Pardon My Take - Steve-O, CFB On The Ropes And The PGA Championship

Episode Date: August 10, 2020

College Football is officially on the ropes. We talk about the lack of a cool billionaire to come save the day really fucking sucks and why cancelling the CFB season may not be as smart as people think (2:56 - 17:45). PGA Champion Colin Morikawa turned a thrilling tourney into a cakewalk on the final 2 holes (17:45 - 24:38). Who’s back of the week (24:38 - 36:38). Steve-O joins the show to talk about his new special, Jackass, his favorite stunt, how stunts get assigned and how he can puke just from thinking about puking (36:38.- 86:31). Segments include hockey talk, this league, and Billy’s listYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. On today's pardon my take, we have Steve Oh, awesome, awesome interview, probably the hardest that PFT and I have ever fanboyed out. We've had a lot of big guests, but Steve Oh, we basically went Chris Farley like, Hey dude, remember that time that Preston farted into a tube and then you puked or remember that time you got bit by an alligator. Awesome time though with him. He's got a new special out. He gives us a lot of behind the scenes stuff. So get ready for that. Also, maybe if you're listening in a car with kids, don't listen to the whole thing because there's

some Steve Oh stuff. They have to learn sooner or later. Steve Oh stuff. Yeah. I mean, they'll walk away from that saying he ate Chris Ponies has come. Maybe I should light myself on fire more. I'll say it now. So that way when it when it gets said, it doesn't feel as jarring. We have news around the sports world. We have the PGA championship. We have who's back of the week and this league and Billy is back. Unfortunately, we did not reach what we say. We had had two million downloads. I think we only had one million. One point nine. Yep. So we were close. So Billy's allowed back. Billy didn't listen to the show. So he has no idea what we're talking about right now. Oh, so what did we say? You said that I think

got if they listened 17 times that it would up the listening rate and I get kicked off the show. Okay. And then PFT made several jokes about how many like shows should have done that with characters. Got it. Okay. That's enough. All right. We got it. You're here. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So Billy's back before we get to all that part of my take is brought to you by cash app. Not only is it the easiest place to send money to your friends, it's the safest. Go download the cash app right now. It is the number one social distancing app in the world. We love the cash app. It links directly to your bank account. Fantasy football is coming up. You can be the guy who pays first before everyone else. You can

also send money to your friends, family, whatever you want to do. The cash app hasn't ready to go and free money, free money. When you download the cash app and enter the referral code barstool, you get $10 for free. Go buy yourself a couple of beers this weekend. And then $10 goes to ASPCA. So download the cash app from the App Store, Google Play Store today and get involved with the cash app. Okay. Let's go. It's part of my take presented by Barstools. Welcome to part of my take presented by the cash app. Go download it right now. Use code Barstool. You get $10 for free. $10 to the ASPCA. Today is Monday, August 10th. PFT. Are you in the right headspace to receive

information that could possibly hurt you? Hang on. No. Yes. College football has been canceled. Yeah. Not officially, but it feels like we're on the ropes. The Mac canceled on Saturday, which as we all know, the Mac is the most important conference out there. So the Domino's have fallen since then. Right now, as we're sitting here on Sunday night, it has not been officially canceled, but I think we need to just expect the worst and hope for some long shot miracle to happen and have the season happen. But as we're sitting here right now, it feels like the big 10 is going to announce that they're canceling on Monday and then who knows what's going to happen. I could still see the SEC being

like, fuck everyone we're playing, which I will watch every single game. But that is where we're at. I'm sad. It hurts pain. It's bad. It's not a good position to be in as far as sports fandom goes, but I think maybe the NFL will step up this fall and as long as they have a season, they'll probably have some games going on Saturdays. So we could run into a situation where it's like game Thursday night, game Saturday afternoon, game Saturday night, games all day on Sunday. So they'll fill the void to a certain extent. But yeah, it's going to suck not having college football on Saturday. The only spin zone is LSU, back to back national champions. They remain the title holders.

What I don't, I get, I understand all of it because essentially it boils down to, and I see all these tweets, people being like MLB figured it out, basketball figured it out, NHL figured it out, golf figured it out. Well, guess what the difference is? This is the one sport where they don't pay their athletes. And if they pay their athletes, I actually think it would happen. They would basically be like, Hey, do you want to get paid? Okay, come play. Cause you can't really ask a 19 year old to go out there and play during a pandemic, not knowing the future health implications necessarily when they're not getting paid

to do it. And the problem is the NCAA will do everything, including cancel a season before they pay their athletes. So they want to keep the air of student athletes and amateurism alive, even though we all know that's foolish. But I still go back to the fact that I really do think the, the part that's not getting talked about, and Trevor Lawrence had a great tweet thread that when you take football away from these huge teams and basically say, go fend for yourself, there is a possibility it can be at times more dangerous when you're like, you're not getting tested anymore. You're not under, you know, a supervision all the

time. You're not part of a team atmosphere, basically go fend for yourself. And I think that's a valid argument that just kind of gets lost where everyone says we have to cancel it. Like there's nuance to this. And the United States of America doesn't do well with nuance anymore. But you're right. I think that like having access to world class healthcare, or at least like United States class healthcare at the top of it, when you're like, if you're an athlete at Clemson, you are getting much, much better care taken care of you than you are if you're just like a random 21 year old in Aiken, South Carolina.

And how about if you want to play, you have to follow like you have to wear a mask and you have to socially distance. You have to, you have to be cautious. Whereas the alternative is let's just let all the student athletes go out in the world. And who knows what happened because guess what? It's, it's now they're just part of, and I get the liability and everything. Billy told us a fact that one in 50 offensive linemen will die from a heart attack during a game, which I don't know where he got that fact out of his ass. He literally just said that before the show. I get all of it. I'm just sad that we're probably not going to have college football this season. I wish they could figure it out. And it feels like

it's being made to be a black and white issue when it's not fully that where they're, I got away. What I keep going back to the PFT on, I want to hear your way, but what I keep going back to is why, why cancel it right now when like if in March, New York was absolutely ravaged by coronavirus, now New York's doing pretty well. Like I don't, I don't know, I guess you kind of have to because you can't just let people just linger there, but it feels like, I don't know, maybe delay it a month, delay it two months, see if things get better and knowing that it probably won't, but at least you give the opportunity that maybe we can figure out a way instead of being like, here we are first, second week of August,

everything's canceled. We're done. Okay. What about this idea? I stole this from Breaking Bad. What if they just elected to pay the players, but they're like, we'll pay you guys each a dollar. Now you're technically employees or minimum wage. Like in Breaking Bad, when they, they saved Bob Odenkirk's life, better call Saul's life. It was like, Hey, pay me a dollar. Now I'm officially your lawyer. You know, now I can, now you can tell me anything that you want. And I can't say anything. If you find a way to make the players professionals. Now, what about this? Actually like a serious way to do it? What if just every football program disassociated themselves from the

school technically? So they're like a small business that's being run in South Bend, Indiana or a small business in Austin, Texas, or Tuscaloosa, one that like is a little bit separate from the schools themselves. So then all of a sudden, yeah, you can have like a loose affiliation with the campus, but you're not working underneath the NCAA anymore. Now it's just like a collection of small businesses across the country that happen to kick-ass at football. I'm in for that. It's like company, it's like company softball teams, right? You bring in some ringers, you pay the guys more to work at your company. So then you dominate in the season against the other power plant in in Albuquerque. So like, why not have a way where

we can at least this, this is a moment for college sports where you can say, this is the time if there was ever a time to like, just get rid of the whole ruse that is that they won't, these guys aren't making machines for you. That bothers me the most is why are all billionaires fucking dorks and losers? Because if I were a billionaire right now, I'd sit down and be like, Hey, I just crunched the numbers. 70 or so power five teams, pay each player 100 guys on a team $100,000 at $700 million. If I had, if I had Bezos money, dude, if you're Bloomberg, that would make you a president. You could have used that $700 million instead of your weird fucking three week campaign and

just paid the players and we would have had college football and everyone would have voted for you. Would you pay for your own stadium? No, no, no, that has to be tax incentives. Yes, I will get the bear in my back pocket. Listen, all the all the people will have to pay for my stadium. But you know what? I actually think that most people, at least in SEC country would take that in a heartbeat where it's like, yeah, raise my taxes one to two percent to fund a new stadium. Yes, give it to billionaire big cat and he's going to make football. I just wish we had one cool billionaire. Yeah, one cool billionaire who's like, you know what? I got $20 billion. What's a bill? What's throwing a bill at this so that the country can be happy

on Saturdays in the fall? Nothing? Yes. Fuck that. This is why the lottery needs to put out bigger jackpots. How much is Jeff Bezos? We need we need billionaires out there that are right. Absolutely nothing to get their money. Like somebody that is just given a lottery ticket for a billion dollars. A dude like that would come up with a sweet kick ass idea. That's this to Jeff Bezos has fucking $190 billion. You can't give me one bill, Jeff. Jeff, you fuck. Do it. I shouldn't say this because now he's going to the robots and all that shit. Bill Gates has 113 billion. Give me one bill, Bill. The rock right now has an opportunity. Bill. If the rock. Florio put this out here. I talked about it last

week, but if the XFL was able to work a bubble, then they could get the college players to play for an XFL team in the bubble. I don't think that's going to happen. I just want college football. What I just said to you was exactly what you're saying, but I put the letters XFL in front of it. No, but the problem with we're talking about the college. No, because college football players, your your premises, college football players will then decide to play in the XFL to improve their draft status. I think that actually would hurt their draft status for a good portion of them. You don't think about the downside because they're going to play against adults and if they look bad, now their upsides gone and now they can go

