Pappy's Flatshare - House Meeting (Ceilidhs) S13E14

Episode Date: May 8, 2023

Matthew, Ben and Tom slide into your ear canal for another house meeting. We've nearly finished the jigsaw, but we're missing the pieces with the tambourine and Titanic on themPappy’s - https://twit...ter.com/pappystweetPappy's Insta - https://www.instagram.com/pappyscomedy/Support us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareFind tickets to all our live shows here - pappyscomedy.com/liveEdited by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Do you want to start? What is this? This is... Alright, well... It sounded like you've just been woken up, like you're sort of a rip-down uncle there. What is this? Who are you? Well, I'll tell you now, Clarky, and we may as well tell the listeners, this is an episode
Starting point is 00:00:26 of House Meeting. So, welcome everybody, welcome. Greetings indeed, listener dear. I mean, I would say there's got a lot of people will be saying what is this throughout the episode. So, at least you got ahead of the curve, Clarkie, and you got in first. What is this? What is this, we're up to?
Starting point is 00:00:49 It's all good stuff, though. I can tell you that. Now, it's a house meeting. Now, as you know, if you've been listening to the last few house meetings, we recorded all of these quite quick succession just before Tom went away on assignment and so this is like the furthest amount of time between recording and recording the intro. I asked Korsh to send me a little message about what the sort of things that get covered in it. I don't do too many spoilers. No, of course, but we talk about Kaylee's oh
Starting point is 00:01:27 Yeah, I remember that okay There you go. It's it's all clicked into place. Yeah So yeah, so welcome to the episode everybody as we say Tom is in this episode He's just not here on the intro. It's only I'm here on the intro on the intro. That's Clark is brought. Where am I? Help me. Clark is at a big bank holiday week. What have you done this bank holiday week and Clarky? Just, you know, the usual visiting and visiting the bank. Sorry, sorry, sorry, the usuals. This has not been a usual bank holiday. This has been the King's Coronation. Oh, well, of course, I've been pledging allegiance. Of course you have, yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:10 And you know what, Lister, you can pledge allegiance to us by joining our Patreon. Clarkey, that was absolutely teetering on the precipice of professionalism. That was amazing. Oh, wow, right. Yeah, and a very good way of covering that you can't remember what you did yesterday. Very good way of knowing what you even noticed.
Starting point is 00:02:34 Oh, you know, the usual thing you do on a coronation. You know me. So we had a street party for our street. Yeah, which was really good fun. I obviously got up on the ones and twos around the kids disco, had a good time doing that, which was really good. Oh brilliant. I really, really enjoyed it. And then afterwards, as kind of the kids were going to bed, the sun was going down, the street lights were coming on, everybody had a nice chat about how much they don't
Starting point is 00:03:07 and not bothered about the monarchy. LAUGHTER You know, they was good. It was a bit like someone having a birthday party and at the end of it, everyone gets in, huddles in the corner and slags the person off who's having the birthday party. I mean, be told of my birthday party, sir.
Starting point is 00:03:21 LAUGHTER It's a really funny thing. I don't think it was quite the spirit of the... Just keeps shouting, what's going on? What is this? That was your last surprise birthday party, wasn't it? You were just there like Abe Simpson. What's going on?
Starting point is 00:03:40 What's going on? But yeah, so I hope everybody had a wonderful coronation weekend and I hope that this helps you get through, because obviously there's a huge come down after a big bank holiday weekend. Oh, you're telling me. But it's a short week. That's the thing with them.
Starting point is 00:04:00 Like last week, we had one last week as well. Yeah, I know. I was like, good God, it's Friday. Yeah, what that means is I haven't got enough time to do my work. Ah, that's right. That is the most important thing for different people, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:04:17 We've all got different priorities. What is work? What is this? I mean, every day is the weekend for you. So every week is a short week. Yeah, absolutely. And if you do have lots of work, consider hiring me. Get in touch with Clarkies. He's always available. And very good. Very good, very good. Very good, very good. Very talented. Very talented man. You know, he's a fantastic actor. He can do different characters.
