Pardon My Take - Rob Lowe + Hard Knocks Finale

Episode Date: September 5, 2018

Hard Knocks Finale recap. Cajuste gets cut, the Browns may win the Super Bowl, Hue Jackson didn't like the Khalil Mack trade so it means it's a good one, and Todd Haley hates rap music, obviously (2:25 - 10:16). Hot Seat/Cool Throne (10:16 - 23:16). Actor Rob Lowe joins the show to talk about his career in Hollywood, his favorite roles, playing Drew Peterson, rooting for winners because he's a winner and a self admitted narcissist, and a table reading from Waynes World (23:16 - 79:44). Segments include Done or Finished Rick Pitino, Locker Room Talk Jerry Jones, and Guys on Chicks. You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we have the long-awaited Rob Lowe interview. It was awesome and you need to listen to all of it. Extended cut, we were trying to cut some stuff out and we're like, you know what, we're just going to give it to you. We're going to give you all the Rob Lowe that you can handle. So Rob Lowe is in person, a great interview when we were out in LA. We also have the finale of Hard Knocks, Cleveland Browns, and we have Hot Tea Cool Throne and Guys on Chicks. Before we get to all of that, the Cash App. You know the Cash App. It's the simplest way to instantly send money to friends. It's also the

number one app in finance and now it's the number one app for paying fantasy football league fees. The Cash App is the official award-winning listeners fantasy football fee app. Don't be the schmuck that doesn't pay your fantasy football league fees. So tweet your cash tag and how much money you owe to your league at part of my take and we'll hook you guys up with some free money. You can download the Cash App for free on the App Store or Google Play Market. It is super easy. It is the best app out there. It links directly to your bank account and you can send money to your friends because you're probably going to lose the fantasy football 9 out of 10 to you are. So send your money right now. Don't be that schmuck and use the Cash App. Okay, let's go.

Welcome to part of my take presented by CQ. Today is Wednesday, September 5th and PFT. I don't know if I am just still feeling the high of a Leaveschreiber narrated slo-mo, but I think the Browns are going to win the Super Bowl. Dude, I'm telling you we have gone from trashing the Browns. That's a brotherhood in there. Listen, this is the best season of hard knocks. This is better than the Rex Ryan season. I agree. I smelled it coming into I'm like a dog that can smell football coming entertaining football and that that the combination of some of the guys that we got introduced to like could juice RIP Brogan RIP Brogan's touchdown like the music the spiral and then five minutes later the cut that is what hard knocks is and I

just want to say this right now is a hard part of our job. We don't like doing it, but we're gonna have to let you go today. Yeah, yeah, we're gonna have to let you go. We're gonna put you on waivers. We'll see if anyone claims you, but you're gonna have to I hate that and you know what we're gonna have? We'll have someone take care of you. We'll get you all your stuff. The guys are gonna get you started on the way back. We'll make sure that you have a new trash bag to put all your stuff in. What do you think Brogan Robach had in that cardboard box when he was walking out his bong? Yeah, I mean a couple nudie mags. Probably two footballs. He's like, I don't know if I'll ever see one of these again. Three phones with all those DMs that he's got on there. So hard knocks,

season finale. We went through the cuts. I actually think that we need to you know how ESPN finally did the thing where Schefter couldn't you know tip off the draft picks. We need that for hard knocks because going into this knowing that Kajus got cut, knowing that the late breaking Carl Nassib got cut, like obviously Brogan Robach was gonna get cut. I needed a little more suspense because I was just, it was more just me waiting for the guys that I fell in love with to get cut. It happens every hard knocks, but this year it just felt different. Yeah, they should have softened the blow a little bit. They should have had Moose deliver the news. Just have the dog show up to their house with pink slip. Yeah, and it was also great seeing Kajus. Let me ask you this

question. Do we no longer believe in the power of crystals? No, I believe more in the power of crystals because do you see the way that he handled it? Two reasons. One, he was laughing like a second later. So it gives you a lot of optimism. Number two, his dad survived the cut, which that tells me that crystals work too. Well, actually he didn't because he hasn't had, he's maybe gonna have to have open heart surgery. But he made it through that day. Right. We hope for the best. I hope that his dad gets healthy because that's, that was like, it was such a weird storyline they threw in like, oh yeah, and his dad has really, really serious health issues. And he looks super healthy too. He looks super healthy. His dad looks like an American gladiator.

So I hope Devin Kajus' father does okay with, however, that whole situation figured out. I believe in crystals still. I believe, crystals, yeah. So my power rankings for healing things go one, paint, and then two crystals. Yeah. The other news we had was I've never felt more confident in the Kalil Mac trade than I did when Hugh Jackson saw the news and was like, oh, that's a lot. Yeah. Like, that's too many draft picks. Yeah. That should absolutely make you think that you did the exact correct thing knowing that Hugh Jackson was like, I wouldn't have done that. Yeah, no way. That's a sweet vindication for you. It was so great. And then Hugh Jackson was like, man, that's just like two first runners. That's just what you give up for a great quarterback. Yeah. Like A.J.

McCarran, which he tried to do last year and couldn't do for A.J. McCarran. That's the A.J. out there. It was like the fax machine that fucked up. Yes. The best general manager in the history of the Cleveland Browns is a broken fax machine. Right. Absolutely. Who stopped the A.J. McCarran trade. And then Hugh Jackson finished the night basically saying, here are your stripes, your Cleveland Brown. That means we win football games. A football game? Like a gun rack? Let's start with one. Not many guns necessitated. Let's start with one and then we'll add the plural on later. Yes. How about Antonio Brown? So I have a longstanding theory that the Cleveland Browns are a false flag organization for the

Pittsburgh Steelers. Like their owner that they have, Jimmy Haslam, is a former Steelers owner. I think that they were just kind of, they were brought back into the league to inflate the Steelers record artificially. Big Ben has thrown more touchdowns in Cleveland than Cleveland Brown quarterbacks in like the last 15 years. That's that. That's very true. Big Ben has had more assault charges over his career than the Browns have had wins in the past two years. True. Also true. So there's that. So the question is, we went through the cuts. If you were in that spot, how would you not get cut? It's easy. It's actually a very easy thing. You just don't pick up your phone. Good question by me. You don't pick up your phone. Yeah.

Yeah. So they try to reach you. Oh, my phone's off. They leave a message. Nobody checks messages anymore. You can't be responsible to check a message. It's in 2016. So then you just keep showing up to the facility like Hank did to not get fired. It's like you don't get served. If you just never accept any mail for the rest of your life, you can never get served. I'm sure Todd Haley would hunt you down eventually. That would probably be the best part of his job. That was the other part. They sprinkled in a little Todd Haley, Greg Williams at the end, but Todd Haley also trying to deal with rap music being played at practice. He was not happy. Yep. Not happy whatsoever. And no one has thought a joke was funnier than Todd Haley thinking his

baby Carl joke thing is. He's going to keep doing that all year. Yeah. Every time he sees a baby, he's like, well, you're going to name it Carl. Todd's definitely pissed off that Greg Williams said, I need a fucking Laws and Bitch. And I put my testicles in the C gap. Yes. Like Haley's pissed off that Greg came out of here with two catchphrases and he doesn't have one. Oh, no, he does. Nice, nice job. You fucking kicker. Oh, yeah, you're right. You guys have that one. Good job. You fucking job. You fucking kicker. So all in all, A plus hard knock season, it rejuvenated the hard knocks brand. It was hard knocks making a comeback. So even though the whole theme of it was like the Browns making a comeback, technically mission accomplished. You already rejuvenated an entire

brand. You don't have to win any football games. Yeah. Hard knocks was actually the Cleveland Browns of TV shows over the past two seasons. Yeah. A once storied franchise that had fallen on tough times. And now they're back. Hugh Jackson brought it back. Yes. Leave Shriver. Like honestly, has there ever been a better voiceover guy? I saw you tweet this out about it's weird seeing football coaches wearing jeans. Yes. I don't think it's a football coach is wearing jeans problem. I think it's a Hugh Jackson wearing jeans problem. He strikes me as a guy that should just wear a poncho all the time. He's got that body that just kind of like, like a slimer or a job of the hut that just kind of keeps getting bigger as it goes down.

No, hear me out. I actually think jeans are the weirdest thing a football coach can wear because football coaches, they either in sweatpants or full suit. There is no in between. They're not normal human beings. It's actually the way to tell the difference between normal human beings and football coaches is if you see someone wearing jeans, you're like, that's a civilian. And everything else is like Hugh Jackson kind of trying to blur the lines there. Unless you're in Carolina and it's Friday. True. And it's mandatory. I do think that football guys and football coaches have one pair of jeans. They've got their jeans. Yes. And it's got like a well worn wallet area where the wallet always stays and then a dip can

line in the back. And if it's Todd Haley, it's got some kind of cool pattern on the butt cheek. And you know what I'm talking about? Yeah. He's got Ed Hardy jeans. Yeah. He's got the whole thing going where it's like, these are my maybe a couple of crystals, maybe some rhinestones at the bottom of the boot cup. Yeah. A couple condoms just hanging out of the watch pocket. Just like, yeah. Ready to go. Just letting you know you're a swinger. In some cities, I've heard that if you put a pineapple in your shopping cart, when you're taking it around the supermarket, interesting that on singles night, that means that you swing. Todd Haley just lets everybody on the sidelines know, Hey, I'm DTF. He's just got that condom sitting there. Yeah.

