Pardon My Take - Sam Darnold, Mt Rushmore Of Pisses, Joey Chestnut Is The GOAT American, Britney Spears vs Vic + Monday Reading

Episode Date: July 10, 2023

We're back from 4th of July and have a lot to talk about. Joey Chestnut is the greatest american ever. Threads happened and we're over it. Hank is taking the summer off so leave him alone. Victor Wembanyama vs Britney Spears (00:00:00-00:26:03). Who's back of the week including Wimbledon, eating, UFC and more (00:26:03-00:59:38). Sam Darnold joins the show to talk about TEU, his career, seeing ghosts and actually seeing ghosts at George Kittle's house, Adam Gase's hyperdrive, USC and more. (00:59:38-01:31:56) Mt Rushmore of best pisses (01:31:56-01:56:08) . We finish up with Monday Reading The Reply Guys Who Won, Repeatedly commenting on your crush's twitter posts is a terrible dating strategy...until it isn't (01:56:08-02:10:39).You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey part of my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen, add free on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we have Sam Darnold on the show. We interviewed him at TEU. It was awesome in-person. Great talking to Sam Darnold. We also have the Mount Rushmore of Pisses. Piss, great Mount Rushmore. We're back after the week off July 4th. So we got a lot to talk about. We got Who's Back of the Week. We got a Monday reading. And it is all brought to you by the greatest beer ever created. That is Coors Light. I've seen the mountains. They are so blue. Being tweeted at us. It has been a great

week for Corsair Light. Everyone thinks about the day they'll eventually get to retire and enjoy all the freedom that comes with it, especially you Hank. But who says we have to wait decades before we get to kick back and chill out. Take advantage of that free will and spend the summer chilling like a retiree, Hank, and pair those moments with Corsair Light to be here that's made to chill. It's a beer that's made to chill. Pairs well with a retired state of mind, Hank, the mountains on the bottles and cans, even turn blue when your beer is called. So you know, when it's time to grab another per for all your

all your summer plans, relax there of no judgment here. This summer chill, like you're retired with Cors Light, get Cors Light delivered straight to your door, drizzle or in scar by going to course light calm slash take Celebrate responsibly course brewing company golden Colorado Course light calm slash take course light the coldest best beer ever created. It is summertime It is course light time tweet us those mountains when they turn blue nothing better in the world Celebrate responsibly course brewing company Golden Colorado. Okay, let's go. It's part of my take.

Is anybody? Barstay sports. Welcome to part of my take today is Monday, July 10th. And the boys are back. Hello, boys. Hello, boys. Hello, boys. Good to see all of you. It's a great, great to be back.

We had the week of 4th July off. So we haven't talked to the people in a while. I hope everyone enjoyed Dungeons & Dragons on Friday. I certainly did Tim Woods' a legend. But boys, where should we start? I mean, I actually think I was thinking about I was trying to recap everything that happened this past week. And there's only one way to start.

And I know everyone's been like, oh, Victor, Wembe and Yana and Britney Spears, no. It's our guy, Joey Chessnut, being the greatest American of all time. And saving literally saving the 4th of July for America. Yeah, that's when he goes between being the greatest athlete to ever compete in a sport to being an absolute legend, a living legend, the Paul Bunyan of chugging glizzlies. Because this dude was fucking, he walked out of the locker room when they canceled the event and the look on his face was just one of utter sheer determination.

I said that they should put that face on money. That should be a portrait that exists on what like a $4 bill, however much a hot dog costs. That should be on that denomination of currency because he was determined he was going to make that thing happen, come hell or high water, and then he stepped out there and yeah, it wasn't his best performance, but given the circumstances, he absolutely, he's still dominated everybody and put his best foot forward, continued the streak. Dude is a legend. He, I mean, they tried to freeze him out. We know what happens to the buns. He told us what happens to the buns when they sit out, they get stale. They're harder to eat.

He's still dominated. 16th championship. I know that people think maybe we get a little hyperbolic when we talk about Joey Chessna in terms of the greatest of all time. I don't think we are doing it enough because this past 4th of July, not only did he cement himself even further better than everyone else,

never going to be touched, but he's also maybe on a short list of greatest Americans of all time. He saved the sport. He saved the eating. Like the list of people that you can count that have done something of that magnitude, it's Joey Chastano and it's Teddy Roosevelt when he saved football. Yeah. When he changed, when he turned it into the woke football league,

we were not allowed to have people die on the field anymore. But it was like, it was such a great moment because we were all bummed out when the hot dog eating contest was canceled. Everybody was just pissed off. Like, what are we gonna do before the barbecue starts? This is what we do every Fourth of July. It's appointment television.

We get amped up about it. And he just just he as an individual made sure that it happened he's like we're gonna do this fucking thing yeah and then he did the fucking thing and then he did the fucking thing he is yeah he's up there right if we did a new Mount Rushmore of greatest Americans of all time it's Joey Chestnut who else get TJ off get Thomas Jefferson get Thomas Jefferson on the fraud overrated Arnold Schwarzenegger. I'm trying to think who else.

If you're talking just like sucking down hot dogs, I feel like Nancy Reagan might have a say of it. It's been a while since she's gone viral for being the throat code. I imagine she competed in the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest. That would be a matchup. Yes. A hologram, Nancy Reagan. Yes.

That would be great if we just did. It's like when they do like what this horse would look like against secretariat. And they just did that as an animation. Maybe you get like the Monday night football graphics going again. And once you get down, it's like Mike and Iks. She swall on them like pills.

Tick tacks. Yeah. She's like a, yeah, she's like, when you give your, your dog pills, you just put them into like a little peanut butter capsule. Nope. Boom. No, it was great. I was, I was so happy that we at least got to have the contest. It was, it was a great moment for America. It really was. It really was. The other things that so Victor Wemba Nyama, welcome to America, buddy. No way to like be introduced to our culture and our world and have Britney Spears try to grab your ass and then have it become like an international incident on your

second week in this country. I still don't really know what the big issue was watching the video. I like what was the, she tried to grab him, a security guard kind of swiped and then she almost hit herself in the face. Yeah, and the news came out, because when the poor came out the day before and everyone used their own imagination thinking that his security guard like punched her in the face. Yeah.

And then once the video came out, I was like, oh, this is like, this is nothing. Yeah. I'll be honest with you, this was a story that I saw the headline and I was like, okay, I don't really need to read past this headline. I'm not sure if this even happened.

It was like TMZ needed something right about it. So, and they are the king, it's them and our good friend Robert Little at Black Sports Online, TMZ and BS, so they know how to write a fucking headline. They do. And so they got everybody's attention on an otherwise slow news day. It would it would be great if like the most shocking part is

Britney Spears knows who Victor Webin Yama is. Maybe a big like hoop head. Like maybe she's a baller, but that would be great if like ESPN hired her for for maybe some of the vacancies on NBA countdown. Like how great would that be? Brittany, Brittany knows ball. How high did she have to reach up in the air to grab his ass? Yeah, I, it's, I imagine that his ass is probably like above the top of her head.

And I probably, yeah, it's, I gotta say, because he, he's playing right now in a summer league game and I think he's playing better than his first one. I know that we're a Victor Remedy on the podcast. We've staked our reputation on it. Everyone will remember this. It would be so fucking funny if he was a bust. No, no, no, Bickett, I think you're kind of misconstruing what our point was.

Like we, we're already right about Victor Remedy on the, you said that he's the best prospect. That's true. He should be a draft. What he does with that from this point on, we're already right about Victor Wim and Daniel. We just said that he's the best prospect and he had to be a draft. What he does with that from this point on, that's on him, but he went first overall, we nailed that one. So if he's a bus, that would be funny, right? Like that would be pretty funny. No, Hank, you might not.

I don't think he's gonna be a bus. No, I don't think so either. I don't think so either, but it would be kind of funny. It would be very funny, yes. Good, so pretty sad. Buster sad. Yeah, I get that. I get that.

Like Greg Odin, like that sad. Yeah. That was different though. That was like more about injuries. If he just like wasn't good at playing basketball, you know, okay, you're right man. That's impossible with his size. The only way is a bus is if injuries.

Okay, so I agree Hank bus are sad. What if he just sucked really bad this year and then became like an all-time great? That would be funny. Yeah. So how many first round picks to the Thunder have right now? They've got like, I know they have 35 draft picks. I think like 15 of them are first round picks.

I think they have one of the Rams picks. Is it possible for the Thunder to like, what would be the amount of first round picks. I think they have one of the Rams picks. Is it possible for the Thunder to, like what would be the amount of first round picks that the Spurs would accept for Victor Wimmy Niyama? Oh, I don't know, but the Thunder don't need it, they have chat. I can't wait to watch Chet and Victor go at it. Like, we've got Victor Wimmy Niyama at home.

Victor Wimmy Niyama at home, Chet Wimmy. Yeah, it's gonna be, like I actually think both of them will be relieved when they play each other because they know that they're not gonna get bodied. They're just gonna like pure wet around each other for, you know, 48 minutes and just like do a little dance.

I actually think that when they play against each other, they're going to see that as an opportunity for them to be able to back down somebody finally. Yeah, so they're gonna start like throwing their tiny little bodies around into each other. Yeah. Yeah. Be like, look at this. I'm a real man. Yeah. It will be a mono, e mono. But yeah, that was, uh, that was quite the story. That was also one of those like, hey, we're in the middle of July, not a lot to talk about. Let's just run the, the

Victor Wembenyama Britney Spears storyline for four days straight. Yeah. It was pretty good. It was a, It was a great headline. Yeah. I have a, Goddamn, I feel really, really old and I wish that I didn't read this today. Oh no. So the nationals drafted Dylan Cruz from LSU. That dude's a beast by the way. LSU players went one and two in the MLB draft.

Yeah, Skins went to the pirates. Yeah. And they asked Dylan Cruz, like who his idols were growing up playing baseball. And he said that as a kid, he modeled his swing after Bryce Harper. Oh! Yeah, I wish that he had never said that.

I already love him, because he's gonna be an awesome player, and Major League Baseball is a great college player, but I just really wish he had said any name except for Bryce Harper. Dude, that's kind of like we we joked about it when Brandon Miller said that Paul George was his goat, but I saw another clip of another prospect being like Paul George my favorite player. And I was like, this is this maybe is like what this is what the future is like we need to stop saying like MJ LeBron, just ask like,

who is your favorite player? Because for a lot of these kids, like if you're 18 years old, what is that? Do the math? 2015 is when you were 10 years old. When so you, you were too young, probably to like even understand the heat LeBron. That's crazy. Yeah. That is nuts. My deli was my favorite

player growing up. That's a bummer. I can't believe you just told me that. That's sorry. Um, all right. Other news, Damien Lillard, I, I'm so sick of him. I already was sick of him, but I'm more sick of him. The report, I don't know if that it came from him, but maybe his agent basically being like, I want to go to the heat and nowhere else. I he's he's done a really good job of taking like the best good will that any players ever had and just finding like, how quickly can I, can I road all of this? Yeah, I don't know how serious he's about that. I mean, he does want to go to the heat obviously, but when he says, I don't want to play, I won't play for any other team. If they do trade him to a different team,

is he really just going to sit out the entire time? That would be great. He's going to have to lead that in him. But I think that's the only leverage that he has is to say that he would do that. I don't know if he'd actually fall through, but you know what they should do? Threads, the new Twitter,

that should just be a Dame Lillard free app. No Dame Lillard discussion on threads. I'm down for it. By the way, should we talk about threads? I'm'm already it was fun for like two and a half days. Yeah. Yeah, me too. I just yeah, I don't know. I don't know what to do with it now because I just don't there's nothing. It's too nice. It's a bunch of people like trying to go viral by being like Asking like questions like what what is everyone having for dinner and shit like that? I tried to play that game for like a day and a half got bored like I I think I'm done. I think I'm done

Yeah, you know, it's part yeah, yeah, you can't delete it or you're gonna delete your Instagram as well If you try to delete your Instagram as well. If you try to delete your Instagram account. Oh, god. Damn, it's so crazy. You crafty, you crafty minks. That's why I never got it. It is funny. It is funny like on a bigger scale of like the,

all the like anti-Elon guys being like, well, Zuck will, Zuck will save us. The guy who like, he's like four years ago, like the whole country was having a crisis about Zuckerberg like, you know, like swaying elections and all this shit and like how he was like this. He had to go to Congress. Yeah, he had to go to Congress. Like no, no, he's not Elon. It's cool. We'll just give him all of our information. We have the collective memory of a goldfish in this country. It's really, it's really

wild. That that zuck is now the good guy in a battle between like, zuck and Elon Musk. I think they both suck, but it's, it was fun for the first two days because everybody pretty much treated thread like it was a burner account. Yeah. Like, like, like, what they said there didn't matter at all. And there's definitely going to be some people that do get canceled for their jobs in like seven years when they look back at what you put on thread for like the first two days. When everybody was just like firing off takes left and right, it's like, oh, it's a new social

media app. It was like Twitter in 2009, 2010, where people just like saying whatever, like 10 years from now, there's going to be a congressperson that has to get in front of a microphone, be like, it was the lyrics to a rap song that I was putting up there, okay? Listen, it was thread. It was the Wild West at this point, it wasn't real. But yeah, I got, I'm with you, Bicat. I have not been on thread in the last two days

after just like doing nothing but random top 10 lists of things. And then it's like, oh yeah, that app. Oh yeah, I remember that one. Yeah, the first day and a half was exciting. It was like, because there's nothing going on. Ooh, new app. And then as soon as I realized that I was following a bunch of people that I'm

Following for their pictures not their thoughts And now they're giving me their thoughts. I don't need their thoughts Yeah, let's guys and girls. That's guys and girls Yeah, I was still over for his pictures. Yeah, well, we're The the the JLo one I got to find it JLo had one where I was like I think I'm I think it was The moment I was like I think I'm done with this app forever She hold on I got to find it because it was it was a it was everyone's just too nice to they're all like Everyone's like oh this is nice. I'm getting here. Do you see daincook?

He was like this place is so nice like all these all this is nice. I'm getting here. Do you see Dane Cook? He was like, this place is so nice. Like all this community that we built. Like, dude, we've been on this for a fucking 24 hours. What are you talking about? Really strange stuff. It's very strange. It also sucks having to, first thing in the morning, now there's another app that you have to log onto

and see what's going on. Now you've got to go Twitter, Instagram, Thread, right in the morning, or else you're gonna feel like I'm missing out on something. And you know what's gonna happen. That's the thing, thread. I feel like if anything happens on thread, it's just gonna be on Twitter and probably

vice versa. Yeah. I don't think you need both. Um, JLo said, next thread, hummingbirds appear to me in some of the most important moments of my life. What's your spirit animal? I was like, I can't do this. I can't.

