Pappy's Flatshare - Slamdown w/ Tessa Coates & Stevie Martin (Heating the Hot Tub) S9E23

Episode Date: September 2, 2019

Neither “Tom!” nor “Ben!” want to heat the hot tub so Matthew says we’re gonna have to have a Flatshare Slamdown!Tessa Coates and Stevie Martin join the teamFeatures: cat fucking, overarm wanking and hot chumba tub wumbaTessa Coates - https://twitter.com/tessacoatesStevie Martin - https://twitter.com/5tevieMPappy’s - https://twitter.com/pappystweetSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatsharePappy’s Flatshare Slamdown features Matthew Crosby, Ben Clark and Tom Parry with special guests Josie Long and Ed Gamble. It was devised by Pappy’s with producer Ben Walker. Big thanks to everyone who came down to see the recording, to Gwyn Rhys Davies for helping out and to the Soho Theatre for having us.Edited by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman plotting her course to freedom at a lot for... It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things. It's like theaters December 15th.

A listener dear over him. How are you, Matthew? Matthew. Matthew, Matthew, past you Ben. I am in your ear dear. Well, well. A musical start as we brace your ear canal for many a time. And we'd like to thank Lin Manuel Miranda for writing that introduction. I don't think he gave it enough time. I think he really just found out in.

For the money we gave him. And we paid him a pretty penny. We expected a bit more than that. I'm a little bit disappointed now. We've hired out that theatre. Because I think this is going to open and close on the same night in the show. Let's keep this preview in the listeners here, can I, I'll... Private. Let's keep it private. Don't tell anyone.

We're probably using Tom. I'm Ben. And I am Lynn, Manuel Miranda. I love going to another year. What a twist. I pull off my wig to reveal pretty much the same hair. So folks, welcome again to another fantastic episode of Pappies Flat Share Slendown. Oh, this was a special one.

This comes from London's glittering West End. It does. London's glittering West End and we were in the Soho Theatre. Soho, soho, soho. And we have... The basement of the Soho Theatre nonetheless. That was a venue. It's not like... Yeah, it's not just good. We had a break into the wine cell. Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho they are the hosts of that. They are also two thirds of the fantastic sketch acts, massive dad. And one day, we hope that two thirds of our sketch team will be invited on their podcasts.

Fingers crossed. Fingers crossed. Who's it going to be? I can't wait to find out. But it's not me. I remember this being a terrifically fun boozy episode. So you might want to drink next to you when you listen to this, listen to it. Pour yourself a lovely drink of earwax.

Oh, yeah. And pop one in your ear for us as well. Pop some, pop some, pop some brandy in your ear, pop some earwax in your goblet. Pop some brandy in your ear, put some Prosecco on your teeth. Yes, see what you're getting to. Oh, I'm just seeing.

I am underneath. LAUGHTER OK, now we have been asked on Twitter to keep the intro to the episodes a little shorter than we do. So apologies. I was going to say in advance, but apologies very much after the fact. That's true. Yeah, a few people have said the intro's getting a bit long. Right, OK, well, we'll work our way. Well, let's get on with the podcast by telling you a few things about our Patreon.

How are you getting? Enjoy the episode, and we'll see you on the other side. Tata for now. Tom Bay! What is it, Matthew? What is it? Baboy! Baboy! Baboy!

Baboy! Well, listen, baboy. You know, we've lived in this flat for a long time. Oh, yes, it is. Carpool even I've just done this before. It's a classic household chore. One of YouTube has got to heat that hot tub. Oh!

Have we not put the hot tub on? For some reason we've been living here since 2011, and none of us have heated the hot tub. Things are looking up for us, and we've got a hot tub, but podcasts are really rolling in! Certainly rolling in! So listen, who's going to do it? Who's going to heat up the podcast at the podcast?

We're all going to heat up the podcast. Let's face it, guys, the atmosphere is not crazy. There's two things that are heating up. One's the podcast, the other one's the hot tub. Let's start with the hot tub, because the podcast is pruned to be a bit of a struggle. Tom, will it be you? Well, it's not going to be me. I once got involved in a French court case involving the lead singer of the band Eels.

I have to stand at the front of court and say, Jacques-Ouz-E. Jacques-Ouz-E. Jacques-oosie! Jacques-oosie! Jacques-oosie! Jacques-oosie, I like it very much. It's not bad at all. It's not bad at all. Ben, what about you?

Is it going to be you even? I'm not going to do it cross-bite. I'm not into any of that fancy shit. Hot tubs entirely unnecessary. All you need to do is lob five alka sets in the bath. You basically have the exact same effect. Or if you want to go healthy, brocker. LAUGHTER

Or if you want to be a YouTuber, Diet Coke and Mentos. LAUGHTER I really want to be a YouTuber, fam. LAUGHTER True story. Well, like... You're both cancelled. LAUGHTER

But there is only one way to settle this. We're going to have to have a... Flash! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Hello! Oh!

Oh! And welcome to Flash! Flash! The panel show that says, Searing here, eating my heart out, waiting, waiting for some love or to call. Doubt about a thousand numbers lately, almost round the phone off the wall, Looking for a heart of baby this evening, I need a heart of baby tonight. Everyone, I want a heart of baby this evening, Gotta have a heart of, gotta have a heart to baby is a seedbin gotta have a heart to have a heart to

Tonight I'm not to land on Matthew crossby Like the Saho theatre and while they're under my roof they'll be following my rules Let's meet my tenants. It is Tom Perry and Benedict car Now obviously he's in the hot dub, takes two, baby. Who, if you brought along to turn up the heat this week, Ben? Oh, I brought along! Oh! Oh!

Oh, I'm not leaving! Ben, you brought along my sister, Steve. You've got to be the Martin is here! Yes! APPLAUSE Steve is Martin. The family resemblance is uncanny. It's absolutely unfrainy.