What singles night at the grocery store? Yeah. Yeah. Pineapple. Yeah. Look it up, Hank. Bro. It's also if you leave your garage door open just a little bit. Yeah. Crack it. That means you crack that garage door, come in this garage and cook my wife. Yeah. Just pound my wife out while I watch. All right. Let's get to Hank's never had a good time. Let's get to hot seat, cool throne. Hank, why don't you start? Whoa. Yeah. Hot seat. Hank. I'm not ready for his hot seat. My hot seat is mayonnaise. Okay. The sticky seat. Manage sales have dropped 6.7% over the last five years as millennials abandoned America's perennial favorite condiment in favor of Hipper. Alternatives like Miracle Whip. Yeah. Or avocado spread. Yeah. Here's a trick that you can do if you're opening

a restaurant. This one has the PFT stamp on it. Instead of putting mayo on sandwiches, just put mayo on and call it aioli. That's smart. Yeah. You just make it a little bit, put a little like dash of ketchup in it and then it's secret sauce. Yes. It's gourmet. So you got mayo boys? Big mayo boys. Yeah. I like mayo. Here's the thing. Mayo has been slandered recently. Yeah. It's gone. The pendulum has swung in the opposite direction. I can see a legitimate complaint with over-mayoing sandwiches, but it's gone way too far because there's nothing worse than a dry sandwich. Well, you know what it is. It's like three people online decided that mayo is disgusting and they just make that their entire brand to

bash mayo and I can't keep up with someone who spends 24, 7, 365 online bashing mayo. So that's where we're at. I disagree. I think that there were a few OG mayo bashers, Drew McGarry being one of them. I think he got the mayo train started and then there were a lot of copycats because they saw the engagement. Yeah. Because they're like, oh yeah, this mayo, you know what? If you don't like mayo, you're actually, well, and also you're probably kind of homophobic. Oh, okay. I'm here for that. And a little misogynistic. Why's that? Because you're just like, your masculinity is threatened by having this creamy, delicious spread. I hate white sauce. Just down your throat. Yeah. No, I, you know what? I'm here to say, mayo me up. That's it. It's very great. It's very

courageous. You know what's funny is I've had a draft in the back end of Barstool for the last two weeks in defensive mayonnaise. There we go. And I've been working on it. So can you please quote me in that? Mail me up. Michael Scott, Wayne Gretzky, Dan Kess. All right. In your cool throne? And then my cool throne is Christian Yellich. Yeah. Recurring guest. These are stats from MLB. It's Christian Yellich since appearing on Part of My Take in July. He's first in batting average, tied for first in home runs, first in runs, first in RBIs, and first in slugging percentage. Many people are saying he's going to be that MVP. No, I don't know. Did you hear the stats? Are you denying the Part of My Take bump? No, the Part of My Take bump is real. We made Christian

Yellich. He went from an all star to an all star. And I actually, can I say something? Sure. I got a little triggered because Christian Yellich hit like a walkoff, but it wasn't really a walkoff. It was just Chris Frey just forgetting that you're supposed to probably throw home with bass loaded and one out. And he did the post game interview because I had the stupid Milwaukee feed on my TV and I gave him the finger and sent him a picture of me giving him the finger. And he said, you don't mean that. And I pussied out and I was like, yeah, that's my bat. Hey guys, I know another Christian that improved after a three day rest. Who is Jesus? Oh, nice. Yeah, became untouchable. Yes. Hey, hey, I'm untouchable, bitch. Coming up soon. Okay. Yeah. My hot seat.

Wait, Hank, are you done? Yeah. Okay. The bare minimum from Hank. Oh, I have to say bare minimum as well. What are you doing? It's all amongst us. Wait, what's the segment called? My hot seat. Yeah. My hot seat is can I go? Yeah. Okay. My hot seat is fun. As long as you only have one. My hot seats fun because because no, not fun period. Okay. Fun comma, because the NHL is considering outlawing keg stands on the Stanley Cup, because that is not the Washington capitals have done too many keg stands on it. And they've compromised the structural integrity. And if you look at the laws of physics, never before in the history of the world has a steel structure collapse under its own weight, true just from having Russian stand on top of them and chug

this was bound to happen. Yeah. The some some fucking Oh, actually, you know what? Can we get PFT's Toronto NHL commissioner voice? Remember you did that once? I don't you did do that. Okay, so we're having a little bit too much fun with the cup now. There's a little more Mike Greenberg in it. Listen, okay, so we tried to be fun with you. And we let you have your molsons and just chug it out of there. But when you do it upside down, now that makes that ruins it for the rest of us now. Yeah. And so that guy sitting there in Toronto, and he had that, like epiphany, when he saw Ovechkin doing all this stuff, and he's gonna and Ovechkin ruined it for the rest of us. Well, that's fine. The cups, the caps won the cup better than any other team in the history

of the NHL got harder celebrators. I'm also going to put ad hocule on the hot seat. Oh, another one hot seats because the college ranks are just crawling with jacked up refs these days. I saw like four or five of them, even the ones that are fat, do nothing but arm curls in the off season. Is that ad hocule on the hot seat? Or is it an ad hocule tribute band? It is an ad hocule tribute band, but it's making people forget about the OG ad hocule. Oh, I think I don't know any of their names. Yeah, I think it's actually the opposite. I think people remember one ad hocule because they're like, who was the guy who started it? Oh, yeah, ad hocule and all these refs, they're just itching to do the first down symbol. Yes, to show off those guns. Yeah, why not? Which way to the beach?

Another Yeah, there you go. Another reason why just like games are tilted towards offense is because you have refs that are calling pass interference too frequently. And they just want to do the first down signal. So it's not fair for defenses. Okay, my cool throne is Tom Brady's political future. So this is also a little stay woke on my part. I think that Tom Brady is going to run for office in Massachusetts after he's done playing football. And to win in Massachusetts, when you're running for office, you typically have to be what? Not Kennedy. I was gonna say kill accidentally kill somebody and then cover up. No, that's not it. You typically have to be a Democrat. And Tom Brady has gone from having to make America great again hat in his locker to now he's liking

Colin Kaepernick's Instagram posts. Interesting for the new ad campaign. Even though Tom Brady interesting is an under armor guy, a Nike guy. I've got a big I've got a big theory that I'm working on here. I think he shipped Jimmy Garoppolo out to San Francisco because Jimmy G was a Republican and he didn't like having a Republican teammate. So he's like, I'm going to send you out to hang out with all the Libs out in San Francisco. When you think about it, Jimmy G probably Republican. So he sent him to like conversion camp. Yes, out in San Francisco, either that or just got him out of town. Yeah, because he didn't like he was intolerant of Jimmy G's intolerance because Jimmy G was he do he's he wins all the time. He's like Donald Trump. He's just sick of winning all

the time. He banks porn stars, which is another Trump factor. So my my stay woke on that is that he is he's a liberal and he is trying he's making a pivot to run for office. Just put that one in the tickler file for later. He's got my vote. Okay, all right. All right, my hot seat is going to be our friend, recurring guest, an ultimate football guy, Dave wants that not only is he on the hot seat because he needs his man card revoke, but he also tried Bikram yoga for 10 minutes. He clarified for 10 minutes. But still, Wani doing Bikram yoga, like those that's oil and water. Those do not mix. Let's be real. He he laid down on a mat and complained for 10 minutes. There's no way that this like actually either either happened. Or if it did, like there should

have been some kind of alarm that went off like a siren around the world like hey, Wani just walked into a yoga facility. Is he lost? Is he okay? You know, the life alert. That's how you know that we're living in a computer simulation and it's starting to glitch. Yes, is that Dave wants that is trying to do hot yoga. He must have been so confused. Yeah, he's like, but you know what? Dave wants that does seem like a guy who goes to the sauna a lot. So he's probably like, well, he probably just sat there. He walked in. It was like, why is everyone have their, why do everyone have their clothes on? He walked in with just a towel on. Yeah, he's like, what's what? Why? Why are you guys like, why aren't you guys naked? Well, is this a sport? Yeah. When

do we start hitting each other? Yeah, exactly. So he's on my hot seat. And my cool throne is big baller brand because two reasons. One, I don't know if you saw, but Lee Angelo ball, is it Lee Angelo said that he thinks that maybe the theft in China was the reason why he got passed over in the NBA draft. Great spin zone, buddy. That's the way to do it. It's not the fact that you suck at basketball. Nope. It was probably the fact that you stole something in China that got you not drafted. Right. Well, if you look at the NBA rosters, people who commit crimes do not go on to play in the NBA ever. And then number two reason is Nike stock down, because the Kaepernick stuff, obviously Adidas stock down. I think there was a couple others,

Fila, maybe, I don't know. Yeah. Whatever stock is always all their stocks down. You know what stock's not down? Big baller brand is still privately owned privately owned. That's how you do it. So people are talking this big baller brand is about to have a windfall from this. This is actually a huge opportunity for LeVar ball. Like if he plays his cards right, like we said last week, Nike should start sending uniforms to the troops. Big baller brand should outfit the United States military. That would be great. Big baller brand combat boots. It's six to nine months to get there. And they'd all cost $7,000. I mean, and you don't get the size that you want, but you get a shoe. You get what you get.

