Pardon My Take - Rob Corddry, 10X Pro Bowler Joe Thomas + Mt Rushmore Of Cartoon Shows

Episode Date: August 8, 2018

Rovell has broken the internet and we're sweating out the dog days of summer (2:58-8:15). Hot Seat/Cool Throne with Urban Meyer and Heterosexual frog talk (8:16-17:21). Mt Rushmore of Cartoon shows with a late breaking moos about Rick Pitino's upcoming podcast (17:22-30:10). Actor Rob Corddry joins the show to talk about Ballers Season 4, the Daily Show, and being an Eagle Scout (31:53-56:19). 10X Pro Bowler Joe Thomas joins the show to predict upcoming Cleveland Brown story lines and what he's been up to in his first summer off (58:25-1:14:24). Segments include bachelor talk for guys that dont watch the bachelor (1:16:12-1:21:15), Kings stay Kings for the Sixers (1:21:16-1:21:40), Take Quake from Fred Smoot (1:21:41-1:23:45) and Guys on Chicks (1:23:46-1:29:09). You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, ad-free, on Amazon Music. On today's pardon my take, we have 10-time pro bowler Joe Thomas on Cleveland Brown Legend. We did a little prediction about hard knocks, what we're going to all watch tonight, or now you've already watched it. So we also have Rob Cordry from Ballers, season four coming up.

One conversation with him, talking about the Daily Show, talking about ballers, talking about what else do we talk about with him? We talked about all sorts of stuff, big cat. Yeah, it was good. It was fun. His other show. Yeah, no, really good interview. Oh, Eagle, he's an Eagle Scout.

And that's, it was tough like not wedging him, fun fact. Let me jump in with this. We didn't actually talk to him about this on the air, but he did mention that he's friends with Jerry O'Connell. Yeah. And he's in a fantasy league with Jerry O'Connell, and he mentioned to us how bad Jerry sucks at fantasy football. So this is now becoming, Jerry O'Connell is a legend in the game of fantasy football

for being so bad. Speaking of Rob Cordry and Jerry O'Connell in movies, mile 22, mile 22 showcases a new wave of combat cinema. It's fast paced, visceral, it puts the audience right into the action. Unlike any other theater experience, Peter Berg, director of Lone Survivor teams up with Mark Wahlberg for a completely original action thrill ride. Mark Wahlberg's character is intense, smart and complex. He has a depth that you don't see in traditional action heroes.

Wahlberg plays the leader of an elite special ops team called Overwatch. The team's sole purpose is to complete their assigned mission at any cost. As described in the movie, the mission is first, last and everything in between. Co-starring, uh, Iku Uise, Lauren Cohen, the, the, I said that right, Liam, don't, don't you, don't you do that. Lauren Cohen, Rhonda Rousey and John Malkovich. He goes unique raw fighting style pairs perfectly with established action stars, Wahlberg, Cohen and Rousey in theaters, August 17th.

We're going to see this. We're going to be on the road. I think we should do a movie night. We're going to see mile 22. So you see it. We'll do a review of it on the podcast. Go see it. Starring Mark Wahlberg, August 17th.

It's going to be awesome. It is action. It is fun. It is Peter Berg at his finest August 17th. See it in premium large format. Do it. Do it. Do it.

Okay. Let's go. Bye. Bye. Now in the street there is violence and a lot of stuff work to be done. Welcome to part of my take presented by Seek Geek. Today is Wednesday, August 8th. We were thinking about what to do for the start of the show because we are officially

in the dog days of summer, which I want to get back to. And then Darren Ravel dropped his video of singing the beast part in Beauty and the Beast and has brought the entire internet to a screeching halt. Darren broke the internet. Yeah. It was like Kim Kardashian cover paper magazine. It was amazing. It was incredible.

He is no offense to you, big cat. I know you've been called this. He is the songbird of our generation now. Well, he's the other generation because now he's over 40. Oh, that's true. Yeah. He's no longer in the pool. No under 40 club.

Yeah. So now you turn 40 and you start singing musicals. Yes. And I just want to say I am enthralled by it. He has, this is breaking news, Hank's not here so we can't do the cows. Liam, can you give us a cow? Bubba? Bubba.

Do it. Do it. Do it. That was actually pretty good. That wasn't that. No, it wasn't good. No, it wasn't good. Darren has agreed to come on part of my take to perform a song.

Yes. He wants to perform with Electric Avenue. Do you, dramatic, well, he hasn't agreed in classic Ravel fashion. He just answered my question with the question, do you want to do a dramatic singing of Electric Avenue? Sure. So I said if Darren comes on, we will pick a song from a musical and sing it with him. That's great.

We'll call it American Brandstand. Yes. There we go. That's perfect. Let's write some new lyrics for it. It should just be jingles, actually. Yeah. Poor Darren Ravel's shower, he keeps replying to everyone and they're like, that was actually

pretty good. He's like, the shower gets it every night, bro. Sweet. He's fucking taking that out on the shower. I'm calling my shot right now. Darren absolutely knows every single word to like Mike. Yeah. They generate theme songs.

Oh, maybe we should do Cats. That would be good. Mr. Mestofles. Bring it back. Yeah. Yeah. Have the longest run on Broadway, which is, I don't know if that's a fact or not. What's that about that play?

I have no idea, but I know it was like, it went on forever. Okay. Yeah. The K-A-T-Z Cats. Yeah. Perfect. Perfect. And then we'll eat from the deli, the Cats deli, while we have stuff our faces, we'll

do a little Mike Golik does it as well. Now we're on to something. So, Darren Ravel dropped that, brought everyone to, like, we basically stopped. I got Hezied, but I literally broke my ankles. He Hezied me. I didn't know it was possible for guys to lubricate, but I'm wet as shit. Yes, very. I have a lot going on downstairs.

Yeah. Good thing I'm wearing my bird dogs. Yeah. Not even an ad. No. It was a perfect ad. But I wanted to, I alluded to dog days of summer. I realized something today.

I'm going to be one of those people that dies in the summer because I just can't take the heat anymore. I fucking hate the summer. I'm done with the summer. Now that we're in a safe space because Hank's not here and he can't be like, he's cool. Just live by the beach, bro. Like, can we just agree New York City in the summer sucks? It's bad.

Listen, I'm very much a beach guy. Always have been. Beach is cool. I like the heat. I prefer it over the cold. But today was one of those days where it was pavement hot outside. Yes. Where it's like bouncing off the sidewalk into your face.

Basically God's calling bank and firing a shot off of the asphalt. Right in our eyes. Right at you. Here's a little fun fact. Have you ever noticed how theme parks and water parks always have black sidewalks? Yeah. It's to make you more thirsty so you buy more concessions. Yeah.

Stay woke. That's like pretzels at a bar. Yeah. That's why I just bring my umbrella wherever I go. I'm a sun umbrella guy. Yeah. It's perfect. These are the dog days of summer.

These are the time when we don't have football yet. It's doubly triggering for Hank. We need football. Because he hates dog. He likes summer and he hates dogs. He hates dogs. He doesn't know what to do. Yeah.

I've just realized that I'm going to be probably in my 50s or 60s and it'll be one of those situations where I'm mowing the lawn or maybe that one day where you get a little bit of extra juice. You're like, I'm going to go for a run and then I'm just going to die. They're going to find me on the pavement. I'm going to die. It's going to be my melted body. And I don't care because I've realized this is how I'm going out.

I'm a big dog. Big dogs don't deal well with the heat. I mean, Ted Williams knew enough to die in the cold. True. Makes you last forever. Yes. Exactly. Is his head still there?

Yeah. His head is still in like a lab in Arizona. I thought it went bankrupt. I thought it went bankrupt. Yeah. Which it's a great business model. If your only clients are dead people, they can't sue you. Yeah.

True. I actually would totally freeze my brain. Like the more, I know everyone laughs at Ted Williams. But just think about it. It's going to be cool to just wake up in like 600 years and be like, hey, Ted, what's up, man? Nice little nap. Yeah.

You're back. Yeah. Wake me up. 600 years later. Perry Ellis is senior year. Yes. I'll act like I didn't miss a beat. Yeah.

He's going to be up the draft boards. Okay. We have a pack show for you. We have Rob Cordray. We have Joe Thomas. We have a very big Mount Rushmore. But before we do that, why don't we do our hot seat cool throne? Let's power through that and then we'll get to our Mount Rushmore, which is going to be

interesting because it's Mount Rushmore cartoons and we have the super millennial, second gen millennial Bubba hosting the show or producing the show because Hank is on his 16th vacation this year. This summer. This summer? 500 days of Hank's summer. Yeah. Exactly.

He's just hanging out. He doesn't even know that we have a show anymore. Okay. PFT, why don't you start? All right. I'll go first. My first hot seat is NASCAR. But NASCAR on the hot seat because their CEO, Brian France, got a DUI and he had a lot of

pills on him. So he got arrested, I guess, for, he was driving too slowly, which is kind of ironic for the CEO of NASCAR. And then he said that they need to talk to President Donald Trump, who's a close personal friend of his, and he'll straighten this whole mess out. I love the name drop. The name drop when you're getting arrested is such a power move and it's because you know that, like, hey, your brain should know this is going to end up in a paper.

I'm going to look like a huge douchebag, but I'm still going to shoot my shot. Yeah. Well, so here's the thing. If you get arrested and you want to drop a name, it's kind of the inverse of what you think it should be. You want to drop the smallest name possible that the guy would recognize. It's like you want to drop the name of his, like, slightly superior officer, maybe a guy that went through training right before him.

You don't want to go straight to the top with a president, although, I mean, Trump's got the pardon. So that would be a hell of a pardon, wouldn't it? Wow. Could you imagine? Yeah. Trump hates France. We know that.

Yes. I'm not a fan. All right. So what does he do now? Like, you can't get a DUI in general, but you really can't get a DUI when you're the president of a car racing. Right. At least get a DUI for going way too fast.

I mean, NASCAR was founded by bootleggers who were probably drunk off their asses. He's just going back to the roots. Yeah, going back to the roots except driving very slow and oxy. So my second hot seat is going to be the course and more specifically, course guys like us. So the PGA championships coming up, Belarive, I believe is the name of the golf course. It's in bad shape right now. So I don't know if you've seen pictures of the greens.

