Pardon My Take - Kendrick Perkins, Top 10 QB's Of All Time, Mt Flushmore of Places To Be Drunk

Episode Date: April 15, 2020

Sports have been scheduled and no tax day has everyone in a great move. Christian McCaffrey signs and we imagine what the perfect first game back would be (2:27 - 13:24). NFL 100 QB's and we rank our personal top 10 QB's of all time post 1980 (13:24 - 28:44). Hot Seat/Cool Throne (28:44 - 41:20). NBA Champion Kendrick Perkins joins the show to talk about his twitter beefs, playing with KG, his sons spending 16,000 on his credit card in fortnite and being a center in today's league (41:20 - 82:16). Mt Flushmore of places to be drunk and Guys on Chicks finish the show.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, ad-free, on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we have NBA Champion Kendrick Perkins. Great interview with Perk. He will just make you laugh, like his voice and his demeanor and his answers to things. Very, very funny, great guy, lot of fun, especially him talking about his son's racking up $16,000 on his credit cards for Fortnite bills.

We have the NFL 100 list, we're going to do QBs tonight. We're also going to give you our top 10 QBs of all time since 1980. We have Hot Sea Cool Throne, Mount Flushmore of Places to Be Drunk, and Guys on Chick. So a packed show for everyone. And we also have a very special announcement from the Cash App Friday night. Get ready because you got to get your bets in and your cash tags ready. Friday night, we've got free money coming to you. This Friday night, use the hashtag Cash App Derby for a special edition of Cat Cave Derby.

I've been running these toy horses every single night and Cash App is getting involved. They will be donating $10,000 to special charities designated to each horse. So each horse is going to get a charity. They will be supporting ALS Foundation is one of the charities, one of a charity that's very dear to me, ASPCA, Feeding America, and then the Anthony Rizzo Family Foundation, friend of ours is doing great work in the Chicago area. So we're going to do a Cash App Derby on Friday night, the Cat Cave Derby. Get your Cash App ready because we're also dishing out cash to the AWLs.

All you have to do is pick the exacta that's who will finish first and second for Friday night's race and will randomly select some winners and bless your Cash App accounts. So tweet using the Cash App Derby hashtag. That's the Cash App Derby hashtag, picking the winning exacta bet and win some money and we're going to support some great charities that will be this Friday night. So get ready with your Cash Tag, get ready with the hashtag Cash App Derby and get involved with the Cash App. And we're going to do some great things on Friday night.

Okay, let's go. Welcome to part of my take presented by the Cash App. I just announced the Cash App Derby is coming Friday night live from my apartment. So got to get involved. We're giving away free money corresponding with each horse to a great charity cause. And we're also giving away money to the AWLs for finishing correct exactas. So you got to get that ready. We're giving away free money on Friday night with the Cat Cave Derby.

Today is Wednesday, April 15th. Oh, Tax Day. Oh, wait. Oh, not so fast. My friend. Holy shit. It's Tax Day, boys. Do we know when Tax Day is?

I think June 15th. Oh, they only pushed it back two months. I'm on the October plan. Yeah, I'm going to need. It's Stim Check Day. Yeah. Oh, are you getting the Stim? I bet away my Stim Check Plan Call of Duty, so I already kind of lost it, but.

Got it. You bet $1,500. $1,200. Someone was like, I'll bet you your Stim Check. You won't get more than two kills. And I was like, that's easy. And then you didn't. And then I didn't.

So, well, that's stimulating the economy. Yeah. We have to get back to normalcy again. And that's gambling on video games that he's not very good at. Dude, how about this? It's Tax Day and we don't have to do our fucking taxes. Well, hell yeah. What am I like?

We're living large. Are they also pushing back the October extension date? Hopefully. Hopefully. Hopefully never activate taxes again. It should be six months, so therefore December, or December 15th, should be our tax day. With the amount of shrewt bucks that are going around the world right now, I feel like, you know, it's kind of a live and let live society.

Another good thing about today, we just got a glimpse into the future of sports. Sports is being scheduled again. Yes. The PGA Tour just announced a second ago. Oh, they're talking about the Cat Cave Derby. No, there's a Cat Cave Derby. But also, that's all we have left. The PGA Tour said that they're going to start playing their events with no fans in, what,

June? June. Yeah, so starting in June, they're just going to have these tournaments going. Oh my God. So sports is coming back. It's not a moment too soon because I saw, did you see that like the last couple of days online, various content farm websites, not to name names, but Bleacher Report, are putting together brackets.

We're doing brackets in April right now. That's like the last resort. It's brackets. It's brackets in the pick three. The pick three challenge is I want my eyes to play. But you can't do a bracket. You can't start new brackets in April. Yeah.

March is bracket season. We're listening. You're burning through your content so fast. You mentioned Dwight Shrook. This is like that episode in the office where Dwight Shrook gets stuck in the elevator and within 30 seconds establishes a peak order. Yeah. We're like a month into no sports.

You can't be busting out the big guns. People are losing their minds, but that's good. So we have sports coming back. We don't have to pay our taxes. Listen, this is good. This is the most positive PMT start that we've had in a month. We're feeling good. And then PFT, you had a great idea.

We're going to do a let's imagine what the first event, if we could pick any event to come back to, what would we pick? Just to do a little thought bubble, everyone should reply to us with what they want. This is just us. It's like, let's think about sports. It's the power of positive thinking. Yes. So in this thought experiment, what we're doing is we're not saying like, oh, the Super

Bowl and it has to be in February. Right. I'm saying like, if it were to be hypothetically May 1st, so you'd have a couple of weeks to look forward to it, but it could be any event. It could be like any game, any league, any sport. What game would you want to be that first one back to pop that cherry? What would you want? Well, are we talking crowds or no crowds?

No. Just pretend. Let's just pretend for a second that it's all the crowd. It's normal. Yeah. It's totally normal. Close your eyes and like, boom, you get to watch this game. I mean, Tampa against New England would be pretty sick in the snow or no snow.

Snow in Tampa. I like that. Snow in Tampa, Brady and Gronk against New England. Well, Kogan, Raleigh, Towel, wait, Gronk, Gronk's on the, the box. Yeah. Yeah. Because by then, by May 1st, he will be on the box. Interesting.

I've found it interesting that that hasn't been confirmed yet. The draft's still a week and a half away. And by the way, it's confirmed. It's happening. Oh, it's confirmed. Malcolm Butler? This is just me being overconfident to get back at Hank right now. I think it's going to happen still.

I'm still at like 85, 90 percent. So I'm in the boat of I like missed the March Madness so, so dearly that I would love. I thought at first I was like, how about like a good old fashioned iron bowl? Like Alabama Auburn just fucking let it go crazy because that's also probably where sports will come back first is states where they're like, who cares? Just Alabama. Yeah. Right.

I'm going to pick the finalists here and I'm probably going to piss off a lot of people. But I would love to see the conclusion to March Madness and I'll throw it out there. A repeat of the Maui invitation. I'd like to see Kansas play Dayton first game back national championship. Got all the storylines. Kansas is a juggernaut. Dayton OB Toppin ain't no stopping. Shout out Dayton.

I'm sure the Dayton Flyer fans had had a real renaissance this year where they like were aggressively say something nice about Dayton. So there it is. If you close your eyes right now and just imagine a marching band, a school marching band playing inside. That's like having the pomp and circuit like an NFL game back would be great. But having the pomp and circumstance of a college game and hearing even dude, give me Oklahoma putting up 80 against like UCLA and let me hear the fucking song over and over

and over. My backup was Oklahoma, Oklahoma State. Yeah. Give me 90 points. I think if it was going to be one event that's like kicking off sports, being back a star studded WrestleMania where it's like this is the event tonight. You have all the celebrity cameos. You're going to have all the athletes like all the crowd.

And then it's like starting after tonight sports are back on. It would be the most electric event of all time. That'd be good. People would be going nuts. Also, Niners at Seahawks, because you could have each players, you could have players from each league like make cameos, like it'd be a constant like we're back bitches like wet Pete Carroll, chewing his gum at night. God damn, that'd be so nice.

So nice. I want to see a crushing loss for the Cowboys in Jerry World. Just a shitload of screenshots of him being disappointed in the box, throwing stuff at his son. Yeah. Yankees, Red Sox, baseball, get Fauci to throw out the first pitch. Fauci wants baseball back. Yeah, he does.

Yeah. So we're going to get baseball back. I think baseball is going to come back. I really do. It's going to come down for like the Frankenstein version of baseball for one year only. It's been like, fuck it. We're all going to play in weird leagues and we don't care because this will be a year that we all just are like, what happened?

No fans. All right. No. Only fans admitted are ones who could recognize Mike Trout of the Mall. Yeah. So no fans. Pick him out of the lineup. So no.

No fans. His family would be allowed to go. All right. So we got sports news. We got visualization of sports coming back. We also had defenders, vipers. We'll pay back him. No.

Yeah. We also have sports news with Christian McCaffrey getting paid and people debating whether you should pay a running back or not. I still don't think you should. Yeah. The answer is no. But Christian McCaffrey is the classic, well, look at how much receiving he does. And it's like the old, you keep looking for a unicorn when all you need is a horse.

Like you keep trying to find a way to make Christian McCaffrey, no, it's an old saying. I fucking love that. Yeah. Keep looking for a unicorn. All you need is that horse and people are like saying, I think Christian McCaffrey, the stat that is most quoted is he's the first ever to, in his first three years, have 2,500 yards rushing, 2,500 yards receiving. Incredible.

But tell me when paying a running back is worth it. It's never worth it. But I mean, good for Christian McCaffrey getting paid. Yes. This is not a knock against him. No, not a knock at all against him. But it's like, yeah, if there were a running back out there, I'd pay the McCaffrey, Camara, Derek Henry, probably.

Yeah. But then Derek Henry would probably slow it. The thing about paying a running, it sounds like a good idea at the time. And if you're a new head coach, this is such a new head coach move. Yes. To come in and be like, okay. This is the franchise. I'm going to anoint the face of the franchise and be like, this is my guy.

We're moving on from Cam. We're going to Christian McCaffrey. It's like ordering shots of Yeagermeister. Well. It sounds good. And then later on, it's like having sex raw dog. It's good in the moment. Nine months later, you're like, fuck, I definitely shouldn't have done that.

The Christian McCaffrey, like he is the one running back who you can look at and be like, okay, maybe. But if you had to do gun to your head at the end of this deal, will you think like that was something that we definitely would have done again? I would say no. Probably not. Right. But was he going to hold out?

No. He had still two years left on his deal. So they did like an extension off. It's a, it's a just like to show you respect move, which those never, and again, again, if you, if you want to talk about like the perfect time that you would actually pay a running back, it is right before he's, he's not even 24 years old. He was, he's a good receiver and running back. He does everything.

