Pappy's Flatshare - House Meeting (Biting the Butter) S10E4

Episode Date: January 28, 2020

Matthew, Ben and Tom slide into your ear canal for a catch-up. They get to the decks, to the buffet and banished from the fish and chip shopPappy’s - https://twitter.com/pappystweetSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareSee us live 3rd February - https://dice.fm/event/k8vao-pappys-flatshare-slamdown-live-podcast-3rd-feb-moth-club-london-ticketsEdited by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman planting her course to free to pat in love for. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things. It's like theaters, December 15th.

Greetings, listen to dear. I'm Tom. I'm Ben. And I've just put a banana in my mouth. Yes, he has! And we got him real good! That's Matthew everyone! Hello everybody and welcome. Oh, excuse me. It's a good, there's a good reason for Matthew to be eating is because this house meeting that we've just recorded, we talked quite a lot about food, actually. House meeting, house eating more like. Exactly, right Clarkies. Welcome to another episode of House Eating.

Not a bad idea for a spin-off show, actually. I know, and now that I'm just thinking about it, it's like we could do some kind of cookery effort where we do a special podcast where we record as we're cooking food for each other. That's a great idea. Worth a try. This is, I mean, I actually, I really like the idea of this.

Yeah, no, I think it'd be a real go-ah. You know what? We can do it around Clarke East. You've got some recording equipment there, I do. Let's do it. Let's do it for 2020. It can be one of the Patreon specials. So if you are a listener and you enjoy,

then get onto Patreon. It's patreon.com forward slash. Pappy's flat share. And become a friend of the show. It's patreon.com.forzlashpappysflashare and become a friend of the show. Give some money and you'll get some bonus footage. Yeah, patreon.com.forzlashpappysflashare. Crucially, if you're not a listener, and if you're not a listener but you do enjoy,

then sure, get on, get on board with a patron. If you're not a listener but you don't enjoy, don't bother. And if you are a listener but you don't enjoy, have a think. Then God bless you. Have a bloody think about yourself for a second for goodness' sake. Right, so enjoy the house meeting. We hope you make sure it's hung with your maid, Crossbe. Yes, and don't forget, if you'd like to come and see us live, then you can see us on the third of February at the Moth Club.

Tickets are available from acast.com forward slash live. See you there, I hope. And see you on the other side of this episode. to chat. Okay, let's sit down and chew the fat. Has beaten beaten beaten. What temperature should we set the heat to? Has beaten beaten beaten. Why on earth am I always weak? Has beaten beaten beaten beaten. Who went my bed while I was sleeping? Has beaten beaten beaten beaten beaten. What's the point? Does life have a Have a meeting. Have a meeting. So, hi. Hello. Here it is. Here I am.

So right, the other day, I bought a bar of chocolates. Oh yeah. Okay. Treats of. Well, it was a treat, exactly. Like a conventional normal one, like a big one, like an evening one. Like an evening one. And now we get an evening bar of chocolate. Here's the thing, this is your absolute 100% right

to say an evening bar of chocolate because this is what happened. I bought it, so it's a bar of chocolate. It wasn't like the green and blacks. It was the co-op owned brand. Right, okay. Isn't it the same? It was the bar of chocolate like four, it's only like four blocks wide or three blocks wide.

Yeah, yeah, we're talking about, it's like a hundred. It's like a hundred gramma. Yeah, it's like a hundred gramma. I like it being called an even bar of chocolate. Well You're not eating it on the go. No, no, it's on the table in front of what you're watching It's it's on the table you're you've got you know you're watching an episode of the bachelor You've got a glass of red wine you're breaking off a little cube of dark chocolate We're doing alright. You know because we're really if you're Do you have a dark chocolate? Lovely, but if it's already glass of milk, that's what we do in our age.

Do you have milk as well? No, because we're really. If you have it as well as white. No, if you have it with chocolate. Chocolate milk, that's very... That's a milk. Right, what's lovely. It's interesting you say that, okay?

Okay. Because I think, here's the thing. I think milk, for me, isn't necessarily the, isn't my evening drink. I appreciate it. It's very much a bedtime drink, milk. A lot of people go for it. But it's not the fact that it's evening drink. It's a companion to chocolate. That's why it's there. If we're not, you can be doing it in the middle of the day. If we're not eating a bar of chocolate, then we're not having a glass of milk.