They've spray painted around the greens. So the masters may or may not use spray paint, but at least you can't really tell that it's spray paint. Right. They use the Carlos Boozer spray paint. This looks, yeah, that's a good point. It looks like the field at FedEx in Raul John Maryland that the Redskins plan, which is I guess probably good news for players who are trying to score low numbers.

Yeah. And tear their ACL. Yeah. So if anybody, yeah, Tiger, be great for Tiger. Great for Tiger. Shoot a low number. And then my cool throne is the Buccaneers because Hulk Hogan stopped by their training camp today.

So yeah, if you're keeping track, it's a big week for Hogan's with big dicks showing up at training camps between that and New England. And then he had a couple of mud brother with James Winston. Like it. Oh, those two guys. Yeah. Just hanging out, respecting women. Just doing it.

Yeah. Those two guys. That's a great picture. All right, Bubba, what do you got? Wait, wait, I'm not done. Oh, I'm not done. I'm not done. My second cool throne is heterosexual frogs because Alex Jones has been kicked off Facebook

and YouTube and U-Porn. U-Porn also banned me from their website. That's a bridge too far. That is a bridge. Well, I want to know where this line is drawn because are you allowed to like make a video of yourself and then have Alex Jones on in the background? Where do you draw the line? It's a very slippery slope.

Yes. When dealing with this. This is like MLB not letting you take video of their game. Like when I used to, I used to like put Stella in front of the TV and just be like, I'm just taking a video of my dog and there happens to be a Cubs home run in the background. They're definitely going to be some Russian cam girls on some campsites that have Alex Jones broadcast in the background the whole time. Oh, I like that.

Like Putin's little sex slaves. Why don't we do that? Bubba set us up with a U-Porn account. Yes. Set us up with a U-Porn account. Not the current ones we have. Uh-huh. Yeah.

Burners. Yeah. But good news is I just cornered the market for crazy. So if you need Alex Jones takes, you can only come to InfoSchools. Yep. I've got all the documents right here. Do you remember when we tried to have Bubba create the fake YouTube accounts? We should get back to that.

Oh, yeah. PFT had me make a fake porn account too to try to upload Josh Allen's highlight tape. It like wouldn't let me because it like wasn't pulling. I forgot about that. You set up the U-Porn and let's start doing Alex Jones. I think I made, I think I have one. Okay. That's just like, no video.

We've been asking Lam to do a lot of work with pornography recently, so we'll go back off that. So Bubba, you're up next? Uh, yeah. My hot seat is UNC Football. They had 13 players suspended for selling gear that they got. So they don't get paid. The only thing they get is like their jumpsuits.

Oh, yeah. I saw this. Yep. So they got, they got like player edition Jordan 3. So there's only like 150 of them total. So they're like worth a shit ton. They're worth like two, three grand. They're gonna be tracked, right?

Yeah. And so then when they show up on like eBay or on like a reseller secondhand market, they're just like easily tracked. Right. So they just got caught for it. Shit. So basketball team or football team? Football team.

Okay. Yeah. I mean, that's a good fucking excuse. So I'm cool with this. It's a good built-in excuse. Yeah. For Carolina to lose like their first two games. Yeah.

Yeah. It's because of Jordans. Right. Yeah. And PJ Tucker bought one of them too. Oh, he did? Yeah. Okay.

How much were they going for? Like 2,500. Fuck. Yeah. I would have sold it too. Yeah, I know. Why the fuck would you not? Free these kids.

You have no money? Yeah. And my cool throne is Josh Gordon because Antonio Callaway, another Browns receiver, got pulled over for failing to yield for oncoming traffic and got caught with weed. Now, he had an all-time spend zone though. I don't know if you saw his explanation. Did you see it? Yeah.

He had his car shipped up from Florida and he hadn't used it in a while. So I guess his friend was driving his car around Florida and put pot in his car and then it got shipped up to him. Did Michael Irvin have something like this where he had like a crack pipe? He's like, no, that was no. I bought this car from the dealer. No. He was holding the crack pipe for his friend who was trying to get clean and Irvin was

sporting him and took the crack pipe away from him. That makes sense. Yeah. Totally different story. That checks out. My hot seat is Ohio State fans. So if you saw the Urban Meyer rally that was held on Monday and the fans were bashing ESPN, which, okay, that's fine.

But I feel like we should have learned our lesson with the Jopla rallies. Maybe wait until we figure everything out before you do like an entire impromptu rally at the stadium being like free Urban Meyer. I've noticed that a lot of these protests are occurring during the day on weekdays. Yes. Interesting. There's a lot of baggy cargo shorts there too. Tons of them.

Yeah. It was a very, very Ohio scene. Yeah. So I don't even know. And the best part is I don't, I can't really wrap my head around these people because I would assume these are the same people that if you bash Urban Meyer on Twitter, they will reply with wait till all the facts come out. But then they also held an entire rally with none of the facts out.

My favorite was a guy made a poster that was a bracket of fake news. And so he had Brett McMurphy on there, the guy that broke the story for himself. On Facebook. On Facebook. Not for any other company. Right. But Brett McMurphy has an agenda against Ohio State for reasons that were not specified. Yeah.

His wife's a Michigan fan. There you go. Yeah. And then it was like him against Sage Steele and he won. And that was the entire tournament. Damn. That's nice. Who was else in the final four?

Oh, Mark May was in there. Yeah, Mark May was in there. Mark May's not fake news. He's just dumb. He can't really understand it. Yeah. Yeah. It's dumb news.

He's not malicious. He made that up, Lou. Yeah. He's not maliciously trying to deceive the audience. He's just really stupid. Yeah. There's a big difference. Huge difference.

I mean, you listen to this podcast. We're stupid. You listen to this podcast. You should know the difference between fake news and dumb news. We are the torch bearer for, is that the right word? Torch bearer. Yeah. Torch bearer.

Yeah. Well, I don't want to say that. The Tiki torch bearer for dumb news. Right here. Pardon my take. We should actually have that be the tagline. That's a terrible tag. We are an anti-nazi podcast.

You're one stop shop for dumb news. That's us. Okay. My cool throne is my good personal friend, Jay Kuller, because on Very Cavalry, the hit reality show on Sunday nights on E. This isn't an ad. This is just facts I'm saying. It was revealed that he is awesome at sex now because he read a GQ article about how to eat vagina.

Is that the word? Virginia. How to lick Virginia. Yeah, lick it. And lick it good. Just saying. Cool throne. Cut his back.

Yeah. So the GQ article said the vagina is the hole on the top, and so he figured that whole thing out. Do it. Yeah. We're eating the Virginia this year, guys. So in your face, DJ Kuller. Yeah.

Suck it, Junior Soprano. No, he was pretty good at it. Oh, he was. Yeah. Junior Soprano was a rug doctor. Yeah, that's right. That's right. He ate it good.

You eat pussy, Bubba? Millennials call it punani. Punani. You eat the punani. Okay. All right. So let's do our Mount Rushmore of cartoon shows. Now, this is going to be interesting because, as we said, Bubba is...

You think J. Kuller takes a cigarette out before he licks pussy? Well, that's Bill Clinton. That's kind of like a bad boy game. Yeah. I don't know. Uh-huh. It's a lot you can do there. A lot you can do there.

So Bubba is 22? 23. 22. 22. So his cartoons, his Mount Rushmore cartoons, will most likely be very different than ours. Uh-huh. So I'm very excited for this.

Bubba, you decide the order. Me, you, PFT. Okay. I'll bring up the tail. Let's do it, Bubba. Number one, no brainer, Simpsons. Okay. Best cartoons for a ball of time.

Yeah. Okay. Even though there were only like seven or eight awesome seasons of it, those seven or eight seasons were good enough to justify like 50 years of shit. Yes. Yes. And I don't know if you watch those good seasons. So...

I've seen so many. Okay. Like Joe Flacco's career. Yeah. It was the, it was the Sunday night thing when they're at their best. They are the best. Yes. That's all you care about.

All right. I'll go with Family Guy. And I have a question. Do I remember correctly the Family Guy was on TV and then taken off TV? Yes. Because I remember watching Family Guy the first time was like bootleg family. Yes. It was like you guys see this underground cartoon.

Right. Like your friend came over with a trench coat of DVDs. Yes. Yeah. Family Guy got taken off and then there was a clamor for it. Yep. And then they brought it back on. That's how you know the brand is strong.

All right. PFT, you got two. Be real sure if somebody did that with Barstyl Vanthal. So my two, I'm going to go with... You might accuse me of pandering, but I'm going to go with SpongeBob. You've never seen an episode. I have seen an episode of SpongeBob. Okay.

He lives in a pineapple. Yeah. This is a... No. I'm throwing the flag. No. SpongeBob. I actually said to Liam before.

I was like, if one of us picks SpongeBob, people are going to be pissed because they know we haven't seen it. No. I've seen an episode of SpongeBob. I promise you, I just don't remember. It's that good? Yeah. If one pick on Mount Rushmore after one episode.

It's so good. It's so good. In fact, it's one of those shows that gets better with the memes. Yes. So it's like the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Yeah. Yeah. It was okay in theaters, but then the audience made it greater.

Okay. So I'm going to SpongeBob off the top. My number two, I'm going to go with Looney Tunes. It's all around classic. Okay. You can't beat those characters. Never seen. You've never seen Looney Tunes?

No. I mean, it was all... Fogspotty. Yeah. Elmer Fudd. Remember Animaniacs? Animaniacs was good, too. That was good.

Animaniacs. I can't even say it. Theme song. We'll have to wait for Revelle to sing. No, but how'd it go? Because we don't want to sing it right. We're Animaniacs, and we're Zany to the Max, Wacko Pax, Ray the Snacks, Wobble, Clinton plays the sax.

We're Animaniacs, totally insaney, Pinky and the Brainy, Animaniacs. Those are the facts. Yeah. That was good. Yeah. That was really good. All right. I can't believe it lasted to this pick second round, but I have to go with South Park.

Okay. South Park is my second pick. Bubba. You got some twisted picks there, big cat. Got some family guy in South Park. Very problematic of me. South Park, like, not all of them are funny, but the ones that are funny are, like, ridiculous. The best TV out there.

And I actually have not, like, I have not seen... I'm not one of those die-hard South Park I haven't seen ever, but, like, when you know there's a good episode, you hear about it, you watch it, you're like, that shit's good. I'll go with Rocket Power. Do you guys know that? No. I don't think that exists. Rocket Power.

I'll show you a picture. Hold on. I'll show you a picture. Hold on. Rocket Power. Who is it? Rocket. About Josh Allen's arm?