Starting point is 00:04:53 He's a very, very good writer, very good sketch writer. Get a Clarkie. Get a Clarkie for your next project. Absolutely. I know there are people out there listening to this thinking, we've got this project, who are we going to crew up? Don't go for the obvious names, go for Clarky. I mean, not the, you know, sorry, that sounded,
Starting point is 00:05:11 that sounded more like, didn't sound like, that wasn't what I intended, Clarky. You know, just think outside the box, go, why go for the tried and tested? Why go for the massively untested Benedict Clark? The once tested in around 2008, but the test didn't go exactly as planned. Anyway, listen, there's enough of that, this is a very fun episode and I hope you enjoy it. And if you do, why don't leave us a review,
Starting point is 00:05:46 but most of all, just to see if you can work out, what is this? As you listen to another episode of Pappies, Flat Share, house meeting. I've had a thought. I've got an issue. I've got a question I want to ask you. I want to talk. I want a chat. Okay, let's sit down and chew the fat. Has meeting. What temperature should we set the heat to? Has meeting.
Starting point is 00:06:16 Why on earth am I always waiting? Has meeting. Who went my bed while I was sleeping? This has a husband meeting. What's the point? Does life have a meeting? So you know jigsaws. Do you explain how jigsaws, yeah? Are we talking about the, are we talking about the stores or the puzzles? The puzzles? The puzzles, yeah, yeah, I know both, but yeah, just want to do it. Let's be honest, Paige.
Starting point is 00:06:39 Is it the most successful, in terms of as puzzles go? Yeah. It's number one with a bullet right, as far as I'm aware. As opposed to, for example, like the blocks that you assemble or... Yeah. Or what? Like what the alternative is that it's beating? Well, I think that's why it's such a market leader.
Starting point is 00:07:05 LAUGHTER I suppose that's it. Yeah. It's the only one of its kind. Yeah, like, it feels a bit like Mr. Jigsaw might have been like the apple of his day. Because it's pretty all conquering, isn't it, the Jigsaw? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, I've got a, yeah. Just, yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:25 I've got a few questions. Okay, go on. Is there a rule that for a jigsaw to be known as a jigsaw, like champagne has to come from the champagne region? Are there official jigsaws? And then it has to be cut by a jigsaw. Well, or like, is it a trademark? Is jigsaw like a trademark thing?
Starting point is 00:07:44 Oh, it's a good question. I don't, I don't know. I don't know the answer to that. The only thing I would think of is a jigsaw has to be testulating pieces, right? That's what that's the only thing that I think constitutes a jigsaw, right? You can't just cut up a picture and then go there you go. I think, or can you though? Can you though? Can you though?
Starting point is 00:08:06 Yeah, can I? Can you cut up a picture and make a Jigsaw? I think is it good enough present from others day? No. I've cut up a picture of me and you. Is it the present? Jigsaw? I've cut up a picture of me and you
Starting point is 00:08:22 and I've put it in this 1399 water bottle. But there's like a standard, like when you think of a Jigsaw piece, there's like a certain design. There's a beautiful design shape to a Jigsaw piece that kind of makes it feel more official. I don't know. Yeah, no, I do know what you're getting at. But I unfortunately don't know the answer who who came up with the first jigsaw and whether it's a patented like whether it's like Hoover, whether it's the brand name and everything else we're just
Starting point is 00:08:56 calling a you know we're calling a positive jigsaw. And we're going back right, we're going back a couple of hundred. Two tenies. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What was the first jigsaw? What a happy question. What, and was it two tenies ago? I've just invented a period of time there beside the right and there. Could be two tenies ago? If you told me the first jigsaw was like 5,000 years old, I'm not, I won't be entirely surprised. No, I don't, you mean you mean you? But then what are you, wait, what are they putting together? Yeah, what's the good point?
