Pardon My Take - NFL Week 1, Fastest 2 Minutes, We Recap Every Game From Sunday And Deshaun Watson Is The Worst QB Ever

Episode Date: September 9, 2024

NFL is back and we start with Fastest 2 Minutes (00:00:00-00:10:03). We then recap every game from Sunday Eagles 34, Packers 29 (00:10:03-00:23:11) Bears 24, Titans 17 (00:23:11-00:30:04) Bills 34, Cardinals 28 (00:30:04-00:35:19) Texans 29, Colts 27 (00:35:19-00:44:11) Dolphins 20, Jaguars 17 (00:44:11-00:58:21) Patriots 16, Bengals 10 (00:58:21- 01:10:20) Steelers 18, Falcons 10 (01:10:20-01:18:44) Vikings 28, Giants 6 (01:18:44- 01:24:49) Saints 47, Panthers 10 (01:24:49-01:34:19) Bucs 37, Commanders 20 (01:34:19-01:43:02) Cowboys 33, Browns 17 (01:43:02-01:55:11) Chargers 22, Raiders 10 (01:55:11-02:00:39) Seattle 26, Denver 20 (02:00:39-02:04:50) Lions 26, Rams 20 (02:04:50-02:06:18) We finish with Who's back of the week and a possible punishment for our gambling picks (02:06:18-02:33:12).You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. On today's Pardon My Take, week one is here. And we're ready to break down every single game from Sunday and Friday because we didn't talk about the Packers and the Eagles. We're going to do fastest two minutes to start the show. We've got who's back of the week. We're talking football start to finish,

nothing better. And it's brought to you by our friends at DraftKings. TD, Tuddy taking it to the house in for six, whatever you call it. Touchdown. One thing's for sure. Touchdowns matter more. DraftKings Sportsbook. An official sports betting partner, the NFL, on the ground, in the air from the special teams or defense. We don't care how they score them. We want to bet on touchdowns. And DraftKings is the number one place to bet touchdowns.

Ready to place your first NFL bet? Try betting on something simple like a player to score a touchdown. Go to DraftKings Sportsbook app and make your bet today. We have the the Jets versus the 49ers Monday Night Football. Garrett Wilson to score. Why not? I like Garrett Wilson to score. What do you what do you like? I like Breeze, Breeze Lightning, Breeze Hall. Okay. So if you're ready to do a touchdown dance your own new Draft King's customers bet five bucks to get 250 in bonus bets instantly and get one month of NFL Plus Premium. Download the DraftKings Sports Fork app and use code TAKE.

That's code TAKE for new customers to get 250 in bonus bets when you bet just five bucks and get one month of the NFL Plus Premium only on DraftKings. The crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. In New York, call 877-8HOPENY or text HOPENY467369. Only on DraftKings, the crown is yours. Kansas. 21 and over. Age varies by jurisdiction. Voighton, Ontario. Opt in each Sunday to get one no sweat bet based on amount of losing qualifying bet. Bonus bets expire 168 hours after issuance. PMT Sunday TD Parlay bets only to receive one profit boost.

For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see sportsbook.draftkings.com slash promos. Okay, let's go! Welcome to Part of My Take presented by DraftKings. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code TAKE. That's code TAKE for new customers to get 250 in bonus bets when you bet just five bucks and get one month of NFL Plus premium only on DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Monday, September 9th week one

Fumble We start in Indianapolis where Susan B Anthony Richardson is trying to put a stop to week one Colts fans suffrage when he hit Alec Paul Pierce With a 60-yard bomb making indie fans everywhere poop their pants with excitement Unfortunately, the Texans had other plans as Stefan Riggs welcomed all the haters to the course scoring twice on Sunday No word if he cried afterwards after being showed the door by the DN Cincinnati Bengals, Joe Biden mix improved he isn't actually dead as he had 159 yards without tripping over his feet once. Texans 29. Cults 27.

In western New York, after taking a couple early shots, Kyler Murray stepped up and stepped in. He is a gamer, giving Clark Gnolls an early 17-3 lead. Josh Tim Allen took out all the tools in his toolbox as the Bills hoped for some home improvement after last year. Keon I'm a Coal Man made his debut and speaking of souls, Damar Hamlin's is still alive as he got to start on the way to a win. Prayers for Demar, Boom. And no one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills! The Bills 34, the Cardinals 28. We go abroad to Brazil Friday night to our reporter who is not able to tweet himself, Max Celente. We go to Sao Paulo where we had a classic matchup between Love Hurts, Jalen Kersh head

eagles fans cussing at the TV early with two early turnovers in the first but Saquon was playing like a dog and brought the birds back to take the lead. Zach Bon Jovi was attacking the quarterback all night and many were saying, He gave love a bad game. With a chance to take the lead late in the fourth, Matt La One Score chose to kick a field goal and make a one score game a one score game. Eagles win 34-29. Thank you very much Max, beautiful singing.

Back stateside in Chicago, we're in a touching tribute to Jeremy Allen White. This season of the Bears is going to be taken a lot more serious than the previous two. Fans were uneasy watching the Bears offense, wondering if they fingernailed their first pick, but it was Jonathan Biles and the special teams that trampled them into scoring. Will Jan-Levis and Gould has gone snip-snap-snip-snap with the start of his career and it snapped more than it snipped on Sunday after throwing a large pic-tee-titty. Because she's got big tits, Teej. Jan-Levis and Gould, she's got big tits. That's where they got back together.

Bears 24, Titans 17. Down to Atlanta where they swapped Russie for Jussie. tits before they got back together. Bears 24, Titans 17. Down to Atlanta where they swapped Russie for Jussie and Ray, Ray, you, you get off of McCloud was working on a revenge game against the Steelers and speaking of revenge games, Bijon Robbins and Rush the Ball 18 times, Kyle Pidge scored a touchdown leaving slack-jawed R. Kersmith saying, I didn't know you could do that. Cam Johnson, whose name literally translates to Jeffrey Tubin, got knocked out of the punting game early,

but the special teams came to the rescue as balls well that ends well, after Chris kicked six field goals and a punt in relief. The Steelers, 18, the Falcons, 10. Let's head to Cincinnati, where we have Henry Lockwood on the scene for the big Patriots win. We head to the depths of the jungle of Cincinnati where Ramandre I want Iguodala Stevenson got the scoring started going early with the second quarter score. At halftime Joey Chestnut said Bratsommer

isn't over yet taking down 18 brats in 10 minutes beat six other people Gerard Mayo for Yale had his defensive line ripping all day Holding the Bengals to 10 points on his way to his first win as an NFL head coach Lighthouse 16 jungle 10. Thank you, Henry out west to Seattle where Denver is thinking This is the year, Bo Nix has improved so much under his new offense. He's focused, he's having fun, I wouldn't be surprised if he's Dark Horse for the MVP. The refs were something Gaz has never done as they sing, you can dance if you want to,

it's safe to dance, everyone do the safety dance as the Broncos got two safeties in the first half. Kenneth Brandon Walker asks the Seahawks fans, why are you hollering after a tough first half but then put the team on his back leading the Seahawks to a 26-20 win? Over to Tampa Bay as the Commies tried to limit price controls on all the inflated bucks. Mike Evans gate cult two touchdowns and looked like he was sailing through space on a comet as Commanders fans wanted to put on their new Nikes and pull over a big purple blanket on their faces, drifting off into the sweet embrace of the unknown. The Commanders cut the lead to 10 and Commie's head coach showed off his Danalytics by kicking an extra

point and cutting it to 9. Unlike the Miami Police Department, this Washington defense wasn't stopping anything at all as every Florida receiver made it into the end zone on time. Despite the efforts of the Supreme Court, this Baker was unstoppable. Meanwhile, the DC quarterback couldn't keep his helmet on as Jaden Daniels Day-Lewis went method acting as Nancy Reagan being very, very careless with his head. Tampa Bay buries the commander 37 to 20. Standing on a corner, Jameis Winston Cuyahoga, such a fine sight to see. Is that my Lord, can Jerry Jones afford to pay Dak Parsons NCD? Is that Tom

Brady? His hair's looking wavy. Keep DeShawn away from the huddle and the ladies. Cowboys 33, Brown 17. It's week one for singing too, boom. And that was week one, fastest two minute presented by our good friends at Chevy. There's a reason we've never done a Mount Rushmore pickup trucks and that's because for Pardon My Take, there's only one pickup truck, the Chevy Silverado. Silverado is a partner, a partner you can depend on. We've all spent time driving and using the Silverado for all kinds of part of my take jobs.

I was in the electric one, the EV the other day. It's incredible, massive screens, up to eight cameras with 14 different views to help make driving, towing, and parking all easier. We love the bold, blacked out look of the new Silverado HD Trail Boss. So head over to chevy.com to build your own Silverado or Silverado HD and check out all the current offers on

Silverado. Discover a world of strength and capability all behind the wheel of our favorite truck, the Chevy Silverado. Okay, week one in the books. We're watching the fourth quarter of the Rams-Lyons game as we tape this. We will do that game last. But boys, football is all the way back. It was great to be with the fellas in the gambling cave. I forget how much football happens at once. Just simultaneous football all day long. I also forget how quick it goes by because I feel like you just blink and then it's boom, Carrie Underwood in your face. It was great though to be back. I'm not going to complain about that.

No, no. Listen, it was a great Sunday. It was a lot of fun to be with the guys watching ball, every game going fast paced, witching hour. It's just great to be back. It's great to be back. So let's dive in, shall we? Should we do it? Let's do it.

Let's do it. So we're going to, if this is your first fall with us on Pardon My Take, we recap every single game from Sunday and this week, also from Friday because we obviously didn't talk about the Eagles 34-29 win against the Packers in Sao Paulo. Max, good win. Sometimes it's all right to win sloppy. Sometimes it's all right to win sloppy. I also should say, I should say before anything, thank God Jordan Love is not seriously injured

I think we all were rooting for that for him not to be seriously. Yeah for him to be for it to be nothing Yeah, it basically was nothing. He's gonna be back in three to four weeks I know that I was sitting in bed worried and I was just like, please hope he's okay and he's okay Yeah, he might be okay I don't know if the Packers are gonna be okay without him because Malik Willis got in for a Hail Mary and Yeah, at some point Malik Willis played quarterback in his career. Yeah at some point. He was thought highly For Liberty for Liberty. Is that real? The schedule was not great at Liberty. Yeah But yeah Malik at one point could throw a football and he didn't know how to throw a Hail Mary at the end of it

It was a weird scenario down in Brazil because you had the grass looking like the sod father, which just immigrated, like ran away from the law and was a fugitive down in Sao Paulo. The grass is not great. People were trying to blame the grass on Jordan Love's injury. I would say that's stupid. You should blame Jalen Carter for being dirty player. Yeah, dirty player trying to injure people.

I think that would be more the blame. The grass had nothing to do with that injury. You can blame the grass for making the game hard to watch, especially in the first half. But why don't they just change the cleats immediately? Why don't they go out for warmups and they're like, yeah, you know what? I'd have to wear the long cleats. I also love when people see the NFL playing on grass that shitty and then having this epiphany, where they say to themselves,

we have multimillion dollar athletes, a billion dollar corporation and we're sending them down to Brazil on this shitty field just for the almighty dollar. The NFL has no shame. They don't care about player safety. If it took you that long, if it took you until Friday night to figure out the NFL doesn't care about player safety, welcome to the party. We've been here for a very long time. Yeah, and ironically, Brazil is the last place I would expect to have a problem with too much grass on the field. Yeah. It seems like given their waxing strategies, that wouldn't be an issue. It's been apparent every time they send a team over to Germany or England, or now Brazil, Mexico City. We have football stadiums in the United States.

Yes. And now Brazil Mexico City we have football stadiums in the United States Yes they have football stadiums in the other countries and they have to put new turf down every single time and then they act shocked that the new turf Installation wasn't up to par for NFL games. They have that little they have little 120 pound People running around barely running around kicking a ball around well, then you put a 300 pound man on the field Trying to tackle each other. Yeah, it's gonna look different I know Neymar flops pretty hard when he hits the ground. He'll roll over like four or five times So I'm vindicated. Maybe he wasn't flopping this whole time. Maybe you should grass shitty grass Yeah, shitty grass. He's been having him do this. It was yeah

It was kind of a sloppy game for a little bit Jalen Hurts had his ups and his downs I think we can say that the tush push that was Travis. There was Jason Kelsey. It's been nerfed It was Jason Kelsey that was responsible for the tush push. It was his tush Yeah, I was doing most of the push and yep, and in nerf. It's been it's been completely nerfed right now I don't know if they're well, they did they did steal our phrase for it and call it the Brazilian butt lift Yes, I saw that must credit Max do you now finger pointing at at you, gun pointing at you, do you now realize that we actually weren't joking when we said

that Nick Wright was kind of genius for saying that Jalen Hurst should have thrown more interceptions in preseason because, in training camp, because he looked shitty. No he didn't. Yeah, dude, he- Max, he looked bad. Come on, Max.

He had bad moments and then he had good moments. Yeah, but he had some really bad moments. But saying a shitty he's not for to throw a shitty pick. He's having a good game He the the fumble wasn't his fault you can there was moments that he had there were bad moments that he had there But this is not what max was saying on Friday night I well, yeah, cuz overreacting but now the touch on past the Saquon was very touched on past the Saquon was a perfect. I was okay so there you go that was good yeah he looked rusty he had some bad moments he had some good moments. Saquon's pretty awesome though. Saquon is the best. Do you think like if if the New York Giants had to do it all over again do you think

that they would give Daniel Jones a massive contract extension and let Saquon Barkley walk on a low ball? No, that was one of those embrace debate we thought was stupid in the in the moment in the mind even hindsight in the moment. That was just you guys are dumb in the moment. But yeah, Max, I, I feel like I mean, that was the I think we talked about it on Friday show. But the new defensive coordinators whenever you're trying to install a new system, you're

going to have weird moments. It almost felt like a college game at points where there was just receivers running wide open down the field on both sides because they both were new defensive coordinators. A win's a win. The Eagles are loaded. I think the Eagles are going to be a problem this year. I know that there's Jalen Hurts, there's some question marks, you even have them yourself. But yeah, the Eagles are good.

Yeah, it was a good win. It was a good win. It was a weird game. They travel 10 hours to get there. Well, not going to overreact after week one. I wish Hurts played a little bit better, but he played well enough to win the game. Yeah, you guys got to win. That's big. And if you're a Packers fan, you're probably happy that love, obviously happy that it's not worse than what it sounds like. But for the next month or so, you've probably got some questions

about whether or not Malik Willis is the guy. But thankfully Jordan Love's okay. Is Malik Willis the answer to any question that's ever been asked? Is there a really good guy that you would want to help someone on the street? If I was homeless, would name one NFL quarterback

that you would like to see come around the corner with a handful of windbreakers and sweatpants and maybe a Tupperware filled with food. Malik Willis, probably that guy. If I was looking for, hey, what's one of the cool names of a player in the NFL? Malik Willis. Yeah, name one NFL player whose name sounds a lot better than he is. Yeah, Malik Willis.

Malik Willis is probably one A. He is the answer to that question. Also very fun story for this game was all the beat reporters sending their stories or their tweets back to the states for their wives and significant others to tweet out. Yep. That was a really cute story that completely just forgot about saying the part where they decided to play a game in a dictatorship.

Yeah. It was like, this is so cute. The wives are tweeting it back from like Philly and Wisconsin. Yeah. Oh yeah. But why? Oh yeah, because we played in a dictator is running Brazil. Bolsonaro has been hospitalized with an acute case of NFL fever.

It's life threatening. Yeah. It was funny to see, Sal Palantoni was down there. And so I wonder, like, these guys, if they're sending texts to their wives back home, and then their wives are tweeting them out, their wives also probably reading like all the DMs and oh yeah so I wonder if anybody was sliding in the South Palace wife's DM I hope they got a little bit of the mentions too yeah just getting to live one day in in in your

husband's or wives mentions yeah like wow this is the shit they deal with you piece of shit you hate the Eagles you always have you know you said this guy's who injured he's back out there Eagles fans are pretty reasonable I don't think I love that one Eagles fan who is at the big statue of Jesus Christ just a Brazilian just out there on a on a Friday seeing Eagles fans in the wild they have to be like what is going on What is this? He's got the mohawk the face ain't that Christ the Redeemer They're just screaming at random people to do this chant. I guess soccer culture is very similar But still there's something about Philadelphia that just makes it extra special and in your face. Oh Philadelphia travels Oh that that could be just a travel show in general find the biggest Philly scumbag and just send them abroad Yeah, as many places as possible. I don't understand, you couldn't pay me to go like,

abroad for a football game when I could just watch it on TV. On TV, at home. And also miss the rest of the football game. I guess Friday you don't, but like, the London game where you just can't watch the rest of the games? Yeah, that stinks. I do love, as a fan though, we had a game Thursday, we had a game Friday, we had college football

all day Saturday, we had NFL Sunday Thursday. We had a game Friday. We had college football all day Saturday We had NFL Sunday then NFL Monday night. Yeah, that's a that's a pretty good five days of yeah watching on TV No, I'm gonna Tuesday's gonna come and I'm gonna be I'm gonna be Wrenched over my toilet just puking having withdrawals. Yeah, it's gonna be tough, but we can make it through Yeah, we can make it through we always do if Thursday coming back up Max Do you think it's kind of a cuck move for the Philadelphia Eagles to wear black on their uniforms instead of green because they're afraid That the local fans don't like the color green. I Don't think that they said that that's what that's that's the report. Yeah, I don't think that

No, I heard that from from several reporters wives. Yeah, I don't I don't think that was confirmed anywhere, so. Yeah. Okay, well good win, Max. Great win. Yep, one and a half. You beat the Packers. I was very upset at you for a while during that game that you weren't gonna beat the Packers. Also, our good friend Matt LaFleur, he kicked a field goal down one score to go down one score.

