Painkiller Already - PKN #85

Episode Date: April 8, 2016

It's PKN time baby!

I just hit start recording. I just did it. I thought that, um... Good for you. For some reason I thought preparation would make things worse. Usually that's not the case, but... That was my excuse for all of my school assignments. Oh no, I have people in the wrong boxes. Let me see. Better. I'm sure it'll be okay.

Yeah. So before we kicked the show off, we were talking about Donald Trump's campaign manager, I guess, getting arrested. So I've been following that thing a little bit. I don't know any of the names, but I guess there's this female Breitbart reporter. Breitbart's usually a conservative site.

And she has been claiming for a few weeks now, several weeks now, that she was assaulted by the campaign manager. Initially, she said that he tried to throw her to the ground and that she was left shaken and then she said it was the second worst thing that ever happened to her in her life, second only to her father dying. Video has come out.

Thank God she found a way to squeeze that in video has come out now what actually happened was this lady kept getting up into trump's face and physically touching him and poking him or frauding him and she goes after trump again and she she like bumps into him again with her hand and she's got this this look on her face which looks kind of aggressive and i guess the campaign manager pulled her back or something like that can we find a picture of what she looked like? I don't. But I feel like we don't have any of the... I was hesitant to even talk about this

because I feel like we don't have any of the pertinent information. Oh, I would hate to get facts wrong. Yeah, I wasn't saying to show everybody her picture. I was saying because I wanted to look. Yeah, yeah. And see what's up. Who knows what the facts are? Who are we to say, Kyle?

We're just reporting information as we hear it what people do with that that's out of our hands she's being so over the top with her description of the events though she's she's making it sound like this guy beat her senseless um that it that it made that it makes me feel like this is motivated by something other than just her looking out for her own personal well-being she has i don't know i find it pretty uh it's kind of a far-fetched tale that someone would just go out there and make something like that up well there's a video and then the video and then they like like they're acting like this is a cruder film

like they're playing it like back like slowly they're like back and to the left back and you look at what did he do did he bump into her? It looks like a nudge or like a really gentle like jostling. I saw someone post on black people Twitter something like, get a load of this, now everybody on the New York subway needs to start filing charges. Because, you know, it's just like when you're in a crowd and you get jostled a little. That seemed to be the extent of all of the physical altercations

that took place. Well, of course they're going to blow it out of proportion. Like they have an agenda. They have a complete agenda. Like if the same thing happened at like their candidate of choices like seminar or whatever they'd be like oh my god Cruz touched me or like whatever was going on. Well there are a few women who say that Cruz touched me. There's a lot of evidence to support that fact too. It seems that Cruz... Dude, this is the best thing happening in politics yeah crews took a few minutes from uh slick willie yes we have hard facts yeah they were

okay okay wait here's what we know um the national inquirer broke a story national inquirer for people that don't know i know here will, is like a tabloid garbage paper. They literally report stories about bat boys and aliens coming to space. It's ridiculous. I saw in the grocery line there was one of them. Hold on. Oh, I'm sorry. I was going to let Taylor go. But yeah, so they have stories that are outrageously wrong, silly, goofy stories.

But they also sometimes break good stuff. They broke something important with the OJ Simpson trial. They broke John Edwards. He was a presidential candidate and a senator from North Carolina cheating on his wife and that turned out to be true. They broke, I'm trying to think, there's been like three or four real solid important news stories that the national inquire broke along with a million aliens landed and made you know crop circles and stuff like they do both they do investigative journalism but they pay the bills by by pandering to the people who like reading ghost stories a lot of votes on the cover of those magazines like up for the longest time i still when i leave like the grocery store i time i still when i leave like the

grocery store i look at those and i'm like is that an is that like reality fan fiction like is it understood that this is false or does someone look at that and be like oh my god like like mel gibson is he still killing jews like still like he was doing it for real like it'll just be a picture of him like with hate in his eyes like two like menorahs remember in men in black the thing was that all the tabloids were real though and that they like tommy lee jones was using that as like a way to like find crime he's like oh shit look at this and he's like all of it was real so there's ted cruz for those probably everybody knows was accused of sleeping with five different women uh six if you include his wife and uh we don't know for sure if

he fucked her yeah but the other five in the air there's one in particular amanda charles that the internet has been pretty successfully sleuthing uh amanda charles the hot one with the red uh tight number that's sitting on the bed with the tattoo so there was a day where ted cruz did an interview and like his jacket was missing. And they made it like the interviewers were like, hey, where's your jacket? And he's like, I don't know. I have to set it down or something. That day she's tweeting out wearing a men's jacket.

That day Ted Cruz and her got matching tattoos. That day she was in a hotel room. Wait, wait. And she may or may not have been sitting. Yeah. They literally have matching tattoos. what was the tattoo i was a man's face or something it was something silly it it must be some inside joke it looked like a monocled top-hatted character or something like some some some funny little cartoon matching

temporary tattoos or play tattoos just to be i think they're real okay so they didn't go into it i was gonna say there's no way ted Ted Cruz saunters into a tattoo parlor at this point unless this was like years and years and years ago let's find out I could be wrong but I thought that they were temporary tattoos like just some sort of gag thing

and she's in a hotel room oh and they spotted them coming out of a hotel together not a hotel room just the same hotel building and there's no real great proof but oh oh and then ted cruz's wife real canceled it's a real tattoo it's winston churchill ted cruz's wife canceled an event with him uh no with she was supposed to go somewhere and like support him and she's like fuck it i'm out so i don't know if she's done more since or whatever

but like it all adds up to what could be a very interesting story there's the tattoo in in our chat in here by the way i hope this is all coming uh coming through to you guys really well with the audio video and all that stuff skype continues to be a motherfucker we all updated the recent version and uh just just lots of issues. A myriad of issues. It's not just one thing. It's not connectivity. It's not bandwidth related either. We're hearing odd things back and forth. It sounds like

I'm hearing snap, crackles, and pops. Woody's modulating in and out, dropping. I'm hearing a white noise roar sometimes. Just absurd bullshit that's never been a part of our Skype experience. So hopefully this is going well. Hey, but what has been a part of our experience that I haven't really been doing lately is bad jokes.

I asked for them. Are you guys ready? What rock group, which rock group has four men that don't sing? Give us a sec. Don't rush these. Which rock group has four men who don't sing give us a sec don't don't rush these which rock group has four men don't rush these he says yeah this is more like a bad riddle than a bad joke a rock group with four men that don't sing it's i always look for weird phrasing semantic things with these so say it

exactly what rock group has four men that don't sing i thought it was interesting you said not to rush it four men who don't sing thinking of rock groups like literal rock groups it's gonna be a pun about a rock group. Damn it. I can't anticipate that. I can't anticipate specific puns. Are you ready? Men who don't sing might be like mutes or... It's Mount Rushmore. Oh, that's not a band. It's a rock group.