Here, a guy who has 10 foot shoes, you're 14, whatever, just take them. Think about that. We're starting a war against China and like they're trying to invade us and we're just like, what are those? We just, what are those? The entire Chinese army. And we're like, guess you guys aren't big ballers. You're not big ballers. And then they have to go home. And we have big baller water. So we actually basically self-sufficient with our troops. If you just go big baller brand for everything. All right. Let's get to our interview. The long awaited Rob Lowe interview. It was a great interview. Really, really fun time. He is literally amazing. And before we do that,

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podcast though, because people are like, I don't know. I think people know what you look like. Yeah, yeah. That's why we're not having you like on a TV show. Right. So we can actually we can just lie and say you're not that attractive. You could it could have gone the other way. I was good in person. Get out of bed. You could be like, dude, do people do people know that you're five three? Fine. This is so sad. This is so sad. I wanted to actually start though. I usually like to, you know, butter up our guests to some easy questions. I want to start with a hard one. Oh, I like it. The most embarrassing moment of your entire career. Oh, my God. Okay. Your entire career. My entire quote, yes, hearing my fave number 18, Peyton Manning will not return to the

NFL 2011 Rob Lowe. All right, let's get it on. Let's do it. Fake news source. Who are you? Who are your sources? First of all, first of all, there's a world in which I'm right. So here, just just bear with me. Oh, go back to the cult bear with me. Okay, at that go back in time, your cults fan, right? The notion that Peyton would never play another snap for you would be unthinkable. Unthinkable. Who is the first person who put that notion out there? That's right. It's me. So you were directing it. Now granted, granted, he didn't retire anyone. Well, with the fucking Super Bowl, you know, I mean, you know, so I was wrong on that account. Yeah. Who are your sources? I like any good. You're a journalist. Yeah. Thank you. You don't,

you don't, you don't reveal your source. It was great though, because people were like, okay, Rob Lowe, Parks and Rec, maybe he does know. Maybe he actually like people ran with it like, oh, man, Rob Lowe, cults insider. Rob Lowe, Parks and Rec, it takes place in Indiana. He must know. Not filmed in Indiana. Not filmed in Indiana, but he must know. Yeah. Know something. Did you get like, I actually did, I actually did get a, I actually did get a phone call. I truly did. Okay. From someone who's like, done deal. He's like, this is way worse than anyone's saying. Interesting. Now, why did they go to you? Because, because I'm a Colts fan. Yeah. Okay. And I'm a huge Peyton fan. Yeah. Did you have permission to break that news? Or was this, you just wrote?

Actually, I went, I learned my first led lesson on Twitter. I was really new to Twitter. And I, I just, I don't think I was really, I'll never forget, because I was, I was, I went through one of the canyons in LA where you don't have reception. So I tweeted it before the canyon, didn't have reception for 12 minutes, got to the other side and had 60,000 more followers. And, and my agents, managers, and everybody were called ringing me off. It was, it was crazy. I was like, what did I do? Adam Schefter is following you now. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Now, once you got a taste for breaking news, even though it was actually not really what ended up happening, did you like want to get back in it? Are you like cultivating sources? Do you want to like

continue to break NFL news? I, I, you know, I think, I think it's rough. It's a rush. I mean, if I had some good stuff, you know, I, I probably, we're gonna start giving you tips. Yeah. Hey, yeah. So anytime I hear something, if I'm not sure about it, I'll run it through you first. And look, and thank God I did. Cause like, had I not done it, then it wouldn't have led to Peyton being on my Comedy Central roast and being so funny about it. It was so funny. Did you get tipped off about the time that Peyton Manning's wife did steroids? We don't know that to be true now. That's okay. That's a lead. Anyone can send boxes. They would say that's a leading question. Yeah. Yeah. Just because we signed for it and brought it inside the house, doesn't mean that she knew

it was not a big deal. That's a leading question. So are you a Peyton Manning fan or are you just a Colts fan? No, I'm a Peyton fan. Yeah. I'm a Peyton fan, which is not to say that I'm not a Colts fan and I'm a big Andrew Luck guy, you know, my son is here with me. He's, he's a Stanford guy. Another great looking guy. Yeah. I hope he does. I was too good looking. Luck? Yeah. Who is he? It's not fair. He, you know, he, and he's not a bad actor. We did a scene in Parks and Recreation was Reggie Wayne, Andrew Luck, me, Chris Pratt. He had Chris Pratt run some, some post patterns. And I'll never forget, Luck just flat footed just with a wrist. It's like a 25 yard seed. Yeah. Well his shoulder doesn't really work anymore. So I would look good the other day.

That's how he did. He did. So, so we're going to get into the acting stuff in your career, but since we're on sports, what are your teams? So Colts, are you, are you the wrong guy now? I've been in LA for so long without a team. What happened was I began to follow other teams. And, and, and here's another thing is maybe you can help me with this. Like people say you, you have to pick a side sometimes. Like I like the Red Sox and I like the Yankees. Okay. That doesn't work. Yeah, that is. Yep. That's ridiculous. But here's, here's, because I like, you know, I like teams that can, that can be rivals. Okay. Like I like the Patriots and I like the Colts. You for the storyline. You're like a journalist. I like the storyline.

And I like, I like teams that are great. You like excellence. I like, I do. Like my brother, Chad, is a longtime Browns fan and Bengals fan. And he like loves it. Like he's proud about it. He's the black sheep. He's the exact opposite. He's the exact opposite of me. Like in that way. Like I like, I like people who are good at what they do. Yeah. He likes people who are bad at what you do. Losers. Right. Okay. So you like Duke basketball, the Dallas Cowboys, New York Yankees, who else? Ronaldo guy, Ronaldo. You root for the sun to come up in the morning. I root for the, I wrote for the inevitable. Yes. Yes. I wrote, yeah, that's exactly what it's like. Have you got a chance to meet LeBron? I have not. I've not met him. He's actually a pretty good actor.

That's what my sons were saying. He's really good in the Judd Apatow movie. I was actually talking about like on the basketball court. Oh, he's a really good actor in the basketball court. We know, can we tell, why does Portnoy hate him so much? Do we really know, because do we really know what that's about? I'm not trying to figure this out. It was a Celtic. It's a Boston Celtic. It's a Celtics cab, Celtics heat thing. And now it's, once you get stuck in a, when you're in the hot take world, once you get stuck in a spot, you got to just, you got to defend it to the end. As I just did with Peyton Manning's retirement. Right. Exactly. Exactly. In spite of all evidence to the contrary, you must double down. Yes. So is it LeBron, is LA LeBron's town? Here's the only

thing I don't like about it. Okay. Here's the only thing I don't like about it. Going on. The Lakers are the Lakers. No one is bigger than the Lakers. The standards, the standards. Yep. I get LeBron, I get it all. He's another player on the Lakers. These are the Lakers. This isn't the Cleveland Cavaliers we're talking about. Right. It's fair. It's the Lakers. So let's get your talk. I like how you said the Lakers. It makes it sound like regal. Yes. Lakers. Like this is purple and gold. Jack Nicholson. Purple is the color of royalty. Yes. True. So it's like, I don't, so the, so the notion that it's like, he's taking it, that's that part I don't like about it. Here's the thing I realized. Watching LeBron do what he does and I sat courtside, the first game of the

championship, he dropped 63. It was insane. Yes. And that's the first time I'd ever seen him and I got was lucky enough to sit courtside and see it. He's a beast. There's no one like him and watching basketball my whole life. And so if you just look at the game and how he plays it, it's, he's amazing. It's the everything around LeBron gets to be tiresome for me. I just get tired of it. I go, I get it. I get it. He's, thank you, please. Can we just stop for a minute? Yeah. So, but that's not his fault. Yeah. No, it's true. It's everybody else's fault. Do you remember, did you go to the Showtime Lakers? Did you go to Lakers? Oh, yeah. I was, I was there for the baby hook in the garden. Oh, wow. You know, I mean, I've been, I was at Gibson's home. I have,

I have like weird sports mojo. That's awesome. I really do. It's weird. Like the forest gump of LA sports. Yeah. No, it's true. All the great times. I was there for Tyson biting the ear off of Vanderbilt. Like weird, I'm like when I'm a weird around weird stuff happens. So, so what was it like watching the Lakers in the 80s, that whole like scene and party? Did you ever get to go to the sauna with Maddie Johnson? No, just Dr. Bus. Okay. Yeah. I liked, I liked the sauna with Dr. Bus. But I mean, it looks, I watch old videos and like this is just insanity. Like the celebrities that show up, the way, the style they played, like the event it was great that something different, the press, not, not the forum club, because that's where the

plebs went, right? Like the press lounge, which you guys in theory would have been able to go to. Yeah. Yes. Right. So you're jealous. What went on the press launch? That's where, well, that was where like, you know, basically Charlie Sheen was the doorman. So you can do the math. That sounds incredible. Was he always crazy? Charlie Sheen, you grew up with him? Yeah. He'd throw about 94. That's crazy. He legitimately throw 94 and it was crazy. That's, I mean, yeah, I mean, I know that he played baseball and obviously he was a very famous baseball role. Yeah, he's legit. Yeah. But those that that era was was great. And also the game was so different. Right. The game was so it's a different game. I mean, listen, I love, I love

LeBron, but he but he we used to call carries carry carries on every possession. Yep. Every possession. Yep. And he's actually never scored a point. And everything's okay. Under the 1980 rules. Allen Iverson ruined basketball for everybody when he started palming the ball. Yeah. So he palms and and also with with the he's got that hand out. Yeah. Yeah. So he's allowed to hand check. But that you think that's right. Yeah. So it's Jordan is the goat. Is that what I'm hearing from you? Listen, I'm just saying the game. Look, he's playing by the rules. Those are the rules and he's the best that's ever ever played. So I don't want to be like like I'm in a LeBron because I'm not but as a longtime basketball fan and then somebody who's got busy

with other sports for a while and came back to it when I sat, like I said, right there and watch it, the game is 1 billion percent. It is. It is. So we have to ask you this as a Lakers fan who are your top four Lakers of all time. We personally don't care. But you have to ask it. It's like legal when you have somebody. So you don't like the Lakers? Is that what? No, I'm just saying it's a big LA discussion. Yeah, it is. Well, taught. Oh, listen, I'm always a magic guy, always going to be a magic guy. He was just my part of it. I think is the era that you are young and you're the same age as the players. I think you're always just going to connect to them better. So magic, 1 billion percent. And then I think I mean, it's so hard. I didn't see

