Pardon My Take - Mark Titus + Anthony Davis Traded (Maybe, We Just Put It In The Title)

Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, ad-free, on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we have our friend Mark Titus on the show, College Basketball. We are living after football, so we're doing College Basketball talk. We're going to talk a little NBA. We're going to also clean up the NFL Super Bowl, Parade season, all that stuff. We have Bachelor Talk, and because it's Wednesday, guys on chicks, before we get to all of that,

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Starting point is 00:01:26 Okay, let's go. Bye! Bye! Now in the street there is violence, and then a lot of stuff will have to be done. No place to hang out or wash in, and then I can't live all on the sun. Oh, no, we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then

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Starting point is 00:02:15 we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to

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Starting point is 00:02:32 and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down

Starting point is 00:02:40 to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then

Starting point is 00:02:56 Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're

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Starting point is 00:03:20 to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then

Starting point is 00:03:36 Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're

Starting point is 00:03:44 gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue,

Starting point is 00:04:00 to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue, and then we're gonna run down to Electric Avenue. probably filled with fireball.

Starting point is 00:04:19 Yeah. Or maybe for Loco. Yeah. He was just trying to class up. Yeah. For Loco's won, right, guys? Yeah. He was, what else did we have from parade day?

Starting point is 00:04:27 Oh, the fight. We had the fight. There was like a big fight with all these, see, this is the problem with Boston getting all these parades. It's like if you're in training camp with your own team for a long time, you start to fight each other. Yep. These guys have too many parades.

Starting point is 00:04:38 They want to hit somebody else. Yeah. What else, Hank? Tom Brady made the catch of the year. Someone threw a football. He did like an Odell Beckham one-handed snag. It was unbelievable. Okay.

Starting point is 00:04:46 He did it all. He can make those catches in the big games where they count. There's a picture of Bill Belichick and there was like light shining down on holding him. That was actually a cool picture. That was insane. He looked like God. That picture was insane. Hank, why don't you recap too.

Starting point is 00:04:57 You were there, not at the game. You skipped the show to watch it on TV because apparently our TVs here don't work. What happened on Sunday night? So we, I had a ticket to the Super Bowl after party, but I was with like some of my friends from home who didn't have tickets to the after party. When I, and I told them, I was like, when I get in, I'll try and figure out a way to get you in. Whatever, whatever we got to do, we'll do it.

Starting point is 00:05:17 Butternight days. Ran, exactly. Ran into a certain boat, I'll say. Playportals. He was staying in the hotel and he had access to these passes to help get people in and he was nice enough to give them to me and I was able to run them back and forth to get all my friends in and none of them, it would have happened without the boat. That's why he's the best.

Starting point is 00:05:36 He's my hero. He was already my hero, but this was like, there was, we never, the security was so tight that we never would have been able to do it without him, but he had like an ultimate super, super clearance like pass that I was able to just run back and forth and he saved the night. I have a hypothetical question for you Hank. What major sport would you rather have win a championship next in Boston? Well, no, let me back that up.

Starting point is 00:06:00 Actually Boston Canada. If I were to ask you that question, very nice, before this NFL season, say I asked you that question right after the Red Sox won the World Series. Which team would you have said, would you say the Celtics or the Patriots? I would say the Patriots just because Brady's window is closing. So like the more, you know, he can get in before he retires, the better. Did you not hear Skip Baylis? Brady's sixth ring actually hurt his legacy.

Starting point is 00:06:20 It did. Because, because reasons, as the kids say, he was on one. What was his reasoning for that? That it wasn't like a blowout or he had to rely too much on his defense for it. Yeah. I don't know. You know what it was? It, this one was Belichick Super Bowl.

Starting point is 00:06:35 Yes. They should have given the MVP to coach Bill. The biggest winner from the parade is Max Kellerman because the Patriots were holding Haterade and different, like Max Kellerman pictures and punching the pictures in the face. If you're Max Kellerman, you literally, your whole entire life is to get to a point where a championship team like tries to shit on you and then you can say, well, I did my job. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:06:59 I was just a truth teller. That's the end of the troll cycle. You've just reached the final boss. Yeah. If you're punching a picture of your face, you have just completed the game. That is, it is a massive coordination. Like he's arrived at the Skip Bayless level. Yes.

Starting point is 00:07:12 Like, no, don't keep me wrong. He is, he's no Skip Bayless, but he is, he has arrived as like the professional sports screen. He made the leap. Yes. Yes. He made the leap. We're talking tier one stuff.

Starting point is 00:07:23 There was also the picture of a AWL. David Andrews, the Patriots center for this shirt off. Love it. Just look in shock as hell. Live in life. Yes. Amazing. Listen, dad bods are still in.

Starting point is 00:07:32 If you win a Super Bowl, you can just take your shirt off at any point and do whatever you want. You can just party for a couple of weeks. Whatever. If you're going to retire or not. That's exactly what Cronk should do. All right. So the Patriots, I don't really know.

Starting point is 00:07:44 Have we heard anything out of like the Rams camp? I guess we heard Aaron Donald said that he shut down Julian Edelman. That was, I mean, okay, but that's about it, but he won the Super Bowl MVP. Yeah. Sean McVay said also there was some, I need to clarify this because I did have a few people asking me. That Julian, a listener of the show, not sure if he listened to the, we didn't start the fire song.

Starting point is 00:08:04 Yeah. The line was Julie Edelman's a minch. Oh. Not bitch. I did not call him a bitch. So just clarifying that. Oh, interesting. He probably didn't listen because he was focused on it again.

Starting point is 00:08:13 He was focused on it. He was making hype videos. That's right. His hype video, as you pointed this out the other day, they are very well produced. He's addicted to hype videos. We're going to actually have him on the show in the next couple of weeks. I've had that contact with him and he is, I, again, I don't blame him. I'd be addicted to hype videos too if I was a professional athlete and all the hype videos

Starting point is 00:08:30 had me in them. Like you just basically get to make a hype video for yourself before every big game. That's sick. What do you think happens with Brady? Uh, well, first of all, Brady said that he didn't like being called the goat, right? Yes. He came out and said, which only a true goat would say. We got to feel bad for him because he said he'd rather be called trash than be the goat.

Starting point is 00:08:50 That's six round Tom Brady still in there. The inner Tom Brady. Here's the thing though. Goats eat trash. True. That's what actual animals do. That was the other great moment, uh, Tom Brady's like four year old daughter. How old is she?

Starting point is 00:09:02 She had a goat, uh, greater than a ram and it's like, Jesus Christ, there's talk. She stole that. She stole that from my blog yesterday. Oh, really? Yeah. Plagiarism runs in that family. So that's a super bowl. I don't really know what else.

Starting point is 00:09:16 I mean, we have the combine in a few weeks. So we'll pick up football again there, but for right now, when's the, when's the White House busy? I don't know. Yeah. Do you think Brady would eat any of the fast food? There will be some pieces written. I can assure you that.

Starting point is 00:09:30 Yes. There will be. There will. There will be many pieces and posts and posts. There will be posts. There will be many posts online. So moving on to Anthony Davis and the saga that is going on with the New Orleans Pelicans and the Los Angeles Lakers doing a little dance, a little Tetotet.

Starting point is 00:09:49 I don't even know if that's the right thing to say, but they are in trade talks. Now they're out of trade talks. Los Angeles has gotten out of the trade talks saying we don't want to be negotiating against ourselves and Anthony Davis, this is, okay, follow me along here, follow along here for a second. PFT. So this is the greatest orchestrated tampering that they're trying to make it look like it's not tampering that I've ever seen in my entire life.

Starting point is 00:10:14 Anthony Davis's dad came out and said, these are the teams we don't want to go to Boston was on it. Then he said, these are the teams we do want to go to. And it was like all these teams that won't, like the Knicks, what are the Knicks going to trade the bucks? What are the bucks going to trade outside of Yanis? You know what I mean? So it was basically a list of teams saying here, we'll go here, but the only reasonable

Starting point is 00:10:34 one is the Lakers. And then the Lakers offer all these pieces and then say, you know what, we're going to step out of this because you guys aren't playing fair. When everyone in the world knows that he's going to be a Los Angeles Laker, right? I think magic John hurt me when it comes back. Magic Johnson is probably just petrified of being fined again for tampering. Right. He's addicted to tampering.

Starting point is 00:10:53 Yes. He can't stop doing it. So he's in his mind, if he makes a trade offer, that might be construed as tampering. So he's like, he's made his, he set his piece and now he's waiting for New Orleans to respond at least with like a counteroffer of some sort. Basically it's going to be the entire future of the Lakers for Anthony Davis. But in the NBA, that type of shit works. That's smart.

Starting point is 00:11:11 And that's what you have to do. So yeah, I agree with you. I think him and Rich Paul, well, yeah, Rich Paul is involved, but I'm going to say like who else? Who are the other pieces going to be? Let's dig a hole deeper to the New Orleans. No, no, no, to the Laker. Who else is going to join LeBron's new super team out in LA?

Starting point is 00:11:28 So do I have a name for you? You ready for it? Carmella Anthony. Nope. I got a name for you. Ready for it. I'm just stealing all Hanks hotseats. Cool.

Starting point is 00:11:36 This is awesome. Kyrie, I'm going to give you a quote. If I want it asked if he could still play. If I wanted to, I could, but I don't want to. Kobe Bryant, he said that exact quote, which is so funny. No perfectly Kobe being like, oh, I could drop, oh, I could drop 40 if I wanted, but I don't. So Jason Whitlock's prediction about Kobe rejoining the Lakers from two years ago will

Starting point is 00:11:58 come true. I could, I could, I could get in shape, but I don't want to. I could. That's basically, I mean, Kobe, it's just such a Kobe quote being like dangling it like, hey, I want to, if they need me, I could get out there. I could do it. Yeah. And then the real treat is the, the little like cherry on top of this tampering Sunday

Starting point is 00:12:15 is we finally get LaVar back, LaVar ball back in the news. So that is the reason why this trade is basically done in my eyes because LaVar ball coming out of the LeBron contract, however much money LeBron is paying LaVar to stay quiet. Best boy grip on space jam too. Right. So LaVar is now out and saying he's a fluffer on some, he's a, he's, he's LeBron's fluffer. He's a fluffer on face jam. Yes.