Rocket Power. I'm not going to lie, Bubba. This sounds like a really lame cartoon. No. Yeah. This...when you have to show us... Uh-huh. All right.

Bubba. Wait, that's just a rip...that's a ripoff of Rugrats. No. They're like Hawaiian. They're like... It's Hawaiian Rugrats? I don't know Rugrats. Okay.

Go Rugrats pick. Yeah. All right. I'll go with Rick and Marty. Nerd. That's a good pick. Rick and Marty is one of those cartoons that I've been told is really, really good by a lot of people, but I will never watch.

Yes. That's my solemn promise. Yeah. You see aristocrats. Yeah. Of cartoon shows. Okay. I will go with...I'll go with Doug.

I love Doug. Okay. Yeah. Doug Funny. I was a big Doug guy, too. Huge Doug guy. Roger. Yeah.

The Beats. The Beats. The Band. Patty Manez was busted, by the way. She was...no, she was not. She was... What was... Well, I'm talking about her personality.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. She was fire. She was fire friends. Yeah. But you couldn't...she's like a girl you date, don't marry. Yeah. What was the dog's name again? I can't remember.

I don't know. Rocco. No, that's Rocco's modern life. True. Yeah. Great show as well. Quail Man. Quail Man was the best.

Okay. If you grew up in the 90s and you didn't at one point, you know, take a belt, take your dad's belt and put it around your head, pretend you're a quail man. Wow, it sounds like you had an interesting childhood. You weren't a child of the 90s. Yeah. Okay. No big deal.

Discipline a little different in the cat's household. For my two, I'm going to go with Beavis and Butthead, shocked at last at this long. Good. Without Beavis and Butthead, there would be no South Park. There would be no Family Guy. And then for my last one, I'm going to go with Space Ghost. Space Ghost was a great, great show. Him and Brack and the...

Wait, I got Breaking Moves. This is actually a huge Breaking Moves. Go. Do it. Breaking Moves. I'm sorry, PFT. I hate breaking up the Mount Rushmore. You will agree that I have to say this.

Former Louisville coach Rick Petino says he is starting a podcast in conjunction with his forthcoming book due out on September 4th. Oh, yes. Oh, I can't wait. Petino even plans to start a Twitter account. Rick Petino, listen to me right now. Do not create a Twitter account. You are not going to survive Twitter.com.

This is not going to work. Rick, he is going to hate it. He is going to be... Rick, we've discussed this. You've got a body that's built for Vine. Rick. Not a mind that's built for Twitter. Rick, do not create a Twitter account.

This is going to be a blood... Well, semen bath, but the same thing. It's going to be a bath of semen. Oh, my God. I'm sorry. I had to... Hey, this is Rick Petino podcast. Today, we're produced by OneWipe Charlie's Dude Wipes.

True. Great product. Listen, I'm telling you, Dude Wipes, they are everything that you need. Get yourself all cleaned up. Okay. Anyways, back to the program. Oh, my God. I mean, you agree I had to say that.

No, that's good. Yeah, no, I appreciate you bursting in with that. He's going to have a fucking podcast. Oh, my God. We got to get him as a guest. Yes, we do. This is actually our chance to get Rick Petino as a guest. Yes.

We'll do a swap cast. Yes. Absolutely. Also known as Snowball. Yeah. So for my last... Oh, no, I did... I took Space Coast with my last one.

So Space Coast Coast Coast. Okay. So what is Space Coast? Space Coast Coast Coast. I don't remember it. With Space Coast doing... He did a talk show on Cartoon Network. Okay.

From Coast to Coast. Yeah. Okay. Wow. Space Coast. You were too busy watching Real House. Why is it Bethany Beach or whatever? That didn't exist yet.

I was too busy tying a belt around my head. Putting your head inside your dad's belt. Yeah. So for my last one, I'm going to go... There's a ton out there. I'm going to go with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Okay. That was my favorite.

Who are you? What kind of guy were you? I was a party dude. Michelangelo. Really? Yeah. Loser. So you were just like out to lunch all the time.

Not actually trying to fucking do anything. Cowabunga. Correct. I was Raphael. Crude but rude. Raphael? He was the biggest nerd on the whole... No.

Donatello, right? Donatello. Raphael was the bad boy. No. He was the certified bad boy. He was in trouble. His weapons were forks. Yeah.

But do you realize like... He was like the Mike Greenberg of Ninja Turtles. He was a badass. Like without Raphael, they would never even had to fight anyone. Because Raphael would always get them into jams and get them out of them. No. Who are you, Bubba? I have no idea.

Oh Jesus Christ. You're too young. God damn it. That's such a Donatello answer. Yeah. Alright, sure. Bebop. I was Samantha.

Yeah. I was April O'Neill. I'll go with... Do you think they all fucked her? Not at once. But like they all had crushes on her. I think Leonardo fucked her. Yeah.

I mean, Michelangelo was hot for her too though at times. Yeah. They might have fucked once. Okay. I don't know. I mean, I don't want to think about this too long, but there's a chance that April O'Neill got a train ran on her. Maybe Splinter was one of them.

But they're brothers. Yeah. So what? That's kind of fucked up. Alright. Okay. Go ahead. Bubba, what's your last pick?

I'll go with Hey Arnold. That's a great pick. What do we leave off? Honorable mentions. We left off Flintstones. Flintstones. Just a good one. Just as a classic.

Rocky and Bullwinkle was another big one. I liked Rocky and Bullwinkle. Ren and Stimpy. Yeah. Rocco's Modern Life, which we mentioned. Those were kind of... Those were like flashing the pans almost. Let me ask this.

Were you a King of Hill guy or not? I wasn't. I like King of the Hill. Really? It's one of those ones that you're either a big fan or you're not. Yeah. No, it's definitely true. Inspector Gadget.

Like Inspector Gadget. Okay. Hey Arnold. Jimmy Neutron. What about... Oh, boy genius. Don't know that one. Recess.

Remember recess? Yeah. Recess was great. Recess was great. Let's see. What else? Pinky and the Brain? Yeah, Pinky.

Well, that was part of anime. Pinky and the Brain. They were subset. Pinky and the Brain. One's the comic books. One's the genius. Yeah. No, one is...

Is that what it is? Pinky and the Brain. What was it? One Recomic Books? You're trying to take over the world. What do you want to do today? Yeah. I'm going to put a comment I had on my list.

Not because I've ever watched it. Did you try to be a hipster? But it's the exact same thing as Rick and Morty. Where like so many people have told me that it's really good. Yes. But I've just never seen it. Yeah. There's a lot of buzz.

Yeah. What else would we miss, Liam? Anything else? Bobsburgers. Okay. I've also heard that's good. Yeah. I haven't seen much of it.

I'm going to pull Mike Frances on you. I've heard of it. But I've never seen it. Mm-hmm. Heard of it though. Anything else? No. That's it.

What do you think Hank would have picked? Hank probably would have gone Rocket League. Is that the name? Yeah. Rocket Power. Rocket Power. Rocket Power. He would have gone with Dora the Explorer.

Let's actually do Hank's four right now. We'll put it up there. Yeah. Hank. Dora the Explorer. Rocket League. Rocket Power. Hank took Daria.

Daria for sure. Oh, he's such a fucking Daria guy. And then last pick for Hank is going to be... Like Ed Ed and Eddie. What's that? What's that? Ed and Eddie? Yeah.

Doesn't that sound like something? It's like a cartoon network. It was like three brothers. Yes. That's definitely... Oh, Ed Ed and Eddie. Yeah. Not Ed Ed and Eddie.

And Hank would be like, that show was fired. That's a great name for a pizza restaurant, by the way. Ed Ed and Eddie's. Yeah, that is good. The brothers. Three brothers. Well, no, mine was... Why are you looking at me?

The last name is Ed and Eddie. No, but Ed Ed and Eddie are all three brothers. They were all just named Edward. It sounds like Rick Petino's co-host for his podcast. George Foreman's sons. This is Ed Ed and Eddie. George Foreman's sons are all George Foreman. Got all the pizza sauce you can imagine.

Yeah. Come here. Have a little... Have a little gravy. Have a little of this white gravy over here. You know, God damn it, Rick Petino's got a podcast. Today's show is brought to you by Blue Apron and their delicious vanilla milkshakes. Ed Ed and Eddie?

Yeah. You're gonna love it. I'm Rick Petino's guy. You know, his guy. Don't worry about it. Don't ask questions. I'm his guy. He trusts me too much.

That's his only mistake. I'm his fixer. Okay. This also just proves that when we do the show is always like, we are just, we're at the mercy of the internet because if we had started this show a little earlier, we would have been the lead. And if we had started, or sorry, if we started the show a little later, it would have been the lead.

And if we started the show two hours ago, we'd never even would have seen it. Today's show is brought to you by Cash App, the easiest way to pay for an abortion crossing state lines. Yes. You just one click at the button. You trying to get that five star recruit, but you don't want to get it traced. Go to cash app, download the cash app and you can get the number one recruit in all of Kentucky.

I swear. So that rat fuck Cal Parry doesn't keep getting his guys. Listen, I swear by these Mugsy jeans, they, they wash out so quickly, so fast. Yeah. You'd swear you were just wearing plastic pants. It is an incredible product. I can't recommend enough. You put on a pair of me undies and that stain, it will stick around for a little bit, but

it dries pretty quick. If you know what I'm saying, we should just do Rick Petino's podcast before he does it. Yeah. Let's just release its own podcast feed and just cuckum. Listen to me. I had it in for me. Okay. I'm here to tell you the truth.

Yeah. Hey, listen, Rick. He just loves guys too much. He don't know nothing. His only, his only fault. He, listen, he's gonna, I'm gonna apologize for his apology because he didn't do anything. You son of a, I coach Marcus Canby. Okay.

I coach Marcus Canby. Oh, fuck. Rick Petino has a podcast. I love 2018. Joe Rogan is not walking through that door. Dude, can you imagine him doing these reads and like trying to talk about guests and like the whole thing is just going to be him talking. How many, how quickly do you think he will invoke 9-11?

Oh God. It's going to be fast. That might be when it debuts. Yeah. So God, Jesus Christ. I'm laughing, but I'm not because it's probably true. Yeah. Oh man.

Let's get to our interviews. We have Rob Cordray and Joe Thomas coming up. It's actually brought to you by the cash app. The cash app is the number one app. It's a, you can download it. You can link it to your bank account. You can get direct deposit from your employer. You can get the cash card.