Wilt or Jerry West play, right? He got thrown on there just as a logo. They're up there. But then what do you do? Who's like who would guard Shaq today? No one. Who would guard? Who would guard him? Yeah. What we were just talking about. I think that the Kobe Shaq 3P team would destroy Steph Curry's team. Interesting. That's a hot take. That is a hot take. Who would guard Shaq? Who would guard Steph or Kevin Durant? Or Clay. Yeah. When you got all three of them on the court, change the math. You know what you do, though? It's like you go look, if they're going to bomb from outside and beat you, they will beat you. And that's it. But they're not coming inside. So just let them do it. Live and die by the three. Let them live and die by the three. So my top

four Lakers all time. Which, by the way, in those, that's the thing that I got to spend some time with Steve Kerr. And I was like, dude, you and I are the same generation. A guy inbounds the ball in a pivotal moment and dribbles five feet from the half court line and heaves it up. You'd be on the bench. Right. And he's making it at like 45 percent. You'd be on the bench. You don't know. In our day, you would immediately be sat on the bench and you might not touch the ball for us. He was known as like the greatest shooter or one of the best shooters in that era. And even he wouldn't do it. Yeah. He couldn't touch the court. My top four are Shaq, Nick Van Axel, Steve Nash, and LeBron. Oh, I was going to say Steve. Gary Payton? Gary Payton at home alone

maybe too. If you're going with that list, you got to put Dwight Howard at number one. Yeah, Dwight Howard. Because we're missing out big time. It's Robert Orrie. Number one. Yeah. Count the rings. Yeah. I'm all about the rings in the argument. Big shot, Bob. Yeah. He's never missed a shot in the fourth. Yeah. Robert Orrie is he was on we look at the players we've had. I mean, it's Lamar Odom. The league goes on decent, whatever. Actually, Lamar Odom, he gets a bum rap. He was actually pretty good. No, he was. Absolutely. Lamar Odom when he was good was a guy who will give you 20 more wins than you would otherwise have during the season and nothing in the off season. Yeah, he would kind of disappear every time.

And you know, he's famous for apparently eating sugar a lot. This is the, did you know this like thing? Yeah. Yeah. Like that. I just love that they bring him a bag of sugar in like like sweet tarts and I don't know what all he would just go wild. You strike me as a guy who doesn't need any sugar. Is that I woke up in the middle of the night last night and pounded some hog and does you're confusing him with. Okay. This is even worse. Yeah. So all right. So let's so let's do some acting talk. All right. So you're an actor. Good question. They say should do us do a bit. Make me believe that you're not you. I've been Dav and I've been doing a good job of making you believe that I'm interested. Yes, exactly. You've done a great job. No, seriously, though. So you

you've been in Hollywood for what 30 years, 40, 40 years. So you started I'm always interested at guys like you have such a long career and like you basically shot out of a cannon when you're such a young age. How much of a mind fuck is that when you have that type of celebrity and fame at such a young age basically overnight? When you're going through it, you don't know anything different. So that's it's only with some time and perspective that you look back on it and go what what what the fuck just happened to me. And you know, I have two sons and and they are now older than I was when I was at a stage in my life where I was like running through airports, hiding from people wanted to rip my clothes off. And that's such a weird thing like that's not

many people are ever going to experience that right and and looking at it through the prism of my own kids, I know what it would do to their heads. Like and so I then I can figure out what it did to me. Right. You never come out of it. There's no way you come out of it with a a normal perspective of life. It's impossible. Yeah. Was there a moment where you're like, okay, I'm not normal guy anymore, like it's over. I can never turn back to just be regular Rob Lowe. No, you never think that way because it's you don't know anything differently. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it's like so that never enters your mind and it seems normal to you. Like that's your your everyone's reality is going to seem normal to them. While you're going through that

that kind of first stage of just having like the immediate success in Hollywood, were you would you stop and just be like, this is fucking awesome the whole time? Or were you just like riding the wave? I want to know I was always like, this is great. But what's next? I was like, I've always been really driven and I was driven then and and to this day, I mean, I'm I'm I have enough perspective and of gratitude to get what what I've been able to do and and all of that and I don't begrudge it and I feel I celebrate it. But but I it's very much about thinking about, okay, that's great. But now what? Yeah, is your face insured in Lloyds of London? Is it really? Yeah. Do people do Lloyds of London is that like an old fashioned? That's very that's

that's a very Rick Riley reference. Yeah, you would say. Oh, no, no, no. I know enough. I know enough about you guys to know that that is not a compliment. No, it's not. Well, no, it's not. He's stuck in the year 1992, kind of. But like, is it has your face ever been insured by Geico? No, it's a better joke. Yeah, that's good. Like the Sean Watson's knee was insured when he was a senior at Clemson or junior at Clemson. I mean, no, they they I myself, as in my totality, because you know, I'm more than just a face, right? Right. So I, I my my my great hair, too. Yeah, there's new hair. This is the summer haircut as of yesterday. That's your quote. I read a quote that you're a benevolent narcissist. Yes. Yeah. That's a sheet of

Jones. Yeah, I had never heard the term and I love it. Do you think that describes you one billion percent? Yeah, I read a quote from you. You said that there's a bias against good looking people in Hollywood. I agree. Yeah, as a there isn't that. I bet you that's a dated quote. And I bet you it's it's a little out of context. So here's what it is there. There there there's there's a bias against everybody. Everybody is a bias, right? So so by default, there's a good a bias against good looking people and look at look at like Harry Grant never won an Oscar. Paul Newman. That'd be 80 before he won one. Redford's never won one for acting. So and it's the same thing with comedy. I think there just there there is there's a sort of sense

that you can't you can have depth and substance and also do you think I feel like that's kind of like getting typecast. Do you think you've ever been typecast? And is I mean, I did. I mean, I might have felt that way earlier. I don't now. In fact, that's one of the great joys is, you know, I can do play like a maniac on Californication, like Eddie Nero, and then at the same time be playing Chris Trigger, and the same time be playing JFK, and then be playing like Drew Peterson. So we're going to get to that because that's my favorite movie that you've ever done. Did you like you saw it? Did you see it? I like it's fun. It's fun. 100 times. I'm untouchable, bitch. I love it. Yeah. No, that's you want to talk about

you want to talk about that? Because I mean, that's look that move that part is like when they offered it to me, I go, there's how do I play the script and you're like, so so the kid walks in sees me having sex and says, no, let him watch. So they know why they call me big daddy. I was like, this is insane. I was like, I'm so there for that. I'm like, you fucking kidding me. I'm so doing that. Wait, I'm going to be in a prosthetic nose, eyes, ears. You played it well. You played it very well. And maybe I had the best time ever doing it because you captured that like, okay, it's Rob Lowe, but he's kind of creepy here, which I mean, Drew Peterson, bad guy. Yeah, pretty well known bad guy. And you you captured that like this guy just makes you uncomfortable

being around him. Yeah, thank you. I love playing that part. And that's like, there's no way anybody asks me to play that part earlier in my career. And that they would think of me to do it was was was awesome. And I took it not knowing and not having any idea how I would ever do it. I watched tons and tons and tons and tons of tape. And he was always like showing up on like Shepherd Smith. Oh, yeah, because he loved I mean, he was a murderer who loved the camera. Yeah. And he had a great voice and really weird. I rewrote the script and took all his actual things he actually did say because they were more insane. Yep, and what they wrote. Yep. And I was how many takes did you take for the I'm untouchable bitch scene? Well, that's one where even I went, is this too much?

Have we gone too far? No, it was and they're like, No, just enough. Just I saw it for the first time about five I just showed you sat down. Goosebumps. Yeah. That that that door that garage door going up and down, right? That was it was beautiful cinematography. Yeah. Yeah, we had we had the cinematographer did did did the the abyss and background. Okay, so am I the first person to say that was your my favorite role you played? Yes, you actually are the first perfect. Yes. And I'm happy about that. I've had seriously seen that movie many, many times. I'm very proud of it. I'm I wish by the way, it was a huge it was a huge hit. So yeah, it was fun as people have seen it. Yes, but people don't people go Sam Seaborne the West Wing, they go whatever they do.

Peterson, I'm untouchable, bitch. I love it. I'm a little bit more of a basic bitch. I was a big fan of Chris Trager. Thank you, Rick. I've fallen asleep watching that on Netflix many, many times so your lines have subconsciously seeped into a good good. That's a good one. When you when you first showed up, I guess it was at season two. Yeah, right at the end of season two. Were there any plans at all for you to stick around as long as you did? So the very quick readers digest because it's kind of interesting was they were thinking about my agents wanted me to join 30 Rock and they thought that I would be a good nemesis for Alec Baldwin, and which would be genius. Yes. And so there was discussions at NBC about it. And then be so like,

interesting. Yeah. I'll tell you what, we have another idea. Would he ever think about joining Parks and Recreation? And we're like, huh, I hadn't seen the show at that point. I knew of it. My kids liked it. John Owen loved it. And that's how the whole thing started. And I met with Mike Scherr who created the show and runs it. Actually, one of the original blog boys. Yeah, sure. Yeah, of course. What is it? Joe, fire Joe Morgan. Yeah. Have you ever read that to me as a big red machine guy? Yeah. Yeah. As a big red machine guy, Joe Morgan is on Mount Rushmore. But he also doesn't know what numbers are. So that's what I've done. Mike and I had many conversations about this. Yeah. He was never ever able to articulate to me in a way that I can understand what the fuck the

