Pardon My Take - Jersey Shore’s Vinny and DJ Pauly D, NBA/NHL Playoffs And The Masters

Episode Date: April 12, 2019

The Masters are back and we're hyped for some golf naps.(2:25-7:54) NHL Playoffs and the Caps year again. (7:55-11:31) NBA Playoff predictions - The Warriors are going to win again, probably. (11:32-20:00) We need to do a better job getting Rick Pitino hired.(20:01-22:25) New Friday Topic - your weekly personal Fyre Fest. (22:26-26:25) Jersey Shore's Vinny and Pauly D join the show to talk about their new MTV show Double Shot at Love, their Celebrity, and soaking.(28:33-47:19) Segments include whoa(49:33-50:40), embrace debate do we feel bad for Chris Davis,(50:41-52:45) Seeing Red,(52:46-55:44) Trey Wingo's Anchorman quote of the day(57:51-1:01:35) and FAQ's (1:01:36-1:07:36).You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, ad-free, on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we've got the boys from Jersey Shore, Vinny, and DJ PauliD. They got a new show, two shot, second shot, double shot, double shot of love, I paid attention. No, that was actually very funny, we actually taught them something, the guys that know it all, who have been, I think in Vinny's words said that they've been just like hooking up with girls left and right for the last decade, we taught them what soaking is.

So double shot of love, we also talked to them about the fact that their friend, the situation is in jail with Billy McFarlane, it's going to be the greatest duo this world has ever seen, NBA playoffs, Stanley Cup playoffs. We have a new segment, or it's probably a topic, right, Firefest of the Week, and FAQs. I don't even know the difference between a segment and a topic at this point. Yeah, it's all go blends together, it's all one song. Before we get to all of that, it's the Cash App, and it's the cash card from the Cash App, the number one finance app in the App Store.

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Today is Friday, April 12th. Hello, friends. I'm getting there. When you masturbate, think about my tongue or your clit and switching back and forth from my dick to my tongue. I don't know, Jim. I don't know about that, Jim. It's the masters, baby.

That's how I feel watching the masters, because I know that people, true golf fans are going to say that Johnny come lately with golf. That's fine. I fucking love the masters. I don't care. I really don't care. I love the masters. I love the song.

I love the Tigers in there. Tiger is competing. He's minus two, three. Minus two. See how much we watch the masters. Brooks Kipka has made a little run on the back nine. I think he's in the lead right now as of the time we're recording this. I think he's minus six.

He's minus six is a fair score. It's greener than true worse. That's the problem. Did the wind die down? You always got to worry about the guys who tee off early and then late. Extremely fortunate tee time. Hank, I will give you one mulligan. That's golf speak for those who don't know.

I will give you one mulligan. Why don't they have mulligans in the PJ Tour? It'd be badass. It would be so awesome. Think about it. John Daly would be the best golfer in the world if you had mulligans. But if you got to the 18th hole and it's like, but he still got his mulligan, that would be sick.

I will give you one mulligan to retract your statement from Wednesday that you don't love the masters, the music, the pageantry, the course, the amen corner, the little bridge that goes over that little thing. The azalea bushes. The azaleas. Full bloom. The wood chips. Yeah, the pine straw that's perfectly manicured so there's not a single straw on the fairway.

Love it all. The green and the yellow. I like all those things. They're very nice. They're very cheap. Yes, very cheap. Yes. It's a very nice mulligan.

No cell phones. No cell phones. Love that. Something I take very seriously. I don't just throw the L word around. And for something that, you know, I might watch it on Saturday. I will watch it on Sunday, but I don't know that that's really enough for me to be like, I love this thing.

You will watch it on Sunday. I will definitely watch it on Sunday. You know what I love about? If there's like a good playoff game on Saturday versus the Masters, I'm going to watch the playoff game. You know what I love about the Masters on Sunday? It's not like a, it's not a party atmosphere. Everybody watches the Masters by themselves, maybe with their dad, maybe with like a roommate

or something like that. But it is not like, it is the one day a year where you can take part in the biggest sporting event of that sport of the year and just sit there and chill, fall asleep, take a nap. Wake up. It's the biggest Sieb's day of the year. Yeah. Wake up, fall asleep. You're going to keep pushing that?

Yeah. Okay. No, I'm the biggest Sieb's day of the year. Yeah. Sieb's. I'm in. I'm in. I'm not pushing it.

I'm the only person not doing Sieb's. Not Sieb's. Yeah. Is it a verb or no? So it stands for CBF originally, which, well, it starts as acronym. It's not even close to Sieb's. It starts as, can't be fucked. Then it was shortened to CBF.

Then it was short to CB. Now it's Sieb's. Got it. That's the etymology of the phrase Sieb's. And then the next phase is just not saying it. It's just, yeah. Hey, what are you doing this weekend? It dies with a whisper, not a bang.

No, I'm excited for the Masters. If you're not excited for the Masters, I don't trust you as a sports fan. Honestly, like I know there's always, it's whenever there is an event that is not one of the main force sports, everyone, there'll be the hardcore people who'll be like, how could you, you know, you're just showing up for this. You won't care about the shell open next week. You know what? I probably won't.

True. I will watch a golf match in the middle of July or August if it's compelling on a Sunday afternoon. But for the most part, I'm a four majors guy, maybe a sprinkler and a couple here players champion. Ryder Cup too. But the Masters is great. The Masters is also, I feel like the official gateway to the official spring.

You know what I mean? You get that taste of spring, March Madness, St. Patrick's Day. But once Masters starts, you're like, let's go. It is about to be spring into summer. I agree. And you've got so many good storylines. You've got Tiger making a run. You've got Brooks Tom and then you've got Phil Lefty just being Lefty.

You've got Bubba Watson looking like a shell of himself. You've got Dustin Johnson wearing those pants that you can always see his dick in. That's a big thing. Phil had a hundred dollars bill like just sticking out of his pocket when he was at the practice round. He's a come and take it fuckers. Yeah. He's just ready to gamble.

Yeah, you've got Sergio Garcia trying to battle those demons to see if he can win his first major. Sergio Garcia. Sergio Garcia. Sergio. I love Sergio. We were talking about this earlier, but we were trying to watch, we were live streaming the Masters.

Our whole office was and we don't really have great internet to begin with, but when everybody is trying to stream it at the same time, it just buffers. And seeing golf as people are buffering on the screen, it's very difficult to tell whether or not you're back watching it live because they just stand over their putts full off. Yeah. I watched 15 seconds of the screen crashing, but being like, oh, he's really taking his time here on this putt. Yeah.

And when it's Sergio, it's impossible to tell because he can stay over the ball. Sergio is born with like a birthmark of the buffering wheel that you get on like an apple. It's always broken. Always broken. Sergio is constantly buffering. All right. So we have Masters. We have NBA playoffs starting on Saturday.

We have the NHL playoffs started last night. Exciting games. That's another one where it's like, if you don't get your blood going for any playoffs, but especially Stanley Cup playoffs where it's like, I don't care if you, I mean, the Blackhawks started, I watched all the games last night because it's always exciting. And you got your caps coming up. Yeah. So we don't know if they won or not.

We don't know. They're playing later on tonight. I'm assuming they're going to win. It's Caps Canes. Sounds like a Burlington Coat Factory, not a playoff series. I'm very confident. I'm thinking like Caps in five. Whoa.

Caps in five. That's what I'm going. Well, it's getting dangerous because of how confident I feel. Last year, I was always saying not worried. I'm not worried. You were down to nothing. And you were very worried. And I was very worried secretly.

This year, not worried at all, but I actually mean it this time. I'm actually not worried. And that scares me. Because you don't care if they win or not. It scares me. No, very much. Because you already won one. No, Eric won last year.

I got it. That was my brother. That was for him. This one's for me. Got it. One of the funnier storylines I think in sports period is the fact that the Islanders are playing their first round at the Long Island Coliseum, which is like literally a barn. Whatever.

Well, don't disrespect the old barn. Yeah, sorry. Well, Coliseum. The Collie. It's like 15,000 people. It's absolutely crazy. No luxury suites. The game last night was insane.

