Pappy's Flatshare - House Meeting (Heroes in a half shell) S10E49

Episode Date: December 8, 2020

Matthew, Ben and Tom slide into your ear canal for a catch-up. TURTLE POWERTickets are available NOW for our Festive Flatshare Slamdown with special guests Jon Richardson and Josie Long! Tuesday December 15th, 8pm GMT on Youtube. Pour yourself an advocaat (or vegan alternative) and join us! https://eventbrite.co.uk/e/131788056625/Pappy’s - https://twitter.com/pappystweetSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareEdited by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Greetings, listener dear, I'm Tom. I'm Ben. And I'm Matthew and welcome to another Pappy's flat share house meeting. Yes, yes, yes, before we get into it we should say we are gliding towards the end of the year and what way to celebrate that fact than joining us for the Christmas flat slam. Oh, absolutely right. Glides, tidings we bring to you and your kid. Always a highlight for the seasons for me. Yes, it really is. So on the 15th of December, which is next Tuesday, we are going to be doing it again as we've been doing all of them over Zoom. So you can watch it on YouTube if you go to eventbrite.co.uk and search for a papi's flat share or go to our Twitter

or our Facebook. The ticket link is there. In fact, we'll put it in the show notes for the show, but we've got two amazing guests. Oh, yeah. We've got really, really good. Josie Long and John Richardson. Bam! So you don't wanna miss it. Richardson hasn't done it since I think series one.

Wow. We were talking about this the other day, yeah. It was a long time ago. It was one of our only ones at the Phoenix. Josie, obviously, has been on the show. Regulese, one of our dearest friends, and one of our favorite guests. So it's going to be a good one.

So go to eventbright.co.uk, e-v-e-n-t-b-r-i-t-e.co.uk, and get your tickets today. They're a five-hour or three if you work for the NHS. Absolutely, right, right. Well, before we get into this house meeting, you've got an email, we've got an email or two, from a list of deals. Got a couple of emails. And again, Tom, it's picking

up on a few things that you've said. We had a message from a Greg. Okay. A Greg from America. Okay, this is Greg from Greg via PapisFlatShare at gmail.com. Please get in touch. He says, hello Emma and guys. Yes, I am American from Kansas City. Yes, I am listening or was listening. And yes, my name is Greg with three Gs, not all in a row. I've been called Craig or Craig as he spells it. I've been called Craig so many times I usually just let it go.

In my opinion, Greg rhymes with leg and Craig rhymes with haig as in the haig. Oh, I think that's very good. Yes, very good. Yes. Love your show. Thanks for the shout out. I love it when super famous people mention me. Baaaay! Thank you, Craig! Greg from Kansas City. So there we go.

Craig, the leg. Thank you, Craig. We need to get the t-shirt that says Greg Rons' leg and Greg Rons with hate. And then a picture of, pictures I'm being tried at the hate. On the back. Tony Bloody Blair, hopefully. To you bloody right, try it at the William Hake. Is that satire? So this is another message from, again, a message from Samuel here by a beef brothers podcast

at gmail.com. He writes, hello Matthew, Emma, Ben and Tom in ascending order of height. Possibly. It's been so long since we've been in the same room. I've got no idea. Well, we all grown. Have you been putting on a growth spurt in like that? Yeah. That would be a waste of it. I spent two or three days on the rack, actually. Yeah, like a medieval torture improvement. But like Tony Bloody Blair, right? He three days on the rack actually yeah like a medieval medieval torture improvements. But like somebody Blair right? He spent time with the rack. Yeah absolutely.

Sat I am mate. So this is allow the desserts he says I agree whole heartedly with Tom's view on desserts. Now this was your controversial opinion in the last flat slam that we should just get rid of desserts completely if you would have missed it. If you personally agree with you, does it stop being controversial? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I think that's all it takes.

Two people, you've got a movement on your hands, really. This is the will of the people. I agree, Tom's view on... No, Samuel, it's the Samuel of the people, sorry. I agree, wholeheartedly, Tom Svion's desserts, I wouldn't miss him if they were gone, would not miss them. If we're going two courses, I'll always choose starter in a main,

or if there's a cheese board, I'll always have that instead of a sweet dessert. It's not that I hate desserts, I don't. I just rather have more savoury, yeah. And this is the bit that really, really struck me, because actually, I do relate to this. I'd like it to be socially acceptable to have a starter after the main,

as well as before, if we're talking a three-core situation. Samuel. Love that. I don't mind that. I don't like that. I love that. That's a really good... I wonder what you... I mean, presumably, most restaurants would be fine with that. Starter mates. If you're not in a finisher, they should start calling it

