Pardon My Take - Dan Patrick, Lions Beat The Chiefs, Week 1 Picks & Preview, Fantasy F-Bois And Fyre Fest Of The Week

Episode Date: September 8, 2023

Football is back and the Lions walked into Kansas City and beat the Chiefs. Kadarius Toney had a night he will hopefully forget and Matt Nagy may be a problem (00:00:00-00:17:49). Week 1 picks and preview for every game on Sunday plus Fantasy Fuccbois (00:17:49-01:13:55). We then welcome on our good friend Dan Patrick who wrote a new book and talk to him about the best year for his hair, retiring in 4 years, competition at ESPN and tons more (01:13:55-02:14:47). We finish with Jake's report on Obama's potential hook up (02:14:47-02:28:07) and fyre fest of the week (02:28:07-02:41:52).You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey part of my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen, add free on Amazon music. On today's part of my take, football is all the way back. We're going to talk Lions Chiefs, what a win for the Lions. We are going to preview every single game for week one, a preview every single game for week one fantasy fuck boys are back our picks and incredible interview with Dan Patrick. Good friend of the show caught up with him. He's got a new book out right now. Go buy it. Support our friends. We also have a very special presentation from Jake Marsh on Obama possibly being gay. So we're gonna cover everything and then we finish up with Fire Fest of the week.

But before we get to all of that, I wanted to quickly bring up my good friends at Paramount Plus, listen up, A.W.L.S. football season is almost here. It is here and Paramount Plus is once again, your home to stream the NFL on CBS all year long. Visit Paramount Plus dot com slash NFL right now to get an exclusive offer for pardon my take, fans, 50% off the annual price for a whole year paramount plus.

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Okay, let's go. And then a lot of stuff worked to be done No place to hang out or washing And then I can't live all on the sun Oh no, we're gonna rock it down too He let Shrek I brand new And then we'll take it higher Oh we're gonna rock it down too He let Shrek

It's part of my take, Here's in the harshness for us. Welcome to part of my take today is Friday, September 8th, and the Detroit Lions just went into Kansas City and one of football games. How about them Lions? How about them Lions?

How about Jared Goff for into the program. Jared to awesome tonight We're rooting hard for them all of us were all of us except for Hank Hank. We weren't I was rooting for Jared Oh, did you bet over a half an interception? I was rooting for Jared. I was rooting for Jared You're rooting for Jared. Uh, let's give a let's give a hand to Kiderius Tony He needs one. Yeah, he needs to what do, he needs two. What do you think the covers? What do you think the conversation is right now between Patrick or Holmes and Kiderius Tony?

Do you think he says like, do you just throw a box at him? I, I, I, I want to keep it at home. Because you know what's the law? He's like, I'm going to, you're going to, I'll get the game. When touch tag next weekend, buddy. I actually think the chiefs would have won that game

without Kiderius Tony. Yeah. He gave them an epic six He then dropped that ball at the end of the game Where it was just easily catchable he dropped that was a third down conversion when the guy ran across his face he was God awful and Listen cheese fans. You've had a lot of great years your team's gonna be fine

Your second and third best player didn't play in this game in Chris Jones and Travis Kelsey. Turns out Travis Kelsey very important and Chris Jones for that matter. This night though was about the Lions and the Lions like Dan Campbell coming into the game, nuts on the table going for it on fourth down on the 16, their own 16 yard line fake pun. I fucking

love the guy. Yeah, he doesn't change. And you should know this about Dan Campbell too. It's not like he hasn't done this before. If you're the chiefs, you should have probably been prepared for that fake pun because Dan Campbell absolutely loves to do in St. Shit early in the games and it worked out for him this time. The lines offense look pretty good in the first quarter until they snapped the ball into their own wide receivers. Dick. Yeah, that kind of hurt.

And then at that point, they didn't really do much for the next, I don't know, like two quarters on offense. Jameer Gibbs did look good on the outside. Montgomery looks good on the inside. Jameer Gibbs, I think it's a rookie saying. So outside on the bench, you mean? Jameer Gibbs? Yeah, no.

He wasn't in the game that much. But when he got that one thing is when he got the ball on? Yeah, he was in the game that much. But when he got that what I'm saying is when he got the ball on the outside, he's got those fresh rookie legs. He's got to work a little bit on the vision. He he treaded close to Trent. Was it Trent Richardson territory where there are a few gaps that he had that he just ran the opposite way. Yeah, yeah. So give the Baltimore Montgomery on the inside. Give the ball to Gibbs on the outside for right now. But yeah, Dan Campbell, Campbell well coach team. It was it was cool to see because obviously the Lions have been probably the most hyped team in the offseason the way They finished last year the fact that Dan Campbell is the man

And then to come in to Kansas City on banner night and back that up. It was fucking awesome I'm happy for this gotta be one of the best Lions victories in the last like 30 years Yes, huge This is massive for them and and now it felt like they were gonna they were gonna get into the territory where they get the moral victory And then they can build off that we almost beat the world champions But no you went into their you went into their house You ate their lunch and now you're going home and you're feeling good about yourself So I got one thing one thing that if you you're a cheese fan listening this right now,

again, I think you're going to be fine because you have Patrick from home. So he's Superman. And you are going to get Travis Kelsey back. Travis Kelsey apparently was like pleading to play. And they're like, no, we're trying to win a super what? Well, they should let him play. They should a lot of play. I think they were okay at the tight end positions.

Yeah, yeah, no, they were, but Travis Kelsey still is that guy who like will, you know, like these big, third down conversions, he just always there. Actually, I actually think that they obviously need more help on the outside. But he can play everywhere. If they had like one solid wide receiver and then the current tight ends that they had tonight, I think they might have won that game. Or just a race, Cadearius, tell them just, yeah, just if you just body out. Just take him away.

Yeah, maybe someone run routes, run his routes, but never get the ball. Yeah, you win that game. Just use them as a decoy, but I have one thing that the chief fans need to be worried about. I got one too. It's one name, his name's Matt Nagy. Okay, well, yeah, because that's kind of the same thing.

I was an after. Eric B. Enemy is no longer with the chiefs and chief fans, you saw Neggie in all his glory on that third and two when they got so cute and they did a direct snap. I believe to the tight end, maybe and kind of end around play where they took the ball out of Patrick Mahomes, the best football player in the world. They took the ball out of there. That guy's hands and got cute. And that was a neggy special. I don't know if it was neggy though,

because Andy Reed has been running those plays for years. No, Andy, the one knock that we have, the one knock that we have on Andy Reed, he gets too cute with it. They got cute in the red zone earlier. No, they got cute on an important play. He loves that play. But you're right, Big Cat. They don't have Eric B.

Enemy is Patrick Mah homes a system quarterback I was Eric B enemy the system do I now have the system have I like my system is the system belong to me now All your system belongs to us. No, I think it is But that that was a Matt Nagy play call and the idiocy of taking the ball out of Patrick's home's hands on a third and two is Mind blowing. Yeah, it is. Mind blowingly dumb. But you know that like we play, you know, Baxi driver, you know Monday morning quarterback, but that's just a simple fact of like,

I don't care what, like if that play even works, it's still a bad play call to be like, hey, we need a third down conversion and Patrick Holmes our quarterback and we're gonna not have him touch the ball. Patrick, my home's had a great night running the ball too tonight. Yeah, yeah. And so I think my new thing is just gonna be, I'm gonna ball. Patrick, my home's had a great night running the ball, too, tonight. Yeah, and so I think my new thing is just gonna be a...

So sneaky, I'm gonna be like, Patrick, my home's great scrambler, excellent runner of the ball, but he needs to learn how to stay in the pocket and be a true passer. Yeah, Piscop. Yeah, listen, I don't like this new age junk. Patrick, my home's obviously great athlete, but is he a good quarterback? I don't know. Yeah. It's a good question.

I'd like to seem developed. I don't think he's going to last long in the league if he doesn't learn how to pass the ball, but yeah. He's so sneaky running because he just always feels like he's about to slide, but he's never going to slide. And so everyone, it does feel like all the defenders no one wants to take a full hit on him. I also think that my homes has the fastest slide.

And he gets from running or doing his like duckwaddle that he does to being like full ass cheeks on the ground in like a quarter second. And he's also so smart with like, when he takes off, you know that he's seeing the field so well that there's a huge amount of space for him. He doesn't take, it's very rare to see him take off

and be like, oh, he got one yard. Like he's already, he's always looking down field and he's like, oh, now I have all this time. But again, the Lions, it was the Lions night. Credit to Aiden Hutchinson too. Yeah. That dude is a fucking monster and his family. I really hope that the NBC producers, the guys in the truck were smart enough to cut the Mike Dupfied on Mrs. Hutchinson when she went to the bathroom because you know that pervert Mike Toreco, he'd be listening to that. That's true. I hope they did that.

Hutchison had six pressures, six pressures on my homes, and my homes was two for six when he was being pressured by Hutchison. But also, Hutchison made the right tackle and the left tackle cheat tonight. That he was so good

that the Chief's Office Alignment were cheating on every single play. But it's still Lane Johnson, we just discussed last year. It was even worse. Move back. I know it was. I don't blame the chiefs players.

I blame the referee. So if you're if you're on the chiefs online and you're able to get two steps before the defensive player gets off the ball at all, then yeah, keep doing it. That was smart by them. Jeff Schwartz, do a video for us tomorrow. I think explaining this because I remember watching a video last year where it's like, everyone's like Lane Johnson is cheating. It's like, no, technically he's not.

I can't remember the details of it, but it did look when you're watching it, you're like, what the hell is going on? Well, the ref that they had, Terry McCollough. Yeah, his name, he even said, yeah, this is cheating, they're cheating. Yeah. Or I mean, it's not cheating if you don't call it, I guess.

Right, right. It was actually a well played game, not a ton of flags. Yeah. Like there was nice to see that. It was nice not to see just flag after flag after flag. And because September's football can be kind of sloppy. We didn't really have that. We had a, you know, what my homestead well, Kierri is Tony had an interception. And then the fumble for the Lions. So great game. Great game by Jack Fox too. I know you're listening right now Jack. Yeah great punting.

We sat back and we're just like, there's just no better feeling than watching the first game and being like, we have all the football in front of us. It was good. All big cats scared me because at halftime, big cat was like, I've got a, I've got a scary scary stat that I want to say to you. And I was like, don't say it, don't say it

because I thought big cat was going to do the thing that, I'm going to do now, but I'm going to use it as an example of to say to you. And I was like, don't say it. Don't say it because I thought Big Cat was going to do the thing that I'm going to do now, but I'm going to use it as an example of what not to do. Yeah, I don't do this until at least like October. When you're like, we actually are so much closer to the season being over. Yeah, yeah. So I don't do that shit. I don't do it till like we got it.

I thought Big Cat was going to come at me with that, but instead he dropped the most depressing stat of all time on me. Do you want to say it? Yeah. I don't know why this popped in my head. It just did. I was just thinking about the Super Bowl.

When you're watching the first game, you're like, Road to Super Bowl starts here. Get a little romantic about the whole thing. Football is like a guy's romance language. And I realized that this 2023-24 season is the last full season that PFT and I will watch in our 30s. So next that sucks. 2025 Super Bowl.

We will both be 40. Now the Marshall Sports main account posted this and it hurt me more than it hurt you because there was a lot of people who were like, big guess not 50. So that hurt. I think I need to do a little touch up on the old hair. I do have like half the population thinking that I'm 28 because I say it all. It's not a joke. Well, you kind of think that too. I know. Not anymore. I'm like, I'm 31 now. You know what though? We're going to fight. We fight, we have whatever it is, 16 months to figure out a way out of this. And by that, I mean kill ourselves. Yeah, that was gonna save us all the way out.

We could never get to four. When Big Cat said that to me, my resolution was, I'm gonna do all the drugs that the Super Bowl does here. Yeah, in Vegas. It's the last year that where you can think, okay, we're young. We're young. We're 30 year old mistakes.

Listen, we're young, we're just kids, we're just kids that make mistakes sometimes. We don't know any better. We're gonna be cool though. We're gonna be cool. We're gonna be like, yeah, like we're old heads now. We're gonna do like the little bra thing. All these young bucks try to podcast.

Yeah, we're here, we're here year 25. Are you out for one night, just as hard if not harder than all the young kids? And then you don't get up until like 5 p.m. the next day and then you're in bed for a week. But it would be a month. Yeah. It would be a month. I mean, Hank, Hank is right now battling his first true, like hangover in his 30s. And it's, it's a hard one. He's been hung over for three straight days. Can I give you a little word of advice, Hank? Yes.

So if you've got the tail end of the bachelor party hanging over, you feel not as bad on Monday. Sometimes you feel worse on Tuesday. You're gonna wanna drink four beers on Tuesday night. Well, it's Thursday night. I know, but I'm saying in that situation, if you have like a three day weekend, you come down off it, Tuesday, you don't feel that,

or I guess it was a three day weekend. So Tuesday, you might not have felt that bad. No, I did. Well, then drink four beers. The other four beers and you feel like you're golden again. I've only seen this happen once. I had a buddy do this one time and it was the most genius thing I've ever seen. We went to a bachelor party.

It was one of those like Thursday night to Sunday morning ones. We, I think it was in Charleston. He booked a hotel in Charleston on Sunday night, and he just like, as all of us went to the airport just in, in shambles, he just went to a hotel and just slept in like a cold hotel room for like 15 hours that went home.

It's great Monday. It's a good call, but also the four beers. Yeah, and the four beers. You're gonna make it. We're through, we're through. You are you? Yeah, it's the weekend Not really yeah, it's Friday no

Well, it's the weekend morning. No, it's the weekend. So Friday is the weekend Are you working that if I've learned one thing? That's past two weeks. It's that cows and bulls are the same species and The weekend. Yeah, stay tuned. All right. Well, yeah, and speaking of we should say we'll be at the max is running the 5k on Saturday morning. I'll be there mantra. Sarber plus five same go by the new apple crisp and pumpkin spiced Steltle and pop pumpkin spiced apple crisp the best. It is a tailgate, cold, big 10 morning dream. I will say this, the only other thing I'll say about the batch of party come down, hangover, is that the amount of, and I'm sure this happens, this, this happened to be my 20s too,

but after a long weekend, the amount of time you spend thinking about how you're not going to drink again. Yeah. For those first four days, it's spend thinking about how you're not gonna drink again. Yeah. For those first four days, it's like, I'm never doing this to myself again. And then you eventually get to an age where you just don't drink again.

Yeah, yeah. I might be there. I was having those thoughts. I was having those like, We put on chew, aren't you going watch Big New Brass games? Yeah, that's for work though. That's where I was like having those thoughts is like, I can't do this Saturday.

I can't do this Saturday, but content work. It's got to be toned. You don't have to work though. That's where I was like having those sounds is like I can't do this Saturday. I can't do this Saturday, but content work. It's got to be done. You don't have to drink though. Oh no, come on, he's got a drink. You don't have to. Some people are capable of doing that, like being in a drinking atmosphere, not drinking, I am not one of those people.

I cannot drink, but I have to remove myself from the equation. If I'm in a bar, I won't drink liquor. I think that's the plan, just no liquor. Yeah, you've got to just be like, no shots. Yeah, that's the rule. Of course, let's. No shots, no vodka drinks, no whiskey drinks. You're gonna drink so much liquor.

No vodka drinks. Of course, let's. Course, let's. You get knocked out. But you get back up again. Yeah, that's the Hank Lockwood story. Yeah. Yeah. I do have a prediction for Cedarius Tony, and I have the seasons going to play out because

I thought about it. Yeah. Gulag, a grocery bagger. What's going to happen is he's going to have another bad performance in one of the next two weeks. If he doesn't have an injury by then, he's going to get mad at my homes for not throwing him a ball anymore. And then by week nine, he's going to get disciplined by the team for yelling at my homes during practice to throw him the ball more.

He's going to come back, get more angry at my homes for not throwing the ball. Probably take off his shoe, do something insane, try to stab him with a tockleet. And then he's going to get traded, cut, remove from the team. That's that's right. Rader. That's how the season plays out for Cudaria Sony. I know how his brain works. Yeah, yeah, it was not a good night for Cudaria Sony,

but a great night for the Lions. Let's kick it to ourselves. We're gonna do a preview of every single game on Sunday and fantasy fuck boys and Dan Patrick. All right, it's time for NFL weekend picks and preview for week one. It's brought to you by our friends at Uber Eats. We love Uber Eats apart in my take. And we know that you're listening to this right now.

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so in other words, get almost anything with Uber Eats. Order now. You're sitting on your couch. Uber Eats is sending you order Uber Eats right now. Get almost anything order right now all weekend long. And that is who is presenting sponsor for our NFL picks and preview week one boys. We made it. We made it. So what we're going to do this year. We already tease this last year got a little confusing when we go game by game and be like, who's got to pick on this game? We're going to talk about every game and at the end, we're all going to give our two best

bets, a total and a side. And that will be the competition. So it'll be the best running competition throughout the year, two best bets a week, no overlap picks. We'll draft the picks. But this way, we're going to talk about every game and then you get a little bit of gambling at the end. I think what we should do, I was thinking about how to strategically start it.

I think what I've done is, I've separated the early slate and how we preview this for our TV games and our non TV games. We have six TVs in the office, so I think we'll have five TVs on games and red zone, and there'll be a few off. We're going to start with our TV games, okay? And the first TV game I had was Bengals Proud. Yep, that's going to be a sneaky good matchup. It's one of these games where you look at the logos and if you've been watching football as long as we have, there's still something shocking about seeing these two logos next to each other and thinking this is our one one TV game of the week. Yes. But the Bengals are good. The

ground really good. The ground should be good. We don't know what's going to happen to Sean Watts in this season. I'm pumped. I'm pumped for this game. The battle for Ohio. I'm very pumped for this game. The one thing that I have sticking in my head. I am trying my best going into week one to think about the long term and the short term here where it's like long term. I think the Bengals are a definite Super Bowl contender. I would almost like pencil them into at least the second round AFC championship game. I think they are that good. Short term. Joe Burrow misses half of training camp again.