No luxury suites. One of the last like old school stadiums I feel like. Barn. Barn. Just absolute mayhem. If they beat the Penguins, their second and every round going forward is going to be at the Barclays Center. They're playing a little home and home with themselves as they advance.

The Barclays Center is not a great place to watch hockey. No. Can I just say though? And like doesn't embody Long Island whatsoever. No. It's broken. It's going to be a totally different audience for that. I love hockey teams that wear the color combo of blue and orange.

That pops. If it's the Oilers or if it's the Islanders. That looks good on the ice in April. Yes. It absolutely does. So we have the Stanley Cup playoffs. We'll probably get our guys, our guys, Ryan Whitney or Biz Nastyon in the next week or so.

NBA playoffs. Real quick. Yeah. I want to jump back to the Caps Cane series just for one second. Oh yeah. The Canes. They're hashtag. It's hashtag take warning.

Go Canes. No. It's take warning. That's pretty bad ass, right? It is pretty bad ass. I kind of want to hijack it. But I feel like it's more for our use than it is for theirs. Take warning.

Why? What is the background of that? I have no idea. Hurricane. Yeah. Take warning? Like take a warning of the Hurricanes coming. For the Hurricanes.

Got it. So honestly they just, they squatted on a hashtag hoping that we would come take it from them. So guess what? It worked. We're taking it from them. Yeah. Take warning.

The other thing is I've got a little bet going on with Will Branson on this. Okay. If the Caps win, then he has to shave Prisko's back. Ugh. Yeah. And if the Caps win, I have to shave his back. Ugh. Yeah.

Okay. That's the last we need to hear about that. Very high stakes. Ugh. That's gross. Does Prisko know? No. Okay.

Ugh. Will doesn't technically know, but he did fave the tweet. Wait. So actually the bet is you have to wrestle a hairy bear to the ground and then shave his back. I'm pretty sure Prisko would be pretty docile because he doesn't get a lot of people that say, hey Pete, can I shave your back? I don't know.

It feels like a guy who will fight to the death and then you're like, no dude, I just actually just want to shave your back real quick. We'll do it as a trick. We'll just say shave his shoulders and we'll just hug him and when we hug him, just give him a little zzzz. Yeah. On his shoulder. Okay.

So Will Branson did not agree to this. He knows of the bet and he liked the tweet, so he acknowledged the bet. So yeah. Got it. Running with it. Okay. NBA playoffs. Hank, I want to start with you.

Marcus Smart out. I'm worried. You are. Officially. Panic button. Pressed. Kind of. Yeah.

Okay. I mean, it's like, you would say he's the heart and soul of the team. Okay. They are already kind of on a rocky road going into it. Like the East is much more stacked than they have been in the past and to lose such an important player, like the game or two games before the playoffs. It's tough to not, you know, I can't lie. The panic button is pressed.

If they make it past like the second round, I'll be surprised. You're getting a very important cheerleader in LeBron though, rooting on baby bro. No. No. LeBron, LeBron's too busy getting in front of all Dwayne Wade's moments as he retires from the NBA. You see that little smirk? Yeah.

So funny. And how about Mellow trying to jack up a shot? God damn it. I wish he took that shot. Also trading like the Jersey, we should just start trading Jersey. I was going to say this last night, I forgot to. We should just start like, you guys should just start trading shirts with guests when they come in.

That's not a bad idea. Just take your shirts off and do Jersey swap. Come down. Most of the guests are a lot richer than us, so we can get some really expensive gear. But how are you going to, he, Jersey swap with Carmelo. It was just getting in the stands. Yes. So we just got a dirty.

They did it after the game. Which one? USA? Photo. No, it was just Dwayne Wade. Like it was a Jersey swap with one Jersey. Whoa. So Dwayne didn't get anything back.

So Mellow didn't have Jersey. No. He should have taken the hoodie off. They also, the headline on ESPN was Banana Boat Crew goes to Dwayne Wade's last game. I love it. That's just it forever. The whole squad was there. That's the hardest crew in the world, the Banana Boat Crew.

Hank, did you see what Kairi said? He apologized for his behavior this year. I did not see that. He took ownership of it. He says there are things that we could handle differently. I'm speaking about myself mostly. Is the royal way. Yeah.

That's good. I still think he's going to go off. I think they're going to have a good playoff run. Oh, he'll go off. Without Marcus Smart, it's like, it's one of those things where every playoff team needs that guy that's like, gets people going and gets the team going. Yeah. Gets in an unreasonable fight.

Yeah. Yeah. You're right. Tom Wilson. Tom Wilson. He is the Tom Wilson. If Marcus Smart was a little bit better offensively. And maybe punch some people when they weren't looking.

Tom doesn't punch one. Now he's clumsy. All right. So the other NBA playoff series, anything we are excited for. I'm excited to see how Jay Butt meshes with the Sixers going to Brooklyn, which is going to be another hilarious crowd. That's going to be 50% Philly fans. If not more.

I've never been to a Nets game that people were at that paid for tickets. Like it's all just people that got given free tickets. Yes. I've only gone to Nets games for free. I also am excited for this is going to sound very random. But two games that are going to be played in Orlando. I don't know. It's just kind of cool.

It's like back to like the 90s. Give them a little treat. Yeah. They haven't been at the playoffs for forever. They haven't been at the playoffs for a while. Right. They just lost their native Sun Blake portals. They're hurting.

They need to heal. The Amway Center. Yeah. Whatever the fuck it's called. The Great Pyramid. Yeah. It's going to be great. They'll show Disney.

It will be like two o'clock on a Sunday. And then the Raptors will be up 25 to six after the first quarter. You know what's going to happen. Oh, there goes the part of my take sign. That's a bad sign. It's literally a bad sign. It's literally a bad sign. The only time we've ever talked about the magic and something fell off the wall.

Take warning. You know what's going to be fucking funny? How's the take warning? Yeah, it was. When they show a picture of Epcot Center, like a little bit of B-roll, I'm going to see it and I'm going to be like, that's a golf ball and I'm going to switch over to the Masters. Yeah.

It's going to remind America, hey, you should be watching a GUSTA. The Magic Games won't be until next week. But get excited. Oh, OK. Yeah. There's nothing. There's nothing. There's nothing.

There's nothing. There's nothing. DVR the Masters. So when the magic do play, you can flip over to the Masters. I probably will do that. That's good. Another take warning people can get there, takes, you know, they can get prepared for is the people that say the NHL playoffs are so much better because the first round is

way better than the NBA first round. Yes. The NBA first round. It catches up. The NBA needs to go back to five games. Five games and you have everyone excited because five games, not only does it not last two full weeks, but five games, you can have an upset that you don't see coming. Five games needs to be back like they'll never do it because they want money and they

want to, you know, have more games for more TV rights, all that shit, but I really miss the five games. All right. The only downside to NHL playoffs and how they get started so early into seven games is you have to. So they are awesome games, but they sometimes last until like 1 32 a.m. Oh, yeah. If it goes to a couple of over times.

That is tough. That's tough unless you're on the West Coast. That's a one time a year where being a West Coast sports fan is superior to being a East Coast sports fan. Yes. The drunk hockey after the second overtime is always the best when it's just guys just like falling all over themselves and hoping a puck goes in. I actually think that watching playoff hockey is more of a sport than playing playoff hockey.

I'd agree. I'd agree. It gets that heart rate going higher for sure. The fibrillator out West. I think the Warriors are going to win the NBA title. Okay. That is a fucking take. Watch out.

Take warning. Watch out. I fucking, man, I wish someone would beat him because it really, that's what really kind of dampens the. Well, you think someone. Houston. Look, Houston. Good.

Houston has to put it in. Good. Giannis is a freak. Oh, it's now. We're talking about finals. Okay. I'm hoping I would love to see a smart if they make it to the third round. Marcus Mar will come back.

The Clippers are going to annoy them in the first round. That's they're not going to win. They might not even win a game, but the Clippers are like the all hustle team. That's good. Be in the playoffs. If you take one game off Golden State in the first round, that qualifies as making some noise. Yes.