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We're also brought to you by Bud Light, Bud Light, Lime and Orange. They're out. Bud Light, Lime and Orange are brewed with real orange and lime peels. It's famous among friends. We love our sponsor, Bud Light, Bud Light, Lime and Orange. Delicious summer beer. It's refreshing. You get that real taste of lime and orange.

Bud Light, Lime and Orange. Go check them out. Brewed with real orange and lime peels. Okay. Here he is. Rob Cordry. All right. We now welcome on special guest Rob Cordry, baller season four coming out August 12th.

So he's doing the little press tour right now. And we wanted to talk to you about your career, but we had to get the most important question out there first. How cool is the rock? Does he ever talk about us? Yeah. Okay. Cool.

I wouldn't be surprised if he did. Like he's just that guy. No, he's great, man. He's everything you imagine and want him to be. Yes, I believe. That's a long list. Oh, you're skeptical. It's very satisfying.

No, no, no. I'm just curious because like the rock seems to be everybody's best friend. He seems to know everybody. Yeah. Does he, is he that good with like names, faces, or is he like, hey, buddy, chief, pal. I don't know about the names and the faces. We had a conversation about that, how, you know, everybody that, when you're in the business, like you meet a lot of people and you might not remember everybody's name and, and I think

guys are really bad at that to begin with. Like women are smarter than us. Yes. Like they are good with this. Well, they listen. And they listen. There you go. They listen.

And yeah, my head's just stuck too far up my own ass to like hear names or see faces. But he, yeah, I forget what the story is. So this will be very unsatisfying, but, but he, he often gets himself, himself into pickles just like we do. Right. And, but he's like such a magnetic dude that he'll, he gets himself out of it easier than we can. I would imagine.

Well, it's hard to be like, hey, rock, what the fuck, man, why didn't you, you know, remember my name? No one's going to do that. Yeah. I love it when people do that to me though. They go like, I bet you don't remember my name. Do you? And it's like, and I don't, but I'm going to go, yeah, I do.

And you know what? I'm not playing your game. Yeah. Why don't you tell me what your name is? Yeah, I'm not playing. I don't think you know your name. I'm not. I get immediately superior.

Well, I've actually read a couple of interviews with you where you talk about how you sometimes get typecast because you play like a dick a lot. You play an asshole, a lovable asshole sometimes. The rock is like the exact opposite. The rock always plays like a superhero. You guys should like kind of switch roles for an episode and ballers where you play like the rocks, like gentler, handler, and he's just like a dick and everybody hates him.

I would like to see the rock kind of like step out a little bit and be an anti-hero. Yeah. I don't know if he, I don't know what that would even look like him playing like a kind of a, the anti-hero, like the bad guy in a way. I mean, he always plays characters that are flawed, right? Right. That have, but really sympathetic flaws. Somebody that I don't, I could not imagine him playing an unsympathetic character.

Yeah. It's hard. It is hard to think about that. I mean, I obviously rooted for Stone Cold over him back in the day, but that was because Stone Cold was, you know, the people's champion. Stone Cold was Stone Cold. Yeah. Exactly.

So ballers. I want to quickly talk. You could not smell what the rock was cooking. No. Absolutely not. The kids put it sideways and tick it up your candy ass. That's right. That was when the WWE was the real shit.

Somebody like, season one yelled that to him to Dwayne when we were shooting something at a car and somebody went, I can smell what you're cooking. And he laughed and I went out. What was that? And he's like, and he, he, he, he, he just realized at that one moment that I had never watched wrestling. Yeah. He's like, what's going on?

And I was, he's like, that's just something I said in wrestling. That's basically a whole part of my life. I didn't, didn't, didn't check in. Yeah. I thought everyone just called him a rooty poo candy ass because they ate it. Yeah. They were just friends with him. That's weird.

They wouldn't bust your balls so much. Just guys. So season four, I had a question about season three. So in season three, your character tried to stop Vince from doing Medellin. Why, why'd you do that? Because I thought he was just too pretty. Yeah. And Aquaman was a better role.

Yeah. I would agree with that. Do you ever get mad though that people, because I, listen, we're from the dumb brain side of this table. We see a show on HBO, it's guys, it's athletes, it's cameos, and we're like, oh, so that's just entourage. And it's made by the same people. Yes.

Yeah. It's entourage. That's peach. No, I understand it. I think I, because I'm just so like deep into the show, you know, that I, I, I see fewer similarities than a lot of people do. But I, I appreciate the shorthand of it. Like it is definitely just like entourage was a deep dive into the show biz.

This is with sports, which is awesome. I just think sports is more, um, that has better legs. You know what I mean? It's, there's more there than show biz, show biz just kind of like, it's the snake eating its own tail. Right. You know? Um, but in, but in, in football, you know, like you'll read an article, like somebody

tours ACO. And that's it. That's the fray. It's not even a sentence. It's a phrase. Um, but this show is about like all the drama that led up to that and follows that tear and like what that does to that person's life and everybody around, around them. So it's just like endless material.

Yeah. And no, that's actually a good point because you do see a guy cares ACL and then for the next, yeah, for the next year, he's just not heard of. Yeah. And it's like, what is he going through? What is he dealing with day to day? Like, oh, Victor Cruz, right? Like a couple, can you imagine what that dude's life was like during that injury?

Because that was brutal. Um, you know, so, uh, yeah, it's, uh, it's, it's, it's pretty interesting to like get a little peek behind the curtain. Yeah. Who's the, uh, who's the loudest person on set? Is it the rock or is it Jay Glazer? T sizzle. Oh, glazes pretty, glazes pretty loud.

Yeah. Um, cause he's a, he's a tiny little guy. Mm hmm. Short, short man. Um, but he's, uh, he's, um, uh, yeah, big personality and a really good guy too. Who's the best cameo that's come through that you're like, wow, or do you even have that happen anymore? Cause you, you know, you've been in a ton of stuff, but I still get like, you know,

athletes, though, yeah, um, I'm easily starstruck by athletes that I like, um, who came to Oh, I met Gronk. I'm a big Pats fan. Apologies. He probably thought it was entourage. Yeah. He definitely was confused. He was just wandering around.

Yeah. He was like, baby bro. Yeah. He's like, this is just part of my day. Yeah. And, uh, the guy's eight and a half feet tall about, and, um, and, uh, I don't think he wasn't even shooting. He just came to set.

He is like that. He's like that. We did a video like three or four years ago where we did a ice skating and he was the judge and after he came to the locker room and he just sat there laughing at our jokes for an hour. Like, and we weren't even saying anything funny. He was just laughing at us. Is there any, have you ever had a more satisfying day?

Right. You don't have to do anything to make Gronk laugh. It doesn't exist. Just make a fart noise if things get dull. Right. There should be just a drug that just makes you feel like Rob Gronkowski. Yes. Just put yourself in his brain for this.

It's even like got a name. You get Gronked. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm so Gronked. Yeah. Man.

So Gronked. So Gronked. Um, so the, uh, back to your like before ballers, uh, Jon Stewart, how is he as a boss? Oh, great. Great. Uh, another one that like, he's another one of those guys that is kind of everything you'd imagine. He, um, his, his serious side though is really kind of like he's, it's very intimidating

in a way or it was when I first started there because there's no smarter guy in the room. And, um, and you really feel that like the way he, his, his very specific, like you'll have a take on a joke or a story and he will have what seems like the complete opposite take, but you immediately know it's the right one. Um, it's, it's really, uh, it was wild watching that guy work. Yeah. And he's a good guy. Yeah.

He's the kind of guy that like he, like just outside right here at your bullpen, uh, you know, he's, he's always tossing a football around to like a PA before he goes out. Right. He's that kind of guy. And do you like when the Daily Show, I mean, it was so good, like the heyday of the Daily Show was so next level. Did you guys feel that working on it? This is, we're doing something that hasn't been done and is so kind of next level from

what everyone else is doing. To a certain extent. Yeah. Like, but we, you know, we kind of shunned it and in the way that comedians do, like people would say they, they get their news from us and I wasn't taking any responsibility for that whatsoever. Right. You know, I was just like, look, I'm not, I'm a dick joke, I don't get your news from

me. Right. We, I, cause I was a big fan of the show from the very beginning, like, like, um, kill born days. Uh, so I knew that it was a different show and that it evolved and I was there and I was lucky enough to be there. So it was definitely, you know, there's one, this is the moment. All right.

It was the, it was the Democratic convention, I believe was in New York or was it the Republican? I don't know. 2004, I think. And um, um, I forgot my ID and I couldn't get in a Madison Square Garden and I was sitting there and there was a bunch of producers there and I had to get in there and I had an interview with like, I had to get the story we had come to their get. And um, my producer goes, yeah, he doesn't have his ID, but will that do? And he points to a big billboard, a Madison Square Cup, the Daily Showcast and the security

guy was like, yeah, yeah, go ahead. That's awesome. That was like, okay, this is something. What a flash. This is something. I tried that once when I forgot my ID at our Super Bowl party last year and I tried to take a flight back to New York and I tried to Google myself and I was like, does this work?

And the guy was like, are you fucking serious? We don't take, we don't take, we don't take the fuck out of here, dude. Were you surprised he walked away when he did? Uh, no. I'm surprised he lasted that long. I mean, what a job. Make a look at him, his first show and then look at him, his second show. He's, he's like a president, you know, like the presidency ages people, sports bloggers.

Oh my God. He went from like no gray in his hair to completely gray and it's exhausting. I did the show as a guest, like his last few months, right? I was on the couch and, um, excuse me, um, and he sat down, I was getting my makeup on, he sat down and he goes, so, um, you know, I'm leaving pretty soon. What's it like to, uh, get up in the morning, uh, around the same time your family does and then get home at a decent hour and have dinner with them? And I was like, it's fantastic.

You're gonna love it. Yeah. Yeah. You just live the other side of the world, basically. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, he just, he's like, nah, I look forward to meeting my kids. Yeah.

You know? So I think when you quit a talk show, you have to grow like a nice beard and then just like wear sweats all the time. Yeah. Because you can. Yeah. Because John Stuart also is like, I don't know if he owns a suit. Like does, you know, the, he had a wardrobe person that would suit him up and he would

wait till the last second to put that suit on because he wore the same thing every single day. He wore these like, um, you know, whatever, khaki pants, boots. He had a leather jacket that he would wear in the winter and sort of like a, I don't know, turquoise-ish blue, some in the family of turquoise t-shirt. Yeah. And I once was at his office and he had a stack of new t-shirts that were all the same color.

