Pardon My Take - Pete Prisco On Tebow, Baffert Excuse Bingo + Mason Gordon The Inventor Of Slamball

Episode Date: May 12, 2021

Bob Baffert excuse bingo rages on and we're totally on his side (3:23 - 11:34). NBA talk, Russ Westbrook and remembering Colt Brennan (11:34 - 22:57). Hot Seat/Cool Throne including pussy kazoos (22:57 - 42:26). Pete Prisco joins the show to talk Tim Tebow and what the hell are the Jaguars doing, plus Aaron Rodgers, and the best NFL Draft fits (42:26 - 70:53). Mason Gordon, the inventor of Slamball joins the show to talk about the sport, how it's coming back, how he created it and more (70:53 - 106:36). We finish with FAQ's and some nut tapping stories.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, add free on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we have a twofer for the people. We have Pete Prisco, our good friend, NFL writer, Florida resident.

Tebow, film watcher, blocker on Twitter, Tebow Hader. So we're gonna break down, he covered Tim Tebow in his college days. He's obviously a Jacksonville native or a resident, so he is gonna cover Tebow now. So we have him on to talk about Tim Tebow. We have the inventor of Slam Ball. A little bit of different interview, kind of cool.

Slam Ball is going to be back and we're trying to ride that wave. We also have some Bob Baffer cleanup, some NBA talk, some Hot Seat Cool Drone, and we're gonna finish with FAQs and some listener-submitted, nut-tapping, retirement stories after Monday's show, and we brought that up.

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Okay, let's go. Boy! Boy! Now in the street there is violence and then a lot of soft work to be done. No place to hang alone washing and then I can't play all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock down to electric high venue

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that will get you matched perfectly with the wine, you will love brightcellars.com slash take. Today is Wednesday, May 12th, and Bob Baffert has finally admitted that he was set up by his veterinarian. Well yeah, so he admitted that there was steroids in the medication that was given to the horse, but he didn't intentionally know that,

he actually pulled, it's very funny, he pulled the old excuse that you hear in the NFL all the time, like I took a supplement at the advice of one of my trainers, not realizing what was in it. I should have done better work in figuring out exactly what the molecular compound was that I was putting in my system,

but it was prescribed to me, I did not know that I was doing that. The guy at GNC gave me the protein shake. I had no idea that it could have steroids in it. That's pretty much what he said. This was, by the way, on Monday, we obviously don't do a show on Monday night, but Bob Baffert went back to the excuse bingo card,

and I know that there's gonna be a lot of people who hate Bob Baffert. I have fallen in love with Bob Baffert, because he essentially just said, I'm just gonna keep going with the excuse, I'm gonna flood the zone, I'm a pitcher who doesn't have a great fastball, but if I can just throw strikes and get some ground balls,

I might get myself out of it. He went with, there was a barn worker who was taking cough medicine and peed on the hay, and then Medina Spirit ate the hay. It's very confusing when they refer to the barn worker, because they call it a groom. The groom was drinking cough syrup and peed on the hay, which contained drugs.

Correct. He said, cancel culture is coming after Medina Spirit, which I agree. It's just another cancel culture, run amok, trying to cancel a goddamn horse. Well, it's happened twice at the Kentucky Derby. They canceled, was it War Machine a couple years ago? Well, we canceled Nyquist.

Nyquist. And Nyquil, the cough medicine. That's Listerquil. Yeah, Listerquil. Wait, was War Machine the guy that won? A lot of people, by the way, reached out, said that was a genius idea. Said also Barbara Cuffalo, as we called it,

was also a genius idea. No, no, no, no, not Barbara Cuffalo. That's totally different. This is Buffa Q. Buffa Q. They said, wow, you guys are geniuses. We're like, hey, you know what, you're right. But yes, so Nyquist got canceled by us. Who was the other one that got canceled?

Was it War Machine at the Kentucky Derby? Who was the horse that won, but then they had to disqualify him afterwards? Oh, that was a couple years ago. Yes, yes, yes. So maybe this is the new thing. He went into, Medina Spirit went into war mode. Yeah, he got canceled.

Maximum security, point 19. There we go. So, I love Bob Baffert. I don't know where this is gonna lead to. We're gonna have Randy Moss on for the Preakness on Friday's show, give us a couple picks and make sense of this. But either way, free Bob Baffert,

there's a lot of things wrong with horse racing. Bob Baffert isn't one of them. Well, it's also funny that, going into this next race, Bob Baffert has, he's self-imposed a suspension. So, he's not going to the track because he doesn't want to be a distraction from the horse. He wants the horse just to go out there and run this race.

I love it. So, Medina Spirit is racing in the Preakness. As of right now. That's awesome. I love it. And I actually wonder if there's a difference if Bob Baffert is at the track. Is there something that a trainer is able to do

like the day of the race besides give him steroids? Yeah, I think it's just the steroids. Just the steroids. So, there'll be somebody else there. I think when you see Bob Baffert, if you're a horse, you probably get a little fear. Yeah. Like if I don't perform here,

I won't get the steroids anymore. I think that Bob Baffert should actually take this opportunity to just load up on steroids right now. It's probably the easiest way to get away with it. No one's going to be expecting you to do the exact same thing again. Think about it. If you're a junky horse like Medina Spirit

and you look at Bob Baffert and he's like, hey, you better win this race. Well, what could he do? Oh, he could take away your steroids and then you'd go and withdraw. Yeah. So, yeah, I think Bob Baffert being there does matter. Absolutely, yeah.

Now, this is like if you're actually addicted to these steroids, which, I don't know how steroids work when it comes to a horse. This is very complicated for me. I guess the steroid that they were using was for recovery. Yeah. That's what it was like. It was like a Z-Pack.

It was a light dose. It was a fucking Z-Pack. It was a light dose of steroids. He had a little cough. He had a little fucking thing, he had a little bump on his dick. Can you administer human growth hormone to a horse? I wish we had an expert to tell us.

Alas, we don't. Alas, we don't. That's what you say. They should just use a smaller jockey. That's how you compensate for the fact that you can't use steroids. Yes, yes. How much of your newfound love for Bob Baffert

comes directly from the fact that you won on Saturday. 99%? 99%. Oh, if I were, if the roles were reversed, listen, we are very much hypocrites on this show. If roles were reversed and I was wronged and I had the second horse, or if I had the last place horse,

I would be screaming, I wouldn't do anything because that would take effort, but I would maybe sign a petition online. But yeah, I would be very, very upset, but guess what? Hank, my job was to pick the winning horse on Kentucky Derby Saturday. I did my job. My favorite part.

What happened after is not my fault. I would be very happy with the goings on this week, regardless of if I won or not, just because I love public liars. Yeah. I love people that have no shame in lying, that are just out there trying, like you said, throwing everything against the wall.

He doesn't think he's lying. No, he doesn't. No. As George Costanza said, it's not a lie if you truly believe it. So Bob Baffert just knows that Bob Baffert is a hell of a good trainer, and he can't possibly be guilty

of what he's been accused of for the last 40 times that his horses have been accused of using steroids. Correct. It's not his fault. I can see that there's a pattern there, but it's not Bob Baffert's fault. No. It says Bob Baffert.

It says Bob Baffert. And so anytime you can get in front of the media and just lie to such a ridiculous degree, I actually, in a weird way, gain a little bit more respect for you. Yeah, absolutely. He's just going up there and being like, I'm gonna keep going.

Again, flooding the zone and hoping one of these sticks, and guess what? All of them have stuck with me. I could go, I'll defend Bob Baffert to the end of the earth because I have more than enough excuses for him. And again, this is because I won money on the Kentucky Diversary. I have something that says what steroids horses can use.

Okay. Okay. There's four. I don't know why I hate you. Well, I mean, you don't really have to worry about Hank's feelings. The Federal Drug Administration allows four steroids. Windstraw, Equipose, Duraball, and Testosterone

to be administered to horses. That's a lot of drugs that horses are allowed to take. So every horse that we see. When he's like old school shit. Yeah, they're drinking like a greenie coffee that they used to do in baseball back in the day. Horses, every horse that you see out there is a junkie. Yeah.

Hank, so you used to take windstraw. Do you think you could have won the Kentucky Derby? At your peak? Honestly, probably, yeah. Okay. Well, there it goes. So it is clearly a performance answer. All right. Other news.

I mean, we'll, we'll. I'd have to be riding the horse, obviously. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. But you could have won it. Right. Yes. The, just the pure rage.

Randy Moss will, will give us some picks on, he picked Medina Spirit or he gave, he told us a story. So, I don't know. Maybe you'll have a, maybe you'll pick him again. What a story it would be if Medina Spirit won. The Triple Crown? Yeah.

I would love it. So would there be an asterisk next to it? Yeah. I think there already is. It's almost more impressive if you're able to, if you're able to overcome cheating blatantly and still win the Triple Crown. Yeah. I have no idea why this horse is allowed to race this week

in this junkie horse. I think, yeah, I don't either. I feel like it's going to get pulled the last second, but we shall see. So the other things we had, NBA, we're getting close to the end of the season. This does feel, if you watch the NBA like every night, it feels like everyone's just ready for the playoffs

to start, myself included. But we had two big news stories. One was Russell Westbrook broke the Triple Double record in perfect Russell Westbrook fashion. He grabs the rebound and then comes up in bricks of three. But I'm respecting Russell Westbrook. So I'm not doing the, there's a lot of people out there who want to say

that he sucks and these are hollow stats. I like Russell Westbrook. The dude just tries really fucking hard all the time. I don't think anybody's saying that Russell Westbrook sucks, but people are saying like that he's definitely like a stat pattern at times, and that he knows how to get Triple Doubles. I'm not.

Listen, if you can excel at something, then you should try to excel. Like if you don't want Russell Westbrook to get Triple Doubles, then stop him. Yeah. Cause you know what the game plan is going into. It's Russell's, Russell's going to eat. He's going to eat every single night.

And what's remarkable is like Russell Westbrook and Bradley Beal have made the Wizards like a team that people are talking about a little bit now. And historically, I would make the argument that the Wizards are probably the least consequential team to ever pay attention to in all of sports. It's like them and the Florida Panthers. Florida Panthers.

Florida Panthers are always the answer to that. It's neck and neck. Florida Panthers. Listen, I grew up in the DC area and there was nothing that ever happened with the Washington Wizards. Unless they lost 10 games in a row or won 10 games in a row,

you should never pay attention to them. You can get through life just fine, not having any of your brain space taken up by the Washington Wizards. It is really good this year. Did they make that up for the home town team? Yeah, apparently second in the Central. It's going to be the Florida Cup.

There we go. It's going to be the Panthers and the Lightning. The playing games, which I don't like how they're set it up this year, but I'll give the NBA credit for this. We are talking about these seven, eight, nine, 10 teams more than we would be in a regular season. You know what I mean?

There's definitely some, I mean the Pacers, they hate their coach. It's weird, it's going on. Like the Bulls are fighting for it. The Wizards are kind of fun to watch. Then you have the Warriors and the Lakers might match up. So the idea that this gets more teams involved

and gets us talking about more teams, I get it. I still think it's stupid that you could finish with the seventh seed and not make the playoffs. That part is very dumb to me. Yeah, but on the other hand, I love chaos. Yeah, but there's a, if you're a seven seed,

you're probably not going to win the championship. Like there's definitely, I don't know. Like imagine the Lakers, I know obviously this is, I'm hurting my own argument because I'm basically lebroning myself because if the Lakers get bounced as the seventh seed and don't even make the playoffs and be like, that's awesome.

That's the coolest thing ever. That definitely counts. But I'd be fucking pissed if my team was the seventh seed and got bounced from the entire playoffs. By a bad team. Yes, by a bad team. Just in a kind of a fluke one, two game run there.

Yeah, I think maybe whichever team loses in the playing game, they should play against the other loser in the other conference. And then they get to come back and play maybe, I'm trying to figure out a way to have a playing game for another playing game. Because I just, I like double playing.

I like to, when it comes to the NBA and the playoffs, it's like, you know, there's four teams that could probably realistically have a chance at winning. So just let the other guys just fuck around for a while. Let them get their exercise, because obesity is a problem in America. A series of playing games until you just get to the one seed.

Why don't you, here's what they should do. The entire season should be teams playing each other. And then based on who ends up with the best records in all those playing games, then you get seeded one through eight going into the playoffs. That would never work. Probably not.

