Pardon My Take - Heisman Trophy Winner Joe Burrow, Week 15 Fastest 2 Minutes And Recap

Episode Date: December 16, 2019

Week 15 fastest 2 minutes (2:37 - 9:38). We recap every game from Sunday. The Bills are back in the playoffs, the Patriots made it for the 11th season in a row. Jameis Winston is a Hall of Famer and we feel bad for the Lions. The Texans take control of the AFC South, and the Bears killed Big Cat again. Everyone forgot about the Chiefs, Eli farewell, Urban Meyer to the Redskins? Seahawks Panthers happened. The Blackhole had a horrible ending. Freddie Kitchens did it again but at least he knows how weeks work. Vikings basically let the Chargers lose for themselves and the Cowboys played their perfect game (9:38 - 90:11). Who's back of the week (90:11 - 99:54) and then we welcome on Heisman Trophy Winner Joe Burrow. We talk to Joe about his recruitment to LSU, the whirlwind of this past year, Coach O stories and more.  (99:54 - 117:13)You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, ad-free, on Amazon Music. On today's Pardon My Take, we break our rule, no guest Mondays. For the greatest exception possible, it's the Heisman Trophy and the guy who won it in studio, Joe Burrow, not 24 hours after he won the Heisman Trophy. On Saturday night, he's sitting in Pardon My Take studio. We talk to him.

We talk about coach Joe. We talk about this season, winning the Heisman, everything. We also are going to recap every single game. A couple of great coach Joe stories out of coach Joe. Great ones. We're going to recap every game. We're going to talk about NFL Week 15. We got some things that have, we got some clarity on the league.

We got some big wins, big losses. We're going to do all that in a second, but before we do that, Pardon My Take is brought to you by the Cash App. Not only is it the easiest place to send money to your friends, but it's also the place where you can buy fractional shares of stock with as little as $1. Here's a question for you. Some hypothetical player stocks. If you were given money to invest in any first year NFL quarterback, what quarterback

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Today is Monday, December 16th and we're doing week 15. We start in Seattle where Tyler lock it up, no you lock it up, wedding crashed a few receptions from Russell Owen Wilson. For the Panthers, they say grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac and Carolina grieve the loss of Riverboat Ron by riding their motorboat in Son of a Bitch Christian McCaffrey who put his face right between two titties. Kyle Allen is like that crazy guest who thinks he's part of the family already but he's really just a stage five clinger.

Flannel and football, that's what Seattle does. That was your best recap yet guys. Who let Trey Wingo in the studio, Seattle 30, Panthers 24? Pass me that doobie. In snowy Ganges City where Nancy Drew Lock could have sold the novel mystery of how to complete a past to his teammates and this would be a hard cover for the Denver Broncos. It wasn't the first time Clay Travis Kelsey had a license to run free, not the first time Travis had a bunch of white stuff in his hair if you don't know what I'm saying.

The Rick Hillary Clinton killed Epstein as well as the Broncos last remaining playoff hope. Choked him out with two touchdowns in the blizzard, Chief 23, the Broncos 3. In Nashville where Carlos Menciahides stole Derek Henry's routine rushing for 104 yards in a touchdown, Kenny G Stills wouldn't let Deshaun Watson take any alto saxes. Star wide out Deandre Johns Hopkins lacrosse up the Titans secondary all afternoon long and you can keep planning the parade Texas because Deshaun F. Kennedy Watson avoided taking shots from the Titans defense on the grassy Nolan Nashville.

Texans 24, Titans 21, some spread, he could go. Vambo in D.C. where Terry McClure and Michaels let a washed up franchise that used to be good in the 80s and 90s. The way stars aligned for Cousin Greg Ward as his unlikely performance put a shove into the Redskins side. Most of Dwayne Haskins could have packed it up packed it in, but instead he jumped around and got Eagles betters out of their seats with a last second whip and a whip and a whip and a bum ball as Nigel Brannum could go all the way, Eagles 37, the R-Words 27.

In the frozen tundra where Mitch Hedberg-Tribisky reminded everyone, quarterbacks don't break, they just turn into running backs and Matt Dagey said in the post game, I don't have a quarterback, I just have a player who would be really mad if he heard me say that. Karen Rogers would like to speak to his manager as the up and down Packers offense stalled in the fourth, but the Bears come back fell ten yards short as the Ivy League graduate Jesper Horstead proved that you could get the same education for $1.50 in late chargers at the public throughout library and realizing you should have pitched the ball to Allen Robinson.

Packers 21, Bears 13. We go to Cincinnati where Stefan Happy-Gomor said the price is wrong bitch to the Bengals offense as Andy threw a dull ton of picks to the Patriots secondary. Joe Pesci-Mixon and Darkies Robert DeNardo said to the Irishman Tom Brady, I hear you still houses. The Patriots offense didn't put a lot of great stuff on tape, but they did their job and got the win. Patriots 34, the Bengals 13.

Out in the desert where everyone asked Kenyan Drake who invited you and he replied I invited myself scoring on the Browns defense like they were 18 year old backup dancers. I'm talking to the man in Demir Byrd and I'm asking him to make some plays to the tune of six catches for 86 yards for any kitchens more like daddy kitchens because his ass is fired. Cardinals 38, Browns 24, Buttermilk, Schum. Standing on a corner, James Winston Tampa floated on such a fine sight to see. It's an owner, my lord, whose name is Martha Ford and the fans want her to sell the team.

Come on Perryman, pre-scores we care again and you turn the lights on the lions like you're Sean Merriman. Tampa Bay 38, Detroit 17. In Dallas where Dak Prescott Fitzgerald is looking to bring another star-spangled painter to Arlington. Tyler Higg B's in the trap, B's B's in the trap did his best to keep the Rams offense on track, but it was all Cowboys all day as a law firm of Elliott and Pollard ran up two bills on the L.A.'s rush defense.

Cooper Flip Cup put on a nice solo performance, but Jerry Jones is better when he's drunk and he may be drunk enough to give Jason Garrett a contract extension after this one. The Cowboys 44, the Los Angeles Rams 21. Police are offering up to $38,000 as a reward for help in finding the person responsible for stabbing a dolphin to death. This is just terrible, the dolphin's body was found on Upper Captiva Island in May and that crops he revealed this dolphin was stabbed in the head with an object similar to a spear while he was still alive and the puncture wound indicates he may have been begging for

fish or other food while he was being stabbed. Giants 36, Dolphins 20. We finish in Oakland for the final game in the black hole as Derek Cardi B got up on the stripper pole one last time and had a rumble in the Bronx against Doug Morone's Jaguars. Christopher Moltasaki Conley sat on Raider fans' hopes and dreams like they were a small lap dog crawling under his ass for warmth. Christopher, how could you?

Darren billed that waller covered a lot of ground but wasn't able to cross over into the end zone. Stick to sports boom and don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened. Let us be the last ones to be the first ones to say goodbye to the black hole. It's with a heavy heart I say Jaguars 20, the Raiders 16. And if we could just toss in something for the Sunday night game, no one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills and that's where we will start. The Buffalo Bills Sunday Night Football.

The Buffalo Bills are back in the playoffs. The Buffalo Bills are back in the playoffs. The drought is over. The one year drought. It's crazy to think this was their first prime time game since 2007. Sunday night game. They played a Monday night game somewhere in there. Did they?

First Sunday night game. Sunday night game. It's good to see them in prime time and I guess we can say this is Tredavius White's coming out party. Yeah. Because it doesn't count if it happens in just a game that happens at like one o'clock or four fifteen in the afternoon. Pro bowler.

Unbelievable. Doesn't matter. They know who Tredavius White is and he's really, really good. So the Bills, they, we've said this before, but the Bills, it feels like every game they've had this year has been the biggest win in Buffalo in like a decade, including tonight because they not only get in the playoffs, which if you remember, two years ago when they broke the drought, they needed miracle after miracle to have it happen. This year, they're getting in the playoffs after week fifteen and they got in without

even any Dalton having to beat somebody. Yes. The idea of a home game in Buffalo, of an AFC East crown is still alive. Technically. Because they're going to New England next week and if they beat the Patriots and win against the Jets, I think they win the AFC East. I don't think so. I think I'm pretty sure.

I think if they beat the Patriots and the Patriots have to lose to the Dolphins in week seventeen. I don't know. It's still alive. We have to find out. The bottom line is it's still alive and it could still be alive going into week seventeen, which is just incredible. Yes.

The idea that the Bills could have a home playoff game is it's getting me all hot and bothered right now. Just thinking about the tables that are going to be smashed up there, the shots that are going to be going to be drank out of bowling balls. Hopefully Levy on Bell hasn't got his mouth around those before we get there. We will be in Orchard Park if they get a home play. OK, you're right. The Bills have to beat the Patriots and the Jets and the Patriots have to lose to the

Bills and the Dolphins. That's probably not going to happen. So that's probably not going to happen. It's magic. It doesn't really matter. It's still alive in week fifteen. They could still win the AFC East. That's crazy to even say their, their identity of defense and Josh Allen making some plays

with his feet. And I mean, they have some good skill position players. I feel a little bad for Pittsburgh. The bubble kind of burst on Duck tonight. We still believe in Duck, but that was not his best performance. And I, you know, they're still in the hunt for the playoffs because I think it's them in the Titans now looking for that six seed. The AFC, this AFC playoffs now looks like it's going to be phenomenal because the Bills

are probably going to be the fifth seed and the Bills are a 10 win team in week fifteen and feels like their defense and enough playmaking from Josh Allen, they can play against anyone. They're really good team. I actually think these two teams, the Steelers and the Bills are kind of two sides of the same coin. Yeah. They're built similarly. The difference was Josh Allen played well, Duck didn't play that well.

Correct. It came down to the end. It looked like the Steelers had a chance to send it to overtime, but I mean, once you start pushing in the end towards the end of the game, the Bills kind of pin their ears back a little bit. I love that saying they pin their ears back and they get running down. I actually knew that this game was over when, when Chris Collinsworth tried to explain Renegade. Yeah.

At that point it was like, okay, this, it feels like you just, you made Renegade not cool, Chris. I also want to say for, because we, we love Duck, we love Josh Allen and PFT did do what he was going to say he was going to do. He bet the over, which was very, very stupid, but it was in, it was in four guys, four guys, four Duck, four Josh Allen. You had to do it. I'd rather, I'd rather sacrifice money than sacrifice friendship.

That game was, it was, it was a tough game to like get yards. Every single pull, every single first down felt like a touchdown. And there were just a shitload of fumbles and turnovers in the attacking third. If TJ Watt was as accurate with his punches as Marquise Pouncey was, that game could have flipped the script. He had, he had a clean punch, clean peanut punch to Josh Allen. It just couldn't, could not connect. So the bills in the playoffs, crazy as it can be, I mean, they have like a mini dynasty

rolling in terms of getting in the playoffs. Yeah. Two out of three. Two out of three. That's a mini dynasty. Yeah. How about Big Ben? Can we talk about Big Ben for a second on the side?

He's large. He's getting, he's getting swole. It might be sympathy weight. Maybe his wife's pregnant. I tweeted a picture of him and said beast mode and someone replied more like obesity mode. And I was like, that's not nice, man, but it's also very accurate because that beard. A lot of times guys have the beard to hide how fat they are.

I feel like it's working reverse in Big Ben. It's kind of accentuating how large he is with the beard. People were comparing him to Yukon Cornelius. I was saying he's Yukon cream Cornelius. Okay. That's probably a better way. He's like the, what's the guy from Epic Meal Time? That guy.

Yeah. Yeah. The bacon strips and bacon strips and bacon strips. The bacon guy. I always thought that actually might be Ben. We don't know his name. Yeah. Jack Daniels Sauce.

Is that his name? Yeah. Jack Daniels Sauce. Oh, okay. Nice. Yeah. What is his name? Adam something.

Adam. Sure. He looks like Adam Harvey is what I actually think his name is. Adam Harvey. Like Matt Patricia going in for a job interview. Yeah. Which Matt Patricia will probably be doing. Yeah.

That's probably going to happen. What's his name? Harley Mortensen. Harley. Okay. So I was close. Harley Mornstein. Mornstein.

Ben doesn't do well with Harleys. Okay. No. He does not. Wear that helmet, Ben. Does he still have a Harley? I'm sure he does. Yeah.

I'm sure he calls it as Hog keeps it in his driveway. He probably just works on it a lot. He probably does in his driveway. Don't let him in his driveway. Yeah. Then just like takes it up and down the block when he's feeling antsy. All right. Let's get to the rest of the games.

We'll start with Patriots Bengals. So Hank, which would you rather me do first? The good or the bad? It's to the bad. You want to do the bad? Yeah. Okay. The bad.

If you are watching this game as a Patriots fan, basically all of your fears came to fruition even though they beat the Bengals by 21. I wouldn't say all of the fears came to fruition, but it wasn't reassuring. Okay. So the offense didn't look good. Nope. Against a very bad Bengals defense. One of the worst defenses in the league.

I think they're actually statistically like the second to worst defense in the league. So and then your defense, while great in the secondary again, and I mean the best secondary probably in the league, their run defense wasn't great. Joe Mixon had like 125 yards. So all your fears kind of popped up like, ooh, that's not good, but you still won by 21. Yep. And Keele Harry, the Patriots rookie got a touchdown.

So it's like that. There you go. They're developing. So hopefully they can keep it progressing going towards the playoffs. Also, Julian Edelman might have a knee. That is a problem. Yeah. Major.

That is a big, big time. One of the knees. One of the knees. He actually definitely has two knees. We have two knees, but one of them might be hurt. One of them might be hurt. And so yeah, the Patriots, it's weird watching that game 34-13, but it wasn't convincing because it was a close game in the first half and then Andy Dalton just did Andy Dalton

things throwing four picks. Yeah. Well, it didn't look as convincing because Tyler Boyd technically won that matchup against Stefan Gilmore. I don't know if you saw his quotes after the game, but he said that he felt like he won the majority of the matchups against him. Little fun stat here. Tyler Boyd was targeted six times, had two catches, the exact same amount of catches

that Stefan Gilmore had while covering Tyler Boyd. And Gilmore dropped like two others. Yeah. He could have had more. We kept on saying out loud, why are you still throwing it at Stefan Gilmore? He's the best cornerback in the league and Andy Dalton was like, hey, I'm just going to try this again. Right.

