Pardon My Take - NFL Week 3, Fastest 2 Minutes, Recap Of Every Game, The Pinky Team Is Announced, And A Name Roast

Episode Date: September 23, 2019

NFL Week 3 is complete. Fastest 2 minutes. Recapping every NFL game from Sunday. Is Derek Carr on the hot seat. Big Cat names his Pinky Bet. Antonio Brown cut. Say something nice about the Dolphins. Are we really doing this Kyle Allen? Daniel Jones is electric. Phil Rivers never disappoints. And Teddy 2 Gloves keeps the Saints afloat. Quick CFB recap with Notre Dame/Georgia and Michigan/Wisconsin. Who's back of the week including the Cubs sucking. Football guy of the week. Stay Classy Clemson for doing a movie at halftime of your game and Pardon My French. You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, add free on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, NFL week three recap. We do the fastest two minutes. We're gonna talk a little college football. We have who's back in the week, football guy of the week.

It is no guest Monday. We're gonna talk about every single game. I'm excited. You're excited. Are you excited? PFT extremely excited. I'm excited. Hank, are you excited?

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Oh we're gonna rock down to electric revenue. It's part of my take presented by Barstool Sports. Welcome to part of my take presented by the cash app. Go download it right now, use code Barstool. You get $5 for free, $5 to ASPCA. today is Monday September 23rd week three I'm a little horse here boom better than being a big jackass we start in the city of brotherly love where the Lions check their luggage but brought their carry-on Johnson that is that's

good one boom Carson Wentz was throwing so many wounded ducks he could tile the roof of the Taj Mahal and the Eagles waterboarded themselves with drops all afternoon long Marvin Gay Jones said what's going on let's get it on as Matt Patricia was hot just like an oven in his sweatshirt on the sideline because when you get that feeling it's sexual healing with a Ticonderoga number two Jamal Spiro Agnew returned a kickoff for a touchdown pardoning the Lions and allowing them to escape Philadelphia at the height of Watergate scandal Lions 27 Eagles 24 what we're good we go to Foxboro where the Jets saw the Patriots

and said let's give them something to talk about talking about love love your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus hey hey who let's try Wingo in here the weekend started with turmoil for the Patriots as Tom Brady kicked Antonio Brown out of his Marshall new house faster than Bridget Moynihan after announcing she was pregnant I said I'm high said I'm high said I'm high and you said I'm low said I'm low said I'm low and that's for Patriots minus 21 gamblers they got stemming the balls after Jared Stenham threw a late-pick sex the Patriots kept the train rolling but lost trillion element to a rib injury which

will now allow him to suck his own dick even more on his Instagram thirst traps Patrick 30 judge 14 to Western New York where the 2-0 Buffalo Bills welcome the 0-2 Cincinnati Bengals the Bills came out to a commanding 14-0 first half lead as Skoll Beasley dipped out and made a few long cuts giving the Bengals the spin as they puked in their mouth the Bengals came Tyler Backstreet Boyd in the second half getting the offense in sync but it was Frank Gorbachev who led a Russian attack to seal the game and they're hitting AZ 5 for the Bengal season but the meltdown is imminent did they really shoot the

dogs boom no teach don't think about things like that no one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills Bills 21 Bengals 17 some spread open the frozen tundra where they had to go to Phillip Lindsay Lohan was a large dose of Marquez Valtrex stantling the two errands hooked up on Sunday and Mr. Aaron Jones and me tell each other fairy tales smiling in the bright lights no offense to the New York Jets but they're not coming through motto they're coming in stereo if everybody loves you you can never be lonely even if you exile your entire family the Packers are counting crows while Joe Flacco is missing the

Ravens Mick Fangio and three as the Broncos haven't found the win column yet Packers 27 Broncos 16 down to Indianapolis where Zach Pascal Siakam is a rising star in the Colts offense and Jim Ursay is drunkenly asking his fans why not Jacobi Berset for the future of the franchise don't pull the plug on the Colts kicker yet as Adam Vinitieri Shiavo came back from the dead on Sunday the Falcons fall to one and two as Matt Ryan Dunn was unable to complete his final drive too soon boom Colts 27 Falcons 24 over to Kansas City where Lamar Jack's son of Sam was talking to his underdogs trying to shock the world

with a win and arrowhead Mark was even more valuable than the ingram of coke with a nose for the goal line three different times Hattrick Mahomes had three scores and in the words of John Gruden when it comes to beating the cheese it's just too damn me cold hard man man man cheese 33 Ravens 48 Peter representatives they're outlining a new report they say outlined to the treatment of dolphins at the 3c world locations they claim these dolphins are suffering under inhumane conditions and are forced to perform tricks that cause them injuries and also that their living conditions are

unacceptable. Cowboys 31 dolphin 6 in beautiful San Diego where Stone Cold Steve Austin Eckler tried to stop a Texas mud hole but Carlos Santana Hyde was too smooth for the Chargers defense to Sean Michaels Watson kept talking oh sweet chin music and getting back up and Houston left the LA fans and her brick kid the Chargers will be Jordan Acons after this loss after they fall to one or two Houston 27 the Chargers 20. Kyle and cocaine Daniel Jones you better watch your speed come on mad gay don't kick it that way the Giants stole a game like they were crab legs. Giants 32 bucks 31 the G-man the New York football Giants the G-G-G-G-man

we finished in the city by the Bay as the Steelers visited Jimmy Eat World Garoppolo and the 49ers. George Kettle me this Kettle me that can a team of five turnovers win a football game they can when they're coached by the former Millennial Falcon Kyle Santana Han Solo and the 49ers are three and all or as my good friend Chewbacca would say Norris 24 Steelers 20 all right that was a great Chewbacca I thought you actually had a Chewbacca when I had my good friend Chewbacca there you go there's your Chewbacca I just told Hank to yawn and that would be the Chewbacca sound it's very true so week three in the bookstore we got Monday night football

coming up that was an aggressive that was aggressive over all week yeah it was there was some there were some aggressive jokes in there yeah and a bit of cherry Shival I think that plays well now that Boomer and Teaser actually back we have to step up our games to be the R rated Boomer and Teaser I think we did it so being the bad boys no guest Monday back we're gonna recap every single game on Sunday we're gonna talk about everything you can watch it on Barstool Gold go right now BarstoolGold.com slash PMT we will start so we'll go we'll go in a reverse order we'll obviously start with the one o'clock

but we have to at least mention the Sunday night game what we just watched Freddie Kitchens you're a dummy yeah you're a dummy that was we're a dumb dumb that was one of the most let's not say things we can't take back yeah you're a dumb dumb I watched it you're a dumb dumb that was a winnable game it was a very bad play call on fourth and nine not even they'll never see it coming okay so fourth and nine draw call what's going on the fact that your offensive line can't block for shit and you're calling basically everyone to go downfield when you need like you know there was multiple times a game where it felt like all

the wide receivers were running 30 yard routes and you can't block right and can't block and they kept running 11 personnel I can't help but just call out the personnel group they should have gone more 22 personnel it's like teaching a little kid like how to do the alphabet we're just walking around saying it constantly now that we know how to count this but the end of the game you have first and goal from the four yard line you have three timeouts and you run every single play like it's desperation no time on the clock you don't have timeouts in your back pocket how about how about run up like run the

ball once how about maybe a screen I don't know try something other than everyone run in the end zone and Baker Mayfield runs for his life while his offensive line can't block that actually wouldn't have been a bad time to run a draw run there you have you have to keep doing the draw it eventually it'll work but it'll only work if you keep doing it they ran the same exact holy shit our hairs on fire we need to touch down on this play play like run the ball get three yards then you have first and goal on the water second goal on the one then you can just fucking push it in yeah it was crazy it was bad play calling

at the end I don't think he realized it was just kind of it was just kind of an ugly game in general but yeah he didn't know he didn't know that he had three timeouts at the end of the game because then when he shouldn't have called the timeout on fourth down when he should have kept all three timeouts at least made the Rams like run the run plays and then maybe get a punt block out there yeah he called the timeout can I throw this out there I think the Browns are better when they have a lot of distractions I didn't hear anything going into this game about Odell Beckham's watch or his visor or anything

shiny that he was wearing at all and he just they didn't go out there and play a good game they scored 13 points and it seemed like they were scratching clawing for anything that they got well their defense played well and the Rams obviously didn't play a great game either but I always judge it a little differently when you're playing a prime-time game on the road like the you know when you're a prime-time game on the road it's just win it doesn't matter as Mike Tomlin right but the Browns that was a winnable game and I don't see how you can blame anyone but Freddie kitchens there so they're now

one and two yeah and guess what they have more prime-time games coming up I think they play Monday night football in a couple weeks and this is what we talked about this all offseason the Browns and all the hype and all the expectations what happens if they start slow well now you got it and they've they've got a tough schedule and they're banged up in joke who's out for what like three four more weeks and they need them as well they need them they need another tight end and they're to block they couldn't block shit today no their office lines is very bad they could have used been rattlesburg or

social media account manager because it was bad they were they were getting passed by Aaron Donald left and right inside Dante Fowler was right Clay Matthews on his dad's induction ceremony no less wow showed up showed out big time the Browns need to figure out a way to like let's get the distractions go this week is actually gonna be good for the Browns really playing well I know I just know they're gonna be playing Colin Coward during the week because he's gonna have a lot of shit to talk so Baker put a little bit more food in Colin's dish so we can eat up and get some ratings this week that's gonna help

them there were no distractions going to this weekend which I feel like is a problem at home at the ratings oh and then they played Monday football at the 49ers who might actually be good so let's do all the games so let's start so the Browns that's a revenge game for the entire city of Cleveland though going into Baltimore always is yeah all right let's start with the Sunday slate let's go with Lions Eagles the Lions are officially on frisky team that I don't actually know if they're good but holy shit they'll be in every game they're undefeated which is hilarious to say because they tied the Cardinals and the

Cardinals are not good but the Lions are in week three undefeated that is crazy to think about at all and just say even if it's week one saying the Lions are undefeated feels like feels like you're saying something bad that you should get sent to your room for and it's such a perfect way to do it because you're they have a tie so they're two oh and one the Eagles on the other side are now one and two and it feels like just drop passes away from being three you know like the Eagles are the official team of they should have a better record than they are because they keep fucking up that seven drop passes

a bunch of fumbles and they pissed away that game they did they had two fumbles their return guy two fumbles remember that one play where he ran back and got his helmet ripped off yes something where you looked like an owl because his head was backwards I've never seen that about crane I've never seen a worse missed call verbal meme verbal ready yeah it's what's his name Sanders is that the guy's name sure okay so Sanders is the distracted mild Sanders mild Sanders is the distracted boyfriend and his head is turned backwards looking at mild Sanders returning kicks and then the distract then the girlfriend who's upset

is Darren Spurl's returning kicks hmm good one that's a pretty good one no it was it was um it was one of those games where I was watching it mostly on Twitter and I thought that the Eagles were losing by 30 points right how Philadelphia Twitter was reacting to everything they were down by three when I well they the Lions should have won by more Matt Patricia put this in your tickler file Matt Patricia twice now late game situations get super conservative and does the old like I'm trying that I'm trying not to lose not trying to win he did it with the Cardinals game and it felt like the same

thing this one I don't trust him with a lead I don't trust him in the fourth quarter but hey undefeated undefeated Detroit Lions you can't argue with the math on that you're almost October you are who your record says you are I vented that right now Carson Wentz he every time I saw a highlight of him he was diving head first in the end zone that's all he does like he doesn't remember the year 2017 existing it's like or the year 2018 you're tempting fate Carson when you're when you're diving head first like if you if you were to look at former Eagles that learn from their mistakes this is like Riley