Never work. And then the other story, Hank, Jalen Brown, out for the season. Did you see this coming? Was he like- He had been out for the last few games, but they didn't, you know, it didn't seem like he was going to be out for,

it happened at the end of the game too, like a meaningless, it was like a meaningless. Oh, was it the one when he ran into Jason Tatum? Well, that was- We were watching it live. He went out after that and then he hasn't really come back. I honestly think that this is a good excuse for you. Like you can now say, well, that didn't, like-

They weren't going to make any noise in the playoffs anyway. If your team is underwhelming. Yeah, right. If your team is underwhelming all season, which I would, that was the South West, right? They're underwhelming all season to lose a key player right before the playoffs. You can basically sell yourself next year,

being like, well, we don't know. We don't know what happened. We got all our guys back, going at like, we weren't healthy in the playoffs last year, we were missing key contributors. And then boom, immediate excuse. Big Cat's right. This is a perfect confluence of events for you right now,

because you don't have to face the harsh reality that the bubble Celtics were a fluke. I still like the, you know, there's hope that, you know, if we got matched up between the Nixers, the Sixers. No, but that was stupid, I'm saying, yeah. No, I still think- Oh, you still think that. Because then it's a win-win.

No one expects us to win. And if we upset them, it'll be great. If the Celtics like beat, you're right. If the Celtics beat the Sixers, no one's going to knock the Celtics if they lose that matchup because they don't know I'm chilling around. But if they do win-

It's like when they went to the Eastern Conference finals against the Caps. Yeah, right. Which was the year Kyrie was out and Jason Tatum like came out of a shell in every year. Or the Isaiah Thompson too. But if you played the Nix, even if people expected the Nix to win,

if you lose that playoff series against the Nix, it's still, the Nix are back because of the Boston Celtics. It would still feel pretty bad. I want to go see some playoff games at MSG, so it'd be fun to, you know, go to a Celtics one. Yeah, I mean, the Nix are, the Nix definitely will, it will be fun to see the Nix back in the playoffs. That absolutely matters.

And we're right here. Yeah. But yeah, next week. Nix fan or representative hook it up cough. You think James Dolan is going to. You should. After what you did at Madison Square Garden during the dog show.

I'm pretty sure Clem like actually hissed at him in real life. He like went up to him, saw him in public and went, Right at him. Did that happen? That's crazy. But I respect it. Oh, I totally respected Nix fans have every right

to be salty against James Dolan. But yeah, I don't think James Dolan is going to be like, oh, let me hook these guys up. Has he been playing in his band recently? I haven't heard too much about James Dolan and Kazoo. Yeah, Kazoo. Yeah, I really need to get going in the Kazoo. If you're, listen, if you're a fat, kind of goofy,

galoot, there's one thing that you have to not do on stage and that's play a kazoo. That's literally the only thing that's expected of you. Completely makes it illegitimizes your music ability. It actually, it's the worst thing for anybody to do. Yeah, you could. The only thing where you can't respect a person, a recorder after you watch them play the kazoo.

Yeah, a recorder playing hot cross buns. I even think a kazoo is worse because you got the buzz, you got the spit going everywhere. Although when a kazoo solo hits dude, when it hits that extra level, it kind of. Is there, is there somebody that's like the goat kazoo player? I would assume like Rafi, right? The children's guy, children's music guy, the commercial.

Baby Beluga. Outgoing. Yeah, Baby Beluga. Yeah, the Deep Blue Sea. Yeah, what's, there's other ones. I've listened to all of them. Let's see, best kazoo player. He's got to be up there.

Imagine if like Bob Dylan started with the kazoo. That's actually why his career took a while to take off and then if one day switched to harmonica. He started emulating the sound of the kazoo with his voice. So yeah, there's no real greatest kazoo player. Basically how it's, how it's ranked on YouTube is just the most recent person to play the kazoo in a like talent show TV.

So we could possibly become the greatest kazoo player. Says best kazoo player in the world. This is Amy G who is talented in every way. Amy G? She was a sexy babe and an awesome kazoo player. This is funny and very entertaining. Dude, I'll tell you what. If you, if you're trying to like corner a market,

cause this is kind of as the world becomes more like the global world with the internet and everyone's, you know, got a piece of the pie here. Being a big titted kazoo player. I feel like you could get a pretty big fan base. Yeah, for sure. Like you don't. If you have large breasts

and you don't have anything else going for you, you might as well pick up a niche instrument because then you're the person who plays that but also has big boobs. Right, you just every, everyone has, all their interests get flushed out. There's so much entertainment out there. There's so many things to like delve into.

Big titty kazoo player. I think that plays huge. That is huge. There's always going to be a market for that. Send me that link real quick, Jake. Amy G is what you said her name was? Yeah, the video is just called best kazoo player in the world.

That's all? Literally it. Okay. Kazoo porn, you think there's kazoo porn? Oh yeah. Probably go like what that mouth do. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

All right, other. Oh, one sad news, Colt Brennan passed away. That was really sad, unexpected. If you don't remember Colt Brennan at Hawaii, like it was one of the most electric experiences that 2006 year, when I think he threw 58 touchdowns. It was essentially if you were playing the NCAA video game and you put it on like freshmen

and you said how many stats could I put up? That's what Colt Brennan did in real life. Was that him and June Jones? Yeah. And then the next year they went and played Georgia. Hawaii got to like a New Year's Day bowl and they got killed by Hawaii, but they were like, or Georgia,

but they were awesome those days. I think they went 12 and won that year. The year before Colt Brennan threw 58 touchdowns, Heisman finalist. He was a more exciting Mike Leach offense basically. And Colt Brennan had, he dyed his hair blonde and got the state of Hawaii. The islands died into the side of his head.

I remember the Washington Redskins at the time. I don't know if they drafted him or if he was an undrafted free agent, but he was like a preseason legend. Yes. He was electric in the preseason. He was the guy that, you always have that guy at the end of your bench

that you've seen in the preseason and you're like, just let him try. Yeah. Let him try, cause he's a winner. He was, like Colt, that's kind of why I love college sports so much is that you get these guys who are so memorable even if they don't have great pro careers. He was in that list of like, when you think of guys like,

oh man, some of the best quarterbacks they've ever seen in college. Colt Brennan absolutely pops up there. Late night Hawaii games, late night snack in the whack. So yeah, very sad. But like, if you were looking for something to do today, go pull up Colt Brennan highlight tapes and watch him just bomb the ball all over the field.

Then maybe a little kazoo chaser. Little, yeah, a smile on your face. To basically get on the right in the mood about this kazoo. So I just watched the video and she doesn't necessarily play the kazoo with her mouth. Oh. So the world's best kazoo player. I jumped ahead of myself.

Where is she putting the kazoo? Jay. Wait, is it her other lips? Yeah. Oh my God. She's warming it up. This is the horniest thing you've ever done, Jake. Introduce us to Amy G.

Amy G, the legend. Oh man. James Dolan should do that with his butthole. This kind of tells the video with her mouth, but this kind of tells you the state of kazoo play. It does. The number one kazoo player is like, how can we make the kazoo interesting?

Oh, we play with our pussy lips. She actually made it more respectable playing it with her vagina. Like if she played it with her mouth, it would have been like, ooh, she's, that girl's kind of weird. Now I'm like, that's normal. Yeah, that's totally normal.

All right, kazoo, Amy G, we should get her on. She should get her on the show. Why not? Why not? Just talk to her. All right, let's get to our hot seat cool throne. A hot seat cool throne is brought to you by our friends. It's funny that the only way that they can get people

to watch someone play the kazoo is if they stick it up. It's incredible. That is, it's so fucking good. All right, hot seat cool throne is brought to you by our friends at Coors Seltzer. We are on a mission with Coors Seltzer to save the river. So we have a Coors Seltzer leaderboard, scoreboard installed in the studio.

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Go check it out. They have Black Cherry Mango, Lemon Lime and Grapefruit, Coors Seltzer's 4.5% ABV and only 90 calories per 12 ounce. Okay. Hot Sea Cool Drone, by the way, did you guys see that guy who was like, he was basically complaining about how much work goes into scripted podcasts?

That guy's the absolute best. And he was like, hold on, I'm gonna pull it up because it was so funny. There was another thread about that a few years ago. You remember when somebody was talking about how they do their job on NPR and they have like a staff of 15 people that work on a 30 minute podcast? Yes, yes.

So he said, Matt Zeitlin said, good narrative podcasting requires so much work from so many people, research, interviews, working with archival audio, writing scripts, et cetera. And then there are guys who just turn on the mic and BS for an hour and put up huge numbers. And I'm just thinking about like the Pussy Kizoo. That guy's gotta be fucking pounding his death.

Pussy Kizoo is like proof positive. Like, yep. We uncovered a murder from 1972 and then the Pussy Kizoo got us. That guy actually nailed it. He's a million. Oh, he totally got it. Yeah, you can put hours in, you can do research

or you can just get drunk and show up and then Joe Burrow will talk to you as you're throwing up in your hotel room. Dude, Pussy Kizoo's great name for fantasy football team. Hell yeah. Speaking of uncovering murders. See, Matt Express is doing bad, man. Oh shit, that wasn't an entrance for you to bring that up

but I'll take it. So I mean, I'm struggling right now with having to update my lineup every day. I've got, Max Scherzer going out there pitching his heart out. It was such a great shoehorn. I got some guys that are putting up absolute stud numbers right now but other guys that just,

they can't even get out of bed for me. Damn. Like, help me out one time. I drafted well. I got a good grade. I got a good grade on the draft. Those grades are bullshit. Well, when it says that I did a good job, I believe it.

Yeah, that's actually true. When it says you're, it's an F, it's like, well, these fucking nerds don't know. They've never played the game. You mentioned podcasts about uncovering murders. Go listen to the case. Yes. Our co-worker Kirk Minahan.

I saw you treating about that. Great podcast. But he actually is a better guy. Really good and it is true. They put in so much work and then we do pussy. It has become not just one case. There are multiple cases and that's crazy. It's got tentacles.

Yes, go check it out. The case downloaded. I think it's, what are we, episode five? So we have a few more to go. But yes, I'm actually about to binge it. I listened to the first episode twice and then my stupid fucking brain has been completely ruined by streaming services

that if I, like the mayor of East town, right? Have you seen, have you watched that show yet? No, I haven't watched it. With Kate Winslet, I went to watch it and I realized that it was weekly and I just didn't watch it. I was like, I'll watch it when it gets here. How does this happen?

It doesn't come out all at once. Yeah, like let me have an option that I can just watch four episodes on Friday, four episodes on Saturday and two on Sunday and be done with it in a weekend. Big guy, you need to fall back to your roots and like how we watched Game of Thrones and binge after it had already been out

for like four years. Do that, or like Dave, which by the way, I know you finished it. I finished it. I started it, I'm like four episodes in, but if you just wait until it's old, if you wait long enough, it becomes new again and then other people get excited that you're into it

because they get to like relive themselves two years ago. Yeah, long way of saying though, listen to the case. Rhea just started watching The Office so I've been re-watching that. That's the most rewatchable show. It's crazy though, like I was like, yeah, this is so funny. I was like, yeah, it's welcome to 2011.

I'm actually jealous of her. 2009. 2006? Yeah, it was way before that. It was 2005. If I- I'm watching college. I haven't been in college in 14 years. If I were to-

That's sad to say out loud. The Men in Black, like Mind Eraser thing, I wouldn't do it to like erase a painful memory. I would probably just erase my five favorite television shows so I could go back and watch them again. I'm very jealous that Rhea's doing that. Yeah, if I could watch Sopranos again, no spoilers. That would be incredible.

I didn't even, that wasn't even a shot at you, Hank, because I know you need to win this week, but I really would love to watch it again. No spoilers. So the priest is like very much a thing with Carmella and she kind of falls in love with him. I don't think they ever do anything, but like emotionally, she definitely cheats on Tony.

He's creepy. Hank, how's he- He stays overnight. The neighbors see the car. How's he cool, Taran? Do you wanna do this after, Pete? Is he waiting? No, I mean, it's 3.58.

Let's make him wait. All right. He's gonna be fired up. We're basically like sticking him in a rocket and just, you know, whooshing him around and then we're gonna shoot him out of the cannon. We're gonna get him dizzy. My hot seat is Oakland.

They lost the Raiders, they lost the Warriors, and now they're gonna lose the athletics. Probably, unless you think that like Oakland plays ball with the new stadium, which it seems like they're not going to. This sucks. So yeah, hot seat Oakland. That's tough.

That's tough, because I feel like the athletics were a team that had like deeper roots there. Then- Moneyball. Yeah, the money, yeah, Moneyball. They didn't- Mark Mulder. I feel bad because the, was it the Oakland Coliseum

has just been getting shit on it. It's been like the one stadium that everybody like universally has been like this stadium sucks and needs to be updated for the last 15 years, but they just haven't been able to do it. So where are they gonna move the team? Probably. Vegas.