problem was with Joe Morgan. Joe Morgan just doesn't believe that numbers have any place inside a sport at all. Very old. This is really old. So he actually would say things like I think we talked about this the other week, like David Eckstein, you might almost want a guy like that on your team over a rod, right, right, like the best baseball player of all time. Okay, so like that Joe Morgan would go down that route and then Michael Scherr started blogging about it with some other writers. It was actually like a great website. I don't know if you know, it was great. It was really hilarious stuff. Joe Morgan would be like the best player in major league baseball as whoever has the most RBIs that kind of stuff. Yes, guys. It's like, well, everyone in front of them gets on

base all the time. But that's how much in the weeds here with home runs or rally killers. Yes, because it's hilarious. That's great. Yeah, that's taken to the end of the home runs or rally. Yes. So you have this conversation about joining Parks and Rec and what was like when they wrote this role for you, like this is and they did they wrote it for me. Yeah. And I think they were already going to bring out Adam Scott on and then they decided to team us up and and Chris Traeger kind of morphed. He was he was originally the smiley happy guy in the room who walked out of the room and had everybody murdered. Like he was like that guy. And if you look at the first time he shows up on the show, he is that guy. And then it quickly morphed into him being who he

became who was just the most positive man in the universe who loves bureaucracy who just loves everything. Yes. Yeah. Right. So I love I love playing the character and it was going to be six episodes and then we were going to reassess and see if I was happy and if they were happy. And I remember we were doing an episode called the flu season where Chris gets the flu. It's a sort of a you were in shock that your body betrayed you. That's right. And I look in the mirror and say stop pooping. And that was an ad lib that I came up with on the spot. And I think that was the moment that we all were like, All right, this is going to work. So did you know when you're doing a show like that or maybe even a movie, do you know right away like this is going

to be great or sometimes sometimes sometimes and then sometimes what's a case where you maybe did a show or a movie and it wasn't didn't feel great. But then afterwards everyone's like this was unbelievable. Yeah, no, that's I mean, that's happened. I mean, look, acting. When your actors talk and I like I love my fellow actors, but sometimes listening to actors talk, I want to jump off of a building and and the sort of this sense that it's that it's something other than a job, right? Like, like, architects don't get to they don't go, I'm not going to I will not build an A frame, I simply won't do it. It's like that's what they build houses, what they do. Right. So I play parts, I do things. That's what I do. Not all of them are necessarily my taste.

Right. And I think to think otherwise is just self aggrandizing BS. Right. Everything that you've done has been like exactly what Roblo wanted. No, it's just not the way it works. I mean, you try to but and and I've been lucky enough that a lot of it is but I'll be like there are times where I'm like on brothers and sisters and I'm doing a scene with Sally Field, she's making a brisket. And I'm like, we're in oven mitts. I'm like, you know, paycheck. No, I'm not feeling I'm not feeling that is that a conscious decision because I know all my knowledge of Hollywood I learned from entourage. So you have to do like the blockbuster movies to do the passion projects. Would you actually have that out like,

okay, this year, I have to do something to get my name out there cash and big paycheck, then I can go do the passion project. I think it's not quite as you're telling me it's not entourage isn't real. It's not what you're saying. By the way, now everybody it's become real because every agent right right grew up going I want to be like Ari gold every agent is like everybody it's become real. Yeah. I mean, I think what I always do is I find I try to find something that that I that has a resonance to me in in in a it always and I've been I have enough opportunity that I can do that I've never had to just suck it up and just do something that I didn't like doing. But there's always going to be things that speak to you more than others always.

Right. Everything I learned about Hollywood comes from Charlie Kaufman and adaptation. Oh, is there anything that you've like had a like a real passion about doing that's gotten stuck and has never actually come to fruition like what's one one project I've been trying to get this amazing Civil War mini series where I play Ulysses Grant off of the ground because I love I love a Gettysburg that movie is amazing and a big and just the brother against brother country split apart you know it's it's so rich and it's such a part of I love it and I just cannot it's a great script and you know just keeps every year it almost gets made and it almost gets made and it almost gets made you know what the issue is so as Americans we become too desensitized to

having machine guns in our war movies so when you have the guns that fire like once every 45 seconds it's boring it's like and so here's what you do I also think I also think the problem is Beards yeah a lot of lot of Beards yeah Beards are out a lot of Beards you think well actually Beards are I'm in there okay I'm in this room and there's one two three four and a half yeah there's four and a half and then Jono is trying to go out that's a lot of Beards in the room you think that's a nice now it's time for the to revisit the Civil War that's true I just have my beard because I'm thank you for considering me to have a beard yeah that's actually made my life it's 100 percent a beard this quality really want to take that back so here's what you do to get a pitch

that's the worst thing he said on this get it get it made get it made by just pitching it as a Civil War movie except with machine guns just like one minor alteration we could do that or do the movie of your grandfather great grandfather we were reading that we read your computer oh that's amazing yeah so tell that so my family has no lore about it there's no like well you know you're a great grandfather there's never a story like I can't get anything out of people in my like nobody knows anything about our family history nothing so I did this show called who do you think you are where they they put genealogists on you for two and a half years and they research everything and if they find something great they take you on a journey to find out but you don't know where

you're going they just say pack warm clothes or pack cold clothes and you have eight days so I found through doing this that my five-time great grandfather was an 18 year old conscripted into the Hessian army to fight for England in the Revolutionary War in America he arrived in New York Harbor in 1776 and fought George Washington in the battle of New York the battle of the Palisades and was in the camp in Trenton when Washington crossed the Delaware holy shit and surprised them on Christmas Eve now my house is modeled after Mount Vernon I have a portrait of George Washington in my living room I didn't know any of this wow that's crazy yeah and and then my my five times great grandfather was taken prisoner by the the Americans and then renounced his citizenship

became an American citizen and then began to fight for the revolution so he was like the Kevin Durant of soldiers he was a frontrunner too just like you frontrunner that's where we get it yeah I never put that together thank you yes he loved excellence I've gotten more out of this than any psychiatry yeah that I've had in 30 years welcome by all winning side yeah he likes winners that's it it's in your blood doesn't like nothing you can do it's nature versus nurture you were born this way eugenics is that yeah sure yeah that's smart eugenics eugenics that's kind of a different thing yeah that goes to a dark place um let's talk about some of your other rules actually from your perspective we we do a lot of uh FMKs on the show you ever play FMK just guy talk yeah fuck Mary kill

if you were to fuck Mary kill three of the characters that you've played who would they be oh jeez oh god um of my of my yeah so at some point I'm killing myself and having sex with myself yeah yeah it's pretty electric yeah just a tip I would not marry Drew Peterson because you know end up dead no because it would kill you yeah I'd I too for pick I would I would I would I would kill Drew Peterson okay good good call because he would kill me yes correct um I would I think I'd like to have I think I'd like to have sex with um my character from St. Elmo's fire okay because I look a little bit like a woman in it anyway and and and and you're a narcissist so it really doesn't matter but little on the young side and the hair the hair is really good yes I could kind

of imagine you know I could close my eyes and it could be a girl yeah okay I get that a lot and then Mary favorite role ever um Mary I I want to go Sam Seabourn on the west wing okay okay that's good easy good safe I kind of have a bone to pick with you about the west wing though so it was a great character great show but you kind of convinced a generation of nerds that got into politics that compromise would be the way to solve everything and it turns out that everybody just doesn't compromise and they'll hate each it was like a very idealistic show right totally which made it great but then people try to like take what they saw in the west wing and put into practice in real politics and it doesn't work like that all the time no it doesn't it totally doesn't

it's what's like it's like anything else is like a the movie version it never really works out in the real world right right I mean it's like but I I will it's what's really been great is is um there are people today in the government that are only there because of the west wing I last time I was at the White House was um during Obama's tenure and I came in on the weekend and every single member of the speech writing team came in on their time off to say hello and his then speech writer was like I Sam Seaborn was my idol I became a speech writer because of Sam's awesome and you go wow that's it affected like it affected you know someone's life in that way is amazing to be and you said that actors don't have a higher power come on we need to look I just I just don't

like the the self seriousness but you know listen listen but that's saying I'm inspired by people people are inspired by people I'm inspired by actors I'm inspired by great work by movies by athletes no we that we do have that power to inspire people it's true all right who is the bigger dickhead your role in Tommy boy or in Wayne's world hate it both boy they're both make me laugh so hard um I think the bigger dickhead is is is the Tommy boy yeah that is really fucked up yeah he was he was yeah he was he was like David Spade calls him Lee Harvey Oswald right because of the haircut yes I mean he was bad he was a bad mofo would you who do you get recognized more Tommy boy Tommy boy 100% yeah Tommy Tommy boy is a big thing yeah it's a big like I'm I'm surprised

at the amount of staying power that move oh absolutely I mean just Trey Wingo talks about it like every single thing yeah people love it yeah yeah no but yeah I mean we're both 33 like that was probably I probably was like the first funny movie I ever watched really oh my god that's really really fun it's a great it really holds up it's a good one you remember when your balls got hit over and over again going through that like conveyor line at all yeah totally yeah classic guy yeah um counterpoint to that your character in Wayne's world had some pretty hateable pants really big like we had a big we had a big order of issue on that show like I'm Lorne Michaels who's a genius was very didn't like my wardrobe early on I was in I was in suits originally

and then he didn't like the suits and I was more in like sport wear but there's the pleats there's a lot of pleats I mean there's really I mean that is the height of what was 1991 yeah early 90s yeah early 90s I mean woof woof woof yeah that guy Benjamin Crane real big dickhead dick yeah great dick yeah yeah yeah and it stole the girlfriend yeah I mean that's kind of a theme for you here's what I realize is that I used to think that people didn't that they could separate no they don't what I know is they I now realize is like I used to think you were such a dick I'm like why yeah like well because of Wayne's world like really I think Chris Traeger has kind of taken that away though yes sure wash that a little bit yes so I I'm I'm I'm not in I'm no longer playing the comedy