like finisher or something like that. A finisher, yeah. Yeah, I would love that, right? Because if you finish game, Cro for your finisher. Crockets! I've had a thought. I've got an issue. I've got a question I want to ask you. I want to talk. I want a chat. Okay let's sit down and chew the fat. House meeting. What temperature should we set the heat to? House meeting. Why on earth am I always weeping? House meeting. So, morning everybody. Great to see you guys. As always. So as you know, I've been trying

to get a lot of stuff for my new house, trying to get stuff in gear and I bought the, I bought a new washing machine the other day alone. Right? Always very exciting, quite a grown up thing. I don't, in fact, I think it might be the first washing machine I've ever bought. Very, very topical chat for me because I'm just a group of my parents that's going to be my 40th birthday present. Oh, this is, this is the reason I bring this up, Perry, because you know, you've got a big birthday

coming up, it's just around the corner, it's just a few days away. What do you get a 40 year old? It's a tricky thing, isn't it? Look, I, I, just, anyway, we've, we've, I bought two, I've got one. Yeah. Just early doors on the chat about my birthday coming up. I, I, what I always see my birthday as is the sixth month marker that it's soon going to be Clarkies birthday.

Let's not make this about, you know, let's keep on mind on what this is really about. Sixth of June. In many ways there is only one birthday really. I see the 16th of December as halfway up the back of the year That's the way I see it's right Yeah creeping ever closer to the shoulders of new year So um so anyway, I got uh we got the old one taken out we got a a new washing machine put in, and the blanks came out. Did you say goodbye to the old machine?

Well, did you give me a little tap and be like, old friend? No, because it's not an old friend. It was in the house when we arrived, and the people who we bought the house off charged us 100 quid for it, and it hasn't worked since we got it. Oh, so there's no old friend about it. So it's like this is going to be a fast and boot out the door.

It's like a squat. Yeah, exactly, exactly. It's like bloody swampy. I turfed it out. So I, but actually, just for anyone anyone worried about this, we renegotiated it and we got the 100 quid back. So, I've not been, I've not been fleeced.

But, there's a recurring theme in the builders coming around to do stuff on our house. The recurring theme is that they look at a thing that's in the house and they go, oh, why have they done that? Everyone who comes and looks at any bit of our house says that the previous people who've done work on it have done it all wrong. Oh, why'd they do that?

So this was no exception. The guy fitting it and taking the old one away goes, oh, it have done it all wrong. Oh, why'd they do that? So this was no exception, the guy fitting it and taking the old one away goes, oh, you know, it's fine. If it's- If it's- If it's the Fired Very In Experience Builders. So we go-

We're starting with the concept, you like go, why they do that? You go, well, it's a window. Oh, okay. What it does is it's quite clever. They're brewing that well. Yeah, I mean, they're brewing that well. But you understand, you see, the glass means

that the light can come in and that's why they've done that. Maybe they're just off the press. You can see right out to the street there. That's not good. Problem is, they can see the other way. Yeah, exactly, that's it. Why else they're doing that?

It's because it's a load bearing wall, so it needs that. That's why they've done that. Do you think, why do you need me to explain this to you? Well, these are the guys who came with the washing machine, basically. We bought the washing machine from John Lewis. These guys showed up. They were John Lewis's owns.

You'd think the John Lewis boys were know what they were doing. Anyway, he looks at the washing machine. He says, it'll fit. And I go, of course, it'll fit. I measure it up and everything. He says, it'll fit. But there's a real problem.

It's your waste. Well, I have to bite my tongue to not make a joke about where we've all put some weight on and locked down, haha, haha, haha. But I'm not that late, you should have. Don't bite your tongue for it. Don't bite your tongue that'll make their day. Do you think that would have made their day?

I know, I know, I know, I know, I know. They'll reuse that. Do you think so? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You, you took that their way, they'll be at their next job and they'll say, look, there's a problem with your waste, no, I haven't gone before you think it, we've all put,

I mean, I wouldn't bite my tongue saying that on this, a, I hesitate to use the words professional broadcast, but you know, and you're right to hesitate. You should have bitten your tongue before you use the phrase professional broadcast. If ever there's a moment to bite your tongue, it's just describing anything that we do as professional. I'm surprised you still got a tongue

after that. I know, straight through it. So he says yeah the thing is I can't I can't find the waist pipe. I think it's I think it's behind the fitted cupboards. I was like is it? And he's like yeah yeah there it is. He's behind the fitted cupboards. So I don't know what to do really. And I said, well, what are my options? He goes, well, I'll take it away. And I go, well, don't take it away. We want the washing machine.

This isn't a whimsical thing, we need it. And he goes, oh, I can just break the shelves. You'll break the back of the shelves. He'll show you your legs. What? What? I'll just take this washing machine and I'll just drop it on your ankles and you'll shut your mouth and that'll be it. Alright fair enough, fair enough big less.

