Pardon My Take - Andrew Luck Retires, Rams' Andrew Whitworth And Mount Rushmore Of Guests We Want On The Show

Episode Date: August 26, 2019

Andrew Luck retired on Saturday night and we pick up all the pieces. Doug Gottlieb's dumb tweet, why Colts fans have every right to be sad, Andrew Luck making the right personal decision and why saying a guy is "too smart" at the combine isn't all that crazy (2:27 - 24:13). Who's back of the week including Breaking Bad and Wayne Brady (24:13 - 32:07). Mt Rushmore of guests we want to come on Pardon My Take (32:07 - 44:52). Future Hall of Famer Andrew Whitworth joins the show to talk about the twilight of his illustrious career, playing in Cincy, the Super Bowl and more (44:52 - 69:11). Segments include talking golf, drunk idea, trouble in paradise dwight howard, and a Monday Reading You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, Andrew Luck has retired. We also have Hall of Famer, Future Hall of Famer, Andrew Whitworth from the Los Angeles Rams, Mount Rushmore of guests we would love to have on this show, and Andrew Luck has retired. That's the big news. So we'll talk all about that. Before we do that, pardon my take is brought to you by the Cash App. You already know the Cash App, so here's a recipe for pasta pudinesca, a flavorful Neapolitan dish. In a large skillet, mash one tin of anchovies and their oil with four crushed garlic cloves. Add a quarter cup of olive

oil and simmer over medium heat until fragrant. Stir in a drained 28 ounce can of whole peeled tomatoes, a can of chopped black olives, and a jar of capers and break up the tomatoes with a wooden spoon. You need to read this like Giada de Laurenti, so just add like a little Italian note at the end of every food note. Don't tell me how to do my ad reads. Reduce the heat to low and simmer for an hour, then toss with a pound of pasta and a little pasta water to help it all stick. Serve immediately with grated parmesan, parmesan, and black pepper cash out. Okay, let's go! Welcome to part of my take presented by the Cash App code. Download it right now. Use code $5 for free. $5 to ASPCA. We also gave a free recipe for pasta pudinesca. Today is Monday,

August 26th. Anything big happened this weekend? Any future Hall of Famers retire in the prime of their career? The biggest story, maybe in the history of sports happened on Saturday night. That's the big debate going on right now because we're prisoners of the moment because we all are online all the time and so we can react to everything which makes sports a lot more fun to watch and to follow. But when Andrew Luck retired- Oh, I thought you were talking about Felipe Franks still being a fucking quarterback in the college football. He still stinks. But when Andrew Luck retired, the discourse shifted almost immediately from like, oh holy shit, Andrew Luck's retiring to, is this the craziest sports story to ever break? Yes. And while it was like a little bit shocking,

I was not ready for it emotionally and I had maybe drafted Andrew Luck in three out of my five fantasy leagues. It is, it's pretty fucking shocking that he just decided to quit at that time and the way that Schefter reported it, that whole thing, the story behind the story, I think there's still a lot that we have to learn about that. So while someone leaked it and then Schefter had the ball, so Schefter dropped the bomb and then from everything that's been written about, Andrew Luck, his plan was to tell his teammates after the game, the preseason game against the Bears, do a press conference on Sunday talking to the press. Instead, Schefter dropped it in the middle of the third quarter of the game and Andrew Luck then left the field to, at the after the game,

to booze, which we'll get to that. And Schefter had the balls to tweet out. Andrew Luck said he expected to tell his teammates that he was retiring Sunday before his timeline got moved up. Now, Schefter did his job, but dude, you are the reason why the timeline got moved up. You announced it and basically blew up Andrew Luck's entire plan of telling his teammates first and then telling the media. So it was shocking. It was crazy. The reactions, like we said, the booze, I think everyone was like, you know, that was, that was probably not right. And you know what? I bet you everyone who booed, like when you take them out of the moment, like, yeah, you know what? I was feeling, feeling shitty. Our franchise quarterback just retired at age 29. I'd probably take a mulligan

on that. I'd probably like that back. So I don't know which direction you want to go with it. I, I laughed so much about the internet, like the free points that were given out for everyone to fight the straw men being like, Andrew Luck has the right to choose whatever he wants to choose. All you fans bitching and moaning, where were the fans bitching and moaning? A lot of people thought it was weird. The ones at the stadium, I think. Yeah, but that was like what they were picking out was like the booze as he was walking off the field. And then you had, you can go to like Doug Gottlieb. You can go to your three Kings of sports takes and check those out like Doug Gottlieb. I think Mad Dog Russo said something. And then, man, I went straight to Danny Cannell.

Fuck Danny Cannell. He didn't fuck Danny Cannell for getting soft. Danny's livin out on us. That's a product. I think he's a front runner for a little bit of the year next year. Smoking weed. But nobody, it was basically, and then dockage as well. And Gottlieb got completely roasted and then tried to claim sarcasm, which it wasn't. And he got ratioed to the moon. His exact tweet by the way, Doug Gottlieb, you know, a guy doesn't know how to use Twitter when he says retiring because rehabbing is quote unquote too hard. It's the most millennial thing ever. Hashtag Andrew Luck. Just making sure that everyone knew that he was talking about Andrew Luck in the moment. Anyone searching for Andrew Luck on Twitter in that moment can get their takes straight from Doug.

But, but, but my bigger point is that I really don't, I think there were a lot of people who are just getting free internet points by claiming Andrew Luck has the right to do whatever he wants, which he does. I actually think that this, like when you hear him talk about the cycle of rehab and how he hasn't been right for a very long time, and Ryan Griggsen should basically go to, like, he should be charged with war crimes, what he did. Just put him in, yeah, and I'm down at Cuba. Andrew Luck's first four years in the NFL, he got hit more than any other quarterback. They didn't have an offensive line protecting a franchise quarterback. So I get where Andrew Luck's coming from. I just don't understand why it has to be all or nothing. I think Colts fans, I'm going to speak

up for Colts fans for a second. They have, I think it's totally fair for Colts fans to be like, you know what, this fucking sucks. Well, yeah. So I think that the big problem that the Colts fans would be entitled to have is the fact that this is two out of the last three seasons that Jim Ursay has basically told them we've got Andrew Luck going into this year, and then they don't. That brings up a whole another can of worms, which is what I think Dockage's big point was. So, well, that's not what he tweeted out on Saturday, but that's what he's tried to cover up with. But yeah, I think that Ursay, in the fact that he's paying Andrew Luck $25 million, like that's hush money right there. I don't know what Andrew Luck knows. He knows a lot of

shit about a lot of shit. And he knows a lot of stuff about Jim Ursay. There's a reason why Jim Ursay was rolling around in his, what was it, his Mercedes Benz with $30,000 in cash in the bag. That was hush money for Jim Sorgi. I think I think Andrew Luck, I think Jim Ursay is hoping that Andrew Luck after a year of being, you know, getting away from the game, maybe getting healthy is going to say, Hey, I really miss football and I want to come back. So that was, to me, a play by the Colts. And you have to take that risk like, Hey, if Andrew Luck decides he wants to play again, we want him to be like, I'm playing for the Colts no matter what, even though he's under contract and it would have been a whole thing. He's going to the XFL, but he would have,

he could have been like, I don't want to play for the Colts, but I want to come back. This now makes it, if he ever does want to come back, it's going to be for the Colts. But the Jim Ursay is, I mean, he's just such a weird character in this whole thing. Cause I, I'm pretty sure he's the one who leaked it to Adam Schafter. Yeah. So Ursay is like, he's always kind of tripping a little bit on some weird asset that he's done in the past. So when he found out that Andrew Luck was going to retire, he was probably like, man, I can't be dishonest to my friend Adam. I need to give him a call. Right. And he like hits him up, maybe butt dials him. I don't know. I don't know how, how Adam Schafter gets, maybe, maybe the Patriots have the Colts facilities bugged

from, that's when, okay, now it's all come together. McDaniels goes to Indianapolis, interviews to be their head coach, sticks a bug under the table. Now he's got all the info coming out of Indy. They call Schafter, Schafter reports it before Luck's ready. Oh, okay. So they got him that way. Yes. But keep the bug there and they'll never find the bug. Ursay would never find the bug. But people in the organization didn't know until yesterday either. Well, so it's, the timeline doesn't really make sense because they said that he's been mulling us for a few weeks now and almost, it sounds like he kind of had his decision made a couple of weeks ago. Again, I actually think Andrew Luck, like the way he describes it,

and there's been rumors that he has arthritis in his shoulder. And if he kept on playing, he wouldn't be able to like basically use his shoulder. And he's a smart guy, made a lot of money, obviously has a lot of hobbies outside of football. And so it makes sense for him. I just, I'm more speaking from a fan perspective, everyone jumps in saying Andrew Luck, like you, Andrew Luck doesn't know you anything. And that's true. But I still think Colts fans can be like, you know what, this fucking sucks. Yeah, but they've got swag Kelly ready to step up at a moment's notice. The other, the other thing that I was thinking about was, you know, when we always laugh about the, uh, combine interviews and the Josh Rosen, like, is this player too smart? Yes.