I can, we can't have that. Portland. We need the A's. Yeah. The fucking A's, the fan base and the outfield is so cool. Like, fuck that. We need the A's. Don't do this.

Don't do this. I also love the, like, I love quirks in baseball stadiums and the A's foul ball territory is awesome. It's so stupid. Yep. I feel bad for Dallas Braden. Is he gonna have to move to Vegas? Oh, wow, that would be a shame.

I think he'd be fine. I think he'd do fine. Hank, you're cool, though? My cool throne is this league, NBA, Twitter, players fighting with each other, Bradley Beale and Ken Baysmore. Ken Baysmore, after they played Bradley Beale and Steph Curry had 49 points of 29 minutes,

said that's unreal. We got guys hurting hamstrings to keep up because Bradley Beale hurt his hamstring in the game. Bradley Beale is not happy about that when I'm like a long Twitter rant, said you don't know me or shit about me, bruh. You don't know why I go out there and play it. Damn sure.

And for another man's approval, you would straight lame all caps, but it don't surprise me coming from you. That's why, that's what yo type do. And there was, there was a lot more that are going back and forth. Call McClellan. Clearly, clearly Bradley Beale was, you know,

he was tight about the whole situation. Yeah. It's just good when, you know, there's generic, like not generic, it's like real, like, once you get your all caps locked, lame, like that's from the heart. He called him a type, too, which is actually a great insult

because then it allows the other person to think what the worst type they could be implying is. Yes. So really is psychological torture on your opponent. It's also great in the NBA because there's a clear pecking order and Bradley Beale is far above Kent Basemore. So it's great when like,

you can look at it objectively and be like, yeah, Bradley Beale's got every right. He's a superstar. And wasn't Steph Curry, he like, he looked at Bradley Beale's stats the other night before the game and that's what made him be like, I'm going to go out there and try to drop 50 on him. Well, there, I think they're in,

aren't they, aren't they one and two for points per game? Yeah. So that's why. I think Beale is slightly ahead maybe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Prisco tried the link, Hank. He says the meeting hasn't started yet.

Right. Should we do it? Because he told them to wait. So he's in cyberspace. Should we, is he stuck in cyberspace? You know what, we'll be in the matrix. We'll be back in a second for Hot Sea Cool Terrain. Okay, we're back.

Pete was awesome. He's coming up in a second. Ridiculous human being. I love Pete. Hot Sea Cool Terrain. He was getting more and more angry just being stuck in cyberspace. Also, if you are blocked by Pete,

make sure you listen because we have a special offer for people. PFT, Hot Seat Cool Terrain. Also, can I have your computer charger because my computer's about to die? Yeah, here's my computer charger. Thank you. My Hot Seat.

They're literally Hot Seats in Vegas. Hot commodities. We talk about them a little bit with Pete at the end, but Allegiant Stadium has unveiled what their indoor seating capacity is going to look like. They're going to have a straight up club in the end zone. I saw that. There's going to be a DJ setup.

There's going to be bottle service. It's going to be, I think it, is it going to be lit? It's going to be so lit. Litty. Well, I think they think it's going to be lit. I'm excited to see what the personnel of people that actually go are. What does that mean?

I hope it's like older guy. You know what I mean? I think they're expecting club going people to go. It's going to be true religion jean wearers. But it's going to be more, you know, older football fanatic rich raider fans. I hope, maybe not. I would love to see the black hole in that club,

like wearing the gorilla suits. I want to see Pete Prisco and us in those seats. Not actually like club going, you know, hot people. I actually think that we should go for content. Sure, we should go to the game for content. And I think that we should get maybe strippers. But for content, just to be like, hey, this is the biggest Vegas type party

that we can have in the end zone for content show up with. You think Mark Davis is going to be a go-go dancer? Well, Wednesday is tomorrow. Today, as you're listening to this schedule release. Yes. So we'll pick them up in a football game. Hell, yeah. Schedule release day is one of my favorite days. But this year is going to be a little bit different

because of 17 because there's 17 games. So like it's always we're going 10 and six. So do you think it's going to be we're going 11 and six? Or do you think people are going to be like, we're going 10 and seven? The there also is not going to be a doubleheader. Monday of football week one sucks so bad news about the Bears. What Sunday of football week one against the Rams. Really? Yeah.

Why would they do that? For ratings for part of my take. To help our show. Andy Dalton. Menacing to start Andy Dalton. So I think like if we can take a real quick detour into Bears quarterback talk, I think that there's a good chance Justin Fields starts week one.

I do too. I hope so. I think then again, they're doing the thing where they say like Andy's a guy and we want Justin Fields to learn behind a veteran. No, yeah. And then after like two practices, it's going to be like Justin Fields is clearly superior. I want Justin Fields start week one. Absolutely. No ifs ands or buts.

I do not want to. No offense, Andy Dalton, nice guy. I don't want to especially Sunday of football now. Come on, come on. Just a couple of things I'm looking for in the schedule. I want I need the Jaguars Titans to play that would be nice. Would be nice. It would really just be nice.

And then besides that, I really I just like seeing exciting teams in prime time like everybody else. I don't want to see Cowboys Giants playing a prime time game this year. That would honestly make my week. Yes. Yes. All right. Your cool throne. My cool throne is well, it's kind of like a I don't know if I should bring this up, but the early 2000s.

Ben Affleck back together. Well, actually, funny, funny, you bring that up. PFT. That's my hot seat because Ben Affleck was tampering. Ben Affleck, it was reported was texting JLo in February when JLo and Erod were still engaged. That is illegal. That is tampering. Lock him up.

Lock him up. Lock him up. I lock him. Jake, help me. Lock him up. Fuck, Jake, yourself with me, too. Have you seen Jiggly? It's wonderful.

Pronounce Jeeley. It's wonderful. I actually don't know. It's a great movie. I hope they do a sequel. Tampering, tampering, tampering. You can't do that. Bro code.

Guy code. Come on. Yeah, but he's dude. Ben Affleck's a Boston guy. Don't fucking fly. Go fuck Naveen or whatever. The Czech who blew him up. That was such an awesome video.

And that said, A-Rod would never, ever, ever cheat. I was going to say text somebody who was in a relationship, first and foremost, or cheat. So these Boston, New York, the water's run deep. Tampering. I'm sad. All right. That was my hot seat.

That was your cool throne. Well, just the early 2000 general, because we also got Chris Berman back on the ESPN. Happy birthday yesterday. Yeah, happy birthday. Well, it was his birthday when they announced the contract. I think so, yeah. Good job, Chris.

Yeah, great job. Kenny Maine's gone, though. That sucks. Yeah. We'll hire him. My cool throne is Prego pasta sauce, because that video that went viral of that chick just dumping all of the pasta sauce and spaghetti

and meatballs on the countertop. I think that's what she does, though. That chick knows what she's doing. I know it's so funny. She did it with nachos. She's made the ice cream cone out of nachos. And people get so mad about it, every time. People just so mad.

People love to get mad about food online. It's their favorite activity to do. Also, that's the suburban mom version of a cocaine party. Just a lot of spaghetti sauce. Yeah, just on the countertop. Yeah, I would say white wine. She had done that. They should have had ice lures for white wines

that are up next to mom. Hilarious video and also just very funny. Those are the videos that just tells you, are people just taking everything online way too seriously? That was just a fucking ridiculous troll video. The answer is yes, they are. They are, they're getting very upset. A lot of people think I actually drink mayonnaise eggnog.

You do. That's beside the point. I put it up there as a troll, which I also happened to enjoy. But it was just a troll. Right, it was just a joke. It's a prank. Learn a prank, folks. Jake, the alpha in the room.

How's it going? Any update? Can I get you anything? We've got $51 in the quest to get Hank a new butt. That's it? Yeah, $51. I don't think we will know how to use the Twitter tips thing. And I googled how much it would cost to get butt implants.

Yeah, it's about five grand. OK, we're not really there, but yeah. We can go cheek by cheek though. This gets a $2,500. Top of the left cheek. Left one first. Yeah. Hank, there was a rumor that you made up a doctor's appointment

yesterday. As soon as Jake showed up, you just left the office. No, I mean, I said on Sunday I was feeling under the weather. So he walked in and you just got up from your desk and walked out? No, I mean, listen, the people are really, really reaching for conclusions. I said I'm on the record saying I was feeling under the weather. I went and got my third vaccine shot yesterday.

Just wanted to make sure. Yeah, top you off. So yeah. Sorry for being safe. Sorry for being safe. Make sure you watch Stool Streams on Thursday. The Jake doing his great job as an announcer went to interview Dave and Dave made Tommy stand as security guard

in case Jake got aggressive with him. It's smart. It is very smart. Jake, it's like that tiger that was on the loose in Houston. That's basically what we have prowling the office for you, Jake. I'm scared. I'm scared. People ask for shirts.

I think they're coming. Passive. I'm the best one here. That's what the shirt going to say? No. What's it going to say? Best in the office. I'm the best one here.

Should be it. I'm not going to make any suggestions. No, do it. No, no, no. No, sorry. Do it. Do it. What should it be, Hank?

No. You guys are smart, guys. You'll figure it out. Should it be the step over? No, it's copyright. Hank getting stepped over? It's copyrighted. Yeah, yeah.

What's your suggestion? Don't you worry about it, Jake. All right, Jake, what's your hot seat cool to run? Hot seat is flopping. In college hoops, they are going to now assess the technical if you are caught flopping instead of a warning. That's going to be fun to decipher. Yeah, that sounds like a hornet's nest, honestly.

Plus, I don't have any faith in it actually being upheld because college reps love to call charges. These are favorite things to do. That's recommended from the NCAA rules committee. So it's not official, but it's in that way. That could get it ugly. What does that mean for the zone? Is that good or bad for the zone?

What does that mean for Brad Davidson's seventh year? Good point. That's really what I'm thinking about, OK? Then cool thrown is Jay Cole. He is playing in the Rwandan Club basketball Africa League. Ooh. So taking his talents to Africa. Maybe we can get him in slam ball.

Yeah, which is coming up or if he's coming up. Yeah, so listen. Remember when didn't Master P almost make the Raptors? I feel like he, yeah, he tried out, right? Did he almost make it? I think if you just, if you can just get one picture of you in the jersey, like in the practice, you basically made the team.

Nellie had it right. Nellie would just show up to all the rockin' jocks on MTV and just dominate no matter what sport it was. It's like Nellie was always the king of all the celebrities out there. Maybe that was, I mean, we're going to talk about T-Bow right now with Pete Prisco, but maybe that's just all he wanted to do, get another jersey on,

have everyone be like, oh yeah, he was on that team. That's actually genius. All right, let's get to Pete Prisco. We're gonna do Pete Prisco. Then we have the creator of slam ball. Awesome interview with him before we get to Pete Prisco. Quick word, you know I love coffee, black rifle coffee. Company is a veteran owned coffee company serving premium

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Okay, we now welcome on our good friend. It is Pete Prisco. You can find him on CBS. He's a senior NFL columnist for cbssports.com. It says it in his Twitter which most of the people listening right now are probably blocked but we have Pete on because Tim Tebow has signed with the Jacksonville Jaguars.

Pete covered Tim Tebow at Florida. He lives in Jacksonville, he covers the Jaguars. He's a huge Tim Tebow fan. He's a huge Tim Tebow fan and I looked for just some stats beforehand, Pete. Tim Tebow got signed less than 24 hours ago. Pete Prisco has tweeted about Tim Tebow 40 plus times since that so we thought who better to have on

to talk about Tim Tebow than Pete Prisco so let's do it, let's do it. What's up fellas? By the way, I don't live in Jacksonville anymore. I moved to South Florida. Same thing. I'm still on the Jaguars radio network so this is an interesting signing

and it's a stupid signing and I will absolutely say that this is a big joke because he can't play. He couldn't play quarterback. He was a terrible quarterback. He hasn't played since 2012. He's gonna be 34 years old and he has no suddenness to his game.

He can't play tight end. He will not be able to make the transition. So it seems to me though that the transition to the tight end position eliminates his biggest weakness which is throwing the ball. And he is a good runner. Like he's not bad in space, right? He never made anybody miss.

He was always one of those guys that tried to run over people. He's not gonna run over anybody from the tight end position. He gotta be able to get open. You think he's gonna get open? I don't know if you saw the tweet yesterday I sent out too about when he was on the punt.

