Pardon My Take - Dr. Phil, Jacoby Brissett, Mt Rushmore Of Area 51 Raiders And Meats

Episode Date: July 17, 2019

Big Cat's Jury Duty, Madden Ratings, and Old face apps, yeah it's the dog days of summer (2:38 - 8:04). Mt Rushmore of Athletes you'd want on your side when you storm Area 51 (8:41 - 17:28) and in honor of National Hot Dog Day, Mt Rushmore of meats (17:28 - 24:11). Hot Seat/Cool Throne including Cup Snakes at Wrigley and Blake Koepka (24:11 - 37:53). Dr Phil joins the show to diagnose what exactly is wrong with us, if he's happy, and when does being a fan of a sports team become problematic (37:53 - 74:02). Colts QB Jacoby Brissett joins the show to ask some questions that we never knew needed to be asked and start a new online club with an NFL QB (74:02 - 89:11). Bachelorette talk for guys that don't watch the bachelorette, Thoughts and Prayers Big Baller Brand, Take Quake, and Guys on Chicks. You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we have two guests and two Mount Rush Moors. Yeah, we're in the dog days of summer, but that doesn't mean we're not going to keep producing great shows for you. We have Dr. Phil, we have Jacoby Berset, who has gone crazy on Twitter, but we also may have started a new club with him, and we have the Mount Rush Moor of athletes you'd like

to storm Area 51 with, and the Mount Rush Moor of meats. So pack show, guys on chicks as well, hot seat, cool throne, the regular Wednesday stuff. We're ready to go, we're ready to roll, but before we do all that, pardon my take is brought to you by the Cash App, the number one finance app in the App Store. Cash App is the most powerful way to send, to spend and save. It's connected to the free cash card, the only debit card with boost. You select a boost in your cash app, then instantly save at some of your favorite places like 10% Chipotle or $1 off at all coffee shops.

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Today is Wednesday, July 17th and I have jury duty. Because right now, you are currently in a Brooklyn jury pool, bring your floaties. I figured this would be something very easy to get out of. Dude, I've done it. I've already got, so I skipped it the first time, then the second time they sent me a notice and I went and I said, hey, it's football season. They're like, hey, we get it, you're a football guy that looked me up and down and I said, why don't you come back?

When's a good time? I was like, how about after the Super Bowl? I skipped that time by accident and then now we're on the fourth time, I feel like I'm fucked. You just need to show up wearing a blue lives matter t-shirt because then they'll just kick you off the jury, right? You can't sympathize with law enforcement, you can't sympathize, either go as a cop or go as a criminal.

Go drunk, wear rollerblades. There's different things I've been thinking about doing. Blading would be good. What if I just went and played YouTube videos loud with no headphones in the whole time and when they asked me questions, they'd be like, hold on one sec, I just want to finish this prank real quick. Can't you just say that you're very religious and judge not lest you be judged? That's true.

That's true. It's against my religion to be a juror. How about we have to do interviews and we have to produce content for the people? Yeah, just be like, listen judge, Madden ratings just came out. I have to pour through all of these and analyze which players were snubbed and which players should feel good about themselves, they'll understand. So that is the big story that's going on, not my jury duty, but Madden ratings because we are in the throes of the dog days of summer and people are mad about Madden ratings so

much so. Do you see DeMarcus Lauren Lawrence who just signed, I think $65 million, he got guaranteed. I wouldn't give a fuck at that point. Would not give a fuck, but he said, you're not going to disrespect me and get away with it. So he's coming at the video game developers to Madden and Trebisky was ranked the 20th quarterback with a rating of 75. That's okay.

Pat Mahomes number one. I think so. I think there was a few people who got 99s. I think it was DeAndre Hopkins, Khalil Mack, Aaron Donald, Aaron Donald got a 99. There was one other person who got a 99, but who cares? It's the ultimate who cares July story. Madden ratings. Yeah.

As somebody that hasn't played Madden since they lost me when they did the passing vision. I couldn't get back into it after that. Very tough. Yeah. So when the real gamers showed up. Exactly. Not to brag. I still Madden for about a week a year.

I buy it. I do a season. I turn it off every time I'm about to lose. And then yeah, I just forget about it after that. Yeah. Once they started doing the live games where they put you in a lobby and then you'd hear like 12 year old white kids call you the inward. At that point, I was like, I think, I think this is really past me.

Yeah. I'm not part of the school tour anymore. Yeah. So Madden ratings. If you want to know what's buzzing, Madden ratings and old face pictures, I mean, two hot topics right now. Hot topics. Old face stuff.

I'm I'm very interested to see can they do videos on that now or is it just limited to the pictures? Because what I want to do, I want to take the snap face baby picture app, the baby picture filter, do Stephen A. Smith and then put the old face on that and see if it turns young Stephen A. Smith into present day Stephen A. Smith. Oh, little time traveling. Yeah. I don't like the old faces because I just I see it like someone old face me and like

that's probably me in like four years. I just looked at the rate of aging that I'm doing. I was like, yeah, that's me. I'm old. Yeah. I'm old right now. I'm going to be that old soon. Somebody showed me their picture today and I was like, wow, that's that's pretty good.

That's a pretty good old face. And it was the picture before they put the filter on. Oh, yikes. Yikes. Not great. Yeah. So a lot, a lot of buzz. But we have a big show for you because we have two Mount Rushmore's and two interviews.

So what's better than that? Okay. I wonder if you can put the old face on Mount Rushmore on like the stone carvings. Oh, make them even older. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Can you do old face with dogs? No, you don't want to do that.

You don't want to do that. You could do it with Jesus. We always talk about Jesus as the ultimate what could have been guy if you didn't get injured. Maybe you could see what 60 year old Jesus would look like once he got problematic and then catch up with technology canceled on Twitter. What about Mbappe? That probably he's probably impervious to the old face.

It's always 19. He doesn't compute. Yeah, we'll never grow old. He's Peter Pan. Yeah. All right. Should we do the Mount Rushmore's? Let's just hop right into it.

Let's jump right into it. The thing we will promise you on this show is we're not going to create content out of we're not going to squeeze blood from a rock. No, we did the Madden Rings, we did the jury duty, and we did the old face. We're going to do Hot Sea Cool Throne. We're going to do- Actually, you know what? There was a big story today.

Oh, yeah? Blake of the Year runner up, Brooks Kepka. Oh, yes. Is ducking Tiger Woods Call. You guys got a chill. That's your Hot Sea Cool Throne. All right. We'll wait.

We'll wait to talk about it. We're going to save it for you, Hank. That's a little teaser. That's a teaser. That's a teaser. Here's another teaser. We're going to take, or barstowgold.com slash PMT. Watch our interview with Dr. Phil.

Watch our interview with Jacobi Berset. In the van. Watch us get contentious on these Mount Rushmore. So what is the order? I believe I start this time. Yes. Because Big Cat went first last time, right? Did I?

I went first last time. Hank went first last time, so I go first this time. No. Because Hank went first the first time, I went first the second. I remember when he thought first. No, but I went second. We should be able to figure this out. Yeah.

I go first. You were in third. Can we just, we need to put it on the wall. Yeah. It always goes this way. Okay, so you go first. I go first on the first one. You just got bullied into it, Hank.

No. I go first on the first one, then you go first on the second. All right, fine. It's either, it's one of these two ways. So if Big Cat went second, then he would go. I go first. Okay, right. Or third.

All right, so Mount Rushmore. First one we're going to do is the Mount Rushmore of athletes you would like to storm, have on your side, storming area 51. So someone tweeted this. They did a terrible job. We're going to do a better job. The only rule is they have to be alive and it can be old athletes, current athletes, whatever.

Still alive though. Time and the Sword is in game. Still alive. All right. My first pick, I'll just take Dennis Robin because he knows he's, he went to North Korea. He can figure out, you know, diplomatic stuff. He will be able to talk to the aliens. That's a good point.

And he would have those aliens kissing our ass by the time he was done with them. Yeah. There's a pretty good chance that the aliens are like 90s Bulls fans. Yes. Just like Kim Jong-un. Yes. They could just be Kim Jong-un in area 51. Who knows?

Who knows? Well, they might not be 90s Bulls. Do you think they have TV in area 51? Yeah. For sure. They can watch everything. Probably live. Okay.

Anytime. So Dennis Robin. That wouldn't be a bad gig if you were an alien. You crash land on a planet and they just give you like Red Zone, TV, snacks. Pretty good deal. Pretty good life. Pretty good deal. All right.

PFT, you're up. All right. My first one, Bill Walton. Ooh. Bill Walton would be a trip. Not only would he be so excited to meet the aliens, he'd probably just have him eating out of the palm of his hand. He'd probably get along real well.

The injury can start. Yeah. Are you worried about him getting to like, if you're storming area 51? Not at all. Not at all. And also they might not have his chair. Nobody's going to shoot Bill Walton. He's going to storm it with his chair.

He might be the first one shocked. He's so tall. Yeah. He's like, who is the guy in the Bond video game? The Ajab. No. No. The other Jaws.

Jaws. You're thinking he's like Jaws? Yeah. Well, then bonus for me because they're targeting him and not me. True. Good point. All right, Hank. Okay.

Kevin Garnett. Okay. Pull up with the Uzi. M16s. Couple of joints. All of them. Okay. Okay.

He would just go ham. My second one, I guess I'll go with Sam Cassell. Ooh. Just because, you know, maybe if there is any type of like, maybe these guys are like us, they'll see Sam Cassell and be like, all right, that's an ally. Very good call. Yeah. I said that on the last show.

Yeah. But good job, Hank. I know I like that. Yeah. Use what you got. You should have picked it. You're the first person to say Sam Cassell looks like an alien. Yes.

I literally said when they're storming area 51, they should have Sam Cassell under a tarp, like that's seen in Independence Day where Will Smith shows them, should I leave this here with you guys and just be on my way and they let him in? No, I think. Do you have him on your list? Yeah. You had him on your list? I did.

Let me see your list. No. I'm not going to let you see my list. Exactly. All right. You're going to steal all of them. Go ahead. All right.

My second one is going to be Adam Orson. Ooh. Because he's got all the weapons. He's got the survival bunker. He knows how to get by hard times. He does a good one. Allegedly. All right.

I'm going to go with Usain Bolt because he'll just run past everyone, tough to catch because we're storming area 51. We don't know what's going to happen with the aliens. We got to get in there first. Usain Bolt number one, so I got the speed and then I'll go with some muscle. I'll go with James Harrison. That's good. Always plays, always scary to aliens, humans, whoever may be.

Carbon-based life forms at least. He just shows up with his gray sweatsuit and you know it's on. That's a good pick. Okay. My next one, I'm going to go with Jim Brown. So I don't know if you guys have seen the movie Mars Attacks. He can't even stand. He can barely stand.

Have you seen Mars Attacks? He beats the fuck out of no less than three dozen aliens by himself. But what about today? I'm talking about, I'm going on the track record of success here for Jim Brown. Okay. When it comes to dealing with aliens. Problematic by you. Well, he's, listen, I'm not saying I want to like hang out with Jim Brown.

You endorse Jim Brown. I'm saying, I'm saying that I would like Jim Brown. To beat the fuck out of aliens so they don't beat the fuck out of me. Yeah. You endorse Jim Brown. Hank. What do you got Bobby Hull in there too? My lab too, right?