That same color. And I was like, are you really branching out, huh? I love it. That's like a certain level of being rich slash famous like Zuckerberg. You're like, hey, listen, I can wear the same thing every day and what are you gonna say about it? You're not gonna call me like, you know, like if I wear the same thing every day, eventually people are like, yo dude, you kind of smell, you look bad, but like if you get to a certain

level, no one's gonna say anything. Well, I don't know, man. I, I, I kind of appreciate it in the way that I'm mostly wearing, um, I'm mostly wearing like, uh, I mostly wear jeans and a white button-down shirt. And if I've got now like four pairs, four button-down shirts all white in my closet, because then I just don't have to think about it. Right. I just, I just put it, it's just relaxing.

It's like, uh, that's one, it's one, it's barely stressful to pick out your clothes on the morning, but it's something. Yeah. Once I make it, I'm just gonna wear a new pair of socks every day. Yes. A fresh pair of socks. Uh, new condom every time too. My day's new.

You're not gonna reuse them. You're not gonna reuse them. I get that paycheck. Yeah. Um, who do you think, that was like a murderous row of comedians that worked on that show. It was like, you guys had such a great cast. Who do you think was the funniest person that contributed? Oh my God.

Did the Daily Show? Yeah. Uh, it would have to be, I would have to say, uh, Carell or Colbert. Yeah. Yeah. Colbert is, um, he's just like John in that. Steve was more like, uh, he's an actor, comedian, he, the news angle of it wasn't as important to him.

So I would only put Colbert above him because Colbert's like lifeblood, and still is today on his show now, and his show between the Daily Show and his, um, is, is, is taking the newspaper in the morning and turning it into crystallizing it into jokes by 5.30. Right. Right. He, he calls it the joke pipe. Like he sets what he loves sending things down the joke pipe, um, and he just, he lives for it.

Yeah. It sounds like he's just cooking meth. Yeah. From that description. He also cooks great meth. Really good meth. Really, really like some of the best. Uh, light blue.

Uh-huh. So sweet. So sweet. Uh, was it competitive? Was it? Were there egos? Was it competitive? No.

Come on. No. Tell us who you hated the most. Haha. Who I hated the most. Yeah. Uh, uh, Matt Walsh. Yeah.

Screw that guy. Riggle. Riggle. Riggle. I think he's kind of in a similar spot in their career, trying to take the next step. I think comedy shows have that reputation because of Saturday Night Live. Yeah. And Saturday Night Live, I don't even think it's like that anymore, but it's, Chevy

Chase ruined it for everyone. Yeah. It's Chevy Chase's fault. Yeah. It's Chevy Chase's fault. Chevy Chase was such a colossal dickhead. He ruined everything. Everything since then.

Everyone's like, oh, you have to be a dickhead to be in this, you know, show business. Chevy Chase, man. I once, I was on a train coming back from Comic-Con and the community cast. Uh, got, no, was it community? Yeah. He was on community. Community cast got on and I loved that show. I had done it a couple of times and I was like, oh, these guys are my friends.

And then Chevy walked on and I hid. Riggle. I hid and I was like, I'm, I'm hiding from Chevy Chase. Yeah. This is stupid. Yeah. What am I, he's like one of my, he has like an icon. He was one of my comic influences growing up and now I'm in a train hiding my face.

Yeah. The roast of him was great because it was nobody that really knew him. It was brutal. Right. And then they just were up there like, Chevy, you're just a dick. Yeah, you're a dick. We all know. And he was like, fair.

Fair, no. That's his like, cause I did hot tub with him and that is pretty much his, his ammo. Like he's just like, whatever. He does this thing. We had dinner with him a couple of times where he would like stick his finger in your mashed potatoes, but make it like he was pointing at them. He goes, how is that? Is that good?

Classic gag. Chevy chase. Yeah. Just classic. Like boiled down to its essence. Yeah. It's slapstick. You know, Chevy, there are no cameras on us.

Sweet. So you guys weren't competitive? No, no, no, no. I don't know what it is. I actually credit the UCB to this sort of like evolution of comedy these days. It's the, it's the, everyone gets a trophy culture. Millennials. Sort of.

Everyone gets a headline. Actually, I would say it's more of like an alley-oop culture. Okay. So make your, make your scene partner look good and you will look good by default. Okay. So let's say it's alley-oop culture. That makes sense. Yeah.

I like that. How do you think you would have approached dealing with like everything that's going on politics now with Trump and the White House, if you're on The Daily Show right now? Oh my God. It seems like you got to walk a line between delivering lines for applause and delivering lines that are like genuinely satirical and funny. How do you, how do you, and then if you go more towards like the comedic slant than people are like, why aren't you taking a harder stand?

If you go towards a harder stand, they're like, why aren't you funny? So how, how would, how do you approach that? Well first of all, like when I was on the show at least, I don't know what it's like now or what I think shows have gotten way more political. But I always, our philosophy was always like just the shortest route to the funniest joke. The issues be damned. So, but today I would, I would, I wouldn't in a million years want to, want to be doing The Daily Show right now.

I'm so glad I got out. I think about it a lot and it makes me nervous. Like I did Sam B's show about a year, a year and a half ago and she's so stressed out. She was just like, she was like, not, could not smile, could not even force a smile. And I was like, are you okay? And she went, Rob, I am teetering on the ledge of democracy. Geez. Whoa, whoa.

And I was like, oh, thank God, I'm the dick joke guy. What an answer. It sounds like us, we, we stay, stick to sports at all times. Just stick to sports, man. That's a hell of an answer. Like, hey, how's it going? Like, oh yeah, my weekend was good. No, I'm teetering on.

Teetering on the ledge of democracy. Another day of protecting the Republic. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I don't, I can't imagine any of them are having like the best time. Yes. Yes. All right.

So we got to wrap up in a minute. I wanted to, we wanted to do something real quick, hot take, sorry, hot tub time machine is one of your most famous movies. So we wanted to do a hot take time machine, your sports fan, and do our takes that we used to have, like maybe as kids that really sucked and we look back and we're like, damn, that was really dumb. So we can go first. You can take them away.

All right. So PFT, do you have one? Okay. Mine was going to be that Grant Hill wasn't the best player on that Duke team. I like that. So I remember watching that Duke. I think he won two national championships, like when he was a freshman and then we, he's a senior, I think.

Yeah. There was another hill on the team. Yeah. I forget the other hill's name, but I was like, the other hill's better than Grant Hill. That's, I mean, that's just going, going against the grain. Yeah. Just going against the grain turns out, well, Grant Hill, you know, he was kind of injury

plagued when he got the NBA. Yes. So the jury's still out. Maybe that take was actually right. Yeah. When I was, when I was growing up, my favorite was I got addicted to the MVP or like star athlete being a choke artist with John L. Way. John L. Way was like my, when he lost that game against the Jaguars and I think the first

round of the AFC playoffs, I was like, this guy will never win the big one. Like he stinks. He's good in the regular season, puts up all these numbers. He can never win the big one. And then I was proven very wrong with the end of his career. So, but it was good. It was, it was like a, it was like getting addicted to like, you know, like a, a drug. It's like, oh man, you find the guy, like the Peyton Manning was an ex, Hayrod LeBron

was like the best when he didn't win. Yep. It was the best. Yeah. Um, all right. Do it. I think I get it. I, I'm not sure.

I, uh, it, does this count? Like there was part of me as a growing up a Red Sox fan that didn't want them to ever win a World Series. That's a good one. That's a good one. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I think Boston would have turned into the most insufferable sports town in America. Everybody would have paged you guys hypothetically. Hypothetically speaking. Yeah. Come on. Philly's worse than we are. Uh, Philly, I'll say this. Philly is turning into Boston at an astounding pace.

Yeah. Totally. They, they, in the last like six months since they won that Super Bowl, they're rapidly approaching Red Sox. Yeah. It's so funny. Like we were, the Red Sox, when they were losers, they were always good guys. You know, like I was always rooting for a good guy and I wasn't as big a football fan

then as I am now. But now, and I couldn't imagine how somebody could root for the Yankees. Like they're the bad guys. Right. And, um, and, and now I root for the Patriots and just love, love rooting for the villain. I love it. Right. I get it now.

I get the thrill. Yeah. I thought that the Red Sox actually got addition by subtraction by not getting a rod because Trot Nixon had a hot bat. Man, that's a deep cut for like a month. There was also a while where, uh, I think it was, they had a pull on ESPN where 40 or 45% of America thought that David X-Teen, you would rather have David X-Teen on your team than A-Rod.

He hustled. He hustled. He was, he was. All right. He sprinted to first base when he got walked. Yeah. Uh, I mean, David X-Teen for sure. The cow, you know, he was one of the all time grit guys.

All right. Last question is the Seeky question. Put in promo code take. If you get $10 off Seeky purchase, you want to go see comedy, want to go see a concert, a baseball game, football is coming back, Seeky promo code take. You were an Eagle Scout. That's right. It was like being a nerd.

Stay alive. Oh, is it Scout for Life? Oh, it's Scout for Life, man. Oh, damn. It's like, you're an Eagle Scout. You're always an Eagle Scout. I was told when I got my Eagle Scout that I am a marked man. Yeah.

Literally. What are those words? What is it? Like, so can you make a fire? Like right now? Yeah. Fire. I'll burn this place down.

What's the coolest thing that Eagle Scout can do? Name something, dude. Weave a basket. You need it. You need it. Yeah. Weave a basket. And then light it on fire.

I'll make you a raft. Can you get us home if we're lost in the woods? Hell yeah. North Star? Yeah. Which side of the tree does Moss grow on? The one facing the other way. Yeah.

That's true. The opposite of where you think. The same side on all of them. Yeah. That's true. That's actually a fact. One thing, one little talent I do have that impressed my kids was, we were hiking once and I was like, we're getting closer to the top of the mountain because the trees are

shorter. And they were like, oh, shit. Wow. Dad's like a Native American guide. Damn. Eagle Scout. Wow. Look, there's Indian paintbrush.

It's a scruffy over there, yeah. You dog must still be close by, his shit's still warm. Yeah. So do you use it? Do you use Eagle Scout stuff? Yeah. Well, you know, I just went camping in Wyoming. One of the remotest places in the continental U.S., we took a pack trip on horses up there.