like we always talk about, oh, you go from a third round to a first round. What about a third round or a seventh round? Or what you could do if you're the XFL is you could say, we're not going to have it be the same as last year where it's not going to be grown men. This is specifically for like college. Then I'm fine with that. Yes. Okay. So that's essentially college players play, but I also you root for the laundry. I mean, you need the XFL to be the you know, the colors and the bands and all that stuff. It doesn't feel the same when it's whatever the the whip snakes versus the chrono legends. There's going to be a big gaping hole in the south this fall, and that's going to be no college football on Saturdays. There's saving

might die. There's a big saving might die. You just killed Nick Saban. Not do it. Does Nick Saban count as a coronavirus death? No, Nick Saban just counts. I think it's adjacent. It's a football death. Yeah, but it's adjacent coronavirus caused it. I think that if you're looking to set up a business in the south, just like start a church in the south right now where you have service on Sundays, your communion is natty light, bud light and I don't know, cheez-its and cornbread and pulled pork. And you just encourage people to show up and get drunk. People are going to just be looking for an excuse to party on a Saturday, and they're not going to have it this fall. The worst part about this like just not knowing what's going to happen is I'll believe anything. So I saw some guy

tweet. He had 246 followers. He said he's an independent journalist, and his tweet was that Penn State, Ohio State and Michigan and Nebraska are planning on joining the Big 12 this year. And I was like, this guy, he's making a lot of sense. What if there's a conference realignment that just keeps happening into September? Just ideas of teams that want to join. The last conference that doesn't cancel the season, you're going to have these football powerhouses at least considering joining your conference. Can we do an opt in? If your team decides the problem is, I keep going back to this. When we talked about players probably being safer if they're in the facility and they're playing football and they're being monitored, that still does rely on the

coaches being decent human beings, which most of them aren't. Like they will definitely take advantage of it. So in a perfect world, you hope like, hey, if all the players were in the facility and they're getting tested and they had medical, you know, looking after them and everything that was good, it's probably safer. But then you just throw in the fact that a coach will be like, oh, you have coronavirus, tough shit, you got to play. It would be hilarious if or your scholarship is getting if Michigan decided that they were going to be the last holdout and they started to schedule games against like little sisters of the poor. And like the we went back into sort of junior college that still don't make me do that. Michigan wins. They

go five and oh against teams that have make me do that have like part time students. And then they declare a national championship. Don't make me do it. I'm going to do it. Also while you're looking this up, I'm going to do it. I'm going to quote our good friend Ian Rappaport because he said he I think he really has his finger on the pulse. He said, imagine if college football had the kind of leadership that the NFL and the NFL PA showed over the last few months to put the league in its players in a position to play a full season amid a pandemic, just the incredible hours of work and teamwork and the NCAA is the opposite. Yep. Congrats to the NFL for putting in the requisite 48 hours before the players reported camp to figure out how they're going to handle the COVID

virus. Shocking. He could send that tweet with his face all the way up. Roger Goodell's asshole. Yeah. I'm surprised he could use his thumbs when they're both holding water. Oh my God. Yeah. So Michigan football, we can go back in time. Night 1896. They played Grand Rapids High. Yeah. Have Michigan play against high schools. Beat them. Harbour would be down to that. They started Eastern Michigan, then Grand Rapids High, then just a team named Physicians and Surgeons. Uh huh. What was the spread on that game? They won that game only 28 nothing. Wow. Fucking God damn it. So Michigan overrated and then they played Lake Forest, Purdue, Lehigh, Minnesota, Oberlin, Wittenberg and Chicago. And this was like before like the teams are

traveling by train, I would have to imagine. They would invite teams and then teach them how to play football, then whoop them up like every little brother ever. I mean every big brother ever. Do it Michigan. I'm going to teach you how to do this game. Now I'm going to beat you by 100. In 1894, they played Michigan Military Academy twice. Twice. And then they played It's tough to beat Adrian. It's tough to beat MMA all of that. I don't even know what these places are. This is, we need to go back in time. We need to let Michigan just make their own schedule, go back in time and just start whooping up on random people. I would watch it. Yes, I'd watch anything on Saturday. I do hope they have NFL on Saturday. Oh, here's the only positive.

Okay. One positive. Let's finish this with one positive. Kirk Herb Street, Chris Fowler on Monday Football will be phenomenal. They're a great Monday Football booth and they're going to call Monday Football. They will be, that will be a good, we won't have a season of complaining about Monday Football. And Herb Street, Scott, the Trent Dill for Private Jet that he can take around. So he's not going to get sick. Yep. So that is one positive. There's the one positive that we can go with there that feels like maybe there's still socks. You're right. I do think that there's a good chance that Nick Saban, the likelihood that he dies from having no football is actually way higher than the likelihood that he dies from coronavirus. Right. Exactly. You

are putting his life at risk. People who are deciding to cancel this, it's fucking sucks. I would say him, the Stoops brothers probably. Yep. I'm going to go with Jimbo Fisher doesn't, I feel like he needs football. Charlie Weiss, he probably won't get his payment. That's true. How is this going to affect his buyout? Herm Edwards, how is Herm Edwards going to be able to turn young boys into upstanding young men if he doesn't have a football season in which to teach them? Oh man, we need, maybe that's what we do. Maybe we have just a live cam like when like a bald eagle is about to give birth. We just have a live cam on Nick Saban every Saturday in the fall, just him puttering around the house. I would bet on Nick Saban eating his cream pies and watching

the weather channel. He probably still gets up at the same time every morning. Absolutely. He'll drive into the office. Yes. So he'll hallucinate that he's going to be playing like UAB that weekend, drop a game playing for him. All right. You know, actually, you know what we should do. Yeah. Without any sort of instruction whatsoever, we should just put Xbox consoles in the hands of the coaches and have them play an NCAA 14 tournament against each other. That would be good. And just watch them call to his place like it was a real game. And yeah, all of them get pissed. Yes. Watch that in a second. Now, people are probably saying you talked a lot about college football. Aren't you missing a big tournament that happened? We're going to talk

about the PJ championship. Brooks lost the course one. What the fuck do you want from us? The course one this weekend. He didn't have. He was hurt. Brooks. His hip. Brooks injured his leg. No, I think. Wait, hold on. We would Brooks would never make an excuse. But if we were to make an excuse for Brooks, he was so clearly hurt and anyone who's talking bad about him right now can go fuck themselves. We don't make fun of somebody that's injured. We don't root for injuries. Right. We make fun of them when they complain about little ants. Right. The course one, it defeated Brooks Moraquillo. He hit an awesome shot. That was that's right. That's right. He drove it to within what like five feet on a par four. It was just it's actually perfect

that he won in the exact way that Bryson would have wanted to win by like flexing his drive on a par four. And then Bryson had a chance where I think it was on 18. He could have gotten close. And then he ended up about like one club length short. So he wasn't strong enough to put himself in position to win. I've got to imagine that Bryson he his stretch marks that he has on his body right now from putting on what 50 to 240. It's funny because he looks like a tiger right now with the stripes. Sometimes they'll have on like ESPN his old picture and it just looks nothing like absolutely not. So it was actually it was phenomenal golf. I was I was glued to it all weekend. It was great that we got like prime time golf. The only complaint I have is when you get to Sunday afternoon

or Sunday evening and there was that moment there was like six guys tied for first and your brain just says this is going to be incredible because we're going to have like a five way tie and a five way like sudden death. You know last man standing over time and then it just didn't happen because more color had that insane shot. Yeah. Like you get all built up like this is going to be incredible. They're going to have to have five guys tee off for you know a three hole playoff and then he just dusted everyone in the last three holes. If your guys not winning then you just root for chaos. That's what you have to do at that point. And then it throws into play like what do you do if there's a six person playoff. Is it going to take place tomorrow morning because it's

getting late. Is it going to happen now. How many holes is it. How long is it going to last. Like one of the best sports experiences of my life was back in. I think it was 2008 Tiger and they had the U.S. Rockville at the end of that Sunday when you're like guess what we get an entire another day like a bonus day of major championship golf. That is something you like I'm not doing shit at work tomorrow. I made some I made some golf fans very upset when I when Brooks had it like a little bit of a hip thing. And I was like there's never been a player. No. Who's who's played around with a leg injury in a champion in a major champion. Yeah. It was like both Tiger one with a broken leg and an ACL. Yeah. I know. I know who Tiger was. And also we don't know what Brooks has.

Brooks might have two torn ACLs. You don't know that. Let's not judge a person's injury using the eyeball test. It's called a hippo violation. It was awesome though. It was awesome golf. It's I mean any major whether you're talking about the travelers or the masters. It's all awesome. I do love it being on West Coast time though. Yes. That is so great. That's like you don't normally see golf in prime time like this. I expected like it'd be sweet if they put the Sunday night football guys up there with Jim Nance to do the commentary at the end of the day. When's the next one like September September and then when's and then when is November November. I always wait. I wish they did the majors like every other week for two months.