No, it's not. It's a rock group. It's a group of rocks. It's a group of rock men It has four men four men that form a rock group Mount Rushmore That is bullshit I don't like it one bit. I don't like it Why don't you find some riddles for us that would be so much more Gollum oh, I'm like a bilbo over here trying to like

sour grapes is all i taste here out of a sour grapes meanwhile it's shit oh it's shit it was a great joke it was fantastic yeah i like those uh lord of the ringsy uh riddles that apparently everybody just has like if someone came up to you and was like quick three riddles you'd be like uh what what year do you think this is? What's going on? Do I win a prize? You couldn't just come up with three riddles. But then Gollum's just like, three riddleses. And he's like, oh, all right.

Well, eats hay twice a day, stays out for the play, never says nay. What do you say? And he's like, horses! And he's like, oh, fuck. And it's like, no, nobody knows these things. No one can just spout off with a real riddle

off the cuff in a high-pressure situation. A sniper in the military, a sniper who was in Afghanistan, if you ran up to him and was like, three riddles now, he'd break into a sweat and he wouldn't know what to do. I would. I think he carried a bomb once

and that pales in comparison to trying to think of three riddles after 1860 dude i saw there was a shooting at the capitol um the thing i don't know if we totally finished with it i'm really excited about the possibility that this could be real this is it is real totally real yeah well it becomes real real when Ted Cruz's wife leaves him. Like I feel like that's the evidence. Because Ted Cruz can see. Oh, and by the way, his denials have been those non-denial denials.

Like did you sleep with these women? This story is horseshit. Well, I noticed you didn't say you didn't sleep with the women. Definitively no. And I also noticed you're not suing anyone. Which is... Because Donald Trump every time... Donald Trump has sued like four people during this campaign.

He's like, very unfair, bad, sad, sue. Donald Trump is like 70. If you misreport his age to 71, expect to hear from his lawyers. Sue's like 70. If you misreport his age as 71, expect to hear from his lawyers. The fucker just sues like crazy. And Ted Cruz is an attorney.

He's no lightweight when it comes to suing. And yeah, no one's getting sued. He just says the story's bad. His wife stopped helping him on the campaign trail. All the pictures come out with this amanda charles is that her name what's her name i think that's what you said earlier i don't know what her name is but she's quite attractive very very nice looking lady i went to high school with an attractive amanda charles i need to look at her picture more closely um who she could be

fucking a potential presidential candidate maybe to get inside scoop, you could message her on Facebook. What was I going to say? Anyway, yeah, totally, this could be the end of Cruz, which means Trump is definitely the Republican candidate, and we'll see what happens from there. Oh, Hillary doesn't want to do debates because Bernie Sanders has been too mean, too negative. Oh, bitch, wait until you get a load of donald like donald trump is gonna have you

and bill rehashing 20 year old blow jobs i guarantee it oh there's gonna be so many late night fights just right just screaming over the top of that really nice not quite yet presidential bed what's her name amanda carpenter is the uh here i've got a i got a i got a link here she deleted her twitter uh amidst all of this because there were a lot of past tweets i guess that dude yeah she tweeted about cruise constantly saying stuff like how cute he was and calling him daddy and stuff like that like she's she's a pretty woman i mean she's not 19 or anything like you know but but have you seen ted cruz right yeah no that's that's a that's a one thousand ted cruz is batting 1000 if if that's his mistress good good job ted i watched you eat

a booger on national television and you have a striking resemblance to kevin from the office but he looks like a thumb he looks like if you just put your thumb like that like there's just there's no like cut in from a chin where a neck would go down. It's just a thumb moving downward, sloping. It's very unattractive. It doesn't even look like neck flesh. It looks like it almost be like breast tissue. Like if you flapped it, it'd be similar.

Doesn't it? His jowl. Push a little titty up there into his jowl. I hope he gets elected so we get like voyeuristic photos of him on the beach just to see where that ends does it go down to his sternum does it maybe caught up right here i don't know these are things silly amanda whatever will make us never know but she knows i um yeah yeah i see and for clinton's in for a real interesting debate against donald trump because she would probably like to like hit him on women's issues and and Yeah, I think Clinton's in for a real interesting debate against Donald Trump

because she would probably like to hit him on women's issues. And maybe she really can't go at him on foreign policy because he'll attack her with Benghazi and a number of other things. Do you think he would, though? Yeah, totally. He had the chance to really nail her on the emails, like their first debate, and he did that you're talking about i'm talking about trump yeah oh trump when trump gets his hands on it yeah yeah

i feel like trump's gonna tear apart i feel like all she can do is really attack if it gets personal she can only like go after his women his stances on women but i feel like he's just got an arsenal of like personal attacks for this woman so in head-to-head polling clinton beats trump right now but i find that really interesting because like dude let's not forget what trump's been doing in this thing he took jeb bush the guy who wasn't going for a nominee who just expected a coronation ceremony right ruined him ruined him just destroyed that guy his political career may never rebound from what Trump did to him. Lots of people think he's an actual retard.

I bet he's impotent now. Jeb Bush can't get it up because of what Donald Trump did to him. Jeb Bush can no longer get an erection because he's low energy. He's just spinning in his head all the time. But wait, I'm just warming up. Next, he took out Rubio, right? Rubio, all of a sudden, is like little Rubio, little Marco, the Marco boy, etc. Lightweight.

He kept calling him small, young, and light. You know, like he just attacked the guy's gravitas. And his physical size, because Marco's a tiny guy. Knowing how much money he has, he probably bought up search terms on Google. Like little Marco Rubio. Face Rubio. Marco's a tiny guy. Knowing how much money he has, he probably bought up search terms on Google. Like, little Marco Rubio. Face Rubio. And now Rubio's gone.

And I don't know what happens to his political career going forward either. There were 17 candidates originally, and all of them are gone except for the three we have. And Casey is just a hanger-on. I feel like Trump beat out Carson, too. It doesn't feel like a ton of them just like fell off it feels like almost video game style like where everybody but trump was ai and he just said the difficulty on it too easy and he's going around and just slaying boss after boss he'd be after he beat uh quiet black doctor sleepy black no no he doesn't he's like he's like a myth character though he's he's like that character in Age of Mythology

which could convert other units. He's converting Sleepy Black Doctor over to his side. His eyes are glowing gold. He's walking by. The highest level monk. He's converted Chris Christie. He's walking around like a giant troll

just stomping shit out. Dude, this is a crazy election. It's great. So circling back, Clinton beating Trump. Oh, yeah. He hasn't gone after you yet. The only reason you're beating Trump, and I'm not saying this as a great Trump lover or anything,

but the reason that... Facts are facts. The reason that Hillary's beating Trump under general polls is because he just hasn't aimed the guns at her yet. Dude, she is so filled with... She is an ammo dump. It does not take much to blow her up. She lives in the biggest glass house. You can't not hit it if you're throwing a stone.