Yeah. I will go with C.T. from the challenge. Oh, good athlete. He's not, he's not going to go down until he takes out as many as he can. Good athlete. He will go out fighting. Hell yes. And then my last one, I guess I'm going to go with Kyle Long because I feel like he's

woke like he's kind of, he probably knows some things about Area 51's that like the regular folk might not. And he's just a beast. Yeah. He's good at video games too. So he could be of use when it comes to like shooting lasers and different weapons. Yeah. Or like you take over like a ship and it's like, what do we do in the ship?

And he's like, I know, like, I've got this, I've played Microsoft Flight Simulator. That's good. I can fly this UFO. That's good pick. All right. PFT your last pick. My last one's going to be Marshawn. Marshawn Lynch, tough to bring down in any situation would probably just smoke the aliens

out, make them real chill. Yep. Have a little hang sash back there with him. Okay. That's a good pick. I like that. Marshawn Lynch. All right.

My last pick, I'm going to go with and let's not, let's throw out what we recently saw on the beach, but Coach O because there will be a moment where things will get down and be like, I don't know if we can do this and we'll all look to Coach O and he'll get us back up. Yeah. So he'll get us ready to go. What do we got for honorable mentions? I had, I had Saquon on.

That's good. Good. Well, and Domiconsu, Domiconsu step on their crotches. Gronk would be good because you show up and if they're aliens, Gronk will laugh at their jokes and immediately be like, these guys aren't so bad. You know, he's Gronk is a perfect like glue guy that you have around that may he probably start shotgunning beers and, you know, smashing monster energies over. Yeah.

I don't care who you are. If you see Rob Gronkowski stand up on like a couch. If you're in the middle of Area 51 and you're an alien, you see him stand up and just start partying. Yep. And like just bring LMFAO along with him. Yep. And just get a party going in there.

Yep. Tom Brady. I just like to spend some time with him. Okay. Because you'd like to die with Tom Brady. Personal pick. Yeah. I don't hate that.

The personal pick. What about, what about Nick Saban? Because he's might, I think if there's anyone who knows about aliens already, it's Nick Saban. He would try to recruit him. Right. Right. He would have them easily, you know, he'd get him in.

What does he get by everyone? Like a Dodge Viper? He buy him a Dodge Viper. Or a Mercedes dealership. Oh yeah. That's right. That's right. No one cares about, you know, uncovering that.

But yeah, the Mercedes dealership, you'd get him probably like a, you know, three down line men on the defensive line ready to go. We should just storm, like we should storm Alabama's weightlifting facility and see what's really going on there. See what's going on there. But point of order, Nick Saban, I don't think he's an athlete. He did play college. Did he not?

I'm pretty sure he did. Oh yeah. Plumbers. I mean, if CT's on there. I mean, he was one of the. CT is an elite athlete. Oh, I know he is. He did play college in like the fifties.

He was like, he was like a five foot eight defensive. Yeah. Yeah. For like a max school. Yeah. Um, what about Charles Barkley? Another guy who everyone loves Charles Barkley. Just to hang out with.

Yeah. I'd put him in like Hank's bucket where it'd be cool to hang out with Charles Barkley if I was going to die anyways. Right. Right. He'd probably crack a good couple of jokes right before the alien skull fuxion. Yeah. Uh, Sammy Watkins.

He's been talking about the spaceship coming back. Yep. He'd probably be in tune with those guys. Uh, Shaq. Okay. But again, that is a major case of Jaws. Yeah. So he's so big.

True. That he would take any bullets. How about this one? How about Jim Harbaugh? Maybe like a little, uh, curb your enthusiasm where he looks at his dad in the eyes and they're like, are you me or am I you? Kind of one of those situations. Uh huh.

I also just think Jim Harbaugh, like he would never lose a fight against an alien. That's right. Yeah. I mean, the original satellite camp was probably the spaceship that brought him down here in the first place. Yeah. Did you see that hilarious video? There was a picture of the Harbaugh's having a kid throwing contest in their pool.

It was great. It was perfect in all ways because it was, uh, I think it was Jim and John and they were throwing the kids up in the air, seeing who could throw the kids to the highest. So you know that that Jim was taking it very, very seriously. And then the perfect addition was, and Jack is on the sidelines judging. So Jack Harbaugh was at the edge of the pool, giving official ratings on which kid went higher. I would have paid so much to be there just so I could be like, Hey, how about throwing

me? And Jim be like, Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. I'll give you a shot. Let's toss you up in the air. Uh, all right. Good. Any, anything else?

Bubba, who do you have? Bubba, do you have a mic? You have a mic that works? Flip the switch, Bubba. This is a momentous occasion. Probably Kyrie. Oh yeah. There we go.

Bad teammate though. Or the, uh, the, the Baylor guy who was the main. Oh, Sean. The super Jack guy. Well, he's also problematic. Although he was. No. Was he exonerated?

Yeah. Yeah. I'm pretty sure he might have been. I'm pretty sure he might have been. All right. That's a really definitive statement by me. Um, all right. Let's do our second Mount Rushmore.

This one is the Mount Rushmore of meats because hot dog, national hot dog day is today. And it's brought to you by Kingsford charcoals, the taste of the game featuring 30 regional dishes inspired by the team, cities and flavors of major league baseball. So today, today we're talking Mount Rushmore of, uh, meats, BBQ eats, favorite food items thrown the charcoal grill. Okay. My first one. This is easy.

Wings. Buffalo wings. Whoa. Okay. Yeah. You had to take. And specifically like the top meat on a nice drum. The top meat that everybody forgets, that's how you can separate the amateur wing eaters

from the pros. Yup. Hank. I will go with bacon. Whoa. Okay. That's a basic. That one going.

All right. I did not think with pick three, I would get steak. I didn't. It's a value pick. Yeah. Hank is just like, you're one of the epic bacon sriracha guys. That's fine. Yeah.

I just didn't think it. All right. I mean, bacon is great for pretty much any meal. Like any meal you can have for breakfast. It's great. If you have it with lunch on a burger, it's great. If you have it on dinner for some side, it's great. Okay.

So I'll take. Not many meats that versatile. I'll take. Steak. And sausage. Okay. Those are my two picks. Yeah.

Sausage is good. The only one with sausage is sometimes it needs something to go along with it. Almost always. Yeah. Okay. My number two, I will go with Kobe beef. Oh, okay. I had this.

I went to a steak. Yeah. But it's different. I went to like a Japanese barbecue. Climbing down. It's like, it's meat you put on the, on the grill for like 10 seconds. It's meat that melts. It melts.

It's teammates under the bus. Yeah. Also Kobe beef. Problematic. Very problematic. Yeah. The most problematic beef. Kobe beef is one of those things that's gotten thrown around a lot recently where it first

came out. It was like, oh, it actually meant something. Now it's like, you can just slap the label Kobe on anything. Right. Right. New tele beef. Right. You guys are haters.

Whoa. Oh, okay. Bacon and Kobe beef. Yeah. Hank. I'm just predicting you're going to get buried in this one. As the guy who did the, as the guy who complained that sitting, the reclining was like laying down.

I could make the argument that Kobe beef is steak. It could be. They also, I mean, Kobe beef is the cow. No, steak is steak. Kobe beef is beef. I'm talking the whole cow. I bought the whole fucking cow. Steak.

I mean, for a Mount Rushmore meats, that's pretty. Oh, I just go forever. I got a lot of meats. You done, Hank? Are you done criticizing my hands? Nope. Okay. Not at all.

All right. My next one. Hey, gentlemen's game. My next one is going to be a fish that you caught with your bare hands. Yes. Because they always taste better if you grab them yourself out of the river when they're swimming downstream. Dude, how about that guy who tweeted me a picture being like, Hey, my dad caught a fish

with bare hands. That thing was dead. He just fucking grabbed a dead fish that was just floating on the top of the water. I mean, people, the internet was pouring in with support for me, telling me how easy it would be. So shout out to you guys. Okay. Okay.

And then I got one more. I also, a guy from Alaska hit me up. I was like, if you come out, we can do it. So, you know, if you need me to take another vacation, I could go out there and make it happen. I will allow that. Truly don't believe me. I will allow that.

But you can only be in Alaska for one day. But days are like three days there. True. One time a year ago. Good point. Yeah. The land of the midnight sun. You can land, stay for a day, stay until the sun goes down.

Fine. I don't care. He can just go forever. So we'll lose Hank. Yeah. That was a part of the deal. It'll be like into the wild. Yeah.

Hank will end up in the back of a school bus. My last one is going, I don't know what to choose here. No, you have two more, but you have one right now. Okay. Yeah. So my second to last one, as I was saying, is going to be, I'm going to ribs. Good pick. Ribs is a great thing.

Really? Yeah. Ribs is incredible. It's a wonderful pick. You can do so much. They're so versatile. Nothing like a nice crispy rib with the sauce just dripping off it, falling off the bone. Ribs.

Okay. Ribs. Ribs. I'll go with brisket. Oh, Hank. Okay. You like those burn ends? I knew you did.

All right. My last pick. I'll go with human liver with some father beans and a nice candy. Put that on there. It's Jake. Put that on there. Benjamin Ratsbell, a fledgling killer's first flight. Go ahead.

I will go with the meetup for tickets before the big game. Oh, the meetup. The meetup. Okay. There we go. Hey. Hey. There we go.

You got it. All right. I'll go with jerky. Just jerky. Just jerky. Any kind? Well, I like beef jerky. Okay.

You know what's really good? The South African Biltong. They're beef jerky. They do a little bit differently in South Africa. Yeah. But you have a basic pick. Yeah. You're right.

Jerky's a real basic pick, Hank. It's wonderful for a road trip. You can eat it on your couch. You can eat it with your hands. You don't have to worry about getting messy with some of these other stuff like ribs. Bacon can get too greasy. You definitely can't eat bacon with your bare hands. True.

You can eat it with a tooth while you eat it. Yeah. No. Not if it's cooked properly. You don't need no teeth to chew that beef. Wait. Did I pick? Did I pick four or three?

I think you did three. You did fava beans and liver. All right. I'll do a hot dog for my third. Yeah. I just only did one pick there. Yeah. Okay.

All right. I'll do hot dogs. Hot dogs. Hot dogs. Three. So hot dogs. My third pick. Human liver with fava beans and the nice Yankees.

Get those nitrates going. That was a great Mount Rush. Lamb. Little veal. Veal scallopini. Wow. No. You want to talk problematic.

Let's talk about veal. Okay. Let's talk. It's just little baby calves. That's okay. And they're delicious. They're good tasting. No one did.

Oh, you did buffalo wings. So I guess that's chicken. What about a little crab or lobster? Does that count? Crab's good. What about spam? Do you guys like spam? Nope.

Spam. Fried spam is delicious. Nope. It is. It's good. Fried chicken. Fried chicken. I love to fry my chicken then just throw it on the grill.

What does that mean, Hank? Spam is on brand for me. This is right up there with like the 100,000 boxes of corn flakes and spam. Are you just calling me poor? You want to make us some spam? I'm just saying it's just, it's very on brand. Spam is not bad. Spam is bad.

No, it's not. Yeah. I'm pretty confident saying spam is bad. Not at all. It's okay. That's a hill I'll die on. It's government meat. It's very cost effective.

Spam and eggs is a delicious breakfast treat. How often do you eat spam? Once or twice a year for special occasions. When was the last time you had spam? I had spam in a breakfast taco not too long ago. I think it was like six months ago, seven months ago. Interesting. Yeah.