Absolutely is a real quite, everyone mocks it, including ourselves, but everyone, you know, the, the blue checkmark, we're great. We usually mocks it like, Oh, you can't have interest out of football. Well, this is actually a perfect case where Andrew Luck is a very smart guy. He has a ton of interest outside of football. I think he loved football. I think the injuries made him fall out of love with football because he's like, you know what, there's more to life than this. And it proves yet again, the NFL wants in the guys, they draft, they want robots. They want guys who are going to do anything for the team, no matter what. They don't want guys who have a mind of their own. And so that's why you hear the reports before draft being like,

this guy's too smart. And that's actually a thing. Right. I'll put it this way. Ben Rottlesberger is never in danger of thinking about anything besides how he's going to extend this play. Right. Like that's, he's, he's like a dog that gets fixated on a bone and that bone is football. His body is falling apart. And the only reason he would retire is because he hates, uh, uh, who's his name? Todd. Todd Haley. Todd Haley. Right. That's why he retired to spite Todd Haley. Not because his body's falling apart. Yeah. If, if Ben Rottlesberger's nipples fell off before a game, he'd just be like, Oh, well, I gotta go out there and sling it. Right. And see if I can't gut this one out 70 to 14. Like, yeah, you're right. There is an element of like,

yes, Andrew Luck, he is not too smart to play football, but in a way it's like, you can't trick him into playing football any longer than he has. Right. And I, you love, I love from like a per, take it outside of football. You love someone who has the wherewithal to be like, Hey, you know what? Football is not everything. Sports aren't anything. I want my health more than anything else. That's a great move for Andrew Luck because there's a lot of guys who you see hang along, hang around for way too long and their bodies deteriorate. But next time that happens in the combine and the draft process and everyone mocks the guy who's too smart, this is why teams look at it this way. And it's, it might not, you might not agree with

it, but they're saying, we're going to make an investment. We don't want someone who is going to think for themselves and be like, Hey, my health is more important than football as crazy as that sounds. Cause that's actually the way you should think, but not the way NFL teams want their players to think. Exactly. And it also, it's total vindication for Dan Snyder for not drafting Andrew Luck, just to take RG three and the only two words that are sweeter in the English language than mock draft. You know what they are? What? Redraft, redraft. So now we're going to have to go back and redraft to 2012. I'd still take Andrew. Now it's right after their six year bump. So keep that in mind. If they're quarterback Trent Richardson, he's still Hall. He'll be back

for Andrew Luck. He was AAF MVP. Yeah. He won an MVP. Brandon Whedon. Yep. Still slanging it. Luke Keekley. Keekley. I mean, Keekley is like the other end of the spectrum when it comes to guys being like, Hey, maybe my health should be more important than for Luke Keekley's. Luke, he put his body on the line every single week. He's had a million concussions and that's not a knock on Andrew Luck. Some guys will just go through hell and their life will be miserable to play on Sundays. Andrew Luck was like, Hey, I just got married. I have a life. I don't want to do this. Well, then he also say that he almost got divorced. He said like it's got his marriage. Let's hear. Thanks. Yeah, let's go Hank. This isn't much, but this isn't a theory per se,

but he said that the year off that he had rehabbing helped save his marriage. And otherwise, without that year, he probably wouldn't be married. So it leads the question to believe like maybe that marriage being reconciled was part of the reason that he like does Andrew care more about his wife than football. I boom too. That's a bad thing, Andrew. Yeah. Oh, you're in love. Cool. It's just so the whole, the whole thing is shocking. It really is. And it's Jesus never got married. Nope. It turned out fine. He lasts until he was 33. Let me throw another hair brain theory because we're doing the sex ruined Andrew Luck. How much do you put into the fact that he was rapidly balding? And he was like, I don't want to be in the spotlight when I get bald. He saw

Blake Bortles. I don't think Andrew Luck has ever been concerned about his appearance. Yeah. All right. I'm just saying I was, I noticed it even more, more pronounced than usual. He was over compensating with the neck beard. Yes. Man thoughts and prayers, seriously thoughts and prayers to the shitty general Andrew Luck Twitter account. Yes. And what I realized over the weekend is there's an entire ecosystem of civil war general quarterback Twitter accounts out there. There's like a, there's like a corporal Pat Mahomes. They're like every team has that and it's stolen. They stole the entire fucking bit too. That's so and then and then when the lights were the brightest on the civil war Andrew Luck Twitter account, he laid a fucking egg. It's first of all, it took him like 14 hours

to come up with a like 190 character tweet. Fuck you. Like I could have written that tweet in like five minutes. Yeah. And you know, his phone was blowing up too. He's like, Oh my God, he's like sweating his ass off. I gotta have this is my, this is my opus. It is. I need, I need, I need to really respond. And then he was just like, Oh, too smart. I'm retiring and I'm going back to the farm sucks. Yeah. Fuck you. He should have been killed in action. It does suck though from a NFL fan perspective too. Cause Andrew Luck is fun to watch and he's fun to do his goofy thing where he says good hit to everyone. Do you think he regrets that? All the guys that fucked up his injury, you know, like made him injured over the years and made him basically took the love of

football out of his body and he was like, good job, big boy. You think he called up chapter and was like, Hey, that's a great scoop you had. Yeah, I gotta say. Good, good, good scoop, big boy. That was awesome. Scoot. I mean, I am going to miss him. I'm going to miss him. I am too. What do you think his next step is? Cause I think maybe he's an architect. I say he's gonna become a teacher now. He's going to become like a third grade teacher. He's like a big time architect. He's gonna ride his bike to school. Andrew Luck's going to like build a huge building that we know about. Well, I think he loves architecture in Africa, but he's not like an architect. Yeah, but I think he might go. There will be a story in sports illustrated in football. No, sports illustrator won't be around.

There'll be a story in whatever magazine, Bleacher Report hologram, Bleacher Report slideshow that says Andrew Luck. Look at Andrew Luck. He's back at Stanford getting his architecture. I think he's going to move. He's going to move to Europe. He's going to have a bunch of sex and have some kids. Yep. Okay. Nice. All right. So he's going to fuck. Oh, by the way, here's the other thing I thought of on Andrew Lux to do list. Now these retired is fuck bill and then make building in Africa slash Europe. Okay. How pissed do you think Jim Harbaugh is? Oh, very mad. I thought he's so mad right now. He was disgusted when he saw this. Yeah, he probably wasn't too excited about that. You know what Jerry Jones thinks he's going to do? He's going to get Andrew Luck or like a bidding

war with Jerry Jones thinks that Andrew Lux can be president one day. I mean, this whole thing, it's crazy. I really do feel bad for Colts fans. I think they get a bad, obviously the booing was bad, but they get a bad rap because everyone. What Hank? Everyone's just like forgiving Colts fans automatically. Well, no, because I know here's okay, but also okay, here we go. It was Philadelphia. If it was Philadelphia, here's my respect. It was New York. Okay, but he's just as bad. All right. But because it's Indianapolis, people are like, Oh, well, those Colts fans don't mean it. Colts fans are great. No, I think that if it's similar, it's not the same because it's, uh, it's your own guy and booing your own guys weird, but similar to when Kevin Durant

went down in Toronto and everyone like jumped on Toronto fans. I said the same thing. Fans are fans. Fans are crazy. Fans are very passionate. And in the moment, these guys, like the people who booed Andrew Luck are not thinking, wow, he probably has gone through hell to get back and his injuries have taken the, like the love of football away and he's worried if he can even lift his arm in three years. They're thinking we were, we were dark horse Super Bowl contenders now or not. Fuck this. And I'm paying for a shitty preseason game. So I, I'm not excusing it, but I understand like fans. It feels like everyone on Twitter like dumps on fans now and basically says fans don't have a right to be upset. They don't have a right to say

Andrew Luck owes them anything, but they have every right to be like, you know what, this really sucks. Our guy is retiring. Right. They do. They just probably should have booed him. No, they should not have booed him. I'm saying they should not have booed him, but I also understand we're all allowed to have feelings. Instant reaction. As somebody that just saw the trailer for the Mr. Rogers movie over the weekend, we're all allowed to have feelings and we need to work on constructive ways to deal with our feelings. And you can sing a song. You can play all the low notes on the piano all at once, but maybe don't boo Andrew Luck as he's balding and walking off the field. If Andrew Luck had announced he was retiring on Wednesday and then they booed him

on Saturday. I'd be like, that's totally different. Premeditated booing is different. That's totally different. This was an instant reaction and it's not good and I'm not excusing it, but I also understand fans are crazy. Word was trickling through the crowd that night. Like, remember when Bin Laden got shot and it was Sunday night baseball and everybody was like telling each other? Yes. John Cena should have come out and announced it to the crowd and that way he would have taken the booze. And then when it came time for Andrew Luck to walk off, it would have been fine. I think they would have, they all want to take it back for the most part. Right. Like there's probably a handful of cold sand. Hank gets mad about that. Okay. How about this,

Hank? How about? I'm just saying Boston, New York, Philadelphia, all would have been received way worse. You guys would have been like classic Boston, classic Philadelphia, classic New York. Hang up a banner at Lucas Oil. I think it's different in Indianapolis. That says Andrew Luck didn't retire for seven years. Put that next to the 2014 AFC finalist. That's the second to get him that far anyway. So it's like, you're not even losing that much. He had the second. He was the second most TDs in the first six seasons in NFL history behind Dan Marino. We're current guest Dan Marino. I don't know. I just think that if you look at Twitter and this might be fighting my own straw man, everyone dumps, everyone has the same take. Andrew Luck

didn't know you anything. We know that. That's stating the obvious. Andrew Luck doesn't owe us anything. Of course not. But how about the fact that fans can be upset because most of these people like live and die with their teams. How much do you think he's going to freak out when he gets his first iPhone now that he's retired? Oh man. Because he's going to be bored for a while. Maybe that's why he retired. He's like, I need at least two months to figure out this iPhone technology. When his wife gets him the first iPhone because she's like, listen, we have to be able to text and do all this stuff. This is very tough on our marriage right now because you don't have an iPhone. I'm sick of these fucking green bubbles popping up all the time. His mind is going to be blown.

It's going to be like Bob Dylan taking acid for the first time. Yes. What other things we have about it? The only other things I had was Chris Ballard now has a job for life because he basically gets stuck with a terrible situation. And now he can basically say, well, Andrew Luck retired. Is it a terrible situation though? Is it? What do you mean? Jacobi Brissette? No, no. I'm saying he basically gets like five more years now because when you if your franchise quarterback retires at age 29, you can basically say, well, I didn't see that one coming. Well, what's going to happen is Brissette's going to play above his expectations and then we want to take in chargers taking the over on their season total right now. I think it's at eight and a no six,

six, six and a half. I'm taking the over on that big time. And then Brissette's going to get like eight wins out of them. Cash a big paycheck somewhere else. Kelly comes in, sucks it up next year or takes into Super Bowl. One or the other. There's no middle ground with swag. And then after that, they have Trevor Lawrence. Yeah. So boom, true. Bad a boom, bad a bing, culture back. And then we had OJ hop in, which is just the weirdest part of it's the weirdest part of Twitter at this point is that OJ Simpson, like in the best part about OJ Simpson is he thinks that all these fantasy football jokes are funny. Like this is someone told him that fantasy football exists. I don't think he realized it until a month ago. And he's just everything's framed in fantasy.