Starting point is 00:09:35 What you cutting up and what you cutting it with? Because surely, like, surely jigsaw is named after the saw, right? Yeah, I think so. But the saw named after the puzzle. But that could be the hero element. Exactly, yeah. Yeah. It's a bit like if you're playing paper rock scissors,
Starting point is 00:09:56 it's like which one is defeating the other. If you're playing Jigsaw Jigsaw, it's a harder game to play Jigsaw Jigsaw. It is. It's not a popular game. It's not as popular as jigsaw jigsaw it's a harder game to play jigsaw jigsaw It's not a popular game. It's not popular as jigsaw puzzles. No, no, no, no, no, the spin-off game Jigsaw, I've created based on jigsaw's Not as popular jigsaw launched a few products back in the day They have their puzzle then they had jigsaw jigsaw the game the entertainment sport
Starting point is 00:10:21 They were trying to get off the ground think quite work Have you ever had a sauce or movies? Oh my god, yeah. Well, it depends how long you jig for. You do for a certain amount of time, you know. Every time I go to a wedding game, that was all jig. Kaley are wedding and then about after 40 minutes, the throbbing headache, the surrealisation that you're chafing, you've got my grain.
Starting point is 00:10:44 You've Kiled too hard. The last cailed, I really remember this being such a issue was. I'm so excited about this. I like the fact that it implies that you've had plenty of cailed, you're so out of it you can't remember. You've had a few synths that are just completely blanked from your minds. Well, the last one that you really remember, Ben Wainfield put us in the okay, did I, Kayleigh? Oh, don't see, don't know. Oh, see, no. I, at your mum's 60th Matthew. Oh yeah, I went into the, I went fully invested.
Starting point is 00:11:40 Early doors. You got to, you've got to. And there you go. And there you go. You're enthusiastic, Kayleigh. I couldn't stop the perfume sweat. And I would go outside and just stand for like 10 minutes. But it just wouldn't stop. But also I wanted to carry on calying. You have to go to basically dry yourself out.
Starting point is 00:12:02 Try and dry yourself out. Yeah. So the last time I went to a cal basically dry yourself out, try and dry yourself out. Yeah. So the last time I went to a cave, I had to give myself a rule, song on, song off. Just to try. And the energy levels fine, but sweat levels through the roof. You've had, you have to bring a towel as well, don't you? When with a, show up with a little towel to mock yourself down after every jig or real. When one of those sweats arrive that is like a problem sweat, there's nothing worse.
Starting point is 00:12:33 To get trapped into a problem sweat. Done for? Because in itself the fact that you are sweating makes you sweat. That's it. Megan will start saying to me calm down, you're making That's it. Meggernaut starts saying to me, calm down. You're making yourself sweat more. I'm like, calm down. When someone tells you to calm down.
Starting point is 00:12:50 No, also, yeah, absolutely. That is only going to exacerbate the flop, isn't it? Oh. Somebody is there saying, listen, calm yourself down. You're sweating all over this christening. You're panicking and it's making you sweat more. Exactly. Oh no, it's not sweet.
Starting point is 00:13:08 Oh yeah. God, there's nothing worse than being told to calm down. Like no one ever wants to be told to calm down. Yeah. It's one of the most mortifying things that can happen to a person. It's in real life. Your energy level, whatever it is, is odds with everybody else's. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:28 And there's no, your response is never like, okay, yeah. The other person's thought is always, I have a calm, which is a way of, you know, either I am calm or I can't calm down, neither of them cover you in glory. Both of you in sweat. I can't.
Starting point is 00:13:48 I can't. Have you got any tactics for listeners dear, right there, as someone who's had run-ins with the problem sweats? No. What's your war? Where are your key areas? That's the big question.
Starting point is 00:14:02 What are your key sweat areas? Obviously you've got the forehead. When I go off, when I start sweating proper, it is, I swear it is like a tap from a day before. It's a day before. It's a day before. Yeah, it just feels like no. It's just trying, it's like rat from a sinking ship,
Starting point is 00:14:19 you know, it's just like the Moong Street is just trying to get out any way possible. Yeah, yeah, it's it's it's almost I was The opposite of this of rat from a sinking ship It's obviously the sea onto a boat as the ship sinking It's like yeah moisture moisture coming from Moistures wants to be a rat wants to be around you. How do you heard about it?