Trump has only really hit Hillary once since his whole thing started. Hillary was going anti-Trump. Let me get the date right. I'll get the exact date. Hillary was going anti-Trump a couple months ago. This is last year. This is what Trump tweeted. I'm trying to put it in the right box.

I went to Skype first. Wait, so Hillary ran the negative ad about Trump or Trump ran one about Hillary? Hillary was tweeting about Trump, and this is what Trump tweeted. Oh, this is great. If Hillary Clinton can't satisfy her husband, what makes her think she can satisfy America? Make America fellate again. She didn't tweet about him again.

Yeah, I remember. What did he put? Oh, I've seen these memes or something where it's like, you know, Bill Clinton didn't choose Hillary. Why should you? Yeah. Yeah, it's going to be brutal. Like, these aren't even, like, political attacks.

Like, I think she's woefully misinformed as to the real situation over there in Ukraine. It's like, yeah, and you can't even blow them right can you oh my god yeah it's good yeah so right now i feel like we're kind of at a low point the next interesting thing i think happens april 15th you know they've been oh sanders won a couple of states that he was supposed to win he swept he won a lot yeah you got like six states, didn't he? It wasn't a ton. It might be. I've got five in my head.

I think it was like 90-something delegates that he picked up, and maybe she didn't get any. And I saw a post. Yes, he is. And I saw a post today, not significantly, but he is closing the gap. I saw a post today that said that they had a road to him winning and he had to take Wisconsin like 60,

40 and New York like 55, 45 and then one other state by like 55 to 45. And that's all he needed to win. So there were some, it seems like that's, I read something similar to that, like that contingency list of, I don't remember all the specifics,

but it's like, but if he does this in this state, then we can stay in it. And then he has to follow that up by doing this at this time here. So let me throw this out. And it's like, that's so many things you have to hit on beat. It's just not realistic. He won, I think, five states that he was supposed to win. But he won them by even more than they expected,

so that was a good thing for him. He narrowed the gap a tiny bit, but the gap is huge. So none of these were upsets for Hillary. But the delegates awarded proportionally on the Democratic side, so winning by 75-25 is better than winning 55-45. So anyway, he did well in these five states, even better than they expected. The thing is, New York is coming up.

That'll be a huge test. Hillary is from New York. I mean, she's been from there for like 20 years i guess bernie was born in brooklyn i didn't know he's there anyway bernie's getting his ass kicked in new york right now if you look at the polls he's losing and he doesn't just need to win he needs to win by a lot to make up some of the lost ground he had throughout the South. And New York has a ton of delegates because it's a huge population. New York, he'll either do well in New York or it'll be obvious that he's out of

the race. Is that when it'll really be? During New York? Not for his fans. I think that if there's a way he can take like 80 of california and still be in it they'll be like we can do it let's just call everyone california is around the clock yeah right i see them phone banking all the time i don't even know how to phone bank

i don't either but but they'll be like just you harass people they're like let's all uh you know give a kiss the asses of these 17 champion phone bankers and they had some names and i was like those are the most annoying motherfuckers on the eastern seaboard right there they must have called thousands of people oh undoubtedly i mean they don't have they don't have a job and i like i've talked a lot of politics. I've talked it on Reddit. I've used my YouTube channel. I've used Painkiller already. I have talked to millions of people about politics.

And I think that thus far, I've changed zero people's opinions. Zero. I don't think I've ever changed anyone's mind on politics, religion, etc. What do these phone bankers do? Do they call people? I think they call registered voters. Yeah? I think they're calling registered voters. Yeah, my understanding is they call registered voters, and they'll be like,

Hi, I'm calling on behalf of Bernie Sanders, prospective Democratic nominee for president in 2016 or whatever. Do you have a moment to talk about his stances or something? And everyone should say, No, if I fucking cared, I would have went on the internet. If I see somebody eating a bag of Fritos, I don't go online to like, you know, nutrition facts and then call them up and go like, Hey, do you want to know how many grams of fat are in that?

No, I don't. I'm just going to go have a do my business. Fuck you. That I, maybe it's impacting my life. Maybe it's not. Probably not. But you calling me is the only... If a Trump supporter called me, I wouldn't vote for him.

I wasn't planning on it anyway, but I wouldn't vote for anyone who called me. I don't like being called at all. It could be someone I like, and I usually don't want... I feel intruded upon. I was already doing a thing, and you're like, hey, you're going to talk to me now. What if that happened in real life?

You're in your room, you're watching Netflix, you're on episode 6 of Daredevil, and all of a sudden Woody just kicks the fucking door, and he's like, let's talk about stocks. Chiz got me fired up. I'm coming in hot. And I'm just like, all right, all right. Stocks it is.

Nobody likes phone calls. I'm on the other side of that. I like talking on the phone rather than texting with people that I know because I can get through it 100 times faster. I prefer that infinitely. If it's someone I don't know, I'd rather just email or something. I have my internet provider. I don't have the heart to tell my internet provider

that I'm not going to upgrade my cable package. I don't want your shit-tier HGTV nonsense, like stop calling and offering. But they call me like every three days and I keep telling them that was not the right time. You want the bundle? Do you want the bundle? Oh, you mentioned, you sent in on a survey that you wanted the NHL package. Well, we can get that for you

if you also want Cinemax, Epix, HBO, the makeup channel, and Oxygen. My wife is giving me a hard time about being mean to service staff recently. Uh-oh. Does your wife know that Kyle gives you shit about that? Yes, she does.

She's very aware of it. Do you think that impacts her opinion, like makes her more on the lookout for it? I do think that that happens, yes. Give him some excuses. Yeah, give him some outs before we even get started. What'd you do? What'd you do? Did you slap a busboy around again? Did you spit in a cook's eye? What'd you do? What did you do? Did you slap a busboy around again?

Did you spit in a cook's eye? What did you do? Here's what I did. Spit in a cook's eye. So we were looking at pools. We were looking at swimming pools, which, by the way, is happening now. We put a deposit in, so it's starting. Woo!

Yeah, we're getting a pool. Thank you. But this is before that, and she calls me back. And I was frustrated because we called the guy we met. We were walking. He comes to our house. He looks at whatever. We have another follow-up for Thursday of last week.

She calls me and says, like, hey, I know you talked to this guy. I'm here to schedule a follow-up. And it's like, I already have a follow-up scheduled. Either she's misinformed or he's a fuck-up. One of those things is positively true. So already I'm, like, not excited about this call. She has laryngitis. So she is the most painful fucking thing you'll ever listen to.

It's like, hi, I'm here to talk to you about swimming pools. All right. Your job is talking on the phone and you came to work today? This is terrible. Could you read me the three-digit code on the back of your card? Yeah. You should have. You should have. Woody, see, this would have been a great time for me to have been at your house.