Yeah, in the fourth quarter. In the fourth quarter. Late. It's kinda his thing. I kind of I understood it a little bit more. Wait, they ended up losing. How much they lose by five, five, five. Yeah. I but they were they kick the field goal to go down to two. I get it a little bit more because then you can win with a field goal. But I'd still rather score or try to convert on fourth down and score. Yeah, you want it. You want six six there you want six at the end of that drive down when you're down five you want six Can we just recklessly speculate who you'd want to see?

Step in for the Packers. Yeah, Ryan Tannehill Ryan Tannehill you want you you want to see him? Yeah, you really want to see Ryan Tannehill more Ryan Tannehill. I would like to Packers to lose you would like I want Ryan Yeah, Hill to step in for the Packers. Actually, I want Malik Willis I think you got to give him at least four games. Give him a shot You don't want to hurt Malik's confidence. No, you don't want him to think that he's not the answer. Yeah I would like to see Flacco should have waited. Joe Flacco shouldn't have. Brett Favre could play. Brett Favre could play. Just let him play

I was thinking about Favre yesterday and there's a good chance that he didn't go anywhere because he's like, I got to be close to home base in case the phone rings. There's a pretty good chance that he had Edwarder just call the Packers and say, hey, are you hearing anything about Brett? Yeah. But he was put up to it. Brett Favre just tweets out out of nowhere, just so so you know all my court cases are up in jeopardy right now I won't be sentenced to anything for at least another nine months. I could travel out of state. I could try

I'm not currently wearing an ankle monitoring system. Brett Favre would do it. I think if you asked him he would yeah for sure Mafflin Mafflin Blake Bortles Blake Bortles out Packers legend and has yeah Matt Matt will floor knows him really Joe Flacco has become a very valuable Valuable trading piece right now. They should let Joe Flacco just go from team to team every every week It's it you have to drop Joe Flacco and then he gets picked up. Yeah, Jamis. Yeah, Jamis Jamis But I that would break me. No, I can't we can't have that and then I would just that would keep out break me I don't want that. Let's just get out. We will. Let's get ahead of Florio and say Colin Kaepernick. Yeah. The Green Bay Packers.

He's ready to go. Only been eight years since he's played. I'm sure he's done a workout in a closed workout that Florio has gotten wind of in the last couple of months. Yeah. He's looking just as good as ever. Can we just put out the report? Part of my take is reporting that Colin Kaepernick is in consideration by some? To be the Green Bay Packers bridge quarterback. Yes, I'll join love returns. What what is who is their third quarterback right now? Oh, they don't have one. Hmm. You gotta have Malik Willis Malik Willis He's got to be the guy the emergency quarterback should just be a lottery of all Packers owners.

That's something that you get when you buy the piece of fake stock. Yeah. I am a Packers owner, actually. One Green Bay Packers owner, or the Green Bay Packers owner, is considering bringing in Colin Kaepernick. There it is. Me. You heard it right there.

Okay. Should we go to the Sundays games? Sundays games. Bears 24, Titans 17. The Bears are 1-0. They did not score an offensive touchdown. Caleb Williams looked really bad, but the Bears are 1-0 and I don't give a fuck. Well, I do actually care a little bit because I really wish he had played better because he was not good. He was not good. He looked like nothing really worked. You could like the best case scenario you could say is Okeen and Allen dropped a touchdown. because he was not good. He was not good. He looked like nothing really worked. You could like the best case scenario you could say is Okina and Alan dropped the touchdown.

He did. But other than that, the offense was bad. But this is also why I was so excited about this season and said over and over that Cale Williams is going into a better situation than any Bears quarterback ever was partially because the defense and the defense was awesome and the defense completely bailed and special teams bailed the Bears out and I'm just I had the biggest sigh of relief when that game ended because this would have been the longest week of my life if the Bears had lost that game with the way Caleb Williams played and then having to play the Texans on Sunday night football. Yeah Caleb didn't play great but he also didn't lose the game for you. No, he didn't make any picks. So that's nice because in the past you've played these games where your defense and special teams have played lights out.

Yeah, and then you're like if we just had a guy that wouldn't lose the game for us, we'd be fine. That's what Caleb did today. He did look nervous, especially in the first half. No, he didn't look good. He said himself he's like I played bad. He was like falling away from throwers. He looked uncomfortable and that's probably just nerves. And it's funny because they asked him whether or not he was nervous about week one. And he said, no, I've never been nervous in my entire life. I don't get nervous. I'm just right now feeling like I'm very anxious to get out there and play and I don't want to let anybody down.

And he just went on to perfectly describe what feeling nervous was. Yeah. But he just didn't say, he's like, I'm not nervous. I'm just very, very worried about not playing well. And he also probably said that he was not nervous because he had never played in an NFL game behind the Bears offensive line. Yeah. There were some plays where, I mean, that one sack he took, he probably shouldn't have

spun three times, but he also, it was over right away. I'm okay when quarterbacks spin three times, but when you spin, you have to actually like move to the side when you spin. Yeah, or forward. He was just spinning, like he was like trying to make himself dizzy. The idea of the spin move is to spin away from something. Yeah, but I'm not, I'm not going to sit here and say, oh, the offensive line is to blame.

The offensive line was bad and that's a concern for me. It was a concern going into the season. The run game did not look great. Uh, it couldn't really get going forward. Caleb played bad, but the Bears won and one and O is one to know and I'm not going to apologize for one to know. And that defense is so goddamn good. And that's what's making me like the most excited and Caleb will figure it out. I got, so it was 17, nothing at halftime and I was getting very down and going to a dark place. Also, by the way, Viles Jones just lives to

torture me. He, at some point, a guy just being the fastest guy, you have to have more than that. And unfortunately, the more for Viles Jones is he also fumbles. So he's the fastest guy, but also fumbles. he's the fastest guy but also fumbles Mm-hmm that those are his two defining traits But that was when it was started to get really bad when he just I was like a comic book If you saw the dots, you know, you can watch we replay the dots. They do the graph He kicked the ball forward 20 yards. It was crazy. So Viles Jones, I really need him to, to not be in my life anymore.

But PFT, I have something for you because I was doing this, uh, when I got really in a dark place. I went and started looking it up. Uh, here are the guys who lost their first start in the NFL. Okay. Troy Aikman. Good. Peyton Manning. Good. These are all guys that were on Mount Rushmore. Yeah. Dan Marino. Yep. Joe Montana. Pretty good. Eli Manning. Yep. Matthew Stafford. These are all future Hall of Famers.

And. Eli Manning, future Hall of Famer? Yeah, Eli Manning will be in the Hall of Famer. Okay. Are you kidding me? Who runs the league, dude? Yeah, that's true. I mean, get out of here.

Oh man, golf just threw a bad pick and the Lions might lose and that will be a bad, that'll be a sad boy move for me. We have a new stat that's going around though now. It's not the Peyton Manning interception stat. It's the John Elway first start stat. Yes. Would he go like two for 10 or something?

Yeah, or 11. Yeah. And then he got benched immediately after that. That's a good stat. I like, that's a good comforting, nice comforting stat to look at when your quarterback's not playing well. It was, it was a bad game. I also have another stat and again, I'm not going to make excuses for

a bad game, but this is maybe it's preseason, lack of preseason, lack of training camp, whatever you want to call it. Oh, is that pick? Is that going to count? Do you know on Sunday, now the NFL is a passing league. It's a passing league, right? On Sunday, there was only one quarterback who threw for over 300 yards. That's a passing league, right? On Sunday, there was only one quarterback who threw for over 300 yards. That's pretty crazy. That is pretty crazy. That was two of them. One of them was just an 80 yard pass to Tyree Killadude, everything else. And then there was only two quarterbacks who threw over 250 yards. So the passing was just bad on Sunday overall.

There was one, two, three, four, five quarterbacks that threw for 200 to 250 yards. So, and then everyone else was under 200 yards. And then there was Caleb Williams who had 93 yards. But passing was down overall. Passing was down. Defenses are ahead of offenses in week one. Yeah, I mean, some of these numbers, Justin Herbert threw for 144 yards, Kirk Cousins for 155,

so here's Lawrence for 162. Here's the stat right here. John Elway's first start. He was one for eight, 14 yards, a pick, four sacks, no Russian yards, but they won. All of fame. But they know he wasn't on my list. Yeah. Yeah. So I wins win I'm not gonna I'm not gonna apologize for wins, but god damn it I'm so happy they won because that would have been a torturous torturous week of discourse about Caleb Williams because he played bad Caleb will be better. He's a good player. Yes. I've seen him play better. I've seen him make throws I know that he's a good quarterback. He'll be better. The defense and the special teams won't need to do as much to help them win. But maybe they will. Maybe they will. Maybe they'll do it anyways.

Yeah. Maybe they'll do it anyways. And Will Levis had a day to forget. Let's just leave it at that because that throw, he did the surrender Cobra in mid play. Yeah. On his knees. On his knees. Yeah. He threw that one. Looked like he was putting the scrunchie on. That was just one too many like, hey, I'm just going to try to, he threw that one. Look like he was putting the scrunchie on. That was just one one too many like hey I'm just gonna try to he was already in trouble Just throw it up there and that was the game right there because it was the pick six and then our

Explosive offense got a two-point conversion. Will Levis does not give a fuck if he gets hit. No. That dude throws his body He was gonna back brace for half a game. They put the heating pad on over his like uniform. Yeah I don't know if that works. I don't think that it does. No. But yeah, he was getting banged out. Unfortunately for Will, that surrender cobra is going to be around for a long time. It was very tough mid-play.

Okay, next game. Bills 34, Cardinals 28. I'll tell you what, the haters had a moment. The haters had a moment because Josh started his season with a fumble in the red zone and the Cardinals were up quickly 17-3. They had scores. He had two touchdowns throwing two touchdowns rushing He's now tied all time with Steve Young for multiple touchdowns throwing and rushing in a game. That's pretty good He was jumping over people he landed on the ball at some point and may have broken his left hand Yeah, but he was basically like I don't really care if my left hand is broken. Yeah, I don't throw my left hand He was awesome after that the start. I mean the fumble was like, Oh God, what just happened? Like red zone, Josh Allen, don't do that. And then he was yet 17 for 22 and 222 2028 yards throwing. He was awesome. He was doing

Superman plays. Yeah. The bills defense didn't look great for the most part. No, they're working progress, but they are. I feel like we say that every year about the Bills. Yeah. Well, who was on that told us it was actually good that they got all their injuries out of the way? Because last year it was like, oh, they lost Matt Milano in the middle of the season or a couple games in. This year they lost him in training camp, so they already know. This year they didn't even have enough time to get accustomed to having Matt Milano on

the defense to feel the impact of losing him. They didn't have Trudevius White as their cornerback and rely on Correct. To feel the impact of losing him. They didn't have Trudevius White as their cornerback and rely on him enough to feel the impact of losing him. So yeah, that means that the other guys just won't get injured because they've already used up all their injuries on this season. Yes, exactly. It's a good point.

It's a good point. And if you're a Bills fan, you're just happy to escape with a win. I saw that they did set up a DUI checkpoint on the way out of the stadium. Oh, man. Directly out of the stadium. They're trying to generate some revenue up in Orchard Park.

That's a tough scene for a lot of Bills fans. That's essentially when they have the videos of the Bears, the Grizzly Bears, and the salmon are all spawning and swimming upstream. They just can put their paw in and they pull out 10 salmon. That's what that was. There will be a Bills fan that goes to court and says that this is entrapment. Yeah. I was at a Bills game. Yeah. And I'm not going to get. Bills home opener.

I'm not going to get drunk at a Bills home opener, your honor. That was the, uh, by the way, the Cardinals, I, I said it before the season started, but the Cardinals are going to be my official. This is just a fun watch team because Kyler looked awesome. Their defense is not great. They didn't even get Marvin Harrison going. Marvin Harrison's wide open on that one play though. James Connor is still the angriest, most upright runner that got ever created. And yeah, I think they're just officially a fun team to watch. They're going to play hard. We know that. They

did that last year. They'll knock you around on defense. They'll be physical and Kyler looked good Kyler was making a bunch of good plays in the first half at least he had some jump passes Some weird angles he was scrambling around looked real cute out there. I do think he got a little shorter It's a white okay the white the white made him look shorter. Yeah, there was one run I was like damn sure well you forget how short he is Yeah After like nine months of not seeing Kyler Murray ever Now you see him and you're like, holy shit that dude. He's he looks out there He looks like he's five five when he's on the field. Yeah, it's the way that his head little his little head bobbles around

Yeah, and he kind of he runs kind of side to side like a tile going forward. Yes, like yeah Yeah, but good win for the Bills because I know that there was probably some Bills mafia That was a little nervous there when it was 17 to 3, and they're like, what's going on? We also got a kick return, which was fun, because we were promised more kick returns, and we got one. That was cool, especially if you bet the Cardinals, like I did. Yeah, it was a fun play. It's fun when it works, when they actually run it out.

In order to make teams stop just trying for touchbacks every time they have to what you get the ball to 30 down Touchback yeah, it goes out of the back of the end zone. They got a they gonna make it worse They gotta say you get the ball at 35 if it goes out of the well And we also saw more kicks out of bounds Going to the 40 because I feel like kickers are trying to be more precise with it They're trying to get cute they fuck it up the one guy that has the hang of that, B.A. from the Cowboys. Yeah. Well, he's, he is the guy. He's the new guy. Aubrey is the guy. Yeah. He's Justin Tucker's no longer the guy. I mean, we're going to get to Cowboys game, but that 66 yarder that he nailed, I can't

believe they didn't let him try a 71. 71 would have been fun. Kickers, are kickers too good? Kickers got really, really good. And we tried to fuck with their psychology by backing up the extra point to make the extra points no longer. Gimmies actually missable. And then they just stepped their game up after that. Kickers, they're too good. If you look at how good kickers were in the, in the mid to late nineties compared to today, it's unreal how much better they are. And we thought that kickers in the nineties were really,

really good because they weren't like The old-fashioned guys that you know like smoking cigarettes on the sideline part-time mechanics They step out there and they toe poke it from the 60s But kickers are just really really good now And I think it's even going bleeding into the college game like there I've seen some kickers make 50 plus yarders in the college game, which she feels like it never happens Yeah, and if I've seen a bunch of them this year. Well, now we've got them going to camps when they're like eight years old.

Yeah, and Australia's just pumping them out. Yeah. Left and right. Okay. Next up, Texans 29, Colts 27. The 11-year streak continues. So this is officially 11th year. The Colts have lost their week one game, which

is pretty shocking, pretty crazy. But that, I mean, they, they were in this game. Anthony Richardson, I guess I would say I see it because how can you not when he had probably the most impressive throw of the day where he slipped and still through a 60 like recovered and through a 60 yard dime to Alec Pierce which went 65 yards in the air but he also only completed nine passes. Did you really? Yeah. It's not for 19 for 212 yards and he had a 60 and a 54 yard touch. Yeah because I was gonna say I distinctly remember another another long pass that he completed. Yes, but he's fun. He's really really fun to watch I see I see the vision. I just don't know if it will work and he ran

He did a good job running with the ball to yeah still took a lot of hits I feel like that's just something that he's gonna do if you're Colts fan I think you can put away the fantasy of We need to have Anthony Richardson learn to take care of his body more. I don't think that's gonna happen I think what you have is an awesome quarterback who's very fun to watch and will put himself in harm's way all the time. I don't think you're gonna change him.

I think that's kinda who he is. Cause they probably spent the last 12 months telling him, hey, we need you to be more careful with your body when you're running with a football. And he's like, no, I got it, I got it. And then he gets out of the football field, he's like, no, fuck everybody. I'm gonna run through And then he gets out of the football field. It's like, no, fuck everybody. Yeah. I'm going to run through people. Yeah. So that's just road. I'm going to throw absolute rockets. I'm going to throw

bombs and then I'm only going to complete nine passes. Yeah. I did not know that he only completed nine. I want to double check because maybe I have it wrong. I'm pretty sure you went nine for 19, which is a crazy stat line given the two touchdown passes that he threw that were awesome to watch. I mean that one too, if you, I consider myself a doubter of Anthony Richardson, but watching that throw that he made to Alec Pierce, I get it. I get how you can be like, if we can just figure out a way to get this guy to be consistent. Yeah. Nine for 19 for nine for 19. If we can get find a way to get him to be consistent and make the short passes as well as he makes the long passes. I understand being like this is worth the project because very few guys have what he did on that throw. Yeah, but we know what he is like as someone who's not a fan. Well, I guess technically I kind of in the fam a season ticket holder for the Colts, but without any real skin in the game, he's a guy that if he's playing on one of the side TVs, I'm going to spend a disproportionate amount of my time watching every snap that

he takes on offense. Yes. Because he's very fun. And when he does, when he takes off or if he uncorks one, it's like you want to watch this guy play live. Yes. The other big story from this game is Joe Mixon is still good. He had 159 yards rushing.