Starting point is 00:14:43 This this is a, a theatrical technique, but it only really obviously works for a certain area of the body, which is the, if you're wearing a suit on stage and you don't want to have sweat patches in the armpits, the sanitary towel. Have you heard about that? There's sometimes in the theatrical production, so in a sanitary towel into the armpits of the suits, so you don't
Starting point is 00:15:09 have big old distracting dark patches, you know, like you're a supply teacher. Oh wow, yeah. I think what I would need is a suit made entirely out of sanitary pads. And then by the end of it, you look like the, you look like the Michelin man. Tom Pond suddenly knows, Tom Pond in your ears, a sandwich tail suit. You've got your Kaylee outfit. The best advice I was ever given was go to the toilet cold water on your wrists. Yes, that's it.
Starting point is 00:15:51 Your pulse points. On your point, if you can cool it down. Cools your blood and I'm sure that. Yeah. I don't know if that's real, but feels good. All do yourself a can of coke or something and put your pulse points on the can of coke. Wait a second, you're right down.
Starting point is 00:16:10 How can I pop a pulse point into a can of coke? No, no, no, no, you put your wrist on either side of a cold drink, but yeah, yeah, that's good. Run cold water. Yeah, that's what you want to do. Yeah. I think it'll happen sweating. Because of Kaylees.
Starting point is 00:16:30 Oh yeah, that's right. Kaylees do have a similar energy to it, like how I imagine an illegal rave must have felt. Ha ha ha. Back in the early 90s. There's like a raw energy that kind of envelops everyone. Like suddenly, be you 9 or 70, you're suddenly just, you become some kind of whirling dervish and you kind of lose control. Like, I've seen very responsible, you know, grand parents take out grand children,
Starting point is 00:17:10 just like wipe them off their feet, bang, down on the floor, and just carry on, just like, absolutely slaves to the rhythm. Yeah, it takes over, doesn't it? It does. It does, they're magical. Yeah, and you have to be kind of like... Absolutely, okay of like... Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:17:26 ...intense relationships forged in the heat of a K-L-E. Like, you'll suddenly, like, get paired up with, you know, I don't know, your mom's mate who you've only met once before, but three songs in and you're like, I could run off with this woman and we could live together in Portugal. You just think like, we've formed this fierce and loyal bond now. And you know, like it's like, and you see them go to other partners
Starting point is 00:17:52 and you wait and come back and then it's like, yeah, we know what we're doing. And then after the Kaley's gone, it's like some weird affair that happened in the midst. It's basically, it's that, we It's basically, we should actually explain, you actually shagged you. You found that one. It was a weird affair that happened in the midst of a caily,
Starting point is 00:18:13 it was in the midst of a caily. All bets are off. There were no rules to a caily. I thought they were too swinging each other, they're not even linked by the arms. It's how it feels a bit like the purge. If a murder took place in the middle of the cailing, the detectives would show up and be like,
Starting point is 00:18:38 that's a cailing guy. That's a cailing all the way. There's nothing we can do, he can't touch it. Oh, we were cailing at the time. There are actually cailing laws, which means we just can't deal with it. Yeah, it's like seeking sanctuary, you know? Like, it's illegal loophole. If it's happening within a caley.
Starting point is 00:18:55 But there is also as well, I think you're right. There is that intensity of the people that you're paired up with that you've got a spinner, you know, because there is that bit where they'll just go, and now you all spin each other round. And it's, you know that you've got a spinner, because there is that bit where they'll just go, and now you all spin each other round, and it's, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, and you're all, you've got your hands crossed over and then you're obviously a can of cope
Starting point is 00:19:12 between your pulse points. Yeah. Your hands crossed over, spinning each other around, really, really going for it, but then when it is over, in the same way that it must have been like back in those illegal raves, it gets to sort of two, three, four, five in the morning, the sun's coming up.
Starting point is 00:19:30 But you look at each other going, I felt like, you know, hours ago, I felt like I knew you're very soul. Now who are you? Yeah. You know, the post, the post-calie come down. I would say this as well, take the Kaly scene out of the Titanic. They don't fall in love. I think that's so true. Yeah. But do they hear an eye-spoke? I don't think it does because in the film, the guy who's supposed to be on the lookout
Starting point is 00:19:58 looks at them instead, doesn't he? And then he's suddenly like, oh, iceberg. That's a K-Lie sandwich. That's a Titanic. It's the Devil's Dance. It's the Devil's Dance. Yeah. Yeah. It's a bit like, you know, obviously, you know, the lambada is the forbidden dance, but the K-Lie is the Devil's Dance.