He was mad because he had just drafted allegedly, who is, which is also, there's a lot of legend. A lot of make sure to use the A word around anything OJ does. Yeah. So he's pissed off that he drafted Andrew Luck in fancy football like five minutes before he retired. Allegedly. That that would have to mean that Andrew Luck would be the only person to ever be on OJ's can't cut list. Yes. Yes. Pretty much. Yeah. He's just like, fuck, this is the one guy that I can't go after. Yeah. Yeah. God damn it. And man, he did it in a t-shirt and we're watching it right now. It's so, yeah, it's just a weird story. I don't know. I'd say it's a weird story. I'm, I feel like Andrew Luck, like good for him, but man, it's weird. Well, we also talked about last week

or our idea for a law firm. Yes. I think we should bring that back up because maybe, hey, Andrew, why don't you use some of that 25 million in, in loose change that you got from Jim Mercer to just refund some of your fantasy owners? By the way, this is just more point towards don't do your fantasy draft until like the second before the season kicks off because you'll just, this will always happen. I don't understand the people who do fantasy drafts in like early August. You're just asking for it. Agreed. Yeah. All right. Go check out barstoolgold.com slash PMT Andrew Whitworth. We talked to him in person in the van. New sign. New sign in front of us right now. Only barstoolgold people have it. Barstoolgold.com could be on the sign

slash it's crazy. Anything else that we want to talk about Andrew Luck? I think that's it. I mean, it totally hijacked week zero. That was kind of fucked up shifter. It did. Although the Miami Florida game was really bad. It was pretty bad. It was a matter of like who had the ball last was going to lose. And it was great too because it was so bad, but then it broke all the records for people watching it, which people like, man, we shouldn't do week zero. These teams aren't ready. No, no, no, we should do week zero because everyone wants football. Yeah. No, week zero, just the branding of it is fucking sweet. The University of Florida is awesome in August. There's no doubt about that. Yeah. It's just when you get into like September,

May and then late October, they start playing well again. Bringing the U back. Michael Irvin. Oh, dude, how about the touchdown knuckles? Not only the turnover chain came back, the touchdown knuckles. And having that old super old lady being the turnover chain like holder was nice. Yes. And I don't know if you guys saw. And there's two bubbles on Miami. Yeah, two bubbles on Miami. Same number. Michael Irvin versus Tim Tebow in like a trash talk fest was the most lopsided thing I've ever watched. Yeah, unreal. Tim Tebow was just like, look at Gator Nation. Michael Irvin was like, fuck you, Tim Tebow. Suck my dick. Tim started a bigger cocaine line than your whole body, you bitch. He's like Gator Nation everywhere in Florida. I'll show you a gator, Tim. All right,

so let's do who's back and then we'll do our Mount Rushmore. Hank, why don't you start with who's back? My who's back. I have a few. The first one is Breaking Bad. Oh, yeah. We reported this a few times on the show. He got cocked by Andrew Locke. I reported them as back and then I said they was not back because he was starting a tequila company thought it was fake news. Turns out they were just filming the whole time they released the trailer. It's coming out in the fall, Breaking Bad movie following the season finale. So I'm very excited about that. Very excited. Best show in the history of television. It's going to be awesome. My who's back is college football names. Yeah. Okay. College football names. Best part of the like it being back, just the random names

that some of these teams have. There's Manly Williams on Arizona. No, Hawaii. He won the game for Hawaii. Dude, don't go to the island and expect to leave with a win. Al Blades Jr. on Miami. Yeah. And then they had the two Bubba's. Well, that's Benny Blades's son. Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah. No, there'll be Al Blades's son if he's a junior. Oh, yeah. So Benny Blades is nephew. Benny Blades is nephew. Yeah. It's just a great name. Yeah. The Blades. And then the two Bubba's that had the same number. Bubba Bax had Bubba Bolden. What numbers? What numbers? Yeah. 21. All right. Bubba, you have to wear 21 on the average jersey that you get. That's officially the Bubba number. You got it. All right. You wrote that down? I didn't see a pen in your hand.

Here you go. Okay. You want a pen? All right. Here. You want a piece of paper too? There you go. Just write that 21. We'll wait to go with the rest of the show until you write that Bubba's writing it down. Uniform number 21. 21. All right. That's it. Got it. Okay. All right. That's it. Good. My who's back the week is Peaky Blinders. Yeah. The Peaky Fulkin Blonde is. I got to watch the show. I got to watch the show. Yeah. You got it. By the way, a little life hack to just improve your experience. Not a life hack. Use everyone's hack. Yeah. Just put on closed caption. Yeah. Just throw on closed captioning. It'll be a lot better. And then the rest of your life you'll just do it for everything. And for every show,

now I use it for Mind Hunter. Yeah. So like now I don't understand the English language anymore because I've got to just read it. No, it's not. It's not. But Peaky Blonde is back and JJ Watt was asking if anybody has an illegal stream. So JJ, if you can't afford Netflix, then maybe we have some issues with your money management. I don't know. JJ. So related. We're at that $55,000 check or $69,000 check that we gave you. Huh? Interesting. Not to your Netflix account. Good question. My other who's back of the week is Burning Man. So Burning Man is happening this week. I don't know what Burning Man is, but it's like Coachella, except more naked. I think Burning Man is not cool anymore though. I think Burning Man was before Coachella. But they're

making it cool. They're making it cool again because I read they went corporate. They went corporate, but now they're pulling it back. Now it's like, okay, you're camping out in tents and we're just going to have orgies the entire week. There are 40 orgies that are scheduled this week. See, once you schedule an orgy, don't show up to a scheduled orgy. You got like a calendar notification. Well, if you show up to a scheduled orgy, it's going to be six dudes and one girl because everyone, every dude, it's like going to firefest and be like, there's going to be so many models there. It's going to be so awesome. And then it's just a bunch of finance bros from New York who are a little overweight. I'm just saying there are 40 orgies that are scheduled

this week at Burning Man. Yeah. Don't show up. Little life hack. Don't show up to a scheduled orgy. Orgies just happen. They have to happen. That's too many orgies, even if they just happened. You can't fulfill 40 orgies. You can't schedule sex like that. Yeah. Takes all the love out of it. And then, well, Hank took my other who's back of the week, which was, which was Breaking Bad. Oh, nice. All right. My who's back is Dave Chappelle because it was his birthday and New Special. Yeah. No, no, no. And, and Desmond Howard said, does Desmond Howard have to choke a bitch on game day? Yeah, which is the Wayne Brady joke. Michigan Man. Yeah. I didn't know we were bringing back those jokes. If you, if you were in college or right out of college when Chappelle

show was on, you probably heard a million people yelling, what? Okay. Lee Corsa has been doing the what from John for the last four years. I'm Rick James, bitch. And so yeah, Desmond Howard, little tip. Don't use jokes like that that like are 15 years old and no one understands except people who are over the age of 30. When you just say, does Desmond Howard have to choke a bitch? I knew what he was saying, but I feel like there are a lot of people who had no idea what he was saying. And he thought he nailed it. Right. Trey. That's a Trey Wingo. Trey Wingo is like, let's leave this to the pros that know how to get away with saying stuff without saying stuff. Yes. Yes. So that's the latest quickly Desmond. Yeah. And, and game days back, which is great.

Game day is so awesome. So dude is well. Yeah. I mean, Lee's going through some tough times, but it's, he's got a job. Was that what you just called being old? No, he had a stroke. I know, but he's now like it's, I love Lee Corso, but it's at the point now where we should figure out a role that doesn't expose him. I think it's kind of sweet though, going to see Kirk Herbstree. It's the only time that I like Kirk Herbstree is when he's being legalized or is like guide and is almost like, I don't want to say seeing eye dog, but he's like helping him with the legend. He's helping him with his sentences and like finishing his thoughts for him. And that's the only time that I will ever like Kirk Herbstree is when he's lending a hand

like that. But I'll say this, like waking up on Saturday morning to game day was such a great feeling. Yeah, I saw your tweet and I made me so fucking mad because, because I don't sleep in anymore and you're, and you're sleeping till 10 o'clock. Yeah. It's a 34 year old. I'm like, what the fuck? I said, that's like my, my body's version of a dog sensing an earthquake is just waking up at 9 59 on a Saturday and turning it up. And then a bunch of people replied to me. They were like, they're like, Hey, congrats on being a 34 year old waking up at 10 o'clock. Yes. Yeah. That's yeah. I saw it and I was just like, fuck, I've been up. But isn't it? Yeah, it's such a good feeling just waking up. And you're so the nice thing is you're refreshed.

Yeah, I usually sleep through it. That's my thing. Yeah, you always sleep through it. Right. Yeah, you could just, I used to do that Hank. I used to wake up to the Tom Rinaldi music. I'm just worried about getting my bets in before the game starts. Now he wakes up right before it. Yeah. Because I don't have a kid. Yeah. 34 waking up at 9 59. That's nice. It is very nice. All right. We have breaking news, by the way. Breaking news. Peter King dropped his adieu haiku. I saw that. Yeah. He wrote just my opinion. Football was tormenting luck. He had to get out. Good one, Peter King. Your poetry is shitty. Fuck off. Dude. That breaking moves was brought to you by chocolate milk. Keep counting. For real recovery. That tastes real good.

