a bunch of retarded tattoos and then pay thousands more to get all of them removed I bet for Pete Davidson the issue was the pain and the problems I feel like I almost see it in the last one you do yeah you kind of see it

I bet if he went again like just suffered one more time it'd get even better I thought the laser thing really just wiped it out I think that's the cream that you apply over time to remove it. I'm pretty sure the laser thing is multiple sessions, too. Yeah, I would imagine so.

Wipe it out in one day. The video I saw, it looked like it was instantly erasing it, like he was in Microsoft Paint. I want to say it comes back, though, like the next three days, and then you keep going to do that process until it doesn't. Maybe. The Bible forbids tattoos, so I avoid them. So true.

I also, I dislike the, like, eighth grade scribbles on a desk style of tattoos you see nowadays more and more where it's like, there was clearly no planning of a greater picture. It was just a bunch of impulse like, you know what? I do want SpongeBob on my elbow. And then, you know, four days later, they're like, oh, well, I guess I kind of had fun at the Orlando Magic game last night. Let's throw a magic logo on. And it just looks slap shot and ridiculous. less and the spacing between it isn't right. Like,

those are the worst kinds of tattoos. I would rather see some of the plan. It is better with a plan, but it's rare that like, like everyone kind of starts small, gets more, goes bigger, et cetera,

et cetera. It's rare that anyone's like, you know what? I want a really great tattoo on my back as my first tattoo. The whole canvas is yours, do something amazing. Instead, they stick something on their shoulders,

something on their other biceps, something on their thigh, and now they don't have a coherent, a coherent plan. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Like we've said before, and I think we're on the same page,

if you're going to get a sleeve tattoo, you can only do one arm. Like that Joe Rogan look of both arms being sleeved, you just look not as good, especially if you're going to be jacked, like Joe, like it depends. It depends on your skin tone.

It depends what you do for a living. Like, you know, like he has darker skin. And I feel like it ends up all looking muddied and washed out. And then his hairy arms add to that too to the point where I'm like really squinting to see what I'm looking at because it just looks like he played in one of those puddles of oil that's all shimmering. I do think that the paler skin is a better starting canvas. I watch

a lot of NBA guys and those guys tied it up quite a bit. And it always looks visually confusing and like from a distance a guy with a lot of scabs on his form and a guy with those tats on his form look pretty similar to me whereas on a really white pale canvas it's a better starting place there's a reason everyone starts drawing on white paper

like they don't grab the black paper and just take their yellow crowns and go wild it's not as good an artistic starting point do you guys remember being in kindergarten and having the big box of crayons and there was a white crayon and you just had like the white construction paper or whatever and I was always thinking like what is this for like oh I know now it's supposed to make colors brighter by giving it a base level of white is that what it does I used it incorrectly I was like oh white paper white crown this is the eraser crown it didn't work at all it didn't work at all that's that's my head way man I haven't drawn with crayons in forever oh me too I'm going to start Yeah, oh, me too.

What he's looking down at his notes. It's all, it's all. It's all. Yeah, yeah. There's a bunch of there's bite marks out of them. That's my drinking paste. Don't touch it. I only eat the green ones.

Did you see the Paramount deal with UFC? Yes. And I was like, oh, no more pay-per-view. I'm very excited. And now it appears that all the bad cards are going on Paramount and all the good cards. are going on pay-per-view, it seems. You've heard this, too?

No, I heard them spell out what Paramount was getting. It looked like they were getting 13 numbered cards a year, and then all of the Fight Night cards, and then four super cards that will be simulcasted to CBS. If there are cards above that, then those would fall under some sort of pay-per-view. umbrella i suppose but 13 cards a year obviously there's 12 months so a little more than one a month would be numbered cards that would be free on paramount plus and then again all the fight night

cards which is seems like every like two a month uh roughly uh maybe a little more and then they did mention again those four super cards every year that they would do simulcasted to cbs which i think is going to help grow the sport the fighters are going to get fucked or there's no way they'll get paid as much. There's no way that they will get a scrap of that. I think 7.7 billion for seven years for the broadcast rights. I think that's a deal. Yeah. Advertising is a terrible model to like make a lot of money, I think. Streaming slightly better, but pay-per-view, like an $80 pay-per-view is worth so much more than the, you know, their little fraction of a paramount subscription, probably. I bet there's less money to go around. But maybe in the long term it grows it. I was thinking