Cooper when he goes to karaoke night he doesn't sing Wu Tang clan right he's not trying to make any very avoidable mistakes out there slide feet first occasionally okay every now and again the Eagles are also one of those teams that it's the Eagles and the Chargers where I don't even think you can say they're banged up because they just go into the season banged up something's wrong with their their like staff or so I don't know what it is but to say like oh well they're they're dealing with a bunch of injuries that's that's not really an excuse because that's just status quo I think the Eagles are the

most injured team every single season that gets them in the Chargers yeah basically yeah it's them if you play tight end for the Chargers or if you play like wide receiver for the Eagles you're going in with at least a mile bank right at every position the other news we had it coming from the Lions so an adjacent topic was the fact that Calvin Johnson did a whole piece where he said he's had a ton of concussions and he had to smoke weed every single Sunday after the Lions played because he was a Detroit lion that's yeah I think that's what everybody who's a Lions fan does too yeah he was just like I have to

I had to smoke so much weed to just pretend that I wasn't on the Lions for a while and I know it's gonna sound like me bashing the Lions but that is kind of what he said right yeah I mean it was pain but listen pain is both physical and mental if your brain is so dragged down to the point where the NFL is naming rules after you to say that what you did wasn't a catch then yeah you have a lot to forget about yourself right go home blaze it up absolutely go for it he's also got the new who's Isaac Bruce fingers the fingers just everywhere yeah the booger hand yeah yeah he's got fingers all the 20 dogs going this way the

other dogs going that way this guy's like hey what do you want from me it's pretty ridiculous that off the top my head I can name like five different NFL players that all have disgusting fingers yeah make me want to throw up yes Anthony Munoz yeah all gross all these are bad gross I kind of I feel like that's such an alpha move to just walk in and like shake someone's hand and have your fingers just mangled and be like yep you want no pain we have these like soft blogger hands they're just so so gross because they're moist well yeah years of just using a lot of lotion on a morsel in like and just gross so much

and then someone comes in with a finger just basically dangling on they're like yeah you guys have never worked a heart oh oh that pinky that look that pinky looks like it's been hitting the return button a lot you know what's more alpha than that is give somebody handshake and not having a pinky yes at all oh we're gonna get to that yeah you want to hop to that let's go all right let's go right to it hopping up all right we're gonna we're gonna hop ahead so last year we do a done change so this is a week that we're gonna start done chaining some teams where they're officially done they're officially crossed off they're

not going to make the playoffs they're not going to win the Super Bowl they're done last year I done chained the Houston Tech Texans after week three and oh and three start and I said if the Texans win the Super Bowl I will cut off the tip of my pinky so it's from from the nail up so I have no nail of a nub and now I got so addicted to that bet that I am going to do the same thing this year so I have a pinky team every year it's got to be a team that had playoff hopes but has stumbled out of the gate and I thought there's no better team than the team that I cannot quit so I am going to have I'm going to have to

put my pinky up so that I will stop betting on this team it's your Atlanta Falcons the Atlanta Falcons are done the Atlanta Falcons are finished if the Atlanta Falcons win the Super Bowl this year I will cut off the tip of my pinky from the nail up and what are you gonna do with your pinky with the nub after it's gone I'm gonna put I'm gonna probably tattoo the end of the nub something cool so I just like what up I like that yeah actually I'll probably tattoo the Falcons Super Bowl right how would you explain that to your child in the future to be like hey listen let me tell you a story about Matt Ryan and

Julio Jones daddy lost all sizzle baby like you cannot stop that offense unless it's in the red zone which for this game was just another perfect Atlanta Falcons game I watched it all I bet on the Falcons I cannot quit them I think they're going to be good every single week and every single week Matt Ryan didn't even play bad but he did the Matt Ryan they got to like the 28 yard line he's like hey this seems like a good time to throw a pick and throw a pick Julio Jones was living wide open in the red zone all day today and they went to him a few times they didn't do the thing where they passed the ball a

million times to Calvin Ridley I'm done with my other the other side of that coin is Jacobi Bressette had a 310 yard game he's probably the quietest if this if Jacobi Bressette played 15 years ago we would think he was an amazing quarterback like he's putting up stat lines that are he's good yes he's very very good but he's like quiet good right it's like it back when we were in college and and you could download a song in under three minutes but that that was amazing now it's like okay that's not bad but it's not good but he will he will within the next four weeks get his Jacobi Bressette like peace he'll be on

the you know like you know Sunday morning show he will have the sit-down interview Jeff Darlington will sit way too close to him in a huge facility maybe a Monday or Sunday night game where they talk about him like non-stop Jacobi Bressette will definitely become like the you know big piece of a game a nationally televised game and then you know what happens we can talk about it whether or not he's overrated and we can talk about if they're better without Andrew lock you can already do we can we we've started though that started right here's the thing by Andrew lock mr. fourth quarter yeah a lot of

spectacular comebacks Joe Kobe Bressette doesn't get his team in holes like Andrew lucky yeah yeah no but I'm saying we once Jacobi Bressette gets that spotlight that shine because it will happen then we can start saying he's actually overrated and everyone stops sucking his dick right until until the time when Bill Belichick presses the remote detonate button right that he has on every player that used to be a patriot to destroy a new locker room that he's in until that that point occurs then the Indianapolis Colts are strong contenders to not fuck up the AFC South yeah so they're good I mean Jacobi

Bressette's good the Colts are good the Falcons are an utter disappointment I will cut off tip my pinky if they win the Super 16 penalties how's that even possible I don't know 16 and Quinn you should be ashamed of yourself pick more field goals dude 16 is almost like an unrealistic amount right that's that's like what the Raiders aspire to in their heyday right that's like Al Davis is wet dream he's like I could only I could only dream of having this much dirty laundry thrown over my field done with you Falcons done Shane done with you done Shane okay so that's official and now they'll probably win every

single game what's their give me their upcoming schedule we need to talk about the entire schedule for the Falcons I'm sure they will they will definitely win at least three or four in a row and look awesome and Julio Jones Matt Ryan will do the whole thing well here's the thing they are Tennessee yeah when Houston win Arizona definitely and then Los Angeles and Seattle New Orleans well here's the thing they are definitely in the Cappard seat of the NFC South because it's gonna be them and the Saints if the Saints can continue to tread water well yeah because the NFC South is trash it's a big flaming

the worst division in football on Kyle Allen all right all right next game let's talk Jets Patriots fuck you Jared Stidham yes absolutely fucking you Jared Stidham and what we're talking about is the fact actually it's more Bill Belichick's fault because I don't when did he start taking Tom Brady out no it's like the beginning of the fourth quarter but he didn't take him out against the dolphins when they're up 50 this game was yeah I mean that's that's really what happened so the Patriots are minus 21 and the Jets the Patriots have not given up a touchdown on defense the Jets scored on a pick six which

Jared Stidham obviously gave and was it a muck pond or something yeah so Gunnar that was the only way that they were going to not cover that spread and Jared Stidham came out through the pick six I don't know why he was in the game but fuck you dude it sucked it was like when you're when you're beating somebody down mad and then you give your little brother the controller and you leave the room for a second guess play you like give me that fucking back yeah give it back to me or no celebrity shots I instead of it's it's in the Barstool headquarters we have a twitch stream that basically people play Madden all the

time and I've somehow convinced people that when I come in I get one guess play and I think I'm like 75% for throwing an interception on the guess play I am the guy I am Jared never let never let Jared sit him back right and now they've got the Patriots are gonna have to deal with Julian Edelman he's kind of fucked up yep Josh Gordon is a little bit fucked up you can have a rib jewels to Josh Gordon so fuck Hank will give you a rib Josh Gordon's man it helps me cuz you know Josh Gordon yeah I thought he for sure was gonna be out of the game he was tough as hell did you see his quotes after he was like yeah that's like he

likes playing hurt he likes playing hurt yeah I there's something to be said for that like feeling a little bit of pain feels good sometimes okay I will say though the Patriots losing or giving up that touchdown was sad because I don't know if you guys are watching the broadcast but they kept showing it's been X number of days hours and minutes since the Patriots love a touchdown and then like 20 minutes later they just added 20 minutes to the clock oh that's sucks I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry okay well let's talk about something more obviously newsworthy Patriots this last weekend and Tony O Brown yep cut by the

Patriots who so Hank what would you like to say I would like to say the Patriots made the right decision I mean climbing him no but like all that stuff that he did before was on other teams and then once they got it clear they gave him a second chance and then it was clear that was clear that once his behaviors were still happening when he was a signed member of the Patriots they cut him immediately which is all you can do okay so once you become a member of the Patriots everything your past is white clean no I mean do you guys not believe in second chances I believe in second third fifth yeah whatever yeah yeah here's

the thing I mean Antonio Brown played us all like fiddles because now what he's getting what he's like the stuff that he's getting investigated for there's been a president sent from years over the league of people playing under those same circumstances this is all like the Patriots let Antonio Brown play it's a big mess it was clear that he was doing fucking shady shit all as a member of the Patriots can't believe he did that yeah he should have destroyed his phone then it would have been fine I'm him going out to craft the vows mistake he did mr. what do you say he tweeted he said different strokes for different

folks oh I guess some people can that's can get down like that that is pretty fun that's good anyone after Shannon Sharp yeah well Shannon Sharp so she is sharp snitched on himself well yes Shannon Sharp is one of those guys like why are you talking about anyone when you have a lot of skeletons in your closet buddy but Shannon Sharp always the word Smith went with that picture where he called him clown Tony oh brown his last name rhymes with clown mm-hmm yeah I like his last name rhymes with a clown I'm gonna be honest with you I like clout clown Tony oh yeah oh yeah clown Tony oh kind of pops to me it's literally in

Tony oh clown now it rhymes clown Tony oh I thought he crushed that too he's like watch this clown Tony oh no I don't I don't mind that at all I think Antonio Brown is one of these situations where like he's been in the news and yes I was addicted to the Antonio Brown news cycle yeah do you feel a little dirty no it was been like three days since or I guess it's really only half a day since he's tweeted but any real news about Antonio Brown has been like three days ago well he quit and he didn't get fired he quit he quit he's done playing with the NFL play he's

gonna retire to start his lucrative helmet company yes I think he's gonna get back to you but I think there's actually something wrong with him yeah no I didn't I didn't want to see him play this year because I think that there's he's not well here's a darker side to all of this yes it's like feels a little I don't know what the hell is gonna happen with him especially now that he's just he's not he quit the NFL he just needs to drink more water and where magnetic sleep clothes and stop eating tomatoes all right so the beat goes on for the Patriots have not given up a touchdown like I said I think it's the

first time I read this that first time a team's ever done that the Super Bowl era where they went three games without giving up a touchdown not the era before that when I don't think they scored touchdowns were actually illegal no forward passes yeah when the Packers won all their world championships okay so Raiders Vikings yes my Dunshane by the way is the Vikings oh what done chaining him how can you don't win I'm done changing off when one cuz I got balls that's why okay cuz Kirk I'm that confident this was the ultimate Kirk Cousins game I could have told you going into it you're playing the Raiders at

home Kirk Cousins is not gonna throw an interception he's gonna throw a touchdown he's gonna look halfway decent this is the Kirk Cousins game right here well so the Vikings win the Super Bowl you'll cut your pinky no we done chain every week this is my it's fair I first done change this is a cocky done it's a very making a mockery of the dungeon I think it's actually putting the Dunshane on a pedestal on respecting the Dunshane so much so here's where I'll disagree the Kirk Cousins I agree the Kirk Cousins thinks and the goal we like we've said is for the Vikings to pay Kirk Cousins to not throw the football

mm-hmm but Dalvin Cook is a monster he's very good he is a monster cookie monster and they now have that identity where it's like we are going to run the ball and play defense and hope Kirk Cousins doesn't fuck up on the flip side on the other side the Raiders I have a question for you PFT the this game was the first day of a 48 day road trip where the Raiders will not play at home okay circus isn't they play that they play at the Colts they go to London to play the Bears they play the Packers and the Texans both on the road goddamn John Gruden in London is gonna be amazing to watch so 48 days right so

