Pardon My Take - Brand New 2 Hour Dungeons & Dragons Campaign With Timm Woods and The Wonton Don

Episode Date: July 7, 2023

The people's champ Timm Woods is back for a brand new campaign for the first time in months. Joined by The Wonton Don, this quest is filled with twists and turns that will leave you speechless.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, part of my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen, add free on Amazon music. On today's part of my take, it's Dungeons & Dragons. We are back with our guy Tim Woods, an awesome, awesome episode with special guest, Wonton Don. We did not. Nick is going to come back and do Dungeons & Dragons with us. He was out this week. Wonton Don was a great fill in. It might just be Nick and Donnie next time with us because it was that great, so much fun with him.

And guess what? We changed it up this time. We decided that we were gonna get along and try to complete a mission. So no infighting, trying to kill each other. We're trying to complete a mission and So no infighting trying to kill each other. We're trying to complete a mission and it was so much fun. PFT, my rowback question before we get started. Use promo code take 20% off your first purchase rowback.com joggers, Qzips, polos, shorts,

which I wore all week in Pinehurst. Love the shorts, super comfortable shorts. Go buy them right now at robac.com, use promo code, take 20% off. My question for UPFT, you had to leave for like the last 10 minutes. Do you think we got along the whole time? I think that we did. I think somebody, if I were to guess, because there's always gonna be a little bit of blood loss about somebody wanting to kill Hank.

And we did want to kill Hank many times during the episode, but we held off. I think I think Hank might have caught a stray. Maybe we put Hank in a dangerous situation after I left. Yes. So the ending was great for many reasons. A lot of twists and turns. So go to rowback.com while you're listening to this episode. Use promo code Tick 20% off all the best gear out there. And yeah,

don't just in dragons, it's back, baby. Okay, let's go. Now we'll treat their violence. And then a lot of stuff has worked to be done. No place to hang out or washing and then I can't blame all of the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock it down too. E-L-O, shake I value and then we'll take it higher. It's part of my take. Is anybody? Barstown Sports.

Okay, it is time. One of our favorite times every few months. It is Dungeon and Dragons time. And we have Tim Woods back with us. Dungeon Master extraordinaire. Very excited what we're going to get into today. He Woods back with us. Yeah, that's the dungeon master extraordinaire. Very excited what we're gonna get into today. He actually just told us he's been recognized a few times. So that's, that makes us happy because it means

people are watching. Shout out to all the AWLs who have come up to me on the street, keep doing it, keep saying hi. I always appreciate it. So we thought he'd sort of hang out with people and then I get to brag about it. So you should keep some dye on you just to roll for me. Absolutely, 100%.

Yeah. If you come up to me on the street, I will roll a D20 because I will probably have one on my per se. And if you get a 20, you get to kiss Tim. Yeah. Yeah. We'll see.

We'll see 100%. That wasn't a no. Oh my God. So that wasn't a no. We have a very special episode for you. We're in the green screenroom. So go watch on YouTube, effects and everything. It is Hank, PFT, myself, and Donnie for the first time.

The one-ton Don on the show. Absolutely. No, no one's gonna clap. I mean, I love Donnie. I know Hank in them. No clap. All right. I'm gonna clap for you.

Okay, so before we get into it, we're gonna start a whole new dungeon. What do you call it again? A new adventure. Adventure. A campaign. Okay, so we're gonna start a new campaign. So if you don't know what happened last one,

it's okay, this one stands alone. Now, we have had discussions before we did this episode between Hank, PFT and myself, and now Donnie as well, that we are going to do our best to truce. Listen, I promise not to kill Hank unless Hank does something that makes me have to kill him. Which he might do. Okay, I am promising that I will truce fully.

I will not attack anyone. I want to try to get as far as we've ever gotten where we don't get sidetracked. We've done the kill and, you know, and fuck your dead body and then re-animate you and then fuck that body and then put it inside of a dragon and then fuck the dragon. We've done all that.

That does sound fun. Yeah, fuck. I mean, the way you just put it. Okay, we're trying. We're trying best. I'm not gonna way you just put it, I'm gonna try, we're trying best. I'm not gonna attack Hank, I'm not gonna attack anybody that's in my party, but if Hank does something that's like, he really has a coming, it's gonna be tough for me to not sit.

Yes, we're going in with the best intentions. And what does this say? The best thing I know of that. I am dressed nicely today. Wait, wait, but Hank, you haven't also promised to that attack us. I have, I was the one that started this. I want to have fun with my friends and then just go on a nice adventure together.

Yeah, usually Donnie how it goes is Hank does something really annoying or Billy and then we just have to fucking kill him. Okay, well, if shit goes south, we can always turn on Hank. As long as it's not me. No, no. No, no, no. Ron. Ron. Donnie really took that first truth to heart. Yeah. Well, you can tell the world right. You're right. You're right. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, This is this is gaslighting Tim. This is what I think I think this is what I have fun and they say that means you don't want to have fun and Hank and I have a true I'm just what he does on my behalf. I can't control. I'm truest out Okay, all right, so Tim let's take it away. Where you want to start?

Absolutely. I will say as per usual this adventure I'm about to run for you all is the adventure that I have been running for all the AWLs who have been reaching out to me asking to play games. So every time a group of AWLs reaches out, I gotta give them adventure. I haven't already run for you guys, but I tell them that this adventure we're about to do, the necromancer of Lance Rock, is the adventure that I'm gonna be running with you guys next, and every one of the AWL groups who has gone through this adventure has gotten to the end and finished it. But I also told them I wasn't sure if you guys would or not.

So the record has been set. The PR has been set by the fans and so if we can beat it. So did anyone who played, say the name again, though, the name of the adventure is the Necromancer of Lance rock. The Necromancer of Lance rock. The Necromancer of Lance Rock. Did any of the AWLs who played it and got to the end? Did they have a Hank? They did not.

Well, I shouldn't say none of them didn't have a Hank. So one or two of them Depp, we had their Hank. Wait, when you say the name, the Necromancer, we just got done saying how we're not going to fuck anybody's corpse. And it sounds like this, this campaign is heavily geared towards having sex with dead bodies. So you're a sick rock.

I will say that in this adventure, there are gonna be our share of undead and corpses. What you do with those corpses is largely up to you. It's the ultimate test of our task. It's a little hard, 100%. We do want them to begin through all these juicy corpses we will see, but we have a new player joining us. And Donnie, your character is gonna be the one

introducing us to this quest. Since you are the new character is joining, you're gonna be our kind of hook into this adventure. Because all of these travelers have been on many different adventures, but they haven't visited your village yet of Lance Rock. Since you're a new character, we're gonna say that your character has been living in the village of Red Larch for quite some time and you know about the nearby landmark of Lance

Rock. You know it because it was dropped there by a dragon a long time ago. Lance Rock is a hill known for having this standing stone sort of sticking out of the top of a weird angle and you know a long time ago a dragon essentially threw that rock at a wizard. The wizard deflected it and it landed on this hillside and ever since then there has been a dragon tomb there for a long time. Now you are a ranger, somebody who travels across many lands across the wilderness.

Donnie, you get to name your ranger whatever you want. If you don't have a name right now, no worries, but when you have a name, feel free to shout it out. We've all named our characters. I'll be Gorgable. Gorgable. Absolutely. Gorgable. The Ranger, I love it.

Now, Rangers come in different varieties, and I'll just ask real quick, the two very good races for a Ranger would be deep gnomes, who are these short, Erlik is actually a rock gnome. Deep gnomes come from deep within the earth and also wood elves make great rangers as well. Do you have a preference between either of those?

Um, are there any aquatic rangers? Ooh, um, tritons would be people like Murpho who come from the oceans. Murpho. And so you could be an aquatic type ranger if you were a triton, perhaps. Okay. Now, will we be encountering any water on this expedition?

No, I'll tell you right now, not too much water on this particular expedition. Not unless we're dragging on this. Not unless, yeah. We can find some, yeah. Okay, then I'll be the ranger that comes from underground. Absolutely. The deep-nome ranger would be a great choice. So you're a deep-nome ranger, very maneuverable, extra stealthy, that means.

And rangers in theory can specialize in ranged combat with the bow, or getting it to hand-to-hand combat with their double swords. Do you have a preference between either of those? Double swords. Double swords, absolutely. Okay, but then last question. As a ranger, you can either specialize in being a hunter and taking down monsters, or having Double swords. Double swords, absolutely. A kimbo. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don.

A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don.

A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don.

A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-don. A kimbo-do? He actually has his own pet. You have a low-level of the M. But you also get a pet. It's just not an M. It's some sort of forest down. Or aquatic kind of, whatever you want. I like hippo down.

Can it be a hippo? It can be a little hippo. That's what I like. You're saying hippo. Absolutely. You own a hippo from Cincinnati. Okay. Yeah, she's very cute.

Yeah. Absolutely. You've got this baby hippo and you know the hippo. Oh wait, the hippo's rolling. I can't do much with a baby hippo. need a full ground. You know what you got a a a young hippo, but it's not We're gonna go Mode I love that absolutely yeah and you're a dual you should do maybe like

a old-school prank you all you have like a few hippos mean median in mode and like where the hell the other hippos go oh yeah yeah yeah right and hippo four yeah we're all looking for hippo three the whole time well you can say Hank. You have something to say? No, I love, I love mode the hippo. Oh, absolutely. I was gonna say Tim,

you can get a little closer to the mic. 100%. Absolutely. By the way, also we should just say, Hank is, if you're listening on the podcast, you should watch on the YouTube, Hank stress like he's got a purple wizard's outfit. Merlin.

PFT's got a deflated dragon. Yeah. I'm riding a deflated dragon. I'm riding the deflated dragon. He comes to the battery pack, but when I turn it on, he gets on the mic here, I'll switch it on. Just second re-up on my dragon. Yeah, I'm dressed as Maui from Moana and Donnie or sorry, Garbagool.

Garbagool. I'm kind of like Garbagool. Garbagool. All right, let's do it. Absolutely. Garbagool's dressed like a night. Garbagoor. Ooh, I got it. I call it Garbagool. Garbagool. Garbagool. All right, let's do it, absolutely. Garbagool's just like a night. Garbagool. Yeah, a night in a max was the one who put this costume on me,

so it's currently far apart. Little Garbagool. Yeah, Big Cat's actually just dresses max with tattoos. That's pretty much. Big Cat's doing orange body right now. I might have picked a more heavily armored fighter knowing that would be your costume, but as a traveler of the world,

Ranger is definitely the most fitting class for you for sure. Oh, yes. And as someone who hunts dragons and the undead on a regular basis, you know that we are in danger because you have heard that near red large, near the village of red large, near this landmark of Lance Rockware, there are caves underneath this hillside. There was this dragon-laid to rest, but recently, people have been going missing

near Lance Rock and their bodies haven't been turning up. Rumor has it because a bunch of kids essentially like rode their bikes essentially over to Lance Rock and only three of the five kids made it back. They reported that they saw a signpost outside of a cave that said, ye who seek your deaths, enter and face the necromancer of Lance Rock.

And if there's a dragon's body and a necromancer, someone who is known to raise the dead as their undead minions, then that is a bad combination. You hunt undead and dragons, and if you have an undead dragon, you need to deal with, that's a big problem. I've seen Game of Thrones. 100% exactly right.

You know you're gonna need a team for a mission like this. And luckily, you assemble the team. He can fight dragons and undead, but not undead dragons. No, he was actually the most effective of undead dragons. But, I'm gonna need my friends.

And undead dragon is so powerful that you would need your friends by your side. So you've recruited this team and you are ready to head to Lance Rock. Our adventure would begin at the mouth of this cave, but anybody on their turn could say they're doing their turn back at Red Larch. If you feel like there's a reason to either gather supplies or talk to people in town or like try to gather other information, but the action really begins at the cave. So I will ask if everyone would like to go around and do their first role of the game. This D20 role will determine initiative order who will go first. So if everyone rolls a D20. I got a four, a four for Ehrlich.

Now we're like, you have a plus two on that, so you get a total of a six. I got a seven. A seven, and you have also a plus two on this, so you get an eight, or a nine. You have a nine. I got a nine. Now, you actually roll two times norm of the barbarian,

because as a barbarian, you get a bonus to your initiative, called Ferrell Instincts. Five. Five. What was the first rule? Nine, so I'll take the nine, you get a bonus to your initiative. We call it Ferrell Instincts. Five. Five. What was the first rule? Nine. So I'll take the nine. You have a plus two on that, that's an 11 for norm.

And how did you do? I wrote a three. I wrote a three. A three. Ooh, I'm sorry to say you have a plus three on that, though. So you'd be going right after earlick, it looks like. Okay. And that is a gargable.

Gargable, the range, you're excellent. Gargable in the worries, you'll get to see the others in action and then your turn will be the final turn. But I will point out that right now you're the best at navigating us through the forest. So either way, I imagine you'll be the one leading us to Lance Rock to get us to this landmark without any danger. But norm, you were up first. You could do your turn at the cave and see what's going on there, or you could do your turn

back in town. Yeah, let's check out this cave. Absolutely. You get to this cave. And when you arrive, I will say that you, with your perception, are just barely able to tell that outside the cave, you can kind of see over the trees, the top of the cave up ahead, but you can hear there are creatures outside the cave that are talking. Now neck remansors deal with the undead and undead typically don't do a lot of talking.

So whatever these creatures are, they're speaking a language you do not understand. One of them sounds really big. One of them sounds very small. Okay. I'd like to grab both of them sounds really big. One of them sounds very small. Okay. I'd like to grab both of them by the neck. Now you haven't seen them yet. Would you like to approach them in first-out?

Yeah, yeah, approach them first. Absolutely. As soon as you approach them, you burst out the woods. Doesn't sound like you're being sneaky about this. No, no, no. So they immediately turn to look at you and you realize why one of them sounds big. He's an ogre.

This ogre stands almost to the height of the cave. He turns, as he looks in your direction, and you realize riding on his shoulder is a teeny tiny little goblin. She has her hair pulled back in a ponytail, and she's an eye patch on. She goes, ah, that's what I'm talking about! And she draws her short bow and noxenara

and points at you. The ogre lifts up what you thought was a dead tree. It's his club and he begins marching towards you. Go bra! Okay, am I bigger than the ogre? You are not bigger than the ogre. Okay, all right, so let's transition here. Maybe just a quick like, hey, what's up guys?

