Pappy's Flatshare - Slamdown w/ Ben Partridge and Fern Brady (clear out the gutter) S9E6

Episode Date: May 6, 2019

Neither “Tom!” nor “Ben!” want to clear out the gutter so Matthew says we’re gonna have to have a Flatshare Slamdown!Former reviewer turned reviewee, comedian Fern Brady, and Beef and Dairy podcaster, Benjamin Partridge join Pappy's to fight it out.Features: awkward questions, wheels that aren't wheels and the stolen kombucha bottles and legendary bearskinFern Brady - https://twitter.com/FernBradyBenjamin Partridge - https://twitter.com/benpartridgePappy’s - https://twitter.com/pappystweetSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatsharePappy’s Flatshare Slamdown features Matthew Crosby, Ben Clark and Tom Parry with special guests Fern Brady and Benjamin Partridge. It was devised by Pappy’s with producer Ben Walker. Big thanks to everyone who came down to see the recording, to Emma Corsham for helping out and to The Pleasance for having us.Pappy’s Flatshare Slamdown is a Fuzz Production for Acast and the internet Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, we are Papis. Hey! Hi! Hello, Papis. Hello, Papis. And hello to you, the listener. Listen, dear, here we are. Yes, we are.

And we've already said, but we're Papis. It's all clear now as to where we are and who we are. But what are you listening to here? Well, it is a brand new episode of Papis Flat Share Slam Down recorded live at the Pleasant with two amazing guests in Fern Brady and Ben Partridge of the Beef and Dairy Network podcast. Oh, this was a real treat. It was so much fun. It's just a fun episode. Enjoy it. I'm sure you will. Other things to say are if you haven't already, please donate to the Patreon to

get some extra bonus footage from this episode and more. Yeah, and we're working on things like the T-shirts and stuff. Oh my god, we've got the first designs in for the T-shirts. Oh, they look so good. They're looking really, really good. They look so good. We're trying to find a time, this is how mad it's got.

We don't find time to get drunk. We're going to do a drunk episode. Oh yes. And we've got to get, look in our diaries and go, we're going to walk all through if I get drunk together. Just, just, just, but just wrong, because we are going to get looking our diaries and go we're all three of us get drunk together just wrong because we are going to do it drunk all the time. Oh yeah, the population of our constantly he's been doing the leg work he's got method so enjoy this episode and we will see you on the other side. I'm glad you made that noise Tom because otherwise otherwise that would have been a perfect recording Tom

Well firstly lovely text mechs flourish there Then we've got two problems this week one is take down down the pinata. Ah, no way, bandit all! The other one is clear out the gutter. Well, it's not going to be me. I'm not going to go near that gutter. Do you know why? Why Tom? Well...

I only... We're in for a tale. Only a couple of weeks ago. You know those 3D graffiti artists who draw holes on the floor and it's like, I'm going to fall in. Oh yes. One of those came by the house and they drew on the side of the house right at the top

of the wall a fake drain pipe. But here's the thing, instead of using chalk, he was using margarine. And it looked so realistic and I came out and I looked at it and I said, I can't believe that's not a drain pipe. LAUGHTER Strong. Ben's strong. Ben mate, why are you refusing? Well, actually, I can't even think about gutters when I get really hot under the collar.

I just instantly just really get me going. Like cleaning it. Oh, I just can't get my mind out of the gutter. Not strong. You could have backed in there, Tom. If the audience aren't going to do it, we're going to stick up for ourselves here. Well, there's only one way to settle this.

We're going to have to have a... Flash! No! Flash! Flash! Flash! Flash! I'll sell the same. Well, there's only one way to settle this. We're going to have to have a... Flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, Do I tell you I need you every single day of my life? Got to get you into my life! I'm the host of Landlord Matthew Crosby, and while they're under my roof that be following my rules, let's say hello to the tenants Tom Perry and Ben Clark. Oh, yes. Hello.

Now, hi, hi, hi. Hello, guys. I'm going to run something past you because Ben Walker, our producer, when we were thinking of an opening song together, he suggested it's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me, and I'm cleaning gutter. Yeah, instead of feeling good, it's been Walker's last show with us, I'm afraid it's Ben's last show, producer Ben. Not sure, anyway, listen, I'm the host and landlord, welcome to the show, but obviously you can. Not sure, anyway, listen, I'm the host and landlord. Welcome to the show, but obviously you can't clean the gutters on your own.

Who have you brought with you to be your gutter at this week, Tom? Well, Matthew, terrible news. The Jamboree is in danger. No. Yes. We've lost our musical accompaniments. Musical? Yeah, they play tunes. Oh, yeah, okay playing the surf scones. That does sound like music.

The jump isn't trouble for a lot of reasons. One of the big reasons is I choose... Don't want a jump or ears. Chunes and scons is cancelled and that's a problem. Yes, but don't worry, in order to say the day, I've hired Scotland's premier pianist and comedian extraordinaire. It's Fern Brady!

Fern Brady is here! APPLAUSE What? Fern, thanks for coming on the show. Thanks, I wouldn't be known for playing piano. That's basically a little fact that she told Tom before the show. I mean, there's not what we brought you on the show to do. No. We haven't got a piano. I mean, we have.

Well, that one's pretend. There's a fake piano behind us on the set. Can we edit in now, just some really great piano part? Can we edit in Scott Joplin's The Entertainer? I tell you what, Fern, while I'm chatting to you, why don't you play us a little bit of piano? We whack that underneath it. Brilliant. No one's going to need any difference.

I'm not kidding. It that underneath it. Brilliant. No one's going to not eat any difference. Okay, so so fun. Play us a little bit of piano. Oh my god, that's out of this world. That's brought it here to my eye. Now, if you don't mind chatting while you play. This is one of my favourite pieces. It's a gorgeous piece. Now listen, listen Fern. Listen Fern, what kind of a flatmate are you? I mean obviously a very musical one, that's first and foremost. Terrible flatmate, terrible. How's that? Well my flatmate now is my boyfriend and he often says I'm a good girlfriend but I'm really bad for my steel stuff.

