Pappy's Flatshare - Jinglenanny S10E52

Episode Date: December 29, 2020

Well, this is something different eh? We decided why not pick some of our favourite jingles from past Slamdown's and have a chat about them!Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you all Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

G-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d- So, Jingle Annie. Take a load off Jingle Annie. Take a load for free. Take a load of Jingle Annie. And put the load right on us three. So, yeah, so what we thought we'd do instead, because what we've done in the past is we've done a roundup of the year. We've done a roundup of the decade. Blimey. Neither of those have been, you know,, like great, yeah, it's on that

island. Yeah, I think when we did the roundup of the decade, we end up getting quite sad around sort of 2016 onwards. And let's not pick through the bones of this year. You will know why. But we thought we would go through some of the happier moments of the last 10 years, are jingles that we've created? There you go, exactly right. Just like Jules Holland will give you his hootie, and we're gonna be doing that

to celebrate the end of the year, treating our jingles like musical guests. Exactly. I as well, I say our jingles. I should say, I have no hand in the creation of any of these jingles at all. This is a, this is a, a, a, a, a Tom and Ben make them entirely themselves.

So I think for me to try and, I mean to try and bask in the glory by calling them our jingles is a little fucking rich. But, you're, you're amused. Matthew. Is that a fact? Yeah, actually right. I'm your plug-in baby. Yeah, we always We always picture you naked and then inspiration comes we should give you we should

Like the Beatles let Ringo have octopus is garden. Yes, we should give you a jingle one day. Do you think so? Yeah. Yeah, totally. I think we should. I would absolutely love it. You know, I love to sing. I've always have, always will. And yeah, I mean, I'd,

let's do it next episode, shall we? Not next, let's, some point, some point in the future. We'll get right to it. Let's not rush next episode, shall we? Right, next episode. There's some point. Some point in the future. We'll go right to it. Let's not rush into these things in. Let's not rush. It's not say hasty phrases like next episode. At the moment, it's a dream.

And dreams can come true. They will one day, hopefully, but you know, let's not go mental. I feel like what happened was you offered me something there and you've just whipped it away. It felt like a bit like, you know, a kid's birthday party when the kid sees the friend unwrapping the present that he's got for them and then he suddenly goes,

ah yeah actually I think that's, I think that water pistol's mine. You know, that sort of thing. I'm actually gonna take that, but I think my mom's made a mistake there. I'm actually gonna take that back. I think my arms made a mistake there. I think that's for me actually. I think that's for my birthday when it rolls around on June 6th.

I think the thing is, Crossbeat, you know, this is only like, what is this, like a 10th birthday? This is our, I guess it's our 9th birthday, yeah. This is our 9th birthday, you know, maybe one more 10. We're not even a teenager yet. So, I think it's a bit early doors for you. So you're telling me, I can do this in 2024. I can do a jingle in 2024.

Well, let's not rush into anything. Let's not rush into anything. No, come on, let's not. You're absolutely right. Well, four more years, four more years, everybody. Okay, well, let's not start looking forwards. Let's look backwards. That by the way is a great way to do a new year's episode. Guys, whatever you do, don't look forwards. Look back to 2011 when it was a simple time. So who's going to kick things off with that first jingle choice you do it Harry great

I have gone for camp of an Which if memory serves me correctly is our version of black Betty Where we're channeling that kind of rough and rude energy of the original and battering through a version of campervan. That's how I remember it. These are the kind of vocal performances that when I come to record them, I feel comfortably like into in my wheelhouse. Let's have a listen. Oh, gotta shoot it, camp of van, whoa, gotta shoot it, camp of van, body second hand,

camp of van, got some seven grand, camp of van, got no MOT, camp of van, bet stinks of weed, camp of van, roost the gate, camp of van, whoa, roost the gate, stinks of weed, Camp of Van Roosly gate, Camp of Van, Whoa Roosly gate, Camp of Van Got a hole in the floor, Camp of Van and only got one dog Camp of Van is covered in rust, Camp of Van and the fridge is butter Camp of Van, Whoa, Castigay, Camp of Van, Whoa, Castigay, Camp of Van Only got three wheels, Camp of Van and he can't cook meals Camp of Van is solo rent, Camp a van is your be a ten Camp a van, whoa!

That was absolutely wild, man. Too many songs have a proper ending and don't just stop. And that's what I like about that one. It's just like, let's just, we've done here, let's go. We're at the door, bomb. Like Van Marouss and offstage, bang! Straight into my like, because he'd mock we're done here, let's go, we're at the door, bomb. Like Van Morrison offstage, bang! Straight into my like, cause he'd mock it without a mask on.

Bang! He's done. He's done. Is that what Van Morrison does? No, he doesn't do any on call. I mean, I was literally thinking about his performance in the last Waltz, where he leaves halfway through the song and the band have to finish.

It's one of my favorite things in live performance, I've ever seen. Everyone's like, okay, he's off, he's gone. He's like midline. Halfway through singing the song he goes, oh come on, you've got the idea of this. Because there's something quite audacious about not doing an encore, that was a racist thing, wasn't it? They would never do an encore. That was one of their gimmicks. They were like, you know, you either want to see us, you don't want to see us, you know, like we'll play all the songs you want to hear and then we'll leave and then we'll go, yeah baby, I like that. It's like an anti-gimmick, isn't it? Yeah, the gimmick is, we don't have a gimmick. Yeah, because the encore is a gimmick, isn't

it? It's cool. And it's on cool. And on cool is a gimmick. Yeah, it long core is a gimmick isn't it? It's cool and it's on cool and on course of gimmick. Yeah, it's cool. Well, it's it's fake isn't it? Yeah, because you Yeah, because have you ever have you ever in your in your time as a comedy MC? Have you ever given someone on call? Have you ever... Hard in comedy. Do you think so? Yeah, definitely. Because you have to kind of... Like when you come on in music, you've got whatever it is.