I don't believe your spam frequency. Twice a year is not that unbelievable. I don't think you do it twice a year. Okay. Make sure you tweet every time you have spam from here on out. I will. So we know. I'll keep you absolutely informed about that.

All right. That was a contentious two-mile rush. We could. I'm good. I'll hug it out, bitch. No, I'm great. All right. Let's do hot seat cool throw and then let's get some interviews.

My hot seat is pinstripe prestige. Oh, yeah. So last night, newly acquired Yankees, Edwin and Carson Oceone. Fuck. Yeah. He had a home run and a game that they lost. Two home runs. Two home runs.

And the MLB tweeted out that the parrot has earned his pinstripes, but they lost the game and then home runs meant nothing. Yeah. I feel like you have to. And it's fucking July. It is July. He's been on the team for like a week. And it's a game against the race.

Yeah. As one of the members. Who are still paying him. Oh, that's right. So he can't. He's technically a race player. Yeah. He's a carpet bagger.

You can't earn your pinstripes and so you stop getting paid from your former employer. I went back. I just searched in Carson Oceone and pinstripes and just retweeted everyone who said he finally earned his pinstripes. Wait. So good point, Hank. Truly earn his pinstripes. If he was getting paid by the Rangers, he got the new, the new deal.

But did he re-earners his pinstripes after that? I think so. That's because when he won. Yeah. He won in 0.9. All right. Yeah, I think it was 0.9. Okay.

Yeah. All right. I feel like if you're going to earn your pinstripes, it has to be, you have to hit one walk off home run. Right. That's how it works. I would say so. Two home runs in a game, not pinstripes.

Three. If you hit a third. Now you're Mr. October. Yep. Yeah. Or you could just be like Mickey Mantle. And his, when he got a blowjob underneath the stadium stairs, I wonder. Remember when Dark Jeter, like when the, when the World Series went into November and everyone's

like, Mr. November. That sucked. All right. Yeah, that did suck. What's your cool throw? My cool throw was old people faces, but we talked about that. So I'm going to go with Brooks Kepka's chances for the 2020 Blake of the Year competition. Yes.

Blake Bortles has won. Blake Griffin has won. So they're, you know, they're resting on their laurels. They don't, they don't have the drive that they probably once had. Correct. And Brooks Kepka is just, he keeps, keeps it coming with his Blake isms. I guess if you call it. Yeah.

Yeah. Two today. So he had Tiger texted him asking to play a round of golf before the British open. He just ghosted him. So he cares more about the Blake of the Year than he does about Tiger Woods. And then he did an interview where he basically just said, I don't practice for, for regular tournaments. If you see me playing golf, that's when I'm playing golf.

I would say that. That's how I feel about like working out. Yeah. Part of him to, to not just open up text messages from Tiger Woods though. True. Cause like you're never going to catch a straight text when it's a Blake of the Year time. That's just a picture of the dick.

Tiger Woods probably misfires on a couple of dick pics at least, you know, three or four times a year. Correct. Or it's like meetup plans. You don't need those out there too. No, you don't. Yeah. All right.

That's it. Hank. Great job. Thank you. Good job, Hank. I like your hot seat and your cool throne. Thank you. You're welcome.

My hot seat is the standard. My hot seat is on the hot seat because today Mike Tomlin, I think this was on NFL Live. Somebody tweeted it at me. So shout out to that person. Shout out you dude. Mike Tomlin said the journey is the journey. So we're replacing standard with journey I think this year. I like that.

Yeah. The journey is the journey. Don't stop the journey. Yeah. Yeah. When the lights go down in the city. It's not when you get there to the journey. The journey is the journey.

That's a big time Bill Walton quote right there too. Yeah. That's good. My other hot seat is the Monterey 5 because as I've been telling you guys, I've been watching Big Little Lies. Yep. And let me tell you Meryl Streep is coming in. We don't, no spoilers.

No spoilers. I'm just saying Meryl Streep is wrecking people. She's right. She's so her little passive aggressive comments. She is the all time goat when it comes to passive aggressive comments. Still gonna watch it. You ever see a Steve Spurrier press conference when he's talking about Tennessee and they just beat the fuck out of him by like 40 points?

Yep. He's like I reckon that's the closest game we've ever had with those guys. That's what Meryl Streep does like with these little snide remarks. She's absolutely owning it. She's gonna make somebody do something they regret by the end of the season. Uh oh. Calling my shout right now. Big regrets.

You guys need to watch Big Little Lies. That's what I'm getting at. My other, well no I had the baby filter so I'm taking that off. My cool throne is future Hall of Famer Matt Stafford. Oh. Because Golden Tate in an interview today said that the best quarterback he ever played for was Matt Stafford not Russell Wilson. Well he's got some history with Russ.

Allegedly. He has history with Russell Wilson. You didn't say Nick Foles? He didn't. Is Russell Wilson gonna be a Hall of Famer? Our Carson Wins. Russell Wilson will be a Hall of Famer. Yes.

He's a Hall of Famer. So two Hall of Famers he's played with. Yeah. Listen you cuck future you get in anywhere you want. Yeah. Well actually three future Hall of Famers now because he's playing with Eli. Sure. Yeah.

Great point. He's the Hall of Fame maker. Mm-hmm. At various times in his career. And possibly Daniel Jones. Imagine if Daniel Jones went to the Hall of Fame. I mean there's a chance. There's a chance he can take.

Oh hey that was a fucking killer. That was good. I can't wait for training camp to get started just for all the pictures of Daniel Jones standing next to Eli man. It's gonna be great. They always have that stupid open mouth look at the same time. It's gonna be great. My other cool throne is Game of Thrones because they led all TV shows with 32 Emmy nominations.

That's actually the most all time. So the final season turns out it was awesome. So critically acclaimed. All you idiots that say that it sucked you're wrong because Emmys matter more than your stupid opinions. 32 Emmy nominations. It'd be great if they didn't win though wouldn't it. There's so many that are just bullshit though like set design and all that crap and like

costumes and how many corpses you can blow up with drag. They probably are gonna win an Emmy for like Dragonfire. I mean set design. You want to talk. I want to talk about legit where we're spanning decades here. We've got we've got Starbucks cups showing up. We've got Jewel pod showing up. We've got we've got bottled water showing up on set.

It's true. It's good point. Mind bending. It's good point. All right. My hot seats is cups at Wrigley Field. So it's been a big to do the cup snakes at Wrigley basically at the end of games at Wrigley the bleachers people will put all their empty beer cups together and make the biggest

cup snake they can do possible. Our guy Eddie who has a podcast called Chicago Dog Walk Barstool. He works for Barstool. He had a security guard on named Ligma Balls. Well he just interviews random people. Yeah. He interviewed Ligma Ballsack and Ligma Ballsack says they Polish. Yeah.

That's Polish. They said they are trying to like stop the cups and you've got it all into it. Ligma Ballsack then got fired which is hilarious because at some point in the last week or so there's been a meeting in like the Cubs offices executive suites being like we got to do something about this Ligma Ballsack guy. But it gets better because the Cubs VP of communication Julian Green who you might remember was accused of harassing journalists who wrote bad things about Addison Russell. He wrote an email to us and to Eddie and said so now Barstool Sports Eddie and Carler

are going to go on a crusade for a guy who goes by Ligma Ballsack. He wrote this email. So this is the VP of communications had to write for the Ligma Ballsack and I said nothing because I was not a Ligla for a guy who goes by Ligma Ballsack and make him a martyr under the guise of an emergency news brief. Eddie says they don't care about the snakes but Barstool is selling twenty dollar shirts to say come and take it. You can buy those shirts right now in the Barstool Sports Store.

Thanks for the promotion there Julian. If this is the posture Barstool is going to take with our business and ex-employees then we'll have no interest in not only future opportunities with fans players etc. But flag our vote of no confidence with the other clubs and major league baseball. I have received numerous messages from colleagues from around the league including recently from the Cardinals who call this BS. And he goes on to keep going but he threatened to take away the access we don't even have and cited the Cardinals as saying yeah that fun thing that every fan is doing in the bleachers

that's bullshit. A vote of no confidence is the biggest like pile of nothing that I've ever heard like ever like reprimanding somebody by saying we had a vote of no confidence in you. And I don't even know what that means but that's just something that someone invented to make their job seem like it was powerful. Let me just remind you we're talking about cups. We're talking about cup snakes where people are actually recycling. They're doing a favor to the to the Wrigley Field staff.

They're collecting all the cups for them so they don't have to go around and get them after. So the Cubs are actually destroying the environment. Yes. The Cubs are ruining the planet. Not really Julian Green. Not so green. Credit to the Chicago guys I'm looking on our website store and these shirts are they

have like 15 shirts. Oh they're so funny. Yeah. Why doesn't somebody just take a cup snake and then wrap it against itself so it becomes a big cup circle. That would be good. That would be tougher to remove. Caught in it.

Yeah. Yeah. And it's just one of those classic things where if the Cubs security did nothing no one would care. And if they just let a couple of cups snakes get built people would probably forget about the cups snakes. But the fact that they're aggressively I don't even blame the security guards they're just doing their job.

They're probably you know college kids working in the summer. I blame the people on the business side not the baseball side of the Cubs who are so out of touch with the fans and they send emails basically saying we're going to give you a vote or no confidence over cups. That's tough. Cup snakes. That's very tough. Cup snakes.

So what's the way out of this. I don't know. I was saying the only I would say in the best way out of it is if the Cubs had any self awareness they'd have Theo dress up like St. Patrick and go and get rid of all the cup snakes in the bleachers. That would be nice. Yeah. But they don't.

That's not even Theo's fault. I don't know what you do with this. I don't really see a way out of it. No. I'm them because either they say OK we're going to have cup snake night and the winner gets like season tickets. Yes. That's really the only way that is like 100 percent the other way in the other direction

though I tell you what the way to not do it is have your VP of communications email Eddie and Carl and say we're giving you a vote of no confidence and the Cardinals have our back. What if they just what if they went like police state with and start tasing people that made cup snakes. I wouldn't. It's actually it's it's a public menace. Yeah.

It's a danger. These cup snakes get these cup snakes out of my damn bleachers. I do not like the fact that they are preventing people from recycling though. Yeah. It's bullshit. That is bullshit. We're trying to save our planet as an environmentalist myself. It's the hottest summer ever.

Yeah. That's right. Again it'll be even hotter next summer if you don't stop throwing away all these cups. Correct. So way to go Cubs you screwed that and again the Cubs business side the baseball side knows what they're doing. It's the guys Crane Kenny and Julian Green you screwed this one and thanks for taking away the access we never had.

Yeah. So you got us all the Cubs interviews we've ever done is in personal relationships. You got us. You're not going to let us interview anyone. I was going to say it'd be real shame if we didn't have to talk to Cubs players all the time on this show. We haven't talked to anyone for a long time. Cool thrown SEC officiating because they have a Twitter account now.

Oh good. So this will be a good way. They they created a Twitter account for SEC football. The most sane fan fans in the world and they basically were like hey welcome to Twitter guys we're here. They said hello world this account will serve as your source for rules video statistics and activities inside the SEC video center. Go easy on us.