dick right right I did it it was great it was really fun I was good at it but it's like it's it's run its course you know party that wants to get back to that I'd still play a great dick yeah if you have a little bit of dick in you yeah every you gotta have you if you don't have any edge you're just a Canadian yes that's a great quote that's a great quote put that on yes yes we won't give you any cut of that should I dye my hair no you dye your hair no yeah you do no I thought I read a quote that said you dye your hair if I well if I'm playing a part I'll dye it for the part but like in my real life now I don't dye your hair but it was online it said that you dyed your hair you should probably get that fixed no no no no no online it says here's what's

interesting when I played Drew Peterson he has gray hair right so I didn't want to wear a wig so I had them dye my hair gray which by the way I don't ever recommend dyeing your hair gray that's I don't shouldn't dye your hair definitely don't dye your hair gray right it takes it took me nine hours to get my hair gray and before I played the part I had to do this big press event and so there are all these photos of me on a press line with gray real gray hair and people think it's real that's where that all came from people was like oh my god he stopped dyeing his hair so you never dye your hair no you know I think I should you see this looks dude it looks great that's a lie you're no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no here's the thing about that though

when your hair starts going gray the only thing is you have to keep it short okay yeah that's that's the only thing do the poly walnuts wing tips you cannot have long gray hair that is a that's a no flies on that's a good point that's a very good point um who was the best athlete in the brat pack oh athlete ooh well question if you if you if you consider charlie in the brat pack well I mean I'm sure you had a great card then then it would be charlie yeah hard way through the through the roof jud jud nelson was the greatest best basketball player and he always played with his shoes untied I don't know at what point was the brat pack like okay we're gonna all go our separate ways was it weird was it awkward no no there's never there's never we didn't have a

breakup or something well it's like the beatles well it's so funny thinking about like the brat pack right there's no yoko ono well because now where's the vini chase of the brat pack to give us in terms we can understand everything has to be an option yeah if the brat pack exists now it would be a text chain where everyone texts and then you've been on one of those where you just kind of someone just stops texting and then all of a sudden it just dies yeah 100 now but for the brat pack you had to do that in person yes so we're one of you like I'm not talking to you anymore we just got busy got it we got busy and then and then I also think I mean also then you get some people get married you get married you know I mean you actually said that I read that quote

that I found interesting where you said like with friends and in life you give them a chance to evolve with you and if they don't it's just they kind of fall behind it's hard I mean and I'm not in any way insinuating that I evolved to some higher level but you get you you have different priorities you know it's very hard like when you're married you're drawn to other people who are married going through what you're going through if you have kids you're drawn to people who are having kids you know if you're single I don't want to hang around a bunch of people with screaming brats around you know I mean so it's like there there's there's that element of it I think have you ever thought about joining Scientology I shot in the Scientology Center once and they

had the Dianetics book and I had so I had a lot of time on my hands and I read do you know guys what the tone scale is did the tone scale is my favorite part about Scientology is that when they like inject you and then read your fate levels no the tone the tone scale is is I was obsessed with learning about it because I had this time on my hands I'm interested I'm not right now I'm so anticipating the story that I'm basically halfway inside you sell us on science and the great irony is I'm not a Scientologist nor do I want to be no wink and the end of it it wink of course I'm playing footsie with you yeah um so the tone scales I'm I'm supposed to figure out what tone you're coming at me on like with zero being you're dead you're not you're

nothing to say Jim Caldwell to like to like a hundred where you're screaming at me and I'm Jim Harbaugh Tom Sewell yeah yeah it's the gym scale you gotta talk to us in football and I'm so I'm supposed to find that tone scale and then come at you either one or two below or above that tone scale so there's always a mathematical equation when you talk to anybody it's it's it was that's something so it's like you're mad it's almost it's just like personality matching basically it's really odd so no I'm not I'm not a I'm not a the other thing I've always wondered is is like you know when you they have you come in and you're supposed to grab the cans and they have cans that you touch I guess and make sure this is Scientology this is 100 no this is 100 Scientology and then

they ask you questions about your life and then based on the the emeter they know whether you're have tension around it and you have a good relationship with your mother and then they read but then the theory is your deepest darkest secret so we can hold you thank you hostage for the rest of your life right and I want to know how do they get to the deepest darkest secrets they like how does that like actually go down so like you know when they have the goods on you yeah it's like have you ever lied yes have you ever had a parking ticket yes have you ever had sex with a man you regret it yes I mean why I don't know I don't know and then you just start going right I like how do they get the goods on you right yeah I want to be the guy that that puts

that question in they have the best interrogators imagine how successful you could have been if you had become a Scientologist you could have actually had a good acting career yeah it could have been amazing yeah I'd be even better looking um what's in your riding like John Travolta my rider yeah I'm a firm believer in riders yep there are things we earn mm-hmm and you work hard to get them yep when you're a young punk yep coming up you should be you know in the small dressing room and sweating your fucking ass off mm-hmm do you let the big dog come in you know it's like it's like in the NBA yeah rookies carry the bags yes I'm a big believer in protocol and all that so what's the weirdest thing in your rider the weirdest thing uh here my stuff is is is really it's

really straightforward it's um it's just I'm trying to think what is it it's um oh I mean satellite TV okay in my that's a monster I mean I gotta watch my sports yeah I'm just saying that because of those commercials where it was like I am Rob Lowe and I'm nice they didn't even give me free direct TV really wow they paid me online yeah so you could have bought it but no yeah I guess that was their thing yes yeah like we're paying you it's a whole thing though you gotta call them and yeah yeah installed any kind of weird candy or anything uh no um I used to have like you know gum and stuff like that but I'm as healthy as hell now so it's all just but I don't have any I don't have any weird stuff that's all the music business yeah you know I'm not happy you know I'm not watching

my hair and Evian or anything I see how I wish like I just want to get to a point where I have a rider at some point and just put this random shit here's what I want to get to I want to get to a point where I have a studio pay for me to be juiced up with the top doctors with all kinds of performance enhancing yep I want that have you ever taken a I legitimately I want them to go hey guess what I don't necessarily want to do a Marvel movie to do a Marvel movie I want to do a Marvel movie so I have it so somebody gets me ripped yeah puts me on drugs that I don't that I would never do in my real life right but I have an excuse to right it's for a role yes it's for a role right you've never taken a pee yeah I want to I want that Hugh Jackman Wolverine coming out of the

fucking yes fuzzy shot body absolutely look at Sly Sly's what like 65 seven years old yeah like that he looks like 35 he knows his stuff yeah he's doing it oh yeah well the best was and I've known him forever and he's the great he's the greatest and he was like I'm recently very obsessed with my forearms I was like what and he's like well when you think about it all you have to do is you roll your shirt up and everybody sees it so smart no he's no one is better at like telling you what the the the term is show muscles right like so and his thing is it's biceps and abs but recently he's added whoops cutting corners yeah right there that's good I like that a lot I get a lot of form of workout in yeah um you almost dated Madonna what does that try to what does

that mean so we both almost dated Madonna how did you I mean I mean I feel like we I got just as okay now yeah I don't think so I do not think so what does that mean though you almost dated Madonna I tried my hardest and this is when this is like material girl time this is like you know biggest star in the world biggest star in the world minks um and you know I was sending her I think I might I think I might even send her flowers and you know it was it was one of those things where it was like you know like when it's on it's on yeah it was it was but she was on tour and I was doing this and then we finally met in New York and then you know then she got busy and I lost her one night at a club and couldn't find her and you know and then just never happened

damn that's I mean Jose Canseco has the same story yeah actually he said that she wanted to date him and that he just he kicked her to the curb because she wasn't attractive enough for him really yeah but Jose Canseco we know he he tells the truth yeah he confirmed truth teller Jose Canseco all I know about Jose Canseco's I saw him at a home run in a world series game in Dodger Steve that dented a camera and center field I believe it I believe it I believe it um all right so what about the what about the fake saxophone story I want to hear about that just that I'm what what happened so usually I do a one-man show and everybody's listening to this podcast check and make sure I'm not coming to your town to do my one man yeah yeah do my one

man show what's your next one what's coming up I will get you the dates and we'll put them in but um uh and I I do a big like 15 minute set piece on my fake saxophone playing perfect do it right now 15 minutes well I mean we'll leave the room I don't really do 15 minutes but um so I you know I fake play it and see an almost I don't really play the saxophone I don't do anything for real I fake do everything I fake fight I fake hockey fake hockey and young blood I fake government and the West Wing I can fake do so many things great like that's what I do so um we're doing a political fundraiser for for then president Clinton and David Foster who wrote Sonoma's fire says why don't you come up and fake play the saxophone it's going to be great it'll

be people laugh it'll be really fun I go that'll be great that'll be great so we start playing it the sax I come up and I'm literally there's a guy behind a curtain playing it and I'm faking it and I look out in the audience and they're buying it hook line and sinker now my my actor's ego is getting involved like I'm really like I'm fucking crushing this yeah I'm killing this and I'm like wait a minute now what do I do and I so I don't have the guts to bail on the bit like I thought I'd eventually just stop playing and like drink water while they were even laugh but now they think I'm doing it so I'm like fuck it I'm doing it and I look and like president Clinton's like like giving me the thumbs up and in the front row is Quincy Jones now he's am I thinking Quincy

you're close enough to feel there's no air coming out right like the horn bells right there's nothing come on you're Quincy Jones right and he's like brother I didn't know you could play and so and now I get back to my seat now my wife is furious with me she's like that was terrible you that you can't like foist that on these people so we we bail when I forget I try to pretend like it never happened I get a letter from president Clinton like two weeks later going I had no idea you were such a great saxophone player and we're gonna do a duet when you come to Washington and I was like oh my fucking god you picked the one president who played the saxophone who plays the fucking saxophone so then I went into a shame spiral about you know like by pulling one over on

the president of the United States so and then I called David Foster and I'm like look this is not good I don't know I'm gonna see him again and then I'm gonna say what it was a joke and then he's gonna feel like a fool that's not good he's on and all I don't worry I took care of it he knows you weren't playing so what what do you mean he goes I'm in the studio with Barbara Streisand right now and Barbara's great friends with the president and I told Barbara and Barbara told him and I'm like okay only I end up in a compromising position with Barbara Streisand Bill Clinton over fake playing the saxophone I didn't know he had lips like that Rob I'm bringing you to the White House making you wrap those lips around that's fantastic um would you ever consider playing James Bond