I didn't, you know, no big deal. I wasn't trying to start a fight. I just was wondering what, what, what I just was wondering what you guys talking about. Absolutely. Go ahead and roll a persuasion check on this ogre and goblin. 12 and now can I ask you have the intimidation skill by any chance on your sheet? Intimidation skill. I do have plus one. Now this is not intimidation. This is persuasion because you're trying to be nice to them. And based on that plus one and you're trained in that, that tells me your persuasion is actually a

minus one on that. So with an 11, I'm sorry to say that the goblin stops for a second. They look at each other and they're going right back to fighting you. They are about to open fire unless you want to try again with your bonus action or you could try something else with your bonus action. I think now I have to fight them. You could try to fight them now. I would say you can shout it to them with your bonus action and now you can swing it them with your weapon if you want or you can try to talk again.

We just, we can't turn around. We have nowhere to turn around to. This is the beginning of that. We've got to push forward. You know what? I would like to fuck them up though in a way that we can figure out what they're talking about. So maybe like a beautiful form tackle and just hold them down.

Absolutely. You could do a grapple check. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, like hold them in a headlock, not like Zuckerberg when he got knocked out. Absolutely. Not kicked out. He did not get choked out. Well, he got a little choked out.

We did not. We don't want to choke him out. He did not get choked out. I want him to just be totally neutralized and they're like All right, we understand sorry You know we'll talk and are you trying to do this to the little goblin or to the big old? I think the big ogre I think I got to go for the big guy all right I'm gonna roll for the big ogre then and you're gonna need to try to beat whatever the ogre gets Oh the ogre ruled really bad. He only got it too. He has a plus four on this though,

so you still gotta be a six. And you get to roll one, because you're not raging yet. 17, absolutely. Plus your athletic bonus, you get the ogre in a headlock. The ogre starts roaring. I'm gonna see how upset he is about this.

He is very upset right now. He doesn't understand that he should probably be surrendering right now. His face is getting really red, but the goblin drops your drop- She pulls out a knife and she tries to hold it to your neck right now. Okay. Do you do, do you do say anything to her or do anything? Yeah, I'm gonna just grab the knife and flip it and be like, ooh, I will let you attempt to do that.

But now you are trying to maintain your grip on the, oh, she only got a total of a five on that. But you have disadvantage on this because you've got one arm around the ogre. So we're all two times and take the lower number this time. Nine. Nine is already enough,

so if you can just not do worse than a nine. Twelve, twelve you're doing fine. You flip the knife on her, you grab her knives, you got one knife at her throat, arm around the ogre's neck. What a boob. The two of them are like really impressed, they're looking at each other like, who the fuck is this guy? And that is an amazing first turn right there, Norm.

I'm gonna roll to see when these two are going. They're not going until after Gorgable's turn. So we've got some time before these two get a chance to do anything. Are you like a muscle? I have the muscle, I'm normed the living car barrier. The barbarian. The smash shit.

You're kind of the skills. He's the face of the group and you're kind of like the evil face a little bit. Well, the guy we don't know, yeah. Yeah, the wild car. Yeah, that's a good way to describe an asshole. Well, the guy we don't need to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The wild part. Yeah, yeah. It's a good way to describe an asshole. Who's the brains though?

Uh, yeah. How many brains do we have? We have mine. It's console of PFT and Hank have good brains. Also, these more just the faces here. He was kind of the brain. He was kind of the front man. Yeah, I'm just so good looking.

I tell you what I'd like to do. Absolutely. I'd like to help just throw this out there. Yeah, so I'd like to do hideous laughter on them. I want to make fun of them. I want to go to the two of them, the ogre and the goblin. The goblin.

And be like, you're not him. Absolutely. You look like you're giant, you look like you're not him. You're just not him. What 100% would you be trying to make the ogre laugh or the goblin laugh? You get to make them laugh. We're trying to make them laugh, right?

We're trying to make them laugh, right? You can't pick books. I want to make my boys laugh, but I want to, we're trying to make them laugh. You get to make them, of course. You can't pick boats. I want to make my boys laugh, but I want to, also make them cry. I want to insult them. I guess that might be vicious mockery. That's my vicious mockery. I want to absolutely write 100%. Okay, vicious mockery, I'd like to mock them.

Absolutely. This targets one person. Do you target the goblin? This could be enough to kill the goblin. Or would you target the ogre? How much damage could I do to the ogre? You would deal two, D4 damage to the ogre, but this ogre is built like a brick shithouse.

He looks like he is over 50 points. I already got him in the fucking limit. I know, true. It's true, he's clearly not as skillful. Is some of the warriors. If we were to only keep one of them who has more information, you think, or who's more likely to spell?

You know automatically, the brawn of this operation is the ogre, the brains, the obelisk. That was a hurtful question. The fact I always has the least amount of information. Yeah, but sometimes they give it up easier. You starve out for like a day, then they'll give up anything. But if I make fun of it,

we have a more saving throw, it's true. If I make fun of the big guy, he's probably got like a tiny little ego that he's like, it's true. He's built himself up. He lifts weights. He's easier to affect. Yeah.

Um, I want the information from the small one. Yeah. So I think I'm going to insult the ogre. Absolutely. You insult the ogre. He has a minus two on this saving throw. And he only, he got a 14, which would have been enough, but with a minus two, a 12, just barely fails against your vicious mockery spell.

You get to roll two D4s. We're gonna see how much damage this guy takes. That's a three so far. And a two, so the ogre. That's probably a seven-three. Oh, you're absolutely right, 100%. Thanks for catching that. Six damage on the ogre, well done.

You can tell the ogre still has something close to 50 hip points left. But what do you say to insult him? I just tell him he's not him. You say you're not that guy, you're not him. Yeah, you're not that guy, pal. Absolutely. He starts bleeding out of his nose, his eyes cross.

It goes me that guy, me that, me him, me, me, me, me, Mogra and he's looking around and you see the goblin go, you, you Mogra, you Mogra, but she's kind of shrugging like he's right, you're not, you're not him. And so I installed him from his girl. You see the ogre's shoulder slump and he gives up on trying to break free of norms grip. Well done.

Not one of them wants. Absolutely. Now that's your action and your move to approach these two. You still have your bonus action and you could use it to inspire anybody in your party if you wish. No, I want to gas my boy handcuff. Erlich. Yeah, Erlich.

You're Erlich, right? Erlich. Okay, yeah, I want to gas my boy Erlich up. I want Erlich to just absolutely dominate. I want him in the good mood. Absolutely. What do you say to inspire Erlich who's coming in behind you? I say listen, hey, Erlich, just absolutely dominate. I want him in a good mood. Absolutely. What do you say to inspire Erlich? Who's coming in behind you?

I say listen, Hey Erlich, I don't care what everybody else says about you. I think that you're pretty cool. And you're not lame and you're not very killable. What do you say? I definitely don't want to murder you. What about the thing you said to me earlier? No, but I don't care what everybody else says.

Okay, yeah. That was a private conversation. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Thanks for having me. I'm not a barbarian, I'm not very smart. Yeah, you got this, bro. Early, you feel very inspired by. Yes, I do. I think exactly I needed to hear. Absolutely. And really reassured me on this journey. At any point, I like your tone. If you know, if you feel like you got close,

but not quite on a D20 role, you can now add a D8 to any one of your D20 role It's a huge, huge And Erlich, we're up to you. What would you like to do next? I would like to use my skill and investigate the gnome Abs? The new gnome who has joined our party? Oh no, the goblin, the goblin, sorry, I'm not fighting against that Ogre has given up this goblin with the eye patch and our spikey ponytail.

You can go up and you can make an investigation check. What are you hoping to learn? Are you hoping to learn like what she's thinking or what she's hiding? I think we probably need to know about what's kind of ahead or what, you know, if we're trying to go through them, what are we going through to? Absolutely. You could use investigation to just look ahead, but if you're trying to look at her and see what she's hiding, that'll be insight. Or should we do, do we need to know about this undead warrior? Do they think that you think

they know the missing kid too? Or there's two missing kids, right? Two missing kids. Five kids left. Three came back. Can we take, can we take her with us? She hasn't agreed to come with us, but you could go up to her and make an intimidation or persuasion check together to come with us. Maybe see if she likes any of us like more than her friend? That would be insight to find out what she's thinking. I can kill this ogre when it comes back to my turn and just take the little goblin.

Or we could take them both. Maybe we just do a little sweet. Let's find out what they know first and see if it's valuable to have them with us. Or they're gonna to go in the ogre. He's just going to slow us down. Yeah. Fuck them up. If he slows down, we'll eat him for meat. But go ahead. Okay. Yeah.

It's got a lot of meat. Let's find out what they know about the kids. It's all about the kids. Yeah. Absolutely. Would you like to make your first sweet to ask them or would you like to use insight to see like what they're thinking? Most of your arguments online are just you're thinking about the kids protecting the kids.

Yeah. That's why that's why you are the way you are. Some things are bigger than than then dragons. I mean, what skills do you have under? I have arcana history intimidation, investigation, persuasion, and stealth. You could use persuasion or intimidation to get them to spill the beans on. It's too intimidation. Let's let's let's go to old school way. Since they're already pretty scared, you have advantage on this roll two times and take the higher number. That would be a six. Is the number that is at the bottom? That's a six, great number. And a one. Oh, okay, we'll ignore the one, but with the six plus what's your persuasion or intimidationation bonus. Plus six. Plus six, okay. With the 12, you're gonna get them to answer one question, but only one question.

Great turn, hey. Good job, hey. What do you wanna know from the goblet? She first of all, she goes, listen, listen, hold on, hold on, big mistake. My name Yika, he mogra, we treasure hunters, no fight, please, please, no fight. What do you say to her?

Is the dragon, do you know anything about the dragon is the dragon alive dragon dragon? Oh They say dragon buried inside of this cave. We hear roaring when we outside of here Mogurg get real real scared He big baby. I tell him go inside. We find real good treasure if dead dragon in there maybe not so dead anymore Didn't we know the dragon was dead? We thought the dragon was dead and we In case we have to kill hang that my reasons why we just Yeah, no, I know I just don't mental fight alive It's undead so it's like We can we find it we're good. Can we find out who's on the dragon's flight logs?

Cause he's got two kids buried underneath the ground there. That's true. Three, three, two kids. We have two missing kids. Two missing kids are unaccounted for that might be somewhere in this country. Good question, actually. No bodies were found.

This dragon is Epstein. I'm pretty sure he's dead, not dead. Nobody knows. And it does seem like nobody knows whether it's a live or dead, but they did hear a dragon roaring. And this dragon hasn't been seen in dozens, if not hundreds of years. So it would be very surprising if it was still alive,

but he is making noise in some capacity. And so they tell you that and they're not looking to know. That's good to know, I guess. The goblin is not looking to fight either. It seems like both the ogre and the goblin have kind of surrendered to us with that turn. Erlik as a bonus action, you could place a hex on one of these enemies or you could say one more thing to them. What would you like to do? Ask about the kids. I'd say you could ask one more question. Yes, because the dragon is dead or not again. No, because that's like a trick question.

Are you sure the dragon? Have you seen any kids? They say, yes, we saw five kids come by the other day. One of them, Zambi, come out from behind tree. Grab kid, pull him behind tree. Then we hear running things, come out of cave, run after other kid, drag him back, much faster than zombies, whatever they are.

So we got zombies and some track stars. Yes, I'm so fast zombies. Mm-hmm. Now that is the information you are learning, Erlich, unless I did not ask, would you have used your bardic inspiration to try to get more information out of them? No, I'm not a good question, so I think we'll save that.

You can save that bardic inspiration, absolutely. That will bring us to Garbogul. Garbogul's turn. Did Tim just ask you? Garbogul wanted to do a better turn and Hank said, no thank you. Is that what you're saying? Well, I have only have so many questions.

I've done a lot of things. You say the bardic inspiration for maybe a life or death situation. Yeah, it's like using your challenge in the first quarter. Even if you can win it. But when you win your challenge, you get, you keep it.

I mean, three points in the NFL. Yeah, no, we're not in NBA. We're in the podcast. I mean, it's NBA, it's final season. No, no, no. Okay. Gargable, what would you like to do? You see that your friends have wrestled this goblin

and ogre to the ground, gotten them to more or less surrender at this point. The cave is up ahead. What would you like to do? I think we start making our way into the cave. Absolutely. But I'm considering using my Primeval awareness first. Ooh, absolutely.

Just to maybe gain some insight on what we're going to be dealing with in that cave. Yes, you could. You burn up one of your spell slots as you meditate on your permeable awareness. And as you start meditating, you can sense inside of the cave, the presence of undead. Now normally that's all the spell would give you, but I will let you roll a perception check to see if you can learn more. Either perception or survival, whichever skill is better for you

I think they're both plus six that right absolutely roll the d20 plus six to see what you can get on this Detect more than just the presence of on is it matter what dice I roll? No, no, you're rolling the d20, but whichever d20 you want absolutely Oh, okay, it is a very lucky D20 right there. This one? That's a particularly lucky one. This one has been hot. All right, let's go.

Not this time though. Seven plus six is a 13. I'm going to tell you two piece of information with a 13. First of all, there are lots of little undead signatures, little pings coming from inside that cave. One of them is definitely more powerful than all the others. And it is showing up as not just in undead, but also a dragon. And that signal is coming from in, so the cave is to the north of you, it's to the north and then to the

east. So forward and to the right. That is where the undead dragon signal is coming from. There is a second powerful signal coming from forward and to the left instead forward and west. But then you are also noticing that there's some weak undead signatures inside and up for some reason. As you look around it, that kind of has to do with anything. And you're noticing those are the closest to signals inside and up. for some reason as you look around it. That guy has for anything. And you're noticing, those are the closest to signals inside and up. And as you're looking in, you're like, you should be able to see those undead.