What happened last year? He missed it for his appendectomy. He threw four picks against the Steelers, lost an overtime to a Steelers team that was not that good last year. They were kind of middle of the road, especially at the beginning of the season. I feel like he's going to be rusty again. I think the Bengals would be there long term, but I think I think this is a tough spot for the Bengals week one with Joe Borough coming back from not practicing at all. Well, the exception for that, the stat of the Browns being dominant over the Bengals was that one game last year. Yeah. But recently the Browns have been better head to head. I think they're five and one against five and one against burrow. And, uh, yeah, the Browns are run the damn ball. Let's start this. Let's start the season off on a good

foot. Stifansky run the damn ball. I don't get cute with it. I know you don't have chunt anymore. You just got chub. So they're missing hunt, but just give the fucking ball to Nick Chubb and let him just run. I also, now this is follow me along because this might get a little weird, but to Sean Watson, everything off the field, I think he's the perfect quarterback for the Browns and here's why the Browns are very good. The Browns have a very good roster to Sean Watson when he's when he was playing for Texans was a phenomenal top five quarterback in the league, right?

But a lot of people don't want to talk about the Browns because to Shawn Watson So it tempers the Browns hype and the Browns are one of those teams I put in the category of like never over hype the Browns or the Lions some of these teams He might be the perfect quarterback where it's like they are really really good at to Shawn Watson plays well They're going to be phenomenal, but we're not going to hype them too much because then we have to talk about Dishon Watson. Well, you know who is talking about Dishon Watson,

who is an advocate for Dishon Watson. Maybe his biggest fan this year, actually. Who? Hank Lockwood. Hank Lockwood. Who are left? Hank drafted Dishon Watson, which I thought was a disgusting act. I disavow personally.

I do too. I disavowed Dishon, but Hank strongly vows him. I mean, the NFL, I do too. I disavowed to Sean, but Hank strongly vows him. I mean, the NFL, the NFL wants to suspend them. They should. Oh, so now you, now you're standing behind. I'm saying like the, I'm not, if he's on the field, I'm rooting for him. Is there, is there a to Sean for like there was a Brady for that would be a wild group? Danny Masterson be a wild group. Yeah. I think he's not a great year. I think people are people are, you know,

hating on him because he was suspended for a lot of the year. Last year came back was rusty, but he's one of the best QBs in the league when he's good. He's had a full off season of training, full training camp. I think it'd be funnier if he just was bad for the rest of his career. So, but I do think he probably will, I mean, he can't be as bad as he was last year. No, but I mean, taking like a year and a half off football, you're not going to be the same when you just get tossed back in.

Yeah. So, he's had an off-season to prepare. He probably should be better this year. How good does he have to be, though? How good does Sean have to be to make the contract that he's getting worth it? I feel like he has to win two Super Bowls for that contract to be justified.

Yeah, I think he has to be like a top four quarterback in the AFC, which is, you'd be like, oh, that's not, that's really hard to do. Yeah. When you list the names. He has the best, the best contract in the history of the NFL for a quarterback. Yeah.

So this game is gonna be great though. I'm very, very excited. All right, game number two on the television 49er Steelers. 49er Steelers gonna be on the TV. Boses back. Bosa is back. I still though, this is such a classic Steelers spot that I think it's like 15, 3 and 1 or something.

Mike Tomlin as a home underdog. And I know that they look great in preseason, they've getting a little buzz. But yeah, I just like Mike Tomlin knows how to get the guys going. Yeah, the 49ers are legit though. The most, the most super bowl. I have more confidence in picking the 49ers to make a championship game

than I do of any other team in either conference. The AFC because they'll beat each other up. The NFC, you've got the Eagles, but I was seeing an interesting set. The Eagles and we are the Super Bowl losers in weeks one and two of the following season. They stink across the board. They might get off to a slow start, but I feel like the 49ers, you can just pencil them in.

I'm pumped for this game too. It's going to be great defensive football. Now I would like to see the Steelers figure out something to do in offense besides like hit Fryer, Mooth and the flat, hit Naji and the flat. They don't know Washington now. and offense besides like hit friar, move in the flat, hit nausea in the flat. They don't know Washington now. Yeah, throw one ball to pickens each game that makes you be like, holy shit, this guy's an alien.

Maybe I have to answer Johnson Square, a touchdown, one touchdown. I would like to see something new out of the, out of the Steelers offense. I just don't know if we're gonna get it. I, I'm ready to say it. I think this is a legacy year for Kyle Shanahan. Okay.

I think he has to win the Super Bowl. Or else, or else, the legacy. Tarnish. His pristine championship pedigree has been tarnished. Yeah, no, I do think though, if he wins the Super Bowl, he will be the hottest. He'll be the number one coach in the NFL. Like, you know how that quickly that happens?

Sean McVeigh wins Super Bowl number one coach. He has his legacy, like this is a legacy defining season for him. I saw our healthy QB though. He needs a healthy QB. Can he say that? Can he say that? Can he say that?

Can he say that? I mean, he is considered one of the best coaches. I think he's a phenomenal coach. Everything is on this team. They've paid everyone. Like they can't pay everyone what they're paying them forever. Everyone's gotten a new contract, hasn't it? Like Debo Kittle, Bo said, just got a contract.

He got a Warner. So you get paid yet? I think he got a contract. So like they basically have to do it with Brock Pertie because they're paying everyone else, which is a good strategy if Brock Pertie could be good. If Pertie looks bad, I'm gonna start the bring in Philip Rivers' movement.

Yeah. What's changed in the last six months? What did Philip Rivers have six months ago? That he doesn't have now, that you would consider bringing him in on the steam. I know that kid. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Party struggles.

And I am officially a believer in Party. He convinced me after like three starts last year. He had that one through across the middle. I was like, okay, this guy can play. But if he's not healthy, I think Shanna Hand owes it to us as football fans to bring in Philip River. I also should say, I'm officially a believer in party on the 49ers.

Oh yeah, yeah. If you put party on the cardinals, it would be a disaster. But yeah, on the 49ers, did you also see Mika Fitzpatrick tone setter? He put ropes around the Steelers locker room and around the logo in the locker room. Don't touch it. No more stepping on it. It's the Tone's setter. He put ropes around the Steelers locker room and around the logo in the locker room. Don't touch it. No more stepping on it.

It's the little things. He said something as small as keeping our logo clean. It's simple, but it means a lot. Yeah, don't touch it. That's a hockey thing, right? It is a hockey thing, but I like it. Tone's setter. Can I throw in one thing at the end of each game?

I have one nugget prepared for it. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, give us your nuggets. So I have a new segment called Nerd Nuggets. Okay. Just reading it off on social media. I'll throw it on the show too. If people and if you guys don't like it, no offense. Like, I won't be offended. For this, you'll be a little bit offended. You're already apologizing. Okay. A weird scheduling quirk. The Steelers are opening the season at home for the first time since 2014 over the last eight years, Pittsburgh went five,

two and one on the road and week one. Oh, that is weird. So this is the first home week one game in nine years? Yeah. That is, that's a nerdog. Is there a reason for that? I think it's just a lot. I don't know.

I know that they like to have like rib fest sometime in early September. Maybe it was like, you know, the spurs go on the road every year for the rodeo trip. Maybe it was like the rib trip we couldn't have them in week one. Yeah, I don't know. But it's a rare match. Steelers at home when you're one.

Yeah. Okay, game number three on the TVs. This is a, this is we have to do is buy a spectacular cardinals. Yep. Commanders cardinals will be on the TV. Okay. Why are you saying they won't?

It's a start of an era. It's the start of an era. PFT, sell us on this game being on TV. Okay, why are you saying they won't? It's the start of an era. PFT, sell us on this game being on TV. Okay, I've got a great nerd nugget of my own. It's fucking half price hotdog day in Rouseon, Maryland. It's a new era. Full price ad. They took out a full page ad in the Washington Post to announce that we're doing half priced hot dogs at the game. Dance Snyder could could never do that he would charge double and they'd be expired and they'd probably already been stuck up his butt so it's a new new system in DC across the board I'm excited to watch Sam how the Washington Post also did a

very interesting article about Sam how and how Mac Brown knew that he was going to be a guy in college because he never went on dates it was even on Valentine's day he would be like Mac would go up to him and say, Hey, who's your date? He'd be like, my only date tonight is with Madden. Wow. He was learning to playbook. So he's married to the game.

That's married to the game of football. That also very much could be Mac Brown being so old and out of touch that he didn't realize it's him. How has like a hot sorority girlfriend named Madden? That's also true. Like that is a hot sorority girlfriend name. It is, yeah. Like a bad girl. Yeah. A bad, bad girlfriend named Maddie. That's all such a true. Like that is a hot sorority girlfriend name. It is, yeah. Like a bad girl.

Yeah. A bad bad bad guy. Maddie? Yeah, I feel like that would be so great if Mac Brown just didn't understand that situation whatsoever. Yeah, but I choose to believe that he, some of us miss football, he misses football

because he's married to the game. And I think that Sam Howe is giving us every reason to think that he could be a good quarterback this year. Now, he might suck ass, all right? And I've prepared myself for that mentally, but I don't think he's gonna suck enough ass to not beat the Cardinals by seven points because I have zero confidence in the Arizona Cardinals.

No, they're gonna suck it. I have full on clip every weird thing Jonathan Gannon does mode where I'm just gonna be watching him like a hawk You gonna drive who drove here? Who rode the bus? Well, you got a light you got a light of fire in yourself. You want killers. Come on men, we're gonna kill we're gonna kill we're gonna take a bus here.

I'm going to mix up his name with Steikin all the time. Can you put that clip in because it is that confusing what you. Yeah. It was almost verbatim what he did. I have no idea what he's trying to do there. I don't know if he's been installed to tank. And in fact, we're so dumb and we've been so wrong about the NFL so frequently on the show that now I'm starting to double doubt myself and say, wait, we might be wrong about him. He might be a good coach.

Yeah. They might be putting this out. This might be seven dimensional chest that they're playing. I feel pretty confident saying no. I tend to agree with that. And he's not releasing who the starter is gonna be because you have to prepare for competitive edge Josh Dobs and then somebody else not caught McCoy. You have to prepare for either Josh dobs or not Josh dobs Mm-hmm if you're the commanders and if you're the Cardinals you have to prepare for either Terry McClure or not Terry McClure I think he's gonna play and I think chase yonks is gonna play too. So I love the commander.

Josh tobs or not Josh tobs is actually like a straight up 50-50 split. I don't know which one I want. I think I would rather prepare for Josh tobs. But not Josh tobs could literally be anyone. If it's not Josh tobs, then you're probably not gonna get seven interceptions. Well, what if it's an eight to a pit of men? Then you could, yeah. But I know that. Well, we don't know who's under not Josh Dobbs and you're probably not going to get seven interceptions. Well, what if it's an agent Peter?

Then you could, yeah. But I know that we don't know who's under not Josh. Josh, you either want Josh Dobbs or there's infinity other people that it could be that aren't Josh Dobbs. Yes. All right, what's your nerd nugget? The commanders of one eight straight at home against the Cardinals dating back to 1999.

It's Washington's longest active home winning streak against any opponent. All right, there we go. against any opponent. All right. Wow. There we go. I'm sold. All right. So it is, let's see, roster overview, Arizona card rolls, Josh Dobbs or wait, where is it? Dept.

Do we know? Do you know? It's definitely not cool. The cut cool, which to me tells me that they are tanking because if you want to win one game, you have Colt McCoy in the roster. Clayton Tune. Oh, okay. Actually liked in college a lot.

Clayton Tune, play for our guy Dana at Houston, not a bad. I think I want Josh Jobs now. As far as people who aren't Josh Jobs goes, I would rather have like, I think I would rather take Clayton Tune than 50% of people that aren't Josh Dobbs. Yes. Yes. All right. Next TV game, Box Vikings.

Baker Mayfield. Yeah. After the first two, it gets a little... Don't get me wrong. I wasn't, I wasn't, I was an Ewing football. I was just, in the box. Well, yeah. We, the box, we will have Steven Chey on the

stream. But yeah, the box Vikings will see what the Vikings new defense looks like. Baker, just trying to make something happen is Mike Evans hurt or just wants to be treated. I think Mike have his his career is hurt. Okay, because that's the craziest part is like Baker Mayfield probably has his best weapons ever. Right? Yeah, pretty good. I mean Mike Evans is a Hall of Famer. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, feel like he just wants to be traded though. He's like, hey, I'm at this point in my career. We're not going to be a contender this year. Just please move me to a different team.

Yes, yes. Okay. I would say he's earned that right. Yeah, for my Kevin's. Nugget. Vikings finished 11-0, one score games last year. Just five and eight in 2021. Yeah, he feels like a progression of the mean.

Also, that might not be a contender, but they're in the NFC South True, that's a good point that that division definitely you could win it with probably nine eight or nine games So the good news for Kirk cousins is I don't think it's gonna be a one-score game I feel like this is this is prime Kirk cousins opening day against an inferior team It's buried in the in the one o'clock noon o'clock slate. So he's not gonna be standing out This is a good Kirk cousins game. Yeah, all right in the in the one o'clock, noon o'clock slate. So he's not going to be standing out. This is a good Kurt Cousins game. Yeah.

All right. And then the last TV game, number five, I'll let you guys pick one or two. Two. Okay. Let's do one. I said two. Which one would you like?

Let's do two. Jay, Jay, break the tie. One and one. One or two. Number two. One, two. All right. You just got Ryan Tann Hill, versus Derek Carr.

Tighten Saints. The other one was Jags Colts. Yeah. No, it's kind of a toss up. You know, Jags Colts head is right. All right. So we'll go. We're going to Trevor Lawrence and the Richardson. That's a that's a QB match. Okay. So Jags Colts and we have we have our winners, right? Did we announce our winners to the Colts tickets? Yeah. And Colin. Congratulations. Congratulations. Colin, the baby Ursa pictures were everything that we had hoped for and more. So you will be going to the game this weekend. We'll have to figure out something different to do next week, because I feel like baby ursa is a one-time thing.

Yeah, well, yeah, we'll just keep doing babies. Yeah. I think we'll show us your, well, that gets a little creepy. They're not home again. So we have some time. You're asking Indianapolis people to send us their children? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. This game, Jack's Colt, I agree. Now I'll say this right now, Dennis Allen, who is an AWL, longtime listener. If you decide to start James Winston, you will get on the TV. Absolutely. That's a fact. Yeah, we'll smash the James, we'll break that glass in case of emergency. What's the stat in this one, Jake?

Do you have the nerd nugget that says that the Colts haven't, they haven't won in week one and how many 13, which I've been reminding you guys all summer, which you are ignoring. Right? Well, you know, I'm paying attention to everything. Well, you told me to, we have a, then you told it back to us. Yeah. That and they're having a different week one starting quarterback for the eighth straight year, the Colts.

That's pretty impressive. Andrew Luck, Scott Tozine, Andrewuck again, Jacobi Bersett, Philip Rivers, Carson Wentz, Matt Ryan, Anthony Richardson. Wow. That's a very, they're very depressing list. One in 13, one, 13 and one against the spread since 2008. Week ones. Anthony Richardson now. Anthony Rich, your husband, trophy winner. Good point, Hank, but counterpoint. We're good year. Jaguar's minimum 13 wins. Per people. That's their. If they don't have to be all man, if they don't win this one, he's going to be tough to find a way to

13 wins. If you, if you lose week one to the Colts, yeah, Trevor Lawrence is foreign 14 straight up in 7, 11 against spread on the road. Hmm. Hmm. Okay, I know this sounds stupid about Trevor Lawrence, but I believe in these things. I think the demise of Davo definitely affects Trevor Lawrence. It's like, though, it's like college rankings like your diploma goes down. If Davo starts to go into the dumpster, Trevor Lawrence now, it's like, well, what do he ever do?

But counterpoint doesn't make Trevor Lawrence look better. He overcame him. He was able to drag that big swing into that. Yeah. Okay. So that sounds like we're going to play the results. We'll have to wait. Yeah.

So post-weep one. We're right. We'll figure out which one of us was right because somebody on this show is. Well, no, we're both right because we're both believing in both at the same time. Yep. And whenever the results come out, we'll sign.

Yeah. It's called playing a lot. It's called playing a lot., it's called play side. That way I always come out on top. Yeah, it's it's it's pre determining storylines. And then we fit in the pieces at the end. I keep expecting Trevor Lawrence just wow me and come out week one with slightly shorter hair. And then I then I could fully believe in him. Then I could be like this dude can win a Super Bowl. Yeah, but no, you won't. You won't.

All right, other games, Panthers Falcons. This game is going to probably stink, although I'm high on the Falcons. We didn't even mention that Arthur Smith created the Joker position for Quarter L. Patterson. Yeah. That ruled. Arthur Smith felt a little testy there at the press conference. I like that. I want a little fire from him. Did you see what the new wrinkle that the Falcons are gonna be unveiling and Mercedes-Benz Superdomas? No. They've got a security guard, but it's a dog.

It's a robotic security guard dog named Benzie. Like the Boston Dynamics. It's like the Boston Dynamics dog. It's gonna be patrolling the sidelines. I think they need to resign Michael Victor, take care of this thing because this thing is freaking me out. I, nobody wants the weird robot security dogs, Bezos and Boston Dynamics, pushing those weird fucking dogs on us for years.