How does that make you a good girlfriend? Surely that's stealing stuff. All that mate feels tough for him. Oh, that's the other thing. We had rats in the garden and I'll put food out for them. No, no. So he got annoyed at that. a'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r

gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r We were like, oh shit, what are we gonna do? So I just got some self-reasoned flour and put it in the bag. And my mate was like, that's not gonna work. I was like, it'll totally work.

It doesn't. Like he... He cocked it pretty immediately. Yeah, he knew it was flour. I don't feel very pepped up and weird, I've got a cake in my nose. Well, please don't nick any of our speed tonight, because it's big bag of speed. Is it all that's getting me through the show?

Let me tell you now. Can we put in a sound effect of a big bag of speed? LAUGHTER We're just a car going past. I suppose we're both of those things. You can still use the phase I'm coming up when you take it. Right? It's self-raising for us.

Oh! Oh! Oh! Yes! That's... Yeah, I've got that. I've said that. Very much. It wasn't a laugh.

It was just a, oh, it does work. Yeah. It does work what he said. Next on Radio 4. And so, thank you very much, for coming on the show. Ben, who have you brought? I have brought my brother.

It's Ben Patrick. It's Ben Patrick. That's how? I have bought my brother. It's Ben Partridge. It's Ben Partridge. That's how names work. That's how names work, right? Ben Partridge. Thank you for coming on the show. My pleasure. Obviously, you're a huge fan of the drug speed.

Absolutely. Always off your tits on it. Yeah. I assume you want me to play this. Chuba? LAUGHTER Now, he's filled a chubo with speed. I assume you want me to play this Chuba Now he's filled a Chuba with speed It's a real novelty act

Yeah, that's a speed playing music from the film If this Chuba goes below 50 Well, we're both going to blow So what kind of a flatmate are you I'm Woodley I'm a good flatmate. Okay, so in the communal areas. I'm very much keeping it together the rats love you absolutely Come into my bedroom and it's like an MC Escher painting But done by a mad child Just fucking you know horrible

Just fucking, you know, horrible. Just fucking. Just fucking fucking. The last days of Roman there. What brass instruments filled with different drugs? I feel like. Tarenette filled with heroin. Cornet filled with the other drugs you can get. LAUGHTER Are you messy or are you dirty? What's the difference?

Well, I'm messy because there's lots of dirt around. You can be messy. You take the clothes out of the washing machine, you take them on the radiator, then they're just sort of there. You don't ever tidy it up like. No, I'm not dirty. I'm more messy. The reason I asked about Messi and dirty years ago, Tom went around my house to pick up some stuff that I had come over. I was like, she was pretty much a big bag of speed.

But it was like, yeah, to go around the flat. And he went, oh, why don't you go into your room, Crosby? Your room's absolutely filthy. I went, no, I said, Messi, it's not filthy. You've got a box of rotting carrots under your bed. Yeah. And I was like, why have I got a box of rotting carrots? He's like, oh, yeah, I I put Monday bed about a fortnight ago

There were props for a show. I didn't know where else the putters were just left to Monday a bed And I was getting really bad asthma attacks. Oh, yeah, yeah Yeah, I was getting really bad ass because I was breathing all the spores off the carrots. Carried spores good eyesight though Rice like really improved This is one of the dirtiest things I've ever seen was our stage talk about This is one of the dirtiest things I've ever seen. Was I staying at the cat? Let's talk about it. There you go.

I stayed at someone's flat where I went into their bathroom and they had a toilet seat for their cat where they were training their cat to use the toilet like a human. I've seen that, yeah, you put a liturator on top of the toilet seat and then gradually make the whole bigger and bigger until the cat uses your toilet. And it uses your toilet.

It's a bit weird. Well, I don't know if it's tiny because the cats' shits are going in there, but it was horrifying. The hardest bit is then training the cat to use the flush. That's a weird. Would you get it for Cosmo? Would I get it for Cosmo?

I mean, the only way I can think that you'd get the cat to use the flush is if you sort of smeared cat food on the actual flusher. So it was sort of leapt up to eat the cat food and then depressed the fl- No one's going to go into your bathroom and think- No one is food on the floor, I'm just going to assume. I mean, let's face it's better if you have a litter tray, isn't it, than rubbing cat food over your toilet? Yeah, yeah.

What, we solved one problem. If they were litter trays for humans, would you use what? No. Yeah, yeah. What, we've solved one problem. If they were lit at trades for humans, would you use one? No. No. Okay. Just asking. Do not go on dragons' den with that idea. And don't go near a long jump pit.

My bedroom is giving me asthma though. So that will be the carousel. Yeah, you want to check under your bed. Go to the doctor. What's up, doc? Um. I'm not sorry. How often do you hoover?

Oh, never, of course, never. You fucking idiot. I always tell you as well, you actually, you had it unwanted flatmate, didn't you? Because a fox came into your flat and pissed over everything. Yeah. And you've never hoovered, even the foxes pissed over all your stuff.

I didn't come in my bedroom. But have you hoved the areas with a foxes? I carried it over the threshold. I went, no, I cleaned because it down says there's no carpet, so I cleaned with like, um, fucking, you know, wet wipes. Wet wipes. Like bleach and stuff. Well, they've got him, they're got him playing pregnant with that sort of stuff.

I was gonna hoove my car about three years ago and I was like, who the car? Yeah, I was like, who the car my car? My car's finally, I've never hoved my car. I brought the hoover outside. Unbeknownst to me, he sat it down in a pile of fox shit. I opened my car and then just merrily just rubbed fuck shit all over my car.

That's a sell my fucking car. It's not the worst day ever. You can't sell a car that stinks of fuck shit, though. Well, you can. Turns out you're just selling me that car, by the way. So we have that rocket destined, but it's time for you to get their minds into the gutter, as we play Round 1!

It's been really rain and baby It's been holding back water for so long You should feel like a feel, baby. Come on. Oh, oh, oh, that gutters gone. Oh, oh, that gutters gone. You should have blocked it should That cut is gone, oh

I get a brush that's long, oh I'm cleaning I am a sensitive neighbor with two ships to give That's the passive aggressive baby And can you see what I see Shoulder dead squirrels and some humbly's baby There's something wrong with my front wall. You know it, you know it, because when you start a shower baby, oh, the water starts to fall and it tumbles, it's humbles, let's get it on.