Yeah. Because I just get that you there's something about watching major golf. It's just so much fun and it just it sets up the weekend. So it's such a great couch activity for an entire weekend. Thrilling it. I want more. It threw off the nap schedule though. Like watching the PGA on a Sunday night on a Saturday night. You're like you know what I feel. I feel more tired than I usually do because I don't get my naps in the middle of the day. It's true. Anything else before we get to who's back. We have we'll talk about the bubble and Dane Lillard after Steve. Oh oh NFL mort went viral because 69 players opted out. Yep. He knew you know very nice more. I'm more probably 69s more definitely 69. I've got a joke I said I'm not going to make about more but it would have been

fun. Just know that for the record. That was big of you. Yeah. Thank you. Anything else. Oh there was a brawl in baseball. That was pretty cool. Yeah. Well the dude charged the dugout. You don't see that very often. By the way I think that that's bullshit. If you call a guy and you say come over and the guy starts running at you to fight you have to fight that guy. You can't rely on your sprung your spry young players to like catch the guy and intercept him on the way in and let them fight him. You you initiated the fight. You got to finish it now. I agree. I totally agree. So I guess just like let's have an MMA fight. Who was it was the manager right. Yeah. Of the Astros. Yes. Yeah. Listen to be like the bench coach. Yeah. Oh let that guy fight.

Just beefing. Just beefing. All right. Before we get to who's back we got a new ad alert. This is a big sponsor sponsor alert. Huge. Huge because it's Jimmy John. You don't steal it again. Jimmy John's Jimmy John's Jimmy John's Jimmy John's. So this is serendipity as they say because Jimmy John's is actually one of my favorite places to eat in the world. I'm telling you right now. Turkey Tom best turkey sandwich you never get the bread is so god damn good and Jimmy John's is now a sponsor. So I basically have reached final boss level. I feel so good having Jimmy John's back us and Jimmy John's is giving away some stuff for you guys. This week you can get 20% off any Jimmy John's order of ten dollars or more. Just use promo code

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We're giving you 20% off right now. Jimmy John's get Jimmy John's get the Italian nightclub. I think my record once I ordered Jimmy John's and I in my old apartment in Chicago I got it in like seven minutes. That's how fast and then one of the best parts about Jimmy John's you're done with a sandwich bonus pickle. Yeah here's a little tip for everyone there. When you order Jimmy John's for lunch is what I used to do. You get two sandwiches and then you get a slim for later. So you go three sandwiches really. That's the way to go. So go to Jimmy John's go use the app or go to jimmyjohns.com or Jimmy John's app. Take 20 you get 20% off. Take 20. 20% off see restriction to jimmyjohns.com. I actually before we did this ad I pulled up the menu just to do a little call

back. Turkey Tom like I said Turkey Tom and Vito do those two. You got to have a great day. That's it right there. That's it. It's it's a salami Capicola and provolone on the Vito and Turkey Tom is the best turkey sandwich ever. So go to Jimmy John's right now. Thank you Jimmy John's. All right Hank my who's back. I have a few. The first one is Phil Collins. Okay. Oh yeah. His song in the air tonight came out like God knows how many years ago. There was a viral video of two kids like reacting listening to it from the first time that had like a shit tone of millions of views and now in the air tonight is trending on the iTunes chart because it's like the top five. It's a jam. Yeah. And when you watch people watching or listening to that song for the

first time you still get the goosebumps when the drums kick in and you see them freak out. It's like a joy that I have is watching somebody start to appreciate something that we already know about. Yes. Yeah. Because you're like here comes here comes here comes kids are gonna be all right. Yeah. My other who's back the week is Derek Rose. Yeah. Okay. I know he is D Rose Kanye West tweeted out today some shoes model of new shoes that are releasing called the D Rose the Yeezy D roses and there's something. They are something. I don't know if it's like a shot at D Rose like I don't know what they are like. No I don't think so. I don't complete. So there's just a bunch of lines in it. I don't think so. I think I think you're thinking too much. I think

he's he just loves D Rose made a great shoe for D Rose. Oh it looks like it looks like a fish in a cartoon after they eat it. Yeah. You know what I'm saying. Like all the ribs. Yes. Yes. Yes. It's like a herringbone that's been struck by a cartoon cat. Yeah. And then throws the and then throws the the bones out. Yeah. I'm going to get them. How much is there as well. Probably. How much do you think they're going to be probably like 300 bucks. It looks like if somebody took a no one that's I mean it looks like there's no price that I wouldn't pay for turn to sperm into a Nike swoosh logo. Oh but speaking of which did you guys see Joanne beads shoes the Kyrie's. Oh my god. Listen I wear under armor shirts and stuff but those shoes what is under armor doing

with their shoes. Who's making under armor shoes. They're just Kyrie's there but they're also just the color way. I don't know who's making the flames. It looks like somebody ironed an emoji onto the side of it. I think what what under armor has been doing the last four years is they've just trying to been they've been trying to get the whole image of the chef Kyrie the nurse shoes. Yeah. Everybody's had by designing uglier and uglier shoes so we forget about that first. I think the under armor shoe designer just goes to Wal-Mart and sees like all the you know the $10 shoes that you can buy at Wal-Mart. Yeah. The starberries are there. Yeah. There's like a tag. He's like cool. I'm just going to model all my shoes off of this. Yeah. Those were something

something. Hey is that it. I had one more eSports are back. Okay. Oh great. Why. Recurring guest Nick Merks he like won this $100,000 tournament. It was I mean I know sports are back and like the feeling of watching sports is back but this this tournament was like basically the playoffs like it had that game seven playoff field playoff feel it was electric. It was the first time that I was watching something where I was like oh this is this is really sports like this is legitimately. Yeah. This is sports. Well at least one Blake won. The good thing the good thing PFT is that we had Nick Merks on and he explained how his dad at first was hesitant but then became accepting and we've just gone straight to accepting. Yeah. We love new lifestyle. Yes. We love you Hank. Right.

We'll support you. Love is love. I mean I think about it's not it's not on your brain. No it's just a who's back. I just wanted I just want you to be happy. Yeah. Whatever hard is life. Whatever you get that shirt you happy in life. That's what makes me right. Doesn't mean I'm necessarily going to be there watching you. I don't want to like watch you play. I don't want to see that image in my head. Right. I don't want to think about you just night and day just grabbing joysticks and stuff. I don't even play anymore. I don't know. I was just watching. Yeah. You officially retired. Focus on school. You're done. Play bar stool. Stool streams cod and teeny weenie Norman. Stool streams PMT teeny weenie. Oh we're

no way we're on that list. Yes. We're not on that list. No. Yeah. The pie chart. We're like seven. No the pie chart of my brain is like 50 percent PMT and the rest is split up. We're in there as long as it can fit into one of his other interests where it's like can maybe part of my take do stool streams or maybe do you guys want to call duty. Yeah. That's a dream. That's a dream. That's a pipe dream. Is that it Hank. That's it. OK. My who's back in the week is having to figure out your fantasy draft position for fantasy football because that is happening. Fantasy football drafts are probably going down in the next like two to three weeks I would imagine. So I'm starting to get those starting to get people here and there being like hey select my

fantasy draft order that sort of thing. So do you just want to like figure out a formula for it. I do that. I've yeah people have been tweeting me for like last three years to me like every I've been doing August all last year. I was actually replying to people. Tell them to come to me and then I just tell them to go to Jillie. OK. How about this. How about we could just come up with a formula for it. No I don't just tell just for them to me and I'll for them to Jillie. OK. So that's it's sweet. I'll tag Big Cat and then he'll send it to Jillie. No I did. I did a bunch of those last year and it was a big mistake because then everyone asked for it is like I don't I can't do this forever. But I'll do a couple. Well then you can just say

Madden codes. Yeah. And then get that I'll do a couple. I'll do a couple. But I'll send most to Jillie football. She's still out there. She's still doing her thing. My other who's back of the week is Thailand. Thailand's back. So Hank. Hank has accurately predicted pronunciations for Donald Trump on several occasions. So in the span of one week we had Thailand which Hank you said back in what 2017. Who knows. 2018. And then you had the other ones. Yosemite. Yep. Which Hank put on his list of unacceptable millennial names. See that wasn't even missed. That was just that was a name that I liked. Yeah. Right. And so he said Yosemite and then somebody tweeted at Big Cat. I hope he doesn't talk about women's health because he'll go object on it. So I don't know. Maybe

you could be president. You could be president. Congratulations. Of a brain. Oh what if he says super relatives. That would be something. I'm talking about Ivanka and Jared. I might never say super relatives again. It's a super relative. Honestly. I think super relatives is an upgrade over super relatives. Yes. Super anything. Yeah. We should actually do. Can we. I think you can petition Maryam Webster for new words. Didn't they make you like isn't slang becoming part of so we should just make super relative a real word now. Like irregardless. People. Yeah. If you say it enough it becomes part of your family. Super relative. Yeah reoccurring. Yeah. All right. My who's back is the man the myth of legend Mike Francesa who is retired. I think I don't even know

if he's retired or not. I think he just talks on a microphone for 20 minutes every day. And does he have an app like four people listen to it. And then what's his name. What's the guy's name. The clips all his stuff. Oh fun. Fun house clips it and puts it out and then we all laugh and it's great. Fun house should just pay Mike Francesa do a show for him. I don't want fun house ever to go anywhere. I want him to keep finding ways to just clip Mike Francesa like going to the refrigerator in the morning and farting. So he he gave like another eulogy. You have a great eulogy for Horace Clark who was a member of the New York Yankees. He said Horace Clark was a symbol the Yankees fall from grace post 1964. He was mediocre just like the