He's dynamic. But even with all of that, like that's, that's the part about this whole entire deal is like Christian McCaffrey should be the guy that signs the wealthiest running back contract and everyone be like, great deal, but you're still in the back of your head. You're like, but running backs are not what they used to be. Yeah. No, I agree 100%. Matt rule will figure that out pretty quickly.

Yeah. He's going to never. Definitely big contract that Matt rule ever hands out to running back. Yes. Yes. All right. Speaking of football, should we do our, we've been doing the top 100 list. We've been breaking down every position.

We've been dissecting their list. Let's do court. We're doing quarterbacks today. And I threw it out to the group a couple hours ago that looking at the quarterback list, there's not a lot of mistakes here. If we do the same thing we've been doing where it's like the old guys don't touch them. So we're going to do two things. We're going to talk about the list.

So the list is as such, Joe Montana. So these are actually, let me do the old guys first, Johnny, United's Otto Graham, Sammy ball, Roger Stalback, crazy stat about Sammy ball that not many people realize in one year he led the league. I think it was in touchdowns, interceptions and punting. I love it. I love it. He did it all.

So those are the old guys. So we're not touching them. Then the new guys are Joe Montana, Tom Brady, John L. Way, Peyton Manning, Brett Favre, Dan Marino. Looking at this list, I have no issue with it. Nope. If you have to do the old guys, I have no issue with it. So what I said was we should do our top 10 quarterbacks, rank them from 1980 on.

And that's what we're going to do. Let's do it. So start to base. This could get contentious. Hank, would you like to start with your top 10? I would love to. Okay. Just rattle them off.

Yeah. In order, top 10. And then we'll figure out where we disagree. I think we'll agree on a few things. This is my personal list. Well, it's all of our personal. Correct. Actually, my list is CDC approved.

My number one, Tom Brady, no, I mean, no debate there. Do you have Tom? Actually, let's do it this way. Let's go. Let's go around. Like your ones. Does everyone have Tom Brady one? I did have Tom Brady.

I have Tom Brady. One as well. Mo Lewis. One. Tom Brady is one. Joe Montana. Two. I have Joe Montana.

Two also. Blake Bortles. Number three. Okay. Come on. Do it for real. How many years? We're going to get to this with Perk later, but is this the best or the greatest?

This is the greatest. This is like how I feel. If I'm thinking, I was right on my brain and I was like, what quarterbacks are the greatest? Okay. All right. All right. All right. So I disagree on three.

Let's do it piece by piece. So we'll disagree. So I have Peyton Manning as my thing. I also had Peyton Manning. Okay. So PFT and I have the same list so far. Drew Brees. I do not have Drew Brees as my number four.

I did not have that. The thing with Dan Marino and Steve Young, I have them on here, but I just didn't see them. So it's tough. I don't want to be like, yeah, like you got to put them on the list when it's like, I've literally never watched them play a game. Okay. Most people only know them from their appearances apart in my take.

Dan Marino would not be on this with Blake Bortles and Jared Goff would be one and two. Baker Mayfield, Jared Goff. What is your four, PFT? Aaron Rodgers. What? Aaron Rodgers. Aaron Rodgers is four? Yes.

Aaron Rodgers is, yes. Have you ever watched him play? Yes. Would he skip? No. No. Four. Yes.

God. No. No. His career is not over. And he's like, no. I mean, that's the, I've got several players whose career. Well, I have a couple of them. I have number four.

I have Dan Marino. But Aaron Rodgers is the best quarterback that I've ever seen in terms of like the throws he can make, everything that he can do now granted the last couple of years, not as great, but in his prime, like those four, five, six years, he, the Packers were never out of a game. It didn't matter who was playing why they see your form. They didn't have a running back. Basically.

How about Dan Marino? He's a defense. He, Dan Marino, I, I'm giving, I'm giving Dan Marino his, I was looking at it and I don't have Aaron Rodgers till number seven. But so, I mean, I, I have my list, but Dan Marino deserves more credit than he gets. I know we all make the jokes, but he was fucking insane. So you and I flip flop because I had Marino seven. Okay.

So Dan Marino had five years where I'll look up Aaron Rodgers, Dan Marino had five years where he was led the league in, in passing. He also, Dan Marino was like Patrick Mahomes, before Patrick Mahomes, when you're talking about his second year in the league, when he had 48 touchdowns in an NFL 1984, he had 48 touchdowns in 5,000 yards, which is fucking ridiculous. And I also, so who's your number five, I've actually wondered this about Dan Marino. Maybe you can help me out because to me, he doesn't have any signature moments or games where I think that year, I think

that's the Dan Marino game with Aaron Rodgers. They're probably about to fake spike, fake spike. There you go. Okay. So thank you for helping me out with that spike. Yeah. So Aaron Rodgers has never led the league in passing. He's never led the league in passing.

He, I mean, he has an insane TD to interception ratio. I'll give you that. And he led the league in touchdowns once. Dan Marino was a league in passing five times and touchdowns three times. I mean, his so Dan Marino's 1984 season, when they went 14 and two, he had 48 touchdowns, 5,000 yards. And this is in the NFL, that obviously is not what the NFL is today. And 64 percent completion percentage.

He was Patrick Malm's. He was very good. I'm not trying to take away from Dan Marino as a player. I just think they Aaron Rodgers, from what I've seen from him, probably like the most impressive arm talent on this list, but then he should win more. They do win a lot. He should have one of the playoffs. He should win more.

If I mean, wait, wait, wait. If you're saying he should win more, I'm pretty sure his record over his career. What's what's his win percentage compared to Dan Marino? It's like, you can't not Aaron Rodgers not winning. No, I'm just saying that he then have Dan Marino. He's the most impressive guy. Like I think at some point you also have to like back it up with winning a shitload to I mean, they have won a shitload and they won one Super Bowl, but they've won a lot.

OK, I listen, I've been Rodgers on my list. I just think Dan Marino, especially like his numbers, when you look at him throughout his entire career is fucking insane. All right, Hank, who you got next? My number five, Brett Favre. OK, I got no problem with that. I have Elway at five. I also had Elway at five. So the one thing with Elway, which is kind of more to my Dan Marino point in,

like, and I guess it would be Darren Rodgers that, you know, if you have a better defense. But Elway, the crazy thing about Elway's career, he went to three Super Bowls before he won one and he was basically like carrying that team. Then at the end of his career, he gets an all time running back and a good defense and they win two Super Bowls and the history of Elway is written completely different. So I looked at it. He went his first 15 playoff performances. He had 11 11 out of 15.

He threw for over 225 yards, his last seven playoff games, which were the two Super Bowl runs. He threw over 225 yards one time. So it's like he, you know, like if Dan Marino had the ability of having a defense in Terrell Davis at the end of his career, it could be totally different. Do you think that Dan Marino or excuse me, do you think that John Elway would have drafted John Elway?

Because I don't think that he would. Well, he was only six three. He said he's going to go play for the Yankees. Two hundred fifteen. Yeah. Yeah. So that red flag in John Elway's eyes. I think that also, like in those Super Bowls, John Elway, his defense was dog shit in a couple of them. I think the Redskins get up 28 in the second quarter.

No, absolutely. And so it's not on him that they lost those Super Bowls. That's what I'm saying. John Elway was an awesome quarterback. If you ever saw him scramble, he's like maybe some people out there have seen more of Steve Young than of John Elway. But John Elway was a better Steve Young before Steve Young was in the, you know, that that's kind of my point, though, is that like John Elway

and Dan Marino kind of had the same. I mean, obviously, Dan Marino only went to one Super Bowl, but they had similar careers up until John Elway. Like if it's just such a hard thing to judge quarterbacks when you throw it like everything in there and you're like, oh, yeah, the defense obviously matters a lot. And like, you know, you could play that game with anyone. You could play it with Peyton Manning if he had a better defense

or you could play it the reverse way. Like if Rex Grossman didn't, you know, fumble the ball and the Broncos didn't have an unbelievable defense, could he have zero? So it's a what if sliding door game. All right, number six. Real quick, I had one more thing with John Elway. So the drive. So he had he engineered the drive.

We've got the drive. We've got the catch. We've got the fumble. How many more different plays have yet to be named? Like really, really simply like that. Has there been like the interception? The kick. The kick. We don't have a the kick yet, dude. We have the kick six. Got kicked.

Albin Auburn. We got the double. We get we don't have the kick yet. No, no, no, no. I was thinking of the kicking game. Yeah. The punt. We don't have the punt. Do we have the punt return? Oh, yeah. The Sean Jackson. Yeah, that's the punt return. Yeah. Yeah. OK. The kick return might be Hester, actually.

Yeah. Yeah. You're right to start the Super Bowl. That's pretty crazy. I mean, I think you probably have to win the Super Bowl to have that be cemented. We've got the tackle against the Rams, the Titans, Rams Super Bowl. Yep. Yep. All right. Hank, your number six. Big Ben Rothesberger. Oh, OK. OK. I don't like that one. It's a crazy one. OK.

Also, his career is not done. Is. Yeah. The story is not been. I think Rothesberger has the worst QB, QBR for a Super Bowl winning quarterback. He also has twice as many Super Bowls as Aaron Rodgers. Yeah, that's true. That's also true. I was about to do it, but I was like, but we did our prime numbers on Monday. But in that in that first Super Bowl that he got, he really didn't do.

No, that's what I'm saying. He I'll actually look it up. It's it's a very funny. It's it's another it's another case where it's hard to judge. So people say the same thing about Brady for his first one. Well, no, it's that's this is the John Elway thing. John Elway's best years were not his Super Bowl years. Like it was he was very old at the end of that. He was still a very good quarterback, but it wasn't those weren't

and got carried to his second one, too. But, but, Hank, imagine if Tom Brady won that first Super Bowl, then one another Super Bowl six years later and nothing after that. Would you put him on this list? No. Yeah. OK. I got to I got to find this game. Well, but Ben Rothesberger also ran into a buzz saw. Like you can't if you're playing the Patriots.

Oh, because it's not. I like that. I was smart to put him there then. Yeah, that was good. Yeah. Yeah. You should have put him number two overall, actually. Yeah, you would be number one if it weren't for the Patriots. Notice that Hank does not have Peyton Manning on his list yet. All right. So you have you have Ben Rothes or Ben Rothesberger is your six.

I have farve. OK. I have one, two, three, four, five. I have farve also. OK. So we we have different right now is Rodgers and Marino. Yes. OK. Hank, you're seven. You're a breath of winning three MVPs in a row is pretty crazy. It is sick. And also like he's just like you think quarterback.