I went back and looked at his punt protection plays and he was getting mauled as a blocker. They were running over. He can't block. He's definitely gonna have a target on him. Like Tim Tebow is gonna be a guy that other players are gonna love to hit. Absolutely love to knock out.

I actually agree with you. I don't think that he'll be a good tight end. I think he's just gonna be camp fodder. I think he's like, was it a 90 man roster right now? Yeah, but you know what else is interesting about this is when they say, oh, well he's gonna be a leader when he gets in there. Those players are all gonna follow.

Nobody follows a stiff, you follow good players. You hate Tim Tebow. I actually, I agree with everything you're saying. Why though, then did the Jaguars do this? As a favor for Urban Meyer. I mean, that has to be what it is. His buddy, he knows him. He played for him.

He won titles for him. He was a big part of his life. And Tebow lives in Jacksonville still. So he probably said, hey, come on over. We'll give you a workout. He probably looked okay in the workout because he's in great shape, but he's not gonna be able to play tight end in the league.

And I just don't understand it. All the goodwill that they've built up in the last three months or four months. You know, think about it. That franchise has been beat the hell since it came into the league. You get a coach like Urban Meyer. You get a quarterback like Trevor Lawrence.

And now you bring in Tebow. And all that does is it kills all the goodwill that you've had in the last couple of months. Okay. Counterpoint. Counterpoint. And I do agree that Tebow's not, you know, it's all just a circus act at this point. But counterpoint.

Urban Meyer has forgotten more football than you ever knew. True. I don't think there's any doubt about that. It doesn't mean they don't make mistakes. It doesn't mean they don't make mistakes. They all make mistakes. But what if you see something you don't know? What if he's got something that you don't know

and he's got some kind of plan in place for Tim Tebow that you can't figure out? Will you at least apologize then? Oh, I will say I'm wrong. I've said I'm wrong before. I get, look, I said Christian Ponder would be better than Cam Newton. I was wrong.

I just say I'm wrong. Thanks. Maybe the worst quarterback ever drafted. Oh, he was terrible. Oh, terrible. Terrible. So bad. Really disgusting individual.

But here's the thing about the Tebow stuff is sell tickets. If you draft Trevor Lawrence, you're going to be a good team. You're going to sell tickets. Trevor Lawrence, if you can take them off the field, can you imagine if they take them off the field to put that gimmicky crap in on the goal line? Trevor Lawrence moves better than Tim Tebow does.

Why would you do that? I don't know. Counter-counterpoint to what Big Cat said. Yeah, it's a circus act, but circuses are fun. People go to circuses. Good point. I like watching circuses. So at the end of the day,

it's probably a net benefit to have people talking about the Jaguars, right? You probably go to the circus to watch Ellen take a dump in front of everybody. That's probably why you go to the circus. I don't know what that means, but yeah, I would. You've never been in a circus with the elephant one fine. He takes a big giant dump in front of everybody.

What do you go for? The clowns? I go for somebody stepping in his dump. I like the Tigers. I like the Tigers. This is NFL football. Yeah, this is not NFL football. This is a joke.

And here's the other thing. Somebody, and I can't remember who said it on Twitter. It might have been Jeff Legwald, who I have great, I've known Jeff for years, but he said he was around when Tebow was in Denver, he covered that thing. It takes away some of the pressure off of, it might take away some of the pressure off of Trevor Lawrence.

True. And then we focus, well, if you, if you draft in Trevor Lawrence first overall and he can't handle the pressure, then you drafted the role. Wait, wait, but there's two things at play here. We're not saying he can't, and now I'm arguing for Tim Tebow,

which I hate that I'm doing this. Let's go. We, the argument would not be that Trevor Lawrence can't handle the pressure. The argument is, can you make Trevor Lawrence's job even a little bit easier? And if the answer is yes, why wouldn't you do that? How does it make his job easier?

Cause everyone's gonna be talking about Tim Tebow. I don't, for about a week. Listen, all right, here's, here's what, here's, I'm gonna give you a little hypothetical. Week one, Trevor Lawrence throws three interceptions. Tim Tebow gets blown up on punt return coverage and they block a punt. Pete Prisco, was it senior NFL columnist?

What will he be? Senior as an old. Yeah, what will he be tweeting about? Tim Tebow or Trevor Lawrence's poor performance? Poor performance. That's a lie. That's a lie. You did see 45 tweets about Tim Tebow. If you drafted, if you drafted the guy

in the first pick overall and he throws three interceptions in his first game, you're gonna be killing him. Let's be real. You guys would be too. You would be talking about this stiff punt protect. No, we're not in the first game. We would just talk about how his long hair is bad for the quarterback position.

But what if, okay, what about this, Pete? What if they're bringing Tim Tebow in because you know the old saying, the only way that you can truly master a skill is to teach it to somebody else? What if Trevor Lawrence, one of his assignments is like, teach Tim Tebow to throw for greater than 45% completion percentage.

And by then teaching Tim Tebow, Trevor Lawrence has become a better quarterback. Yeah, I think you're reaching for something here. Can Trevor Lawrence teach him not to throw like this? I mean, that's hard to do. You can't teach that. Okay, what about this, Pete Prisco, senior NFL columnist? What about Urban Meyer understanding the importance

of having a Heisman Trophy winner on the roster? Something Trevor Lawrence did not do. Nobody gives a crap about your college trophies. I do. I bet on Trevor Lawrence to win the Heisman. He didn't win it. Well, does he now that impacted your life? No, but you said nobody, nobody cares about it.

I can't. Nobody in the locker room cares about your college trophies. I gotta get in the locker room. Nobody's playing, nobody who's playing with him cares about his college trophies. Nobody does. And they don't care about your religion. They don't care about anything else.

Just line up and play and show to me that you could be a productive player and help me win games, period. End of story. So is there any chance Tim Tebow makes a roster? Zero percent chance? Zero. Zero.

Zero. That's a low number. None. Okay. I'd go even lower if I could. Pete, you have to eat your column. No, no, no, no, no, no. That's because that's a guarantee.

That's a Prisco guarantee. I got something better. If Tim Tebow makes the roster, PFT and I both get to nut-tap you. No, I'm not letting anybody do that. Why? Because you kill over and you can't breathe. I saw you in the video.

What are you two doing to each other? That was a long time ago. Pete makes the claim three years ago. So our mutual friend, Will Branson, tip me off to this. Pete makes the claim that he never has been nut-tapped or nut-tapped anyone, which leads me to believe you have no friends.

No, I have friends. We just didn't nut-tap each other. I'm not touching you. I don't want to go down there. I don't want to hit you there. A, and B, if you hit me there, I'd probably chase you around the school. It honestly sounds homophobic.

Yeah. No, it's actually, I just don't want you to, oh, I touched another man's penis. Oh, I hope nobody thinks I'm gay. You're hitting him. It's the straightest thing you can do. Hit him in the mouth. Okay, so wait, Pete, I think actually,

I think it's because you actually would be great at nut-tapping though, you realize that. Like, you're so short that no one would be able to hit your balls. I'm older than I might be able to hit my balls. They want with their foot? Yeah, they'll kick at my ankle when you get them. All right, Pete, what about this?

It is funny how people do treat Tim Tebow like he's America's little special boy and that he can do anything. Like, if Tim Tebow wants to play baseball, he can play baseball. If you want to be president, Tim, sure, you're America's special little dude. You can do whatever you set your mind to.

What about the fact that it's a testament that you can do anything that you want in terms of your goals, as long as you have like a hard work ethic, a clean conscience, and a shitload of dirt on Urban Meyer for all the stuff that he swept under the rug when he was a head coach at Florida? Now you're talking,

now I think you might be on this up. That's the reason, right? Yeah. He's got all the details and all the dirt on everything that went on there. Maybe, that could be. You never know, but you know what? Tebow's not the kind of guy

that's going to let that out anyways. He, you know how he is. It was in the locker room. I'm not telling anybody. He's not telling anybody that. I don't, look, you can't, your dreams are great. You thought you could play baseball, you couldn't. Couldn't hit.

You thought you could play quarterback, you couldn't. You couldn't throw. Now you think you're going to play tight end and you have no suddenness. Just get along with your life. You're doing a good, you're on TV. You do good things in the community. You do stuff.

You used to go on missions to the Philippines and do circumcision back in the day. That's basically the same thing as a nut tap. Yeah. Only now those kids are about 19, they're about 19 and they're waking up going, oh my gosh, what happened to him? Yeah.

I wish he was, I wish he was an NFL player. Look, his accuracy was better at that than it was at throwing it. You, so I agree with everything you're saying. I think it's just a joke. I also think Tim Tebow, like there's a little element of, he loves the spotlight and he loves just like being in the conversation when it's not realistic.

It's not realistic. He was going to make MLB. It's not realistic. He's going to make the Jaguars. I get it. It is like there is a circus aspect, but maybe just don't get so upset. Like you had 45 tweets.

Well, I had seven years when I did drive time radio in Jacksonville, when he was at his heyday and it was gold for seven years. And I'm telling you, I had people calling in, I'm coming to the studio, I'm kicking your ass. I'm going to be waiting outside for you. And his father called me off air a couple of times cause I mocked being homeschooled

and being daddy on the practice field and everything else. So I had, believe me, I had seven years of that. And it was amazing to watch. And then one day I went to a golf tournament and Mark Brunel put me in the golf cart with his dad for 18. Oh my gosh. Yeah, it was Timmy this, Timmy that, Timmy this,

Timmy that, Timmy this and I'm, yes. And he said, it was draft, it was draft week. And he said, where do you think he's going to get drafted? I go, I don't know. Second round. He goes, where do you think he should get drafted? I go six or seven. I told him. But, but, but let's just at least say this.

Tim Tebow is one of the greatest college football players of all time. No question. Okay. No doubt. Nobody could take that away from him. Just like you guys, you remember Danny Whirlpool, remember how great he was as a college quarterback? Yes.

He couldn't play in the league. Yeah. He could not play in the league. Yeah. Go ahead. I was just going to say, when it comes to Tebow and Jackson, when you were there, there's a bunch of pictures from that one rally that they had outside the stadium where it was the like

Tebow to the Jaguars. Why not? I think that's what the name of the entire movement was because the Jags were so bad at the time. They're, this is pre Blake Bortles, by the way. So it's like before the golden era and they were just like, why not? What's the worst thing that can happen?

There was like a plane that flew overhead with a banner saying, please sign Tim Tebow. You were out there with the Tebow lovers and you were wearing the Jorts. That's where those pictures came from. They weren't Jorts. Yeah, they were. They're the Jorts that you can fit an iPad into with the

giant pockets on them. They had a pocket, but I told you before those were not Jorts. I've never worn Jorts ever. I promise you. They were not Jorts. There's photographic evidence. What were they? They were like fishing shorts is exactly what they were.

And were you fishing? No, I was walking into the building. Did you get a chance? Have you ever met Tim Tebow? Briefly. How'd that go? Hello, nice of these. I mean, look, I'm nice.

I'm not going to be mean to him. He's not going to be mean to me. You're not nice. All right, wait. I am nice. I know you're not. That's why we love you. Let's talk about, I want to talk about two other things

in the league real quick. Aaron Rodgers. Is he going to be on the Green Bay Packers Week 1? He will be. They're dug in. And they should be dug in. Why would you trade him? Why?

Because he doesn't want to be there? Look, I love Aaron Rodgers. I think he's a great player. He had a wonderful season. But you signed a contract. A, yes, you want more money. If they offer you to make you the highest paid player in the league, which I think they're willing to do,

at least in terms of the structure of the contract, then why not sign it and go play? What's your end game? Where do you want to go? What's the best case scenario for you? He's not going to the 49ers now. He's not going to the Rams or the Chargers. So where's he going?

The Raiders? Is that a better situation for him? No, it's not. The Broncos? Maybe. But do you want to be in Denver? I just don't think he's thinking this out. Why?

Because they cut Jake Kumaro? A quarterback shouldn't have any input into who's being cut and who's not being cut. They're his buddies. When you cut your buddies, you cut. Look, they go. Guys are going to go. He should not have the input on that.

He will play for the pack. Why do you think that he doesn't want to be in Denver, even though he says that he does? No, I don't think that he doesn't want to be in Denver. I'm just saying, is that a much better situation than Green Bay? No, probably not. I think he's just in the mindset of he would rather

be somewhere else than where he is right now. So it's like the lesser of two evils. Or the devil you don't want. Why? Nobody is, everybody's in agreement that Jordan Love is a terrible pick. Terrible pick. If Aaron Rodgers plays at an MVP level for the next three

years, and he told me once he wants to play until he's 40, if he does that, then Jordan Love is a terrible pick. And we all thought it was. But cast that aside. What else don't you like? You played an entire season there. You won an MVP. You were in a whisker going to the Super Bowl.

