Pappy's Flatshare - Slamdown w/ Harry Hill & Catherine Bohart (Throw the Ball Back) S13E09

Episode Date: April 3, 2023

Neither “Tom!” nor “Ben!” want to Throw the Ball Back… so Matthew says we’re gonna have to have a Flatshare Slamdown!Matthew Crosby, Tom Parry Wicks, and Ben Clark recorded live at The Phoenix pub with Harry Hill and Catherine BohartWithCatherine Bohart - https://twitter.com/CatherineBohartTrusty Hogs - https://linktr.ee/TrustyHogsHarry Hill - https://twitter.com/harryhillHarry Hill's Noise (yes, it's a real thing!) - https://play.acast.com/s/harry-hills-noisePappy’s Twitter - https://twitter.com/pappystweetPappy's Insta - https://www.instagram.com/pappyscomedy/Support us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareFind tickets to all our live shows here - pappyscomedy.com/liveEdited by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Greetings, Lister dear, I'm Tom. I'm Ben. I'm Matthew and welcome to another exciting episode of Pappy's Flat Share Slam Down. Truly an exciting episode. There's an element of wish for film with this two absolutely fabulous guests and a terrific evening at London's glittering Phoenix Pearl. That's absolutely right. Yeah, two guests we've been trying to get for a while. Catherine Bohart, of course, she wanted to have her own Mac Fest, but she caught the novel coronavirus

and wasn't able to perform with us. So it's been a while waiting for her to come on. And also Harry Hill, who I think I've probably been asking to come on the podcast for close to 10 years. I think I've, and he's been batting it away. And then at one point, I mean, I used to text him a lot and just like, well, you come on it and he'd always go, well, maybe this date can't really make it work.

And then eventually I asked him just face to face, I said, look, will you do it? And he said, I pride myself on never having done a podcast. And he really didn't know which way the win was blowing, did he? It was a different time. It was a different time. He's on the wrong side of his screen. But you know what?

He was happy to admit that he was in the wrong in that instance. And he came on the podcast and he was great. Catherine and Harry, both fantastic guests. He was happy to admit that he was in the wrong in that instance and he came on the podcast and he was great. Catherine and Harry both fantastic guests. This was a really, really fun episode to record. I can't wait for you to hear it. I'm very, very excited. I hope you enjoy it.

If you'd like to hear all the bonus stuff, all the stuff that we cut out, including a little extra chat with Harry and Catherine, get over to the Patreon guys. Oh, please. Get us over to the Patreon, please do Patreon.. Oh, please. Oh, please. Get over to the Patreon, please do. Patreon.com forward slash Pappy's flat share. Well, you can also get discounted tickets and there may be a few left discounted tickets for the next flat share slam down,

which is happening on the 25th of April. Which comes, comes a pace, doesn't it? How do you mean? Well, they're rolling around quickly, that's what I'm saying. They are rolling around quickly, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, this one's on the 25th of April, so you've got, it's about a month away. So you've got a bit of time to think about it.

But you haven't got a lot of time when it comes to buying tickets because the tickets are, they're going fast. It's hot. Take it. It's hot. It's a hot. It's a hot ticket. It's a hot ticket. Well, that's what happens when it comes to pace.

This is the thing. If your shows come to pace, they come a hot ticket. Come in the hot and fast. I think they go hand in hand, those two things. Very much so. You're just getting a hot ticket if you're not going at a pace, you know.

That's straight. Too right, too right, man. Too right. Patreon.com, forward slash Pappy's flat share if you want to get the discounted tickets or just go to Pappy's Comedy.com forward slash live to get tickets for the Avy Clark, Olga Cock and John Robbins as guest captain

in Paris Stead podcast on the 25th of April at the Phoenix London's glittering Phoenix, as it's known. Soren image of that where John Robbins face has replaced mine on the infamous pyramid photo of the three of us on each other's backs. Yes. And it felt, it did feel funny in Mustama. Really?

Really? Not funny in Mustama, Xe and J are there. It looked too good for my lighting. You just looked so good together. It fits a bit too well. Well, when I just looked right, when I did it, I sort of deliberately made his head slightly bigger, as you can see who it is, and B,

so it didn't look like we had gone against the bro code and recreated the photo with him. I thought you were going to say to match the size of my head. Yeah, to cover your massive head was the main reason. Yeah. That's it. But the thing about your head's tom, it comes a pace. Oh yeah?

It comes a pace. It does. Hot and fast. It's about the same pace as my body really. Yeah. Thankfully. You're a beautifully proportioned man. Thank you.

And well, let's enjoy this episode of Beautifully Proportion Podcasting. Tornado! What is it, Matthew? What is it, you're silly sausage? You are a silly sausage. I have a little silly cocktail sausage. Oh, how do you... It's just cold.

Listen, that's... That blue-and-ball has come over the fence again. One of you two has got to throw it back to the neighbours. Oh. Oh. Oh. I'm not dealing with those guys again. They can play there every time a ball goes over their side.

It's ridiculous. Come on, man. Let me do my 10 pin bowling in peace. Show it out. Tom, what about you? Well, it's not going to be me, Mathieu, because I had a terrible time. My neighbour kept on throwing the ball over the fence,

so it was getting me really annoyed. So in the end, I just went out into the back garden, I ripped it all down, I went into the street, I found the nearest passerby, and I said, take this, you massive bell-end, and let me tell you, they really took offence. Oh. You see, they really took offence.

Tom, parry. They really took offense You see they really took offense. Oh, Harry. They really took offense Good they really took offense. How could you how could you hate it at first and then like? He's a charismatic man. That's what it is anyway listen There is only one way to settle this we're gonna have to have a Flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash what a thrill. Goodness gracious, that comes open my fence one more time, put the fucking knife through it. I'm loads of landlords. Matthew Crosby, let's beat my ball boys, it's Tom Perry and Ben, it's Clark.

Oh! But now you can't throw the ball back on your own. Who have you brought with you with the handling skills, Ben? Who have you brought this week? I've bought my hair twin, Catherine Bohar! Catherine Bohar to see you! Oh! Can I booking a lesbian for a ball handling issue?

Is it a tricky ball? I respected! I respected. Yeah, we're gingiversis! Wow! Wow! The gingiversis, yeah! Salmon Rushy's less-known book! Yes! Wow The ginger versus yeah salmon rushes less bone book

Way less trouble for that one But what kind of a person are you to live with? Well What kind of a person are you to live with? Um, oh, okay. Well, listen, I think that I keep the bus on the road. And I think you live on a bus. I would never. I would barely even get on a bus. No, I live with, I, what kind of person might live with? I would say that my classmates would say that because I lived with them,

the house was always gleaming, and there were always fresh flowers, and they were a little bit scared all the time, but that was fine, because provided they checked with me, they could do anything they wanted. Sure. I mean, say what you like about North Korea, it's clean as fuck, isn't it? Yes, it is! That was close! You're going to eat dinner often.

And you are not unclear on the rules. Exactly, yep. No one's ever in debt. They're right there. Yeah, I'd say I'm... I don't live without you anymore. Right. And that is best, I think. Your choice, their choice, just general circumstances. Well, if we're going on who let?

I'm thrilled to live alone. I actually am. I like the stuff where I left it. Yeah, exactly. I was messing with your stuff. No one's messing with my stuff. No one's inviting their friends. Listen, it's... Basically, thank you for leaving the house. It's what we're saying to you. Yeah. Thank you so much. Tom, who have you brought with you this week? Well, Matthew Terrible News. No. The Jamba Rees in danger.

Please, no. We've got the clothes in ceremony coming up and I've got to undertake a perilous stunt. How dare you? All of our guests are very values. I've invited my stunt double. It's Mr. Harry Hill. Yeah! Thank you, Harry. Thank you for coming on the show Harry. No my pleasure. I thought it had already started. I thought we just did this about ten minutes ago. Oh no that was just that was just for the people in the room.

They got a little bit of extra bonus concert. I do apologise. But if you could pretend to still be happy to be on the show. I'm not talking about it. I think we've lost Harry's goodwill before the theme tune. Was that all your willing's conscience? I'm so sorry. No, no, please, don't apologize. What kind of a person are you to live in, above a new impatient one? I'm very easy. I always do my chores. Yeah. What do you do? No, you say what chores? What? Okay, so I forgot you did text me with the script.