And yeah, every day, the Wranglers, these guys, this guy's a cowboy for real. And he was like, he wore spurs. And he was like, hey, Rob, you can build a fire, right? I was like, hell yeah, I can. Hell yeah. Scout's on it. He's like, go for it. And he just walked away and did his own thing.

And I made a, I got to build a fire every night. The peak of masculinity right there. And it's a pleasure to burn. Yes. Oh yeah. You're just like, that's my fire. I love it. You like it?

And by the way, great wood up there in Wyoming. Yes. Oh yeah. Extra. Oh, oh, oh. Hot, burns hot, and burns slow. You got some tinder up there? What'd you use for tinder?

Tinder? Oh, okay. Yeah, you want to talk tinder? You want to talk tinder? Yeah, let's talk tinder. So there are these, they have evergreen trees that grow up there. When you use the brown, the brown, the dead leaves. Yeah.

Needles, they're called needles. They go up like, yeah, the needles, thank you. That I never learned getting my Eagle Scout badge, what those are called. They go up like gasoline, which we used to call Boy Scout water. Nice. Oh, that's, oh, I know what you're talking about when there's the forest fires. This one, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Well, that's all you're doing is making a little tiny forest fire. Yeah, exactly. If you think about it like that, if you think about it like that, you'll never fail. Right. One time I had too much trash on my porch in college and I just lit it all on fire. So that's basically the same thing as a Eagle Scout. It's the same exact thing. Get rid of it that way.

Yeah. All right. Rob Cordray, thank you so much. Ballers, season four. You guys said you were going to war. Is that true? Going to war? Yeah.

And the promo for ballers, season four. We're going to war. Is that true? Yeah, sure. So how was war? It's hell. Thank you for your service. There you go.

War is hell. That's a quote. Quote that. War is hell, Rob Cordray. Yeah. Talking about ballers, season four. There you go. All right.

Thanks, man. Thank you guys. Appreciate it. That interview with Rob Cordray is brought to you guys by Blue Apron. You sick of going out to these restaurants. You might want to get a table for two, get a two-top. Take your date out there for a while, have a nice little meal, some foreplay, some dinner, and then a little afterwards play as well for a brief period of time.

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Blue Apron, it's a better way to cook. And now we've got Joe Thomas talking about hot knocks. All right. We now welcome on a recurring guest in front of the program. It is Joe Thomas, 10-time pro bowler. He just retired last year. This is his first season without football. He's got a podcast.

It's coming back from summer break. It's called the Tomahawk podcast. You've got to download it right now. How was the summer? You just took a nice summer break. Wish we could be that lucky, huh? Yeah. You know, when you grind as hard as I do and you have such a highly rated podcast, you

got to get away from it a little bit. You know, you got to recharge the batteries and get ready for a big football season. So I've spent a lot of the summer in Wisconsin up north enjoying the sights and sounds of God's country there in northern Wisconsin, but I'm ready for football to start. Love it. You've also lost some weight, haven't you? I lost a little bit. Yeah, man.

I got on that sunshine diet and lost about 50 pounds and I'm feeling a heck of a lot better than I did when I was 300. Are you, what's the goal? Are you going to lose another? I think you said you were going to lose 70, right? I think right now my goal is about 245, 250. So I'm right there. I mean, if I lost another five pounds, I'd be happy, but I'm kind of just happy with

where I am and I'm just going to take it easy. I'm not going to go crazy and try to lose too much more and just try to stabilize here. You guys are like the bizarro version of our podcast. You actually know what you're talking about when it comes to football and you lose weight. Yeah. You guys gain weight? Is that what you're trying to say? I fluctuate.

I fluctuate. Are you just living off the high of everyone? Because I'm sure anytime someone comes up to you, they just, the first words out of their mouth, wow, you look great. Yeah, usually I follow that up with this. You know, I appreciate you saying that because it's better than saying, hey man, you look like crap. You gained a lot of weight.

Yeah. True. I get that a lot. You must be like, I must have looked like shit every other time you saw me. Yeah. I always get the people come up like, you're not as fat as I thought you were, which is like pretty much saying you're still fat, but you're not as sloppy. So I'm like, is that a compliment?

Okay, whatever. That's fine. That works. So I want to get into a little bit of actual football because football is officially back. It's like the first Robin of Spring, the first episode of Hard Knocks came out. Last night, we're actually taping this on Tuesday before it comes out. But I wanted to talk to you about that for a little bit. Are you a little bit disappointed that you didn't get to be involved in Hard Knocks?

Not really. I think as a lineman, we try to just stay out of the spotlight and we're not super excited about being the stars of any of those TV shows. So I think it's really disruptive in training camp to have those cameras in your faces at all times when you're trying to have private conversations. So I'm happy that during my time, we never had any of the Hard Knocks distractions. I hope to God that the distractions of the camera doesn't affect the Browns on the field because they could, oh no, they didn't win a game last year.

So never mind. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I was thinking. You know, can you imagine what would have happened if we had Hard Knocks last year? Yeah, true. Where we would have been, the season would have been off the rails.

Yeah, it would have been a bad season. What a bad scene. It would have been terrible. So we haven't seen the first episode of Hard Knocks yet. You haven't either unless they gave you like a pre-release, did they? No. I have not. I have not seen anything yet.

All right. So we want to do some predictions and we want to throw some things out there that you can hopefully help us with being Cleveland Brown for as many years as you were. Every Hard Knocks, there is a breakout star on the coaching staff, usually the strength coach, but I think we had the guy who just snapped the balls to everyone for the Rams Rock. He might have been the strength coach. Can I make a prediction on who the breakout star is going to be?

And Joe, you can tell me if I'm right or wrong. Bob Wiley. I believe you are correct. If I had to guess, he is the guy, in my opinion, that's the most interesting. He's the most funny, gregarious, he's the most seasoned coach on that staff. He's been in the NFL like 30-some years. He's actually, believe it or not, the guy that still writes the plays for Madden Football. And he's made a ton of money doing it.

He's been doing it since day one. He's good friends with John Madden. He knows everybody in the NFL. He's got a million great stories. So if I had to say there's going to be one breakout star, it'd be Bob Wiley. So everyone who plays Madden has the Browns playbook. Yeah, pretty much. Maybe that's why we went to 16 last year.

Could be an issue. Yeah, he does magic too, doesn't he? He's the offensive line coach, by the way. Yeah. Yeah, he does magic. He's this great big man with a bigger heart and a big personality. He's got this huge mustache. He kind of looks a little bit like a walrus.

And he's just the nicest guy with the most funny jokes. And he's also extremely knowledgeable about football. And I think people aren't going to fall in love with him. OK, so that's definitely the odds on favorite. What talk to us about your strength coach? Is he going to be, is he someone who we're going to fall in love with? Is he a true football guy? You know, I think he's a football guy.

I'm not sure they're going to feature him too much. He's the guy that actually just got here in the spring, so he's new. And I don't really know him too well. I met him a few times in the spring. But I feel like there's enough other personalities out there on that coaching staff that he probably won't be featured quite as much. What about Hugh? What's our reaction going to be to Hugh?

Because from an outsider's perspective, when I think of Hugh Jackson, I think of a guy that spends like a lot of his time on the phone with reporters and maybe doesn't have a huge personality. I think he'd be wrong. Actually, I think outside of Bob Wiley, I think Hugh Jackson will probably be that next guy that becomes the face of the Brown Tartanus because he's got a lot of personality. He loves talking off the cuff. He's very passionate.

He really loves his players and he shows it. And I think truly, I think he might be the other guy. But it's not Bob Wiley. It'll probably be Hugh Jackson being maybe a big focal point because he is a guy that has a boatload of personality and players love him. OK. All right. Interesting because I did not think that was going to be the case.

What about Baker Mayfield's RV? We know it's going to be featured. When you saw that story, as someone who spent so many, a decade plus in the locker room, what would the reaction be from Offense Alignment if the quarterbacks have an RV in the parking lot that they go and hang out in? It made me a little jealous, first off, because actually my first couple of years in the NFL, the old line had the RV in the parking lot. And we'd go in there and play cards and take naps and tell fart jokes and do offensive

line type stuff. And it kind of went away. And so for my next nine years of my career, we didn't have anything. So it's kind of cool that it's coming back with Baker Mayfield. But I wonder if they're going to let us into the RV or if that's sort of like the X-rated zone that they're not allowed to have cameras. Yeah. I don't know.

Interesting story. Also just the whole dynamic between Baker and Tyrod going into this one, because everyone's saying Tyrod is going to be the guy, he's going to be the guy. But very clearly, you don't draft a guy, number one, if you don't plan on him starting at some point. And I think I read that the Browns have their first two games against the Saints and the Steelers this year. So that could be a tough stretch.

Do you think that, what do you think that dynamic is going to be like between a guy like Tyrod and Baker? Well, they've got a guy in John Dorsey as the general manager who two times in his career has very successfully sat down first round picks and let them have at least one maybe more than one year of learning with Aaron Rodgers when he was in Green Bay behind Red Farve. And then again, last year with Patrick Mahomes and Alex Smith when he was in Kansas City. So I feel like John Dorsey is a guy that he's willing to weather the storm.

He's willing to understand that sometimes for a rookie, it's best to sit him down and let him learn and let him watch because there's a lot for a rookie quarterback to learn. And when you're a rookie quarterback and you're in preseason and you're in training camp, a lot of times you're going to look really good because everything's happening the way the coach told you it's going to happen. Everything's happening the way it did in college with the coverages and there's not as much disguise. But all of a sudden you go to a game and in a game when you're a quarterback, maybe

50% of the stuff that happens out there, stuff that you didn't practice, you didn't prepare for and you just have to fall back on prior experiences and going through those learning curves. And so I think that's something that a rookie, he's not able to prepare for and it's something that you have to just be in the NFL for some amount of time and either watch it or actually live those experiences. So I think it is a little bit dangerous for us to watch what a rookie does in training camp or in the preseason and then try to extrapolate that into the regular season because really

the regular season and preseason and training camp is completely different from a game plan standpoint, from an execution standpoint and from what a defense is going to throw out a young quarterback. OK, so everything you just said makes perfect sense in a rational world, but you got to remember football fans. So if if Baker Mayfield goes like seven for seven on a drive in training camp in preseason, we're all going to be like, oh man, the Browns are back and this is MVP season. That's great.