Whoa! Because that gutter's gone. You know it, baby. Oh, that gutter's gone. Yeah, it cleaned through the, then we can get it on. Cause the goddess goes Oh, wow, wow, wow, wow Oh, wow

It's something else For just ask, does this song play every week? It's gonna Actually, speaking of questions, we've got a letter in from Sharon in Middletex. I thought we're reading out now. She says, big final of the show, I always donate. And she does Tom use auto tune on his vocals. And the answer is yes he does.

LAUGHTER Round one is called gutter reaction. The rules are very simple. I'm going to give each contestant a category and they have three seconds to give me called gutter reaction. The rules are very simple. I'm going to give each contestant a category and they have three seconds to give me their gutter reactions and name three things that fit into that category. I'm going to work my way through the contestants, one by one, but enough about my plans for vengeance.

Tom, you're going to go first. Three seconds. Three seconds. Three seconds. Three seconds. Three arms. Good job. We're just on a massive bag of speed, isn't it? This is going to be easy. This show is sponsored by a massive bag of speed. LAUGHTER Your category is... Oh.

Types of wheel. Oh, a tire. Tractor. Car. Bike. Correct. Carbike. I mean, you managed to get four in there. If I don't... I'm going to count car rather than car bike. I mean you managed to get four in there if I don't, I'm gonna count car rather than car bike. The tire might be debated. I mean I'm gonna accept it. The tire is a type of wheel.

No. Okay, this is how we play. You've heard from Good Cop, Crosseys. Partridge rears hisases Agley heads. LAUGHTER A tire is not a wheel. Put a tire on a wheel. Correct. It's why I went to the extra place.

LAUGHTER The upside down. LAUGHTER So, okay. That's so much speed I've done, baby. You still did four in 2.8, so it's fine. So, but I'm going to give give for a correct challenge. One point to Ben Patrick there, but not to his team. You've got three seconds to give me three things,

three words to begin with Q, go. Question, quince, quick. Oh, I'm afraid that's 3.5 look braids natural rhythm isn't fast. Is it you know? Oh, no I didn't even know what we were playing Because I was there another man but of puppies That's not can I just say I didn't know we're on fucking Stuart Goldbeth podcast now Yes, there was he left in in 2009. That was 10 years ago. We've moved on. You need to fern. Love you, Brendan. Not enough to work with you. We love you. Never. Thank you, fern LAUGHTER Lovely. Move it swiftly on. Can't believe that's what distracted you.

Wait a minute. Where's the fourth gun? It's been a decade, mate. Come on. LAUGHTER Ben, Ben Partridge. Matthew, please. Yes. Are you giving Fern no points or two points or...? Oh, good question. For all times, say. For Fern, who just brought up Fernand Dodds. Shall we say no points? No, no. Oh good good question for all times say for fern who just brought up her Brendan Dodgs

Should we say no points? I'm afraid you have to you get three points if you get it, but if you don't you don't get any points at all If you lose you get nothing Some of you write a song about that Okay, here we go Fern review doesn't 2009 Okay, let's talk about it Who was it? Broadway baby?

It was Fest and I gave you five stars. Oh, you were good guys. Oh, that's good. Five stars. Love that brandy guy. They should use more of him. So you have used for Fest? Yeah, there was two people I gave bad reviews to. Come on, name them who?

Yeah, come on, Bernie. But I've since gigs with them and it was... I think I've got better. But in fairness, I'm doing better than them now, so... Oh, wow. Is that fairness? Well, I've just seen maybe young me at a point. Celuitly.

Work harder. OK, Ben Patrick. Yes. Three seconds to give me three things you find in a school. Teacher, a pupil, a Patrick. Yes. Three seconds to give me three things you find in a school. Teacher, a pupil, a hoop. Yes. But the big question, the big question is a hoop a wheel. What type of hoop?

What type of hoop? I went to Hula School. Yes. I'm going to give you three points, Clarkie. Yes, mate. Three seconds to give us three numbers you can divide by three. That's your times. I'm gonna go with 369.

To be fair we were only taught Hula at the school. They didn't do maths. You got to think in Hula's. Okay, Tom. Oh my god. You have three seconds now. Yes. Give me three things. Smaller than a brick.

Go. A lamb's leg. At all. I had to time I'm afraid. A lamb's leg. I'm afraid. I'm afraid. I'm afraid time I'm afraid. A lamb's leg. I'm afraid. But only enough also can be found in a school.

Yes. A lamb's leg is not strong, mate. The friend is really broke, it's really. You spilt your drink. Why would it happen to have a firm? Furn. I would like from you. Three bad smells go. What happened to a pet?

The only bad smell right now is you sticking out this gig for. Basically, we just sort of fell out professionally. That's a bad smell. Eggs a bad smell, Fern. Can I ask you a question? Because you were so lovely at the start of the show. Are you on Brendan's payroll? This feels like classic Dodds.

He's set you up for this. OK. Ben Partridge. Yep. This feels like classic Dodds. He set you up for this. Okay Ben Partridge Three Things you pick go Peppers strawberries and a DVD. Oh I'm just gonna allow it. I'm just gonna allow it pick a DVD off the shelf Perhaps in a spa. OK. Perhaps when these two perhaps.

Yeah, all right. Clarke. So that was in my head anyway. Clarke, you've got three seconds. OK. Please. I think the spa is in the shop rather than like where you go get a massage.

Yeah. I know you're like, get a DVD of that massage. I'll just take it. Clarke, three seconds to give me... My lights. I can have a keering, as well. I'll be OK. Actually, when you left the day, you were... You were running the spa merch.

