Pardon My Take - March Madness, Duke's Scare And Paul Bissonnette
Episode Date: March 25, 2019Duke almost lost to UFC and this is the chalkiest tournament ever (2:27 - 7:56). All the favorites advance, Rick Barnes is the "this is fine" dog, and Bill Self picked a perfect time to get blown out ...(7:56 - 11:15). Gronk retires (11:15 - 22:17). Who's back of the week including the ads we fucking hate after 4 days of basketball (22:17 - 28:59). Paul Bissonnette joins the show to talk about Tom Izzo and coaches that pushed him hard, playoff hockey (28:59 - 62:05). Segments include Stay Woke Antonio Brown doesnt want to be a Raider, Lebron Blames, Sorry not Sorry Robert Kraft, and Monday Reading Mike Francesca's big statement. You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake
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Hey, pardon my take listeners.
You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.
On today's part in my take, we have our good friend, Paul Bissonette,
Biz Nasty, very interesting conversation actually about coaches,
Tom Izzo in the news, and also we get some hockey lingo that we have
had no idea about, which is always fun.
We recap the tournament four days straight of basketball.
We have a who's back of the week and a Monday reading before we get to all that.
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And then I can't live all on the sun. Oh, no, we're going to run down to electric
high value and then we're taking higher.
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It's part of my take, presented by Bob Sturzkovs.
Welcome to part of my take, presented by our good friend Zazz T-shirts.
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So go buy it right now. It's a fire t-shirt. Go buy it.
Today is Monday, March 25th.
I feel like my eyes are about to bleed.
We made it. We made it to the first weekend.
We made it to the worst Monday.
I actually contend it's the worst Monday of the year.
There needs to be some sort of sporting event that comes on.
Mac football.
Or yeah, yeah, exactly. Play your spring game here.
You play every game here, your entire November schedule
on the Monday after March madness.
Yeah, that realization that you get after having nothing but games for four days
nonstop and then there's just an end. It just ends and you're like, what the hell?
I have to wait. Where's my new tip?
When's the next game?
I should be on my couch right now.
Why am I why am I not watching sports?
Yes. So you're probably listening to this.
You're probably depressed.
You're probably either commuting or sitting on the toilet
because you probably will sit on the toilet for the entire day.
Oh, it's a huge toilet. It's a huge toilet.
Yeah, after after like all those games back to back,
probably eating a lot of chicken wings,
yeah, drinking a lot of coffee because you're you're upset and you're groggy
because it's Monday morning.
Big day for plumbers.
Big day for plumbers and March madness, the chalkiest chalk tournament
I think we've ever had.
Not to brag, but I called it. You did. You did.
You had all chalk.
It's basically just one's, two's, three's, a couple of five sprinkled in there.
Oh, there was a 12 that one.
Yeah, Oregon. Yeah. Who did they play?
They played a 13.
You see Irvine.
OK. Yep.
And they beat him in the second round.
Listen, I don't even care.
Wisconsin, if you want to talk about Wisconsin,
we won a national championship today.
Any other school won a national championship today. Women's hockey.
All right, congrats. Shout out. Shout out.
They played Minnesota.
I assume they beat Bemidji State in North Dakota on the way to that victory.
There's only four teams that play hockey, college hockey.
But we've made it.
It is the on the other side of March Madness.
A lot of chalk, a lot of blowouts.
I hate to say it, but kind of a shitty tournament so far.
Yes. But for gambling, it wasn't that bad.
Because of course, because all the blowouts were like,
I was still interested till the very end,
because I wanted to know how I was going to lose this bet.
Yes, exactly.
I had a rough, rough start to it.
But, you know, shoot or shoot.
Yeah. So you got the only way that you lose is if you stop betting.
I would. I made my my debut on 60 minutes.
We all made our debut.
That's right. That seems like it was forever ago.
And it was just gambling is awesome.
That was the that was the line that I made on 60 minutes.
So I'm sure my mom is very proud of me that that was how I got on 60 minutes.
But yeah, you're right.
If you're if you gamble, if you have your bracket, it was it's always exciting.
It's just there was never there was not if you can look back and be like there.
What's the moment?
The moment is Taco Falls, Taco, not jumping to dunk.
Taco Fall, fouling Zion Williamson with, you know, you know, 20 seconds left.
And then Duke having an egregious pushoff on the offensive rebound
and the ball going in seriously hurt and Hank somehow surviving,
not having to own a cat for another weekend.
Yeah, Bron Lockwood was trending on Twitter, trending on Twitter.
And Hank, you were shitting your pants.
No, yes, you were so scared. I was never, I was never concerned.
Hank was very, very scared. I don't blame you for being scared.
That's a big commitment. Well, I wasn't concerned.
And then the game started and I didn't really do my research.
I didn't know too much about UCF when I realized it was Johnny Dawkins,
who was like Coach K's first ever star player.
And his Johnny Dawkins son was the star player on UCF.
I was like, this is some bad video.
Then do your research. Plus they had Taco. It was Taco Fall.
But you know what, like credit to Coach K, the way that he handled that
after the game, after he just gave a devastating loss to UCF.
Oh, I mean, they didn't all class and then went and spoke to their players
about how it's going to be OK.
Hugs. Yeah. That's what I love about Coach K.
It's about the lessons.
It's about teaching the other team how to lose gracefully when he wins.
And then when he loses, how the other team didn't win gracefully
and giving sermons about that.
You actually win when you lose to Coach K because the life lessons
that he passes along to you are more valuable than a win.
Exactly. You should when you play Duke, you should be like,
the best outcome here is to lose and have Coach K rub some of his hair die up on me.
Yeah. Come into the locker room and give everybody a hug.
And then everyone's got like this little like charcoalish gray stuff
on their on the side of their cheeks.
Hank was so close to losing that he was about to poop his pants
slash his Armand Hammer clump and seal.
So thank you to Armand Hammer clump and seal.
They have been sponsoring Hanks.
You're going to get a cat.
I feel like you're going to lose.
You're going to get a cat.
Even if Duke wins, I'm going to buy you a cat and break into your apartment
and just leave it there. Yes.
Armand Hammer has pledged that if Hank does get a cat, Hank, adopts a cat.
Let's make that clear.
He's going to adopt a cat.
We're big adopts, guys.
Armand Hammer clump and seal cat litter.
It destroys odor on contact.
We're talking dead, gone, finished, never to be smelled again.
And they will give Hank a year's supply of Armand Hammer clump and seal.
So if you have Armand Hammer clump and seal, if you have a cat,
go by Armand Hammer clump and seal.
It's so effective.
This guaranteed guaranteed to keep Hanks home odor free for seven days.
And that's not easy. Hank, I actually offered you mid like I think it was
within a minute left. I said, let's make a deal.
You can get out of this right now.
If you agree to own half a cat.
So just have a cat poop in your house.
Well, you are Armand Hammer clump.
You were having a time of life.
You and PFC were laughing so hard.
You're like, oh, I didn't actually think you were going to have to get a cat.
No, we didn't. I wouldn't have said it otherwise.
Yeah, we wouldn't.
And then watching the air, watching the air getting taken out of the office
when they missed that layup.
It was beautiful. It was a pulse.
And you know what?
It was a bad possession for Duke at the end, too.
I don't know what they were doing.
They just wasted all the time off the clock.
Then Zion drove to the basket when they're down three.
It should have worked.
And if Taco, no, it should have worked.
If Taco Fall didn't get foul trouble,
which I think is impossible for Taco Fall to not get foul trouble
because he basically just stands under the hoop and guys just jump into him.
His hands are everywhere.
UCF wins that game.
And I hate the foul.
The the five fouls in college basketball suck.
They need to fix it.
But yeah, you you survived one.
Now, all our all our eggs are in the Buzz Williams basket for Virginia Tech.
Yes. So we're counting on Buzz.
We're hoping Buzz will come on the show at some point this week
and we are counting on Buzz to come through.
So who do we have?
We have Virginia, by the way, Virginia on Friday.
That first half was so awesome where like everyone
if Virginia had lost to a 16 seat again,
they would have had to cancel the program.
Yeah, you you just shut the whole school down flat out.
I mean, the worst thing to ever happen.
And it was so perfect that they had that first half
where everyone had to sit there and be like, this can't happen again.
Yeah. And it was happen again.
It was. It was happening.
It was. Shout out, Gardner Web.
Nice try, guys.
Purdue, Tennessee, UNC.
UNC Auburn is going to be awesome.
It's going to be a sweet game.
It's going to be points, points, points.
One big takeaway from the UNC game.
Luke May might have the weirdest voice in the world.
Yeah. Have you heard him talk? Yes.
He's like if Jason Aldean was in Bone Thugs.
Like that. It doesn't work when I like when I watch him talk
and I listen to him, he gives me a stroke.
My brain breaks. I'm like, I don't understand this.
And he's a forever guy.
He's been at UNC forever.
Yeah. And Kobe White.
I I don't understand when guys have hair that big,
how they like don't topple over.
I know hair doesn't weigh that much.
It's not. It's like a very light.
And I'm like, how the hell can he run this fast
without just like Humpty Dumping himself and just cracking?
It does make head and shoulders fakes a lot more efficient, though.
If you've got like a lot of hair, yeah, it'll disorient you.
Yeah, absolutely.
Rick Barnes survives Iowa comeback overtime.
Rick Barnes actually looks like this is fine dog.
When things start going poorly for Tennessee
and for Rick Barnes in the tournament, he just has this face.
We talked about on Friday how you'd never want to bet on a team
where their coach, when they flash to him, it's like this guy
has no control over what's happening.
Yeah, he does look confused a lot.
He's just scared, confused, all the emotions, the house is burning down.
And he just sits there and is like, it'll be fine.
It'll be fine. It'll be fine.
Yeah. No, Tennessee, they looked OK.
Yeah, they look really good, actually.
Admiral Schofield is a beast.
Yes, he's a unit.
Although he didn't even play the overtime, credit to him.
That's how good of a teammate he is.