Yes. We don't want it. We don't want those dogs. No, thank you. But anyways, that's my fun. That's my man, my man meat is close to Jake's nerd nugget. Like, yeah, I think the focus is going to win this game. Oh, I, the last thing I had was, did you guys see it was a very niche fantasy argument

that I just gave me a little chuckle and athletic writer. Did a big breakdown of the Falcons roster and he said that Kyle Pits is going to be fourth in targets this year. And everyone's like, what the fuck fourth? How are you fourth in targets? And then he was like, well, I met targets plus carries, which is a completely different thing. So does he also include like, I guess, B. John Robinson. Yeah, no, he had Tyler Algier as like third and Kyle

pits his fourth. And it was like, how the hell is this guy going to get more targets than Kyle pits? He's like, well, I was talking about carries. He meant touches. Yes. Yes. He has his on the ball opportunities. I'm very interested to see what Arthur Smith does with Bijan Robinson. If you get a new toy at running back, he drafted him very high. Are you just going to give him the ball 30 times in the first game?

Why not? I would. Why not? Let's ride. All right, Titans. I do have a fun stat for this game. Yeah. Number one overall quarterbacks and their debuts

are O 13 and one straight up. One and 13 against the spread. Now, don't look any further into that than thinking like, okay, maybe the team that drafts in the first overall position isn't very good. We're just talking, this is a complete judgment on Bryce Young as an individual here. So according to history, O 13 and one straight up. Just keep that in mind. That's tough.

That's tough. All the Bryce's members out there. So I'm doing a law. I'm holding my Bryce's stock. It's a long play. You're going to see who comes out on top. It's not going to be great this year. I'll say that right now, but it's a long play.

Okay. Yeah. Frank Reich's 10 year as Panthers had coach begins in a familiar place. He started as the opening day quarterback in the Panthers in Oggerl season 95 against the Falcons. Oh, wow. Interesting. Okay. That's very interesting.

Yeah. All right. Titan Saints. This is this has the chances of being the most boring game with two teams that could go to the playoffs. Because I feel like this is going to be defense, new, you know, Derrick Hard, new offense, maybe slow start. Uh, and I feel like the Titans are going to win like 20 to 17. I'm kind of believing in the Saints. I'm kind of believing in the Titans.

Because here's the thing. Derrick Hard, not a bad quarterback. James is better. Not a great quarterback. James is definitely better, but Derrick Hard, not a bad quarterback. Um, their defense was really good last year. I guess, I guess I should say that if Derek Card beat out James in the depth chart, then Derek Card is a hall famer. Yeah, he should be first ballot because James is a hall famer. They are going to be missing Alvin Camaro who's suspended for what three weeks, four weeks. Is that the punching incident from like five years ago where you beat up a guy in Las Vegas, which you should be allowed to do. There's no rules in Las Vegas. So he's out. So I don't know how the running game is going to look.

But I still feel like Derek Carr probably and upgraded the quarterback position. Yeah. Yeah. Who is it last year? Andy Dalton. Andy Dalton. Yeah. Andrew Dalton. Yes.

And Ian Book in that one game. That was the worst game ever played. And Blake Bordelos was on the roster. Blake Bortles is on the roster. Um, okay. And then last game in the new slate Texas Texans Ravens. So Ravens are going to demolish the Texas. I probably agree with that and I am strad. Oh, is it going to be in the hole? No, no, no, no, no, but this is the, this is probably the biggest survivor pick that if they lose, it'll, it'll be in the home? No, they're not, they're not, they're not. But this is probably the biggest survivor pick that if they lose, it'll be the classic. 90% of people's survivor pools are busted.

Agreed, agreed. And that always happens. Last I checked, it was 30% of America is taking the Ravens and survivor pools. 20% is taking the commanders, which is wild to think. Yeah. But was that, was that my beard then? That might be it then.

That might be it then. What, what you piece of shit. One of those two is winning. You're gonna take, the commanders are the, the, the, the, carnal's the text. You're gonna take the finals. I know it. I just know you are.

Yeah, I just do it. But this is a new look Ravens. They got, they got wide receivers for the first time. That's gonna look very unusual to see the Ravens throwing the ball down field. Yes. So I think Lamar's gonna have an awesome year. Yeah, I'm a Lamar this year. All right. Afternoon games Packers bears. I've said this on many platforms, but I do it's a slightly hyperbolic, but I do think that this might be the biggest game in Bears franchise history. And I know what you want yourself up then. Yeah, right. It's good that I'm not putting too much weight into this game, but yeah, it feels so

significant because it is the Packers because it's Jordan loves first, you know, real season, Justin Fields, big season, hopefully coming up. It just, there's been a lot of shit talk, a lot of people talking about Justin Field sucking. I'm so excited to see this Bears offense. Who are these people that thinks that Justin Field sucks? A lot of people do. I mean, a lot of he's, he's very good. I know, but a lot of people, he's very good. It's, if you, there's a lot of people who think he's trash. Well, I would disagree with that. I would disagree a lot. I think the Bears are going to win this game, but get. But I did go back and I watched some of the all 22 on Jordan Love.

And I saw that one pass that he threw the one like 70 yards. Yeah. He's rolling out to his left. There's one pass. That was a good pass. It was a really good pass. It's just going to be a really sad day. But this, you know what? This is why the AW us are you W. I know what they're rooting for the rooting for like I will be as sad as sad could be for a week one loss because like week one you shouldn't shouldn't get that down. I will be as down as I could be. It's Christian wood playing. I don't know. He's got a hammy, but I think he was just limited in practice. Either way, the bear's in Christian Watson. Christian watching. You're not gonna like this one. God. Oh, God. Christian Watson did not practice again today. Okay. Good. He, Christian Watson. Christian Watson. You're not going to like this one. Go ahead.

Oh, God. Oh, God. Christian Watson did not practice again today. Okay. Good. He's a problem. So Jordan love, obviously, the only third, the only the third quarterback to start a season over for for for for for Green Bay since 1993.

You can't clean the subject. Jordan love will become the only the third quarterback to start a season opener for Green Bay since 1993. Both Enrod Rogers and Brett Farve were winners in their first week one starts. You know what, fuck, fuck teams like the Patriots, no disrespect tank and the Packers that have gotten to enjoy. And for a while, the Colts who get to enjoy just decades of consistency at quarterback.

This has been my argument about anyone out there who a bears fan who's wavering at all on Justin Fields, Jordan love this whole dynamic. Just go all in, blind faith, go all in with Justin Fields and go all in saying that Jordan love is going to suck. What's the worst thing that could happen? It could be wrong. We just go right back to where we've been for the last 25 years, where the Packers have a hall of Fame quarterback

and the Bears are searching for them. If it's not as catastrophic of a situation if you've lived through it. Like I know where, like if I have to go back to this place, it'll be like going back to an old apartment being like, oh yeah, I know where the, you know, like, I know that this floor board's a little weird. I know like, you know, the toilet is a little,

you gotta hit it twice. Like, I know the place that I could end up in. So why not just believe that it's gonna be different this time? Yeah, you should. Right. You should face. You absolutely should. It's okay to love, okay?

It's okay to go. Well, no. Oh yeah, it's okay to field. It's okay to field. It's okay to field the motion. Field your field, your fieldings. Yes. And just lean into it. This is a rare feel the motion. Yes, your fieldings. Yes.

And just lean into it. This is a rare chance that you have for your Paris fan. There's no chance that he sucks. He's not a sucky quarterback. You're in love? No, no. Oh, okay, right. He's not bad.

He's really good. He did things that I've never seen a quarterback do last year. I think he's going to be better. He's going to have a better career than Trevor Lawrence. I'm going to stand by that commitment. Let's go. I said it just, I said it for my balls one time last year, not for my brain.

Feel it. But sometimes I'm fielding my fieldings right now and it's coming for my balls. So someone say by the end of the season, Justin Fields will be the second best quarterback at the NFC. That's a good take to have because there's not a ton of quarterback in NFC, but it feels good to say. Yeah.

Okay, Raider's Broncos. I actually think the Broncos, here's my theory. I don't think the Broncos are gonna be very good overall. I think this game, they're gonna be very good because Sean Peyton is going to call the best game of his life. And then when Russell Wilson eventually regresses, he can be like, look, you saw what I was able to do

for a couple of weeks here. So it's not my fault. I actually think that the Raiders are going to be a historically bad team this year. Yeah. I think all the signs are pointing to the Raiders just completely imploding on themselves. And I'm going to really enjoy watching that. The curse of cutting will Compton. That's what I said. Yeah, I like that. I like that a lot. Max Crosby is a Broncos killer.

11 and a half sacks over his last seven games against Denver. Wow. Wow. Okay. J. Can you who else was a Broncos killer? Oh, J. I think the weather's going to be in like the mid 80s, which doesn't really meet my usual formula, but it's like statistically a very profitable thing to back the Broncos in September at home.

Yeah, because it's hot and the altitude, it's very hard for teams to adjust to that. So just throw that out there. Yeah. I also like inter-divisional matchups in week one. I love it. I love it. You get off to a hot start.

I love it. Also, we should mention Carl Nassib retired. Yes. Shout out. Thanks for coming out, Carl Nassib. Yes. I have a fun fact about Carl Nassib. Yeah, give it to us. Penn State. Penn State. Also, his his dad was my dad's roommate in college. Wow. Whoa. Yeah. I knew. And his brother Ryan Nassib, his brother played with my brother in the circus. kiss. Does the sneaking out in the middle of the night and waking up in your roommates bed thing? Does that run the family? I don't know how that relates.

What does Carl Nassib being gay running the family? In his family? Yeah. I don't think so. Okay. It's fine if it does. Yeah. We're a sex positive podcast.

We always have been. Love his love. We have a presentation in the later. Yeah, it feels just feels. Yeah, feels it does. Yeah, we're a sex positive podcast. We always have been. Love his love. We have a presentation on the later. Yeah, it feels just feels. Yeah, feels just feels. Yeah. All right, Dolphins Chargers. Fun matchup.

Yeah, very fun. Fun uniform matchup. It's just this matchup to me screams points. It's points and it's also, if you remember last year, the moment that the Dolphin season started to really crater was that Dolphin's Chargers game when it felt like the Chargers had figured out how to stop Mike Martinez offense and they like, you know, we're jamming with the line and not letting them have explosive plays.

It also had members. Was that the game that Tyree Kale picked up the ball and ran for a touchdown? That was awesome. Yeah, because I think I had the over in that game and I was like, oh, we're back and it ended like 1710. Irique is gonna look so fast against the C words. The C words are actually healthy right now as we say every year in week one.

They're finally healthy. They're a healthy team. I don't want to curse them, but I kind of believe in them in the first four games of the season. Because that's usually you can set your watch to it. That's when they usually have their first debilitating injury of the year to an impact player.

They're healthy right now. I think I'm going to, I lasted exactly zero games of the C words and not betting on them. I'm going to bet on the C words this week. I, I think this is a, do you have any pride game for Mike and Daniel? What's that? That's my, she's in the eavesdropping bitch.

I mean, he's got, he's got, he's got eight months to figure out this charger's defense that kind of put him in a body bag last year. Yeah. So I think the Dolphins are going to come out explosives. Pew, pew, pew shots. Hot seat brand salient. Yeah. Officially on the hot seat before the season even starts. Because he's doing those weird yoga things. Yeah. Nice guy. We really actually enjoyed brand salient on the show. We should have him back on. Actually, we should have him back on. He should come back on so that if the hot seat gets hot, you know that will be too big a pussy to actually put them on the hot seat. Correct. So

we do the right move, Brandon Saley. Come back on the show. That just goes for any coach. If you think you're about to lose your job, just come on the show and we will be cowards about it for at least a month. Like they know how it got way too much. We were too nice. I mean, who's the one coach that we put on the hot seat more than any other coach in the NFL right now on this show? Bill Bellicic. We'll talk about.

I was saying Calapari. Calapari. Yeah, but also Bill Bellicic. He's never been on the show. Yeah, so he's going to come on the show. Ram C-Hawks, I actually think the Rams are going to be really, really bad. Yeah. And he's never been on the show. Yeah. So you gotta come on the show. Ram C Hawks. I actually think the Rams are going to be really, really bad. Okay. Yeah. I think they're in like a weird, almost tanking, but not tanking situation. Cooper Cup, obviously out Matthew Stafford. I feel like I don't know. I don't know what to

expect. We don't know what we're going to get. We've been weird. Um, that's in bedtime, maybe. Yeah. They're resetting the whole deck. Like the salary cap. They didn resetting the whole deck like the salary cap. They didn't go out and make like the crazy. I actually think and quote me if I'm wrong, I believe that next year come late April, the Los Angeles Rams will be selecting in the first round. That's incredible. Insane. Fuck them. Picks. Insane. So the first time they've had a first round pick, maybe a little, you know, tank a roux top five pick. So if they're trying to take a quarter bad, I would imagine

that they would not have Matt Stafford play this season. Yeah. Why he's going to start. He's going to start. But who knows, will he finish? If things look bad, they might take him out. Also, do you know that guy Dove Kleinman, you the robot, the robot. Did you know that guy Dove Kleinman? You're the robot? The robot. Did you know that he reported inaccurately that Kelly, that Kelly Stafford's wife had cancer again? That's pretty fucked up. And then he deleted it and acted like it didn't happen. That's really fucked up. Yeah.

Mike Floreau, you're off the hook for Kill and Terry Bradshaw. I completely forgot about that. Yikes. That you can't delete that. You have to edit that. Yes. And you can't just be like whoops Yeah, no, no, no, you see here. You just edit it and don't talk to JK

Yeah, but does not psych does not just reply to your tweet with psych All right last afternoon game. It's a big one Eagles Patriots. I can't believe we get max first Hank week one what a treat Corn, Kevl corn Get your kettle corn ready. Yeah. As everyone says, uh, first, let's address the billbell check rumors. Bromers, you like to say, uh, the daily mail reported that, uh, billbell check and his longtime girlfriend have broken up, and uses mail. Uh, and it has, it has, it has,

And it has it has Pat's executives are on edge. The report says there's a concern about what Linda might post about online after the breakup Report also says it's been a drawn out back and forth breakup kind of feels dirty to be doing this reporting Here's a question. Who's ever been in a breakup and hasn't been a little worried about what gets posted That's true good point good point Hank And I probably a lot of people. And Bill Belchuk doesn't use social media so he can't fire back. And he's about to start the season. So he, like, she's probably mad.

She could probably. She's probably a jet's operative. Yeah, like she, she's got all the ammo because she's the one that's on social media. She's got a good following. And he's just focused on the season. What would be the funniest? That's what they're concerned.

Okay, what would be the funniest thing to come out of her posting like a screenshot or some sort of fetish that Bill Bellicic has that he's not gonna write? Like Bill Bellicicic and Gronk. I guess he's gotta go for it too. Like some type of boy strip Bill Bellicicic went on. Yeah, and did what?

And did what? Partied. I think a foot fetish will be very funny. She had to think for fetish. She loved feet like Michael Parsons. That's why he loves Doug Flutey Dropkick. Yeah, yeah, piss situation. What if she, why are we just like not understanding

the obvious here? What if she just knows the playbook? Yeah. We're thinking about break up stuff. What if she just knows like, Bill Bela check, what do you think Bill Bela check in his girlfriend talk about at dinner? Football.

And the dog, she knows everything that Bill Bela check knows about football. The dog that Bill Bela check had drafting for the team that COVID year is her dog. Yeah, so it could be just. So the patrons might lose their GM. Yeah, fuck. That's tough.

It would actually, it would make a lot of sense if her and Tom Brady had a thing. Tom moves out of town, goes down to Florida. It was a lot easier for him to be with her when he was up in New England, just stay late at the facility. Now he's like hopping on planes, taking secret plane rides to go visit Lenda.

He gets caught, just hell breaks up with him. Maybe that's what was going on. This is, you should send this to Florian. I will. The good news is that Tom Brady will be in the building and they can probably talk about like how to deal with the public break up. They're honoring him. Oh, they're honoring him.

Yeah. You got to come out and special formation like Harbaugh. That'd be great. Also Hank, my, my antenna went up yesterday because Bella check gave one of his patented like 10 minute long answers. That was amazing. It was amazing. That's why I want them on the show so bad.

He does it like once a season and they asked him about long snappers. Do you really need a long snapper on the roster? Can't you just train somebody else that's an impact player to long snap and say that roster spot? Well, he goes on a 10 minute explanation about the history of special teams, punt block formation, and then how punters have now become holders, and it just goes into all these crazy football tangents. He gives a little smile at the end of it. Like, that's your one answer that you get per year.

I was happy to give it. I was thinking myself, maybe, it sounds like he's buttering up the media a little bit to get them on his side, being friendly with them, knowing that a bombshell is about to drop. I don't think there's a bomb show about to drop and you said he does it once a year and it's always a question that's a random question.

Usually about special teams or something like that that he just, he loves to go in depth on, show his knowledge. Okay. Okay. So, uh, Max, this is a big game for you. Why? Because let's be honest, the Eagles have super bowl aspirations. The Patriots, not a lot of people are patient to go to the Super Bowl. What would be one thing that would

bother you for the whole year is Hank having a trump card where he can just lay it on the table and be like, are the Eagles that good? The Patriots beat him. Yeah, that would really suck. But it's, it's, it comes down to this okay hold on hold on let me stand up and sit down for this okay all right it comes down to this Eagles are good Patriots bad Eagles Eagles D line best pass rush in the league except in the Super Bowl Pat's O-line turf. Bad. According to Pete Prisco. According to Pete Prisco.

Pat's O-line. Very bad. I don't know how they're stopping the Eagles D-line. And it's not like Mac Jones is gonna be evading a lot of pressure back there. That's really the only thing. I don't see a scenario where the Eagles D-line doesn't sack Mac Jones six times.