I'd love to play James Bond you're making a good one you're just like kidding me can you do any British accent bold James Bond that's good all right I could I could do it look and do drew look if I can do Drew Petersen's accent and JFK yep I can do a rudimentary posh English I I don't think they would ever it's just as interesting as they I don't think they would ever cast an American yeah but it would be good buzz it would be good buzz listen if you guys can if you know anybody we get some strings yeah we have some friends you know I'll have either salva killed yeah yeah I mean throw my name I love Lloyd Ari Golds assistant he can get it for you you can do it I know him yeah he's kind of incompetent though yeah right exactly I probably

have to go straight to Ari what's it like always uh knowing like whenever you put on a suit you're gonna look awesome that's why I should play Bond yeah yeah but seriously that's why I thought of it like what's that like as someone who's never put on a suit and looked good I would love to know like what it feels like to we have to know the secrets I look great it's all about tailoring yep it's all guys always fuck up the tailoring they get the suit and they think I like the color I like that it's it's all all the tail you know when James Bond wears a suit that same suit to the movie there's 21 different versions of it mm-hmm there's the one that's tailored for when his hands are up on a motorcycle literally it's tailored it's tailored for that for the hands to be up

there's one tailored for him running there's one tailored for he has the vest under it there's what so it's all movie magic it's all about tailoring huh interesting most guys don't spend the time to get tailored yeah that's my tip short hair gray tailor the suit that's about 40 pounds gonna look goodness there's that there's that too have you ever been like uh uninvited to a wedding or to a wedding party because they're like hey we can't have you in the pictures because you're gonna look way better than mm-hmm that's never happened to me had you get invited to be in a lot of wedding parties that does also doesn't happen okay that's why that's exactly the dots you're too good looking for your friends okay yeah yeah um all right I have we play a little game yes when I when we do our

research we just read wikipedia but then google has this fun thing that said people also ask oh yeah so I'm gonna ask that those but just remember I'm not asking people are asking so don't get mad I know what this is I know this game yeah I know where this is headed no this yes this see my spider suspense is telling me that this is headed to a place where you just get to ask shitty questions no but you get to say that people people I'm not asking I know what I know okay first question that people ask how much is rob willow's net worth people are asking that people are asked I'm not I know you're not you I would appreciate if you answer the people I don't disappoint the people rob um uh I jeez I have a theory that people are always worth way more than you think or way

less than you think that's a good theory um I think that's right right because like the people who are worth less will always overstate it and like you know be brash about it and then if you have if you actually have billions you're not going to be walking around which is why which is why donald trump never wants to release attack it's purely that right it's one billion percent right right the people think he has more money than he does right so how much do you have how much do you got uh oh actually you know what better question no how much money do you have on you right now none famous for it so you know why because you're famous for never having my famous for never having money on here's why so it's gfk by the way um good company because I'm usually in wardrobe

and you don't carry your own wallet in your wardrobe so you get you get out of the habit of carrying your wallet so who carries it for you I have people for that okay get a body man all right I think you just answered the question by the way because you didn't answer it you probably have more money than we think that was part of my master plan yes that's right to see that the other one is uh how old is Rob Lowe now people are asking that I don't I don't I don't lie nobody how people can't lie about their age anymore can't no I don't think so I don't think they can do it in the age of the internet little league world series that's about it here's the weird thing is I've actually stopped counting and I forget but I actually was reminded of it recently I'm 53 is it right

54 is Sunseng 4 54 my Sunseng 54 all right so that was that was the people ask the other one was now that we know you don't have money the other one people are asking is is it true Rob Lowe once gave a couple of podcasters $5,000 because he likes them so much not true okay people were asking that not true we're asking that I'm happy that we got to the bottom of that yes yes um okay we we want to do a table reading yeah so yeah you have that yeah all right so we're gonna do a table reading from Wayne's world I'm going to play these what part of Wayne Campbell I fucked it up I will play the part of Garth Algar and you're gonna play the part Rob of Benjamin assuming yes Wayne lesson we need to have a little talk about Banner off the fact is he's the sponsor and you signed

a contract guaranteeing him certain concessions one of them being spot on the show well that's where I see things just a little differently contractor no I will not bow to any sponsor well I'm sorry you feel that way but basically it's just the nature of the beast maybe I'm wrong on this one but for me the beast doesn't include selling out Garth you know what I'm talking about right it's like people only do these things because they can get paid and that's just really sad I can't talk about it anymore it's giving me a headache here take two of these ah new print little yellow different look you can stay here in the big leagues and play by the rules or you can go back to the farm club in Aurora that's your choice yes and it's the choice of a new generation

and see that was great um all right let's uh wrap it up we got the seed key question you promo code take if you want to go see a winning team figure out where Rob Lowe is going to see a game then put in promo code take you at ten dollars off you said before we started you wanted to interview us so go ahead hot shot uh oh my god I got like journalist yeah I got butterflies yeah basically uh sources QAnon for sports okay so so explain to me explain to me the definition of a football guy all right oh good question uh you know when you see it yeah it's like pornography you can't it's so it's a football guy is a guy you see it it's a it's a guy who lives and breathes football obsessed with football football is number one you know how sometimes people like

well god's number one then my family then football football guys football is always number one they're late in the office you know they're staying late overnight they're sleeping in the office they uh talking a lot of cliches they take everything very literally too so it in terms of like motivational techniques they'll tell you that uh you have to get gassed up and so then they'll put cans of gasoline and all your workers to remind you very play with a lot of juice this week and then they hand out boxes of juice that you can't drink but you have to look at yes that sort of thing they now to contradict one point big cat made they are god they'll tell you that they're god guys yeah but they're not actually they're not they just don't go to church they say they say god

family football so who's on the mount rushmore i think the football guys did you do this it was very contentious yeah so uh it would be on your mount rushmore i'll flip it on you gruden yep yeah man definitely right yes madden yes madden's a great one yes uh you got this right yeah you got this right uh you got i think you got to put harbaugh yep yep right so that's you're on the right track you know these yeah so i i know a football guy when i see one yes absolutely now but it's not just being old school though because i don't think it's that because i don't i don't think i'm not sure bare brian's a football guy and i said i don't know i'm not sure woody haze well i don't know here's here's a good example we went to ram's camp we interviewed coach sean mcvay

yes and we've had the debate whether he's a football guy or not because he's got kind of manicured uh facial hair but he also talks like a gruden so that's a very football guy thing he basically has let all of his coaches that he's had uh almost get into his brain and change his dialect and he also has a phrase for ram's camp for the rams this year the standard is the standard which makes absolutely no sense but then when you ask him about it he's like this is what it means and like he goes on this whole thing so that is like a football oh the standard is the standard is is football guys again it's right so he and he's 32 and he's a football and then you ask him what it means and he says there are four p's that go into it and then three of the p's are the exact same

thing right it's like very football guy preparation what was the other one that was uh practice preparation planning planning yeah those are three of the four p's were the exact same thing yeah that sounds really complicated yeah it's they create complicated cliches to basically say i want to make everyone tough is bellichick's not a football oh yeah yes he is ultimate he's the ultimate football guy because if you watch how he um the perfect example of bellichick being a football guy if he does a press conference and someone asks him a stupid question yes he'll just like shoot him off like i have no time oh no no it's yeah if someone asks him a detailed football question he will talk forever because you can see him light up here's my eye if i thought the entertainment community

and the public generally really could understand bill bellichick on site i absolutely was going to do the next red carpet as bellichick i would love to get away with what he gets away with yes that we're like i don't know the code black just got canceled but how do you feel about that i make the show i don't i don't i don't i don't i don't program it i'm on this insanity i'm on to i'm on to the next show yeah i mean just like don't worry about it it'd be so great to do a press conference a la bill bellichick oh my god you should and now that you said it people won't think you're as big of a dick when you do it so that's the thing i feel if i did it they'd be like you've played to the seed now yeah but if i wear the hoodie which he doesn't wear anymore yeah head

so hoodie the cutoff sleeves that he's got so good it's referred to movies as films just yeah we're gonna watch the film we're gonna watch uh i don't go back look the film see if you can do anything differently yeah exactly so you got it with that voice yeah all right rob lowe this was awesome yeah thanks for coming on this was a bucket list one that's fun awesome appreciate it yeah and uh get us those dates so we can put yeah yeah for sure yeah yeah and whatever cash you have yeah sure the five grand i was that's what you want please can you can you all right real journalists yeah uh you're so rich you don't even know how much money you have i have somebody carry the wall thanks guys that interview with rob lowe was brought to you by fandall it's official we're now

fantasy guys and more importantly not only are fancy guys but we're fandall guys big cat and i have something special for all the award-winning listeners on fandall the season we're going to be running a season long 16 week contest with you guys you're going to be able to enter every week and big cat and i are going to be playing against award-winning listeners all season there'll be a season-long leaderboard and the first place winner is going to win a trip to the barstool superbowl party in atlanta and not only that but places two through fifty will win an autograph pmt car stick and we're going to be giving out cool weekly prizes to week one we're going to give away a jersey from the pile we've got a lot of jerseys that are laying in big cats pile that has

actually it's more of a structure now yes i've got a little pile going on under my desk we'll pick something out of there it'll be well i'm sure we have your size so we're going to give away a jersey from the pile just sign up at fandall.com slash pmt to play with us we're fandall guys because fandall is different this season you don't need to be a fancy expert to win there and fandall has never been more fun or easier to play fandall's got more ways to play for guys like us they're even running a two hundred fifty thousand dollar free survivor contest that's the biggest free survivor contest ever and it locks week one so get signed up now we're going to be playing on fandall all season we need every award-winning listener to come play with us if you don't give fandall a shot

you're pretty much saying that you don't want to hang out with big cat and me at the superbowl plus new users get a twenty dollar bonus when they make their first deposit on fandall come play with us at fandall.com slash pmt that's fandall.com slash pmt the interview is also brought to you by upstart upstart has revolutionized how we borrow money by going beyond the traditional FICO score to offer personal loans taking into account factors like job experience and education when determining your interest rate it's quick it's easy checking your upstart rate is free and has no effect on your credit score your upstart rate check tastes just two minutes and if you're approved you can get your funds as soon as the next business day upon approval pay