Right, got you. It's a companion to chocolate. Is having a bit of dark chocolate, or is it with a milk chocolate? Either. Right. Because this is the problem. I unwrapped the bar. Oh, and it was milk chocolate. Wow.

And then suddenly I was like, Oh, this isn't a sophisticated treat. This is little pit boy. You know, this is like little piggy boy in a eating a bar of milk chocolate. You've become a chocolate snob. Absolutely, 100%. I mean, did I eat it? Of course I did. Monch, Monch. Monch, Monch was the little pig boy. Little pig boy. Little pig boy. Monch, Monch, Monch, Monch, Monch, I finished the whole thing. It was, because it was like Himalayan sea salt and toffee,

so it seemed like it was gonna be like a sort of sophisticated dark chocolate. I just didn't read the label properly enough. I saw Himalayan sea salt and thought, this is snobby enough for me. Yes. When I got it out there, it was like a butter dairy milk.

And I think, you know, Himalayan sea salt. Yes. Are the Himalayers salt. Yes. Are the Himalayas salty? Here the sea. What? Emma's Emma, by the way, is like, he's the wheef of his guts and ribs. None of us do the answer. Emma, can you give us, yeah, you can. It's Himalayan pink salt.

It's not sea salt. It's right. Himalayan pink salt. Pink salt. So my question still stands, oh are the Himalaya's pink? Is Everest pink? Why not? I don't, so it's not called Himalayan sea salt.

It's called Himalayan pink salt. Yes, there's pink salt. It makes more sense, you're right, because, but anyway, it was Himalayan salt. Himalayan salt. But forget all of that. The Himalayan salt was the problem. Yeah, okay, sorry. You all of that. Do you reckon? Himalayan salt was the problem. Yeah, okay, sorry.

You're gonna say, do you reckon? Like, everyone got, like Himalayan pink salt is like a thing, right? Or Himalayan, like, you used to know, yeah. If you were doing a taste test, you'd be like, the Himalayan salt's better or more salty. I could tell the difference between sea salt and sort of standard table salt,

but I don't know if I could go the next step. Wasn't it supposed to have some kind of, it's not so much the taste as like the properties, it's supposed to be a bit better for you and have like more minerals and kind of, more like business. They certainly want more effort. It's come alive, I think.

Oh, why? They've been, they've dyed it pink and they've tracked up amounts anyway. They took it up the mountain and dyed it pink. Oh yeah, they just get, they just get normal sort of... It's normal salt, not our pink. Up Mount Everest. Wack it on a Sherpas back, straight up there.

It has to go up and down. It's gotta go up and down. It has to have been to the summit. It's gotta have been all the way to the summit. Then they whack a little bit of... I'll tell you what, this salt really is, summit. LAUGHTER It just feels like one of those things, because it's just a thing and you kind of go, well,

yeah, have a bit of a Himalayan pingsal. You kind of go, you just assume that it's got to be great. I do, I mean, I do use Himalayan pingsal on my breakfast in the morning. On your breakfast? On my, on your frosties. Not on the frosties, no. Speaking of frosties. Speaking of which. Speaking of which. The other day, I've got to start paying attention. The same day? Different day. I bought my shreddies. I went to eat a bowl of shreddies.

I bought frosted shreddies. Wow. I made the bite. Why am I buying all this kitty food? You're, you're baby brain. It is my baby brain. That's what it is. You're making daddy errors.

I'm making daddy, making daddy errors. Didn't I? I'm not sure I it is. You're making daddy errors. I'm making daddy, yeah. Making daddy errors. Didn't want to show. I'm not sure I love the phrase making the phrase. No, I'm going to stick with it. Daddy errors is my DJ name. Is it? Dad errors in the house. How is that spell?

It's called E-era's. Oh. Big daddy errors. The big daddy error, I think, really was the golden age of British resting. So around the 1980s, I'd say. That was a big Daddy Era. So I know he's taxed. The giant haystacks, early crafter.

So, oh god, I... So you've been buying things that are slightly... I mean, like frosted shreddies. Infantilizing, maybe? Yes, yes, yes. So they're slightly infantilizing crops. What comfort of a grassy... Have you had some?

Yeah. Yes. And is it, how do you feel about it when you have them? It's a lot of sugar that early in the morning. It's a lot of sugar. I had to put a lot of Himalayan pink salt on to counter balance it. I'm not sure that's making it more.