I'll have a mouse mat, and I'll have it printed on the t-shirt. Look at my face. Clarke, you have three seconds to give me three massive animals go an elephant a rhinoceros a giraffe correct lovely stuff I'm gonna take some things away here, okay, so I'm gonna give you the category and tell you a thing You can't use in that category Tom yes I would like three things you'd find in the sea not fish go a seahorse some coral and salt Can I hear the last one salt salt Would you find it in the sea? Yes, you'd have to work quite hard also is a sea horse of fish

No Partridge is not a horse you'll tie off your whole is a tire of wheeled geek. Right? Right? Right, right. You know what? I'm going to allow it because I don't like parties attitude. Speaking of luck like in attitudes. Fern!

Three things you hold in your hand, not a phone. Go. A penlet, a hamster. I don't know. Well, that makes seconds. So I can't give you the points. Oh, I like the fact you looked to your hand. You were holding a penlet. You could have done penlet and pen. Yeah, classic critic.

She was just thinking, Brendan's career. LAUGHTER How is this going to edit? Ben Partridge. Ben Partridge. Can we please have three vegan foods not tofu go. Vegan burger, vegan steak, vegan sausage. Oh yes! He's gained us! Clarky. Yes. Three things. A red, not blood, go. A tablecloth, a mic cable. OK, I'm blood. So I'm afraid. I just said what I saw.

I'm afraid you're just killed a guy. We have got a red tablecloth, you have got a red mic cable. You've also got some red electrical tape on your mic. You didn't spot that yet, say blood. At final one, two things you can't say. Tom, scary things, not spiders, not heights, go. Life, commitment, drop, dropping things. Yes.

Life, commitment. So Tom's getting married, speaking of dropping things. Did Tom's just about to get dropped himself. Yeah. Time's getting married this year. Hi, Jane. And commitment. How are you?

True. Fern. I would like you to give me three sports, not football or competitive eating. Go. Tennis, squash, volleyball. You did it! Yes! Boom! Ben Partridge, three types of booze, not fosters, not shardonnay. Go.

Peroni, Biorim Moretti and Limoncello. Very Italian. Very... Someone's on holiday. Finally, Clarky. Yeah. Three rock songs. No, don't stop believing. Or right now. Go. Err... err... err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, err, Oh He did it So so Tom and Fernor currently in the gutter whilst Ben and Ben are looking up at the stars

But all those roles reverse by the end of the show. Let's find out as you play round two. It's flat games Let's wait forever roll the dice spin that thing put that down Choose your gold, game! If you lose, you get nothing, games! If you win, you get gold, gold, gold, gold, gold, gold. Listen to that, everyone! Now, just imagine, a roll of toilet roll, where gold is printed on every sheet. And as you roll the icon for the loo, you just read gold.

Gold, gold, flat slab merch coming to you soon. I think we now have to register shitye merch.com. Don't wait. Yes. Okay. So this is flat games. Now, computer games, we all grew up playing them. I for one got so good at leisure suit Larry. I could pretty much play it with one hand.

LAUGHTER Oh! That's a deep cut, isn't it? There it is. A leisure suit Larry joke in 2019. Not afraid to do it, guys. Really half of the list was all get that, but the ones that they will really draw.

Oh. Now, I appreciate it. So this episode's flat games is our version of Super Mario, which we're calling Super Mario Key. Yes, pretty strong. I'm going to ask our players to sing about a computer game along to the music from another computer game. Oh, yes, please. Yes, please. This is pure flat slam right now. We're deep into flat slam territory here. A no mistake.

The best place to be deep in the flat slam territory is an episode of Flat Slam. Yes. We're in the right place. We're in the right place for it. Oh, it feels good. It feels great. Now, their teammate must guess the game they're singing about

and I'm going to give points for correct answers as well as tuneful singing, spot on descriptions and game, recognizing game.. So, are you a gamer for? No, but a lot of gamer guys seem to like my comedy, I don't know why. I don't know why. I played when I was little, I played Street Fighter 2 and Lion King Sega Megadrive. Well, I'll tell you what, why don't we... Let's not list too many games, just in case they pop up in the game itself,

I guess. Yes, I'm going to be furious if I have to think about the Lion King. Tom, anyway, Tom, you're up first. Here's your game for Furn to guess. Now, I'd like you to tell us all about this game to the tune of Super Mario. Would you like a little listen to remind you of how it goes?

Which Super Mario tune is the question? Well, it's this one, actually. It's this one. BELLS BELLS BELLS BELLS BELLS

BELLS BELLS BELLS BELLS OK, that's enough of that. They sing that a football matches. Good to hear it again. BELLS

BELLS BELLS BELLS Up the wall! They're just saying that a football match is good to hear it again. Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, Well, you run round with some kind of taller, Scopic thing on your head, And you talk to your team, Made for you are shooting other people really dead. You're normally in a desert, You're talking and you're into your headset, You're shooting bullets all the time, Bullets and violence all the time,

Because you live in the army, So you will cause some army to the cadastan to see all around the place do you see it you the advanced certain call that arrived in your head and you decided it was good to go and kill other people dead Paul Depp. OK, you've said the title. What? But I'll still be really impressed if I can get it. Have you got any idea what Tom was singing about? I think I know the game he means, but I could only guess at the name.

OK, go for it. Gun Wars. Yeah, it's not a bad guess. Because I think that is not a bad guess. It's not gun Wars, but it's a good guess. It should be called gun Wars. It's not gun wars, but it's a good guess. It should be called gun wars. It's basically gun wars. I'd buy a gun.

I'd buy a few game for gun wars. I'm gonna give you a point for gun wars, just because I like the idea of a game being called gun wars. Clarke, can you steal? Call of duty. It is call of duty. That's the one I meant. That's the one you meant. OK.

Can't give it points. I said Call of Duty in my song. So I'm going to give, of course, so I'm going to give one point to Furn for an incorrect answer. And I'm going to give out of a possible five, Tom, for the beautiful singing, a hot three. Hot three. There is a three out of five.

It's a Furn Brady review dream. Yeah. So Ben Part There is a free out of five. It's a Furn Brady review dream. LAUGHTER So, Ben Partridge is your turn now, and I would like you to sing about this game for Clarky to the tune of Angry Birds. Do you remember Angry Birds? Whoa!