He's the gun. Quick on in the even though he did throw like 300 plus interceptions, which I'll happily point out. That's part of the reason he's on this list is because he threw all those interceptions and was still awesome and was probably the most fun quarterback to watch. Ben Rothesberger in that Super Bowl when it gets to Seahawks nine for twenty one, one hundred twenty three yards, two interceptions. That's awesome.

And the refs gave it to him to death. Dan Marino's got to watch that and be like, what the fuck? Yeah. I mean, honestly, the refs should have been the offense. Yes. Yes. All right. Your number seven, Marino. OK. PFT, you have Marino seven. I have Rodgers is my seven. OK. Eight. It's kind of crazy that the Packers have two top ten quarterbacks all time

and they only have two Super Bowls show for it. Just as wild. Eight. Steve Young. OK. Interesting. What's your I've got to breathe. Same. So so PFT and I pretty much have the same list, except for the Marino Rogers. I think we're going to disagree with the next couple. OK. Number nine, Aaron Rodgers. OK. Number nine. Number nine, Russell Wilson. Whoa. OK.

Number nine, I have Steve Young. OK. All right. And my number ten Pat Mahomes. Same with me. Same with me. Yeah. So we all had Patrick Mahomes. Was was anybody else's eleven Troy Aigman? Eleven. I had Troy Aigman somewhere. He was somewhere around the list. Yeah, I had him thrown around. So wait, did you not have Steve Young? I did not have Steve Young. OK.

So you don't have eleven is Steve Young. No. Wow. Wait, so you which one of mine did you not have on the list? I don't have Russell. You don't have Russell Wilson on the list. OK. I don't have Russell. What about if we were just to as a as a unit together, the most fun quarterbacks to watch? Mike Vick would be number one. I'd have far of one. Vick to James is making a late push, but there's not enough tape of James is pretty fun.

James is pretty Philip Rivers. Phil Rivers is definitely up there for fun quarterbacks. Trying to think of who else. I mean, Manning was pretty fun when he was calling his own plays and just like spouting a bunch of. Matt Schaub. Matt Schaub was great. That was very fun. I mean, Rex Grossman.

Yeah, I mean, he's just throw deep and just hope it works. Three that one year. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, Lamar Jackson, you could throw on the fun list. But all right, so we didn't disagree that much. I guess we should we should put these in a. We should put these in a like quote board, Liam Bubba, and we'll we'll put it out there because I'm sure people will discuss. It's a good way to get people to discuss just debate

quarterbacks in the middle of the quarantine. But either way, I think they did a good job. So you you think that NFL 100 list, you actually have a problem with it because Aaron Rodgers should be on there instead of Dan Marino. Yes. OK, that's the one change that I would. OK, all right. And then and then where would you rank?

If we went to 100, would you get Peyton Manning in there? He's probably top 20. He's he's squeaking at the end. Where's Eli? Not on the list. OK. Highest paid quarterback of all time. I mean, he beat Tom Brady twice in Super Bowls. You shine. Yeah. You should have him number one, actually,

because he's so good that he beat the best quarterback twice. Now, that's more of like a clock is always right. It broke the clock is right twice a day type of thing. There we go. There we go. I also feel like they included Dan Marino on this list because they have to be nice to him. I just feel like you know, you have to be like Dan Marino. You were great to remind people that he was going to find a Dan Marino

highlight tape and I'm going to tweet it out because Dan Marino was fucking filthy. And unfortunately, his career didn't go the same way. He also had the unfortunate ending of the worst playoff performance, I think, ever for his last game. So that's also a problem is that like people remember Dan Marino, like people in their probably early 30s, even our age, probably remember like their their one big memory of Dan Marino

is his last playoff game against Jaguars. I'm going to pull it up. It's actually like the saddest thing to watch, too, because he was Dan Marino was one of those guys where, like, once his legs went, it was just kind of like it was tough to watch. He bounced back nicely, though, in Ace Ventura. So he won, actually, his second or last game against the Seahawks in the playoffs.

His last game against the Jacksonville Jaguars, the Miami Dolphins lost 62 to seven and he went 11 for 25 with two interceptions. That's it's sad. That's a sad way to go out. So and like I said, like if he has, I don't know, if you if luck goes a different way for him and he has, you know, an awesome defense and a great running back at the end of his career, who knows?

All right, let's do our hot seat cool throne. Then we'll get to Kendrick Perkins great interview with Perk before we do hot seat cool throne. We are brought to you by Bud Light Seltzer. Bud Light Seltzer reminds you that cool throne until further notice is staying safe and staying at home. Order Bud Light Seltzer direct to your door through drizzly and get five dollars off for first time users by using code PMT at checkout.

Some restrictions apply. Do it again. Bud Light Seltzer reminds you that cool throne until further notice is staying safe and staying at home. Order Bud Light Seltzer direct to your door through drizzly and get five dollars off for first time users by using code PMT at checkout. By the way, I don't want to give you more ammunition, PFT, but if you wanted to for the Aaron Rodgers argument,

you could say he also sat for four years. That's very true. I don't want to. I'm not going to. I was about to say, but I felt like I was a good person, like would say that just to even help his nemesis in Aaron Rodgers. I felt like I was embarrassing you with all my facts. So yeah, right, right. Thanks for you saying it. All the facts about how many times he led the the league in passing,

which were zero. Well, he had a lot of leads. Five. That's what happens when you have a lot of leaves. You don't need to throw the ball in a fucking NFL that was very different. All right. Hot seat, cool throne, Hank, go on. My hot seat is coach Dugs and you big cat. What? Why? More sliders. No, sliders are gone. Sliders are gone.

But I just feel like the tension has been building and you haven't got a loss out yet on the Twitch stream, but you're playing in the championship tonight. So it's just I feel like you're on the hot seat. ACC Championship. And if you don't get this victory. Yeah, ACC Championship game on the Pardon My Take Twitch channel at 10 p.m. Eastern. I the haters, it's very funny watching the haters leave

whenever I get a lead and then watching it grow when it's like a close game. But the haters, I feel like we have the Twitch haters are like young kids and they don't understand PFT is actually a master in this that for to get maximum suicidal big cat, you need to let me win early and lose late. If you had lost like your second or third game, right? That's no fun. You're just like, OK, well, that kind of sucked. That was fun for a little bit.

But once you really get your hopes up, right, it's when it's great to pull the carpet out from under. Right. So they they're not thinking long term. What are the haters saying in the chat? They just do F a lot, which I guess, Hank, you were wrong about what? Yeah. Well, I had you on my hot seat, but you can address it right now. So yeah, I mean, I was just saying it's funny when it happens

because it is fucking hilarious like when big cat throws an interception and it's just flooded with apps. All I was saying was it was very funny. I didn't realize like it was a thing on Twitch. Apparently, it goes back to an old Call of Duty game where in the campaign mode, someone died and on like the screen it popped up. It said press F to pay respects. So the whole thing is kind of like making fun of that original Call of Duty

thing, which was like meant to be dead serious. Like you're paying you're pressing F to pay respects for. It was it was part of gameplay where you're at the funeral of a fellow Navy SEAL or whatever, and you're at the casket and says press F. I this might be like a Berenstein Bears thing where my mind is wrong about a memory that it thinks that it had. I always thought it was press X to pay respects. That's why I didn't think that you were wrong when you said that.

No, it's F, I guess someone show me the screenshot. The yeah. So so ACC Championship game tonight in the they're calling me fraud state university. They're they make fun of me because I only run like four plays, but they made me take off the slider. So I can't like I just run the ball. Yeah, just stop it.

If there's nothing I can do if you have a problem with it. I'm scared to throw. And I just throw interceptions through like four picks the other night. So you're cool. Throne, my cool throne is just like sports radio hosts and mending relationships. Colin Coward, Wish Baker Mayfield. Happy birthday on Twitter today. Oh, shit.

We forgot to wish my birthday. Can you do it from the PMT account real quick? Sure. What should I just copy exactly what Colin Coward wrote? Yeah, but make one word like a lot nicer. Yeah. Well, he said happy. Oh, wait, that's my account. Never done that before.

Happy happy birthday, Baker Mayfield. Party. Wait, what? There's no way that he was just nice about it. Happy birthday, Baker Mayfield. Big year ahead. No, that's all I said. Huge year ahead. What should I say?

Huge year. Yeah. Happy big. Yeah. And then PFT, I didn't even ask you further. I was waiting for the show, but you just mentioned earlier like, hey, did you guys see Skip and Steve and a like flirting with each other? Yeah. What what is that about? So they're making eyes from across the room at each other.

Somebody. Well, Skip Bayless started this out by just saying Favre, greater than sign, greater than sign, greater than. So probably about 30 or 40 greater than signs. And then Rogers debating up next at undisputed. And or is it undisputed? What's the name of their stupid show? Whatever. OK.

Whatever they interrupted. Yeah. So so Skip Bayless was just going out there casually in the middle of April, dropping Favre is greater than Rogers takes. Yeah. Which you would probably agree with based on your list. Yes, I do agree with that. And then somebody tagged Stephen A. Smith in it and said something like, is this man drunk or high or both?

And Stephen A. Smith quote tweeted and said, Lord. So Stephen A. Smith is aware of of Skip's takes and that Lord is doing a lot of work there because it's a Lordy hidden behind. It's his version of being horny, which is like I'm sick of debating against Max Kellerman, because Max Kellerman doesn't throw this type of red meat at me. That gets me going.

Yeah. So I actually had I had that on my hot seat. Max was going to be on my hot seat. That works. So I think, you know, it's been our theory on the show that Skip and Stephen A. Smith will eventually get back together. I agree. They miss each other because Max is not the worthy foe. And if you're a kid out there that never got to see those two guys debate each

other, man, you it's two titans of industry going at it. Yes. It was must see TV. Yes. And it's going to be it's going to have to be Skip going back to ESPN. That's the problem. Yeah, that's true. I don't think Stephen A. is going anywhere. You have to throw the bag at Skip. Yeah. I immediately asked him to take a 15 percent pay cut.

Skip living in New York City. Oh, my God, I would love that. Shit. All right. What's your cool throne? So my cool throne is the alpha males who go back through someone's tweet history the night before the draft and dig up old tweets because you guys, it's your time to shine. Very cool. I actually think there's nothing

lamer than plotting ahead and trying to fuck up the biggest night of somebody's life because they had some weird tweets. Like I think it was a couple of years ago, the Eagles drafted somebody and they had said like Philadelphia sucks and is filled with F word or something like that back like seriously nine years ago or six years ago, something like that. If you're not, if you're a 13 and you're not tweeting out crazy stuff, you're not taking off chances. And that to me is even more of red flag.