Did you hear the part about Brady being in the building? So don't care. Like really, really, really. Max, you know, like you've got both teams are already on the last one. It's not like you've never been in the top grade in the game. He doesn't even like him anymore. Also, luck with Max. The Eagles have the most weak one victories since 2011 in the league

They've won 10 of their last 12 week games. They're hot. Are you nervous? I'm excited. I've been there's more involved here the whole week afterwards One of you is gonna get to shit talk to you. No, no, this is a this is a win-win for Hank How I mean if they lose he doesn't give shit I do Why I mean if they lose he doesn't give shit I do shit. What do you mean? Like he did this last year with the past started to suck. He just didn't care That was gambling related which has gotten twisted on in an unbelievable way I am more excited for this season than I have been in in a while obviously There's so many years. What?

You had to, you had Tom Brown in the back. What about all the C-G1 Superbos? Those regular season was, it was nerve-wracking and it was literally just a, uh, basically the pre-season for the playoffs. It didn't matter what happened to the regular season. You knew you were going to the playoffs and you knew you had to go at least to the ASU championship, but the season was a disappointment. Even if they would win games, if they didn't win, you know, in a blowout,

people would still be shit talking, we spent so much time in the show where the Patriots would squeak out of win, you guys would be like, well, they're not that good, they barely won. This year, the expectations, everyone thinks they're gonna suck, everyone thinks the fucking jets and the dolphins

are like two of the greatest NFL franchises of all time, and the Patriots get to play spoiler all year long. It's exciting. Like, I, Wait, spoiler means you're bad. We get to play spoiler all year long. It's exciting. Like, I, spoiler means you're bad. We get to play spoiler. That means you're bad. They're gonna play spoiler. Let me see.

We're going to get one as bad. You're not worried. He's saying that they're going to spoil themselves into the play. I, exactly. I think in the national media, I have high expectations for this team, but the national media like, Gibronis like yourself, think they have not shot. You're on the exact same podcast. We're on. The Jets and Dolphins. for this team, but the national media like Gibronis like yourself think they have no shot. You're on the exact same podcast.

We're on the Jets and Dolphins. I said, I think the Patriots are gonna be bad. I just think their division is so fucking stacked that there's very margin, there's very thin margin for error for any team in the AFC. But the Patriots operate as a team that's much better with less margin for error. The Jets and the Dolphins are just notoriously joke franchises.

People are expecting them to like overcome all this stuff and ride into the play. You really are a Cowboys fan. We're America team. This is what a Notre Dame Cowboys fan would say and do. He said we're America. We are franchises of real franchise. The other franchise are jokes. Hank is looking at the colors

You're looking at the colors and saying could you ever see if franchise like the Tampa Bay Bucking Ears winning a suit Well, no, they had Tom Brady that's a that's a like basically the only reason they won that to be a Fiction that's pretty good. The box had to become the Patriots to win Yes Tom Brady and Grogg. Yeah, yeah true true. All right, so Hank give me your official Patriots record win. Yes. Tom Brady and Gronk. Yeah. Yeah. True. True. Alright, so Hank, give me your official Patriots record prediction this year. How many wins are you gonna spoil? 11. 11. So how many losses? Seven. Okay. 18 games. Good math. Six. Six. Six. Let's switch 18. 18 weeks. Yeah. On my. Yeah. Okay. Got it. right. We're excited for this game. We'll be streaming this game. This will be going on during bears packers. So

PFT will be sitting nice. One to know at this time. Yep. I'm jealous of you. Number one in the NFC East. Yeah. Yeah. Brady Jersey nuclear missile on the Pats. Oh, New football guy shirt. Nice. We have support team. Okay, Cowboys Giants last game, Sunday. I don't know, I just don't, I know that everyone's like, the Cowboys are so good. I just, I know we talked about this Pete Presco, but like Mike McCarthy's fat.

That press got throws interception. You clearly didn't read the news this morning, Pete. Oh no. Because the Dallas Cowboys have been training with Navy SEALs. Oh, shit. But not Mike McCarthy. Not Mike McCarthy.

No, so the Cowboys were training with SEALs. They had them lead like an off-site group meeting together. This how Tiger Woods got her. It's a Tiger Woods example. Yeah. 100%. So they just wrote down on a big whiteboard February 11th, 2024. Whoa.

That's the day of the Super Bowl. Yeah, I probably couldn't figure that one out. But that's what they're thinking soupy. Soupy, I'm excited to see what Dave does in the second year. I think he was the best coach in the NFL. The one thing I have to be fair, if we're going to say that the Vikings could potentially regress the mean on their one-score wins, the Giants also did have a lot of those wins.

They had a lot of weird wins where things kind of like the ball bounced our way in the fourth quarter. So sustainability, I don't know. I do think both teams would be very good though. I think, I think Giants, Giants, yeah, I think Giants coming up with the Cowboys. Dak Prescott has dominated the Giants. He's one 10 in a row. His last loss against like him in 2016 to put that them perspective.

Dangle Jones was a freshman at Duke. Okay. The last time he lost the lead. Whoa, that's wild. No, the Cowboys killed the Giants. Things like 16 and one or something ridiculous in the last like 10 years, whatever, however many years that is.

Okay, we'll do Bill's Jets on Sunday. We'll preview it when we recap all the games. Okay, that is the Um, okay, we'll do Bill's Jets on Sunday. We'll preview it when we, when we recap all the games. Okay, that is the full slate. Uh, let's do our picks. Uh, how are you starting who starts random? What did you do last? Random number, number generator. Yeah. So who's picking? Who are we keeping track of right now? Uh, you big cat. Hank Jake Max memes. You big cut, Hank Jake Max memes. It's a six of us. And reminder, it's two picks a week, no overlapping picks, and the loser has to do a one-hour live show in Las Vegas where they can only play one song on the guitar if they know it.

It has to be like three or four minutes. Can't do like a free bird. Yeah, I get to do a free bird. And they can't do like questions from the crowd. It has to be your talent on display. And we will put it on video, we'll put it on, maybe pay-per-view. We'll also second place is opening act for 15 minutes.

Yes. Okay, so let's see, who wants to be number one? Me. Okay, so Hank, your number one, two, three so Hank your number one two three four five. I'm number six. I'm doing the random number generator. Okay, generate one. Let's go. So Hank goes first. Yeah. You go second pft or I think we go clockwise. Okay, but you get a snake. Snake. So you get two picks in a row. Whatever. You two picks in whatever. All right. Hank, your best bet. Whatever you two picks it whatever. All right Hank your best bet

Oh Do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it to my face I want you to look me in the eye while you do it do it you fucking bitch. I would but it's a terrible pick So I'm gonna take the Patriots plus four. Okay, good pick. Okay, Patriots plus four is your pick against the Eagles. Against the Eagles. Okay, I am going to, I have a problem this week and my problem is I love every single underdog. Literally every single underdog. Story my life. It is a problem and I know that that's a problem.

I will go though with, I'll go with the Browns plus two and a half. Oh Browns plus two and a half that'll be my pick Memes they're gonna be so drunk and Cleveland. It's gonna be awesome going with the Seahawks minus four and a half Okay, okay, I see five and a half. I see four and a half I was gonna go that was gonna be my pick pick at I told memes at it at the time you rounds. Yeah, I stole your pick Yep, that was gonna be my pay Hell yes, but now I'm gonna tell memes your pick ahead of time They tell each other everything there are no secrets between these two girls I am going to go stealers plus two. Oh, okay. That was my that was my secondary pick max

Two and a half for that. I don't know if these are moving quickly. I get two and a half to great. Give me the half. Give him the half. I keep everyone honest. Well, you weren't doing a good job when you said five and a half. Yeah, then I refresh. Yeah. Okay. I'm going to go with Sean Peyton calling the game of his life, game of a lifetime, my three and a half Broncos against the Raiders. Okay. That's it. Okay. Okay. Pft. You got two pit. All right. I'm taking commies Let's go commanders minus seven Fire to miss a lot of two weeks ago. I feel more confident today. They're gonna win by 14. Okay, we're gonna win the Super Bowl this year

It's gonna be awesome And then I'm gonna go with For my other one totals. Yep, which you can pick in the front, like we all end up picking spread, but you can if you like it, total the most, you can pick it. So these are my two favorite picks. So I'm happy. I'm happy with where I'm at right now. Packers bears over 42.

Ah, like 41 and a half. 41 and a half. Let's go. Okay, dropping the last hour. I love that. The bears, they felt like they were over machines last year. Yep. And I feel like they'll be over machines again.

Yep. All right. I'm going with a non TV game under Panther Spalcons under 39 and a half. Oh, that's smart. Non TV game. That's like a movie strategy, right? Yeah.

Max. I'm going with the one I hate the most. And that is Communist Cardinals over 38. I think it is 38. We'll have that, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30, 30 Steelers over 41 and a half. Okay. Okay. I am gonna go with a non TV game as well. Falcons Panthers under 39 and a half. I feel like both teams are gonna run the ball. Oh, you took that? I think I took the uh, I think I took the Shit my bed. I like that pick a lot. I think Texas Ravens bad. Okay. I'm gonna go and over fuck that I'm gonna go dolphins chargers. That's a fun over. That's the fover. Yeah, 51 and a half fine

I bet a 50 and a half but fine because we did advisor yesterday, but that's fine I'll take that extra one definitely gonna land on 51 now 100% I'm gonna go with a shootout game a couple couple of juggernaut cubies over Packers, Bayer's 41 and half. We're bad at listening. Okay, I can't accuse you of being bad at listening. I can't accuse myself. I can't bad. Listen, you're Hank. I also have bad. It's the same group. I'll rebump with you guys, but it's a shareable doc that I'm writing. I will never open it. I know you want, but just. I'm trying. Over Jags Colts, 46 and a half. Oh, memes took that. Bad listener.

Didn't memes took that? Yeah. No, it's kidding. We could have, I wish we had kept on going because we could have done that with every, he wasn't listening to any of the picks. Who's in the hungry dog? Yeah.

Patriots. To it. Cardinals. You piece of shit. Browns. Okay. Well, I have, I have a can't lose Parley that's going to have the, the commanders and the Ravens. And I haven't decided the third. I love that. Doesn't matter, but it's going to be great. I've got a, I've got a PFTs. We're teasing, we're teasing the Vikings down to minus one against the box and the Packers bears over 36 and a half. It's plus 100. So even money. I like that.

Okay. Let's get to fantasy fuck boys. You ready? Hit the music. Let's go. Lost autumn. Oh my bad. Yeah.

My name's Mikey Rieger Rieger Rieger Tony Mikey Rieger Tony Rieger Rieger Rieger Rieger Rieger Rieger Rieger Tony Rieger Rieger My stardom is diarrhea I keep the spot and talk about diarrhea but on the front lines as rumors it was a woman After all that I had diarrhea myself last night I got like three hours of sleep because I kept waking up and pooping That's fucking weird. I had diary last night too. It's cool Cycles linked up

Yawning you talk about yawning and then you yawning you talk about diarrhea and you shit your pants My fuck my whole sounds like this. Oh my bad. That's thanks y'all And he'll always be poopin my sit-em is Timothy chamalay chamalay You fucking weirdo. He's Dayton Kylie Jenna and his super fans are angry about it. Oh, Shamalay in that pipe And my sleeper is Bill Pellet checks Emma Things gonna be getting a lot of use these next couple weeks out. He's a single man Yeah, maybe Bobby Kravkin take him down to Jupiter Florida. Yeah, it, maybe Bobby Kraft can take him down the tube of the Florida. Yeah, boy's track. Boy's shirt.

Let's go. All right. Hey, what's up? You dickheads. This is Silvio Burlaskoni. Oh, all right, Pete. All right, Pete. Yeah, we're talking about Obama being gay.

Everyone's gay. I'm gay. This my gay side is a lesbian. Yeah. I love it that much. I'm starting Nick Bosa. Nicky Bosa, starter. He's got all the Skarol.

He missed work for four weeks. Didn't show up at all. That's how we built this planet, you know? Stand up guys. That's how we did our business in Newark. It's connected. He's connected. No show job.

I'm sitting LeBron James. Sitting LeBron James took a little business trip to Saudi Arabia. Don't know if you guys saw that. He met with Abdul Aziz, bin Saud al-Saud. His friends would recon. He's a massive sport. He's the interior decorator for Saudi Arabia.

But his place looks like shit, you know? My sleeper, I'm not sleeping anymore because his football season. Yeah. No sleep, no sleep. No sleep, no sleep till Brooklyn. I would stop you, fuckers. It's Bernino, Tostino, some BT.

Yeah, BT in the house, my stardom. I actually confused the boss of Brothers, so I wrote down Joey Posa, but he's not the one that got paid. Nikki Joey. Joey, we went to beat Nikki, we went to beat for Joey. So I fucked that up, but it's still pretty easy for me. My sit-em love doesn't always win. We were talking about Jordan Love.

He's not a winner. And how about Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas. How about them? I'll never I'll never believe in love again. I know exactly what happened. That story is a thing I'm gonna add his comment to that because I know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah, Joe bro They broke up. Oh Ring Camergata. She's broke. He's a ring Camergata. You always got to be worried about who's wiretapping who that's unbelievable as a bug in here is guma came Oh, it's both no hair guma her guma his right her ring camera her guma her ring his house Yeah, he was she was getting wind and died in 69 while he was taking care of the kids back home She's broke my wrong my sleep is no sleep just like PFT,

but you're doing with Stel Blue Coffee. New flavors. Pumpkin spice, apple crisp, apple crisp, got PFT and Leroy on it as well. Go buy it right now. We got new flavors. Too far. You get a-

What's up, the bitches in one for the blow? Make a little cappuccino Do go buy sell blue coffee sell blue coffee. I got new two new flavors. They're delicious. The apple crisp is awesome I have this morning. I'm gonna get special very good big cat special two new flavors Yeah, the big cat combo. It's coffee with a little bit of cream. Yeah, baby All right, let's get to our interview. We have an awesome awesome interview with Dan Patrick Really, really good time catching up with him and his new book out, PFT. What have we got before we get to Dan Patrick?

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Okay, we now welcome on a very, very, very special guest, one of our favorite guests. It's been a while, but it is Dan Patrick. And he has a new book out now. You can go buy it right now. It's called the occasionally accurate anals of football. Now, let's start with that. Yeah, did you, did we talk to Penguin about this book?

Did they say, hey, let's not put the word anals in the book title, because it might not sell as well? Well, it could be marketed to a different audience, but I thought that maybe annals was a little tricky there, including for myself, but they went with it. I was overridden on this. Yeah, you have to take into account the kind of idiots that are going to be interviewing you about this book, and we might not be the best at pronouncing words. Yes, I saw and I was like,el's, wow, this is crazy.

All right, so we got a digital copy of the book, so we feel special because we saw it before everyone else got to read it. I'm going to say right off the bat, great job writing the book because there's pictures and there's pages that have a paragraph. And I love books that you can just, you know, you can rip through pages. You're like, I'm really crushing this book right now.

There's a picture, there's a picture. So great job with that. It's basically, it's not a children's book, but it's for dumb idiots like us who don't really read that often. Well, sometimes we don't get credit for reading books and this helps you get credit that you've read a book and it doesn't take that.

Yeah, it's not that difficult challenging to read this book. Pictures and sometimes some big words, some big lettering. Yeah, so what made you want to do this book? Because it is football. It's a love story to football. I mean, that right there is a seller. Like I'm, I'm going to buy the book, even though I have the digital copy because I love you so much. Uh, but what made you, what were you like, hey, let's do this book. It was during the pandemic

and I was talking to Joel Cohen, who writes for the Simpsons and he was talking about writing an episode and including me in the Simpsons. And then we just started talking when we were done and then he started throwing out these topics and he goes, what do you think? Does this bother you? And then I revisited that with him and I said, what do you think about just putting all this stuff down on paper and see if there's something there?

Because we have all this free time. And then he went back, I went back, we just threw some things together and he said, you know, I reached out to a couple other people that I work with, Andy Richter, who worked with Conan. He just had a bunch of people and he said, you know, how about we just collaborate with a bunch of these topics and make it seem like this is the true hit, like, you know, who wrote the Bill Simmons wrote the history of the NBA. I mean, this is nothing like that, but we can present it like we're giving you the history of the NFL. All these talk topics and, uh, just have wild takes on them, have fun with them and hopefully we don't get sued.

I said, okay, I'm in. Yeah. I read the blurbs page on it. And, um, I'm a little bit offended. He asked Floreo to give you a blurb. He blurbed the shit out of you too. But it is a half fiction book, so he's good at that. Yeah, he does love that. Why did we not get the invite to blurb you?

Well, I was worried about you. That's fair. Yeah, I mean, I was. Yeah, big cat, big cat, not worried. Okay. I go off the rails. And if I'm asking you to, then I can't edit what you give me. And then I was worried about your collaboration.

To be honest, that was it. Because you know, we had problems with the whole van show. Yeah. Remember, yeah, we were trying to let you on fire. Yes, exactly. And I thought, you know what, time is passed, but let's, let's, uh, let's not chance it right now. Yeah. That's, that's honestly a fair answer. I'm, I'm, when is passed, but let's, let's not chance it right now. Yeah, that's, that's honestly a fair answer.

I'm going to write the occasionally, you know, accurate, anal's of our stole van talk. We won't ask you to write anything. So little tip for tat. No, he can, if he wants to, because if you're writing the history of that, it's going to need my story and you're going my story and you're gonna need my help on that. It's a 10-page book. It actually will be the anal's.

And you're only allowed to talk about people's butts in. What was the impression you had of our bumholes over then? I'm looking at the cover of your book right now, and it's a pig skin, it's a football that's sliced in a different parts, almost like a pig at a butcher shop. And the top, the top middle says Tom Brady, worst of all time. What does that mean?