Classic tune. Angry Birds. It's a hell of a sing along. Let's have a little listen to it just now. So, you did send this to me, Liz, so you're going to have to sing this. And I just listened to it, and I don't know what the opposite of an earworm is, but it's that I need a bird An aimless magpie Um, okay, okay, do you want to hear a little bit now? I'll just launch into it You're a little tiny just the yellow man and you're going around to eat a little tiny things There goes to go going around and around you're eating them, there's a cherry here it comes,

then there's a little blue guy, you can eat them, it's pretty boring, it's pretty shit, people like it in the 80s because back then they didn't have good games. Right? Very strong. Very strong. It's perfect. Now intense tune, it, Tom, would you like to steal? I was there! Clarke, any idea what game he was singing about? Well, it was Pac-Man money. It was indeed Pac-Man. It was, and I'm going to give a Ben... Don't feel like you have to clap, that's fine, man.

No. APPLAUSE I'm going to give Ben Partridge, I think I'm going to give him... I'm going to give him three again there I think I'm going to give him, I'm going to give him three again there, three out of five for the song. It's Batman and Ball. We'll deal with this. We're not dealing with this later mate.

I'm not having this chat with him. It's Batman and a wheel. It's a good question. Yeah. Furn, your turn now. Can you please stick about this game to the tune of Tetris? Oh, bang! It's an absolute bang. I'm sure you don't need to hear it again.

Tom, what... The Vivaldi's four seasons of computer game theme tunes. Fair to say? Absolutely. No one here is arguing with that. So Tom, what is Furn singing about to the tune of Tetris off we go? He has a little animal with blue hair and he has a little de-fresh in of that. He goes on a mission to do something. It's a bit like Mario but he's a blue animal.

He has a little blue animal with his very spiky on his back and real life this animal doesn't look like this but in the game he has a many things face. That's all I can think to see about that. Very nice. Well, I mean I wasn't sure for a while. Sure. In which case talking? Can I steal? He's ready to steal. But then the clue arrived.

He goes on a mission to do something. Peptid rocks. No, it's only one clue he gave me could be. Because old Princess Zelda was always on a mission to do something. He goes on a mission to do something. I mean, it doesn't mean everyone. Really good. I was the mission.

I just went on a mission. I had no aim, really. It was just a good stretch for a general mission. It's a good time, really. I think it's to get on a chief. Tom, I'm going to have to push you for an answer. Sonnet, the head jog. Exactly right. Yes.

Yes. And this is the other devious face. I always thought you had quite an... Well, I don't look like a normal head jog. So I'm like, who are three? And I'm also going to give you five out of five there, not just because you gave us five out of five in Edinburgh all those years ago, but also because

that basically sounds like all the Scottish indie bands I listened to. Pretty much exactly the same. I would honestly apply an EP if you just think you know. Wait a second. Yeah, great. So five points of furthering this. Clarke, you're my friend. Your song is the end theme from Super Mario World. It's a deep cut again. Oh my god. It's the end theme, we all know it. Ben Walker, will you give us a little blast of it please. That's enough. No, no. For everyone who's completed Super Mario World, that will be very familiar to you. That's a real salty number. It is a salty number. It's completed Super Mario World. That'll be very familiar to you. Okay.

That's a real salty number. It is a salty number. It's a real show tune. It really is. It's from Lion King, the musical. So, Ben, can you work out? Come the buffalo, jump to the left and look up below. Oh my god, an ambition just to do something.

Okay, so Ben, can you work out what Song Clarke is singing about? Off we go. MUSIC We are in the world, world, west. We're kihiki, world, world. Stunt at that, that's misleading. But it's about a cowboy, and he shoots his gun at at people And then it's like a really expansive story that goes on for hours and hours I've got it and liked it very much but I still haven't finished the game

You can skin, buffalos and stuff I want lost allegory, a bare skin and that made me really upset and when that happens you really have to start evaluating your life and what you do with your time because it's a game but it essentially becomes a bit like a job and you put so much time into it and then you sit there and you think, well, I should have a proper job, but actually earn money, not earn fake money on the game. LAUGHTER Oh my goodness.

Carkey. Right. You didn't tell me that when you said, can I still, you meant the show? LAUGHTER God dammit man. That is, we should pitch this musical. That was amazing. That was some nifty, you're gonna be getting a call from show stoppers in the morning.

They're suing you. And so, Ben Partridge, any idea what popular video game Klaaki was obsessing about there? I think it's Red Dead Redemption. It is indeed Red Dead Redemption 2. And so you get your point for that. And Clarky, I'd be churly, not to give you the full five points. So five points to Clarky there.

Can you tell us about losing the bearskin, the legendary bearskin? It really worked in this saloon type set. We're honest with saloon set. I'm a little bit on the piano, she was great wasn't she? That was really amazing there, you really think called the Ivory's. So, but you said Ben, what are the scores at the end of that round to the tune of Pac-Man? Tom and Furner, 22, Bennett, Bennett, 26. Oh, very strong there.

Well, from the pixelated world of computer games to the all-too-real world of flat-based gripery, it's B-brothers. Well, if you've got a problem, don't call it a problem, if you've got a problem, call it a B. If you've got a B, B, maybe we can help you, B, from the sunny eigenbeats.

Yes, it's B-brothers, but each week we ask our palis to sort out a flat-shared based beef and today's one comes from Ryan, who is in the audience. Ryan, are you there? Oh, yeah. Err, err, err, err. You want a stag to, Ryan? Err. Quite the opposite. He writes. A hendon.

How's that? Err. Err. He writes. A hinder. How's that? LAUGHTER He's this different, Graham. How's mate keeps binning the bottles I'm saving to brew my own kombucha in? Oh, Ryan. Oh. Okay, yes.

So, again, we knew this was going to be a contentious one because normally most people sort of like the person who's in the room. Ryan, Ryan, so you're angry for the listener at home, has a big beard. We could pretty edit that bit out, we all know. We all know, we all know. So Ben and Ben, you are on Ryan's side. First and top.

You are on the side of Ryan's flatmate. Do you want to give a name at Ryan's flatmates? I'm not really sure which one it is. Oh. It's a remand. It's a remand. They can say all kinds of things. So does the computer.