Don't look back in anger. Yeah. Just primed to go and it's just like, well, here we go. Whereas if you're a comedian and you've just done your headline set, it's quite rare that you've gone, well I've sat on my best routine. And my best routine is just gonna pop itself out in a neat four minutes and then I'm gonna go.

Like you kind of have to start, you know, you have to kind of go again, work up a little bit then getting, it's not as, it's not as cut and shut as a musical on course. I feel bad, because I feel like, the question I was asking was, have you ever forced an encore on somebody who doesn't want one, it's what I meant?

Because that was what I used to do, I used to do that all the time to people. I used to do that all the time, someone would do their 20 minutes, then afterwards I come back on, and whether it would go well or badly, I would then say to the audience, who wants some more? Do you want to see some, I would usually do it to Joe Wilkinson because he hated it. Who wants a bit more Wilkinson? The audience wants

some more Wilkinson. He'd be off to the side of the stage shaking his head, but like, they want to come on guys and everyone applaud and then Wilkinson have to come out and do a Q&A. Yeah, really tough to do. Happy to do it though. Clarke, what was your choice? Oh first choice I've got. Well I've put it down as Christmas shallow. Love it. Let's hear it. Tell me Mrs. Claus, don't you sometimes wish we could press pause. It's Christmas time once more. And Rudor's waiting for me at the door.

I'm flying. Over the rooftops, they hear sleigh bells bringing such joy. But you need much more than just a toy. Tell me Santa, dear. Are you happy bringing Christmas cheer? It's cold in the snow. And your whole whole sound so hollow, I'm freezing Your grotto's got so cold when you're missing

I'm here But every old tide you'll not be near I'm married Chris Prinnell, he turned into Santa Strangely really not blind Spring all, each and every center, stranded in a land I've planned I'm lazy by self-observation of the bios, trapped in the North Pole is the North Pole And the North Pole is the North Pole And the North Pole is the North Pole Retracting the North Pole now That Christmas Shallow, genuinely, has become one of my year round year worms now.

I sing it all the time. That's really interesting because I've got a few of these in my list that I just I'm constantly singing. They're just always they're always in my head. Yeah, Christmas shallow has been with me for the whole year. I absolutely love it actually. That's one of my absolute faves as well. I was quite good at working on his list. I was like, ah!

You know, this isn't a competition. Everyone, we're just sharing our favorites here. It's not like... Oh, I got it. It's a Matt Hoss doing an individual episode, for each one? Oh, that's a deep ref. That's a ref for one person and that person is Matt Hoss.

Always good as well to get a clarky vocal performance, I think, on a jingle. Always enjoyable. It's a timely reminder to the listener that we do have a member who can sing absolutely properly. We just don't let him. Yeah. Apart from occasionally when he comes in and going it's like oh yeah actually that guy should be doing it all the time. Yeah. It's a it's a lesson to be learned but don't worry Clarky I believe you're going to get to sing another jingle in 2025. Oh cannot wait. Well you say can I wait. Don't let, Clarky, I believe you're going to get to sing another jingle in 2025. Oh, can I wait? Well, you say can I wait?

Let's not rush into it. It's very much a light pencil at the moment. No, this is not. Yeah. You know, I haven't done an audition in a long time, but that really takes me back. Well, in the spirit of healthy competition, Crossbow, what's your first selection? Here we go. I have picked, and this again, is an absolute year-round

earworm, as you said. This is caravan. Oh my God. Yes. Let's, sorry, yeah, a banger. What happened there is you've done a very professional radio DJ's introduction into the song and then we crushed it. That's fine. Do you know what? It's alright. It's nice to see the other side of professionalism.

That is what we offer. That is what we offer. Yeah, it's good. Should we hear it? Yeah, let's please caravan caravan caravan caravan caravan where will the action act when the sun goes down and the beach is wet where do we hear after the dark where the players at the caravan park party's kicking it's going full throttle got the stove connected to the gas bottle

Music cranks and the party jumping just to shame There's no room to stand up here This is my caravan, this is my caravan Caravan, you're my caravan woman I am your caravan Caravan, caravan Caravan Hereavan Caravan Here we go!

So grab your beer and drink your wine Limbo that retractable washing line Cause hate is gonna hate and play is gonna play And full the way tables get folded away It's the early hours but no one's young We got a dance floor going when I pop the horn Come on down show me what it's worth How 50 people in a 7 birth

This is my caravan This is my caravan You're my caravan, this is my caravan plan. You're my caravan woman, I am your caravan man. So there it is, the caravan and some real funk. Real proper funk. As it replace the original in your brain, that's when a jingle, when a jingle is really successful, it means that you don't go to uptown fun in your brain, you go to caravan.

Caravan, caravan. Caravan. Yeah, I mean, I never find myself singing uptown funk, but I often find myself just that caravan refrain, I often find myself singing that. Yeah, whenever someone says caravan in real life, no, that's what my brain does. If someone says I'm going to stay in the caravan, my brain says caravan in real life now, that's what my brain does. If someone says I'm going to stay in the caravan, my brain goes caravan. What you should be doing is thinking why is my wife walking out on me.

That's what you should be thinking there. Rather singing a jingle to yourself. Well, that's also the answer. The Uptown Funk, I remember being, what was it? My sister's wedding, and there was a karaoke... A jukebox, it wasn't karaoke. It was a jukebox, and Charlie was trying to work out what song to play, and she was like, I can't remember the name of it. It's that song that everyone everyone loves about fireman and we couldn't think of what it was and it was uptown funk Because it has the word fireman and at some point

I don't think if you were gonna, you know, I don't know when Bruno Mars and Mark Ront has sat down to write it They were like we've got to we've got to support our brave boys What I want to do is make London's burning the song and I don't mean the song London's burning, I mean the TV show in the burning. Rob said you're going famously beaten too, didn't they? Yeah. Good. Sorry, you know, go on.