they're not gonna be home for for one two three call it a lift four four five weeks four games will Derek Carr be the starting quarterback when the Oakland Raiders play their next game in Oakland and let me ask you this I'll praise the two ways there's the he could get benched or he could get very very injured because their offensive line is still a very big problem and they can't run the ball and he's getting the shit kicked out but there's also the possibility that John Gruden leaves him over in London which I think I think he's gonna get frustrated with him by then I think that there's a very good chance because he

likes Peter man yeah John Gruden man is a really big fan of the Peter man man and I think that it's he's not he doesn't have any ties whatsoever to Derek Carr he doesn't give a shit about Derek no he definitely hates Derek Carr so I would say yes I think it's probably like a 33 40% chance that it's not Derek Carr by the time they get back because did anybody actually watch this game the vikings Raiders yes I did okay yeah I wasn't sure that they played it because it was I looked at the stat line it was just so fucking boring well and then Derek Carr did the classic drive that meant nothing at the end to make his

stats look halfway decent like if you looked at the box score I think he threw 250 yards and two touchdowns in interception uh-huh 75 yards came on that like 65 yards came on that last touchdown drive so he really threw for like 170 yards and a touchdown in intercept right the garbage time right the the Marcus Mariota it's a nice little trick where you look at it you're like Derek Carr wasn't the problem but I mean his offensive line is terrible and the defense can't stop anything and the Raiders are just not there so the worst thing that could happen to him is they have to then go play four games on the

road one of them being in London yeah who are they playing against in London they're playing the Bears the Bears in London yes I mean they play they play two very good defenses in the Bears in the Packers and they play two very good offenses in the Colts in the Texan Chacoboosh said who he said so they're gonna come back to Oakland one in six they're gonna be banged up John John Gruden might just stay in London getting into a staring contest with the bucking and palace guard just looking at each other these guys cracking me up it's it's going to be a long trip for them so I would say I'm gonna say it

Derek Carr will not be the starting quarterback for the Oakland Raiders when they play the next game in Oakland all right so who does he go with Glen and our Peterman let's let's all hope Peterman let's all together join hands and hope for Nathan Peterman yes okay a good game that we had on Sunday Raven's chiefs maybe a playoff preview did you see that tweet who tweeted that bleacher report bleacher report said it was Lamar Jackson and Patrick Holmes high-fiving after the game said see you in the AFC championship game hmm huh as I was sick to my stomach this is the kind of stuff that pisses me off it's funny well so

it was good here is that way wait I gotta I need to put myself better in a mindset of a Patriots fan so when I saw that as a diehard New England homer I was like god damn it this is more disrespect but to you it was just like hot that's cute yeah okay all right so you're tickled so I'm not offended by it anymore the music I actually think it's funny slight bemusement if a player had said that that weren't there is all aboard yeah please report just being stupid leech reports fucking clowns if you think a bleacher report is major clown Tony O Browns did you see the highlight the LSU pancake highlight

today that they like I don't know what they did to it but they made the guy look like an actual pancake yeah and they totally missed that the LSU offensive lineman had two pancakes in one play because they wanted to flex their sweet graphics designer I was pretty sweet it was a second dimension it looks very bad injury-wise to become an actual pancake he was so flat Chris Collins was getting the hard on oh yeah oh geez okay so Ravens the Ravens John Harbaugh knew this game actually we're joking about the playoff implications but he knew that like you know the Patriots have the probably the first seed it's

gonna be chiefs for Patriots first seed but the second seed in the home by is gonna be up in the air and the way he coached that game he coached it like it was a December game they went for two three times they had the Justin Tucker hilarious drop kick whatever the fuck that was that was obviously late but there was felt like a sense of urgency from the Ravens and their defense let them down and I don't know if you can even say that that's like when Patrick Mahomes only throws three touchdowns you can actually spin it so we kind of contain Patrick Mahomes but their defense got shredded I think Patrick Mahomes

only threw one touchdown over 50 yards today which is a way I'm which is a win for your defense if you can believe that how many did Mitch throw last week just curious okay why are you doing this well your team is the Redskins I have one day I have one day left before my team embarrasses me on national you should be happy looking forward to tomorrow actually like today was probably the most fun I've had watching football in the last several years because I knew that my r-words couldn't disappoint here's the thing all the people out there I see you every time I say anything about any quarterback no

matter what level of football I'm talking about you reply Mitch he's better than Mitch so I'll be like hey check out this quarterback for Coastal Carolina what an idiot like he's better than Mitch guess what the joke's been made and guess what yeah it still does hurt my feelings so so stop good job so stop doing it no but seriously like not having your team fuck up on oh yeah Sunday is wonderful oh yeah I was so free watching yes it's actually like a great week for Redskins fans because Tony Wiley quit as vice president of communications for the team so we'll probably do some fucked up and stupid

like hiring Antonio Brown to be in charge of media relations you see by the way booger our guy but booger booger needs to go to the tent because he said Bruce Allen's doing a good job with the team so we got booger and then we're gonna go into the tent get him in there fast it's tough alright so back to this game Ravens chiefs Lamar Jackson stunk to start a lecture in the fourth electric in the fourth quarter I love it because it basically satiated both sides of Lamar Jackson Twitter yeah you have enough material to work with no matter what your argument is and that's all that yeah and he's going to be dangerously

confident going into the next game because he had those two throws which were across his body straight up in the air the wounded duck said he threw that both somehow got got receptive so he's going to be very very confident and like was broken down plays and it's probably not going to work out well for him but he's still I thought he played pretty well in the second half yeah the fourth quarter he was electric I mean those when the mar runs it is shades of like early Michael Vic where there's no one else in the NFL who can do what he's doing you know what he reminds me of that movie Adam Sandler was in not

boner dogs but the one where he had the remote click click where he could he could like pause and fast forward stuff well he just ripped off saved by the bell yeah so in that saved by the bell episode if that was Lamar Jackson he would just like pause it and then are he fast forward in a second while he stood still defenders just didn't know where to go around right like they were moving while he was still he was moving while they were still it was fun to watch okay next up we have Broncos Packers the Packers jerseys are fucking disgusting I don't care if you're Packers fan you have to admit they're gross those are

gross as a team owner I think that they serve so stupid that we go down every game you're like as a fan they serve a purpose they're so fucking ugly that nobody wants to get near them and tackle they're so gross and it is really bad the all yellow helmet the piss helmet is not a good look and I think they when they give Aaron Rodgers that piss helmet they give him a larger size as a joke it's also not I'm not I'm not like the when the when the Steelers wear their bumblebees those are gross throwback jerseys should be perfect they should be immaculate they should be the jerseys everyone's like oh my god I wish they

wore these every single week and it should like mean something it should be like the the Brett Farve jerseys when they won the Super Bowl right it should be it should I don't know if they I don't know if they've updated they haven't it just when you wear your throwbacks everyone should be like these are awesome wearing bad throwbacks is completely pointless well the only part of those uniforms I like are the khaki pants so this is time so stupid alright so the other thing I wrote down Aaron Rodgers cheats he cheats he cheats his little thing he does the line of scrimmage where he always gets the guys

off sides I think it's cheating I don't think in the in the name of sportsmanship that quarterbacks should be trying to get the defense to go off sides like that well what is he doing is he clapping his hand no he's doing the hot hot yeah and then he gets a me every single time yeah he literally scored a touchdown from it Aaron Rodgers should not be allowed to do a hard count I in the spirit of the game PFT mm-hmm you're trying to you are deliberately trying to deceive your opponent do you think that that's something that we should be applauding in America I don't know I think if you're not you're not trying I'm just

saying something to think about I have a quote for you from a manual Sanders we sit at 0 and 3 living in the world of suck that sucks that that would be awful living and to be fair the Broncos do they're not even a fun 0 and 3 if you're gonna be fun at least be like spectacularly bad right they're just like we lose games 10 to 17 suck right our defense is still pretty good and Joe Flacco is barely a game manager and we suck yeah they're like they they restub their toe really bad and step on a Lego every time and and you know what's the the worst part about the Broncos John always gonna fire Vic Fangio after what

no I don't think so he's an idiot I don't think so he's an idiot John Elway John Elway's an idiot he's our smooth idiot but I don't think that he's gonna fire Vic Fangio after after one year yes Vic Fangio is the exact guy that is in no danger of having a quarterback surpass any of John Elway's records no John Elway is going to if you're a Broncos fan tweet us your real thoughts about John Elway at this point is he at the point where he has like soured your memories of John Elway this is actually John no no John like that lesson though there's a good life lesson if you're going to suck as an owner or GM do it

with a different team than you played for like Michael Jordan going in ruining the Hornets that's smart no it's hilarious right it's funny like Derek Jeter ruining the Marlins that's funny that's that's something totally different if you ruin the team you played for your fan base eventually is gonna be like hey it was awesome you were awesome you won two Super Bowls but dude you stink John Elway is the kind of guy that he will be totally happy having a coach that is is just bad enough from to put all the blame in the world on and keep he's gonna keep them in quarterback hell for a while I just

want to hear from Broncos fans I want to hear where you're at on the like John Elway we need you need to go away so the Broncos and I know they won the Super Bowl but that was Peyton Manning kind of falling in their lap and they have not been able to find a quarterback they had a really good defense too they traded for Joe Flacco he's gonna he's gonna fire Vic Fangio I don't know he's gonna do it he's an idiot he's gonna do it John Elway is gonna spend the entire offseason looking for the next Joe Flacco right so think about who the next Joe Flacco like an old quarterback that used to be he's probably gonna trade for

Eli let's be honest he's probably gonna get Eli in there probably gonna get big Ben in there try to get that entire class of quarterbacks he's like these guys won Super Bowl one of these again yeah one of these four guys can do it yeah Matt Schaub yes maybe the back up for all three of them absolutely like John John Elway he's I don't think he's gonna drive the franchise into the ground but he's gonna make him very extremely eight and eight over the course of the next 40 years that is driving the Broncos in the ground because the Broncos sneaky are one of the most successful franchises in NFL history like they go

years they went years without having back-to-back bad seasons they don't I think they're one of like three or four teams that has never had a first pick in the draft John Elway is already doing like the Broncos actually meant something the Broncos were consistently good year and year out they're kind of like the Steelers in that respect where they may dip but they don't dip hard and they're dipping hard right yeah so I'm just saying I'm asking for the feedback from Broncos fans okay yeah Broncos I will say though when Drew Locke comes back he's probably gonna get in for Joe Flacco I would hope so you gotta at least

give them something to roof you as as an executive who is not very good at his job John Elway can only say with a straight face that Joe Flacco is our future so many weeks and win them without a win I think after like six or seven weeks he'll be like you know what Drew's healthy we're gonna run the kid out there see what he does then they're gonna fuck him up and then Eli's gonna come in next year yeah I'm holding on hope because the the Packers offense still doesn't look like it works fully so I'm holding on hope but their defense it's bullshit they're winning with defense it's that's another thing they're

cheating with their defectors shouldn't be able to win with with the defense their defense is really really good both Danny Vitale had a great game too you get you get you get two Hall of Fame quarterbacks back-to-back in like a 30 year span so you never have to have bad quarterback play you shouldn't get to win with your defense that's that's cheating a cheating the Packers are going along with the hard count yes to go along with the fact that it's cold there in the playoffs right yes all these things yes dolphins cowboys yes oh wait before we do that the Packers are playing on Thursday night football