Oh, then get a cow hand. Well, within reason, no one's going to his party. Within reason, as long as it's not like racial, homophobic, sexist type stuff. But like, I think it was D Anthony Thomas had a lot of cool shit that people tried to nail him on that. I love kissing titties. I love kissing. Exactly. That's a great one. They tried to get Mitch on that one. Yeah, exactly.

But it's going to happen and it's going to suck when it happens. Yes. It's going to be awkward for everybody. So in advance, I'm putting one in your earhole. OK. My hot seat is Dave Gettleman's senses. So I don't know if you saw Dave Gettleman was bemoaning these virtual visits that he has to do. Probably just because he has to get in front of a computer. But he said, obviously, when we would go to workouts a lot of times

the night before our coach and scout that would be at the pro day would take one, two or three of the players out to dinner and have some conversation that way. We're losing the personal touch points. We have the visual touch point, but we're really missing out on the personal touch point when you can smell or feel a guy. Smelling and feeling. So poor poor Dave Gettleman's senses don't have any smelling or feeling about tasting a guy. Yeah.

Why not? I think we've got to embrace debate. Sorry to interrupt, but Skip just tweeted a program alert about tomorrow's undisputed, which is the name of the show interrupted. Yeah. Shannon and me at 9 30 as we debate what we believe and don't believe about the size of Friday Night Gathering at Dax home. Oh, it was debate. Jesus, what was the size of the gather? There needs to be a full cereal done on that on that party that they had.

Damn, I think it was my over under is 15 and a half. I don't believe it over. I think it was about 20 25 under 10. No way. Well, I think I think what he means by that's under 10 cowboys. Yeah. And then probably two or under 10 chicks. Yeah. Well, no, under 10 dudes. And then like probably two chicks for every dude that. Yeah. Yeah. All right.

My cool throne is the Niners because they save lives by not winning the Super Bowl. That was a report that came out. I used obviously the spins on the bears saved all the lives by not drafting the homes because it was funny. They're like the Niners deserve or save lives by not winning a Super Bowl. Alternate headline is Patrick Mahomes is so fucking good that he's can save lives in other cities. But you're saying that the bears not drafting Patrick Mahomes did

the ultimate sacrifice because Chicago so much never celebrate. Never celebrate anything ever put up a tear down the Jordan statue because he probably endangered more lives in the flu game. It's Mitch tear that down. It's Mitch put up a statue of Mitch and Cody. Yeah. And then my other cool throne is we have is us because we're not going to. I think we're not going to do the bike ride on this Friday. We're going to do it all Friday.

We got to do it a Friday when it's not raining in 40 degrees. There's a weather alert. Yeah. We can't be unsafe. I don't mind football weather going out there in 40 degrees. But when you add in the rain to that 30 miles on a tandem, there's a pandemic. I don't know if you looked around. There's a pandemic. We don't need to go out there and compromise our immune system

when we're under attack. That's true. So we're doing with the CDC. Dr. Fauci, our personal friend, has said so all Friday we're going to be doing it. Probably next Friday. If the weather is nicer. So yeah, 40 degrees and the rain. That's a little bit too except you'd probably be wanting me to be in the front if it was raining to absorb some of the rain.

Yeah. But then you would like flip your hair and then with me with it. I would do that. I would my hair back and forth. Yeah. Right. So we're going to do it, though. We're going to do it. Guarantee. Let's get to Kendrick Perkins. Real quick. Yeah. With your Dave Gettleman thing. Yeah. Did you see the picture of him that came out of him pretending that he was at a computer? No, it was like him at a desk where a computer definitely usually isn't and he's just staring at us

that he can take a picture of him. Call out the A-Rod. Yeah. Being like, look at him. He's working. He's adapting to these times. He's absolutely not adapting. And I saw that the NFL draft was going to be conducted. We all we already knew that it was going to be a virtual draft. Then they added in the wrinkle that because there are so many GMs

that are technically technologically illiterate, there would also be a conference call that would be open at the time that you could just yell out what your pick was if you couldn't get it in in the correct methods. I will pay $5,000 to get access to that conference call on draft night. OK. Out of my own pocket. Wow. If I can get access where and I'm not talking about like just the open line that I can listen to.

We want to be able to talk. I want to be able to make fake draft picks. Yeah. For the New York football. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'll split that with you. OK. You don't have to do it all. $2,500. I'm going to say $5,000. I'm going to do $2,500 and Big Cat's going to match it. Yes. There we go.

We're going to matching in Hank. You're going to match. I don't know. You already give away your Trump box. All right. Let's go to Kendrick Perkins. PFT. You got that. Yes. Before we get to Kendrick, I want to talk to you about our very, very good friends at Mugsy Jeans. They are literally the only jeans that we wear because they look like jeans, but they feel like sweatpants.

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One of my favorite reply guys out there at Kendrick Perkins. It is Kendrick Perkins. Perk, thank you for joining us. We appreciate it. I got to start before we talk basketball. I got to ask the most important question. Quarantine, how much was the final bill that your son racked up on your credit card for fortnight?

Because I saw that story that he he he put $16,000 on your credit card bill. Is the is it still climbing or what's going on in the Perk House? Man, because first of all, I appreciate y'all having me on. You know, we way past due for this for this for having me on y'all show. And I want to I want to thank y'all for having me on. I love what y'all doing with the show. It's a fantastic show. And I just want to thank y'all.

But listen, these kids are driving me crazy. Not only I mean, you know, they ran up my credit card field. So what I did now is I took my credit card number off their cell phone. So I made their own our clouds on our town account. So what they have now is they have they have prepaid credit cards. So now they have to come ask me to put money on their cards. But they can't get on to the thing is they can't get on. Now they've made it worse for themselves

because they can't get on video games during the week. They only allow to get on video games during the weekend. And the max that they could spend on the video games now is ten dollars. And that's for the weekend. That's nothing. But I mean, it's smart for you to put them on an expense account. But what you should have done is you should have just gone out there and made like eighteen thousand dollars worth of purchases

on a fortnight for yourself and then kicked their asses in it. Right. Hey, I don't know about it. That's what I thought about. But you know, you know what? I got my money back, though. Oh, you get my money back. Because yeah, because it's a rule that if you're not over 16 years old,

then it's some type of rule that, you know, you can get your money back. So I got every dollar bank. I just use those charges. OK, nice. All right. So that's a good resolution. I had to ask that first because I feel like that is the most pressing issue is the fortnight purchases in the in the Perkins household while everyone's shelter in place.

Yes, God bless me. It was crazy. I want to get this right off the jump real quick. You did say that you're overdue for coming on the show. We would try to get you on here for like six, eight months, something like that. You are probably our producer. Hanks, like probably top four favorite basketball player of all time. And he says that he's been hounding you, but you've been ghosting him.

Would you like to address those allegations that Hank has made towards you? Yes, I do. I don't think I look like I appreciate you, you know, being a fan of my man. And I really appreciate you finally getting me on the show. But I only heard from Hank at least once or twice. He hasn't been hounding me for six to eight weeks. I'm not hard to find. Yeah, I think I think PFT exaggerated that he exaggerated that a little bit.

Well, you mentioned it on the show. So Hank usually happens because I wanted a favorite player. So he get a pass because I take the fault at this. But I've been anxious to get on the show, though. OK, all right. So you squashed the beef there. Hank, do you have your one question? We know Hank had a question.

Did you want to ask a question about finals? Or go ahead. I got a million questions, I guess. I mean, the one I told them to ask, but is how many fouls do you think you actually have committed in your career? Good question. I was thinking of technical fouls, because, you know, fouls. If the game ended and I had less than four fouls, I felt like I didn't do my job.

I like that. I like that. I think what Hank's getting to, though, is you. I don't think I've ever seen you put your hand up and say, that one's on me. Like when you get called for a foul. It's like, no, that wasn't really a foul. But then at the end of the game, you accept it. Yeah, but you know what?

You've got to debate it. Because, see, you've got to play the mind games with the referees because sometimes they'll let you get away with fouls. You know what I'm saying? So if you debate a few, then they'll let you get away with the ones that they were supposed to call. Because it was a few times that I was supposed to foul a lot the game, but since I argued so many calls,

they were like, oh, you know, I'm going to let this one ride. You know, they get tired of hitting your mouth. Yeah. You've got to play their mind games with them, Hank. That's brilliant. Yeah. I didn't think about it that way. So all right. So going off of that, because you were a physical player,

I'm always curious about, you know, players in different eras. And like we had like Joe Harris from the Nets in a couple of months ago. And it was right after he signed his deal and we're like, hey, like you realize if this was 20 years ago, you probably wouldn't have a spot in the NBA because the three point shot wasn't the way it is now. You were probably in the correct era that like if you came along

today, do you think that there would be a spot for you on an NBA roster in terms of like an old school center? No, not at all. I would probably be playing overseas. I'm glad. I'm glad I came along when I did because, you know, the game changed tremendously. Not only as a big, but hold on.

But let me tell you something. I got a lot of I got a lot of I got a complete package in my game. Doc Rivers just made me into a role player at an early age because we needed to win a championship. Right. Doc Rivers stopped me from Doc Rivers kind of stopped. I love Dr. Del, but he'll tell you, he stopped me from really being a four time all star because I had to buy into being a role player to win a championship.

But now now I see this now, I wouldn't have made it because, you know, the highest my vertical ever been was like 28 inches. And nowadays, if you're a center, you got to have a 40 inch bird. You got to be able to run the floor like a gazelle. And that's that's double than me. You know, I'm at my best speed. I may be a five to 40. So no way, no way.

I would have been able to keep up with the pace that these guys play with today. And, you know, but back in the day, yeah, that was my style. Physical, playing through elbow, playing through the elbows and low block area, you know, games to score 90 to 88 final. No running up and down here. You take a three. Now is my turn here.

You go score a layup. My turn score a hundred and seventy eight to one eighty. When the game in, I don't know, that wasn't me. I wasn't feeling too good. I appreciate that. And like thinking about it even more. I actually think that you timed your career perfectly because thinking about it even like if you were in the 90s,

you wouldn't have been paid what you were paid. Like you were actually the perfect time for your skill set to maximize the value that you got in the NBA. I agree 100 percent. You know what? And that's that's what every, you know, every agent tell their players the same thing. Unless you're a major star superstar, timing is everything. Timing is everything when it gets special.

When it comes down to sports and contracts and things like that, timing is everything. That's how some summers you see it. You see a guy get a hundred million. You like, oh, how did he get a hundred million? Yeah, because he came up at the right time. Yeah. Do you think that there's a chance that the league is going to kind of swing back at some point?