That sounds spicy. That's going to sell some books. That's in the book. I mean, you can't just read the blurbs. You got to read the book. Yeah. It gets a tease. I don't go, oh, gosh, I watched the trailer of the movie.

Tell me how it ends. Okay. So do you think that Tom Brady, I'll put it to you this way. Do you think Tom Brady is the best quarterback to ever play football? Oh, good question. He's the most decorated. I said, best, best.

Who's the best? Well, what is, what is best? I think winning super longs, good point. Well, the best actor doesn't always win the most Academy Awards. But who has the most Academy Awards? Look at it. I'm gonna look it up right now. Yeah, what did you?

We've gotten ourselves in a hole here. So if you're saying, I understand what you're saying. You're saying Tom Brady, by his, if you look at the tangibles, arm strength, speed, elusiveness, accuracy, might not be the best quarterback of all time. In fact, you could probably make the argument Patrick Mahomes might be the best quarterback of all time. If I'm looking at talent, it feels like Aaron Rogers is always credited with being the most talented person to play the position. Does that make him the best? Or is it Brady because he won

this most Super Bowls? I still look at John L. Wei as that first quarterback who could beat you with his legs and his arm single-handedly dragging that offense to Super Bowls that they never should have gone to. And then he got the blame for that. Then they win to and then he doesn't get credit for it. It's Terrell Davis in the offensive line. But, L-way to me, when you combine arm, size, athleticism, he was the first guy that I looked at. Modern era, and I went, that guy changed football. But I have no problem with people saying Brady's great is quarterback. I think it gets tricky sometimes with that. You know, his Montana knot or he won four didn't lose any super balls. So, well, according to NBC during the broadcast that you were on Notre Dame, he won five super balls. So that's pretty impressive. Well, he did

tell me that he gave his four kids each one of his super balls. So he only has four kids. So that's where I knew that he didn't win five super balls because he doesn't have five kids. Wait, are we passing over Dan Marino? I mean, Dan Marino. You can make the cases, like watching old Dan Marino clips and what he did, his arm talent is just out of this world. Marino changed the game.

Like when you say, guys change, you know, Steph Curry changed the NBA. Dan Marino changed the game because back then, who was doing five wide, no running backs, and all their doing is throwing passes, quick releases, all of those things. And, and Marino in today's game, I get beat, you know, approached 6,000 yards probably. He'd throw for 50 touchdown because that wasn't the difficulty for him. He was doing that before. And he's convincing Don Schuila, a defensive-minded head coach, let me throw the ball as much as I want.

I like this. It's talking ball. What's the spiciest take? Can you give us a tease of the spiciest take or another take that you have in this book that people can can buy it and be like, I'm going to buy it because I want to want to get to this point and be like, Oh, I heard that on part of my take. So we cover the best game ever, worst game ever, most penalized game, the sneakers game, fog bowl, the catch, the drive, the wizzinator. There's no topic that we shy away from. Let's put it that way. We fix penalties. Let's see. Wayne Gretzky is involved in this. What

you bring to a tailgate, we revisit the immaculate reception, the butt fumble. We talk about how bad pat the Patriot was, the media's impact. I have people who assess my talent as a broadcaster, Pro and Con. So we pretty much cover everything there. I like it. I like it. And to your point about Dan Marino as great of a player as he is, even better interview.

Just a rock solid guy to talk to. I don't know if you're familiar with this, Dan, but we had Dan Merino on the show at the Super Bowl right after you had him on. I think he left your set, came to the back of our van where we were doing the interview, and he looked at us like, who are these assholes that I'm about to talk to.

And I blame you for not softly getting up enough for us because he was not happy to be stuck between me and big cat in the back of the van. But if you would have said, hey, could you kind of, you know, ease this, you know, down into us, you know, say some nice things about it, I would have done that. Yeah, but it was like he went he went to your show and he had like a great New York strip and then he came to our show and we gave him like a dollar cheeseburger and maybe like a crack pipe and he was like, how did I end up here? What life decisions that I make that got me to this point? Yeah, it didn't go great, but that's okay. Interviews,

what's your worst interview of all time? Besides Qualcomm. Oh, yeah, I love this thing. Qualcomm in the legendary, yeah. Matt Harvey. Yeah. He had no idea how to do an interview. And he's in New York and he's got a product to promote Qualcomm and he comes on and I guess it just had surgery or needed surgery or something and I said, hey, can we talk about that? And he goes, no, no, I'm just here to talk about Qualcomm.

And I said, you got to be fucking kidding me. Don't you understand? This is quid pro quo. Like, give me something and then I'll let you talk about Qualcomm. And so that ended quickly. And then I guess they kind of got together and said, you need to go back on there. So the next day he came on. And I think he sort of figured out what he was supposed to do. Tony Harding didn't go well. Whitey Herzog did not go well. But sometimes that's good when they don't go well. It's still entertaining, which it sometimes it hurts,

but you know it's content. And but yeah, Tony Harding and Whitey Herzog were bad. There was a great interview I saw. It wasn't on your show, but it's somebody else that was interviewing Aaron Donald. And all he wanted to talk about was bath salts. He wanna talk about Epsom salts the entire time. And he just kept tying everything back.

And he's like, I'm not here to talk about the NFL or my career. I wanna talk to you guys about bath salts. And he got so bad that it actually was a great interview. He is, if I was sponsoring an athlete, I would want to sponsor Aaron Donald and he would only talk about me. But sometimes these guys don't understand,

we'll get to your plug. Right. But they, Magic Johnson was with us, so I don't know, six weeks ago. And I was talking about, you know, Steph Curry is a point guard and, you know, I thought we were chopping it up. And then he came back around to why he was on there. And therefore I couldn't get him to just have a conversation, let you get your plug in,

conversation, let you get your plug in, say goodbye to Magic Johnson. And, uh, you know, I, I, I, it got tripped up. And so we, we could never really land on the same page here. He wanted to promote. I wanted to interview. So other side of that coin, who's the best interview that you've ever done? Oh, I don't know if I have somebody that would stand out. There, there've been, there've been a lot of them to choose from, but I've been doing

it a long time. So I think anybody who's honest, because your audience wants to know, why are you having this person on? And when you get that person on and you say, hey, you're gonna love this guy, then that's what makes it rewarding. But there are times when you oversell or you undersell, but anybody who's gonna tell you the truth

or give you some really good stories, that's really what I'm trying to subscribe to every time I have somebody on. That's a smart answer too because we sat down a couple of weeks ago and we did amount rush more of our favorite recurring guests that we've had on our show. That was a bad idea to name names because then you you leave out like 200 people that get pissed off at you that never want to come back on your show again. So you're pro. You didn't fall for that trap. Yeah. everyone to come back on your show again. So your pro, you didn't fall for that trap. Yeah.

Thanks, smart man. You also, we should have said to start, congratulations on the weirdest contract extension of all time. Yeah, you completely, for people who don't know, Dan came on the show one day, he was like, I'm working four more years. And everyone was like, everyone, you know,

all these guys in the room are like, shit, four more years, all right. Like, he's retiring all his guys in the room are like, shit, four more years. All right. Like he's retiring soon. And then the next day he's like, I forgot to say I just signed an extension for four years. So you, I mean, was everyone freaking out like you, you know, you got a whole crew. No, they were okay. It was everybody else's reaction that I was announcing my retirement for.

I was announcing that in four years. And so people are texting or calling my wife saying, is Dan retiring? And she said, no, in four years. But I screwed up the order instead of saying, hey, sign a contract extension. And then I'm going to retire when that contract is over. But it turned out, I mean, I got four years of a send off. So I should get some really, really fucking nice gifts. I'm guessing. Yeah. Coach K is like, I didn't know you could do four years. What the fuck? You can't, it's not going to sneak up on you when I retire. So you can't say, yeah, I didn't see that one coming.

You're on the Olympic cycle. This is crazy. Wait, so are you actually going to retire though? Because I'm very curious about this. We're young or, but I do think like, hey, is there a time when you can retire from this? If you're truly addicted to what we do and I am addicted to what we do, I enjoy it so much, do you actually think you'll be able to, to turn it off like not go to the Super Bowl, not go to the final four. Do these big events that you've done for so many years? I mean, there's

going to be a point where you were like, man, why did I, I still got some gas left in the tank here. Well, there'll be other things that I do. I have a broadcasting school. San Earl keep putting me in movies. Yeah. And there'll be other things along the way. But I mean, it's a grind every day, three hours a day. It's live. And there are times, you know, like July. God, July is tough.

Yeah. Like, what are you talking about in July? There are other, you know, moments, months that you go this is easy, but it's a young man's game And I want to make sure I go out on what I would consider going out as Myself going out in style not like just hanging on like oh my god. Look at that guy Listen to I mean I feel bad for him. Yeah, and so I just I didn't want that to happen, but but counterpoint late Francesca was hilarious. No, but I don't want you to laugh at me. I don't want you to laugh with me. Okay, okay. There's a difference. There's a difference in

that. I just don't want to be like, come here and listen to that. That is sad right there. Yeah, falling asleep. Yeah. Yeah. I mean that would be there would be entertaining in a different way. But yeah, I respect it. One of the best all-time clips in sports radio is Francesca reading Jacob de Grom's run support that he got for an entire year. And just saying, two, one, two,

it's like Bingo. Three. He just goes on for like a minute and a half saying numbers, that's great. I mean, people listen to it. Oh, but my favorite is still Albert Kirkey. Yeah, fake name. When somebody called up and then Mike said,

there's nobody named Albert Kirkey. And then I think later he goes, Oh, you mean Albert Albert Kirkey? No. Yeah, I don't want that to happen. So I'm always interested to know from guys that do solo radio. Obviously, you have the Danettes, so they provide a lot of content for you as well.

But at the crux of it, your show is one man talking to a microphone for three hours. You came from doing sports center where things, for the most part, they're scripted. There was some ad-libbing, and obviously, you like to have a lot of fun with that. But then you transition just sitting behind a mic and it's constant, Dan Patrick opinions for three hours, non-stop. Was that, did you sit down the first day and after 30 minutes, you're like,

what the fuck have I gotten myself into? Well, I think people who do radio or want to do radio go, oh, that's not difficult, all you do is talk. And then those people usually get 20 minutes in and they go, now what do I talk about? Or what else can we talk about? I think you have to be strategic in who you have on, what are your topics, and then it gets into a rhythm,

gets into a flow. But when we were on sports center, probably 11 o'clock sports center, I'm gonna guess 60% was ad live because you're ad living all the highlights You know stuff that's on camera on prompter, you know, obviously that's scripted But I always loved radio. I thought that was the purist form where you can communicate you could say something to somebody They have to visualize something when they're listening to your voice. If I mentioned somebody's name, then you think of them. You let me into your car, like it's personal, it's intimate. Your voice, what it means to people. And I wasn't big into TV, because it was a lot for very little. You'd spend eight hours writing a show

where you'd go on and you'd be on for an hour. And you could have a great show and then somebody say, you know, how could you wear that tie or your hair looked like, you know, just stuff where you go, really, that's what it comes down to. But radio is different. It's just your voice and how it resonates with people. It's true. It's good point. I mean, that's why even the one show we did on ESPN, I think we both realized quickly, this is different and not as fun as doing a podcast, because a podcast is similar to radio where we don't have a time limit.

We can just talk for, you know, if we find something funny and we just go down a rabbit hole, those are the best moments. And being able to have that free form, where you can really like, you know, dive into something, I think the audience loves. Well, that's what changed when I left ESPN because I thought it was kind of formulaic that I was trying to be an ESPN radio host instead of just being myself. And when I left and we were doing

the first three years we did the show in my attic and I just said, we're going to talk about whatever we want to talk about whatever we want to talk about. And not, well, you got to check the box, check the box, check the box, and then have this analyst on for the mothership. It was, I don't care what it is, because if we're into it, your audience will be into it. If you have fun with it, and that's what, like your audience, loyal, and they listen to you, so they'll invest in what you're

talking about because you're interested. And I said to the Danettes, I said, I just want to have fun. You know, I don't care if it's about movies or music or something embarrassing or you have the Jomontana on. We're going to have fun every single day. And that to me is contagious. Nobody wants to listen to somebody bummed out in the morning or yelling and screaming in the morning. It's like, have fun every single day. And that to me is contagious. Nobody wants to listen to somebody bummed out the morning or yelling and screaming in the morning. It's like, have fun. No.

And that's the approach that we've had for going on now 17 years. It's a very good point. So you mentioned the Danettes. Do you miss Mick Lovyn or never even think about him? I don't think about him unless he's brought up. That's going to kill him. I love Pearl. I become very good friends with him, but that's going to hurt him. Well, I would tell him to his face that I don't miss him, but I don't want to miss him because I had to do a show and Marvin took over for McLevin and gave us a whole different kind of feel to the show.

But I, McLevin bought in to being sort of a class clown for us. And here's an Ivy League educated guy and I said, look, you got to laugh at yourself. You got to have fun. And that's hard to do because, you know, everybody has pride and an ego and I'm asking you, if I'm going to make fun of myself and look silly or sound silly, you need to. If I'm going to make you wear an Alabama game jersey and nothing on underneath walking around the streets of New York, then you have to be willing to do that. Or pie to the face or whatever my or flinch ball like stupid things, but

let's have fun with it. And he did that for the longest time. And then I think he wanted to be a radio or, you know, he wanted to be a real journalist again. And I wasn't going to allow him to continue to do that. He is the best though. Since we're talking about your career, what year was your best hair year? I was saying early to mid 90s. I think I was crushing it. Yeah, that was because you do have a phenomenal hair and I just always wonder if someone like who has such great hair, do they look back and they're like, man, at this point, I was throwing 99 on

the black. Like, that was it. That was my hair. It's like Pam Anderson running on the beach in Baywatch. Like she can look back and go, I had it on. I don't know. It's sort of me running on the beach in Baywatch with my hair. Yeah.

Although PFT has made fun of me. Like, I think you showed me a picture. Go, are you proud of that? And then my hair looked really bad. I forget where me a picture. Go, are you proud of that? And then my hair looked really bad. I forget where we were. You go, are you proud of that? Yeah. No.

You've had great hair, but you've also had bad hair days. And you could tell which one it was. Like I always had the hypothesis when I was watching because I used to, I used to tune into your show all the time as a kid. It was like religious for me. Every morning I would watch sports center, then I would go to school.

I would be five minutes late for class because I had to finish watching sports center, then leave to go to elementary school. And I knew if Dan's having a good hair day, he's gonna be bringing the fire with the voiceovers. If it's a bad hair day, it's like free willy or like an orca with the dorsal fin that's like drooped over.

He's not gonna have the confidence state. It's like look good, feel good, feel good, play good. Yeah. You could be right. There could be a correlation between that. Look good, feel good, play good. Sometimes I gave you angry highlights too, because I knew my hair wasn't great. And therefore it made me be a little more critical of a player or a team. So it could have consciously or subconsciously affected my delivery on sports center. Were players ever would they get upset with you for delivering a bad highlight? Yes. Was there you said something? If you said something and sometimes it was

they didn't hear it, but somebody else did. And then by the time it got to them, they're like Rob Deer, who played for the Detroit Tigers. All he did was hit home runs and strike out. And I remember having a highlight where I said, here's Rob Deer, all he does is hit home runs and strike out. And that's the whiff. Both for three on the night. So I'm out at a ballpark, which I always believe go out.

And just in case somebody wants to say something to you, they can't. And he came up to me and goes, why do you say all I do is strike out or hit home runs? I go, Rob, that's all you do. He goes, that's true, but you don't have to say that. And I go, you hit home runs and you strike out. You strike out a whole lot more than you hit home runs. But you have run-ins with people, you know the whole

Alex Rodriguez criticizing Derek Geter's contract when he was on my show and then he claimed that it That we weren't really on the air that he thought he was off the air with me, but he was criticizing Derek Geter Now I don't even know that he's mad at me. We do the interview and then this is a couple of years later. And we're in Dallas and I said to my guys, I said, you know, we should reach out and see if A. R. I'd once join us on the show called the PR guy said, oh, Alex loves you. I know that. Yeah, sure. And he calls back. He says, Alex has a problem with you. I go,

okay, I'll just come over to the locker room. I get word that he's really got a problem with me because of this Derek Jeter thing. I didn't even know it. I go over, I go in the locker room and you got, you know, steroid row there with a conceco and some of the other players, Rafael Palmeir, they're on the back of a couch and they're looking as I walk in, A Rod is at his locker with a guy, I think his name was Mike Lamb. And he's just talking to him and makes me wait, probably 15 minutes. I'm just standing there. And then I thought he was going to punch me because he started yelling at me. And I said, Alex, it was on the record.

You know it was on the record. And I had Rob Dibble with me at the time. I said, look, I said it did. If he hits me, he goes, I got your back. I'll take him out. So I got all the guys from the Rangers and they're waiting for it. They think something's going to happen here, but that got close to go time, I think, for Alex.

Damn. Was there any other time that an athlete got mad at you? Because it is true. It's weird. We always, we want the guests to be happy and to feel good about the interview, but sometimes it just doesn't work out that way. And it's like, well, you knew what you were getting into when you came on the show. But I don't do gotcha. Yeah. I try to be as professional and if I do a gotcha, it's

accidental. I'm not out there to get Alex Rodriguez. But as soon as he calls in, I said, hey, we're recording. And he goes, can you believe what they're going to pay, you know, Derek? And then I go, why? And he goes, he doesn believe what they're going to pay, you know, Derek? And I go, why? And he goes, he doesn't do anything better than like you just started going on and on and on. And we told him that we were recording. And it Lawrence Taylor threatened me one time when he's bad.

Yeah. Yeah. Bad. He had been suspended for cocaine use. And he read a statement inside the giant's headquarters, they're training camp headquarters. So all the print guys got the, you know, what LT was saying. And I was outside and I had my camera man.