Also you say you're a grown man who presumably owns the house. Why do you have to be given chores? I think it's what chores is what he's after. only owns the house, why do you have to be given chores? I think it's what chores is what he's after. I'm not saying anything until I hear... Catherine's rubbish at Knock Knock Jones. And at living with men. Yes, it's a go-on, sorry. Knock Knock, I live alone.

I always do my chores. What chores? I have a half a bit of please. Yes please. Come on, yes! That's not entertainment, I don't know what it is. See the young faces light up. That's the children come to collect them. LAUGHTER So our guests are ready to have a ball, but have they got the upper body strength to throw it back? Let's find out as we play round one! CHEERING

APPLAUSE Alright, okay. Get to the wall, okay. Throw back. Throw the bow back. Throw back. Throw the ball back. This is the first time I keep the ball. I keep it really hard. I hit my brother on the bus and landed in your yard.

Yaaah! Yaaah! So back! Throw the ball back! You're gonna be disneyed. Throw the ballback! Whoa, whoa've got my football boots on But wait a second, where's my little brother gone? Throwback!

Yes, I've got no brother, I know balls So I guess instead I will just run into this wall Go! Oh my goodness. Tom, can I ask a question? No, you can't. I also have a question. May I? No, I can't ask a question if you like.

As a guest, no? We'll leave that social media show. I'll get you. So the first round is called Talking Balls. I'm going to give each of our players the name and description of a obscure sport. They have to give us three definitions. The real one plus two they've made up on the spot. It's up to their opposing team to work out which sport is the real one? Two points if they get it right.

If they don't, the points go to the other team. Now we're going to start with Tom. Ben and Catherine, you are guessing. Now, Tom, as you know, I don't know a lot about sports. Hopefully, this isn't a obscure one. It's rugby league. What is rugby league? Give us the note. The first sport is bowteoshi.

Hope I'm saying that right. How are we spelling it? Teoshi. B-O-Hyphen-T-A-O-S-H-I. Bowteoshi, how else would you spell it? Bowteoshi. Bowteoshi. Bowteoshi.

Bowteoshi. Bowteoshi. Now, Tom Perry, would you give us three definitions of the sport of bowteoshi? Bowteoshi is a Japanese game. Second, careful. Here's a Korean game. Bo Toshii, it's a Japanese game where you have to hit your partner's ball with another

ball. Why? Wait for it. Bawler's ball with another ball. Oh. Why? Wait for it. So, if their ball hits your ball, you score points. Okay. But if their ball hits your ball,

wait, did you just laugh the same thing? No. But where is the ball that you're hitting? It's not. Everyone has a ball and they throw the ball that you're hitting? Is it not? Everyone has a ball and they throw the ball, and it's if your ball hits their ball. You're throwing it at the same time? Well, this is photo-tashing.

I'm just trying to verify that they were born. That's photo-tashing. That's photo-tashing, man. That's what they say. So how do they decide which ball is hitting which ball? So it's a game that's often, at least, a lot of debates, because it's open to interpretation Yeah, that's the first one. Okay

Bo Teoshi is It's a mirroring game Where you have to copy your partner's movements. Sorry, whose side am I on these side? If you copy his movements, what he talks, that would be really useful. So you have 20 kids on one side. That's going to play so well on the podcast. Yeah, you can imagine what's going on there, can't you?

Yeah. So you have 20 kids on one side, 20 kids on the other side, and this team have to make it as difficult for the other team to mirror their images. Do you remember it? So can I just say it really is worth coming along to the live shows? So again, judges watch and if they think one of them isn't mirroring the other one, so basically you have to do things that you think the other person can't mirror. And it's done crucially,, to the rhythm of a drum. Ah! Ah! Can I ask, in the mirroring, do balls ever touch balls?

There are no balls in Boltashi. Okay, okay. Okay. How do you call it if I should be a judge? How do you call it if I should be a judge? I'll tell you now, we haven't put that many rules down. The qualification process of becoming a judge the on the piece of paper. Tom, the third definition of bowtayashi, please.

Bowtayashi. I like how you say it different, little bit differently every day. That's the different ways. Okay, yes, sir. Bowtayashi. One pole, two poles. Wooden poles. Not two Polish people on holiday in Japan. LAUGHTER

Oh no, what's that? If this is two poles, that have to hit each other at the same time, I'm going to be very upset. Two poles, one pole and another pole. 150 people there. 150 people here go get the fucking poll boy. Don't you think? Bull Tashi?

So I'll tell you now you can't say none of them as much as you might want to. So we've got the ball hitting a ball, we've got the mirroring game and we've got the poll, poll, 150 people on each team go get that pole. Which one do you think it is? Catherine Ben, how are you thinking at this stage? Which one would you rather play as well? I was gonna say, I'd play all three of them.

Come to my sport stage. Oh, great. We're different. Oh yeah. Yeah. Look, my reasoning is as follows, Tom couldn't figure out the rules to the first version. Norikati remember which ball was hitting which, so I'm guessing that that's out. I think often, often the simplest explanation is the logical one, so the easiest version is the pole version, so I'm interested in that as an option, but I do think there was a lot more locking down, a lot more specificity in the second description, which makes me think that maybe it's the second one. I feel like you're not keeping up with me. I don't know that the...

It's a weird place to be and where you think it's a brag to be like, I can read. I don't know. What do you think? I think. Well, here's what I think. I think the first one, it felt like he was deliberately fumbling over the thing. He can just get it right? I was more about the delivery than the content. And they say that in Voltaxie. It's all about the delivery.

I should have delivered a ball into the air whilst building somebody and catching a pole. Yeah. But I like the third one. Do you? Why? Like the third one. Do you Why Tunfiddy Tunfini do up all Motashi I Don't think you get 300 people I just I don't think you get 300 people with that much spare time, but then

But then all these men are here, so I don't know The tricky thing about about Tashi is getting enough players to play it takes fucking ages to I think I think it's too. I think it's two. I think it's number two. You think it's the mirror? I think about blind date. Because I think that you own, that's the only one that had like clear rules and also a plausible number of people.

What are you? Are you happy with that? As a team? I'll allow it. Oh. Wow. Oh, did I? That's not teamwork at all.

No no no. And also did I ask for permission? I was like, one minute. So yeah, let's go number two. I can't remember what that was. But the mirroring was number two. Oh the mirroring was good. But do you think it's one?

Do you think it's maybe one? Where he messed it up? Can he just give us fake rules? What is this? What is this? This is potassiumashy apparently Which one are you gonna go? I'm gonna have to push it for an art. Are you gonna go for two? Let's go for two. Okay. All right Tom. Parry. Please put it out of our misery and tell us exactly how you played Potashy Voltashy a Japanese catch-of-the-fleg star game were two teams of 150 players

Each attempt to bring their opposing teams pole Oh! Oh! Each attempt to bring their opposing teams poll! Woo! Voltash is. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

Don't be. Don't be. Man, do you do anything except a chore? What chore? I'm sorry. Half a bitter. I'm so sorry. You're right.

I'm so sorry. You're right. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry you're right. Hey, Catobe. Catobe, don't worry about it. You can make it all up because it's your turn next. Your sport. Oh, I hate that. I know. Listen, I want to work for the collective good. Well, listen, it's only the first question of a lot of questions that we'll do tonight. We're going to play this round for 45 minutes.

So don't worry. Okay. Catobe, your sport is Gapel Hangun. What is Gapel Hang worry. Okay. Catherine, your sport is gaffelhangen. What is gaffelhangen? Okay, three definitions of the sport of gaffelhangen, Catherine Boehart's, whenever you fancy. Okay. Um, gaffelhangen. Obviously, Dutch.

You're all so kidd. Yes, I think we were. Were we not? I was also a little bit hungry to the word have that effect on anyone else. Just me? Okay. It's Dutch. And it is... Oh. Therefore played in... The Netherlands.

And no. And it is just a Dutch word for essentially what is the Olympic sport of speed climbing. Speed climbing in Holland. Yeah. Yeah. There's no way that's what it's famous for. There's no way to climb. It's an indoor sport, Harry Hill.

You want to get me on the technicalities. That is a boldering sport indoors. People do it indoors. That's what you have to do, because they have no hills as you're correct. Why is Harry Hill being the hippo-gett? It's a little on the nose. The other interesting fact about Holland is that there's never been a successful TV detective, a Dutch TV detective, a Dutch TV detective,

because they wear the wooden shoes. They would hear them creeping up on them. I think that's right. I changed my mind. Apart from Van der Waal. I changed my mind. It's a German. This time it's a German sport.