The pendulum is going to go back more to a game where a big center can just body people up and thrive or is it just going to keep being spread out like this for the for the foreseeable future? Well, you know, it's going to have, you know, it's going to have to happen. One, a team is going to have to win one or two championships during the traditional way with a big center. Two, there's going to have to be an upcoming young player. And I think I have him in my son, Kingston Perkins,

there's going to have to change the game. And he's going to be probably the next shack where he's going to have to force the game to go back to where it want to be. Because just think about it. The game really changed when Steph Curry came along. Steph Curry, go to say Warriors, they kind of changed the whole dynamic of of of centers and and powerful because, you know, they were the first team really to go extra small with a six, six,

Draymond Green as center and, you know, definitely shooting threes right as soon as they cross half court. So, you know, at the end of the day, I think it's going to take a team to win a championship the traditional way. And I think Greg Popovich, he tried to stick with it and but it's not working right now. So I think it might take another. Let me see Kingston eight.

Yeah, take another 10 years. So once I'm on Perkins, it'll get back to the north. I'm watching him right now. He's a beast. Is this is this the kid who spent $16,000 on Fortnite? No, it was both of them. I was with you. Oh, OK, OK, but both of them.

Yeah. So they was what happened was that they weren't just spending it on themselves. It's a group of them and they was buying their cousins, their friends. I mean, they were just I mean, they was having it their way. And I did not even know because, you know, I use a certain credit card, you know, and I because that's the way I'm able to keep up on my budget. But this particular day I was rushing out the house and it was nighttime and I actually was going to get me a pint of pint of cookies and cream ice cream.

Yeah. And I said, well, this is called right here. Let me grab this. I get to the store and she's like, it's the client. I'm like, what? I haven't touched this credit card. Like two weeks. So I call the people and they like is next out. First of all, my limit on my credit card is 15,000.

So they let them go over extra thousand dollars, which I didn't even tell anybody. So I'm like, I get 16,000. So I go back and look at the credit card statement. And it was for a night. It was it was video games. There's two hundred and sixty nine dollars, three hundred here, three hundred there. I'm like, what? It's a great excuse when you were when you're like Kingston,

why is my credit card bill being charged? Sixteen thousand dollars for fortnight. What was his reason for that? Well, you know what? I never had the conversation with him. So look, let me tell you, my wife, she is the fourth around the house, right? My wife is she. I mean, she she runs the tight ship around here.

She keeps all four of my kids in line. So she they went to school. This is right before they right before school was let out. So what we did was we went to the pawn shop and we weren't bought a play station. They had a play station in the old one for like 30 bucks. So we won't buy one. They look exactly like this and we threw it in the pool. And when I got home from school, when I got home from school,

we hit they we hit the one that they had because they was punished. When they got home from school, we made them go out there and look at it. And we left it in there for like a week. And every time they would go, they would literally break down in tears. Like no exaggeration. I'm talking about falling out in tears. And I was loving every second of that. So, so good. All right.

So let's talk a little basketball. What do you have any idea when it's coming back? I know you probably been asked this a million times. But do you have any idea when it's coming back? And if you were Kendrick Perkins still playing, would you be willing to go live in a biodome or a bubble to get the NBA season back? I'm depressed, right? I mean, you know, I need basketball.

Like why won't basketball back on? Like I want my grandma sweet potato pies. I can't have them. I'm going to die. That's how bad I want basketball. But at the end of the day, I thought I was like for a while, every day I was waking up, I was optimistic. Like, you know, man, we got the best commissioners in sports and Adam Silver. The NBA is going to find a way this corona virus is not going in.

But every day I kept waking up, I'm thinking tomorrow is going to be better than this night. So now I've come to the conclusion since we were about five weeks in. I'll come to the conclusion. I'm like, hold on, the corona virus is getting worse. People are dying. And now I honestly don't see the NBA coming back this season. It's going to be hard because guys are not able to work out right now. The only how you could get in basketball shape is playing basketball.

And you would have to have like two weeks of training camp, couple preseason games like you would have to do so much to prep guys up to be able to go out there and compete at a high level. Because just think we were heading to the into the playoffs. So guys were already peaking in, you know, they were in in a round form and playoff mode, their bodies were feeling great. They were ready. But, you know, if me personally.

After what happened last yesterday, the call after the time of mother God rest her soul, I couldn't see myself leaving my family right now to go and play in the isolated area or in the bubble. If the NBA call, I would just, you know, know it's because right now we got to look at what's more important. What's more important right now is your health, safety and your family. And as a man of the house, the provider, the protector is no way. I don't care, you know, my father-in-law here is a man of my house.

I can't leave my family during this time. Yeah, that makes sense. It does because as fans, you know, we want basketball back just as much. Like it's the one thing that we need. You know, we need sports. We miss sports just like you do. And we want sports to come back pretty much at any cost. But you have to take into account the fact that they're, you know,

they're human beings that have families. And while it might be fun to picture them play on a cruise ship. And we like to talk about these weird ways that maybe we could get sports back. At the end of the day, you have to remember that, you know, they are putting things in jeopardy by trying to do that for our entertainment. So I agree with you on that. I had a question here about Rudy Gobert. So this whole thing really the spark that set everything off

was when Rudy tested positive for coronavirus at that jazz game after he had touched all the microphones and joked around about and stuff. Do you see Rudy being welcomed back to any locker room? Like hypothetically, if JR Smith had done something like this, I just drew that name out of a hat randomly. But if you had a teammate that had kind of put you in a similar position, would that person be welcomed back into the locker room the next season? For sure. You got to. I mean, at the end of the day,

you know, he didn't know no better. And the thing about Rudy that I applaud him because I was pissed off at the thing that I applaud Rudy so much for is that he apologized several times. You know, maybe a hundred times, you know, he felt really bad. He donated a lot of money to the cause, but also on the flip side of it, Rudy, I mean, he did he did an immature act, but it also, you know, set the tone for the world like, hey, this is serious. Let's take note to this because after the incident,

then the NBA led the charge and shut down sports. And for a minute, it was a spiral thing. Everyone else was like, hold on, it's time to shut down the world. So at the end of the day, Rudy was kind of like a bad guy, but he was almost like a savior. And I wouldn't say it to that nature of Jesus Christ, but, you know, he possibly saved some lives by, you know, doing an immature act. So, I mean, it is some good that came out of it, but at the end of the day, it's not his fault because the NBA, we all been knowing about this coronavirus.

This was, you know, it's been brought to our attention much beforehand. And to me, I think us as not just the NBA, but the whole world dropped the ball on this and we didn't get ahead of this like we should have. Yeah. Rudy Gubarra's Jesus is an interesting analogy. Yeah. Rudy's a good defensive player. He doesn't get crossed up, but I do like the spin zone that he might be responsible for saving as many lives as anybody during this crisis because that 49ers, that did. Yeah.

Him and the 49ers and the Bears for not drafting the homes. Yes. Yeah. That that is an interesting spin. So I kind of like that. But Perk, I also think that the Perk that we knew three years ago would have come at Rudy a little bit harder and you seem like you're like a little kinder and gentler. Now you got some perspective on it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I didn't say I wouldn't have told him anything about it. I definitely would have had to speak my mind and tell him like, man, man, what the hell would you think? You know, I would have had to read him.

That's right. I'm still Perk now. I'm not soft, but I'm saying, eventually I would have got over it and we would have just had to rock it out. You know, he would have still been welcome, but he would have to hear my mouth for damn sure. Okay. All right. So going off of that, you're still Perk. Who are you beefing with right now on Twitter? Cause I feel like every time you look up, you got a new, you got a new person that you're beefing with. You know, here's the thing. I have time now since I'm retired.

When I'm not working, I have time. So if I tweet something, I check my mentions and if I see somebody say something to me that I don't like, then I'm going to say something back to them. So it's whoever wants to smoke cause I got time. Okay. They want the smoke I'm bringing to fire. Okay. All right. I like that perspective. Now, do you ever look back on your old Twitter beefs and you're like, what was I thinking? Like that was maybe not like when you said Mark Jackson

deserved more credit than Steve Kerr for the Warriors. Like that was a bad take. No, that was a great take. That was a great take. And that was what it was. It was facts and people, people just sometimes people just don't like the other truth. Mark Jackson built that coach over there. Mark Jackson is on record calling the splash brothers, the splash. He's on record talking noise saying, Hey, I got the best two shooters in the world. Try me. Try me. Right.

Steve Kerr just happened to stroke gold. Right. Then they went from the six seed to the NBA champions in the year after that winning 73 games. So that feels like that might've had something to do with Steve Kerr. They was destined to do that. They'll curve was on the rise. Clay Thompson was on the rise. They, they had to get David Lee out the way so that they could get Dremore into the starting lineup. Okay.

That wasn't on Mark Jackson. Mark Jackson didn't pay David Lee 50 plus million dollars. Okay. That's why I drove on one plan. All right. So, so you, I can't move your mind off that one. What about when you called Kevin Durant, a coward, a coward's move? Are you still on that one? Yeah. Do y'all disagree with that? Not necessarily. Yeah. Yeah. Probably not. So that's my thing.

But that's my thing. That's my thing. You know what? I shouldn't have said that, but it wasn't like I told a lie. I just said, I just, I just spoke, I just said what everyone else had been thinking anyone. Okay. Yeah. I mean, but, because think about it. If, if when you're considered a great just, okay, what if LeBron James would have went joined the 73 and 19? Yeah. No, I agree with you. I, so, so like what you said, I think a lot of

people were thinking and had said, what about like Kevin Durant, his response? He basically put you in a body bag. He toe clipped you. He put who in the body bag? Yeah. No, that's not true. That's, you said, Big Cat is misremembering. I'm reading it right here. You said, all right, Kendrick Perkins. You said, Katie lost the second round without Russ when I was there. So what that mean? And Katie responded. Yeah. And our starting center, Kendrick Perkins average of whopping two and three

during that series. You played hard though, champ. And what, what Perkins respond? He said, you got the champ thing. Right. Facts on the averages and facts on the champ part too. Okay. So you owned up to it. And Doc Rivers, as he said earlier, didn't give him the chance to be a superstar. True. True. Also, also, also, also, also, Perk does a lot of stuff that doesn't show up in the stat sheet. I love all these because you give, Perk, you're giving us, like the people who are sitting at home,

you know, blogs to write and things to laugh at. It was just a, I thought Kevin Durant probably got the best of you when he had that response. No, really he got the best of himself because what, what ended up happening was that he shouldn't even comment it that day because it was Russell Westbrook day. But now since we're bringing it up, I know, I don't know if y'all had time, but I know y'all been seeing the videos of the old Celtic days, you know, 08 Celtics and stuff like that. Right. Did you see the game that they showed last Thursday, game five, Eastern Conference against Detroit? Well, me and KG dominated the Wilderness Brothers.

