Pardon My Take - Coach Mike Vrabel, Comedian Gary Vider Growing Up With A Scam Artist Dad + We Introduce Our New Intern

Episode Date: July 19, 2024

PFT pays off his perm bet and looks good (00:00:00-00:05:59). We then introduce our new intern Matthew with a backstory of where he’s from, what his interests are and an assignment he did ranking the Top 10 basketball players in the world (00:05:59-00:30:30). Caleb Williams signed and ESPN completes the top 100 list (00:30:30-00:42:07). Mt Rushmore of Pizza Toppings but we’re actually doing it for real this time (00:42:07-01:02:11). Coach Mike Vrabel joins the show to talk about what he’s doing now, football, could he beat up Luke Fickell, the time he stole time from Belichick and tons more (01:02:11-02:05:47). Comedian Gary Vider joins the show to talk about his podcast #1 Dad, growing up with a scam artist father, and how his Dad snuck him into MSG in the nineties dozens of times including the time he interviewing Michael Jordan pretending to be an SI kid’s reporter (02:05:47-02:57:14). We finish with Fyre Fest of the week (02:57:14-03:15:09).You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we have a packed, packed show. Our good friend, Coach Mike Vrabel on the show. Awesome interview with Coach Vrabes. Large and intimidating. Yes. We also have a very interesting interview with comedian Gary Veeder who has a new podcast out that everyone should go listen to called number one dad. Basically talking about his childhood, uh, living with a father who was a scam artist and he had these crazy stories. He snuck into MSG with his dad over 50 times. Awesome interview with him. We're going to try to do the Mount Rushmore pizza toppings for real this time. It's our third try at this. We tried it last year. We tried to run it back and and give Hank a shot at redemption. Hank threw it

right off the top taking spinach in the first round. Yeah. But I think Hank's really turned around. His attitude is much better. I was watching the old clip and Hank used to be just in a sour mood all the time. Yeah. Didn't want to talk. Didn't want to participate. All he did was complain that we ruined Mount Rushmore season. But now is the summer of Hank. We've got a new boy and he's chipper as hell. Different guy. This is going to be great. Different guy. And then we also have the introduction of our intern. So we're going to, there's an extra person in here, our new intern who we all are fond of. He's been in the office

for a couple days now, but we've kept him a secret because we wanted the AWL to see him first. So we'll finish then with FireFest, but we have an awesome show. It's brought to you by our friends at DraftKings. It's finally here, best ball week at DraftKings. Here's why it's a big deal. DraftKings best ball millionaire contest is the biggest fantasy contest ever. We're talking 15 million guaranteed prize pool with two, that's right, two millionaires being crowned for first and second place. If you're a set it and forget it type, then best ball is for you. No waiver wires, no roster management, bigger rosters. So injuries won't end your

season, only the draft. And that's it. You're set for the season. If you're still not convinced, check this out. This year DraftKings offering everyone a draft one get one special. Your $20 entry fee scores you a bonus ticket. I did two best ball drafts last week. It is the best format for fantasy because you draft your whole team and that's your team for the season. No ads, no drops, no trades. If a guy gets injured, you have depth because they're taking the best players every single week. You don't have to set a lineup. It's the best fantasy setup possible.

It's happening at DraftKings. Best Ball Week is here. Download the DraftKings app, use code TAKE. That's code TAKE for all customers who enter the NFL Best Ball 15 million millionaire contest to get a bonus ticket and get a shot at being crowned one of two millionaires. best ball week only at DraftKings. 777 or visit ccpg.org 18 and over in most eligible states, but age varies by jurisdiction Eligibility restrictions apply one per customer enter the best ball 15 million dollar contest by 9524 to get one bonus entry

$20 entry fee required reward expires at contest lock on 9524 see terms at draft kings.com slash DFS Okay, let's go. It's a part of my take, presented by Marshall Sports. Welcome to part of my take, presented by DraftKings. Best Ball Week is here. Download the DraftKings app. Use code TAKE. That's code TAKE for all customers who enter the NFL Best Ball 15 million millionaire contest to get a bonus ticket and get a shot at being crowned one of two millionaires. It's Best Ball Week only on DraftKings. Today is Friday, July 19th and my co-host looks like a poodle. Got the perm, baby. Yes.

Got the perm, finally, at Long Island. Now, I've wanted to pay this bet off for a long time. I was originally supposed to pay it off when I got the tattoo. Memes didn't book the appointment correctly. Not to throw memes on the bus. Don't point fingers. But if you were to point a finger,

it would be directly at Memes, but I'm not going to. I tried to reschedule it a couple of things popped up with travel finally got it done today I was the the first male top down what popped up. Yeah things popped up and things pop up up a travel Yeah, what are we starting off with a negative attitude? I'm just curious. I'm just curious things popped up to travel We had to I actually was gonna do it the day before beer Olympics But when we got kicked out, I scheduled it, then we kicked ourselves back in. Had to reschedule.

You didn't know Super Bowl week was happening? Didn't know Super Bowl, like the blindsided me, Final Four, also blindsided. I was the guy's first perm. So a guy in that slum had never done a perm on a guy before. Wait, was it his first perm or a first, first? It was his first perm. First same sex perm? First same sex first perm or same sex perm for same sex perm. We're doing it now.

Perm is perm in 2024. Thank you. Shout out to the people at Salon Sen, Sen Salon up north in Boys Town. Love it. Great place to get a perm. It does smell, though, with the stuff that they put in your hair. They don't tell you about that. They really stink it up for a while. Yeah, be honest. It looks like you just jumped in the ocean. Yeah. I mean, I've

got curly hair anyway. So this is I told him use the tightest smallest rods they could find. So long does it last? I think until I like wash it out. So tough. Yeah, no, I'm not going to wash out. I can see why you put it off for so long. No, I didn't put it off. Hank, you missed it. Meme screwed it up. If you're wondering why Hank might be in a bad mood, is because we're doing Mount Rushmore of pizza toppings today for the third time. We've done it twice. The famous first time we threw it. Well, we didn't throw it, we were just trying to help our boy.

Second time Hank threw it. Third time we're gonna do it for real. For real. For real, for real. Okay, so you got your perm. I kinda like it. Yeah, it looks good. I'll tell you what, cruising in the El Camino with a perm. Okay, so you got your perm. I kind of like it. Yeah, it looks good. I'll tell you what, cruising in the El Camino with a perm hanging out, it's a good look.

You're basically a time traveler. I'm pretty much from 1970. I'm living dazed and confused. Yeah, so we have a couple sports things to get to before we get to Mount Rushmore, but the other thing we have to get to, there's another person here, and we have our intern and his name is Matt or Matthew. Matthew? I'd prefer Matthew. Okay, great. Okay, why would you prefer Matthew?

I think I'm a little too fat for Matt. Okay. I think, you know, Matt's, you know, last six months they've probably gotten laid. Yeah, right. And you have not. Hey, you said it. Okay. You lose a couple pounds, then you lose the letters.

Yeah. Then you'll just be Math-a. But then what's the point? Yeah. Yeah. So when you came in for the interview, we instantly fell in love with you. I'm a little disappointed that you're not wearing the suit again, because the suit that you wore was a good look. Yeah. It was a good look. I got it. I mean, I can bring it any day.

Okay, so you got you got your one suit yet, Matthew We'll get your backstory real quick in a second and then we also give you a task Matthew Blew us away. He came in The wettest handshake of all time which by the way, I don't know if you guys shook his hand on Wednesday's first day Yeah, still wet still wet always damp. I feel wet Still wet. Still wet. He's our moist little boy. See, he had an upper lip that was just wet as could be. And then he sat down and we started talking. He is NBA Hole on Twitter. With a W. With a W. And we were asking about it and he said that he had an NBA podcast called

NBA Hole. But he then decided he was gonna you know, equal time here, we're gonna add the women. So he became an NBA hole with the W. And then we asked if we could listen to his podcast. And we're like, Hey, how many episodes have you done? And he's like, I've been doing it for a couple years. I got over 200 episodes like great, we'll listen to it. He said, well, I accidentally deleted over 200 of my episodes. So that right there was basically like, we need this guy. Yeah, we need you, we need you.

That seems like the kind of guy that would fit in real well around here. Yeah, and then I think he also had a, did you have another podcast? Yeah, that also accidentally fell in the same category of waste. Okay. That one, but yeah that one was more of like a just a whatever you know whatever floated in my boat type of podcast. Okay, what does float your boat?

You know just whatever is in I'm in the mood for. Yeah. I'm a big you know sports scene those are my hobbies gambling obviously big horror movie fans so I like to get into you know Weird, you know thoughts and you know, which killer could kill me quicker. Okay, okay You know type of thing which guy could I you know, do I have a shot against? Yeah Who do you have a shot against any wise? Okay. You're ready with that. I've never seen it Yeah, he well, you never need you never need to that IT. Yeah, IT. That scared the fuck out of me. I saw it way too young as a child. The first one?

Yeah. And I shouldn't have seen that movie. And I saw it, and it was the scariest thing ever. So Matthew, give us a backstory. Give us who you're from. What are you about? What are you about? What were you doing before this?

Just, you know. Yeah, I'm from Detroit, a little bit north of Detroit more specifically a small little town called McComb a high school we got a lot of Cougars out there because that's our high school name okay you know couple hot moms but you know not more young studs we're gonna win a state title this year oh we were like first place in the state you know like what a year two years ago you're asking you're saying it like we know we don't know. Yeah, what's With somebody else so we're talking like the football team they're going to win state this year in Michigan. Uh, that's the goal Okay, well every year I'm gonna hold you that I'm gonna be become very very

I'm gonna pay a lot of attention to the Michigan high school football you do it You're gonna be in it for a rude awakening You don't even know what team he roots for. Yeah, come on What if he roots for McComb? You're not gonna know I'm a Kalamazoo guy. Well, we have a rival. Yeah, I know Okay, who's the rival? Chippewa. Yeah, that's my team. Yeah, they went under a name change a couple years ago Yeah, now they're just the my team. Yeah, they went under a name change a couple years ago. Yeah, now they're just the football team Yeah, what happened? I think that the big Reds now, okay, that's almost worse. Yeah, that's that might have been the old name They changed

They won this title in 2019. So we're you know, we're falling behind them Okay, so you you're from north of Detroit, Michigan. Yeah. Did you go to college? Not one bit. I took one English class once. Where? At a community college in Macomb.

OK. Why'd you take one class? Well, I just wanted to get it tested out, see how I could do in the college life. See how I was working, so just let's add one thing, see if I can manage a class, manage the extra hours. Couldn't. Okay. The extra hour? It was about an hour and a half.

So what kind of jobs did you have after high school? So I've done, you know, lots of odds and ends. A cook, prep cook, laborer, non-union, you know, so just done it all. Good. Yeah. Yeah. Don't don't know what a union looks like. What does laborer mean? That's just like it could be anything. Exactly. That's the kick. Putting things down. Yeah. Giving birth. Yeah. Putting some drywall, maybe, you know, I'm the grunt work. So, you know, up and down the stairs, you know, I was the one carrying everything. So Randy didn't hurt his back type

of thing. Yeah. And then, yeah, like, you know, just helping, you know, I was the one carrying everything so Randy didn't hurt his back type of thing. Yeah And then yeah, like, you know just helping you know hold stuff get this Yeah, you know nothing skill that sounds illegal. Well, like hey hold this for me No, not hold this bag for me. Hold the ladder up Oh, I can install the light got it. Got it. Got it. That's a bowl. Okay Um, and yeah, just kind of stuff like that like that. Just I wouldn't say anything too skillful. But yeah, we got to get you together with Jerry. Oh, man. Jerry had a night last night. They are very good friends. Okay. Yeah, you remind me a lot of interest. You remind me a lot of Jerry right off. They share a lot of interest how much money I don't have to political interest Yeah, you're not gonna have to loan it. You're gonna have to earn it. Okay. All right, so so the the podcast that you started NBA hole Yeah, I kind of want to just call you hole. I mean, I don't know. I like Matthew for some reason hole Yeah, I think we're just a nickname company though. Yeah, I need nickname

I know but it's like he's a Matt guy and then Matthew's almost his nickname sir intern hole I think I'm going home. Okay With a W. It's so weird Or just like our guy home and we call memes That at how is introducing himself to celebrities like hey, what's up Hank? And he goes hey, I'm memes But we were just like what memes makes sense. He's a memes guy He's but saying memes to a another human being is weird saying it's like it's but that's the beauty okay all right we'll

work on let's not have a kid named pug also matt well he's a dog matt and max sound a lot alike matthew that's what i'm saying matthew i like matthew but okay we'll figure it out let's not we can't decide right now let's see how we go He's gonna do something stupid. So you started the podcast what inspired you to start your own podcast? I just love sports and I just you know I like a place to kind of go and talk about it and kind of Having you know funnel it down into a place where I I mean, I'll be honest like I've listened to my own podcast Like two to three times over what that's crazy. I wanted to understand So were you listening to your podcast so you had another podcast to listen to? Are you making your podcast? You had another

podcast. I was, I was making it so I could go back and listen to myself and learn how I like talked and my, and practice that so that it was like, you know, cause I can sit down, you know, hear somebody else talk and talk about, um, you know, I can sit there. There we go. I can sit there and hear somebody else talk and, and, and, you know, do all sit there, there we go. I can sit there and hear somebody else talk and, you know, do all that, but when it came to myself, I just wanted to, you know, actually understand how, you know, my beats and, you know, my emotions and, you know, at the end of the day, like, you could talk,

but then you're not listening back to what you filmed. It's going on a game tape. All 22. Except for you when you deleted it all. Well, listen, I already listened to it back twice Oh, I had all the information is there something that you listen back to that you you changed about how you did the podcast Like I just like certain like in and out of topics make it like how I would transfer it from one topic to another just making Sure, those transitions were a little bit better

understand it making sure that like There was a little bit more of a beginning middle and end to my points and not just a point that didn't know where it was going to fizzle out. So just being a little bit more prepared for those things. Not even necessarily writing it down, but just mentally knowing where to take that. Okay, so let's show everyone what you can do. So why don't you tell us your order of teams, your fandom order of teams. You can do college as well and then

transition into the first thing we asked you to do, which was we want the top 10 current basketball players in the world. So that's NBA and WNBA combined. All right. All right. Well, first off, I guess I'll give you my rundown of my teams. First off, as you can see, I'm repping them proudly. Defending, reigning, undisputed national champions of the college football world, the Michigan Wolverines. Okay. So the football team will go one. Dan Campbell and the Detroit Lions are going to have to take a nice spot at number two.

Number three, Shadley, my loyalty goes out to Tommy Gores and the Detroit Pistons. Four, Dusty May coming into Michigan Wolverine basketball, taking them back. I like that. Fab Five is going to be fabulous once again. Okay. Yeah, then Tigers and Red Wings, they're at the bottom. They're tied down there. Are you a Michigan man? I'm a Michigan man at heart.

What makes a Michigan man? Well, that's a good question. Hard work, and that's about it. Okay. What would you say to people who might call you a Walmart Wolverine? You're not a half wrong, OK? I think that's a fair statement, because I think at the end of the day, I think it's fair to say the Wolverines have a little bit of pride and prestige and, you know, a lot of doctors and lawyers go there.

Yeah. So when you never went to Michigan and you never even touched the university, but then you're sitting there saying, look at these boys. These are my boys. It feels a little you know, there's a little fucked up. Listen, I I Don't I don't prescribe to the theory the Walmart will over I think you should root for whoever you root for Matter if you were to say that about everyone that yeah here for every like SEC team. Yeah, it's stupid. Yeah Each you have a gatekeeping that stuff is the dumbest thing in my mind. So Alright, so those are teams. Oh Yeah, and then you know and but at the end of the day, but those teams are awesome

They are nowhere near as awesome as these ten people in and out of the NBA and WNBA And last we're gonna start with number ten The old man himself the man who's done it before and do it again LeBron James you think he's gonna win another title. We could wait. Are you a LeBron fan? I I like excellence Okay, okay, and he's been excellent. Okay, so you are Okay. Now, what do you think about him making the Lakers draft his son? It was disappointing. LeBron's a better person than that.

I think at the end of the day, sure, he's going to play with Bronny one day. I like that you're disappointed. You're actually disappointed. Yeah. What about... I mean, I always say a man who doesn't spend time with his family can never be a real man Well, that's what I always say. Maybe he was trying to speed line that process. Yeah, I'm bringing brawny to his team Yeah, so, you know just disappointing. Okay, just you know, make me look at him differently as a father. Oh, that's what else Oh, okay. Yeah number nine not are you dad? No, okay

And neither is this guy. I don't think Joe Ellen beat okay, I think he yeah, definitely is father 100% father 100% father Arthur is the name of his son. Yeah, I got a dog name more All right, so he's over kind of dog a Pomsky was that like a little That's the chief of staff for Coach O at LSU. A Husky. A Husky Pomeranian. Okay, yes.

Yeah, yeah. He's a little thing. Okay. Joe out, you know, dying, but you know, at the end of the day, is he gonna do it? No. Number eight. I like how he did that. That was a great like sports broadcaster thing.

You didn't even answer your own question. Is he gonna do it? And then just go to the next one number eight a guy who? Arguably, maybe you shouldn't be on this list But you made it That's why I'm arguing. Okay, you're with yourself love this, but he's probably the best ball handler in the world Magical some say Kyrie earth. Whoa. Yeah, I don't hate that at the end of the day if you're gonna if you want to win a game He can help you do that turns out more than joelle he was hurt at the end of last season He got uh you just got surgery okay. Well. He is Kyrie. This is there's a lot of big names left seven

Yanis, auntie to combo okay job. Yeah, great Greek freak He's you know a couple couple rough seasons and the Bucks are a rough organization right now But they're gonna be alright and if they have him they'll manage. Okay six obviously the man who still does it Stefan Curry, okay I think he just performed pretty well against Serbia. I think he was 18 in a couple minutes. Rivalry game, yeah. He's a great kid. Gonna keep doing big things.

Hold on, let me interrupt you for a second. Is that your accent? Is that a Michigan accent? Nervous Michigan, that is. Okay. You... Steph Curry's like... 34.

Yeah, he's like 10 years older than you, right? Yeah, he's a young guy. Great kid. Great kid. Not even 40. He's got a whole life in front of him. Number five, the man himself, SGA. Shane Gilders.

At the end of the day, he does great things. His ceiling is... He's blown my expectations out of the water. Number four, maybe a pretty controversial pick, Victor Wenbenyama. Oh, yeah. I like this this let's get him out there. Oh By the time this man can rent a vehicle. He will be the best player in the world Wow was that 25 Yeah, 25 we got like four years. Yeah, I mean to me the sky is nothing but a limit When you put it that way like that that it seems like he's about to be the best player in the world Yeah, say cuz you you would assume he'd be able to rent a vehicle. No, I can't can't now. Yeah, he will be three more years

probably How old is he? How old are you Matthew 25, okay, so you can rent a vehicle 20 years old five more years. All right Okay, so you can rent a vehicle. 20 years old, five more years. All right. Number three on this list. The only woman I wanna make clear, let's make it clear now.

Asia Wilson. Oh, good call. She averages 12 rebounds, two steals, three blocks. Four more points per game than second place in the league. Her EFF, which is her overall efficiency is nine more than the second place girl Wow And that's points rebounds assists steals blocks Together minus field goals and missed free throws okay internal Her I think herb her at being the best woman in the world compared to the second best woman in

the world, the gap is as long, as strong, as big as Patrick Mahomes to the second best quarterback in football during the playoffs, specifically the playoffs. Okay. Just, she is just, you're confident with her. You're you know, she is skillful. She's athletic. She's insanely talented. Yeah, she can do it all. You're not worried about what she can't do. You're worried about what she can do. All right. Against them. And she's gonna be. Yeah. Okay. Who's the second best quarterback in the NFL? In the. Oh, oh, during playoff time, I would take Joe Burrow.

Okay. All right. At the end of the day, you know. Good answer. He hasn't been, you know. Yeah. He's been injured. He's come back.

Number two, a teammate of a man we named earlier, Luka Dankic. Okay. You know, just what he does, his overall stat line, just impressive as can be. A little bit of a beer belly, but hey, I'm no one to talk. Same age, same age. A number one- Good kid. Number one, great kid. Number one, the best player in the world, Nicole Jokic.

Yep, I like your list. This is a solid top 10. At the end of the day, he's won, and that's the difference between him and Luca. Yeah, world champion. And you can argue Asia should be two because she has a title. So maybe I'm wrong. Do you want to make that change? Sure.

Asia's number two. All right, I like that. I can't find any holes, any gaps at all in that top ten list. I want it to be realistic. At the end of the day- Yeah, you have to be honest because- There isn't going to be another two or three girls on this list. Yeah.

You know, Caitlin Clark fans can shut the hell up. Oh, with that being said, 19 assists, that was incredible. Incredible. Incredible. I haven't seen something like that since Kirk Heinrich in NBA 2K06. Oh. But yeah, that's my list. I would rank your list very highly.

That's one of the top 10 lists I've heard this year. Yeah. Hopefully it's this year. Yeah. Hopefully it's the best. OK. All right, anything else before we talk some other stuff? Hank, do you have any comment on that? No, I think the only one that I would take umbrage with would be SGA.

Yeah? You're an umbrage taker. Who do you think should be on it? I think there's a guy who's the same age. Jason Tatum is not in the top 10. More NBA same age. Jason Tatum is not in the top 10. More all-NBA first teams. Jalen Brown is not in the top 10. More.

Yeah, well, I heard your list. I know that. I'm just saying, if I were to take Umbridge, it'd be with that. Yeah. More points per game, more rebounds per game. Way more playoff wins. No Anthony Edwards either.

That's fine. Yeah. All right, so and then you also said that you were working on Mount Rushmore ideas Why don't you give us two okay, and then we'll keep moving You by the way, Matthew said he he was working on Mount Rushmore ideas. He came up with some he found some He found some and split them. I don't know what that means. Okay, but he found somebody split them and split them. I don't know what that means. Okay.