I'm sorry. I'm just playing in, playing in German. Remember the bill when they had credit. Played in German. That's it, that's it. Just picture the peg box. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da I watch it. Gorgeous, folly work there. Thanks Robert, the windmill.

Gaffle hangin'. Gaffle hangin'. How's your gaffle hangin'? I'm so sorry. Can I talk? I'm sorry. Yes. Stop.

By the way, and not the first of things that you said today. Or something for that matter. Why is it offensive? It's not really offensive, we're just having a bit of a juggle. I'll never be one of the lads. Gathallhangen, German. It's a German sport this time. Okay.

And it is a test of young women And how long they can hold their breath underwater it stems from Stems from now. We're thinking stems from witch hunts That's a way what actually what I was thinking You have such cleaner minds than I thought Okay, and then the third version Actually what I was thinking was that. You have such cleaner minds than I thought. Okay, and then the third version.

You old your breath underwater. That's actually round two. We're back in Holland. How would they be timing that when they were hunting the witches? How long have they used a stopwatch before they used her, I guess, moral fort right? Um... We're back in the Netherlands. Thank God. Um, I'm nothing to do with hills, I'm sorry, I'd be thrilled.

It's not about trying to please me. I mean, I think that's been clear from the start. LAUGHTER I'm missing the repair shop. You want to call it on the audio version, but now Harry knows how time is measured. Gaffle hanging. It's um, you hang off of your... Gaffle? No?

I really have some pitch fork. Oh. Pitch fork, because we're in which direction? Yeah, yeah, okay. And then you, um, you have to do it for longer than the other guy. You have to pitch fork for longer than the other guy. You have to hang off your pitch fork for longer than the other guy. It's the Netherlands, they don't have anywhere to climb,

so they just have to stick something in a wall. So is it indoor climbing? Is it hot back to the days of the German witch hunts? Or is it hanging off a pitch fork? Harry, Tom, what do you, I was going to say what you're thinking, not what you're thinking. Which, keep that to yourself. You sort of basically know what you're thinking. Which of those would you consider to be the correct answer? Well, I'm going to say, the sounds like a German word, was it Hangen?

Gaffel, Gaffel Hangen. Gaffel hangen. It reminds me a bit of Taffel's spits. I don't know if you know that the Viennese detective. I love that guy. Do you think it sounds German so you think it's Viennese? Well, you're very closely related. It's a piece of a beef brisket that is boiled. And then they just pay

I see your three definitions and I raise you How come no one's writing this down It's a piece of brisket that they they braise, I think, eight hours or something, and then they chill it very quickly. And then they slice, take the slices of it, and that's... Are you about to come here women to get it? Sorry. And that's served in a beef broth. Sounds delicious.

What was the name of that again? Taffel Spitz. Taffel Spitz. Taffel Spitz. Taffel Spitz, thank you. It sounds German and to me it sounds like... Is it me? Is it my turn? No, it is your turn. It is your turn, yeah. It's just seemed like everyone had tuned out.

And... And straight... I mean, the pitchfork thing, it's not clear where... Is it the sound they got rid of you've been framed? Yeah. They're telling you the... You know said they got rid of you being framed. Yeah. They're telling you the truth. You know, they got rid of you being framed three years ago. It's just taken three years for anyone to notice.

LAUGHTER Three years ago. Yeah. 15 years I had a free money. LAUGHTER Oh, it's an old lady. Oh, waiting. She's falling over.

We can see her nickers. See you after the break. LAUGHTER APPLAUSE It's a boy with a tray of hot drinks. He hasn't seen the patio door. No, he's got third-degree burns. He's in hospital.

On a ventilator. Anyway. Erm... LAUGHTER Fans are watching on telly, even better live. Anyway, um, fans of Watch On Telling Even Better Live. It's just to be clear with this podcast, you make the money on the live show, right? So it's not clear to me where the pitch fork, how that's embedded in anything that you could swing off or hold on to. And that's why it's such a difficult spot. Who's side of you on here?

Yours. Are you leaning towards holding the breath under water? Is that what you're saying? Yes. That's where I'm trying to, a lovely roundabout way. I'm saying. I thought we had to sort of unp-pick them a bit first, entertainment purposes. Little glimpse behind the curtain there. Little glimpse of magic What happens? LAUGHTER I can't remember the other one, what?

Speed climbing. Oh yeah. In the Netherlands. Holding your breath underwater. Or pitchfork climbing. Which one do you think it is? You think underwater? I do, yeah.

I think pitchfork hanging. Okay. I'm happy to go. Roll over. I have to roll over. Which one are you going to go for, guys? Come on, come on, come on. Let's go with pitch for hanging. Okay.

All right. Captain Bo Hart, tell us please, gaffel hangin'. What is that sport? Played in a small region of the Netherlands. Oh no. The object is to hang off your pitch for... Oh my goodness! Oh my goodness! The points go to Tom and Harry. But mostly Tom.

Oh, he is well-planned. You're good! You're good! Thank you. Was it? You got it. He got it. All right, Harry. Your sport is Seppack Tacros. Seppack Tacros. In a moment, he got it, all right, Harry. Your sport is Sepak Takraw. Sepak Takraw.

In a moment, you give us three definitions for Catherine Ben, which one is the real Sepak Takraw? I think out loud is... Yes, so, I mean, it's a little indoor game that children play, set back tack raw. And it's literally, they have a handful of small nails or if you like tax and And they have to separate them and And over the years that's become Sepac Tacquerel Wait till which countries is it Singapore

They say tack for the they say tack for Ryan's with Singapore it's it's a pack tack wrong it's rhyming slang for Singapore what are they what are they dividing them into they have to they have to separate them into similar looking tacks no I mean there are this. This is clearly an audience who have never really studied tax in any detail, but they all have my... You can have the gold metal ones you can have the red... In Brass bag. ...and, yeah, you can just wrap them. Yeah.

They made the red, green and white ones, you know, those guys? Yeah, it was a tax. Traditionally, the elder of the tribe would... ...tribes. Yeah, I have tribes I said nothing of the Jamaican accent but tribe I'm gonna have to call they would you know it would be the tax that were in the house essentially and so you know they would be but but also someone you know if you get really good at it you would just have a whole load of the same tack and you would have to

spot the miniature the tiny the tiny differences that are created in the tack making process. Imagine if it was this one. That's your first definition, Harry, the second definition, please of Sepak Takraw. Yes, so this is a new might know this, Catherine. Maybe? Because I think I'm not a detective. Sepak Takross. So this is a Croatian... Croatian sport. Where you have two people, but basically you have two people in a boat across the pond and one throws a ball. Oh, my last of my own heart. You've got a basically just got to try and knock the other bloke out of his boat with your ball.

You have a Sepak Tack Raw. Okay, Croatian sport. You're unpacked that a bit. For entertainment purposes. No, we'll leave that one, that's the right one. And the third definition of sepac tachyros, please. The third one is... This is sepac tachyros, it's from Kuala Lumpur. And it's a cross between, in a way, it's a cross between netball and football.

How so? How so? When a sepac is netball. Take cross the other one. It's a rat-hand ball, you know, with a big on rat-hand over there. Yeah, everything's rat-hand, chairs, tables, everything. Do I have a rat-hand in the kitchen? Yeah. What are they going to do?

Come on. Come on, come on, come on, take about. Because we're all over you before. And they have to get, they're only allowed to use their, I think it's probably, you know, they're allowed to use their chip. They're not allowed to use their hands or feet, think probably. So they're just there. I can tell they've been flipped over. They're not allowed to use their feet.

They're not allowed to use their feet. So they can use their... They're allowed to use their feet. They're not allowed to use their hands. They're not allowed to use their hands. They can use their chest. They can use their... hands. So, not not to use the hands, they can use their chest, they can use their... Not that naughty.

Not that naughty. Yeah. What's the story? So, football. I never saw anyone play football with a rat-ten ball to do... Never in my life ever. From the ones I was in Kuala Lumpur. Yeah.

Well, that was on football, was it? It was jetpack, right? So far. Me and a couple of Polish blokes on holiday, it was funny. So you've got your three definitions there, and it was so long ago the first one we've been talking about. Yeah, I got a remember. I got no idea.