Tyler Boyd brought out the old, the old like, I won the popular vote, but lost the electoral vote. If you watch the tape, I won most of the matchup. No, he picked off twice and he was all over the entire time. Every time that he was thrown your way, it was just a question of whether he would pick it off and run it all the way back or just pick it off and maybe fall down. All right. The good, the Patriots have clinched a playoff for a NFL record 11th straight season, which

is breaking their own record. And to put it into some perspective, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers haven't been to the playoffs in 11 years. The Cleveland Browns haven't been to the playoffs in 16 years. The New York Jets as a franchise have only been to the playoffs 14 times. The Patriots have now gone to the playoffs 11 straight seasons. It is crazy to think like all the sky is falling stuff for the New England Patriots and there's still the two seed 11 straight seasons and we're here talking to start of the show how

the bills like two out of three is incredible that they got to the playoffs. There are two. If you root for the Bucks or the Browns, you have not seen the playoffs in the stretch that the Patriots have of going to the playoffs in consecutive seasons. Right. And before the game even started, things were looking down for the Patriots because Jay Glazer. Let me just say this about Jay Glazer.

If you have a video that you don't want coming out, Jay Glazer already has it and he's going to release it. That's Jay Glazer owns the cloud. I'm pretty sure that he invented the cloud and he just has everyone's nudes. Yep. He's got everything that you don't want to get out there. He's got the behind the scenes of the fake moon landing. Jay Glazer is actually so pissed tape.

He's so damn good at having like three or four stories a year that no one else has because the Rappaports, the Shafters, like all these guys, they basically have the same stories over and over. Jay Glazer doesn't get in that mud. He's just like, yeah, I'm going to tell you when Odell Beckham is going to get traded and I will have the video that no one else can get access to. It's incredible how he does it. He hits like four home runs a year and doesn't give a fuck about being hitting for average.

So the Patriots... Is Adam done? The Patriots in turn, they suspended their videographer. Did you see that? Wait. They suspended the videographer that doesn't work for them. I thought he was an independent contractor. Yeah.

So I mean, that's ultimate accountability right there. Hank, you got, by the way, you got well actually big time by a lot of people who want to talk about employment law because they're like, well, technically Tom Brady's an independent contractor and all these people are independent contractors. I don't understand any of that. Is that true? I have no idea. I have no fucking...

We're all independent contractors. I have no idea. When people start talking about like 1099s and all this shit, I get so fucking confused. I'm like, whatever, man, I take your word for it. They're like four people in the United States that aren't independent contractors. And there's like... It's the richest guy. There's a dozen people who actually understand what any of this means.

Tax wise, whatever. We're not a tax podcast. I think we've... Hank has done his taxes one year out of the four years as a podcast. Two? Yeah. It's a diner. You got a bill streak.

Yeah. Two out of three years. There you go, buddy. Yeah. So we're not a tax podcast, but... So the guy got fired? No, they suspended him. Pinning the investigation.

Even though he's not employed. Even though he's not employed. So that's like Mike Flora, if you want to have an analogy. That's like Kramer getting fired from the Pinsky file that he was reviewing at the place he didn't work. Yeah. So yeah, he's suspended. And also, they put out a statement.

The videographer put out a statement and the Pats didn't even know that he was putting out a statement. Are she? Or she? Yeah. Well, we heard his voice. We did. That video was so funny.

So when he gets caught... Come on, man. Because we can just forget this, right? Yeah. The Pats were probably just pissed off at him because he didn't bite down on the cyanide capsule that he was supposed to. Oh my God. Yeah.

He detonated the suicide vest that had been strapped to him. He... Yeah. He was like... It was hilarious watching it because he did the old fashioned like, hey, come on, like, I'll go my way. You go your way. It's not what it looks like.

Forget about this whole thing. Yeah. And then come on. We're way past that point now, buddy. Yeah. Okay, we're in the shit. He buddied him. Yeah.

When you get buddied in a confrontation with some kind of security guard, you're in trouble. So I believe now that the Patriots were definitely filming the sideline for some sort of reason. I don't know why. It's probably not a reason that we think of. Belichick is so far ahead of everybody else in game planning and knowing what to look for that he probably had them filming something that the average person wouldn't look at and be like, oh, they're catching them doing X, Y, Z. Right.

They're too advanced to get caught is the problem. It's actually, yeah, that's true. I actually watched, and we're going to talk about Urban Meyer a little bit later, but I watched an interesting clip where Urban Meyer said he would always watch the opposing head coach and see when the opposing head coach, he'd know if the opposing head coach would ever get in the huddle for special teams and he usually wouldn't. And if he would watch him, he'd basically line up against them for the entire game. And the minute he got into the special teams huddle, he knew a fake was coming.

So like that kind of stuff that you don't even think about the game within the game. I love that shit. What if it was just like of the cheerleaders on the sideline, just guy stuff? That'd be cool. That'd be awesome. Yeah. I still think this was all a plan to get everyone to doubt the Patriots and get the story off of the offense so then they can rally behind it.

I mean, it seemed to work today, right? Yeah. They had a lot of Gilmore luck out there. They, they went 34, 13. That's if you just look at the score, they're back Hank, how are you feeling against the bills next week, Saturday, four o'clock prime time for Saturday ish. I'm so excited. I'm so excited.

I'm so scared. Okay. That's fair. All right. Next up, Bucks Lyons. Jamis, you have to re-sign Jamis. He is, he broke another record this week, by the way. He broke two.

So he was the, yeah, actually, yeah, because his first quarter, he had 221 yards, two touchdowns and an interception. He had the famous Jamis where he threw an interception on their first drive. Love that. He also is the first quarterback in NFL history to throw back to back 450 plus yard games. He's a Hall of Famer. No one else has done that. So yeah, his first quarter stat, I guess Peyton Manning threw for 247 yards at one point

in the first quarter. Okay. But again, every stat that we've seen, if Jamis isn't setting a record, he's coming in second to Peyton Manning and all of these. He ended up with, what was it, four touchdowns, 458 yards. He's amazing. As long as he doesn't have to throw anywhere in between seven and 12 yards, wherever the linebackers are, he'll be fine because he's thrown nine interceptions now this year to

linebackers. Yeah. Just the linebackers. He is linebacker blind, but everything else. And he didn't even have Mike Evans and he lit up the Lyons. So I'm thinking maybe Bruce Ariane should start to allow his players to stretch at some point because they've lost Mike Evans. Now they lost Godwin with a hamstring.

But they also feel like a team where you could take any cast off, any wide receiver that maybe was drafted in the first round somewhere else that didn't work out. Corey Coleman, where are you at? You could put them on the Bucks right now and just be like, go run nine routes. Jamis will get you. And Jamis will find you as long as you're not in between like 10 and 17 yards away from them. So there's a point where Jamis, at this point with Jamis's career, I think the Bucks have

to either franchise tag him or resign him outright. And they have to hope like a mid 20 year old guy because Jamis is 26. He's going to be 26. Like you hope at some point, you know, you'll maybe slow down a little, maybe don't get so blackout drunk all the time. Like maybe Jamis will just mature out of interceptions. Nothing will really change except he'll just get a little bit older and he'll stop throwing back.

You're trying to change him. You're like a girl. It's okay. He's a bad boy. I think I could make him mine. I'm like, hey, Jamis, why don't you try on this sweater that I bought you? It would look really nice on you. Maybe don't just wear this jersey all the time.

Maybe don't cheat on me every weekend. Yeah, right. Like just, just maybe, you know, think a little bit before you throw it blindly into the linebacker level every single game. Well, the good news for us is he's never going to stop doing any of that and it's going to be great. Right. It's going to be awesome.

And the Bucks, I want them on the bears. The Bucks aren't as bad as we thought that they might be at the start of the year. The Bucks, it turns out, they're a perfectly average football team with a perfectly hilarious quarterback. They're going to, they're living in hell because they're going to end up eight and eight or seven and nine, not a great, not a great draft pick, have to, have to keep Jamis because he's played good enough. He's broken records and do it all again next year and all glory to God for every single

one that he's done. I showed you guys that after it was shocked. It is crazy. He, he thanked God a second time for someone else. Well, he thanked God probably nine times in the span of about what, two minutes and a half minutes. So this was like a little bit of revenge for all the Christians that got killed by the lines.

All right. So we need to talk about the lines real quick. There was a sell the team sign in the end zone that made it on TV. Is that what Antonio Brown was saying? No white woman, 2020. Correct. Get rid of the Ford Ford. So sell the team sign sitting in the end zone.

We're selling those shirts, by the way, shout out to our guys, Mike, Lenny and Sully. They are on radio in Detroit. They've got the sell the team going. We were selling those shirts, but the sell the team signs in the end zone, bags on heads, the lions. We just talked about the Patriots and how they've won, you know, gone to the 11th. Hold on. By the way, this is a Barstool JJ is on the news.

Okay. Nevermind. For what? That's crazy. He rescued a dog. Shout out Barstool JJ. Good for you. Go follow.

I don't know what his, what his Twitter handle is now. You're a J.J. in the Bronx. You're a J.J. in the Bronx. Go follow him. It's an awesome viral story and you can donate. That's our shout out. He's on the news, right? This is like the new Sunday recurrence.

Yeah. Just people we know getting on the news. It was a great story. He rescued a dog that walked into his house and it was like mistreated and he's rescued it, brought it back to life, whatever. All right. The lions, back to the lions. That was the short intermission.

That was crazy. Sell the team bags on heads. We talked about how good the Patriots are as a franchise. The lions, everyone talks about the Browns being the worst franchise. The lions are the worst franchise in the NFL and I feel really bad for Lions fans, even though I root for a team in their division because what they go through is hell on earth. They have one single playoff win in the Super Bowl era. Do you know that 1991 was their only playoff against, was it the Redskins?

They beat the Cowboys and they lost to the Redskins in the NFC championship. They have, the Browns have six, six wins, playoff wins. The Lions have one playoff win in the Super Bowl era. That's insane. They have two Hall Fimmers, Calvin Johnson, Barry Sanders, who literally quit with gas in the tank because they're like, I cannot be on this team anymore. Well, the tough thing is, even if she does sell the team, you know who the richest person Detroit is?

It's Dan Gilbert. So you want the winning history of the Cavaliers. I mean, they at least have a championship. Yeah. You can find a LeBron. It is LeBron could come to Detroit and win one for Dan and another sport. Make them a tight end. He, listen, I'm just saying, I feel bad for, for Lions fans.

They deserve at least a little bit of like a hat tip of the pain and suffering they have to go through and how shitty this organization is and how much they've tormented their tormented day in and day out. There's a saying in Detroit, SOL same old Lions and it applies every single year. And I really think the only thing they have going for them is the Honolulu blue is awesome. It's an awesome color. Also Matt Stafford isn't bad. No, he's not.

But he's a Hall of Famer. He's another guy Hall of Famer who he's going to ruin. Like that will be the best quarterback they've ever had and they will never win a playoff game with him. That's true. They will have had a Hall of Famer. Well, they might win. We don't know if they're not going to win a playoff game.

There's some words on the street that Stafford's injury is maybe something that's a little bit more serious. Really like a bad back injury. Like really bad. He might like, Hey, might be not worth similar to Calvin Johnson and Barry Sanders. Hey, might not be worth just going out there and getting your ass kicked for the for Martha Ford. Maybe just have your health and your money.

Well, they say that the brain actually controls a lot of the physical aspects of your body. And if you have an injury and you have to go back to being on the Lions, your body is a beautiful thing. It has a way of shutting things down. If you know that you're going to be in trouble long term. So maybe he's not in a good mental state, meaning his back just won't heal correctly as kind of a defense against himself for going back and play. And it's Alliance.

It's, it's, so Alliance fans listening to this, we, we don't feel your pain, but we're acknowledging your pain and we are supporting the sell the team because there's really nothing worse than having an owner that just will never, and Martha Ford's like a billion years old and she just sits there and is like, okay, you know, I just like having the, the Lions. I like owning the Lions. Well, the thing is, I don't think that she really has fun. She's owning the team. No, she likes knowing that she owns the team.

Well, the story always comes out. I mean, this, you know, like how, how disappointed she is that they keep losing. Well, well, I mean, your whole life is a disappointment then because they lose every single year. They're the same old life. Would she even like it if they won if they were playing meaningful games in January? It's sad. So people Detroit, uh, we support the sell the team movement and that, that sucks. When you have the bags on your head, that's a bad, and, and I feel like this has happened

a hundred times in the last like 20 years, the bags on their head and they fired Jim Caldwell who we made our Jim Caldwell jokes, but they went to the playoffs. Yeah. And Matt Patricia has been Hank. Is it okay if I say that they probably should clean the house there? Start to the top down. I don't know that you can. All right.

So sell the team and then decide. We'll work on it. There you go. So yeah, I'll say this about Matt Patricia. If you're a rocket scientist that's getting your defense outsmarted by James Winston, it's a problem. It's an issue. What do you, what do you want him to do?

True, true. Um, all right. Uh, Texans Titans, the battle for the AFC South, uh, by the way, if you want to watch this, you want to watch the Heisman Trophy sitting in part of my take studios. You can do it at barstowgold.com slash PMT barstowgold.com slash PMT. So the Texans now have gone statement win statement loss statement win. And that sums up the Texans perfectly. They just flip flop.

They went, they beat the Patriots on prime time. They lead an egg against a bad Broncos team and then they go into Nashville against the hottest team in the NFL and beat them second hottest beyond the Ravens and beat them in their building. Uh, and basically like a million turnovers in this game and to Sean Watson played. Okay. Right. The weird thing about this game, it wasn't, we've all been waiting for the Ryan Tannehill

bubble to burst. It really didn't burst. No. Just the Titans can't play from behind and they were down 14. Nothing. Well, it's that. Yeah. There are a lot of ugly turnovers in, inside the red zone.

Yeah. And that was bad for us because I know we both had the over on it and it should have hit. It absolutely should have hit 100% there's three pisses me off right off the bat in the red zone. The good news is Rables got it figured out. He said after the game, we need to do a better job of preparing, coaching and playing. That's it. So some are close.

Yeah. This is a, this was a style in in game situation game where it's like if the Titans don't have that interception that basically they're going into score and they give up the interception on the goal line, Texans bring it back all the way to the Titans 20. That game is completely different. I want to put one in the ear hole of Roger Dell and the schedule maker because I don't like. Oh, I love it.

I don't like when the division ends, when you play the same team twice within the last three games. I love it. They should do it on aggregate, if anything, because I don't, you're playing the exact same team twice. Sometimes a team can be totally different at the start of the year than they are at the end of the year. I love it.

I like spreading it out a little bit. No, I like, I like this because now we just get to do it again. It was a good game. It was a fun game to watch. There was, I mean, it wasn't like a perfectly played game, but it had action throughout and now we can do it all again. But is it possible for a team to play another team three times in the span of four weeks? Yeah.