UFC as it is, unless you're pirating it, is a really closed system. How do they pick up new fans? How does anyone watch it? Bars. Okay, bars. But I mean, from my little, you know, me being the center of my universe, I'm like, bars, who goes to bars? And who goes to bars to watch a fight? I don't, if they want to make new fans, they should be. be on TV like football was oh i agree i agree they should be um you should be able to flip the you should be able to flip the channel on and get some level of the ufc to like maybe it's not the which it sounds like what they've what they've worked out yeah like having um every quarter having a big good card on cbs will win fans over and bring new fans in and show them what like

the major leagues of a fighting are because the other the the other the other the other the other fighting organizations don't have the polish UFC has they have a really good production team they do a great job like it's rare that the camera view you have you're just you're like come on i i can't see what's happening give me a better angle it never happens right it's always a great angle right it's always the angle you want like six hour broadcast you wish you had a better angle for no more than 10 seconds yeah if anything i wish they'd purve out a little more on the women like yeah for sure i wish they'd give me some more um some camel to the women were double tops in case one comes off that should be illegal 100% fix that fix that rule right away

mm-hmm the men wear bottoms that should be illegal no more cups they should be all like greased up like GSP which is mandatory for their fights this weekend's the big fight I'm super psyched for Drickus Duplessi versus comzat Chamayov you're gonna watch it in the Patreon hangout that's ours yeah or be in there. Yeah, I'm pretty excited for that. I really hope Drickis gets the win. I hope he's big and strong enough. I saw this stat that in like, it was like seven fights in a row, Chimaeuf has taken his opponent down in under one minute. Like showed how long it took in each fight and it's like 12 seconds, 20 seconds, 14 seconds, three seconds. One guy took 56 seconds for Chamaio

to get him down. I think it was Robert Whitaker. I think it took him like, less than a minute to get Robert Whitaker down. And then he broke his jaw, Taylor. And don't imagine that he, like, hit him and like, oh, my jaw's broke. He grabbed his head and squeezed it until his jaw broke. And Wittaker was going, he was tapping.

Well, then do it quicker. Zach, can we get a picture of his broken jaw? Robert Hiddaker's his name. Dude, it is concerning to see someone's teeth not line up, right? I mean, it's coming from me. I've had some unlined teeth in my day. But like, it's like, oh, my God. I think his jaw broke sort of in the middle of the front.

Does that sound right? I saw the injury. I don't understand it without an x-ray. I just know that he squeezed his jaw broke it and then his teeth didn't look right afterwards. That almost happened to me my first day of training. There is a guy, Ray, really well known for his triangles. He was a purple belt, which is just like so much more skilled than if.

first day noob. And he put me in a triangle and it's by responsibility to tap. But this is like the first time. It was like my first role of my first day. And I'm like trying to not be a bitch about it. And he squeezed harder and harder and harder. And I think I tapped after that. Maybe he told me to. And it was like, you were going to break my head. It's like, yeah, we play with live ammo. You were going to let me break your head. Yeah. Oh, that doesn't show it. That's good. I want to just need a teeth. You can see through this the goblin man that we're talking about in Shimae. Like, look at that guy. God, you know, the mustache in, you lunatic. Oh, look at that. Look at that. What is it are we looking at? Free, free, free floating teeth.

they are they are see you can see the rest of his teeth they're attached to something right i don't know i don't know where they're attached to woody maybe the maybe the gum is torn away he did that by squeezing his head like taylor it doesn't you could let me squeeze your head until tomorrow and i wouldn't accomplish this we could let shemaiah do that and you couldn't do this to me i saw i thought ddp had like a decent shot like his style's hard to prepare for it

But people don't know. DDP has this ambush, like Blitz. They call it the Blitz style. And he's like, all right, all right. So you look at your opponent and you look at what he's about to do. Don't concern yourself with that. You're going to take a hit on your way and that's just fighting. Then you make them pay for it.

And he just does that. He takes a shot and he makes sure that he wins the trade. It's even more than that. He's like, all right, step one, start sprinting at my opponent. Step two. Punch. That was how I did so well in middle school wrestling. It was a sprint at my opponent, hit them with my forearm.

The part about disregarding his defense that was so like alarming or like attention grabbing to me that he was just like, yeah, you got to get hit, but you got to tank that and hit even harder. It was like, oh my gosh. So then I saw him and Shemayev, I think I have the name right, like shaking hands. They saw each other in person from one of the first times and was like, holy shit. Chameh looks like he could put his chin. on top of DDP's head.

I worry that... Shemaya fought at 170. Some people make weight like that, though. How big is the greatest? GST is one, too. GST is like, I'm small. It's like, you are always huge in your thing. He's like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But front to back, I'm very narrow. Like, I'm wide, so I look big, but front to back, I'm very narrow. And I'm like, that's a variable? I didn't even know that was... It is, yeah. In the video, I saw the exact same thing, and they were...

they included a video of him at a at a way in or a face off and of course he turns and you're like yeah you're you're not you're thin not thick like chest to back you're you're you're a smaller man um to my ab's back is he looks like a rower he looks like an olympic rower or something that his back is this gigantic muscular squeezing machine that he has built uh drickus is a big guy The weight class they're fighting at is 185. Do you guys care who wins at all? Or you're just excited for a good fight. It's very important.