But which one of those is, do you want to make notes? The tax. We've got separation tax. Separating the tax. Separating the tax. Separating the tax. We've got the boats.

The boats throwing up one to the boat and knocking the boat out. And we've got the Ratan ball. Singapore, Croatia, Kuala Lumpur. Yeah. What a tour. Everyone's talking about setback tag roll. LAUGHTER APPLAUSE

I surprised myself there. LAUGHTER I don't think I've ever been on such good form. LAUGHTER What a waste. LAUGHTER Waste. LAUGHTER What a waste. What a waste. What a waste. What a waste. It's like a tree falling at the forest and no one's around.

Perth to swine. Perth to swine. Okay. Which one of those folks? Which one of those do you think is the correct tepac sacra? Well, I will say that. I will say that. I will say this. I think it's definitely not one or three.

Me too. Me too. I don't think a tribal leader decides which the categorisations of tax are. For children, I don't think... Oh, dear you. Yeah. I know. I'm crazy. I don't think I don't think I think it's got to be It's got to be true. There was a little investment in two that I had to have been just written on the page Harry What what are the actual rules of sepac tachyros well it allowed me to tell you sepppack Takeroy's developing Kuala Lumpur. No! No! Sabak Takla!

Across between football and netball in involves players using only... Using only their feet, knees, shoulders and chest and head to propel a rat and ball over it. You're the winner. Barley and me. Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! He's never been better. He's never been better! Oh He's never been better. He's never been better Can I phone my mum can I phone my mom Is somebody filming this that's good shit The the final sport is for Ben and it is of course Buzz Kashi. No, it's not Clarky's favourite surgeon, Pawn Hub. It's a sport! But what's Clarky?

But not. But what's thought of sport is Buzz Kashi. Buzz Kashi. Harry and Tom, that is up to you. Let's hear three definitions from Clarky about Buzz Carshie. Well, this is a game that they play in Turkmenistan. And it involves a large dirt ring. Come on, mate. You're better than that. Come on, mate. involves a large dirt ring.

Come on mate. You're better than that. Come on mate, yeah. Please, please keep going. And hurry, hurry. They have two people in a car, multiple cars, and they race around the ring, and the person who's not driving leans out and has a long stick with a spike on the end and tries to pop the tires of the opponent's car. I'd pay to see that, sounds great.

Me too! Dudley Car Park on a Saturday night. What's that old sport these two on horses would they do in a night's tale? Oh like joustic. Yeah, it's like that but like good. Yeah Jasting it's a doing you say it's a dirt ring It's an enclosed ring or it's just a circle on the on a dirty He's lost it. He's lost it. He was there. I mean it was there a minute ago It's gonna bike. Let's go right. He was coming. I'll get it back. I'll get it back Who's there? It was all there! It was Lucy!

I'll get it back! I'm cocky! Can someone call me ambulance? Cocky! The second definition please. Buzz Cache. Buzz Cache, of course. We've all got a Buzz Cache, I think. It is played in Afghanistan and it's on the horseback.

And that's not because you just mentioned being on horseback and it's not because it's a bit like a car. Nature's horseback, nice just car. Can someone call an ambulance please? No you're right, cars are nature's horseback, you're going, you're right. Car is our nature's horse. Back you go, and you're OK. Well, you're doing very well. We refer to the power of a car's horse power, in fact.

Really? Everybody's on car key side right now. Thank you. Thank you, guys. It's good to be over. We're going to be over. And two teams have to race to score a goal, but here's the thing. There's the thing.

There in cars. It's not. The horse was driving the car. Horse is in cars. I'd pay to see it. Who from the gear stick? Yeah. That's when they put it.

Yeah. Yeah. There'll be automatic cars, obviously. Sorry, I'm sorry. I told you I'd get it back. You're not, and then Harry throw you, you can do it. And they're on horseback, and there's two teams. Oh, yeah, yeah.

So, they're not playing with a ball. Yeah, so, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Third one please. Can you stop hitting that weed vape? And the third one is actually played in Bahrain and it is a three day long dance and the last person to still be dancing wins a goat. Yep. Okay, so we've got Turkmenistan and it's sort of jasting in cars. We've got Afghanistan and it is jasting with goats. And the third one, Jiving for Goats. Great man. Great man.

They're here tonight for Union's home. Driving for Goats. Good to see you back. Good to see you back, boys. It's a never-fall amount. There we go. So what are you thinking? I think it's number two. I think it's going to be a game that's... What was that one?

The horses shepherding a goat into the goal. Oh wait, the goat's dead. Yeah, I don't know. Any more rules you want to throw in now? Bring it on. No shepherding. I think it's the third one. If you just made that part up, that's really dark, man.

I hope the goat's dead. Go on, sorry. Bring it on. No, Sheparding. I think it's the third one. If you just made that part up, that's really dark man. I hope the goats dead. Go on, sorry. You think it's the third one, which is dancing till... Dancing till you drop, basically, in the last one. And I think you've got the goat, the winning the goat thing from the... You've got the... And you've got the goat in the second one from the correct answer, which is the third one. Right, okay, so you think the goat... You read the... You read the third... I don't know, I don't know. I think you got the goat from the third one, from the second one.

And he got the car from Pakashi for the first one. Okay, but I think... Come on, detective. You know... Get those clogs up. You need to solve this case. Get off the horse. Let me just put it in neutral. I think you know his body language. I mean, I've never even set eyes on him before.

Not many people have. Because you lent me, you lent into me when he was doing the second one, and you said, and you said, he was an episode of the porridge reboot. So the boy can act. Yeah, remember me shortly. We're going to go number two. You're going to go number two? Oh, yeah.

Once again. I'll let you. Harry. Oh, you go with your guts. Ben Clark, tell us the correct rules please. Bikashi, the national sport of Afghanistan in which players on the horseback tend to a place called Carcus into the go. Congratulations, well done, well played everybody. Now, let's not forget the real sport we're playing the noble game of flat-share slandered producer Gwyn.

Please tell us what the scores are now. It's a white wash so far. It's Ben and Catherine were zero, and Tom and Harry were eight. Oh! Oh, my. That completely checks, though. That's like, you should not be on the Mollyshark. That does check it.

No, like, do you think you won there? No, no, no. But he thought it was close, he was apparently with that. You know what, it's everything to play for in part two, or let everyone decompress. So Tom and Harry, the ball is in your court, but Ben and Catherine, will they be putting it back over the fence? We'll find out in part two, see you in a bit.

Oh! All right, folks, welcome back to Black Death Standdown! Here we go! Now we mentioned lock. Here we go, now before the break, Tom and Harry were in the lead, the scores haven't moved and neither has neither that ball gathering moss in our back garden or the knock-nosed oaks calling for me to throw it back. Whoa. That's it. And it was a bad idea by the house next to the England Training Ground.

Sorry Harry Kane can't chat now, we've got to play round two, it's flat games! Yeah! Let's play forever, rock the dice, go and play, put that down. Close your toll, games. If you lose, you get nothing. Games. If you win, you get gold. Gold, gold, gold. Listen to that. Oh, yes.

That's the sign of the Grassroots movement. Yes. Grassroots means the main job casting is that you rock and roll! Oh! It's the old rock and roll, well looks at it. Ha! I knew having a break was a good idea. Listen to the noise they're making, they're back on board. They've had a chat, they've worked their one and watching.

This week we are playing our version of Kaplunk, which we're calling Car Punk. I'm going to ask, our horse is driving those cars. Well, you've got to be automatic. I'm going to ask our horses driving those cars. Well, you've got to be automatic. I'm going to ask each player to sing about a famous car to the tune of a classic punk hit. What's wrong?

I've got a surprise. You've got to listen to your song. You said to do it at the break. I did, but I did. We were having a chat about what it's going to all the way. You're going to hurry at the break. We were having a chat about what it's going to be. You were talking to Harry. Okay. Yeah.

Could I go in the corner? Do you want to go in the corner? We have another short break. Quite a short break, two and a half minutes. About the song Teenage Kicks. How Teenage Kicks are saying teenage kicks you're saying to me? Yeah, do you want to... Should we just play it?

We'll do it. We'll jump, Peel it. We'll just play it twice. That's a great reference to the age of our audience isn't it? Yeah. One for all the six music guys. Did you get it? I don't know the song. You got it there? Okay. Do you want it on the loudspeaker? This is a new live even for us.