Starting point is 00:20:19 And people blamed, you know what, this is the thing. People blamed rock and roll, you know, an Elvis's wanted hips. You're back in your day, for corrupting our youth. Meanwhile, they're not, you know, getting, getting, caling to the heart's content in a church hall somewhere. And exactly.
Starting point is 00:20:38 Is the caling, among the teeny-boppers, is the caling like the most exercise I've ever done? No, why does it make me sweat so much? like, the most exercise I've ever done? No. Why does it make me sweat so much? It's the fucking fire and brimstone, man. Exactly. It's a healthy, in the floor. He's taking the floor.
Starting point is 00:20:53 It's closer. It's taking you closer to the dark, Lord BL's above. I think we've crossed out here. I think we have. I'm not gonna stop doing, I'm not gonna stop being the Kaylee's out there. Well, if anything, I want to do one sooner. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:07 Should do the first ever podcast, Kaylee. I think. Would you okay, they wouldn't be the same over Zoom. I mean, Kaylee's, the Kaylee was the saddest, the saddest thing that happened. You lost by the pandemic heart. Every Saturday night on to the zoo we go for our Kaylee. Just wasn't the same.
Starting point is 00:21:26 Go off into a breakoff room with your partners. Grab your partner, break off rooms. Do you do K-Lay to the very healthy, Jimmy? Chasing my mom's friend around the room. I think it's really good news for us. You can't see the hand gesture Tom just did while you're doing that, Chase. You know what it is. It would be totally acceptable. It was acceptable in the K-least.
Starting point is 00:22:04 But totally acceptable in the Klee. But, that was acceptable in the Klee. Unacceptable. 9.30 in the morning, chatting on a Zoom. That's a big, big, big thing. Goat impressions. Let's hear bleeding. I'll hear you. Oh dear.
Starting point is 00:22:21 Erm, yeah. So, um, gone. Well, so gone. Well, I was going to say mid when he really made me laugh then Tom. I farted and I'm glad I'm glad we're on a Zoom right now. The benefit of the Kaley is though you'd have moved away from that instantly. Yeah, I mean, the amount of stuff that must get emitted really blows out the cobwebs, doesn't it, so. You would have swung some poor unsuspecting eight-year-old boy into the very fog of it, wouldn't you?
Starting point is 00:22:51 No. You would have seen some poor kid being like spun around, not even knowing what was ahead of him. That's the other good thing about a Kaylee is, it's all ages, right? There's something very delightful about it being, like, you know, grannies on the dance floor, your nieces and nephews are on the dance floor,
Starting point is 00:23:09 everybody's going for it. Yeah. Everybody can Kayley. But it imputes everyone with the same energy of a nine-year-old who's had too much sugar. That's right. Yeah. Everyone loses their fucking minds. The things that Kayley band must have seen, that guy with the old tambourine drum,
Starting point is 00:23:25 tambour what they call it, like the dot tambour. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or a East Breastee in the living room. Yeah, yeah, yeah. East stealing the living, that guy. He's stealing the living, that guy. He's stealing the living, that guy. Easy life in the band now.
Starting point is 00:23:37 I'll tell you what, when you see one of those people in a band, you know they must have a fucking great personality cause they're only there for the, you know, for what they bring to the minibus and the dressing room. I think, God, they are absolutely, anyone could do that. I can't even do the dung, I'm going to the bum bum bum bum. I can't even do the dung bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum I went and saw Elton John. Oh! Absolutely amazing. Still really brilliant. Really fantastic.
Starting point is 00:24:07 Oh my God, he's still standing. It was, it was a phenomenal show. Yeah, amazing. Also as well, they sent you an email beforehand telling you exactly when he's coming on stage and then exactly when he's leaving the stage. Brilliant, that's exactly what you want. I've never had that before.