It will ruin months of my life. It's quarter. You just don't want the Russian money. It could ruin many future cards because the problem is like if he wins, if Chamey of wins, and this is for the championship, he will now be the champ at 185. He will now be getting a lot of, I will have to see him on my TV. I have to see him on my fight cards.

They'll be kissing his ass. They'll be sucking his dick, and I'll have to be there for it the whole way through, whereas Drickus is like a funny, good-looking, quirky, like, good champion, the guy you want, the guy who's good, he's great on the mic. He's mean. He made Sean Strickland cry. Like, he's a mean. John Strickland has these mental health issues because his father used to beat him as a kid.

And DDP is like, you think your dad gave it to you bad, wait until Saturday. I am going to beat you worse than your father ever. did. And then you know, I think families should be out of bounds. And then everyone talks about how Strickland brought up other people's families in previous fights. Of course. Yeah, so don't want that guy there. No, that's the guy who was like screaming Al-Ahahu Akbar on 9-11 after he won. Like, like, that's the guy who was like wanting to go fight and fight the Israelis. He's like, he's like, he's like, my next fight will either be in the United Arab Emirates or in Palestine. It depends what the Sheikh says.

Here's my take. I'd rather have DDP win for the reasons Kyle pointed out. He's very charismatic. He's funny on the mic. But a big, big thing for me, he's an active champion. So many people are active as a challenger. Then they get the belt and they want to hold it for as long as possible because they make money as champ, not fighting. So they don't risk it.

DDP, this guy fights every six months. I'm here for it. Absolutely. Chima, yeah, thank you. He's an inactive challenger. I feel like he should prove himself through six months of regular fighting for 18 months at least just to get the title shot.

He's missed weight several times. Part of that is because of him, like I said, he used to try to fight at 170 pounds and making that weight cut was a problem. He really messed up a card. I'm going to go into the great details, but he missed weight by eight pounds, and they had to, like, swap opponents. They gave him, him and another guy swapped opponents at the last minute, which is an

unheard of thing. It was a weird occurrence, and it was because he missed his weight by that much trying to make 170, even 185, it seems like it's an issue. And he's also had, he got sick a couple times, like this, he got COVID. COVID was like, he got really bad COVID, when. that happened and I think he's been sick a second time and then I think he's missed weight one or two times like he's

had issues and of course I just despise him. Is there a way for there because I know you in particular Kyle these Russian muzzies you that is your least favorite type of fighter? He's not a Russian muzzy but but yeah you know if there was a very funny

Russian muzzie and he was good on the mic. Would you still be like fuck this guy in his weird no mustache have an ass? I think Kyle's become Kabib fan. Yeah, Kabib's won me over. Kabib has, and it's because, like, for years, I've seen him be consistently just a good person. Like, like, if that means anything anymore, like, he's a good man. Kyle described him as respectful and respectable, and that was so on the nose. Like, he conducts himself in a respectable way, and he pays you all the respect you deserve. Yeah. Yeah, he's like a warrior

monk, like incredibly dedicated, just all about his craft, really doesn't care about any distractions, doesn't care about money. When they ask him questions about, like, philosophical, the philosophies of fighting and stuff, it's always some really poignant, well-thought-out thing, even in his broken English. When they asked him about, they sort of gave him a bait question once at a press conference, like, what do you think about Tony Ferguson's mental issues, you know, going a little cuckoo for Coco Pop's on. He's like, this is not good. Talk about people's mental troubles. If he need help, we help. We should give help. But no, we should not talk about this. No good. No good to

talk about this. It's bad. It's like, I think it was a made-up story. But this guy comes up to Khabib with a camera. And he's like, listen, I need some advice. I'm training M.MA. And Jorge Masfidol stole my girlfriend. And I vowed again. get revenge. He's like, Jorge Mastvedal, stole your girlfriend. You need dog. You are not going to beat up Jorge. You need a dog, maybe German Shepherd. Perhaps even two to four dogs. I like it. I'm here for it. I'm down. First, get a gun. Back to that guy, like it, like cranking The jaw reminded me of a game with Scott Sullivan, who's a MMA guy. He's been on our show a couple

times. He got his black belt and he coaches. And he's like, dude, the amount of times you have to like feel like a daycare guy like coaching at an MMA guru shop or house, whatever they're called where he's like, I have to keep an eye because I know certain like purple or blue belts will see a new guy come in and they'll be like, oh, come on over here. What's your name, Steve? yeah we're gonna roll together today Steve and he's like Scott's like I have to sit there and watch and be like I swear to God if this guy he's cranked his head off

he's cranking his head all right well he's like and I have to step in and be like you know what how about you try that on me yeah let's see what you got let's try it on me and so then I'll give their head a little crank and it's like oh my God that would be so annoying to be an adult having to like walk over and get his

look by his funny finger don't do that no buddies the uh the instructor would be like, all right, all right, we have a new person here. Jacob, Daryl, don't break your toys. Do not break the new people. That would be disconcerting as a new guy.