against the Eagles that's gonna be a great game in Lambo and it's gonna be on Amazon so if you are an Amazon Prime member did you know that they have Thursday night football that's right Thursday night football has returned to Prime video for a third season the cool thing is you can catch all the action on your TV on the web or on your mobile anywhere in the world and the experience is next level with Prime videos x-ray feature you can access next-gen stats play history and team information and now it's available on iOS Android fire tablets and fire TV and if you're ready to hear a new take on the

game you can switch over to sport broadcast legends Hannah Storm and Andrea Kramer for the play-by-play so you don't have cable or simply want to experience the future of football tune in this Thursday coverage begins at 7 p.m. Eastern and kicks off at 8 20 p.m. Eastern also available on the Fox and NFL Network NFL Network simulcast subject to change Thursday night football is presented by Bud Light Platinum and you can watch it on Amazon Prime watch the Packers cheat on Thursday night against the Eagles Amazon Prime and it's presented by Bud Light Platinum dolphins cowboys yes I got a new thing we got to

do say something nice about the dolphins every single week we're gonna say one nice thing about the dolphins I have something they held the cowboys to 10 points in the first half that's pretty nice that was nice they are adapting to their quarterback who has a problem with authority by giving him a head coach that commands none of it there we go their color rush uniforms were looking good candy ass no they look good they were kind of candy ass they don't they don't become candy ass until they have to be in cold weather it's funny because they actually look more candy ass when they're not covering the ass with a candy

color right it's just the top but but but it was more candy but they did the color rush and it was in Dallas so it didn't look candy ass it's candy ass when they wear those those teals in our aqua yeah in Buffalo in the snow in the then it's candy then it looks like they didn't want to get off the bus right it looks it looks really bad Josh Rosen stat line no not really 200 yards 200 yards but he did go 18 for 39 but still that's that's much better the taco Charlton revenge game yes he had a sack yes good job taco there we go Sunday let's see anything else well no that's they're not gonna win seven games

are you ready to admit that I may have jumped the gun on that listen I need to come to reckoning with a take and I think it's time to just accept it rather than keep fighting against it the dolphins will probably only win six and I admit I was wrong I'll be the bigger man in this situation seven games was a lot and the AFC East is wide open who do the dolphins have on their schedule because I will they have like a 30 point spread doesn't matter who they have on their schedule well I don't know it really doesn't matter I probably don't you're probably right yeah they might have a 30 point spread at some

point this season because they just that was a 22 point spread in the Cowboys covered it and the dolphins actually played I mean it weren't you know they're terrible terrible they were better than the first two weeks they got rid of Minka Fitzpatrick who instantly made an impact for the Steelers like I'm talking huge impact on defense for them I wish they played like the Chiefs or something in Herohead that would have a 30 point spread no yeah at least yeah okay so the Cowboys are very good I don't know how good because it feels like so they played that they beat the Giants who they beat last week last week

the Cowboys beat I don't know oh the the Redskins that's right the Giants the Redskins and the Dolphins I not exactly sunshine yeah myself on that one not exactly murderers row there of teams next week they're playing in the Dome against New Orleans I'm excited for that one but Dallas I think is very very good Kellan Moore is going to be the hot new name yeah Kellan Moore is already like it's very clear that Jason Garrett needs to start looking for houses in different cities or at least just I don't know like maybe put some vizine in in in Kellan Moore's water bottle before a game get him out of there so you

can win a game easily with yourself because Kellan Moore like they're doing crazy things like having Dak you know play action and and having a nice like run past balance and not running an eight man box it's like novel concepts that the Cowboys weren't able to grasp Kellan Moore has and now they look like a next level offense no it's kind of crazy so I want to put this out there in the tickler file for you Mike Gundy who taking an NFL job next year Kellan Moore head coach Oklahoma State Cowboys hmm I don't think Mike Gundy's ever leaving he's one of those lifers no to now that T boons gone no got nothing

holding he's probably in T boons will he needs to fly like a free bird that mullet it's probably T boons will was like here's like ten million dollars every year that Mike Gundy stays yeah I don't know I don't know man I think I think there's a good chance that Mike Gundy is gonna go to like maybe the making this up yet maybe yeah maybe Carolina this is just totally made up I think that I think that Gundy's wanted to go to the NFL for a while what yeah based on what I'm based on rumors and shit in the past from who I'm not gonna give my sources up on these rumors I think Mike Gundy is not gonna be a

college lifer well okay so now we're making a bet that like you can go for like the next 30 years just putting that in the definitive time I said it was the tickler give us a definitive time I think that there's a lot of weird shit that's gonna be going on in Oklahoma at Oklahoma State they're gonna have to figure out who's being the behind the scenes warlord that's calling all the shots and still water and then and that this would be an exit time for Gundy if there ever was one he the problem is Lincoln Riley is gonna he is the hot name in the Big 12 so he's gonna hop Mike you know he's already hopped my

doesn't want to compete against Lincoln Riley no no no Riley's gonna go to the NFL no no no Lincoln Riley staying in Oklahoma you're getting this all wrong Mike Gundy is going to Houston got it the Texans yes okay or the Vikings or the Panthers or the or the Cowboys any one of these teams have a current opening yes we haven't done enough to Oklahoma State when Hank falsely tweeted that their star wide receiver was out for the season last year James Conner yeah he's watching watching doesn't two or three years but to be fair there was a material change so at the time he was out for the season then he

got an MRI and he did go to the doctor's office he did he what's up with Leroy's Jill and Ramsey the chiefs it still could happen right but that was very premature it still could happen listen Leroy's bad about 500 which isn't bad for a blind dog but you like have people believing shit now well that's that's their fault it's dangerous I can't control what they believe it's very dangerous Leroy's a very good boy and he's got about 50% of his scoops right very own the Antonio excuse me clown Tony O Brown Tony O Brown yeah alright Bengals bills I don't know what to make of the Bengals defense because it's

schizophrenic it looked terrible last week and then it looked actually good this week and kept them in the game Josh Allen's legit and Frank Gore he's 36 years old he's never gonna stop I don't understand how running backs shouldn't be playing at 30 he Frank Gore this would be a take Frank Gore at his age is more impressive than Tom Brady at his age oh wow 36 years old you can't that's quite it shouldn't be running for five yards a carry the NFL 36 years old to be fair that's not Frank or style like this was a flashy game for Frank I know Frank or is used to getting 3.1 yards a carry and probably still could be doing

that when he's 45 50 years old it's crazy though it is nuts so good for Frank Gore Josh Allen I think is the new Cam Newton as we've been calling him he is I think now on the Mount Rushmore Bill's quarterbacks already Jim Kelly Kyle Orton mm-hmm Kyle bowler Kyle bowler and Andy Dalton T-Mobile and Andy Dalton T-Mobile Andy got him into the playoffs a couple years ago and he's doing the same again this year so it's not out Andy Dalton those are making the playoffs by the way dude I'm gonna say it bills are winning 10 games the bills here you got you're on a take you're a take machine right now to disagree I'd have to see

them I want to see them next week against the because similar to the Cowboys they played the Jets the Giants mm-hmm and the Bengals so you have one in one and eight so he's beat him he's beating the entire I love the bills I think they're deep of Ohio their defense Fox their defense is awesome yeah I don't I think it's gonna be hard to make the playoffs in the AFC because they're although there's teams that are falling off I mean the Steelers sucking helps yeah and the Chargers not being able to get out of their own way but like think about it the Colts the Colts the Texans the Jaguars the Ravens the Browns mm-hmm

should I keep going no I still think the bills are in there okay and no they'll be in the mix but I'm putting Buffalo not on the hot seat but I'm saying the spotlight is on the city of Buffalo this week because the Patriots have come to town on Sunday so sell all the dildos all the folding tables I'm gonna move to Buffalo during the week and open up a dildo and folding table store and retire a billionaire because that crowd is gonna be in Saint was it new era field yeah the new era is gonna just be filled with drunk more lovable moron I'm actually I'm looking at their schedule right now I can get on the 10-win game

bandwagon this is this is senior prom for Buffalo this weekend two more against the Dolphins yeah boom boom well one or two that's five right it's Patrick revenge yeah no but I'll get on that I'll get on board with that this this game next week 3 and O vs 3 and L if the bills win this game I would guess it's the biggest win in bills since I don't know like 20 years 25 years I mean it's the biggest win in because they didn't win the playoff game that they were in almost beating the Jaguars yeah but this no this would probably be the biggest game the biggest win they've had in like two decades yeah it's gonna be big for

sure here's what's gonna happen it's a Sunday night please yeah Monday night or Sunday afternoon yeah it's Sunday at one o'clock give us just madness too early I need I need the fans in Buffalo to have a good solid 12 to 15 hours of pre-gaming before this one I love Buffalo too because like the cold weather cities when you have these hot games in September you just look at the crowd and everyone is violently sunburnt because they just can't they should not be in the sun that long right they all by halftime they're there's sun poisoning in half the stadium they look like Mike Shanahan and Tom Coughlin yeah sweating

way too much yeah here's what I'm not looking forward to if they do lose for the pay to the Patriots and it's a good chance that they do because this is what the New England Patriots do is they break people's hearts there the word fraud is gonna get tossed around and I'm pretty I'm preemptively disavowing the fraud I agree they're not frauds yeah I like I think the bills make the playoffs too I'll do it okay I worry in where it's the reverse done Shane Hank is just smiling at us looking like we're idiots fine Hank you don't like Josh Allen I love Josh Allen hmm I love Bill's mafia should we go down the list of friends of

the program and then you could say who you think is good and who's not yeah let's do it okay Jared Gough love him can't get enough Blake Portals love him Jim Harbaugh death Mitch Trabesky love him Patrick Mahomes love him you love him yeah okay who don't you love I love everyone I'm a loving guy hmm I doesn't sound like the way that you were talking much hate there's too much hate in this world the way you were talking before we started recording was interesting hmm I don't know what you're talking about hmm Panthers Cardinals Kyle Allen are we gonna do this I think we need to establish we need to

establish some sort of rating for quarterbacks that you think are gonna suck that don't suck as bad as you think they're gonna suck yeah so it's like the moxie meter maybe you have to use the word moxie maybe it's the the the case the case meter because remember that case Kenan game when John Gruden was like audibly orgasming Monday night football yeah like this guy's a ninja man what about the case momator the case momator the guy who you think is going to suck who actually comes in and does well and doesn't suck as bad as you think he's gonna suck yes I think he's at like what was the name of that

on a scale of Dalton's because if you think about it going back to Andy when he was a second-round pick I think right our third-rounder yes to Cincinnati you thought he was gonna suck when you get he had all the intangibles of sucking right went to like a smaller school had the red hair that's basically it but everyone thought he was gonna suck and then he got in we're like wow this guy isn't that bad cuz he has AJ Green yeah so it's on the case case momator each degree should be measured in Dalton's yeah I like that so I think Kyle Allen gets on a scale of ten Dalton's he gets a six in terms of his moxie okay six in

terms of my I gotta find this Rams quarterback because it's all I mean case Keenum obviously played for the Rams well he's like he's a quarterback Austin Davis okay Austin Davis yeah everyone's like Austin Davis and he wasn't that bad yeah he was bad but he wasn't that bad here's how you can tell if you have a quarterback that has moxie you would never say that a really good quarterback has moxie for example when Peyton Manning played in his rookie year you would never be like wow look at that guy's moxie through the most right interceptions right ever well you would never look at Tom Brady and say