Starting point is 00:12:40 LaVar comes out of like the rock he was under silent for the last six months. Now saying he wants Lonzo to go to Phoenix. He doesn't want him to go to New Orleans, basically fucking the whole thing up. And that just tells me the trade's been done because LaVar knows he no longer has to worry about LeBron paying him his hush money. Yep. I agree with that. Like he, this is all of a sudden happening because he was dead quiet.

Starting point is 00:13:04 And now he's back. Yeah. LeBron was dog walking him for a while. Now he's outside barking again. So the sons actually would be interesting because then LaVar would try to get all of his sons on the team. Yes. So he would just say that it was named after him.

Starting point is 00:13:17 The sons. The LaVar sons. He also told, was it Mello, the one that's playing overseas right now? Uh, I don't know where they are. Mello's in high, back in high school. Okay. In Ohio. Okay.

Starting point is 00:13:28 So well, Jello, this is not, he's a free agent, I guess is what his technical term would be. Okay. So I guess to the high school game, LaVar told everybody not to go to his son's basketball game the other night because his son wasn't going to be playing. So he's just like, everyone, if you're thinking about supporting this high school, don't come out to the game because, because my boy's not playing. So the whole thing's a mess, but it's going to get figured out by the trade deadline on

Starting point is 00:13:48 Thursday. Yeah. I actually think that the NBA is a better league when LaVar balls at like just barking around. Oh yeah. It's way more excited. It's petty words. Hey, this league guys, this league, I actually do love the NBA, but it's, it always takes

Starting point is 00:14:02 me a few days to like get into the basketball mindset. Even though I'm still watching, but like once you get out of football, I got to figure out a way. It's, it's, it's like basically being out at sea for a long time. I got to get my sea legs. I have a confession to make. Yeah. I watched replay of the Super Bowl last night.

Starting point is 00:14:18 You did? I watched the replay on NFL network. Yeah. Trey Wingo would be very upset. We'll get back to that in the segments. No, he'd be happy. You happy? Yeah.

Starting point is 00:14:27 Yeah. Well, unless you know, he would smoke me out. He'd be like, bro, let's, you know, let's just fucking do it right now. Trey Wingo. Just chill out, man. Just chill out. He's friends with Trey Wingo and he'll probably hear this. We're bruhs.

Starting point is 00:14:36 We're bruh. Bruh. That was me taking a big hit Trey. You know what that's about. So Trey is, he went out of control. Well, he lost, he lost his mind in the biz. We call that being passionate big cat. He was passionate about the fact that some people didn't like the Super Bowl when actually

Starting point is 00:14:56 they should have liked the Super Bowl. Yes, exactly. Shut up. Just shut up. If you don't want to watch, then don't watch. Go watch the Raptors and the Knicks. Go do something else, but don't sit there for four flipping hours with your eyes glued to the game and say, oh, this is so boring, but I can't stop watching.

Starting point is 00:15:15 Oh, it's so boring. Just shut the hell up. Oh, okay. I mean, give me a break. If you don't want to watch it, then don't watch it, but don't watch the game and sit there and go, oh, I hate it. That's the worst. And you people that did that, you're the worst, the absolute worst.

Starting point is 00:15:32 Yeah, Jerry will tell them, I don't want to hear any of that garbage. If you don't want to watch the game, don't watch the game, but don't sit there and watch the game and say, oh, I'm so bored, I can't take it anymore. Give me a break. Are you doing my bong hit? I'm going to take a hit. Noise. Oh, that's mine, dude.

Starting point is 00:15:50 I always do that bong hit noise. Just stall it. There's no fucking... There's too much water in that thing. Yeah, and there's also like... There's no... I didn't know that you invented doing the fake bong hits. No, but I've done it like many times on the show.

Starting point is 00:16:00 Okay. I was just like, I don't know. I don't make a Hitler joke. Okay. You actually have... I did. I would actually say that you've made more than the last... I've rebranded Hitler in the last six months than I have.

Starting point is 00:16:12 To my guy? Yeah. He's no longer your guy? Yeah, you swaggerjack Hitler from me. All right, so Trey Wingo, just chill out, man. He loses his mind, says you can't watch the game and also complain that it's a bad game because then you should just stop watching. Huh?

Starting point is 00:16:26 Mm-hmm. Yeah, I don't know. Just chill out. Just get back to the stepbrothers' references. I don't... He should have... He should have been more positive about it and said to everybody that sat there with me and watched the full game, did we just become best friends?

Starting point is 00:16:40 Let's go do karate in the garage. I don't... Look, I actually kind of agree with this point that we should never complain about football. Yes. But like, Twitter's basically meant for people to complain. My favorite part about it, though, was the voice that he was like, but I didn't like the game. That's what people sound like when they complain about it.

Starting point is 00:16:58 I didn't like it. I didn't like it, Trey. Oh, man. My favorite part of the rant besides that voice was Gola just staring at him the whole time. Yes. Just most... Trey, we like you, but just be yourself.

Starting point is 00:17:11 That was... That wasn't you. Just maybe switch off the sativa. You... It's giving you too much energy. Yeah, you need to... You need to just chill it. Back to the indica, Trey.

Starting point is 00:17:19 Yeah, just chill out, man. All right, let's do hot seat cool throne. Ready for it? Hank. Want to go? My hot seat is Carmelo Anthony. Oh. Not because of Kobe Bryant, but because of Jabari Parker.

Starting point is 00:17:32 Go on. The Lakers, according to ESPN's Brian Warnhurst, the Lakers have discussed trading contiguous Caldwell Pope to the Bulls for Jabari Parker, which would then essentially be the Mellow, no defense, forward position. So Carmelo's just going to probably stay out of the league. Is Jabari still thick? Yeah. Okay, good.

Starting point is 00:17:50 And he also refuses to play defense, but admits it so I can respect it. He said it before the season. That's right. They don't pay me $20 million to play defense. That's right. So he's basically just a younger Carmelo? He is a little bit. Yeah, he's got the...

Starting point is 00:18:02 He can't score like Carmelo in his prime, but yeah. Why don't they get them all? Collect them all. All the guys that don't play defense. Carmelo hasn't been in his prime in like 10 years. They should know what they should do. Bro, that's Mellow you're talking about. Come on.

Starting point is 00:18:14 Stay Mellow. Here's what they do. So they're looking to get rid of Luke Walton, right? He's definitely on the hot seat. Oh, yeah. So you bring in Carmelo. You bring in Jabari. You've already got LeBron that doesn't play defense.

Starting point is 00:18:26 Maybe... Oh, you got Rondo, who's not a big defensive guy. Then you... Well, when he wants to play off Rondo, which is the best thing ever because it's like... He basically is doing the Randy Moss I play when I want to play. Yeah, then you get Dan Tony back and Steve Nash and you just run the Sun's offense from like the mid-2000s. Yeah, seven seconds or less.

Starting point is 00:18:44 Love those Suns. My other... I'll say it was Edelman, but you took that. My cool throne is John... Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, it's okay. I forgive you. John Wall.

Starting point is 00:18:53 So he tours Achilles. All right, so my hot seat is John Wall and the Wizards. So the Wizards have... They owe $171 million to John Wall in the next four years. $171 million. It seems like a lot. It seems like a lot. It seems like a lot of money.

Starting point is 00:19:09 Now we're not accountants, but it seems like a lot of money. And he tours Achilles mysteriously at home doing what? He slipped and fell. Yeah, he was washing his car. Who was that that tore their Achilles by saying they were doing that? But actually, they were playing basketball. It seems... Well, it'd be funny if he did it while playing basketball, because he hasn't been doing that

Starting point is 00:19:28 for the Wizards this year. It's outside of his contract. He's not allowed to play basketball under the conditions of his basketball contract. So here's my question. You guys, at what point will we find out what actually happened to John Wall? I think once enough people make really lame wall in Washington in shutdown jokes. Once he gets sick of hearing all those on The Tonight Show, then he'll probably just be like, just stop.

Starting point is 00:19:51 And now I admit, I was fucking, I was fucking on my stairs. This is going to be... Let's just hope he wasn't like snowboarding or something or something that wasn't in his contract, because $171 million to have that Nolan Void if he was doing something he shouldn't have been doing. Yikes, that would suck for him. Maybe. He was doing Oli's in the driveway.

Starting point is 00:20:08 Yeah, there you go. Bradley Beale came over and sliced his Achilles like in Red Sparrow. The Wizards, the Zards are a mess, $171 million, takes four years. If you can't get a wall to work in DC, just start sending in Tank. Just Tank. Add in Laugh Track. Hopefully that'll be the one that gets him. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:20:28 All right. My other hot seat is Marlin's Man. Did you guys see that the Marlins are aiming, it's the report, Marlin's aiming to boost the attendance by improving in-game experience. They're holding auditions for an in-game host, public address announcer, anthem singers, and Marlin's Mermaids. Marlin's Mermaids. Huh.

Starting point is 00:20:49 Interesting. So they're just basically taking Marlin's Man's ideas, he better sue, and I have an additional idea for the Marlins to boost the attendance by improving in-game experience. Maybe get some players. Oh, that's, yeah. It seems like, it feels like they skipped the first step, like, hey, we want to make it a really fun atmosphere for fans. We don't want to pay anyone and actually put out a professional baseball team, but we're

Starting point is 00:21:13 going to get some women with big breasts and put them in the front row, which you already do. We have that in Marlin's Man. You have a one-man wrecking crew of a production company, and he is an event planner for every Marlin's home game on his own, and he does it for free, except for the $500,000 discount you give him on his season tickets. But basically for free, do you think Marlin's Man's litigious? You think he's the kind of guy who would sue?

Starting point is 00:21:35 No. Does he have any contacts in the legal profession? Oh, he is a lawyer. Oh, yeah. He's a very high power. They have made a very powerful enemy. He should, they honestly should just, like, basically, what was it, in-game auditions for in-game hosts, public address announcer, anthem singers, and Marlin's Mermaids.

Starting point is 00:21:55 You essentially just need to give a live mic to Marlin's Man during the game. That covers everything. He can cover everything. He can do it all. Yeah. We're also looking to purchase a giant statue to put in center field, so when somebody hits a home run, everybody thinks they're on acid. Oh, man, I'm going to miss that thing.