And you don't. It's almost like they're above the tunnel that is inside the cave. Okay, now can we start making our way in? You absolutely. As the navigator. I think we should. And the navigator, you could be the one to lead your way in?

Now as the navigator, are you entering sneakily? Are you entering carefully and looking around as a bonus action? What would you like to do? I think we should go stealth here. Stealth. We're surrounded. They're everywhere.

Stealth with your hippo. Absolutely. That's all right. Are you traveling with your hippo? Is your hippo going ahead? Is your hippo hanging back? I think we need to bring the hippo. Absolutely. That's all right. Are you traveling with your hippo? Is your hippo going ahead? Is your hippo hanging back? I think we need to bring the hippo in. Obviously, obviously your hippo is just as stealthy

as you are. Let's go with that. Because I do not know how stealthy a hippo would be. They might be very... Everything I've heard is actually they're quite stealthy. So, what is your stealth bonus? A plus six, I believe? Yes.

Yes, go ahead and roll a D20 plus six. Whatever you get will be whatever your hippo gets 13 plus six is a 19 as you stealthily enter you start to make your way 10 feet in 20 feet in and you can see up ahead it opens up into a larger 30 foot by 30 foot square room. Like this is the tomb you're entering now. And you can just barely see up ahead, a locked door on the right, and another tunnel on the left empty room up ahead. Except you notice that above you and behind you,

there is a slight groan of zombies. Okay. Look up and behind you and you see a pair of zombies looking down, but you've been very stealthily moving along the wall. They haven't noticed you yet. You see the two of them holding a footlock or chest between them that you realize has been filled with rocks. They just keep staring at the open tunnel like they're waiting and they're even just

swinging their hands back and forth, like they are ready to throw this box of rocks on the first person they see coming down the tunnel. But they didn't see you, so you can do whatever you want. What would you like to do? Can I have the hippo charge? Yes, 100%. Now, here's the problem. They're on a ledge above and behind you.

So, if you want hip-o to charge, it would have to jump up to these zombies. Yeah. It's a young, little, small hip-o. So jumping skills. I, hip-o's could only jump in the water. I don't know, that sounds gonna be really scary. Kind of risky, hip-o.

I send a hip-o. I'll say it certainly doesn't have advantage because it's not in the water, but I'd say it has like a plus four on its jump check. I need to get a 15 or higher. I don't want my hip-o jumping, I only want to jump a lap round. You could also wait and have Norm throw your hippo up.

Oh yeah, I get like a bowling ball. It's a good call. Norm would actually be the best. I think he's gonna do that for you, bro. Chuck in it. Okay. We got the hero. Okay, I just love the ogre.

You could. Oh, he tapped it. He knows what's up. He's still outside the cave. If you guys want to bring the ogre you can because we can I would rather throw the ogre at people Then my hip oh yeah, I could call cuz I was thinking about killing the ogre at some point in my mind The ogre and the hip are around the same size so we can we can kind of use them He's going boy. He said in his mind. That's fine I will say that you are able to definitely,

if you don't want your hip-hop to go ahead, you can signal back to your teammates without the zombies noticing that there are two enemies up there so that they're all aware of the threat. Okay, yeah, we talked about this. We're gonna support each other. So I'm gonna let the homies know there's danger. And I'm gonna back in for them to come join me.

Yeah, I'll throw that over. Okay. They're on the throw that over. The ogre would be tough to throw. So it's about to be the ogre and the goblins turn and they've surrendered to us. They're not doing anything right now. They will ready their turns for whatever we tell them to do.

Norm, you can try to pick up the ogre and throw it but because he's a size category larger than you, you'd have disadvantage. But if you rage, you get advantage on throwing people. So you could make it just one straight roll, no advantage, no disadvantage. Okay, I mean, I am a gambler. So are they going first, and then I get to the guard. They just ready to do whatever you want.

So if you say I'm going to throw you to this ogre, he kind of like curls up to and nervously get ready He's let's do advantage and I'm gonna try to throw this ogre So we have to hit both absolutely you You enter your rage you go to pick up this ogre, but you need it at least a 15 to throw this You can also throw the goblin you it would be much easier to throw the goblin You could throw a goblin or the goblin you can fit in one hand and just throw like this. Just fuck this, the ogre, you would need to pick up over

your head like a boulder and chuck to your hand. Power rate real quick, if I throw the goblin, it's not gonna really do much, right? You small, the goblin's very small. You throw the hippo? That you could pick up the hippo and throw the hippo. That would have hurt the hippo. The hippo is, I just chose not to throw my own hippo.

Yeah, I would have tried to be like, okay, yes. It's like, you could look in your hippo's eyes and be like, I promise you I'd never throw you. Yes. And then I'll show up and be like, I didn't, this is like what they put on. I never said at the end to throw a Hail Mary

because Andrew Luck doesn't have the arm strength. That's a big cat's doing with your hippo. I don't want to throw your hippo though if you don't want me to throw your hippo. Is there anyone else here that I could throw? What if you threw the goblin? And he's a dwarf and he's a gnome. You can throw both of them very easily. If you threw the goblin? And he's a dwarf and he's a gnome. You can throw both of them very easily.

If you threw the goblin, she does have a bow and arrow. That's true. What about if I cut off a leg of the yogurt through that? Oh, that's much easier to throw than the whole. That might be our solution. Yeah. Okay. The other guy seems to be getting upset

like he's understanding a little bit of your time. The goblin has like a knife though. So if you threw the goblin up there, he could just start I'm old nice. We don't want to be true. What's the goblin turn nice? Yeah, what do we want to give back the weapon? Because I have it. Okay. Yeah, yeah, you're right. Goblin gets up there and then joins the bad guys Okay, I have a solution. You can throw the hippo actually, you know, I'm fucking going up there myself. Oh Yeah, I'm gonna take run up and You can just jump up there with your own athletics. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I'm just gonna fuck shit up. Absolutely. A hundred percent, so you're not throwing anybody. You run up to where the Ranger has let you know that there is this ledge. Immediately, you're kind of like doing this jump, like you run over, turn on the spot, and jump backward relative to where you had been running.

Go ahead and since you're raging now, you have advantage on this roll 2D 20s and take the higher number. Will you know, will you let the hippo know that you did not throw it? Yeah, I will. And you know what? We can still throw it later on. Okay, yeah. It comes down to that. Yeah, yeah. Mote is a very smart hippo and understands language, so Mote knows like, yeah, respect. Okay, you didn't throw me. All right. So I get two rolls. Absolutely. You get two rolls and you get to take the higher one. Is the six?

Six. Okay. Nine. Ninety. Ninety. Ninety. But your athletics is plenty. In fact, it's so much, I would say that you automatically gain advantage on your attack

against one of these zombies. Would you like to attack the one on the left or the one on the right? Let's go with the one on the Hank Witch one or the Republicans and Democrats. They are Republicans. I don't also say this. I remember right after the right. The fully grown villager and one of them is just a really tall kid who has a scar running down his face and as he

turns you see the empty eye socket. He is one of the village kids who got caught. Okay, so let's go with the other. Let's let's attack the guy on the left and woke mind virus and we'll get him. Um, so it's an adult I'm attacking. Yeah, absolutely 100%.

You have advantage already. Now I will say if you're willing to go reckless, I'll give you double advantage on this. I'll let you roll three times. Are you going reckless? No, I can't turn down reckless. All right, you're raging and you're going reckless. Yeah, I love it.

Go ahead and make your first attack. You roll three times on this attack. Five, not great. Not great, start. That's Not great. Not great start. That's an 18. 18 is fantastic. Let's see if you can get a critical hit though. Now it doesn't usually count when it falls on the floor.

That was my fault. Seven. Seven. So we'll take that first middle roll. That very high roll is a solid hit against that zombie. You're damaged with your great sword. You're using a great sword and not a great axe correct or using a great axe today Yeah, whatever the great Absolutely your great hook would deal one D12

Damage plus five while you are raging. Oh, is that a one plus five? He's only going to be six damage. On the first zombie, I am sorry to say, but luckily that's not your only attack. You slash across the zombie's chest. He's not halfway dead yet. He's injured though, and you get to do another attack three times against him. Well, that's going to be the damage, but go ahead and roll the D20 again three times to make sure that you hit. What type of zombies? I know a lot of zombies, you can only kill if you take off the head. This is a very good point. So you know that zombies, if you kill them with a critical hit, it means you hit them in the head and you insta kill them.

Otherwise, these zombies can keep getting back up, unfortunately. Okay. And 10 was the highest of the rolls. Yeah, one of them landed on the papers I rolled against. So it was three, it was five, three, 10. Absolutely, we'll take the 10. You have a plus six on your attack with your great axe. That's another hit for another D12 plus five.

11. 11 plus five is 16. Now that should be enough to finish off the zombie. But as I said, the zombie you hack into its neck and shoulder, it gets a roll to see if you can just walking dead style, kind of start crawling towards you, but you need to roll very well. It did not roll very well.

You took the zombie's head right off. Immediately, the box of rocks drops to the ground. The other zombie, the kid zombie is just holding the other end stupidly as the rocks spill out and it goes, and throws it over the edge. It lands right next to the hippo and our ranger, but doesn't deal any damage. Well done. I'm excited. We'll let's take a quick break for an ad. This episode apart, my take is brought to you

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We got one zombie left. I am going to roll to see when this zombie would be going, unfortunately, now that we have alerted it, that zombie only gets a four. So the zombie's gonna be going after Garbagull's next turn. We got plenty of time to finish off the zombie, and it's Wayne's turn now. Are you sure I take out the zombie,

or is there a way that we can convert it from not being a zombie to me? Yeah, because it's the kid, you know what I take out the zombie or is there a way that we can convert it from not being a zombie anymore? Because it's the kid. I'm gonna say the kid. I'll kill a normal zombie, but if there's a chance that we can help this kid, that's what I want to do. Go ahead and roll a knowledge check on this.

I think you would have Arcana plus four. Okay, with a six, not plus four, is it ten? All you know is that typically zombies cannot be reasoned with. And once you're a zombie, you're already dead. There's no way to restore you back. In my hands are tied. A human in my hands are tied to him. Regrettably, can I like that Wesley Snipes gift

from New Jack said he just wanted to let it be known? I'm crying while it's winning my weapon. Absolutely, 100%. You know, you're like, you're fighting your tongue. Tears in your eyes. What weapon would you like to use to attack the zombie? What do you recommend, the light crossbow or the rapier? I would use the light crossbow if you want to stay at distance.

If you want to get into melee, you can try to climb up and stab with your rapier, but it deals the same damage. Not on a sniper, I want to snipe from Stefan Curry. Absolutely, 100%. You can roll a D20 plus five, I believe, is what you get with your light crossbow. 10 plus five is a 15, that's a solid hit for 1D8 plus two damage against this zombie.

Oh no, only three damage against the zombie, unfortunately. Even though it has less hit points than the other zombie, it's not down just yet. This arrow just sort of like thuds into its arms splits out the other side and the zombie barely even seems to notice it's happening. It's already to lunge towards norm. It's not everyone can't kill. I think you missed on purpose because you didn't want the guilt of having to the kid. Yeah, it would be way on my conscience very heavily. It's tough. I have no consolation.

I'll kill it later. Now, would you like to give any other bardic inspiration to anybody here? You can't give any more to Erlik because he still has bardic inspiration. And kind of wasted my inspiration too last time. I don't know how you've got it. He saved it. Yeah, I feel bad about wasting on Erlik. So I'll give it to Garbageool.

Garbageool. Yes, Garbageool. You've got this bardic inspiration. Now, what do you say to inspire Garbageool? I'm like, hey man, I'm really glad that you joined a crew. You're a great addition. Good off season pick up. I'm happy to be here.

I will not lead you guys astray. Yeah, and I love your hip-hop too. Which is very much a lot. Very much to the live hip-hop. The wings that you eat. Movings to you. Yeah, nice. Absolutely. He's only gonna be tossed as a last resort.

Yeah. Inod's fervently mode. Absolutely. And Urlic, that would bring us to you next. What would you like to do? I would like to attack. Yes, absolutely. I would like to finish what Wayne started.

The song is not halfway dead, but it is injured and you could potentially finish it off. What attack would you do? I would like to finish what Wayne started the zombie is not halfway dead But it is injured and you could potentially finish it off what attack? I would like to use a light. No, use the short sword because you got to cut its head off right absolutely now You can use your short sword if you climb up the wall or jump up to get to this zombie You do have many range spells you could do against the zombie without needing to climb that I honestly deal more damage if I do Like a really good crossbow that just take its head off. It could feasibly take its head off. I like to do that like a sniper.

Absolutely, 100%. You can roll a D20 plus, what does it say it is to hit for your... A crossbow? 1D20 plus 5. Plus 5, roll a D20 plus 5. We'll see if you hit. Ooh, what'd you get?

Two. A two? Two? Do you say? Two. A two? Two? Do you say? Two. Here's the good news. You're not accidentally hitting norm because you get wrong.

Oh, absolutely. So with a two plus five, so far you got a seven. That's actually not that far off from hitting a zombie. So roll a D8. You are using your inspiration. You're going to roll an eight-sided die. This one right here. You got a Tony Snell stat line. And you're going roll an eight-sided die. This one right here. You got a Tony snail stat line.

And you're gonna add that to this seven. Now that's a D10, but yeah. Sorry, it's a very, there you go, absolutely. That's the D8. Eight. Oh, absolutely. We're the plus eight to the seven, a 15 is a solid hit against the zombie.

Well done. Go ahead and roll. What does it say the damage is? 1D8 plus two for your light crossbow? 1D20 plus five to hit. Or plus five to hit. 1D8 plus two. 1D8 plus two, there you go.