But the bigger story is Joe Mixon is an absolute psycho. He went no gloves, which was maybe the hardest thing you can do as a running back. No gloves. Nick Chubb does that, right? Nick Chubb does that. Sometimes he tapes his fingers a little bit. I mean I just I get hurt thinking about that like getting you get stepped on you're at the bottom of the pile you have no glove I know the gloves don't stop if someone steps on you gloves aren't gonna stop it but it feels like it was gonna stop you know what I mean? It feels better holding the ball you get right in on skin contact if you wear a glove it's like taking a raincoat with a shower. Right. It's very intimidating it's what's the guy guy from the Bengals that does

that? Defensive end, he was on the Saints. Hendrickson. Hendrickson. He also goes no gloves, but on the defensive side. Maybe crazier. It's just a crazy move no matter what. I know this will make no sense, but I sleep with a shirt on because I always think like what if someone like If an emergency happened someone shot me I'd rather have a shirt on Not that it would stop it, but it would probably make it feel a little bit better And then when if they take your body out on a stretcher, yeah, they're like, oh that guy looks good

Yeah, he's wearing a shirt. Oh, he's got together golf just tried to throw another interception and it was dropped We'll get to this game, but that just happened interception and it was dropped. We'll get to this game, but that just happened. But yeah, Joe Mixon, Gloveless. Gloveless is a good- Is hard as fuck. It's a good look and CJ Stroud still good. Still very good. Still very, very good.

Yeah, but the scary thing from watching this game was that the Texans, if Joe Mixon runs like that, their offense can't be stopped. Yeah, Texans are all in. Yeah, I also, there was a true like wild boys moment between the two coaches because we had the Texans with I don't know three minutes left up two decided on the fourth and goal on the two yard line, went for it when they could have kicked a field goal and got up five. They went for

it, got it. It was like, holy shit, that was crazy. You go up five there every time so that you can't lose the field goal. And then the Colts did the same thing where they were down nine with like a minute and a half left on the fourth and two on the goal line. And they went for it and got it. Neither one made sense to me but they both worked. They were just going both fuck it mode. Yeah because like Shane Stikin if you don't get that the game's over if you get the field goal I guess I guess I understand. I like going for the touchdown there because you're at you're at what the four yard line? Yeah you're gonna then yeah the chances of you getting that close right after you if you

get the ball back pretty low. So I like that move. They both were just wild. Then D'Amico Ryan's yeah like I I guess do it. I mean, you have CJ Stroud, if you have a play that you love, because the play did work perfectly and it was very open. Yeah. Also shout out to the Colts fans when we gave away the tickets for this week. We didn't know if anybody was going to have a Joe Flacco Colts jersey. We thought, we thought maybe those wouldn't exist yet. I think we got five or six sent to us. So shout out to EWLs for picking up the Flacco jerseys early. Yeah. It's very impressive. Yeah. I, yeah, this game,

I mean it was a hard fought game. The Texans are good. They're really, really good. I don't know. I'm going to probably find out how good they are on Sunday night. Well, you remember last year, week one, you remember what game that was for the Texans? It was Texans Ravens. Yeah. And CJ Stroud looked bad week one. And everybody was like, no idea if CJ Stroud is going to be any good at all.

Looked like maybe not. And then a lot of things can happen. I say that maybe just because I lost week one. And I'm trying to remind myself things can change. Things can change. Things changed a lot for the Texans last year. Yeah. It's actually shocking shocking the Colts

So the only other thing I would say about Anthony Richardson is his boomer bust the Texans had time possession 40 minutes that's a lot of minutes. Yeah, double the minutes. Yeah 40 minutes to 20 minutes Maybe some more of those there's 11 passes that incomplete. Yeah, but that also is one or two more of those That's also a compliment to Joe Mixon because they just were able to pound the rock. Are running backs back? They might be. I think running backs might be back.

Do you think the Bengals would have kept Joe Mixon if he had said, hey, I'm gonna go no gloves next year? Yes. You have to. Because he's a psycho. It's a crazy move. 30 rushes for 159 yards. Yeah, bring back to Belkow. He was a crazy move. 30 rushes for 159 yards. Yeah. Yeah. Bring back the bell cow.

He was a bell cow today. He was a big time. I love that term. I don't even know what a bell cow is. Hank, what's a bell cow? It's cow with a bell. Yeah. Why do they why do they say bell cow? Oh, come on. I this guy won two bronze medals and we're doing the celebration. That seems like a lot. Who was that? I don't know. It was a long distance runner. It was the first time we medaled in that. Oh yes. That's right. You're right. You're right. Okay. That guy actually is a bad ass because we don't win. White American dude doesn't isn't known for long distance. He basically won two gold medals. Yeah. he beat the Kenyan. Yeah, he that you're right. I remember that story. And I was like, how the fuck is he doing this? Okay. Good call memes. Yeah, Hank, what's a bell cow?

Why is it why is a bell cow running back that gets the ball? Like 40 times? Bell cows pace the herd and model the way to go. Okay, so they lead it's a cow... Do they have a bell on them? I think a lot of the cows do because you gotta be able to hear where they're going. Like when they're out in the pastures, you wanna be able to bring them back. Yeah.

Yeah, that's what I always thought. It's like, so you don't lose your cow. But this cow is wearing a bell so the other cows don't lose him. Got it. It's an alpha, It's an alpha cow. Wait, isn't that what the dog is for? The cattle dog is for?

It herds them. But I think sometimes you don't need a herding dog if you have a strong enough leader. If you got a true alpha. Are these correct, Hank? These are all correct? Okay. All right, should we do next game? Dolphins 20, Jaguars 17. So Tyre Kill, pulled a Scotty Scheffler, got detained, not arrested. Marlin's man quickly

texted me and called me to tell me that he wasn't actually arrested, he was just detained. Yep. Shout out Marlin's man, he had had it first The police officer is on administrative leave right now Yep, the one that I guess took him out and took him to the ground were any pants harmed We don't know if the pants were harmed yet So I'm I'm waiting for all the facts to come out before I comment on that but it is it's interesting to notice that on both the morning that Scottie Scheffler was arrested and Tyreek Hill was taken out of his car. And where are you going? Jeff Darlington was the first to report on both of them.

Mm-hmm. That's interesting. I don't know what, big guy, have you seen the movie with Jake Gyllenhaal? Called Nightcrawler? There's a lot of them. Called Nightcrawler? I don't, I have not. Where he's a journalist who always happens to be first on the scene. I've heard about it.

Because he's trying to impress Rene Russo? Yeah. And he crosses trying to impress Rene Russo. Yeah. And he crosses some journalistic lines. I'm not saying that Jeff Darlington is calling these arrests in. But I am saying that I might say that if it happens again. I'd agree. No one is more on the scene when an athlete gets arrested

mere hours before a game or a golf match. Yeah. It's also impressive how fast Scott Boris got there. Oh, he was. Drew Rosenhouse? Drew Rosenhouse came out of the bushes. And Kaleus Campbell was also there. He also was detained momentarily trying to break it up.

But yeah, it was a very weird start to the day, because I don't know how you guys reacted to it, but when I saw that video, I was like, this is, there's no way this is either him or this just Happened and then Shafts are was like yeah, this just happened. I thought it was maybe a collab with I show speed Yeah, the streamer that guy how's that guy not pro I show speed. Yeah He's freak athlete. He does everything jump over everything. He does. He's he's an insane athlete. Why is he not pro in? Anything he probably makes more money streaming.

Probably. Definitely. But he's so, he beats everyone in races. He's a freak athlete. He jumped over two cars. Yeah. Back to back. Yeah.

Pretty impressive. Yeah, it was very strange, but at the same time, if you had asked me which NFL player would I have not been shocked to find out got a race on the way to the stadium. Correct. Given his past, I probably on the way to the stadium. Correct. Given his past, I probably would have said Tyreek Hill would be one of the first ones. But it seems like maybe he was speeding. You have to be speeding pretty fast in Miami to get arrested.

I would imagine his car was probably something that people would be like, wow, that's a weird car and it's going really fast. I never understood that when people have not even a Lambo but one of those weird cars remember the three wheel cars people have and they just go fast cops like alright we're gonna take this guy and we want they probably want to look at the car if he was if he was speeding that fast though to get arrested he should just kept going

into the stadium yeah and by the time he got to the security guard they're like sorry cops you can't come in. Yeah I got a game. Man's going to work but yeah Drew Rosenhouse was on the scene he was on the sidelines immediately being like my client did nothing wrong. Yeah and yeah I think he had two or three clients that were at the scene and he just kept saying my client showed up and saw that my client had been detained by the police and then my client called me and I told my client Drew Rosenhouse he obviously had a lot to deal with this morning but you know he fucking loves being on TV he loves being the guy that they go to to ask questions. Yeah and say my client did nothing wrong.

But then Tyreek obviously had the incredible 80 yard touchdown did the handcuff touchdown celebration which was very cool he had to do that. This game though to me was just the most Jaguars game possible. There's one sequence in particular yeah with the Jaguar yeah and it was it was a touchdown that turned into was an interception? No it was Travis ATN they were up 17 to 7 and he was running in basically free for a touchdown to go up 24 to 7. He got stripped. They got the, they got the, the dolphins recovered in the end zone. And then the very next play was Tyree kills 80 yard touchdown down the sideline. Yeah. And so it went from a 24,

a potential 24 walk in touchdown 24 seven game to a 17 14 game in the matter of like three minutes. And that was it. That was it for the Jaguars. They went turnover on downs for playing a punt and a three and out as their last three drives. And that was it. They just, they just Jaguar and you said that that two was the only 300 yard quarterback today, which is crazy because it didn't look that good No, no, they look clunky as an offensive unit. I think I think there was Every team kind of looked clunky as an offensive unit. I think the only team I don't even know who who looked who looked incredible offensively

But Dak wasn't like lighting it up lighting it up I actually the one team who looked really good offensively. The Bucks. Yeah, the Bucks. Baker looked awesome. The Bucks. I have a feeling. I apologize.

No, no, no, no. I didn't mean to do that. No, we can get to it. I am not gonna take any offense at all in saying that the commander's defense stunk. Yeah, but yeah, they look clunky. The one thing I did take away though that's not fair that the Dolphins decided to do

is that A-Chain is now a receiver. Yeah, he's very good at it. He caught seven passes for 76 yards. That's not fair. They shouldn't be allowed to do that. They should be like, hey, you can't be a receiver too, dude. This is just too much speed. So yeah, the Jaguars are just, I mean, Trevor Lawrence was three for seven for 37 yards in the second

half. I don't know what they were doing. I think Chaps told us that they threw one pass after Etienne's fumble in the end zone. And it was just so Jaguars. They were scared. It was so Jaguars. They were playing scared out there. Yeah, they even, so the fumble happened.

Then Tyree kills 80 yard touchdown. Then Doug Peterson decided to go for it on fourth and one from his own 30 and he got stuffed now the Dolphins missed the field goal but it was just a horrific horrific 10 minutes for the Jaguars that buried them and it feels like it's similar to last year where you like that one pass that I think it was to Gabe Davis that Trevor Lawrence made in the back of the end zone. It was perfectly timed. Those things happen where like Trevor Lawrence is the guy and then the Jaguars just become the Jaguars again and just fall over themselves. That might have been Brian Thomas.

That was the Brian's. I'm Gabe Davis did have a pretty good day today. Yeah. Yeah, it was a perfect pass. You're like, oh man, the anticipation. He just threw it right to where he was going to end up. But yeah, the Jaguars are the Jaguars. Yeah, the first half, it looked like the Jaguars were going to walk away with it. And it wasn't, it didn't look like it was a competitive game

at all. Do you think I have a question non game related, um, Mike McDaniel, it's a little too much now with the look, the gold glasses was a little too much. The gold, we knew he was going to do something extra swaggy this year. He has to like level up himself every off season. And this year it was the glasses and that he's got like a fro going like a little mini wavy fro. Yeah. I, I have no problem with the hair. The glasses was just, just wear regular glasses. I don't, I don't know. He looks like a Halloween costume. The glasses he's wearing. I had two, I know we talk college football on Wednesdays, which we will, but I had to like what's going on here. One was Mike McDaniel. The other is the Dylan Raiola thing is creepy. Like I'm actually creeped out by it. How he's trying to steal

Patrick Holmes life. It's weird. Yeah. Did you, did you watch it at all? It's weird. I don't think it's that weird. You don't? Not really. I think it's the mannerisms. The jumping up and down before the game is like, it's, it's. No, he was doing, he was, the way he was warming up was basically a copycat for Patrick Holmes and the hair is exactly the same. It's weird. Well, my homes calls him little Cusso. I guess it's not weird if he's calling him little Cusso. If you want to be the best quarterback in the world, like why not, you know, just be yourself and emulate the best quarterback in the world, why not emulate the best quarterback in the world?

I'm not saying he's a good quarterback. Nebraska's back. That's certifiably true. I was a little creeped out because it feels like he's trying to steal his identity. That was all. Max, do you agree? I agree 100%. I think it's very sure.

I don't understand every single thing. It's crazy! It's the same number, the same arm sleeve, the same hair. The facial hair is the same? It's weird. It's weird. It's super weird. I'm sorry but I'm a little weirded out by it. You wouldn't be weirded out if someone did that exact same thing to Tom Brady? No. Really? Well you didn't watch, did you watch college football? Yeah. Did you watch the Wisconsin game? I didn't watch Wisconsin game. Man. Well what would somebody- I wanted some thoughts on it. The difference is that Mahomes is much much more animated than Tom Brady. So it's easier to copy

him. Tom Brady would just be like not really saying a lot except for let's fucking go. But if he had- and then winning football if you did the same Botox had the same hair Yeah, I don't know. I just maybe I'm on an island. I'm a little weirded out by it. That's all again He's a great water a lot of people are I saw the clip I just saw the clip where he was It was like both of them jumping up and down or whatever like stretching like that just looked like a normal pregame like stretch That like every quarterback. I saw the one where he was doing he was

Getting the ball snapped to him and he was like pretending to throw it with his left hand that looked exactly like Mahal well also the whole like the the haircut and the sunglasses and Facial facial hair it looks he's intentionally trying to look like Mahomes I think he's doing that so when he sees himself in the mirror he's like a little kid that is like watching their favorite team on TV. And it's like, yeah, I'm Tom Brady. Like you get the jersey. You put it on and you're like, I can be like that guy. He's doing that for his entire life. Yeah. But also, wouldn't you be mad if you're Matthew Stafford? That's your godson. Yeah. And he's doing it. He's he's doing my homes. Yeah, I'd be like, come on, man Why don't you just get some veneers and oh, no, maybe just grow the beard out a little bit But not the mustache. Don't you want to look like your your godfather? Right, right by the way, the Lions are driving and

Jared just missed Jimi he slips. He slipped. Oh, Jameer Gibbs slipped Jared just missed Jiminy's he slips. Oh Jameer Gibbs slipped They've driven right down the field. Oh, he slipped that was a walk-in Should we just let's let's pause for this play and see how it goes third and two 106 left in the game It's 20 to 17 Rams Lions are going left to right on the screen Rams Lions are going left to right on the screen You know how they say that on the left right across your video. Yeah radio

That's what they say when they when you listen to a game on radio They always give those contexts because people are listening to this Hank. They're not watching it Alright I'll do I'll do a quick ad and then we can get to the rest again Do you have anything else for dolphins Jaguars besides Jaguars of the Jaguars? Uh, I I feel for Tyree kill I really do he said that when he was getting detained not arrested that he told the police officers one day I want to be a police officer. Oh, he's gonna do the shack thing He's like I respect you. So please don't arrest me because I want to be one of you one day interesting Tyree kill be a hilarious police officer

Yeah, yeah, maybe that's the solution just give him some lights drive as fast as you want He's got some surprise got some teal and orange lights going on I'm super maybe not in Miami cuz Miami's got a lot going on, but I'm surprised in Green Bay or Cleveland They don't just give all the players lights. Yeah. On game day. So Pittsburgh. Yeah. Pittsburgh. Just like, Hey, Buffalo, just, Hey, you got to get to the game. Hit the lights and get to the game. There's no bigger emergency in Pittsburgh than playing on the Steelers and having to get to the game on time. Yeah. TJ watt needs to get on needs to get to that game. Yeah. All right. Uh, the official review. I'll do

an ad, uh, game time football season is here and we can't wait to get to that game. Yeah. All right. The official review, I'll do an ad. Game Time football season is here and we can't wait to get out to some games this fall with the help of Game Time. The official ticketing partner of Barstool Sports. You know how much we love Game Time. Now with their brand new Game Time picks feature, they're making it even easier to get to a game. Game Time picks filters out the fluff to show you only incredible deals on great seats so you don't have to waste time searching through thousands of tickets. I'm actually going to Wisconsin Alabama on Saturday. I'm really looking forward to losing by 30 but I use Game Time and I use the Game Time picks deal for great seats so

just pull up your chosen event and turn on the GT picks setting at the top of the screen. I browse the best local Game Time picks deal near you on your Game Time app homepage. What are you waiting for? I'm going to that game on Saturday and I'm doing it with game time. So download the game time app today and use code PMT to easily score great deals with new game time picks. What time is it? Game time.