Starting point is 00:22:10 It's going to be weird. Yeah, no, it is weird. I actually liked it. One time I see a highlight, like when the Cubs go play three games in Miami, I'm going to be like, man, and then I won't think of them for the rest of the year. Yeah, with the amount of home runs you're going to be giving up this year, you might as well have some sort of fanfare every time it happens. Yes.

Starting point is 00:22:26 All right, my cool throne, billionaires, because Howard Schultz. You stole mine. He says that billionaires should be referred to as people of means or people of wealth. I actually had my hot seat racism against billionaires, which is over now. Just be really nice to the people who have that much money. Let's use the right name, people of means or people of wealth. People of means should pay for their own f***ing stadiums. They should, yeah.

Starting point is 00:22:51 Bleep that out, too, please, because that's pretty offensive, but I actually had an idea about that the other day for billionaires that want, or excuse me, people of wealth. People of wealth. Yeah. Weans, if you want to combine them. People of means to pay for their own stadiums. Make it kind of like a crapshoot where both sides have a little stake in the game. Be like, tell you what, if you buy, let's say they're asking for like $800 million worth

Starting point is 00:23:15 of public financing, sure, buy $800 million worth of lottery tickets for the next drawing. And if you win, you get to keep all that and put it towards your stadium. I like that. And if you lose, tough break. What if we do it this way, too? We could just do a coin flip. The people of wherever, say the people of California or people of Seattle, because Howard Schultz, the best part about this is Howard Schultz ruin the Sonics, which is a proud

Starting point is 00:23:42 franchise. Shout out to Spencer Haas. But the Howard Schultz should basically be like, let's flip a coin. If I win, you guys pay for the stadium. If you win, I pay for the stadium, the most like a $1 billion coin flip. That would be sick. Who wouldn't watch? I would also like the lottery thing would be better if they're all scratch offs.

Starting point is 00:24:03 And he had to sit down and basically like Willy Wonka, hire a bunch of kids to just scratch it off. Exactly. I also like how Howard Schultz is running for president, right? Sure. Yeah, I think he's running for president. Is this the time in the, like I can always, I never remember what time of year everyone just starts running for president at the same time.

Starting point is 00:24:20 It was a couple of months ago. So Howard Schultz is running for president and he's running as a Democrat, I guess, but his whole platform is like, hey, do you hate egotistical billionaires? People of means. Vote for me. I'm an egotistical person of wealth. So I'm sure he's going to do really well. I'm sure this guy, Howard, when you think about it, only one out of our last 45 presidents

Starting point is 00:24:44 has been a person of wealth, which is disgusting. It's a great stain on our nation's history. So hopefully Howard Schultz can remedy that. I hope he runs as an outsider. That's what really gets me going whenever the outsider just call yourself a shitload of money. Just call yourself a maverick. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:25:00 Just be like, Hey, you know what, guys? I'm on the outside. People will be like, Yeah, you know what? He is. That goes for like literally every president we've ever elected has been an outsider. Was that your cool throne? That was my cool. Okay.

Starting point is 00:25:12 That's right. Then I piggybacked on that. We're doing like a fish jam right now. We're just going into, my cool throne goes into your hot seat. Yeah. It's all one song. Yeah. It's all one song.

Starting point is 00:25:21 My cool throne is hangovers. Go on. Because you're going to be hungover for a lot longer in New York City. The state health department just outlawed CBD being put in food or drink. What? So this was really nice. Like you could put CBD oil in a cocktail and get drunk again on a Sunday morning while curing your hangover and just mellow out on CBD.

Starting point is 00:25:41 So you're not allowed to do that anymore. They can't sell. Is weed still legal? Yeah. You can smoke weed on any corner here. Okay. Perfect. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:25:50 But not CBD. Someone gave me one of those hangover patches when we were in Atlanta and I don't know if it worked, but I convinced myself it did. I get really bad hangovers and CBD actually like does help with hangover. That's it. It doesn't do anything. I think you convince yourself. No.

Starting point is 00:26:04 We both convince ourselves. No. I've done numerous blind studies. Got it. I'm still battling a really bad championship hangover. Oh. Jesus Christ, Hank. I feel so bad.

Starting point is 00:26:12 Do you want to take a vacation? Yes. Can I? Yeah. My other cool throne is dead guys. Okay. So all the, well, dead rich guys. Zombies.

Starting point is 00:26:21 People of wealth. Yeah. He's a zombie rich guy in heaven right now. Ted Williams. Because no, his head. He's not dead. He's frozen. He's cryogenically frozen.

Starting point is 00:26:31 He's coming back. Did they like thaw out that freezer though? Like someone forgot to pay the electric bill. That sounds about right. It's like, oh, well, his head's thawed now. Yeah. Well, he's still bad. We still have it.

Starting point is 00:26:40 Yes. It's just. They just left it in the sink like it was a, like it was a steak. Yeah. It's just a little mealy. So yeah. This guy had a bunch of Bitcoin. He ran like a Bitcoin exchange or a Bitcoin wallet essentially.

Starting point is 00:26:52 Okay. He died with hundreds of millions of dollars in that wallet and he was the only one that had the password. So all of his customers that had that had invested in his Bitcoin service, their shit out of luck. So that guy's not dead. They can't retrieve it. He's not dead.

Starting point is 00:27:08 Well, I don't know. There's no way he's dead. There hasn't been a good fake death in a while. Did anyone go to his funeral? I don't know. There's no way he's dead. I sniff that out right away. He is living it high with, he's probably fucking whales with John McAfee in wherever the hell

Starting point is 00:27:22 they are. That's the dream, isn't it? Yes. Like you steal a bunch of money in cryptocurrency and you just go deposit your loads in a blow hole for the rest of your days. Yep. And there's like live life and then every now and then we share a super paranoid on some weird drugs, tweet a bunch of weird shit that go back to fucking your whale.

Starting point is 00:27:38 Yep. We're talking literal whales. Yes. No, yeah. Okay. Don't, no shaming. Okay. Let's get to our interview with Mark Titus.

Starting point is 00:27:46 It was a rough one. Yeah. I was about to interrupt. I'm sorry. But we kind of did this before the Marina one. So Titus has been a good friend of ours in the past. Was a good friend. Well, I think he's still, he'll probably come back eventually to part of my take.

Starting point is 00:28:00 Can't turn your back on him this quick. No, I don't know. Hank, that's what I'm saying. It was that bad. He will come back eventually to part of my take. I think he's still a good guy. We had our, we had our differences. You'll have to listen to the whole interview all the way to the end to figure out.

Starting point is 00:28:13 But like, it was a shitty interview and it's not, no one to blame, but Mark Titus. Pretty much. Okay. Before we do that, New Amsterdam vodka launched in 2011. New Amsterdam vodka was the fastest spirit brand in history to sell one million cases. New Amsterdam is a premium 80 proof vodka made from some of the finest quality grains from America's Heartland. It is five time distilled for unparalleled smoothness and filtered three times for a

Starting point is 00:28:40 clean, crisp finish. New Amsterdam vodka is slightly sweet on the palate, but you need to get it right now. New Amsterdam vodka gives 110% to make great tasting vodka and celebrates hockey fan stoolies who do the same, whether it's cheering for your team on game day, going out or chilling at home with your buddies. New Amsterdam vodka mixes well in any situation, smooth enough to drink on the rocks and mixes well with juice and soda or make a classic New Amsterdam mule. We actually were staying at the New Amsterdam house in Atlanta.

Starting point is 00:29:09 We were drinking New Amsterdam the entire week and it was awesome. Check it out. New Amsterdam vodka is the official vodka of the NHL and Barstool Sports thanks to our friends at New Amsterdam Vodka. We also are brought to you by Spotify. February isn't just about one super sized football game. On Spotify, there's thousands of free sports podcasts that agonize over the pre seasons, off seasons, and plain old regular seasons of nearly every sport imaginable.

Starting point is 00:29:40 Basketball, baseball, hockey, soccer, curling, and even hurling, yes that's a real sport. Now it's so easy to stay updated with the latest trade rumors, predictions, and scorching hot takes from some of your favorite games, biggest names, so take it one episode at a time and give 110% of your attention to the thousands of free sports podcasts on Spotify. But really we're talking about ours because the best offense is a good podcast. You can listen to us on Spotify, listen to your music, listen to us, do it all, Spotify has it all, and it is the best app for your phone. Okay, here he is.

Starting point is 00:30:12 I mean, it's Mark Titus. Okay, we now welcome on our good friend, recurring guest. It is Mark Titus from the One Shining podcast, great podcast. It is basketball season, football is over, we are ready to catch up on college basketball. Now I've been watching college basketball, losing a lot of money, so I have a fairly good idea of what's going on. But we have some questions for you and some, you know, things you need to fill in and none more important than my first question, should Brad Calipari's swag be illegal on a college

Starting point is 00:30:49 bench? I have a lot of Brad Calipari thoughts and, um, has the, yeah, man, like I know a lot of white guys that want to be black, um, to growing up playing basketball. This was, I mean, I dabbled in that for a long time in my own life. I see, if you go back and find any picture of me in 2004 ish that somewhere around that year, uh, I'm wearing double X everything because I, I was on a U team, I was the token white guy. I said, this is how I'm going to fit in.

Starting point is 00:31:21 I have never seen anybody take it to the level of Brad Calipari's. It's incredible. His face is amazing. Yeah. I don't know, I don't know who his barber is, but whoever hooked him up with that skin tight on the side, it's just, it's like goes on for it. It fades from Jess skin until like a fully grown, uh, like maybe like a number three at the top.

Starting point is 00:31:40 Yeah. So people who don't know Brad Calipari, obviously John Calipari's son, he, uh, re, is red shirting this year, which, whoo, thank God for Kentucky. They get another year of eligibility out of Brad Calipari and he's sitting on the sideline and usually when a guy sits on the sideline, it's a college dude, so he didn't have a lot of money, but this is Brad Calipari earned, not given, earned, not given. And so he was, he had one look where he was wearing like a, it was like a turtleneck. It looked like my Barstool Sports Advisors look.

Starting point is 00:32:08 Then he had the other day a half and half, uh, jean jacket, one half was black, one half was blue. And I just think that it's intimidating to have a guy like that when you shouldn't have that much swag on a college sideline, right? I want to know what the players think about him. Like I want to get an honest thought, like they're obviously not going to say anything because they're playing, you know, first of all, college athletes are terrible interviews as it is, but, uh, they're not going to, they're not going to throw their guy in or the bus.