But he found somebody, split them. So one I got, families to live with. The Mount Rushmore families to live with. Like you could do sitcom families like The Griffins, or like the Hutchinson family. Yeah. And just wake up next to good looking people. Oh yeah. You know, so families to live with are beefed up.

I don't hate that one. Yeah, that felt like that. Okay, so Hutchinson was right there with... It's a good family. Yeah, okay. Yeah, so Hutchinson was right there with... It's a good family. Yeah, okay, yeah. It's a very good family. Yeah, yeah, no, very good family.

This is a good one, missed shots. Oh. Much more missed shots. Yeah, that's kind of wide open. Yeah, a lot of missed shots lately, I'd say. Oh, okay. Yeah, missed shots being up there. I also got fat guy sayings. Oh

Okay, I like that For max and I'll have another yeah, are you gonna eat that? Yeah, you know, I could eat. Yeah. Yeah I'm not yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. Can we have so I hate pizza. I hate ice cream That's a max has been saying all week. Yeah Yeah, Hank, how could you call us fat again? Another fact I know or the one today Jerry walked in was like, oh, we got the big guys in here. Max was what is that supposed to mean? Damn max, but it was okay. Yeah, I was calling you my big boy on Tuesday night Yeah, that was good. Yeah, so that's my big boy. I did it's Jersey was too small. Yeah. Yeah, okay, Matthew

We're excited to have you You'll be helping out as much as you can internship for the rest of the summer Yeah, I was having one conversation with him yesterday that I told him to save for the show And now that I need to hear your coach Doug's critiques. He started breaking it down breaking it down He has a notebook. So I took notes on every game. Okay Breaking it down. Breaking it down. He has a notebook. So I took notes on every game.

OK. Just general philosophy stuff. Yeah, so it's actually just really impressive what you've managed to do. Feels like. Because somehow you performed worse on the second night. What? Even though you had more wins.

Huh? Which is actually impressive. No, this is good. This is good. Went ugly. You threw, I'm going to make this very clear, eight pick sixes last night. I played more games. You threw 16 interceptions.

Yeah, I played more games. I played five games the first night. I played what, like eight games the second night? You still threw 11 interceptions on the first night. Yeah, three of them pick six. Yeah four touchdowns Yeah, and I think these are all passing numbers, but I think there was only three touchdowns And I give you an extra one because I felt bad okay It was I mean it was just honestly awful Yeah, but I won the the the Cal game the first game you threw five interceptions. Yeah, I mean that's

That's a horrible way to start a season. Yeah, that was the first game that I played in the game Yeah, these are long quarters right? Yeah, these are yeah 10 15 minute quarters He should be running the ball more. Okay I mean that was the one thing I kept noticing is positive yards happen more times than not when the bog is in the ball Carriers hand. Yeah, but then you throw the ball and shit doesn't go low. Yeah. And you were the craziest part is on the second night you were staying in the pocket more. But yet you were more inconsistent with your throw. So somehow you learn from your mistakes but you didn't. Just so we're clear I'm the offensive corner. I'm not playing the game. Right. Well,

like the players play the game But the play call hasn't been great. Okay, okay, okay, you know forget it into it Okay, I did win I turned the season around won a bowl game, which you have yet to congratulate me on Congratulations, thank you on the best season wazoo is gonna have under you coach ducks. Oh wow I mean the roster coming in the next season are you poopies things I'm I'm realistic okay and I'm wanted to root for you okay but when but when you're missing reads yeah I mean I mean you could have be organ yeah game water that's what is the

second with their wiki yeah that you're talking about the first night though yeah first night I was bad it was just it was it added to the the badness on night, too Okay, if you won that game we you know skies the limit. Yeah, you could have got a three-star recruit. Yeah, okay I'll take that criticism rough. Yeah. All right, that's fair. Listen, I'm a big boy I'll be in the booth next season and I'm excited. Okay, I'm rude. I would love to see your notes after game I'd love to get you you you know, the feedback helps. Yeah, no, you think, you know, you need to listen to your thoughts more. I feel like you're, you know, you're just doing things. Yeah, no, that's true.

You just gotta calm down, breathe and take it one day at a time. Yeah. Yeah, that's facts. That's facts. Okay, so Matthew, I like that. I like that. Coming at tugs. I like that. So you you're gonna be there You'll watch the games the streams. You're gonna be with us for the rest of the summer. We'll see how it goes we're excited to have you and What else anything else for Matthew? No, I'm excited. I'm excited I think we're gonna have him be the world's first college football bracket ologist. Yeah preseason So maybe next week. Yeah next week next week do your bracket ology for the top 10. Yeah. Preseason. So maybe next week?

Yeah, next week. Next week, do your bracketology for the top 10. Yeah. Or top 12. And between now and the end of the show, think of a fire fest, OK? All right. All right, you got this.

I like Matthew. That's Matthew, our intern. Mr. Hole. Yes. There's got to be some people who applied, and they're like, the guy fucking deleted 200 podcasts and that's how we got the job. I like that.

We've got a guy whose only job is to press the button to publish the show. Now we have a guy whose only job is to press the button to delete the show forever. Yeah, yeah. There are also the video with all of the interns that applied will be coming out shortly. Yeah, and you'll see Matthew did sweep us away.

He was quite something. He had his suit on, and he looked. I think I called him John Candy, New Age John Candy. Yeah, like from Play of the Strings and Automobiles. Yeah, if you're watching right now, he's got a John Candy look that makes him very lovable. So we're big Matthew guys. OK, sports world, Cale Williams officially signed as a Bear.

Was there a doubt that he was going to sign? Oh, question. That's funny, PFT, that you asked that. If you listen to the lame stream media, Kale Williams officially signed as a bear. Was there a doubt that he was going to sign? Oh, question. That's funny, PFT, that you asked that. If you listen to the lame stream media, there was a doubt. The Florios, the Cowards, the RG3s of the world. Wait, are you talking about pre-draft? I'm talking about the entire process of...

There was pre-draft? There was in between draft and signing that people were like, oh, he's trying to get the Bears to agree to no franchise tag. He's trying to get the Bears to agree to no fifth year right now. We wanted equity. All these rumors were such bullshit because Caleb Williams doesn't have an agent. So you have agents basically saying, hey, Caleb Williams, if you had an agent. All this stuff wouldn't be happening. You should have hired me. But Mike Floreo, Colin Coward, RG three, the countless anonymous

trolls, all who said that there was 0% chance that Cale Williams is going to sign with the Bears that he was going to force a trade that he was going to demand ownership. Floreo said he was going to play another season at USC. You all look like morons. Cale Williams is officially signed as a bear. We now have a window and I would like an apology. I would hope Florio would be a big enough man to apologize. I don't expect it. Coward the same. Remember Coward said his father said he's no chance he's going to go to Chicago. All these people spent all this time and no one's taking him to task. So you've been taking a task and he's officially a bear and I'm excited. I think that there was a lot of talk going through the season about certain teams he

didn't want to go to and then for like a month leading up to the draft, then that ESPN article came out that was like, Caleb is down to play Chicago. Because it was always bullshit. I haven't heard any other doubters after the draft post draft. There were people who were saying he was trying to get the fifth year taken away and to get the franchise tag taken away. Like there are people and they'll move the goalposts. I had people yesterday telling me that Cale Williams won't sign a second contract. That's a let's have that discussion. It's just crazy. I don't listen to the flurries of the world. I listen to the boogers of the world an RG for your big war on

Booger McFarland he said today on get up don't be surprised when Jaden Daniels is the guy that they're talking about next year as Being like a CJ Stroud and Caleb Williams is the one being talked about like he's a Bryce Young So I'm I go with booger booger played in the league. Okay, that's my guy. Okay, he knows ball Windows open windows open. All right. What else you guys want to talk about? That was a dud So I honestly course I didn't hear it Ronnie hit a three he did finally Ronnie hit two threes. He had a good game 12 points and There's talk that they might shut him down After he had one good game just leave him in with a good taste in his mouth from summer league.

So I don't know if that's going to happen. But that was the big story. A lot of other people are pointing out that Alexander Sarr went 0 for 15 from the field, 0 for 7 from three points against the Blazers. You know what? You learn more from a miss than you do from a make. So I feel like Alexander Sarr has nothing but room for growth. Wait, so Bronny hit one, three.

Oh, I thought he hit two. Oh, he hit two? I thought he hit two for five. And one of them was clutch. He's on fire. What do you mean it was clutch? It was like the fourth quarter of the season. The agency?

No. Oh. I think they're all clutch. Yeah. Yeah, he is all clutch. We also had the list, the top 100 athletes, we called it correctly, Serena Williams was number one. Was she?

Yep. Fucking nailed that one. We forgot about Michael Phelps. Oh no, it was Michael Phelps. Sorry, Michael Phelps is number one. We forgot about Phelps. Serena was number two. Okay.

And then number three. It was Messi. Okay, Messi. Which I like that. That makes sense. And then after that, Tom Brady? It was two Serena, three Messi, four LeBron, five Tom Brady, six Federer, seven Simone Biles.

Okay. We didn't have that on our radar. Eight Tiger Woods, nine Usain Bolt, 10 Kobe Bryant. Interesting. Yeah. And then Novak and then Nadal and Ronaldo. Oh, so interesting. Messi's way higher than Ronaldo.

Way higher. Way higher. Where was Djokovic? Djokovic was 10. Did they have any horses on the list? I don't think they had any horses on the list. Nolan Voight. I do not think they had any horses on the list.

Steph was 14. Katie Ledecky, 15. Yeah, they did a good job of switching it up on us, because we thought it was going to be Serena. And then they went with the Phelps. We thought about Phelps. We also had Sam Pittman, Arkansas coach. He went in front of the media today,

and he gave the best quote of the offseason, besides Mike Gundy saying that he's driven drunk thousands of times. Sam Pittman said, our focus this year is to embrace the hog at Arkansas, which I love. That's a great slogan that you can put out there. Okay, easy to chant. That's what Bill Clinton's motto was for the state when he was governor there. And I feel like Arkansas might be back. I think

they're also back because they get to renew the rivalry against Texas. Yeah, which is bigger than a lot of people think like Arkansas and Texas hate each other. Yeah. And so we didn't get to see too much of that in the last couple years. But I know I like I like Sam Pittman. I'm wishing the best for the hogs embrace the hog. Yeah, it's and he's also got those big old breasts, big breasts. Yeah. And the gels. Yeah. Yeah. We're Sam Pittman guys. I would like Arkansas to be good. Oh, also Russell Westbrook. He's in the news today. Yeah. What happened when he was traded to

the Utah Jazz again, and they're going to buy out his contract again. He just gets, he's got the best career ever. So this is two years in a row where he will be on the Utah Jazz. I don't think they ever even thought about making a jersey for him. They should really do a retirement video for him. Yeah, welcome back. They should do a welcome home video for him.

He went to the Nuggets today. Yeah, so he went to the Jazz, they bought the contract out. Ooh, I don't like him. And then he goes to the Nuggets. I don't like that fit on the Nuggets either. Yeah, I don't like that on the Nuggets. OK, and then we had the Open Championship. Victor Hovland sucks.

Yeah, tough course. That was a bad decision by us with the whole death thing. And we're like, oh, maybe this will be. And then he was eating ice cream. That sucked. Yeah, this is tough course. We saw a couple people I think more coward did it where he hit a bunker shot and it just went around

the bunker and came back in the bunker. I saw that a couple times. Those are fun. Bryson's basically out Ludvig's basically out. Yeah, Tigers definitely out. He had that one birdie though which was sick. Yeah. And then Brooks had like a four hole span where it looked like Brooks is live. Brooks is dialed right now. And then Brooks had like a four hole span where it looked like Brooks is live. Brooks is dialed right now. And Bryson also had a moment where he corrected a reporter's English and but Bryson was wrong. I don't know if you guys saw. No, I didn't see that. He he said incalculable. Yeah. The reporter I believe. Hold on. Let me get the clip. I think the reporter said incalculable and he said it's actually in Calculatable or whatever in calculatable. Yeah, hold on ready Uncalculatable might be a word. Oh, but yeah incalculable is the word in calculatable I love the idea of Bryce and just correcting people and being wrong though. That's good. I like that.

Good for you. Did you see the plants, the bores? Is that what it's called? Yeah, that's what Shane Baker's one is called. That Shane was telling us about? Yeah. Have you seen the pictures of it? Yeah.

It's fucking gnarly. Yeah. It is crazy. It doesn't... I know that like links golf is supposed to be the best golf and everyone wants to go to You know the UK to play it, but it just never seems fun. No, I watch it I'm like what this the wind is always blowing its overcast. There's huge bunkers. It just doesn't seem fun Yeah, and the courses look like they were just like bombed out in World War 2. Yeah. They never repaired them. Yeah. It looks like the worst event to go to as a fan, as a spectator.

Yeah. Just sitting out in the rain and the wind the whole time. Maybe you guys love the course. I do, but I'm just saying, like- The course is fighting. Correct. No, these are good things for the course. Yeah, yeah.

I'm talking about like the experience of being out there in person. I the course like when I watched the Masters I'm like man I wish to go play Augusta that looks incredible when I watched the British Open I'm like I don't know if I'd want to play that and I obviously I'm not a big golfer so I get it it's incredible for golfers but like it looks miserable in the fact that if I ever got in that bunker I'd never get out ever in a million years. It's cheap over there golf is golf is cheap over there, which seems appealing. Well, maybe you have to fly over there. Yeah, but if you're right, that's true. How cheap is it?

Like 50 bucks, 100 bucks. But the flight. I'm saying though, like that in the hotel, Hank's thinking about moving. No, no, I'm not saying I just think that's a nice thing. Like they golf is for the people's for the people's Should we take a trip? I'll be down great week. Yeah, we're throwing that out there. Yeah. Do you think you can golf right now? I Can't know. Oh, no, we can't eat ice cream. Fire fest Yeah, it's bad. Oh, no Hank. Sacrifice. You do sacrifice for us

Constantly the team needed me and I didn't want to back out. Yeah No, Hank. Sacrifice. You do sacrifice for us constantly. The team needed me and I didn't want to back out. Yeah. What? I agree with you. You did. You were awesome on home run derbies. You didn't want to back out.

No, I didn't. I wanted to, but I knew I couldn't. Hank was very good. Stand up guy. Yeah. No, he was fucking awesome. He had a great swing. Okay.

Anything else? Brandon Iuk demanded a trade. Again? No, he formally, he like requested it with the team. Instead of passive aggressive. Instead of passive, instead of just posting practice videos where he's like, yeah, I wish I could play with this guy. Yeah, but he apparently requested it with the team, but the Niners have a history of

not honoring trade requests because you don't really have to. Yeah, no he apparently requested it with the team. But the Niners have a history of not honoring trade requests because you don't really have to. Yeah, no, you don't have to do anything. You don't have to do anything. And Brandon Nyuk's really good. In the NFL, that's what the contracts basically say. It's like your only leverage that you have is to just be annoying.

So he wants to trade. Wait, is something going on with Devonte Adams, too, memes? A lot of people shot it down but there's speculation so but you're thinking maybe I'm thinking if the Raiders start off bad then Trader Room is gonna ramp all the way up nice nice yeah nice yeah on the on the new Netflix show the receiver he was just pissed at Jimmy G. And not getting the ball. I saw that. He's like, he's going to get me killed.

Yeah. Never want to see that. We should watch that show. I think it's good. Yeah. Never want to get me killed is not what you want your wide receiver saying. They got to make a show just the fullback.

Like how we had the quarterback one, then wide receivers one. Give me a fullback show. Just a 10 minute episode? All fullbacks, yeah. 10 minute episode, but just just dudes lighten people up. Sideline shot, sideline shot, sideline shot. Yeah.

Full line package, sideline shot. Then the bye week, and they're on their family farm using a tractor. Yeah, that's what I want. Show me fullbacks. Show us fullbacks. All right, should we do our Mount Rushmore? Something that is probably the most ambitious thing we've

ever done is this podcast. We're going to try to do a Mount Rushmore for the third time for real this time though Hank water oh we did do water yeah water was a good one it was a good one yeah water was a good one you remember when what what what went one one overall it was from the hose maybe the the ocean? The ocean probably. My dad did that one. He was bad. Yeah. Bad performance. Okay. The second time we did it. It is the Mount Rushmore of pizza toppings and it's brought to you by our friends at Pepsi. Saucy, stretchy, gooey, crunchy, messy. Pepsi is an essential part of the most undeniably delicious food moments. Let's face it. Pepsi just

makes every bite better. The refreshing pop of sweet fizzy Pepsi bubbles makes even the best food taste even better. Grab a Pepsi zero sugar for your next meal as every crave worthy bite is better with Pepsi. We love Pepsi. I was actually drinking a cherry Pepsi earlier today. So good. They gave us the old plastic cups, the hard plastic cups. Oh, delicious. So every meal is better with a Pepsi, especially pizza. And we are going to do the Mount Rushmore pizza toppings for real this time. Hank, do you, are you going to participate I? Think I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna leave it up up to my guy hole no no no no no no I have a question I have a question for him

If you got if you got lied to and burned there we go I Would like to after this question. I would also like to ask no What do you mean no? I can't ask a question? He can answer, not before he answers my question. All right, answer his question, then I'm going to ask you a question. But I object to Hank's question. Objection.

Yes, already objected. Because he did not get burned. If anything, we were- Well, that's what I was going to ask. We were gassing him up. We were gassing him up. Yeah, yeah, save it, save it, save it, because I'm going to ask him a different question after. All right, you know, you do something with honor and integrity, you believe everyone's

playing by the same rules, and then you find out that people bent the rules. They went behind your back. They lied to your face. He's a Michigan fan. Would you, would you give them the time of the day and, and do another version of that or would you stand for something? You should give them another chance. Oh, I love that answer. I did last summer. I love it. No, you didn't. No, you didn't.

No, you didn't. Let me know. No, he took spinach one more and tried to throw it. Let me ask you a different question, Matthew. Would you say, if you have a friend and they are going through some tough times down in the dumps, they're losing Mount Rushmore, they're just not some tough times down in the dumps. They're losing Mount Rushmore. They're just not happy. Like life, but that's the thing I'm losing Mount

Rushmore is right now. So how am I supposed to believe you? Hold on. I don't believe I can already have already. Throw this Lee. His life. I actually I've lost the last five Mount Rushmore. That's not true. I lost. I lost Monday's. His life is not great. And then your friends come and pick you up and try to make you feel good for a moment. Would you say that to good friends? Do it as a bit to make you feel worse. They make you feel worse.

Worse than- For people who don't know- That was the worst thing that happened to me that whole summer. Four years ago, Hank was getting crushed and life wasn't good for him at the time, and we might have thrown him Mount Rushmore pizza toppings when he found out he was so mad. So, so mad. And then last year we tried to do it again for real and he took spinach one one. So we're going to try to do it for real this time. Let's have, let's put it together. Let's do it. I'm going to go for real. Me too. Hey, hey, exactly. Like a little kid at camp. This is the worst thing that's going to happen

in my whole summer. Can I come home? I once. He's like, this is the worst thing that's going to happen in my whole summer. Can I come home? Yeah. I understand your PTSD. I said that was the worst thing that happened to me that summer. It was a joke. Yeah, I got it. Yeah.

I did too. Well, you just said whatever. All right. I know you have PTSD from this. Hank doesn't think you actually got it. I kind of agree. You said this is going to be the worst thing that happened to me this summer. I kind of agree.

I did not. All right. Okay, whatever. Let's do it Hey, who's up? Who's up first? Hank is Hank Pepperoni Come on. Hey good pick wait so good pick. Don't be a bum. Don't be a bum. Come on I don't believe I can I literally will not do this in good faith

You just set it up your friends been losing my Rushmore's have I been losing Mount Rushmore's Yes, so how like I can't I'm gonna go through with good faith I'm not gonna I can't but our picks are gonna show that we're trying but Hank you You're not losing Mount Rushmore season by that much No, you're not smoke. I'm only four points ahead of you and I lost on Monday's show. It's early. There's always a comeback All right, who's up second? You lost on Monday's show. It's early. There's always a comeback.

All right, who's up second? I think it goes to Max. I'm second? Yes. Oh, fuck yeah. Sausage. Easy. Good pick.

Good pick. All right. I'm going to go double olives. No, it's PFT, right? Yeah. It was a joke. Wait, didn't I go last time? No.

No, you went first last time. It's a circle. I'm sorry, Hank. Wow. I'm sorry. I Wow. I'm sorry. I apologize I Apologize. All right. I'm going to go With Bacon then I'm gonna go wait what we're all fucked up. Yeah bacon bacon bacon

Okay Bacon. Bacon. Bacon. Okay. Hank, Hank definitely thinks something's up. Hank has collapsed. So what's been taken? Pepperoni, sausage, and bacon. I want to take double halves. I'm not going to. I'm joking, Hank. That was a joke, Hank.

That was a joke. Hank's having a great time. That was a joke. Hank, can you at least pretend to be excited about Mount Rushmore season? Hank. That was a joke. Hank's having a great time. That was a joke. Hey, can you at least pretend to be excited about Mount Rushmore season? Mm-hmm. I got a question. Does sausage include all sausage or is it just like classic sausage?

I think sausage is sausage. Sausage is sausage. Is chorizo sausage? I think chorizo can be a different... Chorizo can be different. OK, so I'll go barbecue chicken and then chorizo are my two picks. OK. My second pick is going to be extra cheese.

I don't like extra cheese. Oh, I love extra cheese. I'll take buffalo chicken. OK, nice pick. Hank, this is a good draft, Hank. How do you think we're throwing this? There's no throwing. We're being, we're doing this. I will do peppers and onion.

We got to take one. We'll give you both? No, we'll give them both. No, he has to take one of the two. Okay, fine. Can't feel like we're not pandering. Okay. One or the other. One or the No, he has to take one of the two. Okay, fine. We can't feel like we're not pandering. Okay. One or the other. Peppers or onion.