Hey, hey, shaking his head. Yes. He saw, he watched that. Okay. But yeah, because before I got to Oklahoma City, I was a pretty good player. But then when you go to a team where two players are taking 75 out of the 95 shots, it's kind of hard to average more than five points. True. But you know what? That's really easy to hear though. I like, I listen, Perk, if anything, I'm learning that I love the way your brain works because you're almost like you, you got, you got wins all over the place. Yeah, I try to be, I try to be, but you know, you know, it was crazy. It was actually a reporter

from Boston who, who I was commenting to because I said, let's go back to that day. I said that Russell Westbrook was the greatest player, the greatest Thunder ever. I didn't say he was the best player to ever play for the Thunder, but when he's the greatest Thunder player, so. Okay. You did say he was the best player to ever put on an Oklahoma City Thunder jersey. I want, I want to agree with this take, Perk. Can you just really quick explain to me the difference between being the greatest Thunder player and then the best Thunder player? To me, the greatest is like a person who like went with the franchise, held it down, you know,

put up some great numbers. When you hear the name Thunder, you think of this person? Yeah, you think, you think of Russell Westbrook. Okay. Because Katie left, he left the door open. It's just, it's no difference than the Toronto Raptors. Like I think Kyle Larry is the greatest Raptor of all time, but is he the best player that ever put on a Raptors jersey? No. Okay. But you can say that he's, he's Mr. Raptor. So the, so the reporter from Boston says, I can't believe you Perk, Russ never got out of the first round. So I said, what does that mean? Katie, when he was here, he never got out of the second round without Russ. They needed, basically they needed each other. I wasn't shooting a slug at Katie. Katie was just looking so deep

and he was so butthurt that Oklahoma city was giving this big up, rolling the red that he couldn't stand it. Now the bigger man than Katie should have been. Hey man, congratulations to Russell Westbrook. Hope you get everything and more. He deserves that great welcome, welcoming and okay. See blah, blah. And people would have been like, Hey, Katie, man, that's you are all right with me, but instead he didn't take the high road. He took the low road, but that's neither here or there. I mean, the way you talk these things out, I have to say you make a lot of sense. That's what it was. I wasn't actually, Katie was so far off my mind. I wasn't shooting a shot at him. I happened to go on the jump that day and I was praising Russell Westbrook

for his accomplishments. He was going back to okay. See, I knew how the thunder felt about him. He'd lead the organization in every statistical category, by the way, points, rebounds, assists, skills, games played, minutes played. He lead them in every category. So how can he not be Mr. Thunder? Okay. Yeah, I agree with that now. Yeah, that makes me a lot of sense. Greatest versus best. I think we can probably take that argument and put some legs through and adapt it to like any team out there. Now, what do you think about KD now that he's able to sleep at night because he left the Warriors and now he's on the Nets? Do you think that's his team or do you think that's another weak move teaming up with, with Kari? No, I think it was a great move for him. Not a great. I think

it was a good move to me. Now, because to me, even when Katie won his championship, he still, when you see in his body, like, when you win a championship, that's like one of the best feelings in the world for us in sports. Like, I still visualize that Boston Parade and everything about 08, right? And when you look at Katie's face, it was just like, this is, this is like, he wasn't, he almost wasn't fulfilled. Like, it didn't, like, it was like this all it is right here. And to me, with him going to the Nets, I think he's going to be his team. It is his team. I actually think he's going to win the MVP next year on top of that. No matter what, Katie was the best player on the Warriors. That's no debate.

The Warriors recruited the hell out of Katie. We all noticed. But at the end of the day, when you think of the Warriors, still and all, who are you going to say first? Yeah, it's stuff. Yeah. Yeah. No, you're right. So, you know, whether I would have went to the Nets or the Nicks, I mean, that's not my decision. Katie made his decision. I'm okay with it. But I would probably went to the Nicks. They're still the most valuable franchise and I would have went there and turned everything around. I mean, but either way, I'm happy for them being careful. We all right. We give people so we don't have no beef. So, you know, I just hope that he go, he gets healthy, which I think he is. And I got him picked with the MVP. Because one thing

I know about him, him being away from the game of basketball is killing him. Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. All right. So, so we, so we got to the bottom of those two piece. Now, the last one I had that I wanted to ask you about, when was the last time you spoke to Ray Allen? It's been about maybe a year. So, so the beef, you know, with Ray and the Celtics and us, I don't have a beef with Ray. The beef was when I was gone. I was already in Oklahoma City, but I haven't spoke to Ray. KG is my big brother. That's who I rock with. I don't have no hard feelings against Ray, but my loyalty is to Kevin Garnett. And so, if, you know, if him and Ray decide to talk, then hey, then Ray could be cool. Other than that, if I got him, if you forced me

to pick sides, I'm rolling with KG all day long. What is it about KG that made you have such a strong bond with him? Because that's my big brother. He's been loyal to me since day one, since we was on, since he first came to the Celtics, and he's still loyal to me to this day. I could call him for anything, advice. I go to his house, just, you know, hang out with him, we go to dinners, we talk every other day. He's always dropping knowledge on me. We talk about our personal problems. That is the big brother that I never had. So, you know, my loyalty is towards KG, and I'm rocking with him to the casket clothes. What did you think about his performance in Uncut Gyms? Good question. I thought he did great. That's KG, though. He was just

himself. I thought he did great, in my opinion. I thought he did a pretty good job of doing what he'd do. He was KG. He was able to be himself. And, you know, I thought he did an excellent job. I really did. Who do you think would have won the title this year if they had actually finished the season? Let's hope they still do, but who would have been your pick? The Lakers. The Lakers were peaking at the right time. Braun was on his way of challenging Giannis to, in my eyes, to winning the MVP. They have the best duo in the league since Kobe and Shaq and Anthony Davis and LeBron James. And most importantly, the role players on that team were starting to be stars in that role. Guys like Avery Bradley, Javelin McGee, Caldwell Polk started playing better. Danny

Green, Kyle Kuzma was signing his niche. And then let's not even talk of the resurrection of the White House. A straight monster. And, you know, a lot of people don't give Frank Vogel credit, but Frank Vogel used to have those Indiana Pacers really battling out with the Miami Heat. And Jay Kidd over there on the bench. Phil Handy, who's one of the, who is the best player development guy in the NBA, hands down. There's no question about it. But I thought LeBron James and Anthony Davis were on the mission. They were peaking at the right time. They were playing beautiful basketball and adding the March twin from Detroit was huge for them. And Deion Waders was huge for them. Because one thing about it, you always want to have a deep team. And here's why.

Everyone is not going to have minutes, but you want, you want to keep pressure on your role guys to perform. Like when I was with the Celtics, I knew if I didn't go out there and do what I needed to do and do my job, I always had to look over my shoulder and PJ Brown, Leon Poe, a big baby. And you want to keep that pressure because it, it makes, it holds guys accountable. Yeah. One name you didn't bring up there was your guy, Rizan Rondo. Trouble in paradise between you guys? No, no, no, no. We all good. Rondo is Rondo. You know how playoff Rondo is. Things just don't have to be said. See, the thing about the Lakers is out of everybody that's in the NBA, they have the most experience, playoff experience, championship pedigree.

When you look at the roster, Javelin McGee champion, Bond James champion, Quinn Cook champion, Rondo champion, Danny Green champion, the white Howard took a team to the finals. You know, they are really, really experienced, battle tested. And you know, that's why I had the Lakers to win the championship this year. I saw your comments today. I'm a Bulls fan and you said that Boylan's got to be next. And I couldn't agree more because I don't think he's, you know, was qualified to be a head coach to begin with. My question though is more about the front office and the perception around the league that players have about the Bulls. How long will it take for free agents to be like, Hey, this isn't just a completely dysfunctional franchise. And how long

will that like that take hold with guys? I know everyone talks in the NBA and that's been something that's talked about where guys are like, Hey, the Bulls don't know what they're doing. Why would anyone go there? Well, the thing is that they could change it. It could be overnight if they have a right coach. If they have a right coach, it could be overnight. It could be an instant change. All of a sudden you're like, Oh, they got this coach over here. I want to go play for him. I like this talent. I like the way that they're running things. You know, it could be changed overnight. Or you could stay the way it is with the wrong hire. You could keep Jim boiling or you could hire the wrong coach and you could still be right here trading water. Or you could, you

know, get you the right coach in there, change the coaches and you could be, you know, in the Bahamas, Northland looking at a colorful fish. You know, who's, you know, who's available, Mark Jackson. Who is that? I don't want Mark Jackson. You know, in my mind, you know, in my mind, I was thinking Mark Jackson. I was thinking Mark Jackson, Sam Cassell. I would love to see Sam Cassell get his first shot. I was even thinking the Damian style of mine. He did a great job at Pacific. Even Tai Lu. See, and here's the thing,

you got to bring, it's a different type. It's not like old school no more. Like these old school coaches are coming extinct. Like guys, it's a players league. You got Adam Silva. He's a players commissioner. You know, like think about it. Like guys, we have a fashion week in the NBA. Guys are able to wear different fashion when God rest his soul. When David Stern was in office, we had a rule. We had to start wearing suit and ties. Adam Silva changed all that up. So now as coaches, you have to change also. You got to give young blood in there that can relate to guys that, you know, you got to understand that you might walk in and have time that a guy might be on Twitter or Instagram looking at a highlight that they just done. That's just the nature of it.

And you got to be able to understand that. So you got to get guys in there that's going to understand the players that's going to have the players ready to run through a wall for them and buy it to their system. So to me, you got to go young. I almost think that Greg Poptime is almost up. You know, he is great of a job as he done, but you know, at some point we all run our course and you know, maybe it's time for new change over there with the Spurs. Yeah. What about coach Perk? You interested in getting on that side of it? No, no. I'm loving this media too much. You know why? Because I could just sit back. I could watch the games from home or my hotel room. I'm already a huge fan of basketball and I could just go on television and talk my shit about hoops.

I don't have to spend all those long hours. A guy calling me at 11 30 midnight, 11 30 at night or midnight telling me they want to go to the gym to get the exercise and I've got to go. No, no, I ain't doing no right now. I'm really, really cool right where I'm at. All right. I want to flash back real quick to 2008 to wheelchair gate. Paul Pierce gets injured. He gets he gets taken off the court in a wheelchair later on what 13 14 15 years later. He says that the real reason he got wheeled off in that game. I think it was game one right of the NBA finals. He says real reason he got wheeled off was because he shit himself. You were there. Was there any incline? Did you know that Paul Pierce had just doodled in his pants? Or did you think he was injured? I knew after the

game. I didn't know during the time of the injury, but I knew after the game. And by the way, that was a clever ass tricky pool. Like whoever would have thought it in, right? Like he could just call the time out and go run off the court. So like that was a, that was a clever idea with Paul. Paul was, but that's just like his game. Paul, the way he goes about life and the way he thinks is just how he plays. He got a lot of deceptive in his game and in life. So you never know what Paul is thinking, but that was really, really clever. Cause I don't know if it would happen to me. I don't know how it would happen to this situation. And I think that was during the time. And I think that was during the time when we was wearing a white tights too.