bomber 65 through 74. Rest in peace. Rest in peace at the end is so perfect. I like how he didn't even include the fact that he passed away because most people that are reading this probably didn't know that this guy from the 1964 Yankees died. Yes. But then dropping the RIP at the end. It's like a Deion dropping the hashtag truth at the end of it. Right. I never had any thoughts about Horace Clark but now I know he was mediocre. Well I know that he was symbolic most of all of the mediocre Yankees in those years went down to mediocrity. All right Billy what's your who's back. My who's back of the week is fear. The murder hornets are actually a problem. You really have run out of things to talk about. No they're actually they're in England now. Okay. They're

in England. They just skipped the United States. They're in England. They've spread. I'm actually scared. How many murders have they committed. They've committed zero murders. Oh wow. Shit. Sounded pretty scary. They're actually murdering other pollinators in the area such as honeybees. Flowers. Flowers. So yeah. But I thought they were going to invade the United States. Well they're currently still invading us. But we have guns in the United States. Yeah murder hornets are like fuck that let's go to England. Yeah. Yeah. Strength and no college football. So we got a lot of time on our hands. Oh you know be sick. What about demolition derbies where the South just started doing demolition derbies again on Saturdays. I've been in a demolition

derby. It sucks. They're the best. I fucked up my ribs real bad. Geez. I got smashed right away. It was fun though. So murder hornets back. Yeah. Fear. Fear is back. Just. You had five days to come up with a topic we already talked about. You didn't talk about them going to England. And then two months ago. They didn't murder anyone though. They're like call me when they murder someone. Yeah who's scared of someone that doesn't murder. Right. Not me. It'd be like oh check out this serial killer. How many people has he killed zero. But he wants to. But he wants to kill everybody. He's thinking about it. Well it's too much of a bitch to actually do it. Yeah. They're just hornets. They actually

that's the problem. They're hornets. You don't get to be called murder hornets until you murder someone. Wait. How do hornets fly all the way. Actually no they haven't murdered people. Who. They've they've killed 50 people. You just came up with that on top of your head. I think they kill like 10 a year in Japan. But those are just people who are allergic to hornets and then they get stung. Oh that's natural selection. That's like being like oh yeah there's this new thing out there murder peanut butter. It kills 20 people a year with peanut butter allergies. What about these murder cars. Yeah murder Jiffy. Don't go near it. What about murder electricity or murder water. Have you heard about murder water Billy. Everyone who drinks it dies. Yeah everyone who drinks water

dies. If you try to win a Wii game system from a radio show it usually kills you if you drink too much of it. Okay. That's like a good one. All right let's get to our interview. Awesome interview coming up Steve. Oh we're so excited for this one. I don't think I've ever laughed as hard as I have in this interview coming up before we do that. Whoop. You know everything about how your favorite team is dealing with the pandemic. But do you know enough about you. Whoop is a 24 seven health and fitness tracker that changes that by monitoring critical daily metrics like sleep recovery and strain. We've been wearing our bands for a couple of months now and it's been awesome to track our sleep and activity during quarantine. Whether you're

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with whoop today i love wearing my whoop get in tune with your body go right now use code take a check out 15 off whoop dot com do it do it do it okay here is steve okay we now welcome on very special guest uh you know him very well it is steve of jackass fame and many other things he's got a new comedy special out on his website called gnarly steve o dot com go to it right now it's comedy stand-up comedy it's clips it's special appearances from some of the jackass crew he's also got a podcast called steve's wild ride steve oh thank you very much for joining us we are big big fans uh i guess it's kind of a heavy first question but i i actually am very curious what your response would be um huge fans of jackass we're in the perfect age demographic we're both 35

years old so it was like hit at the right spot what to you what is the genius of jackass because i truly do think it's a genius it was a genius thing and you guys are all comedic geniuses and people maybe poo poo it and say no they're idiots no they're comedic geniuses so why uh like what's the genius behind it all right uh well thank you number one i don't uh i think that's uh very kind i appreciate the kind of words uh number two i don't think it's really a heavy question i think it's really fascinating um because there was some kind of a cultural significance to jackass i think that's safe to say and what made it popular i would believe is that the the misfortune element i think that there's something compelling about uh slowing down to google at an accident

i think that seeing seeing something i think maybe sort of terrible happened is that inherently compelling i think that um there's something endearing about jackass and where we were able to uh we've always been able to not look cool to not take ourselves seriously and i think there's something endearing about that and there's also finally something i believe actually pretty wholesome about the fact that there's nothing mean spirited in what we're doing you know yeah we're reckless where we do terrible things to ourselves and to each other but we're never cruel to uh to third parties or to anybody else so you know it's weird to say jackass is wholesome but i think it does apply and uh has that road rambling a lot and it makes a lot of

i think you hit the nail on the head i've always said that with jackass it's one of those things that you could take it's like a great unifier you could take uh the first jackass movie for example play it for some teenagers in the suburbs you could play it for a tribe that hasn't even been discovered yet in south america you could play it for probably even ices overseas and everybody that would watch it would laugh it is like the the perfect comedy that i think is really universal so i guess my question for you is who is uh who is like the weirdest person or the most unexpected person or group of people that have told you like i love jackass ah

i mean it wasn't somebody who said that uh they loved it but i remember being really caught off guard one night at a restaurant in new york city and uh somebody said sheepishly sort of hey excuse me i'm really sorry to bother you but uh would you mind saying hi to maybe my niece or my granddaughter or something like that and it was robin williams oh i remember the thing yeah i remember thinking wow do you robin williams and he was just so polite and really like uh a little bit timid even um but as far as people who were uh like unlikely fans mean i'm just i'm always shocked i feel like the guy from daston confused matthew mcconaughey's character where he says i get older and they just stay the same age because it's shocking how like all these years later literally

we're decades into it now and like little kids that are interested like like how is a little kid like a fan of jackass you know like uh and then even like on the older side like when i'm doing my tour yeah like in the audience and uh to see like legitimately old people it always makes me really happy what about yeah what about your parents did like the cast members did their parents ever like say hey we're fans of this because i gotta imagine that like looking at your child doing that it might hit a little bit differently as opposed to watching somebody else's kid do it i don't know that anybody in my family has ever been particularly a fan of it i think they uh they recognize the uh the appeal but it's just not their kind of thing um i know bam's uh family

his parents have been really like intimately involved in it yep um yeah i don't know i don't know that um i think that the closer you get to it the the less i'm a fan you are you know particularly if you're really like if it's if it's a family member someone you love like doing this stuff i i think you would have a mixed mixed bag of feelings about it so i liked your answer about why jackass is genius but i i feel like you might have missed something that at least i you know when i watch it i see and you could tell me i'm way wrong but i think it is also just friendship like you guys okay always came across as yeah you'd fight or there'd be fucked up things you do to each other but you'd always make each other laugh and when you make each other laugh it like

kind of fills the room of like oh my god they're having a great time and you could tell me i'm way off but did it i didn't feel like that that's absolutely a component to it um and i think that that i would lump that in with the what makes it uh you know a little bit of an unlikely wholesome thing that uh that would not mean spirited that we evidently really care about each other and we've got this great chemistry where uh you know where there's there's just some kind of like something magical about it right right and it is yeah go ahead sorry sorry no that's my bad that's my bad i don't know i i'm the worst when it comes to that i'm the worst well i was gonna give an example it's like so you know the the when you boil down like you know guys being friends and male

friendship and it's like yeah you care about each other but also if one of your friends you know bam is deathly afraid of snakes you're gonna fuck him up and lock him into a horse trailer and throw fake snakes at him like that's that's kind of where it always felt so funny and so relatable you know i'm never throwing snakes at my friends but that feeling of like we can be friends but i also can bust your balls and like go at you every now and then at the end of the day we're still friends for sure yeah it's uh that busting balls is really what it is you know there's a certain type of um yeah there's a certain type of i suppose you know razzing whatever that you would only do to someone you really care about so off that though what was

there ever a time where one of the guys took it too far or it was like true anger that lasted a few days and it was like oh shit like we went too far on this one uh yeah um where uh bam broke my nose okay that was uh that that fucking drove me nuts i was so pissed and the footage never even uh was even included in the movie thank god i uh thank god i put it in my gnarly comedy special you know this this fucking terrible this terrible uh yeah filthy thing that i've put together um yeah it was bam doing his um throw water in your face and then super slow most sucker punch you and he just he just he was called the rocky and they would play it like the rocky theme music um and uh he just there's supposed to be no drinking on the set you know this is like out of um

out of some like respect for my sobriety when we filmed jackass through d i was newly sober and uh they had a strict no drinking policy but bams went and got fucking completely hammered on the set and and and came up and threw the water in my face and uh sucker punched me but he just completely fucking broke my nose the worst thing about it was it wasn't even in front of the fucking slow motion camera you know drunk drunk ass shithead fucking broke my nose in the wrong place yeah i'm all about getting footage but uh but yeah so you know i mean it was it was captured on film but it wasn't captured on that fantastic phantom slow motion camera so uh as part of this gnarly special i went and just filmed all kinds of crazy new stuff to load into it so that

it would play largely like a jackass movie i exacted my revenge on bam by throwing the water in his face and uh god i was mortified to learn what a pussy i am when it comes to punching people oh that's awesome uh so yeah so with your new stand-up thing you just mentioned what are you 10 years sober right now well yeah i just passed 12 years in march thank you that's awesome so i have to imagine that that was a pretty big transition for you going from you know filming jackass the way that used to be filmed where i'm sure there were you know drugs and alcohol on set everywhere to now there's been you know absolutely none for you for the last like 12 years uh what was the like most difficult part of making that adjustment and do you think that you've learned anything