What is bothering you? Speak up. Tell us what it is. Is it the GM? Nobody has to get along with the GM. Guys don't really talk to the general manager much when you're walking through the hallways. Hey, how you doing?

You don't have to interact with him. You have to get along with your coaches. And so what's his end game? I don't get it. Why is he angry at the organization? For the love pick, I get it. For other stuff, you played a whole year after the love pick. What about your relationship with Mike Florio right now?

Because Florio thought that it was totally Bush League for Aaron Rodgers to be going after the GM's job. He said that was like the one line that you don't cross in the league. I'd never heard that before, but I'm curious to know if you agree with your best friend, Mike or not. Look, Mike's right on that one.

I don't think these guys should be good. Quarterbacks should not be making decisions as it relates to personnel and who should be hired. I said that all along with Deshaun Watson. I said to Deshaun Watson signed a contract in October with the same team he's complaining about and then he won it out. Well, you can't have it both ways.

What do you want? What is your end game? You don't trade franchise quarterbacks. I don't care how unhappy they are. The one guy who has a legitimate gripe and beef is Russell Wilson in large part because of the way they play. He should be thrown the ball all over the place. They want to run the ball.

So he can complain about that, but he shouldn't be complained about who's making the decisions and what the decisions are being made. Okay, next question that I had for you, the draft. Who had of the five quarterbacks taken in the first round, who do you think has the best fit and what was the pick that you liked the most?

Of the quarterbacks, I liked the Bears getting field. I think that was a setup. Thank God, okay. I love Justin Fields. Lawrence is the clear one. Justin Fields in my mind is the two. And all the lead up to the draft picking apart, I didn't get it.

He's accurate, he's smart, he's tough, he's athletic, he's big, he will be a darn good quarterback. The Bears haven't had one since Sid Luckman. They finally have one. And we should just throw this out there. It has nothing to do with the fact that you just complimented the Bears and Justin Fields. But you do watch the tape, correct?

All of them, every one of them. I knew that about you. I liked Lawrence won him too, Wilson three, and then probably Mack Jones. And I think Trey Lance is a project and people will kill me for that. I would have taken him in the first round. I would not have given up two first round picks

to go up and take him. He's raw, he needs a lot of seasoning. He's got a weird mechanics. There's a chance he can be good, but it's gonna take a little time. What about Zach Wilson? Because it was kind of weird. We didn't really talk about that much

leading up to the draft, but in the last six months, it just became an accepted fact that Zach Wilson was gonna go to the Jets. And we saw some of the stuff at his pro day where he made that one throw across his body, like 70 yards down the field. But as a guy that watches the film, what did you see from him

that would either justify him going that high? Or do you think they reached on him? No, I don't think they reached on him. Again, I would have taken Fields, but he's a gunslinger. If you want a gunslinger, a guy who's gonna rip it, take chances and throw it in a tight windows, take him. My concern with him is he's little.

Look, and I'm not talking about a height. I'm talking about his body, his frame, and he's been injured a couple of times already. That's always a concern. So that's my biggest concern with him. But if you want to see a guy rip it and throw it in a tight windows, I get it. He also didn't play great competition.

And remember when Josh Allen came out, that was the knock on Josh Allen. He didn't play against great competition. He's dispelled that notion. And I think he was the best quarterback in that class. I said it all along. I still believe that. But Jack Wilson has to do some proving

to make people believe that. What about the fact that he wasn't a captain at BYU? Does that concern you? No, I think, you know what, you guys played sports. You've been around sports. The raw raw captain guy. Why do you want to be that guy anyway? Raw raw.

It's kind of weird though. You know, is that guy Tebow? Tim Tebow, yeah, it sounds like you really have a type and it's not the guy that is the traditional leader. You don't like leaders. You like a team that's just a bunch of followers, Pete. No, I like a team that's a bunch of self starters. Do it yourself.

You don't need somebody in your ear telling you what to do. Go do it. You know, you got to knock the snot out of the guy across from you. Go knock the snot out of him. I don't need the guy next to me telling me what to do. Nor would you guys.

I wouldn't think knowing you guys away. I don't think you're like that. No. Unless one of you might be a follower. Who's the follower? No, we're not. We're both self starters. Hank follows Jake.

Yeah, Jake, yeah. Mostly. But seriously, does that not... It is kind of weird for a quarterback who's that good, who's going to get drafted number two overall, the face of your program at the time of BYU, to not be elected a captain by his teammates.

That's kind of strange. You got to remember though, leading into that season, it wasn't exactly seen as a top quarterback either. There was some talk that he was just a guy and maybe they didn't think he was a guy that was worth being nominated for captain. Coughlin' back in the day and guys,

I know these are draft guys based on being captains. I never believe that. I just don't buy into that. Wait, so can you become a guy overnight then? You can. I mean, it takes work, but he worked at it. I get credit. You see what he did?

He drove back and forth to California and worked with his quarterback coach in the off season. You can make yourself into a good player. Look, Mac Jones, Joe Burrow, they were two guys that made themselves into good players and came out of nowhere. It'll probably happen again next year. That's just the nature of the position.

Do you think that Trey Lance is gonna be relied upon to do a lot of the stuff that RG3 was doing when he was a rookie in Washington? Because it's Kyle Shanahan who really kind of brought the read option to the game, which I know you hated that year. You hated RG3. You hated Russell Wilson.

You hated any guy that ran with a football. You're like, this isn't quarterback. It's gonna, the pendulum's gonna swing back eventually. It's a fad. But I feel like Kyle Shanahan is gonna bring back the read option big time with Trey Lance. I don't think he's gonna bring back the read option. He'll put more runs into it.

What he's gonna bring back is the ability of the quarterback to run and help create space, which is what the game has become. Look, I was one of the first guys, you know me, I criticized that read option garbage. I hated it. But the way these guys move around now and run with the spread offenses, that's fine.

I get it. I understand that. Everybody throws on the move. The only guy who doesn't is Brady. The guys that don't move are few and far between anymore because you have to move because the defenses are so fast and so athletic. All right, last question. What's the block total up to on your Twitter now?

You know, I had a lot yesterday. Yeah. Can you look it up? Can you look it up? I don't think you, I don't think you can. Yeah, you can. It tells you how many counts you have blocked. Yeah.

Go on your phone. Go on your phone. You wanna do an over under? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna say. I think you've got 540 people blocked on Twitter. Oh, I think he's got 2,000. Okay, where do you find the block?

Right, let me see. You see, pull up your phone. I think it's under privacy. I'm checking mine right now. Profile maybe? Are you on privacy? Oh, there it is. What'd you say the over under was?

I said 2,000. PFT said 500. 540. You're both taking the under in 2,360. Oh my God. That's amazing. You weren't even close, PFT, you weren't even close. Yeah, I don't know what got into me,

but like one thing that I really enjoy about you is you tell people when you're blocking them. Maybe not every time, but frequently you'll be like, see ya. You get a little creative sometimes with the see ya. Like some reverend said something to me once that I said, here, I got something for your collection basket for Sunday.

It's a see ya, and I threw him out there. So I try and get a little creative with him. But if you get really nasty, most of the time I won't block you unless you go to real nasty. Can we have you on? Well, that's just not true. 2,316 people disagree. That's how many people are nasty, they're nasty.

Can we get you to unblock one person? Who's that? I don't know, just one person. Maybe the first person that tweets at Jake after the episode comes out. And we'll text you. When you hear the sound of my voice, tweet at Jake and say, Pete, unblock me.

Okay, now that you've picked apart me, I got something to pick apart with you people. Hey, stop with it. I'm on pellet time. We're in a group racing thing. Whoa, look at me. I beat you. I beat you today.

Woo, hey guys, jump on. We're in a race and so, come on. Okay, during the pandemic I get it. Yeah. Couldn't do much, but enough is enough. Well, I haven't done it since like maybe August. So since football season started. What'd you do?

You made it a coat rack? You just got fat, yeah. Basically, it just sits in my corner, it collects dust. I get on there like once a month, but I just don't have the time or really the desire. Okay, so you were a pandemic guy that got into it. There was literally no other way that I could exercise for a little bit in New York.

And then it just, it was partially I got sick of it. And then partially I got sick of the other types of people that were on Twitter all the time, posting their Peloton scores. And I was like, I cannot be involved in this anymore. Thank you. Thank you. So I don't, you got your wish, Pete.

Now you got a $3,000 coat rack. Exactly. Yeah. It's perfect. I got one last, last question for you. What about this idea for Tim Tebow? He's a lucky guy. Like there's, it's undeniable everywhere he goes,

there always seems to be like one or two things extremely lucky that happened to him. He'll like save somebody's life by hitting a foul ball into them when they're choking on a hot dog in triple A. He's like, save people's lives on airplanes. Why don't- The Tush shouts into Marius Thomas. Tush shouts into Marius Thomas.

He's got a horse who's shoved up his ass. What if you brought him in as a coin toss specialist? Where he just called the toss every game. Now that might be a good plan for him. I think that might work. That's a skill set. I'd be okay with that. Yeah, that's a skill set.

Cause you're right. He's a little bit lucky. He's had a nice, and some people will say he earned the luck. You know, you got to work to get the luck, but that might be a good job for him. But coach, somebody said coach, leadership council, nobody wants to hear that garbage. Nobody.

If you can't play, you don't listen. Nobody listens. Do you guys listen to people that aren't productive in your business and your job? You don't. Of course not. If you have a lazy ass that works at Barstool and he comes over to you and says,

hey guys, today's the day we're going to do this. And you look at him and you go, get the hell out of here. I don't need to listen to you. Yeah, literally get the hell out of here for a month. Of course. Of course. By the way, there's no weight on that over back behind you. You got anything on there?

You don't know about lifting weights. See, you should not have brought up the bench press because I haven't thought about this for years. But you remember the time when you posted how much you benched online one time? And it was a picture. You were at the gym and you had a plate on each side and then you put a five pound plate on both sides of it.

So you got your total up to like 145. And I have never seen anybody seriously use a five pound plate at the gym except for you before. A, back in the day, don't do it anymore because I'm old and my joints, I can't take it. I used to do 325, so don't go there and be. You got short arms. Here he goes.

He's got short arms. It's always the tall guy that yells out the short arms. But you're right, I do. But I don't do that. I don't lift heavy like that anymore. No way. It's too bad. It kills your joints.

But what about the five pound accusation? I mean, OK, if I want to go up from three plates on each side and maybe try a five pound on each side, I would do that. I've done that. I don't think it was three plates on each side at the time. This is like five years ago. And you actually said, you told me I don't lift heavy anymore. It was a warm up.

I might have been a warm up. I don't lift heavy anymore. But I can still go to 225, five pounds. Easy. Pete, you remind me of all sorts of stuff in our past. We still haven't done the push-up contest. No, because you wanted to drink every time we did it. Yeah, it's true.

It's a fact. Yeah. I bet you've cut down on your drinking. I have. I've had to. Yeah, I got kidney stones now. You know what else? Two-year-old.

We get older, man. You can't recover. You can't recover. 30 is just a number. I mean, this guy, every Saturday, he can stone us. He's like he's got a pot of gold at the end of the race. Yeah, you like that. I eat.

I don't drink my calories. I eat them. I don't know why. Yeah. I'm in exactly the same way. Yeah. All right, Pete. Always fun to catch up with you.

We appreciate it. And we'll talk soon. You miss me. I do. I miss you. I think you're fine. You cracked me up. You cracked me up.

Well, maybe one day when we're all out, out again, we can see John again somewhere. Perfect. Yes. Perfect. You know what we should do, Pete? We should go to Vegas together. We should go to the Allegiant Stadium when it opens up

and hit the club. I would love to go to the club. That would be fun. Bring your finest pair of cargo shorts. Yeah. No. What a hawkasson. Now they're cargo shorts.

And before, they were jorts. So now you've got to go to the mall. They're jorts. They're absolutely jorts. But they were not jorts. We'll go to the stadium. And they've got a club set up in the stadium. We'll get bottle service.

That would be a familiar. Yeah, we'll take some ecstasy. It'll be sick. Like the old days. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. That's joke. That's joke.

That's joke for Pete. All right. Thanks, Pete. All right, guys. All right. See you, buddy. And now for something completely different. OK, we now welcome on a very special guest.