What? Why bads? But yeah, so I go, alright, well you can break the back of the thing, because obviously we want this washing machine, it's kind of more important. It goes, are you sure you want me to do this? So he's basically putting it back on there. Are you sure you want me to do this? And I go, well, I mean, if there is no alternative, if we want this washing machine, then I guess you're going to have to break it. So he goes in there into the back of the, and there is no alternative, if we want this washing machine, then I guess you're gonna have to break it.

So he goes in there into the back of the, and there's like a little cut out where you can get to like the taps to turn off the water supply and stuff. So it's like a natural break in it, and he just grabs it and he like snaps the bit of MDF. He's just like, breaks it, just breaks it.

Yeah, and he goes, I'll try and make it as clean as possible as he's doing it. And it's obviously, it looks like fucking shit. It's not clean as possible. It's just a big, sort of jagged, jagged crack. And I go, all right, well anyway, you get on with it. I come back and he goes, yeah, yeah, it's all fitted. It's all fitted.

Just one thing, turns out, yeah, the waist pipe wasn't there. And I'm like, what? And he goes, yeah, yeah, yeah, it was actually, it was just a little bit further along. It's quite easy to access actually. But there's nothing I can do at this stage, is there? He's already torn apart, mate. So now I've got a cupboard that the back of the cupboard. He's just, some big bloke was coming in torn the cupboard. But because he said, are you sure you want me to do it? I've got no recourse.

Do you think he does that wherever he can get he can? Do you think that's his thing? I feel like he's like a black belt and he's just constantly trying to cry a chop wood in half. You know, that I would have loved Clarky. That wasn't the dream, wasn't it, as a kid? Oh, yeah. To be able to break stuff with your hands. All you wanted to do as a kid was get to the level

where you could break wood with your bare hands. Yeah, that felt like that felt like the pinnacle Yeah, and then I think I've got a feeling the correct it moved on to big blocks of ice and That was seen as some kind of Step up. Oh, right. I thought you've seen us selling out. Yeah, that's where you jump the shark. Yeah Right you dropped the shark. Yeah. It's a little bit. Right, you chopped her shark and two. LAUGHTER Um, yeah, the chop, chop in the bits of word or, um, alternatively, headbutting a brick.

That was, that was really seen as though, you know. I can't do that. It... Yeah, I mean, yeah. Headbutting a brick and it breaking in half being a crucial next to the next. Well, something breaks it off. Have you ever done anything like that? Have you ever done anything you considered to be like

cool and amazing feet of string? Or could you have ever done anything cool? Oh, I'm the question, sure. In fact, I'll wind it even further. Have you ever done anything? Oh, do you? Anyone ever done anything? Ever? It's rubbish, isn't it?

We're all absolute waste pipes. Being able to pull a lorry... Er... Wait, these things you've done? These are all things that I thought I was going to be able to do once I got really strong. Is this purely from watching like... The world's strongest man. I guess it was going to be able to do what's got really strong. Is this purely from watching like the world strongest man? I guess it was, but I know I'm flipping a tyre. No, the flipping tyre always seemed like a silly one, didn't it?

We could all flip a tyre. I tracked a tyre. You kind of go, I'll just come across a track the tyre, so I'll watch someone flip it. It's like the Kaiba Toss, you watch someone toss a Kaiba and you kind of go, I've never come across a tractor tire, so I'll watch someone flip it. It's like the Kaiba toss, you watch someone toss a Kaiba and you kind of think, yeah, I could do that. Because... Are you thinking of a Kaiba? I didn't want to say. Kaiba's...

Yeah, toss the carry on up the Kaiba. I've always called it a Kaiba. He's not setting Scotland. No, I thought it might have been you know, there you go. Carry on toss carry on toaster cable. When they bring back the carry on movies, which is only a matter of time, they should definitely do one in Scotland. Oh, cool, carry on toaster cable.

Okay, baby, yeah, that's great. So sorry, what are you saying about, why does that seem silly? They chuckin' a long pole. Well, I mean, are you answered your own question? I wasn't saying it was silly. I was saying it's silly, I was saying it just seems like one of those things that you think you can do. Yeah, you've never had any experience with a cable. Yeah, that's true.

So like you can't your brain can't qualify that what they're doing there is mad tough. You think it's a light cable? All right. Is it balsa wood? Is that what you're imagining? A balsa wood cable? I mean, I literally have like, if you said I'll give you,

you know, let's have a bet about this cable, you've been able to get that cable up there and overall, or whatever, I'd be like, I have no reference to go on here. Yeah, I'm not having a cable with me. I've got a feeling I can do it because I've never, I've rarely, I mean like, it's a bit, it's a bit like pole vaulting, you kind of go, I get it.