This is why we have bullying on Twitter. Sloths. Like, we cleaned out Twitter to be brutally honest about everything. Sloths because they're lazy and they sleep all day and you only see when you're on vacation, Hank. Yeah. Did you see your theories prove corrected?

The island boys were making out on Twitter. Oh yeah, well, I know that that's true. Yeah, twins. All twins. All twins of Kist. The island boys were making out on threads. I actually never saw it. It was for only fans.

They have an only fans. They were kissing and then they're like, come check out our only fans. I saw it on Twitter. Okay. Said it was on threads. That should be the sign that the internet was a bad idea. It's the whole thing is a bad sign that the internet was a bad idea. It's the whole thing is a bad idea.

I'm officially a bad idea. It's like people are if if twin boys are making out with each other to drive subscriptions to their only fans as a promotional stunt, everyone needs to log off. There should be you should not be allowed to use the internet in the summer. I like I like yeah, I like it. It's like twin brothers kissing we we were fine with the guy who's just publicly Been letting his wife get rail for the last week Yeah, it's been it really is in terms of like the internet delivering on it on down sports times It was fun for that like I appreciated Zach doing it when he did it

because there really was nothing going on. And like, hey, let's all fuck around on an app for a couple days. And then we'll forget it until some type of controversy happens and we'll go back on it. And then we'll forget it again. Yeah, it did feel a nice purpose there. It gave us something to do for those two down days. I've got, I had another drunk idea where you get into that real quick

because I'm sure that a lot of people out there have thought about this at some point but we need to make it happen as a reality. I've been playing a lot of golf recently. I've gone out with Hank a couple of times here in Chicago and they need to make a fucking golf ball with a chip in it that you can locate on your phone. When you lose it in the woods or in a bush or in tall grass, we've spent what like 50

billion dollars on an F-22 to shoot down a high air balloon. I think that the technology exists out there to put a chip at a golf ball. They have 20,000 of them at every top golf that you go to. Now I understand the naysayers will be like, well, then you won't have to buy new golf balls because you'll just always be able to find them. No, that's how you use American ingenuity. You make the chips slowly wear down so they are only good for like a couple months and then you have to re-up on new balls. But this needs to happen. I know that we probably have somebody out there from Taylor May this listening right now. Let's make a golf ball with a chip in it. We're way overdue for that. Apple tag.

Yeah. Apple tag, you're tagging. They got it. They have it. They created that. Taylor made TP5. Oh, he's reading the onion right now. No, TP5 is the best golf ball.

I mean, TP5 is the best golf ball. Um, yes. But I use TP, I have an entire rack of Tp5s and I burn through it like nobody's business because there's shut up, hang. There's not a chip in them. So I lose them all the time. Give me a bowl with a chip in it. It's not that hard.

You have to worry about it because like if you go in the water, you're not going to go get it. Yeah. If you hit it in deep grass, you're not going to go get it. You're still going to have to buy your balls. Yeah, I want you to chip explodes in the water. Yeah. There are GPS goal goal falls.

They're about to be. Okay. Well, they need to be, they need to be $30 a ball. Yeah. To everyday life. Yeah, but so PFT, the only downside if we're, if we're just in the trust tree and we're just, you know, like, pretend we're in shark tank, what then like, it kind of is a bad thing because like, I'll hit in the woods. And then I'll just like wait till no one's looking and then like it kind of is a bad thing because like I'll hit in the woods

and then I'll just like wait till no one's looking and then drop it right by the woods. That's fine. Yeah. I mean if you're gonna cheat you're gonna cheat anyway. Right. But like people like you know you you want to I don't want to know where my ball is. People like why do you have so many balls you only need one ball it's like well I don't want to hit it out of like when I because I hit it out of bounds, I hit it out of bounds. Yeah. Oh, me too. And I'll just like, if it's more than 100 yards off the fairway, I'll probably just let it go. Oh, if I can't see the ball within like the first pass through, it's like that, that one's gone forever. It would make golf so much more fun. The rounds would go faster. It would be better. Let's, let's make it happen.

I'll, I'll put my name behind this one. I'll help Taylor made develop a cheap, economically feasible, powerful, and shippin' in it. What's that smile, dude? What was that smile? No, no, no, what was that smile before? I can't develop, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I was thinking, I remember the track thing, and then it also me and P.H. were playing yesterday, and he a couple of times was playing like legitimately, like two fairways over.

Yeah. It was funny when I heard when he was like, if it's a hundred yards away, he was like, no, not a good line. Not a good fairway. Got a good line. But the fairway after. Yeah, if I'm in the other fairway,

I'm definitely gonna play it, I'm in a fairway. It's a great shot. Yeah, no, no, just maybe small. Yeah, if I'm in the other fairway, I'm definitely gonna play it. I'm in a fairway. It's a great shot. Yeah, no, no, no, just maybe small. Yeah, good. I'm glad that we could make you laugh. Some of us, Hank, some of us can't get out there and golf seven to nine times a week.

Yeah, I mean, this is a, yeah, whatever, whatever. For everyone, by the way, who's giving Hank shit this summer, just know, just know that before the summer started, he did sit me in PFT down. He's like, I'm not working this summer. So he said that to us. Yeah, it's the summer.

That's not exactly how I said it. Yeah, he's like, guys, just you know, I'm not going to work this summer. But once football season starts, he's into work mode. He's going to work like you've never seen him. Never. No, it's ever going to work. I don't have an office. I can to. The golf course is literally the only my accentuary.

You can't make a deal is out on the golf course. Yeah, so he did. If the office was open, I'd be there. Yeah, but you leave me no choice. He did alert us that he will not be working this summer. So lay off him, okay? Lay off. We're not blindsided by this.

I was shocked. Just making fucking shit. I was shocked when he texted us. PFT was like, hey, I have a vacation plan. It's like, dude, you told us we're working this summer. What do you mean? A vacation plan? Yeah. Do you mean August? Yeah. What the only vacation you would plan is to work. Like I'm a vacation plan. I'm going to work for a week. Actually, not even, I guess this guy kind of fits this false narrative that you guys are trying to spin, but I am going to- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Did you or did you not say I'm not working with someone? No, I said, you know, I'm going to enjoy myself with someone because we don't have an office to work out of. And once the fall comes, we're going to be living in the office, but you guys spend that to be not working. I am taking vacation in August to Block Island, which doesn't have a golf course. What? No.

That actually is an anti-vacation. Like, that's work. I'm going to work. You're in prison, basically, if you go out there. How do they not have a fucking golf course? I just don't have one there. I think it's like a, they want it that way. You just got to hit it in the ocean.

Yeah, but that did come over me. I was like, I'm taking all this time off, and I can't even play. Wait, there that one. She's got to hit it in the ocean. Yeah, I but that did come over me I'm taking all this time off and I can't even play wait. There is one No, okay, Billy. I promise you Hey He's the artist he's worked this last month. I was trying to find a single golf course. I'm blocked There's two golf courses. Man. Got to be in Paris.

I mean, only other thing I had for us, Cooper Flag is making waves. And I just want to remind everyone, he was our guy first. The real deal. We had him when we had him when he was 16 years old. We've been grouping two guys, Cooper Flag and Charlie Woods, everyone else back off. He's he's awesome. He just swan balls into the backboard. He had what six blocks in the championship game and and throw an alley oops to himself and everyone who's like well he's going to be a Duke Blue Devil.

I will just choose to just not acknowledge that entire year of his existence. Well you definitely wouldn't have gone to Duke if Coach K was still there. That's true. You would not have fit into Coach K's system. By the way, quick bare season two, recap, awesome, awesome season. Way too much Coach K talk. Yeah, yeah. I was a little subplot, wasn't it? Yeah, it was. It was. But everyone should go watch that show. It's fucking awesome. Is he related to Coach K? No, no, no, it was just watch the show. Okay. It's a watch that show. It's fucking awesome. Is he related? Does he look like it? No, no, it was just watch the show. Okay. It's a very stressful show though.

Yeah. You've ever worked in a restaurant before? You get PTSD from the dinner rushes, all that stuff. You feel like you're back in it. Yeah. Oh, I had a drunk idea too, speaking of restaurant business. I went out to dinner a couple of weeks ago. And when I was finishing finishing I had some leftovers and a dude came up and he was wearing a shirt

It was different than all the other waiters and it was like can I take this for you? I think we could just eat for free if we just show up to really nice restaurants and we just go to like people who are just finishing Being like can I take this for you and then just walk out? Yes, stand there with your hands behind your back, like it was very official. I mean, it's in your piece. You could probably only do it once in each restaurant, but it would work.

I handed him my food, like it was nobody's business being like, this guy will come back with a bag. And yeah, I think I found a way that if we ever fall in hard times, we can just live off of that. Yeah, next time you see a homeless person on the street, don't, don't give them any money, don't give them food. It's like teaching a man to fish as opposed to handing him a fish. Yeah. You go up with a nice van Houston shirt from Coles off the rack. You tell them tuck it

in these khakis, put a belt on, and then you can eat for free at any restaurant in the city. Yes. Yeah. Just be like, just walk up and just kindly say, anyone's just about done. Hey, can I take that for you? Can I bag that up? All right, so should we do who's back? Then we'll get to Sam Donnell, then the Mount Rushmore pisses.

Uh, Let's do it. Hank, who's back in the week? Oh yeah, who's back in the week is Billy Lying. He just, and still some hope into me, but there's definitely not. That's the worst life ever told. Yeah, like what? because Billy lying, he just instilled some hope into me, but there's definitely not. That's the worst life ever told.

Yeah, like what? Like, yeah, but you can't, you can't just, whatever. Block Island club. Yeah. When worth golf course? It's not on block Island. Discover all two golf courses in block island and book your golf holiday today.

All right, give me the location of those, Billy. And then let me know. My other who's back have a couple of the four aces. Oh yeah. Huge. And they are. Huge come back when today. Honestly, I'm not even trolling.

I was watching it. It was interesting like, Camp Smith was winning. He had a chance to birdie 18. And his team would have won and he would have won. He had a two shot league, but he bogeyed it. So his team lost, but he still won the like single, single tournament. And afterwards he was like mad. He was like, how do you feel? He was like, you know, it's kind of mixed emotions because I wish we had won. But the four aces are just a wagon. What are the four aces you got Hank? Dustin Johnson, Patrick Reed, Peter Uline,

Paparez, bang. Nice, bang. They're absolutely zero golf courses on block house. Yeah, I got so positive. Billy just tried to mansplain you. Yeah. But these websites are lying. Well, no, you have to click more than one click

into like a Google search result. And then you can figure that out. I'm on leading courses.com. It says there's two and they're not in lock island. You're like Jamie from the Joe Rogan show. If you only get to let go off the very top, like third of the screen on every time you try to pull up like a Google fat check.

And then my other who's back, it's really who's, you know, who's now is this Vegas globe. Oh yeah. They rolled it out this weekend and it's maybe the coolest thing I've ever seen. Like I feel like it's gonna be everywhere all the time now, Like it's the future.

It's like a giant, I don't even know how you describe it. It's unbelievable. Really, really good. I would fuck the globe. It's a 360 degree LED screen that can be changed and manipulated to look like different things. Like they had sick fireworks on 4th of July.

They make it look like they had an MBA basketball for the summer league. I don't know how much it costs, but like, do you know what? You know what? The craziest part about the Globus? What? Who created it? Yeah.

James Dolen. James Dolen. Wow. James Dolen. There was an article a few years ago. There was basically like the, here's a headline for Get Kevin Kevin Durant, New York Knicks owner James Dolan's actual passing project is building futuristic dome-shaped arenas. So if you're a Knicks fan, you gotta hate this globe, you gotta protest this globe.

I mean, he's really good at designing globes. Yeah, but he literally has been spending the last like 10 years of his life building a globe instead of a basketball tee. Yeah, but look where Kevin Duranta now and look at it this fucking globe. That's true. That's true. Did the globe really go down for a minute? Did you see that picture? Was that Photoshop? Because I don't know. It was, it was, it was somewhat treated it.

It was like Las Vegas local or something. And it was like when your computer screen goes to like a blue screen It was like please restart it ruled. I hope that that's real. That sounds like it might have been Photoshop It probably was yeah, it's got the Xbox red ring a death on it. Yeah That would be awesome to play like video games on the globe dude the globe is the future Yeah, you're obsessed with buildings in Las Vegas. It seems like. No, that's what I'm saying. Like that would fuck, that's quite an afternoon. Like fucking Elegant Stadium and then going over and just using the globe like an anal bead.

Also a special fuck you to like anyone out there who's like, what a waste of resources. Like the world is like, you know, on fire, we're all gonna die. Yeah, dude, if we're gonna die, I wanna watch something cool. I want my TV. I wanna be able to, we're all gonna die. Yeah, dude, if we're gonna die, I wanna watch something cool. I want my TV. I wanna be able to see something cool as I die.

Yeah, wait, so this is actually like a great other thing that we can add to billionaires. If you're a billionaire, you either have to own a sports team of some sort or design something cool for all of us to look at and just have our minds blown by. And if you're a great owner, then do both. I can't wait for the like,

the article that's gonna come out in a month about globe accidents, like people getting in traffic accidents, just look at the globe. Cause I would just stare at that thing. I mean, just mean dollars gonna turn the mecca, they should turn the mecca into a globe. I think he wants to.

I think he wants to build another globe in London. Yeah, I don't see how anyone can see that, but potential investor and be like, I'm in. Like, if you have any amount of money to invest and you're getting offered the chance to invest in that globe, like, you have to say yes. Yeah, what does it do? It just puts cool shit out there.

Yeah, everyone takes pictures of it. It's like, they're gonna, however much it costs to advertise on it, it's better than a billboard. Absolutely. Globe. All right. Is that all your who's back? Uh-huh. That was good. Good job, Hank. PFT. My who's back the week is Bob Huggins. Yes. Bob Huggins is kind of back. It seems like he might be back. I don't know, but he's he's employing a brilliant legal defense right now. He's claiming that he never actually resigned from WVU after he got a DUI. It was less than David Freese's DUI in terms of BAC, but he did, he did get a, a DUI,

a pretty bad one. And they claimed that he resigned at the time. West Virginia University said that he's stepping down from his position as head basketball coach. He is now saying that he never resigned, that his wife sent an email saying that he was maybe going to step down and then they ran with that. And so now he's claiming that he's going to come back and coach West Virginia basketball unless they fire him. And they're kind of the balls in their court at this point. But as far as

a legal strategy goes, I think it's, it sounds pretty iron-clad. It's like my wife sent you an email. I didn't. Yeah, yeah. And if you want to fire me, fire me, and then I get paid at a suit. Yeah, or fire my wife. Yeah. I got hacked by my wife is what he's saying. I, how you, because he already took a pay cut after the radio thing. It feels like he might just go to West Virginia for $1 next year.