You have to take one or the other. All right, are the peppers and onion? Oh, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Two picks, that's good. Okay, two picks. That's a good pick. Okay. Max?

There's, it feels like there's a gun at everyone's head right now. We're in a Mexican standoff, but we're actually doing this for real. Yeah, no. Hank, are you all right? No, it's not. I don't think he's all right. All right, Max. We all know that Mel Rushmore died four years ago. People just keep pushing this back. People love that rush hour season. Um, okay. I, some people hate it, but I absolutely love it. I'm gonna go mushrooms. Ooh, I like them. Yeah, not bad. I'm gonna go

meatball. Mmm. Okay. That was my other pick. Yeah, meatball baby. Pick it. We're not allowed to like think about two picks? I mean, I would have picked all these I'm saying I was thinking between meatball and mushroom got it. Yeah, you love meatball I always think people that was the other reason is on your sub to yeah, yeah

And it was also my meat I should have done me. It was on them all out rush more salads meatball Yeah, great salad meatball salad is an excellent sound is that a real thing yo Yeah, it's an Italian thing meatball salad. That's the fattest thing you've ever said I It's a thing. I can't like I can't tell you what what things are Okay, I put forth emotion to have Hank smile He won't just smile Hank. He won't you'll feel better He won't just smile Hank. He won't you feel better

Is a white pie as topping or no, I don't even know what would be the topic is a different side of you We'll give you a regard Yeah, that was weird I said that was very horny say it again No, not saying okay I do love a white pie love a white pie Fuck it. I love it. I don't care pineapple. I love pineapple on pizza. Yeah, I fucking love pineapple on pizza I love pineapple with barbecue chicken on a pizza. Yeah, I like pineapple and pizza, too Yeah, there will be haters pineapple and bacon Babel bacon's great as well because that's my favorite pizza.

Yeah. I don't know why. What happened? At what point did it become a thing where people were like, pineapple doesn't belong on pizza? I personally don't like pineapple on pizza, but I don't mind people that do. Yeah. But it's just like, it's one of those things like- I'm not going to fight someone on it. It's kind of like mayo, when mayo just got a bad rap for no reason. You order, if you're doing a big order, get one of them that's got the pineapple on it. It's kind of like mayo when mayo just got a bad rap for no reason. You order, you gotta, if you're doing like a big order, get one of them that's got the pineapple on there. Yeah, of course. And then I'll go, I'll go with a prosciutto. Okay. Last pick. I'm going to go in a nod to the margarita pizza. Basil. Yep. Good pick. Fresh basil. Get a little

fresh base on there. Fresh basil, mozzarella mozzarella tomato. That's really all you need Yep, it's good pick I'm gonna go with a super shot. I Think I like it better than a pepperoni, and it's kind of similar. Oh, yeah, so per shot I don't think you've ever had super so it's good. It's really good. Oh, I forgot one. I have another one that one I'm so mad at myself. I'm so mad at myself Can I ask hole for a recommendation Yeah, his name is Matthew. I don't know if hole hole sounds so weird, but I understand we do nicknames

Should I go should I go meat or cheese meat? Taco meat you asked him if you go meat or cheese. Meat. Taco meat. You asked him if you'd go meat or cheese? Yeah. Come on. He's gonna say meat. Taco meat. It's not bad. Yeah.

I've had a taco pizza before. That's a good pick. That's a good pick. I totally forgot. Oh, burrata's a good one. Burrata's a good one. Burrata would have been much better than taco meat. Thanks, fucking yeah.

Thanks, Matthew. Oh, Matthew. He's a shit. You ruined it. Would you guys have accepted hot honey? Yeah Yeah, it's because when you said so per cent I was yes hot honey Yeah, so damn it. This is that that's the exact thing that was going through my head I was like that could be like a drizzle. I don't know if that's necessarily no, I'll just go with so per se I'm mad at my body was whatbersaut. I'm mad at myself.

But hot honey was what I was thinking as well. I'm mad at myself. All right. What cut left off? I like, and this is more, you do it with the prosciutto, but an egg on the pizza is pretty good. You guys ever get that? Never had that. In the middle? Never had that. Oh, it's great. No, you don't like it, Matthew? No? I'll get you guys one. I order from a place that it's it's pursuit and there's an egg in the middle and it's fucking delicious

I like the I actually like the pizzas with like the like the pursuit and the arugula. Yeah as well So arugula is another one. I like jalapeno Yeah on their jalapeno on a pizza is pretty good, too Yeah, I hadn't had it till I've been out here, but sausage like jardinaires really good. Yeah But it's good it's really good if I get like a tavern style pizza with get one Jardinere probably Probably the fattest thing you can do, but I fucking love it It's the the pizza place in Madison Eons, which actually they have one Demos is the name of it It's in Chicago as well macaroni. Yep. We die

They have that and what's the name of the pizza buffet place? Pizza? Little Caesar's? Cece's. Cece's Pizza Buffet. There you go Matthew. Nice job, Hole. Tomatoes on the pie, sometimes pretty good.

Yes. It can be overkill. Yeah. Yeah, tomatoes, like a margarita. What's salami? Yeah, margarita pizzas. Yeah, margarita pizza's good. Salami?

Trustree? I used to work at a place that had, it wasn't great pizza, but it was an Italian place with like the oven style, thin, and they had a really good like salami and like hot honey pizza. Yeah. Mmm. Are we the trustry? But I haven't ordered it, like it's not something I would order.

I want pizza real bad right now. Tell you guys something, being totally honest. I don't mind anchovies. I don't like them. I don't mind it at all I I almost never get a pizza with anchovies on it But when there's like a little bit anchovies as a treat they just taste like salty You just need you don't taste fishy at all It's just so hard to do that because you just can't you need like buy in from like three people Yeah

If I'm like by myself once every couple years just as a treat get half of it with anchovies on Yeah, I had a chicken caesar slice and my college pizza place. That was good It was yeah, it was just like chicken caesar salad on a pizza but it was nice one of the biggest pet peeves I have is when you order pizza for a large group and someone's like get a get a cheese or or whatever cheese or like maybe get like a Mushroom or something and they only have one slice that and they eat all the other ones I'll make people if they ask for something like if they ask for an anchovies, I'd be like You have to eat four slices better put in work

Like you have to you can't you can't have one anchovy and then go to the pepperoni that we're all eating There's ever eat a full pie by yourself colony grill. Yeah. I don't know if that's full pie, like it is the full pizza, but it's thinner. But yeah. Yeah, I've had it. What is your favorite, like if you're going and you can get any toppings you want, like what is your customizable pizza order? Like right now.

Bacon pineapple. I am doing pepperoni, Jardinaire, and then I've got hot honey at home that I put on it. I go one pepperoni pie, one barbecue chicken with sauteed onions pie, one cheese pie. It's all for me. That's it. I go pepperoni and then a barbecue chicken with sauteed onions. I do sausage, sausage onions and mushrooms. That's my favorite I'm a solid order. I love mushrooms on pizza, but I know people aren't gonna and there's some people that just hate mushrooms No, I think mushrooms. Yeah long on pizza. Yeah, it's all about the saute too. Like it's not they're not yeah

Yeah, you know dry mushrooms. Yeah when I was in college I was a pizza delivery guy for I think a full year full calendar year I worked at a place called Anthony's Italian touch, which is a very creepy name for a pizza That is weird and what made it weirder was the guy that ran the place was not Anthony His name was Nick, but he just called it Anthony's Italian touch because it's uh more Italian But I had this one customer that would order extra mushrooms like double mushrooms That was all that he would get and that shit would stink double mushrooms double mushrooms like order extra mushrooms, like double mushrooms. That was all that he would get. And that shit would stink up my car. Double mushrooms.

Double mushrooms, like extra, extra mushrooms. Double mushrooms. My car would smell so bad. What do you guys think about a little pesto? Pesto on the pizza, that's nice. Yes, that's good. A little change of pace. Not bad.

That's another one where I won't order it if I'm not eating, you have to eat a lot of slices of those. You can't be like, I want the pesto pizza. Memes keep saying vodka pizza, but I don't think that's a topping. I feel like that's just a sauce. It's a sauce. Yeah, I thought about doing stuffed crust,

but I don't think that's a topping, right? It's a style of pizza. No. Yeah, that's a style. Matthew, we missed anything? No, I think you covered it. OK. I mean, unless you want to start talking barbecue sauce

and ranch and. Well, we have barbecue chicken. Yeah, but like yeah, yeah, I do like a little but yeah, like if you can't get a little barbecue sauce little Frank's red hot and Frank's red hot. It's pretty good. Thanks. Red hot goes on everything if it's like shitty pizza I like like a ranch or like a hot sauce But if it's good pizza, I just like one like the pizza by itself. By the way Hank still thinks we're fucking with him. He's just not participating. I think what happened is this took Hank back to a dark place. Yeah no there's PTSD. It's like trauma involved and he heard us talking.

Yeah the death of this segment. We've had so many good moments. We had Max saying that he's titty fucking. Mmhmm. There's been some incredible moments. Mr. Positions? Yeah. Yeah, Billy and Jake doing AI Taco Bell orders. There's been some great Mount Rushmore moments.

I don't know. The integrity of the game was lost. Look at that check. We haven't broken the integrity since. We broke it one time. And you still have trust issues. Why wouldn't I? Of course I do.

Because we've done three seasons straight up since then I've watched that video so many times by the way of Us doing the original Mount Rushmore pizza draft and then Hank being totally surprised whenever he got like his next pick Yeah, he was so mad at us. Yeah, so so mad We're back. This was a good draft. Come on Hank Yeah good times. It's a good draft. Hank, you won an NBA championship like three weeks ago. Your favorite athlete of all time sucked your dick at his retirement ceremony. That's got to, you can't get down in the dumps because of a segment. I'm not down in the dumps. He's just, he's got his guard up. Yeah.

He's got his guard up. As I should. But you are down in the dumps. He's just he's got he's got his guard up Yeah He's got his guard as I should but you are down in the dark But we did we we just pulled this off now. We can put it to bed now. We can lay it to rest pizza toppings are done What I feel like that's what you're setting me up. You're trying to set me up I know I know you are this whole time you've been like trying to get me to get my guard down and then you come back Over the top. Yeah, i'm surprised cuz I'm getting smoked in the standing so yeah What are the standings? It's not that bad. Yeah, there's remember last year you guys didn't you guys make a comeback? Yeah, the end yeah, hey Billy and Jake did oh it's Billy and should be real shame If people voted for this Mount Rushmore based on attitude during the Mount Rushmore

No, we we had a good lead and then I went on vacation. Oh Oh yeah, that's right. So you just suck at Mount Rushmore, Hank. That's all it is. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like you always have like two good picks. I tried to blame the team. I had the team angle for a while. Yeah.

That's kind of not working. There's nobody left to blame now. Yeah, it's all right, it's the long season. It is the long season, yeah, we got a lot of Mount Rushmore left. Okay, let's get to our interviews. We got two great interviews. We have Mike Vrabel.

Wait, did we lose last year, Max? Yeah, you lost. You had to go over. Yeah, we did the 24 hour stream. Oh, damn. Yeah, yeah, it was bad. We have Mike Vrabel, and then we have an awesome interview with comedian Gary Veeder who has a crazy crazy story about his life with his dad growing up who's a scam artist,

Insane Stories and it's brought to you by our friends at Core's Light. The perfect summer playlist may be elusive but one thing is for sure it gets better when it's enjoyed with the cold Core's Light because music plus Coors Light equals chill amplified. Coors Light is the only choice when you're ready to choose chill. When you embrace the chill mindset, it's a good time to choose chill and crack open a Coors Light. Amplify your chill this summer with Coors Light.

Choose chill, choose Coors Light. Go to coreslight.com slash summer music to see how Coors Light can amplify your summer. Be sure to keep an eye out on Coors Light social handles all summer long for more exciting announcements. Celebrate responsibly Coors Brewing Company Golden Colorado. We love Coors Light. It is the greatest beer ever created. Coors Light. Go check it out now. It's summertime. It's Coors Light time. Mountains on the Cans and the bottles turn blue. It is the coldest beer out there. It is Coors Light. That's why we're on Chill Week with Coors Light. So we love Coors Light and you should love Coors Light too. We're also

brought to you by our friends at Game Time. Game Time, go right now. You can get tickets at Game Time, the exclusive ticketing partner of Barstool Sports. If you want to go to the Cubs game today, they play at 1.20 Central Time, $ $46 to get in Cubs versus Diamondbacks. That's right with Game Time, the official ticketing partner of Barstool Sports. You shouldn't have to worry when you buy tickets to your next big event. Game Time is a fascinating easy way to buy tickets to all the sports, music, comedy, and theater events near you. They have flash deals for sudden discounts, zone deals for when you're feeling flexible, and their lowest price guarantee means that if you can find the same seats for less anywhere else,

Game Time will credit you 110% of the difference. Game Time is the best place for last-minute seats with up to 60% off your favorite events. What are you waiting for? I'm going to buy those Cubs tickets. Maybe give them to Puck right now with Game Time. Take the guesswork out of buying tickets with Game Time. Download the Game Time app.

Create an account and use code PMT for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. Download the Game Time app today. Last minute tickets, lowest price guaranteed. Okay, here he is, Mike Vrabel. Okay, we now welcome on a very, very, very, very special guest. More and more very. Very, very. One of our dear friends. it is a chill week interview presented by Coors Light and Chevy Silverado. One of our dear friends recently retired,

NFL head coach Mike Vrabel. You can't fire me, I quit. I was gonna say the recently retired, but then I realized you have a job. You're- I have a great job. I asked Kevin Stefanski, the coach of the Cleveland Browns, what is Vraibs doing for you and he said he's a scout team middle linebacker.

So that's what you're doing for the Browns. Partly. Yeah. Anything they need help with and anything I can do to learn. It's been awesome. You were actually putting on the pads right? You were doing like kickoff return. Yeah, just just helping you know, I mean, Bubba Ventrone is a special teams coordinator. Bubba was a rookie when I was with the Patriots. And so we would take Bubba and his girlfriend, his wife at the time now, now his girlfriend Katie, you know, we take these rookies at dinner or whatever. And so Bubba now is a special teams coordinator. So it was an easy transition to

help on special teams. I've played a lot of those positions, I've coached them and help Kevin and Andrew and the Browns and has them family however I can. Wait, you just said whatever I could do to learn? Yeah. I mean, that's a that's actually a pretty crazy. It's cool. And also crazy thing to say you were you're a very good NFL head coach that is in a transition period where you're going to an NFL head coach again and you're like I'm back to

learning well I think like anything else you guys look at podcast there's a million podcasts well there's a lot of ways to coach football there's 31 other teams head coaches there's coordinators there's guys that have been other places Andrew Barry his personnel staff, how they go through draft prep, how they integrate analytics and how they communicate with the coaches and all that stuff that I'm trying to learn

and be a part of. And it kind of worked out for them and for me especially. And so that's what I've tried to do. That's super mature way to look at it. When you relate it to podcasting, it's like we should send Hank off to another podcast to learn. We should learn. We should send him to politicking. When we were in Ohio State, Urban Meyer was like, whatever Alabama is doing, if they have 50 people in recruiting, we need 51. Right. And if they have this,

then we need to have one more. Like that's how he looked at it. And so you're always trying to figure out what everybody else is doing that's successful and, and try to figure something out. So yeah, you're a consultant for the Browns, right? Is that your official title? Yes, that's an awesome title coaching and personnel consultant. It seems like you do like whatever is needed or are you are you coming up with like your own initiatives, you have to be like a self starter.

I think there's a lot of leeway there. I think the first, the first thing I want to do is help Kevin wherever I can. I've got a lot of respect for him I think he's done an unbelievable job Is help and support him wherever if he has questions or he wants to bounce something off of me and then I Thought it was a great idea. He's like we have a pretty new offensive staff You know a lot of guys that have you you know, transitioned on to other places. And now we've hired some really good coaches that are that are new to Cleveland. Why don't you hang out on the offensive side and give a defensive perspective. Tommy Reese, former

quarterback of Notre Dame, Alabama coordinator, and he's coaching tight end. So he's like, why don't you work with Tommy? Yeah, and the tight ends. And so I played a little tight end in my day. You know, it's not a bad... Yeah. Yeah. Ooh, maybe Miles Garrett at tight end this year. Oh, shh. Yeah. I mean, you can't stop that. It's July. You can't stop it. Dude. So anyways, that's been really cool to have that perspective on offense, which, you know, having, you know, six years as a head coach in Tennessee,

there's plenty of offense that I was doing and understood and communicated with. So that's what I've been doing. So do you think Stephanski is going to have you address the team in the Mike Vrabel situational spot this year during the season? Potentially. I mean, we've discussed it. I put, you know, I put tapes together for for Kevin and things that They've done things that we've done things that people around the league have done Showed it to him. He's got a great group there. And so we sat, you know a few mornings and went through the tape and

what what you try to do situationally is you try to take all these clips and you try to You know consolidate it down so that you can show the team, you can show the quarterback so that everybody sees it through the same set of eyes. They're not going to be able to watch 3,000 clips in the last 45 seconds of the first half and the last 45 seconds of the game. So you're like, okay, that's a good one. And then you come up with this cut up and then you just show it to the coach and then he decides how we want to do things.

Do you know what I'm talking about though in terms of the actual situational spot? I knew I knew where you own this yeah there's a lot. You just tell me what situation? Yeah it's the the Tennessee Titans are playing a Sunday night or Monday night game and they're like seven to ten point underdogs and everyone thinks they're gonna get absolutely killed and then Mike Vrabel comes in and he wins the game. We did that quite a few times. Yes, that seems like every game we won pretty much seemed like that Anytime the anytime the Titans were like consensus written off as they got no chance in this game You guys would win out decent money lime

So like that's the that's I don't know I don't know how you did it it really was more than just a couple times where it became something that I almost expected where it's like, if their backs are against the wall and people think that they got no chance, Vraib's gonna figure out a way to get this team to play and play their best football.

Here's what I say, you guys have a team, you guys have an operation, you're very good at what you do. Early on, maybe a few years ago, you're like, we're going to make this switch, and it's going to work and our and our shit's going to take off. And we're going to, we're going to nail this, we're going to figure it out, whatever that was, whether that was with Dave or you guys. And so early on, I forget what it was 2018, we said, it was like, I think it was the second game we're playing Houston. And

they were rolling. They were good. DeShawn was down there. We, we had nobody we had everybody got hurt in Miami. We had like our practice squad tackles Marcus got hurt. And it was like, how are we gonna win? Well, we faked a punt through a punt to Bayard for a touchdown. I was like, we're gonna stand in the huddle for 38 seconds. We're gonna run to the line, snap it. We're gonna go wildcat with Derek. I mean, we did all, and it's, I was like, the night before the game, it was like 40, 17 and two.

I was like, we gotta run the ball 40 times. We need to hold them to 17 points or less, and we need to get two turnovers. And we won 20 to 17. Yeah. And it was like, that was the best. So when you explain these things, then you're like, this is how we're going to win. It may not be the same every week. It may not always work. But this was the plan. And I think if you

can do those things, and then the people around you see it work, they're like, Okay, well, we'll give it another try. I will see how it goes. So you had a specific like plan like that when you would go into a game where maybe your team didn't match up 100% like talent for talent you know if you play this game 100 times you're not going to win 50% of them but you had that plan of hey if we can muck it up and do these three things. Reserve the right to punt we played to 49ers and you know we came out uh I said reserve the right to punt it was back and forth we took of the ball, had a huge turnover in the red zone. And then Jimmy came out, I think it was the first play

of the second half and we had gone from playing all zone. We switched it up, we played man. He kind of chunked the ball. Imani Hooker intercepted it and we ended up beating him and they were, you know, they were really good. Thursday night game? Yeah. Yeah, right around Christmas. Yeah. I remember that. That was one of the ones.

Yeah. Where's like in the Ram Sunday night game. Remember that one was there? So was there a dolphins one too? The dolphins one was last year. Yeah. Yeah. There's so many where it's like, you just go in and everyone's like, Titan's got no chance. But you know, and whatever team hires Mike variable next, his head coach is getting like an entire season worth of Mike Vrabel being counted out Yeah, I think the 49ers were wearing all whites in that game Yeah, I actually gave you a chance after I saw those those didn't make any sense. Yeah Um, I mean, I don't know necessarily being counted out, but I just think that there's a there's a mentality that

You know me these guys were here for a reason Everybody I think each week, you just try to explain to everybody that you have to prepare as a starter. And I think it kept guys engaged. I think when they saw that, you know, we played different guys in different places and whatever we try to do,

you just try to keep them engaged. And, you know, hopefully I get an opportunity again and would love to try to do it. I think it's gonna work out for you for sure. I mean, this off season, I felt like you were one of the top coaching prospects after it's like, I was going through my own personal coaching search at the time and I was like, yeah, Mike Vrabel would love to have Mike Vrabel in DC.

It's a lot of it is about fit. You know, I think these interviews get overblown. I think that they, they go through a process. I think that, uh, are you too, you were too big and intimidating. Yeah, you are too physically big. It's a big man's game. You scared away a lot of owners because they're afraid of you. It's a big man's game, boys.

And I mean, they just keep getting bigger and bigger. And so, you know, I didn't really necessarily, I tried to do my job the best that I could for that organization. I was shocked. But these interviews are interesting, right? You try to make a connection early on, right? We have a connection. I've known you guys. Thought I had great interview in LA for the Chargers.