So roll the D8 again and add two to it and we'll see how much damage the zombie takes. Seven. Seven. Plus two is nine more damage. The zombie takes 12 damage. It looks like it then drops to the ground right in front of norm, but then

it stays dead. I'm happy to report. It thrashes around a little bit norm. It starts to get up. Falls dead to the ground, both zombies are permanently slain now. And as it is slain, suddenly you hear a voice in your mind, Erlik, that nobody else hears. The voice says, Oh my life, thank you, you saved me. And it's the kid you think. For just a moment, you think you see this ethereal shape over where the zombie fell. Then, Erlik, you, because it's you who did the kill on the zombie hear a second voice, and you recognize this voice,

it's your patron, the demon who grants you your spells. And he says, you're giving me that soul, right? Yeah, I mean, that's a good, no, no, no, no, no. That seems like a fair, no, he gives me my spells. That's like a good, like, you know, you pick up a soul. I think you can get some good spells and return for that. I give you your magic for a reason

so that I get something in return. May I have that soul? I mean, what do you, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta teach the lesson. What are we gonna do with the soul whereas like I could help me, which ultimately helps us. Yeah.

So we're cool with just giving a child soul to some mystery voice in Hank's head. The child, he gives me my stuff. He shouldn't go exploring my blood. He's my plug. He's my plug. He's exactly right. All right, Hank, do what you gotta do.

He's the plug. And you do have an addiction. You gotta support the plug. Okay. As you agree to this, you put a bookmark in this moment. I'm asking, whatever you guys think I don't know you're right you need your spells you are right you need your spells

You're not you're nothing if you don't have spells. I wouldn't yeah, I literally don't know what I would do without them right There is almost this vision of a hand back in into in your vision and you know you shake the hand and as you do you hear the voice Thanks again. I'm going off to heaven, oh, what's happening? What's happening? Oh, no! You hear flames and then chuckling laughter, echoing throughout your mind and screams, and then it all goes wild. 100%.

You're spills up. Oh, and Hank, you also can write down, you have nine extra hit points now. Whenever you kill an enemy and reap their soul, you gain an extra nine HP. If you wanna pass one, boom. And just hand it over, child soul. What are you saying?

They're like very, very good turn. You said it was like inspiration. What do you want to get out of the, what like, what is there? Part of the deal is you keep getting your spells. Yeah, I'm sure you can do some like card tricks and shit later. I mean, plus nine HP. Yeah, I'm sure you can do some like card tricks and shit later. I mean, plus 9 HP.

Yeah. No, that's one for a soul. And you gain 9 HP, you gain all your spells, and your patron also says next time fire eldritch blast, you get two of those actually. No, steady your light crossbow. Are we all aware? Are our characters aware of what Hank's doing right now behind her back? Technically, all you know is he just killed a zombie for you.

Okay. So he's having his own little private conversation. That is correct. That is happening in your mind, Erlik. And Garlic. We also know. Like right now. You can roll an insight check to see if you know.

And then just keep up the soul. On some level, yeah. It's definitely, you're seeing some effects. Six. Six, I would say you're not fully aware of what's going on in his mind. For usual. So I mean, our goal of entering the cave

wasn't necessarily to save the kids. It's kind of just to find out what's happened. We kind of knew when their bodies never turned up and we had discovered this was a necromancer, we were probably not gonna be saving anybody, but we were gonna be laying them to rest perhaps. I don't think that our plan was to find these kids and send them to hell.

It was probably to let the people in. That's the way. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No one said it was hell. They just go into my dealer's house. No, you said a demon. A demon. Where do you think a demon might live?

Dude, you never know. You never know. Maybe you should start to support his family. That's the only way he knows how. He's gonna redeem in time. Yeah, but like there's good demons too. You elevate the issue to the proper people. Your hands are clean, right?

You know what, I'm not gonna rule insight check because I know. It's definitely gonna be damn. You already know what Hank's doing. Yeah. The fact that he's a warlock is probably enough, honestly. Yep. Okay.

And Gargable, that would be bringing us to your turn next. The zombies are slain now So this ambush this trap waiting for us in the doorway this cave has been neutralized up ahead You can see a locked door on the right and you can see a tunnel on the left What would you like to do? Um as a cave dweller, right? Yes I want to go spur-lunking down the tunnel. Yes, 100% you can, absolutely. I will let you, are you doing this stealthily? Are you doing it very aware and carefully?

Like are you making, you can make a perception check or a stealth check as a bonus action as you're kind of moving ahead? What do we think? I kind of just want to barge down that tunnel, me and the hippo. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

The only thing is just that where there is enemies everywhere. I don't know. Yeah, Bob, and then we've got two big signals from each side. I just don't want a situation where we cause a noise and then everyone just kind of surrounds us. But maybe they fight each other. Right. I don't know if they're all on the same team.

So we have enemies above us to the sides and the dragon. And we child soul. I'll say this, you think you've eliminated the enemies who had registered as being above. It was the zombies we just took down, but you know that the undead dragon signal was coming from ahead and on the right. The other powerful undead signal was coming from ahead and on the left. I think we'll judge it towards the deep end. The left door.

The left door is the lock door. Locked door on the right. I do not know. I don't know how to get the chance. I feel like it might be significant. Locked door. Locked door on the right. And that was where the dragon signal was coming from. Oh, the lock doors on the right. I want to go down the tunnel to the left. Absolutely. Yeah, I think that could be other signal. I think that could be the necromancer

who's pulling the strings. Absolutely. What if it could be the kids? It could be another kid that Hank could self get more stuff. We haven't ruled out one of the kids being the Necromancer by the way true We need to keep Hank away from children. No, no Feeding of souls. I don't think we would like Hank if he if he needs his fix

Yeah, he is gonna get grumpy in about 20 minutes All right, so I hop on the hippo any tiptoes All right, so I hop on the hippo any tippedos stealthily down the tunnel. All right, you're using your bonus action to be stealthy. Go ahead and roll the D20 plus six to see how stealthy you can be. The hippo is tippedoing. 16. 16, absolutely. And that's before the plus six.

That's a 22. You can tell that as you're tippedoeing down this tunnel, you're reaching this network of different tunnels. It's like there was an earthquake here or something that caused a bunch of cracks in the rock and sort of a star shape. You're heading towards this nexus of different tunnels, most of which you can tell are not real tunnels. You can see two of them already that just end in dead ends, but you can't tell which

are real tunnels and which aren't. But you know, you're not alone in these tunnels. There are creatures that seem to be fighting over bones and pieces of flesh. I'd like you to make a nature check to see if you can identify what these creatures are, and you get an extra. Actually, you have advantage on this because they are obviously some kind of undead.

So you can roll a D20 plus, I think you have a plus four for nature, is that right? Yes. Absolutely, roll a D20 plus four, two times, to see if you can identify what these creatures are, and see what you know about them. 17. 17, absolutely, roll one more time,

just see if you do any better than that, but that's already a 21 total. 17. 17. Absolutely. Roll one more time. Just see if you do any better than that. But that's already a 21 total. 16. We'll ignore that one with the 21. You know what these are and what the danger is. You are seeing a pack of no fewer than four. And you can tell that there are creatures, undecreachers. they're kind of like the vampires from I am legend or like the fast zombies from 20 days later. Have you ever seen that? Absolutely, 100%. They're all pale, Maggedy flesh, mouthful of jagged teeth,

black gums and long claws growing out of their hands. You can see one of them crack a leg bone open. Let's start with a long black tongue trying to eat the marrow out of it, and they're fighting at each other, especially the little one. The new ghoul who recently got converted, there is a tiny little child ghoul who is fighting with the other three ghouls to get little morsels of flesh. Now you know the danger here is that ghouls

have a paralyzing touch. If you are alone, they can very much gang up on you and if one of their claws manages to paralyze you, you're frozen in place and then they just drag you off and slowly devour you. But there's an opportunity here also. You know that ghouls are one of the few enemies that will get distracted by a piece of a corpse

thrown in their direction. They may prioritize that over actually fighting enemies who are fighting them, but also if they take you down, they will focus on eating you rather than fighting your teammates. So that's also a danger potentially. Now, most importantly, they haven't noticed you yet and you still have your action, you and your hippo. You could charge them in attack or you could do something else. Yes, I think I'm going to say hippo chomp because I don't think they'll be able to break the

hippo skin and paralyze it. Okay, yeah, there's possibility they won't be able to get through your hippo's armor class maybe. Yeah, totally. Yes, so I'm going to send him ahead. I think one hippo can take three goals or four. There are four goals in a fall. I think that's a solid matchup. Absolutely, 100%. I'd like you to charge with your hippo. Your hippo is gonna have advantage on this attack roll because he's surprising these goals.

Roll two D20s and take the higher number to see if your hippo hits. Seven? Seven might not do it, but roll one more time. Oh no! All right, people. Seven. Seven might not do it, but roll one more time. Oh no, our IPR. No, no. Oh no, it's this. It's this.

No, I'm gonna say that your hippo probably has a plus five to hit, which means it's a 12, and that is just barely a hit against the goal of the dot, just barely hit. Yeah, because animal handling, I have a plus six. There you go, absolutely. You're great at training your hippo, I think you I have a plus six So you go absolutely your graded training your hippo I think you would have a plus five to hit then okay, so I would like you to please roll 2d6 plus three damage that's the cube shape die you want to roll the square the cubic die two times Add it up and then add plus three

Okay, four, four. Ha, ha, ha. Armors make it a little tough as natural. There's an conference there. Seven total plus three is gonna be a 10 total against where you're aiming for the child ghoul or one of the adult ghouls. One of the adult ghouls.

One of the adult ghouls takes 10 points of damage. It is injured, but it is not dead. Just yet I am sorry to say it is maybe halfway dead as your hippo chomps onto its like, oh, it lets out a howl of it. And then you still have your action. You could rush into melee with your hippo and stab one of them twice, or you could stay back and shoot two arrows at one of these ghouls. I'm going to shoot arrows because at one of these ghouls.

I'm gonna shoot arrows, cause I don't wanna get paralyzed. Absolutely, go ahead and roll a D20 plus, I know it says plus nine there, but since you're a melee specialist, it would actually only be plus seven for you with your bow, but still very likely to hit. Roll a D20, that's actually a D12.

So ignore that one. You wanna roll a D20 plus seven. 16 plus seven is gonna be a solid hit for one D8 plus three damage. So go ahead and roll that damage. The D8 is that yellow die just next to the green D6. Yeah, eight plus three. And were you attacking the goal

you had already injured with the hippo? Yes, you finish off that goal. Goal number one is down immediately Three goals left including the child goal. You still can take another shot Do you want to aim at one of the other goals and let loose another arrow? I'm kind of on a roll right here. So yeah, absolutely Which goal are you shooting at a child goal or one of the adult ghouls? I don't know.

Do we want to give Hank his fix again? Tim, is it possible with a ghoul? Can we redeem a ghoul? A ghoul is intelligent enough. You can talk to it, but with that role, you've never heard of a ghoul being redeemed before. You would think they can be reasoned with, but they're so hungry all the time.

It's like a vampire. They have an uncontrollable need to feed. I feel like we gotta kill that ghoul. Can we make any of them our ghoul friend? You could try to, certainly. You know it would be very difficult though, but not as impossible as with the zombie. The game in pulp fiction, we could like,

a little bit. We could put him in a box and let him lose when we need him. If you feed him little morsels of flesh, you can make a goal do a lot of shit. Sounds pretty hot. Absolutely, yeah. Great. Thanks for doing it.

What did you ever say? So with that last shot, are you taking that shot or are you holding it off? Because you want to like... I'm taking the shot. I'm just trying to shoot him for the legs. I'm trying to, I would like to talk to this guy. Absolutely, and you're aiming for an adult goal, is that right?

Or the child? Let's take out the adult goal, and then we can figure out how to corral the goal. Okay, yeah. We're gonna make him our pet. Headshot at the adult goal. Absolutely, let's see if you can get him in the head. If you get a 20, then it's right in the head.

Roll a D20 plus seven. Oh, Jesus. Now, you were ambushing them though, so roll one more time. You have advantage on this. Hey, big guy, can you put my armor back on? I guess you can. What's that roll? That's eight.

Eight plus seven would be a 15, that is a hit. Now I should have given you advantage on the first one, so just roll one more time, just to make sure you didn't get a 20 on that first one, but you definitely hit with the second one. I just wanna make sure you didn't get a 20 on that first one But you definitely hit with the second one. I just want to make sure I didn't just deny you a critical hit Since you're talking about headshots. Okay, never mind. I was just making sure that first one wasn't a critical hit You hit with the first and the second shot so the second shot is gonna be one D8 plus three damage. Okay All right, oh yeah, so yellow one again. Yeah, that one next to the D4. The D8.

The D8 Bingo. Right here. D8 plus three. Cool. Okay, that's gonna be five damage on this ghoul. So you've got three ghouls left. The child ghoul and two adult ghouls, one of the adult ghouls, you got them. You were aiming for the head.

It winged his shoulder, unfortunately, and did not quite get him halfway dead yet But he's close and that will be Gargable's turn Gargable very good stuff that's your move action and bonus that is gonna bring us to The goblin and the ogre next I love the squire situation. We got going on here Great turn goblin. Yeah, absolutely now the goblin and the ogre are kind of watching what we're doing, talking amongst themselves, and what appears to be the goblin tongue, but they're not helping us out right now unless somebody wants to shout at them to help us. So unless I hear somebody shouting at them, they are just going to kind of ready their action

to do something else on their turn. And in fact, I'll just roll to make sure they... Oh, and let me see how well they're hiding this. They're doing a very bad job hiding this. They're getting ready to betray us. While we're fighting the ghouls up ahead right now, you can tell that the ogre and the goblin have picked up their weapons. And they're taking readyed actions because Norm, you ran ahead, no one's keeping them pinned down anymore. They reach for their weapons, they pick up their weapons, she doesn't ever knife, but she does ever short-bow now, and he has picked up his club. They're getting ready to ambush us, but only once more of us have gone ahead to go deal with the ghouls.

And we know that because they have done a terrible job hiding it. So that is gonna bring us to the ghouls turd next actually. I'm sorry to say the ghouls, look up. They start to like almost unhinge their jaws, like the vampires in blade a little bit, like their jaws start to split open. And they start to rush toward you. They are each gonna make claw attacks. The ghoul you injured.