That's fine. If this was in Louisiana, they would be like, okay, yeah, that's a good legal adventure back in West Virginia is kind of, they're kind of Louisiana adjacent in terms of how they apply their laws, but that's going to be entire. But because of any walks away from all that money they owe money Yeah, I hope Huggie goes like the Jim Calhoun route and goes and finds

Like a division three school and just get some all in the treadmill and wins all the games Yeah This is school that Exist in a place that doesn't have roads so we can't drive Where would that be just block Island Island have college and roads, Billy? Golf carts? Yeah. No idea.

Yeah. All right. Good who's back? Was you got any others? No, that's just it. I was going to say Billy being a liar too, but Hank took mine. Yeah.

What did I do? What did you? I got a few who's back. First is Wimbledon, talking tennis. Oh, I didn't know. I back first is wimble then Talking tennis. Oh I didn't know I didn't know Federer was fully retired. Oh, yeah, yeah Yeah, I know kind of a cock move. Well, well, Joker which is gonna keep just tallying up wins in his face Oh, I'm not I'm not a fashion guy, but the Speed speed ricking and Justin Thomas were there and I saw the picture I was like how speed looks good Thomas were there. And I saw the picture and I was like,

oh, speed looks good. Like I kind of like his outfit the most. And then he was just getting cooked for his suit not being ironed. Can I say something? And I don't think this is true because Jordan Speed has a lot, a lot of money. But I think I have that same suit.

And I understand what happened because it's like a $500 suit that you buy on Instagram one of those swipe up ads and I'm pretty sure it's the exact same suit and yeah it does it does wrinkle very quickly because it's a $500 suit on Instagram you know when you get those ads they're like you'll never own another suit again I bought one of those and it does wrinkle and it's exactly that same color and it looks exactly like it. I think he's wearing a $500 Instagram suit.

And if you fly some water, go to the suit and you pack a suit, it's gonna be a little bit wrinkly. Like all that travel is gonna make it wrinkly. Then you have to remember, oh, I gotta get my suit pressed after you get to a new city, new country, new hotel. Probably just in half time to get the small. It's a small amount of wrinkles.

It's not a good visual, but it's not like the most wrinkly suit that I've ever seen in my life. Jake find me a picture of The suit I was wearing for the bar stool invitational sentence the group. Oh, I got it. I think I'm wearing the same suit as him So that's the same color but I But I think in its wrinkled and mine wrinkles as well. I think he bought a $500 Instagram suit. There's also make sense. Like there's also a good chance of big cats like,

oh, he has wrinkled suit. I have a wrinkled suit. Dude, they're same color. Look it, look it. Look it. I just say the picture. Okay. Same color, same thing.

Say it looks exactly the same. Same material. I think he went to $500 Instagram suit route. I think that's a different color. Yeah, I gotta see the buttons. We gotta see the, we gotta see the, are those cuff links are we, aren't we? No, no, I don't think so. So like the buttons on the bottom sleeve.

It could be, it looks the same. Yeah. Again, you look good too. I thought it was, I thought it looked fine and then I saw him getting cooked, it was like, well, that's why I don't know fashion. I just, I was like Homer Simpson meme when I was like, I was gonna roast him and then I was like, wait, I think I know exactly what happened here.

And it, listen, it's a comfortable suit. Like it did work. It is, it is cheap. So you're saying he will, he will, but the ad, he will get another suit again. It seems like he might he might It's so the the thing is it's now I'm really gonna just tell myself it's one of those It's I get targeted for a lot of the ads max nose max can back me up the the like hey You ever want a shirt that hides your belly in your tits like get this shirt you never own another shirt and it's just a t-shirt

And you're still fat in it. This is the suit version of that. It's a stretchy material that doesn't iron well. And so it's like, it's like almost like a, it's like a underarm or shirt in a suit form. Is this a fat suit or is this suit? Well, that's one that don't like ironing. I bought it because it was like, this will fit the contours of your body perfectly the linebacker

Everyone says it's known for a line Let me just say this. It's a compelling ad. It's a compelling ad when you see it on your Instagram I have so many of the t-shirts. I have so many of those I will try to confirm through maybe JT if he can figure out what exactly suit he's wearing. So, um, yeah, that was talking to us. I'm like, oh, I like the idea that you and Max get served ads and it's like, dude. It's his body like TJ Watts. Dude.

Yeah, it is. Yeah, I'm not kidding. It's basically the Alex Jones picture in every ad. They're like, do you look fat and frumpy with mantids in your shirts? And it's like some guy like slouched over with like stains on his shirt. He's like, try this shirt.

And it will like, it's like perfectly contoured for wide shoulder guys. Pop your biceps, hide your fat. And then you put it on and it's just a t-shirt. Tight around the biceps, around the waist that's always Always gets I'm like fuck so I'll look jacked and skinny there is a large portion of AWLs listening right now I'm like yep, I know exactly what you're talking about and I get those shirts as well So we stand with you Max and I stand with you

We've been targeted and harassed by Mark Zuckerberg for our body shooting. Yeah, I might look into this. I think it's my story. Dude, this is right. All the sources are in great shape. I'll say the best part of it. I'll say this, you go and you don't get measured for it.

You just go to like medium large. Yeah, I know. It's basically like what body type are you? Fat, husky, sturdy. Hell yeah. It's like only three options. He's good when it comes to those algorithms yeah because he got all your pictures so he knows what your body type is. I get the I get the like lift kit ad like you want to do add an extra one and a half to two inches

to your height. Well then just slip these on in your shoes. I get to make out legends every day. Yeah. It's only that I say over the place. All right, my other one, other who's back is eating, which is actually kind of perfect for this. Eating is back. I don't know if you guys saw this, but there's a new TikTok trend called Girl Dinner. So Girl Dinner, it's, I'll read a little bit of the article. This isn't the Monday reading. It could have been though. Uh, according to TikTok where the trend has more than 30 million views, girl dinner is akin to an aesthetically pleasing lunchable

and artfully arranged pile of snacks that when consumed in high enough volume constitutes a meal or so the thinking goes. So it was basically came, like, they set the scene. It's 90 degrees outside. You come home from a long day of work. You grab a popcorn, bag of popcorn, a glass of wine, some bread, some cheese, a hunk of chocolate, settle into the couch for a night of snacking

and watching TV. Is there anything more glorious? Welcome to Girl Dinner. So it's just been eating. I've been eating Girl Dinner for the last 20 years in my life. There's nothing I like better than doing in an all-apps dinner. Just all appetizers, all-finger food, maybe even all dips, like five different types of dips.

Dude, it sounds like a snack. A snack is girls, didn't it? No, no, it's different. No, no, it's a lot snack. Girl dinner is bollop corn and chocolate. Hank, Hank, and one, Hank. Typical girl dinners may include some kind of fruit a block of cheddar slice salami a sleeve of fancy crackers in addition to all of those girl dinner is both chaotic and filling wait I've been eating girl dinner forever. I just yeah, I accidentally eat a full sleeve of crackers in a block of cheese while I'm standing in front of my fridge That's girl dinner is best. And then this woman who's Works in LA said I think the concept of girl dinner came to me while I was on a hot girl walk with another female friend of mine.

The concept of eating It's hot girl walk Hot girl walk Yeah, it's Hawker walk. Yeah, but no, it's Hawker walk. What did I say? Hawker walk. Are they Haw, are they Haw girls or is it Hawker? Haw girls. No, no, it's the walk.

The walk is a Hawker walk. Yeah. She said, yeah, it describes the walk. It doesn't describe the girl. A guy can do a Hawker walk. So here's the last thing I'll read from it. She said, she and her friend have been discussing the unmatched perfection of bread and cheese

as a meal unto itself, as simple as it is satisfying. We love eating that way. And it feels like such a girl dinner because when we do it, when our boyfriends aren't around and we don't have to have what's a typical dinner. It's a house. It's just eating. It sounds kind of like the plot of yellow jacket,

honestly. That's the real girl dinner. It's girl dinner, maybe. This is my dinner. It's chaotic and filling. So, yeah, girl dinner. Eating is back all the way back. I like how girl dinners. Also, all the Northwestern alums are back

for speaking out against hazing. Also, I like how girl dinners also all the Northwestern alums are back for Speaking out against Hazing oh wait. No, that's right. They all went silent Which I don't actually care, but it is funny because they are the loudest people in the world I don't think greenie a greenie was in Japan. So I think he gets to be like I was on a flight for two weeks Time zones. Yeah, yeah, I just, and I can't find a skull. Just call those for skip. Yeah, I can't find a skull. Nobody wants a word for skip?

Yeah. Yeah, the Northwestern thing though, it's weird, I don't really understand. I guess there'll be more facts that come out. But the part I was just interested is, let me hear all the Northwestern alums that are down our ass when they win four football games. Billy, Billy's got to take. He's been growing on it. No, dudes, you don't play in transfer are the biggest snitches ever. Oh, Billy.

I mean, like, because they're they're the only ones who like, there's something wrong with this program. It's not wrong with me. It's the program that's wrong. And they're like, in like, they don't buy in. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. No, but like're like in like They don't buy in yeah Exactly no, but like in it. They don't buy into getting humped I Mean if you think of a dog if you think of a football pile There's probably more More intimate then then who has a We actually do it we do it every Wednesday, on part of my take.

Football team in the brotherhood. It is always like, what happens in a football locker room would shock everyone in the world probably all the time. Yeah, I was just saying that. I was just saying that. Like, there's some parts that aren't funny. There's some parts that are funny.

My father, the funniest is the fact that they're gonna have to have a locker room monitor that is not affiliated with a football team at all. whose job it is to just stand in the locker room and observe what's going on and then report back to the universe. Make sure there's no hunting. That's, they're going, they're going to end up humping that guy. Yeah. Yeah, like there's got to be a million like Northwestern,

I guess I'm not gonna say it. It's a tricky one. It's a tricky one Way worse like there there's no doubt in my mind that there's other programs that like if whatever I just I just know This is and this is just from a personal perspective Every time that Northwestern beats Wisconsin. I hear about it constantly and then I hear crickets now. So where are those guys? I think they're gonna have to fire for sure. Unfortunately. Yeah. The soap slips the soap slip-in slide in the showers is just a classic across the country. If that is wrong, then I don't like the naked

barricroll. Mm-hmm. Fucking just guys being dude. That's a hot boy walk. Yeah. A boy walk. Then we get guy dinner. We go with the alignment and we get 5,000 calories. We call it guy dinner. Let them need to talk. They're going to introduce this locker remaneter.

They're going to bring in no fence, Jake. But like somebody like Jake, they're going to bring Jake in the locker room. No, it's going to be a reveal. It's going to be like, I'll fix this. I will be the locker reminder. Yeah, Jake is gonna be the locker reminder. No, that's. She's doing it dude to watch naked dudes.

Yeah, that's their job and make sure that there's no naked digin' going on in the locker room. Yeah. All right, Pilly, you're who's back. I can't believe this dropped so far, but UFC. Awesome. Awesome card last night. Probably one of the highlights was Israel, Adesonia going to confront Drikus Duplessis. I hope I pronounced that right.

In the cage after he won. That was awkward. It was. What do you say? What did he say, Billy? He, I can't say it. Why not? Because I actually didn't see this. Oh, what did he say Billy? He I can't say it. Why not? Because I actually didn't see this.

Oh, it sounds like Billy might not have gotten the fight. You can get it. He didn't watch. I didn't get the fight. I didn't get the fight. So he's really headlines against you. And he'll prove to us that you watched. Tell us what he said.

I honestly don't know. He said, what's up? My brother. Oh, okay. He said that. And then he said, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep. And then Treka said, I'm not your brother. Oh, okay. He said that. And then he said, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep. And then Tric has said, uh, I'm not your brother. Your brothers are in New Zealand. And it was just a whole thing. Okay. Basically, dupluses. That's so bad. Dupluses is saying he's the only

African champion in the UFC. And it's from South Africa. Yeah, and he's like playing off some like old like 1990s South Africa stuff. But what's funny is, let's call the parts of it. Yeah, he's got a little dude to do in South Africa. But I'm really just fucking yada yada yada in the corner. But what's crazy is that there's actually a bigger rivalry between South Africa and Nigeria when it comes like sports world cup and everything. So there's a lot of even black South Africans rooting for Treqis against Otasania because he's originally Nigerian. Treqis is just an awesome name for a fighter. He's an and Bonychal was incredible.

He's so awesome. He showed people he could box. Yeah, it was a great card. It was a great fucking card. And oh, also, there's another thing, Otisanya, another part of it is like there's video of Otisanya when he was kickboxing in China, saying that he was really Chinese and that he's not actually African. He's Chinese. So like, that might be another element to the whole thing. Okay. so it's gonna be a great fight. He's gonna 26 and me. Yeah Yeah, that was another part. Yeah, this is a battle of who's more African. Yeah, is what I'm hearing and Billy is the judge Yes, Billy will be Judging I'm just bringing it up. He will be ringside

scoring the scoring the fight Okay, is that you have any other who's backs? Tom Brady. Oh, yeah,. Oh yeah. Yeah. Hedges Lee involved with a Kardashian after your boy's white party. Yeah. What about the report that came out today, Billy? If you're gonna bring up news, you got to stay up on the date. Look, this was at the end of my list after Britney Spears and stuff. So who had the report today? The was report today that he was seen

at a party talking to multiple women. Who had the report? I don't page probably New York Times. Oh, I was hoping it was Floreal. And then you had to use that. So I don't page probably New York times. Oh, I was hoping it was Florio and then you had to you know, no, no, that white party. Yeah, we we will still sneak in at some point. We were there. I was there. Yeah, they never caught me. USA just scored. We're gonna be kids. Yeah, yeah, suck a. Fuck you. That's for those wildfires, bitch.

Yeah, let's go. I feel like we definitely could do an amphibious assault on the white party. We just came from the sea. Why don't we just go from the sea? There's probably no security on the sea. So Hank, why would you not be excited about Tom Brady dating Kim Kardashian?

Is that a real question? Yeah. Yeah, why wouldn't you? She's hot. She drove Kanye crazy. She can't, you know, can she? She made Kanye crazy. Dr. Fiction, he went crazy after he married there. She's, she's Ava Braun you're saying?