Tom Brady plays with a lot of moxie he's above moxie right if you have moxie it means I can see you potentially getting to and losing a wildcard game well if you have moxie you suck but just like you're too dumb to realize you suck yeah which makes you good you're surprising us all that you're actually good right because you look kind of like a doofus you don't realize that you're actually not that talented yes so by sheer like stupidity you become talented so what we're saying is Kyle Allen kind of us Kyle Allen we actually are a moxie podcast yeah we were too dumb to realize we shouldn't be doing yeah I'm

definitely pretty high on the Dalton scale in terms of like a guy that looks like a huge idiot that sometimes will say something that's not a total right moronic they say and then other times I'll say things like the Buffalo Bills are gonna win the Super Bowl ten wins ten wins no that actually was it okay the dolphins winning seven or Mike Gandhi is gonna be the coach of the Kaleida Panthers you're throwing that out boy will I have a good laugh 30 years okay so with all that said about Kyle Allen four touchdowns QB controversy I think you got to see well I'm gonna wait to see what cams Instagram captures did cam

wear an outfit I don't even go he definitely got a fit off Ryan I almost said Ryan Rivera Ron Rivera was so mad at his press conference when people kept on asking about cam that he left like the press conference area and then tried to walk out and then just kept on talking because you know those the press conference rooms are surprisingly tiny so it's always so funny when a coach likes like this this is over and then he's standing in the corner it's he's still very very close to everyone being like I'm done talking about cam let's talk about the game I think they actually have to like Cam Newton as

currently stated is broken we watch that Thursday night game he can't hit open receivers he misses all types of throws Kyle Allen actually shows hey like Greg Olsen looks awesome today Kyle Allen was hitting open receivers he was throwing the ball and now it is the Cardinals but unless cam Newton is a hundred percent I think it's Kyle Allen's job yeah no you have to keep until cam Newton's foot or his shoulder shoulder or his ankle or his heart or his soul or whatever it is about cam Newton till he's fully healthy I agree it's it's Kyle Allen so and then the on the other side of the ball or the other side of the sideline Kyle Murray

that sucks man that offensive line is so bad yeah there we were talking about it in the first half he had 18 completions for 95 yards yeah that's a pretty good sign that you can't get anyone open past 10 yards because the because you're running for your life on every point even his passes are short that's what they say about him he's he he falls directly into the same category that Josh Rosen fell into last year which is you can't judge him because he's on the card right and you can never say if somebody's good or not if they play in Arizona I'm gonna say something nice about Kyler Murray this was the first week that I didn't

think he was shorter than the week before okay all right that's a consistent with his height from last we're maintaining still short yeah we're maintaining but I did think I was like he got shorter he didn't look any shorter right which is which is strong just wear taller cleats Kyle yeah out there one Tyler it's it's actually funny because his name is Kyle and the other guy's name is Kyler and it's like this guy's more Kyle than your yeah but then I think now we got to give Kyler to Allen Kyler prove that he's more Kyle than Kyler so yeah I definitely would have more belief in Kyler Allen Kyler

Allen yeah and until another Kyle comes in and takes that are away from him right he gets to hold the title right okay so speaking of quarterbacks that are just dumb enough to not realize that they shouldn't be that good Daniel Jones electric Daniel Jones was electric and I really do think because the Giants offensive line is that bad but it takes a certain there's like two pasts that rookie quarterbacks go when their offensive line is terrible one is they turtle and they're like this sucks the NFL sucks this is nowhere near what it was like in college where I could just hit wide open receivers the other side

is Daniel Jones where he's too dumb to realize how bad his offensive line is he's just out there making plays yeah like just making plays to the difference between Daniel Jones and Eli Manning was so fucking apparent when Daniel Jones scored two touchdowns running the ball including the fourth down game winning touchdown where I think Eli Manning would still be on the field trying to get his body moving forward to make that run yeah Daniel Jones doesn't take a self sack like Eli does Daniel Jones he looks it's like the difference between an alive person and a dead person it was remarkable it is crazy to seeing

somebody that looks kind of like Eli Manning wearing that uniform that's able to run without falling down it's it's fascinating he played really well he didn't have seguan which probably makes us even more yeah more impressive here's a fun little stat he's one and oh when trailing by 18 or more Eli Manning is 0 and 44 in games really by a safer metrics does it if you're a Giants fan aren't you mad that you started the season without Daniel Jones because the Giants aren't gonna go to the playoffs but you gave away to you literally just gave away two games starting Eli Manning at the beginning of the season and then

you watched him Daniel Jones go around and make plays and and have this you know crazy comeback in the second half he looks good I think Daniel Jones pops harder because you got to see Eli just last week I also want to give all Giants fans because this is gonna be something that everyone's gonna throw out there all the Giants fans reacting to Jen Daniel Jones on draft night and saying it was the worst pick ever I'm gonna say as part of my take as a podcast we get to decide we're like the president we're the presidents of sports I'm gonna give us that title you should never Zara I'd rather be those

ours are sports are yeah yeah that's pretty cool that's pretty cool um you if you overreact to your team's draft pick you get a pardon no matter what draft night is all about overreaction okay so like Eagles fans we forgive you for booing Donovan yeah no but I'm serious like when you should have booed him harder you don't know how bad he was when your team when you're when your team makes a draft pick those 24 hours you should be allowed to either be because none of us know how these guys are gonna turn out so no matter if you're happy if you're sad both reactions are ridiculous knowing that you don't know so I'm

saying Giants fans you get a pardon in my eyes to like if you had a bad take about Daniel Jones as long as you've moved off that take after you watch a game like today you are completely absolved of all bad takes on draft night the best part about draft night is you were unable to have those players jerseys to burn at that time right because if you did there would have been a shitload of Giants fans burning a Daniel Jones jersey that doesn't even exist right and you can't take that back once you burn the jersey well yeah that's final no you can you can buy it and then and then do the the fake lighter

and then the sorry Daniel Jones with the post it now I thought you're gonna say matters neither created nor destroyed he just becomes smoke yes and he becomes a part of you yeah but yeah Daniel Jones looked really good he looks like in a live version of Eli Manning Bruce Arians fucked up big time at the end with this kicker he let there's something about Tampa Bay that stadium and the kickers they've had that you can just close your eyes and just see missed missed field goals I think it's like the heat yeah the turf always feels wet anytime you're kicking footballs at a pirate ship right you can never really

be a hundred percent certain with your accuracy it's like is this a football field the games are always in the afternoons on Sunday so they play the late games and I feel like that's missed field goal city you know like there's always more saber metrics we've actually advanced stats of part of my take there's more missed field goals between 6 and 7 p.m. then there are between 3 and 4 p.m. that's true that's a fact that's a fact and it's a fact it's also in Tampa Arizona it's in Tampa in Tampa it's it's what you the game started at 430 yeah it's an elderly crowd they're cranky because they're already late for

dinner when you kick off they just want to get the hell out of there yeah Bruce Arians took a five-yard delay game penalty to back the kicker up then James went back even a couple extra yards yeah that's that was a different that was the difference in the game was James going right in between that the hash marks to take a knee backed it up about a yard and a half and if it was that yard closer so we can blame this on James Winston we do have a reason to blame it not just on Bruce Arians doing like the Matthew McConaughey sometimes you gotta go back to move forward also James I don't appreciate the fact that

you actually looked good for a while on Sunday throwing it all over the place to Mike Evans I like my James throwing hilarious interceptions and we can all make jokes yeah that's don't do that don't steal that from us yeah I'm blaming the the Giants secondary for covering Mike Evans with Genoese Jenkins yes I in like man-to-man coverage when when I think Mike Evans on the game winning drive like Evans is seven inches taller than that's sanity listen as a short guy it doesn't matter how how hard you try to jump if you're going up against a guy that's like six four on a rebound you're just not you're never

gonna get the ball yeah you need some help which I actually know that I think about I never really understood trying to double cover a guy that's a lot taller than you by putting a second short guy on him really address the problem you just get him it's like when you when you have like two kids trying to sneak into the movie theory put on a big a big coat and have them go on each other's you know shoulders okay that's what you're trying you put a trench coat on yes and then you stack them and then they can get into another movie yeah speaking of defense PFT simply safe has your defense for your home you like how

you like that guys that's pretty good right okay on average a burglary happens once every 23 seconds in the US that's according to the FBI if you have Janors Jenkins guarding your home it happens every 10 seconds approximately 2 million burglars are reported a year in the US census 83% of burglars admitted that they specifically look to see if there's an alarm 20 out of every 100 or sorry 1000 households were burglarized in 2017 and what's crazy is it only one in five homes have home security maybe because most companies really don't make it that easy but simply safe is super easy to install it's no hassle it's not

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alarm and the call goes to the bottom of the list but not with simply safe using their video verification technology they're able to visually confirm that the break-in is happening allowing police to get the scene 3.5 times faster than other home security companies and for my listeners simply safe has a huge deal going on right now go to simply safe comm slash PMT and get free shipping in a money back guarantee that's simply safe comm slash PMT today simply safe comm slash PMT Texan's Chargers yes I know we make this joke every Sunday but the reason we do it is because it happens every single Sunday we have watched the

same Chargers game for the last 15 years Philip Rivers trying to come back at the end of a game running backwards slinging the ball downfield getting frustrated doing the what that face the gracious to Petrus face looking up and doing that face it is the most calm it's like you're it's like your mom cooking your favorite meal every Sunday you know that Sunday is about to end when Philip Rivers is running for his life down a score on the West Coast I'm gonna miss it I'm gonna miss it when he's gone let's just embrace it we have we have it's gonna keep happening listen the Chargers this is no strange territory for

them they start every season like one and two yes one and three in games they should win games they should win and then they come back and they end up with eight or nine wins and then everyone says oh the Chargers are a much better team they're frisky they're much better team than their record says and then they get into the playoffs and they immediately revert to week one charge right because it's the start of a new season so they have to go back and lose some winnable games the only thing you forgot is everyone gets injured to everyone also gets injured but fortunately Melvin Gordon can't get

injured when he's not playing yeah give us an update so he's gonna he's gonna be fresh so right now the Chargers have collected $600,000 from Melvin Ingram and Melvin Gordon oh excuse me Melvin Gordon and they've paid Austin Echler I believe a hundred and ten thousand dollars so the Chargers are if I if the Chargers were a stonk I'm buying stocks oh yeah right now like through the roof this really is though this was such a Chargers game up early they look like their their offense is humming they have one bad quarter where it feels like the whole team went to sleep and then boom you you snap your fingers and Phil

Rivers is doing the Phil Rivers it's it's like going to your favorite bar every like you go to your favorite bar you just know that they're not gonna change the menu the the beer is always gonna be the same the drunk guy at the end of the bar is always gonna be there that's the Chargers on Sunday you get to you there's something comforting knowing that you will get the same thing every Sunday when the Chargers play in the afternoon time slot it's great it's absolutely great and I'm gonna miss it on the other side of the ball the Houston Texans does anybody actually know what Bill O'Brien does mmm was he do does he

does he actually try to get the Sean Watson killed does he coach yes when I watch him on the sidelines he's always he's got his play card in front of his mouth and he looks angrier the more they're winning I've noticed and then when they're losing he's got the smirk on his face like I can't believe they're beating me Bill O'Brien hello Brian head coach Bill O'Brien this guy in a football game yeah I don't know what he does I really don't understand he's a full-time GM he's probably making for like front office decisions about the cost of popcorn he's our which which future second-round pick he's gonna trade away

next right I don't know what he does during a game he doesn't seem like he's a strategy guy I'll tell you what he does he's going to coach the Texans for another like eight or nine years and then he's gonna get fired and everyone's say yeah that that yeah that probably makes sense and then they'll be the stats like Bill O'Brien won 90 games with the Texans like what he did oh that's pretty cool he is not a good coach but at the same time like is gonna keep winning and the Texans have this actually until Mike bank or until Mike Gundy takes his bike honey this was a very impressive Texans win and I now I'm

not believing in the Chargers anymore I almost done chained him no don't you don't want to do that I'm so sick of the Chargers like the hype Chargers and I was the leader of it two years ago I'm done believing it because I just feel like I'm getting fooled I might start believing in the Texans I might start believing in the Texans I think that's a bad idea I don't know you can't go from a pinky bet where you're gonna circumcise but they won this game being the biggest cheerleader for a team dude I'm not gonna be the biggest cheerleader fair weather fan everybody hates that guy I'm not gonna be a cheerleader for the