And Harbaugh decided to come back to the NFL. And that's what Mr. Spanos and John Spanos communicated with me. And I respect them for that. They literally called me on a speakerphone. They didn't string you along. No, they called me. And that rarely happens to where if an owner's

going to interview you and then go in a different direction, that they'll personally call you. And they were like, second place isn't going to give you much but wanted to tell you that you know, we just had an opportunity to hire, you know Yeah, hardball. So um That's how it goes. Yeah. I was I was actually surprised every time. Yeah, it is fucking impossible Every single time just say harps harps know them so well and I just always do that Yeah

I was I was actually shocked that you were fired this year because it felt like you were a good thing, a stable thing that the Titans had going. Your team's always played hard and I remember it was during the season. I will say that was, I was always proud of that. I appreciated that as a young coach. There was a veteran coach at Ohio State,

he came in, Dave Adolf, and he was a defensive coordinator with the Raiders, and he was a defensive coordinator for Al Davis, and that's not an easy thing. And he was helping out Ohio State when I just started there. And he came in and he, Trestle had brought him in to kind of just watch, consult, hang out, and good football coach, and he's since passed away,

but he said, man, your guys play hard. And I didn't realize how good that felt when he said your guys play hard and so I always try to carry that through You know and I figured it was the contract that you made for the team with the team Yeah, you're you you individually that's the contract that you make with the football team is that you're gonna play your ass off with that I really do think the way if you can get your team to play hard in the NFL, I think it actually is worth like consistently week in and week out. I do think it's worth a winner too at the end of the season. Yeah. And then if you're worth a broke one, then you got a chance to win. You know what

I mean? It's like if you play hard, you're going to be in the game. Right. There are teams that you can see like, oh, they're just not. They don't bring it to the other team at week in and week out. But when you when variable coaches a team that happens. Well, let's hope so. Yeah, we should hire them right now Yeah, you want it you want to coach our podcast? We don't have a consultant. I mean if I can't beat one of these guys Yeah, yeah, maybe you're trying to hit record on the on the camera yesterday the coffee. Yeah, did we get the coffee? Yeah, well Hank, you know, he's slow. Yeah. So so alright, so would you

ever coach college? I don't not gonna say never. But it's certainly turned into a different game. You know, I talked to, you know, Coach fickle. Yeah. You got to be a huge fan. Have you gonna go up there and have him on or no? We've had him on. Oh, good. But I saw him when I was up there in the spring, and I'm going to go up for a game this year. Are you contributing to the NIL? I've been telling them.

I like that. Put them on the spot. I'll tell you the answer. I've told them, find me a really good player, and I will do a Stella Blue coffee, NIL deal that's bigger than just giving them a little. Luke, I hope you're hearing this. I'm going to call Luke right now. I've told the basketball team. I told the football team, but figure

out like you bring the player to me and be like, Hey, we're this close to this guy. Can you help? And I'm in and I'm not going to bring in the closer. Yeah. I'm not going to just write like a 10 grand. You don't trust. I'm just not going to write 10 grand check and just be like, Oh, I see where it goes. 10 grand is not going to get you a player. Right? Exactly. Right. I want to actually get a player grand check and just be like, oh, I see where it goes. 10 grand's not gonna get you a player. Right, exactly, right. I wanna actually- You're not gonna get a player for 10 grand. I wanna actually have an impact where if you just give money to a collective,

it's like, where's this gonna go? It's gonna go to the players. But anyways, I don't know. Luke and I have had conversations about this, about how do you wanna structure that money that you have that you're allocated for each team, your salary cap? Is it going to be this group of incoming freshmen that I would consider rookies

that you're not really sure on and what's the hit rate? Are you going to try to develop your own team and then resign your own guys? Or are you going to live in the portal and that's free agency? And again, those are six month rentals, guys are coming in and then they're out. There's a lot about coaching college football that's not

about coaching football at all. And I feel like it would be, you could have more success, I think, translating from the NFL to college than you would go in the other way around. But also at the same time, if you're an NFL coach, I don't see, like why that would appeal to you, you have to work so much more. Well, there is a lot of, you know, you in the summer, you know, I mean, you'll be sitting at baseball games, or you'll be sitting at things and kids of, you know, in the summer, you know what I mean? You'll be sitting at baseball games

or you'll be sitting at things and kids will call and say, hey coach, I'm 30 minutes from campus. And you're like, I mean, there was a guy from Georgia. I was at one of the kids' baseball games when I was coaching Ohio State. And he was making the Notre Dame, the Michigan, Ohio State loop, like in the summer. And he went to high school like an hour from Georgia. And I'm thinking, there isn't a chance in hell this guy's coming to Ohio State loop, like in the summer. And he went to high school like an hour from Georgia

and I'm thinking, there isn't a chance in hell this guy's coming to Ohio State. But I've got to come in there, open up the stadium, go Bucs, and I'm thinking, just go on down there and commit to Georgia. Yeah, and yeah, it's chasing, you know. And he did. Yeah, right, of course, he did.

So do you think Coach Fickle's, I mean, I'm very bullish on this season, I think it's a tough schedule, but how do you think, I thinkle's I mean I'm very bullish on this season I think it's a tough schedule but how do you think I think going into his first year at Wisconsin and again there was maybe some a football coach and a football player bull bear like can we clean up that like you mean that you're excited about the bull is a good bear bull is strong well bears I mean have you seen the Bears out here and I'm bullish means I'm very excited and I'm like by the Luke Fickles It gets very complicated when he's talking about Chicago because he's always bullish on the bears bullish on the Bears. Yeah bearish on

Yeah, so I am high on Luke fickle good I think the first year going to Wisconsin probably were it was maybe a more of a Wisconsin probably were it was maybe a more of a you know he was he was my host at Ohio State yeah he was there as a freshman and I came in in December and he was waiting for me when I got there at the hotel and and there and the rest was his how good yeah well his ID worked for me when I was 19 years old would win in a fight right now fight I'll beat his ass I. I mean, yeah, this is not a sanctioned wrestling event He only lost once as a high school wrestler, right? I think he lost A freshman he was an unbelievable wrestler. I lost once his entire career

I think he lost three I because I went to a really really good high school wrestling program I was a basketball players too athletic to wrestle but I wrestling program. I was a basketball player. I was too athletic to wrestle. But I remember and we had ended up winning the national championship. So all my buddies were wrestlers and they played football. And so Luke, I think lost three as a freshman and then went undefeated three straight years. So he'd kick your ass. Yeah. No, no, no. Like in a sanctioned like wrestling match. Absolutely. Yeah. But if you guys fought right now, he would just, he would wrestle you to the ground. I did. I do not believe if it was a street fight that I

would lose to. I think he would. I think I have you. What's the size? He'd splatle your ass. You're way bigger than him right now, right? I'm intimidating. Yeah, you are bigger than he's lost a little weight. But all right, so back to the Luke Fickle question. I think the first year at Wisconsin, maybe a little bit more of a situation he had to clean up than he realized. How do you think he's feeling going into year two? I am always high on Luke.

I wanted, um, Luke recruited my oldest son Tyler when he played in Houston, and he recruited him at Cincinnati. Jen and I, you know, obviously we don't have a say. My wife and I thought it would be amazing, because what he was doing with that program. and then Tyler's like you know dad I've known uncle Luke since I was born you put him in a tough spot yeah and it was like yeah when you look at it like that you make the decision that's best for you now you got to call him and Tyler was like fuck he's like I gotta tell him I gotta call him and I said yeah that's part of the deal he goes I figured

you're gonna say that. Yeah, he should have just gone to Cincinnati instead of having to call him. Yeah. I was like, Luke, you're pissed at me because Tyler's not coming. I was like, don't be pissed at me. Right, right.

Hank, you got Vraib's coffee? Where'd he go? Hank's just off. Hank's off surfing the internet in the other room. So speaking of Hank, his favorite person in the world, Tom Brady. I don't know if you saw, but he went to Tom's Jersey retirement. Yeah. Tom called him out by name. Yep. Brady for, we also watched the roast of Tom Brady, which you were not at. I was thinking that you were going to be there. I mean, all the good stuff.

I mean, I was too much low hanging fruit on those jokes. I thought there's I've done much more. Yeah, I mean it does feel like you were uh, you maybe spent whatever it was the first Five years of his career roasting him every single day. Yeah. No, we had those were great. Those were fun uh, the roast was funny I I um the funny parts, I mean I didn't sit there for three hours, but uh, You know, there was some good stuff. Yeah. What if Hank was Tom Brady? Would you roast Tom Brady? What would you have said at the roast?

Oh, there's a lot of stuff left in there, I think, that we could have done. Again, I struggle with the age. I like to age gracefully. I got wrinkles, I got crow's feet, I got scars. It's just a polish and a shine on that face of his. Yeah, I think everybody in this room, we all age gracefully.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, we just embrace it, you know? He's kind of like an anime version of Tom Brady. It's like an airbrush. Yeah, right, right. It's an Instagram filter of himself. I was with a, we had a family over the summer come and hang out with us a couple days

and we went out on a boat and we got a 16 year old son and a 12 year old daughter. The daughter wanted to get pictures of her jumping off the boat and she's like, as she's in there she's like, put it in portrait mode and I'm like, what the, what is portrait mode? Yeah, I mean, the game is, the game has changed.

It's, everybody's got to go on Instagram or TikTok. The, speaking of which. Thanks, Hank. Are you surprised that No, never surprised. Bill didn't get a job? That was a little surprising to me. It felt like he would have.

Yeah, again, there's about a connection, right? You know, I mean, you come in, you sit down. Some organizations have eight to 10 people there. Some have just a few. And you have to sit down there and they have to, you know, I'm not I don't think many people know Bill. I mean, he's been in New England forever. So I don't know how those interactions went. But there's certainly a connection that has to be made. It's not just, you know, they have to see them say, this is the person that's going to lead our team to a championship, not that he did it in New England, and it's just automatically going to work.

Right. So there's a lot of fit to it. Having having done it, there's a lot of fit with the pieces that are around you with ownership to support the communication, the general manager, the personnel people, however that works. And so, you know, maybe that wasn't the right fit. Yeah, I think there's a chance also that he gets into media and he either loves doing media or he loves the time away from football and kind of leans into it and doesn't come back.

Well, I think there's just so much knowledge there and the way that he can articulate it and he explains it. And those are, when I watched him briefly, you know, in those media opportunities, that's what we felt like, you know, me and Teddy and Willie and Tom and on and on and Seymour and everybody that we played with and we're in Rodney and it was just, that's kind of what we got in a team meeting was this overall history of

football, understanding of who we're playing, how we have to win. Just the intricacies of that. And I think you saw some of that. Yeah, no, I mean, he was great on the draft night stuff. It's, yeah, I just, I was shocked. We'll see, you're right, the fit is always, you know, the connection, the human connection with the owner and the coach, but that just feels like maybe owners are intimidated too, where it's like a guy who has that

legend behind him and the amount of Super Bowl rings, he's going to command a lot of eyeballs and kind of take a lot of attention in your organization. And sometimes you need that though. Sometimes somebody's got to stand up there and take the bullets. Yeah. And sometimes that's a good thing. Did you? Yeah. Did you think the Apple TV documentary was? What did you what were you? I didn't watch it I did they came in they interviewed me I said you know I can be available you know for for an hours to in the summer right before training camp or something you know they came in and

and I didn't really again I was in a different position I was coaching right I was gonna play against coach against right I was gonna play against coach against bill. I was gonna play hell coach against bill So I didn't really like catch much of the undertone of the the hit piece, right? You know, I didn't watch it I talked to some some big big patriot fans and they're like if they spent ten minutes on a team that one twenty How are three games or four games in a row in the national football league, then it wasn't a very good document.

Oh yeah. Your team, Scott, they basically, uh, showed the first super bowl. And they won again. They were like, and they won again. And also they won two more. Okay. Now Aaron Hernandez. Yeah. I felt like the roast thing, man, that was probably what bothered me the most was like the whole idea of about a roast like if we went out or we were Hanging out like you'd make fun of me and make fun of you or you'd make and you'd make fun it Like you're there to like you you get made fun of and then you get to stand back up Yeah, and then make fun of somebody else

This poor bastard. He can't even defend himself. Yeah, he's in the he's in the great it's like, we can. Yeah, you can't really like there's no swinging back. Yeah. That's the point that was I was some of those jokes. I was like, but there was some funny moments in that row. Yeah. Yeah. So you obviously still have, you know, close ties with the Patriots always will. Was there any part of the the Ring of Honor ceremony that maybe rubbed the Titans the wrong way where it's like does he love that more than he loves us? Well you're asking the wrong person. I certainly hope not. You know I certainly hope not. You know when you when you there was gonna be

some uniqueness to this I don't know you know I can't think off the top of my head I'm sure there's coaches that did something, but not currently where I went back. It was the bye week and everything was structured. It was hopeful that our bye week in Tennessee was Patriots home game. And it was, and it did, and it worked out. And as soon as it came out, you know, you call the owner, you call the team president,

because you can kind of see like, this is how it's gonna be. It's gonna be a big deal. You know, I mean, it's like I played there, you're going back there, you're going to put a red jacket on, you're going to stand with Mr. Kraft for four hours, there's going to be that you're going to sit in the box next to him, and you're going to watch the game and you're going to have a conversation. And all these

things are going to be caught on television. Right. But like, my that didn't affect my desire to be in Tennessee. That's how it goes. Like you go back there and it was amazing. And the conversation that I had with the fans was, don't be frustrated about this season. Like look up there and look and see. Like when teams come in, like they stare at those banners.

Like I remember going back there in 2020 and the 19 season and telling the players like you're going to see those banners and those aren't, you know, I mean, you don't get caught looking at the pinstripes boys. Like those things are amazing and what they've done and yeah, they were 19 and three in the month of January in the playoffs. Like it's going to be a tall task, but we're up're up for it and I'm gonna tell you how we're gonna win But also a lot of teams go in there and I stare at those pairs and I wanted to explain that to the fans like It's not like you don't walk in NFL stadiums and see the entire end zone like with AFC

Central division champion banners like these are super right batters right there Lombardi trophies These aren't like Division banners that was a great game by the way where you stole time from from Belichick. You just time-traveled Did he ever yeah, did he ever say like hey touche like good job braids? No, it's different like I mean Bill and I I mean we have a I would I think a great relationship and But it's it's different right it was a player coach now it's coach coach and we're you know we were competing against each other and now we're you know up up hopefully potentially for for some of the same opportunities if the if it presents

itself and so we never really talked about that situation or you else. And it's kind of like understood. Like everybody, these games are all taped guys. Somebody comes up with an idea and then somebody tries to do the same thing or somebody did it like perfectly. That's like the perfect moment. Right. Yeah. It was good.

And again, my guy, I did not want to smirk. I swear to God. You definitely had a little smirk. But my guy, Stretch, up in the box, who's with the Rams now? He's going to help the Rams. John Stryker, Stretch. He's like my personal assistant, game management. He was doing a lot for us, and now he's with the Rams.

But he was in my ear ear and he could watch on the TV copy and he is like, he is steaming. Yeah. Like stop, stop telling me this because I could not, I didn't want to like smirk. Explain the situation, the loophole that you took advantage of. Outside of, yeah, the outside of five minutes, any defensive penalty, they would just wind. Right? The clock.

They would just take the yardage off and then put 25 seconds back and start the clock. So you could take it down, you could fall start or you could delay a game, then you could fall start, then you can delay a game again, eventually. Because if you're punting from the 36 yard line or 35 yard line, you don't want to attempt a long kick in the in the weather or whatever it may be. What's the difference for these punters nowadays between the 40 and the the the plus 40 and the minus 45? They're they're so good. They're so specialized. They'll just, you know, instead of

kicking an end over end, you know, they'll just kick it in the corner and kick it out of bounds So the yardage really didn't matter It was about taking the time off and figuring that try to give Tom Brady less opportunities or if we got to stop Then they would have less time we ended up stopping them and then they had eight seconds And there's nothing the other team could do they're sitting there I think it's over there yell at the officials and the officials are like, if you do it again, it's going to be this this and I said, you know, I'm like the guy jumped off sides like the guy

flinched. I don't know what to tell you. Jesus Christ. You're yelling at me like I know the rules. It's right there and you've done that. Just tell me what the rules are and we'll play by and we'll do the best that we can. So then the next year they said any penalty, the clock stops, any offensive penalty, the clock stops. That's kind of an honor to get a rule change because of something you did.

I had one as a player too. What was that? So it was the old like fake timeout because the rule is you can't call two consecutive timeouts. You pump fake to timeout? I pump fake to timeout. So we would do this on like the field goal block. And because this is back when you could push. Yeah. So Teddy and I would literally stand with our hands on Seymour's ass

and Ty Warren's ass. And we would as soon as the ball was that you could push. And it was like, it would just be a tidal wave and the line would go back and everybody tried to block. And you can't push anymore. Right. So we would like I used to kick her, we call the old timeout and then I would stand up and I'd be like timeout, timeout, timeout, knowing that the official wouldn't give it to me. And then the tight end who had his hand down, he would like think it was a timeout. So he'd pick his hand up. I go, that's a false start. And they would move them back five yards because the guy thought, oh, it's going timeout watch this guy's gonna pick his hand up I'd be like come on come on and he would like and I'm like false start so then they're like if you

do that then that's the delay yeah anymore yeah but we did that a couple times back in New England you'd also just take a guy sometimes I think was on punt maybe punt return you would just take a guy on the sidelines be like hey go run out on the field get 12 men for us real quick so that is a that that was a clock thing and it wasn't necessarily punt return I don't want to get too far into the weeds on that one because that's actually a pretty good one it's oh yeah yeah for sake of you know I mean you're down in the game I mean, you're down in the game. Let's say you're down in the game, right? So now you're trying to conserve time.

There's two things you want to consume time or conserve time. If you're down, you obviously want to conserve. And they get a long game on first down, right? So now it's second and one, do you want to waste time out? Right? Probability that they gain a yard, right? So you kind of just resetting the process. Cause again, it's not about the yards. It's about the time. So you kind of run a guy out there and you know, yeah.

Cause the worst could happen is they get like a gain of no yards on second down and then get it. Yeah. Have you ever read up on, I think it was Buddy Ryan's Polish goal line defense. You ever heard this one? No. Oh, yeah Coach in New England was Rob Ryan. Yeah, he'd tell buddy Ryan stories He didn't tell this one you put 14 guys on the field on defense are like 13 guys 12 or yeah, it's 12 or 13. What difference it make if you're gonna 12 12 is good 13

You gotta be better, but 12 it's harder. Sometimes the ref will miss 12, right? No. Well, I mean. Not the NFL refs. No, it's happened. Yeah, I think the bill is right. And if you get a penalty, it's half the distance. So you go a centimeter.

And then if there's like six seconds left, then some of those seconds burn off maybe. And so then now they only have one play. And you get an untimed down. Yeah, or like the hack of Shaq where there's six seconds and then the seconds burn off maybe. And so then now they only have one play. And you get it untimed down. Or like the hack of shack where there's six seconds and you think that's the last play, usually it's the half.

But a lot of these teams now with the analytics, they're going for it where there used to be a field goal, they would just take the field goal. Now, they untimed down, the ball's on the half yard line, most teams will go for it. Yeah, you've, I mean, are you, I feel like you would go for it a relative, like you'd play the game of, hey, this makes sense. You went for it, this actually was,

I mean, you know this, Will Compton's a fucking moron. He's got like rocks in his brains. We had the whole debate about Dan Campbell and he was like, you can't go for two, you gotta kick the extra point, you gotta kick the extra point, you gotta kick the field goal. I was like, your coach Mike Vrabel, who from the outside, people would be like, old school, doesn't like analytics.

He did this against the Dolphins on the Monday night game where they're down 14 and you go for two after scoring a touchdown. He did it, that is what, that is playing the percentages. He is showing you that you can adjust and Will just didn't understand that. after scoring a touchdown, he did it. That is what that is playing the percentages. He is showing you that you can adjust and Will just didn't understand that. Yeah, it makes sense when you look at it

that if overtime is a coin flip, right? You try to avoid the coin flip. And you're just trying to put the numbers, give yourself a best chance to win it in regulation. And you can debate whether you wanna do that from the eight yard line. I don't know what the number is. That was the David Campbell thing.

Yeah, those are the, those are I think the odds start to go down. But that's the whole idea and the mentality. Seeing a lot of these teams just being able to go for it more when you cross the 50 yard line Yep, and and a lot of those things inside the two or three yard line going forward on for down These things are all very important and how you combine those numbers right is critical just like When you talk about analytics and in players, right? Height, weight, speed, different scores

that they put together based on the testing, arm length, how you weight things, what positions may take in analytics to more seriously than other positions would, right? Like, maybe not need to use the analytics so much in this position, but historically, height, weight, speed has transferred, translated pretty well in these positions. Yeah, yeah.

Maybe this is what you should do for your next, when you get to the next coaching cycle that you're trying to get hired, you bring Will with you and you sit him down, you're like, watch, I'm going to teach him something basic. That's risky, though, because he might not pick. Are you just sure you might bring a monkey in there to watch and wipe his ass? I'd interview Will.

What you do is you just have Will and you debate Will and you show how much you bring Will that Taylor's right there. You know, they got like seven JP. Yeah, and they got a bus, which is a great idea that they had to do a podcast on a car. I love Will, but I wanted to fight him. I wanted to fight him on the analytics thing because I was like, you just don't understand the simple math behind it.

How did the beer Olympics go? Oh, it was fantastic. I'm still hungover. It was a lot. Puking rally? Well, they kicked me out. So if you puke, you're out. I was like, I can still play. Put me back in, coach. It was like, you need to pass. They took my helmet. You didn't pass protocol. Yeah, they kicked me out. So if you puke, you're out. I was like, I can still play. Put me back in coach. It was like,

you didn't pass protocol. I was like, I want to get back in there. They get to the tent and they were like, he's not coming out of this tent. I actually, I threw up after the very first event. Did they let you compete as an individual? I was very sneaky about it. So I just, PFT threw up right away. So I chugged three beers and then just calmly walked around the corner, puked and came back and started drinking again. Good to go. They didn't see that. The cameras weren't on me. Cause mine was at the end of the day and it was after

all day and I'm show up in one of those like party buses. Yeah. Yeah. And it was, I mean, it was fun with the boys. Like those guys are the best, all the guys that were there. The not fun part is being 39 years old and waking up with like crippling Hangover anxiety and being like what the fuck am I doing? I just want to go home. That part wasn't fun But everything else is great who won? Will and Taylor so they yeah, okay. Yeah, I know we could bleep that out. Yeah I'm teacher went on Rich Eisen said oh he did. Yeah, So they, they invited everybody to Nashville to, to win. Yeah. That was basically it. They were the last game of beer. Punk took I think an hour and a half. It was insane. He was playing David Bacchieri and they just, none of them could see, um,

Will and Taylor beat our asses in the pool. Cause I started a rumor that they were drinking fake beer and everyone in the whole house like kept on coming up to them. They're like, are you drinking non-alcoholic beer? And so, yeah, they kicked our asses. They almost drowned Hank. I noogied the shit out of Taylor though. You should come. I've been invited. I didn't think that was the best place for me.