I was about to start singing up on the ref, don't you worry about me. Right, so I have often said this, lad, lad babies about to have a run at his third Christmas number one with his sausage roll songs. Yeah, I couldn't believe it when I heard that. It was sort of like I was listening to the radio a couple of morning to go and it was just sort of, I was half listening to it and I thought, oh, Ronan Keating's done a sort of slowed down John Lewis version of Don't Stop Believing and then I heard every now and then he'd mention a sausage roll.

What's going on? Is it like the thing with the charts now, is if you look at what's in the chart, especially like we're recording this the week of Christmas, Christmas week. It's all old Christmas songs, and then a bunch of stuff that I've never heard of. And I mean, that's, that's, A, it's my age,

but it's also B, the charts aren't important anymore, are they? No. The charts, are it? I've found the charts, but all that. Are you, are the charts important if you're 15? Do you think, do you think 15 year olds are rooting for Lad, baby? I don't know, well, someone must be right.

Like, there's's someone's rooting for lad baby because he keeps doing it. He keeps doing it, he keeps doing it, he's doing it. Yeah, but doesn't it, doesn't it just mean he's sold like 15 records this year because no one cares about the charts? Is next year the year we make a serious run on Christmas number one? With caravan? With with with with something I mean we've got the goods right? I think this could be our year. It's not a you know it wouldn't be a bad year to dust off all the trimmings.

Oh I loved all the trimmings. I mean we haven't got all the trimmings to play today, have we? No, we probably shouldn't be mentioned in it. We could hunt out all the trimmings. That's very achievable. Should we stick in all the trimmings? We'll finish it. Should we stick it finishing it?

Yeah. At the end, we'll pop in all the trimmings as a little treat for the listener. I mean, the thing is as well though, if you haven't listened to the episode, the P-Bam episode with all the trimmings, like, it's absolutely gobbledygook, isn't it? As opposed to all the other stuff we're putting out here. Speaking of which, what's the next choice? The next choice I went for, what I would probably consider to be a rare groove, but oh wow, The reason I've picked it is because I remember it making me laugh, making myself laugh, and awful lot when I wrote it.

And so I thought that's good enough reason to see if it'll make me laugh again. It's Airbnb. Oh, I love it. Why are you there? You have found my envelope board that you booked on the website. Oh, I won't leave on that chair I've made a weave. Let me tell you about the area, meet my goldfish. Her name's Sarah, your room's here for the night. It's mine too, oh yes, that's right.

It's all right there in the small print that you checked. We're going to share a bed. I'm going to give you head, oh be my guest, be my guest, be my guest, and be and be the best, or no, here's the police, I'm arrested. There you go, the beauty and the beast inspired, the envy, which really still, it does get me right where it's pure. You're a big fan of your own stuff, aren't you?

Huge, yeah. Yeah. Well, I get really for all those live recordings, and I kind of listen to them, and I feel really quite euphoric. I'm like, these are great. Well, do us a favour, mate. Popus or review on iTunes, would you? These are right at my alley.

It kind of makes me think, I should listen to this podcast actually, I'd probably really enjoy it. Oh, you'd get a real smile out of it genuinely. It's a hell of a lot of fun, yeah. It's not bad, actually. But I will say this, little peep behind the jingle curtain. Anytime we try and do a musical theatre, any kind of take on musical theatre, it's often harder than doing a pop song.

Glocky? Yeah, 100%. I mean, like for me, the best is when we decide on a rock song. Oh, absolutely. Well, you can tell you are in your element on that black betty there, because that was quite easy for me. Getting a chance to reproduce. Yeah, just getting to, I I get to pick up the guitar, drum space, it's nice and easy. But

yeah, pop songs tricky, but musicals it's like, oh no. Can I, because we've never really talked about your your process before. So obviously back in the back in the good old days, you'd get together in the same room. What's the process? How do you sort of come up with the, do you better round a load of songs? Does Perry go, I've got this brilliant idea, just like I go, well I've learned how to play this.

How does it work? We've got around ideas and one of us comes up with the really good idea. And that's always 50-50. So whoever has the initial idea could easily be either Clark or I. Then Clarky goes away and works out how to make the song musically. I go away and try and write it literally and Clarky chips in when he has ideas for jokes and then we record and what used to happen is Clarky would lay down the music and then sit very patiently and try and guide

me through the vocals but nowadays he just sends me the music I have a bash at the lyrics on my own and then send them back to him. Is it true now that you record each individual note over the course of about a fortnight and Clark yesterday string them all together? He just builds it in post. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I just give him certain vowel sounds really. So this is your auto tuned, amazing. Yeah, I'm basically cassette boy the whole thing. I go back through old episodes and just put together. I actually died three years ago.

I know, is that gig? I got you an encore, I didn't I? I got you on call, I didn't I? This is again, this is another classic that I know as a fan favourite and it's the only one and it's tough that it's the only one but it's the only one that we've ever made a music video for and it's for that reason it's become a real favourite and it's iWikipedia Windows. iWikipedia Windows! iWikipedia Windows! iWikipedia Windows!

And it's what I found out! A double sash window is one you can move both up and down A trench of windows above a door you see around the town A case of a Windows god a ginger-rull swinging in out A stankass Windows god I did, what's that all about? A picture window will provide a non-impaired view A fixed window will not overwatch you, don't I do? A tilt and turn window, or fucking tilt and turn?

A French window is a door, bad fuckers, bad! I will compete with Windows! I will compete with Windows! I will compete with Windows! And this fall I found out! They Windows are a protrusion from the main world line. Thermal Windows semi-circles all the fucking time. All real Windows have many panels if you need proof. As Starlight is a window that is in the fucking roof!