If they made the playoffs, right? I would just get sick of those colors. That would be so sick. They made the playoffs. I don't think it would work out exactly. Oh, actually, it could. Yeah. The Texans could make the threes, although the Texans have to lose to get the Titans

in so then they probably wouldn't be the three seed anymore. I know we'll figure that out at some point in the future. It could happen. And all I'm saying is I would get sick of those two colors playing against each other. I would like that very much. And then the Titans. Yeah, I don't. It was the biggest game of the week that felt boring for some reason.

Right. Did you feel the same way? Well, it had action. The games in Nashville always kind of have that feel. It's the color of the grass. Yeah. The color of the grass is kind of the grass is depressed in Nashville. Yeah.

And it just doesn't have the same juice that other games. Maybe because they haven't. It feels like they haven't had a primetime game, not on Thursday in a long time at home. That's probably true. They get the annual game against the Jaguars, but I don't recall. I don't remember the last time I saw them on like a Monday night. So the Texans, we can't figure them out. They're just going to keep basically just depends on what week the playoffs start for

on off of a statement loss or a statement win. Right. They should actually try to lose week 17. I said they're going into the playoffs on a high note. Bill O'Brien doesn't look well. No, he looks unhealthy. He looks like he's got some combination of a liver disorder and gout. He's kind of like he's got this weird yellowish skin to going on him right now. And even in a win, he just he looked like he was kind of done being there on the sidelines.

Yes. But yeah. And then Vrable had the he chased the refs off the field, which I always love because whenever you're a fan and you're in your coach, chases the refs off the field, it feels like you you kind of won in a weird way. She's like, yeah, like there was something wrong there. Yeah, we got that. Brian Flores is great at that. Yeah, really great at that.

Last thing about this game, Deandre Hopkins continues to be incredible. And I feel like sometimes we like lose the fact that he's probably the best wide receiver in the league. Here's because every time he catches the ball, it's electric. Here's the problem with the wide receiver debates going on right now. If you say something really complimentary of one of them, you'll have people in each year. So you say something nice about Deandre Hopkins, you'll have somebody be like, dude, Julio Jones is clearly the best.

Well, you had an unbelievable day. Yeah, clearly. Michael Thomas is the best receiver in the NFL. I don't know. A lot of great receivers. Every time Deandre Hopkins catches the ball, you're like, he's going to the house. He just he seems loose all the time. All right. Next up.

Bears Packers. What happened to this one? I got a million times. I didn't catch the end because I tuned out in the middle of the fourth quarter when it looks like the Bears were already done. OK, I'm not I don't complain about refs. But if I were to be someone who is going to complain about refs, all I'd say is it's hard to beat a team and the refs.

Yeah, well, that happens with the Packers a lot. You have to expect that. I don't understand. I don't understand how you can have kick catch interference after the kick returner clearly catches the ball and is holding the ball and then call kick catch interference. That makes no sense to me. Did that lead to a touchdown?

Yeah, it did. And the Bears could have scored off of the fumble that happened on that play. Game was under protest. I tweeted that during the Joe Burrow interview because I had to get it in. I had to get that in. Yeah, I don't I don't know why I believed that the Bears could do it. They this game was basically the Bears season of microcosm because they died a million times and then came back to life a million times,

including the last play where Alan Robinson walks in for a touchdown. If Jesper Horst said pitches them the ball. It's a classic rugby player walks in. If your outside center gets it, you pin that last defender. You hit your wing streak and I've seen it a million times in rugby. You denied us, Jesper, of having the excitement of scoring a touchdown and then the disappointment of completely fucking up the two point conversion. Well, that is what would have happened.

And I wanted that. Yeah. Also, there are so many screenshots now of like Alan Robinson. He progressively gets wider and wider and wider open. I can't wait for the ultimate to where he's going to look like he's six yards open instead of four. But yeah, Alan Robinson definitely would have walked in for that last touchdown. But I'm going to give you a little bit of good news coming off this game. OK. I think Aaron Rodgers sucks.

He does suck. I think Aaron Rodgers sucks now. The back. Rodgers sucks. Aaron Rodgers looks like you know how every single year that Aaron Rodgers gets injured, he comes back maybe two weeks too early. He sucks. And he's a show of himself in those games where he comes back early. That's what he looks like all the time now. I said during the game, I would rather have Trubisky than Rogers in that game. And I was only like 80 percent joking.

Right. Like that would that's a lot less. Yes. That usual. I'm usually 100 percent joking when I say that shit. So by by Aaron Rodgers saying like we're going to win ugly, he's getting out in front of the story. So no one is drawn attention to the fact that he sucks now. OK. He's saying we win ugly. That's what we do.

Him and Matt LaFleur do not look like they're having a good time together on the sidelines. Nope. Yes. They remind me of if you go to dinner and you see a couple that's maybe 50, 60 years old and they're at the same table and they don't talk, they're still on a date. They're still making time for one another. Yep. But they don't talk the entire time. They probably say more words to the server than they do to each other.

That's what LaFleur and Rogers are kind of putting off right now. And it's crazy because the Packers are probably they might end up as the two seed. Oh, wait, PFT. OK. So what you just said, I agree with everything you said. My ultimate fear is is I can see it. I can see into the crystal ball and I am scared shitless because maybe the Packers do just win ugly and maybe that's kind of what they do. You know teams who do this, where it's like it's never going to look good.

The Patriots have that vibe going right now, too, where it's like they just win ugly, they find ways to win games. If the Rams beat the Niners next week and then the Niners beat the Seahawks in Week 17 and the Packers went out, they're the one seed and that playoffs go through Lambo. It's not crazy. No, it's not crazy. So now my ultimate fear is being like coming up in front of my face where the the Bears held the Packers to the lowest amount of yards that they've had in the series and the two game series since 1991.

They lost both games because they can't fucking score and the Packers are not good. And I've been sitting here saying their frauds and I'm going to probably keep saying that until I'm in fucking Miami being like the Packers aren't good, but they're in the Super Bowl. What the fuck is happening and I'm going to lose my mind and you're going to have to put me in like a mental ward. I agree with you. I think that the Packers aren't good, but they're very good at being bad,

if that makes any sense at all. So they are able to win the ugly games every single every single week. I look at the Packers box score and every single week, I'm like, well, Blake Martinez made another 12 tackles today. Their defense isn't great, but it's also not awful. Another game where two of the four quarters, they don't score a point. They basically disappeared in the fourth quarter, let the Bears come back. And I don't know why I care about sports.

It's so fucking stupid every year. I I really did sell myself on the Bears making a mini run here. And I thought maybe they could beat the Packers and keep this thing alive. And I'll just finish with this. Packer fans, you're probably so happy right now. You're so happy that I was wrong. You're so happy your teams 11 and three might be the one seed. You're so happy that, you know, you might win ugly and get to the Super Bowl.

And I just maybe admitted that, but I'm going to say this. You did not eliminate the Bears from the playoffs today. The Vikings beating the Chargers eliminated the Bears in the playoffs. You beat yourself actually. The Vikings eliminated the Chargers, not the Packers. Yep. Because if the Vikings had lost, the Bears still would have been alive. So RIP, the in the hunt graphic, it was a fun run.

I don't know what the Bears do. It will be very interesting. The fact they did not flex out the Chiefs Bears game next Sunday. They just did this to piss you off. Just that's the only reason there's going to be the graphic. They might actually not even play the game. It might just be the Patrick Mahomes, Mr. Miski graphic the entire four hours.

You know what, I'm excited that they did that, though, because the ratings for next Monday's show are going to be so much higher because that's going to be a prime time loss for you. And people are going to love to see you in Miski's next day. Imagine they just kill the Chiefs and I'd sit there like, oh, what could have been? That would almost be worse for you if there's one next. Oh, yeah, I have to. I have to like give it's over.

They are actually eliminated. And I know I'm saying that. But like, what if, you know, what if something happened to one of the teams and they couldn't play in the playoffs and they had to have altered it? Right. So you guys are going to be the first alternate heaven forbid. Like what I'm just saying, what would happen? Like if there was a California earthquake, there's would have to play.

Yeah, they'd have to step in and then they could probably run the test team. No one wants to see it, especially in bare weather in January. It was too cold today for snow, as you pointed out, which sucks. It blew Brandon Walker's mind when I said that it can be too cold for snow. As a as a Packers owner, I just want to say my level of concern with the state of the franchise and Aaron Rodgers is somewhere between Arthur Blank walking menacingly behind the head coach on the sidelines and Jerry Jones walking menacingly behind the coach on the sidelines.

I'm going to go crazy. It's like I'm I'm living. I'm living what about Bob and I'm Richard Dreyfus and I'm just going to go crazy being like the Packers aren't good. They're frauds and they keep winning games ugly. And I was like, hey, no, they're pretty good. I'm like, no, they're not. No, they're not. Watch the games. They're not good. They're not good, but they're not.

They're not good, but they're very good at being bad. God damn it. I'd rather be good at being bad than be bad at being good. Was that Trentofer thing? You just know that it makes it inside my other brand. Good at being I'd rather be good at being bad than bad at being good. If you make a poll, I guarantee you 80% of the people would say good at being bad over bad.

I'd be bad. You would not want to be bad at being good. Don't want to suck at being awesome. Yeah, you want to kick ass. That's true at being a piece of shit. OK, let's go to the next game before we do that. A quick word from our friends at Sheevis. I said it right. Leading blended scotch whiskey,

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And please just buy some Chivas so that we buy it all out. So I don't have to screw up the pronunciation anymore. That would be that's too much to ask. That would be nice if everyone were just buy a bottle and say Big Cat sent you and you get a discount. That's not true, but just do that. OK, Broncos Chiefs drew Lock Regression game. Yeah, well, small hands in the snow, small hands in the snow and yikes. He stunk. He was under being under 50% as a passer in the NFL in 2019 is gross.

It's tough to do. But this is the run that Andy Reid goes on every year that we talked about. I think this is what fifth game in a row that the Chiefs have won. Well, I was going to bring that up. It does feel like the Chiefs are kind of the forgotten team in the AFC. And because Mahomes has not been Mahomes as of late. Although today he finally was like old Mahomes, he was awesome today. And they their defense is a lot better than it was last year.

The defense is awesome today. Yeah, their defense Megan plays Mahomes is back. Like this is the team that I feel like we're going to get to January. I'm like, oh, yeah, I remember the Chiefs. Remember, they were the one seed last year and had the MVP. They're pretty fucking good. Remember, Patrick Mahomes is in 99 in Madden. Yeah, yeah. They're going to win 12 games.

They're going to beat the Bears next week and they're going to beat the Chargers at home in Week 17. And Arrowhead is not an easy place to play in the playoffs. We can get the one seed. I know you get the two seeds. Sorry. When Andy Reid is standing in the snow, like the nice thick flakes, like Madden snow that was going on today, when he's in the snow and his blinking kind of slows down, he looks like a wise old owl.

Yeah, just like focusing despite the elements. And guess what? Guess one of the only two teams that have beaten the Ravens this year. Oh, yeah, it's the Chiefs. So the Chiefs have beaten. They lost the Texas, but they beat the Patriots and the Ravens. I feel like we've forgotten about the Chiefs. Hank, it looked like you had something to say earlier.

Well, I was going to say the completion percentage when snowing that much. Yeah, but Patrick Mahomes was playing in the same snow and was exceptional. He was the MVP. His home snow. Yeah, I know. I know. No, I know. True luck regression was going to happen. I mean, there's nothing that you can't bank on anything more than a guy being awesome early on in his career, like having an unbelievable game.

And then probably spending the entire week hanging out with his friends, going to clubs and being like, this is sick. This this league is easy for me. What do we talk about with Lindsey Vaughn? There are different types of snow, right? Colorado snow is different. There's corn. City snow. There's corn flakes.

Yeah, that was crispy. That was crispy, that thick. It was nice. That was like fried. That's that's Andy Reid type snow. Right. Andy Reid definitely keeps like a six pack of diet coke in the snow on the sidelines for himself. So he yeah, he. Oh, man, I wish he did the dilly bar.

Remember Dilly? Yeah, yeah. That was the best. He ate ice cream in the snow in Minnesota. Beers that I made outside turned out he just needed it for like his blood sugar. He's like diabetic. Really, this is so funny. So fat he can't not eat ice cream in snow. Like, no, actually, he's doing that to save his own life.

Yes, the chiefs for the forgotten team in the AFC. That's like one of those wildlife videos where you're like, Oh, look, how cute it is, these otters are holding hands. Well, they're actually doing that because the third one got attacked by like a sea wall. Yeah. And they're trying to survive. Yes, they're basically trying to get themselves to safety as fast as possible. They're actually doing that because they both have debilitating otter STDs. It's so cute, Dilly Dan.

All right, Dolphins Giants Eli. Yes, he's back to 500. What a beautiful game for Eli. So he's back to 500. It's his farewell game again, depending that if Daniel Jones stays injured, he will obviously have to play the last two games and week 17 is at home. But he's like a kiss reality tour. You just keep saying this is Eli's last game

and his family will keep going out to the games. I'm happy that he had this moment. I really am. I don't think he should play next week or the week after. He should go out like this. He won. It felt good. He threw three interceptions as Eli does.

He also pft. You know why this game was so perfect? Not only because he got to 117 117, because of this game, Eli Manning has now thrown an interception to 31 out of 32 teams. The NFL, the only team he hasn't, the New York Giants. So perfect. So it's it almost was like a destiny that he had to have all these things happen where he retires when they're playing the AFC East

and Daniel Jones gets hurt and he gets to play against the Dolphins. And he throws a couple extra interceptions on top just for good measure just to make sure that it really counts. So he threw three and it, you know, the crowd was going crazy. It felt cool. Pat Schermer probably saved. He probably he's like the anti-Makadou in the fact that they're the same exact coach, except he honored Eli, the living legend and Ben Makadoubi did not.

I would like to see a Mr. 3000 type of comeback for Eli where one team brings him back to play just against the Giants. Yeah. He can throw one interception against them. Get everybody. Yes. Collect them all. Yes.

Yeah, it was cool to see Eli out there. I don't know if he's done, though, because Mr. Marra after the game, when they were asking, what was it like seeing Eli, you know, one last hurrah for a sweet prince, Eli. He said, well, you guys are making an assumption that he might not be done. Oh, wow. So Mr. Marra, his voice carries a lot of weight. So either we'll get Eli playing on a different team next year.

Fingers crossed to throw that one interception, or they might have him struck the rest of the year. Need it. I mean, Pat Shermer should be fired, but I really do think his treatment of Eli could save his job. He was nice enough to Eli that Mr. Marra will definitely put that in his pro like he's going to make a pros and cons list after the season. It's like cons. He lost basically every game.