He's like, you know what, you got this, guys. Yeah, I like that.
I like Tennessee.
Tennessee looks like they could go and run.
Swag Calipari was at all time swag levels.
Oh, yeah. Wearing all black with a big chain on.
Oh, yeah, we're hopefully get Brad Calipari on as well.
But so overall, boring.
You could never say the tournament's boring,
but there was there has not been a moment.
The only moment is a team that didn't win.
And that's UCF almost beating Duke.
Yep. Survive in advance.
Survive in advance.
The tourney.
Also, ACC flexes on everyone.
Route 10 had a good first round.
Almost all their teams won.
Want to make sure to include this just in case it happens.
But Leroy broke the news of Rick Petino is going to be signing.
All right, so I'm happy you brought that up.
He's actually wrote that down.
Yeah. Play the music, Hank, here.
We have an intervention.
It's not me.
Leroy addicted.
It's not me.
By proxy.
You are.
Is Leroy addicted to breaking news?
Yes, he is.
And that's why he's breaking.
Trying to break Rick Petino.
Yeah.
Craig Kimbrel.
Yep.
What at what point is the vetting process?
That is a question.
Yeah.
What is going on?
Is there a vetting process?
Yes.
The vetting process.
Yeah.
Is there a vetting process?
Yes.
The vetting process.
Yes.
The vetting process is thus.
I get a text from the person that runs the Leroy account.
Okay.
And if it looks like a good shot.
It's you.
No, it's not me.
You don't run it?
You think I run my own dogs?
Okay.
Got it.
Got it.
I actually don't.
It's Jake.
Okay.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So he sends me a text.
Yeah.
And then if it looks good, I have Leroy run with it.
Okay.
So you've been running Craig Kimbrel News and Rick Petino.
Yes.
And Rick Petino.
I'm going to get the last laugh when Petino signs with the Crimson Tide.
What happens if he doesn't?
Then I'm going to delete the tweet.
And what happens if Craig Kimbrel doesn't sign for...
That one was a heat check.
That one was a heat check.
That was exact numbers too.
Yeah.
Like you're really putting yourself out there.
Yeah.
That one was a heat check.
So that one might get deleted.
I think you're addicted to breaking news.
I think I am too.
I was like, you check after going like two for six.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Exactly.
You're fucking JR Smith of breaking news.
I felt good.
You missed your first three threes.
And then you're like, you know what, fucking, I'm going from half-court.
That's right.
I'm trying to give this news the pipe.
Leroy, he nailed the Anthony Sherman story.
Yes.
The Shermanator.
Which, I mean, obviously that was directly from him.
Yes, correct.
Yes.
Right.
So I knew that one was locked in.
Right.
Whiffed on the Jadavia and Clowney trade.
Whiffed on Eric Berry.
No, that still might happen.
Okay.
But it didn't happen with you.
Malcolm Butler still might happen.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Exactly.
You lose, like if you report something, it doesn't happen within the first like
twenty-four hours.
It's not your report.
It's your dog's Twitter account.
I don't think I have to bat a thousand on the scoops.
But I'm making an honest credit for when Leroy gets right.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
I'm making an honest, good faith effort to vet the news properly before it's, I'm
not just like taking any rumor that comes across my desk.
Got it.
We are somewhat selective at Leroy Enterprises.
And if it feels right, then I'll run with it.
Okay.
So I think you're addicted to breaking news.
I might be.
Yeah.
You have a little bit of addiction.
We need, we're going to have to have an intervention when we get like, when you get
into hockey news and fucking the transfer window in the EPL.
Oh, transfer portal.
No, I'm talking about the EPL.
The transfer window.
You transfer fees.
Yeah.
In August.
Leroy will have to figure out where the, where the Euro button is for like the, instead
of the dollar sign.
Leroy's owner is going to have to maybe Google some soccer players to see if they're actually
real names.
Yeah.
Would be a shame if people started.
Absolutely.
Get fooled on.
Yeah.
Would be a shame if people started sending bogus tips.
No.
Leroy's, his DMs are not open to everyone.
Oh, okay.
So it's a select few.
Got it.
Okay.
So, uh, well, it's, that's the tourney.
I don't really know what else.
Any other big picture?
I mean, it really is like the moment has been UCF almost beating Duke.
I'll get more specific.
Duke, you want to see a rematch to, uh, to really save this thing.
Bill self getting, I cannot stop looking at Bill self's hair after Matt Jones pointed
out, but Kansas getting rocked by Auburn, which if you're going to lose, if you're
going to lose in the tournament, there are definitely specific time slots and the Saturday
night time slot is a great time to lose.
You don't want to lose on that Saturday one o'clock when everyone's watching or the
Sunday one o'clock Saturday night, late Friday night, like no one even knows what happened.
They just, it's just a blur of, oh, well, they weren't even in the turn.
I would say that the moment of the tournament for me was just the picture of Tracy Wolfson
staying next to Taco Fall.
Yes.
That's for sure.
Or Taco Fall on his knees being taller than a guy on VCU.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was pretty good.
That was pretty good.
He is, I mean, he's, we had the debate.
Do you even want to be that tall?
I don't think I would want to be seven, six.
No.
I'm five, 10, which is pretty, you know, that's a good height for an American male.
But seven, six, it's just like everything is inconvenient for you.
Right.
There's nothing in life that's easy if you're seven foot six.
And everyone asks for dunking.
Except for dunking.
Yeah.
Except for dunking.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I have a very particular set of skills and it's just being close to a rim.
I also like how Taco Fall, every time he gets a ball, it's, his hands are so big
too that it's, it's almost like the first time he's touched a ball, like the whole,
the proportions are just insane.
Yeah.
I'll say this though, for a seven foot six dude, Taco Fall is pretty hot.
Yeah.
He's good looking for, for someone that's that tall.
You can look up.
Yeah.
Most people that are like above seven, five, you, they, they aren't that attractive.
What is he going to do?
The obvious exception of Boban.
I was reheating up about him and he, I think he's like a computer science major.
So he's, if he doesn't play in the NBA, which I don't think he's, he would be awesome.
He would be like the first pick in the draft 30 years ago.
And now he's probably not going to make it in the NBA, but imagine Taco Fall like working
at a cube.
That would be amazing.
If he was a coder.
Yes.
He'd get a desk.
I fucking love it.
Oh my God.
He'll play overseas though.
Right.
Yeah.
He'll get something.
He'll do something.
I can't, I can't just accept the fact that this is last time I'm going to see Taco Fall.
No, we'll see him again.
We'll see him again.
Uh, all right.
So the other big news we had was Robert Gronkowski has retired from the NFL.
It was rumored for a very long time.
Uh, Hank said that he was fine.
Remember that all year when you're like, he's fine.
He is fine.
Yeah.
He's fine.
Yeah.
He's fine.
He's not, but he retired.
Greatest of all time.
Yes.
Not even a question.
Greatest tight end of all time.
I actually saw a stat.
I'm going to read his, uh, his farewell, uh, address on Instagram because it's hilarious,
but I saw this stat, which is just insane.
The pro football focus, the grade, the highest single season, uh, tight ends, but, or buy
a tight end since 2010, Gronk is the first seven Jesus Christ.
So basically every single year, yeah, he was amazing.
He was unstoppable.
The greatest tight end of all time and best right tackle and NFL and best, uh, free safety
best free safety.
Yes.
Exactly.
So here is his, his address to the people.
It's perfect Gronk.
I'm going to read it and it's, I'm not like, I'm going to read it word for word.
It all started at 20 years old on, on stage at the NFL draft when my dream came true.
And now here I am about to turn 30 in a few months with the decision I feel is the biggest
of my life so far.
I will be retiring from the game of football today.
I am so grateful for the opportunity that Mr. Kraft and coach Belichick gave to me when
drafting my silliness in 2010.
My life experiences over the last nine years have been amazing, both on and off the field,
the people I have meet, the relationships I have built, the championships I have been
a part of.
I just want to thank the whole New England's Patriots organization for every opportunity
I've been giving and learning the great values of life that I can, can apply to mine.
Thank you to all of Pat's nation around the world for the incredible support since I have
been a part of this first class organization.
Thank you for everyone for accepting who I am and the dedication I have put into my work
to be the best player I could be.
I'm getting there when you masturbate, think about my tongue or your clit and switching
back and forth from my dick to my tongue.
But now it's time to move forward and move forward with a big smile knowing that the
New England Patriots organization, Pat's Nation and all my fans will be truly a big part of
my heart for the rest of my life.
It was truly an incredible honor to play for such a great established organization able
to come in to continue and contribute to keep building success to all my current blah blah
blah blah blah.
At the end he says, cheers to the past for the incredible memories and a huge cheers
to the uncertain of what's next.
I feel like you should know what's next, Rob, but yeah, it's the uncertain of what's next.
Also he had a code in there.
Did you see that?
Yeah.
So shout out to Bottlegate on Twitter.
I think he found out that all the numbers that 20 plus 30 do some math.
So it's the numbers that are in the Instagram caption that he used.
Yeah.
Ready for it?
20 plus 30.
What's that?
50.
Plus 10.
Yeah, I didn't know there was going to be math on the stage.
Yeah.
60 plus 9.
9.
69.
There you go.
So Rob Gronkowski goes out with a 69 joke just as we all expected.
Which member of LMFAO do you think is going to give us Hall of Fame speech?
Uh, that's a good question.
Yeah.
Hall of Famer in five years.
Gronk's going to be the first guy to give us a speech with a DJ in the background.
What are you going to say?
He can also come back.
I actually, I actually, there you go.
I actually don't think that's that crazy.
Halfway through the season?
I think yes.
Halfway through the season.
Like he just doesn't want to deal with off season OTs and all that stuff.
And then if he's perfectly healthy halfway through the season, if Patriots lose someone,
like you don't think they're going to, not going to call him?
Yes.
They'll call him.
And at that point he's going to have not played for nine months and he'll be missing
it no matter what he says.
Yes.
He'll be fresh, feeling good.