You could have been like, hang on. I'm going to put you on the phone with my lawyer. He handles this stuff for me. And you put me on. Hello. I'm sorry. lawyer he handles this stuff for me and he put me on i'm on the sand cleanse so she's talking no water for four days it's supposed to make me gaunt i want to look in i've got a high school reunion this saturday so and i'm like yeah we've already got one scheduled i'm trying to explain it to her and the whole time she's just getting back to me in like the

most painful voice possible so anyway this phone call only needs to be like 15 seconds long it needs to be like hey i'm scheduling a follow-up oh we have one thursday at four make sure that he remembers cool that's all the call needed to be but instead it was just a whole bunch of bullshit and she's saying goodbye because we've like solved the whole scheduling thing and and but it was her goodbye oh my god it was like five minutes of like oh don't you hate that if you have any questions then just i'm killing myself like if you have questions call me i'm so sorry I got Laryn Jadis oh it was brutal it was brutal and like I said she just like she wouldn't say goodbye

she kept repeating herself going on and on and on and she can't get me off the phone and I eventually while she's doing her like umpteenth goodbye I was like alright then that's awesome I guess I'll see him Thursday like umpteenth goodbye I was like all right then that's awesome I guess I'll see him Thursday have a nice day and I hang up and Jackie's like you hung up on her didn't you and I'm like well I mean I said bye right I know she was still going but we uh you

did nothing wrong see on the phone things are very different okay now if I go to a place of business and a person is standing there There's tipping and stuff involved. That's a whole different scenario I feel like I it can be demeaning at times to talk down to a server, but over the phone Nah you you I I almost always hang up on them like if I'm calling and needing information like I if I call a parts Store and and I'm like hey, I need these hydraulic lifters. It's a Silverado. The engine code is M. They're like,

well, I can get them in Saturn. There's no reason to follow up with this guy. We're not close pals. He doesn't need to finish his sentence and wish me luck. I don't want him to order them. I need them now. Well, I guess you don't want it.

I'm just going to hang up. I hang up on those people, I guess you don't want it. Just going to hang up. I hang up on those people. No, you didn't do anything wrong there. You certainly didn't insult her. I thought you were talking about a restaurant story. I've got another one. This one I was polite with. So I took my tractor to get serviced.

I'm sure people don't know, but there's this real expensive service that happens at 50 hours. They change every fluid in the whole tractor because there's little metal shavings or something from it being new. Anyway, while I'm there, I'm like, hey, do you have a box blade? It's a thing people use to like level ground and such. And he's like, yeah, I do. So we go out and we look at it and it's rusted to shit. Like it's been sitting in the grass for I don't know how long. It's faded and it's rusted to shit. Like, it's been sitting in the grass for I don't know how long.

It's faded. And it's rusting. And when I, like, there were, like, a patch of rust. You can picture, like, a little dime-sized patch of rust. There were maybe 32 of them, you know, to grab a number at it. And I'm like, oh, it's a used one. He's like, no, this is new. And I was like.

Someone didn't take care of it yeah i was like it's faded and there's rust on it and he's like well i grow grass because it's sitting in the grass and it's like you grow grass it's not new anymore bitch like you can't sit it out in the weather and the grass for however long it takes for it to fade. In that case, I'm just like, well, I don't want that one. Right? Yeah, yeah. Which is kind of where I was. I guess I non-verbally said, oh, so you're selling it at a new price.

I said that, but not quite that blunt. I was like, oh, but this is like the new price, $6.50? He's like, yeah, it's new, never been used. No, no. What an idiot. Yeah, I don't like the way he answered you with the whole like a Confucius say thing. Like, well, I grow grass.

You should have been like a... Well, it grows rust. You should have answered in your own weird Confucius thing and then just left. Just been like, well, you know, at the end of the day when you think about it we all grow grass hey some camels have two humps some of them have ones you think about that and just walk the fuck away then there was more like i so i wanted a backhoe and i asked him last year about a backhoe and i think he told me it was like six to seven grand or something.

I talked to him recently. He's like, it's $7,500. And I'm like, oh, $7,500. Like, I want it, but it's just a lot. It's more than it's worth to me. And I'm like, you know, did they come in cheaper or whatever? I was like, I could have sworn it was like $6,500 last year. And he goes, oh, yeah. Well, you know, they took the $ took the thousand from there and put it there.

What the fuck are we talking about? They took the thousand from... All right, Woody, I can solve your problem here. Where are you going? Why are you going to Gypsy Trailer Parks in southeastern Romania? Well, I have a coyote, so it's the dealership that sells new tractors.

Okay, that's right. I'll give you a good price. Like, you're going to have to find a tractor mechanic who does it part-time as a Navajo wind talker. I don't know what any of that shit means. I actually... So the service is a separate but attached business,

and I really like that guy, Jimmy. I talk to him. He knows what the fuck he's talking about. Jimmy's good. And when I talk to Jimmy... Steely Jim. He usually has to clean his hands to talk on the phone. And I like that. I'm like, oh, he's a guy who knows what the fuck is up, you know? Yeah, efficiency.

Dirty man. Yeah, you know, I like him. Why get the phone dirty in a mechanics office, you know? So, but when I talked to the other guy and then by the way when we left he gave us this real disappointed like disapproving look like like if i used 10 minutes of this time i should really be spending you know between one and ten thousand dollars i mean he did walk outside and everything and i just i i would love for kyle to meet this guy because Kyle gets along with everybody, right? Kyle, like you drop it in any environment.

It can be Boston. That's not always true. There are some weird people. Like if someone's antisocial, it's difficult to like just fall right in with them. Like the mechanic that I went to for a while, this guy with like seven total fingers, like I felt so uncomfortable with him. Like it was always some bullshit. I would be like, okay, so how much does that cost?

I'm having to push him through how conversations work. These questions are leading somewhere, in case you didn't notice. I didn't just come to hang out. I'm here on a mission. My wife was talking to this guy. By the way, he's a salesman. I forget what the specifics were but she

kept making like little jokes or hints or whatever where he could hit it back you know even if you just say like man the weather's cleared up it's beautiful today hit it back you know sure is yeah it's not hard but this guy is just like a lot of a dead hole of a conversational black hole like they go in but they don't come out and what does come out is shit like yeah they took the thousand from here and put it there and i'm there was i don't know what to make of that i have a good story about someone that uncomfortable he uh nice guy but he just didn't know when to respond and how to respond to certain things socially and graduated high school didn't think about him for years went back it was like my junior year of college i was at the mall with a couple friends maybe it was a family whatever and i was going to

the food court to get some food went to chick-fil-a and so i go up to the chick-fil-a and i see this guy that i went to high school with same graduating class as me standing there taking orders at chick-fil-a and his line was open and there were two people in the line in front of me for this other lady. And so I just got in line behind him there and was just like, oh, please, don't see me. Don't see me. Don't call me over. Oh, God. And he was just like, oh, Taylor! Oh, I got you right over here! Like, screaming in the middle of this food court. And I was like, all right, Jesus, dude.