You look quite similarly, certainly. Sure. I mean, who's that compliment to? Me. Yes. I mean, you both look great. Stevie, thanks for coming on the show. Thanks for coming on the show as well, Clarky. Thanks to both of you for bringing yourselves along to the show. Stevie, what kind of a flatmate are you?

Are you a good flatmate? Are you a good flat mate? Are you a bad flat mate? Are you a weak tidy what's going on? I don't know, I'm quite messy. It's probably not a good flat mate, but also very tolerant. So I think I was going to say, yeah, right? So if anyone does anything, I'm always like, oh, you know, I was going to say if they

shine the floor, I'd be like, oh, yes, fine. Oh my god, you sell off the perfect hose mate. Yeah, I'm like, great. But then, yeah, I don't know what they'd have to the perfect hose, mate. Yeah, that's great. But then, yeah, I mean, I don't know what they'd have to do for me tonight to get quite angry, probably shit on me. That's probably the only thing they'd have to do to get me angry.

You're a terrible house. Tom suddenly got me out. We can't live together anymore. So what are the key things you've tolerated in the past? Messiness pets that aren't our pets. People bring animals in. Okay, talk us a bit. So pets that aren't your pets. Yeah, like, oh, there's a cat. Let's bring it in.

No. Yeah. It's like, obviously, a cute cat keeps coming to the door. So you're sort of feeding her. A feeding her. Yeah, cats are annoying. Yeah, but it's not mine. It's unionally like, well, obviously, I love the old woman. Who's like, where's my cat. It's you know, like well, obviously the old woman who's like wears a cat. It's in my bed

It does look incriminating on you. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I do fuck out You're the perfect housemate Tom is suddenly back on board. What are the coast? Speaking of Tom. Who have you brought along with you this week? Well terrible news everyone the jamboreez in danger I know a sports team got relegated I'm going to be honest with you. That's just like the word. But so I've hired in the top coach in the region, the whole region. Which region is that Tom? The big region of the Jamboree. Oh, the Jamboree, you could say. It's the coach with the munch. It's Tessa Coats! Tessa Coats!

Yes! APPLAUSE Coach, coach. So Tessa, the question to everyone's lips is, do you fuck cats? No, no, no. The question is, what kind of a flatmate are you? Are you a tolerant flatmate?

Very tolerant. I would rate myself as loads of fun. Great. When we were looking for a spare room person, I mean, flatmate. Flatmate. What? We call it a flatmate here, but spare room person seems a little cold. I'm not going to say just a fun way of describing it.

Spare room person doesn't sound like loads of fun tests, so I'm not going to. Sorry, yeah. I see now. In unpacking that story, obviously, I clearly managed to lose a housemate and would need to replace them with a stranger from the internet. So obviously I'm not the fun gal. Maybe you were too much fun. Well, yeah, and then I wrote the spare room advert. And then he got a series of notes saying that, we might from spareroom.com,

being like, you might wanna consider rewriting it, because you sound mad. I'm not gonna tell you the details as you put in there. Oh, just like our shower curtain was really fun, because I was like, I, I, I, So you're this kind of fun where you're fun in the way you keep using the word fun,

you're describing yourself. Yeah, yeah. I just really didn't want a boring person to come so I went too deep on the like we fun talk us through the shower Cut and what's I fun about? He loves this is the kind of thing cross-be-loved. I want to go very frost-nexting on this Talk to the shower code. What's is their Norman Bates behind it? What's the fun of it? It's white with the shadow effect of a unicorn having a shower. Oh my god! You know what? That is a lot of fun. That's a lot of fun. Already Stevie, you're not enjoying this.

No, I think you've never been around. Have you never been around Tessa's flat? I haven't seen a shower, no. I think when I've been in there, I've just been too busy fucking a cat. If it was a cat I would have shown you. You'd be all cut and driven and twisted. It's not fun that it's a rousing my friend. I can't, so I quite are rising on. Oh, top.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You kind of feel like they don't want you, so you want them all. But as dogs are like, I love you and you're like, yeah. What did anyone mind if I played the first round? I think we just wish it's crack on really, because I don't, before any animals get harmed in the making of this podcast, I played the first round. That's... I think we just wish us crack on, really, because... I'd... Before any animals get harmed in the making of this podcast,

we have met our contestants. Let's find out who's bubbling under and who's going full steam as we play round one. Whoa! CHEERING I was staying in a bed of afraid to one night one night and I fenced it in the back. The lights settled right, so I jumped into the tub and began to put wind. But what happened next made me cry, my hair on the my asshole with tremendous force.

Some bubbly bubbles began to spread forth. You didn't tell me you had a hot bike ride. And I would go to a hot town they would buy it. It was just a normal bath. I produced bio gas. And I started to frowl. So very next moment, but I'm not watered to frown! Oh, I'm... Oh, dear.

Oh, dear. Oh, dear. It's true. It's singing after weeks. It's a real hero. That really is it. That really, keep it out of my ears please, if you don't mind. Oh my goodness. Well, lovely jingle there from Tom and Ben.

I just like to stress that it was Tom and Ben who recorded that. So, the first round, we keep coming last in Eurovision. But maybe we could change that. About a person shitting in a bar. I mean, it's universal. It's bigger than us. That's a good joke. That's a good...

That's a good... LAUGHTER Do you know what, Tessa? That's the perfect response. You're a good joke. You are a lot of fun. I'm not gonna lie to you, Tessa. That's a good joke.

You're a lot of fun. This is how you play round one. So round one is called Jack. Who's he? Or she? Or indeed they. I'm gonna give each player five famous Jacks or Jackies they don't have to describe them to their teammate one word at a time.

Their teammate has to guess after each word. At the early you get it, the more points you get. Obviously. Now, no jacuzzi is complete without fizz, so after every incorrect guess, both players have to take a squig from this bottle of Prosecco. Where's the lead? There you go. So, once a correct Jack slash Jackie is guessed, the other teammate has to go as to guess on the next Jack, Jack, Jacky. You're on the timer. We'll start with Stevie and Ben. Tom, you're going to pop the cork for us if you must.