God damn it. I, you know, I'll be honest with you. The Andrew Luck retirement wasn't real until we got the Peter King adieu. The adieu haiku. That's, that has concluded every column Peter's written for the last like 25, 30 years. He'd been thinking about that all day. Yeah. He's just like, God, I nailed this haiku. Everyone's been waiting. I'm surprised he didn't make a reference to the Civil War Andrew Luck guy. That, that was the pinnacle of comedy to Peter King. Jesus Christ. He's got a beard. All right. Let's do our Mount Rushmore before we do that. Bud Light guys. Bud Light football season. We're back. AWLs. When it's football season, the crisp fall air returns. There's no better time to enjoy a crisp bud light. You know,

we know it. Look, Bud Light could spend a whole 60 second ad read talking about its crisp taste. You notice how I said crisp, but rather than stating the obvious, Bud Light thought it'd be fun to give a small business the remaining 30 seconds they're at. Whoa, I didn't know this. All right. That's right. America's favorite logger is giving your small business the chance to be heard on America's favorite podcast. Is that us? Is he talking about us? Yeah. Thanks, sir. Fuck yes. But Bud Light just can't, can't just pay for anyone to promote their business to be eligible. Your ad read must include the words crisp and bud light. For example, be sure to check out Hank's barber shop. Hank's satisfaction guarantee means that every customer leaves with crisp,

clean haircut. That's sure to get compliments while grabbing a bud light with friends. So direct message your script or tweet at Bud Light using the hashtag Bud Light Small Biz on Twitter or Instagram for a chance to be featured during a PMT ad read. Good luck to all the AWLs from your friends at Bud Light. That's actually a sick deal. So tweet at Bud Light or DM them, use the hashtag, hashtag Bud Light Small Biz with a Z on Twitter or Instagram and you can get an ad read on here. That's sick. All right. Mount Rushmore of guess we want on this show. This is going to be a good one. This is great. So what order? I go first and who's second? Hank. And then Hank's second. You ready for this, Hank? You prepared? Let's do it. Okay. My first pick.

Look at his face. I got to go Tom Brady. Tom is one of those guys that like everything about him all time has been just like this guy wins. He knows some secret sauce. I'm sure he'd be a very electric like really enticing personality to kind of get to know a little bit better. Because as us Patriots fans know about him, he's a winner. Okay. He wins and he's got some secret sauce. And I think he'd be just a great guest, probably the goat guest. Did you know that was coming? No, I mean, I kind of did you have money on your list? Yeah. Are you sure? Let me see your list. He's at the top. I'm not gonna show you the rest of it. Okay. Okay. Tom Brady is my number one pick. Good pick, P.F. Thanks. Don't you think it'd be good? It would be good. Me and Big Cat

have been talking about getting Tom Brady on for a while. It would be great. All right, Hank, go. He's trying to think of a good red skin, but there aren't any. Yeah, exactly. I guess I'll just go with Eddie Grant. Good one. Electric Avenue. We tried to hunt him down for Barclay Van Talk and it was like, yeah, he doesn't have a cell phone or an email or anything. Yep. I followed him on Facebook. I still get his updates sometimes, but I just think it'd be hilarious to have on the show. Okay. Eddie Grant would be a good guest. Yeah. All right. Just have him say, Oi, I'll go with, well, I mean, I think this guy is going to come on, but I'll go with Kevin Durant as my first pick. I think he is going to come on, but I really, really want him to come on.

But not in a creepy, we're trying to like get him on way. No, we're trying to get him off. Yeah. Yeah. Actually, yeah. Forget it, dude. Whatever. I don't get you off, Kevin. And then my second pick is going to be Cardi B. That'd be awesome. That'd be awesome. That'd be awesome. As everyone knows, I'm a big Cardi B guy. So Big Cat knew I was going to take Tom Brady so he absolutely planned to take. You were going to take Cardi B? Yeah. She's on my list. Oh, okay. Well, I took Cardi B. Good. I hope she drugs you. I hope so too. Richard Petino. Oh, good pick. Second pick. That was your second one. That'd be a quick one. Here's my 13 second one. Nice. Okay. Okay. My next one. Can't believe you made this far.

Boomer, Chris Berman. Yeah. I think he'll be on the show eventually. Okay. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know about that. If you build it, they will come. It's one of those situations for Boomer. Yeah. It's a race for who? I take that back. What? Say it. Go ahead. No. Go ahead, Hank. I mean, I don't know. We'll see. The fantasy football podcast? No, between him being alive and coming on the show. Oh, damn, man. No, that was fucked up. Come on, Hank. Shit. I said I didn't want to say it. Dude, we got Tommy LaSorder. He's still alive. Yeah. That's messed up, Hank. All right. So my next one. But if it hasn't happened this point in life. Yeah. I see what you're saying. I think we just put out like a nice buffet for him. Just like

always have a nice spread ready for him and just he'll make his way here eventually by happenstance. Yes. He'll be like Pepe Lapue floating on the nose of the cured meats. Yeah. So next one, I'm going to go with Roger Goodell. I think Roger Goodell wouldn't even know if I'd want him. I would absolutely take Roger. He'd be such a fucking wet blank. He wouldn't answer any questions. And you wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't be able to ask him the tough question. Why not? Because he would do the fucking mic, the mic and mic thing. Like, all right, here are the questions beforehand. Roger, ever think about going to an 18 week schedule? Hey, Roger, what do you think about letting the guy smoke a little reefer? And then he would just be like, well,

we're thinking about this and we're thinking about that. And then it would be an interview. Yeah. But it would be great because we could fuck with him. We could pour water on him and see if he's a robot. We could, we could, dude, he would have bring us all this security. Those mic and mic interviews with Roger Goodell were so bad every year. I think he does it with someone every year. I think we would just have to like corner him and not let like physically bully him into a corner and make him answer our questions until until either his goons kicked our asses or we got what we wanted. I mean, let him go. I think, I think no matter what, if Roger Goodell came on the show, it would be appointment listening.

I don't know. I think I just know watching him do those interviews when he does that one. Hey, Roger Goodell, we got, we got 10 minutes with the commissioner every, every year, whoever has a Super Bowl gets it. Yeah. And it's always so terrible. Yeah. All right. Hank, your second, third pick. There's a lot. This is a tough, tough thing to boil down. And little, we're not to tell everyone what to do, but we're trying to get these people. So then go tell them to come on. Greenie. Oh, good one. Good pick. And Roger. He could do the Roger Goodell interview. We could, yeah, use him as a surrogate. I'll just sit there with my hand up Greenie's ass, like a puppet moving his mouth and then get him to ask you all the tough questions for me.

Okay. Greenie would, Greenie would be a good one. He is in, in the neighborhood. He lives not too far from our office. So I've never seen him. I've seen him twice at the Starbucks at our old office. Never met him. It was right by there. He might not even exist. He said, he said the parody songs remind him of Mike and Mike. Yeah, I love it. It's like, cool. I'm going to go fucking walk in front of a boss. All right. All right. I'm not going to help. I don't care. Okay. My next pick. I'll go with, I'll go with two quarterbacks for my last two picks. Aaron Rodgers being one because we are the biggest package podcast. Yeah. And Big Ben would be, I don't know what would happen if we interviewed Big Ben,

but holy shit. That would be, if we walked in with walking boots, Big Ben, Aaron, those would be very different because Aaron Rodgers is smart enough where I think he would be able to hang and Big Ben, I think we would just make fun of him for 20 minutes where thing going over his head and he would just be like, what's going on? But he would also be able to hang because he wouldn't get it. Right. Right. Right. He'd walk out and be like, like he remember the time he took the concussion test? Yeah. And he's like, I nailed it. And they're like, no, Big Ben, you got a concussion. Yeah. He'd walk out and be like, man, those guys are awesome. We really ripped. Yep. And we just roasted him the whole time. Yeah. Remind me of just being

in a locker room going back and forth with the guys. All right. That conversation, the bouncy twins a couple of times. Hank, your fourth pick. I guess I'll go because I think it'd be a great interview, but the Joe Budden and like his whole podcast gang would be a great collaboration in our guy. Yeah. Third best rapper of all time. Yep. Joe. That's true. That's true. All right. My last one. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. All right. I'm going to go with Guy Fieri. Okay. I think that guy would be a great guy to have on the show. He would be a guy's guy. Yeah. Football guy's guy. Guy. A guy's guy. We could talk to him about the Raiders. We could talk about donkey sauce. Yeah. Talking about the time I snuck into his party and broke his toilet. Yeah. Just anything.

Oh, the sky's the limit with Guy Fieri. Yeah. All right. What got left off the list? I had skipping Stephen A. Yes. Stephen A. Andrew Luck. Larry David. Trump. We sort of had on once. Wow, dude. Stick to sports. Yeah. Oh, I would like to have woke Peter King on. So since he's told everyone that he will never come back on, I'd like to have him back on as woke Peter King and just talk about the merits of serial rapist Darren Sharper going to the Hall of Fame for 30 minutes. I like that. Obama for ratings. Yeah. For ratings. Sports, bro. What about Hilldog and Trump at the same time? Oh, good. Get the gang back together. Yeah. Just see how we can recapture about 2016. Yeah, the 2016 Magic that they shared. Ben Affleck and Matt Damon together would be

funny. That would be good. Steve Jobs. Yep. We should have him on. Give him a call. Tweet at Steve Jobs. Kauai. I would love to have Kauai just because it would be one of those things either. We would be the guys who made Kauai cool or he would be so robotic like where we'd walk out and be like, you know what? That's it. That's who he is. There's nothing else there. That's how it would go. Yeah. Oh, yeah. KG would be another one. KG would be good. Yeah. DMX. DMX would be good. Just bark at him. What do you don't think so, Hank? I don't think that would go over well. Yeah. I think DMX would be an awesome guess. DMX performed at like a Westchester, like a mall. No. Oh, no. Who did you see? I saw Buster Rimes. Buster Rimes. Yeah. He performed for 12 minutes and then left

and took steroids. Dog the bounty hunter. Yeah. He'd be great. We'd love to have him on. Air Bud. Just another dog. Yep. Danny Boy Kane. We don't say his name, but hopefully he'll come on sometime. Jim Tomsula. Tomsula. I had him on my list too. Jerry Jones. Yep. Just throw back some Johnny Walker blue with him. Jerk off in a couple shoes. Get drunk. Play Limp Biscuit with a set of loafers. All right. So give us, everyone go get us these people, please. Also, Drake. I mean, would love to just talk to Drake as a fan of his music and his lyrics. I would love to see you be like to Drake's face. You don't have bangers. I would be like, no, I listen that line. Imagine if I never met the homies. Is that it? Fuck. Dude, that's like, that's next level stuff.