I just thought it was always a little bit crazy. That's easy to say in hindsight. I feel like you would have been my love Kanye before before Kim K. Let me ask you a question. Hank if I'm free as a relationship Chris Humphries disaster. Okay. Every one of the reasons she been a knock rate because she's she's for cloud. She's all about cloud. Tom Brady's a real man. He cares about you, brotherhood, love. Yep. Why do you guys not play anymore? Yeah, but also, Hank, what if Tom Brady said, Kim Kardashian's a love of my life

and I just wanna be happy? Will you not let him be happy? If he said that, he can do whatever he wants, but I'm not gonna let the internet and Billy Fowl just, you know, report on fake rumors. Kinda sounds like you're being a cockblock right now. you know I just know I just let all the facts come out Ah that party looks insane though. He wants to get down with the thickness Yes, what hey dude jazel jazel was like a little cake. That was worse

And that was all natural Jizelle is like he's all natural. Jizelle is like. I choose. It's a two by four compared to the crowd. I see a time out, Billy saying he just wants to get down with the thicknesses way worse than you calling every golf course a track. Just want to update the log there.

Okay, I mean, I think they're actually both good phrases. I like that one the thickness. I'm down the thicknesses is fun. It sounds like you're not down. Sounds like your body shaming, can you imagine a little bit? Meaming. Kim Kardashian a little bit. Me? She's got a fake body.

And Tom Brady would never do something like that. So like I don't, I just take you to something like what? Have sex with a full 500 female? No, he's Tom Brady's all natural himself. He's all about, you know. Sometimes, yeah, yeah, that's right. She may be too inflated for him. Oh, you got that. What's this? What's the better? What's the better cut? What's the

better come back? 28 to three are the Rage A tape. Yeah, exactly. See, that's what's what's Kim's PSI's on a rass? I don't know, it's too much. Um, the ideal gas lover. You would never say you would never go for something that inflated, yeah? No, I just think like that that report came out of like a week and a half ago. The one that came out today was he was at a party talking to multiple women. Okay, but so he put on the super word. Tom Brady talks to people at party.

Yeah, okay. And also Hank just on like a page. Superb. Superb. Tom Brady talks to people at party. Yeah. Okay. And also Hank, just on like a baseball page six, Brady was also spotted at engaging in conversations with various women at the party. I think he was talking to men too. That's a bigger story. I don't see any of those reports. But Hank, on a basic level, like you and Tom Brady are bros, right?

Like you guys are boys. And he comes back after night. He's like, yo yo I just met this chick I think I'm gonna smash she's so hot and you're like no bro that don't do that don't know I would be like Tom do you get some fucking pizza with the boys and let's fire up the Xbox that's what you're doing your cock no no no no I'm in I'm in math class and I got Jimmy John's that next to me being like to do here Tom Brady's banging Kim and I'm like, dude, you're making that up, bro, don't slam in my bro like that.

I'm just defending. Why is that slander? Cancel. Penelty. Oh, no. We have a USA Penelty coming for Canada. This is bullshit. Damn.

What do you like about Kim Kardashian, P.F.D.? She's extremely attractive. No, but do you think those are... What do you think she's like a favorite part of? Not to be Neltinaic. She's a business bow go. She's a lawyer, Hank. She went to law school.

She has a very successful line of cosmetics. And she's got an ass that won't quit. Her dad was a lawyer I got a you know it's crazy like do you think Kim Kardashian Tom Brady were both like the two head honchos Walking to that party like Tom braze the alpha The Alphanage who else's higher rank Drake Drake. I do not think Drake is high Sure, Jersey wasn't there. He was there right memes. Yeah Drake was there, but I don not think Drake is high. I think Drake was there. Are you sure? Drizzy wasn't there? He was there, right memes?

Yeah, Drake was there. But I don't think Drake, Tom Brady Drake to women. Hey, tell us, Tom Brady or Drake. I mean, you could ask me anything and it's Tom Brady. Okay, all right. But literally anyone. Do you not think Drake would be like at a party?

Fuck, Tom Brady would be cooler funny or probably sing better Okay, no more than Kim K though Alex Earl Rihanna Livy done Beyonce that that orb in last but all of them Everyone you said is Kim K like the heck it's weird that you have like a big thing against one of your best bros Bang in Kim card. That's what I'm saying. He's a cockpull. That's weird. I think you're jealous. There this is fan fiction So used would you have just creating? Obviously, oh

Brady I don't know. So the standards that he holds. Yeah, you're like, yo, dude, you would never you like you shouldn't go for her. And then you're you're like, yeah, I'll meet you in a second. We'll play some more zone. You're in the bathroom texting Kim K be in like, yo, like I'm the one. She's a great. If if if if Tom Brady comes up publicly, I will, I will take everything I just said back and I'll be the biggest Kim K fan in the world.

I love it. Tom Brady's gonna end up like Lamar Odom, but like in Amsterdam, just like a nicer venue. I mean, yeah, she is the, she is the me. That's where you get scared of. Wait, wasn't she, wasn't that Chloe? Yeah, but like, same courage. Yeah, she is, yeah.

So now like, the car she curses real. He's dating, what, OJ Simpson's daughter-in-law? Yeah. How's daughter-in-law. Yeah. Half-daughter? No, Chloe. No, Chloe. Yeah, but so that would make Kim OJ's half-daughter. No.

No. No. No. That's not how it works. It's not half-daughter. It's not how it works. She's the step sister to the real killer. OJ's up. killer. Oh, Jason.

Yeah, there you got it. All right. I don't know how we got Jake. You're up. Yeah, I don't know how to follow that conversation. We haven't talked for a while. The guys had to do some lies. I didn't miss that, Billy.

I don't know what like, come on. Who's back? That was a meandering 20 minutes. I started with Northwestern and ended with Hank fucking Kim Kardashian. It is really weird though that Hank is totally against Tom Brady. It's dude being with Kim. He's being a real fucking like dog. He's being a vibe killer.

Dog is as rumors. I'm definitely when we get to the room. If you guys had had you guys had rumors where like I would defend you too No, Tom breeze a stay-home dad He needs to find another sugar mama to pay his bills because he always likes women who make more than him That's just the facts That's he needs a woman with money. That's the facts

You can't do something there. There could be something there again. I'm like talking to whatever he wants But until I hear from him. I'm not gonna be husband. He's a trophy. I'll decide you know What's best for him? He got dumped by his ex-wife who need a better trophy husband now. He's looking for someone to take care of All right, Jake you're who's back My who's back is the NBA cup. It was revealed. Yes. This weekend, everyone, I think a lot of people don't like it.

I think it's awesome. I think it's a professional version of like the Maui invitation, a batter full of lannis. I don't think anything's wrong with it. Okay, so I actually agree with you, Jake. Yeah. I know you think that I only shit on things

just to be cool. That's not the fact here. I in here's why. There's one reason why I like it. I looked at the schedule. The final four is December 9th. What is December 9th? That's Army Navy Day.

That is the day that you're like, oh fuck, college football is over. So scheduling wise I'm in. I will watch this. I will like it. Like December 9th, I don't think people are circling NBA on their calendar, but now this gives you a reason to do so. Yes, exactly.

There is that feeling that you get after Armie Navies over where there should be more sports on that day. Right, exactly. There's a high spin is on. Right, yeah, there's never any good sports on after that. I think it's gonna be great. I hope that some real shitty team wins it so that they can just hang up a banner

that sounds like NBA, too. If the bulls win this, I will make the gonna be great. I hope that some real shitty team wins it so that they can just hang up a banner that sounds like NBA. Yeah. If the balls win this, I will make the best shirt ever. So basically for people who don't who haven't been connected or read up on it, it's basically a World Cup version of NBA. Yeah. It's like six groups, five teams each,

and there's knockout stages, and then the finally team's playing Vegas. It's a whole thing. They did a good job of weaving it into the regular season, so you won't even notice it until that December 9th day. And then you'll be like, oh, this is kind of fun. And also, I think the players each get like 599. 1 team, 500 KU each.

Each. So that's a big, even a millionaires. That's a big deal. Well, and the games are in Vegas. So it's like, we're going to get great content out of the winning team just blowing all that money that night Yeah, so I'm excited. Yeah, okay. Good. Who's back? Also Ellie Dela Cruz. Yes home

still all three bases in the same inning and in in two pitches It's wild. It's crazy so much fun to watch Max is underneath the desk right now trying to plug in the computer We might might lose you guys, but let's get to our interview. We have an awesome interview with Sam, we're plugged in. We're plugged in. Awesome interview with Sam, and it is brought to you by our friends at BetterHelp.

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HLP.com slash PMT today. Betterhelp.com slash PMT for 10% off your first month and go make sure that you're taking care of yourself with betterhelp.com Betterhelp HLP.com slash PMT. Okay. Here is Sam darn Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is 49ers quarterback Sam darn old former jets former panther quarterback former USC quarterback Let's start here though because you are 49er now. How does that feel?

Are you, like, you went to OTAs? Yes, I did. You're with Kyle Shanahan. How's it gone so far? It's great. Man, first of all, thanks for having me. This is awesome. Been a fan of the show for a while,

and this is a very formal setting. Yeah, yeah. It's like good. Yeah. This is how ES's like good. Yeah. This is how ESPN does it. Exactly. No, but it's great, man. It's nice to be on the West Coast again.

I can't lie. Buy my family. It's like a 45-minute flight down to Orange County. So that's really nice for my parents to be able to come on up for games super easily. And then obviously the organization, man. That's this past year is my first time hitting free agency.

So kind of the first time I had a choice really, and to be able to just see what, you know, their organization's like, that offense is like, and just the culture that's set in that locker room by just great dudes. And guys that, you know, obviously, it's a profession, it's a business and they take it very, very serious, but at the same time, like, I feel like they do a great job

of kind of having fun, but also mixing that with being able to lock in on the field and do your work when you need to do it. So yeah, we were just out at your teammate, George Kittles barn. We were working out with him. Didn't interview with him. And he told us that you guys have become, you know, he pretty close. You lived at his pool house right during OTAs.

But then you moved out and he was he was wondering why you moved out. Yeah. Um, well, I got my spot. Uh-huh. Okay. Yeah. Is there anything else? No. And the other reason why you moved out. Yeah, well, I got my spot. Uh-huh. Yeah. Is there anything else? No.

And the other reason why you moved out? No. That he would have told us maybe? No. To ask you about. You didn't think it was haunted? Oh, the pool house? Yeah.

Oh, yeah. There was something going on. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's a good point. I was going to move out. I moved out because I already spent a week there, but that didn't help. You know, we have to follow just move that out. I moved that out because I already spent a week there, but that didn't help. You know, we have to follow that up.

Yeah, yeah. Do us all go. I think you actually do see ghosts. Like I think it's like a real thing. Like legitimately. Yeah. Legitimately. No.

It was crazy though, man. I had never had anything like that happen to me before. I'm talking about, I mean, I guess both, you know, the New England game and at George's house, no. But it was just, it was crazy, man. Like, I woke up and, you know how sometimes you have a dream and then you wake up and you feel like you can't move. Feel like maybe four or five seconds, whatever it is.

And, you know, I felt that and I woke up, it was like 3 a.m. I went to go take a pee and, you know, came back, fell right asleep and then that next night, you know, the night after that, the same thing happened. And I like, I just like couldn't, like, I had to like keep focusing on this thing and the, like, there was something else. The hat man. Like, in the room. Was it a dude wearing a hat?

No. Oh, really was telling us about the hat man. No. Was George, George didn't tell you guys about this? No. No, I'm kidding. It might have been him. Yeah, just watching.

Exactly. Yeah, he was just watching me. No, that's not possible. Dude, it was very creepy. And I had never dealt with anything like that before. And I like know a couple people who have had situations where there have been, whether it was old civil war place, where now there's a hotel or a dorm.

And people have certain experiences with that. But it was just super, super weird. And it just felt like when I woke up, there was something like holding onto me. Yeah. And then that next night, I felt that something was in the room with me. And it was the freakyest thing I'm like

getting chills talking about it right now, but that's never happened to me before. And I've sure it sucks for you because you can't be like, tell the media I saw a ghost. Yeah, no, I didn't see him. I didn't, I just felt it. He felt it, yeah, he felt it. He felt it.

Yeah, I felt it. So, no, but that was, I mean, yeah. I'm glad George told you about that. Yeah, that's not an excuse. Yeah, I won't even go. So I'm with you. I'm on your side. You had ghost hunting in Milwaukee a few years ago. If you don't believe in ghosts

I don't believe in you as a person. Really? Yeah, it goes to real. How could you say ghosts aren't real? Yeah, I mean if you believe in angels, right? You believe in all that stuff. Little children if they die they become a ghost Someone who's been wronged. They're a ghost. Yeah, that's just it. That's a fact. Yeah, it's just sometimes they feel like making their presence felt and sometimes they don't Right more than I think about them more than I think it probably was just George. Just like put on one of his luchador masks. Yeah. Go substance next to you watches. But it's got to be cool playing in that new office. And as a free agent, you chose to go to San Francisco, right? Like, this seemed like a place that might be a good fit, a good place for you to start, you know, getting back out there and see what you can do. We always say like, imagine any quarterback

in College A&A system, because it seems like it's a very quarterback-friendly scheme. And you, I guess you're a gunslinger, right? Would you consider yourself a gunslinger? I mean, I play quarterback, yeah. Yeah, you're a gunslinger. You're a gunslinger, for sure. I'll let you guys call me whatever, yeah.

So what is it, because we know ball. we watch the All-Tweety 2, we study, we break down all the film. But from your perspective, it's a great way. You guys break down. Yes. Yeah, I'm a film rat. Yeah, big time. So when you're looking at different offices,

and you see the kind of office they run San Francisco, what is it about that that made you say, I want to be a part of this? Guys are open. I mean, there's a lot of guys open on being near every play. It just seems like there's a ton of answers. Great run game. I mean whenever you can have a great run game as a quarterback that's always a comforting feeling. And yeah I think think, you know, just with the certain weapons that they have, you know, Dibo, Aiyuk, George, obviously Christian, Juice, John Jennings, like there's so many guys you can go on and on, but they've been there for so long.

And Kyle's been able to understand kind of what everyone does well, what they don't do well. And I feel like every game plan he, you know, uses and gets the most out of his guys. And that's a very good feeling as a quarterback knowing that, you know, the coordinator is going to put everyone in the best position possible. Do you think Kyle has hyperdrive in him? What is that? Adam Gase, when he was like, we're going to go into hyperdrive, remember that? Yeah when he was like, we're gonna go into HyperDrive, remember that? Yeah, he was like, our offense about to go into HyperDrive.

