Pappy's Flatshare - House Meeting (Throwing Tat at the Wall) S12E35

Episode Date: September 26, 2022

Matthew, Ben and Tom slide into your ear canal for another house meeting. The post-party gift bag contains so many different pieces of tat - but will it stick to the wall or will it turn out not to be in any way magnetic?If you’d like to donate to the Children’s Hospital Pyjamas appeal, the easiest way is to visit their Amazon wishlist page:https://tinyurl.com/kmh2dpsfMore details are available on their website and social mediawww.childrenshospitalpyjamas.co.ukhttps://www.facebook.com/Childrenshospitalpyjamas/https://www.instagram.com/childrenshospitalpyjamas/https://twitter.com/pyjamasmiles19#SpreadingLoveThroughComfort  Registered Charity No: 1185739NEXT LIVE SHOW9th October at The Cheerful Earful festival in Balham - https://www.designmynight.com/london/pubs/balham/the-bedford/cheerful-earful-podcast-festival-day-4Support us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareProduced by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman planting her course to free to pat in love for. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things. It's like theaters for December 15th.

Greetings, listener dear, I'm Tom. I'm Ben. I'm Matthew and welcome to another exciting episode of Pappy's Flat Share House Meeting. House Meeting. Where we get together, it's three housemates and two the shit, two cheesies. Tom, you tell me. I'm not sure you should. You shoot the shit and two the cut.

And the cut. And shoot the, we do. So we'll get onto that in just a second. But before of that, well, a couple of things before of that. Tom, we got a message in from Jego about the very topic. We asked for this. How baggy you're in areas. Oh, I don't think there are many podcasts out there that are taking on these kind of issues. We had a few messages from people who

do have Baggy inner ears, etc. But this is one that is especially chimed from J-Go. Have you got it there Tom? I have indeed, Matthew Tom, Emma and Ben in order of least to absolutely ginger, the results are in. Oh, after an 11 year residency in my ear canals, it's only right that I should describe the location of your tenancy, I love it. My left ear canal is spacious and welcoming, but my right ear canal is very narrow, as when I was eight, a bee crawled inside

my ear and stung me. Other than childhood ear infections and a very small amount of hearing loss, my ear recovered well, but developed a quirk for rejecting in ear earphones as evidence that the pub last year when a friend lent me an earbud to listen to something on her phone but within 20 seconds it was expelled from my ear with such force it nearly landed in her pint. the ear headphones only camp. Is everyone be? Yeah. Wow, it's incredible. Yeah, so almost the opposite of what I've got, which is the one ear is a bit too baggy

for the ear pod. This is one, it's so tight that it can be taken a B in the year to even out crossbow. The problem is you'd have to be really sure that the B was going to 11 out just the right amount. You'd have to get the exact right size of B. I don't want to risk it on, you know, I've got these airports now. It would be really churlish. And I've got the new case it arrived from eBay So I've got the full set now. I'm back to square one. It would be it would be terrible if I then It's did it onto myself as well stuck a B in my ear got it to sting me And then meant they were no longer useful to me because I you know child-sized inner ears

So in answer your question, no, I don't want to do that. Thank you. Thank you for the offer. You're welcome. Right, you'd be saying bebe. Do you say bebe? Yeah, bebe. You'd be saying just in bebe. I've heard it now. Oh, Tommy made yourselfhmatic with humour.

Right. So we should also promo because it's just a fortnight away now folks and there are still a handful of tickets left for the exciting Ballum double bill of the Cheerful Eerful Festival. It's on the 9th of October at the Bedford in Ballum, tickets from the link in the show notes or cheerful, earful festival, you just Google it, cheer for the earful festival, or look at our Twitter, the ticket links are all there.

But it's gonna be us at 5pm, doing a flat shift slam down with the birthday girls as our guests, and then it's gonna be us as the guests of the birthday girls in their brilliant house, I was gonna say house meeting. Birthday girls house party is the name of their podcast, that's at 7pm. So it's a wonderful double bill, come along and join us.

I cannot stress enough, I'm so excited about this, I've been googling the pub, but it's one of your classic pubs, it's like the pub in Sean of the Dead, it's like Get To The Bed, but it's one of those iconic London pubs, they've had great comedy there for years and years and years. It's kind of like one of the kind of cornerstones of the South London

comedy scene, but it's just a classic South London boozer with two great groups of pounds in a kind of autumn Sunday boozy goodness, you know what I mean. It's gonna be a lot of fun. It's gonna be a lot of fun. You really sold me on it, to be honest. Yeah, honestly, I keep looking at pictures of the bed for being like, I love that bloody place. So yeah, so come along and join us for that and have a drink and you know, we'll be, I mean, the thing is,

we'll be done by half eight nine o'clock, why, why? Have a lovely little session after, it'll be great fun. Come and join us anyway. Cheer for Liverpool Festival for the details. We'll put somebody behind the bar for us. Sure, why not? If you're not willing to at least fork out

for the tickets, the ticket grand behind the bar, guys. Come on, treat it like it's a wedding. You're the father of the bride, stick a grand bar in the bar. Anyway, all the details for that in the show notes. Also the pajama appeal to get some pajamas for kids in hospital. So that every kid in hospital gets a clean, fresh,

new pair of pajamas on Christmas day. All the details are also in the show notes for that as well. So do hop on board about thanks to everyone who's donated so far. It really is an absolutely wonderful cause Right, let's get on with the episode. Yeah, have a good one team I've had a thought I've got an issue. I've got a question. I want to ask you. I want to talk. I want a chat Okay, let's sit down and chew the fat What temperature should we set the heat? Has meeting. Why on earth am I always waiting? Has meeting.

Who went my bed while I was sleeping? This has a has meeting. What's the point? Does life have a meeting? Has meeting. How are you with... Good, good to know. Yeah, I'll ask that first of all? How are you with? Good to know you. I'll ask that first of all, how are you? Thank you. Yes, I'm good, thank you. Tom, how are you? I'm a... I think I'm...

Okay. Oh, okay. All right, this is interesting. Let's drill down into this, because... Oh, I've got something I want to... Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I've got something I want to talk about, but that can always wait when a friend's in trouble. You think you're okay.