Ooh, manages to get a 15. Can I ask, what is your armor class? Actually, sorry, that's a 17. What is your armor class? Oh, no. My armor class, where would that be? Oh, sorry, that would be at the top of your sheet. Just 16, I'm sorry to say that is just barely a hit

for the first ghoul, and that ghoul is gonna be dealing total of six points of damage. Can I ask how many hit points do you have normally, Gargobool? 52, I think? 52 health points. 52. And that means with six damage, you are now down to, let's see, 46 left. And most importantly, I need your roll of D20 plus one to make sure you are not paralyzed by the ghouls' claw. So please roll against paralysis, D20 plus one. Where was the hippo during all this? The hippo? Actually, let me just see if the neck, this first person is going after you.

We'll see if the next school goes after a hippo. I kind of assumed the hippo would have jumped in front of that attack. The hippo would, I would agree with that. The hippo's trying to. We did it. Yeah. All right, is this the 20? Yeah.

The D20 plus one. Huh, what did you roll? An eight. An eight plus one is a nine. That is not enough! Right now, Gargable, you are paralyzed by the ghoul's touch. And that means that the ghouls are trying to rush around your hippo to get to you I will let you roll a D20 to see how good a job your hippo does blocking these

Yeah, well they do you got a roll a good roll to get prevent these ghouls from getting around the info mode Not enough the ghouls almost like one jumps onto the ceiling and scuttles along the ceiling. One leaps off the wall, jumps over your hippo. They both land next to you. And now since they're attacking you paralyzed, they have advantage and they're not using their claws. They're opening up their jaws to take bites out of you. The first, ooh, the first attack is gonna be a hit with an 18, the second attack is gonna be a hit with an 18, the second attack is gonna be a hit

with another 18, I'm sorry to say. I'm gonna break out my phone's dice roller because there's too many dice to roll at this point. The first, the first goal is dealing 14 points of damage to you. That is gonna knock you down to, I think we just gotta let these guys... 32 left. And then the last goal is, and this is the child goal,

unhinges its little jaws, and is gonna be dealing 13 more damage to you. Ah, they just start flensing and flaying the flesh off your bones with their jaws that is gonna bring Them down to you down to 19 hit points left. I'm sorry to say your hippos bellowing out to your teammates It's trying to get them to come save you and you can see the problem The other look at each other with a smile. It took your name personally. Okay, so but while I am paralyzed I can still ride the hippo around. You're still on the hippo's back. It's true.

I would say you're still just frozen on the hippo's back. You can't really ride it. In fact, Roll 1D20, as long as you don't get a one, you're still on the hippo's back. There's a mess I gotta clean up. 18. You're on the hippo's back securely. She, mode is keeping you on in their backs.

It's like an electric scooter for an old person that year. Erasco. It's like that, that, that, that, that. And Norm, that is gonna bring us to you next. What would you like to do? Okay, so we got some issues. We have a lot of issues. You guys have a paralyzed navigator.

We've got a paralyzed navigator. We've got an ogre and a goblin that's about to attack us from behind and and The ogre and goblin is next to Erlich Where's the over? Yeah, the ogre and the goblin would be right now right behind Erlich I would say and Wayne and they would actually be right and I'm on top you're up top You would have to jump down to go save him, but you could do that. So what do I do? Do I go save Donnie or

And you guys handle the ogre in goblin or do I come down and handle the ogre in goblin? You know what? I'll ride with Hank. Hank you mean you're like Erlich you want to take out this ogre in this goblin? Let big cat deal Donnie. Yeah, I mean, I don't know why Why Norm to just take him out earlier, but I guess we can, we can, you guys, you guys, you guys told me that we need, I tapped them out. Devide and conquer. Hope Donnie. Donnie's a diver. Yeah. Help Garbergul. How many guys you want me to kill for you? Well, so far, you've killed zero. So that's not true. I mean, maybe starting with one. Tim, correct him. Uh, you had taken down the first zombie. Yeah. And I did sell his soul to for spells.

I just killed him because I was trying to help the squad. So correct that. Well, he's already dead, so I don't know if that counts. I don't know if you're killing his zombie counts. That absolutely counts. So what would you like me to do, or like you want me to go back and save you yet again? No, I think me and me and Wayne can handle all right.

All right, so I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go save my boy Donnie and his hippo. Absolutely, you rush in and you can sure enough see that this group of ghouls has surrounded and paralyzed your ranger. You can aim for the one who is injured or you can aim for the child ghoul who looks a little weaker.

Who would you like to go for? So there's three ghouls? Three? Once it full strength, once injured and then once a child ghoul Okay, I think I got to take down the one that's full strength absolutely go for it do ghouls like if you take if you kill a couple ghouls Does the other one freak out they might get scared it is a possibility that you Let's go let's finish off the injured one

Then I'll kill the child and then the other guy will hopefully run like a pussy. What 100% you can do your first attack and I assume you are going reckless, is that right? Always 100% you have normal advantage now you can roll 2d20s and take the higher number. 10. 10 is already very good. 12. 12 so with the 12 plus 6 that's an 18 solid hit against the ghoul. You were attacking the full strength.

Well, it's attacking the injured one. Oh, the injured one. Absolutely. Go ahead and roll a D12 plus five to see if you can finish it off. Five. Five plus five is 10 more damage. The ghoul's up to 15 damage.

It looks like it's about to go down. This injured ghoul you slash across its chest. Black blood sprays everywhere. It slumps against the wall, and then slowly picks itself up off the rocks. Ah, he's getting ready to attack you at as a few hit points left. One more attack would definitely finish it off.

Roll another D20, and you have advantage because you have gone reckless. So you can roll two times. 20! 20! Don't worry about rolling again. you can't do better than that. Roll not 1D12, but 2D12. Nine?

Nine, and then you can roll another one. Four. So 13 plus another five is gonna be 18 damage, and were you attacking the injured? Oh yeah, I was just off the injured one. How would you like to splatter this ghoul to pieces? What does it look like as you kill this ghoul with extreme prejudice? I'm destroying it.

I want to hold it by its hair and have it lock eyes with mode and be like, this is for mode and Donnie and then just slash its throat. Absolutely, you slash its throat and as you do so, the ghoul is watching as mode Thanks to your critical hit has the opportunity to put its head underneath And Liz gobble up all the blood is pouring out of the ghoul's head It's still like looking as this is happening as the light fades from its eyes And then the hippo tries to arm chomp eat the head Oh, would ghoul blood be like an antidote to the paralysis Good question the hippo then attempts to spit that blood into his mouth

I'm gonna give you a free saving Yeah, I like that Roll a D20 plus one to see if you can create the Parallels yeah, what's some venom back in you that reverses the paralysis. All right. Okay, so what is your rolling? I want you to roll the D20 plus one. If you roll very well on this, you break free the paralysis.

If you roll very bad on this, then ghoul blood turns out it had the opposite effect. Oh no. 13. 13 plus one is enough. You break free of the ghoul paralysis. Well done. That is fantastic.

And that was some quick thinking right there. You have managed to free your compatriot. You have finished off or you have there we go. Yeah, finished off ghoul number two. There is still one adult ghoul and one child ghoul left. And you have your bonus action. Because you are raging and you have your bonus action. Because you are raging, and you are a berserker barbarian, that means you can use your bonus

action to either attack one more time, a third time, or you can use your bonus action to try to intimidate the last two ghouls, whatever you'd like to do. I'm an intimidate them. I'm trying to get them a fuck outta here. Absolutely. You have advantage because of the critical hit you just did. They watched the ghoul get completely obliterated by you in the hippo roll two times and take the higher number. 17. 17 is already very good roll one more time so you do need better.

11. Okay, and what's your intimidation bonus? Uh, intimidation bonus plus one. Plus one. Okay, so in 18, I'm gonna roll for each of these ghouls. The first ghoul is just barely still sticking around the adult ghoul, but the child ghoul, I will roll with, ah, perfect.

And I have disadvantaged, but I've already rolled a one. The child ghoul starts to run away. Nice. As the child ghoul starts running away, you can take a free attack against it if you want. Oh, kill a child was back turned to me. Maybe we gotta take him out. Yeah, yeah, fuck it, fuck it.

Plus he's got that blood and then we can get another vaccine. Yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. You can roll two times on the D20 roll to hit this child ghoul 14. 14, attack of opportunity. Okay, 14 plus six is a dirty 20. You absolutely are hitting D12 plus five damage against the child goal.

11 plus five is 16. And the child goal runs away. You just hack along its back, splitting it in half. The two halves of the child goal fall, Darth Maul's style, just flipping through the air, splatting onto the ground and then you hear in your mind a voice norm and it's a much younger child and a small child. Thank you. You saved me. I'm free now. I'm not a cool anymore. Thank you. I can go on to what's waiting for me. So that's the other child. Here's my friend. Where's my friend Andrew?

Hey, hey, he's a zombie. Why is he not up here? I can see the light, but I don't see my friend. Where is he? He's in hell. He's in hell. Why? No, no, no. He's in hell. No, no. He's in hell. He's in hell. No, no, no. Who would have done something like that? Who would have done something like that? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, and then suddenly it starts to corporealize other people can see it. You break for your paralysis and you realize

you and your hippo can both see this ghost. It flits towards you kind of like ghost of Christmas past style. And as it floats up to you, this little kid goes, where's the guy? Where's the guy who sent my friend to hell? I want vengeance on him. Yeah. Do you point him in the picture?

Oh yeah, I'm like, yeah, I was early. Absolutely. What does he look like? Do you tell him what he looks like? He's got purple hood at all. I thought you were working a turn on him. I'm not turning on him, but he asked me a question. What am I supposed to say?

This is just remembering a fact. Right, I'm not saying anything. I'm just letting him know. This goes to him. Do you know what I'm gonna say that? Is gonna go right before your next turn, Norm. Oh, it's fine. I'll go out to deal with this kid instead of helping you guys.

I just saved Donnie's life. You said I couldn't do shit. And that would mean... I'm trying to, you know, cause I have to go out to find a gun. So far, me and you have consequences for your actions. So far, again, actions that were meant to help the kids. To help the kids and save my life

and Hank has just sent one kid to hell. Yeah. Who then is coming back to get us? Well, that guy was the one that damaged you. I killed him. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team.

You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team.

You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got help the team. You got one goal left. Am I in the room with the goals? You are not in the room with the goals. You are also sorry.

There's one goal up ahead who they are still fighting who's gonna probably go after Norm because he went reckless. I can handle it. But you also know the ogre and the goblin are about to try to turn on us. What would you like to do about that? That's a good question.

I have a bunch of stuff I could use here. I could do hideous laughter. Yes. You could also come and could do hideous laughter. Yes. You could also come and finish off the school. Is it possible? You could definitely go to finish off the one and then Erlock can just catch up. Just like I'm doing.

Like I'm on that man. Or I could disguise myself to look like the child that he just sent to hell and I could just haunt him. That's true. And remind him of everything that he's done. Yeah. Yeah. And I'll kill you. You're gonna kill me? Well, we have a true, a him. That's true. And remind him of everything that he's done. Yeah. Yeah. I don't kill you.

You're gonna kill me? Well, we have a true. You look like a true. All right, all right, you know what? I want to kill Hank. He just said he was gonna kill me. I have to defend myself. I'm just saying if you can,

I just can't. I have to stand my ground. You just told me that you were gonna kill me. I can't do it. If you look like an enemy, I'm going to kill you. Tell I want to disguise myself as an enemy. You can do it.

And I said if you look like an enemy. Hey, as soon as I look, it's your turn. Thank you. You know what I'm going to kill you. Tell I want to discuss myself as an enemy. And I said, if you look like an enemy. Hey, I'm sure it's an earlick. It's your turn. Thank you. You know what I'd like to do? Remember this. I'm not going to attack you. I want to do hideous laughter at ogre and the goblin

so that me and my good friend earlick can make it into the next room where nobody will turn on him. Absolutely. If you do hideous laughter and they fail their saving throw, one of these two enemies will be taken out of combat for good until they pass the saving throw and stop laughing.

Let's move. Who would you like to target? The ogre is easier. You can tell. I'm gonna take the ogre out. Absolutely. Let's see how the ogre can do. Do I tell them a joke?

How does this work? Yeah, what do you say to make him laugh? I say, hey, ogre, have you heard about this one? Have you seen the news? What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? What? I can't pay 20 bucks to have a garbanzo bean on my chest. And you see the goblin just started to like shake her head and she's just like and she whispers in his ear immediately He starts bursting out laughing and because you did a vicious mockery to him He has disadvantage on this because he hasn't done any roles since vicious mockery

So I'm gonna roll two times take the lower number prim that is I'm gonna take that one because that's a minus two That's an eight that's a minus two. That's an eight. That is a failure. Oh, you mean poopoo. I didn't like your joke. You mean poopoo. He's very like of the slapping his knee. He doesn't get it. He doesn't get it. He doesn't get it.

He's not a good audience. He's woke. He does. I seem to really get it, but he is bellowing out his laughter. And it's filling up the woods right now. Let me just see if anybody No, nobody comes bothered by that noise, but you can tell he's not able to fight anymore. The goblin is freaked out She's like mo gra mo gra come on mo gra. She starts to shake him She's not able to get him to scramble laughing and you can tell she doesn't want to attack us without the ogres help

She is too scared of you now. Good. Good. Now that is your action and you can tell she doesn't want to attack us without the ogre's help. She is too scared of you now. Well done. Now that is your action. You can use your move if you want to move anywhere and you can use your bonus to inspire somebody here or give somebody a healing word if you want. Healing word would restore hip points.

Whereas inspiration would give somebody a bonus on a particular role. So where's Donnie at right now? I think I only have paralyzed. 19 health points left, right? He's hospitalized. He is, well, he's not paralyzed anymore. He broke free of that.

Okay. But I'm, I'm still very sick. Yes, you are. But I'm here to help you. You're giving me a feeling word or you can give somebody inspiration. I'd like to give you inspiration to him. Can I do that? What?

Like, let's go. Let's go. Um, Tim. Can I do that? What? Like let's go, let's go. Tim, you could give inspiration to the ogre or the goblin, but they're not on your side right now, originally. I just want to guess you up, Tim. You could inspiration the ghost kid who is floating around.