Did he say that? Yeah, he said that. Okay, yeah. That was probably one of the two years I was with him that I wasn't really paying attention to the media very often. Yeah, smartly. I was with him for two years. Yeah, well HyperDrive can last for a very long time. You should see a doctor if it goes for more than a few weeks.

Okay. Hyperdrive was kind of like Viagra. Yeah. Sometimes hyperdrive is like over in like six seconds too. Yeah. And it's great. Well, last, but then everyone else is on Saturday. Yeah.

Okay. So we mentioned, I think that makes a lot of sense. Yeah. You mentioned the media billy is a Jets fan. He wrote a report that basically Jets fans, Jets quarterback struggle because of the New York media So do you do you feel like his report is founded in fact at all? You're saying the Jets struggle because of the New York Yeah, the media basically takes them down. No, okay, no

I don't really just wasted all that time for now. No, I mean, I think you could have a case for it, for sure. Personally, living through it, I don't think so. Yeah. I think there's a lot of different situations where maybe they make something bigger than it is. And now, whether you have a great, you know, an organization that allows that to kind of creep into the locker room or not, you know, that's a different story. But I think it's about, you know, having that culture where that won't happen. And having a quarterback with a good head on his

shoulders, that is just going to continue to play after play and game after game because at the end of the day like it's hard to win in the NFL And if you make the biggest thing out of every single loss It's it's gonna be hard to have success that way. Did you ever get an apology for the scene goes clips? Cuz you got you got you got you got fucked Yes, yeah, they did you got you got done dirt big time. No, you know how many clicks they got for that? Yeah, but that's the thing. It's like they could take something from every single game. If they're doing my show. Oh, sure.

Yeah, right. And they could choose to paint somebody in whatever light they want to after a game. Well, all the stuff that goes on in between plays, they can find a clip, put it out there. But for whatever reason, they just chose you. And they're like, okay, we'll put this out for him. Yeah, I mean, you know, it is what it is, man.

Like, it's just. They screwed you. They also'll put this out for him. Yeah, I mean, you know, it is what it is, man. Like, it's just... They screwed you. They also screwed you with the monographic. Yeah. That was kind of funny. That was very funny. But it was like, they basically were like, I was mean for the internet. I was like, the sickest I've ever been.

Like, on my deathbed, it felt like, obviously I wasn't. But I was laying in bed watching the game and that comes up. Ding, ding, ding, ding. Like, all my phone just blew up. All my friends just, like, obviously, it wasn't. But I was laying in bed watching the game, and that comes up. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. All my phone just blew up. All my friends just, like, all caps, ha ha ha, crying, laughing face, like, and then of course, like, I'm sick, so I'm kind of laughing,

but I'm also like, this is just stupid. This is, and then another thing to maybe his point, just another thing that I had to deal with in the media, you know, but no, I thought it was more, especially after a couple of days went by, I thought it was more funny. Okay, you know, you know, you know, that's a good attitude.

Mono nucleosis. Yeah, and now it's like that. You probably were like, man, like in training camp when they made me point to the camera, I never thought it would be for Mono nucleosis. Yeah, they're gonna stounce. Yeah, I remember actually doing that. It was like that.

We do it today. We do it today. Yeah, there we go. And then that's gonna be a meme now, which is great. No, but I just, I remember when I did that stupid thing, whatever it was, OTAs or training camp, I was like, I was like, this is gonna be used. Whatever reason this is gonna be used for whatever reason this is gonna be used for,

it's not gonna be like no good is gonna come out of this for me. And then it was the worst case scenario. And so from that moment on, I think I've done a lot better job of in those media days, just being like, hey, like, I'm gonna pass on that. I'm not gonna point. Yeah. Like, hey, give me your touchdown celebration. I'm like, I'm good. Yeah, I'm just, I'll just say you guys can take a headshot touchdown celebration. I'm like, I'm good. Yeah. I'll just say you guys can take a head shot at me and then I'll, I'm proud. Thanks. Yeah, you need to be like,

touchdown celebration just hand me a clipboard. I'm back to the X play. Literally just. Yeah. That could happen to anybody too. Like anytime you use a water fountain, you can get mono. Have you done like a mono awareness campaign?

Well, the toughest thing I know, you know, she, my mom was the one who was kind, who brought it up and like, you know, you could have got it anyway, right? You could have got it from sharing a bottle with one of your teammates on accident. And it's such a bomb thing to say. But it's like, I was like,

I was like, you don't even have to bring this up. But I think for her, it was more just like, you know, a couple of minutes went by and not talking in the car. My mom can talk so it was like, she had to say something and that was gonna be it. Yeah. And so she brought it up and I was like, yeah,

you know, it could have been anything but it also sucks because mono is like a real thing that like you said, you were really, really sick. Oh yeah. But everyone just said, it is like the high school kissing disease. So it's like a joke, but it's not. Well, I had to, yeah, 100%.

Like I shouldn't have got it at 22. Yeah, for sure. But yeah, like I had to keep on weight however I could. Like I was dropping LBs like crazy. I need an LB. Fuck, I want a kissbees like crazy. I need a model. I'm gonna kiss after this. Yeah, I mean, I don't think that's how it works, but sure. No, but it sucked. I mean, I was dropping a ton of weight and they're like,

you literally just, the doctors are like, you gotta keep on weight however you can. So I was eating burgers, fried, like I was eating five guys a ton because nothing really sounded good. Right. I was drinking a ton of milkshakes, not milkshakes, protein shakes, and maybe milkshakes. Yeah. From five guys. But yeah, no, it was just brutal. Because it was like, I was, you know, I ended up keeping my weight on. I was like, 222.25, but it was just not good. Right. And then I came back that season and I just didn't feel great the rest of the year and it was just

kind of brutal, honestly. How did you find out that you had it? Like for a while where you just like I'm tired. Well, I'm out of shape. Did you think that it was just like your body being out of shape? No, so it's actually crazy. So week one we played Buffalo in New York, and I wake up that Sunday.

And that's when I first felt sick, and played the game, played decent, didn't play great, but we had a chance to win, Josh ended up driving it down and beating us. But I just remember after the game sitting in my apartment like, dang, I don't feel right. And went in that next day on Monday and felt sick as a dog and thought maybe you know got some medicine did whatever I need to do with the doctors and went home that next day woke up Tuesday and I was just like something's wrong with me. So they were like, all right let's go

get your blood work done and just rule out mono. That's how they said it. Let's rule out mono. And sure enough, got it back and got the phone call from Gaze. Yeah. He's like, yeah, you're going to be out for a few weeks. And when you come back, hyper drive. But exactly. No, it was brutal. This is such a, it's so funny whenever we talk to athletes and the things we remember versus your job being like, what about hyper drive? And you're like, what are you talking about? Yeah, hyper drive, never.

Yeah. You just said it to the media. Yeah. I think this might be the first time I'm hearing about it. Maybe the second, obviously. So that was so hot that you weren't in hyper drive. Yeah. I wasn't.

He's a prepares team for hyper drive. Yeah. I mean, I remember't. He prepares team for hyper drive. Yeah. I mean, I remember, you know, having a conversation about, you know, Going more to our basic stuff and going a little bit more high tempo. Maybe that's what he meant by that, but yeah He needs to clearly say hyper drive activated. There's a button that every coach has. Yeah, and he pushed it You didn't know. Yeah, exactly. Do you think you got your swagger back a little bit because I do I? I'm I think it was somewhere around 14, 15 last year where I was like, I'm believing in Sam Darnold.

I said that on the show. I was like, I think I'm ready. Let's go. Yeah. I mean, I think for sure, being in Carolina, I think just getting away from New York and going into Carolina, having honestly, 2021, two years ago, I had a good start to the season, and then middle hit a little, you know, hit a little,

but I felt, you know, just that first little start to Carolina, that 2021 season, I felt really good, and then got hurt and some things happened, and the whole season kind of fell apart, but, and then, you know, I was, I was ready to go. I really liked we hired Maca-do at the end of 2021. Yeah. And I was really pumped up about being in his system

because it was West Coast-ish. And I hadn't really been in a West Coast system since my rookie year. And so I was just really excited to learn his system. And once I got it in OTAs and we kind of ran it, I was really pumped. You know, we were doing a lot of on the ball stuff, kind of what Eli was doing when Makadu was the OC, I think,

in New York when they had a couple of good years with OBJ making the one-handed catch and stuff. That was MACIDU call and plays and they were going no huddle. So I was excited about that. But yeah, so I was excited and then Baker gets traded there and you know I end up hurt my ankle, great the ankle sprain. the last preseason game against Buffalo. Josh is really bad luck actually. I just know that's happened to me. No, but so hurt my ankle and then I couldn't do anything for like eight weeks and then came

back later in the season and felt good man. I felt really good running that system and kind of like I said in the beginning, we had a really good run game. And I felt like that really helped. And you guys were winning games too. We were winning games, and Tampa wasn't doing very well, so we had a chance at the end. I think we were up 24 to 10 going in the fourth quarter against Tampa.

And if we beat them, and then Beat New Orleans week 18, we would have gone to the playoffs. Right. It was my guess. It was crazy and I probably would still be in Carolina if that happened. And then sure enough, Mike and Tom go off in the fourth quarter and, you know, that's kind of it for our season. Yeah, about Mac and do, does he, does he maintain the same look all year round or does he come

in here slick back occasionally? So he never like fully slicked it back. He never had the pomade in. Yeah. But he would like, he would work out every morning, dude was jacked. And he's got really short arms and short legs. So he would deadlift a ton and bench press a ton

at like 5.30 in the morning, every morning. And he would come in some days and his back would hurt. I'm like, oh, Coach, I wonder where, you know, why your back's hurting? No idea, man. Because he probably been deadlifting four times a week. Yeah, he's getting a great full moon active on his body.

Yeah, it's like 400 pounds, you know. Jesus. But, no, he's a beast. So, he would come in and he would, he would have just showered. So it would be slick back sometimes, but he didn't put anything in it. So it would just fall apart by the but he didn't put anything in it.

So it would just fall apart by the halfway through the meeting, but no, McAdusa stud man, he's a good dude. Yeah, he wears his dad suits, which was cool. Yeah, does he? Well, his press conference when he was the Giants head coach, he was wearing a suit that was like five times too big, and it was just a very funny visual. Yeah, no, getting a know another guy over this past year,

he's not a suit guy. Yeah, not a suit guy, right. There's some football guys, it's like, whatever you want to do, like, you put him in a suit, they're gonna look weird. Yeah, 100%. He's definitely that. What about other football coach, Greg Williams?

Yeah. Is he zero blitzing you in practice all the time? Yeah, you know, he would go off script a couple times. You know, because him and Gase, you know, would go at it, you know, in training camp, just trying to, you know, mix it up on each other, because obviously Gase being the head coach, he would kind of, you know, script some things during practice to get the right look and get, you know, get it dialed in. And so whenever

Gase would highlight whatever, you know, run cover three or cover two here, and sometimes Greg would just, you know, kind of fuck with them every now and then and yeah, you know, go cover zero on the play where we wanted to get a good play action fake over the top and get a nice little high low read on a backer and he would bring zero. He's like, dude, in the game, it's like, you know, second and six and we're going to run the play action, try to go over the top. Like, you're not going to run, cover zero. That's Dr. Geetwood. He probably would. Yeah. Yeah, he did it. Yeah.

Last play of the season or last play the game against the Raiders, which wasn't great. No, that was not great. That's Dr. Heet. That's what he does. That's what he does, man. Yeah, take the good with the bad with him. He's always going to be he.

100%. Yeah, that's true. I like to play a fun game called games that I gambled on and lost but it was actually worse for you The USC Ohio State bowl game taking away back. Yeah, you got sucked eight times in that game I did bet on USC. How much of that suck for you? It's suck for me, but how much is suck for you? Yeah, how much did you put on that? I was a good amount. It was a good amount, a couple grand, and USC was not.

A couple grand. Yeah, and it wasn't fun. I really believe in you guys. Yeah, a couple grand, I mean shoot, I was probably worse for you, it sounds like. Okay, and yeah, I'm not gay time. I'm getting sacked by Nick and, you know, some of those beasts that were up front at Haas,

of Haas State, I don't know, but, a couple house of a state I don't know but a couple grand man. Yeah it hurt. It hurt all along and I was actually at my buddy's house and he had he just switched to streaming so it was like it was early streaming so it wasn't like it was always just a little bit behind and so it would be like the TV would freeze and then you just be sacked again. Yeah. I was just like what the fuck is happening. I'm just on the ground. Yeah, I'm like out of that outfit. That's great. Yeah That was one of those games that like you could just tell right away like they can't block and Do you when you when you're in that game and you know that you're just like this gonna get the ball out? Yeah, yeah That's when the gun's like that's when you just gotta you know take your one-on-one match up and and

Give him a chance. Yeah, yeah, but it was, you did have a great career at USC. Was it, I mean, dumb question. How sick was it to be a star quarterback for USC? It was fun, man. Yeah. It was fun. Yeah, just being able to, you know, I think the best thing, and a lot of people don't maybe don't realize this.

Like, USC's not in a great area. It's in South Central LA. So we have our one bar that we would go to, but everything else is we would go to frat houses, we would go to people's, whatever it was, just a house. We would throw house parties, but we weren't like out in LA, we weren't in downtown or hitting up any of the clubs in Hollywood, so that was really fun

because it was a real college experience. And to, you know, be good at the same time and be winning ball games, this pretty fun. It was, it's like the top, like when you think of like what would you want to be if you could pick like any position, any school, it's like star quarterback, you know what I say? I feel like this is something you guys have probably talked about.

I think you're up there. Like that's gotta be. Kentucky Derby winning horse would be pretty good. Yeah, future prospects are pretty easy at that point. Like a sick point card at UNC maybe. That was good. Yeah. But yeah, USC started quite, is there like a group chat that you're on?

No, no, but I am like pretty close with with most of guys most of the recent quarterbacks. Yeah So and can't wait pretty damn good. Who's that Caleb? Yeah, he's a beast man. He's really good. Yeah Yeah, are you worried though? USC having to play in the big 10 you guys kind of play a pussy brand of football that would be sure You haven't been to Piscata way on a Friday night You guys kind of play a pussy brand of football? That would be sure. You ever been to Piscataway on a Friday night? Yeah, you want to go to play in West Lafayette? I was actually thinking about like, yeah, it's got a suck for a football team, but I was thinking about basketball and women's volleyball,

like having to travel all those games. Yeah, that far for that, that many games, I feel like that would be tough. Yeah, I'm happy USC and UCLA are in the big 10, but it does kind of like, I liked watching Pac-12. Like, it was fun when USC plays airs. Was it fun? Did you even watch the Pac-12? Yeah, all the time.