It is Mason Gordon. And you're probably saying to yourself, might not know that name off the top of my head. Well, you should, because he is the inventor of slam ball, a game that electrified the nation, a game that I think will get into all of it, is still around and we need to revive. But this is awesome.

We were just talking real quick before we started that we remember slam ball. And having it be just incredible for people who don't know. Let's actually just do that. For people who don't know what slam ball is, can you give us the quick, how it started, what it looked like, and then we'll pick up from there? Yeah, absolutely.

In putting slam ball together, I really looked at UFC as this new combination of different pugilistic styles. So if you took all these different martial arts and threw it into a blender, you could create something new. Well, I love team sports. I grew up with team sports. So my whole thing was, how could I

take the best aspects of football, basketball, hockey, and throw them into a blender and add in a little bit of a video game mentality, because that was my other great love. And then it turned into something completely new, and that was slam ball. So if you see bits of slam ball on the internet, see old games and things like that, a lot of people say it looks like a real life version of NBA

Jam or 2K cages or something along those lines. It's actually a game that's played full contact, hockey style substitutions, four on four, on a spring-loaded surface to where the floor is actually got springs underneath it, and then you're attacking these spring beds or competition Olympic trampolines that launch you up to 17 feet in the air where you joust with the defender high above the rim

and try to slam the ball through. So it's taken on this kind of mythic quality over the years. And it's something that's really been kept alive through the fandom on the internet. Yeah, it honestly sounds like something an insane seven-year-old would come up with in his backyard. It sounds like the old rules that you would have on a trampoline, you basically just

toss some balls out there and then kind of invent it as you go along. But slam ball kind of turned it into an organized sport. When you were coming up with it, did you have trouble figuring out who the first people were that were going to be the guinea pigs to get out there and try this out? Or were you like, you know what? I'm inventing it.

I'm going to be one of the first ones out of the court. Well, I was obsessed with dunking, right? Like there's a whole story I'll tell you guys sometime about. No, tell it now. Tell it now. Well, I almost died the first time I dunked a basketball. Literally this is true. I was 15 years old.

I got invited by a couple of my friends who are African-American to come play basketball at a court in Jacksonville, Florida, a place called University Park. So I went out there and it was July 4th. There's all kinds of people all around. And I'm getting into this pretty intense game. I'm the only white guy there. My black friends neglected to mention

that I'd be the only white guy within 10 miles. So I'm playing in this game. And this guy is just he's definitely giving me work on the block and stuff and hitting all these crazy shots. And every time he does, he's like, yeah, take that white boy. Yeah, white boy. Yeah, white boy.

And so I'm just trying to play the game. I'm trying to do as best I can. And I remember I catch a rebound. I pass it to my friend Vernon on the right side. He passes it to Jeff on the left side. And he shovels me the ball. And I had the ball in the middle. And I never even thought about dunking the ball before.

But there was this guy who'd been talking shit to me all day. And he's just sitting there under the rim. So I just jumped as high as I could and he jumped. And it was like a Tom Chambers thing where my knee went into his chest. And I went up higher than I probably could have jumped. And I just smashed it as hard as I possibly could. And everybody lost their mind.

They're like, oh, oh, you got dunked on all this stuff. So he like, so I kind of like said, muttered something to him. And he was like, oh, yeah, oh, yeah. And he like walked away. And so everybody was kind of patting me on the back. And then he came back with a bunch of like guys and like white, crisp white t-shirts.

And it looked really, really menacing. So Vernon and Jeff were like, you know, what did you say to him? And I said, I said, take that black boy. And he was like, I was like, what? White boy, black boy, it's a proportionate response. Right? You know, get the fuck out of here now.

So I just went running for my car because these dudes were coming after me. And I managed to get to the car. The guy was behind me. He was trying to hold my door open. And well, I heard gunshots. I thought somebody shot me. And it was actually like an off-duty police officer

who came over from one of the barbecue pits. And he was just like, I was like, hey, thank you officer. And the officer was just like, go, go, yes. Yeah. So I spent like most of my life just being obsessed with dunking. Dunking had this like crazy outsize, like emotional like component for me.

So I worked really hard to be able to dunk. And I would, I got to where I could really do it legitimately. And I would just go from court to court to find people who didn't know me where I could try to like sneak in a facial here and there. Right? So I really, I wasn't a great basketball player by any means, but I knew about dunking.

I was sort of fascinated by it. And I had these dreams about like kind of, two players going up in the air, and there was like a crazy collision. And then like they fell out of frame. And I was like, it was always different. Like it was always kind of exciting. So I knew the kind of players that I wanted

when I set out to create slam ball. I wanted to create that, that dream in reality and kind of like take the aesthetics of NBA Jam, NFL Blitz and bring it into real life, a real flesh and blood sport, right? So I think that I, that idea was really kind of exciting. And so I was always looking for that guy, you know, on your favorite basketball team,

there's like that eighth guy, you know, coming off the bench is the freakish, most freakish athlete there is. And you're like, why can't he hit a 19 foot jump shot and stay on the court, right? But he's so exciting. He's got so much God given athletic ability. And my idea was like,

I want to create a league full of those guys, guys that their first, their first thought, second thought and third thought was to attack the rim and make something exciting happen. And then everything else would be kind of a specialist adjunct to that idea. So that, I mean, that's incredible that it all comes, I understand it comes from dunking

because if you watch one second of slam ball, that's where all the action is. It's at the rim, guys flying in the air. So you come up with this idea and it was crazy how quickly it feels like it went from an idea that you came up with to being actually a league on TV, on Spike TV, were you surprised how fast that happened? Or were you like, did people just hear your pitch

and like, yeah, this makes sense. This will be fun. Let's do it. Yeah, well, I was 26 when I came up with slam ball, right? So I was a maniac. I thought, I thought that, you know, anything we tried was going to work, right? So I actually built the first court myself

with like spare parts from like gymnastics facilities. So I would go around and I would go to an old gymnastics facility and I'd be like, hey, you've got a new gymnastics floor and an old gymnastics floor. Me and my buddies could come out here and take that old gymnastics floor out of here. I don't know, you could put a pommel horse there or something.

And they actually went for it. I was able to get all these spare parts and I was able to put together the first slam ball court with like lumber, like discount lumber from Home Depot and the whole nine yards, right? This was such a bad idea, you guys. Like I had no engineering background whatsoever. I remember specifically in the first court that we built,

the first like practice court was like this half court thing. Like I passed the guy, one of our guys passed the guy a ball and he actually fell through the floor and the ball just kind of zipped past him and like hit the wall. So shit like that was going down left, right and center. But finally, we were able to prove that this thing was like exciting enough

that and had enough potential that we could build the first full court which we did in East LA. And I populated it with the most athletic guys I could find. I was a Hooper that was around town and stuff like that. And I brought in the guy that was like six foot eight and had a 40 inch vertical and stuff like that and fell out of his scholarship for some weird reason.

And I was able to cobble together a bunch of guys like that who had super athleticism and then stacked on top of what the spring beds and the trampolines could do. Wow, you really had something special. And hilariously in that first court, we kind of took over this gym, that first full court in East LA.

We had kind of taken over this gym. So a couple of people like came in and they like watched us practice for a couple of hours and we didn't really think about what was going on but they left and they came back with like 20 friends. So within like three or four days, we were playing in front of like 1,000 people in East LA and we invited some television people down

and that's where we got a television deal right there in the warehouse. And we hadn't even figured out the rules yet, right? Literally like, I'm just trying to keep my guys from like, you know, coming back every day and working hard. And it was a little tricky because slam ball at its core is, you know, especially in the United States

is really like basketball and football culture is colliding, right? And can you do that? Could you get basketball players and football players to play on the same court together with like full contact rules? And so we had like just a couple of guys that were football players

and they were blowing up the basketball players, right? And the basketball players just wanted to fight and the football players just wanted to keep going. So it was kind of like this weird thing where I was like, wow, I gotta find some way to like mix this up. So I basically like put myself into the game and I told, pulled the football guys aside and I was like, listen, this next game

just beat the shit out of me. Like hit me left everywhere you can, right? Hit me into the glass, hit me into the walls, whatever you can do, right? And so they did it and the basketball players were like, wow, if he can take it, then we can take it. And so you would think they would be nicer to me given that I signed their checks,

but no, that wasn't the case. So what were the insurance rates like on that first court? I have to imagine that you probably couldn't find anybody that would be like, yeah, you know what, we'll take care of the liability here. Yeah, you know, it wasn't that much of a problem early on. They were like, oh yeah, a live action video game, that sounds good.

I mean, you know, it's like Ninja Warrior and those types of things all kind of live in the same universe, USC all kind of lives in the same universe. So I think the insurance companies were like, yeah, you know, let's see how it works out. Well, we're willing to give this thing a try. And what's interesting is that you would think watching

slam ball that you would have, you know, tremendous injury rates, but we actually don't because of the spring floor, a lot of times you don't get hurt when you get hit. You get hurt when you hit the ground because the ground doesn't move, right? So the combination of the spring floor and obviously the spring beds creates a really

interesting environment where, you know, you can, you can get into kind of a collision in the air and fall into a spring bed. And it turns into like a sprain instead of a break. And we see that a lot. You know, we were able to have the injury rates that are much closer to basketball than what you'd see in say football or hockey.

Yeah. So, all right. So you get on TV, it kind of captures America for a moment there. And then what happens next? Like what is the, where did slam ball maybe not reach that next level? Even though it was successful because you literally invented a sport

in a league out of thin air. But where, like, if you could point to a moment where you're like, all right, if this had gone differently, it may be still is really, really popular. Instead, it's something that everyone looks back at and is like, that was cool. Yeah. We thought we were doing something really special.

That first year we had great ratings. It got picked up for a second year on Spike TV. We're really excited about that. Every time we gotten up to bat in like, you know, mass market opportunities, the numbers do exceptionally well. So we were really excited to see the, you know, second season numbers and stuff like that.

At the time, Spike TV, the only thing that was really, really working on Spike TV was wrestling. So there was this thought that like, could we make slam ball a more like wrestling? And we were sports guys and we were getting, you know, 10,000 emails a week from people who were like, where can I play?

How can I get a jersey? When's the video game coming out, right? So we thought we had a real sport on our hands and we wanted to stick to that ethos. So we chose to like walk away from that opportunity and, you know, set it up in a different way, which we did some years later with ING, which is one of the biggest sports marketing companies

in the world. We were able to put our championship game on CBS, head to head with the NFL over on Fox, Cowboys Giants, by the way. And we like tripled our ratings projection. So that's what I mean when I say like, every time we've gotten a big opportunity, it's really popped. And now we've been able to go over to China,

be able to set up real grassroots over there, really understand the training program, the safety protocols, the safety equipment. So we think we're in a totally different position now. And people just keep clamoring for slam ball to come back. I like to say we like press the button in the culture back then and it's never really been un-pressed. So, you know, slam ball was trending last week

and all my interns were like, you should go on part of my tape. And my intern Jacob was like, PMT would fucking go off on this. And so I reached out to Hank and he was like, would you want me to come on and talk about slam ball? And he was like, yes, full stop. Total spot up until 10 minutes ago

that it was a practical joke. So wait, there are always rumors that pop up because I've heard people talk about slam ball in the last, you know, like six, seven years. Give me a percentage. What percentage do you think that we'll be able to get slam ball on television here in the United States in the next five years?

Oh, a hundred percent. A hundred percent. I can actually break some news. Yes, yes. And so I can't say any names, right? I'm contractually barred from saying any names, but there is a legitimate slam ball movie that's in development right now at a major studio

with an A-list filmmaker involved and a legit movie star who grew up with slam ball, not unlike you guys and like things that's one of the coolest things ever. So that's in the works right now. There's a lot. What's that? Nicholas Cage.

No, not Nick Cage, but no. Rob Schneider. Rob Schneider, no. Okay. One more. Blake Griffin, definitely not. But Martin Scorsese. Martin Scorsese.

It is not Martin Scorsese. Fuck, that was my guess, damn. But it is gonna be great. We're really excited about it. We're pouring a lot into it. And there's a bunch of people that are really serious about bringing slam ball back in a more organized way. If you remember, UFC, like K-N-Out had a moment

and then had to go away for a while before it could, it was really, people demanded that it came back and it was able to kind of take over the culture. So we think we're in that moment right now. I also think that there's like a big resurgence of like nostalgia for exactly that time period right now. So like five years ago, we were talking about the 90s. Now everything like early 2000s is starting to come back.

And I know people my age would absolutely kill to see slam ball again. Well, and also it's weirdly, I mean, it will never compete with true basketball, but it is very funny to think about NBA now, like one of the big complaints is everyone just shooting threes all the time. And it's outside the three point line or layups.