He's going to be a wrestler in a movie.
What is he going to do?
Probably all the above.
Probably going to like start a, he'll have some reality show with his brothers or something.
Maybe start like some type of production company.
Yeah.
He'll be on some like, like the rock has a NBC show.
Braun has a show like he'll have some type of like fitness, like challenge type show
that he's a host of something like that.
You think it will work?
Just competitive drinking?
Yeah.
Of course it'll work.
International Federation.
Okay.
I don't know.
It depends.
It depends on what, I think wrestling, yes, acting is going to be tough.
I don't think he would be great as an analyst.
Probably not.
I don't think that's calling anything crazy here.
You should just run this guy over, huh?
Yeah.
Right.
I don't think he wanted, he would want to do that.
I think he'll, he'll probably be successful though if he goes into wrestling or like
it's an action hero.
I think he, yeah.
He could be an action star.
Yeah.
Even Seagal.
Exactly.
Braun first, even Seagal is the movie we all have been waiting for.
Yeah.
He's really, you know what happened?
He saw Apollo Creed or what was the most recent one that came out?
Creed 2?
Yes.
Yeah.
He saw that and he was like, I could be a boxer in one of these movies.
Yes.
And so yeah, you can be an action star and not have to deliver that many lines.
Yeah.
Like it's, it's not that difficult of a job.
You just hold a big gun and then you say like one cool thing per movie.
Rob would be awesome.
He's got it.
He's got it.
All right.
So any other thoughts on Gronk, Hank?
I think it's more likely that it'll come on the show now too.
Yes.
True.
Good point.
We've been trying to get him on for a while so someone please get Gronk on the show.
Also Gronk pretty fucked up.
You didn't let Leroy break that.
Yeah.
You should have just done it.
No.
You should have, you should have just done what every other journalist did and just screenshot
his Instagram post and then post it on Twitter as if you're like breaking the news.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He didn't do the notes app.
That's, it's not official if it's not on the notes app.
Yeah.
Good for him.
So you're right.
He might come back.
Good for him for keeping it kind of like close to the vest and not letting someone else
ruin it for him.
Seriously.
I think he just realized that it was a, it was Sunday and he was like, oh man, I don't
want to go to work anymore.
Yeah.
So I'm just going to.
It's funny.
Did you see JJ Watts tweet on Saturday?
Yes.
He was like, there's nothing better in the world than accidentally figuring out that it's
a Saturday when you thought it was a Sunday.
Now I get a whole another day tomorrow to relax before my weekend's over.
And I was like, dude, you play professional football.
Yeah.
Every day's the weekend right now.
Yeah.
You don't, this is the off season.
Right.
You don't have to go to the office on Monday morning.
This is great.
Yeah.
This is like, this is like us when we complain about having to go to the office.
Exactly.
Like, hey dude, you're a blogger.
You can show up whenever.
Yeah.
True.
Good point.
All right.
Let's do who's back in the week.
Hank, give it to us.
My who's back.
I have a few.
Johnny football is back in a big way.
Oh yeah.
You guys remember that?
AAF.
AAF.
Yeah.
Ah, so he signed with the Memphis whatever's and he led them to an overtime today.
Victorious.
Yeah.
Memphis whatever's.
I changed the screen saver on my phone, the background on my phone.
It was Zach Mettenberger and now it's Christian Hackenberg.
Nice.
He was also mic'd up.
He was like talking shit.
It was, it was classic Johnny football.
Yeah.
Another chance.
Uh, the, they should name it the Memphis whatever's.
They should just do it all based off that.
Yeah.
The Orlando who cares.
The Orlando somethings.
Yeah.
Arizona.
Arizona.
I forget.
Yeah.
The San Antonio, uh, the Texas team.
Yeah.
That's a team.
Not the other one.
That one.
Uh, Motley Crew is also back.
Oh.
Back from the dead from the 80s.
They put out a Netflix movie, which I don't know.
I know like, uh, the, whatever, Queen Bohemian Rhapsody won all the awards.
This was like a 10 times better of a biopic movie.
All sex drugs rock and roll.
I didn't really know much about him going into it.
It's a great movie.
Yes.
What's your big takeaway from Motley Crew?
What's your favorite song in their catalog?
Uh, Girls, Girls, Girls is a banger.
Yep.
Uh, problematic now.
Shout in the name of the devil.
Women, women, women.
Um, respect, respect, respect.
My main takeaway was probably that heroin is bad.
Yeah.
Good point.
Don't.
He six died.
He died first, like six minutes.
Spoiler.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, no, everyone knows that.
He died and then he came back.
Yeah.
I didn't know that.
I thought he was dead.
I was like, oh fuck.
Rock and roll Jesus.
He said he was doing heroin like through a garden hose basically.
I think that they're all still alive.
Like they were absolutely like, they like just partied seven days a week in the mid-80s
and they're all still alive.
Yeah.
And Tommy Lee, you asked us if we were big Motley Crew guys and basically PFC and I
incidentally were like, well, we saw Tommy Lee take his cock out and honk the horn of
that boat.
We fucked the hands and so on.
So yeah, you can say I'm a pretty big, if you're a child of the nineties, that was
the video.
Yeah.
They're an interesting band.
They're one of those bands that like, uh, I feel like they didn't even really try to
write good songs.
They were just like, we're going to write a song about sex.
Yeah.
And then they just wrote a song that's like, I love fucking.
Yeah.
Look hot and just like, you know, do screeching guitars and then Tommy Lee comes in and his
drum upside down.
Yeah.
From the fucking ceiling.
Yeah.
They're like, that's the show.
Maybe doing all those drugs is good for you if they're all still alive.
I mean, look at Keith Richards.
Interesting.
Nobody's done more drugs or drank more whiskey than Keith Richards.
Yeah.
And he's healthy as a horse.
Or like David Bowie.
Yeah.
Exactly.
Healthy.
Like he's sober and like he's never been, well, I think that's part of the deal is like,
if you party like those guys, you have to get sober at like 45 for the rest of your life
to catch up.
Yeah.
For the rest of us.
Yeah.
I'd say it's worth it.
Yeah.
For sure.
Is that it?
You done?
That's it.
Okay.
That's it for Hanks.
All right.
My who's back the week is the Spice Girls.
Oh, yeah.
If you want to be my lover.
That's right.
So they're doing a comeback tour.
Good.
Very good.
All of them?
Yep.
Admitted in an interview that she slept with Ginger Spice.
That was her name, right?
Jerry Halwell.
Oh.
Nice.
Spice.
Back in the day, they slept together one time and Jerry is not happy that Mel B is putting
her dirty shit out there.
Damn.
So the reunion might not happen.
I don't know.
We'll see what happens.
Kind of awkward.
I'm really looking forward to going to that concert.
Yes.
Absolutely.
Were you a big Spice Girl?
Nope.
Okay.
Hang on.
Do you want to be my lover?
Do you like the movie?
Spice World with my friends.
I've been dating them.
You didn't know the Spice Girls existed until now?
The Cheetah Girls were more my era.
If you want to.
You want to jump.
Zzzz.
Zzzz.
Zzzz.
Uh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
Duh.
She never comes for free.
She's a real lady.
That's me.
Oh, you'll see.
Summit up and down and why.
And he's all around.
Summit up and down and why.
is commercials that we hate.
Yes.
Orange Vanilla Coke.
I had that in my head for 48 hours.
I really wanted to try Orange Vanilla Coke.
Fuck Orange Vanilla Coke.
I wanna try it.
And guess what?
Fuck that Phil guy too.
I am so sick of him not telling us stories
about his player days.
It pissed me off.
This is like-
And they stole our Goldfish pit.
And they sold it.
Yeah.
An octopus, right?
Actually kind of like Paul the octopus,
rest in peace, who picked all the World Cup games
correctly in like 2010.
This probably doesn't like have anything to do
with the commercial or the product that he's advertising,
but an octopus would be really good at wiping their own butt.
Like there should be a toilet paper company that has,
yeah, that has an octopus as their-
I like that.
I like that.
Very hygienic.
Paul sucks when you watch, I don't know,
however many hours of TV we watched this past four days,
like 77, 98.
I was thinking about that.
I don't think that we're giving ourselves enough credit for it
because if we're watching two games at once,
we should count those as separate hours.
Double.
Yeah, so we probably-
Or three if you're like Hank and I would have three TVs.
Yeah, there you go.
So I mean, we were in the sports book on Thursday,
but we're out there,
we're probably taking in like every hour that we watch
is actually 12 hours of television in this sports book.
I agree.
So we're probably pushing like a few hundred hours.
In Orange Vanilla Coke,
I saw seven million times and I hate it.
I will never drink an Orange Vanilla Coke.
I'm canceling Orange Vanilla Coke.
I'm actually, I think the advertising is working for me.
No, I want to try it.
It worked too much that I'm pissed off about it.
Wait, can't you get that in the Coca-Cola freestyle machines?
I don't know.
Ask Chrissy Teigen.
Oh, Chrissy Teigen.
They just invented those.
So you can make your own freestyle.
All right, let's get to our interview with Paul Bissonette,
biz nasty before we do that.
A quick word from our friends at Body Armor.
We were drinking Body Armor all weekend long.
Body Armor is the new official sports drink,
the NCAA March Madness.
It's been keeping everyone going
throughout the kickoff of March Madness.
I was drinking the strawberry banana.
I woke up on Friday morning, slept at a sports book,
woke up Friday morning.
I hadn't been outside in 36 hours,
but I had my Body Armor and that's how I survived.
So the players are drinking on the sideline
as you know, we've been drinking it all
throughout the tournament and we'll continue to do so.
I'm telling you, go get the strawberry banana.
It is delicious.
They have a ton of different flavors,
but I'm telling you right now,
strawberry banana is the best.
So thank you to Body Armor for keeping me alive.
They kept me alive all weekend.
Body Armor, go check it out.
Okay, here he is, Paul Bissonette, biz nasty.
Okay, we now welcome on our good friend, biz nasty.