Oh, I get it. You know what, absolutely. That's one of those things, I've never done it, but you assume anyone can do it and the elites can do it really well. That's kind of what you see. One of those events, I think what we're getting at is the K by the pole vault. I never thought that was going to happen.

Absolutely true. What you need is someone who's never done it before or someone normal to be in there just to show you as a benchmark. By the way, like America football, you watch these people throw these footballs and what you really need is someone to go, by the way, this is what you'd look like if you threw that, okay, now appreciate that a bit more. Yeah, yeah.

In fact, like even like going into an art gallery, they should like, they should remind you of what something that you've painted looks like. This is your step, because that's the reason people go to an art gallery is to feel shit about themselves, isn't it? It's not to see beauty, but it's to go, oh, I can never do that. Well, we made a people who come out of an art gallery

and go, eh, he's doing it like this. It's just blue and red, didn't it? You kind of go, yeah, but it's done very well. The lily. I still look really nice. You've got to look a bit. Also, blue and red, those are the taps, mate. You were just looking at it.

This modern bloody art. But yeah, it feels like, it feels like what you need is a gentle reminder. This is how it looks like if you do it. No, no, no. So you appreciate that guy with the cable. In the same way that, in a movie, there would be like, you know, like, they used to be the sort of short cartoon before you'd watch the main film. What you need is a five-assied match before a V-football match.

Is that what you're saying? So people can go, these guys really can't play. Also, I think, yeah. Even when they're not playing that well, they're still playing better than a bunch of guys you meet up after work. But also, I think like being able to see the actual result of you, because I think even if you, I think probably most people think oh yeah I'm pretty pretty good when I'm playing you need to see you're playing you need to actually if you go oh yeah doesn't doesn't look good actually I feel that when I'm I feel that when I'm running

around the park everybody looks awful running around the park occasionally you'll see something looks amazing and you'll be like, oh right, that means that I'm a local person. Oh no, sorry, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I'll follow that person. I'll try and overtake them, I have an aspirin attack. I'll fall into a bush. But in your mind, you're not thinking I'm probably,

I've probably got exactly as bad technique as everybody else, my feet are sticking out in two different directions and I'm hunched over and all the kind of stuff. I'm tense. I was jogging the other day, and I heard someone running up behind me, so I moved over for them to overtake me. And it was a guy that looked like he was mid-70s,

at least, looked older than my dad. But also, he didn't look like he was that age But like had been like a really good runner and was running all his life He looked like so he was on doctor's orders like really He looked like he was going really slowly Yeah, there's in my frame didn't he pretty much? I was like oh god how slow am I going? I thought I was running at a fine speed. Yeah, that used to be the thing at Park Run.

I used to do Park Run and little kids would overtake you. And you go, you should be faster than an 11-year-old. Yeah. But then they're running all the time. Yeah. And there is definitely something to be said about the age of, like, the age of runner that they just they don't stop is the key and they just they're like what you think this guy's been running all his life. They're like you come across it a lot in the marathon where you get like you

get this kind of, you know, it's not quite hair and tortoise, but there's something like relentless about those old runners. It's like it follows or something, it's like there, go on, they're on A. They're naked, they're still on the roof. They're on A speed that doesn't stop.

You know, like, I'll tell you what it's like. It's like when you're driving in a traffic in traffic and you see like a flash gith in a BMW, you're like, changing lanes and trying to, you know, go, go and accelerate. And then you keep on getting up to the traffic lights at the same time as the movie. Yes.

And when you look at them and you're like, don't worry, guy, we all get there. You feel like you this kind of worldy-wise person who's like, we're all get there in the end. Exactly. If anything, you're used, I'm getting there on less petrol because you're also going sideways. Exactly, and that's what an old runner is like.

Same in the suit, I mean, I think we've talked about it in the swimming pool. Same in the swimming pool, same in the park. It's like these old cunts, they know what to do. They're just... Well, it's like these old cunts they know what to do. They're just... Well, it's your 40th birthday soon, so you'll be able to... You wouldn't have to say these old cunts, you'll be able to say us old cunts. Yeah, exactly.

We know. You're lying in the lung, baby, with all the secrets to life. Yeah. Can't wait. Did you whisper any secrets to you as you went past? He just went... Speed up. Fuck it out.

Get out my way. You're going backwards. What are you doing? The waste pipe is by the taps. That's easy. I've said it once before, but it bears a repeat. That's easy. It is like a problem with this day and age.