over the last 12 years has actually improved your comedy since then ah man um the uh the transition like i mean when you get sober it's like you know you only change one thing like and that's everything it's just like it's really you know i was um in uh psychiatric wards and and rehab centers for the first six months and then i was in a halfway house you know uh until i had two years of sobriety so i was just straight institutionalized for two entire years and i was still in the halfway house when we were filming jackass 3d i had a roommate you know i shared my room with we had to do our chores scrubbing the toilets and this and that and i would have to like get a special pass filled out like hey i'm gonna be late for curvy tonight

because i have to go and get catapulted into the sky and a porta potty full of shit you know that was like actual like conversations that went on with my house manager in my halfway house and uh so yeah i mean there was a big transition and ultimately like when it comes to approaching like gnarly you know dangerous painful stunts um i just learned that uh you know you take away the drugs and the alcohol from the wasted attention whore and then you get a sober attention whore you know it's like really that's all there is to it i never got i never took painkillers for pain and uh i never uh did stunts because i was loaded i just i'm just an attention whore so you know i it didn't really um it didn't really change my approach to what i do for entertainment

interesting i was reading a little bit about your childhood and whatever's on wikipedia is what i absorb so there's probably a bunch of stuff that's incorrect on there but it did say that you moved around a lot as a kid like a ton yeah not just like different cities but like different states different countries it was like almost once a year once every other year is that how you kind of developed a sense of humor to to fit in with new places that you were just moving into for the first time i would like to say that that's true um i uh i was born in england spoke my first words in brazil uh speaking portuguese in brazil um i i i i spoke fluent spanish in nursery school in venezuela kindergarten i did in kinetic and uh and i moved back to england and to canada i grew up

in five different countries and it was always we're gonna move again and um i remember always every time i found out we were gonna move i was just stoked because i was such like a fucking bouncing off the walls just like super annoying like uncomfortable like that like i uh i didn't win anybody over you know and i was always like stoked to move again because i i thought cool i'm gonna get a a new shot you know a clean slate and this time i'm gonna be cool and then every time you know there i was and i did it all over again so i don't know that i'd learned anything from from moving around uh ultimately later in life you know that whole nature about me would it would end up kind of working out but it did not work for me when i was a

child it didn't at all when you were a kid did you have did you always know you had like a high uh threshold for pain and doing dumb stuff like were you just not did you know from like a very early age you just had no fear because a lot of the stuff you've done it's like how the fuck is he doing this yeah i don't even know that i have that much of a high threshold for pain i mean i suppose like you do you do i i've developed you know i've developed uh an ability to just take it on you know um but i feel everything and i i can't even say that uh that i'm fearless i'm just that much of an attention board you know it's just that simple like and when i think of uh i'm the pain involved in the stuff that i do like what what the pain i really couldn't withstand would be like

the nine to five job you know right that's a real pain going to going going going to work to do something that i'm not psyched about like that that's some pain that i can't fuck with yeah so who who in the crew i think i know the answer but who in the crew does have the highest threshold for pain i saw noxial do something that would have been that really changed my my view uh i was like wow like i i i i recently saw noxial do something that i indicated to me that he actually has registers pain differently than uh some of the other ones of us so i'm gonna go with noxial based on that he he does something that is so funny in i you never see it anywhere but when he's doing something super painful he starts to laugh beforehand and you're like what the fuck

is wrong with this guy like he's about to get smoked in the nuts and or like tackled 100 miles an hour by three football players and he's giggling to himself beforehand right yeah i mean he's he's the gnarliest you know like i've heard people say that i take on the you know the the worst of the challenges in this nap but like i don't see it that way i think that noxial and the stunts that he does i mean are just so messed up particularly because a lot of us grew up on skateboards you know like we actually like spent our our you know formative years like learning how to fall yeah and um noxial doesn't have any of that benefit of uh you know experience with falling and and uh coordination you know working on it like when noxial gets on a skateboard like boom yeah i mean he really

doesn't know how to fall so when he does it's uh catastrophic yeah i think one of the things i like the most about when i think you in particular are awesome about this but when you're about to do something that you should be afraid of we can see your fear you're not trying to play cool and be like i'm brave i can do this you step up to the sun you're like oh fuck this is stupid dude dude what am i doing what am i doing but you do it anyways yeah you're still there you're still there and you still end up like locking that part out and you're like i have this fear uh but that's fine i'm gonna do it even though i'm afraid has there ever been like a stunt that you approach that you know you're all set up ready to film and you're like this is fucked this is fucked and you back out of at the

last second there was one in uh when we were in india i was supposed to ride a unicycle along like like a balance beam style plank and um it was over a bed of hot coals so like i would and um okay and that broke my heart man because there was like in setting up this whole bed of hot coals there was like a lot of like work there went into it you know and building the beam and the whole setup of this thing and then when i got on the beam there was just some kind of mental block where i couldn't get both feet on the pedals i just like completely shut down and uh and totally went out and it wasn't because i was afraid of landing on the the hot coals it was just i was afraid to commit to that unicycle on the beam um so yeah that one uh didn't happen it absolutely

crushed my spirit that i went out and then uh you know years later we did the the fire gauntlet as a redemption for that and uh it would have been way cooler in india with actual hot coals on the unicycle than the way the fire gauntlet played out how how did you guys uh decide who did what stunt and was it just whoever thought of it or was it like no this person would be perfect for this and is there like a pecking order or a competition for it well it depends like uh first and foremost i wouldn't say that like there is a respect for intellectual property like whoever comes up with an idea is gonna like essentially own that idea you know um so if you see somebody doing and if you see somebody doing a stunt you can presume that either they came up

with the idea or they were granted permission to carry out the idea by the person who did come up with it and uh so you've got dibs on anything if it's your idea now of course a lot of the time it makes sense oh this should be great for this guy to do it so there are ideas getting uh you know like written for certain people and then there's a whole other category of idea which is like the undeniably funny thing that absolutely nobody wants to do and for those ideas you know everybody gets approached and then you know assuming everybody turns it down it trickles down to uh danger erin yes yes and he always like loses a tooth or something pretty much yeah yeah pretty pretty much that that's sort of like how uh how that goes he he's underrated

yeah because just seeing his face whenever he's like fuck dude i don't want to do this it's just like that's so funny to know that that's exactly how it happened like it actually was passed by everyone so when he's saying fuck why am i doing this i don't want to do this it's as genuine as it could be y'all i'll give you guys a crazy jackass secret which said which makes no sense because i'm actually gonna make a video about it but uh the um um the jet the the lambo tooth pull yeah which was part of um jackass 3d uh it made no fucking sense to pull that tooth from danger erin it was like for danger erin it was a totally healthy tooth it made no fucking sense to do that plus when they pulled out that tooth on danger erin because

it was a healthy tooth sure they loosened it up a bit but it fractured this fucking skull where you know like the little fucking uh you know whatever the tooth fits in like that shit broke like up to his nose and um the thing about it was there was a redo because back on the the previous movie don vito bam's uncle don vito had his teeth fucking falling out like crazy i think he was down to like one tooth left and uh that one remaining tooth was begging to fall out like and and what bam said to don vito was let me tie that one fucking tooth to my Lamborghini and film it for the movie and if you let me do that then i'll i'll pay for you to get like proper dentures don vito lept at the opportunity

and they did it and it was classic but then don vito got tangled up in some fucking uh like lewd shit with uh with miners you know like he was at uh became a sex offender yeah and and when don vito became a sex offender they scrubbed him out of uh out of jack jack guys number two so they had to scrap that bit but the thing was the director was just so in love with it that uh he couldn't let it go and so it was it was completely appropriate to do that with don vito but the director it broke jeb tremendous heart to to see that go it was so important to him to to fucking let that finally see the light of day that idea then that was one where hey you want to do this nope nope so i trickled down to danger erin and they did it with a healthy tooth

so jeff seems like he gets he gets away pretty easy with a lot of the stuff because he's around he gets to witness a lot of it and you guys obviously prank him a little bit behind the scenes but he never actually has to do any of the things that he sets up and directs have you guys thought about like including him and being like hey if you're going to make so much money filming us maybe we get you a couple times yeah i mean there's nobody's safe on the set man like i mean nobody's ever going to be safe on the set but as far as like really elaborate you know big things at jeff's expense um i don't uh i don't know man i think um i think jeff is uh not necessarily quite the type of attention horror i mean it's all it is just a big battle for screen time you know and so

part of me thinks like why would we do that to jeff you know like we want the screen time for ourselves and i don't know um i don't know i want to know how one one stunt one of my favorite it's very underrated not like one of your most remarkable stunts but i every time i watch it i die die laughing is wasabi snooters nope nope i'll go here you want to guess it's not it's not a pain stunt ah it's not a pain so i don't have the goldfish no it's uh it's fart mask when Preston when Preston pooped into the fucking beer bong uh because he was trying to fart so bad and you started puking in the in the mask what you guys are really you guys are really committing to this one man we are so alienating anybody i don't care dude i don't care i i was looking through i was looking through

my tweets before this and i i found a tweet from like from three years ago and i remember i was high with all my friends and it just says i watched jackass two last night and i missed those guys so much so like i'll keep doing that every year where i'll just watch jackass and be like fuck i love these guys well dude i'm so thrilled that i that i got the fucking whole jackass gang together for this uh gnarly thing i don't know if you guys saw like even in the trailer but dude the whole fucking gang Knoxville bam Pontius Dave England danger and everybody and they duct tape me to the side of a fucking billboard truck and uh and then drive the fucking thing down the highway with me duct taped inside of it and and that's that's how i get to the theater in the opening sequence of