I see. Oh! Yay! That's a lot of fun. He's going first. I'll tell you what, Stevie, why don't you go first? Oh, OK. OK.

You're going to regret that. OK. You're on the timer. Yeah. You're going to say go? Okay, okay, you're gonna regret that okay, and you are you are on the timer. Yeah You can say go I Thought on the time of men go But I tell you what you're now off the timer And you are on the time of go Yeah, that's not a word. Oh, I'm going to allow it

Jackie Chan Jackie Chan is right. That's not a word! I'm going to allow it. Jackie Chan. Jackie Chan is right. That's five points. Pirate. Jack Sparrow. Jack Sparrow is right. That's five points. Flag.

That's not a word. Flag is a word. You've got to have a guess. Oh, black. I'm going to take a sip. Union Jack, that's four points. Prostitudes. Good, Lord. Gosh. He has one sip of Prosecco.

Oh, Jack. Boss. Oh, that is demands. The boycars doesn't make that much money. Oh, God. Prostitudes, prostutes. Jacksy? Guys, family Jack is a jacksy.

I mean, you didn't you to have a drink. Take a sip. Absolutely, I knew. It's not Jackson. Murderer. Jack, the river. That's four points. Oh, books.

Okay, discount the... But books is your word. Books. Okay, discount the, um, but, but books is your word. Books, oh. Oh. She's got books as well. I haven't read it. Um, is it a cat? It's the shades of Jack. No, no, no, no.

Okay, that was a trick. Okay, another word. Wait. You just put it all on the own pocket. You just pushed your breasts up. I pushed my breasts up and they didn't need words, baby. LAUGHTER That's five points. Not relevant to that.

It's not relevant to the answer, I don't know who it is. You're just using this time to flirt, baby. Yes. OK, you've got 10 seconds left. Pass. Does anyone in the audience know who it's supposed to be? Your time is up, I don't. I don't.

Oh, I don't know. It's Jackie Collins. That's four points to the audience know who it's supposed to be? Your time is up. I don't so. Oh, I don't know. It's Jackie Collins. That's four points to the audience. So... What? What? What did this match go? Yeah.

Books was a good clue. Thank you very much. Thank you. The audience are on your side. OK, now, so Tom and Tessa, Mewi, would you like me to say go or you're on the timer? Go, obviously. Go, OK, go. I'll give you a minute. Go, it's fine.

Your time starts now, go. Here's... Jack Nicholson. Oh, very good, five points. Rock! Rock. Rock's on. Steve.

Rock. Rock. Oh. School of Rock. Jack. Black. Black. Just rock! Rock! Oh! School of Rock! Jack? Black! Wow! Okay, um, um, oh no.

Oh, oh. These are all words. Drums. It's bad. Drums. Jack. Dyef. Gums. Jack, knife. Jack. What?

Seven. Oh. Seven drums. LAUGHTER Send me anything and then I'll take a... Jack, flash. Not Jack Flash, no. Not Jumping Jack Flash. Nation.

Ah, Jack White. Jack White, that's three points. Yes, um heel Jack and Jill yes, oh well done. Oh Surprise Sila black Not silly Jack and two two six left on T-Six LAT on. LAUGHTER LAUGHTER

LAUGHTER LAUGHTER LAUGHTER LAUGHTER Thirty seconds left. Oh, shit. I'm spooky. Jack O'Lanton.

Oh! A toy. Jack in a box. Yes, yes, yes. Well, that's three points. Jack. Couserak. Oh, no.

Splattering. Oh, sh-bucker. Pull it, Jackson, pull it. Yes. Well, that's three points two points Spluttering The perfume Chanel president Jack Kennedy. Yes. Wait, what? We're just moving on. It's not Jack Kennedy. It's not Jack Kennedy.

Jack. Wait, you're time is up. We like the game. Jack, you're the only species. He doesn't matter that you like the game. He's the only species. He's the only species. It was Jackie O'Nasses.

Yeah, we can't give many points for that. It's not Jack Kennedy. Jack, Fiction Off, Love Island. That is your test. Oh, I see who Mills meets my best one. No, it's not Jack. It Fiction Off Love Island. That is your test. Oh, I see who that's me, he's my best one. No, to guys, over at Warner Bros. That's me and Jack. Oh, right.

Guys, the game is over. I cast... I see some four played in the game. I create a game. I can't stress it out. You have a weight trick game. No! How is it?

Tom Clancy writes about him. Jack Ryan. Yeah. Um... Um... Okay, it, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um Okay, so how much of a lightweight is it because your hammered already pancakes? I think it's pancakes, is that my name? Jack Johnson? Jack Johnson.

Pancakes, pancakes. We don't have the rights to pancakes unfortunately. Everyone's got the rights to pancakes. Always believe that. Well that was messy. Messier than expected for what I think was three Sips of Champagne. the reds the pancakes. Oh, where's Paulina? Now, well, that was Messi. Messi, Messi, Messi, and expected for what I think was three sips of champagne. So, so producer Quinn, at the end of that round, can you tell us please,

what are the scores? So Ben and Stevie have 23, Tom and Tessa, and believeably have 25. Oh! And the other time, he's just having a good time. He's having a good time. You squashed. What do you want? Light up your pricks. Oh So Tom and Tessa in the lead but Stevie and Ben aren't yet in hot water They're still everything to play for as we play round two it's flat games

Roll the dice, spin that thing, put that down, do as you told, games. If you lose you get nothing, games. If you win you get goals, goals, goals, goals. Listen to that, BBC3. Time to get us back in! It's up to that goal! Can't get that on eye-players. Yes, it's flat games. When this time, we're going to be playing our version of Grand Theft Auto. Oh!