He's a terrible head coach, situational football awareness, zero. He keeps talking about how we have a young team, but none of our young players get better. He's totally incompetent and a real moron pros. He was really nice to Eli pro. He has a face that isn't quite as punchable as Ben Macadoo. Yeah, there it is. Yeah, boom. I mean, when you look at Pat Sharmer and then you look at Ben Macadoo next to him,

Pat Sharmer does look a lot better as a head coach. Yeah, Ben Macadoo. He doesn't try to slick his hair back and turn into some sort of like door to door vacuum sales person like Ben Macadoo did. Yes. Ben Macadoo actually did the Drew Lock thing where he had a small stretch of success. It was like, guess what? Now I'm bad ass Ben.

Yeah. Now I'm ready to call all the shots with a tiny little door to my office. He forgot. He forgot he was Ben Macadoo from Pittsburgh. But there's a poll now on the TV. We're reading the TV for the second time. Should Eli keep playing? Should Eli play again this season and keep playing versus sit him out is basically 50-50.

49, 50. Yes, 50-50. I love this poll too because the people who say sit him out are just saying that so he can stay 117 and 117 and the people who want him to keep playing just want to keep playing so we can keep doing the Eli farewell tour. And he does have two games left so he could conceivably end his career at 500 or even at 500 with two more, one win, one loss. Oh, people are, oh, it's a retire play somewhere else.

So yeah, he's going to, he should, I want him to play somewhere else. Fuck that. Let's say something nice about the Dolphins. Devonte Parker signed a new deal and was good. I have no idea who their running backs are. So they'll never let me down in daily fantasy. Yeah, two games in a row and met life. No coaches to my knowledge on that team have been videotaped doing cocaine.

There we go. And that was say something nice about the Dolphins. The field is going to be in really good condition for the Super Bowl because there's definitely not going to be postseason football. Yes, they have not quit. Well, sort of, but they didn't sort, they sort of quit. They sort of quit, but not really. They quit despite them trying not to quit and being instructed to quit.

Right. All right. Next, they're really bad at quitting. Oh, Saquon looked good again for the first time since like week two. I know he's been injured, but I also, I've put this in my tickler file, PFT. I don't want people to think that this is Saquon bashing because I do think Saquon is a special talent. Do you remember last year when basically everyone was like Saquon's the greatest

running back of all time? That seemed a little premature in retrospect. Probably need to, you probably need to have him prove it a little bit. Well, wait, wait, big cat. What happened? What was the difference between last year and this year with Saquon Barkley? Eli Manning was his quarterback. Yeah.

What was the difference today? Eli Manning was his quarterback. He needs Eli to thrive. Just saying I, I have that in my tickler file. I know that everything's stacked against him. He doesn't have a good offensive line. He was banged up this year. Here's my hot take that I'm waiting to unveil on, on Saquon,

which I'm going to just say right now. Sometimes he just doesn't get the easy yards. He's one of those guys. He tries to hit a home run. He tries to, you know, he tries to juke everyone out. Like just go forward, dude. Just go north south. He thinks it's still college.

He thinks he's going up against Rutgers saying that that will be a future conversation. I'm not saying it now. I still think he's very good player. His legs are too big and they're too big of targets. He also, it's also hilarious that the giants used the top five pick on a running back. That will forever be funny. Very, very funny idea.

It's a very funny thing. Okay. Question for you. PFT. Oh no, we don't need to see key question because we did it with Joe. Do you still want to ask me a question? Yes, I do want to ask you a question. Do you like Dwayne Haskins now?

Dwayne Haskins keeps improving. I hate him forever. He keeps improving. You hate him forever because of the play, which is very James like at the end of the game where. He just threw it backwards. He could have thrown a Hail Mary and he just tossed it backwards. He was in the grass,

but he probably should have just taken the sack and gone down. Throws it backwards. It gets returned for a touchdown. Eagles cover the spread, making all of us who continually bet against the Redskins look very. The Redskins covered for 60 minutes. They covered for the entire game. They literally covered for 60 minutes. That's unfair.

That's illegal. I want to protest. I want, I don't know what we can do, but that should, that was the right bet. And Dwayne Haskins just decided to just throw the ball backwards for no fucking reason. I didn't even have on my radar because the Redskins were covering. They were threatening to win this game. They were pissing me off how closely they were.

They were coming to win in the game. Do you think that just Urban Meyer up in the booth watching that last play? Yeah. Do you think that gave Urban Meyer fake heart attack? I think it might have a brief one like a heartburn. Why? Okay. Urban Meyer.

I know why Urban Meyer is going to these games. I think he went to a Cowboys game a couple of weeks ago as well. He's doing it because he loves to be talked about as like, oh, Urban Meyer to the NFL and he wants to be in the buzz. Why does anyone think that Urban Meyer would be good as an NFL coach? His, his strengths. He's good at ignoring bad things that are happening off the field. To me, that's, that's a big part about being a good NFL coach.

His strengths are he is one of, if not the best recruiter of all time. Like he, he basically made Ohio State and SEC team with his recruiting ability. And he is also a great motivator of like kids, 18 to 22 year olds getting that, you know, if you watched basically Urban Meyer play against Michigan at any point, he's got kids from all over the country thinking that Ohio versus like fighting there for their lives for the state of Ohio. Like a kid from Florida is like, I need to win for the state of Ohio. That's Urban Meyer's doing.

What is he also really bad at? Taking losses in stride. He basically has a heart attack every time he has a loss. Do you know what happens to the NFL? You lose games. You don't get to go 12 and one every single year. And DC. So I, DC would kill him actually.

Urban Meyer in the NFL makes no sense to me. It doesn't make any sense, but it also kind of does make sense because NFL owners just want to throw money. It's crazy. So yeah, he probably won't be a great NFL head coach. No, he'd be bad. He would die. But he would, it's, he still makes sense about the fact that he might become an NFL.

I could absolutely see him coaching in the NFL for like one year and being like, no, not for me. Urban Meyer would be saving in the NFL. No different. No different. He's a control freak. He, you know, he is a motivator who makes every game feel like life and death. You cannot do that in the NFL. He would not be good in the NFL.

So it's crazy that any team, now it's not crazy because there's dumb owners, like you said, but it's crazy. Anyone who watches football understands football understands how good Urban Meyer is as a college coach would ever think that would translate to the NFL. Yeah. So I think that he, I'm trying to talk myself into being excited for Urban Meyer coaching the Washington Redskins and I shouldn't be, but it's like he coached Wayne Haskins. Nope.

They've got that connection. Nope. I don't know. Nope. Nope. I don't know. Nope. I'm starting to think about it.

Nope. He's a bad human and I don't like him. I shouldn't say he's a bad human. Well, no, you could say that. As far as I know, he's not, he's not a great human. Oh, here's another good reason why he'd be a good head coach in the NFL. He's great at not spending time with his family. Yeah.

So that's like number one on the list of things that you need to do as an NFL head coach. He's got that contract. All right. The other side of this game, the Eagles, so they're still alive. It all just goes to that. I've read like a million different, like win-loss scenarios for the Eagles and Cowboys and it really just like anything can happen. It just all matters about next week.

Yeah. That's it. That's it. So Carson Wentz was for all the shit he's been getting all year. He was awesome in the fourth quarter in that game winning drive. He's throwing to Greg Ward Jr. as his primary receiver. He's a quarterback. He's got no one left.

And on top of all that, Eagles fans, you're going to hate that I'm about to say this, but Miles Sanders is getting dangerously too good to the point where he will obviously get injured. Oh, come on. Like you can't have the Eagles season the way it's gone. As soon as a player steps up, it's like, this is the guy we can now trust because Miles Sanders is that guy now. He's their best player on offense. Like besides probably Zach Hertz, skill player.

He is now in definite danger to get hurt and have Eagles fans be like, are you serious? Another injury? I keep waiting for Arthaga Whiteside to play really well because he got such a cool name. He can go up and get the jump ball. Yeah. He seems like a guy that that would be a really good wide receiver just because he's got such a badass name that you like to say it. Right.

And you want to see a name like that in the stat sheet showing up. But every time I look down on him, he's got like one catch for 11 yards. Not good. Yeah. Not great. So the bottom line is the NFC East is just going to come down to who's next week. And right now it looks like the Cowboys. I don't know.

Week to week, you can't count on the Cowboys to show up next week like they showed up this week. I'm pissed too at the NFL because this is going to sound crazy. But I actually would have liked to see the Eagles Cowboys in prime time. I know we've seen that 10 billion times in the last 10 years. But that I can't believe it in flex out the bears who are eliminated from the post season. Yeah. It's crazy. Again, I think it's just to fuck with you personally.

It's a personal fuck you. Okay. So the Eagles win again. All matters next week. One last note. Tara McCallarn is awesome. And if you're a Redskins fan, just by his jersey. Yeah, he's really good. He'll probably get hurt too.

That one handy catch that he had. Yeah. He's awesome. Sick. Whoa. You just whistle. I tried to. I can't.

I'm not very good. Can you whistle? Hank, can you whistle? That's this. Okay. By far. Now you've got a swarm of birds attacking you. So annoying.

You're just going to do this on stereo. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. That was definitely the most annoying part of the podcast. And we've mentioned the TV twice when people can't see it. And American Ninja Warrior hasn't even started. That's right.

We're not loopy yet. Seahawks Panthers. This is the game that when we were talking, doing before the show prep, I feel like I didn't even see a play from this game, even though there were a lot of plays. I saw two. I saw two plays in this game. I saw Josh Gordon with a deep perception.

I saw DK Metcalf catch a ball. And that's about it. It was. I think I saw Christian McCaffrey with the ball at some point. Well, it was a taking care of business game. Seahawks just had to go win because we all expected them to. They win. They went East though and they didn't cover.

Yeah. Well, they pushed, but they shouldn't have pushed because they gave up 14 points in the lap. That was a classic. Seahawks didn't want to win by too much and screw up the statistical anomaly of an 11 win team having like a zero point differential. So they were like, well, we got to let them back in it. But this is a game that essentially meant nothing because it's like the Seahawks held serve

and the Panthers are long been eliminated. And all that happened was everything we know was just confirmed. Russell Wilson is awesome. The Seahawks defense. Maybe a little iffy. Some injuries. Kyle Allen sucks. Well, yeah.

And Christian McCaffrey is awesome. What I learned about Kyle Allen over the last three weeks or so is that Moxie is a finite resource. Yeah. So when you come into the league with Moxie, when you're when you're just shooting Moxie out of your eyeballs, you have probably eight to nine weeks to use up all your Moxie. And in that eight to nine weeks, you better become actually good. And so his Moxie got drained and now he just sucks. It also Moxie runs out a lot faster when you have small hands.

That's true. I shouldn't say he sucks either, though. I feel like I'm I'm jumping all over him. He's he's a serviceable backup. Yes. But he's not like the Moxie has run out to the point where you're like, he's clearly not a starter. That was just Moxie.

Here's what my Moxie got. Kyle Allen should have faked an injury a couple of weeks ago and finished the season on a relatively like, hey, that guy was okay. He could be a starter. Yeah. The Morris tape he puts out there, he's hurting himself as like a backup for the next 10 years. The only guy I can think of that made a career off Moxie at quarterback is Brett Favre. Yeah.

And he had to sell like three inches of his dick to do it. He had all the Moxie. It was it was coming out everywhere, especially when he was puking up all the pills. He had Moxie just flowing out of his crocs. Yeah. All right. Jaguar's Raiders. This was so fucking sad, man.

This was so sad. I was so sad for the Raider fans. Black Hole done meltdown fourth quarter. The Jaguars were playing for nothing when Guerrilla Rilla. Did you see him at the end of the game? I did. There's nothing sadder than a sad Guerrilla. Derek Carr went up to him like he was the president.

It was incredible to like pay his respects to to a man, a grown man in a Guerrilla costume in the stands. Yeah. And Derek Carr was like, I got to go. I got to go see Guerrilla Rilla one last time. And I went and I looked. I found, of course, Guerrilla Rilla was quoted. He Guerrilla Rilla.

Did they quote Guerrilla Rilla? No, they quoted the guy, but he is Guerrilla Rilla. I wish it was just from Guerrilla Rilla. I I feel even worse for Guerrilla Rilla because Guerrilla Rilla is and again, for people who don't understand what we're saying here, it's Guerrilla Rilla. It is a man who has dressed in a Guerrilla costume for the last 25 years and gone to every Oakland Raiders game. He is very relatable because he is a future future Guerrilla Rilla guy problem.

So he said it was quite emotional. My eyes started to tear up a little bit knowing these were steps I walked around in my younger days and now it will not be no longer. For me, I must say I have been in denial for the last three years when it came up that they're moving, but it finally hit today. It hit me someday when I walked up the steps. The error is coming to an end. So Guerrilla Rilla, much like anyone who's has anything they don't want to face head

on, has spent the last three years being like, they're never going to move. This is fine. And then today, like a ton of bricks, our sweet prince Guerrilla RIP. That makes me so sad that Derek Carr went up. It's actually kind of funny. Derek Carr is a guy that got killed on a field, went up to a Guerrilla in the stands. It's the reverse Harambe.

Yes. Yeah. He's he Guerrilla Rilla. Man, it's sad. It is very sad that you see they're throwing nachos onto the field in protest. Somewhere Guy Fieri cries a single tear. How many, how many followers do you think Guerrilla Rilla has? I would say 15,000.

18,000. Pretty close. Damn. Guerrilla Rilla. I'm going to fall. I'm going to give Guerrilla Rilla a quick follow. I want to see what Guerrilla Rilla does with the second part of his life. With his move to Vegas.

I think you have to. Yeah, this is tough. So I mean, it really, if you're an Oakland Raiders fan, this is your big chance to do something crazy and say, you know what? Fuck it. I'm going to go to, I'm going to live in Las Vegas. Yeah. Or I'm going to root for the Seahawks and actually win football games.

Or the 49ers. Yeah. Or the 49ers. But the black hole is done. It went out in just horrific fashion. That game sucked. Well, it also went out in true black hole fashion because Gardner Menchie said that he's never seen as many middle fingers in one place

as he did today. Yeah. And it went out as the Raiders. They died as they lived. And they losing a horrific home game and flipping off your opponent. Right. And the last time they moved from Oakland, they also lost. So this is tradition.

As is tradition. Yeah. And hey, here's a spin zone. If you're a Raider fan, wouldn't you rather leave? It's like leaving vacation on a rainy day. That's actually a great point. You don't want to leave vacation when it's beautiful out and be like, man, what are we missing?