Officially made noise. Yes. I actually am very excited for the Rockets versus the Jazz and also the Blazers versus the Thunder. The West is going to be fun in the first round. Those are some good matchups and it will be so perfect. I shout out to all of our fans in Denver. I know you're excited about the Nuggets.

It's been an unbelievable season, but wouldn't it be so spurs to beat the Nuggets as a seven seed and just be like, yo, yeah, they're the fucking spurs. Yep. Yeah. Of course they do this. Of course they do this. Who do you guys have winning the NBA title? The magic?

I've got. I'm going to go with the Warriors. Okay. All right. I'm going to go with the Warriors as well. Although, although I guarantee you we get some serious fireworks if the Warriors losing like the second or third round and then Katie just immediately says, I'm not coming back. I'm out.

I'm out. And let's just pre, let's just set the table here. If the Warriors do lose, Steph's ankle injury was way worse than we thought. Yep. Absolutely worse. Like barely could walk. I just forgot about his ankle injury. That is good.

That's going to be a factor. Hey. I promise you, this is my promise to you. As soon as he has a bad shooting game, I will remind you of his ankle injury because that is my duty as a journalist. Can I pick the field? Oh, what would you like to bet? Did you see someone tweeted that if Tiger wins, you should get a tiger?

I did see that. What are your thoughts on that? I know. I thought it was a bad ass. Unoriginal, not really funny tweet. All right. I guess you're not into fun. All right.

So what would you like? You take the field and you win. Then you have to shave Prisco's back for me. Yeah. No, you have to hold Prisco down. Yeah. You have to wrestle Prisco while I run a dry razor on his back. And if I win, then you both have to shave Prisco's back together.

Prisco's back. Prisco's back. She's just going to become the ultimate jackpot for this podcast. Yeah. No. What should we make the stakes? For real. You want to shave your beard?

I'm not going to do whatever you do. It's really what you guys like. You don't like to make bets. You just like to like, oh, I'm going to make you do something. That's true. Ready to risk. Like, I'll risk it for the biscuit. Okay.

You have to go camping for three nights in a row in New York. Can I just set up a tent in my living room? No, you have to go camping. Okay. Let's just say this. We will figure out the stakes on Sunday night. When we tape Sunday night show, we will present the stakes for the PFT versus PFT and Big Cat versus Hank bet warriors in the field.

Okay. All right. Are you sure you don't want to get a cat? No. Okay. We've already been down that road. Yeah. I would love to go back down that road.

That ship is sealed. Maybe what about a slug farm? I mean, now we're talking back and forth. So I'm more open to. Yeah. You have to risk getting a cat. Fair it. Maybe it's worth it.

Hmm. We'll talk on Sunday. A gerbil. Two gerbils. Everything that you're saying, you're also putting up for yourself. No. Oh, cat versus cat. Right.

Call that scissor. That's a gerbil. We have to say sorry. No. Okay. We'll talk about it after. We almost had him on that one. That is the, so let's do our new segment.

Oh, before we do that, I think we need to, as a podcast, do a better job of trying to get Rick Petino a job. We have to do a better job of getting Rick Petino a job. Now a little birdie told Leroy earlier today that Rick Petino was spotted at a cafe in Cincinnati wearing a Cincinnati Bearcats polo shirt. Really? They sent me the picture as well. Is this the same birdie that confirmed he was going to Alabama?

No. Different birdie. Different birdie, Hank. Is that tweet still up? That tweet, I don't know. I forget what happened to that tweet. But I saw the picture. It certainly looked a lot like Rick Petino.

Can I see it? Yeah. Let me see this picture. Okay. It's a bald guy with a, it's actually huggy. You can only see him from like the mouth down, and he's not coming, so it's inconclusive. It's going to be very hard to tell. inconclusive.

But seriously, we need to get him a job. Is St. John's job been? And this is definitely how Rick Petino would sit, very cross-legged, no socks in his leather shoes. Looks like Rick to me. I mean, this is, this picture is just, no idea who this could be. Could be Rick. But we'll go with Rick.

Just admit the fact that it could be Rick Petino. It's funny too, because the person sent you being like, just saw Rick Petino, but I happened to not get a picture of his face. Well, just so you know, this was sent to Leroy, not to me. That's true. But we need to, we need to do a better job of getting Rick Petino a job. So I don't know how, what that looks like. I don't know what we can do.

We have to brainstorm something, but we need to put it on our shoulders to get Rick Petino a job. So let's just start throwing out rumors. He's going to be the next St. John's coach, maybe since he tried Alabama. That didn't work. Where else is there a head coach in vacancy? Wisconsin, Russiprocity. I'd fucking take him in a second.

Are you kidding me? It's like them in Minnesota. What if he took Minnesota from a son? That was Shakespearean. What's up saying? Like Wisconsin is basically taking Minnesota. Right. That's true.

It's basically the same job. I think that would make my life so much better if Rick Petino was the coach. I mean, we would win a national title. Yeah. Anywhere in the big 10 would be great for you. Yeah, it would be gone in like two seconds, but we would win it. Something tells me Rick isn't a Madison kind of guy. I don't know.

You could throw back some drinks. He would be in and out of that. You know, the capital is very phallic. That's true. He just takes one look at it. It's a big chode. Yeah. He lit up every night.

He loves the look of melted cheese curds. Yes, exactly. All right. Let's do it. So we have a new segment or topic, whatever the fuck we want to call it. We're going to do it every Friday until it runs its course and we want people to get involved. If you want to tweet it or email us, we're going firefest of the week.

So PFT, why don't you start? Your own personal firefest of the week, so everything that goes wrong now. In America is called this is the next firefest. Yes. All right. So my personal firefest of the week is I can't say claws up anymore. So it was a hot saying for the three day or the two days that we had it. Oh, it was hot.

Actually, I did a GIF. Did you? The Garfield GIF. Oh, yeah. That's right. I felt really good about it. Shitload of people were getting into it. I just said it off the top of my head and people were like, yeah, let's do it claws

up for the caps in the playoffs because I want to diet, cut down on the carbs. Third scratch, narrator voice, turns out they sold a sponsorship to a company that's a direct competitor of white claw. And by they, I mean, bleep out that name. Barstool Sports. Yes. Yeah. So, yeah, not allowed to say it anymore, which is a total bummer because it was going

places. Put your claws down, folks. Claws down. Put your claws back in the box. Back in the box. We'll bring them up later. I'm just going hashtag blank. Hashtag.

Hashtag claws up. Got a nice ring to it. Big firefest. Hashtag. Nothing. Blank. Just no, no letters. Hashtag.

Take warning. The hashtag take warning instead of hashtag claws up. We'll know what it means. Confuse the hell out of the Carolina Hurricanes. We could easily dominate the Carolina Hurricanes social media. Yeah. Just make sure that they're all very pro-capital statements just that they were like, what the hell is going on here?

We should do like take warning one or something, like add something on it so everyone knows that it's the real take warning, right? Take warning. Take. Take. Capital W. I was just going to say that, but I think that that is the same thing. Take warning.

Take warming. Take warming. For hot takes. Yes. Okay. Take warming. Yeah. That's the hashtag for the capitals.

Take warming. Take warming. Yep. Okay. Not as good as fuck. Yeah. Yeah. Don't put that box.

I see what you're doing right now. You said the claws are gone. What about claws down? Nope. I don't think we do that either. All right. Hank, what do you got? Your personal fire fest.

Well, my personal fire fest is kind of this segment because I have a fire fest within this fire fest, but I can't talk about it. So that makes it my fire fest. Okay. That's very good. That's good. That's a good fire fest. Yeah.

I'll explain it someday. Yeah, we're going to explain it someday. I'm a bit of a talking about it. Yeah. That's your fire fest. Your fire fest segment is my fire fest. Because you can't think of one. No, because I can't publicly say what my fire fest is.

You have a really good one. Yeah. You have an awesome girlfriend, but she lives in Canada. Yeah. Pretty much. Okay. Got it. Got it.

My personal fire fest is I got a buddy, very good friend of mine, who is going to get a vasectomy for master's weekend and that's the official sign that I'm way too old. That's a real big fire fest. That is a fire fest. Yeah. It's a big fire fest. Yeah. It's a big fire fest.