this multimedia comedy special and uh so yeah it's pretty it's it's a point of pride and and uh and honor for me that uh that i got the whole fucking gang together i'm so grateful to those guys but yeah there is new shit from us jackass dudes and it is at stevo.com so um but with that said yeah the fart mask thing yeah uh for anybody's not familiar the idea was to uh like set up like uh what was connected to Preston's like a 350 pound fat guy yeah there's like a tube connected to his asshole it was a beer bomb it was a beer bomb that was basically going to one of those old timey scuba diving masks that's like you can see all the way around that's like glass right and and uh you know it was always like uh it was always like a payoff for a bit if it made me barf yes and um

the thing is that like there's no way that i actually could have smelled a fart that came through that whole tube but just the setup and preparing to do it like the idea of it you know i have this like super like powerful imagination which is why i think uh over the years i was always such a uh an embarrassing premature ejaculation guy you know like totally premature ejaculating my whole life because like the idea of something being fucking sexy would just make me come much the way the idea the idea of something being gross would just make me barf you know i really think there's a link between those two things and uh and so just yeah yeah i mean i've got this big mask on and Preston basically just puts the beer bomb up to his butt and i'm like the idea of it

and i'm already barfing uh he did end up taking a shit into that beer box too because he tried to fart so hard that he shit into the beer box i sound so stupid it's so fucking funny dude you know what just just i remembered is that we had to film that twice we had to film that twice because the the first time they set it all up i fucking barfed before he got his pants down like they're like they're like they're like fuck they were so mad like fucking stevo dude fucking you know i've ruined the i've ruined it because we didn't even get to start the bit and i already fucking barf so so we did we did it like another day we redid it oh that's awesome oh man i i always used to love um when manny would come out when manny would be included in

a script yeah and many manny manny just recovered from covid oh shit i'm glad he's all right he he got it bad man he was talking about like it was like so dehydrated like it brought on kidney stones i think he said and like dude he was just not okay but thankfully he's uh you know he's bounced back that's awesome so so many if you don't know was their wildlife guy he was like your your nature expert he wore the shark tooth necklace did he actually is he actually a wildlife expert or see because like because he would come on set and and he'd be like yeah just go swim in the bottom of this lake and grab an alligator by its face and that's fine and i i never knew if he actually had a background with animals or if he was just there to like serve as the nature guide

he's he's like like a real life tarzan you know like i mean it's just like like tarzan never had a degree but it was tarzan like like manny really is tarzan i would say um i mean i don't think manny ever went to school at all like when uh the story was that i think in cuba i believe manny was from cuba and uh he'd show up in school and um just ditch and he would like go out into this like into the swamp to survive you know for like days on end like when he was a school kid and that was just his deal like growing up like throughout life like uh just fascinated with uh you know apex predators and wanting to like get intimate with them that's awesome yeah he's uh man so are you guys i always said too i always said that uh you know if manny says something like uh like don't do

something that means fucking don't do it you know but if manny says something's totally okay that does not fucking mean it's okay either like when i did the alligator tightrope and i just included this in a youtube video i was telling the story about this in a recent video like manny's advice for me going into the alligator tightrope he says if an alligator gets a hold of stevo stevo will relax and hopefully the alligator will release him that's like dude you know she didn't go to school for that like the best fucking thing that's ever been said on jackoff stevo will relax he will let the alligator

take him and hopefully the alligator will release him i love it we're going to get back to stevo real quick but before we do i want to talk to you about three chi you've heard us talk about three chi on this show before you might know it as being the delta eight federally legal version of thc it's made here in the us with us grown hemp all their products are formulated by a biochemist and when they released the delta eight products they were the first federally legal thc products sold in the usa since prohibition started almost 90 years ago their effects are perfect hybrid of cbd and the delta nine thc that you might use and it gives you a similar buzz and all the medicinal effects of normal thc without the laziness without the anxiety without the paranoia you don't have

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three chi.com that's three chi.com and at retailers around the country you have to be 21 to purchase and we're going to give you a special five percent discount go to three chi.com it's the number three chi.com get your vapes your gummies your tinctures your oils you can make your own homemade edibles with them yum cook up a bunch of brownies with three chi you're going to have a great great evening if you do but remember start small figure out how you handle it and then you can increase it might knock you off your feet so start with like a half gummy or something like that you have to be 21 to purchase check them out at three chi.com use promo code PMT at checkout get five percent off your order and now more stevo when you're trying to translate all this stuff that

you know in in jackass you did most of it outdoors or at least in a place that had you know like a lot of room around you to work with and a lot of interactive stuff going on you're trying to do it on stage how do you have to kind of like narrow that the idea of the joke down enough for it to be funny for somebody that's sitting like in the back row as opposed to somebody that's in the front row I mean I don't know it uh there's plenty of stuff that we did on jackass that that didn't require uh you know a great deal of space um and uh when it comes to like really doing like heavy stunts on stage um that's not like what I do routinely on my whole tour you know like when it's time to do like I had all the jackass guys come to the taping of the gnarly specials

so they would come out on stage and do some like fucking massive stunt which was like blocked out and shot for the special um I think that everybody's able to see who is in attendance but yeah like for the for that purpose we were filming like uh like a show essentially um but uh but yeah dude like when jackass first came out um there was uh like the director Jeff Tremaine like he let me know that the that the pilot got ordered to series he said yeah it's not a pilot anymore we got like eight episodes and so I need you to take all of your video and send it in so that we can license it and put it right onto the show and I sent in all the shit that I had and uh then I followed up and I was like yo like what are you using and he was like man like not one

fucking clip you sent in is allowed on tv he's like because MTV was really touchy about fire and my rule was always like no matter what you do it's cooler if you're on fire so I was always on fire so that ruled out a ton of footage they had another rule they had another rule that was uh that was that um if you're gonna jump off something you know it can't be above a certain height and I mean I was like constantly jumping on shit that was way too tall while I was on fire I was like I was like Bayland Stanton and uh speaking of fire like the the grand finale of the gnarly special I got burned so fucking bad I had to have skin grafts on 15 percent of my body like it's the worst fucking injury the most painful situation I have ever been in my life and

thank god it's finally out all right so yeah again check that out but um so so when when Jeff Germain told me that nothing was allowed on tv I was legitimately worried like what's kind of fucking pussy ass show is this you know I got actually concerned that uh it was gonna be like like you know so watered down that it wasn't like there wasn't intense and then of course we we figured our way around all their rules but uh out of the gate I knew that I had like a wealth of footage that I could distribute on my own at that time every night on tv it was like girls gone wild like caught on tape there were these like you know two hot for tv videos and I was like man I'm gonna make my own two hot for tv videos which I totally did and I also like put together a whole

fucking tour where essentially I would come out on stage get all fucked up and uh and walk everybody through what you're not allowed to do on tv you know that was the whole show and whenever I promoted it I I promised I said I will be drunk and on drugs or your money back which I was so proud and uh so yeah that was like kind of the deal and man I like it was those days were something else man those days are something else but as far as to answer the question what's it like doing the shit on the stage nothing stopped us man yeah that stage was covered in blood barf piss fucking every night man at the time we would be doing the show at universities where we would be like wiping out their student council a lot of entertainment funds by pissing and bleeding

and barfing like all over the stage and then just fucking trying to hump as many of their students as possible um this is this has been awesome Steve uh I had one last question it's the me on these soft question of the day your podcast right so you probably you know about this stuff yeah I haven't I haven't done me on these yet I don't know why but uh but yeah dude I love it and I love being on the podcast bandwagon I also saw you guys on TMZ and uh yeah just fucking congrats man it's crazy I don't even really remember that they cut they cut out too much of a because we started giving Harvey shit we started quoting how much money he was worth and being like hey do you want it we're like dude it looks like you're worth 20 million dollars on

google here like how much are you gonna give to the kids yeah I don't know if that's it or not but he got that sounds that sounds to me a little light a little light but he was like what the hell that sounds I think that sounds considerably light for Harvey Levin yeah and then we just started shaming him we're like all right so we're gonna put you down for zero dollars for the kids so like do you want to tell the kids you want to go to the hospital and tell the kids you're not gonna be giving money they cut back but to his credit he donated yes he didn't tell anybody he donated yes but yeah I mean trust me trust me you don't want to like feud with TMZ no he was very nice he hit us up right after and he was like tell me where to donate I will donate

so a shout out to him I love it but uh I love it and then the last time I saw him uh I was like uh he complimented me on uh he said man you look great dude so much better than bam something like that but yeah I've always had I've always had a pretty good relationship with TMZ and that's where I get my news you know like fuck anybody fuck anybody who says that TMZ is is uh like tabloid trash because dude they're in their journalistic integrity is so solid that uh you know they don't get anything wrong yeah no it's true they don't and Harvey did it he donated after the fact and didn't make a big deal of it which I appreciate it even more so all right the me undies question go to me undies.com slash PMT to get 15% off your first purchase me undies.com

slash PMT to get 15% off your first purchase jackass four is it happening is it fully happening have you guys already filmed a bunch of stuff? We were one week into production when uh when shit got shut down but that's actually a good thing because that week was so fucking explosive that uh we went from like the like should these guys really be doing this you know it was just kind of a fucking mistake at this point they're like some of them are 50 now right like and in that one week we proved ourselves like I mean it was like there was the fucking heaviest week and we got like just this footage where like now Paramount sees it like they're behind it like we're like they're you know when the world starts spinning again we're as big of a priority for Paramount