We've been pretty sure in the past, but this. That's the new live. He's got the PA system there. Have you got the original there? We can't do a jump here. Can you do a jump here? No. You've not got the original.? Please listen, here we go. I can't do a jump here. Can you do a jump here? No. You've not got the original. Let's hear our version. We'll see.

You can't join in. OK, here we go. Let's listen now to Jane Age Kicks. Oh my god, it's like he never dies. Are you, you're going to sing it, right? OK, here we go. You all got it. Three, go.

A D-Day fix, so hard to beat. What? Every time you walk down the street. Are you kidding me? Another girl in my neighborhood. How old are you? I'm just the man. She looks so good.

I'm so... I wanna hold her, I wanna hold her tight. Three D-Day fix, right through the night car. So good! So good! I wanna hold on, I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't

I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't

I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't I wanna hold on, don't Now that you come out, you blackened it. LAUGHTER I do have that.

Different podcasts, very different podcasts. Weirdly, the least offensive thing that's happened tonight. What the? I know. It's weird that what it happens. Everybody knows it's something you've got no clue about it. So that's like a song, do you? We're not pranking you.

Well, I said who was here last night? I wasn't saying who was here last night to learn teenage kids. So the way Captain Bowie shows up, it's going to blow her mind. I think it came out. Let's do another song together. Let's see the national anthem for the Irish version. I feel like you just did. Wow.

Yeah. Ah, straight people. Oh, man. Someone just said, yeah, that's the reason, but come on. It's interesting to consider that the lead singer of that, all this time later, has developed an interest in the purity of chalk water streams. LAUGHTER I don't get it.

It's just a fact. LAUGHTER I can only imagine what it must be like to be in your brain right now. It's not me. I'm so sorry. Okay, I'm going to anyway. Don't worry. We're going to hear from Tom first of all, but just to recap you on the rules, I'm going to ask each player to sing about a famous car to the tune of a classic punk here. You know one that we all know.

I'm so sorry. Wait, a famous car? A famous car. Don't, don't get it started that way. Oh, sorry. Surely. What's up, old love? You've heard of famous cars. Four wheels are steering wheel, that kind of stuff.

They're like a new horse. I'm learning to drive. I just told you. Oh my god, okay. Okay, so it's one point to the teammate for correctly guessing the famous car, Catherine, it's going to be okay. Please, you're making me nervous now. But up to ten points for performance

Whoa, so um That's a lot of points A lot of points You kidding me? So what big ten point ten? Whoa, yeah So so players are going to ask you to take these a funky town Tom you're going to kick us off with the quintessential punk anthem Oh, can I not go for a song before I forget the tune of the...

You want to go... You want to... Yes! This is fair. This is... You want to go first. I'm sorry, it's just the end. You've got to go first. Are there any of the punk themes that make you feel... Well, I could show you the other songs, but I feel like it's... Please, Matthew, let's do this.

Let's do this. Let's do this. Okay. Thank you. There you go. That's your, Catherine, you're going first. That is your famous car. Now, for you, we picked the undertone's teenage kicks, you know? LAUGHTER I look the whole time you've been talking to me like, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, Duh, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, Who will I see they're just kicking? Ben, what car is Catherine singing about to the tune of the undertones? Well, we'll see about that. Tierskicks.

Whilst the undertones kicks, Tierskicks plays behind. OK, here we go. DJ Gwynn, will you play? Oh, yeah. It's my turn. It's my turn. It's my turn. It's my turn.

It's my turn. It's my turn. He's called Scrums, but he's got no skills. Yes, girl. He likes Robin and Catwoman. He's a hero, but he's also rich. What's the truth? He's, um, it's a pretty good car.

Looks like formula, looks like a formula one car, but it's by a rich guy and he's kind of a jerk, but we're not sure about him because he feels like he's, uh, do you, have you got nothing for me? I know, I know. I love that. Yeah. Catherine Boe, everybody.

Oh, yeah. Oh. And now in true John Peel style, let's hear it again. I don't like it here. I, Helen Bauer was here and she was like, they're nice boys boys and I was like, I don't know if that's true or possible. I don't think they are. We are nice, we are nice boys. I don't like you.

Clarke, Clarke, earn your team the first point of the show. Don't fuck this up, man. And tell us what famous car was Catherine Bohar singing about? It's a shock even knew what it was. Is it the Batmobile? Yes! It's the Batmobile! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

But, as I said, there were 10 points for performance, of course. 10 points for performance. Oh, for a part. So, but now, you know what, for somebody who had never heard that song until two minutes before... Or has she seen Batman? Well, let's don't worry about the Batman aspects of it. Right now, you've got that point, that's safe.

We're not taking that one away from you. The performance is what we're talking about here. I'm gonna give you, I'm gonna give you eight out of ten. Eight out of ten. Oh! The captain. Go, boys. The Interpol.

Tom. Here you go. Now you are gonna be singing, you're going to be kicking us off. We're not kicking us off, that's what it says here, but of course it's not kicking us off. Continuing to kick. Dribbling it forward. Middle-aged kicks. Now you're going to be... You're gonna be singing Anarchy in the UK about a famous car. How does that one go? Oh, well I'll tell you what.

I'm believe we've got John Knight in here tonight. So, you'll hear this one in a second. You'll hear this one in a second. You can't teach you every song you have. Wait, I don't think the same age. That's not how that discussion went. No, Mike. We're absolutely not, we're all old men. 41. And you guys? 43. I'm 27. But it's been very tough. A bit of tough life. Hell of a paper round. We're not that far away. Well, I'm 50 fucking eight.

But I'm 34. We're in the same wheelhouse. No, we're not there. No, no, no, no, no. I mean, thank you, but no. Yeah. Bloody Gen Z. No, I'm a...

I know. Listen, I'm it. I know. Listen, I know. Listen, Tom. I wish. Tom, Anarchy in the UK, we've got DJ Gwini Rotten on the decks. Let's hear it. What famous car Harry is Tom singing about? I am a flying car! I will go in the sky! I will fly right home and repond the person who thought of me thought of James Bond

because I was to be cheating Hey the sex press does didn't stick to the rules man. Oh My goodness That was fantastic stuff there from Tom Tom and unbelievably Tom has never heard that song before Well, wait, you're just like this. You're just allowed to say the quote. No, you're not you're absolutely not Wait, you're just allowed to say the car. No, you're not. You're not. That's punk rock, man.

There's half a point to score here, Harry. If you can complete the name of the car. Would it be O-Chity-U-Chity-Chity-Chity-Chity-Bang-Bang-Bang? I'm going to give you a half a point because I like you. What was the James Bond? They need a leg up at this point, don't they? What was the James Bond, did you say James? Yeah.

What was the reference? I think in Fleming wrote it. Oh, he was written by In Fleming, I've heard it. Don't back down there, you know that fact. Don't be like, I think maybe it's like you fucking way, you're not in your backpack. Tom, so of course you've got the half a point for getting Chichichity Bang Bang, but how

many points are going to give to Tom? I think it's got to be 9 out of 10 points! 10 points! Now, DJ Gwini Rotten, how can we mix things up? Let's ditch Car Punk for Car Funk, Harry. You're up next. I'd like to give you your best James Brown, I got you, about this famous automobile. Tom, all you've got to do is name the car. DJ Quinn, the disco daffodil, will you play? Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, look to it. I'm going to even look to it. OK, well, look at it first, yeah, yeah. That's crucial. It's a very short intro on this, Harry. It's a very short intro as well. Which I'd like to hear that all some first. LAUGHTER It's always on the... It's always very short intro on this Harry. It's a very short intro as well. Which I'd say it all song first. It's always an option.

It's always an option. I'm interested to hear it. If you've got music before. I like sad lesbians on guitar. I don't know what are you, the screaming is. Sad lesbians on guitar. They're here tonight. Great band.

Great band. Great band. Hey girl. I're here tonight. Ray band. Ray band. Hey girl. I love you guys. Hey girl. You have sort of dressed as one for event, which is how you. Lovely shackish. Right.

Here we go. So what car, Tom Pary? What car is Harry Hill singing about to the tune of I Got You by James Brown? You might want to watch Quinn. My doors go up, and then they go down. I travel through time, and then I come back to the present. I'm owned by a doc, and bloke who's Michael J. Fox. If you look like the car, it's not for sale. It was created in Belfast. Well... So, Joel Mann with wire here, his name escapes me.