Starting point is 00:24:22 Just before it happens. Two days before it happens. I thought you went during the gig. He comes out and goes, I'll come in a second, but do check your email. The one we've got is E-L-T-O-N, but the O is a zero. The E is a three.
Starting point is 00:24:40 Yeah. But yeah. He's always going to be leaving, no? No, I'll come for it to you. and yeah, but yeah. Oh, he's gonna be leaving, no. No, I'll come through to you. Yeah, no for it, man. Yeah, he's off. Good, two minutes. Comes on at 730, finishing at 1015.
Starting point is 00:24:53 Nice long show. Does everything you want to hear, it's really fantastic. But what's his last song? His last song is Good By Yellow Brit Road because it's the fairway, yeah, good road. Opens with Benian J closes with a good by yellow bit Oh, yes, please
Starting point is 00:25:08 and Yeah, so but he's got a drummer Yeah, and then he's got a percussionist yeah, and then he's got and it's not a bit It's not a big band otherwise. He's got a bassist guitarist keyboard. It's that's the band. He's obviously playing the piano But he's also playing the piano. But he's also got a guy who is tambourine and vibes, you know. And when he introduces the band, he says, I did a tour with this guy. I did a tour with this guy.
Starting point is 00:25:37 It was just me and him. 1979 when I wanted to get back to the roots of what I first started doing. It was just me and him. You were talking about America together. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, no, in tambourine. And the piano is still doing all of the heavy lifting. As indeed, as indeed of the roadies move in the piano. He carries on in tambourine. But I thought that's the dream gig, isn't it? Because he's there, like he's like, he is really like, he's up on a race to
Starting point is 00:26:03 stay. He's just well this guy above the rest of the band He's got other things like he's got other like bongos and like you know the big the tube in a bell's and that kind of thing But I saw the main work he was doing was on sticking his arms out banging the tambourine and getting people really really going you know and I thought Exactly as you said well must be a laugh, he must be great. He's one of us. He must be a drug dealer, let's be honest.
Starting point is 00:26:31 Oh, my tone's a real place. I say 1979, that was probably true, but I don't. My tambourine guy's gotta come. Okay. Okay. Yeah, no, he has to be there. Just keep him behind. Is that dog sniffing the tambourine case?
Starting point is 00:26:46 Oh, we might keep it the same. Sorry. No, it's just not my number one. He's very important to the same, but let's just keep in the background. No mic on the tambourine, but he has got to be there. He missed the tambourine, and give some drops to be.
Starting point is 00:26:58 Yeah. Oh, no, it was just me and the tambourine touring in 75. Yeah, yeah, yeah, very sparse sound, but the tambourine did have to come, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bro, I tell you what, the tambourine guy knows where the bodies are buried as well. He's like, you're taking me on every tour.
Starting point is 00:27:16 And yes, I'll have my own stage. Yeah, yeah. Oh, a pedestal. Yeah, that sounds good to me, actually, yeah. You know what, after last night, you put another two feet on the plinth. Every incident the plinth gets bigger. The bodies are in the plinth.
Starting point is 00:27:37 Bloody hell, that plinth is heavy and it fucking stinks. Don't look in the plinth. things. Don't look in the blink. I was wondering why did the encore from the Roof of the AT. That's been out I know. Some shit went down between finishing the final song of the set and going back for the encore. Oh, it's strangled another runner. Do you think Alan's gone too soon on the good bye show? In the like I know you've been in the hospital for four years ago, no. If anything, I could have done what we're going to see him before I had kids, that's a race back home.
Starting point is 00:28:16 But I'm concerned he's going to fall into the old early goodbye trap. Yeah, they all do. I thought he'd already done a complicate by Tours. No, he's been doing this farewell, well, the Elebate Road Tour for a long time. Right, that's got in the way. And then he got in it. And then, so what happened was, COVID got in the way.