Like, I'm like the grand poobah of Chick-fil-A. That I'm like, you know, man, this guy, you think you hatea that i'm like you know man this guy you think you hate gays wait till you talk to this guy this guy hates gays love him at the chick-fil-a christmas parties um and so i was like all right so i walked up to him and was like hey what's going on man how how are you doing just like he said just a softball he says i'm doing good good to see see you. What can I get you? That's what he should have said. I go, how's it going with you, man? He goes, real bad, real bad.

Broke up with my girlfriend about six months ago. Had my own place. Moved back in with my parents. Had this job. Wasn't working out. Now I'm here at Chick-fil-A. It's fine. For the most part, it's fine. There's people behind me now. Do's like they do they think i'm i'm like grilling this guy and it's like oh what's what next governor what do you do when you get in the

chicken nuggets that's the next step you don't like it was so uncomfortable until eventually like after his like two minute long diatribe of like this is going wrong that's going wrong i lost my job my car busted i was like oh man yeah but i'm gonna take a spicy chicken and i'm also gonna want to diet dr pepper and i'm gonna need a lot of buffalo i ask for buffalo and i usually don't get enough so more buffalo than you would think i just get it down here not from you from down okay it was horrible it's one of those memories that like you have to like think about something else right away as soon as you think about it you know just like oh teenage me used to do that like it so i don't know somehow i thought i was being honest and forthright and

like open an open book so i used to work out at this gym and like a lot i don't know three five days a week and uh one of the guys that worked there would just, I guess he did work at a gym. But otherwise, he just seemed to have everything together. He was real good looking. His body was like high energy. He was always in a good mood. Just kind of seemed to seize every day and enjoy his entire existence. I don't know if he did or not, but whatever.

And he'd be like, Woody, how you doing? And I'd be like, ah, you know, a little sore right here and feeling busy. Tons of homework right now, but mostly okay. And I would just give, like, accurate status reports every time. And after a couple weeks, he was like, you know, Woody, when someone asks how you're doing, you tell them you're doing good. That's what you say. It would be funny if he just spilled his guts. He's like, oh, really?

You're a little sore. Well, actually, my mother got hit by a train last week, but it wasn't that big of a deal because her and her new husband have been suing my father's estate for the last 15 years. And, well, it's all falling apart and going downhill. My wife's also sleeping with actually that guy over there, the boss, nothing I can do about it really. The whole reason I'm with you is to get my revenge someday.

But, but yes, it was actually a really good lesson for me. Teenage Woody needed to hear that. Teenage Woody. I didn't know. I thought I was answering. I thought I was answering.

How are you doing better than everyone else did. But in reality, I was just a douche. You wouldn't want to ask that question to so I don't mind that I think that was definitely the case but that's not that unusual for someone that's you know younger like I don't mind some sharing it just depends on the environment like like and the person I say some extent how you doing lately like what's new yeah I could catch up yeah sure i can tell you some bad stuff you know i i would feel okay doing that especially if i wanted to get it off my chest

if the guy at the counter at the gym you go to says how you doing he's looking for good yeah and at the most i'm maybe i'm a little i'm a little sore do you have anything for that you know maybe i could buy something from him but that's all he's interested in he wants to sell me a muscle milk or something you notice how the people that have those kind of problems usually where they just answer wrong like when they do

it to you you're not like super surprised because they look differently they're like very rarely just like that perfect specimen of a person where you walk up and you're just totally blindsided where it's like, what the fuck is going on here? Like something got mixed up in heaven or wherever God makes people. Um,

but I, I knew one person in college like that where he was, he worked out every single day, multiple times was jacked out of his mind. The best shape, probably objectively the best looking guy I've ever seen. Just symmetrical face, just chiseled jaw, the whole thing.

Well put together, good hygiene. Good hygiene, yes. Really, yeah. Fun guy, but I'm a guy. I'm not a girl. And any girls that we knew would always be like, oh, is he going to be around next time? Like, we're here or there? And he'd be like, I don't know, maybe he will.

And we'd kind of giggle about it. Because then, like, one of the girls was really into him. Was like, like i'm gonna go flirt with him at that party tonight uh we got there later and this kid i don't know what he's doing but he's just like jacked looks great he walks up to her and it looks like he's gonna go flirt and he just goes like just like right in the middle of her nose he booped her yeah he just right in right off this party. And it's like, what? Like, you could see immediately that her face kind of go like, oh. Oh, okay. All right.

Well, you know, not a total loss. But at the end of the day, he seemed a little short, Bussy. Yeah. Yeah, he just booped her. That's a little different. Which is not something that you picture people who look like an Abercrombie model to talk like you imagine them to, you know? you picture people who look like an Abercrombie model to talk like you imagine them to, you know,

I wonder if he's been so good looking that he never was forced to develop those other skills. That only happens to women. I think, is that true? Here we come in from, I would agree that that is true or, but I don't know if it's a hundred percent only.

You're talking about good looking. I bet he had lots of guy friends. And he probably played team sports and shit too. Yeah, he did. He's probably always in some sort of camaraderie type situation. Bunches of guys. And yeah, I bet that guy's... I liked hanging out with him.

Because that's funny. As long as you're not getting booped on during a flirt. That only happens to women. And it's a good thing that it does because the universe has to make itself right somehow. And you think that solves it? Well, I feel like they're sort of emotionally crippled

and at some point their looks wear out and then they pay. Oh, I see. Yeah. I get it. I am not taking that bait. Sooner or later we have to. Me and Taylor have been playing a bunch of Age of Mythology, but we've really been struggling to get Chiz to hop online.

Really? So since you retired that guy. Chiz doesn't want to play anymore. How many games did he play with us total? Five. he doesn't want to play how many games did he play with us total five maybe a pka topic because he'll be in the background there and oh i know what i'll say you know what now this this will be only the paid patreon people will hear this before pka next time chiz is on the call we should just steer the conversation in such a way that he's compelled to speak out loud. Right? Because he's done months

without saying anything, right? We could just rip the fuck out of Barry Sanders, Chiz himself. Barry Sanders. You aren't that great at football. Okay, Bernie Sanders. My mistake. We could talk about his hat. We could just say things that weren't true.

We could underestimate his contribution to the stable. It doesn't matter what we say. Just get him to speak up. I don't know why he didn't want to play Age of Mythology with us more. I thought that would be right up his alley. I do know that if we could build a narrative around it that would make him want to join the call. I think we should build the narrative that he's bad at it

because it's a game that requires a lot of quick thinking and being on your feet, and that's just not his style. He's better at a sedentary game like Civ where he could sit back and meticulously calculate, but now that it's all run and gone and it's click, click, click. No, no, no. Call it a more juvenile game like Civ. No, no, no. Call it a more juvenile game. No, no, no.