Probably not. You should come as your security. Just beat the fuck out of him. It looked fine. It looked like carnage. It was a lot of fun. It's like there's something about just hanging out with the guys playing games all day, getting drunk.

It's just, it's fun. Yeah, that's awesome. They're throwing a ball around with the boys. Right. It's just fun. Like there's nothing like there. Yeah, there's moments. I think around four o'clock. I was like, I'd pay a fucking million dollars to be in my basement

right now, but still. Just get me out of here. You're like, try looking for the Irish exit. Like that. Yeah, stab my fingers. Like the the Irish exit, like the old Mountain Dew Slippery. Yeah, so me and Big Cat never had a chance to win. That's what we realized after we got there,

because you're competing against giant dudes that can all hammer beer. We flew all here. This process, the bus. Yeah. We were talking. I was talking to two guys who played on Michigan last year who just got drafted.

Not only are they freak athletes, they're 300 pounds and they're 22 years old. Like we had no chance. We made the cut though, which I think is pretty good. Yeah. What is that? Like top? It was like the top half is half. Yeah. So yeah, I did it. I did it. Three beard chug in 8.19 seconds. Tom could chug. I would say that. That's the one thing I remember about that. He was like, just one right down. He would break that out. Parentes, there was a bar outside of Bryant College

called Parentes and then we would go there for like an hour after meetings before bed check at the Patriots. And it would be like, okay boys, let's go. When did he stop chugging though? Oh, I don't know. He had to have stopped. There was a couple years.

Yeah. When he was new. Yeah, man, that's how it goes. It was crazy. That's the transition. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I don't drink with my coworkers anymore. Let's, I can't.

No, they don't want to either. Yeah, no, no one wants to. They won't tell you this, but they don't wanna hang out with you guys, dude. Well, if I pay, they do want me there to pay. They really don't wanna wait. Yeah, no, they one wants to. They won't tell you this, but they don't wanna hang out with you guys, dude. Well, if I pay, they do want me there to pay. Maybe, but they really don't wanna wait. Yeah, no, they don't want me there. I think we can drink with them

for the first four or five beers, and then we gotta go, and let them do whatever they do late night. I mean, I guess if that's the culture that you guys wanna create. You're saying we're not cool? Yeah, we're not cool. No, they don't wanna hang out with the bosses,

just like nobody wanted to hang out with the head coach. It's how it goes. Are you gonna be on the sideline for the Browns this year? No. No. You're gonna be up in the booth? I'm not. I knew going in, Kevin and I talked and not having a roll on game day.

Oh. But I think that that's good. You know, I mean, I wanna do everything that I can, you know, prior to the game, the pre-advance, the practices help out where I can, you know, prior to the game, the pre-advanced practices help out where I can. And I don't want to change their flow of the game day. That makes sense. There'll be games that I go to.

And again, these were conversations that Kevin and I had, like, how is this going to work? You know, first we talked about, is it just going to be for the home games, right? Would it just be for the home games? And then the schedule comes out and it's like, they've got three home games in a row and then they got three away games.

And I was like, I don't, that's not good to you. That's not fair to you guys. I don't think that anything I want. Like maybe I'm starting to work with a young player or helping a coach or doing something. And then I'm just not there for three weeks. Like that didn't feel, so just trying to find something that's consistent. And so we came up with this and I think it's gonna work really well. Have you thought about what your Sunday is going to be like now?

Yeah, welcome to our world. You're gonna be watching the games on TV like everyone else. It's harder than playing. Um, yeah, I mean, I think that that's exactly what I'll do. I'll watch that watch the Browns or I'll watch whoever you know we're playing next. Try to get ready. You're gonna get to watch Red Zone. What is that the Red Zone or that? Yeah, you're gonna experience Red Zone. We have all the TV so we put on all the games. We have all the TV. You're gonna have. You strike me as a one TV guy. You guys are like, hey, you want to know how everybody's doing and you just don't want to know that they're doing better than you're doing. I mean, it's our job. How you doing? Braves?

I'm doing so. So fair question. How many TVs? How many TVs? How many TVs? That's true. You don't have a job. You're right.

Deloitte. Wait, are you on contract? You guys understand. Like I used to wear like orange brown sweatpants to school to like we'd see how many dog biscuits you'd eat. You want to talk about chugging beers. You haven't lived until you puked on milk bone. You know there's like hair in those things when you eat them as a sixth grader.

You ever party at the Muni lot? What's that? You hang out at the Muni lot ever? At the what? At the Muni lot. Isn't that what it's called? The Muni lot? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Municipal lot?

That'd be funny if that was your favorite thing. The first time I ever smelt weed, I was like in seventh grade and my dad splurged for dog pound tickets. And it was like, guys are like, had a keg there and they're like pouring, and it's like passing Jays around. And then I was in seventh grade and I'm like,

what is this? He's like, well, it's a good time to talk through a lot of this stuff here as we're watching the ball game. Um, was at the last game at municipal stadium. Oh, wow. It was awesome. They were people were pulling. Yeah, you remember? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Taking all the rails and they come out or the chairs and they come out like 15 seats in a row. And it was like, ah, ah, ah, and

it was throw it over the thing and the place would go nuts. Yeah, Browns fans are special. to the thing and the place would go nuts. Yeah. Yeah. Browns fans are special. I do have a good place in my heart for him. I've tailgated a couple of times at Park a lot. I have never seen people that drunk before 10 AM before. It's Northeast Ohio is a great place for football. There's a lot of history, which is really cool. You know, they had a lot of Ohio State players. Yeah.

You know what I mean? So the history there, they've had a lot of Ohio State players. Obviously Paul Brown, coaching high school football and Massillon. So that's the kind of stuff that's really cool. You know, Bill Willis was like one of the first nose guards. He played at Ohio State and they said the story was

that he kind of was like a linebacker and then he walked down over the center and put his hand down and that's how he became a nose guard. And he was, you know, he's a Hall of Fame player, it's Hall of Fame, pro football, Hall of Fame, college, you know, Hall of Fame, and Ohio High School Hall of Fame. So there's a ton of history there obviously,

and it's cool to look up and see a lot of those names. Yeah, speaking of Ohio, does it bother you that Michigan has your number right now? Or do you not care? I'm I care a little bit. I don't care a lot. Yeah, you're not you're not. I'm not no I'm I care. I don't care that much. Okay. You don't care that like the NCAA football game just shat on Ohio State with her trailer, right? Didn't didn't catch that across radar. No Yeah, I thought that for sure would know radar. No, that's what I hot to a girl. She was on the timeline She was on the documentary about her.

And I love this. Like, they're hillbillies in Tennessee. And we're making sure she gets every dollar she's supposed to get. And she's over there signing hats. Yeah. I'm like, I love this. Good for her for cashing in, though.

You got to know, strike while the iron's hot. He's like, I'm representing her now. And she's going to get every dollar she's supposed to earn. Being ethical about this, you gotta have like a follow-up plan if you're Hawk To A Girl. Like how do you follow up that massive first hit? Yeah. I don't know.

There's, you know, I mean, you don't. Yeah. I mean, other than like a fantasy camp where like they come in and it's like, you teach like, here's the technique. She's a coach. Yeah. She could be a coach. I got kind of a serious question. We talked about Dan Campbell.

Kind of serious. Kind of serious. We talked about Dan Campbell earlier. And I feel like where you were early on in your head coach and career in the NFL is kind of like where Dan Campbell has been around the last couple of years. Where what I mean by that is that I feel like journalists and the media and fans a lot of times

didn't necessarily know how smart you were from the first couple of seasons. They saw you as, you know, former linebacker, meathead, he's aggressive and I don't know if you played into that aspect to like let people underestimate you but I feel like that same thing is happening with Dan Campbell where he gets all the clicks where he says I'm bringing a live line onto the

field you know doing all the meathead stuff but secret yeah that was our fault but secretly secretly he's like very very smart in a football sense and he's like very fit around a game he played for a long time he you know obviously was successful in New Orleans and Miami and everything that he did. And I think that that's his ability to translate that being a player, right? These tight ends are very unique positions, right? They're involved in a run game, they're involved in the past concepts, so they know coverages, they also know fronts. So he took a lot of that as a player and the way that he played the game and

then translated that to his coaching style and This when you go out there, you're not trying to prove anybody like oh i'm this or i'm smart. I'm i'm i'm very intellectual It's all about what you're what you can get your players to believe in Right, but I feel like sometimes he does it the other way where he he puts stuff out there to make sometimes he does it the other way where he he puts stuff out there to make people underestimate him and not realizing I don't know that maybe he does or maybe that's that's his personality. But they've certainly been successful and I love the way that they play. I love that. You know, I

always root for Dan. I think that he's, you know, like, would always have conversations with him and wish him the best until they play the Browns. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's it is I think it also just speaks to the way the game is talked about, it's obviously evolved analytics. A lot of it's covered in a different way. Analytics is always something that was a part of the game. Of course, there's always percentages are always this and

I think now that there's got to be a fine line, right? There's got to be some working balance between the two, you know, they're humans and you have a feel and not every time that the conditions are the same. And, you know, the decisions that we make, yeah, they have to be, you know, you just don't want results based. Yeah, now, yeah, right. Well, it didn't work. So or it worked. And so it was right., they have to be, you know, you just don't want results based analysis. Yeah. Right. Well, it didn't work so, or it worked. And so it was right. It's got to be thought out before. Like if we get this situation, here's what we're doing.

You know, always had analytics. It's just how the numbers that we're now measuring are different because we've learned what's better, what's not. And having a coach that has like real life, like especially playing experience absolutely helps when you've got the numbers and then you also have game feel at the same time. Yeah, the application of it. And the biggest thing is that the players understand what it is that you're doing. Hey guys, we got to call upon this practice in August

when we went through this situation and this is why we're doing this. And I think that those once you can get the players to understand it and buy into it and believe it, you know, then you got a chance. Did you have that moment where you could feel that the players were fully buying into everything you did? Because it feels like every time I hear a story about coaching, and this

goes back to Belichick, it's like, the minute the players realize the coach is putting them in the best spot, they buy in 100% and they're all in and they'll do everything for that coach. Yeah, I do. I mean, I think it was, you know, early on, I think we'd, I think that they, we might've beaten the Patriots in 2018,

even before we went up there. And they'd lost to them in the playoffs the year before and they went hurry up, right? They went on the ball and they weren't ready and they weren't lined up. And it just, it didn't look like it was a unit, right? It didn't, there was no flow to what they were doing. And so I just said, you guys are gonna be ready

and to beat this team, to beat this quarterback and to beat this coach, when the game's over, you have to be mentally and physically exhausted. And however you wanna put that first, physically and mentally exhausted or mentally and physically is because every snap If you're not ready to go a quarterback like Tom is just gonna pick you apart, right? They're just gonna spread you out. If you can't get lined up. He's gonna snap it and he's gonna throw to the guy that's open

that's how they operate and We we beat him in Tennessee and in in the guys that were there and then had gotten beaten We're like, okay, we felt like we were prepared. They went empty. We blitzed them, sacked them. I mean, we sacked them like eight times. You know what I mean? And they were like, okay, this felt better.

It felt like we were ready for what they were going to do. So that was something that I think early on helped us. I just thought of another variable game when you, I think you held Patrick Holmes to three points. We did. Yeah, that was a class. Was that the week after you guys lost the Cardinals opening week? I don't know if it was the very next week,

but we played well, yeah. That was a variable game where the Chiefs were like, oh, the Chiefs are the best, Patrick Holmes, you held them to three points. Yeah, and we had great, you know, I mean, again, to be able to, I think Travis had one catch or something like that. And so the guys executed the plan they knew, you know,

just but you know, unfortunately, we weren't able to, you know, to beat him when it mattered. That was to go to the Super Bowl. I need you back in the league. Yeah, we need the mic variable weeks. It's just there. Tom, you get a sense. Yeah, you get a sense of it. And it's like, okay, at least I've got one winner this week. Yeah, it's always good to go into a weekend knowing you're you're not going to get a sense. Yeah, you get a sense of it and it's like, okay at least I've got one winner this Week. Yeah, it's always good to go in a week and knowing you're you're not gonna get shut out Yeah, the Steelers or the Titans or underdogs and everyone's written them off. Great. Oh, have you thought about the new kickoffs yet?

Yeah, we've worked through that what's gonna happen with those. I think you'll probably see I Think as the season goes on probably more touchbacks, you know, I think that the season goes on, probably more touchbacks. You know, I think that we'll see, you know, what's the difference? I know that analytically somebody's gonna, as soon as this comes out, they're gonna tell me the difference between the 25 and the 30.

It's five yards. Just did it for you. Points. Okay. Points. Is it a half a point? Is it a third of a point? It's 0.13 points.

Is it? Yeah. Good. Yeah. Sure. Is it a third of a point? It's 0.13 points. Is it? Yeah. Good. Yeah. Sure. It's a third of a point. But I think that if it keeps the kickoff alive and it keeps guys, you know, the special teams in the game,

I think that there's going to be more returns. I think there will be more yardage gained. I think guys are going to, you know, be able to get it up, to be able to hit it in there and get some yardage out there and we'll see what the 30 yard line does on the touchbacks. And maybe have kickers that can tackle too.

That remains to be seen. That'll probably never happen. One of my best friends in the league playing. All every coach is still hits. Larry Izzo came with this idea when we were in Houston. And Larry and I played for eight years together in New England. And so he was like, Billy, I think we're going to have Brian Peters, Northwestern guy.

We're going to have Brian. Our special team's a really good player. And he's like, I'm going to have Brian kick off. He can kick off. And it's like, we're gonna get an extra guy covering him. I think we were in Minnesota, first one, he kicks down to like the five and maybe wasn't the first one, but the second one he kicked and you could just see

his quad go explode. And I'm like, Larry, this isn't gonna go well for you. There's one guy who was like, what the fuck are we doing, Larry? I think he's on the Texans, right? He's a safety and can also kick pretty well. He did a couple kickoffs last year. So, Reid is a safety for Kansas City.

And then Daray is a running back. Yeah, Badger. He was, I really like, he was versatile. He was in Houston the first time when we were down there. And he kicked last year. I think he had a kick against Tampa Bay, the game that, you know, Houston came back and won at the end.

Yeah. Yeah. Do you still hate kickers? Cause I think you, for a time period, you did hate kickers, right? I mean, I don't know how many we've gone through, but there should be a game. Have you kicked for the Tennessee Titans from 2008 to 2022?

And I wouldn't be able to tell you if they did or not. I think one year we probably had six field goal kickers. And sometimes you just wouldn't send the kicker out there. It'd be like, you're just like, I'm done with kickers. I can't handle another miss. Yeah, I mean, I see these guys at kick force, Kyra Santos missed four field goals against the Bills. Bills were good, they're still good. I mean, Josh Allen, you know what I mean, I see these guys at kick force, Kyro Santos missed four field goals against the Bills. Bills were good, they're still good.

I mean, Josh Allen, you know what I mean, a great defense, four field goals. You know the last field goal he missed was that fourth one against the Bills. And then he goes to Chicago. I don't think the guys missed six. No, he's been actually money. You want so money.

I mean, it was unreal. And I'd watch every week, I'm like, oh, Greg Joseph. He could only kick 52 yarders when he was in Tennessee. Apparently he made a 65 yarder or whatever he did to win the game. I'm like, nice kick, Greg. These guys are great guys.

Apparently they get down here on Broadway. They can't. They can't make them. Nick Fulk was fantastic for us last year, and I joke, but we had certainly... It's a bad loss. Yeah. Some bad breaks.

Yeah, yeah. All right, so I got one last question. This has been awesome. We love having you on, Braves. Can't wait till you get back in, well, you're in the league, but head coaching, if you need us to call in a recommendation, we got you. I try. On a resume a resume. Yeah, yeah recommendations

I tried I tried to do that last year. There was a guy from the commanders Remember he was on he was like sitting first class on a plane. You were on that same plane. I was like You should go talk to Mike variable about this job. He told me you were on there. Did he talk to you? No That's sad ride, But I like Dan Quinn. Dan Quinn, great coach. Absolutely. But all right, so my row back question, rhoback.com, rowback.com, promo code take.

20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. I got great golf stuff. Rowback.com, promo code take. 20% off. That was all from the dome. I know. Make sure my swag bag's ready here.

Yeah, yeah. Well. How was the coffee? Well, how was the coffee? Hank wants to know. How was sure my swag bags ready here. Yeah. Well Well, how was the coffee Hank wants to know I was good coffee and cut you the comment the row back the golf stuff Hey, how are you golfing? We'll see what it's hard out there, but it's better than what it was last year. Okay, I got really good at skiing this year I mean, I'm a scratch skier. I Got fired and I went to the mountain and I skied. But it is it's I mean, when you go out there like it is nerve wracking. Like there's fans

like this. And every ball you got to put everything in and it's like, no like no gimmies. Yeah, no gimmies. Yeah. Yeah. So wait, what's your what's your handicap? Do you have one? I do. The index would be 8.3 if you looked it up right now It's like joe biden. That's pretty damn good. Yeah What's the work sometimes may be good sometimes maybe shit yeah incline walk some push-ups. That's it hike Wait, what is it incline walk? That's a hot girl walk. You know hot girl walks 12 and three five. Okay

You don't you don't hold on to the things right I go hands-free I'm just making sure some push-ups I did get into this boot camp so the boys back in Nashville at Richland Country Club there's a 7 a.m. boot camp there's like four of us and we got this trainer Justin and he does this like boot camp and I was like screw it out there these guys are guys I golf with and I'll you know Pico and the boys and Chappie and and Gotti and so we'll go in there and He grinds us and it just gives me a chance to cuss him out. Yeah for an hour It is something about like being pushed by someone else. It's right. And it's not even like heavyweight. It's just like do as many reps you need. Someone's just

yelling at you take two second break and then go. Yeah. So you go incline walk three and a half speed 12 in line for 30 minutes. Yeah, 3530 minutes. What? How many push ups? 100 or whatever. If I don't do that boot camp. That's a full workout? Yeah, do some toe touches and some core maybe. Some stretching, some core. So wait, when you're at the first tee. You do 100 pushups, how many breaks do you take?

I just go straight through. You just do 100 pushups? Yeah. Yeah, same. Me too. I don't go on my shoulder. I mean, the last two years, I would say this, the last two years I have felt like,

man, I felt like I played. Like I was okay, 45, 46, and then now it's like, Jesus, I hurt. Oh, what's going on? But now you're skiing. I wake up, identify as I'm set, yeah, but that's gravity, skiing is just down. Just go down.

Just using gravity. Yeah. That's how, you got a place in Utah, right? I do. Is that, isn't Apocalypse Bunker? I heard it might have been. Yeah, I heard it was Apocalypse Bunker. The entire state? No, no, your place in Utah, right? I do. Is that is an apocalypse bunker? I heard it might have. Yeah, I heard it was apocalypse bunker. The entire state. No, no, your place in Utah. Yeah. No, you

don't. It's not an apocalypse bunker. No, it goes right on the mountain. You just ski right on you just go right out the back. It's so so it's, it's, it's in the mountain. Your place is in the mountain. That sounds like a bunker to me. It's half in the mountain. You know, I mean, part so it's half the bottom part. It's half a bunker Yeah, it's a good place to go in case shit goes down. Will you let us in the bunker when shit goes down? Yeah, we'll go down there. We got a golf sim. We got a golf sim in the in the in the lower level nice and

Tomato cans then we do no just beer cans. Okay Any guns you got guns out there? No, not not cans. Okay. All right. That sounds like a good book. Any guns? You got guns out there? No, not not not a huge gun guy, you know But that doesn't mean we can't we can't get some yeah, right we get some yeah, it's I don't know I mean other than a bet, you know You go hiking right you guys are married and you know go hike and you know My wife Jen and I would hike. And she's like, well, I saw on Instagram

they got bears out there now in Park City. And I'm like, but I don't have to be faster than the bear. I just have to be faster than you. Yes, right, exactly. It's not that hard to understand. Yeah, we saw a coyote yesterday. Fuck a coyote up. Yeah.

Easy. Yeah, they're skinny. They're like 90 pounds punch in the face It's those are like a that's like a raccoon. It's like a carp with legs, right? Yeah, they're afraid of us So we're intimidating as fuck. Yeah All right Braves. Do you enjoy this? You're the best. Yeah, of course. Did you enjoy me? Yeah kidding me I know was it was it Rodney Harrison that said you're the nicest asshole that he knows Maybe I think I think that's yeah you're

you guys remember that story about Rodney and Kevin Falk right? No. So we bring Rod Bill like comes up with this idea that he's going to sign Rodney Harrison after the chargers let him go and he comes in it's like the first day of pads and Kevin Falk runs one of his like option routes out and I try to cover him or Teddy tries to cover him and we can't cover him and so he catches it and he turns up and Rodney comes and knocks the shit out of him. And everybody, you know, this is when we had like 8,000 fans.

And he wasn't a cheap shot and Falk gets up and kind of slams the ball around, he's like, fuck you. And then Dante's like Scarnacchia, right? Little scar. He's like, take care of your team, you can't, Ronnie goes, fuck you too. And me and Teddy looked at each other like, I think we got a dude, right?

He comes in on Dante, he comes in on the coach. We were like, me too. Yeah. We got it, we got it. We got a guy with some edge. That's it. Fuck, yeah, that's right. All right, yeah, you know, you're the best.