Where are the little cracks appearing? Where are the niggles? Where's the shadows of doubts? Well, the life that we've chosen for ourselves. Oh dear. Do you ask the last. What were you all expecting? No, no, because what I didn't want from it was,

he had to tell me that I'm not okay. If I asked, are you okay? Well, I think I'm okay. And then he starts to rip my life choices. Our life choices. And then that's the only way that. We have to give him. Our lifestyle we've chosen is a hike through the valley of the shadow of daught,

isn't it? Yes. Which is covered in cracks and then a little cracks. He can't be able to keep it over. So you can't be going any further. More right, but I'm also plinging on. It's a constant tightrope walk. So you learn to answer that question by going, yeah, I'm more right.

I don't know Tom, I don't think you've learned to answer that question. I'm going to break it to you. I feel like you haven't learned to answer that question because the answer to that question is, yeah, fine, good, good, take it along. I suppose to, yeah, I think I'm alright, which is how you did it, which I don't think, I think that will be the next step in this in this in this shadowy life that we're both, we're all three of us leading, we're going to learn to answer that question in a way that doesn't make people call the Samaritans. What are you saying, crossbow?

Give it to us. I was going to ask, how are you with throwing away? Am I sleeping? Terrible. I'm sorry. All four of those. I'm not at all. It'd be mad if I could.

Madden. You never think I've got going on. Imagine if I could just go, oh, no, no, it's asleep. It's not the stuff you've got going on. It's the stuff you haven't got going on. That's the thing, that's where that's the doubt, isn't it? Oh, I'm not having the thought of not having stuff. I mean, you know, it's got something now,

but then what next, what after that? Ha, ha, ha, ha. All right, steady the bus boys. Let's just... This is what happens when we record late evening on a bank holiday. We can't, you know, we can't handle that. Right, so I was going to ask, I mean, and again, maybe I'm taking us down another slightly sort of two-self reflective avenue, but that's what we do here at House Meeting. How are you at throwing away tats? Because I'll tell you the

situation I found myself in, Cleo unfortunately has been unwell and wasn't able to go to a birthday party this weekend. Oh, right. Real bummer. She's much better now, but the parent and the kid came over this morning to drop off the party bag. And he's got the constraints gone straight in the bin. Well, basically, yeah.

LAUGHTER What, what I need to know this, because I've got a party bag scenario coming up soon. Of course, yeah, yeah, yeah. You've got Glow's Birthday just around the corner. What's in the bag? What's in the bag? What's in the bag?

What's in the bag, right? I'll tell you what's in the bag. Now, first of all, you can't go wrong with stickers. Everybody loves stickers, right? We covered this. You're not just an absolute winner. You're not just talking about a packet of peninis, although I'm sure that would work,

but we're talking about the slightly squidgy stickers on a clear background that are of like... Lovely. you could decorate your ex-size book. Maybe there of little owls, maybe there of dinosaurs, maybe there are princesses and unicorns, that kind of thing, you can't go wrong with that. Even, you know what, even if they're just a bits of fruit, kids love it. I know. As in like stickers that you get on pieces of fruit. If you want to say a bit of cash, you have a card on your stickers. If you can get yourself some of those, a tape banana stickers, then yeah, you're absolutely

laughing. And then you also get your sweets that are not acceptable for the age group, which seems to be totally, even though like, we did this as well, you stick a bag of haribo in, we never have haribo in the house. So it wasn't quite haribo, it was a bit of knock off haribo in there. Is that one for the parents? It could be, yeah, it absolutely is actually.

Is it a little nod? I thought that's the lemon chello. Yeah, little bells, little miniature bells So this this that would you know that's what should happen really two party bags, right? Just for his yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah one one one clear one one kind of decorated plastic the other just a paper bag Yeah, the other is the bag you have to take through duty free. That's the other bag. That's gonna be, you've got to peel off the foil thing and seal it up.

It's one of those bags. So then you've got some of those, and then we get to the tat. And basically, so Charlie gave a Cleo the stickers. She'd look at the rest of the tat that was in the bag and went, we're getting rid of this, we don't need any of this, we're chucking this away. And these are the three items that I've not yet thrown.

I've told Charlie I've thrown them. Yeah, I'm gonna have to. And I've hung, I don't know why. So we've got a little small bouncing ball. You know, one of those very, very small balls that I imagine will bounce quite high. It might be one of the ones that's a bit crap that you think is going to bounce really high doesn't. It's one of those ones. It's got a sort of marble effect

and it's made a rubber. Yeah, still got that. Great at school. I mean, I don't think a ball can ever be tacked. Even if it's a ship ball, you always need a ball. Balls are balls. Balls are balls. And that's, you can't have too many balls. You have a variety of balls in your eyes. You have a ball, but I was right, I was, you have a ball bag, but I'll say you have a ball box. Or a ball ball.

And that's where all your balls go. Ball balls. Because a variety of balls. You're a good kid. You're a good kid. You're a good kid, you got a lot of balls. But like, if you've got a healthy variety of balls, we'll always stand you in good stead. Different friendship groups. I agree with that. And I think we've got a draw that's basic

full of those kind of things. I think that's going to slip into that draw. You've got a ball draw. We've got a ball draw, yeah. That's like the one item, isn't it? Is it the great escape when he's like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, of those kind of things, I think that's going to slip into that drawer. You've got a ball draw. We've got a ball draw, yeah. That is like, that's like the one item, isn't it?

Is it the great escape when he's going in the home? Yeah. Like lob him a ball and it's true. It's like saying you had to throw me one item to keep me entertained. It'd be my phone. But, you know, a ball, a ball. It'd be a snack, but I'll be on that. You know a ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball.

A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball.

A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball.

A ball. A ball. A ball. A ball. A list. Yes, that's it. I am gonna ball in the Bible. Oh. When I did a kid show in Edinburgh a few years ago and one of the scenes had these bouncing balls in them. And so I went to the juggling shopping Edinburgh and they have these incredibly satisfying bouncing balls

that are like professional bouncing balls. They were like 14 quid each. And, oh my God, the weight of these things and the bounce of these things were sensational. So I bought myself one. I bought two for the show and I bought myself one. And I just had the, just a lovely time. You had the best month of your life, didn't you?

Yeah, and then I got home and I realized you hadn't performed in any other shows because he's a bit handsome, but all he wants is a fricante. He bounced your ass right onto the sleeper. It was something I was supposed to do. I got home and I was like, this is great. I think it really calms me down. And it gives me something to do. And I spent less time on my phone. And whenever we were in company, Jane would say,

oh, Tom's got a new affectation. I've never got the power. Oh yeah. She was like, this is Tom's new affectation. And nothing stopped me using the ball quicker than that. It was like she knew, she knew exactly what to say to stop me using the ball.