I will compete with Windows! I will compete with Windows! I will compete with Windows! I will compete with Windows! I will compete with Windows! This is what I found out! Definitely lives within the Paris Wheelhouse vocal wise. And actually, when we were filming the video for that, I remember thinking, I think there's a career here for me in You know this kind of musical genre. Yeah, so I could I could be on the hard rock crash genre

Yeah, I think so because you know what as well? There's a lot of vocalists for whom it's it's big charisma and personality That's what's getting them by and I think that that is your vocal style, your charismatic, you've got bags of personality, that's, you know, you're not necessarily technically the best singer anyone's ever gonna hear. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what? This is how you do best, not for a clocky. This is how you do best, not for a clocky.

Okay. Yeah. But I think you've definitely got that. And actually, we had a great, because we went to the studios in Crystal Palace and recorded ourselves basically playing along to it. I was playing the drums, Clark, you were playing the guitar, Perry, you were on thrushy vocals and it did feel like, what do we do this all the time? Yeah, it was good, wasn't it?

Yeah. Have you played that to gamble? It feels like that gamble, like genuinely adopted I Wikipedia Rindes is one of his favorite songs. I will, I will play it to him. I'll send him an MP3 of it, and I'll report back on what he says. He could be our manager.

If we were to become a thrash metal trio, no one could help us navigate that world better, you know? Well, this is it, you know. He does that podcast on Spotify, lifers, right? If we could get on that, you know, a lot of metal fans listen to that podcast. If we could launch ourselves through that,

I think that's not a bad idea. He is the gatekeeper of the download festival. We all know that. Exactly, that's right. He's so metal that he stays in a hotel off site. That is the Van Morrison of the download festival. Halfway through Kiss' Headline set, he goes, yeah, I don't see any more of this walks out. Gets in a car. It's driven to his hotel where he sleeps in a human bed.

Yeah. And not like a bed made of human skin, like you'd imagine the people at Download festival do now. He's not like Ed Giend. As it turned off his lamp, there's also a hollowed out skull. Ed Giendball. Ed Giendball. Oh my god.

Oh, it's good stuff. So, let's hear another one. Clarky. Yes. Hello. Sorry, I've got my list on my phone. So, I've got for shrubs. Oh, what are you using? I lovely play on scrubs.

This is of course, people know the theme from the TV show scrubs. This is of course the theme from the TV show scrubs. This is parody of the theme of the TV show scrubs. Again, dude, it is all on that, all on that, all on that, all superman. That does like a deep reference that we missed out on doing when we did the record. Oh, this is TLC's nice grubs. I've got no idea how much do I give you? Do I give you some allowance? Do I pour a whole bunch of it? Do I give you just a few drops? Do I wet my shrub? A shrub will can't tie or is it a really small tree?

Or hangin' play whatever it's died? The fuck it I tried? What a culturally? Do I wet my shrub, a shrub will contine, or raise it a really small tree, or I can play whatever it's died, the fuck it I'm trying, what a cultural leap, Shroud,

oh, Shroud. Do you remember they did I, Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, You're gonna bring out a later date. I'm not saying next episode, but you think you will eventually do your own response song to no shrubs. Well, as the plants. I was gonna say, it's only, it depends. When is the time that we run out of topics for a flat slam enough to be someone's gonna get

the pigeon off the roof? That's actually not a bad topic. That is quite a good topic, isn't it? Yeah, I don't, I wouldn't consider that to be us scraping the roof. That's actually not a bad topic. That is quite a good topic, isn't it? Yeah, I don't, I wouldn't consider that to be us scraping the barrel. Oh, in fact, there's a pigeon in, there's a pigeon in the kitchen. What am I going to do? Someone's going to get that. Someone's going to get that pigeon outside. I love it. It's, people have been crying out for a catch the pigeon flat chest land down crossover episode and finally we can get dacidly and muckly on as

our as our two guests. I love this. I'm oh I'm gonna say I'm another one that I think I might even prefer this to the original. Great that's our goal. That's the dream isn't it? I'm not saying it's not saying it's replaced it as an earworm, but it's definitely, if someone said, would you like to hear shrubs, always like, hear no scrubs, I'd go shrubs every time. Do you remember when we saw Craig David at Glastonbury?

Oh, I remember that. How could I ever forget? It was a great moment. He was fantastic. One of those really nice. He was really amazing. He played a bunch of his own songs, obviously. Perry had a good old cry to Ryzenfall. And then he said, now I'm going to bring out the T.S.5, and he wheeled out a big desk,

and just played a little of other people's songs, and sang a little top of them. One of them was no scrubs. And it's not a bad idea sang a little top of them. And one of them was, one of them was no scrubs. And it's not a bad idea for a glass to be set when you think, what has he got? He's got five or six huge bangers. But then after that, why not play Jump Around by House of Pain? Yeah, just dropped a DJ set inside his own set.

Why not, man? There's a lot of fun. It's great. It's kind of what Cole played in on the Super Bowl half-time show. They did like, they kind of did a couple of songs and then they were like, yeah, he's Beyonce. I mean, like, you know, this is the good, here's the good stuff now. And then it's kind of what Beyonce do, formation, and they're like, wow, that was good,

wasn't it? It's the Super Bowl half time, you don't want to hear fix you. It's kind of like, you know, that's it. You must be so hard, because, you know know obviously it's like a mega successful band like Coldplay but you get up on stage and just think why don't we do more rock songs? Obviously they don't sell as well but you just when as soon as you get up in front of a crowd you be like oh man do you think that's a wrong case? That like radio head go, well yeah, sure.

We're one of the best regarded in most critically acclaimed bands of all time. But we're never gonna be asked to do the Super Bowl half time show. There's nothing on in rainbows. That's gonna get the crowd going. I'd love karma police, just better play it right now. That is the song that's playing in my head

when I watch all sports. So it'd be better if I... Oh. Right, what's our next jingle? It's you mate. Beautiful, I was asking myself. Oh, a recent banger. Recent banger, caffeine.