That's like, I mean, we're talking Dylan taking acid. That's, that's Dylan hopped up on like bath salts. Imagine prime. Imagine. It's true though. It's like Bob Dylan makes an imagined yeah. What if we never met? Imagine that's what I'm saying. It's great. But you're mocking it. No, I'm not. I'm saying it's so good. You're mocking it. Imagine. That's a mock. That was a mock. I think it's a fucking wizardly line. That was a mock. You just did. It's really good. Brett Farve. Farve would be good. Farve. I got notice game on not texting him. Yeah. Who else to have? Giada. I had Giada on here too, actually. You just want to look at her tits. That's gross. I don't. I don't want to look at her tits. Do you want to cook with her? I want to cook. I want her to cook

with me. Don't. That's so misogynistic. Why? Do you just want to look at her tits? Oh, I thought you meant like kitchen stuff. No, no, no. That's your job. Yeah. Giada. Salt Bay. Salt Bay. Salt Bay. Fuck Salt Bay. I fucking hate Salt Bay. I'm trying to think who else? Anyone else? I'm still team Salt Bay. Doug Ford. You just talk about Rob. Remember your brother? That's not a bad idea. I bet you out of everyone we just listed, he's probably supposed to attainable. We could probably just email him and he'd be like, yup, and Doug Ford's definitely. Oh, Adam Sandler. Oh, Adam Sandler is a good one. Damn, Adam Sandler would have. That's a really good one. All right. Let's get to our interview with the Amazon Rainforest. They're hot right now. Jeff Bezos. Yeah. Just

see how horny he actually is. I'm going to regret saying that because he controls all of our brains. Also, Jack from Twitter. Jack several ideas. He did a bunch of podcasts. I know, not ours. Yeah. Fuck that. Cubes. Didn't he do? Didn't Jack did do Bitcoin Marty's podcast? What the fuck? This whole world that we live in is just insane. Our Bitcoin guy who definitely not anymore. No, because we all lost money. The Bitcoin craze that swept Barstool in 2017. Oh, problematic. But yes, I would. Yes, I would like to interview. Maybe we could do via Skype. No, no, no, no. We actually had it. We were offered. I don't even think that was real, but someone, some ad who was not named the name of the beer company was like, Hey,

what if we had you guys pick up OJ from jail? And we're like, yeah. Also, these are like as the ESPN thing was like falling apart too. Yeah. It never actually happens. We never were actually to the point where we had to sit down and be like, Hey guys, should we interview OJ? But yeah, that was a weird one. Where you got? I'm not. No, I'm just agreeing with you that no one OJ firm. No. Yeah. Okay. Let's do our interview with Andrew Whitworth. Before we do that, there's a new dating app out there. It's called ship. Here's how it works. If you're single, you sign up, invite friends who can match for you. And even if you aren't single, you can still join to help a friend out. 60% of the people

on there are women. So your odds are great. It's like the inverse of Purdue University. So go right now, check it out. The new dating app. It's called ship. Finding a date is more fun when you do it with your friends. Download the ship dating app. It starts swiping today. You don't even have to be single. You can just be out there just trying to be a wingman for your bro. Do it right now at ship SHIP. Check it out. 60% of the people on there are women and you can sign up. If you're single, if you're not single, sign up with your friends ship right now. SHIP. It's the new dating app. Okay. Here he is. Future Hall of Famer, Andrew Whitworth. Okay. We now welcome on Andrew Whitworth. He's the largest man I've ever met.

You also do way too much charity. Thank you. Okay. Because I wanted to talk about the charity to set the stage here and I've never seen someone who does so much charity. You do play 60. You do I Have a Dream Foundation. You do United Way Homewalk Captain. First quarter for literacy and read across America Day. Why haven't you done anything for the dogs? Puppies. Talking puppies. You hate animals? We're talking puppies. You know what? I mean, I feel like every year I try to add something to the repertoire and I think we just, you know, eventually I guess we got to add an animal. Yeah. It sounds like I'm kind of against the animals. Yes. Right. Two dogs or cats next. Well, probably dogs. We live in a society where if you are.

No, well, kind of. I'm anti cat in a way. I think that cats are more scrappy. They can find their ways. Dogs need homes. Cats can just live on the streets. But we live in a society where people would actually look at him and be like, this guy, he does so much charity, but he doesn't do this, but it's actually very commendable. So thank you for everything you do. What's your favorite? Ooh. Or what's the one that you spend the most time with? Like you're, do you have an Andrew Whitwood charity? Well, I mean, for the most part kids, I mean, so elementary schools, like just go on a visit and try to encourage them and just, you know, I think it's fun, always go and it never fails that they have the best questions and can put you on the spot more

than anybody. That's true. My first media event when I got back from the Super Bowl was I went and visited a school and I would say that was harder than any media day. They kind of laid it on me. So probably smarter questions overall. They're like, Hey, what the hell happened on offense? Yeah, I mean, it's literally how it went. I literally walked in the classroom, you know, it's one of, this is the life of an old lineman, right? I call it QB life when I'm talking about Jared and Todd and these guys, you know, just the big time, prime time life. So for, for an old lineman, right, I walk into the classroom, how y'all doing guys? I can announce myself, tell them what I do, you know, from the Rams, how you do when I get three, three statements, three hands

raised, like, Hey, raise a hand if you want to ask me something. One, where's Todd Gurley? Two is Jared coming. No, he's not coming. It's just me guys. Three, why'd y'all lose? Yeah, I'm like, you know what, I'm glad I'm here to see you guys today. Nobody wants me to be here. And all y'all want to know is why I'm losing. Okay. So when they asked you, why'd you guys lose? Did you tell them? Because everybody's going to die. Yeah, we're all going to die. I did. I told him, you know what, I told him, here's the truth. You guys have good days and bad days at school. You have days where you come in and just things don't go right. You get bad on the conduct list. You do bad in your test. And you have days where you come in, you light it up. And the reality is,

is no matter what, the next day's the most important day. So how you handle it? I think you were kind of a victim of what happens a lot with the media where we take a quote and tweet it. Yeah. And then it's one line and no context and no one watches the video. So when we see the line, Rams lose Superbowl. Andrew Whitworth says, well, we're all going to die someday. I think we actually talked about it on our show and joked about it. But it was clearly, there was a deeper meaning to it. Yeah, I actually said they had asked me some questions about Superbowl. And then a guy asked me, he said, Hey, if you're retiring and this is it, like your career is over, you know, like, how do you deal with having not won a Superbowl? And my actual quote was like, I don't care how

many Superbowls or awards I've won. Like the truth is like, you know, one day all of us are going to die. And it's really about how I live my life. Like every single day, you know, am I a person that nobody wants to be around? Am I somebody who's self absorbed and I don't care about people around me and people would say, Hey, man, you know what, that dude's won a lot of things, but God, he's kind of a jerk. Doesn't care about the dogs. Yeah, I don't care about the dogs apparently. Right. You know, if I died, people are gonna be like, I just got hated animals. Yeah, right. What was his problem? Basically Corral de Vil. But that's the truth. It's like, it's one of those things to me. It's like, man, I'd rather, you know what, handle myself the right way than worry about

trophies and accolades. You have a very comforting voice too. Southern. Yeah. It's nice. Like you could tell me. Are you gonna be like just kind of like ASMR? Am I like a yoga instructor? Like almost like making yoga. That's for often to lie here. Speaking of your voice, New Orleans or Louisiana native went to LSU. You guys beat the saints in the NFC championship game and then you went and said it was an excuse that the saints said that. Do you just plan on never living in New Orleans again? No, I mean, I said what I said, I think, you know, at the end of the day, you know, being a Louisiana guy, we, we love each other and we disagree a lot. And you know what? All I said was that it's just an excuse to blame one moment. And that's the truth. You know,

the reality is, as I've said before, if they were winning the game at the moment, or if that play would have ended the game, then that would be a valid argument. But the truth of the matter was the game was tied. We've all seen miss field goals. We've all seen missed extra points. We've all seen kicks not go in. So you know what? You can't say that you for sure won the game. It's interesting. You played when you were at LSU, you played for Nick Saban, right? What was he like as a coach? You know what? I think he's one of those people that I really attribute a lot of things that as a pro that I've learned and how I carry myself and things. He's one of those guys that at times you might not get along with just because he's pretty hard on you. But you know

what? At the end of the day, you value what it means to work hard and dedicate yourself to something and have a passion and to be really relentless each day about pursuing that passion. Because, I mean, his intensity level, really, man, is second to nobody. Does he smile? You know what? He does smile. You got to talk to him either about his pontoon boat or his lake. You know, and at that time, a little bit golf, you know, you can sometimes you get him in a good mood about golf. Just talking about his boat. Just please don't bring up anything about success. If you do that, it's over with. That's poison. That's rap poison. You can't talk about success. You talk about winning the game. I'll never forget him. Our ring introduction, after we won our first

NASCAR championship, he told us we could put him somewhere the sun didn't shine when he gave him to us. So that's kind of my memory. I'll never forget him. What was his office like? Does he actually have trophies set up or is it just blank walls? No, I think he's got some memorabilia stuff. I think you know what? Honestly, he probably doesn't know because he probably doesn't care what's on the wall. Those details don't matter. Yeah. She probably sets all that up. That's important. And you know what? The only details he probably matters to him is that he has a good, good solid big chair because he's big sports philosophy guy. So he probably has a really big chair and some little tiny chairs for you to sit in just so you kind of keep that templing mentality.