No, listen, mate, I felt it as a fiddle. And where's your sugar from, the Alps? K2? I don't know, where's your sugar from? It's frosted, because it is frost. It's real frost. It's a fiddle. Where's your sugar from, the Alps? K2? I don't know where you get the frost in the frosted, because it is frost. It's real frost. It's real frost. It's real frost.

They put on there, it just happens that at the top of the Himalayas, that frost is extremely sweet. The salty. Yeah. Eris Salty, the frost is sweet. That's what they say. Together we learn to read and write. Read and write.

Read and write. Read and write. Do you say no to milk chocolate these days? Yeah, I don't really have milk chocolate. I mean, I have. You've moved away from milk chocolate. It takes me a long time to finish an Easter egg. Months. I've heard that about you.

Months to finish an Easter egg, it takes. Obviously, if you love Easter eggs. If it's out there and it's about there, I'll munch it. But generally, I'm a dark chocolate man. It feels like you're not eating chocolate. You feel like you're doing something good for you. You know, like you think, oh, this is pretty good. You just don't like it very much, is what it sounds like.

What's that? It feels like it's good for me. I'm not gonna eat too much for it. No, I still eat a whole bar of it, but I feel like it's something about it that feels richer and more nourishing. Is Emma's back in with it? Caution team is nodding away here.

Can I just say, by the way, for this, stay on the mic, because we enjoy talking to you, and you seem to know a lot more about the world than we do, which is true. It's not hard, but it's true. Go on. Well, there is stuff for apparently in dark chocolate

that is supposed to be healthier. The pink soul is like unsure like the chemicals are actually any better. It's look, more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time.

It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's a bit more of a waste of time. It's hard enough, pchau. But it's very much the sort of thing that if you are a little bit feeble minded, which I am, you might go, I'm actually doing something good here by having Himalayan pig salt. I believe, you know, the dark chocolate does, it's less sugary for a start, and it's also

got some antioxidant, I'm sure. It's basically a health food snack, isn't it? There's caffeine in it though. What? It's like a dark chocolate. Do you know what I tell you what? Like not masses, but there is a bit. I always get people going when I say I don't drink caffeine. They go, oh, but you have chocolate.

I'm like, is that? Oh, who are these cups? Yeah, bring those bastards in here. Yeah. And we'll really work them over with a two by four. A two by four of dairy milk. Who are these cunts? Yeah, bring those bastards in here. And we'll really work them over with a two by four. A two by four of dairy milk. A two by four of dairy milk. Which is a weekend.

No, I think that's interesting because when I go to bed, I'll treat an bar of chocolate. I'm wide awake like a drugs person. You know, I've got, I'm gurning. No, that's the drugs that you do after the chocolate. A little bit of Mandy, no, that's not going to hurt anyone. It's a big drug. Come on. Mandy, I just, I sprinkled that on my breakfast in the morning.

A little bit. Oh, that's your frost on your face. Mandy is very much like a man named Frost on your shirt. This is my DJ-eraas catchphrase. Big daddy eras says cannot put a little frost on your shirt. It's not a bad catchphrase for a DJ. Can I put a bit of frost on your shirt? He's on big daddy era.

Big daddy era, I like big daddy eras. It's good, good. Big daddy eras, it's really grown on me over the course of the last two minutes. It's not bad, I don't want to avoid you, Bizz. What stuff? What kind of stuff would you be playing? I'm assuming rare grooves some kind of rare grooves and fat beats I guess this somewhere between everything between the two Yeah, yeah, but but the liberate you make a deliberate mistake

Don't look at me that way You play the song on this mistake. I did that on purpose but some flash on your shreddies. Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam. And then off you go into the night. Oh, that's the end of the night. That's the end of my set. It's a short set.

It's a short set but it's an effective one. Who did on this mistake? Who was it? Do I kill his? No. No, I was very. Could have been the bravery. It was. I was thinking. I was thinking it was Natalie and Brulia, but that's a big mistake. But, in a way, if it's got a mistake in it, on playing it, they did quite a lot in,

no, let me get this right, because I'm going to say it's an all-out. Oh, no. Okay, sorry. Yeah, because so far you said it's so, yeah. It was a bravery. It was a bravery. They do quite a lot in, is it grime? Well, like slow time people like that, where they start a track and then they go, no, no,

could it, could it, could it, and then they start, but it grimes to a whole. We talked about this the other day. Yeah, when I went to a grime night, yeah, this will happen that people will start a song and they'll either not be feeling it or the crowd will be feeling it and just stop it. And off they go. And this is what you do, that's what a DJ does.