Do you actually, are you starting to regret
the biz nasty thing as you get up in age?
Yeah, I mean, imagine being 50 years old
and you're walking the street
and someone's like, what's up, biz nasty?
And your gate's like, yeah, check please.
Yeah, that's a tough one.
I guess big cat's no different.
Like eventually I'm gonna get to a point like, all right.
That's less douchey than biz nasty.
Yeah, that's true.
All right, so biz nasty is on.
He is one of the three co-hosts of Spit and Sheiklitz,
the most popular podcast in Canada.
Fact.
Really?
I think so.
I'm pretty sure.
Sports podcast, sports.
No, no, everything.
Well, that is, yeah, that is like politics for Canadians.
Yeah, hockey is, yeah.
So let's talk college basketball.
What do you think about March Madness?
I think that you guys gambling,
the amount of money you guys do is fucking nuts.
Okay.
I don't, I mean.
We just made it to 60 minutes though.
You're about 60 minutes.
Come on, yeah, we got that residual check coming in.
The quote was literally,
I love gambling and then Davis goes, it's the fucking best.
And that was it.
Yeah.
Still got it.
Yeah, facts only.
I just don't know where you go
from betting 30,000 on a game to after that.
What's, I mean, what's gonna get your blood boiling next?
Yeah.
That's a good question.
What are you doing?
Yeah, yeah.
No, it's true.
Dave definitely like, as soon as he retires
from gambling for the season, he's gonna just go,
it's the old Ray Leota at the end of Goodfellas.
When he's like, I'm just,
I'm just eating egg noodles and ketchup like a schnuck.
That's what your life, your life has no excitement.
It has no juice.
And think about how hard you guys work for your money.
It's not like you're some trust fund, babe.
You guys got to grind it out, be on the road all the time.
Like when's the last time you took a shower?
I mean, you know the answer to that question.
I don't, I take baths.
You look like a greasier version of Post Malone.
Yeah.
I think that's actually the meanest fucking thing
that you could ever say about everybody.
Oh really?
You said some mean shit to me.
You said, you could call me Caldeflower Nose.
I have.
Ooh, you said that.
Which was a pretty good one.
That was the first time I'd ever heard that.
No, because Post Malone is like the most
greasiest looking guy already.
He looks like he stinks worse than garbage.
He looks like a New York City street.
Yeah, I actually smell good, I think, for the most part.
You always smell good.
I was saying that beforehand.
You always smell good.
I can say that, because we're friends.
Like, I can just be like, hey man, you smell great.
But if you were gay, I wouldn't care.
If that's what you're insinuating.
No, I'm just saying I like the way you smell.
No, I appreciate it.
No free ads.
It's a mosque, I'm not gonna say which company.
It's very cheap.
It's keels.
You can figure out the spelling yourself.
It's a little bit of a doozy.
I own the products and have for many years.
I didn't know how to spell it.
All right, let's talk actual hockey.
Sure.
Because you don't want to talk March Madness.
I just don't know anything about basketball.
Do you watch any basketball games?
I know that I liked what SVP had to say about it.
Yeah, you're just a fan of coaches' berating players,
just in general.
No, I mean, there's a line and he didn't cross it.
Like, he's not a Bobby Knight status.
Right, right.
Like, and mind you, that was a different time.
He was more old school, but even for those times,
like he was, he basically assaulted players.
Yeah, he literally did, yeah.
Didn't he choke somebody out of things?
Yes, and so did Woody Hayes in Ohio State.
But I actually wrote that down.
This is the only thing I wrote down
is I wanted to get your thoughts on it.
As a former professional athlete at many different levels,
you had probably, how many,
you probably had fucking 50 coaches, right?
Because you were up and down from the minors
and all that stuff.
I would say professional coaches.
I would say probably in the 15 range.
Okay.
Maybe less because I didn't hop around from team to team.
But you went from the minors.
So I had a coach in junior, Mike Stothers,
and I ended up having him when we won the Calder Cup
in Manchester, so I was reunited with him.
Far and above the hardest coach I've ever had on me,
and I love him like a father.
He would put us down when we were playing bad
and we'd watch video and he'd berate every player.
But he would bring it to that line
where he wouldn't cross it.
Right.
But you were like, fuck, I just, I want to do better.
And he challenged you, yeah.
And there was some days where I'd go home
and I'd have higher anxiety than others.
And you know, some days I would shit my diaper
when he was really losing it on me,
but it turned me into the person I am today.
Like you have to go through things like that.
You have to battle through adversity.
It's not always going to be easy.
And if you want to be coddled,
it's going to be a very tough life ahead.
Did you ever have coaches on the other end of the spectrum
that were a little bit more, you know,
maybe they just were a little softer around the edges,
talk to guys more instead of yelling at them?
Because I think that's really the biggest point
of the Izzo thing is, I have no problem with what Izzo did.
I think there's multiple ways to coach.
And it's the coach's job to find the way
to get the most out of their guys.
And so that problem, they probably have a preexisting
relationship that goes, that's a very deep relationship.
And he knows the right buttons to push
to get the most out of his guy.
So for us to just jump into it,
and just assume what he's doing is wrong,
maybe he mentioned it before tip off
and five minutes into the game,
this guy's making that mistake where he's like,
yo, what the fuck are you doing?
I don't know what happened there.
It doesn't look great when it's on national television
and he's just braiding a player.
Some people bring in the fact that like,
this guy's making four or five million a year as a coach,
maybe even more.
And these guys are student athletes,
not making a penny, but to take that out of it.
And going back to the question you asked,
if I had a coach that was on the other side of that,
yeah, I wouldn't name names,
but there was no accountability in the dressing room.
And you'd see certain guys make the same mistakes
as other guys that weren't being held accountable
like the other guys who were making them.
And it was a fucking gong show.
And that's why we were losers.
And stutters would actually go at the older guys
and the guys who were established.
And then the young guys would kind of be sitting there
like this and then they would leave the room.
And he knew we could take it too.
Like I would, you know, he would say,
you don't fuck you, me and you know,
what the laser pointer and like, what's this?
And, you know, I'd, you know,
I'd once he left the room, I'd say,
fuck that was a pretty nice PBWACA boys
and everyone have a little giggle and then you go back
out there and you get it done.
I think it happens all the time behind the scenes too.
It just so happened that the cameras caught this
and it was so public and it did look like
he wanted to fight him a little bit.
Like he was getting physical.
He was up to that point where he was like going
after the guy and had to be,
he was the one that had to be restrained in this situation.
But I'm sure that same exact shit happens
in every single locker room.
It's just usually not in front of a camera.
Yeah.
And one thing from the fan perspective is the amount
of pressure that on these athletes and coaches
on an everyday basis, when every move you make
is being scrutinized, there's so much tension
that accumulates up in your body,
no matter if you're the coach or the player.
And sometimes you just end up aligning into another guy
or the coach as me, the player,
where both of us are at peak, we're rattled.
Right, right.
And it just, and then it just comes together
and then it's something like that.
Have you ever seen a coach actually get physical
with a player?
Actually, when I was in junior,
one of our coaches was just fed up with the player
and he poked him in the chest.
He kind of gave him one of those
and then the player ended up making a spectacle of it
and the coach actually ended up getting fired.
Really?
Yeah.
Doug Lidster was the coach's name
and he was a great guy.
It just, it was what I was playing with,
the sag and the spirit.
I felt bad for him.
The player completely over-exaggerated.
He flopped.
He dove?
He flopped.
He flopped.
Right.
He cried wolf and the fans kind of knew it all gone down
and then the truth came out and it was a shitty year.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, well, I guess it also, like what type of coach,
that guy probably didn't have the relationship
with the players.
That's what I always just assume.
When a coach gets that much in a guy's face like that,
like Izzo, he probably has so much,
he's so much built up respect and trust both ways
with his players that those type of moments happen
and they can move on and they get better.
He fucking called the play for that guy
right out of the huddle.
I love that when coaches call a guy out
and they say, all right, you're up.
That's the way to do it every time.
Did the player talk about it after the game?
Yeah, he said he had no problem with it.
Yeah.
And then former players of Izzo's kind of came out,
like Dremont Green said that this is how Izzo operates.
He loves the kids and he's trying to get the,
I think it's a very fine line to try,
if you're a coach and you're berating a player,
you're doing it publicly like this,
it's a very fine line between losing the locker room
and actually doing something that's gonna motivate the guy.
I don't know where it is all the time.
You have to know from player to player,
like, oh, I can push this guy's buttons.
I can't do the same thing with this guy
that I do with that guy.
Certain guys are way softer than others.
Regarding the player aspect of it,
as I said, I would love when it would get called out,
but you gotta put the guy right back out there.
And yeah, you gotta know which way to,
how far you can push it with each guy.
All right, let's talk some hockey.
What's going on with the, we're winding down.
We got like five, what, five games?
Most teams have like five to eight games left?
No, is it, yeah.
Coyotes just played their 75th game today.
They lost to Long Island.
So the Coyotes are fading.
They just had a four game Eastern swing.
Okay.
Where they played two games in Southern Florida
and then they played New Jersey and Long Island.
They only got one point.
They were buzzing before that.
It was a tough road trip.
They've had a ton of injuries this season.
They are only right now one point out of a playoff spot.
And you still work for the organization?
I do, I do.
And they have, the fate is in their hands though.
They have Minnesota and Colorado.
Those are two teams that they are competing
for that wild card position with.
And they have them Minnesota at home
and they have Colorado on the road.
So if they win those two games,
it will be very close
and they'll have an opportunity to slide in.
The West is a shit show.
I'm looking at it right now.
It's a total shit show.
Cause we were talking before,
like the Blackhawks had a moment there
where everyone was like, oh man,
they could actually get sneak into this thing
and they just keep losing to teams they shouldn't lose to.
And then you look at the entire West
and there's no compare, especially compared to the East.
There's just no like dominant team.
There's just kind of a clusterfuck of middling teams.
Yeah, the straw that broke the camel's back
was probably that Philly loss.