Outside of that, he probably doesn't care what's in there. So you blocked for Jermakas Russell at LSU. Were you surprised that it didn't go the way that everyone kind of expected it to in the pros for him? Well, I think anytime you talk about the quarterback position, it's tough. I mean, there's a lot to learn. That sounded really professional. It did. And you know what? You saw it politically correct on you, didn't you? And anytime you talk about the quarterback position, it's tough. It's an extremely hard position to be successful at. He had a lot of extra unreal arm talent. I got to see that firsthand. I'll never forget when he was a rookie. I mean, a rookie, a freshman in college, we would make him every Friday. We had

our walkthrough. We'd make him throw a football from the end zone line just as soon as he walked through the polls there on the game field. And that sucker throw at 80 yards, just no warm-up, you know, just wing it. And it was special to see him. His arm talent was unreal. And listen to just stories about Jermakas Russell's arm arm. One knee hit the crossbar from six yards out. You know, I kind of would like to see him be like a major league starting pitcher. I mean, I bet he would have thrown some gas. Yeah, some real gas. So I want to talk about the quarterback position, how hard it is. Jared Goff, in that Saints game, I thought was like his kind of, not coming of age, but like he had a bad start and then put it all back

together. Can you tell in the huddle, like a guy like Jared, when it's like it clicks back on, he's like, all right, he feels comfortable now. He's going to be able to get us to a win here. And also just so you know, we're like best friends with Jared, so don't say anything mean. Don't say anything mean. Nothing you would. That's the question. No. Yeah. Now, you know, with Jared, it's honestly, it's one of those things that's always impressive about him is really his poise and calm. I mean, he's a guy that even when games don't go that great for him, you kind of see him as a guy that like trust that it's going to come back. He can make that one throw. Like he doesn't really ever get shelled up to where you see some guys kind of get nervous

and they get kind of apprehensive with the ball. You kind of can see that even in his bad games or a game where things just don't go his way at first. He has that almost that, you know, shooter's mentality of like, Hey, I'm going to catch one hundred a minute and I'm going to make the perfect shot or the perfect throw and I'm going to get right back on track. And that's how he handled that game. Except when it's cold. Big cat thinks he can't play in the cold. I mean, I saw his face. I asked him this, we were with him on Sunday. I asked him to his face. He's like, dude, you were basically crying in Chicago. Like he was, he was cold. He's a Cali kid. Well, he is a Cali kid, but I don't know if he was cold and crying, but maybe it wasn't like a cry cry.

It was the like, you know, when it gets really cold, you get a little teary eyed just because it's cold. It was that. Yeah. So what do you think we're going to do? Like getting like a flame, like a heat suit? Well, I think after that one, like he'll get, he'll get used to it. But, you know, the first couple of really cold ones for Cali guys is something Blake is also a good friend of ours. He's he didn't know he didn't see snow until like two years ago. Yeah. Yeah. So we could patent like a quarterback heat suit. Yeah. Like when Tom Brady wears the wet suit underneath. Yeah. Yeah. Or just tell him to do it like an office alignment does and just not wear any sleeves at all. You look warmer. If you're not wearing sleeves, then quite as important.

Oh, yeah, I do. I work hard. Damn. No, here's not as tough as you look. Hold on. Here's how to define it. I'll wear sleeves. If I ever wear sleeves, I'll wear sleeves the entire season. Oh, that's such a sneaky move by you. Like I'll wear it through camp. Damn. Like, you know, that's a dirt dog move. What do you know this year? You sleep guy this year? Sleep guy this year. This year. Damn it. Yeah. Wow. We can't pick you out. I gotta, I gotta be, you know, I gotta be careful. Just the, you know, the rays out here, too much golf. I gotta keep, you know, some protection. Yeah. Yeah. I read somewhere that you try to change one thing every off season. Like you try different way to push yourself to try to break yourself a little bit. What's this off season?

You know, this off season, it's been honestly pushing myself in a little bit of mobility and, and, you know, really, I've kind of been a guy who I like to do things where it's like, hey, I'm going to go see if I can backpack with some heavy backpacks up a mountain or I want to go, you know, sled pushing or I want to just find, you know, track crossfitting or I want to try MMA or whatever it is. And this off season is like, you know what, at this point in my career, like I need to be taking care of myself. So one of the big challenges for myself this off season is, it's been like mobility, taking care of my body, trying to find ways to make sure I keep my flexibility and keep moving and everything properly. And, and it's been fun. Like yoga,

some yoga stuff, but honestly, just in my training, like, right, you know, what making sure technique wise, everything that I do, I'm moving in good ways, good postures, all that type stuff and a lot of flexibility in the hips and ankles and just keeping those things good and good to go, man. In case I want to play to 40. We were just hanging out with Jake laser earlier. He said he could kick your ass. Do you have a comment? Um, well, I mean, you know what? He is the right height to be able to kick my actual ass. You know what I'm saying? Like he's working. Yeah, yeah, you know, but he could probably kiss it. Now, you know, as far as actually like beating me up, I'm not sure he could reach my head. So

true. It would be hard to, you know, always tell him though, me and him are, you know, we're coming back twins part two. Yeah. And it's going to be special. So you just said something there. You want to maybe play to 40? Well, I mean, offensive linemen, it's incredible that you are playing at the age you are right now. You're thinking 40. Well, I mean, I just don't ever think in endings. So it's kind of like, Hey, you know what? If I, I'm enjoying this game and I like the game, I'm going to keep playing the game. And if I feel good and I can play at a high level, uh, you know what, we're going to keep riding. So do you think it will be like, you know, one, one season will end and it will be like,

All right, you know what? I just don't feel like playing anymore. Yeah. I think for me, it'll be the commitment to how my body feels and whether I feel like I can keep, you know, honestly, the off season is just, uh, it's big for me. I mean, just, uh, my age, being able to get back to the strength and flexibility I need to play well. And so yeah, I think one year I'll end the season and go, you know what, there's no way I'm putting myself through all that again. It's too much pain, too much stuff to go through. And, and, uh, this is it. But you feel good right now. Feel great. If you had, if you had won the Super Bowl, would that have calculated into your equation of whether or not to come back?

No, I mean, I told my wife this, because my wife was, you know, I kind of honestly going into the week, she kind of thought maybe I might would retire. And I told her this during the week, I said, you know, honestly, this, all this retirement stuff, like I didn't bring any of this up. This has been more media brought up. And it's like, I feel like people are like pressuring me. Hey, if we win the game or lose the game, like you need to retire. Well, we need a story line. Oh yeah. So it was like, it was one of those things where I just was like, I don't feel that way. So win or lose, I just don't feel like I'm going to retire. I mean, that was your first Super Bowl. That was our 34th Super Bowl as fans slash media members. So you got to understand,

we just need a narrative. We just need to, like, we, you know, the whole narrative I saw the video they did, which was actually really awesome with your kids. But like, that was a narrative, like Andrew Whitworth has kids. That's a narrative. It doesn't like dogs, right? It doesn't like dogs. Exactly. You did say, so one more Super Bowl question. I know it probably is annoying. It's great. It's awesome. It's like, let's keep bringing it up. Yeah. Talk about this. Well, you did say it was the worst game you guys played. I've ever seen your hairline too. Anyways, go ahead. Do you want to take that off? No, I just, if we just want to keep, you know, no, I got to shave today. But I'm just saying, if you want to bring it up, all right, you know

what, let's not do any more Super Bowl talk. No, go ahead. You need to. So Blake is a good friend of ours. He's going really bald. Just get him going. Just take the lead. It's like, it's not maybe, maybe, maybe he's him by shaving his head and be like, damn, dude, you look really good. Yeah. He's just kind of talking into, Hey, man, let's go get on the end of the dive. Yeah. And let's, let's have you talk to him yet. I didn't talk to him about it. I will. Okay. Does he have bad breath? I don't think so. You should actually say that. So we'll cut this part and say Blake Bortles has bad breath because Leonard Furnette said it and he's been like just running from it. I'm very upset. He carries around. How's Blake's breath? I'll approach him

about it. Don't worry. How is this breath? Blake's breath? Uh, you know what? Uh, I'm not sure. I don't know. It's pretty bad. Yeah. I agree. I agree. It's that bad. Is it bad? Really bad. Is it bad? You're saying that like, is it ever bad? Yeah. No, it's pretty bad. Oh, okay. I have a serious football question for you and you can feel free to tell me if it's dumb or not, but is there a difference between blocking for CJ Anderson and Todd Gurley? Uh, no, not at all. That's, uh, yeah, for plays and, and how it works. Uh, you block and do your job and those guys see what they see and, and, uh, you know what they run with the styles they run with. CJ's, he's thick. He's a big boy. He's wearing that blue. You know what? He's, he's, uh, he eats with the Olan

every now and then, you know, that kind of guy. So he's a good dude. So you were, uh, in Cincinnati for the majority of your, your career, um, before you came out here to LA, what was, uh, like you, you, you know, you blocked for Carson Palmer, you blocked for Andy Dalton. What was your highlight that you used? You were like, this is the moment that I remember as a bangle. Um, you know, honestly, I think for me, it's, uh, really just a culmination. I really, when we started when I got there in 06 and, and to building that franchise into, you know, going and having a chance to win some division championships and having some success. I mean, uh, in 0 nine, winning a division championship and sweeping the division with Carson and those guys was,

was an amazing accomplishment. But then also starting all over with Andy and AJ's rookies and going and winning a division in their third season to me was, was, uh, unreal when we had Jay Gruden, Mike Zimmer and all those guys. I mean, it was a special group that year too. So there was some great memories where I obviously never want to play off game and, and, uh, got a chance to make that next step, but really some great years where we had just some unbelievable seasons. Did, uh, Marvin Lewis ever just like sit down and like, when you guys were in mid conversation, just laugh and be like, I'm never getting fired, dude. This is awesome. No, no he didn't. But you know what, uh, you know what, you know, people want a winner and, and, uh, we want a lot of

games there. We just didn't find a way to win, win the playoff games. And that's, uh, that's the tough part with those things. It's like, you know, in the NFL, it's never easy to walk out of a regular season game with a victory. Uh, and we want a lot of them. We just didn't find a way to win when they, uh, you know, it was, it was do or die. Right. Do you still hate the Steelers now that you're not part of that rivalry anymore? No, not really. And I never did then. I mean, you know what, it's just one of those things that, uh, you compete against somebody and, and I look at it like training camp, right? Like your defense, like you love those guys, but in training camp, you are so tired of them putting their hands on you and you having to

put your hands on them that, uh, things get testy time to time. And so I think with the Steelers, it was two really good teams and, and, uh, it was always a lot on the line when we played each other. So I think it was one of those things where we just at times got frustrated with each other and then other guys kind of had their own little internal battles with one another. It is what it is. Did you ever allow yourself to be a little bit intimidated by James Harrison when you saw his workout videos? Uh, you know what? It's easy to get intimidated by James Harrison. His workout videos videos are special. Um, you know what, uh, real special, uh, but, uh, you know, an ordinary special. And, uh, you know what? He's the beast. There's no doubt about

that. And, uh, you know, having to be the guy that ran against him every day for about eight or nine years, uh, my head still fills it and so does the rest of my body. Cause he had a little bit of leverage on me. So it's kind of like me running into a fire hydrant just over and over again. That doesn't sound full. And, uh, it's, uh, you know what the dude's out of hard head too. Yes. Yeah. What, uh, last sensei question, skyline, chili, yes or no? Uh, negative. Yes. There we go. Andrew Midworth, that's going to hurt the people since Natty, but we are, I love them. I mean, they're great people. Terrible taste in chili. It's just, you, if you grew up eating it, you like it, right? They just don't want to admit it, but that's the truth. It's the Stockholm syndrome.