That's why I go. That's why the name big daddy air. Yeah, he'll start playing a bit of the bravery and go, I've misjudged you. Cut, cut, cut, cut. Rup, rup, rup, rup, rup, rup, rup, Yeah. And then I'll say, I'm like, catch phrase, and then I'll do. Rupip, rupip, rup and if you don't, you don't see it.

I play a little bit of a song on the set. I play a little bit of a song that's got the word mistake in it. Then I cut it halfway through, do my catchphrase, five beats, and then I'm out. That's really good. I like the idea of a novelty act. I mean, there's a lot of novelty to it. Thank you.

What are you charging for? What are you charging for? I'm my advert. What are you charging for a wedding? Oh, upwards of 50 quid and some buffet. Oh, you get you get to get on the, but surely you've gone, I'm out of here. I know the by the bottom. He's got a plate ready. He's plated up pretty DJ set so he could just, he could eat it all his way to the car. I went to a wedding a few years ago

and they said the buffet is open and I was straight to the buffet. First one. First one there and then I heard the guy who was an answer to the buffet was open to him. There's only one stipulation, only one stipulation. You've got to make sure that Tom and Ellie get served first and Charlie and I were already there

at the buffet. We're ready to do. We had a half a plate. We Charlie and I were already there at the bus. Oh, we're only, we're only, we're not a half a plate. We have to go and hide it under the table. But they, uh, buffet rules, uh, my, my wife is like, unapologetically, will he per plate as high as it can go? And I think that's the way you've got to do it on a buffet. Yeah. You know, like, I small plate and go back, but it is a mistake.

Yeah. I always realize it's a mistake, especially if there's a key. You know, like... I small play it and go back, but it is a mistake. Yeah. I always realise it's a mistake. Especially if there's a cure. It's a what? It's an honest mistake. Can I get some frost on my shreddies? For those who are acting. Yeah, go. Chinese buffet, and I think that those are different. I've made them a state before where you go, oh, I love these.

And so I put a load on, and I get back to my, and I'm like, because it's a Chinese buffet, they're generally like, this is not a good version of prawn toast or whatever. I've got Chinese buffet. As in, like, and all-you-can-eats. Yeah. But that will always, that will keep getting replenished,

right, and so if anything, you've got your tactics asked about facing them. Yeah. Totally. You should deploy your wedding tactics at a Chinese buffet. But then hold on. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah, absolutely. It's the old saying. Go where to get a Chinese, go Chinese, or where to go? Go Chinese at a wedding. Actually, that's not actually the first I agree I go Dutch on a first date I always go Dutch on a first date Yeah, Chinese are a wedding and go Dutch on a first date Did the Dutch have a face?

The thing is you could if you are a Dutch person who's enjoyed a buffet don't forget to get in contact Please email him Papi's flat share at gmail.com. You could look at it this way, what you're doing is you're getting a little bit of a taste of what's good, and then you go, when I go back. At a Chinese buffet.

At a normal buffet, because what you don't want to do is put five things of something on your plate that you get back. I do agree with that. You got the first one, you go, ah, and then you go, well, that's a waste. You're hiding stuff on there, and also people are going, you go, ah, and then you go, well, that's a waste. You're hiding stuff, and yeah, and also people are going, oh, look,

they've their eyes are too big of that. Yeah, you know, they're bigger than their stomach. I went to a buffet and I got a big, big lump of cheese. You look like a sort of cheese with chives in it. Yeah. Like, big whack off lump on the plate. Beautiful. First thing I did, bit into it was butter.

Yeah, it's good to say. I really fucked that last week. I was, my friend Berkitt do that. Ben sisters wedding and it's... You saw it happening. You watched him at the cheese board. I up this... What do you see?

Get to see a live punking. It took a big, big slice, the size of a cheese slice, brought it back, put it on top of a crack a bit into it I saw the whole thing play out Absolutely delightful whisper is here, but that is isn't it? Yeah Said you keep eating it was like yeah Yeah, I've got to May I don't mind it though. You got a finish you better but big bit of butter. I mean essentially kind of what cheese is

is it? Is it? It's been a ton. I'll be seeing it. I can see the mics going up to every corner. Yeah. Cheese is out there. It's cheese butter, because my wife thinks cheese and butter

are the same thing, which is why if we have a cheese sandwich, you'll never have butter in the bread. It's a clockier wife. Did I say my wife? A mint clockier. Third bread. It's my wife. My wife, a mint block. That's happened today. No, Charlie thinks she says if I'm going to have a cheese sandwich, no butter on it, because and I quote, they're the same thing.