If you don't think that the SEC officials are going to be doctoring videos to make it look like Devin White hit that guy in the head a lot harder. You don't know Southern football. I love that someone thought this was a good idea. They're like hey what if we got in touch with the fans on this Twitter thing. That would be good. There's really no win for them. So the responses are very funny a lot of like Ham and Alabama fan is my check cleared yet

but the people who like one guy just said hey can you please provide an explanation for the missed holding call against Sidney Rice versus Tennessee in 2006. Good question. They just went off on all these random things that have happened in the last like 30 years. I've been talking about that. Yeah. Well you know what at least that fan base probably doesn't have high amounts of internet activity compared to others.

I feel like they all just have a Twitter account just to tweet at SEC football officials. Yeah that and recruits recruits high school kids and officials getting into message. This actually could be brilliant though if we're talking about SEC fan bases I feel like they're the most likely to find like the officials private personal accounts and go after them. So this is just like hey no attack us. Right. It's a shield. Quick going after Cleetus Blakeman's profile.

OK. That's actually fair. It could be a shield so that they they can get away with all this stuff. I'm going to reserve judgment till we hear from our guy Paul. Fine bomb until until he instructs us how to how to deal with this. Bama hasn't played anybody Paul. All right let's get to our interview with Dr. Phil then we're going to Jacoby Berset after that before we do that Postmates Postmates is your personal food delivery grocery delivery

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days this is just free to start your free deliveries download the app and use code PMT that's code PMT for $100 of free delivery credit for your first seven days when you download the Postmates app anything you need anytime you need it Postmates it download Postmates and save with code PMT OK here he is Dr. Phil OK we now welcome on Dr. Phil you know him you've seen him on TV you might have read some of his books how many books do you have right now Well let's see I've got a couple of ball dot cheese I've got Oh you mean my book yeah here I've written nine actually nine yeah OK nine which is your

favorite self-matters yeah it's a lot of work to do but it was a lot of work to write to but that's my favorite probably OK by the way we should just set the stage here we are at your house in our van right it's raining out so if you hear the rain that's why it's a little ambient noise that will probably set everyone at peace did you see me pull in yes you were driving your convertible convertible in a driving rainstorm and it starts dousing you so I was just coming up the hill and all of a sudden bam yeah it's got me I figured I could get here quicker than I could stop and put up the top yeah well you know what they say about the weather in LA yeah if you don't like it just wait five minutes yeah but I mean

it's not supposed to rain it's supposed to rain like again in like I don't know November yeah you're right that's the thing when it rains in LA you just say hey we needed the water it's only when yeah it's only when you take your convertible out that's when it rains um OK so Dr. Phil I gotta say I like your studio here this is thank you this is a very vintage VW van right yeah 1982 I think yeah it's a good year before Big Cat jumps in I have one quick question about the rain is it true that it makes people have to use a bathroom I hope not yeah because we're kind of jammed in here yeah well I can we got a bathroom right above it so if you get desperate let me know okay we're gonna ask a lot of uh doctor questions just you know I also

want to do something where I'm gonna try to Dr. Phil you during this interview at certain points good luck with that okay well game on yeah game on all right I want to start with something so we are a sports podcast you played football growing up not very well but well but you played in college that's pretty damn good and you also were part of a team that lost a hundred to six that's correct although I didn't play in that game oh I have an excuse you throwing your teammates into the bus though no I have an excuse we that was in 1968 against the University of Houston and my excuse that's the year that something called the Hong Kong flu which is kind of like the bird flu now came through and absolutely decimated our team huh so we were completely wiped out by the Hong

Kong flu so we were scheduled to play the University of Houston Bill Yeoman the coach at Houston said look don't cancel the game we know y'all are sick we know you don't have enough players but don't cancel the game it'll cost us a fortune come down we'll play the game and I'm gonna run the score up on you so we go down it was 23 players the the guy that played quarterback had not taken a snap since the seventh grade oh my god and he runs the score up a hundred to six oh my god and you weren't there and then that was in the I was in the infirmary at the University of Tulsa with a lot of my teammates we were like puking our guts up and then listening to it on the radio thinking oh god was that the end of your football career no I mean I did play later against OU that year

we got beat 77 to seven oh okay and the headline I think was OU Frosh extra points enough to beat Tulsa oh no that's just mean I mean that's chicken shit come on that's terrible yeah it was true 11 to 7 I did the math in my head yeah thanks were you uh were you a captain on the team uh yes I was actually sadly I feel like you would be a pretty good half-time speech giver yeah well the coach did that and usually we were getting our ears beat off but yeah we were you know we had some good games but we had some bad games but I enjoyed football I have to tell you remember how the coaches used to tell you men this will teach you about life and I used to think oh yeah this will teach you about football not about life but as it turned out it actually did yeah I believe it so

you kind of consider yourself or I guess a lot of doctors do consider themselves coaches in a way how do you know when you're talking to somebody when to grab them by their face mask and yank them over to you and just want to give them a hug well everybody's different you know you don't um I never confront just to be confronting I never support just to be supporting I do whatever I read in the moment somebody needs to make a meaningful change in their life what do I what do I need right now oh you seem to be doing pretty good you seem like you're pretty happy uh-huh yeah you seem pretty chill you're hanging around in a van yeah so just a high five is what I yeah how did this van get out here by the way we drove it very carefully you drove this from New York no no no

we rented it yeah from down from like 40 minutes away from LA hey Dr. Phil are you happy about what life yeah I'm pretty happy in my life how about you I'm good yeah yeah what are you happy about life what about your life uh things are going pretty well right now yeah you got a relationship yeah am I actually gonna have a child in a in a I don't know when this will air but in a month oh you're expecting yeah first can you tell look at my belly first yes boy or girl boy oh you know do you want me to name him Phil have you picked a name I'll give if you give me one million dollars I'll name him Phil I don't care what you name him okay I wouldn't give you 50 cents I know hey Dr. Phil I noticed you deflected there are you sure you're happy I'm very happy

he's not telling you there uh-oh I'm Dr. filling you there was someone I'm waiting for you to come up with some no no the silence spoke volumes yeah we're good all right so back to sports that was the first you passed that test okay first Dr. I'll squeak by yeah you squeak by all right uh you did a segment once on your show about fanatical sports fans and uh I did there yeah you had a guy on who's a cowboy's fan who said uh the cowboys need me as a fan they need me as a fan so at what point is uh being a fan of a team detrimental to one's life well you know I have a simple definition for whether something is abnormal or not I mean if you go to the library and you look up normal there's nothing there you look up abnormal there's stacks and stacks of books rows and rows of books

but if you look up normal there's like one little pamphlet laying down nobody knows what normal is but something's abnormal if it disrupts your life if it interferes with your pursuit of goals if it interferes with your relationships if it interferes with your job your career I mean all if it interferes then that's abnormal and so if you have an obsession with something whether it's video games sports pullbacks gambling whatever yeah if it disrupts your pursuit of healthy goals then that's abnormal and there are fans that get that way okay what about doesn't disrupt my normal life but totally affects my mood for weeks and months at a time that's not good are you sure because I I feel like that I'm absolutely sure of a fan that's just like a heart you know you wear

it like a coat of honor but you're taking yourself too seriously you didn't necessarily say it made him feel worse it just changes his mood for month maybe he feels better yes he did he said it just erupts his mood yeah it does in a positive way though yeah when we win yeah yeah but what happens when you lose bad really bad really bad spiral because I'm a cowboy fan and I quit him every sunday and then I swear I'm never going to watch him again and every sunday morning I'm back again right yeah I quit him then I'm back again every sunday morning yeah I've got a really dumb question why is it called a shrink well I think the idea was that you're shrinking somebody's head so you're getting in there and pulling everything back together okay and and from what I know when it comes

to speaking with shrinks goal setting is very is that offensive to use the s word shrink no okay all right I didn't know I didn't know that probably is the probably thing it's condescending doesn't bother me in the least okay so I know that goal setting is very important but for guys like us like if we set a goal and then we don't hit it that sucks so why why would I want to set a goal and then not hit it well you wouldn't you wouldn't want to set a goal and not hit it particularly if you're fragile not fragile strong fragile nobody nobody hits all their goals right so what do you do if you set a goal you're really excited about it and then you fall a little bit short well you adjust and go after it again I mean you probably made some progress right probably yeah yeah so you've

got a new base to start with and you set it up a new plan and go after it again if it's still something you want okay what about this so we deal with this a lot we're you know we have a successful podcast we're online a lot we oftentimes will just read the one or two negative things and gloss over the 98 positive things out of 100 how do you fix that well look you everybody's got haters right yep and you everybody wants to be liked by everybody you wish everybody thought everything you did was great but they're just not you just have to tell yourself no matter what you do I don't care you could change you could read what those haters said and change everything that they say accept every criticism and do your podcast again either they or somebody else would find

something wrong with it I guarantee you there are people out there that they're gonna hate no matter what you do so you might as well just do what you want what what is the mentality of a hater let's put down the haters because that's how I like to fight back like you're a loser dude well there are those people that just sit in their mother's basement yep haven't seen sunlight for weeks go off don't do doodly squat yep and they just find fault with other people and disparage the efforts of others I mean there are those people that do that and they get off on it I call them keystroke bullies oh okay and they and you know something they would never say that to you in an elevator that's no that's true they probably wouldn't want a picture yeah if they were

in an elevator they wouldn't say hey you suck your your your podcast is shallow it's terrible it's horrible they wouldn't say that to you they wouldn't say that to you if they were walking down the street but they're anonymous so they'll say it to you on a keyboard interesting so you actually have a podcast now too uh yeah I have a couple do you have any questions for us about how to be a successful podcaster yeah how how heavy what do you guys attribute to step one because you really are successful at this by van that's number one yeah step two we don't take ourselves too seriously right as you can probably pick up on this interview yeah I think people like to laugh and get a distraction from the serious parts of life and that's what we try to do we never get too serious we

never talk about subjects that will make people uh upset or not even upset I'm talking more like we just like to keep everything on the lighter side of life I think you skipped something that I think makes you successful go right to it I think both of you are really curious I think you're naturally very curious I am because you ask questions that suggest to me that you really do want to know about people or other people so there's a natural curiosity that to me makes you sound very authentic yeah okay makes me sound like it makes you sound like you really genuinely are interested in whoever you're talking to that's true we want to know really how we can get better at gambling that's good if you're going to be a gambler right right we're not very good we're

working a goal is to get less bad at gambling yeah that's what I like to do is set very nebulous goals so that way I can just say yeah I I hit that one I got a little bit better probably yeah you lost less money yeah right in 2000 quantifiable yeah in 2015 my uh New Year's resolution was drink more apple juice yeah I had to go I had like two glasses of apple juice and it was more than the year before how do you put that in a book yeah you can do that I mean you should put that in a book listen 10th book right there small goals take the low hanging fruit yes apples squeeze them drink the juice I like yeah do you is there something to be said though for doing uh just the bare minimum when it comes to goals like I like to set really low goals and then sort of like roll over the bar

yeah and then that way you don't ever have to face failure yep correct you're always self affirming yes I like it was that bad long gone is that probably doesn't pay real well wait is that bad what you just said no it's good if it works for you okay okay yeah I'm not sure it pays the rent but I mean it seems to be working for you pretty well yeah you're able to rent this van are you are you comfortable right now I'm okay no in your life oh I thought you meant here no because you guys are pretty comfortable yeah comfortable in life yeah I'm pretty comfortable in your own skin dr. Phil yeah I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin how about you I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin yeah how about you I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin you're comfortable in

his skin no I'm not talking are you talking aboutdocking yeah yeah yeah you like hanging out with Yeah, we're buddies. We're best friends. Oh, yeah, one of you think the other talks too much Yeah, I think we both think that about the other person. So it works out Exactly. That's a good balance. It's real Jack Spratt and his wife could eat no lean situation Our biggest problem is our producer is kind of got a bad attitude. Yeah What was he try to cut you off? See bring thunder into things. Yeah, a lot of vacations. No Yeah, and he also yawns really loudly. Yeah aggressive like that ready for this That's actually just what it sounds like. What would you do? What would you what would the Dr. Phil life strategy for that be?