It's a big fire fest. It's a big fire fest. It's a big fire fest. So it's like any plan it for master's weekend. So fuck. Well, I mean, it's a fire fest. At least he's being proactive. Yes.

That's true, but it's a fire fest. It is a big fire fest. That's one of those ones where you're just like, damn, okay. This is happening. Really? This is life has passed us by. Does he know about pulling out? Well, he's got three kids, so maybe not.

Yeah, probably not. Yeah, probably not. It'll be interesting what happens with the text change tomorrow after the segment airs. Let's get to our interview. Before we get to Vinnie and Paulie D, I want to talk to you guys about our friends, Postmates. Listen, Postmates is your personal food delivery, grocery delivery, whatever you can think of delivery service all year round.

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Honey, the smart shopping assistant that saves you time and money when you're shipping online. Okay, here they are. Vinny and Pauly D. Okay, we now welcome on two guests. It is DJ Pauly D and Vinny from the Jersey Shore. They have a new show out, Double Shot of Love. You guys actually going to find love? We can't tell you.

Got to watch. Got to watch. What do you mean? We're in lockdown right now. So. After this show. Like Bachelor Style. We filmed it already.

Okay, let me ask a different way. When you went into the show, were you like, I'm about to find love? We were open to it. I mean, we did the whole random smashing on Jersey Shore for 10 years. So we were definitely open to something different for this. Meaning less random, 20 girls in one house smashing. Yeah, it's not as great as it seems. Try dating one woman, let alone 20 at the same time.

So it's not that glamorous. How would you compare this show to The Bachelor? It's like a ratchet informal version of The Bachelor. Okay, yeah, I'm a big ratchet guy. Yeah. What do you guys give to him instead of roses to move on to the next round? Well, you know, cab ceremony. Cab ceremony.

No, do you guys, do you have to change that? Because Uber's more popular than cabs now. Do you have to say Uber's here? It doesn't sound the same. I tried it. It doesn't sound right. Dude, give it to us. Yeah, it's like cabs here.

Uber's here, it doesn't sound right. Uber's here. Yeah, cab's here is better. That's just trademark too. You can't say it on TV. Yeah, we'll bleep that out. Yeah, we can say it now. We need to get a little something in the back pocket.

Let me just say, the way, you guys are just, you're so swaggy coming here. The way you're rocking the headphones right off the bat, that's to protect the quaff, right? We already know. Yeah, and then the chains around the neck. I think those are bigger chains than a quarter-rail Patterson had on. Yeah.

I think that's a new record for part of my chain. How much is the total for those chains? I lost count. I'm bad at math. That's a far, that's a big ass chain. Why don't you wear chains, bigger chains? I wear chains. Yeah, I mean, that's like a little baby chain versus Paulie's chain.

I would be walking with a hunchback if I wore those. I'm like, 155. So what happens when you guys are best friends? What happens on the show when you both have your eye on one girl? We physically fight. Tag team. Physically fight?

Who wins that fight? Wait, are we talking about a fighter? Yeah. No, that happens because we're all, anyone's up for grabs. We can date any of the girls, and they can date both of us. But we're so close, we never have tension with each other. The tension's with the girls. They fight, yeah.

You guys ever think about being Mormons, and you can just marry all the girls at once? I've thought about it. It's a good idea. Do some soaking, you ever heard of what soaking is? They can drink them. Or Kelly's shit. No, it's not.

Soaking is when Mormons, they put the penis in the vagina and they just rest. There's no friction. Soaking. You just lay there, you just lay your dick in there. You have to throw a hole in the sheets, are you done that? He played like Peter off, and then. Yeah, you soak, right?

Yeah, I soak. I'm tired of my girls just hanging out. Yeah, let's just soak. Yeah, exactly. I feel like I'm getting my heart rate up. Hey, what does your mom think about this show? About soaking? Well, after that, next time you see her,

because your mom obviously is a part of Jersey Shore. We're Italian boys, and no one can ever be good enough for our mom. So I think she just takes everyone like a joke. Well, it's fair that no one can be good enough, because if you find love, they're moving into your mom's house, right? Isn't that how they tell you to do it?

No, no, no. Yeah, exactly, right? It's like a roommate. She just doesn't want to be a roommate. Yeah, she'll always be in my house. Well, what happened was I bought a house, because we made a lot of money on reality shows. So yeah.

What the house next door? So I bought the house, and I got my mom, the mother-in-law, suite downstairs. That's how I lived with her. But then I graduated, and I bought her her own house. I have my own, and she has her own. Are they next to each other? No, they're like 15 minutes apart.

That's far away with her. Not too far, yeah. Was she upset about that? She still does the laundry. OK, nice. I dropped the laundry off, and then she brings it back to me. Many don't live with his mama no more. That's huge, man.

She yells that shit to my neighbors. All right, so you guys are living in a house with 20 women? Is that what the premise of the show is? Yes. Now, do you have to use pickup lines with them? Because you guys had some pretty good ones on the Jersey Shore. Did you have to use pickup lines with the women, or did they come to you with the real aggressive stuff?

Well, the crazy part is that they didn't know what celebrities they were dating. That's quite a surprise. Exactly. So I was like, yo, are they going to know who the fuck I am? Who they think? They thought it was Post Malone. Post Malone.

You guys are an upgrade. Zach Efron. That's a downgrade. Zach Efron definitely have a little bit of hire there. What level of celebrity do you guys think you are now? Like, people ask us, and we're like, D, D-minus. You're D? D-minus, I'd say, yeah.

OK, OK. I would say, I was like, I'm a C. C? That's not bad. What about you? I was respectful. You a little higher with the DJ stuff? Yeah, he's like a B.

B plus? Yeah. I live with that. That's good. A is like Brad Pitt. Yeah, A is like, yeah. A is like, you're not doing an interview with us. Right.

Paulie's like, next in line for Jennifer Aniston, then. A, yeah, right. You're right there, man. That's actually huge. All right, so Jersey Shore, you guys are still filming that as well, right? The union. And I was reading about it.

Basically, everyone is like doing, like, Ronny's in rehab. I read that one sentence, like, Ronny's in rehab. Mike's in prison. Mike's in prison. Jenny's divorced. This is like a bad country song. Yeah. Is Nick crazy?

And you can't write this shit. Like, there's no script to that. Right. Fake that content. This is our real life. Do you think any of that, like, you know, obviously, those are some of those things haven't gone well for those guys. You think it has to do with, like, the celebrity

and being on a reality show? Maybe had to do that path in life. Yeah, I guess. You know, and, you know, people, like, Mike had a substance issue. And, you know, having money and unlimited funds. And you can get that anywhere you want, probably. Add it to that. So how did you guys turn out so well?

Say no to drugs. Yeah. Yeah. And you're living with your mom, probably helps. Yeah. But mom keeps me alive. I stayed away from the drugs. Say no to the wrong drugs.

That's what I always say. Yeah. Yeah. That's actually a good point. So that's getting filmed right now, the reunion? Yeah, we're still filming that right now. We filmed, like, we have a lot of episodes already saved, like Mike's wedding and him going to court.

And then we're doing more now. You guys still keep in touch with him? Yeah. That's the app that we use to talk to him. Like, every day. In prison. In prison? Yeah.

Face time? White-collar prison, right? Yeah. OK. He's in there with the Fire Festival guy. Is he playing? Yeah, that's right. So he's with Billy McFarlane.

Wait, for real? Are they cooking up some good schemes or what? I don't know. I bet you they come out with it. Mike's going to come out and be like, I know this guy now. Well, he's also in there with the guy that hacked Jennifer. And it was Jennifer Lawrence's phone to get her nudes out. So maybe he can learn how to hack phones.

Yeah. Spooky ghost. Holy shit. I was like, wow. So this guy could be learning some stuff in there. Damn, that's like a big-time white-collar prison. Yeah. Is Shkreli in there?

Yeah. Does he run shit on the inside? What's that like? Where does he fall, as far as he's told you? I'm hearing he's gotten all the cookies. Yeah. They all like him. All love.

Yeah, he's getting it. He better not come out fat, because that's like, when you come out of prison, fat's like, what happened there? Yeah. He said he works out like three times a day. All right, that's good. What does he get out? September unless he gets early, you know, release.