So he comes out and he has these dark sunglasses on. And he walks out and I had my camera man. So he comes out, he has these dark sunglasses on. He walks out and I said, Lawrence, Dan Patrick from CNN, can I, can you read that statement on camera for me? And he says, no. So I keep moving down the road with him walking towards his dark blue Porsche and then I go, moving down the road with him walking towards his dark blue Porsche. And then I go, LT, can you just read that on camera? I want to ask any questions. Read the statement on camera. Why don't you learn the whole story? I said, I know the story.

I called your agent. I spoke to your agent. No, you didn't. I said, yes, I did. Now I turned to my cameraman. I still remember his name, Ricky Shine. I said, Ricky, if he hits me, keep rolling. And then he said, he goes a little bit further, walking to his car. And I said, he said, don't you ask me one more time? And I could see the whites of his eyes through these sunglasses that were as dark as PFTs.

I go, holy shit, I'm in trouble. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So he turns and then gives me this look, side eye and I go, oh my God. Now I know it's like to be Joe Thysman. And he gets into his Porsche, peels off.

Peter King is working for New York News Day. He runs out and he goes, what happened? What happened? And I told him this story and he goes, okay, that's awesome. And then I think Peter wrote about it, didn't get the interview, but I truly thought LT was going to, he was going to take me out that day. Yeah. There was a time we interviewed LT and Hank had to tell him like, hey, you have to hold the microphone closer to your mouth when you talk. And LT gave that same look to Hank.

Like I will kill you. Yeah. And Hank was like, shut the fuck up. Fair enough. Yeah. I love. Yeah. He was original shut the fuck up, Hank.

Yeah. I am curious, no, though, when you're doing an interview and you feel like your guest is getting into gotcha territory on their own, not that you're setting them up, but you can feel they're saying something in flammatory, something that they'll probably regret saying after the interview's over. Do you try to rescue them? Do you try to allow them like follow up

and try to add a little bit of nuance to what they say? Are you as far as you're concerned? It's like you said it. Let's just, let's keep this going. Well, I still have to do my job. And it's a fair question to ask, but my job is still content and the people are listening or tuning in.

But there are times when you, we had Tracy Morganon promoting a new special when we were in Ireland. And Will Ferrell was there and their friends and Tracy was just talking about, you know, his house and, you know, his daughter wants to be a marine biologist and I got a pool and it's got sharks in. And then he was like, do you want to know what I feed my sharks? You want to know what I feed my sharks? I'm gonna to quarter reekens. And I go, no, you can't say that. He goes, yeah, they gave me, yeah, they gave me the joke. And I'm going.

So he just set it in a way and then I went, oh my God. Am I gonna get crushed for letting him say that? But I tried to get him to back it, but he's a comedian. So it was out was, it was out there. It was done. And sometimes there's a point of no return where you go. All right. Yeah. Next topic. Yeah. And then move on. Comedians do get a different set of rules. Yeah, we try not to do gotchas well in this show just because we want people to have fun. We also play this fun game called, uh, we read a headline, uh, if you want to play that

with us. Uh, all right. So I'm just going to read a headline. If you want to play that with us. All right. So I'm just going to read a headline, the new comment. By the way, by the way, I don't know if you saw this. I don't know if the clip went viral as the kids like to say, but Will Farrell had his prosthetic testicles from step brothers that he he hits on John C. Riley's drum kit. Yeah. He brought those to Dublin and and had them a box, $10,000. It took to make these prosthetic testicles and lifelike. So I pull it out of the box and I show it on the air. And the fact that we'll travel to Dublin

with these in his bag, his bag and his bag. And I thought, now I didn't know if I could show those on the air, but I thought, you know, I'm gonna take a chance just in case, and I'd rather beg for forgiveness there than ask for permission. But I did not realize, like those were life-like testicles that he had, that he has a box in it that just says testicles from step brother. Wait, did you get yelled at? No one said anything yet.

Okay. No one. But I don't know if you, I don't know what you can show in. I mean, the body is a beautiful thing. So I just thought balls. Yeah, balls are not beautiful. The male body is hideous. It really is.

Like God bless. Balls are gross when you think about it. I can't believe women allow us to like climb on top of them it it it is bad like when you think about it yeah it's gross but don't women always say don't send me you know the dick pic i mean they don't say to me but i just that like they don't want to see that yeah well the there's a there's a great group of guys on the internet uh who I'd love to interview who just send Unsolicited dick pics to like porn stars being like this is gonna work. She'll see my cock and be like, yeah, it's on Let's go. I want to date you. I know what to do with that

Yeah, but you couldn't get a true assessment though of yourself. If you're gonna ask a porn star. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, I don't want to get rated there. That's definitely. Just she just thumbs down it and just be like, next, all right. So we read, we read a headline and you comment on it. The headline is Dan Patrick unloads on Joe Biden

for not caring about US citizens. Absolutely. Well, you have me, what what why'd you say that? Oh, is that the lieutenant governor just a tax, just a standard Patrick unloads on Joe Biden for not caring about USA? The game is very simple. We read a headline. I know, but I get blamed for a lot of the things that this guy in Texas says.

Yeah, somebody said, uh, what do you have against the elderly, a friend of mine, I went to dinner and he stopped by and he goes, what do you have against the elderly? And I go, what are you talking about? Because no, this was during the pandemic that I think this Dan Patrick in Texas said, you know what, old people die. And basically if they die, so what? And then I got blamed for that for some of the things that he said, we don't, we don't align politically. And so he had some, he said some things to say that I've had to apologize

for. You should start just publicly walking back things that he says, just reverse headlining him. It's like, did Patrick takes back everything he said. I should have said that. Sputamin a box. I like it. Yeah. What do you have against the elderly? Nothing.

Yeah. You said they die. I did not. That is a fact. That's a fact. Dan, do elderly people die? They do. But I do care when they die.

That's the difference. It didn't say he was basically saying, Hey, out with the old in with the new. Yeah. Yeah. That's it's probably a little bit easier now that you don't show up as like the first verified check mark on Twitter when you search for a Dan Patrick on Twitter. Good. Because of because of you know, blue check marks going everywhere now. But I would imagine that, you know, four or five years ago, every time he would say something, people would just flock to your page and be like, what's going on here?

Yeah. Uh, Kat, how's being a father? It's the best. I mean, I'm in the shit, though. I got a four year old, two year old, and three month old. So it's chaos at all times. Yeah. And we had four under seven.

That's crazy. That's insane. I don't I was working second shift at ESPN for at the time that's four under seven four is insane. Four. I mean, I three feels insane. Four. I feel like you become you know, like when someone gets like a couple cats and they're just a cat person, when you get to four or five kids, you're just a kid person. Like that's all you do. Well, how many cats do you become a cat person? you get to four or five kids, you're just a kid person. Like that's all you do. Well, how many cats do become a cat person? Three. I think it's three. It's three. You get two cats because you get the first cat,

kind of weird, then you get the second cat because your cat needs a friend and then you get a third cat and all bets are off. They're also in asterisk. You can be a cat person if you have two cats and the majority of your furniture is, is you bought four your cats. You know, you know those people where you walk in and there's like the pole and everything like a walkway that goes across the living room. Yeah, he's an

end is a cat person. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I, I know somebody in the family tree, they at last count had 22 cats. Oh my God. That's disturbing. That's crazy. All right. So wait, you asked me about my kids. I want to ask you a real question about balancing, you know, being a dad and doing your job with their moments that you look back and you're like, man, maybe I shouldn't have worked so hard because I I struggle with that. Oh, absolutely. I have his selfish. Absolutely. Yeah. I thought I had to be Absolutely. Yeah. I thought I had to be because he has pinned back then was really, really competitive. I mean, he had Burman, Bob Lee, he had Chris Myers, Chris Valor, Mike Toreco, Obermann, myself, Craig Killborn. You know, we're all in there. And at the time everybody was doing sports center, it was really, really competitive. And I thought, God,

I can never turn. I'd, you know, at some point, we were doing six days a week of sports center. And you're in there at three in the afternoon and then you're out at midnight. So I would, the kids would be up and out of the house. I'd wake up, I'd go to work, I'd come home, they'd be in bed.

So for like five days, I didn't see them. Right. So I didn't see them. Right. So I didn't raise them. My wife did, but there were times when you're like, you know, you're trying to cram everything together in one afternoon. Where you're like, I'm gonna make up for being the shittiest dad, and I'm gonna do it in like three hours.

What do you wanna do, kids? And they're like, nothing. Yeah. We don't need to. It's tough. I've found a good balance in that the fact that like, when I'm home, I'm home, you know what I mean? Like, and it's like stuff like,

Sundays we work from noon till 2 a.m., but Sunday mornings, like, you know, until I have to leave for work. It's like, let's do stuff. Let's be together and do that stuff. But yeah, it's, I definitely like, think about it it a lot being like, man, am I making a mistake? But how many daughters do you have? One daughter. Okay. She's my favorite. Yes. Yes. And there's nothing wrong with having a favorite. Yeah. No, I don't buy it when people say

they don't have a favorite. It's like, that's just not. And now the rankings, it's like the A.P. people. It goes up and down week to week. Like it's, you know, we get the voting going in. It depends on how everyone's been doing. So it definitely changes. But yes, there's always a favorite at a certain point. But your daughter, it's, these are, these are tricky relationships. Make sure you do things that are just for her sometimes.

You do stuff with the boys. Make sure you do things that are just for her sometimes. You do stuff with the boys, but I found it being a really good listener opens that pathway. I have three daughters and you know we're in constant contact texting, whatever it is. And then my oldest is a boy, but your daughter is tricky because I promise you this in 10 years from now. I'll run into you and you go I'll be damned man. My daughter remembers this and this and this and not that your boys won't but your daughter is gonna see you with your wife and Remember how you are with her if you're in the kitchen you're holding her hand you're dancing with you're laughing with you you're in the kitchen, you're holding your hand, you're dancing with, you're laughing with,

whatever it is, girls, they pick up and they do not forget. So always remember, they're watching and they're listening for good or bad. All right, so she's gonna be a degenerate horse better. We got that. That's, that's, check that one off. No, it's good advice. It's good advice. Yeah. It's basically boys are dumb, which they are. We're boys. We're dumb. Have you watched boys on a playground? Yeah. They just do stupid shit. They just bang each other and you know, run around and

be in goofy. Meanwhile, girls are calculated. Yeah. You know, they're already got clicks and you know, they're backstabbing and you know, they're stuff going on It's true. It's very simple. You just play till you get hurt. Yeah, and then you're like, I can't play Oh, I was at the park the other day and there was a kid just with a huge whiffable bat just walking around just smashing kids In like the face in the back and I was like, who is this kid? I was like, but guess what? They're all laughing who cares? It's just boys boys being boys To the utmost. Is that are you done with three? Yes. Yes. Three is three is it.

Three is it. Three is too many. So it's not. Why you haven't known the one now? Why you guys gonna hear me say that so many times? I was like, what the hell do you mean when you said three is too many? Like just say daddy was having fun. That's called content. It was just a bit. It was just a bit.

It was all just a bit. If you have four, I have to assume that you're just, you're okay with imperfection at all times. Nothing is going to be going fully according to plan. It's just like as long as the important stuff gets checked off, then we're good. Yes. Take a head count at the end of the day. It it comes up four, then you've done your job. Yeah, that's there.

You can't, you can't, that's the fascinating part of it though, because you do not, like you go into every day unscripted. Oh yeah. And they write the script. Yeah. And then it's up to you to, if you change the script, edit the script or just let it play out.

And sometimes it's fiction, sometimes it's non-fiction, but it's awesome. Yeah, every day is definitely an adventure. So who's your favorite Danette? Oh, it's gotta be Paulie. I'm gonna say Marvin. Oh, yeah. Okay.

Yeah, well he's right here. He's literally. Okay. Yeah. Well, he's right here. He's. Oh, he's literally right there. Yeah. If he wasn't here, I'd say, Seaton. Oh, yeah. Seaton's kind of the, yeah, he's kind of the wild card. The guy that, you know, might not give you, because Paul, he does, you know, he's like a laboratory. I'll give you the love. Yeah. Seaton no give me shit. Seat no keep me honest. Seat no keep me company at the bar. Yeah, I probably, I probably say him. Also, Pauli will just try to get you to go to Vermont like every weekend.

Yeah, we're Rhode Island. Yeah, we're grilling again this weekend. I don't know how many times Paul texted me being like plot a land in Vermont. It's like, I'm not moving to Vermont. It does look awesome in the summer time. Oh, he has the best set up. He is the best. I will say Fritsie is one of the most fascinating people who do this. There's nobody like Todd Frits in doing this. He books our guests, but he's he's a fascinating person. It's some good and some bad,

but there's nobody like him. There's a cramer from Seinfeld feel to him. He just truly is a unique character. You can't make it up. He wants to be a stand-up comedian, but he doesn't want you to help him be a stand. He, I said, I'll get Sandler and Spade to write some stuff for you. And he'd rather bomb with his own stuff.

I respect that. Then, then take from Sandler and Dave spade and be successful. Hopefully he's not too much like Kramer with a standout material. That would be a bad look for your show. No, not. Yeah, he doesn't go blue when he's up there. He I love when you and Fritz he get but heads that's some of my favorite moments from your show because it is he's he's very defiant and it's very fun to watch. It can be. My wife says you don't hear yourself and I said, oh, I do. I do.

But but I can look back and kind of cringe because I, I get angry sometimes with him. I told him, I said, look, I love you, but I don't always like you. That's good. That's good saying. Yeah. And he knows that, but, but he is truly a unique, unique character. Every single day, it's something different different fascinating. So I want to plug your book again. You should check it out. The occasionally accurate anels of football. You can find it everywhere, literally everywhere. This book is going to be everywhere you look. You had Adam Sandler write the forward for it. Yeah. Did he actually write it? Did you, did you like send him an email that he

write back to you or did he have his friend write it for you? No, he said, I ask him in person, and I said, will you write the forward? He said, well, what do I write? I said, whatever you feel. And he said, you know, I'm a Jets fan. I said, write about the Jets. And he did. It's all about the Jets and how he grew up,

hating Tom Brady. And so he just gave you what his thought. I said, doesn't have to be about anything. Just write it. I don't care. And he said, okay, he goes, I don't know what a forward is, but I'll write it. And so, I have to do it. It seems like just a great dude.

I read a story about him. This was when Uncut James was coming out. And the Jams. He is. He was awesome when he was on the show like I felt like I was his best friend after 45 minutes with him but yeah when that movie came out there was an article somebody wrote about him that was just interviewing all of his friends like everybody that's known the guy and they all stay on the table say like he is the best person in the world maybe so would

you can is he a close personal friend of yours? Yeah, he's become that way, but you know, he's put me in 20 movies. I'm always, so that's 20 years that you're, you see him doing a movie, even though I'm on the set for maybe, you know, four or five days. But he invited me to his daughter's bot mitzvah, and you know, we've, he invited me to his daughter's bot mitzvah and you know, we've he's been

to things family functions of mine and dinner and once you're in with him, you're in forever. Mm-hmm. Once once you're in the family, because I remember doing a movie and then Rob Schneider goes once you're in, you're in. San Manuel usually whenever you want to. And he has, you know, like I said, 20, 20 movies and he writes a cameo for me. And a lot of times he would write a cameo just so I would go to the movie set so we could play basketball. He wanted something to be able to play basketball with. And I didn't care. It's like, I don't, I don't have to stay there for a long period of time.

You just have to go there and remember your lines, have some fun, play some hoops. That's it. What was your best acting performance that you've given? I think it was the movie just go with it with Jennifer Aniston and Nicole Kidman and Dave Matthews, where I play a nightclub owner. And they do this competitive dance and I just get to ad lib and say whatever. At one point I called this large woman big country and I didn't know if sandman would

let me keep it in, but he was like, Danny, just ad lib, just have fun. Dave Matthews was in the scene as well. But Aniston and Kidman, it was funny when they, when each realized that I had no idea what I was doing. Because Kidman is, she's real. She's, that's a, she's actress. She's all actress. Aniston, you know, kind of fun and goofy,

but really comedic timing was wonderful. But there was a time when I, the script is, yeah, you come on and then you ad lib and get the contest going. So I came on and then I introduced people and then I stopped and sandlers out in the, you know, with the camera people and he yells out in front of everybody. Danny, got a fucking ad lib and you could see Aniston and Kidman are staring at me like holy shit. So Sandman comes up on stage. I said, look man, don't let them figure out that I don't know what I'm doing until later, okay? And then he goes, so to his credit, he says out loud, Danny, that's my fault. That's my fault. I should have written that down.

And I go, yeah, yeah. And then he went back out and I'm going holy shit. So Aniston kept saying, you're the sports guy, right? And I go, yeah, she goes, so you're not an actor? I said, well, I'm a performer. And then Nicole Kidman wanted nothing to do with me. Not that there was anything to do with me, but you went to this room where you kind of sit in between scenes. And I thought if I ever get stuck with, you know, Nicole Kidman, I got to have something

to talk to you about. And my daughter goes, I'm born on the same day as her daughter is. Okay. That's a good connection. Okay. I got it. I'm in this room with sailors Bulldog. It's just me. We're watching TV. Hitman walks in and it's one of those where you walk in the room and then you can't turn around right away because then it looks like you didn't want to go in and talk to this person. So she door opens and I look back and then she looks over and she's like, oh.