I'd fire him. Okay. Damn. Yikes. Well, I'm sorry. I wouldn't care if he had kids cat dog Dr. Phil's orders then you'd find out that nobody was here in your podcast because that producers what gets you on the air Back and hiring plot twist Hey You're gonna have to pay me more to get me back. Yeah, cuz when I got out I felt really free damn Yeah, it's gonna be a high price, right Hank. Yeah You just gave our producer a raise for a representation. Yeah, okay That's you know what you just picked up a hank's name that quickly. I said it once

I feel like that is a trait of successful people really remember people's names very quickly. Yeah, do you agree? I Seriously do though. No, yeah, you have to pay attention, right? I think people just like hearing the sound of their own name too, right? It's also just feel better. Whoa. He was listening to that. Yeah, I have a hypothetical situation So I did my research on you. I found out that you were pilot, right? Are you still you sell your license? I do. Okay situation here. You're on a passenger jet The pilot starts having a nervous breakdown, right?

What is your what is your action? Do you go up and try to counsel him through his nervous breakdown or do you say out of my way fly boy? I got the sticks. Dr. Phil's land of this bird buzz a tower I would really go up and try to calm him down so the co-pilot could do his job. Okay, so there's two of them up there You know, that's true. So you would you choose both of them wearing a meltdown I would just try to distract this guy so I didn't do something like really stupid Alright, so let's pretend that this little role play P. F. T. and I are the pilots. Mm-hmm. Try to calm I'm so stressed out. I can't fly this plane anymore. This all I mean

Get this guy out of here. I've just done the Microsoft flight simulator. What the fuck? Are you Dr. Phil? Different than other people when I get on a plane Everybody gets on a plane and they just step on and turn right Go to their seat. I never do that. I get on and look left Because I want to look at who's flying that airplane as well every single time I have never gotten on a plane that I didn't look to pilot in the eye Dr. Phil if you got onto a plane and looked at me and then looked at Dan and then That says more about you

You got yourself into that situation everybody follow me. Yeah, we're out of here Oh, here's a good question. Have you ever wanted to be a psychiatrist for a mafia boss? No Not at all not even after watching the Sopranos. No You're afraid you'd fuck them Yeah, I'm afraid of the Sopranos. I'm afraid I would wind up floating with the fishes. Oh, that's a good point I'd say something I wish I hadn't said yeah, piss them off next thing, you know They're standing by your car in the parking lot. It's interesting. You say that because you are very direct That's kind of what you're known for. I'm pretty direct. Have you ever it?

Does that ever cause tension with some of your patients that you've had in the past all the time? People some sometimes it's very difficult to hear the truth and I don't think I'm the repository of all knowledge But I'm going to tell people the truth as I see it because I think they deserve that right. I mean if people I think Particularly now I think if people are willing to write in and People that I talked to on Dr. Phil have written in an average if I think something like 28 times or something by the time they get on They go to all that trouble

Pack up get on a plane fly out here willing to go public and sit down talk to me. They I think they deserve Clarity, I don't think they should go home wondering what I think about their situation I think they at least deserve to know clearly What my opinion is they don't have to agree with it Hear it if it won't stick with Stan challenge throw it out, but they shouldn't go home thing. Hmm. Wonder what he thinks Interesting. I think I should be clear. Yeah What um say something about Millennials they stink Well Millennials are a little different because they've grown up in a different

Completely different world than I grew up in I mean even when I started dr. Phil the first tweet had not been sent Mm-hmm. There were no smartphones. There wasn't social media to speak of they've grown up in a completely different world I mean, I've got two boys. They don't know what a library is They don't know it's a big book with buildings. Everything is Google. What's a big building of Wikipedia? Yeah, they just don't know they find it on the internet So they've grown up a completely different world than I grew up in so they are different the biggest shift From one generation to the next since the Industrial Revolution in my opinion. Oh, interesting. That's I mean It's I think we get so we're actually the plot twist there is that we actually are Millennials, right?

So I wanted you to say something really bad, but you didn't but I agree with you It's very hard for I feel like we get a bad rap for the most part. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I don't think it's necessarily bad It's just different you you guys grew up. I took typing in high school and now Typing for you guys. I mean, it's like reading your ABCs. Mm-hmm. You guys are so much more tech savvy Than we are it's just unbelievable. Yeah, but I don't have an I don't have a bad opinion of Millennials It's just a different world you grew up in. Yeah, what about fortnight? You had someone who's addicted to fortnight on your show. Oh, yeah, how'd that go? Well, you know, actually there is a Lot of research that suggests that the pleasure centers

Light up and some of the same pathways light up from Video game addiction as light up from other types of addiction that you really can get So involved and so dependent on playing some of these games that it can be very painful to stop Yeah, I mean, I know a lot of people that are addicted to their phones. Yeah in general How do you how do you break addiction? Because right now? I'm afraid to look at that little thing on my iPhone that tells me how much screen time I've had in a given day Mine's like eight hours. I will not

Yeah, it's dangerous per day. It's scary. Yeah, it is scary. How do you break that addiction? You know, that's a that's a myth people think you break habits. You don't break habits What you do is replace one behavior with a different start smoking. Yeah, you start smoking or gambling Something like that off your phone. You can't use your phone at the gambling table. That's yeah, that's a great point That's the way to get off your phone. That's right pay you the big good advice. That's right I had a tweet. I wanted to throw out there just because we were coming clean. This is you know Client what is it doctor? Patient confidentiality there between us right now. There is no such relationship between us right now

No, I said it I declared it so it is I wrote in 2014 dr. Phil on Sports Center talking about Cleveland's love-hate relationship with LeBron I'll just put my head in the oven instead I don't know if that was about you or LeBron, but I wanted to just get it out there So what did you you wrote that I wrote that what did you mean? I don't know I don't know if it's because I hate LeBron or I hated you at the time. I have no idea But I thought it needed to be addressed. Do you like Cleveland? No, do you like LeBron? No, do you like me? Yeah Okay, you must been talking about LeBron then. Okay, I guess I was all right

Don't you think they had a love-hate relationship with him? Yeah, so explain that love them explain that when he leaves I mean they just they hate him because they're Number one need in all people is acceptance number one fear is rejection. He rejected the cities. I'm out of here So they all felt rejected. We're not good enough. You're leaving us so that that hurts So they really had a love-hate relationship with him. That's very cuz they all felt a connection to him Yeah, so he comes back and you think the whole city is like I don't know if I'm ready to love again Like a little skeptical your dad comes back in after spending two years down Miami getting cigarettes No, he's out here in LA. Yeah, you love him. You know, I don't know why he came here

I don't know why they moved all that money movies. Maybe so. Yeah. I mean, it's a bigger commercial market Right, I'll land. Yeah, so you can get a lot of it more endorsements. Yeah, tensile town He's got all the boo. He's got the biggest endorsement deals Probably you can never get but he's in a bigger market. So yeah, I mean more entertainment I guess we talk a lot about the clutch gene on our show But I think what it when it is really is mental toughness, right? Can you build mental toughness in a person that doesn't already? Sure, how do you do that? Well, it's it's a matter of somebody Observing themselves perform under pressure. And so they attribute to themselves the ability to perform under pressure

You only do we form our self-image by watching ourselves do what we do So if you see yourself fold under pressure, then you attribute to yourself. I fold under pressure But if you see yourself take the shot and make it you go, hey, I held up under pressure You see yourself make that critical pass under pressure. You say when it got down to it. I stayed cool. I executed I'm a clutch player. You only know that by observing yourself. Do it. That's how we form our self image We make self attributions based on self-observation Something related do they serve ice cream on your private plane? No, really? No, why there's no freezer. Oh, why not?

Do you know what kind of cut rate private plane is that? Come on, Dr. Phil. There's no freezer You're not an ice cream guy. No. Well, I love ice cream. Yeah Yeah, so let's get it on the private plane a rods guy on his private. What's the point of having a private plane without ice cream It is pretty punk in right like look into that, right? Like I I just want to eat ice cream on my private plane. I'm a PJ. You should do that I don't have a private plane. Can I do it on yours? Problem solved. Yeah. Okay. I'll look it I'll even look at the the the pilots for you. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, you're pilot eyeball guy. Yeah. Yes. Yes I know them very well. Yeah, okay fine

So can you do us a favor? We have a running bit It's called big Ben's walking boot Ben Rothesburg. He always gets hurt and your voice sounds very similar to what we use for the Voice for a walking boot. Really? Yeah, it's like a I suspect you tell that to everybody Tootsies are looking at a cold This boo, so you just say hey Ben Dude, you want to put this boot on? Hey, Ben, you want to put this boot on? Yeah, big Ben's walking boot and scene that was great you nailed that how much serious question

Would you attribute your success to your voice because it's very smoothing soothing and smooth? Really? Yes I would think people wouldn't find that to be the case. No, it's comforting Oh, but I tell you what it is different than most people on television, right? Right and I look different In Hollywood, everybody looks like Johnny Depp or something, right? Mm-hmm. Nobody looks like this I've seen better heads on a nickel beer. This is I mean nobody looks like this on TV, right? Tony Kronheiser Yeah, yeah, I mean at least it's distinct Joe very David Right. Mm-hmm. Dr. Phil. Dr. Phil. I read an article

That says I read an article that said 78% of men would rather amputate a part of their body than be bald Yeah, I'd agree with that depends on which part. Well, is it a question? Well, I It's tough to ask me. Well, no, it's tough to ask me because I actually gambled Made a bet last year that I'd cut off my pinky if the text is one of the super bowl So I would very much give away the tip of my pinky. Would you cut off your little toe rarer than be bald? 100% not even a question. You wouldn't even think about it. Are you serious right now? Yeah, see uh, I listen The little toe doesn't do anything. Here's what I'm gonna teach you a lesson. Dr. Phil. You ready for this? I'm ready. I'm aware

You are fabulously successful Insanely wealthy How do you know that? Well, we're sitting in your house and it's very big But insanely wealthy very successful top of your profession Me sitting here. I can always be like but i'm not bald Yeah, so that's like that's the only way a hater like me can get one over Right, so that's where that's where it comes in. That's the psyche of it. You know, yeah But I decided a long time ago. You have to embrace weaknesses. I guess so

I decided to make it a trademark you got me there Make it a trademark. Yeah, I mean the first book I wrote Oprah said you'll find it. He's got his big old bald head right here on the front of it What the hell that's me. Yeah, so I just embrace it. So I'll put my big old bald head on every book Yeah, no, that's true. A trademark is big. Uh, skype and pelt. He's bald. Good point I just named so many people He's all successful though. Maybe that's the key to success. Maybe that's the deal Just go bald. Okay. I retract my pinky till offer. I would take my pinky till back and go bald What about a toupee you ever thought about it? Never just for a day. Never you shave the mustache. What was up with that?