I've still got the ball. I found it the other day, it popped, popped its head right in the corner, and I was like, it's behind the kettle, I haven't found it. I haven't seen it for a long time, I moved the kettle. Hello. Hello. It was behind the kettle, I haven't found it. I haven't seen it for a long time, and I moved the kettle. Hello. Hello. It's behind the kettle. Hello, hon, friend.

The other kettle is like, hello, hon, friend. I realized I've hidden it. I've hidden it because Gloria got, it's too weighty for a two-year-old. But yeah, you've been decent at this. Kids know good balls, you know what I mean? Like, you could tell when she found it, she was like, oh, hello.

You can't tell anything. I have to find anyone to hold one of these and be like, not be like, hello. So it's interesting that you brought that up because... You have a similar bet for anyone to pick up the telephone as well, don't you? And not be like, hello. Oh hello. Hello.

Who's phone's this? Um, it's affectations this? But it like, it was lovely. But you can't carry on. Want something to be deemed an affectation then you're pretty much done for, aren't you? That's it. You have to pop it back into your trail, be happy.

Put it in the drawer with your wallet trade. Check it from watch. Yeah, just, you recycle off into the distance. Oh. To the next team, punk event. So that was, that's in there. I'm just saying like, don't you keep that ball because it might, you know, it might become that ball for, you know, your kids. For someone become that ball for someone's ball.

Yeah exactly. So that's going to be sort of put into the ball draw. That is a puppy's approved item there. Okay that's a puppy's approved. Right. The next thing and I think this is the closest I came to throwing one of the items in the bin. But was... You were saying throwing up then. It was a severed finger. OK. It was actually, you know, that picture they put on the side of the cigarette packet because he's lungs. I thought, come on, there's no way, she's three years old, she's not going to take up

smoking, there's no to scare us straight at this age. How would you put those on candy cigarettes? Surely. If you go too hard at this edge. Which would be to put those on candy cigarettes, you know what I mean? If you go too hard at this party, your lungs will look like this. If you scream too loud during our games. That's not a bad idea. These are the lungs of someone who spent seven minutes on the bouncy castle and opposed to fire.

The rules are there for a reason. Who left their shoes on? So anyway, this was a small eraser with a picture of Elsa from Frozen on it. Now I love Frozen, but it is Tat. It's one of those things that will tear the paper before it removes the pencil mark. So that was, but it's still it's a razor with two sharp corners. Yes, it's a little circle, it's a little circular disc, but it's like a minihockey part. I'm not matching the edge between that plane and that plane, I imagine it being quite... Yeah, the exo-wai-axe. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All four. It's angles, it's users.

It's definitely tap, but at the same time, I'm sure if you gave it to Cleo, who, let's face it, can't write at this stage. So she'd just be happy to have a little bit of, of, of Elcid a carry round with her. But I haven't, I've kept that. It's all still somewhere, but then... Can we, you also know?

Yeah. P know pursue the satisfaction of going back to pencils and erasers in adult life? Because that feels like, again, much like a wholesome, healthy, weighty ball, going back to a well sharpened pencil. Oh, and sharpening the pencil. Yeah, absolutely. Sharpening a pencil and a razor that has beveled edges and just cleans it away.

Good Lord. Genuinely, it gave me like a, what's the word for the guy who said taste or make you remember stuff? Proustion. It's proustion. Proustion. Yeah, you remember some things past, yeah. You can go to crowds, I think, you know. I don't think, I would imagine. I would imagine.

It's... That's what I was going to say. So, Faustion. Or Pavlovion. Faust Pavlov and Proust could all be the same, but he put him in my head. It was the one who had the Katana box as well. Yeah, Chuck him in there as well. Chuck Holt Shrodinger in there as well. Chuck Holt is in there, we don't know.

Is he in there but it won't stay? I didn't know Shroding was American. But anyway, so, but I digress. But I digress. Put a memory. Put a memory. Put a memory of things past, as Proust used to say. So, final, final, final light time. Okay, we're one all at the moment, aren't we?

And I think the final item is still. I mean, I kind of, with you, Crossby, I'm finding out that I'm pretty bad with that as well. I just don't want to find out what that is. The house is full of, the house is full of tap. But the way I look at it, these tatty items, you play with them until you break them, which is later that day and then you throw them away.

At least get a little bit of play out of them. And the final item though, was, even I said to Charlotte at the time, I don't wanna throw this away, I'm gonna be working with a friend tomorrow, I'm gonna give it to them. I don't know why I said that, because they don't want it. They've also got kids, they don't want this stuff. If I show up with that because they don't want it. They've also got kids, they don't want this stuff.

If I show up with this, they don't want it. But in a way, they kind of do. Right, see if you remember these guys, because Charlie had not seen these guys before. Little man with globules of, yeah, you know, I'm talking about. Little man. Little man with globules of sticky rubber, squishy sticky rubber on his hands and feet, I'm talking about. I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about,

I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about,

I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about,

I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm to Charlie, I want to give this to my friend, Cleo, so it said, what's this? And I went, I'll show you. Tour the little packet open and we had a great day.

It was, obviously it was, throw it on the window, flop, flop, flop, it flops down into the cat hair, go and run it under the tap, throw it at the window, flop, flop, flop, flop. But it was so satisfying, but undoubtedly, tat, right? Yes. Absolute pointless piece of nonsense. It was so satisfying but undoubtedly Tad right yes absolute Pointless piece in nonsense But that guy that guy feels more like an event than an object right like he's done though

Yeah, he had his moment in the sun. Yeah, they never sustained but for that initial I had loads of those that never lasted beyond a day No, yeah, but because even every time you wash them, you think, I'm just washing off the cat hair. You're also sort of washing off some of the sticky of the rubber until eventually it's just complete. And also, you don't want to see dudes like that wash. You know what I mean? You don't want to see evil, connevil after the jump, do you?

You don't want to, you don't want to send time, sorry, fucking. Yeah, you don't want to see behind. You don't want to be with a strong man, shaving his armpits. You just want the event. tie, we're not fucking. Yeah, you don't want to see behind. You don't want to be with the strong man, you're shaving his armpits. You just want the event. You want them to come out.

Modern day gladiators, Johnnie. You don't want their private life. You know what I mean? They're in the arena and then they do their thing. Yeah, man. I totally don't even need the little plastic things for the day. I mean, it's a mystical fucking event.