pictures as uh as there is from what I gather. Hell yeah the lone-wielding laughter at that point for sure. Listen that okay that puts a smile on my face knowing that it's it's still gonna happen it's gonna happen even better but it's check out this fucking pisser check out this fucking kicking the balls during that one week while on the set my agent calls me up and uh and he's like hey look man I just kind of let you know that you're selling out like your uh all of your comedy club gigs you know so far in advance now it no longer makes sense to me to entertain any comedy club offers so congratulations you have officially graduated to theaters whoa there you go and I'm like I'm like Brad fucking booking an international theater tour like not and then everything stopped yeah

everything stopped everything stopped then I started the podcast and uh I set up a distribution for this gnarly comedy special dude I mean I'll give you a spoiler from my comedy special the gnarly thing like it's not just stand-up comedy like I did all kinds of new stunts and one of them not only did I swallow an entire load of Chris Pontius's cum but I did it I did it right in front of my father oh wait you just like took a shot to the mouth or what I mean he he blasted a huge load into a condom in the bathroom he jacked off and then he tied it in the knot I brought it out and handed it to me in front of my dad see this is yeah this is where go ahead sorry sorry go ahead say what my dad my dad's notoriously not cool with the like the gay humor I remember my dad

with my dad was like why is this the right thing to do and I said oh I said uh I said dad I'm not doing this to hurt you he says you're not gonna hurt me you're gonna piss me off it's it's funny that we we talked about like what your parents reaction to all this stuff and everyone's parents reaction and showing how different of a world it is that you ate Chris Pontius's cum in front of your dad and it was like yeah that's what I did and when you say that line I think all of us in this room are thinking our dads listen to this show and they're gonna be like what the fuck was that interview yeah and we didn't eat any right right I mean that's where the bar is at the way I look at it and I was really pleased to have like officially fucking raised it and thank you guys for

letting me uh get you know get so many shameless plugs in there and let everybody know that it's live right now on stevo.com and I did I invested more fucking I spent like 300 grand making that thing go watch it right go watch it I need I need people to go order it you know he tried to come for it you ain't come for that should be just like I did that should be the line when you go to stevo.com like I come to make this fucking yeah and I went on a burn unit tour yeah we do owe it to you to watch this thing the amount of punishment that your scrotum has taken over the year alone I think should be worth everybody going out there to watch it yeah do you think can you have kids yeah I got a vasectomy dude like uh I was one of my ideas I was sitting on for the longest time

vasectomy olympics is that wait that's separate from when you stapled your nutsack to your leg yeah right yeah that's a new one that's that's in the can do you know I'll give you guys another one I'm just giving up giving shit up like uh check out all the needle marks in my back uh okay uh am I blocking it yeah I'm blocking it okay I don't know if you can see like I had uh yeah I had a spinal cavity injection fucking to uh it's a drug called chloroprocane and totally illegally this guy fucking and put the needle into my like four inches into my spinal cavity like it was so deep in there he plunges it full of this drug which renders my uh my whole

lower half completely paralyzed that's what it was supposed to do so he plunges it in he's like all right go and and I just take off sprinting right and I'm like fucking sprinting laps back and forth until my fucking I can feel it and I'm just like stomping and staggering trying not to go down and then I fucking collapsed and and not only was my lower half paralyzed but I couldn't feel anything up to my neck and I was like yo dude I can't fucking breathe I was like I'm having a lot of trouble breathing I thought I was fucking dying so bad add up and then my and then my career starts fucking lighten up my legs with paintballs and stun guns and lighters it's fun if you're on fire you said that yourself right and I mean dude fucking uh it was like I mean

paintballs have been kind of played out over the years but it's never been like so weirdly fascinating where there's just no reaction yeah the biggest reaction there was at him it was like just shooting a dead body it literally looked like I was just shooting a dead body and the only time I really really reacted was when uh when they lifted up my legs because I couldn't tell they were fucking doing anything all of a sudden I could see my feet up in the air and like it shocked the shit out of me to see my feet because I couldn't tell what was going on and then all my uh all my wounds my bullet holes we smeared tattoo ink so uh hopefully I got some like uh it was like a Takashi six nine shootout because uh we did like all rainbow colored fucking ink smeared on these

point blank paintball wounds oh my god dude so you say that you're like giving away spoilers I actually think that people are gonna want to watch it yes you have to watch that that's kind of the beauty of it like you can spoil jackass well right it just makes you want to watch it even more than you did before sure the thing about that one is that we only filmed it this past weekend and that's going to be in the follow-up to gnarly perfect which um but yeah gnarly's loaded with there's plenty loaded into gnarly like I'm not I'm not I will not waste anybody's time who goes to stevo.com to check it out I mean go and just look at the trailer like it's so fucked up I love it what's what's the insurance like on on the set of jackass will anybody actually give you like liability

shit I don't know dude I don't know I remember uh after we filmed jackass 3d I was already sober and that was the first time we're going into it I said hey what happens if somebody gets like really hurt or killed and uh I had never asked that before and uh and they said oh uh workman's comp laws the californian workman's comp laws apply you're like oh that's good enough answer for me time off for the funeral he could have said anything Jesus that that sounded to me so funny and and already I got some workman's comp going on for jackass 4d that first week I got like a hospitalized like a motherfucker and I can't give I can't give away what it was but uh

I broke my own rules you know like I I go into this the last one in this one and I and my rule is I don't want to be fucking paralyzed I don't want to be fucking killed and I actually added I don't want to be fucking brain trauma yeah and uh I'm one weekend and I actually said to the camera going into this stunt I was like man I had these rules fucking no spinal no brain no death and we're not even one weekend and I I picked the wrong week to fucking quit doing all that shit and I should sure enough half an hour later I fucking wake up uh on the stretcher in the ambulance oh I'm excited man I woke I woke up on the stretcher being like uh about to be loaded into the ambulance and then I and then I went out again

and I came to like being like out of the I don't know it was fucking that first week of filming was handy and uh and and like there's full confidence for me that uh that it's gonna be a hit I I love it I'm excited I can't wait to watch your special as well it's gonna be awesome yes well stevo thank you so much uh go to stevo.com do it right now go to stevo.com buy the uh gnarly special also listen to his podcast this has been awesome man next time you're in New York City we'd love to have you come by our studio yeah I love it congratulations on the meteoric success of your podcast and uh and thank you for being so kind to me to alienate such a large portion of your audience it doesn't know about it doesn't know about or care about jackass it's

been a real honor man thank you guys I appreciate it all right stevo thanks so much also can I can I just say hearing you say dude I think you have the best dude in the world oh well thanks man yeah all right man thanks so much that interview with stevo is brought to you by our friends at norton 360 with life lock in these challenging times it's amazing that we can stay so connected you've probably been relying on your wi-fi connections more than usual between working from home shopping online binge watching stuff on your devices your private information is now more exposed than it's ever been and cyber criminals keep finding new ways to take it a lot of people don't stop to think about this problem until

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to norton.com slash pmt that's norton.com slash pmt and you're going to get 25 percent off your first year at norton.com slash pmt okay let's get some segments finish up the show we forgot to talk about hockey hockey is back yeah congrats thank you blackhawks it's always good to have playoff hockey i know you could have gotten the first overall pick but you know what would you rather have like a week and a half of a combination of misery and pain and maybe a couple glimpses of awesomeness now or would you rather wait four years to maybe have a good player i would take the immediate gratification every single time i also have tricked myself because it is taz and kane i'm like okay well they could just do it they could do it and i should have done retroactive

who's back who's back is furiously googling and checking on twitter for the playoff schedule i've been looking for it everywhere where is it give me the playoff schedule i need to plan the rest of my next two weeks around when the blackhawks play so give it to me give it to me give it to me also the washington capitol has defeated the bruins in the first round of the playoffs that ensured seating so hank has to play third yeah they're third instead of fourth seat so they islanders they have to play the islanders uh we're going to berelli's hank has to play against the hurricanes but you're fine with that right because you remember that pig that they had last year they should have killed that pig when the hurricanes lost agreed i stand by that you can't have a rally pig

and then when they lose be like oh yeah now the rally pig gets to just live and you can't bring a pig back because right if you bring that same pig back last year i'm going to be the first person to start like circling patches on it's going to be like that's a different pig kill the pig listen that's just that's just how it works can't just be like we're going to ride the pigs momentum oh whoops we died pig gets a lift all right uh this league we got a lot of this league damian lured versus the clippers was an ultimate this league moment so dame missed two free throws the end of the game patrick beverly uh was not playing and just clowning on before that happened dame lured hit a three yes was like pointing at pat beverly being like i want you yes yes and so pat

beverly was was sitting out the game they were just clowning on him in the empty gym just yelling at him uh afterwards they interviewed damian lillard and were like how do you feel about it and he's like it's a sign of respect i've sent pat beverly home uh before i've sent paul george home before that seems to be the end of it nope then paul george then did took it to instagram which is like the full circle for this league i'm getting exhausted just explaining this and instagram is the new tehmacula it was like you guys are you guys are you want to see me on these igc's called them chomps uh basically yeah they got into going back and forth with each other i would not fuck with damian lillard or pat beverly actually yeah like fucking with pat beverly