It's just, you grew up eating it. So you think it's good, but it is not good. It is not good. Warmed up baby food. Yes. Especially a guy from Louisiana who has real good food. But wait, then you put spaghetti underneath it. It all makes sense. What if you fried it? Then you'd probably be into it. Maybe. I actually think that that blended skyline chili would taste better than eating it just straight up like you're supposed to. Yeah. Cause I turn into a smoothie. It's, yeah, it's, yeah, it's gross. It is very gross. Um, all right. So, so what's those are your shoes? Oh yeah. 17s. Jesus. How many beers can you fit in there? Uh, you tried? No, I hadn't tried. All right. You know what they say about big, big feet, big shoes. Yeah. That's about it.

That's right. Exactly. Um, are you going to be in the hall of fame? No, I don't think so. Why? I don't know. Okay. Well, you should try a little harder. I'm not popular enough. Well, how many pro balls you've been to? Uh, I don't four or five, something like that. Okay. You got to get the medium. Just play till 45. You know what you, here's what you need to do after every single game, just like call Peter King and give him your take on what happened. Send him some beer and get in his column. Do be like the Instagram posts where I like keep talking about how good I am. Like constantly dominated this week. I love those guys. Yeah. The workout video guys. Oh, I, you know, no matter where their team lost by 40 or not,

like I had a great day. Yeah. I actually know you need to do so it works. I'm assuming that during training camp you have to eat a lot to maintain your weight, right? Cause you're working out so hard. Am I wrong on that? Oh, yeah. I mean, yeah, you go to. Okay. So you need to take pictures of the amount of food that you eat narrative. Yeah. Just keep like sacrifice or the breath horror effect. I keep talking about like everything that hurts. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. But journalists love to be like, yeah, you think you can overcame this? Maybe just keep blind about your eight. Like I'm 40 now and it's really hard out there. Yeah. It's just like, damn, he's 40. If you just say right now, I want to play until I'm 40.

Then that's a narrative. That's a narrative. I want to play till I'm 40. Okay. Got it. Andrew, we're set. We're gonna get your ass. Hell yeah. Do you have any questions for us as media members? Well, I mean, you said you have a relationship with Jerry golf. What's your favorite thing about Jerry golf? Uh, he's just chill. What's your favorite thing about Sean McVeigh? Uh, his memory. Yeah. I would say his voice. I thought you're gonna go beard, but no, that's my least favorite thing. No, he actually gets really self conscious. Yeah. He's asked us not to swear to God. He was like, why do you guys always talk about my beard? So this is what y'all should do then. When you interview, you should say, you know what? We're actually not

going to talk about your beard because wits is better. Yes. Your beard is very nice. But see, then he would like, wait a minute, I want to talk about my beard. Yeah, right. That's good. That's good. That's how you get it. You say somebody else is better. So we don't want to talk about that. Yeah. Maybe not yours because yours isn't that good. But first thing you said was, isn't my beard looking nice? It's looking better, right? And I was like, no, it's not really Sean. No, your beard does look nice. A little salt and pepper. Yeah. Yours looks good. Yeah. This is kind of the George Coliney effect. Yeah. So like I'm trying to, you know, it's like, I don't have anything that looks like George Coliney. So that's why I'm my beard. Yes. Yeah. No, the beard is,

it's a strong touch. So it's just try to go with the, you know, the gray fox look. Yes. Exactly. All right. My last question. Seeky question put in promo code take. You get $10 off your Seeky purchase. You like how I did that? That was awesome. $10 off your Seeky purchase. You can go to a Rams game this year. Hopefully they'll go. Well, no, I don't, I'm embarrassed and I don't want you to go back to Super Bowl, but I wish you luck. Thanks. Okay. You deleted Twitter two days after Super Bowl. Yeah. Why? You know what? It's really one of those things is culmination. And throughout the year, I just kept being like, man, I read this junk too much. And I had an instance with my son, Michael, who's got a little swag to him. And he's not afraid to kind of call

that out. He is. And Sean would tell you about him. And he's, you know, one of those things that he kind of called me out one day and he was just like, dad, could you please get off of Twitter today and throw the football to me? And I was like, the fact that he knows that Twitter and he's like calling me out for throwing the football with him, I was like, you know what, I'm out. So I was like, you know what, I'm going to just for the rest of the off season, I'm out and then I got off and I loved it. And I was like, you know what, this is awesome. I'm not actually worried about what every single person on the planet has to say to me. And so now I'm just an Instagram guy. Turns out you don't need Twitter. Yeah. We need it for our job. But yeah,

we can't quit. But if Swaggy Michael told me to get off Twitter, I might. Yeah. Yeah. Is it weird being older than Sean McFay? Good question. Weird. No, I mean, I don't really even think about it to be honest. Never a problem. Like if he's telling you to do something different, you're like, Hey, I've been around longer. Yeah, no better. Well, you know, you know, you usually don't want to get in arguments with him over stuff that you know or don't know because he's got an insane memory. And his knowledge is pretty high. But most of the time that really wouldn't come into play because more, you know, being, being an old lineman, you're usually looking at people when they tell you to do something like, have you ever put your

hands on somebody else and tried to move them when they're 330 pounds? I appreciate your sentiment. But do you know how hard that is? So it's kind of one of those things, no matter what your age is, I'm probably looking at you like, yeah, okay. Yeah. Okay. By the way, here's a tip, one tip for the road. When you do play past 40, 40 on, do the whole, I might retire, I might not retire and be able to skip training camp. I like it. Yeah. I'm going to say that I'm actually off supporting dogs during training. Yes. Yes. And then I'm going to miss training camp doing and then you get to play. You do the fun part. Yeah. Yeah. Because training camp sucks. Although it's gotten soft. You guys got soft. So do you think it would be super cool

if I like ran out the tunnel with a dog? Yeah, absolutely. On a leash. Yeah. Yeah. That would be going to cool. Yeah. And then we're the man of many charities, except dogs, put them on the sideline and take a picture, put on social media and that dog goes up for adoption every Sunday. Yeah. You got 16 dogs. Yeah. It's really bad that we've come up with a cool idea that we're not going to do. Let's swagger my cool name each dog. Oh, yeah. If you don't do this, then you really do hate dogs because it's such a good idea. Now I've got a great idea. And now if I don't do it, I hate dogs. Yes. So Andrew Whitworth, thank you very much. Man of many charities who hates dogs. That's a line we're going to write when you retire. I thought I was going to leave you feeling

good. Also, Future Hall of Famer. Yeah, Future Hall of Famer. We'll get that. We can get, we have the power to do that. All right. So once we put it out there, we will start talking about Instagram post about dominating Play Doh 45. Pictures of your food. All the food. Pictures of my food. We got it. Yeah. All right. My man. Thanks. That interview with Andrew Whitworth was brought to you by Simply Safe. According to studies, only about 10% of break-ins are planned beforehand. Just go ahead and ask Patrick Chung about that. The rest are spur of the moment. Crimes of opportunity. In other words, they're random. And guess what? July and August, that is when the most burglaries occur. The block is hot. And what's

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quality CBD products from CBDMD. Okay, let's get to some segments. First up, we have Talking Golf, Rory McElroy beat Brooks, but could barely lift the trophy. Did you see that? His twig ass arms. Yeah. So Brooks really won. It's actually pretty sad that Rory has to go out there after Brooks has shown us what a real man looks like when he lifts the trophy. And probably Brooks, say what you want about his play this weekend, but he was probably more used to playing naked. He was probably feeling all sorts of encumbered by wearing clothes on the golf course for a change because he let his balls hang out all over the tour last week by being in the bodies issue. So I'd say that he's a real winner here. What'd you think about Brooks' performance today, Hank? Oh, Hank. I think he had it in the bag

and he choked a little bit. Don't use the C word for Brooks. Not choked, but he could have won that tournament. If he didn't want to, do you ever think about that? Yeah. Andrew Luck didn't want to keep playing football. That's fair. As a fan, he doesn't owe you anything. Hank, don't cast your failures onto Brooks. Okay. Brooks was doing great today. You know what it was? It's the last tournament of the year. He's probably bored as shit of golf. So he's just like, fuck this. I just wanted the playoffs next year, next week. Oh, really? I thought this was the one round playoff. No, there's a playoffs I think coming up. Yeah. This is the last like regular season. I saw an ad for it and I was just like, what is going on? I don't understand it anymore. Listen, if it just means