Let's find out. Producer Emma. Well, they're made from the same ingredients, but they're different process. So cheese is like fermented, well, cheese has got rennet in it, hasn't it? And some of the parmesan. We were looking for more authority there, Emma. I think this is it.

Or our fact checker, and you came out that with like, is it kind of, is it fermented? But the word fermented is the one I'm not sure. Because fermented more is alcohol, like. Is there alcohol at cheese? Ooh, it's nice. No, no, no, no, don't email in. Right.

Boos cheese. I would love to have some booze cheese. Is that, is that Clarkies DJ name? DJ Booze cheese. I come on straight after. You play a bit of Chesney Hawks, you're pissed out your mind. DJ Booze cheese, Vengebusters coming. I love it. DJ booze cheese.

DJ booze cheese delivers as well, like two hours of music, whereas Daddy Errors is very much the novelty. Daddy Errors. I'm sorry, for 50 quid in the buffet, you're throwing good money after bad. Clark, he's willing to do it for the bar. Yeah, but the problem is you have to pick up his bar.

That's the problem. That's the problem. You have to pick up the booze tab. When you've booked DJ booze cheese, you're paying for his bar tab. Yeah, and it's always surprisingly high. I tell you what... That is DJ booze.

DJ surprisingly high is me who's just eating the load of frosty his with their DNA. I've got frosty his... DJ surprisingly high. Too early for surprisingly high. He's struggling to find the stage. To deliver that in. He's got his arms round DJ Boos Cheese.

He's telling you much he loves him. LAUGHTER I know I don't always show it, DJ Boos Cheese, but you are a good-looking man. LAUGHTER What a bill. What a strong bill. A strong bill.

He's the booker. DJ's... DJ Strong Bill. DJ Strong Bill. DJ Strong Bill is actually a pelican who has learned how to DJ. What? He keeps his... I thought I was the only novelty actor on the bill. He keeps his records in the little floppy bit of his of his beak.

He's a cartoon. No, he's a cartoon. He's a real pelican that we've put records in his beak and because it's a strong. No, he's a cartoon. He's a real, he's a real pelican that we've put records in his beak and because it's a strong bill. Okay. Digest Strong Bill. He's a pelican's bill big enough to fit a record in.

Yes. There it is. Yeah, there it is. Oh my God. What a great gift. Now. Ah. How do they make bread with no wheat in?

How do they make bread with no wheat in? How do they make bread with no wheat in? How do they make bread with no wheat in? How do they make bread with no wheat in? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha non-stop bunkers brilliance. I love that. Poor things. It's like the theaters of December 15th. I'm not 100% with Charlie on that, but I will say that. By the way, 100% with Charlie is what DJs are probably the highest. He is on. Yeah. But my partner does. She puts butter and mayonnaise on some sandwiches, and I always think that's crazy.

I think it's one or the other. I think mayo on sandwiches, mayo, this idea that we need mayo on sandwiches is absolutely the, it's the... Mayo on sandwiches, my favourite podcast. I mean, it really is that. Okay, mayo on sandwiches. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's an absolute treat. Mayo on sandwiches. Take a very seriously. It is the death knell of the buffet. What? A cheese sandwich with mayo. What the fucking hell are you playing at your dark cunt? I put mayo in pretty much every sandwich I make. Are you joking?

No, not at all. Mayo and mustard. I've mustard is fine. Oh, mayo. It's too strong. I don't like it. Mayo is going into my sandwiches. I'm not on mayo. There we go. I don't like it. Mayo is going into my sandwiches. I'm not on my own. There we go.

I don't like mayo. There's a clear divide on these pockets. I don't like mayo. Oh no. I like cold. I don't like cold. So yeah, I would never, never in a million years. Oh, butter and mayo in a sandwich.

Will you? Butter, mayo. Really? Sometimes I'll just mayo, but sometimes I'll butter it mayo. What kind of sandwich we're talking here? You're making me a sandwich, Paré. Am I? I'm coming to your house.