We're also brought to you by our friends at Supercuts. Supercuts knows what you think. It's quick, cheap, haircut. You can get almost anywhere. Well, you're right about quick, but Supercuts is not that cheap, not a bargain basement, chop shop like some discount options out there. Supercuts just happens to have 2,000 reputable salons full of trained, proficient stylists who give great haircuts at reasonable prices. I'm actually going to go next week. I'm going to get my haircut. Memes is going to take me. Memes is treating me to a haircut at Supercuts next week.

Wow. In fact, if I were to ask you to imagine a brand that was visited by nearly 25 million people last year with a satisfaction rating of 98%, what brand would come to mind? Would Supercuts? Probably not, but it should. Supercuts is super convenient. Salons let you check in at a time that works for you at supercuts.com or just walk right in. It's your hair. It's your call. Find a salon near you at supercuts.com. Supercuts, real smart hair. Okay, we're back. Third down, 25 seconds left. So they're going to try to stay at two timeouts. So they're going to

try to get a first down here, kick a field goal and then we get free football we got free football a little free Sunday Night Football just keep it going keep this game going until until Monday night Henry yes the New England Patriots are 1-0 congratulations Hank thank you wait what I tell you Jacobi Brissette yeah he by the way so Patriots 16, Bengals 10, Pete Prisco, next time he comes on, we're going to have to have a word with him because Jacobi Brissette has the Patriots to want to know. He said after the

game, I think I cried three times before the game. He cried on the way in and Gerard Mayo was like, why are you crying, man? You're about to win us this game. Jacobi Brissette, big crier. Big crier, I like it though. Doesn't matter, won that game. You can know, you're allowed to cry before a football game. Oh, before? Yeah, or during the national anthem.

Yeah, this was, not if you haven't won a Super Bowl. You can cry, not if you're a coach, like, no Sean Moreno. Yes. He's allowed to cry. If you're a coach of either team, that's too much emotion. Yes, yes you got to be a leader of men. You can't be crying if you're a coach Before a Super Bowl no cuz then everyone would be like hey remember when you cried and then lost the Super Bowl Yeah, and then that gif is just gonna be used any time you screw up Yeah, and that guy wearing the crazy pants was in the

500 level that's probably why he was crying and hurts his dick He probably smelled max and that's why he cried. Yeah. Hank. Yes. That was, I, I, the Patriots are going to just do this to teams. They're going to get in rock fights. This was the definition of a rock fight. It was a good defense, some special teams, some fumbles, run the ball, rock fight, win it 16 to 10. Are you feeling good? 1-0 club. Yeah, 1-0 club. It's always good to win.

You didn't have high expectations for the year, but you go into a Sunday when you're expecting to get blown out and you win, it's fun. Yeah, you guys kept it ugly. And the Bengals did not look sharp at all. This is what they do. Well, what happened was T Higgins, we thought maybe Jamar wouldn't play. Then Jamar's like, yeah, I'll play. And then T. Higgins isn't playing.

But he got food poisoning. But they never, they probably just had Skyline. They start slow every year. They're one in five now in the Joe Borough era, weak ones. Their one win was the overtime win they had against the Steelers. Remember? Yep. Uh, so they don't cover the spread. They don't win week one games. This is what they do. They start slow and they, it's, it's probably because you're number one and number two receiver were in and out of practice and in and out of training camp. Joe Burrows coming back from an injury. Christian Gonzalez also played. Yeah, no. And

the Patriots are, I think the Patriots are, are in that category of teams this year that you can't put them in. I know everyone thought they were going to be really, really bad. They're not going to be the Panthers of the world. They are going to win games by just like rock fights. And based off of what, you know, what they said after the game, like Mayo's speech was really, really good. It seems like the players are getting up to play yeah for him which is a good sign so are you excited you think you think in yofs I'm not thinking yofs but I'm a lot I'm infinitely more excited than I was on Saturday yeah infinitely infinitely because you weren't that excited on

Saturday no I'm thinking eight eight wins Jacobi might get us eight yeah I mean I took the was there their season season total? Five and a half? I think four. I think it was five. Maybe I took over on five and a half alternate, but yeah, Jacobi is a fine, he's a fine quarterback. Who do you got next week? Seahawks. Listen, Seahawks offensive line was not looking good. Guess the line. Defense might eat. Oh. Where is it? It's in New England. I'm gonna say See, huh, I think Seahawks are favored. I think Seahawks minus two and a half. I'm gonna say three What is it? That's what it is. What I don't know which one of these three

I mean, it's close enough all you give us yes to both. What is which one is two point seven? We're guessing the line on DraftKings Go ahead guess the line What's the line? I saw three whose line is ahead, guess the line. What's the line? I saw three. Whose line is it anyways, actually the name of the segment? Oh, Stafford almost threw a pick that would have three. Three, okay.

Yeah, I mean, pitchers are a live dog as long as they make them a dog. Also, they're just gonna shorten games. And I know that there was Fumbleluck, by the way, Hank, I know you don't believe in Fumbleluck. I have a stat for you though. Yes. You ready for it?

Mm-hmm. Here's the stat, fumble luck stat of the day. Do the sound, the fumble luck stat of the day. Boy, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, there it is. The Cincinnati Bengals last season lost two fumbles. The Cincinnati Bengals on Sunday lost two fumbles. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. That was the fumble luck stat of the day. That's a good. That's a good stat. It's crazy, right? Because that's really what it comes down to is like, do you recover your own fumbles? They led the league last year. They'd only lost two fumbles the entire season on Sunday.

They lost two, especially one going into the end zone. That's the difference in the game. Fumble looks not always luck though. Because covering fumbles. Yeah. But if like your offensive lineman are hustling down the field like that crazy play in the Bears game, that like bounced off the defender's helmet and then it was caught by Rome and then Fumbled the ball. Yeah. Offensive line was down there to block. Yeah. You can make your own fumble luck sometimes but there is there's an art to picking up a fumble and Yeah, there's I don't know the luck happens, but the Patriots listen they they're salty team Then when I do my power power rankings, I'm gonna just be like Kings of the Rock fight

I feel like Ramon Dre might be in Belkow territory too. Yeah, right really 120 yards 25 carries. I Love that stat line 25 carries 120 yards long of 17. That's just a good old-fashioned Belkow now We love Joe burrow. He's a friend of the program And he doesn't have to listen to us. He doesn't have to take any of our advice whatever They play the Chiefs next week. If they start 0 and 2, have to have to go back to the natural hair color. Cut the hair. Well, the roots are growing out a little bit. I know, but you got to just die it. That's what I'm saying. I think you can cut it short. Yeah, you have to. You just can't have that as an, you can't be an 0 and 2 quarterback with the bleach blonde tips.

You can't, yeah, you can't do really anything that makes you stand out if you're not good. Yeah. That's the trick. If you're bad, just try to fly under the radar. Yeah. The good news is the Bengals have been here before because they do this every year. Yeah. Although the one year that they did win their week one game, they went to the Super Bowl.

Well, the crazy thing is this is probably the healthiest that Joe Burrow has been in three years to start the season. Yeah. I don't think it's panic for the Bengals, although, uh, you'd probably prefer to not start like this every year. Well, also we should say at the start of the game, there were pretty much two touchdowns that the Bengals had taken off the board. Yeah. There was a Mike Gusecki catch that got taken off. And then I think they had a fumble deep in the red zone too.

Well, that was the, that happened after they, that wasn't, yeah, that they had a fumble deep in the red zone, too Well, that was the that happened after they thought that wasn't yet. That was just a fumble at the goal line Yeah, yeah, I was just bad. So he was kind of holding it weird. It was bad I mean fumbles and fumbles and drop passes are bad, but it could have been it could have gone the other way. Yeah Also, they Dan Hurley was the ruler of the jungle and that didn't work out Do you think was negated by Joey? I was thinking about it more after I know this is hindsight, but Joey Chestnut basically went into Cincinnati and outflayed their citizens. That might have killed the vibes for the Bengals. You beat what, five of them? Five of them.

Yeah, five versus one? Yeah. Yeah, well, of course, Joey Chestnut could go 10 versus one. But that's, that, like, if you're someone from Cincinnati and you watch that happen. That's a that's a brutal feeling. Yeah. Yeah, it's not good It's not good. How did they determine who got to compete with them? I think they just drew 50-50 half. Oh, yeah Yeah, I drew out of hat. All right, we're going to the coin flip in Overtime remember when they screwed up the coin flip with the Steelers and Lions way back in the day. Yep That was crazy Jerome Bettis. They said heads and tails. I think did you know he played for the Rams? What wait?

Was he was Jerome Bettis from Detroit and he played for the Rams shut up He never played a Super Bowl in Detroit. Did he? Next thing you know you're gonna tell me that Jalen Hurts can squat 500 pounds We get it he can okay, he's really good at squatting no I that. I love the fact that they bring it up four times a game now. I think that he had that one play where he just ran over and they were like, yeah, he can squat three of these defensive backs. Yeah, yep. Yeah, it was cool. It was cool. So Hank, not thinking the offs, but happier and more excited about the future What's win some division games win some division games? Are you a male boy? Yeah. Yeah male boys up Do you want Drake may to play soon? No What at what point though if you're I guess you I guess you have to there's that weird balance of like if Jacoby Berset wins Enough games you don't want to make the switch I guess you have to, there's that weird balance of like if Jacoby Berset wins enough games,

you don't want to make the switch, but then also you wouldn't mind having Drake May come in and get his feet wet with a team that isn't as bad as you thought it would be. But if we're thinking Yofs, you can't make a switch. It's been really strange this preseason, hearing how people are talking about Drake May. They're saying almost universally, Drake May is going to be a good quarterback. He just needs to sit for a year. How could you be that certain that he's going to be good if you're also certain that he needs to be sitting right now? It makes no sense. You also, I don't think we talked about Belichick's comments about

yeah, no Belichick hates Caleb Williams. He's made it very clear. What are you going to do? And he wants to coach again. Belichick also is like, listen, best coach of all time. Also put his entire reputation with Mac Jones to end his career. So does he know quarterbacks? I don't know what he said about Caleb. He said like, Oh, he completed half his passes. He's not good. Also, if Bill Belichick is such a great quarterback evaluator, wouldn't he have taken Tom Brady in the fifth round fair question or the fourth round fair question, maybe the fifth round? Fair question. Or the fourth round? Fair question. Maybe the third round? Fair question.

Maybe the second round? Yeah, I just basically, any time someone, including the best coach of all time, comes to kill Williams, I have to think of some way to spin it. So I just kept on saying, yeah, well, he dropped to Mac Jones, so. And he signed the ghost of Cam Newton. Just ignore everything else.

Yeah. Yeah. What did you think, Hank? You like that? You want the pain for us? I want the players of camp Newton. It just ignore everything else. Yeah Yeah, what did you think Hank you you like that you want you want? I want bears to be good No, I want the Bears to be good. I've said it a million times I want the city to be buzzing with with Bears fever it is you don't mean that he doesn't I do you say it? But you don't doesn't mean it. I absolutely do what about I understanders. He doesn't give it. I absolutely do. What about the commanders? He doesn't give a shit. I don't really care about that. What about the Eagles? Eagles I want to lose in as painful a fashion as humanly possible.

This is what's so painful for me is that I long- I have no beef with Chicago. I long for teams to care about my team one way or the other. And I don't blame them for being like, I don't give a shit about the commanders. Yeah. We've been irrelevant. Right.

I just want, I want, we were in Philly the other week, and somebody asked me, do you think they're going to get a fuck the commanders chant going? I was like, no. No, they don't, they don't give a shit about it. Like, I, I yearn to be good enough to have the city of Philadelphia hate me. Right.

That's my goal. Right. It is a weird thing that like in Philly, like everyone hates the Giants, everyone hates the Cowboys. No, absolutely. Yeah, and that's the, I don't think about you at all. Yeah, and that hurts. And it stings, that's more than anything,

I just wanna get to the point where I can have enemies again. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's fun to have enemies. point where I can have enemies again. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's fun to have enemies It is you have enemies you the enemies aren't don't reciprocate I mean I have it similar Packers fans hate Bears fans, but and they hate the Bears, but they also just big brother us Yeah, you're like you know, that's nice. You know, you got another quarterback Speaking of which we can go to the next we want to be the Lions the Lions, like the Lions were like that, but now they're getting

a little bit, they have a little bit of juice. Yeah, I'm getting close to hating the Lions. I want them to win tonight, but I'm getting close to hating them. I want to be good enough to have people despise me. Yeah. Yeah. Speaking of a good segue, the Steelers 18, Falcons 10. I didn't bring this up when we were talking about Bears Titans, but Justin Fields started this game and Justin Fields and Cale Williams had a combined 20 drives today and zero touchdowns.

Yeah, it was just like, it just all stalled out once they got anywhere close. They were just living with field goals today. And Tomlin, Mike Tomlin without a hat on is one of the more shocking things that I've seen in a long time. It was crazy. And it's wild because Tomlin's been coaching in the league for forever. Yeah. And I feel like we've never seen him with a hat without a hat until today. Yeah. And it was it took my breath away. I was like,

who is that? You did. You stopped you to start. We also had and it was clarified that Russell Wilson was the emergency quarterback, but there was a tweet that went super viral that just this is when you know, you're kind of down bad because everyone just makes a narrative the emergency quarterback, but there was a tweet that went super viral that just, this is when you know you're kind of down bad because everyone just makes a narrative on you. Uh, they're like, Russell Wilson's inactive today and he's dressed in full pad. Yeah. I was the emergency quarterback. I thought the same thing. I thought he was inactive and I, but I was, it would be Russell Wilson to do that. Yeah. In fact, I saw Russell on the sideline and I was like, Oh, I know

he's inactive, but that's not weird for Russell Wilson at all to be wearing. Correct. Yeah. Correct. So yeah, that was, he was, he was technically emergency quarterback. So that's why he was in pads. By the way, David Montgomery is just a monster. I think this was the perfect game for Russell Wilson because they, Justin played good enough

to get a win. Yeah. And he did not play good enough to take the starting job from Russell Wilson who hasn't even had a start yet, but still he's penciled in there as a starter, but there's not going to be any talk this week about like, maybe we should just stick with Justin. Yeah. There was nothing that I saw from Justin Fields that said, Oh, everything's changed. The only thing that changed for him is he had a defense that could back them up. Yeah. If you were to draw it up, if you were Drew Bledsoe and you saw Tom Brady's first

like 16 starts, you want them all to look like this. Yeah, he was he did just enough to get you like you said, get them into field goal range. They had six field goals. Our guy stat hole which check out he has a great blog every week recapping all the stats. Chris Boswell was one yard shy of the all time record for most yards in field goals in a game. So he had 273 yards of field goals. Jason Myers had 274 a few years ago, but Boswell added a 43-yard punt. So I think he should get the record. All-time kicking record. Yeah. Most yards, although there's probably someone who had punt.

Yeah. I was punter. Yeah. But this was just a field goal game. We also had in this game. Uh, TJ watt is so good that he confuses the refs Yeah, so he's he's not technically off sides, but it looks like he's offside He timed it so he timed a snap so well and then strip. I think they did twice strip sacked Uh kirk cousins, but they called him off sides and He he's so good at how he times it the ref apologized to him afterwards and said he fucked it up Yeah, which is nuts. He was getting some crazy jumps He was always in the backfield who's everywhere and every time there's a ball on the ground TJ

Watt is the first person on the field easy. He sees the ball on the ground before the guy who fumbles. Yeah, it's crazy He's just always crawling towards a football. Yeah, he played really well today Kirk cousins Did not play that. Rusty. Great. Yeah. He looked like he's still recovering from something. Now, Kirk's never been the most mobile guy in the world. Yeah, but-

But I've seen him move around a little bit better. And that was a weird Kirk Cousins game because he had a, I think he had two interceptions. And usually Kirk Cousins' interceptions are not like horrendous. He's just careless with the ball. He was careless with those. He was just kind of throwing it up there as he was getting sacked. Being like, I don't know where this is going. Nobody is better, except Will Leves had a couple of these today. But Kirk Cousins is very good at throwing intentionally incomplete passes.

Yes. Kirk is the man throwing it at their feet. Yeah. At their feet. He'll bounce like exactly one foot in front of them to the point where their receiver won't even make a play on it. But he's not trying to complete the pass at all. And it doesn't look like it's intentional. Yeah, but he's very good at trying to miss passes. But Kirk Cousins did not look good today. The Steelers look like they are the exact same Steelers every single year where they're going to be hard to watch offensively, but their defense is so good. They're going to win these games where they're an underdog. Yeah.

One of the most funny plays of the game was George Pickens, who does six insane things every game. Oh my God. Three of which are insane in terms of like body control. And then the other three are insane in terms of like clinically mentally insane. Yes. At the end of the first half, he caught a ball on the sidelines. I think at the time that he caught it, there were like four seconds left. Yeah. And then he comes down, tries to cut back and stay in bounds to gain another

like five meaningless yards at that point. But the clock would have run out, but his toe was on the line. Yes. So they ended up having one second left. Yeah. Half. Yes. And so unintentionally he did the right thing, which is that's a big upgrade for George. Like you don't have to, you don't have to necessarily try to do the right thing as long as you end up doing the right thing. Right. Right. Right. Sometimes bad intentions can lead to good results. Yeah, that's what happened. He is so crazy. He's nuts. Also shout out to Falcons. They used Bichon and Kyle Pitts. Hank, this is actually going to be a very painful. The Lions are about to score. David Montgomery is going to score the touchdown. I let everyone down.