We love having you on. Maybe come watch some games with us on a Sunday. I think we could do that. Yeah. Let me see if I have to. See all the TVs, cause you're the one TV guy. Let me check with my boss. Okay, all right.

Kevin, I'm gonna reach out to you, and I'll see what he thinks. I have one last last question. Do you have any interest in doing TV, media or TV? Because I feel like you'd be good at it. At some point in time. I just don't want to cross over. I don't think that it's ready to go to the dark side yet.

No, no. You don't want to go to the dark side. Yeah. Well, I mean, by that, I mean, once you go to media, these guys, they never missed a tackle. They never dropped a pass. They never threw a pick. That's what I mean yeah that's true it's good point all right Braves thanks so much man thank you we'll get back to coach

variable in a second he's brought to you by Chevy as everyone knows this is a Chevy truck podcast the greatest trucks ever built and our good friends at Chevrolet have been a big part of the part of my take story from the Silverado that helped us dig the biggest hole ever dug in Ohio during Grit Week, to Silverado partnering with us to give college fullbacks all the rightful recognition that they deserve with the Lowman Award, to our nonstop cross-country trip to the Super Bowl in LA, it was behind the wheel of a Chevy Silverado, took us through the beautiful Bass Pro Shop pyramid in downtown Memphis, Tennessee, took us through Amarillo, New

Mexico, Arizona all the way to Los Angeles. I own a Chevy. I own two Chevys. I got the El Camino which I guess technically is a Chevy truck and that thing is Pyrrhen. The summer's awesome driving a Chevy around. Chevy Silverado is a longtime awesome partner of the show. It's a truck with commanding unstoppable grit, legendary capability, and dependability too. So find out for yourself, like so many other AWLs, go to chevy.com, check out all the Chevy truck grit, build your own Silverado from do it yourself projects to road trips, off-road adventures, tailgates, whatever your thing is.

It all starts with a Chevy truck. Coach Vrabel was also brought to you by part of my cheesesteak. Part of my cheesesteak is delicious. I order a part of my cheesesteak. Part of my cheesesteak is delicious. I order part of my cheesesteak probably twice a month. Just secret chop it, see how it tastes. Still tastes great. And guess what? We're officially less than 50 days away from NFL kickoff. I'm gonna repeat that. Less than 50 days away from NFL kickoff. Football is gonna be here before we know it. We can taste it and it tastes just as good as part of my cheesesteak's new menu items. There's no better game day food than part of my cheesesteak.

We've been hard at work in the kitchen adding new menu items throughout the summer to prepare for fall. The latest launch is the Buffalo Tinder Loaded Fries, which consists of classic chicken strips that are fried, chopped, and tossed in buffalo sauce. Then they're tossed onto fries with cheese sauce, all topped with ranch and chopped pickles. We also just rolled out the new Buffalo Tender Sub. It's already very popular, but the fan favorite is still the Big Cat Combo.

You get a choice of cheese steak, fries, and a drink. For dessert, try the donut dippers, delicious donut holes. They're tossed in cinnamon sugar. And they're served with a rich caramel sauce. Wash it down with Mac Special, get two sodas, find a Part of My Cheesesteak near you, order yours now at PartOfMyCheesesteak.com and you can use code PMC20 for 20% off your order.

That's PMC20 for 20% off your order. And now here's Gary Veeder. And now for something completely different. Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is comedian Gary Veeder, who is here for his comedy, but also for his podcast that is out now. It's called Number One Dad. I've listened to every episode. It's an insane story, so we wanted to have you on talk about it There's a very weird and awesome sports angle to it

So let's start there. Let's start with number one dad First of all, thank you for coming in here. Totally Do you want to give it like a quick? Yeah. Yeah, I'll give a background Yeah background and then we have a tardis and. And kind of where the podcast picks up, it's my dad and I, we had an extremely complicated relationship, but back in the early 90s, my dad, for one, he's a con man. Yes.

To get that right out there. He's a con man and we stopped talking 24 years ago. But back in the early 90s, him and I, we shared this special moment where one of the cons involved me where We would go to Madison Square Garden. He'd call up ahead he say that we work for Sports Illustrated for Kids that I was a reporter and he was a photographer and When we'd arrive at the garden they'd give us press passes to these games back in the 90s between 93 and 97 and we went to over 50 games completely for

free without tickets and back in the 90s, between 93 and 97. And we went to over 50 games completely for free without tickets, and they gave us access to the locker rooms also, so when we would go there, not only would I meet the players, but I would keep up appearances, and I would also interview the players as well. So I met all the New York Rangers back in the 90s, I met all the Knicks back in the 90s,

and then if they're playing a cool opposing team, especially like the Bulls when they came tos, and then if they're playing a cool opposing team, especially like the Bulls when they came to town and Michael Jordan was there, I met and interviewed Michael Jordan as well. That's crazy. Would you actually write stories? No, we wouldn't even write stories. Then that was the thing, nobody asked because over time, for one, people just believed us

because after they see you a few times, they're like, oh, here you are again. So it's all good. But they never questioned us They never asked to see any articles or anything like that But I would come around with like a notepad and a pen and I would ask questions Mostly like, you know bullshit questions would be like what's your favorite food or what's your best advice for a kid? That you know wants to maybe one day be an athlete So it's things like that things that they would actually ask in Sports Illustrated for kids. It's crazy. And obviously the whole podcast is, you know,

about your dad and he has a ton of different cons that broke apart your family and like was very hurtful. But this one, when I first saw this one I was like, oh shit, this is insane because there's pictures of you with Michael Jordan and Patrick Ewing. Now how old are you when this happened? So I was between the ages of 9 to 13 when we're doing the Si for kids scam Did you have any idea that like you were just you were part of this con or were you like cuz there's there's like nine Years old I could see a nine-year-old not fully understanding and being like this is just the coolest thing ever for sure

I mean I knew a hundred percent my dad I was kind of groomed into hope my dad I think, wanting me to be like him. Wanting me to be this kind of con man, this fast talker, a guy who had a lot of street smarts. So very early on, my dad was operating like this in just everything he would do. If we're going to a restaurant, he's trying to cop a free meal by,

whether he's bartering or might he own the pay phone slash telecommunications business, their phones would just be magically out somehow. I would always think that my dad would cut wires and things like that and we'd be getting a free meal because they needed somebody to repair the phone system. So I was seeing my dad operate on a certain level. So when it came time to do the S.I. for kids scam I was very familiar with how my dad operated that I knew that it wasn't who we were who we were yeah but that we would just have to keep up this this ploy to actually get in so there was no part of you that was like when you get si for I

remember getting si for kids when I was a kid there was no part of you that was like I'm gonna see my article in here no no you're just like this is what we do to get tickets oh for sure and my dad would take the pictures and he would use these pictures to show off to people. If we went to restaurants, he'd be like, oh, look, this is who my son meets, to kind of give him a higher profile. He always just loved bragging about different stuff,

his accomplishments, he loved lying. So him succeeding in this particular lie definitely brought him joy. Yeah, so did you tell any of your friends that you were writing for Sports Illustrated for Kids? No, never told them. And that was part of my dad's thing. He knew that, however, if I was to tell somebody, they wouldn't understand it and then it would

also get back to him. So we kept it very hush. Later on, as time, I was like, I want to share these moments. I want to share that I met Michael Jordan with people. So my dad agreed that we could tell people that he knew somebody at the garden and that's how we had access. Okay. So it was never, you know, being a completely somebody at the garden and that's how we had access. Okay. So it was never, you know, being a completely forthcoming or anything like that.

Yeah, go ahead. Was there like a moment growing up where you realized that like a lot of what dad says is bullshit? Oh yeah. And it becomes a point where you're like, damn, can't you just be like a normal dad? Right. That's all you want. You just want your dad to be normal at a certain point.

You're living this cool, this cool moment where you're going to these games and all my friends, they weren't able to go to see. I went to Rangers game seven Stanley Cup. Game one, game five, and game seven without a ticket. Game seven I sat glass and watched the Rangers win the cup. Went to locker room after the game watching them drink from the cup. Went to the after party. Holy shit.

Then I go to school the next day. I can't share with anybody, but I just, I wish that I could have. I wish I could have been like, my dad and I, we did this thing. But you have to keep it quiet because you don't wanna not be able to do it. And I didn't know what the repercussions were about lying.

I just knew that it probably wouldn't be good. We probably wouldn't be seen in a good light. Have any of the, so when you went, you posted the first, uh, like story about this during COVID, right? And so you posted like, Hey, I lived this life as a fake sports illustrator, kids reporter. Well, the last dance just came out. So that, so it kind of brought it up. And my son was just born. So I was like, maybe I should just start sharing this.

And I would tell people like Nate Barghetti and my friends in comedy all about it when we were when we were like starting out and they're like oh this is so insane and I just I didn't really find the right time to say it and then having a kid of my own kindly kind of brought this out more of why you know make maybe make maybe question why did my dad do this why what were his did he even do it for me was he doing it for himself or was he was he actually wanting to show his kid a good time? And this is the only way he could show it yeah, and then kind of made me wonder What has he been up to after all this time because like I said we haven't talked we have had no communication in 24 years and And yeah, I wanted to see what he's up to when you went public with it

Did any of the I would assume none of the athletes reached out, but did anyone reach out like from Madison Square Garden or anyone being like, hey, this is crazy, I remember this? No, nobody reached out. The only, I mean, Sports Illustrated reached out just so I could write an article for them. And then they went under, so I don't know if that was because of me.

But besides that, I would say, yeah, nobody did. And it was before Dolan So I think I and I've been to Madison Square Garden I went through like the private entrance before and it's it's after that article came out and everything So I think I'm good on Dolan's terms, but other than that, it was pre Dolan So I think everybody's gone from the garden by that at this point The craziest part to me is so you're a professional comedian you and I want to talk about you you won Did you win America's Got Talent? No, I I was a finalist the finalist. I lost to a

Magician or somebody it's always a magician or some guy that like invents a musical instrument that yeah entire room Yeah, yeah, but so so you you've been doing comedy for a long time and comedy You know, we have a bunch of comedians on we have friends that are comedians It feels like most comedians tell a lot of personal stories You just didn't tell this story through all your comedy all these years. Yeah, never never told it It was one of the ones where I cut I wouldn't even mention my dad in my act I didn't want anything to do with them. I completely cut them off. It was just too much bringing them up. And then I needed a kind of a right platform to bring out the story. And then so I thought that this podcast would be it. Yeah. It's kind of beautiful

to you ended up becoming a sports illustrated columnist. Yeah. Your dad lied about you being a 20. Yeah. 24 years later. And you're like, I would hope that you're in the podcast is really, really well done. Everyone should go listen to it. But I would like I would hope that you're I mean the podcast is really really well done everyone should go listen to it But I would I would assume you're making money now off your day. It's like you're kind of getting them back Yeah, he exploited me and that's my chance to write you. Yeah. Yeah, he put you through all this everything Yeah, this is everything he taught me. Yeah, right. It's coming right back a little circle. Yeah, that's crazy the the other one that you mentioned it there for the pay phones. I don't know if you listen to it yet, PFT,

but your dad basically went around selling pay phones pretending to be AT&T, even though he had no relation with AT&T. Yeah, my dad was a master at pretending and posturing people. He could be somebody, anybody he really wanted to be. And as soon as he saw something as simple as this is, but with AT&T, he owned and operated his own payphone

slash telecommunications business. And he would go and get accounts by saying that he personally was AT&T. They didn't know that he was just a one person to, maybe he had four people max working for him at a time, but this very small company. And he'd get accounts like Toys R Us and Costco, and he'd put in all their payphone systems and all that.

And this is, I mean, this is one of the big money back then. And they had no idea they weren't actually working with AT&T. So like when he'd send them a bill, would it say AT&T on the bill? Yeah, he would forge it. He would have their insignia and their symbol on there and their logo, and if you called my dad's phone,

it would have the AT&T chime on it. So they fully believe that they're in business with AT&T. And then he would give, when they would change over managers, he would give them a commission, and then if they move managers, sometimes he wouldn't give them commission, things like that, just finding ways to weasel his way in and out of certain deals Was he always on the look for a scam like where would he go about his day and be like?

Oh, that's something I can I can take it I'm gonna circle back on that one later like or was this just about like you know get a meal here there He'd have a couple big ideas every now and again like the sports illiterate for kids Or was this like an everyday thing where you always had a new project? Everything, everything he did. So before what predated the AT&T thing, he had a furniture business and he would give some people their furniture

and then some people not. And this is back in the 80s. So finding out where my furniture is back in the 80s, you have to jump through hoops. You could call the Better Business Bureau, but are you one of, you know, you know, two people complaining about this furniture company or, you know, how long do you have to wait on the phone, this whole process, or, and this guy's saying, meanwhile, my father's saying, I did send you your furniture. You do have it. What are you talking about?

This person's lying. So, your word against his, and eventually, people, enough people complain about my father. He wanted to be in court, the attorney general, New York State Attorney General filed suit against him. And apparently my dad, it was something over like $100,000 that he took from people back in the 80s, which is equivalent of like 400,000, 500,000 now. And all these scams do feel like you couldn't pull them off today.

A lot of them, yeah, you can't. Now, a lot of my dad's scams, it's simplicity, it's him saying he is somebody and then somebody buying it, the AT&T thing, the Sports Illustrated. So a lot of people look at certain scams as, to get into Madison Square Garden, I'm gonna have to jimmy a lock and then slide in through a back door. My dad's just gonna walk through that front door

because you're gonna give him access. A lot of his things are figuring out a way in the most simple way to get in. Yeah, I'm ashamed to admit this, but it wasn't until about two years ago that I realized that con man didn't mean con like you're tricking somebody, con means confidence. And so if you just do something with enough confidence

and you act the part, then people just let let you we've always said that the easiest way to get into places is if you have a clipboard and maybe like one of those orange day glow vests and an earpiece. Yeah. Yeah. No one's golf cart if you're on a golf cart with a clipboard. Go ahead. Go get in anywhere in America. But yeah so so your dad was like a very confident person in everything he was doing. Oh absolutely. Would he like change his style or was always like a very assertive aggressive guy? He was always like I mean very assertive but you know if he was talking to somebody who is is like Israeli he could put on like a Hebrew accent or Russian he's figuring that out French he's all of a sudden he could like speak French so he's a

smart guy so he knew what to say to make certain people like him. Yeah. Yeah. So he could always figure out something. The psychology of it is, is so fascinating to me because I've, I've dealt with a couple people in my life who are, you know, I think your dad is probably to the like very far extreme, but like I used to have to manage property in my old career. And I dealt with someone who, they moved into an apartment and they made a list of 300 things to complain about. And their whole plan was, you can't fix 300 things,

so I'm just not gonna pay rent for three months until you finally kick me out. And then I looked it up after. It was like, I was very naive. I looked it up after the person was in all these court cases and that was their entire thing. They just go from apartment to apartment, knowing that they could live off of people

for long enough to then go to the next one. Yeah, they just figure out a way. And they just, it's like, I think there's such a fascinating thing where like, most people are trusting and most people wanna take people at face value. So if you have this sociopathic brain, you can take advantage of anyone for sure. And now some people are not going to buy your bullshit, but for the most part, a lot of people are right.

I mean, not everybody think when somebody's talking to you, you're thinking that they're going to be telling you the truth. Right. Even on the street. Oh, I need, you know, anyway, directions for this, by the way, could I have, you know, $5, I have no money. It's like, well, now I gave you directions, you already had a conversation, maybe now I am gonna give you $5. You know, it's like that was their whole intent, but they got you kinda talking or whatever.

People just figure out a way, because they don't think that they're gonna be lied to. Right, and it's like, it's kind of a scary life hack it's it's actually almost I was thinking about it more because again this podcast is so so good And I was listening to it all weekend Thank you It's like it's like the people like in homeowners associations who complain and complain and complain and they know that if they complain enough They'll just wear everyone else down right and it's like if you if you're just in, if you just annoy people to a point that they just give up, that is like a weird life hack that's a loophole

that you can use. And it seemed like your dad kind of had that figured out. He's like, people will eventually give up because I won't. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm not gonna give you your furniture because I know that it's gonna be pretty hard for you to figure this out, or maybe you don't wanna put in the time, so I'm gonna get away with this for a while.

But yeah, back to the confidence thing, yeah, my dad, he kind of operated on a thing where, when we're all young, you kind of like, I could do this thing, I'm gonna sneak into Six Flags or something like that, I'm gonna figure something out. But when you get older, you're like, oh, I don't wanna deal with the consequences. I think as my dad got older, he really just didn't care,

continued not to care about the consequences. He just had that mentality, like, I'm gonna go through with this, I'm gonna figure out how to get by, and if I get caught, I'm not gonna be embarrassed, it just is what it is. Did he ever get caught in front of you? Yeah, I mean, there was one time we were at a diner, and I had like a small cut on my hand

because there was some glass on the table and my dad just went up to, I guess the manager of this diner and said that my son is bleeding, you know, you should comp our meal. And I was with a friend at the time. Next thing I know, my dad was getting thrown out of the diner. So it's these little things where you don't want your father to be doing that. There's no reason for him to ask for a free meal and who knows exactly what he said to them.

But next thing you know, he's having the cops called on them and eventually he like, he pressed charges against them. And he still got, he got more money out of the old. Yeah, it's the complaining things. Like if you keep pushing, someone's gonna give up because they're like, I don't want to deal with this. Exactly.

That's crazy. Is there anything that you've taken from him that he taught you either knowingly or unknowingly that you've been able to use to your advantage? Either, obviously the podcast, the stories. Right, right. Big thing, but just like his mannerisms or how he approaches people in a conversation. I would just say that basically how people take you at face value. Yeah.

So you could really use that, you know, to your advantage, but you don't want to use it. I didn't want to be anything like my dad, but in terms of comedy, if anything, it just taught me, you know, if you could be confident, if you use your skill set in a positive way, you might be able to do something actually with your life as opposed.

My dad would say that he was a cop. He would say that he was a lawyer. He didn't impersonate these people. He would say that he's a photographer. And these are things that he all probably could have done on his own if he actually worked hard, but he chose not to. Yeah, because he does sound like a very smart guy.

Yeah, and he was funny too. So I saw all this, that he had the capabilities of being a different person, but he chose to, he loved lying, he loved conning, and it seemed that that really brought him joy. Well as a comedian it's interesting because that's probably the one line of work where you can't lie about it, you can't fake it.

You can't fake it. You can fake comedy, a lot of comics, you go on stage and you're still in front of an audience. You have to act more confident than you actually are. So it does play some sort of a role, but yeah, for the most part, there is vulnerability. Vulnerability, and I can't even say that word, but it's a good one.

Yeah, if you're funny, you're funny. Yeah, yeah. Like you can, I guess you could steal a lot of people's jokes. Yeah, you could say, yeah, but there's you can't I guess you could steal other people's jokes. Yeah Yeah, but there's still some yeah, there's still some truth in who you are on stage for sure Yeah, so now that you're a father Are you worried like your son is gonna have like if he shows signs of? Man early cuz it is it does I I don't know the actual psychology of it

But it does feel like this is something that some people are just born with where they have that sociopathic ability to lie and they never relent on their lying. Yeah, I think whatever made my dad do it, it might have been his upbringing, his need to see that he couldn't afford things, and then he was like, how am I gonna get certain

material goods? But in my son's case, I think if you just try and teach them right Yeah, hopefully they and and tell them to be honest and and say that's not a good way to go about your life Hopefully that they they stay clear of that Yeah, funny cuz like every kid has moments where they they bang their arm on something and then it's a big deal And they act like they're hurt. It's a perfectly normal thing for a kid to do. But maybe you look at your kid, you're like, oh no. He's trying to sue me.

He wakes up the next day, and he had neck brace being like, dad, where's our settlement? That's looking fall. You know what, my son does now, and I mean, kids are, how old are your kids? Five, three, and one. Okay, yeah, so I have a four and one year old now. And my four year old, he'll say sorry about stuff, he'll hit his brother and be like,

I'm so sorry after he does it. But he's saying it just so he could, you know, what else are we gonna be like, well you shouldn't do that, and he goes, I'm sorry. No, they know it's easy way out. Yeah, it's a very very good tactic at manipulating. Yeah, so they had so kids have it and it just depends How you you kind of maneuver around it? They're gonna write wrong. Yeah, no, that's true. My son does the I'll say sorry if you say sorry I'm like, what the fuck? How did you get that? And then obviously I'll just be like, yeah, I guess I'm sorry. Yeah

That way we can move on. Yeah Yeah, yeah, my kid will do that too that to it be like say you're sorry for Raising your voice. Yeah, right yelling. I'm like, yeah I just said don't do that. Yeah, like well that was too loud, right? Yeah Yeah, the kids kids are little con men, right? Um, how bad Was it looking back on pictures and seeing your bowl cut. Oh my God, I would have done anything. That's probably actually why I didn't share the story forever, I went bald on purpose.

But it was, that bowl cut is horrendous, but it was the 90s and that's what they did. And I, the guy who, I had a guy who's cutting my hair, and I guess he was probably just bored, he just kept on doing it every single time. I probably, I definitely had the bowl cut probably too long. I probably had it going into 2000. Yeah, because it's like, oh sick,

you got a picture with MJ. I know. Bowl cut. I know, yeah. Oh, it was terrible. So how did this end? How did you guys decide, okay, the Sports Illustrated for Kids thing,

I'm too old for that now. I started getting fed up with all the stuff my dad was lying about. He wasn't treating my mom well, my sisters and myself, and we'd be going to these games lying. I wanted eventually a real relationship with my father that I saw was nonexistent. I saw all my friends had it,

and I was also getting older, and there was always a chance that I could run into somebody that I knew at the garden, a friend that was there. So that was always on the back of my mind and I felt that it was kind of at its course. So I was about to be probably close to 14 at the time. And I just said, you know, we gotta just stop doing it. And my relationship with my dad was kind of fizzling out.