Okay. You're making me a sandwich. Yes. What's your like? I mean, if there's a bit of salad going into the sandwich, then you're definitely getting mayo. You think it's a breakfast sandwich, which is probably my favourite type of sandwich, then you're not going to have mayo in there. That's fair. I wouldn't put. You're not putting mayo in a breakfast sandwich, which is probably my favorite type of sandwich. Then you're not gonna have mayo in the sandwich.

That's fair. I wouldn't put, you're right. So you're not putting mayo in a bacon sandwich, you're not putting mayo in a sausage sandwich, you're not putting mayo in an egg sandwich. I think that's all fair enough. Would you put, in an egg sandwich, you put like chili jam.

In an egg sandwich, no way. What are you putting in an egg sandwich? I'm not a big fan of the fancy stuff. What are you putting in the egg sandwich? Egg and that's it. Egg butter. Egg butter. Egg butter.

Egg butter. Oh. Oh, I'm a big butter. I mean, that's almost as good as booze cheese. I think booze cheese is better than egg butter. By a long fucking short plate. But let's have a booze. Let's have a booze.

Let's have a twitch bowl. Would you rather have booze cheese or egg butter? It's going out to the nation. Is there egg in butter? Excuse me? No, I don't think so. OK. So what do you want?

Booze cheese or egg butter? You've got to have one of the two. It's got to be booze cheese. Who are these lunatics picking egg butter? I'll be honest with you, both of them sound extremely appealing to me. Really? Yes. They're making me feel really hungry.

I'm a dairy kind of guy. I love dairy. Have you ever tried to be vegan? I know you're vegetarian. Have you ever tried the vegan? No, I've never tried to be vegan. And increasingly, you kind of know that you should be giving it a go. Yes.

But I just don't want to. Yeah. I might do vegan. What's vegan? I've never been told about that before, but vegans eat egg. Right. OK. And nothing else.

Nothing else. You're going to be absolutely bound, mate. Vegans, vegans eat eggs. But don't you own any of that animal prodgies. So that's kind of one way to go. It's one way to go, yeah. Yeah, I mean that's, yeah, so you're cutting out all the cattle farming, dairy farming type types,

don't have no cheese. Boos cheese is out. You can do booze vegan cheese. Booze vegan cheese. Yeah. Let's catch your title. Vegan booze vegan cheese. Booze vegan cheese. Yeah. Let's cut your title. Yeah. Vegan booze cheese? Oh, hello.

A couple of the words around. This is why we do this. We've got a workshop these ideas. We can't just launch them to the public. Good point. DJ Vegan booze cheese. A buffet must admit as a veggie is one of the most. He said musted.

There's only a few places. Have you ever worn a mustard net? What? It's a glove full of mustard. There's only a few places. Have you ever worn a mustard net? What? It's a... It's a glove full of mustard. Oh, no. Have you?

No. I'm sorry, I think I've got it in saying we're tongue-gurled. I'm going to eat a banana. A buffet is one of the places that I do miss. I feel like I miss out being a veggie. There's not a lot of places, like in a curry house, I don't, in a Chinese, I don't. The two places I really feel being a veggie

is fish and chip shop and buffet. Well, buffet is a wedding. The two times I've broken my pescatarian, I don't eat meats, but the two times I've broken that have been accidentally at the two, the last two buffets I've been to. Because one, the chicken nuggets were labeled as vegetarian. I took a bite into them and I was like, this is definitely not a vegetarian chicken nugget. This is great. And next to them was some meatballs.

Took a bite into that. Oh, two for two. So I had chicken nugget and meatballs. I... You know, nugget and meatballs. You don't want to be a meatballs? What was that? It feels like meatballs, you shouldn't know what was coming there. No, but the thing is plant-based meat substitutes

are very, very accurate now. Especially if you don't taste meat a lot, but I tasted it and went, oh no, that's definitely meat. And then the next buffet I went to, spring rolls. You always take a gamble on spring rolls. My brother was eating it and he was like, oh no, these are veggie. So I ate one, I was like,

I think that's chicken, he's like, oh yeah, it might be chicken. So, there we go. Yeah, that's the gamble. It's tricky for a buffet, it's tricky for a veggie. And you're right, you do miss out on the good stuff.

I once went to a wedding with a hog roast and the only veggie option was an apple sauce bap. I was at that wedding. There you go. I remember it very, very well. Apple sauce bap. You have the same thing that everyone else is having with the meat taken out, which is what a lot of people think vegetarian food is. Just, you know, that's not fair. I actually quite enjoyed my apple sauce bap. Oh, there we go. The Apple source bag. The Apple source bag was nice, but not a filling enough meal for a day when you didn't spend most of the time drinking.