Another bottle of Prosecco there. We may lose our grass roots fan base here if we keep this up. Ah, so yes, we're playing our version of Grand Theft Auto, which we're calling brand theft advo of all things. Are you sick and tired? It's really strong this time, it's good. Are you sick and tired of adverts lying to you? Think the jingle for McDonalds shouldn't be,

do do do do do do, I'm loving it, but do do do do do, I've got the shits, then this is the game for you. I'm gonna give each player a list of brands, I would like them to devise brand new honest jingles for as many as possible You'll sing the jingle to your teammate you have to guess the brand name and sing it back to you extra points for catchy jingles and honest slogans You've got a minute each so Tom you're gonna go first there are your brands. You've got five Tom Yes, Off you go. When you're fancy, you're pint and it isn't yet noon, you can always come to

Weathers Boons. Yes, absolutely right. One point. I put on secret brows and I've taken off my trousers and I'm on the website! You porn! It's a good guess. I miss let you there, actually. It's just a website about cat. I've made it secret brows in, I'm searching around the houses. It's Google in Cognito. It's Google, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What did you tell me? I've got 50 seconds left. It's a real, a long sandwich for you. Subway. Yes. We didn't say year and it's full of sugar. It's in the shape of a hens pooh. Okay, that's your time.

Tester. Sorry, what was the first word? It's in the shape of a hens pooh. Now, can I just... That is a Cadbury's creemeck It is a Cadbury's creemeck Tom, Tom, Tom He's an exon-tom!

I'm a scientist I just frowned a knife What are the animals shit to you when you think Tom? Just out of interest Galpat? I'm veggie, so it's a way to get my beef I can't talk, but you're so good at that Okay, do you do your level?

Your time starts now I'm a woman in red and I wanna get thin. What do I eat three times a day? It's special cake. Oh, it's a race of the great. Can I smash this game? Okay, I buzzed, no, that's good. Not as good as pizza or express,

but got lots of zeds in my name. Like a bee or sleaze. It's good. Like a pizza. Bees. Sort of rhymes with beesbees. It sort of rhymes with beesbees, yeah. It's quite a nice exercise. Oh, okay. It's really well. Do exactly the same thing again, because it's really good. It sort of rhymes with bees bees yeah

Okay really well do exactly the same thing again Just go to this pizza Express not pizza hut and I've got Okay It's easy, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, okay Got some fruit by my yoghurt, but I don't know how to mix them. I don't know how to mix them I Can't mix them The answer I'm minting my yard and Get me the answer Pizza

So fruit and fruit corner mother fruit corner that is your time. That is your time. That is very old Yes, very strong Very strong show so hot right now your egg was set in the 90s. It's really hot, that's special, okay? Right, Tessa, those are your prods. Your time starts now. We don't like races, then we keep putting Nigel Farage on question time. BBC.

Correct. LAUGHTER I'm a lady and I just wanted to buy some socks when I was on Oxford Circus and now I've been in this shop for seven hours and I've bought a lot of Hufflepuff memorabilia. Welcome to Pramark! Yes! I need to go to Pramark after that advert. Who am I? What do we sell? What is this?

I think you find me at the train station. And a little clue for you, Tom. You don't. That's right. Just here. Sorry. In our previous jingle, we confused ourselves. We thought we were the pumpkin cafe. But we're not. So, okay, driving home, I'm on the road.

No! I'm so tired and I want a good coffee, but I guess I'll take this coffee just from this petrol station and it sort of tastes like shit, but I'm real tired. What? The wild bean cafe? Yes! That is it! that's your time, guys. Oh! That was so strong. That was rubbing fun.

You were having so much fun, and it was so strong. But I'm afraid we have to pass over to Clarke. That found my Well-Been Cafe with a Bruce Bringsdine song. I could have gone on for seven minutes. Like a Bruce Bringsdine title, doesn't it? The sound of a thunder, Well-Been Cafe. LAUGHTER Sandra Goam get me a latte and get really fasted to the queue.

All the spring scene names, Sandra is not one of her. Clarke, your minute begins now. Oh, this is some sweet Italian bread. Yeah, have it with your mates. It's quite fancy, but not too fancy. You'd go there when you were 18 and think it was a good meal. Oh, good. Shall we tell you it's not a restaurant?

Is it? You might have already mentioned it. That's your Tally. Shall. Oh, I can't say the name of the Italian bread. So, do you eat the stuff off? It's not like terrible at this game. Italian brand.

A bridge. A bridge. That's not CZs. Stranger? No. I feel like more of a bitch. I want to tell you, you're bread and now want it quick. JB's Italian.

Oh my god. Is it ask? Is it ask? It's when you're bread-pong. But you're bread-pong. OK. JB's Italian Oh my god Is it asked? Is it asked? It's not It's not bread It's not bread, but it can't say the name of the bread because it's in the title Shabbatza James

Shabbatza James Shabbatza James It was Shabbatza James Everybody Shabbatza James So folks Shabbatza James It was Tripata gyms, everybody. Tripata gyms! Um, so folks, Tripata gyms! This episode is sponsored by Tripata gyms. Now if you are, it's a pointless job. If you are in need of a good Italian bread,

and you don't want any pizza, then get yourself down to a Tripata gyms. Oh man. Look, yeah, you couldn't look. It's a tricky one. Italian bread. Why did you go down that alleyway? Bread was confusing.

Bread was confusing. But I mean that's what a pizza's made out. I only got my dough balls. It's not a toy for Italian bread. Forcature I was thinking. Forcature in the rye. That's a different game. That's a different game.

That's better than the Tabasera chips. Tabasera chips. Tabasera chips, though. We enjoyed it now. Produced Gwynn. That's a gym. The entire gym, we enjoyed it now. Producer Gwynn, that was an incredible round. I'm sure there was incredible scores at the end of it. Producer, your batter Gwynn, tell us now at the end of that round. What has that done to our scores? Tom and Tessa have 32 and Ben and Stevie have 24.