Yeah, and you did say the anecdote that you would, when you went there, you would like go as, you know, your fake press credentials, but then you would never sit with your dad you'd sit yeah so you're nine years old never actually having that the father-son experience going to a sporting event with right with your dad you're sitting by yourself yeah wouldn't yeah I would sit in the press area or if he found me a seat I'd be in another part of the arena where he would be taking pictures on the floor or like he would have his camera through through the glass.

That's crazy. Yeah, so he would actually take the pictures though because he was, was he like your photographer? He was my photographer and wouldn't say that he was my father either which was totally unnecessary. He could have said that he was my father but I think that he just enjoyed not saying that he was my father and that he was a professional photographer and I was kind of this prodigy kid reporter. Yeah, yeah, I mean, yeah, he sounds like he got high off the lie. Yeah.

Where it's just like lying to someone makes you, it's wild. I think everyone's probably had an experience. We know somebody like that. Yeah, we know somebody. Yeah. It's like, dude, just tell the truth. It would be so much easier if you just told us the truth

instead of lying and then when we say it's a lie, you're like, well, just tell the truth. It would be so much easier if you just told us the truth instead of lying, and then when we say it's a lie, you're like, well, no, it's not. It's like, why are we doing this? Yeah, and I went to tons of therapy over time just to teach myself not to lie. I would lie with my wife about things I don't even need to lie about, and then she'd be very upset with it.

When I saw Top Gun Maverick, I didn't tell her about it. And then she was like, you wanna go see it? And I'm like, sure. And she's like, you saw it already, right? And I'm like, no. And she's like, you saw it. I'm like, yes.

And then she got so furious with me. But it was such a pointless lie. Right, no reason to lie. In her mind, she's like, if you're lying about that, what else are you lying about? Right, right, wow. That's crazy. So have you made like a plan for the podcast of all the different storylines

you can go down? Are you, are you like rediscovering? Are you re-remembering some of these old things? Like for sure. It feels like doing the podcast itself might be almost a therapeutic experience. Definitely therapeutic because a lot of the stories I buried, I had them so far in the back of my mind I wasn't thinking about it and then as a more I thought and then I started interviewing different people but my sisters and of course talking to

old people that that work for my dad and it just brought back tons of old memories and then just going to therapy I would be like oh my god we counterfeited money together you know know, we would get in, he would purposely get in fender benders and say, you know, act like my neck hurts also just so he could collect on an insurance claim. So these things, you know, getting thrown out of that restaurant, these are all things that I completely forgot about. You know, when we would go to a movie theater back when I was, I remember five years old, the first thing that we would do is I would sneak under the ropes and then he would go find me and it's normal. Who hasn't snuck to a movie theater, back when I was, I remember five years old, the first thing that we would do is

I would sneak under the ropes and then he would go find me. And it's normal, who hasn't snuck into a movie theater? But not with your dad. Right. So, and I didn't think, I knew my childhood was messed up. But I didn't think that it was as messed up because I'll get responses from people, be like, oh my God, I can't believe you went through this.

And I was like, oh yeah, I guess my, part of my childhood, you know, I missed out on certain things, or at least a normal relationship with a parent. Yeah, it's like the stories going to Madison Square Garden sounds very cool, and then you're like, but it was also with your dad who was supposed to have a relationship

with like, that's not running cons. I don't understand how he never got arrested. Yes, everything that I've been able to find, he never has been arrested. And since 1984, he's been involved in, that I've been able to find 23 court cases. Jeez. And that's just what I've been able to find.

And these are only the stories that I know. And there's gotta be so many more that he has that maybe he'll share and we'll find out. You also told the story, he was not in the mafia, but he knew mafia guys and would hang out with them? Would he take you to those places? Yeah, I never went to this place. There's a place called Wiggles and my dad installed their payphone system and all their

communication was done by his company. And this strip club, Wiggles, was owned by this guy, Vinnie Palermo, who was the head of the DeCavocanti crime family, and some people say that that's who Tony Soprano is based off of. And apparently, and this comes from one of my dad's ex-employees, is that he found a bug in their phone, and from that point on, these guys were completely indebted to him. And that's the word that came from one of my dad's employees,

and then knowing my father, most more than likely, he planted the bug, told him that, just so he could be on good terms with them. False flag, he's the hero. Yeah. So it seems, I'm not a licensed therapist obviously, but it seems like a lot of the stuff that a con man would do is rooted in deep, deep insecurity for themselves. Yeah. Like every interaction that you have, you

have to feel like you're getting one over on somebody, like you're smarter than them, like you're better than them. For sure. These people who are successful, you know, to everybody else, let me feel better than they are. Yeah, I'm better than that guy. Everyone thinks he's high and mighty. Tell you what, I'm gonna trick him, and now I feel good. Was he ever like that? Was he conning you? My thing with him was I played sports,

I played baseball, and I played hockey. And in those senses, he would take what I was doing and use it to his advantage. If I was playing baseball, he would have to be the coach. All of a sudden, equipment for the team would be missing. And I assume that he was selling it. And he was responsible for it in the clubhouse that he had access to for a little league.

In hockey, he was, hockey basically, this is early on, where they kind of started having AAU teams, especially during my age of growing up in the 90s, and he started his own AAU hockey team essentially, and he would overcharge the parents, and I would be playing on these teams, I wouldn't deserve to be playing on these teams, he would have really great players, some went on to play D1 and in the NHL as well But he would overcharge their parents and he would make money off of them meanwhile I love playing hockey, but then you're hearing parents complaining about your father Overcharging them when you know hotels shouldn't cost four hundred dollars. It should cost a hundred dollars, right?

Yeah And he'd be charging these people and making money off of them and then kind of putting a bad taste in their mouths about him and then I'm hearing about it on the bench, of course. It sounds like a lot of complications that you have to deal with as a kid. Oh, non-stop.

And I could see why that relationship would probably get fractured at some point. Now that you're doing the podcast and you're talking about all these stories, at some point he's going to hear the podcast, right? Yeah, do you think he has already I? I don't know. I haven't I haven't heard from him since the podcast has come out So as far as I know he hasn't unless he's preparing a lawsuit. Mm-hmm. Oh, that's gotta be a concern

Yeah, I mean I maybe that would be season two. you want oh shit do you want we probably get sued? Having you in here. Yeah Guy never done anything never told like in his life. Yeah. Yeah, would you want him to reach out? You know so I mean the way the podcast is going right now is that I I mean I I tracked him down I have his phone number and that was episode that just came out today so the next thing is just to wait and see we're supposed to meet face to face in the podcast okay going to the Second Avenue deli yeah Jesus all right so your comedy career so you what when did it

start when did you what was your first like big break or was it America's Got Talent no first big break was Conan I did Conan in 2014 and then that was the first time I was ever on TV and then the Booker at the time he saw me at a Comedy festival in Portland just randomly and it was there's nobody in the room and fortunately enough at I went on second And he was still in he was still there, and I I did well and then I got booked for Conan maybe like a month later. That's awesome. Yeah.

That was one to do Conan. Yeah. So you did Conan and then was it from that point on it was like everything started opening up a little bit? Yeah. It started opening up, started touring more, started headlining and then I got America's Got Talent and then going pretty far in that that helped get an agent and manager and And then some more gigs and then you know fortunately enough a lot of my friends They started doing well, too

So guys like Nate and Sam Morrell and yeah guys that I've toured with Salvocano so their careers exploding as the friends help friends in comedy And that's kind of been the best thing better than any agent or manager Yeah, they've been definitely a deep part of any type of success that I've had. I love that part about comedy where it's like, there's little groups and if one of them, you know, quote unquote, makes it to that like,

big supernova level, they kind of bring everyone along for the ride. Yeah, and I didn't know that going into comedy. You just kind of, you think it's very secluded, that you're just gonna be in isolation all the time writing jokes But you meet a lot of people who have maybe similar past to you or or could at least understand your past And that's been a cool thing and then those become your best friends Yeah, has Nate ever sworn around you never now yeah, I try getting them every time. Yeah, it doesn't doesn't do it

Is it you won't say damn? No, he told me to not say damn, actually. Really? To clean it up? I was like, damn. Damn, is it weird watching Nate with his dad who like, his dad does shows with him and it's like, he's incredible, very funny.

It's so perfect. And his dad loves the podcast and he loves the sports stuff. So it's, but it's such a different relationship than I had with my father Yeah, they're so close to yet Nate's dad opens for him. Yeah, and it's it's super cool. What are the Knicks back? I Think oh my god. Yeah, and especially getting bridges. It's insane. Yeah, I love it. Oh, no, no Knicks. Yeah. Yeah, it's crazy None of your like sports

Fandom was diminished at all by any of these things For yeah, I mean well also the Knicks and the Rangers had some bad years like sports fandom was diminished at all by any of these things. Was it? For, yeah. I mean, but also the Knicks and the Rangers had some bad years in the 2000s, so that kind of affected it. So I took a step away from sports, especially with my dad, as I mentioned, getting involved in hockey. I was like, let me just put the skates down, the stick down and the skates, because I couldn't be around ice hockey anymore.

By the time I was 17 Yeah, and then and then I'm back in it now. Yeah, you kind of just sports just just warms your heart You love it. It draws you back in especially when you have kids to exactly. I want to share these moments completely Yeah at the garden, especially like these playoffs were just incredible the atmosphere there like I get it I understand why people say Madison Square Garden is like the mecca of basketball when you see them win a playoff game and they go nuts It was just it felt pretty special this year. So they yeah, the Villanova Knicks They've got like every player from that college. Do you want Jay Wright to coach the team?

I mean, if he came back, that would be insane. But I mean right now they're great. I mean, I think that I think coaching is kind of set but I think that they could definitely make a run. But other teams are making moves too. Yeah. The it's it's fun. It's fun. Like we lived in New York for seven years and I I hate to admit it but like when you go to a Knicks playoff game there is a different vibe to it. And it's better for best, if the Knicks are doing well, it's better for best, but same with hockey, if the Rangers are doing well.

Yeah, I mean, ESPN just sucks their dick the whole time. Yeah, yeah. The Pacers weren't even in that series. Right, right. It was just the Knicks. Yeah, Brunson is amazing, and I met him at a game, and he's such a nice guy, and you always hear great stories about him,

and he'll help old people, he's a superhero. Yeah Dante de Vincenzo, too He's that that dude seems awesome. Oh, he's Cool that they just seem like cool, dude. Yeah. Yeah, see Brunson's helping old people Yeah, I heard a story that like one of Sam's cousin Samaral's cousins said that They helped Brunson helped and his wife. I think or girlfriend helped their grandparents like carrying their groceries Sam can't be trusted though with the Knicks He's just going around just doing like gorilla marketing for them Like yeah you hear Brunson he saved like a bunch of puppies

Exactly yeah yeah What? Okay sounds good What about on the baseball front? Baseball front I mean I like the Yanke, but I'm not diehard in any which way. And I did love baseball at one point and now I know you guys are huge baseball guys. Oh yeah, huge. Huge. Are you being facetious? Oh no, I thought you were. No, we just did our, we do a fantasy league called Dingers Only.

Okay. Where we just draft nine players and the only stat is home runs. Okay. And we start at July 3rd July 3rd like three months into this yeah, yeah, we drafted like half players that were on the I mean baseball to me is all okay. Yeah, the what's his name Christian your yeah, yeah, so we yeah It's a whole yeah, I don't know I have to Nate would not want to hear this story Yeah, we we told him when he before him when he was on the Marlins, so before he was hitting like a ton of home runs, he was like, I think I could win a home run derby.

We were like, no, you can't. And there was a porn doppelganger of him who there was a video of a guy who looked exactly like Christian Yelich eating a girl's ass. So we said, stupidly, if you ever win the home run derby, we'll eat each other's ass. And the one year that he, did he win MVP? I think he won MVP that year. He got hurt right before the Derby, so we dodged that.

But I think he's gonna be in the Derby this year, so we might have to eat each other's ass. He could end this podcast. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, really stupid. Or make some good money, you know, people get into that. But at what cost right?

It would just be Bella. I don't know if I could look big cat in the eye Yeah, you won't have to yeah the brown. Yeah, it's it's gonna be bad That's actually a really bad thing that like is in the back of my dad. Yeah, yeah, just bury it And there's every now and then it comes up and triggers a memory right we're like oh fuck We have to get to say that go to therapy We should actually have a therapist on the show. Like in Billions, how they have Wendy that just sits in the corner.

Oh yeah, you need somebody, yeah. Yeah, what's the hardest part about comedy? Hardest part, I mean, coming up with new jokes is super hard, because you might think you have a new joke, then you have to test it on stage, and then it might not work. Are you gonna use your dad now? Like, cause that, that feels like a treasure trove

of material. I might, I'm definitely, you know, letting so much out in the podcast, so I mean, I do sprinkle it in a little bit in my set right now, so we'll see how it goes and as time goes on, but yeah, if there's room for it, so you know, now that people know the story and then you know if they come to see me that gives it a little bit more weight so it kind of helps. Yeah the, it must be a weird feeling too now that you're a public figure knowing that all

this time your dad probably was still scamming using your name. Yeah telling people wherever he goes and be like that's my son for sure. Like that's crazy to think about, that he probably was. Yeah, I've thought about that. And I had concerns about him even showing up into my life before I went and approached him until now, which was when my wife and I got married, we had to tell security at the wedding venue,

this is what my father looks like, make sure you don't let him in, because who knows, maybe he shows up and dresses up as a waiter. Yeah, that would be wild though, This is what my father looks like make sure you don't let him in because who know we like maybe shows up and dressed Up as a waiter. Yeah. Yeah, that would be that'd be wild though If you got super super famous most popular stand-up comedian in America, and then your dad's out there somewhere telling everyone That's my son and they're like dude sup bullshit. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, it's no one is the route the only Yeah, yeah, that's it that could very well happen. Yeah, maybe I were rooting for you the

So so the whole story and everything coming out have have your friend What is your friend's reactions been are they like well now I understand you a little more like cuz it is my wife says that now Really? Yeah, she's like oh wow you mean you really I mean she knows all this stuff, but now just hearing it and you're like, oh, you could have went one, I mean, there's only one or two ways. There's no in the middle. You have to, you're either going extreme, extreme liar or you're gonna be,

I like to think decently honest, pretty honest. So I try and tell the truth and be a good person, be a good father, because I could have been a bad father and that was kind of what was taught to me. Maybe you're being a con man right now. I know. Maybe none of this is true. Oh, fuck. All of it is true.

This is a big spin. All of his lessons that he kind of gave you. Right. But you're taking fire. It's all made up. Yeah. Your dad's actually literally the number one dad. Yeah.

It's all in plain sight. Yeah, you did that as a joke, but- It's reversed. It's just so my son could have a podcast. the number one dad. Yeah, it's all in plain sight. Yeah, you did that as a joke, but it's reverse Yeah, we saw my son could have a pocket. Yeah, that would actually be a fantastic ending to the podcast Yeah, this has been a con. Here's my dad. He's a sweetheart Yeah, and I just knew that I would get good content out of right But I like what you said and it's and I thought of that recently But he exploited me as a kid trying to use me whether it was sports or you know going to the games together and

Getting what he wants out of those lies, and then now it's kind of my turn. Yeah Yeah, you get back in them. Yeah Can you take what what you've experienced with that and are you better at spotting another con man because oh yeah absolutely I mean also the key is just think everybody's lying to you. Yeah That's one it does like that everybody's full of shit and most most people are I mean you a lot of times you go and you start Talking to people if they're at a party people start bragging about there already 30 lime because you're trying to be entertaining You're trying to sound interesting. Yeah, a lot of a lot of things that people are saying you are Gonna be false. Yeah, and it is that like first feeling of, oh, I just got conned.

Like it does change you where you're like, all right, now I'm looking at everyone and not, like I'm not gonna take them fully at face value. Cause I find myself, I struggle with that where I think I'm too trusting of a person sometimes. And it's like, I could, you know. You're trusting, where the guy, the Stella Blue coffee, last time I was here,

you're like, I'm sending it. And you did, you sent it. I did? Oh, I didn't even do it like I'm sending it and you did you said I did. Yeah. Yeah Oh, I didn't do nice. Fuck. Yes. I did But a lot of times people give you know empty promises and they'll say they're gonna yeah, they don't so You know, you're my good. That's this because you kept your word. You're an honest man That's probably credits a page who's our office measure. Here's is fantastic I probably was like hey send him some so she credit to her she did the hard work right but I at least said please send him so it happened it happened I want to go back to

how I Mandel real quick so America's Got Talent how he's a recurring guest on this show interesting guy yeah he never he never shook your hand right never shook my I've opened for him too he's had me open for him an ACI bomb too It was not a not a fun crowd to perform in front of AC's Oh a lot of trash there And but he's a good guy how he is a good guy So I would assume that doing stand-up comedy for like him and Howard Stern would be you'd be like thinking in the back your head Like oh fuck. This is this Howard Stern. Yes, super cool Yeah, Howard Stern was one of the judges on AGT when I was there and

And Howie being there and you're seeing them because you grew up Listening to them and seeing them on TV and obviously they're both very famous But that is definitely in the back of my mind, but even more so these shows were live. They were live So I'm at Radio City so you have a lot going on where you kind of Don't even care that it's Howie Mandel and Howard Stern Yeah, backstage that must have been quite a scene though like when I think of America's Got Talent and the cast that are on there Yeah, you've got like a guy with seven dogs. You've got acrobats dancers. Oh, it's terrible It's it was awful that whole the whole scene back there It's it's very hectic you're waiting to go on and then you only have a couple minutes to perform on the show and

Meanwhile the person before you My shows they would they would have a singer and they wouldn't even be singing an original song No, I'm on my show. Sometimes they do sing original songs and that's cool But when they're not singing original song and then they're getting a standing ovation, to me it's karaoke. Yeah, right. I'm telling her, I'm doing my joke. Right.

And I wanted to say that to the judges, but then you seem like you're a dick. Yeah, but it's true. And also going out there, sometimes the act before you, they stink and then it's a cold audience and now you've got two minutes, like just jump right into your stand-up routine. Completely.

There's no buildup whatsoever for it. you just gotta yeah like okay I gotta be funny within the first like five seconds of being on stage for sure and comedy works better when there's comedy a little bit before you right an audience just needs to start hearing jokes and just getting warmed up so the whole setting is tough but I whatever the lineup that they had me in it would definitely it worked to my advantage somehow. Was there any reservation of doing America's Got Talent that it was like not a comics comic move?

Like you're kind of doing this thing where people are gonna look at you and be like, it's kind of cheap. For sure. Really? Yeah, in the back of your mind, you just don't wanna, it's kind of an icky feel of you don't wanna be associated with it.

It's not as cool as a Conan or being in the light of, you know, just kind of a cool vibe. Right. Which is a crazy thing to be like, I'd rather grind it out in clubs. Yeah. Have this like be on network television. Right. I guess an advantage is not winning it. Yeah, true. Then you don't have the label, but you still have, oh, I was on and you have cool clips I still feel like a lot of comics or a lot of people from America's Got Talent have

From America's Got Talent after their name. Who's the most famous America's Got Talent person? Jeff Dunham. I don't think he's a puppet guy was he? Who's the most successful brought puppets back? Maybe Gary Vier. Yeah Yeah, it might be you most successful America Gary Vieter and Manny Vieter that just be funny if it was did they do like a puff piece on you or like a sob story yeah I well I lied in my in my sob story I said that I had well there are two things I lied about one I said that I had a roommate at the time because I didn't have material yet about having a girlfriend we were about to get married

so I made up a whole story about having a girlfriend. We were about to get married. So I made up a whole story about having a roommate and that was my backstory. And my roommate was played by comedian Greg Stone and he was kind of just a piece of garbage and he would steal from me. So that was kind of my backstory. But I was actually getting married at that time

and I didn't want to share that with him because I didn't want them to ruin the wedding. So it was either them or my father that I was thinking was to ruin the wedding. It was either them or my father that I was thinking was gonna ruin my wedding. I don't recognize any of these names. Terry Fader, he's an impressionist. A lot of these guys, if you win you get a show in Vegas.

I don't know if they, I'm pretty sure they still do that but yeah, that name sounds familiar. Yeah, it'd be funny if it was just like, if I was scrolling, like Kawhi Leonard. Yeah, yeah. He just went and dri if I was scrolling like a couple kawaii Leonard. Yeah Just went dribbled and was like oh shit, and I only dogs won in season 7. I remember them Yeah, yeah, they're a bunch of like little small white dogs that did all these tricks and jump through hoops and that Franco I don't know. I don't recognize any I was on a season 10 Paul's Erden. Yeah, so you lost to a puppeteer Yeah puppeteer eventual that's brutal. Yeah, it was tough to a puppeteer. Yeah puppeteer ventriloquist. That's brutal dude. Yeah, it was tough

It was really tough. That's the most tragic thing that's ever happened in your life. Yeah You try you do and you try so hard to be funny And this is a set I'm gonna do be doing and you run it even though it's two three minutes that you're gonna be on Stage and then yeah, you lose to a guy who's a ventriloquist What's also tough about America's Got Talent as a comedian is they've got, don't they have the like buzzers, the Xs, if they don't like you? Yeah.

So you can like tell one joke, and then you just hear buzzers, and then you have to keep going until they all likes you out, right? Oh, completely. And Heidi Klum did not like me whatsoever. Oh shit. And she was still pretty attractive back then.

Yeah. So, and also I thought, you know, I loved her, too, growing up. So then hearing that, as part of you as a, you're a kid, when you're talking to one of these people that you knew back then, you know, in your mind. And I remember her saying that she didn't like my comedy. It hurt. But then I'm like, screw her.

She doesn't even know the language. Yeah. Yeah. Good point. Right. You got this. Was it Red Panda on America's Got Got Talent. I don't think so Shin Lim was the big winner I know he's got like a whole act in Vegas feel like that's why she got to stuff. Yeah. Yeah season eight America's Got Talent was red panda red panda. That's where she got discovered from yeah, she should she's the most successful She's the most talented person. Yeah. All right, I have a couple last questions.