You were talking about that before the interview.
The Philly loss, yeah, three to one on Thursday.
Yeah.
I'm partially to blame for that.
Really?
Well, I live bet it.
We were at the sports book.
I live bet the Blackhawks 1-1 with 10 minutes left.
And I kid you not, Biz,
as the guy was handing me the ticket
for my live bet on the Blackhawks, the flyer scored.
And the price just completely touched.
And then you had March Madness and it's just been a show.
Yeah, it's just like, come on.
I'm down a significant amount.
I looked at my count today.
You're looking at your laptop.
I believe Chicago does have a game in hand.
Yes, yes.
Two games in hand to some of these teams,
which is fucking weird.
We'll play the game right now.
I wouldn't count them out.
Okay.
I know they can run the table.
It is a waste of Patrick Cain and Jonathan Tate's prime,
especially with the year that Cain has had,
but that's neither here nor there.
I don't know if he's gonna win the heart
just because they don't make playoffs,
but he's definitely gonna be top three.
Now is this the year that Canada
is gonna win a Stanley Cup again?
Ooh, cool.
I'm looking at the teams in 100 years.
Calgary and Winnipeg are the only teams who have a shot.
I don't think that Toronto's gonna be Boston first round.
Yeah.
So no there.
Also, I mean, they got the Caps in the East.
And historically we've dominated them.
That's true.
The last two years.
Although I do have an eerie feeling
because Boston's getting very cocky online.
Have you seen all the tweets?
We had some talk just about that
because Hank actually did a great job as a producer.
Let us know.
We had no idea what was going on.
He's like, hey, Biz has gotten into it
with Brad Marchant, not gotten into it.
Oh no, I think it's hilarious.
Yeah, so what's going on?
Explain the story.
Oh, he's just been a lot more vocal online lately,
stirring the pot.
Mitch Marner's a guy who's up for a contract
with the Toronto Maple Leafs.
And you guys know Austin Matthews signed that huge ticket.
Well, Mitch Marner's kind of outperformed him
as far as points are concerned.
So he's going to be expecting the same type of money.
So Marchant just stirring the pot goes,
that Marner's quite the player.
Can't wait to see what kind of contract he gets.
And so it just gets Toronto media and an uproar
and then Marchant just sitting there like, you know.
The ultimate past.
He's a past.
He's being a Sean Avery, right?
Burns, what's the guy from Simpsons?
Yeah, Mr. Burns.
Yeah, Mr. Maw.
Yes, I love it.
Yeah, so out west Calgary,
tell me what I need to know about Calgary
because I don't know shit about the city
or the hockey team in general.
So I just know they're really good this year
and a lot of smart hockey people,
like your co-hosts have been talking about them a lot.
But why are they a good team?
They just have a deep lineup, especially up front.
They made a few good trades in the off season.
They got that Lin Holman from Carolina.
He's been lightened it up with that top line there.
Johnny Goodrow.
Of course, of course.
You know Johnny Goodrow?
Johnny Goodrow, yeah.
One of the most.
He's French guy, right?
No, he's from New Jersey.
Okay.
He's like as Guido Sarducci as they come.
I was at the Calgary Stampede.
And he went up there with a bunch of buddies
from New Jersey and a couple of his teammates.
And you know, he's a celebrity in town.
So they made him ride in the parade
and he's on this like horse
and he's got like Gucci shoes on
and like Gucci belt and like unbelievable guy.
Man rocket.
He's, I wouldn't put him in man rocket status.
If we're right,
you can't just keep throwing that around and everyone.
How many man rockets are there in the NHL right now?
Top five.
Is it just like a rotating cast
or it can only be five man rockets?
No, there's been a few up and comers.
There's one with Arizona who,
a guy was,
I think he resides in Florida in the off season,
Jacob Chikrin.
Okay.
And fuck, who do we have?
Oh, so we had Matthew Barnaby on the podcast today
and he said his daughter's going to ASU and I said,
hey, I'll watch her back.
Make sure no greasy hockey players are going after her.
And he goes,
I just need you to watch out for that Chikrin
because he's just a man missile.
Yes, a man missile.
I like that.
I like that.
Why don't they fight in the playoffs?
Just fighting is dead in hockey.
No guys are doing it.
It's just, I don't know.
You know what the problem is,
is all these social justice warriors
have kind of taken over
and directed the league in a certain way.
I feel bad for like league officials
and just anyone who has to work at the league office
because it's just a constant barrage
of people bitching about everything.
Really?
People are bitching a lot about fighting?
Well, listen, there's the consequences from it.
Right.
And yeah, it's just like every time there's a,
every time we post like a fight on spit and chicklets,
you always got a few people like,
how are you promoting this?
It's just like, I don't know
because it's fucking, because it's violence
and I'm okay with two guys having a nice Donnie Brooke.
Right.
You know, like always.
So wait, what else are they complaining about?
Like a, like a concussion protocol, that sort of thing.
So a lot of these people who haven't played
and don't understand the speed in which the games played at,
especially nowadays,
anytime it's a guy who remotely comes up a little bit,
even though he's still on his feet
and he hasn't jumped.
Like Tom Wilson's a guy that gets,
even if he throws a clean hit sometimes,
just cause he's a bigger guy,
people want his head on a platter.
And you know, I know he's crossed the line a few times
and you know, that's going to happen.
The game's fast.
He's expected to play physical.
So it's just, they scrutinize every play.
And another thing with hockey
is it's just gotten so much faster.
I mean, we just had Andy O'Brien here
with Sydney Crosby's training
and just the evolution of the sport
as far as the technology is concerned.
These guys are moving around out there a lot faster
than they were 20 years ago.
Same goes for basketball.
Yeah, football, yeah.
Any very similar.
So calls are going to get missed.
And you know, I know people don't want to hear me
take the ref side on sporting events,
but I feel bad for these guys.
And now people have the voice.
So any missed call, people are just bitching nonstop.
Right.
You know, these people.
No, I agree with you.
It's the same thing kind of with football
where we get to a point
where we analyze every single play.
And at some point you're just going to have risks
when you're talking about contact sports.
And you're going to have guys get injured
and you're going to have big hits.
And sometimes, you know, what may look like
in super, super slow-mo as targeting
is really the receiver in real speed.
The receiver ducked his head at the last second
and the guy wasn't even trying to go helmet to helmet
and it ends up happening.
Yeah.
And you can't really take like those type of things
out of the game.
You can try to minimize it as much as possible.
Has hockey done a good job of like minimizing those things?
Well, and going back to what you just said,
it's difficult when the fans in media
have a voice in changing rules
that guys who have been doing it their whole lives.
And all of a sudden they're like,
are you fucking kidding me?
Right.
Like Darren Revells telling me
how to make a fucking hit, a tackle?
Right.
I just had to throw him in there.
Yeah, you had to.
Now, we always talk about like playoff speed and football.
Is there a difference?
Is the game faster in hockey and the playoffs?
Way faster.
Why don't they just play faster in the regular season?
It's a combination of just adrenaline
and knowing that this could be your last few games.
And I mean, you got to pace yourself a bit
and once again, we have Andy O'Brien
who's Sidney Crosby's trainer in here.
And you can even tell he's methodical
both the way he approaches the season
and how he exerts his energy.
He's not gonna go for a 50-50 puck
the way he would game two, the way he would in playoff.
Guys diving in front of pucks.
On the defects of the lane down.
Like that doesn't really happen
in the regular season.
Does that actually hurt?
I feel like it doesn't hurt as much as it looks like
because you got all the pads.
No, I would rather take punches to the face
and have to block shots as a career.
My best friend, Boyd Gordon,
was a notorious penalty killer, shot blocker.
And this guy was having his equipment altered
because he would break his hand
from blocking a shot on his hand.
So he'd have an extra pad put on it and he'd keep playing.
And then next thing you know,
he got hit in the ankle
and then this bone right here swells up.
You got to remember, they got to get their feet in skates
and these skates are solid.
So now he's got to get his foot shot up
before he plays every game, that's animals.
Because there are times like you'll have,
what are you gonna say?
I was gonna say, you know best
with watching Nicholas Jarmelson.
He, I mean, first of all, Nicholas Jarmelson is like,
if you see him in a suit,
you're like, that guy is, he works for like Accenture.
He's like 170 pounds and not like a big dude.
No.
And then he gets out there and yeah,
it's possession after possession.
And then when they're blocking pucks,
like he would just get in front of a million pucks.
And by the end of the,
by the end of like a Stanley Cup run,
I don't know how these guys are standing.
He, yeah, he's a psychopath.
As I said, I'd like to take punches to the face
rather than block shots.
I was one of those guys where like,
I just didn't like doing it.
And like sometimes I would flamingo.
What's that?
Like, you know when like the pucks come in
towards your ankle and you're like,
and you kind of like move your foot,
they call it flamingoing and hockey.
So you get back to the bench and like the coach would be like,
nice fucking flamingo.
We're gonna start blocking shots around here.
Fucking pussies.
And then he come over and slam a chair over my head
like Bobby Knight.
Thank you for coaching me.
And you're like, I love that coach.
Yeah, it's great.
You got the most out of me.
What's the deal with the handshake lines
at the end of Playoff Series?
Are you guys actually saying like good game, good series?
Or are you like, fuck you, I hate you.
Some guys have had issues shaking hands in the line.
Oh, remember when that's discussed.
No, no, don't ruin this for the people.
No, no.
It's why it's hockey's the greatest sport.
No, no, there's plenty of players who respect each other.
And you know, I've been on the winning side
and the losing side.
But probably the most notable one that I can think of
was Sean Avery and Martin Broder.
Where Martin Broder wouldn't even shake Avery's hand.
I got a 50 minute like little documentary thing.
I spent a day with Sean Avery and like the shit
that he would say to guys on the ice.
I was like, whew.
What kind of shit?
Just like fucked up shit.
Like stuff to where you're like, whew.
So you take Marty Broder's side on that one?
I mean, yeah, I would never cross the line like that.