Facts and sadly they went bankrupt. Not the whole song, surely. Harry, here everybody at the end of the show. APPLAUSE The other end of the show. I had heard it. Yeah, it's all right. It's a good song. You should have done that one really bad.

It's just too complicated that stays to change it up anymore. Beautiful. So, a beautiful song, but Tom, what car was Harry singing about? Was it the delorean out of back to the future? It absolutely was. Wow. Yeah, well, very much. And for us. For performance, I think it's gonna have to be we're gonna have to go

I'm gonna go for a whopping eight and a half eight and a half points for four months. There we go the audience wanted more the audience wanted more for that by which you mean you You're still in the leader, right? Finally Ben your your song, my friend, is Super Stition by the legend Stevie Wonder. Now I'm going to need a lot of context clues because I don't know the song and I won't know the car. You'll know this song, I actually can't guarantee that. So Clarky. But I can't know the car so you've got a really late car.

OK, Clarky's going to sing about a famous car. He stood up. I didn't know you were a last stand. Oh, he's standing up for the song. Would that change anything if you were going to sit up for the last song? Can I just point out I've never actually seen the film

back to the future. You did very, very well. So, yeah, yeah. That's why I based it mainly about the delorean and manufacturing process. Yes. The bell-fars-based factory. Yeah.

I'm curious to think, actually, the bloat that played. Don't bitch, dude. Oh, I mean, it's just a fact, guys. It's just a fact, fact. I mean, you can even think like bimbo clues, like, don't bitch clues. Okay? Okay. I want like acting out the...

You got this. Alright. Think you articulate rather than you got it. Yeah, Clarke's got it, you've got it. I've got... I feel as tremendous confidence for you. Superstition, Catherine, name the car, Clarke, sing the song. Let's hear it. Mmm.

Oh. Mmm. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, you're going to prove you know the answer. Let's start it again. Come on, let's do it.

No, it's in. Yeah. No, it's in. He just doesn't want to win this game. You asked me to act it out for you. It's good, actually. It was good. It was good. If you know the answer, then well you know the answer. It's good actually. Let's have some words for people who are listening to the podcast at home, Clarky. Let's have some words. Fathersly and audio medium.

They can enjoy it. And for the person who doesn't know the car, who leads to guess. Okay, yeah. Here we go. You fell down. DJ Gwyn. Hiddick. Okay, yeah, here we go. You fell down. DJ Quinn, hit it. It's a lot. It's a lot.

Is the car sexy or is the song sexy? The song's very sexy. The car, well, just keep an eye on that chandelier. I actually hurt my hip then. When I hit the floor. Woo! But this is from an old sitcom. Okay.

You probably never heard of before. It is just two old guys. Never heard of before. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha feel and if you believe that the bus there and you try to lead on it but it isn't the floor's the only way Oh, yeah, fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. So, yeah, so it turns out the falling over was a huge clue. Okay, can I say, first of all, if you don't get 10 points for performance, you're high. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Second of all, I do think I know the sickle.

Yeah? I'm scared to say he's so wrong. No, no, no, no. Go for it. Trust your instincts. I don't know the car, so that's tricky. Well, I'll tell you what, say the car from, and then say the name of the sickle. Yeah.

And we'll give you the points. What did Miranda draw? She didn't drive, she launched. I think that was it. And it was a good listen. Shout out to Miranda. I think it's the car from, and I haven't watched it. You're right, because it was treasonous to watch British television and where I'm from. Is it the car from Ali Files and Horses? It is indeed. Listen to that. It is of course Del Boy and Rodney's were like Robin from Trotter's Independent Traitors.

It is of course correct. One point there. And you know what? What the fuck? Because it was fantastic. Eleven. Eleven fantastic 11 is going all the way to 11 so DJ guinea rotten give us the scores you know what it's got to be to Teenage Kick give us the score to Teenage Kick let's hear it the score isn't it? I'm gonna get it this time. Yeah, there we go Ben and Catherine have 21. Tom and Harry have 27.

Oh! OK, OK. Do you know what? Let's hear it again. LAUGHTER John Peele. LAUGHTER You can see why you did it. It's infectious, man.

OK, we've got to move on to the next round. Who is in the move for some taffled spit? I certainly am its beef brothers. You've got a problem, not calling a problem. You've got a problem, calling a beef. If you're going to beef, maybe we can help you. Be from the Sony making beef. Yes, indeed. His beef brothers were each week we asked our panelists to sort out a flat shared based beef and today's one comes from our dear friend Henry who was in the audience My Henry hello hello, mate. So he's

He's gonna be well. Let's let's find out what his problem is He says my eldest son is 13 at a complete bellend. This guy gets it. Stop clapping dad. Isn't he younger than you? He's sporty Popular and has already had two girlfriends. Oh my god. He's two of the spice girls I get it I get it

If you wait long enough there's's something for everyone. That's our tagline. He's 40-pop, and it only had two girlfriends. He's like an anti-Henry. Right, Henry here. That's not my editorial. So Tom and Harry, you are on Henry's side, Ben and Catherine, you are on the side of the Bellend. But before all of that, let's have a cross examination.

Does anyone from either side have any questions for our dear friend Henry who sat in the audience over there? Yeah. Yes, Catherine. What's wrong with you? LAUGHTER You haven't met him. What's the first of a what's his name? George. Do you have a star sign?

Who's that? I imagine so. I'm not sure it's relevant, no? Okay, thank you. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm to bring into the world, has a nice life, is it? Oh no, it's the sort of person I've normally crossed the road to avoid. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, I'm so sorry, I knocked my wine on you, it's just this man who's so deep, Give me that happy part. Is your kid, is your kid married, he has not British and you are.

What's happening? Sorry for saying my wife and you. Henry, can I ask you, is your partner sporty? Uh, yes, she is. Yeah. Are you still with your partner? Yes, I am, yeah, yeah. Surprising.

She's, um, she's not a fan of this podcast, but we're right, so far. Oh, she won. Are you confident that the child is yours? LAUGHTER I've... I've spent quite a lot of time away from home, Harry, so for Monest, you know. Ah! You spent quite a lot of time away from home. Did you say yes? Okay, Ferris?

So there's plenty of opportunity Okay, well you need is one hair. That's all you need from her head Hairbrush get us get some hair. That's Harry loads of times He did have my eyes That paper boy did have my eyes. That paper boy did have my eyes. He's doing the eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye eye Come on, if you're not enjoying that, then what are you doing here? Mine's not, were you hoping your son would be just like you? Well, my youngest is just like me and it turns out that's equally annoying as well. No, that I believe. Did you teach him any of the sports that he's good at? Oh, no, absolutely not.

No. Did you get him any the sports that he's good at? Unabsolutely not. No. Did you get many of his girlfriends? What? No, he just said he was an absent-folder, so we just created the scenario. But you're quite right. I mean, the point of reproduction is to reproduce yourself. In fact, that's just a fact. That's why I'll be having babies with my wife. Otherwise what's the point? So true. Ideally you'd produce two versions of yourself.

So then it's one up on the number of yourself that was here when you arrived. If you have to and I feel like we are going to have to push you here, Henry. What are two nice qualities about this one? He's sporty, he's popular. No, no, Henry. Henry, you admire. Once you can say without spitting, please, nice qualities about this boy that you've raised. Two nice qualities he's fostered despite a father who hates him.

Two nice things about this child in your home. You make a great therapist. Two good qualities about just a kid meant to survive a hostile living environment. He's generally out of the house between sort of nine and four more days. Do you know what Henry has got an amazing delivery? It puts me in mind of the late lamented John Peale. You couldn't say about his chance and now here's Teenage Kicks. And now we're in the room. Here's Teenage Kicks by the undertone. Beautiful.

Totally beautiful. Yeah. What do you do, Henry? I'm in the Air Force. Oh, no one expected that. Oh, a military man who hates a joke. What the fuck? Do you mean you kind of oil the wheels and the adjust the knobs in the planes rather than fly them?

Yeah, I'm going to get too technical, Harry, but that's about right, yeah. LAUGHTER So few words and such a dressing down. How does he do it? He's an in top gunner, you're one of the guys that goes. LAUGHTER Just points. Yeah. Are you a pointer? No, that's American.

Withering. We're again. Three words and an absolute dick slap. So hopefully, don't call him that. Hopefully, that is enough information to make our cases. We've got a pretty good measure of exactly why his sons turned out the way he has. So without further ado, I call upon Harry Hill to begin the case for the prosecution.