Absolutely love this. It just fell out, absolutely packed. And obviously country song really easy for Clarky to produce, to produce it up a tree. It fell out absolutely packed. You're not, that's what a cow says, isn't it? Is that, is that where the phrase comes from? I've never heard the expression it fell out. Absolutely, Pat.

I've got this down Pat. I've got it down Pat, yeah, I've heard that. But I've never heard it fell out, absolutely Pat. I've heard Ted Glenn say that in an episode of Postman Pat. When he's talking about a box falling off the back of his tractor that's very important, that's got to get across. Oh, no, it's when Greendale.

It's when Poe's from Pat asking how his moods have been. How you keeping during lockdown, Ted? Oh, I've had it down Pat. But now I'm back on the up with all this cow shit. My cow shit business goes from strength to strength Pat. I've started selling cow shit pets to the download festival. Let me tell you, I'm right back on the up. What about Frisbee?

Or, uh, or when Pat's like, oh no, I've reversed over GS. Oh no. Oh no. What about Frisbee? I'm not a reverse David GS. Oh no. No. No. What a bifurst me. Dead cat frisbee. Is that the name of a thrash rail band? Good thing.

Yeah, caffeine. Here we go. I've had way too much of you than I planned I shouldn't have gone for tiramisu and a liter of nitro cobrou when I ordered that breakfast can't eat And that was just my first mistake for lunch I ate a coffee cake and a pour over of quite a mallet bean My chickens all came home to roost when I put a look in a bar of boost and a can of coke with my neighbor Charlie Shee My eyeball shaking my feet they tap I stress on my teeny whizz my night cap I think I've got a problem with caffeine Caffe, caffeine, caffeine It's for him and I'm washing the car

Caffe, caffeine, caffeine, caffeine Kathy Kathy Kathy Kathy Kathy After Google loads of stuff about Johnny Ma Perfect. Yeah, country. I mean again, you know, a very strong back-in vocal from Clarky. With a surprise reference to Johnny Mar at the end. Which surprised me when I really sent it. There's a few, we haven't chosen this in our top 12, but you did a version of we didn't start the fire about burning stuff.

Yeah, that very nearly made my list. And there was a bit when, and I remember texting you, I was listening back to the episode, I hadn't heard it when it played in the episode, you know, when I was actually in the room doing the episode, but I was listening back to the episode, because I do listen to the podcast, and I do enjoy it. We should talk the listener through that very quickly.

I'll explain. I'm just listening to the jingle. In the live, like me, in Clarkie Slayover for a day or two. And then with the like, this is a good one, we're really happy with this, we say every time. There we go. Get into the live record and it starts to play. The guests feel very awkward

because they're in the room, something's playing. They're not really listening to it, they're shuffling around. The audience are kind of trying to listen. It basically, in the room, it always absolutely absolutely tanks and it finishes and people are like well that was a thing and but then we always have to be quite patient and wait for that moment where people are going to be listening to it in their ear canals at home. Exactly, so it sort of works best when you can't see the faces of the people

listening to it is what you're saying. That's what I'm saying. Yes, yes, very much so yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but I know. Sir, how we imagine people listening to it, they love it. Absolutely. This unseen listener, loving it. The lyric that surprised me the second time around in that song was, I took a phone call from Sean Penn and she's on toast again. Oh yes.

And I was like why Sean Penn suddenly calling you up in this song but uh never explained. Well it was kind of like a nod to the fact that we didn't start the fire kind of has lots of it has like a cast of quite random people in it. Yeah, but aren't they all sort of like big kind of awesome? Big no, no big significant kind of iconic apoc making individuals as opposed to an actor who was once married to Madonna and did a very convincing impression of a mentally disabled person. Oscar winning Sean Penn. Oscar winning Sean Penn. So activist. Famously humorous Sean Penn. I didn't say it was a funny phone call. LAUGHTER It's quite a butt the cheese on toes, right?

It was like, what's the point of finishing that off? The next one I chose was, this is a great one as well. And again, another good example of one that... Well, I tell you what, let's hear it. It's festival. It's the Oasis imagination or have I just had to pay A pause for a full-life form And I'm looking for a phone signal I must be at a musical festival

Music on a festival I had to wait for a lifetime To have a piss on to some slime I don't know the day of the time But when the sun comes up Some want stars playing bongos Someone starts playing bongos, some kind starts playing bongos Stop playing f-cking bongos Is it worth the aggravation? To try and watch a band when some twat puts his flag in the way? I've seen someone dressed like Gandalf and I haven't had a what tends to mine My pillows they back off wine

But all we need is the sunshine Then we take out top top And then we make it happen We're gonna make it happen Stop playing fucking bonkos We're gonna make it happen Shit's wrong This is gonna fucking fuck festival it's time Yeah Don't wanna get I mean, yeah! Come on, I can't! ["Rocco's Star Style"] One of my real highlights with Pappies

is getting to perform that live on stage at latitude. Yes. And with a band behind us and really feeling like, this is the goal. This is the goal to be, to be belting out, you know, rock and roll, star, style song, a bad a festival, a festival that I love just giving it both barrels, it felt absolutely brilliant, brilliant brilliant brilliant brilliant. We loved it, we loved it so much because obviously it was in the show then we did Latitude Festival. We performed it at least once at the Latitude

Festival, possibly even twice. And then we enjoyed it so much we decided to perform it at one of our shows at the Soho Theatre. A slightly more sedate affair. And Dremble, we opened the show with it and less success, I'd say. The festival atmosphere didn't quite arrive. Was that also the song? Was it that song where we hadn't, this, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, it, it would, it would, it would, it would, it would, When I was singing my line, I'd come to the front of the stage and you'd stand behind me like vamping Parry and read the next line off my back then I would come to the back of the stage and vamp behind you Reading the line of your back because we just didn't know any of the lyrics. Yeah, absolutely Pretty cool tactic. I'm not a bad tactic. Not a bad tactic. Wonder if there are any bands out there and that's what the genuine genuinely what what they do. I believe, I believe Charles and Eddie used to do it. That's, yeah, Charles would step forward seeing,

look into my eyes, can't you see it's open wide? Will I lie to you, baby, will I lie to you? And then Eddie would step forward and say, oh yeah. Having ready off the back of there. He just had a, oh yeah, that is done the back of his neck. And we were gonna do that tactic with you, Clarky, but we'd have had to report Crosby a step ladder.