Oh! It's fall. And you can get anything you need with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no. You can't get a maple tree on Uber Eats. But maple syrup and maple lattes? Yes.

We can deliver that. Uber Eats. Get almost, almost anything. Order now. Product availability may vary by region. See you at your details. Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes.

Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman planting her coast of freedom. agency at her details. I've come up with an alternative jingle for the next round. If your flatmates give you grief, we have gotten easy fix. Call upon the brothers, beef, before you end up killing those bricks. It's me brothers! Yeah, you've got a problem, I've got a problem, but you've got a problem, call the beef, if you've got a beef, then we can help you, from the starting of the beast. Yes, it's me from 2021.

We ask our panelists to sort out a flat share of bass beef. And today's one comes from Benji, who is in our audience here tonight at the Southern Theatre. Oh, Benji. Benji, this is a spicy miter ball, as Chibatagin might say. LAUGHTER Chibatagin.

Chibatagin, let's say, a mommam-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m- and wank me off overarms. LAUGHTER How is that? How is that? I have so many questions. So many questions. What is overarms? Can we, Benji, continue? I've told her it's weird, so has... So has everyone.

Everyone! Everyone else! Everyone else in the room thinks it's a bit weird. Everyone has a doggy call. I think it's a stupid. She says it's more comfortable. I'd rather she didn't bother. Now, Benji, wow, that is to be turning down a hand shandy. That's a big thing for a gentleman.

Benji, hello. Hello, Benji. Can I just ask one very quick question before we ask, we'll throw it with the panel in a second. Benji, can I just ask, is your girlfriend here this evening? She is not. She is not here this evening, okay? She's out there. She's got the gym working out. Practicing.

The big question, now the likes have gone up. The big question is, I mean, we've all Googled it, but what's it over our point? Where are you, where is she? Yeah The big question is, I mean, we've all Googled it. But what's it over our points? Where are you? Where's she? Yeah. What position is her arms in relation to your jump? Both in bed.

And I thought, God, can I ask both in bed and both presumably lying down? Correct. OK, very traditional. Imagine if you were in a normal way that you would expect it to be done, and then turn your hands in 180 degrees, so you're saying she doesn't do this. Yes, exactly. Oh Ready, okay, so for the listener at home. It's like she's digging a sand castle. No, that's not

No, no, it's like it's like thumbs up normal way thumbs down her way She's actually going from staying. She's going thumbs down on your knob. Yeah, that's right. Correct, yeah, exactly like that. For the list right home, I'm getting quite aroused. Do you want to be my girlfriend? So can I just ask, if the audience here will do that, does that feel like you're exercising muscles

that you don't normally exercise? That feels like I'm working out bits of my arm that I shouldn't ordinarily. Oh, wait. Try it at home. Try it at home. Now, guys, it's thumb's down position. I tell you what fat, if you're on the tube right now

to the person to your right, put your thumb down. Oh, drop his other the row machine. Trump, who sides on who? Before we get into this. Very good point. Tessa and Tom, you are on Benji side. Stephen Ben, you are on the girlfriend side. Good luck, absolutely.

So, have a few questions. So, she is leading across your body? No, so I... She's on the left, I'm on the right and she's using her right arm. So I'm you, right? Correct, yeah, yeah. So I'm you and she's doing that. Yeah. Can easily just ignore you.

She's facing away from you sometimes. Pretty much. Oh, Benji. Oh, Benji. Okay, that's on time. Pretty much, yeah. God! Oh, Benji! Oh, Benji! Okay, that does seem so much to unpack. That does seem strange. Does anyone have any, I mean, we've all got questions.

The first time that happened, were you taking a back? I think it was too early in the relationship to say anything. How long have you been going out with this girl? Five years. Oh! I think it's, yeah, it's now got to that point where you can't bring it up, can't you? Does it affect the, um, the feet, because I, like, does it affect the positivity of the whang?

I think, yeah, I think so, it's weird. Does it feel like someone else is doing it? What's the best? Does she sit on her hand before she likes you? Don't know what I'm for the boys. Don't be funny, but because of the overarm nature, does it feel a bit less personal? I've never thought of it that way. It's still pretty personal.

Is your main issue with it the weirdness? Or like, is there an other, it doesn't feel... Why have you come today? That's also what she asks. Yeah! But like, is your main thing just like, you're lying there being like, this is so weird, or are you like, it feels bad? It doesn't, yeah, it doesn't feel right.

Why do you just ask us to do it? I'm drunk. She has. I have. I'm so sorry. I wasn't listening. It's, she was feeling rough in conversations, but she, it's easier. She says it's easier.

So hang on, you're all just sat around the pub with your mates. So you're going to go, oh, this is good, isn't it? You're on a good day of work. Hey, tell someone else whank someone off over rock. Is that what you did? It was a weekend away, but yeah. Oh, she knows! You said it in front of your mates with her and you said,

can you won't come here on a funter off? Not in my life, we need to help them out. What were the words that you used in front of her friends that you said to do that? It was just a conversation in general. Yeah, I got one. We're all friends here, Benji. Tell us how's it going?

Tension now in the corner. It's a high-lost confidence in this. LAUGHTER Benji, back yourself, the secret to good sex is communication I've been told by other people. Now, you need to communicate these things. And I appreciate we have put you on the spot there. We won't ask you any more questions.

You have our 100% support. Tessa, you're going to begin the case. What's my job, sorry? No, you're on Benji's side. You left or right? You don't have... I don't get out much. You don't have a minute to put forward your case for the prosecution game. No, you remember, you're on Benji's side.

What is the prosecution mean? I have to send the goprocure. It's always nice when you realise a guest doesn't listen to the shot. It happens more often than not as well. Increasingly so. OK, your minute tessecoats begins now. Ladies and gentlemen, the prosecution of the jury. That's such a good start.