Those are the people I'm in control of, right? Can I, what about the ghost kid that's in hell? Can I bring him back? Can I inspire him? I'll let you inspire him 100% he's still like He's a little bit you give him inspiration. I'm gonna let you roll a D20 to see if you can free this kid from hell Whoa, hey, that's a really good roll with a 19 plus whatever bonus you would add to this I'm gonna say it's gonna be paid you pulled it off

I need you to take away those nine hit points. Thank you do not have those anymore. Wait, it has been free. So wait, just I'm just catching up here. So I've killed two ghouls and a zombie and Hank has killed no one now. I mean, he has killed a zombie that was containing the soul of a kid. The zombies not back but the soul that he claims no more claim. And his patrons, your patience pretty mad right now. I was like, what happened? I just couldn't look myself in the mirror not being able to save this kid. And suddenly you get this vision of this kid flying up to Mount Celestio. Oh, thanks. I appreciate it. I always do this for an angel. Oh, they're friends. This is Andrew who you just saved. And his friend Mikey and him and Brace in Mount Celestia.

And a great story. Do you want to try to like get this ghost kid no longer chasing Erlik? Or do you want to tell him that he still has to chase Erlik? You know what, we're on the same team, Erlik? I'll tell him, hey, back off I'm sorry, my friend's got an addiction. It's not like him doing this.

It's the disease that he carries with him. Absolutely. You see these two kids celebrating on sunny pastures and they are like, thank you. Thank you. We're together again. You freed us. We appreciate it. He's no longer seeking vengeance against your warlock friend. Well, that is a big, big win. And that is your second, your third use of inspiration. You have one more use of inspiration today before it runs out. But very good turn, Wayne. That is going to bring us to Erlich's turn. Oh, let's take a quick break for an ad.

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I was going to use that to take out the ogrere with the ogres on the ground laughing uncontrollably I took him out the ogre is not fighting right now. It's true. You're welcome Okay, and the goblin isn't fighting anymore now that the ogre has been neutral I just I just got pink would of yeah, I wanted to So are they completely removed from the equation for a are they still the ogre passes a saving throw which he gets to do at the end of his turn? Okay. So then I would like, I guess,

I mean we can do, use my skill, do some investigating, look up ahead. You can tell up ahead without an investigation check, they're still fighting one ghoul left. So I should go up there and help them out. Absolutely. You can see down that tunnel, the one Google is about to rush up to norm

and you can fire Eldritch Blast, Pupu at this guy or you could launch a more powerful first, second or even third level spell. What would you like to do? I would like, well, yeah, I mean, I'll send a fireball. That's an option. You could send a fireball. So the level three fireball.

Here's the problem. Unlike cake the wizard, you cannot do, you cannot avoid a friendly fire when you launch fireballs. If you launch a fireball into these tight quarters, you'll hit the last ghoul. You'll also hit both of them and the hippo mode. Don't do it. It is more powerful than your Eugish Blast, though.

That's fine, Hank. Well, I'm only a Eugish Blast. Absolutely, 100%. Your Eugish Bl Blasts though. That's fine, Hank. Well, I'm only going to have Eugert's Blasts. Absolutely, 100%. Your Eugert's Blasts ultimately the total damage would probably be more or less the same as long as you hit with both of them. You fire off these beams and your patient says, I mean, I'll give you the Eugert's Blasts

but I expect souls in the long term. And you're part of addiction. Roll the D20 plus five to see if you can hit the goal. 16. 16 plus five is a 21. Let's just roll that second attack right away. See if you pull that off too. Two.

Oh, I'm sorry to say that second beam is not gonna be hitting, but you can roll for that first beam, a D10. It's gonna shape a little bit like the D8 and it's got a zero somewhere on it. That is the 10. Eight. Eight. Eight, eight plus three, I believe, is what you have.

So that is 11 points of damage on this school. It's exactly half way dead, but unfortunately not completely dead just yet. It is a close, but not quite dead, and unfortunately missed with the second blast. Did you want to put a hex on this ghoul for additional damage? Could've asked him to bonus action.

What if I use Lola the imp to attack? Oh, yes you could! You can have Lola fly forward since you haven't done anything with Lola yet. She could be invisible right now. You have her fly forward, cackling. She lands on this ghoul, and she can sting the ghoul if you want. Do you want to do that?

I would love to do that. She would have advantage because she's invisible. Roll a D20 plus five two times. That's a 10? 11. 11 plus five is a hit with a 16. Now here's the good news. She's gonna deal 1 D4 plus three damage. The bad news is ghouls are immune to poison, so no additional poison damage. But that'll be the D4, the pyramid shaped eye, plus three. That'll be whatever numbers on top. Four?

Four, there you go, plus three is seven. That is enough to finish the ghoul off just barely. We're good. Just things right through its neck, it slumps to the ground, starts to get up again. She keeps stabbing it through the neck again, it slumps to the ground again, and she just keeps finishing it off finally. Last ghoul is down, well.

That's right, you killed a ghoul. You're first ghoul? Well, I have to. His amp killed the ghoul, not that. Yeah, not that. And then Lola, the amp looks over at mode. And she just kind of puts up a little fist to give him a little pound.

This is beautiful. Would Lola give a little pound back with his, yes, absolutely, the hippo and Lola can make a difference. Pound the nose of a fist bump. Yeah. Absolutely. And then she tries to go like,

and like tries to, as soon as she realizes he's friendly, tries to hop on his back. Do you allow her to do this? She's a little winged imp. Well, I mean, if she has wings, I don't know really why she needs to hit your eye on the load. But there's room.

Absence, there is room. She's very tiny. And I don't want to get on the imp's bad side. So I'm gonna let her perch on the hippo with me. Absolutely, she perches on the hippo's back and she grabs the mode's ears since it's like playing with them a little bit in a slightly annoying way.

But mode just rolls their eyes a little bit. It doesn't seem to mind you. It's like how in Africa, there's always like a bird riding on the back. Very much so. Absolutely. Yeah, it's like perch right off the head. And you just see the scorpion tail

that this imp has sort of like massaging along the head Like you could sting I won't but I could Tim I have a question. I obviously this is about you know protecting my friends making sure they're safe, but What's up with this dead soul this dead soul sorry the the Was it the it's gone man? It's gone. It's just die Sorry. The, the, was it the, it's gone man. It's gone man. It's gone man.

It's Andrew, we got it all. It's all, it's all, it's all. Mikey was the ghoul who got killed and went to Mount Celestia. And then Andrew was the zombie kid you killed. And then you would reap his soul until his soul got freed essentially by the, the ghoul I just killed no soul.

No soul, I mean, it did have a soul, but it's been a ghoul for so long and it wasn't a kid so it didn't really that's how I was worried about I'm sorry though you did kill an enemy so you did rep us all you get nine hip-hop Looking for actually looking for a fix and your patron is like well That's that with that person when they were alive was kind of a shitty individual about typical to end up here And you hear someone grumbling in the background like where the fuck is Like where's the fridge around here and you hear your patron go?

There's no fridge. It's hell go burn in the fire and you hear this guy like all right fine And that was that guy was apparently not very nice when he was alive as a human relax Sancus a little early in the day for souls I had a lot of soul. I was just curious. I didn't want it. You're sold out. And if you need it, you do have those nine hit points that your patron just gave you for reaping the soul of that individual.

But Ehrlich, great turn that is going to bring us to Gargable's turn, Gargable. What would you like to do? The ghouls have been defeated now. And actually, it's perfect that it's your turn because right now, there are no enemies. There is the locked door that we passed by, but then we also know there are many tunnels and we don't know which of them are real or which of them aren't.

You could use your bonus action to make a survival check to tell which way you could go from here or you could double back to the locked door, whatever you'd like to do. I'd like to keep working my way down the tunnel. Absolutely. And can I also tell Hank that the imp is now mine? Oh, yes, you can say that, 100%. Yeah. Your imp is now mine.

Is that how that works? Yeah, it's got a cut. The imp says, yeah, totally. But you know your imp is lying. That's not really how it works. But you don't know, he's stronger than your imp. He could grab your imp and just like crush it. Like, yeah, for sure.

Yeah, I don't know. That'd be just sweet to have like a flying animal. That's cool. Is an imp in animal? It's a human animal. It's not an animal. Imp is a kind of a little demon creature. A devil that sits on your shoulder.

The moment you say this imp is mine, and he goes, oh yeah, totally. She flies up in lands on your shoulder and says, listen, I give great advice. You should listen to what I say, and I'm'm gonna help you out. We're buddies now. Okay, so we're gonna do that Survival check to figure out which tunnel to go down roll the D20 plus six to see if you can figure out which tunnel is real and which are dead ends Hey plus six is an 18 that is enough that you can tell a couple of things. First of all, most of the tunnels here are dead ends, except for two. You were coming from the east, and now you know two tunnels go forward.

One is a tunnel to the southwest on your left-hand side. That tunnel goes on for a long time, and you can see lots of footprints come and go from that tunnel. And then on the right-hand side, on the northwest, there's one set of footprints come and go from that tunnel. And then on the right hand side, on the northwest, there's one set of footprints. They're not zombie footprints, they're not ghoul footprints, just shoes that go up a set of steep stairs on the right hand side, on the northwest. We're gonna follow the one set of footprints.

Okay, absolutely. You start to go up these steep stairs. You think you're going forward 10 feet and then up like 20 feet. Up the steep stairs, almost like a ladder and you find yourself reaching a solid doorway. You're surprised because it has a lock on it, but the lock is not locked.

And there's like iron bands on the store. You would almost call this like a vault door kind of, but it's not locked right now. Would you like to pop this door open? Yeah, absolutely. Pop the door open and in this small room, you see three things. One is a window against a wall that is shaped like an arrow slit.

Perfect for you to take a position at and shoot down into a much larger room and you can hear just barely a voice coming through that window of someone, ah, yes, skeletons, yes, work faster. And then you also notice in this room two identical chests that are locked, one on the left, one on the right. What would you like to do here? You still got your action. Okay, do I have any way to open the chest? You could try to open the chest? You could try to pick the lock.

That would be a D20 plus three for you and you know you need to get at least a 15 or higher. So not that easy. Or you could just run over and try to bust the chest open with an athletics check or use your sword to hack it open. You can even have your hippo rush up and knock one of the chests open if you wanted him to. I feel like a hippo walking on a chest.

Absolutely. That's going to snap. 100%. The hippo would be very good at this. Do you want the hippo to charge the chest on the left or the chest on the right? The one on the left. The one on the left. Absolutely.

Your hippo charges that chest. Roll a D20 plus five to make sure your hippo can hit that chest with full speed of his weakest spot. 13 plus five is an 18. That's a solid hit. Roll 2d6 plus three. As long as you can get a eight or higher, you break enough of the lid to reach into the chest.

2d6 plus three. That's the d6 bingo. Five. So far is great. Roll another one. So far you dealt eight damage. Boom, nine points of damage. That's enough that you don't completely break the lid off, but you break a hole in the

lid. The hippo runs over. Chumps, the lock off the lid and breaks the whole locking mechanism off. There's now a hole in the lid. You can see gold and gemstones. You think there's a thousand gold pieces worth of treasure inside of that chest. And you now can reach in and start taking all the gold out

if you want to with your action, or you can do something else in this room. But so far the hippo has used his turn. You've got your action now. Okay. Now you also said there's that window with the arrow, but if I shot an arrow through that that would that alert the person in there? Certainly would.

I would. But right now you do have the element of surprise. You think whoever is talking down there is not looking up at the window at the moment. They're like 20 feet below you right now. Okay. That's your sum out there? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So golden one chest.

Do we think there's something more important in the other one? Yeah, I mean like is gold of any use to us? We can bring it back and buy healing potions magic weapons with a thousand gold. You could do a lot. Okay. We're gonna share the gold. Can I take a swing? Can I send the hippo at the other chest or no? You can't send the hippo, but you could take a swing at the other chest. Definitely. I feel like that chest might have something we really need. I'll take a swing.

Absolutely. So you're just walking up to the chest, you're gonna smash it open. Roll a D20 plus six to see if you can smash the chest open. You hit it as long as you get a 10. Seven. Oh, is that a seven? Yes.

Plus six is a 13 that's still a hit on the chest. Congratulations. You can roll 1d6 plus three damage. Remember, I'm right behind you, Donnie. So we can deal with this. Yes, yes. Now the goal is probably what the ogre and the goblin were looking for, man.

Yes, they were saying they were looking for treasure. Yeah. Four. Four plus three is seven. You deal seven points of damage. You start to hack the chest open, but you're not completely breaking through the lid just yet with seven points of damage. You just need to hit it one more time.

Roll another D20 plus five because you do get two attacks on your action. 16. 16 you are not. Absolutely. Then strike the lock and locking mechanism off the chest. It breaks open and you can see the chest on the right is filled with rocks or some reason. Just ordinary rocks. And that is when you notice that this chest is part of the floor.

It is installed into the ground, and you're only noticing that because just below the chest, you think you can hear little wheels turning, and then you realize it must be a pulley system because in the wall next to you, there are more wheels and gears turning, and then you realize they connect to wheels and gears in the ceiling, and that is when you look up and realize what seemed like a secure stone ceiling has wires holding rocks in place. But then suddenly the wires begin to break, booby-srap, this room is collapsing in. I need you to roll a D20 plus five

because you're actually very good at this. It's okay, you've already saved me on some free of the collapse. Roll a D20. D20 plus five, you need a 13 or a half. A 13 or a half. A 13 or a half. Or else the whole ceiling is gonna fall on you.

Or at least most of it. Okay. Okay. I can hide underneath mode. Are you using mode for cover? I mean, I feel like that would 100% kill mode. That would. Yeah, we'll see.

I need to roll higher than a what? You need to get a 13 or higher. I need you to tell me in advance are you using mode for cover? Before you roll. Because mode will give you advantage on this. You'll get to roll two times, take the higher number, but that's sacrificing mode.

Otherwise, you need to roll and mode needs to roll. If you're both trying to jump to freedom. I think we got a sacrifice mode. Oh no, no. Oh no. Right. Are we gonna need mode? I don't know.