Well, after going, I mean, you guys found a way to make it so that no one could watch the Pac-12. Whatever's name is Larry, whatever, the Pac-12 commissioner, just bad move after is Larry, whatever, the Pack 12 commissioner. Yeah. Just bad move after bad move, but I love Pack 12. Yeah, I mean, yeah, that was how I grew up watching USC, man. Yeah, you know, but were you originally recruited

to be a linebacker at USC? So I played linebacker and receiver in my sophomore year of high school. But that was, you know, we had a senior quarterback who had kind of been waiting his turn to play. And I wanted to play varsity football. So the only way to get on the field was to play receiver and linebacker.

So true football guy. Yeah, just a ball, love ball. No, but it was great, man. Just to have that experience, and then there were actually some seniors that were getting recruited, some offensive lineman that were getting recruited in Coach O's, O's Ron comes out there. He's got his old little camera out and like his flip camera, whatever it was.

And he's like recording the guys going through bags and stuff. And like this is literally just like blind size. Yeah. Like then him getting recruited and then all of a sudden like we started in line backer drills and we didn't have a line backer that would get recruited to USC at the time and he starts filming. I'm like the fuck is he doing? And then he just starts filming me as I'm going through the bags and I'm like what the heck

is going on dude. So that was a pretty crazy experience for him to, and then he came up to my coach afterwards. I didn't say or talk to him at all, but he went up to my coach and was like, hey, we think this kid has a chance, because I was a sophomore at the time, and he saw something. But yeah, that's crazy.

Yeah, that senior quarterback ended up getting hurt, broke his collarbone, like the third to last game. And so I ended up going in the last couple games, like two and a half games, and started my junior year, and started my senior year. That actually shows, like if you hadn't, if you hadn't been playing linebacker,

probably wouldn't have gotten that spot, right, at the end of the season, to get in a quarterback. Yeah, no, 100%. You want to play varsity ball? That's awesome. Yeah, I probably wouldn't play in JV or something. What have just been the backup and who knows if I would have been in good enough shape to run around and do some of the things

that I did at quarterback. Yeah, how far do you think you could throw football? Good question. That's a good question. I would say probably like 65, 70. Yeah. That's pretty decent. That's pretty good question. Thank you. I would say probably like 65-70. Yeah. That's pretty decent. That's pretty far.

Yeah. Yeah. We're about a vortex football. On a good day. How far do you throw? You know, there's vortex footballs. Like what's a big tail on them? Like the Nerf ones?

Yeah. Yeah. How far do you think you can throw one of those bad boys? Probably like 120 yards. Oh, man. 120. Yeah, I bet you could. Yeah. They got the tail. They spiral in the wind. It's the best toy ever. Yeah.

He just throw it up and it just keeps going. Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah. Um, I don't know probably. Yeah, probably a hundred twenty one yards or something like that. All right. Well, Josh, you're good friends with Josh are our best friend. Um, when he lets it rip. I was actually texting him before this and give you any advice. Yeah, he didn't tell me to say hi to you guys or anything Oh, that's probably because we probably we call him every morning, so he probably was like we already said hi Yeah, well you got new phone. Did you he got a new phone a while ago. Yeah, you I have that yeah It's Josh Allen knew in our phone. You know, sometimes I call the old one too. Just for fun for nostalgia You know like we have Josh Allen's phone number. Oh, are we doing it? No, no, I have no.

Oh, okay. Maybe he's like doing double-pick like me. The fuck? I have a serious job, Josh said hi. I have a serious question. If that's okay. It's okay. That's fine.

Your grandfather has the best name of all time. We've had the best name of all time. Respectfully. Yeah. Dick Hammer. Yeah. When did you first realize what an awesome name that was? Probably high school. Yeah.

sophomore junior year of high school. Yeah. I don't even, you know, I didn't even really put it together until then to be honest. Yeah. Yeah. Grampsy to me. Yeah. Yeah. Pretty epic name, you know, his story too. Yeah. Just crampsy to me. Yeah.

Yeah. Pretty epic name, you know, his story, too. And yeah, he was a legend, right? Yeah. One of the four original Marble Men. He was captain of a firefighting squad in LA. He went to the 1964 Olympics, played volleyball, played volleyball in basketball at USC as well.

He's like a true American hero. Yeah, man's man. Yeah, I didn't even know him too. He died in 99, so I don't even know if it's real. Yeah, you know, it's, no, it's very, I never heard the stories from him. Yeah, it's very real. And his name is Dick Hammer. I'm talking about all that.

What a pass. Unbelievable, unbelievable. That's gotta give real. And his name is Dick Hammer. I'm talking about all that. What a bad unbelievable. Unbelievable. That's gotta give you tons of street cred, Dick Hammer. Yeah. All right, last question, rowback question. This has been awesome. rhoback.com, use promo code TAKE.

20% off your first purchase, QZIPs, Polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, all of it, rowback.com. All right, so Sam, this has been awesome. You're here at Titan U. Are you the only quarterback here? No, okay. There's a few others. But you gotta be like,

everyone's gonna kind of love you around here because it's a bunch of Titans and you get to get them the Paul. Yeah, exactly, yeah. I guess it's a feed all of them for the next couple days. Are you learning stuff here too? Or like, how does it, are you just like, throw the ball, throw the ball?

Of course. Yeah, no, just to be able to hear these guys, because like, we spend so much time in the quarterback room, obviously, and with the offense, we're not usually, you know, with the tight ends, talking about technique, or how they're gonna separate in 101, or, you know, if it's zone, and you gotta, you know, a little, you know,

in cut, like, if they wanna throttle down or anything like that, so like, to be able to hear them kind of talk about football, that way is gonna be really cool for me, you know, inca, like if you, if they want to throttle down or anything like that. So like to be able to hear them kind of talk about football, that way is going to be really cool for me, you know, to be able to, to be able to hear that and hear, hear what they're thinking a little bit. What about getting you out running a few routes? I saw the, that Thursday night game. I remember how fast routes routes routes. Routes.

I remember I saw Sam's face. He's like, yeah, I remember how fast you are. You can say, I mean, you can say it however you want. You're a great root runner. Yeah, I love watching your roots. But yeah, I remember, you're, you know, you're sneaky fast. Yeah, I'm a, probably won't be running any routes. A route.

Yeah, definitely won't be running any routes. But no, probably not gonna run any routes. Just slated your back. I'm my, who knows? Your back. Are you back? I'm back. I'm back.

I'm back. I'm back. I think you're back. 100%. Yeah, yeah. I mean, if you guys want to say that, sure. No, I'm saying you're back. I'm not gonna be, I'm not gonna be a little headline.

Okay, okay. Sam Darnel's back. Put it, I said it. Big cat. I said it. How about this? Are you feeling the healthiest that you have in years? I feel really good. Yeah, I feel really good healthy. You ready to roll. Yeah. All right. That's a good headline right there. I always love that healthiest. I've felt in years. Yeah. Do you feel a little bit bad? You can get the ball faster against Ohio State? A little bit. Yeah. That one's not as bad as you.

All right Sam. Thanks so much. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. Sam Jongles brought to you by three 3G of all the things in life. One of the best has to be getting high wherever you want, whenever you want without the paranoia of consuming some sketchy black market bunk. I'm not a drug guy, but I am a 3G guy. 3G is the best way to get high. They have the highest quality cannabis products. You've heard of their Delta 9 Edibles, which are delicious, by the way.

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People just swarm like vultures, they take it away, they love 3chee, I love 3chee. You must be 21 or older purchase. Please, please use it responsibly. And now here is the Mount Rushmore of peas that you take. Mount Rushmore of Pisses. Okay, Mount Rushmore time, I am very excited for this Mount Rushmore. It's a good Mount Rushmore, there's a lot of meat on this bone. It is a good Mount Rushmore, we're gonna do the Mount Rushmore of best Pisses.

How many times do you think you've pissed in your life? Ooh. Like five a day. I'm like eight a day. Ten a day. It's a body armor water. Ten a day? I'm sorry, that's a call back to the beers

and I went that I meant I drank 10 beers a day. Yeah. I think just off the top of my head, I'd say 10 million peas. Yeah. I've probably pissed 10 million times. It's been a lot. It was actually for a lot of good stuff. Yeah, good've probably pissed 10 million times. It's been a lot. It was actually full of good,

yeah, good work. Yeah, good work. It was actually funny before we started this one long gets pissed in your life. Oh, we said we're gonna do the Mount Rushmore P's in the ink, I think for a second was like, you mean like green peas? Like the letter like a rock I P.

Yeah, I thought it was like things with the letter P. I have a crazy piss stat. Okay. Every single water molecule on earth has passed through a dinosaur's piss. Oh, that's true. That's right, it's like that stat where it's like,

you're, no, every time you take a piss you're pissing out Hitler's blood. Yeah, how's that possible, Billy? I just saw it. Okay, so it's not. So you've been googling. Yeah, you googled best pisses No, no, I want to know what videos those turned up No, I haven't been googling. I just remembered I just remember that staff

How's that possible? There was water because it was it's been millions of billions of years Where dinosaurs were like alive and they drank so much water during that time that it passed away drink all the water They at least at least passed through one dinosaur system. All the water on earth was drunk by at least one dinosaur. Yes. I don't that okay. It's insane. I saw it. Yeah. Yeah. Let me let me go pull it up. Let me go pull it up. That seems like one of those Neil deGrasse Tyson stats that he's just yeah. Do you know big part ocean of his brain? Yeah, they're not drinking saltwater, right I guess yeah, all right, okay

Yeah, Hank and Max yeah, he confirmed he for he googled the exact thing and it came up Hank and Max no, we're first Matt right billion Jake. Let's correct. All right, Billion Jake. That's correct, right? Billion Jake, yes. Billion Jake, Hank and Max, me and PFT. Okay, here we go. One, one. Billion, I agreed on this. It's rare. The drunk got the bar piss.

Okay, okay, all right. Good, good, good. Waiting in line, long line, crowded bar. You've had a couple beers. That graphics says drunk at the bar piss. Yeah, not waiting in line, piss. Yeah, oh. Yeah, graphics says drunk at the bar, piss. Yeah. Not waiting in line, piss. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, that's drunk at the bar, piss. That's drunk at the bar, piss. Being drunk at a bar and taking a piss. Yeah, I still feel confident in it. I'll say this. Not to denigrate. We're not denigrating. Go ahead.

We're not denigating, picks. But we didn't have that on our list. No way. No way. No way. You're lying. You're lying. No, we did not. We didn't have that on our list. No way, no way, no way. You're lying. You're lying. No, we did not.

We didn't have that on our list. We have 14 deep lists. We did not have that on our list. Learn how the ones voting. It's a good pick. It's a pick. It's a pick. I'm actually surprised.

We've had some bad picks. I didn't think this was. Yeah, it's a good one. It's a great one. It's a great one. Yeah. Okay. We are going to go with P piss after a long Uber ride.

Ooh, okay, that's a good one. So you're stuck in an Uber for a long time. You don't wanna have to pull over. You're trying not to throw up, trying not to piss. You think, you know, I can hold it. And then you're just basically sitting on a sitin' with your legs crossed for 20 minutes. It is good, you're wondering the whole time,

am I gonna make it? Because if you're in your friends car, you're just like pissing in a cop or pissing whatever you're pulling over. But if you're in an Uber, you just have to wait. Yes, yes. That's a good pick. Big kid, I think we go with number two on this list. I think we go one, too.

Okay. We have two picks. All right, you go one. All right, I'll go two. All right, our first pick is going to be after a movie piss. The best piss. You know you get that big soda. You don't go take a piss after getting out of a movie theater?

I'd be during movies. Yeah, I'd be during movies. I'd never be during movies. You know how big those sodas are? You're in your blood. You're blotting, you're spitting. Oh, that's crazy. No, because the best pisses are,

and I'm not gonna denigrate, but the best pisses are when you can't control the situation. Right, like leaving movies to miss the plot. Yeah, you can leave a movie. No when you can't control the situation and they're like, leave the movie to miss the plot. Yeah, you can leave a movie. No problem. That's crazy. How many times do you watch movies and you're looking at your phone and then you look back and you're like, oh shit.

That's the same. Like, you stop paying attention to the movie. I'm going to the movie theater. Yeah. And you don't think it's watching a movie. You're going to the movie. You're going to the movie theater and then when you drink your entire soda, have your popcorn, you walk out.

It feels great. It is a big deal. Okay, all right, yeah. That's crazy. That's not on our list. Okay. Okay. This one is this is.

This is. This one shouldn't have slept. Insane that you guys can take this already. Peeing in the snow. Pissing in a snow, writing your name in the snow. Watching it melt, you find a little piece of ice you know All the dogs do that only dogs do that. I've never done that. Okay. I grew up in Florida I grew up in Florida. I didn't know that

I think for him is such a great thing. So it was on our list It's even better when it's really cold and your piss looks like it's like yeah heating up Steam yeah, I actually used to commit graffiti around campus by peeing my name into snow banks And it got to the point where I got in trouble for it And I have multiple pictures of my name in actually I shouldn't say this how they know it was you I wrote my name Oh Okay, that sounds badass Just wasn't it you just writing the college's name? Well, it's so goddamn cold that it just stayed frozen got it

All right our second pick is going to be In your pants in a bathroom with Mark Schlerath. Okay. All right. Oh little panda pick great piss Pistons. Yeah, okay very fun very funny. Yeah, it's all time piss So this I Yeah, yeah, you very funny. Yes, all-time piss so this are Yeah, yeah You went hard on the panda on Okay, great all right to wrap up the second round we're gonna do the piss that passes the drug test Really that was a good pick Billy Why would you pick that?

Okay, good pick good pick We're gonna go with our yeah number three Really there just read it. I don't you guys want to read it He looked away from it when you pointed at Pissed during a long road trip, okay, okay, put it like like in the car or There's two different things like I'd a rest stop, okay, all right, okay? Like what do you guys want us to write on the graph? No, that's fine We're talking about our five yeah rest stop picks rest stop piss. That's fine. So the piss that arrest stop. Yeah.

Road trip, we'd like it road trip. Road trip rest stop piss. Yeah. We can do that. We can do that. The worst version of ours, but okay. Yeah. Not really.

Yeah, no, you guys are going to. You're not a long Uber. You're just a long car ride. No, but you stop. You take a break. Have you ever driven for like hours? No, you guys just love taking different variations of our picks. What are you talking about?