She knows all the terms. May I approach the bench? No. Exhibits. Are you approaching it underarm or are you? Please look at exhibit A in the leaflet. I prepared Tom the wheels have come off makes objection You can't object to yourself I do I do you're on I do

I use up my time yet 25 seconds left ladies and gentlemen the jury I firmly believe that my climate, Benjamin or Benji, if you will, has brought something here today which is a huge personal issue. Oh no. A huge problem. And this has happened in the first week if he lucked out, and it happened early on in the relationship, we'll assume, week is a good-looking guy.

From week one for the last five years, this man has endured an extraordinary thumbs-down experience. Every time he wants to be intimate with his girlfriend, and all that I ask of you is that the girlfriend looks him in the god damn eyes and turns her hands around. Okay, that's all I ask of you. Objection. Thank you very much.

Tessa Coates everybody. Thank you very much. Tessa Coates everybody. Steady, a lot of points there. A lot of points there. I don't know if you're going to get time to address them all, but you have one minute to be in your case for the defence. And the defence of the game, yeah.

Okay, great. Again, always a pleasure to meet some fans. It's a defence of the game. I do listen, but I don't understand chords. Okay. Fine, okay, so yes, you are obviously, you're on the girlfriend side. You're on the girlfriend side. Okay, your minute begins now.

Ladies and gentlemen, of the jury, as a woman who has a wrist, some type of tube, sorry, that's bad of me. Sometimes your wrist hurts and you don't know why you're bending it in that way. When a woman has a wink, she doesn't use a wrist, like a man does. So she might not know to turn it, She might know she's doing it over on. I mean, this is all the relations of it. It really shouldn't be. You don't use your wrist.

I'm bringing it here, my friend. You want to object? Object. So in summary, I would say that if you've commute, like the other other the prosecution man the man Fengi the man he has said the asked his my client to change she had good reasons to not change and I would say isn't a hand shan D better than no shan D at all I'm really impressive. I want to join most about it. No full stops. Didn't use a full stop all the way through. A new rule, why not? So, Benji, how do you think it's going so far? My good friend.

Yeah, very well. I like it style, Benji. These used to lying about things like that. LAUGHTER So... Thank you, that's lovely. Oh, no, it's fine, it's fine. Tom, now, if you're turned to conclude the case for the prosecution... Are you going to be doing it yourself this time? No, I'm going to be doing it in the style of a deep-south defence lawyer from a John Grisham novel. Oh yes. Mr. Fan Shaw Standard. Fan Shaw Standard in presiding

and providing your minute should you need it begins now. Ladies and gentlemen of Detroit. I'm looking out there and I see a lot of faces there that I recognize. Hell, that goes Jonathan. Your mother runs the bakery. It burns that bread. Oh, amen. Keep trying to tell. We have a lot of big words here from them, their lawyers over there from the big city. Master Beeson.

What's that? Hell, we simple church going folk round here. We don't know nothing about no masturbation. We simple folk. God fear him. Farm him country. Let me tell you a little story now. Failure might recognize from the village there. When by the name of Sam Ham. You remember old Sam Ham, the old acres out past the post. Where one post town, proud of it, they try to bring in that second post. God for us, not round here.

Dem Dem lawyers, over there, with Dem Seven Posts. Elpacta Post, Sam Hamden with his acres. Paul himself a wild ball. Probably remember now, went by the name of Paul. He'll go out to that Monday morning, could Sam Ham get that milk off that ball? Hell no, milk until Wednesday. Mist, supper, tugging, tugging, tuggin, feedin' the ball.

Tuggin' to the ball. Tuggin' feedin' rubbin' to post. There's more than one way to milk a ball, ladies and gentlemen. In the end, Sam, ham killed and donated. Never did taste that milk. Come to think of it, I don't think balls produce milk. But what a sandwich. No further questions. you all are. Very strong case there for Fanchillis Danden. Great to hear the story of Sam Ham. Now, Clarky, you're going to conclude the case for the defence. Your minute begins now. Look, it's a tough old life.

It's a tough old life. It's all right in the round. I want to talk about you lovely lady. We don't know her name. I'm presuming Syla Jack. Syla Jack off. She... Oh, it's good stuff. I mean,, you had to say it, it isn't.

Uh... All I'm saying is, it's hard, you know? I mean, I hope so. I don't know, maybe not after. But, you know, we've got to... Basically, you've got to lend a hand. Many hands make light work. We've got to, basically, you've got to lend a hand. Many hands make light work.

If you don't like how it's being done, do it yourself. I rest. Lovely staff from Parking. His final words, his final words, sadly. Now, are I me? Now, sadly, I can't adjudicate this beef brother, because actually I actually give myself the underhand reach around.

So, he was without sin cast the first son. It's not going to be me. Underarm cast. Believe you me, yes. Instead, I'm going to call up on our so-ho theatre audience to decide now. If you think Tessa and Fanashore and therefore Benji is in the right, applaud with either hand. applaud now.

OK, we've lost the camera the card, isn't it? So but if you think Stevie and Ben made the best case. I'll let you to applaud now Benji, I'm never so sorry it turns out your girlfriend is right to the older Underarm over arm even Benji, how do you feel? Oh? Wombly free Benji, how do you feel? Oh, underarm, underarm, Wombly free. Benji, how do you feel? It feels like great injustice. It feels like a great injustice.

Yeah. Oh, my, I'm sorry to hear that, but will you stick to it? Yeah. The sheets, I mean. Now, next up, it's soft, it's strong, it's very, very long, it's the Quick Fire Jing jingle. Let's hear it! This is the quick fire round. It's the round that goes really quickly

Which is why it's quiet I'm using to us, it has a long introduction Oh, we're very smart about it It's our favorite joke I hope you enjoy it too You You see it's a quick round that is played really quick but the introduction slow. Clever boy. The only problem with this joke is when we sit there with this joke is when we sit there and have to watch an audience get bored. It's happening right now,

we're just sat there at the tables and the audience is starting to shuffle a comfortably. The audience is starting to shuffle A comfortable It's always embarrassing The guests don't know what to do with themselves They're fidgeting in their seats And after the show, we tell ourselves It's okay, it's for the listeners back at home

But even they aren't enjoying They're shuffling in their seat And across these furious He wants to wrap this up And by this point, in the live record the audience Have started whispering things to each other And throwing a shade, I can see you looking at me One time's the last tube hole But what can we say? I mean, one times the last few poems.