You don't want to pin behind the curtain of the little... You don't want it, yeah, exactly. Part of the reason. Part of the reason Tom is so anxious about his career is because he's currently repitching modern-day gladiators. He's bought the rights and he said, instead of getting Jett and Wolf and Hunter and all that paper, we're going to get... Oh, I tell you, a charm strong...

No, do you think this is a doable is a doable thing right? A human version of that. Right, so you're in your in basic like a giant catapult, but instead of your hands in your feet you've got big globules of rubber and they fire you up against a wall. Do you think that would be like for stagdows? I like it definitely people would die. Almost certainly. Someone's breaking their back, they have to call the whole thing off. Oh shit. But it's a good idea though, right? One stag, just one booking. Yeah, because it's a bit like, when they try to like the Velcro suits thing.

Yeah, I went to a few, I think certainly at university, they had the Velcro suits thing at the Leavers Ball one year. Cause what was that? Well, there were two different versions of it. There was one where you jumped onto a trampoline, you were in a Velcro suit and you leapt up onto the wall. You could either do a flip onto the wall, so you'd end up upside down.

Of course I'm not doing that. I'm barely making the wall. But it was, you splat yourself against the wall. The other thing was, and this is the one they had at the Leavers' ball, was you were attached to a bungee rope. And so you would run along the thing and you would try and they had at the Leavers' Ball, was you were attached to a bungee rope, and so you would run along the thing, and you would try and throw yourself at the wall, and stick to the wall before the bungee rope,

whew, yadge you back to where you started. Oh, all right. They were all the rage, weren't they, for about five years? I reckon from like 2002 to 2007. That was like the pinnacle of a night out, like, you know, the novelty of like a thing It was that and the and the and the sumo suits and the suits yet They're the no suits for the category. It's no it's axe throwing. Yes

Paul and axe throw in Yeah, been replaced have you have you been to an axe throwing if you've been to an axe throwing place before would you Would you think it's the sort of thing you'd enjoy going to? No, I think I'd hate it. Why would you hate it? I think it's more deasthetic than the actual act. That you would hate. You wouldn't enjoy the aesthetic or you wouldn't enjoy the...

I just don't like how it's been pitched. I don't like the idea. You know how the axe is being pitched? It's a war's ye. I don't understand it. I fling myself at an axe while I was covered in velcro. Could you combine the two? Where the idea is, you fling yourself

on one of those rotating things and someone throws an axe at you and the idea is not to hit you. You can. I know what I do with the hook, but no, it's not the smartest idea. If you also then involve pictures of Miller Light, it's probably not a strong idea. And that's another thing.

I mean, you've got a beef with how they sharpen the axes. Is that it? You've got a real problem with that. You've got a real, yes, that's it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a phrase for it, but I can't think. I can't quite think of it. So, why don't you like the idea of that axe ring?

I think because it was kind of more considered like kind of like... We've booked your all stacked in. LAUGHTER And it's four days of extra after we after we couldn't get the insurance on my idea of attaching rubber globules to your feet and hands and firing you at the whitecliffs today over fired by donkeys it's cut reported by donkeys basically we put cut up all to by Donkeys, basically.

We put some stats about Liz Truss on your back and front. And we fired you in the white case of Dover and as you come down, they're kind of like you're quite spectacular. It's a hell of a way to go, actually. Yeah, that would remind me of it, I would. Yeah, you'd hate it. And then you're just lobbing axes that like projected cues of Laurie's going to time.

Basically, we've got led by Donkeys to organise. If you've not heard of led by Donkeys, guys, this rift's not really going to work for you, but if you heard of it, then boy oh boy. But at least you can enjoy the bit of better razors. Yeah. What would you say to Roman? I mean, she's probably nothing at all. Do you want to see what the world is really like?

Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman planting her course to free to pat and not fall. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things. It's non-stop bunkers brilliance. I love that. Poor things. It's like theaters, December 15th. Yeah, go, what is it, Clarky? Because I feel like this is the sort of thing

that I could see. I could imagine being a fun night out, you know, the three of us. I mean, you're probably right. I just, I think it just, I think the first time I saw it advertised, it was just very kind of smug. This is one of these things I think.

Again, why do you not enjoy that? What? What? I kind of feel like Darnatsu is better. Oh yeah, have you been to flight club? One of those places. That's happened to that, yeah. Which again, it's not the same as those places. What happened to that? Yeah.

Which right again is not the same as Darts. No, but that's good fun. They've judged it up in a fun way. This just feels like, come on. But it's a thing you never get to do that a lot of people would like to do. Oh, you never thought I'd. Never thought I'd never throw it. Oh mate.

Well, that's it. She'd come down to the park with me. Not the X-axis or the Y-axis. I'm not throwing either of it. Not come down to the park, we're met. Not the X-axis or the Y-axis, and not throw any either of it, not E-O. I've never done that. And I think that's what it does appeal to me for that reason. I've never been invited to a thing.

It just think, you know, for one night, try to have a swing on a big beer style and lob an axe at a wall. It sounds good fun, man. Also, I'd be careful about extolling the virtues of dance because the idea of dance is better. Put the reality of dance. Write the reality being in the pub

and having a game of dance. That's true. Is actually one of the most humiliating experiences of a man's life. Unless you've spent 15 years playing darts. There's like darts and snooker where the idea of them are incredible and the actuality of them are humbling. Nothing short of humbling.

They both feel like things that, you know, when you play in pool you normally get better as the night progresses and until you get to the point where you're like all suddenly I'm battered and this is just chaos but I feel like those you instantly get worse. I think it's nerve-wracking as well. Tells something about there's something about, it's not nerve-wracking to throw a dart, obviously. But it is, it feels very, it's for some reason, it feels like it's very exposed, especially if you're in a pub, you feel like you're wasting, you know, like you feel like you're wasting time. No one's really watching a game of pool or a game of, you know, no one's really seeing what you're doing. If you're taking ages that knows we're noticing. But we notice cross-bree. I mean, yeah, we're waiting. We're next up. Well, that's that's part of the reason. Like, I

basically, my wife and I are evenly pitched at pool. We're both dog shit, right? But we're dog shit. At the right level, we do enjoy it. When I went on a holiday with my family recently, When I went on a whole day with my family recently, there was a pool table and we snuck away to try and play pool and the second more people joined, like the second my nephew joined, who's, you know, he's an early teenager, he's not an intimidating guy, but the already dog shit game we were playing fell apart even more. It's embarrassing, that's him it's him it's embarrassing So that's what you want you want people. That's why you know, that's why I know I don't very rarely play it With any one of them Charlie because we're just you know we're at the right level for each other. We need easier pub games

You can't get it wrong. You can't get it wrong I mean you can get it wrong. You can't get it wrong. You can't get it wrong. It's true. I mean, you can get it wrong, but then. Is your beef with axe throwing the, like, the Viking kind of hip-story element of it? Is that what it is? Yeah. There's not what you're getting at, is that? I think it's a guy's with the angled beards.