Moat is a valuable purple. You got Lola on there too. You're just taking her out as well. That's true. Lola is on here and is gonna need to make a jump for it. Can they all jump underneath Lola? They could, yeah. If you jump under a mode, then Lola will do the same.

But no, they could mode and don't. No, both colors are low. They're low. You can cover up Lola, but Lola can't cover up you guys. Just too tiny. Okay, I'm gonna hide under mode. I'm gonna hide under mode. Please roll with advantage and I'm gonna start rolling damage. Oh 11 so far plus another

617 damage is gonna finish off mode, but let's see if he is saving you from that Fuck you get another roll seven another roll. Thanks to mode now. Thanks to mode. Thanks to mode for mode Let's let's hope her death was not in vain That will put me in a tough spot. All right, here we go 11 11 plus five is a 16 that's enough that you are not taking any damage but mode is crushed underneath the rocks as you pick yourself up is crushed underneath the rocks. As you pick yourself up from under the rocks, you can see that the ceiling is now real.

All these rocks have collapsed down onto mode, looks up at you, and mode has never spoken. The common tongue before, but mode just, and you know that mode is like saying, like be good as mode then. Oh my God. I'm so surprised. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty.

I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty.

I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty.

I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. suddenly Lola folks her head out of the rubble as well and she says ah well so it goes and You can now well, sorry that was your action and modes action So that is your whole turn then gargable and that is gonna bring us the ghouls are dead The what did you think was better than gold? I don't know dude could have something that answered like all of our questions super gold. Yeah, you never know

I don't know, dude, it could have been something that answered all of our questions. Super gold. Yeah, you never know. Is it sort of potion? Like it over-hack? It keeps laughing. The ogre is not breaking free of your spell. That's gonna bring us to norm next. Norm, you heard a collapse. And you're aware, gargable, you heard from the window.

What's that? What's going on up there in my vault? And it sounds like someone down in that room beyond the window is angry. Norm, I've got an idea. Okay. You know, Erlick's over here, Jones and for souls. As the ultimate team guy, I would like you to kill me to feed Hank's soul habit, to make Hank even better.

I don't need a soul. And more power. Oh, he needs to go to Peloton. Yeah. Got it. Yeah, yeah, okay Can I offer? Well, can you kill himself can I offer up my soul? Can you kill themselves? So I don't waste my turn wait, you put his soul inside my hippo. Oh Enemy

You could I let you roll for it. Yeah, totally Sacrific you're killing it. Yeah, totally You're killing yourself I'm like Christ. Yeah, and to put your your soul into the body of the hippo to save the hip Yes, I'm like absolutely help the team roll roll for that This will be a religion check. Yeah, 20 I was unless you got a 20 or higher, gonna say absolutely nothing happened with a critical hit, Wayne, you take your own sword, drive it into your own stomach

and we literally see your spirit, leave your body, fly over to the hippo, enter the hippo's body, and suddenly, not only are you in the hippo's body, you wake up, and you can do all the things you could normally do. You can talk, you can cast spells, you can do everything, you're a wane, but you're in the body of the hippo. Okay, congratulations. So we should see, and now my voice sounds like, who would make a good hippo here?

My voice sounds exactly like Max, even though it's me. Yeah, that guy. Yes. Yeah, you'd make a good hippo, Max. You're now, Max, you're over here. Yeah, you're a hippo. As a hippo, as me being a hippo. Yeah.

You're gonna get in the hat. Yeah. I had sunglasses. Wait, stand up. Let's see if you'd make a good hippo. Turn around, turn around. Yeah, I think it might be a good hippo. Well, let's ask Tim.

Tim, do you think that you've never met Max before, right? Do you think Max would be a good hip hop? I think that this is a juvenile hip hop and not a full-size hip hop and it's a medium-sized hip hop. You're like all of us in this room and so perhaps could qualify, yeah, absolutely. Oh, you're wearing a pink shirt too, it's perfect.

Getting the vibes, I love it. Okay, all right, so we got a hip, we got our hip hop back. Absolutely, the hip hop has returned and that was on I'm so now all right, so we're it's a room full of Full of rocks. Yes, so you know that there were two ways to go He went up the stairs and the room was full of rocks But you could climb over the rocks to get to that window if you wanted to okay Or you could take the other tunnel that he did not scout ahead. You tell me because I fucked you.

So you tell me what we should do. The other tunnel had a lot of footprints. I feel like we're gonna run into like a horde of ghouls. Okay. But I feel like that dude on the other side of the window could be a vital character. Okay. All right, so let's do the window.

Absolutely. You climb up the stairs, you go through the open doorway, climb over all these rocks, and you get to this open window. It's narrow, but you could just barely try to squeeze through it, especially you'd be good at it, because you're good at athletics. And you can see on the other side of this window, a ledge with a ladder leading down 20 feet

to a room the size of almost a football field. Maybe like a volleyball court sized cavern here, very long, and you notice that the far end of this cavern is a tunnel that must connect to the other tunnel you didn't take. So we didn't take the front entrance. We're looking down from the side, but you can see the front entrance,

and you can also see another tunnel that seems to be on the other side of the room, and you don't know where that tunnel leads, but right next to that tunnel, maybe 20 feet below you just ahead of you, is a human figure with a zombie on other's either side of him. And you see these zombies are swollen up with green gas inside of their body. They're kind of like stumbling around, almost rippling like big water balloons kind of and this human is wearing robes That indicate that he went to wizard school He's still wearing his wizard student robes, but it's clear these robes are tattered this guy got kicked out of wizard school

Probably for performing necromancy. Okay. He's giving orders to the two zombies Well, who's up there in that vault? What's going on? Wait you! Who's that up there? Skeletons, and he snaps to his zombies first, but then he snaps to the skeletons, and you see three tables between him and the front door,

where skeletons are hard at work, stitching zombies back together. All the skeletons look up at you. They begin to draw bows and knock arrows to point in your direction. And then he calls out, everyone, we have intruders. And that is when we hear the locked door. We never opened, cum bursting open.

And we hear the roar of something that sounds like a very tired dragon. Oh, no. Come roaring from that locked door behind us. So I walked in on a scene. Yeah, I got there's a lock going on here. And you can see this necromancer is about to run for the tunnel that you don't know where it goes while he leaves his zombies and skeletons and dragon to deal with us.

What would you like to do Norm? Okay. Do I waste a move if I can, can I beckon the whole crew to me? You can, I would say because they'd already, that's a free action, totally. Okay, so I want all my boys. You call back to your team. Yeah, I want all my, I want Erlik, I want, I want, uh, mode, the hippo, I want Donnie, I want everyone with me. So we're like I want, I want, I want, uh, mode the hippo, I want Donnie, I want everyone with me.

So we're like the Avengers, we're ready. Yes. Absolutely. We're going to form up everything. Gathering to where you are. I feel that. I feel good about that. Okay.

Let's talk this through. I think I have to kill, I have to go for the fucking, uh, main guy, the Tattered Wizard guy, right? Yeah. You can fold it. Do you have any stealth? Because I think he set up a defense or it's like you can't get to him if you try and just go like this but if you have some type of stealth it's too late for stealth but if you were to jump through the window you could feasibly land right

next to the necromancer by jumping over his zombies if you roll well you won't take damage and you'll land right next to him and then you can still do the attack against him. All right, so let's do that. Good call. 100%. All right. Good roll.

D20 and you have advantage on this. This will be the rest of your move. 19. 19 already very good. Roll one more time just to make sure you don't critical hit because I'll give you advantage on your attack. 18.

Okay, with the 19 plus six that's a 24, you take no damage. You land right next to the Necromancer. He's going, what is the, my undead minion? Show what the hell, what the fuck? And he's, you land next to him. He didn't expect you to get so close so quickly. He says, my undead will protect me.

No, no, and he's trying to stumble away from you, but it's too late. You can go reckless against him, and you can roll two times on this next attack. Five. Ooh, that's bad. That's not ideal. Three.

So, five, but you have a plus six on this as you swing your grade acts down upon him with an 11 total. It's about to hit him on the shoulder. You think he's trying to dodge out of the way. And then as it's about to hit his shoulder, major armor appears on this illusory armor floats around him. This greenish armor appears as a shoulder plate and deflects the attack.

I'm sorry to say just barely barely but you get a second to time You can roll again with your action two times 16 16 so far so good 12 12 so we'll take the 16 plus six is it 22 you get him right across the chest this time, roll one D12 plus five damage. Okay, let's go boys. Do it for Wayne mode. Ten. Ten plus five is 15 damage against the Necromancer.

You think in a single strike, he may already be halfway dead. He roars absolutely not, so this is unacceptable. But what he doesn't know is you're a Berserker barbarian. You have a bonus action still. You can intimidate him or you can take one more attack again. What do you guys think, guys? Fuck him up, kill him. So do we need to learn anything from him before he's killed?

Not necessarily. This guy is behind all the missing children, all the missing disappearances. We might want to interrogate him, but that's up to us. Yeah, let's kill him. I mean, yeah, do you think if we kill him, all the other zombies are going to die? So you think that might be the case being undead hunting. Yeah, I'm mentality. Okay. so what am I rolling here? Final attack, you have advantage on this roll, 2D20's an add plus six to the higher one. 13. 13.

Okay. I'm gonna grab my hand. Two. Okay, with a 13 plus six is a 19. You know that his major index dirty are not enough to protect him. You're swinging it right at his head. And as the ax comes down upon his head at the very last minute,

he claps his hands and casts a shield spell that protects him, bring his armor class up to 20 on the dot. You miss by just one point. He stumbles backwards and says, protect me, my undead minions. You dare hurt me. Your life force shall fuel my power and your corpse shall serve in my army and he is going to roll into initiative now. You do not roll very well, but what you can tell he is doing on initiative count four is he starts to conjure up dark energy in his hands and

he kind of makes the horns a little bit and then suddenly his two fingers grow into vampiric fangs that he's trying to swing it your neck as though you drain your blood but he doesn't get to do that yet Wayne would be up next. Our hippo who's now hippo. Our hippo would be up. Yeah, all right. We need a big roll. So the hippo looks up and in theory, what would you like to do?

You could jump through the window to charge it the necromancer if you like. I need to help. He's about to kill me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I gotta come. Absolutely. Please roll an athletics check for the hippo. That'll be a D20 plus five.

Are you sure you don't have like any plans to beat or anything? I do, but I can skip it. Okay, it's fine. It's fine. 11. 11 plus five is a 16. That is just enough to take half damage from the fall.

So it would just be half of this. Five points of damage to the hippo. It's not enough to take the hippo down though. You still have most of your hippo points. You have about 10 hippo points left still. So you land next to the necromancer. You're in melee with him. You can make one attack roll with your bite attack.

Can I throw this out there? Tim, so our hippo is kind of a special hippo. Really good at kissing. So smooching. Absent. And he has the zombie blood on his lips. That's true. So do you think you can kiss this guy to death? 400%. If you try to kiss him, I say you can try to deal damage

by kissing him and you can try to deliver the ghoul blood to see if you can paralyze this guy, perhaps. If you will, a very effective kiss attack. I'm gonna kiss this guy, sure. Absolutely, kiss him as hard as you can. Full hippo brute force. This can't not hurt to get kissed by a hippo. 17.

Yeah, I think that's great kiss. That's a great kiss, great kiss. Oh, right against the Necromancer side. That is higher than a 20, even with this shield running. A 22 is gonna be a hit against him roll 2d6 plus 3 damage and I'm going to roll his saving throw he's not paralyzed I'm sorry to say by your Google blood he is maybe inoculated himself a little bit against it but well because when when the hippo kiss me that actually made me unparalleled yeah

a very good yeah this kiss so this this kisso, it's called the kisso. This is a hitroll at Kisses. It's a hitroll at Kisses. It would be a shame if whoever's editing this on the green screen just made Max's face in a hippos face. It just goes around smooching everyone. Just got a one. A one is a bomb.

A one is a bomb. But you get one more. And a three. A three. A four plus another three is seven more damage against the Necromancer. The necromancer is badly injured at 22 points of damage, maybe one or two more attacks. We'll finish him off, but he's not down just yet nor is he paralyzed. And that is going to bring us to Erlix turd. Good kiss. Do you like to do? I think I think we just got to take this guy out. I know that, you know,

there's potential to cause some harm to the to the hippo and to Eldrick or to norm, but I think we got to do the fireball. I have to go for it. Absolutely. You're going for the fireball even though it's going to hit. To be fair, it's going to hit both of the zombies, but it's also going to hit norm and it's going to hit the hippo. You know, it's cool. That's great. That's cool. It is probably not a hippo I don't know about but yeah, we'll see The damage you deal with the fireball is not one not two not three not four not five not six not seven but eight Six would you like to call that my phone or would you like to roll that on physical dice? Absolutely Would you like to roll that on physical dice? All roll on physical dice. Absolutely. So what's your turn again here?

In theory, to kill the Necromancer. First of all, roll to see if the Necromancer is taking half damage or not. The Necromancer is not taking half damage. So finish up the Necromancer. All you need is eight hit points. You're gonna do it, but we need to see if you're also gonna be killing the hippo or not.

So unfortunately, that's a D20. It looks like you're gonna be rolling D6's. You're gonna be rolling eights of them. I would roll them probably two at a time or four at a time if you have enough. I got more D6's. There we go. There you go. Four. Excellent.

So add up all those and then do it again. Ooh, I see two. One, six, five, five. Okay, so. 17 so far. 1, 6, 5, 5. Okay, so 17 so far. Connor look. 4, 6, 4, 4.

6, 9, 6, 4. 18, 4, 13. 18 more. That's gonna be 35. The Necromancer and his two zombies are obliterated. It's like a grenade went off. They go splattering across the room, however, and to be fair, the poison gas inside those zombies

on a fireball burns up immediately. So your teammates are safe from that. However, HIPPO, I'm gonna need you to roll first as X-terity saving throughout. Question for you Tim, so if we were doing stats at the end, that kid would be mine, right? Like I was the one who loosened the jar. You definitely loosened the jar

for sure on that 100%? What? Well, I'm just saying I was the one who did the damage. To be fair, a 35 would have one shot than a tremendous, I'm gonna be fair, but yeah, absolutely. We'll let the people inside try. Hippo, go ahead and roll a D20 plus,

I'm gonna say plus three, because everything I've heard is HIPPO is a very agile, so roll a D20. It's a super agile. Super agile. All right, here we go. Six, six, I'm sorry to say is not enough. Even with the spirit of the bard infusing you,

you explode and are slaying again for the second time. So deal with this, that evil, that evil, that I would then get the hippo souls in the bard soul. Yes, you do reap the soul of Ehrlich. And to be fair, you didn't get the original hippo soul because that soul was already dead, but you got Ehrlich's soul because he was in the hippo.