Starting point is 00:32:36 But man, I would love for just one of them to be candid and just like, I don't know, what is the dynamic of that locker room when he comes into the game dressed like that? And it's the, you want to rip on him, but he's the coach of son and you, so you can't really rip on him like you want to. It's all fascinating. I think if I was on that team, I would just become best friends with them because there's no, there's no better job security than being friends with the son, right? I truly do think it is a plus for Kentucky.

Starting point is 00:33:01 Like I'm not hating on black Brad Cowapari. I think he is like, when you show up and you have to play Kentucky, you're already in an uphill battle because they're a good team. And then you see this guy just mean mugging you with his half black, half blue jean jacket that I didn't even know was ever, I didn't know that was a real thing. So I think it just adds to the whole mystique of Kentucky basketball. The best part about him being, about him registering to is that he still travels with the team. He's still like, he still like warms up or he goes like shoot around.

Starting point is 00:33:31 He's still prepped. Like there's literally not, you would have, if they'd never announced the red shirt, no one would have any idea that you're in. Right. Yeah, you're a clue. He's a one man bench mob. Actually, the entire Calipari family, they've, they've been in the news too. So his daughters got into like some beef with J. Billis because J tweeted out an article that had a featured image of, of their dad.

Starting point is 00:33:54 It was an article about corruption in college basketball and the investigations of which John Calipari was not even mentioned in the article. The article was not about him and they went after J. Billis. So you got to tell me, are you on team Billis or you on team Calipari? Man, you're making me pick between my parents, like the parents are splitting up and I get to pick who I live with here. Hank took Billis. Careful. Can I just say before you answer this question,

Starting point is 00:34:19 I have nothing but respect for the Calipari daughters because they are ride or die on Twitter. I'm on their good side. I don't want to stay on their good side. No, they're funny on Twitter. They're hilarious. I like them. Yeah. Yes. I think so. What's great about both of these is that they're both leaning very heavily

Starting point is 00:34:37 into the brand that they occupy, which is like the Caliparis. The way, the way you kind of handle this would be just to not care. You're just like, oh, that's unfortunate that our dad is in this picture, but almost by it's like a strizing effect thing, like almost by bringing it up and you're shouting at everyone. No one has any evidence that my dad has ever cheated. You're like, well, we weren't really talking about that until you brought it up. But now that you mention it, it is weird that, you know, no one's talking about it.

Starting point is 00:35:04 So that that one is that one's a Calipari family move to always be on the defensive with that stuff. Meanwhile, on the other hand, Billis, I don't know if you saw it, like one of the Kentucky fans replied to his tweet and said, this is classless of you. And it's the very first day you said a response that don't be an idiot. Yeah, it's a Kentucky fan. And that is classic bill is as well, which is like just unapologetically,

Starting point is 00:35:26 I am condescending, I am smarter than you. I went to law school, I went to Duke. So I love it both. Like that's why I can't pick it, because we need these characters in college basketball. We need J. Billis. Like any time a player is, you know, a player could punch his coach in the face and be suspended for the first four minutes of a game. And those beyond Twitter, this is absolutely wrong at all caps.

Starting point is 00:35:48 Like what happened to players? Right. And, you know, I just love guys that just like, you know, they know their stick and they stick to it. And so I guess I'll lean towards Billis because he's more powerful than Megan Calipari in this situation. Billis can help my career more than Megan Calipari can. So I don't know. I don't know about that.

Starting point is 00:36:08 So here's the thing, like, yes, you're right. It was like a Streisand affecting where they drew more attention to it, but they also drew more attention as to how badass they are. So like, if anything, that's like a warning shot to the NCAA. You come at my dad, you're going to get dunked on, on Twitter by me and all my sisters. So yeah, I, I like this. Can you talk real quick about, I'm going to do a talk about, but this Kentucky team, because I like them and they are,

Starting point is 00:36:33 I've watched them a few times and they're nails. Like at the end of games, they turn it up a level and you're like, man, these guys are really good. They did it against Kansas. They did it on the road against Florida. I like Kentucky's always good, but it feels like this team has a little extra, you know, we can be in tough moments and still survive. This Kentucky team is what Kentucky fans think every Kentucky team is,

Starting point is 00:36:57 which is they're young at the start of the season, and it takes them a little while to figure it out. And then they actually do sort of figure it out. And that is, I mean, obviously everyone remembers they got smoked by Duke. And I think smoke is not even strong enough of an adjective for what happened to that. They were, they were humiliated. But yeah, man, they're coming around. It is very strange because I think a lot of people just kind of form off.

Starting point is 00:37:20 And certainly in the college basketball media, I think people are starting to recognize what's happening at Kentucky. It really feels like people aren't talking about Kentucky a lot, which is shocking because every other season it's like Kentucky and Duke are the only two teams that everyone talks about. And it's like Duke killed them on the first day of the season and everyone just kind of pushed them to the side and said, all right, so we don't have to worry about Kentucky the rest of the year.

Starting point is 00:37:41 And they're coming around, man. Like all their, all their guys are playing. Well, I love PJ Washington. I hated Tyler hero at the start of the season. I went to the Duke Kentucky game. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You really hate that kid, right? I mean, he was, he was, he's from Wisconsin and he's just like a stone cold killer

Starting point is 00:37:55 and he plays for fucking Kentucky and he committed to Wisconsin. And he committed to Wisconsin. Yeah. It's brutal watching him just kill people. So I have, yeah, go ahead. Sorry. Oh, good. It's not, I don't have them. I don't, it's not good.

Starting point is 00:38:06 Well, I wanted to go off what you were saying there with people are talking about Kentucky. I have a theory this is actually like one of the deepest seasons we have in terms of teams that I could see winning the final four. But because of Duke and how must watch they are in Zion, no one's really paying attention to Tennessee, Michigan, Villanova's come back from the dead. Kentucky, Virginia, like Kansas always lurking. So I feel like this is the, the season that there are so many good teams,

Starting point is 00:38:37 but everyone only wants to talk about Duke in their quest for an undefeated season. Right. Right. Duke is, yes. Yeah, Duke, Duke is better than everybody it feels like right now. I know Gonzaga beat them, but I would say so. It's become a big thing in college basketball, the tier stuff. I don't know who started it, but you just start throwing out tears. I think like the guys at ESPN started it is throw things in tears.

Starting point is 00:39:02 And I think Duke is at the top tier, although they do play at Virginia this weekend and that could get interesting. We'll get to rematch of that game. I would say like Virginia, I like Virginia and Gonzaga. They're both up there with them. And then I think like you get to tier three or like Tennessee and Michigan. Like Tennessee defensively has kind of let their foot off, off the gas a little bit. They, they started feeling themselves a little bit.

Starting point is 00:39:24 I do really like them. I, if anyone who knows anything about me and am I feeling on Tennessee? I've, I've been singing their praises all season. I'm just slightly worried that they peaked too soon to borrow for it. Um, but yeah, it's definitely the best team they deserve. I mean, for God's sakes, like Duke is still the heavy favorite to win it. And then this, I think the team that has the second best odds in Vegas is Gonzaga. And it's pretty much because Gonzaga is the only team to beat Duke at full strength.

Starting point is 00:39:49 So, um, it is, it is sort of a Duke versus the field thing, which, uh, which is terrible because that means Duke is definitely going to win the national duke. Yeah, but then you can like in Zaga. But until Mark few makes a final four, I don't know if we can really buy into what he's building out there. Um, so I, big cat obviously pays more attention to college basketball before the end of the NFL season. I just have to force myself to do a complete flip over.

Starting point is 00:40:15 I've, I've paid attention a little bit, but I want to know, like, obviously, I know all the blue bloods that are good this year. Um, but if I'm keeping my eye on a mid major, um, going into March, give me two mid majors that you think are capable of making the final four at this point. All right. So here's the mid major. You're going to love 50, uh, a team called Wofford. Um, they are the Wofford terriers.

Starting point is 00:40:38 And here's, here's what you need to know about them. They're, they're leading scorer is named Fletcher McGee. You might have heard about this kid. He, he shoots, he shoots a lot of threes. He's a white guy, spoiler alert. Um, and they're leading assist guy is named Storm Murphy. And he's also a white guy. So those are, those are, they're like, those are, that's their back core is a

Starting point is 00:40:57 guy named Storm Murphy and Fletcher McGee. Sounds like a porn star. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a team, it's a team that like pops it. Like, if you pay no attention to college basketball and you're suddenly like turned on the TV in March and you see a team of two white guys named Storm and

Starting point is 00:41:10 Fletcher, they're like torching Kansas. You're like, what the fuck? Yeah. It's very confusing. So that's a team. Uh, I'm, I'm giving, I'm giving people a little heads up before that comes around. And then, um, I don't know, like San Diego state still has Mike Dom. Oh, he's kind of, he's almost, wait, you mean, uh, North Dakota state.

Starting point is 00:41:30 Or South Dakota state, we're all over the place. Yeah. I have a state in my mind. Yeah. It's South Dakota state. Um, South, did I say San Diego? That's embarrassing. San Diego state.

Starting point is 00:41:39 Yeah. And I got you close to the Dakotas cause Mike Dom does fill it up. I just got the wrong Dakota. Uh, he is back. He is, he is about to score 3,000 points. As you can tell, he's not on the forefront of people's minds. I fucked up the school that he plays at, uh, but he's, he's a killer. And, uh, he went vegan this, this was the concern about him though.

Starting point is 00:41:57 He goes vegan this summer. Yeah. And then they play in Canada and he gets his ass handed to him. And then he, there's like a quote right before the season where he's like, I made a huge mistake going vegan. It's like, I did just fix this immediately. And so he started eating meat again. And I think he's doing well this year.

Starting point is 00:42:14 My one problem with Wofford, and this is a dumb brain problem. They have, they start with a W, same with Wake Forest, same colors. And I think there are South Carolina and Wake Forests is in North Carolina. So I always confuse them. That's just my one, like I can never get into Wofford. That's actually interesting. Yeah. Like I always just think Wake Forest, same font, silver or no, gold and black.