I mean, that's awesome. That's why we're all fans, right? And I'm speaking as like I'm a fan now, too, because I'm not in the NFL anymore. So I like being ridiculous and over the top and irrational because that's what's fun about being a fan because in regular life, you're not allowed to do that stuff. But when you're a football fan and you're watching a game on TV or you're out there in training camp or in the stadium, that's the type of stuff you can do. You can get away with that stuff.

How excited are you to sit down and watch Red Zone Channel for the first time this year? I'm really excited because, you know, for 11 years, you're watching football in a quiet room, watching Denzone copy or the sideline. And it's kind of boring, but being able to sit there on Sunday and live watch football is going to be awesome. That's going to be the real test of your diet. So when you're not playing on Sundays or you're not burning up like 2,500 calories every afternoon, instead, you're on your couch eating chips.

That's when the pounds start to come on. That's when I'm going to invite you and Big Cat over and we're going to enjoy some chicken wings and we're going to get really fat together on Sundays. Yes, let's do it. All right. So I want to get to the serious stuff about hard knocks. What's the sprinkler system like for the Browns? Because, you know, they always do the slow-mo shots of the sprinklers in the grass.

That's a great question. I guess we'll find out. I've always thought that their sprinkler system was top notch, but it's going to come under the test here of hard knocks. Decent irrigations. Here's the thing, though, with the sprinkler system in Cleveland, like that turns into a flamethrower very quickly. The river's up there very flammable.

Yeah. Yeah, man, you've got to watch out. I think that's how they get rid of players that they don't want anymore instead of cutting them. They just throw them out there and the flamethrower and sprinklers just don't. What about the fact that the helmets aren't going to have any decals on them at all? They took away the stripe. Yeah. That's a big part of hard knocks, too, is slapping the decal on there.

Yeah, man. It's a game changer. I really don't know what you would do if, unless you took the stripe off here in training camps, prove that somebody has earned it. You know, because I can't imagine there's a lot of seasons that go on where a guy rolls out there in the first game and he doesn't have a stripe on his helmet because he didn't earn it. That's very true.

Yeah. We actually heard that there can be a tactical disadvantage to not having a stripe on your helmet because it shows the coaches which direction your head was pointed when you're reviewing film. Is that something you ever looked at? That's actually very true. Not having a stripe on your helmet is really to the player's advantage when they're watching film because the coach really has a hard time deciphering where he's looking

and if his eyes are in the wrong place, you can tell when you have a stripe, but without a stripe, you can get away with murder. I mean, basically you could do whatever you want and the coach has nothing to say about it because he can't tell where you're looking. Yes. All right. Last question about hard knocks prediction. What is the one thing like, did you guys ever have a rookie hazing or people have to sing

their songs or maybe a bowling alley that the whole team goes to? Because that's my favorite part about hard knocks when they're like, these guys training camps tough, but look at the fun side. And then it's just like 90 guys hazing this one rookie as he's completely mortified singing his fight song in front of everyone. Yeah. I think every team does little stuff like that. We've always done the fight song thing, which I always thought by the six or seven year

I was kind of bored with that one. But the one that I love the most that was the most humiliating. It was the hardest for the rookies was when you make them stand up there and they have to tell you what their signing bonus was. And then it's the best because you get the guys that were like undrafted that got like nothing or they got like a thousand bucks and they're really ashamed of it. And then you get like the first round guys like Baker, who's going to go up there and say, you know, got a $40 million contract or something.

They're really embarrassed and ashamed because it's the first time in their life that they've made money playing football that they're allowed to admit to. And everyone, you know, nice, nice, nice. I see what you do there. Or I know they're trying to act like, oh, you know, that's way more money than they've made. So it's kind of a nice fun, humiliating part. But every team's got little things like that to do. All right, I've got one last question for you.

There's always a coach in hard knocks that drops a lot more F bombs than you're prepared to hear that you're not quite ready for. I'm going to handicap them on the Browns. You tell me which one you think is going to drop the most. Number one, I'm going with Greg Williams. I think he's going to drop the most F bombs in the first episode. Number two on my list is Todd Haley. And then number three, I've got Hugh bringing up the rear.

So did I get that right? I would say your first two are accurate. I don't know which order it's going to be in, but Hugh's not a huge F bomb guy. I would say it's probably going to be one of the other assistants like, believe it or not, Bob Wiley, he drops a lot of like subtle F bombs. He's not a big yellow and screamer, but that's just a really big part of his vocabulary. You know, like an Irishman or one of these guys from New York was just dropping F bombs. Just as a part of his normal vernacular, that's I think going to be what number three is going to be.

Because Hugh's not a real big F bomb guy. Yeah, that's like football guy's speech as you just every other word becomes an F bomb over time. Yeah, for an offensive line coach, you actually call that dog cussing. He's dog cussing the guys out there. Yeah. Yeah, it's like instead of saying, you know, or yeah, you just start dropping F bombs. You can say the F bomb, by the way, you're no longer an employee of Roger Godella. So he can't find you if you'd like to go ahead. I'm sure he would like to find me.

So I better watch out. I hear he's like Mossad. Yeah, like secret assassins ready to kill people after they're done with the NFL. Yes, it's absolutely true. All right, Joe, thank you so much. Have you done your like tweet from the lake being like, hey, hope everyone's enjoying training camp yet? Like, have you done that? That's a good reminder.

I'm going to have to throw that out there today. Yes, I'll tag you guys. Please do it. Yeah, do it before the show airs because you eat like that's the big thing when you retire. You got to be like, aha, all these suckers at training camp and I'm just hanging out. Yeah, yeah. And then and then they all tweet back at me their their paychecks for the week. And then they get the last laugh.

That's a good point. All right, Joe, thank you so much. Everyone go download. When does it come back? When's Tomahawk coming back? People want to know, dude, I can't reveal that right now. It's top secret, but it's definitely going to be right around the beginning of the regular football season. OK, so week one is coming back.

Top secret. We just got breaking news week one. Joe's finally going to get back in. You know what you're making your given podcasters a bad name. Guys like us, we grind all summer. Yeah, come on, get back in the booth before you know what people start thinking. Sports bloggers are lazy. Yeah.

Well, you know what? Little guys like you, you got to grind your round to keep your popularity up. But I got like me and Andrew Hawking. We're so big, we can take months and years off and people come right back. Yeah, yeah, you can offer free LeBron jerseys to 400,000 people and then not to live. That kind of stuff, right? That's right. And people just like to be even more after that, even better.

Yeah, that is true. We would we would never hear the end of that if we said something like that. But you, everyone's like, that's Joe, he's awesome. You guys should have played football. It was it's way better out there. Yeah, I did play football in high school. I was a scout team fullback. You may have heard of it.

You should have gotten that paycheck would have been nice. Would have been nice. Put a hat on hat. Yeah. All right, Joe, thanks so much, man. Enjoy the rest of your summer. We'll talk soon. All right.

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Only must be of legal smoking age to enter for details, terms and conditions. Visit vapeburst.com. All right, welcome back to Rick Petino's podcast. We got some segments first up. We got why the process. Why is the prostitute party so bad? And I didn't know about it. But if I did, would it be that bad that a couple of recruits got the dick

sucked? I'll take this one. No, it wouldn't. Yeah. Well, we did. We didn't know about it. But if we did, what's wrong with a couple of dicks got sucked. I'd rather than begin to dick sucked in a building with my name on it. Yeah, then in a building, God knows where on the other side of town.

Right. Like, yeah, they could get robbed or something worse or they could spill the sauce everywhere, wind up with a kid. They don't want to do exactly. Then you got to take her to the subway and tell her that she's getting an abortion in my day. You put a tie on the door. Everybody looks the other way.

It's fine. Yeah, it's a different day and age now, though. Yeah, kids these days, they fucking get you. You buy him a prostitute trying to get him to go to your college. Next thing you know, they're writing books about it. Very sad state of affairs. Sucks. Very sad.

Not my day. All right, we're actually back. Segments. Bachelor talk for guys that don't watch a bachelor. Is this fucking season over yet? It was the finale. Oh, thank God. Becca admitted she was in love with both of the final contestants.

And that's the problem. Blake gave Becca a scrap box of their seven week relationship and still lost. Trent wrote scrap box. I'm assuming it's scrapbook. I love the fact that this dude was making a scrapbook. The entire time, well, cameras were on. And he had to like persuade the producers not to include his scrapbooking in the show. Right.

And then, but then he was like, hey, here's my scrapbook. He was so embarrassed by his scrapbook and didn't want to get revealed. He's like, but here's my scrapbook. And now I'm going home. Yeah. Do you think he carried a Polaroid? I don't know. I have no idea what it's about.

Like trimming some hair off. I don't know how that works. Here's a lock your hair from our first date that you didn't know I cut. Here's a lock your hair from the second date you didn't know I cut off. Here's a little bit of your perfume. I just rubbed it onto this page. Yeah. Good news for him.

The scrapbook now becomes a burn book. Kind of cathartic. Oh, that's kind of nice. Yeah. To wrap it up, Becca picked Garrett and he addressed his problematic Instagram history on the final rows. Like what? Like in Big Booty Picks.

Oh, did he say the N word is a 17 year old, but he was just a kid? I have no idea. He was a rappler. Don't worry, guys. It was just not, you know, just a kid. I've evolved. I can't wait till we get a Twitter controversy where it's like a 28 year old. And they're like, but he's not 30 yet.

Yeah. Like kids are still learning. I really want to know what this Instagram controversy was. Yeah. He probably was sliding into DMs. You know what I'm saying? I mean, if you're on the, if you're on the Bachelorette, you almost, I think you have to start sliding into DMs because just playing the odds,

you're probably not going to win. Right. So you might as well strike well the iron top. Yeah, right. You get that little taste of fame and you got to either start selling. Well, probably both selling those weird diarrhea supplements on Instagram while also sliding into everyone's DMs. Wait, is this the guy that was, that was writing for pro football focus?

Like is his problematic Instagram history? You thought that Russell Wilson was a bad draft pick? Yeah. He, yeah. He, he did a Prisco and was like, I like Christian Ponder over Cam Newton. Yeah. Oh, this is bad. Uh-oh.

He, uh, how bad? It's pretty bad. Okay. Go ahead. Say it, but don't use any slurs. Oh, you thought you just said it. Jesus Christ, but I said, don't use any slurs. He liked posts that made fun of transgender, transgender people.