You see the guy right there? Don't talk to him. He's mean. You know? Some people see new guys as someone to like practice hard to hit moves on. I could never hit a twister, which is like a spinal crank on someone who knew what they were doing. but maybe some like idiot fresh off fort brag or something who thinks he's better than he is perfect

and that i would try new things but other guys would just pull their best moves on new people and yeah that's so rude and like hockey wouldn't like can you imagine what he go into a learn to skate and then you're like oh be careful that's darrell the hip check johnson he comes out here and he practices hip checks on people who are trying to learn how to stop It's like immediately. Immediately someone at the hockey ring could be like, what the fuck is right? No, you're banned, dude. I just saw you hip check that 11-year-old.

You're out. You're banned. I'm putting a picture of you near the hot dog. You said they're learning how to stop, which just painted the picture for me. Just how new they were. Some guy just being a dickhead. It's like, yeah, you're just going to turn people off. This guy's going to like go to work with two missing teeth and be like, you know what?

I actually didn't have fun playing hockey. What are they? They say, pizza, pizza. And this guy, this guy, he's got a stick. See, Daryl, only French fries. That was my favorite part of the office. He didn't keep his head up. Step one, remember to wear pads.

You notice how I'm the only one wearing pads? So, yeah, they get it. Michael takes the whole office to the skating rink. And they're all just sort of, you know, going around in a circle, because it's a skating rink and there's other people there of course Michael has a hockey jersey a helmet and a stick he's out there

and he's like he's got this stick in his hands like he's skating fast and hard out there I didn't catch it and for years I was just like well yeah you know when you're on the ice you get wait a minute why would he have that you look like a lunatic and if I recall the way he was skating

with the stick is the way they explicitly tell you not to when you're new, which is going like this and like pumping up and down where you're going to catch someone in the jaw, like stick on the ice. Keep, keep that stick on the ice, Mr. Scott. At the NHL level, though, they break that rule again, don't they? Maybe if they're trying to get speed to get down the ice, but for the most part, no, they're not going to ever pump with both hands on their stick. They're going to have their hand forward, one hand on the stick, and then, you know, you need to pump forward to get as much speed as you can. man I'm excited for hockey season to start again

dude it is a rough moment for sports right now like all there is is baseball which is not a sport I think there's bad people in it and just stand around baseball sucks WNBA isn't a sport it's raining dicks in the WNBA they've locked up a couple kids apparently a 12 year old got struck with one of the dildos

they don't know what's they don't know if she'll recover that guy's locked up there's been I don't know how many I've lost count it doesn't help that I don't know any of the team's names. So when they're like, ah, this weekend at the San Diego Sparks game, another green dildo hit the court.

Like I look at those courts and I can't tell who's playing or if it's the same footage I've already seen. But it's a bunch. It's like every game almost. It seems like a dildo's hitting the floor. I think the sparks are a team, but I think they're out of L.A. Maybe Zach can correct me.

But, dude, I've been noticing more WNBA players like getting attention than just Caitlin Clark. I don't know. I think it's a growing sport. We'll see. Only on the subreddit that like, like, simps for them. They're all of it. There's a really tall blonde chick. I always see them wanting to sit on their face.

See a lot of that. I see a lot of them like, uh, like fantasizing about her legs. Many highlights posted or no? Um, not of them actually playing, but the one highlight where she like fell on the cameraman's face and like sat on his face. They were just like, oh, got to get that job. dude so that was sophie cuttingham and uh dude she was like really charismatic i think she didn't realize she like sat on his face and then she turned around to see what it was and she's like i can't believe i just sat on the camera guy i like soviet gunningham based on what i know of her she's the one

that um there was a girl who poked katelyn kark in the eye and then sophy cunningham is the one who had played high school football and just like ripped her to the ground and got the revenge later in the game oh good for her then you know if you don't protect your star players in any sport you're just you're just a bad teammate yeah that's baseline and she's pretty like if you google sophy cunningham you'll find somebody pretty i'm seeing yeah oh you looked at it yeah yeah i'm in favor of them that are very hot and they're big like i i i think some dudes for some reason don't like tall women or or like the idea of a taller woman than them they don't hmm i'm not short by any means so like the