Why does Crosby keep going and sitting in an unpartisan chair in between every line? Oh yeah! I tell you what, Crosby's mic technique is pretty good, but his periscope technique is all over the place. Okay, well, Clarkie, take us home to the place we belong, number 12. This isn't number 12. This is number 9 mate. Oh no.

Perry, you've skipped one of yours. I know which one you've skipped, though, so don't worry. We've gone, I've gone, we've gone. The Royal Way. Guys, guys, clock he's gone. He's done a fan morocin. He's just walked out. I mean, mentally, yes. About five years ago.

Um, yet. I see you can fool me as I'm putting up my tent. You must earn much more than me. You just rocked up on page some rent That's the problem we can't lose Losing the better than campus Mine's only a three-burs And it might not keep the rain out But once I've got it off, well, it's costing me now so I bet that your looks good on the campus side

But I'll watch as it cost a new burn I'm quite expensive, all very light I said I bet that your looks good on the campus side But if you need a poor kid up there You burn like a quaint, bent, shibbol, fairy lights A salamella, your looks good on the couch I'm with a few, need a blue key to fade up You're now waiting to recruit with lights You're now waiting to recruit with lights Yeah, it's a beauty

Again, right in our wheelhouse, that one A nice chance for Clarky to really noodle away as well To really give it a little bit of the old, a little bit of the old blisters on my fingers. Always good that, here Clarky gave for it. It's an absolute banger and no mistake and it's nice to match the lyrical dexterity of the Arctic monkeys. I feel like we did that. Fair enough. We stared down a Titan and we took him on. Yeah, absolutely.

We went toe to toe. And also, a message that I think we really believed in. It made me a clarkier kind of staunch. Yeah, they take your own Ted campus. Yeah. I think we poured a lot of that energy into the song itself. A lot of the scorn you reserve for people like myself who did glamping on the way.

The one time I went to Glastonbury I did glamping. I'm very, very good. Famously, my girlfriend glamps whilst I did. Yeah, she's done with myself and Charlie. Yeah, yeah. I stayed at the temperate Tom and his brother and stay. We're anti-glampers. And these glampers, yeah. How do you feel about the temper top of his brother and stay we're anti-glampers and Leaks, yeah, how do you feel about the people who don't even glam but walk off the site into a car to a hotel?

I mean those people They don't even marry this song do they? And Perry, do you want to hear your last choice? Dealer's choice, so no mistake Let me have a look what it was. It's Linky Ruth. Oh, yes, I saved my favourite to the last, I think. Well, you skipped your second choice, is what you...

The pleasure of this jingle was, I'm margin aband. That, we kind of like, I'm not sure a lot of people will understand the reference yet. And we've had quite a lot of people will understand the reference yet and we've had quite a lot of messages where people have said they've discovered the sleeve had mods through listening to our jingle. We've had a few of those messages, I really enjoy those messages because they were very, you know obviously they've been very distinctive from the get-go but their audience has grown over the years so it was very nice to get. We like to think it might have been one of the first pastiches of the sleep and multi there. Yeah, and now you can't move for them, can you?

Exactly, that's it. But also as well, this is another one that's like in the genre of, as opposed to taking a direct song of theirs, isn't it? Yes, yes. So, like, occasionally you won't do a song parody, you'll do kind of like a genre parody. And this is, which I think, you know, it's as good if not better than anything, let's leave him on to put out. Thank you, well, thank you very much.

Thank you very well. I'm always happy to play a couple of minutes June, I always happy to play a couple of minutes June. There's a crack in the room, so let's smoke some crack. I had a couple of minutes June, mate. Always happy to play a couple of minutes June. The old man is a fucking junkie Look at that hole in your roof bed like a Yorkie really junkie Having a party everybody single Drops on our heads as we're trying to mingle Fuck me anybody got some specials and catching water in an empty tuba Pringles. Trip trip trip I've got a leaky roof.

Drop drop drop it's the bleaky truth I put some pots on the ground, so let's smoke some pot Cameroon stops me benefits, so me roof starts it to rot It's dripping, it's like a shit shower, stand under there mate You'll be cleaning a fucking hour, it's not raining, caps and dogs It's raining, buses and bitches, it's raining buses and bitches It's tapping on the air until me left eye twitches Yeah, it's like Chinese water torture Sitting under a roof that blairs brisk and portrait

Watching Master Chef in a fucking monsoon Fuck this, I'm going somewhere dry Let's go to weather spoons Drip drip drip Got a leaky roof Drop drop drop It's the weather spooze, drip, drip, got a leaky roof, drop, drop, drop, it's the bleakie truth. There you go, a political song as well, it feels like it's got a staunch message to it. I loved it. Yeah.

Right, my final choice. Yes. Again, another band that we love. This is the Streets, a Streets parody. And again, we're back to the festival. This is about charging your phone. To the tent I went and my phone's not spent. Four bars heading back to the bar.

Sure, it's going to go far. But where's the bar at? Don't know, phone out, check the map on my app. Get the timer, sure it's gonna go far But where's the bar at? Don't know phone out check the map on my app get the timer Look at the lineup is using energy up put your phone away That's what they say sure and then it'll last all day But quick film that man wants to plan get it up there on Instagram boot boot someone set up a WhatsApp group festival legends 2019 woo woo Three bars that catch no way phone out, I'll pay with I pay.