Starting point is 00:28:34 So I had the tickets to go and see him, like right at the start of, right at the start of COVID, obviously, that didn't happen. Then they rescheduled and it was like 10 days after Sylvie was due to be born and we were like well, we're not gonna see it and then He had a fall Poor love and sent out an email again. Yeah Just check that tambourine
Starting point is 00:28:59 Yeah, and and then he rescheduled it to And then he rescheduled it to April. I loved it. I was absolutely delighted. It was great, it was great. But yeah, I know what you mean, because they're rolling stones. I think they started doing farewell tours. I think if it's like doing farewell tours
Starting point is 00:29:15 in about the same time, Elton John's at the tambourine on the road. And ever since then, I guess you miss two things, don't you? You must miss the adulation, the excitement, I mean, I guess you missed two things, don't you? You must miss the adulation, the excitement, you know, and playing with a live band in front of that many people, because it was, you know, the atmosphere and it was amazing, but also, you must miss the money.
Starting point is 00:29:38 Right, even if you've got loads of money, you must think, well, I could just do another one. Again, you know, you never did a 58 tour. I can make a ton of money. What you're trapped in is that wanting to do a good goodbye, wanting to make it proper. Cause like you don't wanna like, like you said,
Starting point is 00:29:53 like if you had had that fall, I'm like, I'm done now. Yeah. You know, then it would have been like, oh, but I never got to do my goodbye. Everyone must think of doing a good buy show. Yeah. Going out on a high, going out with a bang. So everyone's keen to do my goodbye. Everyone must think of doing a good by show. Going out on a high, going out with a bang. So everyone's keen to do that. But then if you do it too soon, you're suddenly left going, but I've got more in the tank.
Starting point is 00:30:15 Yeah, then you go, but I've done it now. And then there's only so many times you can do that and retain credibility. That's right. That's the same system, you know, before you become the, yeah, the band who cried're saying system. You know, before you become the band who cried farewell tour, exactly. Yeah, you pop up Coke can onto your polls points and you're something like, I can go again. Go again, I've been outside.
Starting point is 00:30:35 My girlfriend's out of word with me. How good to go. I had a little visit with Mr. Tamborine, man. He's sorted me out. We're ready to go. A second win somehow. Just a hint of tamboreen. And I'll be all right. I can understand it.
Starting point is 00:30:56 I can understand every artist wanting the good by gesture. But obviously you don't get to... It's like holding onto your last words. If you hold on too long, then you're gonna end up being like, your last words are gonna be, you know, oh no, rather than to be bold and brave, is great and fine. But then last words, you know, what,
Starting point is 00:31:16 you're not, what your last words were. So, what did you say there? Um, that's gonna be bold and brave, it's great and fine? No, don't hold me to those as my last words. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, because you've said some words since... Since then. Yes, because I have to ask you what did you say. The word that you'd ever say to anyone who has been speaking through their last words.
Starting point is 00:31:38 If you can't say, sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't hear what you said there Pardon Yeah, well anyway, and that's the you know that easy isn't it. It's wanting to go on the gesture Yeah, but you can't go too early. Can you no you can't go too early? Otherwise, then you have to be like, right, well, I've got to completely be quiet now. I've got to have two words of... Bill, was it Bill Hicks? Who did?
Starting point is 00:32:11 Just stopped talking. Oh yeah, because he said he was like, yeah, I said all I need to say. I said all I need to say. Yeah, and just, just stopped talking. My favorite one, I think, is Adam Faith, who said Channel Five's load of shit isn't it? At the teleon. That's iconic. That's really good.
Starting point is 00:32:38 Yeah. That's how you do it. And I'll tell you what ever since since then, he's never been booked. He's never been booked up here on any channel, five shows ever since he died. And I can't help but think that's what the standing in his way. The inventor of the Jigsaw's final words. I mean,. I'm finally at peace. Rest in pieces. Rest in pieces.
Starting point is 00:33:16 Oh, making official. So, find out, well, no, not find out jigsaw question, but are jigsaws in trouble, do you think? No, no. I don't think jigsawsaw question, but are jigsaws in trouble? Do you think? No, no. I don't think jigsaws are everywhere. I'm talking about rude tales. You get to a certain stage and I go, firstly, they're very much that you get them at the first and the seventh age of man, don't you?
Starting point is 00:33:35 Yeah, absolutely. When you're a kid, jigsaws, jigsaws for me, now because jigsaws are getting sort of more complicated for my kids, right? They're getting to be that, you know, we've moved on from the three piece. We're now sometimes at the 24 piece Jigsaw. Are the same with my suits. Yeah. No.