I'm out of the pick for next week. We're going to make it a pick three. Think of how electric this moment would be right now. It would have been the most electric moment in PMT history to have David Montgomery hit that parlay for the people. I apologize to everyone. Dalton Kincaid had a moment would have been so sick.

We would have been going nuts in overtime. He just took over Dalton King Kate better than night Dalton King Kate had a play drawn up for him on the 10 yard line that got tipped at the at the line of scrimmage He would have walked in I can't believe that good pick Hank Cal pits great pick for the three of you I'm out. So next week So how we're gonna do it is if someone misses they're out and we'll make it three Three to score so we have a better chance of actually hitting it because if I was out what's gonna happen when? It's not one person that doesn't we'll just look for a coin. Yeah. Yeah, whoever had the better whoever was closer I apologize, but my parlay hit big cat parlay. So at least you maybe people rate rode that

That one didn't lose wink but it didn't lose but the Lions won 26 20 that was an awesome game that was a great game that was an awesome game football rocks uh what were we talking about Oh Steelers Falcon yes Steelers Falcons oh another thing with George Pickens I actually think that Mike Tomlin likes having those kind of guys on his team. Yeah at some point you have to say like We've always said Mike Tomlin has done a great job of managing crazy personalities in the past But also lost in that is the fact that Mike Tomlin always has crazy personalities on his team I think he really enjoys having one guy who's a challenge

Yes And then he shows the rest of the team like I will I will reach this one guy and then everyone sees him doing that And that's how they all follow Mike. Yes. Yes, and he is up to the task for it but yeah, the I I walked away from this game being like the Falcons are gonna still be the I mean if Kirk Cousins is Is gonna be this rusty. I don't think they're gonna bench him but it definitely derails what they expected out of this season if he's going to take a while to get going. They were playing the Steelers who have a very good defense. And if you had to pick one team to go up against as a 35-year-old guy who's coming back from Achilles, probably not TJ Watt.

Yeah, not a good idea to do that. That whole defense is very good. So we'll see what happens when they play some different defenses. But the Steelers are the exact same Steelers. And I expect them to be the exact same Steelers. And they're going to be low scoring games. They're going to win when you think that they're not going to win. They're going to probably lose a couple games that they should win.

And they're going to finish 9-8. I do think that the offense looked better, though. Yeah, it did. Compared to last year. Yeah, Najee ran hard and George Pickens is awesome. If you can figure out a way to get the ball to George Pickens, he's insane. Yeah, if you can... His hands are insane, his body control is insane, he's so fast. Limit him to just one unsportsmanlike conduct penalty per game. Yeah. And I think you usually win those games. Yeah. Um, I was a little confused. They didn't really run Jalen Warren at all. Yeah. Not because nausea look good. Yeah. But it was, I do feel like Jalen Warren gives him another element

that just, I don't know. Well, he was a lot better than nausea last year. Yeah. Uh, okay. Okay, next up we have Vikings 28 Giants 6 Here is where Giants fans are at This is from at Jones to China Twitter account he said in a serious country Daniel Jones would be beaten with hammers Is that China he He's probably right. Yeah, it's China. Yeah, probably.

Probably. He wasn't great today, Big Cat. I don't think so. The pick six that he threw in the first half, the fans booing the entire organization at halftime. They were wearing the ridiculous throwback jerseys, which you don't wear on week one. The pants, I don't mind the jersey itself, the pants and the helmet are gross. Yeah, they were Michigan's helmets.

It's a gross setup and you don't do that week one. All fans want on week one, take the family to a game, see the colors that you haven't seen in nine months. Go out there and watch what you know to be your favorite football team in your favorite colors play a football game. Correct. And then you show up to the stadium and they're wearing the ones that look like something. It looks like a piece of turd that Superman shit out. It's a bad uniform combo. You can sprinkle it in occasionally, maybe wear them in the preseason, maybe wear them

once you're out of playoff contention, then you can sprinkle those in. But not week one. That's a random Thursday night throwback night in the middle of November. Especially if it's a bad team playing on that Thursday. At least we have new uniforms for that. Maybe they're a different team. I also just don't like when teams do the throwbacks just to do the throwbacks when their regular jerseys are classics. It's when the Steelers did the Bumblebees. Yeah. What are you doing? The Steelers have incredible jerseys are classics. It's when the Steelers did the Bumblebees. Yeah.

What are you doing? The Steelers have incredible jerseys. Why would you do the throwback for that? Well, then you wanna also sell more jerseys. Correct, but I just hate it. I don't know. There's some classic jerseys that you just don't need to do throwbacks on.

And week one, and we're talking too much about jersey. It's Daniel Jones. It's over. It's Daniel Jones. It's over. It's been over. He's going to cost Brian Dable his job, who I still think is not a bad coach, but I think it's going to cost him his job. You had fans yelling at Daniel Jones going into the game, or was that after the game? I think it was after.

I think it was after. That's even worse. Yeah, I don't think it was going in. Going in would have been mean. Going in would have been mean, but going out is worse in a weird way because you just had I mean that interception through to van ginkle What is he doing? Yeah, I was it was pretty bad and there were also a lot of bad clips at that front off Why did they agree to do hard knocks? It makes no sense that team especially was probably mr Mara's call it was probably mr. Mara trying to generate more revenue for the league as a whole

He's a team player But the clips that were going around after the Saquon Barkley night were bad made even worse By what happened with Daniel Jones? Yes, and and their owner talked about Saquon being like the most popular player by far Like I'm gonna lose sleep if he goes to the Eagles. I Have no idea why they allowed to make that to television. Yeah. Why didn't, why did you not keep that out? It makes no sense.

It makes no sense. Um, but yeah, it's over for Dan Jones and I am on the flip side. I am throwing my vote behind Sam Donald for guy who's going to be better than everyone expected this year. I said it was a loser leaves town game for me personally whoever played better in this game I was gonna throw all my weight behind. Hey, he's not as bad as everyone thinks he is So so Daniel Jones actually he isn't as bad as everyone thinks he is. He's worse But Sam Donald's not as bad as everyone thinks he is. He's better

Yeah, Sam Donald late bloomer seven-year bump late bloomer for him. He looked not bad in this offense Yeah, he was Kevin O'Connell's good. He knows how to make quarterbacks play good. And two of those reasons are Justin Jefferson, Jordan Addison. Addison got hurt though today. So I don't know if he's again. Yeah, I think he got hurt. Right? I don't know. He went I think he may have left the game hurt. Okay, so that's not good for the Vikings. But I do think that Sam Darnold played well. Yeah. By the way, NFC North tough division three out of the four teams are one to know. That's fucking tough. Tough big boy football big boy football. Big boy football which team isn't the Green Bay Packers. But Jordan was

okay. FC is three now. Oh memes big boy memes. We're gonna get to you memes but you got a big one. I'm gonna do that real quick. That tweet NFC North has is is NFC North the best division in football is the Aaron Jones is good and I don't know I'm happy but I don't know why the Packers got rid of them for Josh Jacobs. I don't either. I don't like the fact that when you saw him score his first touchdown people were like wait That's not that's not James Cook Wait, that's not Alexander Madison. Yeah, wait, that's Aaron Jones. Yeah Actually, they have a type we when when you do the three-way triangle trade,

I think the Packers lost all of it because Alexander Madison is on the Raiders, right? Yeah. And he looked not bad. Yep. Scored a touchdown, right? Yep. And Aaron Jones looked good.

That's the, that's the domino that will be talked about for decades to come in the NFL. Yeah. But yeah, the Giants are just, this is, it's, didn't just stop with, and they're just, I guess if you're a Giants fan, at least you know, it's so apparent, like you can now just watch college football on Saturday and be like, who's our next quarterback? Mm-hmm.

Right? And if you're a Vikings fan, you're like, this year might be okay. Yeah. You might be decent. Sam Darnold might not be bad, seven-year bump. I would put him as the top backup in the NFL right now. Cause he started, he's a starter.

Oh yeah, technically. Yeah. Cause he, I think he outperformed Justin Fields, who is the other backup that's a starter. That's right. So I would put him as one. Gardner is still, he's a backup. He is a backup in nature.

Gardner is a backup by vibe. Yeah. Yeah. Very much so. All right, Last game of the early window. Saints 47 Panthers 10. If you want to feel really, really dumb, as a human being, bet on Bryce Young. It's a really good way to humble yourself. I did it. And it was one single pass into the game that I remembered, oh yeah, this guy stinks

and the Panthers are bad. Yeah, I want very much for Bryce to show glimpses, show flashes, just because I feel terrible for Panthers fans. Because your franchise is in the biggest, deepest, darkest hole. And it's gonna continue to get deeper because of the pick situation that you guys have.

Correct. And you've got the owner that you don't really like. You got just all bad things going on around your organization. So I want Bryce to look like he might give you some hope and you didn't really get that at all today. He threw a pick on his first throw and then later on in the first quarter he got basically tackled by his own lineman. Did you guys see that highlight? That was bad

His in what I mean tackled like the lineman is just was just standing there being a 300 pound lineman and Bryce Young happened to Graze up next to him and fell over. Yeah, I've I'm at the point now where I feel bad for Bryce Young So I actually looked it up. He's made 25 million dollars. That's good. Yeah, that's I I did that almost as like I feel so bad I gotta think of something he made 25 million dollars. Yeah good for him I still feel bad for for the fans though. You should be we talk about this. I think Pretty much every year for the worst team whether or not you're allowed to just change your allegiance as a fan I think under certain circumstances you should be allowed to. Yes. I think you should have to pay some sort of penalty. Like if you go to prison for a year, I think you could go to prison and then you

could come out and you could say, I'm now a fan of this completely different city, but you have to take on all that city's teams. Yeah. And Bryce Young, like the Panthers, that is prison. Do you think that that's a, that's a year of prison you're going through. Do you think that anybody has moved out or is going to move out of Charlotte primarily for the reason that they don't like the Carolina Panthers anymore? Can't stand David Tepper. I think that might have, I think you might see a handful of people start to do that right now. Yeah. I would consider leaving Charlotte. Yeah. You should leave. Just move to Raleigh. Just go to, go to, go to San Diego and be a Harbaugh guy. Yeah, that's a great point Yeah, just be a Harbaugh guy. But yeah the um, you really really feel dumb when you bet on the Panthers

I don't know why I thought maybe we even said it on Friday They went an entire season without Lee taking a snap leading in the fourth quarter and then my dumb shit for brains Self was like yeah, you know what? Panthers. Yeah, you tried to outsmart yourself. I mean, that's my whole theory was you can't be as bad as you were last year.

No, you can. You ironically outsmarted yourself by trying to outsmart yourself. Correct. Saints look good, though. Well, Clint Kubiak was on the sidelines. So mystery solved. Dialing it up. Yeah. Loose lip sink ships and

Dennis Allen knows that you can't be telling tales out of school to the media. Listen, I was not familiar with Dennis Allen's game. It worked. Yeah. Clint Kubiak called a great game. Yeah. From the sidelines. From the sidelines. Not from the booth. Yeah. And the Panthers didn't know what to do with that. They were they were looking for him in the wrong places. Derek Carr was good. Derek Carr was good. They they him like a steady diet of Tay-some-hill right off the start. Yeah, Kamara, Tay-some-hill, just run downhill.

Rashid Shahid looks super fast. Love saying his name. I don't like his number though. What is his number? I think it's 22. Okay. It's in the 20s. A guy like that either should be 11 or maybe like 81 82 to remind you that he plays wide receiver Do I'm trying to think about it? Yeah, I could even use it I could

88 I could even do I think he's too small for an idiot might be too smart again I have no idea what size he actually is because the number 22 I assume if you're wearing 22 that your you're a prototypical like tailback size. Yeah. That you're 5'11", 227. What's the fattest number? Because I was thinking about it. I think it's the fat guy on the Ravens was wearing 58.

Those numbers compressed on a jersey, like when it scrunches up on a fat belly, those look very fat. Well, it matters. 78. 78. It matters what position. Seven is kind of a skinny number. Like five and those look very fat. Well it matters 78. 78 it matters what position. Seven is kind of a skinny number like five and eight are both fat. Like there was a kicker that was wearing 44 the other day. Yeah. And that to me I was like that kicker's fat but no he was in

good shape just 44 that's a fullback number. Yeah. Uh 90 is usually a pretty fat guy. That's yeah you need you need you need an eight or a zero because like circles, when they get scrunched up, just look. They go wide and it's just, they kind of fold into each other. 99 is not fat. 98, I think, more times than often. No, 99 is one of the fastest. Yeah, he's fast and he's strong. 98.

I think 98 is a strong number. Okay. 96 is a fat guy. 96 is a fat guy. Big time fat guy. 95 also a fat guy. 92. Yep. That's a fat guy. Yeah What were we talking about Rashid Shahid? Oh awesome name awesome name actually just about bumped out Malik Willis for Coolest name. Yeah, but no Malik is the guy that has the such a better sounding name than he is a football player, correct?

Yeah, that's true. He is the answer to that Sounding name than he is a football player correct. Yeah, that's true. He is the answer to that Yeah, the Saints I don't know I house I'm so mad at myself too because I said to myself all offseason like Saints might not be as bad as we think and Then I'm like yeah, you know what let me take the Panthers Derek Carr won me over He was a cool guy. Yeah, he's a very cool guy to talk to he was he was a lot cooler than I was expecting And he was in on the joke so yeah, we're I think we're DC guys I like Derek. I like saying DC Yeah

Now we don't know if the Panther or if the the Saints are good or if they just had the acute case of playing against the Panthers Yeah, let's play a game called When will the Panthers get their first win? Okay. All right. Here we go Week two chargers. Nope, no chance. That's Harbaugh's going to chew them up and spit them out. Did you see Bryce Young at one point, he was down on himself and he went to the sidelines and Dave Canales went over to him and gave him the like, got down on a knee like he was his dad. He's like, come on slugger.

Yeah. Like gave him that nice, nice little pep talk and Bryce just wanted no part of it. None. Uh, week three, At the Raiders. Maybe. That's a maybe. That's a maybe. That's a maybe. Week four, At Home at the Raiders. Maybe that's a maybe that's a maybe that's a maybe week four at home against the Bengals. That'll be when the Bengals have figured it all out. Yeah, no, that's not a week five at the Bears. If Kale Williams throws for over a hundred yards,

I'd say no chance. If he goes under a hundred yards, they might have a chance. Now I don't want it to happen, but for the podcast, it would be pretty good. We do have their second round pick week six Falcons at home that could be yeah They beat the Falcons last in the division. Yeah weird stuff happens in the division week seven at commanders No, right Sean might go off. No, I don't think so. Okay, easy schedule. Yeah, they did Well, they were last place team. They were the worst team in the league That's another thing we're gonna have to teach you about yeah I know how they make the schedules because you just never know you just played Never played different you never thought about it. Hey, it's like the schedule is a schedule you're getting that

I know you get mashed up with a division in no conference Yeah, you play the fourth fourth place teams play fourth place teams If you're Hank, you probably thought that the Patriots were just like you it was like college where you set your own schedule Yeah, the Patriots like yeah, we'll beat anybody. Yeah, it doesn't matter That's why you guys always played the best team if you can see a trend They're gonna be playing the fourth place team from last year and every single conference. So yeah, they're playing at the Broncos Saints at the Giants or at home against the Giants. So they have a winning record. Yeah. Yeah, they could win some games Cardinals They could win. Yeah, I see I see a couple potential. Yeah, they're gonna win a couple games. Um, okay

Pft. Why don't you hit us with a couple ads and we'll get to the afternoon games Shout out the Saints. They're back. Part of my take is sponsored by BetterHelp. Kids are always learning and growing, but as adults sometimes we lose that curiosity. What's something that you'd like to learn? Gardening, new language, maybe how to finally beat your best friend in bowling. Therapy can help you reconnect with your sense of wonder because your back to school era can come at any age. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, suited to your schedule.

Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. Rediscover your curiosity with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash PMT today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-helphelp.com slash PMT. Part of my take is also brought to you by our great friends over at Mountain Dew, baby. Mountain Dew, you know what we all need?

We need to get off our ass. With bold flavors and refreshing citrus kick, Mountain Dew will get you off your ass, will have you feeling like you're on an actual mountain. I love the code red Mountain Dew. I love the Baja Blast too. Baja Blast, such a treat. Code red, change the game in sodas.

A mountain where the weather is always perfect, that's what you get with Mountain Dew. Your friends are ready to hang and a day of epic proportions awaits. We were at Camp Barstool a couple weeks ago, slugging some Mountain Dews, chugging them, quenching our thirst with the Dew, doing the Dew left and right. The Mountain is calling. You should answer. Grab your friends. Grab an ice cold Mountain Dew, wherever refreshing beverages are sold and do the Dew. Okay. Afternoon games, PFT. Box 37, Commander's 20. The floor is yours

0-1 our defense stinks. Yeah, and I don't think it's gonna get better. I think we're we're a we're a bad football team Hmm, and I don't think I was ready for how bad the defense was gonna be but I was listen I was so nervous going into this game. I almost couldn't watch I felt like I was Jayden Daniels dad and the sidelines some are saying you might be a helicopter parent Oh, maybe yeah, I'll take that week one. I was nervous. I let the kid fall every now. I know I don't want him to fall I was scared. I was scared to watch my almost like I wanted the game to be played at noon I wanted to get out of the way as soon as possible and then as the games went by it was just dreading I was like what if something bad happens. I was thinking all the worst thoughts

Jayden looked pretty good though. I'm happy with how things went. I do need some help though, because now I've found myself squarely in the crosshairs of being targeted by people saying, nice second overall pick on a running back. I've been there. I'm going into the Lamar situation. So I'm hoping that you have some advice for me for how to deal with those people. Yeah. One thing that I tried to do was just put out the blind resume for all the rookie quarterbacks making their starts today. And Jayden had a good statistical day.