Is like... Oh, here we go. Here we go. Old man, Pary. It is like a problem with this day and age is like oh Here we go. Here we go old man. Powery. No, you just think like What's the problem with kids today? Hey people need to is it the sick talks? It's not even the kids there like If people need to appreciate people doing stuff is actually quite impressive People doing anything's quite impressive. This is also what you put outside the art gallery isn't it? People doing anything's quite impressive. This is also what you put outside the art gallery, isn't it? Yeah. It's like, people doing anything is quite impressive actually.

That should be like the kind of main motto. I like that. It's like, it's a sub-IT ship without. Yeah, it's a message to our listeners. You know what I mean, yeah. People you get to think it's quite impressive, just. Yeah, chill out, stop giving them such a hard time. Yeah, exactly. That's what I mean? You get a thing that's quite impressive. Just fucking chill out. Stop giving everyone such hard time. Yeah, exactly.

If it's not fucking mad. Well, I wonder why that is. I think justifiably if it's not fucking mess. I know we're not a topical podcast, but this has been recorded in December of 2020. And you know, if you're listening back, I mean, which you would you will be. You can't be listening now we're recording it but if you're listening back it's um there's a global pandemic coming. Yeah but I don't think that's why people have got more judgmental I think it's more to do with the's like, I think it's like,

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It's impossible to communicate anything with the eyes I find. I've got, I've, what I've realized, the thing I've realized these last sort of 10 months or so, I've pretty, I've got pretty dead eyes. I think, but they say nothing. It's surprised, it's about the only thing, doesn't it, for eyes. And that eyebrows.

It's not even eyes. It helps when you get to the supermarket. Imagine yourself as Grommit. That's what I think I do in my head. That's a good, what yeah. Just picture yourself as Grommit, and then it helps. Because he's, he's, is there any situation where it doesn't help, I'd say?

He's the greatest physical communicator of our time. Absolutely. There's not a lot that Grommit can't communicate. Situation where it doesn't help I see is the greatest physical communicator of our time Absolutely There's there and there's not a lot that Grommit can't communicate so so like in a supermarket incident Just if you could visualize Grommit in that situation You'll probably be doing what Grommit would do and then you'll be okay So you also go to the supermarket wearing nothing but a collar around your neck Clutching a spanner and carrying an old man with me. Well, he's running past you.

Shout in there. Just doing other things impressive, all right? Yeah. Chromic knows. Chromic, Chromic, Chromic can get you could you could just put drop Chromic into any situation across the world. And he's's gonna let people know what's going on just with his eyes. He should be a diplomats for the UK. Sticking in the Brexit talks, peace of cake, everyone's coming out of the deal.

If grommets, yeah, absolutely. There's no way you would, also as well, basically whatever we'd like out of Brexit, he'd be getting it, right? Because it's grommet. If grommet was your spirit, if grommet was your spirit animal, you'd be perfect. I really believe that. I think like, if grommet was your spirit animal,

all would be well with the world. I don't have you ever have you ever have you ever seen Grommit make a bad judgment. Have you ever seen him do anything where you kind of go steady on Grommit? I know that's what something Wallace and But like it's always Wallace's net Wallace is always but Grommit knows man If you have Gromit make make Gromit your spirit guide you can have a good week Give it a try. What would Gromit do? So like like the Native American guy in the movie The Doors You you would want sort of Gromit to be following you around Kind of what no one else can see guiding you. It's a's a good question. I mean, what do spirit animals do? Yeah, I was gonna ask this.

Because it's definitely a thing, isn't it? But what, what, they don't fully are running, it's not like, it's not Philip Paulmann, is it? But it's like, do you imagine your essence? There's like, I think, I'm trying to think of the one that might experience spirit animals. His dark materials, where they're literal and they're there and they're

fully around as demons. Um, uh, Harry Potter, whether you're patrowness or something, uh, is that right? Is it patrowness? Where like, when you, when you need help, you envisage an animal and it leaps out and helps you. Oh, so that's right. That's what you have in Harry Potter. That would be great. What we have is payin' trisage, where you imagine them that's what you have in Harry Potter. That would be great. He's paying for your arms where you imagine them and they send you money once a month to keep you from counting.

Yes. They're asperin animals. I like it. Well yeah, I don't know what a spirit animal does. B, I'm not entirely sure what my spirit animal is. Have you got a clear view of what your spirit animal is? No, I don't. I don't. I thought it was the animal that, you know, that kind of embodies your personality, or that your personality most closely resembles. Does that make sense? Yes.

Or on a superficial level, one that you look a bit like. That's what you all really think. When you think, well I think you're spirit animal, it's a giraffe. What that means is you're talking someone with long legs and a neck mate. You haven't looked into this. Well, not just a long neck, but.