Slam ball is just contact at the rim, which you don't get as much. So maybe that's what like tapping into that where it's true like old school basketball, so to speak. Yeah, well, I mean, slam ball, we like to say that the defense is as exciting as the offense because you basically have a stopper, which is kind of like a trailer on offense,

but his job is to protect the rim like a goalie and hockey or soccer or something like that. So his job is to be this, we've had guys that are like six, 10, 285 in that position, right? So their job is to be ferocious and put themselves between the attacking player and the rim over and over again. The record for slam ball is 36 blocks in a,

so the idea is that the defense is just as exciting. The perimeter defense is full contact, guys get after it. And obviously there's that kind of head hunting mentality in the air. So we think that like right now is a great time because we launched really before social media, before like, you know, being dunking on someone was, you know, part of the mass culture nomenclature.

So we think that the sports really lining up for a perfect sort of resurgence. What's the rule change or rule changes that you had to make in slam ball from the original concept that you're like, all right, we have to change this. And it was for the better. Oh yeah, there was a thing called drifting where a defensive player would,

so the idea is that, you know, this guy attacks and the defender goes up to stop him at the rim. So the defender kind of figured out that he's this big, strong guy and usually like stronger than the guy attacking him. So he just jumped straight into the guy. And it was like two missiles like hitting head to head. So we had to make this rule

where you had to make a play on the ball. You couldn't just like tackle the guy in midair. And then you had to go vertical in order to try to protect the rim. So that was one of the rules that we call it drifting if the guy goes out. Okay, so how about a rule that made the game better though? That sounded like it made the game worse.

Oh, yeah, exactly. But the thing is, you know, we have like this culture in slam ball where, you know, we're all protecting each other first and foremost, right? And I love my slam ball guys because they come from football, basketball backgrounds. Most of them played at big programs.

They played at basketball at Kansas or football at USC or Clemson or something like that. So guys are bringing like real competitive juices to this thing and they get after it. But, you know, we all respect each other. It's kind of like the martial arts thing in MMA. And guys, guys go out there and look to put on the best possible competitive game

where they're doing anything and everything to win. But we always want to, we always want to make sure it's safety first. I love, by the way, I love the quote that you had that the reason why slam ball didn't succeed the first time was it was just too early. That's really like, that's really when you're genius level. Like the world wasn't ready for slam ball.

Well, I mean, thanks for saying that. I think that- But you said that, you said that. Well, yeah, but I didn't say genius, but I'm glad you worked that in. But what was really amazing that I've seen is in China, right? So we've created in China a number of facilities where people can come and learn slam ball

and play slam ball with their friends. And that we think is just the ultimate. Because it's everybody, so it's like, we asked this, like, why do you like to hang out a slam ball? It's like, we like to take videos of each other and post it on Webuwa because it gets us more attention from girls. So it all foots to a good place.

Is there a difference in style between the Chinese slam ball and American slam ball? Well, it's interesting because in America, we really see slam ball as like, I think I said this before, basketball and football cultures colliding. Which is a really tricky alchemy, right? But the two most obsessive sports in China

are actually basketball and gymnastics, right? So they all grow up with some kind of rudimentary gymnastics, rudimentary body control. So we see a lot of guys in China that are really more about the crazy aerial stuff. And we had a number of guys, this one guy, Lu Feng in China, was an absolute monster. He was almost the MVP of series five,

which we held just a few years ago in arenas in China. I kind of like the idea of having different cultures have their different styles of slam ball, like kind of growing up insulated from everyone else. And then maybe you were thinking too small, maybe instead of professional slam ball league, you just skip right to a World Cup, get 32 teams in there.

That's exactly where we wanna go with it. If you look, other than the goal in soccer, the slam dunk is the sports highlight that crosses every barrier, every social and political and geographic barrier. So we think and we know that we know this from the data that we've received that there's a global audience for slam ball,

there's a global population who wants to participate in it. And we love this idea of doing summer slam ball, could be as early as next year guys, summer slam ball 2022, and that would be our US media package. And then we go out to a global schedule after that. I love it. I'm all in on slam ball coming back.

Do you need an announcer? Cause we have an announcer here with us right now. Jake Marsh will be the voice of slam ball if you allow him. Like he actually, he went to Syracuse, he went to Syracuse, he got his big J degree. He's a great play by play man. I'm just saying like this is important cause you need someone to be the voice of the sport.

A big game voice. Yeah, big game voice. So just a thought. Speak it into existence. It's not just a thought. I can sign my reel. I'll do tapes. He'll do tapes.

He doesn't speak Chinese. Jake will learn Chinese. He'll learn Chinese if he has to. There you go. Give him some Chinese, Jake. Give him some Chinese. Nihao. There we go.

Boom. Boom. Did you hear that? Did you hear the Chinese? Yeah. That's good. You know, I lived in China for over a year and I just barely learned enough Chinese

to get around in taxis. So that's impressive. Yeah. Jake is really a jack of all trades. He can do it all. So we have full confidence in him. If you were to come up with like your ideal slam ball team based on, well, let's put it this way.

What NBA team right now would have the makeup to feel the best slam ball team? Oh, well, it's the Miami Heat, right? It's like Ben Adubato, when he like erased Jason Tatum's like, you know, shot in the playoffs. It was like, I was like, oh, damn, that's slam ball. I was at that game. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, on the video board behind. Shout out to Jason Tatum who tweeted about slam ball last week. That was freaking awesome. Oh, yeah. But yeah, it's like, you know, it's like a grimy go get it kind of thing.

I think that's a big thing, which is why I love you guys' show. It's like, you guys are really interested in the grit and the competitive fire as much as the spotlight and all the stardom that comes with the sports. And that's what I think slam ball really does. It doesn't take itself too seriously. It's super fun.

Imagine slam ball being the thing you watch bridging yourself from the end of the NBA season to the beginning of the NFL season. Yeah, so here's what you need to do. You need to offer like a Rudy Gobert. You need to offer him an 80 year, like $3 million a year contract to play slam ball. Something ridiculous like that to get you on the map.

That's what you've got to do. You've got to offer someone his contract like that. Well, I think that we're actually looking for different athletes than the NBA is, right? The NBA is a very specific kind of athlete at different levels and stuff like that. But we're looking for guys that have multi-sport backgrounds, right?

Nate Robinson would be an absolute monster in slam ball because he played football at the college level. He played basketball at the college and pro level, right? And the idea that he could get up in the air and joust with anybody. Don't say he could joust with anyone. Still praying for him. Fair enough, fair enough.

It's funny, though, because he took the inter-sports discipline thing a little too far when he stepped into the box. Yeah, that's true. I actually think the Nuggets would make a pretty good team because you got Jokic. And you know what one really underrated asset is of anyone on a trampoline is the guy that's your best friend that gives you the super bounce.

The double bounce. The double bounce that hits the trampoline right before you hit it. And Jokic is like, I don't know, 300 pounds. Get him in, I guess, Jamal Murray. And then Bull Bull guarding the rim. Bad news for you about Jamal Murray, sir. I know.

But he'll be back. Yeah. He always does come back. He does. All right, fine. Was it Michael Porter, Jr.? Yeah, I think. Is his spine up for it?

Sure. OK. I mean, I think of Jimmy Butler, right? Just being like gritty and physical and all these things. Having a ton of skill. But being able to just put his head down and make a play happen at the rim. It's like those kind of things happen.

But we've got there are so many athletes that are professional caliber coming out of NCAA programs every single year that we want to create a platform for those athletes, those hyper athletic, crazy, physical guys. You need, though, you need a face. Maybe Tyler Hansboro. He's probably not doing anything. Psycho T.

Yeah, someone who can just bleed all over the place and be like, holy shit, remember that guy? Tough Borland. Yeah. Give us something like that. All right, well, you should actually hire us. I could be a, we could be GM check. Yeah.

Blank check us to find to the best team possible. I mean, I don't see how slam ball and part of my tape don't grow together. You know, you guys are already number one. So I don't know how much, how much higher you could get in the rankings. I mean, slam ball is number one in trampoline sports. In my heart.

Yeah. I think we could actually find a decent slam ball team just based on our unemployed friends. Yes. Spencer Hawes. Yes. Well, I guess Danny Woodhead's retired technically. But he would be good.

He'd be very good at it. Blake Bortles would be sick. Deli would be a great slam ball player, honestly. Yeah, we'll find, we'll put together. All right, I have one last question though. It's the row back question. Put in code PFT on rowback.com for 20% off your first purchase. R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com code PFT.

They make the best performance polls. The only performance polls we wear. And for our guests today, we'd like to gift you a row back performance Q-zip on us. So there you go. The most important question for slam ball to succeed in America. Who is the goat?

And is there maybe two goats that we can debate? Two goats in slam ball? Yeah, who's the goat? Yeah, well, a lot of people say it's a guy named Stan Fletcher. OK. Who actually was, you know, a lot of guys remember from kind of the classic slam ball seasons. He was a guy that was making up plays in midair

and tossing the ball to himself and creating these unbelievable self passes and things like that. He actually called it the chaser. David Names and stuff. So he really expanded what slam ball it meant to play slam ball on that level creatively. And then there was another guy who played basketball at Kansas named Jelani Janisse, who

was absolutely the most dominant guy you ever saw, because he was 6'4", 225 pounds, and the fastest guy on the floor. So he was playing basketball, and he was the most physical guy. So he was playing basketball and football. So right now, the debate is probably Stan Fletcher or Jelani Janisse. OK.

I think I'm a Stan Stan. I think I might be a Jelani Janisse guy. OK, good. Delican debate. Now we're good to go. This is how it works, yeah. So I like the alliteration, Jelani Janisse. I'm watching him right now, and he's pretty fucking good.

Who was the guy that did the flip, landed on their back, and then bounced off their back and dunked? Do you remember that? Yeah, that was a guy named Chris Robbins. He played football at Clemson. And he was really great because he had this gymnastics vibe to him, but he was coming from a football background. So where everybody else was trying

to do fancy dribbles and stuff, Chris was just trying to take people's heads off. Dude, I'm watching Jelani Janisse's highlight tape right now. I don't. Slam ball is just objectively awesome. Like, I don't know how you could watch it and not be like, this is sick. Just dunking on people as hard as possible.

Oh, man. And wait, dunks are worth three, right? That was the rule? Dunks are worth three, and regular shots are worth one, correct? Which I actually think the NBA is going to have to adopt, that dunk's being worth three in order to change the geometry of what's happening in the NBA right now.

If, first and foremost, is you have to stop people from attacking the rim, right? And now you've got people that are able to make one dribble at the three-point line, and get all the way to the rim with no defense. So I think if they were able to do that, it would collapse some of the defense. It would create for more exciting movements,

and ultimately take the NBA to a different place. But they're going to have to change it to a three to keep up with slam ball once you overtake them. Maybe, well, we'll see, right? A very underrated part about slam ball is the full contact on the full court. Like, they're just dudes at half court after they pick up their dribble,

and you can just body check them. Yeah, and that's what we want to do. It's that plus the penalty shot, right? And slam ball is a lot more exciting than a free throw. If you hit me, I get a chance to go one-on-one with you at the rim, which is like a showdown at the OK corral. And we want to make slam ball the betting sport of all betting sports.

You're just betting on every single element throughout the game. These games are short format. 20 minutes, they're a television half hour. So you can watch a bunch of them in a row if you wanted to. So we think that slam ball is really optimized for right now. And we're definitely seeing that sentiment out there. All right, so tip there is just make sure that all overs hit

all the time. All over. Yeah, I don't know how you could possibly do it. But if all the overs hit, oh, god, I'm watching all these highlights right now. These are sick. I'm watching the Stan Fletcher take over here. This is such a hilarious fucking sport.

Who came up with the names for your teams? Because that's, I think, one part that we could maybe clean up. We could update a little bit. Because they were very early 2000s. The rumble, the vortex, the diabloes. Yeah, the rumble, the mob, the slashers, the mawlers. Steel. But as we break, yeah, the steel was actually

the stealers' colors. And we had to stop doing that. Stop the steel. Yeah, stop the steel. So yeah, I think the idea is that we would really love to be able to get the PMT audience to help brain-fund this thing so that we have the best possible names coming back.

I think you'll see a handful of legacy teams, because some people know those teams and love those teams. Oh, yeah. I mean, you can't. That would be like saying the Yankees don't exist anymore. The mob has to keep existing. Yeah, you have to have that out there. There's history there.