idea of a six foot three woman is not intimidating to me six six six like i've talked to some women on like Tinder and such who would be like well I don't want you to be you know weird about this but I'm six three and I'm so all about it's like wow that's cool did you play volleyball or like that's what did you do like do you wear heels when you got to eat with I'm going to date I'm going to put my good look I'm not I don't have my lifts or anything but I do have my boots on all right I you know I'm I'm at least six three in my fancy shoes for sure for sure in my boots I'm six three you got to slip I would have to wear my hookah sneakers they're the closest things I have to lifts and definitely what I'm

wearing if I ever meet you guys again I do have lifts somewhere I uh I bought that lift kit off amazon one time like many years ago and I think it'll there's like different wedges you can throw into your shoe and it's like half an inch one inch and they stack together like they plug into each of the legos if you want like more and more and more until the point where you're just basically in high heels, but in your regular shoe. I feel like you couldn't go that high because how many inches could you go before you're just no longer even in your shoes? If you're in boots, like an inch, oh, if you're in like ankle boots or at least, or, you know, some that comes up your ankle, like some that's higher high rise, you can go up a lot. If you're going to go standing next to Richard Ryan on video, you can't be.

Yeah, he's going to make you look 5'4. Yeah, he's a big dude. Yeah, Harley's another one. Yeah, that's how it is, taking pictures with Harley or with Sam, Sam Hyde. And he is... Who's taller, Harley or Sam? Harley's a little taller than Sam, but Sam is also a guy who's like 6-5 and wears boots and lifts. And so he's enormous.

He's like, yeah, my trick is I go from 6-5 to 6-8 with this one. I wear giant boots with lips and that one. It's like, that's funny. To not even lie about it to be like, yeah, I. I'm wearing lifts because I'm going to be standing next to Harley. And I'm used to being the tallest person in the room. Harley is a giant. Just, yeah, he's really big.

Also, he's not super skinny. I'm not calling him fat, but like a lot of people who were tall, I want to say look like when bignana. I don't know. You guys, probably don't know that name. Yeah, yeah. But they, like, their wrist to their shoulder all stay about the same diameter, but not Harley.

Harley is. No, they're big boys. Ooh, what is this, Kyle? Is this one of those pictures? Yeah, show some of the highlights from the WNBA Circle Jerk

subreddit. This is the place to go for like simping and being silly about WNBA stars. There's lots of dildo coverage here. Lots of,

lots of mean jokes, but also lots of like hot pictures of WNBA players. Yeah, I think one of the, oh my God, there's one where they line up

dildos, actually just sex toys and players as to, how they associate the two but I think that if WNBA players wore sexier outfits the sport

could be more popular There you go that's what they should wear Not all of them are hot Not all of them But a lot of them are hot More so than you might guess

And the outfits they wear The shorts and the like Form hiding jerseys Are awful Donald Trump Jr., as you can see tweeted this out It's Trump on the roof throwing a dildo

at some WNB players. Maybe that's the plan. Maybe that's what he's replacing the Rosegark. Is that real? Yes, he tweeted that out. Trump Jr. did. It's obvious. He didn't really throw a dildo to a Rosegard.

No, thanks. I thought that part was real. Every time I see like, basically a tweet, I'm like, all right, let's confirm that this actually happened. Yeah.

Yeah. That one happened. Occasionally, I don't believe that. He's never been a funny memer. So it makes sense. He'd be, posting slop. Yeah, I saw Trump, like, federalized the D.C. police force, and immediately all of the, I'm hesitant to call them right-wing grifters, because that seems very much like

I'm on one side or another, but that's kind of what they are. Let's just say right-wing talking heads on social media and Fox News and established media and such. Those people all had to quickly go to their own Twitters and delete way back on January 6th when they were like, What do you want him to do? He can't just federalize the D.C. police force. That's against the Constitution. He doesn't have that power. He can't just do, you know, just this, this, remember when Trump blamed Pelosi, and people

bought it. He's like, Pelosi's the reason the National Guard didn't come. We need her approval. That is not true. Yeah, I don't doubt it. And if they're the kind of people who are having to, like, go back through their timeline to scrape it, then they are just grifters. Well, I don't know about the national.

National Guard, but in the federalizing of the DC police force, what he's done is he's made himself another goon squad. And he's also, like, deployed, I think, troops. They talked about how, I think he's at 4,000 troops to L.A. L.A.'s gigantic. And he's sending a thousand to D.C., which is, it is not a quarter of the size of L.A. It's more like a 20th the size of L.A., like in landmass, like the area or something like that. So the concentration of troops, they were talking about as much higher. But he's talking about, like, kicking the homeless out of the city, like banishing them beyond the city limits, like it's medieval times. To where? To outside the suburbs of D.C. Like, oh, I think they want them out all the way out. Another, another eight

miles that way. All like St. Louis. That, no, that's not okay. We don't want to. We've got enough of ours here. Look, that's what they should do. A big building, a big beautiful building to get him on board. And then just put them all there, put some nice doctors in, not the nurse, ratchet, mean ones, the nice ones. And like, I went watching his press conferences and he's like, and we're not stopping there. We're going to New York.