James Harden himself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know what we're saying. Yeah. All right. I got one last, not even a question, but a statement, Perkin, this has been awesome. You are now, by the way, a recurring guest. So whenever we want you on the talk NBA, you're legally obligated to call in just so you know. So okay. Perfect. Perfect. All right. So I want to clear the air here. I have some old tweets about you. I'm going to just read one of them on May 7th, 2014. I don't know what, I think that was Clippers Thunder. I tweeted, I'd be as mad as Kendrick Perkins too if my hands flat out refused to work. So I don't even know what that was in a relation to. I don't know what you did, but sounds like your hands weren't working that night. So I just want to,

now that our relationship has started here, I want to be open with you. You know what? You know, in my mind, I was like, I wonder if I call somebody some money for the game. I wonder if this guy is betting on the game. Yes. Yes. My apologies. Yes. I mean, in my defense, you do have to realize like when you playing, when I was playing with their young Oklahoma City Thunder team, they weren't passing the ball at Austin. So you didn't never know when you were going to get a pass. It probably wasn't that my hands weren't working, but I probably was just shocked that the ball actually got passed. That's, that's a good point because it like, I mean, obviously I'm not comparing playing stupid pickup games on Saturday morning, the NBA, but I

get passes sometimes and they go right off my hands because I'm like, I'd never expected anyone to want me to shoot the ball here. Right. Well, you actually, hold on. You had eight points that game. So I was, you know what? I was wrong. You had eight points that game. I'm looking it up right now. You had eight points in 25 minutes played and nine rebounds. So hand up. I was wrong. You must have been, I must have bet on the thunder and at some moment you were like, you pissed me off and I was like, what the fuck's going on? Okay. It's okay. I mean, it's cool. You know, I understand. Cause if you, especially if you had money on the game, man, you know, and you, and I probably did some dumb

shit. Look, I'm not, listen, I'm not shying away that I had a couple of bloopers in my, in my career that probably would have pissed a lot of people off, but hopefully I made you more money than I, I lost. I, you know, then you lost probably. Well, no, because I'm a terrible gambler, but you tried. So that's not on you. That's on me. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not putting that one on you at all. I appreciate it. Yeah. All right. Well, Perk, thank you so much. It's been a lot of fun. We really appreciate it. And hopefully basketball comes back so that we can have you back on and tweet out some more highlights of stone when he gets back on the court because I watched that clip and he is an absolute beast. Okay. We'll do,

we'll do. He ain't trying to right now, but I got you. I'm going to tweet some more out, but I appreciate it, fellas. Y'all, y'all keep doing your thing, man. Really, we'll talk. Much respect, much love. I love what y'all doing. I really appreciate y'all having me on. All right. Thanks Perk. Thanks so much, Perk. Appreciate it, man. Oh, I have a good one. You too. See you man. That interview with Perk was brought to you by our great friends at Me Undies. I love my mayonnaise. I'm wearing a pair as we speak. It's the only underwear I wear. That's the truth. That's not me saying this because some company told me to put it in ad read. It's the only type of underwear that I wear. It's my mug. It's my mugsy jeans. And then underneath that,

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All you have to do is go to me undies.com slash take that's me undies.com slash take. Okay, let's get some segments and we got our Mount flush more. First segment we have is Bad Sports Town. Wait, what is it? Taiwan? Yeah, the island nation of Taiwan, Bad Sports Town. They got baseball started again in Taiwan. Good Sports Town. But they've got fans that are all cardboard cutouts. Bad Sports Town. Bad Sports Town. That's actually. They can't leave early. Yeah, they can't. And also don't have to worry about foul balls hitting them. So you've actually talked me into Taiwan being a good Sports Town. Yeah, I actually think that if we go by all accounts, we're going to go to a system where

there won't be fans. I'd be cool with filling the seats with anything and then piping in fake noise. Dogs. Dogs. No, no, because you need owners for dogs. What if it's just free play dogs though? Free play dogs would be good. Maybe stuffed animals. What about this idea? You just you put a tarp down over all the seats and it's a green screen. And so then you can overlay all the best fans from seasons past doing things like catching foul balls, drinking their beer out of the foul ball cup. Yes. Just an all star reel of fans. They do need to rethink it because it can't just be no fans. Only Marlins Man is allowed to attend games. Did you see Marlins Man is he is finally what he had a tweet the other day. He's like we

need to he's still pushing that 9 11 should be first responders day everywhere. Like in the middle of pandemic, he's not getting off of his and I actually agree with him. I don't know if right now is the right time, but I agree with there should be a day. Yeah, absolutely. I agree with that. It should be 9 11. Now I haven't seen him a while. They're telling you to stay away from your parents and times like this. All right, let's do our mouth flush more. PFT, you have the first pick. So it's places to be drunk. Okay, Bubba, you okay? You're coughing again. Places to be drunk. Okay, Mount Fleshmore, Hank, you got a lot of heat. And it's best places to be drunk. The Mount Fleshmore best places to be drunk. No, no, no, we're picking the worst places

to be drunk. Yeah, you were mistaken on the last show. You thought that I was dead on shout to everyone that supported me. It's a mouth flush more places to be drunk. Okay, the Mount Rushmore places to be drunk would be the best places mouth flush more would be the worst. Yep. Okay, my number one work. Okay, when you accidentally get called in, you don't know that you're going to have to work. You don't maybe you've had too much to drink the night before, and you show up still drunk. It can seem fun, maybe at the moment. But the second you have to do real work, and you know that you're getting caught, it's just anxiety and city. What about a bartender? That okay, fun, only time, only time it's okay. But I agree with you there. All right, my first

pick will be behind the wheel of a car. That is definitely the worst place to be drunk. Okay, yeah, agreed. You don't want to be behind the wheel of a car when you're drunk. Okay, I think you can all agree. Are you guys going to speak out against drunk driving? I've never experienced it, but I hear that it's bad. Are you going to speak out against drunk driving? I too have never experienced it. Okay, all right, good. We'll speak out against it. My number one, I'll go with I had in your car on the way to work. I feel like that's too close to what you guys just said. I won't say that. I will go with church. Okay. Well, what if you just like taking sacrament too many times? Blood of Jesus, it's wine. You're the biggest lightweight of all time,

and you're an embarrassment in there for your total verge. You should not be. I've never taken second. And then my second one, I will go in a long line for the bathroom. Oh, good one. Hey, you're back, baby. You are back. I never left. Okay, well, you had kind of left. All right. Have you ever just given up in a line and just said fuck it and pissed yourself? No, but I've definitely made some decisions where it's like you won't be in public in other situations, but you're like, I this is coming out. I'm just going to do what I can and hope I don't get a public arrest. All right. You accept the charge before you pee. I'm probably, I'm acknowledging the fact that I might get like a public display of drunkenness, but I don't

worth it. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Mine or just going to women's bathroom. My next one. I mean, that's a no brainer. Mine would be with your will use it for guys and girls, your significant others family for the first time. The worst. You do not want to be that guy to be drunk with your significant others parents for the first time, though. Still don't want to be that guy or girl because you will 100% or it's a bonding experience. It's got to happen sometime. I don't further down the line. I think it's okay. It's actually great further down the line as you come closer. Once it's established, there's nowhere to go, but up if you fuck up. I think you then become the drunk guy forever. Yep. And you like, it's like the Ryan Howard starting the fire,

fire guy. You don't want to be fire guy. Okay. My second pick is going to be jail jail would be bad going to be in jail. Although Hank, were you no, you weren't drunk in jail. No, I've been drunk in jail. Would you wish you were drunk? I have been drunk in jail, though, a different time. Okay, I got arrested for the non drunk time. Okay, so there we go. Being drunk in jail sucks. I got arrested for internal possession of alcohol. No big deal. Nice internal possession. Yeah, mine was under 21. And I was basically arrested for drinking beer. Yeah, there's like one toilet in the middle of the room. So yeah, and if you're drunk, you have to hit that several times, you get confused, you wake up a couple times during the night and

you forget that you're in jail. That's a bad feeling. Yeah, waking up still drunk in prison. Yes. My next one is going to be in class. So I think a lot of people out there have done it. I know I have where you show up to class, whether it's like senior high school in college, you've had some day drinking going on, you're in full fuck it mode seems like it'd be fine at the time might be funny. And then class starts and you just think everybody here knows that I'm drunk. Yes. And then also you have to pee again, you have to get up several times to go pee and then everybody does know they always know. Yes, always always know they always always know. All right. Uh, how about in the backseat of a long cab ride fucking worst when you're just hammered and

you're just getting that like, okay, now I'm starting to get the spins and I feel like shit and I just want to get home. That sucks. Cab ride at the end of the night. And there's probably no truth. Always feels longer. But if you're in a yellow cab or an actual tax cab, it always feels worse than if you're in a lift or an Uber, especially like a summer when you're like in back of a hot cab with no AC. Everything's hard in there. Sweating drunk is the worst feeling. Yeah, you're bouncing off doors. Oh, all right. Your last two Hank. In your parents' car when you're underage. Yep. So like if you were like drinking and then you like, all right, I'm gonna get picked up, but like you have to try and pretend like you're not drunk and you're sitting there

like the whole time just hoping they don't ask you questions or you're like, that's the worst feeling. Like I just got to get home. Yeah. And then maybe I can like get away with this and you never do. And then my last one, I had jail. I will go with the gym. Drunk in the gym. Drunk in the gym. That's how injuries happen. We're having a routine though. That's true. Well, that could be one of the side effects that I don't think we've really developed. There's nothing worse than like when you're when you're really drunk and you're like, I'm going to play this sport. Like I'm going to shoot some hoops and then you're just sweaty, exhausted and feel like you want to puke after four seconds. And you're terrible at the counterpoint on the golf course. Golf course, not really

a sport. True. Although sports are back. All right, my last one will be an AA meeting. You don't want to be drunk there. True. That's a really bad place to be drunk. True. So all right, your last one. My last one is going to be right before you have sex. Although it's going to work. No, I think sometimes it's like, dude, I'm about to be a stallion. Is it going to work? Yeah, I think it's stallion time. Yeah, you guys are mad at me for fried pickles. That's the worst pick I've ever heard. What? Right before, while you're having sex, great. No, I think right before you feel drunk, you don't have the anxiety. Yeah, you don't know if it's not going to work yet. In that moment, you don't. I'm just going to, I like it, like, I'm just going to go for it. I think it would be,

yeah, you don't have those those reservations or gas. Yeah, that's true. Sometimes you think about it. Bad pick PFT. It's not mine. This is just like what people would say. Bad pick. Oh, so you're pandering. No, I'm just saying in general, when you think of bad places. So is it your pick or what you think people would? I panicked. I panicked with the last one. All the other ones are my I had the only other ones I had were, I mean, I with your boss, but that's kind of at work. Can I substitute my last pick? No, no, it's like chess. Why don't you take your hand off the move with your boss is bad, but that's kind of at work. And then being in a subway system sucks. That's drunk, because you also feels like it takes forever and you can get confused very easily. You get seasick.