Festival Heroes forever, another WhatsApp group, this one started by Trevor. Check the map on the app, two bars. Takes an age to get back to the stage. One bar and Trevor's off his face, face timing. He's confused and he's lost and he's flying. Stay wherever you are, drop a pin. As I start to begin, I realise, no bars, my phone, it's dying.

I thought I would have been on my phone, but now it's dying. You haven't got a chart, you have your name. Let me drop a phone in. Feel very comfortable parading the streets. Yeah. And that feels like something I could do in my sleep. Yeah. I mean, I love this. It's so, it really captures the essence of the original. I think that's the same with the Sleafhood Mods one.

You're really, you're really, you know what, as well, with the Arctic Monkeys one. You feel like you've inhabited the character of an Alexander of a Mike Skinner of that bloke from the sleep of mods. We're just leafered after after we put out that song, the streets brought out a new song, the one that they did with Taiman parlor. Yes, yes, yes, actually, I thought it had a very similar vibe. It had a lyric about them looking for a charger, didn't it? I actually think ours is better. Yeah, I actually think our strings Paradise better than well because your street parody is is

parodying a song of original pirate material not streets in 2020 Yes, and I did like the streets in 2020, but I just thought the approach to phones and chargers was handled a bit more successfully Aaron. Right. What's your number 12 clock? Well, my last one, it's stuck up on me because I was listening through to old Jingles. And it wasn't in my mind's eye.

I didn't think I'd go for it, but when I listened to it, it really tickled me, so it's a hot tub. I was staying in a pad of a friend's one night and I fancy the bath, and they said alright, so I jumped into the tub and began to unwind, but what happened next came to my mind? Wrong to my asshole with tremendous force, some bubbling crumbles began to sprout forth. You didn't tell me you had a hot tub I cried, and how it got a hot tub they replied. It was just a normal bath! I produced biogas! And I started to frown! It was a very next moment for water to grow! Yep, yep.

Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, lovely, lovely, lovely, strong stuff there. Firstly, we always enjoy a monster mash parody. Yeah, we find the monster mash. The funniest song of the world. The phrase I was working my lab late one night, never fails to make me laugh. It could be, or just I was working my blank late one night,

any reference that references the monster mash, I'm 100% on board. It's rude as well, and it's also got, I think, oh God, see if I can kind of put this into words. A thing that you do very well, Tom, is you say something with kind of equal parts pride and shame. And that final line, where you're basically talking about shit, you're self in the bar. There's a real glee to it, but also an inherent sadness. And I think that is... Oh, that's again.

Oh, that's again. You know, please tell I've done it again. I don't know if we tell that on the podcast, but I've done it again. It's really funny. Do you remember I've done it again, Perry? No, no, no. Okay, so... Oh, do you not remember what I've done it again, this is really funny. Do you remember I've done it again, Perry? No, no, no. Okay, so.

Oh, do you not remember what I've done it again is? Oh, God! Right, we were doing a show at, it was for our different math brown of outside the box. And it was one of his theater gigs, it was a slightly bigger, one of his little venues, it was a theater gig. And we were doing either a preview or an extended set. And one of the sketches we were doing was a job interview where Clarky was going

for a job. I was interviewing him and Tom was playing like a sort of imagination figure who would hop on a pogo stick behind him wearing like a big pink dressing gown and a big long sort of like drainage pipe hose nose and it was basically a sort of crazy figure and then at the end of it the punchline was it turns out that wasn't Clarke's imagination that was my secretary right that was the kind of the punchline sketch and what would happen is Perry would be so excited about having done most of the sketch he'd Van Morrison it and backstage would take all of the sketch. He'd fan Morrison it, and backstage would take all of the costume and get ready for the next sketch, forgetting

that he had to come on at the end and be the punchline of the sketch. And I remember, one time, I said, I'm thinking your name was Margaret, it was like, Margaret, would you bring in the next candidate please? And I just heard from behind the screen, behind the back stage, I've done it again. Because I knew there was gonna be a nice big long pause where I had to get all of his costume back on and hop on a pogos stick and pogos stick out while I was just still on stage with nothing else to say. So I had to, and again, if you're playing quite a sort of

stern man, who's stern, stoic man who's doing a job interview, you can't really kind of riff. You can say Margaret, I'm waiting, where are you Margaret? You know, as much as you could do. And then eventually, Harry, with the dresser gown half hanging off, and probably another costume on underneath. And like, you know, the drain pipe just sticking out of his ear,

just he pogosticked on to total silence and pogosticked back off. And we had to rebuild the gig after that. But then that became a, that's where the, That's where the that's where the I've done it Again, that's what the hell came from I've done it again. It's up there that's up there with Do a thing to you here because also we're not performing in like you know We're not performing in gorgeous theaters where there's like a proper sort of dressing room green Well, you can go on all resting. You're just stupid behind a flat at the back of the stage

Do you remember the show in God, where was it? It was in the Midlands. And during the final scene of last show ever, you could just hear me drinking really loudly. Ah! Ah! Yeah! Ah!

I didn't realize quite how loud I was being. And so, and I was really, I've just finished a show. I had like a sort of 2L bottle of water backstage and I was basically just cheating a 2L bottle of water. So it's probably just a, oh, just coming from backstage. That was audible enough that you could hear it, which probably meant at least the front row could also hear it.

I'm so sorry. Such a loud drink. I'm a loud drinker, man. could also hear it. I'm so sorry. Such a loud drink. I'm a loud drinker man. Got a very, very loud drinking voice. So, projected drinking. That takes us, that's the end. That is the end.

Oh boy. Well obviously we'll stick all the trimmings. We'll stick all the trimmings on at the end folks. And dude, you know, if you're still feeling, I know it's a little bit after the fact, but if you're still feeling in the festive mood, then that episode of Bangers in Mash is a real festive treat. I haven't gone back to it for a few years and I'm sure it, you know, I'm sure we stay stuffing it that you

wouldn't say in 2020, but it was a different time. It was a different time. So when is this going out? When is this going out? I think it's going on the 29th. Oh, the dreamings. Okay. Well, happy festive season, happy new year. Exactly. Happy new year, everybody. Thanks once again for being with us this year. Yeah. We face 2021 with...