So he just killed Max? You killed Erlik. You killed Wayne. You killed Moe and I keep saying Erlik. You're Erlik, you killed, claimed Wayne's soul. Yeah. So Wayne's soul has now been said, your patron goes,

Gimmy Gimmy, do you offer Wayne's soul to your patron? I mean, I would like to give him an offer to negotiate you know, negotiate for himself, but he left us. And my guy is hungry. I'm kind of feigning. Don't worry, I'll treat him very well. Says your patron and Wayne.

Yes, something down there. Yeah, yeah. All right, that was good job, hippo. Maybe most importantly, all I did was smooch and then die. You died twice, sitting, sitting. Norm, can I ask how many hip points do you have right now? Were your hip points normally? I have 64.

64, you can survive this then. Go ahead and roll two times, because thanks to danger, since you have advantage against fireballs. So, what two times to see if you can take half damage. And you have a plus two on this. What die? a D20 15 is already enough, but let's see if you can crit 12

Okay, with the 17 total you take half damage from that so the only damage that you are taking norm is half of 35 which would be 17 I believe yeah, so you take 70 points of damage, you're not dead, though. And you saw the Necromancer explode. The moment that happens, and his two zombies explode as well, you suddenly see all the skeletons who had knocked hours and pointed them in your direction. One of them shakes, drops his bow, his arms fall off. One of them falls over onto the table and collapses, and one by one they start to fall apart. Ice.

Like jenga towers. We can hear more skeletons from the locked room collapsing, and then we hear a creature getting closer and closer. A zombie dragon comes bursting into the room, lets out a roar, and then collapses. Dead to the ground, right in front of Norm. Well done, we have defeated the necromancer of Lance Rock. Everybody, all you did it.

And we saved the kids as much as they can really be saved. We saved the kids. We just had to sacrifice a hippo and Wayne. That was a small price of pay. We've never gotten to the end. What do you do now? Do we get like a prize? In theory, we not only got to the end,

we got to the treasure as well, because we found the 1,000 gold pieces that were able to dig out of the room full of rocks now. And if we go down that other tunnel where the Necromancer was gonna try to escape to, we find an altar dedicated to the one-eyed God of death, Vecna, but also on that altar is his spell book. And you know, Ehrlich, that a spell book like that

might be very valuable on the open market. Cake, the wizard would love to get that spell book. So he would find it the most valuable because he can copy all the spells from that spell book into his own spell book, but you also know that somebody would pay probably at least a couple hundred gold for that spell book as well. And you find that that was in his,

that altar was in his bedroom. So you can go through the wizard's bedroom if you want to find other embarrassing stuff. I love this. But you have defeated the Necromancer. We did one last, I know we accomplish this. Great job everyone. Because the first time you guys have actually

had an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild.

Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. Yeah, we have an accident in the wild. You just cast a fireball as the finishing blow or like that means that technically Gargable would be up next gargable. Would you be involved in this deal? A little free man tool. Yeah, I'm kind of interested in taking this bell

But can learning necromancy myself and go ahead and roll the D20 to see if you can learn any necromancy yourself picking up Well, yeah, you gotta get mode back. Yeah, although mode Although mode exploded, can you bring an exploded head bow? Not impossible. Let's see how good it necromancy you are. 11? 11 is, I'd say roll one more time because you got the spellbook. It's giving you advantage on this.

Oh, and you hear the altar begins to speak into your mind. I can offer you secrets. If you roll with advantage, it's gonna be come, it's gonna be because the Lichlorid Vecna is helping you. 16. 16 is enough that by calling upon Vecna's help, you start to learn Necromancy, your hippo, he may live again in death.

And you know you can call him back as a skeleton using just his bones. You can not call him back as a zombie or a ghoul because there's not enough flesh left or you can call him back as a specter, a ghost of some kind. So ghost hippo or skeleton. Or bone hippo sounds like a sick friend of weed. Yeah.

I'm gonna go ghost hippo. Ghost hippo up here's the shadow of your hippo. Suddenly peels itself off the floor and becomes three-dimensional and it's spookily like a Dementor starts like move around and you know this thing can suck people's life force out of their body. Who do you send your ghost hippo after? I mean, it saves you a couple times. Yeah, you did. You also got me killed by telling me. No, you you did you also you also got me killed by telling me you didn't get you. You got my hippo killed and so the hippo is pissed right right and I mean so this is not me but the hippo personally wants to suck your soul

okay, yeah, I have nothing to do with it. Just that's what happened. Now he's gone reckless on his last turn. So as your hippo comes slithering over, go ahead and roll 2d20s and take the higher number to see if you can suck the life force out of norm. You're about to get slurped. Oh, no. It's a six. No. Now he has a plus five on that. So with an eight, the higher roll plus five is a 13. Norm, what's your armor class? 15 I think. 15 yeah.

Just barely a miss, I'm sorry to say. You're trying to pull his soul out of his body and ironically it's his like thick barbarian skin that's protecting him, which I imagine just means that he's very stubborn and his life force is hard to slurp out of his body. Or just like, hmm, holding your breath essentially, Northern avoiding this fate. Too bad, yeah, remember that.

But no cigar. I just wanna go, yeah, I just wanna go heads up with Erlich, like whatever, however it works for. It's like the end of Rocky III. Yeah, roll for roll, just you. It would be tortured now and then Erlich gets to respond. So you want to charge him and swing it in. Yeah, you get to do three attacks against him

and I assume you're going reckless. Oh yeah, yeah. Oh, wait, so. Now is there any reason you're fighting? Is it because you don't want to share the gold? No, we just, I just, I, you know, we accomplished our goal. Yes. Now I just want to see him down.

Yeah, yeah. It's kind of like when there's like a heist and then like at the end, you just, you can kill everybody else in the room. You can't even hurt each other. Yeah, roll 2d20s for each attack. Okay You get three of them in 14 so far. That's a hit 19 okay, definitely a hit on the first one just keep rolling d20s I want to see how many hits you're gonna get on early 19 that's already a hitch just make sure it's not a critical hit

18 critical hit still a very good roll and now your last attack On fire Damage that's three hits one of which is a critical hit you're going to be rolling four D12 plus a total of 15 damage so so far early has 15 rolling four D12 plus a total of 15 damage. So far, Eurlic has 15 plus four D12. All right, down each of the D12s is you roll. Seven. Seven on the first one. Five, yeah.

Two. Two on the second one. Eight. Eight on the third one. Eight. Okay, so 16 plus another seven is gonna be 23 plus another two is 25 plus the 15. 40.

Is 40, how many hit points you have? 45. 45, you have five hit points left, Ehrlich, you got five hit points. And then it is your turn, or sorry, Wayne, Wayne's out there. I'm just gonna roll the C.F.E. No, he doesn't. He's just no no help comes from the afterlife and to be fair you have

you hear tortured screams from Wayne or like what would you like to do? I would like to send back a hellish rebuke. Oh yes absolutely as a reaction before you turn even starts you do a hellish rebuke make a dexterity save you have advantage on this roll 2d20s take the higher number you need to get a 14 or higher on this 15 15 plus two is gonna be enough that you are gonna be dealing is gonna be enough that you are gonna be dealing. Yeah, I'm gonna be dealing.

You did nothing to me. Let's see, your hellish rebuke is gonna be D10s and it is gonna be, go ahead and take this D10 and start rolling. It's gonna be three of those in all, I believe. One, you can double check that. Seven, four. Four of those, so one, seven, and four.

That's 12 points of damage, I believe. And so 12 damage is not going to be enough to show off norm. I'm sorry. I'm sorry to say that. Not even close. 29 points of damage. Does he get weaker when he does a hella-shrubuke? No, it just eats up a spell slot. That's actually that's your last spell slot. Oh, I wish you had more souls. You do have your turn now. You only have Eldritch Blast as your powerful attack left. All right, let's do that.

Do I get the plus nine because of the soul that I got? Oh, you just... Oh, you have nine extra hit points. So you're actually not at five left. You're at 14 hit points left. So those extra hit points got eaten up. But you don't have five left. You at 14 hip points left. So those extra hip points got eaten up, but you don't have five left, you have 14 left. And you can launch to Eldridge Blast in his direction. You have

advantage on each attack roll. So roll 2d20s for each attack and add plus six to whichever the higher roll is. 13. 13 is gonna be a hit so far. Five. Okay, so that's a hit on the first eldritch blast and then roll for the second one. Five. Okay. Is it nine or six? That's a nine, yeah. So nine plus six is 15,

and your armor class is 15 on the dot, I believe, that's just barely a hit. So I have just a hellish rebuke, and there is on the dot, I believe. That's just barely a hit. So I have just a Hello Shrubyuk and there is actually a D10 I miss. So please roll another D10 for Hello Shrubyuk. And then we'll see how much, yeah, that D10, Bingo. Four more damage on Norm,

so Norm, you're up to 33 damage now. And then each of your L-gear blast deals, I believe 1D10 plus 3, is that right? Yep. Excellent. So a D10 plus 3 for the first L-gear blast. 3? 3 plus 3 is 6 more damage.

That's 39 on norm. Seven. And seven, and then before that's before the plus 3. So another 10 brings norm up to 49 damage. Norm, what hit points do you have normally? 64. 64, you're still standing with 13. And it's my turn.

Left, absolutely. And he's got how much left? Now, Gargable, it's technically your turn. Do you want intervene? I'll just do one V1. Yeah. Yeah, I'm just going to grab the golden leave. As you grab all the gold, you start to get ready to leave.

As you start to leave, I'm just going to see how they feel about this. The ogre is still laughing right now. The goblin is saying, that's our gold. What do you do or say? I say catch me if you can. Absolutely. And roll a D20 plus five and just try to beat a 16 and you will run away from the scabbling no problem. Keep in mind I am riding the Ghost Tipo like a magic carpet.

Oh roll with advantage on that then. Absolutely. Is this a D20? That'd be a D20. I like that one. 19. 19. You escape.

You are escaping with all the treasure on your ghost hippo. Well done, Gargobool. And that is going to bring us, let me just see if the Necromancer comes back to fuck around. That's weird. Nope, that brings us to norm next.

Oh, it's norm. What would you like to do? How many hits points do you have left? Not many, he's got 14. And Intercept. Let's finish him off, Tim. Absolutely, you can roll. If you're going reckless, you have advantage on this.

Roll 2D20s on your first attack. 15. 15 is already a hit. Let's roll the C if you crit. 15. 15, that's a hit against you. Roll a D12 plus five. Two.

Two. Two plus five is not quite enough. That's bringing him down to seven hit points left, but you got to hit him with another attack that means. Well, I have, wait, am I doing D20 or? Another D20, yeah. Four. Seven.

Seven plus six is a 13. What's your armor class? Uh, 15. 15 is not a hit with that Fairly amiss so you got one more attack is a bonus action got to get a 15 or higher real shame more or Nine plus six 15 on the dot. He's got seven HP left. As long as you don't roll a one on this, you're killing him.

Oh, oh, oh! Any last words, bitch? Any last words? One. One. Six. Fuck. With 11 points of damage, that is going to finish off Urlick and Urlick

I would tell you you could hellish review but you're out of spell slots at this point. Oh, that's a shame Now do I how does this work? It has been fantastic if I Kill the guy who killed the guy I get all those stats, too Um, I mean you are the last survivor here, so you get all these opinions points. Okay, you split the hit points between you, the experience points. What I put up between the two of you. I'm the world Chamberlain numbers. Absolutely, yeah.

Yeah, all right. Well Tim, this has been awesome. Absolutely, it's been delayed. Shout out how people can find you as always. Oh, 100%. I'm Tim with 2mswoods.com is where you can find all my social media. I just became friends with a bunch of D&D TikTok content creators

So please find me on TikTok and goose my numbers up So I can impress my friends and otherwise you can find me and feel free to reach out and I will have to run a new adventure Besides Necromancer of Lance Rock for the AWL's but whoever signs up first will get the first to be in the new adventure Yeah, I will be hopefully running for you guys in the new studio next time. Yeah, yeah. We will fly you out to the cargo. Yes, yes. Probably around like, uh, Christmas time.

Absolutely. I would love that. That will be a blast. Yes. We can forward to it. Okay. Well, Tim, thank you as always. Thanks for everyone for listening.

Thank you, Tim. Absolutely. Thank you guys. This is great. Love you guys. Yeah. Okay. Numbers. Memes is in studio. 6 9. Oh, there we go. PFT. Nice.

18. I'm going with 77. 26. I'll go 21. Sorry Billy. So we will be back on Monday. We back on Monday with regular episode. I think we're going to run Sam Donald on Monday. Great interview. Tighten you, great, great interview. So yeah, this is our sending you into the weekend episode. Billy, what's your number? The 69 you're taking? Yes. I'm going 76 for July 4th.

20. Okay, who took 77? I did. Okay, memes, have you ever gotten it? No. Oh, 46. 46. Love you guys. Take me on

Be here Be here Be here Be here I need you to say I'm all sitting in So far I've been telling my life every way So I'm willing to find peace out there Staying up to me

I'll waste a bit of time to be safe and so do N.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.R.A.R.A.R.R.A.R.A.R.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.A.R.R.R.R.A.R.R.R.A.R.A.R. I'll do the same for you Take me out Take me out Take me out Take me out I'll do the same for you I'll never be I'll do all the things I've got to do in my heart I'll die in all the things I'll come to you in the night You're all made up of time, I'm all yours I'm all yours

All the company that you're holding I'm all yours Take on the day I'm all yours Take on the day I'm all yours Take on the day Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,