Call it infantile. A more infantile. That even Stephen Hawking could excel at. The thing Kyle's headed towards is that – what is it? Age of Mythology? It takes too much athletic ability for Dr. Chiz to play it. That's the line he's taking. This is ridiculous. That's why line he's taking. This is ridiculous.

That's why I'm wearing my sweats right now. I need to be able to hit those hot keys. I'm in a high-performance fabric, you know, whisking away all of my perspiration for this game. If I could say, like, the first – I think when we were playing with Chiz, you were still – you weren't nearly as good as you are now. Like, you've kind of hit a stride where you're getting better quicker now because you're figuring it out. But you were not good at all when we were playing with Chiz, you were still, you weren't nearly as good as you are now. Like, you've kind of hit a stride where you're getting better quicker now, because you're figuring it out. But you were not

good at all when you were playing with Chiz, and Chiz was better than you. But I would say now, you are definitely better than Chiz. Just based on what he was doing. Because there was the game we played with him, where I think it was like a free-for-all, and I just blew his base out. And he was just like, I'm just building a whole army

of workers. Yep. And it was like, really? that's a really convenient bit of plausible deniability aha see you destroyed my base so easily so early in the game it was because i intended it the whole time i was just building workers as a farce it's like what my favorite my favorite game we played is when i hit your base with that that strike. And I was like, yes, I beat Taylor. And I just completely wrote you off. And then Chiz was building his wonder, and I was completely focused on him. And I thought I had beaten Chiz,

and then you come back from the shadows and just tore my base apart, and I lost. That was very frustrating, but that was a fun game. That meteor strike scattered me to the winds, but I just moved all my workers to the two corners of the map, and then just as you're distracted by Chiz, just destroyed your whole base. Yeah, you did.

That's a really fun game. Woody, I think you should at the very least maybe spectate us playing one time or something and see if you're into it at all. I wish I could spectate you for free. I could watch some YouTube videos, but it costs $1. Oh, I didn't think about that.

Yeah, it's $35. $35, yeah. I'm like like do i want to pay 35 just to spectate and see if i ever want to play it seems like a you know um actually i have a perfect video that we could watch right now it's a spit it's one of those super sped up like um but we're doing pkn right now is it like would that be a good thing to include? Yeah, so we can keep talking about it. And it's audio only for most people? Ah, oh yeah, fair enough. Fair enough. I'll show you later. Oh, I didn't think about that.

Anyway, yeah, I think, I don't, I really don't know if you would like it or hate it, Woody. It's way, way, way faster than Civ, and just difficult in its own way. Do you really describe the game? It sounds like a game I would really like if I felt like gaming right now.

It's, I don't know how to, like I have been going to bed on time, waking up in the morning, enjoying my days. I feel like I hadn't done that for a lot of the winter. You know, I went through a spell of Woody Cryer. I was working till like 4 6 a.m every day sleeping until noon and i'm just happier we pulled 20 trees out of the ground today felt good that does make you it puts you in a funk when you get in a cycle like that even if

it's the exact same amount of rest you just rotate it it's just for some reason like i guess maybe you don't get enough sun or something. Maybe that's not it at all. Maybe it is. But I noticed that when I get a lot of sun, it makes me more tired. And you feel just kind of more upbeat. Yeah. And I think everyone's like that to some extent.

And I think that, of course, I've only been me. But I think that I'm extreme in this regard. And I'm just happy right now. You're like, hey, Woody, come back into the office shut the blinds we like to play agent mythology from like midnight to 4 a.m and i'm like uh-uh you keep your crystal meth to yourself you know i'm out here like doing cool stuff yeah i don't want to say above god i'm certainly not right do you remember that or was that the catchphrase when you were younger what above the influence was like the dare drugs and violence class that i'm sure me and kyle had to take that stuff right i'm old school i'm just say no

yeah yours was uh stay away from the reefer it was just say no nancy reagan and just say no it lasted into the 90s um Joe Lozon is fighting Diego Sanchez at UFC 200. I think that's just a rumor. Ah, well it's here on MMAfighting.com. Could be a rumor on MMAfighting.com.

It's not even a.org. It's not confirmed by the UFC yet. But yeah, that would be pretty neat. Yeah, I'd like to see. Oh, and John Jones gets arrested again. Did you see that? Yes. For what?

Nothing. Probation violation. So it appears that it's not in dispute that he wasn't speeding. And the car next to him wasn't speeding yet he's been accused of drag racing so the the cop the way he sees it is i guess he was revving up his motor and they were like gonna drag race and then didn't either they saw the cop or whatever but to me like what's not in dispute is no one took off at Mach 1 and did anything crazy.

And no one sped in this situation. John Jones' story. Now, John Jones is a complete douche that lies. He's been in multiple DUIs. His most recent one, he smashed his car into a pregnant woman hard enough to break her arm, and he fled the scene, and there was, like, coke smashed his car into a pregnant woman hard enough to break her arm and he fled the scene and there was like coke in his car this guy is a fuck piece of shit yeah he's a total

piece of shit um hit and run pregnant women the whole nine yards and a woman and uh so i'm no john jones apologist but his side of the story is this some fans saw me i'm in my corvette i rev my engine you know as a way to like give them something like say hello or like you know fancy john jones in his corvette he revs the engine and then takes off safely from a stoplight and the cop pulled him over for drag racing i think like it's it's conceivable to me that the cop thought he was challenging him to a drag race or like you know like like that might be a normal pre-drag race activity but because he's a celebrity and fans spotted him it i don't know like it could be a normal thing too like like i don't know i mean if that was all i knew i would totally agree but that whole like

prologue of all the shit he's done so far of like hit and run uh i mean i guess that was the bad one but you said stuff like that's happened he has another dui as well if he hit a telephone pole um with has he actually hurt anyone ever other than the pregnant woman? I don't know if anyone was hurt in the DUI where he hit the telephone pole. It was noteworthy that there were a bunch of women in his car that he was coming home from a party with that were not his wife

or his baby mama or whatever he's got going on. A lot of people are like, oh, he got caught cheating because there were women in his car. And maybe. I mean, there's never were women in his car. And maybe. I mean, there's never any women in my car. But also, maybe not. That's not very definitive to me.

No, I'd say that's pretty definitive. Or maybe his lady's okay with him. Maybe he was taking those ladies home to fuck his lady. Maybe his lady was like, yeah, bring three. This is Jon Jones. I doubt he's picked some prude to be his girlfriend, baby mama, or wife or something like that. He wants a lady

who's down for some DUI hit and runs. Who's down for a little cocaine. I doubt this lady's going to have a problem with him bringing home a few ladies in his Corvette. That was a Bugatti, by the way. That car is no more. I'm pretty sure it was. I could be wrong, but I think that's what it was.