We're going to Chicago. We're going to clean out these democratic. He's not picking them by crime rate. He's picking them by whether they're Democratic or not. Memphis has a higher crime rate. St. Louis has a higher crime rate. But these are red cities. in red states, I'll say.

They're like, DC doesn't crack the top 25 in crime rate. They're at a 30 year low in terms of their violent crimes and property crimes right now. But he's just picking the Democratic ones and putting the National Guard there. I'm not, I'm not pro crime, but I think we're looking at the most incompetent president in my lifetime, try to solve problems.

And he's taking like National Guard people with no arrest. authority and having them stand on corners. This is security theater. It's not acting crime reduction. So apparently they can detain people until the arresting authority cops get there. Which seems like

the same as arresting someone. It's like we're resting with extra steps. What's a good way to handle like how kind of shitty a lot of our cities? Because I did see a story also where a commander in the DC police was suspended for hiding the level of crime.

Oh, jeez, that's terrible. So I was thinking, like, so I am also incompetent at solving crime in large cities. But what would I do? First, talk to people who are competent, but things like mental health facilities and rehab facilities for the homeless seem like a big deal to me. And I think the homeless and the criminals,

that Venn diagram is damn near a circle, right? You know, those are the people doing petty crimes, stealing your laundry off the clothes line or your bicycle or your whatever, your motorcycle. Or something. Yeah, yeah. So let's solve the homeless problem by like undoing what Reagan did and finding. If you were like, let's invest in citizens. And instead of these people being a drain, make them an active part of society again, let's try that. Let's give that a go.

Instead of just ignoring them and letting them, you know, multiply and see me grow. And then if you were to tell me we need more judges and prosecutors or actual beat cops with arrest authority, my mind's way open to those sorts of things. Do we need more prisons? I'm suspicious about that. I don't know. But I'm listening. But in terms of like just putting National Guard on the corner pretending to be a security influence, I'm not impressed. It's much like the rest of the things he does where it's not actually effective.

It's just theater, right? You know, what do you just push the tariffs another 90 days down the road for China? He's Taco Trump for a reason that Trump always chickens out taco. You could go like item by item by item. And he seems to care more about having good photo ops than good results. Yeah, I think that's fair. I do think there's a real issue in a lot of our cities of violence. And it makes it so it's untenable for normal people to go down there.

There's drug use. There's people to assault you randomly. Drug use is the wrong way to put it. There's a lot of very lax district attorneys in many of these cities that will just let violent assaulters off on warnings and nonsense. I didn't hear you where. Did you say lax district attorney? Very lax district attorney. So like they have their own little agenda and they see some homeless guy assault someone and they go, oh, well, you know, you can't hold him to the standard that if some other guy who was an attorney assaulted someone.

Because this guy's a dumb retard, which means offie. the solution is to get them back out on that street corner. And it's like no, you're crazy. And there's a reason this is off putting to people. We need to, and it, you know, but I echo what you're saying and that it does, you don't need to do these things cruelly. But it needs to be handled.

And in a way that's not theater. Absolutely. I got no issue with it. We'll see what, we'll see what happens. I wish they would round them all up and do something with them. Like, I think, yeah, some some, some sort of camp, some sort of facility. Some, that, they,

They need to go to different places. There are some people that need to be rehabilitated. There are some people that just need a job. I'm sure there's a small percentage of those people who are like, man, I wish somebody would give me a chance. I wish I could get on a work crew. I would pick soybeans. I would swing a hammer.

I would, you know, do whatever. And then there are people who are mentally ill who were just like, I saw this crazy lady hanging on to the side of a car on Reddit last night. And she's going, blah, la la la la la la. And he's like, bitch get off my car. And he like floors it. And he starts driving through the city. And she's going,

like hanging on the side of the car and the car's like and the gut driver's just as afraid as she is he's like get off my car and it's like she's not looking for a job well that yeah that also speaks to some of the delusion because there are a bunch of people who are like yeah every homeless person is just uh you know learning how to swing a hammer away from paying taxes and it's like some of these people genuine like they can't be in society with the rest of us sorry but that's the nature of large populations you're going to have have some of that fix the ones we can fix and then i i guess howls you know the i need a better word than insane asylum but like the ones that can't be fixed looney ben luni bint i'll take it you know like whatever it is and uh that's what a first world country should do i totally agree yeah

first world countries don't go like actually you're a pussy for not wanting to be accosted by a crazy person and it's like no there are like families walking around trying to get home from like a Memphis Grizzlies game and they shouldn't be like head on a swivel panicking as they're going back to their car like they should you know part of incentivizing growth in these cities is protecting productive generative populations who are who would bring business and industry and tax dollars not you know you're going to get the kind of behavior you subsidize and if you make it easy to be a criminal in your city you're going to get criminals in your city I agree with that so much yeah and um

And then you, you, like, protect the productive people and convert the bad ones to good ones when you can. 100%. Yeah. I don't know. I see those people, every now and then I see a sidewalk in one of these major cities that's been converted into a street bazaar. And it's full of just what looks like garbage, but they're selling it. And it's all stolen stuff. Like, they're sold out of those, like, plastic totes.