But what can we say? It's become a bit of a tradition. So I guess we just have to keep on doing this long introduction. Where do you stay? So how about you just get on board? And how about the live audience gives us a cheer! And the audience listening at home, how about you do the same right now!

Well, there you go, we'll see you again next week for the quick fire Oh, lovely stuff. Meta on Meta there. In this quick fire round we would like you to insert the words hot tub into each answer you give So if the question was for example, which musician is famous for such songs as Rocket Man and Tiny Dancer, the answer would be Hot Elton Tub John. I've tried playing it myself. It's really hard. So Hot Good Tub Luck.

Instead of buzzes, I'd like you to shout out your first name with Hot Tub on either side of it. So, yes, it's hard So Ben and Stevie let's hear that now hot Ben tub. I love it. It's a hot tub Stevie hot tub I also like hot tub Stevie hot tub That's like we say stuff on a Friday night hot tub Stevie hot Tom and Tessa Tess has gone into a mind palace

So calm there Hot Tess a gone into a mind palace. It's so calm there. Hot Tessetub. Yes. Hot Tomtub. Hot Tomtub, very... Hot Tessetub. I think you're going to be good at this Tom. Can I shout Hot Tomtub as well? You can shout Hot Tomtub as well.

Yes, I feel much better about that. Okay, you can all shout Hot Tomtub if you want. No, no. No, both of you. Yeah, I mean all of that team. Yes, well we're not interested in that. No, they don't want to slice that action fair enough. So here we go. Here we go with the first question. What long running soap opera features the pub, the Rovers Return? Hot Tom, yes Tom. Hot correlation, tub streak, correct. What song by the Eagles features the line you can check out anytime you like? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, out any time you like. Oh, Tom, Tom, Tom. It's... Hotel, hot, Tom, Tom, kind of.

Oh, Tessa, you're doing so well. Please, she's very distressed right now. Give us some space. Hotel, Tom, you can't afford it. Yes, well done. What drink is a winter favourite, and often topped with whipped cream and marshmallows? Hot Tom Tom Tom! Yes, Tessa. Tessa what?

Hot Tom chocolate! Correct! What breed of dog was bait open? Hot Tom chocolate! I can't believe she's talking about it. Tessa again! Hot Satan's top banana! I mean, you're hustling so well, yeah, this is amazing.

I'll aim at it that you guys know. What is the phrase used by Tim Onom Pumber in the Lion King to mean no worries? It's hot of Stevie Top Top. Hot Top Stevie Top Top. Hot Top Stevie Top Top. Hot Top Top Meta... Oh no, just the words. Look, you've had a Prosecco, it's time to go home.

OK, it's hot. OK, it's hot. Hot Akuna Tup Matata. That's exactly what we're after, yes. Please don't say that, that's what you said. Definitely not what you said. Stevie, so far away from what you said. What is the, OK, listening up, everybody.

What is the term for when a cricket comes out to bat in an innings has not been dismissed by the end of the innings. Hot tub Tom. Hot tub Tom. Hot tub Tom. Hot, not Tom bout. Correct. Given the artist's song name that features the lines I get knocked down but I get up again. Hot tub Tom! Hot tub, tub, thumping, tub, hot. Gross! Hot tub, tub, tub. Hot tub, tub, hot tub, tub, thumping. I'm asking for the artist and the song name, please. Oh shit. I've got a hot tub, tub, thumping.

But at least I guess it's not answered yet. Hot, tumble, humber. Tub, tub, thumping. It's correct. Yesubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtubtub, yes. Hot ping-tub-bong. Oh! Absolutely correct. He's very strong at this game. What? What is the name of the girl group behind the song shout out to my ex and so it's... Oh, hot tub, tub! Okay, Stevie... Stevie was just their first tesser. Hot little mix, tub mix! You know what a mean tub.

Hot little mix, tub mix. Close enough. You know what a mean tub. Hot little mix, tub mix. Close enough. You know what a mean tub. Like kidding. What instant snack food requires boiling water and chicken and mushroom being... Hot tub tub tub tub tub tub noodles. Yes. What films during Tom Cruise is set in the United States? Hot tub tub tub. Yes.! Hot Top Tungue! What? Oh! It's not Hot Top Tungue!

Thank you for sending me that link, by the way. Hot Top Tung! Karky. Hot Top Tung. Top Gump. Correct! What film shot starring Charlie Sheen was a parody of Top Gump? Hot Top Tung! Hot Top Tung! Hot Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Top Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh Would you like to plug your podcast? Not bad. No, not really. No, okay, fair enough. Oh.

No, we do a podcast called Novody Panic. It's fine. And I don't know. I'm doing some previews. I'm not that drunk for them. But if you want to come and see my show, please do. Great, fantastic. If you want to go to Sevy, Tessie,

you don't get in with the show? No, baby. That's why I look so calm. LAUGHTER You did not look down. No, that's why I look so calm. LAUGHTER You did not look calm, you know, that's good for me. I'm talking to you! If this is you calm, I would hate to see you rattles. LAUGHTER

Before we get to the final scores, don't forget, of course, if you enjoyed this podcast, it leaves you a review on iTunes, five stars, please, you can donate or join our Patreon at shityeandmoney.com. Thank you so much everyone, it's joined the Patreon so far, you've all been so wonderful, thank you so much. Yes. And we add bonus stuff and all kinds of fun goodies and we've just worked out the t-shirt prints, so that's going to be good. So, I produced a win, let's hear those final scores. So Ben and Stevie have 30 but Tom and Tessa were the winners with 42 So Ben and Stevie get to heat the hot tub while Tom and Tessa can destroy me in it I didn't reason me because I thought some boring about pardon party source on nom nom as we used to say Thanks to our guest Tessa coach and Stevie Martin Happy Scratch! Happy Scratch!