OK, so it's one of your, do you want to, if you had to name and shame one of them, which one do you reckon it might be? Ryan? Ryan, who knows you? Somebody give you some computer. Quickly. one of them, which one do you reckon it might be? Ryan? Ryan? Who knows? Somebody give us some kombucha, quickly! He's lost conscious. Oh yeah, Laura. Laura. Probably Nora. Okay, so you're on Nora's side. But before all of that, let's have some cross-examination.

Does anyone have any questions for Ryan about? I do. Yes, okay. What is kombucha? it's a good question I'm not really sure how do you make it what's in it no one knows it's like a fuzzy vinegar basically it's a fermented tea this meant to be really good for you it's good for gut health isn't it supposed It's supposed to be good. Fucking gut health. So all people say these days it's good for gut health. Mate, I think I think of all the people here you should probably be listening to that.

Oh! Oh God, we've all felt your names. You've got a healthy sized gut, I can tell you that, but isn't the deal with the gut, you just stick shit in and it sort it out. Oh no. Don't stick, don't stick shit into your gut. That comes out. Oh. Have you ever attempted to make this kombucha of which you speak? Not yet, because the bowls keep going missing. What are the bottles?

I just, you know, pretty steady, class bottles with a nice strong stopper. Um, like Grohlsch. Yeah. I just, you know, pretty steady class bottles with a nice strong stopper. Like Groge. Yeah. So they beer bottles? No. Okay. You're being very cagey about these bottles. Where are these bottles coming from?

Have you bought them specifically? They are empty kombucha bottles, which are... Oh, I got it. So you bought kombucha? You bought shop bought kombucha. It's shop bought kombucha. Which is poor now. It's down pricey. Very high-end. I went to my second car.

You know you can make it yourself. So that's the plan. So kombucha is about sort of between five and seven pound of bottle isn't it? It's quite expensive. We're in a big one. About three quid for a wee one. Okay, it's still expensive. They're three quid bottle is still pretty pricey.

We're not, we're not, we're not of us made a money. Despite this podcasting empire we're currently sitting in the middle of it. But yeah, so it's expensive, so you've bought the bottles, you've thought I'm going to brew my own at home, and somebody is thwarting your plans by fingers crossed recycling, but we don't know. Does anyone have any more questions? How many people would you live with? There's five of us total. Five of us total. So it could be, I mean, we've thrown all runs to the bus here. It could be anyone. Yeah.

Why don't you put the bottles somewhere private? Oh, hang on a second! I need to speak to him. Right, I want to talk to him. We're all thinking it. All right, let me apologise right now. Ben is had a drink. I didn't say anything, but he should get in somewhere private, like his bedroom.

Oh, okay, sure, fair enough. Now, any other questions from either side about Ben's, about Ryan's con butcher? Have you talked to your housemates about this plan to make con butcher? I did send a text message about it in a sort of passive-aggressive manner this morning, yeah? I've been sitting on it. You said this morning, do you want to read out the Passag text? Yes, let's hear this. Let's hear this. You know what? We love a bit of RG Bargit here at Flat Shares, man.

We really should. We love an aggressive WhatsApp thread. LAUGHTER What we're all about. OK. OK. You ready, Maya? That's quite the time, yeah. Just a heads up. Oh!

Just a heads up. Just a heads up. It's Gable Reel. It's a heads up. Just a heads up. Oh! Just a heads up. It's Gable Reel! Just a heads up. It's Gable Reel! Just a heads up. It's Gable Reel! Has anybody... What time was this set?

This was 9am. Just a heads up. Just a heads up. I know, yeah. Just a head... Just a breakfast heads up. Yeah. I do have a plan for those brown glass bottles.

Oh! It's holding on to them. I'm hazing myself a little bit. Ryan's talked to himself out of this. Yeah, I know, but appreciate they're not wanted hanging around. So once I've rewashed them emphasis on the re, I'll pop them in my cupboard.

But if they could be spared the recycling, that'd be grand. Oh, that'd be grand. That'd be grand. That'd be grand. It's dripping with the phrase, I'm a total prick, isn't it? It's dripping really. But you know what, you've got the self awareness to realise that, Ryan? And you know what, more powder you got?

Normally, I'm actually pretty unbiased, but this is a cut-knit. Cut and dry, casing it. This is, I'm pretty sure. Do we need to even debate it? We do, hopefully that is enough. That is enough information for our teams to make their cases. So without further ado, Ben Partridge, you have one minute to begin the case for the prosecution. Now remember, you're on right-hand side, if there is a side, and your minute begins now.

Members of the jury. just a heads up. Guilt Health is very, very important. And what you haven't yet seen as we haven't yet as an endoverdance is Ryan's gut is petite, it's like a car crash. A healthy gut, like mine, it's like the Eden project in there. It's like a healthy biome full of plants and tourists and occasionally, so fearless, bextable, do a concert in there.

It's a healthy environment, but Ryan's is like the back of a Yates's wine lodge. And he needs that kombucha. I rest my case. It's all right. Thank you very much. It's strong. Okay, to open the case for the defence, you have exactly one minute. Fern Brady, off you go. Oh Oh shit. Sorry. What was happening?

Wow. So Fern said it was all key to ask. No, it's always it's always okay to ask what's happening. So basically, um, we just we sort of did this. We sort of did this podcast. I'm on the come. I'm on the computer man. You're on the computer man side. You're on the computer man side, you've got a minute to make your case for. No, no, no, no, we're against the computer man.

You're on everyone else's side. Oh, I mean. I think you should try making his own kefir, because you can just leave milk to go bad in your room. Here we go. Get into it. Okay, so your minute begins now. Can I just say what I said?

I mean, you actually can. Can you say it really slowly, though? Yeah. I think kombucha man should be making his own kefir. It'll cause less hassle. Just get a sex-printered milk for Tesco and let it go off in your room. Put some kefir out.