on the court that's like walking outside in a lightning storm with it with a nine iron he will fuck you up because that is what pat beverly is brought in to do is just fuck with people and then and then dame obviously said paul george like you keep you know switching teams you don't want the hard work which if you're damian lillard you get to say that argument because you are you have been in in for the trailblazers your entire life uh you get to make that argument you absolutely get to make that argument uh paul george worked his way out of okc worked his way out of indiana so i think that stands but then pat beverly was like cancun on three yeah so that always that that kind of ended but then damian lillard dropped another 50 piece yeah itty burger 50 chicken

mcnuggets and the clippers are currently getting smoked by the nest which they're probably not trying yeah so it but you got to think damian lillard's gonna yeah sound off it's been funny watching you go back and forth the last couple days between the lakers and the clippers both trying to avoid the trailblazers in the first round because yeah they're the team that nobody wants to play out west oh and we officially have a play in game because the grizzlies lost again so at worst the grizzlies will be playing in a play or at best the grizzly will be playing in a playing game at worst they won't even be in the playing game but that's gonna be awesome so august 15th is the first one um if the eight seed wins the eight seeds in if the ninth seed wins they play

again the next you gotta you gotta win two to get in they should do it on aggregate yeah it should be like a two game affair that's gonna be awesome though uh-huh that's gonna be awesome one game elimination um and then we had draymond get fine $50,000 for saying uh devin booker needs to get out of phoenix on the set of uh tnt yeah well so people are saying that there shouldn't be these tampering laws anymore like $50,000 of draymond green is absolutely nothing it's actually probably worth it in terms of just like the message that he was sending to booker at that point like $50,000 to tell booker to leave phoenix fuck yeah i also i kind of love draymond and stef and clay just being the ultimate like they're they're cow they're coach cow they're always recruiting yep i kind of love

that about them yeah they're just always like we don't care you guys have already said everything you're gonna say about us we're just gonna keep recruiting talent yeah no they've and the warriors like given how they put their team together the last couple years like they are able to speak with authority on whether or not players should leave yeah their market hasn't treated them well yeah come on over although the um someone tweeted i think it was devin booker has won more games in the last week and a half than draymond has won in 2020 yeah but draymond gets to claim all the victories that he's had with stef curry and kevin durant and all that he was sons are hot yeah sons are hot uh what else we have oh billy kevin durant kevin durant did you guys see this no

oh man all right so some guy on twitter his name is z the creator i don't know or just tweeted why you such a weirdo question mark you were too wealthy for this you really went and followed my girl that's why she blocked you weirdo at kevin durant and then kevin durant was replied and said my bad i accidentally pressed follow on like dollar picks my phone tripping i love it no matter how rich you are how famous you are you're still gonna be yours you can still go to a great response yeah you can't buy your way owning it up up to it and a great attorney to get you out of horny jill everyone goes you just proven that everything i said was true you really moved like a hoe and then kevin durant said you're just enjoying this experience you won't forget about

this day ever with a bunch of that's okay kevin durant has won this one easily it's true you followed your girl he liked all her pictures and now he's just dunking on you on twitter now this guy's got a story to tell all his friends like hey you know who wants to fuck my girlfriend kevin durant right until obviously his girlfriend breaks up with him because like oh kevin durant wants to fuck me that's kind of cool what if he was really into it that's the way to handle all this like if if katie starts liking all your girlfriend's tweets but yeah katie let's do this yeah come cuck me we can only get off to it we can only hope he's like a huge lebron fan or something this is just the final nail like kevin durant going to the warriors

crushed is that not would that not be tampering what what if what if you just catfish uh booker to get him to golden state by like creating a profile of a super maybe maybe a chick with a huge dumper that's why we have dumpers on instagram and then you follow booker and you put your location in as yes oakland california yes and then just start liking all his tweets that's not tampering reminder follow big dumpers on instagram big underscore dumpers the best dumpers on instagram easily i haven't seen better dumpers in that no all right let's finish up billy's list but before we do that billy we gave a cliffhanger so you did listen did you listen yes he listened damn all right so the cliffhanger from wednesday's show that then went to friday's show that now is

here on monday's show finish it man receives random seeds from china and has decided to plant them see what happens this is illegal but the man kept wait wait one second one second what exactly do you have it written down i know but you need to read this you need to tell us what happened what happens what happened with the seeds okay just so he plants the seeds yeah and he puts miracle miracle grow on him and and a gourd pops out oh okay and well personally i think that the gourd was you know maybe there was something mysterious with the gourd and it's going to try to harm american gourds with some sort of disease or murder gourd murder gourds and guess what's a very american gourd pumpkin pumpkin whoa orange pumpkin tries to cancel halloween exactly wow

and guess what that's going to cause no pumpkin pie on thanksgiving oh my god trickle down no pumpkin pie on christmas christmas gets ruined because there's no good vibes from thanksgiving uh you could also say like what if the gourds just strangle out local vegetation they take out christmas trees no the other seeds there's a variety of seeds there's pine seeds there's all sorts of seeds so yeah maybe they're going after christmas trees maybe they're going after pumpkins these are invasive species these are murder gourds this is if you plant them then it'll take it'll suck off the life from like the the native species here in america i think whatever foreign entity is sending these seeds into the united states foreign can we already get that we

they're from china you're working for we're not going to blame nba right now billy just say communist party steve kerr over here yeah anyway billy's very sympathetic to president she i think whoever's doing this is they're very nice seeds waging the war on christmas okay so i like that i can connect but also that was worth that was worth the cliffhanger is this payback for tiktok exactly we're gonna we're gonna strangle out tiktok so we're gonna send vine over well bill gates might get tiktok that's true who would you trust with the information uh twitter might also get it too right so you have three entities chinese government bill gates earth earth billy's brain and who owns twitter again jack jack at jack which one of those guys you want having your tiktok

information we say it again chinese government yeah bill gates yeah jack jack i because i think jack is too incompetent to accurately manage my sensitive information correctly mmm bill gates so didn't he create bill gates a while ago created this thing where you could basically turn poop into water that's true but so think about all the shitty tweets we have jack invented the like button shitty tiktoks is shit more shitty tiktoks than shitty tweets right so what could we harness that into pumpkins done boom boom how the world's problems all right anything else on this sheet let's see we've got uh i had the kender ant you did you did you did good job you had whip snakes winning congrats to the whip snakes on back-to-back championship dynasty you said 12 and six are

the 2020 champions and then you put water dogs have not but you didn't finish that sentence what are we gonna say they're about the water dogs that they didn't win the championship water dogs are the best first half team in lacrosse that's just facts snake becomes strap hanger what is that i don't know there was snakes on a train that's classic have to put that on the sheet when you see that what if it was pizza snake we were all damn there's a rat snake we're all hot dog snake that would that would break the internet if a snake ate a slice of pizza on a new york city subway platform and you could see the slice of pizza in his stomach or if it was a snake's feed would be back in business i think i think right now glissies are more they're like more current they're hot

so if uh if a snake was just like deep-throating glissie like heather brook that'd be sick yeah nasa to remove offensive names from planets and other heavenly bodies that's on here too yeah uh the eskimo nebula is being nixed and the siamese you know what i'm offended by uh white white dwarfs why no reason in particular i just think that's not the things out there we should not be calling things as a guy that is five eight and have been told by numerous internet memes that i'm the size of a grain of rice i don't want stars to be called white dwarfs anymore dude that's like one million dollars in the uh in the rice thing with jeff bezos so feel good about that that's true yeah good point you're you're worth a million dollars uh anything else billy well you know what's the

biggest unintended consequence of not having college football season all the college football players can get fat belly football you've been leading the way i know yeah and then you need to do it on the internet a psa this is your this is your body on football this is your body without yeah and it's you're the aft or it's like this is your podcast with football and it's a clip of us talking about football with no billy this is your podcast without football and it's billy talking about murder horn it's talking about snakes yeah and pumpkins there it is folks scary scary world out there all right wednesday we got tim woods back doing some dungeon and dragons we'll see then love you guys billy do you have any closing thoughts yes so oh wait we forgot to mention our darling jake

yes jake broke his ankle jake joined the uh the foot injury survivors club apart my take of which myself and liam's are card-carrying members began have you had a foot injury i have had many foot injuries it's serious stuff yes so jake has a pretty much broken ankle right now which he suffered beating hank in tennis today and billy just so you know jake billy didn't laugh at you but he did a lot yeah you did billy laughed at you i was very supportive of you billy laughed at you billy set up the ice bucket yeah nobody that's after i forced him to we also told him it was an ice bucket challenge he was like sweet that was so funny right it was during the very last point of tennis of the day yeah during canadian doubles i went over for an overhead slam it went in but my ankle did not that

was like tiger woods and brooks kept a winning on an injured foot congrats you're a warrior jake thank you you're a warrior thank you guys for the help um all right billy you got anything why don't you break down jake's uh why don't you break down ankle sprains for hurt or injured jake um was a higher low ankle sprain anyway so i've been thinking a lot lately i've actually been having very vivid dreams of playing football lately i went camping over the weekend so i was deep in the woods disconnected from all sorts of internet and uh i really just started you were able to tweet a lot considering you had no internet i didn't tweet for two days and i started tweets today what the one that just said bear poop bear scat yeah that was on sunday that was my best picture

in my camping trip anyway i think i'm gonna make a comeback i'm not sure how what's gonna happen anyway love you guys okay if you say Take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off, take off. I've been missing you, baby, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been,

I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been... Before your eyes Then you'll see me far away You'll see me far away You'll see me far away You'll see me far away Take on me and me

Take on me and me Oh, baby Take on me Take on me and me Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.