Yeah. Oh, a boat wouldn't be bad. Yeah. Although being drunk on a boat. Yeah. I had my my other one here was a big grocery store. Just like wandering around the aisles and not really knowing where you're going. Yeah, grocery store. Although that can be fun too. When you get on this cart, and you go a little crazy roller coaster, roller coaster sucks to be drunk on on a median in Indianapolis with a bag full of drugs and cash. Yeah, who's that? Oh, that was Jim Marseille. How about what do you guys think about laying down in bed at night when you're like really drunk and you're like, fuck, this is like nothing that I can't do anything like it's almost it's almost like the next moment you're going to have is either going to be puking or waking up violently hung

over. Yeah, that's a that's a that's a feeling that kind of sucks, although I think it comes after a lot of shitty things. So it's probably a relief. What about when the cops come? Yeah, well, that's a rush of a general. And so you kind of get undrunk for a second. Like I got this. Yeah, it would actually be when you successfully evade the cops and your adrenaline dies down. That's a shitty stroke because you're like, damn it. Now I'm out of breath and want to puke. Yep. Right after a tequila shot. It's a bad bad moment when you're really drunk and you take a tequila shot. Yeah, that's a bad feeling. I used to have a problem for like a few years. It doesn't happen anymore, although I don't take shots much anymore. But I would when I was really drunk and I would

drink tequila, it would if I it was like a sign like you're too drunk, it would literally come straight out my nose. But that's a that's a bad place to be drunk when when when someone orders a round of tequila. That's a bad place to be drunk. Like already really drunk getting off a plane. Yeah, being on a plane drunk is sweet. I think there's that element though, like you can't get too drunk on a plane because then it really starts to suck. Like if you get oh yeah, yeah, I agree with that. Yeah, like a nice light buzz is a great thing to have on a plane of like really getting drunk. Like if you've had a few in the airport and you have a few on the plane and you have that moment like fuck, I'm actually really drunk. There's something about being on a plane

that makes people more violent and like more you can't stand. Yeah, exactly. That must be what it is because you always hear these stories of people like just trying to fight stewardesses and attendance and stuff. And I don't think that those same people would fight a random bouncer in a bar. But for some reason, they're on a plane. They want to fight everybody. You know what's crazy to think about? I thought about this earlier today. We are in the midst of the longest stretch we will ever have probably in our adult lives that we won't be on a plane. It might be true. Love it. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Yeah, Hank, remember when you couldn't fly? Yeah. You floreed already. Flore is loving this time. Total floreo. That's what they call it for people who are scared of flying.

It's a floreo. He pulled a floreo, dude. John Madden, too. People don't remember this, but John Madden used to have to take an RV across the country to every game he was going through. Little giants taught me that. All right. Let's do guys on chicks before we do that. Remember, watch the scheme on HBO. We're going to do a review and we also have Christian Dawkins on the show on Friday. So watch that. We're going to do a review of it. It's an interesting story about the NCAA investigation and basically the 2017 Rick Petino, all that stuff, Arizona. So watch that. Hank, guys on chicks, we'll finish off our Wednesday tax day. No tax day show. Sup, Mr. 35, 1D Duggerton in Honk. My ex-boyfriend, one and a half years and I are both still in

our college town during this quarantine. We broke up two weeks ago, but are still hanging together as friends with benefits. Last night, one of his friends found my Tinder and sent it to him. He confronted me and said, he doesn't want me to be on Tinder while we're still hooking up. I think it shouldn't matter to him, especially since it's not like I can just leave and hook up with any of them, but he wants me to delete it. Who's right? I mean, you can just say it's just during the quarantine. It's a catfish. Yeah. You can't go try to hook up with somebody right now. The thing about quarantine is if you've made contact with somebody at any point in that quarantine, you almost have to hang out only with that person. It's like Caleb, our friend Caleb,

who's basically being bullied by a bunch of teenagers right now. Yeah. So this guy just kind of entrapped you into a relationship. I feel like, yeah, go ahead and set up dates for the second this thing is over. All right. Well, that leads into our next question. This girl, I've always had a thing for, recently messaged me, but she currently lives over 300 miles away. With quarantine season in full effect, there's no possible way to go and visit her or hang out in a person. Is it worth texting and FaceTime and constantly knowing that nothing will come from it for several months or my blue balling myself? Thanks guys. Cyber the long game. Ever heard of cyber sex? That too. Yeah. Cyber it. What would you do if I were there right now?

How wet are you? These kind of girls love that. I'm getting there. I bet picture myself going, going, switching back and forth between my tongue and my penis in your clit. Just say, promise, promise not to share this picture with anybody and then just wait for her response. And this guy's acting like he has something better to do. Right. That's true. Like, what are you going to do, dude? Like, just might as well have nothing when this is over. This is the perfect time to just put in a shitload of game. And then when you, yeah, when you come out, you're going to be the guy who was simping her all along the way. Then you can come out and be like, Oh, well, you know, that was quarantine me. Like this is, I decided to change myself once quarantine was over.

Like, sorry, that was the old me. Yeah, quarantine me. There's so many excuses built into this quarantine. I like that. I was just going insane because I hadn't had so horny yet. I know some guys that allow their ladies to use vibrators. Are they in or that don't allow their ladies to use vibrators? Are they insecure because they don't think they can compete with the vibrator and may not get her off? Yes. Yeah, extremely insecure. Yeah. No, that's listen, you should be happy that there's less work that you have to do. Right. Have the vibrator is like a great closer. Call that fucking righty in. Yeah, throwing 102. You should like gas and people. You should carry one with you in your backpack at all times just in case you get you. All you need to worry

about is getting a quality start. Six innings, three earned runs. Then you go to the, then you go to the bullpen. You sound like somebody who is afraid of a machine taking your job and you need to learn to embrace the machines. Yes. Sup, Leroy, Coach Dugs and Private Honk. My boyfriend and I have been distanced for quite some time during quarantine. We spent a lot of time together on FaceTime, but most of the calls consist of me watching the screen frustrated while he plays Call of Duty with the boys. I finally got fed up with how he ignores me. So while I thought he was listening to the game, I ranted at him and told him how big of a dick he was being and how I was even questioning our relationship. Turns out he had one side of his headset off so he could listen to me and heard

every bit of it. What can I do to make up for it? Sounds like you were just saying. Yeah, sounds like you just said what you felt. Yeah, you were just sharing your experiences with him and that you're let down by him because he's making you watch a live stream of him playing Call of Duty. I think you accidentally just fell into like a good relationship with open communication. Yeah. I accidentally told my boyfriend how I really feel. What should I do? I accidentally expressed what I felt in terms of anger about my boyfriend. The more I need from him in this relationship, I really beef that one off. Why are you even just joining his Twitch stream? Yeah. Do F in the stream. I have been trying to

get my girlfriend to be like, hey, Call of Duty, it's fun. Watch. There's just not even the slightest bit of hint of interest, anything. If I'm playing Call of Duty, I might as well be in another planet. You should just write F on a piece of paper and hold it up to your camera as he's playing Call of Duty. Yes. Way to fuck that up, dude. Or get really good at it. That means that you're yeah, get really good and beat him at it. Beat his ass. If you beat him, then it'll stop. They love it. All right. Last one. It's hard for me to imagine that this is true. My fiance and I had a postpone our wedding because of the Rona. We moved it to Halloween this year. Have any of you ever been to a Halloween wedding? People want to dress up. We're for it,

but we got to make sure we have the best costumes at our own wedding. Oh my God. What should we be? Dumb and Dumber. Always plays. You're getting married at your own wedding. I don't. Have you ever been to a Halloween wedding? I have not. It's wild. It sounds like it might be fun though. I can't be like, is that, there's no way. What day of the week is Halloween? Let's figure this out. It's got to be a Saturday this year, right? Or Friday. That's, I guess, how we can figure out. You should go as, uh, as Joffrey. Yeah, Saturday night. Wow. It's true. Go as Joffrey and Sansa. No, go and then kill her dad. No, go as Cersei and, uh, what's his name? Jamie. Jamie. Yeah. Brother's sister. Yeah. Just send out some really creepy vibes. Is this

an Alabama wedding? No, you should go as like, um, do something really funny. Like he should go, you should go as like the horse and he goes as the ass. That's pretty good. Just like gallop in. Uh-huh. Well, you're fucked though. Like this is weird. I can't imagine a Halloween. I think, okay. Here's what you do. All right. Hold on. I would jokingly suggest that I go as the bride and you go as the groom and then ha ha. Won't that be funny? I'm going to dress again. Here's what you actually do. This is actually a practical solution for you. You do like, uh, you tell everyone you're going to dress up classy. So suits, maybe even black tie and then do the masks from Eyes Wide Shut, Fidelio. It's just a big orgy. Fuck time. Yeah. But that, you know,

like those masks that like, you can have everyone do like really cool masks, but at least they look. Yeah. They look, they look normal. Yeah. Or you can go, you can just have like the tux and the wedding dress. You tell everybody in attendance, we're not dressed. Nobody is dressing up for this. And then you just have tear away pants and tear away shirts and boom underneath. Just think about this right now. Before you let everyone dress up at your wedding, just ask yourself this simple question. How many Joe exotics do I want at my wedding? Because right now you probably got five. You probably got five Joe exotics, probably got three Carol Baskins and maybe even throw a Jeff Lowe. Like you're fucked. So that's going to be the thing

everyone's wearing. That's what they should do, the Carol Baskin with the guy on the leash. Oh, the sim police. Yeah, that's pretty good. And then you have somebody that like built a seadoo around their body and they go as James. If you got live tigers, this actually would be a pretty sick. Maybe just do the whole wedding at Doc Antle's place. And then you can just marry Doc Antle and be one of his like 16 wives. Well, I was going to say just marry all of his wives. Yeah. Okay. Well, we give you enough solutions. Tell us how it goes. Actually, invite us. We won't go. No, we'll send Bubba. That would be funny. Bubba, that'd be funny. It goes Hyman Roth and Donna Groome. Yeah. Yeah, do that. Do that. All right. We'll see

everyone on Friday. Love you guys. Cool sports.