He was not the problem. I would have liked to see that one pass to McClure and that was deep. I want to see that connect. Outside of that, the rest of the team, we're just not a good football team. team. We're not good. We're not really good at anything. Jaden needs to figure out a way to keep his helmet on though. That part is scary to me. Helmet just pops off every two seconds. He doesn't really tie it, buckle it in tight, and it was coming off even in pre-games.

Then every time he would get touched, it would fly off, which resulted in him getting two penalties that were called because it looked like he got decapitated. Yeah. Because his helmet rolls across the field. Also before every play, he puts his mouthpiece in, but he puts it in on the side of his mouth and then he chews on it. And we haven't ever said anything bad about any player that just chews on their mouthpiece all game.

Correct. Right? Yeah. Okay, good. Just want to make sure. I don't think you have to worry about the running stuff because he's clearly a very good passer. Like he is. Yeah. He's good passer. He knows when you, when you watch him throw the ball, it like it's fluid. It makes sense. It's not like adjusting fields. Even Lamar who has won two MVPs, like people calling him Lamar. Great. Two MVPs. Two MVPs. I love that. Awesome.

Oh, you're saying we have a good running back? That's great. It's been a long time since we had a good running back, too. Yeah. You have Thunder and Lightning. Thunder and Lightning all in one together. He leads the league in smiles. That's what I like the most.

The guy, the kid's having fun out there. I thought he looked fine for his first start. I didn't think he looked bad. He didn't look great, but it's his first start. I thought't think he looked bad. He didn't look great, but it's his first start. I thought he looked pretty good overall. When he takes off and runs, nobody's catching him. He's very fast. I like that. Some of the passing was good. Some of the passing wasn't so good. He needs more helmet discipline, and then the rest of the team just stinks. The defense

was... Maybe Baker was just playing really well Oh Baker was incredible, but there were a lot of open guys Baker was incredible. It did feel like every time Baker threw the ball was going somewhere for 15 yards It was going to the right place for 15. You're every single every single every time 15 yards I I think we forced one punt and every other drive ended in points Yeah, he had four touchdowns, Baker. And he he also that pass that touchdown pass to Mike Evans was incredible. Yeah. Where it was more Mike Evans was incredible.

He just big bodied him. I think this might be the last straw for Manuel Forbes, though. Oh, that's good. I think it might be it. I think we're saying, OK, we'll give you one more chance. And he got benched a couple of times today. At some point, you just have to say he can't play. There was a moment where he had a tackle and you were like, oh, Emmanuel Forbes had a tackle.

And it was a play where it was in the middle of the field. It was like, you want your cornerback covering the guy, not tackling him. But that's progress for Emmanuel Forbes. And then I watched the replay and I was like, oh, well he assisted on attack. Right, and he also should have been. And he also should have been covering. He also should have been covering.

Yeah. Everything was bad on the defense. There were glimpses where it looked kind of cool on offense. But overall, I'm OK with it. We're not going to be a good team this year. And you might. I'm not thinking soupy. And you might beat the Giants next week.

That's really the Super Bowl for me. Yeah. If we can go 2 and 0 against the Giants and beat the Panthers Yeah, that's perfect season, baby. Yeah, I think you're I think you're gonna beat the Giants. I think I mean Jaden Daniels is Significantly better than Daniel Jones. Yeah. Yeah, he is. That's not even close Max as a division rival What did you think about Jaden? I? Thought I you I was watching that game with you and I was saying good things about Jane Daniels He's my fantasy quarterback

I was I wanted him to do well and everything you use all the positive things that I was saying you're like You thought that there was some other meaning behind it. Yeah, I thought you were I thought you were two-toned to me I wasn't I thought there was a there was Subcontext to every comment you were making no, I think Jane Daniels is good I think the commander suck, but I think Jane Daniels is good. You have to realize I had my guard up during that game as the protective father that I felt like in the stands watching. Actually, I felt more like the mom where I was just like baring my head in my hands.

I was like, I can't watch. Just tell me what happens. So yes, I was on high alert for that game with the rookie quarterback as I feel like I'm a test to be. CEPFT, yeah. You got to be on high alert. I'm on high alert and so Max was giving compliments. I was like, Max shut the you were like he needs to tighten up his chin strap. I was like you gotta

tighten up that mouth. Dude, listen, you gotta get on high alert when you have a rookie quarterback. If if if you if Max, if you spent one second in my mentions for the entirety of the Bears game, they would ban Twitter. They'd be like, you can't, this is hate speech everywhere. I said out loud, I was like, I think I might just deactivate. Can I keep my account if I deactivate? You got to be on a high alert with a rookie quarterback. Yeah, I am. I'm on very high alert. And you know what? Next week, it's a must win. Yeah.

The Giants, you got to take care of business. That's huge. Because if we don't beat the Giants, that means. The Giants. You got to take care of business. That's huge. Because if we don't beat the Giants, that means that the Giants are better than us. Yeah. And that's not a world I want to live in this season. What was the name of the sideline reporter who was swagged out? That was weird. Laura Oakman. Yeah. What was that? She was rocking a bucket hat and she was wearing a chain and she looked like when they dressed Kirk Cousins up after a game. Like is it because Oasis is back? Is that why she's wearing the bucket hat? Is that for Liam? I don't know. They just English people wear bucket hats. I don't know. She looked

like LL Cool J. Yeah. That was a weird look. It was a strange look. I thought that she was doing it because we didn't have the sound on that game. We're listening to Tom Brady. So we were watching that and we were trying to figure out what was going on. I thought she was doing it because there's like a story that maybe Jaden Daniels has a picture I'm unaware of where he's dressed up like that. She was the Steve Buscemi, hey, what's up kid? What's that mean? How you doing kids? How you doing fellow kids?

How you doing fellow kids? That's what she looked like. Yeah, it was a strange look, but that was the least of my concerns. Yeah. We're just a bad team. And you know what? I'm glad that I came to realization week one. I think you're good enough to beat the Eagles at least once and be a pain in the ass to Max. I would love that I came to realization week one I think you're good enough to beat the Eagles Lee want at least once and be a pain in the ass to max

I would love that yeah, I do I think that's I just what I just want you to hate me. I want you to hate me max Yeah You want you can't hate me? Feel anything you'll never do it, and that's so it's so painful that you'll never hate me no um by the way I have breaking moves. Breaking moves. Breaking moves. Rebecca Romaine has tweeted at us, saying, message to AWLs,

Mr. Jerry OC is muttering, should have picked up Baker instead of Dak. We have no clue what this means, but we are worried this time. It's just a picture of him sitting in a car. Are we worried about Jerry? Jerry's having big time foam on basically any player that does well this week. Yeah. And it doesn't even matter because we're going to win our game. Jerry did, shout out to Jerry O'Connell and his drafting ability because the AI feature on Yahoo graded him as an A. Yeah. Yeah. I think they projected we go like 12 and 4

this season. Yeah. So we did a good job and we're winning week one, but Jerry, he is, he's about that life right now. That's all he's second guessing everything. I did tell her and she's probably gonna listen to this because she's in AWL now, but the only thing that will fix Jerry is four quarters of an uninterrupted Monday night football. Yeah. Just let him that let him watch. Rebecca, if you want to come watch the game with us and just have Jerry chill at home and he gets to tune in all on his own, we'll do that.

We feel like we've known you forever. I'll do Jerry such a big favor by inviting you to Chicago to hang out with us for an evening. Yeah, I'm in. Okay, next up, Cowboys 33, Browns 17. Dak got absolutely paid. A couple hours before the season started.

You got $240 million, 231 guaranteed four-year contract. So much for turning up the heat, Jerry Jones. He did have a great quote though. He said, I hope Dak is our quarterback for the rest of my life. Whoa. Yeah. Four years.

Yeah, well, he's, no, then he said, and that's not just limited to the terms of this contract. Whoa. Yeah. Four years. Yeah. Well, he's no, then he said, and that's not just limited to the terms of this contract. Oh, that's smart. But it sounds like it certainly is. Also genius, genius move by Jerry Jones because you could say, oh my God, you're overpaying for Dak Prescott, but you waited a couple hours before you played a game against the worst quarterback contract of all time in Deshaun Watson. Because that really was like, think about it, Dak signed this four year 240 million

contract and Deshaun's contract was the entire talk online during that game because it is the worst contract ever. It's impossible to beat. Maybe not even the the worst contract ever. It's impossible to beat. I, maybe not even the worst NFL contract ever. Maybe not even the worst sports contract ever. Deshaun Watson might have the worst contract ever. We got to look it up in Louisiana purchase. I feel like we got that for like a couple of minutes. We fleeced. Yeah. We fleeced. We got them. Maybe white star cruise lines. Yeah. To build the Titanic. Yeah. Pretty bad contract. And then it's Deshaun Watson. Deshaun Watson, close second.

It's $230 million guaranteed. I actually think that Deshaun Watson is so bad at football now that he hates football that he's just going to pretend to be injured because what do I care? Yes, you're exactly right. When he's playing, he hates being out on the field. Yeah. Can't stand being out on the field.

He looks like he'd rather be anywhere else. He doesn't want to talk to anybody, doesn't want to talk to his teammates, doesn't want to talk to anybody, doesn't want to talk to his teammates, doesn't want to talk to his coaches. He is looking forward to getting hit hard enough to make it convincing that he's hurt where he can't play. He's going to have an elbow injury coming up. Yeah.

I guarantee it. The other shoulder. Yeah. So I thought of this independent of, I guess someone tweeted this at memes and Max, but Deshaun Watson's so bad at football now, I think you could say that he's a better person than football player? I think he's so bad at football. I would say he's a bad person. I would say as good as he is at quarterback, even better human being. Yeah, that's how bad he is at football now.

He's a better human than football player. Yeah. Because he's so bad at football. That's a great spin zone. Yeah. He's somehow reversed it. It's close. It is close. It's a race to the bottom. It's week to week. Mincey asked if he can even show his face in Cleveland after this. I was like, I think that's the only part of his body he is allowed to share. Correct. He's I mean, it's, it's, it's nuts how bad he is. And he's just, it's, it's abysmal to watch. He was, he looks like a backup that should never be playing a game, playing a game. He was throwing the ball six yards out of bounds on almost every throw. Every time I watched him hurl a pass downfield and we had Tom Brady in the booth commentating

on it. What do you think, Tom? How do you think if you were to give him like a letter grade, Tom Brady in the booth commentating on it. What do you think Tom Brady, how do you think if you were to give him like a letter grade Tom Brady did week one? I can't say that I listened enough. I would say that his voice is gonna take some getting used to. It's a little whiny. Yeah, but he'll get comfortable.

Give it a B. Yeah. It's gonna take a, here's what I'll say. It needs a couple reps. Similar, Tom Brady, similar to if you're listening to this, please come on the show. We'd love to have you on the show. We can give you some tips. Similar to Dak Prescott playing against a game against Deshaun Watson and immediately his contract looks like a discount. Tom Brady, you need to just retweet every clip you can find of Nebraska Colorado on Saturday night. Because that was tough for Colt McCoy. Well, it was tough for Colt. It was tough for the refs too. Yeah, it was tough for the

whole operation. The whole operation. It was bad. And I like Colt and I hope he turns around. It wasn't his best. The first game is there's jitters. You know what here's another spin zone for Tom Brady You don't want to be Tony Romo that everyone sucks off in the first game And then everyone's like wait this guy's actually annoying then you've taught Brady wasn't annoying He just has work to do he had a little bit of jitters He also was he was a little bit nervous going into it the first couple times the cameras on them a couple missteps here And there I actually I I feel like it's when I'm watching Tom Brady, and he's on TV announcing a couple missteps here and there. I actually, I feel like it's, when I'm watching Tom Brady and he's on TV announcing a football game, I feel like that's beneath him to do

that. Yeah. I feel like Tom should be just like sitting in some high rise apartment somewhere with like absolutely no fabric anywhere in the room. Just all marble and granite. And he's there watching a glamorous TV with a glass of red wine. Tom Brady doesn't need to be in Cleveland, Ohio. No. Talking to me about Deshaun Watson. He stayed at a hotel in Cleveland. Yeah, see, that's what I'm saying.

Like that kind of ruins. Oh, that's Cleveland, actually. It ruins the image of Tom Brady for me. Yeah, he should be on a beach. He's too good to be telling me about crummy football. Also, Tom Brady come on the show because until you come on the show, we'll just say Greg Olson is better because Greg Olson's a good friend of ours. Yeah, well, he is better. Yeah. But that's because Greg Olson's a good friend of ours. Yeah, well, he is better.

Yeah, but that's because Greg Olson has been doing it for a couple years, and he's a natural. That's true, I don't think he was, Tom Brady is not a natural. He will go work harder than anyone, right, Hank? Yep. The commercial hyping up Tom Brady was weird.

Oh, it was great. It was a little weird. It was strange. I thought it was really well done. There's a little weird for an announcer That's all it's Tom Brady I understand and he will get better because it is Tom Brady know what he does You know what I just end up being somehow the best announcer because he's just gonna work harder than What I didn't like about Tom today is that he was announcing the Deshaun Watson game and he, I, this is not his fault,

but that's a game where you want the announcers to be a little bit more mean. You know, you want the announcers to like call out when you see quarterback playing like dog shit and talk about the contract and be like, what is even going on? They miss Joe Flacco. Jamis Winston is waiting right there. You want to, you want to announce that it's not afraid to just like step in the mud a little Bit and for Tom's first game. He was definitely not going to do that Well, it probably was so like Tom Brady doesn't even understand how someone could do the things that Sean Watson was doing

Yeah, he can't analyze he can't he he doesn't it doesn't make sense to him Well, he could analyze some of the stuff if you thought about some of the things Robert Kraft has been doing So you be I Well you could have analyzed some of the stuff if you thought about some of the things Robert Kraft has been doing. Sure. So you B? I didn't listen enough. I was taking notes and I was also flipping around to different games so I didn't listen enough. B?

I need, that's the only thing with the, like I would like to get like a Sunday night or Monday won't happen because they have the afternoon game, Sunday or Monday to really, that's when you can really see like. the reaction is what this announcer is okay? They're made up, so I I listen to a lot of it I think that people are not gonna be happy Tom Brady got it I think that they'll say Greg Olsen's better, but again. This is the first first rep Tom Tom has had so and I'll get better What do you think? Max what you say Johnny Fanta? Oh, yes. Oh,, Max? What are you going to say? Johnny Fanta?

Oh, yes. Oh, I forgot. We got to play this video. So Johnny Fanta, our guy, Johnny Fanta. This is how bad the Browns are. This is how bad Deshaun Watson is. Cleveland, the Cleveland Browns organization has officially ticked Johnny Fanta off.

Ticked? Ticked. He is ticked off, PFT. He is ticked off. Can you pull it up? It's a TV that looks like it's in a... It's Lake Erie. Oh yeah, it is Lake Erie. It's... This is as mad as you can get Johnny Fanta and again, he was ticked off. I have it here. I have it up here. Okay. Do you want to watch it? No, just listen to it Yeah, we can listen to it. You ready for this? Yep The only thing that's nice right now is the Sun that's shining it shouldn't be that was utterly embarrassing

pathetic disgraceful shameful you gave that guy under center 230 million dollars, fully guaranteed. $230 million dollars, fully guaranteed. He's not great. He's not good.

He's not even average. Right now I put him on par with Bryce Young or Daniel Jones. He can go stand in line with them. Rip the bandaid off before it's too late because the rest of that locker room knows it. Deshaun Watson's done. That first half against Dallas was an utter joke. I'm tired of hearing about rust. I'm tired of hearing excuses.

I'm tired of hearing that the two time NFL coach of the year it's all his fault. Folks, he can't play. It ain't happening except reality. I'm ticked. Oh, ticked. I'm ticked. And I don't, did you watch the video?

No, but it sounds like he's almost PO'd. Cause you didn't get to see it. This is what he looked like when he was doing it. Yeah. That's a ticked man. His full bronze gear. He's ticked. His a ticked man. His full Browns gear. He's ticked. His big ticked energy.

Folks, I'm ticked. Yeah. This is not good for the Cleveland Browns. No, they lost Shani Fanta. And if you're a Browns fan, it's so depressing to watch that and to think about the money that you're paying them. And if Kevin Stefanski has an honest conversation with him, and he was like, hey, would you just rather not play

and still get the money, Deshaun Watson would definitely say yes. Yeah. A hundred percent. Look at that face. Yeah. Johnny Fanta. He's, he's peed. He's ticked. He's ticked off. He's right though. Sean Watson is on par with those guys. Go stand in line with them. Go stand in line with the sad line. He is so bad. And uh, yeah, it was painful to watch. It was painful, painful to watch. Especially with Jameis just on the sidelines, ready to go. He's ready. He also, Johnny Fata brought up a good point in that video.