OK. OK. Yeah, well, hoping he gets out earlier. I hope he gets out for the summertime. Yeah, that's going to miss that short, huh? Yeah. Do you guys still go down to the Jersey Shore in the summer? When we film, pretty much.

Yeah. But I have, like, you know, I'll get a little older now, so. Well, I'm sure you get mobbed down there, right? Yeah, like those places, like the DJs and the Jenkinsins, they're hard to go to, whether they're a shit show. But there's, like, kind of chill places there, too. I DJ in Atlantic City. It's the closest I get to the show.

OK. Yeah, I was going to ask, at what age do you feel like you have to tone it down at the shore? Because, like, up through your 30, until you're 30 years old, I think it's all fair game. And then people kind of start to, like, taper off the party scene there. Yeah, well, I mean, I was an idiot.

Like, I went through all those years, and I never saw the beach or the sun or anything. I just went there to get drunk. So now I go there for the sun. Now I go there, and I'm like, oh, shit. Like, it feels good to just get away and go to the beach. And enjoy the show. Yeah, enjoy, like, outdoors and stuff.

Do you guys think that Tommy Cheeseballs was, like, the grandfather of your show? You remember him? He was an all-time reality show. True Life, MTV, Tommy Cheeseballs was, like, the first. He put Seaside on the map. Yeah. I didn't even know Seaside exists till that guy.

Yeah. I didn't know what a cheeseball was. Yes, all-time episode. When I saw it, I was like, wow, this is what the guy was eating. And he was trying to find, like, a wife on the Jersey Shore. Trying to find love. Yeah, I'm really like, come on, man. It didn't work out for Ronnie, so.

No. Do you guys still talk to Sammy? Yeah, I mean, every now and then she'd to protect you. Not regularly. It didn't sound like you really talked to her. Well, because, yeah, I don't really talk to her, does Ronnie still talk about her a lot?

It's kind of weird when he does. That was like 10 years ago. We tried to get him to, but. Yeah, and then it gets really awkward, and then he starts putting his fists through things. He has, like, a kid and another girl that he's dealing with. Yeah, he's calmed down a little. OK, OK.

As he calmed down. Looking back on it, is there anything that you guys wish you had done differently while on the television show? Hmm. What I would have done differently. Maybe I would have invested in some of the clubs out there because they would like to run the show.

Yeah, that's a good call. They should have given you a taste. Yeah, exactly. We're bringing people in at that point, right? Now the Seaside won't have the show back. They close down those clubs. Really? We literally brought that place to life.

Like, the economy, every business was booming, and now they're like, yeah, we want to go in a different direction. So they give us a problem about filming. That's, like, very counterintuitive to everything they should be. Blows my mind, too. Same thing, like, when the governor and politicians

from New Jersey were talking shit about Jersey Shore, I'm like, do you guys not like money in your state? Yeah. People go there for vacation. People from Australia were flying to Seaside. Canada, people were just going there because of the show. I don't think there was anything necessarily wrong with what you guys were doing.

It's basically what you do when you're in your early 20s. Not even. We're saints compared to what people do in their shore houses. You just happen to have a camera around you all the time. Which makes it actually us well-behaved. Right, the camera on us. What's the worst we're doing hooking up? Did that ever fuck with you?

I mean, we kind of have that here, where there's a camera on us all the time. Did it ever fuck with you when you were just like, man, I just want to get away from this camera because it's following me everywhere? It fucks with me when I'm not filming, because I'm like, where the hell's the camera? It messes me up.

I'm used to it in front of my face or a mic. I feel like there's a mic on me. Right. We've been doing it for 10 years. Well, you get used to that. So we don't know if you're fucked up, because you're still living it. When you're 50, you're like, damn.

It's like, start yelling at random people. We have real PTSD after filming. Yelling at shadows and whatnot. Your hair is even better in person. I just want to say that is sick. When you turn 50, are you still going to have the same quaff or is there going to be time at some point to dial it back? No, no, I'm going to keep it.

Even when it turns gray, it'll be a gray blob. That would actually be sex. How long does it take to get that ready? About 20 minutes. OK, that's not that bad. Mary fuck killed Jim Tan Laundry. I would marry the Jim, because I need that forever. I would kill Tan, because I could take her to leave it.

And I'd fuck Laundry. I used to do that in high school. My hamper was a disaster. I would kill Laundry, fuck Tan, and marry the Jim. OK, so you'd be stinky, but you'd at least have a nice tan. You'd have your blood going, and I'd be jacked. Are you still on your diet? That was wild when you were eating the cheese off the pizza.

Yeah, that was annoying. Yeah, I know. I was annoyed. I mean, you have to do it, though. I just took a couple of bites for a pizza review. You did? Did you spit it out after? No, but I threw out the entire slice,

because I'm a foodie. I love pizza, but I can only do it once in a while. So do you have a cheek day? Yeah, like a couple times a month. It's a movie, though. I'm doing Chippendales. It's a movie.

You got to film it. Throw in Vegas. It's cookies. It's ice cream. It's pizza. It's next month. Oh, I go in, yeah. He hates himself after it.

Yeah, of course. I'm doing Chippendales, though, so I have to take my shirt off. What do you mean you're doing Chippendales? I'm hosting it for a month. Like, I'm resident guest host. So you're going to be a stripper for a month? Yeah, he was practicing his helicopter on the way over here. This is it.

Yeah, basically. So you're going to be a stripper for a month? I'm not going to strip. What does your mom think about that? I'm the host. She's coming. She's going to escort. Not strip.

She's going to escort you? Yeah, right. That's actually the champagne room. I'm not going to let her see it. That's not a bad place to be, because you got all the girls coming in off the strip to watch the show. It's the best place to be. It's the best place for a single person, a guy to go.

It's nothing but single women there. That are there to have a good time. You know what I'm talking about? Yes, have a really good time. Yes. That's why I'm going to go see it. I'm going to go to a show. Yes.

And just catch the fallout. Yeah. I want to jump back to the gym tan laundry thing real quick. Now, is that always in order of gym, then tan, then laundry? No. Because that, OK, good. That never made sense to me. The order is never in the same order.

I find that we never do it in the right order, right? Because we drop off laundry first, go to the gym, tan on the way back, or vice versa, with the tan, and then gym always flip-flops. OK. And some places it's harder to do. When we're in Jersey, it's such a small town. Everything's on one block.

Then we started doing it in Italy and Miami. And now you're driving a half hour from the gym to the laundry. And Italy had no tanning beds. There was one half a tanning bed at a nail salon. Did you guys get any backlash for going to Italy? Oh my god, so much. Really?

Who was the most mad? People in Italy weren't mad. It's always the people here, like the Italian-Americans. They always gave a shit, but I loved it. Not everyone on the show was even Italian. Right. Right. And they're like, you guys are not even from Jersey.

We know. We only rented a show house in Jersey. People go to vacation there. They don't understand the premise of reality television. What was that audition process like to get on the show? I didn't audition. They found me on Myspace. They're like, you got the job.

That's a throwback. They saw your hair. They left me a message saying that they liked my look. And I didn't know why. Because I was like, this is in a tank top with the Italian flag in the background. So I was tan, muscles, and then the hair. And there was that, right back around then, was 2009, 2008.

There was that famous Guido picture that was going viral on your number. They all looked like you. Yeah, it was me. That was my family. Yeah, exactly. It was your family reunion. That was me.

Yeah. I'm the only one that kept it alive. Yeah, what about you? I did some crazy audition in an interview in a shitty hotel in Seaside, New Jersey. It looked like some weird Craigslist thing. The only reason why I thought it was somewhat legit, I recognized the girl interviewing me

from another reality show, from actually Tila Tequila. Oh, another classic. I'm like, yeah, exactly. That was the original shot of love, yes. So I'm like, oh, I know you. I'm like, all right, this kind of seems legit. But I still thought I was getting murdered. I took a couple shots, and then I just like did my thing.

And then they called me like a year later and said, can you film the show? I'm, I don't know. And then the rest is history. Yeah, here I am. Yeah, we didn't know what we were filming. We had no name or nothing. No, until you get into the house.