So, yeah, this guy's a total shitbag. Coke head, you know, et cetera. He just – he's a shitbag in a lot of ways. But in this case, like, even the cop agreed he didn't speed. So, I don't know. Like, probably nothing will come of this at all. For it, he seems like the kind of guy, from what you've said, that there's going to be in 20 years a 30 for 30 made about him

and how he lost all of his money to eight months after he retired because he got sucked into some scheme. I don't know. It just seems like that's the kind of behavior that would lend itself to that outcome. It helps him that he's got two celebrity brothers. Both of his brothers play in the NFL. His dad has some amazing sperm, I guess. All the kids are pro athletes.

But still, like you said, it just doesn't look good, does it? This guy is going to trend ugly at some point. And right now, he's in a tough spot they stripped the title form for crashing into that pregnant woman and stuff and he's about to get another title shot but these are not his darkest hours his darkest hours are six years from now when he's not a great fighter anymore right when he's feeling a little bit punch drunk when he you know he can beat everyone in the world it seems when that gets taken from him then who is he and he'll have to answer that question and it won't be easy i wonder what happens to him then so yeah sports one thing i i like about the UFC is I feel like I get a little insight into the athlete as a person.

Like football, right? I don't know anything about Tom Brady except for what he does on the football field. That's it. His wife's really hot. Yeah, that's like the most you get out of an NFL player. What do you know about LeBron James or whatever? Just not too much beyond the court. Loves his mama.

But I don't really know who he is. I don't know if he's a moody guy, if he's a happy guy, what he's like when he trains. In the UFC, you know people. You kind of know guys at a level anyway that you don't see on these other sports. And I don't know. And it's the win-loss business, and it's so harsh.

You know, you win, amazing things happen for you. You lose, terrible things happen for you. It only takes two or three losses, and your whole career is over. And it happens all the time so it's it's high stakes and it's amazing to watch but that's that's me going on about fighting how's colin doing good so april 8th if i have the date right his boot comes off it's six weeks to heal and he's four and a half weeks in he's walking around fine uh he wants to go boot shopping immediately and he wants to start chopping wood again so i've got to figure out something to do

for that i found boots that are cut resistant that are like kevlar almost and i guess they are literally kevlar and uh and they just they're resistant to cutting and maybe we can get something like that for him and I'll feel better, like a nice steel toe cut resistant boot. And I also have a hydraulic splitter, which I think might be a little safer. We can do that, finish up the job until the next job.

But he's doing really well. He's in a boot now and it protects him and it helps him walk, et cetera. I wonder when that boot comes off and he sees that maybe his calf is atrophied or, or something, if, uh, how hard it will be to get him to be okay with it. But, um, it'll all come back eventually. Yeah. Yeah. That's good. But, um, I'm excited. So when he, obviously when we first had the surgery, he was really, um, susceptible to re-injury, right?

There's just stitches holding these two tendons together and they're not very strong. And then I'm like, all right, it's been two weeks. I guess it's a little more than just stitches. There's some sort of like sinew, like, you know, blood circulation happening again. Now that he's four and a half weeks in, and by the way, he's 12, right? Six weeks is what they'd ask adults to do. A 12 that he's four and a half weeks in, and by the way, he's 12, right?

Six weeks is what they'd ask adults to do. A 12-year-old at four and a half weeks, like in my own little, you know, Dr. Woody unskilled know-nothing self, I'm like, I bet at four and a half weeks, a 12-year-old, it's out of the danger zone, you know? Not about that tough, you know? Yeah, right?

Like, you know, like he didn't want him to even wiggle his toes straight out of the surgery. Like, don't wiggle your toes. Don't test those. Like, just rest. You just don't do anything. Now we're four and a half weeks in. I bet he can wiggle his toes, you know. I bet that's not the problem.

I bet he's wiggling his toes on the sly constantly. He might be now. I know he felt nervous. He's like, he wasn't sure if he could. So my wife like gave him permission to wiggle his toes just yesterday or something. They all still work. So yeah, the boot comes off the first week of April, at the end of the first week of April or something.

So that'll be really cool. That would be infuriating. Just like imagine right now without even an injury you can't wiggle your toes for the next six weeks immediately i want to wiggle my toes yeah i have to crack them now like i have to move like that'd be awful i crack my toes like constantly like like i'm always like doing them on the floor um that that would drive me insane yeah you'd make it like an hour and a half in until it was just a

and then oh back to the hospital I can't drive Kyle no that wouldn't work how would you get there I would drive left footed I would drive myself I would drive left footed happened you could i would drive myself perhaps i could

drive left footed just pull my right foot back i got long legs it wouldn't be a problem i think panic though like your cars your blood everywhere you probably shouldn't be driving what if you pass out who would be your driver what have i done to myself why is there blood everywhere you've axed your foot it's bleeding bad like you're you're starting to go pale in and out you probably shouldn't drive yourself if you're going pale and in and out like colin was and you're vomiting yeah you feel like sleeping you might want to call 9-1-1 yeah there's an there's actually an ambulance station about three quarters of a mile from my house it's like where the ambulance is like sit and wait for a call so i would probably drive there um oh you drive to the ambulance place but shouldn't you

drive to you like yeah that seems like one of their services you don't know how ambulances work you know well you gotta make an appointment you forgot i've lost a lot of blood here i'm not thinking clearly. You asked me what I would do. I didn't say it was going to be good ideas. I've lost blood. I'm all shaky. I'm vomiting.

I'm confused. I turned left. I ended up at the ambulance station. Oh, yeah. I love your car. I would get my girlfriend to drive me if there was like – because she's here most of the time. But I would probably drive myself if I did need to go because it is eight or nine miles away, and seven of those miles are on the interstate.

So I can do 80 and get there in seven minutes or something like that. I feel like putting that hospital or that medical center right across the street from your house was like the one bit of zoning planning they did but they're like well not many buildings but you know put the hospital by the meyers house you know that cow he's a good you know i'm just kind of close to the local to the city there so it's it's not too far away but, I've never had a... I haven't had a major injury like that in a really long time. I've driven...

We're all pretty safe around here. Scott gets some cuts and stuff every now and then. I've seen some video of you within the last two years where you were feet from dying. You're always feet from dying. You're always feet from dying. Every time you're in a car doing

60 down the freeway, you're feet from dying time you're in a car doing you know 60 down the freeway you're you know your feet from dying you go a little bit but those things were not planned like you yeah and also when you're driving around and you like barely swerve out in the front of a semi like you're like breathing really heavy you don't turn around and go like and the next time we do those semis. Like, I don't know. Do it over again. You just go, oh, I'm out. Count my blessings, and then that's it. You know, stuff happens sometimes.

But, you know, for the most part, as far as, like, I haven't axed myself or drilled myself or smashed my hands or anything in a long time. Doesn't FPS Russia have a video coming out soon? Yes. You shot it. Do you know anything more about the ETA or it's stuck in it? Um, soon.