Well, Oprah shaved it. Yeah, what was the story behind that? Uh, she we were at radio city music hall and She just wanted to shave it off And you said okay Oprah's still the boss. Hell, yes Want to shave it off. Okay. Yeah, so is there is there that dynamic? It was just a goof A goof but is there that dynamic because obviously Oprah helped you get your start Is there that dynamic that she's kind of always Uh, not the boss but seen in that light. She did not help me get my start. Okay

There would be no dr. Phil without Oprah that she didn't help me get my she gave you created me. Yes She created my start. Absolutely a hundred percent. There would be no dr. Phil without Oprah Right, and she's one of my best friends in the world. We've been friends for oh 25 years We knew knew each other for several years before I was ever on her show So do you you brought up your voice earlier? Do you actually do any training to keep that texas accent? Do you go spend time in texas? Do you uh, watch dallas reruns? No, I'm actually this country. Yeah Is that far in? I was in texas in arkansas, uh, monday and tuesday this week

You don't have to go back very often for it to just stay in full bloom. Trust me. Yeah, because you should keep that The second dr. Phil walks out on stage like said, dude, so let me know what you're all bummed out about today That's what i'm changing the channel. You know my my uh My son was in arkansas a few weeks ago and he he called an uber driver and it was a taxi the scraped taxi off the side And uh, he got in the guy said, uh, you want cold beer? There you go. He said, uh, what? He said you want cold beer? I'm having one And he said really? He said, yeah, we dsr here. He's what you mean? He's we do shit, right? There you go. So that's my people put that in your book. That's my people

Right is a great title for your next one. Yes. Do shit, right? dsr away eating ice cream on a on a private plane. That's right. Oh go ahead pft I was just gonna say what's up with mk ultra? The what mk ultra are you familiar? No, so back in like the 70s a bunch of psychiatrists and psychologists They were working for the cia. They dosed people with lsd. Mm-hmm, and then they brainwashed them. Mm-hmm. Do you would you like to apologize? Yes, well behalf of the profession. That was a real chicken shit thing to do. Yeah, it was Fuck I would have been part of that. Yeah, that would have been cool. Yeah. No, that's not that's not good. Yeah Um, so we in our line of work we get a lot of cease and desist lawsuits whatever you've been in litigation before

How do you fight off the haters like that when you get a like a cease and desist? Do you just throw it in the trash like we do? uh, you know People bark let them bark, you know You got to tell the truth as you see it And I I'm not one to despair each other's You know, I just don't really do I tell the truth as I see it if that steps on people's toes. I'm sorry You know, but I'm not someone to single somebody out

And disparage them, you know, that's just not what I do. It's not my personality Um, I'll talk about issues. I'll talk about my beliefs or opinions, but I don't usually attack an individual Okay, have you ever attacked an individual? I actually don't know the answer. Have you ever been in a fight? Actually thinking I have no idea the answer to that. No, not publicly. No, I don't do that I mean, I don't go on the air and say right. So and so is a jerk this guy. Yeah, I don't do that Right. When was the last time you got in a fight? Oh, gosh, that'd have been

Probably in college football. It's been a while. I think you can still scrap Um, oh, yeah, I mean, I mean I move like a cat That's the last question we were going to ask you Yeah, there we go. I was on you. I hate Mondays. That's perfect. We're here on a Wednesday. That's perfect Um, all right, so I got one last question. Seeky question put in promo code take you get $10 off seeky, uh purchase Can you give us just like some tips or life strategy? You have a book called life strategies Can you dumb it down for dumb guys like us? Just be like, Hey, here's the key to happiness money

power Range rovers being taller than you are. Yeah video games ice cream on private jets getting stronger Do you want us to write a book for you? I think you pretty much covered the list Not being happy with your money. So you need more money being able to bench a shitload of weight. Yeah No, my my advice seriously Is if you want to get ahead in this world Figure out why people do what they do and don't do what they don't do

If you figure that out, you got an edge on the world Think about that. If you figure out why people do what they do and don't do what they don't do Then you understand the dynamics of life. That makes a huge difference. I've been focused on that since I was 12 years old That's fascinating. Everybody in this van when you said that all did the same thing, by the way We all looked up. Yeah trying to think Like what don't do what they don't do now I think I got it and I think I know why I don't do what I don't do And now that I've conquered that I can conquer anything

I don't smoke weed on Sundays. Why not because we have to work. Yeah, I don't drink on saturday nights Why I have to I have to work on sundays. That's all why I don't drink I don't drink as much on saturday nights as I do on friday nights. I started to say I was gonna have totally bullshit flag I was like, I'm not believing this. You've been lied to before. I'm not believing this. I don't do I don't do things I don't want to do. Yeah, I don't believe that either. Yeah, you're married. I always do stuff that I have to do. You've got a baby on the way, so I don't believe that. I always gotta do stuff I don't want to do. I have one last question for you. You've already asked your last question. No, he asked his last question. So this is what's great about having two people interviewing is you get basically unlimited last questions.

It always goes. How come reverse psychology never works? It does work. Gotcha. Damn. Boom. Wow. You just got Dr. Phil. You just got Dr. Phil. I was softening you up for that. That was easy. Dr. Phil, that was easy. That was really easy. Can I have some Adderall? You each get a last question? Yeah, you regret the fact that we both get last questions. I think both of you are on Adderall. And I seriously doubt that you have prescriptions for it. If you do, you should not have prescriptions for it. You think our minds work too fast? Yeah. It's kind of scary. I think you're over speeding the computer here. When we get cooking. This is not a biker crank right here. This is just this is good old fashioned three hours of sleep, baby.

I do want to apologize for something because I was scheduled to do this in New York and I got stuck in ridiculous traffic. And so I showed the plate. So I said, I will, you said you were coming to LA and I said, I'll do it when we're in LA. And now you're really regretting. No, I don't say something. So I apologize that I wasn't here on time and I appreciate you guys coming here instead. And how much do you wish that we didn't reschedule? How much do you wish you just never said it because we just bodied you at the end? I was glad. I was glad that you came. And I think this is very inventive that you do this. Yeah, thank you. Are you are you going to spiral after this? Like, is this going to be a, do we need to help you out here? Are you happy?

I think I'll muddle through. Are you sure you're happy? I think I'll muddle through. That's your sixth last call. Yeah. Yeah. Like imagine if we get a story tomorrow, Dr. Phil spirals, because he's got bodied in the back of a van by two idiots. Yeah. And then how are you going to feel? You're going to be going. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, we will take so much credit. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You better believe it. You think that a hundred to six losses are threatening around? You know the type of guys we are. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know this, Dr. Phil. Where do I send the cease and desist letters? Throw it away. Send to the trash, right? Directly to the trash. Special filing. Put out the middleman. Yeah, exactly. Do you want to plug

your podcast one last time? No. No, you don't want any of our listeners. No, you guys can plug it for me sometime. Oh, yeah. Thank you. You have multiple. I got fill in the blanks, which is an interview. That's fucking smart. Fill in the blanks. Yeah. My son did that. And then I've got Dr. Phil analysis of murder and analysis of murder by Dr. Phil, where he looked inside the heads of murderers. Do you remember when you did this gift? This. Do you remember that one? No. Here, I'll show it to you. It's the best gift for all time. Yeah. What's up? No service. That's smart because then he knows we can never get that gift. You can never get the gift. No one in your house can never get the gift because you have no service. You got jamming service out here? Yeah. Jamming

software. Yeah. It's Dr. Phil. You know which one it is. You know which one I'm talking about. You know which one it is. You guys will never get out of here alone. You know which one it is. I'll do it again. It's what you're going to do right after this interview. Does anybody have service? It's what I'm doing inside now. Screaming for help. I'll look it up later. Okay. It's a great gift. All right. Dr. Phil, thank you so much. Last question. No, just kidding. Appreciate it. All right, guys. See you later. That interview with Dr. Phil was brought to you by Let Go. Let Go is the fastest growing mobile marketplace to buy and sell locally. Let Go's vision is to create a more sustainable future where nothing goes unused and to inspire the world to live and let go.

Living is experiencing more things, taking advantage of what's around you and getting the most out of it. If you're looking to sell, Let Go gives you an opportunity to turn your unused items into experiences. If you're looking to buy, Let Go gives you access to a lifestyle you otherwise might not be able to afford. You can get designer brands, cars, even sneakers, whatever somebody else is looking to let go. Their trash can be your treasure. Let Go is the go-to place to help you through life changes such as moving back to school, new parents, newlyweds. If you're moving to New York, it turns out that you're going to be living in a 350 square foot apartment with your giant dog. You have to get rid of a lot of stuff from your nice house that you

had back in Texas. Not that I'm bitter, but if you're in that situation, go to Let Go and you can make some money off it as you're downsizing. Download LetGo at letgo.com slash barstool and tweet us. Tell us what you'll do with the extra money you're making off Let Go. That's again, go to letgo.com slash barstool. And now, that was something completely different. Okay, we now welcome on quarterback, backup quarterback for the Indianapolis Colts. Also Super Bowl champion, Jacobi Berset. And most importantly, Jacobi, we're going to talk about football, but I think the thing that everyone has in their mind right now is what's going on with your Twitter account right now. We got to go through these questions first. I think my Twitter

was hacked. That's where all these questions are coming from. I guess that's what everybody blames it on. It was hacked by Kyrie Irving. Yeah. What's going on? I'm ready. I'm ready. Yes. So, like, let's start there. We do want to talk a little football, but your Twitter questions have been electric recently. Have you gotten the answer, Cindy? I'm going to read a couple of them out loud and we can dive into anyone you want. But like, sitting here, what shape is the sky? Whoa. Yeah. That's funny. One of my, so I'm in this group chat. It's called the Finer Things Club, so I have to shout them out. It's three other dudes. One name's Jack, Josh, and Travis. And we just bounced these dumbass ideas off each other's head

and, you know, Josh texted me that this morning and I was sitting there thinking about it and I just asked. Do you have an answer? Like, I was just thinking about that earlier too. Like, the sky just takes up whatever enclosure that it's in, right? It's like a gas. Is it a circle? I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. I still have yet to get an answer. Everybody keeps saying it's flat or it's a circle shape. The sky is flat. I like that. The earth's not flat. The sky is. Yeah. The sky's flat. What about, what about, uh, you, you asked the question. This is how we, you came across our radar. We've been asking this question a lot last couple years. If the sun is hot, how is outer space cold? Have you gotten an answer to that? Yeah. Uh, so NASA, uh, like,

reached out to me and gave me some, uh, very elaborate answer that left me even more confused, but it kind of clarified it a little bit, but, uh, the answer didn't justify me. So I still opposed that question. Uh, you know, most of the answers I get is me getting a drug test and, um, getting ready to get it randomly drug test. I'm like, well, y'all have given me enough time to prepare. So I think I should be good. I mean, that, that's kind of what NASA does. They answer your question by making you more confused. That's their strategy. They're like, Hey, don't ask all these hard questions. Instead put on this really stylish shirt that says NASA on it and just believe everything that we tell you. Yeah. Not always. Like some people say space is a