Some guys just generally don't give a fuck.
But yeah, some guys will bring guys'
personal lives into it.
Yeah, yeah.
That to me, I don't go there.
How's your speaking of personal life?
How is your feud with Judge Judy going?
What happened recently with her and someone tagged me in it?
I think she signed another deal
where she makes 50 million a year or something in a month.
That's right.
She's got more money than God.
Her bailiff makes a shitload of money too.
I think he gets like $100,000 an episode or something like that.
Her bailiff could buy and sell you.
Yeah.
So she changed bailiffs at one point, right?
There was one beforehand.
Could you imagine that person retired the worst time?
It's like, what's his name?
Pete Best, the guy that was in the Beatles?
Yeah.
Well, no, he probably got fired because Judge Judy
is such a diva.
Yeah.
Should we remind people of the story?
Yeah, you hate Judge Judy.
I always didn't like her just because she's just so rude to people.
She is.
And even the nice ones, she'll be like, shut up.
Shut up.
And you're just like, you asked them to explain what happened.
I play with a guy named Sean Backman.
And he lives in Connecticut.
And apparently she lives nearby in whatever state.
And he went to get pickup food from this restaurant
that she was walking into to go sit down with her family.
Well, he had a ball cap on because he was just there to get takeout.
And she walks in and she goes, take your hat off.
And she took it off his head and put it in his hands.
And he froze up.
But he knew I hated Judge Judy.
And I brought it up in the locker room.
And then he's like, oh, I got a Judge Judy story.
And then told me that.
And then I'm like, there was a chance.
What did you do?
Did you sock her in the face?
Because she technically assaulted you by grabbing you.
And he's just like, no, I froze up.
And I couldn't talk to him for a week.
I was so infuriated.
I needed to go take my CBD capsule.
I needed to go get a massage.
I had to get the incense going.
We need to go live in her town for like a week
and just never take your hat off.
Yeah, just wait for it.
Just set a trap.
Yeah.
That would be a good documentary.
The sting.
The hat sting.
Fishing for Judge Judy.
What would you say?
I would have two hats on.
Yeah, second takeout.
One off.
She's like, I have not prepared for this.
And then a mini one.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
A yarmulke.
It's like those Russian things that get smaller and smaller.
My hats get smaller and smaller.
Yes, I love that shit.
I mean, you might need the video for that to make that money.
I have one last question for you.
It's a C-key question.
Promo code take, you get $10 off.
Go to Playoff Hockey Game.
OK.
Will you be traveling with the team?
This isn't the C-key question.
Will you be traveling with the team if they make the playoffs?
I don't know yet.
Who's the guy you keep dancing with?
This also isn't the C-key question.
Bob Heathouse.
He's been the radio.
That's his name?
Heathouse.
That's his real name.
Bob Heathouse.
Bob Heathouse.
Bob Heath.
Yeah.
Fuck yes.
No, it's, I believe it's pronounced heathias.
Oh, we know it's called Bob Heathouse.
So I call him, no, actually, it is pronounced Bob Heathouse.
It's spelt like Bob Heathias.
So I call him like the heat monster, heater, fire flames.
Hito.
Yeah, yeah, cheeto.
Hitospito.
Yeah.
And so, you know, the nicknames progress.
Uh-huh.
Bob Heathouse returns for his 18th season as a member
of the Coyotes Radio.
That's amazing.
We couldn't be more polar opposites.
This guy, you know, grew up in Michigan,
went to Michigan State, and just like the nicest
human in the world.
And, you know, he's married and just, you know,
lives a very quiet life.
And then here you got me, you know,
telling kill stories on the pod about getting my,
you know, girl sucking farts out of my asshole.
And it's like, it's.
In Heathouse?
No, no, like, you know, he, you tell him.
Sometimes, yeah, sometimes I talk to him and tell him stories,
you know, and he kind of giggles.
And, you know, you know, he enjoys it,
but he would never like, he would never give one of his own
because he's just such a wholesome, awesome guy.
Right, right.
All right, so my Seeky question.
Give us some hockey lingo that we get.
You always have great, you know, words.
What are you guys going on now?
Flamingo's pretty good.
I like that one.
Flamingo's good.
Oh, that's our dinner.
Oh, that's okay.
Yeah.
I don't mind.
I wouldn't give you a hard time about that.
Even the last time I was on my phone,
you gave me a hard time about that.
Well.
You were, you were, you were like on Hinge, though.
You were like sexting.
You were sexting during the interview.
This isn't necessarily a hockey one,
but I was telling this one on the podcast today, too,
the Spit and Shakel's podcast.
Quick shout out.
We had this girl in high school.
I went to North Bay to play junior my first year,
and there was this girl.
She was very cute, huge tits.
Like, you know, the one girl in high school,
we were like, this girl's 100% in her breast reduction
at some point because her back's going to get scoliosis
in no time.
And she had this Michael Strahan gap in her teeth,
and I just couldn't get over it.
I used to have a gap, too, before my teeth got knocked out.
Before you got punched enough?
They, it punched your, you don't need to know
what the Donets in Canada, you just came to fights?
Yeah.
Well, my front four are fake, right?
Mm-hmm.
And so we used to call her Gappy Guns.
Oh, geez.
Which I thought was a, which I thought, no, it was,
I thought it was an awesome nickname.
You got to brace that.
Gappy Guns?
I got Biz Nasty.
Yeah, Biz Nasty's tough.
Oh, the guy's calling again.
Oh, one of the, one of the guys, uh...
What other, what other lingo we got going?
Like, you guys create lingo.
I feel like every other, every other podcast.
Yeah.
It's, it's just hard off the top of my head
to think of something.
Come on, man.
This is what being a guest on a show is.
I know.
Jesus Christ.
The Adderall's wearing off.
Ooh.
Give me a nickname for a hockey stick.
Okay.
So I gave you one in the episode, in the midst of it.
I don't know if other sports use it,
but like when you go into the, the coach's office,
when you're maybe not playing bad,
and the other guys can hear him scream a little bit.
Yeah.
And like, and you come out and they're like,
how was that peep-y-wack?
Peep-y-wack.
Peep-y-wack.
Peep-y-wack.
I also liked you calling a big contract a ticket.
Oh, yeah.
Signed a big ticket.
Yeah.
And also a big ticket.
It's the dressing room.
Yeah.
It's not the locker room.
I think we said this on the last one, like, uh,
like, uh, a couple sheets.
Like, what's he make here?
Oh, a couple sheets.
Couple sheets.
How much is a sheet?
A few sheets.
Million.
Oh, okay.
So people would ask me and I'd be like...
How many sheets you got?
Any sheets?
Do you have one sheet?
Does it sound cool?
I, like, like, my net worth?
Yeah.
Yeah, I got a couple.
I got, yeah, I got a couple sheets.
A sheet and a half?
I was smart with my money.
Couple sheets?
I would, uh, is it, is it due sheet to talk about your,
your net worth?
No, now you're just saying sheets.
Like, no one knows what we're talking about.
Is that like, uh...
I got four wah-wahs.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
You got six iced teas.
No, not six.
I said, I said my goal and I'm, you know,
I'm smart with my money and I invest in a bunch of
different ways.
Um, I said once I get to 10, you'll never see me again.
Oh, yeah.
Did you know that if you Google, uh, Paul Bisonette net worth,
the first people also ask is,
how much money did Ryan Whitney make?
Ooh.
Oh, he's made, I bet you...
He's made a lot of sheets.
And, uh, Whit comes from a good family and,
and his mom's a realtor or, or was,
I don't know if she's retired now,
but he made some very good investments early on.
He's doing very good.
So does he just take random vacations during the season?
I have never met,
I haven't had a vacation in two years
because, you know, I just like working and...
That's a situate thing to just take a lot of vacations all the time.
Your life is also just kind of a vacation.
Fuck off.
Yeah.
I mean, you guys grind, but I mean,
it's, it's kind of funny because part of our podcast,
this humor is him going on these rich person rants,
where he's complaining about how he got a private boat on his,
trip to Turks and Caicos,
because he didn't want to scuba dive with the rest of the civilians.
And, uh, his kid was crying the whole time
and they ended up paying the guy 1500 bucks
to take him out on the water.
And he literally scuba dive for, for like four seconds.
When the wife's like,
Hey, we got to go.
This kid won't stop crying.
So, you know, a quick 1500 bucks
and he's complaining about it where people,
that's their mortgage, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He has thoughts and prayers to him.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So let's, so we're going to set up a GoFundMe
and we're going to, we're going to get money back.
Yeah.
Okay.
I liked that.
What's up this summer?
You got another documentary planned?
I think we're going to put that on hold.
You're just going to steal half of the video footage
from the Canadian tourists.
Yeah.
We're going to, you're going to get the stock footage
in there from, from Toronto and Ottawa and all that.
It's like a genius idea.
Create a documentary and just use the tourist board
to tape half of it for you.
Well, part of the goal is to show off
how beautiful British Columbia was.
See, that's the part where you say that, that's genius.
What are you, what are you talking about?
Yeah, I mean, that's a genius thing.
I know.
Oh yeah, we're, it's actually,
we're just trying to show off the beauty of Canada.
I know.
I mean, if, I don't know if whoever's seen it,
who listens to you guys,
probably like 1% of your demographic.
Yeah, I think people saw it.
It was great.
It was my first ever film project.
I learned a lot about being on both sides of the camera
and what, you know, what things need to be shot
and how they need to be shot.
So it was a good learning experience.
You know, I'll probably look back in 10 years
and I'll be cringy as,
just as much as the people who commented on the bottom
how cringy it was.
I thought it was great.
It was good.
So fuck the haters.
Hey, you got to start somewhere, boys.
You got to take your lickings.
You're going to fail sometimes.
And you guys know it like everyone else.
What's that supposed to mean?
Well, I'm saying, has there ever been something you did
where you're like, fuck, that didn't work?
No, everything we've done is working.
Well, there you go.
Okay. Well, Hank, what about you?