No one, and I know there's been injuries and there's year out and all that stuff, but no one has had the benefit of, oh, he's got rust more than Sean Watson. Yeah. Well, he's been rusty for four years. He was rusty for being under investigation. Yeah. And then he was rusty from demanding a trade, demanding a trade. Then he was rusty from an energy or injury. Yeah. And he was rusty from another injury. It was like, Oh, he's only played a few games in the last four years. Well, that's his fault. And it doesn't matter. He stinks. you're just Sean Watson They just said hey if you don't play for the rest of the season just hang out

We won't even activate you on set. What do you do? Yeah, what would you do if you're Dashaun? Would you just probably move out of the country? Yeah, I would he's isn't he tight with Saudi Arabia member There's that picture of him hanging out with the sheiks. Yeah. Yeah go overseas. He's already there. Look at that Just play the end again this dumb tic because they can actually see it. He's I mean, he's the best Johnny Fanta. Play. It ain't happening. Except reality. I'm ticked. It's seriously like if I was if I was Jimmy Haslam's Assistant I would I would hurt Harley run into the suite and just be like sir We've lost Johnny Fanta. Yeah, and that would that would be the moment where you have to change everything This is it and it man before the game

You had Miles Garrett going to the Muni lot and hanging out with those people there getting all up I know you wanted it to be so great and then the Cowboys it makes it so much worse that it was a Cowboys It was the national game now. You're embarrassed too. Yeah, if you're a Cowboys fan, you're very very happy with how today went Yeah, yeah, I mean the Cowboys look good. I think the Cowboys are also one of those teams that like they were People have been so I don't know like oh every year is the same. They're really good in the regular season They don't do anything in the playoffs that they might have gotten a little underrated going into this season they were two and a half point dogs in this game yeah that's a crazy line that's looking back yes that's weird we're going to look back at the end of the season when the cowboys have 11 12 wins in the in the browns have a

230 million dollar quarterback that they can't even play and be like what was that line also the offensive line did not look as good in cle. No, maybe that's a, that's a Callahan they have. Yeah. And they've been moving parts around and everything. Yeah. Um, okay. Uh, last two chargers, Raiders chargers, 22 Raiders, 10. This is just hardball. This is hardball through and through. I don't know. Can we, can you pull up the, the hardball? I got a game ball, pull up my quote treat of it. Cause it's just hard bought. He, that team, this is what we knew when we went to LA and we saw like him in his element, they are going to be, don't bet against them. That's what he said to us. He's like, don't, I don't know if you had been honest, but it wouldn't bet against us. Please sound for this. This is hard, but getting a game ball from the owner after the game.

He's just freaking out, screaming so happy. He's got him juiced up. They were fighting in the end zone. Yeah, he cares so much about that ball too. He's so I guarantee you he takes very good care of every game ball that he gets. Yeah. It all means something to him. The fight in the end zone. He, that's when you knew that Harbaugh was in his element. This team is not that talented, but he's going to get them to believe that they can win any game and they will win a couple games because of that. It was just great to see him back out there. The one thing I would say about the Chargers, they got to get ironed out. Harbaugh went up to Herbert before the game to do his patented, he hits his quarterback

on the top of the pads, on the side of the pads and on the back Herbert thought he was going in for a hug and he went to hug him hard was they were just hard balls Harbaugh is not a hugger. Yeah, he's not a hugger. We also way hugs is by trying to wrestle you Yeah, right. Let's do the ground. It's really competitive hugging. We also had an all-time Harbaugh before the game He announced the Chargers changed the number of six foot four It's really competitive hugging. We also had an all-time Harbaugh before the game. He announced the Chargers changed the number of six foot four, 296 pound defensive tackle Scott Matlock this past week from number 99 to number 44. And now list them as their starting fullback.

And Matlock is expected to play both ways in Sunday's regular season opener versus Raiders. And Harbaugh said that Matlock is in such good condition he could play a doubleheader if needed. I love that. If there was a third way to play football he would be on that team too like a special team that was not offense or defense. We put him out there too. Even if you don't use him there that's just the heart like that's just a vibes thing like we made our defensive our nose tackle our fullback. Well he took the most intimidating looking guy. Yeah.

And he just said, we're going to have this man on our football field as often as possible. Right. Because he looks like a character from Game of Thrones. Yeah. It's so, yeah, I'm buying on the chargers just because of Harbaugh. This is why I wanted him for the Bears. It's tough to beat Jim Harbaugh on 3,000 days rest from the NFL. Yeah.

And he's 5- oh in season openers as a head coach in the NFL. Colts need to get him. Yep. Colts should actually offer him like a billion dollars just for week one. Should we, now we like Antonio Piercy also as a friend, but should we talk real quick about the punt?

Yeah, the punt is an interesting punt. You wanted to pin him deep, big cat. Yeah, so in the fourth quarter it was a 16 to 10 game and the Raiders had fourth and one at the Chargers 43. Yep, and They punted and I read that that was the first punt in your opponent's territory when you're trailing by that much in the fourth quarter Since I think it was Rex Ryan. Stathole sent it to me. I'm going to try to find it.

Excuse me. I think it was, yeah, it was Rex Ryan back when he was coaching, I think the Bills. Yeah, it was very bad. It was very bad. No, it was the Browns at the Colts at the 41 yard line week 7, 2012. They would also lose that game. Only team on record to punt well. Down one score, fourth and one, less than eight minutes left. It was a very bad punt. It was a very bad punt. And his logic was, we want to pin them deep and then our defense will make a stop. But the defense didn't make a stop. They went on a 92 yard drive to score a touchdown and win the game.

Yeah. So, not great start for the Raiders, but Harbaugh. Harbaugh. Harbaugh is back in the NFL. And it's good for everybody. It really, really is. We also had, speaking of stat holy, he did send me a great stat. So Alexander Madison scored a touchdown

on his first reception for the Raiders. And Josh Jacobs had 197 receptions as a Raider and never scored a touchdown receiving. Pretty crazy. Yeah. You just saw that and the new guy shows up first catch touchdown. Yeah. Lad McConkey also had a touchdown today. Yeah. Where he did the double Ole at the goal line. Yeah. And he looks like he, well the charges are, how should we say this, limited in terms of what they can do at wide receiver? Mm-hmm, but lad seems like he might be a good hardball guy. Yes. Oh big time. They're gonna feed him Okay, and then we also had a shitload of fights after the game. Did you guys see some of those fights?

Yeah, the fights were good. Yeah, they were good fights in terms of Raiders chargers I mean those two teams they they know when they're gonna submit a fight video. It has to be high quality Yeah has to have at least one, it has to be high quality. Has to have at least one knockout, has to have a moment where there's all ages and sexes fighting. You can't just have a routine two drunk guys fighting. It is weird to see a Chargers team and a Chargers fan base wearing their nice docile color blue uniforms engaging in like physical combat. Yeah. It's more

of a chill vibe but it with Harbaugh he's even making the fan base more physical. And there's yeah I mean the San Diego those days like they had to fight Raiders fans. The human body craves contact. Yeah. If you're a fan. All right last game from the afternoon Seattle 26 Denver 20. What a weird start to the game. The Broncos got two safeties on the Seahawks. They were up nine to eight at one point. Or no, they were up, yeah, I think they were up nine to eight. No, they were down nine to eight. Maybe they're fighting. Yeah, because there was a 10-9 score at some point. Everybody was like, oh, this is a normal score. There was an 8-3, then a 9-8, then the Seahawks, when they scored a touchdown, they didn't

get their two points, so it stayed 9-8 for a little bit. Then I think it was 13, it was 12-9 or something. It was a crazy game. Yeah, the first half was nuts. I think the record for safeties in an NFL game is three. It's three. And so we had two in the first half. Then it looked like they were going to get a third safety.

The Broncos went deep again, and they're running plays out of their end zone again, barely got out. I was hoping for a third safety at that point. And I will say once again, the safety in the NFL should be worth more than two points. Yes. Two points is not a big enough reward for how hard it is to get a safety.

Yeah. It should be four points, five points, one of those two, or maybe the other team just gets the ball on the one yard line. Yeah. If there's a safety. Yeah. I, so the, the, the score was, uh, at one point 10 to nine, there was one touchdown scored and two safeties in the rest of his field goals and the

team with 10 didn't have the, the touchdown, I don't think. Yeah. No, they didn't. Yeah. That's what was weird. It was like a 10, didn't have the touchdown, I don't think. Yeah, no they didn't. Yeah, that's what was weird. It was like a 10-9 score, which it doesn't look weird on the scoreboard. Right. And then you break it down and you're like,

what the fuck happened here? Yeah. Huh? This is crazy football. Speaking of crazy football, Bo Nix, huh? Bo Nix, I don't say this lightly, feel free to disagree, Big Cap. Okay.

Bo Nix might be the heir apparent to Jameis. Yeah, he is a little bit loose with it. Like he's, he's one of the funnier on field quarterbacks because everything that he does, he does with supreme confidence. Oh yeah. Always. And bone it. And when he throws interception, he throws the fuck out of the interception. If you have made plays, like if you followed Bo nicks in his college career, for anyone who's listening, he's just an NFL fan. The way Bo Nix became Bo Nix is not what we saw last year in Oregon. It was the games he played at Auburn where it would be like 10 30 at night and Bo Nix would just be making insane throws that had no, no quarterbacks should throw and they would work. And so he

still got that in him. And yeah, he, you're right. You mean he might be the heir apparent. We'll see. I'm just putting the tickler out there. We can remind ourselves this a little bit, see how it shakes out. But yeah, when he makes a great play, it's electric. And when he throws interception, it's like, there's nobody within 20 yards of the linebacker. He just threw the interception., he throws across his body off platform It's the bowler coaster. Yeah, he is he is When he's at his best he's very very good and we said his worst He's very very bad and they asked Sean Payton about it after the game and he said that everyone else around Bo Nicks

Needs to play better. Oh So we got some favorite son. We got some favorite son big big cat. Sean Sanders talking about his son, the starting quarterback, because who, um, who would be responsible for making everyone on the team play better with every somebody that has that job title. Yeah, that'd be the head. I think that might be the head coach. I should have gone with Dion Payton there. Sean Sanders. People like, what are you talking about? Yeah. Dion Payton. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You, you're right. PFD. I would say the head coach. Yeah. The head coach would probably do that. Uh,

Sean Payton, I think he's probably gonna, he's going to do the opposite of what he did with Russell Wilson last year. Yeah. He's throwing everybody else into the bus. Yeah. He's like, well, not everyone else saw what was in Bo Nix's backpack. Yeah, that's true. Listen, as someone who watched a bad quarterback performance today, I'm still, I'm grading all the rookie quarterbacks, especially on the road. Like that was a tough place to play. He's a, you know what? He's a gunslinger. Yeah. That's what Bo Nicks is for sure. Yeah. Uh, but yeah, the, uh, I love to see Seahawks. That's a great throwback. Awesome throwback. Those are great throwback. Yep No, that should be there giants. That should be their everyday uniform agreed. I love it agreed

Okay, shoot. We should talk about Rams Lions real quick That was a thrilling game the Lions are 1-0 win in overtime I have to look it up because this is just off the top my head I'm gonna guess Cooper Cup had probably like 15 catches Because this is just off the top of my head, I'm going to guess Cooper Cup had probably like 15 catches. He had 14. He was dominating. That was that one drive where he just kept on feeding him.

I think the Rams are going to be just fine. The Lions are very good. And if they don't, you know, that one interception golf had, they could have won that regulation. But those are two very good teams in my mind. I'm going to say moral victory for the Rams, Except for the Pooka injury. Hopefully he's okay. Yeah. So we don't know how long he's going to be out for, but if you're a Rams fan, you can look at this game and be like, okay, we're still going to be good. Yeah. Maybe, maybe based on what we saw in the playoffs last year, maybe slightly better than last

year. Yeah. I mean, Cooper cup, that was, it was an insane 14 catches, 110 yards. And then if you're the lions fan your David Montgomery's an absolute monster He took over that entire overtime and then Jameson Williams, maybe his arrival Like I know he's had big I know he's had some flashes, but this felt like his arrival with 121 yards Yeah, and he caught a nice long pass to yeah, he's so fast when he gets going in the open field Yeah, I think addition by subtraction by missing Josh Reynolds. Yeah, I'd caught a nice long pass too. Yeah. He's so fast when he gets going in the open field. Yeah. I think addition by subtraction by missing Josh Reynolds.

Yeah, I'd agree. I'd agree. All right. So we should do a little Monday night preview before we do who's back. Let me do row back question. R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com promo code take 20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, row back promo code take 20% off your first purchase qzips polos hoodies joggers shorts row back promo code take memes row back question yes are you ready to join the one and oh crew I'm very excited to watch the New York Jets play

football on Monday night okay how are you feeling about the game do you think that they are going to win the game I I? Am very nervous. I just want to watch Aaron Rodgers play a full game in terms of winning I'm not I'm not guaranteeing anything You're not guaranteeing anything besides Besides they're gonna. They're gonna play extremely hard Extremely hard extremely hard and if Rodgers hurt, you're gonna do a suicide bombing. That's facts. Five snaps and a season ending injury, yes.

So if it happens in six, you're not. No, I'll probably just quit. What about four? Four he has to. Yeah, anything under five. Anything under five. Remember that awkward question you asked him? Yeah. Oh, come on.

I mean, that was bad. All right memes you got to give us a so DraftKings doing a NFL no sweat touchdown bet for all customers opt in get your no sweat token in place an NFL touchdown bet If your touchdown bet doesn't hit you'll get it back as a bonus bet So download DraftKings Sportswork app use code take that's code take to get you a no sweat token tonight Give us a first touchdown score PFTft you and i have to find a combined uh touchdown score so like a mcaffrey and debo to have two touchdowns first touchdown yeah come on come on i'll go brze Hall. Breeze Hall. He just breaks one, goes all the way.

Okay. It's gonna be my pick. We could do Breeze Hall and Christian McCaffrey plus 140. I kinda like that. And it's also, the nice thing about that is if Breeze Hall scores two touchdowns, Christian McCaffrey scores zero, we still win. We still win that one, yeah.

So that might be the pick. I like that one a lot. Yeah. You gotta do two running backs then, yeah. What about Kittle? Kittle. We could get Kittle. For the pick. I like that one a lot. Yeah, you got it. You do about running backs on yeah What about what about Kittle? Kittle could get Kittle for the people Brees Hall and George Kittle plus 280 I love that for the people the people I like it'll make it happen. It'll make it happen gambling problem call 1-800 gambler in New York call

8778 open wire text hope and why four six seven three. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boothill Casino and Resort in Kansas, 21 and over, age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario, opt in each week to get one no sweat for each game day. No sweat bonus bet issued based

on amounts of losing qualifying bet. Max reward varies. Bonus bets expire 168 hours after issuance for additional terms or responsible gaming resources see DKNG co-slash FT ball because I'm gonna bet the Jets, too I'm extremely nervous. I started getting nervous or at around four o'clock today Calm down a little bit, but now I'm full back to I'm nervous, but I'm very excited to watch him play How did mr. P Pear do this weekend?

I believe, what was the Rams line? He would cover if he picked the Lions. I think he picked the Rams and then he picked the Eagles. Okay, so he's one and two. Is he going to pick, are you going to release a play for Monday Night Football? Yep. Okay, and no funny business. No funny business. No funny business

No funny business because you know this this this turtle is your turtle Yeah Okay, no funny. No funny. No, I promise no funny business. No funny business. I promise Sounds like there's gonna be funny. I promise no funny if he picks the 49ers you're gonna air that. Yep. Okay But mr. Pear loves you. So you can't stand on the side of the Jets and have them come to you. That's true. Yeah.

No funny business. I'll do sure enough. Alright, should we wrap up with who's back of the week? Hank, are you okay? Yeah. You sure? Yeah. Hank, did you like watching the game today? Well, it was all like the small TV. So it's kind of hard to see we had a

We had the Patriots game on on a quad box So I could barely watch yeah, that was tough when I had to break to you because it was there's seven TVs eight games So that's where we had it. Meem just keeps cutting the hank during during this. In the middle of this. What a dick. He's out to get you. Hollywood, Hollywood memes.

That's fucked up Hollywood memes. Uh, yeah, I thought you'd be a little more excited to be one and oh, I mean, I guess this is just the difference. I was. I'm so excited to be one of0. I mean, I guess this is just the difference. I'm so excited to be 1-0. Today was awesome. Yeah, I think Hank cares about just being a winner. You are a winner for this day. I said I'm infinitely more excited for the rest of the season than before.

Okay, yeah, that's true. Wait, what's infinity times zero? Oh, yeah. I think that's still zero. Well, I was at a one. Yeah., so you are infinity your infinity excited. Yeah, okay You couldn't possibly be more excited. This is what you look like. It's not as fucking here It is hot as fucking here. It is almost midnight. I Agree with all those statements

And you did you know Hank almost got a home one yesterday? How close? Six inches. Oh damn. Call that two penises. Was it on camera? No. That would have been tough. Wait a minute you parred?

No I'm in. It's a joke. It's a golf joke. Sorry. You wouldn't understand. You're a betting guy not a golf guy. I don't give a shit about the camera thing. I'm not going to film myself hitting up every time I hit a par 3.

But if you had come in here and you'd beat your chest and you were like, I got a hole in one today and there was no video of it, that would have been tough. What is it? I actually think weirdly I would believe it more if there was no video of it. Yeah, like I don't like, that's one of those things people can say whatever they want to say Yeah happen even with Jake's on camera people said it Well, that was fake Right, like people would say that I wouldn't care like I would know, you know

I think getting it I think almost keeping it to yourself not keeping it yourself. Yeah, I would tell you yeah Yeah, but that would have been sick if you got it. Yeah, that would have rocked. First shot? What do you mean first shot? I don't know. Maybe it was a breakfast ball? No. That's the worst, right?