Appreciate you coming by. Everyone go listen to Number One Dad. It's an incredible podcast. Last couple questions, Roeback question, rhoback.com promo code take. 20% off your first purchase, Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, roeback.com promo code take.

Do you think there's gonna be a movie or a show out of this? Right now working on writing up a TV show? Yeah, and any cameos. Oh, I've saw casting. I think I could see you guys We're we we are like we strike out on every cameo No, but if it was up to me, I want to throw in as many of my friends as possible Yeah, it's super cool. Are you gonna play your dad? That'd be cool I mean, maybe I mean they might need a Bigger name or something I but I would be totally down and I think I could do it Yeah, sure and I think that it would be cool because it could be you know, definitely a nostalgia piece

So back in the 90s, yeah, maybe maybe mix in, you know present-day, especially me being being a father now and stuff like that I think it'd be I think it'd be really cool. But whether it's a TV show or movie, I think it has legs for the role. I agree. What about, so I know probably the answer to this, but has there ever been a small part of you that's like, let's go to a game and pretend that we're someone else?

Yeah, absolutely. Really? Yeah, you wouldn't wanna do it, especially when I had no money. It's all I was thinking. I was like, I could go to these games and I could probably get in and figure out a way. Yeah. And uh, I do know how, but it's, it would make me look so bad. I can't, I can't say, yeah, think of the worst thing. And that's how I'm getting it. One time I tried to sneak into a RFK stadium.

It was the nationals first year and it was the 4th of July. Oh one time. I try to sneak into RFK Stadium. It was the nationals first year, and it was the 4th of July I was drunk I was shirtless and I I went up to the media entrance and I told him I was like yeah You have my name on the list and they're like no we don't what's your name? I told him I was Michael Wilbon and they said no you're not Mike Wilbon He's black and I was like touche that was my that was my biggest experience But Hank our producer he used to sneak in the Boston Garden What like almost every night with butter and with a butter knife? Yeah

he there was one door that had had a latch on it that you could just go up to and wiggle get in the garden and he like early barstool days when the Blackhawks played the Bruins Stanley Cup and Dave and I went to a bunch of the games and we're looking for tickets for one of the games Hank was like we could just Butter knife in and we're like dude We can't like do you imagine the look of us like trying to break into the Stanley Cup right right like, we could just butter knife in and we're like, dude, we can't, like, imagine the look of us like trying to break into the Stanley Cup. Right, right. He just didn't even think about it, he's like,

it'll be no problem, we'll just butter knife in, I know the door. But yeah, he used to do that all the time. One thing I do agree with your dad on, it's fun to sneak in places. Oh yeah. That's very, very. That's a thrill. It's absolutely, you have a rush,

there's something about it, there's something about not paying for something and then getting away with it Yeah, I got to see something that was amazing seeing game seven of the Stanley Cup I was at Jordan that the time I met Jordan was that his double nickel game It's crazy. It just winds up being this historic event that I was able to go to Completely for free and you got you got to interview Jordan one-on-one after I did He was in a private locker room was him Phil Jackson, Phil Jackson, and a few other assistant coaches, and then I just went in there.

I only asked him one, I asked him what his favorite food was, I couldn't, I was so freaking nervous that it was Jordan, and I mean, I could have believed that we were able to do that. And that game, the actual Real Sports Illustrated for kids was there, and this is the only time they ever, they were ever at a game. And it wasn't a kids reporter, it was two adults,

they didn't use kids back then. Wait, what? Yeah, they didn't use kids. So that was another part, nobody even asked that. What the fuck, it was scammed up. It was for kids, not by kids. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, yeah, yeah.

But eventually they wound up using kid reporters, maybe they got it from my dad. But at the game, we found out that they were there, and my dad went up to them and asked them for their business cards. I don't think he let on that we were saying that we were Sports Illustrated for kids, but he said whatever to them, got their business cards,

and when it came time at the end of the game to go in, security let us in, didn't let them in. I go and meet Michael Jordan, we're coming out, and then they were still trying to get in. That's crazy. Yeah, and not only this, we're coming out, and then they were still trying to get in. That's crazy. Yeah, and not only this, I found this out because we interviewed and we had to cut it for the podcast, but I was the last person to interview Michael Jordan

for Sports Illustrated for kids because he didn't take any interviews with Sports Illustrated. They had an article called Baguette Michael, titled Baguette Michael, and from then on, he said, I'm never interviewing with Sports Illustrated again. So you were the only one? Yeah, he let me slide, because mine was in 95, and that article came out in like early 95 or 94.

And you weren't even in Sports Illustrated? Yeah. You need to get in touch with MJ. I know. Listen, your boycott actually stands. Yeah. I didn't actually work for Sports Illustrated. Right, right.

Yeah, it still works. So what was his answer, though? What's his favorite steak? His favorite steak. Yeah. Good choice. Good answer. Good answer. Yeah, steak's sports. Right. Right. Yeah. It still works. Which was his answer, though. What's his favorite state for Stake? Yeah. Good choice. Good answer. Yeah. That's a good stick. Good. Yeah. All right. Well, Gary, thank you, man. Anytime you're in Chicago, you got to come by. We appreciate it. And everyone, please go listen to number one daddy. I can't recommend it enough. It's it's like a very nice,

refreshing change of pace of like it's in the line of a true crime podcast, but you don't have to listen to someone getting murdered. Yeah, yeah. If that's the best, it might be your elevator. Maybe my dad did murder somebody and I don't know about it, but it's not in the podcast. I feel like he didn't have that in him.

Like he just gets off on lies. I think he's the type of person that he could be adjacent to. Yeah. He would never have blood on his hand right right right well thanks so much man and best of luck with everything going on with this podcast in the show thank you both Gary Vito is brought to you by body armor this episode is brought to you by body armor

sports drink I've got the body armor water right here I've got the body armor fruit punch right next to it both delicious both hydration, real ingredients packed with electrolytes, vitamins, nothing artificial. Body Armor Sports Drink has all your hydration needs covered. Sports Drink, light, zero sugar, flash IV, and of course the sport water. That's what I'm drinking right now. Body Armor is the best for post-workouts, pre-workouts, staying hydrated, recovering after a long night out, you name it it Body Armor will keep you hydrated because it's got those electrolytes, vitamins and nothing artificial in there and it tastes great. Head on over to Body Armor store on Amazon use code 15BARSTOOLBA. That's one five barstool BA as in Bravo Alpha for 15% off

your order today. Okay, let's wrap up Fire Fest of the Week. Hank? I have bicep tendonitis in my right arm from hitting dingers. Wait. Sorry to hear that. Hold on. Is that bad for golf? It's terrible for golf.

Why? Because I can't really lift my, it hurts to lift my right arm. So the backswing There's a lot of pain a lot of pain. Yeah, I saw you try to eat an ice cream cone today And when you couldn't eat an ice cream cone, I knew it was significant yeah, I mean, it's not like, you know debilitating pain and and I Talked to a steam doctor aka chiropractor at the office yesterday And he gave me some exercises to work on it feels better today than yesterday Mm-hmm, but I keep doing things and and reaching for things some exercises to work on. It feels better today than yesterday.

But I keep doing things and reaching for things and going to like lift things up and just being like, ah, ah, ah. So yeah, I was trying to eat ice cream and almost died. Here's a good exercise, Hank. Put your elbow kind of down at your side. Bend your arm at 90 degrees. Lower it a little bit. Lower your elbow, yeah, drop your whole arm a little bit wing it down a little bit. No, no like this Hank look at my arm like that bring it down Bring down over to you bend it over to your now start moving your wrist back and forth You don't always yeah like that. There you go. That's good. He's trying to get your jerk off. Yeah. Yeah Just do that a lot. You'll be fine

I'm just searched it that's that's like golfers elbow. Is it the same thing as golfers elbow? I don't know is that what it says? Yeah. Yeah, that's bad So Hank when I fucked my elbow up a couple years ago, you remember that? I had like the the UCL when my my fingers went numb from swinging a golf club. I actually got injected, Billy football injected those research chemicals into my arm and they worked. Now the downside to this is you have to let Billy football inject you with research chemicals, but it worked.

So the question is how bad do you want to golf? We'll see. I'm just going to ride it out and just hope I wake up tomorrow and I'm fine. Oh, that's a wait and see approach. Yeah. Okay. I don't hate that. Ice, heat, ice, heat.

Is that medically advised? Ice, heat, ice, heat. Have you done any of that? Yeah. What's the heat? Like a heating, like a, I have like a heating pad, heating pad for my, when I blew my back out a few years ago. Yeah. I'm pretty sure you just have to go ice or you just have to go heat. I don't know what ice heat, ice heat does. Well, ice is right after you injure it. Yeah. First like swirly at hours. Heat, it can be used when you're like, if he's like actually

going to go out and play, it can help warm up the muscles. I don't know if sitting on your couch, a heat does much, but I'm not a doctor. Well, good luck, Hank. Thank you. Ice is a great choice for the first 72 hours, like I said, so maybe I am a doctor. Heat, on the other hand, helps soothe stiff joints. So I actually nailed that. Heat is what you do when you wanna go play

and you want it to feel like warm and good. Wow. Yeah, I just don't know if you should do both at the same time. No, no, no. Oh, that's hot ice. Well, hot. You said ice heat, ice heat, back and forth. Like ice it and then heating pad. Yeah. Okay. Well, good luck. Thanks. I really want you to be happy because I can't take this, Hank, for the rest of the summer Like I, I think we said it would be a shame if he got hurt and couldn't golf. Now that we're here, it is a shame. It fucking sucks because I need it's like having a dog like on a rainy day. A hyper, a hyper. Yeah. You're like Blake. No, no, no. You're a hyper. No, like Blake is like that. And yet he had two elbow injuries. Yeah. But you couldn't go out and play. And yeah, he was a pain in the ass. Yeah. And you're like Blake. No, no, no, you're a hyperactive dog. No, Blake is like that. And he had two elbow injuries. And he couldn't go out and play. And yeah, he was a pain in the ass.

Yeah, and you're stuck inside. And you're like, man, I wish I could just get my dog to run around. You'd be a lot happier in sleep. We need you to play some golf so you'd be a lot happier in sleep. I actually have some of his old anxiety medication that I use to keep him calm.

Maybe Hank could use some of that. Put a cone on you? You'll have to talk to a dog to make sure that it's okay to take. So we'll have Pug see if you can take that medicine. Yeah I think it should be fine. Yeah. Okay. My Fire Fest of the Week is I've gone down a rabbit hole and I've got a new hobby. Oh because I've gone down a rabbit hole too and I think that the driver actually was the one who shot JFK. But go ahead. Oh, because I've gone down a rabbit hole too and I think that the driver actually was the one who shot JFK. But go ahead. Oh, like way back in the day.

Well, you can bet your ass that it wasn't the story we're being told. Because a Secret Service agent said he found that bullet. That bullet. Dude, I watched one video and it looked like the driver turned around. Either way, I'm down other rabbit holes. Go ahead. Back into the left. So my rabbit hole is just about growing weed. Yeah, so I've been talking to a lot of people about it I think I'm gonna start growing weed on my rooftop, which is legal. It's totally legal for personal use

but they said I got to go to a store and ask for a clone and Then when you get the clone then you can grow it and then the trick is to harvest it before it gets too mature that way I can get my mids nice my perfectly average weed nice and then if it does well maybe I'll experiment with it it does well then maybe we get into the the weed business and we sell PMTHC I like it what do you guys think about that I like it. What do you guys think about that? I Like it. I've gone to down this rabbit hole before The key is when it's you're ready to pluck it. It's drying it out So you got to wait you got it. You got to wait you got to dry it properly or else

You're just gonna spend months growing weed and then you go to smoke it and just wet as hell and pointless Yeah, so I've heard so I need to talk to somebody that has experience in this. My aunt actually grew weed when it became legal in Virginia. She had her own plants, and then she gave me some of it, like in bags. And it was like the most 1960s shake ever with like seeds and stuff. I don't want that.

I want like just decent weed. Also, I've heard if your friend that you're growing it with wants to like pluck it soon because they really just Want to smoke it, but it's like if you're supposed to wait an extra couple weeks, and you get a lot more Yeah, just wait. Okay. My friend tells me that okay. What would you say to people say that you're a drug guy? I'm not a drug guy. Okay marijuana. It's not a drug growing weed. It's an herb. It comes from the earth watch this video Watch this video is this Ravel? No, this is it's not. I don't want to watch this. No, it's fine. This is Ravel. No, I know. No, it's not. It's not. It's not HK. Look,

the driver, the driver turns around. Bang. Oh, yeah. I told you I've been down some rabbit holes. I, I, I unfortunately have gotten into a very bad. I mean, this has to be an edited video. That video, the guy is holding a gun and he's got him in the head. I've got no way that that is the video. That is the most edited video of all time. My algorithm. Turns around with a gun in his hand.

My algorithm is so toxic right now. There's no way. Yeah. I clicked on like three things a week ago and it's gotten crazy. The internet that I've gotten into is crazy. So yeah, I saw this. And yeah, now I think the drivers. I'm I'm not. I'm my mind's still open about this. Yeah, okay. I guess JFK's is fine. Just just just click. Is

that too soon? No, you're good. Just click click more of those videos and you'll you'll see it Yeah, it probably is edited. You're right Hank Yes, have you guys seen the octopus murders on Netflix? No, so it's a crazy crazy documentary series one part of it is this dude who claims to be CIA bring somebody in shows them the video and then Edit something into it and tells them like this is the video that you haven't seen your entire life and then that person spends the rest of their life not knowing what video is real oh shit I'm nuts now I don't know what's real yeah that's all simulation yeah okay my hiccup yes hiccup my fire fest on Tuesday night we hit ding. It was a lot of fun with the boys. But I think I'm officially, officially washed because it was one of those things I had so much fun being out with the guys. I'm not claiming I was ever a great athlete, but I looked at the leaderboard and it was like me

Titus chief Brandon and I did the math and it was like every guy who's 37 plus and Max obviously played college ball like Max was a fucking beast So I would never thought that I was gonna his main dingers max, but it just dawned on me that it might be time I might be time I might be washed Hank did what Hank Hank thought he was gonna hit as many as I don't I don't understand I don't understand Max are you going after this is this is crazy this is like this is good I am a competitive person we are a. Max is by far and away the best hitter. So I'm striving for something. Like you want to be the best and in order to be the best, you have to beat

the best. Now do I think I had any chance of beating Max? No. If we did that a hundred times would I beat him once? Maybe. But like, I think you, I think you thought you were going to beat him at one point. I didn't think I wanted to beat him Yeah, but I never thought I was going to beat him But I don't think there's anything wrong with like wanting to beat the person who's the best here's it here's a question right like I'm not Gonna lie seems crazy was up at the plate were you rooting for him to hit yes because I wanted to leave Are you happy when he didn't hit home? I wanted him to hit home runs was there any point? Where you were rooting for him to not hit home runs? No, if it had gotten closer maybe, but it, it, it. So at the beginning when it was close, it never, no, cause it took me a couple of rounds to get hot. There was a

point where I was like maybe six or seven behind and I would have, but I also was, my arm was fucked. Yeah. Hank was awesome. Yeah. Yeah. No, but I will say like when you came up to me and were like, how many did you hit last round? And then someone was like, are you trying to beat him? You're, you you're like it's keeping me at it. It's me and then competitive drive kept that like I was kind of like cruising and then you said that I was like all right now I just have to hit a home run. So that was good. You did like iron sharp entire. Yes. And then I had that. I can't believe you want to be Mexican. Yes I don't I don't. There's nothing against max. It wouldn't have mattered who, you know, the best person was like, why do something

if you don't want to try and win it? Okay. No, yeah. And it kept me more involved too. I can see both sides. Many fine people on both sides. Yeah. It was fun. It was a lot of fun, but I'm, I'm, I'm watched. It was the first time, I mean, there's been other times, but it was the first real time where I was like, if I were 10 years younger, I feel like I would be hitting more home runs. And I like, I was maxing out everything I had and it wasn't that good. Well, you didn't have to swing that hard, right? Cause there's only 215 feet. Right.

You just make decent contact. No, I wasn't maxing out my swings. I'm saying I was maxing out the fact that I was tired after four swings. I think you I was maxing out the fact that I was tired after four swings. I think you hit the third furthest ball. But still I was just not... That's what... that actually proves my point even more that like I feel like it was there at some point and it's just completely gone now. So that hurts. That hurts. Shout out Evo. He was a fucking beast.

Yeah, Evo was a monster. And like that's the thing. I'm not deluding myself to think if I were 25 years old I Hit the fifth fifth Yeah, if I were 25 years old Max would still kick my ass Evo would still kick my ass I just think I would personally have performed at school is They put my fucking film school. Yeah, they put your film school also Jersey Jerry's just bar stool Yeah, so yeah, it was it was a lot of fun. Thank you for everyone who watched just hitting dingers We got to do it again. It was just we just do it and not even Count it. I'm down to do it. Just casually. Yeah, it was it was no camera much fun taking BP rocks

Yeah, it was so much fun Okay, Matthew. Did you get a fire fest? Yeah, okay a city living Very new for me. Okay, I grew up my house is a next to a farm your country mouse You know, yeah, that's all I know is fresh air and nothing else So yeah, just trying to get like and like trying to get here like a 45 minute walk doesn't seem like that big of a deal to me. But when I said that yesterday, Jerry had a pissy fit when he was like 45 minutes. That's a long, that's a long walk. Yeah. So I don't know, small stuff like that. Uh, there's a bus,

there's a train, there's an Uber. Yeah. Uh, plans, trains and automobiles. Yeah, it's our candy area It's anxiety reduce our anxiety field just trying to pick which one is best for me at that particular time of day So what's your commute like so far? What have you can you ride a bike? Sorry, sorry, I'm sorry. I also really like the way you're wearing your headphones No, no one has worn their headphones like that at all I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I also really like the way you're wearing your headphones No, no one no one has worn their headphones like that at all I'm sorry Matthew My dad thought about bringing an electric bike. Yeah, but I'm like dude I live on the fourth floor so I'm just gonna bring an electric bike up four floors every night You're not gonna be fed after that. Yeah

But yeah, just trying to get get around and understand, you know, get a feel for the streets and the environment. Having roommates is a new thing that's not family. So that's, you know, I feel like I can't be as comfortable with them. Are they random roommates? Just random guys. Yeah. Yeah, they're dudes.

They're normal, like 30-year-old guys, you know, normal jobs and stuff, nine to five. So kind of can go off of that, but yeah What do you think they don't know anything like your vibe so far? They like parcel dude I don't know anything about these people you don't see him I saw the one guy he leaves today and the other guy I haven't seen and he just were just different times Yeah, you know I'll hear him. I got home yesterday at midnight I heard somebody come home at two in the morning. Oh, but I think it was the guy leaving today

So then I heard another guy there today at like 6 a.m And then he left but I heard somebody else in there. I don't know who that could be 13 people But I know there was one person in that front book bedroom and that's me are you sure in a bathroom? Yeah, yeah one shared bathroom. Yep. Again haven't even run into them. So Perfect timing every time. All right. That's a good fire fest. Wait, did you try to walk? Did you try to do the 45 minutes? No, I do plan on that. That's a weekend trip. I'm thinking I'm just going to make sure to

do it on a weekend day, make sure I kind of get the route, kind of get a feel for it. You're going to take a dry run on a weekend. Yeah, just take two hours back and forth. Well, Matthew, when you're here late, I'll take care of your Ubers, okay? So when you're here past dinnertime, we'll talk and I'll make sure that you can take an Uber home. Okay, that sounds good. Thank you very much. You don't need to take a bus at midnight. Yeah. Well, yeah.

Yeah. Is that what you did last night? No, memes drove me home last night. Oh, shut up memes. Yeah, that was fun. What was that conversation like? I mean- Was there one? Yeah, so yeah, it was fun. What was that conversation like I? mean Was there one yeah, there was about 46 40 to 70 words It was a quick drive. It was a you know we didn't have time to get into it. Yeah, but yeah great guy

What did mean say what do you lead off with you know just you know asking the simple questions? You know you know I was the day everything good, you know You know don't don't worry too much. Everything's gonna be alright, you know, just get a little stressed out It's a lot. So yeah, everyone's been awesome Yeah, just be like if you start to post online and you get a lot of traction and maybe you're really good with social media Just don't take any more rides from memes. He also has experience Because he will you take you out you're a coach yeah what what i forgot about this three years for what defensive coordinator middle school okay yeah we uh we went what was our four i think we

got like eight wins three seasons total yeah and you came at me for my coaching hey man i got 12 year olds on my hand, you got grown men. I got kids trying to live dreams. So what was the most complex defense you were running? Oh, I mean, very similar to Coach Doug's foreplace. Okay, alright. We had an Alabama and a Michigan and that was just blitz up the middle or blitz on the outside.

So just switch it up every now and again. And middle meant Michigan so you know middle you know and just keep it simple for these kids. Yeah. One kid I coached named was Marquise Johnson. He's a third string receiver right now at the University of Missouri. Whoa. Yeah literally knew him when he couldn't even tackle and now he's you know catching balls down the field Do you think he would recognize you? Yeah, I mean I haven't changed much. Yeah, I only lost six pounds Bounds that's big. I didn't gain it the single one. Yeah. All right. All right

Numbers let's see Matthew pick first go ahead 42 20 56 8 He's gonna get it 40 that was so was your number 99 pogue 56 Matthew 20 42 42 47 oh my god. I thought it was I thought that was it Meaning unbelievable. Love you guys I'll be coming for your love of good, good I'll be coming for your love of good, good Take me, take me, take me Take me on I'll be good After all, gee

Needless to say, I'm all, I need you I need you, I need you, I need you I want you, I want you, I need you But I can't stand it anymore The pain, the walk, is out there Say I'm weak It's the better to be safe inside It's the better to be safe inside It's the better to be safe inside Take me home

Take me home Take me home Take me on I'll be gone In a day or two Let me say that you're the last one Just to lay my life away You are the things I've got to remember

You shine away I'll be coming for you anyway Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me