Is that going to cause less hassle, Fern? Well, they'll think he's smelly, but they all already think he's not a Norbert. Anybody who's making a compurture receiving the bottles for a compurture? They can't drink compurture, but I don't tell anyone about it. Okay, fine, yeah, great, that's Fern, ready, everybody, Fern. Brainy there with the case for the defense Ryan, how do you think it's going so far pretty bird? Yep Can you head up mate?

so Clarkie you're gonna conclude the case for the prosecution now remember you're on Ryan's side. Yes. Your minutes begins now Well, Ryan I feel for you buddy. I know what it's like to have something that you've gone through great pains to get your hands on, and at the very last minute, get it taken away from you. What happened to me was, I was playing red-dead red-dimension two, and I had this legendary bear skin. a'r a'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r

gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r and then two seconds left. Oh, gone. Basically, if you've got a problem, don't Bartlett up. LAUGHTER APPLAUSE Very strong work there. APPLAUSE All that remains is for the case for the defence

to be concluded by Mr Thomas Perry. Now, Tommy, you're going to do it as yourself. No. I'm going to do it in the style of a deep south defence lawyer from a John Grisham novel. This is... Mr Fan Shaw Standard. This sounds Grishov novel. Mr. Fanshore Standard. This sounds out of this world.

Yes. Tom, your minute should you need it, or indeed Mr. Fanshore Standard, your minute should you need it, begins. Now. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Fanshore Standard here, providing and presiding. Hell, hell, we've been listening to a lot of big words tonight from them, their lawyers

over there, from the big city. Hell, they come with their books and their scientific calculators. Hell, I've been seeing your baffled faces. Round here we don't know nothing about none of that damn Japanese drink. Co-witchy butcher, I don't know. Round here we need wikofibings. Juice in the can. They have them damn medical specialists there talking about the health of a man's belly. What defines a man?

What defines the health of a man? Well, as you bill it. Let me tell you a story here now. Old science teacher, you probably remember him back from the school days. Dr. Sad. Dr. Sad, they used to call him. Born his real name. Buddy, wasn't very happy. But wrong, Dr. Sad, we used to say, hell little children, they know the truth. Can't hide nothing from them, Tiddler's.

Smell it, tear it from a yad away. You know why so sad, Dr. Sad? So many wrong, something wrong with. Up here, no. Down here. No. Regular is clockwork, Dr. Sad. You used to have to leave the lesson to drop on. You used to have to leave the lesson to drop on.

Something wrong here. Way down there in the belly like. Turns out we hit Kielderboy. Anyway, when you know, you know. It's in the belly. The defense rests, Your Honor. Oh, fans, you're standing, presiding, and indeed providing. Actually, Dr. Sanders, trialist tomorrow. So we'll also be adjudicating that.

Now, I can't adjudicate this case because well, you know So instead I'm gonna call up on our pleasant audience to decide now if you think Ben and Ben and therefore Ryan is in the right I would like you to applaud now Not a landslide But if you think Fanshawer and Fern made the best case, I'd like you to applaud now. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Ryan, I think that decision was made before anyone spoke a word. You know, I'm having so much fun.

Time really is flying by. Let's put an end to that as we endure the quick, far-round jingle. Cool. by it let's put an end to that as we endure the quickfire round jingle. This is the quickfire round. It's the round that goes really quickly Which is why it really ought to have a quick introduction But it does hurt It should have a quick introduction That would be nice. Yes, that's right, this round is a really quick one.

It's a really fast round. It's swift, it's rapid, it's speedy. I've just found a Thessaurant. I found a Thessaurant on the Ben's shelf, And I'm reading it to you. Thessaurant. This round is fleet. It's express. It's expeditious.

This round is prompt. It's ready. It's express, it's expeditious. This round is prompt, it's ready, it's sudden, it's hasty, and that's why it's introduction. Should also be hurried, and cursory and perfunct. It should be brisk, it should be brief and fleeting and nimble. This round should be agile and spry and sprightly and alert. It's going to be active. It's going to be lively, vivacious and animated. This round is spirited, it's sharp and keen and acute, but the introduction is stopped. Oh no! Oh no! Oh well then here it is the quick fire roll! Yeah, so, um... Firm was ordering a ruba during the day. I could see, yeah, so was I Okay, so the quick fire round

There's just one thing I think we should address From the start of the jingle I Think you'll remember That I said it was a thessirous. But Clarky here thinks it's said a different way. He thinks it's a dinosaur. So what is the right answer is it Thessaressoress. At the Soros is a dictionary, a lexicon, a wordblock, an encyclopedia, or sometimes a treasury or a repository. My theory is, or enunciate it, or voice it or say it, or proclaim it or declare it.

Well, that's enough on with the quick fire Circular So this quick far round yes, wow is right Tom. The quick fire round is all about using gutter language. I'm going to ask you simple trivia questions. I want you to give me not just the answer, but a swear word to accompany it. So, if the question is, what type of animal is Garfield? I want to hear a god damn cat.

I'm starting with the mild squares there to give you something to work up to, you know, like, cunt. So, points will be added for creative swearing, for explain in fixation. However, points will be deducted for repeating a swear. Instead of buzzers, if you think you have the right answer, shout out your first name. Tom.

Hang on a sec. Ben, let's hear that now. Ben. Ben. And Tom and Fern. Tom. Thank. Off. We. Go. What sitcom feature the characters, such as Monica. Tom. Tom. Tom. Fucking friends. Fucking friends friends in what country would you find the pyramids?

Ben Ben, country Egypt. Oh He's gone hard early Minister of the UK from 1990 to 1997 Tony Blair. No, there wasn't Tony Blair We'd like to hear us where with it as well. Please turn I wasn't Tony Blair. John Major. We'd like to hear us where with it as well, please, Fern. John, John can't me, John.

I think we had counting already, but I accept count as well. Basically, he's got the right thing. That was the first time he said that. I accept count, yes, absolutely. What's the fastest bird? Oh, Ben is the word you're looking for. Ben is the word you're looking for. I'll be a prick in prayer, go and falcon.

It is indeed. How many seconds are there in three minutes? Tom, Tom. Shit in 180 seconds, mate. I enjoyed the mate on the end. I was Australian for that. No, you weren't. What words?