Yeah. And, you know, that's what I'm doing. Like, loud and noxious people being loud and I'm noxious. Have you ever been out drinking with yourself? Clarky. Have you ever met yourself after two points? Exactly. That's why you say you're like, oh Clark, I would have thought you'd like that. And it's like, yeah, that's that I'm the kind of person I'm trying to avoid. You know, one of the loving to a club that was run by you, basically.

I guess, I think the thing about Armstrong is, I feel like once you've done it, once, you're not going to want to do it again. Right. Yeah, I can see that. You're not going to be like, I'm taking this up. I'm coming every week. Yeah, it's going to be an Olympic sport one day. Like, it's not, I don't think it's going to,

but I just think you just want that one moment, don't you? Ugh. Yeah, you want to do it once. You basically want to do it. It's if you've ever had to, if you've ever had to chop wood, it's the end of chopping wood, isn't it? Where you throw the axe back to the stump. I think I know what it is, Clarky. I think the thought of the guy who does it all the time

doing the demonstration and showing you how it's done, that fucking guy. Fuck that. Is it John and me? So, basically, it's going to look like Clarky, fit younger, bit better in the shoulders. Bigger beard. Bigger beard. A little bit more handsome. Yeah. And definitely a little bit more handsome. Yeah. And definitely a little bit more confident. Yeah. He's going to kind of touch your partner's elbow just to help her, just to stand slightly.

He's going to show you how it's done. Yeah. And then he's going to whack it straight through the ball's eye and he's under your skin. Yeah. Maybe that's it. I think it's that guy. He'll be called like J-FF or something like that. J-FF one of Noah's sons. Yeah, one of Noah's sons is exactly Shem, Ham, J-FF one and three.

I said I'd have to want to fucking... I know Clark is old, but... I know Clark is a little guy, but... Hey, J-FF's not a little bit younger than Clark. No, listen, no, Noah, son's new outer swinging axe. I can't imagine. He did number one thing. They knew one thing.

I tell you what though, they, they really had to stop the old axe throwing, what's they got aboard the arc. The first game's nights. Well, originally there were five of every animal. I love a barbecue, that's her. Well originally there were five of every animal. LAUGHTER I love a barbecue that's ugly. LAUGHTER The animals are always trying to get the truth told about that story.

Two by two you fucking gums. Scum! Where do you think Billton comes from? Just laid our heads out. You told him to bring the whole family? It's so into a two by four. The advertisers are family cruise. So sorry, I've lost my way a bit.

The third item in this party bag was a throwing axe. Yeah, that's right. So yeah, small bottle of whiskey, throw an axe and some tang fastic. And I thought, come on, we need to use this. Oh, well, come on guys, come on. Talking of the ax throwing, I was working in Camden a couple of years ago. I had a week's work.

Selling weed. Yeah, that's what I said. Yeah, I love it. It's an up and down career, isn't it? We've been chasing for ourselves. Folling t-shirts? Folling t-shirts, floggy weed. Yeah, as you know Tom, I was selling bowl of hats

with goggles on the top. I'm not kidding. You gave me a very good deal, my leg. It's that t-shirt. You don't have rubber balls as well, do you? OK, I don't worry, I don't worry. Don't worry, I've got plenty. I've got all suck of them.

I was working two doors down from a gun range, right? Now I didn't know this. There's a gun range in Camden. I didn't know that. No, I wouldn't have known where we're not working two doors down from it. So on the last day, I thought, during my lunch break, I'm just going to do it. I'm going to go down there. I'm going to book a half an hour, I'm gonna fire a gun.

Because when else are you gonna be in Cundin' Jeremy? You got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that.

You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage of that. You've got to take advantage this hour. You know, I don't need that long for my lunch break.

I can go in a fire of gun for half an hour and then I eat a sandwich for the other half, right? And I was really excited about really geared up for it. But on the day, the last day of the job, they needed me to work through lunch. So I wasn't able to do it. It was a hard one, mate. And, but now, in the back of my mind,

I've always thought, Super. It really, really joined a union, man. Join a union. This is Truss' union. Listen, read my back, I've always thought... Super. It would be a very... Join a union, man. Join a union. This is Trust's union. Listen, read my back while I slide down the cliff, so I'm dove. I'm constantly...

Constantly... Constantly... It's the show, yeah. Hour working. Wait, all these bags gone! I can't make it, I'm telling you. So you have stopped from going to the gun range? Stop from going to the gun range, but it stayed with me.

I'm sort of, I mean, literally then we had a pandemic and I've never worked outside of the house since. But I'm sorry. So you still got that booking. You still got that booking, is it? Yeah, it's a roll ever. I've still got the vouchers. It's got to be worth the hours now.

But yeah, I've always sort of had that in the back of my mind. I was thinking about today, actually, I was thinking, is there ever a time now? You know, like life moves on a bit, doesn't it? You know, you've got kids, you think I can't really say to... It's too late for me to get into guns. It's just gone. And all I want to do is fire a gun for... It's too late for me to get into guns. It's just gun. You've missed the button.

So, and that, all I want to do is fire a gun for. No, the reason I thought of that is because you said, like, once you do it, you go, well, that's it, I've done that thing. And I think that's in my mind what I thought about fire in a gun, but then it might not be the case. You might have gone to that gun range, I might have fired a gun, and I might have become, you know,

a gun, I've started a militia. A nut, it's nut, isn't it? It's always a nut. You become a nut with a gun. It's always a nut. Yeah, it's your action. And cross people, you'd be a very unlikely gun nut crossbow, I'd say. Did they do nut guns? That feels like a marks an opportunity. I don't know, what were people's allergies and stuff? You're deadly? Yeah, if one went off, if one went off on a crowded train.