The old Kurt Schilling. Mocked feminist, uh, claimed Parkland was by Crisis Actors. Uh-huh. Oh, okay. Fuck, yep. All right. So you have Sandy Hook there to hit the, uh, cycle? I don't want to get into it.

Jesus Christ. Okay. This guy is pissed that Alex Jones got taken off Facebook. Let's just say that. Can you, but did he have in his bio likes or not endorsements? Ooh. Yeah, cover yourself legally there. That will cover everything.

So that's loophole. Yep. Retweets are not endorsements either. Rick Petino, if you're still listening, maybe you put that in your bio. He apologized for mindless tapping. Mindless tapping? Oh, it's the Ambien tap.

The Roseanne defense. I actually, you know, there's many ways you can go now because these controversy happen every day, but the mindless tapping or the Ambien liking, I feel like that's a pretty strong way to go. Yeah, he's, he has a nervous tick. Yeah. He's got a shaky thumb.

So you like, yeah, every now and then you accidentally, while you're falling asleep, just type out, Katie could never win with Russ. He was a ball hog. Fuck Oklahoma City. Like that shit just happens, you know? Nothing you could do about it. OK, we have, is that it?

Yep. I thought there was one, I saw a quote on Twitter last night that I really enjoyed. I'm surprised Trenta included, but one of the bachelors was talking to the bachelorette and he goes, you know how guys say that you give me butterflies in my stomach? Well, with you, I feel like I've got eagles flapping around in my stomach.

She didn't like it. She didn't get that checked out, dude. Yeah, that's a filly guy for you. Yeah. That's absolutely like a Sigourney Weaver and alien just fucking eagles popping out of her stomach. I got these eagles in my stomach. Go birds.

Yeah, this is the most romantic thing I could say is that I actually have, you know, heartworms, but it's actually eagles. It's just, I'm going to die soon. We have a take. Oh, no, King's Day Kings for the Sixers. Their first round draft pick, injured. Has a foot injury.

Yeah. Has a Jones fracture. They should just. Zaire. Thoughts and prayers. Zaire. Zaire. Zaire.

Yeah, thoughts and prayers to him. Yeah, Liam knows. It's a very serious injury. They should rename it. I don't know who this Jones guy is. They got it named after him, but he certainly hasn't been as prolific as the 76ers. Right.

They should just call it a 76er fracture. Yeah, the 76ers injury. Take quick. You got to take quick for us? I do, yeah. So I was on the radio with recurring guest, Fred Smoot, today, by the way. FredSmoot.com.

We got to have him back on. He invented, what, Twitter? Yeah, so he invented Twitter trash talk. Yeah. We have to have that guy back on. So we're talking about who's going to win the MVP this year. And he came out with an awesome take. He said that no ugly quarterback has ever won a Super Bowl.

But didn't Nicholls just win a Super Bowl? Well, he's got some things that make. I would say that there are parts of Nicholls that are very weird to fall. I get what you're saying. Maybe John Elway. But he got to grow into his teeth. I don't think Peyton Manning though.

I was going to say, Peyton Manning. Well, you know what? This is like a trick question almost. This is a terrible, yeah, this is a terrible take. No, I think it's a trick question. Because once you win a Super Bowl, you become attractive. The glow up. You're hot as shit.

Yeah, you get the glow up. Yeah, if Snapchat or Instagram can come up with a filter where you've got confetti falling all around you and you're holding a Lombardi Trophy and you're wearing like a triple, triple XL T-shirt that says World Champions on it, it doesn't look much hotter than that. I'm actually thinking about it now.

When was like Brad Johnson was a big, dumb goof? Trent Dillford went bald at like 20. The most big Ben. Big Ben's the most attractive to win. Yes, by far. By far. By far. But yeah, this is, I feel like it's the other way around.

You think so? I don't know. It's something about Trent Dillford. Because even Tom Brady won the majority of his Super Bowls before the glow up. He won three Super Bowls before he had the glow up. I don't know about that. I don't think you can say the time.

Tom Brady didn't need to glow up that bad. No, he didn't need to go up that bad, but he definitely looks a lot different than he did. Like he's gotten hotter with age. I guess Fred Smooch just likes hot quarterbacks. Yeah, yeah, that's true. Or he, yeah, he's just got a very low standard in men. That's really what it comes down to.

Yeah, yeah, come on, Fred. Pick up your standards, bro. Fred, you got a sister? What's, do you have anything else? There's a guys on chicks. I think we're going to do guys on chicks now. Yeah, let's do guys on chicks. By the way, yeah, let's do guys on chicks.

Hey boys, especially Larry, RIP. Tell me the tips I need for moving in with my boyfriend. He said he wants me to be like one of the guys. Okay. So, first of all, your boyfriend's living in La La Land. Get all your pooping done now. Yes, to all the pooping, all the, that time of the month, now, done.

No more periods. Yeah, if you do have to have a period, do it somewhere else. I just came up with a great business idea. It's just like, you can rent a bathroom, like it's an apartment for a month. So, it sounds like she might be living in a house with like her boyfriend and then a couple other dudes. Maybe another guy, yeah.

So, you're definitely going to want your own bathroom. So, I think the biggest thing is, you really don't have to do much different because he will actually change to you a lot more. Think like a barn cat being, or an outdoor cat being brought inside. That's how he is going to be. Not, you know, you live inside.

You know how to operate inside of an apartment. He actually probably doesn't. Right. He'll catch a couple mice and bring them to you in the middle of the night. He'll just like pat them on the head and slowly he'll stop. The only thing I would say is,

just make sure he's got the remote because that always is a tough. The remote, I'd say the remote is probably the most important thing in my life. Here's the remote. Having control of the remote control is something that if I lost all that control, like you remember when you had the moment

where you started getting a little ballsy as a kid and trying to be like, oh, I'm going to do the remote, dad. And your dad was like, fuck no, you are not doing the remote. That's like the first moment you realize, yo, this little fucking thing has all the power in the world. Housewarming gift idea for him? Just buy him a sweet ass remote.

And by sweet ass remote, don't fuck around with too many buttons. A nice simple, get him one of the old people remotes. That's been my dream to have one of the ones that have the giant buttons. That thing, oh my God. So bitching. It's like playing a video game on classic mode.

It's basically got power on, power off, volume and just the numbers. Yeah, get him a keg and a nice remote for old people. That works. I love you. Sup boys, especially PFT. I was giving my boyfriend a blow job the other day and he went soft midway through.

Should I be offended? No, because football season's coming back. So he was probably just thinking about his fantasy roster. That's very true. Yeah, it happens to all of us. We've got other things on our minds right now. Yeah. Maybe, maybe.

Maybe be offended, yeah. Was he drunk? Yeah, we'll go with that. Yeah, he was drunk. So it was whiskey. Yep, it was whiskey. Sup fellas. Or maybe.

Well, it never happened before. So just one time thing. Maybe he just like had a ghost come. You didn't even realize it. There you go. Yeah. Sup fellas, except Big Cat. Oh.

I was at a Cubs game a few weeks ago and saw Big Cat there. Oh. When I went up and said sup to him, he nicely turned around and said, hey, what's up? Why was Big Cat so friendly? And why did he not suck me back? Caroline.

Sorry for being friendly. He said, what's up? And said a sup. I said, hey, what's up? Hey, what's up? He probably turned around. Yeah, so Big Cat came off a little needy there. Yeah.

Like he was trying too hard to impress you. My bad. Hey, my bad. Big Cat, just play cool next time. Yeah, that's on me. Actually, the nicer thing to do is not even talk to girls. I took a picture. This is probably three weeks ago when I was back in Chicago.

I took a picture with a woman and her baby. That was the first one. OK. Yeah, she almost was like, can you hold the baby? I'm not holding the babies. I don't know where those parts go. Yeah, no. Do not give me a baby.

I will drop it. Sup, guys, especially Bubba. Sup. Oh, sure. Sure. Just so happens. So I recently found out the clit is actually an undeveloped penis.

Does that make it gay for a guy to play with my clit? Fellas. Fellas, is it gay to have sex with a vagina? Is that true? I don't have to even know. Yeah. So when you develop inside the uterus, that's why you have nipples.

You don't know what sex you're going to be until later on. So you develop nipples. You start to grow this cool thing between your legs. And if you become a guy, it ends up growing. Hopefully, it grows a little bit more. And if you become a girl, hopefully, it stops growing at some point. Got it.

Yeah. So the balls are the butt cheeks. So women's butts are just nut sacks. Like Kim Kardashian, if she was a dude, she would be Doug Peterson. That's how big her nuts would be. Yeah. OK.

I mean, now all this sounds right. I don't spot the lie. Are you comfortable with this being the sub-bubba? Yeah, I got it figured out. You going to touch her clit dick? I might. Yeah, or if you're Bill Parcells, it's the exact same thing. All right, last one.

Hey, so my boyfriend is obsessed with Drake. He won't stop calling me Kiki and keep asking me if I love him. Oh my god. He even changed my contact info on his phone to it. My real name is Megan. Any advice on what I should do? Yeah, you just got to pretend that you're Cardi B and start calling him Offset and be like,

I'm going to put the brain on you. Or you do a Kiki challenge and get hit by a car. Have you seen those a couple of those videos? Yeah, they're awesome. Yeah, they're so awesome. People are just jumping out and getting hit by a car. Do that, get hit by a car, and then be like, what are you really going to do?

Look what you did. Yeah, look what you did. I was trying to do it for you. And also, every time I hear the word Kiki, I think about how the fact I'm paralyzed now. That's the easiest way out, I'd say. Also, you can just condition him to whenever he thinks of the name Kiki.

Hold up a picture of Kiki Vandaweg, the NBA GM. He's on TV all the time. That is, he's not a looker. Yeah, or Kiki Hernandez, because that's how you say his name, not the other way. Yep, very true. Wait, what's the other way? OK, we are your one stop shop for Tiki torches.

All right, we'll see everyone on Friday. We have Ryan Racilla. He did not cancel. We pushed him back. So we're going to do a full show with Ryan. So we have a Mount Rush, what we're going to do with him that's going to blow everyone's minds. And maybe, maybe we do our first episode

of Rick Petino's podcast with him and see how fast we're still can come. I like it. Love you guys. Walking away, no, I don't know what. I'm to see your fate anyway. Today's another day to find you, shy and away. So I'll be coming for your love, OK?

Thank you.