Texans I'm saying how many teams are you gonna score scoring 20 on answers second half points on the road the guy I'm actually gonna start believing that the Texans might be semi for real I think the tech yeah the Texas again that's as far as I'll go they're semi for real it's like they're the division that they're in could be anybody's game I don't think it's gonna be the Titans until they make the move to Tana Hill I don't think that it's gonna be Gardner Menchew Gardner Gardner Menchew jury's still out on him by the way I feel bad for Baker cuz he kind of got swagger jacked by the whole Gardner Menchew

big time like Gardner is is Baker if you put Baker in like a pot and then boiled him for a while and then let all the oh this is condensation going Hank what we started talking Gardner just start going with just crazy descriptions no I'm just he's Gardner help yourself evaporated you so we Gardner's name comes up and now we're boiling Baker Mayfield put him in my freezer Gardner Mayfield makes me want to skin a larger woman and wear it he's and show everyone my manjaina yeah maybe it makes me want to and collect some butterflies he's he's condensed Baker is all that I'm saying he's the pure

essence of Baker Mayfield if I were to take Baker Mayfield and put him in a cauldron in my basement and turn him into a Baker's brew turn him into a cologne yes mixed with the eye of Newt and then bathe in him every day that's Gardner and then make a lamp out of his mustache yes that's Gardner that's what Gardner so I'd be pretty upset like Daniel Jones if I were to compare him to Gardner I would say that he's like the he's the antithesis he's the Gardner he's the vaccine to Gardner what is the what's the opposite of a Gardner a bulldozer a forest fire like somebody that takes care of a garden dude I've

lost you so long ago what's the opposite of somebody Hankle though oh a literal garden yes yeah a cement layer yeah a pavor a hungry rabbit a pavor a hungry rabbit digging up the carrots that's what Daniel Jones is okay my Gardner talk okay but congratulations welcome board to the Texas bandwagon not I said I said the farthest the the fact that I've gone to the lengths of saying they might be semi for real is the nicest thing I've ever said about the Texans that's all you're getting Texans Steelers 49ers the Niners actually dominated this game but turned the ball over a million times it was

five but it was still it felt like a million times they were just every time they should have been up like two three scores in the first half and I don't know the Steelers just stink Kyle Shanahan was running out of running backs to bench he was like every fucking run he would put in he would put in somebody after one of the dudes was fumble and then that guy would fumble and be like fuck I have to go back to the first guy again this was all sweet justification by the way for Kyle Shanahan not running the ball in the Super Bowl that's what happens when you give the ball to running back they just drop it but then

when they threw it she would drop off through two picks but one and a half don't do anything one and one and half of those passes weren't his fault yes don't do anything so the 49ers we yeah we're still not good not sure if they're good yet are they good this week are they are are they good team of the week they might be read off their entire schedule breaking news Pittsburgh Pittsburgh tweeted this was their goodbye tweet on the night we're going back to Pittsburgh dude that was their post game tweet that's like did you guys see San Jose State beat Arkansas in Arkansas and Arkansas's official Twitter

account just wrote they were down I think 17 and a half time Arkansas's Twitter account just said half time in Fayetteville no score no score it's a common occurrence I some of them in monitoring I think teams are now required to tweet like after the first quarter after the first half at the end of the games and when their team's getting smoked they just they don't either don't tweet the score it's very funny to eat something yes very like this is the score how many people in Arkansas even have Twitter don't don't reply if you actually live in Arkansas oh no chase yeah yeah try your guy who tried to burn me on

Twitter buddy chase names Arkansas to Arkansas is a state that should stick to message boards yes your state Constitution is written on Hogville net yeah like this is not it's not a state for Twitter accounts Pittsburgh I don't know what Pittsburgh was doing they're just like hey we're going back to Pittsburgh that's all we have to say it was that's that's the most exciting thing I guess that they could have tweeted today because Mason Rudolph has zero moxie yes no Dalton's I award sir sir I award you negative one Dalton on the day dude Mason Rudolph big time dumb face circle that okay dumb face

quarterback I took one look at him all the scouting I needed to do just his face is too big and it's dumb so we did learn some lessons from big Ben yeah you can't you have right exactly you can't you can't win with that face no offense seem like a nice guy bad when with that face bad winning face no you know you know that I do know that face what are skull measurements he's probably like a size eight and three quarters Jesus Christ that's yeah yeah by the way we didn't work at turns we just went right over this kid on Twitter named Chase tried to roast me and I just roasted him back his name's chase and we we

realized that if your name is chase what do you say to you he said my my mom was a must know what do you say did my mom was desperation because I said Freddy kitchens was just desperate on his last calls and I said we shouldn't talk about our mother's decision-making when your name is chase and we realized that chase we listed the things that chases can do it's essentially SEC quarterback in NASCAR driver mm-hmm that's it that's it that's it could you imagine walking yeah but could you imagine being like here's my doctor his name is chase fishing commentator yeah yeah he could be a production he could be a big no he could

be a big mouth bass like competitor he could be a competitor turned analysts yes yeah production assistant for Bill Danza's cooking challenge yeah the fishing thing oh yeah that's true there are millennial chases you're right so it's essentially if you're 25 to 40 and your name is chase I don't know what line of profession you're in just change your name sorry sorry yeah sorry sorry tell us all the chases we're not trying to bash you but tell us what you do so we can change the perception of chase I feel like chase could be a guy that is starting to get an airbrush and company off the ground but like so so like if

you're if you're trying like if you go into try to maybe like a financial advisor like you'd want to talk about you know how to how to plan for the future guys like more than chase that's true that's a bank but if you guys like hey what's up guys I'm Chase Chevy Chase I'm walking out yeah now I'm not I'm not shaking a person's hand named chase and I'm not saying this to disparage any chases because I'll I'll tap up a chase oh I'll pound the rock on bro all day long me and Chase will do the head nod yeah like I'll have a special little like slappy thing that I do with Chase yeah but I'm not doing a hand shaking his hand

of a chase hello it's never been done chase good to see you again let's conduct business yeah hi chase good to see you yeah chase doesn't close many deals yeah no that's not you know chase no yeah okay sorry there's gonna be so many chases that won't wake up and listen to this but what the fuck did I do to these chase on your way into your job as a guy that refinishes pool tables I apologize if you're having to listen I know it's an early morning for you tomorrow you're doing fine it'll everything will be good chase listen man at the at the pit my ride auto shop you work at we're not trying to I'm sure

you don't talk shit about auto workers I know I'm not it's not it's custom okay not the regular like I need my car fix I'm talking the custom rims that's a chase job auto detailing yes but only from the hours of 8 to 10 because from 10 to 7 he's gonna smoke a lot of we you gotta get fucking high just chill out okay oh man cause the state is rig yeah no he does he does cuz it's better he actually put money into it he's got him he's got a monogram invested in his ring he's got a monogram vape rig but it doesn't have his last name on it it's just a giant C he's like he's he's definitely had the conversation like

yo once I get my paycheck next month I'm gonna really upgrade my rig yeah now I'm what's the trim on it like yo that you like my rig now wait do you see the finished product when I actually have a little cash to put in got a few extra hours this week yeah chase has nine different Calvin pissing bumper stickers on the back of his car oh truck nuts for sure all of competing brands of truck against his preferred brand of truck that he doesn't own oh fuck you know he owns a Toyota and then has like a made in America bumper sticker yeah no he's driving in like a 1996 Tacoma yeah but it's got the manual transmission so it's

got a little bit more pick me up off road dude yes he's got the Tacoma but then he's got nine Calvin pissing on Chevy bumper stickers he's like yeah I'm gonna get a Ford oh shit alright sorry Chase fuck I mean there are some chases that we really just roasted those part of my chase yeah part of my chase okay chase Daniel chase Daniel good guy but he's an STC quarterback and there you go definitely drives a Tacoma yes okay last game mudflaps on the single tires they're like very small tires with huge mudflaps with the naked women laying down on their sides on them yeah ask ask grass or what is it ask gas or grass

no one rides for free but he's on Chase's bike he's only he's only he's never gotten ass or grass for it I'll put you that way yeah alright last game St. Seahawks this is why you pay a backup quarterback this is why you pay a backup quarterback Teddy Teddy two gloves Teddy big dick now he got he got spotted 14 points on a fumble recovery in a proper turn but he played nice on the road in Seattle and the Saints are gonna be kept afloat in a division that is very winnable considering who else is in it so credit to the Saints for actually having like some foresight like hey maybe we should have a legit

backup for this guy not dumb face Mason Rudolph yeah also Seattle what the hell were you doing not pumping in more crowd music like this is the one time that you get to play a team the Saints that the NFL will absolutely not penalize the other way against yeah you should have been playing crowd noise at an insane volume today I know it's they always say it's loud up there you people forget they designed the stadium to trap the noise inside of it this was the game where you should have cheated more Pete Carroll got drilled in the face with a football it's either that he got I have my suspicions because he competes

in a division against some very hot coaches I think one of them was like this guy's got the DILF thing going on rugged look I need to marsha marsha marsha him and hit him in the face with a football and break his nose right uh chopping so hard in the first quarter on his gum I knew they were in trouble just you really can like if you if you are a sharp better in Vegas you can make a model based on how hard Pete Carroll is chopping his gum and then just fade the Seahawks if he's going crazy on that thing it's probably he's probably on Adderall I mean considering their history yeah the Seattle

pharmacy yes what we call him yeah it's also possible he broke his nose by chewing his gum too hard yeah I could I wouldn't look at that pencil Pete every time he chomped there's like a little blood squirted out yeah that'd be nice yeah yeah I have a little fun stat here you ready yes give it to me from a friend of the program Danny Kelly he said every bird team lost this week whoa are he listed a bunch of bird teams and I think it's every bird team lost this week so birds are on the hot seat there's an article should we princess it real quick Cardinals lost Ravens lost Eagles Eagles lost Seahawks Seahawks lost Falcons