Any neck. Well, anyone else who's got a shoulders up by the rear, up by the rear is. Or an ass. Well, you would presume going to show this up by the idea that there is or an ass But you would presumably be some sort of What what I mean, I was thinking maybe like a turtle or something. It's got a hump on his back you a turtle actually Do you think I'm turtle? We could we just think about the teenage beauty ninja turtles. Yeah, okay, we're just a gang of turtles

There's four of us all I I wanna do, as previously stated, is be able to karate chop a board in half. And if I was at the intersection, I could do it. All you wanna do is eat a pizza in the sewer. So what's been your dream? What we've gone from now is, we've gone from, who is your spirit animal to? What do you think you need to totally use?

Okay, I thought I'd probably more comfortable with this. He's a Buzzfeed quiz, is that it? I'm more comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation.

Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation.

Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this conversation. Okay, well, I'm not comfortable with this leader. Yeah, Leonardo. Not according to partners in crime. Really? In Tio R T L E power. I got the lead. I got the lead. Definitely Leonardo.

In total power, Raphael's described as the leader. Yeah, Raphael. He's the leader of the group, transformed from the norm by the nuclear goop. Pizza is the food that's sure to please. These ninjas are interpepperonian cheese. Can't argue with that. That's, that's, all of those, all of those facts, that's right. Yeah, that's bigger to please these ninjas are into pepperoni and cheese. Can't argue with that. That's all of those facts.

Yeah, that's right. The Wikipedia. Lyrics. Lyrics learned as a rope from a new kid. That's better than any encyclopedia. I'm having that too. Absolutely. Leonardo is always the leader.

Rafael's the one who has problems. He's like the edge of one He's got a science and Michelangelo's the laid-back party, dude Right That's so what that's the so Leonardo's got the sort of like organizational skills and and He can inspire I see I see what you're angling for here crossbeating with organizational skills and and he can inspire. I see I see what you're angling for here, Crosby, leading with organizational skills on Leonardo and then and then tricking it in the back. I see what you're trying to I see what you're trying to back here. All I'm saying is he swords on your back. He'd be the one who reads the emails.

Donatello. I'm I he'd be the one who does the lion share the tweets. I think Donatello, I think that's Donatello. He sets up the event bright page. He's like, that's his style, right? I mean, I'm concerned now, because I felt myself wasn't made to ask, has Ray Fael got even deemed he's a vicious guy? He's not just an asshole, is he? No, he's cool. Has Ralph Algonne even deemed his features?

He's cool. He's not just an asshole, is he? No, he's cool, but he's rude. Yeah, give me a break. Which, as we all know, the rudest thing anyone could say. Yeah, I guess that's the breaks, isn't it? Because Corsham's done a tell-o because she's pulling the street She's she's working the dials and working with machines Taking these words and putting them on the thing. I mean, it's a straight. I'm not I'm not gonna be able to tell you for a

And they do and he have two toes Go toe-to-to with you for Leonardo. Oh man. well that is, is that ruined your day? No, no, I thought you got to embrace, you got to embrace the reality of a situation, I don't know, you've got to just learn that that's self awareness is a tremendous thing. Is it? I never really thought about it.

But that does break down, doesn't it? So we're saying I'm a Michelangelo, right? Is that, that was never in doubt.'re saying I'm a Michelangelo, right? Is that? That was never in doubt. Love it. Yeah. You're definitely Michelangelo. It's who I was, a little kid. A man, a man child.

Hey, hey, I'm just a party dude, all right? He's a party dude. He's a party dude. He loves to really interpret her. And I have the worst weapon. It just happens that all the people that Clarky parties with have sort of slowly stopped passing and now Clarky party is a party dude on his own. It is flat. That is the tragedy of Michelangelo really, isn't it? We think you're quite getto.

You just never stop at him. Well they're always teenagers, aren't they? Absolutely. Absolutely. Men told that that is how Michelangelo Leonardo Rafael and Donatello are better. No, no. That's another thing you're going to put outside the art gallery. Absolutely. This is actually what you've got. It lacks focus, but it's making a lot of salient points. It's yet another thing that is wrong with the modern world, I will say, on my part bench, to an old man running by, he's also my friend and peer. You've got to go like, if you said, if you said right, we're doing a teenage beauty digital art tool, where there's a little bit of Leonardo,

a little bit of Donatello, and you're actually displaying the Grandmasters work. That might actually get more people along than not. Yeah, I think if you had, it's not a bad idea, is it? You've got the tour guides are dressed as the turtles and they can talk about it, but in a kind of fun way that the kids can relate to, they throw in a cow a bunga.