So, so, um, Clark, you've been to a good range, right? I've done clay pigeon shooting. How was that? With your good self. Yeah, really fun, actually. That feels like, that feels more wholesome. That feels like that feels like that feels more wholesome. That can't be right. It's a sport. The country side isn't it, you know. Yeah. And you're like, I've done a good rage. I thought you did don't want in the state.

That's why I was asking. No, no. I think running Texas. Did you? It was horrible. Yeah. Yeah, I can imagine it being horrible. I don't think I'd enjoy it. It just, it just, it was like a, it was kind of like a kind of a stag do. So it was like three of us and it was like, and let's just go to a gun range. But obviously in Texas, it's less of a novelty really. And you just kind of walk in off you go. And obviously they're trying to sell you a hell of guns

as well. So it's kind of like a sales pitch, not an expit. It's not like, oh right. It's a bit like taking a copper test drive or whatever. Yeah, it's a gun shop and at the back they've got a range. That's like most gun shops have a range out the backing text. So it's like pretty much at the end of a shopping mall and then you go.

And so they're constantly trying to tell you like, this is great, this guy was telling you this, apparently this is great. It's awesome. By the way, that's how you, if you have a gun range, you'd be like, guys, this is great. Guys, honestly, can I just tell you guys, this is great.

You got the three of you here about to buy a gun. This, nothing could be more great than this. This is great. Anyway, this is in a sort rifle. Yeah, not literally going like, no, this one's, I use this to kill, fucking, and it's like, this one'll get you to, you can go to the top end,

end the center please. Because I use this to kill is not. He was like, I use this to kill pigs. Okay. And he was like, I'm not great, but yeah, really like, I used to kill is not. I used this to kill pigs. And he was like, I'm not great, but yeah. Really like, really explodes out their heads and stuff like that. And he was like, oh, God. And then he's saying stuff like, this one will get you to your car.

And then in an incident. And then you get this one out. And this one's the one. This one's for defense to get to your car. And then this one is to go on the offensive with. And it's just like I fucking mad Stundin Discombobulated him those five bullets to the chest

This was really do the job this will get you to your car and of course your car is full of axes God Oh god, all kind of mental. It's a different, it's bleak stuff. And then you hold it and you kind of, it's that sense of like what you have the power you have and what it can do and fucking hell, like we killed seven people. Well that was just getting to the car, wasn't it?

We have to get back to the car somehow. It's only been three, but we couldn't say anymore. We were, did we park? Oh, he's fucking cars looking the same. Instead of clicking the keys to hit the blip noise, you were just firing a gun into the sky, weren't you? Like it was Sinko Damiya. What's the stat on firing guns into the air on Sinko Damiya? It's like, because they killed, aren't they? They killed coming back down.

Oh, we've discussed. We've talked about this before. We've talked about this on the Patreon, yeah. I still got bullshit on that. Well, if anyone wants to find out, the truth is, yeah. Don't fire an axe into the air clarky. You'll never do. No.

To Ben, he's getting married everyone. No! No! If a bullet is 50-50, then I don't think an axe is. You've got to, you've got to hope for the handle. Pour an axe into the ground for Clarky, man. A single man no longer. He's been split down the middle like, like Fantasia.

There's now two Clarkies. Did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did I've recently purchased 40 magnets and they are maybe one of your affectations guys. Okay, what these magnets look like? Are you talking about like a little horseshoe shape magnet like that, like a cartoon? I had a classic case of bad internet shopping basically. I recently purchased some whiteboards. The guy told me they were magnetic I needed them to be magnetic so I put them up and I was very excited myself I ordered 40 magnets off the internet ran to my shed and chucked them at the board and there's a board on magnet. Oh, I can't see it. Absolutely. He's fucking me. He's fucking me.

Please, Tom, did he sell your paper? He's fucked me. Just really thick paper. Have you checked the magnets? They're definitely magnets. Yeah. You've been sold some paper and some paper clips. Yeah, I mean, well, the silver lining is magnets.

I like it. That's so good. So, and also, right, so it was one of those things where like, if you go on, if you go on, you know, I'm gonna say Amazon Prime, but other shopping outlets are on the internet. You get 40 magnets for £4.75 and I was like, oh my God, that's such a bargain.

And then they arrived in like an envelope, the size of like half the palm of my hand basically. And I was like, there's 40 magnets in there. And the magnets, the magnets, are like, I'd say, the size of the top of a pen, like the diameter of the top of a pen. They're like mini, then mini magnet, there's tiny mini magnets, right? Maybe if all's are magnetic, you just do magnets and do small things. No, no, no, but here's the thing, they're strong magnets.

So they're like tiny, strong magnets. And so like you just can be like like they fiddle around them, they're all magnetizing around. Okay, couple of things. First thing I think I would do with two strong magnets, right? I mean, the other 38 are up for grabs, but the first thing I'd do is, did you make yourself a little earring? Yeah, so I look cool. You go through the earring. Did you make yourself a little earring? Yeah, so I look cool. You've got to do the earring. I'm going to sort of do the earring.

So that's all coincides with glorious, discovered fridge magnets. So everywhere we go, we're picking up fridge magnets. Great. And you just go like, so my solution for party bags, I was already thinking for Glow's party bags, I was thinking someone's got, I've got to do something magnets

But um these tiny Yeah, you can't give them to no no no Tom. I'll tell you now you cannot give Magnet I've got I've got 40 of them Little spiky magnet fucking on Paris. You just did a little magnet Her age is after chop a grape in quarters. You can't give her a fucking tiny magnet. She's gonna stick in a minuscule windpipe. Oh, no, no, no.

Good to meet you. I've been ripped off by my boards, haven't I? Just washed this down. I've nail polish, I've given it here. But fucking hell, magnets are so good. And I, like, what it got me thinking was like, why, with globy, like, enthralled to them now, magnets are so good and I like what it got me thinking was like why with globy and like in throw to them now and then me getting these 40 brilliant little ones I was like why isn't our society like fucking based around magnets

like the insane clown pop and how do they work? Okay, Tom. I think I know the answer to your question, but can I hear the question again please? Well, for example, what time for the record? You know when you're sitting down on the floor, right? You're not going to be able to play on the floor. I'm on a stall now.

I'm on a stall now. Yeah, why are your trousers not made out of magnets? It's a chocolate they off the ceiling. Clark is spent like, whatever, 30 quid on a camping stool that you have to erect with like rods and stuff. Why aren't we in in some kind of world where you took a magnetic plate on the floor, you sit on a magnetic plate and you just like floating around. Why aren't we floating everywhere? Why aren't we magnetised to shit out of us? Oh I see. So you're talking about putting the repelling each other so that you can just sit on top and hover.