It's a slam down feature! Matthew Crossbeak made the last one! Top-howie! Go, go, go, go, go! With special... With special... With special against Cessica, Cess down, it's a sick news production. I got a spade, I need it.

Jesus, I'm mine! APPLAUSE Cool. That's me pouring a drink. I touched the brilliant episode. Please, please, you clarified what that was because... I'm a foliarist, did I tell you that? You're a piss artist, you're like...

Listen, Tom. Yes. What a good episode that was. Thank you. And Ben, congratulations, too. Thank you very much. The Italian bread will haunt me for the rest of my days. Oh, wow. Yeah. The Italian bread. All right.

Allian bread. I can tell you now after the fact I've thought about that on at least 10 different occasions. What was I thinking? Do you know what? Moments like that always stay with you. I have got a similar moment when some, I was on a very bad episode of the second and final time

I was invited on eight out of 10 cats to count down. Oh no, no, it was normal cats actually, it was the normal cats. And it was going very, very badly. Every almost having a tough time. And a comedian who was a visiting comedian, like an international comedian who didn't understand the show,

and thought he was basically interviewed, was telling very, very, very long stories that hadn't like no real ending to them. And it was cocky. It was cocky, yeah, it was cocky. And in order to, and so I talk about the moon landings, I don't know why. Oh no. And in order to bring it back, I guess it's because I hadn't said a lot for a while, so the producer was probably in Jimmy Zieg and bring Crosby in.

So he said, Matthew, do you think the moon landing was a fake? What a hospital part of a question, of course. You were incredible. And I started like, fun-faring and going, well, I mean, I know that a lot of people think it was as Stanley Kubrick. And the thing is, like, obviously, people talk about the

wave of the flag. I started just like listing things I knew about it, and until eventually I stopped talking and the conversation moved on, and then I was quiet for another 40 minutes. But I probably think about that twice a week. Yeah, I've list it. That's it, it's always there. But you know what?

In the telling of it now, I feel like I've gone some way towards letting it go, and I hope in the listing to this podcast, Glocky. Oh no, I will never listen to this podcast. I'm getting a point. I don't even listen to everyone's I'm good in. I've nailed every single interaction I've ever had. So I'd never have that.

That's a good point, actually. You've never made a mistake in your life. I go back thinking everything's thinking. Nailed it, nailed it, nailed it. Well Tom, can I just ask you one question? Yes. Do you think the moon ladders were faked? Nailed that.

Please nailed it again. That's a pretty good idea. Nailed it again. It was pretty good. My interest in this anecdote is fake. That's why I'd have said it. Whoa! Nice one.

Absolutely. We're all way after the event. Absolutely. Yeah, I wish I could go back and edit it. You would have loved it. Yeah. You're going, yeah. I've heard the old. Absolutely. Yeah, I wish I could go back and edit that. You would have loved it. Yeah. I've heard the old honk. You've heard the honk. You've earned the big honk. You've got to earn the big honk. You've got to earn the big honk.

You've got to earn the big honk. Speaking of big honk, if you've got any honk you want to send it away, join the Patreon. It's patreon.com forward slash Pappy's flat share. We've got a few Patrons. There'll be a Patreon neighbour who'd watch Roll Call after this. We've got some new stuff coming up on the Patreon. Also as well, if you can't do any of that, leave us a review on iTunes. Or recommend a friend. Recommend us to a friend. No.

And where are we going to be live? Oh, we've got a couple coming up. Just one this time. Oh, we've just got one coming up. That's the other one in the past now. And you know what? Melt it. Melt it.

Guys, the one that's in the past, we course. And you know what? Meld it. Meld it. Guys, the one that's in the past, we absolutely nailed it. You'll be able to hear it in about four months' time. Oh, we've got the London Podcast Festival on the 8th of September. At King's Place. Oh, come along, you guys. Do come along, and we will tell you.

If the moonlandings were faked. Yes, we will be there. We'll fake the moonlandings live on stage. That is a promise that we cannot keep. We'll just fake them very badly. Sure, I'll do it. What else we'll be doing? Ah, just generally having fun.

It's absolutely right. Yes, stay listening for the Naver Watch Rockle. Otherwise, stay safe. This episode was produced by producer Emma. Corsum team. Corsum team. Corsium team. Cheers to Rua Mbai! Please be upstanding for this week's Patreon neighborhood watch Roll Call!

From which will you play? He's bought himself a bread maker. It's Nicholas Baker. That really works. That's really good. He's run out of data, so he's needed to order a bolt on. It's Samuel Goulton. Oh.

I would love to call him up on the phones. It's Matt Dorson Jones. Sadly, he's not feeling very well. It's poor old Rob Bell. Get well soon Rob. Won't you come out and over? Stop making a fool out of me. Hey everyone, it's Matthew Bagley. Oh, I like that. Bagley.

Hey everyone, it's Matthew Bagley. Won't you come on over? Stop making a fool out of me. Hey everyone, it's Ashley Norman. Rocky, you know the part we've established here. Yeah, sorry. She, oh, sorry, I've just come black. Won't you come on the floor?

Stop making a fool out of me. Hey everybody, it's Ellen and Fowler. Stop making a fool out of me. Everybody's gonna fall in love. Puh, puh, puh. Won't you come out over? Stop making a fool out of me. Hey everyone, it is amen-ly. Amen-ly. Why won't you come on over? Hey, Milly!

Satcha, you've been out time and... Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes! Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman planting her course to free to pat in love for. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things.

It's like theaters December 15th. woman plotting her course to free to add a lot for. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Poor things. It's like theaters December 15th.