Falcons are done any other bird teams that we missed Jets it's a big bird flew into it yeah hey is that you I think that's it I think I don't know the bird teams no way I thought it was you I also loved how the Saints I thought the biggest question going into this game was will the Saints be able to like run the ball Alvin Camara be able to do his thing without the threat of Drew Brees being able to you know stretch the field and Alvin Camara they just wrote him and he was awesome he'd like 150 yards rushing in receiving in two touchdowns I'm mad at the Seahawks I'm big mad at the Seahawks why because

every time I see the defense I just think that it's 2014 and I'm like that defense is awesome and then when they're not awesome I feel like I feel like I'm wrong and that can't be yeah I can't be wrong in all this Seahawks also one of very few teams the NFL where their road jerseys might be better than their home jerseys I know the black at home is cool but I something about the white in the gold it just looks I don't know it looks cool it's a cool look you know what it is when you see that like a little tiny tiny bit of neon green on the on that home jersey you want more of it wait on what the Seahawks no no I'm

talking about Saints oh I said my bad my bad I meant Saints okay Saints because then I described the Saints Jersey the Saints jerseys whole a road jersey I think I might like more than their home jerseys I like the all-white that's I'm saying yeah we're wearing all white yeah oh yeah all way sick with like the gold numbers on it okay so that was our recap that was a great recap I fucking love no guess Monday I'm just gonna say it boys I love you guys let's talk a little college football before we do who's back and then a couple segments to wrap up the show college football is Jim Harbaugh in the hot seat I say this

with all due respect for our friend coach Jim Harbaugh he's our guy he's our guy he got out Harbaughed he's got he's he tried to do the thing where he turns Michigan into a spread offense mm-hmm and then he ran into his ideal football team 100% in Wisconsin yep and he was just I every time the camera cut to him on the sideline he was just staring out at the field wishing that that was the offense that he was right just hands on his knees yep looking at nine full backs a center and a quarterback and saying god damn it this is what I want to do but people said I needed to pass the ball and now I'm getting my ass kicked by

myself right we bullied them yes we bullied the fuck out of Michigan it was there's one thing to be beat when like an air raid team beats you and just throws it all over the yard when when you just go man-on-man and just run the ball down a team's throat there's something like primal about it what Wisconsin did to Michigan it was primal yeah just dude-on-dude we just can fuck them up yeah just skull man man but man I think Jim Harbaugh is gonna go to the NFL in the next couple years because I don't know what happened but his teams just don't look like Jim Harbaugh teams anymore they he's lost the juice that

was like his defining quality of having those tough teams the Stanford team that beat the shit out of a more a way better USC team the you know the 49ers teams that would always play really really tough defense and even them even the Michigan teams that he had the first couple years I honestly think that 2016 lost the JT Barrett game when they had the inch wrong and whatever parallax angle I think something ended there like that was kind of the end of what Jim Harbaugh was and he's got to refind it because I know he's a good coach and now obviously people will swarm on him because he is a lightning rod and a guy that people

like to talk about and I don't think that he's just lost his ability to coach he's just lost something like the essence of Jim Harbaugh feels like it's gone he feels like he's cheating on himself right by running this type of off right and even like his his fullback Ben Mason low man trophy inaugural award winner got switched up to playing defense a line then they gave him was that his first carry of the year and he fumbled right away yeah because he hasn't had the reps on it or whatever but I agree with you I think that Harbaugh is going to the NFL at some point I think my prediction the Redskins are

gonna throw a shitload of money at him this offseason so we can finally get to see Dwayne Haskins lose up close so he can coach them for a while yeah I wouldn't be surprised if you eat Jim I like you and because I like you I want to keep you as far away from Washington as possible yeah don't do that for you the other good news for everyone listening right now I've officially got my hopes up for the Wisconsin Badger season so we all know how that will end that's gonna be great as I sit here right now I think they're the best team in the country I like that I like that Paul Chris though does run like the Jude the quintessential

Jim Harbaugh he says I'll see your khakis I'll raise you a sweatshirt there is something to be said about having an identity Wisconsin will never win a national title they'll never have the best athletes but they will always do the same thing and they will do that thing better than everyone else and as long as they don't run into like the elite elite teams that have way better athletes they can win most of their games yeah it's like it's comforting knowing yeah we'll probably just go to the fucking I don't know if you saw I tweeted that picture back-to-back Capital One Bowl champs a little bit of a

dynasty but there's some comforting knowing hey Capital One Bowl that shits ours yeah you have a niche so who are you gonna play in the big 10 championship game oh how state will be our second crack at them and then we'll beat them twice I think okay so good so yeah dominance and then national championship yes okay yeah it's on also on the other side of things down south in the SEC yes we are on a crash course for LSU Alabama yep November 9th yep I believe hopefully we can score touchdown PSA if you're getting married on November 9th and you live anywhere below let's say Kentucky you need to

you need to cancel your wedding yeah right now yeah because your wedding will be cursed yes you actually have it and you keep people from being happy and watching football on that day yeah yeah I agree your marriage will not last for three years if you get married on that day the other big SEC game Georgia I actually Notre Dame was a lot more impressive than I thought because I thought there's gonna get the shit kicked out of them Georgia fans and that night crowd the thing they did with the lights where it looked like hell the entire stadium turned red it was like Bulldog hell mm-hmm was awesome mm-hmm

that was so sick it was intense yeah how how bad someone was I think it was just one guy who's standing in the basement just flicking the lights how bad do you think Ugo was scared during all that oh yeah oh yeah dogs are color blind and then dude could you imagine I mean if you're a student at Georgia and you don't go to the games with the wrestling like the linebacker pads with the wrestling spikes on them what the fuck are you doing that's the coolest look in the world it's a good point yeah point yeah if you're the guy that goes if you're wearing a polo shirt and you're a student going to a Georgia game

right you're not gonna suck any face that night did you see Kirby smart without a hat how much sex do you think is happening between two people that are in full makeup with pads on a lot after that a lot a lot that's pretty awesome that's metal as fuck yes it is did you see Kirby smart without his visor on in game day it looks strange it looks strange he looks like he looked like chase his dad he does look like chase dad he looks like he looks like the accountant for a church like not the actual you know he's not an actual priest or the head of the church he's he's like the president of the church and

he just I don't know what it was but him without a visor he should never take that is kind of like Doug Peterson some guys once you commit to the visor life don't ever take it off yeah because everyone will be shocked yeah without the visor he definitely gives off the aura of a marshal on a golf course that doesn't do his job yes it just lets everybody play super weird okay let's do some also Mike leach that was a crazy Pac-12 game I don't know what the fuck happened the world was asleep Mike leach hates running the ball so much but even when he's up by 30 points he doesn't have a handoff in the playbook

someone asked cuz cuz Dana had a similar yeah that's who laying game was crazy but Mike leach did our is this our problem I don't know but Mike leach the Pac-12 just cannibalize itself the Pac-12 every year no matter what there'll be a Friday in a sat a late Saturday night game where the perceived best teams will lose to just like junk yeah and then we'll be sitting here in November trying to figure out who's in the college football playoff but what about a team from the Pac-12 bike oh no actually their best team lost to Cal and Arizona State for no reason I just I just realized right now I'm not worried

anymore about Jim Harbaugh getting corrupted by Dan Snyder because Snyder is definitely gonna throw like 50 million dollars at Chip Kelly that's yeah that's how well that's how all this ends bring them back the chip the chip error all right let's do who's back the week before we do that pft you got something for us yes before we get into who's back the week I want to talk to you guys about Peloton Peloton cycles I have one in my living room I've been using it I've been on that thing three four times a week trying to get back into shape a little bit for probably realistically probably not next summer

but two summers from now I'm gonna be in good shape and it's gonna be because I'm riding my Peloton men's health called the Peloton bike the best cardio machine on the planet and let's break it down real quick if you can't find a workout that keeps you engaged you can use Peloton it's an immersive cardio experience with real-time features that will always keep you coming back it's got a compact four by two size it fits in virtually any space in your home no matter how small one subscription is all you need to get unlimited classes for the entire family there's no commute no reservations that's the best part of

this thing if I'm sitting in my apartment I don't have time to go to the gym in the morning I don't have time to go out go for a run I can just hop on my bike don't have to schedule it at any certain time don't have to make a reservation don't have to walk to the gym I just get on my bike I pick a class and I go it can be 20 minutes it be 30 minutes it be 45 minutes it be an hour long class it makes hard work fun get in your zone with curated music designed to move and motivate you hip-hop or country or Latin or pop whatever you're in the mood for we got classes waiting for you with a variety of themes

difficulty levels and training programs experience something new every time you sweat you get live encouragement from top instructors so it makes you want to keep coming back for more and we're giving a special limited time offer it's part of my take listeners get a hundred bucks off accessories when you purchase the Peloton bike and get a great cardio workout at home go to one peloton.com use promo code my take that's a brand new promo code promo code my take to get started compete against me send me I don't know if you if there's like a messaging feature on there but if there is send me messages and be like

hey PFT get on your bike fat-ass beach week 2022 is right around the corner and you need that six-pack so I will see you on your Peloton okay who's back of the week Hank go my who's back the week is Kevin Durant on his burner account oh yeah there was a first Magic Johnson was on first take on Friday and they talked about Kevin Durant and they tweeted or someone just tweeted the clip it said at Magic Johnson good take on at Katie Trey's comments Kevin Durant commented from his regular account and just said horrible take just regurgitated bullshit and then deleted it oh so he's like there's levels to this now he's

created many different characters amongst his burner account mm-hmm I like that I like that there's a whole different universe of internet commenters living inside Kevin Durant's head I don't get why this doesn't stick like just just don't delete it yeah or come on the podcast yeah one or the other I fucking love that so he's got like one burner account that he uses to reverse he probably has a first take one a first things first one yep yep my take but he's like setting himself up where he comments and he says hey that was a great take way to stick it to Kevin Durant and then another burner account

the good one commenting on the bad ones takes I love this I hope he's okay but I love this yeah he's he's definitely in the point of no return of burner accounts mm-hmm he's just too deep Kevin instead of doing this just set up a sock puppet theater in your living room yeah just videotape it and then just get all your emotions out between the two puppets no no no keep going I'm skip Baylor's because I'm and this is my wife Ernestine and we both think that Kevin is dookie it Kevin Durant no drip alice dude drip alice excuse you feel it's America's sex symbol Kevin ranch for Ernestine Joe geez dude she's getting it no it's a

Sunday they're in different rooms that's true that is they're not yeah they're not sleeping in the same bedroom he's got a gun for undisputed Kevin Durant just needs to keep going because eventually he will just like own all the Twitter accounts he's just talking to himself just get them all he has a hundred percent of Twitter accounts Kevin Durant is gonna make a shitload of money because he's gonna have every single Twitter possible combination of Twitter handles right and then he can sell them off for profit yes yes exactly all right is that it yeah I mean my little one just bills mafia but we kind of talked

earlier yes this is your week bills mafia this is their week this is 100% I hereby give the city of Buffalo off I think they flexed it to 8 o'clock like they wouldn't make it that's why they can't because you were early in the season but yeah they're not flexing because they can't no I'm saying no they're saying they can't quote well no they literally cannot allegedly flex schedule doesn't start that's what they say because it's the Patriots and they don't want the Patriots in prime time the NFL says that the flex schedule doesn't start until later in the season that's what they want you to believe yeah

exactly because they're keeping the Patriots down precisely PFC what do you got my first who's back of the week is distracts distracts are back in a big way we've been talking about for a while my diss track on drink is coming at the end of this episode oh shit you're just you're you're you're Drizzy my Drizzy Drizzy diss my Gizzy on Drizzy is nice and Gizzy on Drizzy listen I'm doing the the hand the tattoo of the hands praying together yep this is me for Drake right now praying for your son oh bless up because this is a pretty fire track and shout out to Hank for recording it dropped we laid down the

wax last week nice and so yeah it's good so you think he's gonna clap back I don't think he's gonna win it's not just on Twitter you gotta go on his Instagram comes big oh my god oh my god if he owns your ass you're dead yeah Drake PFC com to put you in a locked you in a cage bitch yeah and Henry one yeah verified now yeah there's only one shout out to the AWL they got me verified yeah shout out my hero yeah we can slide in everyone's damn Drake's hearing this is already too late because I fucking I got Doug Doug big Dougie Doug would work at Twitter we're on a name kick which I'm sorry yeah I mean

on Twitter yeah what's Drake's real name Audrey yeah I wish I knew that all sorts of stuff that you can rhyme with Audrey Aubrey I feel Aubrey are you shitting me his name's Aubrey your your Drake take was one of those ones you just said and I think you don't even like dude you just you just said it when the Venom in these bars yeah but it's just like it welcome to life man sometimes you say shit and then you paint yourself into a corner and then you can't get out my gun and you can't get out of it until you drop a district either who's back the week is Perry Ellis because he got hired by Kansas to be an assistant

there and perfect he's going he's finishing his undergrad degree at Kansas Perry Ellis the guy that played at Kansas for seven years he didn't do it didn't finish his undergrad degrees come on so he's going back and he's getting his good for him listen we're a pro education podcast hell yeah we are we are good for you I'm a big fan of yours Perry half of the podcast didn't finish college but we are pro education we are we're pro do anything that you want yes in Lawrence Kansas yeah and so he's going back there just in time for Bill Seltzer to be fired for massive NCAA