That's the problem. So you've got to want you to pop some booze cheese in there. You're really waiting for the cheese board to come out. You always see the veggies at a wedding. Whenever the extra stuff comes out, around half past 10, they always see the, you always see the veggies at a wedding, whenever the extra stuff comes out, you know, around Half-Post 10, they always rinse it because they've not been glinted quite enough. That goat's cheese tart, not quite enough. That's the problem. Yep.

If you have an wedding, clarky any plans? No sir. Er, emmer any plans? No. Well, we're already married, so it's no good here. You went pasties. That's classic. Yes, pasties and food vans pasties and food vans food increasing our food is such a good Like a good band van a

Pizza van and a fish and chip on great Two three and two. We'll go to both Yeah, they're not counting. Yes, they were that lots of lots of They're not counting? Yes, they were. Lots of, lots of, lots of, they were. Were they counting? Did you get done? No, no, I didn't. But yeah, one of them wanted to leave and they were like,

You can't leave. People are still eating. Yeah. I was like, no one's paying though. I was like, yeah, I said, pre-paid for it. You can't just leave. The guy didn't, the guy didn't understand the arrangement. It was just like, I've had enough. It's like, no mate, we haven't. Bloody.

Well, fishing chips, please. The metal four in the morning. That's what it feels like, doesn't it? It feels like clark is slightly going away from him. It's slightly going to ransom. Was that pizza or fish and chips? That was fish and chips. Oh, come.

I tell you what this is. Peace guy, it's a lid. This is the thing with fish and chips. Fish and chips. That was Fish and chips. Oh, come. I don't know. I tell you what this is. Peace, guys, it's a lid. This is the thing with fish and chips. Fish and chipshops, right? Now, fish and chipshops close so early. Don't they? They close at the same time, normal shops close. I always found the weird thing with fish and chipshops.

Close at lunchtime. Did they? Yeah. They're like, close and then don't reopen to like four or something. So if you can't have fish and chips a lunch a lot a lot places It's a magic to a good fish and chips shop. Oh my god I feel like a special place of fish and chips. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, like there's an or it's not like anywhere else And there's like a special aura to it obviously like the

smell of characters It's bad and there's a real fucking... Our fish and chip shop, right? They've just replaced the classic signs with TV screens that... Like a McDonald's, basically. Oh, OK. With screens that... So, if you walk in,

the screen sort of changes all the time. A different thing comes up is that you can also buy a fried chicken here or maybe have a Savaloi. So, all I want to know is is how much does cod and chips cost? We have to wait. We have to wait for it to go round. To go round. It's like if you're at a train station, it's on, you know, number page two of the two pages. The teletext is my stop there.

If I got banned, if I got banished, if it was like old school banished yet from the United Kingdom. Okay. I think that's the thing I would miss the most. I don't know, you get it anywhere else. That a British chippy. That's like, I think it's the biggest thing I'd miss. Have you ever been to, you know?

Not a family. You know? Not my friends. Not my wife. A good old fashioned chippy. Banish, banished, what do you think you've done to be banished? Well, I mean, it's not being a good enough husband's son's and friend. So it's tarp that you said, the chippy again.

It's not been home for weeks. Smell, home, I live in a chippy again. Whoa! It's not been home for weeks. The smell, home. I live in a chippy. You live in a chippy. You live in a great, though. We used to go to our auntie's house. That was the only time we'd have fish and chips. But every time we went, we had fish and chips.

So it made going really exciting and special. It was a really clever trick, I think, by my parents, because otherwise it wouldn't have been so much fun, but it was like, we're going to Auntie's house, we're going to get our fish and chips, we lose our minds. I mean, I did a gig last year with our friend, Joey Page, and he said, look, Perry, I need someone to do this gig with me, it's in deal.

He said, look, it's a terrible gig. It's really weird. The audience are really weird. Next door is the best fish and chips you'll ever have it's a terrible gig. It's really weird. Yeah. The audience are really weird. Next door is the best fish and chips you'll ever have. I took the gig. Yeah, I mean, it's... And he said, like, it's his third time of doing it. He said, I never really have a good time at the gig,

but, oh, the fish and chips. And it's like, already, in my head, I'm like, I'd go back and do deal. Really fucking good chips, huh? Absolutely. We would always struggle to sell in Bath, but my God, the burger place over the road from the... Oh, yeah.