You want to leave on a loss and have Mintre Mania pop back up in the fourth quarter and your offense just puked down his leg. Right. So if they had made the playoffs this year, let's say they even make a run in the playoffs. You're probably really happy with the way that this last season went. It's like one last magical run for Al for the flame. For the flame. And yeah.

And then. March on Lynch is lighting blood. And then they moved to Las Vegas. At that point, if they start to really win in Vegas, building off what they started in Oakland, then you're like, fuck that. That's not their team. Right. At this point, it's like, OK, they sucked this year.

They weren't good. Didn't make the playoffs. Ended with a horrific loss at home to the Jacksonville Jaguars who are on their own losing skid. It's easier to say goodbye. Yeah. You just had breakup sex and you knotted in like 30 seconds and it was awkward. You caught her cheating on you with Vegas. Yeah.

It's like, all right, fine. You know what? Get out of here. Easy to pull the Band-Aid off this. I was just sad for them. I mean, you have just a bunch of people. There was that one guy who said, I spent all my kids Christmas money so I could be here. Dad of the year.

There was black hole. I mean, that's that's exactly what you expect out of the black hole. That and in a couple of weeks ago, the guy that said, I'm missing court to be here. Also the black hole. So we we as sports fans have lost something by losing the black hole. And yeah, that's it. Shout out Gorilla Rilla. I have a question for you, big cat.

Yeah. Is Leonard Burnett fat? He's thick. I think he's getting fat. No, he's thick. I think if I don't think you could be because remember when he breaks out, yeah, yeah, you can run. No, he'll run fast at times.

You can't be fat and run that fast. I think you can to a certain extent. No, I think he's he's just real thick. He's borderline fat, but he's thick still. I mean, you can like Jerome Bettis was fat, but he had quick feet. Yeah. He had beautiful feet, but I don't think he also never. He never outran anyone.

Right. I don't think that Leonard Burnett is that type of body where he'll be able to sustain. That's fine. But he's not fat yet. He's he's borderline. Speaking of borderline. BMI he is. Yeah.

Thick fat guys. Remember Zion? Remember that? Like, what is he? Where is he? Mm hmm. He's coming up the whole year. Really?

Yeah. Jesus Christ, dude. Bust. Fucking bust. Another Duke bust. Big time. All right. Before we do the next game, stitchfix.

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Send directly to your door and you get 25% off. Stitchfix.com slash PMT. I cannot recommend it enough. Brown's Cardinals, let's discuss. Freddie Kitchens, you're done. You're fired. You're fired. You're fired.

We would think that he would be done. But we are not the Browns and the owner of the Browns Haslam said that Freddie Kitchens is not necessarily going to be gone. All right. They're putting their trust in Freddie. Okay. So I have some counterpoints to that. First up, this game.

Cardinals defense. They said barring something catastrophic. Okay. Well, here was this a cat. Here is a catastrophe. Maybe you decide. Cardinals defense is giving up the most yards in the NFL, the third most points. The Browns scored 17 points.

They scored a touchdown late in garbage time. They scored 17 points against the defense that's giving up the most yards in the NFL. The Cardinals offense scores 20 points a game. The Browns gave up 38. And not only that, but the Cardinals offense doesn't, isn't very good at rushing. They're middle of the pack, 110 yards rushing game. They gave up 226 yards on top of all that. Kenyan Drake in the last 25 games before today, he had four rushing touches.

Today, four rushing touchdowns. He has 10 rushing touchdowns in his entire career. He just went, he like, well, I don't know what's the math on that. And then one, one of the four today, so he has 14 now. One of those was on the whoop, whoop, whoop lateral against the Patriots. Insane. Insane how bad the Browns looked, how bad they're prepared, how bad everything on top of all that. Freddie Kitchen has gotten a fight with Jarvis Landry on the sideline.

I don't know if I call that a fight. Well, they were, they were, they were pissed off because they were losing Jarvis Landry and Odell Beckham had the worst body language I've ever seen. They both were just sitting there with their hands in their heads, like what the fuck is going on? And then here's the kicker, Freddie Kitchen's after the game. He said, quote, I don't care about my future as a Browns coach. He's literally firing himself. Well, no, what he said after the game was he was saying that like his job is to prepare for next

week. No, his business is not to worry about whether or not he's going to get fired. He said, I don't care about my future as Browns coach. So if he doesn't care, just fire him. And then he did do one thing right for everyone out there like, Hey, say something nice about Freddie Kitchens. He does know how the days of the week work because he said, I'm going to show up Monday and do the best job that I can do Monday. And that's tomorrow.

Fact. So there you go. Say something nice about Freddie Kitchens. He knows that tomorrow is Monday and Monday is when he's going to show up. He's got a calendar. He's the kind of guy that knows that remembers his days of the week based on what the specials are at the local belly. I don't.

It's Meatball Monday. So it's going to be a big, big one for me. I know that you don't want to fire a coach after you just fired a coach and it's like the revolving door thing and everything. There are two questions. Two questions you have to ask yourself whenever you're thinking about firing a coach. One is, am I going to be able to get an upgrade over this guy right now? The answer is yes.

The second is, would anyone else hire this guy as a head coach? The second he hit the market? Probably not. Third question with the Lions, maybe. Third question is the coach having the team very ill prepared for every single Sunday and did he have one of the players bash the opposing team with his helmet in an act that the NFL has never seen? In an assault that the NFL has never seen.

Also, yes. Well, it's assault period. Assault. To me, that's more like assault. I like how you've given that tweet. Oh, yeah. I tweeted all the time. No, I know, but he didn't sound like that.

Yeah, but that's how I think it's like. No, he yelled at the assault. There's no exclamation point. Yeah, I know. Assault period. To me, the period made it funnier because he was like assault. No, he yelled, though. He yelled at the screen.

He was like, he might have typed something different, but I know how chefry. He was like, that's assault. That's assault. And then he tells everyone around him. Isn't that assault, guys? That's assault. That's technically that's assault. Well, Freddie Kitchens is not doing himself any favors by becoming more and more swollen

as the year goes on. He needs to stand up desk. Freddie Kitchens needs a treadmill on the sidelines. How about he needs to not be an idiot all the time? That would help, too. That wouldn't help his bloat. I don't care about my future as Brown's coach. I think what he was saying with that quote was pretty obvious.

He's ready to fire himself. He was just saying, like, that's not my job to worry about. Correct. So then just fire. So then just fire him. If he doesn't care, just fire him. I don't think he's saying he doesn't care. No, I know.

But just fire him. Just fire him anyway. Just fire him. Because you can just say that. Be like, hey, dude, remember when he said that? It doesn't matter how he said it. So it's a paper trail for HR purposes. Yeah.

It's like, dude, he resigned. He didn't care. You do not care. He literally resigned today. I know what he's saying. Like, he doesn't actually care. Like, it's not his job to worry about it. The funny thing is that in a vacuum, the Browns should be happy with a seven and nine season,

if that's where they end up, right? Like, seven and nine for the Browns, that's not bad for that franchise. But it is. I wonder if Odell Beckham requested a trade to the Cardinals. They gave up. Probably not. I think that's where he would probably draw the line on that one. 226 yards rushing to the Cardinals.

Four touchdowns for Kenyon Drake. Kenyon Drake won the first game that he's won. He had a 14 game losing streak, 11 games this season. The 2008 was it? The Lions are popping their bottle of 211 right now. Kenyon Drake has won a game. There you go. Yeah. So next week they have the Ravens.

Odell Beckham is probably just going to defect to the Ravens. Like, like a Cuban player, like a Cuban pitcher at the World Baseball Classic. Yeah. He's going to lock himself in a hotel room in Baltimore. He's just going to be on the other sideline by the end of the game. Yeah. And just, and, and be like, yep, this is the team I play for now. I have a question for you though.

Am I super crazy to think that the Browns still aren't that far away from being a good team? They're very far away as long as they don't have a head coach. Right. I'm, I'm, take Freddie kitchens out of the equation. Let's just say it's urban minor. No, they have a lot of talent. They have a talented roster. Yeah. I just, they, their line needs work.

They're the Browns. And they just shop is really, really good. I also think you got to, I don't know what you do with Odell Beckham, because I feel like you might want to move on from that. This is crazy to think, but the Browns might be one of the most attractive head coaching destinations for next year. Yeah. Absolutely. How weird is that?

They have a franchise quarterback. They're ready to go. But you have to, you have to obviously change a couple of things. And I do think you, the Browns have to, I don't know what Odell Beckham's contract is, but they have to move on from that, right? Because he's not happy. I think he's not happy. I think with Odell, he's just, he's going to be happy if they win.

No. So like if you get rid of Freddie in the off season and you bring someone else in that you think can win, then Odell is going to become happy pretty quickly. But they, the Browns have the talent to be a good offense. If they run the ball and, you know, like basically their identity should be running the ball, running the ball, running the ball and then play action pass and not having to force the ball to Odell, Odell Beckham down the field. Like they shouldn't be trying to throw down the field constantly because they don't have

the offensive line for it. I just, it's weird. The whole thing just doesn't make sense. They run too much 11 personnel. Yeah. They need their tight end back. That's what Warren Sharp told us. So I think that Odell would probably be happy not getting the huge stats that he's put up in the past.

You don't have to force the ball to him. Just give him a summer. Let him spend the entire summer on a boat. Just be like, Odell, we know that you love being on the water. Go hang out on a boat for the entire off season. Come back. We'll have a new head coach. We're going to win football games.

I'm pretty sure he's going to be happy at that point. He just, he doesn't like losing. He takes it out on, on the nearest kicking nets and Gatorade coolers and dumb ass head coaches. He's also not like he has not played well. That's also like, I was definitely on the side of the Odell gets unfairly criticized because he's very passionate, but he has not played well this year and he might be injured and that's fine.

But I don't know. It just feels like, you know, you're trying to force something that's just not going to work. I think giving up on Odell Beckham right now. It's not giving up. You're going to get something for him. Yeah. You'll get something for him. But I still think that whatever you get for Odell Beckham probably isn't going to be as good as Odell Beckham at his peak.

I don't know. I mean, I think the league has shown that like the way to build a team is not through like premier wide receiver. Well, they, they, it's a nice add-on. They obviously need a lot of other things. They obviously need to rework the lines. So if you could trade Odell Beckham for pieces that would make your line better, you'd have to do it, right?

For three offensive linemen or draft picks or whatever. Yeah. I would trade Odell Beckham for three above average offensive linemen. Yeah. So there you go. We just fixed the Browns. Okay. You're welcome. And Fire Freddy kitchens. I just, I feel like there's no point in having that type of wide receiver if you have other

problems that are, you know, that you can build like the roster construction doesn't really make sense to me. That's what I'm saying. Well, Swagger Jr is still undefeated at home. That's true. That's true. All right. Next up Viking Chargers. The Chargers had seven turnovers.

That's pretty impressive. Phillip Rivers is, he's gone to the old crotchety man point in his career. We all have grandparents and people who are aging that sometimes just say, shit, whatever comes to the top of their head. That's how Phillip Rivers plays football right now. He just says, fuck it. I'm going to throw it wherever I want to touch it. I'm going to, I'm going to fumble whenever I want to fumble.

He just throws it straight down the center of the field as high as he can, as far as he can. That's, that's 25% of his offense right now. Melvin Gordon got benched for fumbles, which you don't really see in the NFL very often. It's not like the, that's kind of a college thing where it's like, hey, this guy can't play because he's going to put the ball on the deck. Like Belichick knows not to bet. No, Belichick just cuts him. He just straight cut you.

But Melvin Gordon, that was a weird move to bench him. It's like, probably you want to play your best players. So sometimes you don't have sticky hands. Yeah. It was, it was one of those weird games where the Vikings didn't really have to do anything. They just had to let the chargers fuck this up. I will say though, Denil Hunter is awesome. Or sorry.

Yeah. Denil Hunter for the Vikings. He's the, I think he's the youngest guy to get 50 sacks and he's, he was a force all day. I think he had one of the, I think he had the strip sack. He had another sack. The Vikings defense looks like it can play with anyone. They got a big game next week against the pack. How bad would it suck losing your best player on offense in a game that you were going to

win anyways, even without him? Oh yeah. So Dalvin Cook is out with a shoulder, right? I don't know if it's a shoulder or if it's the fact that he was holding up an oxygen mask to his ear at some point. He got high. Yeah. He got the bends.

Ben Rothesburgers definitely held up an oxygen mask to his ear at some point. As a telephone. Yeah. Well, no, two of them at the same time. Yeah. Yeah. Trying to like listen to the band air. We, you said this to Hank.

I'm going to give you credit for the Dalvin Cook screwed so many people in their fantasy playoffs. Was it you two? No, I'm actually out of, in all my leagues. It's not that you care, but I do care. Oh, I care. A happy Hank is a happy life. You guys are out too.

If anyone out there cares. No, no one cares. We'll bleep that out officially. Not officially. We have Drew Brees, but. How many points did you drew to throw tomorrow? 50, I think. 50, you can do it.

You can do that 50 burger? It's a culture. That's no problem. Yeah. That, that does suck. That's why fantasy is the dumbest because you might have the best team all year. And then you get to the fantasy playoffs and Dalvin Cook goes out with the shoulder injury. Or you went against Ken and Drake who had four touchdowns.

Yeah. That too would start. Yeah. Someone picked up Ken and Drake and was like, Hey, I'm going to start this guy. It also sucks if you're the minister of Vikings and you go to the real playoffs and Dalvin cooks out. Yeah. That would also suck.

So the Vikings, the Vikings are the classic team where they could be good, but it's still Kirk Cousins. Yep. So who knows? They are going to get to the playoffs though, PFT. I know the done chain, which I apologize for. It's true. You did.

You did. I apologize. They are going to get to the playoffs though because the Rams lost and let's go to that game. The Cowboys, that was an absolute ass kicking through and through. The Cowboys basically did everything that like has been promised with this Cowboys roster and how talented they are. They did it all today. You know what it was.

Jason Garrett played the team a highlight reel of some of their old good performances before this game. He did. Got them believing in themselves again. And then Garrett went out and had a first half to remember. I actually took a video. Maybe we can make a video out of this because I've got all the clips. Of him on the sidelines throughout the entire first half.

I think they showed him like nine times and he didn't say a single word while he was on camera. How long do they show him for? Well, some of the clips for three seconds, some were up to 14 seconds. Jesus. Where Jason Garrett was just staring off into the abyss, not saying a word. Just let his guys go. Let the players do the talking. Um, the big news though of this game outside the coin toss, which it does it.