But I like it. It has both. Why are we still... Tom. Why is boy's gloom still a thing when you can use the... I like it. It's so much... You can magnetise. First of all, why are you sat on a chair that's held together with glue? As I could be. Yeah. Because I chose a career that placed in the shadow. Dance. You should.

I should say you're doubting about the wrong things. I think you should place your doubt in magnets. I really enjoy this, Tom, but I do have to admit. I did see yesterday a window cleaning thing where it was two magnetic things so you could clean the inside and outside of your window simultaneously and if you're in an upstairs room I was like how was this never like this is this is genius, but how has no one ever thought of this before? And I had a very similar thought.

Yeah, must be. Well, we've got like, I think we could come out of this as like the Elon Musk. Elon Musk Magnet. Yeah, Elon Magnet, yeah. That's right. Elon Musk Magnet. Elon Musk magnet. Elon Musk magnet. What?

Okay, a little edit point, because I think you don't mind Clark, he probably wants to hit that live, so can you say, why are we not the Elon Musk magnet? Or 2022? I think if we got enough people in a room, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, man. Oh, man. We just, we, we, we, because we find it quite funny. We have like the facial hair stuff. I don't know if there's a lecture on that. Yeah, there's stuff on that. I mean, I just feel like.

So you're talking about like Etchersketch, fridge magnet, it's all that kind of stuff, putting stuff up on a notice board. That's like, that's like, we're not a notice board. I'm just, I'm just gonna say that. That's the basic stuff, but we've fallen at the first time. We can't even do that. Thomas is an actual magnet.

Thomas goes, why do we buy a wooden fridge? Of all the things he's waiting for. What a persuasive carpet he was at the Carpet & Grange. Where he asked me how I was, a big part of it was like, I thought once I get my magnets, my life, I'll be able to organize my life. It's all falling apart, it's falling down around this guy. So now I'm like, do I, I'm not getting to this, this is, this is the one. No, no, no, it's just podcast, but it's like, I think it is.

I've installed this final episode. I've installed this final episode. I think you know very well how to finish a podcast, but we're too bloody minded to stop. The phone powering in his shed, he got two really strong magnets on his head. So goodbye, crawl world. He had such a, we thought it was Nicholas Lindtuss, we were your first round, he was so thin. He used 40 tiny magnets to get to his car,

pulled out his massive. These are the magnets that I'll get you to car. But with your pocket, they'll essentially guide you. Put them in the pocket, they will erase all your credit cards. Like they don't hurt you do that. Like there's no harmful, if you're arrayed magnets too much, they're not going to like, you know, you're not going to, you know, it depends, I guess, if you've got fire in blanks or something. If you've got, I'm, I'm, is it like are they going to make you sterile? I don't, I don't think so. I'm asking for a friend. sterile I don't I don't think so but I'm asking for a friend

was it just was it just an earring you made Tom Tom please don't be just an earring of course it wasn't just an earring oh Tom don't tell me you did a prince Albert magnet a prince Albert Magnet Prince Albert must magnet I'm asking for a friend who's sound of magnetic plates I think above another magnetic plate and only wearing pants Only wearing steel pants It's... Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Well anyway, that's put magnets in there in your party bug. So yeah, so just to finish things off, how are you with throwing away tap? What? What?

What? What? What? I can tell you how I am with throwing away two whiteboards. What? How do they make bread and no wheat? How do they? Wow, where?

There we go. There we go. There we go. Some really great moments there I thought. What? What? What? What? How do they make bread and no wheat? How easy! Wow, where you go? There we go. There we go. Some really great moments there, I thought, really.

Ha ha ha ha. A classic idea. I'd say it was an instant classic, yeah. An instant classic. Once we stopped recording, we had a very serious chat about what I really should do about the whiteboards. Yeah, it's a good question. What do you think Tom should do? Papysflatshareatgmail.com. Should he about the whiteboards. Yeah, it's a good question. What do you think Tom should do?

Papisflatshareatgmail.com, should he return the whiteboards? And as always, how baggy, do you include how baggy your inner ears are? Please tell us this. Is there a way to magnetize a non-magnetic whiteboard? Has that science been discovered yet? It's got to be.

If it's metal, you can magnetize metal, can't you? You can make it an electron magnet. I don't think the main problem is that they're not metal. Or they're not metal, they're not even metal. That's cheaply the problem. Oh, that's it, isn't it, of course. So what's it made up then? No, it's not.

So what was going on with this compensator? These plastic boards. They're plastic, aren't they? They're plastic. I just chewed because he'd talk. He'd said he'd say. I don't plastic, oh my yeah, they're plastic. I just chewed, because he taught. He said, he said. I don't get it too, I've got it in here.

I would have thought the same. Are they magnetic? Yes, they are magnetic. I'll do two for eight equids. That's what he's written. I've got it in front of me. I've been drafting the email, I'll do it in the picture.

I'm gonna record it. I'm gonna record it. I'm gonna record it. I'm gonna record it. Anywho. If you know, if you know where a Tom can get a better deal than that, do get in touch. PappiesFlatShare at gmail.com because he's in the market for a couple. Or maybe he isn't, who knows. What should he do? Right, don't forget, of course, to join the Patreon.com forward slash Pappies FlatShare.

If you are interested in what the Patreon sounds like, it sounds a bit like this. Everything in my life, technology-wise, is falling apart, by the way. This is the most in the world. Well, the O on my MacBook Air has stopped working. Oh no! Oh no!

He's getting a new laptop. Getting a new laptop for the love of God. How old is that laptop? Give it. What, you get a new laptop because Get a new laptop for the love of God. How old is that laptop? Give it. What, you get a new laptop because the old doesn't work. No, you get a new laptop because your laptop's like over like 15 years old. Listen, no, no, no, no, no.

When the laptop gives up, then I give up on it. But at the moment, I'm not gonna trade in my laptop just because the old doesn't work. Yeah, but how's the battery life on it? The battery life's 100%. I mean, when you unplug it, how long does the battery life? Like, I mean, two hours, maybe. Two, two, maybe.