And we say radical ones. Yeah, and this is our job. This is where we go in and we advise the tour guides in the art gallery of how to act like a certain turtle. So I'll be like, look, every now and again, just flip out, man, chuck a mood, walk off, because that's what I think apparently we're art holes. Yeah, man, cheer with me and smoke a dew. And you'll be like, I've put the newsletter on the website about what time the art gallery opens. And of course, we'll be like, I'll be like, fuck sake. And of course,

we'll be like, if the temperatures not this in the art gallery, then all the paintings will melt. I'm like, I could just fucking told you that. It's not fucking outside, if it may. And then people will be like, oh, luckily an Ardo could actually paint. And everyone will have had a nice day. And then, because it's this day and age, someone will go home and go, bruh, this was the worst art

calorie I've ever been to. No stars. Go. A little bit like, see, that's the problem with the world mate. What did you do when you do Lustrawer, a fucking man in a star or whatever, Leonardo da Vinci did? Oh man, in a circle. Yeah, that's the right, what's that guy called? The Vitruvian man.

AKA, man in a Stirl. A.K.A. Man with four legs. One, A.K.A. I'm one Willy. Carry on up the collar. LAUGHTER But yeah, spirit, like, I guess your spirit animal is what you picture inside of you, right?

I mean, it would be... Yeah. It would be neglectful of us to get out of this chat without us trying to zone in on a spirit animal. Yeah, absolutely. But obviously mine's gonna be fucking some kind of viper or some shit the way this is gone. Oh, this is old fucking Raphael over there. It's gonna have some kind of fucking crab at his soul. Listen man, at least people aren't like...

A soul crab? Your shredder or... Crab, is it crab? Fucking, yeah, that's some two steps away from you. Your big boy, this conversation's going. Yeah, hey, bebop and rock steady, I think we'd take that climb. Yeah. Crossbeast, maybe that's the closest we're gonna get to it. Crossbeast, crab, and then your bebop and rock steady. I think we'd take that client. Yeah. Crossbeast, maybe that's the closest we're going to get to it.

Crossbeast crying. And then you're bebop and rock steady. Actually, that does fit a better caution. Of course, I'm sure that feels more like a kind of comfortable glove. Yeah. So, so I'm just unlike this little sort of blobby thing. This little cinder that... Yeah.

Sort of moving a big giant robot man. You're a brain, I think I've got to feel like crankwork levers with a bit of this brain. With these little sort of, yeah, these little sort of tentacles. Yeah. Yeah, little brain cords would move levers around. Which would suggest that isn't a brain,

isn't the job of the brain is just to move stuff around without... The brain doesn't go down to your hands and wiggle around to it. He's basically a stomach brain. A lot of gut experts will tell you, the second brain of the body, so maybe they were on to something. Yeah, head of the time. Whereas me and Clarky, we're a rhinoceros and a war tag that have gone through. And they just kind of perpetually, perpetually just lose. Yes. And the very way that person is like, oh, we lost again. There's a spin off series in bebop and rock steady where you actually get to the true. You're going to do a rosin cranson gillinston aded for bebop and rock steady. Oh my god, parry, that is a phenomenal idea.

For people from Rocksteady are dead. I would, God, that's a really funny idea. Such a good idea. That's it. And it's like, you're really getting to their kind of existence. And it's tough. It's tough being people from Rocksteady. And it's all, you know,

like it'll start with then they've just been in a fight with the turtle, they've been beaten up quite badly, but it'll be like a long conversation about what they could've done differently and whether or not they still want to do this job and the nature of existence. They're smart, mate, are said to them. Guys, look, I can earn you a quick bit of money here.

If you go to that fucking, you have to go to this way, I'll pick up a few boxes for me and we're all going to make a bit of cash, okay? Yeah. You know, cash in and that's no question. The taxmer's not going to know and they go, well, crayons are smart. He's a smart guy. We remember him. He's smart. We're not smart. He's literally a brain. We're going to pick up these boxes and they're going to go to the way I picked up these boxes and suddenly these fucking green cunts pop out you know one of them's sending an email and Soared to them or some shit and the other ones angry

And then they get their ass kicked and then they they're kind of like oh man God that wasn't as easy as we were told It's not their fault, you know, and then they're like that's actually like well just repeat ad nauseam Just keep doing it every week. Oh I mean, like, we'll just repeat ad nauseam. Just keep doing it every week. Oh, cranks business. Yeah, he's always doing it. And it's like, now at this time maybe we'll,

because then we'll have that money, and then you know, you can pay rent, and we'll finally get to go on holiday as we've always planned. Yeah, that's it. It's like, you know, that's a really, really good kind of analogy. Everyone can see themselves in people from Rocksteady, because we're all kind of trying to save up for that thing

that we're kind of in the back of our minds now is never gonna happen, because either the work isn't there. Top of the dry air. It's all dry air. From that thing, yeah, exactly, exactly. Got a bison, you fit the cupboards. The Kombi Washer dryer, a little bit of press board

to stick at the back of the cupboard. It's never gonna happen, is it? So I aspire out of the malls to a war tiger rhinoceros and a brain. I'm not sure. I think you've got a bit of a... I think I've done it. Think I've done it, okay?