The burger place over the road from the Rondo. We never really had an audience there. We had one night we played in Bath, and we thought, oh my God, it's a full house. And it's because they sold all the tickets to like a group of foreign exchange, who didn't speak any English. So that's a a two-hour

comedy show. In another length of a lot of the laughter where they find something funny that would normally a crowd would particularly go with largely our humiliation. I think it's a bit of a thing they found funny. But it was the best reception we ever got at the end of the gig. I lost it outside. I lost it outside again. To give us a round of applause. As we've released the burger place. Chase the car. Yeah. They waited for us. We're all stood outside, we're all stood outside again. To give us a round of applause. And they've chased the burger place. They've got our burgers, sat in the car, started to drive off, and they'll chase the car down the street. Shouting rich fonts. I don have been. So, but yeah, very much so, our gig coming up at the Moth Club. Of course, the FAB. I said, do you want to come to the, do you want to do a gig at the Moth Club?

And you said, yes, because there's a nice vegan fish and chip shop next door. And fried chicken, there's two, yeah. So you're doing, what's- I'm going to do the dubbler. What you're going to do before- What's your pre-m you're gonna do, what's your pre-fishing chips? Pre-fishing chips. Now I was fining fish and chips too heavy as a pre. Yes, but you're prioritizing the gig.

Yeah. But it's like, I don't wanna finish the night on a big fish and chips, I wanna finish the night on a really nice vegan chicken burger. Yeah, yeah. So the gig will suffer, but it's good food. Come along with you guys. Come along. You've got to see a flat shell slam down live, especially when

Perry has a full belly. And beef fare when you do. Beef fare in 2020 guys, you've got to be fair. Yeah. I've said it once before but it bears a release. Well there we go. There we go. If you've been affected by any of the issues in today's podcast, don't forget to email us at pappiesflatshareitgmail.com.

And I guess we'll have to do a Twitter poll. What would you prefer egg butter or booze cheese? The big question. It's the biggest question that's ever been asked in the past. We're not afraid of the big questions, and we continue to do so. We're not afraid to tackle the thorny issues of the day. Do you want booze cheese? Do you want egg butter?

And you can... Let us know your choice by going on iTunes and leaving us a review. Five stars will do it. Yes. And then just simply two words, booze cheese or egg butter. Perfect. It is the most important vote in recent history. So just slip on the five stars and then let us know.

Absolutely right. Yeah, and don't forget we've got the live show coming up on the third of February. Do come along and see us there. That should be good fun. And most of all, have a wonderful time, whatever you get up to this week. Be fair, I think.

Be fair in 2020. Be fair in 2020. We've got to be fair in 2020. Be fair in 2020, guys. And this episode was produced by the wonderful EmmaCouple. Corsum team! Corsum team? Cheers everyone!

Bye! Ladies and gentlemen please be upstanding for the whole... The Patreon neighborhood water Oh! Boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop I'm on my own but face the fact some happen because I'm not with Jane Jackson Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack

Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack

Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I'm playing football gonna score some goals That's good, that's good, that's good That's good, that's good, that's good That's good, that's good, that's good That's good, that's good, that's good That's good, that's good, that's good

That's good, that's good, that's good That's good, that's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good

That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good

That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good That's good, that's good I'm hangin' out with Catriona Anglin. You're the man with a bag of dunga dunga. I'm gonna go to the lose, sit on the can. That's because I'm with Harry Seyban. I'm gonna drop a dab, dab, dab, dab, and that concludes this week's Neighborhood Watcher More Call. I'm gonna drop a bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop.

Didn't play to your strengths that one, Clark. No, do you know what? I thought that actually was our strongest one we've ever done. Certainly for two of us. Certainly for, no, you know what? I thought Clarkie did a lovely job. And as a result, I'd love to hear them again. Clarkie.

Are you a bad boy? You're a bad boy. You're a bad boy. You're a bad boy. You're a bad boy. You're a bad boy. You're a bad boy. You're a bad boy.

You're a bad boy. You're a bad boy. I think we're okay to say. Bap ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ba, ding ba, ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, ding ba, and spectacularly entertaining. A woman plotting her course to freedom at a lot more. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Poor things. It's like theaters December 15th.