vacuum, right? Well, if space is a vacuum, I think you actually brought this point up. I've never put my hand instead of a vacuum. I don't know what it feels like from there. Exactly. I put other parts of my body vacuum. Yeah. Yeah. I ain't going that far. What about, uh, which part of the pig skin is actually a football? That one gave me a big time. Well, yeah. So, so, um, Wilson's football, uh, reached out to me about that. And they kind of, they, they, uh, they explained that it was never pig skin. It was cow skin. Cause I, and I go, cause I went like, and I asked, I said, so where the fan? Let's toss the pig skin come from. And it was actually calcium. So I said, so now I was thinking myself, now I should just go around and just start saying like,

let's go talk, toss the calcium around, but it's not made out of calcium anymore. So, there was another elaborate answer. That's so weird. I don't know why they call it a pig skin then. That's kind of bullshit to me. Um, the other one, I think a lot of the answers are bullshit. Well, how about this one? This is one that we've been debating on this. I think we've been in constant debate on this show for the last three years about this one. Does a straw have one hole or two? So I thought I was going to ask that question this morning, but my club, one of my club members, uh, told me that I shouldn't, uh, but I, I have yet to know that answer. Uh, I would go to, but he told me that it was an easy answer. So I didn't answer. So I didn't ask the question,

but I would say two holes, but what's, wait, what, why is your club trying to silence you? I think you need, are you woke about your club stopping you from asking the hard questions? No, I give them a lot, a lot more respect than I should, is what you're saying. Uh, but, uh, if they can answer the questions, then I kind of don't answer them. I don't ask them because they're kind of, I'm kind of a smart person in that group. So therefore I should, they should be able to answer the question. Has, uh, have you asked any of these questions to, uh, your buddy, Andrew Luck, or I feel like Jim Erce would have some interesting perspective on, on some of this. Andrew doesn't have Twitter, so I doubt he, he probably sees it,

but I'm, uh, have to give him a call and see what he, he'll give me some historic background on all these topics. So I had to block off like four hours in my day. Are you in Andrew Luck's book club? Hell no. Yeah. Okay. Do you want to be in Blake Bortles Wikipedia club? Uh, even more. Hell no. What? Wait, we didn't even let me explain it. We, all we do is we look up two random Wikipedia pages once a month and Blake Bortles calls in and we talk about them. Yeah, I'm going to have to pass on that. I'd much rather read our actual Wikipedia just isn't, I'd much rather watch, let me, uh, read off AxeGeeves than, than Wikipedia. An AxeGeeves club. The Jacobi Berset AskGeeves club. We can do something like that.

And we can start that back up then. I'm, I'm all for that. But let me see if AskGeeves is around. Wow, you're going to bring AskGeeves back from the dead. AskGeeves.com. I'm trying to, uh, all the, you can't quote Google anymore. So you got to, you got to go AxeGeeves. I never got a bad, bad grade on my paper from AxeGeeves. I just typed in AskGeeves.com. It took me to ask. So I could ask, let me ask Geeves real quick. What shape is the sky, Geeves? And it says, oh, it's just like a Google search, but it takes me to some real woke YouTube videos. So I might have to check those out later. Yeah. See the government's probably hacked AxeGeeves though. You can't, can't really,

doesn't care for what you search these days. Yep. I like that. Um, so I was just, I was checking out the new Madden, Madden ratings today. Have you looked at your own rating yet? No, but actually my brother just sent it to me like five minutes ago. Yeah. I think it's fucked up. They only have you, your awareness is only a 74. But the fact that you're asking, I thought it was bullshit myself. Yeah. You're asking these tough questions. I feel like they're really underselling. You should be like at least in the 80s on awareness. You're 71 overall. My thing is who's, who's giving these ratings out from, from Madden. Like that's a real question I

should ask tomorrow. Yes. Cause I think it's bullshit. I'm sure, I thought it was just Madden. It's just John Madden. John Madden does. He just throws the numbers out there. He doesn't know me. Well, he's probably watched your tape. That is true. That is true. We probably have a couple of people that work on the Madden franchise and listen to this show. If you're listening right now, please explain to me how, how Jacobi presets awareness is only 74. We'll get that up. They gave me a 79 speed, which is a total lock. Cause I ain't that bad. So I'll take that. Tell me, keep the speed up. Okay. Do you, uh, do you swear in front of Andrew Luck? I think I swear in front of everybody. It's a bad,

it's a bad, uh, bad trait. I'm trying to change it. Y'all aren't helping though. Does Andrew Luxe swear in front of you? Cause he doesn't, the mic'd up Andrew Luxe are always the funniest when he, when he pats people on the back and says, good job, nice sack. And he's overly, overly nice. Is that just, is he putting on an actor? Is that just how he is? No, he is kind of dorky like that. I mean, he has his, his moments where he kind of, you know, spads is a little bit, but for the most part he's actually like that dorky. Yeah. So it's kind of, it's kind of not fake. I like that. Um, what is, so you, you get to go on like one of the coolest, I would say guy trips every year with Tom Brady, when he takes all those

guys to Kentucky Derby. What is that trip like? You guys all hop into a private plane together and go to the Kentucky Derby? Uh, well, we all meet each other there. The first year we did, what was it? My rookie year. And then last year, cause I was in Indy and uh, he was, they were in Boston. So I drove up cause it's like a two hour drive from me. So I drove up. But it's a, it's a great trip. You know, you just, you don't remember it. You just go back to your, uh, your text messages and see what, what the hell everybody was saying. But, uh, it's a great trip. Did you win any money, win any money on the horses this year? This year? No. Uh, I think, I think everybody in our group probably lost besides Matt Castle.

Yeah. And then, but the year before I won, so I was kind of like ready to bet everything, thinking that I was going to do the same thing again. And then I left empty handed. Uh, so this, don't, don't, uh, take offense for Andrew Luck in this question, but I have to ask, you come in, I probably won't, you come in the game for Hail Mary's. Does Andrew ever look at you like, man, this, you're, you're kind of the alpha of that relationship. If it's strictly a throwing the ball, the farthest thing, does he take any offense to that? The fact that you get called in to throw the ball? No, that was just one time. Uh, but I still consider myself the alpha in a group. Yes. But, uh, yeah, that was, that was just one

time. And, uh, you know, it was so crazy because he was just like cool with it. And I was just like, wait, what the hell just happened? Cause it happened out of nowhere. I kind of knew it was going to happen. Like, probably like the series before, because they said for me to hail Mary, I'll go in and throw. And then, you know, Andrew was like, all right, cool. I was like, you sure? And then it was just one play. So, but he made sure that I never did it again. So, uh, I guess he kind of took control of that. How far can you throw a football? Uh, last time I've thrown it like completely, that was probably 75. That's pretty far. Did you see Odell Beckham, he threw the ball like 90 yards?

Yeah. I kind of question what style of ball that was. So, question everything. Okay. Listen, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not down his athletic ability, but that, that looked far too. Yeah. If he could do that, then he should probably switch positions and get another hundred mil. Yeah. Did you hear what Mike Vrabel said about winning a Super Bowl, that he would cut his own penis off for it? Yeah. That was actually pretty funny. He probably would, hold him to that. I hope every team just loses so they can win. I'm rooting for the Titans to win the Super Bowl now because he'll have to cut it off. Have you asked, uh, would you ask, uh, coach about that?

To cut his dick off? Yeah. I wouldn't, I wouldn't ask any dude anything about his penis, nor will I tell him to do that if we win. That's a little, a little too far. We learned that with Doug Morone. You can talk about in, you know, your own dick cutting it off for Super Bowl, but never talk about another man's penis and cutting that off for a Super Bowl. Yeah. And I'll think, I don't think it's really worth it to be honest with you. Like, I mean, kids, Super Bowl, I mean, which one's more poor? That's true. Um, when you were traded from the Patriots to the Colts, did Belichick sit you down and tell you why or anything? Uh, yeah. He said, cause at the time Julian had got hurt and

we looked for a receiver and that was pretty much it. And I was just froze sitting in front of him. I wasn't talking. He wasn't talking after he told me why, so I just got up and left. That's it? You still haven't talked to him since then? No, I saw him at a derby. So it was all good. That's like you guys just ended the conversation and walked out. Well, yeah, it was just like, all right, good luck. You know, I was like, all right, I guess. I don't know. I don't know what the hell is going on right now. I had to get on the flight and go to Indy. I love it. I love it. All right. My last question, because you are a very curious guy, do you have any questions for us?

Uh, questions for you guys. Well, are y'all going to give me answers or tell me that I just need to get drug tested? Probably the latter. I don't give it a shot. Listen, I'm not a drug guy, but I'm not going to cast dispersions on you if you are. All right. So I have a couple, a couple that I have. I got all of my thoughts and my notes on my phone. So so that if 2% milk is 2%, what's the other 90% 98% of it? Hey, that's a good question. Dad, I don't know. Hank, you know, chocolate butter. Oh, butter butter. Okay, butter. There you go. That was our producer. Hank, he just answered that one for you. Next question. All right. Yeah. Who, who was the translator between caveman and the language that we speak now?

The Rosetta Stone. Oh, yeah. Dude, we had a guy on the podcast who created the Game of Thrones language. He literally just created out of thin air. So we're, we're pretty much just talking gibberish is what you're saying. Yeah. To other people. Yeah. For sure. Yeah. It's just our special kind of gibberish that we agree that would make sense to us. It'll fuck your mind up if you think about it. Yeah. It was like everyone be cool. Just go along with it. All right. I hear you. All right. My last question and I'll let y'all answer this one. This area 51 shit. Yeah. What y'all take on that? Well, we went into it on Monday's podcast, but we think it's a setup. We think it's a setup. We don't

know who's setting up who. So it's either a setup by the government to get the crazy people offline or it's a setup by the aliens to get rid of all the people who believe in aliens. I think y'all need to be drug tested. All right. Jacobi for set. Thanks, man. We're going to start the Ask Jeeves club. So you're going to have to, you're going to have to call back in when we do our Ask Jeeves club. All right. Perfect, man. Thanks. Thanks for having me. All right. Thanks, man. That interview with Jacobi Berset was brought to you by Ruffin Rowdy nine. Ruffin Rowdy nine is going to Fort Bragg, North Carolina for a red white and bruised beat down this weekend. Ruffin Rowdy is the best event we do. Everyone says it all the

time. There's always that one guy that you're going to want to know everyone's going to be talking about on Monday. Hey, do you see Ruffin Rowdy nine, whether it's a raccoon boy, whether it's Hank landing a clean knockout. There's always something to talk about a big storyline coming out of Ruffin Rowdy. And it is this Friday. You basically get laugh out loud nonstop commentary from big cat and large plus insane unpredictable action in the ring. It's amateur fighters with no defense throwing haymakers combined with the funniest most action packed four hours you'll ever have. We guarantee at some point you'll have tears in your eyes from laughing because you've never seen anything like it. Go to buy R and R dot com to learn how you can watch the fight

for free. That's right. There's a way that you can watch the fight for free. Go to buy R and R dot com to find out how. Okay, let's get some segments. First up, we have bachelorette talk for guys that don't watch the bachelorette. But Hank, watch the bachelorette. It was fantasy sweet. Okay, watch that. You had to watch it. Yep. Okay, you get a pass. This is why we watch. Yeah, this is why we watch basically like watching porn sky stuff. Yeah, it was it was electric. It was a great night of TV. It's like a soft core porn. Yeah, you make your predictions before you're like, I was four people going in because Hannah pulled a unprecedented move of bringing four instead of three. She was just like, I want four guys. Yeah. The first guy,