So she goes and sits on the couch. Once again, we're in the same scene. There's no dialogue. I'm playing with Sandler's Bulldog. And then all of a sudden I go, um, my daughter is born on the same day as your daughter. She said, she said, oh, great. She got up and left. Well, her husband shows up, Keith Urban, and it's talking my ear off. So she's looking at her, like Keith was talking about the Titans. What do I think of the Tennessee type? Couldn't have been more involved in sports,

but she's now looking at like, I don't know who you are, but my husband knows me, but Nicole and I, it wasn't magic. Yeah, yeah. I get uncomfortable when she comes on screen introducing me to an AMC theater. She's like the magic of cinema.

We're feeling bad, can feel so good. I'm like, please don't talk to me. I'm intimidated by you. It bothers me when I see her on screen. It brings back bad memories because I think it God damn. She's serious. She's really, she's a very serious actor. And those people usually aren't welcomed on Sandler movie sets. Yes. People are very serious. Yes. But Brooklyn Decker was in that movie as well. Oh, I love her. Yes. Big fan of hers.

A lot of fun. A lot of fun. Yeah. All right. So I have one last question. This has been great. Everyone do go by the occasionally accurate annals of football. It's a great book, great book title.

My last question is a rowback question, R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com, promo code take, Q-Zips, Polo's hoodies, joggers, shorts, everything at rowback dot com, promo code take 20% off when you go to rowback dot com and use promo code take. We are on the precipice of the 2023 NFL season. Give us a chance to get some gear though. Oh, we can get you gear. No problem. No problem. I mean, if you want, no, we got you. We got you. You actually is large. Can Marvin write this down real quick? If you want to give Marvin, all right. So if you tell Marvin, if you go to rowback.com and use promo code taking, get all the gear you want. Oh, okay. that's nice.

Yeah, it's a friend's family. Yeah, exactly, that's just for you. That's a personal discount. So 20% off for just me. Yes, awesome. We'll delete this part from the show. We don't want our audience here. Yes.

Put it low back on business. Yeah. But we have in wings again, are you sure you go to ogis? Wojis, yeah, I love that place. We just moved to Chicago though. So we're out of, yeah, we gotta place here though for you. We also gotta take you, maybe we do a trip to wing nuts.

We found the best wings in the world in Buffalo. Literally the best wings in the world. And they're in Buffalo? Yes, they are the best. It's actually worth it to take it, like if you ever have something that like, oh, maybe I should go to Buffalo for something to be like, yeah, I'm going to go because I want to try these wings. So wing nuts, wing nuts, they're that good.

Also, you moved out of this city. Yeah, no longer in New York. We're in Chicago though, a difference. We got a better, we got a great wing place here too when you get here. And we're going to have a full basketball court in our new office. So you're going to have to come hoop with us. Well, we invited you guys here for an ass kicking and nobody showed up.

I don't think you fired Mick Loveon like right after that. So I feel like that's what I'm doing. I would all bring Mick Loveon back to play hoops. I play with him. I used to play with him every Saturday morning. Oh, I heard. I know his game.

Marvin can play. Marvin knows what he's doing. Okay. Mick Loveon is in time, and I do love him. I say this in an endearing way. All time, uh, shoot, shoot to shot and says off or short. And it's a swish and drives you insane. Where he's like, all that short and then it's just a perfect swish. He played a little bit at Dartmouth. Yeah. The junior varsity. Yeah. Yeah. Ever heard of some game. All right. So,

rollback question. Give me the spiciest, your spiciest NFL take going into the season. My spiciest one is, oh, I just did this the other day. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. We're getting. We're getting hold on. This is rehab. Put in the microwave. We're going to reheat it on. This is rehab put in the microwave. We're gonna reheat it. Reheated spices.

Okay. Okay. Um, Mike White. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Will win more games for the dolphins than two at Tongue of ILO. That's me. That's me.

I hope to a listen to this. And I hope that I hope he calls you out. You're on a list now. You in. I'm a member of two calls you out. You're on a list now. You and I'm I'm a member of two and on you are now I didn't say that he looks thick or they looks like a stripper at on X You you're you're in trouble for this take no, I'm rooting for him Doesn't sound like it. I You know what I'll I'll take that back. Okay, there we go. That's mighty comes out of

Okay, I like it. I like it. And he comes out of retirement to play for the Jets. Yeah. Okay. That's a great one. That's what I said. Give me your, give me your hot take here. Just you can do it real quick. Jack Prescott retires from throwing too many interceptions. That's good. Yeah, this year he throws so many interceptions in the first month of the season. He's like, I can't, I'm so bad at football. I'm retiring. You're going to be on his list and I'm going to let him know that I'm already on tax.

I'm already on tax. That doesn't know where he's. Don't you worry. That's got a long list. We've been on that list. I think Philip Rivers is going to come back. He almost came back last year. Did you hear that with Kyle Shanahan?

Yeah. He Kyle should have said that because not all of you thinking. Not all of them thinking about how awesome that would have been if Phillip Rivers played in the Super Bowl. That would have been a great story. I'm sorry to pry. My arm is stronger than Phillip Rivers. Yeah, yeah, that's true.

It is. I actually think this is the year for Kirk cousins I think he wins one maybe two playoff games. I'm back in on him. I'm like a pendulum with Kirk Where now I feel like I've undervalued him and underappreciated him for so long and I saw him on that show quarterback And he's just the nicest person in the world where now I feel bad rooting against him. So now I'm him on that show quarterback and he just the nicest person in the world. Where now I feel bad rooting against him. So now I'm back on the side. Are you okay with the mustache? That's a preseason thing. I think it's just a preseason thing.

We think it's like him having fun with the boys in the locker room. They're like, look, look what I did to my mustache. Isn't that crazy? And he's going to be clean up a week one. Yeah. There's just a prank. He does strike me as somebody like, Hey, isn't this a wild shirt I have on? And you know, it'll be like a plaid shirt that leave it to be, or were like, boy, that

is wild, Kirk. But I do think I think that show did soften people's like criticism of him, because they were like, man, he's just like us. He's an everyday normal guy. But it feels like no matter what he does, it'll be one 13 games last year. Yeah. Yeah. But it's never good enough. It's never never good. Yeah, I know. Good, never good enough with Kirk D. Cousins. Yeah, I just I developed a kind of a hatred form because he was always good enough on the red skins at the time to be better than average,

give you hope and then not good enough to fulfill that hope that you got. But then I realized that was more about me, less about him, and he was also just really good at getting paid. He's probably him and Chase Daniel, the best two quarterbacks at getting paid. He's timed everything out perfectly when it comes to like the franchise tag.

He got that twice got guaranteed money Got more guaranteed money now. He's gonna get more guaranteed money after this season. So I mean more power to him I can't be mad at him if I met if you're mad at Kirk cousins. You really mad at yourself. You mad at the system Why didn't they go for Traylant? With a lot of money he probably stinks. Well his dad's gonna retire. Yeah, so they need some. Well, his DAX can retire. Yeah, so they need some. Oh, that's right. Yeah. About four. Yeah, but treelands isn't better than

Cooper rush. Uh, I don't know. You think, well, I guess it's a project. I guess they're trying to do. I don't know. And can you be a busted 23? Yes. 100%. Billy football. Uh, to mark this was a busted 23, right. 100%. Billy football. Do you want this was a busted 23, right? We knew by then.

We might have known sooner than that. Yeah, man. Zalcon was, right? Like 23 was, yeah, you can, I guess, I guess Traylantz is not the age. It's, can you be a bust without playing? Because he hasn't played. So that, that would be the better question. I think probably not. He's probably can't, he gets another shot to be officially a bust. But if you're 23, if, if he was taken third overall, but you didn't trade all those first round picks for him, definitely, definitely is he, yeah, because some guys, like I remember a killi Smith played for the Bengals. He went number two overall.

Nobody ever brings him up as a bus, but they'll bring up Ryan Leap just because Peyton Manning is one of the greatest quarterbacks of all time. Sometimes like Greg Odin and Kevin Durant. Mr. Miskie and Patrick Mahomes. Like that's the way where you get who you get drafted around definitely affects how people think of you for better or worse. Well, thanks for thinking of me, Segway, to let you guys say goodbye. Yeah.

Oh, no, we're not done. We're just this is the intermission. This half of the intermission. Oh, yeah. We got another hour. Well, Dan, are you guys allowed to drink on the air? Yeah, technically, but we learned pretty early on that being drunk while podcasting, not that funny. It's one of those things that if you do the drunk thing,

like three or four times a year, or sometimes we'll do episodes part of my bake where we'll get really, really high, that's funny. But if you do it all the time, people are like, well, I don't really wanna listen to the drunk guy. So it's sparingly. Hey, hungover episodes are sometimes our best episodes. That's true. But you can't do those every time. Yeah. Because nobody what no one wants to listen

to a drunk person at 7 a.m. where they're on a train on the way into work. You know, right? Well we were thinking about drinking when we were in Ireland. And I it was two in the afternoon till five in the afternoon was our time slot. And I thought, I don't know if we're gonna be any good. It'd be funny with, you know, Fritzy doesn't drink and Marvin doesn't drink, but Seaton and I are experienced

and Paulie's kind of sneaky, but sometimes it makes you wonder how funny you think you are when you are drunk to then go, when I subject my audience to something like that, where we're, you know, doing shots and having Guinness. Yeah, not as funny as you think, I think is the answer. Well, didn't Echersley stop drinking because he saw a video of himself when he was drunk and then that sobered him up that he never had a drink after this. That's self-awareness. Yeah, yeah, probably would have been fun to do it one time in Ireland, you know.

Yeah, yeah. Well, maybe next year when we go back, we'll do that. Okay. Well, thank you, Dan. Always great having you on. I really love having you be a guest of this show. And good luck with the next four years. Four years forever to get their gifts ready. It is the most you've sucked your own dick so hard

that you're gonna do a four year retirement. Yeah. Oh my God. So it's 20% off. Yeah, rowback.com. Yeah. Okay, okay. Just make sure you got that. Special Marvin, you got that there? Okay. Marvin's not gonna use it just here. Yeah, just make sure you got that special special Marvin you got that there. Okay.

Marvita use it just yeah, just you know, no, no, no, don't tie next thing. You know, we're going to get a text from Roeback and they're going to be like, why are all these people in Connecticut buying it? And then we got a problem. So all right, well, good luck with my anals and thank you again guys and great to talk to you again. All right. Thanks, Dan. And thank you again, guys. And a great to talk to you again. All right. Thanks, Dan. Dan Patrick was brought to you by Paramount Plus.

That's right. Paramount Plus again, because they really want to remind you guys that you need to have Paramount Plus if you want to watch NFL this season. It's football season. Go to paramountplus.com slash NFL. Get the exclusive offer. It's just for PMT fans.

50% off the annual price. You get a whole year of Paramount Plus That's just 250 a month to stream all the best games two dollars 50 cents a month That's crazy low you stream all the best games you get the best moments from every single live local NFL and CBS game this season That means regular season that means you get playoff games that means you get the soup. You get the Super Bowl because Paramount Plus is the streaming destination for Super Bowl 58 250 a month plus you get all the other stuff that comes along with it. You get 24-7 NFL content all week long not just the games You get CBS sports HQ fantasy football NFL slime time and more just two dollars 50 cents50 a month. Check it out right now. Paramount plus paramount plus dot com slash NFL paramount plus dot com slash NFL save 50% at home on the go get all the action this season from the NFL and CBS plus all the other stuff that

they're tossing in. The annual plan only offers ends 920 terms and conditions apply. Great cameo by Josh on the Paramount Plus. Great cameo, our guy Josh Allen. Love Josh Allen. Love him so, so much. Uh, Channel Paramount Plus. They're a life saver for me. So many good kid shows on there too.

Uh, okay. We're going to, before we do Fire Fest, we did have an assignment for our darling Jake. And that was to watch the interview of Larry Sinclair's name. The man who claims that he had sex with Barack Obama who went on Tucker Carlson, this started if you missed the episode. Jason Whitlock had a Twitter space. Title doesn't matter if Obama is gay. We made Jake join the Twitter space and send us the notes. These are the pressing issues. So this is a follow-up

Jake, you have your PowerPoint ready. Yes, I do. Okay, everyone subscribe to YouTube. Yeah, you can follow along. How close are we to a half a millie? 50,000. Okay, let's get some subscriptions going over closer. Oh, Meeves is looking mean at hand right now 17,000 you were way off Hank apologize to me. Sorry memes. Okay Jake. Let's do it. Let's get give it to us. Yes. Welcome to sucks Obama the Larry Sinclair story now Jake did you watch the whole video? Yes, okay? How long was it? It was 41 minutes Where'd you think like it was not the. Okay. How long was it? It was 41 minutes. What did you think? It was it. Not the facts, your personal opinion of the broadcast. It was ridiculous. I'll say that, well, no, yeah, you shouldn't be opinionating

on this, right? Well, yes, what I thought. Okay, all right, but yeah. It is a test. What you're about to see until the last slide is all facts. It's straight facts, okay. Well, facts according to this. Yeah, according to Larry Stinclair.

Okay, all right. The Tucker set is awesome. I think it looks very like. Do you think it's a green screen or a real? No, I think it's real. I think it's in Maine. He looks like Ron Swanson hosting a show. Yeah, I think he built that table himself.

I was staring at the creek a lot in the back. Okay, before we get started, let's set the stage. What is going on? Isn't this a sports podcast? If you're joining us for the first time, it is, but you guys asked me to do this. Yes. Why? This feels like you're just trying to... No idea. I was actually very confused on what was going on, so that's helpful. This feels like set the stage. Jake is basically just being like for any future employer, look at the first slide. I was coerced into doing this. Yeah, okay. No, because I do what you guys say unless it's the round.

That would be great if Jake went on Tucker and was like the tell all of part in my take. They made me do tip. They made me do tip. They made me do hot dogs in an hour. I mean, I had to dress up like a woman and they made me search the depths of hell to see if Obama's gay. Yeah. So who's Larry Sinclair?

He counter-Beraco mom and he's going to like- Oh, wait, wait, allegedly. Allegedly. Allegedly. search the depths of hell to see if Obama's gay. Yeah. So who is Larry Sinclair? He encountered Barack Obama in the oil. Oh, wait, wait, allegedly. Allegedly. Come on, all these allegedly. Allegedly. Allegedly. Allegedly used cocaine with him. Yeah, and he currently lives in Mexico. Huh, okay. Okay.

All right, we're setting the stage for how they met. So he was in Chicago. This is all legit. Allegedly, which is Obama's home state of Illinois in 1999 for his Godson's graduation. Larry had that's already feels bullshit. That he was here. No, for Godson's graduation. Yeah. Oh, he said pretty much my Godson during the year. Oh, it's fallin' apart. It's fallin' apart. I don't believe this guy. That literally should have been the end of the interview. Like, what do you mean pretty much in Godson? He said pretty much your basically. I don't know if guy. That literally should have been the end of the interview. What do you mean pretty much in God's Son?

He said pretty much, you're basically... I don't know that much about God's Son, but I'm sure that there's a hard and fast line as to whether or not somebody is your actual God's Son. If you're硬 to take, it's a God brother. He does, he is a God brother. If you have a God's Son, that means that if something happens to parents, then you have to take over that child. Correct. So there's no pretty much.

There's no pretty much. If you were in fact, their godparent, then the real parents would be very upset to hear you say this feels already bullshit. Okay. So Larry hired a limo service, asked the driver to do a pretty much God's self graduation. Just for himself to go out and explore Chicago. So we got us. He has duis. Multiple. I mean, so why else would you hire a limo? And why would you get in the cab?

Yeah, so you hired a limo service, the driver pulled up at a bar, and then got out of the limo, there was this guy introduced to him by the limo driver as Barack Obama. So that's interesting, because Obama at the time was a state senator, which by the way,

he only got that position because Dicca decided not to run against him, which Dick regrets to this day. Uh, so he's like Mark Walberg. So this guy, this guy in the limo was like, Oh, you want to see, you want to meet people in Chicago? Let me take you to a bar and introduce you to a state senator. That's the right. Okay.

So that, this is their first interaction. Got it. Uh, there was a whole. Wow. Jake, did you make this slide? Did you look up? Cocaine use yeah, I think that's actually Jake in the thumbnail doing cocaine. Mm-hmm. So they're having a bar and in Sinclair Menchid as cocaine makes you pee a lot. I Didn't but I didn't know yeah, you did oh you did asset. Yeah, I did you did asset. Yeah, I'm going with bits now What turn the corner you ask that question? I I did. You did asset. Yeah, I'm going with bits now. What?

Turn the corner. You asked that question. I did. When we went to the bathroom, and oh, yes, yes, I actually did. Detroit. Yeah. I might have said, wow, this bathroom

like looks like a perfect place to be. And then, and then Jake said, what is cocaine make you do a P-a-lot? I was like, oh, god. Yeah. So, Mary asked asked Obama allegedly, he could use something to wake up. And Obama immediately know what to do.

They left. They then left the bar to get. This is the biggest lie story of all time. They then left it. And left the bar to get cocaine. Obama secured it. Sickened Claire put a line on a CD tried to snort in the limo.

And Obama pulled out a pipe to smoke out of. Larry said some people smoke, some people snort. So Obama then started to crack in front of him. And this is, all right, again, this is a state senator and he meets a random stranger who says man I'm tired and then he's just like, I got you. Wait, let's be fair.

Sicken Claire pulled up in limousine, okay? So it's not like this was some nobody that was flying. You know, Bob was probably like, oh, this guy's legit. Yeah. So, they secured the drugs. Now, we move on to the sex part. Oh, so, step two, will sex happen? Yeah.

So, Claire started rubbing his hand on Obama's thigh to see where it was going. And it went the direction that Larry intended to go. So, Claire says he performed oral sex on Obama in the limbo and he said it definitely wasn't Baroque's first time. That much, a map. How would you know? You just felt certain?