That would be a nightmare. Like that would be, because I take so many shots off the tee boxes. I think someday in my life I might get a hole in one, but it will 100% be a second shot. Like if you hit your first shot into the water Yeah, and say go into the drop zone you just hit from the tee on the correct when it goes in that's how I'd be pissed Off. Yeah, that's how it's gonna happen for me or by yourself. I mean you guys get by yourself will be traumatic Yeah, I would never cough by myself. So that's not a problem. Yeah, you have a problem if you're drinking alone or golfing alone. Mm-hmm problem

All right drinking alone or golfing alone? Problem. Now, if you're drinking while golfing alone, that's cool. Two negatives make a positive. Yeah, that's an awesome time. All right. Here's our last ad before we do who's back of the week. Yeah. Before great soccer football with the boys. It is before we get to whom's back of the week. It's brought to you by our great friends over at Coors Light. The mountains are blue.

We got some Coors Lights right here on the desk. They look crispy, some crispy boys adorning the part of my take studio right now. And if you were watching football this weekend, I hope you were drinking Coors Light. The mountains turn blue when the beer is cold. And on college football Saturdays, it's never short on intrigue,

especially when there's some iconic rivalry games going on out there. But you can add to the excitement on Saturdays with Coors Light. They teamed up with DraftKings for the free to play college football pick and pools. Where you pick winners for a chance to win big. When rivalries heat up, it's time to choose chill, then reach for an ice cold Coors Light. When you're looking to keep it chill, there's only one beer to choose. That's Coors Light. The mountains on the bottles and cans even turn blue when your beer is cold. Coors Light is mountain cold refreshment.

Coors Light is cold lager, cold filtered, cold packaged. Coors Light is the absolute best. I love drinking Coors Light. When the college football rivalry is that you're watching Heat Up, choose chill with Coors Light and Draft Kings. Get Coors Light delivered straight to your door with Instacart by going to CoorsLight.com slash take 21 and over eligibility restrictions apply. Void wear prohibited. See terms at DraftKings.com slash Coors Light. Pick them. Celebrate responsibly Coors Brewing Company, Golden, Colorado.

Okay, who's back the week, Hank? My who's back the week is Kendrick Lamar. Yeah. Yeah. He was announced to be doing the Super Bowl halftime show. Wow. Wow. I mean that's What is Drake's reaction when he sees this news? He can't be happy. It is weird I think the next two Super Bowls are in LA or the next Super Bowl after this New Orleans and then

Is it I know this one's New Orleans, but I think I believe the next they're going back to LA. Yeah I believe I Don't think Miami may Santa Clara feels like it's been a while since we had Miami your fake California your fake news well, California. Oh, yeah, that's not a kinder. It's decidedly. Yeah, that's nor Cal I don't know if you know there's a difference between Norcal and SoCal either way I don't know if you know there's a difference between Norcal and SoCal either way Then more than it's going to so fight they should have had it be Lil Wayne Lil Wayne Halftime show in New Orleans would have been I mean there's a lot of edible yeah a lot of musicians from Louisiana and

Yeah, what a guy from LA to do it. Why didn't they do and then they're gonna be in California next year Yeah, that's from California. So But there's rumors. I mean, this is just like internet, internet, internet debate, but there's rumors cause Jay Z like he's the one that I guess picks the halftime shows now. The past few. That's his job. Wait, what? Yeah. He's on the board. Oh, I remember that there was something with like him and Goodell. Yeah. Um, and if if he illuminati shit if he had gotten Lil Wayne Lil Wayne probably would have brought out Nikki Minaj and Drake And Jay-Z doesn't like Drake. So he basically did the opposite. But who's gonna do the next one? Also Kendrick Lamar. Yeah, they're just gonna make it so that Drake can never watch a Super Bowl again

What if Drake would there be any no? What if Drake was like hey Kendrick you beat me can I come out for the Super Bowl? Never do that. Okay, I was just boy can drink but he knows Drake knows he like come out for the song when you call Me a pedophile. Yeah. Yeah, she's like here. Just do it one last time in my face He's not gonna be crazy Hendrix. He's not gonna be able to say certified pedophile during the Super Bowl, right? No, he's gonna go certified and then let everyone else everyone there's gonna be 70,000 people saying pedophile. Correct. Yeah, it's gonna be tough for Drake. Yeah, very tough for Drake. That's a brutal and like he can't go to the

Super Bowl. No, I don't know if he goes usually, but one of his many teams probably in it. Well, I saw a picture of him wearing a Niners jacket. I don't know if he's a Niners fan. He loves every team. He had a new song that came out this week and that was good. Oh, okay. Trash, strike a call and it's probably a Niner.

That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Good who's backing? Thanks. I didn't know that part about Jay Z. Yeah. Is he, I don't know what his job is with the NFL, but I do know that he's like in charge of a lot of like cultural stuff for Roger Goodell. But picking the Superbowl halftime show seems like the easiest job ever. Well, it's been all it's been rappers all three years. So wait so Roger Goodell essentially like took the like but I have a black friend it like made a job out of it?

Yeah yeah no no because Big Cat you're not telling the full story. It was like after Left Shark they're like we need no what it was you can tell us we'll do anything what happened was Roger though was like a lot of the players in the NFL or African-american they think that I'm doing a shitty job I'm gonna hire Jay-Z so they can't be mad at me anymore got it that's that's pretty much what he did got it Jerry Jones taking a knee yeah Jay-Z doesn't care about black and white. JZ cares about green. Oh That's true. That was deep. It's deep. That was deep Okay, PFT

My who's back the week is Texas. We'll talk about on Wednesday for college football, but Texas is back Yeah, big time back. Texas is legit. Michigan might be ass hook them I think Texas is no no Texas very very very but it they both things can be true. Yeah, very very good I think their defense is awesome I think that their running game is sick their Quinn you was throwing the ball all over the place like nobody Nobody is talking about arch manning playing which is it's crazy if you were to think about that a couple years ago I committed to Texas but Quinn yours is so good that they're making people forget about arch Yeah, which is pretty incredible

I still like I told you the Longhorns were my title pick at the start of the season I love the Longhorns right now As he's the game against George's my pants already tight for that one. I'm rooting for you to have Texas I do think you've picked Texas like four years. Oh, yeah, I have I picked Texas a lot Well, I last year and I was close year before not the. Not the year before. But last year I was close. Yeah, you were very close. I was very close last year. I feel like I'm going to be closer this year. This year, I feel like whoever wins that Georgia Texas game, that's going to be the winner. Yeah. They're going to win the whole thing.

Yeah. I mean, we will talk Wednesday, but NIU, that was my who's back. I mean, that was Marcus Freeman. Yikes. Yeah. I want to see what that's like on the Peacock show. Yeah. And are you shouting at you Thomas Hammock? Awesome. That speech after was like why we watched college football.

Him crying and being like this is a family and all these guys that could passed over. It was so awesome. Now is there any podcast any sports podcasts out there that said Notre Dame guaranteed to go undefeated now after they won week one. Yeah They should have let us know if you know of a podcast that that said that because I'll kick their ass. They should have yeah Why do teams it always comes out when when the bygames have been why do teams pay other teams because they don't lose them When the bygames have been why do teams pay other teams because they don't lose them usually

So in I you got say like 1.2 million because they come kick their ass. Do they negotiate? Yeah, they get a free win So what happens like they pay these teams money because they want to put people in the stands They want to win a game and they want to be on national television playing in a game against a team that they will beat And and the coaches want to get to seven, eight wins. And to get to seven, eight wins, you can throw in two wins that you can just basically check off and be like, all right, now I only got to win six games and then I lose. But why won't the teams want to play those games anyway? Like you've got a chance to beat a ranked opponent or whatever.

The shit kicked in most of the time. You'd rather play a worse opponent and win. Yeah. Like Bowling Green, who actually played really well against Penn State, last year they played against Michigan. They got like a million injuries and they derailed their entire season. So it's probably not fun playing those games,

except you have the NIU. So Marcus Freeman's got a little bit of an issue because this is now, so we said last week, Marcus Freeman won the big game against Texas A&M, which Brian Kelly couldn't do. The one thing Brian Kelly did do was not lose the little games, and Marcus Freeman loses the little games. So he's lost to Marshall as double digit home favorite, Stanford as a double digit home favorite, and now NIU. Our guy Chris Felica had a stat since the start of the 2022 season there have been 28 losses by a home

favorite of at least 16 points in college football. Notre Dame has three of them. That's not good. I honestly, their fans got it. Like it's it's the they have a double whammy of like Notre Dame such a cool stadium and like a hallowed place that teams get so juiced up to play there and then some like a lot of their fans are so old that they just don't get loud enough. That's sleepy spot and it feels like every year that 230 kickoff like game they should win. But shout out to you, dogs. If you're a dog, if you're an NIU professor, give all the students a day off class on Monday.

Yeah, it should be a holiday. It should. The I don't understand how a Notre Dame, a Michigan. Like, I understand how Wisconsin can get not a great quarterback in the transfer portal. Hank, shout out you. I don't understand how Notre Dame, every quarterback should want to play like I don't get it Riley Leonard seems like a nice guy. He's not a very good quarterback. Yes, it's a tough spot for the Irish Yeah, like what's gonna happen if they did they did lose to a ranked opponent Northern Illinois to get ranked 25

If if this was their only loss this season, where does that leave Notre Dame? I think they'll get in, which is our good friend, college football expert, Tom Frinelli, pointed out that that's why he doesn't like the 12-team playoff, which is, I love the 12-team playoff because I just like having more teams involved, but it's a fair point on it that Notre Dame could run the table and definitely still be in because they'll they'll put Notre Dame in if they're 11 and one that would rock though if Notre Dame somehow got into the college football playoff won the whole thing and then NIU could just declare themselves national champion. Yeah. Yeah. Although they'll probably lose

a Mac game on like a Tuesday night. Yeah. But so crazy wind. It would be so awesome if NIU was in if if a Mac T was in the playoff Yeah, they can I know they can yeah But yeah, that's if Notre Dame wins, I mean look they're only 18th now, so if they you have to think that if they keep winning Yeah, I'm looking who's ahead of them right now like those teams all hard schedules and all these teams play each other. Yeah, so Yeah, no dream. I mean now now you look at their schedule a little differently because like, oh shit, they may not be good. But yeah, we'll do full college football. Talk about everything on Wednesday. Any who's

back from the booth? Anything we missed? No. Nope. Okay. How was the wedding? It was good. Shout out, Ali and Luke. Every weekend. Shout outs every every Monday I guess. Oh shit I just thought of something. What? That would be a good punishment although that would ruin my life. Have you go to? Like four back to back weddings. A wedding every week. But it's like AWL's weddings I do have fun I that would be pretty funny as a punishment you had to go to four weddings in a row and a funeral every and one funeral and one funeral yeah he's right he's right that would be the punishment that might be our Super Bowl picks for weddings and a funeral what is funny about going to a funeral nothing's funny about it

listen if it's like an older person and they were a listener. We're supposed to make content out of this. What would be funny about going to a funeral? You're wrong because there's... No, you're wrong. There's someone who's listening right now who has had a death close to them who either was a listener to the show or like has a great sense of humor that would definitely be like, yeah, have them come. I feel like you also decided the stream thing when like we did the drive to LA.

I didn't decide the stream. No, Max. Like he's just decided that we also kind of- Should we make this the picks punishment? Let's not do any rash decisions right now. What if the funeral was a celebrity? So not somebody that had any personal connections? Jimmy Carter.

Alright, we could say four weddings, but that would be four AWO weddings in a month. Anyone? in a month? Anyone? Memes is the one that's show up? It's easier than a nine-dollar stand-up. It really is. Alright, we can think about it. I mean, it would be funny for the AWLs too. They just get whoever loses the picks. You can map it out to whatever month you want you know and just be Like yeah four weddings in this month done

God that would be hell for me Four weddings four states the travel would be well. It would just be so much work I probably wouldn't be able I would probably just do my normal schedule No, you'd have to go to an a W. You'd have to be an a listener Invite you to the wedding like you can't be something my whole entire life is just right my normal schedule. No, you'd have to go to an AW. You'd have to be a listener invites you to the wedding. Like you can't be someone you know. But then my whole entire life is just. Right. Like I already go to weddings. You'd also have to tell them like when you'd make small talk with like the friends and family at the wedding party they're like why

are you here? Oh, I'm being punished. Yeah. Weddings are also so fun. You have to. Well not when you're almost 40. Yeah, but like this weekend wedding was great And this would be a this this this would hurt me the most So I mean if you guys think that's a funny punishment if we could do it And will we still do second and last? Yes, second has to go to a funeral No, no One funeral what if memes blows himself up pug pug just goes oh my god. What do you said funeral? Why oh you walked in me?

I Don't know I Pft and I I think it would be I think there'd be someone who'd be like you'd be an honor if you came to the funeral I'd give a speech but like Yeah, the a-day yeah... people... death is part of life. Facts. That is sad. I understand if death is part of life.

But think of that, like, that caption online. Like, podcast shows up to funeral to make content. No, no. We're not gonna show up with a selfie cam and be like, Hey, what's up here for the funeral? No, we're not going to cut video of it. We're just going to go. Like there have been AWS who've passed away. Right. You think that like someone wouldn't reach out and be like, Hey, my friend was a big listener. It would be an honor if you came to the funeral. And they're like, yes, this is a punishment. You have to you you have you don't want to say punish. You know, those are sad you say yourself

What's giving that you can table the funeral? Yeah, well, let's listen in my funeral. I want everyone to fucking roast me Death is part of life. I'm not even be there Think about it. I won't be at my funeral. I want the stone cold music to come on Yeah halfway through then everyone expect you to pop out of the casket. I do want one of us to fake our deaths. That would be so funny. I think it's doable. It would be so funny if we did a funeral and then just, yeah.

For the views? Haha, he's still alive. It would kind of ruin all of our credibility. People would be really pissed after, but it would be very funny. Undertaker gift. For us. I could go off the grid for a few years. Yeah we know. No not years. I was thinking a week. We could say you're dead for a week.

Tomorrow I'm out if he's. Yeah that's true. Yeah what memes funeral. I'm out. You can do whatever you want with it. Hank fakes his own death and people are like why does his handicap keep updating on the US Golf Association? memes on the part of my take Instagram you'll be live for the first five I'll be with them. I'll be with them. Okay game so I will can you live stream the first five? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? I'll do it from the Instagram the the the people that can't figure out the ESPN direct TV should should be like chart tried in the Supreme Court What do you mean and possibly like execute? What are we talking about now? I I don't know I have every The people that can't figure out the ESPN Direct TV should be like tried in the Supreme Court.

What do you mean? And possibly like executed. What are we talking about now? I don't know. I have every, uh, I pay for it. I can't watch ESPN in my house. Oh, what do you mean? You have direct TV.

Yeah. And they, they black out ESPN. They're going to figure it out tomorrow before Monday football. It's always the deadlines. I hope so. Cause right now you're being pitted in a war like direct TV. I'm trying to watch college football. He's telling you. No you weren't. Yes I was. No you weren't. Yes I was. No you weren't. Yes I was. Telling you I was trying to watch a Tennessee game. I could not. ESPN is telling you the direct TV is the devil. You don't know who to believe. Yeah. That's what I'm

saying. They should all be tried. Tomorrow will be figured out because you can't... Monday Night Football... Yeah. I honestly think that they'll have a deal tomorrow night before the game because they just can't have Monday Night Football not be there. It's Monday Night Football. I know. You've missed what? College football right now?

And US Open. But you haven't missed an NFL game now, right? That's exactly what that's when the deadline happens. What about the app? Can you use the app? No, cuz the app you can watch like ESPN plus games, but the app you have to know you're acting. Yeah Come over my house tomorrow All right. All right. You're welcome. I would love to watch the game with you. Okay. Okay nice. Yeah. Have a great time. Talk or not talk. For the whole time. Awesome. What about a pet funeral? Yeah. Yeah. A bird. I don't want to go to a dog's funeral. A bird. I'd go to a bird's

funeral. I think I could drag myself hold on to a funeral you think you You'd rather go to a human funeral You're like you're like it's too disrespectful to go to a dog's funeral, but you know a human that would be for it's a human No, I'm max with a human requested it and also passed away. I'm thinking of I'm not thinking of you're thinking of like a fucking like 20 year old I'm thinking of like a 90 year old Lip-sel a great life. I Just don't think it really mattered I do think people would be yes

There's a there's a decent amount obviously not everyone in every course not and I wouldn't expect everyone absolutely people who would be like I would like that be awesome if they came to my funeral. Yeah Yes, there are people listening right now. They're like, yeah, I'm gonna tell my significant other if I pass away, please invite them And we'll be there. Well Whoever one of us the worst gambler And for the last month We're all gonna be talking about how much we don't want to go to it month of the show leading up to it we're all gonna be talking about how much we don't want to go to it yeah whatever shows your funeral is gonna be motherfucking the cult under their

breath all right great show boys good to be back football numbers 12 8 56 let's go nine Three Chain plug 97 21 plugs about to nail this Looks so good 65 Reverse love you guys. So So So so So Thanks for watching!