We definitely can brain-fund some of those names. Because we came up with a bunch of names for La Crosse team a while back. I actually feel like some of the ones that we came up with that they didn't use might be winners for Slam Ball. Yeah. The Lakes.

The Dunks. The Doinks. And it's just everyone's got to be high. That's good. Yeah. Yeah, low key that happens a lot. Yeah, right. Yeah, why not?

Why not? Why not? The Jakes. And it's just Jake screaming that he's the best one in the building. Yeah, Alfred and everyone. Yeah. We'll come up with something.

Yeah, we'll toss it around. Yeah. All the teams, we would have to do a joint merchandising campaign. Yes, I love it. Well, Mason, this has been awesome, man. And we're going to be watching. We're going to be next time you're in New York,

you've got to come by. And we've got to try to bring Slam Ball back. We're in for it. Thank you, guys. I can't tell you how much I appreciate this. And thanks to Hank for making it happen. Absolutely. Can you give us one hint as to who the actor is that's

playing the main part of the Slam Ball movie? I wish I could. The next time I'm on the show, I should be able to tell you. OK. Ooh, Miles Teller. Vince Vaughn. More athletic than more athletic than both of them. Michael B. Jordan.

You overshot it with the rock. Damn. You didn't say anything to Michael B. Jordan. No, it's not Michael B. Jordan. Sly Stallone. Ooh, Steven Seagal. But how amazing would it be to see all the girls there? Mm.

Jonah Hill. Ooh. Not Jonah Hill. OK. I think we're, I think we named every actor. Oh, Kevin from the office. Tenzo Washington. Tenzo Washington.

All good guesses. All good guesses. I want to see all these guys play Slam Ball, but not correct in this case. OK. All right. Thank you, Mason. Now just tell us we'll cut this part.

No, I seriously can't. That was awesome. But I am literally like contractually like I lose the house. Right. Right. That's why we'll cut it. Yeah.

Right. So clever. Just initials. But the next time I'm on, I will hopefully be able to tell you. All right. Just Thursday work for you? If it was I can break some more news, we'll do it again.

All right. If you need any extras in it, let us know. Yes. We'll make that happen. We'll make that happen. Yeah. All right. This was awesome.

Thank you. Thank you so much, man. Appreciate it. Give me a chat. Give me a chat. That interview with Mason Gordon was brought to you by our great friends over at nuts.com. Nuts.com is the best kept secret of savvy snackers

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We got some FAQs. We also have a few listeners submitted. So this, after Monday's discussion about nut tapping in Luka Donchich, we were, I was tweeting about it, and I got a couple funny tweets about the end of the nut games. The nut tap game, the one that ended everything.

So I said, send a couple funny ones. We have a couple funny ones to read, but I love the idea that everyone, every male out there has had that moment where they've had to stop the game. Cause like it's just too much. We're gonna, it will tear us apart. It's usually once you start to think about having children.

But no, so we had a couple different ones. So here's one good one. It started with this one from River McDonald. My last nut tap was two nights before I got married. My brother-in-law caught me at the bar and I knocked my tooth out on a beer bottle, showed up to rehearsal dinner with the plan to fix after the wedding, wife was pissed

and made me find an emergency dentist day of the wedding. It's a tough, that's a tough reaction. I don't know if you can necessarily blame the person that did the nut shot on that one because it sounds like the person that got hit reacted like a total bitch and doubled over and broke their tooth on a bottle. But this, the whiplash hit the bottle.

Yeah. All right, here's another one. Night before my wedding, two of my groomsmen were nut tagging in a bar. One went too far and a fight broke out in the front of the bathroom. They wrestled their way into the bathroom and knocked over a third groomsman pissing.

He was holding a beer bottle in one hand and his dick in the other. The bottle shattered when he went down. We ended up spending a half of the night in ER for him to get stitches. Wedding pictures were hilarious with black eyes, facial cuts and stitches. The ex-wife was not happy

but still best friends with the three of them. So, I like that they tossed an ex-wife. Ex-wife, so he ended up, that didn't last but a hilarious ending to like, I think that's a fair one to end when you have a full on brawl in a bathroom before a wedding. Yeah, Matt, whenever it involves somebody that's not the person getting nut tapped

or the person doing the nut tapping. I also like how every single person that emailed in or wrote in, they've got like different names for it. It's like soda and pop and coke. Jimmy tapping, yeah. Yeah, it's not very regional, I think. Here's another one.

Let's see, wait, oh, I had, where, where, where is it? Oh, high school baseball walked over a rake while our team was raking the field before a game. My buddy was behind me and perfectly timed my walk over the wooden handle. Curbs stomped the metal part and the entire stick flung up and got me direct hit. Perfect execution on his part.

I had to sit out the game and coach had to ban tapings. If he saw a tap, we'd run till we puked. I love that there's like an authority figure who's like, we have to ban this. And if you're a coach, why not just say you have to wear a cup? Your baseball player seems like an easy solution to the problem. Do kids still do cup checks?

Yeah, why not, right? They have to. I feel like if you do a nut tap when you're playing baseball with somebody, you can just rebrand it as a cup check and you're actually looking out for that guy's safety. I just love, and we'll get to FAQs, but I love the idea that like everyone has that moment

where they're like, you know what, it's over. Like we've had our best days, we have to end this. It can't keep going. Although I'm sure maybe what I should have asked is, is there anyone out there in like their 40s and 50s who's still doing this? Maybe it makes a resurgence after your kids. Okay, so I think what happens is there's like,

there's a very small percentage of people that enjoy, I don't know if it's a community or if it's the actual physical pain, but a small percentage of people like it because I know you guys have probably seen the clips. I don't recommend watching it to anybody, but there are videos that you can see online of like, I think it's a part of the domination scene

or dominatrix scene where a guy's like tied up and the girl just straight up starts kicking his balls repeatedly. That's like his kink that he's into. So I feel like those are the last guys that are still into the nut tapping scene. Everybody else kind of like, they move out as it becomes, you know, no longer a young fad thing to do.

Right. And these guys are lifers. Right. Oh man. All right Hank, FAQs, let's finish up. Short FAQs, we did get a lot of nut tapping submissions. Subfellows, hey Chonkat, when are you guys going to continue the Dungeons and Dragons quest?

Oh. Is it on a hiatus because of he, you shall not be named? Well, he's dead. He's been dead like four times. Literally and figuratively. Yes. We've killed him. Honestly, I think he's been dead, I think five times,

six times, and then he's been shit out a few times. So we don't need Billy to come back, but I feel like that would be a good thing to do. I think we'll do it in the summer, yeah. Over the summer? Yeah, I mean, we're getting, we probably should have done it the last couple of weeks because there was a little bit of a lull.

I think we're going to get back into, you know, playoff hockey and playoff basketball will be great in the next few like a month and a half. But I would say look for like July, August, we'll definitely do it, right? I think yeah. When the only thing we have to talk about is the Olympics, I feel like D&D would be nice to make a comeback there.

Yes, absolutely. Sup girl dad and Alan Collins free bird soloist, whose voice is on the intro for the show kind of sounds like our darling Jake. It was a guy. We had a guy that did it for us. Down like $500,000. Yeah, he's been some random number, I just thought.

Probably won't sue us for it. The Nightberry Bonds goat broke Hank Aaron's record. I got a Wiffleball bat to the balls for my friend trying to be Barry Bonds. That was just a good story. I mean, you'll remember it forever. A Wiffleball bat to the balls really hurt. One of the all done a lot of bat speed.

An all time grade C in varsity blues. When the guy put the beer on his head, just Billy Bob got him. Was that Twitter? I think Twitter got him. Let's throw this out there. Okay, now that we're just tossing out summer stuff. If anyone's got a Wiffleball tournament

within an hour driving distance of New York City, we will play. You're looking at a champ right now. And a weekday maybe. Let's call it weekday. What is this? No one does it. I just wanna do, I wanna play Wiffleball.

I wanna play some Wiffleball. I would too. That was a big commitment. Well, no, a weekday. You have to create the tournament and have it during the week. Yep. And we'll play.

A Wednesday afternoon in the summer, within an hour, we will show up. In Poughkeepsie. No, that's longer than Poughkeepsie. Within an hour of New York City has to be official field and everything. We will absolutely play. That'd be fun.

Yeah. Right? We're basically just like telling someone, if you can put it together, you can, we'll just come hang out for an afternoon. Maybe, you know what? Actually strike all that from the record. We're gonna go to Stu Finer's house

and we'll play some Wiffleball. Hell yeah. That's it. We'll do our own tournament. All right, so sorry if you already started planning it. Cancel that. We're gonna do our own tournaments, Stu Finer's house and get in the pool.

We'll make a video. What temperature is the pool right now? 80, 81. I don't know. Let me call him real quick and let's see how fast he answers and then. I need to know the exact temperature. How quickly I can get him off.

You committed a cardinal sin the other day. Oh yeah, that was bad. I didn't realize he was having an open fire night. But it was hilarious text. What are you doing, brother? Hey, what temperature is the pool right now? 88. Okay, great.

All right, we're gonna be out there at some point this summer. I love you so much, Missy. All right, you sound very high. No, I'm blown out. I'm playing some little dance break. I just finished playing. I'm gonna wash my hands.

I'm gonna smoke a bowl. I just smoked 10 bowl packs today. Hey! All right, I'll see you later, okay? Bye! Okay, bye. You can't do this with my life. I swear to God, I'm having a good time.

All right, okay, see ya. No, it hasn't been a time, dude. I love you. All right, love you too. Thank you. Okay, all right, bye. All right, one with this one. What's up?

You can tell he's, yeah. Yeah, so we'll do it. And you know what? Do people, I think people liked when Stu was on the show, but I can never tell. Stu's one of those guys who like, there will just always be some very big haters that will just yell about him.

I think if you hate Stu, it's more about you than it is about him. So I think, so here's what we're gonna do. He's a sweetheart of a guy. Yeah, we'll do a Wednesday or a Thursday. Go out, play some Waffle Ball with Stu, tape a little podcast and that will be awesome. I'm just throwing this out here.

What if we brought Stu in for Dungeons and Dragons? That would not work. You don't think so? No! I think if he was high enough. Stu needs guardrails, Stu needs guardrails. Maybe we'll ask Tim Woods if he wants to come to Stu's house.

I actually think it would be something different. If Tim Woods had to play Waffle Ball with us first. Yeah, okay. And watching Tim try to reign in Stu's house. Yeah, okay, all right. Yeah, I mean, if we can get this done, absolutely, sometime mid, mid, July, early August, all right. Right after the bike ride.

All right, what's up, handsome Hank, P.F. Titty, grande cat, bum Billy, who shall not be named, and Jacob. If you were to restart your athletic career at the age of 10, what sport would you choose to play that you think you would have the most success in? Golf. And I don't think I'd be successful. Football.

But golf. I think I would focus on just being a long snapper. Yeah. Because that's one thing that if you just do it all day, every day, you can get really good at it. But golf to me would be the one sport that I know, obviously I'm not saying I'd be a professional golfer, but if I had started at 10, I would have been better.

And it would, I think golf is a sport that like, if you're good, it's so much fun. Yeah. And you can play it forever. And it would help you socially too. Yeah. Like it's a fun thing to do in your 20s. I never took a golf, like I never even, yeah,

I mean, I just basically started golfing when I was like 23. When you're bad at it, you really never want to do it ever. Correct. So yeah, I wish I were a good at golf. I play football. You think you can make it? Yeah. You think you can be a league?

Yeah, my mom never let me play. And that's the only reason I didn't make it. Yeah. That's probably true. That's it. Jake, you, ping pong? Tennis. But you did play tennis.

Yeah, but I could start over and get better. Yeah. No regrets. I mean, it did make you the best in the office. At table tennis. Right. I just feel like I texted Hank yesterday. And what do you say?

Are you okay? Oh, God. I was sick. Yeah, I was brutal text again. Are you okay? I said, are you good? Are we good? No.

Are we good, bitch? No, it's not even asking like, are we good? And he's just making sure that Hank is not completely. Yeah, his entire life shattered because of me. So I'm looking out for him. Yup. Thanks, Jake. That's really big of you.

99. 18. Give me an eight. 44. 82. Dange. Please. Please, God.

13. Unlucky. 14. Is that a first timer? That is a first timer. Wow. The Mantis Shrimp has the world's fastest punch. I think we've had that fact a few times.

Okay. And NBC adopted the Peacock logo in 1956 because of the increase in color programming. Oh. They just dropped a hard C, all right. That's nice. Love you guys. Yeah, we'll edit that.

Jake, I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here.

I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here.

I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here.

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