The whole defer thing, like why everyone knows that you should just say we either want to kick or want to, like you should just pick. Yeah. We're going to either kick or we're going to receive and then flip it on the second half. How pissed off do you think James was to find out that someone discovered how to commit a turn over before the game even starts? Yes. Yeah.

That feels like something. But then New York got involved and it ended up not happening. So they, they, they, they righted that wrong. Is it technically gambling to, to do a coin toss before the game? What do you mean? It's kind of gambling, isn't it? I call heads or tails as he flip a coin. Just something that Godel should look into.

Okay. Um, the big news though of this game, Skip Bayless pulled the Zikers. He out of the trash. What? Yes. It was in there this whole time, the whole time, the whole time that trash can in his kitchen with no, no trash bag in there. He went in there, he walked into the kitchen, he opened the trash, uh, and he pulled out the

Zikers. I love it. I didn't see that. Yeah. So that's, that's, that's a big turn. I know as Miss Elliot going to be happy, I don't know, back on good terms. I don't know. I think Skip Bayless just has trash.

He uses trash cans like you or I might use under bed storage where you put the stuff away for the winter. We're not going to need or something that, you know, we're not, we're, we're done wearing, but we're not committed enough to get rid of. Yeah. Skip doesn't seem like a guy who uses like anything in his kitchen. No, not, not dishes, not maybe one mug, but other than that, he never, he's always eating out.

He's always, you know, yeah. Ernestine's pretty happy. Yeah. So the Zik jersey comes out of the trash. The Cowboys are back on track somehow. And on top of all that, I'm sitting here. I watched that game. I see how good the Cowboys look.

I'm like, they might have a home playoff game. Are they going to be a tough out? Yeah. And that would be so stupid. They win a playoff game, maybe two and Jason Garrett is coming back baby. They had two rushers over a hundred yards. Everything worked. Like literally that was the perfect game the Cowboys played from start to finish.

And well, that's what I've been kind of saying about the Cowboys is locking up Ezekiel Elliott might be the smart thing to do before you lock up Dak Prescott because the team kind of goes as Ezekiel goes. Although Tony Pollard had more yards in him today. Yeah, I know. But the running, the running game is important. Yes, yes, I agree with you. Dak is a great quarterback right now.

He's better than Carson Wentz. Where do we stand on that? Carson Wentz played better today, I think than Dak did. I don't know. I think he's better right now. We're going to find out next week actually. We're going to debate that forever and neither we're going to win anything. Once and for all, we'll find out who the best quarterback is next week.

Also, this game would have been totally different if Jared Goff didn't hurt his thumb. I think we can all agree. He banged his thumb on a helmet. So that's very early on. The Rams probably win. They cheated actually. Yeah, the Rams win if Jared Goff doesn't hurt his thumb. Did you know that Sean Lee's nickname is the general?

That makes sense. Yeah, it's such a nickname for him. This is not a bloody knee. He was running around. It's like. I think he just always has a bloody knee. This time it was externally. Yeah, right.

No, it was it was actually an upgrade for him. Right. If you knew that you knew that that just needed a bandaid, not, you know, surgery and nine months of rehab with Sean Lee. If you can see blood, it means that you're still intact internally. They said they're Sean Lee's playing like a young kid out there. The general. Yeah.

Fuck Sean Lee because he's a shitty insurance policy. Good job. All right. Last game and then we're going to do quickly who's back and then get to Joe Burrow. Falcons 49ers, the stunner of the weekend. Wait, going back one second to the Cowboys game. Yeah. I hate the fucking afternoon games in the sun.

You saw it too. Yeah, it was weird. The sun in the Cowboys stadium. They wait until I don't know how they do it with the roof and the windows on each end. It just sucks. Mr. Ray Baker. Yeah. You'll find out about that later.

Wow. Way to step on Joe. I didn't I didn't ruin anything. You did. I don't think they'll know. Sun. It's a tease. Okay.

The Joe Burrow interview is coming up in a second. All right. Falcons 49ers. Last game of the weekend. The shocker of the weekend. 49ers. This was such a letdown spot for them. We talked about on Friday going, you know, being on the East Coast for two weeks,

playing the Ravens, playing the Saints, winning against the Saints in an awesome game, and coming all the way back and having the Falcons, the Dan Quinn revenge game against Kyle Shanahan. And I don't know. I mean, this was, do you throw this out as saying this was just a letdown spot or are you like, hey, this is actually concerning for the 49ers? I mean, it's actually a huge win for the Seahawks and the Saints. Yes.

Big time win. And the Packers. Yeah. Yeah. So Dan Quinn helped out the entire NFC, helped out every team that he hates probably. Yeah. By winning this game. My takeaway was that the Falcons should just onside kick every single kick that they have.

Yeah. Ever. Yeah. So that was the other one that happened. They should do what Dak Prescott tried to do and say that they'll kick in both halves. This, it was crazy. It was another one where if you had the under in this game, I don't know how many apologies I can give you because the Falcons scored 13 points in the last four seconds of the game.

And it was insane. I had the over and I had put that one to bed. You still didn't understand it after you explained it to me four times. Because they took the, they, they changed the channel after that touchdown. Right. And they had just scored. And they just scored. So I was like, okay, that's the end of the game.

Yeah. And then somehow you guys keep yelling at me that my bet won. Dude, you won. Yeah. You won. I still don't believe it. So the one problem I would say for the 49ers in this game is that Greg Kittle is so fucking good, but he might be the only guy that is worth anything when it comes to throwing the ball.

He had in through the first three quarters, Jimmy G had 15 completions, 12 of them were to Kittle. That's insane. That is pretty great. He had 131 of the 142 yards in the first three quarters passing. That's crazy. And he had that pancake block where he was just laughing. He was doing the Rob Gronkowski where he wrestled a guy into the end zone.

And then the camera calm just smiling his ass off as he was getting a horse. He's an absolute beast, but it's like you got to have someone else who can help him out, who can help Jimmy G out. And that would be my only concern if I were the 49ers. Yeah. But if you can run the ball, man, you'll Sanders. Yeah. I don't know, but we're pretty good.

He's pretty good. If you can run the ball and then, and then hit Greg Kittle every now and again, that's all that offense really needs though. Yeah. But the defense is pretty good. Losing to the Falcons at home is, is bad. I'm saying like, do you think this is something? Cause they didn't, they couldn't really run the ball.

So I'm going to call it a trap game and move on. All right. All right. I'm just wondering where you lit. Like you see these games and I agree with you. It's a bad spot. It's a trap game. I had the Falcons, but there were also some things

where like that, that feels bad for a team that the whole, you know, has Super Bowl aspirations. Like if they can't spread the ball around and they can't have other guys help out in the passing game, they become pretty one dimensional. Right. I think that last weekend's game was probably more instructive than this one. So their game against the Saints, our big concern about Garoppolo was he can't play quarterback when you want him to be a quarterback. Right.

He can play quarterback with a leader with a tie game and he actually got into a duel with Drew Brees and they ended up winning the game. So I think that's probably more indicative of their future in the playoffs, I would say. Yeah. A lot's going to come down to whether or not they get home field advantage, which they kind of screwed up. Yeah. So they got to win out now.

All right. PFT, why don't you do a couple ad reads before we do a quick who's back and then we'll do Joe Burrow and send everyone on their way. So our first ad is coming to you from Peloton. I'm not going to be able to do the Peloton halftime show, Genesis halftime show on Monday night. We're going to be doing a live meet and greet kind of a watch party here in New York. I think it's all sold out, right?

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Rugby? USA. USA. Rugby is, well, kind of back. They put up a good fight this weekend. Uh-oh. What, they put up a good fight? That didn't sound good.

They put in a, they put in a, they were put in a really tough pool because it's the second tournament of the year. So in their pool, it was them, Fiji and South Africa and Japan. So we beat the show Japan and then we almost beat South Africa and then we didn't beat Fiji. Okay. Sorry. USA won the president's cup down in Melbourne. Oh, another thing I don't care about.

The president's cup. I was trying to follow along. I was confused by the scoring of it, but it was, it seemed like. Hey, can you just do this, do this entire segment with the Australian accent? I was very confused. Uh, the, the details were a bit muggy, uh, but it seemed like the U.S. came from behind and had a exhilarating win. Thanks to Tiger.

Apparently we just win this thing every fucking time though. I don't think so. I think so. I think Rory and the boys. No, Rory's not allowed to play. It's not, it's. That's Bollocks. Yeah.

You're thinking of the Ryder Cup. Right. Oh. It's everyone. It's Bollocks, Europe. I am thinking of the Ryder Cup. The president's cup is an entirely different thing all together. It's, uh, it's everybody outside the, you know, your kingdom.

It is. Right. It's got early years from South Africa. Yeah. So it's stupid. We just kicked the shit out of every, we made a tournament just to like, actually, I kind of like that. Never mind.

Yeah. To just beat the world to win every single time. Oh, hey, rest of the world. I dare you to play us in football, real football. Kick your ass. Yeah. The, it's been around since, uh, 1998 it's saying. I thought it was the Ryder Cup.

I'm not going to lie. And we've, they've only won, the rest of the world's only won once. Good. So we literally just created, we're basically the big brother where we're like, hey, you want to play a game, like want to play one on one. And one time we let the rest of the world win. Okay. I liked that a lot.

So we're back. Also, my who's back and we doves dovetails on that because Patrick Reed is back again. Yeah. So aside from the whole sand wedge thing where he was just kind of brooming out the sand trap before he's in the shot, his caddy, who it should be noted is his wife's brother. Right. Because he's the kind of guy who's only friends with his wife and her immediate family. Correct.

He tried to punch an Australian fan who was giving Patrick. No, he pushed him. Shit for cheating. Yeah. So totally out of line by the Australian fan to call it Patrick Reed for cheating. That you can't, you can't get mad at Patrick Reed for cheating. That's what Patrick Reed does. It was also such a sorry, not sorry.

He's like, we get so much shit all the time. So yeah, I went up to the guy and I pushed him. What? And then I walked away. Worst thing happening might spill the little beer, which I absolutely will not refund him for. Yeah. He is. There you go.

I'm pretty sure that Patrick Reed and his wife are related in some way because that's an exact thing that Patrick Reed would say. So yeah, he got off his golf cart, pushed him down, got sent out of the tournament, got sent home. And then I don't know who his caddy was. I was hoping that Patrick Reed's wife was going to be his caddy for the last round. That would have been great. He brought him to do it himself because he has no friends.

No friends at all. No, he probably had to have like whatever the course, like some like 18 year old kid. Just found a guy on the parking lot. Because isn't it summer there? He put, yeah, yeah. So he's probably, did they, did school, did they do summer vacations? Do Australians go to school? No.

No, they do summer vacation right now? Well, yeah, because you don't have school. That's crazy. Why are you getting mad at somebody for starting a fight in Australia? Agreed. Two things. One, if you live in Australia, that's how you say hello. Give somebody a good crack.

Push them, they're beer. Oh, he, boom. And then you punch them. That's like shaking their hand. Nice. Number two, if your, if your boss is Patrick Reed, you should be allowed to blow off steam by fighting anyone you want. Agreed.

If you have to deal with that shit 40 hours a week. Double agree. Double agree. So I think we all agree. Fair play. All right. My who's back is Christmas parties. Everyone be safe this week.

There's always, it's always interesting going to your office Christmas party. Don't be the guy. I think we've talked about this. We don't be the drunkest, but also don't have fun because it's awesome to have. Here's the, I think places should start during Christmas parties in January because this is like too many Christmas parties happen right now where you get Christmas party overload. Give them a little treat on the other side of January 1st. Or like in the summertime.

Yeah. Just revolutionize the Christmas party. There are no real holidays in the summer. So why don't you have an Australian Christmas? Yeah. There's also a way for your boss to like cheap out because the, all the, all the restaurants are a lot cheaper to have a Christmas party in like January 10th. My mind just got blown in Christmas in Australia. Do they celebrate when it's hot outside?

Yeah. That's what I was saying, dude. The fact that they're like the summer Christmas, that's crazy. That is nice. You just brushed right by the fact that like they're on summer break and it's also going to be Christmas. That's crazy. Yeah.

It took me, that was delayed on. Thank you. That was like me absorbing the 49ers Falcons over. Yeah. Appreciate that. That's fucking wild. I know. So Santa Claus is, does he wear cutoffs for when he goes down to Australia? Is he like tear away his pants?

And he's like, yo, it's short Santa. He has a, yeah. He's got a like a tank top underneath and a Hawaiian shirt and he takes it off. He rides his surfboard. God damn, that's cool. All right. Here he is though. Joe Heisman, Joe Burrow.

He's got the Heisman trophy literally sitting right in, way heavier by the way. I almost threw my back out. Yeah. The Heisman trophy and the low man trophy were in the same room for the first time in history. Fuck. It was cool. So here he is, Joe Burrow, awesome interview and we'll see everyone on Wednesday.

Love you guys. Okay. We now welcome on a very special guest. I think if you're watching this, you see how special he's got the Heisman trophy on the table. It is Heisman trophy winner, Joe Burrow, Louisiana State University, fresh off his Heisman, less than 24 hours. Biggest landslide in Heisman history. Does that feel good?

It does feel good. That feels good. That's pretty sick. So you've done probably 700 interviews this past, like what, three days? Yeah. Are you completely sick of it? Yeah. I've got probably eight hours of sleep the last three nights.

Okay. And yeah, absolutely sick of the interviews. What's the most annoying question people keep asking you? Oh, I keep, I mean, after the speech last night, I've got what does Coach O mean to you about a thousand times? I love talking about him, but you can only say how much he means to you a couple of times. And we're probably, you know, the biggest Coach O guys out there. We love Coach O. We've loved him for, you know, ever, ever since he probably when he took over

the interim spot at USC, we're rooting for him to get a big job and we were all behind him. So we know, we have a pretty good idea why you love Coach O so much. I'm going to switch it up on you. I'm going to ask you about a Coach maybe you haven't been asked about as much. Your offensive coordinator, Inzmigar. Yes. So he is a football guy through and through. More football guy than me or Coach O that nobody knows about.

That's hard to, okay. You know, so last night he was, so I was on the, in the aisle and he was on the far end of the row and I look over and he's got his big old dip, dip in his lip, spitting into his empty water bottle at the Heisman Trophy ceremony. Now you don't know definitively that Coach O didn't have a worm in his mouth because he has done that before. So we'll say for right now he's a bigger football guy than Coach O, but we don't know 100%. I guess, I guess, I guess you never know with the worm.