Two Man Tuesday.
Ever heard of it?
Yeah.
Marshall Vantar.
Hank nails everything.
Yeah.
Yeah, we've had a few mistakes.
Car stick.
Do you guys want to talk about Hank dodging the cat bomb?
Yeah, well.
Let's talk about it.
Yeah, he dodged it.
By a point.
By a point.
Would you have actually gotten a cat?
He has to.
Yes.
Can you tell how disappointed they are?
I think Hank probably would have,
someone would have killed Hank if he didn't get a cat.
Yeah.
Like actually murdered him.
Our listeners hold us accountable.
I feel like you lose a lot of credibility
and even their brand, if you don't end up getting a cat.
True.
I would have got a cat if they lost.
I'm a man of my word.
You still might have to.
Yeah, I'm a man of my word.
If they lose, I would have got a cat, but it's not going to happen.
I think a good middle ground would have been
making your girl sleep at like a hotel for a month
and then living with the cat, just you and the cat,
documenting it and at least giving it fans.
Yeah.
Yeah, that kind of thing.
Because you want to make sure that you bond to the cat.
How bad would it be if the cat bonded
to somebody else in your house?
That'd be a big time cuckoo.
Did you not see that tweet that come on the cat tweet?
Yeah, this guy had to backtrack
because one of his old tweets got dug up from.
How confused are you on the internet on a daily basis?
I can't even keep track of what goes on at Barstool.
Yeah, I'd imagine you log on and you're just like, what?
What is this?
I said colored, what did I say?
Colored people or something like that.
My mom's half black and we're talking about Jerome again
and we're being very complimentary.
And sometimes you're just talking
and you start tripping over yourself
and you're trying to get out an articulate thought.
And does that make sense?
Yeah, you did a great job.
That was actually pretty good.
Yeah, I have a seizure over here.
The biggest word you've ever used.
And this lady came after me like saying how outdated it is
and basically that I'm racist.
And I'm like, lady, my mom's half black.
Like maybe I misspoke, but like just take it in context.
We were pumping the guy's tires for.
Yeah, when you take a lot of things out of context.
We had a comedian on a couple of weeks ago
who was just basically like saying,
he got in trouble a few times in England.
It's like when you take things that are said
and just put them like write them, transcribe them,
they always sound different.
Wait, so I couldn't help but notice
you didn't deny ever coming on a cat.
Yeah.
Have you ever came on a cat?
Never came on a cat.
By accident?
No, not into the animals.
How can you be sure that a cat's never had your come on?
Like what, underneath you?
Um, okay, time out.
We were on the topics of comedians.
Yeah.
And I want to ask you guys if you saw that Jim Jeffery's thing
that just got dropped.
No.
Where he went and interviewed a guy who, you know,
maybe has some, some, Paul.
Careful.
Yeah, yeah, I'm stuttering on myself.
I don't know what you're being careful about.
But, you know, he had some, some strong opinions
about immigration and, and rightfully so.
Some people think differently than others, right?
But he was very respectful about it.
He brings up good points.
And Jim Jeffery's had a sit down interview with him
and just completely manipulated the tape.
But the guy was smart enough to know
that Jim Jeffery's was going to do it.
So Jim Jeffery set up his video.
And when he got into the room,
he put it on the bottom, um, like on a chair
so you could see what was happening.
So Jim Jeffery's and his crew completely manipulate
where the questions and answers were like intermixed.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, right.
Where, so it was making him sound like a racist asshole
where he played the, what really was said after.
And he just, like...
Oh man, Jim Jeffery.
Listen, I liked him as a comedian.
I fucking totally lost respect for him.
It was a, it was a, it's a bad look.
Yeah, so we're going to do that with you
and coming out the cat.
Yeah.
Which, by the way, you deflected from again a second time.
Um, should we get into the, you know,
what would it cost you to fuck a cat?
I mean, like, I'll go...
It sounds like you want to tell us...
A couple sheets?
How many sheets?
Let's ask Hank, if somebody said, and keep in mind,
nobody would find out about it in the general public,
only your close buddies.
Because obviously, Peta would come after you
if you were, you were a Ben and a Cat over there.
I think it would be more than Peta.
Yeah, just, I think everybody,
I think everyone would be like, hey, why'd you fuck this?
They'd be leading the way.
But if no one was to find out...
A couple sheets.
Except us.
Well, you would find out.
Two million dollars, and Hank would fuck a cat.
Raw dog, too.
You can't know, no condom.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Do you have foursie?
Do you have foursie on the end there?
You put some sheets in front of my face
so we can have this conversation.
It totally changes it if you have foursie or not.
There used to be pornos of, uh...
Oh, actually.
Wait, no, what?
No, there used to be pornos
when girls used to get fucked by horses and stuff.
Oh, come on.
And, uh...
This is now...
I know who you're talking about.
This is very much dressing room stuff.
You're very, um...
You're a filmmaker.
You're familiar with the film, Equus?
I know.
So there's a guy that used to fuck horses
or let horses fuck him.
He died.
And he died because the horse railed him out too good.
Yeah, internal bleeding.
Yeah.
Oh, I know.
I just knotted so hard.
Oh, biz knows.
That's my uncle.
Or was.
All right, Pete.
All right, that's the perfect way to end.
Hey, we've surpassed cats.
We're onto the big guys now.
Yeah, yeah.
All right, biz.
Thank you.
Appreciate it.
Oh, I love coming on your show.
Yeah.
And cats.
And cats.
Love coming on cats.
I teed you up for that one.
That interview with biz nasty was brought to you guys
by my favorite restaurant in the entire world.
It's Buffalo Wild Wings.
How are you spending your March this year?
Where are you watching the tournament?
Are you streaming in your office?
It's the greatest sporting event on the planet
and you're stuck watching it in a work hole?
Or worse, you're watching all alone
in your silly boy cave.
Come on, when did that nine to five become nine to life?
The big dance wasn't made for the tiny screen.
So quit your job or call in sick or call in and quit.
Just do something.
Just leave.
Just leave at lunch and never come back.
Have them miss you.
Follow the tribe to be dubs
because dunks, buzzer beaters, wild upsets, game winning threes.
This isn't the stuff of the water cooler.
This is stuff of cold beers and wild wings,
as in Buffalo Wild Wings.
Are you going to watch with Ken from accounting
or are you going to watch with 100 screaming savages
and way too many giant TVs and beer and wings and nachos?
And all the things a rabid sports fan needs.
Let's do as our fancesters did.
Get rabid, get heated, bear hug a stranger,
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Buffalo Wild Wings, check it out.
It's got the PFT seal of approval as my favorite restaurant.
Just favorite place.
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Go to Buffalo Wild Wings.
The interview is also brought to you by Bud Light,
our favorite beer's back, Bud Light,
and it's the must drink beer of college basketball.
For all our 21 and over AWLs out there
throughout the rest of the college basketball season,
Bud Light wants to hook up the award-winning listeners
with some sweet swag so you can look your best
when cheering on your teams for March Madness.
All you have to do is tweet at part of my take and at Bud Light,
take some pictures of you drinking some sweet sweet BLs,
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and send you PMT and Bud Light swag bags.
So it's so easy.
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you take pics of you drinking the Bud Light,
and then you tweet at part of my take and at Bud Light
with hashtag Bud Light Busters,
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So Bud Light Busters, we busted out.
We're not going to Vegas.
The party's still happening.
That's fine, but we can still drink all the Bud Lights
that we want from here in New York.
I had one before the show that you couldn't tell.
Hell yeah.
All right, let's do some segments.
First up, we got to stay woke.
I got to stay woke for you.
I want to throw it out there.
Hit me.
Antonio Brown.
Yes.
Have you peeped his Instagram recently?
He has been very active on Instagram.
Very active.
So active, I don't think he wants to be an Oakland Raider,
and he's trying to convince himself
that this is the good move and that he's happy
because every other post is just him in Raider's gear
being like, God's plan, this is awesome.
Here's me with John Gruden.
Here's me awkwardly going to Derek Carr's house.
Here's me training with my Raider gear.
All this stuff.
Here's me creating a Madden game
where Derek Carr throws me a touchdown
because that probably won't happen in the regular season
because Derek Carr's not very good.
I think Antonio Brown is secretly like,
this is kind of a bad deal.
I really wish I had gone to the 49ers of the Patriots
and now I got to convince myself that I love being a Raider.
Interesting.
It's like the people that you follow on social media
that post a lot of pics of their relationship that they're in.
Yeah.
It's like very carefully staged pictures
of them both looking super happy
and you've hung out with that couple in real life.
Right.
And they're just like, they don't talk to each other.
They're always on their phones doing weird stuff.
Or the Instagram model who posts all these perfectly cropped
pictures and then one day she's like, has a meltdown.
She or he has a meltdown like, this is actual reality.
Like I have fat days too.
It's like, yeah, no shit.
We always knew that.
You didn't have to tell us, but it was clear
that this something was up because everything was perfect.
You might be onto something,
but he might also just be trying to bury
all the old pictures of him with a gold mustache.
Yeah, that's true.
So it's just over posting to get those,
like to scroll way, way down for those.
Good point.
All right.
So that's an alternate theory.
But either way, something's up.
I wouldn't be shocked if he demands a trade
within the first six weeks.
That'd be amazing.
I really hope that he does.
He's like, I'm out.
Somehow, like this off season,
him and LeVion Bell have managed to turn Big Ben
into a sympathetic character almost,
like people are feeling bad for Big Ben.
It's like that, that's expert level spin zoning on his part.
Impossible thing to do.
Impossible thing to do to make us feel bad for Big Ben.
All right.
Next up, we have a sorry not sorry.
This is for Robert Kraft.
So he released the statement and said he's sorry.
For embarrassing everyone?
Why did he embarrass everyone?
What did he do?
He said, I'm truly sorry.
I know I've disappointed my family,
my close friends, my coworkers,
our fans and many others who rightfully hold me
to a higher standard.
What did he do?
Did he get in trouble for some?