You have a minute to begin your case, please, to put forward why you believe that, of course, Henry is in the right. Your time starts now. Well, I think that... LAUGHTER Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, if you're on the...

when you're on the air base and you need... I don't know, I mean, I've got... Sorry. That's all right. I mean... Could he... Maybe he could go first and I can nick some ideas off him. Oh! We could do that, if you like. But I don't know how many ideas you'll nick off him.

We could do that. In fact, I tell you what, we could do it that way around and see. I'm happy to do that. Yeah? Okay. So Tom, when I do this round. Well, I don't do it as myself. Well, I was going to ask that question, Tom, are you going to do it as you tell me? No, I do it in the style, I don't do it as myself. Well, I was going to ask that question top. Are you going to do it as you thought?

No, I do it in the style of a John Grisham defence lawyer. All right. Called Mr. Fanshore Standard. Fanshore Standard, presiding and providing Tom. I've been fanshore indeed. Of course, are you, you have a minute to begin the case for the prosecution? Rarely see you this early.

Go to the bank. Ladies and gentlemen of the Jewry. Ella, recognise some of your faces from the village square. See Thomas there from the library, I'll bring the book back tomorrow. I nearly coloured it all in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Around here we simple folk, we don't know any of them big words that dim their lawyers from the city are about to use. I would imagine.

Brown here, we simple folk, we mamas and poppers, we family people. Listen to the young Henry Overdeer, probably reminded you of the story of John Paul the Baton. He grew up just two towns away. Y'all remember the story of John Paul the cause of the day, he bought that little puppy dog home with him, hell. Ain't never seen a puppy dog so cute. Give it a lick, cherry pie. Yeah, John Paul and that puppy are inseparable. Y'all remember what happened though?

Two months later, he came home. Little puppy dog had set the table. Little knife or fork. Little plates plates, tiny little teacup. John Paul ain't never seen no puppy lay the table before. John Paul had a choice that day, saying that puppy down the well like so many before it. Or sit down opposite that puppy and break bread. John Paul still claims it was the best meal he ever had. Defense rest rest show on

Oh That sort of thing. Sorry Fantastic from fanshorts down in there. I think the question we all want to know is Harry. Did that give you any ideas? It's that sort of thing really That sort of thing no need to worry because we're gonna throw over of course now to the to the That's that sort of thing. No need to worry because we're going to throw it over of course now to the opposing team. To Catherine.

To Catherine, you've got a minute to begin the course. Do I have a minute? Is that what he just said? Yeah, yeah, you've got to take this long as you were. I have a question. Yes, of course. Do you still have that mic over there, Henry? I do, yes. Can I ask one more question in my ear?

Oh, it's great. Wonderful. I'm coming to see you, Henry. Oh. She's got a knife Lovely My time's starting now you time it's not now lovely hello Henry How are you my love you're good?

Excellent now you're gonna keep your arms crossed the whole time I bet you are, yeah. Here's my question, Henry. Was your dad not very nice to you? Oh, objection, Your Honor. He was emotionally distant. No way. So English and did you have a brother, Henry?

No, two sisters. Two sisters. Two sisters? Okay, so all the pressure was on you, was it? No, it was on them. Oh, he preferred the girls. Interesting. It's anybody else, fucking ten. Henry, if you could, is your dad with us now? 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. 10. I was going to say he sounds like hell. Here's my question Henry, if you were here, what would you say to your dad?

Er, hi dad. Lovely, go on. You can have it all right. Gorgeous. Cool. So, uh... Tell your dad what you need from a Henry. Well, another phone call about six months would be fine. That's a good thing.

Yes. Henry, I'm sorry that happened my love. What's your son's name? George. George, okay, it's not an invented one. That's all right. Henry sent it my love, because obviously you can't show yours. Nice to meet you.

Good luck. Wow. Catherine, go ahead, everybody. A little glimpse there of Catherine's tour show. Nice to meet you. Good luck. Catherine Bowen, hi everybody. A little glimpse there of Catherine's tour show. Oh, look, you're very hard on each other, Englishmen. What I would say is... Oh, you're OK. Yeah, absolutely. I'm not doing anything now.

No, I'm just... I just don't you feel sorry? I think he can do it. I feel sad now, you're after that. Yeah. Up to that point, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm happy to rest. Not really. Not... Nobody will ask at this stage how you think it's going so far. I'm not going to ask you that. LAUGHTER I'm just going to move back. We're going to ask your daddies here tonight. Please welcome all the way from Newtomabit. BU-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B Close? Not really. No, I can't throw it up. Can we get you close on that? Okay Harry. There's a warmth to the man. A warmth to the man.

Harry, you now have a minute to conclude the case. To conclude the case, for the prosecution, your minute begins now. Well you're quite wrong to say this is, that he does not love this boy what he is doing is from love it is it is born of love because this this young boy is popular sporty has had by all the counts numerous girlfriends he's popular now but how long will this last? We all know where these things lead. Sport, we all know. So many sportsmen take drugs. LAUGHTER He may be playing cricket at the weekends now,

but who knows, in a few years' time, he may be turning tricks in pub car park. To get enough money to pay for his next fix of Miami Alps. You can still find it if you look. And these girls, he's on the RAF base, flirting with these various, these wrens. Does it wren? There's other small, small gunbirds, and saw that one coming. And those of course lead to venereal diseases, teenage pregnancies. Before you know this boy is looking at a stretch behind bars. And Henry, all Henry wants is the best for him. He is after all his son. Harry Helen. Clarky, it all comes down to you now. You're going to conclude the course.

Of course. For the defence we've heard many, many... We were telling in raw arguments. Emotion in raw arguments on both sides. Then you have just one minute to conclude the case. Your minute begins now. Yeah. Katherine, just very courageingly whispered to me, you're a boy. You... But you were a boy.

You were a boy. You know what it feels like? Like I've got this. You know what it gets into comedy because their dad loved them, like come on! LAUGHTER LAUGHTER LAUGHTER Lot of break-per-us tonight, lot of break-per-us.

Clarke is just full of beauty emotional about. You can do that. Henry. Henry, beget George, Henry and George, both he was. Was it deliberate? Probably. But you know, I feel for Henry because it's tricky, you know, a 12-year-old's so much different from a 13-year-old. When they turn that corner, I don't know what it is. It's hard to sum up with words, but maybe in a song. Yeah Teenage boys are hard to be

Bush the wedding stage is 10 reasons I need excited. Yeah, he's a dad But let me tell you he's really bad Side those key to age kids I've bumped it up Yeah! I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want to hold you, I want No, obviously I can't make the decision myself. Because I am Henry Sun. Can he tell it to my face, not through my podcast? It's me, little Georgie. You haven't had two girlfriends. Ches is a sport. So now I'm going to call now upon the Phoenix audience

to make the decision for us. So if you think Harry and Fanshaw and therefore Henry is in the right, I would like you to applaud now. Oh, that's a little carry, I'm going to go to the show. But if you think Catherine and Clarky made the best case and George is in the right, I'd like you to applaud now. It's a goddamn landslide, mate. Love wins, love wins. No, they just really hate Henry. APPLAUSE Love wins. Love wins. No, they just really hate Henry.

Henry. That's so good. Correct. Henry, I'd love to know how you feel about the result, but I'd love to know it to the tune-off. LAUGHTER No, it's fine. How do you feel about the results? I'd qualify to know what Catherine's therapy rates are per video.

My god, she's good. That was really good. I can help you. So listen, the little brats are waiting with baited breath for the return of their precious miter. It might have been waiting a bit longer. We still got to listen to the quick far round jingle! The Queen! This is the quick far round.

It's a round it goes really quickly, which is why it's always so amusing that it has long introduction. You are better at cuddle drunk. It has a long introduction When the round is really short And here's the thing About this long introduction I sure do love it I think that it's the finest introduction in podcast land God bless this introduction and all who listen to her

Sometimes I wish I was sat outside on my porch Sip in ice cold beer and listen it once again To the quick five-year-old cowboy We're maladed by my side And I call beer in my hand Or driving in my truck Looking out at the landscape With my truck's big dog red sat

By my side listen to the introduction Thanks man and red singer long too Good boy red I love you A nirstand production makes me proud To play the quickfire round. It makes me proud to be a part of something so long, something so free. I won't give one for free to be the quick far round God bless it God bless us is the quick far round no red red no boy no no get down Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.