Uber an Uber's only tops like 40 minutes max This is like three hours you just did a pick of a moment that you were hitting like 183 at Hofstra when it happened Well, I didn't that I didn't make that pick. Okay I hit two 13 Because that is sick that you actually played college baseball three home rounds like yo I'm being honest that's sick Now you're panicking no, I'm not no, I'm not I You call what you call yourself the Matt stairs of the CAA

Rules Yeah paid pandering pandering pandepix or whack Our next pick is going to be in the serious studio standing next to Ed Sheeran. Okay, very good. So basically stealing our lot. You guys just want to be us. You're stealing our lot. It's like when J. Peterman took over

a brand new story. I mean, that's the most talk about pissing the history of this podcast. You guys were trying to get everyone to vote for us. Those are iconic pisses. Those are some of the best pisses I could ever think of. They're good pisses. They're both good pisses, but not your stories.

Yeah. Not your circuit, not your monster. You guys, one of them is a video. Everyone's seen it. Everyone loves pissed dogs. And one of them you've talked about every other podcast for seven years. So, whatever, this time. Iconic pisses.

Okay. All right. You have to stop sweating us. Stop sweating us so hard. You guys sweat us. You know that yeah, you do Okay, I'll go wonder and then you just pick whatever you want because I love our whole list. Okay This one shouldn't have lasted this long either the shower piss. Yep, the shower piss is elite I had a debate about this I was like, what?

What? I was like, you clean your feet. What are you fucking me? You're not sharpest. No, no, no, I'm down to go against my partner here. We were outside and I was like, wait a minute, I don't know what to say. He said, how do you clean your feet?

That's hilarious. That's hilarious. That's hilarious. But I was like, I was like, oh, shower piss, shower piss. He's like, what? I'm like, what do you mean? Hey, Eddie, what do you talk? Shower pisses are so gross.

How can you not pee in the shower? It's like automatic that I pee in the shower. How hold the piss to go in the shower? For sure. The water hits you, you have to, even if you just pissed, you have to pee again in the shower. It's also kind of badass when you're like,

a little dehydrated, and your piss is like yellow in the shower and some cool different colors. Yeah, Moisa Saloo used to piss on his own hands. That's when you're a little dehydrated and your piss is yellow in the shower and it's a cool different color. Yeah, Moisa Saloo used to piss on his own hands. That's cool. That's cool. I shit before shower.

I'm a piss during. Yeah. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy.

I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. That one might be just an honorable mention, but okay. Yeah, yeah, I can't believe you don't pee in the shower. So PFT, if you wanted to last one, I like it,

but I also think six seven is good. Sorry, not the last one, second to last one. Let me see, let me see, let me see. Okay, yeah, I think that's a last one. Let me see, let me see, let me see. Okay, yeah. I think that's a good one. Yeah, yeah. All right, our last pick, we're gonna take peeing onto a smoldering fire.

A fire that's going out, putting out the fire. So putting out your fire. That's a great pick. I know you know that rules, Billy. You can't fight against it, because you love it. One of the first. The coin camping, you got your own fire hose. Yeah.

Just been like, oh, I'll put it out. Yeah, it's so cool. It is good. One of the first memes I ever saw was like, a kid pissing with like your favorite team and then pissing on his rivals logos. Yeah. You guys see that one?

Calvin. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Calvin and I. I have a question. I've never done that. I think it sounds sick. What does that, what is like a hot piss like that smell like?

It doesn't you're outside So it doesn't smell like burnt. Yeah, it smells great. Yeah, no The oven is not it is an awesome. Yeah, no, I can see that being sick It's a masculinity This is all Especially if it's a night. Yeah, it sounds like he would sound like fajitas. Yeah, and like fire smokes. That sounds good. That sounds good.

Pick, we are going to go with our last pick in the ocean. Okay, good pick. We were debating that. We thought about that. We did shower piss. We think that's a better piss, so we didn't want to do too much. No, again, again, we're talking about all of your guys' pisses are very controllable.

Like you've pissed in the shower, you could piss in the toilet. What is that? But you're making it, you're being in the ocean, you're at the beach, you don't have an option, you can walk a million miles in the sand to go to a porta-potty, or you can just go in the ocean. No one's in a bad pit. Yeah, but you're confusing something right now.

You're basically saying it can only be a piss that you really have to do. Those are the best ones. Okay, so explain to me being with Mark Schler. You had to go, everyone had to do. Those are the best ones. Okay, so explain to me, uh, being with Mark Schler. You had to go. Everyone had to go. I was standing literally next to a toilet. I could have peed in the toilet. But the video we're in the bathroom. We wouldn't, wouldn't made the list of you just on the toilet. That's a lot closer than, you know, getting up and getting out of the toilet. It would be a lot less of iconic if you just pissers the toilet. There's

smalls in your arguments. Hmm. Not to degrade. Nope. It's just, I feel bad for women that they don't get to do most of these things. All of these are just dudes rock. I mean, ocean shower probably. They get you those. But it'd be very dangerous for a woman to put out a fire with her pants. Wait, how could they do it in the shower? This goes down their leg.

Yeah. I feel like it's not a dude in the shower. I feel like it's not a dude in the shower. Just open up a little bit. No, I think they just stand yeah just falls out whenever a woman stands up all her piss falls out of a jonna yeah maybe this is why women go to the bathroom together because like they don't get any other good

pisses yeah they just hang out girls will be girls or they have to like hold them above the toilet yeah yeah yeah okay last pick some great other power things we ever thought for we agreed on it. That means nothing This one I thought was gonna go this one I thought was gonna go so much earlier That's why I didn't bring it didn't put it high this one so no no no no you guys get you guys get to oh Get shot. All right pissing to get out of class Okay, what are we all

Bonyo? Everyone's done that. You get the bathroom pass. That's not even 15 minutes. That's like you just break sometimes this. Yeah. But everyone's done it. It's related. Okay. Which is why the middle of the night piss. Okay. I go with Jake's pick. Is the what? The cousin of the middle of the night drink. The middle of night piss is more annoying. It's not really an enjoy it. With one you wake up, you're like, off the game, you're like, I have to piss.

This sucks. You try to close your eyes. But getting out of class, it's like, you feel like you've been 15 minutes for being for 30 seconds. You feel like a bitch when you have to piss in the middle of the night. No, but then you wake up and you're like, oh, it's 3 a.m., I can sleep for another like three to six hours. I can see that.

Six hours. Six hours. And you're like, I'm usually mad at myself when I have to piss them up your man that you have to get up And then you try to will yourself to go back to sleep and then you realize this is gonna get worse before it gets better No, then you like check the perimeter. I like to I like the class one that that's that I mean everyone did Like oh, can I use the bathroom? Yeah, and you're not going to the bathroom, but sometimes you are oh We left a good one on the board

Well, wait, honorable mentions. Wiping off the stains on a toilet bowl with your piss. Oh, yeah. Like cleaning up the toilet with your pee. Yeah. This one is just a personal one, but the sink piss is elite. I thought you were going to say that. Yeah, well, I mean, I understand that I'm

in a minority here. Like, you know, I'm a persecuted class when it comes to the sink piss, but it is awesome Also, pissing in your side yard when you like yeah Like pissing like if you have a side yard like coming home and not even like pissing outside before you get in Yeah, I'm a pool party. Yeah, you don't want to go inside your old muddy party Well one of our picks and I don't want to hear anyone who just screws this, but I piss in every pool I've ever been in yep 100% yeah

Really? I hear anyone who disagrees with this, but I piss in every pool. I've ever been in. Yeah, 100%. Yep. Really? All the time. All the time. All the time. All the time. All the time. Yes.

Every pool. I've ever been in. That's true. I'm like, every pool. I piss. It's one thing of it's like a public pool, like a water park. No, it's the same. No, no, no, no.

It's the same. No, no, no, no. It's the same. It's the same. It's the same. No, no, no, no, no, you don't piss in hot tub. I do believe that the dilution is not there. I feel a little bit worse about doing it, but it's also so hot it makes you

pick. Sometimes I will get up, but I'm not going to say that I've never done it. I pee in hot tubs. I'd say 60% of the time. Yeah, hot tubs are not. Now I will make an effort. If there's an acceptable place to pee that's nearby where you don't have to go inside. in hot tubs, I'd say 60%. Yeah, hot tubs are not, now I will make an effort. If there's an acceptable place to pee that's nearby, where you don't have to go inside.

Correct. I will use that. Correct. This is respectful. And you know what? Yes. Here's my difference, actually. I don't think I ever pee in an indoor hot tub.

OK, I could see how that makes sense. It feels a little grosser. If I open the ground. Yeah, I'm about that 50%, 60% hot tubs, 101% in pools. I will stand not even getting in the pool and piss in the pool. Dude, hot tubs? That's how much I like pissing in pools. The thing is hot tubs will turn a different color

if you like, if you like, that's not true. That's not true. That's not exactly not true. Actually, I pissed hot tub like last week. When you listen to this, when you listen to this, you guys have all seen the dirty hot tubs tweet them at big hat and pft.

Okay, cool. Well, I go in clean hot tubs and then I make them dirty. Here's the thing is, we are just saying what people are too afraid to admit. Correct. And in fact, I think Billy P is in hot tubs. Yeah, I think you're definitely. I think you're not.

Well, that's why look at them and they're like, oh, it's dirty. Yeah, so you do pee in hot tub. Yeah, I think you're definitely does. Well, that's why I look at them and they're like, oh, it's dirty. Yeah, so you do pee in hot tub. Yeah, you do, do I try not to? This is my point of view. Yeah, I don't go out of my way to pee in a hot tub, but if the soil hot tub presents itself to me, then I will.

When the situation is in the hot tub. This is my point with pools. There's two types of people in the world. People who piss and pools and liars. That's it. Jake, I don't want to get rid of. I'm not in a good mutant. Okay, but you grim, not in those categories. Yeah, you're't want to get a new mutant. Okay, but you Graham, not in those categories.

Yeah, you're a mutant. You've never done it, Jake? Well, you did lie about your hole in one. Besides that. Yes. Jake, you've never done it? Have I peed in a pool before? Ever.

I don't think so, no. Oh my gosh. Definitely in the ocean. You know, every swimmer does it. I love being a pool. Really? Yeah, like the Olympic size pool? Yes, oh, definitely. Every swimmer. Yeah, best. Also, after an airplane ride, I know you size. Yes. Oh, definitely.

Every swimmer. It's a best. Also, after an airplane ride, I know you can piss on an airplane, but I mean, there's a reason why the urinals are packed right outside of a gate. Yeah. I had that on the, after an airplane ride, when you're on the window, because you don't want to get up. I also said that pissing on an airplane is probably Mount Rushmore of worse. It's bad.

Yeah, that is just being in that bathroom. It's the worst buses. Buses is worse. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, pissing in a bottle on a road trip and not having to stop. Yeah, we had pissing in a bottle. A leech. Picking off of any elevated surface.

Yep. And then watching it fall down. Watching it fall down. I had a dog pissing on a fire hydrant. Yeah, just a classic of hilarious. Hilarious. Any long line like out of sporting event? Like 15, 20 minutes.

That's kind of sucks. That's what I'm really wanting to say for you guys. The moment you got to the front. Yeah, no, that's good. Yeah. The um, uh, pissing in between cars at a football tailgate. Also awesome.

Open up the doors. Yeah. And you're just like, because you. Yeah. And you're just like, because you've been drinking and you're just like, I need a piss. Pissed in there. Pissing, pissing between subway cars. Haven't done that.

Exilarating. Alley pisses. That sounds awful. Alley pisses are great. That's a great piss. Porta Potty's one of the worst. You find a nice dumpster to go behind in an alley, so you're shielded.

Oh, that's the best. The first piss after an STI clears up. Yep. Great piss. Also golf course. No pain. Golf course. Yeah. Great piss. Outdoor. Do you guys think peeing out a nice course is rude? Like, dependent. Is it like, I actually think the nice of the course the more open it is to that. There is no like,

peeing outside just is, yeah, it just is what it is to that. I'm there is no like Being outside just is yeah, it just is what I feel like if we're lucky enough to play a gospel one day Like we wouldn't do that dude. It's great my because my son is so young and he like is potty trained when he has to pee when we're outside I'll just let him pee anywhere like on the street. I don't give a fuck has anyone ever got a public urination I have a half I have really as well I don't give a fuck has anyone ever got a public urination. I have I have really as well college college college college college you get fine You're such a danger came over he was I think yeah he comes over he shakes your hand and then he 200 bucks but then he 75 My mind was expensive. I was 200. I think my was 200. Yeah

Let's see we did no one pick the morning piss? Morning piss is great. That's crazy. That's a great piss. Oh, yeah, color check. That's what I'm excited about. Oh, yeah. I'm hydrated.

And you just feel great or not hydrated. Yeah, bad team. It's sneaky piss. When you get away with pissing, when you're really not supposed to. When are you not supposed to piss? In various of these situations. What, go outside?

Like when no one notices that you're even pissing, because you're like doing a casual. Okay. Like there's something in front of you. You was in the middle of my life. I was in the middle of my life. Not pissing. Have you guys ever done a Zoom piss?

Where they don't know that you're peeing on a Zoom call? Yes. I've done that. It's crazy. It's what a rush. What are your cameras still on? Yeah, cameras still on. Yeah, it's like you're basically

like that guy, what's his name? Tupin rush. With your camera still on. Yeah, camera still on. Oh, wow. It's like you're basically like that guy, uh, what's his name? Tupin. Yeah. Fretupe. You guys ever pissed while riding a bicycle? Cause I've been able to pull that off. That was sick.

Accidentally. Yeah. Like I've had it, I've had it. You locked your legs. It's gotten squares out of me. Yeah. They probably do that during like the Iron Man, right? Are you still peddling the bike?

No, you locked your legs. You just piss off the side. Can't do it in a wind Obviously, and you need to get a little bit of speed. Yeah, you get it. Yeah, what in your pants or no Dic out and just fucking go off to the side Is it a thing in other sports or just like rugby where they take the you take a knee on the field and you just pull your dick to the side and pee on the field No, you do that. Yeah, that was just for school. I do that a long lose a one year. The bike is just for sport. Right? Yeah. No, there's no. Yeah, I just like pissing right.

Right. Right. The random like places I'm not supposed to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah a bike. Yeah, now that's, yeah. That's a challenge. All right, I think we, oh, this is one that we totally missed, ice in the urinal. Yeah, that was kind of a shake, yeah. Oh, brutal miss. Brutal miss. That is, when you get an ice in the urinal,

also, I like, this might be weird, but I like the wriggly troughs, because you just don't, there's no, like you don't have to aim or anything you just stand there and piss It is a little weird because you are standing like dick to dick with a bunch of dudes But there's also just no it's just free reign. Yeah, if you can squeeze in you can make it. It's like a wide open receiver There's there's a concert then you in northern Virginia that had one of those tross except it was a circle bowl So you had to stand up. Oh, yes

It was probably like 20 feet wide it was a circle bowl. So you had to stand up. Oh yes. It was probably like 20 feet wide. It was massive. And you had to walk up to it. And there were guys just on the other side of the wall with their dick out peeing at you. I've seen that. And you had to pee at them into this big ass.