We'd hold on, let me look.
He didn't include anything.
Nope, he's just saying he's sorry.
Sorry.
Just in general.
Just a big blanket, sorry.
I like it.
It's a very strange move to apologize
for a crime that you didn't commit.
You're right.
That you're trying to say that you did not commit.
Yeah, it's like the OJ book.
Like this entire thing is like if I did it,
the OJ thing.
If I nutted by Bob Kraft.
I'm looking for the person who got jerked off
every day of my life and I won't rest until it happens.
I'm going to find the real ejaculator.
It's the videos coming out.
Oh, yeah.
Are you ready for it, Hank?
Yeah.
Okay, great.
I can't wait.
Hank's actually excited to watch it.
Are you going to like,
is it like when you watch like a concert at home
and you like get into it really good?
Are you going to jerk off with Bob Kraft?
Probably.
There's also no chance.
Like it was funny that he posted a no tap.
Like there is no 0.0% chance that like Robert Kraft knows
what the no tap even is on his phone.
Yeah.
Like zero.
True.
True.
Well, we know that Cam Newton's not going to find himself
in any situation like that because he said on Friday
that he's no longer coming.
He gave up, he gave up coming entirely.
Isn't he, didn't he like make a,
wasn't there a little asterisk that he's going to still have sex
but not come?
He's basically going to do the sting thing.
Tantric.
Tantric.
Yeah.
It just never comes.
I don't, I didn't see that up comes.
Yeah.
Or he could be like Arnold Schwarzenegger where he's always coming.
Just his life.
All the time.
Yeah.
Every time he buys it.
Well, he also said he went vegan for a month
before he gave up coming.
And when you think about it,
giving up coming is the most vegan thing you can do
because you're saving millions of sperm every time you don't nut.
True.
So Cam Newton, how's this going to affect this?
You know, it'd be really upset about all this stuff.
Vegan and no coming.
Billy football.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So that'd be very, very, very, you have to come.
Your body needs to get rid of it.
No, it's toxins.
You have to do it.
What if one of those sperm grows up to be Hitler?
You've got to come.
Oh man.
All right.
Next up, we have a LeBron Blames.
So LeBron James physical therapist put out an Instagram.
Then immediately deleted it.
And basically the Instagram said LeBron had such a severe injury
that he should have been out six months, not six weeks.
And he's never seen anyone work harder and then deleted it.
And that was for his pretty much broken groin.
Yes, pretty much broken groin.
Classic LeBron.
Yeah.
I just put it out there, let everyone know that he actually was dealing with a way worse injury,
but then have it deleted and have it all be from his physical therapist.
So it seems like he told her like, hey, take it down.
I don't want to make excuses.
No.
But in reality, like this was the ultimate excuse, just a very well-planned excuse.
Right.
And also it was way before that he didn't say take it down.
He said, hey, can you post this real quick and then delete it right now?
No, that's what I'm saying.
But in his mind, everybody thinks that he slid in behind the scenes was like,
hey, I don't want to make excuses.
Yeah.
Hey.
Listen, you know, it is what it is.
But I'm a team player.
I'm not trying to make this about me.
Right.
I'm not trying to make this all about me.
Just make sure you turn it into my new show coming out and also Space Jam 2 and The Barbershop.
And it's not about me.
It's about the team.
Also the first letter of every word in that caption.
I actually wrote it down and it said fire Luke Walton.
Yeah, exactly.
That's what it added.
I was going to say someone else from LeBron's campus definitely going to post an Instagram
and be like, Luke Walton was the real problem all Laker season.
He mistreated everyone.
He doesn't know how to call play.
Then boom, delete it.
There's been a lot of talking about another man's job going on recently in LA.
A lot of people are talking about
Luke Walton's job.
Recurring guest Jason Kitt is rumored to be the next guy.
Yes, that's right.
Which would be even better than Luke Walton.
Well, like if you can't, why not hire a really bad head coach that we have like
actual statistical data to back it up?
Yeah.
Get Prunty in there.
Yes.
This is, Prunty could actually run the show.
He could turn around.
Prunty would be a perfect coach for LeBron because he's not going to get in anyone's way.
He's just going to show up.
What if he moved out to LA and became Hollywood Prunty and like frosted tips?
No.
He just will show up.
He's there for his benefits.
He just wants to get his day.
He wants to go see the dentist and like, that's it.
Like he doesn't, he doesn't have to call any plays.
He doesn't have to run any practices.
Bron, your team.
There you go.
I'm just Joe Prunty.
Yeah.
But no, there's, there's a lot of names linked to it.
So Jason Kitt, obviously I heard Tai Lu.
Now is this you or LeRoy?
LeRoy.
Okay.
Heard Tai Lu is linked to the job.
No really good coach is going to want to go there though.
No.
Jason Kitt is like the top of the list that you can get.
And he's not good at all.
Right.
Right.
Phil Jackson, we said it.
Yep.
Or just have, just have Rich Paul coach your team.
Phil will coach the team if he doesn't have to actually be there.
He'll coach from Montana.
He'll coach from Montana.
Yeah.
Unlike a landline.
Yes.
So just call in different plays.
All right.
Last up, we have Monday reading.
This is a special one because we're going to do Monday reading
Mike Francis's Twitter account.
Huge, huge news.
Well, there were a lot of rumors that we're swirling on Saturday.
Huge news.
Yeah.
So Mike Francis on Saturday tweeted out,
due to the outrageous misinformation and outright lies that continue to be reported
and the constant request for me to comment, I will make a statement here.
I was really hoping he was going to deny coming on a scat.
I did not come on my cat.
I never, I never came on my cat.
This was tweeted at 320.
His follow up tweet was 615.
Yeah.
I was, I mean, I was constantly refreshing that feed.
I put alerts on.
Oh, that's smart.
Yeah.
He made us all wait three hours after saying everyone has been asking for a statement,
so he will make his statement here.
So what, do you think he fell asleep?
Absolutely.
He took a nap for sure.
He falls asleep mid tweet.
He wakes up and finishes and types press send.
And then his, the big statement that everyone was waiting for
was essentially just like about his contracts that no one cares about.
Yeah.
So he was saying, yeah, go ahead.
Yeah.
My deal with WFAN is simple.
My deal with enter com is complicated.
It involves WFAN radio.com.
The Mike's on app, CAA, DraftKings and a few other concerns I have long term offer from
WFAN.
I haven't signed it.
Thanks.
That's great.
And then he said, I've told the company if I stay, I would consider adding another person
to the program.
My idea.
Nothing can be done in that area without my approval and nothing has been done.
The Mike's on app and its business relationships are important and must be considered.
Of course.
And then he said, this needs to be decided quickly for enter com, which has been
accommodating WFAN and the broadcasters it might impact, would like to have it done before
the first meth losing streak.
You might be already late on that.
Yeah.
MLB season started last week, right?
Yeah, right.
So who knows.
Yeah, they haven't won a game yet.
But yeah.
So I'm glad that he cleared up all those vicious rumors that were going on about the business
relationships between the Mike's on app and the other concerns.
It's a contract he hasn't signed, but has always been out there for him to sign.
And that he came up with the idea to have a co-host.
He invented co-hosts.
He invented co-hosts.
Mike Francis, in addition to daily fantasy, has invented co-hosts.
My idea.
And then later on, on Sunday, he said credit to CFU, the noted CFU, Central Florida University.
So after the game against Duke.
Yes, he said CFU.
CFU has to be second.
This guy.
I love him.
He is.
He was one of those guys that I didn't know existed really until I moved up to New York.
And it was like a thing.
Right.
And it's awesome.
I now am a Francesca stan.
Yeah, you're a mango.
Is that what they call him?
Yeah.
And we also are like on the very tail end of his career.
So we only get, we're getting like the Jordan Wizards, LeBron Lakers, Francesca.
Like it's all just kind of falling apart.
We're just watching this all combust in front of him.
And I'm glad that I'm a noob because I feel like the long time fans, the long time mongos,
they're just kind of like numb to this.
And right now it's like, it's so new to me that I find it just full of wonder.
I didn't do anything.
Three o'clock on Saturday.
I didn't move.
Not because I was watching games, but I was waiting for Mike Francesca's follow up
tweet.
The vicious rumors that continue.
Everyone has been asking me to comment.
I don't understand any.
I understood less about the situation after reading those.
Yes, exactly.
I was like, he made it way worse.
I never fucked a cat.
That's just what he should have said.
Entercom has been asking me to fuck a cat, but I have not signed the deal.
Here ended the tweets.
All right.
That's our show.
We'll see everyone Wednesday.
Hopefully, hopefully we'll have the Duke Slayer on.
Coach Buzz Williams.
That's what they're calling them.
Yeah.
We're going to try to get the Duke Slayer on.
Hank, you survived today.
What's the deal by the way?
We need to clarify some people.
I think you have to win the sweet 16 and then you have to not lose by 10.
You have to not lose by double digits in the elite eight.
Otherwise you're getting a cat.
That might be fully correct.
That is fully correct.
And if they win by double digits in the championship,
you guys get blue hair and head tattoo.
Yes.
Neck tattoo.
I forgot about the neck tattoo.
Yeah.
I'm still on the table.
I'm cool.
Yeah.
No.
If Duke wins the national title, we get Duke's head tattoo.
Did you notice that Zion in the game today, he was having such a hard time
solving the puzzle that it is taco.
Yeah.
He just, he didn't know how to attack him.
It was just a big mountain that he couldn't get around.
Yeah.
And he tried.
He tried many times.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
All right.
Got to be worried.
He kind of hurt his ankle a little bit.
So that's true.
This is making real fun.
Jump, right?
All right.
Love you guys.
Yes.
I'll be gone in a day or two.
All the things that you say, and you realize them.
Just blame our love reason why.
You're all the things I've got to remember.
You're shining away.
Well, I'll be coming for you anyway.
Take on me.
Take me on.
I'll be gone in a day or two.
I'll be gone in a day or two.
It's part of my take presented by Bar Stool Sports.