I'm not... When it was your suggestion, if anything, maybe... Maybe all the ideas, man, maybe your crang. Maybe I'm B-bop and Clark is rock steady. I'm not happy with this. I think we should, I think we should go back to the drawing. Listen, you weren't happy with Raphael.

You weren't happy with B-bop. You're reacting very much like a Raphael to all of this. No one, no one's happy with Raphael. No one needs to be Raphael. There's a darkness to be. Harry, you just find out your Raphael. You know. You're not. We're going to give you a break. What's... I know you've wanted it. All your life. You're finally going to get it. You can have a break.

What, I've gone, are you, are you sacking Raphael? You're out. Fuck it out. I mean, like, that's, this is how you tell me, live in a professional broadcast. Okay, well, before we go, let's have a quick spin at our spirit animals then. Okay. I was thinking something along the lot. I was thinking small bits of, I was thinking something along the line, I was thinking small bits of, I was thinking I mean like a terrier. Yeah, I think little terrier, you know, small can be quite enthusiastic prone to mood swings. Also they kind of look, they're the kind of dog that always looks like it's old, even when it's your own.

Yeah, looks like it looks like an old guy with a beard. It's very difficult to get away from dogs when you're looking at spirit animals because it's true. We spend a lot of time with dogs and you go, I think types of dogs can go. Should we tell people that this is recorded live at Battersea Dogs home? We should have mentioned that really. And have we ever told anyone that we're dogs. We should have made more about the fact that we're talking dog podcast.

We should wrap up this podcast because we've got to play Billiards. Yeah, absolutely. But we've got that barbilliards game. We've got to play a lot of fantastic hand of cards. And this cigar isn't going to smoke itself. Yeah, okay, let's not get this up, dog. Those paintings are actually done by Raphael. You know the name of it. Yeah.

Hahaha. Some, I mean, yeah, who, who originally painted the dog, the dog's playing cards podcast? It wouldn't be like fun to like find out that that is like the richest painter playing cards podcast. It wouldn't be fun to find out that that is the richest painter that ever lived. The first painting of the dog's playing cards, or is there only one and it gets reprinted all the time?

Or was there a trend of let's paint dogs playing cards? Or is it only one person? What was there a trend of dogs doing things in like you know like dogs doing human things normally like sat around a bar or Like the like the Edward Hopper picture or I feel like I've seen a few different different pictures of dogs You know like chomp on cigars with beer Alone in a cafe at night. Yeah exactly Night dogs night dogs at the at night. Yeah exactly. Night dogs. Night dogs at the diner yeah. Absolutely dogs diner of that. All I'm saying is that there must have been a guy who first painted

that picture and thought this is great. It's dogs but they're playing cards. Yeah and people said it's not great you went what the bloody guy have you done? Can you paint? Can you paint? No you can't. Come to the art gallery anyway. Come on in. Oh by the way Cowabunga dude. So folks there it was. Yeah indeed. There it was indeed. Can you touch up to your spirit animal? What, uh, what turf will you? What's in the way?

Getting touch. Yeah, we get into the cast, but I have to be straight on Twitter. Do you want to fund Bebop and RocksteadyR Dead? It's a musical. I really like that. Yeah, so papysflatshareitgmail.com or beefbrotherspodcasts. Oh, the other thing I wanted to ask for people, if you are, if you have a festive beef,

we're gonna do beefbrothers cold turkey as our next episode. So if you're listening to this on the day it comes out, then the chances are there's still time to send beefbrotherspodcast at gmail.com. Send us any of your festive beefs, any of your things that sort of crop up when you're at home at Christmas time, whether it's about the way people wrap presents or it's about the food people prepare or whether it's about literally anything at all to do with Christmas and we will solve your festive, flat share beef.

Hop along to the Patreon, during the Patreon community, show your support, there's loads of bonus content there, there's lovely ways to get in touch. Lovely ways to get in touch. That's one of the main things about the Patreon guys. There's a message function which I think gets used maybe three times a year and it is a lovely way to get in touch and people don't use it enough. Patreon.com, forward slash Pappy's flat share and get in touch, guys. Yeah, and please buy tickets for the 15th. It's always a pleasure to do the Christmas Flatslam.

Yeah, baby. All right. Happy New Year's meeting, everyone. Happy House Meeting. This episode was produced by Emma Corsham. Corsham Crackers. Corsham Team. Cheers, everyone.

Coward by rocket. Corsham Crackers. Cowabuckets!