It was like a bird bath. Yeah. So you're pissing into. It sucked. That might be the worst case. No, that rocks. Like interior rocks. But until you've been at one of those things

at a poison concert when you're 17 years old and you've got probably 30, 55-year-old guys with their dicks out peeing right at you. Reality hits you hard and it's not that cool. Yeah, yeah, that I've seen those those are brutal because you're just staring at the pissing contest. At a time it was fun. What was the pissing contest? Who can see you can piss the life? Oh sword fights, yeah. No, no, like you're like out in the lake and you're trying to see you can piss the farthest.

Oh yeah, yeah. Sword fights are awesome. Sword fights with the boys, yeah. Yeah, I do it with my son, it's awesome. Sword fight all the time. I fucking dominate him. I like the year and all that. Touch the floor, like they're so tall.

You literally just piss on the floor. Yeah. Although those get a little splash back. They can, Yeah. Yeah. Let's get a little splash back. It doesn't mark the spot. Yeah. I should. I love pissing in pools. I want a piss in a pool right now. Yeah. Oh my god. It's so bad. We should do a podcast from a pool. Yeah. I just want to just go to the pool just to piss and get right out. Jake, have you never you've never piss in a pool? No, I was just think, I tapped PFT on the shoulder. I got a water park when I was younger.

So I think there's a pool where we're staying. Yes. Yeah, it's Jake, you should do it. You want to piss in it? See, like, that's a nice hotel. Yeah, I know. It's doing that. So you feel better about doing it around poor people?

Yeah. That's messed up. I would do it in my own pool, like if I were to do it for the first time. Yeah. Because I'm like, all upset my mom, but she'll get over it. Now I want to get invited to your house just to piss in your pool. How would she know? That's the thing they never know. Yeah, you don't know. You don't have to tell your mom right now.

I feel like I feel like guilty doing it to her than to a random change of pool. I guarantee you your mom pees in her pool. And shout out by the way, whoever started the blue dye, like rumor back in the day, that just got kids to not piss in the pools, like all they put blue dye. So if you piss it will, I've never, has it ever happened?

No, never. Right. It's not a real thing. But they did a great job of scaring all the little kids. It's child abuse. Yeah. I powered through that. Mentally tough.

Just peed anyway. Okay, good night rush for everyone. Today's my rush more is brought to you by Stella Blue Coffee, Amazon Prime Day is here, help make Stella Blue Coffee the number one coffee and cold brew on all of Amazon, 20% off Stella Blue on Amazon, 20% off. That's a screaming good deal. It's the best price that you will ever get Stella Blue Coffee for. And for every purchase, a portion of the proceeds

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Great coffee, better purpose. Okay. Yeah. Do go by and if you buy on Amazon Prime Day, please leave a review for Still Blue Coffee. It helps a lot. I told you guys we had a Monday reading and I tipped off memes that I wanted to make sure he was on the show today.

So memes, I want you to chime in whenever you feel necessary. I'll jump around, but here's the Monday reading. It comes to me about memes, right? Well, kind of, it comes from slate and it's titled, The Reply Guys Who One. Repeatedly commenting on your crush's Twitter posts is a terrible dating strategy until it isn't. And it's an entire article about dudes that are reply guys who ended up dating the chicks they were replying to. I gotta I'm gonna read a couple

snippets but this is literally the story. I'm actually upset they didn't use memes in this article because he was our reply guy that we ended up fucking. Not actually. I'm not actually. Just dry-humping. memes in this article because he was our reply guy that we ended up fucking. Not actually. Not actually. Just dry-humping. Yeah, right, right, right. Okay, so.

All right, here it is. All right, REL, a 32-year-old flight attendant in Los Angeles actually married one of her reply guys. They recently celebrated her second wedding anniversary. She remembers his replies to her tweets back when they were first talking as being a cut above. It would be, it would just be like, it wouldn't just be like, your hot.

The way he did it was so much more delicate and sweet and poetic and not like disgusting. Ariel's not her real name. And then it talks to the reply guy who says, I've been a 37 year old lawyer and Ariel's husband started following his now wife in 2017 when a picture of her happened across his feed one fateful day, I thought to myself, this is the most beautiful face I've ever seen in my life. This is a guy online who sees a face online says, wow, I need this. He said with around 5,000

followers, she wasn't hugely famous or anything but to Ivan who had 19 followers That's a perfect reply guy number by the way. Yep like 19 followers. Probably followed 3,000 people. Yes is perfect But with 19 followers. She was way out of his league He hit follow, but he didn't interact with her for more than a year I need I didn't even have the courage or self confidence to even be a reply guy at that point. So he was a reply guy in waiting He was a lurker. Yeah playing it cool. Get the entire landscape. Here's the best part But after a while he started to notice a way he could differentiate himself Every reply guy has had this epiphany by the way being like no, she's gonna fuck me

I would see under every post that she had all these dudes that were just like wow beautiful gorgeous I haven't continued. I was just like I don't want to do that She gets at so many times from all these people all over the country if he could show he wasn't like the rest of them He might have a shot. This is a real article by the way An opportunity to break the silence finally rose in 2019. I posted something like, uh, this is from Ariel. I posted something like, I had a bad day at work who wants to buy me a stake. Ariel said, and so our first real interaction was on Venmo because he sent me $20 first stake. This is a very dangerous article. It's just the worst. It's giving so much hope to so many guys out there

that they're just like, you know what? I just got a post harder. I just haven't posted enough yet. Oh my God, reply guys are finally winning. It's a whole article about reply guys just finding a way to reply their way into relationships with hot chicks online. Yeah, memes do you have a moment where you're like, hey, I think I think I might be in with these guys.

So my first tweet when I created the part of my meme count, big cat retweeted it and I got a thousand followers instantly. Wow. Yeah, so there, so you got your reply, you were just like, boom, it's on site. Yeah, first site. I was like, I think I got something here. But remember what it was?

I think it was Coach Dugs on, it was that photo that's in the studio of the guy on the water ski. Yeah, with Coach Dugs photoshopped onto it. Oh man. I, here's one other guy. Sounds like a banger. Devon is a 32 year old journalist who is a following in the world of Philadelphia sports Twitter and last summer a guy named Eric himself a known

quantity in that scene to a lesser degree very publicly declared himself her reply guy. He started tweeting about her and sending silly replies to posts of hers. I posted a photo of me and my friend at a Philly's game and was like, I want you to hit me with a baseball bat. And now I'm getting, I got a rock. It was fucking the best, the best. It was a bit, but it also wasn't. It became a community preoccupation. So many other people within Philly Sports Twitter would kind of weigh in and came a community preoccupy occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup- occup It was just cute. It was like everyone kind of had his back and shipped us in a way. So look at that.

I think we never do that. I think we never do that for his boy Tom Brady. This is a whole article about reply guys finding a way in. So yeah, very dangerous. BFT, I completely agree. I do want to hear, I want to fast forward like 50 years from now, 60 years from now, when they have grandkids. And like, how'd you meet, How'd you guys end up meeting?

So, well, I told your grandma that she was so hot that I wanted her to hit me in the face with the baseball bat. Yeah. So, I was actually her number one reply guy. So it was pretty beautiful. It was a beautiful relationship from the start. So yeah, reply guys finally have a win. Well, let's go around the room real quick because I'm pretty sure that most people

in this room have some sort of a reply guy situation that they found themselves in. Like, big cat, I know that you would reply to a silo a lot. Yeah, I reply guy to him trying to get him to lift with me. I was a big reply guy for Florio, honestly. Yeah. And we have reply guys shout out that FSU Brando. Well, that guy. Love that guy. Florio, honestly. Yep, and we have reply guys, shout out to FSU Brando. Love that guy. Love that guy, Clue Haywood. Yep, big reply guy.

I have another reply guy who I retreats sometimes I need to give a shout out to. Bully football. Bully football. He just bullies me after every tweet. That's literally all he does. Yeah, he just like shit's on. It's really funny.

That sounds really fun. Do you guys have any reply guys that you just like know and you're like, yeah, that's my guy. Oh, yeah, this guy. I out lasted the kid that used to tweeted us about getting actually never mind. I'm going to say, Oh, what? There was a reply guy, but he did. He I I I'll ask them. He was he was fighting for response for like two years You I'm sure you guys saw some of them. I think I forget the Rotlotterry ball But he's dead he he he gave up he actually died I hope so Is that if you're a plug-out there and you just comment on hot chicks pictures all the time, don't give up. It's the meme where the guy is digging for diamonds and there's one guy that gives up and he's like an inch away from finding the diamond mine.

The next post might be the one that does it. Yeah. I mean, when we run the Greg Olson interview next week, I have a funny story about my guy, VP of Big Cat Corp, who was an original reply guy who was like part of my life now. So I guess he should have been in this article as well. He found his way into my life. It's reply guys. They win. PFT is Miley responding? No, but it is funny like when I when I tweet at Miley and everybody like backs me up like they back up this one guy Yeah, you'll thank you for for donating your Lambo to my grandmother. She's really sick and at a hard time

Get into the hospital last week dude. Maybe you need to get like a Photoshop picture of you in a Philly's jersey. I'd be like, I just want you to hit me with a bat. Yeah, I don't know. I might be over Miley, Loki. Oh, no way. I'm sorry to do you. She's too skinny.

I like Kim Kardashian type figures. No, thanks. I'm not gonna like that. So we'll talk about it. No, PFT, you can go for Kim Kub. It'd be nice. I mean, upgrade for you. I would not can go for Kim K. That'd be nice. It'd be an upgrade for you. I would not, me and Kim K, I would never work.

I just, she would break me in half. Oh. Just like when you're at the level that you're at with Tom, it's like it's, yeah. It's almost impossible for him to upgrade. No, yeah, no, it's your right, Hank. Like, what's the most, if any of us were dating Kim K, like that's great for us.

The true definition of a best friend is Talking your friends out of having sex with insanely attractive women How would you go crazy If you started dating Kim Kay Lee, what do you think? Hank yeah, that would be a power couple who would fall back into his old franny lied in ways fall back into his old franny lied in ways. That would be so awesome if Kim K dumped Hank because he golfed too much. I just want a man around more. Hank, can you tell us like who would be an acceptable person for Tom Brady to date?

Good question. Good question. I know what Hank wants a little class. What about Sydney Swini too young? To be a little class. What about Sydney, sweetie, too young? Too young. Okay. What about Shakira? Okay. Shakira. She's got Kate Winslet. Yeah. Yeah. That's what you want. You want the, yeah, like a, a classic and halfway. Merrill, creep, Pippa Middleton. Oh, some McCarthy.

No, he could date Kate. He could be the new Wango. Kate Middleton. Kate Middleton's. Dueliepa? Dueliepa, yeah. Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift.

Think about that. Think about that. She's not. She's not. Yeah, bangers. Yeah. All right, that's our show. By the way, take these are coming on Friday.

So everyone be on your best behavior. Like and subscribe. Tell everyone to subscribe. Go subscribe on some extra phones because take these are coming Friday and we want the AWLs to go for eight in a row, but it might not happen. So I will say I appreciate a lot of a lot of AW wells were earning their takeies by reaching out and telling

me how I kind of got screwed in Dungeons and Dragons. All everything that happened at the end. I should have got benefited a lot more kills. So there was a lot. It was an overwhelming amount of of DMs and responses of people being like, Hey, just

you know, big catch, I tried to screw you, but we got you. That's a lot like I've been listening. I tell like they're being just Hank Simpson know, a big catch, I tried to screw you, but we got you back. I mean, the word winning list, I'm like, they're being just Hank Simpson. Yeah, they're Hank Simpson. They're corporate suits are bootleakers. Can you stop clicking that thing? Max is asking you to stop clicking that thing.

I'm not me. There's something in your hand that you keep playing with and it's making a sound. Yeah. What is it? Fact or fiction is there something in your hand? In your right hand right now. Show your hand.

Guess what it is. Oh, it's some goblins. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck you. All right. Jesus Christ, PFT. How is the fourth, though?

It's good numbers. Six nine four. I won. I won. That was nice. Really, that was nice. You ready? He was awesome.

He's too close to me right now. I was also distracted. I'm watching the end of this USA candidate again. It's all right. More concern with soccer? Okay. I'll go 17. 26.

I'm gonna go 48. Oh. Size of Kim Kardashian's ass. Last thing, forgot. Forgot if this is gonna be a weird thing to say but just Trust me that we have good intentions if you live Anywhere between buffalo and Detroit and have a big piece of land that you wouldn't mind the boys coming over to and building a really big hole Hit us up. P-M-T-N-Turn at BarstoolSports.com.

We want a fucking dig dig. We have excavating experience. No, we don't. But yes, so we want someone who's willing to let us build. Let's just say three hours of whole digging. And we'll leave it at that. But yeah, only real increase, please. This is not going to go well.

There's no way to show up to like some dudes like, oh, fucking apartment complication. Yeah, when they say we use your the deed to your house. Yeah, dead your house pictures. You you in front of the picture with with your phone out in the time stamp and a dig safe report and a dig safe report. Oh, yeah, that's good point, Billy. Yeah, excavating. But also would be kind of funny if there wasn't a dig safer port and a dig safer port. Oh, yeah, that's good point Billy. Yeah, excavating

But also would be kind of funny if there wasn't a dig safer or yeah, that's dangerous If you already beach Yeah, bonus points if you think maybe there's some oil on your property I still think we should do East Palestine and help get rid of some of that toxic dirt there It's on the list. It's on the list. All right. One means you've got this. No. One. Okay. What was your numbers? We have 20. 48. Hank. 26. Okay. Martin St. Louis.

64 64 and 64 I'd for the hummingbirds have eggs the size of peace I don't love what I'm to say I'll say it anyway The day is on my day to buy you Shine away I'll be coming for your lover, okay Shine away I'll be coming for your lover, okay

You've been so good to me Give you me, baby You've been so good to me Your love is good to me You're love sadly Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love?

Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love? Oh, did it say love?'m gonna say it, but I'll be selfish I'll be, I'll be selfish I'll be, I'll be selfish I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish

I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish I'll be, oh, I said, I'll be selfish You're all things up to remember, you shine on me Love coming to me in the morning light

Love coming to me in the morning light Take on me Take on me, oh, you're a new world Take on me, take on me, oh, you're a new world I'm gonna make a living Make a living Make a living Make a living Make a living you