What word links Bermuda, Love, Equal, App, Tom? Ben, I think Ben just picked you the most there, Tom, I'm sorry. A God's Blood triangle. Whoa! What Sandra Bullock film takes its name from the scientific principle discovered by Isaac Newton? Blood. Ben.

Ben. Blood, Ben. Yes. Blood, Ben. He's using his, because Ben Parches is a stage name. What you don't realise? Blood or Rock? Yes, blood.

Cock gravity. Cock gravity. I'm going to accept it. According to singer Doa Lepa, what does she have three of? Tom. Tom. Titting, tits. No.

What? No, she doesn't have three tits. I'm in the song. Could I stay up? No, no, the song. She'll go from total regal. Rules. She does have... Hunting rules. You can't have come to her again. So, you're in the song. Could I stay up? I'm in the song. She'll go from total record. Rules. She does have...

Hunting rules. You can't have come to your game, either. So, I'm in the banking rules. Wanking rules, I'll take that. Oh, we've all got one of the rules. Better in your appearance, then. Say, parents flag, a.k. the flag of Cornwall is comprised of two colours, black and what.

Oh, Tom! Oh, Tom. Shagging white. Shagging white. She would have for Barry White, isn't it? Shagging white Shaggin white You're a for Barry white isn't it? Shaggin white my tinder name He's a racist William Webb Ellis is often credited as Ben yes, I'm a miss rugby

Is a miss is Where I play that game though. I'm gonna I'm gonna allow it. Who played James Bond in the movie tomorrow and ever dies? Tom! Tom. Faaaak! Akin! Bears the twat, prostitut!

You just about saved it there. What's the name of the character created by Jacqueline Wilson who lives in a care home? Tom! Tom. Bugger me, it's Tracy Baker. LAUGHTER What is a Rhino's horn made out of? Ben. Ben. Tom, Tom. Bugga means Tracy B. LAUGHTER What is a rhinoshorn made out of? Ben. Ben.

Med keratin. Well, hair is the art survive god, but I'll take keratin, absolutely. What is the name... We're going to take some keratin after the show, actually. LAUGHTER Disappearance to another K-hole? What is the name? What is the name? What is the name for grilled bread?

Bowl back toast. Bowl back toast. And with that, that is the end of the round. That is our time. But before we hear our final scores, Fern, Ben, have you got anything to plug? Fern, you're off on tour aren't you? Oh yeah, I'm going on tour from the... Right now, in an Uber! From September. Age is away. No that's perfect, these come out like ages away so it's fine.

So September go and see you're on tour, we can find you on Twitter and Facebook and all that kind of stuff for the details. Eddie critics listening, go along, Sharpe and your pens. And also, don't sharpen your pens. Guys, if you're a critic, if you're going to sharpen anything, I'll go with pencil. Sharpe and that, shitting pencil. I wouldn't know. I'm an artist. I'm a creator. It's a very sharp pen. Pen Partridge.

Yes, anything to plug. Yes, if you found this podcast hardgoing, may I suggest another one? I make the Beef and Dairy Network podcast, go to www.bifanddairynetwork.com. It's really one of my absolute favorite podcasts. It's really fantastic. It's the best. And I'll. It's really fantastic. It's really, really good.

And I'll also please leave a review for this podcast if you enjoyed it. And donate. For. And, uh, I'll do. Yeah, leave a review on iTunes, five stars, I was going to do it. And, uh, yeah, and also, please donate if you enjoy the podcast. So, producer Ben, Yeah, money.com is where you want to go for that.

Producer Ben, let's hear those final scores. Well, they're very close. Very close tonight. In fact, they're so close at the same. Both of you have 33. Oh my God. Wow. Well, that means that neither team

has to clean out the gutters and both get the drink and until they fall into one. Thanks to our guests Ben Partridge and Fern Brady, we've been Pat Me see you next time on, Flash Esplan now! Pat Me's partridge stand up, he's your battle host, David Park and Tom Perry with special guest Ben Partridge and Fern Brady. He's my Pat Me's producer, Ben Walker. Thanks to everybody who came to that scene, the recording, to Emma Corsion for helping out and to the presence for having us. Pat Me's partridge stand there is a first production for the FI cast and the Internet. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us.

Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us.

Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you so much We've got some live shows coming up, and if you're in or around the southeast, then come on in and see us record in London town. We've got one at the Soho Theatre, and the date for that is... Mate, that's Wendy F. And then we've got one at the Urdebele on London's glittering River Thames. It's not on the River Thames, it's not on the boat.

I've not read the blurb, but it's close to a river. The River Thames. It's a very big room as well, so we'd love it if you could come. It's Clark East birthday, and it's on the 6th of June. Yes, big room, next to a big river. The river tends. It's a very big room as well so we'd love it if you could come. It's Clarkies birthday and it's on the 6th of June. Yes, big room next to a big river. Big room? Big river. We should say as well our guests for the side of the theatre on May the 20th are going to be Tessa Coates and Stevie Martin from the nobody panic podcast and they are absolutely brilliant. They're also from Massie Dad the Skechting if you remember those guys who were brilliant.

So come along and see that and that's pretty much it. Please stay listening for the neighborhood watch Roll Call for our patrons. Really? Well, my wife threw that sentence. You know what it is guys, you know what I mean? Have a good one everyone. Love you. Pray silence for the Patreon neighborhood watch roll call. She's been round the back of bins. It's Amy Wilkins. He's down on Bended Knee is Matthew C. He's down on Bended Knee. It's Tinneverly. He's down on Bended Knee. It's James Ellison.

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What her name is that, a Thadine, I like it. A Thadine, nice. Can is that Athardine, I like it. Athardine. Nice. Can't complain, E. Whenever I see, Roxanne Cheney. She has a phone that's a burner. It's Christine Turner. Stay happy and gay, Stephen Barclay. Change your socks.

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His legs are a gabe, it's Daniel Pabe. And finally, thanks Adrian. Oh, thanks Adrian. Obviously, if you would like to have your name read out, then donate to the patreon at patreon.com forward slash pappiesflatshare.