But I don't go anywhere, Clark. I don't know. I don't leave the house, mate. I'm permanently next to a socket. Listen, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don. Listen, I don't even know. I don't even know how long I've been in the expo-

You're not going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo-

I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo-

I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me expo- I'm going to let me today because when I'm typing into it, I've got a really hammered that okay. I don't know what's wrong with it. You can lift them up and who's around the need for it. I've had a little scoop around underneath that work for a bit, but are you trying copy and pasting a no? Oh yeah, don't you worry about that. Yeah, yeah, that's what I was working yesterday. Have you thought about just getting the next external keyboard you can plug in for now?

It's not a terrible idea. Might do that. You can copy and paste you on. Yep. I can do that. That'll be cheaper than the top. I also can recommend them for your posture as well. Yeah, because you've got your screen

in high. It's not a bad idea, is it? I've not looked back. I did it about three years ago. Well, that's because you're back with so bad, wasn't it? I can't look back. I can't look back, yeah. I can't tell my next sees. Well, I see you as a hump. My hump. I love the lady's arms.

So that sounds fun. Yeah. Certainly worth getting to Papi's to Patreon.com forward slash Papi's flat share and joining the fun over there. Yes. Right. Well, any other orders of business, Clarkie? Love you. Love you guys.

Love you guys. Love you guys. Love you guys. Any of the listeners, of course, yeah? Yes, of course. Today's episode was produced by Emma Corsham. Corsham team. Cheers everyone.

Bye. Bye. Okay, for sale, the Patreon neighborhood watch Roll Call. Roll up, roll up, roll up, roll up. Here we go, here we go. What have I got for you? It's such a bargain. You'll think, come a tosser. Give me seven quid, you get to notch off Brian Rossa.

Roll up, roll up, roll up, roll up. That's a lovely deal, I've got a spare seven quid. Two for a pair, two for a pound. What do you get to do to Bryn Rossa though? That's the question. That's always the same thing. He gets to, oh, listen. He gets to watch. He watches for his. Wait, I think it's more of an adjudicated and they relate to make sure everything. Can I ask, I'll bring Ross and Brian Ross are

related because why is Brin watching? I can't get into that. I'm not going to get into that. It's cool. If you want to know that, it's Brin watch. He does a little program on YouTube. He's got Brin watch. He's hiding easy grove. He's got his binoculars that easy grove. Yeah anyway, right okay, but yeah anyway, seven quid for Brian 10 for Britain right anyway, anyway, let me tell you now. Oh, I've got I've got a great offer You know I'll say you are I it's not it's not quid. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's gonna be 50 quid, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's not gonna be 50 quid, not even gonna breed 10 quid.

He's gonna be even less than that, he's gonna be one pound, I mean, that's just a sliver, isn't it? And you get a chance to, you get a chance to, I mean, it's not, it's not gonna sound that similar. You sure it's just sliver, you get a chance to see me mean it's not, it's only the sound of some of that. You sure as to sliver, you get a chance to see me not sure for a little bit. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Give one question there, as Bring got a bit of a view on proceedings. Yeah, Bring's web coming the whole affair.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course, I don't think it's that. 10 for 5, 10 for 5, come on, come on, 4 for a queue 15 for naught for a queue for a queue five for four yeah queue for you now now I'll tell you what you give me 20 quid yeah I'll tell you what's gonna happen okay I'll get a notch up in oh yeah great. A lot of clappin'. I love that. No, no, no, no. Everyone's getting lost off a 20-bit. No, no, no, no, no, no. Okay, from the man who sold you a microwave, from the man who gifted you a stove, you give

me 30 quid and I'll give you a powerl-eroy to me giving it all. Not your Michael Booth and goob-job. Yeah. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, And then afterwards you flip him over and give him a right good lickie and Of course do an extra twenty crew and I'll tell you I could I could see you in the corner Probably with his old egg and chips was was the absolute bumble a John McKinney Now of course we're working the shaft but let's not forget the ball. Never forget the ball. Look at this painting I've done a bit of Dominic all.

Oh that's awful the oil painting. I give you 69 quid for it. Oh no. It's too realistic Dominic. Listen, if I give you 20 quid, will you read this description of how my Balox ruptured? LAUGHTER Basically, I was in a garage with some helium loads

and some kind of swing device with Wilco-kinetic sculpture. Basically I was in a garage with some helium balloons and Sun kind of swing device with Wilco, kinetic sculpture Yo, it's a grimy business. You are a me out of these I tell you what, I read that description, I'll say that right now. I read, I read, I read, I read, I paid you 45 pounds to read description, you know, your ball's ruptured. Oh, no, it's not. It's a pretty, it's a word to me, let me tell you.

Yeah, you've paid it, you've paid it an absolute picture with it. Well, I've, I've found it to the picture as well. That was the mistake. The words are bad enough. The oil painting was even worse. I tell you what, I tell you what, I looked at that picture and I shivered and I had to calm down by not shying off me all mate Dan Gibbos. It's so calming. Gibbos. It's like having a lava lamp in your gob, he really is. He's calming on the gob in it, he's like going to a spa.

I've been calling him a caranta. How are you doing? Oh, sometimes I just lie back at night, turn off all the lights, put on a white noise app, and do a big blow. Yeah, of course you do, yeah, yeah. On DARREN ANSLO. Oh, and why wouldn't you, honestly? Why wouldn't you, it's very, very...

I tell you what, I call it Darren Anslow, Darren Fartscop. LAUGHTER He's God's work intent, the dozen, OK, we have slow his answer. It's, honestly, he's God's like a traction engine, I love it. Right, listen guys, I was pounding away so I didn't stop to question whether I should. Oh no. Let me tell you something. It made for the most potent song.

Yeah! I'm written. I'd love to hear it. By Brin. That what I did to Craig Woods. Oh my God. Yeah. Oh.

It's so funny. It's so funny. I heard that. It. Oh, I heard that song honestly. I tell you what you were going hammering tongs on old Craigwood. You gave yourself a stitch. You had to be, you had to throw in the towel, be subbed out by old Ser Pilditch. He stepped in. He couldn't have been handled by a better man. It was a bad surprise. It's what he trained for. He couldn't have been handled by a better man. Anyway, guys, it's the rosers. I'm going out of here. It's what, Brind Rosas.

Get my ginsengoc off. It's what Brind Ross is. Come on, come on, come on, get to my call! It's King Cleans today's patron, name and watch! Roll girl, Brind! Put the pen down! Run! He's got a pen! Oh God! Such a fine nib!

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Pass the audition! I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... to freedom at a lot more. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Poor things. It's like theaters, December 15th.