And, like, right next to them will be, like, an encamp, like, someone's living there. in a tent. They live in this tent and they sell stolen goods eight feet away on the sidewalk. You hear this, Taylor. He's against working from home. Yeah. Wow. And then like

to return to office guy. I don't like it. And then copy paste that, like all the way down the sidewalk, but interplace a few people who are just doing that like lean where they're so doped up on whatever the trank or whatever

that they're just contorted. and bent in a way that seems to defy gravity. Like, I couldn't bend and hold. Like, sober us can't hold those positions. A yogi would see that and go, oh, he is sintered. He is sintered. The amount of core strength the heroin addict has is insane. They can stand that way for hours on the streets of, or I guess, like Kensington.

I can't look at a person and identify the drugs. But the zombie scenes, I've seen. Philadelphia. What is it? K&A? Kensington and Arlington. That place has been a dump since the 90s. I'm sure it's out of date now, but my friend asked his friend, the cop, what like the worst neighborhood in Philadelphia was? And he's like, Kensington and Arlington. That is the worst corner. And he's like, what makes it the worst? And he said, there are hookers that will do things for $8 there. And I was like, what a metric. You can't get a single meat burrito for that. There's $12 over here. That's the high-end ghetto. Taco Bell Casadilla. Oh, yeah. They have gotten...

If that's what they're... I don't go to Taco Bell, but if they're really charging eight bucks, that's beyond bold. That shit's never been good. It's their best item. And anytime I'm tempted to do it, I'm like, wait a minute.

Cazadeas cost. 12 cents each. Okay, and I have 800 in my cupboard. So... Yeah. Does anyone know why Taco Bell was hit so hard by like, so here's what I've heard. Inflation hit the low-end food stores, like the McDonald's, the Taco Bell's, harder than they seem, bringing them up to be darn near like the Chili's and the, I don't know, but someone with Apple in it. Ruby Tuesday, Applebee. Tuesday's Applebee. Tuesday's Applebee. Yeah, yeah. Why? What's, what is it about Taco Bell that made them more expensive in a way that Applebee's didn't? Because they started so low.

you used to be able to get they had this thing that's like 10 burritos or tacos or soft tacos mix and match and I remember it being like $13 or something like that back in the day and you'd have literally a huge sack of food like way more than a single person could eat like for $13 and like the uh the little items that were all 99 cents or $2 and all that stuff is now $3, four, $5. And it's, it's like, this is shitty food. Like, the only reason we ate this food is because you could get stoned and spend $20 and have more food than two men could eat. Like, it was just this huge pile of beans and fucking sour cream and juice.

They thought they could hide all that nonsense and price increases from us just by adding the Diablo sauce, which is better than the fire sauce. But I disagree. It's smoky and I hate it. but it's smoky and I hate it. It's a disgusting sauce. Verde, if you're going to go with one of the newer classes of sauce, is the superior sauce, but we don't need to go there. I would just touch on the American beef prices, which have only been exacerbated by the 50% tariffs placed on Brazil to prop up their criminal president as a personal favor from ours. We're paying more for our beef trimmings, which is what we mainly import from them, because of that. And every time I eat a lot of steak Like I probably eat at least one steak a week And it's like, holy fuck That's a normal amount

That's actually like I would say like a third of a normal amount I got a porter house And cooked it Yesterday I think Something like that And I think that steak was $35 You know what I mean? Like each steak is like 35

Rib-I is $20 a pound Filet used to be $20 a pound And I don't mean used to be like back in the day. I mean five years ago. Yeah. Yeah, everything's exploded since COVID times. Yeah, Phile mignon, like a prongolet used to be $20 to maybe $25 a pound of if you're getting some Chateaubriand, fancy-ass prime filet mignon.

We've been talking about it. Get on the smoker grind and you can take the cheap cuts of meat and make them tasty as hell. You just got to storm that beach. I'm going to buy, I think I'm going to buy a cow. like buy a butchered one because it's like five dollars a pound for on average for all the cuts of beef my brother's done that before like buying like a quarter or a half cow and then just eating off that for hundreds of parents yeah yeah yeah yeah I don't have a deep freeze so that'll be step one yeah that should definitely not be step two I have so many deer in my yard it's hard not to be like it's that free food just eating off my apple tree yeah yeah So if you want one, like, if you wanted to do that, I think you've probably got a lifetime hunting license. I don't, it's been so long. I don't even know if you need to go do anything extra.