Starting point is 00:42:35 It just fucks me up. How do you respond to that analysis? Yeah. They're, well, here's my counterpoint if you're doing dumb brain stuff. Um, so everyone got excited about UMBC because they were the retrievers and you could tweet dog gifts and be like, how cute are these good boys? Wofford is the terriers. They are, they are lending themselves to like a cosmic run where, where the

Starting point is 00:42:57 internet wills it into existence where people can tweet gifts of dogs again. I need to know what type of terrier though. Is it like the something about Mary terrier? Because there are a lot of gifts out there with that. I think it's a, or a Boston terrier, Boston. That's pretty cool. I believe so. I, we can, that was my favorite move during the UMBC run last year.

Starting point is 00:43:15 People get excited and tweet like golden retriever stuff. And then the hard as I would respond and be like, it's actually a Chesapeake favorite driver, not a golden retriever. You're like, okay, cool. They like water more and they like cold. They can break ice with their chests. That's a fact about the chest is that I know. Um, so we're best friends with Buzz Williams now.

Starting point is 00:43:34 I'm not sure if you know that or not. Um, I was watching them play the other night against Louisville and something interesting happened at the end of the game. Um, they were down by eight points and Buzz elected not to foul because in eight point loss, uh, factors less. It's a, it's a, uh, better loss than if they lose by double digits. Um, if you look at the, how the computers sort thing out. Now, is this something that's been going on for years and I'm too dumb to

Starting point is 00:43:58 have known about, or is Buzz Williams, has he figured out a way to disrupt the computer system? Uh, he's ahead of the curve. So this is the, the new metric that they have is called like the net. They got rid of the RPI. It basically just like through the RPI into a blend, like a sausage grinder and ground it up and then turned it, and then they called it the net. And it's basically the same thing, but it's supposedly better.

Starting point is 00:44:22 Um, long story short, part of the new metric is margin of victory up to like 10 points or up to 20 points or something like that. And at a 11, an eight point loss is better than a 10 point loss. And so that sort of stuff like matters. And I don't know how much it actually matters, but, uh, the statiners have gone too far and Buzz Williams is, it was actually kind of smart. Like he, it totally makes sense. And it does actually matter for the net ranking in the end.

Starting point is 00:44:47 Um, it's just hilarious that that's, that that's what you're seeing is like, he called time, I think they were down 11 with 20 seconds. Yeah, they hit a three. Yeah. They hit a three and then they didn't follow. And it fucks up everyone who bets over unders in college basketball because one of the greatest parts about college basketball is the scrub who just keeps fouling when they're down 10 with like 10 seconds left and you get free, free

Starting point is 00:45:09 throws that are just so pointless. And that's how you get like, you're called walk on the big head. Yeah. Oh, sorry. And you get like 35, my favorite thing about college basketball is you have a game go be trending under all game and you have 35 points in the last 90 seconds. And you're like, wait, how does that make sense?

Starting point is 00:45:24 It's just free throws and guys chucking up threes. Um, Mark, I want to give you, uh, maybe a minute here to talk to us about how this is the year Virginia is going to win it all because actually it's not bad offense. They're totally efficient and, um, it's not going to bite them in the ass when they can't score a basket late in the tournament. This is the worst. This is, uh, this is the worst because this is the worst show to have it be.

Starting point is 00:45:54 Cause like, God damn it. You love Virginia. I do love Virginia. I'm interested. I do love Virginia. And the problem is that this is literally the worst show to try to make it serious. Kate, do it, do it. I actually believe in Virginia this time.

Starting point is 00:46:10 Honest to God, hand to God is better. Wait, do you actually being serious? Okay. Go ahead. Sorry. I just to make sure. Okay. God damn it.

Starting point is 00:46:19 Um, this is, this is their year. Uh, no, I don't know if they're going to win their offense is better this year than it has been every year. And I know that then we say that every year. I'm not, I'm not even going to say this every year, every year, but your, your beloved Villanova Wildcat, everyone said the same thing until you gave them the big cap bump. That's true.

Starting point is 00:46:40 Can you please just do this for Virginia? I could. Poor people have. Yes. You're, you are right. In 2015, I'd said Villanova would lose in the second round and they lost to NC state and Villanova fans hated me. And then the next year I said, this is the year I believe, and I took them, I put

Starting point is 00:46:56 them on my back Kirby pocket style and brought them to a national championship. So I'll think about it, but at the end day, I want Tony Bennett to come, come home to Wisconsin. So maybe I won't do that. Maybe I'll just keep watching them lose in, in hilarious ways. Virginia is Wisconsin. They're just a little bit better and higher profile because they play in the ACC and they're always ranked a little higher.

Starting point is 00:47:19 So watching them fail is so funny. It's, it's like a reminder for Wisconsin never to fly too close to the sun. Like we never want to get too good because then we'll be a total joke like Virginia. So it sounds like, I can't believe Tony Bennett doesn't want to come to Wisconsin. Notable alumni is calling this program a total joke. No, it's not a total joke. Hey, listen, this actually goes perfectly to my next question about the big 10.

Starting point is 00:47:45 Well, actually, no, first, do you believe in Ken Palm? Um, I used to, and then people like idiots started. Yeah. Well, the problem, it became gospel and people stopped thinking for themselves and they were just like, this team is number one and here's why. And then they would just link to Ken Palm and then I, you know, you could, Ken Palm ended college basketball debates for like two years. Okay.

Starting point is 00:48:08 So you like Ken Palm before it was cool. Yeah. And now everybody shows up to the party and you're like, you like Ken Palm? Name three other albums. Okay. So here's a tip though. Here's a tip. Use Ken Palm when it helps your, your, your point and then just completely

Starting point is 00:48:23 disregard it when it doesn't back it up. And that's where I'm coming to with, uh, there are one, two, three, four, big 10 teams in the top 11 of Ken Palm. I used 11 because Wisconsin's 11. It's an arbitrary cutoff. I don't care. Will this finally be the year that the big 10 can break the drought? Uh, wait, are we counting?

Starting point is 00:48:45 No, Maryland one, Maryland one before. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. So we count Maryland. So O two, it's been all the way since O two is this year that we can finally stop this drought and, uh, get back into the national championship. The great part about, uh, the, the Maryland thing too is that they beat Indiana, which kind of started the drought because part of the, part of the drought isn't

Starting point is 00:49:07 just that we're not winning national championships because that's, I mean, the pack 12 does that. That's, the pack 12 doesn't exist anymore. Well, I have that written down. I said, Hey, remember the pack 12? That's one of my questions. We'll get to it. Um, the, uh, the, the other, the part of it isn't just that we're not winning.

Starting point is 00:49:23 It's that like every goddamn big 10 program has made it to the national championship and loss. Yup. And I'm not really sure what the psychology of that is or how to fix that. Um, it's bad. I don't know, but we don't have, I don't think there is a T. I don't think the big 10 has a team good enough to win the national championship.

Starting point is 00:49:39 They're here. What about Wisconsin? Wait, but wait, big cat back up. Haven't you not allowed Maryland into the big 10 yet? No, in basketball. No, that's, that's very interesting. I'm very clear. But you're going to, you're going to claim their title that they won when they

Starting point is 00:49:50 were in ACC school as a big 10 title now. Yes. I've been very clear from the beginning that the Maryland basketball is in the big 10 Maryland football, Rutgers football, and Rutgers basketball, still not including all their wins from before they were in the big 10, like retroactively there. Now you're doing the gotcha thing. No, no, no, I am very open.

Starting point is 00:50:08 I move the yard sticks as much as, as how I want to. I'm getting on the same page because we've never had this conversation. Yeah. Um, but if you want to talk about big 10 Nebraska's national titles count for the big 10 in football, perfect. I get that. Yeah. But if we're, if we're looking at the big 10, you mentioned it, uh, Michigan state.

Starting point is 00:50:23 Now it's, we're going on 18 years since they've last won a title. How close am I to my Tom Izzo is overrated take, uh, to coming true. Hmm. The jury's still out. We need to see more. Uh, I mean, like Tom Izzo is, I don't think he's overrated. I think he's good. I think, I think the fact that everyone else is stuck, I think Tom Izzo being able to say,

Starting point is 00:50:46 I'm the last coach to win a championship in the big 10 is like a feather in his cap. That's true. Yeah. That's actually, I believe that. Yeah. Yeah. He's like, I, I did the impossible. I led a big 10 team to the title.

Starting point is 00:50:58 Okay. So, yeah. Yeah. So tell me the big 10 team that could come closest. Uh, hmm. Well, I mean, it's obviously either Michigan or Michigan state. I know Purdue fans are going to get really upset that I said that because Purdue is like right up there.

Starting point is 00:51:12 10. Yeah. Yeah. Purdue's playing well. I like Purdue. They have Carson Edwards. He's probably the best player in the big 10. But I think it's got to be Michigan state or Michigan.

Starting point is 00:51:24 And Michigan state is just not talented enough. I don't think like none of it, they have like, I mean, Cassius Winston will probably play in the league a little bit, but outside of that, I don't think they have enough talent to kind of, they could get to the final four, but they definitely like, I don't trust them against, you know, if they get to the final four and they got to beat like Duke and Gonzaga back to back, I don't, I don't think they can do that. Michigan is interesting, but their offense is horrible. Their offense is like, they play great defense.

Starting point is 00:51:49 They have maybe the best defense in the country, but they are so disjointed offensively and it gets very, very ugly. I mean, for God's sakes, their point guard is like their best player and he's got one shot and it's like a running hook shot off the glass. And like their second best player is probably Charles Matthews. Maybe, I don't know. And he, he, he can't shoot threes to save his life. And it's just a, their offense is an absolute mess sometimes.

Starting point is 00:52:13 And so I'm worried about that, but that's why I don't think we have any shot because like the rest of the teams are the teams that are good enough to fuck it up for someone else, but not actually win it, you know, Wisconsin, what would you say? I'm, I'm thinking maybe a 52 to 48 first round win and then like a 55, 51 second round loss. Yeah, it all depends on the momentum Wisconsin has going in. Like if, if this is supposed to be a good Wisconsin team by the time tournament comes around, they're fucked. Yup.