Well, we face it together. Yes, exactly. We're not going to say what we face it with. All we're going to say is we're holding your hand and we're in your ear canal. Which is hard to do. Very dumb, we're going to call for both of us. This episode was produced as they all have been this year by producer Emma Corsham. Corsham to Corsham team! Cheers everyone! Bye!

Hello Ed Gamble here, Metal Efficient Ardow, follower of the Dark Lord. I've just listened to I Wicked Paidid Windows, the hot new metal track. That's how it was presented to me as a metal song I have to react to. I'd actually argue the genre classification of I Wicked P'ded Windows. It's actually a lot closer to hardcore punk. We're talking 80s New York based hardcore punk

I am over in my opinion Sort of similar it really put me in mind of the early Beastie boys hardcore records Go and check out this a compilation called I think it's called same old bullshit or some old bullshit. I think it's same old bullshit There's a song called BC Boys in another song called Egg Raid on Mojo. Sort of put me in mind of that sick of it all, early sick of it all, bands like that. There's sort of aggressive vocals but you can hear what's being put across. It's a strong, simple message. I work a period of windows.

I learnt a lot about windows from it. Just a side note, nothing to do with the music, but I feel like if it was a metal song, I wouldn't have necessarily heard all of the Windows facts. So I think it was to its credit that it followed more of a hardcore punk style. The guitars, quite low in the mix, too low in the mix to be a good metal song and probably a little simplistic, which is why it put me more in mind of the sort of DIY genres. But I did enjoy it, that's not certain, enjoy it, I enjoyed the aggression of it, I enjoyed the facts. Probably not, you're not going to be playing download anytime soon. I sort of see puppies as more of a slam dunk festival. There's a sort of punk festival that's held.

There's one in the leads, one in Hatfield. You'd probably play the Hatfield one on one of the smaller stages. Maybe you'd sneak onto damnation fest in the leads, but that tends to be more sort of technical based death metal. Maybe Arctangent in Bristol, opening the third stage. But I did enjoy it. I did enjoy it.

And, you know, I've learned a lot about windows. I don't feel like that's the point you wanted me to make, but I've made it, there we are. Yeah! Bye! The Nissan shines brightly on the N40 Like so much festive tinsel around the Christmas tree I'm driving home to see her of Paxomissal Toe I've loved it for a year now, I've gotta let her know

I met this girl as Christmas didn't give her my heart But we shared a line of naughty salt, so that's not a bad start All the trimmings, gonna let her know all the trimmings So let it snow all the trimmings So let it snow all the trimmings By the Christmas tree Cause I am Santa Claus and she is my mummy But just outside of Gaden The niss and gave a pop

The car began to show Duranny came right to a stop The M40 was dark, the car began to shudder and it came right to a stop. The M40 was dark and the evening grew much colder as I stood there slowly crying. Onto its hard shoulder but from the nearest field, a horse began to nay. It galloped over, cleared his throat and then began to say, All the trimmings, walk it you back tonight, all the trimmings. You could ride me, it's alright, all the trimmings, I'll get you back tonight All the trimmings, you can ride me, it's alright All the trimmings, you can't have Christmas on your own I'm a Christmas horse and I'm going to take you home So I ate a mince pie and then I had the Christmas Kip

It turned out it was July and I was him in spy and then I had a Christmas gift. It turned out it was July and I was dead in a skip. There was a present wrapped in a festive box, just a lot of broken glass and half of a dead fox. There was no girl that was just me some chang of mine, my Kevin. So come on Christmas horse, let's ride all the way to heaven, all the trimmies. No candy came for me, all the trimmies. No candy came for me all the trimmies. No candy isn't free all the trimmies. I've paid the highest price. I hope God likes the party

and he's got some chalky spice all the trimmies. Oh, Merry Christmas! Oh, Merry Christmas! Oh! Would you please be upstanding? For the Patreon, neighborhood watch, roll call, and I really mean that guys I really mean that, sir. There's going to be a fog coming in from left to right but nobody cares because in that fog doing a piss is something. There is going to be a light breeze coming in from the east and notice Ben it's going

to be there. There's going to be an absolute, there's going to be an absolute fog coming in from the north but don't worry it's gonna be, it's gonna be on fleek and who of course is gonna be there? Abbey glee. Abbey glee. Strong. Strong breeze coming in from the west. Lots of wind. So don't try to whee. Someone didn't take that advice. It's my mochi. Let me tell you now guys there's going to be a very very strong

Easily wind coming in from the north Not sure how they're managing that but that's what I've been told. Please don't try to fuck it like Like windfucker themselves madhucket There's going to be a very weak rain coming up from the south. Don't worry about it. Don't get too fussy, particularly you, no-albussy. Thunderbolts are lightning, very, very frightening.

Wait, it's Meg Melvin Darn. LAUGHTER Sunshine on a rainy day makes my soul trip, trip, trip away. Not my words, the words of a cock-a-spaniel owned by Charlie Daniels. Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. Said David Sackery. LAUGHTER I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes. Snow, let it snow. Said David Sackery. Yeah! I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes. What am I feeling? The bullshit of Math Berum and everyone!

Yeah! Ha! Ha! Ha! Why does it always rain on me? Is it because my name is Wendy, Jane Herbert? Oh, it was all yellow. Of course it was. Because I was talking about Herb Green 1970 War.

What would you do if I sang out of tune? Would you stand up and walk out on Kenfrew? Lady Madonna, children at her feet, wonder how they manage to meet Steph Barros. That concludes today's new withdrawal. We'd like to apologize to everybody. Sometimes it hits other times it flops and you've just heard one of the

flops. Apologies, apologies to Steph Baros and all of their jumps.