Didn't even tell you anything. Even after we filmed it, it had no name, nothing. I come back to my regular life, went back to DJing in Rhode Island, like nothing ever happened. Months later, we started seeing commercials for the show. I like took my L-sign. Wait, so you guys, you film it, you go back to your regular life. At what point were you like, holy shit,

this is way bigger than we ever thought it would be? Because it blew up. Yeah, when it aired, I didn't know that that many people were watching it till I went out and pumped gas in my car, and I was getting people coming up to me. They're like, yo, that's crazy on that show. Also, within two episodes, everyone's flying to LA, going to award shows, going on J-Leno,

Jimmy Fallon, David Letterman back then. That normally doesn't happen for a reality show. So we're like, oh, shit, this is different. Now, after you guys tape it, you just think that, or in the process, you just think it's like another season of the real world or something like that. That's exactly right. Not even.

I thought it was a one-hour special. Tommy Cheeseballs. Exactly, yeah. I thought it would be like a local celebrity, get some chicks. Bunch of choosers on the show. Well, so is there anything you look back on? You're like, man, that fad is no longer

cool anymore, like fist-pumping or anything like that? Yeah, Paulie's hair. Yeah. Well, I mean, I actually like it, because he's keeping it so that eventually we're back in it. He was the only one back then that's still alive. Yeah, but it's a thing. It was already out of date.

And he does it now. If you're going to be on a reality show, you have to have a thing. No doubt. That makes you snag out a little bit. Everything, fist-pumping, the grats. We still wear these graphic tees that we literally like have to wait to them.

No, those are sweet. I still wear them. Yeah, those are sweet. I still fist-pump. That's like my only answer to that. I can't say this conversation next to him, because he's exactly the same. Yeah, but I love it.

Yeah, it's like you just keep doing it. Venture's going to come back in this style. And you're going to be the guy. That's that. Exactly. You guys, wait, so you're from Rhode Island. And where are you from? Staten Island.

Staten Island. OK, so did you grow up a Jets or a Giants fan? I grew up a Giants fan. Actually, yeah, a Giants fan. How many more years do you think they should keep you a lie around? Probably like four, five, six, quarterback for life. They're going to anyway, even though, you know,

I don't think getting rid of O'Dell was good. Yeah, that sucks. But yeah. And you are tight with the Gronks, right? Yeah, Gronk, and I'm really sad about the whole. You think he's going to keep playing? I do. Yeah.

How many games is he going to wait till he comes back? I don't know how many games. I'm trying to get the inside scoop over here. You and Gronk are great best friends. If Brady calls him, I mean, how could you say no to Brady? In my opinion. Does Gronk come out to your DJ shows? I feel like that's like you two are like.

Yeah, he's awesome. Yeah, two peas in a pod. Tell him what he was doing. In Vegas, he was spiking pineapples on my stage. He just finds stuff to spike. If it's something that's football shaped, he'll spike it, no matter what it is. Oh, that's so perfect.

That's so perfect. All right, well, this has been awesome. So double shot of love. What is the premiere? Tomorrow, April 11th. April 11th. 8 PM. OK, so hopefully you guys found love.

I don't know. Why are you looking at me like that? Why are you looking at me like that? Why are you looking at me like that? I feel like you found a, you have a girlfriend. I feel like you're looking. You're looking for the answer. Well, you have to find out.

You've got to watch it. I think you guys just found out that you love women. I think Vinny found love. We like sex. Pauly, you're still single. Hey, wow, gee, you guys, you've got to watch. So what have you, what have you been doing with your girlfriend since?

Like, have you been doing it? I don't know. I don't know if she exists. OK. Have you guys, last question, the bachelor, the last season, the bachelor, that guy pretended he was a virgin? He pretended?

Yeah. Didn't he? I mean, was that true? I had that. Very, very well-grown that. Did you guys ever think about telling a girl you're a virgin? You think that would be hot for a girl? It doesn't fly for us, because they watch us have sex on TV.

Yeah. You know what? Next time, you just got to soak. Bring soaking back. Soak on TV. That way, no one can judge you. No, baby, he sucks at sex. No, dude, I was soaking.

There was no friction whatsoever. You know how people are like, I'm a hugger? I'm a soaker. Yeah, you're a soaker. I think you're going to soak. I soak. Yeah, I think Paulie's going to soak at some point. I already soak.

I didn't know it was a thing. Yeah, you've been soaking by accident. I've been soaking. All right, guys. Thanks so much. Appreciate it. Thank you. Appreciate it.

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Kite products are not associated with nor sponsored by Juul Labs Incorporated. OK, let's get to some segments. First up, we got a woe. PFT, you got a woe for us? Yeah, big time woe. This comes, oh, I guess I don't. Breaking moves.

Breaking moves. The Grizzlies have dismissed their coach and reassigned their GM. It's kind of a this league breaking moves. David Fisdale, so long. Not really, but. Take that for data. No, we know him, yeah.

My connolly is very pissed off. Everybody likes him. He's already subtweeting about it. So it looks like they're rebuilding. Which kind of reminds me when I was in a rebuilding phase in my life, I was going to the gym. I was drinking energy drinks and stuff, but it wasn't getting me the results I wanted

until I started drinking low-fat chocolate milk. It's backed by science. It's trusted by athletes. It's backed by real science. And more than 20 studies now support the benefits of low-fat chocolate milk for post-exercise recovery. Just pick some up today at your local store

and check out BuiltWithChocolateMilk.com for the real science. The Grizzlies are always going to be rebuilding. That's kind of what they're up to. I think I feel like the ceiling on the Grizz is giving a team a tough series in the second round. And fun to watch. They're fun to watch sometimes.

I miss Gritt and Grind. Yeah, me too. Joking Noah was fun to have back. The Grizzlies should just be that team that's like reinvigorates guys' careers. Yeah, Zach Randolph. Joking Noah's ass around. Out of the NBA.

Boom, Grizzlies, let's do it. Jimmer Ferdette, boom. Just have that be their whole thing. Like, hey, this guy you forgot about, bring him on the Grizzlies. Tom Thomas, just dudes that play great defense and they're terrible on offense. Yeah, just do it.

All right, you got a wall? Yeah, I do have a wall. This comes from Jeff is tall on Twitter, noted Twitter user Jeff is tall. If you tried to sex a black hole, your penis would be the longest it's ever been followed immediately by being the smallest it's ever been. So like jumping in cold water?

Whoa, I was going to say just like normal sex. Yeah, wait, so how does that work? It's just like normal sex. Your penis gets very long and then very small. But what is the actual black hole? So black holes are on the news this week is NASA took a snapshot of one. And what they do is they just, they suck things, right?

So they suck the light from stars. And then once the light from the star gets close to the black hole and inside the black hole, it gets compacted and disappears. Okay, so it's gone. So it's gone. So your dick would be gone, actually. Gone forever.

I don't know if being gone counts as small. Gone just counts as done. It's the absence of. Gone is the absence of penis. Right, so there's nothing. You can't actually comment on the size. That's true. All right, so, okay.

That's actually, you're wrong. Jeff is tall. Myth debunked. Jeff is tall, you're probably not even tall. All right, we have a, well that makes sense. What was this one for? This is from Jack Dorsey. He is the CEO of Twitter.

He's been in the news a lot recently. And he has some very, very strange eating habits. Okay. So he says, I'll go from Friday till Sunday. I won't have dinner on Friday. I won't have dinner or any meal on Saturday. And the first time I'll eat will be Sunday evening. I've done that where I do an extended fast

where I'm just drinking water. The first time I did it, on day three, I felt like I was hallucinating. It was a weird state to be in. This is the point of no return with rich people just doing random shit. Like, hey, you know what? It'd be fun to be starving to death for three days.

Yeah. Okay. No, that's the thing about being rich. I think you get so uncomfortable being comfortable. If you're comfortable all the time, eventually you get uncomfortable and then you have to make yourself uncomfortable to be comfortable again.

So he has to be in pain to be like, okay, now I know how normal people feel. This is also the new drug. The new drug is to just deprive your body of what it needs to survive and then be like, but I hallucinated. Hey, I didn't sleep for three weeks. It was wild.