Starting point is 00:52:42 It's just like they live towards the finish line. They lose in the first round of the big 10 tournament to like Illinois or something. And then they get like a seven seed. That's, that's a dangerous Wisconsin team. Yes. And Ethan, I want no part of, you love Ethan Hap. He is the, maybe the most confusing player to watch play basketball because he's like from eight feet in, he's maybe the best basketball player to ever play the game.

Starting point is 00:53:07 And then from eight feet out, he looks like he's never actually touched a basketball. The way I describe Ethan Hap, and I've used this joke before or this observation before, but it's okay. I'm going to do it again. Cause it's the only thing that makes sense to me. If he is the guy when you're creating a player on a video game and you, you forget, like whatever year it was where they started like putting a cap on the number of skill points you can use on your creative player.

Starting point is 00:53:30 Like back in the day, you used to be able to just max out everybody. Ethan Hap is the guy like that first year where they had a cap where you go create a player and you're starting to put 99 on everything and then you run out of points. You're like, what the fuck is that? And like jump shot, jump shot is his last category and he has like a zero jump shot. He's got 99 everything else. And then you're like, well, screw it. I'll be fine.

Starting point is 00:53:51 And then you just say, go ahead with the career and then you play. And that's Ethan Hap. That's the only way I could describe his game. That's perfect. He's great at everything else. He can't shoot the ball to save his life. I like that. Serious question.

Starting point is 00:54:02 Is Louisville being ranked number 16 and being kind of good, damaging to Rick Petino's legacy now that he's no longer there? Uh, hmm, we're still in the window where he can say like, these are his recruits or this is his foundation, right? Absolutely. No, the window where you're just like. There are D's as recruits. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:54:23 Yeah. So yeah, I would say this is good for him. Anything that happens in the next couple of years is like, I brought that for you guys. You're welcome. What do you think? We're still in that range. What do you think about all the talk about Rick going out to UCLA? You think there's any fire with us at Smoke?

Starting point is 00:54:41 That would be fantastic. Realistically, it's not going to happen, but that would be like the greatest thing ever if you went out there. That is the Darren O'Vell, I feel sorry for UCLA fans, but this is tremendous content of College of Asthma. That is exactly what that would be. But no, there's no way it's happening. I think he is going to get a job eventually though, because

Starting point is 00:55:04 colleges are shameless and they'll hire, but he's not going to get a power conference job. He's not going to get a relevant job, but it'll pop up somewhere. He's going to go to some tiny school and someone's going to write the article, like probably Dickie V, about how Rick Petino is changing his image and all that kind of shit. And he's on the path to redemption and all that. And I'll lead it up. No one loves anyone more than Dickie V loves Rick Petino.

Starting point is 00:55:34 It's unbelievable. Nobody. It is unbelievable. All right. So let's get to the question. Do you remember the Pac-12? Like what's up? Oh my God.

Starting point is 00:55:45 I think they're soft, dude. I think like I'm okay with saying this, because like I've been spending more time in Los Angeles. I've spent extended periods of time to where like when I'm around, and when I'm in Ohio, I can now say that I tell people that I live in it. Like, you know, back in LA, here's how we do it. I've become that pretentious asshole in Ohio. So I've spent enough time in LA to know that the West Coast,

Starting point is 00:56:07 they're soft. That's really all it is. Like I became soft when I went to LA. I was there for like two months this fall. The weather's perfect in LA. I come back home and it's like freezing balls. And I was like just crying every day. And I was complaining about it.

Starting point is 00:56:20 The polar vortex almost killed me. I couldn't handle it. And I'm just thinking about it like if I'm that, just imagine people like being born and raised there. And this is a real thing. I'm doubling down on the, the Pac-12 was just soft. Their only hope is to like import kids from the East Coast. But even then like these kids get out there and you just,

Starting point is 00:56:40 I mean, who wants to go to UCLA and like be in a gym all day every day and work on your game? Right. No. That's not why you go to UCLA. No. No. Come on.

Starting point is 00:56:49 That's my, that's my theory. Yeah. Yeah. It's, I mean, it's, it sucks too because I love Pac-12 basketball just because it's the late night basketball. So it's, you know, everyone watches it. It's the last thing on, especially if you're chasing bats, but it's, there are no good teams like Arizona state every now and then UCLA.

Starting point is 00:57:06 Okay. Every now and then Oregon, maybe a little bit, but like top to bottom, they just all kind of stink. Washington is, is okay maybe this year. They're, they're, they're rolling through the Pac-12 right now, but it's just, they're non-conference. Everyone in the non-conference was so bad. I don't know.

Starting point is 00:57:25 Like they really, Washington really might be the only team that makes it in if they won the tournament. Isn't that kind of good though for Sean Miller at Arizona? Because if, if the Pac-12 was good, if Arizona was good, there'd be way more heat on him right now. Somehow he's still the coach there. And I don't think that he's going anywhere anytime soon, despite the fact that like last year,

Starting point is 00:57:43 he was about 12 hours away from getting shit canned. Is he, is he actually going to like survive this thing? Uh, I don't really think there's, this is the classic guitar to say. I don't really think there's like no one, I found out that nobody actually knows anything about it in this stuff. All the people that are reporting on it have no idea what's going to happen in these trials and stuff. But, um, yeah, he, he, he's probably going to survive

Starting point is 00:58:08 because Arizona has the number one recruiting class next season, which is the funniest part about all the FBI stuff is like three of the schools that were, that were caught up in it all were Arizona, USC and Louisville. And I'm pretty sure those three schools are the top three recruiting classes next year in college basketball, which is just, it couldn't be more perfect, honestly. So I'm sure he's going to be fine.

Starting point is 00:58:28 I'm sure USC like that's the genie. I mean, Lorenzo Romar survived on the West coast for like 10 years longer than he should, just because he kept dangling the carrot of next year's recruiting class in front of Washington. They're like, well, we can't fire him now. And cause you've got next year's class coming in. I think Sean Miller is going to do that for like at least five more years.

Starting point is 00:58:45 That works. And then finally they'll just give up on it. Yeah. That's a lot of sweat. Uh, all right. My last question, it's a Seeky question put in promo code take, go to a college basketball game this year, $10 off your Seeky purchase promo code take.

Starting point is 00:58:57 We mentioned Tennessee. They're currently ranked number one. And I have to ask you the question because this is how I feel about them. Rick Barnes, he stinks in the tournament. And I know like people will be like, well, he actually overachieved when he was a lower seed. Well, guess what? Tennessee is going to have a pretty high seed this year.

Starting point is 00:59:16 Tell me, change my opinion that Rick Barnes doesn't stink in the tournament. I can't do that. I would say if you're trying to, like, I don't have any faith in Rick Barnes in the tournament. I have faith in their, their, in Admiral Schofield and Grant Williams. Like there's two best players who are, are awesome guys and play their asses off and are a ton of fun to watch and play deep. I don't know.

Starting point is 00:59:38 Like Grant Williams is basically Tyler Handsboro. What everyone thought Tyler Handsboro was is who Grant Williams is. He's unbelievable. He's, he's just a fucking workhorse. And just like, I don't know how to describe him if you've never seen a play. For me, like, if you're a guy, if you're a fan of the college game, he is like must see TV. And then Admiral Schofield, a ton of fun too.

Starting point is 00:59:58 So I really like those guys. They play great defense. They, they have great leadership, all that kind of stuff. But I can't, you know, Barnes's history is well documented. I mean, the man got smoked by USC in the second round with Kevin Durant and DJ Augustine. Yeah. That's a tough overcome. Well, so if you're Texas right now and you had a magic lamp,

Starting point is 01:00:17 would you rather have Rick Barnes as your head coach again or stick with Shaka? Oh, for real. If for sure you'd rather have Rick Barnes. Because like that town, that town hated Rick Barnes when he was there. Like the last two or three years, they wanted him out. You, uh, yeah, you don't, you don't follow college basketball that closely. So this is a good, this is a good way for me to test this and see if it's true. I don't, I don't either.

Starting point is 01:00:39 It's okay. Uh, how many, how many sweet 16s do you think Shaka Smart has been to in his career? Two. As someone who, the answer is one. Okay. But it was a good scene, but you forgot about Havoc. That is true. Do you have a hashtag?

Starting point is 01:00:57 Yes, Havoc. If you, that's the thing, like you, if you go to a sweet 16 as an underdog, people will remember it forever. Like anytime George Mason pops up and like, Oh, George Mason, they went farther. But if you have a style that is different, like Havoc, where you, where you full court press all the time, people will just give you like six sweet 16 appearances. Yeah. Shaka Smart invented the full court press.

Starting point is 01:01:22 Right. And well, that's, I thought that that's what the reason I SPFT, because I feel like the general public thinks that Shaka just went on these runs at VCU and was great. And it's, it's like hilarious to look back and be like, Oh, this dude had one good year. No, it was him and Brad Stevens were like the two hottest things that have ever happened to college basketball. And as it turns out, he had one year. I just remember that, um, he had a couple of good teams.

Starting point is 01:01:47 I think he had like three good seasons, but he had that one run, but you're right. It's like, uh, Jim Laranega, I'll always believe that he is like a top five head coach Chicago, because he took George Mason. Yeah. Loyal Chicago for the next 10 years, people are like, watch out for Loyal Chicago. Yeah. Like that's what happens when you make a deep run as a, as a team that's not in the major conferences. And the best, the best part about the VCU run too is that they shouldn't have even got

Starting point is 01:02:09 in the tournament in the first place. They had to play the playing game and it was like controversial that they were even in there. Dicky V was like crying on TV. I forget who got left out. Probably Syracuse because of him and his buddy Jim Bayon didn't get it. I don't remember who was, but, uh, they shouldn't have even been in and then they made it in and he, he, he went four games or whatever it was. Which is the final four.

Starting point is 01:02:26 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that's it. Yeah. That's what happens. That's what happens when you, uh, when you have a, a small school and you go far and you have a hashtag. Also, I think that the fact that Nick Wright looks so much like him and he's always on TV,

Starting point is 01:02:41 that kind of bumps the profile for Chaka Smart. True. Also, just a cool name. That is true. All of these are very true. Yeah. I wanted Chaka to also come home to Madison, Wisconsin. Just bring all the like coaches that really can't win a big game and just be like, yeah,

Starting point is 01:02:57 we'll take it. Fuck it. Who cares? It's like the A team of B team coaches. Tony Bennett and Chaka Smart will, will be co-coaches of Wisconsin and we still won't win a national title. The score will be 12 to 13. It'll be great.