violations where he can take over the program as a podcast we average a half of a bachelor degree that's pretty good that's right that's pretty good um all right my who's back I have two versus nostalgia went back to Madison this weekend nostalgia fucking sucks man when you just go back to your college and you're just like yep I wish I was 21 again so this sucks and just seeing like all these kids yeah you guys know going back to your college yeah nostalgia just sucks it's basically poison for your brain it's rat poison it really is rat poison because I was I was happy to be back Madison is

the best college town in the world but it was also seems like just yesterday the whole time I was just like damn socks time there's a work there's also something where you're walking around a college campus at 8 a.m 9 a.m and the air smells like stale beer just from everywhere oh it's the best the entire town smells like stale beer and you're like man I really wish this was my life I mean I don't really drink much anymore but when I was back like the beers just went like down so smoothly so cold so delicious yes it was awesome crisp but like you know it's wild to think about is 20 years from now you're going to look back at

this moment and be like damn that was awesome when the whole room smelled like monsters I had all five fingers yeah fingers oh you cut your finger off talking about you oh okay all right also nostalgia so my other who's back similar nostalgia nostalgia for the Cubs being miserable and sucking so Cubs are not gonna make playoffs for the first time in since 2014 they know they're not out okay shut up uh they were so embarrassing this weekend people want to dance on my grave and yeah you can go ahead and do it because they were a joke and Joe Madden just managed his last game at Wrigley so actually if Leroy wants to

break that right now yeah Joe Madden out as Cubs manager after the season you're saying that yes what's your source yeah my brain I'm giving you a little behind my brain on how Leroy works yeah yeah I say who's your source my brain okay good enough for him there we go so breaking news Leroy's gonna tweet that out you're hearing it right now for the first time are you gonna follow him I follow him okay I definitely follow I get I get about a message or two a day saying how come big cat doesn't follow Leroy on on it's not the worst no Twitter on Twitter on Twitter I'm pretty sure I follow him on Twitter okay I don't know if I follow him

on breaking news according to sources close to me part of my take parentheses Leroy Joe Madden will not return return as manager he doesn't follow me he only follows one person oh he follows a dog yeah it was a hot all right yeah Joe Madden's out the Cubs think they need to shake up you can't get swept at home by the Cardinals it was fucking it's just the most frustrating year because they're not bad but they are bad I'm done the man who brought in a magician pulls a final disappearing at he's out bark there you go bark bark one behind this rough cally account yeah the last yeah it's good looking cally yeah it is um all right so yeah the Cubs suck I don't

know what else I can say about that so here's what you can say about that because they won you a fucking world yeah no but also I'm about to take away your Cubs pinstripes because you're being you're not mathematically out they're not mathematically out yet uh the the Natty's Natitude's back but there's still eight games left no Joe Madden is gonna be the he's the most successful manager in Cubs history you won a world series but when you have the talent they have and the way when you lose four games at home to your rival and you also lose two games to the Reds in the in the seasons on the line you have a little more fight than that so it was it was a bad season up and down and uh yeah I don't know what else they do they just puttered and and

fucking fell on their face down the finish line so who who's going to be the GM uh the manager no you're sticking with Theo yeah well could you blame the president of baseball get hoarsely couldn't you blame Theo for all this I think David Ross the new manager if you want to do that too with Lee Roy no Lee Roy doesn't travel up speculation yeah I mean this is also my brain David Ross the new manager not Ryan Sandberg no he's not whatever happened already got passed up what happened to Ryan because he was one of those guys that I was like either Mark Grace or Ryan Sandberg should be the manager he grinded his ass off in uh in minor leagues and then there's like uh actually not um okay let's do the end of the show segments everything else pft you got one more

ad for us yes I do okay I want to talk to you guys about mugsie jeans we love mugsie jeans we love sweatpants here on this show more than anything and we love comfort and guess what mugsie jeans are the jeans that are the closest to feeling like you're wearing sweatpants that I've ever put on in my entire life they're the most comfortable jeans ever made you've heard the name from us before mugsie jeans are the only jeans we wear because they look like jeans but they feel like sweatpants it's not an exaggeration we don't know how the guys at mugsie did it but their jeans feel like sweatpants that had sex with even more comfortable sweatpants and somehow had an awesome jeans baby mugsie was started by a stoolie who was tired of being uncomfortable in his jeans

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use promo code PMT for 10 bucks off that's a beer on us and a pair of the most expensive or in a pair of the most comfortable and least expensive jeans ever made by heading to mugsie.com use promo code PMT I honestly love my mugsie jeans I wear them just about every day and winter besides jumpsuit january get yourself a pair mugsy.com use promo code PMT and get 10 bucks off okay football guy of the week we have a few nominees uh let's see first up we have packers fullback recurring guest Danny Vitale he uh he got caught at the goal line he went down at the one yard line went down to the one yard line one inch line um some may say that's bad when you get you know caught from behind at the one inch line but he said it was all part of his plan to get a full

back assist so that's a football guy through and through fullback shouldn't score they should help others score super backs super backs uh we had bills tight end Lee Smith for saying my wife's about the only one that can make me feel better than that that's just the facts after the team won and improved to 3 and 0 so congrats on the sec shout out to your wife that's pretty sick uh should we do Bruce Arians for taking the delay game to make his kicker move no that's not football guy actually how about Morningside college strength coach Aaron Jung toward both his patellar tendons when celebrating a touchdown yeah so we that's unconfirmed unconfirmed got that as a tip there surprisingly there's not a whole lot of news reports out there you are addicted about

no i i told jake earlier i was like we probably shouldn't do that one because there are no articles about it okay uh let's do this one let's do so we have the bills uh tight end Lee Smith but backers fullback Danny Vitale Rutgers o lineman michael uh my adi who punched his q b in the face after the uh scarlet nice scored a td that's gotta come the thing that's an o lineman getting so excited that he and also very ruckers i was gonna say through and through that is the most powerful new jersey energy of all time and then i'll do last one let's do this you don't really love a guy until you hit him in the face yes yeah friends hit each other in the face absolute fact uh last one we'll combine the next segment respect the biz i think bellichick should be on

there for essentially like ending a reporter with his eyes tina jakemson so if you've ever seen a bill bellichick press conference he does that stare yes all the time the only thing that was different was this was in close quarters very close and also the subject material they were talking about which is why did you have anthony brown and then cut them and then uh a lot of the stuff that anthony brown was and has been accused of doing was to women right and it was a female reporter i'm Hank i'm telling you why the why it was a bad look got it i and i know for a fact that bellichick would give that exact same look to edwarder if it was edwarder asking questions but that's everyone but in context it appeared worse is what i'm saying she could say what do

you have for lunch and he probably would have given her that probably correct so is he on the list because you know i don't eat on game day all right so he's the last football guy of the week by the way american ninjas on in the studio it's 1 30 the morning it's electric i've never watched this right no it's so easy now oh like it's not it hank could do it yeah give me a couple months to train okay seekie question promo code take ten dollars off seekie purchase do you think we could get hank on one of these and how many attempts would it take for him to complete it i don't i don't think he would ever complete it ever ever no matter how much he trained i don't think ultimate restarts i don't know what the wall at the end yeah the salmon ladder you can't even catch a salmon

in your hands much less climb up one of the ladders proven correct oh is this the wall right here yeah you yeah you can't you can't i would love to see you just keep falling though falling on your you know what i'm gonna say something nice about chase okay chases chase is they're all gone by the way none of the chases are listening anymore chases can they can top out at being an american ninja warrior course builder yes yes absolutely and because because because another nice thing about chase i would say chase you can also get a black belt yep as an adult and it's not creepy no that you spent every thursday night going to karate class yeah and a bunch of children and it's not weird that the instructor was like hey i've got a live one here that pays me fifty dollars a week

that i'll just keep it i'll keep around and keep awarding him gradually increased ranks keeps asking about mr meaghi and i play along no chase you got congratulations on the black belt but now you have to stick around because there's secret black belts after this don't tell anyone will be fifty dollars a hundred dollars they also need to bring back nxc like it's just uh all right let's let's wrap it up with uh we got two more stay classy Clemson because they filmed a movie at halftime of their game against charlotte that's got to be the most disrespectful thing a team could ever have is be like with a fake team though so at halftime they had 60 players in clemson jerseys and helmets running down from the hill and like touching the rock yeah a lot of

people in the crowd and they should have touched that rock dabbo you sold out as members of the 2019 they like oh they got some they got some old players to come back got it so it's a little bit it's a little bit within in-house that would suck so bad like if i i would imagine it there's a couple guys who got called up and they're like uh i'm like 70 pounds overweight and i cannot fit in these pads anymore dabbo definitely was like i need to be compensated for my role as a head coach but you guys are all gonna be volunteers yes by the way they're literally using crisis actors oh and also everyone on the current Clemson roster definitely got you know a little oh hey trevor laurence your first grip it was $400,000 yeah interesting uh but yeah that's if you're charlotte

oh whoops like and this game's gonna suck so bad that we're just gonna it's at halftime we're gonna let a fake film or a real film with a fake team be filmed whoops wouldn't you know it accidentally all the fake football players left behind their fake steroids and your lockers took guys better taste them to make sure they're not going bad last up we have uh but that sucks for the marching band yeah true didn't think about that didn't think about the poor people in the marching band took the shine off maybe they did a halftime performance where it was actors playing a marching band too there you go there you go everyone's happy all right last segment pardon my french i this we didn't even plan this but we got quoted for our garderman shoe story on friday

in people magazine and they said popular podcast pardon my french so how do you spell we uh w tense i was going for the german version of the english translation of the french word comes out to wi well i love what hank does this every now and then i fucking love it when he like makes a big mistake on twitter and then you can actually see that he just he just like takes rest of the day he's like you know what i'm just gonna put this one on ice he took a day and a half off you know what it got too hot on these streets i made a mistake if i don't check the mentions if i don't go on for a while then the most recent mention isn't going to be roasting me so it's like you basically just like you you're like hey coach i'm ready to

come out of this game for a second i i would have been disappointed if hank had spelled we we correctly yeah that would have been way a weird word it's all vowels yeah i thought it was a quick easy win we wasn't wait so you did wi wi yep well you could have just said you were you were pumped about uh the badgers victory with the fucking oh you should pumped about the badgers this is friday i think oh fuck you can also just go with ha ha ha ha how the i trust trust spell that ha ho n h h u g n h g n h huh that doesn't play as well as wi wi if spelled correctly huh you gotta mention makes me feel like it's a summer day evict the caterpillar that will slowly be roasted upon the open fire they may see that cheese is stinky cheese huh give me that stinky

cheese and i'm not talking about a festival you stupid american all right that's the show listen listen to american podcast listen to pft's drizzzy jizzy huh in there trick you a fake i love you and i love you and i love you Honey for some high schoolers you fucking weirdo massage a Nick nurse you just can't do this version of a bread thirst thinking biggie but you're too gangly at least puff that he only had one family look at your sweaters that you can fit in when you got a secret child got a spy kid ooh you flow is weak I'm sorry to brought you a coonies speaker like Iowa Raptors boy do you fuck the wise the crazy's but Toronto lost a star you stink

like your anus your lips are too bitter you've got a big red spot like a giant gold shower herpes can't stop you're an ass trap I call you MC square I got Carlos Cruz a look in here party my drink let's chop it up brah you can't rhyme you and your boy Johnny football both blowing lines your flow is on xanax state behind bars if you're hearing this it's too late dog walk you don't stop save your money so that you can't spend all the dozen trapper keep us for your girl friend it's so lazy when you try to spit a simple rhyme you're in the next line with the same word just to make it rhyme I've only watched a grassy portrait grassy Tyson explain the black hole that somehow swallowed your white son drink drink is a fake fake fake a snake snake

snake give me a break break break it's part of my take presented by bar stool sports