Yeah, right. Has he done the worm for you guys? He has not. Have you heard that story? I have not. Okay, so he basically, when I think he was, what it was, he was in school. Can you tell the story about the worm? Is that true?

Yeah. So what happened? I did it in the spring game my senior year. It was kind of funny after the practice, we had a spring game the next day and I was looking for worms on the field. My coach, coach, coach, coach, my nickname, baby, baby, what are you doing here? I said, coach, I'm looking for some worms. He goes, and there were some worms on the field.

He goes, okay. Well, here's the big one here. He said, baby, you going fishing? I said, no, coach, I just got a little motivational speech. I'm going to get the team. So here's the deal. So we had a big deal that night in the spring game. It was my senior year.

I was the team captain and I got up and I said the story. There was two men fishing in ice holes in Alaska. And one was catching fish and the other one and he looks at a guy. He says, man, hey, how do you catch it on that fish? He said, man, I'm using worms. He goes, I'm using worms too. He said, yeah, but I need to feed my family. He said, the only way I know how to feed my family is catch these fish and I got to do

whatever it takes. He said, I'm going to tell you my secret. Those worms got to be real warm before you put them on the hook. He said, I keep them in my mouth to warm them up. Then I put them on the hook. And I said, you know, just like that fisherman, do whatever it takes for his family to feed his family. I'll do whatever it takes to win.

And I put on that big old worm. Had it in my mouth. That thing was crawling around in between my teeth, man. I was so glad to get that worm on my mind. I promise you, but that's about what's 23 years old. That was a long time ago. It's the best. So all right.

So you won. It's crazy whirlwind. My real question is how awkward it has it been going around with, with Jalen and Chase and Justin, the other finalists and them being like, well, it's yours, dude. So I actually haven't seen them after, after the Heisman Trophy ceremony itself. They ushered me out of there. And I think, you know, all three of those guys left this morning and I had to stay. Right.

So I haven't seen them today, but you know, I played with Chase for a year. So it was awesome to see him. Yeah. But they, I mean, I would imagine going to all these events and, and seeing everything and they're just along for the ride. You're like, actually I'm winning the Heisman. Yeah. I mean, Jalen's dad came up to me and he was like, you know, I told Jalen, we're

going to, we're happy to be here and just stand up and clap for you to go up there and get the Heisman. Yes. Yes. At what point during this year were you like, this is going to happen. Like this is an actual possibility that I'm going to be winning the Heisman Trophy. I mean, after the Texas game, I kind of felt like we could do it every single game. And, you know, we threw the ball.

So, I mean, we were technically in a four minute drill and we threw the ball three straight times and scored a touchdown. And I think that was kind of our, you know, hey country, we're, we're here. We're not LSU anymore. We're the new, new age LSU. Right. Right. So you made Coach O'Cry last night.

You cried too. Yeah. I don't, I didn't think that would be possible to make Coach O'Cry, but he cried on national television. Your speech was unbelievable. Were you shocked in your own self, like getting up there and being like, damn, I didn't think that this moment would be this overwhelming? Yeah.

Because I knew I was, I knew I was going to win it. Right. I walk, I, you know, go hug all my family, hug all the coaches, and I get up there. I'm like, gosh, yeah, like this is happening. And then, you know, you see all the guys behind you that you, that you grew up watching and idolizing and you're like, wow, I'm like really up here. So it's just kind of overwhelming. Yeah.

And the laser lock that Coach O had on you, beaming would be an understatement to say that he was beaming. His eyes, he wasn't crying. His eyes were sweating and it probably tasted like a delicious Cajun crawfish at Too Fae. Oh yeah. It was probably acidic. Could have probably melted the, melted his suit if I got on him.

I'm kind of mad that you didn't wear the Letterman jacket here. Do you realize when you wear the Letterman jacket and you have that little curl that comes down in front of your forehead that you are like every 80s, like bully from every movie in the 80s? Yeah. You know, people were tweeting at me all weekend because I don't, I don't have a coat in Louisiana and I keep them all in Ohio and I just had my Letterman jacket. I'm like, I guess I'll bring this thing to New York and then everyone started tweeting me.

Like, you look like you could be the quarterback of a high school team that just put, put someone's head in the urinal or something. Right, right, right. You do. You look like the guy who's giving everyone swirlies and then you go out there and throw for like 600 yards and beat a team 70 to nothing, you know, whatever. I'm going to take home the, you know, the prom queen. So I like that look.

I like that look, the Joe Burrow, bad ass 80s, like, you know, bad boy style. Yeah. I wanted to, I wanted to get, I want to get my neck big enough so I can wear one of those NBA sweat bands around my neck, like Jim McMahon. Yes. Hell yeah. Yes. What's the more meaningful trophy for you?

This one or the Ohio Mr. Football trophy that you got that your dad made? That we made, that we made by ourselves because Mr. Football doesn't give out a trophy. The fact that Mr. Football doesn't get out of trophies is unreal. It's messed up, right? It is, it is. Because I was like, I was hitting, I was like, talking to the guy that was interviewing me. I was like, Hey, when, when do I get the trophy? He's like, Oh, you don't get a trophy.

I was like, what do you mean? And then he said, yeah, you just get the title. I was like, I don't want that. That's a millennial move on your part. It is a participation trophy just for winning the best football player in the state of Ohio. Well, it's a prestigious trophy because the winner before you, the year before you, right? Wasn't it Mr. Whiskey?

It was two years before it. I think I finished third in the voting my sophomore year and he was first. Yeah. You finished third in sophomore year? Yeah. Shit. That's awesome. Something like that.

That's insane. Now when you, your dad worked for Ohio and was he defensive coordinator? Yep. Defensive coordinator. So when you were growing up watching football, were you like, I just expect there to be shitty football played on Tuesdays and Wednesday nights? I mean, I was like people and so the action started like when I was like my eighth grade and freshman year.

So we were, I was fired up because I didn't have to do any homework on those nights. I could just go to football game and go home and mama was like, do you have any homework? I'd be like, yeah. And she's like, go to bed. Yeah. That's amazing. So matching meant a little something different to you.

Something special in my heart. Yeah. The rest of like the adult world basically sweating out these random games on a Tuesday night in November. Yeah. Lowered my GPA a couple of points. That's hilarious. So you go from Ohio to Louisiana.

What state has the better cuisine? So. Because Ohio's got skyline chili. Oh God. You don't like it. He's a fan. He's a fan. There you go.

No fan. He hates it. I hate it. You're going to switch back? No. I like skyline. I like skyline. Since that he's going to hate me.

I hate that stuff. It's not real chili. Yeah. It's just sauce. Right. What do you mean since you're going to hate you? I mean they've hated me for a while because I've had these takes since like I first got to Ohio State and they're like what do you mean you're from Ohio?

It doesn't matter. Yeah. OK. Good. Good. At least you have a brain then because skyline chili is disgusting. But so the thing about Louisiana food is really good for about three months but they only know how to make one thing and it's they dip whatever they can find in a bucket of

oil and fry it. Delicious. Delicious. So you can only eat it for a couple months before it gets really old. Right. Yeah. There is a point where you're like hey maybe let's mix in a salad. Yeah.

Maybe a salad. Maybe some pasta or like a steak but they just dip it all in there. So the story about Coach O recruiting you and the 15 pounds of crawfish that was 100% true. 100% true. So walk us through it. Tell it for people who might not know this story. Yeah.

So I was you know we have this place in Columbus that we used to go to and need some crawfish and Coach O was talking to me. He's like you ever had crawfish before? I was like yeah I had a couple of times and he's like do you like it? I was like yeah I love it. So we go to this place called Mike Anderson's and... We went there. Yeah.

Yeah it's right next to my house and I'm looking for the crawfish on the menu and there's no crawfish. I was like yeah I was you know looking forward to having some crawfish in crawfish country. Right. And Coach O was like you want some crawfish? I was like oh you know it's all right you know I was hoping to get some. He's like I got it and he called he he makes a call like 20 minutes later they bring in this bathtub of crawfish bring it in the back they boil it and bring it right back out.

Yeah he's got a crawfish guy that's a least surprised. I'll bet you Coach O's crawfish guy doesn't even have a stove it's just a pager. Yeah. And he only gets one call and from Coach O one contact. Yeah he's like oh shit Coach O wants it. He doesn't even have to say anything he just hits a button. Yeah he just pages him 911. He's like all right well we gotta get the crawfish here we go.

Have you uh have you ever gone jogging at high noon with Coach O? I have not but I've been driving um out of workouts when I've seen Coach O and he just gives a little fist bump when he sees me driving out of there. It's becoming friends with the sun. Yeah gotta know it gotta love it. Ray Baker that's what he calls it Ray Baker. What's that? The sun.

Oh that's the same for the sun. Yeah the Ray Baker. Ray Baker that's awesome that's so good. We should we should make sunglasses or just called Ray Baker. Ray Baker I like that. Um what did he tell you guys before the Alabama game because you guys hadn't beaten Alabama in forever. Yeah. We went to the game last year didn't score.

Not that fun not that fun at all. We cheered a lot before the game. Yeah it was really you know everyone was fired up before the game but you know going into that game I was like I had a feeling that we were gonna get our asses kicked. Right so how about this year though when you guys you know haven't I think it was you guys hadn't scored a touchdown against Alabama in like seven or eight quarters hadn't beaten them in a while what did he tell you guys in the locker room beforehand. Yeah he I mean he said he said it stops here you know he was he drew a line

fake line with his with his foot and his finger and he said you know this just stops here and we felt like we were the better team like we kind of knew we were going to go in and take our business. Yeah that confidence is that's what I was explaining it on Sunday last week's podcast after watching you in the Georgia game the SEC championship there's something about your look and your demeanor on the field that makes me want to run through a brick wall. Yeah it's like you have this confidence in your face. You did the walk-off touchdown against Georgia that was a cocky move.

Yeah. Where you you just knew you're like oh yeah I mean he was wide open I knew I got it to him and I just started running off. So for people who didn't watch the game Joe threw a touchdown pass and while the ball was basically in the air he was what he he turned and walked towards the side and was like that's a touchdown I'm good. It was pretty awesome. Yeah I'll do something before every game so the two teams have you know they do their team

warm-ups and each team is on like the 35 or something and you know when we get done I'll go and just stand at like the 48 so I don't cross their line and just stare at them and they have all their people that line up and try to like hide it and I'm just like looking right through them and they're just standing there trying to like stare in me in the eyes and I'm just beating my eyes through all of them. And they're like why where did this bully from 1986 come from? Yeah I got a guy on the sideline with my letterman jacket come out and put it on me. I love it.

I love it. So a lot of people are saying that you got your swagger when you got hit in that full game the game against UCF and the dude kind of laid you out and you popped up afterwards because it looked like it was a pretty bad hit. I actually thought that you were kind of a changed player after the Alabama game last year. Yeah. Like something clicked in you at that point like for you where was it where was the moment where you're like you know what I'm taking this next step forward and I feel good about

where I'm at right now like everything in the past isn't the past. Would you say it was after that loss against Alabama? Yeah so we played Rice the next game. So we played Arkansas after Alabama and stunk it up. We were terrible. We beat him by like seven or something. I remember that game because you guys. Nick Rosette stopped at the two yard line and everyone was pissed because we didn't hit the over.

You guys kept on running plays with like no time left. Because that was Coach E. He was like screw this. I want to score a touchdown and Nick kept falling down. They kept on. It was weird too. They would fall down on first down then they ran a real play on second down then they fall down. Like you guys were doing both things. I remember vividly watching it.

I had Arkansas. Yeah. So I was happy that he felt but that was crazy. Yeah Coach E was not very happy in the locker room. Nick what are you doing? I wanted to score a touchdown there. It was crazy. It was crazy but keep going.

Yeah and so then we played Rice after Arkansas and that was my first 300 yard game and then we played Texas A&M the dreaded seven overtime game. That was not that fun. No. Missable actually. That was a weird ref. Was it weird after you lost and Coach O was soaking wet from the game. So I had passed so yeah I didn't even know that had happened.

I would have stopped that immediately. Yes. You know so I actually passed out in the locker room because I didn't so I didn't really know what was going on. I was dehydrated. That's great. Yeah. You totally lost consciousness.

Yeah I was super dizzy and lightheaded and I had to like chug a couple applesauce like the go-go squeezes to get my blood sugar up. That's not. So then I had a pretty good game there and then you know it was really the bowl practice because I got there in the summer. I didn't have a spring practice with them and the bowl practice was kind of a spring ball for me. Right.

And so I got I got with my guys and kind of treated it like an off season and then I think that really helped us in the bowl game. So the story about the day you signed and Billy Cannon who was the only other LSU Tiger to win the Heisman Trophy do you think so for people who don't know Billy Cannon won the Heisman Trophy 60 years ago. He passed away May 20th 2018 on that day. Joe Burrow signed officially to be the quarterback at LSU. Yeah.

That's some like that's some higher powers. Yeah. I mean this that's so weird. All right. So I know people have asked you about it but I'm going to flip it on you. Will you now when hopefully you know 75 80 years from now when you pass away will you make sure that you pass away during like on Sunday. Yeah.

Right. Like you got to make sure I'm on live support. I will make sure my family pulls the plug on signing day. Okay. Good. I was just saying don't be selfish and like pass away in the middle of August or something. Yeah. Fuck this.

I'll hold it out. I'll hold it out till December. Yeah. You like Eli Manning the fourth commits to play at LSU on a date. Arch Manning Jr. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly.

Okay. Good. That's all I was when I saw that I was like I'm I know people have been asking this but I really want to know can he make sure to die on the correct time period. Yeah. I got you. The intangibles matter. Yeah.

I've been a fan of yours ever since I realized what a huge fan of Matthew Delovadova's. Oh yeah. I got the deli shirt on. You are rocking the deli shirt and people thought I was just making that up about you but you are probably a bigger deli fan than I am. Yeah. At what point did you realize like this is actually he's actually better than LeBron James.

So I've been a deli fan from the jump back in 2014 when they got him and then when Kyrie went down in the 2015 finals everyone was going crazy. I'm like relax. All right. Deli's got this. We got Deli is going to come in and wreak havoc. Okay. We're good.

He shut Steph Curry down in that first game. And everyone fluids. Everyone thinks it's a joke but he's he's good. Like he's good. He's good. He's good. He's good. He's good and he works really hard and he hits you in the nuts when you come in.

So there's so there's this so our quarterback coach at Ohio State had us do like they're all about like elite people and they had us do like a presentation of elite people. I didn't mind on deli and there is a there is a quote from David Blatt that said like deli's first camp he they were having like this little just pick up game and he picked up Kyrie full court the entire time and Kyrie's like what the hell is going on and deli picked him up full court at like the rec center or something. Of course he does. Yeah.