Starting point is 01:03:13 Oh, last question. Kansas, they do this every year. Like, no, they're horrible this year. No, but, but they're still going to win the big 12. They're still in the big, but the big 12 isn't as good this year. Like Kansas, this is not, yeah, Kansas is not good. No. Kansas fans will tell you they're not good.

Starting point is 01:03:30 I know, but they do it every year where they just like, I feel like this is Kansas. They're, they're, they're, everyone says, oh, Kansas, maybe not. And then they win the big 12 and they get a one, two or three seed and then they might win a couple of games and then Bill Self's little pouch of losses grows a little bit bigger. Sad on the sideline. And what's his name? I fucking hate that guy. He can't shoot free throws at all.

Starting point is 01:03:53 It was Becky. No, what's his name? I was a bouquet. I, I've never seen someone. He put so much spin on a free throw shot. It's like he's intentionally trying to miss. Coming, coming from a guy who loves ease and half. This is, this is crazy.

Starting point is 01:04:10 Okay. Well, you can have tries for the free throws. He doesn't put a spin on it to like, see if I can get it off on a weird angle. Here's, here's my take. That's going to endear myself to Kansas fans and they're going to love me for saying this. I don't think Kansas wins the big 12 every year. I think Kansas fans win the big 12 every year. How about that one? I think fog Allen, fog Allen's field house wins the big 12 for Kansas every year.

Starting point is 01:04:33 That it's impossible to win in there. And so they go into every big 12 season, knowing that they're getting nine free wins just by virtue of playing in fog Allen's field house. I like that. Right. And so like, their team sucks this year. Like if you switched to home court, if, if like Kansas had to play in Baylor's arena every single night, they're not winning the big 12 this year. But the Kansas fans, God damn it, they're going to win the victory.

Starting point is 01:04:54 So they're, this team is not good though. I don't like, I don't like this Kansas team before they, they started having like, I was a bouquet without for the year and all that kind of stuff. And like, Ligero Vicks, like their best player, but he's like, Bill Self didn't even want them like literally kicked him off the team after the season last year. He said, go to the NBA and Ligero Vicks like, but I'm not going to get drafted. And he's like, go anyway. And he's like, okay.

Starting point is 01:05:16 And then Bill Self looked at the roster and like, boy, Ligero, come back. We need you. And then he's been like, he's been suspended or maybe not suspended. He started, he's not started some games. He started, it's a whole fucking mess. And I could talk about Kansas all day, but this team is definitely different. They probably will win the big 12, but do not believe in them as like a typical team that, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:05:37 I do like that take though. You'll never have to buy another beer in Lawrence. Yeah, I never, I never have to buy another beer in Lubbock actually. Yeah. Because it's a dry county. True. Give me one last gambling trend because you gave me one a few years ago, which always works the back to back mountain games when a team has to go play

Starting point is 01:05:56 Utah and Colorado in the same weekend. So Thursday, Utah, Saturday, Colorado, it actually happened. I think this past weekend, Colorado killed someone on Saturday on a back to back. But what's another trend that any of our degenerate listeners can use for betting on college basketball? I don't know, man. I don't, I don't gamble. Come on.

Starting point is 01:06:16 I don't know. You need to start gambling, Mark. Yeah. It's honestly weirder that you don't. It kind of is. I feel very left out that everyone, this is like the same. I wouldn't even, yeah, I don't know. I can't even fake it to be honest with you.

Starting point is 01:06:31 That was the one nugget I had was that I gave you all my secrets. Yeah. Could you make the argument though? If you play the second night of like a high altitude game, your body's acclimated to it? No, you get more tires. College kids after all. Here's what I'll say. I like, I've always liked teams that have a really good guard and defense and NCAA tournament play.

Starting point is 01:06:50 So that, that, that is most of the good teams. A lot of people will roll your eyes and be like, well, thank you. You just named all the best teams. Senior guards. Um, uh, if, if a guy, I want a guy who is going to play an NBA, who I can look at and be like, that is an NBA guard. Yep. If you have an NBA guard that you can throw the ball to and be like, our offense sucks,

Starting point is 01:07:09 please go score for us. And then you also play great team defense. I trust you more than a team that, you know, I don't know, I had centers around a big guy or, is like offense is minded. So that, that's my, that's my gambling advice. Again, that probably applies to all the best teams, but yeah. I love that guy. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:07:28 And be a guard. Um, I have one last question. Who's the guy that I should start hating already? Hmm. Hmm. This is a great one. I mean, Alex O'Connell on Duke, is he not hateable enough? No.

Starting point is 01:07:42 Yeah. Absolutely not. Hank's best friends with him. Absolutely not. Hank's best friends with him. Maybe the most wonderful player in the NCAA. I feel like that's a cop out answer on your part though, just to name like the white guy and Duke with a punchable face.

Starting point is 01:07:52 He's also good. But it's not always the white guy on Duke. It's like, because like Jack White is a white guy on Duke. I really like him. And I think he plays hard and he's really good at what he needs to do for that team. And I don't have a problem with him. It's like Alex O'Connell's haircut. Hank, are you really friends with him?

Starting point is 01:08:09 Yeah. Best friends. He recently got a haircut too. Breaking news. This is incredible. The answer definitely has to be Alex O'Connell then, right? Yeah, I think it has to be Alex O'Connell now. By way of association with Hank.

Starting point is 01:08:23 Yeah, it's just because We'll take that smoke. Oh man. All right, Mark. Thank you. One shining podcast. Everyone listen to it. He co-host it with actually, no, Tate's the host, right?

Starting point is 01:08:36 Yeah, right. Yeah. Tate teased me up and then I provide all the hard hitting analysis. Yeah. So Tate hosted by Tate Frazier. Listen to Tate Frazier's podcast. Mark Titus, one shining podcast. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:08:48 Hey, can you guys do me a favor? So I was listening. I was catching up because every time I come on the show, part of my appeal is that like people think I actually listen to your podcast all the time. Yeah, that does make you more likeable. So to fit in and keep that ruse going that I actually listened, I listened to a couple of the recent episodes and the Dan Marino interview. You go into the Dan Marino interview and when you set it up, you're always like,

Starting point is 01:09:11 and you've done this before with other shitty interviews really. This interview was horrible. I don't know guys, we're going to check this out. And I've noticed that whenever you set an interview up like that, it generates more discussion about the interview. Yes. You know what I mean? Like people then are like, oh, now I definitely want to listen.

Starting point is 01:09:26 And then people are talking about it on Twitter a little bit more. And they're like, I didn't think it was that bad. I actually did think it was that bad. And everyone wants to talk about it. Can we do that with me? Can you set this up and be like, oh, Titus is off today. We'll be like, we're not friends anymore with Titus after this interview. And you have to listen to the end to find out why.

Starting point is 01:09:45 But we seriously got into a really big. And then people get to right now, we're going to actually leave this in. So they get to right now and they realize that we just got them. Yep. You got, you got got. I can't believe the race of shit he was saying. He was very strange. And then now, now we're here folks.

Starting point is 01:10:03 And we still love Mark Titus. And you should still live to one, listen to one shiny pie. All right, Mark. All right. Thanks guys. Thanks man. Talk to you soon. See you Mark.

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Starting point is 01:11:55 And so it's like me growing up watching my favorite player hit dingers. I get into the major leagues and now in that same park, I'm hitting those same dingers. Yeah, you're clicking that microphone. Yeah, so click that microphone, but this time use promo code PMT. That interview was also brought to you by meundies. Valentine's is right around the corner. Rather than spending all that money going out to a fancy restaurant, why not just hang in your underwear all night courtesy of meundies?

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Starting point is 01:13:28 Great interview. Asshole. That was actually a good idea that he had. Yeah, it was. Let's get it going. Get the people talking. Be provocative. You left that in there, right, Hank?

Starting point is 01:13:38 Okay. Bachelor talk. For guys that don't watch the Bachelor, even though Hank watches the Bachelor. Absolutely not. I do not watch the Bachelor. Definitely didn't watch last night. Uh, why?

Starting point is 01:13:47 Because I was sleeping. I told you, Champ Japan. Because you were tired, yeah. You were tired from your vacation. I was going to forget about that. Yeah, yeah. Do you know PFT? I do.

Starting point is 01:13:54 Yeah, listen. When I got back from Stanley Cup. Because it was not too long ago. Yeah, I was pretty. 2016. Yeah, wow. Really? Fuck, it's 2019.

Starting point is 01:14:02 Last time I heard that, I fell off my dinosaur. Heather, who would never kiss anyone in her life. Those dudes here. True. Heather, kiss. Heather, who would never kiss anyone in her life. Kiss Colton on their one date in China. And Thailand.

Starting point is 01:14:17 Wait. Wait, Hank. Come on. No. Come on, Hank. No. Thailand. Come on, Hank.

Starting point is 01:14:22 No. No. Waitle, Hank learns what the capital of Thailand is. No, Hank. No. Come on. Hank. Do you have another pronunciation for it?

Starting point is 01:14:31 Thailand. Yes, there you go. All right. Good job, Hank. Nice little switcheroo there. That was a hezzy hey. I didn't even listen to the question. Read the statement.

Starting point is 01:14:38 They kissed. In Thailand. I read Thailand. I thought China or I said Thailand. And I said Thailand. All right. Okay, off to a hot start. I'm going to get you a map for an expert to hit.

Starting point is 01:14:50 Oh, wait. Wait. So what's the thing? They kissed. They went on a date in Thailand. Heather has never kissed anyone. Colton's a virgin and apparently they kissed in Thailand. Got it.

Starting point is 01:14:58 Something's got to give there. Yeah. You got a virgin and then someone that hasn't. Like Colton probably looks down at her. Like everyone looks down at him. Like she's the virgin. And they're in Thailand. Elise left the show because she couldn't stay

Starting point is 01:15:09 in watching Colton date other women. Well, that's a bad show to be on. Yeah. I would say that if it's going to trigger you to watch your man go on dates with other women, the show that has your man go on a date with 20 other women is probably a bad place for you. It's good to know yourself, right?