pilot Pete, he got he got it in the windmill. What do you mean? What does that mean? That's where the fantasy sweet was was in a windmill inside. So they went on a date. I thought you were talking about mini golf here. No, no, no. They went on a date. Now he confesses love all that shit. And then they went in a windmill and did it twice banged twice. Yeah, pilot Pete saved some for the rest of them. They made sure to know that it was twice. How romantic is that though, if you're inside a windmill and you just know that all these birds are dying outside from all the blades knocking them down. They also cause cancer, right? True, that is true. Yeah, not a great place for it. Anyways, go ahead. Congratulations on nutting twice pilot Pete. Yeah, sorry that

he noted so fast the first time. And then Tyler C, who's like the heartthrob of the season. Yeah, of course. They don't tell us that. Yeah, they were doing like a little massage session. He kicked out the masseuses and started doing it himself. But then Hannah was like, you know, our relationship is too physical. I like you a lot physically, but I don't, you know, I don't want to go in the fantasy suite because that's all our relationship is. And he was like, that's fine. I respect. I hate you as a person, essentially. Yeah, but he was like, but he, you know, he, he was like, I respect you, whatever. I just want to sleep with you and talk all night, blah, blah, blah. So in the next morning, she was like, yeah,

you know, great night. Like we didn't do anything, but like he was very respectful. Wow. So that was an upset. That was a big time. I'm calling bullshit on that because if a girl says like, I love you physically, but then I don't want to be physical with you, that is that just doesn't make any sense at all. No, he just, she just hates him as a person. And then Jed spent basically the entire his entire date. Tennessee Jed. Is he? Yeah, Tennessee Jed. He spent the entire day shitting on loopy. Like the entire time was just like, I can't believe you're still talking about loopy, blah, blah, blah. I thought you were meaning like literally in the fantasy suite, just like Cincinnati steamer on. No, it's like

it's like a date and they go on a date and then she has the, she pulls out the card and she's like, do I want to, she makes a choice of whether or not to go to the fantasy suite. So on the date, she was shitting on loopy the whole time. It didn't seem like it was going good. But at the very end, he, he somehow slid his way into that fantasy suite and got it on. Got it on. Fuck yeah. Jumping back to the massage thing real quick. I, that would actually piss off a lot of girls if she was getting a massage from a professional and you're like, Hey, get out of here so I can take over. Yeah. You've been to the Toler C though. Yeah. What's he like? A man rocket. Man rocket, man rocket. All right. Last Luke P, Luke P then tried to slut shame Hannah P was like,

yeah, you probably like, cause he's the religious guy and he was like, I'm going to be, he's like, let's talk about sex. I'm going to be a virgin until we're married. Like you probably had sex this week and she was like, what the fuck? Fuck you, Luke P. He just got absolutely shit on. She made him leave. Like basically it was like, get the fuck out of here. I hate you. Like I don't want to talk to you bubble butt. And he was, he did the thing where he like wanted to talk, but she was like, I, I have nothing else. I got, he's like, can I talk? She was like, no, no, but he wouldn't get up and leave. Oh, bad move. Fuck that. And then his final move before he got in the car was can I pray over you? And she was like, no, yes, going to pray on

it. It's a good move. Bless your heart. It always fucks people up. I'm sorry. Can I please just pray on you? She's like, no, get the fuck out of here. She wouldn't even let him pray. Well, guess what? You can, you don't need somebody's permission to pray for him, right? Well, no, if you want to pray on them, pray on them. Oh, he was saying P. R. E. Y. Not P. R. A. He wanted to pray on it. He wanted to creep around outside of it. Yeah. Get that guy out of here. A little, a little, so she went two for four, a little fun nugget for you guys. I know, you know, you're very invested in the season. So invested, but it's come out. It's been leaked that both Pete and Jed have had girlfriends for like the entire season. Oh, so the two guys eating. Yeah. No,

not if it's on TV. I don't think so. Well, Jed, it's in a windmill. Jed is the guitar player. So he told his girlfriend. He's like, oh, I'm going to go try and make it famous. And now he's smart in the final two smart. But I heard Luke P. Did I see some tweets that Luke P might come back? He was in the in the next week on. There's no way Luke. He's done. Yeah. There are a few places where we're cheating is not cheating. I would say a windmill. Pretty much anything that is on a mini golf course, like a clown's head, if you fuck inside of a clown's head, that's fair play. The first night of real world when everyone's like, yeah, I'm here, but I have a boyfriend or girlfriend back home. They get so drunk. Yeah. And then they end up like marrying the person.

Well, so just if you're drunk, if you're drunk, doesn't count. Correct. Correct. Not cheating. So Luke, Luke P. No, Tennessee jet as jetted Pete and Tyler. Got it. All right. Also, if you guys got if you're an SEC football coach in the back of a motorcycle, that's fine too. Also, you can just get re heart. Yes, absolutely. PFT. I'm going to go with. Yeah. Who's the man rocket? Tyler didn't fuck. Yeah, it's fine. He's just saving it up for later. Got it. Good. Yeah. If you know what you know, not fucking is you can't be accused of being bad at fucking. Yeah, exactly. There's she'll be less able to compare him to the other guys that she fucked if there's a little bit of distance in between that smart. That's a smart move. All right. Let's do thoughts

and prayers for big baller brand. Yeah. So what happened? They are selling their shirts that used to be $50 for $5 now. So I'm not a math guy, but I think that's 90% reduction. I never ever saw this coming. It sucks. It's like, you know, you think that the United States is a good place for businesses and for big ballers? Well, not with all this regulation because something I don't know what the problem was the big baller brand because the business plan was solid. They had great spokespeople getting free advertisement all the time. And now they're just relegated to the discount racket coals. Yeah, damn. Never, never saw this coming. The rise and fall of big baller brand. Can't wait for the 30 for 30 on this one. It's going to be a short. But yeah, I can't wait for it to be like

one of those 90 second ones that they play in between a rerun of the OJ one. Yeah, basically once LaVar Ball realized that only one of his sons was good at basketball, then that was kind of the end of it. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. All right. Take quake before we get to guys on chicks. PFC, let's do yours because yours actually way better than mine. Okay. This comes to us courtesy of Twitter user lady pale rider. Cool name. Oh, she says unpopular opinion. White people love dogs so much because deep down they miss owning slaves. They love the owner and master dynamic desperate for something to control. That is heavy. Yeah, that's very, very heavy. Now, very heavy. I'll say this. I don't really control my dog. I actually controls. Yeah,

Stella does me whatever the fuck she wants. We Roy is way, way more in control of this relationship. Yes, power dynamic. Yeah, Stella does literally whatever she wants whenever he could kill me if he wanted to at any given second. And he doesn't because he loves me. Think about it. I actually am a servant to Stella because every day I wake up and I give her food at the exact same time and she goes back in bed and hangs out all day. And then I come home and I give her food again. That's right. Do dogs love being pets so much waited on because they miss owning slaves. Yes, they love they have just butlers to follow them around. Yeah, I pick up my dog shit. Yeah. Good point. Good point. Throw a tennis ball for her. She never gets it. We're getting very mad

about this. All right. Yeah. That was a good take quick. Holy shit. All time. You got to really dig deep. You got to get deep in it. You got to be someone who's who who can't be bothered with mad and ratings as a white guy. I love owning dogs so much because they just love me right. And I just I need to be loved and boops and boops and boops. You forget about the boobs. All right. Guys on chicks to wrap up Wednesday. Dearest cat daddy Hank and PFT. My boyfriend is atrocious at driving. He constantly zones out, misses turns and slams on his brakes at the last second. He also doesn't believe in shortcuts. What a monster. I prefer driving the both of us but sometimes through the circumstance he takes

over. How do I tell him he sucks at driving without crushing his ego? Go bills. You just I feel like this is just one you got to go down with. You can't do it. Yeah. Yeah. You got to just let let him let him be reckless and hope that when he dies you're not in the car. At what point do you get worse at driving as you get older? I think when do you peak? It's like 65 is when you start being like I don't need to I'm going to just go directly into this parking spot without lining it up. I'm going to drive only in strip mall parking lots. Like you get one. I remember my grandfather used to just get from point A to point B solely in strip mall parking lots. You wouldn't go on the road. That's good. Yeah. That's where you get a lot of stuff. That's when

you get old. One other option you could just sit in the back seat and yell at him. You can say whatever you want to the driver if you're in the back seat. True. But if you're side seat that's where it becomes an issue. Yeah sit behind him because because drivers will always always try to save themselves. So if you're sitting shotgun you're more likely to die. That's science. Okay. Hey PMT how long do you have to date someone before you can start wearing your retainers to bed again? Like together you have two retainers? No she probably has like a bedtime like she's probably sleeping with her boyfriend and wants to start wearing her retainer to bed. I got well here's the real answer is after you have sex you can do whatever you want for the rest of the night

because true you're the guy's just going to fall asleep and he won't care what it is you do. True. I was going to say after you talk about the metaphorically like how long in a relationship before you can bust out the retainers and be like hey putting on my putting on my head brace here to keep my teeth straight. Do people actually wear their retainers? I stopped wearing mine. I think people do it at night. Yeah I think so just so they don't grind their teeth. I'm going to say the first time the first time he shits around you like where you can smell that he has taken his shit recently then you guys are safe. Yeah or I mean if we're talking about like moving in together living together uh the second that you start storing feminine products at his house. Yeah

like some tampons. Toothbrush. What have you. Once you're tampon. All time. Once you get it once you make a little nesting spot for your cortex inside of his medicine cabinet at that point you own the house legally. Toothbrush all-time feminine product. Chicks love brushing their teeth. Guys roast. Come on couldn't be me. Mouthwash that's all you need. I just eat like I eat another meal try to get rid of the taste and last little try to boom done. My boyfriend was a great A mama's boy to the extreme. He's 22 and his mom still makes him bring his younger sister along whenever he does anything and his mom makes the conversation cut off because I missed the rest of it. Fuck. Okay well we'll fill it in. No no no no no no no no. Got it. Hold on. His mom makes his little sister watch

when they have sex. Him and his mom. That's fucked up. I'm gonna say that's fucked up. Listen I don't care if you're Ted Cruz what kind of porn you're watching out there. It's not the place of a little sister to watch you and your mom have sex. That's between you and your mom and your dad. Yeah you can you you have the right now to bring this up and be like enough is enough. All right last one. Sup big cat PFT and grizzly bear hank. Nice because I can catch fish with my hands. We can't we can't yet. My guy friends at college told me that they had a thing called a penis reveal when they all moved in freshman year. Is that a real thing or am I dumb thinking that they did that. Why did he fucking let this secret

out. No it's normal yeah I mean I thought everybody knew that before we literally before we even came up with the name for this podcast we showed each other each other's dick. You have to know what you're working with right. I don't know exactly what everyone's got. Yeah it's it's actually a lot like a gender reveal right. You just you pop a balloon and there's a picture of your dick inside. It'd be like not knowing like okay this guy is good with his hands this guy is you know condone this guy can do you need to know everyone's dick size so that if you ever get in a tricky situation you know who to call upon. I think it's weird that women don't show them they're each other like they're vaginas. Well they do when they move in. At the pillow part. At the pillow fights yeah

that's true. Exactly. Okay see everyone. Rye. Love you guys. It's part of my take presented by Bar Stool Sports.