Starting point is 00:33:57 We can't even worry about... I've seen waistcoats. You can't even fit me. I have to put them on in very small and small instruments. You wonder why you're sweating so much. Yeah, I was going to say. I was going to say, Sal and Cheapads to be fair, but.
Starting point is 00:34:09 LAUGHTER I kind of assemble a bit like I and man, I kind of have my shins suit bits and it all goes on in bits. Oh, God, you're shinsuit. That boy can really wear a shinsuit. Yes, he's been more flexibility in the Kaylee. Again, that's the problem.
Starting point is 00:34:26 You rarely go to the cat. Just taking off. You're taking off bits. You know, like those trousers that you can rip off the bottom, they become shorts. You've got the opposite. You can rip off the shorts and they become shin suits. It's a wedding suit. It's a wedding suit.
Starting point is 00:34:42 It's one of your dispassion. It's one of your dispassion. You think, yeah, this have to give it a little of your dispatched mums and you think, yeah, this is going on. The little shorts come on. The shinsuits maintain an air of respectability. The knees are covered. I think we're on something here.
Starting point is 00:34:52 It's a wedding suit that you can take a part bit of so that when you get into the evening do and later on in the day. So you can, in the end, it can be like a short sleeve. Have you invented your removal jacket Tom? What? I wouldn't go that far. What a jacket can you take off, you man? You can put on the back of a chair while you go for a dance. It's a good, it's good.
Starting point is 00:35:18 It's not bad to move. It's not a bad idea. I've said it once before but it bears a repeat. I've said it once before, but it bears a repeat. Hashtag. Oh, that's what it was. Yeah, now you know. Now you get it. Now it's all, now it's all clicking into places, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:35:36 You know, we talked about Elton John and the tambourine man and I think, you know, the Titanic. That's what we do. That sounds like us. That's classic papi, isn't it? It's classic, classic papis. Right, another little shout out for Beefs. If you are, if you're listening to this and you have a beef,
Starting point is 00:35:57 we've got quite a lot of flat share base beefs, but the opening of the remit to include free range beats. Free range beats. Free range beats. We could do with some of those and I'm sure, I'm sure you must have a problem. We're talking about people outside of your living situation. Do you have a problem with,
Starting point is 00:36:16 you know, the man who runs the local shop, do you have a problem with, you know, one of your teachers, do you have a problem with someone you work with? Yeah. Oh yeah, or a company. I was gonna say a colleague. Yeah, do you have a thing? Do you have a thing with the work with?
Starting point is 00:36:35 Well, that's pretty much that's it. That's it, yeah, yeah, that's it. But yeah, if you, oh, do you have a problem with a big company? Do you have a problem with a big company? I'd love to hear about that. Yeah, we'd love to hear about it. So beefbrotherspodcastatgmail.com,
Starting point is 00:36:48 beefbrotherspodcastatgmail.com, or you can send us a tweet if it's a brief one, or of course the PappiesFlatShareatgmail.com also all gets to us. So it all leads our way. We'd love to hear from you. We'd love to hear your beefs Especially free range beefs, but of course we will accept the beefs of any and every kind We'll do our best to try and solve them because we've got a beef brother's episode coming out next week
Starting point is 00:37:13 So oh So have a wonderful week everybody God save the king and God save Clarkie and and God save Clarky and God save, let's not forget God save Parry wherever he may be. Wow, wherever he may be. Think of your pals. Think of your man. I mean, it's a pretty bleak sound again. Think of your man, wherever you are.
Starting point is 00:37:39 We're worried about you. With your increasingly successful career. We're worried about your man. This, hey, we know you and this ain't about you. With your increasingly successful career. We're worried about you, man. Hey, we know you, and they say it like you. They say it like you, bro. They say it like you, bro. We made a mess. They say it like you.
Starting point is 00:37:54 No real success, please. We love God. Well, everybody, this podcast was indeed produced by Emma Corsham. Corsham team! And there's little more to say other than, cheers everyone. Bye!

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