Starting point is 01:15:25 Like know that you're jealous. Right. I guess I am the jealous type. I am the jealous type. Yeah. Don't move to Utah. That's a little tip. Onika called Nicole emotionally unstable

Starting point is 01:15:34 and Nicole called Onika a bully. Colton was so frustrated he had to take a walk on the beach and there was no rose ceremony last night. Oh my God. What? All because of Onika and Nicole. Damn. They ruined it for everyone.

Starting point is 01:15:46 Everyone. God damn it. You should have sent them both packing. Onika and Kelly? Nicole. Nicole? You're being betches. I said batch.

Starting point is 01:15:56 Not betches. Yeah. Betch. Wait, so one called the other one. Emotionally unstable. Okay. And the other one said? She's a bully.

Starting point is 01:16:03 All right. So reading into this a little bit, I feel like. I'm Tim Onika. I feel like the emotional one is actually the bully. Yep. And the bully is actually the emotional one. Yep.

Starting point is 01:16:13 I'm Tim Onika. So it's one of those I'm rubber or like, you know, you call the other person when you really are. You project to it. Yes. That's it. That's it. That sounds like a hell of an episode.

Starting point is 01:16:21 Wow. I think the rose ceremony was a big controversial moment. Yeah, you think it was? No rose ceremony ruins your Monday night, right Hank? Not mine. Okay. People that watch the shows. Next up we have Mann Card.

Starting point is 01:16:32 This is for a cougar that was killed by a Colorado runner in a reservoir area. Yeah. Reservoir open space. Horse tooth. That's a fucking badass name. Horse tooth reservoir open space. So the mountain line was actually choked out by the runner. Yes.

Starting point is 01:16:51 So Hank, play the reggaeton. Hi, I'm Joe Bach. Hand over your Mann Card. Yeah, we're taking that mountain line's Mann Card because you're a fucking wild animal. And you got killed by America's most docile creature, a jogger. Okay, but spin zone didn't tap. Good point.

Starting point is 01:17:13 Didn't tap. That's a very good point. Mann Card back on. Made it. No, if you don't tap and you were willing to die without tapping, I feel like you get a Mann Card. Okay. You died with your Mann Card. Compromise.

Starting point is 01:17:26 At the very least, Walmart should change all their mountain line branded knockoff Mountain Dew. I don't think that that deserves to have mountain lion on it anymore, but we'll give you the Mann Card back. Do the do. It possibly weighed at least 80 pounds. That's not that big. That's not a big cat.

Starting point is 01:17:40 The body of the big cat was taken to state health lab. We're giving it an autopsy now. Well, they did that because they thought the guy lied about it. So they checked its throat and it was crushed. So either this guy skull fucked the mountain lion to death or he choked it out. Damn. What a badass. Now, if he skull fucked the mountain lion to death, then Mann Card taken back from the mountain

Starting point is 01:18:00 lion. Yes. And that man's name? Jeff Fisher. Imagine if it was. It would be so awesome. It would be the greatest story ever. All right.

Starting point is 01:18:08 Guys on checks, we did all of our segments at the beginning. We cooked ourselves out of segments. So, some PMT boys, especially Hank. Hey, so my high school boyfriend and I are now juniors in college. For some reason, he will never go out with me and always wakes up before 6am to lift weights. He's not even that big. To mess with him, one of his friends and I always send pictures of us kissing at the bars and one of his other friends always hits on me right in front of him.

Starting point is 01:18:30 He never does anything about it. Also, one of his best friends hooked up with his little sister in high school. He never did anything about that either. What do I do? Wait, you sound really mean. Yeah. This is like, your boyfriend sounds like a really nice guy. It sounds like he's actually doing the right thing by avoiding you at all costs.

Starting point is 01:18:47 He takes, he gets up, he works on bettering himself and then all he gets in like payback is just you fucking all your friends? Or fake fucking them? Wait, but if it's, if she's doing it as a prank, then that's one thing. I don't know, that seems really mean. Although the, the part about him lifting and not getting bigger, like he should probably stop. Yeah. Like if you're going to lift, no one wants to be around the guy who lifts all the time

Starting point is 01:19:12 and still doesn't have muscles. Yeah. Like someone needs to step in and be like, hey bro, either start doing creatine or stop lifting. I think that there's an elegant solution to this problem here and that's just start making him take steroids and it solves the, the getting bigger problem and it solves the lack of aggression problem that he has with all these things. Great point. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:19:30 Thank you. Okay. Sup PMT boys, especially thick cat. So my boyfriend and I joke around a lot about having me call him daddy or his dirty little slut, but never have actually have during sex. I'm starting to think he actually wants me to though. I don't want to just say it during sex in case he's not and it kills the mood. How do I find out if he wants me to?

Starting point is 01:19:49 I think you just say it. I think you just say it and, and be like, this is, I'm, I'm claiming my sexuality by calling you my little slut to the guy. Or just start saying your own father's name during sex and see what happens there. A curve ball. And then be like, and when he's like, what? Like, oh, I meant daddy. Or you can start saying the heavenly father's name.

Starting point is 01:20:10 Just be like, oh God, oh God. Yeah. Yeah. I think I'll probably like that. Start with that. Try your dad's name though. Just a little fun. Keep it fun.

Starting point is 01:20:18 Sup guys, especially chunk cat. Damn. I recently got a friend-electomy and my tongue is longer now. Any tips or tricks on giving a better BJ? What? I think, I mean, why would you ask us that? Are you trying to, are you trying to be in kiss? What the fuck?

Starting point is 01:20:35 Like if you just got a friend-electomy, who does that? Then why would you need any more tips? And also why, what, what do you get a friend-electomy for? Are you like, she's like a snake. What if she got it forked so she could be like on both balls at once? I've seen that shit on the A and E, like that guy who became a porcupine or like a, oh no, the guy who became Sonic the Hedgehog and he had like spikes all over him. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:20:58 I think maybe just get another friend-electomy, make it extra longer. Guys like it, when chicks who have already had surgery on their tongues to make it longer, get another one to make it super long. This is like, you can do that surgery where you break every bone in your body and then they elongate it so you get taller? I've looked at that. I've looked into it. What do you think?

Starting point is 01:21:16 There's like an eight month recovery process and- Could you still podcast? You only get like three to seven extra inches off it, so I mean I'm already six feet tall. I'm already six feet, so I don't need to be like a freak. So I think I'm going to pass, but yeah, just get a long, even longer tongue. We should have actually, when Bubba got hit by that car, we should have been like, well, you're halfway, well, a quarter of a way there. Let's just break the rest of them and see how much longer you can get.

Starting point is 01:21:42 Apparently doctors in the U.S. won't even perform the surgery. What? You have to fly overseas for it. I've been told. What? That would have been cool. But then you just have really long shin bones and the rest of your body is the same size. Oh, is that true?

Starting point is 01:21:55 All legs, baby. Yeah. Well, I mean, I feel like my upper body is, it's also small. Sup boys? There's this guy I always see around and we flirt, but I never knew his name. Until yesterday after talking for a while, he finally introduced himself as the name of my most recent ex. Is this a total deal breaker?

Starting point is 01:22:14 No, it's a way to get back at him, right? It actually, yeah, a great way to get back at him. Although I could see some mishaps when it comes to sexting or texting. If the name's in the phone or similar. You don't have to change your tattoos? No, that's a good point. Yeah, I think it also kind of breaks down, there'll be a shorter getting to know you period because you feel like you already do.

Starting point is 01:22:34 Like every conversation feels familiar. And you won't have that awkward like you call your new boyfriend, your ex boyfriend's name. Mm-hmm. So that's pretty cool. But if his dad's not the same name, then she might accidentally call her new boyfriend, her old boyfriend's dad's name. True, true, true. Hey guys, especially Larry.

Starting point is 01:22:52 By the way, still alive. Larry, we are on Larry's seven. Is it Larry's seven? Six. Six. Larry's six is, I think, a week away from officially being the longest living Larry we've ever had. And coincidentally, it also is the only Larry we have personally not taken care of.

Starting point is 01:23:10 So you know what? All you people say we're bad goldfish owners. I'm sorry for resisting that thought. You were right. Turns out you were right. All we needed to do was just give our goldfish up for adoption. Right. So we left it at a firehouse in a little wicker basket with a blanket to make him comfortable.

Starting point is 01:23:26 And he's thriving. Yeah, this is a part of growing, though, as a podcast. We know our strengths and weaknesses, keeping animals alive, weakness. I've started dating a guy who was my close friend the last few years. He used to tell me all his crazy sex stories, the weirdest ones being from this happy ending massage parlor he would go to. How do I get over this? And is he still getting rubbing tugs?

Starting point is 01:23:47 Yes. The answer is yes. If you're a rubbing, I think once a rubbing tug guy always. It's a life thing. Blood and come in, come out. Yeah. You're eventually going to own a members only jacket and like a bunch of chest hair, maybe a couple of chains.

Starting point is 01:24:02 It's just you're going to start betting on high ally. Like there's a lot of things that come with that life and it's all, it's all coming. I didn't mean it that way, but it is all coming. Like you literally are always coming if you're a rubbing tug guy. I think he's probably also attracted to you because you know that about it. He probably thinks since you've heard all these stories that you're into him being a rubbing tug. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:24:23 So if you're not into it, that's something that I think you have to get notarized and just be like for the record, I would prefer it if you didn't. But you know, I prefer you not get jerked off by your masseuse. But I can't change you. Yeah. All right. Last one.

Starting point is 01:24:35 The cage of Songbird. I'm eight months pregnant and listen to PMT religiously. At this point, my baby can hear and comprehend noises outside of my belly. My question is, do I have to stop listening now so he or she doesn't come out, recognizing your voice is more than my husband's? No, I'd say you listen more. Yeah. Put the headphones right up on the belly.

Starting point is 01:24:53 Yeah. Put it up there right now. We're better, we're better dads than your husband. Yeah. Put it up there right now. I want to say something to the kid. San is not real. Okay.

Starting point is 01:25:03 The Texans will never win a Super Bowl. Don't feel bad about betting your pinky. We're your real fathers. Okay. Big Cat and I just mix our spews together. Stop, stop. Too much. Hey kid, forget we said that.

Starting point is 01:25:18 Okay. I was just kidding. Yeah, we were just kidding. We'll see you on Friday. Love you guys. It's Pardon My Take, presented by Barstool Sports.

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