That's what he does. Yeah. So did you have a moment last night when you won the Heisman where you're like even if everything fails in life I can open up a bar in LSU and just put the Heisman in there and just like just reap the benefits of it and and just sell like crappy food for the rest of my life. Well the Heisman trophy is one of those trophies where if you win it that's you forever. Like you have that no matter what any else anything else happens in your life. Your Heisman trophy.

Yeah. Do you have you had that moment yet where you're like I guess this I guess there we go. This is the moment right here. Yeah. Okay. You're good. You can either open a restaurant called Burroughs. E-A-U-X and put the Heisman trophy in there.

Sell like hamburgers or something. Yeah. Car dealership. Yeah. Because you're a lot of money. Yeah. You're always Heisman trophy winner Joe Burroughs. Yeah.

And so you have that forever. Yeah. That's crazy. Okay. That's yeah. I mean that is crazy to think like something you know what are you 23. 23. To have that.

That's it for life. Crazy. Obviously you're going to accomplish a lot more. But I would personally just stop trying after that. Yeah. I mean I'm good. I'm good. NFL no thanks.

I'm just going to be the Heisman trophy winner. Yeah. I mean I could probably do it if I wanted to. Yes. The E-A-U-X on the back of your jersey when you wore that out for senior night. I don't know. Did you watch the the camera? I did.

Shot of it. Yeah. Yeah. Are one of you. These guys. Did you guys do it? Yeah. I mean.

Oh he's another incredible job. It was like a tracking shot from Goodfellas. Yeah. You should have done you should have just had like $100 bills that you just hand it to everybody on your way out there. But it was amazing watching it at you know the camera follows you out at Death Valley. Pans around you just like a 360 and almost felt like we were there out on the field like getting to experience that.

But for you you decided to put the E-A-U-X on your back right. Yeah. That was your idea. Yeah. Why'd you want to do that? You know I thought it was going to be a great moment for for LSU in Louisiana because you know they had been doing it since I had first got there and I started out crappy like 45% or something and they kept doing it.

And you know I thought I was just a way for me to pay tribute to the state. Yeah. It is cool seeing and everything you've said about you know your love for Louisiana and the relationship you've had now with Baton Rouge and LSU. You don't see that very often in college sports especially because guys don't stay around for as long you know in basketball. You've only been there two years and you're you feel like a native son now. It's crazy.

It's it's wild. Just driving down the roads and they say let's go Joe or let's go burrow or burrows or something on like the little signs on the side of the road. So it's been it's been crazy. Yeah. Do you have I'm sure you still have friends on the Ohio State team. Yeah. Do you is it was it like any hard feelings when you left Ohio State just there.

There really wasn't and you know they understood why I left. I had broke my hand the camp before I left and then and then me and DeWayne Haskins had were battling it out for two years and ended up battling out in that spring and he ended up beating me out and they understood why I left and there was there were no hard feelings at all. Yeah. Do you you're a big SpongeBob guy. Big SpongeBob guy. What what's your we are huge SpongeBob guys.

My my my Twitter. What do you call that the header. Yeah it's it's dirty dirty Dan the dirty Dan episode. What what. Oh we know that episode because we're such huge fans. We've watched all of the episodes so many times we forget sometimes to remind us what happened in the dirty day episode. Oh they were SpongeBob and Patrick were arguing about who is going to be dirty Dan.

Oh and then and then obviously hibernating Sandy comes out. Obviously hey I'm dirty Dan like picks him up and rips Patrick's head off. Now we actually have watched SpongeBob once. I did enjoy it but we're a little too old for it but I loved the one time we did watch it. And your cartoon fan like in general right. Yeah like every so is SpongeBob number one for you. Yeah for sure. See I wish I was I wish I I wish I was younger.

I wish I could go back in time because I feel like I've just missed SpongeBob. I missed the whole thing. So you were a Tom and Jerry guy. No we're like Simpsons. Tom and Jerry was a 1916. Yeah well how old do you think we are dude. I'm a Tom and Jerry guy. I'm younger than you guys.

I'm a Tom and Jerry guy. They go you like the Muppets. Yeah Wiley Coyote. Simpsons guys. I'm a Simpsons guy. Up and down. Simpsons family guy. Yeah I got a pair of Simpsons Bart Simpson cotton shorts.

Okay yeah. Oh my shorts. Yeah. Has it like said in yet that you're going to be like one of the either first or second pick in the NFL draft. Nope. Because that happened fast. Yeah that happened real fast.

Real fast. I was a undrafted guy last year. It's incredible. Yeah. So I'm going to keep you humble. I actually read a scouting report from Jeremy Fowler. He talked to scouts from ESPN. He said one scout said he's not a particularly thick stout guy and he doesn't have a huge arm.

Yeah there it is. That's I just gave Joe a little more. Yeah I just listen. Oklahoma he's going to take that out on you. What I just told him. Because you're like okay yeah all right little chip on the shoulder. But yeah people are still doubting you. Yeah I mean they always do.

It's all good. Yeah. Do you think that you're not thick enough. I mean I think I'm all right. Rate your thickness. How many C's. Oh how many C's. Yeah three C's.

Three C's. Yeah no I saw thick enough. I saw. Josh Allen's a 12 C's. Yeah I saw your pants get pulled down in that one game. I would say I would say two C's. That's true. You need to eat more of that fried food.

Yeah that's soft. That was your Heisman moment. Yeah I think I could have broken that tackle if I wanted to get completely pantsed and run naked around the field. But I actually thought that at the time I was like you're being modest. You cared more about like making sure that everything didn't take it off. Yeah my manhood didn't grace its grace itself on national television. That was an all time moment though.

If you had broken out of the tackle and then run for a first down. Or like throwing a touchdown with my. Yes that actually was where the state of Louisiana first showed that they had your back because there was a ton of complaints to the FCC. Not that Joe Burroughs ass was shown on TV that. They replayed it. Yeah that they replayed it and made you look like a fool. That was the complaint.

They were like that's fucked up. That's our quarterback. How would you do that. I think that was the most. A verified Twitter crowd right there. They need to apologize to that guy. Yes yes the people of Louisiana you can't embarrass LSU. Agreed yeah.

Have you heard that you're older than Lamar Jackson. Yeah he was in my recruiting class. Yeah all right. Oh speaking of recruiting when you were when you were deciding to transfer out of Ohio state where else were you looking at besides LSU. It was really Cincinnati in North Carolina. Yeah okay. Back brown.

Did he get injured. No he was not there yet. So you're trying to follow in the steps of Mitch Rabisky. Yeah he missed Ohio and North Carolina. There you go. That was honestly one of the reasons why. Yeah because he was he was from Ohio and was Mr. Football my sophomore year and he played one year at North Carolina and left

and was number two overall draft pick. I'm like hey what if I want to go do that. Yeah yeah. Let's let's go do that. But you know I talked to then I talked to coach Joe and that was the rest of history. Do you ever think like after you met coach Joe was it was it kind of up in the air. Did you always know like this feels like the right place for me. So I think so at Cincinnati they had people that I was close with from Ohio State because

because Luke Fickle was the DC at Ohio State my first two years and I was really just went on a visit to LSU to be like you know I kind of want to win a national championship let's go see what this place is about. And then I talked to coach Joe and didn't talk to him for a week and he was wanted to keep recruiting me but I don't I'm not I don't like talking on the phone I don't like the recruiting stuff and so he coach I would call Dan my brother every single night and try to get try to recruit through Dan. That's perfect.

He so we were in we were at LSU when your recruiting was going on we were there I think the oh yeah you were there it was great week. Yes yes and we were like they told us like hey we think we might have this guy we're trying really hard like come on let's do it and then we saw the hold that tiger tweet. I think it was like two days after whatever it was officially. Yeah it was like fuck yes they got the official quote that coach O gave us about you was he's a ball player and he had the energy that might be the best compliment coach O could pay somebody. Yes yeah he got we were just kind of like bolstering with him after the interview talking

about recruiting whatever and then I think Derek mentioned there's this kid from Ohio State that coach O was trying to get a quarterback and he just locked in on us he goes oh he's a ball player yeah he got really excited I was like he has so much faith in this guy I guess it goes two ways because you know you are you obviously share a connection with him yeah where you'll run through brick wall for him but I think he actually has that same connection with you where you've become like such a big part of his life right now that he feels like you almost lead him at times too. Yeah I think coach O likes me so much because he always he always tells me I would have been

an all-american linebacker too and so I think I think he loves that part of me. He likes the fact that you could also lay the wood on somebody if you had to. Yeah you mentioned Derek so our friend Derek Promansky who works for LSU he's like coach coach O's right hand guy so he told me a story and it's so perfect that it's worked out this way so when you were getting recruited by LSU it was basically you know in May when they probably have a little downtime and he was supposed to go on vacation. Yeah this Mother's Day weekend I came actually. Yeah he was supposed to go on vacation with his wife and he was supposed to have time off

for the first time in like six months and you were you decided to go to LSU to do the recruiting visit last second so he had to cancel the plans and vacation with his wife and his wife said to him he better fucking win a Heisman and then we flash forward in two years. There it is. Yep boom there's the Heisman. On the table. I fucking love stories like that so you you clearly like did you tell Derek like you're welcome dude.

Yeah he told I didn't hear the story until last night I'm like well Derek I'm glad I got you out of the doghouse you're welcome. It took a while but the Heisman literally got him out of the doghouse. Is that weird to you at all that you've accomplished a lot like your SEC champion you've got a Heisman trophy sitting right in front of you right now and you're about to go on the toughest two game stretch potentially of your entire season. Yeah I mean that's what we've you know the Heisman is nice but we've this is what we wanted we wanted the the national championship this is what I've been working for for 15 years.

Yeah it's weird because it kind of like it kind of is almost a mid-season award when you get down to the games that really really really matter at the end. Yeah I'm I'm ready to get back to practice and stop doing all these interviews with with all these people and just get back to get back on the practice field. You don't have to look at us in the eye you have an exclusive story for us yet. Yeah I do okay so at our old facility you guys were there and that there's that big long hallway you can just see all the way down all the meeting rooms are right there and every once in a while Kocho would walk down and just start saying hold that tiger

and just sing that over and over again all the way down and all the way back at least once a day at least. And everyone's just like here he comes. I mean we would we would all stop stop our film and just look around like what is it what is he doing like what what made him want to sing that. He's just like he's a tiger that's just pacing that's how we growl is to let everybody know one heartbeat I'm here yeah it's everyone on the same page. Everyone's listening to Kocho hold that tiger for one moment in the day. Do you like what day of the week do you like the most tell the truth Monday

competition Tuesday turn over Wednesday or no repeat Thursday. I like no repeat Thursday. Why? Because you just don't. What's no repeat Thursday. Um so it's it's like the the walkthrough before the game get all the get all the looks right we have a little red zone walkthrough that that's my favorite period of the other week. I think we're the number one red zone team in the country and that's now that period it's not a brag that's a fact.

Yeah and I just I love that period that that that's my period of the week. Okay it's it's crazy how good your offense is right now I was looking at some of your stats and people were trying to find what's his weak point and I think you have your number one in completion percentage of passes shorter than five yards from five to ten yards and ten yards plus yeah it seems like you've got everything going right now. I have to assume that you've heard from some old LSU wide receivers that have hit you up and been like hey man where were you why weren't you born like 10 years earlier.

Yeah um they usually say it to me when they're in person they don't usually text it to me but the the the old guys that come to the silent they're like hey man I wish I wish we were in this offense I would have had 3 000 yards receiving. That's a great thing because Odell Beckham can literally say whatever number that he wants. He'd be like if I played for if I played one season with Joe Burrow in this offense I'd put up 10 1100 or yeah 10 100 yards receiving easy no problem. Yeah I'm taking out three kicking nets. Yeah yeah you can fact check them on that.

All right my last question Seeky question promo code take you get ten dollars off promo code take go see LSU play Oklahoma in Atlanta promo code take. Okay so the college playoffs are coming up then you obviously have the combine and the draft I wish we had our bench press set up because we'd have you just do that part right now. Do you want us to create a draft Joe Burrow website like we did for Josh Allen and if we do how much of your signing bonus do we get. Good question. I think it would I think I think it has to retire with the draft Josh Allen because

there's been two of them. Okay so you'll just give us part of your signing bonus just for being guys. Yeah you got it. Okay perfect as as your marketing assistants. I like that. General Joe Burrow fans we will get a portion of the proceeds. Like point oh one percent. Joe has not looked at how much money.

Are you going to bench at the at the combine. I don't think quarterbacks do that. Brady Quinn. I think he did like 24 or something. He told us the story and it just basically was he was just a meathead. Somebody was like you won't bet. She was like yeah I will. All right cool it's good to have you here.

Congratulations on everything. What are you going to run in 40. I'm hoping to hit four six. Okay. Yeah well that would be that would be blazing for me. That would be fast. Okay and we're going to be you know we won't get ahead of ourselves. We might make a website anyways.

We don't yeah we don't want to do bulletin board material but we will be at the national championship. It's going to take place no matter what happens in the semi-finals. That's going to be crazy in New Orleans. It will especially I mean a lot of Oklahoma fans in New Orleans. We want to give them bulletin board material too. Don't give them bulletin board material. Remember your arm is not thick enough.

You're right. Yeah you're right. And you're not thick enough. Not thick enough. Three C's not five. But if you LSU happens to win we will be there and we'll probably be I don't know. Do you think we'll be in your family's suite. Do you think where do you think we'll be.

Who do you think I am. We don't have a suite. And student athlete. Okay. Oh that's right. Yeah that was a good save the other week when you were talking about how you didn't see anybody on campus. Because I don't go to class.

Oh yeah because I don't go to class because they're all online. Yeah so I started talking about that and I said you know obviously I don't go to class because it was all local media and they all knew I had online class and I was like you know this might blow up if it gets picked up so I'm just going to say because I have online classes. Yes yes. You didn't go to LSU to play school. Yeah do you have do you have your new phone now.

I do yeah. Okay good. Yeah. I didn't I couldn't receive phone calls for about a week and a half. And that's actually awesome. Yeah it was awesome. You should just say that you still. And my mom was like do you want us to get you a new one.

I was like you know I don't I like not talking on the phone to people so I'm I'm good for a couple weeks. Yes yes. All right well Joe thank you. This is your last interview. Is this your last interview this weekend. This is the last one yeah. Thank God.

All right. Congratulations you made it. You survived it. You did it. And congrats on the husband. This has been awesome and go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers.

Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers.

Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers.

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