Yes, this is the Quick Fire rounds. And as I show, it's all about throwing the ball back. Remember that? I don't remember anything before. You can't remember anything before. I'm going to ask my players to add the name of my favourite ball game, ping pong to all of their answers. So for example, if the answer was flat share slam down, you would answer ping flat share, pong slam down. It's every bit as fun as the game itself.

It's dead of buzzers. I would like to shout out your first name's Ben and Catherine that's here yours. Ben? Catherine? Lovely stuff, Tom and Harry. Tom. Harry. Lovely stuff. Okay. Question number one, what is the name of the competitive karaoke game for PlayStation?

Tom. Tom. Pinging Pong Star. He's correct. What noise does a telephone make? Ben. Ben. Ping Ring Pong Ring. Who is the current monarch of the UK? Harry. Harry. King Ping Charles Pong. You could start with the ping but I'm going to give you the point this time. Catherine. Harry. King, Ping, Charles, Pong. Yes. You could start with the ping, but I'm going to give you the point this time. You used to call me on my cell phone late night when you need my love.

A lyrics from Which Song by Drake? Catherine. Catherine. Ping, Highline, Pong, Blame. It's Hotline, Blame, but I'll give you half a point for it. Hotline Bling. Which spicy poultry dish often served with the blue cheese dip originally in Buffalo, New York?

A bend. Yes, Ping, Ben. Ping, Buffalo, Pong, Wings. Yeah, I would be chicken wings, for sure. I'll give you that. If I was a sculptor, but then again, no. A lyrics which Elton John hit? Tom. Tom.

Ping your pong song. It's correct. In association football. Which incident is a game in Japan? Where there's... In association football, defenders typically fall into four main categories. Centreback, sweeper, fullback and what? Go again. In association football defenders, typically fall into four main categories. Centreback, sweeper, full back and what? Go again. An association football defenders typically fall into four main categories.

Center back, sweeper, full back and what? Ping go keep a ring? It's a ping-wing pong back. WING back. Ping-wing pong back. WING back. Do you remember that? Baby, wing back.

I like it when the beat goes danna danna. Baby, make your booty go danna danna. A lyrics from Which provocative song by Cisco? Ben. Oh, Ben. Ping-thong pong song. It's correct. Yes!

That's a good idea. Not good. Often uttered on seeing an attractive woman. What was the late Leslie Phillips catchphrase? Pong song is correct. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, Swing pong! Harry. Harry. Ping I say pong. I was thinking of a Ping Ting pong Don. Who is the fictional giant guerrilla who first appeared in a movie in 9th? Tom! Tom.

Ping Ting pong Kong. It's correct. Oh, that's a good one. Also known as Table 10, it tennis or whiff whaff. Name this one. Yes. Ping ping pong pong. Ping pong pong.

That's the end of the round. Oh my god. But before we find out the final score is Katherine and Harry. Any fit you would like to plug while you're on the podcast? Not really. No. Yes. I have a podcast. You do. I I have a podcast with Helen Barrow

on which we frequently slide you off. Sorry, it's called trusty hogs. So shadow to the eight women in the room. We'd love to have you. Trusty is in reliable hogs, is in pigs. It's not out of volume or pitched. Any of the men will be able to hear but truly. If your wives are just gabbing and you want them to give them

something to do, then I'd say, I said, trusty hugs. Yeah, I'd love you to listen to that. And thank you. You shouldn't, you won't. I've remembered I do have a podcast. Oh, yeah. Untrusty hugs.

I haven't topped it up for a while, but it's Harry Hills noise. OK. So this is kind of the angiote to podcast. And the most podcast, like this one, where people just talk a lot and have the best time of their lives. And it's fantastically entertaining. LAUGHTER So...

LAUGHTER So Harry Hill's noise is basically, it's half an hour of the sound of an activity, so it's me perhaps typing on my keyboard, or there's one where I was mowing the lawn and doing some gardening. But at some point in half hour I will make one noise. And the idea is that you try to anticipate the noise when it will come and what the noise will be. And after the noise I make no further noises but you're welcome to listen to the rest of the pop So trusty heart right trusty heart is the name of Yeah, trusty, we um we do scream for an hour and fifteen

So one big long noise yeah, it's one big one Thank you. Can I do a plug you of course yeah, yeah, and this is but is, but there's a musical band. Musical band? Yes. Not an elastic band, musical band. Musical band, yeah, yeah. From Belfast, they've got a song. I call the undertones.

This is Teenage Kicks. There I reach. You know, Irish. There are Irish! There are Irish! There are Irish! One more time everyone, let's do it! A teeny kiss, so hard to face! Every time you walk down the street, such a damn! Another girl in the neighborhood! Really?

I thought she was mine, she looks so good I wanna hold her, hold her tight You're a teenage, it's like through the night You're all right All right, thanks You're all of you guys for watching That was a stutter That's a stutter

You can't force my fucking flat chair Let's hear it one more time I'm laughing Like, subscribe, rate and review our podcast We'll just tweet, recommend the podcast Let's hear it one more time! Like, subscribe, rate and review our podcast and we'll just tweet, recommend the podcast to all your friends, so produce a win. We've got to hear it, man. What are the final scores at the end of that round?

Because we do have to wrap this up by 9-30, I promise we'll probably think of it. I promise, both guests will be done by 9-30, 9-45 at the latest. So, I can't do it very quickly. The scores are Ben and Cassie and have 25 and a half but the winners are Tom and Harry with 3-2 So Ben and Capitna throwing the ball back whilst Tom and Harry are throwing back a high ball in the bar with yours truly Thanks to our guests Katherine Bo-Hart and Harry Hill And we'll see you next time on Flash Eslandown Happy is Flash Esland, love each of Matthew Cuppie, Ben Glock and Tom Hover's question list Harry Hill and Captain Bo-Hart Manchester Slamdown! Josh S. Damianne, this is it for you, he's probably a great cast of the internet. Here's your fucking ball back. Cheers everyone!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE What an episode. What an ep. One of the greats. Yeah. You're saying it right now. Stick it straight in the top 10, no ball that. Absolutely.

An instant, instant classic. It'll, it'll hold its own. Yeah. It'll hold its own up there. I'm telling you. But will the Abbey Clock, Olga Cock and John Robbins episode hold its own amongst such esteemed company? You'll have to come along and find out.

25th of April. Coming up, he's all be there, I'll be there to watch. You'll be in the audience, right? This is it. Once you saw the lineup was so strong, you thought I've got to go along to that. Got to, got to see, can't miss that. Oh God, you've got a nipple on.

So, so, Parry, you'll be in the audience. Robbins will be on the stage. Clark and I will obviously be doing our best to have a whole, our level best of things together. Happy Clark and Olga Cox should be brilliant guest. 25th of April, papyscomedy.com forward slash live. And of course, you can go to the Patreon if you want to get discounted tickets for that show. But move fast, as I'm looking, it's Friday when we're recording this, about three or four days before you're hearing it.

And it's on the verge of selling out, you could already sell out by the time you hear this. And in which case, sorry, but these shows come a pace. They come a pace that hard, they fast. Show's come a pace. They fast. Showers come up pace at you fast. And they're going to keep coming up pace, actually. It feels like they're going to keep coming up pace through June as well. Oh, man. Yeah, yeah. You know, it's an asteroid shower of podcasting at the moment.

That's true. We've got one on the 12th of June. We've got one on the 27th of June. Say those days in your diary. I'm saying this more to you and Clarkie. Say those days in your diary so you are not, and I'm saying this more to you and Clarkie, say those dates in your diary so you don't double book yourself. Yeah, big, big, big days, June, and of course, let's not forget June 6th, Clarkie's birthday as well.

So June's gonna be a big month in the Patrick's calendar. Huge month. Huge, huge month. As always, folks, thank you so much for listening and do leave us a review if you can. Leave us a review, rate, subscribe, like, follow all those kind of things and... Praise the pace! Praise the pace! Please do praise the pace and do recommend this to your friends.

If you can't join the Patreon, the best way of supporting the podcast is to tell other people about it. Because we'd love to get more people to listen to this podcast. I think that's everything really. Mmm. We've covered it all. It was all hot. Today's episode was produced by Emma Corsham.

Corsham. Corsham. Cheers. Cheers everyone. Bye! Bye!