But if you find a deer processor in your area, you can just shoot one of those things. You drop it off with him and then come back a week or two later and pick up a considerable amount of like butchered meat. It's good. It's really lean. And it's tasty. Some people rip on it and they're like, it's gamey. No, it's not. It's really not that gamey.

I don't find it to be gaming. And I've often heard, I have heard. I have heard, I don't know if this is true, that the gaminess is caused by adrenaline and if you kill it instantly it doesn't taste as gamey. I always used a really powerful rifle when I deer hunted and they

died instantly. They didn't run, they didn't take a step. They fell over dead, like dead dead. They're so close, I think they could use a slug and hit. Let's try to be you. Oh, is that

not good? I don't know. I don't know. Well, what if you miss, you know? he's got a hole in the yard it's okay what I'm saying is like a slug's coming out of a shotgun so you might accidentally blow his leg off because you've never shot a slug

at something far away but if you use your rifle with a scope you can shoot him in the heart or in the lungs or in the shoulder my rifles are 2-2-3 I would need something I'd probably want something bigger

yeah it's 223 is like right at the bottom of what I think you should use for white tail it works fine especially if you hit them where you're supposed to hit them. You can use your 50 cow, like no joke. Oh, I forgot about that one. I would need to use the bipod to hit anything.

Hell yeah, you would. It's a lot to shoulder. Go up on the roof of your house. Make yourself a perch. You go on the window right there. Oh, you say that? The guy who owns Tannerite out his, he had a man cave above,

his garage with a pool table and he had like a bar and stuff we were hanging out in there and then there was a window like a like a bay window that swung out with shutters and stuff and he had his a 50 caliber barret sitting there with a suppressor and a scope on it aimed out that window and then 50 yards out at the edge of his yard was a bear feeder so he's he's baiting the bear in and he's shooting him with a barret out of his window while he's drunk on scotch playing pool. Hold on, I'll break after this. This man appears to have life figured out.

Yeah. Yeah. You can't really eat that bear meat. Lousy with parasites, right? No. I mean, when you cook it, it kills all the parasites. Pork's lousy with parasites. I have never eaten bear, but Joe Rogan acts like it's his favorite meat.

He said, he's like, my daughter's went to school, and they did that thing. We're like, what's your favorite food? My daughter was like, bear meat. Does it make you more aggressive, Kyle? Does it make you feel aggressive? That's the lamest take he has, and he still has it. He still does that. I heard him recently being like, I like a good steak, but it's a lazy meat.

You feel lazy eating it. I like elk. You got a chew. You got to tear it. And I'm like, that sounds like a tough piece of old elk meat. I want a soft. I want the soft. That's the same reason I enjoy tennis sneakers.

a nice loafer i put tats in my shoes and walk around on them all day i don't one of those soft rebocks i don't listen to much rogan but when it's like uh the Shane gillis episodes where he's on it seems like they always do like big time booze episodes when he goes on there with rogan and like it is funny in that rogan is like the most competitive guy of all time and everything and he'll like hear Shane Gillis say something like you know you can't out drink me Joe you can't handle me Joe and Joe's like yeah I can

I can I can go beer for beer with you and it like fast forward two hours and Shane's like still joking and Joe Rogan is just like like almost dead like what was he thinking because Shane I don't know how big I'm gonna guess Shane Gillis is domain

like I'm gonna guess Shane is 6 3245 something like that like big man um rogan i think of as five six 200 like something like that probably just you're not going to be able to process the and then Shane is clearly a man who appreciates his beer like and rogan doesn't really drink it seems what was he thinking it wasn't like when he when he challenged burke christ during those guys said those fitness challenges it was like what are they thinking they're thinking. Why are you even entering into a fitness contest with Joe Rogan? You know he's going to get obsessed with it. And it's like, I, the clip I heard. The clip I heard Shane talking about it. He's like, yeah. And like, we finished the episode. And Joe was so drunk, he didn't know we stopped recording. And so we were just sitting in the recording studio chatting afterward, but none of us is drunk as him. And he kept like leaning forward and being like, Shane, say it into the mic. And then I'd be like, Joe, we haven't been doing the show for two hours, man.

none of this is going to air I appreciate his instincts though he's always grinding for the pod but yeah that seems like the guy you wouldn't want to get in a bud light off against is a 6-3 290 pound guy I mean that big is he I hear you

I don't think I could keep up with Joe Rogan I can't keep up with anybody Joe Rogan's daughter let's do it i think i can help drink her yeah oh i think it's about i think it's about dinner time boys oh super dinner time all right pk n 573