He was really good at getting hit. Yeah. Very comfortable with it. So, well, embrace debate. Is, would you say that Obama's gay if he just got a blowjob? Well, yeah, if you just stayed it like that. If you close your eyes, you're like, maybe the six-year-old guy is actually a blowjob. Well, yeah, if you just stayed it like that. If you close your eyes, you're like, maybe the six-year-old guy's actually a hot chick.

Yeah, okay. All right, so this is what happened on their first night. The next day, Oh, that looks Photoshopped. It is. Okay. I just googled Sinclair Obama. That's so plainly Photoshopped.

Yes. Oh my God. Apparently Obama showed up at Sinclair's hotel room the next day with no warning So that's so plainly photoshopped. Yes. Oh my god. Apparently Obama showed up at Sinclair's hotel room the next day with no warning because he wanted to run it back. You want to get more ahead. Okay. So back to back. You're not going to believe this.

I blew this guy twice. Yeah. Sinclair said that to his friends when he saw Obama in 2004 when he's watching the Democratic convention. Like when we're watching football, we're like, hey, blah, blah, PFT, you're not gonna believe this. Yeah, I believe that guy. Why would he ask for some reciprocation?

Yeah, sure. Good point. Yeah, so that's what happened the next day. Tucker Carlson, you can be critical if you want, but he actually was a very good journalist here. He asked, what was Obama like on crack? Okay. And Sinclair said,

calm, almost you fork, pretty controlled and talkative, but not really saying. I mean, that's just a contradiction to each other. That's a pretty good description of Obama in general. Yeah, but that doesn't, they then said, Tucker was like, kinda like his presidency. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. And that kinda, okay. Yeah. And then, that's not what a person on crack looks like, but yeah, okay. Yeah. It's like, a person on crack looks like, but yeah, okay. Yeah. It's like, Larry St. Clair is like, yeah, the boobs. We're like same.

So, Claire apparently put this whole, what he said on Tucker was apparently on YouTube in 2008. YouTube took it down and he claims that YouTube gave away his account and his Microsoft email to where he said Microsoft gave away access to his email and vacation replies, or busy telling people that he was quote Busy giving blow jobs and I'll get back to you when he's done. That was the auto reply So it's kind of like a ps5 message. Okay, Microsoft gave access to his email and vacation replies were busy saying I'm busy giving blow jobs

That definitely sounds like something like Microsoft would do. Yeah Just a random guy. So let's take his email and joke on him. Jake, I did do some research into this on my own when I found out that this guy was gonna be on Tucker. He said this actually for the first time in 2004. It's a 2004. 2004 is when he said he gave like a big speech at the Washington Post.

And he failed to call it a paragraph, that's it. He failed to call it a paragraph. Also, he's been convicted a couple times for a court. We'll get to that. Okay, all right Also, he's been convicted a couple times before. Oh, you'll support. We'll get to that. Okay. But he did make these statements like in 2004.

Okay. Well, he claims that Microsoft gave away his account and people were, I think it'd be funny if there was a guy that looked exactly like Obama, who was gay and probably had sex with, I don't know, like 500 guys, coast to coast. So there's a bunch of guys across America that think that they had sex with Obama. Yeah. That would be great wrinkle to the sword. Okay.

All right. Now the drum roll, drum roll, the ruric. The ruric. I don't believe him. Okay. All right. Why? Well, as PFT mentioned, he's been in prison in three different states.

He has a specialty in crimes involving the seat. He's okay. He's a serial liar. The record also indicates one of his prison sentences. Jail sentences were 16 years and there's many more details whose criminal background from not gonna waste your time. Okay. 16 years for forgery seems like you were forging something pretty important.

Catch me if you can't. And then our boss, Dave Portnoy, also chimes it on this topic earlier today on Twitter and he's on my side. He doesn't agree with anything he's saying. Yeah, he said, I met Larry Sinclair when I was doing my Tucker thing a couple of weeks ago. I would trust Anna Delvie before I trusted anything. Larry Sinclair said, top to bottom, maybe the least trustworthy human I've ever laid eyes

on. I'd say his story has 0.0% chance of being true. I'm looking at the font there. He definitely used the letter O and then the number zero, which is insane. Maybe that's a good way of like, if Larry's in Claire, or tries to sue Dave, he's like, well, that wasn't, that was never said. That wasn't an actual person.

Yeah, invalid number. That's smart. Yeah, this is, I'm going to say I don't believe him. Thank you, Jake. I do. You know, I do believe the guy. And the end. Well, until. I do. You know, I do believe the guy. And the end. Well, until I'm never doing this again,

a less big cut of PFT asked me. Yeah, no, I was gonna say this is this story. It's not over. I'm sure Jason will walk might have even a Twitter space tonight. If anybody out there has had sex with Barack Obama, please email PMT in turn at barstoolsports.com. Jake will investigate your claims thoroughly. Yes.

So there you have it. Actually, Jake, if somebody actually claims that they had sex with a bomb, you have to interview them. Yeah. Yeah. We should do a special report with Larry Sinclair. Okay.

Okay. Yep. So there you have it. I hope that helps. No, not really. All right. No, no, not your fault. Yeah.

It's just a liar went on TV and said a story. I spent some time putting it all together. It helped in the fact that it confirmed that I did. Well, I guess actually it did help, because I don't have to watch the video now. Yeah. I watched it on two XB2, just for being called. Oh, sorry, my name is in fact.

It's something you got to disclose before the report. Well, I'm saying it now. Little late. Little late. All right, put the M on your side while I'm saying now. Little late. All right, but yeah, I'm on your side. I think it happened. I think Obama was hanging out of the bar. A little bit pulled up and he was like, well, let's be clear. Uh, I want you to give me some head.

Oh, I need some to wake up. And he took him right out of the bar. Damn. But what if he was like, I need some to wake up and Obama just pulled his cock out? Here you go. Here you go. All right, let's finish up the show. We got football this weekend, FireFest the Week Hank.

Yeah, I talked about the Batchup Party last week in a Nashville. Took a lot out of me. I was fighting through this week, very busy week. Couple long days. Yesterday was in the, fighting, fighting through this week, very busy week. Couple long days. Yesterday was in the office late, going through advisors finished and Wonton Don was streaming, trying to get to 500k subscribe was on YouTube. I hopped on. We were just shooting the shit.

One of those situations I kind of, uh, I forgot we were on a live stream, but just wasn't, you know, my brain certainly wasn't on. I was, I was wiped. I was about to go home, but I had hopped in for a minute. We started talking and he told me that cows and bulls are actually the same species in that blue my mind and then everyone was roasting me on the internet for being really stupid. Shit.

Yeah, it's like the bull is the male version of a cow. Yeah, I didn't know that. Yeah, we did. Let's open it up again. All right, thank you. I stand with you. Thank you. I didn't know that. Yeah, we learned something over there. All right, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I'm sorry, idiots.

How many times have you seen bulls and cows hanging out? A lot. Where? I lived in Texas for like 10 years. All right, I guess again, it was dumb. It was a mistake. Not a mistake. I'm just dumb.

Not a mistake. But it was live. And that was the mistake. And I set myself up again. And I'll say you have say if diarrhea wait till hate finds out about roosters and chickens. Yeah, that was the example used that one I knew. Oh, okay, you know, I knew that to fine. We're in something new every day. I'm sure there's people listening that are like wait Bulls are the males and cows Maybe some like 14-year-olds. I don't think so Yeah, I thought there was male and female cows. That's on me max you knew that no, I did not know that I think this is a Group thing thing that it's easy to talk shit after the fact, but I think that's a fun fact that I did not know that.

Okay. Both are like aggressive. cows are... Yeah, because they know you then. They're guys. They know you then. Paul! All right, yeah, no laws.

Yes. All right, thank you there. Some people need to stand up and take a back. I take it back. Okay. Not a firefess at all. Okay, they back. Okay. Not a fire fest at all. Okay. Take it,

strike it from the record. What's your fire fest? Okay. All right, P next year, maybe the golf tournament. But on my way out there, it was, I was on vacation. It was Friday afternoon, so it was the weekend. And I started having a couple cocktails. And one cocktail turned into two, turned into three, turned into four, turned into five on the plane. And how long is the flight? It wasn't that long. It's maybe like three and a half hours, something like, but I was, I was mowing through them. I can drink on a plane. That's where like,

I'm in, I'm in my god moment on a plane. That's where like I'm in I'm in my god moment on a plane I could just suck them down. I'm like Larry Sinclair and so I had a bunch of cocktails and Then I proceeded to brag on on Twitter. I was like not to brag But I think I just set the world record for the amount of cocktails drink on a plane and then I get off the plane get on to my connecting flight to go out to Tato and I realized that I left my wallet on the plane as I'm off the plane, get on to my connecting flight to go out to Tahoe, and I realized that I left my wallet on the plane as I'm in the air on my way to Lake Tahoe. So I had to go to a place with casinos with no ID in my pocket.

Don't still don't have my wallet with me. Don't have my debit card. Don't have any of my IDs. Don't have anything like that. I'm waiting to get it shipped back from the airline, still hasn't arrived, and then I'm getting on another plane tomorrow to fly. And so, yeah, I've just been without, I've been sans wallet for the last week.

You have a passport, though. I do have a passport. So I'll be able to, I mean, thank you for reminding me, I need to pack that tonight. Yes. Because I don't think that they'll let me fly to South Carolina for the pump concert at USC. Plug God.

Plug God. But yeah, I've just been without a wallet. I think we made it like a bad thing for us to plug shit. It's been, God forbid I promote that. No, we've just bullied ourselves into being like, let's never promote anything we're doing. Yeah, but I am going to be at Bojangles playing with Pup Pump on Friday night at 9 p.m. There's a boss, there's a shuttle that's taking people out there.

Come see us, I won't have my wallet though. Well, they'd be serving food during the set. You know, that's a good question. I would imagine that they're gonna have food. It's bow jangles after all. And just for... There'd be people walking in, like just going to get like a number three.

I don't know. I hope it's like that viral video of the Punk band playing in Denys. That's right. That's what I like. Let's fucking go, Denys. Yeah, that's what we're gonna be doing. And just for anyone who's going out there, have a great time, if you're feeling tired at all, PFT will let you suck his dick.

I will, yeah, that's a fact. That's a fact. You guys in the YAC have the kiss coin. I've got the suck dollar. So if you just give me my, I'm gonna do is yawn. If you give me my suck dollar, then it's all your allowed to suck. Well, you have to show up in a limo. Yeah, if you show up in a limo

And you have to have a pretty much godson. Yep. Yeah, all right. My firefist is a pre-fire fest I footballs all the way back and I am Just realizing like how much my Mood and happiness goes along with my teams because I do think the badgers are might be in trouble going to Washington state on Saturday night and then the Bears Packers, we already talked about how significant this feels.

And I was both. I've had that thought my head like, oh yeah, you're a loser. You like, you have a great life, you have a great family, all these things, but yet you still let the outcome of a football game affect how you are going to feel for an entire week. And I had that epiphany this morning and there's nothing I can do

about it. So yeah, if I go on to, it's going to be sad boy season. Never give it up. Come and come in Sunday and Monday. So yeah, yeah, it's a pretty fire fest. Just more of like a, maybe I should try to figure out a way to emotionally be able to handle things better, but I don't think that Imagine how bad the show would be if we emotionally handled things well. No, it would be awful. Yeah. Can you imagine Hank just being able to be like, Well, Patriots aren't very good this season, whatever. I'll just bet on the Cowboys. It would make it so awful if he did that hypothetical It would be like when the heat and the panthers lost in the finals for Jake. Yeah, and he was like Oh, good. I'm gonna run finals for Jake. Yeah, and he was like, oh, oh, oh. Oh, good run, good run. Yeah, see?

See? We saw that. We don't want to be a bull. If the Bears lose the Packers, I'm like, well, I liked a lot of the things that we saw. Yeah. Well, here's the thing. I know I'm a loser for not being a diehard fan,

but I can walk in on Sunday with you guys. No one no matter what, it's gonna be a great day. Oh, see, yeah. That, I truly feel that way. No, but you know what, like Max loses the Super Bowl. He comes on the show and he just, he's got the thousand yard stairs. He looks like he got a ladder.

A lobotomy. It just takes our house. Here we get here. It was great. No, we're asking, we're using you as a great example Max. You're the perfect example for a sad sports fandom. Okay, Jake finishes off. Yeah, the other day I was on my way to the office.

I was taking the bus here, the CTA. I was running to catch the bus, and I strained my quad. Oh, no! Dan, I played the house. Wait, and it hurt a lot. And you don't, can you get the ADA apartment back? Uh, honestly. I mean, you might need it.

No, I'm fine walking. It's just running sometimes. What noise did you make? Running sometimes. How often are you running? to catch the boss and playing time It's impeccable. Okay, so then stop playing tennis and pickle ball. Well, we'll see Also, like if I get an injury that's like I can't run. Oh, no Yeah, nothing in my life. I got fortunately I can't run the 5k

But I'm still gonna show up and support the cause How do you know you might be feeling you might be feeling good by Saturday? Yeah, it might be. By the way, that's gonna be a great PM TV. So Max is gonna run the 5K on Saturday. Maybe I can still run it. Under 33 minutes and he gets five grand for me and five grand. 10 over. For PFT donated to pause. Are you running it?

I gotta help film. Yeah. I gotta help film. I gotta go to Tuscalo. You don't win in Spray and you're like, you just don't wanna run the 5K. Yeah. No. You know, no one has to help them. I gotta go to Tuscalo. You don't win in spray in your lay. You just don't want to run the fire. Yeah No, you know what you got it out. Why you got it out? I'll help with whatever. No, we don't You just said running. I actually do. I actually think you can beat Max every person who runs I know

It's dog's life. I'm running. Oh, there we go. I'm going Just be his head. Yeah, just be his pacer. Okay, I'll run with Max. Yeah, run with Max. Just go like just do the pacing. That would actually be very funny for the video. Don't. If you have the pace and you keep on me, you're like, all right, Max, you gotta put it on.

Just like be his hype guy. Yeah, dude, 33 minutes, like you can walk some of that. I'm gonna walk a lot of it. I can't walk a lot of it. I'm going to go right through that. Positive vibes only. You can walk probably three minutes. Yeah.

If you walk fast, you can do this. A light light jog should be able to do it. I can't jog that long. Okay. Have you trained? Not, I also have stre- I think I might have strep through. What? Dude Max, you can't get a sick at the start of football season.

Everyone's subscribed to the part of my take YouTube. We won't release the max running video until we get to 500,000. And also the golf that's actually happened. We're going to be sitting next to you. Are they coming out, Max? Not. Yeah, golf is next. Okay.

So yeah, we won't release the, we won't release the five K run. What about the rider cup? When is that coming out, Max? The week after until 500,000. Let's get half a million. Everyone subscribe. Everyone subscribe. Everyone subscribe.

What? So many people listen. Subscribe. Yeah, I know. There's someone listening right now. You know what? Watches it and doesn't subscribe. Yeah, you know what?

Lead from the front. You're not subscribed. No, but I'm gonna do it right now. Lead from the front. This is insane. Lead from the front. Here's what we're gonna do. We're definitely subscribed. I don't subscribe. I'm definitely, yeah, not subscribed. No, but I'm gonna do it right now. Lead from the front. Lead from the front. Here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna definitely subscribe to you.

I don't subscribe to anything. No, I'm definitely, yeah, I've been subscribed. I let the algorithm tell me what. No, I'm subscribed. Let's see, pardon my name. I've been subscribed. Yeah, let's go people. Part of my take.

Subscribed. We're 20 K away. We have 40. We have 40. All right, let's go. Also, I lost my blue check mark temporarily. Oh, would you do? We're 20 K away. We have 40. We've subscribed. All right, let's go. Also, I lost my blue check mark temporarily. Oh, what'd you do?

I gave my profile a makeover and they put you through like, you put it in. Yeah, that was a low point for me reading that makeover. A makeover? What? What'd you put in? It was just like new Twitter bio, like new, new profile. Yeah, it's a new, I'm gonna look at it.

All right, yeah. Yeah initial reaction But you like it, but you went from a picture in a suit suit you did you're the dude you're the teacher coming in every day with the same outfit Okay, there's a parcel picture Jake Marsh part of my take podcast play by play broadcaster Q's alum golf pickle ball tennis No football Can we get mr. Positions in there? No, why you are mr. Positions someone recommended plug God. Oh Mr. Positions is better though. No one will know what that means. It's true. Yeah, could mean anything see

Okay, great show boys I mean anything. Okay, great show boys. Can't wait for football. Football's back. Everyone's gonna stream. Sunday will be streaming for the entirety of the first late and second slate. And then we'll be doing boomers on Monday.

Next time you hear us. Oh, numbers numbers. Number three. Here got this memes. 30. No, you have numbers, numbers. Three. You're gotten this, memes? 30. No, one. No, you have never gotten this? 20 memes as one.

Oh, 69. 97. Love you guys. Don't get away. I'm not one. I'm the same. I can't tell you anyway. Today's a hot day, the clock's here

I'm gonna go your love on me, I'm telling you away I'm gonna go your love on me, I'm telling you away I'm here, let's say I'm gonna say it To the beach and the little way So that we can be together I'm here to be, I'm telling you I'm to be I should've said it to you, tell me the day I'm waiting, so let me let you walk into me Take me on to me I shall make you take me to me Take me on to me

Take me on to me Take me on to me Take me on to me Take me on to me Take me on to me Take me on to me Now you are my silhouette I'm a silly girl, I'm a silly girl And now you are my silly girl Don't you know I'm a silly girl

Don't you know I'm a silly girl Don't you know I'm a silly girl And now you are the same I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you

I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you I'm a little more like you I'm a one who's the only one I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only

I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only I'm the only You're the thing on me Oh, you're the thing on me Oh, you're the thing on me

Oh, you're the thing on me You're the thing on me Oh, you're the thing on me I'm sorry.