that I'm sure it'll motivate Brooks to play better in the playoffs because he internally is probably saying the same thing. He's like Randy Moss plays when he wants to play. Yeah. That's Randy Moss is a hallfamer. Straight cash. I checked. Yep. Yeah. Not a Super Bowl champion. This next time I'll shake my dick at you. Well, Brooks has mad majors. How many? Six? Too many. I think he's got four. He's got four majors, right? Five? Five. Five. Five majors and a nude spread in a magazine. Final answer, five. He's got two U.S. Opens. A Masters? No. No. He's got three U.S. Opens. Two Torch Airships. Two PGA championships. He's only got three. No, that's not right. That's not right. He's got four at least. He's got at least five. He won his third at

the 2018 PGA championship. So that means four because he won the U.S. Open. Dude, you just look up his Wikipedia and it will say it. He's got four. He's got four. He's got four. Damn. Hashtag Let Brooks play nude. Okay. Well, he's going to get five, six, seven, eight next year. He's going to get eight majors next year. Yep. Yep. Yep. All right. We have a drunk idea. President Trump wants to blow up a hurricane. Fuck, that's so metal. How is there not an ACDC song already written about blowing up a hurricane? Isn't this just Geostorm? Is it? I think I never saw the previews for it, but I never watched the movie. I'm pretty sure that's the plot of Geostorm. I'm of the mindset that if you're going to launch a nuclear weapon at something, it's pretty badass to hit a cloud with

it. Yes. Absolutely. I want to know what happens. You know, there was actually a plan back in the 50s or 60s, like in the height of the Cold War to nuke the moon just to show the Soviets that we could do it. That would have been so sick. That's pretty fucking cool, right? That's like, that's like the best July 4th fireworks ever. But then they nixed it because they're like, oh, it might like knock the moon into the planet and then destroy our tides and everything. Yeah, the moon's kind of important, it turns out. How would you guys stop a hurricane? Move. I'd move away from the hurricane. I'd run away from the hurricane. It couldn't catch me. Just get a bunch of windmills on the coast. How would I stop a hurricane? Blow it back. I would play prevent defense in the second

half and let them commit a lot of turnovers and penalties. Let them just barf all over themselves. Yeah, just let them attack them with a bear. Ooh, that's nice. Or the swine flu. What about a ninja? Remember when ninjas were cool? Yeah. Ninjas were ninjas did have a moment as they say. Yeah, ninjas were hot in like 2003. Three ninjas. Great movie. Uh-huh. Great kickback. Some might say even better. Doesn't even know that movie. Damn. Getting old. All right. Trouble in Paradise before we get to our Monday reading. Trouble in Paradise. Dwight Howard signed with the Lakers. So he not only signed, but it was a non guaranteed signing. So essentially the Lakers said we can date you and break up with you at any point without like you can't move your tooth tooth

brushing into the house. Yeah. You can't do any of that. No shit in here. Yeah. You can just show up. We'll see if we get along and then maybe we'll make it official. Yeah, there are tears to this agreement. Like if you make it to Christmas time, then you can bring your snakes to California, Dwight. I don't know. Sign the permit for you. I don't understand the signing at all. I do in a weird way because it's perfect for LeBron to be like, you know the old saying the enemy of my enemy is my friend. Yeah. So Lakers fans, no matter what happens, no matter how shitty the team plays, they're going to hate or they're going to hate Dwight more than they hate LeBron. True. So LeBron has a real easy fall guide to point out and Dwight Howard and then be like,

we got rid of the fall guide. Now it's time for us to gel as a team. It's a yeah, it actually is not a bad idea to have Dwight Howard on your team so that when you need the like late February shake up because your team has gotten to like a little malaise, you just quite Howard. I've also said for like four or five years that Dwight Howard is the NBA's wine mom and this was before LeBron got really into wine. Yeah. He just he puts off that vibe a little bit like I don't think he even drinks. I think he's a wine guy. I don't think so. I don't think he drinks. He's a snake guy. I think guys don't drink. I think they do. They just hang out with their snakes. I think they swirled their wine. No, I don't I would be shocked because he's a big God guy and a snake guy. That

doesn't equal wine. Well, those are two polar opposites. That's like a duels guy. A wine or a God and snake. Yeah. No, that is that is very I mean it's fucking snakes or around for since the beginning, dude. He's an apple guy then since book one number one. Yeah. What's your favorite book? I like all of them. I mean, I just respect the Bible. Let's do our Monday reading. All right. What's my favorite verse? Imagine if I never met the homies. Well, let's shout out that verse. All right. All right. Here's the Monday reading. I 21 year old female think my boyfriend, 25 year old male is a necrophiliac. And I don't sounds like a Taylor Swift song right off the

back. I don't know what to do. Necrophiliac for people who don't know is people who like to have sex with corpse. You know a lot about necrophiliac said people. I have dated my boyfriend for almost five years and lived with him. Wait. She was 16. Okay. All right. Okay. Okay. So she was 16. He was 18. He was 20. Okay. All right. Yeah. That's actually the opposite of necrophiliac. Yeah. This is yeah. Okay. A file. All right. Here we go. I've dated my boyfriend for almost five years and lived with him for three. We're very close and I'm hoping. Oh, well that good. Shout out him for waiting until she turned 18 to move in. We're very close and I'm hoping he'll pop the question soon.

Most of our life together is great, but our sex life is just weird. Okay. He's always wanted me to stay still during sex. He says that someone moving around is distracting. He's the only person I've slept with. So I didn't think it was a big deal. Just a little weird. That's kind of strange. Sometimes he asked me to hold my breath, but I thought that could be a choking fetish. Recently, he wants to have sex when I come in from the cold. We're up north in Canada, so we have ample opportunity. He won't have sex if I'm hot or sweaty, which is understandable. No, that's not understandable at all. All right. Here's one thing I hate about sex. It's how everything's like hot and moist and like slippery. That's

guys hate that. Here's where stuff gets weird. We were watching Mindhunter, a show about the FBI tracking serial killers. And I realized he had an erection. Maybe he's just into like the psychology. Maybe he's into the Atlanta child murders. Yeah. Well, no, maybe he's just into politics and like how they navigate is allocating resources to solving murder. I've watched all of season two. There's no scene where boners are allowed are appropriate or appropriate. I'm going through. It's not even like a head right now. Season one, they had what the one of the main FBI guys had that girlfriend like arc that could have been a boner. What if they solve the case though? You're allowed to get erection if you solve the case. The doctor is does get a girlfriend. Wendy gets a

girlfriend. Maybe maybe boner. Yeah. Maybe. Yes. The girlfriend gives I have to go back through it, but I'm saying at most there are three minutes total in a nine episode run where a boner could be like you could you could talk out your way out of having a random erection. So we're not going to say that this is like definitive just yet just because he had a boner. Right. Could have been that one scene. Yeah. Okay. Then two days ago, I found searches of dead bodies on his computer. Well, yeah, I started with that. I kind of solved it started with that one. The mind hunter and all the other stuff. Okay, he was intentionally looking for this shit. It was really graphic and gross. Ask him who his favorite NFL coach of all time is if he says Jim Caldwell, get the fuck out of

the just leave that zip code. Don't pack your shit. It's like weird that she said all the other stuff. And then she's like, Oh yeah. And by the way, there was dead people on his computer. All the weird behavior clicked for me. I haven't said anything to him. I'm scared for my own safety. Yep. Honestly, because I don't know if he'll try to kill me. Ooh, this got dark. I have no idea how to confront him or bring up the idea of couples counseling. Any and all advice would be great. Well, good news is she went to Reddit for this advice. I'm sure there will be a bunch of people who will guide her in the right. I've never been more certain of anything in my life than the fact that this guy also has a Reddit account. Yeah. And he's probably already read it. Well, yeah,

he's probably on. I'm sure there's a is there a necrophiliac or the barstle sports sub. Yeah. Food, necrophiliac. Yeah. Anonymous. There's got to be a reddit for there's a reddit for everything, right? I don't really spend that much time. I'm more of an eight-chan guy. Yeah. Nice. Upgrade yourself. Yeah. Just up a little bit. I mean, I just assume we've been I keep getting tweeted these Monday readings and they seem to all be from Reddit. And it's just like, okay. Yeah. It sounds like a pretty open and shut case to me. Yeah. Just here's what you do. Just pretend to die one day and see what his first move is. You ever do that? I do that. I have to confess. I've done that with my dog once or twice. That's where you just like pretend to be passed out to see what

they would do. And then, you know, he comes up and like noses me and I'm like, oh, I love you. So what you do is you pretend to be dead on the floor, maybe like spill a little bit of Kool-Aid or something like that around your neck. See what his first move is. Is it to call the cops or is it to take his pants off and then you have your answer? Yeah. Okay. Do that and let us know. Well, we actually won't know unless you do another one and it happens to be a Monday reading in the future. We won't be following up on this. Now, is there a alternate version of necrophilia where you get off on having people think that you're dead or the opposite of like you need people who are super alive, like maybe talk too much. Yeah. That's who you want to, you know, like someone

who's just completely vivacious. The person you know, there's just always a bundle of energy. That's the opposite of necrophilia. Yeah, I guess so. I'm lost on this one. Yeah. This is fucked up. What are your thoughts saying? Get out. Get out. Good advice. We should make a movie about that. Yeah, but first do the thing where you pretend to be dead like you do for your dog. Or just put a mannequin on your bed and see if he fucks it. Yeah. There you go. That's the answer. I love it. Or find a dead body and then see if he fucks that. Here's what you do. Like suggest, hey, why don't we go grave digging tonight? Yeah, picnic in a graveyard. Yeah. Let's just see if he likes it. Yeah. See if he starts touching the ground and

get a boner there. Be like, hey, zombie movie this weekend. Let's check it out. Yeah. You need to dig a little bit deeper because I think just having dead people porn on the computer isn't quite enough. Yeah, that's not that. There are so many explanations for how a dead vagina could end up on your computer. Start clicking on you porn. You can end up anywhere. Down a wormhole. Yeah, this is Josh McCann has told us this. This is entrapment. You end up in the brass. The algorithm gets you. All right. We figured it out. So I guess we're on that guy's side. Yeah. All right. We'll see everyone Wednesday. Love you guys. It's part of my take presented by bar stool sports.