No, that should be soon. Do you know stuff you're not saying or just that? No, I'm just waiting to get it back. Okay. I don't know. Sometimes you, you know, like, oh yeah, just waiting for it to get back. And you're like, oh my god, really? Is the dog okay?

Is the dog gonna live? What dog? I just made that up. I wanted to use a non-real thing. I don't know what happened to this today. No, no, no. There are times when, like, there are things that you tell me that you can't tell everyone else. And I was wondering, like, hey, is this one of those times?

But it appears that it's not. And it's just waiting for our editing. Uh-huh. Do you see what he's doing Taylor I'm not doing anything I'm trying to act and I'm a question accurately he I I think he is being honest this time I think he's just saying there's nothing going on yeah yeah he's I mean his words are very clear but he's like, yes. You're the boy.

Just editing. Waiting on that. Just editing, yeah. Just editing. Just editing. Yeah, right? Meanwhile, he's doing, like, the baseball, like. Doing signs.

Yeah. I'm clear. I wonder if that ever comes into play when they really need to get some like super duper secret message out there that's impactful I feel like most of the time they're just being assholes and telling the guy to either swing or take it and I feel like they should come up with some

a little less silly I also feel like in baseball, it's a lot more closed circuit than a lot of sports. You couldn't have a coach in soccer just signing wildly, telling the guy to run eight yards to the left. In baseball,

is that guy's super complicated ritual? Why do you need that to tell him, run to the only place you're allowed to run, or else you fail? I tell them, run to the only place you're allowed to run or else you fail. I think sometimes the complication is so that the other team doesn't figure out the signs. One of the signs means next sign is the

thing. I'll be touching my nose, touching my ears, patting my belly, squeeze the nipple. Oh, okay. The one after nipple squeeze, that's the one. Speaking of nipple squeezes oh have you guys seen the tent the new season of the trailer park boys or have you watched any of it so so Netflix is now making trailer park boys it's not on the showcase network or wherever it was back in the day in Canada and they did a season last year and I didn't care for

it that much. It was just okay. It felt like they had all the Trailer Park characters there. They had the characters, but the story and the way they interacted didn't feel like Trailer Park Boys. It felt too polished. It didn't feel like the show as much anymore. They have recaptured it.

This newest season of Trailer Park Boys feels like the good old days. They've got all the characters back again. It's really good. I'm really digging the newest uh trailer park boys julian has two girlfriends one of them's enormous one's tiny um he's he's running a bar out of his trailer that's very successful jayrock you know jamie he does that uh that hood accent to fit in with the black guys um well he comes back he shows up with this Puerto Rican girlfriend. He's putting on a cholo accent the whole time. He's got this awful cholo accent

that he's trying to pull off in front of her, but then he goes back to the gangster accent when he needs to talk to... The black accent when he needs to talk to his black son. It's really good. Randy, of course, he's the gatekeeper. He shaves his chest now because he thinks it makes him look slimmer but his belly has gotten

bigger and his side business is he makes popsicle crafts but instead of going to the craft store and buying a big bag of popsicles he thinks you need to eat the popsicles one by one he's like they're not popsicles it's popsicle sticks they didn't used to have popsicles on them

so he sits there all day eating popsicles and they're dripping on him. It's popsicle sticks, and they didn't used to have popsicles on them. So he sits there all day eating popsicles, and they're dripping on him, so he's all sticky. And so Ricky goes to shove him, and he's like, oh, God, what's on you? And then another time he gets in an altercation with Ricky, and Ricky reaches into his ass crack and his balls and gets all the sweat and rubs it in Randy's mouth and face and the new villains this year if you want to call them that

it's kind of a social justice warrior kind of thing because they've got these big fat dykes this big fat dyke and nobody can hit her. She's got a pink baseball bat. She weighs 275 pounds. She's like 6 feet tall and everybody's afraid to fight her and she's just always like slapping that baseball bat because she weighs 275 pounds, she's like six feet tall, and everybody's afraid

to fight her, and she's just always like, slapping that face. Because she's a girl? Because she's a girl, and she's physically imposing, like she can handle herself, so she gets Randy's titties, and like gives him super titty twisters, and he's screaming, and he's got purple, huge purple nipples for like episodes.

Every episode. That's a thing that Tra trailer park voice has said so well like yeah you know the guy'll get a cut in his pants he wears those same pants for the next six and a half years with the cut that's never lost like the continuity is so great it's funny and oh and then um it's great when kyle's your co-pilot on it like he got me started on trailer park boys so um who's the guy jules is he the one with the rum and julian julian so julian's in prison and uh like you know he talks about prison now he's going to be better this time this is the pilot episode a few minutes into the whole series and he's like i'm gonna come out i'm gonna stop it i'm gonna get my life

straight etc he comes out and someone hands him a rum and coke. He's like, you see that rum and coke? That's the last time you'll see him without a rum and coke in his hand for the next five years. Years. And there might be a scene. When he puts it down, it's like a moment. It's like, hang on a minute. Hold this.

He's got to handle something. Slow down, slow down. Hold my drink. It's a major moment in the show when that happens. Yeah. He might be without his rum and coke for no more than 20, 30 seconds in the next seven years.

And it's always kind of full. He'll be in court with it. He drives with it. All the time. He's constantly driving with it. They hook to the window washer fluid reservoir to come inside and be a liquor tap. So they hit the window washer fluid button

and he goes, and fills a cup with liquor. It's rum. They're just some degenerate, awful people. Yeah, they're truly, truly bad, terrible people. And I like the way that they're big scores. They're giant scores that they have. I haven't seen a lot of the really new stuff,

like the recent movies and whatnot, but I remember the hash driveway from years and years ago and the big score when Ricky is talking about it and he's like, 50,000 boys. We're all retiring. We're all retiring after this one. 50 grand. And it's like, there,000 boys. We're all retiring. We're all retiring after this one. 50 grand. And it's like, there's seven of you.

It's the greatest rest of your life. He takes, my favorite part, when he goes to smoke the hash driveway, he takes a bottle like this, and he cuts the top of it off and uses just the top, and he sucks through this and uses this to like,

as he's burning the driver with a torch to Like that he's inhaling up It's just and he's always drinking out of the bottom half of like a two liter instead of a cup So lit possible up there now I guess pot's legal up there now I guess so Ricky has opened the drugs store his trailer set has a big sign It says drugs store. And you go in, it's a big marijuana dispensary now.

Meanwhile, his granddaughter, who is a baby named Motel, is right there, and he's using her tiny pinkies to pack joints. He's like, yeah, that's another perfectly packed joint. Thanks.

He's like taking the baby's finger and packing the joint, teaching the baby the difference between hash and weed. It's a good season. I like it a lot. That's funny taking the baby's finger and packing the joint. Teaching the baby the difference between hash and weed. It's a good season. I like it a lot. I'll have to check it out. Call it a show? Yeah, I think so.

PKN episode 85 I hope. Bye guys.