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will have two two hard copies delivered to us tomorrow and we will start doing the 15 seconds with rick patino book review until we get through the whole book starting next week but rick patino says in that book rick patino believes it's unlikely he will return to coaching he's finished he has said it himself he's finished it's not the first time he said he was finished he's finished though he's done he's definitely but is he also done i think he's i don't know i think he's finished but not done okay he seems like a natural fit in this new era of a shorter shot clock true good point yeah there's it's only two two lifetimes basically for every every every single possession uh so done so finished but not done yeah but it will only take a little

bit time for him to come back that's true yeah 20 minutes give him 20 minutes and he won't be finished anymore i'll be ready to go that's very true yes no jokes no jokes hank do you have any no jokes to make about rick patino i'll never do that okay yeah you are a man of integrity in honor so when we um get you know when the patinos come after us we're going to be like that guy because they're coming hank he didn't say anything about rick patino ejaculating in 15 seconds on the floor of a italian restaurant while it was on his leg yeah so it's all but he was on the floor so so he was so he was down he was down yeah he's down he was down by his shin was down uh huh yeah exactly okay all right uh next up we have locker

room top oh from one from one to the next rick we have locker room talk with jerry jones pft you have an excerpt from a book what is this book so it's the new book that's about the nfl okay it's i i should probably do more research on it but it is okay it's out there yeah it's out there someone figure out what book this is supposed to be really bad it is the league's worst nightmare the book the nfl doesn't want you to read oh they didn't want to publish they didn't want to publish and so jerry jones sat down with the author and uh talked about how he has been a success in life during his uh how he's managed to enjoy his various undertakings as a young man jones said he did a stint as a shoe salesman which he loved he then said something about

spending the afternoon masturbating overselling shoes wait what i've sold shoes jones said again and i've masturbated in my shoes okay then we've all been there i said trying to be reassuring author's note i've never masturbated into my shoes or anyone liar we're deteriorating jones acknowledged but here's my point i can tell you when i was selling them shoes and i've sold a bunch of shoes and i've sold insurance i promise you the shoe itself won't get it done the policy itself won't get it done unless you're having fun so what jerry jones is suggesting is to sell the product of the nfl just all the players need to be jacking off during the game yes okay into shoes and well deal his choice of where he finished right got it so yeah but jerry jones apparently masturbated

overselling shoes now we can embrace debate over what that means if he actually ejaculated into the shoes i'd say yeah it was pretty clear cut out the middle man no it was pretty clear yeah it was pretty guys they they go half-assed this yeah this is a guy who if you remember had uh some very he he didn't make a mistake when he used glory hole over and over no now we know for sure that jerry jones glory hole guy also i've come to realize jerry jones is drunk more often than not yeah i would say the majority of times i'd say like 90 like his his blood is just always has a resting level of alcohol in it it's like it's like a oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico you know like you can get the oil out but it's always good there's always that sheen on the water that's jerry jones

blood oh i was gonna say a little sheen of alcohol in it and also on his loafers too yes just semen yeah exactly sheen's everywhere in his face yeah because of plastic surgery so he's just glimmering everywhere very true yes he's just that's why that's why he's got nephews hanging out around him with handkerchiefs all the time yeah because he's got just gotta be wiped his glasses have the sheen on him yes jerry jones is actually that member that orb that uh president trump touched with like the saudi yeah whoever guy yeah yeah that's actually just jerry jones it was just jerry jones smiling because they had a new oil deal god damn jerry jones okay so it's been the afternoon masturbating over selling shoes so to clean this up we still have guys on chicks we got to navigate

through talking tennis i just realized that why don't we save why don't we save talking tennis this has been you know what let's just say roger fader lost yeah okay okay that's done done we're not a requetino joke tank guys on chicks so there's this guy like and nothing is wrong with him what's wrong with him red flag oh yeah big red flag he's too nice it's like the old brian cox if a man doesn't have a vice he's trying to a serial killer yeah here a little piece of information a little piece of advice to anybody that might be a new relationship fuck up big time in like the first two weeks yeah because it's always easy to like make up at that point but then you've kind of set the expectation that you're not a saint

right never trust anyone who's too nice that's always just we always have your guard up for someone who's too nice i'm just gonna go what's the red flag with this guy he's got a second family yeah it sounds like a second family or he's a serial killer yeah probably because probably maybe both yeah dead family at home hey hank and big cat sup pft sup up until about a year ago no one had ever asked to spit in my mouth now three different men have wanted to spit in my mouth during sex is this a hot in the street thing i don't know about or am i giving off a weird vibe these days and how do i make it stop you might you might just look dehydrated well let's throw it back to hank is this hot in the streets are people spit in each other's mouths i think it's like it's like the new

ass season season it is yeah holy i don't think people are actually doing it but they like to talk about doing it you've seen this person has started to date a lot of guys that watch some weird porn that's what's going on spit in hank's mouth right now just so we can see what it looks like okay weird fuck all right around the room trust tree have you guys ever spat in had anybody spit in your mouth have you been on the receiving end no no no have you no no i mean neither i was there to say trust now we all have to spit in each other's i was just i was like all right just make sure that you guys didn't do it either it's totally normal okay spit in mouths all right let's do it 2018 baby i'm saying it's a new as the new ass season by the way did

you see the most 2018 story of all time uh who was it killed man is no the guy on the pod race who the fuck was it it was uh god damn it i'm already will Myers he had to apologize for bashing his manager during a fortnight stream i did see that yeah such unbelievable yeah i'd rather have my mouth spit into than have somebody insult me on a on a twitch yeah absolutely great segue uh my boyfriend said he gets the same feeling when he wins in fortnight that he does when he orgasms when having sex with me yeah does this mean i'm good at sex or bad at sex great yeah amazing it means that it means that every single male between the age of 15 and 16 in the entire country wants to have sex yeah hey pmt boys especially pft so i was curious on what to do about this reoccurring

situation that happens every time my best friend is around and we all drink my boyfriend seems to get carried away drinking and jokingly says that my best friend should join us in a threesome should i cave in should i cave in and test his theory or should i keep laughing at him as if he were joking so well yeah what you guys are doing right now is playing a game of joke chicken yeah so he is joking that you won't do it and you're like should i jokingly call his blood you guys are just going to have a threesome yeah but do it as a joke and then it doesn't count yeah just wear a clown suit yeah put on pick up put on red floppy shoes and white makeup and uh do it inside of suer play the yakity sax music during your entire threesome yeah that's a joke yeah does it count oh my boyfriend

likes to listen to really girly music sometimes so what girly music is okay all of it what one what are the ones that are not allowed i already know he's the beta of this relationship oh no but is it getting worse what girly songs are allowed i would say like all yeah basically all of them basically every girly song and you know what there are just guys who uh like to get dominated so congrats to your boyfriend yeah he knows his place or lazy yeah that's if you just get lazy then you can just start to accept your feminine sign you're like yeah just dominate me because i'm too lethargic to be on top yeah right all right last one uh hey pmt boys especially big cat with the juicy taint oh i was wondering what workouts i think to do to also have a taint juicier than

lemonade oh uh uh we discussed kegels can women joke i think kegels is the female version of jelking right yeah i think it's just that one machine that you just press your your pussy together and you you have your friend videotape it and you put it up on instagram that's it that if you do that machine all day in your yoga pants and put it up on instagram that's a very important part of the workout uh i think you will have a juicy taint yeah you remember that the thymaster thing the blue foam with the red oh yeah thing that went on the vagina we bought that we did yeah yeah we tried it for like one there was a while we were trying to get juicy pussy i had a tight pussy fear about a week yeah we did i was i was doing that underneath my desk while everyone well everyone was just

being a worker b i was getting my juicy juicy pussy going my juice my juicy my juicy yeah there you go my juicy this is hot let's get my juicy it's probably been the most sexual episode of pardon my take yeah when you're taking to god rob low and then us backing it up true yeah you should nut it at least three or four times i will see you guys on friday love you guys me oh yes i read about that in the bible you know who i am you shine away what a special friend you are i'll be coming for you anyway i was just making some popcorn did you ever watch people using real heavy equipment

did you ever watch people using real heavy equipment have you ever had a checkup have you by any chance lost your kitty well i have her you what a special friend you are say it's pardon my take presented by barstool sports