I started hallucinating. Right. If you go on a run for 20 miles, you'll get a wicked runner's hide. Oh man. I got it stuck doing that. I got to start moving my body. Yeah.

I'm gonna submerge myself in freezing cold water for an hour and guess what? My heart stopped. It was like the greatest cocaine I've ever had. What? I'm gonna suspend myself for six hours by putting fish hooks through my nipples and intricate series of pulleys to raise me off the ground.

You're fucking rich, dude. Just do designer drugs that none of us can do. Or if you wanna feel like you're poor, just actually just give some of your money away. Yeah. That's a rush. Give all your money away. You know what I've heard is the ultimate rush?

Giving a shitload of money to podcasters. That is. It gets you just. It gets you fucking high. You get so high. Shit. It's like Molly. Yeah.

Molly Smiley. You guys know nothing about Molly. Yeah. Molly's like Molly. Molly's like Molly. All right. Next up, I do a quick seeing red, but I don't even,

I actually think the bulls have beaten it out of me. Jim Boylan's gonna get a three year contract and John Paxson got in front of the media and basically was like, I think we're still a destination for free agents, which makes no sense because the bulls have never been a destination for free agents and they just hired a glorified Jim teacher

to be the coach for the next three years because they don't like change and they're lazy and they want a guy who will just do whatever they say. It's sad to see you reach this point, but I mean. No, I'm actually mad now. I'm getting mad. They did it to us.

They did it to us. It's their fault. You have Jim Boy, how can you get mad about Jim Boylan for three years? It's just like, it should be dejection. Right. Dejection is just like whatever. Well, what they're doing is they essentially are like,

we just don't really want to hire someone new because then the new person is gonna come in and be like, hey, everything you guys do is fucked up and stupid. So they're like, let's just keep this guy because at least he won't call us dumb. This is exactly how the Redskins franchise operates. It is just a series of dejections.

Zion, maybe Zion. Yeah, that's your hope. Yeah, Zion or John Morant. That's gonna be the biggest night of the bulls and probably since Derek Rose left is like, that's gonna be it. The Night of Ping Pong balls go. Speaking of Derek Rose,

why is the name of his movie poo? Because that's his nickname. You guys need like a real good name for a movie. You need a great good luck charm for Draft Night. You need a kid up there. You need like one of the Jackie Robinson, Little League kids up there. Pick a ball.

That'd be kind of awkward. They're like 18. Yeah, that's fine. I don't care. They're the most successful team besides the Cubs from Chicago. That would be pretty funny. If you just threw them up there, yeah.

You need to figure this out. You need to figure out who the ultimate Jim Belushi. Final answer. Jim Belushi. Okay, done. Final answer. Is he okay?

What? Is he okay now? Jim Belushi? Yeah. What happened to him? Just making sure he's okay. What do you mean? What happened to him?

Oh, I was thinking about John Ritter. You were thinking of John. I was thinking of John Ritter. Oh. I know about John. Belushi. Yeah. Got it.

Yeah, Jim Belushi. Oh, no, here's what you do. Bill Murray. Get it? That's a good one. Get Bill Murray to do this. He's probably gonna be a Zanger game, so. Yeah.

All right. Last up before, oh no, we have two more. I have a C-keek question. Promo code TAKE, you get $10 off your C-keek purchase. Marlins Man, thank you for the shout out. That was very nice of you. Not paid for that shout out to all of his followers, but put in promo code TAKE, you get $10 off your C-keek purchase.

Perfect time to do it, by the way. In April, you can go to a baseball game for like nothing. You know what you just did? You gave $10 to the troops. Yeah, I did. Because you saved Marlins Man $10. Uh-huh. All right, so here is, this is actually perfect.

A segue from baseball. PFT, embrace debate, slash question. Do you feel bad for Chris Davis, who is now 0 for 53 in his last 53? Well, he's had a couple of walks mixed in there. No, because it's so much fun to watch. Okay. And if the Orioles were gonna be a threat

to do anything this year, then maybe I would be. But he's helping them. I feel bad for him. I think the number would be 100 where we'd go from sad to funny again, but from like 20 to 30. Or probably like 30 to 100, it's sad. Okay, I can get behind that train of thought, but at the same time, you're telling me that

if he reached like 97, you wouldn't be standing up cheering for him to get to 100? Well, he's already electric. It would get fun again a little bit before 100. You're right. It'd be like 87 would be right where it's like, I'm not sad about it. I'm out rooting for him to get to 100.

Yeah, I still think it's so much fun to watch. They should really just let him get ahead. Some team, they had a shift on him today. I was like, that's just mean. He hit it right into the shift. And it was like, that could have been a single. Just let him play straight up. He needs a new bat.

He also, just cork your bat at this point. Another embrace debate about Chris Davis. I actually think if he's this deep, if he's gonna be this deep into like, I think he's over, I can't remember what is this season. I think it's like 30 or something. He's this deep into this season not having a hit. I think he's just not gonna hit

because having a batting average of zero is better than having a batting average of like 50. Like the minute he gets a hit, it's gonna look worse. Cause you know what happens? You add the extra decimal. Right, right. So zero is like, oh, maybe he just hasn't had a lot of played appearances.

He's a pitcher. Also zero isn't really a number, right? As we discussed, it's just the absence of Dick. Did you see Trevor Rosenthal had a five straight game or appearances where he didn't record an out. So he had an infinity. Yeah, he had an infinity era for quite a while. He's actually in a weird way, I think,

harder to do than Chris Davis because I actually think that if I like, if you gave me five appearances, I'd get an out. Yeah, someone to catch a fly ball. Right, yeah. Yeah, you'd fuck him up by throwing it so slow. They hit a line drive. They would hit one right at the first base.

Right, or hit a warning track shot. Like, wait, that was way too slow. Yeah, you get a nice gust of wind. Throw an EFIS, right at him. So yeah, I feel bad right now, but I will laugh later. The kid from rookie of the year got three outs. Yes, he did.

Throw in what, 40 miles per hour? Oh yeah. Fuck yes, he did. All right, last up before FAQs, it's a new segment, new segment alert. It's called Trey Wingo Anchorman References. Yes. So this one is, will that escalate it quickly?

Yeah, it's really, it's a very versatile segment. So you can do, will that escalate it quickly? You can do, I'm not mad, I'm just impressed. Can we do some rules too, wedding crashers? Yeah, yeah, we'll make, this is all Anchorman. Wedding crashers is part of the Anchorman Cinematic Universe. Yes, it's old school as well. Yes, absolutely, yeah.

So those are the three money ones. This is from Rashard Mendenhall. He wanted to weigh in on the ongoing Steelers saga that will apparently never end. He says, all right, I'll end the mystery. B, that stands for Ben. Ben's racist, and Antonio Brown's black. He had to catch balls from a racist quarterback.

Every honest player knows it, it's not a big deal. He was just supposed to take his lickings and move on like a slave for real. Well, that escalated quickly. Yeah, it escalated real fast. It's actually been like two, two and a half months. But it's still escalated. It's still escalated very quickly.

I don't really understand this either, because so Big Ben is racist and plays in the NFL. I feel like it would be tough to stick around as a quarterback in the NFL if you were very, very racist. I don't know, I think you could do it. You don't think so? Well, if you let your racism get in the way of your play, if you're like, I'm not gonna throw the ball

to a black, wide receiver, then you're just gonna suck at being quarterback, and you'll get out of the league pretty quickly. So if you can check your racism at the door, I think it's possible. Yeah, probably. But he's saying that Big Ben's racism, every honest player knows it.

So everyone knows it. It's very out in the open. They say there are no racist and foxholes either, like on the battlefield. True. Actually they say no atheists and foxholes, but I think it goes the same way. No racists as well.

So I guess we can just say Mike Tomlin has officially lost his former locker room as well. Yes, yes. Oh, that's gotta be really hard for Big Ben too, as a racist. Yeah. To have Mike Tomlin as his coach. That would be very, very, you know what?

I'm gonna withhold judgment on this. I need another former stealer to weigh in. I need either Franco Harris, because he's Italian, right? Mm-hmm. So I need Franco Harris to either moderate this or... Yeah, he's problematic. Why?

He's very, very unsupported, Joe Paterno. Oh, okay. That's right, yeah. Very. So Franco, he canceled. You're making a march to Happy Valley. The Immaculate Receptions canceled. It's gone.

For good memories. I'll wait for Mike Florio's old quarterback from the book that he wrote, Quarterback of the Future. It was a time traveling quarterback that went back to play for the Steelers. Mm-hmm. You know this book?

No. Oh, you gotta read it. Okay. That's right, his name's Jake DiCato. Imaginary former stealer, Jake DiCato. I need you to weigh in on whether or not Big Ben is a racist. Did he write that after or before he killed Terry Bradshaw? He wrote that before he killed Terry Bradshaw.

So yeah, back before he had blood on his hands. Yeah, yeah. New show idea. At like two in the morning on ESPN or Fox, they should just have all the former players that hated their quarterbacks in a roundtable discussion. Yeah. So you can have like Greg Jennings.

Mm-hmm. You can have Rashard Mendenhall. You can have what's the other guy, Jermakyl Finley. Just anyone who hates their old teammate and they just sit there and they bitch about their old teammate for three hours and they get it out so that we don't have to listen to it every day.

Yeah, it should be moderated by Tarell Owens. Yeah, perfect. Perfect. Otrosyncho. Yes. Otrosyncho, yeah. I feel like Otrosyncho got along with most people. He liked Carson Palmer.

I remember they drove that time. That's right. For Cincinnati to Indianapolis to watch Peyton Manning. Yeah, I think it was mostly Carson Palmer that was just like, why does this guy, who likes me so much, hang out with me all the time, he's very weird. Right, why does he make us stop to go to every McDonald's on the way?

Yeah. This is weird. But yeah, someone make that show. I'd watch it. Never. Not. Oh, shit. Never not.

Yeah, so I would watch it. Fuck, yeah. Mindfuck. I'd watch the shit out of that show. Hank, go do the FAQs. How many interviews are you guys sitting on at any given time? Oh, that's a very good question. Great question.

I'd say two to three. Maybe sometimes a little more. Two to three is usually like the sweet spot. Right now we're sitting on Drew Brees, Rick Fox. We pull these out. OAR. OAR. OK.

So we're three. Yeah. Pudge Martinez. Oh yeah, Pudge Martinez. That's right. We do have that one in the can. What would you say? Two or three?

Sometimes we're flush, sometimes we're bust. Yeah. It's a lot like our gambling accounts. I'd say. So yeah, there are times when we're short, where we have to scrimp and scrape at the last second and call up Paul Bisonette or somebody like that. That's a pretty good telltale sign

if we have Mr. Portnoy on, Biz Nasty, or I'm trying to think, Riscilla or Riscilla, then we don't have anyone and it's literally the last person on our phone. Explain the part of my take logo, please. OK. It's Big Cat Stella, who was a big part of the show when we were doing Skype, because she would chime in from never sign.

Now stop barking. She was definitely a third member. And then my Twitter avatar. And then Hank. And then Hank. Yeah, I was looking at the one behind me. I was looking at the one behind me. Oh yeah, there's two.

One is just PFT and I, but it's also PFT's Twitter avatar, not me. Oh, and then the car stick is on there too. Car stick. And there's also a couple that are, I think we did a holiday one. A bottle of Mad Dog. Yeah, there's a bottle of Mad Dog.

Yeah, so we have a. It was always supposed to be Mad Dog, but copyright. We couldn't put that in the official logo. Sneaky one of those things. You can't say that, Hank, that we're doing an ad deal with one of our competitors. Yeah. Sneaky one of those things, though, our logo.

I think we had a lot of success. Like it gave us some success early on that we didn't do intentionally. But if you look at like podcast logos, there's not a lot of logos that are cartoons of the host. Right. Do you know what I mean? Usually it's like.

It makes you stop. It's a combo breaker when you're scrolling through the podcast app. It's like, oh, this one, for some reason, stands out. Who are these idiots? I'll give it a shot, even though they look like shitheads. Right. Like all the NPR ones are just like, just, just words.

They are. Guess what? They're just words. Yeah. It's like when you go to a restaurant and you want a picture menu. Yeah. Pretty much.

Pictures are the new words. And then Joe Rogan's face is all over the place. Joe Rogan sums up. He dominates everything. It's crazy. It's the DMT. It's fucking crazy how many of his podcasts are at the top at any given time.

He's in a good location. Shout out to him. We just need to have Alex Jones on the show. Joe Rogan, come on the podcast. Please. At what point does smashed avocado become guacamole? OK. The third smash.

You think it's three smashes and you're playing with yourself. One. Yeah. Smash it once. That's fine. Smash it twice. That's OK. Third smash.

Smash it three times. I was wondering what you're doing at the Arnold. Exactly. Kind of creepy. The real answer is when you add like salt, lime juice, and whatever other ingredients like peas is a big one that the New York Times put out there. Good old guacamole with peas.

Love my pea guacamole. This person wants us to give some game of thrones predictions. We're not unfortunately able to do that. We will on Sunday. That's Hank's Firefest. We have a big announcement on Sunday. We'll just have to save it. Yeah.

OK. Thanks for reading that question. You're welcome. Yeah. Here's another real question. Why are you guys always so mean to Hank? He's just doing his job. That's a real question.

I don't think we're mean to you. Cranky, hanky? I think we know the button suppress. I'm like Phil Jackson. And I know exactly how to motivate my players. And the best way to do it with you is to kind of make fun of you sometimes. That was a preview of our Rick Fox interview.

Yeah. I think Hank, part of the reason why Hank is so good at his job is he can take it. And he only gets somewhat mad and decides to do stool scenes because he hates us. And honestly, new stool scenes out. All honesty, Hank is very, very good at his job. Very good.

You see people chirp him saying, oh, you just press record. That is just one of the two parts of his job. He does breaking moves. He does breaking moves too. So he's very, very good at everything involved with all facets of his job. So thank you, Hank. And we're actually not that easy to deal with sometimes

because we don't respond to stuff. It's true. That is true. We're really bad at responding. His yawns are also a great deterrent keeping away strangers. I love waking Hank up. And having him want to fight me. That was a nice compliment.

Keeps you alert. Let's compliment Hank real quick. When he has a beard, he's very handsome. I think he would have made a great cat owner for a week or so. And then the cat would have probably died. Yeah. Would have got lost in my life.

You know what, Hank? So the fourth member, a part of my take, Bubby slash Bubba slash Liam, is probably the most swagalicious guy I know. And Hank doesn't get too jealous about Bubby's swag. About his flow. And how sick his tattoos are.

I fucking hate his flow, though. His flow is awesome. I've instructed him to wear hats around me at all times. So that was a nice compliment, right? Mm-hmm. You thought, you know what? Here's a great compliment for you, Hank. You hired Bubba, the greatest producer in part of my take

history. That's true. And you hired him. Congratulations. Yeah. Your chain is cool. What's on your hand? I'm just literally describing things

Hank's wearing right now. Your chain is cool. Your shirt fits. What is the thing on your wrist? This? Yeah, what does it say? Blessing grateful to my friend, Jordan, that passed away. OK, so there you go.

Shout out to your good friend. Yes, that is awesome. You're drinking water, which is good. You got to stay hydrated. All right. Well, you're drinking out of a water bottle, which is illegal in this office now. Where'd you get that, bro?

It was for Rick Fox, but he didn't drink it. Where'd you get that sweet, sweet shit, huh? Wait, Rick Fox did open his water bottle. He spilled it everywhere. Are you drinking to the whole Rick Fox interview right now? We'll just explain everything. We have three hours. We'll see everyone on Monday.

Love you guys. Even you, Hank. I'll be gone, put up to your chin. Needless to say, I'm upset, it's a piece of it away. Better than the bike is OK. Stay up to me. It's the better to be safe than sorry. Take on me.

Take me on. I'll be gone, put up to your chin. I'll be gone, put up to your chin. I'll be gone, put up to your chin. I'll be gone.